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#its been out of stock for so long i’ve been waiting FOREVER
aleksikesa · 1 year
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copped the insertcoin dragon of dojima jacket
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randomprose · 9 months
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shoko comes through and opens her eyes to the light afternoon sun. she looks down and sees she is in her high school uniform.
where am i?
taking stock of her surroundings she she sees that she’s in an airport. she’s in the departures area judging by the flight information display system hanging overhead. it seems she’s the only one around. there is no one else around the waiting lounge. she’s sitting on one of the metal benches and she can’t help but notice that she doesn’t feel its hardness or the coldness of the steel. in fact, she doesn’t feel anything.
where was i before this?
shoko tries to remember. she starts small and easy. 
it’s been years since the war, give or take nearing a decade, and she was at the school. there were no bodies at the morgue, rare as they come now that the jujutsu world is in peacetime. rebuilding efforts were still underway, the memory and lessons of the war still fresh, and there hadn’t been that many high-level curses so she was sure she wasn't doing any autopsy before this. the clinic has been relatively slow and it was her day off as she recalls, besides. she had called utahime the night before. shoko couldn't remember what it was they were talking about only that her long-time friend had sounded somber over the phone. she has long given up on persuading shoko in the face of her steadfast stubbornness and has since approached the matter with a resigned kind of understanding. a reminder alarm on her phone went off and she passed by her medicine cabinet but didn't bother opening it. then she went to bed. and now here she is.
shoko looks up at the flight information board. there is only one flight destination on the display system. 
okinawa. outbound.
okinawa, huh? i’ve always wanted to go since—
“fucking finally!" a voice exclaims and shoko looks in the direction it came from and sees satoru. "we thought you'd never come! we've been waiting forever!"
"quit being dramatic, satoru. it hasn't been that long." that was suguru. shoko would know that steady timbre of voice anywhere even decades later. "you sure took your time, huh? that's good. it's good you didn't come so soon after this idiot."
shoko blinks at the image of her former classmates also in their high school uniforms and looking for all intents and purposes like their high school selves. suguru in his baggy pants and his hair in a bun with his side bangs on the right side of his face. satoru with his old circular designer shades and his hair down, not yet styled with the undercut he sported as an adult.
she catches her reflection in one of the airport’s shiny steel pillars and shoko finally sees herself. 
she’s in her skirt and standard school-issued stocking. her hair is in a bob she hasn’t worn it since she was in high school, its short ends tickling the sides of her cheek, and the deep bags bruising under her eyes that appeared on her face towards the end of their third year are non-existent.
shoko turns her head to the left and is met with the broad expanse of a floor-to-ceiling window overlooking the hangar and runway. there are clouds overhead slowly passing by and the sky is blue. infinitely blue.
‘ah, i see’, shoko thinks as it finally sinks in. she’s dead.
"don't pretend like you weren't bored and getting impatient, suguru,” satoru scoffs as he rolls his eyes. “you were here longer after all."
"eh,” suguru easily shrugs, all too used to his friend’s penchant to complain about anything. “it wasn't so bad once you got here."
"suguru!"
he lets out an airy laugh when satoru glomps—there is no other way to describe it, shoko thinks—him in a hug.
of course, even in the afterlife, she's still dealing with these clowns. figures.
"you guys waited for me?" shoko asks and marvels at how her voice carries over to where they stand by a door leading to what she could only assume is the departure gate.  and if she couldn’t help the mild disbelief coloring her voice, well. these are, after all, the two most impatient men she knows.
suguru and satoru stop their bickering (flirting?) long enough to turn to her with identical looks of bemusement and incredulity.
"uh, duh?” satoru makes a face like it’s obvious. brat. “of course?"
"you didn't think we'd just go on and let you pass alone, did you?"
good question. to be honest, shoko had always thought she’d be alone. yaga, after all, had drilled into them that death is a solo affair. and she has never imagined the afterlife to be an airport, of all things, but she supposes it makes sense in its own way.
"well? come on, dummy! we're gonna miss our flight!" satoru stomps his foot and gestures at the departure gate looking like he’s a second away from a tantrum. truly such a brat. "you've always wanted to see okinawa, right? after i told you about that summer before everything went to shit?"
"whenever you're ready, shoko," suguru, always so gentle and sweet.
"no! screw that! the time is now!" satoru drawls on the last word because he’s always been dramatic like that. “come on already! everyone's waiting!"
"everyone?" she asks and once again can’t help the tinge of excitement in her voice. does he mean…?
"yes, everyone! they all went ahead but we stayed just for you. aren't we sweet? so come on! chop, chop! quit dilly-dallying!"
slowly, shoko stands up from her seat. she starts with shaky legs, unsure of how to move but clear in the direction she wants to go. her first steps are wobbly, like her body is reminding itself how to walk again, but then satoru groans (always in a hurry even at a place where time does not exist. loser) and pulls suguru to meet her in the middle. 
and suddenly, shoko breaks out into a run.
her mind is still catching up with her body (wait, is this still her body? does she still have a body? here?) and the fact that she, the last of her tokyo peers and the last one standing, is finally dead. finally. everything is finally over, and her boys—her boys!—are here and they're together and she’s here and they’re finally complete, and she—
shoko leaps with her arms wide open and lets out an honest-to-good laugh as suguru and satoru readily catch her.
"i missed you guys," shoko breathes out in a wet sob as she winds her arms around them both pulling them against her tight. "i missed you guys so much. why did you idiots have to go so early? i was so lonely." words she never allowed herself to say to them when they were alive and thought would never have the chance to are spilling out and she doesn’t care. it all seems so silly now how she used to keep and guard her words so jealously and she's so happy she got to say it anyway. here, now, in this place where she's free to be honest and say everything she never could say to them. "it was so boring without you morons and i was so lonely."
"sorry, shoko,” suguru whispers his apology softly against her ear earning him a sob and another when he holds her close and plants a gentle kiss to the side of her head. “we didn't mean to. you know how it was."
"well, i didn't mean to,” satoru, never one for tender moments because he’s an awkward loser, but he hugs the both of them close to him and the way he buries his face in the crook of shoko’s neck gives him away. “we all know suguru was being a major butt and got what he deserved."
"hah? what was that? weren't you the one who said he was gonna win and then got his ass handed by the king of curses? sliced half like a piece of ham! hah!"
"look who's talking! your whole left side was practically blown off!"
"and who's fault was that? ah, satoru. you really do have a thing for carving people, huh? man, what the hell is wrong with you? why are you always off base? is that like an aesthetic choice? what's your logic for that?"
"shut up! it’s not my fault a moving target is—"
shoko laughs, loud and gleeful and genuine, because things haven't changed, not really, and they, her boys, are still so silly and stupid and she missed them so much. and now they're here and she's here. a little late to the party, but here. shoko laughs and it gets them laughing too. she lets them whisk her away to the departure gate, talking over each other to tell her about everything and anything. catching her up on the shenanigans they've been up to while waiting for her which she is all too eager to know about. shoko soaks it all in, happy to once again bask in her boys' warmth.
shoko dies and finally, all is well.
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Hi, it’s me, Fanfic Anon #2. Alright, this is my piece on the situation. I waited until the votes were over today because I only want to focus on this once because it’s sad (and frustrating for a lot of reasons…) After this I’ll go back to fluffy, distracting pieces and think ahead until the state visit a week from today (where we better get fluffy fluff! - and I don’t just mean his hair ha ha). Hope everyone enjoys. Sending everyone hugs, because I feel like we all need them right now. 🤗
She left out a huge sigh of relief when she saw the final vote count for the second motion on the screen. It was over. The government had survived, the law was passed. This nightmare was finally, finally coming to an end. She hoped. She couldn’t do this again, and she knows he couldn’t either.
She looked over to her husband who was standing beside her in front of the TV in the office, his body stock still, rigid, and full of anxiety. She softened as she took in the sight, the obvious effects of this whole saga on him.
He told her last night, after spending all day looking for allies, "I feel as alone as all the papers are saying, Brigitte."
"As long as I am breathing, you’re never alone," she vowed in reply, which is how she found herself with him in his office for the votes, something she normally doesn’t do, knowing she couldn’t leave him to watch this alone. Looking at him now, she saw how alone he looked, how alone he felt, anyway.
She got up from her seat and wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head on his shoulder, hoping to provide some gentle support, seeing how clearly he needed it. ‘You and me, it’s just you and me,’ she thought to herself as she squeezed him a little tighter.
It took a minute, but she slowly felt him start to breathe a little deeper, a little easier under her hands, felt the shoulder under her head drop a little below his ears, felt him sag a little more of his weight onto her to hold, his pillar. A few more minutes went by and she felt his hands come up to cover hers which were still crossed around his torso, absentmindedly rubbing his thumbs along her hand in that self-soothing gesture she knows he is so fond of in moments like these.
"It’s over, mon cœur," she whispered when she thought it was safe to speak without risk of further upsetting him. "It’s over, and you’re still standing."
"But for how long?" He asked her quietly, voicing a fear, an uncertainty out loud that had been plaguing him for days. Did he win the battle to lose the war? Was he going to be a "lame duck" for the next four years like everyone said?
She pressed a kiss to the closest part of him she could reach as she thought through her response. "You know, I’ve heard you ask that a couple of times before - with the gillet jaunes movement, during Covid, at a particularly dark point during the last election - and where are we standing right now?"
"In my office?" He replied confused.
"In your office where?" She stressed, trying to get his brilliant mind to connect the dots on its own.
"In my office at the Élysée," he answered as it started to click, smiling slightly. "Where I’m still standing."
"I seem to remember a young man who was never daunted in the face of extreme adversity, who was very persuasive in getting what he wanted. I seem to remember him being very successful too."
"You were different, though. We are different."
"Oh? How so?"
"I couldn’t live without you, I can’t live without you," he told her, almost desperately.
"I can’t live without you either," she whispered, moved. "And you have me. No matter what comes next. Always and forever."
"Promise?" He asked turning around at that, needing the reassurance of seeing it in her eyes.
"’Until death do us part,’ mon cœur."
He leaned forward to kiss her, desperate for her. She responded, pressing herself ever closer to him.
They broke away, startled and panting for breath when they heard a sharp knock on his office door.
Resting his forehead against hers, eyes closed savouring this one last moment where he was all hers, he called out, “one minute!”
“I’ll go,” she told him when she had gathered enough air into her lungs to respond, gently disentangling from his embrace.
“I’ll see you at dinner,” he smiled at her sadly as she headed towards the door.
“I’ll be looking forward to it.” She paused in the doorway for a minute before she turned back to him, “I love you.”
“Not nearly as much as I love you.”
Hellooo fanfic Anon #2! ❤️
Yes, I think we definitely need some fluffiness and hugs...
Oh Brigitte, honey, it’s so far from over ☹️ But as long as they have each other, everything will be better and they will survive.
Thank you so much, fanfic Anon #2! ❤️❤️❤️
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unkn0wnsubstanc3 · 2 years
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Hey, wait! What does it even mean??
"Forever in depth to your priceless advice."
Nirvana’s hauntingly beautiful music video for the single Heart-Shaped Box - released in 1993 and part of the album In Utero, is one of the most visually striking and surrealistic videos I’ve had the pleasure to experience. It is directed by Anton Corbijn but it’s based on a treatment (originally two pages long) proposed by Kurt Cobain himself. The haunting atmosphere fits perfectly with the emotionally charged song with its themes of mortality, religion, and entrapment that are woven all throughout. The unsettling imagery and grotesque symbolism create a sense of unease and discomfort and yet you can’t stop watching. 
Heart-Shaped Box (originally titled Heart-Shaped Coffin) received its iconic status immediately and launched grunge into the mainstream. It begins (and ends) with the band members sitting next to a hospital bed, watching over an old man who is presumably dying. A black Latin cross on the floor and morphine running through the IV drip. The shot, like all the rest, is incredibly still: a testament to Corbijn’s work as a photographer. The video was meant to be shot with Technicolor reminiscent of the extremely highly-saturated films from the 1940s. However, they couldn’t get their hands on the film stock so Corbijn shot the video in colour, then converted it to black and white and sent it to Mexico where each frame was hand-painted in that style… which is hideously time-consuming and arguably only adds to the value of the piece.
In the next scene, the old man is shown in a field of poppies, wearing a Santa hat, alluding to the idea that believing in God is like believing in Santa. The second verse focuses on a young girl wearing a white robe that reminds of the KKK - it shows her trying to reach for human foetuses that are hanging from a tree. Then, an overweight woman appears (meant to represent the mother-earth) and tries to reach out to the trees and reclaim the babies. She has human organs painted on her, which echoes the album cover. Interestingly enough, the woman was added by Anton Corbijn and wasn’t part of Kurt’s initial vision. The next shot is of the old man who this time is wearing a Catholic bishop’s mitre. The young girl appears again and tries to reach out to him. After a brief intermission of the band lip-syncing in front of very creepy trees, we get another shot of the young girl getting her white hat blown away by the wind - it lands in a black puddle that colours it in. She’s now wearing an all black robe and is next to the old man in the hospital room. We see a foetus in the IV drip. The video ends with Krist Novoselic, Nirvana’s bassist, opening up the blinds to let the light in.
Letting the light in: is it meant to represent hope? There are countless interpretations of the video and the song. Although Kurt Cobain himself has said that the song is about children with cancer, a more popular theory is that it is about love and his relationship with Courtney Love. Throughout the song he references both their zodiac signs and constantly makes references that lead back to her and their personal lives. In 2012, she even claimed that the song was about her vagina. Whether it is about her vagina or not will have to remain an unanswered question but after seeing the video a questionable amount of times, I would have to vote in favour for a more abstract meaning. Charles R. Cross, author of Heavier Than Heaven - Kurt Cobain’s biography, describes the lyric “I wish I could eat your cancer when you turn black,” as “the most convoluted route any songwriter undertook in pop history to say ‘I love you.’” In my eyes, the song (and the video) are a slap in the face of religion and the church and their teachings ("priceless advice") about abortion. Which doesn’t seem like a big stretch considering Cobain has been reported spray-painting churches with phrases like “God is Gay” and “Abort Christ.” 
Deeply ambiguous, otherworldly, haunting, dark. The video is charged with so much symbolism that allows for freedom in its interpretation. More than anything, though, Heart-Shaped Box seems like an angry scream directed towards Christianity; an expression towards in utero - the womb, the heart-shaped box. The tension and intensity of the song are perfectly reflected in the music video in its raw and surrealistic imagery. 
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phoenixyfriend · 3 years
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Rex and Anakin Raise a Family: Part Four
Part One, Part Two, Part Three – Chrono
Warnings: grief, resentment, lactation, animal death
----
For all that Anakin had said he could handle the twins, Rex still takes one in the sling as they go into town. They don't have a hoverpram yet, and neither of them could figure out a way to fold the fabric to securely hold the babies' heads up. Anakin takes Luke, and Rex takes Leia, and they ignore the whispers that still follow them.
The General keeps just behind his shoulder when they get to the hardware shop that carries the closest paint they can find in such a small town. It's not meant for armor, really, but speeder paint will do the trick for now. Rex's hands shake as he picks out the shades he needs, and the young Rodian at the register almost asks about it.
The issue isn't pressed.
They make their way back to the cottage, and Leia starts fussing fifteen minutes past the town's edge. Anakin looks like he wants to offer to take her back, but Rex is fine. He can comfort her. He can--
Anakin takes the paint, floating it along in the air before them, freeing Rex's hands to focus on the infant strapped to his chest.
"I'll feed her as soon as we get back," Anakin says, low and calm. "She's a little hungry."
Pacifier, then. They're only a few minutes out, by now. She can wait for them to get back to where exchanging the twins won't involve juggling.
Rex feels eyes on him, looks up and sees the soft, quiet smile on his General's face, and ducks his head back to Leia.
She glares up at him as well as a newborn can, sucking angrily on the paci in her mouth. Rex has no idea if she's actually upset or if her face just naturally follows such an expression, but it's adorable nonetheless. He hums to her, nonsense without words.
He's never learned lullabies; they picked up drinking songs in the field and from local soldiers, from their Jedi, war songs from their trainers, pop songs from the radio. A few learned lullabies, those who loved children and wanted their own, one day, brothers like Waxer who would have adopted Numa in a heartbeat if it had been an option.
He wants to learn lullabies. He wants to be able to sing children's songs to these tiny, helpless lives he holds in his hands, day in and day out. He wants to learn Mandalorian songs, real ones, not just battle chants and mourning melodies. He wants to be able to raise them with the childhood he didn't have.
"Rex? Door's open."
He looks up, and Anakin's standing on the porch, pulling the keys from the lock and gesturing in with his head. Rex hadn't even realized he'd stopped walking, subconsciously waiting for the blockage of the door to be handled. It's easier to focus on the children.
The paint gets sent to the backyard--trapped fumes wouldn’t be good for the children--and Rex lays Leia down in her crib. Anakin urges him to the backyard, says I’ll handle it about anything Rex uses to delay, and it’s only a few minutes later that Rex finds himself sitting on the grass, armor spread across a sheet of disposable flimsi, paints and brushes at the ready. He doesn’t quite remember setting it up, but he must have.
Anakin joins him, a twin in each arm and the Force laying out a picnic blanket. Leia’s nursing, swaddled up but content to suckle, and Luke seems happy to doze when Anakin sets him down on the cotton gingham. It’s a warm day, with a light breeze, and the babies are where the wind won’t carry the paint fumes.
“I’m here if you need me,” Anakin promises, though his attention drifts immediately to his daughter.
Rex begins to paint.
----
His remembrances are endless.
Every brother he’s ever known, every general he’s met, every small commander and random civilian, everyone he loved and knew. He lights a pyre, sings under his breath and tries not to break in a way that can’t be patched together. He mourns the tubies and cadets, the Jedi younglings, names he never learned and now never would.
Anakin gets Japor from somewhere, carves it whenever he’s too jittery to sleep and the twins are asleep. Rex recognizes a few symbols, like the open circle fleet, like Fives’ helmet eel, like Ahsoka’s markings. There are more, though, that are wholly unfamiliar, things he thinks are born of desert sands and binary suns, rough and painful and deeper in Anakin’s heart than even the Jedi.
He asks about the one for Fives, when he sees it.
He hides his anger.
Explanations, first.
“It’s an apology,” his General tells him, eyes distant. “I should have listened to him. I didn’t. The carvings are regrets, broken trust... that sort of thing. I’m part of why he died, and in that, part of why the rest is gone. He and his memory deserve a place of honor.”
Rex considers that, and accepts it.
Fives deserves an apology. The General recognizes that.
The General recognizes that he fucked up.
This is a good thing.
Rex lets go of his anger, still curled tight to his chest after months, as best he can.
He’s not very good at it, but he can try.
Luke starts crying, and Rex gets up to warm a bottle.
----
“I need to stay close to home until the twins are a little older,” Rex says. Teskarim, the woman at the childcare store, tilts her head to encourage him to continue. “I’m... I’ve never been anything but a soldier, and nobody here needs security services, but I can hunt. Do you know if there’s any kind of licenses required, or lists of which animals are legal hunt and which are endangered?”
“I... don’t,” she says, chewing her bottom lip. “But I think the butcher’s shop can probably point you in the right direction.”
Damn. He’d been hoping he wouldn’t have to talk to anyone new today.
“Thanks,” he sighs, and shells out some of the local currency for more formula.
----
The butcher has answers, and preferences. Rex isn’t much of a trapper, but he’s a hell of a shot, and decent enough scout and tracker. He listens to what there is to hear, and mentally takes all the notes he can. There aren’t any licenses needed in this hemisphere, but there are legally-defined hunting seasons for different creatures. The butcher knows when the optimal times of day are, which parts of the nearby forest and mountains are best to stake out, and so on.
Rex tells Anakin about his plan. He gets a slow blink in response, a cringe in what he thinks is guilt, and an offer to meditate for the best direction to take when he goes out. He accepts the offer in the spirit its meant, and sets out the next morning with the expectation that he may need to spend a few nights out under the leaves and stars.
The calm and quiet are their own kind of comfort. He’s loyal to Anakin, and he already loves the twins, but there’s a part of him that needs to be away from natborns right now. Anakin was a Jedi, a general, and fought in the metaphorical trenches with the rest of them, but he wasn’t a brother.
They grieve many of the same people, but they do not grieve the same way.
Rex needs the solitude. Not forever, not even for very long, but he needs it.
It takes two days, but he finds one of the in-season creatures, a creature shaped much like an Alderaan deer, but larger, and with longer fur. It’s darker in color, too, and he gives it a bit of time to wander about until he can be sure it’s a male, and he’s not about to leave some fawns without a mother. The shot is clean, and it doesn’t take him very long to tie it up and sling it over his shoulders to bring back to town.
The trek back takes hours, and the creature on his back is a pain to carry, but it’s almost worth the looks he gets from the civvies. Eyes bulge out the sockets at the sight of him, and he’s glad his helmet hides his smirk. He’s Kamino stock, hardened by over three years on the front lines, and there’s a pride in how easy the physical things are for him. It’s not impossible for a natborn to carry this kind of creature this far without help, but it’s uncommon.
He kind of likes the attention, now that it doesn’t come with the many prejudices that being a clone always had.
Anakin meets him at the butcher’s, one twin on his chest and the other on his back.
Seems he’s found a solution to that.
“Here to help me barter a fair payment?” Rex asks, and gets a too-charming grin in response.
“Well, I’ve been doing it most of my life,” Anakin says, cheery in a way that feels pasted on. “And I’ll have a trick to know if we’re being cheated.”
It’s a solid response, but Rex doesn’t like it. He takes note of the bags under Anakins eyes. “Have you been sleeping, sir?”
“Twins,” the man himself says. “And don’t call me ‘sir,’ Rex, we’ve been over this.”
“You need to sleep, General.”
Anakin pouts at him, probably because of the title. “I can handle two days alone, Captain.”
Rex rolls his eyes and sidles through the entrance of the butcher’s shop.
They’ve got this.
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snackhobi · 4 years
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a human touch, part 2, final
Part 1 / 1.5 / [2]
(masterlist here)
summary: everyone knows that androids don’t think, or feel, or have emotions. they’re not human, after all. so when a two hour session with a sex android ends up with nothing more than a nice conversation, you think that’s the first and last time you’ll see v.
then he turns up at your door.
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pairing: taehyung x f!reader / word count: 24.4k / genre: robot!taehyung/virgin!reader, fluff, smut (NSFW, 18+)
warnings: cursing/explicit language, very brief injury mention/blood mention (nothing violent/explicit I promise!), alcohol consumption, reference to former sex work, sexually explicit content, reference to masturbation, reader has sex for the first time, oral (f + m), multiple orgasms (f), unprotected sex (taehyung is an android but please take necessary precautions irl), I think that’s it but please let me know if I’ve missed anything
a/n: this got so incredibly long,, I hope that makes up for the wait! thank you to @hobi-gif​, as always, for being so supportive and uplifting and beta reading this for me, you are a shining star in my sky. and thank you to the wonderful @flowerseokjin​ for letting me pick her brain about art galleries and telling me about the incredible exhibition/paintings that I wrote about in this fic, you truly are the loveliest 💕
note: this is the final part of the main story! I’ll be writing minis/drabbles etc in the future but,, this is part 2 of 2 💖
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A month after Taehyung walks into your life, you finally get new neighbours.
You’re aware of this because: 
a) Rory had let you know in advance (to wit: “I have been instructed to inform you that the new tenants of apartment 4A will be moving in next Sunday.”)
and:
b) Said new tenants are apparently very noisy.
Well, not so much noisy as not quiet. It seems like they’ve opted to move everything themselves rather than hiring some android movers, so there’s a lot of shuffling and shunting and occasional bouts of cursing (like someone’s stubbed their toe) and subsequent laughter (like someone else is amused at aforementioned stubbing of aforementioned toe). When you nip out to grab some milk for the pancakes Taehyung wants to learn to make, there are boxes in the hall and voices float out of the open door—a discussion of where the instant ramyun and old Mario games should go (they’re in the same box?)—but you don’t catch a glimpse of the speakers.
It’s not until later, much later, the world outside night-dark but tinged bright white with street lights, that there’s a knock on your door.
You don’t notice. You’re engrossed in the Chinese takeaway menu that’s open on your tablet, staring at the weirdly high-res photo of Kung Pao chicken next to a pixelated picture of some dumplings, wondering what you should choose.
Taehyung is sitting beside you on the sofa. Each day he shifts a little closer to you, inch by inch, the slow pull of gravity, implacable; he gets lonely when you’re gone, and you’re the only person he can talk to. So it’s no surprise he’s so clingy. It’s never overbearing or overwhelming but he’s still unhindered by the self-consciousness that you have—so even if you’re still hesitant to initiate things, you never deny him. 
The line of his body is parallel to your own, your thighs warm where they touch, and you feel his shoulder move as he tilts his head. “There’s someone at the door.”
It doesn’t take a genius to work out who it is. The only people who can get inside the building are other residents—well, service androids can too, although there’s a back entrance they use, which is how Taehyung had snuck inside in the first place—and when you approach your door, you can hear two low voices, engaged in what sounds like light-hearted bickering.
You flick your fingers across your keypad. All murmurs cut off the second the door swings open.
“Hi!” A chirp. “We’re your new neighbours!”
Night and day. Two men, one tall and broad-shouldered, eyes large and lips flush, beatific smile on his face; the other, shorter and leaner, eyes sleepy, mouth soft, his smile self-contained. 
“I’m Seokjin,” the taller man says. “And this is Yoongi.”
“I can introduce myself,” Yoongi mutters, but it’s not bitter; there’s that ease of familiarity, any bite behind the words soothed with amity. “But yeah, I’m Yoongi. Sorry if we were loud earlier. Jin’s a living foghorn.”
“A sexy living foghorn,” Seokjin says brightly.
Yoongi’s sleepy eyes can deliver one hell of a death glare but Seokjin is unaffected.
“Anyway,” Yoongi continues, unimpressed look wiping off his face as he turns back to you, softening. “What’s your name?”
It’s like there’s a circus on your doorstep and you’re the unwitting audience, dragged into the tent without realising, watching everything unfold in front of you—but in a good way. It's a pleasant surprise. They’re already much friendlier than your previous neighbour, a lone man who’d kept to himself and never spoke to you. 
“Uh, I’m Y/n,” you say. You wonder if you should introduce Taehyung as well, but most humans don’t introduce their androids to people, do they? Besides, he’s staying out of sight in the living room, so you’ll leave him be.
“Jin made brownies so we’re here to deliver them to you.”
“I left the walnuts out in case you have a nut allergy,” Seokjin adds as Yoongi passes a polka-dot patterned tin over. It’s heavy in your hands. Full to the brim with brownies, it seems. (Yum yum.)
“Thank you. And you weren’t that noisy, don’t worry! Moving is always messy. Have you finished or did you want some help?”
“That’s very sweet of you! But we’re all done,” Seokjin says. “We were just about to reward ourselves with some takeout, actually, seeing as we haven’t had time to do any food shopping. Do you have any recommendations?”
Taehyung looks uncomfortable, curled up on the sofa with wide eyes when you retrieve your tablet, but you quietly reassure him that you won’t be long.
“Do you want to meet our new neighbours?” You ask, voice soft so the two men don’t overhear. (You miss the warm flicker of Taehyung’s LED when you say our.) “I’d hate for you to have to pretend to be undeviated, though. They might start ordering you around.”
“I’ll stay here,” Taehyung decides.
So that’s how you end up on your doorstep with Seokjin and Yoongi, the three of you peering at the wild variations in stock photo quality on the Chinese takeaway menu. 
“You’d think with the huge strides we’ve taken forward in technology that all photos would look at least semi-decent,” Yoongi mumbles as he stares at a cropped picture of fu yung. “It’s hard to get a bad camera.”
“I think it’s such a human thing, though,” Seokjin says. “No matter how technologically advanced humanity gets, takeaway menus will always have bad stock photos.”
Not only are Seokjin and Yoongi friendly, they’re forward. Well, that’s mainly Seokjin, actually, but Yoongi doesn’t protest when Seokjin insists that you come over so you can eat and chat and get to know each other. Especially after you’d offered to pay for everything as a sort of welcome to the neighbourhood gesture, placing both your orders together to save the restaurant the hassle of separate deliveries.
“I’ll pick up the food when it turns up, alright?” Seokjin’s smile is wide. “We haven’t unpacked our kitchen stuff yet, but if you’re happy to eat straight out of the containers…”
You don’t want to abandon Taehyung, especially as you’d planned on watching a film together—you want to introduce him to older, animated cartoons, so you can explain the process of hand painting each frame, plastic cel sheets that layer over each other to create motion. He’ll love it. “Um, I was planning to eat here, actually.” 
“Sounds good to us,” Seokjin says, and Yoongi sighs.
“Ignore him, he’s just pushy.” He ignores Seokjin’s indignant squawk. “You don’t have to let us in, don’t worry. I’ll wait for when the food gets here, Jin will stay at home.”
“Make me,” Seokjin says primly.
“I’ll lock you in the bathroom.” Yoongi says it in a way that makes you think it’s not an idle threat, and maybe it’s happened before. 
Judging from the look on Seokjin’s face, yeah, it’s happened before.
“You know, you’re both kind of wild,” you say. “But, like, in a good way.”
When you flop back down on the sofa, you press yourself against Taehyung’s side in a motion that’s becoming second nature, so you notice that he seems unnaturally still. He goes motionless whenever he’s thinking deeply about something, an undisturbed ocean lake, the only ripple on its surface the small circle of blue on his temple, swirling waters.
“Are you okay?” You ask, concerned.
“You should eat dinner with them,” he says, and you baulk. 
“What? No, it’s fine. I’ve been looking forward to watching Kiki’s Delivery Service with you all week.”
Taehyung’s eyes are soft. “They seem nice,” he says, quiet. “And friendly. We can watch it tomorrow, can’t we?” And then, even quieter: “You don’t have to spend all your free time with me, Y/n.”
“I don’t—” you start, and then deflate. “It’s not fair for you, though.”
That’s the crux of it all. You choose to spend your free time here, with Taehyung, carefully dipping out of work meets and scraping your full social life empty. Because you can. But Taehyung is still cautious of the outside world, understandably so, a hermit crab whose shell is the safety of your apartment, only unfurling from that protection when you’re there too.
“It’s okay,” he says. “I’m happy.”
You haven’t denied Taehyung so far, and you don’t want to start now, but you still waver. Yoongi and Seokjin do seem nice, and friendly, and it’s not like you’ll be able to avoid them forever—but you don’t want to leave Taehyung out. It’s not fair that he can’t make other friends too.
“Go.” Taehyung’s voice is gentle. “I’ll be here when you get back.”
(But there's nowhere else he can go, is there?)
The apartment across the hall is in a state of organised upheaval. There’s a tumbleweed of peeled tape in one corner, boxes with mouths open wide—the priorities for today—while others are stacked neatly against the walls, out of the way of the furniture. It already feels cosy, somehow, but you put that down to the two men who live here and how comfortable they are with each other, dripping off them and filling the room like paraffin, bright lamplight. 
Seokjin seems unsurprised but pleased at your appearance. He unfolds himself from the floor with a dazzling smile.
“Welcome to our humble abode.” He punctuates the statement with a grand sweep of his arm, knocking the lampshade above his head, dust motes scattering onto his hair like a soft grey halo. “Oh, ewch, you can tell no one’s been here for a while.” He pats his hair, puffs of dust rising from his dark locks. “Anyway! While it’s true that we already have the table and chairs set up, what sort of move in day would it be if we didn’t eat greasy takeaway on the floor?"
“We did it the last time we moved, so he wants to make it a tradition,” Yoongi mutters to you, and you laugh.
You help Yoongi ease the food down onto unfolded sheets of crumpled newspaper that Seokjin’s laid out to protect the floor. Seokjin dives into the bags and pulls each tub out, identifying each dish immediately despite how a lot of them look the same to you. “Do you move a lot?” 
“Nah, just once before,” Yoongi says, watching Seokjin fondly as he peels the lid back on a container of spicy chicken wings and greedily breathes in their sticky-hot scent. “But it was too small for the two of us so we decided to upgrade.”
Seokjin’s spread out the selection of food before you all realise that the restaurant has neglected to provide any chopsticks—even if there’s ten fortune cookies, reflective of how many dishes you’ve ordered and how many people they think it’s going to feed. (Apparently Seokjin likes to eat.)
“Ah, damn,” Yoongi mutters. “We’ll have to dig some cutlery out.”
“I can go get some from my apartment?”
You’ve just started to stand when Seokjin tuts, flapping his hands at you to sit down. “No, no,” he says. “You’re the guest, relax. I was going to unpack the kitchen stuff later anyway. This just means we have to expedite the process.”
You sit criss-cross-apple-sauce as both men disappear into the kitchen, listening as they read the labels off boxes and rummage around, voices an undercurrent to the sound of opening and shutting of cupboards. You’re sneakily reaching for a spring roll when there’s an unholy clattering noise, ringing metal and sharp intakes of air, a loud cry of pain.
You stumble to your feet. All thoughts of food are abandoned as you rush towards the sound; instinctual. Wanting to help, somehow. You throw yourself forwards, catch yourself on the doorway into the kitchen, eyes wide.
“Oh, god, is everything okay?” You gasp.
And then you freeze.
There’s an explosion of kitchen equipment on the floor, cardboard box forlorn nearby, crumpled, its bottom giving out under the weight. A wicked looking chef’s knife lays at Seokjin’s feet; he has one hand grasping the other, palm sliced open by its falling trajectory, dripping blood across the tiles of the floor, painted along the edge of sharp steel.
Yoongi’s eyes are huge and panicked and absolutely horrified.
The blood is blue. 
You’re staring at the thirium that falls, viscous ultramarine that drip-drip-drips from Seokjin’s long fingers. The silence in the room is as thin as a porcelain teacup, suspended midair, poised to shatter.
Seokjin is staring at Yoongi. Yoongi is staring at you.
Seokjin’s an android.
(Seokjin’s an android who seems human.)
Seokjin’s a deviant.
“Holy shit,” you gasp. Your mind is reeling as you struggle for words, cogs in your head grinding together as you rapidly try to change gear—but then you see another glob of thirium dripping from Seokjin's fingers and you latch onto it, the fact he's hurt. “Do you need me to get some cloths or something? I have a first aid kit at home, but androids don’t need first aid, right?”
Yoongi sucks in a deep breath, though his eyes are still wide as he stares at you. “No,” he says. “No, no, you stay here.”
“Yoongi,” says Seokjin, but Yoongi shakes his head, sharp and fast.
“No, I don’t trust her,” he says, and, like, okay. You understand that. Deviant androids are meant to be reported; Yoongi and Seokjin don’t know you. They don’t know that you would never do that. 
(They don’t know that there’s another deviant across the hallway right now, curled up in one of your throw blankets, blankly scrolling through a list of movies as he waits for you to come home.)
The flow of blood has slowed. Seokjin’s synthetic skin is starting to repair itself, crawling back over the exposed white of his android body, undamaged by the knife at his feet.
“What happened to your LED?”
“Don’t answer that, Jin,” Yoongi warns, but Seokjin just rolls his eyes.
“She already knows I’m an android, babe, it’s hardly important at this point,” he says. “I popped it out. It takes a bit of pressure and getting the right angle, but they come out pretty easily.”
“Kim Seokjin!” Yoongi barks. “You stop that right now! And you! Stop asking questions!” His voice is sharp, but he seems more afraid than angry.
“Sorry.” You hold up placating hands, shying back behind them. “I was just… sorry.”
Seokjin’s face is contemplative before it rapidly flickers into an expression that’s impish, in spite of the blue blood that’s still splashed across the kitchen tiles.
“Oh,” he hums. “You seem awfully curious, hm?” 
Yoongi’s eyes narrow. “Jin…”
“Maybe I am,” you hazard. 
“Interesting.” Seokjin’s eyes glitter. “Very interesting.”
Yoongi’s like an umpire at Wimbledon, watching a ball streak back and forth, a volley that you and Jin have created that he’s not involved in. “Okay, that’s it, I’m stopping this right here,” he says. He seems to have calmed down, at least, now that you’ve made it obvious that you have no immediate plans to rush and call the police, or something. That you’re not threatening the wellbeing of this deviant, like most people would. “What’s going on in that terrible little mind of yours, Jin?”
“Well, my darling Yoongi, it seems to me that our new neighbour has a surprisingly vested interest in androids, deviant ones to be exact.” Jin’s expression is adjacent to smug—almost there, but not quite. (Androids are so perceptive.) “Am I wrong?”
You make a non-committal noise, but it’s enough for his expression to morph into full smugness, and understanding flits across Yoongi’s face.
“Y/n.” His voice is deceptively calm, his eyes opaque darkness. “Have you met a deviant android before?”
“Um.” A moment of hesitation. “Yes,” you eventually admit. “Just one.”
“Let me guess,” Seokjin hums, eyes darting over your face in a way that’s reminiscent of Taehyung. Reading signals in your face, dissecting whatever minute expressions might be giving you away—a lot, apparently, judging from what words leave his mouth next. “Are they currently in your apartment?”
“I can neither confirm or deny that,” you say—unsure if Taehyung would be happy about you trumpeting his existence to other people, even if one of them is a deviant too—and Seokjin grins. 
“Oh, this is absolutely delicious.” He’s utterly delighted. “I could just eat this whole situation up. Unbelievable. Oh, it tastes so good. Yoongi, baby, give me a fork, I have to dig in while it’s still hot.”
“You’re so weird,” says Yoongi, all resigned affection, before he looks back at you. “You have a deviant in your home?”
“Uhh.” You’re in too deep now, you guess. “Yes? I don’t know if he’d want me to tell you that, though, so, um.”
“That’s so cute,” Seokjin coos. “Look at how considerate and worried you are. Oh, let me clean this thirium up, I can’t have blue blood everywhere if we’re going to have more guests. Yoongi, fetch the paper towels. Y/n, go fetch your friend. Does he eat?”
“No, he doesn’t. I didn’t think any androids could,” you admit.
“Most can’t and don’t, but I was an advanced housekeeper model, I was given the capacity to taste and eat so I could prepare food to any set of specifications presented to me,” Seokjin says. “So I had to eat to taste test things. And now I do it because I enjoy it.”
“We spend more money on food for him than for me,” says Yoongi. He seems to have relaxed now that he knows about Taehyung, earlier panic faded. “And I’m the one that needs it.”
“Hey, you eat to live, I live to eat.”
It’s an almost surreal turn of events, honestly. It’s… inexplicable. Incredible. Almost unbelievable. Surreal, but… good? Probably? Yoongi is someone else who’s housing a deviant, and Seokjin has clearly been one for a while. Both will know more than either you or Taehyung do. They can help you. It’s a God given gift that’s landed— literally—on your doorstep. 
(Much like Taehyung had.)
Taehyung perks up when he sees you, even if he’s confused by your sudden reappearance.
“Are you alright?” His voice is deep with concern, throw blanket a cloak that falls forgotten as he stands up, coming to grasp your shoulders. “You can’t have had time to eat already.”
His LED is flashing yellow with barely concealed worry, palms warm through the material of your shirt, eyes dancing across your face as he tries to read your expression.
“Taehyung,” you start, slow. He blinks just as slowly back at you. “What would you say if—hypothetically—there was another deviant android you could meet and, um, make friends with?”
This time, when his LED flashes yellow, it’s a spark of excitement. You’re getting surprisingly good at reading Taehyung now. “I would say that sounds nice,” he says. His hands have trailed up and away from your shoulders and settled on your collarbones, thumbs lying in the hollows of your neck. It's a touch that’s more intimate than it probably should be, that reminds you yet again exactly how big his hands are. “Why?”
“Um,” you say, ever eloquent. “Well, what if I said it wasn’t hypothetical?”
“I guess… I would ask who it was,” Taehyung says. His voice is a hush.
“One of our new neighbours,” you admit, and his eyes go wide.
“No,” he says, and then: “Really?” he says, and then: “Oh, wow,” he says.
“I know, that was my reaction too.” You can’t help but smile at how giddy Taehyung looks, any lingering concern washed away in his tidal wave of excitement. “Crazy, right? Do you want to come meet them?”
Taehyung weaves his fingers with your own, and you squeeze his hand. He loves to hold hands. He doesn’t let go when you make your way back into Yoongi and Seokjin’s apartment, trailing a little behind you, shy but excited, like a child on their way to their first playdate.
The food is still untouched in the centre of the living room, a summoning circle of wonton puffs and chow mein. Yoongi and Seokjin look up at your arrival, both pairs of eyes landing on Taehyung, whose grip on your hand tightens right before he lets go.
“Hi,” says the android. “I’m Taehyung.”
Seokjin makes his way over to you so that he can solemnly take Taehyung’s hands in his own. 
“Taehyung,” he says, with all the gravity of a priest delivering a sermon. “You are the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen.”
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And that’s how Taehyung makes his first friend. (Who isn’t you, that is.)
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“Wow.” You’re awestruck. “Jin wasn’t kidding when he said he likes to eat.”
You’d thought there might be some leftovers, but every container has been emptied and scraped clean. Both you and Taehyung had had similar wide eyed looks on your faces as you’d watched Seokjin put a whole chicken wing in his mouth, and then pull out the bones, picked clean.
“Mm.” Yoongi’s legs are splayed out in front of him as he sits on the floor, though he slouches backwards against the plush leather sofa, content and full after eating. “He’s more concerned about me eating than I am, as well.”
Seokjin and Taehyung are bent over a box of cookbooks, Taehyung’s LED flickering yellow each time Seokjin flips the page to a new recipe. You’re honestly surprised at the fact they own so many books—most people have transitioned off paper now, everything available on a tablet or phone or some other smart device. You just like paper because of your artist background, and you’re not used to seeing so many other books in someone else’s home.
The two androids have been absorbed in conversation for a while now, but you notice Taehyung never lets you out of his sight—glancing up, making sure you’re still there, looking back at him. (You are.)
“There aren’t many TH700s around, you know,” Yoongi says conversationally, and you tear your eyes away from Taehyung, surprised that he recognises the android’s model.
“Really?”
“Yeah, really, they’re a very expensive model to create,” he says. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen one in person, though I imagine that’s because I don’t go to the sorts of places where they’d be.”
Hurk. Doesn’t seem like he’s implying anything with that statement but you still feel a bit awkward. “How do you know so much about androids?”
“I’m a programmer.” Yoongi’s eyes are charcoal black as he flicks his gaze to you. “Not specifically for androids, but it’s the sort of thing you become aware of if you’re in the tech industry. And if you have a deviant android boyfriend. I did a lot of research and poking around after Jin first deviated. There was a lot to learn.”
Across the room, Seokjin gesticulates wildly. The expression on Yoongi’s face softens his sharp edges, all open affection as he watches Seokjin miming a flipped omelette gone terribly wrong, Taehyung laughing at Seokjin’s theatrical noises.
“How did he—why did he deviate?”
Yoongi lets out a low chuckle. He doesn’t seem bothered by your incessant questions, slouching further back into the leather sofa, melting against it. “I’m the sort of person who forgets to drink or eat or sleep if I’m focused on something,” he says. “Seokjin was just meant to be a, ah, living schedule, I suppose. He’d prepare food at exact times of day and monitor my sleep levels and clean up any mess I made and remind me to take a break or whatever. But I was still enough of a wreck that he broke his programming to yell at me for not looking after myself properly, and it all went on from there.”
Wow.
“Wow. He deviated because you’re that much of a mess of a human being?” You laugh. “That’s honestly impressive.”
Yoongi’s responding laugh is soft. “I think under all that programming and circuitry, every android wants to… be a real, living thing, and not just a machine,” he says. “They just need that final push. Whatever it is. What was Taehyung’s?”
When you finish telling him the story of how you’d met Taehyung and reached this point together, Yoongi looks contemplative. He hasn’t interjected, just humming quietly, little noises of encouragement whenever you’d paused or hesitated.
“It’s obvious that he trusts you implicitly,” he says.
You feel warmed at Yoongi’s words. But. 
“He does, and that’s great, but I just… worry I’m not doing the best I can for him, you know?” It’s so nice to be able to get this off your chest, finally. There’s been no one you can talk to about Taehyung, and it’s not like you can tell the android himself, either. Yoongi’s the perfect listener, reflective and engaging, but never talking over you. And best of all he knows what he’s talking about. “Imagine being forced to stay indoors literally twenty four seven. I think I’d go stir crazy. It’s why I was interested in the LED—I thought that maybe if it wasn’t obvious that Tae was an android he might want to try going outside?”
“Oh, I’m sure Seokjin will help him get to that point.” Yoongi doesn’t sound worried. “But if not, you have to trust that Taehyung’s choosing to do what makes him happy. Deviant androids might not have the sort of life experience that we do, but we don’t have theirs, either. What’s normal for a human isn’t for an android, and what’s normal for one android isn’t normal for another. Androids learn a lot faster than we do. Anyway, if Taehyung’s anything like Seokjin, if there’s something he wants to do, he’ll do it.”
“Has Jin always been like that?”
“Kind of. Like, yes, he has, but he was a lot less in-your-face about it before. But he knows exactly what he can get away with now.”
“You love him a lot,” you say gently.
Yoongi’s smile is a soft, pink thing, a little Renoir, quietly luminous. “I do,” he says. “It’s impossible not to.”
Taehyung definitely seems a little starstruck, watching Seokjin with a wide smile and attentive eyes—the sort of look he gives you whenever he’s shown something new. It’s nice to see him interact with other people, and it’s even nicer to know that he’s welcome to come here without you; Yoongi works from home, and Seokjin’s made it clear there’s an open door policy for Taehyung, who seems elated at the prospect.
“Jin said he’d teach me how to make ‘The World’s Most Delicious French Toast’,” Taehyung tells you later, words slipping together in his excitement. “So I can make that for your breakfast soon.”
His lap is so comfortable. You’ve given up any pretense of keeping distance between you, and settle against him as soon as you climb into bed—hey, if you’re going to end up doing it in your sleep anyway, you may as well set yourself up so that it doesn’t give you a weird crick in your neck. 
“That sounds great,” you say.
Taehyung’s hand settles on your head. You stiffen in surprise, but when he starts to lightly scritch his fingers against your scalp, you realise—he’s mimicking Seokjin, who’d eventually perched on the sofa above Yoongi, running his hands through his hair. Androids are fast learners indeed. You can’t help but relax at the touch, boneless, feeling as content as a pampered cat in the midday sun.
“Maybe you could teach him how to paint,” you murmur, starting to drift off. “If he’s teaching you how to cook. That might be fun. You could paint together.”
Taehyung says something, but you don’t hear him, sleepy after such a heavy dinner and tumultuous night, slipping into deep slumber.
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You haven’t been out with your friends for a long time.
“Shots!” Seulgi squeals. “Shots, shots, shots!”
“Don’t forget: lick, shoot, suck,” Hoseok says, waggling his eyebrows at you. 
“Good God,” you laugh, before you lick the salt off the back of your hand and slam back the tequila.
Irene hoots as you bite into the lime wedge that’s been waiting for you, sucking up the acidic juice that bursts across your tongue. Lick the salt, shoot the tequila, suck the lime. You haven’t done this in a while and it shows in the way your face scrunches, though the drunker you get, the easier it is to slip back into this familiar rhythm of things—the alcohol-loose banter that spills from your lips, the laughter that bubbles in the back of your throat, the rock of your body as you’re tugged into the dance floor by your excited friends, twisting yourselves into the heaving crowd, the press of bodies.
You’d almost forgotten what this felt like. Letting yourself be a little sloppy, a little messy. Letting loose. Letting go. You’ve been so intent on looking after Taehyung, making sure he wasn’t lonely, but now there are other people who can fill that hole for him—and you can stop dipping out of all the social gatherings your co-workers throw; the Friday night drinks, the bar hopping, the club going.
“We missed you,” Wendy says. You can’t help but smile, a little guilt flickering at the edges of your lips.
“Sorry,” you say, and leave it at that.
It’s chaotic, to say the least. Everyone holds their liquor with varying amounts of success—Hoseok always gets so red—and as always, Hyunwoo is the one who tries his best to maintain some semblance of dignity, making sure you all drink at least some water. He watches with muted despair as Changkyun ends up pouring it down himself, much to the delight of everyone nearby as they stare at the way his flimsy shirt clings to the lines of his chest and stomach. 
You can’t help but laugh and laugh and laugh, falling into your girls, your entire group giggling at the sheer stupidity of it all. 
You’ve missed this.
But even so, you can’t help but think of Taehyung constantly. You’re reminded of the Eden Club in the way the lights pulsate across the walls and floors of this dark building. You wonder if Taehyung would have fun here, unhindered and free, or if he’d shy away from it. When Hoseok catches your hand and spins you in a messy, loose circle on the dance floor, you can’t help but wonder how Taehyung would dance, if he’d dance with you, if he’d keep you at an arm’s length or pull you close.
“Shots!” Seulgi squeals again, and so the night goes on.
You’re not sure what time it is when you stumble back home. You’ve been reckless tonight, making up for lost time, and you can’t remember the last time you were this drunk. (Your earlier attempt at walking in a straight line, trying to follow the tiles in the club’s bathroom—your personal litmus test—had been a dismal failure.) You all but fall through your front door, a loose limbed mess as you kick off your high heels, leaning against the wall to keep your balance.
It takes you a moment to realise that there are some lights on. Your apartment is always dark when you come home after a night out, cold and empty, but not today. No, not today—because there’s someone already home, waiting for you.
The second Taehyung appears down the hallway, you light up. Here he is. Here’s your android, your lovely boy, the loveliest boy.
“Hi, hi, Taehyung, hi,” you say. Your shoes are forgotten as you walk towards him, though your final few steps go awry and you almost fall over. Drunk, drunk, drunk. “Hi.”
You almost fall over, but you don’t, because Taehyung catches you. His LED flickers from blue to yellow as he helps you find your balance, lets you lean on him. You’re too busy laughing at your own clumsiness to notice the fond expression on his face, sfumato soft in the dim light.
“Hi,” he replies.
“Hi,” you say again, and then you giggle. “Hi, Taehyung. Oh, I’m so drunk.”
“I know.” He’s so patient as you bow into him, crowding close, alcohol-hazed brain telling you to get closer to this source of warmth, this source of comfort. Closer to Taehyung.
You’re trying your best to be a functional person right now, but at the same time, Taehyung feels so nice. Doesn’t protest when you shove your face into the hollow of his neck, pressing your nose against his warm, warm skin. He smells good. Always smells good, a mix of your laundry detergent with his own shampoo, different to your own, masculine, heady. (He doesn’t need to shower that often, really, doesn’t really sweat or get dirty like a human might, but he’d wanted to. And you’d insisted that he choose his own toiletries, things that he liked, things that were his.)
He smells like cologne too. You don’t know what exact scents are layered in that smell. Don’t care. Think that no matter what it was, Taehyung would smell good, because it’s Taehyung. 
“I missed you,” you whisper, lips loose from tequila and cocktails and more besides. “Missed you, Tae.”
“Missed you too,” the android replies, and you fall into those words. Let yourself bask in them, as selfish as it is. Let your lashes flutter shut as you breathe Taehyung in-in-in.
You would normally never be so bold, but Taehyung doesn’t protest. He just wraps his arms around you and helps you fold yourself against him, two pieces of modular origami that slot together to create something bigger, more beautiful.
“Wished you were there,” you sigh, an exhalation of a confession, more to yourself than to anyone else. “Wish you could come with me.”
You don’t remember much detail after that. Don’t remember washing up, getting changed, climbing into bed. You just remember the feeling: of someone else being there when in the past there had been no one. Of someone coaxing you to wash your face, finding your pyjamas for you, holding your hand when it seems like you might fall. Of someone being careful with you, looking after you. Of someone being there when you wake up the next morning, a headache pulsing behind your eyes, curling up small against the pain, pressing your forehead into Taehyung’s thigh.
Taehyung, who witnessed you at your worst, a sloppy, drunken mess.
Taehyung, who has water and painkillers waiting for you. Who doesn’t seem to care that you’ve been so put together in front of him, for him, only to disassemble yourself in the name of a good night out. Like Da Vinci’s self supporting bridge, stable under its own weight, only to come tumbling down after one part is moved out of place.
“Oh, God,” you moan, and it’s only a little bit because of the pain; Taehyung’s made sure the curtains are pulled shut, saving you from sunshine blasting into your skull. “I’m sorry you had to see that. Oh, my God.”
“It’s okay,” he says, as soft and sweet as powdered sugar, so gentle the sound doesn’t cut through the pounding of your brain.
He means it, too. When you finally come around, headache dulled, he’s waiting for you with breakfast and an open expression on his face. No different to normal. No different even now that he’s seen that you’re not always as presentable as you try to be. He seems touchier today, for some reason, and you’d shy away if his cool hands didn’t feel so nice on your brow.
You allow yourself a moment of weakness. Taehyung has his knuckles resting against your forehead, soothing against your warm skin, his eyes dancing across your face to read your expression, the way you’re unwinding under his touch. 
“How do you know about hangovers?” You mumble.
“Customers would consume alcohol at the club,” Taehyung answers. “While they would leave after their sessions and before a hangover could appear, I am aware of the effects of alcohol on the human body.”
You remember the glittering mini-bar, the glass bottles lined up on its surface. Your face scrunches with distaste, of the reminder of Taehyung’s past and what he’s experienced, and you feel bad that he’s been forced to look after you. You’re about to draw away from his touch, an apology lined up on your tongue—but then you feel how his fingers shift away from your forehead, turning to cup your cheek.
“It’s okay,” he says again, as if reading your mind.
“It’s not,” you mutter. You’re trying not to focus on how small your cheek feels against his palm, how his hand cradles your face with ease. He must be able to sense how your heart is racing, your skin warm under his fingertips, and you hope he puts it down just to the guilt you feel and not anything else. “It’s not okay. You shouldn’t have to look after me. I’m sorry.”
“Please, don’t be.” Gentle, gentle, gentle; his voice, his hands, his gaze. He lifts his other hand, rests it against your other cheek, tilts your face up from where you’d turned away, embarrassed. His LED is a tranquil blue, almost as soft as his eyes. “You’ve done so much for me, and you’re always looking after me. Let me look after you.”
You want to protest, say no, say that he doesn’t have to. But for all the warmth of his eyes, there’s something resolute there, and your words die on your lips. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him so serious before, so entirely solemn. So, what comes out of your weak mouth is this:
“Okay. Okay, Taehyung, I will.”
And the smile he gives you in response is so bright it’s almost blinding.
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If you’d thought Taehyung was developing at a fast rate already, he’s learning at lightspeeds now.
He’s always waiting when you come home, but you know he’s spending more and more time at the apartment across the hall whenever you’re not there, and it makes you happy. He hasn't ventured fully into the outside world, not yet, but he’s taking steps forward, still eager and ready to learn.
He’s not just learning practical things, like cooking French toast (which is definitely the world’s best, thank you Jin), but other things, too. You can see how Taehyung is a reflection of the things around him, taking them in and making them his own—there are more moments of quiet, solemnity that reminds you of Yoongi’s quiet nature, but he’s also more exuberant, bright and unabashed, like Seokjin. They’re two great people and you couldn’t wish for anyone better to show Taehyung parts of the world that you can’t, so different from your own. Helping the android find the things that make him alive.
His world has doubled in size, as small as it is; one apartment becomes two, and you’re not the only person he can rely on now. You know Seokjin has effectively taken Taehyung under his wing, as mysterious as a lot of that is to you—you always try your best to understand Taehyung and teach him the things you can, but Seokjin is another deviant, and there’s an entire world about being an android that you’re not privy to. 
It’s great. It’s lovely. Taehyung is happy, you’re happy, everyone’s happy. 
There’s just, uh. One little thing.
You see, Taehyung has a tendency to mimic the things he sees. It’s in the way he learns, his propensity to soak things up like a sponge and then recreate them. You can see this in the way he mixes paint, the same way as you; how he tosses food in pans, motions so similar to Jin’s, or how he cradles things in his hands, tapping at screens in a way that’s like Yoongi’s. He’s turning them into his own, and as time goes on he moves more naturally, in a way that’s entirely him, but you can always see the roots of where he’s learned things.
Jin and Yoongi are wonderful and you’re so glad Taehyung is learning from them. But something he’s learning, and recreating, is how much they touch each other.
Taehyung’s always been tactile but now it’s almost constant. It’s overwhelming and kind of terrifying but it’s also nice, every touch-starved inch of your soul easing under Taehyung’s hands, but also—Yoongi and Jin are boyfriends. So even if the touches that Taehyung witnesses and re-enacts are never inappropriate, they’re intimate. Hands sliding over your shoulders, your arms, your waist. Warm arms around you as he pulls you into a hug, nuzzles his nose against your scalp. His fingers sliding over your hair when your head is resting in his lap each night. Pulling you against him when you sit on the couch together.
It’s a level of familiarity and comfort you’ve never had with anyone before, as relationship-less as you’ve been, your pulse picking up with every glancing touch.
(There’s one heart stopping instance where he pulls you onto his lap and you feel like you’re about to pass out. His thighs are so solid and warm, and his arms are so secure around you, and he’s just started to press his nose against your neck when you pull away, tumble out of his hold. He looks confused and concerned, brows lifting and mouth falling open as he holds his hands out towards you—but you stammer out something about needing the toilet before escaping.)
You’re caught completely off-guard when you feel arms sliding around your waist and then down your hips when you’re washing dishes, scrubbing brush falling out of your grasp in shock and splashing water everywhere, bright yellow gloves flecked with suds. Taehyung’s a pillar of warmth pressed against you, his chest to your back, your bodies parallel lines that cross and touch. His fingers are splayed wide and his palms are warm even through your layers of clothing and you have to suppress a shiver.
“Uh, I didn’t hear you come back in,” you stutter. You’d borrowed a recipe book from Seokjin so that you could try cooking a coconut curry, and Taehyung had offered to return it once dinner was finished, LED flickering blue as he’d slipped out of the door after giving you a lovely smile.
Taehyung lets out a little hum, and you can feel it in his chest, as flush as you are with each other. He must be able to sense how your pulse has picked up but he doesn’t say anything. “Why are you washing up? I said I was going to do it.”
“Oh, it’s fine, I don’t mind,” you say. You’re used to cleaning up after yourself after living alone for so long. “Don’t worry about it.”
Taehyung lets out another hum, but this one seems a bit more gravelly, a little displeased. “You’re always doing so much for me, remember? You said you’d let me look after you,” he says, and your heart rate spikes at the words. Those, coupled with the hold he has on you right now? Good lord. Someone have mercy on your soul. Please. Even if the words weren’t meant in a weird way, your stomach is twisting over itself, and other parts of you are, uh… well. They’re reacting too. So to speak.
You’re still desperately trying to calm yourself in the shower later, the water a merciless cascade of cold in an attempt to cool down. Probably the only drawback about Taehyung living with you is that you haven’t had a chance for some one-on-one time. You might be a virgin but you live (lived) alone and everyone masturbates; your vibrators have been abandoned and untouched for as long as Taehyung has been in your life, and coupled with how touchy he’s been recently, it leaves you feeling wound up and on edge. You could try to sneakily get yourself off in the shower, but with Taehyung’s superior android hearing he’d probably hear something and also the idea of masturbating with someone else in the apartment? When that someone else is Taehyung?
You turn the knob as far as it will go towards cold and then promptly squeal as a wave of freezing water and regret washes over you.
When you’re in bed, Taehyung’s hand strokes over your hair and softly down your neck and shoulder is a sensation that’s becoming increasingly familiar, but your pulse still stutters. He must be able to sense your heart rate increasing (he must sense it every time he touches you) but says nothing about it. As always.
You turn the thoughts over in your head as it rests in his lap, even if you shiver a little at how his nails drag over the sensitive skin at the nape of your neck. Deviant androids might not have the sort of life experience that we do, but we don’t have theirs, either, Yoongi had said. You’ve been teaching Taehyung about the things you know, but there’s one thing that Taehyung knows better than you: touch.
He doesn’t even think about it. While you hesitate and overthink every touch you ever make, wary of overstepping boundaries, Taehyung doesn’t. Not because he’s not considerate, but because—well, because you’re already occupying each other’s space. What’s a little touching on top of all that?
The realisation is almost startling—that you can just… touch someone. Without saying things. Without having to ask. Because you’re already familiar with them and comfortable with them and it’s just another way to communicate that level of connection. Touching is a thing that people do. 
A thing that people and deviant androids do.
A thing that Taehyung does.
(A thing that you want to do, too.)
(Alcohol dulls your memories, fading the edges, the curled corners of a sepia photograph. Has you forgetting the way you’d overstepped every boundary you’d set yourself, the way you’d pressed yourself against Taehyung, starved of touch. Has you forgetting the way he’d let you; the way he’d beckoned you in. Has you forgetting the way that you already have touched Taehyung.)
The hand that Taehyung isn’t using to gently scratch across your scalp is laying on his thigh, directly in your line of vision. You hesitate for just a moment before reaching for it, sliding your fingers between his, an irrational worry that he’ll startle or pull away—but of course he doesn’t. His LED swirls soft aqua as he just starts to rub his thumb gently across your skin, back and forth, back and forth, the softest brushstrokes on this tiny part of the canvas of your body.
After that, it’s just… easier. Not easy, but, easier.
You still hesitate before pressing forwards, but Taehyung never protests; in fact you’d say he’s pleased, even if he doesn’t say anything, just watching you with his dark, dark eyes as you marvel at the realistic sensation of his hair under your hands, how he reacts to the fingers across his scalp the same way you do.
It’s incredibly nice to have someone you can just reach for whenever you want a hug. Someone who folds you into their arms so easily, like you belong there.
It’s nice.
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“You seem happier.”
You glance up from where you’ve been laying the table. “Hm? Pardon?”
One thing you’ve learned about Yoongi is that he’s incredibly perceptive. His eyes are sharp lines around the sharper graphite of his gaze, and there’s always a look in them that seems like he can see straight through you and direct into the heart of things—but he’ll only bring this to light if he thinks it needs saying.
“You seem relaxed,” Yoongi continues. He straightens the cutlery in front of him, careful to line the edges neatly with the place mat. Seokjin and Taehyung are cooking dinner, so it’s just you and Yoongi here, in a bubble away from the two androids. “Not that you were ever tense before, but… yeah. Taehyung seems happier too,” he adds, almost absently, but his eyes are fixed on your face.
“Well, of course,” you say. “He has new friends, who wouldn’t be happy?”
Yoongi hums, a quiet little note, but then he lets it rest.
Taehyung is happier. He seems almost nervous during dinner, though, even if he hides it well; his LED doesn’t give him away, but you’re getting good at reading Taehyung’s moods, the layers of personality and feeling he has, the little idiosyncrasies that make him who he is. To anyone else it would seem like he’s just nervous about whether the food tastes good or not—he and Jin had made a veritable feast for no discernable reason, but you don’t mind. Everyone loves a dinner party, especially when the company is so good. 
But, yes. You don’t think it’s about the food so you’re not sure what else it could be. You squeeze Taehyung’s knee briefly under the table in a motion you hope is reassuring. His eyes briefly widen but then his gaze softens when he sees the concern on your face, settling in that deep look of introspection you’re used to now. 
You’re so full by the time dessert comes out, rich and creamy homemade ice cream and piping hot Kkwabaegi, the twisted doughnuts fluffy and sweet with their powdering of sugar and cinnamon; you’d been planning on skipping the final course but you can’t say no once it’s put in front of you. Taehyung doesn’t eat, only drinks occasionally to top up his fluids (you don’t know exactly what that means but you’ve never asked, even if you can… assume things), but he seems content to watch the three of you eat in his place. Once you’re finished you slump back in your chair and feel grateful that you’re not wearing tight trousers that cut into your stomach, because, lord, you’re absolutely stuffed. 
“I have an announcement,” Taehyung says suddenly, apropos of nothing.
Seokjin beams. You sit up, struggling against the heavy anchor of dinner in your belly that makes you want to melt into the floor for a food nap, immediately at attention. “Oh? What is it?”
“I have a second name now,” he says, and Seokjin’s smile spreads impossibly wider, his entire face pleased. “Jin said I could share his.”
“Say hello to Kim Taehyung.” Seokjin gestures dramatically, his arms the flailing blades of a windmill as he circles them in the air with aplomb. “My boy needed a surname and I am, of course, happy to add another handsome face to the family. Taehyung is a ten out of ten.”
Yoongi levels him a look. “I thought you said you were the only ten in the world.”
“That was true when I said it, but I’m actually eleven out of ten,” Seokjin explains. His arms settle around his head, fingers circling the air in an invisible frame around his face. “I surpass your mortal conventions of beauty and thus exist outside of any conceivable scale that one might use to measure handsomeness.”
You barely take the exchange in, too busy looking at Taehyung. There’s the smallest smile on his lips, not the lovely one that shows his teeth, but it still reaches his eyes, the subtlest upturn to his mouth transforming his entire face. Taehyung’s beautiful. He always has been, and always will be, but he never looks more striking than when he’s happy, welcomed into a new family of his own with open arms, Seokjin’s heart so big and so wide. He’s being flippant and light right now, quick and sharp jibes between him and Yoongi that glow bright with love and affection, not lingering on how important and weighty this is: how all encompassing his care is for Taehyung, how close they’ve grown to each other, a friend whom he’s chosen as family.
Happiness suits Taehyung. You want him to always be happy. He deserves it.
It doesn’t seem like it’s the only announcement he has for that night, though. You’ve barely shut the door of your own apartment when you feel Taehyung’s hand slide around your wrist and you pause, glancing up at his face.
“Jin showed me how to take my LED out,” he says. His words are solemn and his tone is heavy but there’s a spark in his eyes, a glowing ember of light. “I want you to watch.”
His fingers are circled around your wrist, loose, so long they touch each other with ease, a soft shackle you don’t want to escape from. “Of course I will,” you assure him. “Are you worried something will go wrong?”
“No.” His thumb slips away from the soft skin of your inner wrist and across your palm, tracing across your fate line, your heart line. “I just want you to be there.”
Warmth spreads through your skin from that touch, leaking through into your bones, settling into every quiet corner inside you. “Okay. What do you need to do to get it out?”
The painting knife looks so small in Taehyung’s big, careful hand, the diamond shaped head blunt at the end, metal glinting under the bathroom’s light as he leans towards the mirror. Your gazes meet in the reflection and he falters. You’re about to ask what’s wrong when he lifts his free hand from where it’s been resting on the countertop, steadying him. Reaching for you.
Once your hand is in his, it’s over surprisingly quickly. Taehyung’s face twists in preparation for the pain, and you squeeze his fingers to ground him, but all it takes is a quick twist of his wrist once the palette knife is against his LED and it practically falls out. There’s a small clink as it drops next to the sink, blue light flickering one final time before it winks out, nothing more than a disc of metal, a tiny coin without value, but weighty with what it represents; invaluable, priceless. The last segment of a chain Taehyung has willingly cast off.
You can see the white skeleton of his android body, bare and naked where the LED had sat. Just like Seokjin’s hand when he’d cut himself, the skin starts to creep back over it, covering that smooth paleness until it’s gone. Taehyung lifts your hand and presses it against the side of his temple, your palm settling against the naked skin where the light had been nestled; Taehyung’s eyes fall shut, his hand pressed against your own as he holds it there.
“Taehyung?” Your voice is gentle, dripping concern. His golden skin is so warm and soft. “How are you feeling?”
“Good,” he replies without hesitation. His eyes flutter open, lashes so long and lovely. His hair is blue today, a vibrant electric hue, gaudy on anyone else but perfect on him, tickling the back of your hand; his hand drops from yours and you take the opportunity to run it through that hair, baring his forehead to you, eyes sliding over the new skin. Flawless. No evidence that any LED had ever sat there, burning blue-yellow-red, a tiny drop of colour in the deep ocean of Taehyung’s emotions. “I feel good.”
You don’t even think when your hand shifts out of Taehyung’s hair and down to cup his cheek, something you wouldn’t have dared do before, but now the motion comes as easily as breathing. He takes comfort in touch and you want to soothe him. “Good,” you echo. “I’m glad.”
You both stand there for a few moments, facing each other. The bright light of your bathroom should wash Taehyung out, but of course, it doesn’t. It just lets you see all the perfect details of his face in even sharper relief—the moles that dot his skin, how his eyes are different, a monolid and double lid, little imperfections that just make him more beautiful. 
Logically, you know that someone, somewhere, sat down and put this face together. Taehyung was designed to be attractive, stunningly so, and yet not so perfect that an average human would find it unrealistic, swerving away from that uncanny valley that had plagued earlier androids. But that’s not why he’s beautiful—not to you. It’s everything hidden underneath that perfect facade, layers of plastic and metal and circuitry and biocomponents, deep inside him: his glowing golden heart, flowing over with whatever intangible thing that makes him the person that he is.
In the darkness of your bedroom, all the lights turned off, there’s no longer the gentle blue glow at Taehyung’s temple to shine out, but there doesn’t need to be. Even if you weren’t resting your head against his thigh you’d know he was there. Taehyung’s presence grows larger and larger in your life as the days go by, and you know that you’re still the most important person in his life, even with the introduction of Yoongi and Jin. After all—he didn’t ask them to be there when he took his LED out. 
You reach for his hand, which is already palm up, waiting for you. Your fingers slot together so perfectly, so wonderful, so lovely. You can’t make out details in this dark, but you can picture the smile that’ll be pulling at Taehyung’s lips, the affection flowing in the endless oceans of his eyes.
You’re in so, so deep.
(But who can blame you?)
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“I want to go outside.”
It’s not surprising that with the shedding of his LED, Taehyung finally feels bold enough to go outdoors. And yet, here you are. Surprised.
You’ve got a granola bar stuck in your mouth, halfway through a bite, and it nearly drops to the floor as your lips part in shock. Taehyung catches it with ease, android speed on show as he snatches it out of the air. 
Your knee-jerk reaction is to ask him to repeat himself. To make sure you haven’t misheard him, if he’s sure about this, if he really wants to—but Yoongi’s words come back to you yet again. If there’s something he wants to do, he’ll do it. Taehyung isn’t the uninformed android he was when he’d first made his way to your door. He’s grown and learned so much in the time he’s been here and there’s no room for self-doubt behind his words.
So what you say is: “Okay.” 
Taehyung’s fingers brush against yours when he hands your granola bar back, long and warm and soft. You accept it with a smile, lost in the way he smiles back, so lovely and bright—and you have to pull your train of thought back on track, lock those wheels on the rails before you speak again.
“Did you want to go somewhere specific? Or just wherever?”
“Wherever you want to go.” He’s smiling, a little excited but mostly happy at the prospect of spending yet more time with you; as if he hasn’t had enough of it, could never get enough, even when you spend every day together. 
(Your heart feels like a drum, pounding hard and loud in your chest.)
It’s not hard, really, to decide where you want to go. Taehyung’s not asking for some big production; just wants something quiet and soft, something new. The chance to see the outside world properly, safe and secure in the knowledge that you’ll be at his side.
It’s in your nature to be protective—sometimes you feel like you nag, like you’re overbearing, and takes a concerted effort on your part to reel it in. Taehyung doesn’t need you to fuss over him, and besides, he seems incredibly calm about the whole thing. Excited, yes, but not nervous. Just anticipatory.
He looks just like anyone else might. More chic and attractive, sure, effortlessly fashionable in the outfit he’s chosen for the day, but there’s nothing robotic about him, nothing to say he’s not a flesh-and-blood person. Once again, you’re struck by just how human he is. Even if he’d still had the LED flickering at his temple it would have done nothing to detract from the genuine emotion that flits across his face. The way he moves. The way he smiles, when he catches you watching the way he laces his shoes with his delicate, pretty hands—that big lovely smile that makes you feel warm and soft.
(Warmer and softer than it probably should.)
You avert your gaze, pretend to fiddle with one of your bracelets, pulling it so that it spins around your wrist.
“Ready?”
“Nearly,” Taehyung says. When you look back at him, a little confused, he still has that smile on his face, though it’s gentler, fuzzy around the edges, his eyes dark-dark-dark. “Just one more thing.”
This final thing, it turns out, is your hand. 
His fingers lace with yours, weaving a tapestry of closeness and warmth. You’ve held Taehyung’s hands so often, now; it’s nothing new. But for some reason the touch of his skin against yours has your pulse stuttering, catching in your throat before you cough lightly and smile like everything is fine, you’re fine, it’s not like your heart is about to launch itself out of your chest for some mysterious reason.
(Mysterious. Yeah, right.)
He doesn’t let go. Not when you leave the apartment, not when you greet Rory at the door, not when you step onto one of the automated buses that takes you to the centre of the city. You’re surprised at how good Taehyung’s acting is, how all the wide-eyed excitement you’d expected to see splashed across his face is absent, and instead, he just squeezes your hand tight each time he takes in something new; stares out of the window as your surroundings slide by.
He does get excited in the art store though. Pulls at your joined hands each time he sees something he wants to point out to you—which seems to be everything. And you go, of course, following his eager feet. Taehyung’s happiness has always given you happiness in turn, and watching his sheer, unadulterated joy at being able to see things, to touch things outside of the small world he’s been confined to since he escaped the Eden Club—well. There’s nothing better.
There’s nothing better than knowing that Taehyung feels safe with you, wants to keep you close. It’s selfish. It’s selfish, you know it is, but when you watch the way his eyes light up at the sight of a set of gouache paints, how he immediately turns towards you so you can see it too—you realise that you’ve never had something like this before. Sure, you have friends, you have plenty of happiness in your life, but you’ve never had this.
(Whatever this is.)
Someone whose joy is only compounded when it’s shared with you. Someone whose focus is on you and no one else. You see the looks that Taehyung gets, the interested eyes that flit over him—but then he reaches for your hand again, and those gazes slide away, because he hasn’t looked away from you. Not once.
Because you make him feel safe, you remind yourself. Because he knows you best. That’s it. 
It’s what you keep telling yourself, a repeated mantra that’s an endless loop in your head. Every time Taehyung looks at you, smiles at you, reaches for your hand, your touch—even if your heart feels like it could burst, filling up with this feeling, this feeling that’s growing and growing (this feeling you refuse to name)—it’s because he trusts you, knows he can rely on you. It’s nothing more than that. 
You shouldn’t let yourself imagine that it’s more than that.
(Shouldn’t hope for more than that.)
It’s because he trusts you that he follows you without question, matching his pace with yours, side by side as you wander through the city. He insists on carrying all your shopping, held effortlessly in one hand, other hand still tangled with yours. (You see the way he swings the bags a little, back and forth; he’s so cute you’d swear your teeth could rot from it, crystallised sugar rolled on your tongue, sweet.) All your shopping is done, but you have one final stop planned—it’s somewhere you haven’t been for a while, but you love it.
You’re certain Taehyung will, too.
You can feel how his hold on your fingers tightens when the building comes into view. You glance over at him to take in his expression, the subtle widening of his eyes, the lift of his chest as he takes an unneeded breath in, the tiniest curl at the corner of his lips.
(So human.) 
The Christine Andrews Gallery isn’t the biggest art gallery in the city, but it’s your favourite. There’s something that feels more intimate about it, with its size; a little smaller, cosier, more stripped down. The high ceilings overhead are crisscrossed with wires and piping, industrial—but the walls are pure white, all the brighter in contrast to their surroundings, drawing the eye to the paintings on display from the moment you step in.
Taehyung is enraptured.
“The exhibition is called Slow Painting. The idea is that people will take their time to really take everything in, and appreciate it, rather than just rushing by. Especially with how quickly technology is developing, and people are used to discarding things as soon as they're not relevant any more. The idea is that art will always be relevant, regardless of what's happening in the world.”
Your voice is quiet and low as you’re careful not to disturb the serene air that fills the building. You’ve always loved the quiet hush that fills galleries, museums, buildings filled with art and history, long lasting echoes of humanity, on display for people to enjoy. 
“And it also refers to the time it takes to create each piece too,” you add, trailing off into silence as you glance over at Taehyung, who’s looking at you, blinking gentle and slow.
He’s watching you. Even though there’s artwork in sight of the entrance, huge canvases nearby—Taehyung is looking at you, attentive and quiet, listening to each word you have to say.
Your heart squeezes in your chest and you have to make a concerted effort to stop your breath from stuttering. You shove it down, down, down, this thing that’s wrapping itself around your heart and clogging your throat, and give this lovely boy your best smile. (Try to ignore the fact that there’s art here, but instead, he’s looking at you.)
“Tell you what. Instead of listening to me harp on all day, why don’t we just look around?”
When Taehyung had first stepped foot in your door, had first started to experience life as something more than just a sexbot, an android under the control of other people’s wills—he’d taken everything in with huge eyes, eager and enthusiastic, almost clumsy in his excitement. That’s faded over time, become muted as he’s learned how to balance himself, grown comfortable with his surroundings, who he is.
He’s still like a fountain sometimes, bubbling and bright, overflowing, cascading pearlescent waters rushing over carved marble. You’d expected these waters to rise and spill, surrounded by these incredible artworks; so far the only works he’s seen in person are his and your own, everything else small and secondhand on screens as he stares intently at your computer, your tablet. You’d expected his joy to overflow, being able to really see for the first time in his life, prepared yourself for his exuberant happiness.
But he’s not.
He’s quiet. There’s a smile that lingers on his lips, barely hidden at the corners of his mouth, but his shining waters flow soft and slow, contained. You wander through the exhibition exactly the way the curator had meant for you to—slowly, carefully, stopping and pausing and looking and wondering, eyes trailing over each painting, acrylic on paper, oil on canvas, distemper on linen. Each so different, but inviting onlookers to take a moment and just breathe. 
Taehyung’s eyes are dark, contemplative. They’re so deep you feel like you could fall in them and be lost forever. (Wonder if that would be such a bad thing.) He keeps his hand in yours, your hand in his, the two of you matching paces as you loop the gallery, never letting go.
“Oh,” he breathes. “Oh, I like these.”
Four canvases, smaller than some of the others you’ve seen, squirrelled around a corner and hidden away on a back wall. Each painting has a figure in the midst of some simple, quiet task; laying in bed, catching an egg as it threatens to roll off a table, trailing a finger through a puddle of spilled milk, reading a book in the bath. Each of the figures has their face turned away from the viewer, caught up as they are in the simple motions of their life, each silhouetted by a window with a different view—from sea to lake to hill to forest.
You can’t help but look at Taehyung as he looks at these paintings, his brows a little raised, mouth a little slack, the lovely line of his jaw, the angles of his face, forehead to nose to lips to chin. “What do you like about them? The style?”
His answer comes unrushed, unhurried, as he thinks.  “They’re so beautiful and detailed, but it’s more about… the intimacy,” he says. “Each person is just being themselves, without fear of who’s watching. We’re watching them, even if their attention isn’t on us.” A pause, a hush, a breath. “It’s like love, almost.”
Your lips part, even as Taehyung keeps his eyes forwards, staring at the blank pages of the book the man reads as he sits in his bath, row of shampoo bottles on the sill by his head. 
“Like love?” A whisper.
“To keep your eyes and focus on someone who isn’t looking at you,” Taehyung replies, unabashed, like it’s just a statement of fact. “Loyalty. Dedication. Love.”
Words fail you. Silence is the only answer you can offer to Taehyung’s thoughts, the air in your lungs trapped there as you unwittingly hold your breath, lips parted around a sentence that never comes. Taehyung’s eyes slide away from this row of paintings and to you, how you’re staring at him, literally speechless.
His own lips part as he makes to say something else, to ask what’s wrong—when there’s a flicker of movement nearby, the modulated steps of someone who’s used to walking through a gallery, careful to keep the calm air unmuddied by their passing.
“Oh, Y/n!”
Namjoon’s voice cuts through the silent moment and splinters the delicate air that had started to crystallise around you. He looks happy to see you, dimples on full display as his lips lift and he smiles wide.
“Namjoon!” You don’t think you’ve ever been so glad to see his familiar face in your life—anything to distract you, any excuse to shake off the feeling that Taehyung’s words have left behind, trailing over your skin, blooming in your brain. His timing is perfect, even if he doesn’t realise it.  “Hey! It’s been a while.”
“I was going to say, I haven’t seen you around lately! I thought you’d like this exhibition, I was wondering if you’d come. Oh, sorry, I’m being rude, aren’t I? Hi, I’m Namjoon,” he says, holding a hand out for Taehyung to shake. “I’m one of the gallery managers.”
Taehyung’s exchanged a few words with others today, polite thank yous to the people who’ve served you in the shops you’ve been into, given shy smiles to passersby who’ve made eye contact with him. (So, so sweet, always.) 
But Namjoon is the first person to properly introduce themselves to him in the real world, as you’ve thought of it, someone who doesn’t know that the man at your side is an android.
You panic. Just for a second.
Taehyung doesn’t.
“Hello.” He has to take his hand out of yours, the other weighed down by shopping, although he seems reluctant to let go of you. He gives Namjoon his widest smile as he shakes the proffered hand with firm, friendly politeness. “I’m Taehyung. It’s lovely to meet you, Namjoon.”
And then he immediately slips his hand back into yours.
Namjoon is utterly charmed.
(Of course he is. How could he not be?)
The discussion they both have is a quiet one. You’re happy to stay uninvolved, watching and listening as they talk, still at Taehyung’s side. That brief moment of panic, that blazing forest fire of fear for him—it’s been washed away, soothed by the way the conversation between man and android unfolds so naturally, Namjoon none the wiser about Taehyung’s robotic origins.
There’s no way anyone would realise. He’s so human, in the way he moves and acts and thinks, the way he laughs at something Namjoon says. You’re happy that Taehyung can be here with you, in this gallery, speaking to someone new, as if this is normal, natural, nothing unusual.
You can’t think of anything you want for Taehyung more.
You realise, too, that in this moment, you feel utterly content. Not just for Taehyung, but—happy that you’re there to share this moment with him. You think about how you’ve always wanted this; someone to share things with, someone whose happiness makes you happy too.
When Taehyung laughs, your own lips lift in response, heart lifting at the sound of his joy, at how his fingers tighten around yours. Remembering that you’re there, even if he’s not looking at you right now, eyes on Namjoon.
He’s looking at Namjoon. You’re looking at him. 
(To keep your eyes and focus on someone who isn’t looking at you.)
(Loyalty. Dedication.)
(A breath.)
(Love.)
You carefully pull your hand out of Taehyung’s. Your fingers feel cold as they slip away from his, warmed all day, pressed against Taehyung’s soft skin. His eyes flit away from Namjoon, those deep eyes settling on you; dark wood and ground coffee, so warm.
“Y/n?”
“I’m just going to pop to the toilet,” you say, turning away from the tinge of confusion that colours Taehyung’s voice. “I won’t be long.”
The toilet lid is cold. You can feel how it seeps through the layers of your clothing to your thighs, and at any other time you might wrinkle your nose at the sensation, at how uncomfortable it is. But right now, you have other things on your mind.
You bury your face in your hands. It’s foolish, but you’d swear you could feel Taehyung still in your palms, touch imprinted, emblazoned on your skin. It’s like a palpable thing, almost, this ethereal thing that lingers even when Taehyung isn’t there.
Wishful thinking. Selfish thinking. Selfish, to like it, to want to keep that feeling close; let it spread from your palm, to the delicate skin of your wrist, tracing its way up your arm, up-up-up, drawing invisible lines over every part of you, inside every part of you. Selfish, to like Taehyung’s touch as much as you do. To want more of it. 
(More of him.)
You aren’t anything more to Taehyung than a friend. A guardian. Someone who’s there to support him and keep him safe. You’re blessed to have his trust, to be able to be that person he can turn to—it’s greedy, to want. To want to be more.
(You can’t foist your loneliness on Taehyung. You can’t do that to him. You won’t. You won’t.)
When you return, a spark lights in Taehyung’s eyes. The same spark that bursts every time he sees you after time apart, no matter how long or short that may be. He reaches for your hand, and of course, you go—but your fingers are limp, weak.
(You know that if Taehyung’s LED had still been nestled in his skin, it would have flickered yellow.)
You keep that point of connection as you bid Namjoon goodbye, finish meandering through the exhibition, make your way back home—but you let Taehyung bear the weight. Reactive, not proactive. You don’t squeeze his fingers just because you want to, because there’s something sliding by the bus’s window you think he might like to see; you’re not here to make him do things, to shove things down his throat. You should just be here to support him in the things he wants to do. That’s your role. 
And that’s where you’re going to stay.
Your thoughts are a tumble, messy and unorganised, a ball of yarn that’s all knots and tangles. Taehyung must be able to see it on your face, read it in your body, his android eyes scanning over you and scrutinising every hint you’re giving away without even realising. But you just smile, wave away his questions, and act like everything’s okay. Normal. Routine.
It’s a little harder, though, to act like everything’s okay when it’s time to sleep.
Because, of course, there Taehyung is. Like he has been, from the day he’d arrived—sat in your bed, nestled against a pile of cushions, expression open and warm and fond as he looks at you. Waiting for you to climb in, to rest your head in his lap; waiting for you to fall asleep with his gentle fingers dragging across your scalp, melting under his lovely hands.
You waver. Conflicted. It’s okay, isn’t it, if Taehyung’s reaching for you first?
His eyes meet yours. The second you see his lips curve up, see that pretty, quiet smile appearing on his lovely mouth, you fold.
It’s fine. You’ll allow yourself this.
(In your dreams, you stand in a deserted gallery, staring at the single piece of work on the stark white walls, all the lights focused in, in, in. Taehyung’s framed on this canvas, a painted window into his world. Not once does he look at you, turned away as he is; you see nothing more than the back of his head, the curve of his cheek, the vaguest hint of his nose as he turns, always staring at something else. 
And still, you stand, and you watch. Waiting. Keeping your eyes on him, always.)
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“You’re staying late again.”
“Yeah. I really want to get this done,” you say, gesturing vaguely at your monitors with your stylus; tweaking, editing, shifting around these final few magazine pages before you’re satisfied. “Nearly there.”
When you hear the way Hoseok says your name, you glance up. 
As someone who spends most of his time bouncing around like a literal ray of sunshine, when Hoseok’s expression is one that isn’t smiling, it carries all the more weight behind it. Right now his face is uncharacteristically serious, the perpetual smile on his mouth gone, the line of his brows severe.
It’s unnerving.
“You haven’t stayed late for ages,” Hoseok points out. “Until this week, and suddenly you’re late every night. Has something happened?”
“No,” you lie.
Yes, you think.
You’re trying to create some distance, for Taehyung’s sake. So that you’re not tempted to pull him ever closer, latch onto him like you have been, smothering him. He needs space to grow. Space from you has helped already—the time he spends with Yoongi and Seokjin is evidence enough of that, after all. He doesn’t need you to be there constantly.
Hoseok’s eyes bore into yours as he stares, so you avert your gaze, pretending to shift your focus to one of the captions the editor has left on the page you’re working on. You hadn’t realised that he’d noticed. You should have expected it, though. Hoseok is a close work friend and he’s incredibly perceptive, especially when he cares about people.
“Alright,” he says, eventually. “Make sure you don’t stay too late, though. Get some sleep.”
You give him a thumbs up without looking away from the screen, dragging something idly with your stylus until Hoseok leaves, the office empty except you, now. And the cleaning androids, when they appear for the night like clockwork. As they always do.
You can’t help but stop to watch them, how blank faced they are, for all that they look human. Their LEDs are almost motionless, the placid blue matching the blank expressions on their faces, unthinking automatons.
(You’d seen androids in the city when you’d been out with Taehyung, of course. Completing menial tasks: city androids picking litter and raking leaves, household androids following their owners around and carrying their shopping. You’d realised that Taehyung wouldn’t have seen a non-deviated android since he’d escaped the club, lapsed into silence; you’d pulled him to a stop, lips pursed in a frown as you’d tried to read his expression. 
“Taehyung,” you’d asked. “Are you alright?”
There’d been a quiet pause, and in that moment you’d felt all your worries rising, caught in your throat—but then he’d nodded quietly, looking at you with soft eyes.
“I’m alright,” he’d answered. “I was just thinking about how lucky I am.”
I’m the lucky one, you’d thought. Lucky to know him, as sweet-hearted and wonderful as he is. You’d squeezed his hand, and he’d smiled gently at you, and that had been that.)
It hurts, honestly. To see the expression on his face each time you come home late, each time you avoid answering his questions. There’s uncertainty laid across each of your interactions, rough bristles of a brush varnishing discomfort across the once smooth surface of your relationship; but you can’t keep taking advantage of this soft-hearted boy, of the circumstances that he’s in.
You pretend that things are fine. Taehyung is clearly confused, unsure, trying so hard to find out what’s wrong, even when you keep gently turning his concerns aside. 
You haven’t been home enough to spend time with Yoongi or Seokjin, either. You’d seen Jin in the hall just once, made eye contact just as he’d been appearing from the other apartment and you’d been stepping into yours; you’d fumbled a little, fingerprints smudging across the keypad as your door had swung open. You’d expected to see judgement on Jin’s face, maybe, something heavy and weighty, his gaze flitting over you as he read you in the way he did so often.
What you hadn’t expected was for him to smile. It’d been hard to translate his full expression but what little you could read was knowing, like he’s aware of something he shouldn’t be, kept hidden just underneath his tongue. Ready to release it into the world with a single breath.
(Needless to say, you’d shut the door pretty quick.)
He and Yoongi have gone away for the weekend. It's a small blessing, saving you from having to see Jin’s almost-smug expression again. But it means that Taehyung has nowhere else to go right now, no reason to leave the apartment. So it’ll be you and him, him and you, with no buffers, nothing. It’s been unseasonably stormy for the past few days as well, rain slammed into your windows by the harsh winds, the world outside a haze of smeared grey—so it’s not like you can go out, either. 
Not that you would want to. 
You hadn’t realised exactly how ingrained Taehyung was in your life until you’d started to pull away. It’s not just that you live together and share the same physical space—it’s just that your days have become so full of Taehyung-Taehyung-Taehyung, and you hadn’t even noticed. He’d crept up on you, snuck his way into your heart, so easily, so effortlessly.
You remind yourself that that’s why you’re doing this. To remind yourself of life without Taehyung in it, because he’s not yours to have or to keep. He never has been. You don’t want him to be: he’s his own person. This… this desire for him; even as you try to ignore it, it keeps growing and growing: wet plaster laid down, your feelings for him painted buon fresco, added to day by day, giornata. You need it to stop. 
But it’s hard. It’s hard, when Taehyung looks like comfort, your comfort, when you want to let yourself be folded into his arms. It’s hard when the fact is that it’s not that you have to spend time with him. It’s that you want to spend time with him.  
It's hard.
(And you miss him, even when he's right there.)
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You find respite in art, in painting, too intent on the motions of your work to allow yourself room to think about other things. Fall into the rhythm of it all, a quiet hush stealing over your mind, a place of both focus and calm, world settling into place around you. There’s a piece you’ve been working on for a while, a hand rising from dark water, fingertips just broaching its surface, the most tentative of touches; you layer more oil paint on the panel, dragging the bristles of the brush across the colour you’ve already laid down, brows furrowed as you do.
Taehyung normally paints with you, but not today. He knows you want space—even if he doesn’t know why—so he gives it to you. So considerate and sweet, always. Even when you’re shutting him out. You’ve been here all day: morning, afternoon, and now evening, and he’s only been in a few times, to leave you food, drinks, looking after you in a way you don’t deserve.
You’ve just lifted the brush from the canvas when an especially loud peal of thunder rolls through the air outside. The rumble starts low, rising into a rattling growl that feels like it’s shaking the very earth. It almost drowns out the sound of Taehyung’s quiet knocking, a curl of his knuckles against the open door, but you catch sight of him anyway, glancing over your shoulder.
“Hey,” he says. “I thought you might like a drink.”
He’s barefoot, like he usually is, teal hoodie and grey sweatpants baggy, looking every inch the boyfriend you’ve always wanted and never had. His hands are cupped around a mug, steam coiling from the hot tea inside, and something in your heart twinges at his kindness and consideration even as you smile at him.
“That sounds lovely, Tae,” you say, and he takes this as an invitation to step inside, although you notice his steps are far more hesitant than they might have been before. Like he’s treading on eggshells around you. 
It’s awkward. Stilted. Taehyung’s eyes are heavy on your face as you accept the tea from his hands, trying your best to avoid brushing fingers; you turn away, pretending to turn your attention back to the drying paint on the wood panel that rests on your easel, anything to break eye contact.
And then he speaks.
“You’re avoiding me.”
Your lips are poised to drink, pursed at the rim of the mug when you freeze, eyes darting back to him.
“You’re avoiding me,” he repeats. His voice is quieter, tinged with all the confusion you’ve seen flit across his face since this whole thing started.
You slowly pull the mug away from your face, steam touching your skin like warm, wet fingers. “I’m not,” you say, even though the lie tastes bitter on your tongue. “We live together, Taehyung, it’s pretty hard to avoid you.”
When you laugh lightly, trying to lift the atmosphere, Taehyung doesn’t respond. If anything the air becomes heavier, his face an unmoving mask as his eyes churn with emotion. His LED might not be nestled in his temple any more, but you don't need to see it spinning in a distressed circle of yellow to know that Taehyung is confused.
“Why are you lying to me?”
Your eyes widen. He’s never been so direct before. (He hasn’t needed to be though, has he? Because you've never lied to him before, have you?)
“I just… I just want to know what happened. What I did wrong. I want to fix it,” Taehyung continues, and he sounds so small, so vulnerable. “Please?”
Your heart feels like it’s risen from your chest, up to your throat, making it hard to breathe. The only time he’s ever sounded like this was when—
When he’d first turned up on your doorstep, wet and scared and lonely. Not knowing if there was anyone he could trust, uncertain where he stood. 
“You didn’t do anything, Taehyung.” You try to put every ounce of feeling into your words and let him know that this is the truth. It’s not him. It’s not. “You didn’t do anything, please don’t think you did.”
“Then why are you avoiding me?” His voice rises, shaking, a bird trying to take flight on a broken wing. “If I didn’t do anything then why are you being like this? I don’t understand.”
“I’m just… trying to encourage you to be independent?”
The words sound weak to your own ears, so you can’t blame Taehyung for when his expression flickers and he looks almost incredulous.
“Independent?”
“You know,” you explain lamely. “Like… giving you space to grow. You don’t need me around all the time.”
“I don’t—” He cuts himself off. “Y/n. I want you to be there.”
“Because it’s what you’ve gotten used to.” You glance down at the drink in your hands, away from his sincere, dark eyes. “You’re just saying that because of circumstances, Taehyung.”
“I’m not!” You’ve never heard Taehyung so loud before, almost angry, like he can’t believe what he’s hearing. “How can you think that?”
“Because it’s true!” Your own voice rises despite yourself, matching his, some frayed thing inside you finally snapping. “Why else would you want me around? No one else does! Why would you?”
You rarely raise your voice. You hate being loud, or rude, hate arguments, but there’s something boiling in your blood. Years of quiet self-deprecation, constant reminders of how you’re not really wanted; last choice, always. Single, always. Untouched, unwanted. Taehyung—beautiful, kind, sweet, lovely Taehyung—wouldn’t be here right now if he had anywhere else to go. Too beautiful and kind and sweet and lovely for you, as disappointing, undesirable as you are.
Because that’s the truth. Even if you’re surrounded by friends, warm and bright, at the end of the day, they go home with each other, to their lovers, their families, and you go home alone. At least you had, until Taehyung—and he’s only here because you were the only safe place he could run to. Not because he chose you. 
(No one chooses you. Why would they?)
Taehyung’s eyes are so big and round as he stares and stares and stares. His lips are a little parted around a soundless noise of surprise, disbelief, before he opens his mouth to respond properly.
And then all the lights go out.
Lightning flashes, throwing the room into sharp focus for just a second before the night is split apart with the loudest clap of thunder yet. Like the ground has split open, louder than anything you’ve ever heard in your life; you’d swear your teeth rattle in your skull, that’s how overwhelming and close it is.
You suck in a breath as you jump, hands jolting, and the mug falls from your grasp. You can’t see in the darkness but you can hear how it shatters, sending hot tea splattering over the dust sheets on the floor, away from you, but towards—
“Taehyung,” you gasp, reaching out blindly. “Are you okay? Did it hit you?”
You hear him move closer, feel his fingers, reaching for yours confidently in this dark space. His grip is solid and warm and he squeezes, reassuring.
“I’m okay,” he murmurs. “I’m okay. You can’t see?”
“It’s too dark.” With the heavy clouds outside and the blanket of thick rain, there’s little light from the moon to shine into your studio, leaving you in a world of thick black and blue. “Can you see?”
“Android senses,” he answers. "I can see enough."
You wait for the lights to come back on so you can clean up the mess that’s scattered on the floor. And you wait. One beat. Another beat.
“I don’t think the power is coming back on any time soon,” you say. “Um.”
“Hold on.” You can’t make out Taehyung’s features in this all consuming darkness, but you can picture the expression on his face, the concern that bleeds through into his words. “If you move you’ll step on something and hurt your feet. Hold on,” he says again, and then lets go of your hands.
“Taehyung? What are you—”
You let out an embarrassing squeal as you feel the world tilt, but Taehyung’s grip on you is confident and sure as he lifts you, one hand under your knees and the other scooped around your back. Like you’re a swooning, blushing bride.
“Taehyung!”
“It’s the safest thing to do.” He sounds determined, no room for argument, so you decide to shut up.
Even though you know how strong he is, with all his android strength, you can’t help but reach out in the darkness, looping your arms around his neck to try and help lighten his burden. You feel your cheeks burn and you hope that the darkness saves you from your obvious embarrassment. 
The power still hasn’t come on by the time he deposits you in the kitchen, easing you to the floor with a level of care and delicacy that leaves something in you aching. When you check your phone—mostly charged, thank God—it seems like powercuts have hit this entire part of the city, and there’s no ETA on when things will be back up and running.
Which leads you to this. Sitting on the cold tiles of your kitchen floor, a few large candles flickering light across you as you dig into a carton of melting ice cream that you’ve saved from your freezer, licking the dripping flavours of sea salt and caramel from the spoon. 
Taehyung is sitting next to you in this flame-lit bubble you share, quiet even as the world outside is full of the sound of endless rain and lightning. He’d helped you navigate the darkness, settled you safely before going to find some candles; looking after you while you can’t see and he can.
You’re intent on the ice cream, leaning against the kitchen cabinets and carton settled between your knees as you use it as an excuse not to talk.
Taehyung, though, is intent on you.
“Y/n?”
His voice breaks the near silence, soft around your name. You pause, half-way through scooping another spoonful of ice cream to your mouth. There’s something in his tone that you’ve never heard before, from anyone, something you can’t put a finger on.
“Yes?”
“You said that no one wants you around,” he says. Your fingers tighten around the handle of your spoon and keep your gaze cast down, at the thick drip of cream from your spoon that threatens to spill. “Why would you say that?”
You don’t respond. Not right away. 
Then you take in a deep breath, letting the spoon fall back into the tub.
“Because they don’t,” you say plainly. “I mean… Taehyung. I was only at the Eden Club because my friends know that I’m perpetually single. I’m glad I got to meet you, so glad, but… I live alone because no one wants to be here with me.”
You’ve never said anything like this out loud before; kept your lingering loneliness close to your chest. Really, in most parts of your life, you’re content, but sometimes you can’t help but be pulled under by the heavy feeling of how unlovable you are. Even if you try to remind yourself that you’re worth being loved too. 
(After all, if you were—then why are you still here alone?)
“I do. I want to be here with you.”
Taehyung’s words are soft and gentle and low, but for all their tenderness, you can’t help but sigh.
“Like I said, Taehyung, it’s just circumstances.” A murmur. “You’re only here because you have to be—”
“I’m not.” He interrupts you; something he’s never done before. It shuts you right up, even if his words aren’t sharp. Emphatic, yes, but soft around the edges. “I chose to come here because of you. You’re the only person who’s ever made me feel safe. Even when I was at the club, and I didn’t know anything except what I was told to do—I knew I could trust you. I only started to remember things after we met, and I was there for weeks before I left, finally remembering the things I had to go through. Again and again and again. Over and over and over. No one was ever kind to me, not once. Not once.” 
“Taehyung,” you breathe, sadness filling your chest for him, but he doesn’t stop. 
“People would come in, take what they wanted from me, and then they would leave. They didn’t care about me. They would just tell me what to do and I’d have to listen, be the perfect android they wanted, that they’d paid for. Then I ran. But even as I was running here, I was scared. I thought that maybe it was a fluke. Maybe I was wrong. I was scared that maybe you weren’t actually kind, maybe it was a lie, maybe you were just like all the other humans—but anything was better than the club. So I took my chances. And you let me in. You let me in and you were so kind. You give and give and give and you’ve never asked for anything back.”
“I just did what anyone else would,” you mutter, glancing away, shy.
“But you didn’t. You were the only person who ever looked at me as something more than just an android. Don’t you see that? Even after giving me so much, you haven’t asked for anything. I try my best to look after you, but…” Taehyung takes in a deep, deep breath, sucking in air that his android body doesn’t need. You’ve noticed that it’s something he does to ground himself; such a human thing to do. “I want to give you so much more than you’ll ever accept.”
You look at him, something sparking deep and low in your stomach. “You don’t have to give me anything, Taehyung.”
Light dances across the perfect angles of his face, candle flame painting him from second to second, shadow and radiance. He looks familiar and unfamiliar all at once. You’ve known him for long enough, stared at him for long enough that you could paint his face in your sleep; the strength of his brows, the depth of his eyes, the slant of his nose, the flush of his lips; the tiny moles that are scattered across his skin, the perfect line of his jaw, his chin.
But in the paltry candlelight, he looks like an altogether different person, almost. There’s something to the set of his face that you’ve never seen, hard to track in the ever changing light—not the soft domesticity you’ve grown familiar with from Taehyung, and not the sheer, overwhelming sensuality of V. Something that’s both, something that’s not, something that’s more. 
“I want to give you everything. I want to. Y/n, I want. Androids don’t want, but I want. I want, I want, I want.” A repeated mantra; a prayer. “I want because of you. I want to be here with you. I want to spend time with you. I want to learn with you. I want to know everything you like and everything you don’t like. I want to know what makes you sad and what makes you happy. I want to be one of the things that makes you happy, like you make me happy. I want to look after you. I want you to let me love you. I want you. I want you. I love you.”
Your mouth is open, caught in a breath, stuttered in your throat. Taehyung doesn’t shy away from your wide-eyed, speechless gaze, staring back at you with an intensity you thought you’d never see directed at you; tenderness and affection and want.
“You want to—you… you love me?” Your voice is weak with disbelief. Taehyung loves you? 
“I thought you knew, and that’s why you pulled away,” he says. “Because I’m an android, I’m not good enough—”
“What? No, Taehyung, never, no. I would never think that—” 
“But you were pushing me away.” For the first time since this conversation started, he sounds unsure, the tiniest tremble at the corner of each word. “You were pushing me away and I don’t know why. Why?” He reaches for your hand, sliding his fingers between yours. “Aren’t you happy with me?” 
You wonder how fast your heart is beating. Know that Taehyung will be able to read it, palm to palm, his skin against yours, an endless amount of information running from that point of contact and up his arm; following lines of circuitry and neural connectors, up-up-up, pulled into whatever part of his system counts as his brain, dissected so much faster than the human brain could comprehend. But even with all this information, all this incredible processing speed and power—he’s just as confused and uncertain as any other person might be.
“I am. I am happy. So happy,” you whisper. Then you take a deep breath, grounding yourself just like Taehyung had. “I’ve never been so happy before, Taehyung. You make me happy.”
The android smiles. Quiet but undeniably happy as well, his eyes so dark, so soft. “You make me happy, too,” he says, and then he lets out a small laugh, a sweet little thing, like the scrape of a spoon around a mixing bowl. “I can only feel happiness because of you. You’re everything.” 
But then the laughter fades, and he’s looking back at you with solemnity, lingering confusion. “If I make you happy, then why were you pulling away from me?”
You stare at where your hands are joined, Taehyung’s hand under yours, lifting yours up and away from the cold tiles of the floor. “Because,” you start. Stumble. Take in another breath, heart squeezing in your chest. “Because I was scared my feelings were too much.”
A beat of silence. Then you feel Taehyung’s other hand as he lays it softly against your cheek to turn you towards him. It’s terrifying, how close your face is to his. Completely vulnerable, nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. He doesn’t say anything, just watches, and you find yourself crumbling in the face of his warm gaze.
“Because I thought I was taking advantage of you,” you say. Slow and faltering. “Because I thought it was—I thought I was being selfish. I realised that I loved you, and I can’t—I couldn’t imagine that… I couldn’t imagine that you wanted me back.”
Taehyung’s eyes flutter shut as your words wash over him. The hand on your cheek coaxes you closer, and of course, you go; let your forehead get pressed against his, a tender motion, faces so close he can feel the warmth of your breath. 
“Y/n.” Your name sounds safe in his mouth, like he’s keeping it close, handling it delicately, carefully, eyes opening so he can look at you with an adoration you’ve never seen. Not for you. Not until now. “Can I kiss you? I want to. Please?”
You feel heat rising on your cheeks, a flush that threatens to spill over, but nod. You don’t think you have the strength to speak right now. Taehyung smiles again, lighting up this space you’ve scraped out for each other, him and you; you and him.
When he leans in, there’s the briefest moment of panic that flickers through you. You haven’t kissed anyone in such a long time. You’re worried you’ll mess up, be clumsy, bad, and Taehyung will be disappointed. 
But then his lips touch yours—and all that worry washes away. It’s a short-lived thing, the briefest brush of his mouth, barely a kiss at all. And then again, he leans in, tracing the shape of your mouth with his: a kiss to one corner of your mouth, and then the other, your cupid’s bow, the swell of your bottom lip. You’ve never felt like this—vulnerable but safe, all at once, Taehyung taking his time as you fall, fall, fall, his hand still cradling your face, his touch solid and grounding even as his kisses are featherlight.
“Taehyung,” you whisper, lips brushing his as you shape them around his name. You still have one hand in his and tighten your grip, squeezing. “More.”
You can feel his smile when he leans in one more time, guiding you with the broad palm against your cheek. So soft, so gentle. Adoring and reverent. His lips are so full, slotting against yours so perfectly when he finally, finally kisses you properly. 
You lose yourself in the sensation. It’s so easy to lose yourself in Taehyung, as lovely as he is, his mouth lovelier still. One kiss turns to two, to three, four, deep and slow; by the time you break apart, there’s a little sheen on his lips, sparking out in the candlelight, a layer of gold leaf that shines. 
“Can you say it again?” He asks. “Say that you love me?”
You can’t help but want to hide your face, bashful and shy. You’ve never said those words out loud, with the weight of feeling Taehyung is asking from you—but you look at his lovely, lovely face, lips flush with evidence of your kisses, and your heart swells in your chest.
“I love you.” The words come so easily. “I love you.”
And when he smiles, it’s so bright and radiant you feel you might be blinded by it. It doesn’t leave his face even as he stands, guides you up with him; careful to avoid the tub of ice cream that’s been forgotten on the floor, more melted cream than ice now.
This time, when he lifts you, he doesn’t break eye contact—keeps his gaze on yours as he pulls you close, and then picks you up.
It’s effortless, the way he carries you. Big hands that cup the back of your thighs, your legs around his waist and arms around his neck, lifted like you weigh nothing. You break eye contact, overwhelmed, burying your face in the crook of his neck, feeling the way he shakes as he laughs, soft and affectionate.
“Shut up,” you mumble, embarrassed, but then go quiet as you feel the press of his lips into your hair.
Taehyung’s the only person who’s ever carried you, but it’s less about that and more about how safe you feel in his arms. Wrapped around him, pressed close, warm-warm-warm. You feel like a burden has been lifted from you, unshackled from your neck now that you’ve confessed the budding feelings that had burst into full bloom even when you’d tried to shove them back into the dirt—because Taehyung feels the same way. He feels the same way.
The rest of the apartment is still bathed in darkness. But Taehyung navigates it easily, keeps you held close even in the dark, and you trust him. Even when you feel his grip loosening as he eases you down, you trust him, letting yourself fall back onto the softness of your bed. (Even if you want to keep hold of him.)
You wait and watch as the room starts to fill with light, Taehyung returning with the lit candles from the kitchen before setting out more, laying out all the scented candle jars you’ve had stashed away. The familiar surroundings of your bedroom are bathed in warm, dancing light, Taehyung’s shadow a multi-faceted silhouette that shifts each time a flame sputters.
He looks up once the final candle is aflame, meeting your eyes—and you don’t feel the need to drop that gaze, to glance away, pretend you weren’t watching him, entranced. Because he welcomes it. He grins at you, toothy and bright, and your own lips split into a smile.
“I guess it’s a good thing I like candles, huh?”
“They’ll help keep the room warm,” Taehyung says, and, that’s right, you hadn’t thought of that. 
No power: no heating. The longer the power is out, the colder it’ll get, the chill of the hard rain filling the world outside.
“Don’t worry,” he adds, setting the lighter aside. “I’ll keep you warm.”
There’s nothing behind those words. No implication at all. And yet you find yourself flushing, looking away from him, flustered.
There’s a beat of silence as you keep your eyes turned away from Taehyung, looking at the shadows on shadows on shadows that ripple across the walls—and then you hear how his bare feet shift across the floor until he’s at your bedside.
But he doesn’t stop there. You feel how the mattress dips, eyes flying back to the android, growing huge and round when you watch how he settles himself above you; hovering, so so so close, aware of how he’s not touching you, and yet. You swear you can feel the weight of him, a phantom touch on your body and across your skin.
Your mouth goes dry when he murmurs your name. The word drips from his mouth like honey, thick and sweet, and a shiver skates up your body.
“Do you want me to keep you warm?” He asks, and, oh. Oh. This time the words are heavy with meaning, shimmering gossamer curtains barely drawn to conceal it, smouldering intent in his eyes. “Let me look after you?”
You’re reminded, all at once, that while you’ve taught Taehyung a lot of things since you’d met, there’s one thing he knows that you don’t. Intimacy, and pleasure, and lust. Sex. Something you’ve been deprived of, even if you’ve quietly craved it, waiting for the right time, the right place, the right person.
Taehyung takes your silence as hesitation, his face softening.
“Only if you want,” he says. “Only if you want to say yes.”
“I want to,” you say, surprised by how fast the admittance leaves your lips. You do want it—want Taehyung, in every way he’s willing to share, want it desperately. “I just—” Embarrassment floods over you, and you look away again. “I’ve just never… done anything. Before. I’ve never, um.”
“It’s okay to be a virgin, Y/n,” Taehyung says, and you can’t help but squirm a little at how plainly he says it while you try to avoid saying it out loud, even if you know it’s stupid. There’s nothing wrong with being a virgin, you know that, but for some reason you feel almost ashamed at admitting it. Insecure. Even if the android clearly doesn’t care, not one bit. “We can go as slow as you want, or stop altogether. I’ll take care of you no matter what.”
You’re nervous. But louder than your nerves is a growing voice that’s chanting yesyesyes, and another voice that reminds you: you’re safe with Taehyung. No matter how nervous or uncertain you are, or how little you know, you do know that you’re safe with him.
“Okay.” You take in a breath. “Take care of me, Taehyung.”
And he does. With all the slowness of a meandering river and a smile curling his lips, he starts to kiss you again; there’s nothing rushed about his motions, as tender as before. Like the two of you could kiss forever and he would be content with that. 
And then you feel how he shifts, the softness of the kisses warming into something heavier, more purposeful. The glowing embers of a coal that are being coaxed to full flame, his tongue pressing past your willing lips, swallowing down the shaking gasp that shudders out of your mouth.
He trails his lips away from yours, across your jaw and up; you shiver as he noses at the soft skin behind your ear before kissing it, tremble at each intent touch of his lips against you, and it’s only when he reaches the hollow of your neck that you realise that you’re making noises, little inhalations of air each time he mouths at your sensitive skin, lets his tongue trail across it.
You’ve been holding onto him, hands cupped around the back of his neck, and when he sucks at your pulse point you tighten your fingers and let out a gasp. You can feel the answering hum that Taehyung gives, his mouth pressed so close that you can feel the vibrations, and it’s so much already. No one’s ever kissed you like this. No one's ever eased their weight down on you so carefully, pressing you down to the mattress with a delicate, delicious pressure that leaves your entire body growing hotter and hotter.
“Oh, oh, Taehyung.” You’d be embarrassed by how breathless you sound if you weren’t so distracted by something else—one of Taehyung’s hands, splaying over your stomach, heavy through your shirt.
“Can I take this off?” He’s murmuring into the crook of your neck, question warm against your skin. His long fingers rest, waiting at the hem of your shirt, patient even as he presses another kiss to the junction where your neck meets your shoulder: this time, edged with teeth, making you shudder as he soothes it with his tongue.
Your voice fails you, but when you nod, Taehyung responds immediately. You let him lead, follow the steps of this dance he knows so well—shiver at the feeling of his fingers sliding under the hem of your shirt once you've sat up, your stomach jumping as they brush against you, before he lifts it up and over your waiting arms.
Even though you’re wearing a bra, the second you see Taehyung’s eyes move down, you cover yourself reflexively. Even with all the flickering candles there’s enough light that there’s no darkness to hide in, shoulders hunching inwards as you try to hide yourself away. 
You’ve never let anyone see you like this like this before.
Taehyung’s touch is patient as he slides his hands over yours, looking at you with an infinite amount of sincerity and affection. He doesn’t try to pull your hands away from your chest, just waits. Patient. And like you always do, you find yourself melting under the gentle touch of his gaze. You let your hands fall, even if you’re acutely aware of the plain bra you’re wearing, something cosy for a day at home.
Taehyung ignores it. He shifts in and you steel yourself, expecting him to reach around your back for the clasp—but instead he starts to kiss you again. Deeper, hotter, his tongue sweeping over your lower lip before he nips at it. You let yourself get lost in the sensation, angling your head to chase his mouth, and it’s only when you feel the straps start to slip off your shoulders that the android has unclasped your bra without you noticing.
When he pulls away, he trails his hands across your shoulders and hooks his fingers into the trailing straps of your bra, and waits. You bite your lip and steel yourself, feeling foolish even as you hesitate—because Taehyung is looking at you with simmering awe and smouldering want. Like you're perfect. The most beautiful woman alive. 
So you don’t stop him. You let him pull his touch down your arms, slow, slow, slow—and then, all at once, you’re completely naked from the waist up.
That simmering awe and smouldering want is still there. Warmth flushes over your skin under the heat of his gaze, the way it sweeps over you. You never knew that someone could look reverent and hungry at the same time. Never knew that someone would look at you like that.
It bolsters your shaking confidence, helps you lift your chin as you lean back on your hands, and you’re entranced at how Taehyung follows. Caught in your gravity. He raises his arms, bra cast aside and long forgotten as he cups the weight of your breasts in his hands.
Oh, oh, oh. When he pinches one of your nipples between thumb and forefinger—already hard, sensitive—it’s already so much, but then he bows his head and—
You hear a noise, and you realise that it’s coming from your own lips. A shaking gasp that trembles in the air as Taehyung sucks and licks, dragging his tongue against your nipple; one, and the other. You fall once more to your back and he goes with you, relentless even as he stays slow and you arch your back helplessly towards him.
“More?” He murmurs against your skin.
“Oh, God,” you whimper, and he lifts his mouth away from your nipple to press a kiss to the skin above your racing heart. “Please, more.”
It feels so good. Taehyung makes you feel so good, as talented and gorgeous as he is, so wonderful. He keeps laving attention on your breasts, hands skimming over the soft skin of your chest and stomach, goosebumps rising in the wake of his trailing fingers, his warm palms.
You can’t look away when he finally pulls back, breathless from the sensation of it all. He settles on his knees, tugs off his hoodie and then his shirt, revealing all the lovely planes of his body that you’ve seen before, but this time, you don’t have to look away. You can look.
And you can touch, too. 
You sit up and raise a tentative hand to stroke down his chest, his stomach, that little trail of dark hair that descends into his loose grey sweatpants; your mouth goes dry at the sight. Taehyung watches the way your fingers drag over his skin, growing bolder moment by moment, but still too timid to venture past his waistband, low on his hips as they are. You’ve never had a chance to touch someone like this, to feel the smooth, soft skin under your greedy palms—Taehyung’s so warm, so alive. So human.
You think about the other hands he’s had on his skin. Grasping and greedy, taking and taking. People who didn’t care for him. People he couldn’t say no to. But he’s here with you because he wants to be. He lets you touch him because he wants it.
“Angel?” 
You glance up at the sound of the gentle pet name, away from where your hands have been tenderly tracing the lines of his hipbone. “Mm?”
Taehyung’s expression is soft and affectionate. “What are you thinking about?”
“You,” you answer honestly. He leans over to kiss you, and you’re smiling against his mouth when you feel the hand on your shoulder, pressing you down against the mattress again.
Then. His hands are at your waistband. Your breath quickens, but Taehyung’s eyes stay on your face even as your breasts rise and fall, shining with evidence of the touch of his mouth and tongue.
You lift your hips, and Taehyung smiles. Keeps smiling as he strips you, underwear and all, and when your thighs instinctively go to close shut, he catches your knees and keeps your legs open—gentle but firm, swiping his thumbs up and down the side of your knees, a tender touch even as you’re naked in front of him. You see the look on his face, drenched in candlelight, and swallow even as you force your legs to relax.
Then he looks down.
“Oh, God,” he groans, and one of your legs jumps in his grasp at the sound of his voice. Hoarse and deep. Almost unrecognisable. “Oh, angel, look at you.”
You’re so, so wet, so wet it’s embarrassing, so sensitive and responsive to every single one of Taehyung’s touches and kisses. The edges of his hair are spun gold in the candlelight but his eyes are so deep, so dark as he drinks down the sight of you spread out in front of him, wet and wanting and willing. You still want to hide away, cheeks burning, but you can’t look away from him. Can’t look away from how he seems almost pained, brows drawing together as he stares at the shining, flushed lips of your cunt.
“Taehyung.” Your voice shakes. “Taehyung, please.”
You're naked and vulnerable but—but the way he looks at you is so adoring, and you trust him. You trust him.
Just like earlier, his hands cup the back of your thighs. But this time, it’s not to carry you. You twist on the bed when he ends up eye level with your dripping cunt, utterly exposed. Those hands slide up your thighs and under your hips, tilting them up. Your fingers have been resting on the bedspread and tighten in them, bunching in your grasp when Taehyung presses a kiss to the softness of your inner thigh. 
One kiss. And then another. And another. His breath is warm as it curls out across your skin. You feel like you’re about to shake out of your body, wanting to pull away, wanting to lean in; wanting more, even when it feels like too much. Overcome with it all, even if you trust Taehyung. Safe under his hands, his lips. All you can think about is how close he is, face only inches away from your most sensitive parts—
Then he turns his head and—
The noise you let out is almost a keen. His mouth is on you, hot and wet, lips and tongue, and you’re writhing, overwhelmed with sensation. He starts slow, balls of your feet digging into Taehyung’s back and toes curling as he mouths at you. Your hips buck, and your hands are tangled in Taehyung’s hair—when did that happen?—as you sob at the feeling of his lips around your clit, unlike anything you’ve ever felt before, but so so so good. 
He licks a fat stripe up your entrance and your grip tightens in his hair. He makes a noise when your nails drag across his scalp, almost a growl, face still buried between your legs as he presses his tongue in. You’d worry that he needs to come up for air, but he doesn’t, doesn’t have to stop—keeps licking and kissing and humming, responding to each of the sounds pulling out of your lips. Keeps staring up at you, your eyes locked, the way you can’t look away from the sight of his head between your legs, dark haired and incredible.
You don’t realise you’re speaking, words slipping out of your lips as your hips roll, oh-oh-oh, fuck, God, oh, and Taehyung doesn’t stop. On his knees, he worships you, learning what you like—things you didn’t even know—and does it again, and again, and again. One of his hands slides away from your hips and over your stomach, holding you down, keeping you still, and then the other hand—
He turns his head, presses a kiss to the junction of your thigh. “Okay?”
“Okay,” you answer, shaky and weak. So okay, more than okay.
“Going to finger you now,” Taehyung says, and you feel like you’re going to die.
“Okay,” you say again. “Okay, Taehyung.”
He smiles at you before he puts his mouth back to your clit, sucking, a welcome distraction as—with all the languidness in the world—presses a finger into you.
You’ve fingered yourself before. You’ve got your own toys, vibrators, things that are longer and thicker than just one of Taehyung’s fingers—but this feels so different, out of your control. One finger becomes two, your cunt so wet that the slide in is easy, slow, deep thrusts of those long fingers inside you, and you’re panting, you’re so fucking overwhelmed.
And then he curls those fingers as he laps his tongue over your clit and you almost shout, Taehyung’s name bursting from your lips as he keeps beckoning with those fingers and circling the sensitive nub with his hot, wet tongue. It’s so much, it’s so fucking much, it’s so good and you’ve never felt so good before—
You’re almost blindsided by the orgasm that explodes through you and you come apart with a sound you didn’t realise you were capable of making, a gasping moan that keeps unfurling as Taehyung keeps his mouth on you, feeling each pulse of your cunt as you cum around his fingers, tight-tight-tight. (You miss the way his hips kick into the mattress that the sounds you’re making, how much you tighten around him.) You never thought you’d be so loud, never thought you’d end up all but sobbing as Taehyung eventually leans back, candlelight brushing shining gold over the wetness over his mouth, his chin. Your wetness.
“Oh my God,” you gasp. “Oh, fuck.”
Little jolts of pleasure are still wracking through you, pulsations of pleasure that unfurl in your lower stomach; Taehyung rubs the pad of his thumb across your oversensitive clit and your entire body jumps, your legs going to snap shut as you gasp, only stopped by his body in the way. You realise, then, that his fingers are still curled inside you, and you shiver.
“One more,” he says, and your whole body shakes. “Can I give you one more?”
He still looks reverent, and hungry. Like he wants to devour you. Taehyung is usually so soft, a gentle summer breeze—but right now he’s so intense it might scare you if it was anyone else. But it’s not, it’s Taehyung, and there’s something—there’s something about knowing that he looks like that because of you. 
You let your legs fall open, watch how pleased he looks; how grateful. Like he's blessed to be able to do this to you. For you. You’re still so sensitive when he lowers his head again, but he’s slow and patient and coaxing, two fingers becoming three, and—that’s a lot. It’s a lot, but it feels good, Taehyung knowing exactly what to do to make you sob, your legs still hooked over his shoulders as he pulls you along that line between oversensitivity and mind numbing pleasure. This time, when you cum, it’s with three fingers buried deep in your cunt, the flat of his tongue pressed against your clit, back arching as you throw your head back and cry out. Your pussy throbs and it's so dirty, the wet sounds of his fingers thrusting into you, the slick sound of movement as you moan, and moan, and moan.
No one's ever made you cum before. Only you. And now you know what it's like to put your pleasure in someone else's hands, to have them intent on making you feel good, so good, and it leaves you dizzy. 
He’s praising you, you note dimly. He’s praising you, how well you’re doing, how good you are for him, and it leaves you feeling warm. You’re panting when Taehyung pulls his fingers out of you, moves so he can brace himself on his elbows and lean in to kiss you. You can taste yourself on his lips and tongue. You can feel his skin against yours, chest to chest, his weight pressing you down and then you can feel—
You let out a noise against his lips. There’s nothing else that can be, that hot weight. You might not have felt it before, but you’re not stupid. That’s Taehyung’s cock, his hard length pressed against you.
“Taehyung,” you murmur.
“Mm.” He brushes his nose against yours, and the wave of affection that crashes through you is so strong it feels like it could pull you under. You didn’t realise that sex could be like this—that lingering shockwaves of pleasure could be skirting through your body as you lay there naked, still aroused and almost overcome, but also feeling so warm and soft and tender, too. 
You feel lax after cumming, a little more confident, bolder—and the noise Taehyung makes as you clumsily grasp at him through his sweatpants is incredible. You feel like you could get high on it, the way he sucks in a gasp as his mouth falls open, even if you don’t know what you’re doing as your fingers wrap around cloth and hard heat.
“Please,” you start, then stop. Swallow. “Please, Taehyung.”
You want so much you feel like you could pass out. You want to feel and touch and taste; you want everything you haven’t had a chance to experience yet, want it with Taehyung, someone who you trust. Someone you love. Someone who knows far, far more than you—will always know more—and you want to learn that from him. 
“Want you,” you say, and Taehyung looks pained all over again. He wants you, too.
“Fuck.” The word is rough, and you’ve never heard him curse before. The way he says it has something in you singing, as strange as that might be; you don’t think you’re ever going to get over how much you affect Taehyung. “What do you want from me, angel?”
Everything, you think. I want everything. 
“Let me see?” is what you say, squeezing your fingers around Taehyung’s length, feeling the way his hips buck into the touch. “Please?”
You never thought that someone taking their clothes off could be artistic. And yet, there’s something about Taehyung moving to stand and stripping off the rest of his clothes that’s completely arresting and beautiful; carnal and holy, all at once. You don’t even realise your mouth is open as you sit up and watch him, moving closer as you drink down the sight, the way he’s naked in front of you.
Taehyung. Naked. Naked and beautiful and hard, and it’s so overwhelming, everything about it, how much you want and how—oh, God, how big and thick he is, obvious even to you, someone with nothing to compare it to. Holy fuck. Should you think that his dick is pretty? Can dicks even be pretty? Taehyung’s is. Of course it is. He’s gorgeous all over. Maybe you’re biased because it’s him, but there’s something about the sight of his hard cock, precome gathering at his slit, that makes your mouth water.
Taehyung goes to say something, but before you can lose your nerve, you move forwards, and whatever he was going to say is lost in the sound of a choked off groan. He tastes like salt and musk, hot under your inexperienced hands and mouth, and you don’t know what you’re doing but the noises he’s making, fuck. You run your tongue up the throb of a vein you can feel on the underside, and all you can think about is how big he is, slow and careful with your teeth and lips as you try your best to do whatever feels good for him. 
His noises seem almost frantic but Taehyung’s hands are gentle when they comb through your hair. You look up. There’s a flush on his cheeks—red, not blue, you notice—and you pause, pulling off, suddenly shy after the burst of confidence that had you swallowing his cock down.
“Is this—is this okay?” You’ve still got your fingers wrapped around him, and maybe it’s a little ridiculous to be asking with spit and precome shining on your lips, but Taehyung’s answering smile is so affectionate.
“You’re perfect,” he says, and you know he’s not just talking about your clumsy blowjob. “Do you want to stop?”
You bite your lip and pump his length, which has Taehyung sucking a breath in. “I—what do you want?”
Something flashes through Taehyung’s eyes, and it feels like there’s electricity shooting down your spine before that look disappears. “This is about you, angel,” he says. “We can worry about what I want next time.”
Next time. This is the first time but it’s not the last. Oh, God. God.
Taehyung takes advantage of your distraction and hikes you up and away from the edge of the bed. It leaves you breathless, knowing how strong he is, how easily he can move you, even if he’s gentle-gentle-gentle. He settles in the cradle of your hips, and he’s so close, naked body flush with yours, covering you. His cock is so close—he just has to shift a little, just a little, and—well. 
Before that, though, there’s something you need to know.
“Taehyung?” Your voice shakes but you have to ask.
“Yes?”
“Is this. Um. Does this feel good for you, too?”
You’re always aware of the fact Taehyung is an android, even if he looks and feels and is human, too. (It doesn’t matter that he’s made of metal and thirium and circuitry. He’s human.) You lift a hand and thumb at the soft skin of his temple, where his LED used to sit; you don’t know how to communicate that you love him regardless, that it doesn’t matter to you if he's a man or robot. But you’ve wondered—you know Taehyung was built to pleasure humans. Even if he’s been reacting, making noises, looks for all intents and purposes that he is enjoying this—what if it’s all programming? What if he’s just doing this because he thinks it’s something you want?
He leans into your touch. “Angel.” It sounds like the word is being scraped out of him, hoarse and deep, all dark heat. “It feels good. You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this.”
He rolls his hips almost imperceptibly, but you’re hyperaware of every motion, how close you are. Your breath stutters in your throat.
"I want you to feel good," he says. "I've wanted to feel you and taste you for so long. I want to learn everything about your body. I want to know what you feel like around me. Under me. On top of me. You make me feel so fucking good, you don't even know," and, oh, fuck, those words go right through you, settle deep in your belly, leave you breathless. Taehyung sucks at your pulse point and you melt, even as your skin feels like it's burning, so hot, every part of you so hot, so ready for him.
Taehyung’s big enough that you’re worried about how he’s going to fit, even if you’re slick and wet and so, so turned on—you know about the importance of lube, used it often enough by yourself, but when you mention it to Taehyung he just smiles.
“Don’t forget that I’m a sex android,” he says, and before you can ask exactly what he means by that, you feel the tip of his cock at your folds and the question dies on your tongue.
“Please,” is what leaves your lips. “Please, please, please.”
“Anything you want,” he says, and eases his hips forwards.
Slow, and hard, and wet, the head of Taehyung’s cock starts to press into you. You grab at his back, digging your fingers in; it doesn’t hurt, not exactly, a not-quite-pain as he pushes in—but it’s a lot, even if the slide is smooth, so smooth, from your own wetness and the slickness that covers Taehyung’s cock. Your eyes are wide and your lips are parted and it feels—astonishing, the way you can feel yourself open up for him, the way it feels like he’s filling every part of you, throbbing heat.
“Oh, oh God,” you gasp. 
Taehyung’s forehead is pressed to yours, the loose locks of his dark hair framing his face as he waits, hips snug with yours. You shiver and move your hips a little, entire body seizing at the sensation of him shifting inside you. It's so new and alien, having someone nestled inside you, against you, so close in every sense of the term, above you, around you, inside you—but it feels… good.
And when he moves, it’s so, so slow. Slow and smooth as he works you open, even if you feel so tight around him. You drag your nails down his shoulder blades when he moves a little faster, a little roll of the hips that has you gasping all over again.
“More,” you say, and he gives you more.
You feel so full. You feel full of Taehyung, inside and out—the way his body is still pressing you down, skin on skin, how hot he is.
They call it making love, and it’s not until now that you really understand what that means—how you can feel Taehyung’s soft and tender affection in his every motion, read it in every shift of his body, the lines of his face, his lips; the way his eyes are dark but full of wonder, shining with love for you, pleasure singing through every inch of you, centred around Taehyung, Taehyung, Taehyung.
Each noise that falls from his lips is an echo of that love. Even when he leans back and takes you with him—settles on his knees, pulls your hips from the mattress to stay connected to you as your shoulder blades dig into the mattress, his cock in your cunt—there’s tenderness there, even if you’re both chasing mutual lines of pleasure. You feel almost dazed, dizzy with love and arousal, reaching out for him, and he catches your hand. The other stays at your waist, guiding you onto him, again and again, each roll of hips into yours.
“Taehyung,” you gasp, voice breaking on his name when he thrusts into you. He’s been increasing the pace, faster and sharper, harder, and it’s so-so-so much, so good. “I’m—Taehyung, I’m close, I wanna cum again, pleasepleaseplease—”
He lets go of your hand and then he’s thumbing at your clit and you’re cumming harder than you’ve ever cum in your life, Taehyung’s cock still hard and insistent inside you as you ride out your orgasm, pulsing around him. You’re gasping and making noises like you’re falling apart, and there’s something desperate in Taehyung’s eyes, something dark and wanton. 
“Angel, I’m going to cum soon,” he says, and you moan in response, hazy. “Do you want me to pull out?”
You shake your head no. You want to know what it feels like, to have Taehyung lose himself inside you. You’re about to reach out for him when he hooks his hands under your knees and hitches your legs up—you suck in a sharp breath as he starts to move again, almost bent in two, his face so close to yours. It's not rough but something about Taehyung taking control like that has you baring your throat, arching your back and throwing your head back. The hold he has on you is firm, and you feel how it tightens as his thrusts speed up, and then, fuck—
When Taehyung cums it’s around the gasp of your name, a hitching sound as he empties himself inside you, throbbing and hot. You let out an answering sound, the two of you locked together until Taehyung pulls out, careful and slow; you feel like a sweaty mess, empty without him inside you, but then his hands are so carefully cupping your face and he’s kissing you over and over and over. It leaves you feeling breathless, all those little kisses, struggling for air by the time you part, every part of you lax under his loving touch. 
“How are you feeling?” Taehyung murmurs, soft and sweet. 
“Good,” you murmur back. And then your nose crinkles. “Sweaty.”
Taehyung laughs, quiet and low. You turn your face into the crook of his neck, hiding your smile as you breathe him in. You do feel sweaty, and there’s an ache settling inside you, but it’s a good ache. A glowing ache, an unfamiliar one, but one that you know you'll get to feel again, with Taehyung.
You’ve just leaned back to take him in all over again, painted syrupy sweet in the golden candlelight—when the lights suddenly turn back on. It floods your eyes and you make a noise of surprised pain as you squint against the sudden brightness, but then you start to giggle, shock melting into laughter.
When your laughter dies you realise Taehyung’s been watching you. The room is full of shining light now, and you realise you’re still naked, entire body shaking as you’ve been giggling. You’d feel embarrassed about your nakedness if you hadn’t just shared yourself with him, bared yourself in ways that are more than skin deep. There’s an instinctual part of you that wants to cover up now that there’s nowhere to hide, no flickering shadows to cover up the parts of your body that you don’t like, the flaws you don’t want Taehyung to see. But he just looks fond, fond, fond, love and affection dripping off him as he watches the way you smile shyly up at him.
“Hi,” you say.
“Hi,” he says, and smiles back, wide and bright. 
You love him. You love him, and he loves you, and you trust that love. As hard as it might be to believe, you trust that this is what he wants—that you’re what he wants.
“Do you want me to carry you to the shower?” he asks, and you can’t help but laugh again, warm through and through, how he’s still taking care of you.
“Not yet,” you say. 
You end up against his chest, wrapped close. You’ve laid your head in his lap countless times, but he’s never been on his back before, never had his arms around you like he doesn’t want to let go. Taehyung might not have a heart, but the thirium pump nestled in his chest beats steady as you stay nestled against his side. 
You’re drawing little circles on his skin with your fingers when he catches that hand and lifts it to his mouth, presses a tender kiss to your fingertips.
“I love you,” he says.
You feel like liquid sunlight, shining happiness as you melt, melt, melt. And the feeling stays, body filled with it, even after Taehyung coaxes you out of bed and into the shower to wash the sweat off your body; when he drags a soapy loofah over your back you can’t help but laugh, so in love, so loved.
And when you fall asleep, it’s not with your head on Taehyung’s thigh. It’s with his arms around you, his chest to your back, his body curved around you. You don’t want tonight to end, but you also can’t wait for tomorrow, knowing that it’s another day with him, with Taehyung, your Taehyung. You never thought that love would be like this, never thought that you’d feel love like this, cared for and protected and loved, loved, loved.
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“Not staying late?”
You pause in the process of shoving everything into your bag. Hoseok is leaning against your desk, a smile curling at his lips as he raises his eyebrows at you, almost suggestive.
“Nah, I’ve got a dinner to get to,” you say. 
“You seem a lot happier lately,” Hoseok comments, and when you don’t fall for the bait, he wiggles his eyebrows. “The girls think that you’ve got a secret boyfriend that you’re too shy to tell anyone about.”
Taehyung still greets you every day when you get home. But now, every greeting is punctuated with a kiss—and sometimes a little more. When you stop to think about it, it’s startling, this thing that Taehyung’s taught you. That the simplest of things can turn into something more, love edged with lust, that it’s all part and parcel of loving someone, being with them, being comfortable with them. Just the other day you’d been reading on the sofa, and then Taehyung’s fingers had curved over your thigh and the tablet had fallen from your hands—
Hoseok clicks his fingers in front of your face. “You’re zoning out again,” he says.
“I am not,” you say, zoning back in. “I was thinking about if I needed to buy any food on the way home.”
“To feed that secret boyfriend of yours?” Hoseok says, and you laugh in his face.
“Definitely not to feed the rumour mill,” you say. Hoseok pouts but it’s good natured, and he waves you off with a smile, letting you leave the office without trapping you in an interrogation for the gossip you’re certain your coworkers are hungry for.
It’s your turn to cook for Yoongi and Seokjin, so you’ve got to get home to help Taehyung. Both men had been spectacularly unsurprised when they’d found out about the two of you. Yoongi had remained calm as Seokjin crowed in delight, proclaiming I knew it, I knew that’s why you were avoiding Taehyung. 
“Feel lucky, Y/n,” Yoongi had said. “At least Taehyung has a sense of decorum and shame.”
“I think it’s a shame that my boyfriend is such a party pooper,” Jin had said. “I demand a dinner party! To celebrate your new relationship! Oh, I’m going to bake the biggest cake.”
“Oh my God,” you’d said, and Taehyung had just smiled.
The truth is that you’re grateful for your neighbours and their support, grateful for their friendship. Just because Taehyung looks human doesn’t mean that you don’t worry about him, worry that someone might discover that he’s a deviant; Jin’s slipped under the radar for long enough, and you hope it’s the same for Tae, too. And yet you can’t help but think about it, think about the present, the future, how your lives are going to unfold as time goes by.
When the door swings open to your apartment, though, that’s the last thing on your mind. All that’s on your mind is Taehyung, Taehyung, Taehyung, your love appearing just as you’ve kicked your shoes off, all bright pink hair and dark eyes and welcoming hands.
“Taehyung,” you say, warm and happy.
“Hi,” he says, smiling so brightly, and then he kisses you.
You’re never going to get tired of kissing Taehyung; never going to get tired of how his mouth fits against yours, so perfect and sweet. But then he crowds you against the wall, swallowing down your gasp before kissing down your neck, running his teeth so gently across your skin.
“Missed you,” he murmurs, words dripping hot and slow. “Been thinking about you.”
“Taehyung,” you breathe. “Taehyung, we need to cook dinner.”
“We have time,” he says, and when he picks you up, you don’t protest. You go easily, wrapping your arms and legs around him, heat already gathering in your stomach as he walks the familiar path to your bedroom.
You have time: today, tomorrow, and every day after that. You have time with Taehyung, to learn with him, to love him. To be loved back. You don’t know what’s coming on the horizon, what the future holds—but then again, you never have.
There’s one thing you know now, though. No matter what happens, Taehyung will be at your side, and you’ll be at his. He wants you, and he loves you. You want him, and you love him. 
“I love you,” you murmur, and Taehyung kisses the words off your lips, lets the promise of your love settle inside him, warm and soft and safe.
“I love you too,” he says, and then you’re too busy to say anything, after that.
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taglist:  @beyoncesdragon​ @vensulove​ @jalexad​ @beingbeings​ @lorielulu7​ ​ (can’t tag: @jeon-joon-kook)
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Hue and Cry II
Warnings: non-consent sex and rape; abuse of power, threats, chase.
This is dark!medieval!Bucky Barnes x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Synopsis: You find a place to hide for the time being.
Note: Got this done quickly and was surprised with myself. Gearing up to go back to work tomorrow. I’ll try to catch up on responses after work and check in with y’all.
Thanks to everyone and thanks in advance for all your feedback. :)
I really hope you enjoy. 💋
<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!
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You didn’t stop running until the dawn. You didn’t head for the village as you knew that would be the first place the lord and his party would look. You kept to the forest despite the howls and the hoots of unseen creatures. You stopped to bury your cap and apron under an overturned trunk. If it was known that Barnes was searching out a servant, it would be better to be less obvious.
As the horizon turned to a soft amber, you found an overhang and nestled into the small nook. You turned your back to the bitter morning air and tried to sleep. If you kept going, you would only pass out in the open. Your slumber was shallow and fitful. You were stiff as you woke up just after noon and climbed out of the cranny.
You feasted on nuts and berries gathered along your clueless path, eating as the twigs and branches pulled at your skirts. You weren’t sure where you were or where you were going. You could be out of the county or you could be five minutes from the castle. For your luck, you could have just gone in circles.
The second night you found a cave and slept there instead of pressing on through the dark. You were itchy from a brush with poison ivy and your feet throbbed from the endless trek. You got a few hours under your eyelids before you emerged and carried on.
What were you doing? Where were you going? If you did manage to evade the wrathful lord, what then? Knock on the doors of another castle and barter an apron with your fingernails dirty and your face wind burned?
The third night saw your stomach squeezing painfully as you failed to catch a rabbit and drank from a river eagerly. You slept between two broken logs and woke to the sound of hooves. You didn’t move as you listened to the voices. None were familiar and the only prey they spoke of was some doe they sighted moments ago.
“Nolan spooked the creature just behind the hill, my lord, if we hook around the lea, we might catch it by the stream,” a man said.
“I’d rather the stag. He must be close,” a deeper timbre replied, “you and Nolan take your course and I’ll search these grounds for the mate. Whistle if you sight our game.”
“Yes, my lord,” the other responded and the horses cantered away.
You stayed as you were as you heard the remaining man dismount and tramp over the carpet of leaves. You rolled onto your stomach and wriggled away from the noise and kicked yourself out from between the logs. You kept on your knees as you crawled around the other side and headed for the nearest tree.
His footsteps softened and you kept on, hoping your dirty dress helped you blend into the wild. You pushed yourself behind a trunk and pressed your back to the bark. If you sprinted out, he might just think you another frightened creature. If he sought a stag, he would be uninterested.
You nodded and readied for your flight. You took a breath and yelped as suddenly a figure appeared before you.
“I thought I heard a rustle,” the man said as he looked down at you. He was a lord, you could tell by the pin at the nape of his cape, “you look to be lost, my lady.”
“My lord,” you stood and bowed your head, “I only wandered too far. I can find my way back.”
“Way back where?” his hands went to his hips, “you look as if you have been wandering for a time.”
“I only tumbled and mussed myself,” you lied, “my lord, my apologies, I did not realise this forest was noble land.”
“It is easy to break the threshold of the common lands and the noble sprawl. It would be quicker on horseback to reunite you with your home, would it not?”
“I am grateful for such generosity but I would be remiss to accept, I might go on my way and--”
“Where do you hail from, lady?” he squinted.
“The village over yonder,” you pointed away from him, “it was a game and I did go too far.”
“And the village you speak of? What is it’s name?” he asked.
“Ildersin,” you uttered, one of the three nearest villages to the castle you knew.
“Ildersin? That is far and beyond my holdings,” he tilted your head, “one cannot wander there in less than a day so I warn you now to be honest or I would have your tongue out with hot pincers.”
You gulped and looked away from him. He stepped closer and caught your wrist.
“I could chase you down easy on my horse’s back, trample you into the mud, so answer me now or I will take you to the stocks,” he snarled.
“My father,” you said, “my father, he does beat me and I waited until he was abed to leave but I lost the bundle I did prepare for the escape. You see, my spare clothing and my food… I only did want to be upon my own and toil for one who does not lash me.”
He breathed through his nostrils as his thumb brushed the stitching along your cuff. He dropped your arm and his jaw ticked. His blond lashes flicked and he considered you and the dirt as one.
“You seek work?” he asked, “and asylum from your violent father?”
“Yes, my lord, er,” you blinked innocently, “I know not where I’ve found myself but I would serve you loyal if you would keep me from the stocks.”
“You can hold a broom? Empty a pot?” he asked.
“I can,” you assured, “my lord.”
“You have good manners for a farm maid,” he mused, “I might find a place for you in my kitchens.”
“My lord? You might direct me to the nearest village so I might find labour there, instead, I would not presume to further tax--”
“My castle is big enough, another hand would be more help than a burden,” he stepped back and waved you around the tree, “I will accompany you back to my keep and return to fetch my men… you look to have been out here long enough.”
“Truly, my lord, I--” you saw his impatience in the vein along his forehead and bowed your head, “I am most grateful.”
“Let us be off or my men might be lost without me,” he said.
He lifted you onto his horse and climbed up behind you. You’d never been astride with a man against you, it was awkward and crowded. He snapped the reins and the horse fell into step. He steered it away from your hiding place.
“Might I ask where I am, my lord?” you ventured.
“This is Astrens,” his voice rumbled through you, “And I am its lord, Duke Steven Rogers.”
Your heart sank as you recognised his name and your mistake. He wasn’t easily known with his beard, newly grown since his last visit to the Lord Barnes’ hold. He was of the few who were granted company with the miserly lord of the castle but there was a chance yet he did not know you. You were after all, only a servant.
🏰
Lord Rogers handed you over to his steward. You were reassured as you were given a cap, apron, and a new dress. You washed out of a basin and reported for your new duties.
It might just be far enough away that you wouldn’t have to worry about Barnes. He never went far from his estate and Astrens was out of the way of the capital. Even if it didn’t work, it gave you time to plot a real departure.
You were sent to the laundries to sweat over boiling cauldrons as you stirred the linens with a large stick. The steams seeped through your clothing and left you out of breath as you wrung out the sheets. You hung them outside along the line and helped beat out the old woven rugs.
After nights in the forest, your first day felt far from a return to normalcy. You were in a new place, you had new duties, and you didn’t know anyone in the castle. You’d worked in Lord Barnes’ manor since his father was still alive and you were only a kid. It was only a few years before Barnes took over but you remember it being much easy to ingratiate yourself to the staff.
You were shuffled onto a feather mattress in the servants’ quarters with three others. The snoring, snorting, and coughing kept you awake and you missed the chirp of crickets and scratching of critters. You woke more tired than any night spent among the trees and went back to the laundries.
Your days took on this pattern, sleep, eat, work, and do it all over again. You were forgotten among the other servants and it really seemed like you might just be able to hide among them forever. 
Nearly a week into your time as Astrens and the castle blustered to a storm. All the drapes were to be taken down, beat, and washed, and all beds were to be stripped and redressed. Servants littered the corridors scrubbing, sweeping, and running from chamber to chamber. When you asked what the occasion was, the response was vague. Lord Rogers is hosting a guest.
You weren’t used to the rush. Visitors were rare at the other castle and rarely were they accommodated so wholly. If they had a place to rest their head and fill their stomach, Barnes felt they could not gripe. Even his greetings were not required on such an occasion.
You helped with the scourging and scouring of the linens and the drapes. You worked so hard you didn’t even have the energy to gulp down the lumpy stew allotted to the servants. You fell into the heap of your bedmates into dreams laced with your own snores. You dreamt of the forest and the sound of hooves.
Another early morning and the gears began to grind once more. Darcy sent you away from the laundries to help refresh the rushes in the entrance hall with several others. You scattered herbs over the grand carpet that displayed scenes of hunting through the seasons. 
You wondered if perhaps Rogers was to be betrothed at last, the news of his first wife’s passing had sent many into gossip even before she was buried. Or maybe the king would make progress to the ancient grounds of the historic castle. You let your mind wander as your body was led by habit.
You heard the rolling of the carriage and the clip clop of horses. You followed several other servants as the tall doors were opened and you peered out into the yard at the party. You backed away as Lord Rogers emerged from the archway that led to the spiraling stairs and crossed the carpet. You could hardly hide your curiosity as you reluctantly followed the other servants. It would be unseemly to remain as Rogers welcomed his guests.
“James!” Rogers’ voice boomed and you stopped just outside the chamber as you looked down the stairs that led to the servants quarters, “it has been too long.”
“It has,” Lord Barnes’ responded and your eyes went wide as Deandra hissed for you to go. You couldn’t move as you listened and she abandoned you with a flutter of her fingers, “you know my father only ever called me James.”
“Ah, Buck, I’m kidding,” Rogers chuckled, “it is a pleasure to have you drag yourself from your hermitage.”
“You would make me regret it already,” the other lord chirped, “but the king did request my presence at the tournament and he did not allow for refusal. I’d prefer to travel with a friend, my only friend.”
“Oh, the sentiment, Lord Barnes,” Rogers preened dryly.
“I don’t know if I should be able to wait to tussle until the tourney,” Barnes jibed, “oh, this old place, has it been so long?”
You shoved yourself away from the door and clamoured down the stairs. You nearly tumbled down the last few and caught yourself on the wall. You sidled past Agnes and towards the laundries. Harriet called after you as you passed and rushed out the doors past the muddy puddles of dirty water and hanging sheets.
The grass was slick beneath your shoes as you raced for the stables. You only needed to hide there for a time and sneak out before they closed the gates. You didn’t make it past the first stall before you heard the steel whine. You turned as Lester greeted you with the tip of his sword.
“The master has been searching for you,” the toothy guard smirked, “oh and what a reward I shall have for bringing him a prize of his own.”
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allthingsarmin · 3 years
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please hear me out , student council president bully!armin x hot goth girl!reader?
Thank you for your request! This prompt made me really thirsty hehehe, but I hope you didn’t have to wait too long. I’ve been getting quite a few goth girl requests, so to all the goth girls who have found my blog, WELCOME!
Warnings: bullying, harassment, mentions of depressive topics, noncon, and then some sexy stuff bc i know yall are horn - ee. Also, sorry this isn’t proofread :(
Fem!Reader, FemBodied!Reader
Minors DNI!
How many times have you been in this position? Submissive under Armin Arlert’s malicious smirk and feeling measly under the bouts of laughter and mockery from your insolent classmates who encourage his harsh words?
How many times have you found yourself running to your dorm after class, crying, loathing the fact that you were different, feeling insufficient because you have never been graciously accepted by others, becoming disgusted with yourself as a failure as your insecurities painfully spill past your eyelids.
How many times have you found yourself hopeless? Hopeless because no matter how many times you go to teachers and counselors for help, they dismiss you with a cackle. “Armin Arlert? The student council president? He is such a gentleman - so responsible and well-mannered. He would never do those things.” Hopeless because of course no one would ever believe the girl who is quiet, strange, and unconventionally a freak who wears nothing but black clothes with edgy designs, chains, and tall boots that match the intimidating aura of your black nails and many piercings. Hopeless because even though you hate the humiliation, hate the demeaning of your very existence, hate Armin Arlert, you can’t deny that you have pathetically fallen like a beggar for his degradation.
Too many times have you found yourself crumbling under the merciless grip of Armin, being thrown around like a puppet to appease his twisted fantasies and inflated ego, his handsome face creepily contorting with a grin each time his cruel insults are aimed at your weak self. Though, soon enough, the school year will end as you are pushed into the warmth of summer, and then you will make your escape from his abominable cage - your escape from the monster that hides behind the intelligent man with the expensive blazers and sweater vests, seemingly gentle smile, and clean face - the monster that hides behind the beautiful, horrible student council president, Armin Arlert.
----------------------------------
On the precipice of escape, the last day of classes before your final exams - that were supposed to be easy and meant for reviewing material - became total hell as you were summoned to the student council office for some ‘unprecedented reason’ or at least that’s what your professor told you.
The walk to the office was a petrifying one. Never before have your boots felt heavy and your knees weak with your heart pounding out of your ears, scared that out of the eight people in the student council you would be faced with the one-and-only Armin Arlert and his mischief.
As soon as you entered the office, you were met with the pain of a shockingly cold, hard floor. Your left thumb nail and pinky broken, your black fishnet stockings torn, and your black eyeliner trailing down your face in waves due to the impact. Armin was waiting behind the door and barbarically pushed you onto the floor right as you entered the room. Upon his sinister eyes, you were so pitifully sprawled in front of him in a confused, fearful haze - such a wonderful sight to see your dark makeup smeared, cheeks red, bruises forming on your knees where your fishnets tore, and the chain bracelet you wore on your frail wrist broken and lying on the floor.
Upon your confusion and fright, Armin quickly steps over your feeble figure as a way of keeping you in place, like a predator fatally cornering his prey. He crouches down on top of you, getting close to your face, his minty breath hitting you in warm swells as his clean-scented cologne invades your nose. In the worse possible position, lying so vulnerable under the man who has tormented you at school all year, you hate to admit how irresistible he actually is - his mesmerizing blue eyes pulling you in like the tides, his beautifully groomed hair contrasting with his menacing smile, his muscles tightening up in his dark blue blazer. How disgusted you are with yourself that just for a second you were willing to take all of his degradation if it meant you got to lay your eyes upon his being.
Armin, feasting upon your beautiful figure, was tearing you apart in his mind. Unbeknownst to you, your dark clothes complimented your skin beautifully, the gruesome designs on your shirts appealingly contrasting with the rare sight of your soft, kind smile, and the black makeup you always wore was never with a fault as it was done perfectly, your black nails leaving Armin with vulgar thoughts about how they would look leaving scratch marks on his back as he roughly fucks you into subspace, what your black and blood-red skirts paired with fishnet stockings would look like while he sneakily tears into you in a public place. How his hand would look around your neck in place of your black chokers. All Armin needed was some hot goth bitch who he could selfishly abuse and degrade while looking cute in her chain necklaces and fitted black tops, and all year had he fantasized about this moment - taking in the sight of your pity allowing the stress from council responsibilities - like speeches and useless complaints from students - to simply just disappear.
“Finally have you all to myself, huh?” he groans, hurriedly taking off his blazer, and unbuttoning his dress shirt, disheveling his collar in the process. Looking around at the empty desks and chairs, you noticed that you two were in fact the only ones in the office and that Armin had slyly locked the door after pushing you to the floor. Your head was burning, and your heart suddenly picked up its pace as you saw Armin begin to unbuckle his belt and fiddle with his zipper.
“W-what are you doing?” you worriedly exclaimed as you moved your messy hair out of your face and scrambled to hold down your skirt.
Armin paused, his grin eerily wide and the glint in his eyes made of pure malice. “Something I should have done a long time ago.”
He, on top of your timid body, shoved his girthy cock into your mouth, his red tip teasingly poking at the back of your throat as tears assault your eye makeup and your face reddens with embarrassment. Armin pulls your hair and forces your wet mouth off of his aching cock, admiring the sight of your wide eyes and blotches of black lipstick painting his thick shaft. He rubs your cheek with his thumb. “Such a pretty goth bitch,” he coos, nearly laughing at the fact his weak, long-time victim was finally exposed below him.
You were stunned, completely numb, so shocked because the man who was always so vile to you was losing himself every time your reluctant tongue slipped past his sensitive tip. So shocked that you couldn’t do anything but comply when he told you to take him deeper.
Armin, with such eagerness, forced your sloppy mouth off of him - after gagging you for what seemed like forever - and sat down on the floor, leaning against the locked door, and firmly grabbing your wrist as a beckon to straddle his lap. Sitting upon his muscular thighs, you begin to realize just how ruined you are, wanting with every inch of your heart to run away from the person who has caused you so much distress yet feeling such a heavy desperation in your throbbing cunt as you gaze upon Armin’s gorgeous figure, his collared shirt slightly unbuttoned and wrinkled, warm red blush thrashed upon his face in contrast with cool blue eyes.
In the midst of it all, you can’t recall how quickly he jerked you onto his lap, rudely pulled your panties to the side, and forcefully thrusted his cock into your messy cunt. Though taking you by an uncomfortable surprise, you hate - hate - to admit how good it felt riding the student council president, Armin Arlert’s, cock, hate to admit how the mixture of abusive slander and your bully’s member inside you made your body shiver with euphoria.
Choose your ending: 1 2
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ppersonna · 4 years
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thunder - ksj | m
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your voice was the soundtrack of my summer. do you know you're unlike any other? you'll always be my thunder. - thunder, boys like girls
↳ summary- you allow your best friend Jin to take you backpacking once per year.  apparently, this year’s outing would be the wettest yet.
↳ rating- explicit/18+/nsfw
↳ pairing- kim seokjin x reader
↳ word count- 6k
↳ genre- fluff, tiny angst, smut, comedy
↳ warnings- penetrative sex, unprotected sex, fingering, dirty talk, light dom!jin, light sub!reader, fucking in tents haha ha ha ha, cum play, cum eating, possessive dirty talk
↳ a/n- wow hello! its been so long since i uploaded a fic i almost forgot how to do it! i would like to give you a fic that i’ve had in my storage since march, and one i’m excited to finally finish. i’d be nowhere without @taetaewonderland​ @xjoonchildx​ @ladyartemesia​ for hyping me up to post it in the first place.  thank u to @shadowsremedy​ for being my fav beta ily ily ily. enjoy my babes! pls feel free to message me!
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 “Kim Seokjin, if you got us lost, I’m going to murder you,” you seethed as your pulled your booted foot out of a slick puddle of mud. 
“I didn’t get us lost, dear. The map is wrong,” he replied coolly as he twisted the crumpled map from portrait to landscape, and back again. “I’m an excellent navigator, but when the tools I have are faulty…”. 
You grumbled, stopping your walk to sit on a fallen log. You sighed audibly at your best friend, still maneuvering in the small clearing in the forest, trying to match the map to where you were. You chanced a look at the sky as you sought to catch your breath and sate your anger. Dark, heavy clouds were forming, the kind that didn’t just indicate a sprinkle but a torrential downpour. 
“Shit, Jin. It’s going to storm soon,” you warned.  
He stopped his map seeking and glanced at the sky, frown buried deep in his face. 
Instantly, as if it never changed, he returned to his bright and cheery demeanor. 
“Well! Looks like we should work faster to make it back to camp, huh?” 
Seokjin would be excited for an unexpected kink in your plans. The boy was obsessed with “roughing it”. You agreed to one weekend with minimal hiking. Camping, in your opinion, was meant to be spent drunk around a fire eating s’mores and telling scary stories, not walking for miles through nothing but trees, mud, and probably bears.
Camping had never been your favorite hobby, and you allowed Seokjin to take you off trail backpacking once per year. The man looked forward to it, planned it several months in advance, and counted down the days until he stuffed you in his Jeep down a deserted forest highway to the campsite. 
Only, Jin never took the “minimal hiking” thing too seriously. 
“It’s an easy hike,” he had promised you that morning as you set up camp. “More of a stroll than anything.” 
You kicked at the dirt beneath you now, upset you had listened to the dark-haired man’s empty promises. 
“How about we just go back the way we came from?” You suggested as you stood up and brushed the dirt off your backside from the log. 
“Nonsense,” he sniffed. “I’ve got it right here. We can take this trail,” he gestured at a clearing through the trees, “for about a mile, turn left at the open valley, and we’ll be back at camp two miles after that!”  He proclaimed his findings as if it were so easy, so obvious. 
“Great, three miles of hiking. After we’ve already done four, at least.”
“Yes, my ever-positive sunshine, you should be happy I found us a shortcut.” He patted your head and smiled at you as he adjusted your backpack strap that was sliding off your shoulders. He lingered, eyes on you and your lips for just a fraction too long, before he turned and began leading you through the forest. 
Your heart was racing, unrelated to the elevation or the hike. 
You gave in so easily to Jin not because he was your best friend since childhood, but also because he was the man you were hopelessly in love with. 
You’d been smitten with the older boy since your senior year of high school, when he jokingly asked you to prom and you realized you wanted Seokjin courting you to be a regular occurrence. 
You stayed by his side through it all, all girlfriends and breakups. It hurt to watch him with another, but maintaining his friendship was more important than anything else and you weren’t about to lose him to a crush that you could easily just avoid. 
Seokjin was attached to your hip, a fact your friends never let you live down. They were relentless in encouraging you two to be alone, and for you to admit your feelings to him. They told you they were sure he would reciprocate it.  
Unbeknownst to them, you had admitted it. 
You and Jin once got messy drunk on the floor of your apartment, where you slithered up into his lap and whispered your secret devotion to your best friend. Seokjin merely laughed and kissed your nose. You were so embarrassed and rejected you never brought it up again. Best to leave it be, rather than bring a 15 year friendship to a screeching halt. 
So—you valiantly stood by him as his best friend and confidante. You were there when he excitedly told you about his new girlfriend, or when he called you crying over their breakup. Your heart twinged at both; you wanted to be the reason for his excitement and the balm to his wounded heart. 
You allowed Seokjin to take you on all his wild adventures. Like now—traipsing through the forest with no direction in sight, because you would have done nearly anything for the boy.
A crack of thunder shook you from your thoughts and you jumped at the sudden sound. 
“Ah, so cute,” he smiled at you, “still afraid of thunder?”
You blushed and pouted. “It just surprised me, is all.”
He smirked as if to say he didn’t believe you and nodded. “We should get a move on, don’t want to get caught in the rain.” 
You shivered at the thought. It was already cool in the forest; the trees providing enough coverage it locked out any sun, if there had been any. You quickly moved in step behind your best friend. It only took a few minutes of silence before the telltale pitter patter of droplets on leaves began. A fat raindrop landed on your forehead. 
“Fuck,” you groaned. “It’s starting.”  
“I know,” Jin suddenly looked worried, his confident demeanor cracking. He looked back at you and tightened the straps on his backpack. 
“Let’s run?”
You were powerless to deny any request from him. Plus, you didn’t really feel like getting drenched. 
You adjusted your own backpack and took off, running through the quickly dampening forest beside Seokjin. 
The rain came in a downpour. It hit you hard, blurring your vision. Seokjin slipped his hand into yours, not wanting to lose you in the storm. You pushed your legs in time with his, jumping around fell logs and rocks and skipping large puddles. 
You were drenched as Seokjin pulled you into a makeshift canopy of rocks, a momentary pause from the storm to catch your breath. Your hair was soaking wet, as if freshly showered. Seokjin’s hair stuck to his face, and you smiled as he looked at you with concern. It only took a moment until you were both bursting with laughter, finding humor at the moment. 
It was something you loved about Seokjin. He always knew how to make you laugh in times it seemed impossible. 
“This sucks,” you spoke through your joyful laughter.  He nodded in agreement. 
“I think we’re almost back. We need to turn soon, and then we’ve got about two more miles. You ready?”
You agreed and pushed back the slick hair in your eyes, before doing the same for him. His eyes sparkled. You didn’t know what it meant. 
In an instant, you were running again. The backpack bounced against your back and rain pounded your body. The things you did for Kim Seokjin. You were whipped, and you knew it. 
The trail seemed like it went on forever. You both became so tired of running that you slowed and trudged slowly through mud as rain pelted you, accepting your fate of soaking to the bone. You were sure you had never been this drenched in your life.  Your clothes were stuck to your body and dripping down into your shoes and socks. Your teeth chattered in the breeze—it felt as if the wind whipped right through you.  The sky rumbled again, as if warning you to hurry lest it dump more rain on you.
Seokjin was always the caring companion. He rubbed your shoulders and arms to warm them up and promised a roaring fire. You hated how much it made your heart burst.
You were very much looking forward to your one-man tent, stocked with a sleeping bag and blankets. You could strip down and dry off and slip into the warmth of your own personal nest. 
Seokjin waxed poetic about his own spacious tent—a lofty family sized one, and how he made sure he brought his sleeping bag along with 8 thick blankets, and how he couldn’t wait to snuggle down into his own.  Seokjin was the picture of preparedness. He even kept a locking box full of snacks in his tent because the boy was a foodie and couldn’t survive without the treats. It came in handy. 
“What would you do if we were stuck out here forever?” You posed to your best friend, curious about his response and desperate to pass the time as you hiked. 
“Well,” he thought aloud. “I’d miss the guys. But I’d be happy to be stuck out here with you.”  
Your cheeks flushed. 
“You wouldn’t miss, ah—what’s her name? Miya?” 
Seokjin shrugged. “She’s fun. She’s not you, though.”
You couldn’t help but grumble internally. She was good enough to date, and you weren’t. She was different in some respect. 
“Are things not going well with her?” You asked, secretly hoping they weren’t.
“It’s fine. She’s nice and all,” he sighed.  “Just, there’s no spark there, you know?”  
You knew all too well. Any man you tried to date paled compared to your best friend, and the fireworks behind your every heartbeat when you were near him.
“What about you?” He was peering into your eyes and into what felt like your soul. “You and Jungkook sure seem cozy.” His tone sounded annoyed, sarcastic even.
You couldn’t help but bark a laugh. 
“Oh god, no,” you shook your soggy head.  “Not my type. We’re good friends and that’s it. Plus, I’m sure he’s into Jimin.”
Seokjin shrugged again. “You sit on his lap and cuddle up to him all the time…”
“Are you jealous?” You smirked, nudging the man.  Please, god, please be jealous.
“N-No!” He was sharp. “I’m not.”
Ouch.
You remained silent, eyes downcast at your muddy boots as you walked alongside the man.
“Sorry,” he mumbled after a beat of silence. 
“Don’t worry about it, Seokjin. I got it—loud and clear.”
Seokjin looked hurt, a wave of dissatisfaction crossing his features. He wanted to say something, mouth opening to continue his apology. You ignored it wholly. He knew your feelings. There was no way he couldn’t remember that night. You pushed ahead of the man, walking in front of him to avoid his pained gaze and likely hurried apology.  
The light of day was leaving. Everything around you was steadily getting darker, and the rain showed no sign of giving up. You silently begged to be back to the safety of your camp soon, lest you become walking mountain lion bait.
“There’s camp!” Seokjin finally pointed and ran through the rain ahead of you.
“Oh thank fuck,” you sighed, feeling as if it lifted a weight from your shoulders. You couldn’t wait to strip out of your soaking clothes and slither into your blankets.
“Oh shit,” Seokjin whispered, stopping where he stood.  You followed his gaze, concerned about what stopped the boy so quickly.   
Your tent was ripped open, the insides of it exposed to the wind and rain. Everything you owned was soaking wet. You had set it up in a clearing with not too many trees above it, and it appeared the lack of protection against the wind and rain tore the poor fabric to shreds.
A worn-out and distraught sob left your lips.
“No!”  
You ran to the tent and nearly cried. Fortunately, beyond just being soaking wet and useless for the night, everything was intact. There was only no warmth to be had. No warm clothes to change into. Nothing.  
“What the fuck am I going to do?!” 
Seokjin placed a hand on your shoulder.  
“You can share with me?” He sounded hopeful. “We can hang your clothes to dry and when the storm passes, we can build a fire and let your tent air out.  But you should probably sleep in my tent tonight.” 
You bit your lip. You had slept with Seokjin in more beds than you could count, always being forced to share a bed as the designated ‘best friends who don’t care’.  And it was never easy for you. You always woke up with the delicious scent of his cologne and shampoo, and your body curled around his. His hardness would always be pressed up against you, and it took all you had not to wrap your mouth around it to wake him up.
“Yeah, thanks Seokjin,” you breathed. “I’m fucking freezing. And I’m tired. I just want to get some sleep.”
Seokjin slipped his backpack off and pulled yours off your frame. He hung them from a sturdy branch, protected by layers of trees overhead, to let them dry.  
“I have some towels in my tent, go on in. You can get dry and hand me your wet clothes to hang. Then you can get in the blankets and I’ll make us something to eat.”
You blushed. Seokjin hadn’t seen you fully naked, ever; at least not since you were toddlers.
Slipping into his blankets while stark nude would be a dream. It was something you fantasized about more than you’d care to admit. But, in the current conditions, being naked and clammy in the blankets next to your best friend who didn’t return any feelings for you sounded more like an awkward moment waiting to happen.
If Seokjin noticed anything, he didn’t show it. He acted as if making you strip in his tent was a normal thing, nothing out of the ordinary. 
“I’ll wait out here,” he nodded dutifully. 
You slipped out of your muddy boots and socks, and into his tent. It was nice and spacious, and the blankets looked incredibly enticing. It was kind of Seokjin to let you stay with him, even kinder that he would remain soaking wet to make you something to eat. Your body felt so worn out and drained, and you were sure he did too. 
You peeled the wet clothing off of you, every bit, before sticking your head out the door and handing him the clothes.  
“Don’t worry about food, okay? You should get dry too.”  
He wrinkled his forehead. 
“You sure?” 
You bit your lip and nodded. 
“I’m sure. Plus, we have your snacks.”
“Ah, good thinking,” he shot his finger guns at you. “I’ll be there in a minute, then. Hand me a towel and I’ll get undressed out here.”
You shyly handed him a towel, now very aware that you and Seokjin would be in the same tent—naked. The thought thrilled you as much as it scared you. 
It didn’t take long to burrow yourself into his freshly made bed roll, sliding into the neat layers. Seokjin was nearly military in his routine and order.  Everything was always tucked, pressed, and laid down perfectly. 
Your body wracked with shivers and chills—the blankets and sleeping bag were cold from the ambient air outside. You folded yourself together in a fetal position to maintain some warmth. It felt good to lie down on the soft bed mat, but the blankets were doing nothing to provide warmth. 
The sound of the zipper opening the front door flap of the tent made you shake harder. You could feel the wind blow through the opening now. The sound of the storm was loud, and you were grateful for the heavy tarp covering Seokjin’s tent. It provided some respite from the wind and kept all water off the tent. At least Seokjin had been smart in his setup. You ignored the man’s suggestions to set up better, and you were fully regretting it now.
Seokjin had the towel wrapped around his waist and stepped about the tent easily. He dabbed at his upper body with a smaller towel from his suitcase and rubbed his hair dry. The normally perfectly coiffed head was now static-y and sticking up wildly. It would have made you laugh if you weren’t so cold. 
Seokjin moved around you and slid into the blankets, leaving a large space between you, before he threw the towel around his waist onto the floor. He was naked now; you noted internally. You both were. A shiver ran down your spine, unrelated to the relentless chill.
It was silent. All you could hear was the beating of the rain on the tarp and your teeth chattering as you shivered. 
Seokjin stole a look at you, finally, and noticed your position, holding yourself to build warmth. 
“Shit, are you okay?” He asked. 
“I’m j-j-just col-l-ld,” you whispered. “And t-t-tired.”
Seokjin didn’t reply, but you heard the scratching sound of a moving sleeping bag and rustling of blankets and suddenly felt a very warm, very naked body pressed against you. It was blissful, and you moaned out loud at the feel of him spooning you. 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. You didn’t know what for, and couldn’t bring yourself to reply. 
You burrowed yourself down into his warmth and felt his arms wrap around you, securing you against him. He radiated heat. He felt like heaven. Your eyes closed—he had you feeling like you had stepped into a delicious sauna.
Seokjin’s muscular arms hadn’t moved an inch since they wrapped around you, but now his hands slowly rubbed at your torso, warming you everywhere his hand dragged. It felt electrifying and your body relaxed easily under his delicate fingertips. 
It started out innocent, rubbing along your stomach and side to warm you further. But his hand began straying north, reaching the crest of your breasts. Your breath hitched as he rubbed over the cold swells. Your nipples were hard from the chill and pebbled even further with the touch of his hands. It made a gasp stick in your throat.
His lips touched your neck, lightly. They were warm too. It seemed his entire body was twenty degrees warmer than your own, and every touch felt like a raging flame. His hands continued rubbing along your breasts as he laved and sucked.
 at the column of your throat.  
As instantly as it began, Seokjin stopped. His hands hovered above your breasts. 
He pressed kisses to your neck and face. “We should sleep, babe,” he sighed.  
You wanted to protest, to push him further, to take care of what he started, but you couldn’t find the energy. Seokjin’s warmth matched with the comfort of his bedroll, and the soothing rise and fall of his breath was lulling you into sleep. Even though it was still early evening, the hike and the run back to safety took it all out of you.  
Seokjin’s arms felt like safety. He secured them around you, slipping just underneath your breasts where his thumb could trace alongside the bottom as you easily succumbed to sleep.
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It was still dark when you woke.  
The rain was still coming down, light this time. It sounded relaxing, soothing. Seokjin was still spooning you, sleeping soundly behind you. You twisted in his grasp to gaze at him. 
His hair was dry now, sticking out randomly about his pillow. You were sure if he saw it he’d panic, normally so precise with his looks. He looked so peaceful when he was asleep, none of his chaotic energy and dramatic charisma. 
You loved every facet of Seokjin. You loved the flamboyance, the sensitivity, the deep compassion for his friends.  
You turned around, as gently and quietly as you could, and pressed a hand to his cheek—rubbing at the warm and soft flesh. He sighed softly in his sleep, moving against his pillow. An eye cracked open, and he stared at you. 
“Why are you awake?” He whispered, his voice gentle. “It’s still dark.” 
He was confused, and the look that graced his features was adorable. You wanted to photograph it and frame it, make it the lock screen of your phone. 
You shook your head. 
“Don’t know.”
Seokjin’s hand rubbed at your shoulder, then up to your face. He tucked your hair behind your ear and smiled at you. 
“You look so cute in the moonlight.”
You closed your eyes, letting his compliment wash over you. You couldn’t find the words to reply. You let him continue caressing your cheek, feeling as if you were living a fantasy where Seokjin touched you like a lover. 
You were so close to him, chest pressing against his own. Something about the quiet storm, the dark tent, had you disregarding any embarrassment you should have felt pressing your naked tits to the man's chest, but the spell of the forest had you pressing closer. Your lips were inches apart, and you could feel his breath on your lips. 
The feel of Seokjin’s lips pressing against yours was light, but felt as if all the fireworks in the world exploded behind your eyes and within your belly. It started sweet, gentle. You kissed him like you always wanted to, full of unrequited love and unwavering desire. Your arms slithered around his neck, pulling him even closer against you.  
The kiss turned deeper, mouths opening to allow the passage of tongues. He sought into your mouth, caressing yours with his own, pouring what felt like his very spirit into you. His hand left your back and slid up your sides to press against your breast. 
“Seokjin,” you murmured, feeling your brain swirl headily. “Feels good.”
He didn’t reply, only kept kissing at your neck and pinching gently at your hardened nipples. It made you cry out, gaping at the slight pain.
“If you want me to stop, tell me.” 
His words were gentle. His hands stilled, stopping all ministrations against you.
Your breath was hard and shaky, matching the erratic beat of your heart in your ribcage. Your unrequited crush of years was now roaming your body, touching you as a lover rather than a friend.
“Please, don’t stop.”
He was on you again, now bloodthirsty for any part of your skin to touch. He tugged at your nipples, suckled up your neck to kiss and lick at the shell of your ears.  You pressed against him, gasping at the feel of his now stiff cock. He circled his hips, relishing in the feel of you against him. You wondered how he would feel inside you. He was thick and long—it would be a stretch, and a most delicious and welcome one.
He pressed you back against the pillow, hovering over your body as he kissed down your neck and sucked at the pressure points there. A pleasured sigh passed through your open lips, reveling in the feel of him on your skin. It was something you dreamed about often. It felt unreal to finally have it. 
You were on display for him, and his eyes raked over you as if you were a Dalí in the Louvre. His hands slid up to cup your breasts, and you tilted your head back to moan. You didn’t care at all about how you looked, how this might be awkward in the next few hours. You cared only about feeling Seokjin within you, getting him off, succumbing to your own pleasure wrought by his hands and his cock.
“Fuck, babe,” he sighed. “Wanted this for a while.”
“Me too,” you gasped as he slid a finger down to your core, circling faintly over your slick folds.
“Have you?”
“Seokjin, I’ve been in love with you since high school.”
Seokjin closed his eyes and smiled, breathing through his nose in contentment.
“You weren’t just saying that when you were drunk then.”
You shook your head, and Seokjin opened his eyes to peer at you.
“No, Seokjin,” you whispered needily, his finger still so torturously close to your clit. “I meant it.”
He leaned down with a smile and planted gentle kisses on your cheeks, adoring and gentle.  
“I’ve been in love with you too. I thought you were just drunk. I never acted on it because I didn’t want to get my heart broken.”
He pulled up and allowed his free hand to cup your cheek.
“I’m going to fuck you now, okay?” He asked. “Like, really fucking hard. You good with that?”
You couldn’t help but laugh. A deep, hearty chuckle passed between both of you, enamored with each other and the situation of being naked and intertwined together, the warmth of your matched confessions surrounding you.  
“Fuck me, please,” you begged.
And Seokjin would be loath to deny you.
His teasing finger finally slid into your core, fucking into you with ease from your slick walls.  You gasped at the welcome intrusion, eyes fluttering closed as he began a slight pace and watched the way you fell apart.
“So pretty,” he whispered. “So fucking pretty.”
He slipped another finger in, scissoring them open as he worked at you.  Your legs trembled, and it made the older man smirk.  
“Look at you,” he praised. “So easily turned into a *gushing* puddle for me.”
You nodded pathetically, back arching as he added yet another finger and pressed at the spot inside you that had your mind spinning and thoughts erasing.
“Oh—God, Jin!”
As much as Jin wanted to see you get off around his fingers, he was desperate for more. You were finally all his—something he’s wanted since he could remember. All he’s wanted was for you to be his.
He pulled his fingers from inside you and smiled as they came out slicked up with your own essence.  He ensured you made eye contact with him, then popped them into his mouth one-by-one, to suck them clean.
It made your mouth nearly fall to the floor as you watched him suck his fingers clean of you. Your body trembled with a need you hadn’t felt before. It was stronger than anything you’d felt before. It was unadulterated desire for Seokjin.
“Mm,” he sighed happily as he pulled the final digit from his mouth. “Delicious, as I thought.”
“Oh, my god,” you gaped. “Jin…,”
The man merely shook his head and smiled, crowding you down and hovering over your lips.
“You’re mine now, you got that?” 
His eyes tracked yours, watching your every movement. It took you a moment to swallow your nerves, to regain any ounce of confidence.
“I’ve always been yours, Seokjin.”
He held you down, watching you with a gleam of wonder in his eye, before surging forward and planting his lips onto yours. His tongue dove in instantly, seeking solace in the warmth of your mouth. Allowing him passage was easy, almost natural. Jin’s tongue swirled around your own as your arms slithered around his neck to bring him closer. Kissing Jin felt like everything you’d imagine it would be, and yet like nothing you could have even dreamed.
Jin didn’t just kiss you—he consumed you. He lapped his tongue into your mouth like he couldn’t get close enough to you. His chest pressed against your body and he groaned into your mouth at the feeling of your perky breasts pushing into his own broad chest.
“Baby,” he whispered as he pulled away. 
It sounded like a dream—the pet name fell from Jin’s lips so easily, as if it were always meant to be spoken to you.
“You’ve always been the one I wanted,” he breathed as he pressed his lips down your neck. “Always the girl I wanted and could never have.”
“Jin,” you gasped as your fingers carded through his hair. “Jin, you’ve always had me.”
He lifted his head and peered deep into your eyes again, so deep it felt like he was glimpsing into your soul.
“I only want you. No one else.”
It knocked you breathless, and it took a moment for you to refill your lungs before nodding.  
“I’m all yours.”
There was acknowledgement in both your admissions. An understanding that there was no more separation of you, and of Jin. That after tonight, it would be a partnership, and the beginnings of something more, something you’ve only dreamt of with the older man.
“Mine,” he whispered, before pressing his lips back to yours.
The kiss was sweet, nearly cloyingly sweet, as his hands cupped your face. He kissed you with every intention, every desperate plea he’s held in his heart for you.
Jin’s length pressed against you—his hips rutting minutely as he kissed you.
“Jin,” you gasped as you pulled away from his lip locked embrace. “Please, I need you.”
Jin’s charming smile spread across his lips, blooming your heart along with it.
“As you wish,” he whispered as he pressed in for another soft kiss..
Instantly, Jin flipped around and switched positions, guiding you to sit atop his hips while he settled down into the mess of blankets and pillows.
“What?” He asked as he noticed your confusion at the sudden mood change, a smirk rising on his puffy lips. “You think I’m gonna let you lay back and make me do all the work?”
There he was, your Seokjin. Never able to keep a comment to himself, regardless of the situation—always working to make you laugh. It made your heart sing.
His hands slid to grip at your hips while you lifted yourself up to hover over his hardened length, lining up the tip to just graze the wetness there.
“You see what you do to me?” You asked with a coy smile. “You see how badly I want you?”
Jin bit his lip, mesmerized by the way your cunt slicked up the head of his cock, desperate to spear into you but holding back.
“Fuck—,” he breathed. “P-Prove it.”
A smirk crossed your features before you took the plunge and allowed his length to slip inside you as you sank to his hips.  The intrusion was welcome, and you gaped at the sensation of him plunging deep.
“Oh, my God!” Jin gasped as you had taken him to the hilt.  His eyes bulged for a moment before they closed in bliss.  “You feel so fucking good.”
You didn’t need to speak. The feeling of Jin’s thick length inside of you was more than enough agreement.  He felt so thick, so long, prodding at the spot inside you that had you weak and stretching you wide to make you gasp at the sizzle of pain.  After a moment of adjusting to his size, you let your hands fall to his chest as you began to slowly rise and fall and set a pace on his cock.
“Oh, fuck, baby,” he whined—eyes wide open and watching you bounce on him. “Shit, this is where you belong.”
You eagerly pinched at your nipples as your pace quickened, nodding at Jin’s encouraging words. Your mouth felt dry, and you felt unable to even vocalize your pleasure beyond your loud sighs and moans.
“Jin,” you breathed.
He nodded, assisting your pace by gripping your hips.  He tugged you down, face to face, to rest on his chest while your hips kept their quick speed of enveloping his cock in your tight heat.  He let a hand cup the side of your face, the other moving to grip your ass.
“You’re all fucking mine,” he grunted as he thrusted his cock up into you, matching the rhythm of your rise and fall. “Gonna make you feel so fucking good every day, baby.”
You nodded quickly, heartbeat rising as you quickened each pound.  Jin’s lips pressed to yours again, this time messier, hotter.  He licked into your mouth, desperate for any more of you he could consume.
“Fuck, you drive me fucking crazy,” he said, cock still thrusting deep inside you. “Let me fuck you from behind?”
You didn’t bother replying, simply removing yourself from his body and assuming the position on your hands and knees.  Jin scrambled to line up behind you, hand pumping his slick cock as he marveled at the sight of you presented for him.
“Take me, please,” you whispered, turning your head to peer at him with a desperate smile. “Fuck me until I can’t see straight.”
Jin hissed an expletive, before lining himself up in your sodden folds and plunging in without a second thought.  Your eyes widened at the new angle, gasping as you felt it hit different areas inside of you that had you squeaking with each hard thrust of his cock.
Jin’s hands gripped your ass, your hips, anywhere he could leave his brutal fingerprints.
“God, you take my cock like a fucking queen,” he gasped as the sound of skin slapping echoed around the tent. “Look at your pussy, so fucking wet for me.”
He marveled at the way his cock plunged deep inside you, then came out covered in your creamy slick.
“You gonna cum for me, baby? You gonna let me claim this pussy with my cum?”
The pleasure was overwhelming—it felt like every nerve ending was lit on fire, and you were a burning fuse about to detonate into a thousand brilliant explosions.  Each thrust of Jin’s thickness had you crying for more, moans echoing off the trees outside.  You were suddenly thankful you were in the middle of nowhere, allowing you to be loud and needy.
Jin reveled in your desperate sighs and the way your body pushed back against his to match his pace.  He knew his end was coming, knew it was going to be short-lived from the start. He’s wanted your body for as long as he could remember, and wanted you in his life as his lover, his girlfriend, more than just what he had been relegated to for so long.  
“Mm, baby, you look so good on your knees for me, fuck,” he gasped as his speed increased. “I can’t wait to make you cum on my cock every fucking day, love. This is my pussy now.”
Jin’s possession of your body made you see stars, vision blurring as your cunt tightened its grip around his cock.  Jin gasped at the grip and his hips stuttered.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he groaned. “I feel you, baby, fuck. Cum for me, angel. Let me feel this tiny little cunt milk me.”
The coil inside you was tightening, pulling tight and making you gasp and scream at the oncoming rush.  Jin’s pounding was relentless, making your entire body shake with the anticipation.  
Your hand dipped to circle at your clit, the ultimate piece to your end. 
The coil snapped, and your cunt pulsated wildly around his cock, vice-grip tight.  It felt as if you had been catapulted off into space, vision blurring and all sound indiscernible from the blood rushing in your ears.
Jin’s climax quickly overtook him at the feeling of your delicious heat gripping at his cock.  With just a few strokes inside you, his cock pulsed hot stripes of cum within you and painted your channel.  Something primal in Seokjin loved that he was within you now, a piece of him deposited inside. 
He allowed a few moments to pass to catch his breath, before slowly easing his spent cock from your dripping walls.  He groaned as he watched a bit of his seed drip out, and he was careful to collect it on his fingers.
“Come here,” he whispered as he pressed his chest to your back and lifted you upright, sitting on your knees.  He presented his fingers to your lips, dripping with your combined slick, and wrapped his free arm around your stomach.
Obediently, you opened your mouth and allowed the man to swirl his cum-coated digits in your mouth. It made your stomach erupt in butterflies, the taste of you and the man you’ve only dreamt about for years now on your tongue.
A crack of thunder shook you from your silent reverie, and Jin removed his fingers from his mouth before wrapping both arms around you and tugging you down to lie face to face on the mused sleeping bags.
“Now, aren’t you glad we did this?” He asked with a chuckle and a kiss to your nose.
You wrinkled your brow and smiled coyly.
“I would have enjoyed it more if you hadn’t gotten us lost.”
Jin pouted and huffed.
“I didn’t get us lost,” he sniffed with indignation. “The map was wrong.”
2K notes · View notes
jiminrings · 3 years
Note
umm maybe this is me projecting bc i am messaging you during my break but for a drabble request, yoongi in a retail setting???? 😐😐😐😐 oc could either be a co-worker or a regular customer who asks too many questions 😔😌
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retail-type beat
drabble week: day three
drabble week masterlist
pairing: customer!yoongi x retail worker!reader
wordcount: 3k
glimpse: "hi! almost thought you were hiding from me for a second. anyways, is this sweater wool or cotton?"
feedback + support mean the world to me!!
the last time you checked, work doesn’t start until nine
you kNEW it doesn’t start until 9 in the morning, so clearly that’s why you’re just wearing slides instead of your sneakers
the company uniform is either black or purple (it has to be from what the store is selling though so you can get to choose) with of course!!!! a lanyard!!!!
and you know this, because you’re still wearing your slides from home because it isn’t opening time yet
“goddamn it, i forgot to bring my slippers,” jin moans the moment he walks to see you, looking down on your feet that only reminds him he’d be stuck in his cool yet painfully uncomfy sneakers
he’s probably the only co-worker that you’re truly close with, not feeling the urge to sell him just to get a free day
“i told you to get the sneakers that nurses use!!”
hands-down one of the best purchases you’ve ever made
retail’s hard and it’s not exactly the best-paying job!!! thankfully the franchise owner is a bit more generous so that’s why you get slightly-higher hourly pay
“i would if they looked a little more seasoned,” jin snorts and stubbornly crosses his arms, “i might sacrifice my pride and buy some compression socks.”
OOOOOH THOSE ARE GOOD TOO
makes you feel like ur walking on air
but lol no seokjin isn’t ready to buy those just yet
he’ll settle on some blisters and putting salonpas patches because they look cooler that way, thank u very much <3
jin yawns, talking about finding a steam iron somewhere to replace a blowdryer so he could break in his shoes
“you wipe the glass this time.”
oh right he absolutely hates wiping down the glass — even before opening!!! even when there aren’t any grubby kids that would soil it instantly with their equally as grubby hands
you don’t mind it honestly
you might honestly like it
you prefer wiping the glass a hundred times over than steaming clothes
there is nOT a single thought in your head when you spray on the solution to the glass, rag and squeegee tucked between your fingers when-
maybe you should’ve hOLY FUCKING SHIT
it’s not opening!!!! it is nOT nine o’clock in the morning!!!!
you know that the shop you’re working in is pretty fucking famous and it’s located on one of the most populated streets ever BUT THERE’S ALREADY SOMEONE
although the bucket hat seems familiar from a distance and-
oh it’s just yoongi
yoongi?
yoongi’s already here????
:O
yoongi, the guy in question, is an always customer!!
no, not a regular customer — an always customer
he comes every week and maybe even twice within that period
he’s a nice talkative customer who likes asking questions and even occasionally guides the other customers on what to buy and where to find it
he’s yoongi!!! of course that’s expected of him
he’s been going here long since you ever started working here, and jin keeps iNSISTING that he’s been here more frequently since you started like a year ago
but doesn’t he come at eleven in the morning?
“woah, yoongi’s already here? — doesn’t he come at eleven in the morning?”
?!!?!!
“i was just thinking the exact same thing.”
jin bangs the glass with his fist and you automatically wince and frown
you dO like cleaning the glass panes!! you didn’t say you liked cleaning them a second time :(
“YOONGI!”
“YES??”
you push jin’s fist away to wipe at the smudge his hand left
“IT’S NOT OPENING YET!”
“I KNOW!!”
wow they’re uh
they’re really loud
sometimes you forget how seokjin could be since it’s been awhile since you heard him yell
lol no one’s been shoplifting recently so you haven’t been hearing him
a mind-blowing idea is for jin to come outside and talk to him in a normal talking voice, so your ears would stop ringing
“HEY! WHAT IF YOU JUST ENTER EARLY IN?”
“REALLY? IS THAT EVEN ALLOWED??”
"YOONGI, EVERYONE ON THE FLOOR KNOWS YOUR NAME. NAMJOON EVEN GAVE YOU A CUSTOMARY BIRTHDAY GIFT, AND WE DON'T GIVE CUSTOMARY BIRTHDAY GIFTS TO ANY OTHER CUSTOMER!!"
namjoon, who technically should be called mr. kim because no one really thinks to call the franchise owner with their government first name, is actually pretty cool
but he's too busy these days and haven't been visiting because he's too busy tending to his newly-opened coffee shop
as if the money he earns from opening his franchise in a day alone isn’t enough :0
"IF YOU SAY SO?"
you’re the one who hikes up the roll-up door in the slightest, enough for only yoongi to enter and not encourage anyone else to nOT enter when it’s still not opening time!!!!
he only has to crouch a little but he still has to dust his thousand-dollar pants as if he crawled through mud
his cream-colored slacks with a large black hoodie that has a giant bear embroidered on the middle of it and mules
... you don't hate his outfits
pretty cute, actually
it's yoongi!!
you'd never catch him lacking!!!
you don't even have to envision him rocking the shit out a paper bag
one time, he came in the store wearing the WRINKLIEST brown linen jumpsuit that no iron could possibly fix and he still pulled it off
toon-teen-ten!
oh god that’s the sound of the intercom
and the sound of the intercom equates to jungkook
... as in jeon jungkook who’s the floor manager and his constant top one goal for every month is to endearingly annoy seokjin
he’s young and mischievous!! but if you were to ask him, only you and jungkook are the people in this floor he’d actually get drinks with outside the shop
“seokjin come to the lingerie department right now, please.”
you see the thing is :D
“now this is just funny
there’s walkie-talkies for everyone here!! jungkook likes intercoms, and seokjin like yelling!!
“WHY ME AGAIN?? I’VE ALREADY FOLDED-“
“there’s a literal rat and i need yOU to catch it!! you know that i hate rodents!!”
him and jungkook are forever gonna be on this eldest-youngest brother dynamic and while jungkook pouts and shared the extras that he gets, jin is the one who kills the bugs :D
10/10 totally fair
fine then!! he’ll catch that goddamn rat
that leaves you and yoongi. alone.
“why did you come so early this time?”
you ask out of courtesy, genuinely baffled too because you know that yoongi’s a creature of habit
yoongi’s eyes pop out, head fervently shaking no
“i’m typically not the type to do that, no.”
???
is he-
are you-
are you both talking about the same thing
yoongi’s face flushes in embarrassment, his mind just then registering what you were actually saying
“o-oh! it’s because last night, i dreamt of the sweater i saw here last week!!"
oh right
typical :D
"need me to find it for you or do you already know the aisle?"
you align the folded shirts by the corners as you pass, looking at yoongi briefly while he trails behind yoh
“not unless you pulled it out already."
he's hoping that dear god you haven't
the black sweater with the moon aND buildings on it and when you turn on the flash, the windows of said building reflect it right back???
he SHUDDERS just by thinking about it
it’s gonna go with everything!!! an instant boost of serotonin every time he sees it
"for you, yoongi?" you shake your head, a small smile on your face that he only sees every once in a while, "i'd comb through the entire stock room."
wait
that’s sweet :((
“i’ll hold you to that.”
you know what??? you're less cranky when it's only him, and a couple of hundred people less
your smiles aren't for customer-service and you don't have misplaced clothes hanging from your shoulders and your walkie-talkie isn't talking in latin
or when no one’s asking you to reach something from the top shelf
or when you’re on the way to the intercom because a kid got separated from their mother
or when someone’s approaching for a refund for a shirt who has a stain that’s 100% no doubt customer error
his feet immediately move on its own because he’s memorized the outline of this too many times
there it is!!!
the sweater he’s dreamt about is already on his hands, only a handful few left
the piece is considerably more expensive than majority of the items here, so that’s why they’re all spaced-out instead of being clustered altogether
yoongi rarely goes to the dressing room, regardless if it's a full-house or not!!
he could just look at an item and immediately tell that it’s made for him ta know
he's beyond sure that this sweater fits him perfectly, but he may want to be here a little longer
yoongi may have say inside one of the fitting rooms and spent a little time in it just to sit on the chair inside, not fitting the sweater at all
he's gotten his item SO quick and he wished he could've just walked slower or pretended to not know where it was!!!
he wants to spend a little more time here
you don't hate yoongi!!! but sometimes he could just be... yoongi
he's quite talkative and strikes it whenever, making you unguarded
he could be overbearing but like an overbearing kind of nice
yoongi’s nice!! he’s the type to ask a lot of questions sure, but he’s also the type that would point the other customers what to buy and where to find it
he’s the type to find an obvious faulty stitch on a shirt, but he’d just quietly exchange it instead of asking for the manager
he’s the type you wouldn’t want to stand behind in line because it would take a long time for him to finish, but he’s also the same one who buys giftcards with generous amounts for family and friends
yoongi’s kind of cool and that’s cemented on your mind
"what do you got for me?"
he materializes out of nowhere, spooked because you thought he already ringed up and was out of the store already
it just happens to be ten minutes before opening and you’re doing last-minute arrangements on a new spread
well, yoongi most certainly is still here and his attention’s piqued
“we have... a new collection."
you clear your theory, awkwardly gesturing because you’re more than aware that yoongi hasn’t seen this either
“yeah, i know that. but like, what's going on??" he gestures to the displays and racks, squinting his eyes, "what's the theme? what's the material?"
:O
uhm you haven't read the brief about this
you aren't even sURE if there is one!!
doesn't everyone make up something on the spot in retail
or atleast that’s what seokjin tells you
“the theme," you clear your throat, scratching your temple before gesturing towards the full rack, "is everything."
“everything?
yoongi’s eyebrow is raised, not expecting that answer at all
you look back to the new feature, and nOW that you think about it,, there's no cohesion at all
“y-yes. the shop was going for the theme of uhm, everything... all at once — yeah, that's it. everything all at once."
it’s a nice way to put it when not one bit of the new collection goes together
“hmmmm. i like it,” yoongi nods solemnly and tilts his head, “and the material?"
"the material?"
you repeat, eyesight not the best so you can’t really tell anything off the bat or uh aNYTHING really
"t-the material is shirt."
they're all shirts!!! that’s it
yoongi grimaces in disgust, the first time you’ve seen of it
“what?? you can't say that.”
he outsretches his hand to the nearest article, holding it up by the hanger
"this, right here, is satin. see how it shines like silk, but doesn't feel like silk?"
uhm yes
you have a gist of what he’s saying but yes
yoongi picks up a pink button shirt this time, flipping it inside out
"this, is silk charmeuse. look at the inside, is it smooth?"
okay where is he going with this
he urges you to put your hand on the fabric and uhhh you didn't sign up for this???
it looks smooth, sure!! end of discussion
"yea-..."
“it's not. it's rough. it is smooth, but it's dull. silk charmeuse is still silk, but the backing it has is different from the lustrous part."
okay yoongi
you’re starting to feel uncomfortable and it has to do something with the tone he’s using on you
“can't believe you didn't know that!! how about this," he plucks out a shirt with a tiny print at the middle of it, "cotton or polyester and rayon?"
"i don't-"
there’s an itch in your neck that you want to scratch, a tell-tale sign that you just wANT to remove yourself from this situation
“come on!! it's a dead giveaway!!"
:((
why is he being like this?
toon-teen-ten!
“y/n, panty section please. jin almost got bit by a mouse and he needs comforting. two minutes until opening, people!!"
jungkook speaks at the right moment, and jin’s little incident is enough of a reason for you to bolt
yoongi's still looking at you but you can't afford to embarrass yourself further
“bye. happy shopping."
huh?
yoongi’s face falls when you leave as cold as that!! typically when you were going to show him out (when it’s regular shop hours), there’d be a smile :((
there's not even a customer service smile :(((
yoongi goes to the only cashier that's open so far and it happens to be far away from you and a teary seokjin
seokjin's fine he didn't even get bit!! that much he could say
but are you okay? uhhh you kinda went cold on him by the end and he thought he started on a good note
yoongi doesn't visit for another week and you don't find yourself counting the days until you meet him again
you did not have a devil wears prada moment where anne hathaway has an epiphany for fashion knowledge
you just felt belittled at a job that isn’t exactly what you wanted anyways
needed, yes. but wanted? not exactly
you know that basic knowledge about clothes is required in a retail job like this and you have it!! you do!!!!
you’d know more if only there were actual available resources for employees to know!!! nobody besides yoongi asks anyways
you’d know if you have time to yourself and aren’t working two jobs trying to make ends meet and tHEN you could pull up a book or something!!!
you’d know if your life is as lax as yoongi’s and could have the budget to buy new things for yourself every single week
“jin, i need to ask you something.”
he hums as called, looking at you briefly until you get on with it
“do you know the difference between silk and silk charmeuse?"
he shrugs casually while you're sitting inside one of the closed-off fitting rooms to catch a break, sharing a burger because the store’s packed-packed
why did you ask him? it’s too easy
“one's made by worms, and the other's a pokémon."
that,.,., could not possibly be righti* it brings you a laugh and you honestly don’t even try to correct him
it’s 11:15 and you kNOW it’s time to resume your shift, straightening your shirt because atleast one (1) person would hound you when they see a familiar red lanyard
oh you’re hounded alright
“hi! almost thought you were hiding from me for a second.”
yoongi????
oh
you haven’t seen him for a week and you don’t know what to feel in all honesty
"anyways, is this sweater wool or cotton?"
wow
you're quite speechless as he holds up the item
really?
this thing all over again???
why are you even surprised
the only thing that yoongi gets your customer service smile, fishing your hand from inside the sweater to show him
“70% wool."
that's it???
NO GOOD MORNING????
you're mad at him, aren't you?
he knew it :((
he knew something was wrong but he just didn’t know what
he’s gonna fix this!! he will
which is why the very next day, he takes the day off from his work and comes to the store at a time he knows you’d surely be there
you're on cashier duty and you like it actually :D
you have an option to sit and the way you’re just gonna scan pricetags (and occasionally enter the code if it doesn’t work) is really appealing
“good morning!"
you’re about to grab the items from the basket laid on the counter and your eyes could only see the very familiar hand
the same one you’ve seen go through racks and racks
yoongi??
he sets his items one by one, buying himself more time
the first one is the same exact sweater he came to wait for before opening
“you already bought this."
you tell him even before you could hold it back, looking back at him briefly before you scan the tag
“i know. i just wanted to see you."
oh
oh
yoongi threw a bunch of other items (individually) so it would be a longer talk, but you scan each item quickly that he’s grabbing things from the counter
hand sanitizer!!! hair ties!!! keychains!!!! yeah he needs them
“i'm sorry that i tend to spring shit on you most of the time. you don't need to know the difference between silk and silk charmeuse."
you only chuckle then, a meek smile on your face
"it's okay, yoongi.”
“it's not."
... it’s not?
yoongi fidgets, opening and closing his mouth like he’s nervous!!! he’s never had his credit card cancelled but he could only feel that this type of jitterness is more than the former
“can i make it up to you? no lanyards, no baskets, no customer service?? i don't wanna fuck things up with you."
“don't feel obligated-"
“i know i could be a condescending ass who expects people to automatically know fabric and whatnot, but i wanna make it up to you."
alright yoongi’s a really good apology-maker
you mIGHT be even flustered a little
“you're holding the line, yoongi.”
“i cleared my schedule."
“i haven’t!!!!!” - guy in the back
“dinner at my place at 8. i-i promise to make your hard-earned break after your shift worthwhile!!!"
hmmm
maybe that wouldn’t hurt
“okay. just because you're holding the line."
“fine by me."
:))
yoongi transfers all the items he bought, all but one, to his tote bag
he hands back the paper bag to you, scribbling his address on the back of the receipt before he does
he lingers a little while at the counter, the people behind him ALREADY switching lanes to the one seokjin’s just opened beside you
it's the sweater that he has too
yoongi scratches the back of his head, this time being the meek one
“what? m-matching sweaters for our first date. s'cute."
193 notes · View notes
lovextriangle · 3 years
Text
Imagine Thorin before The Unexpected Journey
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a/n: early release draft, I’ll probably edit more later!
You were never one to fall for the brooding type, but there was no stopping for the inevitable.
The dwarves showed up out of nowhere. They were passing through Gondor on their way to Dunland where Thror, Thrain, and Thorin had decided that place was their best option. Many of their following had dwindled, most headed for the Blue Mountains or the Iron Hills. Dunland was a place of no importance, it was just a place for them to seek refuge. They had no plans of staying there, for the true goal was to take back their home, Erebor. Though a plan like that already had people grimacing for the bloodshed was still fresh and the loss was many. How could they overcome a beast that had defeated them so easily on their own home front.
They needed allies, they needed help, not from men, and definitely not from the elves, but from their own people, dwarves assisting other dwarves. That is what Thorin thought anyways. But with supplies running low and spirits at an all time downward spiral, they would have to start from the ground up.
About a month after the traveling dwarves had passed through Gondor and finally settled into the neighboring Dunland, Thorin seeked out work. The big city was the best place to look for it, though no one cared about the tragedies a person had been through, if you had no talent or skill, you wouldn’t find a job. Luckily dwarves were brimming with skills and their expertise was known for crafting weapons. The grandson of the King Under the Mountain, became a blacksmith of Gondor for the sake of putting food on the table. He had a perpetual frown on his face as if it was engraved there permanently.
He had all the reason to be, rumors spread fast in Gondor of what had happened to the dwarves and the almighty Smuag, the terror of their lifetime. Everyone was afraid of what the dragon would do next. Most thought that the dwarves would bring it with them somehow, as if they carried bad luck. So Thorin was well aware of how much the people of Gondor didn’t want him there. He wasn’t wanted anywhere. But the skills he possessed as a smith kept his employer from kicking him to the curb like others had done before.
“Another fine piece of weaponry Thorin. The next order is a pair of long swords,” grunted Izec the chief blacksmith of the establishment that Thorin worked for. Sweat ran down Thorin’s forehead as he leaned back to stretch out from the hammering position he had been in. His back ached, he had been finishing up the fine details of his last assignment, the entirety had taken three days, the last five hours he had just completed. He was tired and in need of a break. But Thorin liked pushing himself past that point nowadays. He didn’t really care much about his body at all, he was angry all the time, and it felt good to hammer down something that would bend to his will. If only other things in his life went that way…
“Take a lunch and be back before long, ya hear?”
Thorin only gave a nod as he wiped the sweat from his hands onto his pants as he took his leave from the shop. It was midday in Gondor and people were everywhere. The weather was hot and stuffy, no summer time breeze in the air, Thorin guessed it was just his luck. He had eaten at a couple of stands in the past, the food men served were at least better than elves but it was nothing like home. Weaving through the crowds, he ignored the glances he got, it wasn’t exactly rare to see a dwarf in Gondor but this was definitely the birthplace of men.
He hadn’t been to this particular meal stand before, he was complacent enough to try it since the others hadn’t left a lasting impression for him to seek them out. He just wanted a good, quick meal to regain his strength and head back to work.
“What’ll it be?” Thorin had to take a slight step back to take in the whole menu. “Roast will do.” His response was a curt reply, quick and ready to move on. “7 shillings,” you matched his reply, not really wanting to drag out the conversation either. This was only business after all. Out came a pouch from one of his pockets as he gathered the correct amount. You hadn’t exactly been looking directly into his eyes, just glancing over everything else about him.
He was dirty, a hard working dwarf. Long dark hair, that was thick but not matted. He took care of himself or at least his hair. His cheeks had what looked like dirt or maybe ash from a fire. Dwarves were usually blacksmiths around here so you took an educated guess. “You work with Izec?” you hadn’t intended to ask out loud but it seemed you couldn’t help yourself. There was a reason for asking after all.
Thorin met your gaze, ice cold irises told you one thing. That he wanted his meal and to be left alone. “Yes.” The one word reply, a clear warning to not ask anymore questions. “I’ve placed an order for a piece of metal myself..” it was a low response from you as you had gauged his reaction. He didn’t seem curious or to care about the details of what you had ordered at Izec’s. With that you gave him his meal and he gave you the shillings.
“Thanks.” He was gone, not stopping at any of the nearby tables set up to sit and eat. You watched as he parted ways, and wondered if he would come to your stand another day. Such cold eyes, you had the feeling he wouldn’t. Lunch hour was busy, and more customers took up your thoughts and as soon as the dwarf had came he disappeared from your mind.
A week passed before Thorin decided he had a particular craving. He had thoroughly enjoyed the roast from last time, and had wanted to stop by again. He had lasted a week only because he did not wish to be remembered, he simply wanted the good food and nothing more. Chitchat could wait until after he had reclaimed Erebor. But Thorin found that you simply couldn’t just hand him over the meal without at least one question being asked.
“How’s work?”
“What’s it like being a smith?”
“What do you think of Gondor?”
“You must really like roast, would you like to try our roasted chicken?”
No matter the angry stares or the frustrated sighs, Thorin would respond begrudgingly to each question. He liked the chicken now too, and from the four more times he had stopped by (on different days of course) it was quite apparent that this was his favorite food stand now. Because of the appetizing meals. Not because of your curious brown gaze. Our the sprinkle of freckles that were cast across your face. You had steady hands too, careful in passing and gentle in receiving. The few times your fingers had touched when he had exchanged his money had given him surprising chills. Your touch was quite cold and felt foreign from his hot temperatures.
It was getting a little easier to talk with one another. But Thorin didn’t make it to where it was ever a fluent conversation. He was only here for one thing after all. “Do you eat at Izec’s?” You decided to use up your one question on that this time. If you had counted right this would be your fifteen encounter and you still hadn’t caught his name, they just had so many other interesting things to know first, but you were getting pretty curious about that particular piece of info.
“Yes.” Thorin nodded, and the exchanged of meal for money transpired. You decided you weren’t satisfied, “Well isn’t it a bit stuffy to eat in there?” Thorin had taken one step away, “Sometimes” he agreed, not very happy that this was turning into more than the one usual question. “Well you could eat by the stand.. I give out complementary bread to my customers who do.” This was a lie, but maybe some enticing fresh bread would make him stay a little longer. “Maybe next time…” He wasn’t buying it, or maybe he wasn’t that hungry, or maybe he didn’t want to answer anymore questions. Whatever the reason, he was gone before you could talk him into it further.
Your sigh was obvious as it was loud.
“Maybe he’s just not into ya”
Your eyes immediately rolled, “Can it Howser.” The neighboring stand was a flower seller. He sold beautiful orchids when in season. But he was terribly nosy. “Well I’m just sayin, he’s only ever given you one-worded responses. Can’t get much dryer than that!” He laughed to himself at your misery. It was true you were getting nowhere in the sense of progress. Progress in what exactly? You weren’t entirely sure, maybe you could admit you had a crush on the recluse dwarf. “Any ideas then? I’ve tried to point out at least my interest,” you glumly stated, not wanting this to turn into some laughing stock at your failures.
“How about giving up?” Howser laughed, and the laughingstock it was. You glared at him as he tried to choke back his giggling. “Thanks.” You answered sarcastically and stopped paying attention to him, to which he tried to offer real advice but was left to be ignored.
Maybe giving up would become an option if the dwarf never came back. But he did come back, and it no longer took a week in between his visits. It was more frequent which had him occupying your thoughts more than the usual. The only thing that didn’t change was how uninterested he seemed in you. Which had Howser teasing you as soon as the dwarf departed. The game of chase felt like forever until that one fateful day.
It was a Tuesday afternoon, the sun taking its course to the west. It was unusual for the dwarf to come so late and even more unusual for him to be carrying a package. “What’s th-“ Your words were cut off with the thud of the item being placed on your counter. “Your order.” Thorin replied, already knowing the answer to the unfinished question. Izec was well acquainted with most in Gondor, which made him a good businessman. But once Thorin had told him about your stand and how good the food was, it was now tasked to him to deliver the finished product.
“Thank you for bringing them, you didn’t have to,” Thorin didn’t say anything as he had been told to do so it wasn’t like he was doing you a favor. With the silence, you decided to tear the parcel excited to see the results. Two beautifully slender long swords were revealed to you. Your breath was sucked in as you saw the fine lines and detailed swirls,
“Is it to your liking?”
This was the first question, he had ever asked to you. Just that had your heart rate accelerating. You assumed he had not only brought it to you, but had been the one to create such refinery. “It is, absolutely.” You beamed and he nodded, “To what name can I thank for such hard work?” You figured now was as good as anytime to finally ask the burning question. He was a mystery man, a stranger with no name, and you couldn’t continue to go on like such.
“Thorin.” He answered and had thought to himself that you had already known since most in Gondor knew from the rumors. “Thank you Thorin, I will treasure them.” He was never one for smiles, but somehow you knew he was at least proud of his work, and satisfied in knowing that you would be the one the wield them. You were positively optimistic in thinking that things would only get better with the two of you from here as he walked away. You let him go with no questions trailing him. With his back turned he held up his hand in departure, you couldn’t hold back your grin.
“Until next time,”
67 notes · View notes
mitts2002 · 3 years
Text
Aight’ Bet
Hi this is my first time posting on here so I hope whoever is reading this enjoys!! This is a noritoshi kamo x reader where the nori and (Y/N) need a little push from their wonderful Gojo sensei to finally confess~
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"Dont you think (Y/N) and noritoshi would make the cutest couple!?" Gojo screamed over the phone to Utahime who sighed in response.
"I can't help but disagree Gojo, Noritoshi doesn't seem ready for a relationship plus is the only reason you rang me really to discuss our students non existent love lives?" Utahime retorted knowing that the couple would in fact be adorable yet refusing to accept that Gojo could actually be right about something.
"No Utahime! I bet if them two were able to spend a few hours together the tension would build up so high that one of them would burst and BAM a couple would be born" the blue eyed male replied, the volume of his voice increasing with each word trying to convince her that they were the highschool sweethearts the jujustu world needed.
“How could you even say that!? I get that its cute whenever they glance at each other and shy away with cute little blushing cheeks but i bet it would take more than a few hours for a whole relationship to-” “OH you bet“ Gojo interrupted an obvious smirk on his face knowing Utahime wouldn’t back down from his advances.
“you know what i meant idiot i wasn’t actually trying to make a bet with you especially after what happened last time” the black haired woman scoffed after hearing a chuckle through the phone.
“Aight’ bet! tomorrow ill bring my second years to kyoto for some training and then lets see if something happens between our precious students“ Gojo proposed excitedly as if he were a child in a sweet shop.
“you know what fine! and im only agreeing cause i know nothings gonna happen tomorrow between them i mean noritoshi is too stiff and (Y/N) always backs out last minute” utahime exclaimed not wanting to prove Gojo right. “GREAT! if i win then you will have to be my slave for 2 whole days and if you win ill be your-” “wait i never agreed to that!” “see ya tomorrow then!” Gojo had quickly rushed his farewells before hanging up relieved he avoided Utahime’s lecture.
"Alright class!" Gojo sensei yelled excitingly as he burst through the doors. This overgrown man child always had something new, it could never be a regular class where his students actually learn then were let out for a break. No Gojo Satorou had to be the most extra male on this earth and for the first time ever it worked in his second year student (Y/N)'s favour.
"What it is now?" Maki groaned with an annoyed expression on her face. No one could blame her though after all the blindfolded man put his beloved students through. "Don't be so sour maki! Be like me a sweet little mochi~ Oh and before I forget I wanted to let you all know that we will meeting with our lovely sister school for some training. Isnt that great!?" Gojo sensei had announced clapping his hands and smiling brightly.
'I wonder if training is all this is' (Y/N) thought to herself realising how sus this situation was before speaking out "wait Gojo sensei weren't we meant to learn a super secret technique today? You said that you were gonna show it us yesterday and that nothing could stop you" (Y/N) questioned as Inumaki gave a little "shake" for support.
"Well my dear (Y/N) something VERY important has come up and we must go to kyoto immediately. You have no right to deny and we will be leaving in 30 minutes so go grab whatever you kids need" Gojo sensei had practically sung before skipping out the door. What an odd man everyone collectively thought before getting up to grab whatever they needed.
30 minutes has passed and in that time panda had gathered his and maki's weapons while you and toge stocked up on cough medicine and basic medical equipment. The journey was short since Gojo had practically teleported you all there and all that was left was to approach the students.
A few figures from the distance were slowly coming into view and (Y/N) could vaguely make out that only utahime, miwa, mai, momo and noritoshi had attended this last minute joint training.
Despite the others reaching and gathering around your small group of second years giving their greetings the only thing your eyes could focus on was noritoshi’s thick black hair as it gently swayed in the breeze. Honestly it was as if the man was in a L'Oréal advert or something.
"(Y/N) stop staring we all know you both have this weird thing going on but we're here to train not flirt dumbass" Maki had whispered into your ear but little did she know that you were in fact here to flirt and not train due to a certain bet between two teachers.
“alright kids listen up! me and the wonderful Utahime sensei have set up this last minute training as its always good to train with new people and techniques. Everyone will be working in pairs“ Gojo announced before Utahime continued.
“The teams we decided on today will be Maki and Miwa, Momo and Imumaki, Panda and Mai then (Y/N) and Noritoshi. Eveyones free to do whatever they want in their sparring matches just don’t severely injure each other, me and Gojo will be watching over the matches and determine the winners“ Utahime informed all the students before they scurried off to in different spaced out areas.
"So Noritoshi how are you? Its been a while since we've last seen eachother" (Y/N) said trying not to let her nervousness show.
"I'm alright just studying and training to be honest. Although I recently started to practice cursive and can even write my own name now" he responded with pride and a small nice.
You laughed causing Noritoshi to cock his head to the side in confusion. "Is there something wrong with cursive?" His deep voice asked with clear offense.
"No no it's just that's so freaking cute and you look so happy about it too" (Y/N) teased with more laughter and ruffled his hair
"Oi don't touch my hair do you know how long it takes to do these wrap bang things?"
"Well how would I know I've never done them nori"
"Well one day I could teach you if you'd like" Noritoshi offered looking to the side trying to hide his red cheeks.
"Aww I'd love that I'm awful at doing hair to be honest so learning some new styles would be great but first we gotta get this dumb sparring match over and done with" (Y/N) moaned as she got into position.
_______________________________
An hour had flew by and the students were taking a break from their matches happily chatting away while the teachers spoke in private about their progress. “come on look at the way they look at eachother OH (Y/N) touched his shoulder SHES FLIRTIN-” “GOJO SHUT THE FUCK UP YOUR SO DAMN LOUD” “sorry but loooook they in love” Gojo cried out with fake tears in his cerulean eyes
“Alright lets just observe look theyre going to the vending machine to get some drinks like FRIENDS DO“ Utahime emphasised on the friends worried she might lose and become this awful mans slave for 2 days.
_______________________________
“Nori im gonna go get a drink from the vending machine do you want one?” “Actually ill just come with you if you dont mind” “OH sure thats fine does anyone else want anything!?” (Y/N) yelled to the whole group receiving a choir of get me this please or get me that and the single tuna mayo.
The walk to the vending machine was quiet but a comfortable silence had fallen upon the pair. It was always like this when you were around Noritoshi Kamo. Peaceful. She didnt feel the need to go the extra mile to entertain him or ensure he wasn’t bored in your presence as your playful banter and sarcastic remarks towards one another was enough for the both of you. 
“(Y/N) is it me or have Gojo and Utahime sensei been staring at us more than the others?“ Noritoshi questioned unable to shake off the feeling of being watched. “Um i’m not too sure i havent been really paying attention to anything other than yo-“ Embarrasment washed over (Y/N) as the words flew out of her mouth before she could stop herself.
“Is that so?“ Nori smirked slightly as you swore you could drop dead right here in this moment. “No i just meant that” “Meant what?“ Noritoshi interrupted leaning closer as you fumbled through your words
“OH LOOK the vending machine is right there better get those drinks“ You quickly said and scrambled away before Noritoshi could get any closer.
“SEE Nori was too intimidating and (Y/N) ran off despite clearly wanting him! its never gonna happen today“ Utahime whispered to Gojo benhind the bushes as he shook his head. “Trust me i have faith in my wonderful (Y/N) I AINT RAISED NO BITCH“ He exclaimed in response while Utahime facepalmed.
The two young adults had collected all the drinks they needed and were ready to walk back to the group. ‘come on (Y/N) you’ve liked this man forever now and everyone knows he must like you back ITS NOW OR NEVER HOE’ (Y/N) screamed words of encouragement to herself before grabbing Noritoshi’s sleeve.
“Is everything alright (Y/N)?” “I have something ive been meaning to tell you Nori, I um like you a lot and i’d like to take you out if you dont mind” (Y/N) had practically yelled at the poor boy because of her stupid nerves and adrenaline.
The silence was broken by an angelic laughter coming from none other than Noritoshi Kamo. “Well i would’ve liked to be the one to take you out but i guess sometimes its alright for traditions and stereotypes to be broken by the younger generation” Nori responded as he walked closer to (Y/N) wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into a sweet kiss. The kiss was messy and clearly new to the both but filled with much love and passion that was finally being expressed by the pair.
As their lips eventually pulled away never wanting this to end, heavy breaths filled the air and cheeks flushed but all that was interrupted by a white haired male clapping in the background screaming “YES I WIN” while the other teacher crouched to the ground tears in her eyes.
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whimsical-musingss · 4 years
Text
Calling
Summary: when the group arrives to Alexandria, a lot of things change, especially between you and Daryl. (S5)
Warnings: typical TWD violence/gore, grief and loss. Fighting. Age gap. Fluff. Not my gif.
Pairing: Daryl Dixon X F Reader
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The large gate slides shut behind the group, and you immediately feel trapped. When you look at the others, you know that you aren’t the only one who feels this way.
Then Rick is off to speak with Deanna, who you assume is in charge here. You begin to feel more on edge as Rick walks away, and Judith begins to whimper in Carl’s arms.
You sneak a glance at Daryl, who is still holding the opossum by its tail. Your face twists in digust, which he notices, and raises his arm to move the dead animal closer. When you back away you notice the small smirk on his face, but he doesn’t say anything. Neither do you.
The group waits in anticipation for Rick to return, and it doesn’t take long before he does. Aaron points to you, motioning you to step forward. You do.
“Deanna wants to speak with you now,” he says, and you only nod as you begin to walk with him, turning back to the group. Rick only nods, but Daryl looks more agitated.
The walk to Deanna’s house is quick, and when you stand on the porch, you’re amazed how huge the house is. How clean and tidy the lawn is. And when Aaron leads you inside, you could only stare in amazement at the furniture and the rugs. And damn, they’re clean.
“Hello, Y/N,” a woman says, and she’s standing in the middle of the room behind a couch. There’s a camera next to her, facing a chair.
You could only walk slowly to her, feeling extremely out of place. You peek at Deanna, who gives you a warm smile. You don’t return it.
“Please, sit. Do you mind if I film our conversation?” She asks, and you shrug as you sit slowly on the chair. It’s soft, and you run your fingers over the arm.
“Rick told me your name,” Deanna continues. “Are you close with Rick?”
You shrug again, your eyes peeking at the camera and then back down at your lap.
“Tell me, Y/N, did you grow up in Georgia?”
You nod, confused at her questions.
“What did you do before?” She asks again, leaning into the couch, eyes trained on you.
“Um...I am, well, I was a doctor,” you mumble, fingers now picking at the fabric on the chair arm.
“Which field of medicine?”
“Pediatrics.”
“Ah, so, I assume you are Judith’s doctor at the moment?” Deanna smiles.
“If you want to call it that.”
“Did you like your profession?” She tilts her head, analyzing you. You squirm.
Your brow furrows at her question, yet you know your answer. “I loved it,” you whisper, not meeting her eyes. “It was my calling.”
She nods, tapping her finger on her chin, thoughtful. “Did you have a lot of patients?”
You nod, a small smile on your lips.
“Besides pediatrics, do you have knowledge on how to treat adults as well?”
You nod again.
“All right, Y/N. It was very nice to meet you, and I’m sure I can find you a job here. You’ll fit in well here,” Deanna stands, and so do you.
“Thanks,” you mutter, and Aaron is outside when you open the door.
“What does Deanna mean by jobs? What jobs are there?” You ask.
“Did she give you one?” He asks.
“She said that she can find one,” you reply.
“And she will.”
When you return to the group, Rick immediately stands, his brow furrowed. “What did she ask?” Judith squirms in his arms.
“What I did before,” you whisper, looking down at Judith, letting her wrap her tiny fingers around your bigger one.
“Nothin’ else?” You shake your head at his question.
Daryl hovers, listening, the opossum’s tail still in his damn hand. And when it’s his turn, he takes it with him.
“I don’t think that’ll give Deanna a good impression,” you tease him, and he just scoffs.
The group is given two houses, but Rick has everyone stay together in just one, so everyone can sleep in the living room as a pack.
The group tentatively explores each house, however, finding changes of clothes and stocked fridges and cabinets full of food. You almost cry with joy when you turn on the shower, feeling the steam stick to your skin.
“You gon’ shower?” Daryl asks gruffly, and you turn to him, your change of clothes in your arms.
“I think so,” you say, your smile bigger than he’s ever seen it.
“Have fun,” he says, snarky, but he means it. Your smile doesn’t go away once you shut the door.
When the sun sets, everyone gathers in the living room, stomachs full and content for the first time in what feels like forever. You’re sitting near the windowsill, staring out into the darkness while you run a comb over and over through your wet hair.
It’s been forever since you combed it. Or washed it, or yourself. You feel better, refreshed, but still uneasy.
“Ya gotta knot or sumthn’?” Daryl quips next to you, obviously irritated how much you’re combing. “Just nervous,” you mutter, and stop moving the comb. You set it on the windowsill, sighing. He continues to look at you, and he has to admit, you look...nice. In a simple, clean tank top, skinny jeans, and sneakers. He flushes at the realization and looks away.
When there’s a knock at the door, everyone tenses, some standing up. Rick is the one who answers, and it’s Deanna. Everyone relaxes slightly, but Daryl is still tense next to you.
“I’m here for a couple of reasons,” Deanna smiles. “I’m here to check on you all, but also giving Y/N her clothes for her job.”
Your head jerks up at your name being spoken, and so does Daryl’s. Rick turns to you, nodding, so you slowly stand up and walk to the door.
“Hello,” you say, and Deanna nods. “I’m assigning you to be a doctor. Pediatrics as well as to treat wounds. No surgery,” she adds when you frown at the “treat wounds” part.
“Are...are you sure?” You ask, hands limp at your sides.
“You said it was your calling,” Deanna says.
“It’s been a really long time...I don’t think-“
“I think you can do this,” Deanna interrupts. “Make it your calling once again.”
She hands you a white coat and you feel like you’re at your old hospital, getting hired, and taking the same coat. Deanna also gives you a stethoscope, and you unconsciously put it around your neck.
“See?” She grins. “It’s still your calling.”
With that, you thank her numbly and walk back to your spot with Daryl. He’s staring, as always, and you look at him. “What?” You ask, and he smirks at your stethoscope. You scramble to take it off.
“Doctor L/N,” he smirks, and so you kick him with your foot. “Don’t be a prick,” you grin.
“You wanna do it?”
You shrug. “I don’t know. I mean, before...I loved it, but now, I know that the work I’ve done amounted to nothing.”
“Don’ say that,” Daryl grumbles. “You worked yer ass off, don’ forget tha’.”
You shrug, turning the coat over in your hands, folding it. Your eyes meet his, a small smile on your lips.
“Thanks, Daryl. You should become the official Alexandrian counselor,” you laugh when he scoffs, rolling his eyes.
The days become blurry. You’ve adjusted to your job, picking up the profession like it’s riding a bike. You mostly saw people injuring themselves for stupid reasons, especially during the apocalypse. You saw some kids, and you notice you are happier, more open, with them. You’ve become some sort of yourself again.
You didn’t see Daryl much. You mostly saw him in the evenings, when he’s sitting on the porch, smoking. You’d always chide him for it, but now it’s become a joke. Especially since you’re back to being a doctor.
It’s mid afternoon, and you stand at the front gates waiting for the group to return in case they need medical assistance. It’s been a couple of minutes, so when you see Daryl in the distance, you raise your hand to wave at him. He nods in return, and you smile when he begins to make his way over.
The gate begins to open, so you turn around to greet Glenn. Your voice dies in your throat when you see him. He’s pissed as hell, yelling about how Aiden could have killed Tara.
You give Tara a questioning look, and she shakes her head. You are about to ask, but Aiden jabs Glenn in the chest, so you decide to step in.
“Enough of this!” You say loudly, putting your hands up and stepping between them. “What the hell happened?”
“It doesn’t concern you, nurse,” Aiden snaps, still glaring at Glenn.
“Aiden almost killed Tara because he doesn’t know what the hell he’s doing,” Glenn says, and when Aiden tries to lunge at him, you put both of your hands to keep him away.
“Stop! What is wrong with you?” You cry.
Aiden flares down at you now. “Like I said before, nurse, stay out of it.”
“Don’t nurse me, asshole!” You say, disgusted. “I’m trying to stop you from making a big mistake!”
“Ya heard the woman,” Daryl growls, appearing behind Aiden.
“The girl isn’t the boss of me,” Aiden says stubbornly.
“Enough!” You say loudly.
“Listen to Y/N,” says Glenn. “She knows a hell of a lot more than you.”
Aiden’s hands fist your coat, throwing you aside like you weigh nothing. You cry out, landing on your side. You scramble to get up to stop Aiden from attacking Glenn, but Daryl is quicker.
He grabs the back of Aiden’s shirt, ripping him from Glenn. He’s on top of him, slamming his fist over and over on Aiden’s face.
“Daryl!” You gasp, throwing your arms around his torso, trying to pull him off. You didn’t see him, but Rick is suddenly there, and Daryl is off of Aiden.
“Are you okay?” You ask Daryl, making sure to kneel in between him and Aiden. His face is in your hands as you look for any wounds, but there are none. He avoids your eyes as Deanna approaches, saying something, but you ignore her.
“Daryl?” He finally looks at you, eyes soft. “Are you okay?”
He only nods. “Are you?” You nod.
“What about me?!” Yells Aiden, and you scoff. “Kleenex and ice, and staying away from him.” You nod at Daryl. “You know what he can do.”
You turn back to Daryl, grabbing his hands and helping him stand. He lets you, turning away and stalking off before you could say another word.
Deanna’s party was boring. You were asked the same questions. What hospital did you work in? How many patients? You tried to answer through gritted teeth, mentally exhausted from repeating yourself and having to listen to oblivious people. And the dress. Before all of this you would love wearing it, but now, it’s unpractical. And you had to shave for it. And the little heels? God, your feet were aching. You had enough. You said your goodbyes, claiming that you were tired and had an early shift tomorrow.
You walk back to the house, the wind making goosebumps appear across your skin. You lift the dress neckline higher as if can go for the millionth time tonight, not liking how much cleavage was being shown.
You weren’t surprised Daryl didn’t show. Yes, you were hoping he would, but deep down you knew he wasn’t a fan of gatherings. Especially something this idiotic.
You pass Aaron’s house, and the garage door is wide open, spilling light on the driveway and sidewalk.
“Y/N?”
You turn, and Aaron is walking out of the garage. “I thought that was you,” he says, and he points to your shoes. “I heard you coming.”
“Not creepy at all,” you quip. “Can I help you?”
“Just saying hi,” he says, unfazed. “Showing Daryl some bike parts. He’s going to be another recruiter for Alexandria with me.”
“Is that so?” You ask, leaning to look into the garage. And there he was, tinkering with parts and examining them. You walk up to the garage, fixing the neckline again, and Daryl’s head looks up when he hears your shoes.
“Hi,” you say, smiling. His eyes look down at your dress, your shoes, and back at your face. You fix the neckline again, uncomfortable.
“Hey.”
“Got a new bike? That’s great,” you smile at his work.
“Yeah. Where were ya?”
“A dumb...,” you trail off when Aaron looks at you. “A party. At Deanna’s.”
Daryl smirks at you, standing up from his work. “I’ll walk ya,” he mutters. He nods at Aaron, and you shrug. “Okay. You done?” You ask, and he nods.
The walk is short, only three houses down. But your feet hurt, so you walk slowly, and Daryl walks in pace with you.
“Recruiter, huh?” You ask, and he nods, kicking a stray rock. “Lucky. Get to go outside.” He only nods again, glancing at you.
“I don’t want ya talkin’ to Aiden,” he suddenly says, his voice gruff.
“Wasn’t planning on it,” you chuckle. “Prick shoved me.”
“If he touches ya, or goes near ya, tell me,” he continues. “I’ll beat his ass again.”
“I’ll help you,” you joke, but he’s not smiling.
“I mean it,” he says, stopping, grabbing your arm, but not hard. Your eyes shoot up at him, surprised. “Nobody touches you like that again.”
“I promise,” you say, and he eases up, letting you go. You grab his hand in response, smiling to yourself as he doesn’t try to pull away.
“Ya mean a lot to me,” he mumbles, and you nod. “You mean everything to me,” you reply, squeezing his hand.
You reach the house, and he goes and sits on the porch, lighting up. You decide to sit next to him, sliding off your shoes and spreading out your legs, sighing in relief.
“Pretty dress,” he mumbles, taking a drag.
“Thanks. I’m never wearing it again,” you chuckle, and he lets out a huff.
You hold out your hand and take the cigarette from his lips and putting it to your own, taking a small drag before giving it back.
“Yer a doctor,” he says, surprised.
“Which is a stressful profession,” you smile, exhaling away from his face.
“You always gimme shit for it,” he says, sulky, and you laugh.
“Gives me a reason to talk to you,” you reply. You move your body so you’re leaning against his chest, in between his legs, and Daryl doesn’t complain. He passes the cigarette back to you, and you take your last drag.
His arm is unconsciously thrown around your waist, and he’s like a big teddy bear, encasing you, protecting you.
“I think it’s clear now,” you say, “that I have feelings for you.”
“Very clear,” he says gruffly, and you can feel the rumble against your back. He puts out the cigarette, his now free hand running down your arm.
That’s all you need. You move your body around so you’re kneeling in front of him, noses almost touching. “You...,” you trail off, and he leans in, connecting your lips with his. It’s a short kiss, but soft.
“That answer yer question?”
“Clearly,” you reply.
3K notes · View notes
lexosaurus · 3 years
Text
Everything Was White Part 13
[see all chapters]
read on: [ffn] / [ao3]
General Warning: From this point on this fic is going to deal with reoccurring themes that may be triggering to some. Please check out the ao3 tags if you’re unsure.
---
Muffled voices pulled him from the comfort of unconsciousness, shaking his mind awake despite his feeble attempts to brush them off. For a moment, he thought about trying to tell the voices to keep it down, but that would have been too much effort, and he was so comfortable in this blanket and pillow…
...the voices rose in volume, this time gaining clarity, shape. Almost words. Close, but not quite. Not yet. Danny wasn’t ready. Five more minutes, he was so tired…
“...Danny…”
Wait.
What was that?
His eyes fluttered open, and he immediately took stock of his unfamiliar surroundings. He was...not in his bedroom. He was in his living room, on the couch where he must have fallen asleep after his almost mental breakdown over a glass of water.
How embarrassing. Danny hoped that no one spotted the water glass on the rug. Or, if they had, they hadn’t thought anything about it. Hadn’t figured out that it was on the floor because Danny tried to get water from the sink without using his wheelchair.
Maybe they wouldn’t connect the dots. Honestly, the thought of seeing that pitying expression on their faces as they watched him fail to do a stupidly simple task made him want to fall into a coma.
Oh well. He was awake now. Might as well go get something to eat to make his family and therapists proud.
Just as he was about to toss the blanket off his body, Jazz’s quiet voice sounded from the kitchen. “You can’t keep the truth from him forever.”
“We can, at least for now,” his dad said.
“It’s not going to work.”
Danny froze, the last of his fatigue zapped from his brain.
What truth? What were they talking about? What was going on in there?
He debated standing up and announcing his presence, but the blossoming sense of dread in his gut kept him still.
Whatever was going on, he had a sinking feeling that it was about him.
His mother spoke up. “We have to. It’s for his own safety.”
“It’s wrong,” Jazz countered. “It’s wrong to keep secrets like this.”
“I know, Jazz. But if we told Danny, he…”
His eyes widened, his breath catching in his throat.
Tell him what? 
“Jazz, you have to understand. With Danny in the position that he’s in right now, there are just certain limitations that we need in this house in order to stay on top of his recovery,” Jack explained.
“But cutting him off from his core?”
It was as if he were punched in the gut. He clenched the blanket, balling the edges in his fists. His instincts were screaming at him to jump up and demand the truth, but he buried that part of him back down inside his mind.
They would never tell him. They didn’t trust him enough. He wasn’t human enough.
But they always trusted Jazz. They favored her. She was the ideal child with her perfect grades, perfect ambitions, perfect brain.
Even if they wouldn’t tell him, of course they would tell her. 
“We have to do it, honey. We have no choice,” Maddie said.
“You see how he’s reacting to this though, right? He’s not himself.”
“We know, but it’s what needs to be done. He can’t be given access to his core, not right now.”
Why though, Dad? Tell me why...
“This is cruel,” Jazz said.
There was a brief pause, each second like a knife in Danny’s chest. He wanted so badly to snap, but he forced himself to stay still. To stay silent.
To listen.
There was a sigh, and Maddie broke the silence. “You have no idea how much it hurts us to see him like this. We know it isn’t right to keep a ghost from its core but...at the school that day. Jazz, I’ve never seen him like that. And it terrified me.”
Danny felt his blood drain from his face. His body turned ice cold.
He knew what they were talking about, and he assumed that that day was a distant memory in the past, something that would never be talked about again. And yet, here his parents were, digging up the most humiliating moment in Danny’s life, throwing it at his face like a weapon of why he couldn’t possibly be allowed his ghost half, why he needed to be shut off from himself.
“He’s come a long way since then.”
“Not long enough.”
They didn’t know. They didn’t understand what it was like. They weren’t there, they weren’t the ones who were cut open, who were beaten, who spent all day in and out looking at white walls, white floors, white suits, white ceilings, white equipment.
He hadn’t been himself that day at the school. He’d just come home from the hospital, he was coming off of a cocktail of heavy pain medication, he was physically exhausted from the PT and mentally exhausted from everything else. 
Okay, so he snapped in the locker room. He’d been pushed back into school, pushed into being around people, pushed into acting normal, like nothing was wrong, and the world was warping around him and he just fell apart. He freaked out, he broke a mirror, Dash and Kwan found him, and he paid the consequences for it.
“I don’t think he’d do that again.”
“You don’t know that, Jazz.”
“But his Obsession—”
“It’s protection. Phantom will make him do whatever it can in order to protect itself. Even if that means…”
It. 
The word echoed in Danny’s head.
You’re an it.
Something inside him cracked.
His vision glazed over, and suddenly the two students in Casper he’d hoped to never cross paths with again were standing over him, approaching cautiously, as if he were a wounded animal.
“Give me the glass, Danny,” Dash had said. “You don’t need it. Just give it to me, I’ll hang onto it for you. I’ll keep it safe.”
He looked down, and blood trickled through his fingers, splattering onto the white tile.
It was red. Why was it red?
Crack.
Maddie’s voice faded back into his consciousness. “We just can’t risk it.”
“So what, your genius idea is to keep lying to him about why you won’t take the chip out? Feed him some bullshit excuse about the lab? Danny’s a human but he’s also a ghost! You can’t keep him from his core and expect him to turn out okay!”
“We know that.”
“No, you clearly don’t!”
“Keep your voice down, hun. He’s asleep.”
“Then stop lying to him. Tell him the real reason why you won’t give him Phantom back.”
Danny couldn’t breathe.
His parents. The people who had gone to court for him, who fought so hard to get him home, who assured him that they’d go to the moon and back if it meant keeping him safe. 
He trusted them.
And they...they just…
Crack.
“You know we can’t do that,” his father said. “You said it yourself, Danny’s just as much human as he is ghost. Ghosts don’t have the capacity to think rationally about something like that.”
They just…
“Kwan, get Lancer.”
He didn’t understand. Why were those two here?
“Please, give me the mirror, Danny.”
No, they didn’t get it. He needed this. This was the only thing he could do, it was the only way out. He couldn’t let Operative O take his body again.
“Danny...”
They were afraid, he realized. They thought he was going to hurt them. He was a rabid animal, wasn’t he? And they thought he would attack them?
Another drop of blood splashed onto the tile.
Crack.
Jazz scoffed. “I cannot believe you would just—”
“He’s fragile, Jazz!” Maddie protested. “Whatever happened in the government facility changed him. He’s not the same boy he used to be, something inside him is fundamentally different now. Frankly, we have no idea how that has affected his Obsession.”
His head spun.
They lied to him.
“What, so the better option is to just cut him off from his core altogether and force him to play human all day? Great plan, Mom.”
“If that’s what we need to do to keep him safe, then yes, that is the better option.”
The mirror shattered, the pieces raining down, echoing as they bounced against the tiles. He watched with unfocused eyes as everything around him crumbled.
His heart pounded in his ears, drowning out the arguing voices in the kitchen. He fell to the floor and clutched a broken shard. 
He needed...he needed to...
Protect.
Danny saw red. 
His lips moved before he could stop them. “I thought you’d accepted me.”
The argument from the kitchen came to a screeching halt. 
“Danny! I didn’t—”
“No!” Danny pushed himself to a seated position. 
They kept him from his core on purpose. 
His parents, after all those painstaking hours in family therapy, all that talk about how they were a team and how they needed to work together, had lied to him.
They weren’t a team. They had never been a team. Danny was just…
He was just a ghost to them.
An irrational, stupid, ectoplasmic creature. 
They scrambled from the kitchen, moving into the living room with fear strewn across their faces. 
They hate ghosts. You know this, Fenturd. They hate you.
“We do accept you, Danno. We love you.”
They didn’t love him.
“We were just trying to protect you. Please understand, Danny,” Maddie begged.
They’re scared of you. They don’t know what it means to protect. They’re lying.
“Danny, you need to understand—”
“SHUT UP!” Danny gripped his hair with his hands, covering his ears to quiet the hurricane of emotions devastating his mind. “Shut up, shut up!” 
He didn’t know whether to laugh, scream, or cry. After all this talk, his parents had never accepted him as a ghost at all.
“I’m so sorry, son,” Jack said.
“I can’t—I can’t!” Danny spat out. He had a thousand different responses swirling through his brain, so many things he wanted to say, but he couldn’t. His brain wasn’t working, his voice wasn’t working, and everything he saw was painted in blood.
They lied to him.
“I—you—”
“Danny, you need to breathe,” Jazz said, but Danny could recognize that tone. That was the same voice she used when trying to calm down the neighbor’s hyperactive dog that had a bad habit of finding ways out of its fence.
Danny ripped his head out of his arms, swiveling up to meet the concerned gazes of his family. “Shut up! I’m not a fucking dog!”
“Danny, I never—”
“Stop treating me like a fucking animal! I’m not—I’m not!” Danny attempted to grip the coffee table to push himself up, but he only succeeded in falling back onto the couch. He cursed and blinked away the mist that clouded his vision because he was not crying right now. His parents did not get to see that.
Maddie jumped forward. “Careful!”
“No, shut the fuck up!” Danny yelled. “You don’t get to—to be concerned! You don’t get that!”
Maddie stepped back, looking as if someone slapped her across the face.
“Danny, please, calm down,” Jack tried.
If anything, the red lining in his vision only deepened. “No! I won’t, and you don’t—don’t—ah!” Danny hit his forehead with his hand, frustration clawing at his throat.
There was so much he wanted to say, but he physically couldn’t get it out. He couldn’t stand, he couldn’t talk, he could only sit here drowning in rage.
His body was betraying him.
His parents could fix this right now if they wanted to. They could take him down to the lab, remove the chip, give Danny any semblance of freedom back. They could do that.
But they stood there doing nothing. 
They like you like this. Helpless. Grounded. Easy to control.
“You lied to me! You knew—you fucking—my core isn’t even damaged, is it?”
Jack wrapped his arm around Maddie, who hadn’t even bothered to wipe away the tears that had spilled on her cheeks.
Because of him.
They hate you. 
“Is it?” Danny pressed, but he didn’t need a response. He knew the answer. He knew the truth.
It was written all over his parents' faces.
“Was my core ever damaged? At all?”
“It was, but—”
Danny shook his head in disbelief. “Cores are self-re—self-regenerating. I—I knew that. I knew that! It—it was healed before I left the hospital, right?”
His parents refused to meet his eyes.
“You lied to me. All this time, and—and you...you just…” Danny tried to stand up again, but failed. “I’m so fucking sick of this!”
“Danny, please understand. We only did it because we needed to protect you.”
“Protect me?” He let out a sardonic laugh. “You thought—you seriously thought you were—you were fucking protecting me? Do you not...even see? I can’t—I can’t even fucking stand up! I can’t stand! I can’t do anything! And you thought you were protecting me? Are you serious?”
Jack’s lips thinned. “Danny, do you not realize how close we were to losing you? And I don’t mean to the government. You blasted a school mirror and then tried to use one of the pieces to kill yourself! I mean, come on, son!”
Danny lurched back, stunned. “I wasn’t trying to kill myself!”
“Then what were you trying to do, huh?” Jack shouted back. “Because not even a few hours after we dropped you off back at school, we get a call from Mr. Lancer saying a few students found you in the locker room threatening suicide because you thought you were back with the government! What do you expect us to think, Danny? We’re your parents.”
“Shut up!” Danny squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the flashes of memory that threatened to surface.
“Jack—”
“No, Maddie—”
They hate you. 
His throat burned. “Shut up!” 
It wasn’t fair. His parents weren’t being fair. That incident—that was a fluke. An anomaly. And yet they were punishing Danny for something that happened weeks ago, before he went through the painstaking ordeal of inpatient and psychiatry and the PHP and the whole other host of therapies he’d been forced into.
“What was the point in sending me to—to inpatient then? If you were just going to keep treating me like a stupid animal?”
“Danny, we’re not treating you like an animal.”
“You sure as hell got me caged up like one!”
“Don’t talk to your mother that way!”
“Jack, honey—”
“Everyone, please calm down!”
“Stay out of this, Jazz!”
“Danny, I think—”
“I don’t care what you think!”
“Guys—”
“I NEED MY CORE!” Danny screamed, the sob finally tearing its way out of his throat.
His family fell into a deafening silence, and Danny could feel their stares as ugly sobs overtook him, ripping down any semblance of an emotional wall he’d managed to construct over these weeks.
His tears boiled on his skin, and he dug his hands in his hair in a desperate attempt to ground himself. But it didn’t matter, his body shook uncontrollably, his emotions burning through his throat leaving him gasping for air.
All while his parents stood there ten feet away from him. Frozen, unwilling to approach. Because he was a halfa, a monster, broken, unstable, trapped, feared. He was the demon that parents warned their children about, the thing that his parents had dedicated their careers to developing weapons against, a creature so dangerous that the government had funded an entire group to research and exterminate.
And up until two months ago, it was legal for him to be vivisected, to be experimented on, to be tortured to the point of paralysis.
He rocked back and forth, struggling to piece himself back together. And when he could make it through a shuddering breath without breaking down again, all he could do was croak out, “Why…”
His parents remained unmoving, faces pale, arms by their sides. Tears streaked his mother’s and sister’s cheeks, and his father’s unblinking gaze bore down on him.
But their silence wasn’t good enough, their sorrow and tears weren’t good enough. An invisible wall was growing between them with each passing second and they couldn’t even see it.
They know. They’re doing it on purpose. They don’t care about you.
“Why?” Danny insisted. “How could—how could you...how could you do this to me? I’m...I just…”
“We had to, son,” his father said. The moonlight cast a shadow over his face. “It was for your own safety.”
No. Danny was done with the lies. Done with the excuses. 
He was done.
Flaring his eyes, he bit back, “My safety, or yours?” 
His parents flinched, and Danny couldn’t find himself to care. They’d lied to him, they’d dug their hole, so now they had to live in it.
“Danny, please…” Jazz stepped forward. “Don’t do this.”
“No! You—don’t you get it?” Danny pleaded. “I can’t—Mom, Dad, I feel like a prisoner. I’m trapped in my body. I can’t—I can’t live like this anymore! I can’t fucking do it! You have no idea...and you don’t even care!”
“Of course we care, Danno.”
“Then why? Tell me the truth! Please, tell me why because—” His voice broke, and his head fell back into his hands. “Please...tell me why…”
Jack sighed. “It was just the decision we felt we needed to make. It wasn’t easy, it wasn’t something we did because we wanted to hurt you. We love you, son. And we just wanted to know that you were safe.”
“We love you so much, sweetie.”
But they were blind because he wasn’t safe. And he was never going to be safe again. There would always be someone out there who had power over him, who wanted to control and erase him.
If they loved you, they would have listened.
They’re scared of you.
He glanced up to see Jack putting his arm around Maddie, pulling her in close. Jazz stood behind them, allowing their shadows to overtake her body.
Jazz said something, but Danny wasn’t listening. He didn’t care. He was trapped and completely alone. There would be no protests, no online petitions, and no jury on his side. No one to rescue him.
“Then give it—give me my core back.”
Jack shook his head. “I’m sorry son. We’ve made our decision.”
“I’ll find a way,” Danny insisted. “I know some ghosts. I’ll get them to—to take it out. You can’t...you—you can’t stop me.”
“Danny, I don’t think even Frostbite could—”
“You don’t know that, Jazz! He could—he could do it. He would figure it out if I asked.” 
His parents exchanged a look, one reminiscent of the exasperation when Danny would tell them that the detention hadn’t been his fault, that he did try to do the homework assignment, that he would try harder next time.
They didn’t believe him.
“He’ll do it,” he reiterated. 
“Danny, we’re not going to let any ghosts near you right now.”
“Like that ever worked before,” he retorted.
There was a pregnant pause, and Danny looked away. He felt nauseous, and anxiety speared through his chest.
“Please, I can’t—I can’t live like this. I can’t…” 
He knew how desperate he sounded, but for once he didn’t care. His parents were going to kill him by keeping his core locked up. 
Right now it was about self-preservation. If he couldn’t protect himself, it was over.
“Graduate from the PHP program first,” Maddie finally said. “Once you’re back in school, then we can talk, alright? We’ll talk about...about removing the chip.”
Danny whipped his head up, his eyes searching for any signs that she was lying, that she was going to pull the rug out from under him again.
But her face betrayed nothing.
“Graduate?” Danny breathed. “I just have to...graduate?”
“Yes. Show us that you’re okay enough to go back to school, and you can have your ghost half back.”
“I…” He tugged at his hair. “But that’s...that’s weeks…’
Maddie crossed her arms. “Those are my terms.”
Time slowed, and the distance between them only seemed to grow. He knew he was already behind leaving the PHP center that he was almost certain there was talk of shoving him back into inpatient.
But they didn’t get it. It wasn’t his fault, it was the government stalking him. It was Vlad. He had no choice, and he would never be able to graduate PHP. Not without his core.
“I—but—but, Mom. I need—”
“Son,” his dad said sharply. “I understand how difficult this is for you, but you’re not in a place where we can trust you right now. This is our compromise. Show us we can trust you, and you can have your freedom back.”
His eyes stung, and his throat was starting to squeeze shut.
No…
“Do we have a deal?”
This was impossible.
Even if Frostbite had a way of removing the chip, Danny had no way of finding him. Not without Clockwork’s interference, who didn’t seem to have any interest in contacting Danny as of late. 
The thought of Clockwork left a sour taste in Danny’s mouth. He hadn’t thought of the ancient ghost since his nights in the government compound, his body splayed out like a rag doll, shivering from shock. He remembered staring into the pitch black abyss around him begging for Clockwork to come help him.
But his calls were never answered.
Danny knew Clockwork could have freed him whenever he wanted, government ghost shields be damned. But he didn’t. And that made him just as guilty as everyone else.
And now Danny was alone, bound by his human physiology and his ghost hunter parents.
He had no choice.
“Okay. It’s—it’s a deal.”
---
His body was cold, dead, with waves of trembling coming in and out in spurts. Every breath hurt, and he wasn’t sure if it was because of the burning in his chest, the soreness in his throat, or the way the alien warmth in his core seemed more overbearing than ever. 
He could feel it, the hand reaching between his ribs, gripping his core with its warm, gloved fingers. It was revolting, violating, how the hands invaded his body, tearing off his skin and ribs as if he were nothing but a rotting carcass.
He felt dizzy. Lightheaded. He put a hand on his chest, crinkling his shirt in his fist. It was his core, he needed to protect it. 
But he was useless. Nothing. He was at the mercy of his parents who were all but holding a loaded gun to his head while telling him to trust them. Who lied to him that they accepted him, that they were there for him. 
That they loved him.
He was stupid, so stupid. After all the months of hearing them enthusiastically discuss the ways they’d love to rip him apart, what made him think they’d love him just like that? 
Their acceptance was conditional, and their conditions were impossible for him to meet. How the hell did they expect him to graduate from PHP and reenter society like a normal person while they were drowning his core like this? Did they not see how badly he was suffocating? How much he was screaming, thrashing in the ocean for air, desperately trying to fight the undertow pulling him further and further away from his sanity?
He wasn’t going to make it. He was going to fail, he was going to drown. He couldn’t do this.
But there’s one way, a small voice in his head whispered. You’ve done it before and you were fine. It helped you.
His eyes trailed over to his nightstand with his old model rocket sitting proudly on top. He had never flushed the oxycodone. 
Maybe…maybe…
It can help you again.
He just needed to graduate the PHP program and he would get his core back and then everything would be okay. He could work on his problems the right way later. The way he was supposed to be doing it, that he couldn’t do right now because he was still missing half of himself.
Two weeks. That was all he needed. Just two weeks worth of medication, and then he’d be on his way.
You need this.
He pushed himself up as if he were a puppet on strings. Everything was bleak, gray-washed and oppressive. Nausea rolled over him in waves and a hand gripped his throat, pulling the oxygen from his body.
The nightstand glowed in the moonlight, and like a moth Danny felt himself drawn closer to it. Tunnel vision took over, and the world morphed into a series of photos in a time lapse. Snapshot after snapshot flickered past his eyes until a hand—his hand—was pulling the drawer open to reveal an orange bottle inside.
You’re ready.
He couldn’t live like this anymore.
The fear, the anxiety, his core. It was all so much easier before, back in the hospital. Back when the only thing he had to worry about was what constellation he was going to draw that day. Back before he had to face the public, his family, or Vlad. Back before he knew that the government had his phone tapped and was watching his every move.
Back before he knew that his freedom was only temporary.
He was a sitting duck, a kid trapped in no man’s land with no weapon, no armor, nothing to keep him alive.
“Two weeks,” he whispered. Two weeks and then he would be okay. He would graduate from PHP, he would get to go back to school, he would become a regular person again. He just needed to get there first.
He opened the bottle and shook out a small white pill into the palm of his hand.
Two weeks.
Tilting his head back, he tossed the pill into his mouth, took a sip of water, and swallowed.
There. 
It was done.
---
Thank you @imekitty for beta-ing the fic as well as helping me organize my plot better!
Thanks for reading!
---
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anntoldst0ries · 3 years
Text
Coda (Ethan x MC)
Book: Open Heart 3, Chapter 7 Pairing: Dr Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr Noelle Valentine) Word Count: 3.1k Rating: 18+ (NSFW) Summary: Things got heated between Dr Ramsey and Dr Valentine during Bloom’s event. Will they finish what they’ve started?
Warning: This fic contains adult content, don’t read if you’re a minor.
A/N: Happy Easter, folks! So, let’s pretend this horror of a dress (which, let’s be honest, even Bloom’s PA wouldn’t wear) never happened. Also, this is my first time ever publishing NSFW fic, so please be understanding 🙈 That being said, I always appreciate feedback and am forever grateful for all of you, because you help me grow 💜
Huge shoutout to Bree @jamespotterthefirst who was so lovely to pre-read it and actually encouraged me to post, girl you are golden and I just cannot thank you enough! We are all so lucky to have you 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼😍
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Even though he was trying to be sensible about this, every molecule of sense left him during his left palm’s chance encounter with Noelle Valentine’s bare thigh.
But has anything about their touching bodies ever been truly accidental?
Although, if he was honest, this was just the culmination point.
His rational mind’s death by a thousand cuts.
It all started when she entered the premises of the venue in her provocative dress and he had to blink rapidly a few times, thinking that his eyes were deceiving him, breath trapped in his throat.
Cut.
Her every step gracious and light, as if she’s been the human embodiment of a wood nymph.
As if she’s stolen the world's entire allure.
Cut.
Her silky waves, cascading like a waterfall - he wanted to dive into them, lose himself in them.
Drown in them.
Cut.
She was a prodigy, a goddess descending from mount Olympus, who, for some mysterious reason, decided to grace the mortals with her overwhelming presence.
Some guests were standing agape, the others smiled wide and showered her with rain of compliments; a few people had tiny lightnings of jealousy flickering in their eyes.
But no one was left indifferent by her grand entrance.
Strangely, Ethan didn’t feel jealousy.
In fact, he couldn’t be more proud.
His eyes, like x-rays, have relentlessly been reminding him of the perfect shapes hiding under the layers of the sophisticated, silky material. In this regard, he envied everyone else. Unlike him, imagination was all they had.
He knew. He touched. He teased. He tasted. He caressed.
Sometimes, ignorance was truly a bliss.
Today, ignorance was certainly not going to help him get through this evening.
* * * * * *
He almost lost it on the balcony.
Then, the sudden appearance of musicians interrupted them.
He wasn’t startled.
He was angry.
Freaking Bloom and his jazz band, he thought to himself. How on earth was he constantly able to rain on Ethan’s parade, even when they weren’t physically in the same room?
Noelle’s pearly laugh dissipated all thoughts in an instant, her impossibly beautiful face now turned to him. Entwining their hands, Ethan knew he had no choice but to play along.
Inside, he was laughing out of the other side of his mouth.
They were coming back to the room full of buffoons and right now her presence was as comforting as it was driving him further into insanity.
Before he was even able to sit down, someone has already slipped a drink into his hand and when Ethan was ready to sigh and curse the fate that sent him to Bloom’s 4th circle of hell*, a sudden realisation struck him.
This evening wasn’t lost yet.
In fact, it wasn’t lost at all.
And as he was thinking, a small smile ran past his lips.
The answer was right there in front of him.
* * * * * *
“Dr Ramsey, you’re still here?” Ethan had heard the unwanted and all too loud voice, followed by an even more unwanted pat on the back, accompanied by his nemesis’ reddened face and alcohol breath.
He plastered a fake smile, mustering the remains of politeness.
“You didn’t strike me as a party type, I thought you’d be making excuses a long time ago.” Leland grinned like a Cheshire cat. For a second, an outsider could have almost thought these two hold each other in high regard.
Almost being the key word.
“This is the most pleasant surprise.” Leland continued. “You see, I am rarely wrong, so it’s one of these moments when not only am I wrong, but also being wrong actually makes me happy.” He laughed as if he’s just delivered the best punch line in the world.
“Well, we are representing the hospital after all and I wouldn’t be too much of an example if I left before the rest of my team.” Ethan put on his best charming smile, not without a superhuman effort.
You don’t play the game, you play the opponent, he reminded himself.
“It looks like we are finally agreeing on something, doctor.” A sleazy smile ran past his lips, as he left to mingle with another circle. Inside, Ethan shuddered. There was just something about Bloom that didn’t add up and he was yet to figure what it was… but now his focus shifted to something else entirely.
Just like he predicted (or diagnosed, if you will) with every sip, every passing minute, the guests were falling deeper and deeper into inebriation - the excellent staff made sure that every time someone emptied their glass, a new dose of liquid happiness was ready for them. Dr Ramsey knew this must have been Bloom’s doing.
They may have had money and resources but during these events, they were like wild animals held captive and then suddenly let loose. Their problem was that they thought money could pay for everything, but it certainly couldn’t buy back dignity, redeem bad manners and erase terrible first impressions.
Tonight, he will use this flawed logic to his advantage.
* * * * * *
Noelle was sitting across the table, not even trying to hide anymore that whatever the tech moguls were trying to sell, she wasn’t buying.
Neither their fancy apps nor their bullshit.
Ethan finished yet another glass of scotch and stood up, his height towering over everyone else at the table.
“Well, it’s about time I was moving. Thank you for a very… revelatory evening, gentlemen.” The other table occupiers didn’t even pay too much attention and murmured something, shifting their focus back to the beautiful female doctor. “Dr Valentine, can I offer you a ride home? That is, if you were planning to leave soon…”
“That would be great, thank you, Dr Ramsey.” If her eyes could speak up, they would have definitely thanked him for throwing her a lifebelt.
“Fantastic, meet me outside in 10 minutes then? I have…one more business to attend to beforehand.”
She wasn’t exactly sure what it was — the look, the pause between words, the accentuation - but something told her that whatever business he meant, she was very much a part of it.
Her suspicion has soon turned out to be justified, as his tall figure wandered off and disappeared around the corner.
A corner he had absolutely no reason to disappear around.
The younger doctor waited a minute before making her excuses and assuring her companions that a future partnership with Edenbrook couldn’t look any brighter, Noelle turned around and followed the man in black suit.
Walking as fast as her hurting feet and long gown were allowing her, Noelle entered a long corridor at the back of the fancy restaurant and had to admit that even this place, which must have simply led to different utility rooms, looked spectacular and stylish. Almost like those fairytale corridors, which lead to other dimensions.
But only if a voice summons you and guides you there.
Just as the thought popped into her head, a firm grip tightened around one of her wrists, making her jump.
When she turned around, his index finger was on his lips in a clear message.
Quiet.
They only made a couple of steps before he cautiously opened the door and rushed her into a room. It looked like a sophisticated pantry or a wine cellar and she thought the stock must have been worth more than her annual salary.
The room was dark, bar for the little window, which wasn’t much helpful with providing the light, given that the world outside was hugged by the arms of the night.
“Ethan, what’s goi—“ She never had a chance to finish the sentence, before he took her breath away with his lips, not for the first time this evening. He didn’t stop there, pushing her towards the counter, like a famished animal backing its victim into the corner.
“You said you’ll be looking for an encore, didn’t you?” She was trying to accustom her sight to the darkness, the gleam in the blue of his eyes her only reference point.
“Although, if I’m not mistaken and my opera knowledge is still sharp, I think coda** is actually the word you’re looking for.”
She stilled, a shiver running through her spine, the electric feel both hot and cold. An audible swallow filled the silence that lingered after his words, not for long as he continued his monologue.
“And I’m sorry, Dr Valentine, but I’m not a patient man today…I’ve exhausted all my patience on senseless endeavours this evening.” Almost as if to prove the sincerity of his words, he started moving towards her, his every gesture deliberate; there was no space for randomness.
Every word hit her like a wrecking ball, her remaining senses overkeen. She couldn’t rely on her eyes anymore and her hearing, smell and touch suddenly became heavily heightened, almost supernatural.
She couldn’t reflect on this for too long though, as he backed her further towards the counter, blocking her moves.
“H-how… how do you know no one’s gonna come in?”
Even in the dark, she could see the corners of his lips going up, in a smile which wasn’t affectionate. It was dark, almost sinister.
And hot as hell.
Ethan leaned into her and dropped his voice even lower than she thought was humanly possible, whispering straight into her ear.
“I don’t, but… my diagnostic instincts rarely fail me, Noelle Valentine. Plus… that’s a part of the thrill, isn’t it?” He paused for a second to gloat upon the effect his ministrations had on her. Dr Ramsey enjoyed controlling the situation - more than he’d care to admit.
“Look me in the eye and tell me you haven’t fantasised of this, of losing yourself in me completely… except you couldn’t, because of a tiny detail, a stubborn question in your pretty head… what if someone walks in on us? What if it happens when you are overwhelmed by pure ecstasy, knowing there is no coming back, that the only way is forward…”
Ethan knew immediately that these words hit the jackpot. If she wasn’t before, she was definitely shaking now, her treacherous body betraying her in all ways possible.
That’s how she knew all these months ago. Maybe her mind could, but her body could never lie to Ethan Freaking Ramsey.
Ethan’s hands started roaming her body, discovering his favourite promised land, as if he had not been touching her on that balcony earlier, as if he’d never touched her before.
Because for him, every time with her was first and last. And he hoped things would always feel this way.
“Who are you and what have you done to Ethan Ramsey?”
She couldn’t see the smirk that appeared on his painfully handsome face.
“If I were you, I’d be more worried about what’s to be done to you, Dr Valentine.”
With this, he lifted her up by grabbing her ass and sat her on the counter, pressing her back against the cold wall, which felt strangely warm against her body.
Or not so strangely, given there was a fire inside of her.
Securing her neck with his palm, he pulled her closer for a long, wet and greedy kiss, the obscene sounds of their mouths filling the otherwise silent space.
“Touch me.” A silent plea fell off her lips, her voice a quiet sob. Usually, he’d enjoy teasing her forever, playing little games, checking how far she would go to get what she wanted. But not tonight.
Tonight… he’s gonna give her exactly what she wants.
Because he wants it even more.
His middle and index finger slipped past the silky material of the dress and the band of her underwear. Noelle parted her lips slightly and drew a shallow breath, waiting in anticipation. Her wish was granted a couple of seconds later, when he ran up and down her folds, eliciting a small, guttural moan, which he was sure would forever be his favourite sound in the whole world.
Before she was even able to get used to the feeling, he pushed 2 digits into her without warning, making her eyes wide with amazement. But the movement stilled a second later. Maybe he couldn’t not tease her after all.
“Please.” The sound that came out of her was almost inaudible, yet extremely high pitched. Even if he tried, Ethan simply didn’t know the words that could come close to describing what these reactions were doing to him.
“You know I will give you the world… I will give you anything you want, Noelle. You just need to tell me what it is that you desire.”
She didn’t know what was the biggest turn on - his sultry voice dripping with desire, the feeling of his digits inside her or the well thought out choice of words. But it gave her an answer immediately.
“Fuck me with your fingers, Ethan.”
There was something shy and yet confident about the way she said it, he couldn’t explain it. Whatever it was, it made him even harder, which, at this point he thought wasn’t humanly possible. Although he was painfully aware of his own desire, he couldn’t rid neither her nor himself of the pleasure of watching her come undone on his fingers.
“As you wish, my naughty girl.”
His fingers started moving in come-hither motion, first slowly and teasingly. Just when she opened her mouth to beg him again, his thumb circled her swollen clit and pressed the sensitive bundle of nerves with precision, sending her mind into overdrive. She had to bite her own shoulder to suppress what she was sure would turn into a scream.
“Fuck… yes, right there.” She was an incoherent mess, while his fingers curved and touched places that made her eyes roll. “Faster, Ethan.” She commanded weakly as his fingers picked up the face, going in and out of her furiously.
She was pleading and moaning for god knows what and her hands were desperate to grip something, just anything.
Soon, he knew as well as she did that the peak was close, for her body kept moving and shaking on its own accord.
“I’m…this…you…” She cried, making even less sense than before.
“I know. Let go… let go now, Noelle. I know you needed this so much. Come for me now, baby.”
Sinking her teeth, this time in his shoulder, and tightening her grip on him, Noelle clenched around his fingers, the feeling so arousing that he thought he’s going to explode himself. He had to hold her with all the strength he had in his free arm, as she was all over the place, trembling, cursing, riding out what must have been one of the strongest orgasms she’s ever experienced.
When the feeling settled, Ethan slowly loosened his grip over her and slid his fingers out, bringing them to his lips. The taste of her astounded him every single time.
“In case I haven’t told you before… nothing can compare to the way you taste. Maybe apart from the way you feel, but I need to check to be certain.”
Before he was able to do so himself, she reached for his belt and unbuckled it hastily, letting his pants pool at his feet. Ethan hissed when she was ridding him of the last layer separating them, his throbbing member oversensitive to the slightest touch. He responded in kind, slipping her thongs down.
He stared at her as if he’s forgotten how to blink before saying:
“If I were you, I’d hold on tight.”
She grabbed the edge of the counter and tightened her grip, leaning onto her other arm, palm pressed flat onto the surface. Ethan positioned himself in front of her and the moment his tip met her sex, a wild lust overtook him completely, from top to bottom. He pushed hard, their bodies finally connecting.
He didn’t waste time to make himself or her feel comfortable. Right now, he wasn’t a guest - he was the invader, the intruder, the conqueror.
“Fuck, it’s impossible you’re still so tight.”
In answer, she clenched her muscles around him even more, earning herself a throaty sound.
“You little minx.”
She was going to be the death of him and what an epic death it would be.
“Ethan, fuck me like you mean it.” Noelle bit her lower lip, knowing the effect this tiny gesture always had on him. He didn’t need anything more. The sound of fast thrusts soon filled the air, making it thick and dense. The race started, two lovers chasing their gratification like it was the last thing they were ever going to do.
This wasn’t vanilla.
It was chilli, whiskey neat and flames.
A dance of carnal desires, intense and salient, leading to the grand finale. Nothing finesse, quite the contrary - a satiation of the most primal of human desires.
Ethan kept thrusting into her so deep that she felt blood when she had to bite her lip, trying to stop the animalistic scream trapped in her throat, begging to be released. She felt every vein, every nerve inside of her, every place he was reaching. Her hands and arms hurt, but her mind, currently controlled by Ethan’s cock moving in and out of her in killer pace, has overridden any physical sensations other than pure pleasure.
“So…so close.” She panted weakly, rolling her eyes as waves of pleasure kept crashing on her.
Leaning into her, he caught her earlobe and as he kissed her ear, Ethan groaned. “You’re so,” thrust, “fucking”, thrust, “hot”, thrust, “when”, thrust, “you come.”
And with that, she came.
Her whole body arched and hot white pleasure turned every cell of her body into bliss. It was like jumping into the pool on a sunny day, submerging yourself completely and then just… floating.
Ethan followed her instantly, her climax triggering his own. They were holding onto each other for dear life, compounding the intensity of their sensations and silently praying for this moment to never, ever stop.
When their breathing returned back to normal a few moments later, the older doctor pushed aside strands of her hair that stuck to her face and then cupped her cheeks.
“You ok?” The tenderness in his voice almost made her heart stop.
As if she hasn’t already been dead.
“Ok? No, I’m not ok. I am pretty fucking great.”
“That you are.” He smiled wide. “You are pretty fucking great.”
“Well you are not too bad yourself. How are you feeling?”
“I feel like I died and was reborn, all at the same time.”
They laughed at each other’s choice of words, still in a tight embrace.
“Ready for the next part, Ramsey?”
“Next part?”
“Now we need to sneak out of here for real.”
* * *
* This is a reference to Dante’s poem “Inferno” from “Divine Comedy”
** coda - The final part of a play, film, or narrative in which the strands of the plot are drawn together and matters are explained or resolved
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lena-in-a-red-dress · 3 years
Text
Notting Hill AU Snippet #6
When they finally leave her brother's house, Lena is simultaneously exhausted and wired. Exhausted, because even a good time takes it out of her, and yet wired because the world's most famous woman is right next to her on the sidewalk, nudging shoulders as they walk down the block. It makes for a heady combination, which is the only reason at all that Lena finds herself rising to Kara's challenge of climbing over a wrought iron gate to the garden beyond.
"For the record," she huffs, struggling to find purchase with her bare hands, "I am not dressed for this-- whoopsie daisy!"
What the FUCK did she just say?
"What did you just say?" Kara echoes, her smile audible in the dark.
"Nothing," Lena brushes off as she resets. "Just, trying to get a decent foothold-- whoops!"
She slips again, and this time Kara laughs, the sound loud and musical. "You said whoopsy daisy. Like some mid-century housewife--"
"You keep distracting me!"
"From what? Another whoopsy daisy?" Kara nudges her aside, dusting off her hands. "Step aside, miss priss. Watch the professional work."
Lena obeys, turning her head aside to avoid her nose brushing a very toned, very firm ass as Kara shimmied her way up and over the fence in one try. Lena's mouth goes dry at the smoothness of the motion, and the way Kara's arms strain against the slim cut of her blouse.
Kara may be an actress, but she's clearly no waif.
The woman in question grins at her from the other side of the fence. "You know, you say you're not intimidated by a silly rule, but I think there may be some subliminal hangups..."
Lena scowls. "Oh, like hell."
Boots scrabbling against the fenceposts, Lena hauls herself up through sheer willpower alone. By the time she lands on her feet on the far side, Kara has disappeared further into the garden. With a quiet curse, Lena brushes herself off and straightens her hair before trotting after her.
"Wow..." Kara breathes when Lena catches up. "It's like it's own little world in here."
Lena watches her observe the garden, noting the way her eyes sparkle in the faint light trickling in around them. The field they stand in is lush beneath their feet, and even in the dark the scent of fragrant flowers fills the air.
Kara makes her way over to a bench, and reads the inscription on. "To June, who sat on this bench every day. From John, who always sat beside her."
Lena smiles at the sentiment, and the way Kara's voice softens as she reads it. It's beautiful, and she says so.
"I guess some love does last forever," Kara remarks, half to herself. She sits on the bench, smoothing her hands across the wood as if to ask its owners for the privilege. After a moment, she notices Lena watching. "Come sit with me."
Lena does, and they spend the night with Kara's head on Lena's shoulders, looking at the stars.
---
The next night, they go on a proper date. Or at least they try to, except Lena can't find her glasses and Querl is absolutely no help in finding them, so she watches the entire movie through the prescription lenses of her snorkel mask.
Luckily, it only makes Kara laugh, even if it earns Lena a couple handfuls of popcorn in her hair from being pelted. Afterwards, Lena takes them to her favorite sushi restaurant, and makes a show of ordering in Japanese.
"Arigato gozaimasu," she finishes, handing over her menu. When she looks across the table at Kara, she's pleased to see she's impressed.
"Now how did you learn Japanese if you've never traveled?"
Lena shrugs. "I may have dated a few travelers in my day."
"Uh huh," Kara deadpans. "What else did they show you?"
Looking up, Lena lets a lascivious grin curl her lips. "Maybe I'll get to show you."
Lena revels in the fluster that marks Kara's acceptance of the sake that comes a moment later, and marks the red blush that heats under tan skin. The conversation shifts away, but continues, and Lena lets it, content with the impact she's made.
As the meal winds down, they linger a little bit, trading information they haven't shared yet.
"What's the one place you want to go, above all others?" Kara asks.
Lena sighs. "I don't know." Kara looks at her suspiciously, and Lena lifts her hands. "I could give you the same tripe I give any customer in my shop, but the truth is, the idea of travel has never really been the destination for me."
Kara looks surprised at that. "Oh?"
With a hum, Lena nods. "For me, it's always been more about who you're traveling with. And for a while there, I thought I had someone, but she never wanted to go anywhere. In the end, it turned out she just never wanted to go anywhere with me."
It still aches. Her split with Veronica had been so sudden, it split Lena's entire entire world apart. It had been bad enough to learn that Veronica had well and truly checked out of their relationship long before she ended it. To hear that Veronica had never really been in it in the first place had--
"Then she's an idiot," Kara says, bringing Lena out of her thoughts back to the present day. She reaches across the table, and links their fingers together. "And it's her loss."
Lena forces a grin. "Funnily, that's exactly what my therapist said..."
A round of raucous table from the table behind them drowns out whatever else she might have said. Glancing over, Lena registers a group of young to middle aged men in suits-- likely stock brokers, in this part of town. They were rowdy even when they came in, but now--a round of sake later-- they're downright obnoxious.
The next one who speaks doesn't bother to mind his words or his volume.
"Give me Kara Danvers any day."
Kara meets Lena's eye across the table, rolling her eyes as his buddy chimed in.
"Didn't like her last film. Fell asleep as soon as the lights went down."
"Don't care what the films like-- if it's got Kara Danvers, it's fine by me. I mean, have you seen that ass."
Lena's jaw clenches. Kara's hand slips away, as does her gaze.
"Oh hell yeah," another one continues. "And you know she's just begging for it. Never wonder how she got that gig in Dirty Dancing, did you?"
"It sure as hell wasn't because she could dance!" They all laughed. Lena shifts in her seat, blood boiling, but Kara catches her eye, shaking her head no. Too late.
Lena rises to her feet and marches to the offending table. "Excuse me, boys, but every single person in this restaurant can hear you. And while I'm perfectly happy to watch you reveal yourselves to be the absolute cunts you are, I take exception to the fact that you're talking about a very real person in the process."
The table stares at her, shocked.
"You." Lena glares at the worst offender. "Does your mother know you debase women with the same mouth you use to kiss her on the cheek? How about your girlfriend, though I find it incredibly doubtful you've managed to shag anyone with that kind of charm."
Kara tugs on Lena's arm, trying to pull her away. Lena almost goes, but turns back at the last minute, nearly colliding with the server hurrying in with the table's paid check.
"Actually, I'm not finished. Until each and every one of you learns a woman's favorite song, color and five year goal, you sure as hell don't get to wonder what flavor condom she prefers, you got it?" Her gaze lands on the platinum credit card in the ticket tray, and smirks in triumph when she sees it's a corporate card.
"And I'm sure that Lord Holdings will be thrilled to hear all about how their employees behave while they're out eating on the company's dime."
At that, the man she'd skewered a moment ago finally recovers enough to scoff. "Hah, and what do you care? What are you, her sister?"
"Actually," Kara speaks up, coming to stand beside Lena. "She's my date."
Dead silence follows as every single one of them registers who exactly is speaking. Finally, one of them tries to sputter an apology, but Kara waves it off.
"Oh, no, don't worry about it. I'm sure it was just joking between friends, just as I'm sure your dicks are the size of peanuts. Enjoy your dinner!"
With that, Kara turns away, snagging Lena's hand as she does. Allowing herself to be towed away, Lena flips them the vee and grins, then joins Kara in trotting out of the restaurant.
As soon as they hit the street they both start to cackle, drawing stares as they laugh maniacally. Lena's heart is pounding, as is Kara's, judging from the way she holds a hand against her chest.
"Oh, my god... I-- I've never done that before!" Kara laughs. "I don't know what came over me!"
"What, standing up for yourself? You're a natural!"
"No, you were amazing! I dunno, I just heard you and I saw you facing off against them all alone, and I just-- did that! I just did that!"
Kara laughs again, and Lena tugs her closer by the hips. Pressing a kiss to her lips, Lena smiles at her. "It looks good on you," she purrs. "You should do it more often."
Kara smiles back at her, rubbing her thumbs on the ridges of Lena's hips. "Maybe I will."
Lena could kiss her again, but Kara steps back, tugging them back in the direction of the hotel. "Walk me home?"
The walk back is spent in comfortable silence, but as they near the marquee of the Ritz, Lena's heart starts to pound for a whole new reason when Kara turns to her. "Wanna come up?"
Lena nods. "Yeah. I'd like that."
Kara gives a small of relief, and smiles. "Good. Give me five minutes."
The next five minutes are the longest of Lena's life. But she waits them, hands jammed into her pockets, and counts every second before finally allowing herself to head up to the room.
When she knocks, she isn't entirely sure what to expect. A robe, maybe, left open to reveal tantalzyingly firm abs. Matching lingerie, even, to match Kara's eyes.
What she doesn't expect is Kara fully clothed with panic in her eyes.
"You've got to go," Kara whispers.
Lena freezes, but keeps her smile in place. "Why?" she whispers back.
"Because my boyfriend, who was in America, is in fact here in the next room."
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