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factual-fantasy · 4 years

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I got 25 asks that took me WAY too long to reply to! :}

I have two top favorite episodes, the cone snail episode and the beluga whales episode.

When it comes to my favorite part of both episodes..?

..Not happy parts...

I have absolutely no idea what you just suggested.

(Referring to this post)

Thank you! That was the intention. :} I was worried that their faces all looked weird..

You want to learn more? Man.. maybe I should post that headcannon draft..

Yeah haha, this blog has taken quite the U-turn hasn’t it? I’m just glad everyone seems okay with it so far. <:} I’m excited for season 5 also! I hope it comes out soon! :D

THANK YOU, I WILL CHERISH THIS LOVE YOU HAVE GIVEN ME FOREVER

Yes and no.

Does he think of his crew as children? Absolutely not. They are all fully grown, intelligent and capable adults, and he darn well treats them like it.

But you bet that if one of them is in danger or is frightened, he’s dropping everything he’s doing and rushing to their aid as if they’re his cub that just wondered out onto the highway.

ME TOO! I always felt like he had this fatherly vibe to him with some professionalism sprinkled on top. Like he’s always looking out for his team because he cares for them and worries about them, but its kind of disguised as him just doing his job as the Captain.

I plan to draw more Protective Barnacles because its my jam, so don’t worry! That side of you will have some more fuel soon XD. And thank you for all the compliments! :}

Daww thank you, it twaz nothin. I’m just glad that people want to see my art.

Well, taking everyone into consideration, the tallest is Captain Barnacles, and the shortest is Tomminow. (This little guy 👇)

The Vegimals aside though? Peso is the shortest.

(And thank you! I’m glad :})

Honestly? Awful. I feel like absolute garbage, I just hope this will all finally go away soon.

Not really no, and no thanks on the cookies, I shouldn’t eat anything until I get super hungry because everything gives me stomachaches.. But a hug would sure be nice right about now.

I can give you a link to their wiki pages if that’ll help, I’m not really good with my words and you can learn everything you need to know about them there. <:}

Captain Barnacles (The polar bear guy)

Kwazii (The orange pirate cat guy)

Peso (The bby Penguin doktor)

Shellington (Tall Otter boi)

Dashi (Doge girl with skirt)

Professor Inkling (Fancy squik)

Tweak (Green bunny country gal chick)

The Vegimals (Little veggie dudes)

All the Gups (Metal fishes)

The Octopod (Momma metal squik)

Whos the youngest Octonaut? Well, if we’re not including the Vegimals, I’d say its probably Peso. And the oldest is most likely Professor Inkling.

Does anyone have claustrophobia? Yes! Captain Barnacles canonically does. He got trapped in a deep hole in some icy caves as a cub, since then he’s been afraid of tight and closed in spaces. I have extended on that fact and thought of many different scenarios relating to the aftermath of the Octonauts movie, but you know.. still not confident in all this Octonauts stuff so I haven’t posted my headcannons yet. <:/

Novelas translated into English means Soap Opera.

You think so? I feel like that’s not Kwazii’s thing, he’d probably like horror movies and action filled movies. But Peso probably would like them not gonna lie, him and Dashi would probably watch them together.

Well, in my draft post I’ve got two headcannons for her so far.

Tweak likes sleeping in the launch bay for the #1 reason that she can hear the water sloshing around in the bay. Which mimics the sound the water in the swamp used to make when she lived there with her Dad.

Tweak gets bad migraines when she’s sick, so the other Octonauts have to do a lot to accommodate her. Because the beds in the med bay aren’t that soft, she prefers to sleep in her room when she’s sick. But then the usually comforting sounds of the water in the launch bay become pain inducing. So the launch bay is emptied of all its water, the lights are shut off and, unless its an emergency, no one is allowed in the launch bay until she recovers.

I looked it up, and its true.

KWAZII WAS A GIRL IN THE BOOKS?? THEN WHY IS HE A BOY IN THE SHOW?? WHY DID THEY CHANGE THAT?? WH??? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like this Kwazii more than I would any other version of him, but still, WHY’D THEY CHANGE THAT?? IM GLAD THEY DID BUT WHY??

Hmm.. let me think...

Captain Barnacles most likely doesn’t ever have uninterrupted free time, and even when he does, he probably still prefers to be up in HQ where anyone can find him if they need him. But lets say for the sake of it that he has some free time and he takes it. He’d probably either want to play his accordion, or want to read a book.

I feel like there’s a lot of different things Kwazii likes to do in his spare time, but goofing around in the Gup-B is probably his favorite.

Peso probably likes to do puzzles and play his xylophone.

Dashi probably reads books while listening to music. How she does both of these things at the same time I have no idea.

Tweak probably plays video games.

Professor Inkling and Shellington both probably read books in their free time.

I’m not too sure what the Vegimals would do in their free time though..

Oh yes, indeed it does.

Before becoming the Captain of the Octonauts, Barnacles had to ask himself, “Am I really ready to be their leader?” Can he handle managing a team of that size? Can he react to situations fast enough and make the right choices? He thought it through and believed that yes. He was ready.

But he wasn’t. He wasn't prepared for that gut wrenching anxiety when one crew member goes missing. He wasn't prepared for the crippling heat that most everywhere else has compared to his home. He wasn't prepared to become so attached to his crew that the thought of something happening to them keeps him awake for nights in a row. He wasn’t prepared for that overwhelming nausea of missing home and his sister.

There was a lot he didn’t know. They’d all turn to him when something went wrong and ask if everything's going to be okay. He’d say “don’t worry, its all going to be okay.” but he’s just as unsure as everyone else.

Now don't get me wrong, he’s not this completely hopeless and unexperienced Captain that bit off more than he could chew, no. There’s just somethings he didn’t think about before becoming Captain of the Octonauts.

Now usually he can really keep himself composed almost always. He’s very level headed and very good at thinking his way through things, But sometimes? He just.. needs a break. He usually cant get a break because he’s the Captain and always needs to be alert, so everyone else that sees it usually tries to help.

Some crew members, like the Vegimals and Kwazii, have a habit of following the Captain around when they see that he’s tired to keep an eye on him. Others like Shellington and Dashi tend to give him space and keep things quiet for him. Some crew members, like Peso and Tweak tend to clean up around the place to take some weight off the Captains shoulders, they all help him out in some way.

Professor Inkling will sometimes find an excuse to pull him aside to have some tea with him. They’ll sit and talk for a bit but then he’s back up on his feet and back to work. This poor bear..

..hold on.. was this a drawing suggestion?

Dashi and Tweak would probably hang out in Dashi’s room and goof around. Not sure what they’d do.. maybe read, talk, play games or.. idk pillow fights? I don’t know what girls do on a girls night.

As for everyone else? I also am not sure, I don’t know what all those characters with all their clashing personalities would do on a boys night. Maybe they would all watch a movie? All attempt bake something obnoxious together? They seem like the kind of characters that would do that.

I’ve never been to a girls night or a guys night, so I don't really have much of a base to go off of.. but both groups would probably get together and do something they’d all enjoy. Guys maybe a funny movie, and the girls just talking and reading books? <:D

For real that’d be hilarious. Imagine if their voices were deep and gruff too but they just make them sound high pitched for fun?

Dude that’d be so funny. Like Kwazii’s up to his shenanigans again blabbering on about some sea monster or what have you, and Tunip out of nowhere just goes,

“Kwazii legit stop, we all know that you’re just talking about some ordinary sea creature that pirates interpreted as a sea monster.“

The whole crew gon be like

If this game existed in their world and they all played it.....

Captain Barnacles would make it through a pacifist run and would be satisfied. He’s some kind of weirdo who doesn’t think of characters as real people and doesn’t obsess over them and cry about them. Overall he thinks the game is pretty neat, but probably not his type of game.

Kwazii would want to test his skills by attempting a genocide, but his heart of gold would get in the way and he wouldn’t be able to complete it. He’d feel terrible for killing goat mom, reset and go hard pacifist next round. Overall he thinks the game is awesome.

Peso would want to talk to every character so they’d all be included in the story. He’d go full pacifist and cry over the story and its characters. Overall 10/10 for him.

Dashi would probably cry over the game a lot and would never attempt a genocide run because the characters are now her family.

Shellington would hate the fighting parts so would delay those bits by walking around and talking to characters over and over again.

Tweak would go through a neutral run because she sometimes accidently kills weaker monsters. Overall she loves the story and its characters, 10/10 would play again.

Professor Inkling would become invested in the story I bet. Complimenting the story arcs for the characters and its creative game play. But I feel like he’d only play it once and probably wouldn’t beat it, but would have fun with it none the less.

Thank you!!!♡♡♡ Man, I never expected such a positive response to switching to Octonauts, I cant believe everyone is so excited about it! I’m so glad you like my Octonauts art, that really makes me feel better and like what I’m drawing is worth while. ɷ◡ɷ

Aww I’m glad! And oh yeah, the animals at the end were always scary. Remember the Boo the spookfish?

Boo was a cute little googly eyed fishy boi who was just so sweet and somft until the creATURE REPORT AND I-

THAT’S MY QUE TO YEET THE COMPUTER

Dawww thank you!! I tried. <:}

#octonauts #my response #octonauts headcannons #octonauts spoilers

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dogcircle-scans · 4 years

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Natsume Yuujinchou: “Cookies to the Forest’s Entrance” Summary (Chapter 105)

Our cuties are back with more adventures!

I was trying to get this out within a week of the chapter’s release, but life happened so it took a while. ;w; Anyways, this is our first chapter after the 4 month hiatus! Perhaps to serve as a breather after the super intense Homura arc, we have a relatively short chapter (only 24 pages compared to the usual 30-40 pages) about Natsume, Tanuma and Nyanko-sensei stumbling into an old house in the middle of the forest. In some ways, this chapter felt more like a special chapter rather than a main one (don’t expect any plot or character development for this one, especially not information on the grandpa), but surprisingly, it also helps wrap up some stuff in the Homura arc (firstly, DID NYANKO GET HIS COOKIES, secondly, our poor cinnamon roll pure boi needs a hug ;w;). It still gives me the usual NatsuYuu feels, so no complaints from me! Also (I’m sorry for plugging), but if you enjoy what we do, and don’t mind giving a couple of dollars,

please buy me a coffee or two. At the moment I’m using my Kofi funds to buy raws of the manga for our scan uses, but after losing my Tumblr account, I haven’t had any new donations, so my tank is running empty (especially after buying the raws for Volume 25). ;w; If you have some spare cash and would like to help support our scan work, please help donate. You have my eternal gratitude. TwT As always, special thanks to Jessica for proofreading this for me on a Sunday!

- Niji

Chapter 105: “Cookies to the Forest’s Entrance”

While walking home from school, Tanuma accidentally steps onto a cookie, hearing it crack under his foot. He spots another cookie in the distance, and begins finding more and more of them the further he looks.

Tanuma: (It leads into the forest.) // This is just like Hansel and Gretel. / I wonder who dropped these…

Tanuma: ! // Natsume? Natsume: Huh… // Tanuma!? / Why are you in a place like this? Tanuma: You too, Natsume, what are you doing here…

Tanuma asks if Natsume might have been the one to drop the cookies, but it turns out Natsume didn’t notice the cookies at all. After recognising the cookies, he runs off, following its trail. Tanuma runs after him as well. At the end of the trail, they find a little house.

Natsume: Ah. // In a place like this… / Is it a vacant house? Tanuma: Hey, Natsume… / Do you know what these cookies are? / You looked like you were looking for something.

Natsume: …It’s nothing big. / I guess you can say I was just curious… Tanuma: Curious? Natsume: ——These cookies are…

Natsume recounts what happened shortly after he and Nyanko-sensei returned from Homura. Touko and Shigeru were extremely glad that he was able to find Nyanko-sensei, and gave Nyanko-sensei the cookies that they had kept aside for him (if you remember at the start of the arc, Nyanko-sensei wanted some pretty cookies but ran off before Natsume went to buy them). Nyanko-sensei was super happy about them too. However, when Natsume returned home from school that day, Nyanko-sensei was nowhere to be found in his room. Thinking that Nyanko-sensei might have ran off to play as usual, and that he might be going beyond Yatsuhara…

Natsume: I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and I figured it would be interesting to try following Sensei at least once… Tanuma: … I see… Natsume: ...Don’t laugh. Tanuma: Haha, I’m sorry. / So, at the end of these cookies will be…

Yes, it is Nyanko-sensei.

Natsume: Found him! Tanuma: Fufu. / There’s a hole in his bag. / So that’s how the cookies fell out.

Tanuma: *sigh…* ……Natsume? Natsume: ——As I thought, I’m still a little worried about Sensei. Tanuma: Ah… / That’s right, at the White Mist Pottery* Village, he caught the eye of a strange Collector……

[*I’m gonna translate “Hakka Pottery” to “White Mist Pottery”, since I can pretty much confirm that ‘Hakka’ is not a family name lol. So, for localization sake, I am translating the whole term.]

Natsume: …There was someone who reassured me, saying, “I’ll take care of this incident, so you don’t have to worry.” // He isn’t someone who would say things without thinking, so I did think that things would be alright now. / But when I didn’t see Sensei around like this, I can’t help but feel anxious. // ...But I’m glad.

Natsume looks around.

Natsume: I guess he found this vacant house and has been idling around in it. / …Seriously, he even brought his favourite sake and sake bottle with him. Tanuma: Wow… // It doesn’t look like anyone is here, and it’s quite wide. Rather than a residence, this is more like… an arbor?

Tanuma: It’s old, / but it’s pretty. // It’s perfect as a hideaway / or as a secret base.

Natsume: A secret base… / Then we’ve done something bad, haven’t we? Since Sensei has been secretly having fun here… Nyanko: *open!* Hm hm. / Natsume and… the Tanuma brat. Natsume: Ah! Nyanko-sensei! // I’m sor- Nyanko: You came here with perfect timing. Help me out. Natsume: Huh!?

Nyanko-sensei explains that he discovered this place while chasing butterflies during his patrol. He figured that it would be the perfect place for him to take his afternoon naps, and was just in the midst of checking it out. The only issue is that the place is rather dusty, and Nyanko-sensei doesn’t have the spare time to clean the place up as he likes.

Nyanko: I’ve brought some dust cloths with me. / Just wet them in the river over there. Natsume: What— Nyanko: If we don’t at least clean this veranda, you two won’t be able to idle around either, right?

And just like that, the boys got to work.

Natsume: Geez~~~ *wipe wipe wipe wipe* // This house may be vacant, but it might have an owner, so don’t just do whatever you like, Sensei. Nyanko: Come on! / Put your backs into your wiping! Boys: Phew~~ // We’re finally doneee—

Completely exhausted, they plopped down onto the veranda, and had their rest. And as they closed their eyes—

Natsume: (What is this?) / (There’s some sort of sweet fragrance coming from somewhere.) // (Is it Sensei’s cookies?) / (No…) // (Maybe it’s flowers.) / (——It’s very) // (kind and sweet——)

Soon enough, Natsume notices that evening has already arrived, so they prepare to leave.

Nyanko: By the way, how did you two learn of this place? Natsume: How? Because your cookies had fallen out, Sensei. Nyanko: WHAT!? // *stunned* There’s a huge hole… Natsume: Shall we pick them up on our way home, Sensei?

Nyanko: …… / No, just leave them as they are. // We still have lots of maintenance to do. / Tomorrow, you two will follow this trail back to my afternoon napping spot. We will gather there.

[Did Nyanko just… sacrifice his cookies!? Omg!]

Natsume: “Maintenance”……? Tanuma: Haha, I’m sure birds would have eaten them by tomorrow, Sensei.

The following day, the two boys find the trail of cookies and arrive at the empty house.

Natsume: We’re here. Nyanko: You two are so slow! / You’re gonna be devoting yourselves to the maintenance of my drinking party spot! Natsume: Wasn’t this your afternoon napping spot? Tanuma: ——Huh? Natsume. / There’s something on the pillar there…

Indeed, on the pillar was a hand-written note, saying,

“Thank you for wiping the place. Please enjoy yourselves here.”

Natsume: Uwah! / It’s probably from the owner. (S- So embarrassing…) Tanuma: I wonder if it’s okay to just take advantage of their offer like that. / Even though we entered as we liked… Nyanko: Stop complaining! Today, we are wiping the sliding doors! / I want the moonlight and the evening sun to shine on it beautifully.

Natsume: …As an apology for Sensei coming in as he liked, we should at least clean the frame of the sliding doors. Tanume: Let’s do that. Natsume: You help too, Sensei. Nyanko: Hmph. / Just this should be enough, right?

Or so they thought.

Nyanko: *rip…*

Stunned by the tear, the two boys inspect the damage. Natsume asks if it can be fixed, and Tanuma figures that, if they bring some sliding door paper and glue tomorrow, it should do the trick. Natsume returns to the note on the pillar, and quickly jots down an apology.

“Sorry, we tore the sliding door. We will fix it tomorrow.”

Back at home, Natsume asks Shigeru for some sliding door paper.

Shigeru: ...Hm? Sliding door? Natsume: Yes… // Can I have enough for one grid? / We were staying at a place and we kind of… tore it. Shigeru: Oh. / Were you at the Tanuma’s? Natsume: Ah, no. Shigeru: It’s okay to be mischievous, but you have to keep it in moderation.

Shigeru: If it’s at home, you can break as many as you like, // but always make sure to apologize, alright, Takashi? Natsume: …… Yes.

[Shigeru is such a good papa ;w;]

As Natsume leaves the next day, Touko stops him, handing him some strawberries.

Touko: Here, give them these strawberries as an apology. // *rustle!* Do your best! Natsume: ——… // Thank you so much. Nyanko: Oh~~~ These strawberries look tasty~~~ Natsume: They are not for you, Sensei.

[And now we have our sweet mama TwT]

They continue to follow the trail of cookies (how have they not been eaten by animals yet??), during which Natsume asks if the owner might be there. Nyanko-sensei promptly answers that he doesn’t need to care so much about an uninhabited empty house.

Natsume: Don’t you start, Sensei. Tanuma: Oi, Natsume—

The three of them head to the house, and find that a new note has been attached to the pillar.

“Thank you for cleaning the sliding doors. I have a request. Could you help me plant these seeds in the garden?”

Natsume: Huh? // By ‘seeds’, do they mean this? // …They don’t sound angry. Tanuma: You fix the sliding door, Natsume. / I’ll clear the weeds over there and plant this. Natsume: Thank you, Tanuma.

Natsume: …… // (The owner of this house sure is strange…) // (Rather, it feels like…) // Hey… Nyanko-sensei…

Nyanko: HEY! / ENOUGH OF THAT! HURRY UP AND BRING OUT THE PAPER! // Let’s paste it down right away. It’s time to repair my afternoon napping spot! Natsume: ——… Yeah. // You’re right.

The three of them set down to work, and finally finished everything. Once again, exhausted, they plop onto the veranda and napped.

Natsume: (Nevertheless…) // (This is such a comfortable place——)

In his dreams, Natsume hears a man speak, and the thoughts of someone else…

Man: “——Hey there. Sorry to keep you waiting.” ??: ——It’s alright. // Always, / forever, // I will be here, waiting for you.

Natsume wakes up.

Note: As an apology, we have left some strawberries here. Tanuma: It’s quite a mysterious arbor. // It’s like we are exchanging letters with the house owner. Natsume: That’s true. Tanuma: ——Hey, Natsume. Natsume: Hm?

Tanuma: ...Nah. / See you tomorrow. Natsume: Yeah. // See you tomorrow.

And that night, Natsume had a dream.

Natsume: (There was a gentle-looking man sitting alone on top of the veranda.) / (And around him, perhaps it was the flowering season… There were so many colors as though it was overflowing with it.) Man: Ah, my beloved arbor. // I can only visit you once every year. / I can’t even maintain or take care of you. Please forgive this useless owner of yours. // This year, I’ve been busy with my family business as well. / The days where I come here provide emotional support, so I always look forward to it. // Ah, / the view here is so beautiful. // I built this here hoping that someday, / I could bring my wife, my children, and my family here to view this scenery. // But after so long, it has always just been me.

Man: I’m sorry. Even though I built you, // I’m always here alone. // I’m sorry I couldn’t make it lively. // ——Someday, // should // guests arrive here——

Natsume wakes up. The following day, he meets up with Tanuma again, and they follow the trail of cookies into the forest. Natsume wonders about all the strange things involving this situation, about the forest that was so close to his house and yet he doesn’t know much about it, about these cookies that still look great even after so long, and about the mysterious owner who never shows his face. And when they arrive at the arbor—

Flowers had bloomed across the garden.

Tanuma: What!? / Flowers!? // …This can’t all be / the seeds I planted yesterday…? // Just how did… Natsume: ——I’m guessing // this arbor made all of them bloom.

Tanuma: Huh… SFX: *rustle*

The one who wrote notes to thank them for cleaning the floor and the sliding doors might have been the arbor itself. With its memories of bygone days, it’s always been here inside the forest, waiting.

Natsume: You finally have guests coming here. / But I’m sorry that it was us.

This was such an old, old little arbor, and it felt as though it was mustering the last of its power to show them this scenery.

Nyanko: Ooh, there are strawberry flowers here too. Natsume: Tanuma. / Why don’t we take a seat at the veranda and look at this scenery for a bit? Tanuma: Huh? Natsume: Somehow, / I feel like we won’t be able to come here again tomorrow.

Tanuma: ———……… // I see——… Natsume: (——I wonder if there are buildings that can become ayakashi too.)

That was the mysterious arbor that Nyanko-sensei found. It was only a short while, but it was where two people, one beast, and another certain someone, had spent their time together. As they take a seat on the veranda, Natsume recalls the words that the owner had said in his dream.

Man: ——Someday, // should guests arrive here…

Man: Make sure to welcome them with lots of flowers, alright?

It was a beautiful and lovely, secret arbor.

“Cookies to the Forest’s Entrance” END

#natsume yuujinchou #natsume's book of friends #summary #tanuma kaname #Natsume Takashi #Nyanko sensei #natsume manga spoilers

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takadanobaba · 3 years

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Jin Norizuki’s Birthday PriZoom 7/18/2021

Oh the things I do for Jin Norizuki

That was SUCH an experience. I had a lot of fun!!

Main takeaway is that I am now acutely aware of when to YO in a song

(Okay so this is my first time attending a prizoom (or even any kinpri screening outside of Luna’s sss rabbit sessions!) so this is all entirely new to me and I can’t really compare it to much, but I figured that it’d be good to write up a report of sorts to fill in for Luna in a way!)

The prizooms are also accessible to everyone and don’t require any Japanese info confirmation!! If you’re interested in attending please go and support kinpri!!!

(Note: I think about Jin wayyyy too much and interpret them as nonbinary, so I use they/them pronouns for Jin. It’s just automatic for me at this point and feels weird otherwise haha so I’ll be doing that in this)

Jin is my all time favorite character and love of my life who I’m extremely delusional about so when a prizoom was announced for their birthday I went INSANE because I didn’t expect Jin’s birthday to be acknowledged AT ALL given how they’re usually excluded/treated like a side character (+ kinpri’s been putting out little to no content lately anyways....haha....). I was waiting in anticipation ever since it was announced (around June 6th) and even put in a time-off request for my work the day of its announcement just so I could attend!!!! ........ You can imagine my frustration at kinpri waiting until the very last minute to put out details about Jin’s prizoom ^^;

💙 💙 💙 💙 💙 💙

Also!! I’m a complete ~ foreigner ~ and managed to get tickets perfectly fine with my American credit card (and putting in some very obviously Not-An-Actual-Resident-Of-Japan address info...)! So if anyone’s curious about attending a prizoom but worried about region-locking, it’s possible! Very possible! If you’re interested in it, please go! You don’t need to have a Japanese phone number/credit card/address/etc. to purchase PriZoom tickets on RakutenTicket! It’s such an experience! If you need any help buying tickets then I’d be more than happy to assist!! Please support the PriZoom screenings and help increase the demand for more kinpri content!!!!!!!!!!!! I will personally become a living prizoom advertisement

(Also if any kinpri staff find this: I’m sorry for not respecting rules this time but I just wanted to provide a detailed account of the prizoom event and encourage participation for other foreign fans! I won’t do this again!!!)

💙 💙 💙 💙 💙 💙

I only attended the first and third showings (consisting of the first movie and Over the Sunshine!) because I wanted to see the new/not currently archived content (the second/pride the hero showing’s bonus was just Jin’s birthday video by Joji which I already revisit little too much ahaha). I also went to the chat-only rooms because I wasn’t very confident that I wouldn’t be awkward with my nonexistent cheering experience and intent to just observe what its like (despite knowing that the cheering rooms are more fun based on what Luna said haha). That, and I was planning on using the EXTREMELY OBNOXIOUS soundboard of ABSOLUTE CHAOS for everything since I have issues with voice dysphoria and figured it’d be good to stick to the room with that normalized as the one and only cheering method so participating would be a little less annoying to others, since we’d all have the same idea ^^;

I’m more active on twitter and follow/am mutuals with pretty much anybody who likes Jin enough to post about them, so it was cool seeing almost everyone there! At least half of them tweeted about this being their first prizoom haha. Jin’s birthday was also promoted as a good introduction to prizooms since the first showing was set at a price point of 718 yen instead of the usual 1,760 yen? So, lots of first timers attending! I guess most people had the same thought process as me about the whole insecure-about-not-being-used-to-proper-cheering/using-their-mic thing? Because most of my twitter following ended up in the chat-only rooms with me! Fun!

Also interesting how most people chose the male voice option for the cheering soundboard feature since there’s actually only 2 men who love Jin like that (I’m included in that number!!) in the Jin-obsessed twitter circle. I guess it was because it sounds kinda Joji-ish? and therefore fitting for an event dedicated to Jin! What with them being meant for each other and all.... Plus being Joji is just a fun way to play off having issues about using your own voice (I... project onto Joji a lot.)

👆 👆 👆

Okay I actually typed up all of the above during the second showing (since I wasn’t occupied attending that one) and everyone had the same train of thought and was definitely being Joji. You know that one “song” in Over the Sunshine- Glorious Schwarz- consisting of Joji just going wild infodumping for 3.5 minutes? Yeah EVERYONE who selected the male voice option was spamming 「おれもー！」/ “ME TOO!!!” during that (including me!). So it was like:

“I weighed 4646 grams at birth! ☆”

“MMMMEMEEMEMMT MEE ME MEEE EMME ME ME TOO M M ME TOO”

SO OBNOXIOUS. I LOVE IT. EVERYONE SHARING THE SAME BRAINCELL. THE JOJI BRAINCELL.

💙

The highlight of the prizoom (in my opinion) was when some guy repeatedly hit よっ！/ YO! to the music in the first movie, which then led to everyone having a collective ~ Realization ~

After that happened, everybody joined in and started YO!-ing along in the other lives. Beautiful.

(Blurred recording of Dramatic Love and Showcase Night just so YO!u can see what I mean.)

(I only did those two to test screen recording after failing to archive the first Jin bonus while using the soundboard feature in the first showing, initially I didn’t intend to record anything but the bonuses and will not be doing that anymore. If you attend, don’t be like me or worse!!!! Please!! I’ll delete these if needed/after a few weeks. Also just wanted to mention that Koi no Royal Straight Flush is up there in Kinpri’s Most YO!-able songs)

I love this soundboard feature. Sounds like hell. Prizooms are truely a new form of art because of it. Amazing how cheering screenings have evolved over a pandemic. Music feels empty to me without the YO!s now. After this I ended up listening to the entire kinpri discography so I could determine the YO!ability of each song. Not sure if every prizoom is like that? But I really want to go to more showings just for the community experience! I’m morbidly curious as to how many people would try to YO! to Platonic Sword. I considered going to Rei’s because they’re showing Shiny Rose Stars, but I probably won’t though since money and sleep are things (They really should make tickets no more than 1,000 yen.... they’re zoom meetings with audio problems....THE AUDIO ISSUES ARE FUN THOUGH! YOU CAN SPAM “GANBATTE” WITH EVERYONE!!) Plus while I do like every kinpri character, none of the street boys are really my favorites and going to every showing regardless of character would be a lot. I assumed that I was only going to try attending Joji’s until they announced that they were gonna do something for Jin!! So if you want to see what it’s like PLEASE get tickets and experience it for yourself!! It’s so much more fun participating !!!! Relying on 1-2 people to post event summaries isn’t exactly consistent coverage of every prizoom either!

\ よっ！/ \ よっ！/ \ よっ！/

So much of this is a community experience that you just have to see for yourself! It’s really cool seeing people go all out for their favorites and just going wild. Notable participants include:

- Two separate people just working out the entire time (one of them doing “Prism Exercise” meaning very high effort full-body cheering and dancing? It was really impressive seeing them go all-out for such a long time!)

- Two (2!) Ai cosplayers!!! One attending the prizoom with a Jin cosplayer!!

- The lady who cosplayed Jin in their cute green pre-retirement prism star outfit WITH A HUGE JIN PUPPET IN THE SAME STYLE AS THE SHUFFLE PUPPETS IN THE STAGEPLAY!!!

- That one person who just had a Minato fish head on the entire time (?!)

- A Victoria cosplayer who showed off a really nice!! drawing of Jin they did during the participant showcase at the end of the screenings

- The person with a REALLY CUTE!!!!! homemade Jin plushie!!

- Two people who attended with 3D/vtuber style models of the Go Go Glorious! (YMT29 subunit) members: Noel Tokyo and Mikado Shibuya (who also had a model of Ai!)

- A really cute Joji vtuber model!

💙 💙 💙 💙 💙 💙

The bonuses were Jin’s birthday video from 2016 and a birthday message of sorts from Jin!

I actually didn’t manage to properly archive the first one as intended because things went horribly wrong so I ended up with nothing but just a terrible (said affectionately) little recording of the soundboard I linked earlier. But whatever I shouldn’t be doing that anyways. Hopefully kinpri includes that and the other prizoom bonuses in something later.... the thought of any content being stuck as lost media terrifies me. I don’t have a good enough memory or a high enough Japanese proficiency level to type it out but it wasn’t particularly analyzable or anything (telling that to myself to make me feel better about losing it). Just the usual Jin being dramatic and going on an evil monologue. Jin being evil ASMR. I lovingly burned another one of Jin’s evil laughs into my mind too so there’s that.

For the 3rd showing bonus however I did not fail though it’s arguably the less interesting bonus of the two since it’s unvoiced. I really love Jin’s voice. Big sexy. Actual dialogue is pretty similar to each other from what I’ve gathered (ending with one of Jin’s cute little アーーーッハッハッハッ！！！！！’s (the text effect for the unvoiced bonus was an appreciated detail!).

(I’m not very confident in my ability to provide a good translation so I’ll just not embarrass myself)

�� AAAaAAaHAHAAHAAa ~ ! ! ! ! ! ! ! “

💙

Yes Jin I’ll support you in the future-!!! ヾ(>▽ <、 )

I’ll never not be obsessed but it’d still be nice to have more substantial content to gush about and do that with.... Kinpri come back and release an anime continuation.... give me the Jin plot development....kinpri come back my happiness is a little too reliant on you

After the showings you get an email asking for feedback which is cool! I’ve been waiting to complain about how 法月 is written as Noriduki instead of Norizuki for the longest time but I never had a chance until now haha. Makes it so painful for me to buy Jin merch. Also begged for an anime continuation. I wonder how much they take into account feedback? I guess I’ll see when/if they start writing Jin’s name how it’s supposed to be.

ANYWAYS

IF YOU WANT TO GO TO A PRIZOOM, DO IT!

Prism shows really are best experienced with a community!!! If you like kinpri it’s a GREAT OPPORTUNITY to experience what a cheering screening is like with the Japanese fanbase from the comfort of your very own home which is most likely nowhere near Japan!! Everyone should experience prism shows!!!! I have no regrets and I’m still so hyped from the prism sparkle!!!

ANYBODY CAN ATTEND AND BUY TICKETS EVEN WITHOUT JAPANESE INFORMATION!!!

\\ GLORIOUS SCHWARZ! //

#king of prism #jin norizuki #Err try not to spread around my recordings too much #Dont want the staff thinking badly of foreigners and region locking things haha #Kinpri_pr didn't even blur out their recording of the prizooms like me and they record everything for promo purposes anyways #But I'll probably remove mine after a bit anyways #me and my very concerning crush on jin #using joji as a self insert

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mike-wachowski · 3 years

Text

fic writer review!

thanks for the tag @thebluewritingbench and @mssirey :D

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

just 6! im an ao3 baby lol

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

something like 31k?

3. How many fandoms have you written for?

2 officially (wynonna earp and supercorp) but i used to write some Carmilla stuff back in 2015/16 (all lost to the wind now)

4. Top 5 fics by kudos?

first up: you can tell a whole story with a taste , my rivals chefs au that lives in my head rent free

second: i’ve been selfish, i’ve been wrong , my angsty ass 6x08 supercorp phone call scene write

third: you have stolen my heart (now don’t go away) a wayhaught 1920s au where nicole is a hot genderqueer cryptozoologist and waverly is her anthropologist gf

fourth: my tumblr shorts dump XD. ao3 home to the l-truck au.

fifth: goodbye & hello , an angsty oneshot about nedley dying and nicole dealing w that.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?

I try and respond to every comment on my fics if im currently working on it/posting it. i have let some slip just because theyre on fics i havent updated in like... 5 months lol

6. A fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending

i mean, someone left this comment on i’ve been selfish, i’ve been wrong...

7. Do you write crossovers?

nope! i do have this kinda crack idea for a fic thats nia & brainy joining the legends of tomorrow crew after the supergirl finale tho.

8. Ever received hate on a fic?

i dont think so? i have had people compare my fics to other fics though, which is not super fun lol

9. Do you write smut?

haha nope ! that is not my vibe lol. i major respect the folks who do though!

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i sure hope not!

11. Ever had a fic translated?

nope!

12. Have you ever co-written a fic?

no, but im super open to it if anyone wants to link up 0_0

13. All time fav ship?

honestly, idk if i have one! but im forsure loving supercorp rn.

14. WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

i’ve been working on this supercorp cyberpunk au for MONTHS thats kicking my ass. every other week i abandon it and then three days later i come crawling back...

15. Writing strengths?

i think probably my fluff writing? a lot of folks say they like the way i write domesticity, fluff and soft stuff

16. Writing weaknesses?

i feel like i have a hard time writing emotion sometimes? also romance. i can write everything up until the second before characters kiss, and then when they do its:

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

i probably wouldn’t feel comfortable with it without a native speaker helping me out.

18. First fandom you wrote for?

Carmilla. I actually wrote alot of Hollence stuff (i know, its a crime) but i had a friend who really liked them as a pair so i mostly wrote for her XD

19. What’s your fav fic you’ve written so far?

its probably a toss up between rival chefs au and the l-truck au (simone qiertz Kara my beloved)

okie dokie ! everyone who i would tag has already been tagged XD so im just gonna tag anyone reading this who wants to do it! tag me back so i can read ur responses :D

#mike speaks #mike writes #mike does tag memes #mike talks in the third person #okay im done

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shintorikhazumi · 4 years

Text

A Real Girl Chapter 2: Feelings 2.0

A/N: Just like my other story in LWA (that I can’t focus on huhuhu), I’m composing this update while in the hospital, watching over my dad. There isn’t any internet so I guess I can focus quite a bit haha. I feel like the pacing of this chapter is off, or awkward somehow? I should’ve extended the first chapter more. Welp, too late for that. I guess I’m trying to expand the background information on how this universe works? It’s quite close to canon-verse where Sayo used to not really get along with everyone, and slowly improving lately, but tailored to the Sayo of this story??? I’m braindead, I’m sorry hahaha.

Enjoy?

~Shintori Khazumi

A Real Girl Chapter 2: Feelings 2.0

Sayo did not like having feelings.

It wasn’t that she hated all the mushy drama that came alongside it. It wasn’t that she particularly disliked the anxiety of having negative- and even positive- feelings. No, it wasn’t that at all.

She simply didn’t fancy the complications it brought to her practical lifestyle. She had yet to fathom such things, and more often than not, her system could not process the actions and reactions brought about by emotions. Moments when she did try only ended up in the usual overheating, and sometimes confusion and jumble of information running through her head, always rendering her unable to organize the sensory data she was receiving from her body.

She just couldn’t seem to handle all that. It was a system overload. Something she couldn’t hope to control. And control was what she understood she needed; control over this life of hers. If she could not contain the wild horses that were feelings, she could not live her life to its realest, most authentic capacity. That was what she believed. And she believed that Sayo Hikawa was incapable of having feelings.

-//-//-//-//-

The dinner that followed her regular meeting with her parents had been… fine, Sayo supposed. It wasn’t all that awkward. To her it wasn’t, at the very least. She tried to scan her other family members for any signs indicative of discomfort, and upon finding nothing unusual, she had released a small sigh of relief that did not go past her surprisingly perceptive sister.

Hina then asked her if anything was wrong, to which she would reply her usual assurances; that she was fine and there was nothing to worry about, offering a calm smile before proceeding to eat her food to hopefully signal to the younger twin that this particular conversation was over.

Hina understood and seemed willing to relent, dropping any plans of further interrogation. She instead turned to her parents, continuing one of her many ridiculous tales. This one happened to be of how she may or may not have tried to convince the school principal to go bungee jumping with her off the school’s highest building, which was probably what had been the cause of this week’s call to the office for her parents.

Sayo felt her facial muscles work to form a small smile outside her manual prompting. Something deep down inside told her it was because she was amused with her younger sister’s antics. Quite an uncommon occurrence as Hina’s antics were usually nothing short of headache-inducing.

“Feeling quite cheery, aren’t we Sayo?” Her father piped up, noticing the smile on his eldest daughter’s face. Albeit miniscule to some, to her family and friends, it was a clear indicator that Sayo was in a pleasant mood, and that made them happy as well.

For some reason, having her whole family’s attention on her made her feel warm. Warmer than “normal”. Oh, this was troublesome. Sayo had been having these heat flushes far too often lately, it truly was messing with her system.

“N-no? I… or, yes, I… I suppose I am not in a foul mood, Father.” She responded, rigid as ever, but with a stutter she inwardly cursed at. Was she experiencing lag?

Despite her words, her family had gotten used to her responses and translated it as a positive ‘yes’. That was good enough in their books.

The rest of dinner remained clear of any suspense, and each Hikawa was grateful for that.

Hina had volunteered to tidy up the kitchen afterwards as their parents were preparing to take their leave, so Sayo was left with the task of seeing the pair off by the door.

…

There were a few moments of tense silence as Sayo watched her parents. Her father avoided her gaze by leaning down to tie his shoelaces, the action taking a little too long compared to the average time; while her mother was the complete opposite, staring a little too intently back at her. She didn’t know what to make of this situation. Her sensors picked up body language cues that translated to them having something they still wanted to say before leaving, but the longer they took to make even a squeak, the more Sayo wondered if they were all just burning away the precious seconds that could have been spent on safe travel for her parents, and dedicated guitar practice for Sayo. She would have preferred spending her time wisely, even if it was a Saturday night. She had band practice tomorrow, after all.

“Sayo-“ Her father had finally began, reaching a hand up above the said girl’s head. Sayo felt her heartrate pick up, eyes glued to the motion, waiting, before her father retracted it back to his side. The action brought about a physical weight increase in Sayo’s chest area, and she almost asked her father about it; but the question died before even leaving her mouth, a different hand catching her off-guard.

Her mother had cupped her cold cheek with her warm hand, eyes glistening somewhat, searching for something Sayo could not figure out.

“Mother?”

A beat of silence.

“We really do love you.” The older woman whispered, still looking into Sayo’s eyes, still searching, not knowing if she’d find what she sought. “We really do.”

Sayo had no idea how to respond to the sudden affection, and simply nodded her head silently. What she did know was that what had previously weighed in her chest seemed lighter, though not completely gone-

That familiar large, calloused hand that belonged to her father- it now lay on her head, patting a few times before his thumb stroked the top of her head, then swept across her forehead, moving her fringe aside for a moment to clearly display her surprised face. The weight had completely dissipated, and Sayo would admit that she was slightly in awe, and curious as to if this was part of whatever update had taken place, and if her parents had a new manual for her to read so that she could better understand and control all these odd mishaps with her body as of late. They hadn’t really made those in recent developments, only verbally instructing and vaguely explaining to Sayo functions she could and could not perform.

Her musings were cut short by the words she was still getting used to.

“We love you and…” The man she labelled as her father started, “We’re sorry we’re late”. She felt her brows furrow, a wrinkle forming between her eyes.

“What do you-“ Before Sayo could even ask what those words had meant, Hina’s familiar singsong voice had interrupted the exchange.

“Huh? Why are you guys still here?” Seeing as she was now here, Sayo inferred that the Kitchen and dining room had been cleaned up, and that they had lingered by the doorway for far longer than she thought.

The ribboned girl looked between her parents and sister, confused at the atmosphere shrouding them.

“S-sorry, sweetheart. Just had a lot of things to remind your sister.” Mr. Hikawa smiled, moving forward to wrap his younger daughter in a hug. “You know, reminding her to take care of you, and not overwork herself.”

“Oh yeah, Onee-chan does that a lot.” Hina agreed, seemingly buying it. “I do try to tell her to have fun and stuff, but she never listens!”

“You never listen to the voice of common sense, either.” Sayo quipped. “And your idea of fun is fairly life-threatening.” She whispered the last part to herself.

“Anyway! We also had to talk the usual budget for you guys, and just… stuff.” Their father finished the little white lie fabulously.

“Right!” Hina nodded, believing every word… probably.

With a cough from their mother, Hina escaped her father’s hold and gave the eldest woman a gentle, but enthusiastic embrace.

Once over and done with Hina’s affectionate goodbye’s, the Hikawa couple bid their daughters a farewell, leaving hand in hand until their figures escaped Sayo’s line of sight.

Breaking out into a sigh, Sayo locked the door behind her as the twins headed for their respective rooms to retire for the night.

Sayo felt dissatisfaction stir within her. She had so many questions she wanted answered when she found that it was time for her parents’ regular visit, but now that they had left, she had even more than what she started with instead of less as she had planned.

Mumbling her goodnight to her sister, she closed the door to her room with a silent click.

Unlike her usual graceful manner of carefully sitting or laying down on her bed, Sayo had unceremoniously plopped face-first into the soft mattress, once more unknowing of the reasons as to why she performed this action.

Something was off with her lately. Even more-so after these last few updates. She seemed to be dancing to subconscious promptings, acting with less thought and calculation than she usually would- should, according to everything that was initially written in her learning manual.

She had thought her parents would spot these errors without her having to mention it, but somehow it seems things had only gotten worse.

The way the two were acting towards her lately only further supplemented her confusion. All these ‘we love you’s were not something she was used to, at all. She had only begun to get comfortable with Hina’s overbearing affection the past few months, and now her parents were being… odd.

Burrowing her face into a pillow, Sayo found herself thinking back to her past as a child. She had always known that there was a difference between her and Hina. There was a difference between how her parents addressed her, and how they fawned over her younger sister.

She recalled the stiff interactions, the formal instructions, the commands, the rare, but still awkward praises when she accomplished tasks she was supposed to better than expected, and the… times she would look on from afar as her sister received what she later on learned to be “hugs” from their parents.

Something she never had the pleasure of receiving as a small child. At least from them. Hina- bless her soul, Sayo would now say- was the only one willing to ‘teach’ her these things. Other kids at school never bothered to interact with her either. She was too expressionless, too scary, too serious, too-

Too Unhuman.

She would’ve laughed had it not been such a hurtfully accurate notion.

In comparison to her experiences, through clear lens, Sayo observed that Hina and their parents communicated with warmth; how the girl was guided with affection and encouragement, and lifted up due to her sheer genius.

In all honesty, Sayo had to admit she envied Hina then, that genius she had. She sometimes pondered the thought of being programmed to perfection, without flaw, weakness, or struggle. Would that have made her a genius too, at least in the eyes of normal men? Would that have earned her praise even if it wouldn’t matter to a freedom-less girl like her? -Was she even a girl at this point?

She might not be.

Still, she envied it quite a bit. Yes, the fact that Hina was a genius was what she was jealous of, nothing more.

She had read on it in an article once; how children could often feel jealous if attention and care were not distributed fairly by parents, leading to feelings of neglect and lack of relational connections. Had Sayo been a normal girl, maybe this would’ve been so; however, she believed that it would not apply to someone like her… someone like her… something like her…?

After all, there… was no reason for her to desire anything like love, adoration, or care, was there? Being able to perform as she was designed to, being able to do what she had to- those were what mattered in this “familial” relationship between her and her parents.

Right?

…

Rolling onto her belly, she stared up at her ceiling, body not up to the usual task of devoted guitar playing for tonight, it seemed.

She sighed.

Blinking once, twice, she noticed and remembered that up on her ceiling were glow-in-the-dark stars that Hina had insisted to put up in Sayo’s room, along with a lone crescent moon that paired with Hina’s sun in her own quarters. For some reason, she couldn’t help but compare that to their own social situations at the moment.

If people were stars, Hina belonged with the stars as the sun was still a star. It might be more prominent and more known to most inhabitants of the earth, just as Hina was someone popular to many, even to strangers; but still, she was one of them. Even if she had to shine alone in the morning sky, people still knew she was- and still grouped her as- one of the stars. She was most definitely a star too.

Sayo, however, could not relate. Hina had told her she was the moon, and even if it tries to shine alongside the stars, it will not- and never be- a star. And in the moon’s moments, where the city lights drown out all the stars, even the moon’s shine is dulled and it is truly alone; and though it is seen on the same stage, in the same night sky, no matter how much it would try to blend in with the crowd… it would never be a star.

Sayo would never be a star.

Another sigh. A toss. A turn.

Again, her line of thinking drifted to the changes she and her family seemed to be going through. Somehow, she found life somewhat easier back when everything had been so professional. It may have seemed like she was neglected and alone, but such negativities could be adapted to, could be grown out of. Sayo could simply get used to it, suck it up like the mature person she was, and move on. Or at least that’s how it was to the outside onlooker. To Sayo, it was just normal for there to be distance. She wasn’t really a part of their family.

She wouldn’t be able to understand it anyway.

So why did everything have to take a turn?

Actually… When did everything suddenly take a turn?

Was it when she had first met Yukina? Was it as Roselia progressed into a proper band? Or was it when they became friends, bound by music, never to be broken apart?

Was it when Lisa stepped up to help her with Hina after Sayo had gone too far with her distancing? The gentle hand on her back, drawing circles as the brunette listened intently to her confusion and woes, and taught her a little bit more about what relationships were? Was it that?

Sayo had no clue.

One day, everything just seemed to morph; her reality was changing. The improvement of her relationship with Hina may have marked the most significant wave of change. Sayo found herself able to decipher her constant home companion bit by bit. She could guess what the girl was up to, she could figure out her moods, and keep up with her whims (she hoped).

Then suddenly, her parents showed up more often than the usual check-ups. They listened intently during Sayo’s parent-teacher conferences, they no longer constantly reminded her of their expectations for her, they would actually send her messages outside the usual appointment updates, or information briefing, or requests. They would tell her how they saw a guitar model that Sayo might like; texted her that if she wanted anything for Christmas, she could tell them.

She would catch her mother’s stare many times, before the woman offered her a nervous, or kind smile. Her father would constantly ask her about her preferences for updates.

And what unnerved her most of all, was the fact that they had been offering her physical affection (sure they were limited to pats, touches, or handholds, but it was odd enough) and constant “we love you”s. Something they used to only do in public setting to show that the family was on good terms with one another.

-not saying that they weren’t, because Sayo deemed that her being alive was enough proof that they were on good terms.

…such a scary thought, she now realizes.

Anyhow, it just so happened that even in private, her parents were now actively performing those aforementioned acts towards Sayo. Were they trying to build rapport with her? Trying to get on her good side? She had no complaints about their relationship in the past, so why did they have to try to change it up now?

And of course, the thing that bothered her the most… feelings.

Suddenly, the “feelings” prompts in her mind were no longer just emptily flashed words of alert with instructions on how she should act. They now did all these odd reactions to her body, made her lose her control, put errors in her usual calculations.

She didn’t know whether she liked it or not.

There was something within her whispering that this was what she wanted. Because it made her real, or at least pretend to be…

But her practical mind told her it would only serve to continue to burden her. This, she truly believed.

If that were so, why couldn’t she have it removed? Whatever program in her that involved these dreaded feelings? Her parents had told her she could always express her desires when it came to her recent upgrading. She was told she could ask for anything. So why wouldn’t she ask for one simple removal? One that would solve all her current distress, and quite possibly benefit her by giving her the efficient life she wanted?

She didn’t know.

She didn’t know why she was trying to cling to fragments of a false reality, a world where she wasn’t what she was. A lie in which… she was a real girl.

She just didn’t know.

And to these thoughts, her world shut down.

-//-//-//-//-//-//-

It was the weekend; what most students considered their free time- time to waste, time to slack off. They simply had so much time, away from the usual school day. And simply having this much time was all the more reason for Roselia to spend it on practice instead.

Sayo arrived early. She always did. It was part of her internalized time-table. She had one for almost all occasions. For school, for weekends with student council work, and without. Today, her schedule consisted of waking up, preparing breakfast, washing up and getting dressed. Then she would eat, get on the seven-forty-five train, arrive at circle and ask for the reserved room, grab a sweetened coffee by the vending machine, down it in ten, and enter the practice area to tune her guitar and do warm-ups until everyone else arrived. Everything she did was performed on the dot, down to the very last second.

There were days where tiny deviations from her predicted happenings occurred, but nothing that would throw her off completely. They sometimes came in the form of any other member arriving earlier than her. In the case of Minato Yukina, she guessed it wouldn’t be all that odd. At the beginning, they would simply regard one another with a small nod before continuing onto their individual warm-ups. As Roselia’s relationship improved however, they often exchanged small talk, or opinions on the band and each other’s personal progress, seeking advice. If it were Ako who got there before Sayo, she would only pray that nothing was out of place, and that there were no soda spills on the carpets. She’d rather not have a repeat of one certain incident.

Rinko and Lisa were rarely the first people in the studio. Sayo dealt with is as it came. They would offer greetings and pleasantries, and focus on warm-ups, and that was it.

Or well, that was then.

It came little by little, but things were certainly different now. There were days when Sayo would come in just a few seconds before an Ako barreled right into her, apologizing, but not letting go without a quick hug around Sayo’s waist, and irresistible puppy eyes that almost always asked Sayo to pat her head before the younger girl would break out into a grin, satisfied, and ready to warm up. She really did remind Sayo of all the videos of dogs she’d watch out of some form of habit, possibly; filling up a personal database file all on their own.

Rinko, she-…

Well, she wasn’t as scared of Sayo anymore. That could be noted as some sort of improvement. It wasn’t as if they never got along before, but work in the student council felt just a tad bit more relaxing, and quite enjoyable lately, if Sayo were to be honest. Rinko was like a breath of fresh air amongst everyone else’s eccentricities- including those other band girls outside their own.

Then… there was a pair that had suddenly been throwing her for a loop.

Minato Yukina and Imai Lisa. One so cold and aloof, avoided like a harsh winter day; and the other heated and sociable, passionate in dance and music like the summer… At least, that was how Sayo saw them at the beginning.

It came as sudden as all the other surprises in Sayo’s present life. Sayo spotted a silver songstress on her knees in a hidden corner of the park, leaning down towards a tiny kitten in what she saw was a shared eskimo kiss. She felt a stall between the beats of her heart. And it became a memory she’d never forget, sometimes replaying itself in her moments of slumber. Sayo realized that Yukina wasn’t just the snow, she was also the spring that came in turn right after.

The bassist, on the other hand, proved to also be the fall. A beauty to behold, making you forget the coldness it actually had. Lisa had days where she would doubt herself; days where her silence would issue warning sirens in Sayo’s poor confused system, prompting her to offer gauche comfort- the only kind she could manage in her uncertainty.

It didn’t help that the girl wore the scent of cinnamon and pumpkin spice pie, and all the sweet little guilty pleasures hardwired into Sayo’s poor mind (It was a weakness she would never admit to- she wondered if her parents added such a detail in the blueprint for personal amusement); and the fact that she’d casually offer an embrace that caused those fragrances to overwhelm the stiff guitarist was an additional trigger, along with a Yukina who smelled of vanilla and cookies- though the latter was probably just due to the crumbs from Lisa’s treats that the unexpectedly clumsy leader of Roselia got all over herself.

She often tried to ignore the way Lisa would cling to her and Yukina’s arms as they walked to or from the studio, or to a gig; she would try to ignore the warmth that suddenly spread from the point of contact between them to her entire body. She would also ignore the jitters and “flutters” she would feel when her eyes would meet Yukina’s mid-song, and the tiniest of smiles would play on the singer’s lips and- was that a wink, Minato Yukina?!

It irked Sayo that almost everything she had gotten used to and inputted into her data bank of memories over the course of her seventeen- eighteen years of existence were slowly changing; herself and Hina, their parents, and now, even Roselia and the rest of their girls’ band peers. Heck- even the students at school had begun to greet Sayo as she monitored the halls (which was already quite the feat, as they usually screeched or shuffled their merry way out of hers), even when she wore her usual- as Lisa and Hina so fondly called- “resting bitch face”; stoic and devoid of emotion.

How could everything just be so confusing-

“..yo? Sayo! Sayo?”

Ah. This voice sounded plenty confused as well.

“Sayo, is something the matter?”

A hand on her shoulder, and another in a worried clasp around her bicep, pulling her to spin around, face-to-face with furrowed green eyes almost matching her own.

Had she been lost in thought?

“Imai…san.” Sayo regarded with a slow nod, each syllable carefully spoken.

A hand shot out to touch her forehead, accompanied by the concerned question of, “Are you sick?”.

Well, good morning to you as well, Imai-san.

Despite the lack of proper greetings from everyone, the guitarist decided to simply answer the question before things went for worse. Sayo shook her head no, the action allowing her eyes to notice that the room was complete with all of Roselia’s members staring at her, perplexed at the bizarre, unusual Sayo they had just stumbled upon, guitar slung over her shoulders, but staring at a blank wall for who-knows-how-long before the rest arrived.

“Are you sure?” Lisa pressed, though that wasn’t the only thing she was pressing apparently, as one of Sayo’s hands was clasped between both of Lisa’s and was currently held against her fairly mature che-

“Sayo, I believe we’ve had a talk about this before, but if you are sick, one must not overexert themselves as this would trouble our band in the long run.”

“Yes, thank you, Minato-san.” –‘for taking my mind away from somewhere I’d rather it not be in.’. Sayo completed the sentence silently, hoping no one suddenly developed the powers of mindreading. “But still, I am fine and most certainly healthy.”

“You are most welcome.” Yukina gave in reply. “But I also don’t believe you all that much, Sayo. Not with your history of overwork.” Stepping in closer, the shorter girl took Sayo’s other hand in her own, giving it a squeeze. “So do tell us if you need a break today, and you shall have it.”

Oh, it had started again. Those thumps and irregular skips in Sayo’s pulse, the desire to run to the comfort room with her coolant for just a bit, the shaky breaths.

“I- I truly appreciate your kindness, but I am certainly fine and I would love to never burden you with something like a missing member due to negligence with my health.” Sayo once more tried to convince them of the truth. It was difficult.

“Really?” Gold and green interrogated, moving the slightest bit too close into Sayo’s personal space and mental safety barrier. Did they really not trust her to regulate and discipline herself with her health, much more after her first blunder?

The answer seemed to be yes.

Even Rinko’s tiny whispers of, “Hikawa-san” relayed her sincere worry for Sayo’s well-being, along with Ako’s less-than-subtle fidgeting. And while she was grateful for their sincerity, it felt a bit overbearing.

Sayo sighed for… some numbered time now. She’d done that a lot lately.

“Really.”

That seemed to have worked as everyone visibly relaxed, Ako and Rinko continuing on with their set-up and warm-ups. Sayo would have hoped that this would influence the other two in front of her to do the same; and they did. They did get to that…

But not without a gentle squeeze on her hands, a pat from Yukina, and a blown kiss from Lisa that only made it feel much hotter.

And why this was?

She still could not fathom.

And she hated that fact.

-//-//-//-

She would definitely have to apologize later.

Practice had gone nowhere. Sayo’s perfect, calculated playing, everything done with precision and a charm solely hers… it just wasn’t there. And all because of her damned updated mind that kept bringing up two pairs of warm hands, and faces that seemed to be glowing in her eyes. Then there was the matter of Lisa’s… upper… half…

“We stop here for today.” Yukina’s usual stoic voice commanded, though Sayo could hear the frustration oozing out. She clearly was not pleased, and that was all because of Sayo’s lackluster performance.

Everyone nodded in reluctant agreement, each moving to fix up their instruments, securing them in their cases.

As they were ready to leave, lights turned off and door open in wait for the guitarist to be the last member to step out, Sayo spoke, stopping under the shadow of the darkened room in a bow. “I apologize. I’ll do better next time. Today’s subpar performance was clearly due to my lack of concentration and I shall do my utmost in correcting my-“

“Sayo.”

Said girl looked up from her perfectly ninety-degree bow.

“It’s okay.”

Scanning each of her bandmates’ faces, their expressions all responded with the same thing.

It’s okay.

“Really, Sayo-san, you should tell us if you feel a little sick! You work so hard, taking a break shouldn’t be a problem for you!” Ako laughed, but it had this little nervous color to it that expressed her care for Sayo.

“Ako…chan… is right. Hikawa-san… you already… play so well. You’d never…fall behind even if… you missed one session.” Rinko gave one of her most comforting smiles, and Sayo felt the desire to smile back. And she did.

“Even if I held you all back?” Sayo asked.

“What nonsense. A member of Roselia would do no such thing!” Yukina stated with conviction. “And in the impossible case that you did,” She grabbed Sayo, pulling her out of the dark room, and into the light, in the bright hallway with everyone else. “-then we’d pull you right along. We’d do that for each other, for any comrade.”

“She’s right. We’d do it in a heartbeat.” Lisa latched on to her arm, resting her head slightly on Sayo’s shoulder, almost nuzzling the spot, which would have been bad for Sayo’s processors. “I’m sure we all feel that way.” The brunette added good-naturedly. But those words held a not-too-pleasant weight for Sayo.

‘We all feel that way.’

All.

Feel.

“Right. Of course.” Sayo nodded, covering up the sudden shakiness in her legs by taking a firm step forward, still attached to the two same-year best friends.

Like wild horses being held back that suddenly broke their fence, her thoughts ran. Roselia trusted her. As a teammate, a bandmate, a comrade… a friend. So how was she to tell them she wasn’t like all of them. That she didn’t know how to feel? How was she to explain that their warm, heartfelt sentiments were things she could not return genuinely?

How could she explain that the so-called emotions she portrayed were automatic, programmed responses? How could she possibly tell them that even she did not know her own sincerity towards the band, how she no longer knew if what she was doing was out of necessity and a must for self-preservation- a “professional” type of relationship; or if it was because she harbored what they had in their own souls. A love for other people.

No. It couldn’t be that.

She knew what it was. But that was textbook knowledge. She could never apply that to her own understanding and utilization.

She wasn’t meant to be able to do that. It wasn’t in her manual. Feelings never were. No matter how many years had passed. She’d never get to understand it.

Humans smile because they are happy. They cry when they are sad, they get angry because of unpleasant things. These little facts were what she was introduced to as the basis for telling emotions.

But then Hina smiled even though Sayo hurt her; Lisa cried when they got her flowers she loved for her birthday, and celebrated with her. Yukina got angry when another presumptuous producer offered to take them to a world stage.

It didn’t make any sense. Their reactions brought about by feelings were nothing like the manual. They were nothing so simple. They were so complex.

Too complex for a non-genius… nonhuman, non-girl like Sayo to understand.

But how could she say that to people who trusted her? That she wanted to offer a genuine trust in return to, but couldn’t possibly do so.

Again, she was far too deep inside the caves of her mind, peripheral sensors crippled to the world causing her to misstep, lunging forward for a faceplant-

…that never came.

Two bright smiles, warm eyes, and soulful emotions.

They teased and taunted, made Sayo heat up, heart threatening to explode at the sheer speed it pumped, but the notions also enough reason for her blood to run cold with unjustified envy- one that should not be able to exist within the teal-haired girl either. Because why should they be able to feel the way they do and bask in the enlightenment feelings brought. Why couldn’t Sayo? But then again, why did she care when it shouldn’t have mattered to her in the first place?

Confusing. Vexing. Frustrating.

And as Yukina held one of her hands, and Lisa clung to the other just as they did hours earlier, Sayo only felt more disdain for the concept she labelled as “feelings”. They made her bitter deep down, not because of their good intent, but that she knew not what these meant. They just weren’t for her. Feelings would never be hers to attain, they would never let Sayo own them; understanding of them constantly slipping from her grasp.

So she ended up hating them. Hating having feelings. Hating feelings.

Feelings that could never be felt by Sayo’s cold Mechanical heart.

A/N: And that’s a… wrap?? I honestly… was stuck. I guess I’d rather treat this as chap 1 and the other as the prologue haha. My brain is so dried out tbh. Um… reactions? Comments?

~Shintori Khazumi

#hikawa sayo #sayo hikawa #hikawa hina #hikawa twins #yukisayolisa #sayolisa #yukisayo #minato yukina #imai lisa #fanfic #ARG #bandori #bang dream #mechanical? au

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irkenheretic · 4 years

Note

Does Red have that one genetic disorder? What does it do to Irkens who do have it?

OOOHHH OKAY SO this is all gonna be headcanon stuff for ANX (watch me forget to tag the post as such lmao) so itll be canon divergent at points

so The Red Eye Thing, which has no formal name because why would irkens name it, is a linked gene between the gene that causes red eyes, and a genetic disorder that leaves an irken with a little extra chunk of chromosome in a sex cell that made them. (a sex cell is like, either the sperm or the egg, one of those) not an entire extra chromosome, that doesn’t happen among irkens, but a chunk.

you can’t have red eyes without having The Red Eye Thing, so yes red does have it! ^^

i just have to go on record and say that in ANX, irkens still reproduce naturally. they dont mate for fun or keep the young, but its still not artificial. smeets are also VERY IMPORTANT in irken society as they are seen as the future of the empire (like, assaulting a smeet is so universally hated that if someone is jailed for it they will 100% be killed before they ever stand trial. smeet assaulters are so hated that the control brains know this happens and they just let it happen)

so given how societally important smeets are, it tends to be Very Bad for Red Eyes that the main problem their genetic disorder gives them is infertility. theyre basically looked down upon societally because they’re unable to do a basic biological function that even smallers and defectives can do.

i mentioned they also have hyperpigmented skin in my other ask, but im putting it here again anyway. skin colors from that hyperpigmentation can range from “dark, but still normal irken dark” to “i have never seen a skin color as dark as yours before holy fuck” these edits i did of red are what he looks like in ANX, and hes on the way far end of the spectrum- out of 100+ characters in ANX, some other Red Eyes, he’s the darkest one. the hyperpigmentation is a result of the extra chunk of chromosome lmao

also, Red Eyes have trouble detecting pheromones other irkens give off. this can be just dulled senses, or it can be a total lack of detection, like what Red has. (ur seeing a pattern arent u, red has a more “severe” case of his genetic disorder.)

the gene also causes developmental disorders which... aren’t exactly on a sliding scale per se? it’s kind of like autism where every Red Eye acts differently from each other that there’s no real “universal experience” for how this specific thing presents itself.

the red eye gene is passed on from parent to child, it won’t mutate and it can’t be carried- you either have it or you don’t.

“but how can that be if they’re infertile!” i said infertile, not sterile. the reason Red Eyes are infertile is because, since the extra chromosome chunk was in a sex cell, at least 50% of their sex cells will be affected with the extra chunk, too. irkens have a biomechanism that purges cells with missing or extra chromosome parts (extra-chromosome irkens are relatively fine, missing-chromosome irkens are like, hatched with no brain or are stillhatches so good that thats... there)

but since those cells are purged, that’s at least half of the fertile cells. of course if they have a more severe case, like red, it would be more than half. so it is moderatley hard to nigh impossible for Red Eyes to conceive or fertilize, depending on who it is. so since only Red Eyes can pass down The Red Eye Gene, and these bitches rarely have smeets, there’s only like.... one Red Eye per generation, maybe two.

(fun facts: there used to be more Red Eye family lines, but some idiot got it in his head that Red Eyes caused defectiveness and that most defect trials were a false positive so in order to save everyone he needed to kill all Red Eyes, so now there.... aren’t..... any more......) (yes the control brains crazy murdered that idiot. they hate him so much sometimes they go “hey remember the red eye genocide guy? what the fuck, right?”)

so tl;dnr: it’s a genetic disorder caused by an extra chunk of chromosome in either a sperm or egg that made the irken. it causes infertility, hyperpigmentation, low or no ability to detect irken pheromones, and a developmental disorder that presents differently in everyone that has it.

tl;dnr 2: irken down’s syndrome.

under the cut im gonna go on about how society sees irkens with this condition (under the cut because.... sexual assault tw. also ableism tw)

Red Eyes are seen as... well... broken pieces of shit. before red was tallest, there WAS another Red Eye Tallest in recent history- tallest Zim. (NO RELATION to invader zim haha) zim becoming tallest made Red Eyes not be.... as hated, but there’s still this societal idea of “you are a broken piece of shit and your cells should have been purged.... buuuut if you do something above and beyond whatever it is your job is, we Might think you’re cool. also we probably won’t say this to your face but we’re thinking it really hard at you, and you KNOW we’re thinking it, so there’s no point in not saying it, but we still won’t so you cant claim we hate you. but make no mistake, we do.” so red just had, the BEST time growing up.

remember in my last ask, i said Red Eyes are liked a little too well sometimes? well... due to their infertility, they’re frequent targets for rape, especially in the military, since military irkens aren’t allowed to mate. nab a Red Eye and you can have all the fuck you want without any, er, evidence. red honestly was lucky he was constantly stickied to purple as an elite, otherwise Horrible Things could’ve happened.

was the general populace worried about a Red Eye tallest? yes. yes they were, back when it was tallest zim. they thought he’d be shit at it due to how “broken” he was. there was a LOT of public outcry, especially since zim was on the shorter side of tallests. they were ready to be all “see, Red Eyes are NOTHING,” until zim was actually an amazing tallest. he was so good the control brains liked him, and the only other modern tallest they actually liked was miyuki. he did great things for the empire, everyone loved him. when tallest red became tallest, everyone was much less worried. but they were still thinkin it, ya dig.

is red related to tallest zim? yes, zim is red’s grandfather.

is red’s tendency to forget words a part of his developmental disorder? it could be, could not be. there’s not much of a sample size due to yknow, the genocide, so there’s no-one to compare his symptoms against. the disorder presents differently in everyone so even if red is the only living Red Eye with that symptom, doesnt mean its NOT a symptom ya dig? but im gonna word of god it and say yes it is

can you have the same chromosome thing without being a Red Eye? yes! in this ask i talk about spork having a learning disability- he has the same chromosome thing, it just gives him different symptoms because he doesnt have the specific instance that red eyes have.

can you have red eyes without the chromosome thing? no, the gene for red-colored eyes is stickied to the Extra Chunk gene, and unlike chromosome issues, which can happen to any irken, an irken will not randomly mutate a gene for red-colored eyes.

is the term “red eye” derogatory? it was EXTREMELY derogatory before tallest zim took power. now it’s just a general term for a red eyed irken, but... irkens will still use it in an insulting way. like... “queer” is the best parallel i can draw. used to be a slur, now is a general term, but some people still clearly use it as a slur against others.

are red eyes called slurs? YES. they are targets for The Word. The Worst Word In The Irken Language, So Bad You Can’t Even Call It “The __ Word” Because It’s Too Close To Saying The Word. It Is Just, “The Word.” it used to be WAY worse before the genocide, simply because there were more of them. it decreased even more after tallest zim took power, but make no mistake, it’s still out there. also The Word translates out to “condemned obsolete bastard” with a side order of “the beginning of The Word sounds like im spitting on you and thats also exactly what it means.” its an awful slur its like if every human slur had an orgy

(was red called slurs growing up- YES.)

are Red Eyes defective? they can be! defectiveness is in the PAK, not in an irken’s biology. that’s why they’re called genetic disorders and not genetic defects, to separate them from the “we are going to execute you” defectiveness. they’re still scorned as if they are defective, though. sometimes theyre called “worse than defectives” as a jab at their infertility- like, even the empire’s worst can do that, ya dig?

back in The Old Days, there was probably a mix of defective and non-defective Red Eyes. now they’re all defective by coincidence.

#anarchisma au #I REMEMBERED FUCK YEAH #rape m #ableism tw #live from conventia #i hope u like it!!

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reenactedsky · 4 years

Text

Hindsight is 2020; Translations, A Year In Review

Total Year’s Output: 290,131 (published as of 14 Jan 2021)

If I include unpublished, upwards of 375k def.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January 2020?

Haha. Translating Chinese, me. Who would have thought. That aside, probably Zheng Xuan/Chu Yunxiu, along w that it is very short compared to most other romance-centred fics that I read, and falling as hard for that ship as I had.

Zheng Xuan consciously walked to stand beside Chu Yunxiu and looked especially obedient as he took out a small box from the pocket of his coat, scaring Chu Yunxiu half to death. “Don’t worry, it’s not a ring… Didn’t you say last time that your coat button broke and wanted to find a similar one? Here, for you.” (...)

Of the ten thousand tv dramas that Chu Yunxiu had watched, not a single one of them taught her how to reject the button of her favourite coat.

What’s your favourite story of the year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you happiest.

Flowers Dedicated to the Cold of Winter -

Hands down. It meanders through the different time periods of Samsara, non-linear narrative format, heavily slice of life. Yet through which it manages to delve into seldom-explored topics peppered with sublime characterisation - such as Zhou Zekai setting his phone ringtone as the sound effect for Shattered Frost in autumn and winter, Wildfire in spring and summer; the woe's of Samsara's financial director to make Samsara a profitable business across the seasons; Sun Xiang sneaking off to watch Excellent Era in s10 challenger's league and the resultant exposition on Qiu Fei's legacy; the spirit of the Four Heavenly Kings in Tyranny and their looming retirement, most notably Han Wenqing, through the eyes of Zhang Xinjie. I could go on and on, I love this fic so much, and forever will.

Jiang Botao knew that Sun Xiang was watching all of this on the stage silently from some corner or other. Watching Qiu Fei, the successor to ‘One Autumn Leaf’ that had been groomed and abandoned; Qiu Fei, willing to stand behind Sun Xiang as a shadow; Qiu Fei, insisting on staying on to fight the challenger’s league with Excellent Era, desperately putting in his all to push Excellent Era ashore.

The relationship between the team and the club was intriguing. There were times when the club required the team’s loyalty. There were times when loyalty had no saving grace.

Most popular story of the year?

Return - I can see why, yeah. Main char halo is strong in this fandom, alongside that this fic is pretty fun w powerful feel-goods near the end. I was really excited to get to translate this, too. The reporter that goes on a mission to find Ye Xiu in the VR server seriously gives off such Blue River vibes.

East Window really wanted to burst into tears. “I was only an innocent passer-by who was on the way to collect a quest item…”

One Harvest Year concluded, “All in all, in the eyes of the big guild, we’re both complicit, thick as thieves, blacklisted insurgents, and will be the key targets of their ire in the coming days. Congratulations, hero.”

Most fun story to translate?

Written in the Stars - finished translating this in a single evening, albeit shorter than most others that I take on. The premise is simple, a preternatural connection between Ye Xiu and Ye Qiu, but it flows so beautifully between the scenes, most notably that it doesn’t have a lot of discrete dialogue tags. It's also the only fic tl that I've managed to reread for leisure and enjoy as it is without going into hardcore editing glasses mode.

Again a few years later, there was suddenly an afternoon when Ye Qiu leaned by his side and asked, hey. Have you ever cried for no good reason before? Ye Xiu instantly grew spirited, reasonably and righteously interrogating Ye Qiu, did you really curse your own brother?

Then, Ye Xiu thought of something – ever since he returned home, he’d never cried again.

Hardest story to translate?

Awkward Conversations - really threw myself in the deep end for this one :pikalul: cultural nods and puns and slang abound. It's def not my proudest work, but one I'm proud for trying nevertheless due to it being more unlikely to appear in the wild in efandom. It is rather quintessential Chinese slice of life. National team shenanigans.

Being a support class and once again target to a barrage of attacks, Li Xuan flings his mouse. “This game can’t be played.”

Huang Shaotian consoles him: “It’s okay, Crying Devil has never cried.”

Li Xuan: “Troubling Rain is truly troubling.”

Afterwards, when Zhang Xinjie is requested by fans to tell a joke, he says, “I move the Immovable Rock.”

A story I’m proud to have translated?

In the Realm of the Living, My Head Covered with Snow - naturally. It spans my entire translating career (of only one year kek), but it grew alongside me, and on its own right is already a marvellous work. I can only do my best by it. Zhouye. Beautiful relationship development, but is also a work that talks about more than just love. Feels so surreal that I only have five chapters left :bongocat:

A story I really wish I could translate?

秘密 by kukulia - author's lofter account has been deleted. The quietest love I've read in a long, long time, if ever. Zhouye. 100 postcards, 10 years; Zhou Zekai has been sending fan-mail to Ye Xiu from the very first season, and when Ye Xiu retires, they eventually become penpals.

Favourite cursed translation mistakes?

‘Han Wenjing’, ‘Grass Herb’.

Do you have any fanfic goals for the New Year?

Finish translating taint & torrent.

#tka #for own ref

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tiramisiyu · 4 years

Text

【未定事件簿】 Tears of Themis: 【夏彦拜访剧情】 Xia Yan’s Personal Story 2-5 Translation

Translated parts: Xia Yan’s Personal Story Chapter 2: 2-1 / 2-2 / 2-4 / 2-5 / 2-7 / 2-8 / 2-9 / 2-10 / 2-11 / 2-13 / 2-14 Translation Masterlist: here

Video: https://www.bilibili.com/video/BV1xV411m79T?p=4

A quick explanation of how this feature works is that each boy has their own section that you can “Visit”! Part of it is like MLQC’s GSH feature, where you can talk to the boys (with Live2D!) and raise intimacy by interacting with them. The other part of it is a storyline that centers on the MC running around with the respective boy to deal with a certain case or situation.

Escape Room Place

The moment Xia Yan and I walked to the front counter, the owner gave a thumbs-up towards us.

Owner: Amazing! You two were so quick in deciding to come out and get clues! The guests from before all stayed in there for over an hour!

MC: So we really were supposed to come out the riddle room to look for clues…

Xia Yan: Looking from the contents of the commission letter, answering the riddle doesn’t necessarily need to be confined in the riddle room.

Xia Yan: But are there any special implications to doing this?

Owner: Haha, this – you’ll know after playing! Hurry off!

The owner feigned a mysterious laugh, hastening Xia Yan and me to act quick.

Ball Pit Park

The amusement park was right beside the escape room place – they were very close together.

Xia Yan and I arrived very quickly to the amusement park. After walking for a bit in the park, we arrived at the “Jade Sea, White Sands” ball pit themed area.

Xia Yan: Hey, we’re here.

As one of the themed carnival projects of the amusement park, a ton of attention had been paid to the layout of this place.

Just the area that had been encircled by a white fence was nearly 1000 square meters. Inside, they had even subdivided “coast” and “sea” areas.

The “coast” on the two sides of the entrance was dotted with deck chairs and beach umbrellas on the ground. One could leisurely read books and drink beverages there.

Behind the “coast”, innumerable alternating white-and-blue balls showed a vast “sea”. Among those, there were even various entertainment installations.

Xia Yan: Really spectacular – how many balls must there be here?

MC: The posters said that there are a full two million!

MC: Ah! Xia Yan, look quick! There’s someone jumping in!

MC: He’s so much taller than me, yet his legs are fully buried. Do you think that if it were me, could I be completely covered in there?

Xia Yan: Sure enough, you still really like ball pits.

Xia Yan: Just like just now – with just the corner in the picture, you immediately recognized that it was here.

Xia Yan: Now that we talk about this, every time we came to the amusement park when we were little, you would always impatiently run here.

Xia Yan: Hey! Look! There’s a slide over there, want to play on it?

MC: How, how could that be alright! That’s for little kids to play with – I’m an adult now!

As we spoke, “whoosh-” a little kid slid down quickly down the slide.

“Boom” – he splashed into a large area filled with the balls, laughing cheerfully.

MC: (Although… sliding down the slide into the balls must feel super great…)

Xia Yan: Aren’t there adults there too?

MC: They’re all there to look after the kids. Where are there adults themselves playing!

Xia Yan: Then it should be fine if us two adults “walk around”, right?

Xia Yan: After all, the clue to solve the riddle is in here.

MC: Then… then let’s go inside and walk around, looking for clues.

I followed Xia Yan, walking into that vast, white-and-blue ball pit sea.

We only noticed when we stepped in that the balls here were spread thicker than I had thought. There were some places that could even pile past my waist.

As we walked, swathes of balls swept away from my feet in a rush, colliding to make bouncing sounds that would make anyone happy.

There were a few times when I almost slipped. I had an impulse – to jump into this “sea” and happily roll around.

MC: (Resist it…you are an adult… don’t be so childish…)

MC: (You need to know how to overcome your primitive desires…)

Xia Yan: …

To avoid the internal war going on in my heart, I forced myself to concentrate all my drive together to look for the location that had appeared in the photo.

Finally, after making half a round in the ball pit, I noticed something.

MC: Xia Yan, look at the inflatable slide over there!

I pointed out a three-person-tall inflatable slide that wasn’t far away for Xia Yan to see.

Painted on the side of the slide were a few cartoon pictures, models, colours, lines – all identical to the background in the picture from the escape room.

Xia Yan: Yeah, should be that one!

Xia Yan and I quickly walked over to the side of the slide. We only saw that there was Velcro stuck on the cartoon pictures on the side.

It seemed like there was something written on the Velcro, but its position was so high – even Xia Yan wouldn’t be able to reach it.

MC: The thing in the Velcro is most likely to be the clue, right? But how do we get it…

Xia Yan: I have an idea! Wait a bit!

As Xia Yan said this, he ran off. Soon, he pushed an inflatable trampoline back.

MC: A trampoline? Could you mean…?

Xia Yan: That’s right! Let’s try bouncing on it – maybe we can rip off the Velcro!

Xia Yan: Though you said that adults couldn’t play, this has to do with Sphinx, so you can reluctantly try it.

MC: Alright then…

I climbed on the inflatable trampoline. The feeling of fully-inflated bounciness under my feet made me feel restless immediately.

I unconsciously squatted, then couldn’t help starting to jump up and down.

MC: (Ah… I forgot to look at the Velcro’s spot!)

I promptly turned my gaze to the Velcro up there and jumped up with force.

MC: It’s not enough, I keep missing it slightly when I jump like this!

Xia Yan: Try jumping with more force. How come I feel like you aren’t jumping any higher than you did when you were little?

MC: How could that be!

As if to prove it to Xia Yan, I bounced with more force a few more times. Finally—

MC: Touched it!

But the Velcro was like it had grown on the side of the slide. I couldn’t rip it off at all with just the strength from this moment of bouncing.

Xia Yan: Don’t give up, try again! You’ll definitely get it next time!

Under Xia Yan’s encouragement, I bounced again, then again, then again…

Five minutes later… I collapsed, lying in the ball pit.

Innumerable balls held me up, making bouncing noises beside me. I felt a sort of yearning feeling for this thing that I hadn’t done in a long while. I didn’t want to move anymore.

MC: I feel like this method isn’t right…

MC: Plus, in addition to being too stamina-taxing, relying on the trampoline to get the Velcro requires height, long arms, hand speed, and strength.

MC: A escape room riddle game shouldn’t have such harsh and chance-reliant solving requirements.

Xia Yan: What you say makes a lot of sense. Hmm, let me think…

Xia Yan: Ah, I got it! The method might be in the picture!

MC: The picture? What other contents are in that picture? Isn’t it just a little girl sitting on Zero’s shoulder – ah?!

I didn’t even finish talking when Xia Yan hoisted me up with his hands.

In a moment of panic, I held on to Xia Yan’s neck.

MC: What are you doing!

Xia Yan: Letting you sit on my shoulder. Don’t grab my neck, hold onto my right shoulder.

As Xia Yan said this, he carried me to sit on his left shoulder, then started walking while holding my legs.

His palms were large and strong, stably supporting my legs.

The heat of his hands directly pressed onto my skin. I unconsciously held tight on his shoulder.

Xia Yan: Don’t worry, you won’t fall off.

MC: …Mm.

Xia Yan: Look at it now, can you rip off the Velcro?

I looked at the location of the Velcro. Sure enough, it was very easy to rip off now.

MC: I ripped it off. There’s a trapezoidal picture in here… wait, it seems like there are numbers on the edge of the picture?

The side of the trapezoid picture seemed to have parts of numerical symbols printed on the edge. I suddenly had a thought.

MC: Xia Yan! This trapezoidal picture should be able to be placed together with the three pictures in the commission letter!

I excitedly gave the picture I’d just gotten to Xia Yan.

Xia Yan: I know! Don’t sway around! I’ll lose my balance!

MC: I, I can’t stay stable anymore!

I unconsciously went to grab the inflatable slide in front of me, wanting to use it to restore balance again.

But the inflatable slide was both soft and elastic. When I grabbed on it, not only did I not stabilize myself, but I instead got knocked askew by the slide.

Xia Yan & MC: Aaaahhhhh—

Bam – Xia Yan and I together fell askew into the ball pit’s “sea”.

MC: Joy turns into sorrow…

I poked my head out of the ball pit, and heard a burst of laughter.

Xia Yan: Hahaha…

Xia Yan: I feel like occasionally revisiting our youth is pretty fun!

Xia Yan looked at me, his coral-coloured eyes full of light and laughter.

Xia Yan… must have deliberately let me play around.

Xia Yan: How about we try some other ones?

Xia Yan: Look over there – we can have a pillow fight in the ball pit!

MC: Hm… let’s not for now.

Xia Yan: What’s wrong, are you tired?

MC: Not really. It’s just that we don’t have much time now, so we should head back first and solve the riddle.

Compared to the ball pit, helping Xia Yan find his treasures is more important.

MC: Your treasure box is still in his hands, after all! We have to get it back quick!

Xia Yan: …

#weiding shijian bu #tot translation #tears of themis #xia yan #未定事件簿 #夏彦拜访剧情 #夏彦

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five-wow · 4 years

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Hi, I'm a fellow writer in the fandom and I admire your work. I wanted to ask, as a popular writer, do you get fixated sometimes on the number of kudos/comments/hits etc that your new work gets, and does this impact your motivation/inspiration? I think comparison is the thief of joy, and I really want to get over this feeling when I post my own work, so was wondering if even popular and regular writers such as yourself feel like this to, and if , what's your secret? Thanks!

Hi! 1) You are so sweet, ahh, and 2) YES, I DO. Gosh, yes, I absolutely do get insecure about those kinds of things, and I think that anyone who says they don't ever feel that way is either lying (to themselves, possibly) or maybe just pure magic, like some cross between a writer and a unicorn.

I love ao3 and I love all of its metrics and I love numbers and statistics, but there’s definitely that shadow side where having all of that easily available makes it deceptively easy to compare your own work to other people’s. I do it all the time! It honestly makes it a little hard for me at times to read h50 fic and fully enjoy it, because I keep... looking at it and wondering how my own stacks up against it, unwillingly. That's not a relaxing experience, and sometimes not even a very fun one. (Another part of it is that I just write SO MUCH for h50 and there is SO MUCH I still want to write, and I don’t want to risk reading something that’s very close to an idea I had and then never being quite sure if what I write after that was influenced by the other person’s work or if it’s really still my idea, because I have this (pretty irrational) fear of accidentally stealing someone else’s work even though one of the really great things about fandom is that it’s a very collaborative process as a whole and being inspired by other people’s stuff is usually totally okay, buuuut that’s a different rambly story.)

And I definitely do also get... some cringey feelings, hardcore, around fics I posted that don't do very well numbers-wise. Sometimes it's expected - fic that doesn't follow traditional formats or doesn't feature Steve/Danny, for example, is always something where I KNOW it won't get as much attention because I know how fandom works and that lessens the sting because it doesn't HAVE to hold up to those other fics that perform way better, because I already know it's not really comparable. The truth is, of course, that most fic is not really comparable to other fic, but it’s easy to fall into that trap anyway. If I post something that seems like my average kind of work and it gets less kudos or comments than usual, I do start to doubt the fic and second-guess myself - is something about this weird? Is it too [insert quality x]? Is it bad? Did I unknowingly do something terrible and people are now avoiding me? The answer to all of those is probably no, and going through it a bunch of times has definitely helped, because what usually happens is that I end up somewhat avoiding the fic in question because it makes me a little ashamed and awkward to think about it (a relative failure! oh no! I'm human!) and then, eventually, I return and reread the fic. By that point I have enough distance from it in time that I can look at it a lot more objectively, and it's way easier to see what works and what does not than when I posted it and I had just read it a dozen times in twenty-four hours and the words were burned into my brain. And upon that reread, inevitably, I realize that, holy shit, it was NOT AS BAD as I had made it out to be in my mind! It’s actually kind of fun! Imagine the ego boost of realizing your most cringy recent work is actually pretty okay, haha, and it's silly, but it's a revelation every time. The quality of a fic is not dictated by how many people read it or comment on it or like it, and intellectually I absolutely know that, but it’s hard to remember when it’s about yourself and you’re still in that emotionally vulnerable place of having just shared your work with the world and it feels like the world is not as into it as you thought (or hoped) it’d be. It’s honestly very, very reassuring to have those experiences to fall back on, but sadly the only way I know to get there is to just tough it out and feel super awkward for a while.

When I’m writing, on the other hand, I usually don’t really think about what other people might think of it. I have the advantage that (pretty much) all of my work consists of fairly short stand alone stories, which means I don’t have to struggle with keeping my motivation up for a second chapter of something but I get to start fresh every time, and that’s nice, because I can just lose myself in the joy of throwing words around and making characters do things that make me giggle. That’s not to say I never think of the outside world while writing - I realized, pretty recently, that I occasionally end up constructing paragraphs or pieces of dialogue a certain way mostly so it will make for a good excerpt to put in the eventual fic description, which might give me a sense of accomplishment because it’s nice when things work out and look good, but in all fairness it’s probably far more motivated by attempts to package the finished work attractively so other people will want to click on it than by anything else. I don’t know if that’s a bad thing. I don’t think so - I don’t feel like it lessens my work and it doesn’t interrupt my enjoyment of it in the moment, which are the key elements for me - but other people might disagree.

But the heart of thing is, just, there are SO MANY factors that influence a fic’s numbers, and not all of them are visible (I’d argue most of them aren’t, in fact), and it always helps me to keep that in mind. It puts things in perspective somewhat and softens the harshness of a black and white kudo count judgment. Numbers can depend on when you post a fic (what day of the week, time of the year, time relative to big fandom moments, whether you’re in the middle of a global pandemic or not), how you pick your title, what you put in the description, how you use the tags, what genres or tropes are popular in your specific fandom, the genre of your fic in general (pwp as a rule tends to get lots of hits and few kudos or comments, for example, making it totally unfair to compare it to G-reated fluff fic with super different ratios), how much you’ve posted before (because if someone likes one of your works, they’re often likely to check if you have more in the same fandom), how many fics other people post around the same time (because yours might be gone from the first page of most recently updated works in a fandom or ship tag very quickly if others push it out), how big your fandom is(!!!) (over two thirds of my works on ao3 are for h50, but h50 only makes it into the top 10 of my most kudo’d works by the skin of its teeth) and definitely also what your fandom’s culture is like (compared to a lot of other fandoms, h50 fans are a-ma-zing when it comes to leaving comments, my gosh, and as a writer I adore all of you), how old your ao3 account is (the longer you’ve been around, the more likely a higher number of people is subscribed to you as an author or has read your previous work or has encountered your name, etc), how long your fic is (under a thousand words in my experience generally does less well than 1-5k, but longer fics might end up with lots of chapters which switches things up because people come back to it when there’s an update, and even if a long work is all in one chapter it will probably stand out for the wordcount and might attract attention that way, etc), whether or not your fic is part of a series (in my experience it will probably get more hits because it’s a chain of fics that leads you to the next one, but the kudos might not go up at the same rate because people might forget a kudo or reread previous works when a new one is added), whether you make a habit of commenting on other people’s fic (I’ve had comments saying MY comment on their work led them to my fic!), if you have social media like Tumblr or Twitter where you can promote your work (it’s advertising, basically), and any of a bunch of random little other factors. Sometimes, I see a sudden little cluster of kudos on an old fic in the daily ao3 kudos email, and I assume someone somewhere maybe recced that fic, but it usually remains a total mystery who or where or even if it happened at all and wasn’t just a weird coincidence to begin with. Sometimes the thing a fic’s popularity depends on is really just whether it clicks with people at that point in time, whatever that means, which is an even more impossible thing to grasp or predict than anything else.

Or you can look at things from a totally different angle and not try to make yourself care less about numbers, but just accept that you do because you’re human and we all crave validation, and instead try to roll with that. A brain hack: when I do start getting down about numbers, it also helps me to focus on one work and just... try to visualise what those kudo (or hit or bookmark or comment) counts mean, if you were to translate them to the real world. While it can be super helpful to remember that there’s a LOT going on that you can’t see and that’s virtually impossible to really explain, it’s also nice to somewhat do the opposite and try to make things as concrete as possible instead. I like measuring in school classes (~25-30 heads, I’d say) and “my fic only has fifty kudos but this other person’s has ten times as many” could easily make anyone sad and demotivated, but “my fic has fifty kudos and that’s TWO WHOLE CLASSROOMS packed full of people that all read my work and liked it so much they wanted to give me a little thumbs up for it” is actually pretty cool and encouraging, I think. Or you could measure in sports teams (I don’t know sports, but soccer has 11 players on the field per team, so as soon as your fic has 33 kudos that’s three teams which means you’ve got yourself a little beginning league! how exciting!) or in DnD campaigns (variable of course, but most of mine have had around four players plus a DM, so if you have twenty kudos? that’s FOUR WHOLE DnD campaigns that enjoyed reading your fic, and it’s fully up to you how many half-orcs that includes). You could apply this method using literally any other measurement that works for you, too. If you have a hard time painting a mental image of numbers, you could even open up a Paint doc or get a piece of paper and start counting out little dots or copy-pasted images of a person, or get a big bag of physically present M&Ms and count them out, or take a good look at your dog and then go around the neighborhood and collect forty-nine more dogs and pile them all into your home and be slightly frightened by the utter delighted fluffy chaos that ensues in your living room. That’s how many people liked your fic! That’s a heck of a lot of wagging tails! Who knew a kudo could bark this loudly!

Disclaimer: maybe keep the dog thing as your very last resort, because your neighbors might not be super into their pet getting dognapped for the purpose of visualizing fanfiction stats. The point is really just to remember that there’s an actual person behind every kudo you get, no matter what the cumulative number is, and even if you have seven or five or three kudos, that’s seven or five or three very real people that hit that button. That’s pretty damn awesome. Also keep in mind how you feel if you read a fic, and take some time to realize that every single person that left you a kudo went through that same process of spending time reading words (the words you wrote!) and experiencing that story and THAT’S why they left that kudo. It’s a real person’s real investment.

This ended up very long and rambly, so tl;dr: You are in no way alone in feeling that way, it's okay and normal and so very very human to feel like that, but you still shouldn't let it get you down, because numbers fake being meaningful very well but are deep down just little squiggles on your screen and they’re more scared of you than you are of them, while at the same time there are real individuals that enjoy your work even if you usually never see them. Your fic is worth posting. That’s the one factor in all of this that’s a constant, not a variable.

(And as a very important sidenote, just be kind to yourself, always. Does it truly stress you out? Are you feeling really bad about it today? Does it make your anxiety spike? Then give yourself room to take a little step back and allow yourself some time away from it. Go watch something you enjoy, or read something nice, or do something else that makes you feel good. Fic is something that should add to your life, not subtract from it. You don’t owe anyone anything, not even yourself in this context, and I used to push myself occasionally to get something finished TODAY, and eventually I started realizing, well, why? Why not instead of reading it over again just get some sleep or watch an episode of something I want to watch, especially if I literally just finished the fic and I feel a little unsure about it and it might actually be beneficial to me and my own feelings about it if I just give it a day or even a week and let it rest and then look at it again and THEN post it, if I want to, whether that’s with some changes beforehand or not? Who set me that deadline that’s apparently looming over me? I did, and it’s fake, and it’s there for absolutely no good reason. Breathe. Put yourself first. Be really really really selfish about your own fic writing experience, even, because it’s supposed to be something you enjoy (that’s what a hobby is!), and the rest is secondary.)

#anon #ask #writing #ao3 #it's very odd to get called a popular writer by the way oh my gosh #nice!!! so very nice!!! thank you!!! but also difficult to reconcile with my own internal image of myself #all the more evidence that brains lie to us all the time #*

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dokidoki-tae · 5 years

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Sorry if this is to political, but how would La Squadra deal with a s/o in the United States. Like a long distance relationship. Trump has rubbed me the wrong way. I just want to call Formaggio to bitch about this vile man. Like this stale Cheeto of a man doesn't understand that people immigrating is normal.

Politics is fine. I follow politics quite a bit because it affects my way of life, my family and friends, my community, and other disenfranchised communities, so I see it as my responsibility to pay attention to politics. But I’m actually pretty curious about the views they would hold if they existed in real life. They probably experience Silvio Berlusconi’s leadership (Italy has a president though? How does that work?). But Italy seems to have it’s own “complicated” relationship with immigrants and people of color too :/

This would be easier if I understood Italian politics though haha Italians give me your opinion on American and how it compares to your elected officials

Risotto: He doesn’t know (or care) much about American culture, but he wonders if you are around or experiences the amount of violence against minorities as he hears about on the news. What chances do you have in getting shot, he might wonder. He calls you to make sure you are alright whenever an incident happens. He’s never followed another country’s news, but here he is. He’s no stranger to what happens with the rise of fascism. His beloved country was a victim of it and he worries that you will directly experience it, and it does worry him. He tells you ways you can take precautions to be safe. It will probably stress you out more, but he has to teach you to watch out for yourself because he’s not there.

Prosciutto: He hates the long distance because he can’t check up on your mental, emotional, and psychological health regularly. He has to settle with calling you when he wakes up (the end of your day) and calls when you wake up (the end of his day). He always asks how things went. He wants you to use him to let out your frustration. He hates how stressed you get because of the state of your country. He understands since Italy has had its fair share of idiot leaders who he regularly complains about to the others. Eventually, he’ll ask if you’re willing to move to Italy to escape the toxic environment. He wants to be able to comfort you and be able to actually protect you.

Pesci: Doesn’t follow politics even in his own country, so he doesn’t understand how you’re feeling. In his mind, politicians lie, tell people what they want to hear, and are not good people. So you shouldn’t be surprised by it, right? It’s something he’s heard many people say before and what he learned through history. If you send him clips though, even he’s stumped when hears Trump speak. At first, he thought the translator was bad at his job, but no that’s how the man talks. He feels sorry for you for having to deal with that. He’s there to lend an ear because he doesn’t know what else he can offer to comfort you. He does always tell you to be careful though just in case you run into a bigot.

Formaggio: He doesn’t pay attention to politics either, and he bases all his judgment of what’s going on in your country based on your rants. He listens to you open up your heart to him about your anger and frustrations and fears. He never suspected this kind of thing was going on because he’s run into American tourist, and they always seem pretty happy and unconcerned. If you were to tell him he’s similar to, say, Mussolini, he’s going to understand immediately and might open himself up to rant. He’s another one to suggest to you to come to Italy because their food is better anyway. Italy also has its share of bigots but Formaggio promises to beat the shit out of them if they say anything to you.

Illuso: If he comes across American news, he finds it quite entertaining because it’s just so outlandish and ridiculous to him. He’ll make fun of your country’s politics and how ludicrous things are over there. You’ll have to be vulnerable to get sympathy from him because he doesn’t quite grasp the severity of human rights being stripped away from your or your loved ones. If you tell him that, he’ll become more serious and hear you out. He won’t make jokes at your expense especially if you’re genuinely concerned and scared about the things happening in your country. He too will offer to open up his room for you to live with him.

Melone: IMMA be real with you. Melone doesn’t seem to have the highest regards when it comes to women, BUT I don’t think he approves of your president's vulgarity. Melone has lived through Silvio Berlusconi leadership to know where your country might head. He will give warnings about the dangers of that sort of man being elected again. Overall, he won’t care too much about what happens to your country; he’s only concerned about you and will do what he can to take your mind off the things happening in your country.

Ghiaccio: Doesn’t really pay attention to American news, but when he somehow comes across it, he’s going to call you and scream, “WHY CAN’T YOUR DAMN PRESIDENT FORM A SINGLE FUCKING SENTENCE.” And you’ll be able to hear him punching something. It might be enough to get you to laugh, but he’s genuinely distraught about how this man got elected. He stereotypes Americans as being stupid (gee thanks) and your president is pretty much confirming his beliefs (but you’re enough to remind him that isn’t true). Don’t tell him about the electoral college.

#risotto nero #prosciutto #pesci #illuso #formaggio #melone #ghiaccio #jojo hcs #my writing #shay replies #Anonymous

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ascension-soliloquy · 5 years

Text

First time read of Mistborn book 1: The Final Empire

This is my first time doing something like this. I’m not sure how interesting it will be for anyone else. Usually when I read it’s more, well...I don’t know if passively is the right word, but I don’t normally take notes or write my thoughts down. I’m not doing a recap, I’m expecting you to have read the book and be familiar with it. I’m not doing in depth analysis on every chapter or every little plot point, I’m just writing down things whenever I think of them.

•So far I’m on chapter 17 and right now I only have one prediction. Reen will show up again at some point in the series, he will have power, either Misting or Mistborn, and there will be a confrontation between him and Vin. Either that or between both of them and their father. Or just between Vin and her father. I’m probably wrong. Haha

•Also, I’m guessing the blurbs at the beginning of each chapter are from the book Sazed is translating.

•Chapter 28.

“The Deepness must be destroyed... Many do not realize that it is sentient, but I have sensed its mind...the few times I have confronted it directly. It is a thing of destruction, madness, and corruption. It would destroy this world not out of spite or out of animosity, but simply because that is what it does.”

My guess is that rather than destroy the Deepness, he was possessed by it.

•From the start Vin reminded me of a combination of Min and Egwene from the Wheel of Time. I only know about BS from him finishing the WOT series, so I suppose comparisons are inevitable for me. When we first meet Vin she has short hair and wears boy clothes, so that’s like Min, and she is ambitious about learning magic, so that’s like Egwene. All three characters seem to be in the habit of doing what they want, rather than what they are told to do. I always liked Egwene and Min, but so far I think I might actually like Vin better. Maybe because she has a lot of POV in this book, whereas we had to wait a while to get POV from the other two in WOT.

[The next paragraph sort of contains spoilers for the last three books in the Wheel of Time]

I hope Elend doesn’t turn out to be the Gawyn of this story. When she was telling him about how skaa are intelligent, I was thinking, “no Vin! I don’t like the questions he’s asking you. Don’t trust him!” Then when he defended her to his friends, I was like, maybe he’s okay. Oh, but now he’s going to have her followed. Going behind her back, kinda getting Gawyn vibes. (I’m talking about what Gawyn did in the last three WOT books, so if you haven’t gotten that far, spoilers, so I won’t get into it here.)

•”Be careful, Mistress —become too fond of reading, and you may just turn into a scholar.”

Vin shook her head. “Not if all the books I read are going to end like this one!”

Rather meta, isn’t it?

•Chapter 30

F***

“And so the house war starts, Vin thought. Didn’t think I’d be the one to officially begin it.”

Indeed.

Maybe Vin is the Gawyn in this situation. Hahaha

It is pretty badass that she was able to defeat another Mistborn on her own, but I can imagine this will come back to bite her.

•”You’re no skaa—you’re just noblemen without titles.”

Dang, she told him. That whole speech was astounding.

“He stood, dumbfounded, feeling a surprising flush of ashamed guilt. And, for once, found himself without anything to say.”

•chapter 32

“Marsh said he’d leave a light burning if the other obligators were gone.”

I don’t like it. Ever since Marsh got the face tattoos I’ve had a bad feeling about him. I think he’s going to turn on Kell.

Oh...Or the Inquisitors will turn on Marsh. I wasn’t expecting that. Never mind. Though, who knows what information they got out of him before they killed him.

Then again, how do we know for certain that is Marsh’s body? It could be a ploy to make them think Marsh is dead. It could be anyone and they would never know. They couldn’t exactly get a DNA test done, and his skin has been ripped off, so a positive ID is difficult.

•Chapter 34 [LOTR, WOT, and Harry Potter spoilers—don’t want to assume everyone has read those]

So Kell is the Gandalf/Moiraine of this story. One difference is he left behind a body, unlike those other two, so not sure if there will be any coming back for him. I suppose Dumbledore didn’t come back (at least physically), so it wouldn’t be the first time.

•Chapter 36

In which Vin gets herself captured. Of course. In WOT it seemed like in just about every book someone was getting captured. It was one of my least favorite tropes of the series. Sometimes it was handled in an interesting way, but other times it was just annoying. I hope Vin is able to escape on her own rather than have to be rescued, and I hope this doesn’t become a recurring theme in this series.

I made the mistake of looking at someone’s cosplay photo in the Mistborn sub-reddit, and it was an alternate reality version of Vin where she had been made into a Steel Inquisitor. When the Inquisitor was holding something, hit Vin, and it faded to black, I was terrified she was going to wake up with spikes through her eyes. I guess I won’t be clicking on anything else in that sub for the time being. It’s funny, for the most part I avoided reading anything online about WOT while I was reading that series, but for some reason I’m being more daring with this one. Of course, I didn’t have a reddit account at the time, so this is all new to me.

Vin meets her father. Such a joyous family reunion. Aw, that didn’t last long. That wasn’t the confrontation I was expecting; more like a confrontation between him and the Inquisitors. There’s still time for a confrontation between Vin and Reen, I suppose.

The Lord Ruler orders her execution, but the Inquisitor convinces him to let them use her for a while longer. There’s no way possible that plan will backfire and allow her to escape or be rescued.

[The next paragraph contains spoilers for Wheel of Time book #2 The Great Hunt]

As much as I would prefer Vin to escape, I have a feeling Elend is going to be the one to rescue her. Then again, [WOT spoilers] Rand didn’t rescue Egwene from the Seanchan, it was Nynaeve, Elayne, and Min, something that set that scene apart from the typical damsel in distress sequence. That said, I wish there were more major female characters in this book. A Nynaeve, Elayne, and/or* Aviendha to Vin’s Egwene/Min. So who else is there besides Elend? Maybe one of the other Mistings, I suppose, but it seems like they might be busy with the rebellion at the moment. Sazed already rescued her once, so I don’t see that happening again so soon.

(*and/or...Andor haha WOT jokes, I crack myself up. Sorry, I’ll see myself out.)

•I’ve seen complaints about BS’s humor, but I’ve laughed at few things in this book, so maybe his sense of humor is similar to my own.

•Chapter 37

“Valette...she went into the palace a few hours back. I’m sorry lad. She’s probably in the Lord Ruler’s dungeons right now—assuming she’s even still alive.”

I can see my suspicions about where this is going coming true already. Elend to the rescue! Oh well, at least she rescued him once already, even though he wasn’t aware of it.

Reen is dead, unless the Inquisitor is lying. So much for my predicted confrontation. I did say I was probably wrong. He died protecting her. Some part of him must have cared about her.

For a minute there I thought Sazed was going to need to be rescued as well, but looks like he might be the rescuer after all. And now Vin gets to protect Sazed. Out of the available outcomes, this was probably the most satisfying. And here comes Elend. So he has his part to play. But Vin gets to save them all, so once again, best possible outcome.

•Chapter 38

“The Inquisitors would no longer bow before the dictates of inferior men.”

I wonder if the Inquisitors are the Terrismen the Lord Ruler was in contact with during his journey to the Eye of the World Well of Ascension. Some of them seemed to think they were superior to other men.

“A command of Allomancy...”

I guess not, since Terrismen don’t use Allomancy.

•Turns out that wasn’t Marsh’s body. Marsh the Inquisitor. Rather disturbing. At least he’s still on the side of the good guys.

•Ba’alzamon the Lord Ruler is defeated, but the Dark One Deepness is still left to threaten the world. For all this snark comparing it to WOT, this ending was satisfying.

•The Lord Ruler turned out to not be the person who wrote the journal, but one of the Terrismen. I still wonder if he was possessed by the Deepness? The Lord Ruler used both Allomancy and Feruchemy, so maybe it is possible at least some of the Inquisitors were Terrismen. I guess that remains to be seen.

•Vin came to the same realization about Reen that I did. That’s sweet.

•Earlier I compared Vin to Egwene and Min, but obviously there is an aspect of her that is like Rand as well, seeing as how she is the main character, and she is the one who defeats the Lord Ruler.

This has been fun, at least for me. On to the next book.

#mistborn liveblog #elend #kelsier #vin #cosmere #fantasy #the final empire #mistborn #brandon sanderson

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tang-wei · 7 years

Text

Ichinose Guren’s World Resurrection at 19 Volume 1 Chapter 1 translation~

Title: After the ruin

Translator: @tang-wei

Raws: My own copy of the LN

The masterpost, in case you need it

Warnings: Gore

T/N: I’m so sorry this is so friggin late ;-; I hope the length makes up for it!!

"Shit, shit, what!?"

Guren cried out.

Underground in Shinjuku.

Deep deep underground, in a loud voice, he cried.

"Shit, shit, what’s with that!? Why aren’t they coming back to life!"

Opening one of the seven coffins, he looked inside and shouted.

Of the seven, there were miracles in six of them.

The dead have been resurrected.

Although the neck has been cut from the body, they were re-joined as if nothing had happened. With red veins, the heart pulses.

Friends. Family─ Goshi, Mito, Sayuri, Shigure and two men who he did not even know of are starting to be revived.

They were sleeping now.

As if they did not realise that they were dead until just a while ago, the four friends and two strangers slept.

"You didn’t come back to life! You should be alive!"

Screaming, as the body in the last coffin had not been revived, Guren pounded his friend’s chest.

"Revive!"

Hiiragi Shinya, his heart did not beat.

"Revive! Revive him! I beg of you!"

But his heart did not beat.

He did not start breathing.

* The wounds were covered. The fatal hole in his chest was filled. But yet, Shinya was not revived.

"Shinya! Shinya!"

He called his name.

But, he would not wake up.

"Hey Shinya! Get up! Wake up!"

He shook his body.

Punched him in the chest.

He begged.

And,

"You should have been revived! It was promised!"

Guren cried out.

"Who! Who will be revived!? God!? The devil!? Or some other thing!? I touched the taboo! I admit it! Punish me! I will receive any punishment! So, so please revive Shinya!"

So, looking up at the ceiling, he wished to God.

But there was no reply.

There was no reply from God.

Nevertheless, elsewhere, came a voice.

In the huge underground laboratory.

A person drunk on seeing the comedic story of the sins that human beings have committed─

"Hm~ He should be alive again. Did something just fail here?"

He said as he came closer.

He had long silver hair, and was a terribly beautiful man.

Red eyes.

Sharp teeth.

A vampire.

Who is also a progenitor.

One who was called Ferid Bathory approached him slowly.

He looked down at the dead Shinya. Looked at him, and laughed.

"Hm~ What a beautiful face of death. He can be left dead........"

"Shut up vampire!"

"How scary. But, ever since I was born, I have never been silent. As Papa and Mama have said. Ever since I came out of the womb, I had an incorrigible mouth. Even so, they were still my parents. What was it again. What were we talking about~ Anyways──"

Ferid smiled and said.

“I heard your orders, young kid.”

Then, he reached out towards Shinya.

Guren grabbed his arm.

“Don’t touch.”

“Why? He’s already dead.”

“He will be revived. That’s why I’m─”

“Did you touch the taboo?”

“..............”

So. That’s it. He performed an experiment that he should have never touched.

The experiment that the vampires were desperately trying to stop.

《Human resurrection》

That was a sin that was never allowed.

Who would be angered?

What is he being punished?

He did not know.

But, Mahiru said this.

After resurrection, the destruction would begin─

The world would be destroyed.

Those with demons, and children will survive. The population would be reduced to less than 10%.

Even if one risked all of that, the revived human being becomes an incomplete body which can only live for another 10 years.

“................”

And, he did not know if those words were true or not.

Underground here.

It is isolated from the world.

Therefore, the world outside may have ended already.

Or what Mahiru said was a lie, and perhaps nothing has happened.

If the resurrection goes well, there may not even be a punishment for it.

But he made this decision thinking that either outcome would be acceptable.

Even if there was punishment, he himself, his family, his friends, even for just 10 years, he wanted to spend one more time with them.

For that, just for a moment’s pleasure and attachment, Guren sold the world.

So,

“........Shinya, he needs to be revived here.”

He said.

If he couldn’t, then there was no point in touching the taboo.

Ferid laughed loudly.

“What arrogance. I like it.”

Guren ignored him and pounded on Shinya’s chest once again.

“Shinya, wake up.”

But he did not wake.

“I beg you please get up!”

He shouted.

But he did not wake.

Wake up from the dream, always, always, always, there is hope for another 10 years. But this nightmare will never end. It is getting worse.

Again, the vampire reached out his hand. Guren could not react.

Vampires move fast.

Abnormally fast.

In addition, this is a nobleman. Compared to ordinary vampires, Ferid’s strength was in a different dimension. And then, he roughly thrust his hand into Shinya’s chest.

Finally,

“You”

Guren tried to shout, but it was too late. There was a hole in his chest, and Ferid was holding Shinya’s heart. Putting a lot of strength, as if he were grasping an air pump. Roughly, he squeezed the heart.

He killed him.

He thought.

Shinya was destroyed.

He thought.

No, Shinya was already dead.

“Please stop!”

Guren shouted─

“Haha.”

Shinya’s mouth moved.

Then, his chest rose, as he breathed in air.**

Huuu huuu

The sounds of breathing in.

The sounds of breathing out.

“Arise, Shinya.”

Ferid said.

“Ah ♪ Ah ♪ Ah ♪ Is this not okay?”

Holding it in his hands, gripping gently. As if to replace the heart, Ferid was causing the heart to beat.

“Oh ~ it started to move on its own ─ How amazing. I’m a genius surgeon.”

He pulled out his hand.

Blood began returning to the pale Shinya. The wound in his chest began closing up. Huuu-huuu, his thin breathing turned into the breaths of someone who was asleep.

He has been resurrected!

Shinya has been successfully resurrected!

However, he did not say this out loud.

He did not know if the resuscitation has been completed, so he didn’t want to accidentally touch him.

After all, he didn’t know what kind of mechanism allowed people to be revived.

He also did not know why this touches the taboo.

However, he was revived.

He did not know the reason, but Shinya, he began breathing again──

“......Wah”

Guren cried out.

"............ Hahaha", he had a face that was both laughing and crying at the same time.

Mahiru is dead.

He touched a taboo, but still, he was able to resurrect his friends.

And as soon as he understood it, his whole body suddenly felt very fatigued. He had not taken a good rest for days. The body could feel it.

Running away from pursuers from 『Mikado no Oni』, killing countless people to arrive here and finally making it to this place.

And because of that, many friends died.

Mahiru also died.

He had lost everything──

It’s normal for it to be over.

The story is over.

A bad ending.

Family and friends are both dead, and he is unable to get them back. The situation could not get any worse.

But, this story is way ahead of that.

It is already beyond that.

“…………”

On his own, what can one obtain?

But there is at least one thing he knows.

That he had broken his promise to Shinya. That he had broken his promise to all his friends.

Without making a mistake while being weak, no one will die here, and the taboo would not be touched.

Guren fell to the floor on his knees.

He was exhausted.

However, just as his whole body weakened.

“.......Hahaha”

He laughed drily.

And the vampire looked down at him intriguingly.

"Wow, that sounds fun."

Guren sank to the floor, his body bloodied, and he looked up at Ferid.

Ferid’s arms had no blood. He had put his hands in Shinya’s chest.

But he was not soiled by blood at all.

Shinya’s blood had already dried up.

Shinya died and was revived.

God does not allow the experiment.

The world does not allow the experiment.

And the vampires trying to protect the order of the world do not allow the experiment.

Guren looked up at Ferid and said.

"Did you come to kill me?"

Ferid, however, turned his back and walked to another coffin.

One of the seven coffins.

Goshi, Mito, Shigure, Sayuri, Shinya and an unknown man.

Ferid peered into the coffin and said.

“........It looks like something that tastes different from you. I prefer children’s blood.”

While saying this, he grabbed the man out of the coffin. Gently, he grasped the man’s neck and lifted him out.

Immediately, the man woke up.

“Uu, uwah, what the hell happened!”

The man saw Ferid,

“Who are you! Where am I!”

Then, Ferid replied happily.

“Do you remember what happened before the end?”

“The end? What are you talking about?”

"Last memory, the last memory, what was the last memory you had?"

"....... Last, last ...... No, my memory....”

And then he had a thinking face on. He appeared terribly confused. Of course. The man in the coffin was dead. Guren confirmed that his breathing and his heart completely stopped. He died and was revived. It was as confusing as possible.

But Guren looked at the man and narrowed his eyes.

The man was confused.

There was no memory of death, or perhaps the events leading up to his death were too shocking, so it was too much to remember──?

The man continued.

“......Oh, I was chosen.......if I became a subject in this experiment....all her medical expenses would be covered.”

Ferid nodded his head pleasantly.

“Well, what was she sick with?”

“...Ah”

“What disease?”

“Elijah’s disease.” (T/N: This is not a real disease)

“I’ve never heard about it.”

“If you don’t treat it, one can only live up to 30 years, but it's a special illness, so treatment is very expensive.”

“Wow... how old is she now?”

“22.”

“Ah. She’s above 13 years of age. She’s dead now.”

“No way...I took part in the experiment, they said they will pay for her treatment! Treat her right away!”

The man roared. He grabbed Ferid’s arm and shouted.

“You promised! You promised!”

He shouted.

But who promised that.

The 《Hyakuya Sect》?

『Mikado no Oni』?

Or was it another group?

It is possible that it could have been Mahiru.

This is Mahiru’s plan.

Mahiru’s plan to escape fate.

The man shouted.

“Then, then, she’s already dead!”

He was crying. The man was crying.

His life and fate were dramatic. Everyone has a fate. That fate is like drifting off the coast to sea. Even if one looks around, he cannot find land, and one’s tiny self is lost. And when a big wave that is created by a storm comes crashing down, it will consume all human beings.

At least, Guren knows about that kind of world, but hasn’t seen it yet.

“You promised! They promised to treat her!”

The man shouted. Glenn stared at him. It felt like he was watching himself.

However, Ferid laughed with a frightening smile.

"No, she's not dead because of Elijah's disease. The cause of her death is something else."

The man looked at Ferid while crying, and said.

"What have you done to her!?"

"I did nothing, he was the one who did it."

And then he looked over.

While laughing Ferid looked over at Guren with red eyes glazed in interest.

Then the man pointed at him.

There was hatred in the eyes of the man. He understood that feeling painfully. There was someone to take revenge on. Everyone needed some meaning to live on for; to live in a world where there is only despair.

The man said.

"Really? Did you do it?"

Guren did not answer.

"............"

"Did you do it !?"

"............"

"Answer! You killed her!"

"............"

"Die."

"............"

"I will kill you."

"............"

“No matter what happens, I will definitely do it!”

Ferid, upon hearing that she was older than 13, had said that she was dead.

Mahiru also said such a thing.

That in this world, only children will survive. Or, someone with a demon, as ordinary people cannot survive.

If that is true and the world outside of this laboratory was already ruined, then that man’s feelings would be reasonable.

He would want to kill.

Guren thought that he ought to be killed.

For his ego, he destroyed all human destinies and destroyed the world──he thought that he should have been killed.

"............"

Ferid laughed,

"Alright alright, if you want kill, you can do it now, but I wonder if you have enough power. He is strong. For his ego, he managed to sell out the entire world. Let me see, I wonder if your ego can beat his ego.”

And the Ferid released his grip. The man fell to the floor and ran to Guren immediately.

“I will kill youuuuuuuu!!!!!”

He shouted while crying. He started beating him up. Guren did not resist it. He was honestly being beaten up. Cheeks. Chest. Stomach. The man put his thumb through his eyeball, but he also accepted it. He felt his eye collapse and the man’s finger in his eye.

However, he did not feel any pain at all.

The man is an ordinary human being.

But the 《Kiju》, the demon, had possessed him in his state of ruin.

“Die, die, die, die”

While the man screamed, he continued to hit Guren's face and he fell on the floor, but he could not die.

The regeneration of the 《Kiju》 is much faster than the power of the man, so his eyeball, his skin kept on regenerating again and again.

“What the hell are you! What the hell are youuuuu!”

Slowly, Guren grabbed one of the man’s arms.

“Let go!”

“......I’m sorry. I can’t be killed by you.”

“Don’t bullshit! Return her to me!”

"... I don’t know about her, but there is something I want to ask you."

"Shut up, shut up, shut up, I want to kill you ... ...."

"Do you have no memory about your death?"

He said.

That information was important for Guren.

It was important whether Shinya, Goshi, Mito, Shigure and Sayuri have memories of when they died.

If there was......

"............"

It would be despair.

The responsibility of touching the taboo─ they had to carry it together.

No, they would not forgive him for doing such a thing. They promised differently. He should not have done such a thing.

But, if that memory does not exist ─

Guren said.

"You were dead, you died, do you remember that?"

Hearing this, the man’s eyes opened wide.

He had a frightened expression.

His face was contorted into fear.

"What are you talking about."

"Do you remember you death─"

But then, the man pressed his head.

“S─stop. Uwah, uwah, waaa.”

He cried out strangely.

“Lies. No. What. What did you do to me........”

Immediately, light began to shine from his eyes. Something inside began shining, and the whole body and soul looked as if it were being eroded.

The whole body glowed.

But it was a sinful light.

It looked like that. he do not know the reason. But in his mind, he understood. It was understood by something.

He did what he should not have done.

He touched something that he should never have touched.

It is a sin. A punishment. A taboo. It is desperation.

And so, that desperation brightly shines out of that man’s body and scrapes the insides.

“Uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah”

The man’s voice became sharp as his body floated into the air.

Screaming.

Cursing.

Desperation.

Resentment.

And then, the man’s body shone brightly, and with a high-pitched sound, exploded and scattered.

“No.”

Looking at that, Guren said with a pained voice.

The man was gone.

There was nothing left of him.

As if he had never existed before, everything completely disappeared.

"............"

Guren narrowed his eyes.

The man─ once he was told that he had died before, he disappeared.

Seeing this, Ferid said,

“Oh.”

Then,

“That’s amazing. You managed to kill that man with your ego. As Mahiru-chan has said, you are being strongly being possessed by a demon. Or are you already one now?”

"............"

When Guren looked at Ferid, the vampire seemed to be enjoying himself.

“There were seven coffins, and in two, there were unknown bodies. Why? Because they were meant to be like manuals. They were intended to be used as experiments to ensure the successful resurrection of friends. And so they were used as such. The results have come out. Apparently, your friends would not remember being resurrected. They would disappear if they knew. And so they must never know. This is what the experiment has showed.”

But ignoring that, Guren stood up. The eye that was damaged by the man has already been completely restored. After all, he was no longer a human being.

No, it is because he is not a human being, that he was able to survive.

When one resurrects humans, Mahiru said that the punishment of god will fall.

It is said that virus would spread and everyone over the age of 13 would die.

However, Guren was already 16 years old. In other words, at that age, he should have been infected with the virus and died.

But, he is still alive ─ was it because he already had a demon in him?

Or, already, as Ferid said, became a perfect demon?

"............"

Guren turned his gaze towards the coffin in which his friends were held in.

Shinya, Goshi, Mito, Shigure, Sayuri, they were sleeping.

Looking at their sleeping faces, he said.

"...... These guys are smart. When they wake up here, they would realize that they have died."

"Hmmm, then what shall we do?"

The man woke up the moment he was taken out from the coffin. Shinya and the rest may wake up as soon as they are out.

Then,

"......I have to get some anesthesia, they still have to stay asleep for a while longer."

He looked around at his surroundings. This was a laboratory. The laboratory which was conducting a study on the taboo to resurrect humans. There should be anesthesia.

As soon as he began looking for it, he found it.

Anesthesia. Confession agents. Timed poisons. Everything, from drugs that he was familiar with to those that he had never heard of before.

He chose one of them and injected it to Goshi.

For a while, his friends would not wake up.

Still, he waited till the medicine worked properly. This medicine causes one to lost consciousness in a few minutes, but he waited for twenty minutes to make sure.

However, it was not enough. He thought that the effect of the resurrection experiment would cancel the effect of anesthesia at the moment the body was taken out from the coffin. Thinking about the possibility of them waking up, he grasped at Shinya’s neck with the syringe in his left hand.

His clothes were bloody.

Clothes that had the enemy's blood, Shinya’s own blood, and perhaps surely, Guren's blood as well.

Grasping the collar,

"Let's go, Shinya, don’t get up."

He said.

As normal, Shinya was sleeping. He seems to be comfortable and was sleeping soundly.

After watching for a while, he pulled out Shinya from the coffin.

"............"

"Shinya."

"............"

"Shinya, are you sleeping?"

"............"

"Are you asleep? Are you waking up?"

"............"

"Good."

Guren breathed a sigh of relief. He hoisted Shinya on his shoulder. He looked up. What should he do next? How can he make it so that Shinya would not know that he died and was revived?

Ah, that's right. First of all, it was necessary to see the outside world.

He did not understand anything yet.

As Mahiru said, the world has already been ruined.

Or, were they all just Mahiru’s twisted words?

He saw a hole in the center of the seven coffins, a sacrifice for resurrection.

A Japanese sword which fits perfectly in the hole.

It was a 《Kiju》 weapon.

Guren’s weapon that contained the demon 《Noya》.

But 《Noya》 said last time.

He was saying in a disturbed voice ─ that he has incorporated Mahiru.

Mahiru pushed 《Noya》 into her chest and disappeared.

He did not know whether she was dead or not.

Her steps are too fast, and he does not always know what he should do.

Guren looked at that sword.

Is it 《Noya》 or Mahiru?

However, he thought that he would need weapons if they were to go outside.

They were always being chased by enemies until they reached here. There may be enemies outside. Then, they would need a weapon.

Or because of this resurrection, the world has already undergone drastic changes, and it may be a more dangerous place - if this were to happen, a weapon would be needed.

But Guren did not feel like pulling out his sword.

If he pulled it out, the resurrection may come to an end.

He thought that Shinya, Goshi, Mito, Shigure and Sayuri might die again.

So, while holding Shinya, he said,

“.....Sorry. Wait a little while longer, everyone. I’m going to see the outside first.”

"............"

Of course no one answered. They were put to sleep by the anesthesia.

Guren nodded, satisfied, and began walking.

Then, there was a high pitched sound, like metal clashing against something.

Guren’s sword was dancing in the air. Then, that sword returned to the sheath that was hanging at Guren’s wasit.

"............"

He looked down at the sheath.

He looked down at the sword that returned to his waist.

Then, he listened.

"......《Noya》 ?"

"............"

There was no reply.

"Mahiru?"

"............"

There was still no reply.

It turned out that the sword was different from the previous one. 《Noya》 was still deeply intertwined with himself. Therefore, he knew that the sword that returned to his waist was something different.

However, it was not a situation to figure out what it is.

He had to ensure that Shinya and the others were safe.

He continued to walk.

Ferid appeared from behind.

"Are you going out?"

"Yeah."

"I'm excited to see what’s going on outside."

"You don’t know what happened?"

“Just rumours. Rumours about how it will be when the resurrection happens.”

“What kind of rumor is it.”

“It’s what you know.”

And that is ruin.

Only demons and children can survive in this world.

Guren walked out of the laboratory, which lead to long corridors.

Holding Shinya on his shoulder, he had to transfer several elevators to go out to the ground level.

Ferid also followed. This guy was having a lot of fun in this situation.

A road at the ground level.

Every human being who was travelling on the road was dead. But he did not know if they died of virus. While they were on their way to that ceremony place, they killed many enemies, and were able to advance, so these deaths may not be due to the virus.

Besides, all of them here were supposed to have the power of 《Kiju》.

Then, it is because of their own killing that these people have died here.

When they were on the third elevator, Ferid said.

"A massacre."

And Guren replied.

"So says the blood sucking vampire."

"We don’t kill that much, because we only take the amount of blood we need."

"Wow"

“What kind of reaction was that. Show some interest at least.”

Hearing this, Guren turned to look at Ferid.

"...... Why didn’t you kill me? Aren’t you supposed to stop people from touching the taboo?"

"Yeah, I guess so"

"Then why didn't you do it?"

"I don't like to work."

“Then if the world ended, you too........”

Then, Ferid interrupted, saying,

“If we both committed the same crime, are you going to feel more relaxed? Haha that’s good. Do you want to split the sin with me?”

"............"

“It’s fine. If you’d like, since this sin is so huge, we can make a rule that allows that, since it lightens your burden.”

“By the way, as I’ve told you just now, vampires really don’t kill that many humans. There is no such desire. Vampires don’t have that much desire. There’s only a desire for blood, and despair for a life that is too long.”

"............"

“So I don't kill much. Because there is no meaning in killing. Or we kill too much. So much so that I don’t see any meaning in it. The heart is broken. Well, which one am I? Is there any meaning for you? I’m broken, so even if we split the sin in two, the heart won’t be at peace. Because you aren’t broken. There is no guilt for the abnormal person. Well then, which are you?”

Guren looked over at Ferid who was speaking noisily.

“Not interested.”

He said once more.

Because it is surely the latter.

Ferid had intelligent eyes. Eyes that were smiling and laughing, there was scarily impressive intelligence behind them, and there was madness, but there in the depths of madness, seemed to be intelligence.

After watching those happy eyes for a while, Guren said,

“Well, which one are you?”

“Which do you think?”

“I don’t know.”

“Hahaha ... But well, I don’t even know about myself, but mama said.”

“Mama?”

“Yes, the woman who gave birth to me. She was a beauty.”

“So what did your mama say about you?”

Ferid smiled,

“Mama said,”

And then raising his hands, as if he were putting on a play,

“Why did you do this? Why are you doing this? So terrible, so terrible.”

"............"

"Oh, but please, Ferid, do not kill me please ...please...~kyaaaa ..."

“......Not funny at all.”

“Yeah, for sure, mama didn’t find it funny when she died too.”

"............"

"Fufu, hahaha, hahahaha"

Ferid was having a lot of fun, and in the elevator, he was smiling.

Guren did not quite know whether the story was a joke or a real story.

It is that madness Guren could feel again.

Or intelligence.

And that feeling, he felt before.

Even when talking to Mahiru, he was attacked by the same feeling all the time.

A fear that was never ending.

Ah, no, with Mahiru, he felt as if there was a little more reasoning─

“I’d like to ask something.”

Said Guren. He was a little interested in Ferid. To see if this was a collaboration with Mahiru or not. If they had met, what kind of collaborations would these two abnormal people have?

Ferid, seeing this, said.

“What is it, Ichinose-kun?”

“Have you been in contact with Mahiru?”

“Yep. We had sex.”

“Tch”

“I’m joking.”

“What?”

“It’s the truth.”

“Huh!?”

“Just joking~”

It’s no good.

As expected, it’s impossible to have a conversation with him─

However, Ferid suddenly moved. Guren was caught by the neck. In the elevator, forcibly gripped, pushed against the wall by─

"Urgh"

He can only hear his voice.

Ferid's face came closer.

Red eyes.

The bright red pupil was dilated.

Ferid opened his mouth wide. There were sharp fangs there, and he spoke.

“Your blood seems to be more tasty than Mahiru-chan’s.”

"............"

Damn it─ he tried to open his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

He tried grabbing Ferid's hair with the hand that was not holding Shinya, but it was impossible.

The difference in power was akin to a kindergartener being suppressed by an adult, and it was despairing.

“......Gurk.”

Ferid seems to be enjoying himself.

“That's why I want to drink your blood, because I am strong, I can forcibly drink from you.”

"............"

“But then it's boring. So boring. It's boring unless you want me to drink your blood from the bottom of your heart.”

"............"

"Somehow, even though I am a vampire, there is such a desire."

"............"

Gururu gurururu guru, Ferid said as he tightened his hand around Guren’s throat.

Pale, smooth skin; an abnormally beautiful face. But he did not think it was beautiful. He was fearful. Fearful of the abnormally beautiful person that was near him.

A crazy vampire progenitor is here.

Ferid then said,

“Oh, let's do this then, let's suck the blood of your important friends first."

"!?"

“So let’s kill. Isn’t this amazing? Selling the world at a great price, to desperately revive a friend, and then suddenly, I will drink their blood and kill them.”

“Guh─”

Then, Guren put more power into his arm. In the arm that was not holding Shinya, he concentrated the curse.

The demon’s power coursed through his whole body.

Power. Strength.

Kill him here. It would be bad unless he killed him.

He do not know whether it was 《Noya》 or Mahiru, but he have the power to kill him─

But, his face was hit strongly.

“Urgh.”

He was attacked at the stomach, rupturing his internal organs.

Guren spat out a lot of blood.

“Oops.”

Ferid took a step back to avoid the blood.

His body did not move. It does not move. His knees broke, and he collapsed to the floor.

Waving the hand he had used to hit Guren about, he said.

“Yeah, but you can’t die now. I know that. Even though I tortured you, you are still possessed by that demon."

"............"

“The internal organs have ruptured. But they will be restored. People are beautiful because they will die soon.”

As he said that, the vampire picked up Shinya. The Shinya who was still sleeping.

Damn it. Damn it. What should he do.

Ferid opened his mouth wide and brought his mouth close to Shinya’s neck.

"……Stop."

Finally, his voice came out. The restoration of internal organs had begun.

Then, Ferid stopped moving. Instead of looking at Shinya’s neck, cold red eyes looked over to Guren.

And almost gladly,

“......Eh?”

He said.

And Gurencanswered.

"……Please stop."

"... ... ... ...Eh? What? Please stop it what, Master?"

“.......By asking you to stop, will you stop?”

“I wonder. I'd like to see your originality. But, think about it. Who was the one who made Hiiragi Shinya-chan’s heart beat again? Although you may have persevered and worked hard for the resurrection resuscitation, ah, but you are indebted to the genius surgeon. I wonder where the fee is.”

“......I am incredibly thankful.”

“Ah, you’re only saying thank you with your mouth?”

Hearing this, Guren looked over at Shinya. The floor numbers were displayed over his head; they were steadily heading for the ground level. They would arrive at the ground level soon.

And so, they managed to survive and head out to the ground level.

So─

"... .... Haaa, I understand."

Guren said.

Then, he loosened the collar of the combat uniform and exposed his neck.

Then he felt the desire Ferid had for the first time.

Ferid audibly gulped.

"Suck my blood."

Guren said, and Ferid laughed.

"Is that the tone of voice you use to appeal?"

"You said you want to see originality."

“Haha, alright ore-sama.***”

The vampire lowered Shinya. And he approached and lifted Guren up slightly. He pushed back his hair a little to reveal his neck.

“Finally in the truest sense, you have saved Hiiragi Shinya-chan. Just a while ago, I was seriously ready to kill him.”

“Take my blood.”

“That was wonderful. Alright. Let’s play this game.”

Ferid opened his mouth. He thrust his fangs into Guren’s throat.

Gyu, gyu rururu, gyururururu, his blood was sucked.

As Guren’s blood was sucked, he felt some kind of pleasure.

He knew that already, from when Mahiru had sucked his blood. When his blood was sucked, and when he was steps away from death, his brain releases a certain kind of pleasure hormone.

In order to avoid drowning in that pleasure, Guren looked up at the ceiling of the elevator.

The floor number display.

The floor number showed,

7 levels underground.

6 levels underground.

5 levels underground.

Blood was being sucked. Blood was being sucked.

4 levels underground.

3 levels underground.

2 levels underground.

Gyu rururu, gyururururu

1 level underground.

Arriving at ground level.

As if it were visible from inside the elevator,

“Ah, we’ve arrived.”

Ferid said, removing his mouth from Guren’s neck.

“Oh, that was delicious, your blood tasted like sin. Let's see what has happened outside."

He threw Guren on the floor.

A lot of his blood has been sucked out, and he had no strenght.

The curse. He had to let the curse restore his blood.

"............"

The inside of his head was muddled. He could not see clearly.

However, he understood that the door of the elevator slowly opened.

Outside the elevator was supposed to be Shinjuku.

This is a laboratory located in the underground of Shinjuku.

If the virus had spread and all of the adults were dead, the situation of the outside world will be serious.

The door opened. Light shone into the elevator.

Ferid turned around, and looked out.

Then, to the vampire, Guren asked,

"... ... ... How is it outside?"

“Hm? It’s wonderful.”

"…………What does that mean?"

"Ah, there are enemies. You might be killed. Would you like me to protect you?"

“Enemies? What on earth...”

“You don’t have time to think about it. So. Beg me to defend you. Make a deal with me.”

“......What.”

“Shut up. Do it. Beg me. And I will guide you in this ruined world.”

As he said this, Ferid’s hands went to the sword at his waist.

Ruin.

The world has been ruined.

So that means that the virus has spread.

All the adults have died, and the world has changed.

Because of himself.

Because of his ego.

But there was a voice from outside the elevator.

All the adults were supposed to have died, but they heard a voice.

It was a woman's voice. A beautiful voice.

That voice said,

"Ferid Bathory, what on earth are you doing?"

“Hi Sairen. How are you?”

“Stop joking. This is the area you're responsible for. But I heard you arrived late and couldn’t stop the experiment. Despite that, why are you here?”

To that question, Ferid stepped out of the elevator while pulling out the sword at his waist.

“Oh, you misunderstood. I just arrived and I’m surprised...”

“Don’t come closer! Why are you drawing your sword?”

“It’s not what you think.”

“Besides, I am the 6th progenitor. You are not my opponent──”

“Ahahahahahahaha”

Ferid jumped out of the elevator.

“What is this. All members, attack! The 7th seat progenitor Ferid Bathory has rebelled...damn, my arm, you low life, dieeeeeeeee!”

Then, Guren heard the sounds of swords clashing many times.

Guren’s body still did not recover for a few minutes.

The internal organs were destroyed.

He was short of blood.

Ah, he was hungry too. The energy left in his body was not enough.

Still, he could not abandon his responsibility and die here.

So, while falling on the floor, he could see Shinya sleeping sideways.

Two of them in the elevator, both of them having fallen were unable to move,

"Ha, haha, hahahaha, what is this. What do you think, Shinya?"

He tried asking, but Shinya was still on the floor asleep, his face peaceful.

“How cheeky.”

"............"

"Something seems to be strange outside the elevator, everything is probably ruined, and everyone is dead."

"............"

"It's because of me."

"............"

"I’m bad, I’m ......."

"............"

“But it’s because I wanted to spend a little more time with you, with everyone. Isn’t it?”

"............"

"Is it wrong"

"............"

"But I've already done it. Please forgive me."

No. If the world outside is as ruined as Ferid says...

A massacre. The worst slaughter that has ever happened.

How can one repent for that sin.

The internal organs have been repaired to a level where he could move again.

“Ah, but I’m still short of blood.”

And he stood up.

Outside the sound of swords clashing has stopped. He understood that sign. The battle was over.

Guren said to Shinya after pushing the button to exit the elevator.

"Hey, I'm going to look outside. Wait a while for me."

And he went outside.

This elevator was different from the one they took when they came, it was for an emergency escape to the ground level.

So it was something that could go directly to the ground level. He did not know where he was, but there was a sidewalk near to the entrance of the subway.

Ferid was not there.

The other vampire was not there.

However, there was a quiet world.

And as far as he could see, there was a mountain of corpses that filled the quiet world.

Numerous people were lying dead around the entrance of the subway and the area surrounding it.

There was no way forward if he wanted to avoid the corpses.

All the dead bodies had died clutching their chests or necks, and their faces were frozen in a pained expression.

The number was countless.

“........Ha. Ha.”

Several cars have crashed and overturned. Fire erupted from the streets and the sound of explosion reverberated many times over and over again from somewhere, but he could not hear people's voices. He could not hear any screams.

Death.

A city of death.

Everyone was dead.

"...... Ha, ha, ha."

As far as one could see, destruction.

As far as one could see, despair.

His breathing got faster.

His heart beat faster.

It's ruin.

It was truly ruined.

Everyone died.

He killed them himself.

He stared at the mountains of dead bodies.

Perhaps all the humans around the world were dead.

No, Mahiru said,

"... ... Children ...... weren’t the children supposed to be alive?"

He looked around, but nobody was alive. But, he noticed that there was no dead bodies of children. But this may be because this place was the business district of Shinjuku, and there were no children in the first place.

"... ... Haa, ha, ha, ha."

He was feeling so much despair, he wanted to throw up. He clutched his chest. To survive in such a world, what should he do?

“Why did I survive. For what reason.....”

Saying this, he looked back. Shinya was sleeping on the floor of the elevator.

His family was alive and sleeping.

"............"

His eyes welled up. He found that tears were spilling.

One can not save anything while crying.

One can not save anyone while crying.

These tears, does God see them?

Crying while doing such a thing, what hypocrisy.

With tears in his eyes, he looked up at the sky.

A clear sky without clouds.

A beautiful night sky.

“......Ah damn it, what should I do.”

There was no answer.

Wiping his tears with a blood stained arm.

There is no reason to cry.

He made the decision.

Resurrection.

Touching the taboos.

And the world ended.

That was what he decided. With the information he had on hand, he decided to proceed.

It was nobody else’s fault. It was all his responsibility.

"............"

And if he were to mention it, there was a possibility that Shinya would disappear if he heard about it.

So it is not permissible to talk about it anymore.

It is not allowed to complain.

It is not allowed to talk to someone.

It is not allowed to make a troubled face.

He should look surprised at this new world with Shinya, Goshi, Mito, Shigure and Sayuri.

He had to despair and hate the person that made this happen.

Otherwise Shinya would notice that he was the one who did this. The one that started the resurrection.

So, he can never cry and feel sorry about this sin.

This was the last time.

“Uh, uwh, uwah.”

Here, the last moment where one could cry.

And so,

“Uwaaaaaaaaaaah.”

He cried. He hit the ground in despair and wept.

His voice echoed through the beautiful night sky.

And no one noticed it.

Because everyone died.

Because he killed everyone.

".................."

After weeping till his throat was sore, he stood up.

There was no tears anymore. However, he wiped his hands across his face several times, so as not to leave any tears behind.

He then breathed deeply.

And threw up.

So he could calm down.

He was ready to carry the sin.

He raised his face, returned to the elevator, lifted Shinya’s body, and said.

“Live, Shinya.”

!!CHAPTER 1 END!!

Translation notes:

* The wounds were covered. The fatal hole in his chest was filled.

This is the best way to translate this sentence without having to write a paragraph on it's meaning LOL. For anyone who's confused, what it means that the injuries that killed him have been healed. To stay truer to the original text, I chose to use the more literal (and awkward) translation.

** Then, his chest rose, as he breathed in air

Originally, the direct translation says his throat risen, but for english readers, it is more common to say that one's chest has risen, so I have chosen to use that expression in place.

*** ore-sama

Ore-sama is an overly self-confident and narcissistic way of saying “me” in Japanese, which idk how to best put in english

T/N: I feel so bad for Guren,,,like he is carrying such a heavy weight upon his shoulders and yet he cannot talk to anyone in the fear that somehow his family might hear about their resurrection I cannot even. And all the soft gureshin moments just kill me ugh (((but you can’t kill a translator that was killed by her school work hahahahaaaa))) btw this isn’t super proof read, so there might be some weird formatting, for that I’m so sorry, I’ll edit it when I’ve gotten more sleep...

ANYWAYS massive shout out to Mhai and bloodyprincess on ko-fi for their most generous donations! I hope you have the most blessed life you can ever have, thank you so much for supporting me in this way ;-; You guys are just wayyy too nice to me, whether is it through coffee donations or just kind words and understanding when I’m behind schedule /ugly sobbing. I’ll stop blabbering here now. On to translating CH2 which is about Shuusaku and Narumi!

<<Prologue 2 || My ko-fi || Chapter 2 Part 1 >>

#owari no seraph #ferid bathory #hiiragi shinya #ichinose guren #ichinose guren's world resurrection at 19 #guren ln #mushroom translates

332 notes · View notes

concertcrack · 3 years

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Mary Jennings & Ali Aslam LIVE at Rockwood Music Hall

Mary Jennings doesn’t shy away from her emotions. She is absolutely vulnerable in her music and equally so when she performs live. She performed in New York City (where she used to live and appear frequently) for the first time in 6 years at the Rockwood Music Hall on July 23rd, where she packed in a crowd of devoted fans who came to hear her share her most impassioned album yet, “Matriarch.” She shared the stage with the talented Ali Aslam, with whom she collaborated on “Hard” and befriended during quarantine through a Zoom open mic she has hosted every Monday since the spring of 2020.

The venue was packed in, people from wall to wall. The wait staff couldn’t even move around. Mary proved to be a popular artist, and no wonder. Her music is honest and her performance is collaborative. It felt like talking to an old friend. I knew her somehow. She was friendly and humorous which made her stage presence all the more inviting. What was most unique was that she made music right in front of us. Like Ed Sheeran does live, she employed a loop pedal that allowed her to be her own band. We watched her creative process; it was like we were all let in on a secret.

She sang six songs from her new album “Matriarch” and didn’t hold anything back. You could feel the passion and rawness in her music which was infectious to the audience. Everybody cried at least once during her performance. She was inspired a lot by COVID and its effects on society and herself. She writes the best music when she feels the most pain and anguish and COVID really brought that out.

It was a privilege to see her perform. When she returns to New York City, I would like to see her again. She has this presence that makes you feel safe and welcome even though you may not know her or her music. She is warm and kind and a beautiful woman all around. We hope she returns soon and will be listening to “Matriarch” on repeat until then.

How did it feel to perform live again? How was this time different, if at all?

To say it felt like magic would be an understatement. I feel so lucky that we’ve had access to livestreaming during this isolation but nothing compares to the energy of performing in person. There was a sea of both old and new faces but everyone felt like family that night. I don’t know that I have ever cried that much on and off stage. It was just awesome. In so many ways it was “just like old times” because Rockwood has become a second home to me over the years, but this felt different because of the longing. I have missed all of these people so much. I have missed playing live shows. I think we all just missed so much over the last year and at least that night we got a lot of it back.

Which song of Ali's was your favorite in this show?

OH my gosh I can’t choose! All of them because they became my soundtrack for the entirety of 2020! To hear them live elevated everything. If I had to choose though, it would be “Hold Me Close.” Not only is it one of my favorites, but Rachel Epp and I got to sing backup vocals with him on this. We have sung backup from our homes (on mute of course) through the Zoom open mic for ages so to get to actually sing with him was pure joy. How I made it through without sobbing is still beyond me.

I understand you have "known" each other a long time and collaborated with an open mic via Zoom all through the pandemic but you had never met until this very special show. (if you BOTH want to collectively answer this that would be GREAT!)

Correct! We had never met in person but had become friends, support systems and advocates for not only each other’s music but for each other in general. Eliza (my 5-year-old-daughter) also feels like she knows Ali from listening to his music, seeing him on the open mic, and just hearing us talk about him around the house. I think without the distractions of life, crowded bars, work, etc, all of us on the Zoom open mics were all able to connect on such a very deep level of friendship that we wouldn’t trade for anything. We became a family without ever meeting in person. The bond that we all built during 2020 created friendships that will last the rest of our lives. Many of the Richmond, VA open mic crew, including one of my besties, Rachel Epp (she was also a bridesmaid in my wedding), drove up to NYC to be there that night. We had a huge showing from all over from that open mic there that night singing back to both me and Ali during our sets. It was incredibly special.

Do you have a song that you always do live? If so, what is it and why

I have been writing and playing music for 20+ years now so it has changed over time haha. I feel like there is always one song off of every album that is the song you always come back to because of it’s relatability, connectivity, and live translation. I think for this album it will be “Hard” or “This Ride.” Both sum up the past year and a half. However, I am still rocking “Home” off of my last album “Metamorphosis” because even with a theme of a zombie apocalypse it still feels SUPER relatable these days.

What goes into preparing this set list? Are there any factors that impacted this one as it was such a special show?

I want to keep the audience engaged from start to finish and have them feel the highs and lows of each song right along with me. Similar to the albums I put out, I want each set list to tell a story and keep a listener captivated from the first song to the last. I don’t want them to think “Oh this is the song where I should go to the bathroom.” I want you to hold it until the end! But in all seriousness, I don’t ever put together a set list with “filler.” I would rather play less time and have all of the songs be super important to the set than just play for the sake of playing. This set was super important to me because not only was it promoting a new album and sharing songs that most people in the room had never heard live before, but it was also welcoming so many (including myself) back into the live music scene after a dumpster fire of a year and half. I wanted everyone to feel in it with me so I put the songs that I felt everyone could connect with the most.

Live music is making a comeback to New York City. After a tumultuous year and a half, we can finally enjoy music in its truest form. On Friday July 23, Ali Aslam made his triumphant return at the Rockwood Music Hall. He shared the stage with Mary Jennings, whom he virtually met in quarantine and physically met that day, in a shared album release performance.

The place was packed, a you-wouldn’t-even-know-we-were-in-a-pandemic packed. But it was beautiful. People came to see the artists they love, and because the audience was so deprived, it was like a reunion. We may not have known everyone there, but it felt like we did. It was joyous, engaging, and empowering.

Ali followed Mary’s set as a 5 piece band. In contrast to Mary’s performance, Ali got you dancing. You could physically feel his music through the floors and his energy. He performed some of the songs to his album The Last American, which is a compilation of songs about his examination of being a Pakistani-American Mulsim and American culture. He sings about the idea that we are responsible for the world and society that we create. You could tell this album means a lot to him from his performance. He sang every lyric and played every note with a purpose. He felt the music with the audience and danced the night away. He was having fun, which, ultimately, is what live music is about.

If you ever get a chance to see him live, do it. His presence is that of an old friend. He’s open about his music and a free spirit on stage, like he was meant to be there. You can listen to The Last American anywhere you get music.

Questions for Ali:

How did it feel to perform live again? How was this time different, if at all?

Joy is the overwhelming emotion. This was a show that we had delayed for months but also one that I had been thinking about for years. The moment you start working on a record you start thinking about the release show, and we poured a lot of precious heart and energy into “The Last American.” It felt really special to perform these songs at long last and do them justice, and also to play the show I’ve been building in my head after so long. There’s this feeling that live music is this sacred thing that we had almost lost, I think everyone can feel it. So the excitement and joy of being able to do that again and have that communal experience with the band and with the audience is that much more special.

Which song of Mary's was your favorite in this show?

I have to say “Hard.” Mary’s songs are so essential for me. They are emotional touchstones. And like so many of her songs, the power of it is in it’s honesty. You can’t run from it. That’s one where I got sing on her record so to see it live and hear so many of those voices that were once isolated and distant across the internet now in the same place at once was really powerful

How did you survive a global catastrophe? My answer when things get hard is always music. I write songs to try and make sense of the grief I feel in the world, but I couldn’t make sense of this one. I was spiraling, like so many of us, putting on a brave face to tell everyone “I am ok.” But on the other end of a zoom call I heard a voice that maybe COULD make sense of it. I got to hear so many of the songs on Mary’s ‘matriarch’ in their earliest forms. Those songs have carried me. This show, and meeting at last is like symbol for me, we’ve made it this far, and we can keep going. But more importantly I’m just so happy to finally meet my friend. “There’s not a word yet, for old friends who’ve just met.”

Do you have a song that you always do live? If so, what is it and why

I do try to have some variety in the set list depending on the occasion, but “Wise Man and the Fool” seems to always find its way on there. It’s kind of a template for what all of my songs are about; this disconnect between who we are and who our communities want us to be. Playing it withthe band it just has so much energy that it’s a reliable movement. It’s an integral part of my story, and I enjoy telling it.

What goes into preparing this set list? Are there any factors that impacted this one as it was such a special show?

I am always trying to build an experience, and have specific moments of tension and release. In this digital era, a live show might the only time someone listens to your music and only your music for and hour, so I want that experience to be more than the sum of its part. For this show, the biggest moment was probably “hold me close.” It was a song written during the darkest days of the pandemic, right when I met Mary online. And now to have her and Rachel Epp standing behind me singing through this moment with me… I can’t describe how magical and moving that was for me…but we built our setlist for that moment and that song so that when we finally played that song together, I think everyone could feel some of that magic.

Find Mary Jennings online:

https://www.maryjennings.com/

https://www.facebook.com/maryjenningsmusic?ref=notif&notif_t=fbpage_admin

http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNJsbS779uIxhkXm4HldkWg

https://twitter.com/jenningsmusic

https://music.apple.com/us/artist/mary-jennings/521359594

Find Ali Aslam online:

https://streetlightshaman.com/

https://www.facebook.com/AliAslamMusic/

https://www.instagram.com/streetlightshaman/

https://twitter.com/StLightShaman

https://open.spotify.com/artist/0nlWIHNriif5fSqDMpEOjo?si=5EnJUb-8SOCfCu9I-Yf1yQ

0 notes

shytiff · 3 years

Text

May Small Wins

1 - lazed, went to racheel’s place and put my motorbike there, went to slipi jaya with silvi devi reza to watch seobok (it was fun!!), had iftar at the yumz green sedayu. It was raining when we get back. prayed maghrib and isya in some random mosque. went back and arrived at like 8 past sumn. showered, slept like a babyy

2 - lazed, slept and woke up at like 11, went to nila’s house, practiced doing eyeliner by borrowing nila's (focallure brand), iftar at green sedayu foodcourt (originally intended to go to the yumz but it enforces actual distancing) with angkot ppl minus tik will. Arrived home at about 9-ish.

3 - magang as usual. Went to rm. Took mrt to lebak bulus. My inaco salary finally came. My head kinda hurts after tarawih. Ended up skimming over bj alex lmaooo. Did not shower today lol,,,,

4 - added dr dafsah's revision to the excel database otw to rsf. Pak nardi took a while to arrive. Left rsf early to go to the bank. I (((finally))) activated m-banking lmaooo wow the features are neat wow im not jahiliah anymore. Found this method of just let it sweat anyway during tarawih lmaoo. Preferably with long sleeves bcs somehow you feel less of the sweaty feel compared to tshirt.

5 - sampling - data entry - RM as usual. Theres no new RM. Read a goood dramione fic by bex chan even if its not complete, its okay. Im okay :"))). Iftar was soup, salad, chicken katsu and french fries. Its been 2 days that i practiced sleeping-to-rain-sound. The first night was spent as a dreamless quick sleep (its over before you knew it), but tonight i dreamed abt almira's wedding lmaoo.

6 - no sampling today!! Still went to rsf tooo go to the mall w regen lmao. Did some data entry. Went to PP by mrt. Went back by going to halte gbk and thankfully the kalideres one arrived after only waiting for 5 mins. Its surprisingly quick, compared to lebak bulus - pesakih trip. Took abt 20 mins to jelambar.

7 - no sampling today too. Dr vera gave us lebaran cookies! Did gcp for bu suryati a5. Went to rm, finally finished the available rm. Went home early. Can finally relax since its the weekend.

8 - literally laid in bed til my body hurts. Rly want to read sumn but dunno what. Finally decided to read momoiro heaven. And rere hello. And after iftar i read lack of love. And just like tht, my saturday was gone. Cant bring myself to do things

9 - its another day of lazying (or self sabotaging, cant tell). Read spy family and its effin hilarious. Wasted my sunday. Cant bring myself to even move and i just laid in bed all day.

10 - last day of work in the weeekend lmao. Felt better than being in AR, but still not that much productivity. Went to RM. Phone call w fianti along the way to plan food in almira's bridal shower. Went back at 12-ish. Picked up my dress from risma busana. Walked to and fro halte kebon jeruk. Prayed zuhur close to ashar in kfc's mushola. Felt better after ~8k steps. Had homelab's green tea mixed with vsoy. It honestly made me feel better. Matcha, or caffeine, sure is amazing. At least i had a sense of normalcy before losing all the will to self-care

11 - consumed internet entertainment u til i was sick and tired of it. Watched a lot of cut videos. Granny came and stayed over. So i slept upstairs

12 - same as 11 but upstairs. More relatives came near iftar time so i excused myself to shower. Slept in mom n dads room at like 12-ish. Watched hp goblet of fire since keisha and karins newest obsession was draco. We squealed together over liking enemies to lovers trope haha,,,,

13 - Somehow all of dad's jakarta relatives came for lebaran. the last time i checked, there were some bridges being burned. prayed eid at home. watched perempuan tanah jahanam (which was surprisingly not scary). ate. napped. talked about personal things w keisha and karin. i cant believe the time has finally come where we talk about this kinda stuff. watched you’re next (it barely has any plot, just gore). they went back at about 8 pm and i just sleptttt yall lmao i didnt shower today. disgusting, i know

14 - cam barely get out of bed. Managed to shower at zuhur time. Watched dalbang and laughed like crazy bcs its just that funny. Read fanfics. Tiktok. Ate once and had greenfield yogurt at the evening. Fell asleep. Woke up at 1 and snacked on 1 pack of oat krunch

15 - run bts. Originally planned to go to flavola but it was still closed, so i went to dm's dunkin. Ordered orange juice and oeanut choco donut but somehow the price wasnt package price hhh. Turns out my clires account was somehow banned. So i contacted the admin. Instead of doing dr dafsah's excel i ended up taking off the makara sticker from my laptop. Bought some stuff for almira's bridal shower. Bought arirang at hari2 (its funny bcs yesterday i was seeing online marketplace, planning to buy it, but turns out hari2 the magical place had buy 2 get +1 deal for arirang.

16 - run bts. Managed to move my body a bit. Did 20 squats (ill elaborate on this later). That improved my mood. Tidied up some of my stuff. Saw the paper bag of random memorabilias by friends.

17 - went to rsf by tj. left kalideres 06:45 and arrived at RSF 8:15. sampling. went to RM (still no new ones). picked up by mom. went to salemba for almira’s bridal shower. originally planned to get padang at citra minang behind BK but it was closed. so we drove around looking for open ones. ended up buying it in a small (but crowded) padang place near a big padang restaurant lmao. was the first one to arrive at acacia. checked in, pulled the bed near the wall. showered. its hilarious sometimes with a bit more serious discussion anjayy. went home w febby who drove and clara

18 - went to mcd to get lunch (since everyone’s fasting) and tried to muster the will to do something. i didnt manage to do anything except shopping online (brought dusty pink hijab at hijup). got spicy chicken and iced coffee. (spoiler alert: tomorrow i got mencret2 lmaooo). read my suha and beyond the skidipapap its actually rly good

19 - went to RSF (with mom as usual. quickly snapped RM pictures while mom was waiting. went with her to mami’s house bcs she and uwak will fly to banjar. finally got to meet haekal, he’s such a smiley babyy its basically free therapy. planned outing with nisa lmao. from soekarno hatta we went to vintage vibes lmao since we’re already out. vintage vibes is more crowded now. and there’s less good findings now. went back emptyhanded. ate chicken arirang since there’s no food. fell asleep at like 06:30 until early morning lmaooo

20 - woke up at 2-ish am, played my phone, fell asleep at like 9?, woke up again at 11 lmaooo. went to sbux. had matcha latte. did some inaco work. todays the most productive ive been this week.

21 - went to gi with febby to also meet up with fi, bought falsies and glue (later proved to be of a horrible quality), siraman and pengajian almira (first time seeing an actual siraman), went to blok m w nes ren ara gen. Tried naruto takoyaki at little tokyo, went to daitokyo (i didnt eat anything), and got matcha cake, sakura and mango raspberry gelato at kebun ide. Picked up by mom. Renata gifted me bts 2021 winter package photocard 🥺🥺

22 - iluni internship webinar by dr naldo. Grabbed fried chicken master. Stupid time management etcetc made my start makeup at 12 (febby went out at 13:30). My falsies and hijabdo was done by herrr thank god for the help. Went to swissbel. Didnt take a pic w almira bcs time. Almiras wedding at damai indah golf pik. My skin was TERRIBLE at the wedding. The make up didnt stick prolly bcs of vitacid. Thank god for masks,,, went back home w febbyy. Made tiktok lmao

23 - lazed. Went to flavola. Its finally daytime caffeine again w kopsuscok. Did dr triya's translation work and finished it at home. She transferred the fee at like 11pm

24 - off to RSF with mom. no new medical records. wrote fuad’s name on the medrec borrowing form. continued to nisa’s place w mom. lazed, played w haekal, put some patient’s phone number on the inaco excel. Off to GBK with nisa and sarah. parked at abc field (shouldve parked near GBK’s H gate). saw moja museum 2.0, took lots of pics. mo paint (moral lesson: draw the background first!! not the foreground). finished at 16:30. ashar at masjid al-bina. nisa dropped me off at gbk tj station. prayed maghrib on the bus since the traffic was so ughh. met atikah in lippo puri. decided to eat seirockya so we walked to puri. talked about a certain someone along the way. we rly talked about it while walking until we arrived at seirockya. atikah treated me uyeyy since she and racheel will stay in depok for 2 weeks starting tomorrow. got the shoyu ramen and gyoza. took the taxi to atikah’s place. mom’s waiting there lmaoo i was like “noo dont wait at jco, just wait at atikah’s”. still felt energized that night in my bed. no sleepy2. like 100% awake.

25 - woke up at like 9:30. i basically did nothing today. didnt even shower lmao (i showered last night). read the good teacher in one go. zoom meeting w dr eva. i rly need some structure in life, goshhh

26 - showered and went to mcd. got nasi uduk, breakfast wrap and milo for 26k (thanks mcd app promo and mcd duta garden’s menu machine, i dont have to interact with another human). planning to do dr dafsah’s excel after all the data is complete, and still no new inaco data, so i ended up.... online shopping at bobobobo....... (bought outer and white culotte). tidied up the writings on my stickies (plenty of words has accumulated). ordered onejai for emir juan (expensive!!! 79k no promo lolll but free delivery. i was baited by gojek’s 1k 2 week subscription and felt like hmmm i should get something since we live in the middle of nowhere and free deliveries felt significant at that particular time when im holding my phone lmao). fell asleep after drinking vsoy + matcha lol its soft caffeine no longer works i guess

27 - woke up late as usual, went to sbux at 1 pm. tried white peach matcha frapp. the peach overpowers and u can barely taste the matcha. tried to read something useful (in medicine) but skimmed 2 ppt and then i saw solid’s bitly for isip. finished reading banana fish. couldnt bawl my eyes out because im outside.

28 - checked out rsf. Still no new ones. Immediately went back. Lazed and wasted my time

29 - iluni webinar. Here comes the impending life crisis. Ate nasi uduk and mie goreng telor today. Tried vsoy golden grain with matcha. It has almond aftertaste. Line call with kris for almost 4 hrs until 11 past sumn pm.

30 - more iluni webinar. Dr Eric, SpPD, PhD was rly cool. Tried daily box (butter soy chicken). Quite tasty. Mkg w regen. Videocalled in the mall w silvi racil bcs its ale and nadaa's wedding today. Bought gooma 500ml matcha w gofood pickup discount. Ate sushi go (the shoyu has mirin btw). 50k+ you get 6 piece of sushi (2 salmon) and matcha cake and ocha. Quite a nice deal. Talked abt cryptocurrency lmao. Went back and forth w TJ. All hail tj

31 - planned to do at least some productive stuff at home. turns out nila is outside and had some time to spare. so we went out. i met her in citra 6. we went to pik’s white beach. its scorching hot since its 2 pm. spent like 15 mins there. we had wanted to stop by monsieur spoon but THERES A QUEUEEE even if its a hot afternoon. so we ate tom sushi at green sedayu. talked a bit afterwards in nila’s place and then i was picked up by emir. tried gooma’s matcha. its not sweet like sbux. approved by mom (who doesnt like sweets). but its more expensive than sbux’s 2L 100k promo lol. (45k after gopay pickup promo for 500 ml). reread bj alex lmaooooo found new tidbits

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