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sekceesimps · 3 years

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Dying Light (a yandere Zhongli x reader oneshot)

summary: Zhongli comes to claim his darling after she fails to fulfill her end of the contract

a/n I wish I could say this was requested but I love this man too much. Writing this one had me feeling some kind of way… Hope you all enjoy and leave some requests (pls do yandere Genshin 🤧 smh)!

Sincerely Coffee

His dark hair shines vividly in the solemn moonlight. Amber eyes radiant, like the purest of diamonds, and fixated right on you. You stand before him and try to subtly shrink away under his piercing gaze. The candles in the room flicker from some gusts of wind coming in. Zhongli seems stiff and at attention, but at the same time far away, lost in thought. Your light and unconscious movement backwards out of fear, unnoticed by you, immediately snapped the archon’s thoughts back to you.

A ghost of a smile begins to dance its way onto his handsome face, a stark difference to the dangerous threats he had whispered into your ear just moments ago. The light gave him an eerie appearance.

“Darling Y/N, I’m afraid that you didn’t uphold your end of the bargain,” he frowned and cocked his head mockingly. You step backwards some more until your back hits the wall of the funeral parlor. He has a predatory gaze now as he steps forward and pins a hand on the surface next to your head. He leans forward to further take in your panic. It brought him distress to see that you weren’t comfortable around him.

“I’m sure you were a good girl and read the fine print. Surely you must be aware that at the end of our contract, if it was that you couldn’t fulfill your end of the deal, then you must join the greatest contract of all time with me?” he continues and runs another hand hand teasingly down your jaw.

“Perhaps you could entertain me and tell me what that greatest contract is?” you ask hesitantly. Beginning to feel the gravity of the situation as you notice the way the archon caresses you and looks at you with eyes filled with a dangerous sort of adoration.

“Oh Y/N, you’ve been bad, I thought you understood everything when you signed. I mean marriage of course,” he answered gleefully, eyes sparkling with affection and excitement at your shocked expression.

Yes, just when did this feeling for you begin, he had pondered to himself. There was no mistaking that these emotions he felt for you were love. He was sure that you also loved him, so why did you look so afraid? He would show you again how perfect the two of you are.

- - -

Zhongli is not one to break his word. He is the archon of contracts after all. When you had approached him, as Rex Lapis, a few months ago he had decided to learn much more about you.

You were an interesting mortal and had almost immediately caught the God’s attention. The geo archon had taken to shying away from the affairs of humans over the last hundred years or two. However he tended to make exceptions for interesting people with even more interesting requests.

“I’d like to ask for some help,” your melodic voice said, breaking the silence in Rex Lapis’s abode. “If that means signing into a contract with you, then I accept,”

He appeared near you in an instant, “Even if that means not getting the best deal?” he asks, startling you slightly.

“Yes,” you breathe out lightly.

“Hmm, you’ve caught my interest,” he responds, putting a hand to his chin, as if he was thinking long and hard about a potential deal with you, “do go on with what you need my help for” he finishes. Of course, he already knew what you needed. He had been watching you for quite a while, but he loved hearing your voice and being near you for once.

“I need to find someone and I can’t do it by myself. Could you please lend me your strength and assistance as I look for this person” you practically begged him. Oh how he wanted to hear your begging in a different context. It was taking everything within him to not tug you by your hair and bring you to his side forever by force. He knew that you probably wouldn’t appreciate that and he still had to do his job and draft a contract. That is when the idea had struck him to skillfully find a way to keep you with him forever.

“Very well, let us start writing up a contract then,” he pronounces with a tone of disinterest, secretly preening with joy on the inside. You perk up and smile largely at him, it brought him satisfaction knowing that he made you feel like that.

“Alright that should be everything,” he finishes and removes his quill from the scroll. “I will come to you whenever you need help, all you must do is call out my name. As for my benefit, all you need to do is find this person you hold dear and that will be enough for me. You have the next 70 days to complete this, of course there will be a punishment if you can’t fulfill your end. However I have the most faith in your skills.” you nod at him in confirmation as you take the pen from him and leave a scrawling signature on the paper. A glowing binding tying you to the archon, prompting you to blush at how close the two of you were now. “Don’t disappoint me, Y/N'' he whispered and let you leave his abode with a smile. The first step in his plan to make you his was finished. Time to wait for your inevitable failure.

Now he wasn’t going to actively make you fail, he still was true to his job and bound himself to you so that you could call him for help. He would still assist you as well. However, he agreed to what you wanted because he knew the task itself was impossible. This brother you were looking for was long gone for sure, he made sure of that before he signed on to your contract. He couldn’t wait for when the two of you would finally be spending the next few weeks together.

Zhongli was smart about the way he conducted himself around you. He was careful not to give you any hints of his true intentions. Sometimes though there would be foolish people who pushed him. Whenever he saw you talking with, brushing arms with, or giving attention to others, the archon would be fuming. Of course, he would let it simmer, playing for the long game instead. It never failed to make him angry and anxious that these insignificant mortals thought they had a change with his future wife, it caused him to let out a tsch in annoyance.

The two of you had wonderful moments in your quest. Your ability to work well together in battle allowed for quick defeats of random hilichurls on the journey. Truly your skills were something he admired and loved about you.

The first night you left a parting goodnight kiss on his cheek was what made him truly believe in life again. Your warm lips against his skin ignited a flame within him that he didn’t know he yearned to have lit. It began to become a sort of tradition between you two for the next months.

His favorite moment with you by far was when the two of you had been drinking and you allowed him to come into your bed. Now, not in THAT way. You didn’t like how he had been sleeping on the ground whenever you spent the night in a tavern so you told him to just sleep in the bed with you. It had been an awkward fit at first due to his taller frame. His long limbs were cramped painfully so you let him wrap his arms carefully around your body. Both of you take in and are intoxicated by the other’s warmth. He could get used to the way you faced him and nuzzled your face into his neck. He had fallen asleep and had the most wonderful rest for the first time in a while.

After the two of you woke up and cuddled in the morning, “Should the day ever come where we are not together, you will continue to shine like gold in my memories” he had smiled and gently taken your hand into his own as he brushed his lips softly against your knuckles. His words and soft actions prompting a light blush across your face.

He didn’t know how much longer he could wait for you. Every moment he was with you, but not truly in the way he desired wound him up more and more. He knew he would snap very soon.

- - -

You tremble against the cold breeze and his warm touch as he leans closer to you and captures your warm lips with his own in a passionate kiss. His hands traveling down further onto your flushed skin.

Now that you were his in an unbreakable bond, he finally felt at ease. With you, Zhongli felt at home for the first time in thousands of years. He would protect you from any and all threats. If it meant keeping you safe with him, then he would tear apart all of Teyvat. After all, you belonged to this archon now.

As the sun begins to rise, you notice the dying light within the parlor, fading candles leaving behind a darker atmosphere. A perfect metaphor you think, if he kept touching you like this then you knew that your own resolve would also die out, completely accepting the ownership that he had over you.

Zhongli notices your wandering gaze before he takes your face between his slender fingers and forces you to look up at him. “Perhaps you’ve forgotten how much you mean to me. Let me remind you,” he announces as he lifts you up and brings you towards his room. Indeed, he would be spending the next few hours reminding you of his love, before you embark on the next chapter of your lives together, courtesy of his subclause turning you into an adeptus in addition to being his wife forever more. He had all the time in the world to get you to comply and love him as dearly as he loves you.

a/n why am I so in love with this man 🧎‍♀️

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #zhongli #zhongli x reader #morax #morax x reader #sfw #yandere #yandere zhongli #yandere zhongli x reader

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nochuvalencia · 3 years

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𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐍𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭? - pjm

⚠️‼️This drabble is short AND LATE AND SLOPPY. So there may be mistakes or wtv. AND THE SMUT ISNT HOT STEAMY SEX LIKE USUAL, ITS SUPER AWKWARD‼️⚠️

𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 :: jimin x reader

𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺 :: When mending a broken friendship, the dark past always comes back to mind, no matter how much one wishes to forget it.

𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦 :: smut, angst

𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 :: 3.3k

𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 :: THE STORY TAKES PLACE WHILE THE READER AND JIMIN ARE IN HIGH SCHOOL, car seggs, unprotected sex, creampie, reader doesn’t orgasm💀, jim finishes super fast, the smut isn’t really for the readers enjoyment because it plays into the plot, virgin!jimin, reader is SUCH a y/n, Jimin is whiny asf, super short bc drabble.

“Remember prom night?”

You stared surprised over at Jimin through the blonde fringe that covered his cute almond shaped eyes as he uttered the sentence you had least expected him to which sent your mind spiraling down the tornado of memories which swirled inside it. He mentioned it, the night you both had wordlessly agreed never to bring up, he actually did it. After three fucking years of moving past it, he tugged it up into the present to invade your mind again. You froze in your seated position on his couch, staring over at the slightly younger male who sat before you, your eyes wide with concern as you set the glass full of wine that was perched in your hand down onto the cream colored coffee table beside you. You and him, your best friend of seven long years, had been sitting comfortably on his sofa reminiscing about past memories over a freshly opened/almost finished bottle of merlot when he chose to do the unthinkable. He brought up the night he silently promised never to talk about again. The night you carelessly robbed him of his innocent pride and stomped on his fragile teenage heart. The night you basically used him then discarded the event like yesterday's paper. The night you finally stopped thinking about a year ago but he never forgot. You stammered, looking down into your lap on which your hands wiggled away nervously like worms. Your mind went blank in an instant, being filled with absolutely nothing but the memory of the night you regret with your conscience .

It was the 30th of May in 2015. Prom night for you and it was already an absolute shitshow. You were crying hysterically into your palms as you sat in the passenger's seat of Jimin’s old 2003 Ford explorer. A crumpled corsage sat in your lap as you wept, black and gold stained tears falling onto the expensive fabric draped over your legs, but you didn’t care. You were heartbroken. Jimin sat awkwardly in the seat beside you debating whether or not he should comfort you because it rarely worked out well for him but against his better judgement, he laid a small, warm hand on your shoulder comfortingly, his eyes widening in surprise when you didn’t immediately try to swing on him.

In high school, you weren’t really one for emotion which is why many questioned your friendship with Jimin because he wore his heart on his sleeve 24/7. No, scratch that, the boy wore his heart on his face like a bullseye. The two of you could not be more different, but you were absolutely inseparable. Everyone at school thought you were a couple but became completely alarmed when you wound up dating the school's hottest linebacker, Kim Namjoon in your Junior year. You remained with Namjoon for almost a year until the night of your senior prom when he dumped you during the slow dance right after he revealed he had been cheating on you with a college girl, which led you to your current predicament. Jimin hated to see you sad, it upset him more than anything in the world so he was already on the verge of tears at the mere sight of you crying, which you quickly noticed after you peered up to be met with his wide tear filled eyes.

“Jimin are you about to cry?” you croaked out, wiping your eyes with the backs of your arms and looking over at him. The corners of your lips twitched up as he nodded, wiping his own eyes with the sleeves of his navy blue tux and sniffling.

“Aw you’re so cute.” you sobbed out happily as more tears poured down your face although, these were happy tears. Laughter filled the small space of the car as he removed his hand from your shoulder, using it to rub his eye and conceal the blush forming on his plump cheeks which you had already noticed. It was no secret Jimin had the fattest crush on you. Everyone knew. He couldn’t hide the loving way he stared at you or the blush that spread on his face when you complimented, or the cute stutter he developed when you teased him. It was adorable and you could admit that he was very cute, but you couldn’t reciprocate any feelings for him. You liked to tell yourself it was because he was a Junior and you were a Senior and the age gap sorta threw you off, but that wasn’t the real reason. In all truth, you yourself didn’t even know the real reason why you couldn’t like him back. You just didn’t feel that way about him. However, you felt bad for leading him on and dragging him along in your never ending friendship but he wouldn’t go away, no matter how mean you were to him. Not that you wanted him to, but you hated to see him sad. Like when guys called you hot and you didn’t push them away, or when you kissed Namjoon in front of him and he was visibly upset, or when you said ‘just kidding’ after every flirty remark or comment shot at him, but he didn’t care. He really just loved basking in the warmth of your presence, and you made him feel less alone in a world of bigger, better kids. He felt secure around you and it was okay if you didn’t feel the same about him.

“I just hate seeing you so unhappy.” his words struck you where it hurt and you stared at him blankly, your mind running rampant with thoughts.

Jimin was the best, he did so much for you. He was the purest, kindest, most gentle soul you had ever met and even though you let him down constantly, he remained by your side and there you were, sitting by a boy who was crying just at the sight of your distress. You didn’t deserve him. You didn’t deserve his generosity, his affection, his friendship, but he gave it all to you anyway, expecting absolutely nothing in return. How did you ever become friends with such an amazing soul. He was an angel. He stared back at you after he finished wiping the tears from his soft porcelain face, his brows raising in confusion at your hypnotized expression as he muttered, “what?” a wide smile spreading on his face. He was so precious. He deserved everything he ever wanted. You wanted to give him the world, but you couldn’t, so you gave him the next best thing and leaned in.

Your lips melded together as his eyes shut, immediately relishing in the feeling of the thing he’d been craving the most for the past three years and it was just as he’d imagined it, absolute heaven. The kiss was a bit rushed if he’d admit but it was more than what he wanted. After a few moments, he opened his eyes softly, just quietly observing the smeared gold shadow on your closed eyelids and the relaxed look on your face. He was loving every moment of what you were giving him and he never wanted it to end, but it had to. It was too good to be true, especially for him. You were thanking him, thanking him for all the things he’s done for you. Thanking him for all his kindness and friendship and he never meant to make you feel like you owed him anything, and you were heartbroken. Your soul was a fresh wound and he knew this was a rebound, a way to fill the newly opened void in your soul which was everything he swore he wouldn’t be. At that moment, he reluctantly took hold of your face in his hands, pulling you back and staring into your watery eyes as he shook his head.

“No, ____, it’s okay you don’t owe me an-.” he started and you cut him off, smashing your lips frantically back onto his as he released a frustrated groan into your mouth. As he moved his hands down to your shoulders, successfully pushing you away once more and staring sternly at your desperate expression as he continued speaking, stammering a bit after the intensity of that last kiss. “Anything, you don’t owe me anything o-okay, and I- I don-” he ran a hand through his ruffled blonde hair with a sigh, stress obviously evident in his features before you placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Jimin, I want to.” you replied, your voice basically a whisper as you stared sincerely at his frazzled frame, a weary smile making its way onto your lips. He was at total war with himself while you squirmed tirelessly in the seat beside him, flinging your shoes off and reaching over to undo his belt. He stared down at your hands with wide eyes as he muttered cautionary phrases, as if trying to convince himself he didn’t want this, which he really did. Jimin was a virgin. The biggest fucking virgin you had ever seen, like he blushed at the sight of a hotdog once. He had fantasized about you taking his virginity, obviously not like this, but he was content with what he was getting, even if he was trying to convince himself that he was not. You dipped your hand into the waistband of his pants and freed his embarrassingly hard dick as he continued to stare at your actions, his breathing picking up in pace and his eyes still wide like saucers. You climbed over the seat as you pushed the poofy fabric of your gold dress to the side and mounted his lap, his member still in hand. He stared up at you wistfully as soft but audible groans fell from his lips, his eyes widening when you glided his tip up and down your accumulating warmth, completely coating it in your slippery juices. That’s when his panic set in. He wanted to make sure you weren’t doing anything you weren’t comfortable with even as you sat on top of his lap quite comfortably.

“____, you don’t owe me anything, I m- I mean if you really want to like I’m totally fine but don’t feel like you have to please I don’t want you to do something you’re not comf- f- fuck.” his voice trailed off as you sunk down on top of him and to your surprise, he whined, letting his forehead fall gently onto your left shoulder. You moaned softly as you sunk down onto him, feeling him stretch you out quite nicer than you’d expected while you snake an arm around his neck for support. All logical thoughts vacated Jimin’s head at that moment as you were wrapped around him, your warmth putting him in a trance he couldn’t quite explain as the two of you sat still, breathing heavily and warming up the small space of the, now warm, car. You decided to move your hips, gyrating them forward while he moaned into your neck, his hands traveling wearily to the small of your back as if scared to roam anywhere else in fear of ruining the friendship even further that the two of you already have. His eyes roll into the back of his head at the newfound euphoric feeling which is all too familiar to you as you are no virgin, quite the opposite actually. His salacious sounds of pleasure spur you on even more as you slowly gyrate your hips into his, your clit brushing his base with every movement but you don’t care whether you feel anything or not because this is for him, not for you, right? You heard his moaning increase in frequency, then you remembered he was a virgin and he couldn’t possibly last this long. His hips began to weakly press up into yours as his breathing became shaky and his head fell back onto the headrest behind him and you finally made eye contact. He was so pretty, his face shone with sweat, plush pillow lips parted, his skin glowed pink. And he made the most salacious, beautiful sounds you had ever heard. You loved how vocal he was.

“____, I- I’m gonna…” he trailed off as his words morphed into a symphony of moans while he stared deeply into your eyes.

“Jimin no, hold it baby. Please not yet.” You shook your head, convincing him to hold it off and slowing the motion of your hips just a bit as he continued thrusting up into you slowly, his hips pausing frequently while he began to tremble softly. He shook his head as his eyebrows furrowed and the pleasure began to completely overtake his body.

“I can’t.” he cried out as he let out a string of loud whines and moans, his orgasm overtaking him completely while his white ropes paint your insides repeatedly. You moan at the feeling and intensity of his orgasm before resting your head on his shoulder tiredly. After a few moments of relaxation, you dismount him, a bit disappointed you didn’t get to cum but happy you made him happy as you stare over at his exhausted frame. His eyes are shut, head tilted back, and lips parted as he breathes heavily through them and you think to yourself. ‘I just used this perfect angel for my own benefit. To rid myself of the shame of being such a sucky friend.’ You used a boy who loves you unconditionally, a boy who would do absolutely anything for you to alleviate your own insecurity. Shame fills every single one of your senses. The guilt runs rampant throughout your body as you sit in silence and stare down at your hands. You overthink more than the overthinker that you think overthinks the most as you fight back the urge to cry. You soiled him, took his innocence, and you didn’t even have the guts to love him back before you did it. It was then you decided, he deserved so much better than you. He deserved someone that was going to treat him like the angel he was. Not you.

For a moment, Jimin thinks things will be different. For a hot minute, he really believes with his entire heart that things will change for the better, that he’s going to open his eyes and you would profess your reciprocation of his undying love for you and he grins as he finally opens his eyes. He smiled tiredly toward you before taking note of your weary expression. It was shame, regret, fear, written all over your face that brought a frown to his own as he realized, you didn’t want him and never would. He was usually okay with that fact but it hit him even harder that night as he stared out of the window and through the trees that blocked his view of civilization. He longed to have you as a lover but knew he would never be able to, but to lose you as a friend as well would bring upon a pain akin to breaking every bone in his body simultaneously. He just couldn’t do it. So he brushed his feelings aside for you for what seemed like the millionth time as he cleared his throat, still staring straight ahead. He couldn’t bear to look at you yet, at least not without bursting into tears and he figured you felt the same as your eyes remained trained to your hands in your lap.

“W-we don’t have to talk about it if you want.” he spoke after what seemed like a millennia of silence, his voice meek and broken. He saw you nod out of the corner of his eyes as the awkward tension in the atmosphere only grew thicker. He didn’t want things to be like this with you and he wished with his entire being that he could undo what just happened if he could have his old ____ back again. “So-” he began as if to start a conversation to alleviate the weird aura but was cut off by your voice. You almost cried at the thought of him trying to mask his pain to make you feel comfortable. You of all people, and you couldn’t watch him do that to himself.

“Can you just take me home Jimin?” you asked, your voice surprisingly normal as he nodded while the car rattled to life. The ride home was silent as the two of you sat, subtly facing away from each other. Not even a goodbye was said once you had reached your house. Well, Jimin tried to say goodbye but you had already jumped out of the car by the time he turned his head to send you off. He just frowned, scrunching his nose and driving off. Unbeknownst to the other, you both cried yourselves to sleep that night at the daunting thought of losing your best friend over a mutual careless mistake.

He didn’t want to leave you, no matter how hurt he felt because he knew, you had just been left by someone else and he wouldn’t do that to you, but you would do that to him. For months after that day, you sent him not one text, never called, never visited over the summer, even after you started your first year of college and left him behind for his senior year. Nothing. But he knew to give you your space, to let you come to him when you were ready, and you did. You texted him a quick ‘congrats’ after he graduated which quickly spurred into a long conversation which turned into an eight hour phone call of just catching up which turned into meeting up with him a few times after he started his first semester of college at the university beside you which turned into a friendship that picked up like it never left off. So that led you here, sitting in Jimin’s living room staring at him as you still have yet to answer his question that echoes in your head. ‘Remember prom night?’ a question so lighthearted in diction yet weighed so heavily on your mind for those silent for minutes of memory. But sadly, as much as you wish it weren’t the truth, you do remember prom night and you finally nod.

“Yeah” you breathed, finally answering his question as you both gazed longingly into eachothers eyes, the unasked and unanswered questions and reasons floating in the air around you while you sat in silence. His wide brown eyes are full of curiosity and hope that you would finally answer the unsaid question that had been plaguing his mind ‘did it ever mean anything?’ but you just couldn’t. The answer sat on the tip of your tongue that was firmly pressed to the roof of your mouth, but you didn’t have the courage to articulate them, not yet. You just stared back, hoping the pleading glint in his eyes would fade and all the remorse would finally leave your body but it didn’t, he still stared. You used him, his body, his mind, his love, his entire being. You used it all for your pleasure, unbeknownst to you at the time because for some twisted reason you thought blatantly playing with his emotions would in turn benefit him. You couldn’t explain why it happened, you could barely say it to yourself, so you remained silent for as long as you could bear before finally deciding to say something. Anything. You opened your mouth, fighting back the tsunami of bottled up feelings that threatened to fly out at any given moment before simply stating.

“Of course I remember, why’d you ask?”

#jimin fanfic #park jimin #JIMIN #jimin x y/n #jimin x reader #jimin smut #oneshot #fanfic #drabble #jimin oneshot #bts smut #bts fanfction #bts fic #bts #bangtan

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hiswordsarekisses · 3 years

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“If anyone comes to me without hating his father, mother, wife, children, brothers, sisters and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.” Luke 14:25 – 33. (New American Bible, Revised Edition).

“Great crowds were traveling with Jesus and He turned and addressed them, ‘If anyone comes to me without hating his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. Which of you wishing to construct a tower dies not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if there is enough for its completion? Otherwise, after laying the foundation and finding himself unable to finish the onlookers should laugh at him and say, ‘This one began to build but did not have the resources to finish.’ Or what king marching into battle would not first sit down and decide whether with ten thousand troops he can successfully oppose another king advancing upon him with twenty thousand troops? But if not, while he is still far away, he will send a delegation to ask for peace terms. In the same way, everyone of you who does not renounce all his possessions cannot be my disciple.’”

Whenever Jesus starts talking about anything but love and mercy, alarm bells start sounding. One day He tells the parable of the Good Samaritan and the next day He’s saying that He came to set the world on fire and how He wishes it was already burning! In this passage, He asks us to hate all the things we are called to love in life. Has He lost His mind. Clearly, this is one of those times when Jesus is thinking as God thinks, not as man does. The “love” that is found in our troubled world cannot begin to compare with the love of God for His people and Our Lord always carries out the will – the love – of God. It cannot be anything else for Him.

But Jesus is not hedging on discipleship; He means what He says. We must renounce the things of the world – even to the point of denying ourselves – if we are to be made worthy of salvation: if we are to be made worthy of eternal life.

When we love God in the way He commands, we are loving our families, and many others beyond them, such as those who are trying to keep us from our heavenly reward.

When we surrender ourselves, renouncing the empty attractions of the world and giving ourselves over entirely to doing the will of the Father, we express the purest and most sincere affection for our loved ones and we begin to see Jesus’ face in everyone we meet. “

“Blessed are they who have concern for the poor. In time of trouble, the Lord will rescue them.” – Psalm 41:1 – 2.

( #repost from Rich Hill)

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lilmajorshawty · 5 years

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Lilith Through The Houses : The Fallen

(Carpenter Brut - TURBO KILLER)

Lilith In The First House : The Demon you can see

Lilith in the first house is about more than just the dark aura or the seemingly endless gazing eyes and petrified reactions from outsiders, rather it’s a accumulation of the natives energy focused so tensely in the area of the “self” that they seem like some powerfully dark entity. the face can have a darkness to it be it in color or in it’s appearance. the hair is often dark and depending on how close to the ascendant Lilith truly is it can even overwhelm any lightening affects of planets like Jupiter or Venus here. the eyes are often stunning, and a very harsh quality lies behind the gaze. the demeanor can seem quite detached and intense even if they are standing in an idle position. the natives also carry a strong energy, one that can seem a bit repugnant or erotic. these natives often can be completely opposite of the energy they’re expressing but it can be so atmospheric that they can be accused of “seducing” or “corrupting” their siblings, co-workers, step parents, friends lovers and so on. They have a mysterious nature to them that creates a sort of fearful nature in others, as many often ponder on if they are secretly moving or plotting in silence. These natives are POWERFUL and the scary aspect about them is their ability to dominate a room, a crowd or any relationship by sheer force of will and by existing. to many they are a threat, a bully, a sharlton, a whore, or some wicked vile beast of temptation. early life can be hard especially if Lilith is afflicted from this house and sadly these natives can receive quite a bit of sexual objectification as people often worship and lust after them as if they were a demon of sexual appetite. Lilith here is dangerous as she projects the inner animal in all of us onto the native making the native a target of primal behavior in others. People can act downright like wild animals towards these natives, snarling, kicking, biting, spitting, roaring, and so on just to strike them down and make them feel as small as the native makes them feel just by existing. once mature these natives are physically astonishing, as Lilith’s dark energy courses through the body’s constitution. staying fit is usually fairly easy here. and the mental and emotional faculties are very highly attuned making them incredible readers of character and intent. as these natives age they walk into their Lithuanian image and become truly intense and immovable objects, the men can seem like the devil, like some sly creature, some harmonious gale that weights you down with a simple glare. The women are fierce, and silent, passionately observing the world like a emperor of their bloodied kingdom. she is dangerous and cold, her intentions are far from emotional and her reactions are everything but sympathetic. this can be the coldest and unnerving of individuals to meet.

(Carpenter Brut - DIVISION RUINE)

Lilith In The Second House : The Blackest of Sheep

For Lilith in The second house natives self worth can be a guessing game, sort of like a constant pendulum swing. hatred of the purest and most carnal form can be exhibited towards ones body, whilst at another moment worship and unforeseen pleasure and joy can be derived from ones own body, their sense of self and place in this grand shit show called life. as you can imagine their appetite for the finer things is unmatched, but in many cases these natives love the ruined parts of beauty. This can be the ripped jeans, the broken stilettos. the old and cracked rusty crimson lipstick or the runny eyeliner, the spiked belt or the bareness of skin pale and lifeless after a cold shower. These natives are cold to the touch and tend to have quite the intense relationship with intimacy and touch. in many ways they loathe closeness and lingering intimacy, seeking to keep a mighty far distance from close ties or entanglements that last longer than they should. the other side of this is that once they do let someone in they can be so drawn to touch and sexuality, its sensuous and amorous nature that they become a gluttonous demon for it, eating their lovers alive. they can wear plenty of silly pretend tones, and soothe anyone into a manipulative tactic and make it seem like it was all a misunderstanding. These are the robbers and thieves willing to take and bleed everything and anyone dry if it brings them closer to their obsession “having what they cannot.” These natives are magnetic and their earthy bare beauty lies in the fact that Lilith here is reflecting on her time with Adam, the sex they had, his touch and the stranious and rather euphoric state she enjoyed until she was cast out and betrayed, thus as she lay nude and bare flying in rage in an unknown sky she dammed the world, the world she believed she had once had, now telling her she could no longer own it. these natives don’t value money or materialistic objects rather they value what is not their’s, what has been created, what is so fondly gazed upon by others, they seek to tear down it’s beautiful glow and to in-turn be made beautiful in it’s downfall. These natives by nature are sacrificial and have a almost godly relationship with the plants of the earth, many are gardeners in their pare time or actively partaking in medicinal herbs and many are even inherently nomadic easily reading climate patterns and environmental signs. these natives are also amazing in the field of medicine for their ability to scope out bodily dysfunctions and emotional imbalances. that being said these natives also have the most dangerous singing voices one could ever here do to it’s magnetic and often eerily moving tone. a rejection of the sensuality or body is common with this placement by the self or by others.

(Carpenter Brut - MANIAC cover)

Lilith In The Third House : The Rumors Of Shepard

Lilith in the third is a very subtle yet remorseless position, here Lilith has a free tongue and is delighted at the intricate yet magnified level of mental mind games and manipulation plausible in human nature. These natives may have had a parent or an early influence who was a pathological liar, a schemer or in some ways a com, and false prophet. the children often were fascinated and found novelty in the weakness of the brain and sought later in life to play into this more weakened aspect. Lilith sees weakness in the expression of sympathy and compassion and often preys into these aspects via communication or even things as subtle as certain movements/mannerisms, speech patterns and eye movements to throw off their desired target. Sometimes the lies are harmless while other times they are dangerous and toxic although none of this really matters to the native. These natives aren’t heartless per say but their is an inherent disconnect in the manner that the mind and the heart interact; they don’t. you see Lilith places an almost tar like cable separating the two so she can have her fun, as emotions would interrupt her spiritual mingle so to speak. These natives enjoy vocal banter and sparring as they get to test out their new tactics(subtly of course) on others and test the efficiency. These natives are brilliant writers and can often easily decorate a paper with words and diction that would make a literary scholar and professor of 99 years drop to his knees in astonishment and awe. they can color their words in such a way that can both woo you and terrify you with it’s effect. Many with this placement have seductive voices and can easily charm your clothes off in such a way you could even feel taken advantage of. both sexes are dangerous in this regard because although they can create a pretty little portrait for you, they are secretly knitting you in their twisted and often thoroughly planned web. these natives aren’t plutonion the sense that they actively seek to control their conversations or interactions, rather they do so in such a quiet and sincerely relaxed way that it’s as if it’s instinct to naturally swirl a mass into a a joyed get together, a fight into a compliment fest, or a tragedy into a miracle. They are intellectually 100 steps and 100 lifetimes ahead of you which is what makes being in their presence such a sincerely scary thing as they tend to be alphas in any interaction with everyone around them taking the place of common folk, in the presence of a lord. A rejection of ones thoughts and ideas and even knowledge by the world is common. the arms tend to either be hairless or sporting some dark moles, and scars here and there that seemingly seem to curve into a moon like shape. Lilith working positive here awakens premonition and cerebral awareness that far exceeds the normal person.

(New Order - Elegia)

Lilith In The Fourth House : The Nomadic Evil

Two things should be mentioned be for we carry on, This is Lilith And what we are speaking on is how her presence can effect that particular area of your life by infusing it with her darker scheme but make no mistake where she lay is often the area of life that needs her power the most as to protect the native from being dogmatically bulldozed over by the treachery of the world, she is both a blessing and a great evil. In the case of the fourth house Lilith can make the home life practically non-existent. It can create detachment or loose ties with ones heritage or familial upbringing. In both men and women this aspect can show that the families history is often dark and full of lose of power and regaining of it in darker ways through sexual and emotional expression and this can involve much of the female side of the family. their can be an innate disdain for other women or MEN especially with this but it’s more common to have a disdain for the conventional Mother and Father dynamic if anything. This can make the native feel rejected when home, or as if they don’t really belong, or in some cases like home is not a real conceptual desire. the family itself can seem almost alienated and far, and much of the early interactions may have been tense, overwhelming or the women in the family could've been survivors of dark acts such as rape, murder, abuse, violence, and or anything that would’ve likely been the result of a man or society failing to give them aid. When Lilith rest here positively the above is still true but the connection to the divine feminine and women in general is passionate and endearing and instills a lot of inner will power and drive in the native. the chest can be very boney and rather tight with the way the nerves and organs coil together. so sharp chest pain, and chest compression is common due to anxiety or strong emotions. the heart can also suffer from palpation and sloppy rhythm yet miraculously the heart is in amazing condition and seems to do well enough on it’s own to fix any potentially fatal issues(still go to the doctor if any symptoms get worse though!) the native tends to express emotions in a cold and rather aloof manner and can have a very hard time flowing into their more nurturing qualities mainly because they were never really exposed to nurturing in the same sense most people are, they attribute caring and compassion to being sturdy, independent and steadfast anything other than that is useless and unnecessary. overly emotional or overly clingy types and unfortunately even children can be a very hard battle for these natives as it clashes with their essence. these natives despise intimacy and tend to prefer being alone as opposed to having to connect and get intimate with others. that being said these natives are emotional, and deeply so but this is hidden behind a wall of trauma and a very well created mask. the thing is though the mask isn’t to protect them or anything rather it’s an instinctual action to create distance and to raise themselves above those who would try to dig past their facade. They are rather powerful in nature and have almost demonic/fallen angel like emotions, often feeling wrath rather than rage, feeling pride instead of courage and feeling lust instead of love, these natives emotionally exist on a darker emotional plane than anyone would ever be able to fathom. They are by no means fiction and i tell you this because these natives are genuinely so hard to understand, like a complex myriad of fluttered wings and bloodshed, navigating their pain, and their hardships is nearly impossible and this only worsens the older they get as they periodically build more and more mazes. the mind set is often attentive but far away, they can seem like passerby’s and have a extremely closed of nature making things such as friends or lovers seem a bit difficult. they are caring but rarely ever feel as if anyone is worth the expression, they are warm, but very rarely are they willing to create a sun. these natives are mysterious but not for the “look” of it, mainly because they live in their darkness so much so that it is who they are, and if anything thats the beauty of this placement they are an innocent angel with the whitest glowing wings dancing in the dark all alone, in peace far away from the commitments of the world.

(Big Black Delta - Huggin & Kissin )

Lilith In The Fifth House : The Volcanic sin

Lilith in this house is a vortex of madness, she swarms and dances in the highways and the swamps, in search of god. She’s so angry and filled like a wine glass with sorrow and lament shouting endlessly for him to hear her pleads. She’s grieving constantly, for what seems never ending. always, constantly in pain, constantly burning her wings and re-birthing over and over each time becoming something else, something more, something darker than before. These natives are seemingly passive and bothered by the world around them, critiques of art, disgusted by the things humans passionately wave their fist in the air for, they always seem disappointed or lacking in amusement at the creations of man. these natives can brim with an almost colony of souls the moment they see that desired star power, that human pitfall where all seems lost and someone surpasses their own abilities and broken bones, and armless and all rises even still. these natives value fearlessness in the face of ones own demise and destruction, rising above adversary without wasting a moment to dwell in the sadness of the situation, art littered in pain or trauma and it’s massive weight or the intensity of someone being able to vocalize that pain and it’s darkening wave excites them. they adore man at it’s weakest moments and the fight it takes to come above those heavy waters once more. These natives can be almost demonically cold to weakness in others, turning a blind eye to someone crying or complaints of a hard life, they tend to ice out people with sob stories and even more so they tend to find complete disgust at those who sell their sob story to the masses and are worshiped for their own self pity. these natives are true seekers of sorrow and strength and it’s often why Lilith in this position is almost at the same strength as the Descendant in deciding whom these natives marry. The lover often is a cold one, dark, intense and one whom has witnessed their fair share of sorrows hence their more stoic and serious nature. the love life of these natives can be pure hell, as the romantic partners especially when younger may be attracted and even obsessed with the natives but upon the natives seeking to consummate or initiate the bond past the courting stage the lover can reject the native, coldly as if they were dirt and openly choose another, or avoid the native all together and in some extreme cases the lover could be abusive or monstrous all due to the fear and powerful emotions the native drudges up in the lover. much pain will be felt but many re-births will be the result, the natives get far more cold, far more intense and even more selective as they age. much of the rejection is due to the native unconsciously turning a blind eye to what Lilith is trying to show them within themselves. Lilith seeks to help these natives process their own pain, and to love from within rather than seek it through another person which is often why up until that is learned these natives are given nothing but hate, mis-treatment, and sorrow. The relationship with children can be healing surprisingly, Children often are afraid of these natives (at first) but as time progresses and these natives get older and harness their inner love children naturally gravitate towards them, seeing them as a source of fun and excitement, children are often very protective and fond of Lilith in the fifth house natives often showering them with love and support. the deeper alignment here is that the natives are constantly carrying an energy of sadness and are often disconnected with the world around them due to their incredibly high standards of what counts as passion, they don’t just want love they want to feel it like a raging fire in their souls until it leaves nothing but ash. they want to feel sadness like a suffocating and deafening tsunami on a deadly storm in the sea. they want to love heir children with the force of all mother united, to feel sex like a turbulent storm of water and fire crashing into the earth like molten rock and icy cool. Sexually keeping up with these natives is impossible, they move like a wrathful archangel and can be practically insatiable. Often times these natives tend to find their suitable lover sometimes between their early 20′s or mid 30′s in most cases it’s early 20′s during college or ladder adolescence as the sun is progressed into the incoming sign and its often mid 30′s following the Saturn return due to the fact that these two will be in a close interaction. the back can have moles, beauty marks or freckles or even just sport a few scars and a more darker skin tone than the rest of the body. the Body of these natives is AMAZING. these natives can seem to have model figures or have very naturally erotic bodies that can make even the most innocent person look like a sultry, she- witch the second the clothes come off. Dancing and writing tend to be past times for these natives and they can be some of the most erotic, and talented dances you could ever have the blessing of seeing. Singing and physical activities are also past times and these natives are very obsessed with the body and tend to gravitate towards more physical and martial art like sports, due to their inherent flexibility and natural stamina and vitality. the overall health is deviously good and these natives tend to have impeccable recovering abilities often mentally dealing with sicknesses. These natives can seem like they are constantly bored or unamused which can make them seem intimidating or hard to please which is often why people feel so uncomfortable or as if they must be on their best behavior around them, this includes people above them and children. many people may seem stiff or cautious around these natives due to how stoic and carnal their eyes can seem in disapproval. these natives internally feel a endless state of heartbreak and can suffer from drastic bouts of depression to episodes of euphoric highs only to come crashing down with the speed of a collapsing wave. things don’t necessarily improve rather these natives learn to take these up and down pitfalls and rise and even stronger version, a darker one than before.These natives are not easy to connect to and can be very hard to gain the time of but assuming you have what it takes they are extremely loyal and deeply sown to the ones they give their hearts too. Be careful how or what you say or do to their family, husband or kids they will annihilate you with the scorn of a trillion dead and their are no lengths they fear crossing.

(New Order - Blue Monday)

Lilith In The Sixth House : The Burning Lambs

This Position of Lilith can seem like a backdoor or a darkened curtain off to the side in the natives personality. They can demand an almost unrealistic and un-sympathetic tone to the less then polished things in the world around them. These natives crave perfection and this isn’t something that’s a simple as the clean room, and perfectly tucked shirt, or carefully honed smile, these natives need and desire perfection at it’s core in a almost spotless representation of themselves to the point of which they would rather annihilate all around them that fails to meet this high expectation. these natives condemn the more instinctual sides of man, preferring to use the mind as their highest calling. many find it difficult to work with others, preferring not only to go in alone but they enjoy the weight of taking on a duty even if it leaves them in shambles. These natives have a furious tenacity that makes them bloodthirsty for positions at work, and trying to compete with them will be a fruitless effort as much of their being and dark intellect come into the matter. in many ways they are beautiful, innocent and contrasting as much of their allure lay in their seemingly angelic and pure nature. these natives have a strong level of discipline and self restriction only second to their Lilith in Capricorn and 10th house brethren. These natives can have billions of fires and storms raging within yet present the polished car, sleek black dress and rose-marry scented smile in the phase of an entire gathering as if they weren’t impaled in the deepest of depressions moments before. a certain level of seriousness and intensity cloud these natives as more often then not they make it a point to remain objective, detached and eerily focused on the objective at hand. ignorance is blasphemy to the natives and often a source of immediate disapproval and disgusts. These natives are very intolerant of many things especially those whom are overly dependent on instinct rather than logic. These natives are incredibly sensual and pleasures can be multi-faced much like their minds. they tend to be their most sexually powerful in sexual situations of inequality. They may prefer more dominant or submissive sexual partners and have a strong need for their darkness to be expressed through sex on a constant basis otherwise frustration and mental agitation is the result. the problem here is that this can cause the underdeveloped types to get into relationships mainly for the sexual outlet rather than the emotional growth. They are immensely loyal, but very rarely ever do they commit to someone as many prefer to be alone. the masturbating tends to be aggressive and volcanic in nature and often times these natives have such an earthy and tense sexuality their co-workers and even people in their everyday lives may feel uncomfortable or sexually aroused around the person due to the power of projection. The stomach can have scars, or moles upon it in some cases or may be the source of frequent emotional upsets. the health can fluctuate and reach moments of life or death both figuratively and in reality. feeling reborn after fighting a illness is common even if it’s something as small as a cold. the animals that the native deals with can be Lilithian in nature and have darker more dangerous attributes. the animals will have powerful personalities and will be treated as an equal by the Lilith person. Hunting animals for sport or having a more grudgingly relationship with animals is common here. These natives are incredibly resilient and steady but have a very inner ward pestilence that causes them to despise reliance or support of any kind.

(Hozier - Dinner & Diatribes )

Lilith In The Seventh House : The God In we, The Devil In Me

This position of all Lilith in the Houses is One of the most paradoxical and the most devastating. These natives are like a violent wheel of chance, filled with endless possibilities of both malefic and benevolent inclination. These natives can be the sweetest drop of honey, the warmest embrace and the lover of your fantasies dressed as human. They can be your wickedest nightmare, deepest wound and most prolific demon inhabiting your body and mind. They have a level of control on their environment that would put Scorpio to shame, a level of cunning that would silence Virgo and Gemini and an almost biblical like understanding of the human brain and it’s reactions, it’s fears, it’s pitfalls, and it’s quiet longings in such a way that Sagittarius and Capricorn would fall prey. the manipulation can be quiet and a bit hidden in it’s expression but it happens, sometimes unconsciously, other times in the light of day. these natives no matter how lighthearted their chart or how many grand trines and castle of Davids will have a very unbalanced inner world, fluctuating from nun to sinner. to many outsiders these natives are adorably understanding and patient, arguably the most giving and sacrificing person you’d ever meet but behind the sweetness these natives are deeply self invested and in many ways this isn’t a bad thing but it’s also a means of self preservation at the expense of others. These natives seem closer and more intimate then they actually intend and are one of the most difficult people to get to open up or trust you as they prefer to keep much of their interactions superficial and easy. Deeper connections are usually saved for potential love interest or marriage partners but they more than most people get to meet an entirely different beast. these natives can attract heavily Lilith aspected lovers whom are dark, tantric, intense and downright possessive and sexually demanding like hungry animals. The native themselves can project their own shadow side onto the people they interact with platonically or romantically which can create a hypocritical “why are you acting like that” mentality when the truth is that they themselves are the source of the heavy seated Lilith energy. This house is most dangerous as the natives tend to get that much more intense and dark when married, expressing their “real” self, the sinner, Persephone, the black witch, the fallen angel free of shackled purity. They can end up with marriage partners or lovers who seem completely opposite of them or rather a complete 360. the lover may have tattoos, work in a taboo field of work or the music industry funeral homes, a rock-star/musician, porn,martial arts, or drug trafficking and money laundering, running a prostitution rink, selling drugs, or things like hunting, poaching, lucrative work, government work, FBI, Military and so on. The partner is often serious and Intense but LOYAL. The native can be co-dependent and attract co-dependent relationships which are more dangerous here because of the Lilith like theme. The natives can be seductive and so sexually provocative that many people who may not even be that sexual are actively aroused or turned on by the Lilith in the 7th person, often caught up in their sultry atmosphere to the point where many may be in fear, or disdain of the natives effect on them. The other lot, married, committed or otherwise who cannot help themselves develop strong obsessions with these natives. Love is death for these natives and it needs to be littered with obsession, paranoia, possession, hate, love, intensity, pain, loss, rebirth and struggle for them to truly value it, although they may intentionally reject this and seek more peaceful unions, deep down in their heart of hearts they need that chaos to mend the woes and trios of faces and inhibitions tied to love and romance for them. The buttocks and back can be incredible. the natives may have birthmarks on the butt or darker skin on the area, men may have a hairy buttocks while both sexes may have a mole or scar of some sort here. the waist and hips flow like water and can make these natives excellent at riding or rather make cowgirl-reverse-cowgirl positions their favorites. these natives are dangerously seductive and can set a whole room of men and women in under their spell as this is a gender less sexuality expressed here often sucking up any unlucky fool who dares to gaze their way. the tell tale of these natives is their deep stare, it can feel like god is looking upon you, as if the devil is entrancing you, they seem like a taboo decision that will change your life and leave it in tethers.

( Allan Rayman - Crush)

Lilith In The Eighth House : The Way we speak to the fallen

Lilith is happy here, she resonates with Hades and Pluto, she understands their loss and contempt, their lament and dutiful weight. These natives can seem magnetic without much effort. much of their movement and reaction is stalled and cautious, yet never in a way that brings to much attention to them or their actions. They are observant and still much like a spider knitting it’s web and patiently waiting for that one impulsive mistake or haphazardly movement. They are cunning researchers of human nature, often playing fortuneteller when it comes to mingling with others. Their sexuality can feel like a heavy wave devouring you in a atmospheric way. they can be around you, next to you and above you all in one instant without moving an inch. Their personality is deep but mysterious as much of their real feelings and sexual desires are hidden behind screen doors and cleverly manipulated traps set to seduce or adhere those around them. These natives prefer the -nonchalant and rather un-bothered mode of emotional expression as much of their darker or more wild nature is focused and centered only on sex.Lilith here grants these natives the ability to use their darker more traumatic experiences as an battery for their rebirth. The worst in life slides of these natives like tar and from the tar rises a new silky smooth pair of wings with an even tougher exo-skeleton. the ability to heal the pain in themselves and in others is one of their best qualities as they are strongly sympathetic and patient with the darkness and pain in others. Lilith in the 8th house more than most people are deeply aware how trauma and pain can make us lash out or self destruct as a means of regaining control and as a result these natives are the least reactive to emotional displays or darker manipulation or coercive tactics by others. In all honesty these natives feel pity for such people and do what they can to rise above them. These natives aren’t as manipulative or as power hungry as Lilith in Scorpio and tend to prefer love unions built on respect and equality, they just prefer to have control in the bedroom, but have a very open and ardent nature to the sexual ventures in general. sex is VERY important to these natives but they don’t mind waiting years or decades if it means they could find the right person who satisfies their inner sexual need of being respected and recognized as a sexual being and “loved” for it. Here we see Lilith desire to be seen and recognized for her sexuality rather than cast out for her pride in it. these natives are very sensitive towards sexual partners and tend to have deep marriages as they work very hard to maintain the sexual chemistry and love in the union all the while force-ably putting the relationship through upheavals and moments of spiritual and emotional rebirth. These natives are mainly gifted with matters of inheritance and joint business dealings but can still attract money in rather taboo or off the script like fashions. The sexual partner may be the only person these natives share their money or savings with and the family may come second or not at all depending on the relationship with the mother. Many outsiders can be obsessed with the energy of these natives often acting like fan-girls/boys at the acknowledgement of the native which typically puts them off and rather disgust them. These natives fall for the unassuming or the lighthearted free spirits who see the light in everything. the ones with Lilith towards the end of this house prefer more stoic and intense lovers. The genitalia is FIRE! quite literally, men and women with this position have sexual organs that can bring the crazy out of a mountain. They can be very passionate and deep sexually, and will be one of the most biblical experiences you’ve ever had.

( Das Rocs - Maybe, I)

Lilith in The Ninth House : The God You Did Not Believe In

Lilith in the 9th is as massive as the solar system, seeking to spread her wings over all the neatly tucked books, and scriptures, digging her nails in the spoken word and rearranging it’s tones and vibrations to her sense of grandeur. Lilith here is the grand passion and the mighty mind of man. she sees fun and joy in the merriment of dancing in the knowledge and origin of the world and very rarely will you ever catch these natives poorly informed about any subject matter as they do much work to ensure that they know the where,why, how and when of the worlds history. They can seem arrogant or entranced in their own knowledge to the point of stepping on the ideas and thoughts of others. They can have an air of supremacy and carry an air of resistance or loathing of universities or higher schooling in general deeming it as a barrier to delving deeper into knowledge. others tend to dive head first into higher schooling to an almost obsessive quality, treating it like some insatiable candy they cannot get enough of, often returning to get multiple certifications and degrees just because they know they can. these natives have a strong dislike of strings attached or chains of obligations which makes them very unreliable and rather arms length in many of their interactions. to them sex and romance, life and death, love and hate should be experienced like an expansive adventure, a gift from the demons gods of hell to live as you please and grow beyond measure. The emotions can fly UP and DOWN, HERE and THERE but they are never consistent as these natives are always heading to the next spiritual obsession. Lilith here is free, SO endlessly free and she hates being all cooped up in a boring, stagnate environment which is often why these natives can seem like birds, and many share a strong understanding or compassion of winged creatures. The thighs can be darker than other parts of the body, have scars or moles or in many cases the thighs are often plump and thick depending on how deep Lilith sits in this house. the sexual arousal can be VERY fast for these natives, especially the men. they are turned on by the uncharted and many men with this placement love sex so much that they fuck men and women, anyone that has that sexy air of inhibition is everything they’ve been begging for. the foreign travels can be to darker lands, and might involve danger, death or turbulence of some kind so its advised to be safe, and very aware of yourself and others when ever you head out of the country. Lilith is VERY bubbly here so it’s no surprise that this Lilith is one of the hardest to spot.

(New Order - Vanishing Point)

Lilith In The Tenth House : The Suited Black Paint

Lilith here is operating in the cold black visor, the feathers loose and sparingly dancing cross the corporate office like jet black paint. These natives can Seem like a cold shower, or some devastatingly subtle but violent train crash with a almost quiet disharmonious backdrop. The ambitious nature of these natives is their strong suite but also one of their most dangerous past times. these natives seek the top and can often use their black wings to blow away the competition, sometimes through charm, manipulation, scandals, black- mail, sexual liaisons or downright intimidation. These natives prefer to be in charge and don’t stay in the passenger seat of any corporation, business, activity for very long as their natural desire to sit on top triumphs above all else. Their careers can be of Lilith like nature or just be drenched in Lilith like themes, such as sexual objectification which is especially the case with women or, emotional black-mail, power plays and power trips or downright psycho-analytics. These natives are often seen as a threat by their colleagues and in true Lilith story line fashion the workers can act as god and attempt to cats him or her out of the workplace, in some ways out of fear and in others out of jealousy. Many times over the bosses or corporate peers can be perverted, dubious and false in their intent. The natives tend to have a ridiculously thick skin and easily create emotional block aids and emotional barriers as a means of alienating their issues and problems as opposes to facing them. this is not done out of a fear of what they feel, rather to them the time necessary to deal with their emotional issues is time that could be used getting ahead. these natives can be filthy in the means that they go about rising in the ranks and can be even more cold and aloof to lovers whom fail to showcase ambition or a grounded and realistic outlook on their future. These aren’t the types to marry dreamers or people who spend more time talking about their future than creating it. These natives bare Lilith disdain for the lord and because of this they tend not to place things in the hand of chance or prayer, rather they believe in actively going out to create the destiny and circumstance they desire. These natives often have a hard relationship with the father or one that is strained in some way, this can even be a step father or male relative of some kind. their is an inability to submit to the darker expression of their sexuality emotionally rather, they remain objective and steady sexually even when it’s something that should be expressed in a relaxed and calm way. Due to this their sexuality can be very BDSM and Power play friendly, they like to feel in control or be completely controlled by their sexual partners and this can sometimes be in such a way that the natives need to feel emasculated or pain in order to feel ‘alive” though this behavior is only in extreme versions. Much of the darker energy of Lilith is projected towards racing to the top, a insurmountable hill that never seems to end. these natives don’t realize that Lilith is trying to overcompensate for her perceived short comings and is on an endless tirade to prove(god) of her worthiness and power but in reflection to the natives this symbolizes a inner feeling of being inadequate or lacking in worth via their environment and their familial upbringing that is to be addressed before the native becomes engulfed in Lilith Dogma. these natives are as harsh as granite and can often struggle with the softer expression of sex and intimacy as they naturally detach and shut down emotionally from these things out of an instinctual need. That said the relationship with the children unlike their fourth house counterpart is not nearly as strained and is actually very close knit and loving. These natives give their children the world almost to compensate for what the native lacked as they themselves grew up. the kids come first in their lives, before the marriage partner and this can often cause a ripple in their marriages and one they don’t typically care to fix. these natives tend to have sharp peaks and ridges in the bone and can have rather great bone structure. under eye bags or just tightly clenched resting faces is common, beautiful smiles but these natives usually try not to smile in public.

(New Order - Leave Me Alone)

Lilith In The Eleventh House : The Millions of Lost Souls

Lilith here is Many but also few. Here Lilith understands the human psyche, she understands its’s pains because she understand the worlds pain, she sees it’s cycle. These natives are Em-paths and have a very difficult time separating their woes from the woes of others. These natives can feel the emotions of others in such an intense way that it often feels like a shock or jolt that can energize or deplete them. These natives have a keen ability of harmonizing with whatever environment you place them in but can also create chaos there by crowding up the energies. Lilith here is like a battery constantly debilitating and then re-vitalizing the area around her postivley or negativity afflicting her environment. These natives tend to attract Lilith like friends whom are often, serious, sultry, provocative, reckless, anarchist, aggressive, shady, mysterious or downright evil. These natives are not naive, and tend to be very aware of their energy and how it manifest as a great many with this placement take on a very nomadic and free spirit. Many like to wear chakra stones, and jewelry that furthers their individualistic expression. The ankles and calves of the native tend to be darker then the rest of the body or remarkably sturdy. they may still have scars or just a abnormality to them. These natives make excellent runners and many gravitate towards the sport whilst others may pick up singing or artistic expression. Lilith here is more passive than she is a troublemaker, choosing more so to lay low and experiment with her own individual self then that of others. these natives can express themselves in ways that can turn society upside down, or greatly challenge the status quo. Gender normalties are lost on these natives as they don’t really identify themselves as anything in particular, rather they are energy, constantly shifting through the cosmos. These natives have a sharp tongue that can quickly turn poisonous yet they don’t actively rely on it. Due to Lilith being so self invested in this house very rarely will the dark side of this native produce any dangerous or malefic habits, rather they will seem calm and vulnerable to the world around them. sexually they can be very quirky and new-ons. they see intimacy as a gate way to exploring their raw and darker angel and transverse sexuality in stride. that being said these natives are very odd and perplexing in matters of romance and sex and can easily fly back and forth between wants and needs sexually as Lilith is really just testing the waters. the mind is deep but depressive and these natives can suffer mighty highs and strange lows from nowhere but never anything that debilitates them. these natives are very kind and balance self centered and people centered quite naturally through the help of Lilith.

(New Order - Guilty Partner)

Lilith In The Twelfth House : The Clouds where she Scram A Mighty Scream

Lilith in this house is chaos, the reasoning being that Lilith in this house is grappling with the idea of undoing and self manifested characterization. Lilith doesn’t face her actions she seeks to free herself from them and in karmic fashion the evil in her is sent spiraling back at her. These natives are sensual, calm, intimate, healing, clairvoyant, em-paths, spiritualist, pacifist, slaves of justice and human weakness yet they also manifest as unstable, counter-productive, stagnate, false, and stuck in their escapism. These natives are so afraid of themselves that it becomes an unconscious struggle between their Lilith and them as a person. this aspect plays out like a Demonic possession. The person can feel entangled, low energy, or bouts of hedonism, sexual obscurity, impulsive action, and substance abuse that are all out of character. The thing here is that Lilith in her attempt to commit a grand escape has a chain caught on the native causing her woes and anguishes to be randomly transferred to the native. in many ways this can create an alter ego for the native as the native gets hit with personality shifts that progressively deepen as they get older. the dreams can be very LILITH like and the mind itself and it’s inner psyche can feel like hovering voices, paranoia and dreams of sharing or not being in control of ones on desires and feelings or even actions. This aspect can create a person who can seem moody and unpredictable, especially when the urge to detach and disengage pops in, it can be impossible to stop these natives. the sexuality falls on a spectrum like with all humans but with Lilith's inhabitants their can be an unconscious desire to stay celibate or an association of trauma with sex. Men and women here could've been sexually abused or taken advantage of and their can be issues surrounding the “yes” or “no, i don’t want to” in sex that can make it a very blurred area for the native. Lilith may want aggression, passion and complete domination but the person may not truly resonate or desire that and may feel appalled or fear if the personalities switch during sex. these natives NEED a sensitive and compassionate lover who will guide them and nurture them, lovers who are chosen during the Lilith persona tend to worsen and deepen the wounds of this person causing a higher frequency of escapism. I CANNOT stress enough that parents who have kids with this placement, please ensure your child is well aware of the dangers of sex and try to keep them somewhat grounded in the area as some of the emotional trauma can start very early and these natives do sadly attract the worse of the worse mainly due to how violent and angry Lilith is to be resting in this house. the natives can be seductive but its never intended, they can be provocative but it’s never something they are aware of. these natives are a mirror of the person who views them and can be a dream or nightmare but that is the power of Lilith here, even in her escape she creates a shadow in the clouds that can be anything the heart fears or wishes. these natives can sleep for LONG hours and have a hard time waking up. The nightmares tend to be hard for them to awake from and can make the natives fear going to sleep all together. Insomnia is another manifestation later in life but is not the norm. the brain is powerful but repressed. the natives can be highly sensitive to hospitals or jails and usually attributes jails to danger and naturally stay away from them and out of trouble. these natives have a natural distrust of hospitals and vice versa as in many cases things go array or seem shadier than they should. that being said later in life hospitals are crucial for the native and therapy in it’s own way is very healing for the native. the desire to use sex as a coping mechanism is a dangerous possibility here and one that should be avoided at all costs. these natives are lovers not fighters and that is their loveliest quality but also their biggest weakness. unlike the other houses whom are fusions between the natives and Lilith this house is the only house besides the 11th house in which 11th and the native are separate and because of the natives emotional nature, Lilith readily devours them. These natives must learn to fight otherwise they will fall victim to Lilith's heavy presence. through their battle with Lilith these natives become remarkably strong, often powerful spiritualist and even stronger at protecting themselves from dark energy in their later years.

#Mine #Lilith in the houses

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tawakkull · 4 years

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Spirituality in islam: Safa’ (Purity)

Safa’, in the language of Islamic Sufism, signifies the state of a heart at peace because it has been purified of all kinds of things that contaminate it, such as sin, feelings of vengeance, jealousy, and hatred, and suspicion of others. The verse (38:47), They were, in Our sight, among the most purified, chosen, truly godly ones, which expresses the holiness and greatness of some Prophets, stresses purity in the greatest degree. The word mustafa, derived from safa, and which means pure essence, extract or the cream of something, is the special used to express in particular the rank of our Prophet, due to his being the essence and cream of existence and the master of both worlds-this and the next. So, having a special distinction among all ranks and being a symbol of transcendence among the Prophets, it has always been a goal toward which the Prophets and the purified, saintly scholars have tried to rise.

Purity originates from the purest and most blessed of sources and reaches the pool of the human heart, from which it issues and flows into other hearts to enlighten them on new wavelengths according to the capacity and disposition of each and the requirements of time and conditions. It sheds light on the ways of the travelers to the Truth so that they can follow them easily. It purifies their hearts and equips them with sincerity, guiding them to the truth of Divinity, causing their spirits to move in ecstasy with the infinite pleasures of supplication and their hearts to move with love, zeal, and yearning for meeting the Beloved. It is usually dealt with in three categories:

The first is purity of knowledge. It occurs when a traveler continues the journey under the guidance and in the light of the knowledge taught by the Messenger, upon him be peace and blessings. The Book and the Prophetic Sunna are followed strictly and with utmost care during the journey, the requirements of doing so being never neglected. With the good pleasure of God as the sole aim of the journey, the traveler faces all hardships and difficulties, without ever losing the resolve to continue on the way.

In other words, purity of knowledge occurs when an initiate who is traveling under the guidance of the sun of Prophethood, puts heart, spirit, and reason under the command of this sun. Following him to the utmost possible in all thoughts, actions, and attitudes, the traveler is annihilated and revived in him, and appeals to his judgment to solve all the problems encountered. The traveler is honored with various favors to the extent of love and knowledge of the supreme goal-God-and zeal and yearning to meet with Him in the footsteps of the pride of Messengers, upon him be peace and blessings. The author of the Gulshan al-Tawhid (“The Rose-Garden of Divine Oneness”), talks about this rank as follows:

Go and pursue such knowledge that

It can open your heart and solve all your problems.

By contrast, any knowledge that does not inspire in people the true aim of life and, in order to realize that aim, does not equip their sight with the necessary light, their will with strength, their spirits with love and zeal, and their hearts with the desire to reach the realms beyond the heavens, is not promising, even though it may not be a delusion or mere illusion.

The second rank in purity is purity of state. It occurs when the heart opens and closes with the awe of God and love of the truth. It expresses its excitement and anxiety in supplications and entreaties to the Almighty, removing feelings of loneliness and gloom that come between it and the truth, becoming a hill where the breezes of peace blow. Setting itself solely on God alongside all the other faculties, such as the emotions, consciousness, and perception, the heart flings all else except the Almighty into the abyss of nothingness, like a stone, in order that nothing should veil God from it.

When seekers after Truth attain the state of purity and refinement, their hearts overflow with the manifestations of the truth of Divinity, their spirits are flooded with the love of truth, and enraptured with the real beauty of existence which they observe through the windows that have been opened in them. In this state, they turn to the Realm of the Holy Presence with the most enchanting of supplications voiced with the full force of their sincere feelings, feelings that have begun to speak instead of themselves. They unburden themselves, feel that God is turning to them, and taste the deepest of pleasures. It even happens that in this state they invoke the Divine Being Himself as Allah-the Proper Name of the Supreme Being encompassing all other Names-and as the All-Merciful (al-Rahman)-the primary Title of the Supreme Being which, like the Name Allah, can be used for Him exclusively-among the Attributes with which they qualify Him. In the rising waves of their feelings, they sense the pleasure that the angels have in worshipping the Almighty, witness the self-possession of other spiritual beings, are enchanted with the mysteries of the higher, incorporeal realms of existence and the beings that inhabit them, and feels as if they have transcended the limits of humanity. In the following couplet, the author of al-Minhaj points to this spiritual state, which one who does not experience it cannot grasp:

Sometimes a person is dumbfounded in this state,

without being able to utter a word,

And sometimes only one who experiences it can know what state this is.

Purity of meeting with God, which is the third rank in purity, occurs when the worshipping servants become as nothing or, to put it in other words, feel and know annihilation of their own being, attributes, and actions in the Being, Attributes and acts of the Necessarily Existent Being, and live immersed in observation of the blazing manifestations of God’s Existence and Knowledge. In other words, the pleasure that the worshipping servant feels in God’s service is combined with, and melts away in, the duties of servanthood due to His being the Lord (One Who creates, sustains, brings up, and protects), and the mysteries of existence become unveiled and come into view on all sides. The manifestations of God’s Existence and Knowledge that pour in completely pervade the conscience, and the shadow of the truth, which will become visible in the other world, begins to be seen with the eye of the heart. To paraphrase the state, God declares to His servants whom He has made near to Him: He hears by Me, and sees by Me, and holds by Me, and walks by Me. So, such servants observe from their observatories of heart and innermost faculties, such as the Secret, the Private and the More Private, the pure spiritual realm with some of its mysteries, and the pure realm of the Divine Dominion with some of its particularities, and the spiritual realm of the Divine Power with some of its aspects, and the truths originating from the Divine Being. They know the substantial truth behind realities that are evident to everybody, and acquires certainty in their knowledge, and their certainty rises to the degree of certainty that comes from direct experience (haqq al-yaqin) according to their capacity. Peculiarities vanish and particular natures melt away in the burning rays of the manifestations of His Face, and only His Self-Subsistence is felt. In this rank, initiates, who have reached a state of pleasure that pervades the whole being, feel as if a drop has become an ocean, a particle the sun, and everything has turned into nothingness. They feel and know Him only, and begin and end with Him, and work by Him. They may go so far as to confuse His Being with His manifestations. Those who are not able to enlighten their feelings, consciousness, and faculties of perception with the light brought by God’s Messenger, may make mistakes or be confused in their comments. Many people have uttered words showing this confusion:

When you have seen the lights of the sun,

You no longer exist, (burnt away by the lights of His Face).

A drop is lost in the waves of the ocean, and you, being a drop,

Have been lost in the ocean of mysteries.

You will no longer be able to find the drop.

Though it is not in the capacity of everyone to be lost,

Those who are annihilated like you are not few.

If those who try to explain purity of meeting with God use words that suggest incarnation and union in order to convey their states and pleasures, they are apt to be confused in their interpretations. Therefore, they must immediately appeal to the light of Muhammad, upon him be peace and blessings, and correct their confusion. On the other hand, those who adopt an interpretation and attitude that arise from a spiritual state and pleasure simply as a thought system and philosophy, are clearly misguided and are regarded as being in rebellion against God until they enter the way of the Messenger and his Companions.

O God! Show us the truth as the truth and enable us to observe it; show us falsehood as falsehood and enable us to avoid it.

O God! We ask You for forgiveness, health, and approval. O God! Guide us to what You like and are pleased with; and may Your peace and blessings be upon our master Muhammad, the sun of guidance, and means of happiness, and on his family and all of his Companions.

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wisdomrays · 6 years

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KEY CONCEPTS OF SPIRITUALITY IN ISLAM : Safa' (Purity)

Safa', in the language of Islamic Sufism, signifies the state of a heart at peace because it has been purified of all kinds of things that contaminate it, such as sin, feelings of vengeance, jealousy, and hatred, and suspicion of others. The verse (38:47), They were, in Our sight, among the most purified, chosen, truly godly ones, which expresses the holiness and greatness of some Prophets, stresses purity in the greatest degree. The word mustafa, derived from safa, and which means pure essence, extract or the cream of something, is the special used to express in particular the rank of our Prophet, due to his being the essence and cream of existence and the master of both worlds-this and the next. So, having a special distinction among all ranks and being a symbol of transcendence among the Prophets, it has always been a goal toward which the Prophets and the purified, saintly scholars have tried to rise.

In other words, purity of knowledge occurs when an initiate who is traveling under the guidance of the sun of Prophethood, puts heart, spirit, and reason under the command of this sun. Following him to the utmost possible in all thoughts, actions, and attitudes, the traveler is annihilated and revived in him, and appeals to his judgment to solve all the problems encountered. The traveler is honored with various favors to the extent of love and knowledge of the supreme goal-God-and zeal and yearning to meet with Him in the footsteps of the pride of Messengers, upon him be peace and blessings. The author of the Gulshan al-Tawhid ("The Rose-Garden of Divine Oneness"), talks about this rank as follows:

Go and pursue such knowledge that It can open your heart and solve all your problems.

Sometimes a person is dumbfounded in this state, without being able to utter a word, And sometimes only one who experiences it can know what state this is.

Purity of meeting with God, which is the third rank in purity, occurs when the worshipping servants become as nothing or, to put it in other words, feel and know annihilation of their own being, attributes, and actions in the Being, Attributes and acts of the Necessarily Existent Being, and live immersed in observation of the blazing manifestations of God's Existence and Knowledge. In other words, the pleasure that the worshipping servant feels in God's service is combined with, and melts away in, the duties of servanthood due to His being the Lord (One Who creates, sustains, brings up, and protects), and the mysteries of existence become unveiled and come into view on all sides. The manifestations of God's Existence and Knowledge that pour in completely pervade the conscience, and the shadow of the truth, which will become visible in the other world, begins to be seen with the eye of the heart. To paraphrase the state, God declares to His servants whom He has made near to Him: He hears by Me, and sees by Me, and holds by Me, and walks by Me. So, such servants observe from their observatories of heart and innermost faculties, such as the Secret, the Private and the More Private, the pure spiritual realm with some of its mysteries, and the pure realm of the Divine Dominion with some of its particularities, and the spiritual realm of the Divine Power with some of its aspects, and the truths originating from the Divine Being. They know the substantial truth behind realities that are evident to everybody, and acquires certainty in their knowledge, and their certainty rises to the degree of certainty that comes from direct experience (haqq al-yaqin) according to their capacity. Peculiarities vanish and particular natures melt away in the burning rays of the manifestations of His Face, and only His Self-Subsistence is felt. In this rank, initiates, who have reached a state of pleasure that pervades the whole being, feel as if a drop has become an ocean, a particle the sun, and everything has turned into nothingness. They feel and know Him only, and begin and end with Him, and work by Him. They may go so far as to confuse His Being with His manifestations. Those who are not able to enlighten their feelings, consciousness, and faculties of perception with the light brought by God's Messenger, may make mistakes or be confused in their comments. Many people have uttered words showing this confusion:

When you have seen the lights of the sun, You no longer exist, (burnt away by the lights of His Face). A drop is lost in the waves of the ocean, and you, being a drop, Have been lost in the ocean of mysteries. You will no longer be able to find the drop. Though it is not in the capacity of everyone to be lost, Those who are annihilated like you are not few.

O God! Show us the truth as the truth and enable us to observe it; show us falsehood as falsehood and enable us to avoid it. O God! We ask You for forgiveness, health, and approval. O God! Guide us to what You like and are pleased with; and may Your peace and blessings be upon our master Muhammad, the sun of guidance, and means of happiness, and on his family and all of his Companions.

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fuckyfarnes · 6 years

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Santa Buddy

It was my pleasure to be part of the @mattelektrasecretsanta this year and I’m so happy I was. Merry Christmas Babbles @babblesthemomfriend! I hope you enjoy your fic!

Sincerely, your Secret Santa!

Title: Santa Buddy

Matt and Foggy find a dog, but is Elektra even a dog person?

Santa Buddy

The smell of wet fur was the last thing Elektra expected to come home to - well not the last thing, but it was up there. Sighing, she slipped off her boots and jacket, and walked into the living room. Sure enough Matt was on the couch towel drying a wiggling pile of fluff. His shirt was soaked through and his pants looked to be in a similar state, but he was smiling so sincerely it made Elektra’s chest ache.

“Matthew,” she said. “What’s going on here?”

“Foggy and I found her in an alley!” he said excitedly. “She didn’t have any tags or anything.”

“And you didn’t bring her to a shelter?”

“It was way too late for that,” he said.

That was a complete lie seeing as it wasn’t even nine yet, but she chose not to call him on it. “What’s her name?” she asked.

Matt blushed. “I don’t know,” he replied.

“Come on Matthew,” she teased. “What have you named the poor creature?”

“Princess,” he mumbled.

“Princess,” she couldn’t believe her ears. The helpless animal was rescued from the street only to have been given a ridiculous name.

“Before you say anything, Foggy and I wanted to let her know that she’s safe and loved now. She deserves to have a good life after living on the street,” he said and made Elektra’s heart swell.

Matt had the purest heart of anyone, she knew that already, but that was definitely a refresher. He never ceased to amaze her with his kindness.

“I know you’re not really an animal person but Foggy can’t keep her and she’s got no place to go.”

She sighed and shook her head. “I thought you knew me better than this.”

“Elektra-”

“We’ve got to get her some tags and vaccinations,” she said and shifted closer to the two of them. “Then of course she’ll need other things; I have no idea what or how much but it’ll add up soon enough.”

“I’ve got that internship,” he added.

“What I’m saying is that she’s going to get whatever she needs and then some.”

Matt beamed at her and Princess yapped happily. “Hear that Princess,” Matt crooned. “Mommy Elektra is just as happy to have you as I am!”

“Mommy Elektra,” she muttered. Maybe that was a little much.

As it turned out, most of Princess’s fluffiness was matted fur. Upon going to the vet Princess was identified as a pitbull mix and given her basic shots, as well as given a check up. She was underweight but thankfully not severely and surprisingly healthy given having lived on the street.

“She’s a very happy girl,” Dr. Rand said and scratched behind Princess’s ear gently. “And she’s very cute.”

Princess’s tale wagged and she nudged Dr. Rand’s hand for another scratch. “You’ll need to go to city hall and get a proper licence in order to register her legally, but she’s good to go other than that.”

“Here Princess,” Matt all but chirped and Princess got down off the table, strode over to him, and sat down at his feet. She looked up at him with such love in her eyes - Elektra was shocked to see that expression on an animal. Princess clearly adored him even after such a short time together.

Elektra knew the feeling very well.

“So we just need to go to a pet store to get things for her?” he asked.

Dr. Rand nodded. “We sell dog food here - only the healthiest of course - and you can get a temporary collar if you wish.”

“How about we buy the food here, Matthew?” Elektra asked. Getting the healthiest food for their little girl was a top priority - dear god, she was beginning to think like Matt would. “It’s only right to get her the best there is.”

Matt smiled at her so sweetly it hurt. “Sounds good to me,” he replied. “Doesn’t that sound good, girl?” he cooed and pet Princess’s head. Her tail beat against the floor and her tongue lolled out happily. She had to admit that Princess was very adorable and sweet.

“Alright,” Dr. Rand said. “I’ll get you all set up.”

They ended up leaving the vet’s office with two big bags of dog food, a small box of bags for her droppings, and a temporary

collar. Getting her a licence was surprisingly easy given how terrible and tedious dealing with government representatives usually was; Matt took the lead on that and had the clerk eating out of his hand in minutes. He was way more of a people person than she was, so she and Princess stayed outside the building on a bench. It turned out to be somewhat of a bonding time because of the reaction of people passing by.

Everyone who took the time to get a look at Princess looked either appalled or freaked out. She was easily identifiable as part pitbull now that her fur was brushed out and pitbulls were regarded as a breed to be feared. Every time anyone looked at her sideways Elektra glared at them,

daring them to say something. She wouldn’t hesitate to defend Princess because she was incredibly sweet and didn’t deserve to be treated that way— she also knew what it was like to be looked at like that and didn’t want that for anyone else.

A man stopped and stared at the two of them warily. “Is that a pitbull?” he asked.

“Partly,” she replied cooly.

“You really shouldn’t have one of those on the street without a muzzle,” he said and continued to stare at her. “They’re dangerous.”

“People are more in danger of getting bitten by me than they are of anything by her,” she said with a completely straight expression. The man recoiled and walked away muttering to himself.

Princess turned to look at her and tilted her head to the side. “I know,” she said. “People can be complete swines about things they know nothing about. But I know better than to accept that kind of behaviour — I won’t let anyone be mean to you ever again.”

Princess barked and nuzzled Elektra’s arm. The dog was just oozing affection

and gratitude. Elektra smiled and gave Princess’s head a few gentle scratches to appease her. “I have to admit it; you’re quite adorable,” she said softly. “Thankfully Matthew and Foggy found you.”

Matt cleared his throat from behind her and the two of them turned to look at him. Princess’s tail thumped against the ground eagerly. Elektra blushed and scratched her head again.

“Not a word,” she said and got a snort in reply — she couldn’t tell if it were Matt or Princess who did it.

Princess turned out to be a wonderful companion for both Matt and Elektra. Although Matt had never wanted a service dog he bought her a little vest and started taking her with him whenever he could. She was a dutiful little angel and listened to whatever he said despite having not been trained.

Elektra found herself falling — Princess became like a daughter to her, she was part of their little ‘family’ in no time. She spoiled Princess like no other; she brought her treats whenever she came back home and even began to order clothes for her. It was easily the best decision she’d ever made because there was nothing cuter than a dog wearing clothes. As the weather got colder Princess’s closet expanded into coats and boots, which were easily the most darling things she’d ever seen.

But they paled in comparison to when she found out about dog costumes. Sure she’d seen dogs wearing them before during Halloween and they’d been cute, but she hadn’t given them much thought before Princess. Halloween had long since passed and left Christmas in its wake, which meant a variety of holiday costumes to choose from. Princess started wearing Santa suits and ugly Christmas sweaters, even little hats. Elektra made sure to get very textured things so that Matt could feel just how ridiculous they were and enjoy them too.

“Come on Princess,” Elektra cooed and aled her out of the apartment. The building’s walkway was unshoveled and Princess wasn’t a big fan of snow, so it was a harrowing task to get her to go out for her daily walk. Elektra wasn’t the type to give up though. “It’s okay, the snow won’t hurt you.”

Matt snickered and she rolled her eyes at him. “It would be nice if you helped, Matthew,” she said.

“I think you’ve got this under control,” he replied. Princess turned to him and whined loudly in protest.

“We have the only dog in Hell’s Kitchen who isn’t loving this snow,” Elektra muttered. “Ridiculous.”

“She’s shivering!” Matt gasped and knelt down, letting Princess huddle close to him. “Her fur isn’t thick enough for this!”

“Matthew, her fur is definitely thick enough. Dogs get winter coats and she’s wearing a jacket,” she assured him.

He didn’t look all too convinced, and Princess’s continued whining did nothing to help the situation. She trembled and pressed closer to him, blocking out Elektra completely. She knew then that it was a trick; Princess was playing on Matt’s emotions in order to avoid going on a walk when she didn’t want to because she knew he was the weaker link out of the two of them.

Truth be told, Elektra couldn’t have been more proud.

Every year, as soon as Christmas rolled around, Elektra started finding mistIetoe around their apartment. It was a tradition that Foggy had started playing on Matt during their college days that had managed to stick around after, and Matt

took it upon himself to continue it when he and Elektra moved in together.

But mistletoe was dangerous for pets, so that year there was no mistletoe anywhere.

It was strange to deal with because when it was happening, Elektra didn’t care one way or another, but now that it wasn’t an option it was depressing. She missed randomly finding pieces in her shoes, in the shower, and many other ridiculous words places, and had grown to love the tradition without really noticing. Every time she came home she found herself looking for any sign of mistletoe and never found any, but losing out on it was a small price to pay for Princess’s health and safety.

But Matt wasn’t one to let things go so easily.

By the time Elektra managed to get home on Christmas Eve, it was after nine and she was exhausted. Being stuck in traffic was a harrowing affair and being at work that day had been a huge waste of time; everyone was frazzled and annoyed to be at work instead of having a day off, so getting anything done was like pulling teeth. All she really wanted to do was get into bed and sleep for a solid week, regardless of the fact that she, Matt, and Princess had to go to a big family party the next day.

There was a plate of Chinese food waiting for her when she got home, but Matt and Princess were nowhere in sight. Truth be told she wanted to get into bed with Matt and sleep for a week because they hadn’t been seeing much of each other. She was never one to express emotions very well, but she missed him dearly and oftentimes wanted to be around him whenever she could. She left the plate in the kitchen and looked went to the bedroom, finding Princess asleep in her dog bed at the bottom of their own.

Again, Matt was nowhere in sight.

The quiet of the house made tears randomly well up in her eyes and she slumped down on the edge of the bed. The day really had taken it out of her and she hadn’t expected to be alone that night. Even Princess was sleeping and she couldn’t wake her up - she needed sleep even if Elektra needed comfort. Matt was probably out preparing for Christmas dinner with Foggy and Karen, so she had no reason to be so upset, but she was. She wanted him to be there for her after not really having time with each other for a week.

Elektra sniffled and wiped at her eyes angrily. The sudden sadness was extremely frustrating and she wasn’t about to let it happen for much longer. She stood up and quickly undressed, changed into her pajamas, and climbed into bed. If she was spending Christmas Eve alone, then she was going straight to bed.

Naturally as soon as her eyes closed she heard noises coming from the living room. She rolled her eyes and pulled the blanket over her head, not even bothering to get up. If it’s a murderer, they’ve got another thing coming, she thought and shut her eyes tightly.

“Princess,” she heard Matt whisper. “Come on sweetie, wake up.”

Princess’s nails clacked against the floor and she heard the sound of a bag rustling. Princess yapped and Matt made a gentle noise to placate her all while still rustling the bag. Matt cursed a few times and knocked into things, but eventually stopped.

“I know you’re awake,” Matt said to her. “Are you feeling alright?”

“I’m fine, Matthew.”

“Are you sure?” he asked. The worry in his tone made her take the blanket off of her head and her annoyance drained out of her immediately.

Matt was decked out in a shirt with knitted mistletoe on it and had a mistletoe headband on. Princess had one on too and was sitting patiently at Matt’s feet. When she saw that Elektra was awake her tongue lolled out happily and she dove up onto the bed.

“You got mistletoe?” she asked softly.

Matt grinned and nodded, the mistletoe on his headband bobbing along with him. “It’s a tradition, right?”

She couldn’t hold back a giggle, which promptly turned into a laughing fit.

“A tradition is a tradition, Ellie,” Matt said, his voice leaking with happiness.

“Get over here,” she said once she stopped laughing. “I owe you something.”

Matt grinned and made his way to her. Just as their lips brushed, Princess dove in between them because she was wearing mistletoe too - so naturally she deserved some kisses too.

#mattelektrasecretsanta #mattelektra #mo made

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samdukewieland · 4 years

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Stuck Inside Media Diary Week 5

I realized the last movie I saw in theaters was Little Women for the third time. Then that got me thinking about how I ranked my Top whatever movies from last year and inconsequential ranking things is. It was probably the movie that makes me feel the best; it and Knives Out were the two movies I saw the most in a theater last year and they were both the ones that I get excited talking about with people. Good flicks, you should check ‘em out. (I also re-learned recently that Emma Stone was originally supposed to play Meg who was played by Emma Watson. Had this happened, my brain would’ve collapsed due to trying to figure out how to balance crushes on Greta Gerwig, Saoirse Ronan, Florence Pugh, Laura Dern and Emma Stone all in the same thing).

Sunday, April 19

Deliverance, Boorman 1972

On the one hand there is no real way to prepare you for how awful the assault on Ned Beatty and John Voight scene is as well as having me wonder if this was actually a Vietnam movie masked in something about the destruction of the natural world (maybe it’s both or just one). On the other hand, I thought it’d be funny to compare the characters to this to the characters in American Pie, but there’s no Stiffler or Jim’s Dad in this movie, so it doesn’t completely work.

Mad Men, “Long Weekend”, “Indian Summer”, “Nixon Vs. Kennedy”, “The Wheel” [season 1 finale]

There’s two things I’ll never forget the first time I ran through the first season of Mad Men: 1. Thinking “is Don even good at his job? I don’t think we’ve even seen this guy even really do his job yet, how did he become partner?” and then “The Wheel happens”. 2. I had let one of my favorite History teachers borrow my DVDs (this would happen again in my life when I later lent my English teacher The Wire when I was a senior two years later) and when he finished the first season he and I talked about what dumb-dumb idiots we were because we hadn’t figured out that Peggy was definitely pregnant and were surprised by this revelation, while his girlfriend at the time figured it out instantly.

Parks And Rec, “Greg Pikitis”, “Ron And Tammy”

That these two episodes were on back-to-back was probably the moment in the public consciousness that Parks was the real deal. How could you not; I watch “Greg Pikitis” every Halloween.

The Last Dance, Parts 1 & 2

I can’t remember the last thing I watched in real time on the tv. It’s very possible, though I don’t think so, that The Last Dance might be quarantine great and in real life very, very good. It doesn’t really matter, because this thing is just crazy fun to watch, as a person who was not able to watch Jordan basketball and sometimes thinks that Gen Xers gets way too [whatever that Spongebob meme is where you capitalize every other letter in a sentence] about Michael Jordan. The music cues are God-tier.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Shows You Iron”, “Joe Pera Takes You To Breakfast”, “Joe Pera Takes You On A Fall Drive”

“Joe Pera Takes You To Breakfast” might be one of the funniest episodes of television I’ve seen in a long time. As someone who takes too much enjoyment in stream of consciousness humor, I might be too in the bag for this show. I certainly don’t know how to sell it to any of you, other than it might be the perfect counterpart to Review. That could just be that Joe Pera looks like an alt-universe Andy Daly or it could be that Forrest MacNeil could’ve, desperately, used a friend like Joe Pera if only just to see how they’d interact with each other.

Monday, April 20

Under The Silver Lake, Mitchell 2018 [as of now this is available on Prime]

I’m embarrassed that I caved into watching a stoner movie on 4/20, but I’m glad it was this. This weird, gross and beautifully shot weird little movie that really did some good work in reminding me that Andrew Garfield is good. People will argue that this broke his brain, when in reality it was those two embarrassing Spider-Man movies.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Shows You How To Dance”, “Joe Pera Talks You Back To Sleep”, “Joe Pera Reads You The Church Announcements”

So “Church Announcements” was the first episode of this show that I had ever seen, because I had three different friends recommend it to me because I had posted something about “Baba O’Riley” very off-handedly, not even knowing this episode existed. It’s probably the purest expression of joy and one of the most sincerely happy things I might have ever seen. I love this show so much.

Tuesday, April 21

The Birdcage, Nichols 1996 [as of now this is available on Prime]

This is a good reminder that Nathan Lane is insanely talented and easily one of the most undervalued performers alive. I wanted to watch a Gene Hackman movie and this was available and it’s pretty good. Sometimes plays shouldn’t be turned into movies, that’s my take here-what do you want from me.

Better Call Saul, “Something Unforgivable”

Safe to say Saul’s got the belt. I was listening to Greenwald and Ryan the other night and someone had throughout a hypothetical to them that if they could would they want Gilligan and the gang to to remake Breaking Bad now, and have that (essentially) be the spin-off from Saul instead of vice-versa. That then got me thinking about if there’s ever been a property that’s taken place within the same universe that waited almost a season and a half to introduce the character (or thing) that connected the two things? There’s probably some kind of sci-fi or fantasy story that nerds would be eager to inform me of and it’s called 2une or something like that. Cool if so! If not, then no one steal my idea, this could be huge.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Lights Up The Night with You”, “Joe Pera Talks to You About the Rat Wars of Alberta, Canada (1950–Present Day)”, “Joe Pera Answers Your Questions About Cold Weather” [Season 1 finale]

“Can you believe those jag-offs through a New Year’s Eve party with just one bottle of Disarooney” is something I just say out loud when I’m frustrated now. I stayed up until like 3AM last Tuesday wrapping up the first season.

Wednesday, April 22

The Stranger, Welles 1946 [as of now this is available on Netflix]

First Orson Welles movie. It was fine! I don’t really think it should’ve been an hour-and-a-half long, but I was also surprised that they were already making movies about Nazis escaping to the US in 1946, but I’m definitely not a historian and I’m sure a lot of things would surprise me about 1946. It’s also a public domain movie which is just kinda....weird and would probably piss off Orson Welles or maybe he’d be thrilled.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Hughes 1986 [as of now this is available on Netflix]

Maybe the best use of a Beatles song in a movie that doesn’t star The Beatles? I used to go back and forth on whether or not I like this movie, because so many people do like it and I used to be loathe to conform to non-controversial opinions. But something I think that gets really overlooked is how well this movie is shot-Hughes had a real eye for framing and blocking. Or maybe people talk about this all the time and I just haven’t cared to ever listen or seek it out.

The Plot Against America, “Part 2″

Mad Men, [Season 2 premier] “For Those Who Think Young”, “Flight 1″

I had forgotten how GD disorienting this show can be when it goes out of its way to not tell you how much time has passed between each season (it’s like 15 months this time). That’s all I’ve got now, that and Duck Phillips: welcome back into my life, you sick son of a bitch.

Joe Pera Talks With You, [Season 2 premier] “Joe Pera Talks With You About Beans”, “Joe Pera Takes You On A Hike”

Thursday, April 23

Harold And Maude, Ashby 1971 [as of now this is available on Prime]

Another entry in the “I didn’t realize how many movies try to be this one” book. Really funny, and so shockingly dark, I can’t imagine how much people hated this when it first came out and how hard of a sell it would be to try and talk someone into seeing it. Probably what I liked most about it was how earned the sense of finding joy in life is in this movie, considering how cynical it is in depicting the fetishization guys tend to do with the notion of suicide. It’s quirky without being twee (if you want that, I guess go to Rushmore, a movie I adore, but definitely borrows heavily from this, something Anderson wouldn’t ever deny).

Mad Men, “The Benefactor”, “Three Sundays”

Harry Crane’s campaign to be the least liked person in Mad Men, you could argue, starts more-so here than it did in the finale of S1 when he cheats on his wife.

The Plot Against America, “Part 3″

I don’t think anything, Television-wise, has benefited less from the pandemic than TPAA. Of course it would happen to a David Simon show and maybe it’s a good thing, considering how the number of bad takes would greatly outweigh the number of good takes that would come about if there was some more attention on it.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Waits With You”, “Joe Pera Guides You Through The Dark”

I can’t remember the last time I laughed as hard as I did when they started demonstrating the different hair styles you can get when getting your hair cut. These episodes have somehow gotten goofier than the first season and it’s, uh, really good.

Friday, April 24

Parks And Recreation, “The Camel”

Top Chef, Season 17 episode 6

Brooklyn Nine-Nine, “Lights Out”

Dan Goor & Luke Del Tredici is to Brooklyn Nine-Nine as Michael Schur & Aisha Muharrar was to Parks And Recreation.

The Beastie Boys Story, Jonze 2020 [available on AppleTV+]

As with any kind of retrospective, there’s a fair amount of yadda-yadda-ing and maybe not everything totally works with this live-documentary, but it’s so deeply Beastie Boys that I can’t help but just be so grateful that it exists. While it’s like a vaudeville symposium it is absolutely doubles as a love letter to a departed friend and immense talent. The worst thing that could happen is that it’ll just make you want to re-listen to the gods.

Mad Men, “The New Girl”, “Maidenform”

I just can’t believe that Chauncey exits the series the same episode that he enters.This was and still remains the turning point of Duck Phillips: terrible human (and kind of when he turns a little cartoonish).

Saturday, April 25

Parks And Recreation, “Hunting Trip”

Mad Men, “The Gold Violin”, “A Night To Remember”, “Six Month Leave”, “The Inheritance”, “The Jet Set”

Quite a run of episodes here for ole Mad Men here. Always love when they remind us that everyone really underestimates Ken Cosgrove (even himself). And as I was watching “Six Month Leave” it kind of hit me that this is an outlier episode of Mad Men. It’s so much of a whole that I find it hard to put one episode above another, but if I needed just an episode of Mad Men to watch at random like a year or so from now, this is one that would really stick out to me. A great farewell to a great Murray brother.

Bad Education, Finley 2019 [available on HBO Now/Go]

It sucks that HBO makes more bad movies than it does good, but when they’re good, man they’re really good. It hits some HBO movie bingo squares which are kind of eye-rolley to me, but all-in-all, this is a really outstanding little movie. It feels weird that it’s taken this long for Ray Romano to start carving out a character actor niche for himself, but I’m just happy we’re finally here! I saw someone compare it to or with Wolf Of Wall Street and as someone not from Long Island I feel confident in saying that they’re a helluva Long Island scum-bag (repetitive?) double feature.

The Plot Against America, “Part 4″

Was really hoping this was going to be the thing that made people remember that Winona is incredible and not Stranger Things, but that’d require like a dozen monkey’s paw wishes that I just don’t have. (What a world it’d be if The Plot Against America adaptation somehow eclipsed Stranger Things in terms of cultural significance) However badly I wanted that though, this has really been Zoe Kazan’s show-a quieter role than Anthony Boyle (who I am also just floored by) but more effective in how much internal processing she’s doing with this character.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Takes You To The Grocery Store”, “Joe Pera Goes To Dave Wojcek’s Bachelor Party With You”

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zachattha-blog · 5 years

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Current Muslim and Non Muslim Worlds

Let us have a look at the current, mainly religious, conditions of both Muslim and non Muslim worlds. Much is being discussed about and compared between those two parts of the contemporary world. Topic and comparison is not an easy one, but still it is the need of the day that we bring it to the light to improve the understanding and chances of mutual respect and cooperation. My purpose here is not to create or strengthen divisions rather I want to express my personal observations and feelings in an open and candid way. Today, I will be discussing Muslim World.

Quite Divided: The Muslim world today is much divided, and as a result weaker. No community or group of people can be strong without being united and connected. Muslims are divided on so many levels. First, they are much absorbed in national feelings. To love one’s nation or country is not bad but if these feelings overpower the feelings of Muslim brotherhood and bond or worldview of Islam then it is bad. Islam teaches that love for it should be higher than any other feelings or attachments.

Secondly, Muslims are divided religiously; they are following different sects and directions. To have different opinions or interpretations of Islamic teachings is not wrong as long as it remains within the limits permitted by Islam. There are mainly four schools of thought in Islamic world and all of them were initiated by four very pious and knowledgeable persons. Their intention was never to divide Muslims rather they gave different interpretations of teachings of the religion to make it easy to understand and follow but following generations due to lack of knowledge, sincerity and research could not keep the right approach/spirit and got divided and became rigid and intolerant towards one another. Islam allows difference of opinion but forbids sectarianism but today Muslims feel proud in attachment to it. It is time for the Muslim world to come out of the sects and look at Islam broadly and in its purest and original form. They should research about teachings of Islam, its history and today’s world and then connect them and take a course ahead wisely.

Thirdly, Muslims are divided politically. There is no clear political understanding, ideology and direction of the Muslim world. Political parties are mostly corrupt and without clear directions, blindly oppose each other and divide people unnecessarily. Some countries are following democracy, others monarchy, others dictatorship and some mixture of different forms of governance. Islam allows all those forms of governance that are within its broad and general rules and forbids all that is opposing to its guidelines. Here again Muslim world need to study Islamic guidelines and also all modern and old forms of governance and choose what is best and within Islamic rules and laws.

Fourthly, Muslims are different on economic lines. There are countries and individuals who are very wealthy and have no limit of luxuries and resources and there are those, on the other side, who are extremely poor even unable to meet the basic needs of life. Economic system of Islam in general is being ignored. This economic imbalance and diversion is badly affecting the Muslim world. It is causing waste of natural and human resources and creating many social and political problems. Muslims need to create an economic order that is taught by the universal and eternal teachings of Islam. Here too they should learn from the contemporary economic systems and adopt all what is necessary and permitted by Islam. It will not only benefit Muslims but also the world at large.

Another division among Muslims is racial or ethnic one. Islam denies not the ethnic or racial attachment and natural feelings towards it but it allows not that these feelings should be higher than Muslim brotherhood or become a source of arrogance or superiority complex. This again reflects the lack of understanding and implementation of Islamic teachings, Islam teaches Muslims should always give Islamic and Human attachment preference over racial one.

Education and Science: Majority of Muslims is not educated and lacks scientific and other modern knowledge. This is always disadvantageous. If a person or group of people doesn’t gain knowledge of the time, it means they are going to lag behind others. Muslim world since many centuries has left researching and learning about the latest knowledge. It is not just science and technology, they have not made much progress in others fields too like politics, economics, sociology, philosophy etc.

There is always a language of the age which contains the maximum and most modern knowledge. That language today is English. Those who learn the language of the day have best chance of being most learned and here too Muslim world is behind. The situation will not change in one day; it will require much thinking, planning and efforts. There should be at least feeling that we are missing the modern knowledge and how we should fill the gap. This however does not mean that Muslims should feel inferiority complex but the will and planning to bridge the gap should be there.

Religious Awareness: When it comes to the Islamic knowledge including Quran, Hadith, Fiqh, History, Philosophy etc and also some basic knowledge of other religions, Muslim world again is not in very healthy state. There are lot of sects, groups and radical differences among Muslims. Very few people are able to study and understand basic teachings of Islam independently, majority of Muslims is dependent upon religious scholars who are mostly following different sects and schools of thought quite rigidly without trying to understand and tolerate each other. Difference of opinion is not taken as something positive and healthy, it is considered as negative and intolerable. If a person is not ready to listen and understand different opinions, how can he/she learn and grow?

It is necessary that educated elites come forward and put efforts to understand religion and different opinions themselves, and also encourage other Muslims to do the same so that an environment of broader thinking, learning and tolerance develops among Muslims. It is expected from the religious scholars they make sincere efforts to understand and tolerate each other. They should take difference of opinions as blessing not a curse and should also encourage their followers to live openly and friendlily with followers of others sects and groups. Islam can’t be and shouldn’t be restricted to any particular sect or ideology; it makes it small and that is not acceptable.

Research Work: As I mentioned above, Muslims currently, are not ready for the broader and deeper research work neither on religion nor on other fields of life. They are a kind of stuck and clueless and this is making their situation difficult with every passing day. It is absolutely important for Muslims that they exert their efforts in this direction otherwise situation will not be getting better for them.

Unfortunately, religious scholars also are deficient at worldly knowledge and sciences. It is important to understand both religion and world that completes the whole picture of life. If you know religious knowledge and not worldly, you will always lack confidence and understanding of the things in broader and real sense. On the other side if one only possesses the worldly knowledge and no religious knowledge, it will also be a source of big troubles because life and its ultimate purpose can’t be understood without religious knowledge. It is therefore absolutely important to have both divine and worldly knowledge. They both complement each other. Religion is not for space, it is revealed for the worldly affairs and life, and if a person knows not about world how he/she can apply religious guidance to it, and if knows not religion how he/she can understand life and its purpose?

Emotional: Muslims have very strong emotional attachment to their faith and religion which is not at all bad. They, however, somehow sometimes have a negative and a kind of hostile view towards other religions which needs to be changed. What they really need to do is not only study, understand and follow their own religion but also have some basic understanding of other contemporary religions. This will not only help them understand the beauty and strength of their own religion but also help understand other religions and their followers. This will open up doors for them to better convey the message of Islam across other faiths, communities and religions. This will create a kind of sympathy and brotherhood with followers of the religions that will result into a more friendly, peaceful and sympathetic world.

Muslims in non Muslim Countries: I have a kind of feeling that Muslims living in non Muslim countries are much more educated, advance, alert, open and intelligent. They have certain advantages over other Muslims like they interact and know other religion(s), culture(s), language(s) and communities which Muslims living in Muslim countries in general don’t. Whenever a person has such an environment he/she is able to compare and analyze things much more broadly and critically. On the other hand a person who never interacted with any other community, culture or religion can’t know easily strengths and weaknesses of his/her own religion, culture or country. Another thing that makes Muslims living in non Muslim lands special is their living and surviving as a minority. When you are a minority somewhere you have to be much alert, competitive, aware, strong and careful. Those Muslims who live as majority can’t know those feelings and circumstances.

It is expected from Muslims living in non Muslim lands that they be open and friendly with their fellow countrymen. They should exchange the worldviews; this will make their lives easier because mutual understanding increases the chances of cooperation and friendliness. To do this they should improve on understanding of their own religion first and foremost because without having enough knowledge of Islam one can’t convey the correct picture. Non Muslims are quite interested in learning about Muslims and Islam, so this opportunity should not be wasted, it will be beneficial for all, and if Muslims living in non Muslim lands could not properly convey the message of Islam to their countrymen, it would create problems for them not only in this life but also in hereafter. They should not take this task and responsibility easy because those people will plead against them on the Day of Judgment if they don't convey the message to them.

Convert Muslims: Here, I don’t want to miss mentioning the converted Muslims. I consider them real asset and big hope of the Muslim world. They come from different backgrounds, religions, cultures and groups. They generally study Islam and Muslims very deeply and keenly and then make an independent decision to embrace Islam. Let me tell you to adopt a new faith and religion is never easy because your faith and religion is like foundation of your life, and to question and change it, is one of the hardest things. But once one is able to reach the best faith and religion, he/she will feel the confidence, inner peace and strength which can’t be described in words and found nowhere else. When they make the biggest decision of the life they are relaxed, easy and contended.

These convert Muslims in general are very open, skilled, confident and intelligent because they make a lot of comparisons, reflections and learning. They are bold enough to go against the norms and own cultures and societies and take a path of their own choice. They however face a few problems like have to learn new religion, language and practices. Sometimes they don’t find enough support from the fellow Muslims in their new journey which is discouraging.

It is expected that Muslims take good care of the needs of the fellow convert Muslims who start a new journey and join them. They should be properly educated about Islam and given proper attention to feel comfortable and at home because initially they are weak at Islamic faith, knowledge and its practice, and normally face opposition from family and society. Once these people become good at knowledge and practice of Islam, nothing and none may compete with them. They are very precious and important individuals for the strength of the Muslim world, they are among the best representatives of Islam.

Rulers and Elite: A problem Muslims facing is in many cases the lack of religious, political and worldly knowledge of their rulers and elites. Muslim rulers in general are like ordinary Muslims in this context. They just want to rule by hook or by crook and enjoy power, attention, luxuries, and praises. They are in general clueless what their religion says, what current world situation is, what current world politics is and what Islam says about politics and other areas of life. Muslim rulers either hate western way of governance or have an inferiority complex from it although they should follow a middle and confident path. There are certain exceptions but overall situation is not very promising. And if rulers of a nation are not well equipped at those sciences and knowledge how can one expect betterment for the countries they are ruling? It is the time for Muslim rulers that they improve themselves not only at knowledge of Islam, its practice but also at understanding of current politics and world order.

Resources and Management: Muslim world is rich at natural and human resources, almost everything needed for survival and progress has been bestowed upon Muslims by Allah Almighty, there are extremely talented, able and intelligent individuals among Muslims, but all that is going to waste because of no proper management, coordination and utilization. Muslim young generation is a huge asset but they lack proper education, guidance, training and clear goals in life. It is the high time for the Muslim world that they make good estimate of all their resources and plan for their best management and utilization. A clear coordination and strategy is required in this direction.

Ruling Systems: In Muslim countries political, economic and social systems are a mixture of Islamic and non Islamic teachings/rules and it has made the whole situation complex. Nobody is really sure about the system whether it is secular or religious and what exactly should be done. In reality, not everything is in conflict with the Islamic system of life, in fact many of the modern philosophies/laws/rules are in quite accordance with Islam although naturally there are some conflicts too. This demands proper understanding and research of the current ruling systems in Muslim world to create a harmony in those systems so that religious and non religious elements are brought into coordination, this will give to those systems much needed stability, harmony and strength. In reality more than 80% laws/rules/philosophies are in accordance with Islam as it is the religion of nature, and only unnatural and harmful laws and philosophies are rejected by it.

Muslims should not be afraid of studying, learning and cooperating with the world at large, Islam encourages learning and cooperation without compromising on basics and principles. Learn from West and rest of the world they have made amazing research and progress in almost all fields of human life and then choose all that is in conciliation with Islam and in fact majority of it is in agreement. Muslims can add all that to their lives and rules which is not forbade by Islam and in reality there is a lot that can be learned and added to Muslim laws, systems and lives without compromising on faith and religion, but this requires deeper and wider research, learning and adaptation, which Muslims should not fear.

These are my observations of the current Muslim world, in next post, I will, insha Allah, be giving my observations mainly of the religious conditions of the non Muslim world and finally would share my comparisons, suggestions and possibilities of cooperation and coordination.

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chorusfm · 7 years

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Noah Gundersen’s Restless Heart

In 2014, Noah Gundersen released his first full-length album. The record in question, Ledges, was a masterclass in contemporary folk music, loaded with confessional lyrics, acoustic guitars, and fiddles. By all accounts, Gundersen seemed like a traditionalist. In 2015, Gundersen quickly followed Ledges up with his sophomore LP, the spiritually fraught Carry the Ghost. It was still a folk album, but Noah was fleshing things out, adding fractious electric guitar and other elements of full band instrumentation into the mix. It was clearly the work of a young songwriter who was yearning to grow. Between the fall of 2015 and the early winter of 2016, Gundersen did two tours in support of Carry the Ghost. The first was a full-band endeavor, presenting the songs on Ghost as they were meant to be heard. The second was a solo tour, where Gundersen played songs from both Ledges and Carry the Ghost on acoustic guitar, solo electric guitar, and piano. It was a stark, intimate presentation, and it showed off what made Gundersen so special: his vulnerable, fragile voice; his songs that could work well no matter how much he built them up or stripped them down; and his honest, forthright lyrics. But something was wrong. Gundersen was having a crisis of faith—not the same crisis of religious faith he wrote about on Carry the Ghost, but a crisis of faith in his own art. When I saw Gundersen on the solo tour for Ghost, he was pointedly reserved. He bantered with the audience occasionally, but during the songs, his eyes were cast toward the floor or closed entirely. And at the end of the show, when a condescending moderator led a Q&A session and suggested that Gundersen was “so young” and “couldn’t have possibly experienced what he sang about in his songs,” Noah seemed at a loss for how to answer—at least politely. When the Q&A ended, Gundersen headed quickly for the stage door. “Instead of my life up to that point flashing before my eyes, it was my future,” Gundersen says of that tour in the press materials for his new album, titled White Noise and out September 22. “A future of playing songs I didn’t believe in and pouring my soul out into a vehicle I no longer recognized or loved.” For those who have been following Gundersen for a little while, that statement may or may not be shocking. Gundersen, I’ve gathered, is the kind of artist who turns against his old work as he continues to grow and change. When I spoke to him in the lead-up to the release of Carry the Ghost, Noah explained the evolution in his sound by distancing himself from Ledges. “My taste and my aesthetic has changed since the writing of those songs,” he said. “I wanted to make something that was different, something that I would enjoy listening to.” While Carry the Ghost may have been something Noah would have enjoyed listening to then, though, it probably isn’t anymore. Just like he grew out of the Ledges material, Gundersen now views the Ghost songs with a similar level of detachment—like they were written by someone else instead of from his own pen. “I wish I knew why it happens,” Gundersen said, speaking of his consistent artistic restlessness. “It’s kind of a pain in the ass. I just think I’m perpetually dissatisfied, which can be really frustrating. But it also drives my creativity and my desire to do better and to make things that are better than what I’ve made in the past.” On Carry the Ghost, that desire drove Gundersen to take the contemporary folk sound of his debut and flesh it out. On White Noise, it drives him to take that sound and crash it off a cliff. Where Ghost felt like a natural evolution from its predecessor, White Noise feels every bit as restless as Gundersen seems in conversation. There are three songs that may have fit on previous records. The rest find Noah casting about and exploring new frontiers. He’s helped in his exploration by Nate Yaccino, the friend who Gundersen brought in to produce the record. (Noah self-produced both Ledges and Ghost.) “[Nate] pushed me sonically in a lot of ways that I wouldn’t have necessarily gone on my own,” Gundersen said. “I think having someone to push back against and have a dialogue with, someone who is creatively enhancing the experience, I think that’s really important. This record definitely wouldn’t be what it is without his contributions.” On first listen, some fans—particularly the ones who have been with Noah since the bare bones EPs he made as a teenager—will probably find some of those contributions jarring. Noah’s vocals get pitch-shifted, multi-tracked, and buried in reverb in the middle of “After All,” the 90s rock flavored opener. Laser-blast sound effects and other ambient noises canter around in the background of “Cocaine, Sex, and Alcohol (From a Basement in Los Angeles).” And “New Religion” builds from an organ-drenched piano ballad into a full-on psychedelic, Beatles-inspired bridge. Still, it’s fairly clear that Yaccino isn’t pulling Gundersen anywhere that he wasn’t ready to go on his own. That’s partially because Gundersen is far from the traditional singer/songwriter that he presented himself as on Ledges, but it’s also because he didn’t completely know where he wanted to go when he started making White Noise. “The early formation of the ideas for this record were kind of all over the place,” Gundersen said. “When I started writing it, there was a phase where it was going to be like a Nine Inch Nails record. I was listening to a ton of Nine Inch Nails. Then there was a moment where it was going to be more like a Nick Cave record. And then it was Radiohead’s OK Computer. And Paul Simon’s Still Crazy After All These Years was actually a really influential record for us, too. “So there were a lot of moments along the way where it was going to be something more specific. And then it kind of just morphed into an amalgamation of a lot of the different phases of obsession that I had.” White Noise sounds as scattered as Gundersen’s words imply. Lead single “The Sound” is a surging rocker with shades of Noah’s side band, Young in the City. Ditto for the cheekily titled “Number One Hit of the Summer.” The synth-heavy “Heavy Metals” recalls the 1980s ambient rock style of The 1975. “Bad Desire” is a bluesy pop song that wouldn’t have been out of place on John Mayer’s Battle Studies. “Sweet Talker” has shades of Coldplay’s X&Y and U2’s The Unforgettable Fire. And “Bad Actors” and “Cocaine, Sex, and Alcohol,” likely to be the record’s most polarizing moments, see Noah wearing his Radiohead influence proudly on his sleeve. The themes of the record are no less expansive. In his Facebook post announcing the album, Noah wrote that it was about fear, anxiety, desire, despair, hope, and joy. It’s also about alienation and division, caused by the simultaneous connection and isolation allowed by social media and by the hateful political landscape inspired by our current presidential administration. The statements here aren’t as clear as they were on Carry the Ghost. There, Noah was exorcising years of personal demons about how religion so rarely practices what it preaches. Here, he’s threading a more universal needle—a fact that pushed him to write more toward a feeling or vibe than a literal narrative. “I didn’t want it to be some kind of confessional on-the-nose angst thing,” he said. “I didn’t want to get up and literally say ‘Social media is destroying humanity’ and ‘Trump sucks’ and all this stuff. That feels so cliché and banal when you hear it laid out literally.” At the same time, though, Gundersen also didn’t want to hide his “confessional on-the-nose angst” behind irony or cynicism, in the way that recent records from the likes of Father John Misty and Arcade Fire have done it. He didn’t want to be afraid of his own earnestness—even if being sincere is rarely what moves the needle in music these days. “I’m not an ironist,” he said. “That’s never really been my style. Something that’s been a part of my music for a long time is trying to express human feelings in a simple way, but an intimate way. And I think [this album] is another side of human feeling. It’s something we’re all going through right now. Experiencing the world changing, feeling this sense of fear and anxiety and not really knowing what to do with it. I can only communicate that through the lens that I’ve experienced it, but it does feel like a kind of universal thing that’s been going on. So I think trying to express that, at least through my own lens, is my own little contribution.” White Noise doesn’t feature a single overt political statement, nor does it include any immediately obvious references to social media or subtweet culture. Still, Gundersen is a deft enough songwriter that you can feel those topics in his songs. “The Sound” resonates as a pointed jab at entitled internet goons who refuse to acknowledge their own ignorance. “How many times will you shit on what you’re given?” the song asks; “How many times ‘til you shut up and listen?” “Fear and Loathing,” meanwhile, was written before Trump got elected—Noah was playing the song on his acoustic tour in early 2016—but might be the perfect anthem for the feeling of dread that seems to have blanketed the entire nation this year. “Nothing changes much/The quarterbacks are drunk/The prom queen just gave up/In Fear and Loathing.” In a lot of ways, White Noise is a record about cutting ties with the past. “There’s nothing left for us here now,” Gundersen sings on “Fear and Loathing.” It’s a fitting lyric for one of the few songs on the album that sounds like his old style of music. Even as Noah turns away from folk music, he has to give it at least one more aching send-off. But Gundersen is smart enough to know that, no matter how much he experiments, his purest emotional fireworks still come when it’s just him and an acoustic guitar. That’s why the three songs that sound the most like Ledges and Carry the Ghost—“Fear and Loathing,” “Dry Year,” and “Send the Rain (To Everyone)”—serve as homecomings of sort at the end of the first and second halves of the record. Both “Fear and Loathing and “Send the Rain” build from slow, acoustic starts to big, full-band catharses. “Fear and Loathing” handles the build-up itself, painting the picture of a small town that’s falling apart—breaking its citizens down with it. “Dry Year” and “Send the Rain,” meanwhile, function almost like two parts of a whole. The former is the record’s sparest and most desolate moment, painting a portrait of a world ready to burn. “Some days the world feels like a building on fire/But everyone’s ignoring the smoke/You would vote for a comedian/If he could comfort you with a joke,” Gundersen sings on the record’s closest thing to an overt political lyric. The “dry year,” it turns out, is a metaphorical drought—the result of a world sapped of its values, its empathy, and the genuine human connection that used to keep it spinning. But Noah’s words aren’t judgmental or hateful. Instead, he hopes that someday, things will change. We’ll stop burning ourselves with political wars and stupid insecurities and let the rain save our ravaged world. Even if none of us live to see that day, Noah reckons we can be a part of the solution. When the audible sound of rainfall cuts through the end of “Dry Year,” he sings “Now the sky is giving up her child/To the dead grass of the back lawn/I hope she takes the water in my body when I’m gone.” And as the album’s final song barrels toward its epic climax, it’s to Noah’s repeated cries of “Send the rain, send my love/To everyone,” shouted over the noise of crashing guitars and pounding drums. The message, I think, is simple: in a world on fire, maybe we can all be somebody else’s rain. --- Please consider supporting us so we can keep bringing you stories like this one. ◎ https://chorus.fm/features/noah-gundersens-restless-heart/

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artificialqueens · 7 years

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Not Afraid Anymore Chapter 6 (Pearlet) – Columbia

Hello loves, how is everyone? This chapter is a 6k mess of mixed emotions, Chinese takeout, Clueless, and something that might be considered both a good thing and a bad thing at the end ;-)))) But you’ll have to read it to know what I have in store. I didn’t quite realise how much I had written until the counter thing at the bottom of my screen said page 8… so I hope you have time😊. As always thank you so much for the lovely comments I have received so far, it really warms my heart; feedback and criticism is always welcome, as long as it is constructive of course. I hope you enjoy! Kisses xxx

A bright light shone in Pearl’s direction, her eyes squinting against the harshness. She stood up from where she had sat on the side of the road and placed her hand in front of her face shielding her eyes. The light turned off and she heard the sound of the door clicking open, before seeing a dark figure emerge. “Pearl?” Violet’s soft, caring voice was like music to her ears. She rushed over to her and wrapped her arms around the slightly taller girl’s shoulders. It took a second before Violet responded, gently placing her hand on Pearls back and slowly stroking the end of her hair in an attempt to calm the now hysterical girl. She sobbed into Violets neck and squeezed her eyes shut. “Hey shh, it’s okay,” Violet whispered stroking the back of Pearls blonde curls.

She rocked her from side to side slightly, eventually quieting the girl in her arms. She could feel her heart aching at the sound of Pearls sobs; she didn’t know what Kurtis’ had done but it didn’t matter, not if he had hurt Pearl. How dare he do this to her knowing she was such a kind-hearted person, with one of the purest souls Violet had ever had the pleasure of encountering. Violet swallowed the lump in her throat and clenched her jaw in anger, before lifting Pearl’s head to meet her eyes. They glistened with tears, the moonlight reflecting off of them. She rubbed her thumb across Pearls cheek and caught the tears that were still involuntarily spilling.

“Come on,” Violet said her hand sliding down Pearl’s arm to meet with her hand. She lightly held her fingertips, before Pearl laced their finger together fully. Although she was looking at Violet, her eyes were somewhere else, somewhere distant as if unable to be in this moment with her. She walked to the other side of Violets car, which had its roof up this time, and sat down on the passenger’s seat. “Pearl, you’re shaking,” Violet said after entering the car, her voice filled with concern. Pearl stared down at her hands, a few tears dropping onto her bare legs. Suddenly Violet got back out of the car and walked round to the back, before opening the trunk and retrieving an old blanket. Once she was back in the car, Pearl was now sitting with one knee drawn to her chest, the other crossed beneath her. Violet placed the blanket next to her “It’s not the cutest thing I own, but it comes in handy,” She explained trying to lighten the mood. Pearl rested her head back and turned to look at Violet. She whispered a small thank you and slowly began to wrap the rough material around her as Violet started up the car.

They’d been driving for a while and Pearl still hadn’t said anything. She’d stopped crying which was enough for Violet; she didn’t think she could bare to see Pearl be upset for much longer without tracking Kurtis down, and she still didn’t even know what had happened. “I saw Trixie and Katya tonight,” Violet jumped a little as the silence boke. “They were quite friendly with each other if I’m honest,” Pearl continued, still gazing out the window.

“Friendly? How so,” Violet replied, trying to not seem a little impatient as Pearl changed the subject to avoid the elephant in the room, or more specifically the car. “Well, Trixie kissed her so…” She trailed off expecting Violet to be as shocked as she was. But Violet simply nodded and waited for Pearl to continue. “Why aren’t you surprised?” She smiled a little at how calm Violet was, wondering how oblivious she had been and for how long. Violet turned and smiled at her

“Well, even from the first time I met them, they are just completely intoxicated by one another – especially Katya,” Pearl turned her head to Violet. She couldn’t help but notice the way the corners of Violets lips were curving up whilst talking. “I mean she’s completely smitten for Trixie and honestly, it’s refreshing seeing a relationship between two people nowadays, where there are genuine emotions involved,” She looked down a little, her eyes meeting with the steering wheel. Pearl noticed her features turn quite solemn for a split second before she shook it off. “Damn I need to get laid,” She muttered under her breathe lightening the mood, and making Pearl let out a small giggle.

Violet turned to smile at the blonde when she caught her eye. For a moment, she could see the Pearl she could recognise; but the shimmer left her eyes shortly after again. “Can I ask you something?” Pearl asked. Violet looked at her again and nodded before returning her eyes to the road. “So, you and Danny…” She continued apprehensively. Violet rolled her eyes and let out a frustrated groan, taking Pearl by surprise. “I swear Pearl, that boy can’t keep his tongue in his mouth!” She shook her head and frowned a little. “Sorry, continue,”

“I think my question was just answered actually,” Pearl let out a small breathy laugh and looked back down to her hand. “You know he’s not that bad. And you did just say you needed some action… All I’m saying is, I don’t know, maybe consider it?” She suggested, although phrased it more as a question. “I don’t doubt he’s a good guy Pearl, in fact I think he’s super funny… most of the time,”

“Then why don’t you give him a chance?” She seemed to have a little more enthusiasm and character in her voice now, which settled Violet. “Has he been speaking to you or something?” Violet sighed.

“Maybe… but stop trying to change the subject!” Pearl looked over to her and raised her eyebrows.

“Listen, Danny is great and all but… he’s… not my type,” Violet was struggling to phrase it. She wasn’t uncomfortable with her sexuality, and she didn’t think she would struggle to talk about it until it actually came to telling her best friend. Suddenly she was filled with fear because, well, she didn’t know if Pearl would be okay with it. The fact that her two other female friends were dating each other boded well in her situation, but she knew what straight girls were like; the moment they found out she was into girls they treated her like she was some sort of predator, and that she’d jump at them at any point – which in this case was mildly true, but before anything else Pearl was her friend and that was more important than some crush.

“Is it because he smokes weed? Because you know I do too,” Pearl said matter-of-factly. Violet turned to her with a sarcastic expression on her face, as if she had said the most obvious thing in the world. She smiled and bit her bottom lip. “I’m just not into guys like him…” She began before taking a long breathe and continuing before Pearl could talk. “Or guys for that matter,” He heart raced in anticipation. She began to park her car on the edge of the road when Pearl replied. “Oh…” That’s it? That’s all she can say? “Listen–,” Violet began, before Pearl interrupted.

“Sorry I kept pushing it,” She said quietly looking at Violet. Violets chest visibly deflated as she was washed with relief. “Am I like a magnet for gay people or something? Because I mean first it was Katya, who to be fair is bisexual, and apparently now Trixie who I wouldn’t have suspected was gay and I’ve known her since we were little,” She began to come to life again, and Violet couldn’t help but smile and let out a little giggle at how confused Pearl was. “And I just so happened to be the first friend you made when you got here so,” She was shaking her head in exaggerated confusion, her eyes wide and a smile growing on her face. They both laughed at her for a moment before Pearl caught herself in the side mirror.

“Oh, my god! I look awful!” Pearl exclaimed and began trying to wipe away the damp black smudges that had formed beneath her eyes. “Well at least we agree on one thing,” Violet muttered under her breathe. Pearl let out a laugh, which was a lot for her seeing as no less than 10 minutes ago she was almost entirely unresponsive, despite Violets attempts as comfort. “Do you want me to walk you in?” Violet asked sincerely. Pearl gave her a soft smile before shaking her head lightly. “it’s okay, I don’t really want my mom asking questions so I’ll probably just try and slip in as quietly as I can,”

She leaned over and gave violet a kiss on the cheek before wrapping her arms around her neck. “Thank you, you didn’t need to come,” She whispered as if to keep her graciousness between them, even though there didn’t appear to be anyone around. Violet hugged her back and leaned her head against Pearls affectionately. “It’s not that big of a deal, really, I mean what’s the point of having a car if I don’t use it,” She laughed a little, thinking it was ridiculous that Pearl could ever think she wouldn’t want to help. “No but it’s more than that,” Pearl continued and pulled away to look Violet in the eye. “You didn’t ask questions, because you didn’t need to! I will tell you… just not tonight. I don’t want to ruin this moment,” Suddenly they were in Pearls room again and Violet was being brought back to 3 days ago. All the emotions and tension between the two of them, engulfing the intimacy between them. She moved one of her hand that was resting on Pearl’s waist and held onto Pearl’s arm, which was still draped lazily around her shoulder. Her thumb slowly stroked along the girl’s skin as she contemplated what to do. Pearl was right, it was too special of a moment to ruin with feelings getting in the way. All she did was simply smile and winked at her before reminding her that her mom was waiting.

Pearl leaning in and placed another delicate kiss upon the tip of Violets nose, making her lightly blush and giggle at how sweet it was. “I’ll call you tomorrow okay?” Violet naturally nodded to Pearl, who had now gotten out of the car and was leaning down to look at her. She closed the door and ran up to her house. Before she entered she turned back and waved Violet off, signalling for her to drive away into the night feeling giddy with a concoction of happiness, relief, and slight confusion still.

—–

Trixie was in Pearl’s room with her, as she had walked over to talk about what had happened the previous night. Pearl was still wrapped up in her bedsheets, refusing to use Sunday as anything other than a day as complete comfort and relaxation. In contrast Trixie was sitting upright in the desk chair, head to toe in pink (as usual), with a full face of makeup and her hair perfectly styled – despite it being 9 am.

“So… You’re probably wondering why we didn’t tell you,” She seemed uncomfortable talking about it, almost as if she never wanted Pearl to find out. “If it was up to me I’d have told you every detail, but for some reason Katya wanted to keep it under wraps,”

“You do realise you haven’t actually said it? I’ve kind of had to put two and two together,” She was annoyed, and rightfully so. And to make Trixie feel even worse, wasn’t trying to keep it a secret. Pearl sat up and looked at Trixie head on. “Okay fine! Katya and I are… dating,” She sighed and flopped back onto the chair. “And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I just… we didn’t know how you were going to react,” She gave a pleading look to Pearl, who still looked aggravated – whether from the situation, or the fact she had been woken up to talk about the situation, she couldn’t decide. “Trix, I love you and Katya like you’re my fucking family members… I’m hurt you couldn’t trust me with this,”

They fell silent for a while, with Katya staring down at her nails before fiddling with them, and Trixie slumped in Pearls desk chair, gazing over to her. “Pearl, you know it’s not…” She paused and leaned over to pull Katya’s hand apart in frustration. “Stop, you know I hate it when you do that! You’ll ruin your nails,” Trixie exclaimed and Pearl laughed a little with Trixie soon joining. “So… are we cool? Please say we are,” Pearl rolled her eyes comically before nodding.

“Sure, just please don’t keep something as big as this from me again, because it sucks,” Trixie nodded before announcing she had to leave and gave Pearl a hug. “Damn Pearl, I love you but you need to go shower,” She said in disgust before pulling away and contorting her face. Pearl frowned in offense before swatting Trixie’s arm. “What?! So now you want me to keep things from you?” She said laughing. “Later Pearl,” When she had left, Pearl fell back onto her bed again and picked up her phone.

From: Violet 💜

Hey Pearl, I just wanted to say thank you for last night – For being so accepting that is. I’ve had difficult experiences with this stuff in the past, to say the least. And of course, you didn’t have to be that kind with it but you were and having my best friend give that response means a lot more to me than I will show. It’s currently 12:30 and it’s on my mind so I felt it was only appropriate to thank you, as I’m not sure I’d be able to articulate it quite as well if it were in person (Not that I’m doing that good of a job over text either!). Also, if on the odd chance I have to beat up Kurtis, I have a pair of heels I’ve been meaning to get rid of and they’d make the perfect weapon… just saying😉 xxx

Before Pearl knew it, she was texting back, purely typing out of instinct.

To: Violet 💜

Do you want to come to mine today? We could just chill and watch movies all day, I think my mom got called into work this morning, so she’ll let me order takeout. It’s cool if you don’t want to or you have plans… I just really want to see you xxx

She didn’t know what it was, but she felt comforted whenever she was with Violet; way more than she did with Kurtis last night, and even sometimes Trixie and Katya – especially now that they were a couple. And her heart was still swelling from the sincerity within Violet’s message. It made her curious, though, as to what she was referring to when she spoke about her past. No matter how desperate she was to know, she knew she shouldn’t ask her out of respect particularly after the way Violet was last night.

She had heard her mom get up earlier than she usually did and there’s the faint memory of her saying goodbye, but she couldn’t be sure because she was still a little half asleep. She rubbed her eyes and looked around her room at the bombshell that had gone off last night. Her clothes were scattered across the room, her skirt however was neatly folded on her desk chair, presumably by Trixie. She sighed as she saw her converse thrown to the side, and remembered she’d left her boots in Kurtis’ car. Perhaps she could speak to him tomorrow about everything; the more it played on her mind the stupider she felt. Shaking her from her frustrated thoughts was a buzz she heard from her phone beneath the covers.

From: Violet 💜

THANK GOD YOU ASKED ME THAT!!! I need to get away from my dad, if I have to hear one more lecture about college I’m going to scream xxx

To: Violet 💜

You only have like a few more months left, right? Xxx

From: Violet 💜

Yeah, but at this rate, I’ll probably get held back a year I’m so behind on everything… your school goes in hard!! xxx

To: Violet 💜

Okay ew, can we stop talking about school? Just get your butt over here, I need hugs xxx

Pearl sighed at the thought of Violet leaving after knowing her for such a short time. She wasn’t sure if the feeling was returned, but she was so drawn to her in a way that she’d never felt with anyone before. It kind of scared her, sure, and she prepared herself for the worst many times; Violet going off to a college in another state, and forgetting all about their short interaction with each other. She knew she was being silly, of course, with only knowing the girl for such a short space of time. Before she could worry even further she heard the doorbell ring. Damn, that was fast!

She looked in the mirror before running her fingers through her tousled curls. She wasn’t sure why she was trying to improve her appearance, she’d literally drooled in front of Violet before so it’s not like she’d keeping up impressions. She ran down the stair and pulled her shirt a little further over her shorts so her thighs were mostly covered. When she opened her door, expecting those warm eyes and dark red lips, but was met with silence she was a little startled. She looked around to see if she could spot the phantom knocker but there was nothing. Just as she was closing the door she noticed a flash of red in the corner of her eye. She opened the door again and looked down to find the bear from last night perched on top of a slender box, and her shoes with a note leaning against it.

Her heart raced a little as she quickly gathered her things from the doorstep and retreated back inside. Pearl placed her shoes by the door step and the rest of the gifts on her kitchen counter and just stood there to try and calm her breathing. It wasn’t the kind of breathing you got when you were excited, or nervous even – she was feeling panicky and she wasn’t sure why. She didn’t want to admit it but she was scared to see him again. She didn’t want to feel like she did last night, she didn’t want to have to think about it, about the thoughts that ran through hr mind or the way his eyes were filled with animalistic hunger and not passion or care – she just didn’t want to! She closed her eyes but was startled by the doorbell again.

Pearl gingerly walked over to the door and took a few deep breathes before turning the handle only to be met with what she was hoping for, the first time. Violet was standing there with a small smile on her face, and a dangerous amount of chocolate in her hands. “I though seeing as you were providing the main course, I’d bring dessert,” She laughed a little before her smile dropped. “Pearl are you okay?” Pearl nodded a little before smiling. She felt herself deflate a little with relief as she pulled Violet into a hug and lead her inside. She knew she wasn’t very convincing but Violet wasn’t going to ask questions.

“If I’d have known you were still in your pyjama’s I wouldn’t’ve bothered getting changed! I literally only put on clothes for this so you better be grateful,” Pearl noted that Violet did look quite casual today, with her usual dark eyes and red lips swapped for a semi-bare face, and her hair was up in a ponytail and her baby hair were carelessly falling from the loose restraint. “You can borrow some of mine if you need to,”

“Are you sure you’re alright? I’m sorry if I sound forward but you just seem kind of… distracted,” Pearl shook her head a little and looked down before groaning and walking into the kitchen. Violet followed her quickly and straight away noticed the presents she had received. “Ooooh who’s the lucky lady?” She said picking up the bear. “Me apparently, they’re from Kurtis,” She replied with little enthusiasm before jumping up and sitting on the counter top. Violet immediately tossed the toy onto the side with a look of disgust. She was mildly happy that she now had a reason to visibly hate Kurtis, even if she didn’t know what that reason was. “You didn’t have these with you last night?”

“Yeah, I think he dropped them at my doorstep a little before you got here,” Pearl sighed again, as Violet hopped onto the counter next to her. “You wanna talk about it yet? If not I can totally continue blindly hating him, like, that’s not an issue,” Pearl laughed a little and shook her head, heaviness suddenly engulfing her chest. She began to retell the event that had happened last night, becoming more uncomfortable by the second but she knew she had to do it.

When she had finished, Violet put her hand on Pearls knee comfortingly but she couldn’t help but notice the way it immediately calmed her. “Pearl I… I don’t know what…” Violet looked just as heartbroken as Pearl did last night. “It’s okay I don’t expect you to. I know I made a big deal out of nothing, and I’m being such a baby reacting like this… It’s… It’s dumb, forget it ever happened,” She dismissed it and jumped off the counter.

“Wait, Pearl you’re kidding, right?” Violet frowned at the blonde in confusion and a little frustration. “Don’t you dare say you were being stupid for wanting boundaries! He is in the wrong here – he’s the one who pushed you, he’s the one who didn’t consider how you were feeling, HE’S the one who’s a complete dick for what he did!” Her voiced had unconsciously risen a little, and Pearl began cowering back a little. She immediately felt guilt wash over her whole body. Her palms began to sweat and her eyes glazed over with tears at seeing how she had made Pearl so scared. “Oh my god what’s wrong with me,” She said under her breathe. “Pearl I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to get that angry I just… Guys like him don’t deserve the kindness you have, and it pisses me off because he’s gonna go through life thinking he can get everything,” She moved towards Pearl and held both of her hands. “Sorry doesn’t even cover what just happened to be honest… I shouldn’t have reacted so harshly and insensitively and…”

“What?” Pearl looked up to meet with Violets eyes after she didn’t finish her sentence.

“Just please forgive me… I don’t want you to think you can’t tell me shit like this because of how I’ll react I just… I didn’t trust him and I was so hoping I’d get proven wrong because I saw how much you liked him,” Pearl smiled a little before taking Violet’s hands and wrapping them around her back before she did the same around the brunette’s shoulders. “Can we order food now,” She heard Violet whine from beneath her, as she leaned her head against the other girl’s.

—-

45 minutes later their food had arrived. “Where do you want to eat?” Pearl said before interrupting the girl before she could answer “Oh! Wait! I want to show you something… oh and bring the chocolate,” She said with excitement before running up the stairs with their Chinese food in hand. Violet quickly followed, arms full of chocolate.

“Okay so this is kind of more my meditation spot, but I guess we can eat Chinese food and watch trashy movies here as well!” She held Violets hand and led her through to her room. “I don’t get it?” She said staring around her room. Pearl ignored her and stood on her bed, before pulling up her blinds and opening the window. “Come on,” She said beckoning her forward, as she was perched half in and half out of the window. Violet hesitantly followed and was shocked at how set up everything was. On top on the roof was a blanket rolled out, with fairy lights, much like the ones in Pearl’s room, hanging across the walls.

She watched as Pearl went over to retrieve a basket full of what appeared to be more blankets and too many cushions to count before scattering a few without order across the roof. “I don’t show a lot of people this, so you should feel honoured,” She said before leaning back into her room and retrieving her laptop, and then dragging her duvet through the window pane with slight struggle. She spread it out across the ‘floor’ on top of the blanket which already out, and perched herself on it with her laptop in front. “Okay, what movie do you want?” She asked looking up at violet who was still a little taken aback by Pearl’s secret escape. “Umm,” She thought, before sitting down beside her and reaching over to grab her noodles. “I think, in the spirit of being teenage girls in high school, the only obvious choice would be Clueless,” She continued with a sly grin. Pearl giggled agreeing enthusiastically with her friend before setting it up.

—–

Almost 2 hours later and the entirety of their Chinese food completely gone, the two girls were now snuggling up beneath the blankets the sun beginning to set around them and the light of Pearl’s laptop shining onto their faces. “I’m telling you, I’m going to bring the phrase ‘totally buggin’ back!” Pearl exclaimed giggling. Her and Violet were now lying down facing each other, their heads rested on a stack of cushions. “I just can’t see it!” Violet replied stubbornly trying to fight the smile that was tempting her.

Pearl had brought the covers up to her nose to try and hide her grin, and although perhaps it was too much for Violet’s heart to handle, she couldn’t bring herself to look away. Before she could process it, Pearl pulled her whole under the covers and leaned forward to rest it on Violets chest, beneath her chin. Violet felt her shaking slightly and she began to worry, fearful to meet with teary eyes but soon heard small giggles. She soon found herself involuntarily joining in, not sure what they were laughing at, but couldn’t control the giggles erupting from her mouth. She rested her head on top of Pearl’s and closed her eyes, still laughing, before reaching her hand to link with Pearl’s under the blanket. This is what it should be like, she thought, this is what Pearl deserves – to be happy, filled with unexplainable laughter. The thought of her feeling anything else made her heart ache.

“Hey Pearl?” She said after a while. Pearl poked her head up, to look at Violet. They were extremely close now, and she could see the different slivers of brown in her eyes. Some of Pearl’s blonde locks had been swept across her face, so she tried to blow them out of her face before eventually giving up, causing Violet to laugh again. “Why are we laughing?” She said snorting. Pearl shook her head and smirked before burring her face back into Violets chest. “You tell me, I’m in a weird mood,” She sighed against Violet’s bare neck, causing goose bumps to raise.

She noticed how fast Violet’s heart was beating under her cheek, and was curious as to why hers was matching. Her mind shot back to the previous night, and how she was in a similar position; pressed up against someone, sharing breathe with racing pulses. Except this time, she wasn’t scared… she wasn’t filled with anxiety and panic and she wasn’t overthinking every move; it was natural for her. Perhaps it’s just because we’re friends, she thought trying to avoid the obvious questions clawing at the back of her mind. She shut her eyes, trying not to focus on the moment, rather than the confusing herself further than she already was.

“Okay, but that doesn’t answer my question,” Violet said breaking Pearl from her thoughts. She looked up again but in confusion this time. Violet brought their hands up from under the blanket and fiddled with Pearl fingers slightly, making her chest feel light as if filled with everything soft in the world. “You’re always in a weird mood, so like,” She said with a smirk, concentrating on the other girl’s hand. Pearl suddenly started giggling quietly again to which Violet responded with an overexaggerated eyeroll. “I don’t know whether to take that as a compliment or an insult!” Pearl continued.

Violet looked up from their hands to connect with her eyes before saying flatly “Both,”. Pearl giggled more and somehow managed to get even closer to Violet, draping her arm across the dip in her waist; as if it was second nature. She couldn’t avoid the fact that it felt so natural to be in this position with Violet, and she didn’t know whether that should be something playing on her mind or not. When she had calmed down, she finally decided to speak; not being someone to usually beat around the bush.

“Vi can I talk to you about something?” She asked in a quiet voice. Violet nodded a little, noticing how gentle and small Pearl had suddenly become. “Okay, just please don’t freak out, or get scared… please,”

“Of course… Pearl what is it?” the tone had suddenly gotten serious, and Pearl had moved her glance away from Violets eyes. “Okay so last night,” She said before sitting up, and pulling a blanket up to wrap around herself. “When he kissed me… I like, didn’t feel anything,” She began to speak with so much hesitation, as if she was ashamed of her confession. “Like obviously, it was good… I guess but-,”

She stopped and looked down at Violet who was leaning on her elbows looking up at her. The curve of her breasts becoming more evident as the tight restraints of her shirt were being tested. Pearl couldn’t help but let her eyes and her mind wander. She looked at the way Violet’s lips naturally pouted and wondered what it would be like to kiss them; would they be soft, or would Violets easy dominance come through. She wanted to feel them on her own, and she wanted to know what I felt like to let them roam around her body. She wanted to feel Violets careful hands feel every inch of her and she wasn’t afraid to admit that to herself. It was strange – she could see herself becoming more comfortable with it ever since she had met the girl. Pearl felt kind of stupid for taking so long to realise; she’s been fascinated with Violet since day one… and she was now realising why, no matter how much she tried to push it down and think about Kurtis.

Her graceful curls tumbling down her back leaving her clavicle bare. Pearl wanted to run her hair through the dark waves, caress the back of her neck. Her breathe was getting faster, and was caught in her throat.

“But what, Pearl?” Violet’s gentle voice broke her from her daydream. She swallowed the lump in her throat before looking at her hands again, fiddling with a loose thread on the blanket. “I couldn’t put my whole self into it, you know? I felt like I was doing it more for him, to prove a point and to get over this stupid feeling of being a loser just because I’d never kissed anyone,”

“So you didn’t like it? Is that what you’re worried about?” Violet asked, now sitting up to face Pearl.

“It’s more of, why didn’t I like it,” She began, “Like, I was on a date with the most popular guy in school, and he was totally lovely, and sweet and considerate and kind, and all I was thinking about was when was it going to become fun; like the way everyone else describes it,” She looked up at Violet who was still a little perplexed. “And then I called you…” She trailed off moving a little closer “And you took all the anxiety and self-deprecation away from me, and you made me feel calm and relaxed because I was being myself, and I didn’t have to impress you because… you already liked me for me,”

They were unbearably close by now, and Pearl’s heart raced just like it had the night before, except this time, it wasn’t caused by worry but more excitement and anticipation.

“And I couldn’t help but notice how much more happiness and comfort I felt just now… being close to you,” She said barely above a whisper.

Violet’s head was spinning. It was just like it had been a few nights before and Violet was preparing herself for a let down again, despite all that Pearl had said. She could feel Pearl’s shaking breathe upon her skin, and her cheeks flushed in embarrassment of how worked up she was getting. She felt Pearl’s cold hand slip into her own, and glanced down at Pearl’s lips. “Vi…” She whispered, Bringing the other girls eyes back to reconnect with her own. “Kiss me…” She breathed out, placing her other hand on Violet’s arm as if to steady herself.

Violet made sure to do it slowly, so that she could savour every part of this; the thing she had been anticipating since the first time she saw Pearl. She gripped Pearl’s hand a little tighter before lightly touching their lips together to begin with. It wasn’t until Pearl was the one to make a more forceful response, that Violet knew it was okay to continue. Pearls lips were soft and they melded well against Violets plump one’s. Pearl let go of Violets arm, before moving her hand to the back of her neck to deepen the kiss. Their mouths moved together in a delicate serenity.

Pearl’s heart was beating too fast for her to be paying attention to it, as she felt Violets hand move around her waist and squeeze slightly before moving to her back. Violet began to pull them closer together, before Pearl responded by straddling Violets lap, still holding onto Violets shoulder and gripping her hand, refusing to let go. She was taken aback slightly at how comfortable she was with Violet, considering the night before she was in a similar scenario yet felt the need to escape.

They pulled apart after a while to catch their breath. Pearl rested her head against Violet’s as she stroked her dark hair away from her blushing face. She tried to comprehend what had happened but she was so overwhelmed with happiness and a little bit of guilt that she couldn’t help but bite her lip back in an attempt to tame her giddy smile.

Violet had no hesitation as a toothy grin spread across her lips. “You have no idea how long I’ve waited for you to do that,” She whispered, letting out a giggle before caressing her hand from Pearls back to the top of her thigh, just below her hip. Pearl grinned back and kissed the tip of Violets nose, just like she had done the night before except this time allowing a much-needed feeling of joy to spread across her chest.

#columbia #pearlet #not afraid anymore #pearl liaison #violet chachki #lesbian au #trixie mattel #rpdr fanfiction #submission #high school au

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aberorca · 7 years

Text

The Letter to the Palace

This was written down on 11 pages of lined paper yesterday, and given to stage door before the final performance:

To the cast and crew and creators of Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, to the delightful front-of-house (elves), to staff and security at the Palace Theatre,

Thank you.

I put off writing this letter for a long time simply because I worried that my words on paper would not be articulate enough to accurately illustrate the sincerity of what I feel in my heart. Now, here I am, churning out thoughts so that you all might receive them before the end of today - 21st of May.

I grew up with Harry Potter. I read the first book as an eight year-old and when the last book was published in 2007, I read Harry turning 17, just as I turned 17. Throughout my childhood and adolescence, every year there was a new Harry Potter book or film with the result that my peers and I spent much of our lives at Hogwarts, in one form or another. It is as much of a home for us as it is for Harry, Ron and Hermione. As an adult, I sometimes pick up the books again in nostalgia but more significantly, the books are where I retreat to in the darkest periods of my life. When I have been lost, when I have felt bereft of hope and light, I have gone home to Hogwarts.

Naturally, Cursed Child was a must-see for me, though it was with some trepidation that I arrived at the Palace for the very first time nine months ago, for so much was the personal importance to me of these stories and these characters that the execution of an eighth story was paramount. I need not have been nervous. The very moment that Harry, Ginny, Ron and Hermione walked out on stage, I felt the most uncanny, jubilant jolt of recognition. So incredible are this cast in their roles that there was an instant sense of familiarity. It was as if the characters had simply walked out of the epilogue of Deathly Hallows and onto the stage and it was like suddenly laying eyes on an old friend, not seen for ten years - that feeling one has as one gasps, a smile spreading from ear-to-ear, “Oh, my goodness, there you are!” That first moment was one I’ll never forget. I suddenly knew that my worries were unnecessary. It was the start of a theatre addiction.

For that first show, I came on my own having scraped a lucky return on the website. I sat between two young women, each of whom had come on their own. While waiting for the story to begin, we were all very British and sat with our elbows tucked in, not daring to start conversation, or, worst of all, accidentally touch the other person (I brushed arms with someone on the Tube the other day and we both instantly recoiled in horror). Then, the play started. After the first act, at the drop of the interval, reticence and diffidence had been completely blown away; we all turned to look at each other, elation across our faces and said in unison, “Oh, my GOD!” For the next few hours we were suddenly friends, babbling in disbelief about the wizardry we’d just experienced. An American chap sitting behind me joined in, confessing that he was just in London on business and knew nothing of Harry Potter. I lent him my programme with its summary of the first seven stories and he thanked me and started passing around sweets (sweets - they always help you make friends).

The sense of community among a Cursed Child audience is something I’ve experienced nowhere else. Something about Potter brings people together. On every viewing of the play I have met Potterheads young and old, from first-time theatregoers to true thespians. I have made friends who I have kept in touch with and who I hope I will be able to watch West End shows with for years to come (and not just Cursed Child). Indeed, we have all organised to be at the final performance of the original Cursed Child cast on May 21st. We’ll all be going to dinner and sharing stories and laughs and I am more excited about this than anything else. One friend made at Cursed Child, who I went with to see The Exonerated starring Jamie and Chris, has promised to give me a proper theatrical education, after I told her, truthfully, that aside from a solid upbringing on Shakespeare which my Mother insisted on, Cursed Child was the first play I’d seen (as you can imagine, it blew my perception of theatre wide open). My friend was appalled to hear this and intends to remedy it. I, myself have already started booking other shows, from Hamilton, to Kneehigh’s Tristan & Yseult.

I think part of the familial atmosphere among a Cursed Child audience stems from the themes of the play. Personally, I’ve never found a story so relatable. I know what it is to grieve for a parent never known and to struggle to connect with another. I grieve for surrogate parents known, loved, but lost. I know what it is to feel unworthy, unable to match legacies placed on my shoulders by my ancestry. Expectation followed me all through childhood, adolescence, and life as a young adult. I’ve never matched it; the achievements expected of me were never reached and it only grew insecurity, resentment and stretched my relationship with my sole parent to breaking point. I struggle with who I am versus who everyone thought or thinks I should be.

My boarding school was my home, and my closest friends are my family. They would do anything for me. They are people I would die for and crucially, who I stay alive for. Cursed Child reinforces that love, loyalty and friendship is everything and you are rich as long as you have those things. When I go to see the play and I see Albus bearing the burdens I bear, Harry grieving as I grieve, Scorpius bumbling through his days just as I do, parents and children struggling with each other as I do with mine, it gives me strength and comfort and my feelings of isolation ebb away. It is as if the cast and creatives are reaching out a hand, taking mine and holding it for the journey.

I have taken as many people as possible to see the play with me, including my best friend, who also has problems with a parent. I confided in her that every time I see the play it gives me hope. It makes me want to keep going with my Mum, to try harder. “Yeah,” she agreed. “It makes me want to try harder with my Dad.”

The fact is, one would be hard-pressed to find an audience member who can’t relate to something in Cursed Child. There is something there that everyone can understand. Sitting in a room of 1400 people who are all accompanying you on your voyage through troubled and fickle waters , feeling as you feel, is a powerful and deeply moving experience. Its impact cannot be overstated.

I’ve been asked why I have seen Cursed Child so many times - what it is that draws me back again and again. I generally respond by first asking the enquirer how much time they have.

In all seriousness, the answers are many. What I described above is a significant reason but there are others. Visually, I’ve never seen anything so spectacular in the human world. The lighting is beautiful, yet subtle. The set is incredible - the movement to create the forest transfixes me every time. The choreography (Steven Hoggett, you’re brilliant; my favourite piece of choreography being the opening of Act Three) and the transitions between scenes are something I never tire of. The magic is enthralling (shout-out to Jamie Harrison) The performances are sublime. The cast slips into character so effortlessly and bring such powerful emotion to the table every night - I don’t know how they do it. But the thing I love most, the thing that gives me a high like nothing else, is watching the people around me see the show for the first time.

There is a moment, once Chris Jarman’s voice has brought a hush over the audience, when the train engine kicks into gear and you can feel every hair in the audience stand on end and every body in the room quivers with anticipation. I once sat next to a 50-something woman who was there with her 20-something daughter and as the lights dropped and the train carried us away, the elder woman raised trembling fingertips to her lips as her daughter took a deep inhale. They didn’t know what they were about to see but they knew it was going to be something extraordinary. I love watching people laugh. I love listening to the gasps at the magic and the reveals of information. I know when someone wipes a tear from their eye but then smiles in the next moment, that they have had their hand held, just as I did mine. I love that the 70-somethings behind me have all the same reactions as the eight-year old in front of me, their sense of wonder equal. I love watching people experience joy, joy in its purest of forms.

It’s a level of joy I’ve never seen from people before. From the very moment they step inside the theatre doors, you can see people being taken away. Their excitement mounts and their minds open up. Parents are as exhilarated as children, and indeed some of the parents were children themselves when Potter entered their lives. Suddenly the troubles of Muggle life have fallen away behind them, left outside on Shaftesbury Avenue. They are temporarily relieved of the woes of the ordinary as they behold the extraordinary unfolding in front of their eyes, enraptured as they are reunited with characters and stories they love, stories so powerful and characters so familiar that they are real.

Going back to Hogwarts is simply a family reunion of epic proportions. There is not a negative word to be heard, not a cynic in the building. Watching people watch the show, you see them experience true happiness, an exultation so powerful that it bursts out of them to be spread out with the people next to them. You can’t not share the experience of Cursed Child with those around you. It inspires too much emotion to be contained within oneself. It brings out the best in people. It brings out generosity, and candid expression. It removes boundaries and allows branches of conversation and hands of friendship to extend.

And love is, ultimately, what it’s all about. It’s what elates the audience most of all. It’s what they relate to. It’s what they feel. For at Hogwarts there is no place for politics or woes, for disagreements or petty prejudices. And the Palace Theatre has become Hogwarts. The front-of-house staff are delightful and always up for a geek-out over the show (shout-out to Leo). The security are full of smiles. With every step into the theatre you take, you are welcomed with open arms, no matter creed nor colour nor religion, nor origin. Everyone is welcome at Hogwarts. Just as the Potter books are my light in the darkness, the Palace Theatre has become a tangible accompaniment to my literary sanctuary. I can openly grieve with hundreds of other people for those I’ve loved and lost, I can begin to accept that relationships are tricky, they are imperfect and they require work, just like people. I can geek out without embarrassment, I can be guaranteed of a laugh and I can watch as the very best of humanity is brought out on stage and among the audience.

So, thank you. To all the theatre staff, to the incredible creators and crew who brilliantly conjured this show and to the cast, who have taken characters I love and become them, completely and absolutely. Sometimes I wonder if J.K. Rowling ever completely realises what she has done, that is, just how many lives she has changed and affected. Now I wonder the same of you all. You’ve made some of the hardest aspects of my life, of the lives of many, a little easier. You’ve opened the door for me into the world of theatrical entertainment, a world I can’t wait to explore further. You induce a magical euphoria that is unparalleled. In a world where we all have prophecies made of us, where evil still exists and where we all have a Voldemort - a battle we must face; from which we cannot walk away, Cursed Child is there to remind us that we do not fight alone and that where we can come together, there is joy to be found. As strange as it is to love total strangers, I love you all for what you do.

Wishing the very best for all of you,

With love,

A Potterhead (and her dog).

#cursed child #palace theatre #crying all over again

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