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#knowing it’ll just be me
saintaviator · 7 months
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something something gman tommy something something gordon in stasis. you know how it is.
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dozydawn · 2 years
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Mayerling.
Melissa Hamilton and Rupert Pennefather.
Lauren Cuthbertson and Thiago Soares.
Natalia Osipova and Edward Watson.
Melissa Hamilton and Rupert Pennefather.
Natalia Osipova and Edward Watson.
Sarah Lamb and Steven McRae.
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shadowaj · 8 months
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the floof girl with the axe
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yea-baiyi · 10 months
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say what you want about svsss but hands down the most distraught i have ever been while reading a mxtx novel is after the bing-ge extra. what do you mean he asked shen qingqiu to come with him. what do you mean “it’s not fair”. what do you mean he looked back.
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lavendermin · 3 months
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the lovers, reversed | stellaron hunter sunday
pairing | sunday x fem!reader
wc | 1.6k
genre | angst, one sided love, unrealized feelings
warnings | mdni, alcohol mention, brief mention of sex, blood, wounds, unhealthy relationship, spoiler I guess if sunday really does end up being a stellaron hunter (have not yet played 2.3)
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Fresh wounds, a few gashes. Nothing he couldn't treat. Because you wouldn't have anyone else though Firefly has always offered.
"Hold still," Sunday quietly instructs as steady hands work quickly to disinfect and dress unsightly marred skin.
You wince and clutch the sheets until your knuckles turn white. The pain was never easy, but a consequence of your recklessness nonetheless.
Under deft fingers you're all skin, no shame. Not when it's him.
Another whimper you can't suppress escapes your lips, and maybe it finally breaks something in him because you hear him sigh quietly. With his teeth he swiftly pulls off one of his gloves and holds it to your lips.
"Bite down on this," he instructs, voice calm and level. "There's still debris in one of the gashes. I have to take them out one by one."
You can only nod, not registering much else as the pain has your vision tunneling. It's another twenty minutes as he tries to work as quickly as possible. It takes everything to keep his composure despite your muffled cries of discomfort.
"This should have been done in the medical wing." Sunday's reprimand has little to no bite as he clears the medical supplies from the coffee table he had pulled up from across your room.
Your breath is weak and shaky, but still a gentle thing he's used to. "Too bright in there. Makes me feel like a lab rat within those white walls."
"Smells too clean?" he chuckles. Something he can't help around you more recently. There's an innocent and peculiar way you view things. Much like–
Sunday shuts the cabinet in your bathroom a bit harsher than he intended. He can't think of her... not right now. It would only bring emotions he didn't need to process—couldn't process at the moment.
There's red on his hands, on his clothes, staining his once pristine gloves. The awful metallic smell feels like it’s burned into his nostrils—a nauseating mix of crimson and the strong smell of sterilizers as he cleans the tools. His hands work on their own under the running water of your sink, almost out of body as his mind wanders. There’s a slight tremble he catches. Pathetic, he thinks, unable to keep it together in such a dire time.
The 'script' did not mention anything of a necessary death, but of course it would never detail wounds or misfortunes in detail. Some of those just come with the job. And sometimes he would feel a bubbling anger at the twisted fates that often befell you. But he knows it's a spiral that leaves him down a foggy road, one he shouldn't tread on.
Still, you're alive, and he's here. And for now, that's enough.
Your strained voice pulls him back to his body. Back to the present with a clearer head.
Right. The painkillers.
Sunday is quickly back by your side, pushing the small pill past your lips and lifting your face gently to give you water.
"You forgot," you tease despite your hoarse voice.
And those golden eyes you love dearly can't even bear to look at you as he sits next to you on the bed. There's no response other than a halfhearted hum he gives you. You know he didn't forget, and his lack of correction knowing how matter-of-fact he is only further sinks your heart.
But you don't get to tell your heart who to love.
The now-wrinkled glove he gave you is placed next to his leg. "Sorry I messed up. I'll buy you a new pair."
"Thank you..."
"You're wel-"
"You should say ‘thank you’. For the gesture. But don't apologize for the inevitable from missions. What's done is done," Sunday interrupts, voice firm. A little cold.
"I-" You're cut off as he grabs your wrist, his eyes unfocused as he looks at the ground.
"If you had done as I said– You could have gone missing. A lot of things could have gone wrong. Don't use yourself as bait. If anything happens to me, you escape by any means necessary. Understand?"
The grip is a little less than comfortable and you can only nod. Obedient only if it was his words that commanded. It brought a feeling he didn't want to describe rushing through his chest. The way your eyes looked at him—a mix of fear and blind adoration. It made him nauseous to consider himself worthy of such affection.
The morals of why he kept you by his side—of why he sought you during moments of his own damned weakness... He would dwell on that another time. If his morals were in a slow decline, perhaps he would even turn to burn the words stuck in his throat with the liquid he once detested and swore would never stain his lips. The liquid courage might bring him tumbling into your arms, an eagerness to be held and soothed for the sin he feels tainted with.
That maybe in his drunken stupor with his face buried in your neck and his throbbing frustration filling you up, he would realize even in nothingness, there is you. Always you.
A rebound. A close second. A replacement.
Sunday subconsciously has been latching onto you. It’s something he doesn’t remember starting, something he can’t stop nor explain. You, who are like an injured little dove to him, easily hurt and predictable in seeking comfort with his presence.
At first he firmly tried to keep his distance, remain cordial. But now… You provide him some psychological need to keep his same routine from before or have some semblance of familiarity amidst this new path he's been set on. This relationship was just something platonic, he swears by this. Just an innate need to protect and guide you since you were also a clumsy new recruit.
You couldn't help it—falling for him. Slowly being consumed by an infatuation that morphed into a hopeful yearning that filled your chest with a syrupy thickness of strong emotions you were inexperienced with.
And Sunday was at a loss. That wasn't part of the plan. Well…granted he didn't have much of a plan with you. The platonic acquaintance he had built with you was nothing more than for his own gratification. His desperate attempt at normalcy. Someone to fill the void of not being able to see his dear sister.
Still... you're so willing to just give and give and give to him. Anything, for even the slightest possibility of returned affection. Even if you don't outright confess to him, he sees it. In your actions, your speech, your eyes.
Would it truly be so bad to take that which is offered in earnest?
A heart in his hands with nothing to show for it. Lies to himself that this closeness is his attempt to bring you salvation. To settle your heart.
He knows how your script ends, looming over his consciousness. Testing his heart as if he were a newborn god stumbling over his first creation meeting its written demise. Some part of him is too scared to ask if you know it, too. Maybe there's still some naïveté in him if he believes for a second that you don't. A hope that your heart remains innocent and lovely and–
For now Sunday lets you love. It would be a bitter thing to not take the heart you have handed to him.
The painkillers have started to work, your body finally able to sleep for a bit after he changed your soiled sheets from treating your wounds. Before he leaves, Sunday presses his lips to your knuckles and idles for a few moments to watch your steady breathing. Sweat glistens on your brow from the exertion the wound treatment put on your body. Your endurance was nothing to be laughed at.
Sunday doesn't need to turn to know who's outside your door when he leaves.
"Was there something you needed?" The question lacks any warmth.
Kafka chuckles where she leans against the wall, fiddling with a card in her hands. "Here to drop off your compensation for the mission and look after the little lamb," she replies simply, throwing the card to him. He catches it between two fingers. "She lost her phone this past mission so make sure to give her that card for the time being."
Sunday's eyes narrow. "I'm looking after her."
"Poor thing sent me a message asking that I check in on her so she won't bother you. Unless that's a problem?" Her unreadable smile is something Sunday is growing to detest.
"Not necessary. I'll be handling it." His voice is firm, a warning woven into his tone with careful consideration. A natural habit from his years as the head of the Oak Family.
"Really now? If you don't want me looking after her due to trust issues then Bladie can–"
"No." Sunday can feel his heart pounding in his ears, a frustration deep-set in his veins at the pure thought of someone that isn't him near you when you're at your most vulnerable. He wishes he could wipe that smile off Kafka's face. Victim of her teasing again. Remember your composure, a conditioned mind rings. With a clear of his throat, he continues, "No, that won't be necessary. I've already cleared my schedule to ensure her wounds are looked after so there isn't any scarring. I'll take care of it."
Kafka relents and pats his shoulder as she passes him. "Very well, birdie. Sounds like you have our little lamb's heart in your pocket. Or perhaps it's your own?"
Before Sunday can ask her what she means, she's already vanished from his sight. His hand reaches into his jacket pocket when he feels something rigid and pulls out a card he's sure she placed there.
A tarot card depicting a dove perched on a lamb. The lovers.
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stuckinapril · 6 months
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It’s never overstated to me when people are like “work out bc it makes you feel better” bc it literally does. I think what I used to get hung up on is making the perfect schedule / wanting to know what I was doing right away. But it’s also okay to flounder at first and experiment w things and figure out what works for you and your body. The important thing is you’re starting out bc your body really will thank you for it later down the line. You cannot keep pushing it off it will add up
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screampied · 5 months
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Does sex actually feel this good in real life or are people making fan fictions because men in real life dont make you feel THAT good? honest answer please, and this isnt even just a question to you but to everyone. All my friends who have done it were like mehhh its okay and only 2 have actually cummed....
LOL thanks ive been reading fanfics since I was 13 and I have always wondered this!
oh 😭😭😭😭
honestly anon it depends on the partner. sex in real life is actually quite awkward and silly. at least for me, not everything is always so passionate and romantic (it is sometimes according to the mood/setting). fanfictional sex is veryyyy dramatic 🧖‍♀️🧖‍♀️🧖‍♀️🧖‍♀️, especially when he cums, especially that. in my opinion like i said, it depends on the guy because you’ll have both good and bad experiences. if it’s done the right way it feels really good, especially if he knows what he’s doing. talking to him beforehand is good. foreplay helps a lot, way more than people think. i remember one time he coaxed like multiple orgasms out of me at once and i felt like i was ASCENDING. another moment where we both didn’t finish and it was … eh
so yeah, it depends on the guy and fan fiction is quite dramatic + real life sex overall is not that good as it is in fanfics 😭
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neo91502 · 16 days
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@tiredsmashbros had a silly idea with just tsb stretching over smg4 and purposely poking his shoulder while he’s working (i kept thinking “he’s right behind me, isn’t he?”)
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then without the text !! (it says “Heyy, watcha doin’ there, 4?” incase my handwriting got a bit unreadable)
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i hope this man doesn’t come after me next. I fear it’d be joever for me if it would happen. will try to throw dr pepper at him if possible and Not let him in as much as possible
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rakiah · 1 year
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Woohoo! I finally finished this little game <3
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uhbasicallyjustmilex · 9 months
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editing a 16,000 word chapter: a moodboard
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puppyeared · 10 months
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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paragal · 1 year
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Day 8: stand for the flag!
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financeprincess · 1 year
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By next year I really will have everything… graduated from college. In a new home, in a new city that I love. Working a dream job of mine. Starting a business. Paying off the rest of my debt, saving, investing (almost entirely on autopilot). Increasing my credit score to 750+. Buying real estate. Traveling. Building up multiple streams of income, many of them passive. Volunteering more. Pursuing my hobbies. Working out every single day. Getting top of the line beauty treatments and procedures done. Goal weight and body goals reached. New high quality, classy, tailored clothing and beautiful accessories. Acquiring multiple citizenships/passports. Attending upscale events. Hanging out in interesting places with other successful go getters. In a relationship with a man who spoils me, adores me, ravishes me, makes my life easier, and gets me everything I want.
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simcardiac-arrested · 23 days
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wait, that elias?
#huge shoutout to @sepezzz elias design this is very much inspired by it. go look at it#im so serious if i never draw another person manspreading in a fucking office chair it’ll be TOO SOON#anyways.#the juxtaposition truly is crazy hahaaha right people change in the weirdest of ways#i like thinking about how they both present themselves. elias understands he works at Important Academic Research Facility so he still#sooort of tries to look somewhat official. but well he also gets away with what he can#he has that vibe of Yeah i work here and im kind of important but i’m chill. i know how to chill#meanwhile that other freak is just like i am going to make this body look presentable or so help me god.#he’s the Head of the Institute he can no longer have whimsy okay. and listen it’s not because i think jonah is that boring and would#dislike piercings and funny socks or whatever. i think he’d like those. but see he needs to make this believable that elias truly has#changed okay. and also like i said he is the Head of the Institute he needs to look Super Normal And Unremarkable#anyways i think it’s funny how elias’ whole thing is that he tries to distance himself from his family image and tries really hard to Not#end up like a rich asshole. and then. well.#(looks around) So i think about this man a normal amount.#i could write like 20 thinkpieces on both of them but instead they’re gonna make me do college essays about like language and shit.#myart#the magnus archives#tma#elias bouchard#oh my god it is actually un fucking believable how much i think about him every day#if this becomes a daily elias blog yall will just have to deal
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what-even-is-thiss · 6 months
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gen4grl · 23 days
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you would think after all the yapping i do about these losers i would have a plethora of art uploaded … no… so here is my first kantrio post lol
i did these over the last month while watching the olympic weightlifting and jamming to kpop (stan red velvet and kiss of life BTW!!!)
#pokemon#pkmn#trainer red#rival blue#trainer leaf#i made them classy and smoke from a joint idk maybe i should of done the classic aussie teen experience and make them smoke from a water#bottle bong 🤩 red is a massive foodie so ofc he has the multiple options of snacks ready lol my go-to fried food was a capriccosia pizza 😭#i’m always conflicted on the blue smoking hc (just cigarettes yall lol) i often see fanart of professor blue smoking and i see the vision#50/50??? let me ask the audience 🗣️ i think i’m bias cause i am cursed with thinking men who smoke are extremely attractive lmao#there is 100% lore behind that second piece but i am so burnt out and i don’t think it’ll fit in tags lol#also just have a raging fear of sharing anything kantrio related LOL like raging projectile vomiting level anxiety#blue fears repeating the toxic cycles he grew up in but oops he’s doing exactly that in the second piece 🧐#wowzers … as kieran would say lol … i love writing and thinking about blue and his emotional growth over those 3 years red was missing#but hey sometimes something hurts so badly it takes you back to that sad and scared child version of yourself right?#strength to me is like: red >>>>>>> leaf >> blue🤷🏻‍♀️ they technically both canonically beat blue in gamecanon so … my girl is strong sorry#ain’t standing shy timid leaf in this house …#also - despite being acespec myself i didn’t know demi was under the ace umbrella! i think it suits red super well imo :p#pan aswell bc i don’t think he gaf 😭 also shout out to one of my fave pkmn artists kiriato 🫶🏻🤧 i was going through such bad art block and#their work inspired all of these :3 i love their stuff sm espcially their comics 🥹 i drew all of these using their brush sets too!!!#trainer blue#blue pokemon#red pokemon#leaf pokemon#pokemon art#pokemon fanart#pokemon frlg#trainer green#rival green#my art <3#kanto au
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