#lane FUCKS

[frownyalfred]

Enough with Lois being flattered and seduced by Bruce Wayne. I want Clark blushing like a school girl every time Bruce gets within ten feet, and Lois wants to know why.

So of course she sleeps with him. Mostly to prove to Clark that Wayne isn’t all that and a bag of snacks. A little bit because hey, Wayne isn’t exactly horrible to look at, even if her vibrator has more sentience.

And then, in the middle of trying to prove to Clark that there’s absolutely nothing to get flustered about, Wayne rocks her fucking world. Not once, not twice, not a fluke — all weekend. In between rounds she spots him doing the New York Times crossword in pen and decides it’s a hallucination.

She limps (happily) back to the office on Monday and when Clark brings up Bruce Wayne again, she keeps her mouth shut.

[desperatecheesecubes]

I’m fucking sobbing kids really are just like that

[lemondoddle]

I can't believe how the tables have turned

[mamawasatesttube]

"tim is just like bruce" "tim is a mini batman" listen to me. fuck that. tim literally says he is not like batman and he does not want to be like batman. multiple times! throw that shit right out. do you wanna know who tim is a mini-me of?

listen to me. grips you by the shoulders. listen.

tim could be the second coming of lois lane.

they both have this incredibly nosy streak and an inability to stay out of situations if they think they can improve them. they are both fuelled by the need to do what is right and if no one else is gonna do it then by god they will.

"i care so much that i have to do something about it" is a fundamental tim and lois trait. "a locked door just means you have something to hide and i will find it" is also a fundamental tim and lois trait.

they are so similar. i NEED lois to get her hands on tim. i need them to get into hijinks and shenanigans together and i need clark and kon to look at each other and go "jesus christ there's TWO of them now?" as they hurry to go put out a fire. i need lois to hone and refine tim's hubristic streak and i need tim to enable her nosy snooping tendencies. tim & lois could be something beautiful. does anyone hear me. hi for the love of god hello is anyone listening

[pheoflame]

Superman and his superwoman 🥰

[thebibliosphere]

Sometimes, talking about religious trauma with other people is really funny for me (not funny, haha, more funny 'I should probably talk about that more in therapy) because it feels like I'm playing with a stacked deck.

Like, Mothman will talk about growing up with Catholic Guilt™, and another friend will talk about the shit they encountered in a Baptist church, all awful, truly horrific, damaging stuff.

Then they'll ask, "What about you?" and I hesitate because it's like, well, my dad was raised by his strict patriarchal Irish Catholic grandfather and Austrian Jewish grandmother* because his Jehova Witness mother was deemed unfit, so like, he'll argue with God, but feel really bad about it while also feeling the need to tell everyone about it.

And then there's my mother, who was raised Calvinist but fell into Christian Science for a while before falling fully into New Age Occultism tinged with insane family lore** while still holding onto the purity of Calvinism and the faith healing of Christian Science, which led to my parents raising me as an indigo starseed child sent to earth by angels to absorb the pain of others as God intended and that's why I never got taken to the doctor because it wasn't my body that was in pain, it was my soul.

And it's like, I swear I'm not trying to one-up you, I SWEAR. My family tree is just a smorgasbord of poor life choices and questionable reasoning ability.

----

*Arguably, the only normal one in the entire family who did her best to keep a lid on everything. ** Apparently, there was some family curse on my mother's mother's side from pissing off a fairy that caused all kinds of health problems that no one looked into because it was "the curse." They're still somewhat mad at me for going to a doctor and getting diagnosed with a genetic connective tissue disorder. Though, arguably, what is a genetic disorder if not a familial curse?

[essektheylyss]

It really is so fun that Essek started mentioning "my partner" like every three lines because he probably doesn't actually get the chance to talk about it that often.

I think there can often be an impulse when you really care about someone to want to shout from the rooftops all the great things you feel and notice about them, and Essek isn't really in a position to do that. The people who he can talk freely to already know him and Caleb, and the people who don't know them likely aren't safe to tell real personal details to. It's one thing to fabricate a parental relationship knowing that there isn't someone to trace that to, but it's an entirely different thing to tell someone honestly about the people you love when any small detail might put them in danger if it fell into the wrong hands.

The Hells are safe to say that kind of thing to—perhaps mostly on a meta level, in that the DM is aware that they are the protagonists—and they also characteristically tend to offer a listening ear to anyone they meet, and I think it's delightful that Essek actually recognized and responded to that.

[pan-bookish-ent]

Between Neil Gaiman's PR team astroturfing, the Good Omens fandom collectively covering their ears so no one gives them the ick about their favorite show, and generally all of the victim blamers and rape apologists... I'd say y'all are doing a fantastic job of burying not just this story, but any potential discussions about the allegations. I hope you're fucking proud of yourselves.

In the eternal words of Crowley:

"GROW BETTER!"

[darkarfs]

This is a flyer for the watch-along in NYC when the 5th season of Daria's premiere was set to air. on February 19th, 2001.

I really think Helen wouldn't have an issue with Daria and Jane sleeping with one another. I think she's astounded because Daria somehow got a fucking bunk bed up there without her noticing. And that Daria's smoking.

[mamawasatesttube]

i just think lois lane should put tim drake in her purse like a little dog. a scrunkly little companion who's even better at picking locks than she is, which is saying something. a nosy little freak after her own heart. the rubber duck she uses when talking her thoughts out loud to put clues together. her coffee gofer. her purse ferret.

[unnamedmedicalprofessional]

trigger warning for discussion of rape

it's very common when an artist has allegations against them for there to be something in their art that somehow reflects the shitty thing they did in a very unnerving way, and I recently realized a particularly gross one with Neil Gaiman.

In the Ocean At The End Of The Lane, the main character's dad has an affair with his son's babysitter. I do think the dad is framed as in the wrong for doing this, but it's mainly in the context of cheating on his wife. The babysitter is actually an evil immortal supernatural entity, which really sidesteps the power dynamic implications of sleeping with your kids babysitter. This didn't strike me as problematic at all when I first read it, but looking back knowing it was written by a guy who allegedly raped his kid's babysitter makes my skin crawl.

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Betty Hutton (Annie Get Your Gun)— She's adorable, she's a firecracker, she's hilarious, she's a dynamo personality, she's got the chops, she has the ~~RANGE~~ she's got the voice of a saucy angel!! She's not afraid to pull a funny face or go full in on a physically comedic bit! I love her vivacious energy, and that makes her 100 times hotter in my eyes. She's incandescent ✨

Priscilla Lane (Arsenic and Old Lace, Saboteur, The Roaring Twenties)— I see Priscilla Lane in Arsenic and Old Lace every year during my Halloween rewatch, and I always love watching her. She had a rubber-face for comedy, while still looking adorable no matter what funny face she’s making. She seems to have had a slightly fuller mouth than was the thin-lipped vogue at the time, and every time she pouts at her forgetful new husband, she looks so gosh-darn kissable that you understand completely why Cary Grant is so wild to get her on the train to Niagra for crazy honeymoon sex. No wonder this movie nearly got Hayes coded for the newlyweds being too hot for each other.

This is round 1 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut]

Betty Hutton:

This was the performance that first stole my heart:

Blond bombshell who's funny and can sing??? *Swoons*

Literally the charisma is off the charts. Her Annie Oakley? Iconic.

Anything you can do she can do hotter!

Priscilla Lane:

[lemondoddle]

something in fleabag about the names. we see the most intimate, uncomfortable, raw moments in these people's lives and yet half of the main characters don't have names. we call the main character fleabag because not one character throughout the entire series ever addresses her by name. we call her fleabag. no one's asked her a question in forty-five minutes. they make jabs about her need to be the center of attention. they never say her name. we call her fleabag.

[mirthandir]

Thinkin about how in Bloodborne everyone is too concerned with the werewolfisms and oldgodisms to bother asking what the living fuck is going on with those grannies on Hemwick Lane

[crowleys-hips]

good news

you can return ALL of @neil-gaiman's Audible audiobooks. According to policy, you're only able to return titles you've gotten with a credit within 365 days of the purchase, but if you contact support and give them your reason, they'll do it for you no problem. hope this helps! now if you'll excuse me, i'm gonna go curl into a ball and sob my eyes out 😎

[el-ffej]

I unabashedly love this show.