#leave em in this post or in my asks and I'll give em a look!!!

[beeguillotine]

Pokemon Wanted!!!

Heyhey everyone!!!! I'm making a little team for my new Tatsugiri oc to boss around and I'd love some suggestions for some fun mons to add to it!! Gimme some underappreciated faves of yours and I'll consider em!!! (no legends/mythicals/etc !! But any stage + any gen works !!)

[dontbesoweirdkira]

I propose an idea! Romantic Yandere Mark Grayson with batsib mc….oh I can feel the chaos that these two worlds would bring😂

A/N: "BIYVjhKDjshuguj" was my inital reaction to this requests because this is tew good. If you've seen my Mark Grayson post then you know exactly how insane this mf is.

Warnings: Pure crack to be honest? Like this is not even a serious post. I was laughing the entire time. Don’t even know where I was going with this but…I had fun

Requests? always open!

Masterlist

Two black haired, attention whore yanderes with the same last name, walk into a room with their darling in it...who's winning?

I mean technically their meeting is not too far fetched. Mortal Kombat and DC had a crossover..and Invincible is also apart of Mortal Kombat which means- nvm, you didn't ask for that.

Here's the thing, everyone in the family dislikes Mark but yan! Mark and Dick HATE each other the most but because they are low key so similar. Mark is obviously way more extreme but i digress. He brings out the absolutely worse out of Dick.

Like Dick has picked up a Knife and contemplated murder.

Mark and Dick's interactions are hilarious though?? Like they both have the exact same fake smile and passive (heavy on the aggressive) behaviors.

"Ahhh, Mark, we're always pleased to host you since y'know your parents obviously need some sort of break from an irritant, such as yourself."

"Thanks, Dick! But regardless of how much of an irritant i am to them, least i still have two biological parents to care for me. Maybe it's because they're not patrons of the circus....?"

*backhands him*

Jason isn't subtle and has whipped out his guns, ready to blast that mf. He's been the closet to causing Mark to blow up the mansion. It was a whole thing and you dumped Mark over it but of course he gaslighted you.

I think the family doesn't like the fact you're dating someone who can easily take advantage of you. (ironic) Mark is clearly dangerous, he's half viltrumite and they may not know everything his people are capable of but they know he can cause a lot of havoc. Mark is not only a threat to you but to them as well. He puts them in a state of constant high alert. They're always staring him down, searching for any signs of danger. I'm sure Batman has a fail safe plan all ready to go. They are eager for the moment they can take this mf down. Do you think they have the supers on speed dial just in case? Ugh even uncle Clark is disapproving of this too.

Your sisters try endlessly to have heart to hearts with you because WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING????? MARK?! They'd rather you date poke-a-dot man or something because why????

Mark isn't a dumbass, he knows they hate him. He also knows just how scared they are of him and it gives him some sort of sick pleasure knowing he could truly have you all to himself if he really wanted to. But there's really no point in that yet, you're wrapped around his fingers. He totally has thought about going back to his planet with you and keeping your pretty self locked up where your family won't ever find you. That'd really stick it to em'

The cocky, manipulation is just oozing off him every time he's around. The way he shoots threatening looks towards your siblings when they try to get your attention or "playfully" insulting them. There's never a moment where his head isn't held high, looking down at your siblings as if they were beneath him...He runs this place when he's over. Which is all the time because Bruce is like okay, if you won't leave him, you have to be supervised.

Can you imagine combined family dinners with Mark's family and yours??? First, there is definitely a fight of who is sitting next to who. I'll say your brothers win this and are sitting on either side while Mark is fuming as he's across from you. The tension is so freaking high. It's rather silent around the table but everyone is looking at each other either like "I'm ready to kill him when you are" or "i'm going to kill you, mark...". I headcanon that even Bruce has beef with Nolan. They clash rather constantly on their differences of how to handle villains. Nolan is a stone cold killer to Bruce, who is rather set in his ways. It's no wonder Mark is his son. You aren't going to be with this kid for long. "So, Bruce? How's things on your side of town? Still letting your boyfriend out of jail so you can keep playing tag?" "The Joker isn't my boyfriend, i'm just not into murder, unlike some "heros" are. I like to set an example for my kids." "Ah, is that why Jason threatened to kill my son at gun point last month?"

You and Debbie are the only ones who like are trying to be civil and are sort of ignorant to everything going on.

"Um, so i made brownies with Mark's mother for everyone! Anyone want a piece?"

"Of course, love. You know your brownies are my favorite, i've been waiting all day."

Your siblings act like savages and eat the entire pan, stuffing it in their mouths so Mark cannot get any. Bruce doesn't do anything to correct his children out of spite.

Bruce is also debating on just handling them right here. He could have Kal-el over in matters of minutes and this could all be over with.

(Okay but Mark and Damien beating each other’s asses???? Damien cannot bite his tongue and Mark is trying to be nice because he’s a kid but he then Damien call him a "little bitch boy" and it pushes him over the edge. Mark just jumps over the table lollllll???? Sad thing is, Damien gets in tons of cuts with the butterknife he was just using for his sweetroll heheh))) "I though you were invincible...guess i was right in calling you a little bi-" "OH YOU'RE DYING TONIGHT"

[divinedelusional]

𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐞𝐱 - 𝐣𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐠

jack schlossberg x fem reader

synopsis: it's been a while for reader and jack sooo they finally get down to it

warnings: smut so minors dni!! 18+ oral f receiving, vaginal sex, slightly sub jack

a/n: that was my first attempt at writing smut and first fic for jack too, inspired by this, obvi

You woke up to a smell of freshly brewed coffee. You hugged the pillow and opened one eye noticing that Jack wasn't by your side, but he appeared soon with a mug of coffee and a tray with food for you.

"You look so beautiful, honey" he said putting coffee and tray aside and gave you a slow kiss.

You indeed look amazing. Morning sun illuminating your frame covered in milky white sheets.

"Hey" you said looking at him with adoration. "Up so soon?" you asked taking a glass of orange juice he handed to you.

"Yeah, I'm sorry I couldn't reschedule the meeting, I forgot to tell you. But it won't be long I'm just meeting this guy about a podcast I agreed to do"

You smiled at him as he kept going.

"But after that I'm all yours. It's a little make up for it" he added pointing to the tray with your food. He made you an avocado toast with beacon on a side and an egg.

"It's great Jack, thank you so much" you said lifting yourself to kiss him. When you pulled you touched a small earring on his left ear.

"I still can't believe you pierced your ears" you chuckled.

"You like it babe?"

"Mhmm of course, you look hot as fuck"

You guys didn't see each other for the day, as Jack went out of town and you had been busy the day before. He came home on the evening when you were already half asleep. You greeted him and saw the earrings and wanted to wait for him, but you were asleep like a baby when he came from the shower.

"Would show you how much I like 'em babe, but what can I do if you're leaving me for a morning" you sighed dramatically.

"Then I'll make sure this meeting goes fast because holy shit..." he kissed you. "I want you so bad you have no idea" he kissed you again, slipping his tounge into your mouth. You almost moaned but didn't wanted to rile him up and make him late.

"Easy easy, we'll have a whole day once you're back" you chuckled.

Jack sighed and smiled at you, kissing your forehead quickly and got up from the bed.

You were eating your delicious breakfast and when he was already bundled up for nyc's cold weather he called to you.

"Bae you know what?? I haven't show my new look to the world yet"

He already posted a tiktok he recorded couple days ago, coming back from his break from social media.

"Well, give the people what they want hm?" you told him.

You saw him quickly checking himself in the mirror and then he pressed record.

"Soo basically I pierced both my ears andd" you heard him talking to the camera "I look like I've had a ton of sex in my life"

You were glad he stopped recording bc you snorted at the last part.

"What?" he asked

"Nothing babe, go you're gonna be late" you said laughing.

God, this man, you thought. He was unbelievable sometimes, but one thing you knew, you'll make sure he'd have sex today. A lot.

You've been reading your book, patiently waiting for your boyfriend. You couldn't focus on the plot as once again your thoughts drifted to the things you wanted to do with Jack. You haven't had sex for almost a week now. Both of you had really busy schedule and then Jack went to Boston. He was feeling down lately with the whole shutting down JFK's library thing. You loved how passionate he was with serving his country but you wished he could relax more. You were there for him of course, comforting him and he was so grateful for that.

But you felt like you both needed different kind of relaxation now. And God, you couldn't wait for it. You felt a growing need in you lower stomach, putting a hand over your mound and pressing lightly. You wanted to put your fingers into your cunt but decided not to. You and Jack didn't have this rule that you couldn't touch yourselves without the other, but you just wanted to wait for him. You could make yourself cum, but you were too needy today. You just knew your fingers wouldn't be enough to satisfy you. You wanted your man's cock. Badly. You wanted him to fuck you so deep you'd see a bulge in your belly.

"Oh fuck" you moaned at the thought and you knew your pussy was already soaked.

Just then you heard keys in the door and sighed with relief. Your torture was bout to end. You heard Jack taking of his shoes and water running as he washed his hands in the bathroom.

"Hi" you said when you came to him, wrapping your hands around his waist.

"Hi" he said, turning around and he pecked your lips. You didn't let him go as you sucked on his tounge. He let out a small moan and opened his mouth wider for you. Still in his embrace you pushed his chest and you walked to the kitchen, while kissing, well more likely licking all over your lips.

"Are you hungry?" you asked, pressing your hips to Jack's.

"Mhm" his voice an octave lower "not for food tho" he said and picked you up, turning around and sitting you on a kitchen island. You squealed at his action and sensation of a cold marble under your thighs. He kissed you, less sloppy this time, and you spread your legs wider when he moved to your neck.

"Jack" you moaned, when he sucked a hickey on your neck, licking over his piece of work.

"As much as I would love to fuck you here..." he said, voice muffled when he started to kiss the other side of your neck, massaging your left boob. "...i can't have my girl sore so early" he took your shorts of when he said that. "My, my what do we have here?" his eyes widened at the sight of a wet spot on your panties, one of his favorite pairs. It was thong made of cotton, burgundy red shade, with lace hugging your hip bones.

"Baby..." you whined quietly when Jack traced his finger over your clothed pussy.

"What honey? Don't be shy, what do you want me to do?"

"Jack, please, do whatever you want to do with me, please, I can't wait anymore"

"Oh baby, I don't wanna torture you. I missed this tight pussy so much. What was that, like four days I haven't felt her?" he was kneeling down, taking off your panties.

"Five"

He started by kissing your ankle, going up with his feather light kisses. He reached your thighs and wanted to tease you a little bit longer but his mind went blank when he was met with the sight of your glistening cunt and her delicious smell. His head empty, only a primal need and hunger left in.

"Fuckin shit, I can't wait any fucking longer" he panted and dived in.

He held your thighs in place, tho he knew he's going to let them go in a minute and let you crush his head with 'em. Usually he started slowly, giving kitten licks to your clit, teasing a finger at your entrance, but he was hungry today and he wanted to take what was his.

His tounge pushed through your folds, going straight for your hole. He pushed it as deep as he could, without a warning and you pulled his hair immediately.

"Oh my fucking... god, Jack please" you moaned. You loved when he tounge fucked your pussy. He would have the stupidest shit eating grin on his face if he wasn't thrusting his tounge in and out of you with such force.

God, his tounge will hurt, you thought to yourself, though you couldn't care much, when your boyfriend was making you feel like this. You were already getting close, to fast for your liking, but you knew you couldn't blame yourself. You pussy was starving for attention and your boyfriend was always so fucking good with his mouth. You were about to tell him that you're gonna cum, when his tounge slid out of you. You wanted to protest, but in the blink of an eye you felt a whole different sensation when Jack had spit directly onto your clit. High pitched whine escaped your throat and you buried your fingers deeper in Jack's hair. His mouth instantly went back to your pussy, his tounge danced on your clit, giving it just the right amount of pressure. He knew you were seconds away from cumming when your nails scratched his scalp harder than before. You were a mess above him and you screamed his name, when with one final flick of his tounge you came all over his face. He lapped at your spasming hole and his nose was pressing against your sensitive bud.

"Jack, Jack, stop, I can't anymore..." you whined and he listened to your pleas and stopped the assault on your pussy.

He lifted himself up, positioning his body between your legs. You were propped up on your elbows and were looking at his face soaked with your juices, when he leaned in.

"Taste yourself, pretty girl" he murmured, before pressing his lips to yours. Your mouth opened right away, letting him in. You kissed so agonizingly slow, but you loved when he got sloppy with his kisses, like he didn't want to leave any part untouched.

Kisses might have been slow, but movements of his hips were getting faster with each second. Suddenly you became aware of your boyfriend's raging erection, grinding on your wet pussy.

"Jack, wait"

"Nnghh, no" he mumbled pulling you to himself again, but you pushed him back before he could kiss you again. He watched you, shocked for a second, his frame resting against the headboard right know. His pupils widened when you climbed on top of him.

"You deserve a big thank you after what you just did Mr. Schlossberg" you breathed to his ear and start to suck a hickey on his jawline. He let out a small moan, as you kept talking. "My baby, did so good for me that his girl didn't even notice how hard you were... you must be already leaking, huh honey?" you asked him palming him through his boxers.

"Please, baby, I'm so, oh fuck, so hard for you, please let me..." he tried to switch your positions, but you restisted. You took his boxers off, letting his cock free.

"Remember what I told you this morning?" you asked, lifting your hips up and lining your entrance with his dick.

"Uh huh" he noded through his gasps as you began to sink down onto him.

"Yes" you hissed with satisfaction and leaned down to bite his earlobe. "Need to show you how much I like your new look, how fuck, how hot you look, Jack" with this words you fully sank down, his dick filling you completely.

"Fuck, fuck, y/n, be a doll and fuck me, please"

"Oh baby, don't worry. You have to live up to your new look right? I'm getting sure, you'll get that ton of sex you talked about this morning"

Jack shot his head back, panting your name.

Already a mess, you thought to yourself, and he has no idea that you just started his fun with him.

reblogs and comments highly appreciatated♡

[vampydrabbles]

MDNI, UNEDITED SMUT AHEAD YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!!!!

simon riley x (fem) reader

cw: he's a little nasty. nothing too crazy- a bit of praise, a bit of degredation. p in v, some fingering, possessive simon

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first post here thanks for reading <33

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He stares down at you, eyes cold- unreadable. He keeps his hand on your hip, keeping your back pushed down into the plush mattress. He watches your chest heave, rough hand sliding down your thigh before reeling back- a loud *smack* and a yelp from you making his cock twitch.

"Pretty girl-" He hums, rubbing at the stinging handprint he's just left on you, a subtle apology before he slaps it again, making you whine. " So perfect. Look at you- " he growls, eyes raking up and down your exposed form. "You look so good for me like this, love." He leans down over you, hot breath on your face through the fabric of his mask. "Gonna be a good girl for me, yea?" He asks, his free hand sliding up to your throat, giving it a gentle squeeze. You whine and nod, body pricking with goosebumps. "I'll be good, Si-" you whimper. He's still looking at you with that dark gaze, and it sends a chill down your spine. That hard look is the last thing so many men have seen, a look thats feared, - and for some reason, that sends a wave of heat over you.

His gaze flits over your body again, before locking with yours again. Suddenly he grabs your hips, yanking you towards the edge of the bed like you weigh nothing. You barely have enough time to process the movement before he's running his fingers over the damp spot of your panties- those little black lace ones that drive him wild - his movements deliberate. Calculated.

You whine and tilt your hips up, desperate for more friction. He releases your throat to smack at the fat of your thigh again, leaving another stinging handprint.

"*Don't fucking move.*" he hisses, digging his hand into your thigh, keeping your hips pinned down.

"You said you'd be a good girl for me. Fucking act like it." His voice is low and dangerous, he knows you love it when he talks to you like that. You just nod and mutter out a "sorry". He seems to take the apology, at least for now, and palms over your center a bit harder now- just over your clit. You whine, but know better than to try to seek more.

"Good girl. You're learnin. My smart girl-" he hums again, tugging your panties to the side. His thick fingers find their way between your folds, dragging a moan from you when he rubs at your clit. You close your eyes, soft whines and whimpers tumbling from your lips.

"Fuck, baby, you're so pretty.." he mumbles. "You need it- need ta get fucked, love-" he growls. You watch as he fumbles with his belt, he can't get it off fast enough.

He discards his jeans and boxers on the floor along with his shirt and your clothes (which have long since been gone).

You move to take off your panties but he grabs your wrist.

"Leave em on, lovie. Wanna make a mess of em." He says, no room for arguement. You just nod, watching as he presses your legs apart, rubbing the tip of his leaky cock over your panties. You swear you can see the outline of a smile under his mask, but your not sure. He slips your panties to the side again, sliding his dick along your slit, gathering up your arousal. He groans softly. "Fuck, baby.. I'm gonna ruin you.." He hisses as he bullies the tip of his dick into you, drawing a mewl from you. It's always an adjustment for the first couple of minutes, no matter how well he preps you. He suddenly snaps his hips forward, burying himself into you with a groan. You let out a squeal, clenching around him.

"God, you take it so well.." he mumbles. He slowly draws his cock back out of you, his eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of you around him. "So wet- fuck-" he huffs. "Feels so good, love. My pussy-" he snaps his hips forward again, rutting into you at a relentless pace. You're just incoherent babbles and moans, hands gripping his biceps that flex under your touch. The sounds you make are obscene, the rhythmic "ah- ah- ah-" in time with the sounds of the headboard hitting the wall. He says he'll fix it, but he won't. Some sick part of him hopes the neighbors hear, so they know who you belong to.

He moans, fingers digging into your hips as he pulls you onto him.

"My pretty pussy- fuck, she feels so good- takes me so well-" he mumbles out. You're not even sure if he knows he's saying anything outloud, but it doesn't matter. His words make you even more wet, heat pooling in your tummy. Your eyes are fixed on the way he looks- his huge arms and hands keeping you against the bed, the way his brows furrow and his eyes squeeze shut. You wish you could see his face, see how his lips are parted as he moans.

"You deserve this-" he growls. "Deserve to get fucked, God youre perfect-" he huffs, his pace growing more relentless. He presses himself over you, his cock stretching you out and hitting everything at once. God forbid anything ever happens between you two- he's ruined you for any other man.

"Simon-" you cry out, mascara smudged, thighs trembling.

"Shh- you can take it. I'm so proud of you-" he huffs, pressing you down into the mattress more. His hands roam your body, feeling every inch before lifting his mask for just a moment just to spit on your puffy pussy, reaching down and circling your clit.

"Cum on my cock." A demand. The room is filled with the sounds of his breathing, of your moans, and the lewd impact of his hips against your ass. That heat pooling in your tummy shoots further down now, your pussy sucking him in more.

"Fuck- I'm gonna cum-" you cry, just in time for that white hot wave of pleasure to rack your body. You moan, hips bucking a bit, but he doesn't stop. He keeps rutting into you wildly, chasing his own high.

"There's my good girl-" he growls. "Gonna cover you, yeah? Get these sweet little panties all messy-"

You can feel his cock twitch and get harder, you know he's close.

"My little toy- fuck, she feels so good.. you like it when I use you like this, huh baby?" His chest heaves, and his eyes lock with yours. "Gonna make a mess of you-" he growls, his eyes squeezing shut again. He pulls out with just enough time, thick ropes of cum shooting over your panties and onto your tummy, his moans drowning out any thought you might have had.

It takes a moment for him to open his eyes, shoulders heaving as he gets his breathing under control. He looks down at the mess he's made of you, and you're sure that this time he's got a cheeky smile under the mask.

"Let's get you cleaned up, angel."

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[changisworld]

Baby fever

Husband!Chan x reader

word count;3,200

Summary: Your husband, Bangchan has finally decided that he too wants a baby, after you constantly pestering him & getting it into how good parents you would both be.

-just HAD to write this after I got an ask about & then having my amazing 🪫 anon AGREEING which has now encouraged me to write this heheh,

18+, MDNI, SMUT WARNINGS UNDER THE CUT

©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.

main masterlist here

SMUT WARNINGS: PIV, oral(f rec), B R E E D I N G kink, creampie, lactation kink if you squint, nipple sucking, slight dirty talk, channie is BBBIIIGGG, bulge kink, body worship, marking, lovemaking, praise, aftercare but more off screen, 99% smut 1% backstory :3

You & your husband, Chan are just strolling around Walmart, doing some grocery shopping for your fridge & cupboards & you both end up walking past the small clothes section & your eyes land instantly on the cute newborn baby onzies & cute baby packs of socks.

"Channieeee, how can you even look at this n not want a baby? the clothes are so teeny & adorable!" you cheer, looking at him with a big smile & doe eyes on your face & chan just looks at you & rolls his eyes, smiling at you as he reaches out to touch the baby clothes, looking at all the cute patterns on them.

"Shhh! It's not that I don't want a baby, It's just scary! You say the exact same quote every time we walk past anything to do with babies I can rehearse it!" He giggles before putting his hand up & splaying it across the little onzie, comparing the size to it.

"I know but I'm just dyyying for a baby! Would you prefer a boy or a girl? & you've been saying you'll 'think about it' for monthhhs! We'd be the best parents on earth n you know it, I've seen you with kids & you'd be the best dad evverrrrr!" you cheer back, reaching out to ruffle his soft black hair & he kneans into your touch.

"I wouldn't care if about gender as long as I got a mini us & I knowww but still! You've came off the pill so now we just gotta see if it happens, can you get us some tomatoes? We forgot to pick em up." He questions you, putting both hands back on the cart & giving you a kiss on your cheek, making you blush.

"Doesn't mean much if you pull out Channie! I'll grab five." you sigh as you leave your husband & walk to go get what he asked you to. Chan watches you leave before he looks back at some of the cute baby clothes & he picks up three different onzies in different stripes & also polka dot patterns, he also picks up a cute little white baby hat before he buries it underneath the small mountain of items still in the cart before making his way to the checkout, texting you to just put the tomatoes back & meet him at the car.

⭑･ﾟﾟ･:༅｡.｡༅:ﾟ::✼✿　　✿･⭑✼:ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ

"I didn't even realise that you'd asked me for tomatoes but while I was there I remembered you don't even like tomatoes!" You whine as you buckle in your seatbelt, turning to look at the man beside you, now laughing as he turns the key.

"I just wanted to see if you'd remember! You failed the test." he chirps back & you swat him on the arm jokingly & he just laughs at you again before driving back to your shared home.

The rest of the day goes without a hitch, Chan insists on putting the items away & you don't complain, deciding to just tidy up your shared bedroom instead, reorganising the room & making the bed before deciding to just do some laundry since you have the habit of letting it pile up.

You are sorting out your jewellery box, using your shirt to make each piece shinier before replacing each part, fully rearranging the box in front of you when your bedroom door opens & Chan enters the room, hands behind his back.

"Ah, what ya doin babe?" he questions, looking a bit antsy. "Just tidying, why? Wha'cha hiding?" you reply, your head nodding towards him, referring to whatever he is holding behind his frame.

"well eh, I couldn't decide if I was gonna hide it for a while longer or if I wanted to lay it on the bed with rose petals or something, make it all romantic but you caught me, can I do that or are you gonna be stubborn n make me show you now?" he hums to you & you frown your eyebrows at him, chuckling as you try move your head to see what is in his hands, but he is quicker & keeps moving his frame.

"You know me too well, I really am that stubborn, show meeee." you reply as you do as he asks of you anyway & you stand in front of him before closing your eyes & cupping your hands in front of the both of you.

He takes in a deep breath & you just know his hands are shaking behind is back. "Just know y/nnie, no pressure! I don't want you to feel like I'm putting you on the spot." he says in a soft voice as he places something in your hands.

You open your eyes after nodding at his words & look down & what is it you see? A few of the tiny baby onzies you were dreaming over just a few hours ago & an adorable tiny tiny baby hat laying on top of them.

You look up at Chan, nerves smeared all over his features, his adams apple moving through his throat as he swallows, not taking his eyes off you as his hands cup themselves over the outside of yours, his thumbs caressing your hands.

"Is this what I think this means, Channie?" you ask, your mind going at a million miles an hour & the butterflies in your stomach being that crazy you're convinced they're about to fly out of your mouth.

"Uh.. yeah, I've had my mind up for a while, just got a bit scared to directly say it I guess?" he replies, his cheeks a shade of rose pink as you can feel his hands slightly shaking & getting warmer against your as he keeps his on yours.

"Channie, you're so silly, there was nothing to be scared of when I've been begging you to knock me up!" you joke as you softly throw the small fabric on the chest of drawers beside you both before practically throwing yourself at him, connecting your lips together, he freezes for a second before melting into your touch & kissing you back passionately.

He ushers you towards the bed & you lay down once the back of your knees hit the edge of your bed & chan follows right behind you, putting his hand & forearm on the bed beside your head to hold up his weight as his tongue begins to break past your lips, tasting you deeper, which you have no problem reciprocating.

You worm your hands beneath one of his usual black shirts & you feel over his chiselled abs, making him squirm. "You really are desperate, aren'cha?" he teases as he takes the three seconds to take his top off before getting back into the same position he was in before, taking the time to admire your slightly reddened & spit glossed lips.

"Well why waste time when I've been begging for so long?" you chirp back as you wriggle yourself up the bed, making chan follow not long behind you.

Your husband just smirks at you before kissing the tip of your nose. "I love you, soooo much, you mean the world n more to me." he murmurs in a sweet tone to you before he begins to kiss your jawline before making his way down to your neck, nibbling on different spots of your neck before lightly suckling on the exact same parts of skin, leaving four dark red marks on the right side of your neck.

Chan bunches your shirt up at the top of your chest, not bothering to take it off as he wriggles himself downwards just an inch & begins to fondle your tits over your bra as he kisses the parts not covered by the fabric & you sit up just enough to unclasp it for him & he lets out a hum of approval before taking a look up at you, the both of your eyes completely full of lust, pupils blown out & your stomach does a flip.

He cups your right tit in his hand as he starts to tongue your left nipple, your nipples perking up even more than what the cold air caused. He takes it in his mouth & suckles on it, making your back arch off the bed & you let out a small hum as you let your fingers find their way into his hair, playing with it.

"Your tits are so perfect, can't even imagine these filled with milk, try save me some, alright?" he says, more to himself but he still takes the time to look up at you, his fingers not stalling on your right nipple before reattaching his pretty, pink, puffy lips to your nipple, sucking on it as if it's the last time he will ever do so.

"Channie with a lactation kink? who woulda guessed." you chuckle at him as he switches tit, repeating the action & you close your eyes, simply taking in the feeling.

He then stops his motions & gives yet another hickey to your left tit before kissing all the way down your stomach before pushing your shorts & underwear off your smooth legs without much struggle.

"How do you blame me, have you seen you?" he remarks back at your words, not even looking up at you this time as he now settles down at your legs before pushing them open, now looking at your pretty, now glistening cunt & he sighs, a dreamy look painting his features & your heart melts.

He wants to tease you but his own patience is wearing thin so after a few kisses to your thighs, working his way inwards, not missing the way you squirm & twitch beneath him as your thighs rest on his broad shoulders & he licks a long, slow stripe up your cunt which makes you shudder.

He uses the tip of his tongue to slightly tease you but mostly to get a deeper taste by licking the outside part of your folds before using his tongue to part them further before he works his way up to your clit & begins kitten licking it.

"Chan, like that, fingers please." you request, sucking a breath through your teeth, trying your best to stay still for him. "say please n I will" he teases to you before moving away from your clit, much at your disapproval & begins teasing your now leaking hole.

"Pretty pleaseee, Channie, please." You beg as you try push your hips towards him, giving him that little bit extra of your cunt on his lips & he obviously can't help but let out a muffled groan as he starts to grind his hips against the bedsheets, trying to ease even a tiny bit of the pressure in his cock as he listens to your pleas & enters his middle & index finger into your pussy, a small squelch being heard.

He picks up the pace on your clit as he begins to suck & nibble on it, not caring about how much spit is escaping his lips as his fingers match the same speed, doing a 'come here' motion & you begin grinding against his face, your hands reaching down to twist your nipples in your fingers as you begin to fall apart.

"Gonna cum channie, don't stop." you basically demand as your eyes scrunch closed & your legs close in on his head, but he doesn't budge & continues at the same speed, smirking into you & humming & moaning into you & your orgasm bubbles over not even five seconds later, moaning his name non stop.

He lets you ride out your orgasm on his tongue & fingers as he slowly slows down his movements until you begin to whine & he knows your body well enough to know it's the overstimulation setting in.

He pulls out his fingers & puts them up to his mouth & sucks the orgasm you just had off his fingers & groans to himself before licking his lips & then making his way back up to you & kissing you, allowing you to taste yourself on his tongue & you whimper on his lips.

"Taste as good as always, do you still wanna do this Channie? You can still pull out if you have any doubts." you reassure him, cupping his cheek with your hand & moving your thumb back & forth, giving him a warm smile. "I'd never back out babe, especially now that it's out in the open, lemme put this baby in you, mkay?" he chirps, nuzzling into your touch before allowing you to sit up so you can take your top off & he strips too, his cock slapping against his lower stomach as he helps manoeuvre you towards the edge of the bed & stands between your legs, jerking himself a few times, his tip already shiny with the amount of precum that has been leaking for the past twenty minutes or so.

He gives you a warm smile & he reaches down to hold your hand, your wedding rings beside one another as he begins to slowly push in, knowing he can't go too quick as he is aware how big he is, he knows he needs to allow a lot of time to stretch so he doesn't make it hurt any more than needed since no matter how much prep he gives you, it still makes you hold your breath for a second.

He buries himself to the hilt & he pauses, letting you get adjust as he kisses your ring finger, making you both blush as you look at each other, nothing but love & adoration in both of your eyes.

"You can move, 'm ready." you softly speak & chan hums as he moves his hips before softly moving them forward again, both of you letting out a moan in unison. "you're so tight, y/n, I'm fully convinced you're made for me." He says in a hoarse voice, biting his bottom lip, making you clench around him.

He begins a medium pace, hitting your G-spot each time & you can barely catch your breath as you both make eye contact, not one of you daring to break it as you can both slightly hear the wet, squelching noises of your cunt wrapping around his cock over your shared moans.

"Chan-nie, you're in my s-stomach, fuck." you yelp as he changes his position slightly, hammering into your spongey spot & kissing your cervix in a painful yet addicting way.

"Hmm yea? I can tell, look at it sweetie." he groans back, slightly breathless as he stands up, pace not slowing as he takes the hand which he is still holding & placing it on your lower stomach & you can't help but get giddy as you can feel his cock in your pelvis, making you clench around your husband more than you already were, making his pace falter.

"Taking me so well, babe, see? too bad we won't get to see it in your pretty belly once my cum sticks, can't say I-I'd complain though." he basically whimpers as he leans back over you, taking your lips in his own as he continues to destroy your poor hole & you yelp into his mouth with how deep he is.

"C-I'm gonna cum, gim-gimme it." you shriek as your hands reach onto behind his back & you dig your nails into his back, refusing to let go & chan just groans into you as he kisses you again, muffling both of your moans but only slightly.

You begin clenching around his cock & he stands back upright to be able to take in the whole sight. He reaches down to rub your swollen button with his thumb & you don't even have the right mind to even be able to warn him before your second orgasm hits you like a brick wall & your legs begin shaking as your back arches & you let out a shriek as you cum, this time all over his cock, your orgasm so strong it almost pushes him out of your hole.

He doesn't falter his pace this time & continues at the same speed & rhythm, throwing his head back but not for long as he feels his own orgasm starting to bubble up.

He looks down at your pretty, reddened face, a small shimmer on your skin, your tits bouncing along with his thrusts as you pinch your nipples again, not breaking eye contact with you.

"Cha-channie, s-so big I-I swear to f-fuck, please c-cum in me, gim-gimme your baby." you whine up at him, trying your best to ignore the overstimulation he is giving you for the sake of his own release & mostly focusing on just trying to push the simple sentence out.

"Wou-wouldn't dream oth-otherwise, beautiful, your pretty belly gon-gonna be so full for me, I know it's gonna s-stick, you're t-too good for me, my angel." he says, breathless & he takes your left hand in his again & he sucks on two of your fingers as he lets his orgasm take over, having to use all his strength to keep himself standing as he lets his cum coat your walls, you taking in the feeling of it too.

Chan lets his own orgasm come & then pass before he slowly pulls out, not failing to notice how his dick is so shiny you'd think he put lube on it & he uses the rest of his strength to help you lay at the top of the bed & he rests his back against the pillows, letting you lay between his legs, your back against his chest.

He grabs the bottle of water from his side of the beds bedside table as he always insists on having water there & feeding you it as he kisses the top of your head.

"Did so well for me hunny, you not sore or anything? I love you sooo much. want me to run you a bath n make food?" he questions softly as he reaches down with the hand not holding the bottle to rub over your stomach.

"I'm fine, more than fine actually, just daydreaming about out future bundle of joy! Just wanna lay here for now but yes, we can bath n eat soon, just lemme melt into you a bit more first." you half joke as you turn your head way from the bottle, indirectly telling him you're finished drinking & he just half laughs as he puts it back where he originally found it & cuddles you.

"Just gotta think of baby names don't we? It can't come soon enough, you can choose food since you'll complain if I order something for us if you give me the freedom to choose." he jokes & you just 'tut' at his words, smiling as you rest your head on his arms.

->Taglist:open!

->Anon list:open!

[honey-crypt]

spicy ask here but can i request a drabble of elliot and farmer about to go down on each other and farmer reveals to elliot that’s he’s their first time (i’ve been obsessed with your work, i always love reading your posts and i love your disability pride month works, ty for making me feel seen :D)

a/n: so sorry that this took forever! between being in anti-horny writing mode and getting sick, i couldn't complete this in a timely fashion (>,<);; but i hope you enjoy this, nonetheless! (and tysm for the praise towards my disability pride month write a thon hehe)

wc: 595

warnings: nsfw, farmer's a virgin, gender neutral farmer (too many uses of the word 'hole'), sweet sappy love making, elliott's a good partner, safe sex, aftercare

summary: you confess to elliott that you're a virgin and he tries to give you the best first time possible

★ virginial bliss - elliott x farmer ★

Elliott hovered over your nude body, his freckled cheeks dusted red from the summer heat and the passion of the night's early foreplay. You looked simply divine, sweat clinging to your supple skin and your pupils as wide as saucers. His cock lined up against your lubed up hole, the mushroom tip leaking with pre-cum and eager to feel your warmth.

"Ellie..." you mewled to the writer. He focused on your face, appreciating every aspect from your eyes to your lips, as he responded, "Yes, my love?"

"I need to tell you something," you answered. Elliott pushed himself off of you and sat on his knees, "Oh! Is everything alright, dear?" he wouldn't proceed without your consent, waiting for your word like an obedient pup. You too sat up and wrapped your arms around Elliott, pulling back down on you, "Ellie..." you hummed, "This is a little embarrassing but..." you leaned into his ear, hot breath tickling his skin, "I'm a virgin."

"You are?" the redhead seemed stunned. How could someone as beautiful, as amazing, as sweet as you be a virgin? Nonetheless, he whispered back, "Do not fret, my love. I'll do my best to ensure that your first time is lovely as can be."

"You treat me so well, Elliott," you pressed a kiss to his neck, "I'm so happy that you're gonna be my first time."

"Of course," he resumed his position, tip of his cock pointing at your hole, "I'll go as slow as possible, please let me know if you need me to stop, alright?"

"Alright," you replied, holding onto Elliott's arms. Your nails dug into his skin, as he pushed himself inside of your warm hole, the foreign sensation of being full down in your hole made you mewl like a pathetic little kitten.

"Doing okay?" asked Elliott, pausing his entry. He was only half way in and already, you were melting from his cock, "Yes!" you exclaimed, "Keep going!"

Elliott obeyed and pushed the remainder of his cock inside, earning a choked moan from you. Tears swelled up in the corners of your eyes, but Elliott quickly wiped them away, "Let's take a moment, you will adjust soon enough."

You clung to Elliott, holding on tight until the pain in your hole morphed into unfamiliar pleasure. Your skin was on fire, your heart was pounding, and Yoba did you need to be fucked.

"Ellie!" you cried out to the redhead, "Please, please move!"

"Absolutely, my dear," he began to thrust, the sensation turning your mind to goo. All you could think about was Elliott, as he made love to you in that farmhouse bed. Elliott peppered kisses on your chest and neck while he thrusted into your hole, his mind consumed with thoughts of you.

It felt like an eternity before Elliott climaxed, trapping you in a vice with his toned arms while he shot ropes of cum into the condom. You soon followed him in climax, your body convulsing while you rode your orgasm. After a moment of rest, Elliott pulled out of your hole and discarded the condom, leaving the bedroom and returning with a wet towel from the bathroom.

"You did so good," purred Elliott, as he wiped any fluids off of you and kissed your face, "You did so very good."

"Elliott..." you pulled him into an embrace after he cleaned you up, "I love you," you confessed. Elliott's cheeks reddened at your 'I love you' and muttered back, "I love you, too," as the two of you drifted off to a sweet slumber.

[thatztyv]

Pretty Girl

Description:

- I don’t know🤷🏾‍♀️.. Urban hopped on Ki’Asia’s IG Live

Word Count:

- 877

Ki'Asia Moore

(kie- a-she-uh  more)

kiasia

Liked by urbanwyatt and 36,729 others

kiasia friend? bitch I said you bad

View all 750 comments

sarah56 Druski said it best

simp4brent be my girlfriend😩

urbanwyatt 😍😍 ♡

bankroll3k so pretty🥹

kelseiqueen 😩😍 ♡

.☆.

"Wassup y'all", I said as I set my phone up on my vanity.

tinytee hey Asia🙂

simp4brent Hey Asia boo

yolodolo yuurrr

"How was y'all day?", I asked as I combed through my hair.

freek3 Good

2litlaii Amazing, what about you?

kiyaforpres It was ok

greatdain Great

"Lai why was your day so amazing?", I chuckled as I stopped to read the comments.

"Kiya, I hope you have a better day tomorrow. Keep your head up boo, I love you", I said before combing my hair again.

2litlaii Cause I got to see my man 🤭

kiyaforpres thank you 😊

youngin23 you're so sweet 🥹

"Girl you and this man of yours", I said playfully rolling my eyes. "I'm a lover girl with no lover.. I hope y'all happy though."

delulu4you Girl same

seedy.me Man what

danitrips Everyday all you hear from me is "lord...it's me again"

"Dani that be me twenty four seven", I chuckled. "Anyways y'all like my hair. I did it myself."

bigbossvette It's cute😍

wantedho Come do mine 🧍🏾‍♀️

hypemantee4 Ok volume come through

herbsnish You would look so good in a blonde wig

"I'm scared to try blonde cause what if I look crazy", I said as I looked in the mirror and started to put my hair in two braids.

bigbossvette If you try blonde I'll do it with you

yougin23 We need a wig install tutorial cause it's giving scalp 😛

urbanwyatt your voice is perfect ⭐️

"Bet cousin I'll order em tomorrow... that's actually my next video, then imma stop posting for another six months", I chuckled as I started on the last braid.

I scanned over the comments before smiling.

urbanwyatt can I take you on a date?

"Depends on where you taking me sir", I said as I tied a scarf on my head.

simp4you I knew I wasn't tripping what Urban doing over here

danitrips Not Urban asking somebody on a date

sammydee URBAN ?!?

"On a side note, what y'all had or having for dinner? ", I said as I put my bonnet on.

danitrips Tea cause what you and Urban got going that you ain't telling us bout ☕️🫖

sammydee Tacos

wally.t Shrimp scampi 🍤

urbanwyatt is requesting to join live.

Accept or Decline

"Dani we ain't got nothing going", I said as I pressed accept to Urban's request.

"Hey pretty girl", Urban said once it connected. "Wassup live."

"Hi Urban", I said and smiled a little.

kentuckyboys URBAN JOINED THE LIVE, two of my worlds are colliding 😱

youngin23 Yuurrrr

2litlaii I know this finna be good.. just might chromecast my phone to the tv

bigbossvette 👀

"I'm nosey, where you at?", I asked as I arched a brow at him.

"On the tour bus", he said as he propped his phone up.

"Mm", I hummed as I leaned closer to my phone. "What town you in?"

"Frankfort."

"Oh you in my city. I would've had you pull up if I would have known earlier."

"I still can, it's never too late", he said before rubbing his beard.

"I'm ready for bed now. It's definitely too late boo."

simp4you 👀

kelseiqueen I'm just enjoying the show rn 🍿

"You know you got some sexy lips."

He smirked before licking his lips.

kentuckyboys Don't steal my man 😖

harlowslut Urban where is Jackman

2sexy.dee them lips real sexy 😩

"You know I could- nevermind", he started but cut himself off.

"No say what you were about to say", I said with a slight smile.

"It's too many people watching. I can't say all that", he chuckled.

"I understand."

simp4brent Fuck all that, say it Urban 😖

sarah56 nooo we wanna know

lostinthewind Don't leave us hanging like that

We got quiet, just looking at each other.

2litlaii Not y'all eye fucking in front of us

bigbossvette I feel like I'm interrupting 😭

kelseiqueen On this day, Ki'Asia and Urban fell in love 😩

"Anyways where you taking me to eat at?"

"McDonalds", he said nonchalantly.

"Blocked", I said reaching for my phone.

"I'm playing, I'm playing", he said laughing as he grabbed his phone.

bigbossvette 🤣🤣

simp4you McDonald's is OUTRAGEOUS 😭

freek3 ngl I would've kicked him off and blocked him so fast 😭😭😭

2litlaii Screaming 🤣

"Urban, you gone fool around and get blocked", I said as I picked my phone up.

"Ki'Asia you would never block me."

"Yes I would. You wanna see?"

"Don't block me", he chuckled. "I'll take you anywhere you wanna go."

wantedho ooh- girl I'd be cutting up, you heard how he just said your name effortlessly 😩

herbsnish don't play with her Urban

lanixworld Y'all!! What if they been going together this whole time and we just clueless 😱

"Nah Lani this is me and Urban first ever interaction outside of liking each others post", I chuckled. "No secret relationship."

"It could be though."

"Mmm."

freek3 So back to what I saying...This could be us but you playing !😩

kelseiqueen 👀

"Y'all I'm finna end this. I want to have a private conversation with Mr Urban", I said with a slight smirk.

"Private conversation? Mmm this might be interesting", he hummed.

herbsnish Urban don't fumble the bag bro 😐

jackharlow 👀

bigbossvette You better text me Asia I wanna know what y'all talk about

kelseiqueen You better update us bookie

kentuckyboys where tf Jack come from

"Bye y'all", I said before ending the live.

[serensama]

Dr, Who?

Thursday Bangers - ongoing weekly prompts by the amazing @woundedsoul12 . I will be doing my best to create a story out of each lyric given to me and will be updating this post as we go along to keep it all in one place!

Read on Ao3

Prompts provided thus far:

I wonder if your therapist knows everything about me - "The Last of the Real Ones", Fall out boy

A hundred days have made me older since the last time that I saw your pretty face - Here without you, Three Days Grace

I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all - Lover by Taylor Swift

I'm prepared to sacrifice my life I would gladly do it twice - Mercy by Shawn Mendes

I don't know what I'm supposed to do Haunted by the ghost of you Oh, take me back to the night we met- The night we met by Lord Huron

No matter what happens, he cannot come between us again I know we're better than friends- Million Dollar Baby by Tommy Richman

Baby, I'm so into you, darling, if you only knew, all the things that flow through my mind - Fantasy by Mariah Carey

And I'd give up forever to touch you, 'Cause I know that you feel me somehow, You're the closest to Heaven that I'll ever be, And I don't wanna go home right now - Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls

All my friends we're glorious, Tonight we are victorious- Victorious by Panic! At The Disco

——— 

Lilya managed to catch herself before falling onto her face, pulling away from the insistent hands urging her to stay warm in bed. 

“Stop it! I have to go, I’m going to be late!” 

“Just call in sick!” 

“I have a really important- let go of my bra!- appointment.” 

“But I was hoping to get to know you more.”

“Yes, that would be lovely. But I have got to go-”

“What’s the address of your office? I want to take you out for lunch, seeing as we can’t have breakfast together.” 

“Oh um, yeah- sure. I’ll text it to you, see you then!” 

“Hey- wait-”

She didn’t wait for him to finish his sentence before bolting out of his apartment. It was only as she slid into the back seat of her uber that she realised she didn’t have his phone number. Or remembered his name. Curse Teia for calling her out to bitch and moan about her latest break up with Viago and bullying her into drinking all those shots. Before she knew it, her friend had drunk dialled her stepbrother and the two were back together and disappearing into a darkened corner of the upscale bar, leaving her alone with her phone, two abandoned shots and the arrival of a really, really attractive man who had no right to look as good in a suit as he did. 

She further cursed Teia for her buzz, the liquid courage in veins making her brave enough to give voice to her curiosity if he looked as good out of the suit as well. He was surprised, pleasantly so, but he confirmed that he would not be disinclined to help sate her inquisitiveness. 

The drinks remained abandoned. A text sent to Teia to let her know she was okay, along with a selfie to show her who she was leaving with- and the next thing she knew they were in a cab, with his lips on her neck and his hand up her skirt. So reckless. She hadn’t had a one night stand since her final year in university. This man however, was much more skilled than the football player she had left the bar with so many years ago. 

It was neither here nor there. It was just some fun, a great story to tell Teia and a fond memory of the sweet one night stand. Lilya rushed into her rooms and waved at her 11:00am appointment, patiently waiting for her with a kind smile. 

“I’m so sorry I was late! Please give me two seconds and I’ll be right with you!” 

——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— 

She was right. It was an important appointment. Her patient had a breakthrough, understanding the complexities of what he had been through and knowing it was okay not to be okay with any of it, she almost cried with him as he broke down for the first time since he was a child. They booked in a time to see each other the following week and she was so damn proud of him, she asked if he would be adverse to a hug. 

“If you asked me two years ago? I’d have said no. But today? After that- with you?” He smiled, opening his arms out awkwardly like a robot whose arms weren’t oiled enough, creaking from the strain. 

Lilya smiled at her receptionist who had a warm expression on her face at the heartfelt interaction. The man had come leaps and bounds into himself since he’d started seeing her. 

“Cousin? Are you alright?” 

Lilya looked up, stiffening as she pulled out of the friendly embrace. She turned and saw the face of the man she literally ran out on, fresh as a daisy, and her in her day old clothing and with his cologne still on her skin. 

“Yes, I’m fine. Well. Closer to being fine anyway, thanks to Dr. de Riva here,” Lucanis grinned at her, pushing her toward the door to meet his cousin. “Dr de Riva, this is my cousin, Illario. I’ve spoken about him before.” 

Lilya paled and swallowed, nodding at the taller man who was staring at her in shock. 

“She… she’s your doctor?” 

“This is… Illario?” 

Lucanis smiled and encouraged the two to shake hands, completely oblivious to the weird tension that came upon the two most important people in his life. 

“Um… nice to meet you doctor… Lucanis has told me so much about you,” Illario said, finally finding his tongue. He held out his hand and waited for her to take it. 

Lilya blinked at it and only forced out of her daze when her receptionist cleared her throat. “Um, yes. Yes, of course! Hello- nice to meet you too, Illario.” 

He smiled at her widely, his thumb caressing the back of her hand. 

“Lucanis has told me all about you, too.” 

His smile faltered. 

Shit. 

——— 

Just over three months. Just three. And his cousin still would not forgive him. 

For the third time that week, Illario had tried to visit Lucanis and beg for his forgiveness. How could he have possibly known that the woman he randomly met at a bar and had sex with was his therapist? He had never met the woman before! Would that have made him stop? No. But he would have at least had a definite pause before doing what he did. There would have been a pause! Unfortunately, his cousin did not appreciate the ‘theoretical pause’ and slammed the door in his face once again. 

Because of their little interlude, the doctor- Lilya de Riva ( which he only found out after a thorough thrashing he got from his cousin) - had cancelled all upcoming appointments with Lucanis, saying some ridiculous thing about her not being able to ethically treat him moving forward and that there could be no room for bias and whatnot… She then referred him to an Associate Professor Emmrich Volkarin, told him that he was famous in their field and she even studied under him. That he was so renowned that his patients swore he was so perceptive that he could hear thoughts they didn’t dare speak, giving them agency to find real acceptance and peace. Even with all that, his cousin was furious at the situation. At him.  “I trusted her, Illario! She was a confidante, someone I could talk to about anything without judgement or worry she was trying to find an angle to exploit. She was opening doors I had long thought were closed off and you, you slammed them all shut again!” 

He had punctuated that particular discussion with another slam of the door. 

And people thought he was dramatic. 

Illario sighed and left the cup of coffee from Cafe Pietra on the welcome mat and walked back down to the town car waiting for him. It had been three months since Lucanis had joined him going to and from work. Three months with Caterina hounding him to ‘fix his cousin’. Three months since he had last seen her. 

Illario raised his eyebrows in a quick thank you to his chauffeur for opening the door and slipped into the corner of the seat, his right knee perched upon the leather upholstery without Lucanis frowning at him to move his damn leg. He took a sip of his lukewarm coffee and tried to forget about the pretty girl smiling at him at the bar. Bright green eyes, long raven hair and a grin that could light up even the darkest corners of a club. 

He had every intention of chatting her up on his own and then she giggled and picked him up. Illario was suddenly very grateful for the company car breaking down that had caused him to wait at the nearest establishment to kill time before his taxi came. The girl wasn’t after his money, not by the expensive suit she wore or by the wallet full of cash and black credit card he spied when she paid her tab. She didn’t know his name, and she had clearly already been there for a long time before him which meant she wasn’t hanging out trying to catch him specifically. 

No, this woman just thought he was attractive, and that was really attractive to him. 

Illario scoffed at himself as he finished off his coffee, wincing at the last of the tepid liquid. He was being stupid. It was a one night stand, he had had so many before, he didn’t know why this one refused to leave him. He’d find himself thinking about it whenever his mind wandered- in between his grandmother nagging him, his cousin berating him, his constant responsibilities within their company- she’d slip right in, uninvited. 

He’d remember her laughter, the way she kicked off her designer shoes without a care and didn’t complain at the bites and marks he left on her body. The way she seemed so in sync with him even though they’d barely said a word to each other- it was madness that he was hung up on her, acting like she was someone he had a relationship when for all intents and purposes, he probably wouldn't be able to identify her in a line up if pressed. 

You’re such a bad liar, you can’t even lie to yourself. Pathetic. 

He banged his fist against the door, ignoring the way the driver looked up at him in the rearview mirror. His memories of her were more vivid than any of his other flings or so called relationships. Knew how small her hands were compared to his, the feel of the skin on her neck, the heat of her curled against his body when she slept. He could barely remember Zara and he had dated her for more than two years. Illario groaned at the thought of the heinous witch, thanking the universe for allowing him the clarity to let that woman go when he did. Poison. That was what she was. He should have listened to Lucanis when he told him as much. 

Then he met her. Miss- no, Doctor, Illario, respect her accomplishments-- Doctor de Riva and he was reduced to a sad, pining mess. He had tried to talk to her, to speak on behalf of his cousin to continue treating him, and when she refused to take his calls at her office, he was relegated to speaking to her perky secretary who said she was unable to speak to him and to leave him number and she would return his call. She never did. He just wanted to talk to her. Prove to himself that he was just imagining things and there wasn’t anything special there, that he wasn’t missing out something he had long convinced himself was not for people like him. At least not when Caterina had planned out both his and Lucanis’ lives to a tee. Butterflies in his stomach and fluttering hearts for pretty girls with a smile he still dreamed about were not things his grandmother cared about. 

The car stopped and Illario checked over his reflection, double taking when he thought he saw the beginnings of a grey streak on his temple, breathing easier when he realised it was just a smudge on the window. All the stress he was under was not good for him. 

It was probably best for him to try to find a therapist. 

And he knew just the one he wanted to speak to. 

——— 

The car door swung open and Illario stepped out, ensuring he took the dossier he had been studying for the last four days before his meeting with the Cantori Family, the largest entertainment agency in the country. Nights spent poring over their figures for the last ten years and dismantling their biggest wins and losses had left him exhausted, but he was prepared and knew that this partnership would be of benefit to both their companies- and maybe then Nonna dearest would finally get off his back. Until she found something new to bug him about. Or remember something old. She wasn't picky when it came to busting his balls. 

The elevator opened and a familiar, sickly sweet scent assaulted his nose, his mouth twisting with obvious distaste. He hadn't smelled that perfume since- 

Fucking fuck on a fucking cracker. 

“... Zara.”

She was like a demon or something. If he said her name or thought about her enough times, she would be summoned to haunt him forever. 

“Amatus!” she squealed, bopping on the spot in her excitement to see him. “It has been so long, why have you not returned any of my calls?” Illario turned to his driver and stopped him from coming with him, not wanting another person to be subjected to whatever she had planned. He needed to have a long chat with their security team. How they could have missed a psychopath in their building waiting around in an elevator, riding it for goodness knows how long obviously waiting for someone was beyond him. Someone’s head was going to roll for the oversight. Preferably Zara’s, but he was too pretty to face prison over the likes of her. He stepped into the elevator, his skin already crawling from the idea of spending more than 20 floors in her company in such a confined space with her specific brand of bat-shit crazy. 

“Oh, I don't know why, Zara. Maybe because we broke up eight, no, nine months ago! How do you keep getting my numbers? I’ve changed it five times!” She pouted as if she didn’t hear him, which was probable, the woman only ever heard what she wanted to and whenever she heard otherwise- she would do everything in her power to change it. And whether he liked to admit it or not, the Renata family was powerful, holding too much stock in the Venatori venture capitalist group- almost making the wench untouchable. Almost. 

“Silly boy. You know my brother Calivan likes to keep tabs on everyone for me. I’ve left so many messages and still you won't call. Are you still playing hard to get?” His hand gripped around the folder, papers wrinkling under his hold. “I have not placed a restraining order on you Zara, out of respect for your family and your position, but if you do not stop this, I will do it. I have no qualms about dragging your ass through the dirt if it means you will finally leave me and my family alone.” Zara’s sweet smile turned sour, her top lip curling into the same sneer she made when he broke up with her. The smaller woman pushed him into the back wall of the elevator, pressing her body against his as if that were enough to coax him back to her bed. The witch had him convinced that she cared for him, that she wanted him to reach his full potential, and would help him to be the one Caterina chose to succeed her. He didn’t want to listen to Lucanis who tried to tell him she had attempted to seduce him and when rejected by his cousin, she went to him. He tried to tell him that she was obsessed with the Dellamorte family since university, and she didn’t care if she got in through either of them. There was something grander afoot than either of them knew but Lucanis knew they should not get into bed with Zara, and definitely not with the Venatori. But Illario was always stubborn. And it took almost allowing some Venatori executives to strong arm their way into their inner sanctum for him to wake up and realise that his cousin was right (he was always right, he was Lucanis ‘Maker-Blessed-and-can-do-no-wrong’ Dellamorte.) 

Zara dragged her blood red nails along his neck, her mouth too close to his for his comfort. “Don't deny me, Illario,” she cooed, pressing her hips into his, “we were together for three years-”

“-Two! We've been broken up for nearly a year!-” “-what we have is special. No-one knows you like I do. No-one understands you and what you crave like me. No-one can love you… not like I can.” Illario swallowed. She never learned. Always using his insecurities against him and trying to make him believe he was the lesser Dellamorte. But he had learned better. Even met someone who seemed to click with him, more than he ever expected to with such a brief meeting. It wasn’t just the sex, though the sex was… the sex had been something else, but the way they held each other through the night, the wordless way they knew what the other needed and the genuine way she smiled at him- like she'd always known him- it was like she was literally dreamed to existence just for him. “Ahh, see, I knew it! There’s the Illario I know and love. Always up and ready- I knew you still wanted me. Loved me. You will for the rest of your life,” she grinned, incorrectly assuming his hardening cock was because of her. Her long fingers trailed down his body and he wanted to be ill, the feel of her touching him forcing every hair on his body to rise in revulsion. 

He pushed back firmly, keeping his hand between them to ensure she stayed away. “I don’t love you. I don’t want you. This was just my body reacting to the thought of someone I actually desire.” She scoffed, her pretty features darkening with jealousy. “You’re not with anyone else- there’s no way you’ve moved on from what we had. What we have!” The elevator bell rang and the doors opened to the top floor, reserved only for his family’s offices. “There was nothing then, nothing now and nor will there ever be, leave or you will be escorted out!” he snapped, walking out hurriedly, hoping to escape her. “Don't you walk away from me Illario Dellamorte! You’d be nowhere without me, just some piddling paper pusher in your grandmother’s company behind your cousin. I made you someone!” she shrieked, eyes glassy, as if she could feel actual emotion. The god damned ghoul. 

He could not let that slide. His pride would not allow it. “Listen here you knuckle dragging thundercunt. I was always someone. And I am better for not having you in my life, you are nothing but rot. Anything you touch is infected with it. It took me long enough to realise that you were killing me from the inside out- I will never want you. And if by some horrible luck I do think of you, it will only be with regret, for losing two years of my life beside a disease parading around in human skin. Get. Out.”

Illario felt lighter than he had in months releasing that tirade upon his bloody ex. Did she deserve it?... Eh, kinda. But he had been so pent up for the last couple of months he had to unleash it on someone. Who better than her?! “No, I don’t accept this!” she cried out, her heels clicking on the floor behind him. “You’re just upset, it’s okay. We can talk it out and we’ll be stronger, Amatus, you’ll see. I was just angry and said some things I didn’t mean. Of course you were, are, someone. I wouldn’t want to be with you if you weren’t.” 

That’s even worse, you daft bitch.

“I’ve told you. I’ve moved on! I don’t want you anywhere near me, her or my family- do you understand?” he called out over his shoulder, ignoring the worried looks from the PA’s scattered around the floor. “Fletcher, get security on the line. Get this woman escorted out immediately. She is not to be allowed near the premises, understood? And set up a meeting with the de Acutis’- I want to know how she even got in!” “Yes, Illario. Right away,” they answered, automatically picking up the phone. Zara rushed over to Fletcher's desk and tore the handset from their hand and slammed it back down, earning an unimpressed glare from them. “Great, now I’ll have to disinfect my phone.” 

The woman skittered after Illario, cursing after one of her heels snapped from under her, calling out to him as she collected herself. “There’s no one else. Stop lying to me. If you want me to apologise, I’ll apologise. Don’t just cut me out of your life for no good reason!”  He almost turned around again, too tempted to strangle her with his bare hands, until he saw her. Same long, dark hair. Creamy skin and bright eyes. Mercy, he could see the green of them from where he stood. She was standing outside his office, looking far too tempting in a simple shift dress and heels than she probably meant to.

“Mr Dellamorte, I hope you forgive my intrusion, but my assistant refused to continue working for me unless I managed to stop you from calling my rooms,” she explained, her arms linked behind her back, pushing her chest forward and creating the most alluring line of curves down her body. “Would you have a minute to spare for me?”

He spied Zara turning the corner, hissing his name.

Illario looked back to Lilya, who was looking at the crazed, hobbling woman coming toward them with a furrowed brow, confusion and apprehension apparent on her beautiful face. He handed the dossier to a nearby assistant and turned back to his unexpected guest, flashing her with what he hoped was a charming, but apologetic grin.

“Certainly. I’ll even give you two minutes. But until then, I pray you forgive me, Doctor.”

And before she could ask what she needed to forgive him for, he promptly pulled her into a kiss.

——— 

Her lips were softer than he remembered. Plush and smooth as he moved his mouth over hers. He had intended for it to be a long, chaste peck, but then she kissed him back. Tentatively at first, like she was shy, until she felt his tongue lick at the seam between her lips, and she responded in kind. Illario couldn’t believe his luck when her arms linked around his neck, and she stepped closer to him, her hips pressed against his own. 

If he were being completely honest, he had totally forgotten that she-beast Zara was still in the room. That was, of course, until she grew a second head and started screeching out of it. Or at least that's what it sounded like. 

“Illario Dellamorte! Who the hell is she?!” she shrieked, stomping her way closer to them. Much to his surprise, Lilya stepped beside him and held his hand, an action that Zara did not miss, causing even more unpleasant, indignant noises to erupt from her. “How could you do this to me?” 

Lilya looked up at Illario, a wary expression on her face as her eyes darted between him and Zara. “I… I’m not sure what’s going on here. Illario, who is this woman?” 

Seeing as he was probably already going to be killed by Dr de Riva as it was, he didn’t see the problem in dying a second time over if it meant that he’d finally get the crazy ex off his back. Besides- if he was going to hell, he may as well enjoy the descent as much as he could. He hushed her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders protectively, drawing her into his side. His other hand smoothed down her long locks and held her face tenderly, concern playing across his handsome features. 

“Lilya? Mi Amor- are you okay?” 

Oh, he was asking to be kicked in the balls by this woman. When they finally got to speak to each other alone, it would just be two minutes of her just kicking the shit out of him. 

She blinked but recovered quickly and nodded, her small hands curling into the lapels of his navy overcoat as though she were nervous, or possessive, or both. He had to hand it to the doctor; she quickly cottoned on to what he needed from her and played her part well, considering she had only witnessed the brief interaction between him and Zara. Another pang of guilt hit him for being the cause of his cousin’s no longer being able to be treated by her, but it was almost worth it to see Zara almost go full exorcist mode. He only hoped she wouldn’t start puking up pea soup all over the carpet. Caterina had insisted on the white carpet and would be terribly put out to see it stained. 

Zara yelled out his name again, and he ignored her, captivated by the clear green irises that were staring up at him. He’d dreamed of her eyes for weeks, seeing them up close and in the light of day, he knew he’d be dreaming of them for many more. When he continued to disregard her, the woman rifled through her bag and threw her phone at his face. If he hadn’t been eye fucking the pretty doctor in his arms and been in the right state of mind, he might’ve stepped aside - but instead, he was beaned right on the corner of his eye. Say what you would about Zara, the bitch could aim. 

“Fuck. That was meant for you, you homewrecking whore!” 

Then again, maybe not.  

“Hey, ‘Lario, can you see me? How many fingers am I holding up?” she asked, her tone serious, with two fingers held up in front of him. He answered, and she smiled, wincing at what she knew was going to be one hell of a shiner. Once she was satisfied that he wasn’t in any immediate danger, she stepped out in front of him, like she was the one protecting him. 

“I am not a homewrecking whore. You are just a woman who can’t come to grips with reality. This man does not want you-” 

“You’re wrong!” 

“I assure you, I am not.” 

“Illario isn’t seeing anyone. He’s just doing this to make me feel bad for the rough patch we’ve had-” 

Lilya scoffed, a cold, heartless noise he would have never thought would come out of her. He almost got hard just thinking about her being so ruthless. Fuck… maybe he really did need to see a therapist. Who the hell in their right mind got off on that? 

“My dear Miss… Zara, was it?” Lilya asked, knowing full well what the woman’s name was. “You said that throw was for me; I suggest you leave with the kind security guards heading our way now- lest I show you the damage proper aim can do. And trust me, I never miss a target.” 

Yep. He was hard. He was going to go to hell with an erection and a stupid grin on his face, and he didn’t even care. He pulled Lilya back and held her waist from behind, placing a kiss to her temple as he kept his eyes on Zara, the security doing their best not to manhandle the irate woman, knowing who she was. 

“I told you, Zara,” he began, curling his arms around her in a full embrace, “I’ve moved on. We’re over. You have no business with me, her or the company, so you must leave the premises. If you are seen here again, without express invitation from me or my family, I will press charges. Do you understand?” 

The woman stood still, her shoulders heaving up and down from her heavy breaths and glared at him. If he didn’t know better, it felt like he was being hexed by her stare alone. She didn’t answer him; instead, she pulled her arms free from the guards’ loose hold and walked out of the office, security following closely to ensure she was escorted from the building. 

Illario sighed deeply once Fletcher confirmed they had gone into the elevators, and the rest of the office returned to their business as normal, only a few people shooting him and the random woman curious glances as they continued working.  Lilya turned around and tenderly touched the reddened area around his eye socket, flinching empathetically when he did. She went to his EA’s desk and kindly asked if it was possible to get some ice and ibuprofen for him, and then led him into his own office. After surveying the layout, she determined that the couch was the best place for him to sit and gently helped him to it - not that he was unable to do so himself, but he found that he didn’t mind being led or cared for. It had been years since anyone who wasn’t Lucanis had looked out for him. 

...Had anyone apart from Lucanis ever looked out for him? 

He was lost in thought when a cold punch hit him in the face, and he exclaimed, shaken free from his downward spiral. 

“Oh, stop being such a baby, it’s only ice,” she soothed, a wry smile playing at her lips. Right. Those lips. Sinful, pouting, pliant - “So, I’m going to assume that was your ex? Clingy? Unable to understand that you’re broken up? Obsessive? She needed to see you with another woman to move on, so you used someone she didn’t know in the heat of the moment to get your point across, which just so happened to be me. Am I close?” 

“Yes, yes. You’re a genius and a good judge of character…” he grinned, grimacing for a second when his eye smarted. To her credit, she only smiled briefly at his pain and continued icing his injury. “Correct, Mr. Dellamorte, on all fronts,” she whispered, holding his gaze. “So that begs the question you should be asking…” “And what is that, Doc?” he chuckled, ignoring the pain in his cheek. It was easy to do so when he could easily smell the perfume that had long faded from his bedsheets, warming the air around him. 

“What does my impeccable judgement tell me about you?”  His smile faded. Hers grew. 

“I’m not going to like what you say next, am I?” he groaned playfully, taking over the icing duties, instantly mourning the loss of her touch. She sat back on the couch and laid her hands on top of each other on her lap, the woman he held in his arms retreating behind her professional facade once more. Suddenly, his attraction to her ability to smoothly switch to callousness dimmed when it was focused on him. 

“Probably not, no. I think now that… the debacle outside has played out… it is time I take those two minutes you promised me.” “Well, you’ve certainly earned them.” “Well done, me,” she retorted with a smile so sharp it could cut him in two. “You need to stop calling my office. My poor assistant, Bellara, has threatened to quit if she hears your voice on the other end of the phone one more time.” Illario raised his left hand in surrender. “Scouts honour, no more calls to your office.” 

“You’re meant to raise your right hand for that,” she clicked her tongue with faux disappointment, a shadow of the warm smile he could look at for hours playing across her mouth. 

“I’m injured, take pity,” he pouted, earning him an earnest laugh. She motioned for him to remove the ice pack, and she leaned in to inspect his face, so close he could just kiss her again, but she retreated as quickly as she came. 

“Hmm... shan't. For it is my expert opinion that you will, in fact, live. Congratulations, Mr. Dellamorte, you can continue being the best-dressed rake this side of town.” “Ouch. That one hurt, Doc. Isn’t your first rule to do no harm?” “Helping you take your ego down a peg or two is not doing harm. It’s a kindness to the rest of the world. I should get a medal,” she stated audaciously. “So now that we’ve confirmed that you are, in fact, not dying, and you’ve promised that you will no longer politely harangue my assistant, I shall bid you a good day. I leave with the sincere recommendation for you to please get examined by a doctor, especially if your symptoms get worse.” 

Illario cleared his throat, his grin already telling Lilya exactly what he was going to say next. 

“You’re a doctor. Please feel free to examine me once again, as thoroughly as needed. Doctor’s orders and all that.” 

She laughed again, her head thrown back like she hadn’t laughed in years. 

“You know what, sure. I could do that,” Lilya positioned herself between his legs and bent down until they were face to face, her hand supporting his chin, thumb unconsciously caressing his freshly shaved jaw. “Hmm, you’re right, you do need a follow-up. You should call my office and… oh wait… You can’t. What a shame. Good day, Mr. Dellamorte.” 

She tipped his chin back gently with a wide grin and sauntered off, completely aware that he was watching each step she took out of his office, and what she assumed was out of his life. But if there was one thing Illario Dellamorte knew, it was whether a deal would be worth the risk and effort it took to pursue, and Lilya de Riva was exactly the kind of risk he wanted to take.  

——— 

Did she have to swing her hips from side to side as she walked out of his office? No. Did she want to turn back around and just give in to it all, climb on top of him, and make out like rabid teenagers for the rest of the day? Maybe let him get to third base a little? Yes. Yes.

Should she have? 

Absolutely not. 

Things were already messy, and the last thing anyone needed was for her to complicate things further. She had gotten what she wanted from her visit, which was that Illario would cease contacting her rooms. However, a part of her was going to miss Bellara coming into her office with an assortment of Post-its, all dated with slightly different, but inherently similar messages from him scrawled on them. 

‘Sorry about everything, Doc. Please give me a call so I can apologise to you properly.’

‘I didn’t mean to mess up my cousin’s treatment with you- for what it’s worth, you did help him. I feel terrible. Please let me make it up to you, because he certainly won’t let me make it up to him.’

‘Hey Doc, don’t know if your assistant is actually giving you any of these. If she is, would you mind calling me back just so I know that you have some competent help there? I can always send you a new PA as an apology for everything.’

It was the last message that had Bellara threatening to quit if she didn’t get Illario in line. Still, good help was hard to find, and Bellara had so much promise that she wanted to ensure she had the best leg up - and that was made possible by working with her. Bellara was able to access resources that the average student didn’t have, browsing through exclusive online journals and textbooks between her patient’s visits. She also found it much easier to study in her quiet rooms with little distraction. Lilya shuddered to think how difficult it would be if she were working at the mall or in a restaurant. 

But still… she shouldn’t have let herself get swept up in the whirlwind that was Illario Dellamorte. Allowing herself to play along with that charade to free himself from his jilted ex-lover was careless of her… she didn’t do chaotic, and yet there she was diving headfirst into the trash heap that was his life. 

Oh that was judgemental. You can’t base his entire character on what Lucanis said about him; you know better. You should know better! 

She hailed a taxi and slid in, sighing with disappointment at herself. She was a doctor, a psychiatrist, a damned good one - but she was human too. There was no denying there was something unexplainable about whatever connection they shared. It wasn’t love at first sight by any means, but it ran deeper than just lust. Though… When he kissed her earlier, it took everything in her not to pull him onto the nearest desk and demonstrate to the entire office just how over Zara he well and truly was. 

Lilya grumbled at herself, squeezing her hands tightly to get a hold of herself. It wasn’t like her to fantasise about a man, especially a man she had a one-night stand with. He was her equivalent of an earworm, hearing his voice when she was in bed, always when she was just about to fall asleep - his grunts, his moans, the rasp deep in his throat when he asked if she was close and - no. She had spent too much time recalling that one night to help her get through the lonely evenings, and she was a little scared that she had become dependent on him, dependent on the memories of him. 

That was why she theorised that seeing him in person may be the end to all her worries. She would see that he was just a man, and her mind was likely inflating him to impossible heights to help her get off. 

But then he came in with his perfect hair, tanned, broad and dripping with confidence and charm- and then he kissed her. 

All the feelings came rushing back to her against her will. The time she spent in the arms of a man who seemed to read her mind and fulfil every carnal need she had, someone who appeared to be genuinely excited to get to know her, rather than just being relieved to see her getting dressed and running out of his life. What was holding her back? It wasn’t expressly forbidden to see him now that his cousin was no longer her patient, but it felt so unethical to even think about it. She wouldn’t hurt Lucanis any more than he had already been. It was why she hadn’t returned his calls; she didn’t think she was strong enough to say no to him again. 

Her phone buzzed in her hand, and she looked down to see a text appear. 

“My fucking meeting was postponed until next week. Tell me something good?”  

Teia. She had told her about this meeting and said that it would be life-changing; there was no doubt her friend was annoyed it had been delayed. “Good? No patients today. Probably staying at home and eating whatever is not growing mould in my fridge and pretending I’m not two seconds away from adopting all the cats and dogs at my local pound so I can complete my transition into a hermit with an army of pets.” 

Her reply was instantaneous, and forced Lilya to stifle a giggle in the back seat of the cab. 

“Nice. If you find a small dog that will terrorise your brother for me, please let me know. I’m so sick of his damn obsession with his snake.” 

“Please tell me that’s not a euphemism for his penis.” “... Then I guess we should change the topic.”

“I’m going to stop talking to you now.” 

Lilya was about to put her phone into her bag when she was reminded of the phone that was hurled at Illario’s handsome face and how warm and smooth his skin was under her hands. She flicked herself as hard as she could, yelping at the sting and ignoring the way the driver gave her some wicked side eye. She was going to go home and forget the day had happened at all, and just watch a random show as she doom scrolled on her phone. A day of self-care. One that did not include illicit thoughts of a certain tall, gorgeous man with the bluest eyes she had ever seen and fucked like a demon- at this rate, she, her dirty little memories and her recently charged friend in her nightstand were going to have another sordid interlude. 

No. 

She pulled out her phone and opened up a new message. 

“Neve… do you feel like coming out with me tonight? Anywhere you want.” 

If one random encounter got her this way… perhaps another random encounter with a completely different person would help her exorcise him from her life. 

“How about The Diamond? I’ve heard good things about it. Bit up market, nothing like The Swan back home, so it’s right up your alley. I was going to meet someone there tonight. Did you want to meet up with us there?” 

The Diamond. That was where she met Illario in the first place. Well, maybe that was where she could leave him behind. 

——— 

She had to ask herself again if she was heading down a self-sabotaging spiral. She had spent an embarrassing amount of time getting herself ready and choosing between which little black dress didn’t scream out ‘desperate’ but also didn’t say ‘prude’- and settled for the fitted mid-length, off the shoulder satin number, with a noticeable slit on the front of her thigh. Enough to tell people she was happy for them to look, but she wasn't going to provide the whole show without a little bit of effort from them. 

Lilya almost changed her mind three times on her way there, but she knew if she didn’t actively do something about her needs, she’d be compelled to do something stupid. She was a proponent of the phrase ‘physician, heal thyself,' and she wanted to believe that by tackling the problem head-on, it would finally get her back on track and leave the past behind her. She could call this foray into questionable decisions a part of her self-care regime, that finding someone willing to indulge her in a night of frivolity and hedonism, with no questions asked and no strings attached, would be a cure-all to her unending fantasies about a certain Casanova. 

The Diamond was infinitely busier than the last time she came with Teia. Bodies were pressed up against each other as the crowd tried to move to and from the dance floor and the bar; the bass of the song thumping so hard that she almost mistook it for her own heartbeat.

Lilya surveyed the club and managed to make out the familiar silhouette of her best friend at the corner of the bar, the bright lights that illuminated the benchtops, accentuating her sharp jaw and highlighting the white of her shirt. She giggled when she noticed she had also worn a fabulous (but ridiculous) fascinator to the club. Bless her. 

Neve, astute as always, turned just in time to see her across the room and raised her eyebrows in a subtle greeting. Lilya moved through the people and suddenly remembered why she had stopped going to places like this in her 30s. It was because she detested large groups of people. Add copious amounts of alcohol, lust and drugs, and they were a horde of mindless beasts looking for another creature to rut upon.

She paused when she realised that was also precisely what she had intended to do that night. Minus the excessive drugs and alcohol. Was that any better? Is being a carnally charged animal better when one wasn’t wasted? In her professional opinion?... Oh screw her professional opinion. She wasn’t out as Dr de Riva. She was just Lilya there. After one more ‘excuse me!’, she was able to find herself next to Neve, who quickly passed a shot glass that she downed without hesitation, causing her friend’s mouth to quirk into a sly smirk.

“I could have slipped something in that, you know.”

“As if you’d need it to get me into bed.”

“Touché.” 

“So, who were you meant to be meeting?”

“Already met him. He’s an informant of mine; he said he’d only meet here as he had some business to attend to, and I had to work around his schedule. Criminals these days, no bloody manners.”

Lilya stole the bottle of liquor Neve held and poured herself another shot, nursing the liquid in small sips. “And you thought dragging your poor defenceless civilian friend along was a great idea?”

Neve smirked, toying with her cigarette holder between her fingers, Lilya knowing her friend was probably itching for a smoke as she always did whenever she drank. “You? Defenceless? Miss ‘My brother is probably having me tailed’?”

Lilya groaned. Her stepbrother was the paranoid type, and ever since he took over the family business, he had become even more wary of the people she associated with. Telling her at every chance to be more cautious, to stop being so trusting, and to make sure to take tester kits wherever she went, to ensure the water they served wasn't poisoned. 

“He stopped doing that years ago.”

“He did?”

“Mhmm. I made one of his little spies cry and sent him back home with his tail between his legs. I told him I would do that to each and every person he sent.” 

“Fantastic. I’ll drink to that!”

“You’d drink to me just blinking.”

“And it wouldn’t even be the first time I did,” the detective smirked and raised her glass to her, rolling it along her cheek with the palm of her hand before deftly pouring the alcohol into her mouth. Neve tapped on the bar and pointed to both the ladies’ and smokers’ rooms, only waiting a moment for Lilya to shake her head before effortlessly disappearing into the crowd.

She poured herself the last of the Gran Patròn and smiled to herself. Neve was not one to normally spend so frivolously; even on a detective’s salary, she fed most of her money back into her community. This bottle alone would have cost her at least $700, and she had known this woman since university; that $700 was better served in Dock Town, not in the bottom of a toilet bowl after a night of binge drinking. Whoever her informant was, they were generous with both their intel and their money. 

Lilya turned around and leant against the bar, resorting to what she did whenever she was alone in public. She people-watched. She smiled at the group of young women out celebrating a bachelorette party. A lovely thing in the middle was dressed in white, wearing a plastic bejewelled tiara on her head and a satin sash across her body, with “bride to be” written in bright pink lettering. There was a large group of finance bros or lawyer types, all suited up and congratulating themselves on the deals they had closed, vying to be the most lavish amongst each other to prove something about the size of their bank accounts.

Then she happened to look across to where some of the semi-private booths were, and there was a man watching her intently, his shot glass halfway to his mouth. He smirked at her and raised his arm in a toast, and she joined him, about to drink, when he motioned for her to stop abruptly. She laughed and waited as the mysterious man had asked, doing her best to look quizzically at him, silently asking for permission to drink. He shook his head and wiggled the index finger of his free hand to her, Lilya almost hearing him tut at her. 

He stood up, to the disappointed cries of the party around him, and he waved them off, shouting back what she could only assume were obscenities for his friends to shut up. He made his way to her, with all the confidence and swagger of someone she knew she would be attracted to… then as he drew closer to her, his features became clearer under the brighter lights. 

He could have passed as another bloody Dellamorte. Same high cheekbones, a strong nose, and thick, dark, lustrous hair. He was bloody gorgeous. The sharp ring of their glasses snapped her out of her daze, to find him thoroughly enjoying having her undivided attention. 

“Sorry, it seemed a shame to miss an opportunity to share a toast with a beautiful woman,” he said, clinking his glass against hers once more.

Lilya sat up straighter, trying to think if she should entertain the wicked idea forming in her head. If she could not be with Illario Dellamorte, perhaps she could scratch the itch with someone who kinda - kinda really - looked like him and simulate some sort of closure that way. Was it healthy? Was it something she would recommend to one of her patients? Of course bloody not. But she was not her patient, and she was still human and fallible. There was nothing unethical about her sleeping with someone who looked like her former-patient’s cousin… if there was, god damn it, the ethics committees these days needed to get laid too. 

“Oh, you wanted a beautiful woman? You just missed her; she just went to the bathroom. But she’ll be back soon if you want to wait. Until then, you’re welcome to put up with the likes of me,” she smiled, gesturing to the empty seat next to her.

The stranger chuckled and shook his head, pointing at her cheekily. “Ah, you caught onto my game, I am so ashamed. I guess I should do the honourable thing and talk to you and get to know you, maybe even buy you a drink or two to make up for my terrible behaviour… Miss-?”

Lilya took a second to think about what she was about to do, weighing up the pros and cons of following through with her hormone-fuelled plan.

“Lilya,” she replied, her smile growing as his widened at learning her name. “And yes, a drink, or two, would be the very least you could do after humiliating me like that, Mister?”

“Another bottle of what she’s having,” he said offside to the bartender, who merely nodded dutifully. “And it’s Elek, pleasure to meet you, Lilya. Whatever you have in mind for me to undertake as an act of contrition, I would be more than happy to do,” he answered with such a honeyed tone she was already tempted to lick the side of his mouth to see if he tasted as sweet. “Buy you dinner? Achieve world peace? Cure cancer? Worship at your feet until you saw fit to let me stand again.” He poured her a glass. “Name it.”

He was probably a long-lost cousin of theirs. Their flirtier, wisecracking long-lost cousin. 

“And if I choose to never let you up from the floor? What then?” she asked teasingly, letting her eyes run up and down his body provocatively, leaving no room for interpretation of what she meant. 

It was his turn to pause as a light dusting of pink spread through his cheeks, which she knew had nothing to do with the amount of liquor he had imbibed that evening. “Well then,” he began, tipping his glass back faster than he should have to savour the taste of the sipping tequila. “I would hope that you would have mercy on me… and at least give me a pillow for my knees. I may look young, but these joints just aren’t what they used to be. I would hate for you to be distracted by the sound of them cracking. I’d have to start my apology all over again.” 

Lilya burst out laughing and took a sip from her glass. 

“Alright Elek, you have my attention. Tell me about yourself,” she smiled. 

---

Illario winced when a dull pain radiated through his cheek, the bruise slowly starting to darken from the pink it was earlier that day. If it were up to him, he’d be at home icing up his damn injury but once his grandmother had told him she had taken the liberty of rescheduling the meeting he had been in charge of - he wanted to scream. He stupidly thought for a second that she had done it out of concern for his well-being, wanting her grandson to get thoroughly checked out and ensure he was fine. But no, she wanted to be certain that he couldn’t potentially ruin the merger because he wasn’t of sound mind due to his injury and/or incompetence. Old witch probably assumed that he was going to go insane over seeing Zara again. He was half tempted to tell her to do it herself or wrangle his cousin to do it instead - but he bit his tongue. As they all did when it came to Caterina. 

“If you are so eager, go see Teia yourself. She told me in passing that she will be at The Diamond sometime tonight.” 

The last thing he wanted to do was go to the same damn club he met Lilya in, not when she was literally in his hands just 12 hours earlier. It would be like an exercise of torture, and as masochistic as he could get, even he wanted no part of it, given his current foul mood.

Illario moved easily past security and was instantly assaulted by the smell of harsh colognes and too-sweet perfumes, the din of too many people talking at once, and the pulsing lights threatening to trigger a migraine when combined with his smarting cheek. He didn’t even know if Teia was there yet; he was just forced to go and wait until she appeared. Thankfully, his EA had the presence of mind to call ahead and secure a private room for him to wait in and to be advised when she would arrive. He was about to be led through the club when he picked up a familiar laugh, cutting through the brief moment of silence between tracks being played, and after only hearing it that day, he could have placed it anywhere. 

He turned his head to the sound and craned his neck, dodging around the people walking between them. 

She was there.

Laughing. 

With another man. 

She leaned in a little too closely, her right arm upon the bar to support her, the man’s arm slung low around her waist. He watched as the cocky little shit pulled her closer and whispered something in her ear which made her laugh even harder, the psychiatrist almost falling backward. Thankfully, the idiot at least had decent reflexes and caught her, taking full advantage of the situation to press her against him. Illario could feel his stomach turn, his teeth clenching at the sight. He didn’t want to see this. Didn’t want to see her from the sidelines as some other guy was lucky enough to hold her and steal a kiss from her lips, when he knew it should have been him in his place.

Illario keenly observed the couple in their not-so-private moment, fighting against himself as to whether he wanted to retch at them deepening their kiss or if he wanted to go over and smash the man’s head into the bar… and then retch on him for good measure. From his vantage point, he could see her pull back, her lips slightly swollen and her cheeks flushed with colour. Lilya said something to her companion, and he nodded, taking her hand and guiding her onto the dance floor. His feet followed them without realising, the surprised voice of the club manager fading off into obscurity as he walked away from her, to see where that man had taken his favourite physician. 

The man had chosen a free space in the middle of the floor, surrounded by so many others moving to the rhythm. He lifted her hand and encouraged her to spin, circling his arms around her to stop her, both laughing heartily. With a move so smooth even Illario had to give him props, he spun her again so her back rested against his chest, the two just swaying to the music. Illario could feel himself sneer as the man trailed his nose down the line of her neck, and he could see her enjoying it; Illario could almost hear her breathy sighs in his ears. He fumed at the hands that weren’t his, exploring the curve of Lilya’s hips and thighs as he continued to whisper things to her she obviously approved of. Illario felt himself mirror her actions, biting his lip whenever she bit hers. 

He was screaming at himself for just gawking at them, even at his lowest, he would never stoop to being voyeuristic without the other person’s knowledge – yes, he was kinky, but he wasn’t a creep - when another woman came and tapped the man on the shoulder. She was as gorgeous as she was furious; even from where he stood, he could feel the ire emitting from her. Lilya’s dance partner said his quick goodbyes and obediently followed the woman off into a dark corner, where she had taken the man by the collar and was tearing into him quite obviously. He didn’t have to hear the conversation to know the woman was warning the man never to stray close to Lilya-or perhaps any other woman-again.  The cheating bastard should have known better. 

Lilya chuckled to herself and looked around, embarrassed, her expression unsure if she should stay dancing by herself or head back to the bar. Illario watched her enraptured as her thoughts crossed over her face for him to see, her bright eyes closing as she allowed herself to get back into the beat of the song, uncaring that she no longer had a partner to join her, just happy to dance on her own until someone else stepped in. Her hips rocked from side to side as her arms went up above her head as she bounced to the music, happily carving out her own little niche on the floor until her pretty eyes opened and landed directly on him. 

---

Lilya paused, frozen to the spot as the realisation of who she was looking at dawned on her. That was not Elek. Nor was it another man who merely resembled the one who had plagued her thoughts for the last three months. It was actually him. Somehow, he had known exactly where to find her, and he was looking at her as if she were his prey. She did not move as he stalked his way over to her, all fluid lines and smooth motions like the perfect predator. 

“You look like you’re about to leap on me, Mr Dellamorte. I don’t see any errant exes lurking here in the shadows you need saving from,” she teased when he was within earshot. “Have you managed to turn into some sort of animal in our hours apart? Have you come here on the prowl as the big bad wolf?” 

Maker, she was never going to drink again. She was a bloody menace to society. 

“Well, I’m certainly not your grandmother,” he said, with the same glint in his eye that fascinated her the first time they met. 

“I’d hope not. Otherwise, I’d have to ask how you managed to get your eyesight back, Abuelita- and that might make it weird,” Lilya smiled, her hand rubbing at his chest. 

Illario could not help but break into a grin when she did not pull away from him. “All the better to see you from across the room, my dear.”  

Feeling emboldened, he closed the distance between them so they almost touched and allowed his fingers to skim up her arms, unable to conceal his delight at the way she swallowed instinctively, goosebumps rising along the path he’d travelled. He could tell she was having another internal struggle, being so close to him, torn between what she should do and what she wanted to do. His hands somehow found themselves around her waist, thumbs lightly kneading into her, her eyes darkening as they focused on his mouth. 

“What… what large hands you have.” 

“All the better to feel more of you with… My dear,” Illario played along, chuckling amusedly. He could feel her relax in his hold, and he pressed his forehead to hers, relishing the physical closeness he seemed to share so easily with her - a force of chemistry or connection he had never felt with anyone. Lilya pulled back to scan over his features, her hands ghosting over his face, fingers tracing the shape of his lips until they pulled back into a wolfish grin. 

She licked her lips. So did he. Illario could feel her breathing pick up, shallow and fast. 

“My, my,” she whispered, her mouth slyly evading his whenever he tried to kiss her again, giggling softly as he growled with every missed attempt. “What big teeth you have.” 

Illario laughed so loudly that some of the other revellers turned around at the sound. His hands shifted to cradle her face, and he pressed a kiss to her hairline, tipping his mouth toward the shell of her ear to ensure his lips feathered against the delicate skin there. “Now, now, darling Lilya. You must remember just how well I can eat you… And if you don’t… I look forward to the chance to remind you.” 

Her eyebrows softly curved upward with want, a gasp falling from her lips as her desire took over her, and he waited. They were barely a whisper apart, and if she allowed it, he would be able to kiss her without any other pretence than simply wanting to. 

She nodded. 

Illario could feel her warm breath on him, eager to taste her lips again- 

“Honestly, Lilya. I leave you alone for ten minutes, and you manage to entangle yourself with not one, but two strange men? I don’t know if I should be worried, envious or proud?” 

Lilya was released from her wayward longing the moment she heard the other woman's voice and quickly stepped away from Illario; the club was still stifling, but the air around them had turned sharp, almost glacial by contrast. She muttered her apologies and used words like ‘inappropriate’, ‘inebriated’, ‘foolish’ and 'never again' before tottering away and linking arms with her friend, the latter giving him a long but entertained look as she led them out. 

Illario shoved his fists deeply into his pockets, unsure if he’d hit someone with how wound up he felt. He counted to ten and breathed, and then did it again before letting his hands fall to his sides and walking out of the club. He couldn’t sit there and mull over what had just happened; he’d drive himself insane. Lilya’s little retreat only poured fuel on the fire already raging inside him. Whatever it was they shared, it wasn’t one-sided. It wasn’t imagined. She wanted him just as much; he felt it in every look and every breath between them. His need for her grew into something fiercer, even more consuming. He had just been chasing her before. Now, she would feel what it meant to be truly hunted by him.

——— 

Neve was a patient woman; she would wait until Lilya was ready to talk before saying anything. She had to be willing to wait in her profession; not all cases were open and shut within a day. Unfortunately, some cases took months to crack. This latest stuff with Aelia and Dock Town… urgh… No. She was not going to think about that witch any more than she had to. The detective wrapped her arms around Lilya, who was lightly shivering in the evening air, the autumn chill biting through her even with the tequila swimming through her veins, the two women huddling together for warmth, reminding Neve of their late nights trawling through different clubs in their youth and never remembering to wear jackets. Apparently, neither had grown wiser as they grew older. 

Lilya pressed her cheek against Neve’s as she tightened her hold around her waist, desperate to siphon every bit of her friend’s body heat for herself, ignoring the way the taller woman laughed at her. “I can’t believe I did that, that was just so humiliating.”  Neve squeezed Lilya in return and comfortingly rubbed her back. “Oh, don’t worry, no one else noticed. Everyone’s too wrapped up in their own stuff to worry about anyone else.”  “But I know what I did, I’ll remember it,” she whined, burying her face in her friend’s collar. “Impulse control- gone. Reasoning- non-existent. Judgment- fucked from here to kingdom come. You should just put me in solitary for the next year and let me think about what I’ve done for a good long time, to make sure I don’t go terrorising random innocent people at night and try to mount them.”

Neve snorted and pushed away from Lilya, the latter moaning the loss of warmth instantly. “People, you say. Well, those particular people, you somehow managed to entangle yourself with, in the blink of an eye, looked mighty similar there, Lil. Seems you got yourself a type.” 

Lilya was half-tempted to stomp her foot like a petulant child, but she wasn’t quite that drunk yet. Sometimes she really hated Neve’s perspicacity and frankness; between her and Teia, she never had any peace. As good a reason as any to never let them hang out together. 

“Is this because of that night you spent with that guy a while back? I remember you telling me he was all god-like bone structure, a smile that made you feel like he was already inside of you and so beautiful it made you want to cry whenever you thought about him,” she ribbed, lighting a cigarette and checking her phone to see how long their Uber would be. Her eyes flicked back up to Lilya, who had turned a vivid shade of pink as she recalled their conversation one week after their encounter. 

“I told you that in confidence, whilst I was not exactly sober for your compassion, not for you to use as ammunition to call me out for fun at your leisure!” 

“…Do you even realise who you’re talking to here, Lil?” 

“I need new friends.” 

“You need to get over this little infatuation of yours.” 

“I was trying to, then you pulled the first guy away-”

“ He was my CI! A literal criminal, Lil!” 

“He was quite gentlemanly for a criminal.” 

“He’s a professional con-man.” 

“Who can kiss.” 

“The second one looked like he could, too-”

“He can.” 

Neve paused. She was certain that she had stopped her from kissing that other handsome stranger. How could she possibly know… “Shit. Lilya… that second guy. That’s the guy, isn’t it? The one you’ve been trying to get over.” Her silence was all the answer she needed; the detective cackled at her friend’s obvious discomfort. “Oh, this is too good. Better than any trashy stories from back home, I am positively living . Please continue, give Aunty Neve all the sordid details of how he found you here and what you would have done if I hadn’t interrupted you. Leave nothing out. We have another 5 minutes before our ride is here.” 

Lilya glowered at her, tempted to beat Neve to death with her own prosthetic- just to buy enough time to avoid revealing all the gritty particulars she’d been longing to share. Nonetheless, she knew she’d be dreaming of their almost-kiss for days to come. Her skin burned with the memory of his lips under her fingertips, along her ear, and the strength in his hands as he held her body to his. Her heart was already fluttering at the most basic of recollections. If she even dared to tell Neve the things she thought about him, what she wanted to do to him and with him? She’d probably come on the spot and then die from embarrassment. And if she didn’t, Neve would make sure to put her in the coffin herself with her never-ending, sarcastic quips.  She had finally managed to string the words together to tell her to shut up and mind her own damn business when the very hands she’d been fantasising about brushed her shoulders and slid down her arms. Lilya’s eyes snapped to Neve to check if it was all in her head- but judging by her bugged-out stare, it wasn’t just some intense daydream.

“This won’t do,” he tutted against her temple, his fingers caressing the smooth skin along her biceps as he huffed out his approval. “You’re so cold, Doc. We can’t have that.” He trailed his fingertips down her arms, thrilled by the gooseflesh that rose at her nape. It took everything in him not to run his lips over it and up her neck, to make the rest of her body tingle with his kisses- but her friend looked like she’d probably burn his eyes out if he tried anything more than what she already allowed with her friend.

Illario shrugged off his jacket and carefully draped it over her shoulders, his hands running down the line of her arms once more, firmer, not meant to tease, but to remind her how he had touched her when they were alone. “Here you go, Doc. You need it more than I do. I’d offer you a ride home, but I doubt you’d accept it. I do hope you have a lovely evening.” He squeezed her hands, and she almost squeezed back, her cheek pressed against the lapel of his jacket, facing him but unable to look him in the eye. Dangerous things happened when she met his gaze. 

Then, as quickly as he appeared, he was gone. He disappeared into his town car and did not even look back at her when they drove off. 

Lilya pulled the large jacket around her frame and let herself take in the fading scent of his cologne and closed her eyes as flashes of their kiss earlier that day flooded her mind, how wonderful it felt to be back in his arms with his mouth on hers- 

Neve stared at her friend, blinking blankly. She hadn’t seen her like this about a man since she had dated Ashur, the man who broke her heart to become a priest. By her glazed-over look alone, whatever the two shared was more explosive and intense than what Lilya had with the man she was convinced she’d marry. After things ended between them, the poor girl stopped dating and focused only on her career. Sure, there were casual flings, a friendly booty call whom she trusted enough to call upon whenever human contact was a necessity- but the look on her face screamed to Neve that this was not someone she was going to get over through willpower and abstinence from him alone. 

“Oh my darling, Lilya. You went and done it.” 

She looked up at Neve with confusion, her brows furrowing together as she continued to unconsciously revel in the scent of the man, her expression gradually softening the more she inhaled his scent from his collar. “Done what?” 

“Gone and fallen for him, obviously.” 

“Wha-no! I don’t even know the man, I can’t, you don’t just- I mean I certainly don’t - people don’t do this! A-Adults don’t do this!” she spluttered, growing increasingly flustered as her vehement denials piled up, her anxiety rising with a sharp sting of what she recognised as cognitive dissonance. “... Neve.” 

The detective hushed her, extinguishing her cigarette with her heel and opened up her arms again for Lilya to snuggle back into her embrace. “Don’t worry, Lil, there are worse things than being head over heels for a guy like that.”  “... There is?” she asked, her voice muffled between them.  Neve nodded and smiled softly. “Mhmm. You could like them, and they could not know you exist. Or they know you exist, but just don’t care. Thankfully for you, that man, oh Lilya, that man looks like you’re the only thing that exists. And at the very least, I know that he has excellent taste in women… And clothes, this jacket is fabulous.”

——— 

They sat in the backseat of the Uber, and Neve was chatting about something to do with shoe polish, nail polish or Polish sausage, but she just couldn’t keep her mind from straying to a certain man with cheekbones so sharp they should have been classified as weapons. Lips so plush that she wanted to spend hours just nibbling on them and-

“... Want a napkin for your drool?”

“Huh?” she answered eloquently, turning to face her quickly, a surprised look on her dazed face. Neve laughed and leaned against the side of the door, taking a long look at her and laughing even harder. “What?! What is it?”

“You really bloody like this guy.”

“What the hell are you talking about now?” Lilya groused, shirking away and sitting with her back ramrod straight against the seat.

“You were spacing out with a dreamy look on your face. You have never done that except when you first started dating Ashur; you certainly haven't done it since. Well, I mean, except for right now, of course,” she said, leaning over to pinch her friend’s cheek and getting pinched in return. “Ah- hey! Don’t shoot the messenger! It’s not my fault you’re so repressed, you didn’t notice it!”

Lilya threatened to pinch her again, but kept her hands to herself. It was hardly fair to do so when her friend was right. She really hadn’t noticed, just told herself it was all in her head and that it was hormones and couldn’t be anything else… especially with someone like Illario Dellamorte. Even with the things she had to dismiss because it was a secondhand account from Lucanis, it didn’t mean he wasn’t splashed around in the society pages.

After her initial meeting with him, her mild obsession took over her, so she did the perfectly normal thing to do: she googled the shit out of him. He wasn’t hard to find, and he wasn’t particularly secretive about who he was and what he did. He’d been seen with different debutantes and heiresses from around the world, attending fashion shows, and of course, she’d heard his name spoken by people in her circle at times, though she never paid attention to it. They didn’t run in the same crowds, but it didn’t mean their lives couldn’t occasionally intersect. Both of them came from money; his older than hers, but both names and fortunes were well respected. Outside of their family businesses, they were unlikely to have met, except perhaps as a brief greeting at a benefit or a mutual acquaintance’s gala event.

And yet. They met. And every subsequent time they met, the feeling in her chest grew more insistent… she didn’t want to admit it, but not being able to kiss him before physically hurt, like something was torn away from her. She kept herself hidden, hiding behind the pretence of professionalism and what was right. She had followed the rules; her patient was well looked after and no longer under her care. There was no hard and fast length of time that she had to wait to start something with Illario, but still, she would need to speak to her licensing board. Was that something she wanted to do? Did she want to risk her credibility, possibly undermine people’s trust in her, just because she had a little crush? That stuff followed you forever. Was this worth the pain? Could she live without ever knowing?

“Hey Neve.”

“Hmm?”

“You wanna abuse your powers as a detective?”

Neve sent her a sidelong glance and crossed her arms. “... I’m listening.”

“You want to get me Illario’s address? If I recall correctly, he lived uptown because it only took about ten minutes to get to my clinic from his place… I don’t really remember much because I ran out of his house so quickly the last time. This way I can go there real quick and confirm whether all I’m feeling is just me being hornier than I’ve ever felt, or if I actually like him you know.. as a person and stuff.”

Their driver choked on his drink.

“Yeah… no. Not doing that for you. Surely there’s someone in your family who knows him. Just ask them. Go to his office-”

“I’m not doing that again.”

“Again? Maker, I need to be caught up on the latest gossip.”

“Thank you for nothing, you upstanding pillar of the law.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Now I’m going to have to call him.”

“...You had his number all this time?” Neve stared at her agape, shaking her head at her friend.

“Yeah?”

“And you didn’t call him?”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Damn. That’s big. Such restraint from your part.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re obviously really into him, Lil.”

“Why do you keep saying that?”

“I have eyes. They both work just fine. I may only have one leg, but both my eyes are in tip-top shape. You’re biting your lip, your right leg is bouncing nervously, and your left thumb is flicking at each fingertip- you’re nervous. You’re excited. It’s cute.”

“Shut up. Just keep smoking and ruin your eyes already, stop seeing things so well.”

“Damn. Such a hater.”

The phone was ringing and she was so close to hanging up, freaking out that she was about to get his voicemail and she didn’t know what to say. ‘Hey Illario, it’s Lilya. Uh. Dr Lilya de Riva… in case you know more Lilya’s. Anyway, Yeah. So, this is my number, and now you have it. Now, I’m going to anxious-puke into this driver’s backseat console. Bye.’ That would charm the pants right back on to him and super glue them in place.

She was going to hang up-

“Hello?”

Shit. Damn. Shit. Shit!

“...Hello?”

Lilya squeezed her eyes shut and weathered the good-natured slaps from Neve after she heard the deeper voice on the other end of the line.

“Maker, Zara, if this is you-”

“I sure hope you don’t lump me in the same boat as your ex, Mr. Dellamorte,” she replied, Neve nodding and silently snapping her fingers to amp her up. She was a shit, but she was her shit, Maker bless her. Lilya heard a surprised huff, and a delicious chuckle followed. She could imagine him dipping further into the seat of his town car, his head thrown back on the headrest, his hand deep in his pocket, and the biggest grin on his face. As if he had won a bet, and her crawling back to him was his prize.

“I would never, Doc. It hurts that you think I ever would,” he said swiftly, and Lilya could hear the smile in his voice. It almost made her want to hang up just to spite him, but that would get them nowhere. “Zara is a breed unto her own. But then again, so are you-”

“...What?!”

“She is an accident of nature. You are the pinnacle of it, hardly comparable.”

Oh, he was smooth; she would give him that.

Neve mouthed, ‘ask for his address,’ and Lilya smacked her, earning a kick in the shin from her prosthetic, and she yelped loudly, causing Illario to ask if she was okay, obvious concern flooding his tone. Her friend whispered her apologies and tried to rub her smarting leg, the commotion resulting in their hushed voices talking over each other.

“Stop it!”

‘‘No, I’m so sorry!”

“Would you stop touching me!”

“Oh, Lil, I feel terrible. I take it back, you can sleep with Elek.”

“What the hell is going on over there?” he asked, his amusement shadowed by worry that the woman might accept the offer to sleep with another man. “Lilya?!”

Lilya pushed her friend off of her and put the phone back to her ear, cursing that she would sound more winded and agitated than before. “Hi, yes, yes, I’m here! Sorry about that. If you see that a woman was killed in the back seat of her Uber, and her friend was the prime suspect, I was with you all evening? Okay?”

She heard him laugh, and she hated to admit that she liked how it sounded- deep and rich. “You got it, alibi secured, you were with me all night- murder away.”

Lilya paused and reminded herself that fortune only favoured the brave. “Do… Do you think we could make that alibi… real?” she said, instantly smacking her forehead to her palm, if that didn’t sound like the worst way to invite herself over for a booty call, she didn’t know what was.

A long stretch of silence played on between them as Illario processed what she had said.

“Um… hello?”

“Yeah, I’m here, Doc.”

“It’s fine. Ignore me. I just… I’m going to go- I’m so sorry to call you so late-”

“I’ll text you my address… unless you want to text me yours?”

“I… we’re not going to have sex!” she blurted out, Neve snorting in the background, and again, Illario laughed.

“Well, that’s a shame, but I figured as much. I’ll send it to you now, see you soon,” he said, promptly hanging up.

---

The woman never failed to surprise him.

Just half an hour ago, he had formulated a plan to win the woman over; he was going to break down her walls, systematically destroy every argument she had to oppose him, and bend every rule there was to get to her. Nothing was going to stop him.

Except her, apparently. Beating him to the punch.

His driver pulled out in front of his building as instructed, and Illario sat back and laughed.

---

Lilya finished fixing herself up - “Yeah, you’re definitely not here to have sex aye, Lil, there’s another reason why you’re pushing your tits up and over your dress” - and pressed call icon under his name, wedging the phone between her ear and shoulder as she climbed out of the car. She didn’t even hear one full ring before it cut off to his voicemail, the generic robotic voice telling her to leave a message, and she hung up, ready to text him back saying she was in front of his building.

“Fancy seeing you here, Doc.”

It was unfair that the man moved so smoothly that he made walking look like he was dancing. She was so entranced by him that he had almost made it to the front of the Uber.

“N-No, wait, stop!” she called out, arm out in front of her, shocking the man to pause with a confused look. “I just… You need to be over there, and I need to be here.”

Illario stuck his tongue in his cheek and grinned, trying not to snicker. “Oh, you do? I wonder why that is?”

“Oh, don’t tease me, Mr Dellamorte,” she sassed him back, hugging his jacket tighter around him, which for some reason he seemed to approve of.

“Why not? You know from experience just how good at it I am.”

He licked at his incisor, and Lilya was tempted to tell him to stop doing that, but she knew he’d relish it far too much. Because she would, if she were in his shoes. Lilya pressed her lips together and shooed him back, Illario raising his arms with his elbows bent in question as he stepped backward until he was in line with the back of his car. “Alright… that’s… that’s far enough.”

“I’m sorry- are you talking? I can’t hear you from over here in Orlais,” he called out, shoving his hands into his pockets. Maker. She hadn’t noticed before but he had rolled up his sleeves and she could see his toned forearms, part of her remembering how some of his veins had become more visible when he had held her up by her hips and she- damn it.

“Just… please, you owe me, remember?” she said, with enough edge to her voice that made Illario drop his usual tone. He gently dipped his head to show he yielded and stood there quietly, waiting for her next move. “I don’t know… whatever it is this is that seems to be between us,” she started, searching for the right words, “but… it will not let me be. I am not too proud to say that you have been on my mind more than I care to admit. But I am not sure if that’s just because we have good chemistry, or if there’s an actual connection there. And I need to know.”

Illario tilted his head to the side and appraised her, unsure of what she meant. Wasn’t that the same thing?

“I know next to nothing about you, the real you, we’ve met less than a handful of times, and we did not do a lot of talking for it to be a viable connection. But I can’t help but wonder… if I'm wrong. And if I am- am I okay with never knowing that?”

He took a moment to mull over her words and deemed them fair enough. Logically, what she said was correct, but for him, it didn’t quite fit. He had never experienced what they shared before in his life; he had so many partners and some of the most intense sexual escapades one could have, but none left him reeling like that night with her. The kisses they shared in his office had felt like he was able to think again, as if everything noisy within him had gone quiet, stilled, and steady. Nothing in his life had ever been able to do that, no drink, no drug, no one. Except this woman who picked him up from a bar and then literally ran out of his life.

“How do you propose to answer this?” he asked, crossing his arms and fixing her with a discerning stare.

“We shall play a game.”

“... A…game?”

“Mhmm. You ask a question, and if I like the answer, you can step forward; if I don’t, you take a step back. I will do the same. Until we either finally meet or stay apart. Do you agree?”

“Does that count as the first question?”

“Illario.”

“Step forward.”

“What?”

“You called me by my name. I liked your answer. Please step forward.”

Lilya’s laughter bubbled out of her without her realising, covering her mouth to stifle herself, as she didn’t need one of his uppity neighbours calling the police on her for being unruly. Though thankfully, it was Antiva, the city never truly slept. “You tricky bastard. I get to ask two questions now.”

“What the hell- that’s not how you said we played the game.”

“I also didn’t say it wasn’t.”

“Are you sure you’re not a lawyer? That doesn’t seem like a therapist-y thing to say.”

“I am. That counts as another one of your questions, by the way, so now I guess I have three questions in a row to ask you,” she said, doing her best not to smile or gloat. Illario’s eyes squinted at her as a grin appeared on his face, chuckling into his hand when he knew he’d been played.

“Please step forward again. What can I say, I liked your answer, Doc. Almost makes me wish you worked for me, that’s some hard ball negotiating even I couldn’t argue against… but I guess if you did work for me, we wouldn’t be here in front of my building playing this weird game at midnight, so, I’ll just be happy you’re not on my payroll.”

“You couldn’t afford me on your payroll.”

“I am wealthy.”

“So am I… and if you tell me to step forward because of that answer, I will lose it.”

Illario raised his hands in surrender and mock innocence. “Wouldn’t dream of it. Besides, it wasn’t a question.”

Three questions. She had three questions to ask him when there were so many that raced around her mind. Go with your gut, it hasn’t led you astray yet. “Alright, what were you doing in the club tonight?”

“I was going to meet someone there for business, I hadn’t expected to find you there.” She nodded, and he took a step forward.

“If money weren’t an object, what would you be doing with your life?”

He paused and took the time to think out his answer. “The thing is, Doc… money isn’t an issue. I’ve never really thought about it because I didn’t think I could think about it. My life has been planned for me since the day I was born. This is who I am. I don’t think… the question should be if money weren’t an object. It should be, if I weren’t a Dellamorte, what would I be doing with my life?”

She had not expected him to be so candid, especially with the witty and flirty responses she had become accustomed to. Lilya nodded again, and he took a step. “Do you see yourself in a committed relationship in the future?”

“Yes.”

It was the way he said it, with his eyes pinned to hers and the barest hint of a smile at the corner of his lips, that made her swallow audibly. He said that with his whole chest. No hesitation. Eyes on the prize. That’s the second time she thought of herself as a prize, that was some egotistical shit right there. She felt herself nod, and he took a larger step toward her, but she said nothing against it, for he answered a big question.

“That’s three questions. My turn. Why did you call me?”

“I-” she stopped talking, about to give some stupid answer, but she owed it to herself to be honest. “... My friend in the car there… shared some keen insight with me that I truly hadn’t considered, and I needed to make sure before resigning myself to a course of action. What-ifs always kill me.”

“Take a step, Doc.”

Lilya took a step forward and realised she was already in front of the side mirror of the car, and Illario was already midway by the driver’s window. “Who was the one that got away?”

He leaned back and laughed, his eyes crinkling shut with such mirth that she was inspired to smile back at him.

“Doc… isn’t it obvious?”

“You can’t be serious!”

“Believe it or not, I am not accustomed to anyone running away from me, let alone getting away from me.”

“So is that it- you’re just intrigued because I’m the first one who didn’t fall over themselves to be with you straight away?”

“That may be a part of it. I don’t know,” he shrugged, still smiling like an idiot. “All I do know is that there is something about you, something in me can’t shake. I’ve tried. I’ve tried to forget about you, I’ve tried to meet other people, but whatever it is inside me doesn’t seem to want to work if it’s not you.”

“They have pills for that now, by the way. Small. Blue. Popular with the men, I hear.”

“Fuck me, Doc, you’re killing me here,” he groaned, shaking his head with a grin.

The sound of a window rolling down, and they were met with a very unimpressed Neve. She looked up at Lilya and tapped on her phone at the time. “Are we planning to stay here all night? Henry needs to get to sleep; he has an early start tomorrow.”

“Who the hell is Henry?” Lilya asked, utterly befuddled.

“Our driver! He’s been waiting here, watching you two play footpath footsie for the last ten minutes, and we’re his last ride. Either you wrap this up now, or we need to let him go.”

Illario strode forward and bowed down slightly in front of Neve’s door with his right hand over his heart in apology. “I am so sorry to you and your driver, please, let my driver take you wherever you need to be.”

“I’m not leaving, I’m invested now,” Neve replied nonplussed. “And I’m not leaving her without a ride, without a witness. I don’t care how pretty you are, there’s just no way. Not with what I’ve seen in this world,” she said, looping her arm around Lilya’s waist. The doctor looked upon the detective with grateful eyes and hugged her back, thankful to have such a friend.

“Alright, Dellamorte, speed round- if I told you we needed to wait two years because I need to adhere to what my licensing board expected of me after reporting this, what would you do? Would you move on, or would you wait with the possibility that whatever you’re feeling would dissipate before the time was even finished?”

“I’d wait.”

“You can’t answer that quickly!”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s not something that can be answered quickly, especially by someone who spent ages pondering what they’d like to do if they were able to!”

“Well, I’m not just anyone. I’m the CFO of our conglomerate. My job involves literally looking at something, running the numbers, casting projections, reviewing potential returns on investments, and analysing our cost-to-benefit ratio for all our acquisitions. I already know that if I invest two years of time in you, whatever I get would produce a return I can’t even quantify. There is only one risk I can see.”

“What’s that?”

“That you don’t see the same when you look at me.”

Lilya’s hand shot out and grabbed Neve by the arm, fingers wrapping around her wrist tightly, as if to ground her and convince herself she wasn’t dreaming. Her friend’s hand rested on top of hers and squeezed back.

“Shit, Lil. If you don’t kiss him, I just might.”

Illario smirked. He almost said “I’m game” in reflex when he realised that, surprisingly, he wasn’t. There was another beautiful woman in front of him paying a compliment he’d normally eat up, but he could only focus on the one who had been haunting him for months on end.

“Take… take many steps forward,” Lilya said against her better judgement.

Neve clucked her tongue and moved toward Illario’s car, talking over her shoulder in their general direction. “I will hop in with -“

“Marcel.”

“That’s right, thank you, Illario. I’ll hop in with Marcel and circle the block a few… dozen… times. You two talk. I’ll be back soon… ish. Lil, I’m a phone call away. He does anything- you call me, and you won’t even need an alibi if something happens to him.”

“Tough words from the cop who wouldn’t even get me an address.”

Neve turned on her heel and pressed her hand daintily to her chest as if she were offended. “There are some sacred lines you just don’t cross, Lil. I’ll be back. Make good choices. Remember, public indecency isn’t cool. So don’t get caught.”

“Just go, Neve!”

Lilya exhaled and closed her eyes, exasperated at her bestie’s antics. She heard the click of his shoes against the pavement and knew he took liberty with how many steps were classified as “many,” stopping short, just in front of her. It was her fault. She had not been specific.

“What is truly holding you back?” he asked, hands twitching at his sides with his need to touch her again. Up close, he could see it, the flicker of emotions, the rapid fire of thoughts as they moved across her face. She was choosing her words carefully, weighing them not just for him, but for herself as well.

“The professional aspects are a real concern. It is. I worked too long, too hard and care about my patients too much to lose everything- because my licence can be taken away from me, because of this,” Lilya said as she wildly gestured between them. She took a breath and hugged herself, knowing there was no point in indulging her self-denial any longer. “And yeah, that’s not just it- there’s more luggage than that to unpack. I know there is, and none of it is your fault. I don’t know quite how to fix it because there was no one worth fixing it for before”

He gave in to his desire, reaching for her waist and pulling her gently toward him, closing the last sliver of distance- bringing them back to where they’d been earlier that evening, earlier that day. Just a breath apart. Lilya’s hands moved without thought, settling against his chest. The fine silk of his shirt was warm beneath her fingers, smooth and soft, just like the skin she remembered, the skin she shouldn’t still be thinking about. But she was.

“Final question… You seem willing to go through with this. The waiting. My ethical responsibilities. The crazy friends I keep in the wings to torment you… all of it…”

“That’s a statement, not a question. It’s a true statement surely, but not a question, Doc.”

Lilya’s nails lightly grazed along his chest as she curled her hands into fists, a frown playing at her lips. “The question is… would you go through with all of it, even if it meant hurting your cousin? Because it might. It could really hurt him if we were to continue. Are you willing to do that?”

Illario froze. Could it? Could he?

Lilya smiled sadly at his hesitation- read him like a headline. She took a step back, both of them instantly colder for it.

“And that… that right there. That is why we can’t do this.”

He reached for her, his instincts overriding everything, but she stepped further out of his reach. Illario could feel his heart pounding in his chest as she took another. They were so close, right there, and he felt the chance slip through his fingers. How did the closing of this door feel worse than any of his actual relationships? Were they all so shallow that this flicker of real, actual connection with someone meant more to him than anything he had before? Was that a thing?

“… Yeah, Neve. Come back. It’s okay- I’m fine, I’m fine, we’ve just finished talking. Mhmm. Yup. We’ll get another ride. See you soon.”

Clearing his throat, Illario blinked a few times to come back to himself. “You can take my car. I said he’ll take you anywhere you want.”

“ I couldn’t-“

“You can. You should. Please, I insist.”

“I… thank you.”

They stood in silence as they waited for Neve to return. Lilya shivered and suddenly realised she was still wearing his jacket.

“I should- your jacket”

“It’s fine. Keep it until you get home.”

“Yeah. Okay, thanks.”

An eternity passed as they stood side by side, the awkward tension growing by the second. She wanted to tell him to go inside, but she knew he’d tell her he wasn’t going to leave her alone, and then it would be even more awkward because it would make her heart flutter. Even more than the mere thought of it already did.

“Just tell me this. What was the point then, of coming here? Of this entire exercise?”

“If it were just about sex, then I might be able to sublimate that I’m human and I can make one more mistake. Get you out of my system. But I think... that it’s more than chemistry. And to go into anything with that knowledge, I can’t even pretend to know how to face doing that every day. To choose to make a mistake that hurts the people I promised to help, every day. That’s not who I am.”

“So if it was just sex that’d be fine, but because I actually like you, that’s what makes it worse?!”

“Yes.”

“You shrinks are messed up, you know that?”

“Yes.”

“So what… this is it. For real. No chance of anything, now or in two years?”

“… Yes.”

He swallowed as an acrid taste, like something burnt, bloomed at the back of his throat. “Fine. Then, please, as a man who makes mistakes, may I just have one more? For our old fuck-ups’ sake?”

She looked at him for a moment, something fragile and knowing in her eyes, and then she nodded- slowly, solemnly- with no illusions or promises. Just the quiet agreement of two people who had already said goodbye in everything but gesture.

He stepped down off the curb. She stood slightly above him on the footpath, and he couldn’t help but notice, with a flicker of fond amusement he knew he shouldn’t have, that even now, he was still taller. Illario reached up, brushing a few stray hairs from her face, fingers longing to linger upon her skin. She was still utterly, impossibly enchanting, more so in this moment, wrapped in silence and streetlight and the ache of what they wouldn’t become. And maybe that’s why it hurt. Because she was standing right there, close enough to touch, but still not his.

He leaned in and pressed a kiss to her cheek. Then her temple. And finally, a last, gentle kiss to her lips. Chaste, reverent, a farewell shaped from the affection he bore her from the fleeting moments they had shared. She didn’t pull away. She didn’t have to. They both knew this was the end of it.

When he stepped back, the space between them felt even heavier than before. He had wanted to say something cool or suave or, at the very least, memorable, but his car turned the corner and he missed his chance. Again.

A cold wind tugged at her as if it was urging her to stay back, but her feet remained rooted to the spot. The tension between them, once warm with possibility, cooled fast, like a breath on glass- already fading. She reached for the right words, but found none that would give him the solace he deserved after what she put them through, to sate her own damn curiosity.

“For whatever it’s worth,” she began, meeting his eyes one last time, “I’m thankful to know it was more than sex between us. I’ll mourn it… and be grateful. For what could have been. And I’ll rest easier knowing it wasn’t just chemistry- it was real.” She inhaled sharply, bracing herself. “It just… couldn’t be.”

The silence stretched on between them, tremulous, terrible and tender.

The car pulled up behind him, its headlights slicing through the darkness like a spotlight on a stage, the last act of their messy play. He stepped back, his face unreadable, jaw clenched in silent compliance. He opened the door for her without a word, but his eyes followed her like she was about to step behind a closing curtain he wasn’t ready to let fall.

“Goodbye, Mr. Dellamorte.”

A nod.

“See you around, Dr de Riva.”

Their formality a shield, an effort at dignity between them as they both unravelled.

She slid into the car and he did not look away, even as the shadows stole her from him.

She collapsed into Neve’s waiting arms, embracing her without hesitation, like she’d been bracing for the impact all along. Neve had always known when Lilya was coming apart; she’d learned to listen for her unspoken words long before they were ever said. Lilya tucked her head beneath Neve’s chin, her voice muffled but unmistakably raw. “I don’t want… I can’t be alone tonight. Can I stay with you?”

Neve rested her cheek on the top of her head, her hands rubbing at her arms in quiet reassurance. “Yeah, of course. I’ll have to tidy a little… okay, a lot… but yeah. Of course.”

Lilya closed her eyes. Guilt coiled low in her stomach. She wasn’t sure if she’d made the right choice for her, for them- only that she had made a choice. And for tonight, that would have to be enough.

---

Outside, the car pulled away, its taillights fading into the dark. He stood there, unmoving, like a damned statue carved from an artist’s confusion and regret, watching until even the red smear of light had vanished into the night. He didn’t follow. He couldn’t. Not now. Not after that.

He laughed again, at himself, for he'd fancied himself a hunter. Told himself he would chase her, sweep her off her feet. She really never failed to surprise him. He hadn’t expected her to look at him with those big, bright eyes that told him yesand no within the same breath. She’d given him a taste of maybe, just long enough for him to believe, before snatching it away from them both like a cruel trick, some malicious sleight of hand.

She wanted him. Maker, he knew that much. She did too. It was heard in her trembling voice, felt in the way her hands had touched him, seen from the shine in her eyes she blinked back too quickly to be ever called tears- but it was there, she was there. But wanting wasn't enough. Not for her. Not when it meant hurting Lucanis. So she left- noble, broken and beautiful in retreat.

And he stood there, thoughts soaked in bitterness, drowning in the quiet. A would-be hunter, shot down before the hunt even began. Wounded not by her rejection, but by the brief flare of promise. He was just a man who wandered too close to the flame and never learnt, no matter how many times he was burnt. All he could do was bleed out silently in the dark, as she slipped away and the night closed in behind her.

——— 

Pizza for dinner? No, maybe some pasta. Or both. And some gelato, of course. 

Months had passed since she last saw Illario Dellamorte. 

True to his word, he did not call her office, did not contact her at all. She had tried to delete his number from her phone, but she couldn’t. Told herself to keep it just in case. The weeks that had passed saw her fall into a mindless routine of working, eating, and watching unenjoyable shows, where she yelled at the TV and browsed the dog shelters for a companion that she could call her own. She was the same person her patients knew, but Bellara still watched her with quiet concern, never lingering too long before glancing away, though not before Lilya caught her. She was grateful for her assistant’s sensitivity. Bellara could talk the ear off a statue and often overstepped in the most endearing and well-meaning ways, but when it came to pain- real, enduring pain- she was wise beyond her years. She recognised it even when concealed behind a smile, and knew better than to speak before Lilya was ready.

She hadn’t caught up with Neve since she spent the weekend rotting in her bed with her, her friend trying to force raw cookie dough into her mouth with whiskey in an effort to heal her. Teia had tried to call and ask her to go out for drinks or coffee, or even just to prove she was alive and not just some AI answering machine, but she kept saying she was busy or not feeling well, or that it would be some other time. 

“But you’ll come to the party, right? You said you would!”

“Yeah, Tay, of course.”

...Yeah. She lied. 

She didn’t want to be a downer at the party. The last thing Teia needed was to be watching her from the corner of her eye and babysitting her when it was her night to shine. Lilya would take her out for drinks on the weekend to celebrate and buy her something ridiculously fabulous to make up for it. She had every intention of staying in her pyjamas for an ungodly amount of time again. She scratched at her head, irritated with herself- she hadn’t even broken up with him! He wasn’t her boyfriend. But she’d be lying to herself if she said she didn’t miss his presence in the periphery of her life; that she wasn’t constantly thinking of him, if he was okay and had already moved on. That she wasn’t obsessively scanning the society columns to see if he’d been spotted out and about like some creepy idiot who couldn’t let go of someone who was never hers to begin with.  

She heard her front door open, and she sat up, alarmed, until she heard her brother’s voice call out to her. “Lilya? Are you home?” 

“...No?” 

“Wonderful. I’ll just wait until you’re back then, shall I?” 

“Tremendous.” 

“Lilya de Riva.” 

“Viago de Riva.” 

“Are you alone in there?” “If I were home, then yes, I’d consider myself very much alone.” 

“Are you clothed or naked?” 

“Technically, you’ll find we’re all naked under our clothes.” 

“I’m coming in.” 

“I’m not home, remember- hey! Hey! Stop tha- Viago! Stop!” she shrieked as he climbed onto her bed and locked his arms around her middle like he used to do when she was a child, half expecting him to slam her into the bed after they’d watched one too many wrestling matches. He lifted her up with such relative ease she was half tempted to ask if he had been testing a new steroid on himself- mad chemist that he was. 

He propped her up, looking over his dishevelled sibling, hair a mess, wearing what he could only assume was her very worn university sweatshirt and the biggest, baggiest pair of pyjama bottoms he had ever seen. It was unbecoming of a de Riva, and his flat, disappointed stare said as much. She scoffed at him and made to burrow back into her nest of pillows and blankets, but he caught her around the middle and threatened to throw her over his shoulder if she continued being an annoying brat. 

“Why are you here, Vi?” she said, looking like a sad wet dog. “I just want to be left alone, is that too much to ask?” 

Viago shook his head and crossed his arms, glowering at her so intensely that it would have levelled anyone else who hadn’t grown up with him. “We have. We have left you alone, and you have done nothing but fester here. What would you be saying to your patients in this situation, Lilya?” 

She gave him a sour look. How dare he use logic on her? Even worse, her logic. Asshole. 

“I just don’t feel up to going to this event and dressing up and pretending to care about celebrities and other trust fund babies, with their ridiculous blue blood issues, like not having enough of their favourite champagne available, their maids are more loved by their children than they are, or their country club’s greens aren’t green enough. I don’t have it in me, Viago.” 

He gave her a long, discerning stare, which warmed the longer he observed her. He placed a gloved hand on her shoulder and squeezed, in what he hoped was a comforting act. 

“Lilya… I don’t give a shit.” 

“...What?”

“I do not give a shit,” he repeated sincerely, squeezing her shoulder again, this time his comfort was less keenly felt. “I don’t care if you don’t want to see me or return my calls, only sending me one-worded answers to show me proof of life every other week. I don’t care if you want to look like… this… or if you appear to be subsisting on grilled cheese sandwiches and take-out alone. What I care about is my own peace of mind.” 

“You just said you were happy with my text messages,” she whined, pushing his hand off of her. “Why are you making my life hell?” 

“Yes, I am happy with them. But Teia is not,” he differentiated with a pointed stare. “And if she is not happy, I am not happy. Because she continues to drive me mad talking about you. So if my life is hell, your life is hell. It is like what your mother used to tell me, sharing is caring.” 

Lilya did well not to snort in front of her already unimpressed brother. 

“So you will come with me, you will get ready, you will attend your friend’s party, and you will pretend to have a good time. You will talk, drink, and relate to those blue-blooded bastards, and you will be a damn good friend to Teia, do you understand? Because lately, you haven’t been.” 

She really hated it when he made sense. It was so typically Viago, making good points with his haughty little face, it made her both want to hug and punch him. But she figured that was how most siblings felt about each other. 

“Fine… but I am wearing UGG boots out of this house.” 

“Lilya-” 

“Teia wouldn’t have cared if I showed up to the party like this.” 

“Teia is a far better person than I am, which is why I was sent. We’re going back to the House, Teia has her team waiting to get you ready. So march down and get into the town car, young lady-”

“-Young lady?”

“I swear to the Maker, Little Bird-”

“Alright, I’m going, I’m going.” 

---

Lilya sat in the chair, mentally calculating the most efficient way to strangle her best friend, just enough to leave her conscious for her own celebration, of course. She’d seen the invitation tucked into Viago’s attaché case, the same one she had deliberately left unopened at her office... because well... she really had no plans to go. She hadn’t even taken it out of the envelope, just confirming she received it when Teia had asked. 

“Teia... why didn’t you tell me you were merging with Dellamorte Holdings?” 

“Why did I have to? It’s right there on the invite. Why do you ask?”

“Are you kidding me? How come it hadn’t come up before all this?! You know who I had that one-night stand with that night you got back together with Viago!” 

“Lilya, I literally have no idea who you’re talking about.” 

“What? I sent you a selfie before I left the bar that night!” 

“Which I never got, sweetie, don’t know what to tell you. The wonders of modern technology. So wait... who did you sleep with? Was it Lucanis or Illario?”

“Teia.” 

“Fuck me. It was both of them. Well Done.” 

“T E I A”

“... Oh shit. It wasn’t Caterina, was it?”

“I really need new friends.” 

“You can try, darling, but none will be as fantastic as I am. Now... was that a yes or no to the cousin threesome? If you don’t respond, I’m just going to start making up nasty assumptions that line up with my expectations of you. I’m thinking you all wanted to use a hot tub, but it was too small, and you had to sit on one of their laps? Or their face? Tell me everything and prove me wrong.”

Upon arriving and fixing her friend with a glare sharp enough to make Teia laugh, she immediately slipped into the background, doing her best to remain unnoticed. She lingered at the fringes of the party, making polite conversation in small groups, her eyes scanning the room, careful to avoid seeing or being seen by... someone.

Still, she breathed a little easier. Even in a room full of acclaimed producers, directors, and entertainers, Teia shone. Resplendent as ever, she drew every gaze. As CEO of the country’s largest entertainment group, she had always been impossible to ignore. Viago stood beside her as if he’d been photoshopped there, polished, rigid, and pristine. But that was nothing new to any of their peers. He had long been known as a bit of a snob: reserved and wholly uninterested in mingling with... people. They weren’t there for him anyway. They were there for the glamorous woman on his arm, dressed in a deep red gown with a back so low it revealed the tattoo she’d gotten on their girls’ trip to Rivain, the one they took to celebrate Lilya’s high school graduation. Teia wore it without apology, clearly unfazed by who might see it.

She had worked hard to secure this deal, and tonight she deserved her moment. But that didn’t stop her from glancing over her shoulder, checking that Lilya was alright.

Pushy or not, there was no better friend in the world than Teia Cantori.

“Lilya?” 

She paused, panic spreading through her in an instant. 

“Lilya de Riva? My dear, it has been too long!” 

She relaxed. She knew that voice, and it was not his.  

Spinning on her heel, she turned to see the gentle face of her old professor, Emmrich Volkarin, dressed to the nines as always, holding a flute of champagne and a tiny plate of hors d'oeuvres. Lilya smiled for the first time in what felt like days and reached out for her old friend, kissing him warmly on the cheek. 

“Professor Volkarin! Hello! Pardon my surprise, I wasn’t expecting you here!” 

“Please, Lilya, Emmrich. I’ve not been your teacher for many years now,” he gushed, carefully propping his food and drink at a nearby table. With his hands free, he greeted his favourite ex-student with a firm hug, the professor not releasing her until she let go first. Perhaps she should have let go sooner, for when she peered back up at the vertically gifted man, he was staring at her with concern. Always far too perceptive for his own good. “My dear…” 

Lilya shook her head and picked up a glass of champagne from one of the roving servers and sipped at it nervously. “Please don’t, Professor.” 

“What is troubling you?” 

“Nothing at all. Tell me, how is teaching these days? And your practice? Is Strife here too?” she asked hurriedly, clearly changing the topic. He sighed heavily and frowned; the lines around his mouth deepened, but did nothing to diminish his handsome looks. 

“Alas, he is off to a dig site somewhere deep in Arlathan again; otherwise, I would have wrangled that man into a tuxedo. You will be glad to know that my teaching still proves to be an exciting endeavour! Finding like-minded souls, like yourself, and helping them find their paths to help others is always fulfilling. And whilst I’ve pared back my private practice hours, it is still good to be out there assisting people,” he said pointedly, picking up his glass and saluting her before taking a drink. 

Lilya groaned quietly but could feel herself smile nonetheless. Emmrich Volkarin was the best in their field for a reason. She wiped at the lip gloss that had stained the rim of her glass to shift focus from her friend’s intense gaze, not wanting to divulge everything to him in such a public area. As if reading her mind, he offered his arm and led them to a seating area outside the function room, where only a few people were about. He sat them down and took both of her hands into his, patting them lightly as he had when she had broken down in her honours year, after her laptop was stolen and along with it her half-written thesis. 

“Lilya… we’ve known each other for years, and I consider you a dear friend and colleague,” he said gently. “Please, let me help.”

“Viago called you, didn’t he?” she asked, glancing up to find her brother watching them from the hall. Nosy bastard. 

Emmrich chuckled awkwardly and gave a slight nod. “He did. Invited me to have a chat with you as he believed you would not be so open to meet with me otherwise. He’s still fiercely protective of you, even after all this time.”

“That’s one word for it,” she muttered, but she managed a tight smile in Viago’s direction before turning back to the professor. “I… You’re going to be so disappointed in me,” she whispered, her voice catching. Shame, sadness, and guilt welled up all at once, turning her bright eyes glassy. 

“Disappointed? Goodness, no. Concerned... well, perhaps. But never disappointed. You’ve always been one to hold yourself to such impossible standards.” Emmrich’s expression softened, but he remained measured as he always did.

Lilya smiled weakly and gathered her courage, edging closer to him on the couch, not wanting anyone to hear her admit to what had happened between her, Illario, and the consequences for Lucanis’ treatment. Everything that had passed in the last six months, the almost-something that happened between them and the fact that she embarrassingly, still could not get over it so long afterwards. 

“How foolish of me, right?” 

Emmrich exhaled gently. “Matters of the heart make fools of all of us,” he said, voice warm but cautious. “But you’re right, this is indeed a complicated situation you’ve found yourself in. And unfortunately, it’s not one I can advise you on directly, not while I’m still working with Lucanis.”

Lilya blinked. “Of course. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to put you in a difficult position-”

He shook his head kindly to comfort her. “You’re not. But this is something where your own judgement, and your ability to navigate ethically, matter more than anything I could tell you. The fact that you're thinking about Lucanis’ well-being, even now, says a great deal about you.”

She nodded slowly, though her throat tightened as she prodded further into the matter. “But let’s say, hypothetically, that the feelings weren’t one-sided. That there’s still something unresolved. Wouldn’t proceeding with it still risk damaging Lucanis? Another betrayal from the people he trusted?”

Emmrich took a moment, then offered a steady, thoughtful smile. “You may be right. Or not at all. The only way to know is to talk to him, when the time is right. If you truly care about both of them, clarity and honesty are the best path forward.”

Lilya gave a strained laugh and smoothed the skirt of her dress, fingertips dancing over the fabric. “Truly, there’s hardly any point. Just because I’m still holding onto something doesn’t mean Illario is. Once I told him this could hurt Lucanis, he hesitated, and that’s where we parted ways. Men like him don’t pine for women like me, Professor.”

He leaned back, crossing one leg over the other with the familiar expression he wore in class when she thought she’d nailed the right answer, only to realise she had failed to take in all the variables of the situation.

“Ah, Lilya,” he said, smiling fondly. “Perhaps I still have a few things left to teach you.”

---

Another glass of Negroni was thrust into his hand, and he grunted his thanks, ignoring the dry laugh that followed shortly. 

“Why thank you for that Lucanis, how kind of you to refill my drink Lucanis, why am I being such a pain in your ass, Lucanis? Oh, I don’t know Illario. Perhaps it’s because you’re a pain in my ass on days that end with a Y,” he teased, taking a sip of his gin and tonic. “Seriously, you should be happy. The merger has passed, and you’re the talk of the finance world once again, cousin. The Cantori acquisition was a good choice, Caterina is happy.” 

“...Happy?” Illario asked, choking on his drink. 

Lucanis cringed and grinned sheepishly, offering a lame half shrug. “Well, as happy as that woman can seem.” 

“If that woman ever cracked a smile, it would be a Satinalia miracle.” 

“Just because you’re in a shitty mood doesn’t mean you need to wish for the world to witness that particular eldritch horror rise,” Lucanis snorted, turning around to lean against the bar like his cousin. “But back to my original point-”

“You had one?” 

“Surprisingly, yes. You are standing here like you don’t want to be here-”

“I don’t want to be here.” 

“And yet here we are- because it’s our duty, our business. This is your triumph, Illario. You convinced us this venture was worth it, and yet these past few months, you’ve done nothing but sulk.” He paused, studying the man beside him. “Is it me? Did you prefer it when I was angry with you?”

Lucanis had long forgiven him, but his anger had taken time to fade, lingering much longer than he wanted. Yet upon hearing that Zara had managed to get to his cousin and assault him, he was pulled straight out of his fog of resentment- he was not going to let that witch near his family again. Illario had seemed glad enough to have him back at first. But the longer they spent together, the more he noticed the changes: the far-off stares when he thought no one was looking, the sudden fascination with the colour green. He wore it more often now, and he’d vetoed the original navy palette for the celebration, insisting it should be green instead- to represent new beginnings, growth, and expansion, he’d said.

He’d even met with the event coordinators personally, selecting every piece of foliage that now adorned the space. The walls were cloaked in lush shrubbery, and hanging ruscus vines cascaded like curtains, framing the room in a quiet, elegant beauty. Pops of white and green ranunculus and hydrangeas subtly drew one’s eye deliberately around the room. If Illario ever tired of being their CFO, he could’ve easily slipped into a career in event design. His flair for the dramatic had finally found a worthy outlet, rather than just his closet or his choice in romantic pursuits.  

Lucanis had tried to engage him, to see if his ex, rearing her cursed head, was the cause of the sudden change in his mood, or if something else was to blame. The team had told him that there was another woman that day in the office who had been roped into helping Illario, and it looked like there could have been a spark between them, but that was the last they’d seen of her. Typical Illario, he was not one to stay with one partner for too long- Zara was the anomaly and a dangerous one at that. Illario was probably tired or stressed after holding both jobs for so long, due to his unintended sabbatical.

“Say, Illario, how about after this event wraps up, you take the next couple of weeks off? A month, two even- however long you need to recharge.” Illario narrowed his eyes at him as he chewed on an olive. “I know you did a lot behind the scenes when I was gone, let me return the favour. Take some time off, Maker knows you have too much leave accumulated- our HR team has been hounding me to force you to take leave for a few months now.” 

“Like you can talk, HR said you needed to take even more time off.” 

“Yes, it is obvious we need hobbies outside of work. But please, think about it. Maybe some time away from here will do you some good,” Lucanis said earnestly, causing Illario to pause mid-drink before agreeing to think about it. He clapped Illario on the back and was about to suggest they head off to re-join Teia and her date when he noticed two familiar guests enter through the main entrance. “Is that.. Why is my past therapist and current therapist here tonight? Did you invite them?” 

“What?!” Illario’s reaction was instantaneous; he snapped to attention, eyes locked across the room, and Lucanis followed his gaze.

Lilya.

Lucanis raised an eyebrow. Of all the women in the room, of course it would be her.

Illario didn’t speak, didn’t move. But Lucanis didn’t need him to. The way his cousin watched her, like someone staring at a memory that should’ve faded by now, but hadn’t. Like he’d tried to forget her, tried to let it go, but couldn’t. She should have been a ghost by now, something half-remembered and harmless. But there she was. Real. Beautiful. And still not his.

That look told Lucanis everything.

---

Illario straightened to his full height to see across the room, his eyes locked onto the two arm-in-arm and obviously attending the soiree together. He saw her first, of course, found her easily. He always did.

Even in a crowded room in a sea of black, she drew his gaze like a secret he wasn’t supposed to want to remember. She hadn’t meant to stand out; he knew her well enough to see that. The strapless black gown she wore was simple and sophisticated. It clung to her like water, dark as ink, flowing over her form. Even from across the room, the way the fabric drank in the light, soft and heavy, he knew it had to be velvet. Something so wonderfully tactile, encouraging your partner to touch you, to run their palms over you again and again - it seemed like the perfect choice for her. Lilya had leaned in to something that Teia had whispered, and she smacked her playfully; the satin trim at her chest catching the light when she moved, tempting him to follow every movement. How could something so little, so innocuous, affect him still?

He told himself to look away. He even managed it… for all of three seconds. But when his eyes slid back across the room, there she was, laughing politely at something the man beside her said. His hand was too familiar on her back, his smile too warm, too satisfied with himself. He had to remind himself it would not be a good look to beat up a guest at an event he was hosting. It might send the wrong message about how he conducted business. 

Though, thinking about hurting the man wasn’t technically against any rules. He shouldn’t have been there anyway, not with her. Not if the reasons she'd given him months ago still meant anything. Too soon. Too complicated. Too inappropriate- she’d said. For Lucanis- she’d said. She was the one who had drawn the line, snatched back any possibility with a trembling smile, and told him it was for the best. And yet here she was, arm-in-arm with someone whose conflicts ran deeper than his did. The man was in charge of Lucanis’ treatment, right? So it didn’t make sense. Or was her refusal simply a matter of politeness? That night, as she stood in his embrace, did she realise that he wasn’t worth the trouble, but found the old man was? 

He couldn’t let his bitterness show. Not tonight, not in front of Lucanis. He stood with his drink and a mask of practised indifference, but his chest felt heavy. Because no matter how much he wanted to pretend otherwise, he couldn’t tear his eyes away from her. Even in something so deceptively simple, she was the picture of devastating beauty. While the others merely sparkled loudly, she smouldered quietly, commanding the room’s attention without having to say a word. And he, oh, he was still aflame.

He turned to the bar and requested a shot of grappa, causing Lucanis to watch him from the corner of his eye. He ignored him and swallowed it in one go, the burn of it reminding him that he didn’t care. She made her position very clear that night in front of his building, and he was not, could not, would not be interested in someone who did not want him. 

He needed another drink. 

---

Lucanis glanced between his cousin, now ordering another shot, and his therapists, past and present, who had moved with Teia further into the centre of the room, chatting cheerfully and utterly oblivious to the strain mounting between him and Illario. He exhaled through his mouth, straightened his tuxedo, and resigned himself to the inevitable.

There was nothing for it. He would have to do something before the tension drowned them all. In grappa or guilt, whatever got to them first. 

“Mierda.”

[battery-enthusiast]

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[birdmenmanga]

I don’t have the bones to switch accounts so anon but—

I think Karasuma would carry a bit of Takayama in his heart but I think he understands there’s a bit of a divide between em, but Karasuma for all he “separated” from humanity is super in tune with his Birdmen fam. He’s got Sagisawa, Kamochan, Umino. He’s got responsibilities. I don’t think he’d “get over it” but he’d continue with the rest of his life

Takayama I think holds on to death so much. Like, definitely tied to his parents deaths, but I’m thinking of Arthur and the shared consciousness. I’m thinking of the Original Seven, and I’m thinking of the way it seems like Karasuma is his connection to the world

hi mallll (probably?)

(post which prompted the ask)

(song which you should listen to while reading my answer, which I listened to on loop while writing my answer)

You nailed what was happening inside my head pretty well. I think outwardly, for someone who doesn't know either of them very well, Karasuma would appear to spend a longer time grieving Takayama than the other way around. As you say, he does still have the rest of his families and his responsibilities and I think that WOULD be able to carry him towards relative normalcy. Give it a few years, maybe 6 or 7 if it's REALLY rough. But he will be able to look back at his memories of Takayama with deeper affection than pain and he will be able to smile about it in time.

Takayama though. Dude. I don't think he ever really gets over it. Death DOES profoundly affect his psyche in the sense that it hangs over him and haunts him and compels him to save people. But at the same time I think he would be in such deep denial about Karasuma dying... like, he saved him, he chose him as the first of his seven so he could give him the power to shape the world, just for him to die? After all of that? Even with the wisdom of his infinite timelines to guide him?

I think, and this is me being self-indulgent, Takayama wouldn't bring Karasuma up particularly often, but when he does he speaks like Karasuma's keys are still on the counter and his clothes are still in the laundry hamper. Like he's still here, like he never left. Like he'll be home in just a few hours.

The people close to him probably tried to sit down seriously with him and tell him gently that Karasuma's gone, he's not coming back, it's not good to pretend that he is. And Takayama just says that he knows, and he DOES know, but he doesn't stop doing this. So they stop telling him to stop. Just for this one subject, they treat him a bit like a dementia patient-- yes, go on, tell us about Karasuma. The beautiful days. Go on. And he does.

In death they ascend to godhood in each other's eyes. Karasuma's struggle with his feelings towards Takayama are due, in part, to the fact that he can see the human in him much more clearly than anyone else. I think with time that part of him in Karasuma's memories will fade, leaving merely the divine behind, like how it is in everyone else's mind. Time heals all wounds, but also wears the complex and faceted surface of a stone smooth. The finer details of what had once made Takayama so compelling to Karasuma will be quietly eroded away in favor of the saint everyone reveres. This is not a tragedy; Karasuma, who once wondered if he was really special to Takayama in face of the other members of the Seven, will feel relieved that he wasn't SO special to him after all. (Not true.) Because yes, yes, if I wasn't that special, if I'm the same as the rest of you, all of you understand my pain to some level, and I'll no longer feel isolated. I have to forget you. It always had to end this way, because I'm me, and you're you.

As for Takayama, I don't think he's ever seriously considered the idea that he could lose Karasuma. It came as a complete shock to him that Karasuma would refuse to go with him to the new world; I think up until the moment Karasuma actually dies Takayama won't actually realize it's even a possibility. In this sense I don't think Takayama ever properly treasured any of the time he spent with Karasuma. There's always another chance; tomorrow is another day. So when Karasuma does die, he has to look back on the memories he does have, disjointed bits and scraps, and hold them close. Sometimes glimpses of other-timeline Karasuma get mixed in. He wears his memories of him like a thick overcoat, keeps it close, and it in turn keeps him warm. But holes are wearing out at the seams. He mends it together, but it isn't like how it was before. The shape and fit of the overcoat changes. He still can't let go. I think when the day comes, and it's Takayama's turn to die, he'll be buried in it. Memories of a person who wasn't quite Karasuma, his own personal saint, less disagreeable and more beloved than the real one ever was. And it would be the closest thing to contentment he'd have.

Anyways all this to say that it would SUCK to be the next guy who gets a weird obsession with Takayama. You're already dealing with the bullshit Karasuma had to deal with (reaching some kind of even footing with a god, bad communication skills, etc.) and now there's an EXTRA guy thrown into this situation who's already dead that he talks of like he's still alive and was perfect in every way like brotherrrr how do you measure up to that. I'd kill myself

[luvvyouforever]

Hello!! I saw that your requests were open. Could you possibly do another Modern AU! Rhysand x College Student! reader fic? I loved the first one you posted and definitely gave me some comfort with how stressful college is 😭

I always liked imagining the ACOTAR universe in a modern au. Especially Velaris in a modern setting.

Hope you are doing well and taking care of yourself💜💜

hi! absolutely dear <3 i tried to include more velaris in this!

comfort on the bridge - modern au!rhysand x college student!reader

↳ a night out in velaris ought to clear your worries about upcoming exams. does it actually, though?

↳ modern portrayal of velaris, mentions of self doubt and stress, reader is studying to be a teacher but it could be replaced with any major/focus. this isn't my best work, i'll admit, and it did take me like two weeks to completely finish but here you go!

↳ divider art from @firefly-graphics

usually, there was nothing better than a night out on the town in velaris, surrounded by the inner circle and your loving partner, rhysand. very little made you more excited than getting dressed up with mor, pregaming with cassian, and flooding the dance floor of rita's. tonight, however, it was the last thing you wanted to do.

rhysand could sense your hesitance about going out, feeling the bond between you two grow shaky and antsy but there was no way you could bring yourself to say no to them. you were just more stressed out than you imagined possible and so much more was in your mind than getting drunk and dancing to fae pop music.

mortal college was more than you had anticipated. it was always your goal, far before your ears grew pointy and you became a part of the night court's defenders, to go to college and make something of yourself. rhysand encouraged you wholeheartedly, telling you over and over that it was a good idea, that velaris needed more teachers, that you could accomplish it.

and now, your college career was coming to a close which only meant certifications, exams, and papers that all required more of you than you could give. you could only remind yourself of the shining new generation of fae being born in velaris that needed teaching so many times.

all of those worries and deadlines could not be suppressed by the strong liquor going down your throat, leaving a harsh burn in its wake. nevertheless, you took every shot cassian offered and with everyone one of them, rhysand grew more worried.

"you're putting 'em down tonight, y/n!" cassian cheered as the clink of the shot glass hitting the bar rang through the room. "you want another one?"

"yeah, i'd lo-"

"darling, i really don't think you should have another drink. you'll feel terrible later," rhysand's deep voice sent shivers down your spine as his large chest came up behind you. instinctively, you leaned back into his warmth.

"no! we gotta have fun tonight! i can't let anyone down!" you rebutted. your hand reached for the drink on the bar but your hand was trapped by rhysand's before you could. "hey!"

without a response or argument, rhysand began to tug and you didn't put up much of a fight (you were positive that one wrong move and your lack of coordination would land you on your butt on the floor). cassian looked at the two of you, making brief eye contact with rhysand and he nodded in understanding. something was wrong.

"where are we going?" you asked your partner after you stepped into the fresh air of velaris. despite it being so late, the city was quite alive with people, bikes, lights, music, and sounds. it was a beautiful sight, one that usually caught your breath, but there were more pressing matters. like why did rhysand take you away from your fun? the worries were just now being forgotten!

rhysand didn't answer your pestering but instead led you down some streets, up one incline, and landed at an old steel bridge that was at a high enough point to overlook the streets below. it was a spot you frequented when stressed but you didn't know that anyone knew. of course rhysand knew.

without having to say anything, you both perched on the edge of the bridge, wrapping your legs around the posts. your arms brushed against each other and with a few deep breaths, you felt the alcohol begin to leave your system as quickly as it came in.

"what's going on? you're drinking a lot, you seem stressed. i feel it. i don't even have to look in your mind to tell," rhysand said softly. his violet eyes shined in the night and though his gaze was strong, you couldn't help but fall into it.

you sighed and leaned your forehead against the cool metal of the bridge. the sounds of your city flooded your ears and it washed you with some calm that you were searching for. "i'm just stressed. there's so much on my plate, so much coming up, and i don't feel smart enough or good enough for any of it." just speaking the words out loud felt like a weight being taken off of your body. surgically removed and thrown hundreds of miles away.

"tell me about it," your partner said. he wouldn't get it, necessarily, but sharing the weight would help.

"there's three certification tests i have to take, all of which are unnecessarily hard. and that's just so i can get my license to teach. i still have four exams, all worth well over a hundred points, and i feel grossly underprepared for each and everyone one of them. then there's this theory class that's all about best practices in education and research and i feel like i'm picking up none of it," you expressed. "i don't feel like i am going to be the best i can be for velaris. i want to teach them but i'm struggling to pass my class. how am i supposed to impart all of this amazing knowledge on them when i don't even know it?"

your head fell forward onto the bar again and you relished in the soothing feeling of it. down below, music and laughter erupted from a rooftop bar. you wished you could know what rhysand was thinking.

"you know...i think you're the most intelligent person i ever met-"

"that's not-"

"ah! ah! no arguing," rhysand cut you off. "as i was saying...you are the most intelligent person i ever met. the capabilities you have far exceed anyone in the spring court and hewn city combined. the passion you have for our city and its education is so admirable, y/n. everyone will be so lucky to have you as their teacher. the fact that you committed to going to mortal college just to provide the small number of velaris children with a proper education proves to me that the cauldron picked the most perfect person to be my mate."

looking at onto your city, rhysand's words sunk in. somewhere in a back yard, high fae children laughed cheerfully, clearly excited to be up later than what would usually be allowed. it was hard work but work that you were more than excited to be doing.

with a sigh, you leaned into rhysand's side, grateful for him being your rock. "will you help me study for the praxis?" you asked quietly.

rhysand's head dipped down and planted a soft kiss on your forehead. "me and all of velaris will help you through whatever you need, darling. and we will be there at your graduation, glamoured and cheering."

[napkineater]

"If I start to come undone, make like a tree and hug someone. everybody needs a place to breathe. Just recognize when it is time to leave"

Hello, and welcome to my little corner of hell! It's a bit of a mess, I know, but I added rainbow fairy lights <3

My name's either Red or Bugzie, your choice! As for pronouns, I'm fine with any and all of them, and would really rather you mix 'em up when talking about me, but otherwise I tend to enjoy they/he.

that's about the most basic summary I can give ya, but if you want more, feel free to keep reading :)

ok, now that it's just you and me, here's some more random stuff about me! I'm rather amazing, though, so don't say I didn't warn you.

I work at McDonald’s (offical verse. My name is Red 2 there. More info in tags lol)

I’m a queer person trying to carve out space for myself in the southern USA. it's a disaster most of the time, but sometimes things work out.

I'm aroace, but being aromantic is a bigger part of my identity than being ace is.

I'm agender too! But I tend to refer to myself as trans

I'm a minor, so please don't be weird

I love people, I love talking to people, I love taking care of people. I'm very much a people person, feel free to chat with me!

I love love love love love the music by both Bug Hunter and the Narcissist Cookbook. Especially Pinecones, Good Morning Sunshine, and the Simplest Words

Go listen to Good Morning Sunshine. That song is how I approach mental health, and quite literally changed my life

I have ADHD and Misophonia. There's other stuff too, but those are what I post about

no matter how much I like you, I'll always like my cat more, sorry. (in my defense, she's really fluffy)

IRL I wear alien antenna attached to my headphones every day. it's important to me that you know that

Nature time is necessary enrichment for me, or else I get all sad and stuff

I LOVE MY HUSBAND!!!! aka my QPR partner, and he's like, the best person ever.

now time for a good ol' list of interests! Both fandoms, as well as general things I'm passionate about.

the Magnus archives

poetry, shocking, I know.

I was a teenage exocolonist

philosophy

classic literature (I'm relatively new, though, so be nice)

writing

my own characters lol, both the general OC's I have, but lately I've been more focused on my characters from TCOB (the color of blood), my own little short story collection full of morality blunders, fantasy politics, and asking how much evil we can excuse in the name of "the greater good". If you ask me about this world, I will rant to you for hours.

sewing

making stuff in general, tbh

mental health and psychology (I want to be a psych nurse)

Information accessibility. Particularly plain language, publicly available legal records, and making academia less elitist and more understandable! I don't post about this like, ever, but I still really care about it.

as for tags I use, there's these, although I don't really have much of a tagging system. These are just what I use frequently

sum1 help me - generally just blunders of everyday life. I use this one a lot

Red 2 offical - any offical verse stuff. I work at McDonald’s. The rest of that is now at @mcdonalds-alien-offical

I'm so confused - look man, life is confusing

usamerican politics - this is the tag I use for any political stuff I post or reblog

everyone shut up it's outside time - sometimes I have photos of tomato's or lizards that I found in my garden. Those get tagged with this

napkin moots - stuff regarding my mutuals (I adore y’all)

I also run two other active accounts! @sugarbugzie - my art account

@mcdonalds-alien-offical - my character account for the officalverse

and ummm, that's all I can think to add for now. see ya!

[copperbadge]

I am so close to being done with Royals/Ramblers I can taste it, and it's one of those frustrating situations where the last remaining work to be done is just annoying. I have to write one damn scene, which of course is the most emotionally fraught and difficult one, and then pick from the *counts on fingers* three separate versions of the epilogue I wrote, none of which are very satisfying. I'll probably slam them all together and then sort it out somehow.

And then I definitely have to give the whole thing one more pass before I think about posting, because it's going to clock in at right around 150K words, and I already have notes on continuity issues that need fixing.

Anyway, please enjoy this scene, in which I realized at the same time Gregory and Eddie did what a great joke their names make. (Some brief context -- Joan uses she/her but doesn't like the word "princess", so she chose the gender neutral Princeps as her title.)

Friday evening, when Gregory came on the air for the address, Eddie was sitting next to him, and Joan was leaning on Eddie's shoulder. Her excitement was almost a visible thing; she'd been fussed over that afternoon, Gregory helping her pick out clothing followed by Jerry doing her makeup for camera and Eddie doing a slightly less clumsy job of braiding her hair than she generally did. 

"Good evening, Fons-Askaz, Askazer-Shivadlakia, our neighbors, and our viewers abroad," Gregory said. Behind the camera, Jerry mouthed the words along with him absently. "I'm pleased to greet you all this Friday evening and I hope you're well. I find myself, for the second time in a year, setting aside the usual issues of the day and questions from citizens to talk to you about family...."

His idea had been to talk about Joan's history just a little, then introduce her as the newest Royal, their daughter the Princeps. He could use that as a platform to present to the country his new funding package for adoptive families, meant to encourage adoption and support children coming out of the foster system. Each half of that would hopefully make the other half seem less random.

It went pretty smoothly; Eddie chimed in at all the right moments, and Joan got to say a few words of introduction at the end. After he signed off, he gave her a hug and a forehead-kiss and told her she'd done a great job. 

And then Noah, standing with Monday and Jerry behind the camera in the little studio, said, "Well, you crashed the internet again."

Gregory sighed. "Can't blame Eddie this time, can we?" 

"It was only the tourism website, and it wasn't on purpose," Eddie said. 

"He was always breaking my stuff when we were kids," Monday said.

"Nope, this one's all Joan," Noah replied. "As soon as you introduced her as your daughter, traffic started spiking -- palace website, tourism website, and every royals' Photogram."

"Katie in Communications says told you so," Jerry said, already on the phone with her.

"Joan's Photogram is down, looks like bandwidth-suck. And there goes mine, and yours," Noah said, nodding at Gregory. "There's two hashtags trending, PrincessJoan and PrincepsJoan." 

"Let me call my guy at Photogram," Eddie said, taking his phone out. 

"You have a guy just like, at Photogram?" Monday asked.

"Yeah, he handles my requests, I send him sausages," Eddie answered. 

"How is it you simultaneously live in the 22nd century and the 14th?" Monday asked. 

"Have him kill the Princess hashtag," Noah suggested.

"It's fine," Joan said. "They can use it for now, it'll keep things, um." She narrowed her eyes, searching for the word. "Segmented. Spread out the discussion a little."

"Someone's been reading my data analytics memos," Gregory said. 

"You leave 'em out," she pointed out. 

"Good news is people seem excited," Noah continued. "The hashtag's glitching, it's moving so fast, but overall pretty positive," he added.

"Well, we knew this would be intense," Gregory said. Joan, studying her own phone, squeaked. "Joan?" 

"Mas Corbin tagged me," she said, with possibly the most excitement they'd seen from her, at least since her first trip in the Jaguar. 

"The footballer?" Gregory asked, confused.

"Who?" Noah and Eddie chorused. 

"He's a Shivadh footballer, I think he's playing in Ireland right now," Gregory said, and his voice took on a slight edge as he considered some of the reasons a football player might mention his daughter. "What did he say?" 

"Dedicating my next game to my new Princeps JoanMac, long may she reign," Joan read, and Gregory relaxed. "Congrats to Gin&Tonic, she's cute as a button. Mas Corbin thinks I'm cute!"

"Gin and Tonic?" Gregory asked, and then said, "Gregory and Theophile," right as Eddie and Monday both began to laugh. "How did neither of us think of that before?"

"You get used to it," Noah said to Joan. "All kinds of famous people are going to have opinions on you."

"What do I do?!"

"Gram him back," Noah said. "Comment and say thanks and that you're a fan and you'll be watching the game."

"I'm gonna have to do a video with some gin and tonic recipes," Eddie said, as Noah and Joan debated the best wording for her response. Gregory leaned back in his chair, exhaling, and let the chaos happen around him for a minute. 

[ohnoitsz1m]

Hi!! I wasn't sure if it was okay to post this on my blog so it's here instead but I found your shop while searching for airplane dragon adopts because one of my favourite creators now have a airplane dragon model and I bought your singular airplane dragon adopt that was somehow still left there!!

Thank you so much for making them I love them!! Please feel free to ramble on about your own airplane dragons if you do answer this I am VERY fresh to everything and I wanna learn more about them 👀

Hi!!! :D thank you for buying one of my dragons :] very glad this guy was able to find a home

Also it's totally okay to post anything you buy from me on your blog or your own accounts! BUT since you asked >:] I will tell you about these guys because I love them dearly.

This is gonna be super disorganized because I just woke up and I'm packing to leave a con so I'm alllll over the place

SO! Airplane Dragons are an original species introduced by Scpkid (very popular furry adopt artist, mostly operating out of Toyhou.se and their own website these days I believe? Very easy to look up I prommy) around 2015- they are a completely open species free for anyone to make.

They can come in any variety from heavy mech to very organic and fluffy, from anthro to feral to just a straight up plane with paws! But every artist tends to draw em differently- I tend to go for a more organic look but I can dip into more mechanical depending on my purposes, here's some of my dragons, mostly Half-Life based, but some original characters ^^

I Think (though I could definitely have this wrong) airplane dragons were originally inspired by Aeromorphs, which is more Anthro Plane and less Furry, although the Aeromorph community definitely started out non-furry and then got swallowed by the furry fandom. Kinda like bronies lol. But don't let the name fool you, airplane dragons can be ANY kind of aircraft! Helicopters, space shuttles, UAVs, you name it, if it's mechanical and flies, you can make an airplane dragon of it! There really aren't hard rules for the species and it mostly just plays off vibes and what looks good To You, so if you wanna make your own, I encourage you to go crazy!

I'm on the weirder side of the furry fandom (pooltoys, aeromorphs, therianthropy, writing essays on furry history + philosophy, etc.) and I'll gladly admit that, so I tend to use aeromorphs to soften the blow when it comes to expressing that lol

I find they're a very accessible way to get people to think differently about furries and what Is and Isn't furry, both for furries and non-furries

And also I just like them! My school is LITERALLY an airport! I get to walk through the hangar around a very pretty MD-80 on my way to class every day, sometimes there's other smaller planes and jets in there too, we have a Gulfstream in there rn. PLUS I get to watch prop planes and small jets take off while I eat lunch! So this interest in planes was inevitable,, I don't even study aviation I'm a graphic design student. There's just also planes there lol

So yeah I really like Airplanes and Furries and I think other people should too, and I started making a bunch of them for Half-Life and HLVRAI and as adoptables because I wanted more people to give em a try :]

Also if ur curious further down on my blog (or should be in #hlvrai airplane dragon au or #hlvrai aeromorph au) there's a fursuit of that Benry plane. There's also just more planeguys if you search aeromorph or airplane dragon on my blog. I started using aeromorph as a catch-all term for em for several reasons that I won't get into here lol

Uhh hope this was at least a little informative ^^ enjoy your dragon! If you ever get or make any art of them I'd love to see ^^ it's not mandatory but I love receiving updates on designs people get from me lol

[bamnamuu]

Hiiii, I just saw your list of prompts, and if it's not too much work for u, I'd like to request these with Soobin :D

4. first kisses

13. “i get to know what it’s like to be loved by you” (I got friends to lovers vibes from this)

24. New years kiss

Have a good day/night!!

w.count 907 | warnings mentions drinking / drunk ppl typos not proofread | ems note THANK YOU ANON FOR REQUESTING THIS!!!!! i feel bad that it’s taken me this long to post but it only felt right to save it yk? anyway hope you love it whoever you are 🫶🫶

you have been in love with soobin since the day you met him, which happens to be since the second grade, when he found you laying on the wet tarmac letting the rain soak your uniform, “what are you doing ?” he said moving his umbrella nervously “i wanted to see if i would become a fish!” you said, trying to open your eyes to see him only to be met with rain water and the blurry silhouette of a boy looking down at you. He helped you get up and gave you his umbrella not that it would do much good but it was the thought that counts is what you said to yourself. From that day forward soobin and you have been together for everything, the first time you failed your driving test or the third time soobin failed his you two were attached at the hip. It seemed obvious to all your other friends that both of you were mad about each other, the only two people that didn’t see it was obviously you and soobin.

Walking through the science hallway Soobin was being followed by his teasing friend who was desperately trying to get soobin to go to their house party after school. “Come on Soob! This is the first time my parents are letting me stay at the house without a babysitter!’’ beomgyu said trying very hard to be convincing, soobin stopped walking to turn around and face beomgyu. “we’re in high school and you still need a BABYSITTER? Man you have more problems than me.’’ soobin said. “shush that's not the point.’’ soobin raised his brow at the shorter boy “and what exactly is the point?’’ “y/n!’’ even more confused soobin replied “what about y/n? What did you say to her, you better not have asked her to pull your finger again!’’ beomgyu looked disgusted at the accusation “I WOULD NEVER! It's just that she's coming over tonight and i thought you would like to be with your girlfriend.’’ soobin felt his cheeks get hot, he knew he should tell beomgyu that y/n’s not his girlfriend, but beomgyu already knew that and he liked that people thought they were dating. Beomgyu was jumping up and down when soobin finally gave in and agreed to go to this party. Soobin went home and wished he didn't give into beomgyu because the last thing he wanted to do on a wednesday evening was spend the night with a bunch of random school kids he doesn't want to know. Until a knock on his door pulled him from his thoughts “Hey bin your mom let me in, you ready to go?’’ flopping on his bed soobin huffed “do we have to? I mean its beomgyu but we see him everyday y/n!’’ which causes her to start laughing while walking over to sit next to him. “ok i'll make you a deal, we go to the party for 18 minutes and if you decide you want to go home well leave okay?’’ “ok, but why 18?’’ “it's more than 15 and less than 20!’’ When soobin and y/n arrived at beomgyus house they found that the ‘party’ was just the rest of soobins friend group. After a half an hour of watching beomgyu and kai try to beat each at karaoke, yeonjun Soobins eldest friend suggested truth or dare, as much as soobin loved his friends they loved teasing him more, more specifically teasing him about his crush on y/n, so it wasn't a shock to soobin when yeonjun said “I dare you to kiss soobin!’’ when y/n picked dare. The sounds of disgust and happiness filled the room as soobin and y/n leaned in to share their first kiss. “you don’t have to kiss me y’know.’’ “i know , but its you so i don’t mind.’’ Soobin smiled nervously and leaned closer to her lips.

It wasn’t long after till soobin and you became more than just friends, at your graduation soobin built up all his courage to ask you out on a real date to which you accepted with a kiss on his cheek. You made it official when you mistakenly called soobin your boyfriend to his face, and you swear you've never seen him look happier. Now the two of you are arriving to beomgyu new years eve party hand and hand. It was pretty shocking to both of you just how many people showed up tonight. “wow gyu i didn’t know you knew so many people?’’ you said finding the slightly drunk boy “i didn’t either!’’ he said before giving soobin a greeting and then hopping away, you found taehyun and kai hiding in beomgyus room watching the count down with the sound of drunk people exsisting in the next room. After a while beomgyu and yeonjun joined the four of you for some peace and quiet, and juat in time for the midnight count down to begin. “ y/n, i love you so much more than you will ever know, thank you for being my best friend for my entire life, and thank you for letting me know what its like to be loved by you!’’ soobin said placing his hands on either side of your head, smiling from ear to ear leaving you speechless as the count down camke down to 3, 2, 1, and you kissed the love of your life.

perm tag list (open) @smouches @rayoraish

[trashmouthjr]

IVE LANDED MYSELF SOMEWHERE KINDA NOT GOOD!

A month or so ago i had to up and quit my job very short notice for health/safety concerns, this sudden jump and change in income left a huge gap in my financials and i was not prepared to leave a job i had spent two and a half years at but didnt have much of a choice.

we're a single income household (me, my partner and our kitties) so its nearly impossible to get out of a financial bind once ive found myself in one, nevermind the fact that its super difficult even without falling behind on bills.

I still work full-time, my weekly average is about 46-50h and i only really get one day off a week and i use that day to take care of myself and my household's emotional/physical well-being.

So right now my only other option is taking commissions and selling adopts/ocs on my toyhouse, which is not a place i thought i would find myself in.

If you could please share this around and click the read-more for more information on my pricing, answers to questions you probably have, and skillsets please do, we would greatly appreciate the help <333

POSSIBLE ANSWERS TO POSSIBLE QUESTIONS:

Why not apply for assistance/grants/etc? i did! unfortunately it takes a long time to get a response, and right now we have exactly 45usd to our names (43usd after i take the bus home from work tonight)

What will the money be used for? Great question, i'll tell you! Food, bill catchup and household necessities as we're running on the bare basics right now, im also willing to provide receipts/my personal ledger if youre worried about where its going!

Where can i see examples/ask questions/inquire? My DMs are open on ALL social medias and up-to-date examples are available as public posts or by request, but the easiest way to catch my attention is through discord or email because im kinda old-fashioned and i check those the most :)

What do you need from a commissioner? PROPER REFERENCES, pinterest boards are helpful but ultimately give me very little to work with so please come ready with a clear idea of what youre looking for (outfits, potential pose/scene ideas, examples, background refs, etc) so i can get it right on the first go!

What forms of payment are acceptable? I have Cashapp, Paypal, Chime and my partner has Venmo (and Zelle i think but i'd have to check on that), all payments are up-front and fully refundable IN THE EVENT IM unable to complete your order, so please dont commission me if you know you'll need the money in the future.

How long will it take for you to complete my commission? Great question! depending on the detail and work that needs to be done it can be anywhere from a few days to a few weeks, but i typically give an up-front deadline, currently im working on setting up a google-doc where you can check back daily to see where im at on your order!

WILL DO'S

complicated mech/fantasy mech (no cars srry)

gore/horror

nsfw (case-to-case basis and depends on my comfort level, YOU ABSOLUTELY MUST BE 18+)

ocs

fanart

yume/selfship

pretty much anything within reason!

non-human (furries, anthro, etc)

despite the fact i have no examples of backgrounds i am fully capable of drawing them!

WONT DO'S

no C$EM, absolutely nothing depicting children as anything BUT children.

anything for commercial use, as it costs extra and my skillset isnt there yet

anything is up for discussion WITHIN REASON, just please dont be weird :'*

PRICING EXAMPLES: disclaimer: all prices are negotiable, i dont have space to be too picky at this current moment and i desperately need the help

Sketch Tier (only busts/fulls) Bust - 10.00USD (+5 additional character) Full - 15.00USD (+5 additional character)

e.g,: top image worth 20.00USD, middle image worth 25.00USD, bottom image worth 30.00USD

+5.00USD colored + shaded

comes with: high-res PDF of original sketch + rights to clean/color with credit (if you did not upgrade to have color), a fun speedpaint uploaded for you to look at, my love and appreciation (optional)

Full Tier (full color, texturing, etc,.)

PFP/Icon - 15.00USD (+5.00USD for couples/sets) Bust - 15.00USD (+10.00USD additional character) Full - 20.00USD (+10.00USD additional character)

e,g,: top image worth 30.00USD, bottom image worth roughly 35.00USD (see "beanies" section)

comes with: high-res png/jpeg, separate images of sketch + lines, a fun little speedpaint uploaded, and (optional) a beanie!

FOR AN ADDITIONAL AMOUNT i can have your final printed and shipped with some extra goodies, physical prints will come in a protective slip and additional backup prints :)

Beanie Tier (full, usually colored, a.k.a. "chibi")

Beanie - 10.00USD (+5.00USD additional character)

comes with: transparent png/jpeg file, opaque png, formatted sizing for whatever you might need it for, its cute!

Any other updates will be added to my carrd and linked on my tumblr profile, alternatively i update my toyhouse a lot more often so please check there!