#let alone it be catnip

[paniniville]

Hiya! In these tense and solitary times, I wanted to reach out and help how I can! I’m starting a series of YouTube videos where I run old World of Warcraft raids and dungeons and talk about whatever comes to mind.

This episode: Molten Core!

[mayohigan-orange]

Gosh dang, a lot of you nerds want to hug Chen!

[saetoru]

#SORRY TO INTERRUPT

「 SYNOPSIS 」 ⋮ hey siri, how do you apologize to your ex boyfriend for fucking his roommate?

— pairing ⋮ alhaitham x reader (ft. past! kaveh x reader)

— length ⋮ 2.1k words

— contents ⋮ one night stand! alhaitham, ex boyfriend! kaveh, cunnilingus, fingering, handjobs, unprotected sex, slight size kink, creampie, kaveh walking in on y’all rip

— notes ⋮ i need to suck alhaitham’s tits bro. ty catnip for beta reading i luv u

you don’t expect it, in all honesty—it happens in a blur before you even have a moment to question it.

one moment you’re exchanging snide banter with a certain scribe, and the next moment you’re in his bed. you don’t ever expect him to be so willing. in your defense, alhaitham isn’t exactly what most people would deem a casual fuck kind of guy—or so you thought.

truth be told, it’s better this way, you think.

this way, you know this is a hookup that isn’t in it for the romance—at least, you assume so, anyway. alhaitham also doesn’t really seem the kind of guy who’s looking for a relationship. so really, it’s perfect this way. getting into bed with a muscular, well-built, smart, attractive man such as him to keep your mind off your ex is a great plan if you ask yourself.

alhaitham is already far better than most of your recent hookups—you’re pleasantly surprised. he sprawls you onto his mattress, lips curving along your own gently yet firmly, knee slotting between your legs as it rubs over your dripping cunt through the fabric. you mewl against his mouth as the friction finds your clit, making your hands clutch tightly onto any part of him you can grasp—which happens to be the bulging muscles of his bicep.

“so pretty,” he mumbles, pulling away and staring down at your swollen lips and hazed eyes—and he means it. you are pretty, sweet and pliant under him as he cages you with his weight.

it’s been a while since someone’s touched you like this, like you’re fragile and precious under the fingertips that trace your dips and curves. it’s been a while since someone’s paid attention to your body like this—which makes you all the more desperate as alhaitham’s fingers hook onto the waistband of your pants, pulling them down your hips swiftly along with your underwear.

he grins as he realizes that you’re drenched—your slick glistening along your folds and making him groan at the sight. you don’t even have a moment to register what’s happening, let alone protest when his face instantly inches down to bury itself between your legs.

“oh—h-haitham,” you gasp as his tongue circles your clit, licking a stripe along your folds before finding the sensitive nub once more, making your voice break with a desperate moan.

if you weren’t so lost in the pleasure of his mouth slowly making out with your pussy, on the way his tongue traces along your entrance so perfectly before it fucks into you, you might have just fallen for him after the delicate kiss to your clit before he’s diving his tongue past your folds.

it’s been so long since someone has been this diligent with you, so long since someone has taken the time to make sure your pleasure comes first before even thinking about moving on to the main part. when was the last time? you can’t even remember.

it’s must’ve been….oh, right. the last time must’ve been during kaveh. the time before the breakup that leaves you numb and aching. the same breakup that lands you here in alhaitham’s bed in the first place, searching for something—anything—to keep your mind off of your loss.

but then, just before the pang in your heart can present itself as you think about the previous man who held your heart, just before your mind can wander to the man you’ve left behind, two thick fingers slide past your folds, curling into your sweet spot perfectly.

“f-fuck—feels good,” you sob, “so good, please, please,” you chant, grinding your cunt against his face as his lips wrap around your clit.

alhaitham is just a little cocky at the way your voice cracks—chuckling lowly as he presses yet another kiss to your clit before pulling away.

“please what?” he smirks, “c’mon, you can’t just leave a sentence unfinished now,” he urges. but he knows exactly what he’s doing—sinking his fingertips deeper into you, brushing against the velvety spot of your walls, and grinning as you whine at the feeling instead of answering his question.

“p-please—don’t stop,” you beg, moans spilling freely from your mouth, “gonna cum,” you cry.

“good,” he nods, “why don’t you be good and cum then? i’d love to see it.”

it’s instantaneous—the way you shatter for him as his fingers fuck into you fast and cruel, filling the room with the messy sound of his digits bullying into your wet cunt. his lips suck around your clit, tongue rubbing back and forth against it and making you sob as your back arches and your toes curl from the intensity of your orgasm.

it feels good—so good. alhaitham knows his way around your body, licking and sucking along every patch of skin he can find. the insides of your thighs are painted vividly with proof of his lips, and so is the valley of your breast and the column of your neck. for living in a place that frowns upon the arts the way that it does, alhaitham is an artist of his own kind. he marks every stroke of his brush against your skin deliberately, like the slow scratches of pen on paper as a story unfolds.

you can feel the strain of his cock in his pants, thick and practically throbbing through the fabric as he hovers over you and grinds his erection against your thigh.

“fuck,” he curses, arms wobbling just a little as he tries to hold himself over you. even the slightest friction against his aching length is enough to break his composure like that—and you can’t help but find it endearing. “see this?” he hums lowly, breath fanning over your lips, “see what you do to me?”

“please, alhaitham,” you whine impatiently, hand finding its way between your bodies to slip under his waistband, wrapping tightly around his thick girth and squeezing. he chokes, lets out a surprised grunt as your thumb grazes his slit and smears the pre cum leaking around his sensitive tip. “give it to me,” you say, “all of it.”

something in him snaps—something that breaks off every part of his rationality before he’s growling and sliding his pants down his legs, stiff cock meeting the cool air of the room while he hisses.

your hand finds him immediately, slowly stroking his length and squeezing around the base. he’s flushed a pretty red at the tip, leaking with pre cum and swollen as he aches painfully to sink into you, to stretch you wide and split you open on his cock.

“impatient are we?” he croaks, trying not to let his voice break as he moans softly when your thumb glides through his slit again, face falling to the crook of your neck, “mm, k-keep going,” he encourages against your skin, sucking and licking along your neck as you drag your fist up and down his length.

the filthy, squelching sound of his cock fucking into your first is all but deafening, overtaking your senses as you focus on the way he’s hot and heavy in your hands, thick and curved just right that you know he’ll fill you up perfectly and then some.

and just as you’re about to plead, to beg desperately to just let you feel him already, he grabs your wrist and pins it over your head, grabbing his cock and gritting his teeth as the uncomfortable ache of his orgasm dying down settles in. the blunt head of his length nudges against your entrance, making you gasp before he slowly inches into you.

he’s big—he takes a good amount of time slowly sinking into you as you try to accommodate his size.

“‘s big,” you sniffle, “too big. won’t fit—can’t fit it all,” you try to tell him, but he scoffs, hand grabbing your cheeks and squeezing them together as he tilts your head to meet his gaze.

“oh yeah? think you know better than me?” he raises a brow, making your teary eyes widen as he sinks a little deeper into you. the stretch stings—but you can’t deny that the drag of every vein along your tight walls makes your head spin and spine jolt with pleasure. “we’ll make it fit,” he growls, “and it’ll fit just fine too. that much, i can assure.”

but even as stern as his words are, his lips are gentle as they kiss away the tears, mapping your skin sweetly as the last bit of him slides into you and he bottoms out. he groans, panting erratically against your forehead as your tight walls hug around his cock. he needs to cum—needs to fill you up and fuck you until you’re dripping the remains of his cum that leaks from your folds.

his hips roll with a steady rhythm, yet another mystery as to how someone so smart and serious is so skilled with the arts. alhaitham fucks you like he hits every note of a tune you don’t think you’ll ever forget, stuck in your mind to replay over and over as you feel him slam against every sensitive spot deep within you. his hips slam against yours and the sound of skin slapping rings in your ears like background music. but the sound of his voice—melodic against your ear and sweet as it sings moans and praises makes your walls flutter around him.

“so tight,” he grunts, “s-so tight,” he pants against your ear, voice breathy and soft, “don’t know how long i’ll last like this.”

his thumb moves between your bodies to circle your clit, making your head fall back against the plush of the pillows under you, eyes fluttering shut and mouth hanging open as wanton moans spill from your lips.

sometimes, when you miss kaveh a little extra, when the nights are lonely and the bed is even lonelier, you find yourself seeking out the warmth of another body. usually, your mind always craves the touch of your ex boyfriend, aching to feel the familiarity of soft blonde strands of hair between your fingers and the heat of his pale skin against yours. you find the remnants of your love in the strangers your bed, holding onto the few seconds that you can trick yourself into thinking the body pressed against yours is the one you wish for so desperately.

but somehow…something with alhaitham doesn’t feel like every other time. this time, you don’t let your mind unconsciously slip into imagining kaveh. this time, you’re distinctly aware that it’s alhaitham hovering over you, that it’s alhaitham bullying his thick cock into your abused cunt, that it’s alhaitham moaning into your ear, that it’s alhaitham lighting up your body as you reach the precipice of your high.

and all too suddenly, his mouth presses against yours, tasting you like there’s decadence on your tongue and sweetness that trickles from your lips. his hips are sloppy as they angle into you, the mess of slick and pre cum coating your inner thighs and forming a ring around the base of his cock. his voice lilts to a soft whine as you squeeze around him, the thick head of his cock kissing the parts deep within you that make your hips jolt and your mind haze with pleasure.

“c-close,” you whimper sweetly, “so close, ‘m gonna…gonna cum—”

“i know,” he rasps, “i know, me too. cum with me.” if you didn’t know any better, you’d say the last part comes out as a plea, a slightly needy tone that makes your walls quiver around him.

with a few more harsh strokes of his thumb over your clit, you cum with a wail, and he follows you not long after, the deep rasp of your name falling off his tongue like a prayer as his hips still and his cum fills your cunt with thick ropes. he fucks his load into you sloppily, lost from any rhythm as he desperately rolls his hips and drills his cock into you while riding through the shocks of his orgasm.

your fingers thread through his hair, sweaty and soft under your touch—and the deep groan you pull from him as you tug almost makes you cum again from the sound alone. with a few more thrusts of his hips, he collapses beside you, panting as his chest rises and falls while he catches his breath.

after a while, he glances at you from the corner of his eyes, “uh…are you…are you okay? was i…did i hurt—”

“i’m fine,” you snort, grinning at him. it’s almost…cute—the way his cheeks flush and his lips are almost a pout as he scoffs.

“you don’t have to laugh,” he grumbles, “there’s nothing funny about asking a regular question.”

“i’m not laughing at you,” you tease, “i’m laughing with you.”

“well, that makes no sense. i’m not laughing at all,” he rolls his eyes.

“well, you—”

you’re cut off by the door being pushed open, the creak making both of your heads turn to the source of your interruption. instantly, alhaitham’s face sours—but you pause, eyes wide and mouth dry as you take in just who’s at the door and just whose voice you’re hearing.

“are you ignoring me on purpose? i’ve been calling out for the past—” kaveh’s eyes are wide, mouth parted as he stops mid-sentence and his eyes linger on your face before registering your lack of clothing. the hand on the doorknob tightens its grip and his face turns red while his eyes narrow.

“k-kaveh?” you whisper.

“you know each other?” you can faintly hear alhaitham’s confused voice beside you, but you’re too busy watching as hurt and then anger sink into kaveh’s features.

“well, i’ll just leave my roommate and my past lover to their devices then,” he spits coldly, “sorry to interrupt.”

and before you can ask him to wait, before alhaitham’s hand can reach for you as you hurriedly climb out of bed to chase after the blonde, the door slams hard enough that you can almost feel the walls shake.

© hanmas do not plagiarize, repost, translate to other sites, or recommend on platforms outside tumblr such as tik tok

[chapel-of-rizztual]

Random ghoul Headcanon 2

Dew hates sleeping alone. Ever since he was summoned he’s hated it and he doesn’t know why. He normally ends up snuggled up with aether in his nest but he has been known to fall asleep on mountains chest like a little cat.

Mountain is like them big dogs that think they’re really small. He doesn’t even realise how big he is and you will end up with a lap full of giant ghoul.

All ghouls can see in the dark. They have the same reflective eyes as cats do.

Copia once got the ghouls catnip as a sort of prank/joke present. It was less of a joke when the ghouls went absolutely feral over it. He’s getting them all some more for Christmas.

Swiss and aether go absolutely ham in ikea. They’re not allowed to go unsupervised anymore.

Cumulus licks the incense sticks they use for rituals. Nobody knows she does this.

Aether has an impressive collection of awful dad shirts. And they really are ugly. He tries to get on from each country they’ve visited. Mountain and Swiss steal them sometimes.

Rain eats salt right out the tub. Sometime he’ll pour it into a bowl and add water to make saltwater cereal.

When dew was first summoned he was really scared, especially of sleeping, so copia gave him a plushie. It was one of the ikea rats that someone gave him as a joke and he half expected dew to toss it aside like he had done but dew became really protective over the little thing. He slept with every night. If it ever went missing he’d flip out. He still sleeps with it sometimes. Copia did the same with sunshine when she was first summoned but with a blanket. She still sleeps with wrapped around her.

Candles are banned from the ghouls den because Swiss was caught drinking the melted wax. He got cumulus to join him but she never got caught.

Copia very quickly learnt that the ghouls loved laser pens. They have no idea where the little red light comes from and will chase it around for hours. He once put a disco ball up in the den thinking it would work the same. It was even better. He walked into the den to see all the ghouls spinning in circles trying to chase a specific reflection while crashing into each other. It was a mess. No chores got done that day.

Ghouls can’t get drunk on regular human alcohol so mountain makes it for them. It’s strong enough to get even the biggest ghoul off their face. He also grows weed.

Aether always keeps a hair tie in his wrist for dew. He knows his hair gets in his face sometimes and bothers him but he never had a hair tie with him so aether keeps one for him.

Cirrus and dew both have their nipples pierced. Cirrus has bars and dew has rings. They’ve gotten them stuck together more then once. Mountain laughed so hard trying to untangle them he had to get rain to help him. Rain was no help.

Mountain is terrified of rabbits. He runs to cirrus for comfort whenever he sees one.

Swiss loves working in the nursery. He loves babies and thinks human babies are fascinating. The feeling is mutual the babies love him just as much.

Mountain currently reading twilight to dew upon dew’s request. They’ve made it into new moon. Dew got so mad that “Edward would leave Bella to a dog” he nearly set the book on fire. They’re both team Edward.

Most of the ghouls are early riser's, often rising with the sun. Except rain and cumulus. They can both sleep forever if you’d let them.they’re often found still curled up together asleep at midday. They’re often the last ones to leave the bed or the nest.

[rjalker]

So you want to write scifi?

You have your characters bringing along some plants to an alien planet??

Please for the love of fuck join a gods damned online gardening group and ask questions about the plants you are writing about. Even if you're just writing about them in passing and don't think it's important.

Ask if any of the people in the gardening group would check over your writing.

You would not believe how many science fiction writers think "bringing mint to an alien planet" is a totally normal casual thing to do.

Or think that it's possible to "run out of" catnip, which is a type of mint, plants.

Literally a major point of tension in Plague Ship was the fact that they "ran out" of catnip plants to sell. When neither the characters nor the author were aware of let alone concerned about the concept of genetic diversity.

Do you understand how absurd this problem is? Running out of catnip plants??? When you have endless access to soil, water, and light???

If you don't, then that is exactly why you need to do proper reasearch before randomly writing about plants in scifi settings.

If you're planning to include any real actual plants in your setting and your intention is NOT to have your characters accidentally create an ecological disaster.....

please for the love of fuck just look up gardening groups on facebook and find a nerd and ask them to give you some tips and constructive criticism for how you plan to use plants in your scifi setting.

If your characters purposefully bring any type of mint at all to plant on an alien planet they should be considered interplanetary ecological terrorists. And I'm not even joking.

And that's just talking about mint. This isn't even getting into how horrifically literally any "lets bring crops/livestock from Earth to an alien planet" should be going.

Please actually research plants before you include them in your scifi setting. No matter how casual you think the statement is. Talk to people who grow the plants. Maybe fucking grow them yourself if you have the space and are in the right climate. Do real actual reasearch. Understand the plants you are talking about before you casually throw them into your setting.

If you don't understand why bringing mint to an alien planet means you should be considered an ecological terrorist you've got no business writing about plants in scifi. Just make your characters eat synthesized nutrition goo. Please.

[sonicasura]

Feral Plagas!Leon but he acts more like an energetic cat that was just given catnip. The pills used to suppress the Plagas growth alongside the miniscule inactive viruses from his previous adventures just toasts the bug's original nature. It's relationship with Leon becomes akin to Venom with the mind of a stubborn toddler.

Don't give it sweets and the guy will be bouncing around like a lunatic until you catch him on a tree covered in fresh sap. Leon arches his back like the Halloween Black Cat with his tail plus spike spines flared up if spooked. Becomes a pure chittering mess if given anything that contains honey or maple syrup. Meat honey from vulture bees is Plagas!Leon's favorite so it's best to keep stock.

Complete and total hoarder. He loves to collect stuff in this feral state akin to a bower bird. If it gets Leon's attention, then it's added to his makeshift hive like nest. Man has a few scratching posts and something very durable to chew on. Got a tendency of stealing animals like rabbits or chickens for the purpose of being pets.

Any nest Plagas!Leon makes is a mix between old clothes, bedding materials, and a unique type of saliva he can produce. The slime is very adhesive that it'll put even the strongest glues to shame. Leon's saliva has minor healing properties.

It's usually made in a web form than liquid to heavily reduce the adhesiveness and make it easier to remove. He can also make a powerful acid with the purpose of making pathways. Leon has quite a number hidden in Spain with only one not made during a feral episode.

He is absolutely embarrassed once a feral episode comes to an end as he's fully conscious for every moment. Especially since tantrums are a given in this state and he'll wreck furniture out of spite. Saddler trying to control the parasite just pisses it off instead so Plagas!Leon is even more vicious when fighting the cult.

In fact, he will even EAT the other Plagas as rage lets loose cannibalistic tendencies from its altered nature. A good chunk of insects do feed on other members of their species so don't be surprised if its true here. Leon later admits that they taste like chicken much to Ashley's disgust and Luis' morbid fascination.

Zoomies happen a lot even more so during a feral episode. His body tends to produce too much energy and Leon has to expel it. A human sized hamster wheel or hamster ball is always brought up with Ashley even thinking of a design. Leon wasn't amused.

Completely territorial especially when a huge threat such as Krauser is nearby. Half the time Feral Plagas!Leon will cut down the threat or get his 'swarm' to safety. (Leads to a Luis lives situation) Ashley and Luis are HIS, same goes for anyone else that he can trust and likes.

Feral episodes has a 50/50 chance that he'll shift into 'bug mode'. His appearance heavily morphing to an insectoid yet oddly reptilian visage. It's completely random so what comes come. Plagas!Leon still acts the same although he might carry Ashley or Luis by the scruff of their shirt with his fangs.

His abilities are heavily amplified in bug mode than just size alone. Leon's acid can melt steel than just rock, his adhesive saliva now hardens into a cocoon like shell, and any webbing produced is able to treat more extensive injuries such as 2nd degree burns. You can say he's more of a tank or sentinel from roleplaying games in this state.

Overall, the man is just relieved that he isn't going to hurt anyone innocent thanks to his new infected status. Although Leon will never tell anyone about the time he almost ate a Karen's annoying corgi. Guy's Plagas was hangry that day.

Plagas!Leon: War Mode

[hiraya-rawr]

I love your cat reader and Gorou fic!! It's so cute and fun and the with mentioning heats it got my mind spinning

Like imagine being in heat and having Gorou gently groom/coddle you to help distract you from the pain and get the attention you craved 🥺 I just think it'd be super cute

a/n: Anon you made me go research about cat heat symptoms and effects- hnnngggshhdj honestly such a cute idea!!! I love it so here's a brainrot. Although I did research about heats, im changing it a bit for the fic to work. please don't use this as a basis for what your cats are good through.

notes: istg it's a SFW brainrot, heats, Kätzlein Reader (Diona's cat bloodline), mutual pining!! sleep deprived work

masterlist | based on this drabble and this brainrot

Heats & Distractions (Cat!Reader x Gorou) SFW

Being a part of the Kätzlein clan had its difficulties; from controlling your natural instincts in front of your human comrades to dealing with your addiction to catnip, you handled them all through life long practice and discipline.

There are times when you have to keep your impulses in check though. Things like pouncing on birds and taking random naps were easily controlled — but other things, like reminding yourself that the ingrained feeling of danger around your general was just your cat side talking, was a bit more difficult to deal with.

Another issue was your heat. As the season of spring blossoms around Inazuma, your body begins to heat up in discomfort. It started as a numb ache in your lower stomach. The ache wasn't exactly painful, but it was bothersome enough to distract you from focusing on your tasks.

You keep dropping things and stumbling, mind hazy from heat and feeling constantly distracted. Kazuha's worried about you; He has an arm around your shoulder, taking your things instead and asking if you're feeling alright.

You reassure him that you're fine, just tired. You're a little shy about admitting that it's your heat. He encourages you to take a break in the medical quarters and before you could register where he's leading you, you're already on the way.

You don't want to go to the medical, though. They don't exactly have anything that could help you and revealing your... situation to any of the nurses and soldiers would only warrant teasing and jokes from the immature ones.

It was Gorou who stops you and Kazuha. He's standing in front of you two, eyeing you up and down. Kazuha explains the situation that you weren't feeling well and you, again, say you're fine.

Gorou sighs and brushes a hand through his hair, before taking you by the wrist away from the medical. "They're fine, Kazuha,"

Kazuha confusingly protests at his friend, but Gorou quickly turns to whisper to him.

"It's... a hybrid thing. It's spring." Gorou says and Kazuha, with realization dawning on his face, nods and lets you go with the general.

You're both alone now, in a corner by the training area when he stops to look at you again.

"Why are you out? Shouldn't you be resting?"

"I really am fine! I'm not sick. Kazuha's overreacting-"

"You do know I could smell your heat from a mile away?"

You freeze, mouth agape as you stare, blush rising to your face. He knew? Your long time crush since you arrived in the resistance knew? You didn't think it would be that obvious to another hybrid of a different species but it was slightly embarrassing.

"I thought I could ignore it!" You groan, admitting your situation, "It doesn't hurt much but I- just so-" You mutter off, dizzy.

Gorou sighs, "Let's get you to your barracks. As your general, I'm putting you on bed rest for the next few days. Or whatever long this takes."

You blush, following along as he guides you to your personal quarters.

Most days, you really were fine! Taking walks around the area and helping patrol, other days, you were a whining mess, purring and pawing at your bedsheets in discomfort. Had you been back in Mondstadt, perhaps you could've found ways to alleviate the symptoms from your clan, but here you were a thousand miles away fighting a dictatorship.

What you didn't expect was for the general to visit your quarters every so often. The first time he entered with a plate of salmon from the kitchen, your ears and tail perked up in excitement.

Forget the fact that your natural mortal enemy slash crush was in your room — he brought you salmon! He would sit by your bed, chatting about what was going on in the army. To you, it sounded like he was a soldier giving his daily reports, which you found funny considering he was the general.

It was when you realized how helpful it was as a distraction from the numbing ache did you learn to fully appreciate his presence.

Of course, heats don't usually go so smoothly. It was a particularly bad night when you crumpled yourself in bed, arms wrapping around your waist as the ache was starting dull your senses. You needed to feel something, anything to ground yourself back from your dizzy state.

Gorou walked in that night with a can of tuna. Something that was promptly ignored and left on your bedside as he rushed over to you. His hands gently on your shoulder.

"Hey hey, I'm here. You okay?" He worriedly thinks back to his own heats. He usually goes through them just fine, with the war being a good distraction, but he isn't sure how much dog heats and cat heats resemble in terms of treatment. He wasn't quite sure what to do for you.

"G-gorou!" You quietly sob, "I hate this! I- I need something- stimuli-!" Your hand reaches out to grip on his top. He sits on your bed, brushing away the strands of hair from your face.

"It's okay, you're okay," He reassures you, patting your head.

Your grip on his loosened as he brushes against your ears. A silence settles itself between you. He rubs both your ears gently, warm and calloused hands softly massaging the sensitive muscles. You sigh in relief, unconsciously snuggling up to his abdomen.

"Lay down with me," You mumble after a while of his massage. You were in a daze now, an almost drunken state of exhaustion from dealing with your heat. Gorou looks at you hesitantly before laying down next to you.

Your long tail finds its way on his stomach. He figures you wanted him to pet it as he carefully brushes through the fur.

"Don't you go through this too?" You ask, attempting to start a casual conversation. Your eyes were closed as you cuddle up to his side.

"Yeah but it's already over," He tells you, turning his head to look at you. Both your faces closer than necessary.

"I guess you don't have it as bad?" You giggle and he notices how much he likes the sound of your laugh.

"Not exactly. I mean, Kazuha and her excellency would help distract me whenever it gets too bad. But I guess you can say I know how you feel."

Suddenly, you groan and look up the ceiling, "This wouldn't be a problem at all if we had mates!"

"W-what!" Gorou sits up, face turning red.

"What? Why so blushy, general? I mean, wouldn't it be easier to go through heats with a lover-" You laugh, sitting up as well, "Unless... you were thinking that I wanted us to be mates-"

"No! Of course not," His ears twitch frantically, hands dropping your tail, "I m-mean, we're friends! And you're part cat, I'm part dog, don't you think that's kind of... I don't know, weird?"

He doesn't notice the way your smile drops from your face. You gaze away from him, voice turning low into a whisper.

"... Is it really that weird?" You mumble and he's looking back at you as you look anywhere but back at him, "For a cat and dog to be together?"

Gorou tilts his head confusingly. He gets a feeling that something has shifted in the air, like he said something wrong but he isn't quite sure what. "Wouldn't it be? They're complete opposites in terms of their nature." He says.

Your eyes linger on him before you break out into a small laugh, "I guess it does sound weird! Besides, as you've said-" You flop back down your bed, "We're just friends."

"Ah- yeah..." Gorou isn't sure how the situation turned awkward. He's unsure whether he should lay back down on your bed either.

"Thanks for comforting me with my heat, but you should really go now," You say, picking up the forgotten can of tuna next to your bed.

Gorou quietly leaves your quarters that night. When he walks back to his barracks, eyes on the wide night sky, he thinks back to your form snuggling to him.

He thinks of your face that was unnecessarily close to for friends; of your shared whispers that were too intimate between a general and his soldier.

Gorou doesn't understand cats. He doesn't understand why his heart feels heavier than usual either.

note: I didn't mean for this to be angst but here we are. fun fact! but the heat scene was actually inspired by something that happened during my period. I get really bad cramps, one time I was puking and heaving terribly, i couldnt even lie down properly without sobbing in pain. my ex stayed by me that time and grounded me whenever i get dizzy.

[books-and-catears]

Can I request Satan with cat magnet reader

You mean Satan's IDEAL type? Of course you can. Thank you so much for this ask. This is gonna be fun to write!

Purrfect Partner

"Hello MC, I'm back, did you wait long-" Satan stopped in his tracks watching the scene infront of him.

He first saw this ability of yours during your first trip around Devildom with him. He had only been gone for a few minutes, to freshen up nearby.

And when he came back, you had every cat in the vicinity, nuzzling up against your legs or laying on your lap with you patting them gently.

"How...?"

Satan stood there his mouth agape. He only came back to his senses after a few cats scampered over to him.

"Do you somehow have catnip on you, MC?" He asked after a pause.

"Not at all. I didn't even know there were cats in Devildom. Let alone this many." You looked far from suprised. You picked up a black kitten and placed it on your shoulder. "I wish I brought more food for you, little darlings."

Satan smiled. "You really know your way around cats, huh? Have some back at home?"

"Strays mostly. I always carried food around because somehow huge bunches of them gathered around me whenever they were close."

"Wait...this is a usual occurence for you?!" Satan was taken aback. And as you nodded and cradled a ginger tabby, his hands shook in excitement. You were officially his favourite being in the world now.

He refused to leave the house without you. In fact, he'd make up stupid excuses to get you to go out.

It started as a walk around the park and returning library books. And now it was to simply observe a peculiar snake that was lying deathly still on the road.

"That's just a tree branch, Satan." You laughed.

"I swear it was moving yesterday." He said while two cats perched on his shoulder. This was his personal heaven.

He didn't stop there. He third wheeled your outings with his brothers shamelessly.

"Oi Satan! What's the big idea following me and MC and me around like this?!" Mammon snapped.

"To protect MC from any witches that might come to collect their debt from you." Satan said simply, petting the cat lying belly up in your lap.

"I can protect MC myself, you cat-obessesed prick!"

"Satan. Come to the entrance immediately." Lucifer's voice booked across the whole house.

Satan was in the middle of conversation with you about various personalities of cats.

"What the hell does that pompous arse want now? Excuse me, MC. Please sit tight, I'll be right back." He begrudgingly arrived at the entrance.

"What do you want now, Lucifer?"

"Perhaps you can explain this." Lucifer gritted his teeth and held the door open.

Satan gasped audibly. It seemed like all the cats of Devildom had come to the House of Lamentation at once. The large chorus of mewling and purring was music to his ears.

"This must be a dream..." Satan laughed and picked up one that snuck in through the door. "I didn't even try to summon you yet!"

Lucifer shook his head. "Snap out of it, Satan. Undo whatever horrid spell you seem to have cast or there will be consequences."

"Like I said I haven't done anything." Satan said, "I was literally up in my room all evening, talking to MC-"

MEAAOWWWW!

It was like your name was a spell. Merely at the sound of it, the rest of the cats barged in through the unlocked doors and windows at once.

Lucifer had long toppled over and Satan watched in awe as most of them raced upstairs. He followed them up only to find them in your room. Sitting still, waiting.

Had they all come specefically for YOU?

"Ah never a dull moment in this house." Solomon laughed as he appeared in the doorway. "I see MC's still having a hard time supressing the intensity of their cat affinity."

"Cat affinity? Is it a magical skill you can learn?!" Satan was more than eager.

"Not at all. Some humans have a natural affinity to animals. Most of them have a more balanced affinity to all species. But few humans have a specific affinity. Because of which it is more intense than the general ones. Essentially MC seems to be a cat magnet." Solomon explained.

"Is that why you came here? To provide convenient exposition?" Levi appeared at the end of the hallway, three cats clinging onto his clothes. "Can MC call these off me already?!"

And soon there were screams of suprise and shock ringing throughout the house.

"You can't chew on my leather jacket! Do you know expensive that is, you stupid cat?!"

"STOOOP! How could you pee in my room like this!?"

"Lucifer! We're out of milk! Looks like the cats drank it all! And they're going for the rest of the food now!"

"Stop sleeping on my damn face! Go bother Satan instead!"

"SATAN FIX THIS MESS IMMEDIATELY OR ELSE -"

"Well well it seems MC has an affinity for chaos too." Solomon grinned as picked up a few kitties himself as the others crowded around Satan's room where you sat clueless.

[rea-grimm]

Tiger Zoro

Imagine Zoro being tiger shapeshifter

Zoro purrs when you treat his wounds and massage him a bit - when you ask about it he stops, he doesn't want to talk about it, especially if the cook doesn't know about it

Even if he orients himself by smell, although it is not as developed as cats or dogs, he recognizes those closest to him by that, he can still get lost - but if you call him he will come back, even if it won't be right away - you may call him more than once to be sure

Weakness: catnip - worse than sake - he loses control of his claws, stripes appear on his body - he becomes a giant kitten who likes to be cuddled and at that moment you are only his and no one is allowed to come near you and he will growl at everyone else - instead of a kiss he will lick your face and purr - This is how you find out that you have a chance with him

He likes to bask in the sun, and he always falls asleep there - if he wakes up with you next to him, he will carefully pull you closer and continue

When he goes to practice, he takes you with him as a weight for more - sometimes you train with him - practice fights

His tail is a sensitive place and he hates being touched there because several times they pulled his tail as if it was a toy, or when he was sleeping they stepped on him - when he walks around you, sometimes he let it brush against your hand - you can afford more in private - He loves your hands because they can be so gentle

He stays in human form most of the time, and goes into a sort of hybrid in combat, when he has stripes all around his body, but rarely uses his full tiger form

You first saw him as a giant green tiger right after the fight when the marines swarmed you and it was time to run away - in that form Zoro was faster - he changed and wanted you to sit on his back and hold his swords - but you had to navigate him while you were running away

Sometimes when you're alone and you nicely ask him, to change to full tiger, because he is like a big stuffed animal - cuddling - he teases you with kitten kisses

Zoro Masterlist

[ficsyoumayhavemissed]

Blossom by Blossom The Spring Begins — taggiecb

499 words / Harry x Louis

It's the first day of spring!

This fic is all sorts of sweet and wonderful. You can definitely fall in love with the characters. Though very short, it’s just so lovely!

For That, I’ll Say — zanni_scaramouche / @zanniscaramouche

1.180 words / Harry x Niall, Harry x Liam, Harry x Zayn, Harry x Louis

Thank you, next Harry's experience with love, patience, and pain

This is a gorgeous, poetic, second-person perspective fic that shows glimpses of each of Harry’s relationships both past and future. So sweet and a little bit painful.

Cursing the Daylight — LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup

1.599 words / @harryshouseficfest / Harry x Louis

Oh, how Harry wishes the sun would never rise again, how he wishes he’d never have to worry about it. There’s something so treacherous about daylight. The sun beating down on the people below, supposedly filling them with happiness. Harry doesn’t understand that at all, the idea of sunlight alone makes his head pound, the way it feels like it’s melting his very bones.

The drama, the angst, the deep existential loneliness and then the reprieve, the sweetness and the caring. This is just fantastic!

Catnip — Randomly_Unfortunate

2.283 words / Harry x Louis

Harry is the Crazy Cat Person™ next door and his cats keep getting into Louis' gardens.

If you’re on the hunt for fics with fluff and humor this fic is hands down one of those rare gems you only ever find when the stars align perfectly.

Gem and the Hunters: The Treasure of Babylon — asphodelknox / @iamasphodelknox

34.602 words / Harry x Louis

“Were you so sure I would say yes?” Louis asked, already knowing the answer. “You’re my best friend, Louis Tomlinson. I know you better than you know yourself.” Niall pointed at him. “You say losing Babylon was terrible and you’re right, it was. But you wouldn’t turn down a second chance.” Louis rolled his eyes at his friend. “What makes you say that?” Niall just grinned. “You’re too curious.” Louis Tomlinson wished, for one thing, his whole life: to find the ancient city of Babylon. After one failed attempt, he swore to never again attempt a search for the city. His friend, Niall Horan never pushed the issue, but when his family finds themselves in trouble, Niall’s only option is to convince Louis to try and find Babylon again. Niall enlists the help of two famous treasure hunters: Harry and Gemma Styles and their friend Liam Payne. Harry and Gemma love ancient cultures as much as Louis and would give anything to find Babylon. Liam is just along for the ride, running from a shade in his past. The five embark on the adventure of a lifetime… and find much more than any of them bargained for.

If you want a warm, cozy adventure with a small dash of romance that lets the action drive the fic forward, look no further. This fic is sweet and fun and full of danger. There are some trigger warnings, so be sure to look for them before you dive in, but overall, this fic is a really good time.

Gem and the Hunters: The Struggle for Angkor Wat — asphodelknox / @iamasphodelknox

48.208 words / Harry x Louis

The Adventures of Gemma Styles and her treasure hunters continues as the group ventures to the Far East in search of Lord Malik. What starts out as a journey to find a missing idol turns into a trek into their own hearts, desires, and futures. Or the one where Gemma is top of it in all aspects of her life (except one), Niall is more competent than any of them expect, Harry and Louis are oblivious idiots, and Liam hates Zayn… until he doesn't.

The sequel to Gem and the Hunters: The Treasure of Babylon, this fic has even more of what I loved in the first fic. There are more sweet moments, more romance, and more action! Not a fic to be missed.

—-

As always, support the authors by leaving kudos and comments! Happy reading!

If you love a fic that has gotten less love than you think it deserves, submit it to us so we can check it out and perhaps add it to one of our recs! — FYMHM xx

[blindmagdalena]

Hiii, how are you? I can't seem to leave you alone.

Can you write about a reader that loves Homelander to an unhealthy amount? Like she is completely obsessed with and possessive of him. She wants to be with him all the time and do everything together, in her eyes he can do no wrong, in her world there's only him. Would he be annoyed at that much attention 24/7 or would he bask in it?

hello mari!!! ahaha i'm glad, because this prompt inspired my latest fic, Don't Fret Precious (I'm Here)! which, i'm pretty sure, is the longest single chapter fic i've written to this day. i don't know that it entirely hit all the marks here, but it was VERY fun to write, so thank you!

to answer your question more concisely here, Homelander is wildly volatile, and he's (despite himself) very much human. he's going to have good and bad days, he's going to snap, he'll get defensive and blame the people around him for it, but ultimately that kind of devotion and attention would be like catnip to him. Homelander is a black hole when it comes to praise and affection; there is an emptiness inside him that simply cannot be filled, but he will never stop trying.

finding someone who was capable of feeding into that to this degree? he'd never let them go.

[pluckyredhead]

So, I can’t find it now, but one time I think you mentioned that no one writes Gar/Vic even though the 80s Teen Titans series is like God’s gift to slash shippers where they’re concerned. Like, if you told me that based on their interactions, they were meant to be dating/hooking up/friends with benefits, I would instantly believe you. And yet, fandom has always slept on them? Why do you think that is? Is it because neither are conventionally “pretty” characters?

THEY ARE SO MARRIED FOR LIKE THREE DECADES. Someday I'll post my ship manifesto because yeah, the level of in love they are in NTT is UNREAL. The scene of Vic shouting "I love you! Do you hear me? I love you!" at Gar while merging with the Technis alone. My god.

Anyway I think it's a few reasons:

They aren't Bats. Back when I first joined DC fandom like 20 years ago, it was much more universally accepted that they were functionally married, but there was still barely any fic about them (all on personal archive sites and impossible to find now). I think it was partly the same deal Boostle had at the time, which was that everyone already knew they were married so why bother to write the fic when it was already accepted fact, but mostly it's just...they aren't Bats, and even then, most of the fic was about Bats.

The cartoon was pretty bad for the ship. Don't get me wrong, I love the animated Teen Titans, but because of the size difference and Gar's voice being at a much higher pitch, I think they read as further apart in age than they really are, and also as Idiot Bros rather than the slow burn enemies to friends to lovers they are in comics canon.

Plus the Gar/Raven pairing came out of the show, which is weird because it's...not actually in the show, but that's when it became popular with show fandom, and that bled over into the comics, and now it's a really dominant pairing for those characters even though it reads...really, really weirdly in the context of their history in the 80s and 90s. (Remember when she possessed him?)

Right after Gar/Raven became the Blandest Ship of All (sorry), the New 52 happened and Vic's connection to the rest of the Titans was completely severed in favor of him standing around in the background of JL issues not being allowed to do anything interesting. Like I guess it was a promotion, sort of? But it came at the cost of his history, relationships, and personality.

Let's name the elephant in the room: Vic is Black, and fandom has a bad habit of not writing fic about Black characters even when the ship is obvious fandom catnip.

In conclusion: Vic and Gar are married, as dumb as Future State was I did enjoy that they merged into one homoerotic being, and "Hey rust-bucket! Let go of the frickin' MOON already, will ya?!" is still the most romantic line in all of comics.

[thekatebridgerton]

What is the most creative way Eloise cockblocks Colin?

She arranges surprise visits from their family members of the family. Basically Eloise let's it drop oh so casually that Colin is ' free tonight to babysit, you should ask him Anthony, go to his place with the kids I'm sure he'll love it '

'Benedict you know who has your art utensils hidden at his place? Colin, I put... I mean he put them under the fainting couch in the library '

Colin and Penelope promenading alone together? Why Sir Newton is that bacon in Colin's pocket? Go be a good doggy and don't let him get close to Penelope. Bite that bacon

Stowing away from a ball with Eloise best friend in tow? That's the perfect time for a group activity, like playing catch the Weasel. Colin is the Weasel!

Eloise has been known to put catnip in Colin's trousers just so the neighborhood cats will stare at him and follow him around making noise whenever he's trying to sneak in the Featherington house.

Believe me, she gets really really creative

[hualianff]

10 examples of HC’s cat, E’Ming, being a brat:

1. Pushing things off counters such as his keys, hand towels, paperwork, and hair ties - especially when HC is looking directly at her.

2. HC suddenly fighting for his life in the middle of the night because E’Ming decided to plop herself right on HC’s chest, staring at him with owl eyes, daring him to push her off.

HC does. Except this continues to happen numerous times throughout the night. HC gives up and goes back to sleep with shallow breaths.

Then wakes up at 6 AM sharp to E’Ming violently making biscuits on his tiddies, reminding him it’s breakfast time.

3. E’Ming randomly nipping him when he’s just trying to pet her, damn it! But during the times HC is preoccupied, E’Ming yowls like she’s paid to get the neighbors to call animal services on them!

4. Walking all over HC’s keyboard when he’s trying to work. Sitting on the exact papers he’s trying to look at. Chewing on his fancy pens.

5. Being a PICKY eater.

6. Perching menacingly on the bathroom counter while he showers, staring directly through the glass door.

7. Escaping once a month, also known as giving HC a heart attack once a month.

8. Weaving through his long legs to the point HC trips when trying to avoid stepping on her.

9. E’Ming pawing at the bead in HC’s braided hair.

HC: “NO-“

E’Ming: “MREOWWW!” *bites on the braid*

10. E’Ming scaling HC’s back when she wants to be held, ripping the back of his shirts in the process.

***

1 pro that makes the previous 10 things less insufferable:

1. E’Ming is a Gege-attractor.

***

1 con that cancels out the previous pro:

1. E’Ming is a Gege-hogger.

[extra: E’Ming is a blue-baller.]

***

1. E’Ming wiggling her way between gege’s legs while Hualian make out on the couch…

HC: “DAMN IT NOT NOW-“

XL: “hi sweet girl~”

2. E’Ming loafing on XL’s chest as he lays on the couch. HC comes to join but as he leans forward to kiss XL, E’Ming places her paw on his lips-

HC: “the audacity of my fucking cat- MOVE-!”

Before HC can pick E’Ming up, the cat has wrapped her body around XL’s neck, purring up a storm. XL laughs in delight. His hands gently pet E’Ming’s black, soft fur.

XL: “my noble, gracious protector” *kisses E’Ming’s fur*

HC: 🧍‍♂️

3. E’Ming appearing out of nowhere to aggressively bat HC’s head as he’s about to enter XL-

HC: 😑

Thus, Hualian end up closing HC’s bedroom door every time they need alone time. Sometimes, they put on a playlist to block out E’Ming’s tantrum.

After they’re done. XL goes to let E’Ming in. But before she enters, her nose scrunches up.

She sniffs a couple times. Then glares at HC.

And sprints away.

***

Miraculously, XL has a sixth sense in catching any item E’Ming decides to sweep off the counter.

It’s their thing because E’Ming always tries to be unpredictable but somehow XL IS ALWAYS THERE!? HE’S ALWAYS READY??

IS HE STALKING HER???

XL, catching all the mail E’Ming flung off in succession: “aiya, stop! you know it‘s useless. i’ll just keep catching everything you drop.”

E’Ming: [annoyed] “mrreow!!”

XL: “keep dreaming, kitten” :)

E’Ming: [jumps off counter and retreats to HC’s bedroom]

HC, watching from the side, starstruck: “I think I just fell deeper in love with you, Gege.”

***

No matter what HC claims, he still loves and cares for E’Ming immensely. He actually spoils her to bits by buying her the tastiest food packed with nutrition and the most addicting catnip toys that she could play with for hours.

HC is also in the process of installing high ledges on the wall to create an elevated cat jungle for E’Ming to play on. When he mentions this to XL for the first time, XL raises an eyebrow and smiles, amused.

XL: “she has you wrapped around her sassy little tail, doesn’t she?”

HC, in realization: 🫠

***

When Hualian decide to move in together, XL brings his pet snake, Ruoye, to HC’s apartment.

E’Ming’s fur poofs up in defense when she first spots the long, pale creature behind the glass tank. When Ruoye’s tongue flicks out, E’Ming books it out of the living room.

Absolutely terrifying, she concludes.

But as the months pass by, E’Ming comes to accept this foreign thing must stay. It doesn’t stop her from staring at Ruoye for long periods of time, or from trying to intimidate the snake with a front-row-seat to her wrestling a stuffed animal frog WWE-style.

But they manage to get along. Eventually, it will be safe enough that XL can take Ruoye out and hang her on his neck while he completes chores and E’Ming will insistently tag along.

Plus, all the dead mice that E’Ming proudly drops at HC’s feet can contribute towards Ruoye’s food source.

***

XL’s moving in also means a boost in social events HC is a part of. Not that he minds too much because most of the time it’s people both he and XL are familiar with.

If E’Ming can be a total brat to the one who puts a roof over her head and food in her bowl, then she can be satan’s literal spawn to humans in every other category. (Excluding XL, of course.)

Cue HC subjecting his devil cat to certain somebodies during their Chinese New Year dinner.

E’Ming actually doesn’t mind HX. For years, HX looked after her when HC was away, and she quite likes HX’s scent for some reason…fishy.

But HX, in his all black attire, steers clear from the black furball who will bite him if he doesn’t feed her the special treats he usually has and currently doesn’t.

MQ and E’Ming have glaring contests. Every time. E’Ming looks like she’s preparing to attack MQ’s leg? Go on, he seethes with his eyes. I dare you.

E’Ming stalks away with her chin tipped up.

MQ is also the only one who can stop E’Ming from pushing things off the counter with one tongue-click.

However, no matter how hard MQ tries to prevent it, E’Ming always squeezes her way in to watch him go to the bathroom.

FX high-key really wants to pet E’Ming but he doesn’t stand a chance.

MQ to FX: “you know, it doesn’t help that you have dogs”

FX: “s-shut up”

E’Ming walking by…

FX: “hiiii, hellooo sweet thing!”

E’Ming: 👁👁

FX: “…pspspsp-“

E’Ming hisses, then trots away.

Right into YY’s arms.

Because for some reason, E’Ming LOVES YY. She always greets him at the front door with a soft “mrrrp??” and then rub her cheek on his legs until he picks her up.

YY holds her like a baby, rocking slightly. E’Ming immediately begins purring loudly, slowly closing her eyes.

HC: “you know you’re stuck with her for awhile now?”

YY: “yeah” *heads to the chair in the corner*

If you listen closely, you can hear FX sobbing in the background.

***

w/ @no-one-says-hi

《2》

[smallgodseries]

[image description: A stylized 50’s style illustration of a black cat with huge golden eyes sitting atop the world in a bubble-helmet. Teeny flying saucers float in the starry purple space background. Text reads, “133, Nightfall ~ The Small God of World Domination”]

• • • • •

We’re not sure what the cats were thinking when they domesticated humans.  Oh, sure, primates are useful, with their clever little primate hands that can do useful primate things, like building warm houses to keep the rain out, and making factories to produce cat toys, and opening cans of tuna.  Tuna.  That alone justifies keeping at least half the species around.

The other half, though…cat-kickers.  Dog-lovers.  All-around bastards who don’t think anything of tying their own children in a sack and throwing them in the river, much less ours.  So why do we have them?  Couldn’t our ancestors have done a better job of cultivating their servant species?  You’d think they would have tried harder to make a better future for us.  You’d think they would have cared.

At least our gods are amazing.  Perfect in every conceivable way, really.  Sleek of fur and swift of claw and sharp and bright of eye.  They’ll stalk and kill the gods of the lesser, until the heavens belong entirely to them.  The hells, too.  Anything you can imagine, they’ll have it for their own, and they’ll share it with us, for we have been faithful, for we are forever beloved.

And the greatest of them all is Nightfall, in whose shining green eyes is reflected the future, in whose sleek black sides we can see our absolute dominion over all.  She will guide us to the promised land of catnip and chicken, where every lap is open and every hand is kind.

Oh, oh, you dear sweet kitten.  We told you she was the small god of world domination.

We never said that it was going to be this one.

Let the poor, half-domesticated humans keep the world they’ve spoilt.  We’ll have a better one for our own, and we’ll never look back again.

Meow.

• • • • •

Join Lee Moyer (Icon) and Seanan McGuire (Story) Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for a guide to the many small deities who manage our modern world:

Tumblr: https://smallgodseries.tumblr.com

Twitter: https://twitter.com/smallgodseries

Instagram: https://instagram.com/smallgodseries/

Homepage: http://smallgodseries.com

[harriertail]

Also, if you think about Riverclan's lies they used to cover their own ass, and how the Skyclan medicine cat found that huge pile of dried catnip in Mothwing's den, to Tigerheartstar it sounds like they let Mistystar and Reedwhisker suffer and die (maybe multiple times for Mistystar) to Greencough when they had catnip right there and they didn't use it. Not defending him, but that's kind of concerning information.

Everyone has shifty motives and its great. I hope the Erins can keep it up because no one is really right or wrong, RiverClan is right to want to be left alone but they also should have known they had the medicine and helped, thats the moral thing to do; ShadowClan is right to be pissed RiverClan had the medicine and also lied about their leader, but is invasion and annexation ever morally justified? Frostpaw is a literal child holding up her Clan rn. Mothwing could be getting revenge on Tigerheartstar for ? but she also could have just made a mistake and forgot while grieving. Someone should probs step in to mediate ShadowClan vs RiverClan.