#let's all pray that tumblr doesn't fuck this one up

[lixies-favorite-cookie]

laughter like honey dribbles ◦ l.f

-an inexperienced Felix tries to impress you by forcing his voice deeper. What do you do when it cracks mid-through?

Paring◦ Lee Felix x Fem!Reader

Words◦ 1123

Genre ◦ The fluffiest smut you'll ever read, awkward sexual situations, realistic sex where life isn't all butterflies, orgasms, and rainbows.

Warnings ◦ Reader is described as having a vagina, laughter during sex, Felix being a big baby, embarrassment (what's new), ruined orgasm ig? Ngl i feel like half of this is just a bunch of me yapping and terrible punctuation (if you find any errors PLEASE let me know, thank you).

A/N ◦ This was the very first thing I've ever posted on my tumblr literally ever and so I'm going to be reuploading all of my stuff back onto this account 😃 so why not start off here

~CookieCreates🍪

You can feel him all around you, chest to chest, skin to skin, heart to heart. Your bodies melded together flawlessly, as though you were molded to fit into each other's arms, and, well, each others…

He pumps in and out of you ruthlessly, perfectly tipping you closer and closer to the edge.

“Please,” you whimper, wrapping your legs around his rutting hips, wanting him closer, harder, deeper,

Fuck.

“What do you want, baby?” He slams his hips harder into yours, prodding all the perfect places. You choke, a rush of pleasure vibrating through your bones. “Use your words.” He pants, nibbling on the soft skin of your neck, his voice deep and low, the seductive sultry tilt sends shivers up your spine and tingles to your core. 

“Say something, anything, your voice drives me crazy,” you whine, throwing your head back in bliss. A shrill moan rips from the back of your throat as you feel your orgasm quickly approaching, electric hands reaching out to you. You brush the tips of its fingers; trailing rings of fire seem to be tickling your skin, raging beneath your bones. 

So close.

So close.

So close.

You reach, all you need is,

“Good girl.” Felix doesn't know why he did it, forced his voice lower, deeper. At the time when ecstasy was rushing through his veins, it didn't seem like such a bad idea, until he went so deep it cracked.

He wants nothing more than for the earth to crack open and swallow him whole.

He stops.

You stop.

The world stops for a moment, and all you can see are his big, brown eyes blown wide with shock. The room is completely silent; the only thing being heard is the rough pounding of your hearts and the hard blinking of your eyes which seems like all you guys are able to do. You stay like that forever. Watching. Waiting. For one of you to take one for the team and cut through the growing tension in the room. You curl your lips into your teeth, breaking the awkward stand-off on whose either going to laugh their ass off or pretend that nothing happened and continue to fuck, but with your orgasm long forgotten and the previous raging heat of the room now dwindling to nothing more than a few flickering embers, the laughter that bubbles up in your throat is beginning to be too hard to contain.

Heat floods his cheeks as he blinks, still in this weird form of fight or flight mode. His muscles tense beneath your traveling fingertips, overcome with the humiliation that burns through his chest, and figuring no matter how much he's praying for the earth to swallow him up, Mother Nature is not coming to save him, so he shoves his face into the crook of your neck, hiding from your amused stare instead. 

“Baby,” you chuckle softly, sympathetically, the sound reminding him somewhat of delicate strings of honey that float through the air. Even with the regret coursing through his veins, the sound sticks to parts of his brain that only you are allowed to occupy, so basically, all of it.

He could sum up his life with you in one simple sentence: cotton candy kisses and laughter like honey dribbles. He groans, digging his face deeper into the soft skin of your neck, the same neck that's littered with the love bites he bestowed not even moments earlier.

Oh, how the world changes. 

You can't help the spree of giggles that spill from your mouth.

“Can you come out now, please?”

"No, I'm good. I think I'm going to live here, die here, eat here, sleep here. You might as well get comfortable, baby, cause I'm staying here for the rest of my life!” He says erratically, digging his face deeper into your skin.

“My dramatic baby,” you coo, running your fingers through his hair, still damp with sweat. Time seems to trickle by as soft bouts of breathing fill the air. The heat of his cheeks burns into your neck as you attempt to coddle him out of the embarrassed home he's made in your body.

"S'embarrassing,” he mumbles, voice muddled by the depth in which he has burrowed into your flesh.

“What was that, baby? I couldn't hear you from the home you've made in my neck.” You tease, a playful smirk dancing on your lips. He lifts his head, shooting you an equally playful but unamused glare. You have to push back the laughter that threatens to leave your lips as you take in his red cheeks and shy eyes. He looks so adorable and yet so sexy at the same time. You don't know if you want to jump his bones or bake him a batch of cookies. The best part is that you know you're going to be able to do both. You lift your eyebrows, sending him a look that states, "You have to admit that really was funny," which he reciprocates with a bashful smile, not quite meeting your eyes, giving you a look back that states, "I know it was funny, but right now I'm too embarrassed to say that currently."

That's what you loved about your relationship with Felix—you didn't always have to communicate with words. Your hearts did the talking for you.

“Come on,” you giggle, “you have to admit it was kind of funny.” He rolls his eyes, a wide smile creeping onto his face. "Yeah, I guess it was kind of funny.” 

You snicker, “Thank God, cause the laughter wasn't going to hold itself in for very long.” 

"Ugg, I hate you.” His words were as soft as silk, holding not even a centimeter of malice. He buries himself back into the permanent place he's made his home. 

“But I love you.” You whisper, your lips grazing the crown of his head, soft hairs tickling your chin.

You loved Felix, and he loved you, and even though the mood was ruined and hope for an orgasm was gone, you wouldn't trade it for the world. How could you when he was exactly that. Your world. 

“Okay, as much as I hate to say this, you can't live inside of me forever; my pH levels have to be screaming right now.”

When you were a girl and the coughs started coming, your mother used to give you honey in a spoon and a tickle to the stomach, telling you that laughter was the best medicine, but mixed with the slick amber liquid, your laughter would always sound like honey dribbles, the perfect cure, but with Felix, you never had to worry about being sick because laughter was all the two of you ever spoke.

©CookieCreates (posted: June, 2nd 2024) All rights reserved. Do not translate, copy, or claim my works as yours! I only post on this platform so if any of my works are elsewhere, report and notify me immediately.

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

READ 70 PAGES OF THE GOOD OMENS BOOK WITH WHICH I HAVE HOMOEROTIC TENSION AS WE KNOW

WE ALL KNOW ABOUT THE HOMOEROTIC RIVALRY BETWEEN ME AND MY COPY OF THE GOOD OMENS BOOK. WE KNOW. IT STARES AT ME, I STARE BACK, IT DARES ME TO READ IT AND FALL IN LOVE WITH CROWLEY MORE, I REFUSE. WE PUT THE UST IN LUST ETC.

BUT TODAY/YESTERDAY (RIP SLEEP SCHEDULE) SINCE I WASNT ON TUMBLR, I READ TILL PAGE 70 OF THE BOOK (TILL THE PART CALLED WEDNESDAY) AND GOD FUCKING DAMN. I READ IT LISTENING TO AN AZIRAPHALE BOOKSHOP AMBIENCE AND WITH CHOPIN PLAYING AND CANDLES LIT. ANYWAY. THINGS THAT HAVE STUCK OUT TO ME:

Crowley. Just everything about Crowley. God I love him. I fucking love him. This is why I avoid reading the book. I'm such a slut for Crowley. It's manageable on the show when I know it's an actor. But WORDS CROWLEY? WORDS CROWLEY IS REAL. I AM SO IN LOVE.

Aziraphale has perfectly manicured hands. I'm pretty sure this has been mentioned three times in the first 70 pages. Three times at minimum. I forget how twink he is in the show (idk how) but man the book does NOT let you forget and I love that.

Crowley absent-mindedly sank a duck. Aziraphale called him my dear (fanfic authors everywhere: write that down write that motherfucking shit down it's better than porn). Crowley un-sunk the duck. The duck was cross.

CROWLEY DID I MENTIONED CROWLEY OH MY BABY FANCIED THE JAMES BOND DECALS HE WANTED TO LISTEN TO VIVALDI COZ THEY WERE SO STRESSED AFTER RECEIVING THE ANTICHRIST THEY LOVE GOLDEN GIRLS (I LOOKED IT UP AND OH CROWLEY) THEY DRANK FOR A WEEK AFTER SEEING THE SPANISH INQUISITION THEY OMG.

THE DRUNK SCENE. I FINALLY UNDERSTOOD THE DOLPHINS CONVERSATION. OMG THESE TWO FUCKING FOOLS I ADORE THEM.

Crowley IN THAT SCENE AND AZIRAPHALE IN THAT SCENE HOLY SHIT. CROWLEY JUST LISTING OFF ALL THE THINGS SHE KNOWS AZIRAPHALE LOVES.

AND OMG. The CONVOLUTED FUCKING METAPHOR CROWLEY COMES UP WITH INVOLVING A LITTLE BIRD FLYING TO THE ENDS OF THE UNIVERSE AND PECKING A MOUNTAIN AND COMING BACK AND DOING IT ON LOOP. FOR WHAT? JUST TO SAY THAT WHEN THE MOUNTAIN WAS GONE, HEAVEN WOULD STILL BE PLAYING THE SOUND OF MUSIC.

As usual just like me Crowley shot himself in the foot with that metaphor. Because AZIRAPHALE, THE LEGEND, STARTS SAYING THE BIRD MUST BE IMMORTAL FOR THAT, AND THEN SAYS NO ACTUALLY THE BIRD IS BEING CARRIED IN A SPACESHIP AND THE DESCENDANTS EMERGE FROM THE SPACESHIP and poor crowley is saying SO THE BIRD REACHES THE MOUNTAIN and azi excitedly says IN THE SPACESHIP and AAAAAAAAA-

Anyway right yes sorry what were we doing oh right the book.

Anathema is so adorable as a kid what a little brat holy shit I love her. I want to see all her homework written in Middle English. I want to know which teacher finally summoned the balls to correct it.

NEWT MON CHERI HE'S SO EXCITED ABOUT ONLY DESTROYING THE HOUSE'S POWER CIRCUIT WITH HIS EXPERIMENT. Because apparently last time he fucking caused a power outage in the whole block. Or county. We stan an optimist (no one talk to me about Crowley being an optimist I will go feral and rip your larynx out).

THE THIRD BABY DID NOT WIN PRIZES FOR TROPICAL FISH. THIS IS LIKE THE ENDING OF VILETTE WHEN CHARLOTTE BRONTE GOT GUILTTRIPPED BY HER DAD INTO WRITING IT AS AN OPEN ENDING BUT WE ALL KNOW IT'S A TRAGEDY FUCK ME.

CROWLEY THE PRAY THAT HE DOESN'T IT SOUNDS SO SUAVE IN THE SHOW BUT IN THE BOOK IT LITERALLY SAYS "AND FLEES". THE CHAOTIC ANXIOUS MOTHERFUCKER MAKES A RUN FOR IT.

AZIRAPHALE FUCKING GLOWERING AT CUSTOMERS AND SCARING THEM AWAY USING EVERY MEANS SHORT OF PHYSICAL VIOLENCE IM DEAD THAT LITTLE BASTARD PEAK CROSS INTROVERT ELDRITCH MONSTER ENERGY.

I CAN'T WAIT FOR ADAM TO ENTER (WELL AS A NOT BABY) AHAH.

I HOPE WARLOCK IS OKAY.

CROWLEY BEING DESCRIBED AS A YOUNG MAN DOES THINGS TO ME. AS DO THE DARK HAIR AND GOOD CHEEKBONES. DON'T EVEN TALK ABOUT DOING WEIRD THINGS WITH HIS TONGUE. I AM A SLUT FOR HER. IT'S TIMES LIKE THIS I REMEMBER WHY IM GREYACE AND NOT ENTIRELY ASEXUAL. IT'S CROWLEY.

I LOVE THE SUBTLE JOKES LIKE I DON'T EVEN GET SOME BUT THE DRY TONE IS HILARIOUS. LIKE HOW BOTH WARLOCK'S HEAVENLY AND HELLISH TUTORS READ FROM THE BOOK OF REVELATION. AND THE CUTTING COMMENTARY LIKE HOW THE DOWLINGS' SECRET AGENTS WERE TRAINED TO REACT TO WOMEN IN LONG ROBES. OR THE POLITICAL COMEDY WITH ALL THE CULTURAL ATTACHES AT ST JAMES. IT MAKES ME AMUSED EVEN THOUGH I HAVE NO CONTEXT. I WISH I UNDERSTOOD THEM MORE.

SORRY WHY AM I YELLING ABOUT THIS BEFORE 6 IN THE MORNING FUCK I FORGOT MY SLEEP MEDS NO WONDER IM STILL AWAKE AND HYPER ALSO CROWLEY ALSO AZI ALSO ADAM I HOPE MY LITTLE PLANTS MAKE IT.

WHEN IM DONE READING THE BOOK I WANNA REREAD IT OUT LOUD TO MY THREE LITTLE PLANTS TO MAKE THEM GROW HAPPY AND KNOW WHOM THEY WERE NAMED AFTER.

[snakeoilpictures]

The problem with pro-shippers: NSFW child content

Silence is golden but that only pertains to certain cases. The subject of pro-ship vs anti-ship has been a huge manner of debate in fandoms, primarily A03 and A03's subreddit and tumblr community. If you admit to being anti-ship, you're suddenly exiled and considered a pariah to the community and a promoter of cancel culture.

"Let people enjoy things!" "It's not real, it's fictional!" "These characters and actors are our toys to play with" "Disregard all haters, they're the monsters"

Only goes so far in some subjects. There is a fine line drawn when the content involves CSEA that's not told with a negative connotation.

However, pro-shippers do not like being told the difference.

The difference between a negative narrative and a romanticizing narrative. (ie: we as readers and the author know that pedophilia and child pornography is bad. Versus: we as readers and the author enjoy fictional pornography when it involves children and we enjoy writing 10 year olds having sex with other 10 year olds or a 10 year old calling a 40 year old man "daddy" during NSFW acts).

That the characters being fictionalized completely disregards all notions that the author and readers enjoy reading about children in NSFW content. Because it's "fictional".

That if you like watching a cannibal on TV and the fact that you may enjoy a show about a cannibal, it doesn't make you a cannibal because it's fiction. This argument is used on the daily for pro-shippers.

4. Because no children are actually harmed. That may be, but the reader and author are still enjoying content that involves the images of children in NSFW scenarios.

The fact of the matter is that it doesn't matter if the children are fictionalized or not, but no pro-shipper is going to agree because the characters in themselves are considered "toys" they can play with. (Don't get me started on how wrong the term of "toy" sounds in regards to children, fictional or not.)

The true facts here are that the reader and author are still putting a child's face onto a character involved in NSFW content. That's all it is. Picturing a child's prepubescent body parts as a character and finding that attractive enough to write about in an NSFW fashion. Again, pro-ship will disagree and become hostile.

But why is NSFW fictional child pornography morally wrong when writing fictionalized incest pornography is not?

Because the fictionalized incest pornography does not involve actual siblings or family members. One may just like the characters together regardless of blood. It doesn't mean that the author or reader is attracted to their real life sibling or wishes to put two real life siblings together in NSFW scenarios like Liam and Chris Hemsworth and because child pornography is CSEA. A child cannot consent. Even fantasizing about a fictional child in rape scenarios is beyond levels of fucked up.

"But fictionalized incest isn't real so fictionalized child pornography isn't real"

The biggest difference is that the reader and writer aren't finding the real life prospect of incest attractive, but they are finding CSEA content an attractive scenario.

But god forbid you raise your voice against this, and you'll be crucified.

It. Doesn't. Matter. That. They're. Not. Real.

You are still attracted to the images of child characters.

But wait, no actual children were harmed?! "It's just an instrusive thought" "I can safely look at CSEA in a safe environment where I don't hurt anyone" No. Get help. Get therapy. Harm reduction is not thr same when it comes to non consenting minors and when it comes to a user getting off on the idea of children. Get help. There is no lesser evil here. These thoughts are not okay.

Come @ me. I'm not scared. Not as scared as some pro-shippers should be once their search history is discovered. (For the record, I pray you do not have this kind of content on your person. However if you truly believe CSEA is okay if no one is physically harmed by you then by all means, tell your therapist about it)

#end rant

[gareleia]

THE KNITTING SAGA CONTINUES

update: my co-writer friend FINALLY got a tumblr account, so I can tag them now!!

previously: part 1

next: part 3 part 4 part 5

a continuation because I have no impulse control and am in dire need of more Aeolus content

first of all, let's establish one thing - and I think we can all agree on that - Aeolus loves to fuck with people. they are a benevolent(-ish?) trickster deity, and they revel in harmless pranks

as a consequence, they are on pretty good terms with Hermes. while Hermes doesn't care much for the 'small fry' and doesn't pay that much attention to the wind god most of the time, Aeolus has their winions follow the messenger god religiously (pun intended), because? where Hermes goes, shenanigans always follow.

so when they get the tea that he's apparently hanging out on that one random Greek island, playing nanny? oh, they know it's gotta be good. so naturally, they go to check it out.

well, turns out that Athena is also there, and both of them are sooo bad with babies, it's hilarious

Athena, holding baby!Telemachus: Ehhh, shouldn't it be eating more meat? it's body is so weak, it can't even hold a spear! Hermes, exasperated: oh my me, 'thena, that's not how humans work!! babies eat liquids first!! how can you not know that!! here you go, champ, drink some wine!! Aeolus, hiding in the leaves: holy shit these guys are dumb

so now they can't just leave Telemachus alone with Athena and Hermes! they might not be an expert on child rearing, but surely they can do better than those two dorks! and the baby is adorable.

so they decide to stick around. just for a little bit. a week tops.

fast forward a few years, and they have been raising the prince of Ithaca

Aeolus: *shocked pikachu face*

and Aeolus is the much needed chaotic good influence to Hermes' chaotic neutral and Athena's lawful neutral.

the thing is, Aeolus is really good at hiding. so good, in fact, that no one but Telemachus had even realized they are here. everyone else just thinks that the prince has an invisible friend which, well… they're not wrong?.. and it's not like other kids are exactly lining up to be his friends anyway, cause everyone thinks he's weird (or their parents don't want to catch the attention of the suitors)

and the gods think that it's because they hang around too much and Telemachus can't make friends because of them. so maybe they try to spend less time in Ithaca, for his own good. which only makes things worse, because now the boy is upset, and Aeolus and winions have to try extra hard to cheer him up, which pisses them off.

Athena & Hermes: oh, goodness us, we shall try not to interfere too much with the mortal affairs, so that the young prince grows up healthy and happy ¯_(ツ)_/¯ Telemachus: (T⌓T) Aeolus: ヾ( ･`⌓´･)ﾉﾞ

and then they have to subtle bully the two dumb fucks to come back.

on a less serious note, Aeolus also has a sweet tooth, especially for marshmallows (idgaf there weren't any marshmallows in Mycenaean Greece, they're a god. they can make all the damn marshmallows they want)

and of course, since they are sooo generous, they always share with Telemachus.

what they don't know(?) is that winions, who all get their own treats, also collectively share them with the baby, because they are secretly evil adorable little freaks.

which results in a very hyper prince sugar rushing seemingly out of nowhere.

Telemachus, running all around the palace and crackling madly: I AM SPEED- Penelope, unimpressed: and who, pray tell, had given my son sweets right before dinner? Athena, equally unimpressed: yes, I would also like to know. Hermes, sweating nervously: heyyyy, why are you all looking at me like that???? ( ಠ‿ಠ ) Aeolus, from behind a tree, unseen by anyone: (｡•̀U-)┘

Hermes always gets blamed.

It's the only time he doesn't do the thing

and he's seething, because nobody believes him.

[starmergeddon]

To someone who doesn't live in the UK and has only a very basic understanding of the different parties involved, pray could you provide a very brief rub-down of the election situation? Also a side question, where exactly did Rishi Sunak and the Tories in general fuck up? I've been getting a lot of British politics posts on my dash and I was curious. You seem like a reliable fellow to ask :)

Btw you really don't have to answer this ask if you don't want to or if it's too much work. In that case, could you point me in the right direction for some online resources I can refer to? Thank ye very much, cheers!

for context, I recieved this ask the day after the election, and somehow managed to miss it for 3 weeks. oops.

if you don't know how British elections work, here are three youtube videos from Jay Foreman which I recommend: how elections work, how elections don't work, and the bit that isn't elected at all

very long post under the cut...

the british political parties

like the US, the UK is a two-party state. unlike the US, the UK has more than two relevant political parties. here they are, in order of seats won this year:

Labour Party (411 (63.2%) seats, with 33.7% of votes)

won this year's General Election.

led by kid starver, queer harmer Keir Starmer, namesake of this blog.

was the Big Left-Wing Party. has recently become the Big Party which Doesn't Stand for Anything, Really, Except for Winning Elections and Hurting Transgender People, due to Starmer's leadership.

oddly patriotic. wants to establish "Great British Railways" and "Great British Energy". Nobody really knows yet what they mean by this.

former leader Ed Miliband is the man in my pfp, pictured failing to eat a bacon sandwich. Some speculate that this photo was the reason he lost the election in 2015.

Conservative "Tory" Party (121 (18.6%) seats, with 23.7% of votes)

tonight's Big Loser.

led by fishy, dishy Rishi Sunak, but not for long, because they're electing a new leader on Halloween.

was the Big Right-Wing Party. is still the Big Right-Wing Party, but is now also an Embarrassment.

they were in power for 14 years until this election.

Directly responsible for this country's decline over the past... 14 years.

their colour is more of a dark blue, but Tumblr doesn't let me do that.

Liberal Democrat Party (72 (11.1%) seats, with 12.2% of votes)

returned to its rightful place as the Third Party.

led by Sir Ed Davey, who spent the election campaign bungee jumping, playing Jenga, and paddleboarding.

is the Centrist Party that Nobody Really Cares About.

somehow is more left-wing than Labour.

Scottish National Party (SNP) (9 (1.4%) seats, with 2.5% of votes)

tonight's Medium-Sized Loser.

led by John Swinney, who was also their leader like 20 years ago.

unsurprisingly, is the Scottish Independence Party. is also more left-wing than Labour.

their colour is yellow, but Tumblr doesn't let me do that.

Reform UK Ltd. (5 (0.8)% seats, with 14.3% of votes)

Fascist Cunts.

led by Nigel Farage.

not actually a political party, for some reason.

enough said. (for now)

Green Party (4 (0.6%) seats, with 6.7% of votes)

the one I voted for.

co-led by Carla Denyer and Adrian Ramsey.

the Actually Left-Wing Party. Their slogan is "real hope, real change" which sums it up.

Plaid Cymru (4 (0.6%) seats, with 0.7% of votes)

the SNP, but Welsh. (it's pronounced "Plad Cumry")

led by Rhun ap Iorweth. (pronounced "Rune app You're weth")

their colour is dark green, but Tumblr doesn't let me do that.

None of these parties run for election in Northern Ireland, which is part of the UK, but not part of Great Britain. NI is an entirely different situation which I don't know about.

so what actually Happened? Now that the scene is set, I'll go through the events that transpired, from the conservative landslide in 2019 to the conservative demise in 2024.

2019

the Conservatives don't have enough MPs who want to vote for their Brexit plan, so they call a snap general election. in the UK, our elections aren't at regular intervals. ONLY the Prime Minister decides when they happen, within a 5 year limit. this is important later...!

they win a massive landslide victory, with Boris Johnson as their PM. the SNP wins 48 out of 59 seats in Scotland.

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn (affectionately known as Jezza) resigns, as does LibDem leader Jo Swinson.

2020

Keir Starmer takes over as Labour leader, and is immediately very boring. Labour gets more unpopular.

Jezza is kicked out of the Labour party, as are many of his supporters, on false allegations of antisemitism.

Boris finally "gets Brexit done" (this was his slogan.) The Tories get more popular. The Brexit Party changes its name to Reform UK, but they're still considered right-wing extremists

COVID happens. Everyone rallies round the flag. The Tories get more popular.

Boris gets COVID and nearly dies.

top conservative politicians hold parties in Downing Street, breaking their own lockdown rules, but shhhh! nobody knows about that yet! these keep happening until April 2021

The NHS begins to collapse a bit more than it already had, due to Conservative underfunding. The Tories get less popular.

Chancellor Rishi Sunak announces a program giving people discounts to eat out in restaurants. COVID cases spike. The Tories get less popular.

It's revealed that one of the top Tories, Dominic Cummings, broke lockdown rules by visiting family. The Tories get less popular.

End of year - Tories and Labour tied in the polls.

2021

the Queen's husband dies. She goes to his funeral, socially-distanced, alone. on the same day, more Downing Street parties are held.

not much else happens?? until December, when

people start to find out that the Tories were breaking their own rules by partying in Downing Street. Immediately, the Labour Party gains a 7% lead in the polls.

2022 - shit hits the fan

people are MAD about the lockdown parties. it's named Partygate and the police start to investigate.

Russia invades Ukraine. Boris tries to distract everyone by supporting Zelenskyy.

the police conclude their investigation. Boris Johnson becomes the first Prime Minister to have officially broken the law. as a firm punishment, he is fined.... £50. (so are Rishi Sunak, and lots of others.)

Everything gets expensive. Many people are now choosing between eating and heating their home.

Just after this happens, it's revealed that Johnson also gave promotions to a Tory who he knew had committed sexual assault. His cabinet revolts. He is forced to resign as Conservative Party leader. But because he is Prime Minister, he's the only one who can call an election, and he simply chooses not to! because he knows he'd lose!

The new Prime Minister is chosen not by the people, but by the Conservative Party members. people hate this.

Liz Truss beats Rishi Sunak in the final contest. She becomes Prime Minister.

The Queen dies.

Liz Truss crashes the economy. All hell breaks loose. The Labour Party now have a 25% lead in the polls.

The Daily Star starts a YouTube livestream - will Liz Truss leave office before this lettuce expires?

Liz Truss loses control of her MPs. She, too, is forced to resign, just 40 days after becoming PM! Because she doesn't have to call an election, she doesn't.

The lettuce won.

ONCE AGAIN it is up to the Conservative Party leadership to choose a Prime Minister... except nobody wants to be Prime Minister. Rishi Sunak becomes Prime Minister without being elected by ANYBODY

2023

not much extra happens, for a while. people are just sick and tired of the Tories

They decide it's a good idea to try and deport asylum seekers to Rwanda, because immigration is "too high".

Nicola Sturgeon gets bored of being a politician and resigns as SNP leader. Without a clear successor, the SNP destroys itself finding a new leader.

Nicola Sturgeon is also arrested on suspicion of having funnelled money out of the SNP to herself before she resigned! (she's cleared of suspicion, but the public gain a conception of the SNP being corrupt.)

Shit happens in Gaza. The Tories back Israel. Labour, having shifted massively to the right, also back Israel. People become unhappy with both of them, and still are today.

2024

A general election has to happen this year. The Tories are still 20% behind in the polls.

It's announced that the UK entered a small recession at the end of 2023.

Four asylum seekers are sent to Rwanda. They spent £700,000,000 on this.

Rishi constantly dodges questions about when the general election will be, simply saying it will come "in the second half" of the year. Most people think he means autumn.

He did not mean autumn. He calls an election for 4 July, but forgets to bring an umbrella in the process, and gets rained on.

Nigel Farage immediately takes control of Reform UK. (He's allowed to do that because it's technically a company, and as owner of said company he can do what he wants)

Reform UK surges in popularity, reaching 17% in the polls, just behind the Conservatives at 21%

Rishi leaves a D-day event halfway through to give an interview with a TV broadcaster, in which the multimillionaire claimed his childhood was hard because he didn't have Sky TV.

The Conservatives decide to cure their election woes by sending all 18-year-olds to National Service. (ie. military)

It's also revealed that many top Tories placed bets on the election being held on 4 July.

The Conservative Party loses voters to Labour on their left, and to Reform on their right.

election result analysis

where did it go wrong for the Tories? uh, everywhere.

where did it go right for Labour, though? depends who you ask...

voters decisively rejected the Conservatives, choosing either Reform, Labour, or LibDem instead.

however, they weren't enthusiastic about Labour instead. many Labour wins came about as a result of Reform splitting the right-wing vote in half.

polling suggests most people who voted Labour did so to remove the Tories from power.

Fewer people voted for Labour this year than in 2019, but they doubled their seats in Parliament. Our voting system is fucked.

The Green Party quadrupled its seat share. They have won in every seat they have targeted.

Five leftist independent MPs beat Labour in what were "safe" constituencies. One of them was Jeremy Corbyn!! What this shows is that people don't really like Labour, or that people really don't like Labour. They want something better.

The SNP is nearly wiped out in Scotland, despite getting 30% of the Scottish vote. Labour wins most seats in Scotland with 35% of the Scottish vote.

The "Party of Women" (which is literally just TERFs) got fewer votes than the Monster Raving Loony Party. Lmao.

19 people voted for Elmo in Keir Starmer's constituency.

More people voted for the Conservatives and Reform UK combined than they did for Labour. If Labour doesn't get its shit together, we could be in trouble.

what's happened since the election?

7 Labour MPs have already been kicked out of the party for voting to adopt measures to lift 1.6 million children out of poverty

pressure from Greens and independents led to Labour accepting the ICC's arrest warrant for Netanyahu and stopping some arms sales to Israel's genocide.

what happens next?

the Tories choose a new leader on Halloween. other than that? fuck knows lmao. what the 2019-2024 parliament tells us is that anything can happen. as mentioned before, we don't even know when the next election is.

where exactly did Rishi Sunak and the Tories in general fuck up?

you tell me

i also realise just now, after typing all that out, that you asked for a "very brief rub-down" of what happened............. yeah my bad

[0wl3tt3]

Reflection on my practice (for future me)

Hello, so I wanted to do write what has been my practice so far for future me to read and reflect, I discover a lot for myself, so this might be long so please sit and relax.

Catholicism

I grew up Roman Catholic for most of my life, living and breathing on those values, going to Catholic school and going to church but it doesn't really have an affect for me, I didn't feel connected to Catholicism, so I was semi atheist (I didn't know that Agnostic exist) for most of my early teenage years until I was in grade 10, where I was kinda chilling in class, I wasn't interested with the subject so I just pulled out my phone and thought it would be fun to search on tumblr about witchcraft and it really interested me. Everything about it looked fun and maybe I wanted to dipped my toes in the water. Later on I created an account specifically for that! I enjoyed it as a newbie liking the vibes and looked to find Paganism

Kemeticism

Anyone who followed 15-16 year old me will remember I was a Kemetic pagan, I worshipped Anubis and Ra (Along with Heru-Sa-Aset) but I was close to Anubis, I prayed to him after my dog died which did started my path to paganism where I now just denounce myself silently as a Catholic. I prayed and gave him offerings that I have access to and just let him guide me to cope. I started being open to my practice to my friends as well which they all really support! I never said anything to my family knowing what they believe was that I'm just catholic.

I really do thank Anubis and the gods I did pray for those hardships of my own mistakes and leading me to comfort even when I'm arrogant. It inspired me to admire history more that I ever did, I wanted to read more about old religions, I wanted to just eat every single information I can find tiring to be the best version of what I should do and value.

Hellenism and Athena

I've already told this but I wasn't Kemetic pagan anymore now, I adored Anubis but it felt like my time of mourning had passed and it felt like I might have to part my ways with Kemeticism. Its a beautiful religion and the people there are lovely! but I just don't follow it as a follower anymore and I was called to Hellenism.

I wasn't gonna lie and say Hellenism didn't intimidate me, it did, I knew to never take the myths literally for me to not act dumb but there were a lot of things I had to learn now that I wasn't following Kemeticism. I wasn't sure who to look, well, for a bit until I settled with Athena which makes sense.

Listen, I am a girl that loved the greek monsters, dragons, drawing, and war history, of course I'm gonna pray to Athena!

I felt like she was the goddess for me and later became the kinda the only goddess I prayed for when it comes to tests and being strong. Sometimes I don't do prayers because of school and my own laziness, I'm happy that she's patient with me and a tarot reading by a friend, where I asked "What's Athena thinking about me? I haven't done much for her..." "Talk to me more! and stop procrastinating!"

Is just... I STILL THINK ABOUT IT LIKE OH SWEET GODDESS THANK YOU BUT ALSO DON'T CALL ME OUT😭😭😭😭/j

But I really do thank her for that, it's just so sweet for me to know she is around even when I'm not always acknowledging her.

Now and future

I think one, buy a fucking tarot deck for myself and just talk more, sometimes when no one is around I just talk out of no where to her which I see as my baby steps to coming back since last and the early months I was pretty dry on my worship and practice. This summer I hope I can read history books and just talk about it to her, start doing divination and do something about that rain water from one year ago lmao.

I think this year will be witchy and pagan for me! I'm excited for shenanigans to ensue with my irl witch friends!

And I will say it again, thank you to the deities I worshipped before and now for guiding me to where I am now, no matter how chaotic it is, you're there for me.

So for future me, let's do this!!!!!

[marksbear]

Oh am sorry though my tumblr didn't let me. And thanks as always it's a great read and enjoyed your work and better after a day. But if you dont mind can I request Steven who had a sexual dream and wakes up with a boner and then reader wakes up cuz he can feel Steven trying to leave his arms. Reader asks what happened and steven trys not to tell him and ask him to fuck him. But reader keeps asking and then Steven said it was because a dream. Reader is shocked and asks for the details. While Steven tells him reader starts to tease him without giving what he wants and steven has to beg reader for anything to make him cum.-🐻‍❄️

Hey! I don't mind at all! I love to write any requests you ask! And I hope you like it 🐻‍❄! - Mark

STEVEN GRANT X DOM MALE READER

Y/n and Steven kiss each other's open mouth tongue exploring each other's mouth as Y/n thrust his cock deep into Steven's prostate making him moan in his mouth. Y/n thrust are slow but rough using Steven like if he was a toy.

Steven is filled with cum. Loads of the cum overflowing out of his hole getting onto the sheets. Y/n takes both of Steven writs with both of his hands pining him on the bed as he fucks him slowly.

Y/n pulls away from the makeout and licks Steven's jaw and cheek as he rolls his hips back and forth. The two have been at it for hours Y/n having multiple orgasms but Steven hasn't even had one yet.

It was Steven's punishment for being a bad boy. Even though it was a punishment he felt so good and in pure bliss from his boyfriend using him like he was just some whore on the street. Y/n begins to pick up his pace pulling his cock out all the way out until it reaches the tip before slamming it back in Steven's abused hole. Steven cries and squirms under his boyfriend begging to let him cum. Y/n doesn't listen and licks Steven's lips shoving his tongue into his mouth kissing him deeply with full of passion. Steven wraps his legs around Y/n waist giving him more access to his whole without trouble. Y/n lets go of Steven's bruised wrist and wraps his arms around Steven's like he is hugging him fucking his prostate repeatedly and with out mercy.

"Cum with me Steven! oH~fuck! I'm cumming stevey! Ahh cUmming!"

Steven wakes up with his body feeling all hot and fuzzy legs trembling with excitement. Looks at his hard cock and whines and tries to wiggle his way out of Y/n tight hold. Steven's head becomes embarrassment once he keeps getting pulled back to his boyfriend and his boyfriend sees his rock hard boner. Steven tries and tries to get out of Y/n tight hold but fails each time. "Stevey. What the hell are you trying to do." Y/n says sleepily beginning to wake up from his boyfriend fails to escape.

Steven freezes and prays that his boyfriend is just sleep talking but his prayers fail once his boyfriend sits up and turns his body around facing Steven. Y/n notices his boyfriend's nervous and embarrassed face. "Baby. What happened? What's the matter with you?" Y/n asks picking up Steven placing him on his own lap.

Steven covers his boner with his hands praying the darkness in the room can hide his hands and so Y/n won't notice his hard bulge. Steven squirms on Y/n thighs slowly moving his hips back and forth. "Y/n..can you fuck me? o-or touch me! please Y/n I-I need it. I've been your good boy!" Steven begs grinding onto Y/n.

"Want me to fuck you?~ But tell me why is your cock hard? What made you get so horny and worked up tonight." Y/n nibbles Steven ear moving his hands on Steven clothed cock rubbing him through his pants. "N-no. It's embarrassing..." Steven tries to beg him not wanting to tell him. "Well then I can't help you out with your problem." Y/n keeps questioning him as he rubs Stevens crotch sliding his hand down into his underwear touching his cock.

"I-it was a dream okay! now please j-just fuck me Y/nnn!" Steven blurts out Y/n smiles and pulls down his own underwear before pulling off Stevens. "Since you're so desperate I'm guessing you don't need no prep?But I do gotta say i'm a bit shocked to out your a wet dreamer I thought you were too innocent for something like that"

Y/n questions Steven quickly shakes his head no. Y/n picks up Steven and slowly slides his cock inside of Steven. The couple stay in that position until Steven gets used to it and about to ride it but gets stopped by Y/n hands on his hips holding him down. "But I gotta ask. Was it me who made your cock hard? Was the dream better than real life?" Steven hides his face in his hands before answering.

"O-of course it was you...And no. I like it better in real life." Steven answers shyly making Y/n comment "Atta boy. But cmon tell me more." Y/n pulls out Steven putting his boxers back on waiting for his story. "I-I thought you were g-gonna fuck me! I did what I was asked..." Steven Y/n out making Y/n laugh and cup his cheeks. "I lied baby~ I just stuck my dick in you for your cock don't go soft." Y/n smirks at him. "But please tell me the dream"

Steven tells him about the dream trying to ignore Y/n expressions and lewd comments. "So if I pin you on the bed like I did in the dream you'll cum?" Y/n asks teasing Steven. "I was licking you like a dog huh? Doesn't seem too bad to me. How about I lick you again but this time in different areas~"

All of Y/n comments make Steven weak and his cock leak precum. "Please Y/n... I'll do anything~ j-just make me cum please! i'll be your whore or a toy just please make me cum... I want you so bad Y/n.~ please just use me."

"Oh Anything... Really?

THE END!!

[ettawritesnstudies]

You look like a really happy and supportive person, do you have any tips about dealing with resentment esp. against other writers? It's something I'm noticing a lot in the community and other spaces I participate. Everybody treats it like it's righteous anger but it feels toxic. The moment they see someone thriving, the person gets hate mail and someone finds an excuse to bring them down. I guess people have reason to be hurt because everything feels hard and unfair right now. I'm also from a fucked-up third world country, I'm queer, my life feels stuck where it was before the pandemic, I can't get a job and I worry what it'll be like for me 10 years from now. But I kept saying to myself it wasn't so bad because it's really worse for so many people where I live and I tried to be upbeat... But then I saw a writer I know irl get published and I noticed I was feeling and thinking the same way those people I disliked act online. Angry at them for getting published when I don't have the skill or the luck for it. What do we do when that happens? Sorry if this is a pessimistic ask

Hey anon,

First of all, I'm really really sorry you're going through that, it sounds like a bad situation and I hope you can find some peace and stability soon. If it means anything, I'll be praying for you. <3 <3 <3

It's really hard to keep a positive outlook on things when other things in your life aren't working out. As you said, everything feels hard and unfair right now and you can't be blamed for feeling pessimistic and bitter about the way things are going for you. It's easy for me to act cheery because I'm blessed to be in a good situation with a good support network, and I'm aware that's something a lot of people don't have. You're incredibly strong for dealing with this and I'm proud of you for both surviving and trying not to let this bitterness affect the way you interact with the writing community. That's a testament to your good character and you're someone I'd like to have as a friend.

I think the biggest thing that's helped me not get bitter about other people's success is the "Holy shit, two cakes!" mindset.

I think this was made by @stuffman originally if "know your meme" tells true.

Life is a dessert table. Some people don't even like cake - some people are bringing brownies, cookies, tortes, pastries, jello puddings, fruit baskets, or whatever else suits their fancy. Chocolate cake ain't the same as lemon no matter which way you slice it.

Other writers aren't competition - everyone has their own voice and themes and stories to bring to the table. At the end of the day, I'm not trying to win over romance and grimdark true crime readers, and even within my own genre, if people like reading similar stories then they'll probably enjoy mine. A while ago I looked for comp titles to runaways and found a bunch of books that lit up all the same keywords with "sisters", "changelings," "seelie and unseelie courts", but they were nothing like the story I was trying to tell. I loved them all the same. Your words are important and meaningful and I hope this discouragement doesn't keep you from practicing your craft.

As far as publishing luck and money and time and skill goes: yeah the industry kind of sucks right now, there's no changing that. It might suck that you're not published yet, but hold onto that "yet". It's important. Hope keeps you striving, even if progress is stagnating at the moment. It's served me well through so many semesters slogging through engineering school when I didn't put a word to paper in months.

Helping other people can a tactical decision. I'm not published yet, nowhere near it. I started this tumblr (and the rest of my platform) for the sake of marketing and networking. One could argue I chat with the likes of @ashen-crest, @abalonetea, and @author-a-holmes for purely selfish reasons - if I help them out, hopefully they'll help me when the time comes. Maybe that's how it starts sometimes, but over time those connections become friendships so easily when people just want to tell stories together. I didn't have a lot of people to talk about my writing with when I was younger and I make no exaggeration when I say the community here on writeblr changed my life.

Friends make going through this painful slog of a life so much easier. I can't count the number of times I've cried in this past week about how fortunate I am to have so many people supporting me. From my sister who listened to my rambles off the top bunk every night, to my best friends in high school who helped me develop the bones of my world, to my college roommates and partners in crime who encouraged me to be more vocal about my work, to my boyfriend who patiently stood in lines for me at a book festival, to @siarven my first acquaintance here on writeblr 4 years ago, who I finally get to meet in person in a couple weeks. Maybe it sounds a little fairytales, but kindness truly does repay kindness seven times seven times over.

I'll keep writing my little fairytales. I believe in them. I hope you do too.

[hekateinhell]

I will always defend book Armand over this weirdass retcon and I'm a Muslim. Let them have their cake and eat it all, they support girls being raped, they support extreme DV, they support a Lestat that doesn't resemble any version of any Lestat known to man, I hope they drown in their feels. Leaves more room for the intelligent chatter to have adult conversations. The show has nothing to do with the VC universe except hypocrites.

I mean... I'm Muslim too, born and raised. I don't even know how this became an issue. I make a few posts this morning and suddenly I'm a racist and a pedo for wanting to see my favourite character in some sort of canon-like depiction. Like, damn. Now, I've lived my life and I have a thick skin but it's hilarious to me how this is essentially JA!Louis all over again.

It's such an anti-intellectual straw man argument to level against perfect strangers because they don't share your fandoms opinions. How does that truly negate anything I said and how am I supposed to respond to that? Sorry, I actually experienced rampant Islamophobia growing up visibly Muslim in post-9/11 New York. My real name is as Arab as you could possibly get, the TSA loves me. Me sharing my opinions on a casting choice for a crappy show on tumblr dot com is not racism or xenophobia, I'm sorry to tell you.

Me being upset about Armand's casting has nothing to with Assad Zaman. I would love to see more queer Muslim rep! It's an issue I've cared about since I was young, since it obviously affects my community directly. And I've said several times Rashid would be great as his own character! The absolute circles I have talked around myself to try to articulate my own opinions on my own blog every time it's come up in the past so I won't upset anyone... frankly, it's ridiculous.

And yes, the hypocrisy between people bitching about us Armand fans while wholeheartedly supporting the changes made to Claudia's character is unbelievable. Clearly, it's fine that Claudia in a "14-year-old's body" talks about sex all the times and is raped off-screen. It's fine she demands of her guardians, "Which one of you is gonna fuck me?!" and etc. This never happened in text, this is AMC creating problems that didn't exist. Not two weeks ago the same people were like "Oh, what if they're merging Claudia and Armand's stories together??"

So it's fine as long as they're getting what they want, that's the tl; dr of it all. This show pulled in less than half a million cable viewers last weekend, alright? It's really not that serious outside of our super nerd fandom spaces. It's not the successor to The Walking Dead AMC hoped it would be.

I don't talk about my religion a lot because this is a fandom blog, not a personal one. And I don't buy into the nonsense of having to reveal my private life in order to lend credibility to my opinions on a platform of strangers. I'm not going to list off my entire life history in the hope some randoms will take me seriously about vampires. And why would I share anything with people who behave like this?

But I do mention it in passing here and there and it is common knowledge to my fandom friends (Rashid praying was a fun time in the chat), so I don't want you to feel alone, anon. ❤️

[megamindsecretlair]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

I was tagged by the lovely @umber-cinders, TY

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

None. I just made an A03 a few weeks ago and it will take a long time for my brain to figure out how to put my stuff on there LOL. On Tumblr, jeez, let me see. I have 35? So far. I counted my two series as 2.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

Oh lordt, let me see. On Tumblr, I have...roughly 168,964 words across all my fics. YIKES. And I can't even write in my books LOL

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Marvel, They Cloned Tyrone, Snowfall, and Scream.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Sprung - Tyrone

Stay With Me - Tyrone

Sunday - Tyrone

Run it Back - Tyrone

Pray For Me - Franklin

Gonna link my masterlist because why not: Megamind's Secret Files

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I love getting comments. I want people to know I appreciate them taking the time to read and comment. I love discussing my writing.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably Through the Fire. It was such a sad ending! It had to be done! Someone said "What kind of sane person would write an ending so sad???" Literally made my day as a writer.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of them got happy endings LOL. But the one that ended the sweetest, hm, probably...Sunday?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope. I be in my own little corner of the innanet and all my comments and reblogs have been positive! It might change with my Kang fic and I'm okay with that. Block button is my bestie.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

YES! A thousand times yes. So far, they've all been one shot smut fics that resolves itself. I have some pt 2's coming, but I'm so behind on Tyrone asks. I'm sorry!!!! I will get to them, promise.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Never did a crossover. My fandoms are all over the place and the only one to use for crossovers is Marvel and I'm not that confident yet. I don't hate on folks who do, but not the type of fics I be reading.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of and I hope it never does. That's so heartless and unnecessary. Everyone can write. You don't need to steal.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. That would be a huge compliment though!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nah. But I'm constantly flinging my fic ideas at friends and they share with me. I love it.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I'm so not a person that ships, it's terrible. Canon relationships bore me to tears or I know that the writers are gonna do some fuck shit to break them up, so why bother? However, I'm obsessed with Attoye and Janine and Gregory from Abbott Elementary.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Believe it or not, I write fics in the moment and release them in the wild before I have a chance to go back and change everything. I only plot my series. And I plan to finish both series! I've been trying to think of what other series I can do.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I write dialogue pretty well. I'm able to write things in character and pay attention to their characteristics.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Do we have all day? LOL. Nah, I think scene descriptions are still my biggest weakness. I always put them in a white room and it's hard picturing it well enough to write it down. I'm trying to work on it!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I haven't done it. Only because Google translate only takes you so far and it doesn't take nuance into account. And I appreciate when there's translations after the fic. It's hard to copy on mobile and put it into Translate to figure out what was said.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I just started fic writing this year. LOL. I used to say I missed a crucial part of writing culture as a teen. But it was a Marvel Loki fic.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I can't choose between my babies! But it would probably be my Loki series. One of the chapters I finished, I was like??? Okay, you fuckin' ate that. I felt so proud of myself as a writer, that self-satisfaction is what I'm writing for.

No pressure tags: @soft-persephone @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @mybonafidefeelings @notapradagurl7 @sweet-potatah-pie @saturn-rings-writes @c-nstantine

[haejjoon]

Do you have any headcanons w ex machina in regards to how the whole chase-and-tease thing between akira and akechi are gonna go w the parallel of phantom thief lwader versus detective (one scene from the og game would be the "welcome home honey" scene)

sorry anon i am working thru these one at a time 😭😭 been off tumblr for a good bit.

headcanons, headcanons.... honestly i'm surprised its taken this long for someone to ask regarding my plans for them since it IS tagged akeshu, but it's also a very slow burn so i suppose there's that HDKSJH

i think that the chase-and-tease is very prevalent (and integral to akeshu's dynamic) so i'm very excited to explore their typical roles swapped!! as of right now they're caught up in a literal chase—akechi avoids akira like the plague, and akira hunts him down for sport LOL (not on purpose though. it really has been a series of fateful coincidences; thanks a lot, yaldy)

i think what i'll have most fun with is exploring the "tease" part. both of them know much more than the other is letting on, and part of the enjoyment is watching them snipe at each other while keeping their defenses so high. while in-canon we don't get to see it as in depth as we could (since we're only shown the ""twist"" at the time akiren's plan's already come to fruition) i'll definitely have a lot of fun picking that apart in swap.

in terms of specific scenes, though. "welcome home honey" will probably stay; i can see akira saying it to akechi with a shit eating grin on his face. i already drew out small comics for their billiards games, but to recap: akira intentionally throws the games, and akechi refuses to use his left hand. only when akira shows his true strength will akechi respect his opponent and show off his true hand.

akira also just hangs out at leblanc a lot. despite living and working there part time, akechi is shit at coffee and curry (loses his patience often and just doesn't have the Barista's Touch) and so akira likes to hang around and show him up, makes coffee beautifully. sojiro asks akira if he'd live out in the attic instead. akechi pretends not to care that akira's better at him at this (god he so does.)

other than coffee/curry though, akechi beats akira at pretty much everything he challenges him to, though a lot of it's attributed to akira never really rising to the challenge. akechi puts his all into beating him and akira puts up a decent fight, but ultimately loses, again and again, because as fucked up as it sounds he knows that serving akechi's ego is what'll keep akira around. but over time, akira holds back less and becomes more and more invested into their little competitions—chess, darts, billiards, arcade games, batting, debates—and realizes that oh, oh, he likes this. he likes that akechi forces him to fight. it's fun, and it's dangerous, and he's in way too fucking deep by the time november rolls around because as much as he wants to fight against akechi fair and square, how is he supposed to oppose the whims of the masters of the game? he's just the pawn who pulls the trigger, and he prays for dear life that his standard bad luck (curse affinity) will fuck with the gamemasters for good. he's a trickster no matter what universe he's plopped in, huh.

anyway thank you so much for the ask anon <333 and im so sorry i'm only getting to you now!!

[laurenkmyers]

(1/2) Hi, Lauren! Would you recommend me to watch Two Worlds? I'm debating with myself for a few weeks now, watching all these gif sets on tumblr. The things is... I find most of the BLs quite cringy which is a big no for me. Usually I like the BLs you're watching (I've really loved KinnPorsche, Not me, Kisseki, A Tale of 1000 Stars, ...), but there have also been shows you really loved but I wasn't able to finish - main example being Love in the Air (i just wasn't able to get past episode 3).

(2/2) Next shows I've tried but didn't finish are for example: Naughty Babe, Cutie Pie, Pit Babe. Could you advise me on which scale do you think the Two Worlds are? It looks intriguing but I'm afraid of a possible cringe lurking in the background. Looking at the BLs I've loved and the ones I didn't finished, would you be able to guess how I would feel about this one?

---

Helloooo sweet anon! Thank you for your messages!

Firstly, I must say, the bl's you listed that you enjoyed are superior. Well done on your immaculate taste. And the list you provided that you couldn't finish is also hilarious and accurate and I'm agreeing wholeheartedly on your opinions.

In terms of Two Worlds...I'm gonna be honest with you, I only started watching it for Max Kornthas. The man has a hold on me that I can't explain. So I may be slightly biased, however, that doesn't stop me from telling you that the show has surprised me in so many ways. I'm thoroughly enjoying it as a whole and hope more people watch it once it's finished. (Learning that it wasn't a domundi/mandee production also helped massively.)

Where it stands on a kp/notme level vs cutiepie/naughtybabe/pitbabe level, let me try and break it down for you:

Production level isn't quite kinnporsche WOW, but it's also not naughty babe cgi tiger TRAGEDY. It tips more on the kp side of production value. The locations are gorgeous, and the cinematography is pretty as hell. There are some dodgy camera tricks being used, but nothing to worry too much about.

The acting: As a whole I would say it's definitely better than your average thai bl. It's absolutely not Gun Attaphan level good. But I will say that Max is kinda killing it- and I'm not saying that from a particularly bias lens. His acting has improved an incredible amount since cutie pie/naughty babe. Nat, bless him, still has a little ways to go to really impress me, but he's also improved so fucking much I have to commend him. The guy playing the 2nd love interest is definitely the weakest actor of the bunch, but overall the acting is pretty good. No major complaints from me.

The narrative: I think this story in particular is incredibly interesting, it's unique, it's angsty, it's romantic, it's brutal, it's exciting, and a little bittersweet. The pacing can be a bit all over the place at times, but if you just go with it, you'll catch up quickly enough. The one major flaw for me in thai bls in general is that sometimes the story seems way more complicated then they actually are. This story really isn't that complicated if you don't think too hard about the details. Are there plotholes? Ofc there are. But it's nothing too glaringly obvious that I want to rant about it.

Another plus is that there is no quick-how-can-we-promote-this-thing-that-has-no-relevance-to-the-show product placement, which is something I only noticed two episodes ago but am highly grateful for.

The thai bl cringefactor: There are moments where I thought I would be cringing up a storm, but so far it's been pretty tame in terms of typical bl cringe moments. There's no guitars or singing (praying it stays that way), but we have had a few 'oops i tripped and fell into you and now we're staring into each other's eyes' moments, but honestly? They didn't bother me in the slightest. Maxnat pull off the elongated looks very well.

Spice level: We've only had one NC scene so far, it was definitely more on the romance side of the fence than the spicy one, but it lasted 7 minutes long...do with that information what you will. We've got more to come from both Maxnat and our side couple (who I'm also enjoying greatly, btw) Maxnat know how to fucking de-li-ver and from the looks of the trailer, our side couple also get a pretty steamy moment too.

The only potential downside to the show is the hefty trigger warning list. If you want to know them you can message or dm me and I'll make a separate list for you.

This response probably didn't need to be as long as it did, but I wanted to give you the facts. Do I think you should watch it? Yes. Do I think you'll like it? I think so. But is it to the standard of bl you seem to really enjoy? No. Do with this information what you will! And please feel free to tell me if you do start watching it and enjoying it because I'd love to hear your thoughts!

ps. (the CACKLE I let out reading that you couldn't get past episode 3 of LITA was wild because you're so valid. I skipped episodes 1-7 because I also couldn't handle the cringe, but if you did want to try it again- episodes 8-13 are much better- still a little cringe, I won't lie to you- but it's definitely the stronger of the two stories.)

[ripples-in-the-river]

ADVOCATING FOR GAZA AS SOMEONE WITH HYPEREMPATHY

Are you tired of seeing posts about the genocide in Gaza everyday?

I am, too. We all are. Trust me, everyone's tired, too.

I know that it's not because you don't care. You care so much that you don't want to see it, because it hurts too much, and you'd rather go on with your life and pretend you never heard of it.

I get it. Trust me, I do.

But I'm guessing that you wouldn't feel happy with just ignoring everything, either. Right? Because you care. Of course you do. Everyone does.

Let me present you with ways to advocate for the people of Gaza, and help spread awareness, without burning yourself out and wanting to just explode the entire planet and move on from the human race:

-Make your own posts. Spread awareness within the limits your hyperempathy sets for you. No need to use graphic images, graphic descriptions, anything that sets you off. Just vague but powerful terms, that explain the situation without making you want to die.

-Get your info elsewhere. Tumblr doesn't hold a monopole on militantism. Other news sites or papers cover the issue. Maybe they explain the issue in more positive terms, or in easier to swallow phrasings. Maybe they put the focus on what you can do to help, or which countries have taken an official stand against the massacre.

-Mute the tag. I know you feel guilty for doing it, but mute the goddamn tag. You can get your info elsewhere, sign petitions elsewhere, talk about the issue elsewhere. Tumblr doesn't need to be the place you talk or think about Gaza. So mute the goddamn tag if it's burning you out. Please. Do yourself a favor. Besides, burning yourself out won't help anyone. So mute it. There are other ways you can help.

-Sign petitions. There must be at least fifty petitions out there, all in favor of stopping the bombings. Some might be for your country to take an official stance. Some might be for the Israeli government to stop the war. Some might be for the United Nations to bargain for more than a four-day ceasefire. Maybe you'd like to sign some of them.

-Talk about it. There's a world outside Tumblr. Not everyone has an account (no shit, right?). Talk about it with people who might not know. Make a post on Facebook or something. Tell your aunt, or ask your teacher about it.

-Focus on the positive. Lord knows there's an overwhelming amount of negativity in this whole shitty predicament, but there IS positive. What's the positive? The volunteers. The heroes. The people working to get the war to stop. The famous people and politicians taking an official stance against the horrors. Us, on Tumblr, working hard to spread the word that what's happening in Gaza is straight out of a goddamn horror movie, like what the fuck, seriously, what the fuck even?

My point is that we all have our ways of helping. Some of us straight-up go to Gaza and take people out of the rubble. Some of us work at the UN to get a peace treaty going. Some of us work on the news coverage. And I bet they don't all have Tumblr accounts -- but their help is still very, very valid and very, very appreciated. Crucial, even. Absolutely necessary.

So when you hear about things that make you want to just drop dead, or that make you wish God would send another one of those floods and just be done with the entire planet already; when you're tired of hearing about dead children, bombed hospitals, panicked citizens and even more things you'd find on the Devil's daily crossword puzzle, please remember that there are other ways to stand up for the people of Gaza. You don't need to burn out. There are other ways to help. Fuck, you can send money, I bet; make your official Facebook status something like #saveGaza2023; you can pray, you can send money, you can use your political connections if you're involved in your local politics group, you can... I don't even know what else you can do, but I'm absolutely fucking sure of one thing: you can help without reading about all that bullshit about dead kids. So stop reading it if it hurts too much. Do other things instead.

[limbobongobingo]

Hey tumblr, hell site, digital void I scream into, the three mice following me. Let's talk about bedbug sex.

Traumatic insemination. What is it and why does it sound so horrifying? Because it is! And you know, I'd assume, I hope, and I pray to my political overlords, illegal for you to try.

Female bedbugs have a perfectly, perfectly fine and functional reproductive system but instead of using this male bedbugs, because evolution has no morality, inseminate female bedbugs with their needle, yes needle like penis.

Here's a schlong pic for y'all.

A bit if a closeup, save it for OnlyBugs jeezs.

Like I said before, they use this fucking nightmare to stab— tramatically inseminate if you will, female bedbugs. You maybe be thinking, "I'm sure they've evolved some kind of hole-orificey-thing down there Bongo . . . right?" NO! NO THEY HAVEN'T! I know if it works don't fix it, but what the actual fuck evolution! Not cool. Well I mean it is pretty cool that is why I'm here . . . Still, what. the. fuck.

I recently learned it causes CRACKS, VISIBLE ONES!

We get what happens, but how exactly? Female bedbugs actually get inseminated through their bloodstream! The fucking circulatory system!

When the sperm is deposited, it'll have antibacterial properties to go with it. Which yeah, makes sense. I wouldn't want blood dick diseases either! And, the real kicker? It doesn't even benefit the female bedbug! Its sole, singular purpose is to protect the sperm.

Now, thankfully, while it is stabbed into the female bedbugs circulatory system it's specifically deposited into this secondary reproductive structure called the mesospermalege. It's entire job? Stabby fucky wuky survival. Yep, that's what it does. It reduces the initial damage and is absolutely packed with shit that actually wards off them blood dick diseases this time! Wild.

Its the home stretch I promise you beautiful hopefully not illiterate mouse children you. We're almost done!

We know how, we know what it looks like, but actually why the fuck? It's apparently quicker then the conventional way, but I think they just wanted to spice up their sex lives. So take note aspiring parents, you could get a kid quicker and go to jail! A twofer! How absolutely positively great. I'm not the perturbed one here, you are.

The last notable section here, they just stabby stabby fucky fucky everything. Other males, other insects, probably inanimate objects on occasion. There is actually a theory about rollover insemination to explain the homosexuality, but really I'm not an etymologist and I choose to believe they just stab from dusk till dawn for no reason other than, you know, it works.

With that sprinkling of homosexuality, this concludes my ramblings on bedbugs. An insect that feasts on, and fucks in blood.

You're all welcome and I'm so sorry.

Let me know about spelling mistakes/stuff I got wrong!

[istilldontknowhowthiswork]

haha im fucked but trying

Okay, basically this is me forcing myself to write in english because I'm really insecure of it but I kinda want to try joining a zine as a writer and i sorta have to have something written by the 16th? SO YEAH FUCK IT, here's what I got so far:

It's gonna be a 5 + 1 times type of fic about Shachi getting to learn how to feel affection and love and everything that comes with it because boy- the north blue doesn't know how to treat kids right… He has issues but he's going to deal with it! The order at the moment is: Penguin, Law, Bepo, Ikkaku, the Polar Tang (Merry spirit is still a sore spot so yeah, im gonna make my own little ship/submarine spirit and it's going to get as much love as I want) + Shachi himself!

I already started writing the first part, maybe I'll post it on ao3 when I'm done with it but who knows… Well, Tumblr, I'll let you have a first taste at it below:

(SORRY BY ALL MISTAKES IT PROBABLY HAS, I DON'T HAVE A BETA READER)

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The first time Shachi remembers feeling it, he doesn't know how old he is. Just that he's young enough that people doesn't respect him yet, but old enough to people not care about him anymore. And that's not necessarily okay and maybe he'll never stop asking what makes it be to everyone else, but that's how it was and the only how he knew. The how the north operates, cold to even it's own kind. 

And Shachi, true to his kind and everything that he suspects being a northern is about, react's bad to it. 

Maybe he's dying, like all the others young/not that young boys he knows, or just "going on a trip to the see the lights up close" like his aunt and uncle like to say. Shachi likes to remind them he knows what death is, that he knows someday it'll be him because of some excuse or another— it was too cold, he had said something someone didn't like. He says it, even though deep inside he hopes it's just like that, like seeing the northern lights up close, like the boreal is involving him and taking all the bad feelings away. He knows that his uncle and aunt think he doesn't deserve that good of an ending. He prays he doesn't deserve one so soon. 

And Shachi, young but not young enough, the kid that can't be a kid anymore, looks at the little boy smaller then him and feels things. 

It's hard to tell his age, hard to tell everyone's age when they're all smaller than they should be and that's part of the reason Shachi doesn't know his age, because everyone else is not so sure about it so why should he? Still, the boy is small and Shachi was always the smallest so it's a good thing, a sign that the circles continue and there's always one more of them, kids that are not kids. There's something strange in his walk, like it's hurting him to do so. Shachi knows what that's like, what it means. 

He's hungry, he's tired, he wants someone to hear him even though he knows no one will. Just his luck as Shachi has been called "no one" by his family one too many times.

[celestialking]

praying that tumblr dosnt eat this ask like it has so man of my other longer ones

so my best friends joins a call crying telling us how her bf was ignoring her all day, then when he finally invites her to a vr world with him he doesn't fucking join, then when he dose starts yelling at her, she very obvisly crying and everyone in the call can hear it except him apparently and he leaves her to go talk to some other bitch hes been flirting with WHILE WITH HER. he told her "if your going to break up with me, lets just make the last few days good 🥺" LIKE MF WHY COULDNT YOU HAVE MADE THE WHOLE RELATIONSHIP GOOD?!?!??!?!

its pissing me tf off how he thinks he can just get away with treating her like this.

-🩸

:( that sounds awful