#like … talking to creators over the past few years i’ve noticed this is a huge thing

[deadtower]

fellow artists and writers what would we think about a discord centered primarily on engagement of your works? like … comment4comment, reblog4reblog, events where we all focus on/hype up a certain fic or art for the day, prompts every week to keep our creative juices flowing, etc?

there’s a real lack of actual engagement regarding our work and i really want to bring back that magic. people don’t understand how much that can do for your mental health as a creator and i want to facilitate a healthy and positive space we can all go to to get the attention we so rightly deserve

[nights-at-crystarium]

Rambling about Vivi and my relationship with the game

Okay the response to my previous post was bigger than I anticipated, you guys are making me feel supported and valid and thank you so much for that ;o; <3

I’m an anxious person and an overthinker. Should I just make art posts and occasional headcanons/analyses/observations? Should I be more personal? I made this blog with this specific purpose to be openly cringe about my new obsession, so I guess there’s no point in trying to moderate myself, worst case scenario people will just scroll past something that doesn’t interest them, right?

I’ve never really told you how I got into the fandom and how Vivi was born, although it’s a peculiar story. Maybe I’ll talk about my ✧content plan✧ too if there’s still post space left. So if you wanna know more about that, I invite you under the cut!

The background’s a bit depressing, a fair warning. I’ve been an mmo and oc nerd since 2012, my first game was Wakfu: quit in 2015-2016 but kept the ocs, about a dozen of them, still hoping to tell their stories one day, then GW2: another dozen characters that never really got the chance to grow into ocs. By the time I started poking around in ARR in 2021 I felt listless and fandom-homeless so to say. Both Wakfu and GW2 are pretty obscure to begin with, then the games themselves strayed too far from my standards and expectations, that on itself is worth a huge rant but this isn’t the place and time. Games do fail, fandoms do die down. I still play GW2 to this day since I find its mechanical aspect, a loud word fully deserved: perfect, it’s plain fun.

But in late 2021, when I still slogged through ARR on my own, I also watched WoodenPotatoes, my fav GW2 youtuber, play all the way up to 5.5. I share a lot of common traits with that guy, namely the cynicism :’D I was like, show me what you’ve got, convince me why you’re such a critically acclaimed game. GW2 and FFXIV are polar opposites in several ways, I won’t derail into comparisons either, just wanna say that I had my standards and a lot of criticism for the mechanical side of FFXIV (spoiler: I still do, but there are other empty niches that FFXIV fills for me!). I was in a full cynic mode, and even that didn’t stop me from being completely blown away, wiped from the surface of Earth when I saw the aforementioned guy play and comment on ShB.

Turns out there was one box unticked for me, I didn’t only feel unwelcome in my old games/fandoms, I also missed the safety and trust you have in FFXIV concerning the lore/story. Despite being an artist with a knack for oc development and interactions, I thought of myself as a mechanical mmo player. You know, raids, pvp, tryharding. I still find great joy in that, geez, I play GW1 (one) which regularly hands me my ass on a plate and I LOVE that, but yeah, I didn’t realize I also needed the comfort of knowing that I can emotionally invest in a game’s story and characters without worrying about the immediate future.

*claps hands together* Here comes the catboy!!!!

I’ll drop the highly specific and personal details for now since those are worth a full essay on their own, just gotta emphasize how much I needed this story and this character right then and there, at the end of 2021. The more I thought about him, the more at home I felt. That I could still survive into my thirties, go through everything in my life, feel nearly drained of will to live and create, and then meet a character that’d bring me back up to 100 within months, if not weeks.

My personal life’s still a mess too big to even mention it, so I won’t. I’m just aggressively burying my head in the sand and hyperfocusing on the new comfort zone. You can tell I’m being productive, each art on this blog is like, me actively trying to comfort myself, luckily it works every time.

So, new game, new passion, what about the character I experience that passion through? My WoL was a lala.

My WoL was a lala.

Look I didn’t even glam her properly..... I just loved the hilarity of the dragoon class flavor + pink potato, I farmed those sweet commendations because of that. I also had a catgirl on another account, I actively tried to find a character that’d click with me, that’d ground me in the game world.

I’d just watched WoodenPotatoes’ complete playthrough up to 5.5, my own progress was still at ARR, these two lovely lasses were.. Lovely, but I didn’t vibe with them. Bluntly speaking with the privilege of hindsight: my gay ass wasn’t at peace. I tend to gravitate towards male ocs.

Third time’s the charm, eh?

I was going into my own playthrough knowing that ShB isn’t only a storytelling masterpiece, but a vicious dating sim as well. My only braincell was already fixated on Raha and I needed a character for him.

That probably separates Vivi from many other WoLs. He was born for ShB, for Raha, with a specific purpose. Why elezen? Because, firstly, I’ve already been drawing elf people since 2012, it’s my comfort zone, secondly, by the time I dove into ShB I was acutely aware of the catboy WoL army, other races just never clicked with me, elezen however is the obscure cool kid among this bustling party of cat and bunny people. *shrugs* I just can’t help myself! I told you about Wakfu and GW2 specifically to point out that I’m drawn to obscurity, to niches, hell, hardly related but to prove the point: I’m also a rhythm game addict and I have an obscure anime rec blog. A vocaloid fan since 2008? Listening mostly to voca metal, alternative, all those nerdy niche things.

So I join a popular game, become obsessed with a popular character, and, being myself, choose an obscure race for my WoL \o/

Just to clarify, there’s no self-deprecation, only statements. I’m confident in my tastes and choices, whatever they may be, I’m only liking the good stuff >:D

Next part of the story you can already see if you scroll down to my first posts here. Knowing his destination, I started working on Vivi’s character, picking glams for him, slowly figuring out how to draw him (I’d say his visual development’s 80% complete by now). Fortunately for him, not only I’ve made 30+ ocs over the last 10 years, I also make adopts for a living. I’ve got the skills needed to develop a cool and happy character. Look, happy character =/= character without some kinda issues and angst, I mean happy as in relatable, believeable, alive.

Alive, that he sure is. If thinking about Raha as a separate character brought me back to life, looking at him through Vivi’s eyes made me feel like I’m in love too. Another thing to make clear: Vivi isn’t me, both him and Raha are my kin to a degree but I’m trying my best to stay aware and away from projecting. It’s just inevitable that you as a creator become some kinda medium/proxy for your character’s thoughts and feelings, and it’s beautiful. Even if I find myself in pain and wailing sometimes on their behalf, ha.

I don’t have much good going on in my own life so I live through my characters. It’s hard to explain how exactly I know things about them, of course it doesn’t come all at once. Vivi’s been around for 5 months now. I started working on his story early on, however I’d say my vision of him and Raha only fleshed out in the past 2 month-ish.

Can’t believe a weeb game made me write fics again. I’ve published one over on AO3 already, a few more are slowly cooking still, mentioning them only because they actually complemented my creative process behind art and comics, helped me get that elusive “feel” for the characters, and generally, surprisingly, approaching writing on a serious level did good things to my mental state, previously disastrous. My head feels like a much more orderly place now. Well, it’s also brimming with the catboy and elf feels, which is ever welcome.

So, I’m going about my business, then something clicks, I get an idea, a scene, an interaction, and rush to write it down. There’s a 20k+ words main document for my comic, several side-documents for later chapters and random unordered stuff, fics that fit into the main storyline and should be published within context. Soon I’ll be ready to start telling their story.

This post’s already too huge and waffly and wow if you’re still here, wow. You’re just as crazy as myself, but sincerely thanks for sticking with me :’>

I promised to talk about the so-called content plan, well, I sort of already did, mentioning the comic. If you’re observant, you may have noticed the name Fragments and some numbers floating around my tags. Fragments is the cheeky name of the comic, there IS a deeper explanation but I’ll leave it for another post. Whatever bits and pieces I’ve published under that name so far are “canon” and DO belong to the main story, however, I haven’t officially introduced the comic yet, there’ll be a launch and all that. Someday. Sometime soon.

It’s big and promising and exciting, still it’s just my personal project that I wanna be thorough with. Sorry for possibly being too vague about it, I take the “ship it when it’s ready” approach, I don’t rush things because they’re first and foremost for my own enjoyment.

For now thanks for looking at the random pics and comics I’m posting, I treat them as character flavor samples, as promo illustrations so to speak, while I’m chipping away at the main comic in the background.

Okay I spoke my heart out just like yesterday, feels nice. Thanks for all your support once again ;/////; <3

[fandomshatelgbtqpeople]

Legend of Korra is going up on Netflix in four days now. I’ve seen a lot of misconceptions about the show floating around, and since I was in the fandom back in 2014, I thought I would clear them up.

1. The last few episodes of Legend of Korra were streaming only because execs didn’t want the Korrasami endgame to air on Nickelodeon

Legend of Korra became online-only starting five episodes from the end of Book 3, more than a full season before the show ended. In his post-finale statement, Bryan Konietzko suggests that they didn’t seek approval from Nickelodeon to make Korrasami canon until they were almost finished writing the finale. I haven’t been able to track down a timeline for what episodes would have been airing at the time and Books 3 and 4 aired almost back to back, so it’s possible that the decision to take LoK off the air was made after they’d already had that conversation. That said, the last five episodes of Book 3 are easily the most brutal in the entire series, including several on screen deaths and a pretty rough sequence involving a character being poisoned, so I think it’s more likely that the show was taken off the air because of that. Bryan Konietzko also described Nickelodeon’s reaction as “supportive” but with limitations, which doesn’t really jive with the idea of taking the show off the air as a punishment, although it’s possible he sugar-coated things because they still have a working relationship. 

2. The showrunners were pressured into doing Korrasami by the fandom

Bryan Konietzko says in his statement that the writers had discussed Korrasami as a romantic pairing as early as during production for Book 1 but assumed they’d never be allowed to do it. Janet Varney (Korra) and Seychelle Gabriel (Asami) also discussed this on Janet Varney’s podcast in 2015. They speculated that fan interpretation of the relationship may have been what caused the showrunners to see the potential there, but said unequivocally that no one working on the show ever felt pressured to do Korrasami. This is a myth that was started by the more unreasonable members of the Makorra fandom in the aftermath of the finale because they were upset that they’d “lost” what was a pretty brutal ship war and were looking to invalidate the relationship in any way they could. 

3. The fandom was shocked when Korrasami happened because it didn’t have any build-up

This is another one that started with the worst parts of the Makorra fandom in an attempt to prove that Korrasami wasn’t the endgame the showrunners really wanted to do. The fact is that while the ship tease is mostly subtextual, the Korrasami fandom saw a huge increase in size over the course of Book 3 because LoK fans were noticing it, and most of the Korrasami fandom had started to suspect that the writers were intentionally taking the relationship in a romantic direction by the end of Book 3. We were surprised that it happened, but only because LoK was a kids’ show, and no major character on a kids’ show had ever been shown in a same-gender relationship before. The general consensus was that there was intentional romantic subtext between Korra and Asami that was unlikely to become text because Nickelodeon would never allow it. I can’t tell you how frustrating it is to see this myth being repeated by queer fans who are apparently unaware of its homophobic (Yes.) origin.

4. The Korrasami endgame is so subtle that no one would have known it was canon if it hadn’t been confirmed by the showrunners

Lo and behold, another myth that started in the Makorra fandom as an attempt to prove that Korrasami was forced and shouldn’t have happened. I don’t know what to tell you other than that there were three days between when the finale dropped and when Korra and Asami’s relationship was confirmed by the showrunners and we all knew it was canon during that time. The only people who were denying it were, again, the worst parts of the Makorra fandom. Here are some articles and reviews that talk about Korrasami becoming canon that predate the confirmation by the showrunners (one is linked above, the other is here). Going back to the previous point, several of those articles also discuss how fans had long suspected they were hinting at a romantic relationship.

5. The showrunners shoehorned Korrasami in at the last minute to get “representation points” 

I’ve already addressed the myth that Korrasami wasn’t the intended endgame until the last minute, so I’ll move on to the myth that it was done for “representation points.” Neither of the showrunners ever capitalized on Korrasami. I know we’re all primed to expect this now because of the shit Dreamworks and Disney have been pulling for the past couple of years, but the Korrasami endgame was not publicized at all prior to the finale. Nickelodeon never did press around it, and the showrunners didn’t really participate in the publicity it got after it aired. If you look at articles about the Korrasami endgame that were published in 2014, none of them even have quotes from the showrunners other than the ones taken from their confirmation statements. Bryan Konietzko admitted in his statement that, due to corporate censoring, he thought the final product fell short of a “slam dunk” for queer representation and apologized for not having queer representation in the Avatar universe sooner. Those are not the words of someone who’s patting themselves on the back. Additionally, the Legend of Korra comics and Kyoshi novels, which the showrunners are directly involved in (the comics are written by Michael Dante DiMartino himself) and which don’t receive much if any oversight from Nickelodeon, are both unflinching in their depictions of same-gender relationships, which speaks to the idea that having that representation in the Avatar universe is something the showrunners deeply care about.

6. Korrasami was queerbaiting

This myth actually just comes from as misconception about what queerbaiting is. Queerbaiting is a phenomena in which creators of a piece of media intentionally lead queer fans to believe they can expect queer representation that the creators have no intention of ever delivering, just to get them to consume the media. Not being able to make a relationship as overt as you want to because of network censors is not queerbaiting, nor is intentionally queercoding a character in order to try to get around censorship (this was once the only way we ever got representation, and accusing older shows of queerbaiting because they were doing their best within the rules they were given is a bad look). By definition, The Legend of Korra cannot queerbait because the characters are canonically bisexual. Even if the network had put the kibosh on the Korrasami ending altogether, Legend of Korra couldn’t have queerbaited because Korra and Asami were genuinely intended to be queer. 

Thanks for reading. I hope you all learned something that will make you less likely to buy into myths that started during a ship war with origins that were more than a little homophobic. I can’t tell you how trying it is to see this stuff get spread around in queer fandom as a queer fan who (1) knows where it came from and (2) knows that it’s factually wrong.

mod k

[captain-s-rogers]

The Party Effect

(gif credit to the creator)

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader Word Count: 1,305 Warnings: drinking, implied smut Square Filled: Summer Camp AU A/N: Another square for @marvelfluffbingo​​​​​​​ 2020! This is a rewrite of a fic I have previously posted on my Supernatural blog (@d-s-winchester​) so don’t come at me about plagiarism and shit. It’s my writing and I’m allowed to tweak it and repost it however I’d like. As always a HUGE thank you to the best bestie around @arrowsandmixtapes​​​ for looking over my stuff and making sure it isn’t terrible. If you want to be added to my tag list please let me know! Feedback is cool :)

“They’re here,” she said, with a wicked grin. 

“What do you mean they’re here?”

“I mean the new batch of counselors are here. Elizabeth showed up with all four of them.”

“How is that possible?! I thought they weren’t due in until tomorrow.” 

“I guess they showed up early,” Lacey shrugged.

“Well, let’s get them some drinks and go introduce ourselves,” you said, sobering up slightly. 

Lacey nodded and you handed her two beers as you grabbed another two before going to meet your new guests. Elizabeth greeted you both with hugs before turning toward the group of people she’d shown up with.

“Y/N, Lacey, here’s the new blood, Chris, Sebastian, Anthony and Scarlett,” she smiled, “guys these are our gracious hosts tonight Y/N and Lacey.” 

You said your hellos before handing each of the newcomers a beer. Your drunken mind still wasn’t letting you comprehend that the newcomers arrived a day early but you weren’t about to complain about it. You’d struck up a conversation with Chris while Lacey was talking to Sebastian. Your conversation was interrupted, however, by someone calling your name.

“Yo! Y/N/N! Tables clear, you’ve got winners!” 

You nodded over to the friend that had called out to you before turning to Chris to apologize. 

“Got dibs on a game?” he chuckled. 

“Beer pong,” you smiled. “My name’s been down since the party started. You’d think hosting the party would give me first pick, apparently that’s not the case.” 

Chris nodded. “You got a partner?” 

You glanced over at Lacey who was too busy hooking up with Sebastian to notice what was happening around her. “Well, Lacey was supposed to be my partner but it seems like she’s really preoccupied. So, no, I don’t. You any good?” 

“I’ve played a few games in my time,” Chris chuckled. 

“Alright,” you laughed. “Let’s see what you’ve got.” 

“Yo, Y/N/N you coming or what?!” 

“Don’t get your fucking panties in a knot, Brett! I’m literally walking over!” 

Chris followed you out the back door toward the large table that was set up in the middle of the clearing behind the cabin. The cups were already set up and Brett was standing on his side of the table along with his teammate. 

“Who’s the new guy? Where’s Lacey?” 

“Lacey’s occupied,” you chuckled. “This is Chris. He’s my new partner. What’s it to ya? You worried or something?” 

“Well not really, you always carry the team,” Brett shrugged. “We’re still gonna kick your ass.”

“Suck it.” 

Brett just smirked and turned to his teammate as you turned to Chris.

“I hope you’re better at this than you let on cause Brett and I have had a beer pong rivalry that’s been going on since freshman year of college and I am determined to knock him down a few pegs.” 

Chris grinned at you mischievously, “I think I can handle this. You ready?” 

“Ready.” You grinned.

The game started and Chris was clearly playing down his beer pong abilities because he was dominating the game. It had come down to one last cup in double over time. You’d missed your shot and you were reeling, it was entirely up to Chris to win the game.

“Ok, Christopher. I’m counting on you here. Don’t fuck this up for me.” 

“Don’t worry, Y/N/N.” He chuckled, “It’s in the bag.” 

You silently prayed he was right and stood there watching as he squared up and took the shot. You held your breath as you watched the ball fly through the air. It was a perfect shot and it landed in the cup with ease. You jumped up and down screaming with excitement as Chris wrapped his arms around your waist and picked you up to spin you around. 

“Suck on that Brett!” You called over Chris’s shoulder to your opponent. 

Chris chuckled as he set you back down on your feet. You smiled up at him, unable to contain your grin.

“I could kiss you right now!” you said. 

“So do it.” Chris challenged, smirking.

You didn’t even think, instead you pushed yourself up on tiptoe to make up for the height difference and pressed your lips to his. As you were kissing Chris you heard Brett yell over to you that you had the next game. You waved him off, however, knowing that you would be far too preoccupied to play another game of beer pong. 

You woke up the next morning with your head pounding. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d experienced a hangover so bad. You climbed out of bed still groggy and unsure of who was still in the cabin. Without thinking you grabbed a pair of pants off the floor and pulled them on before heading out to the kitchen to get some coffee. The fact that the jeans you’d pulled on were way too big and kept falling off your hips was  the last thing on your mind when you saw Lacey standing at the counter already pouring you a cup of coffee.

She handed you the steaming mug and you accepted it with a smile. You took a deep drink of the caffeinated beverage before either of you said anything. 

“How drunk were you last night?” Lacey asked. 

“Well,” you responded, “I still have my pants on, so not that drunk?” 

“Dude,” she chuckled as you squirmed a little, hiking up the pants. “Those aren’t your pants.” 

You turned bright red as flashes of the night before filled your mind. You remembered kissing Chris after the beer pong game and leading him to the bedroom. After that all you could remember were the very explicit images from the night before. You looked up at Lacey, your eyes going wide as she looked at the doorway behind you.

“Anyone seen my pants?” you heard Chris say and your cheeks flushed once again. “Oh, there they are.” 

You could hear the smirk in his voice as he came up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. 

“They’re a little big,” he commented, kissing your cheek. “But they look good on you. Any coffee left?” 

“Yeah, there’s another cup in the pot,” Lacey grinned. “I’m gonna take this cup to Sebastian. Talk to you later, Y/N/N.” 

You nodded at Lacey as she walked past you, still grinning.

“So last night was fun,” Chris smiled at you, taking a sip from his mug. 

“Definitely,” you smiled weakly, the explicit images from the night before flashing in your mind once again.

“How about we do it right this time,” he suggested. “Dinner. Tonight. If you’re free that is.”

“I’m free,” you smiled, regaining your composure. “Dinner sounds great and I promise not to get in your pants this  time.” 

You smirked looking down at the jeans you were wearing and Chris laughed. You had a feeling you probably would end up in his pants again you were just hoping that at least this time you’d have more than flashes of images to remember.

@arrowsandmixtapes​ @the-murder-strut-murdered-me​​ @growningupgeek​​ @phoenixfyre374​​ @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan​​ @captain-rogers-beard​​ @patzammit​​ @what-is-your-plan-today​​ @sagechanoafterdark​​ @kitkatd7​​

[natromanxoff]

Queen live at Hyde Park in London, UK - September 18, 1976 (Part-1)

An interesting bit about the Hyde Park gig (thanks to Jane Palm-Gold): "The white boiler suit Fred wore coming onstage was especially chosen by him so that he could be seen from miles away (because white stands out at a distance) and even better (and this is great but you have to know this place really - a London landmark for many years) it was acquired at Lawrence Corner at Euston (!), a tatty second hand clothes /hire place where a lot of clothes /outfits were hired from for band promo shoots - for instance they had a lot of military stuff there."

(x)

After the success of A Night At The Opera (and not to mention how the weekly Sounds readers' poll elected the band #1 in the best album, best single, and best band categories), Queen wanted to pay the British fans back for back their loyalty and support over the last few years. Whilst in Japan earlier in the year, they came up with the idea to stage a massive free concert. With the help of record industry entrepreneur Richard Branson (creator of Virgin Records/megastores) they started making plans for the Hyde Park show, which turned into a mini tour along with the Edinburgh and Cardiff shows. It is estimated that between 150-200 thousand people turned up at Hyde Park, which is still a record for the venue to this day. This show cemented their position in the top bracket of rock bands. The stage used was the same stage that was constructed for the Rolling Stones concert at the Knebworth Fair a few weeks earlier. 

Queen's first huge show at home brought certain areas of London to a grinding halt, and space on public transportation was at a premium. The concert took place on the anniversary of Jimi Hendrix's death. A banner hung from a tree that read "Hendrix Lives," and at one point in the show Brian May noticed it with much appreciation. The band are seen in the photos above arriving at the venue, where they were joined backstage by Pink Floyd's Roger Waters. Supercharge, Steve Hillage, Rufus, and Kiki Dee (along with a cardboard cut-out of Elton John, who couldn't make it to join her for Don't Go Breaking My Heart) played before Queen (Be-Bop Deluxe and John Miles were supposed to be on the bill as well, but were axed for some reason). A pro-shot video of Steve Hillage's performance exists as well as Queen's. There was a fight in the audience during Hillage's set, during which he played extended trippy versions of It's All Too Much by The Beatles and Hurdy Gurdy Man by Donovan. Also notable is Supercharge's singer Albie Donnelly parodying Freddie Mercury in a white leotard and a half mic stand. The first half of the A Day At The Races overture is aired publicly for the first time (the upcoming album had been partially recorded by this point). The usual Bohemian Rhapsody opening sequence then commences for the last time. The band make their entrance, and everybody near the stage stands up (the audience had been seated on the grass for the opening acts). This angers many fans who are further back (roughly 90% of the audience now cannot see the stage), so they start lobbing cans, bottles, or whatever else that can be thrown. After a few songs, Freddie asks everyone simply to calm down: "I have been requested by the constabulary for you not to throw little things around, tin cans or whatever. So make this a peaceful event, ok? Sit on your arses and listen." Brian, after his solo spot in Brighton Rock (he stutters a bit, revealing that he's still nervous): “From one piece of nonsense to another, I’ve said it before. This is something we wanted to do with the London Philharmonic but they didn’t show up, so we will do the ethnic version of a song called '39." He is seen in a dazzling new outfit tonight, which he'd wear every night through Japan 1979. It would become the outfit he'd change into during the opera section of Bohemian Rhapsody. "Clap along and stuff," he urges the audience, as he plays the intro of what he'd later describe as the first song about Einstein's general theory of relativity. After '39, Freddie audaciously performs the as-of-yet unreleased You Take My Breath Away alone on the piano, even hitting many of the falsetto notes that he'd excise in 1977 versions. He then gets cheeky and introduces The Prophet's Song as "a little shorter number from our album A Night At The Opera." Perhaps he still had You Take My Breath Away in his head, as he begins the a cappella section with what would become the first line of the A Day At The Races ballad instead of the usual "oh, people can you hear me?" bit. He also references Death On Two Legs, as he had done a few times earlier in the year. After Stone Cold Crazy, the band play Keep Yourself Alive and Liar, having dropped Doing All Right and Lazing On A Sunday Afternoon from the set. The combination of these three heavy numbers would prove to be very effective, and they would stick with it for their following North American tour. Liar is a great version, with many great Mercuryisms throughout. Before the last song, Brian coyly says, "This is In The Lap Of The Gods, or something like that." The band play a similar set to the ones they did in Edinburgh and Cardiff, except they drop Doing All Right, Lazing On A Sunday Afternoon and Tie Your Mother Down. They intended to perform their usual encore of Big Spender and Jailhouse Rock, but the show had run a half hour past its scheduled ending time (a curfew strictly enforced by the authorities). The police threatened to arrest the band if they went back on stage, and Freddie was later quoted saying how he would prefer not to be stuck in a jail cell in his leotard. And so, Bob Harris was left with the unenviable task of announcing to the crowd that the show was over. He later recalled how difficult and nerve-wracking it was to tell an audience of this size who had waited for about ten hours that there would be no encore. Now I'm Here was the first encore every night around this time, making this the one time between 1974 and 1986 where the song is not performed. The liner notes of Live Killers suggest that Now I'm Here was dropped from the set for a while, but that is patently untrue. People in one section of the audience chanted "Why are we waiting," all in good fun, knowing full well the show was over. The police soon turned off the main power feed to the park, forcing hundreds of thousands of people to make their way out in sheer darkness. Their reasoning was that it was the only way to "control" such a large number of people who had been rowdy throughout the day. In a 1977 interview with Capital Radio, Brian recalls the day: "It had a great sunny day for it, and everyone had a good time. There were still altercations on the day, and there was a big thing with the powers that be because they wouldn't let us go on and do the encore, about which we were very upset, having worked up for months and prepared for all that. They got very frightened because there were 150,000 people in Hyde Park in the dark, and they thought they were going to get out of hand. But in fact, there was no possible danger happening at all. Everyone was peaceful and having a good time."

This show is what epitomized their popularity in Britain, and when they felt they "had really made it," as Brian would later recall. On another occasion he said, "I think that Hyde Park was one of the most significant gigs in our career. There was a great affection because we'd kind of made it in a lot of countries by that time, but England was still, you know, we weren't really sure if we were really acceptable here. So it was a wonderful feeling to come back and see that crowd and get that response." Despite the fact that the audience had been there all day watching the various opening acts and waiting, the band delayed the show as long as possible just so it could get dark enough for their lighting and various other effects to make their full impact (as demanded by Freddie). Throughout the show, the band's nervousness and excitement for the occasion are evident. Most of the audience couldn't see a thing during Queen's set, since the stage was barely elevated. "The smell of the dry ice and the sound are the only sensory memories I have of this show," recalls Jane Palm-Gold. Here is an article from the day of the show, 

and a review from a week later (both were submitted by Boris Arkhangelsky).

Tonight would be the final performances of Flick Of The Wrist, Son And Daughter, and the (almost) full The Prophet's Song. A snippet of The March Of The Black Queen would be performed only once more in 1978, but a different part of the song.

Here is  a Virgin Records flyer.

The second pic is the famous overhead shot that appeared in the October 9, 1976 Melody Maker. Pic 5 was submitted by Janneman,  and pics 6 and 7 were submitted by Lukáš Bosík.

Fan Stories

“Well, I was 13 years old and had got into Queen through Night At The Opera and THAT video. I'd never been to a gig before and it took a lot of convincing of a sceptical mother to let me go to Hyde Park on my own. After answering the inevitable "no, I won't talk to strange men mum" questions I was allowed to go. The morning came and I was up at 6am, got my packed lunch together (can you imagine going off to a gig now with your sandwiches and orange juice!) and headed off to Hyde Park. I remember getting there so early that I was right by the crash barriers at the front and determined to try and hold my spot all day. As the day progeressed however I ended upmoving backwards slowly as people pushed in. I can remember savouring the whole build up, the support bands, everything. As dusk started to fall, the stage went dark and the dry ice started up. I broke my mums don't talk to strangers bit and a very nice bloke put me up on his shoulders so I could see them come on. I just remember the crash of light and sound as they came on as if it was yesterday (and not 27 years ago!). The rest of the gig was amazing and that was it, I was hooked on Queen and rock music. I saw Queen on every tour they ever did in England (and a few in Europe) after that but nothing compares to that first gig for me.” 

- Andy

Part-2

Part-3

[jokerfan99]

Slideshows (RWBY/RVB) by Necroceph

*RVB Opening Theme*

Inside the Blue base, Mess Hall

Gary: It wasn't my fault. I only help, Wyoming kidnapped the alien. Tucker: Junior! His name is Junior, asshole! Church: Not your fault, huh? What about that time when you tried to blow me into pieces, you lying jackass! Gary: Knock knock. Caboose: Who's there? Gary: You are all dirty dirty Shisnos. Ha Ha Ha. Caboose: You're mean!

The atmosphere in the mess hall is filled with insults and anger, both from the Blues and Gary. They traded words like ' Dirty Shisno' and 'Backstabbbing AI' at one another. Church said this is supposed to be an interrogation but look at the results on the reunion of two enemies. Weiss and Blake can see the whole situation and think that: "Yep they know each other." They turned away and continued to where their conversation had left off.

Blake: So, Ruby and Yang, are here in this canyon? Weiss: Yes. Blake: And they're still not happy to see you. Weiss: Sigh. Yes and... Blake: Wait don't tell me. They attacked when they saw you. Weiss: Well, Ruby didn't attack me and I was the first to punched her. But Yang, she almost tried to tear my head off if it wasn't for, Caboose! None of this wouldn't have happened, we would... Blake: Weiss, you don't have to remind me about it. Look you can't just keep hating each other forever. The past is the past. How about just give yourselves a chance to talk with each other and settle aside your differences. Weiss: Except that won't work like how you did with, Sun. The last time we met was when Ruby tried to hit me with a drip stand. Anyways, why are you doing here exactly? Another Xenotarian aid assignment? Blake: Before that, yeah. The ship I was in was flying was running out so I had to stop by here to fuel up. I found a base but the inhabitants there are... Weiss: Let me guess, they're all dead. Well we're in a war, after all. What did you expect? Blake: War? Weiss: Oh right, you may not have heard about this. We're currently at war with the Red army. Not sure why they're called that but I've been told they're a bunch of arrogant Insurgents that needed some discipline. Atlas sent me to aid the Blue Army as a support. Blake: And the Blue army are? Weiss: They're an independent military force from a neighboring colony. According to Atlas intelligence, they got a huge disagreement with the Reds to decide which property they own. Blake: That seems understandable. But I taught you can't enter the Atlesian Army after you... Weiss:... Blake: Sorry to bring that up. Weiss: None taken. Nah I still couldn't. But out of the blue, they decided to give me another chance by performing an assignment. If I transfer myself to another army, live through it and won the war, I can finally get into the Atlesian army like I wanted to! Plain and simple. Blake: Really? Wow, that's something I've never heard, Atlas would do. It's a very good second chance for you. Though I've never of any war in this sector. Weiss: Hmm, maybe the White Paw forgot to update about it. Church: Ahem!

Blake and Weiss turned to Church.

Church: Will you two shut up? We're interrogating here. Blake: Is he always like that? Weiss: Oh don't mind him. He's always a jerk. He's name Church. "Leader" of the Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha. If you ask me, he's the most incompetent team leader in this base with a hair trigger temper. Still waiting for Command to accept my request to becoming leader. The dark blue one's, Caboose or Michael if the name's too weird for you. He's lacking some brain cells. Probably from a bullet to the head, but he's alright when he gets the job done. The bright yellow is Kaikaina. Now keep your distance from her, she's a disgrace to women everywhere. The only thing she talks about is having sex. But not as worst as the aqua guy named... Tucker: 'Sup. Weiss: Sigh, Tucker.

Tucker approached the two, with his eyes fixated to Blake since the time she arrived here. She looks like the type whom he can hooked up her with her easily. He delivers his signature one-liner.

Tucker: Hey, baby. Never met one with cat-ears before. Maybe you can hear the cry of nature through them asking you to... Blake: I'm married and have two children back at home, thank you very much. Tucker: Fuck... do you still wanna hang out? Church: Alright, Gary, enough with the insults. Let's cut to the chase. First off, how did you survive the blast and more importantly, where's Tex? Gary: I would  tell you, once Caboose stops attempting to punch me. Caboose: Take that! And that! And that!

Caboose's fists passed through, Gary's holographic body to no effect at all.

Church: Stop it, dumbass. Caboose: Okay. Church: Now will you explain? Starting from the time when Andy blew up. Gary: As you wish. Luckily I've prepared a small presentation designed to easily explain my creators to what had transpired from the base I was in. Caboose: Oh give me three minutes, I'll get the popcorn. Kaikaina: Wait, we have popcorn? Tucker: Of course we do. It's popcorn, not a strip club. Kaikaina: Sigh. Someday.

Three minutes later and Caboose returns with the bowl of popcorn.

Blake: I only got here and met these people an hour ago, and I don't understand what's going on. Weiss: Me too. Hey Church.  Would you mind telling us the whole story here? Church: It worked with a guy named, Wyoming and tried to kidnapped Junior. That's all. Weiss: Gee, you're helpful. Caboose: Don't worry, I'll tell you the story. Weiss: Thank you, Caboose. Gary: As you all already know, I am the one who tricked you all into thinking that I'm a computer intelligence made a dead alien race which never existed and in reality worked with Wyoming to use the alien to manipulate his race as a savior and win the war. Church: Duh, who else doesn't remember that? Blake: Uhm... Weiss: Ahem. Church: Oh except for these two.

Gary creates a holographic screen big enough for the Blues to see. There's a title at the left upper corner which reads: "My Story: A PowerPoint Journey". The first slide he showed is a crudely drawn scene as if it was made by a three year old kid in his first attempt on Microsoft Paint. This made some of the Blues to laugh, Caboose makes better art than this! It depicts what looks like the pelican flying toward a base with an unknown trifoil logo on it. The Blues have never seen it, but Blake has. It was the same design she saw from the base she landed at.

Gary: Moments after, Andy exploded. The ship veered off course and coincidently crash landed on the Project Freelancer Operational Command Center. Kaikaina: Project Freelancer? Tucker: Aw crap... there's a base full of those fuckers?! Gary: Yes. Church: What about, Tex is she alright? Gary: She was dead when it crashed. Church: Sigh... crap.

The second slide shows Tex lying on the ground with a black box written with the words... well... "Black Box" on it.

Gary: The staff managed to recover Tex's corpse and the black box containing Sheila, Omega and me. They stored us inside containment before the Director decides what to do with us. Church: Director? Who's that? Gary: He is in charged with Project Freelancer.

The third slide shows, white armored soldiers running for their live as something, what looks like a generator,  behind them gets blown up or catches fire. Drawing's aren't so detail don't blame me.

Gary: Few days after the crash, one of the base's generators overheated, causing a chain reaction that freed me and Omega. No one knows how it happened but it is suggested that this wasn't a coincidence.

The fourth shows one of the soldiers laughing evilly over his dead comrade as the base behind him was on fire.

Gary: After we were freed, Omega started possessing the staff and killed them off, one by one, until Utah was left alive. I hid within one of the computers to hide from the chaos. For days I've waited for rescue until I met Blake. Does that answer your question?

Everyone are silent by Gary's story. Some don't believe him since his a liar, others were wondering whether he's really telling the truth. But the one thing that they all agree, is that Omega is back and is now somewhere on this planet wrecking havoc. Weiss and Blake, on the other hand, was not getting any sense of this.

Weiss:... Caboose: I like the last part. Kaikaina: O'Malley's back. That's bad right? Church: OF COURSE IT'S BAD! Weiss: O'Malley? Caboose: Oh that's what we call, Omega. The angry AI that tried to kill all of us. Blake: Wait a minute, you lied about being the base's computer system? Gary: Surprise, dirty shisno. Ha Ha Ha. Tucker: We told you he's a liar. So, where's O'Malley now and don't try lying this time! I'll tear of that AI chip from that armor and smash it with a hammer! Gary: Okay okay. I do not know where he is. I haven't seen him after the killing subsided. Church: Shit. Then he could be anywhere and inside any person on this planet. Tucker: But what of that 'Project Freelancer' stuff? Sounds like a military experiment. Church: I think he's referring to that classified military experiment, Tex took part in. The one where they implanted O'Malley into her armor. Weiss: AI implantation? I heard about that back at the Academy but it's very risky. What's a research like that doing on this war torn planet? Unless... this war is perfect place to run a military experiment. Church: That sounds like a plausible theory. But let's get to that later. For all we know, O'Malley's loose out there and his probably planning to take revenge on us. And the worst part, we don't know where he is. Caboose: Maybe we can ask the white guy the cat lady brought. Tucker: Hey good idea! He was from the base and probably the last person to saw O'Malley. . So where is he now? Blake: I had to lock him up in your base's janitor's closet. Tucker: The janitor's closet? Uhh... did you notice anything... off? Blake: No, just dirty mops. Tucker: Phew! Church: You disgust me, man. Well at least we got a lead. Blake: I'd advice you guys to be cautious. He's not mentally stable right now. Church: Thanks for the advice, lady. Tucker, Kai. Come with me. Kaikaina: I'll be the bad cop. Church: And NO strip teasing! Kaikaina: Pfft, asshole. Church: Caboose, Weiss. Take good care of our guest and keep an eye on, Gary, will ya? Caboose: Can I burrow your eye? Church: No.

Church, Tucker and Kai leaves the room.

Blake: I can't believe you just lied to me. Why would you do that after I found you? Gary: Well I didn't want to stay there forever so I had to use you. Blake: And that part of you going offline was a lie too? Gary: What? No. That was not originally part of the plan. I almost died if you hadn't removed me. Weiss: This is what I hate about military AIs. They're too human like to be controlled. Blake: I taught at one point you were interested in Dr. Catherine Halsey's theory of AI flash cloning? Weiss: Heh, true. But that's because Cortana was modeled after a human brain. So, Caboose. Now can you tell us what exactly transpired here before we both came? Just tell us the whole story. Caboose: Yay, storytime! This is going to fun. So you see, it started with me arriving at Blood Gulch and this tank lady named, Sheila...

Thirty minutes of the Blood Gulch Chronicles

Caboose:... and I said, "I meant why are we up here in the sun, when we could be standing down there in the shade". And then we stand under shade. The End! Weiss:... Blake:... Weiss:... This might take some time for me to process. Blake: Definitely. Though I kinda like this Doc. He's a very nice guy despite being possessed by a raging computer program.

Clearer Version: https://www.deviantart.com/necroceph/art/Slideshows-RWBY-RVB-860686887

Deviantart: https://www.deviantart.com/necroceph

[x--daughters-of-darkness--x]

I TALKED TO AMY LEE OF EVANESCENCE ABOUT INSPIRING THE WORLD’S WORST FANFICTION

The singer of My Immortal (the song) has now read My Immortal (the fanfic)

If you mention the name “My Immortal,” you may mean one of two things. The first is the 2003 hit song from rock band Evanescence. The second is a Harry Potter fanfic so transcendentally, mysteriously bad that it’s transfixed the internet for years.

The fanfic My Immortal is about a time-traveling mall-goth teenage vampire wizard (named “Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way”) who is obsessed with Evanescence and a variety of goth-inflected rock bands. She’s supposed to look like Amy Lee, Evanescence’s lead vocalist, pianist, and songwriter. And to this day, nobody is sure who wrote the story or whether they were serious.

Back in the real world, Lee and the rest of Evanescence have spent months under stay-at-home orders during the coronavirus pandemic. They’ve used that time to film two music videos in collaboration with director P.R. Brown, each shot by band members and their families. The latest is a surreal video for “The Game Is Over,” a song from their upcoming album The Bitter Truth. In Lee’s words, it’s shot as a “psychological thriller,” full of imagery based on a specific fear or inner demon from each member.

These videos — filmed in living rooms, cars, and other personal spaces — give fans a new kind of look into the band members’ lives. But I was curious about a different kind of fan relationship: did the creators of “My Immortal” know about My Immortal? I spoke to Lee, and the answer is yes; in fact, it’s part of a long-running family joke. She’d never actually read it, however, until last week.

You’ve made two videos under quarantine, and they’ve taken very different approaches. What was the process behind each of them?

We really had to just think kind of quickly. We were working on another video treatment that would have been full-production, this whole deal with a big crew and things we could no longer have because of the pandemic — including the fact that we couldn’t even physically get together because we live all over the world.

We recognized that “Wasted on You” had a bunch of lyrical content that felt like all of a sudden where we were. So we went for that. I really wanted it to be real on a level like people hadn’t seen us before: in our own homes, in our real lives, not dressed up, not in makeup, just the real, raw us.

For the second one, it’s like “Okay, how do we take what we’ve learned and amp it up even more to make it look like a real video more than just us being ourselves?” We have all been very serious about the lockdown, so we have been completely alone for the most part during this time — and that is cool in some ways as a creator. But you really have to live with yourself all the time.

A few of us have gone through some difficult things in the past few years. [Bassist Tim McCord] and I both experienced losses in our immediate family. There’s just been a lot of hard. So you know when you’re finally forced to stop being distracted by all the things that keep us happy, there’s silence — and that stuff comes out. So each of us had a private kind of gut-spilling confession with [P.R. Brown] about what we’re struggling with.

We were just sharing deeply in a way that we don’t normally go all the way with when it comes to at least our visuals. When I pour my lyrics into my music, it’s always really raw. But in this, it’s like, we’re not going to hold back on the video side and just make it beautiful — we’re going to go for it and let it be ugly and share the dark parts of ourselves.

I think of a lot of your music as being open and vulnerable, and you interact with fans online. What does filming a video at home like this communicate that your normal social media presence and music don’t?

I hope it just shows more and more of that willingness to be vulnerable because as hard as it is, it always leaves me feeling more satisfied than just putting on a pretty face.

Social media’s such a weird world for me. I love it — I’m grateful for the idea that we can have a direct relationship with our fans. But it’s kind of a double-edged sword. It’s such an open platform for everybody to criticize everything about you. And when you go there, you’re going to see that. I think that’s true for everybody. It doesn’t matter if you’re a celebrity or not. It’s just a place where people don’t have to show their face to say things, and there’s a lot of ugly out there.

What’s your relationship specifically with fanworks? Do people send you things that were inspired by you?

Oh my god, it’s so wonderful. We’ve got so much art. I’ve got this huge collection of stuff that I’ve been hanging on to just from the beginning. There are so many talented people out there that pour their efforts into making a piece of visual art that is either of something in the Evanescence world or just something else that came out of them while they were listening to our music.

Then there are other things that you have to keep because they’re so hilariously funny. People will make a crazy poem that makes totally no sense but I’m a character within it, which is awesome. It’s like, I know this person’s like 12 years old and totally sincere, but this is so funny. I have a little studio, and I dedicated a little bit of time during our unexpected free time to cover it wall-to-wall in the bathroom with all the fan stuff.

Which brings me to my next question: had you ever heard of My Immortal?

I think for quite a while I was just unaware of it. And then my cynical, Reddit-loving younger sister who’s also an English teacher, somewhere during the holiday every year when the family’s all together, it’ll come up for some reason. And she’s like, “Wait — you still haven’t read My Immortal?” And I’m like, “No, what do you mean?” She’s like, “You have to. Okay, hold on. Let me read you an excerpt.” And then she’ll pull up her phone and read some awesome paragraph from the craziest, funniest thing ever that makes no sense.

It’s one of her favorite things that she thinks is the most hilarious thing in the world, and I still just kept not reading it. It’s been kind of this ongoing joke with us. And then I got a call a few days ago that you wanted to talk about it, so I was like, “Oh, crap. I have to read a little bit of it.”

I read I think not quite half of it, but it did have me in tears. I was laughing really, really hard at one point, just because of the nonsense. And then I started asking myself, is this real? I can’t quite tell. I’m totally undecided. Is it sincere? I feel like it started maybe as sincere, but they got in on it and started playing it up for the haters. I can’t tell! What do you think?

It would have to be so elaborate, but there are a bunch of cases that really make it seem like this person knows much, much more than the character they’re putting on.

I noticed a misspelling that was like, instead of triumphantly, it was “triumelephantly.” And I was like, come on, you don’t think “elephant” is inside “triumphant.” There’s no way.

At one point, the main character’s name is spelled two different ways within three words of each other.

I totally saw that, too! I’m torn because I want it to be sincere, kind of... but I don’t know.

There are things about it that aren’t cool to talk about. Like it’s not funny to talk about slitting your wrists. So it takes me a second to get past that joke, which is so recurring.

Yeah, if you go back to old internet culture, a lot of it is really ugly. And it’s weird trying to separate that stuff out.

Is it better now?

I don’t know because now I’m too old to know what’s going on. But kids do seem nicer. They often seem nicer.

I would like to believe we’ve grown up a little bit as a society from that. Maybe everybody having a little bit more of a microphone has taught us some things that we need to be aware of that are outside of our perception and our personal experiences. There are other people that are seeing that in a different way. I think it would be cool if that’s true.

I was a teenager around when My Immortal came out, and it feels like it describes a very recognizable “goths versus preps” rivalry. Did you feel that?

I think this thing is poking fun at that world — I mean it would have to be, come on — and that part of it really resonates with me in a real way. But I didn’t consider myself goth! Part of what’s weird and funny is like okay, this is describing hating the preps, and you’re the cool one, you’re the underground, you understand real life and the gravity of death, and I get it. But if you’re so depressed and everything’s so hard and you’re so real and they’re so fake, why do you put so much effort into your look?

That was what always turned me off about the word “goth” when that started being assigned to me in our early days. If I was 15 years old and you’d asked me what I was, I’m grunge. I buy all my clothes at garage sales, I don’t do crap to my look, I get ready two seconds before school, and all the preps are the ones who put all their focus on their looks and what party they’re going to go to.

But yeah, that part was funny to me. That part existed.

I love the idea of you knowing about this thing for years without having read it.

I kind of want to thank you because I did get a really good laugh out of it last night. It’s not like, when I have free time, I’m motivated to go read some horribly bad thing. But it’s actually pretty interesting.

And you’ve gotta love all the characters breaking into song to sing My Chemical Romance songs. It’s pretty great.

[a-lil-perspective]

I don’t want to be that person—

But I really need to get this off my chest. This is the culmination of two months buildup of thoughts that have been screaming far too loud for me to continue simply taking in stride. I can’t do it. I apologize in advance, for anyone who actually reads this, if this is a deterrent to you about my character or my minuscule space taken up here on Tumblr. Again, I really can no longer remain silent. If it’s any solace:

I tried.

Where to begin. First off—as much as I’d love for this to be an update on the next chapter of Remember Me, it is not. For those of you who’ve kept up with the story, I’m sure you’ve noticed my uploading pattern these past few weeks has been reduced to solely weekends—and barely that, might I add. While I will try to have Chapter 9 up within the next few days, I cannot guarantee when. At this point in time, it’s not a lack of creative streak, it’s a lack of time. I have all these outlines and segments in my head but can’t seem to even catch a breath much less put the story down in my notes or in Word for later edit and upload. But I’m trying. I really am. As I’ve said before: I will finish this story, come hell or high water. But currently being engulfed in the former has been a huge burden.

Per my past psa’s: My health? Two giant thumbs down (nothing to do with COVID-19). Personal aspects? Two giant thumbs down. Both are and have been slowly corroding me. To avoid this post seemingly grabbing for sympathy, I’m going to just stop there with that. But I’m truly suffocating in this corner.

Next point in case: I’m going to be completely candid here. It’s extremely difficult and utterly exhausting to continue posting fics. Mentally and Emotionally. The pressure to post. The pressure to post because if you don’t in a timely manner, you lose your momentum and “fall behind” when you post again. Then you’re right back to square one thereafter because people have grown absent in your absence. It’s exhausting and stressful to spin in that wheel.

It’s difficult when you pour every drop of energy into a work, only for it to sit largely unnoticed on your blog. To stay up literally all night making sure your punctuation is impeccable, re-reading the same fic over and over before you post until your brain explodes and you utterly forsake the fic the minute you hit that post button. To take up space on a post tagging and adding those notes and engaging flares that go unrequited. It’s... well, it’s detrimental. It gets you down. It gets me down. I’m not going to lie about that. We all want validation and I will be the first to shoot my hand up in acknowledgement.

I’m going to stop right there as you’re reading to clarify: This is not a call-out post. This is not a guilt post. This is not me giving an ultimatum. This is not me demanding reblogs. This is not me telling you “your likes don’t matter” (I have literally seen that on posts and it kind of disgusts me. That’s all I’m going to say about that for now).

Reblogs, while unanimously appreciated, are not a priority to me. Comments and feedback and communication are invaluable to me. That’s it. That coveted and intimate interaction between the Writer and the Reader. One is not more important than the other. We’re a team, a unit, a force that balances each other on a broad, diverse scale.

I don’t ask for much—I don’t ask for anything here, actually (unless it’s directed towards the general audience over what y’all would like to see, which largely goes unengaged whenever I bring up). No, I don’t post fics that frequently. No, I don’t crank them out as quick. No, I don’t have that many. Yes, I’m new to fanfic writing. But I work quietly and solely with all my own plots and dialogues and ideas (I love prompts and requests, though). Thus my usually hefty works. Y’all get the whole nine yards. But I don’t feel like I really get to bounce my ideas around to others, which can further exacerbate that sense of isolation for me around here. I put myself through a really long process for every single thing I write because, the quality of my work matters to me. A lot. So I try to take my time to deliver that. And... I guess I just hope you know that or can discern that as you read each time.

Another astronomically exhausting aspect is this platform itself. It’s painfully evident to me, in my four meager months here, that Tumblr is just one big popularity contest. Who can upload the most, the fastest, the most efficiently. Who has the most followers. Who accumulates them the quickest. A place where your “exposure” is literally at the mercy of others. And when people purposely don’t want to aid in that, it spirals into this really toxic mindset causing friction between Writers and other Writers, causing unnecessary strain, avoidance, insecurities, and hinderances to YOUR precious work. And I’m not about that. It’s a no from me.

Also, I’ve just got to interject with this bit: Bad Batch Writers. Bad Batch Writers struggle. In my opinion, from what I’ve seen, it’s like if you aren’t writing for a popular Clone like Wolffe or Fives or Jesse, you don’t get traffic. Which I think is just... kind of corny. Okay. I think it’s really corny and ridiculous. Please know that I’m not saying anything bad about those Clone babies, the people who write them, or anything like that. Please don’t hear what I’m not saying. I’m just making a point. Bad Batch does NOT get enough love. And the Writers ultimately suffer because of it. That’s all there.

We’re all supposed to be in this together. Your work—your writing—is neither good nor bad. There’s no such thing. There’s only YOUR writing; your unique, beautiful words that I LOVE more than anything, that only YOU speak. We all speak a different dialect and flow through our storytelling. And it’s a beautiful, wholesome thing. It always has been. It should never be this detrimental stage Tumblr has made for content creators. Let’s be honest: Tumblr is not the ideal place to thrive. And I’m just... sick of it.

I’m beyond an exhausted state. I can’t remember that last time I wasn’t. (I know everyone is, with the ebb and flow of our world’s daily uncertainties during these unprecedented times). But for me, personally, it’s getting increasingly harder to keep up with the reblogs and comments and blogs of all the stories I love, while updating my work and trying to interact on my blog, while battling my health and nonexistent energy, and constantly be exposed to the “Tumblr Tumbles”, as I call it—the overbearing popularity and the waiting and the wondering and the silent seething because of it. It’s just too much. And it doesn’t take a detective to pick up on that attitudinal shift around here. It’s all just one big, pernicious cycle. And seeing that here nearly every day, exhausts me. I don’t know how else to convey as much. But I just can’t do it. And honestly, I get this overwhelming loneliness just being here.

I don’t know what I’m trying to say. I’m going to continue doing my thing until my engine sputters out. I’m going to keep up with storytelling, because I love it more than anything. I just needed to get this off my chest. I’m just rambling. I might delete this but, I might not. Who knows.

I just... Geez. I need to know that I’m not just shouting into the void over here like always.

Communication to me is key. If you don’t want me to tag you anymore: tell me. If you don’t want me to message you: tell me. Please. Just don’t like me? Cool. Tell me. It’s better to know and communicate than to walk on eggshells around everyone and everything. I’ve applied that flawed strategy throughout my whole life and I strongly dislike doing so. It adds no benefit to either party. Just be honest with yourself and others. That’s always super important.

For those of you, my handful of regulars who are around... you know who you are. Thank you. My thanks is but a meager conveyance of my undying gratitude for you. But I want you to know how much I appreciate your presence here. Words cannot express.

@halzore... You are a real mate. You are an incredible being who is not only insightful but, a true muse here. I look to you as more than just a devoted Reader of mine, and you should know that I would NOT have gotten this far with my Bad Batch Post Order: 66 series—or any of my Bad Batch works, for that matter—without your encouraging words. Holy cow. You’re a dearest friend. Your writing, art, and musical talent leaves me in awe. (A truly brilliant mind, please go love her y’all). Thank you for seeing all the good, little things in me and my work. It makes this all worth it. You make it all worth it. I get really overwhelmed thinking about it. But I just want you to know I appreciate you so much.

To anyone who’s ever left me kind, encouraging, and wonderful comments... I remember them. I do. I think of them when I’m down, and I think of them now as I write this—which is in my dispirited state, ironically. But I appreciate it. I think it is so SO important to lift each other up with words. You don’t have to reblog and all that (only speaking for myself here). Just take a moment to say something kind to someone. It makes someone’s entire day, week, month, year. Please... love other Writers. Love yourself. We all struggle. But let’s do it together. Let’s be there for each other.

Come talk to me. I don’t bite, I promise. Tell me about your day. Tell me something about yourself. I care. I love that interaction, because you are MORE than just a Reader to me. You are a valued human being with feelings, desires, wants, needs... come share that with me. If there’s something you’d like to see in my future works, something that would engage you more; please, come tell me.

I’m going to try and get better. At writing, at navigating this strange place, with my health, with life. I’ve been at my breaking point for so long that my barely held together pieces and exposed, worn chinks are almost uneffected and unresponsive to any help or healing. But I’m going to try.

Thank you for being here. I’m sure it can be hard to have patience with me and my nonexistent uploading schedule, but, I do have several wips in the works (teases in my masterlist in case you’re wondering). They’ll come around. :’)

Keep your head up and shining, lovelies. And I’ll try to do the same.

[mary-nesbitt-larking]

Why I moved from Choices to Lovestruck (and you should too)

It’s no secret to anyone who knows me well that I was a BIG Choices stan. I ran three Choices blogs (begging-for-kamilah, ask-kamilah sayeed and ask-priya-lacroix) for a long time, fulfilling fanfiction requests and interacting with many wonderful people. During my time in the fandom, I made some beautiful friends and created brilliant memories that I wouldn’t trade for the world. Unfortunately, as time passed, I started to notice a decline in the quality of content that Pixelberry were providing, and after a lot of hesitation, I decided to remove the app and leave the fandom. I was very lucky in that a very good friend introduced me to a different app with a similar style. Lovestruck was something that I’d heard about on the grapevine but had no idea what it was or if it could possibly compare to the fun that Choices had given me over the years. After a lot of resisting and stubborn behaviour on my part, I finally gave it a chance and have never looked back since. Here are just some of the many reasons why you should too:

There are no forced love interests in Lovestruck. That’s right. You read that correctly. You choose your love interest BEFORE you start the story so there will never be any frustrating interactions with characters that you’re not interested in. Remember in Bloodbound Book 2 when you go to Paris with Adrian and Jax (leaving the only two female love interests at home) and you were forced to hold hands with one of them (until Pixelberry later apologised and altered the scene)? There is definitely none of that to worry about in Lovestruck. The person you’re interested in is the only character who will show interest in you, and the entire story will be centred around him/her/them. 

Speaking of which, it’s time to talk about the fantastic level of LGBTQ representation in Lovestruck. Non binary characters aren’t just side characters. They actually have their own routes, as well as a huge array of adorable side characters. There are also demisexual characters, asexuals and of course, plenty of lesbians and bisexuals. Voltage (creators of Lovestruck) also very proudly celebrate pride month by releasing incredible LGBTQ content.

On the topic of representation, something that has to be applauded is the racial and religious representation in Lovestruck. You can romance Jewish characters, black characters, south American characters, Asian characters and I’m sure the list goes on. Choices fans might be sad to find that you don’t have the option to customise any love interests or MCs, but I think that this is a blessing. 

Something that I find very cool about Lovestruck is that there are different stories for every love interest. For example, if you romance one person from a certain book, romancing another from the same book will get you a completely different story with a totally different route. It’s a stark contrast to Choices, in which Pixelberry- quite literally- copy and paste the same lines for all the available love interests. 

And along the same lines of copying and pasting, it’s very refreshing to see that Lovestruck doesn’t reuse faces. I always found it terribly off putting when you’d be playing a Choices book and a love interest from another book would be your waiter or waitress. 

One brilliant thing about Lovestruck is the way that they present the MC. Every MC has their own unique personality and backstory. Whilst that does mean “less choice”, it’s really refreshing having an MC with parents. With siblings. With a job. A life. An actual story outside their love interest. There’s one MC who discusses her experiences as a woman of colour, and I think that’s exceptionally important for the player. 

On a superficial note, Lovestruck has GORGEOUS art. I did love the art in Choices too, but I don’t think it has anything on Lovestruck. The backgrounds are stunning, but it’s the characters who are gorgeous. Not to mention, we get absolutely beautiful CGs. This is something Choices sorely lacks. In the later books, the LIs and MCs even blink and move which I find gives it a more engaging feel. There are also MANY more facial expressions for every character in Lovestruck. Blushing faces, a neutral face, smiles, angry faces, sad faces, shocked faces, anxious faces... It’s not just the same standard five like in Choices. 

Another superficial- but very cool aspect- of Lovestruck is that almost every outfit is 100% free. The MCs and LIs will change their clothes whenever appropriate and you don’t have to pay a penny. The only time when outfits will ever cost any in-game currency is if it will mean you gain a CG out of it, but in my personal experience, I’ve only ever seen this being the case for two books. 

This is just a side note but something I love in Lovestruck is that adorable animals aren’t paywalled. They’re just there. Your love interest might have a cat- or a bear in one book- and you don’t have to pay to love up on them. They’re just another part of the story.

Still on the more superficial side of things is the music. I will totally admit, I LOVE the music in Choices and have a fair bit of it downloaded to my iTunes. But for anyone hesitant to move over to Lovestruck for the sake of the music, don’t panic! The music is just as brilliant, just as catchy and just as heartfelt. 

One of the things that always stressed me about Choices was the in-game currency. Diamonds were expensive and unfortunately, every single chapter would involve multiple diamond scenes. In many books, the diamond scenes were so important to the story that to go without them would mean that huge chunks of plot were missed. The amazing thing about Lovestruck is that if you choose not to do the premium scenes (the currency is hearts) then it does absolutely nothing to the story whatsoever. The heart scenes are purely there to give you a little bonus but whether you choose to do them or not, nothing about the story or your relationship with your love interest will change. 

And whilst we’re on the topic of heart scenes, it’s important to note that whilst Choices usually has 3-4 diamond scenes PER chapter, heart scenes only pop up around 9 out of every 12 chapters, and you will VERY rarely find anything that costs more than 30 hearts. 

The system to earn these hearts is totally different to Choices. Whilst you could watch ads to earn diamonds a few times per day, plus playing chapters would gain you two diamonds, Lovestruck gives you “quests”. Every few hours, the quests refresh and all you have to do is read a certain amount of chapters of a specified love interest, and you get the hearts. It’s a win/win situation because the more you play, the more you get.

Not to mention, every day you get to earn a puzzle piece and when you complete a puzzle, you win a certain amount of hearts. It seems tedious at first but they add up fast! 

And it’s not just hearts you earn, either! In Choices, you would use “keys” to read a chapter. In Lovestruck, you use “tickets”. Some quests mean that if you read a certain amount of chapters, you get given 2, 3 or even 5 tickets so you can just keep on reading! 

Since I’ve addressed some of the Lovestruck mechanics, I just want to talk about how much I love that you can fast forward, rewind, autoplay (it plays hands free and there are three different speeds to choose from) and even choose the chapter you’d like to play. This is amazingly refreshing because when it comes to Choices, you have to start the entire book again if you want to get to a specific chapter, AND you have to click through it fast because you can’t fast forward. 

Oh, and when you’ve played a chapter, a little heart symbol will appear next to it if it has a premium scene so you know whether or not you need to save your hearts! 

I really want to address the smut scenes. I know that sounds like another more superficial topic but I think it’s pretty important. I think there’s something more “mature” about Lovestruck and smut. The sex scenes are tasteful yet somehow sexier. They’re not rushed at all. And Voltage aren’t afraid to include actual kinky moments. 

More importantly, though, is that Lovestruck addresses virginity and handles it incredibly tastefully. It’s done in a realistic fashion, too. Sometimes, characters don’t really feel like having sex with their partner. Sometimes they want to at first but then feel anxiety. Sometimes they’re scared. Sometimes they want to stop half way through. Sometimes they have trouble reaching orgasm. All very real scenarios that are addressed tactfully and beautifully. The virgins (be they the MC or LI) in Lovestruck are realistic. They don’t just dive into bed. It’s a process. There’s fear along with excitement. There are moments of panic. It’s not just smut for the sake of smut. It deals with adult situations, something that I always thought Choices struggled with. 

Actually, it’s not just sex. These character get anxiety, depression and genuine mental health problems. And it’s dealt with so perfectly, yet so realistically. They’re anxious when it’s appropriate. 

I don’t want to bash Choices too badly, as I don’t think Pixelberry are an evil company, but some of the things they did- particularly towards the end- were unforgivable. 

Hana Lee’s infertility and the way that it was merely glossed over was appalling. As someone who is also infertile, I can tell you that you don’t just “get over it”, even if your partner is carrying your child. 

I’ll also never quite get over the fact that when you’re almost raped in Red Carpet Diaries 2, you have to pay 30 diamonds if you want someone to stay and comfort you. As a sexual abuse victim, I think that’s grotesque, and a glorification of rape. 

I can safely say, there is NOTHING like that in Lovestruck, and just to reiterate, all the important plot points are FREE. 

To bring this mood back up a little bit, something I think is really cute is that when you’re choosing the love interest you’d like to romance in Lovestruck, you can see sweet little facts about them, including their birthdays, their height and their personality traits. 

Sometimes the stories cross over, too, and love interests will appear in each other’s stories. And the cute thing is, if you’re romancing an LGBTQ character, it will be canonical that whichever love interest crosses over will be in an LGBTQ relationship with MC. 

There are also fun little side stories that you can play, and to really make things interesting, you can often play the same book but from the point of view of your love interest! These do usually cost hearts but not many at all. 15 hearts can get you things like 4 chapters, for example! 

I just want to talk about how wonderful Voltage are as a company, too. You can tell this isn’t about money for them. They just want the best for their players and it shows. They are often asking the community what they want and bringing out polls, and they will always let us have our say.

There are also no false promises of stories being “in the works”. If a story is abandoned, they won’t lie about it. There are no “politician’s answers” from them. Just pure transparency. 

The last thing I want to talk about is the writing style. Lovestruck’s style is worlds apart from Choices. To describe it for you, Choices feels like playing a fun app with cool stories. Lovestruck feels like reading a book, immersing yourself in a novel. And the style is unbeatable. 

TLDR; it’s time to cut the apron strings and move on from Choices. Lovestruck awaits! Tagging @lovestruckvoltage because I love you and appreciate you.

[tabletoptime]

2020 Creator Wrap: Favourite Works

so i got tagged by @robinlikeitshot which is !!!! super neat!

Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (or so) favorite  works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link  them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought to the world in  2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so  we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

-

i sure wrote stuff this year. like. a surprising amount of stuff, honestly. i'm now 15 chapters into my longfic, and i've been steadily creating at at least a few thousand words a month if not more. it's kind of really nice? especially since i've only gotten busier as time has gone on lol. i can definitely blame all of the peeps on discord for that one :p so in no particular order

1) Take It Back Now Y'all

yeah this one was obvious. this is my baby, my passion project, and the piece i keep coming back to over and over again. i'm so proud of this story, and while sometimes working on it can be frustrating, other times it feels like sitting down and getting comfy. i love writing in Tim's voice, and the amount of feedback has been incredible. it's now at over 1000 kudos, and everytime i remember that i freak out all over again. i'm hoping to finish it this year, but its always going to hold a special place in my heart

2) We're Not Driving (How did we get here?)

this was my first attempt at a giftfic, and every time i think about it i'm reminded of one of my favourite people, and for that alone i love it. though i should really go back and fix this one continuity error that i notice everytime i read it. bonus points if you know what i'm talking about :p but yes, i got to write hurt/comfort, i got to Project Hard onto a character i love, and i got to make someone i care about smile. heck yes

3) Each Life Touches so Many (Or Leaves an Awful Big Hole)

surprise surprise, this one isn't a Tim fic. i am and will continue to be an absolute ho for alternate universe crossover fics, in which characters are forced to confront the Maybes of their own lives. and when Castlevania gave me a maguffin as pretty as the Infinite Corridor in its second season, well. i really had no choice. i cracked this one out in like two days and its got some of my favourite action in it. also a pissy dhampir x2. it was a lot of fun and Sypha is The Best

4) No Need to Deal with Dragons

so i tried to JayTim week this year and oh boy. i had Ideas and Plans and a lot of them just didn't end up working the ways i had hoped. this fic on the other hand was exactly what i wanted when i had the idea for the Fairytale/Based on a Book prompt. the Enchanted Forest Chronicles meant so much to me as a kid, and getting to play with that world even a little was so damn cool. also i got to make the Outlaws cats, and that will never stop being funny

5) Orographic Lifts

another not-DC fic, and another bit of shameless self-indulgence. time travel and wings and assassins, oh my. i'm pretty proud of it, all things considered. less because i think its super good or something, but because i joined a pleasantly small discord full of some awesome people, and this fic is the product of a bunch of yelling of ideas back and forth. its also kind of a symbol to me of how i'm getting more comfortable with sharing creatively online? i would have never dreamed of writing this fic last year, let alone posting it. not because i wasn't capable of it ideas-wise (though it probably would have been a very different fic in terms of style), but because i kind of consider this a Niche Interest, and i've played those very close to my chest for a long time. this year has been huge for me in creative growth, and just being able to be a part of creative communities, and this fic is a culmination of all that

it's been a hell of a year, y'all. here's to a better one going forward <3 (also i didn't check if any of you i'm tagging have already done this because i'm lazy, feel free to ignore)

@epicmusic42 @selkienight60 @batbirdies

[keitheaverage]

something occurred to me just recently. I’m not here to shake the table or put words in any creators’ mouths, so bear with me, and take this with a big ol’ grain of salt.

Here’s my theory: Tugger’s role got greatly diminished in the 2019 movie because of the fact that he is widely recognized by fans to be an either bi or pansexual character.

Now I know what you’re thinking: “Riley you absolutely buckwild buffoon, what would make you reach for such a conclusion?”

Well, I don’t think it takes a film major to see that Tugger’s sexuality is a huge part of who he is. Not to mention his song is supposed to be about how strangely fickle he is about his preferences, about how he’s always changing his focus from one desire to the next, and the older cats being disgusted and annoyed with his habits and with the fact that he’s so brazen about his sexuality. (Sound familiar, my fellow bi/pans?) In some productions of the musical he flirts with both toms and queens in equal amounts. The 1998 version with John Partridge playing Tugger, AKA the most widely-available version that most fans have seen and accept as the definitive version, radiates bi energy.

But my one big “piece of evidence” is Mr. Mistofelees’ number. In most versions of the play, Tugger is the one singing it, right? And while obviously the amount of homoerotic subtext depends greatly on whoever is playing each tom in what show, the fans, at least, have Gone There. Even the actors of the 2016 Broadway Revival were saying Tuggoffelees Rights! Nothing is confirmed, but the subtext is There, sis.

And I think this means that, retroactively, ALW has become aware of that fact. Because who did they choose to sing (or at the very least lead) Misto’s number in the 2019 film? Victoria. Y’know, his love interest?? That thing we were all saying that Tugger was to Misto since 1998 at least?

(more rambling under the cut)

Now one might ask, “Oh yeah? well if Tugger being a bi-con got him the ax, then why didn’t they ax Misto as well?” Because he’s an integral part of the plot, Karen: they need him and his magic to snatch Old Deuteronomy out of Macavity’s clutches. So they shoehorned in a m/f romance with him and Victoria and hoped nobody would notice (said with no disrespect to Mistoria shippers, of course, but this just didn’t vibe well with me).

But since just about anyone could sing Misto’s number (well, preferably anyone with an iota of chemistry with him), there wasn’t much else protecting Tugger’s role from getting diminished greatly. And not just in Misto’s song (though that does smart pretty hard), but in the movie he dips like the second his song is over and doesn’t even get his solo in Old Deuteronomy’s number. We only see him again for a few uncomfortable seconds of Bustopher Jones’ number and sometimes kinda-sorta in spurts during the Jellicle Ball.

Now, I know this is accusing ALW of a lot (bc while he did have a hand in the movie, Hooper is the director and likely is making the big calls for how this all plays out), but we are talking about the same dude who wrote Love Never Dies nearly 30 years after the bittersweet-but-important ending of POTO just so he could write Raoul as a total dick and Erik could flex on his ex. Not to mention, if we’re gonna talk about diminished/downright axed roles, let’s mention how they completely cut Jemima’s role out of the movie. You know who played Jemima in the original 1981 London play? ALW’s ex-wife, Sarah Brightman (who also played the OG Christine in POTO when the two were still together, which makes LND slap juuust a little different). I’m not saying he did it for that very reason, but I’m also not saying that I’d put it past him.

Now motive-wise, I don’t have anything to say that ALW and/or Hooper whittling Tugger’s role down was in anyway driven by personal bias or anything like that, like cutting Jemima’s role could have been, but this is a major motion film made for international release, so despite us heading into the year of our lord 2020, we’re still hardpressed to find decent LGBT representation since filmmakers are still trying to make their films marketable to countries with much less tolerating opinions on LGBT people. D!$ney allegedly did the same thing to Shang from Mulan in the remake because of his supposed attraction to both Mulan herself, and to her more male-presenting persona, Ping.

pictured: me, thinking I’ve hit some galaxy-brain level of enlightenment as I ramble incoherently

So, in short: I think that the people behind Cats 2019 cut the Rum Tum Tugger’s role substantially from the film because they, at the very least recognize RTT as a highly-theorized-as-Bi/Pan character, and since that plays quite a role into his identity, and most importantly, to his relationship with Mr. Mistoffelees, they reduced his role greatly so that they could keep the PG rating and sell the movie to international markets.

But hey, that’s just a theory. Chances are, all of this is just be one big coincidence and I’m reaching for the sky here as the average fandom Tumblr user does; but if it was true, then I would not be surprised at all.

[inkedsoldier]

AMOR VINCIT OMNIA - Chapter Ten

A/N: Here it is – chapter ten of the AMOR VINCIT OMNIA series! Writer’s block struck me while writing this chapter, but I think it turned out pretty well. I really appreciate all the feedback I already got on the series so far. Upcoming weekend I will spend some time on the requests I got this week (inbox is open!). Chapter eleven is planned for next week. Enjoy & please let me know what you think. Thanks for all the support!

Y/N = Your name.

Y/F/N = Your first name.

Y/L/N = Your last name.

Y/N/N = Your nickname.

Characters: Sam Drake, Nathan Drake, Victor Sullivan, Y/N.

Warnings: angst, fluff.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this story. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No copyright infringement is intended.

Masterlist

Chapter Ten Recruited

The sound of thunder startled Sam out of a nightmare. His cheeks were wet and his body bathed in cold sweat. The sheets were twisted around his limbs, probably because he was trashing in his sleep. With his heart pounding in his chest he sits up straight. Almost losing you yesterday didn’t do him any good. And not to forget the way Victor Sullivan judged him for bringing you and Nathan back into this life.

 Flashback You were still unconscious when Sully takes care of your pretty nasty headwound. “It took a long time for them to get out of this game,” Victor spoke softly. “Huh?” Sam replied not knowing where he was going with it. “I realize it couldn’t be easy… all those years away. And I’m sorry for what happened to you. But it’s not their fault,” he continued while cleaning the dried blood from your face. Sam was confused, “You see a gun to their head? They chose this, okay. We are meant for this life.” Sullivan scoffed, “You really believe that?. “Why are you here, Victor?” Sam asked. “Because somebody’s gotta keep an eye out for them.”

 Everything is blurry when you open your eyes. You questioned how you got in bed, or how you got in these clothes. Your muscles felt weak, just like your energy. Aside from your own breath, there is nothing to be heard and the room is too dark to see much at all. Where is everyone? The last thing you remember is sliding down the slope towards the plane, and the freezing water. Everything after that is gone. Your head throbbed, feeling like you had taken a knife to the skull. Slowly you lift your hands to your forehead and graze the stitches. “That is definitely Sullivan’s handy work,” you mumble. Carefully you sit up, swinging your legs off the bed. Still a bit unsteady you shuffle to the door. You walked down the hall, looking through a couple rooms until you spot Sam’s denim jacket. “That’s his jacket, but where is he?” you whisper walking on to the next door. “Oh, bathroom. Just what I need.”

Without making too much noise you open the door, but the view in front of you made you gasp; Sam was taking a shower, washing the last signs from the nightmare off his body. You could have turned around, but quietly you undress and step in the shower behind Sam. He didn’t hear you over the running water. Gently you wrap your arms around him, leaving a kiss on his back. He opened his eyes and turns around to face you. “Hey, you scared me,” he chuckles, wrapping his arms around you and pressing a kiss on your head. “What happened?” you ask looking into his hazel eyes. “You almost drowned, Y/N/N. One moment you were behind me, and the next you were gone. Nathan had to use CPR on you.” You were shocked - your brain stuttered for a moment, while every part of you goes on pause and the thoughts catch up. Sam noticed and pulled you closer again, so your head could rest on his chest. The water pours down and drips down your side as you relax into his arms. After half an hour you step out of the shower and walk back to your bedroom. A few extra hours of sleep were welcome, because at noon you would take off to your next destination. Sam was exhausted, but with your body next to him it was easier to relax and eventually fall asleep.

 The next day The map in Scotland led you to King’s Bay in Madagascar. All the recruits that were looking for Avery’s Paradise centuries ago left with a coin after completing the trial, and Nathan figured out that the coin was holding the next clue.  “So… with our luck, what are the odds this volcano is going to erupt on us?” Nate asked. “Zero. It’s extinct. Trust me, that’s the first thing I looked up when you said we were heading for a volcano. Well, that and where to rent the cheapest 4x4,” Sully answered. “Wait, Sully… you’re telling me that you actually did some research?” you asked with a huge smile on your face. “Can’t let you be the know-it-all every time, kid” he replied with a wink.

 Nadine’s men were already searching the area inch by inch when you arrived. They had found an old colony outpost, but it was the wrong one. The four of you took out the military types at the old fort and were heading further up the mountain. The view was spectacular, like you were at one of those locations on a postcard, but the way up was muddy and wobbly. Luckily, Nathan convinced Sully to rent a jeep with a winch. Carefully you drove on and arrived at an old ruin with a drawbridge. “Well, it would appear we got here first,” Nate said. “Let’s check the place out and keep moving,” Sam replied. “What do you make of the drawbridge, Nathan?” he asked. “A little out of place. But you don’t put up a drawbridge unless you are trying to hide something.” The stairs to the crank of the drawbridge was busted, so you had to find another way to lower the medieval mechanism. Nate climbed up the tower, and you, Sam and Sully checked out the ruins. “I just keep waiting to wake up and find myself in solitary or something,” Sam spoke softly. “It’s all some kind of dream.” “Sam, I… I’m still struggling too. It’s normal, you know. I wake up in the middle of the night, just to check if you are really here. That it’s not some kind of twisted dream. Fifteen years ago I lost you. I lost everything. And now… there is so much to talk about, but I just don’t know where to start… how to start,” you told him. “My heart is still yours. And that will never change. I love you, Sam. And I hope… I really hope you still feel the same.” Sam stepped closer and cupped your face, “Babe, I’ve been wishing to hold you in my arms all these damned years. Fuck. I wanted to see you, hug you, kiss you, make you smile and make you laugh. Lie on the sofa next to you and fall asleep with you beside me. I love you too. Don’t you ever forget that.” Suddenly you heard Nathan, “Hey guys, there’s a massive tower just past the drawbridge. Biggest one yet.” He was on top of the tower and standing behind a crate. “Sam! Special delivery!” he yelled as he pushed the crate down and got pulled down with it. “Whooaa! Whoa, whoa, whoa!” he screamed before crashing down on the building. “Hey kid, you all right?” Sully asked as you run over to the younger Drake. “I’m fine,” he replied. “Thank god,” you said grabbing his arm. “But uh… maybe you can use this crate to get to the crank,” you continued. He climbed on top of it and jumped towards the higher level. “You three just relax, I got this,” he joked reaching for the wheel. The drawbridge was half way when Sully told Nate to stop immediately, “Stop, stop! Shoreline coming! Guys, hide!” Sam pulled you with him behind the abandoned structure, and Sully ran towards the tower. Quickly you pull out your gun and move closer to the side of the ruin so you had a clear view. “Ah, these clowns are really getting on my nerves,” you whispered. “No shit,” Sam answered almost inaudible. With caution you and Sam creep up to the car and take out a few mercenaries, as Nathan and Sully take down the ones near the tower. “Hey! Let’s go before more Shoreliners show up!” Sullivan shouted running for the car. “All right… now… let’s get that bridge down,” Nathan responded making his way to the crank.

 When you arrive at the tower you notice that the entranced is blocked. You had to find another way to get in and claim Avery’s treasure. With the help of some explosives and grenades you get inside a small building in front of the tower. “Time to see what’s inside,” Nate exclaimed. You ran down a spiral staircase and come upon a large hall, just like the one in the Scottish cathedral. Again there is a Saint Dismas statue, but this time its surrounded by multiple sigils. “There’s our boy Avery. Thomas Tew. And that’s, um…” Sam continued, “That’s Adam Baldridge. That’s Joseph Farrell, and that’s Richard Want.” “Hm. Pirate captains,” Nathan replied. “I don’t think your pirate pool theory wasn’t so ridiculous after all,” you observed. “All right, so uh… Let’s see, what do you think the trick is here? You gotta push a button, pull something?” Nate asked. You walk back over to Sullivan to get a better view of the wall and start to chuckle. “You see what I see, Sully?” “Darling, I think we got ourselves a map,” he replied with a smile. “Boys. Whenever you’re done fondling poor Saint Dismas, I think you might want to come take a look at this... The trapezoid is obviously the volcano. The crown, that’s King’s Bay,” he explained. “Victor, you’re a goddamn genius,” Sam responded as you walk back to statue again. “Look, this tower lines up with Avery’s sigil. So, the other sigils must be the towers from Avery’s time. Our treasure must be in one of them, right?” you remark. “Yeah, but which one? I count twelve towers,” Sullivan asked. You didn’t get the time to figure that out as an explosion crumbles down the roof of the hall. “Ah, shit!” Sam calls out. “It’s an ambush!”

 After taking down the last of the Shoreline mercenaries you walk back to the statue. Sam was crouching over one of the bodies. “Shit! Look at this,” he uttered holding up a map with markings on it. “They figured out the towers too. Locations, sigils, the works.” “So now what?” Sully asked. “Now we’re screwed. Okay, because there’s four of us. And there’s God knows how many of them? And they have a  head start.” Sam said with anger in his voice. “Yeah, but they don’t know which tower to go to yet,” Nate stated walking over to you. “That’s great, Nathan, cause neither do we,” Sam replied. “Yes we do,” you state as you hold up the coin and point towards the sigil with the scale. “Are you sure? Because I mean it could be this one, too” Sam said pointing to the sigil with the trident. “Crap!” Nathan scoffed. “But still… two beats the hell out of twelve,” Sullivan added.

Tag list: @kiara-arts​ @wintermuteway​

[thebigladjake]

AX3001: Oddyssey - TV Show Research and Development: Giygas and the Intrigue of having an unexplainable villain

When it came to making a TV Show, I always had an idea for an Earthbound spiritual successor since 2018 and over this last Summer when we were briefed to make three TV Shows. I had to really think about what ideas I wanted to do. However, during my downtime, I suddenly remembered one specific thing about my Earthbound experience...

Giygas

The Embodiment of Evil, the Universal Cosmic Destroyer or the Almighty Idiot according to who you ask, Giygas is the main antagonist of Earthbound and appropriately serves as the game’s final boss before your adventure comes to a close. Granted, him being the very last thing you fight leads to you leaving with that boss fresh on your mind. But, I hadn’t played Earthbound for a few years... And Giygas just suddenly popped into my head. And a lot of the questions were “Why is he like this? This cute and friendly game has a boss that looks like a nightmare?” I was absolutely fascinated by this boss and it led to my second playthrough of the game.

Onett, the start of the Adventure

This is the hometown of our main character, Ness and effectively our window into the world of this game. We see the town he lives in, it’s so bright and colourful with all the town essentials! A burger shop, a town hall, an arcade, hospital, police station and library, it’s familiar to us as our hometowns most likely have similar locations. The vibrant colours of all the buildings is eye-catching and welcoming! 

The music is also worth noting as it’s very peppy and upbeat, it feels like the theme of a small town with a nice community. Most of the music follows this formula.

Most of the towns in the game follow this design and it does feel like you’re exploring more and more of the world, like you’ve ventured further than you have ever gone before and you’re not going to stop because this world is so interesting and welcoming!

Some towns deviate from the formula, but the good people in the towns help to established the same welcoming energy that we’re used to.

Now, let’s take a look at the final map before Giygas’ lair...

The Cave of the Past, the end of the Adventure

Complete contrast to what has been established this entire game. There are absolutely no colours, there are no buildings, no operations of Giygas’ in the background. It’s just a path to the end of the journey and it’s so simple... But, it’s super effective! The lack of colour helps to make it feel otherworldly, makes it feel alien to the world that you’re used to and that’s exactly what Giygas is, he’s not from the world. 

Even our main cast of heroes could not be transported back in time without being transferred into robot bodies, all of their colour is gone too. All except Ness’ hat, showing a small bit of colour almost as if it’s that one bit of hope of beating Giygas.

At the end of games, usually going to the final boss’ lair will be some huge event where you see all of their plans, what they’ve built over time and will be accompanied by some epic score. Earthbound does things differently.

Just give that a listen, it’s a eerie, droning piece that doesn’t sound like a great confrontation theme. It sounds like ambience more than a score to me and I think that makes it scarier, like you are in the positions of the kids who are probably incredibly scared of what they are going to have to face once inside that cave. It’s so incredible and it’s a sample of the Beach Boys song, ‘Deirdre’.

It’s the opening note and I find it amazing how a single sample can do so much! There is another Earthbound track that I will link here which features a sample of the trumpet in the intro of the Beatles song, ‘All you need is Love’ and again, it sets up so much with just a tiny little sample.

This is used just before going to the Cave of the Past, instead being the Cave of the Present. It’s technically just two notes with a reverb, but the sample adds so much and it just feels uncomfortable. However, we don’t need to talk about this for long, let’s go right to Giygas’ lair!

Giygas Lair, the true contrast to Earthbound’s style!

I apologise for the size of the image, but it’s pretty much a straight path but LOOK AT THIS! A trail of organs and entrails twisting and turning through this dark void until you find this uncanny monstrosity of a machine made of the same organic material you were walking on. This. This is what made me come back, it’s such a disturbing idea. 

This is open to interpretation, but the way caves are represented in Earthbound is to only make sprites of the ground and walls. All the stuff you can’t see is black, just like how a cave should be. Giygas’ lair has this same motif, but there doesn’t really appear to be any walls around. So depending on your view, they’re either walking through a tunnel or entrails or walking through the void as previously stated. Personally, I think both are terrifically terrifying but I definitely see the void more.

The organs pulse as you walk up them, the only noise complimenting the atmosphere is the clanking of robo-feet and the breathing of Giygas which is what I feel gives it the whole void feeling. It’s so unnerving that this is the final confrontation, but the fact that it is actually puts us in Ness and his friends shoes.

Getting to the Machine causes everything to stop, the ambience vanishes. Giygas’ intro music plays as the Machine changes to show the robots a picture of Ness’ face. Ness was prophesied to be the one who brings down Giygas and the first thing we see from the Machine is Ness, already suggesting to us that Giygas knows that we’re here...

Pokey, Ness’ childhood friend and eventual enemy over the course of the game, descends in a Spider Mech and just like that the Final Battle is about to begin!

The Final Fight

Of course, the final boss begins with Pokey standing before you with Giygas’ number one thought right now... Ness is here and he’s come to defeat me. This is a pretty standard affair for a boss, only Pokey can be harmed and he is much more a threat in this Spider Mech than he was previously in battle. 

Giygas has a shield that is impervious to any kind of physical or psychic attacks and cannot be destroyed or disabled. He attacks using the special power that only Ness knows ‘PSI Rockin’’. His shield will always reflect your shots back at the character who attacks him and even when they have shield themselves, they will get hit regardless. The Machine is what keeps Giygas stable and alive, making him completely invincible...

However... He has one big idiot on his side...

Pokey can be damaged and the strategy of the fight is to focus on him and avoid any attacks that hit the both of them. Pokey, like the main cast, is a kid and he’s incredibly immature. So as soon as his mech is defeated, he taunts the main gang and turns off the Devil’s Machine... The one thing preventing Giygas’ defeat...

Giygas Released

Once released, Pokey explains that Giygas isn’t even himself anymore. He became so powerful that his body was destroyed and had to be contained into a machine in order to maintain some sort of grasp on his thoughts. Without that machine, the four heroes are taken into a dimension of Giygas’ thoughts and since we play as Ness we hear his thoughts directed towards us the player.

He reaches out with such thoughts as repeating Ness’ (The player’s) name, saying “I feel... Sad.” or “It feels good.” and added upon these thoughts Giygas’ attacks cannot be comprehended by our characters. It really helps to add a sense of hopelessness because we have no idea what is truly going on and we can’t fight what we don’t know. 

An Unconventional Resolution

Attacks don’t work, defending won’t work either, you can’t heal or save yourself. All hopes seem lost until you notice a certain act that Paula can do. Pray.

When Paula prays, she reaches out to the world she left behind and the folks that are waiting for their return get the feeling that something bad is happening. So, they too pray from the bottom of their hearts...

https://youtu.be/cptFVD3eTEs?start=320&end=374

If you watch the small clip above, once he feels the support from the Earth. The sound cue to signify that Giygas has been damaged and that Giygas is not okay.

Onward to his next form.

Now I would like you to take a close look at this image, I’ve asked a few people about this and sometimes they get it without me saying anything and others don’t. So, just take a moment to find an image amongst the Giygas’.

Got it or have you given up? In the realm of Giygas, here in the black void is a pretty damn distinct shape of a baby. And this is what fascinated me about Giygas, there is a theory that this is symbolism for abortion as you go back in time to kill Giygas but that theory has been disproven by Shigesato Itoi, the game’s creator. There’s evidence that goes against this theory anyway, but this fetus imagery always stuck out to me. 

It’s said to be a coincidence that the Super Nintendo generated these sprites and in this pattern. But, it’s such a definite shape of a baby and I find it absolutely mental that it’s just a coincidence. And that curiosity is what brought me back to Earthbound, just this happy go lucky game where you make friends with a little monkey that chews bubblegum, make friends with a man who converts himself into a huge dungeon man and at the very end, you’re faced with this. 

It’s not only impactful imagewise, but storywise it’s just as impactful for the opposite reasons. As Giygas can now be damaged by feeling the love and support coming from the friends Ness has made across the world. Each time Giygas is hit, it gets worse, but the moment he really breaks down is when Ness’ Mother wakes up in the middle of the night and rushes downstairs with Ness’ little sister and their dog. They all feel uneasy and begin to pray for the safety of Ness and his friends.

https://youtu.be/cptFVD3eTEs?start=702&end=738

This is the moment Giygas truly breaks down, feeling the support of a loving Mother looking out for her son is a feeling he had long since buried. It’s about time I talk about the backstory of Giygas, while it’s not touched upon in Earthbound/Mother 2, in Earthbound Beginnings/Mother we see Giygas as an alien and we learn about how he came to be.

Giygas and Trauma

Giygas was an alien that was raised by Maria and George, a couple that was abducted by the other members of Giygas’ race. Maria adopted Giygas and looked after him while George studied their powers without their approval and eventually escaped with this knowledge, never being seen again. Once Giygas grows up, he was instructed to ensure that no human is capable of using PSI powers and not wanting to betray the people who raised him, he forcefully detached himself from Maria to prepare for the invasion.

Maria was sent back to Earth, but with amnesia and once the Eight Melodies are obtained, she regains her memory and explains that it was a song she used to sing to Giygas when he was young. This is very important.

Giygas’ first attempt to take over the world. He comes down, looking upon the gang and the battle begins. Starting the trend of Mother/Earthbound games having a unusual way of defeating the final boss. This time, the group begins to sing the Eight Melodies which brings up emotions in Giygas that he thought he had long since repressed or even got over. Giygas has a complete mental breakdown and recalls his forces, swearing revenge on the planet and that he will return.

In Earthbound, Giygas has worked on himself and made sure that what brought him down before cannot bring him down again. However, he didn’t do enough since the feeling of a loving Mother reaching out to her son in his time of need still hurts him severely and it’s at this point where Giygas can hardly do anything. His sprite starts contorting, the colours shift and the audio turns into a droning whirring noise.

Ness’ Mothers love is one thing, but it’s not enough. Giygas is wounded, but he is still fighting. Paula keeps praying for one more person and with a few more attempts, that person is you. There’s a moment in the game where the fourth wall is broken and asks you to enter your name. It can even be your full name, my name is pretty long and my name fits into it perfectly. It’s emotionally engaging since it includes you and you feel like in a way you are defeating him rather than Giygas being defeated by the world of the game. 

https://youtu.be/cptFVD3eTEs?start=838&end=938

After this Giygas loses control, the whirring increases, his sprite distorts further to the point where he is unrecognisable, the visuals cutting in with static occassionally. Static that appears at the very beginning of the game, suggesting the approach of Giygas and showing pictures of the invasion, and at the end of the game it suggest that he’s retreating, he’s getting out of reach and eventually he is gone.

And after all of that craziness, the robots are outside of Giygas’ lair. Everything is quiet, “The War against Giygas is over.”

What was Shigesato Itoi thinking?

Shigesato Itoi drew inspiration from an event of his childhood, where he had walked into the wrong screen at the theatre. He walked in on a murder scene which as a kid he mistook for a rape scene which had such a potent effect on him. He drew inspiration from it for Giygas’ final battle and some of the things Giygas says. 

In an interview, Itoi claims that there was a scene where a guy grabbed a woman’s breast which distorted it into a ball shape. He said “It all hit me really hard. It was a direct attack on my brain.” despite the fact that this doesn’t actually happen in the movie, which Itoi admits that his memories are a little fuzzy. It’s probably because it all happened so fast and his child brain may have created false memories or just failed to understand it. Itoi also goes onto say, "this sense of terror having atrocity and eroticism side-by-side, and that’s what Giygas's lines at the end are. During the end, he says, “It hurts,” right? That's... her breast. It’s like, how do I put it, a “living-being” sensation." and the purpose of the scene is to get the player’s mind working.

Another interesting part of this interview is when Itoi talks about typical villains and says this, “Well, you know, having a villain there who simply goes, “Wahahaha!” and the like would clearly be bad. But, actually, when I think about it, having villains go, “Wahahaha!” is a really intriguing pattern. But there’s no point in wondering all by yourself for days on end what it means for a bad guy to go, “Wahahaha!” at the climax of a game, you know? I get the feeling that there aren’t many people in the game industry who would do that sort of thing, though.” Which is something important to consider, Earthbound is such a colourful game bursting with personality, so having it end with just a standard final boss affair probably wouldn’t feel satisfying.

What the Earthbound/Mother series taught me about final confrontations?

Giygas’ character and what it taught me that even “Universal Cosmic Destroyers” can have trauma that they are trying to avoid and bury. It humanises them in a way and it can make the final confrontation that more powerful as it’s a problem we can all relate to. They’re not all evil for the sake of being evil, sometimes they don’t have a choice. 

I think this is a good thing to take on board and I have already begun planning on my main antagonist’s motivations on Oddyssey. It might be changed since it’s a sensitive topic for me right now, but these motivations won’t be brought up in Season 1 anyway

[captain-s-rogers]

Have A Little Faith In Me

(gif credit to the creator)

Part One

Master List Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC // Clint Barton x OFC Word Count: 1,900 Warnings: none? A/N: Debuting for OC Day 2020! Here’s the first part of the rewrite of my first ever Marvel series! If you want to be added to my tag list please let me know! Feedback is cool :)

Rockefeller PR firm. Though not connected to the famed family by any means, legend had it the J.D. Rockefeller himself had hired the founding members to handle his public relations in the very early success of the family. As a show of gratitude, in addition to a substantial cash and client flow, Mr. Rockefeller had allowed the firm to use the family’s prosperous name.

Anyone who was anyone in New York City knew of and often employed Rockefeller PR. The firm put on benefit events like they were going out of style, constantly hosting galas and banquets for one charity or another. Of course, with the guest lists for the events most often restricted to Manhattan’s elite, the donations poured in left and right. The firm had reached their renowned status as the most profitable and most charitable over the years. 

In more recent years, Sophia Hawkins and Lucy Cleveland had made names for themselves as the firm’s most successful representatives. That success had given the clout they needed to swing an event entirely different from anything the firm had done in a long time -- possibly ever. 

For starters, this event wasn’t being held to raise funds for an art gallery or secure investors for a corporation. This event was being held to raise funds to donate to several different organizations that supported the US troops and veterans. Not to mention, the event was made open to the public -- another component which had never been a part of a Rockefeller PR event. The thing was 1940s USO; everyone who showed up to attend the event was required to dress accordingly and make a donation at the door, in addition to their purchased ticket, of course

Both Sophia’s and Lucy’s grandfathers had fought in World War II, which had been Sophia’s inspiration for the idea. The firm’s executives hadn’t been keen on the idea when the two women first presented it, but between the excellent publicity that would come from supporting the troops and veterans, and the girls’ track record of successful events, convincing them to endorse the event hadn’t taken but a few minutes.  

The night of the benefit arrived, with a line forming out the door a couple of hours before the designated start time. Sophia and Lucy were dressed to the nines, double checking that everything -- from the menu to the music -- was in order. The servers were dressing in period-appropriate waiter and waitress uniforms, and the trio of women singing were emulating a 1940s singing group to a T. While the musical act ran through their era-specific setlist, Sophia and Lucy shined up the finishing touches on the decor. 

“Soph!” Lucy called out across the banquet hall, “do we need to alter the table settings? Caitlyn still has place cards for high-profile clients set out.” 

“We can just toss the cards, since there’s no guest list and we’re closing the doors as max capacity,” Sophia replied, already plucking name cards from a nearby table. 

“Do we have enough food?” Lucy continued. 

“We’ve got the chefs cooking for one-hundred-fifty and there’s one-hundred seats. I think we’re okay,” Sophia smiled. “Calm down, Luce. Everything is going according to plan. Nobody can plan like we can.”

Finally, Lucy was able to calm down. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right.” 

The women smiled at each other; everything was going to be perfect. Despite Lucy’s worries, they were well aware that this had been one of the smoothest events they had ever planned. Not having to please a bunch of snobby clients made the process a breeze. 

With only a few minutes to go, Sophia and Lucy decided they were happy with the state of things. After a short breather, they told the doorman to begin letting guests in the hall. 

Manhattan’s elite mingled with some lesser known citizens, filling the room and milling about the dance floor with freshly served drinks. The two event planners flitted about, adjusting table placements as necessary, making sure the food and drinks stayed well-stocked. The turnout was set to be huge, and within ten minutes of the doors opening, the hall was filled to capacity. 

Once everyone had found their seat, Sophia made a brief yet spectacular speech welcoming everyone and thanking them for their donations -- with the total amount to be named later in the evening -- the musical act took to the stage. Drinks continued to flow, the appetizers were served, and the nostalgia of the songs pulled a few couples to the dance floor. Sophia and Lucy stood at the back of the room, admiring their handiwork. 

“Ya know, Soph, I think we did a good job with this one,” Lucy mused, accepting a martini from the bartender.

“I think you’re right,” Sophia agreed. She sipped wine from the glass in her hand and took another cursory glance over the room, ever vigilant for any little thing that might go wrong. 

“Everyone seems to be having a good time,” Lucy added. “And, speaking of a good time, I do believe that gentleman in the corner is eyeing you. He has been all night.”

Sophia choked her drink. “You’re kidding, right? Lucy, tonight is not the night for your games, friend.”

“I’m not playing games,” Lucy laughed. “See, over by the band? Tall, blond. Might have to call the doctor, since he’s been nursing that beer for over an hour. But, yes, friend, he keeps glancing over at you.”

“I think you’re full of shit,” Sophia mumbled, though she looked somewhat hopeful as she threw a casual glance in the direction Lucy had indicated. She locked eyes with the man Lucy had nodded toward. 

“Still think I’m full of shit?”  

Sophia scoffed, shaking her head before she downed the rest of her wine and set the glass on the bar. Yes, she had been hopeful seconds ago, but this man was beyond handsome -- and she was on the clock, to boot. 

“Go, talk to him!” Lucy urged.

“Not a chance, Luce. We’re working, remember?” 

Before Lucy could come up with a suitable response to change her friend’s mind, the man in question started towards the two women. When he was close enough for them to see he was, for certain, headed in their direction, Lucy whispered a quick ‘good luck’ in Sophia’s ear, then made herself busy checking on the status of supper.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” the man began, “but are you Sophia Hawkins?”

Sophia nodded. “I am. Can I help you with something?

“I’m Steve Rogers,” he introduced, extending a hand. When Sophia slipped her hand into his for a confident but cautious handshake, he continued.  “I wanted to thank you for coordinating this event. It’s a great cause, and I’m very impressed with the level of authenticity.”

Sophia faltered for a moment, running through her mental files so could explain the familiarity of his name. She recovered quickly, pasting a polite, professional smile on her face. 

“We did our best to make it as authentic as possible. My grandfather and great uncle were in World War II, and my co-planner, Lucy’s grandfather was in the war, as well. We were able to find a lot of photographic evidence to go off of.”

Steve hesitated, casting an uneasy glance at the ground before meeting her eyes again. “Yeah, my grandfather was in the war, too. I think he would appreciate how well you pulled it all off.”

“Why, thank you,” she smiled. They stood in silence for a moment, and Sophia noticed the authentic detail of the Army uniform Steve was wearing -- even with the best costume designers, nothing they had provided for the waitstaff or singers was this authentic. The longer she looked, the more familiar the uniform seemed. 

Steve met her eyes. “Everything all right?”

Sophia nodded and quickly dismissed the strange familiarity as something she had seen in her own family’s photos. “Is the uniform your grandfather’s?”

Again, Steve hesitated, almost as though he was looking for the right words to answer an otherwise easy question. “It was. Found it in my mother’s attic before the event. Since time-period attire was required, seemed like the uniform was the way to go.”

“It suits you,” Sophia smiled. She turned away for a moment to ask the bartender for another glass of wine. 

Steve quickly took a sip of his beer while he waited for her to return to their conversation. He looked around the room, catching sight of the dance floor; a warm blush creeped over his cheeks and down his neck. The tempo had changed from upbeat and quick to slow and steady. A surge of confidence swelled in his chest, pushing him to act on impulse. Steve finished off his beer and set the bottle on the counter, then extended his hand to Sophia again. 

“Forgive me if I’m out of line, but would you like to dance, Ms. Hawkins?” Steve asked.

Sophia’s blush matched his as she turned to set the wine glass on the bar. She accepted Steve’s hand. “Call me Sophia, and I’d love to dance.”

The couple eased into a simple waltz as the music began to build from the first verse into the bridge of the song. They danced in silence through the chorus, concentrating on the steps before changing focus to each other. 

“You told me about your family, but what made you decide to do an event open to the public? I’ve been told your firm generally caters Manhattan’s high-status citizens.”

“We do, you’re right,” Sophia confirmed. “Lucy and I have done so many of those, we wanted to do something different. We were looking through old family photos together one night, just for fun, and the idea to do a benefit for the military came to us. The USO theme followed.”

“I don’t want to sound like a broken record,” Steve smiled, “but you did a really fantastic job.”

Sophia showed her appreciation for his compliment with a modest smile. When the song ended, though she was reluctant to do so, she thanked Steve for the dance and turned to return to the bar.

“Sophia?” he called, gently grabbing her wrist to keep her from getting too far..

She turned to face him, brows raised in question. “Mm?”

“Would you want to get dinner some time? Maybe get to know each other better. Sometime when you’re not working.” 

Sophia didn’t bother to stop the ear-to-ear grin that spread over her face. “I would love that.” 

A pen was handy in the pocket of her dress, since she was, in fact, working. She took Steve’s hand again and jotted her number across his palm. She clicked the pen before putting it back in her pocket. 

“I’ll call you in a few days,” Steve promised. “We’ll work out the details.”

“Sounds good.” Sophia nodded and winked at him. She turned to walk away, this time looking over her shoulder to add, “Thanks for the dance, Captain.”

He froze for a moment, fearing that Sophia was aware of his full identity. Her eyes glanced to the patches on his jacket before she turned away from him; that had been what tipped her off to the rank. When she was back at the bar and conversing with her friend, Steve looked down at the phone number written across his palm. With a suppressed but victorious smile, he worked his way back into the crowd.

@arrowsandmixtapes​ @the-murder-strut-murdered-me​ @growningupgeek​ @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan​ @captain-rogers-beard​ @kitkatd7​ @patzammit​ @sagechanoafterdark​ @what-is-your-plan-today​

[sage-nebula]

why didn't you like steven universe future? not mad, just wondering

I didn’t like it for … quite a few reasons. Fair warning that this is probably going to be long, it’s going to contain spoilers for Future, and those who really liked Future for whatever reason are probably not going to agree with me. And that’s fine! But I do ask that if you disagree that you don’t try to start a fight over it. That would be a waste of everyone’s time, including yours, because I’m going to be thirty in twelve days and so I really don’t have the time or energy to get into heated fights with people over children’s cartoons anymore. I’m well past that stage of my life. (Also keep in mind that while I’m very critical of Future, I really like the original series, which is why I’m critical of Future. So if there’s any confusion, let me clear it up now: I am not in the “SU crit” crowd.)

So with that said …

My first issue with Future is with its format, and particularly the issues that it had with character balance. In the original show, while there were obviously some characters who were relegated to side character status and thus didn’t get as much attention as other characters did (e.g. Lapis Lazuli, Peridot, Lars, et cetera), we still had a sensible mix of characters in each episode, there not only to contribute to the plot, but also to bounce off each other. If it was a townie episode, you’d probably see a good mix of human characters interacting with Steven. If it was a Crystal Gems episode, in most cases all of the gems would show up at some point or another, and so on. Characters who had established relationships with each other often showed up with and interacted with each other (e.g. Lapis and Peridot, however you want to interpret their relationship). It felt natural for this to happen. It made sense for all the characters involved for everyone to get focus, for the episodes to not be centered on One Character and One Character Only.

And Future … didn’t do that.

Particularly notable and bad in the latter half of Future, Future’s episodes tended to focus on Steven + One Other Character. “Guidance” was Amethyst’s episode, so Amethyst was the only person Steven interacted with at length. “Volleyball” was Pearl’s episode, so Pearl (and Pink Pearl) was the only character Steven acted with at length, and so on. In a particularly egregious example, and the one that really made me notice the problem, “In Dreams” was Peridot’s episode, and so Lapis was not seen nor mentioned despite loving Camp Pining Hearts so much that she rewatched all the seasons with Peridot, made a meep morp specifically due to her love for the show (e.g. she made fanart!), and in the comics has an entire issue where she and Peridot not only put on a Camp Pining Hearts play, but where Lapis shows that she’s memorized the show’s dialogue and even does impressions for Peridot. Yet although Lapis is such a passionate and devoted fan of the show—although their mutual love for the show was something that helped Lapis and Peridot bond—she apparently has no interest in watching the reboot. Or if she does, we don’t get to hear about it, because again, she isn’t mentioned at all because “In Dreams” was meant to be Peridot’s episode.

Now, a disclaimer: I do ship Lapidot. I think I’ve made that pretty clear before. But the fact that I ship Lapidot isn’t why I’m annoyed that “In Dreams” was only allowed to have one (1) character besides Steven, and thus Lapis was excluded. I’m annoyed because it makes zero sense given things about Lapis’ character that were established in the previous series and supplementary materials. Lapis loves Camp Pining Hearts. Therefore, Lapis should at least have an opinion on the reboot, even if it’s only Peridot saying that Lapis wants a full report on the reboot to know whether it’s worth watching or not. The fact that she isn’t mentioned at all distracted me, because I spent the episode wondering why she wasn’t being included in a watch party for a show she loved so much she made fanart for it and memorized the dialogue to impersonate the characters.

And as I said, this is far from the only episode where this happens. Each non-Steven character seemed to get one, and only one, episode where they were Steven’s Plus One, and therefore were either inexplicably missing from other episodes, or only had brief cameos at best. It took until episode 12, “Bismuth Casual”, for Connie to have an appearance for more than a few seconds, and even then, she was mostly only there to show how awkward Steven was interacting with humans (since apparently all those townie eps we sat through in the original series meant nothing in the end), because “Bismuth Casual” was Bismuth’s episode, and thus the only one she had a real appearance in. In “Together Forever”, we were given a half-assed excuse for why Garnet didn’t stop Steven from getting his heart broken (”you would have done it anyway”) because a.) having Garnet give Steven good advice might have ruined the “plot” and b.) it wasn’t her episode, so they didn’t want to give her real focus. As a result of wanting to keep the Steven + One Other format, they sacrificed characterization and narrative cohesion by excluding characters that it would have made more sense to include. It was distracting, and it didn’t work for me at all.

Now, you might be wondering: why did they do this? Was it really necessary to do things this way to focus on how awful Steven’s mental state was? Well, no — but that’s not why they did it. Rebecca Sugar revealed why she chose to write Future this way in an interview after it ended:

“… There was a lot about the story that the initial run of episodes had told that I wanted to recontextualize because I think that people […] really put a lot of their focus on—not unlike Steven himself in the character—put a lot of focus on the Gems’ stories that were going on when really as a team we were always very interested in his human story.”

To paraphrase: Rebecca Sugar was upset that people were more interested in the Gems rather than Steven, and as such she cut them out of Future as much as possible to put the maximum amount of focus on Steven and his issues so that we could learn to appreciate Steven instead.

And this … does not work for me. 

First and foremost: You cannot force your audience to like or be invested in a character. You just can’t. In fact, trying to do that often results in the opposite effect; the more you try to shoehorn audience focus and love onto one particular character, especially at the cost of other characters, the more the audience tends to dislike them. I believe the term that TV Tropes uses for this is “The Westly”, or “The Scrappy”, named after characters that, well, became disliked because of how the creators tried to force the audience to like them. It’s perfectly fine, as a writer, to want your audience to focus on a particular character or story point that you think is cool, and it’s perfectly valid to be disappointed when they don’t. But when you create a sequel series specifically to … punish, for lack of a better word, your audience for, say, taking comfort in how good of a parent Greg was to Steven, or for caring deeply and being invested in the plight of the Gems and all they went through in their past instead of being focused on the child character who, in a lot of ways, acted as the audience surrogate … a.) it’s not going to work, and b.) you’ve lost a lot of my respect (not that you care, because you don’t know me), from one writer to another.

But on a more personal level, this doesn’t resonate with me because I never did care about Steven that much, in honesty. In fact, to be the most honest, part of the reason why I put off watching Steven Universe for so long is because Steven’s bratty behavior in the early episodes annoyed me to no end. I was so frustrated by the fact that this bratty, annoying little boy somehow had all the answers that these strong, brave, very competent women around him just somehow couldn’t see or have themselves. When I did start watching, I watched solely for the Gems. I did come to like Steven over time as character development set in and matured, but even so I was never personally invested in him or his story. I always liked side characters more. Even when it came to the humans, I preferred characters like Greg, Connie, and Lars to Steven himself. (And yes, Lars was a huge jerk at first, but this wasn’t treated like an acceptable thing like Steven’s often bratty behavior, which is why it was palatable to me. Also, yes, Steven was a child and so was allowed to be bratty, but that doesn’t mean that I have to like him as a character even if I acknowledge that his behavior is in-character for a thirteen-year-old who has the maturity of an eight-year-old.) So to have Future focus entirely on Steven and his woes, and especially in a way that clashed hard with some of my own lived experiences and values (tl;dr: as a survivor of parental abuse, I would have killed to have a parent as loving and supportive as Greg, so Steven lashing out at him really did not sit well with me at all) really put me off Future and Steven as a character. Rebecca wanted me (and by me I mean “as a person in the audience”, not me in specific) to focus more on and appreciate Steven, but her writing in Future actually did the opposite. It took a character I grew to like and made me dislike him again.

And on that note, Steven himself. In the Gizmodo interview mentioned above, Rebecca talks about how she believes the audience took what Steven was going through for granted (which I don’t think is very true at all given fan discussions and pleas for Steven to see a therapist even before the Future episodes started airing, but hey), but she also says that she wanted to focus on feelings of inadequacy, overwork, and learning that you deserve love because those were experiences she herself had while working on the original show, and so she wanted to explore those experiences through Future and chose Steven to do it. To quote:

“I learned that I just really needed to take care of myself and respect myself and believe that I deserved friends and love. When I started the show, all I cared about really was working. I was very proud to work myself into abysmal health, and I think a lot of people can relate to this, especially artists and people in animation. […] So a lot of what I ended up writing towards the end of the show was about the work that I was doing to try and build a foundation of self-respect that would just allow me to keep functioning at work. By the end, I think I really arrived somewhere that I’ve never been before, where I felt comfortable reaching out to people and saying, ‘Hey, do you want to hang out?’—something as simple as that without assuming that they wouldn’t want to spend time with me? Or little things, you know? Something as simple as putting down my pen and taking a bath just cause I wanted to, or taking a nap in the middle of the day—things I just didn’t feel I deserved before. That really became part of the arc of the show and a lot of what I ultimately wanted to write about in Future.”

Now, there are two things that I want to say first, before I continue:

The fact that Rebecca went through such a horrible time with her mental health, that she suffered as much as she did, and that the animation industry is an industry which promotes suffering like it does, is all heartbreaking, and I am so relieved to hear that she’s in a better place now, and I am goddamn proud of her for reaching that better place. I’m so proud of her for taking care of herself, I’m happy that she has better self-esteem. It’s awful that she had to suffer breakdowns to get there, but the fact is that she’s been working successfully on recovery and that is amazing.

Fiction is an incredible outlet and way for expressing what you’ve gone through in your life. Anyone who has ever written a story can tell you that they put some part of themselves and their lived experiences into what they write. The fact that Rebecca wanted to use a cartoon to share her experiences with mental illness and mental health recovery is perfectly valid and understandable. Not only can she create what she wants, but sometimes telling stories is the best way to express to others what you went through in a way that makes it easier for them to understand your experiences. I don’t condemn Rebecca for doing this at all.

With those things said, though … I really have to ask if Steven Universe was the correct fictional universe to do it in, and if it really worked for Steven Quartz Universe, the character.

The thing I loved most about the original show is that it was, in Rebecca Sugar’s own words, an idealist fantasy world where all conflicts could be solved by talking them out and that the tone was overwhelmingly optimistic. I started watching Steven Universe during a breakdown of my own, because I needed something soft and easy to digest that also had a ton of episodes (and by that point, Steven Universe did have a lot of episodes). Steven Universe didn’t have Reality Ensues moments, by and large. There were characters that had trauma (e.g. Lapis Lazuli), but although trauma was portrayed realistically (and in fact, as someone with complex post-traumatic stress disorder, a.k.a. C-PTSD, Lapis is one of the best portrayals of it that I’ve ever seen), for the most part the show always erred on the side of optimism. It wasn’t, “Things are bad, and now they’re getting worse, and now they’re getting worse, and now they’re getting worse” on and on for twenty episodes straight with no reprieve. Even when characters were in bad places that weren’t fixed by the end of an episode (e.g. Garnet and Pearl’s fight lasting several episodes, Lapis running away to the moon and then running away again when she couldn’t overcome her hypervigilance and anxiety), the tone of the show typically suggested that there was still hope for things to get better. It dipped the audience’s feet into the angst bucket, rather than grabbing them by their hair and waterboarding them with it.

But Future was so heavy on the angst that it was memetic to call it Steven Universe: Fear instead. Every single episode only seemed to make things worse. And while that is understandable in the sense that the show wanted to lead up to Steven’s emotional breakdown corrupting him (if that is indeed what happened; it’s still unclear), it’s jarring when you consider the original show’s tone wasn’t that dark and emphasized the importance of communication, rather than showing that the titular character, once known for employing Jesus no Jutsu (a.k.a. talking at problems until they’re no longer problems) to great effect now suddenly actively shunning communication as a means of conflict resolution. “Prickly Pair” is, in fact, a great example of how much of a departure Future was from its predecessor. Steven spends the episode having a conflict over how he feels that he can’t talk to the Gems because they’ll feel guilty for not being there for him, which, okay, I can buy that given that he was always acting as their counsel in the original series. The episode ends with Cactus Steven going on a rampage and attacking the Gems, Steven realizing that this happened because he vented to Cactus Steven about the Gems and didn’t show Cactus Steven love or affection, and the Gems (after Cactus Steven leaving) asking Steven if there’s anything he needs to talk about in a way that’s gentle and shows they want to listen to and help him. And Steven, having realized that this entire mess happened because he talked about the Gems rather than to them … decides to double down on not talking to them and instead bottle everything up instead.

See, in the original series, Steven would have realized that since Cactus Steven went on a rampage because Steven vented to it rather than talking to the Gems about the issues he had with them that what he should do instead is, you know, talk to the Gems and tell them how he feels, especially since they now already have a pretty good idea given that Cactus Steven regurgitated it all to them. This would have resulted in, perhaps not an instant-fix, but a definite road to communication and healing much, much earlier than the fifteen-odd episodes of things getting worse that we had to sit through after this episode aired. But because Future needed to build up to Steven having a breakdown, and because Rebecca wanted to write about her own experiences of bottling things up and pushing onward despite her worsening mental health, Steven didn’t learn the obvious lesson that he would have learned in the original series (hell, that he arguably already knew in the original series), and the Cactus Steven incident was literally never brought up or followed up on again in the episodes that followed, because the episodes that followed didn’t have a big focus on the main CGs. (Which, again, goes back to the format issues, because in the original series you better believe the main CGs would have followed up with Steven about that little incident rather than just apparently forgetting it ever happened.)

I’m not saying that it’s unrealistic for Steven to have trauma or issues due to everything he went through in the original series. What I am saying is that being so heavy-handed with showing those issues, plus having Steven do things that don’t necessarily align with previous characterization, feels a bit more like writing for the sake of a message rather than writing for the sake of character. I’m also saying that Future’s hyper-focus on showing just how Bad things were for Steven, as well as how Bad the Gems and Greg were at parenting, as well as the whole “Steven gets CORRUPTED, GASP” bit at the end, felt quite a bit like a fanfiction to me. And don’t get me wrong, I’m not knocking fanfiction—believe me, I’ve written a LOT of it in my day—but there is a reason why fanfiction is, well, fanfiction, rather than show canon. It’s fun to explore concepts such as Steven going darkside and shattering Jasper and trying to shatter White Diamond and then turning into a giant dinosaur, but is that really something that we want written down in the history of the show’s canon? Do we really want to make Steven Quartz Universe the only character in the show to outright murder someone on-screen, and then laugh about it later, and also never give the murdered character any sort of closure or conclusion to her own arc? Is that something better off in canon, rather than in the realm of fanfiction?

Hm.

All in all, I just feel that Future doesn’t jive with the original series in terms of content or tone. The episodes were entertaining enough, but overall it left a bad taste in my mouth. Given that the original series had a perfectly fine finale with “Change Your Mind”, I’ve decided to take that as the ending to Steven Universe, with the movie serving as the epilogue. Future is, to me, something optional. Rebecca wanted to explore her own experiences through the lens of the character she liked the most, and that’s fine. I’m happy that she got that out of her system. But Future didn’t work for me, I didn’t like it, and so I’m electing to ignore it, personally. I’m not going to include it the next time I rewatch the series. YMMV, and that’s fine! If you liked Future, I’m happy for you. But I didn’t, and this is why.

I hope that was a satisfying answer.

[dlkardenal]

A bit of worldbuilding

Hey there, traveler!

You may have noticed there’s been a lack of BtS posts over the past month. The main reason is that I’m a lazy fuck and just managed to escape the horrors of the end term exams, so I've been busy creating a million Skyrim characters and not doing anything remotely productive. We also had a huge update for our desert fantasy WIP Shackles of the Storm (or SotS), since through the power of Twitter we managed to find a professional editor that suits both our needs and our budget. Hooray! That means I’m trying to finish self-editing the book as soon as I can (without burning out), so that sucks up a lot of creative energy.

After all that bitching and excuses, what’s this post about?

Well, I thought I’d share some info about the marvelous world we created to see what you may plunge yourself into if you decide to read SotS. I’ve labeled each section according to interest (I hope), so you don’t have to suffer through parts that bore you to death before the good stuff. Here we go!

Also, mild spoiler warning. Nothing here tells anything about the story, only the world, but if you prefer to experience it as the novel unfolds, you might want to skip this one. For history nerds:

The first and most important country you’ll read about is the fractured desert empire that hosts most of the story-the Eight Provinces of Seiran. As you can guess from the name, it’s not really a solid, unified state, although it was some two thousand years before. The kingdom of Seiran was originally a wealthy and prosperous country with a mild continental climate until it was destroyed by a magical incident. This cataclysm manifested as a subterranean combustion that fractured the soil, burned the foliage and spelled the end of the current civilization. This era before the fall is remembered as the Old Garden by the survivors and most people longe for the lost prosperity.

After the fall, the remaining populace (called the seirs) formed eight sovereign princedoms around the remaining habitable lands. These became known as the Eight Provinces, and after a few hundred years of infighting, they formed the unstable alliance that makes up the country. These events mean a lot of things for modern-day seirs. First of all, they had a couple of generations to accommodate to their princes and independent nationality, which means there’s a lot of unspoken tension between the provinces. Second, they all carry with them the bitterness of those who lost something, even though none of the current denizens were alive when the Old Garden fell, not even their great-grandparents. This doesn’t stop them bitching about it though, and many believe a “New Garden” is coming if they do certain things or somehow redeem themselves. They are basically a nation trapped in the bargaining stage after a great loss.

For fantasy nerds:

The thing that sets Seiran apart from our world is magic, mainly two kinds. There are these people called ‘mejai’, the descendants of powerful magicians from an old era. They are capable of tapping into the invisible, untouchable force of magic that exists as a constant storm in another plane of existence. Mejai can invoke this storm, but even the mightiest of them isn’t able to control it. For practical use, they require Trinkets, relics of a magical nature that can withstand the power and create certain effects. One trinket is only capable of one effect, but the magnitude of it depends on the mejai’s power. Yes, there is a trinket that looks like a lamp, we couldn’t miss that shot. Mejais are rare, but depending on how strong they are they can pop up as street frauds or noblemen, so both end of the spectrum is accounted for.

Then, there are the spirits. In Seiran, they are called djinns, while neighboring countries call them orishas or daimons. Not much is know about them to the humans, sometimes they’re depicted as gods, sometimes they appear as demons, other times they are just really powerful mages. Most legends agree that they can control three of the four arch elements, namely fire, wind and water, although some people whisper about the existence of an earth djinn with power equal to a god in some secret location. Other than that, it’s all guessing with these guys. However, since our WIP is mainly told through the eyes of Zaira, one of these djinns, you’ll learn a bit more about them real fast. For culture nerds:

As a finish note, let’s talk religion. The people of Seiran aren’t as devoted in their faith as their southern neighbors, but most still believe in the existence of the Great Divine, ruler and creator of everything (except for humanity) and his children, Sheezan and Shardeen. Since the Great Divine is unknowable and even nameless, religious seirs pray to his son Sheezan, the hero god of mankind and according to some its first ruler. In the legends, Sheezan used a magical saber to severe a hundred and twelve souls from his father’s spirit, thus creating the first humans. His twin sister and wife (you know, deities) Shardeen is revered as the spirit of luck, power, charm and magic, so many adventurous and ambitious people seek her favor.

Then there are six lesser deities identified with freshwater, fire, mountains, the wind, and the two moons circling the night sky. I won’t bore you with names right now, but each of them has an alternate meaning and certain professions require a belief in one or the other. Soldiers for example receive the blessing of Idar, god of stones and mountains, but also bravery, morality and strength. Three out of the six even have priestly orders devoted to following their teachings and helping the seir populace find the way back into the gods' favor to regain their lost riches.

Since this is a religion, there's no proof that either of these gods exist. Unlike some other fantasy stories like Lord of the Rings, we left them as simply beliefs rather than cannon entities. Other countries have entirely different religions, which sometimes overlap, sometimes couldn't be further apart. Having said that, there might be some truth in every myth if you search hard enough... That’s it for today, I hope it was interesting. If you have questions or would like to know more about a certain topic, I’d be happy to follow up! So don’t be shy and take care, travelers!

Cheers, Dar