#like a ghoonghat

[teaah-art]

Desi LGBT Fest 2023 (hosted by @desi-lgbt-fest)

Day 2 : Legacy

Ghoonghat : A Portrait of The South Asian Third Gender

CW : Colonialism, Transphobia, Homophobia, Casteism

TW : Transphobia, Homophobia, Slur usage

South Asian history has ALWAYS been queer. We have ALWAYS had gender nonconformity as an integral part of our society. Yet, the modern Indian "conservative" view somehow points fingers to alleged western influence or modernization when it comes to queer visibility, fabricating a fundamental disconnect between South Asian culture and queer identities that was never supposed to be there. Why? What may have caused this mental divide? The answer might lie in systemic barriers built during the British Raj and the lasting consequences of that.

Third Gender identities such as the Kothi, Hijra, Khwaja Sira, Aravanis, and more are queer identities native to South Asia. No existing lgbtq label in usage in the Anglosphere describes them accurately and while 'Transgender' does serve as a viable umbrella term, it doesn't quite catch all the nuances. The term 'Third Gender' as a phrase does come close to distinguishing the identity as its own unique label, despite the term 'Third Gender' once again, being a western terminology tracing back to the 1860s which was once again proposed in a non-South Asian context and would still only serve as a broad umbrella term. Having said that, I will still continue to use 'Third Gender' to refer to these communities here because most of the names have been and do get frequently used as a slur. While much gets discussed in the anglosphere about slur reclamation in lgbtq+ spaces, South Asian queer dialogues aren't that well organized and not being a Third Gender person myself, I am hesitant and unsure of the appropriate use for community specific terms, which again vary from region to region.

History of South Asian Third Gender communities traces back to AT LEAST medieval era, if not farther back. While roots are hard to trace back and South Asian queer history may not be as linear and resolved as one may want to think, stigmatization of Third Gender communities along with other queer labels can certainly be traced back to colonial times. Section 377 of the British Colonial Penal Code, enforced in 1862 criminalized any sexual acts that were deemed 'against the order of nature' and was meant to systemically target homosexuality, sodomy, and any sexual nonconformity in the British colonies of the time. The Criminal Tribes Act of 19th and 20th century British regime in South Asia, that set out to profile hundreds of castes, tribes, and communities as 'hereditary criminals' (237 communities as of 1931), also included Third Gender communities and likely reinforced the queerphobia in society that Section 377 may have already established.

At the time of independence, when the Criminal Tribes Act was scrapped from the Indian constitution, but Section 377 remained. This means, as of 1950, you could legally present as a Third Gender individual, you could be in Third Gender communes in public and would no longer be arrested for it! But if you came out of the closet for say, being gay, or bi, you could still end up in jail. Not to mention that about 200 years of queerphobia, systemic queerphobia, does not change in a day despite legal reforms. So in 1950, when we were in a position where being gnc had legal immunity but being non-heteronormative didn't, Third Gender folks were put in a unique position where they could push for change. And push, they certainly did! I should note here that my discussion here of any legal reforms past 1950 would be limited to India since I am an Indian citizen and know Indian systems the best.

In 1994, India recognized Third Gender communities as a legal sex separate from the gender binary. This came with voting rights, right to contest in elections as a Third Gender person, right to legally LIVE as a third gender person, and more. On the state level, Third Gender activism ensured affirmative action for trans people not only for government jobs but also corporate jobs. Pension plans, welfare coverage, medical insurance, and even systemic changes towards establishing legal measures against gender discrimination. Despite the social stigma, despite their community names being used as literal slurs, Third Gender people have been at the forefront of every single South Asian queer activism and they have been WINNING!

I wish they got the recognition they rightfully deserve outside of South Asia as well. Current global queer activism is at a crossroads where trans exclusion has taken roots even in parts of the community. A lot of the exclusionary activism stems from the regimes and mentality that have a history in South Asia of erasing and colonising queer history. Is it so surprising then, that these regimes elevated bigots to power who further the same narrative they've been peddling since as far back as the 19th century? Shouldn't, then, Third Gender voices and activism inspire persevering and continuing to persevere against those very same barriers?

Third Gender erasure, reclamation, and activism is South Asian legacy, a story of resisting colonial structures, status quo, and systemic oppression. It is high time it gained visibility in international queer spaces.

Some articles to read under the cut (likely far more credible than my rant). Heavy TW for Transphobia and Homophobia for nearly all of the articles.

Shabnam Mausi - India's first trans Member of the Legislative Assembly (MLA)

The whole debacle with the 2019 Trans Rights Bill

The Hijra community and their plight during the pandemic

A Tamil Third Gender perspective on community labels

The Khwaja Siras of Pakistan and their legislative battles

A Bangladeshi ally's conundrum on what term to use for Third Gender communities

[om-is-ok]

My thoughts on that moongfali anon kand

I found out everything about @mainapnifavouritehoon bad experience with that behenchod through my gc mates last night when everything was over. I feel little bad but not much of regret because "mahila mandali" you all girls slayed. Even if I was here at that time when everything was ongoing I wouldn't have participated and would have watched everything through sidelines while hyping you up because it was moment of female fam, it was to show that moongfali what does "wo stree hai kuch bhi kar sakti hai" means. In the end he never showed himself like a "namard." Also never came to any man's ask box and kept hiding in anons of girl's.

Bkl namard hai anon ban ke soft hearted girls ko target karta aur chutiye jaise anon ke ghoonghat me rha end tak. Lodu meri girlfriend ko hath lagana to dur ki baat tu use dekhega bhi to zinda gaad dunga tujhe lawde.

@alhad-si-simran I'm proud of you *forehead kiss* I love you so much Jaanudi 🫂❤️ (Plus thank you everyone who sent so many supporting asks and love in my babe's ask box. I saw everyone's support and I don't have words. I'm grateful for all of you.)

@mainapnifavouritehoon more power to you and don't let it bother you and next time someone like that comes up take a screenshot aur jitni bhi galiya aati hai sab de dena taki aainda se koi himmat na kare aur report + report kar dena. 🫶🏼

@ekcupchaide well done *head pat* thank you behna for protecting and supporting my girl when I wasn't around. (meko bohot bura lag rha hai bc me nhi tha tabhi tum dono ne lafde le liye at least jab ho rha tha ek text kar dete na abe Simmu ne bola to nhi batayegi kya kesi behen hai tu I feel betrayed. mkc sale ki teen bar😑)

@vellibandi thank you for hyping all girls who were targeted by that madarchod. (And no you can't have my girlfriend cause she's only mine and my queen alone. You can worship her from afar as she rules my heart.)

@chanda-chamke-cham-cham your murder was the best and I love it. little sister here flowers for your bravery 🌹🌹🌹🌹.

@moons-scar your end wala reply, I agree with that and you were amazing yesterday thanks for replying to that fucker's anon on Simmu ki posts. 🫂❤️

And I'm sorry if I forgot anyone to mention but I salute you for your fighting spirits. 🫶🏼

[frelsy]

Failed and out of Love

Update on the love story: We did it again. I had a very impromptu party at my place recently. And the following day, we hooked up. It was slow, sensual, steamy, everything I wanted and liked about him. It was perfect. And I couldn’t stop the emotions from coming. I tried to convince him to keep doing this, I tried to convince him to make it more than an occasional thing, I tried everything, but I couldn’t get him to say yes. The following day, I met my friend and in due course of conversation, I realized that you always regret the shots you don’t fire, so I will regret it. I called up the common friend who knew about us and told him everything. I told him how I have been miserable for the last 5 months and how I do not understand why this guy simply won’t be with me, in the hopes that he will talk some sense into him. He promised to, but I didn’t have a lot of hope in his powers after the conversation. The following day, Adam and I had a long conversation about this. It was more of a crying session for me, but I tried everything in my power to convince him. I didn’t leave any stones unturned. But the answer was a no. It really pushed me to a very sad pit. I cried for the rest of the day.

Then… I got my period. I knew I was due soon, in fact I was a little late and I somewhere knew that this was the surge of hormones before periods speaking, but today, on the second day, I really feel the difference. I am rational now, and my head is not cloudy at all. Today I met with him again and we had a long conversation (5 hours), by the end of which I could see so much clearly. Life with this guy would have been so miserable, I would be forced to crave things out of my marriage very soon. For starters, he wants a submissive girl for a wife. (By the way, he is a little weird so maybe try not to don’t judge his choices too much for your own sanity). The reason for that is he has seen his mother be submissive to his dad, and when his ex would snap at her, he would wish his girl to be meeker. I had heard this before from him but this time, when I realized this was being applied to me, I grew very uncomfortable. Bro, until yesterday I was ready to give up on so many things for you, but you cannot ask me to be more submissive. I cannot be one of those wives who have no voice in the house. He went on listing more things and then things came to my head also. The major one that came to my head was his command over English. It is a little eh, and I really find good communication skills and good English very attractive in a man. Other reasons from his side were, his wife should be religious, should have the manners to put ghoonghat on her head when relatives visit, should be adjustable to life in his village. These things made me realize how asking me to do these things will be such a torture for me. His father would not approve of a wife who drinks alcohol, in fact, he would judge her too much. And here, in my family, I sit and drink along with my sister’s father-in-law. I realized if I were to become his wife, I would be expected to be a certain way that I am not. I would probably not be able to eat pork and beef ever, because I would not have my husband to share a plate with. I would not be able to just be me in front of my in-laws. So, all in all, I would be more miserable throughout the marriage. And I am happy I can finally clearly see and realize how privileged I am in comparison to the rest of the Indian society, and how if I don’t have an equally forward-looking husband, I would suffer a lot inside.

[more-savi]

Anupama Weekly Written Update 05 June to 10 June 2023

Anupama Weekly Written Update 05 June to 10 June 2023

Anupama Written Update 5th June 2023 Anuj and Anupama have a heart to heart conversation when they come to their house. Anuj assures her that the house will always be hers and encourages her to come. When Anupama walks over to the flowers, she is reminded of her first time at the Kapadia house. Dolly and Leela discuss the extravagant decorations, and Leela is surprised at the cost of the flowers. Dolly sees someone hiding behind the curtain, but Leela doesn't see him. Anupama fixes the flowers and lights the lamp in the house's temple. Anuj empowers her to fix her broken house and promises to remind her that the house belongs to her. Maya interrupts their conversation and sends Anuj away. She comes to her own house and talks to Anupama about her feelings. Anupama says that she does not mind the circumstances now and believes that destiny will make everything right at the right time. Leela, known for her sarcastic remarks, criticizes Dimpy's wedding expenses. While controlling family expenses, Leela directs her remarks towards Anuj and Dolly, highlighting their lavish lifestyle at home. This leads to a heated argument, and Leela with a veil over her face witnesses some strangers suspecting them of being thieves. The strangers run away, and Leela explains the situation to Barkha. Anuj welcomes Vanraj and Kavya during the wedding ceremony and invites them to attend the garland exchange ritual. Anupama also requests Kavya to join Vanraj, indicating to unite as a family. There is a garland exchange ceremony, and each couple's age had its own separate garland exchange ceremony. Anupama Written Update 6th June 2023 Kinjal compliments Dimpy as a bride and wishes for a traditional wedding instead of her sister. Dimpy recalls Barkha's advice to assert herself and not be a helpless daughter-in-law like Anupama, Kavya and Kinjal. Leela keeps Meenu and Bhairavi away from household chores, but Kanta questions her partiality. Intervening, Anupama defends Bhairavi and says that she is his daughter and should be treated equal. Leela and Kanta argue, Kanta says that strangers are better than Leela and her son for the pain she has caused Anupama. Anupama tries to control the situation, but Leela continues to express her dislike for Dimpy and her displeasure over her going to the US. Leela meets two masked strangers and accuses them of being thieves. However, to everyone's surprise, Dimpy recognizes her as her mother. Dimpy's mother attends the wedding, and there are emotional moments when they apologize to each other and make up. Dimpy's mother calls him as her son-in-law and fixes her ghoonghat and bangles. Anupama and others apologize for misunderstanding Dimpy's mother. Dimpy's mother shames her decision not to support her daughter when she needs it. Leela questions his actions, but Dimpy's mother defends herself and apologizes for not treating Dimpy well. Dimpy's mother believes Anupama to be Dimpy's real mother when Hasmukh asks Samar and Dimpy to go to the wedding hall. Anupama Written Update 7th June 2023 Dimpy's mother expresses her gratitude to Anupama for supporting and fighting for her, accepting Dimpy as her daughter and now as her daughter-in-law without any dowry expectation. Vanraj and Anuj also understand the importance of daughter's marriage. Leela makes sarcastic remarks during the conversation, but Dimpy's mother advises her to treat her in-laws well and consider them as her family. The wedding rituals of Samar and Dimpy begin, in which many different rituals are performed. Anupama thinks about her marriage. Now that the wedding rituals are over, everyone is praising the couple. Anupama advises them to seek the blessings of elders and strengthen their relationship. Hasmukh, Leela, Bhavesh, Kanta, Vanraj, Kinjal, Toshu, Ankush and Barkha bless the couple with their knowledge. Anuj recites a poem that emphasizes the importance of sharing feelings in a relationship. Anupama hugs the newlyweds, which signifies their marriage. Dimpy's mother decides to leave when Toshu says it is time to celebrate. Vanraj, however, insists that this did not stop him from enjoying the wedding feast. Dimpy's mother eventually leaves, and tearfully bids her goodbye. Anupama impatiently waits for someone at the door, and happily sees Malati Devi, a famous classical dancer, arrive with Nakul. Anuj welcomes her and Guruma protects her feet while walking on the nail. Anuj and Guruma feel a spiritual connection. Anupama Written Update 8th June 2023 Anuj does not allow Malti Devi to step on the nail while thanking Anupama. Guruma blesses Anuj, and Anupama enthusiastically introduces Guruma and Nakul to everyone. Hasmukh respects Guruma's presence and thanks her for her blessings for Samar and Dimpy. Anuj slips, but insists that he is fine and tells Anupama to go to Gurumaa. Anupama asks Samar and Dimpy to seek Guruma's blessings, and they receive a hand-embroidered cloth as a gift. Kinjal says that Guruma herself made it. Guruma stresses the importance of timing and the value of timely gifts. Anupama introduces everyone in the family to Gurumaa, and Vanraj thanks Anupama for giving him the opportunity to fulfill his dream. Guruma forgives Vanraj, but time cannot be undone. Anupama tells the rest of the family, and Maya praises Gurumaa as a dancer. Leela tries to provoke Guruma with nonsense, but Guruma handles it calmly and praises Anupama. Guruma admires Anupama's passion for dance, her selflessness and caring nature towards her mother and fellow students. To everyone's surprise, he declared Anupama as the successor of the American Gurukul. Guruma continuously performs aarti to Anupama and praises her. She apologizes for the timing of the announcement, saying that she considered Anupama's son's marriage a perfect opportunity. Nakul gets angry with Anupama and thinks that he deserves this position after serving Guruma since childhood. Vanraj sees Nakul's anger and thinks why is the dancer so upset. Guruma is overjoyed with the gifted badge and Anupama's words of appreciation. When the badge falls, Anuj catches it and tells Anupama that she deserves respect, insisting that Gurumaa's decision was a recognition of her worthy qualities, not a favor. Anuj said that Anupama will fulfill her responsibility completely. Anupama Written Update 9th June 2023 Anuj tells Anupama why Gurumaa and Malti Devi recognized him as Anuj in the first place. Anupama says it could be from their relationship or their past media coverage. Anuj compliments Anupama on how beautiful she looks with the rose and expresses his wish for her to grow up believing that she will miss him. It's time to surprise everyone, as Anupama leaves and Ankush goes to Anuj. Meanwhile, Hasmukh leaves with his friends, and Leela gets upset with Anupama's conversation with Guruma, saying that Guruma behaves like a queen while Anupama is her maidservant. Defending Anupama, Dolly says that no one does this to their boss. Leela also praises Vanraj for taking care of Kavya, who says that he was after Anupama earlier but is now with Kavya. Dolly said that Leela should see Vanraj, Kavya, Toshu and Kinjal, Samar and Dimpy, Anuj and Anupama happy. Nakul asks Guruma why she chose Anupama as his successor despite knowing him only a month ago, when he has been with her since childhood. Guruma says that a successor needs to have the qualities of handling difficult situations calmly and keeping everyone together, which Anupama has. To fuel Nakul's jealousy, Anupama offers to get Guruma's juice for him. Anuj announces the arrival of Kumar Sanu on the stage, who is loved by all generations and impresses even the romantic ones. Anupama Kumar knows the true meaning of Sanu's name, and she is too emotional to believe that a song is close to her heart. Everyone likes the performance, and Anupama expresses her gratitude. Anuj tells that he attended Sanu's concert during the difficult times in Mumbai, he found peace, so he invited Sanu to Samar and Dimple's wedding. The crowd applauds Sanu's performance, and Anupama recalls her romantic moments with Anuj. Then Shanu sings Tere Ishq Mein Naachenge, and the couple along with Anuj and Anupama dance around him. Maya goes to Anuj out of jealousy, due to which Anupama backs away. Seeing this, Guruma tells Anupama that their growing friendship should not become a hindrance in her own path. Anupama 3rd June 2023 Written Update Anupama Written Update 10th June 2023 Guruma and Malti Devi are worried about Anupama's friendship with Guruma Anuj as they think it might hinder Anupama's progress. Anupama defends Anuj, citing her support for his dreams, gifts and inspiration. Guruma says that Anupama cannot be completely wrong, but the post-marriage program and Gurukul should be taken care of. Anuj keeps listening to their conversation from a distance. Everyone appreciates Kumar Sanu when he is present at the function. Curb gives her a garland of flowers. Titli then meets Anuj and tells that she had decorated the flowers. Anupama praises her work and Titli says that the decoration should be like the decoration of the house. She is planning to take the payment from Anuj later due to her busy schedule. Titali told that "Dheere Dheere Meri Zindagi Mein Aana" is Sanu Da's favorite song, which Anupama also likes. They inform Titli before leaving and give her a garland of flowers for her son's wedding.Dolly notes the absence of Leela's taunts, while Dimple comments on Kumar Sanu's effect on the atmosphere. Dimple suggested continuing the dance, but Dolly felt it was time to say goodbye. Anupama says that the bride should be happy to settle in her new home, and asks Dolly to serve food to Samar and Dimple. Then Anupama goes to the kitchen to get married. Anuj asks about Guruma's conversation. Anupama, remembering Gurumaa's warning, shows it as a Gurukul discussion. Anuj asks if there is more to it, Anupama assumes it and asks if she is happy with her decision to go to America. Anuj supports her dreams, even if it means giving up on him, and appreciates her accepting them. They both understand the importance of fulfilling each other's aspirations. Dimple begins the farewell ceremony and bids an emotional farewell to the Kapadia family. Barkha reminds her of her advice. Anuj praises Samar while Leela asks if everyone else is bad except him. Anuj ends the conversation by telling Dimple that her in-laws will love and adore her. He suggests Dimple to learn from Anupama and calls her the best mother-in-law. Leela praises Anupama for bringing Dimple into the house, but Anupama asks her to stay. Leela vows to teach Dimple a lesson as soon as she comes into the Shah family, while Dimple vows to teach everyone a lesson. Anuj apologizes for Dimple's mistakes and tells Toshu more that she should behave like a sister. He requests Anupama to take care of Dimple like his own daughter. Guruma reminds everyone that Anupama will be leaving for America soon, forcing Ankush to focus on the present farewell. Guruma takes Nakul and says goodbye to the Kapadia family to Dimple. When Anupama sees Dimple getting into the car, she shares a glance with Anuj and a connection is revealed between them. Read the full article

[herawell]

punarmilan (reunion)

This fic was inspired by the ending scene of the serial Ramayana: Sabke Jeevan Ki Aadhar, broadcast on Zee TV in 2012 and available on Netflix until a couple of years ago.

~

Dusk on Lanka’s shores is a dusty, burnt-brown affair, tawdry in comparison to evenfall on Kosala’s balconies or glorious firefly-strewn sunsets in the Dandaka forest, but after a year of frantic searching and furious war, Rama has little use for contrasts. All he knows is bone-deep weariness and relief, the grittiness of sand between his toes and the roaring of waves in his ears unpunctuated by metallic clangs and war screams.

He stands alone. Even the headiness of victory has not made him forget his vow to stay out of any city. In his stead, Lakshmana, Hanuman, Vibhishana, and his other fire-forged friends have gone to retrieve his wife from her post in the ashok vatika.

His father’s oath is not the only reason he waits here alone. He has not seen Sita in nearly a twelvemonth, an expanse of time that was hellish for him and must have been even more so for her, and when he lays eyes on her again, he knows his tenuous grip on his composure will crumble away. Their meeting cannot be public. He cannot sacrifice his dignity in the eyes of his comrades like that, no matter that some sentimental souls might have liked to witness their king reunite with the queen for whom they fought a war. Before Sita alone he would willingly debase himself like that; for few others would he do so.

Sita pads along the beach, feeling the rough softness of the sand between her toes with each step. Freedom agrees with her. Salty wind brushes tendrils of hair away from her face, and her ghoonghat ripples like a banner. The sun is beginning its descent into the west, and – her heart sings – she can pick out a beloved figure, silhouetted against a horizon burning dull orange.

He stands with his back to her, facing the sea. Her husband carries the same noble bearing she recalls, but his shoulders bow slightly with a weight that was not there before, and new battle scars adorn his body. He gives no indication he senses her. But she knows his martial instincts, and knows that the recent war must have honed them. Of course he must hear the gentle crunch of sand beneath her feet, the rustling of the folds of her deerskin sari.

She draws closer, circling around him. He does not glance at her, and for one ugly moment, she thinks of what is said of women who are carried off by other men. But then he turns so that he faces her fully and meets her eyes, and oh, Sita knows all her fears to be unworthy of her husband.

He stares at her as though he cannot comprehend she is real, as though she might vanish before him. She knows Indrajit used sorcery and illusions to his cruel advantage in the war, and she does not press her husband, allowing him to simply gaze upon her as he reassures himself that she is real. It grants Sita the chance to look at her husband from the front. That weight she glimpsed in his shoulders is also in his eyes, set in a face gaunter than she remembers. But necklaces and bracelets of wanderer’s beads she crafted with her own hands still adorn his neck and arms (for the first time in their marriage, he wears more jewelry than she does, her own long flung from the pushpak vatika), and he holds his chin high. The tears she’d barely been holding back finally trail down her cheeks.

Overwhelmed suddenly by gratitude, she sinks to her knees. She touches his feet – feet she feared she would never get to touch again. Her husband had felled the most reviled king in all the three worlds to save her, and what else can she do but fall at his feet?

The brush of her shaking fingers against his feet brings Rama back to himself, and gently, he grasps Sita by the shoulders to raise her out of her prostration. She almost does not want to rise, but he tugs her up – gods above, she is so solid and warm beneath his hands – and she stands once more, and clasps her hands together in reverence.

He takes her hands in his own, stroking her pinkies with his thumbs. He knows what she is thinking, her gratitude and reverence splashed across her face like a canvas. He thinks nothing of it – how could he have done anything less than what he did, knowing what she had done for him? She gave up fourteen years of her life and crossed the length and breadth of the Dandaka forest on foot for his sake, when no vow or oath save that of her heart had compelled her. Raising an army out of nothing and crossing the sea was his bounden duty.

He holds her gaze for a long moment. A faint pallor mars Sita’s face, but she is almost as he remembers her last. Two tears track down her face, and a tremulous smile graces her lips. Her luminous eyes are so wide that he can almost see his reflection in them, and fancifully he thinks she might be able to see her reflection in his own.

At last she closes her eyes and dips her chin, burrowing herself into his chest. He presses one hand against her shoulder blades, holding him to her, the other hand clasping her palm against his chest. His heartbeat thuds against their interlocked fingers, and he rests his chin on her brow in an old gesture learned anew. The tears he’d been holding back finally streak down his cheeks in earnest. The last of the battle tension leaves his body. Sita has returned to her Rama, twilight breeze billows their robes about them, moontide laps at their feet, and nothing will separate them now.

[ginazmemeoir]

purdah in hinduism. thoughts?

religiously non existent. purdah is the practice of women's seclusion from direct contact with society, through veils or separate quarters or sequestered spaces and such.

it was brought in india through the rajputs and the delhi sultanate, both of whom are central asian (yes. shocker. rajputs are originally central asian.) historians claim that it was originally a cover used by women to protect themselves from the harsh climatic conditions, in addition to the various styles in islam (burkah, nikab, hijab, chadar etc.) and was later swiftly enforced by firstly, the rajputs, in a rising movement of patriarchy globally. the practice of purdah was strongly practiced then, and further strengthened on the arrival of the Delhi Sultanate, which brought the practice with them to most of north india. increasingly, the family's honour and reputation became increasingly linked to the woman's social interactions, and so women became more and more sequestered. ideals like the zenana or janani deohri in the rajputs became deeply entrenched in north india (yes, purdah has zero history in south india). this practice relaxed in the rajputs on the arrival of the mughals, who themselves co opted many of these, including the towering zenana walls, changing the bride's name upon marriage, and veiling them. most of these practices though were only applied on wives.

however, even then, it wasn't as rigid. miniature paintings are a clear indication. the practice became gradually rigid over time, especially under colonial rule. it can even be seen today, with women in north india covering their head with the pallu or ghoonghat in front of in laws and husbands, because of "ghar ki laaj". in rajasthan, the more oppresive ghunghat is followed, where the entire face is covered with a cloth.

hinduism nowhere states the purdah or veil. like at all. so no anon. purdah is not followed in hinduism. it is only followed by patriarchal fucks.

[maskandunveil]

Jhankaar-झंकार

She rises and drapes herself in her green silk saree,

Bangles adorn her hand, mehndi carved on her like an ancient rune,

Her eyes bright like moon in darkness of the night, decorated with kajal,

Bindi rests proudly between her brows, chest puffed out, enjoying the highest place on her,

I, however, cling desperately to her ankle,

My jhankaar, a trumpet announcing her arrival,

Bringing attention to her feet;

Chham... Chham... Chham...

I am her protest, her riot,

Her desire to be free,

When her lover enters her, I am her pleasure, When he takes her without her consent,

When unwanted hands pry her body, her disguised wounds, I am her muffled screams,

When the ache in her heart, body, soul is repressed,

I clink in unison with her bangles, Jhumkas,

Fighting against injustice;

I am her grief, when her newborn daughter is snatched from her hands,

Her son taught their oppressive ways,

When she cries for the man who never loved her,

I am her blood, when she bleeds each month,

I am her laughter when she hides her pain behind her ghoonghat,

I am her voice,

Not just a ghunghroo, panjeb, payal,

Chham...Chham... Chham...Jhankaar...

-©Pratibha Badgal AA

[happilyaloof]

Our scriptures are our only History

06/09/20

While reading Srimad Bhagavad Puran today, it again reminded me of how advanced we were. And it really is disappointing how we let the cultures of others (Mughals and Britishers) change us into this backward country/community and not only this, they embedded it in us that we always were this backward too, erasing even the will to go back and check with our history whether what they're accusing us of is true or not.

1) Everyone keeps calling us racists. And it's true. We do give more importance to fair complexion. But noone, NOONE wants to know how we have come to be called that. And till the time we won't get this accusation off us, we won't be able to go past being racists too. Because it has become our identity now even when it's not. It never was. For instance, in the Bhagwatam, the description of any individual includes the complexion just like any other detail like clothes or hair length or height etc. Never ever have they even mentioned the color as a drawback of the personality. It's just a detail to draw a picture of the person they're referring to.

It's only after the Britishers overpowered us that to boost their egos, they made us differentiate between them the 'oppressors' and us the 'oppressees' on the basis of the color. And just like that we never 'freed' ourselves from their rule even after they're gone.

2) Another accusation that came to my mind (out of many) is that we are backward when it comes to clothing our women. The infamous ghoonghat! Which again noone wanted to cross check with our history. We accepted whatever was spoon fed to us, by the invaders of not just our land but also our mind. And it has brought us here today that there is a rape news every now and then. Because Mughals didn't have the eye to look at women as anything more than a sex object, they had to cover theirs because otherwise they'd be distracted all the time. And since they were ruling, they made us cover ours too. But if, only if we could have not mugged up their poisons and checked from our glorious history that they have pure descriptions of whichever princess, queen, Goddess, any female individual talked about in the texts of those times. They have included even their breasts as a mere detail again like any other general body part such as shoulders, hair, eyes etc. And there have been saints born after reading the same texts, so isn't it clear that the lens with which we viewed our women never required us to see them in long ghoonghats!

A page from my journal

Ashhvairya

[sokkas-first-fangirl]

How do Omega veils work? Are they just a sheer cloth draped over the head like a ghoonghat or more like a wrap like dupatta?

For the most part, I see them being a sheer cloth draped over the head 😊 Like these!

[kikifika]

To start with, it’s not a GYAAN and I’m not debating. But here’s something I’d just like to share.

We are here in 2020, witnessing viruses, asteroids, aliens, earthquakes, wildfires, volcanoes, crazy floods, cyclones, snow getting green, and unfortunately PEOPLE: who are still forcing LADY OF THE HOUSE to put on her GHOONGHAT.

YES in ancient days, women used to cover their heads and faces, yes women of all classes, yeah of majority of religions. Well, here’s a fun fact: THEY DID IT BY THEIR OWN FREE WILL

They did it just to keep their hair from being ruffled by breeze, on special occasions like marriage (even men wore turbans – so it’s nothing about gender here). For adornment of their hair. It has been a sign of respect for the elders, like we do in Mandirs, and Gurudwaras, and Masjids. It has been a sign for showing don’t hit up on me; I AM ALREADY TAKEN – we have couples getting names of their beloved.

There are ladies out there who don’t want to put a veil on while they’re cooking at approximately 44 degrees Celsius. Or later, when they’d want a cool breeze to dry that sweat. 


They say it is to maintain your virtue, all those morals, to keep you away from buri nazar (of men who don’t have their minds under control). Guess what, maybe you need a GHOONGHAT  because those whose thoughts have no cover, no shame or decorum or any virtue, those who can’t think to understand others, who think someone’s lower than them for being of a different gender, may cover themselves with a thousand garments, yet they walk the earth naked. Women of good character, good thinking are guarded only by their own virtue and nothing else.

Follow the tradition but don’t try to make a person faceless, identity-less and voice-less. Don’t try to put all those feelings and emotions behind the veil. Everybody has rights, RIGHTS ON THEIR OWN LIFE.

[meethb]

Portrait Image 1/3 - This image was taken as a part of my sister’s “Ghoonghat series” project which translates to a head covering or headscarf worn in the Indian subcontinent by women to cover their heads and often their faces. She got inspiration from an Instagram page and wanted me to try capture a similar style. I chose this image and the following images as these are probably the best portraits I’ve taken considering portraiture and guiding a model aren’t my strong points. The sunlight definitely helped when this photo and the following photos were shot as it meant I could use a faster shutter speed. I like how the headscarf made a curved shape along her face and the fact that half her face is covered made it look like an interesting composition.

[maheshporwal-blog1]

Sanatan Dharma's relevance

Hinduism(Sanatan Dharma) is the way of living,the only religion which neither bound it's follower to worship nor warn against not being a believer in God, it's main focus is "karma", which decides heaven or hell for all creatures.a) is the way of living,the only religion which neither bound it's follower to worship nor warn against not being a believer in God, it's main focus is "karma", which decides heaven or hell for all creatures.

Hinduism doesn't spread hatred, it never propose or promote any action against non believers, instead it respect and favor new thoughts, as we believe in learnings from "Vedas and Shrimadbhagwat Geeta" Which convey "Change is inevitable" Which means "change is only the permanent thing in the universe", hence we respect thoughts from other religions and we assimilate, absorb and sometimes adopt new ways of living, if it's practical and not against nature's law like in medieval period we adopted "ghoonghat" to prevent our ladies from invaders.

Sanatan dharma is most peaceful religion( I still consider, it as way of living life and dharma for me is the way, we need to present ourselves or behave in a certain way in society, will be explaining same in different article).

For me every person who believes in " Karma theory" is partially practicing "Sanatan Dharma" and if the same person become courageous enough to admit, that even God has "no right to punish anyone, if one lived a life helping others and not harmed anyone, no matters "he worshipped or not worshipped" He will be entitled for Heaven, God's only objective should be promoting "peace and harmony" and not to punish it's own creation for forgetting him or not worshipping him in certain way or by following rituals.

To be continued.....!!!

[bhumikasingh]

My grandmother has this way of making people cry

as if all the dams separating the four chambers of the heart are broken at once,

when she caresses the forehead.

As if the eye lids get so heavy in that moment,

they snap like the taut string

which has been burdened

beyond its capacity.

.

My mother told me once that

when she used to cook,

grandfather used to ask her

what was for dinner,

and she used to serve a soft pat on his back

—a delicacy for making through the day,

even though she was never a part of it.

.

My family has been a book written by an author

who misunderstood the meanings

of feminism and feminity,

of misogyny and masculinity.

.

The males let the females go out of the house

after 8 pm with a list of commandments

which would make Moses flinch,

and call it feminism.

.

The females try to drag around their dreams

wrapped in nine yards of feminity,

but it falls short.

They try to hold the pieces of their failed feminism

inside the cave of their ghoonghat,

but it is too dark in there.

.

So when I come back home at 9 o’clock

on a saturday night,

reeking of disappointment,

and having lost the list of commandments

while trying to walk faster than I can

[because running is too dangerous here],

my grandmother reminds me how forgetting anything

is fatal to the human mind

because it tries to remember the most

what has been perfectly lost.

.

I try to remind her

how she has forgotten

what she wanted to be at the age of thirty,

but of course she doesn’t remember anything

—her mind doesn’t try anymore.

I call her an anomaly to her own discovery,

she says it’s the law.

I whisper into the floor,

“And, I’m the sedition.”

.

My grandmother has this way of making people cry,

she whispers into their ear,

“Everything gets better one day.”

And the people wonder

whether she knows the difference

between today and the day that,

she is certain,

would find its way to her doorstep.

//we don’t open doors to strangers after 7(0)//

[pairedaeza]

कभी कभी शाम ऐसे ढलती है के जैसे घूँघट उतर रहा है kabhi kabhi shaam aise dhalti hai ke jaise ghoonghat utar raha hai sometimes the evening shivers into the night like the slow flutter of a veil

Gulzar, from ‘Zeehal-E-Muskin’. Translation mine.

[romans-art]

@ y'all who think I don't know Yellow Diamond's hair isn't actually a helmet -- I know. It's just a very specific highly stylised interpretation for a historically inspired outfit AU that I've been drawing since forever.

I like Yellow's helmet and White's crown and Blue's ghoonghat and Pink's silly tudor bonnet. I know they're not canon. I just like them.

[trans-pagans]

Stupid question but what is veiling

Not stupid at all! 

veiling is when you wear a veil as a religious practice. Most religions participate in some form of veiling. For instance, Muslims have hijabs, Jewish folks have tichels and Many Hindu, Jane, and Sikh people wear ghoonghats. 

Just like these other religious traditions many Pagan’s veil too. Pagan veiling is most common in Hellenic traditions but can be done as a sign of devotion in other pagan traditions as well, and can involve wearing anything from a full body length veil to just a small headscarf.

Hope that answers your question!