#like catch a hint man if u know i dont fuck with u why are u whining about me not wanting to talk ESP when im in the middle of something

[ragingbullmode]

the white bitch at work i cant stand is telling everyone im the rudest person in the store when in reality while i hauled hundreds of lbs of shipment into the store to & fro for an hour she kept trying to press me for my astrological signs while following me & doing jack shit & all i said was “i dont know” to get her to shut up like

[smoochkooks]

okay lemme take a deep breath and then scream about newest @personasintro 's mutual help update

[childish-ish]

Yoo! *hands you subway sandwich* I absolutely loved the soulmate AU with Micheal making choices for each other. And I was wondering (if you can/want) what would it be like for Billy Lenz.

hii *fucking devours subway sandwich* thank u so much i love u <3 i would love to write for him! sorry if hes ooc :<

sorry it took so long too, i thought it said lOOMIS AND I LOOK BACK AND IT SAYS LENZ LMFAAAOOOOOOOO then i procrastinated xd its super awkward and weird, im sorry!! i tried- i was on major fucking writers block!!

bro u made me eat a bug dont talk to me

soulmate au.. makin choices fo eachother..

billy lenz x reader

also, just imagine like. a party right before christmas and they dont call the police to help them rather do it themselves, but then 1 girl calls and they're on their way at the end.. ya dig? ALSO I KNOW ITS HIS HOME BUT I DIDNT HAVE AN IDEA SO xd

"Hello?" You answer the phone politely, looking over your notes before closing the book as you wait in silence for a reply on the other line. "Hellooo?" You drag out the 'o' in hello.

"Y/n? Hey, hows'it going. Listen i have this party goin' on and I know you don't have jack-shit to do, so, why don't you come on over?"

Barb! Ah, that bitch.. should i? You thought over the pros and cons as Barb waited impatiently on the other line.

soulmate chooses: go to party.

"Yeah, I'm coming. Streets?" You ask, opening your notebook back up, flipping to a blank page as Barb told you the address. You hang up on the girl and rip the piece of paper off, holding it between your teeth as you lift yourself from your cushioned chair, grabbing your coat that hung on the back and quickly stuffed the address in the pocket of your coat.

eat bug or do not eat bug.

You furrow your eyebrows at the choices. Before choosing 'do not eat the bug'. What the fuck?

Of course you would choose not to eat the fucking bug. You weren't a dick. But your fucking soulmate was. You were totally gonna beat their fucking ass for choosing such choices.

You sigh, grabbing your coat on the way out. Your necessities jingling in your pockets of said coat. You shove your hand in, dragging out your keys, turning around to lock your door. Sighing once more, as you enter your car and start the ignition. You pull out the address. "Can't be too hard, can it?" You mutter, finally pulling out of your driveway.

"Hello!" You wiggle your fingers as a small wave at the unrecognizable woman who opened the door. "Hello." Sge greeted back softly. "Are you a friend of Barbs'?"

"You betcha!"

"Well, I'm Jess! It's a pleasure to meet you.. come on in!" Jess opened the door wider. You see a few other girls chatting lively. A glass or a beer bottle in their hands. You follow Jess.

"Y/n! You made it! Good job." Barb greeted you, immediately handing you a beer you watched her pop open. You grab it, took a gulp, and thanked her.

You spot an ant crawling on the counter by you. Jess and Barb began to argue softly. Background noise.. You debate on whether to wipe it up and eat it. You shake your heads of the thoughts to rid of the possibility of your soulmate choosing-

eat the ant.

You growl under your breath, crushing the ant under your index finger and wiping it off on your tongue. You swallow it with your spit.

Im totally beating my soulmates fucking ass.. you thought angrily, chugging the rest of your piss-tasting beer. Chug, chug, chug! You cheer yourself on.

soulmate chooses: chug.

You chuckle before downing the rest of your cheap beer. Barb hands you another wordlessly. A smirk planted on her lips as she watches you down another.

"You should really slow down, Y/n."

"Eeh come on, Jess." Barb rolled her eyes, tossing an empty bottle into the trashcan. "Her soulmate probably made her chug." Barb defends poorly.

"I suppose.. how about you chug some water?"

"Yeah.. that'd be best. I'm already feeling a fucking buzz!" You laugh, being the lightweight you were.

Soon. You had awoke in a extremely comfortable bed with a small headache.

"It's so quiet.." You mutter to yourself. Dragging your hand over your face before quickly pulling away, realising you already had acne that was beginning to sprout. You stare at the ceiling, glancing at the window. Still night-time. You turn your head to the nightstand. The lamp was on. A small glass of water.

"Awh." You smile at the thought of one of the girls leaving a cup of water for you, quietly closing the door behind them. You immediately sit up and chug the water, tossing in the two pills that lied on a small napkin right next to it. You swallow, lathering the pills up in your spit.

You stretch your arms over your head, before falling back onto the plush mattress layered in bedding. You sigh, before finally deciding that it was time to get up and see what was going on downstairs. If you were even upstairs.. you cant tell. Maybe you were downstairs? You continued your train of thought as you closed the door behind you politely. Not bothering to take the glass with you.

You continue down the stairs, hand sliding down the railing as you slowly step down each step, before noticing the sticky, yet not sticky liquid your hand laid in. "The fuck? Strawberry syrup, L-O-L." You lift it up to your lips, licking. Clearly not thinking as the taste registered.

"Pennies. Blood? Oops." You wipe your fingers off on your shirt, quickly continuing down the stairs. "Baaarrrb?!" You call out, awkwardly. "Oh. Who's the shit-face drunk lying on the floor." You step closer towards the dining area. "Barb? You fucking drunk." You snicker.

soulmate chooses: kick her.

You do so. Not like you had any choice yourself. Kicking her lightly in the stomach, you step away. "What the fuck?!" You shriek, slapping the hand that was placed in your shoulder. You turn around to face a rugged man in a dark sweater and black pants. no shoes? Yet socks on his feet.. "Who are you?!"

The person before you didn't answer before lifting up a single hand thay held a.. glass unicorn? The tip of the horn was covered in a red substance. You could only assume strawberry syrup once more.

"Murderer!" You shriek, grabbing the lamp next to you and chucked it at the offending man who barely dodged it. He screamed back in response before lunging at you; successfully tackling you to the carpet rug.

"I can't believe you, are my soulmate.. well no, i can." You place your index finger on your chin in a thoughtful manner as you stare at the ceiling. "Are you?"

"billy made you eat an ant." he snickers horridly in your ear.

As, Billy, with the biggest cock known to man, squabbled and licked the shell of your ear, muttering about pigs and boobs and pussies, you nod to yourself.

"I can just hand you over to the police, no problem." You hug yourself. "But could I, really? My soulmate. Who has killed people.. Barb. God, you fucking cunt!" You screech, rolling away from him, just to jump back on the wide-eyed motherfucker, wrapping your hands around his neck and your cunt being right over his crotch. Haha.

He gasped for air, short, uneven nails scratch at your hands.

Tables were turned, and you were back on the floor with Billy over you, screaming out profanities.

"I'm sorry, Billy." You apologize falsely. Tears streaming down to your ears, since, you were on the floor.. gravity? "You killed my friend, man. I didn't even know her that long!"

Billy leans over and licks the tears away. You flinch away, before he pulls you into his lap awkwardly, his head dipped down into the crevice of your neck and sniffed loudly before giggling to himself.

"Billy's pretty little pig. Billy's. Pretty pig. Pretty cunt. Pretty, pretty, pretty." He mutters, an odd sense of nostalgia washed over you, catching an odd scent that activated said nostalgia.

"Move bitch. Let me get fucking comfortable." You snap, pulling out of his hold and turning your body around to face him. Crotch to crotch as you wrap your legs above his own.. does this make sense? You wrap your legs around his and he crosses his legs, wrapping his arms around you tightly as you fiddle with his hair.

"Man, you are such a fucking dick. Making me do all those fucking things while i chose nice things for you.." You lay your head on his shoulder. Very much stinky, yes.

"We should dip though. Didn't one of the girls call the police while yo' dumb-fucking-ass was suffocating one?" You pull away, getting a good look at his face.

You wouldn't say he was.. handsome.. but you certainly wouldn't say he was ugly. His skin was.. a sickly pale yellow. His.. fuckimg huge brown eyes stared at you. His cracked lips were curled into a unnerving smile.

soulmate chooses: leave.

"Yeah. Let's go." You stand, offering him a hand.

Billy's blood coated calloused hand makes contact with your own. You gag, covering your lips with your free-hand. "Fucking disgusting." You mutter in disgust, enduring it for the sake of your new partner.

You shove Billy in the back of your car, slamming the door shut and sprinting to the other side, just to slip right before you put your hand on the door.

You swing it open angrily, sitting down and starting the ignition, ignoring Billy's giggles and mutters as he peers out the window like a little kid looking at snow for the first time.

break the window or tap obnoxiously.

You roll your eyes, the hint of a smile plastered onto your lips.

tap obnoxiously.

[tastyykpop]

Hiii Congrats on reaching the milestone💕💕love your blog btw!! Could you please do a Taeyong smut where he is kinda cold to her before but confesses after he becomes very jealous??

Hii ty so much u have no clue how much this means to me🥺

ɪ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ, ɪᴅɪᴏᴛ

Pairings: tsundere!taeyong x reader

Genre: smut

Warnings: d/s themes, jealousy, possessiveness, marking, praising, a dash of spanking, fingering, hair pulling, unprotected sex

I finished this at 4am so it's not edited 💔

"Lee Taeyong!!" You chased the dark haired boy down the side walk, never turning to look back as his name was called, "Wait for me please!"

He scoffed. Luckily you couldn't hear him. "What an annoying brat." Taeyong continued on, still ignoring you and your protests of him walking away.

Running as fast as you could to catch up was easier said then done. You held boba and your food from a nearby fast food restaurant in one hand, Taeyongs in another with your purse flopping against you. You wouldn't be in this situation if Taeyong scare you into holding his food for you, threatening you with a cold stare.

Yes, you and Taeyong are friends. It's odd because of how cold and almost rude he is with you, but you're somehow friends, at least you think you are. Some people say he's got a soft spot for you but you're not too sure anymore. One day hes calling you an idiot for not taking care of yourself and the next hes rolling his eyes at you and telling you to fuck off. Coming to the conclusion that maybe he only thinks of you as a friend, you started pushing him away recently and hung out with another friend of yours. Too bad because you may have had feelings for Taeyong too. Something about him made you want to stick around even though most of the time he didn't want you around.

"Goddammit Taeyong...wait up!"

As annoying as it was to be running with food and drinks in both hands, the most annoying part had to be the purse. It was big, heavy, and swayed with every step, bumping into your left arm ever millisecond. Why couldn't you just man up to Taeyong before?

"Bastard."

"Did you say something?"

"Huh- what!? When did you-" you tilted your head upwards to meet Taeyongs arched brow and impatient face. How did you not realize you caught up?

You pushed his food and drink into his chest and grumbled, "Here." And without waiting for Taeyong, you readjusted your purse and walked to your house with expectations that he would follow.

Taeyong frowned yet tailed you like a lost puppy.. He didn't have any plans catching up to you or telling you to wait for him and just admired you from behind. He liked the way your hair bounced over your shoulders with every step, the way your hips swayed as you walked. He even liked how long the skirt made your legs look even though you were tiny compared to him. Taeyong liked you without a doubt, but he wouldnt actually tell you that.

"Are you coming?" You opened the door to your house. Taeyong didn't answer, only pushing you out of the way and beelining it to the table where he placed his food and drink. "I'll take that as a yes..." you sigh.

Placing your food gently on the table, you sat across from the male who eyed you up and down but with no expression crossing his face.

"Y/n." Taeyongs stern voice startled you as you almost choked on a boba pearl. "Whats on your neck?"

"My neck?" Softly, you touched the side of your neck before realizing what he meant. Yesterday, that friend of yours that you've started hanging out with asked you to hang out. And little did you know, hanging out didn't mean just watching movies or joking around. It soon turned to small touches, then kissing, then making out. Before you knew it, he was kissing and sucking your neck, creating the purple mark that now painted your skin. "Oh...it's nothing. Just a bruise."

"What are you stupid? Your telling me you just happened to bruise your neck? Dumbass."

"Then why did you ask if you already know?" You mumbled.

As you took the biggest bite from your burger, Taeyong had to speak up again, "I hate it."

"Its a good thing it's not on you then isn't it."

"I think you would look better covered in my marks." His voice never faltered and you were sure he was joking. Taeyongs always been straight forward with you, but this seemed like a joke, it had to be a joke. Your mind was playing tricks on you and this is what you wanted to hear. It can't be real.

"You're kidding right...?"

"Completely serious."

"So you're...jealous?"

"Stop asking so many questions." He said coldly, shutting you up quickly, but the smirk on your face still lingered.

"I just think it's funny that a small mark on my neck could make someone as cold as you are, jealous." You say, confidence flowing out of you out of nowhere and this time, Taeyong went quiet. "Its cute."

"Cute? You know what's cute is me bending you over this table and fucking the life out of you so you only remember my name and who owns that cute ass."

Heat rose to your cheeks and the tips of your ears, and maybe Taeyong could tell but youre sure your face was starting to show a hint of red, "Now I know you're just bluffing."

Taeyong rolled his eyes, "Come here and shut that mouth, I'll show you I'm not." It had to be the way his voice growled that made you suddenly get out of your seat and stand before the man. It's easy for you to be flustered but it's also easy for you to obey someone that shows more dominance and Taeyong- well he was just overflowing with it.

"We're gonna have a little fun, yeah?" He smiled devishly, "You trust me right?"

"Y-yeah, I m-mean we are f-friends."

Suddenly, your body was bent over the table and your wrists were bound by Taeyongs hand. If you wanted to escape, Taeyong wouldn't let allow it, so you were locked in place.

God, the way this position impacted Taeyong to the point where he just wanted to fuck you all day and night. With your skirt barely hiding your pretty pink panties, he could easily get off by himself at the sight. He didn't need to do that though, he had you after all.

"Did he touch you?" You hear him say, voice low and frightening, enough to paralyze you from moving and speaking. But to his dismay you didn't answer. Moreover, hesitated to answer because of the tone he used. "I asked you a question." He growled, "Did. He. Touch. You."

A soothing hand ran up the sides of you skin, it was cold, almost like a vampires touch compared to your warm skin. "Y-yes."

Taeyong stopped, "Where?"

"Why does it matter?" You say, finding your confidence again though that won't last since your bent over the table with your ass in Taeyongs face.

"I dont want you to remember his touch, only mine. So I'll touch any place he touched." He continued touching where he could reach, the hand binding your wrists let up and rested on your ass as if about to spank you. "Now answer me."

You grumbled and arched your back as a way to tell Taeyong to shut up and fuck you. The pain of something not filling you up was unbearable, you even thought about slipping your fingers inside dripping cunt for relief. "Stop asking me questions and fuck me please."

"God you're so annoying." He spoke. "Im not going to fuck you until you tell me. It shouldnt be that hard since you're so confident." Taeyong pulled you up by your hair and forced you on his lap where your back was pressed against his chest. You couldnt look him in the face, too afraid that you'd break into a blabbering mess.

"H-he touched m-me," you grab Taeyongs hand with hesitation and placed it on your panties that covered your leaking hole, "here."

Almost positive Taeyong could feel your juices soaking through your panties, you pulled your hand away letting his own linger where you needed him most.

"What did he do when he touched you here?" His middle finger went along the slit of your cunt, dragging up and down gently.

"N-nothing."

He crooked his head before pushing your panties to the side and dipping two fingers in, "He didn't do this?" As you body arched into him, he was able to go deeper and finger you slow enough that you were sure it was teasing. And the pain of wanting to be filled up slowly disappeared but not enough.

"N-no, he d-didnt." As he began picking up speed, you cursed a threw your head back. You cried for more, struggling to stay still in his lap and his fingers worked magically inside you.

Taeyong loved every second of this. To finally see you melt in his arms literally when you could so easily turn him down for this. And he'd like to think he was the only one who could make you feel this way. Make you whimper and whine and call out to him for more. He was the only one for you.

"Please T-Taeyong, i want you to f-fuck me so bad," with a third finger slipping inside you, you moaned uncontrollably at the pace. Though you weren't stuffed like you would be with his dick, it was obvious Taeyong knew how to work his fingers to make you act this way. "Please, please, please..."

"Where else did he touch you?" He ignored your please.

It irked you how he didn't bat an eyelash at your desperate self. If you had your confidence again, you would have taken his dick out and sat on it without a question, even so you knew Taeyong wouldn't allow it just yet. He wanted you to fall apart before he even started.

"Mmm Taeyong-" you moaned with content as his fingers curved against your walls, "H-He touched m-my ch-chest."

Taeyong bit the inside of his cheek trying to hide the smirk that formed, "Guess ill just do the same." His free hand worked its way to your mounds where he proceeded to grope you and brush over your sensitive buds. The combination of his fingers inside you and his hands fondling your boobs was sure to bring your to an orgasm soon.

"Youre so beautiful." Taeyong mumbles into your ear, "so fucking perfect."

As carefully as can be, his fingers pulled out of you as a string of your slick connected to his three fingers.

So delicious, Taeyong thought, everything about you was so delicious.

You were flipped around so you faced Taeyong. This time, you didn't look away from him or hide your face from him. Instead, you maintained eye contact with the pretty boy below you before you suddenly pulled him into a desperate and needy kiss.

His heart beat faster than before. His ears burning as his face was flushed. You kissed him. You, the girl that he's been crushing on for years finally kissed him. It only took his jealousy to make this all happen.

"You don't understand how much I love you," he unbuckled his belt, "I cherish every minute and every second I spend with you," soon his pants were unbuttoned, "I can't stand seeing you with someone else," He slipped his dick inside of you with ease, a moan falling from both of you, "Even if you don't love me back, I still fucking do."

You couldnt find words to speak. Your mind was running but not thinking. If you spoke, you weren't sure if it'd be babbling or moaning because of how hard Taeyong fucked up into you. "I-i lo-" No, you couldnt say it back, not while being fucked into a whole new galaxy.

Taeyong on the other hand, was anxious yet pounded into you, enough to bring tears to your eyes. He wanted you to speak, he wanted to hear those three words come out of your mouth, but all he got was your adorable moans and sighs. Yet he wasn't complaining, they sounded lovely apart from the skin against skin. He's just overthinking.

"Youre doing so well, baby." His voice slowly fading, you were so lost in the feeling that anything Taeyong said, went out the other ear.

"F-feels so g-good. Want m-more..." Your greedy hands tugged at Taeyongs locks, but you weren't the only one being touchy. Taeyong was also kneading the plush skin of your ass, giving small taps before digging his nails in, making you whimper.

"Youre so needy baby, huh? So cute and needy for me." He slapped your ass playfully. The smirk on his face was evident that he loved every second of this.

"F-fuck yes, i-im so needy f-for you." You cry, "Youre t-the only one who c-can make me f-feel t-this good."

Of course he is. And Taeyong couldn't be any happier hearing that from you. It gave him energy to fuck harder while now holding your hips still like you were his personal toy. You struggled with keeping the hold on his hair. Your light tugs now harsh pulls but Taeyong didn't mind, in fact he liked how his head was forced to look at your beautiful face.

"Pretty girl." He leaned over the slightest bit and sucked on your necks sweet skin as you tried bouncing on his cock along with him thrusting up. "How much do you love this cock?" He questioned against your neck.

"S-so so much, Taeyong!" Your hips stutter and you know youre close but refuse to faulter, "Y-you h-have the best c-cock."

Taeyong moved back from your neck and grabbed your chin, "Are you ever going to let that guy touch you like that again after this?" You shook your head quickly. "Good girl."

"Im g-gonna cum." You say and without a single thought or word, your body shook as pleasure washed before you. Still, though Taeyong was on the edge of cumming himself, he kept the quick pace from before. But you were so sensitive from the orgasm, and even started screaming Taeyongs name. It wasn't pain, but pleasure, very sensitive pleasure that could easily make you cum a second time.

Seconds before you were about to feel another wave, Taeyong shot his seed deep into you, thrusting slowly as he came down from his high.

"D-did you mean what you said?" Taeyong breathes heavily and raises his brow in question, "About you loving me."

"Duh. I love you, idiot. I wouldn't say that if I didn't mean it." He rolled his eyes. That's the Taeyong you knew. "And what about you? Are you gonna say something or leave me hanging."

"I l-love you t-too." You say quickly. "I mean it."

Taeyong smiles a real smile before patting your head like a puppy and lifting you off his dick, "Lets get you cleaned up, baby, then we can talk about planning a date."

"A date??"

"Mhm," he smirked, "but not after a round two."

[rat-spit-village]

i dont wanna be rude but what was so hard to understand abt katriels character 😭

not rude! but since u asked:

(stolen throne spoilers under the cut)

(...this is a fucking essay. i'm so sorry)

who is she and what does she want

why does she agree to deliver maric to meghren? money? is it even specified? and if it is money, is it really worth the three plus years she spends trying to hoodwink this dude? does she get a stipend as that’s happening? a kind of medieval wire transfer? and if so what the fuck could she want to spend the money on? we don't learn anything about her that could help to answer these questions so we have no understanding of her drive or motivations

the original mission is to deliver maric to meghren. for what purpose? to be a prisoner of war? to be tortured and mocked in front of the masses? it isn’t outwardly explained, maybe because the details were intended to be too gruesome to write, or to leave the reader’s imagination to fill in the gaps. does she even know? does she care? i'm going to assume no on both these counts, but it isn't explained, which is wild. her thoughts on this would have been pretty interesting considering the fact that she immediately engages in an intimate relationship with the guy

it's hinted that katriel has seen some shit, which makes sense as she's an elf living in an oppressively racist culture. so maybe she's just trying to survive right? but that makes no sense because if she's acting out of survival alone she could have easily have sacked off working for severan (who aggressively threatened her upon their first meeting) the moment she stared into maric theirin's dreamy little himbo eyes and he took her under his protection no questions asked

switching sides ft. kissy smoochy maric time

normally i’m fucking HERE for -betrayer- falling for -betrayed- storylines (see: solavellan) but we didn’t see most of their relationship so it was lost on the reader. [mr gaider, you get one point for the moment where maric reads a sign over her shoulder in the deep roads. that was cute and i liked it. but that’s it, that's the only time i felt anything positive about these two together]

we’re shown the first night they sleep together, and then maric elaborates on their relationship months (?) later, at which point they’re in love with each other i guess

[as a side - their initial romantic moment where she shows up in his tent was clumsy as hell. i can excuse this bc they’re both meant to be quite adolescent at this point and to be fair people their age aren’t as suave as most writers make them out to be. so i guess i’ll accept it. but isn’t she meant to be a stupidly impressive bard? maybe she just picked up the himbo vibes and decided she didn’t even need to try. i guess i can’t hold that against her either]

the inciting moment she decides to defend maric, saving his life: why? why is killing him outright so unthinkable but delivering him as a prisoner is totally fine? that’s literally worse? if she’s already catching feelings i would have thought she would be relieved because it makes his demise quick rather than dragging it out in a disgustingly sadistic fashion? this isn’t the pragmatic, wash-my-hands-of-it character she’s been hinted at being, nor does it really explain an understandable change in her character

THE SEVERAN MOMENT. WHAT THE FUCK MAN

following on from the section above: she travels all the way to see severan after her redemption arc (? i’m assuming it’s supposed to be a redemption arc), paralyses and taunts him and then deliberately leaves him alive and stewing in rage. here’s the million dollar question folks: for the love of fuck why did she do this. why didn’t she kill severan? why didn’t she kill severan. why! didn’t she kill severan! for fucks sake. this is literally the dumbest moment in the book and i have to stress to you that maric theirin is the featured main character. something has gone wildly wrong here.

is it that she’s meant to think killing is wrong? she says some shit like ‘i didn’t kill you… remember that’. like. ??????? aren't you an assassin? why have you changed your stance on this? where has this idea that killing is wrong come from? cause it didn't come from your *war general boyfriend*. just fucking kill the dude. literally what is stopping you! i'd love to know! because it's fucking incomprehensible characterisation!

at this point, she claims to love maric. so why don't you go ahead and kill the man who is intrinsically responsible for plotting his death? earn your loyalty that way, rather than just messing with him and making him mad and then leaving. she just went up to a hornet’s nest, kicked it, and then left a handy note for the swarm saying ‘maric rules meghren drools’. if she could have returned with news that she’d just assassinated meghren’s right hand things would have probably ended differently. and holy shit wouldn’t it have been nice if things had!

tldr: katriel as a character makes no sense. probably because she is a purely utilitarian character who was written entirely to set up the climax of the book, trigger development in the other characters, and to make square pegs fit in circular holes. also she's a woman! well done david you did it again

[lombredanslaeu]

4.15 pm | jung jaehyun (with mentions of johnny suh) | smut

this is a bit long so brace yourselves.

for some reason, you unexpectedly got closer with jung jaehyun. you assumed it was because of your shared taste in music or your fondness of old vinyl records. whatever it was, it was him you’re always leaning to when you have something you want to talk about.

whenever one of the guys asked you to hang out in their dorm, it was always johnny that opened the door for you. there was no point in denying that johnny is one hell of a handsome man. and all those moments where he showed just how kind he is whilst looking like the way he is, gave you a series of fluttering butterflies and blushed cheeks.

and you didn’t like that.

“you have to help me.” you announced to jaehyun as you entered his room.

“what crime did you commit?” he answered, scooting over to one side of his bed to give you space to lay on to.

you placed your school bag and the paper bag of food he asked you bring down before sitting next to him.

“i think i’m in love with johnny.” you said.

jaehyun only raised his eyebrows at you. you groaned in frustration before falling your head into his pillows and covering your face with his blanket.

“oh,” he started. “you want me to set you up with him or something?”

“no.” you answered. “i cant fall in love with johnny.”

“why not?”

“i know you guys are still on dating ban. i care so much for his career because he worked so hard to be where he is now. i just cant.” you rambled.

something stirred deep inside jaehyun. he understands you but he quite dont know how to help you. he doesn’t have any suitable friends outside of the industry to set you up with. his close friends are all either from nct, members from other groups born in the same year as him, or acquitances from high school he barely knows about.

jaehyun came to the conclusion that he cant help you find you replace johnny. what he can do, however, is help you forget about him.

“i have an idea.” he spoke after a minute of silence. you gave him a look to say his idea.

with you laying comfortably beside him on his bed, it wasn’t a hard position for him to kiss you. the second you felt his lips touch yours, your body became rigid with shock.

jung jaehyun is kissing you. and you were in no position to deny him.

after about three seconds of shock, your hands found themselves tangled with his hair. you know he likes having his hair played with and with that knowledge, you gave a light pull at his strands. the action made jaehyun pull back a little bit to moan lowly. you had no idea this man could have this effect on you. perhaps, you were so caught up with johnny that you never had the chance to recognize how hot jaehyun can be.

you sat up to straddle his lap. his hands roamed all over your body. he yearned to touch you for so long now. the sight of you, straddling him was enough to make jaehyun rock hard.

“how is this supposed to help me forget about my feelings for johnny?” you inquired between kisses.

“don’t say his name for now.” his breathing became heavy as his hand placed itself behind your neck to keep you from breaking free from kissing. “don’t even think about him.”

he wasted no time moving his free hand up and down your thigh. he thanked your university for having a skirt as a uniform; although he hated thinking about you walking home alone at night with that short pleated skirt. so, he wanted to claim your legs by making you feel his warm hand all over them.

you moved your lips all over his jaw and neck. jaehyun’s smooth skin enticed you in giving him a few red marks here and there. he rolled his head back at the sensation of your soft lips making their way down his neck - something he daydreamed about more than he could ever admit.

“i don’t like being on top.” you announced as you broke free from his neck. jaehyun didn’t like you being on top as well; that position wasn’t something he had in mind. snaking his arm around your waist, he hovered his body over yours so you could fall back into the mattress.

you went on and on with your intense and deep lip-locking, only breaking away to remove your clothing. once your breasts was free of any restraints, his hand immediately fondled them. jaehyun’s touch was so addicting that you’re starting to forget that there are other people living on his floor.

his lips moved on from your tasty lips down to your neck. you moved your head back to give him more access. each kisses sent a shiver down your spine and towards your clothed core. one of his hands supported his weight while the other traveled through your stomach and down your panties. your eyes shut close as your lips exposed a loud moan when his fingers found your clit. jaehyun’s blood rushed down his cock when his fingers felt how wet you were. he knew he wanted to taste you now.

“i want to make out with your lips.” he said. you lifted yourself a little bit to catch his lips with yours. but he confused you when he didn’t let you kiss him. pushing your chest back down to the mattress, he placed soft kisses all over your stomach. “not those lips.”

you watched him remove your underwear, fully exposing yourself to his eager eyes. for a second, you remembered that he was your friend - a very hot one. as a reflex to the realization, your thighs involuntarily closed. his brows furrowed at your actions as his large hands pried them open a little roughly.

“i meant these lips.” he stated before his tongue licked a slow stripe to your folds. you arched your back at the feeling as your hands clutched his bed sheets. jaehyun was too excited to taste you that he immediately went to town with your pussy. as you were about to explode, he pulled away from your pussy. you whined at him and he only chuckled at you.

“i want to go down on you too.” you said, moving your palm to caress his covered member. he shivered at your action but shook his head in response.

“next time.” he replied. he hurriedly removed his underwear and located himself in between your thighs.

“i’m gonna fuck you so good.” his lips were right next to your ear as he whispered filthy things to his friend. you felt his tip stretch your entrance. you know jaehyun is big but you didn’t expect him to already feel so good with just his tip. “you’re gonna forget about anyone.”

with one smooth push, he filled you to the brim.

“oh my god,” you breathed out, overwhelmed with both pleasure and pain. no one else mattered to you at that point - only jaehyun.

he started with slow, controlled pumps. you figured he wasn’t the type to moan uncontrollably but he is one to grunt and growl after every push. as his thrusts became more sloppy, the louder your moans got. the tip of his cock hits your sweet spot each time and you don’t know how long you could last.

“oh shit, jaehyun.” you let out a little louder than you expected. his large hand covered your mouth as his pace became harder and deeper.

“be quiet.” he warned. “you’re only allowed to be loud if johnny is outside of this room.”

his warning didn’t get processed by your fucked out brain. all you could think about is how full and great you felt. you clenched around him, signalling that you’re about to orgasm. he took the hint and went faster than he could.

“cum for me, baby. let me know who can make you feel this good.” he said. the sultry tone of his voice made you clench around him tighter than before as you reached heaven. his hand was no match for your load string of curses.

as you came down from your orgasm, you noticed that he didn’t cum yet. he continued to thrust into you as he, himself, was unable to contain his moans. after one hard thrust, he exploded his cum deep inside of you. the warm sensation of his cum made you feel a second orgasm.

he slowly collapsed his weight on top of you. he gave your lips a kiss before falling on the space beside you.

“you still like johnny?” he asked.

with the feeling of his cum dripping down from your hole, you don’t think you could ever think about anyone aside from jaehyun ever again.

a/n: feedback would be highly appreciated! hope u like this.

[zuffer-weird-girl]

Anonimous said: Hi sweetheart, how are you? I hope you doing great. First of all, I’m a huge fan of you and I’m from Saudi Arabia I CAN’T STOP SMILING WHEN I READ A FANFICTION FOR U♥️. So if you don’t mind and the requests are open could we have something for Kai, Kaito, Kin, and Haru doing a pajama party cuz that is ANGEL B-day n she’s like these things? Sorry for my bad English. AGAIN THANK YOU BECAUSE YOU MADE MY DAY♥️

“You two want to do what again?” he sighed, one of his hands supporting his head with his elbow on his desk as his free one pinched his covered nose.

“A pj party!” Kin giggled as her older brother nodded at her, confirming to his father he also wanted the same thing.

“Why? You both know none your colleagues like to even step closer to the Hassaikai, is useless.” He gave an nonchantly look at Kaito when he facepalmed, mocking him surely the little brat, as Kin huffed and put her hands on her waist with a frown, reminding him very much of you.

Damn those brats took after both of you very well

“Dad..” Kaito groaned before pointing at the door with both arms “Is for mom’s birthday! She loves those things!” The boy exclaimed as he deadpanned.

“Don’t tell us you forgot!” Kin spoke with a cold tone of voice while glaring at him with a pout, matching gold orbs staring back at his own.

“I haven't.” he sighed, getting up from his chair and leavuing his office, his son and daughter following him like baby ducks, causing to a nearby precept to chuckle at the scene before yelping when he saw the death glare Chisaki gave to him over his shoulders. 

“Then you letting us do it then?” The nine year’s old boy asked, face same as his father but on his (E/c) coul be noticed a tinge of hope and happiness.

“Your mother is how many years older than you both again? The answer is no.” He said in sarcasm as he walked before sighing when his three year’s old daughter got on his front and sucefully stoped him on walking “What?”

“Papa pleasee??” she got her tiny and chubby hands interlocked together while doing the puppy eyes up at him “You can help us and say is a gift you also gave!”

“Absolutely not-” He growled and rolled his eyes up when she started to sniffle, then to help even more he felt a tug on his jacket, and when looking down he saw Kaito with a pout and the same look Kin carried.

Those brats knew it how to get to him, dammit it was the same look his wife gave it to him all the time and fucking succeded it. He had to remember to have a long, LONG chat with you later for this attitude of the kids.

“Do whatever you two want without messes. And your mother better like it.” he watched his son and daughter’s face lighten up and shout their thanks at him while running to whatever they were planning “NO running inside the house you brats!”

Just listening to his son and daughter’s gigglesgave a simple smile to the usual cold man as he shook his head and started to walk again only to be met with his wife, entering the house along with Chrono after she went out.

“Kai!” he watched you put the bags carefully on the ground to walk towards him witha bright smile, also noticing the quick greeting Hari gave to him before his daughter jumped and lauched on his leg with giggles.

“I see you wiped off the money I had on my credit card.” he said nonchantly as you giggled, letting him, one more time on that day, smile and touch your cheek with his gloved hand to carres it.

“Says the man whose not even once stop buying things. Hell Kai, not even me or the kids can’t look at something and yoy’re already grabbing and paying for it.”

“Is for a different reason, and with those brats I agree I have to come to a stop before they become spoiled pests.”

.

.

.

He was walking on the halls, finishing reading some of his paperwork until he heard some giggles, catching a bit of a blanket little thief run and enter one room of the house.

Cringing at the thought of that blanket slidding and catching all the dirt on the floor, he sighed before going after and opening the door.

"You brats better not make a mess of this-" he stopped abruptly when he saw the state the room was in... full of pillows, lanterns, blankets forts which btw he learned what it was from you.

It even had the freacking coffe table from the living room full of snacks.

"So one of you stole the table huh little rats?" He asked nonchantly as Kin poked her head out of the blankets and kaito looked at him over his shoulder.

"Hah?" The boy said monotonously before accidentaly using his quirk on a pillow. Causing to explode and the room be filled with feathers.

"That makes a great decoration Kaito-kun!" He arched one of his eyebrows at seing Chrono's daughter inside one of the first, putting on some Christmas golden lights inside of it.

"Haru." He nodded towards teh girl whose shyly gretted back and returned to her going "Ordered someone to help make your work? Kaito?"

"No way!" The boy exclaimed before getting up "Me and Kin invited her as well!"

"Yeah! Kaito has a bitty wittyy crushy on Haru-chan!" Kin singed while twirling the blanket on her fingers as Kaito gagged but soon scoffed, crossing his arms much like he would do.

Damn Kaito took after him shit-

"As long as none of you cause a mess that is not my problem." He sighed, turning his back at the kids and waving at them over his shoulder "Try to not destroy the house while I'm not looking."

"We wont!" Kaito huffer before picking the shattered pillow before frowning "uh... daddy?"

"What now..?" He grimaced before looking at the shy kid whose begrudily showed the torn out pillow on both his hands.

"Help..? I still cant control it that well..." the boy said in shame and he soften his eyes at the much familiar dark brow hair son of his.

"Give it here." He sighed while crouching down and grabbing his son's hands while one of his free one had on the pillow "Concentrate on what form you want it, and how the pillow was before you used your quirk on it."

It was quiet until he saw the two girls looking in interest as he deadpanned.

"Isn't the surprise suppose to be ready until my wife comes here?"

"Right!" Haru yelped and grabbed the rest of the lights. He noticed the anticipation of his son to also help so instead he used his own quirk to put it back together.

"Huh?" Kaito noticed before being patted on the head.

"Go on. We can have lessons all the time, but your mother's birthday is only one time at the year so." He commented nonchantly as (E/c) eyes widened and shined as a little but bright smile appeared on the boy's face as he let out a happy giggle when Kai got up.

"Thank you daddy!" The boy said cheerfully before joining the girls and helping them with the lights since he was the tallest out of the three.

His gaze remained on them for a little before scoffing and going back to his work.

When he had became so... soft over two brats and one kid that wasn't even his own?

He grimaced and shaked his head to rid his head of this thoughts and returned to his office.

.

.

.

"I'm so tired..." you sighed while taking your heels off aa Kai stared at you.

"Dinner wasn't of your liking?"

"No no, it was amazing but you spared too much money as always." You giggled while hitting your head on his chest as he carresed with his gloved hand your hair.

Usually after a dinner, especially on your birthday he would... take you to the bedroom and... well, you know.

Ut just when he was about to kiss your neck after pulling his mask down he remember immediately the work his kids and Haru had done. Grimacing, he had to be strong to push his selfishness and lost aside to cup your cheeks to leave one passionate kiss. Enough for him to leave your head quite dizzy.

"Woah.." you whispered as he smirked, pecking your forehead as you pouted "Not going to continue what you started handsome?"

"Sadly, it seems like you have plans already." He sighed while walking and montioning for him to follow you.

"Huh? I don't have any? Or do I?" You followed him as he gave three knowns with the back of his fingers on a door.

"The brats have you for the night." Was the only thing he could muster before your son and daughter threw themselfs at you as Haru laughed but from some safe distance before going to you; on the ground by the way, your kids werent gentle; and giving a cheerful happy birthday along with the Chisaki twins and a hug.

"Woah!" You giggled before sitting up, Kin, giggling, and Kaito, smirking, on your lap "So that was the surprise you two hinted earlier?"

"We were actually scared that papa was going to tell you!" Kin exclaimed while climbing off from your lap and grabbing your hand.

"Yeah since he always fights with us to get you." Kaito mumbled before helping you up, smirking at the glare Kai had on him.

Little sh-

"So I-Oh my god you three did that?!" You exclaimed when you saw the room decorated as Kin nodded fervently before Kaito begrudilly pointed at Haru.

"Haru did most of the decorations..." the girl laughed before smilling up at you.

"I dont even know what to say kids.." you said with a smile as he sighed.

"I will let you four be for now. Anything just go to my office." He ignored your asking if he wasn't going to stay because he knew what was going to happen.

He didn't wanted Kaito or Kin to comment why he was hiding a toy on the middle of his pants.

He crossed paths with chrono, whose seemed torned out with something.

"Kai thank god." The male sighed before looking around "Have you seen Haru? I couldn't find her all day."

"She hadn't told you she was going to spend the night with my own pests and my wife? They literally stole her from the night." He commented nonchantly as Kurono face palmed.

"I forgot about that." He growled as Kai shook his head.

[mayraki]

IM SO EXCITED IVE COME WITH THEORIES HOPE YOULL ENJOT IT HERE WE GO

They’re saying it’s Lady Loki but I dont think she is. Someone said that she might be Sylvie Lushton - an enchantress- in the comics she’s a teenage girl made sorceress by Loki. She’s from Oklahoma -where they went to catch other Loki variant-

Now I don’t think any kind of Loki would say ‘I have SHIT to do’. Cmon, our boy has he’s own quality he’s no man to say something like ‘shit’ tell me if I’m wrong

And the way he says ‘I’d never treat myself like that’ and the presumed to be lady loki not wanting to be called Loki??? I’m mean variant or not it’s STILL Loki, why would she hate that? Maybe she’s acting like she’s Loki so TVA will blame everything on Loki while she reach her goal -whatever that is.

Anyway I’m soooo curious about where did they go, And I hope mobius won’t feel betrayed I LOVED LOKI AND MOBIUS TOGETHER SO MUCH I’m pretty sure he’s gonna left some hints for him to find aghhh it’s so excited!!!!!

BESTIE I LOVE THIS YES PLS ALWAYS COME WITH THEORIES

i mean for the way she uses her powers it does remind me of an enchantress 🤔🤔🤔

that kinda makes sense tho. pretending to be someone else. there has to be a reason why she hates being called loki, i mean, your name IS loki... either something happened to her or she isn’t lady loki. if she’s sylvie it makes sense to hate people calling you loki if that’s not your name. maybe if that’s her, she found out that people were thinking she’s lady loki and went with it, that way, reaching your goal would be more easy if people don’t really know what you’re truly capable of. MARVEL EXPLAIN 💳💥💥💥💥💳💥💥💥💥

i want loki and mobius to have an enemies to besties kind of thing, can u imagine both of them together as a team? funny and smart af. loki being chaotic and wanting to do his thing while mobius just tries to follow the rules and keep loki on the ground. THAT IS THE BEST KIND OF CHAOTIC TEAM PLS.

LOKI CANT HAVE HER AS A SUPERIOR LOKI SO HE PROBABLY WENT WITH HER TO SEE WHAT THE FUCK SHE WANTS AND LEAVE LITTLE HINTS SO MOBIUS CAN FIND THEM, or like pretend to help her but at the end he betrays her and goes back with mobius, i mean, he IS the god of mischief, he always has something under his sleeve CMON IM SO EXCITED TOO

[thethirteenthcrow]

Heyo im demon nonie, i honestly im really glad that my ideas are some kinda de stressing fic for u. Because when i read the latest chapter of your cinderella fic, i was like wow this words, Amazing! Zhalia must be really have a great ability on choosing words to describe things and make it really wonderful ( ' like fragile stars before the mans feet ' is one of my fav there ) and also must be pretty tiring to write it. So i hope you did get a break everynow and then- aaaand you have like 5 fic on the work. Like take a break! Take care of yourself! I love you writing so much but i can wait. Sending you lots of love.

Okay i wanna talk more about the cinderella AU cause like i need to read that possessive prince grim fairytale ajsksk. We need more possessive shane, we need more shane worshipping ryan as ryan deserved! We need them good ol kisses everywhere on ryan body. Or just me idk.

For the demon fic, i think im done with all the writings. Damn its been awhile, i dont remember much of what i write ahskdk. I dont mind, you dont have to send me the thing i write. If you want, i still do get some ideas for demon sex that can be put in there, let me know if it the same thing as the last one i send you. Ahdkdk. If that is okay of course?

Thats all!

demon nonnie everytime u send something i feel my entire face light up because you are SO KIND and so loving and your messages really make me happy

and thank you so much for the compliments on my writing? i really don’t... think it’s special? but hearing these words from you means a lot to me. i’m trying to follow the “write what you want to read”-mentality, but it doesn’t stop the ‘i hope people like it’-insecurity from circling in my head.

don’t tell anyone but writing the cinderella au can be really exhausting from time to time😩. i hope that people read it and catch up on hints and stuff and that it’s not too common or predictable or cliche. (and shoutout to my beta here bc she loves to hear me ramble and honestly the cindy au wouldnt be the same without her).

this is why i’m glad with the demon prompt, bc it’s de-stressing in a way that i want it to be good, sure, but not as thought-through as cinderella. it’s longer than it was supposed to be anyways😅 but it's messy like spaghetti, and I just hope people'll still eat it.

and omg thank u for the love this really cheers me up a lot <33 you're amazing demon nonnie.

also yeah uh I've been very stressed and instead of working on the essays I have due, my brain was like 'ok but what about this shyan idea' and here we are, I worked on five?six? fics last week. someone send me help lmaaooo. I usually would've hit my writer's block by now, but instead I just keep! on! writing! since when do I have all this content in my fingertips Jesus.

------------------------------

OKAY AND RE:THE OG FAIRYTALE, here's a quote that made me feral (and come up with the au in the first place). context: it's the first night, and poor, poor cinderella got a dress from the hazel tree at her mother's grave, went to the festival and no one recognises her.

The prince approached her, took her by the hand, and danced with her. Furthermore, he would dance with no one else. He never let go of her hand, and whenever anyone else came and asked her to dance, he would say, "She is my dance partner."

but that's not where it ends! this is night two:

When Cinderella appeared at the festival in this dress, everyone was astonished at her beauty. The prince had waited until she came, then immediately took her by the hand, and danced only with her. When others came and asked her to dance with them, he said, "She is my dance partner."

and that's not where it ends! this is night three,

When she arrived at the festival in this dress, everyone was so astonished that they did not know what to say. The prince danced only with her, and whenever anyone else asked her to dance, he would say, "She is my dance partner."

like bro!! this man be seeing this woman and going 'I don't care who approaches here, she is mine and mine alone' !!! excuse me !!!

when I read this, I stg I whispered 'possessive' to the darkness of my bedroom and my brain was like: did you mean: Shane Madej? and now we're 30k in a cinderella au. and uh, regarding the marking? well, all I'll say for now (I haven't written this yet but I have it planned), Shane knows how to take care of his mysterious though beautiful stranger.

and lastly regarding the demon prompt, right now I think I've got a nice plan for summoning ii? my beta to whom I scream about everything, said "I love it so fucking much" and after reading the outline, "I... Am so horny" so I THINK that's good news. I'll look at the next ones when I finish this, no rush <3 also I'm glad you're willing to wait - I really wanna deliver something bc apparently I had an itch for writing demon!Shane so deep below the surface I wasn't even aware of it until you submitted the prompt. I'm eternally grateful!

whew! what along rant! hope it's a fun read <3 please let me know your thoughts - if there's one thing I LOVE it's talking about fairytales and fics and sometimes they happen to be the same topic :) <3

x Zhalia

[maddestmewmew]

first impression: u were like one of the first anons and u were HYPE which made me HYPE and when i realized what Teub was a mispelling of i was like oh they funny 2 now: oh? ur a bitch? a fool? go bri ish boy go, sing karkalicious /j but srsly i care u so much weve been friends for 6 years and in that time youve been just consistently SO funny and so nice and honestly? when you me and mosca are on calls late at night and we all just feed each others chaos like a terrible feedback loop? 🥰🥰🥰

(puttjng this at the top bc woo boy yhis answer is a long one first impressions/current impression)

HFJDU YEA I FORGOT HOW EXCITED I WAS ALL THE TIME!! that!!!! hasnt really changed huh!

anyway i think im legally required to type all of karkalicious from memeorh but as british now. actually wait ill do it as imposter nelpeta :)

:33 < LISTON UP WYOMIE, THIS SHIT IS OIRONIC! MR SIMPS BEATS ARE BEST SUITED TO BRITS HOOKED ON PAW-NICS! NELPETLICIOUS DEFINITION MAKES WYOMIE LOCO! THEYRE TRYING TO KNOW THE SEVERET THAT THEY CAHNT SENSE IN MY TIDDIES DOIN' JUHST TO KNOW WHOS IMPOSTA' OI AIN' DOIN XEM NO FAVAHS' NO REASE ON WHY I TEASA FLUSH JUS COMES AN' GOES LOIKE SEA SONS IM NELPALICIOUS SO DELICIOUS NO OI DON' D O KISMEISIS AN IF YOU READ AN' E FANFICS ALL THA' SHIT IS PURE BOLLUCKS! I EAT CREWMATES (moshch) DON' MA'AH IF WE A' MOIRAILS CREW BE RUNNIN' LIKE A RACE FOR A CHANCE TO PUNCH MY FACE

IM NELPETLICIOUS. SUPAH BRI'ISH! IM NEPETLICIOUS. LITERALLY JUST BLOOD THIRSTY! IM NELPETLICIOUS. NO' EVEN MR SIMP WANTS OF PICE O' ME OIM NELPETLICIOUS L-L-L-LIKE GARBAGE! GARBAGE!

NELPETLICIOUS-NELPETALICOUS- GOD DAMMIT STOT STOP FUCKING AROUND W MY MIKE INNIT-

NELPETLICIOUS DEFINITON MAKES THA' SHIPPERS CRAZY. THE SERVAHS ALWAYS SCREAMING CUTSEY SHIP NAMES LOIKE FRIENDS/COWORKERS IM THE N TO THE E TO THE L P E T A AND LICHRALLY NO SHIPS NOW IBCLUDE ME! IM NELPETLICIOUS (fish delicious) MOI BODY STAYS..loike supah bahd ac tully ALL THA CREW'MEMBAS STRAIGHT UP ACCUSING ME OF FAKING A HEALTH CONDITION?? WYOMIES MY WITNESS! (whistle) BE' THA' SHIP CURLS MISTAH SIMPS...uh....bandana?? AND THEYLL BE NEE'IN OLL THA INHALERS CUZ OIMA MAKE ZEM WELL....you know ;) (LOIKE TAKIN A PROPA NAP AY WYOMIE?)

IM NELPETLICIOUS. SUPAH BRI'ISH! IM NEPETLICIOUS. LITERALLY JUST BLOOD THIRSTY! IM NELPETLICIOUS. NO' EVEN MR SIMP WANTS OF PICE O' ME OIM NELPETLICIOUS NOW YOU WANKA'S HOLD THE FOCK UP. CHECK IT OUT.

BABA BABA BAYBAAAA IF YOU REALLY WONT THE IMPOSTA. HONEY GET SOME PATIENCE MAYBE THEN YOLL CATCH A HINT. IM SO BRI'ISH BRI'ISH! IM CURRENTLY BEINF POSSESSED BY AN ALEIAN OH GOD OH FUCK ITS MAKING ME CRAZY!

B TO THE R THE I T S H FO'KIN BRI'ISH B TO THE R TO THE I T S H FO'KIN BRI'ISH

OI TO THE M TO THE P O S T E R THATS ME TO THE OI TO THE M, TO THE TO THE TO THE TO THE (ill just spell it out for ya)

OLL THE TOIM IM MUHDHAING CREW GATHAS ROUN ALWAYS FOI'IN ME WANNA CATCH THE COLOR OF THEIR BLOOD. OIM JUS' WANNA SAY IT NOW I AINT' TROIYNA ROUND UP ANY DRAMA LI'IL CREWMATES I JUS' DONT WANNA BE COUGHT! AN' OI KNOW IM COMIN' OFF AS JUST A L'IL ANXIOUS although i keep on repeteung how tha se'crets fockin awesome BUT IM TRYNA TEEL! ITS A SECRET I JUST DONT WANNA TELL!

WYOMIE SAYS I SMELL LOIKE SHIT! SUPAH BRI'ISH! NO OI DON' DO KISMEISIS AND IF MEW RE' ANY' FANFICS OLL THAS ALL RUBBISH INNIT! OI KILL CREW MATES (stabby wabby) DON' MA'AH IF WE WAS MOIRIALS OH GOD SIMPS RUNNING DOWN THE VEIL GONNA HIT ME WITH A PAIL

4 3 2 FOCK YOU

MOI BO'Y STAYS SHITTY STOTS BEEN NAKIN' ME NEVOUS CUZ I. KILLED SOMEONE AND IT K N O W S INNIT. SEVENTWO IS A WITNISS! (OH FUCK) BE' THA' WILL FUCK ME UP IN THE FUTCHA INNIT! AND I GAVE MR SIMP A TOWEL BC i maybe a bri'ish catboy muh duh ruh bu' oi still say gay rights innit

SO DELICOUS! (crewwww membaaaaas seeee)

SO DELICOUS! (youuu conn trus meeee)

SO DELICOUS! (oill help mewwww beee)

SO DELICOUS! L-L-L-LIKE DEAD AS FUUUXK!

and the rest would he pretty much the same i think anyway if you managed to get this far AAAAA I FUCKING M E L T E D BRO DUDE MAN YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO BE A MEAN CYBERBULLY AND THEN TURN AROUND AND MAKE ME CRY FOR OTHER REASONS THOSE REASONS BEING NICE THINGS HHH LEMMIE JUST

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: I have THE most shockingly incredible news Carly: ? Ali: Someone you know Ali: someone very geographically close to you Ali: is leading a double-life Carly: I know my ma's fucking the bloke who works in the kebab place Ali: Hmm Ali: fair play Ali: a man who knows his way around a giant sword of meat is undoubtedly a plus Ali: but this is not about kebabs or adultery Ali: yet Carly: thats what i said after i told her what pegging is Carly: but k is it about 💊s? Ali: bless Ali: from the mouth of a babe Ali: nope, but think one of your other great loves Carly: aw its about you Carly: tell me tell me Ali: okay, okay Ali: but only 'cos you're the sweetest Ali: and I am 😻 Ali: cat lady has an antique shop! Ali: idk how I've not found it 'til now but it's so cool and you've got to come Carly: o thats so cute! Carly: all the 🐈s just on the shelves like 👀 Carly: she must have so many breakages tho 💔😿 Carly: u there now? Ali: RIGHT?! Ali: I nearly gave her a heart attack when I realised it was her Ali: like seeing a 🐅 in its natural habitat Ali: [imagine a hilarious selfie with a slightly bewildered old lady 'cos she's #buzzin] Ali: won't blame her beloved moggies but it is a bit of a mess Ali: party still tho, so come thru Carly: 😍😍😍 Carly: wtf @ her working there still shes like 400 Carly: not looking it from that angle tho 😘 Carly: where am i goin? Ali: she's the big boss lady Ali: 🤑🤑🤑 Ali: 'cept not, obvs Ali: it's a complete hidden 💎 Ali: hidden the operative, so just get to the main drag of the high street and I'll meet you 💚 Carly: yea?! aw love that for her & us Carly: scavenger hunts r so fun bye ma👋 Carly: ill bring mr darcy he's been trying to get in the hot tub all morning 😼 didnt have the 💜 to tell him hes not meant to like water Ali: exactly Ali: knew you'd get it Ali: won't blindfold you or nothing but maybe later Ali: awh, double date moment Ali: he's just tryna live up to his name is all Carly: 🔮 finds u baby or u find it Carly: ha ill make that maybe into a yea thats my 🔮 Carly: 💙🐅 & 💜🐈 aw cute Carly: thats why he's 😾 but 😽 yea? thats the 1 right? Ali: got it all in one, baby Ali: so smart Carly: my outfit choice gotta b some kind of 🔮 too 🌟 Carly: fate found me overalls like get ready bitch Carly: 🐇 Ali: ready to work and werk Ali: that's my girl Carly: ha Carly: can't have u looking like that & me Carly: idk but not 👼 level Ali: psh Ali: impossible Carly: ur a 🍑 Carly: but we're still honeymooning Ali: life's a honeymoon with you and me, doll Ali: neverending summer, yeah Carly: u kno Carly: any hot customers that come through the door better only have 👀 for the other 🐈 Ali: 🐈 gets 'em in the door, they gotta stay, and more importantly pay, for the bargains Ali: that's my business plan anyway Ali: not sure how she's rolling, only that she ain't rocking Carly: & no more breakages thats mine ha Carly: dont have the shakes today its k but will be weak at the knees when i see u 💙 sorry colleen Carly: make sure u catch me yea 👼 Ali: 'course Ali: you're far too pure to ever be a 😈 Ali: the universe and I will never let that happen Carly: ur too nice Ali: nah Ali: just what you deserve Ali: well, I try Carly: ur the real 💎 Carly: & im happy we found each other Ali: me too Ali: never gonna lose each other again Ali: trust Carly: the universe & i will never let that happen Ali: 💚 Ali: forever means forever Ali: do you want anything, I'm just killing time Carly: im goin nowhere baby unless its w you 💫 Carly: idk water maybe Carly: not v rock & roll but i reckon maybe youll like me anyway Ali: adventures only club 🌌 Ali: I know I'll love you dope Ali: water it is Ali: strictly straight-laced plain ole h2o, no hint of party Carly: 💙forever i kno Carly: ha wot r u planning to spike it w? 👀 u Ali: WISH I'd found some really retro pharmaceuticals in all those old bottles Ali: wonder how coke ages like Ali: fancy Carly: if we find any i'll be your lab 🐇 Carly: but not today im 😵 Carly: 💔😢 Ali: 😢 now I'm thinking about animal testing Ali: no cages either Ali: we got work to do Ali: but you can take it easy babe, sweet-talk like only you can Carly: omg no 😭 we have to free every 1 🐇🐀🐁 no cages ever! 😠 Ali: that's a job for tomorrow Ali: we'll need posterpaint and balaclavas Carly: cute Carly: i kno lads who've got some we can borrow Carly: & 💪 if we need it too Carly: or 🏎 for the getaway ha Ali: they've got their uses Ali: that's for sure Ali: can we convince 'em to dress up like 🦍s for the cause Ali: obvs 😘 Carly: i can Carly: u could but id b 💔😢 like Ali: but what about my 💔? 😏 Carly: ur protected by the 🔮💫 Ali: yeah Ali: and I protect you Carly: yea u do Carly: we dont need the lads Carly: ur a🐅 Ali: 😊 Ali: what's going on at the zoo tonight tho Ali: any parties we need to be a part of Carly: johnnos home thats always good til the garda wanna welcome him back too ha Ali: party poopers Ali: we'll be gone before then Carly: gone 🏃 or gone 🚀💊 Ali: little from column a little from column b Ali: don't wanna share you for that long Ali: and I'm defs not sharing our spoils, either Carly: k Carly: i kno u said this place was hard to find but maybe im outside? Carly: idk it 👀s right Ali: omg 🗺📌 Ali: I'm still in the tescos getting us some lunch Ali: called Calico Jacks Ali: which is SO perfect Carly: !!! Carly: i knew this was the place 🐈👑🏰 Ali: the universe WANTED us both to find it today Carly: omg its so cute in here Carly: idc that im sneezing Carly: i love it Ali: right? Ali: she has some amazing stuff Ali: it just needs sorting out so people can 👀 it all for what it could be, not necessarily what it is rn Ali: once we've bagsied the best bits for ourselves, naturally Carly: i'll tell her its the comedown so she wont feel bad Carly: omg i just found the cutest 🐻😍😍 hes joining us for tea Ali: totally making this a picnic moment Ali: you've gotta name him/her Carly: yay Carly: kettles on baby 💙 r u nearly here? Carly: mayb ill have thought of a name by then Carly: cant rush if he has to go by it forever Ali: faster than you can sneeze boo Ali: exactly, names are very important Ali: so 🍀 he gets to pick his own Carly: aw lucky is a good name Ali: perfect Ali: I wonder if we can find him a suitable tea time outfit Carly: 😊😊

[unkooked]

absolute.

In which love isn’t your strong suit and Jungkook is a philosophy student who believes in fate for the first time in his life. 6,172 words. 

[jk is a cute and smart asshole and u are too tired™ for his shit. but u love him i guess lol]

notes: i started writing this in november and finally finished it. a lil angsty, fluffy, fun, etc. i really tried my best to mimic real emotion, as well as struggle. sometimes it’s not easy to give into love. sometimes love is slow. sometimes people change u for the better. this fic gets better!! dont stop after the first part that’s the worst one lol. it’s long but idk maybe you’ll like it, give it a chance :)) 

        What began as the simplest spark of intrigue was rapidly beginning to warp itself within your thoughts and infiltrate your sense of inner peace, not to mention it was spreading with the intensity and conceit of a wild fire. God, you really hadn’t signed up for this.

***

1.

You had seen him once.

The day had been groggier than ever before; skies that mimicked all that was dull and bland showered the ground beneath with a potency that seemed absolutely endless. The air was damp, and cold, and gut-wrenching, and though the city seemed to be screaming for even the smallest fraction of salvation, you found yourself in a certain sense of tranquility. And perhaps your day would’ve continued its soothing calm, that is, had you not decided to wear flip-flops on your commute to work.

“Mom, why’s that lady wearing pink slippers? She looks like a clown.” The voice of the little boy on the subway could he heard from across the train, and as soft giggles escaped the mouths of those around you, what some people may consider irrationality began to kick in.

           You’d woken up at 5am, for God’s sake—you were already running late from the long trial and error you’d suffered through with the new makeup set you’d bought. As simple as it sounded, you were tired. And the flip-flops were comfortable. To wear real shoes meant putting on a pair of socks, and high heels would only result in endless groaning and a marathon of foot cramps. Really, you were just trying to protect yourself. And what was wrong with that? Couldn’t people judge others from the ankles up? Wasn’t this the home of the free? Whatever happened to national security?

           You couldn’t imagine what horrid expression was etched upon your face, and quite frankly, you didn’t want to. But it must have been something truly revolutionary as the young man across from you couldn’t seem to control his shameless snickering.

This is when the irrationality seemed to be coming back to you. Maybe if you just ignored him, he’d piss off. Looking at him meant acknowledging his existence. Looking at him meant losing. But then he laughed again—and your eyes couldn’t help but catch a glimpse at his shadowy figure. And as much as you wanted your curiosity to yield just this once, you felt almost at ease that it hadn’t.

He was breathtaking . . . and annoying. Mostly annoying.

His eyes were sultry and dark in colour, the way the corners of his mouth dipped upward slightly was adorable. Had the loud laughter not fallen once again from his lips, perhaps you would have found yourself staring at him for eternity. Or, that is, until your stop.  You tried to avert your eyes, but suddenly the details of the whole situation started getting fuzzy, and his laugh might have been annoying, but damn, his smile was adorable. Handsome asshole.

Your mind was screaming at you. Look away. Look away. Look away.

But how could you tear your eyes away from a man that seemingly embodied both the fatality of eloquence and the beauty of self assurance. His presence was admittedly mesmerizing, and you would be lying if you said he didn’t have all your attention.

“Angry?” His voice rang softy.

You looked upward. Did he just say something? The sound overthrew your thoughts. Why were you angry again?

“Are you angry?” He repeated with a hint of amusement. “You know, at that kid?”

Right. That’s why. The brat.

“Incredibly.” You weren’t thinking. “This is slander.”

“Slander?” He was incredulous, and you were an idiot. “He’s like 6.”

Great. Now it looked like you hated kids.

“Yeah-Well… maybe he shouldn’t be saying things like that.”

He threw his head back against his seat and let out the smallest of laughs. Was it crazy to say it sounded melodic?

“You’re funny.”

“You’re perfect.” The words had left your mouth before your brain could even register the repercussions. His face had started with confusion, but was quickly twisting into something reminiscent of a smile. Before he could even ask, you leapt out of your seat and rushed toward the subway door. He seemed like he was going to follow, you shouted before he could even try.

“Sorry! This is my stop!” You were lying of course. But you couldn’t let him bother you.

Getting off one stop early and walking the rest of the way to work wasn’t nearly as overwhelming as suffocating in the discomfort of that conversation. For the first time in ten minutes, it felt like you could breathe. The subway was confined embarrassment, an utter death zone. But Manhattan was as Manhattan always is in the fall; filled to the brim and drowning in rain.

If you were lucky, maybe you would drown too.

***

2.

“You’re being dramatic.” Jessie etched mockingly, driving the night forward with a phrase you felt like you had heard for the umpteenth time.

“I’m not, Jess! I’m serious! It was completely embarrassing; I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Professor Frouckner went off on me because I was so late. I ran to class in flip flops. During a torrential downpour. Don’t you understand the pain I just went through? I-I could have frostbite for God sake. Or, or died, even!” At this point, you were flailing your arms in front of her face. There was a point to be made. Jessie just threw her head back laughing and rolled her eyes.

She reached across the table and grabbed your hand.  

“Yeah. Okay, so 1. You’re drunk. 2. You’re crazy. And 3, I’m gonna have to ask you to turn it down, sweetheart. Because that’s not at all how frostbite works.”

“I’m a law student; I don’t need to know the nitty gritty details on frostbite, okay? Hop off my dick.”  

“Wow. He changed you!” Jess replied in between giggles. You pursed your lips and took another swig of the drink in front of you. “What are you, [Y/N], a twelve year old boy? “Hop off my dick”, who the fuck says stuff like that? Are you okay? I’m concerned.”

The club was new and hot and bustling with students from all over campus, and therefore, the music was so loud, it was credulously easy tuning out Jess’ mom lecture.

“Maybe he drugged you,” her voice droned on. “Did he pass you a mysterious liquid?”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes, and before you could even begin to respond to the utter nonsense she seemed to be spewing, you saw the one person that had left you so mortified to begin with. The exact person you had gone out with Jess to forget about. Irony is a bitch.

A small gasp left your mouth as your throat began to grow dry. Immediately, you averted your gaze to the utensils on the table and pulled her in closer.

“Jess, stop talking. Now!” You whisper shouted, trying to hide your face from the intrusive stranger. Why was he here? Did he want to make your life hell? Did God think this was a funny trick?

“And now you’ve become rude too!” She continued. “Wow. I really hate this guy. Who does he think he is, honestly, he’s completely taken over your persona-,” before she could go on, you grabbed her hand and gestured behind her.

“He’s here!” You groaned aloud.

“He’s what?!” Jessie whipped her head around and gasped. She turned back to you with wide eyes and a wider smile to match. “He’s hot? You didn’t tell me, he was hot! Ohmygod, this is exactly what you need. A cute boy to distract you from your life problems!”

“Jessie, he is my life problem! Now stop looking at him! He’s gonna notice us!” You replied sharply, using your margarita to cover your face.

“I can’t help it. He’s so good looking. Why aren’t you more excited? This is fate, [Y/N]. Did you read your romance horoscope this morning? This is your man! How are you not gawking at him right now?”

“Jessie. Stop. Staring,” you grit through clenched teeth.

His eyes flickered to your table and you nearly felt your heart drop to the pits of your stomach.

“He can tell! He can totally tell! Look somewhere else, you jerk!”

“God, you’re so dramatic! The only way he’d be able to see us right now if I stood up and shouted at him from across the room.”

Her face twisted into a crooked smile and immediately you felt your stomach clench and your eyes widen.

“Jessie,” you tried to reason. Key word, tried. “Please don’t do this.”

“You, my friend, need to face your fears!”

“Jess, please, please don’t, don’t do it plea-,” your pleas had started, only to be ignored and replaced with the loud booming of Jessie’s voice over the music.

“Hey! Subway boy! Look over here! It’s her! From the Subway! This morning?! You remember? You’re cute! Come over here!”

You tried to jump from the chair and make a run for it but Jess grabbed onto your hand a second faster. “You’re unbelievable,” you hissed.

“You’re gonna love me for this one day. The day I introduced you to your husband!” She had a dopey smile on her face. You felt like jumping into a volcano.

“I already met him.” You shot back in frustration. “And it was bad enough the first time!”

“Well, you better shake that off, because he’s coming this way.”

“You’ve got to be joking.” You peered through the hair on your face and knitted your eyebrows in agony.

“And, I, am gonna head towards the bar. I’ll leave you two love birds alone, you know,” she winked. “To . . . get to know each other a little better.”

“Jess. Don’t leave me here. I will kill you. I’m serious. Not an ounce of me is joking right now. I will literally-,”  

“Erhhh.” She interrupted. “Wrong answer. I’ll see you later babe! The bar is calling!”

Before the string of curse words were even registered in your brain, you felt the smallest of taps on your shoulder.

Great. Now, this, was going to be an experience.

***

3.

“Hi.”

You gulped before turning around.

As you met eyes, you almost felt your voice catch itself in your throat again. He looked just as beautiful as he had this morning, his hair playfully swayed over his forehead and his eyes continuously peering into your own. While you seemed to be feeling apprehensive and unsure, he seemed to emit the absolute opposite.

In fact, he seemed to be glowing.

His eyes were wide and warm, welcoming even. His lips were turned upwards, adorning that same irritating smirk you had caught a glimpse of earlier in the day. There was nothing to say about his appearance other than the blatant obvious. He was absolutely gorgeous.

“H-hi,” you drew out, slowly. Your stomach was turning in its anxious wake, but also, you realized, excitement.  

“I’m Jungkook.” He reached his hand out.

Handshake? Who handshakes? That’s just weir-

“Or perfect. I mean, you can call me that if you like it better.” He quipped with a smug smile stretched across his face. You wanted to punch it off. Or kiss him. Either, or.

“You know,” the confidence in your voice surprised even yourself. “I thought you were handsome for about two seconds just now.”

The small smirk on his lips began to grow larger as he raised a single brow back at you.         

 “Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.” You repeated, crossing your arms and leaning back into the loft chair.

“What changed?”

You scrunched up your nose for dramatic effect. Because, clearly, theatrics were always important. You tilted your face slightly to the left. Jungkook waited in obvious anticipation, watching him squirm was almost amusing.

“You opened your mouth.”

Jungkook feigned hurt. He pretended to wince and held a hand to his chest, all whilst trying to shake off his laughter.

“Ouch!” He exclaimed. “You’re really out for blood, here, aren’t you? Are you always this . . .,” he struggled to find the right word.

“Witty?” You posed. “Hilarious? Eccentric? Creative? I think you’re definitely looking for creative.”

“Hmm. I was actually thinking bitchy.” He shrugged. Then he cracked that annoying smirk. God, you were really starting to hate that.

“Me? I’m a bitch? You’re the bitch!”

And that’s when he started laughing hysterically.

“Why are you laughing? You think this is funny, huh? You just call girls over; call them bitches and you feel happy with yourself?”

He put a finger up in his defense. “Actually, babe, you called me over here.”

Now, that, crossed a line.

“Don’t call me babe.” You grit. Who the fuck did this guy think he was?

“Chill out,” he rolled his eyes. “It’s a term of endearment. Have you ever heard of that word? You know, love, compassion, empathy? Are you familiar with any of those concepts?”

“Shut up, you asshole! I know love, okay? I’m not a dear person in your life, so-,” hop off my dick? “So just lay off.” You finished.

He nodded. “Yeah, well, not yet anyway.”

You felt like scoffing into oblivion. “Oh, you think you’re smooth, huh? You think you can just walk in here and say some douche-bag line you’ve prepared and it’s just gonna work out and I’m just gonna fall in love with you? Are you insa-,” before the final syllable left your mouth, Jess had already barged herself into the conversation.

“How’s it going lovebirds?” She chirped loudly, glaring at you with an intensity you’ve never quite seen before.

“Amazing.”

“Terrible.”

“Alright,” she clapped. “That’s what I like to hear!”

Jungkook moved toward Jess and put a single hand on her shoulder. He cracked a smile at you then looked back at her. “You know, I think your friend is really falling for me.”

“I’m going to PUNCH YOU-,” Jess clamped a hand over your mouth and began laughing awkwardly, threatening with her gaze alone whilst Jungkook stayed snickering in the corner.

“Don’t worry about her, she gets a little carried away when she’s drunk.” Jess was trying to diffuse the situation as much as she could, an attempt to put Jungkook at ease and save her friend’s reputation.

Little did she know, Jungkook wasn’t in distress. Not at all, quite frankly.

In fact, he was amused. This night had been more eventful than any night he’d had in the past couple weeks, most of which, were being spent preparing for his philosophy final he’d taken this morning. He’d seen a girl this morning on the way to his exam, a girl wearing ridiculously hideous pink flip flops. It had been enough to make him crack a smile and forget the weight on his shoulders that seemingly did not falter. For a few minutes, it had felt like his sole purpose was to sit there and laugh at her, as incredibly moronic as it sounded. But then again, he was taking philosophy. Analyzing life had singlehandedly take over his life. And this, as bizarre as it was, felt something reminiscent of a good omen. Maybe he was dreaming. But then again, dreams were good, weren’t they?

So when Jess awkwardly tried to mend the pieces of their chaotic conversation, he could only smile. And this time, it wasn’t his cheap and snarky way of making her blood boil. Rather, it was a sentiment of his curiosity. He didn’t know what would become of this, but he was more than willing to find out. This, her, it was something worth his attention. It was something that would blossom: for better or worse, at this point, he couldn’t tell. But he couldn’t help but be invested.

Jungkook wanted nothing more than to burst out laughing at her unfaltering insult slinging and boldly express his admiration for her; he wanted to tell her he liked this. That is, whatever this was. But something told him his growing optimism would be forced to undergo a series of pessimistic trials, i.e., her.

He liked her. He knew it. He didn’t want to believe in heavenly signs from the universe; he didn’t believe in love at first sight or in destiny or even soul mates, for that matter. Those things weren’t real, to him. Those were idealisms, thoughts, beliefs, they could be nurtured and mirrored and amplified, but they weren’t tangible. But this was something different. The quickening of his pulse was real, the escalades in his stomach were real, and the constant scrutinizing of what he said or what he did was real. To Jungkook, this wasn’t just an empty call from the universe meant to send a message. It was like a force of energy that beckoned him to take things a step further and pushed him to take action. He was more sure now than ever, that this, was a brutal awakening for was to come in the near future.

And so, he would wait.

He would play along. He would be the guy he needed to. He would do whatever it took to carry through this relationship and allow it to flourish the way it needed. Because this was deserving. Not to mention, annoying the shit out of her found itself to be an extremely entertaining past time.

Jungkook kept his smile tight. “Don’t worry about it.” He was quick to respond though his thoughts resonated somewhere else, somewhere deeper and distant. “I can’t judge the unstable, can I?” Then he winked.

“Unstable?” She bellowed incredulously.  “Do you ever shut up? Were you given love as a child?”

Jungkook wanted to throw his head back and laugh at the girl’s coherently bizarre behaviour, but the thought of getting decked in the face wasn’t so appealing, and so, he decided to take a more cautious route.

“Goodnight, [Y/N].”

He could hear her faint ramblings even as he as he was slowly walking away from the girls, letting lose the smirk that had begged so desperately to reveal itself, and for the time in a long time, he felt a shift of anxiety in his stomach. What, exactly, was this? Was it too soon to set his heart on her? Definitely.  

Jungkook hadn’t the smallest clue what was going on. But as much as this circumstance screamed dysfunction, there was an underlying sense of comfort that pulled him toward her, exhilaration, even. He wasn’t poetic or neurotic or an even a romantic, for that matter, and even in his second year of philosophy, Jungkook hadn’t thought of his life objectively, nor did he believe in fate. But this feeling he felt, this rush, this spurt of adrenaline, this beating of his chest, the sweating of his palms, the sheer intensity of his apprehension, this feeling held so much uncertainty—and yet—and yet the worlds fell so freely, and loosely, and smoothly from his mouth. He knew what to say, always. But how? How, when he was feeling somewhere between riding the best roller coaster of his life and walking a tight rope over impending chaos. His mind was blazing, stressing, obsessing; searching for meaning in the midst of the madness that had now become his life. Perhaps there was none.

Perhaps not.

4.

“So you’re just going to ignore me? I am literally sitting right beside you.”

“You don’t exist.”

“I definitely do.”

“Well, if I continue to pretend like you don’t exist, there’s got to be some truth to it, right?”

“No. Literally not at all. Have you heard of science, or-,”

“Shut up. Just shut up. Okay? You… you nerd.” The very little patience you had started your day with immediately began to grow weak. Firstly, thanks to the disgustingly painful hangover you were powering through, and second, well, Jungkook seemed to be making grandiose contributions to the irritability department.

“Wow. I think I’ve finally cracked the case, ha, get it? ‘Cause you’re in law?” Jungkook stifled one of his infamous laughs and regained his composure. “Yeah, anyways, you’re insane.”

“Thank you, Jungkook. You know what? That really pulls together a lot of missing pieces in my life. Thank you for your service. Goodbye.”

Jungkook ignored your attempts at escaping the conversation and averted his attention toward the subway.

“Hey, this is your stop right?”

Shit.

There was no way you were going to resurface the same havoc from getting off a stop early yesterday, not after Mr. Frouckner had torn you a new asshole with his mindless droning about punctuality.

“No, actually. The next stop is,” you coughed awkwardly. “…my stop.” Maybe if you spoke quietly, he wouldn’t catch on. That was your best bet.

“So…you lied yesterday.”

Best bet shot down. Nice to know the universe was on your side.

The blatant delight in Jungkook’s voice made the pits of your stomach churn. He was never going to let go of this. In fact, this is probably exactly what he yearned for: another instance he could mock and chastise you for. This was probably Jungkook’s ultimate dream.

“So I guess I left a stunning impression on you, huh?” You fought the urge to throw your bag at his stupid mouth.

“You know what?” You pursed your lips and looked outside the window. “Actually, this is my stop.”

The corners of Jungkook’s mouth were so often turned upwards, a surge of confusion went through you when you noticed his lips had gone from its usual crooked smile to somewhat of a pressed frown.

For a second, all you could do was look at him.

His eyes were narrowed slightly and he bit the inside of his cheek. His seconds of contemplation were enough to leave your stomach bouncing against itself.

“You can’t just walk away from your feelings.”

Jungkook’s eyes peered into your very own in a way that was utterly intrusive. His hair was tussled and messy, his skin shining behind the beams of fluorescent lights. Even with the simple pessimistic thoughts and urges of aggravation, your heart gravitated toward the soft echo of his voice. In a different world, maybe you could love this. In a different world, maybe you would overcome this constant constriction, this widespread fear that always seemed to manifest itself into every fragment of your life. This was new. He was new. He was different. Maybe you could trust him.

With a single step upward and the swaying of your body, you turned toward the subway doors and gulped.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Maybe it wasn’t time to take chances.

5.

“You’re going to this party.”

“Jessie. You’re my love, I love you, okay? But no. Definitely not.”

Jessie rolled her eyes for the thousandth time, and she paced through your room once more, arms folded across her chest with a clear motive on her mind.

“Well, Jungkook’s going to be there,” her voice rang coyly, and she gave you a sideways glance, hoping to lock you in her gaze and use her amazing powers of persuasion.

But your eyes were purposefully glued to the computer screen in front of you.

Jungkook’s name made your fingers tense, and instead of looking at your bestfriend and telling her you might have been feeling your heart shifting for a boy, you kept your eyes straight and kept your words short.

“Not interested, Jess. Next time.”

If human beings could display their emotions based on colour, you swore Jess was blazing and fiery red, as she shrieked in annoyance once again, throwing herself on your bed and screaming into one of your pillows.

“I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!”

“You’re being dramatic.”

“No, I’m not, bitch. I hate you, you’re the worst.”

“Jess—you know I don’t like parties okay? This doesn’t have anything to do with anything else—,”

“Anyone, you mean,” she corrected matter-of-factly.

You were almost compelled to pick up one of the pillows behind your back, and launch it at her face at 800 miles per hour. But, the thought quickly vanished, because you’re a merciful human being that believes in second chances.

“I’m going to ignore that because I think you’re going through a hard time,” you whispered while patting her back, and Jessie hissed into your pillows. Maybe she was going to hit you with a pillow at 800 miles per hour.

“[Y/N], stop playing dumb, okay? You know exactly who I��m talking about.”

God, when was this fucker going to stop being the highlight of all your personal conversations. You threw your head back and groaned.

“When are you going to understand that I don’t have feelings for him?!”

“When you can fucking go somewhere he’s gonna be at, without having a mental break, you shady bitch!”

Fuck it.

“Fine, I’m going!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

Jessie let out a laugh, and you soon followed, why did boys always make things so difficult?

“I’ll pick you up at 7.”

“I fucking hate you.”

6.

Yup. This was really happening.

“This place smells like fucking paradise.” You marveled at the immense expanse of broadly lit rooms and expensive luxury all around you. So this is what it’s like to get a sports car for your fifteenth birthday.

“Rich people, man.” Jessie shook her head and grabbed a drink off the stretch of wooden table, taking a large sip, and then placing it back down.

The house belonged to a friend’s of a friend’s of a friend’s, and it was by far the biggest house you’d ever stepped into in your entire life. It looked like it was something out of an elaborate Parisian getaway, but the crowds of drunken people swaying anything but rhythmically to Lil Pump made it more than clear that this was the epitome of college parties.

The dress you were wearing was Jess’, and it was itchy, bodycon, and far too thin to keep anybody warm on any winter night. But, it made you feel good, and so you supposed that was the most important thing as you walked across the house’s wide and echoing halls, anxious from the stares of those around you.

“Don’t look now,” Jessie whispered into your ear, and of course, immediately your head whipped around opposite of her direction to see what she was talking about. Or who, rather.

Fuck.

“I told you NOT to look. What part of that did you NOT understand?!”

“I was nervous okay?! Who doesn’t look in that situation?!”

“Well, you don’t have time to freak out, Jungkook’s coming this way right now.” Jess let out the words nonchalantly as she grabbed another drink, and as you felt his shadow approaching, you tried your best not to look like the most constipated and fidgety individual in the world.

Was it working? Definitely not.

“I’m gonna be right over there okay,” Jessie whispered gently and gestured toward the doorway right across from you.

“No, no, no, Jess, don’t leave, don’t leave—,”

“Get off me, I have to, he’s coming—,”

“Don’t leave—,”

“Stop I’m going—,”

You felt a gentle tap on your shoulder, as Jess slyly tottered away in her slightly tipsy state and shot you a not so secret wink. Great.

“Hi,” Jungkook’s breath hit your neck, and you felt your throat become tight. When you turned around to glance at him, you realized he looked a little different. His hair looked longer, darker, shinier, the skin along his cheeks and forehead were glossy and tanned, his complexion was slightly flushed, and yet the golden undertones were enough to bring you back to your summer classes, half spent avoiding Jungkook on the subway. The troubled look in his eyes, the eyes that you had been looking away from for months, was enough to make you feel regret. He looked so happy always, and yet the subtle pain you could feel from his expression made you feel like the wicked enchantress in any cliché fairytale. He was pretty enough to be a prince, you thought.

“Why have you been avoiding me?”

His words broke your trance. And yes, it was a trance. Because just like you remembered it, looking at Jungkook was not simply looking at any kindred spirit looking for a purpose in life, looking at Jungkook felt like a purpose. And as ridiculous as it sounded, you thought it was worth it.

“I-I haven’t.” You spoke as firmly as you could, but he didn’t seem convinced, you could tell. And it was now more than ever that you wished you could lie as well as everybody else, or be as bold as half the kids that were at this stupid party, or flirt as eloquently as Jess. But you couldn’t, and he knew. He knew.

“Are you ever going to give this a chance?” He asked, and you could hear how desperate he was. It burned. You felt your throat closing, more. Was that possible?

“Give what a chance?”

“This, [Y/N]. Us. Are you ever going to stop avoiding me, avoiding your feelings for me, avoiding potential? Y-you’re a part of my life. You’ve been a part of my life for months. Why are you running away?” Jungkook’s eyes bore into yours. He was waiting for an answer. You wanted to give him an answer.

This isn’t what you were used to. This was foreign. This warm feeling that crept up your sides and held you sharply like a paralyzing embrace, this sweep of heat that fell over your cheeks and made your jaw slack, this cloud of beautiful iridescence that made your pupils shake, that stole your gaze, that forced your gaze—upon him. You couldn’t think, and the droning of the voices around you only made the burning sensation in your heart worse.

“I-I need to go,” you mumbled rapidly, grabbing your clutch and shuffling out the veranda door across the hall; refusing to look back at the boy that stole your dreams and made your being quake.

You needed to go.

7.

“[Y/N]!”

“I-I wasn’t meant for relationships, Jungkook. Just drop it.”

“How do you know that? You’ve never given yourself the fucking chance!” Jungkook shot back. The intensity in his eyes ran shivers down your spine. This was breaking him, you were breaking him. This is exactly the reason why you wanted to stay away.  

“I’m just not a “love” person, okay?” You pleaded.

“Yeah, I think I’ve picked that up by now.”

“Jungkook don’t make this harder than it already is. Don’t you have something better to be doing right now, something other than harassing me? ”

“Why do you keep pushing me away? Why don’t you trust me?”

“Why can’t you just drop it?!”

Jungkook’s eyes blazed deeply into yours, frustration evident in his face. He must’ve been worn out to the absolute max, and yet there was a still a sense of determination that lingered within him.

He stepped forward and drew a breath.

“Because,” his voice broke. Your heart clenched.

“Because every single time I walk away from you, I get this splitting, fucking avalanche of thoughts, that keep asking over and over and over again: ‘why did you fucking let her go? There’s something here’.”

“I feel this hollowness; because I know you. I’ve seen what life is like with you. And it’s better. It’s so much better than anything I’ve ever had, any relationship I’ve ever made. How am I supposed to just walk away and pretend like you didn't change things? When I know we have something other people wait their whole fucking lives for? When I know there’s something here? Leaving this unresolved like this is eating away at me, [Y/N]. It fucking hurts being around you knowing you don’t want the same thing. But I’m an idiot, alright? Does that make you happy? I stick around, thinking that maybe one day, something will change. That maybe one day, you’ll look at me and admit to yourself that you have feelings. Because I know you do, [Y/N]. Because I don’t think we met for no reason. Because for the time in my fucking life I believe in fate, and it’s not fucking working out and its making me go crazy. So you know what? I am sorry, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I made this mess, but I don’t regret it. And I never fucking will.”

Frozen.

Your body had fallen completely frozen.

The growing discomfort in your stomach had become entirely unbearable, Jungkook let out a staggered breath as your heart beat accelerated; icy chill after icy chill continued to make way down your spine, to the point at which it felt there was a constant outpour of frost at the small of your back. This was sickening. This was torturous. This was gut-wrenching. Though the words felt so soft and easy and comforting in your mouth, the thought of the world they would awaken left you aching to your core. You cared for him. You cared for him so, so much. He was the mirage at the end of a desert of relationships that all seemed to either dry out or suck the life out of you. Though your mind begged for reason and practicality, your heart yearned for the potential of something absolutely breath-taking. Because he, was absolutely breath-taking. And a world without him, well, that wasn’t a life you thought you were prepared for.

Jungkook stood in front of you, running a hand through his hair and catching one last glimpse at the girl he swore was the absolute love of his life. He wasn’t prepared to say goodbye, and yet there he stood, mind flooded with outcomes he couldn’t completely fathom, and most of them, admittedly bad.

He turned around.

If you continued to live your life the way you always had, cautious, safe, you could protect yourself from torment and heartbreak and destruction. If you continued to live your life the way you always had, you’d be able to carry out the rationality of life, the logic, the sensibility.

If you continued to live your life the way you always had, nothing would ever change.

You grabbed his wrist.

“I love you.”

8.

“You—what?” His eyes were almost glossy, and the fleet of stomping elephants in your stomach suddenly felt less overbearing than the pounding in your chest.

You gulped.

“I love you. A-and you, you’re making me go crazy. And I’m not. I’m normal you know! I’m not crazy! It’s you! You’re doing this! You’re making me insane. I-I-you- you-,” your chest heaved. “You’re changing me!”

“Okay.”

“Okay? That’s all you have to fucking say right now? Really? Are you fucking serious I’m gonna—,”

“Okay.”

His mouth twitched. He looked like he was smiling. God, you wanted to punch that smile off his lip. But God, you couldn’t stop staring.

Jungkook bit his lip, the whiplash of emotions almost making him nauseous. He had just gone from complete frustration and dismay, to utter exhilaration; euphoria. All the while, you couldn’t keep your eyes off the soft pink silhouette of his mouth.

Stop looking at his lips.

Stop looking at his lips.

Stop looking at his lips.

God, who fucking cares.

The first thing you did was drop your clutch. Jungkook quipped an eyebrow and his smirk stuck firmly, and you wondered how it would change when you wrapped your arms thickly around his neck and finally attached your chapped and dry lips to his admittedly adorable and absolutely plump lips.

And so you did.

You launched forward and roughly took his lips in yours, and though Jungkook could feel every muscle in his body tensing, the feeling immediately flood away in a single rush of elation that allowed him to smile onto your mouth. Jungkook felt tentative, but the steady pressure of his kiss alongside the gentle caressing of his lips had your fingers shaking. He cupped your cheeks, and squished them endearingly before finally pulling away, lips promiscuously crimson and face flushed. Your noses brushed against each other, and the sheer cliché of the situation made your stomach clench.

Jungkook let out a boisterous laugh as you shut your eyes tightly and then opened them up again.

“So you like me, huh?”

And the smirk sitting on his lips this time filled your heart with the same aggravation that seemed to consume you so naturally, and just as strongly, was the temptation to kiss his annoying lips again just to shut him up.

“Fuck off Jungkook.”

“I’m just asking.”

“I’m just gonna kill you.”

And again he laughed, and you laughed with him. And though the idea of love and relationships and fate and everlasting romance never seemed to rapture your soul the way you often wished it had—though the thought of fate and eternity seemed far away and barely tangible—you ignored your fear of every hurtful past and any spiteful future, and thought now, in this moment, a future with Jungkook was absolute. You hoped.

((if u made it this far, thank u and have a lovely day u beautiful person!!! ily) 

[sweetnestor]

another dumb list of hc’s: a cheesy hospital show

so you know how in you look happier, jack introduces bella to rick and morty, well she decides to introduce him to one of her shows hehehe

“its kind of stupid, like i hate to love it and love to hate it and i need someone to suffer with me but if you dont like it we dont have to watch it heheheheheh U WANNA WATCH GREYS ANATOMY”

to her surprise, jack agrees (maybe he does bc shes Sad but Trying To Be Better so he wants to make her feel better)

basically throughout ylh jack and bella are slowly but surely falling into the greys hole alshdlashgjl

naturally they groan and make fun of the petty relationship drama at the beginning, but they lowkey love it

jack actually gets moved by some of the patient’s stories, so he’ll cry sometimes whereas bella just rolls her eyes at every goddamn thing that happens with the main character

“lmao imagine if i was like ‘pick me mark!!! choose me mark!!!’ when he dumped me haha”

as the show goes on, one of them always points out something a character does like “thats you” “me” “omg thats us”

bella: “oh my fucking god” jack: “what”

“she’s sharing a dog with her ex boyfriend and his fucking wife!!! what the fuck!!!! i hate this episode its too real!!!”

“well you’re a lot like meredith grey”

bella gives jack the silent treatment for the rest of the episode

fastforward, theyre at season 9 by the time bella is Really Dating ethan, so she and jack put it on pause so ethan can catch up bc he Needs to Be Mildly Annoyed and Addicted to this show too

one of the songs on the playlist she made for ethan is in fact ‘chasing cars’ and its bc of the season 2 finale

oh and ethan also cries whenever an animal dies or something (hint)

“hey so um i know its just a tv show and shit but like.... dont die on me anytime soon” “dont cut my fucking wire then”

bella: “which character am i most like” everyone: “meredith” bella: “...i was thinking callie”

jack: “youre telling me that if you were pushed into a lake you would actually try to swim and fight your way out?????” bella: “......shUT UP”

ethan: “if we’re doing this then can i be george i like him” bella: “NOOO you can be lexie shes wonderful :)” ethan: :(

jack: “ok well who should i be then?” bella: “....you have a derek shepherd personality....” jack: “but youre meredith.......” bella: “biiTCH IM CALLIE”

ofc later ethan learns why he cant be george, and bella fucking cries in his arms abt it being the drama queen she is

she also gets really really anxious at the end of season 6, like holy fucking shIT she’s fanning herself and tensing up, but SHES SO INTO IT

jack and ethan are actually worried like “should we watch this on our own time??? D:” and shes like “nO its part of the show i got this!! just HOLD MY HAND”

this fuckin show gets to their (mainly jack and ethan) heads sometimes so when they hear stuff like “i cant live without you!!” and “take me instead im his wife take me!!” they internally side eye bella

bella: “man i know people are dying and shit but like meredith calm the fuck down lmao”

at one point, jack goes back home so he cant really watch the show anymore (he’s fine with it, he didn’t really like it that much, and besides he can only watch it with bella)

ethan doesnt really like it that much either, although he too also gets moved by the patients and he likes making fun of it with bella

“so... are you the meredith to my derek?”

bella, patting ethan’s hand: “you can’t be derek either babe”

EDIT: jack and bella take after cristina and meredith hence they ‘dance it out’ a lot too after watching them do the same lmao

[loveaningenue]

Taylor Swift’s 2005-2006 MySpace Comments

Taylor’s alleged MySpace comments in a chronological order from 2005 to 2006. (Time of posts on 24h). Pictures of the comments were too blurry, so I didn’t add, but if needed, I have them saved in a file if anyone needs proof. 

NB: All the comments are replies to unknown posts by her friends, so the context is unknown. 

Sep 3, 2005 13:08

I am obsessed with you.

If you look out your window and down the street about 200 yards, you may see a big white van parked on the street. I am inside the van with a telescope and computer. Just trying to catch a glimpse of kelsey dammmnnn morris.

haha. end of story.

Sep 5, 2005 1:37

AWWWW brittany I miss you so much. And yes, I can verify that you do know every word to that song. I love you for it. :-) . Prom was incredible and thankyou so much for everything you’re ever done in the past to make me feel welcome into that whole group. You have always been so nice to me. Thankyou for everything. You may not have noticed but it really meant a lot to me. 

Sep 6, 2005 3:26

LACEY LACEY LACEY

I’m in love with you.

There’s no other way around it.

hehe

Sep 10, 2005 2:01

Pretty girl.

I could away twenty and knock on your door and ask you how you’ve been...

But I think I’ll just sit here and type it. Tell me how you’ve been, child. taylor

Sep 11, 2005 21:09

I have the same name as your boyfriend.

Therefore I am better than everyone and you should like me more.

taylor

Sep 14, 2005 20:43

HOMECOMINGQUEENHOMECOMINGQUEENHOMECOMINGQUEENHOMECOMINGQUEEN

{haha i love you and your pretty crown}

taylor

Sep 18, 2005 11:56

Kelsey’s awesome. And got best smile. And should have gotten everything else. Hahah iloveyou

Sep 17, 2005 11:30

uhhh..

“I shot some guy with a flare gun” -sahara

best line ever.

Sep 21, 2005 23:26

WE NEED ONE MORE SCANTRON

Sep 30, 2005 17:06

I have one word for you.

Chorttle.

{bitch}

Oct 11, 2005 23:13

Everybody watch Kelsey’s scrolling pictures of her friends until you get the one of shelby.

Her boobs look AMAZING.

hahahahahahaha

Oct 18, 2006 16:36

RELINQUISH THIS TOME FOOLERY YOU ELFISH KNAVE.

- a prime example of the shit we OUGHT to learn in English class.

Oct 31 2005 8:12

i read your complaining comment about how your not abigails tip 8. well, how could you be? I’M THERE. TAKING YOUR SPOT HAHAhAHAHA. (evil laugh, you know the drill). Well, anyway, listen my queer fellow. I thinketh we shall hangeth out sometime soon, eh? yes, i do believe i am growing fond of this idea. drive over in your sex van and come pick me up. farewell knave. -T-

Nov 6, 2005 0:03

If you were a guy I’d probably date you.

Just a friendly reminder

<3

Nov 26, 2005 17:54

My darling.

18 days till I get my license and  I think we’ll gave to go out in the hummer and shoot people we hate with a paintball gun out the passenger side window.

Abigail and I have been planning this for a while.

You should totally come.

We hear you have good aim.

lovelovelove -T-

Nov 26, 2005 21:50

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

{i like your headline}

and yes, I do.

lovelovelove -T-

Dec 4, 2005 22:07

Here’s a little limerick for you to solve while I waste my life away on the couch with a godforsaken migraine that is threatening my life eating ice cream out of the gallon container watching war of worlds wondering why I was fat as a 10-year-old and not cute like dakota fanning and thinking, “hey, this wouldn’t’t be so bad, everything getting blown to shit and half the world dying.. Life pretty much sucks anyway.”

I don’t want what I can get.

I fuck up what i had so i shouldn’t want it

I want what doesn’t want me Therefore I can’t get it Therefore I can’t be happy Therefore I sit in class writing notes t my equally psychotic redheaded best friend about how to achieve ultimate happiness when honestly we’re just dreamers because no one is ever permanently happy.

I have blonde hair and my name rhymes with sailor.

What am I?

Oh, fuck. It’s me.

Have an equally joyous night fa la la i love christmas

-T-

Dec 16, 2005 2:59

I’m Grant Motherfucking Wood.

I do what I want

and say the word “durr”.

iloveyoubutnotsomuchgrantwood hehehe -T-

Dec 21, 2005 0:17

I’m in England and this whole country is weird.

They’re all weird. Except for me. Who, as you know, is completely normal. 

Hey man we need to hang out when I get back. How about we combine me, my car, grant wood’s house, shelby, ally, some boys, lily and perhaps whitley, some drinks because you might get thirsty, and new year’s eve.

yeeeaahhhhhh

-T-

Dec 28, 2005 14:57

Just a little reminder to you that, even though the semester may be over..

I’m still quite obsessed with you.

haha fuck sewing machines.

lovelovelove -T-

Dec 28, 2005 

WOW I LOVE YOUR PICTURES

( i haven’t been on here in a while and technology alone fascinates me)

Hey I love you and now I know exactly where your house is, and also that Grant Wood plays guitar? Yes, he does. 

Why?

Because he’s Grant Motherfucking Wood, That’s why.

We’re hanging out New Years and I’m driving the Hummer and it will be amazing.

-T-

PS: Hi, Kelsey’s mom!

Dec 29, 2005 2:44

Lil’ Kels.

hahahhaha

I looove love love your new pictures. You are pretty, 

You’re right.. you better watch out.

Because I do what I want.

-T-

Jan 4, 2006 22:37

IM ONE OF KELSEYS BEST FRIENDS HA HA HA HA HA HA.

I’m sorry. Now that I said that I’m probably going to get kicked off the list for disorderly conduct or just simply being a loser in a public place such as the internet. 

But just to let you know. That’s pretty freakin awesome. lovelovelove -T-

Jan 8, 2006 8:53

My name is Taylor. I am not clingy. I do not want a boyfriend.

I do not show signs of wanting a boyfriend.

I do not make hints leading on to the fact that I may want a boyfriend.

So how, tell me, on EARTH is it possible for someone confuse this issue and IGNORE me because they don’t want a girlfriend.

(%(* ..)%([IOJENTI..OWI$...]WO -T-

Jan 10, 2006 0:30

Umm how about DONT listen to addie.

That’s like the most amusing picture I’ve ever seen.

Take it down?

I think not.

Jan 18, 2006 0:14

JORDAN YOU IDIOT.

The term is quite obviously FEM-bots.

Not THEM-bots..

I don’t know what goes in your clouded mind sometimes..

maybe I’m just too sexy and it distracts you. mmm i think i am correct. -T-

Jan 18, 2006 0:16

Oh P.S.

Boys with your name are not exactly as great as you.

I have had much experience with them lately.

hahaha and their girlfriends get mad ;-)

Feb 4, 2006 21:01

THAT PICTURE OF ME UP AT THE TOP IS GROSS.

THAT IS SICK TAKE IT DOWN.

It serves NO purpose other than to make me look FUGLY.

I want it off NOW.

but i loove you

Feb 5, 2006 8:14

Guess who as a thing for you.

The hottest guy in the world.

Whats the mixture of a tiger and a lion?

A WHORE.

think about it.

Feb 28, 2006 5:30

“I definitely just deep-throated the lollipop.”

Hey little girl.. do you want to know a seeker-ett?

hahaha thanks for helping me with my computer troubles. I know you bend many way for me. i like dat.

Mar 21, 2006 7:54

“Kelsey y dont u just LEAVE US ALONE.

WE R TRYIN 2B HAPPY. OMGGGGGG.”

hahahah. See, I had to write the original message with punctuations and vowels-- but I had to translate into the way SHE would write it.

But she’s not immature. She’s just not fond of correct spelling.

i love you -T-

Apr 5, 2006 7:51

LoL i KnOw!!

ExcLamAtiOn PoIntS aRe THIRD GrAdErS !! !! !!

(also notice this super cool signature I’m going to add in to the ending of this comment)

::sWiFt::

hahahah

Apr 22, 2006 18:39

PUT UP PROM PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!

And as soon as I get my laptop back, I’ll be leaving you a certain picture that I think you’ll like.

Because a certain girl might see it. lovelovelove -T-

Apr 23, 2006 14:19

(Picture)

(Picture)

(Picture)

(This is you quite obviously staring at my boobs)

Apr 24, 2006 17:56

Lyrics we live by:

And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time I want what’s your and I want what’s mine

I want YOU, but I’m not giving  giving in this time.

haha i love you you’re really pretty. -T-

Apr 30, 2006 19:33

Kelsey.

I love you and I’m sorry about all the “distance”.

Distance = stupid and unnecessary.

Dude. The truth us, i miss you. Starbucks tomorrow? 

May 2, 2006 22:10

Yeah, I remember I have that photoshoot today and tomorrow. Well, its good to know I was missed. haha. Speaking of missed, I really wish you didn’t work so much because I wanted to hang out today.

lovelovelove -T-

Call me.

May 27, 2006 1:44

Dude.

The scrolling picture of your car is mad cool mannnnnn.

sweeeeet.

I stared at it for like an hour. hahaha

no really. the sad thing is, I did.

Jun 9, 2006 20:30

I CANT FIND MY PHONE.

errrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Kelsey. My lovely best friend. YOU CAME TO MY SHOWWWWWW! I didn’t know if you or ally actually came or not because I didn’t see you, thank you so much for coming. That means the world to me, you know that. I love you.

lovelovelove -T-

Jun 19, 2006 10:52

I MISS YOU AND I WANT TO SEE YOU.

I leave again tonight for north carolina but i wont be gone as long this time, and I want my best friendddd backkkkk.

I love you and ally.

lovelovelove

-T-

Jul 31, 2006 19:24

You know you’ve been away too long when your best friend doesn’t have any trace of you on her myspace anymore. Kelsey. I missss you.

I’m going over to Ally’s house tonight and if you’re not there I’m going to walk over to your house and abduct you. 

lovelovelove -T-

Here’s a LINK to the pictures of the alleged MySpace comments. 

BONUS:

[boyshoujo]

vincent karm

(heavily paraphrased and only 3/4 serious. cw 4 nsfw + kink mentions JSKLDJLDJDL and spoilers)

hot evil man . whats new

creepy kitschy vampire office w/ dead bodies porbably. finds beauty in the ugly and taboo.

(which means hes probably kinky)

tj, pouring his heart out to mc: i used to work for vincent......now he owns me... dont do it mc..... save urself..... MC’s first thoughts: omg do they do some kinky sex dungeon shit :o

mc describes him as having a vampire-like appearance. do u think he actively maintains his vampire/devil brand..... what a nerd...... like his fav play is faust and book is probably the picture of dorian gray ... hes a devil-luvin equivalent of a weeaboo......

hes literally a Nerd with money. a huge nerd with the funds to actually orchestrate his creepy devil roleplaying and power imbalance/eternal indebtedness betrayal fetishes

“we’re alike, you and i”

gets off from roleplaying as the devil

“hey i brought u to this opera hall so i could talk to u about my devil rp”

[talking about faust] “he experienced love.........................and lust....... ;)”

gets bored when u tell him ur not stupid enough to sell ur soul to the devil like GOD have some fun mc :/ live a little. sell ur soul. :/

“tj is sensitive and delicate and good w/ his hands”

hes totally bi BYE 

his idol is oscar wilde, a known (possibly bi) mlm........................heS BI....

likes it when u give him a hard time

“please dont hurt kat, i’ll do whatever u want!!!!” “i love the idea, but we can talk about my fantasies later”

ok no Offense but the way he describes heloise’s love affair as “wild” was....................................................................w i l d

like he jokes about cutting your limbs off and is shown 2 be heartless but depicts heloise’s romance as “passionate and wild”.........would a loveless man describe a romantic relationship w/ such vigor? Who Knows

snarky smile looking down @ u adjusting his tie

“join my side so i can give u the world (and then u can betray me and i can get off frm that)”

“mmm, u smell like orange blossoms and....... betrayal :)”

“seducing me does nothing. only betrayal turns me on”

“ur my fave traitor........ur treachery makes u truly butiful......”

HIS DDEEP, THROATY CACKLE...............

his crreepy old man mmmRMm ;) laugh

Vincent liked that. 

i know this man is probably 328402834% running on capitalism and probably doesnt give a fuck about stuff like romance and morals and human relationships and im projecting a more humanized, idealistic version onto him but maybe ? there’s a tinge of humanity in him ? he plans paris to be a city “with no anger or pain, only bliss” which actually makes me really sad?????? like...... WHO HURT HIM..... what pain is he talking about.......how did he become this power and control hungry dude......

i mean, his IDOL oscar wilde literally went to jail for pursuing a romantic relationship w/ a man, which he deemed to be “The Noblest Form Of Affection”...............would a loveless man really idolize a guy like that...

Local Loveless Man Capitalizes Off Of Love Serum

“i work at tight and tailored” “now that’s a fetish i can entertain ;) ”

is suspicious of u but gets caught up in ur flattery

tbh he probably knows its u/isn’t stupid but gives u hints throughout the game anyways so he actually has a game to play and can keep catching u in the act

getting dragged away by the police, who he practically owns, while ur character watches him triumphantly

“you know, i kinda liked you.” “the feeling is mutual, too bad you had a conscience.” *shines his killer smile and then gets dragged away to jail lmao

hits u up in jail. he could easily call up a rich powerful business partner but no. ur his #1 booty call

whY DOES HE NUT FROM BETRAYAL IM LAUGHING like........... imagine being so rich that normal ass hot people dont get u off. no . u already have everything in the world that cute girls are vanilla and boring and only treason and extremely intricate cat/mouse games get u goin

or maybe hes testing people to find someone who isn’t disillusioned by superficiality/values virtue over temptation (relating to the pic of dorian gray/faust) ?? idk im pulling this outta my ass

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: oi walsh Ali: wanna go to a party where the guestlist is undesirable Ali: not in the cool way Ali: but the drinks will be aplenty Carly: u had me @ party but keep talking Ali: obviously you love when I chat you up Ali: family function but they ain't gonna force smalltalk on you w the booze, like so no fear Carly: love wen ur offering 2 take me away Carly: compliments are a beautiful bonus Carly: ur hot bro gonna b there?? Ali: easy Ali: take you somewhere better than wherever he is after if you play your cards right Ali: and someone isn't too OD'd on beer and BBQ by tonight to organise a decent shindig Carly: yea lads r sooo easy Carly: its boring Carly: showing my cards we should get some 💊 & fly through it Ali: 👌 Ali: sadly my mother refuses to address her issues so no stocked medicine cabinet here to raid Ali: I'll ask about Carly: ha Carly: mine don't Carly: I've got this Carly: show your love later Ali: 🙌 Ali: gimme her number Ali: put in the groundwork now like the overachiever I am Carly: [does give her number out] Carly: k but you love me more Ali: obviously Ali: love of my life Ali: gotta rep my manners with your ma though Carly: said as ur slipping ur 💍 off & giving some other bitch the 👀 Carly: how my da works Ali: hmm Ali: better leave her alone then Ali: don't need to repeat her mistakes Carly: if 1 person did the cabinet wouldn't be full for us Carly: let's keep one 'rent 💔 at a time Ali: smart Ali: that's why you're my bae Carly: its cos I kno how to juggle 💘 Carly: & other body parts ofc Ali: 😂 Ali: and a decent trip, hopefully 🤞 Ali: your mum's got a mixture, yeah or do I need to bring tissues Ali: or 🥊 Ali: what's the #mood Carly: whatever you want it to be baby Carly: shes got docs wrapped around her finger Carly: hers anyway Carly: mine's a woman & she refuses to flirt w her own gender Ali: k am a bit in love with her now Ali: soz Ali: clearly send her in, she'll change her tune and your prescription Carly: other than my da who isnt Carly: taught me everything I kno Carly: leave her a message she'll hit you back if you pretend to be hot lad Ali: 💔 that Carly: same I could have two mas Carly: more clothes & drugs to steal Ali: idk, my missus might reckon your da's a style icon Carly: ha Carly: she coming? Ali: nah Ali: you wanna see actual flirting w a middle-aged woman, like, she's your woman Ali: I can't Carly: on her bday she'll propose a 3way w ur ma Carly: been there Ali: 🤢 Ali: that's vile Ali: her diehard need to be more chivalrous than any man should work in my favour for once, like Carly: k Carly: tell me I'm wrong wen she's 1 year older & you ain't had to nah that Ali: bold of you to assume we won't be happily married by then, babe Ali: it ain't til feb Ali: hint hint buy me something Carly: ur married to me Carly: so you gotta say no Carly: & i kno ur a typical aquarius Carly: but I said hers you weren't listening such a hubby mood Ali: wish I could be the man you want and say I don't remember when it is Ali: but I think I do so Ali: 💔 fucking estrogen and empathy strikes again Ali: ultimate cockblock Carly: im not wrapping myself in a ribbon for her so idc when it is Ali: gutted for her Ali: when's yours then Carly: I'm a gemini girl Carly: guess Ali: ah fuck Ali: gonna have to kick it belated Ali: just means I have to go harder so enjoy Ali: hmm Ali: gonna go for 21st Carly: 😢 Carly: nope Ali: damn Ali: just wishful thinking I'd only just missed it, tbh Ali: it's June though, not May Ali: I'm positive Carly: yea Ali: I'll ask our mans Ali: shake him down for all that knowledge I'm sure he's hiding Carly: try it Carly: be funny Carly: how wrong he is Ali: counting on it Ali: how else am I stealing his girl Carly: im not his Carly: already yours Ali: 'course Ali: you seen him much since partygate Carly: just waved him out before you hit me w your invite Carly: y i said yea so fast Ali: I get it Ali: making him leave was always harder than it had any right being Ali: least he didn't invite himself Carly: he makes himself comfortable if I am or not Carly: revolving door on this caravan too so Ali: having 'nam flashbacks Ali: yikes Ali: let's not waste any more time talking 'bout exes tonight Ali: or currents Carly: did your ma let him in on her way out too or does she only like the girls ur w? Carly: aw you don't wanna talk Carly: let me apply gloss hold on Ali: safe to assume he's not coming 'cos of multiple people Ali: not just Lene Ali: 🍓 if you got it, babe Carly: & she's not coming cos of multiple ppl not just ur ma Carly: you not a 🍒 girl hm Carly: interesting Ali: she's not coming 'cos I ain't asked her Ali: awkward if my mother has taken the initiative but help the party go with a swing, I guess Ali: nah, you're a 🍓 girl Ali: too sweet for 🍒 Carly: cos you asked me i kno 😍 so cute Carly: aw you want me to taste how i naturally do Carly: even cuter Ali: be more fun Ali: invite her to my next protest or something more fitting Ali: nothing personal Carly: hey i can be loud Carly: do it all the time Ali: aw you want all her invites now? 😏 Carly: yea Carly: you want me you got me 💍 Ali: alright Ali: you're on Carly: k Ali: get ready for so many adventures Carly: 😊 Carly: wot am i wearing to this 1? Carly: gotta dress for hot bros & disapproving mas Ali: 🙄 Ali: if that's the mood you wanna go for Ali: though idk why you'd choose that over turning my head but go off, honey Carly: i can do that in what Im wearing rn Carly: gimme a challenge Ali: love the confidence Ali: my ma ain't but you will need it with my brother Carly: they all play hard to get until i get there Carly: being easy keeps it easy for them Carly: not my first bbq Ali: nah babe Ali: remember, we're ditching before it gets to that part of the evening Ali: soz to 💔 but I'll be nicer about it than he would so also welcome Carly: throw the keys in the salad bowl as soon as i get there idc Carly: no foreplay needed Ali: gotta get you outta the caravan park more, babe7 Carly: yea Carly: im walking now before he can follow me Ali: meet you halfway? Ali: will bring a crowbar if he's being that clingy Carly: ha Carly: im in the stash don't be sad Carly: ill leave you lots Ali: 👍 leave me chance to catch up too and no worries Carly: ofc Carly: 💙 Ali: you're a doll Carly: yea thats y everyone wants to fuck me Ali: nah Ali: plenty of other reasons for that though Carly: its k you dont need to list off ur compliments 1 per 💊 Carly: i feel the love Ali: you ain't saving me that many, I know 💚 Carly: aw Carly: ur so sweet Ali: nicer to my wives than my girlfriends, obvs Ali: pecking order Carly: 😊 Carly: she's still lucky to have you cos ur an angel to me Ali: you Ali: trust, no angel Ali: and that ain't some juvenile attempt at a brag there Carly: it's a flirt 😈😉 ha Carly: you wanna misbehave w me in front of your whole fam im there Ali: assuming my brother ain't up for it, obvs Carly: cant i have both Carly: what kind of bi r u Ali: one that don't like her brother's handmedowns Ali: lived that life long enough Ali: he ain't a style icon either Carly: ur first Carly: hes maybe Ali: was hoping if we skipped ronan and lene off the guestlist we could avoid the punch-up, tbh babe Carly: aw you dont wanna fight for me Carly: 💔😢 Ali: I mean my brother's girlfriend will have you Ali: only tryna protect, not kill your vibe Carly: scarier than your gf? Ali: deffo Ali: she wishes, the real threesome request that'll spell the end of it all 🙄 Carly: hes forgotten then Carly: be more fun just me & you Ali: obviously Ali: been tryna tell you but easier to prove it Carly: k Carly: ready when you are Ali: soz, forgot shoes Ali: gimme 5 Carly: ha Carly: im not wearing any & im fine Carly: you just wanna do a last mirror check for me 💙 so cute Ali: 😂 Ali: such a pisstake, you walsh Carly: part time flower child you Carly: but its k i still love you Ali: just defending why I'm being so slow Ali: obvs my 😍 weighing me down but lemme have some pride, woman Carly: ha Carly: you're my cute 🐌 Ali: now you're gonna be adorable, fucking hell Ali: you're dangerous Carly: if you cant handle me now wait til I come up Carly: 💊s are the real danger baby Ali: I'll be caught up by then Ali: might have to double-down but I can handle that, no worries Carly: they r being so slow 😢😢😢 Ali: ride it out, baby Carly: you sounded like him then Carly: except hes never called me baby ever Ali: oh dear Ali: I've gone full dickhead Ali: 😬 Ali: I'll take it down a notch Carly: no youre being sweet Carly: theres just lots of ways to trigger a fuck flashback when youre me Carly: dont change Ali: dunno if I could but glad you still wanna keep me around Carly: ofc Carly: i love you Ali: you're so pure Carly: not for years soz boo Carly: & this stash aint either Carly: such a let down 💔😢 Ali: shh Ali: we can make it work Ali: there's enough here to get crossfaded Carly: just dont hate me k Ali: why and how could I ever Ali: silly wabbit Carly: easily Carly: my phones full of Ali: you gonna fuck my girlfriend? Ali: or me and leg it Ali: neither's likely so we're all good, baby girl Carly: she scares me still even if she would have an amazing collection of giant strap ons Ali: 😂 Ali: well I can neither confirm nor deny Carly: no need its every lesbian of her kind Carly: labelled herself Ali: just don't bring up penis envy Ali: she'll lose it Ali: #freudstarteditbabe Carly: can i ask her what she'd do first if she woke up w one? Carly: fave ice breaker Ali: it is gold Ali: but save it 'cos it's just me and you remember Carly: do you wanna know my answer Ali: of course Carly: guess Carly: you owe me a right answer for my wrong bday Ali: Hmm okay Ali: would you Ali: bang as many people as humanly possible Carly: i do that anyway Ali: well you get banged, if we wanna be misogynistic about it Ali: I know what I'd do Carly: more fun with more holes tho so I'm not mad Carly: first thing I'd do is measure to see if I need to brag or exaggerate Ali: pragmatic of you Ali: hadn't even considered that Carly: wanna know if mine's bigger than the lads I've been w ofc Carly: size matters idc what small dicked lads are trying to say Ali: yeah but they're always thinking length when really Ali: girth is where it's at Carly: yea Carly: shouldve taught that in school Ali: how to measure circumference Ali: they defs did Carly: yea?? Carly: idk Ali: I'll show you Ali: on a beer can Ali: unrealistic expectation but you get the idea Carly: all my expectations r unrealistic Carly: make me cum is a stretch for most lads on site Ali: babe Ali: gonna make me 😥 Carly: youre the pure 1 aint you Carly: aw Ali: hardly Ali: saying at least I get that, like Ali: minimum Carly: your gf has some uses that arent being your ma's BFF Ali: precisely Ali: I would've been a bit kinder with it but in a nutshell Ali: what about ronan at least Carly: have you forgotten him now youve upgraded Carly: shouldnt need my review Ali: shh, he'll cry Carly: he was when i wouldnt let him stay for dinner idc Ali: poor boy 😏 Carly: one of his other girls can cook for him Carly: my ma aint there & i aint doing it Ali: he needs to just give in and marry one of his own Ali: it's what he wants, no matter what he reckons Carly: he told me he is Carly: but hes said worse for a fuck so idk Ali: rude Ali: where's my invite to mourn my loss, boy Carly: ill tell him to text you Carly: wont have lost your number Ali: got the drunk texts to prove it Ali: bless Carly: ha Carly: only answer mine tho Carly: 💍 perks Ali: only if I ain't also there with ya Carly: yea Carly: youre gonna b w me forever so Ali: I'll just tell you in person then Ali: if you tell me Ali: deal? Carly: k Carly: i feel happy Carly: 😊😊😊😊😊 Ali: you're on your way Ali: where are you, btw Carly: the longest road ever Ali: hm, tell me about it Ali: I'll run Ali: in dramatic, sexy slo-mo Carly: me too Carly: only way i run Carly: see you when we collide Ali: wifey goals Ali: won't even try and make it our lips that collide Ali: scout's honour Carly: anticipations more fun Carly: plenty of other places I can touch you first Ali: we'll pretend you meant my 💘 Carly: i did that first night @ first 👀 Ali: no lie, we'll have to think of somewhere else innocent-sounding then Ali: do some experimenting, straight girl Carly: i have Carly: i told you ready when you are Ali: I told you, dangerous Carly: only if you get caught Carly: i won't tell if you don't Carly: so good at keeping secrets Ali: I'll sort it Ali: I made vows Ali: she'll understand Carly: were just taking them seriously Carly: nobody can be mad about that Ali: deadly, like Ali: also forgot a bra, naturally and this run is killing me Carly: somewhere innocent I can touch you then Carly: god works in obvious ways Carly: like you Ali: please Ali: if I was doing it for your benefit sure I'd put one on Ali: show 'em off Carly: you kno you dont need to Carly: not your first bbq either Ali: 😏 Ali: maybe Carly: no maybe u kno Carly: & you can feel my 😍 Carly: travelling faster than my slo mo run Ali: love being your wcw, babe 😉 Carly: idk what that is Carly: but if the first letters arent wild child I'm sad Ali: that's far less straight girl so we'll go with it Ali: hope for you yet, like Carly: youre not gonna tell me what it means Ali: woman crush wednesday Ali: used exclusively by girls like Leesha and that Carly: omg i think my ma said that @ the telly the other night Carly: it wasnt wednesday Ali: feeling like hyping up Chezza whatever the night Ali: I 👀 you Carly: but youre wrong Carly: i dont have a crush on you i love you Ali: so if I need a kidney you're down Ali: but no gay shit Ali: 👌 Carly: yea cos whats mine is yours Carly: all of me Carly: so you can have anything you want Ali: good to know Ali: make a killing on the black market Carly: just tell me if youre draining me in the tub so i can have a good last nite before Carly: & stop making me beg for gay shit that's not a mood Carly: i dont do the begging its the other way round Carly: ask anyone Ali: of course Ali: I ain't an animal Ali: you don't have to beg Carly: what do you want me to say then Ali: what you want Ali: obviously Carly: find me Carly: you can do that yea Ali: easy Ali: [does 'cos how long can one road be] Carly: [most excited hug that turns into the longest hug & moment because well we know] Ali: [turns it into linking arms and walking 'fore shit gets too real here] Carly: [is just happy & loling & chatting shit which is endless compliments basically like her eyes being tiny skies & sunshine hair etc you get the idea because high af] Ali: [is listening and not dismissing it 'cos not that bitch but also knows she's high so not being like ooh lol, 'you're so pure'] Carly: [dramatically stops cos remembers suddenly that she needs to give Ali her share so does, sad & mad at herself like she's so upset she nearly forgot bless] Ali: [cups her chin like hey and tells her it's okay whilst looking in her eyes as she takes her share] Carly: [back to being smiley just like that because reassurance bitch & takes her hand & leads her along cos handholding ftw] Ali: [is happy she's happy again] Carly: [her phone is going off cos Ronan but she's ignoring cos only got eyes for Alison rn] Ali: ['you put love eggs in or?'] Carly: [talks in depth about how she's drawing the line at borrowing that kinda shit from her ma cos oversharer even when she ain't high & also throws her phone to Ali playfully like no look so we can imagine how lovely those messages are even just from the first line preview thing] Ali: [takes Carly's thumb so she can open it and reply 'cos that bitch] Carly: [is just loling even though this is such a bad idea] Ali: [schools him in a way that probably sounds familiar lbr] Carly: [then a selfie sesh cos those bitches they love themselves] Ali: [takes her sunnies off her head and puts 'em on Carly 'cos her eyes are massive/pinholed depending which way we're rocking this lol] Ali: [does a 'shh' like no one's gonna know] Carly: [you know she's keeping them sunnies forever now soz] Ali: [just swinging their arms having a gay old time] Carly: [just singing something as they going cos no stage fright when high af & her voice is nice so its a moment] Ali: [😍] Carly: [more compliments when she notices Ali is looking at her cos she's pretty af lbr] Ali: ['how many other hidden talents you got, like?'] Carly: [thinks about it way harder than the question warrants like its a hard question cos lowkey is when you don't reckon you got any skills. Says 11 cos bday clue & lucky number with a mysterious expression like but then laughs cos if she has to ever back that up awks] Ali: [lols back but squeezes her hand like don't doubt it] Carly: [looks down at her feet because actually is shoeless here 'how far?'] Ali: [gestures like 'piggyback?' but ain't that far in my mind] Carly: [accepts because always, good thing Ali is strong & Carly is skinny cos they literally the same height] Ali: [galloping about and into your function like idiots 'cos she's coming up now too] Carly: [miracle that Carly don't fall cos not holding on properly cos wants to stretch her arms out so its like a bike with no handlebars situation lol] Ali: [imagine everyone's faces lmao] Carly: [Tess scowl be like seen from space] Ali: [gets situated on the grass and is just helping herself to drinks Carly: [is just having a little dance by herself cos feeling great not soz everyone especially not soz Ro cos you wish you could babe] Ali: [at least little rock can join in] Carly: [aw the two of them dancing together like cute nerds & she's spinning him round & everything] Ali: [just ignoring all her fam's questions and being chatty af like nothing's weird 'cos high, then joining in 'cos duh more fun[ Carly: [all you can hear is Carly's laugh which is the best so deal with it fam thank you, let my sweet baby angel be happy] Ali: [when you being blatant af] Carly: [when you don't need to be touching a girl who has a girlfriend this much when you dancing in a non sexy way but you is] Ali: [defs need a sprinkler they can all be running through] Carly: [wet t-shirts ftw I see you] Ali: [is motioning like come to my room but not like that lads, just get some weed like you need it] Carly: [takes some drinks with her but the only mental image I have is when Lily in Skins with armfuls when she says keep your vagina on & I'm loling] Ali: [hey ro hey] Carly: [okay but Carly trying to talk to her & being so nice cos she's so pure & Ro being so rude] Ali: [even in her state given her all the disappointed looks like ??] Carly: [this sweet child laughing it off cos how she do but how dare you Ro, I'm mad] Ali: [going to the kitchen for food, accidental ultimate ro shade] Carly: [just following Ali cos she's never been here & don't know where she's going but quieter cos you can tell she's thinking what did I do wrong cos how her brain works] Ali: [being reassuring af] Carly: [sitting on the kitchen counter swinging her legs looking so cute with her dirty feet & drinks from the tap cos she do what she want] Ali: ['you look beautiful'] Carly: [smiles & laughs like its chill but is seriously 😳 cos who says nice things to her like this ever] Ali: [gets them and rocky ice lollies bye everyone else] Carly: [when you eating it seductively without being aware or trying to be that cos its your life] Ali: [is giggling 'cos high] Carly: [more compliments because how cute] Ali: [lays her head in her lap to 'cloudgaze' aka sneak peeks] Carly: [playing with her hair & freckles sporadically because she's soft & intimate like that, be more blatant girl, love it] Ali: [doing daisychain around her wrist 'cos bringing it back] Carly: [finally remembers there are drinks so is on that but v distracted looking at & touching Ali, oh girl same we all would] Ali: [tryna be chill but obvs into it regardless of how 'straight she is] Carly: [lies in the grass & does snow angel moves like she can flatten the grass & make one, god bless you babe, brings Ali with her so they just snuggling cos we can be this blatant] Ali: [just stroking her hair nbd] Carly: [loves it & is making it known by talking about how good it feels & throwing out compliments like its her job sorry for how gay this is everyone but she thinks Ali is the best so] Ali: [backatcha telling her how pure and sweet she is and they're just blabbing at each other] Carly: [soz k stew but this is cute] Ali: [when you wanna kiss her so bad 'cos you're high and happy and this is a mood] Carly: [I'll either save or condemn us cos she's gonna go take some more pills so they don't wear off so they could be alone if Ali goes with & she'd be dragging her along so v dangerous] Ali: [looking at themselves in the mirror and making funny faces] Carly: [& Carly just peeing cos no shame, same tbh] Ali: [but doing like war/festival style paint on each other's face with like, whatever lipstick has been left in that bathroom] Carly: [but think how close Ali would have to be to her face to do that like how has she not kissed her, applause needed honestly] Ali: [draws a lil heart on Carly's nose] Carly: [can't stop looking at herself cos loves it] Ali: [takes loads of pictures, improtu bathroom photoshoot sesh] Carly: [likewise taking loads of pics of Ali but like weird close ups cos she gaaaaaaaay & focused on the details] Ali: [posing 'cos we know she's about it lmao] Carly: [more touching of freckles like she's gonna draw something connect the dots style but just using her fingers cos they are perfect as they are & she'd say so] Ali: [not much would phase her but she would be blushing rn] Carly: [just gushing about how adorable she is endlessly like it'd be too much from anyone else] Ali: [keeps saying ILY 'cos being off your face ftw] Carly: [saying it back of course & all the terms of endearment like baby, angel etc cos that's just how she is anyway] Ali: [someone, probably Tess, banging on the door like they're desperate, we see you ma] Carly: [jumps out of her skin, again same] Ali: [hugs her protectively] Carly: [smelling her hair like a peak gay during the hug because lbr it'd smell nice, no shade or shame here, more compliments for that obvs] Ali: [going back downstairs before there's a brawl but when you ain't even phased 'cos something happening here deal fam Carly: [when you lowkey dancing your way back out cos you happy af & you find the dog on the way so you're carrying him with you & kissing & loving him & its adorable sorry bye] Ali: [and spuds such a funny looking boy lmao] Carly: [lying on the grass again spooning the dog & singing to him probably a song from when she was little & her mum cared like he a baby] Ali: [just watching and melting 'cos actually so cute, don't cry bitch lmao] Carly: [sees her & crawls over like hey, curling up with her again because the lap is a mood forever & we need to claim it from your future child for the gays] Ali: [doing teeny tiny plaits in her hair and humming the song she was just singing to the dog] Carly: [just chatting shit the whole time soz everyone else but they loving life let them be] Ali: [just getting to know each other hardcore 'cos neither of them has much time for small talk or bullshit anyway so on drugs it'd be like 1000 percent more intense, also shamelessly ignore a call and multiple texts from your actual girlfriend] Carly: [but then after all that because I'm evil & she's 'straight' let's say she makes eye contact with Fraze somehow so off she goes to flirt with him as if that's even a possibility when you know it'd just be annoying like her taking his 🚬 to try & be so cool & seductive, babe no. He's just like Ali control your girls] Ali: [is annoyed but not gonna do anything unless it got more dramatic like you deal, casually going through her phone to find a party or something] Carly: [Fraze just being such a dickhead soz Carly also knowing that's Bea's lipstick because of course he does so loling about her & Ali's impending doom] Carly: [also Ro coming out cos someone made her to 'eat' so just being super judgey such joy] Ali: [fully like fuck this like don't kill my vibe fam so walking like she just gonna go in the house but really she peacing] Ali: if ur done come back out Carly: where d u go? Ali: found us a party Carly: k Carly: [catches up to her like oh hey] Ali: [tells her it ain't far to go and starts walking] Carly: [looks down at her feet like she only just remembered she's not wearing shoes but doesn't miss a beat in keeping in step with her because being gay is more important] Carly: dont b mad @ me Ali: [looks down too and is like, we can go get shoes first if you want lol] Ali: I ain't Carly: the colours around you have changed Carly: i kno u r Ali: nah it's like Ali: hmm Ali: I'm not sure what it's like Carly: like me again Carly: [is saying sorry because always quick to that one] Ali: ['I do, you don't need to say that'] Carly: [trying to give Ali her drink as a peace offering like hmm I've done something wrong must make amends somehow] Carly: [& then more pills when she remembers she has them still] Ali: [shrugs like why not and accepts, cue Leesha and probably her 'best' friend tottering out of her house looking the most overdressed] Carly: [Carly loling because she has the whole day but these bitches taking it as a slight against their everything] Ali: [Leesha started shouting the odds 'cos mother's daughter and obvs already white girl wasted, Ali like let's just go 'cos over it] Carly: [Carly offering her pills cos change your mood babe & being looked at like she's offering poison, you've been there before Leesha I get it] Ali: [tryna lowkey drag her away before this becomes the Thing tm they want it to be for the #drama] Carly: [Carly just chatting about Ali's heroics & how sweet she is cos knight in shining armor for her forever lbr just like 😍] Ali: [loling] Carly: [Carly just out the blue like 'you should kiss her, then she'd be happier' like no babe Leesha ain't you but I love the softness of your world view] Ali: ['fully converted, are you?'] Carly: [lols but is also like 'you haven't kissed me yet' with a cute little pouty face as she walks on slightly ahead looking at the sky] Ali: ['Night still young, baby'] Carly: [clearly is buzzing about this & not hiding that 'I love you more than her' how unspecific she could mean Leesha or K stew or both, god bless] Ali: [is all 'I know' but not 'cos she's a cocky bitch lmao 'cos you're pure'] Carly: [puts her arms up like a child who wants to be picked up cos she wants Ali to carry her into the party] Ali: [does 'cos duh even if she's joking about how high maintenance she is] Carly: [snuggling into her the whole time cos she's soft] Ali: [let's hope it's not too far, probably some 20-something hippie waster's chill thing] Carly: [when you humming but using Ali's heartbeat as your basis for a tune cos gaaaaaaaaaaay] Ali: [when you're harmonizing] Carly: [#goals for real] Carly: [but then she gotta stop so she can compliment Ali again cos we know her voice is fire but Carly didn't necessarily know this] Ali: ['we should jam for real some time'] Carly: [cue her rambling stage fright reveal because like we said no time for bullshit so its just being put out there & she's like 'you'll have to sing to me'] Ali: [is like okay but silently thinking of all the ways she could help her confidence 'cos that bitch but not gonna be pushy and patronizing about it 'cos not THAT bitch] Carly: [just staring at her adorably all like 'what are you thinking about?'] Ali: ['you'] Carly: [such a big smile but also blushing 'good things?'] Ali: [just gives her a look that's like what do you think and obviously, yes] Carly: [a big hug moment and kisses her on her forehead cos where the thoughts come from] Ali: [the mess of lipstick their faces are] Carly: [they must look crazy, living for it] Ali: [good thing no one at this party will care, turn up and chatting to people and the usual] Carly: [there should be someone there for Carly to hook up with to hurt Ali's heart & reaffirm the 'straightness'] Ali: [when you can't 'cos you got a gf, gutted] Carly: [who is probably still trying to contact you cos highkey] Ali: [text her back girl, come on] Carly: [do it while your real gf is getting you a drink lol] Ali: [let's text]