#like fucking hell im not a complaint line ok???

[trash-nerd]

i swear to god if one more fucking member screams at me for nothing im fucking quitting

[princessbrunette]

Foaming at the mouth for jealous controlling “Where do you think you’re going dressed like that” Rafe but something about “Wear whatever you want I can fight (and im strapped)” Rafe… 🥵

ok esp for girly reader who lives and breathes mini skirts and tiny tops (def not self serving… not at all…)

because you really expect rafe to be the first type. and to a degree, he is— if you’re going out alone that is. usually, you bow your head to it, because really — you tell yourself — he’s just concerned about your safety. there are some real creeps out there, and going out alone in a mini skirt is a sure recipe for disaster, right?

he’s bringing you to a party on the beach. you didn’t usually go partying with rafe, and he liked it that way — because that’s where he did the most business, cashing out on rich coke heads. you knew he wouldn’t be selling at a beach party, purely because anyone stupid enough to try and snort anything would end up ingesting a fuck-tonne of sand, and it’s just not the kinda complaint he’s in the mood to hear. you actually just get to hang out with him and his friends, and this excites you.

you test the waters, stepping out of your room when he waits in the living room leant against the shelf scrolling on his phone. you know it’s likely he’ll turn you right back around and send you changing due to the little pink co-ord clinging to your every curve. it’s cupping your tits and hugging your waist and leaving all but nothing to the imagination, but it’s been a while since you’ve worn something fun like that — so you try your luck anyway.

“m’ready!” you grin, sticking your arms out by your side all cute. he looks up from his phone, eyes all wide and vacant for a second, lips pouted in thought and briefly drops his eyes up and down your body.

“yeah, looks good kid.” he drawls, flipping his phone deftly between his fingers and stuffing it into his pocket. his eyes linger around your tits again before meeting your eye, walking towards you with a happy and simple smile, one that says ‘can we go now?’

your brows raise and you look down at yourself in surprise. “i’m surprised. you’re letting me wear this out?” you gaze up at him, lips twitching up. you think he’s making an active decision to be less controlling for a moment. he shrugs lazily, eyes flickering around the room as if to say ‘so?’ and with that he lifts the end of his button-up, revealing a glock tucked into his waistband.

oh.

“yeah i don’t think anyone’s gonna have the nerve to step out of line, a’ight? ‘look after my girl.” he steps closer to you, hand coming up to scratch affectionately behind your ears like you’re a dog. you don’t mind.

you stare up at him, all doe eyed and shocked. he thinks it’s adorable honestly, all scared over a little pistol. hell, you’d probably never even seen one in real life before, let alone this close.

“rafe…” you start unsurely, breathily, but he cuts you off, hand caressing your cheek, tilting his head down and raising his eyebrows.

“hey. you wear what you want with me, yeah? m’protected. strapped. it’s okay.” he enunciates, and well— you’re not really in the place to argue. you nod, still wide eyed and he gives your cheek an affectionate tap, squinting his eyes with a satisfied smile.

as imagined, rafes temper rears it’s ugly head one beer down, catching a poor boy a year or two his junior, eyes fixated on the way your ass was moving when you walked along the sand, unbeknownst to wandering eyes. of course, the boy ended up backed up against the pier with the cool end of the gun pressed into his jaw, terrified whimpers ripped from his throat.

“wanna look at my girl, huh? think i’m gonna let that shit run?” rafe is gripping the smaller boy by the collar, teeth grit, animalistic. your breath hitches, you think he may actually shoot this kid.

“rafe…” you call out urgently, not wanting to get too close.

“no! i—” the boy tries to argue, and you really feel for him, because rafe only presses the gun harder against his chin.

“no? better keep your eyes to yourself or i’m gonna be the last thing you fuckin’ see is that understood? is that understood asshole?” he grits out, eyes wet and watery from adrenaline.

“rafe! stop!” you call out, brows furrowed and tears brimming. he sighs, finally hearing you and steps back, not taking his eyes off the mortified boy infront of him. he stares until the kid grows the balls to run off, tripping and kicking up sand as he disappears to the other side of the pier where the rest of the party goers were. it’s only then he looks back at you.

“shit.” he sighs out, shaking his head, shaking himself off completely as he stares out at the moons reflection on the ocean.

you hug yourself, watching him mellow out a little. he tucks the glock back into his waistband, yanking his shirt out again to cover it.

“you’re not bringing that thing out again.” you accuse, pointing to his gun shape tucked into his pants. he blows you off, lifting a hand and walking the other way before turning back suddenly.

“i have to protect you, you understand? if i can’t bring this out with me you— you can’t bring that.” he lifts an arm, gesturing to your lower body. you stare at him in confusion before looking down. your… ass? was he talking about your ass?

“how am i supposed to leave my ass at home, rafe?” you argue, and as soon as the words leave your mouth— you can’t help but let out a giggle. you’re mad at him, yes — but the demand was funny, you couldn’t deny.

you think he’s gonna get mad, maybe wipe the smile off your face, but his sigh turns into a giggle too, looking away from you. the irritation from his face melts into something more boyish and young, his tongue sticking out between his teeth as he lets out a low chuckle. this only makes you chortle more, and he shakes his head, trying to hide his amusement as he waddles toward you on the uneven sand, holding out his arm and reaching you, bringing you beneath it into his side.

“alright, come on trouble.” he smirks, leading you back to the party. “y’still in a partying mood?”

[vajazzly]

AUs: enemies to lovers + courtroom drama

ok i do not have a snippet in me rn HOWEVER. i was thinking abt it and like. there is no way in hell either of these guys make it thru law school!! sirius would be good at it but he would HATE it and quit, remus would suck at it im sorry hes not good at arguing 💀💀 wet napkin man

BUT THEN theres the question of... whats the courtroom drama.... SO

i feel like itd be like. a dispute. like theyre neighbors and sirius wants to build a fence for his dog but they keep arguing about where the plot lines are!! and he builds the fence anyway bc fuck this guy his dog needs yard time and BOOM theyre in court. battling it out. screaming in front of god the judge and the poor jury. they keep ending up in court over petty ass neighbor disputes and the judge legitimately wants them dead!! its the stupidest shit like the fence or noise complaints and eventually theyre just doing shit to spite each other, im thinking like Beef type shit (the show on netflix r yall following me) like defacing each others cars and shit 💀💀 they get SO petty

and then. they get a new neighbor whos just the WORST. like, homophobic or something, leaving jesus pamphlets on everyones doors, calling the cops for the stupidest shit, EVIL. so they gotta team up to take them down >:)

[karmautistic]

I'm bored as fuck drop your salt about v&tsk

Oh jeez... fandomwise or canonwise?

I don't think there's much I can say canonwise that hasn't already been said. All the characters of color are based off of vaguely racist stereotypes (I.E. Yong being the "Jinx Asian character") and stuff like that, all complaints of which I agree with.

But uh, oh man, fandomwise? Jesus where do I begin.

How about varigo interpretations?

I just think, imo, I've seen a lot of people portray them in a way that just... rubs me the wrong way as a gay man. I really hate the stereotype of "smaller guy is big pushover and so easily flustered and uwu shy" and then "bigger/taller guy is flirty and strongk and an asshole but its ok because its hot♡"

I actually don't see this as often as I thought I would, but im assuming that's because I tend to stick to people in my own friend circle for varigo content, but that doesn't mean I haven't ran into it.

Varian's not shy and he's not a pushover, like holy shit I can not emphasize the enough, if Hugo said any of the "uber hot flirty" lines half the people write Varian getting flustered by, he would have bodyslammed Hugo in 10 seconds flat.

There's just something so stupid about the idea of Hugo being an overly flirty guy who pushes boundaries and doesn't respect personal space or romantic advances and thats... thats supposed to be attractive? No.

I mean, I know most of the characters have vague personalities so there's not exact way to write them in-character except Varian. He is literally the most fleshed out from tangled the series and from what we've seen, he's clever, insightful, and oh my god he is stubborn. There is just no way in hell he'd lay down and take flirting from some random dude.

One thing I still don't get about people writing him as a push-over even after season three is... Yeah in season three, he was a damsel in distress a lot, but he... still had a lot of moments of sass... Did you. Guy's not. Watch the show?

Are you willfully ignoring character traits so it can be """sexy"""?

They tend to reduce Varian to a weird push-over which is. The opposite of his character. He's a sassy dude who may have a hard time turning people down do to maybe past situations,, he's still not going to lay down and let Hugo push him around.

People are very much too worried about what is "sexy" in mlm ships than what's healthy.

Also Varian literally spent so much of tts having trusts issues aeound his dad and raps and everyone and then unhealthy relationships of manipulation around the saporians. I just think he should have a healthy relationship with trust and communication and not just. "Mmm haha flirt sexy"

Also I just. CALL ME CRAZY but I think portraying all mlm as "hot flirty guy who pushes boundaries" and "person who finds being pushed around and abused sexy" is... bad. Like. Its just bad. Wtf yall.

Thats about it for varigo but one more thing that bugs me abt the fan base is like. People arguing over 7k being Canon or not.

Like. People get excited and thats fine but then there's people who are like... idk I don't wanna be mad at them bc I know they're trying to help and like. Tell people not to get their hopes up, but I promise saying "its probably not gonna happen" doesn't. Do anything. It just seems kinda mean tbh.

Like yeah idk maybe its not maybe it is happening idc at this point, let people be happy with their own things and if it ends up not being canon they can find out on their own. Like who cares just leave it alone idk lol.

Kind also ties into a lot of tts fans that dislike complaining abt 7k posts showing up in the tts tag... like. Just. Mute 7k or vat7k or whatever???? There is a mute button on tumblr dot com you can use it. I promise you will not die of annoyance because tumblr use Hugospubichair69420 posted another varigo drawing in the tts tag. If its not depicting abusive or legitimately harmful content then like. Keep scrolling.

Idk sorry my brain scrampled egg and I could word this more eloquently if I tried but I wont.♡

[enbyblades]

ok so my roommate and i were talking about starop bc i love dragging her into my bullshit...but also its her own fault for asking why i ship them jsdlafsf but anyway we came up with some good angsty content 

so anyway to be honest we were detailing a potential animatic jashdlasfjsf but it kinda led to us talking about the story potential of having this cross faction romance and all that like parallels between characters; theyre in a fight and somehow starscream winds up fighting against optimus and he fires a missile at him but misses a little too intentionally and megatron notices and like squints his eyes and gives starscream shit about it later of course bc hes suspicious and tells soundwave to keep a closer eye on him,,,, 

whereas ratchet, in a separate battle, starscream gets shot down by one of the other autobots and optimus just freezes and he wants to run to star and make sure hes ok and it shows on his face and his body language and ratchets pieced things together at this point, he knows Smthn is going on between those two, cuz hes perceptive and he just,, nods at optimus and turns the other way, off to help the others...he pretends he does not see it. 

and knockout knows, hes still a bitch but he and starscream have smthn of a mutual respect for one another, mostly bc breakdown acts as knockouts conscience ajsdhlsff, so while he teases star like “have fun with your boy toy, screamer? ‘,:)” he still like covers for him when megatron is wondering where he is and hes off with optimus. 

but the SPICY parts, so starscream kidnaps bumblebee and fucks him up a good deal, probably as a desperate attempt to get megatron off his back a little, and when optimus and maybe someone else arrives to save him, star grabs bee in a chokehold with his gun pointed at his head and optimus of course is horrified and trying to talk him down telling him he doesnt have to do this and wondering whY hes doing this, and starscream shoots bumblebee in the torso, not killing him but yknow, hes gonna be out for the count for a hot minute, and flees the scene 

so they dont see eachother for a while, they stop having their secret meetings bc optimus is hurt and starscream is in his own emotional turmoil over the situation. before optimus can figure out how he wants to handle the situation, he gets a complaint from fowler whos like “WHY is this goddamn jet ATTACKING random truckers???” bc starscream, ever so smooth, decided the best way to get ops attention was to. tackle him in alt mode apparently. ratchet gives him a look and says “looks like someones trying to get ur attention...” and optimus decides hell try to find star in their usual meeting place. ratchet of course is like, long suffering sigh “i cant stop you optimus...i just hope you know what youre doing. be careful.”

so they meet and starscream tries to act like everything is normal but of course optimus has to address the elephant in the room, and starscream is like “i thought we agreed to not talk about war and factions when we meet..” and optimus is like “starscream, you grievously injured bumblebee. you know why we have to talk about this” it becomes pretty heated, mostly bc starscream is explaining himself and is frustrated at the world and their situation and is ranting. he apologizes and clearly regrets what he did, and optimus, having the spark of a saint, forgives him tho hes still hurt. starscreams still VERY distressed though. they have This exchange:

“starscream...please. come back with me... you wont feel like you have to hurt my friends anymore. we wont have to sneak out in secret...”

“how many times do i have to tell you i CANT optimus! megatron would KILL me!” (he used to claim that he cant abandon this cause hes worked so hard for, but hes since come to realize the original ideas the decepticons were fighting for have been lost to megatrons batshittery.)

“we would protect you-”

“oh, like you protected CLIFFJUMPER?”

his eyes widen as he immediately realizes how royally hes just fucked up, and he can see it in optimus face that hes barely holding back a whole slew of hurt, disappointment, anger. it hurts twice as bad bc we all know WHO killed cliff, but also bc optimus no doubt has that leader complex that causes him to feel like cliffs death was his fault bc he couldnt lead them well enough to prevent it, and STAR knows this, and optimus Knows that star knows this, and its just..OOF. so optimus holds it in.

“o-optimus, i- im sorry, i didnt-”

“starscream....i cannot abandon my family. so you need to pick a side....and if it is not removed from the decepticons...i dont think it is healthy for us to keep this up.”

“optimus wAIT-”

but hes already transformed and is driving away. 

again time passes, i havent thought this part all the way thru yet, but eventually they meet again somehow and starscream apologizes (again) PROFUSELY, and optimus, in his infinite patience, forgives him again. they meet in their secret place, and its a pleasant normal meeting, but what optimus said is still very much an issue that needs to be addressed, and its lingering. starscream apologizes again for what he said about cliffjumper, and says smthn along the lines of “if anyone could protect me, not that i NEED protection, mind you......id trust you to be able to.”

“then come back with me...”

he looks conflicted. he wants to go so bad, but....

“we’ll see.” 

they kiss and part ways. optimus drives off, but when starscream turns around hes face to face with lazerbeak. soundwave comes out of his hiding place.

“scrap...”

he doesnt bother trying to come up with a lie. he knows it wont get him anywhere. soundwave heard enough, and no doubt recorded it. so instead he pleads with soundwave not to say anything. he promises he wont betray the decepticon cause, he hasnt given the autobots any information and he doesnt plan to, just PLEASE dont say anything. 

soundwave doesnt say a word. he opens a groundbridge and gestures for starscream to walk through first. 

and the next part also isnt totally fleshed out but i imagine he doesnt feel like he has much of a choice, so he walks through and has to face whatever megatron has in store for him unless he manages to escape somehow. whether he gets out on his own volition or is thrown off the ship by megatron is still up in the air, but the ensuing fallout of soundwave finding out and telling megs is what finally pushes starscream to abandon the decepticons for good. 

ANYWAY. YEA. ANGST.

[rebellioussinner09]

Who’s in Control?

Sub Kuroo x dom Fem Reader ❤️

Warning: VERY INTENSE AND LOTS OF CURSE WORDS AND KAMANYAKAN HAHAHAH (CHARACTER IS ABOVE 18 here)

If there’s one thing Kuroo prides himself for is that he knows he has good stamina.

Actually good was an understatement, he knows he has *excellent stamina* not only for playing volleyball but also for bedroom activities.

And Not to mention he was rough and unforgiving when it comes to sex(at least thats what he tells himself)

And he definitely uses that gift for his own advantages,

I mean he himself witnessed on how Y/N would just loose her mind from his Overstimulation or just his thrusting in general.

And a lot of their friends and peers often jokes about on how Y/N handles Kuroo’s attitude. Because as they quote “kuroo seems to be the type of guy who’s into bdsm”

*because lets be real He wasn’t called scheming captain by his team for nothing*

And Even Kenma and Bokuto would join in on that playful banter that Kuroo needs to tone it down sometimes so that Y/N can at least breath and have a chance to keep up with him.

Kuroo would only nod and smile to those comments because oh how wrong their assumptions were.

Because if the roles had been reversed, Y/N was literally 100x worse when it comes to teasing and sadism.

His teammates cleary hasn’t seen Y/N’s all dominant glory when she’s the one taking the reigns on their relationship.

And Kuroo totally had his first hand experience on this;

There was a time where they made a bet on who could last a week on teasing before the other one break, and Y/N won that bet fair and square cause not once did he saw her Crumble, she just shrugged off Kuroo’s efforts in teasing like it was just nothing.

And the dirty talk

*oh god the dirty talk*

If kuroo had a filthy mouth that calls out degrading terms when doing the deed, Y/N was more of a sweet smoth talker that would coo and whisper sweet nothings on your ear and somehow that was 10x worse cause man that girl knows her way with her words.

She would babble out on “how much of a good boy” Tetsuro has been and on how proud she is of him while she bounces herself up and down on his cock.

At that; Kuroo can practically pinpoint the moment he realizes and accepts he is no match for a dom Y/N

So he only whimpers in response as she digs her claws at the back of his shoulders as she continue the activity on riding him.

“Who’s my sweet boy now?” Y/N asks, her fingers slowly tracing the veins on Kuroo’s biceps.

“I am” Kuroo pants desperately “I am baby please- you’re killing me”

But the girl in front of her only raises a brow back at him, she growls loudly as her hand went up to grip Kuroo’s neck

“Now that’s not one way to adress me” she demands as she squeezed the lining of Kuroo’s adam’s apple

“Mommy” Kuroo moaned below her “Im sorry Mommy please”

With a satisfied smirk, Y/N realeses her hold, she leans down to her partners eye level to give him a passionate kiss on the lips

“Ok baby. You can cum now”

As if on command, Kuroo bucks his hips against her core as he splurted his load deep inside her

“Fuck” he hisses between his teeth.

By the time he was finished, he gives Y/N a sturdy glare “You’re killing me” he groans

But his girl only giggles in response “That’s what you get for picking a fight with Bokuto today”

And that was only Level 01 of Y/N being a dom.

Level 2 was way more intense and extreme because it involves a certain strap on toy that Y/N bought online

And to be honest Kuroo was a bit hesistant at getting pegged at first, because no way in hell was he agreeing on shoving up a dildo up to his prostate,

but the protest died on his mouth the moment Y/N pushed him in all fours over towards the bed.

“Awww but baby you take me so good” she purrs as she gently tugs of Kuroo’s boxers from his waist.

“Surely a big boy like you can handle a little strap on now would you?”

Kuroo lets out a deep growl as Y/N prods a finger into his hole to at least stretch it out before she pushes the toy in

“Y/N-“ he warnes

“Yes baby?”

He was about to retort a complaint when he feels the silicon material pushed up against his p-spot

“Fuck” he curses as he grabs a fistful the sheets below him

“You okay?” Y/N asks once she was fully in.

“M’good” Kuroo breathes “Just take it slow on me baby please”

But Y/N’s definition of slow was quite the opposite cause she rutted in him almost quickly as he lets the 7 inch toy slide in and out of him.

The overwhelming sensation of being full and the constant hitting of his prostate was too much for Kuroo’s liking.

He was too absorbed in processing the foreign object against his hole he was surprised Y/N’s hand made its way into his neglected cock.

She gives it a few gentle strokes before she pulls away to trap her arms into Kuroo’s neck.

“Straighten up” she orders lowly “Look at yourself in the mirror”

And Kuroo was quick to obey as he takes his full form on the reflection in front of him.

He was on his knees on the bed while Y/N relentlessly pounds him from behind.

“That’s it baby look at how much of a slut you are” Y/N snarls as she tugs him upward again so he can get a full view of his lower abdominal muscles and his cock that is leaking out pre-cum

The pleasureable feeling of him getting fucked and the degrading words from Y/N was just enough to send him into the edge that he even almost pulled out an aheago face right then and there.

And of course Y/N’s quick eyes didn’t miss that;

“Look at the mirror when you cum” she tells him roughly “Let me see that face you make”

So he does, one quick glance into his messy reflection he’s already cumming hard. He takes and jerks his cock out of sudden reflex all in as he maintained eye contact with himself through the mirror.

And fuck does the sight before him will live rent free on his mind from now on. 😂😂

3rd and Final Level was Y/N’s style of Exhibitionism and Public Sex.

Now in their relationship its no secret that kink is somehow Kuroo’s teritory.

Once his horny in public, Him and Y/N are known to be possibly hooking up in a nearby stall or bathroom or even the storage room if they’re inside the gymnasium.

That’s what all the team knew, It was always Kuroo who initiates the first move, But what they didn’t knew is half of those sexual activity was Y/N s idea.

(At least Kuroo has the decency to at least let them do it in a secluded place where he knows is private but at the same time the possibility of anyone walking in on them excited them both so honestly that was the whole point of it so it was definitely a win win situation)

But what Kuroo doesn’t know is how his girlfriend managed to get turned on in broad daylight and in the middle of the library during a study session

(And one thing about Y/N ; if she’s the first one to get turned on; Don’t even try to think of domming, Kuroo learned that the hard way)

So here she was eyeing him up and down with lusty eyes as she drew little circles around Kuroo’s thigh

“Y/N stop it” Kuroo snaps as he gently slaps the hand away.

“Want you” Y/N breathes unto the shell of his earlobe “You’re so sexy today”

Kuroo sighs in annoyance, he then dips his head down so he could give her a small kiss on the forehead

“Hold on a little longer baby” he reasures “When we’re done with the homework we can have a little detour inside one of the classrooms”

Y/N pouts at the idea of having to wait a little longer “But I want you now”

Kuroo gives her another kiss “I know. But they’re like 50 other people here with us”

At his statement Y/N gives a sly smirk.

And Kuroo was quick enough to piece the puzzles together “Baby dont you dare-“

But it was too late, Y/N reacted quickly on knocking few of her books down to the floor catching the attention of few other students from across their table.

She mumbles a quick apology before she kneels down to retrive them.

And by retrieve it was her kneeling infront of Kuroo’s legs to palm his bulge against the fabric of his pants.

“What are you doing?” Kuroo growls “Get up”

But Y/N wasn’t taking any hints and continued to fundle with his balls “You’re already hard babe” she comments “I know you like this. You like me blowing you out inside the library while they are peolple around us”

At the suggestion of blowing him, Kuroo’s breath hitched; “Y/N Im serious” he says “Not here”

Y/N lets out a sarcastic scoff “It will be fine” she assures as she zips Kuroo’s fly down to free his aching cock “Just dont make a sound”

Without another word, she envelops Kuroo’s long shaft into the depths of her mouth.

Kuroo lets out a soft whine as he takes a quick look at the surrounding around him, luckily no one has took noticed of them yet and he thanked the Nekoma high school library for having closed tables that covered their lower halves.

He then turns his gaze back to Y/N who was busy bobbing her head up and down on his cock.

He groans again as he feels her tongue move up to the base then around to his frenulum.

“Fuxk” he curses under his breath as he feels the building organsm ripping away through his stomach down to his shaft.

“baby I’m gonna cum” he whispers as he wraps a hand on her hair to guide her head up and down.

With another quick swish of Y/N’s tongue, Kuroo lets a harsh yelp as he involunarily thrust his hips into her mouth to ride out his orgasm.

Y/N pulls away with a loud pop as she gracefully wiped away the cum stains around her lips

“See?” She mused “that wasn’t so hard now was it?”

He fixes her a stern glare “oh fuxk you” he says as he took in the mess they made.

If they keep doing random stuffs like this; Kuroo’s gonna need a change of pants and possibly change schools. (His reputation as a volleyball captain would clearly be damaged) but when he tooks in the sighs of his girlfriend’s smirk and lewd face in front of him, Kuroo wouldn’t trade it for the whole world.

[unironicduncanstan]

Total Drama Music Camp AU - playlist / performance ideas

here she is,,,, the cursed secret texts,,,,, the total drama music camp playlist , along with some short explanations below, cringe city bitch (most of these are just covers that i feel are the closest to the performance Style id imagine for these characters and not necessarily the exact sound but u feel me) also i went back and tagged my previous posts abt this concept with “td music camp au” so if you dont know what the helling fuck im talking abt plz have a gander xoxo

link: youtube .com/playlist?list=PL-bPcaq3ZK2L682RHPauxrsFIPvGJdsiM (space is there so tumblr hopefully doesnt nerf me from the tag 🥺 )

Some Nights - ok so first weeks challenge. i feel like chris would just want them to all collab together on one huge group performance. kinda like on the first day of school when they make you do the ‘get to know you’ tests. idk exactly who would sing what parts tho bc there are so many so let your imagination run wild !!

Hand crushed by a mallet - ok. OKYAY. im a home of sexual. but this is a Cody, Trent, Tyler, Harold and Izzy song. Cody is on vocals (especially the rap in this version shdofsgjsk), Trent is on guitar and some vocals (does some back and forth with him during the rap), Tyler is on drums (and does that one tiny background screamy bit towards the end), Izzy and Harold are joined up on creating the background track and DJing the whole thing. the distortion/choppy part at the end is izzy LIVE going ape on the audio level sliders. its one of the most energetic performances of the whole series and surprises everyone including the group themselves

Misery Business - Duncan on vocals and guitar, Geoff on drums, Trent also on guitar and maybe some backup vocals. you all know i chose that bc i love associating mgk with duncan but. i rly like this idea actually ;;

Paparazzi - ezekiel. idk who the fuck else except maybe justin bc he’d dance that shit to death. i will not apologize thats Him and its fire but you may write and send any formal complaints to my po box. ill roll a blunt with them,

Pom Pom - Lindsay, Heather, Sadie+Katie, and Izzy. Lindsay and Heather are on vocals, sharing the chorus and each getting a solo verse, and ofc izzy does the weird rap part towards the end, and most of the background track. they all thought they were stuck with izzy but izzy is stuck with these preps. Sadie and Katie are on backup vocals, but their role in this one is mostly dancing and adding ✨ stage presence. 

Maps - Trent is on the guitar and male vocals while Courtney is on the female vocals (the ~top two performers~ gotta have a song together eventually right), DJ on drums, Bridgette on piano. Heather, Lindsay, Justin, and Leshawna are dancers bc lbr the dance from the video is pretty good for a group number

CREEPER? AW MAN - ok this one. is kind of a joke but wouldnt it be rly hilarious if cody, ezekiel, and harold did this one mostly for fun and the whole second part with the existential breakdown was just. used with on stage satire to make fun of chris for being old or smth. like would they suffer that week, yes, would it be worth it, Y E S, 

Shatter me - Eva, Courtney, Gwen, Beth. QwQ Eva’s on vocals for the first time and rocks it, Courtney is on violin, Gwen on drums, and Beth uses her instruments to make a background track before the performance so she can do stage tech/DJ stuff. oh also justin should be on this one bc i want. those costumes from t he vi deo, 

Chop suey - Lindsay and Courtney on vocals (LMAOSJFkSF listen. we love contrast queens that stun the crowd), Duncan on guitar, Eva on drums (and a lot of background screaming to help the Vibe Tee Em)

Unwritten - Leshawna and Trent? ik its a weird combo but i think they’d kill this

Shake it - GEOFF LMFAOGHJKgjfdG

White Winter Hymnal - Lindsay as Kirstie, Noah probably as Avi even tho we all know he can’t sing that fuckgin low. and idk my other 3 bros as Cody, Tyler and Ezekiel. truly iconique group

Forget me too - QWQ DUNCAN AND COURTNEY ,,,,,,,,,,,, i dont apoloigze for the second mgk = duncan pick, anyways duncans also on guitar, gwen on drums (there is no love triangle in this au btw. the only reason theyre singing this song is bc of the regular ~tension~ that u see in like tdi but its just for the stage mostly. as soon as the songs over they would hug and cheer abt it)

Simple and Clean - Bridgette on singing, Gwen on piano, DJ on drums, Beth on general stage stuff + creates the backtrack with Bridgette's harmonies overlayed

Mr. Brightside - OWEN ON THE BRASS YES BBY ITS HIS TIME 2 FUCKIENG SHINE, Geoff on drums, Gwen begrudgingly on piano, Noah is on vocals and they have to literally bribe him with everything they HAVE to get him to try and sing this way. and he does it and it aint too shabby but he will never do it again

Domino - Leshawna on vocals (again these choices are all, based on general vibe and style and not necessarily voice, this is a tiny white girl singing,), Tyler on drums, Duncan on guitar. energy to the max babey the speakers are gonna blow the fuck out on this one

Starships - KATIE AND SADIE GET TO BE A MAIN DUO !!! they alternate lines , with courtney on violin, izzy on that synthy backtrack, and justin is involved in this one bc id change just a couple of things abt the music video costumes for these characters but like. [grabby hands] gimme

Bulletproof - ezekiel vibes.....? izzy and harold get to team up again for the backtrack. weird kids only karaoke night

The Wolves And The Ravens - 🥺 a geoff and bridgette songk,,,,, 

Never Enough Praying (Mashup) - Courtney on Praying, Heather on Never Enough, Beth and Izzy end up together on the background stuff and make a rly nice track actually

Gasoline - bitch. you know what im gonna say but duncans on vocals, Tyler on guitar, Geoff on drums, Ezekiels on track

Better not wake the baby - Noah gets to sing a song that actually matches his style a tiny bit better lol, DJ on drums, Trent on guitar, and i feel like beth is the only one with any hope of figuring out the accordion keyboard thing thats in the background

This is Gospel - Gwen on piano and Trent on vocals. really the music video is the most important part for me bc i think a challenge where oyu have to sing a really intense emotional song while chris gets to dump shit down on your head from the ceiling of the stage. sounds perfect,

Wildest Dreams - codys on vocals bc god i am Obsessed with this cover being a bisexuality / coming out song . everybody thinks hes just regular simping and being his usual fuccboi self when he chooses this song till he gets to those Very Intentionally Unchanged Pronouns that he sings a little too enthusiastically hhhshHDSHHHSDH , also DJ on drums and Tyler on guitar

Happier - Bridgette solo ! 

Stay - Courtney on guitar and vocals, Dj and Harold are on the hand drum shit. once again i live for the ‘unlikely group actually works together and rocks it’ stuff. courtney as always has talent and enjoys what she does but harold and dj kind of steal the show with how in sync and energetic they are abt it lmfaodghd

[steveharrington]

what do you think are the problems with how the kids are written in s3?

okay to preface this some of these problems arent really Problems they’re like. nitpicks. and a lot of them are just a matter of opinion based on my perception of the kids so im not trying to like trash this season skdfjsdlkfj 

max: i had the most beef with max’s storyline bc i think its the most like. egregious flaw of the season. im Not talking about her being teamed up with el, i thought that was actually great and one of the best parts of the season. im talking specifically about her dynamic with billy. after watching him try to beat up lucas and then actually beat up steve only like 8 months before the season you’d think, realistically, she’d be cautious around billy. in season two she was obviously scared of him, like in the car when he grabbed her arm and she was visibly terrified, so it makes absolutely no sense that in season three she’d be willing to sneak into his room and make all these justifications as to why he’s just a normal teenage boy. ive seen people be like “she was just in denial, she didn’t think he’d really kill anyone!” and like........yeah maybe? but she did watch him almost kill steve. their relationship is just so much more casual and like....friendly? compared to season two which like severely sucks because it sorta just erases any trauma max would have relating to her brother being violent and aggressive and prone to just attacking her friends. it was all part of this weird backpedal the duffers did to convince us that billy actually isnt That Bad and therefore deserves a redemption arc. as someone who really related to max in season two because of that sibling dynamic, it sucks. 

mike: i think they took the whole “mike is a brooding asshole” thing way too far this season, and they have no real justification for it. in season one, mike is a fucking sweetheart. he’s selfless to the point of literally jumping off a cliff for dustin. he has a line where he’s specifically like “you’re All my best friends and i dont prioritize any one of you over anyone else.” in season two, he’s obviously moody and irritable, but that’s because he’s Insanely Traumatized. he formed a really close bond with el and then watched her fucking disappear into who knows where, he doesn’t know if she’s alive or dead, he’s terrified for will, it makes sense in season two why he would be so perpetually angry at the world and everyone around him. in season three, though, mike is in a pretty good spot. will is fine, el is fine And he gets to see her, his literal biggest problem at the start of the season is that he’s scared of hopper and his middle school relationship is in turmoil. it makes No Sense that he’d completely brush off will and then basically be like “fuck you gayboy” when will brings this up. like since when!!! does mike have such little regard for his friends!! it serves no purpose other than drama and it destroys basically his core character trait

will: obviously he was just like completely sidelined this season. i think it’s good that he has a storyline about feeling alienated from his friends as they grow up and he tries to cling to his childhood and the things that feel normal to him. my only complaint is that they gave him like, one episode to explore that storyline. also i really don’t think will would have so much outright contempt for el. like i get what they’re going for, i get that it’s part of his conflicting feelings about his own sexuality and his dynamic with mike and stuff, but el isn’t just a random girl to will. there should have been a little more nuance there imo

el: honestly don’t have that many problems with el’s storyline this season. i Loved the idea of her exploring an identity that isn’t just what other people think of her or expect of her, loved her hanging out with max, i even liked her investigating the billy thing UNTIL they just used her as a prop to make us feel sad for billy. but overall i think she had a really good story in season 3

lucas: again. severely underutilized. lucas is kinda just becoming comic relief which really bugs me because he was amazing in season one when he actually got to have a story arch that wasn’t just like. having a crush on a girl. i do appreciate that lucas had like 50 moments of heroism. idk if that was like, an accident, because they never really explicitly discuss it, but there were multiple moments in season 3 where lucas basically saved everyone’s ass. would’ve liked to see more of him and erica because she’s, yknow, his little sister and they barely interact the whole season. 

dustin: ok ok ok OK OK dustin is complicated this season because they kinda did a complete 180 with him halfway through the season. i was Really vibing with dustin for the first like, five episodes. dustin has always been written as kind of a lonely child, even within his group of friends, and so i think it’s natural that he have a season away from them. the sweetest thing about steve and dustin’s relationship is that dustin has always felt to some degree like an outsider in his own group (in season one he’s already come to terms with the fact that mike likes will and lucas more than him) and so it’s doubly sweet that he befriends this “cool” “badass” older kid who’s actually super lame and he can be lame with. and for the first half of season three, they really cashed in on that bond. dustin and steve wrote to each other while he was at camp, they have a secret handshake, he Literally says the words “you die, i die” like it’s an intense bond that’s only natural from someone like dustin who is so intensely loyal to his friends and finally has someone who he can consider to be His Own. but then the moment steve and robin get taken by the russians it’s suddenly like a switch is flipped and dustin is just. annoyed and exasperated???? he’s not really in a hurry to get help, he’s not that concerned when steve is like laying on the floor with his face absolutely smashed to hell, he’s MAD at steve when he tells him that he accidentally gave up his name UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF DRUGS like it’s insane. the scoops troop storyline as a whole has this really weird, kinda disturbing, comedic tone and i think this just falls under that. they ultimately decided that dustin being an exasperated keeper of two stoned teenagers would be way funnier than dustin being genuinely concerned that his favorite person just got his shit absolutely wrecked. also, the suzy thing was weird. 

[strawberryspeachy]

So on the last day of july i went clubbing

Almost immediately met a cute boy and he asked me to go to a hotel with him. I debated but ultimately went with him. He asked if i wanted to go on a date because fucking japanese assholes equate date with hotel.

Went. Hooked up. Then. He said he wanted to go back to the club because otherwise “it would be a waste of his night”

Yeah

So... went back.... watched him look for another girl. And felt like shit

Eventually a boy that was ok looking talked to me. I didnt ignore him and he got excited over me talking to him after having ignored other boys. I didnt intend to continue talking to him but he was so excited the entire time and was nice so i just stayed with him.

We left together and sat on some sidewalk and talked. I saw that both his arms had cut marks all over them

And as a fucked up person... i stupidly think that other fucked up people will be as empathetic as i try to be and my depressed friends back home

He told me some of his shitty homelife - apparently he doesnt have parents

He asked me to go to a hotel with him and i said no... so we went to eat instead...

He kept being overly nice (in words) told me that he works at an old folks home and that he wants to learn english and come to america and help me take care of my mom.... in a sudden way

Rationally im not stupid and know that was a line. But im pretty stupid in general

He kept asking me to be his gf and i told him id need to go on a date with him to decide that

I just wanted to say no but...

He didnt pay for my meal - ya im one of those girls that that bothers

We seperated and he continued to text my the next few days. We set up a date. He asked me to go to him in yokohama - an hour away from tokyo

Since id never been there i said yes. But this meant i had to pay an expensive train ticket

He did pay for dinner and afterwards convience store for me... mostly... asking if i had change

He wanted to drink at the pier and insisted i get a drink but didnt pay for it

And then took me back to his apartment

It ended up being fun

The next morning while he was showering i was just poking around at his stuff. Not actually looking for anything just curious about the things he has

I looked at his wallet (honestly to see the design but i also always wonder why japanese guys are so comfortable leaving money around who is generally a stranger)

And then. I found. Picture from a photobooth. Him amd soem girl. It was dated from a week before.

He told me the night we met that he broke up with his ex a year ago. But this picture looked very much like a couple

I asked him about it and he just said sorry and threw it in the trash (not a real trash. It could easily be taken out) he said it was from a year ago

After. Bit i took it out amd pointed at the date. He literally hummed and refused to comment ...but he told me hell only see me...

I shouldn’t take that as enough but i did and told him when i got home that ill only se him too. I told him i liked him - and to this point he kept saying he likes me over and over. He has not said it since this. Just said he was happy that i used his name.

After that i went to okinawa for a few days. He told me his sim card broke and he doesnt have wifi unless he goes to a convience store (as an excuse to text slow)

I got back the next week and stayed home all week from a yeast infection that i think he gave me. When he barely responded i told him that

Then he responded continuously telling me that i just got it on my own and hes healthy so it wasnt him

That weekend i went drinking with some friends and messaged him. He responded immediately and i called him. Asking when his phone got fixed. He told me the day before

Then he told me he has pink eye and sent a picture. He said he cant go out of his house because of it

The next week was my birthday. He said hed be cured the day after and we could celebrate. Then he cancelled saying the doc told him hes still contagious

A few days after he sent me a picture of him with makeup on and contacts in saying he went to the salan. I responded immediately asking if he was still contagious and tried to call. He ignored me

I tried to call more throughout the day

Nothing

Over 24 hours pased so i used another account to say hi to him. After 2 hours he responded to the fake account asking who it was

And i flipped the fuck out. I told him a bunch of reasons why he sucked and that he did and fuck him

Then he responded to me with long messages. Many of which i couldnt understand (hes used incorrect kanji before that which makes translation strained)

His excuse was that he felt sick and slept for 20 hours (but he ignored me for over 27)and that he wanted to answer his texts in order. That he doesnt look at him phone much and then got mad at me for not being worried about him and instead getting mad

He didnt addresss any of my complaints like the fact that if im his gf i should be a priority

But because im a sucked i felt bad for trying to hurt him and apologized.... he said hed forgive me if i buy him an accessory next time we hung out...

Yeah. Red flags. I too if i had other options... would have said. Thats a weird way to accept an apology.

Also before (on that first date) when we talked about our bdays cause his was a bit before mine. I asked him what hed wanna do as a late celebration. He immediately told me he wanted yakiniku (an expensive meat meal) and clothes or accessorys from an expensive brand he likes...

So he continued to take over 24 hours to reply to me. With very small responces - he never asks me questions. I asked him to call the night before i went camping and he said he couldnt because he was too drunk from drinking with friends. I went camping and came back and got him on the phone. I demanded him to call and he said he couldnt cause he was tired from work and would the following day

I told him it makes me upset that he doesnt talk to me and that i constantly dont feel good because of him. He just said sorrry. I planned to say this is over if he didnt agree to meet me. But he agreed to a date the coming sunday... the day before i began work again. He said hed come to tokyo and and had a plan. It sounded fun.

Well come sunday morning.... he cancelled. He said he didnt have money. I tried to call him several times and he ignored me.

I confronted him in person. He got mad at me for it. Said he got some sort debt collection and got frauded... someone used his name to take out money and he has to pay court. He said he doesnt have money because of it.

I asked why he never tells me whats going on with him (because im dumb and beleive this... actually i dont. I hope hes being honestly and just has really bad luck but)

This time like last time i told him the way he treats me is how really awful boys who are using me and playing with me treat me. And i cant trust him if hes like this but doesnt tell me why

Well...i was there... i offered to pay for out date.... besides the 11 dollars it takes to get to him

He asked me to put 5 dollars on his train card.... it takes 3 dollads to get to and from where we went. He... mad sure no matter where we would eat it would cost 40 bucks - wanting to drink alc and such. It costed 43 dollars. He wanted starbucks but i kinda said no by saying i dont rlly like starbucks - but he still wanted to get a dessert - 3 dollars

And... he wanted me to buy him that aftermentioned accessory... a ring. He looked at very expensive ones... i... would not have paid for even as stupid as i am.. the one he got was 15 or 25 I forget which...

The thing is... if he wasnt actually... if i wasn’t comfortable being with him i woulda stopped this before... unfortunately. As usual. Despite initially not being attracted to him i really enjoyed his company and find him to be fun...

He said that we should go home at 8 i asked about going back to him place and he said no because hes tired and has work the next day. He knows i also do too. At the same time. And i tried to convince him and he kept saying no. Then i asked doesnt he wanna have sex. He said that we should go to a hotel. And i protested that hotels are expensive and his apartments free and just a cheap train station away. He said hes too tired and just wants to sleep at his apartment but hotels are exciting so hed be awake at a hotel.

He pushed them and i said at that point id be spending like 100 dollars on the day and he knows i also dont have a lot of money.

We awkwardly went to a manga cafe that was only 5 dollars but it wanted you to make a card that costs 5 more dollads. And then i got fussy because too much stress literally makes me lose control of my emotions.

It fucking sucks and i hate it. I have no fucking control over my emotions when my stress is bubbling (which it almost always is) and boils over.

I asked him if he can even pay just the 5 dollars and he said he has no money. I asked how hes gonna get to work with literally no money and he said his conpany pays for it (yea japanese conpanies pay AFTER you go )

We left. It was a bad mood. He didnt storm away from me even though i was basically crying in the street (i have had this happen with even friends. I start crying and they just walk away so even though it should be expected of someone claiming to be your bf... ya)

Anyhow i told him i just wanted to cuddle and talk and kiss

He looked annoyed but i guess he thought those wants were cute and looked for a isolated place

Because were in japan

Couldnt find one cause we were in a city and he again just started saying lets go home. That hes tired and not in the mood.

But we were in a quiet enough play.

And im bitching here but ill take a quick break to say i kept hugging him and stuff which he liked despite saying he was really embarrassed

He told me ealier ok that because of this debt thing hes gonna work two jobs

Which. Terrified me. The first guy I went on a date with in Japan asked me to be his gf and to move in with him and said he had to work two jobs for a month to afford to move so he wouldnt have time to see me. He told me his progress for two weeks and then ghosted me.

This boy told me hell make time to see me when i complained about not doing anything physical when i wouldnt see him again for who knows how long

Welp. Todays saturday and that was sunday. And while at first i thought he was trying because he replied to my messages in or at 24 hours for a few days. Its gone back to the 17 hours

And i asked him to talk on the phone

And he just said not tonight because after his current job hes working at home too

And because im dumb ive waisted my whole saturday waiting for him to reply and crying.

[paddala]

so i saw tros again

i decided to take notes while i watched so here ya go

*spoilers ahead*

opening sequence is great, it really sets up the film, we don't know what's in store but they give us some ideas. not sure i loved seeing palpatine or even palps being alive, would have been cooler if he was some kind of poltergeist-y sith demon, also, kylo was on mustafar? we ain't gonna talk about that? ok

skipping to rey and leia, first, i hate the leia scenes, they seem creepy and overdone and not genuine, anyway, why didn't rose go with the trio to pasana? why don't we see more of rose? why am i screaming? aaaaand more creepy leia speaking vaguely to rey

now KOR and kylo fixing his helmet *eyeroll* and now the first order finding out about a SPY!!!!! how utterly stupid and it's literally a plot line from a fANFIC!!!! WHY

the trio on pasana, rey looking at the children longingly always kills me, bc she ends up alone without ben, when the only thing she wanted was a family, this is BAD LUV!!!! "i don't have one yet (a family), i'm just rey," that's what she should have said

rey and kylo first force bond, LOVE IT

lando i guess? i mean i get it but i don't at the same time, i love lando tho so i'm not complaining

i don't really hate anything about pasana, just wish rose was there with them, feels weird and wrong, that's my only complaint

WHAT WAS THE REASON OF FINN WANTING TO TELL REY SOMETHING BEFORE THEY "DIED" WHAT WAS THE REASON!!!!!!! THEY NEVER ACTUALLY TOUCH ON IT AGAIN

ok i love poe and finn bantering, but we didn't get one ounce of real finnpoe interaction

how does 3p0 have more lines than rose? it makes my brain hurt

why didn't we get more of KOR? like? what the fuck?

rey senses kylo, she said "everyone shut the fuck up im thinking"

chewie getting captured makes so sense to me but yeah

why didnt the trio just leave? why didn't rey just tell them that kylo was coming and that they needed to gtfo? when does this film start making sense? chewie wouldn't have been captured!!!!

rey trying to pull back the ship should have been like foreshadowing to us finding out that rey actually killed her parents, but no, she ends up being related to palpatine? make it make sense pls

i love zorii but i could care less about her and poe's romantic history

rey in kylos bedroom, LOVE THAT

JODIE COMER AS REYS MOM IS KINDA PERFECT BUT REYS PARENTS ARE SUPPOSE TO BE SHITTY SO IDK HOW TO FEEL

the way they made hux the spy......the way i hate it so much, hux should have been our other main bad guy, the way hux only wanted to be a spy to destroy kylo, FUCKING PETTY AND STUPIDDDD

rey sweetie i'm so sorry

this scene could have been so powerful if kylo said "rey we aren't so different, i know you killed your parents, the darkness is already in you, just take my hand" BITCH WTF I SHOULD HAVE WROTE THIS MOVIE BUT ANYWAY!!!!

"everybody thinks that they know me, no one does" or "i killed my parents, its been haunting me ever since" SHE HAS DARKNESS JUST LIKE BEN!!!!! THIS WOULD HAVE BEEN A SERVE BUT JJ IS A FUCKING CLOWN AND COWARD

i loved jannah, would have love to see her with rose, but jj is a fucking idiot

finn not being able to let rey do things on her own is SUUUUPER annoying and why i kinda hate his character in this film, it's a year later, ITS CALLED CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT LUV!!!!!

the dark!rey with sharp teeth sends me, what the fuck is dis hunny

"the dark side is in our nature" loved this, if only she wasn't a palpatine and actually killed her parents, THE FLAVOR

ok rey and kylo fighting, i get it, leia calling out to her son bc he's "going to kill her" when that's not what he wants, he's deflecting all her strikes, wtf? rey implailing kylo mAKES NO SENSE!? SHE DOESNT WANNA KILL HIM EITHER? WHY DID SHE DO THAT!? she should have accidentally grazed his arm, then forced healed, wtf is this movie, i ask again (ok i did some digging on this scene and someone said that rey is metaphorically killing kylo ren, which yes i love this, but it still erks me)

rey, i guess metaphorically, redeemed kylo, he's ben now, she gave him life force, he should have lived after he brought back rey, AGAIN WTF (i'm so stupid you guys know this lol)

han and ben......IT MAKES ME SAD BUT HAPPY!! i loved this scene so much, he really looks like ben solo here, he's so confused but he knows that kylo is over with, he's ben now, rey gave him the light he needed, WTFFFHSJDJSKDKJS.... "dad...." "i know" HI IM CRYIBG LSKSKSKSKKS

DOMHNALL GLEESON SWEETIE IM SO SORRY THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU DESERVED YOUR CHARACTER WAS FANTASTIC THEY DID YOU SO DIRTY #justiceforhux

rey chucking the legacy saber into a fire and luke catching it saying hey wtf you can't do that that's so fucked up as if he didn't toss that mf over his shoulder in tlj, oh man jj really said fuck rian johnson, also leias lightsaber should have been bens, IMO

luke's x-wing just magically coming out of fucking nowhere? didn't he scrap the ship while on ach-to? hm...RIIIIIIIIGHT

chewie dead? nope. c3po memory wiped? nope. ben solo dead? yeah fuck that guy

at this point i've lost interest, i'm waiting for the reylo kiss

p*lps calling rey her granddaughter, i'm literally gonna barfffff

BEEEEEEEEEEEEN MY BABY BOOOOOYYYYY OHHH IM SUFFERING

i love him i love him i love him omfg he's so powerful and sexy, literally came to save rey without a lightsaber i love this MAN

The Shrug™

A DYAD IN THE FORCE, THEIR LIFE FORCE BOND, HELLO!!!???? AND BEN STILL DIES AND REY ENDS UP ALONE!? I CANT

ben being thrown like that by p*lp, i've never hated a villain more in my life

idk like i kinda hate that all the jedi from the past came to rey, when ben was RIGHT. FUCKING. THERE.

oh my fucking god i hate disney "i am all the sith" "and i am all the jedi"…"i am inevitable" "and i am iron man" CAN YOU COME UP WITH SOMETHING ELSE

finn sensing rey dying through the force, i want to die

ben.....crawling to rey....fuck it hurts to bad

he's been through hell hes so scared and sad i hate jj so much

the kiss......cinematic masterpiece, should have ended there, but here we are

again. REY SWEETIE IM SO SORRY, her lightsaber is cool tho

"im rey....rey skywalker" NOT YOU

YUP WORSE STAR WARS MOVIE EVER

[fortissimohands-archive]

ok im gonna turn into a bojack horseman blog real quick because the last few episodes came out and I have Thoughts

this is kinda rambly but whatevs, you gotta get the infodump out

-it’s … a LOT harder for me to empathise with BoJack after the real Sarah Lynn story came out. I sort of assumed that his guilt over it was just because he took her on the bender (and was also a dick when she was a child) but the revelation that he waited 17 minutes to do anything, when he could have saved her, is just ... bad. especially since it was never mentioned before now which makes it seem like a retcon

-also, people are gonna try to argue with the above point by saying he was also drunk/high at the time, but I don’t think he was? I know they were on a bender together but we dont know how drunk/high he was as of the hotel/planetarium scene. im underage and ive never drunk alcohol or taken a drug stronger than ibuprofen so i might be wrong here, but I feel like someone whos sober enough to plan out how to avoid getting in trouble for that (right down to the detail of calling himself on her phone) is sober enough to not wait 17 fucking minutes to get someone medical attention

-Im lowkey upset about the lack of closure with hollyhock? we never even find out for sure if Pete told her that it was BoJack who gave maddy alcohol poisoning, theres a few comments that imply she does but her complaints about him not giving her space are perfectly valid by themselves and she doesn't really seem to be angry until after the interview comes out so who knows

-personally, based on how Pete hesitates at the end of A Quick One, While He’s Away, I feel like he doesn’t tell her, probably because he sees how much they look alike and guesses she might be related to him, BUT shes very suspicious that its him because lets face it that's exactly the sort of thing he would do, which is why she wants to keep her distance in the next episode

-I have mixed feelings on her letter never being shown? on one hand it feels kinda cheap that we never see it even though its arguably the main turning point that pushes him over the edge, but on the other hand I think its best this way because theres nothing she could write that wouldn't feel underwhelming after all the build up. sort of like how I lowkey hoped for a reveal of what Erica looks like, but I also knew that nothing they could animate would really be able to match all the jokes 

-also, random weird theory: when he calls hollyhock after reading the letter, it says the line is disconnected. except it sounds like hollyhock saying that? and her voicemail message up until then is “leave a message … if you’re a hundred”, so it’s pretty clear that she doesn't get voicemails often, and its not a stretch to assume bojack is the only person who would call her (her friends and dads would probably text). conclusion: her line isn’t disconnected, she just changed her voicemail to get him to stop trying to call her

-the fact that Judah's band is called “SPECTRUM of enchantment” confirms he is autistic and no I do not take constructive critisicm

-I fucking loved the reprise of Don’t Stop Dancing, which is my fave song from the series by far, but I wish it was longer and reprised all the verses from gina’s version.

-it was kinda weird that butterscotch was secretariat? they managed to pull it off pretty well but still, its weird how its never explained. I guess its because neither of them were developed as much as the other characters so having them both would have meant having two characters with only a few lines, but both were needed for the plot (butterscotch for the revelation that he maybe did care about bojack and Beatrice,secretariat for the poem)

-honestly I LOVED The View From Halfway Down. both the poem and the episode as a whole

-also. my finale predictions were basically this: it wont end with bojacks suicide, because weve spent 6 seasons following this guy and if he dies itll all be for nothing, but theres way too much drowning symbolism for it to not pay off in some way. so my best guess was a failed suicide attempt by drowning. so yay i was right!

-anyone else seeing symbolism with Hollywoob? like yeah, its a nice conclusion to both the Hollywoo gag and the recurring gag of mr peanutbutters shitty sign company, but the original reason the D was stolen was for Diane, back when Diane/Mr PB/BoJack was an actual love triangle. and I feel like the fact that it got replaced represents her choosing neither of them, but the fact that it’s a B instead of a D represents that shes changed a lot since then?

-alternatively: looking at it from mr peanutbutters perspective, the D was for Diane, back when they were married. the years of Hollywoo represented their shitty marriage and divorce (we know diane hates big gestures, so their relationship was doomed starting from when the D was stolen). and the B is for BoJack, since mr PB is one of the only characters who hasn’t at least implied that he wants to keep his distance from bojack

-im so glad we get to actually see how the voicemail affected diane. as well as address the fact that, intentionally or not, hes been making it her job to “save” him and that's not fair to her

-honestly im a big fan of the theory that BJ does die and episode 16 isn't real. I know its less of a theory and more of a fandom retcon because the ending came across as rushed and too open-ended (because honestly it kinda did), but the fact that the first shot is the last shot makes the theory feel really fitting

-my take on that theory is that the last 2 episodes are bojack’s hell? sort of like a Good Place-esque hell where you’re trapped in an infinite cycle of things being awful, but just not bad enough for you to realise you’re in hell. my guess is that first he goes through the hell of the dinner party (which he mentions is a recurring dream), but eventually he gets used to it so he moves on to the showcase, after which he ends up in a never-ending cycle of “waking up”, going to prison, going to the wedding, talking to diane, and starting over

-especially since when diane is persuading him to tell the truth about sarah lynn, one of the points she makes is that if he stops lying, he won’t have to constantly feel like he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. so now hes stuck eternally being scared of what will happen once hes out of prison, which will never happen because it resets on the roof. he’s made his bed, now it’s time for him to lie in it. forever.

[transrightsjimin]

honestly class consciousness is one hell of a ride bc i didnt think abt it much until more recent years. i told my friend as a kid we were poor nd my mom got so pissed at that, nd i mean shes right that we rly werent as bad off as it could be, the family is just working class. but when you suddenly realize youre not on equal footing w middle class ppl, or ppl like my uncle who is one of the very rare few who started working class and not highly educated nd ended up becoming a millionaire in the US (im still coming for his wallet istg), its suddenly all... oh wait there are ppl whose reality is not this full of hurt and few opportunities.

like, being in a university in one of the most diverse cities in the country nd still having so few poc on it and most poc u meet are international students, and having heard some posh classmates talk abt studying "just like our parents" like it's the most evident thing in the world (while im the only person in the family that did college level, nvm university, and family was super proud, it's not a given to us that you do this!), hearing classmates claim that poverty and class are not really relevant for the netherlands anymore bc you now have the nouveau riche and art is less elitist now, so apparently class is less of a thing?? nd university is just such a wakeup call or a slap in the face bc my primary school was called ghetto, my high school was called ghetto, but then my art college prided itself on being very "diverse" while i had never seen this many white students in one place, and it's even worse for my university.

shit like my brother being in prison all the time when i was younger, my best friend when i was 4 having to move away bc her mom ODed on drugs, living next to a house that had 5 weed plantations in it over the years nd our greek neighbours even got pulled into that mess bc they needed money, living across a 'coffee house' tht stored rifles in it, someone across the street setting his house (and thus half the street bc dutch homes are often connected as one row) on fire, my dad working 50 hours a week as a parcel deliverer bc w less hours he doesnt earn enough, even if the fucking job means carrying 80 kilo boxes up stairs and other bullshit, his stress leading to two TIAs (strokes), my mom being super disabled by many physical impairments nd illness nd still not being granted help in the household bc she had a 'healthy daughter and boyfriend' nd also her being left w/o an income for 2 years, practically every high school friend's mom being disabled in some way, then at my mail delivery job where my coworkers complain abt another deliverer bc it took her 3 months to get back to work again nd they called her ‘lazy‘ for not working immediately despite having multiple illnesses and disabilities bc, and i quote, my colleague said “i’m in my sixties and have arthritis and i’m working too“ dude :// hes literally the person my other colleagues say has had it hard and needs a break, and then those coworkers too need a break nd have disabilities nd are nearing pension age and still doing this work while trying to do household work and all that stuff at the same time. my mom said my cousin’s job (in construction; scaffolder) pays “really good“ (i wonder if its really that much bc it’s apparently around €1700-2700 on average) but that he already gets bad physical complaints from it while hes young nd formerly rly fit and might need to quit soon and then figure something out like studying for something else if possible.

the neighbourhood i used to live in as a baby was ‘too criminal‘ according to my parents so then they moved out to the town next to it into a neighbourhood that was eventually labelled among the top ranked ‘criminal‘ neighbourhoods of the country nd now i live in rotterdam south which is basically seen in the same way bc again, more poverty, more families with migration backgrounds etc. it’s like, you can never escape this negative image unless the whole bunch is gentrified or smth stupid and the poor are pushed to live elsewhere again. and just the whole thing of being at home, being at school, being at work, it’s such a trip bc university is so fucking different to me nd u see all these people there who are quite confident in getting good jobs nd u have business students with rich parents who are already some stupid fucking greenwashing entrepreneur aiming to become a CEO, nd even though ppl at my study w all these artsy ppl, they are generally not upper class, most still seem to be so used to the safety of being middle class and make these huge statements about poverty not really being a thing here.

nd then the whole stress nd anxiety tht my parents passed onto me, partially bc of their trauma nd them being fed up w my ‘laziness’ (executive dysfunction nd burnout lol), partially bc they believe strongly in this workers’ ethic thats strongly in line with capitalism (even if my mom used to be part of a socialist party nd still adheres to many of those ideas) but also with this calvinistic and Rotterdam ( / Rijnmond area) ideology that you need to work hard for the entirety of your life in order to be a decent person, so not so much for an economic payoff or ‘success‘; you just have to work hard. my parents always told me ‘you can rest when you’re dead‘ every single time i mentioned or even implied i was a bit tired and it was frustrating to hear. this mentality is what lead to my dad practically getting two strokes, and to my mom overworking herself nd being taken away by an ambulance on my birthday party, it’s the whole fucking reason i do not like the prospect of work bc it is just so associated w something awful you need to get done and that you need to exhaust yourself on it until you hopefully get pension money, if the govt hopefully doesnt raise the pension age even further than 67. and then you see ppl in uni talk abt fun future “careers” like what the fuck are you talking about? how are you gonna get a job in the arts and culture field in this pandemic? im already happy if im able to find a job and dont have to quit due to disability or a chronic illness that runs in both sides of my family. im sorry im being so negative but im stressed about jobs and i think i went on a tangent today all bc i saw one post abt being scared of PE classes nd my mind went to bad places. this is ok to rb or reply to btw, as long as youre a mutual

[tfw-no-tennis]

hhhhhhxh

more abt hxh bc my last post was too long n i had to split it off holla

so i left off talking abt when gon woke up....i love how polite gon is to pretty much everyone - hes such a good lad all the time. s/o to his aunt for raising him right (tho i think hes also just a rlly good boy inherently too)

also is he named gon bc ging was like ha ha im boutta be GONe lol seeya kid!!!! like ????

i find it interesting that kurapika and hisoka fought....we really havent seen them interact at all yet. also hisoka is so smirk-y i hate that bitch...what did he say to kurapika?????? 

this poor red shirt old guy lmao hisoka is SO clearly uninterested in fighting him and then he fucking dies. rip mdude

what did hisoka whisper to HIM??? guess we’ll never know #RIPLegend

oh mannnn if killua had just won against pokkle then he wouldnt have had to deal with illumi doing That to him :( my smug son......

leorio is such a good dude....also its so funny to me how tall and lanky leorio is, espec compared to the other 3 main characters lmaoooo

or maybe those 3 are just rlly short??? i mean gon and killua are literally 12, but whats kurapikas excuse

GODDDD I HATE THIS BIIIIITCH. FUCK OFFFFFFF tho the evil piano music slaps. but jeeeeesus illumi is so creepy and awful, and seeing him take off his disguise is not any better a second time...he and hisoka truly deserve each other wrow

does illumi have hair powers??? cause it kinda looks like it. or maybe hes just gay and dramatic 

ok but the sick electric guitar riff (?) that played when illumis face was revealed was lowkey kinda hilarious

man i was so wrong abt killua knowing that that was illumi :( poor kid

killua is immediately freaking out and meanwhile illumi looks bored as hell. dude ur the worst 

killua: [freaking out] illumi, completely blank-faced: hey 

I HATE HIMMMM even tho his catman design is regrettably kinda cute

why do illumi and hisoka both have such snatched waists i hate this

wtf so killua has another different brother??? i assumed he attacked illumi....how many fuckgin zoldyk sibling are there?????

leorio ur too normie for this conversation lmao. also wow fucked up family huh

killua looks so like...small and helpless, which is so at odds from what we’ve seen of him so far :( this poor kid

illumi totally has some weird brain powers man callin it now 

gon: wow killuas family sounds wack...  satotz: oh lmao you havent even heard the rest 

KILLUA ;_; 

this poor baby assassin :( :( :(

IMMM INCONSOLABLE. HE WANTS TO BE FRIENDS W/GON.......ARE YOU KIDDING....AUGHHHHHHHH

meanwhile gon decided he and killua are BEST FRIENDS like 10 mins after they met. GOD 

like in the recap ep he called killua his best friend ;_; and meanwhile killua doesnt even think they ARE friends god destroy me 

this calming classical music is throwing me off vbhjfjhbsdkgndks

i sense that leorio and kurapika are rapidly acquiring a new son

DAMN THIS IS SO FUUUUCKEDDDDD illumi is such a crusty bitch wow. leave killua alone asshole 

all that stuff abt killua like, only thinking he wants to befriend gon but really wanting to kill him....that sure sounds like some ‘worst fears’ type of shit for someone like killua....illumi is such a classic abuser wow

i have 2 know is satotz like, repeating this entire conversation verbatim in a calming monotone to gon rn. like....

LEORIOOOOO I LOVE UUUUUUUU AUGHHHH him telling killua it doesnt matter if illumi is his brother, fuck that guy, beat him up as usual and leave.....ooooughhhh leorio is such a good dude ;_; 

and the OF COURSE him saying the obvious - that gon and killua are ALREADY friends....i love this, i feel like leorio said all the exact things the audience is thinking...yet it still didnt get thru to killua bc hes so rattled by illumi appearing, and the abuse in general 

i think if gon were there things wouldve gone much differently 

of COURSE crusty bitch illumi is like oh ok now i have to kill gon.....biiiiitch i hate uuuuu 

also that just shows that hes lying to killua (which we already knew obvs), bc if it were inevitable that killua would kill gon to like, test himself or w/e, then why not just wait for that to happen? that would have a much bigger impact on killua than illumi killing gon....its obvious that illumi is just manipulating him, but killua is too BSOD to be able to tell (also, hes 12)

ok bitch illumi is preaching abt not needing friends but he and hisoka are definitely fucking and theyve been teamed up for the entire hunter exam it seems.....what a hypocrite. hate this guy

god im so glad we didnt rlly get to see whatever the fuck illumi did to that random hunter examiner guy’s face. jeeeeesus. also i cant tell but i wonder if him forcing that info out of the guy was the result of his freaky mind powers or if the guy was just like oof ouch pins in me face

LEORIO AND KURAPIKAAAA THE PROTECT GON SQUAD!! and joined by new member hanzo!!! who ironically beat gon up for 3 hours str8 like, a very short amount of time ago lmao. but still i love that sm

illumi u dumb bitch.....tho i dont buy for a minute that he didnt already realize that killing gon would disqualify him...he defs just wanted to get under killuas skin even more :^( 

KILLUAAAA ;_; when he goes to step back from illumi but illumi tells him not to....ughhh HATE this guy, leave this poor kid alone. no wonder he wanted to leave

illumi saying theres only 1 way that killua can stop him - does he mean by killing him, or something more specific, like some forbidden zoldyk murder technique? 

‘your beloved gon’ wow gay. theyre 12 and theyre dating ok. killua is literally that kid whos like wow i wonder if gon likes me...and meanwhile gon is like wow cant believe me and killua have been dating for 3 months now

leorio saying ‘we wont let him kill you or gon’ ;_; leorio ily sm...thats like the exact right thing to say - hes offering protection and reassurance as an adult figure...unfortunately killua is clearly too freaked out to even process anything outside of illumis gaslighting and abuse 

also illumi is defs doing something to killua w/his eyes via his freaky mind powers. js

illumi i hate you stop being weirdly cute. augh 

classic abuse tactics, being like ha ha nvm i wasnt gonna kill gon! jk!

killua just shutting down completely after that :( :( noooo

and then he kills that old guy and leaves, ‘proving’ that illumi is right....noooooOOOO

and now we boutta see gon go FULL shounen protag for the first time, oh FUCKKKKKK yesssss

this is the first time we’ve seen gon angry oooh man and of COURSE its on killuas behalf,....im so fuckign emo already looooord

god ok the episode preview where its gon saying ‘do leorio and i look alike?’ YES U DO LOL youre father and son so jot that down 

oof, gon and illumi have such fundamentally different POVs on like, family and life and morals, and you can tell by their 4-line exchange before gon does the ICONIC one-handed grab’n’fling

AUGHHHH gon saying hes gonna rescue killua....SO good...he recognizes that killuas family is wack as hell and killua shouldnt be w/them - the classic ingrained ‘found family is more important than blood family’ stuff

tho thats an interesting contrast to gon himself, whos looking for his deadbeat dad

‘but it wasnt his choice’ that so good ily gon BEST boy, hes so perceptive and good......he knows that killuas hand was forced and that he needs to be RESCUED (love that word choice) from his shitty abusive family

of course kurapika and leorio voiced complaints ;_; best parents 

kurapika should be a lawyer tbh 

leorioooo ;_; such a good dude, saying he should be disqualified instead 

HOW is leorio a stronger combatant than that old dude hvbajufjbsja that guy had some moves it seemed, and leorio has,....a knife? a briefcase? the classic premed attitude of ‘fuck it, i could die anytime, lets do this’? like.....cmon vhabjdfjbhsf i refuse to believe this man is of any use in a fight. ill believe it when i see it

pokkle pls ur not plot-important enough to be jumping into this convo rn

tho i am curious abt what hisoka said to kurapika. tho i agree that thats irrelevant to the discussion 

gon repeating satotz’s wisdom :’) and saying that killua will definitely pass if he takes the exam again...ough

gon is SO GOOD i cant get over it !!!!!!!!! AUGHHHH....recusing killua from his abusive family and making it so killua never has to see them again is like...so good. what a good good perfect boy.

also thats like, the perfect response to this. killing illumi would just start a ton of drama, and killua would be conflicted abt that....but removing killua from his situation is perfect 

ok ive ranted a lot ill talk abt the rest later woohoo

PREDICTIONS: 

i predict that hisoka will show up in this upcoming zoldyk arc somewhere bc illumis gonna be in it (i assume) and theyre dating. also hisoka is a central character so itd make sense for him to show up in the second major arc. tho tbh this could end up being completely false and i wouldnt be that shocked lmao

i think leorio is gonna get Big Sad someday bc hes like, so normal compared to the other MCs, and also hes suuuuch a bleeding heart (i love him....) so i feel like thats gonna lead to some sadness for him once his friends start doing crazy shit or w/e 

also i predict that if he gets nen itll be like healing nen or st. does that even exist??? idk jack shit abt nen lmao 

i think that illumi has hypnosis powers or something, even just based on design alone. it could defs be for aesthetic (character design in hxh is wild), but his eyes look noticeably different from any other characters. also he was doing some freaky shit to killua. also i held this prediction before seeing the part where this is brought up so we’ll see if its right lmao 

as for this upcoming arc -  ruth and i are wondering if itll be similar to the vinsmoke drama in one piece - character goes back to abusive family, squad goes to rescue them...and then character refuses to be recused. w/sanji it was partially bc the vinsmokes threatened to kill zeff, his TRUE dad, but i predict in this case it could be more like the zoldyks saying ‘look killua these 3 weirdos showed up looking for you, convince them to leave or we’ll kill them’ and killua will be like, oh shit bc like.....think abt it. the vinsmokes targeted zeff (and not the strawhats) bc they knew they could easily kill him. same goes here, i assume - a family of trained assassins vs Good Good Fishing Rod Smell-Power Boy (who hasnt thrown a single punch yet), Lanky Dr Man With A Switchblade We Havent Seen Him Use Onscreen, and Mx 2 Wooden Sticks, Bloodlust, and Arachnophobia - 3 For 1 Deal! its a no-contest. so thats one thing i could see happening, potentially 

im way too tired to remember my other predictions rip lmao

[shippeh]

conciteque replied to your post: Ship this abo coffee shop au is glorious tell us...

This is glorious but also I can’t help but wonder how you’re going to introduce your trademark angst in there…

kirishima’s really dumb and just,,,, can’t quite convince himself that the really cool well-dressed rough-edged manly alpha is actually goign out of his way to do anything for him so bakugou’s just like,,, well Fuck It, im Going Big, he plans a move that will leave Zero room for doubt because honestly this is taking up a lot of his free time and he’s spending too much money on coffee and courting gifts, so,,,

so he brings a thin box wrapped in black paper to the shop and gets to the counter but its the stupid pothead blond who is there instead,, ,kirishima’s on his break, man, i dunno, so Bakugou just says “FUCK” really loudly because he really did Have to Work himself up to this Big Move and kmarinaris liek ‘UH you want like a complaint card or-”

or what, bakugou doesnt know because he storms outta the building and just like crumples angrily into a bench outside, he even kicks a rock like he’s four years old and crosses his arms and the gift over his chest with a huff and then feels extra stupid because its Break, kirishima will be back, this is a very dumb alpha hissy fit he’s having right now, good thing it’s public courtesy that everybody wears scent blockers because he’d be souring the whole fucking street otherwise,,

then the doors slam open and there’s an audible movie-style skid as kirishima bursts out the door like ‘oh shit dude i heard u cussing are you okay’ and bakugou looks at him and its very poetic theres sun shining and the light glints off the spikes on his collar and hes very hard to look at so bakugou looks away and kirishimas like ‘aw man ur in a mood bro, well i got like 5 min or something on my break and honstly i draw in so many tips that they’d never fire me haha so-”

by the time he’s done talkin he’s already sitting next to bakugou on the bench and bakugou’s like ‘hnNNNNNnnnhh well at least there’s not a whole line of people watching this wild act im bout to do’ so he picks up the box and slams it over towards kirishima who takes it like :o oh huh and bakugou’s like “open it moron”

and kirishima tears the paper way too carefully for a rowdy boy and also too carefully for bakugou who has to stop the growl encroaching on his throat

but then he opens the box and hes like ‘hmmmmm how’d you know my shirt size’ and bakugou’s like ‘what?’ very thrown off and kirishima is pulling out the shirt better and unfolding it and kind of frowning because he doesnt get it and it’s too much to look at so Bakugou recrosses his arms and sternly looks away again

and then kirishima realizes what this used black shirt in his hands is because he can smell it and he’s like real soft ‘o-oh’ and then bakugou cant resist looking back at him and he’s just holding the fabric crumpled in fingers that shake and his eyes are wide and his pretty mouth is open and bakugous like

YEAH WELL in for a penny as they say,,, NO HALF MEASURES

so he swings himself off the bench and onto his knees in front of the omega and “oh, ow, fuck-” the asphalts real hot under his hands, here, ok, focus- at least kirishima’s staring at him, now, for sure, “i’m, uh-” ok he’s watched so many stupid clips about this whole courting thing and read so many guides but FUCK it SURE aint as easy as they make it right??? but then he meets kirishimas shocked eyes and ok ok suddenly its. a lot easier,,,

“I’m tryna to fucking court you,’ he says, ‘officially. for real. uh’

and kirishima looks at him and looks at the scented shirt and looks at him and is like ‘me???????????????’

and bakugou’s like ‘who the fuck else you dumbass’ and kiri laughs So Fucking Hard that suddenly bakugou’s taken aback like ‘ok uhohhhh’ but

kirishima sets the shirt back in the box and reaches his hand for bakugous, who offers his in turn, and kirishima slips by his hand entirely and grabs his wrist, holds tight and hauls him back up into the bench

and his touch lingers because bakugou’s sure as hell not able to let go

but eventually kirishima slides his hand back skin to skin and he’s blushing a perfect pink collar, his blush so pretty it almost washes out the red of his collar, and bakugou realizes with a sharp pain in his chest what kirishima’s just done and he slowly lists his hand over his mouth, pulls his palm and wrist up and breathes and breathes and 

kirishima smells like coconut and salt, like a brilliant beach on a vacation day that never ends

and its a faint, barely there wrist gland scent that fades before bakugou’s ready for it to be gone but he’s been scented and theres no denying it

and then five minutes is up and kirishima’s scrambling to his feet holding the shirt to his chest like it’s the solution to every problem in the world and they are both

speechless

but kirishima has to go back to work, so he does, beucase he has to

and bakugou trembles outside the cafe because that worked????????????????? it worked? it worked???

coconut and fresh air

he laughs so fuckin hard that kids across the street stare at him

[kataracy]

My job just does not care that rent is like 400+ huh cool cool im about to go awf under this read more if yall dont mind

FREGIURGTTKJLKKSAKDSFKAFSLJL GOD FUCKING FUCK?WHAT IS THE DEAL FFFFFFF ok story time:

So I work at corner bakery cafe its a weird fusion fast casual place where i make $9/hr, less than what i’ve made from my  last jobs but incredibly close to where i live like deadass across the street. So I have a manager that I steadily don’t get along with, he’s a blowhard. He picks a person to be mad at for the day, he hovers, he treats the girls there like his personal punching bags and I noticed all of that and started to dislike him to the point where I just couldn’t work with him. 

I would go in on days where he would close, because i work the night shift (my job favors the day shift btw. They only care about having people work in the day shift the dont give a fuck about night crew is ridiculous how much the dont clean up after their shifts and we have to pick up behind these grown ass women) and i would noticeably make little o no effort to converse with him, I just went in, did my job and went home. 

He would write me up for not saying hi to him. He would constantly start telling the GM I was being insubordinate when i was literally doing everything good at my job except talking to his sensitive ass. So I complained to the GM. I begged him to not put me on any more shifts with this manager because i was Tired of getting written u for nothing and I was tired of not having fun at my job. I was getting anxiety attacks while working with this dude it was so bad because again, he HOVERS. HE STANDS IN THE FRONT WHEN THERE IS OTHER STUFF TO DO AND JUST FUCKING HOVERS LIKE CAN YOU GO FIND SOMETHING TO DO and my GM said ok its fine we know (BECAUSE THE DONT LIKE HIM EITHER WE LITERALLY WOULD TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH WE DID NOT LIKE THIS DUDE OK NONE OF THE MANAGERS LIKE HIM) we will try not to put you on the same shift, we’ll let Z (the scheduling manager) know and if u do have to be scheduled with him make sure you find a cover and we’ll tell him to leave you alone because we know you know how to do your job.

So. That was a fucking lie.

They keep scheduling him with me. I tell another manager I don’t like him and why and he says I get it I’ll let B (GM) know. 

So I keep getting scheduled with him. And how the hell am I supposed to know when because, the managers have an entirely different schedule thats just their shifts and its fucking private. They end up scheduling me with him again and again and I just don’t show up one day I let the night manager know hey im not coming in on these 2 days, i found someone for this day but not this one so i hope yall find someone.

And then the next day, im getting called by a coworker like hey where are you are you coming in and i say no. no im not. i gave the managers plenty of time ( a whole fucking day) to find someone else bc they know i dont like working with this man. i said im not coming in repeatedly. im not coming in. but the coworker keeps fucking picking at me and saying hey they dont have anyone can you please come and then i get so pissed off i say im on my way and when i get there the fucking manager says you can go home i found someone.

I get so pissed. Why did you keep calling me then?

I didn;t call you they called you.

and the coworker that kept calling me and making me feel guilty for not wanting to work with this man who makes me uncomfortable and pissed and anxious, is my boyfriend. My fucking boyfriend decided this job was more important than my feelings that day and it was beyond hurtful dude im tearing up just talking about it because god it hurt, it was like a dramatic ass betrayal (AND THAT JOB IS SO DRAMATIC BY THE WAY THEY WILL GET SO FUCKING UNCOORDINATED OVER A SMALL RUSH ITS THE STUPIDEST SHIT)

So I go back there and im so angry now. Why have you been blowing up my phone to tell me to come in and being so dramatic. There arent even any customers in here. Why did you keep calling me asking me to come in when they already found somebody.

They just found somebody.

So you could call me and even come back home to fucking say they asked you to come get me> But you cant find the time to pick up the phone again and send a quick nvm?

The next day im scheduled. Another write up from the manager who loves writing me up. because he couldn’t be a fucking manager and just find a replacement no, he had to call and tattle-tell on me to the GM for nothing. I get called in to office by the scheduling manager.

So GM asked me to have you read this, its a warning. I heard you have problems with B and I din’t know that.

I find out they never fucking told the scheduling manager. they lied to me to just keep me coming in.

And... listen. look. I get that everyone in that place must have a complaint. I get that the managers must hear complaints all the time but. just because they do, does not mean my complaint matters less. Im a young woman who is uncomfortable working with an older male manager, how about yall give a shit about that at least. This job didnt care about me the entire time and that hurts even fucking more.

So now, im only getting two days. Because instead of the other managers just stepping up and working the easy night shift, instead of being accommodating and considerate, they decide to just shit on my feelings like this. 

The last time I went in. the manager is fucking talking to me because thats what fucking happens. The more you work with someone like that, the more they get use to you not liking them and being uncomfortable with them and they decide they dont fucking care, that they dont have o be accountable. that they can just keep messing with you. My last shift was so anxiety riddled I had to excuse myself 5 times (I counted the tissues) to go fucking cry because of how awful it felt to just, be surrounded by so many people who have the power to do something and yet, decide they just dont feel like it. 

He keeps his shifts and i have to deal with having 2.

He works on salary, I have  9 dollars an hour.

my bf and i had to move out of our 1 bedroom that we share with his dad because we needed the space and rent is an extra $100. I broke my glasses last month and cant afford to get replacements so i have been straining my eyes faily. I have to pay a full internet bill from my account and my bf gives me half of that. the dog wont stop fucking barking and giving the cat fleas. My mother and I dont speak, we have no relationship. I dont want to ask my aunts for money any more than i already do, i have no family out here, i only have like 3 friends that are close enough to visit and even then, i dont have a car and “close” equals driving distance and... i’m just

I am so exhausted haha. its been such a long few months. The ups and downs are there but, the downs have been so much more amplified lately its hard to see a silver lining so i just, idk, I dont know. I do not know.

I got our new schedule today. Only two days. This ko-fi stuff and this commission stuff guys its what i have right now. Its what i need to work because nothing else is. lol im not a begging person, im not like... this. Im not so open but, i could really use any help right now, please. Just share the links, if u dont see something u like maybe someone else will, and that hope is the only thing i can look forward to right now. thanks for reading this far if u did. thanks for listening to me yell about avatar for all these years thanks for following me and giving me notes and making me laugh and making me smile and im burned out after all of this so, take care guys.

[th3okamid3mon]

[SPOILERS] Review/Ramble on Roma (2018) Dir. Alfonso Cuarón

So i just watch Roma, a movie around the 1970´s (1971 to be precise) in México, Ciudad de México

For anyone who doesn´t know, there´s this suburb called Roma, that´s why it has that name, its not in Italy or anything jaja. 

By now, probably everyone has seen it or has been like ¨OH, SPANISH! i don´t want to read the english subtitles ¨ (i hope that´s not the case because SO HELP ME DOG), in my unprofessional and cinema student-ish opinion, I like it. 

The movie is recorded in black and white, not sure with what camera or why the decision was to make it that way but the image has great quality and it makes the focus more on the story and characters than the surroundings (not that the art wasn´t important, in fact, it must have been a hell of a work to make certain pallets of colors to make it contrast different to each, also to not make everyone blend together into a weird spot). Cuarón direct, write and was in charge of the photography (which is what he is known for) , his writing was actually really balanced between the serious main parts of the movie, the common daily basis humor and interactions between the characters. 

Most of the shots were master shots with panning, there were no medium shots nor close ups (At least not until the end of act 3) . Doing this type of shots gives the viewer a chance to see the surroundings of the characters and to view whats going on around. I think this is because, even if we follow the main family and the protagonist Cleo (Yalitza Aparicio), the main point could be that they aren´t the only ones with a life and with problems. We can see other people, we can see them doing their own thing, it gives the film a more genuine feeling about a really busy street, city or town, we can see there´s more life outside the house of the protagonists. 

The whole story has a lot of tragedy, in fact there´s 2 whole stories full of tragedies: Cleo´s (the maid) story and Sofia´s (the employer or ¨patrona¨) story. Cleo is working like a maid and nanny for a family, she doesnt seem to be miserable, just indifferent about that job. It doesnt mean she is uncaring towards Sofia´s children or anything, its just her usual routine that she already knows. It is really nice to watch 2 people which share the same language talking like a usual common thing, other than just spanish. In this case, Cleo and her friend talk in mixteco a native language of México, im glad to see it treated as something usual for them and not like a surprise because there´s still a big community of indigenous people that still practice certain traditions and still talk languages. This includes more people and shows the diversity in the country as well as introducing more talent to the filming industry (not just certain type of people). Cleo isnt mistreated by anyone at the house, which is nice to see (other than the usual racist comments and mistreament), however she has this impotence appearance when her employer gets angry at her (obviously anyone would be terrified, specially if you lived with them and you could be potentionally thrown out). At some point, Cleo gets pregnant and its horrified when she: a) cant convince Fermín (motherfucker 2) that he is the father, and b) isnt sure wether her boss will throw her out of the house or not. 

Sofia is the employer, her children are Sofia, Paco, Toño and Pepe. Her husband Antonio (motherfucker 1) is a doctor which she loves, but once the story starts developing you get to know in the background that their marriage is crumbling. He goes on having adventures with other woman and lying to Sofia, meanwhile Sofia tries to keep it together while her children are acting like children and pre-teenagers. 

One thing i found interesting is the decision the writer (Cuarón) took when he made almost every male character an asshole. You have Antonio which lies and cheats her wife and then you have Fermin who bails on Cleo once she tells him she´s pregnant, also he threatens to kill her and her unborn child with martial arts (it...got a bit weird...). I would add the kids Paco and Toño because they were acting like disrespectful asshats, but I´ll pretend it was the hormones of teenage years and the whole situation between their mother and father. There´s also el compadre (i think its brother in law) of Sofia who tries to ¨comfort her¨. In general, this movie has certain violence towards female protagonists. 

Another thing i found interesting was how everything was according the era, like everything around the characters was moving independently of the characters. Everyone had to move according to the circumstances around them which they didnt had control over. Most notorious example: 1971, 3 years after Tlatelolco 

[NOTE: the image above is a real picture took from the protests from 1968]

The characters move around while events like the protests of students are still going around, the children are talking in one scene bout someone who got shot and in another sequence we see Cleo and her patrona going to a store to buy a crib which is interrupted by the screams of horror from the students, then a pair gets inside the store screaming ¨They are killing us!!¨. Then a group of porros (people who are paid by the government to start riots and make the opponent side the responsible of the excessive force used by the police, AKA, making them the guilty ones) get inside and shoot them. That whole scenario is independent of the characters, yet they are involve in it because they are there, and they cant do anything because thats what a person would do in a stressing situation: nothing, besides, Cleo is pregnant at that point so she would obviously wouldnt make any dumb move, specially when she sees that one of the porros is Fermin. 

[NOTE: this shot is from the actual movie, AKA: ITS NOT REAL]

Including social and politic events in the movie gives it a more authentic atmosphere, it makes the viewer get inside the story and give a view and let us appreciate how México (my country) looked back then as well as giving us a look to everyones personalities during this different time period. 

The interactions of the children and Cleo was the sweetest most adorable thing i have ever seen. Cleo is looked like a human being and not like a third type character, she has a voice and a personality, which is something we dont usually see when it comes to maids. She shares fun with her friends, she has dates, she laughs, she cries, she is human. She also shares part of her culture, with the children and Sofia isnt bother at all. Cleo sings lullabies in mixteco to the little girl Sofia, who gleefully sings with her. Making it so common, so normal and such a nice moment normalizes it; in the shot Cleo and Sofia says prayers first and then Cleo sings her lullaby. Its great to see the interactions and intersections of cultures like that, both are mexicans but come from different homes and cultures, yes, cultures because at the end of the day México is very diverse, it doesnt have just one way to live. There are different cultures within the country. It is really important that we see it as the normal, our normal because we need to include more people, to make it ok for everyone to feel included in the same place, we are from the same place after all. 

Other important point is the fact that this women have each others back in some sense and in most of the movie. Cleo helps Sofia during her times of need when she is stressing over her husbands infidelity and economic state, while Sofia helps Cleo during her pregnancy. Teresa, Sofia´s mother, also helps Cleo by getting her to a store to buy a crib and Cleo´s doctor is actually a woman, so most of the movie is woman helping woman. NOTE: Im not saying the men in the whole movie are awful people, SOME of them are, the one who have more interactions with the main protagonists. I dont want a radical feminist group to take this movie and twisted like they usually do with EVERY fucking thing. The main point of the movie is looking the hard and tough lives of women from different cultures and how they move on, some man do help like the guy who drive them around or Ramon (a side character which i think it was Adela´s boyfriend, Adela is Cleo´s friend), END OF THE NOTE

CONCLUSION: 

It is a good movie that shows a common part of life which involve good and bad things, from tragedies like infant death or civil massacres to the hopefulness of a better way to live, because the end of the movie comes full circles with everyones life but with hopefulness of a bright future. In this case the saying ¨What doesnt kill you makes you stronger¨ fits perfectly. 

The photography and art departments did a great job making the ambient from the 70s and giving the atmosphere to each scene and sequence a heavy and light feeling depending on what was going on. My mom was delighted to see certain places during those times because she remembers during her childhood looking at those different signs and streets, so the ambience was on point. For some reason I feel Netflix sold their soul or something to make this movie cause THOSE CARS LOOK EXPENSIVE, or maybe it isnt as expensive as i thought (should look up that later). The only complaint i could think of is that it should have pass to movie theaters a bit longer or at least project it again cause it can be more appreciated in those places than in your home with a faulty internet (my internet went out at least 7 times); also the effects of the babies were... really awkward to the point of being distracting and funny. They really looked like dolls, they bounce a bit, specially during the scene where Cleo gives birth to the death child (I shouldnt have laugh to that scene...but that damn doll look so plasticy... ) 

All and all, it was enjoyable to watch, the acting was good, even for the children. They did a great job, some of the lines were spoken awkwardly by the oldest kid, as to sound more mature? i guess that was the direction they went for. The characters were likable, they could make you laugh or cry during different times and make you feel for them. 

I think anyone could watch this but it is, what everyone could consider, a slow movie. So make sure to have everything you got and take time to appreciate everything around them, because i think this is like a candy you need to look around, everything they put its meant to be looked at. I give the movie 8/10 

[LOOKATTHATDAMNFUCKINGSHOTHMMMM!!!!GOODSHITRIGHTTHEREIFIDOSAYSOMYSELF!!!HOLYSHIT!!!NOMAMESESTASUPERCABRONALABERGA!!]