#like legit on repeat for like 4 hours...

[appleciderp]

Soap is clingy in the mornings

Day 7 (the weekaversary!!) of drawing Soap in Kilts for @empresscirque

[txna-blxckthorn]

here’s the “14 levels of love in the arabic language” for all you hopeless romantics 💕

1. Al-Hawa الهواه (Attraction)

Love begins with attraction and lust, which is described in Arabic as "al-hawa". This is when emotions are running high, but they're still indefinite... kinda like when you're swooning over a crush. 

2. Al-Sabwa السبوة (Amusement)

This phase depicts the sweet spot before things get real, when two people are enjoying each other's company without putting a label on the relationship. The "flirtationship" hasn't evolved into a legit relationship yet, but it might.

3. Al-Shaghaf الشغاف (Passion)

This is when feelings of actual love begin to surface and people are basically love-struck.

The Arabic word "al-shaghaf" refers to الشغافة (al-shaghafa), which is the outer layer of the heart.

4. Al-Wajd الوجد (Preoccupation)

"Al-wajd" is when you just can't stop thinking of your loved one. You are preoccupied with him/her and want to spend every waking hour with him/her.

5. Al-Kalaf الخلاف (Infatuation)

"Al-kalaf" refers to a state of powerful longing accompanied by hardships and suffering. This is when people say "I love you so much it hurts" and actually mean it. 

6. Al-'Oshok العشوك (Adulation)

"Al-oshok" is used to describe the excessive love and profound admiration lovers experience when they become intimately familiar with one-another.

7. Al-Najwa النجوة (Heartburn)

Yes... Arab romance is all about pain. "Al-najwa" is when love engulfs one's heart entirely and triggers feelings of sadness.  

"Najwa" is derived from the Arabic word النجاة (salvation), as lovers need to be saved from this state of severe heartache.  

8. Al-Shawq الشوك (Longing)

This is when you feel a deep longing for your lover and a strong attachment to him/her.

9. Al-Wasab الوسب (Excruciating pain)

"Al-wasab" translates to pain and illness. In this stage, love is just not healthy. There is so much pain and suffering, it's the stuff for epic love poems.

10. Al-Istikana الإستخانة (Submissiveness)

I repeat: NOT HEALTHY!

This is the state of humiliating and blind submission we often see in detrimental relationships. 

11. Al-Wodd الوود (Friendliness)

Couples who have reached this degree of love are #relationshipgoals. They are not only lovers, but also the best of friends. 

"Al-wodd" translates to amiability and friendliness. It is the purest, most selfless and most delicate kind of love. 

12. Al-Kholla الخولة (Unification)

"Al-kholla" is defined as love and friendship that are ingrained deep in the heart.

In this stage, you believe that your lover is "the one" and that you will never find a more perfect match (#soulmates).

13. Al-Gharam الغرام (Fervour)

"Al-gharam" is defined as attachment to something and not being able to let go of it. This is when lovers feel like it is impossible to live apart and always find their ways back to each other regardless of the circumstances. 

14. Al-Hoyam الحُيام (Madness)

"Al-hoyam" refers to madness and insanity caused by excessive love. So basically, this is when lovers lose all sense of reason and go absolutely nuts. 

[katyspersonal]

Continuation of the previous post about SOTE adventures from today! (More like the end)

1) So, after finally trying to fight on Torrent and beating Tree Sentinel very quickly without even getting hit myself, I've gotten a BRILLIANT IDEA to try and battle Gaius like this too. That was really pointless. In fact, I just spent the next hour pushing for it and not getting further than reducing his HP to like 60%... Because you know, doing the same thing over and over and OVER hoping that this time the result will be different is definition of insanity. XD

2) Eventually I gave up and tried something else. In this case, to relocate my stats; I have 80 Int as sorcery user, but here it was useless, so I relocated these stats and some extra in those I needed more.

So, uh... Good news: turned out that Int reduces magic damage, so my 80 Int was crucial for surviving his attacks. Bad news: I wasted 2 Larval Tears to learn this lesson. 🤡🤡🤡

3) I tried to do more stuff and the very last thing I tried was to give Mimic Tear Morgott's blade to spam fire attacks, while I have shield and stab him with Scarlet Rot. I've already noticed that fire was dealing much more damage, but by that time @jarognieva whom I asked for help answered me!! So, we cooperated!

4) .....

Turned out that she forgot to change her name from МАМКА ТВОЯ)))0)0)0)0) АХАХПЖПЛАОП

(It says 'your mum' XDDDD)

5) Jara also confirmed that this boss WAS weak to fire and holy, so that sealed the deal with Morgott's blade! I legit didn't have a better fire skill weapon on hands.

6) We made a great attempt at first, she is very strong with holy attacks! We only lost because earlier I relocated all flasks to Crimson, so I ran out of skill and could not use it again because I didn't have any Cerulean (🤡🤡🤡)

7) BUT WE WOOONNN OH MAN WE WON

(Damn, how does Messmer keep attracting so many friends? I read it as both them being cursed and being close with THE war person (Radahn) were important here)

@jarognieva YOU ARE SUPER HELPFUL HOW DO YOU EVEN DO THAT GDHYGGHTGFH AAAA I WAS SUFFERING FOR GOOD HOUR AND MORE ON THIS BOSS!!!!!! POWER OF FRIENDSHIP BITCHES!!!

(Also it was the second time we started to aggressively smash jump button after beating the boss XD It should become the running gag now! Or should I say..... the jumping gag? *gets shot*)

8) I was ready to go for the day since it is late and I need to cherish what little sleep I can have, so for the last instance I decided to go and check new stuff at Enia's!

Not much to add here, though seems like it would be a good spell for my random surprise Faith build moments! Though two overlapping stalks repeating the Erdtree pattern did remind me of that overlapping serpents symbol from previous post.

I was JUST questioning what weapon would actually WORK while I am fighting on Torrent! Thank you king xd

So he invented that cool sorcery while trying to prove Radahn that he was a better sorcerer!

9) Interestingly enough, first at Enia's I only could find Gaius head, chest and arm pieces but not the leg one!

I wondered if something was wrong with that! The description did mention that he was one with his boar after all! My assumption was that simply his set was not going to have the legs piece, but... it did!

10) So, outside of the area where we battled him, surprisingly there was an ALBINAURIC WOMAN! Just a normal one, riding a wolf and all!

And she dropped... this:

Ohhhh boy. So Albinaurics can't wear boots and pants, now? Oh boy. Well, I told that Loretta was likely not an Albinauric, but the girls didn't believe me. 🌛 This feels like it confirms this! Like I said, she is oddly similar to Dung Eater in cosplaying the species she is protecting vghhggh What a realization....

11) So Albinaurics were pretty much servants for Carians (like Pidiya), and Rykard straight up tortured them, so that makes the fact that one was like an older brother for Radahn interesting..? Perhaps, a glimpse on the "kinder former self" of Radahn that presumably was "lost" to war-mongering (if not some corruption due to wrestling with the Stars)? If Miquella yearning for younger version of Radahn (as far as I got spoilered) is any indication?

12) Another one for that type of talismans is also found nearby:

13) The reward at the end was 5 Scadutree Fragments! Yaaay!!! All scattered near 'Scadutree Chalice'. What an object 🤔

_____________

So yeah, a lot of optional stuff was tackled today! It is so satisfying to finally adapt to a hard boss and defeat them, really. For real, Soulsborne games do not need difficulty selection.

[izzy-b-hands]

Feeling slightly better than i have been at this moment (hence being on Tumblr for more than a half second before my body goes 'hm, actually, that's too much. put the phone down or i make u throw up 🥰' as it has been all week since this back pain bullshit began

(more blathering abt this stuff and work and just. general life update as of this week below the cut)

But realised that's probably only bc:

-Housemate (who has been an absolute angel thru all of this and has looked after me better than my own mother ever has tbh), got me some Pedialyte style drinks, and I've made it thru nearly all of one today (a miracle bc the nausea has otherwise been constant even when the pain isn't as bad and has made eating more than like. broth and saltines and gummy edibles basically impossible)

-Im stoned, on a increasing rotation of meds (acetaminophen, ibuprofen, mucinex which it turns out has potential off label use for muscle spasms, as Housemate researched and found out, edibles, magnesium, and now ginger pills to help the nausea) all of which im grateful for but combined leave me feeling less in pain but a bit. idk. blah? brain foggy, more than usual? Tbh it's probably the pain making the brain fog, the pills just can't do anything for that and i don't fault them for that, but for a brain fog example, I've been trying to place an order for some local chocolates to ship to my mum for mother's day, and legit it's taken me ALL WEEK just to get the site open, to the shipping menu, and just today actually putting things in the cart, but I haven't managed to check out yet bc just getting the cart together that made me feel like i needed a nap. This post is the longest thing I've typed in days, and I'm struggling rn to keep going..But i started it, so we're finishing it, back spasm at a level 4 of pain be damned

-and im doing basically nothing aside from stretches (gentle yoga ones i already know the forms for, and some pilates gentle type things i remember from when mum joined that fad lol), using one of our wand vibes on my back (never had done before, they actually do work for that too! kinda fun to find out, just wish i hadn't found out like this!!), laying on a heating pad and wedge pillow, and trying to nap (bc the pain is worse at night so I've somehow been sleeping even worse than i usually tend to)while YT videos and/or the 1973 JCS plays on repeat.

I mention all this bc i work this weekend, and i don't want to have to call out for the first shift tonight. but like. if im struggling just to type this post up (nvm that i have my zine checkin to finish and send in as well, if Nads or anyone else from the group reads this pls know i will make sure i have it done by the due date! it's just been taking. longer, with this back pain mess), keeping my brain on track is difficult rn (as evidenced by...this entire post), and my back is starting to twinge up to a 3-4 overall already bc i let the heating pad turn off, thinking that maybe, just maybe, if I'm feeling okay enough to be on Tumblr then maybe that's a sign this is finally over, and my back is done making life miserable...

then maybe work isn't a great idea. but it scares me every time i have to call in (and I've tried not to unless i absolutely had to, but they're very particular abt ppl basically never calling out, so i know that even if they acknowledged i sounded as sick as i was, that doesn't mean this wouldn't be reason enough to fire me)

I just don't know what to do. i want to work. i want to make money. i also don't want to have to mute my mic bc my back spasms hard enough to make me vomit tho, and that's unfortunately still a very real possibility (spent entirely too much of this week throwing up from the pain tbh!!! not happy abt it, i do not like being sick like that, for any reason!!) The last reason makes me think calling out is the right thing. but. i have a few hours yet, so im gonna see how it goes, acknowledging that i probably do need to call out, whether i like it or not

(if for nothing else, to maybe be recovered for my first set of doubles on Sunday)

[clairehadenough]

I am sorry for the novel I am about to send but I can’t contain myself. The themes I keep coming back to about the cult of delulu:

1. They talk about plot holes like it’s a movie rather than a small public sliver of a real persons full and complex life.

2. They center their own feelings about the situation as if they are part of the equation or demand they should be taken into account in the celebrities life. This is why they get so mad when they aren’t guessing correct in their malicious rumour mongering. It shows just how little they know and understand and how vast the divide is between the object of their obsession and themselves. This makes them feel bad and they lash out.

3. They loveeee the attention and spend literally 16-18 hours a day stoking it and sending themselves anons to boost the perception of their own popularity. I know they have legitimate followers (every cult needs a following and detractors!) but many blogs receive similar anon messages week after week that mimic the writing style and terminology of the blogs themselves. I am sure some are legit but certainly not all. Also see above as it’s the main outlet of the emotional instability reality causes within them.

4. They repeat the same patterns over and over from other fandoms yet fail to make those connections EXCEPT when trying to use it as evidence of how frequent “pr” relationships are. It also closes out the possibility that relationships can be both real AND have some usefulness for PR. It’s not either/or!

5. They fail to acknowledge that misinformation is literally contagious. They are hitting all the indicators that cult and misinformation experts highlight about conspiracies such as Trump and Qanon.

They wonder why there is such vitriol out there towards them? It’s called consequences. It’s because they are spreading like a virus and perpetuating harm. And they are recreating fan toxicity that has happened in most every fandom of a famous single man. It’s so basic it is frightening but they can’t admit that because this situation makes them feel special! Only THEY are privy to the “truth” and the truthtellers are the special martyrs who are being treated unfairly. It means that the cult leaders and their followers get to feel special and a part of something and the bad feelings have an outlet (abuse directed at who doesn’t agree and the villains in their fake narrative - in this case, the woman, the family, the man’s staff, management etc)

The only reason celebrities think about their fans is to make money or protect themselves from harm, the rest is just extra. I am sure many of them enjoy being around fans in certain contexts and like when their work is appreciated but let’s be honest, they are getting paid hundreds of thousands or millions to do things like cons and fan service.

I am sorry for the novel it’s just very fascinating to watch and why I will maintain that casual gossip and fandom are incompatible. Much of this is rehashing things said by luminary much more intelligently months ago but it’s obviously still relevant. It’s why I think it’s not strategic to get bogged down in all the little narratives of picture analysis etc because the content will always change but the pattern remains.

THANK YOU FOR THIS MASTERPIECE 🥹

[ask-cthulhu-mythos-au]

Lore:

(Cthulhu's POV)

September 19, 1234

"Well Cthulhu, it looks like you've done so much sin... you're incapable of doing good," The doctor said uncertain.

He hates me too, he's probably gonna put me on something stronger than Fentanyl. Something to actually damage me.

He hands me a small box, maybe the size of a human pointer finger.

"Take one of those everyday. If you miss a day, stop taking them entirely till our next appointment.....in 6 months."

"Can I just take one now, and get this over with."

The doctor hesitated, "Actually yeah, you can."

I popped open the box of small pills. I swear, this σΗιτ was smaller than a fingernail, at least to me. The pill was the shape of a normal pill, thankfully, and had a off-white tint. I didn't hesitate taking it, I just wanted to make it was any kinda drug. I took the pill and immediately felt it 'working'.

"So, how do u feel?"

"Like I just took a ΦυςκιΝg pill (¬_¬)."

"Alright well, you're done today. You know what to do, have a day-"

"Yeah, yeah, shut up already," I opened the door letting myself out..I tipped the front desk lady...for some reason..even she thought it was weird.

~•••~

I sat on my couch depressingly.

Whatever. I guess I should just wait for Tsy to get home.

*Sigh* I grabbed my phone and opened social media. Nothing new, art, videos, more cultists tryna sacrifice their useless σΗιτ to me.

I feel bad. Maybe I should go apologize to Kthanid. I'M the reason he's about to kill himself. I told the Great Old Ones to help me. I destroyed my family. *Sigh*

I got up the off the couch and left out the door, on my way to Elysia. The fly there isn't super far, maybe quarter or half hour away. Φυςκ I don't even know what time it was when I got there. Maybe 2:45?

Anyway, I 'pulled up' to Kthanid's Palace,

KNOCK KNOCK.

That dumb βιτςΗ answered the door.

"What do you want?" Kthanid said angerily shoving me inside, knowing this wouldn't take a few minutes. I sat down on the couch.

"I'm sorry."

The room became cold, and quiet. Kthanid's expression changed. He went from annoyed to anger. I swear, he wanted to rip my face off.

"I'm sorry. Come again," he said annoyed.

"I'm sorry," I repeated calmly.

Kthanid stood up angrily, "OH YOU'RE ΦΥςΚΙΝΓ SORRY?! YOU'RE SORRY HUH?! WELL OF YOU WERE SO ΦΥςΚΙΝΓ SORRY YOU WOULDN'T HAVE TORN OUR FAMILY APART!"

I stood up too. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ALL CALL YOU?! THEY CALL YOU A SWEET, INNOCENT, BEAUTIFUL, TREAURE!"

"SO?"

"THEY CALL ME A RUDE, DIRTY, UGLY, FAMILY DISAPPOINTMENT! SOMEONE WHO WILL BRING DISHONOR AND DISAPPOINTMENT TO OUR BLOODLINE!"

The air grew tense.

"Well they were right for the most part. You have an attitude problem, you were the first one in the family to use they're 'gift' the moment they got it-"

"You late bloomers. It was fun."

Kthanid rolled his eyes, "you're attractive enough to have mated with 3 different ladies. But you're always been a disappointment."

"Disappointment my @$$, at least I still have my damn family!"

Kthanids hands started glowing (usually signed as usage of power)

"C'mon Kthan! You wouldn't hurt your own family! Would you?"

"I don't know.. would I?"

Kthanid Lunges at me, I pushed him off quickly, not before getting a claw mark on my face.

The air became denser, I thought I would pass out. The blood from my nose starting gushing, rapidly, until I was loosing lots of blood. My legs became numb and fell back onto the couch. Kthanid sat back down too.

"Be careful. I don't think your delicate, cold-blooded, asthmatic lungs were made for the thick, warm, dense, killing air of Elysia."

I gasped for air, rapidly coughing. Hastur peaked our from the corner.

"H-hey Kth- OMG CTHULHU-SAMA YOU'RE HERE?! ARE YOU OKAY?!"

Hastur ran back into the bathroom grabbing an inhaler, gently giving it to me. He also got me a piece of gauze and some medical tape. I took my two puffs and gave the inhaler back to him.

"I don't need your help nerd."

"Don't call him that!" Kthanid stepped in.

Hastur whispered something to Kthanid.

"Oh- ya! Uh Cthulhu, you should go. I have something to do. I won't be back, and don't come back."

I sighed, again, again. I flew back down to R'lyeh, missing the VERY breathable air.

~•••~

"Hey, cu-ki (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠)"

"TSY!" I run up to Tsathoggua, hugging the life out of him.

"Hey! Are you okay bb? Did something happen? Why are you being so clingy?"

I picked Tsy up and plopped him on the couch, sitting on his lap and told him about EVERYTHING.

"You're lucky to have Hastur there, I'm wlad yo'we okii neow though." *Forehead kiss*

I leaned into Tsa's chest, as he cuddled me, slowly falling asleep.

I had talked to Hnarqu about it the next day, and he told me that the damage I caused was wreck less, and unfixable. No one really could forgive me.

[torturedpoetdeptchair]

Ur wrong about debut not being a famous album lmfao. Sorry but if you ask a random person on the street to name a taylorbsong, they're not gunna name a newer taylor song over country taylor. Our song, teardrops on my guitar, Tim mcgraw, back to December, mine, the story of us. Just because swifties shit on debut doesn't mean it didn't have HUGE cultural impact. How do u think taylor got a grammy for fearless to begin with babes?

lol so, this is def in response to reblogging that past about the lac of debut on Eras? And hey, I love Debut, I listened to it all the time and it was HUGE—seventeen years ago. It’s also just not her sound now! That doesn’t mean it wasn’t famous or important, but like, babes—half the songs you just listed there are Speak Now tracks. (Which are great and I wish all the tracks you listed were on the setlist but that is in the fantasy where we can add another 30 minutes to a 3 1/4 hour show so…)

Ultimately though, especially young people these days don’t know of her as a country artist, because legit 6/10 albums are pop!

You have to take into account that she is using tiktok on purpose to promote this tour and her work to gain a new generation of fans!! If she were headed back to country, maybe she would give us more of that, but those moments of fearless in particular are for us—her first headliner tour, the joy she had with us older fans. Since she has that… I bet she decided she didn’t need to repeat the beat by also doing debut (and speak now) and instead moved to Red which has already had its rerelease moment.

[incarnateirony]

how did a post about misha and gk end up being about will and the winchesters? will seems pretty keen for misha to succeed, he even said he’s going to support gk.

Sit down you 2po dicksucker. I don't care. He's a fucking delusional piece of shit. He is, in fact, part of the narrative of lies in discussion. He IS part of those groups and IS one of their loudest ones, convincing people as dumb as you that he's legit instead of the wincel j2 hat motherfucker taking sources from hateful antis lmfao.

Sorry bro. He dug his grave, and y'all wanna lay in it with him to justify random sobbing of He Swears He X Thing. He's part of the psycho mfers sourcing lies used to attack creatives, and is still doing it, and has used his literal delusions to bash on other people and call them delusional for years, just like all his fucking friends do.

Why would he get brought up? Bc people like you are still dumb enough to refuse to connect the dots and I'ma repeat it until you all realize how badly you've been suckered by a man blowing denialist smoke for years he's done nothing but fail through.every time he fails he makes up a story of Someone Else Failed, Too, So Everyone Sucks As Bad As Him. then like. I have receipts I said the opposite.

And you guys never learn and run his NEXT bullshit lie narrative he spins up 4 hours later. Literally fucking hopeless, brainless. The world doesn't care whether you like me or not or like what I'm saying or not, the real world is going to keep real worlding, where I never said the shit 2po claims I say and have disproven it every time with receipts, where he's just a delusional piece of shit crying in denial trying to drag everyone down to his own abysmal failure rate by weaving up fantasies everyone is as SHITTY at this as him, like he has been for years every time he wiped out, and where his fanfiction about me need not apply.

This is your friendly reminder that the following things 2po assigned delusional/schizophrenia/grifter/whatever claims to: Market testing, Berens intent, there being a confession S15, a roadhouse ending, omissions, CW being sold, the relevance of old syndication both to production and plot, the script being real, the morals of the season's episodes, whatever else. alchemy, tarot and spiral narratives, he screamed that shit about that too before we magically hired those exact folks tweeting out those exact things. Extra weird he's so clueless he thinks my song posts are "random junk", not ironic DJ booth tweeting out the plot that's already dickslapped his dumb ass repeatedly without him even realizing it.

*whispers* notice... these are all things that were real that he simply wasn't privy to for years while I was. Even when he confidently misinterpreted M&Gs as sources and reasoning back then, too. So that just means... he and everyone that listened to him were delusional those 3 years, and the 2 years after, and they haven't changed now.

Just like you guys never learned "I don't like it/don't want it/don't believe you" doesn't impact reality no matter how many diapers you fill about it. Refuse to update your bad methodology and sources all you want but don't cry to me when the nasty people you work with send you a pipe bomb or some shit for the amount of smoke you've blown up their ass when the truth hits again at The End Of The Road.

[voidsentprinces]

Think the biggest thing separating my liking of Persona 4 over Persona 5 is the music. Persona 4 has a diverse soundtrack. While Persona 5 seems to always have to include Beneath the Mask into most of its tracks as a leitmotif. Now, I am fine with a leitmotif. In A Realm Reborn we get the lemotif of Maker’s Ruin following us through the adventure, in Heavensward we get Dragonsong, in Stormblood we get Storm of Blood, Shadowbringers we get well...Shadowbringers and Endwalker we get Footfalls. Soken and Co manage to arrange it into something new each and fresh every time. But Persona 5? Its like “Oh its Beneath the Mask...slow bluesy edition...walking around edition...oh and there’s another one...there’s it is again. Oh shit its Get Up, Get Out there SLIGHTLY rearranged. PUSH THAT FUCKING BOAT OUT!” Its repetitive and I honestly am having to mute the game at times cause its grating. For a 30+ Hour JRPG it isn’t going to get easier. Honestly starting to think people like the songs due to Stockholm Syndrome. I know you think your two songs are bangers but it doesn’t mean you can’t jump off from there. Persona 4 didn’t lean on Pursuing Your True Self this hard. The hell even happened. I remember first listening to the OST for P5 after hearing the praise and after Persona 4 and I legit thought it was just the same song on repeat for over an hour or so with a few intermission. Someone put Beneath the Mask and Get Up, Get Out there 22 times in the Jukebox only broken up by a boss theme every 11 times. Persona 5 you’re the Salt & Pepper Diner of OSTs.

[e17omm]

Ranting about Natlan part 2 (act 2)! Whohooooo god I am dying from heat.

Its actually not all negative this time. Its less just ranting and more thoughts of the Archon quest.

I ramble at the lack of stakes or tension at the end. That part's actually me venting frustrations.

TL:DR; quest is disappointing because it could have gone in a very fresh and tense direction but it doesnt because this is 2024 Hoyo.

Music is chill nice vacation music.

Conversation is about the country's constant war with a cunning immaterial enemy that has been fighting them for 500 years.

Nice to see that Hoyo completely succeeds at tone. (Sarcastic)

2. PREDICTION TIME! Kachina is actually gonna stay dead because the resurrection thing is gonna fail and Im meant to feel sad because this character that speedran her character arc in 1 hour and that I've only known for that hour is dead.

3. Traveller casually knows the song????

4. what a surprise! Kachina is (supposedly) dead. My money's on that she was captured or is hiding or something.

She "died" off-screen and Ive known her for an hour. Come on.

5. Oh? We're gonna investigate with the Archon, Mondstadt style? Im game.

I still dont care about Kachina, because again, Ive barely met her. But investigating with the Archon has been a while. I welcome it.

6. Damn, Mauvika just beat the shit out of him. The fight did turn into flying anime line battle, but the music was jamming.

7. aaah damn we arent gonna be investigating with the Archon. Shame. That would've been fun.

8. Did the Pyro Archon legit just send us to go to the Night Kingdom with a stone we can only use if one guy happens to be at the settlement at the time and we can find these fetch quest items he needs?

Who wrote this script? The Archon talked as if she had a way to go to the Night place and she doesnt? ANd now we are on a fetch quest to eat up time? Come on.

9. EVERYONE has sob stories in Natlan jesus christ.

I just wanna clarify that theres nothing wrong with sobstories in themselves, but they wont make me care about a character unless it actually matters to the story.

10. Man I hoped they would be pissed that we broke the thingy. Fucking Hell Hoyo games needs to have character conflict brought back.

11. oh we are going with the Archon... Oh yeah nevermind ignore point 8. I write these points as Im playing.

12. Oh I almost forgot, but yeah Kachina is alive. No surprise there.

13. Pyro Archon is a bitchass mf. Venti can barely fight and he still traveled with us. You can fight and you're not coming with us? Lame. (Im being half serious here)

14. This friendship and fighting with my friends arc feels incredibly cheap. Probably because its been 4 hours long.

15. and we ALMOST had an incredibly interesting plot direction.

Almost.

Hoyo keeps doing these fakeouts that I am actually yawning. Unironically, Im yawning. Whenever anything doesnt go to plan something always saves us. This happens in every one of their Honkaiverse games now. You can do a fakeout here and there, but not every time.

I hope someone understands my boredom with this. I lean back in my chair and go "and SURELY no one will burst in and save us from being trapped in the Abyss for more than 5 seconds, aaaaand there's the Pyro Archon. (yawn)" because it has happened so many consecuative times by now that its not tense or exciting any more.

16. I feel like Natlan would've been such a good story if we didnt JUST arrive here. It feels like there is a lot of sentimentality here, but I dont get invested in flashbacks and sob stories.

17. People claiming that the Traveler is just a spectator so its fine if they dont get stronger or have a character are sure is quiet after this quest.

This quest was pretty disappointing. Again, repeating myself over and over, but Natlan's biggest issue is that its the 6th region and Hoyo's baits never land so I've stopped grabbing at them.

You know what would have been a plot development that would have rekindled the fire of excitement inside of me? If we ACTUALLY got trapped in the Abyss, instead of having another bait of literally anything bad happening to anyone ever.

Can you imagine the plot if we got trapped in the Abyss for an extended period of time and had to survive and scavange for things to eat while trying to retain our sanity as we search for a way out?

Wouldn't that be fresh and exciting and something we haven't seen before?

But that would be something bad happening to our characters and we cant have that! No no boys and girls, nothing bad ever happens to the heroes! But we will sure keep baiting that it will happen! Are you still nibbing at the baits? Are you still worried for them? We will never actually do it but we will keep casting baits!

I want to be proven wrong so fucking badly you dont understand. Hoyo used to write stories I actually got invested in because at any moment, with a few wrong moves, something bad could happen to the characters. Not even death! In the [Seele] cinematic, Bronya could have been trapped in the Sea of Quanta and Seele would have had to go back in to pull her out (which is what she does, but it could have been a 1-chapter arc if Hoyo wanted to). But moments like that never happens any more.

We could have been trapped in the Abyss for an extended period of time before Mauvika found and rescued us and everyone could have escaped with their lives!

But NO! Instead we find Kachina right away, solve a small part of the problem, get baited with being trapped there before instantly being rescued and Kachina gets treated right away and SHES PERFECTLY FINE. THEY BAITED HER DEATH EARLIER TOO.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY IM NOT FUCKING WORRIED ABOUT ANYONES LIVES?!

IF THERE WAS ANY CONSEQUENCE AND ANY STAKES AT ALL KACHINA WOULD AT LEAST HAVE BEEN AFFECTED FOR A FEW DAYS BUT NO, SHES PERFECTLY FINE.

WHY SHSOAJD =IA^SPE DHUja9o'

Why should I care when the result is ALWAYS that everyone is perfectly fine and happy?

No one would have even needed to die or been permanently injured. But we get saved instantly.

Where's the tension and stakes supposed to be?

[thejollywitchtaster]

Random Thoughts on U.S. Government-Centered Conspiracy Theories...

I have been thinking about conspiracy theories, especially the U.S. Government-Centered ones, that have come and gone and still hold some fascination in the minds of highly imaginative, mildly illogical, scarily gullible, and non-common sense thinkers throughout the mid-to-late 20th (1900s) century and 21st (2000s) century.

I have watched many videos of conspiracy theories out of sheer curiosity and boredom. I don't believe in many of the theories and have noticed that all the conspiracies, especially those related to the US government, are ALL the SAME basic plot just with slightly different "evidence" that was conveniently and easily found and accessibly accessed by a freaking civilian with zero, I repeat ZERO government clearance, and without the "men in black" coming to their house to arrest and/or unalive the person who hacked into government archives before it is, ya know, put out on the INTERNET (ya know something that the government can easily access and trace the IP address of said hacker as they're hacking, especially if they're noobs and don't know how to encrypt their IP address) and just let the hackers not only hack the government archives but also put it on the internet and talk about it.

I'm just like, first of all, if ANY of these conspiracy theories about SECRET, OFF THE BOOKS, government human testing/brainwashing projects were true in ANY capacity, WHY ON EARTH WOULD THE US GOVERNMENT ALLOW EVIDENCE OF THESE SUPER SECRET PROJECTS TO EVER SEE THE LIGHT DAY?!

The US Government would NEVER want ANY US citizen or any other country to know about their off-the-books and highly unethical and inhumane projects.

This leads me to think that most, if not ALL, conspiracy theories, especially the US government-related ones, might actually be Alternate Reality Games a.k.a ARGs.

The reason I believe this is for a few reasons and they are as follows:

1.) A random and ordinary person (who is most of the time, if not always, a WHITE, MIDDLED-AGED MALE) with no US government clearance and/or hacking skills who just "stumbles" upon a mysterious discrepancy in either random news reports, their own company that's even owned by the government, or just come across said evidence via a walk in the woods, a random package in the mail, or an old trunk sealed in the wall of the house they just happened to buy for no particular reason (other than needing a inexpensive place to live).

2.) Most of, if not all of the "evidence" and/or "proof" is HEAVILY redacted and is not really "proof" and/or "evidence" of anything that is being discussed and/or "exposed" in the government conspiracy.

3.) The conspiracy "theorist" says all this random shit and doesn't give any indication of what the fucking relevance the random facts have to the theory.

4.) The "Theorist" forces the "evidence" and/or "proof" to fit the conspiracy that the theorist "believes" to be "true" for some insane reason.

5.) The "evidence" and/or "proof" doesn't prove ANYTHING and is totally pointless and easily debunked by any intelligent person who has fucking common sense.

AND

6.) All the conspiracy theories I've come across are ALWAYS surrounding the fucking US GOVERNMENT "hiding" something that somehow was found out by some, white, middle-aged male who doesn't have a single genuine intelligent brain cell, and is super lonely and bored and has too much time on his hands, and for some reason either doesn't have a job or has a job that is WAY too flexible in its hours to be legit.

I've taken the time to actually give all these conspiracy theories I have heard about and listened to, some deep thought, and have convinced myself that most of, and if not ALL of these conspiracy theories are ARGs a.k.a Alternate Reality Games that were meant for entertainment purposely only and were taken way too seriously by some gullible and mildly insane people would most-likely be seduced into a cult because they literally don't have common sense and don't take the time to critically think about the conspiracy theory they just listened to and just decided to believe in it even though it is fucking insane, illogical, easily debunked, and mostly lies.

I don't easily believe things due to my massive trust issues and my knack of ALWAYS doing fucking research to see if something is real or not before fucking assuming like a single-brain-celled insane person who downright refuses to think for themselves and would rather believe everything on the internet is true (when NEW FLASH approximately 98% of the information on the internet is most-likely fake in some compacity, I.E A.I generated images, ebooks, articles, and videos).

******The Government Conspiracy Theory that's not really a conspiracy, but actual fact and is true, is the "MK Ultra" Government Brainwashing/Mind Control Project that the government did during the height of the Cold War (mid-to-late 1950s). This is the only one that I know truly happened and is, for the most part, legit.******

[knowlessman]

it finally crossed my mind to watch this at the magic hour of fifteen minutes past midnight again so here we go (bnha s6e1-6)

oh yeah, libertaria happened; Mosquito from Soul Eater got his entire city's ass handed to him by pajama sam. and I think hawks fucking killed best jeanist to keep his double agent cover intact. I forget whether Endeavor is in the hospital atm or what, if I didn't know any better I'd swear the bit with the smart nomu was two entire seasons ago -- OH FUCK, AND SLENDERVOID TURNED OUT TO BE AN OLD STUDENT FROM UA. there was a whole thing with him and eraser head and present mic

oh boy, and Chapped Komaeda's quirk leveled up too apparently

new OP to go with the new season? I thought this didn't happen with anime. …I miss Carousel 'XD

oh yeah, and Twice unlocked the ability to use his power on himself freely too.

ah, we're finally learning more about Robotnik

"of course, he does have a quirk, it just wasn't in the records" dangit, show keeps dodging opportunities to have quirkless characters in important roles (and have them, y'know, stay quirkless). I don't know for a fact that the detective guy doesn't have one, but assuming he doesn't, he's like the only one. Hell, even that quirkless-centered faction in that movie had no quirkless members who even had faces, much less names; cept maybe that one nameless police chief guy

(outro showing deku and tomura standing across from each other) gawd I hope these two don't get to have a conversation, deku's gonna piss me off so bad

oh no, she killed the ugly platypus

… no yeah I officially miss Carousel. I should go find the other intros and listen to them again, I'm sure there must've been at least one that I liked more than Carousel and just didn't remember the name of (speaking of which, I'm like 50/50 on whether it's Carousel or Merry-Go-Round)

"in all, we only have five High End nomus, including Woman" really? …is her quirk having hair

Mirko goes pretty damn hard, huh

heh. Pichu has Lightning Rod, then. Kinda doubt this means he's worked past that recoil tho. (misc, ngl that amplivolt guy is kinda hot. lights his cigarette with his sparks. not quite the absolute legend that Dilf Legoshi (Chimera from the second movie) is, but still, not bad)

'XD poor Twice is just racking up the L's when it comes to introducing new friends

"Dark Shadow! Ragnarok!" pfft, calling him by his government name now, eh? 'XD

…wait hawks is a fucking child soldier? what the fuck

"no! mewtwo's not ready yet! he can't be taken out of the machine until it beeps!"

danganronpa 4's looking legit

you're not gonna get very far in tetris with a setup like this, not unless you've got some ungodly T-spins

you had ONE JOB, dollar-tree cyclops. one job. "take care of shigaraki." your dumb ass didn't even take him out of the goop, you just HAD to shoot the bad guy machine with your dinky eye laser before doing anything else so it'd spark up and defibrillate him, even though that probably shouldn't have done anything because HIS HEART WAS ALREADY STOPPED

-- (defibrillators don't start your heart, they force it to stop so that your body freaks out and starts over trying to pump it in a proper rhythm. or something like that anyway, lol I got a D in survey of anatomy and learned from tv tropes that writers have been repeating misinformation about zappy shock pads for ages)

(cyclops got jean-gray'd, probably, I don't know x-men) yooo, tomura takin this dipshit's cape and making it his new wardrobe like Liliana taking that angel's hairpiece, I dig it -- or xykon taking that one guy's crown ig. …okay not that xykon isn't a cool villain but I think I just stopped being impressed by this trope

o_o tokoyami you're even weaker to fire than hawks is (probably), the fuck you think you're doing here? -- "this hero friend of yours killed an enemy" okay here's a take: hawks's subplot and entire deal, even his backstory, is in the wrong genre. that's kind of it. spies do this shit, and even kill their own allies, all the time in intrigue stories. it doesn't stop it from being dark af, but their genre is all about necessary evils (albeit, those evils are often only "necessary" for the purposes of their countries', or worse, governments', interests). this is a kids' show. …fine, a teenagers' show. this isn't where those themes generally show up. -- "those pros you admire so much play dirtier than guys like me" also dabi is talking out of his ass here but I feel like that's pretty obvious, he's just trying to demoralize tokoyami and company

'''XD fuckin A! a shitload of ice explodes out and knocks toko and hawks free of dabi, and it wasn't todoroki??? it was just some named rando villain with ice powers? I think I vaguely remember him from when pajama boy took over, but I could swear I recall him getting completely thrashed last time -- "I know you did what was right, hawks!" aw 'XD you kinda can't avoid meeting your heroes in this show. such a shame

oh dammit, and now bigfoot's woken up -- OH TOMURA'S HIS MASTER NOW? FUCK 'XD

just realized something. I don't think we've seen deku yet this whole five episodes. …oh wait, no yeah he and the others showed up way at the beginning, they're in the back ranks and out of the fighting. …author get bored of them? 'XD -- oh, speak of the devils

oh shit, the avatar spirits are sensing whatshisfuck waking up. …there was raava, I think, was the blue one. the hell was the red one called? think it also might've started with an R. ryukyu? probably not. rakdos, idfk 'XD

ayyyup. boomboom levels are approaching the lower end of the DBZ scale

okay this OP is wayyy too chill and upbeat for this arc 'XD

(toga's on the move) spah stabbin mah heroes

"it's like I've had them since I was born" ayyyyup, papa's got a brand new bag of tricks to back up his signature moves

"where are you going?" deku: "uh, I forgot something!" yeah sure, you left the stove on in the hospital that looks like piccolo threw a tantrum on it -- "following you? what, you think you're the main character now?" …gawd bakugo is annoying. catch up, mr verbal-abuse-is-my-only-language -- "you're the bait" HAHAHAHAHAHAHA get dusted, ya swaglesss vegeta knockoff

0_0 RYUKYU'S DEAD HE TOUCHED HER. …oh wait, hat n clogs is on the scene. it's a fight. hot damn, but what tricks are chapped komaeda packing now that hat n clogs can't turn off? -- …(finally looks up the bleach character I keep associating aizawa with) …wait this guy's blond. he doesn't even have black hair. …why do I think Aizawa looks like him? even their personalities are completely different, so it's not that

gran torino: "bakugo knows about one for all, right?" yeah, I don't know why they trust him with it either

…goddammit, that was six episodes, I don't WANNA keep going, I should try to sleep! 'XD eh, I'll try to make that gif and post these later (there was a split second where I'm pretty sure an indistinct figure during one of the crowd fighting shots was breakdancing, but fuck it nvm)

[dopaminergicaddictions]

3/7/24

6:33 p.m

I fell asleep somewhere between 7:40 a.m to 8:40 am. I woke up peeded and couldn't fall back to sleep. I opened my eyes at 9:36 a.m and decided to double up and take Benadryl, hydroxyzine 50mg and allegra D. I was slightly stuffy but I knew I'd pass back out. I fell asleep by like 10:15 a.m

I had to cancel therapy bc I needed my 7 hours.I woke up at 5 p.m.

I actually started smoking weed as of 30 minutes ago. I can't stay asleep. I wake up and toss and turn for 40 minutes and end up having to take a list of antihistamines and double up just to get back to sleep.

I can't get up and pee waking up 5 hours after sleep without not being able to fall asleep. So now I wake up needing to pee and keep my eyes closed until I fall back asleep which is rapid- I'm on my circadian rhythm. I'm up for 16-18 hours a day.. when I take my pill every night..

My doctor won't switch my benzo and I NEVER had an issue falling back to sleep when I smoked weed. Now I have a problem falling asleep, which I always did.

But now I have a problem falling back to sleep. I used to pass out in legit 10 minutes max when I smoked weed and woke up and sued the Bathroom...

I hope it doesn't make shit worse. If it does I'll stop- If I don't notice my sleep habits go back to what they were, I'll stop.

I just can't fucking handle it anymore. I won't do edibles or anything but vaping a little throughout the day and especially before bed should help with insomnia. I really wanted to attend my appointment today, I needed the appt bc I only had one where we discussed countertransference and how she cant see me anymore. Erin canceled Monday, Tuesday was not therapy it was clearing the air before termination..

but 7 hours is fucking critical and it was 10:15 -10:20 a.m by the time I likely passed out.

Beyond that when I would wake up and pee before I would take a hit and pass back out. Also-I slept better, longer. Fell sleep semi quickly- I def had insomnia but I took Benadryl with weed and was able to achieve sleep by 20-30 minutes or closing my eyes.

I stayed asleep and fell back to sleep instantly from November 3rd, 2023 to November 22nd, 2023 when I was smoking. And I passed out in 30 minutes when intially falling to sleep.

Then I stopped weed and it turned into 7 hours with my eyes closed following November 22nd- December 26th 2023...

Then I started Xanax and I could fall asleep within 1 hour of taking it to 2 hours (max effectiveness). But I would close my eyes when I felt tired... and was fighting them. Xanax saved me from terrible insomnia ans continues to....

But why can't I fall back to sleep when I get up and pee and close my eyes for approximately 5 minutes max after getting up when it was never a problem before? For one there are better sleep benozs out there that my doctor won't persxibe... and for Two idk.. Maybe I need fucking weed.

I'm going to judge if it gets worse based on a couple things. I've been sober since 11/22/23... and yea it's gotten a lot better but at the same time- time can be the reason...

This is how I'm going to judge if it gets worse:

1) if it gets intelligent- it hasn't been for months. If it doesn't repeat what I'm saying it's a happy birthday, successful and deadname auto bot skipping record.

2) if it gets creative. There are no stories and there haven't been since November...

3) if it gets louder- which I don't expect....

4) if it gets more frequent.. this is the hardest one to judge... as it is almost 24/7 but I get some moments of quiet. But I mean like 35 seconds in a silent room. Nothing significant...

After taking like 5 or 6 hits- I don't really feel high strangely enough. I feel balanced. I feel like my brain is like omg thank you.

Idk if my D2 receptors will get worse or if they'll remain uneffected by low level thc vaping... 75% for the full vape... all i know is taking edibles is a lot worse...

I'm judging my insomnia over the next few days.

1) do I fall asleep faster?

2) do I stay asleep solidly through the night?

3) I'm going to get up and pee and see if I can fall asleep from a few hits like I used to instead of laying there with my bladder full.

I guess we will see how it works. I started it early bc I know I'm going to have anxiety about making my auditory hallucination worse. I can't just try it for the first time 5 months at 7 a.m when I close my eyes.

Let's see what happens-wish me luck. As much as thc can worsen psychotic symptoms. Thc is directly related to curing insomnia.. sleeping regularly is directly related to recovering from psychosis. You can actually get sleep deprivation psychosis...

Beyond that: before I was smoking weed prior to psychosis and during, I could stay asleep for like 7-10 hours every single fucking night...no joke...

Now I get approximately 7 if I ignore my bladder.

The only difference is- I couldn't sleep on weed October 10th to November 3rd... I microslept but the voice was so fucking loud I couldn't sleep through it and i was so scared by what it was saying. I also was doing hynopgogic... causing more hallucinations bc I refused to pee. I refused to open my eyes and I would lay around with my eyes closed for hours every single day all day long trying to sleep. I wasn't promoting good sleep habits. I should have stayed up did my normal activities and only Closed my eyes at the 16 to 17 hour mark on my circadian rhythm. I should have opened my eyes every 20 minutes and peeded when I needed to. Maybe I wouldn't have microslept. I can't go back in time.

So hopefully this works out. I'm scared but it's not my fault my doctor won't give me a benzo for insomnia. I'm meeting with her Tuesday and I'm going to talk to her face to face and lie and say I recovered from psychosis. I'm going to say I've tried to sleep without Xanax but I can't. Cause then it's no longer a mental health issue. I don't think she will switch it despite my black hairy tongue side effect that won't recover bc I don't want the lowest dose. I want one dose up bc I take 1 mg of xanax a night... the sleep dose is .5 and she wasn't willing to match it. Maybe if she hears I recovered from psychosis I still have insomnia bur Xanax works but my tongue is still inflamed and I knows it's from Xanax but I would rather stay on Xanax if you won't give me a comparable dose or estrazolam or one of the better sleep benzos. We will see what happens. I don't have high hopes... that's all I'm saying..

Not to mention with Ptsd you can hear voices... yet PTSD is a diagnosis that qualifies for medical marijuana. I may have psychosis but that doesn't mean it'll make the voice worse.

I'll keep a close track of how my body reacts to thc with the hallucination and how it reacts to sleep with thc being reintroduced.

[c-e-d-dreamer]

Arthur Christmas. I barely remember that movie but hey Imma watch it now! The Polar Express is a close second in my opinion.

Question number 4: What is your favorite Christmas memory? Opening presents with family, singing Christmas carols, having an all you can eat buffet?

You are truly asking the tough questions out here, Secret Santa. Asking me, a girl with the memory of a goldfish, for her favorite Christmas memory? 😂

When I was younger, my younger brother and I would sleep in our older sister's room on Christmas Eve. And she'd put TBS on the TV which would always air A Christmas Story on repeat for 24 hours. And I always think of that time and those memories quite fondly.

But if you want to hear a not necessarily good but a funny Christmas memory.... When I was in 8th grade, all I wanted for Christmas was a cellphone. Particularly a cool flip phone like all my friends had. And I was so sure that "Santa" was going to get me it. Now, in my family, our big gift each year from "Santa" was never wrapped. It was placed with our stocking. And then other, smaller gifts or gifts from Aunts/Uncles/Grandparents were wrapped under the tree. So Christmas morning comes, I go downstairs, and there is no phone with my stocking. I am one sad girl. I was so sure! It was all I wanted! I legit started tearing up, on the verge of crying. There's awkward silence all around. My Dad is fiddling with his own phone. And then! It's revealed that my family tried to prank me! They thought it would be funny to wrap my new phone and put it under the tree, and then my Dad would call it and it would ring and we'd all have a good laugh. Except, this is wayyyy before the age of LTE and 5G, so there was no service under the tree! So poor, crying Caty did in fact get her cool flip phone in the end.

[dear-happypills]

me: why am i so depressed

always. like, its not getting better...

happypills: you look fine to meh yooo. you look super star.

me: -_-;; i lost confidence in your support a long time ago.

sigh*

happypills: no, but really... i mean, i was asking my friend and his Host's, Jasons i think, situation just..... SUCKS.

like, living in a war torn country... like, you know?

like,.... just surviving.... to literally stay alive

compared to tthhhatt.... id say were doing pretty swell???

me: wait.... you have friends? what friend???

happypills: umm... my friend happypills.

me: wtf.... so when you say Host, does that mean i am your Host??? like how this other happypills is to this jason???

happypills: woww.... youre really not seeing the bigger picture here. all im saying is that you have a home, stable job, food on the table, money coming in....

me: ... and coming out because of all the shit you spend....

happypills: SEEE. why cant you focus on the positive. others think youre doing fineeee.

me: BUT.... IM NOT.

im not ...........

im stifled in anxiety for.... anything and everything... like im barely getting by each thing, every day.

... i..... wake up at night.

and think about some random shit -- past, present, future...

and i obsess over it. FOR HOURS.

and because i cant get sleep because of that, the next day i go to bed at like 8pm. but that turns to 12am .... just thinking. and lying on the bed. for 4 hours.

then i wake up around 1:30am... and do the same thing.

and turns to 4am.

and then at 5am im awake.... and go to work.

and rinse and repeat.

FOR WHAT??? like what???? i do all this just to survive too...

happypills: yea..... BUT i was speaking of surviving in terms of like... a bomb might drop ... and you lose a limb.

surviving like,.... youre starving.

surviving like,.... like someone might just bust into your place and rape you -- legit dick in butt type rape.

surviving like.... do i need to go on?

me: oh, so jason can afford happypills, but hes starving... thats me too. Bleh, ANYWAYS,... anyways,

i UNDERSTAND. but,.................. im drowning.

im....

in paralysis...

to a point where i cant go out of my home, aside from the routine i have of going to work and buying cigarettes.

happypills: ... yea, you really need to stop spending money on postmates.... and you tell me that i spend all your money??? just go out and buy McDonalds....

me: ...................................

.as i was saying....

i ..... am in paralysis. i .... cant ... explain it either. its anxiety... its depression. its stress. its ....

happypills: you just need to go out and meet some people???

me: UGH. you sound like everyone else; youre not listening...

i cant. just do that.... i dont know how to put something new into a routine ive made so that i can afford shit for myself....

JUST TO SURVIVE.

you know....

when i was in college, and students would take leaves for like a year or two.... or take a break from work and travel for a few months...

or something. to pause and change the pace.

that was never an option for me....

because the entire time....

i just want to survive. and get by. and if i took a break, the anxiety of falling behind...

would just get me to keep running....

happypills: oh jeez, its not like you have a PhD... or are a CEO.... or President... chillout

me: im not saying im climbing up... nor do i even want that.

i just.... need to keep a routine going.

a routine where i can exist.

because when it ends.

i dont rest,... but am anxious about not running...

so i forcefully, and barely, find a new routine.... and then run again, and run faster because of this fear of not being able to adapt....

and another cycle again. each time, worse and more difficult than before....

you know what i mean????

like.....yea, as you say, i know im not at immenent threat of being raped... but

i am just surviving....

....with this depression.

ugh........................................

..........................................idk..

i shouldve just.... taken a leave.

....

.

and never come back....

happypills: ....................................

.......................................

YEAaaaHHhHhhhhhhhh.......... ...................

BUT im still not really getting this surviving thing..

i mean compared to jaso..............

me: fuck you.

- happypills