#like probably a solid 4 years of no other fandom being able to come close

[cementcornfield]

huh. not super sure how i feel about this :')

[canmom]

Animation Night 127: Project Itoh

Hi friends!

It’s Thursday - my last Thursday in America for the foreseeable future, in fact. On Monday I’ll be making a bizarre journey back to the UK via the ‘extremely direct’ route of Norway and Latvia, because it turns out that’s the cheapest way to get across the Atlantic. So that’s gonna be quite an adventure. I’m going to write some kind of post about things I’ve seen in America but probably when I get back for the sake of enjoying what time I’ve got left here...

Anyway, on to movies!

Tonight we’re going to be checking out a curious little sort-of trilogy of movies by different studies and directors from 2015, celebrating the works of the short-lived but influential science fiction author Satoshi Itō, aka Project Itoh.

Here’s a picture of Itoh hanging out with his close friend Hideo Kojima at a book launch (via Metal Gear Trivia)

So who’s this Project Itoh guy? Born 1974 in Tokyo, there’s not a lot of biographical details about Itō’s early life, save that he went to Musashino Art University and worked as a web designer until the publication of his first novel, Genocidal Organ, in 2007.

What we do know is that he loved Metal Gear. Like, a lot. Itō got into Kojima’s games from the very start, and indeed most information about his life comes from Kojima’s account, alongside the blog where he published Snatcher and Metal Gear fanfic. The pair met at the 1998 Tokyo Game Show, at which Kojima was immediately struck by Itō’s devotion to his works, describing Itō as the one person who truly understand what he was writing about - an experience which ‘saved’ Kojima.

The two became close friends - and three years later, when Itō went into hospital with cancer in 2001, Kojima rushed to his bedside, and while there, showed him the first footage of MGS2: Sons of Liberty. Itō responded by promising he would not die until Kojima finished MGS2.

The experience of being hospitalised seems to have been very formative for Itō’s worldview. Youtuber The Canipa Project translates a blog post in which Itō talks about the experience of having his body sustained by scientific means only recently invented, making him a cyborg.

This time, Itō was able to keep his promise; when MGS2 came out, Itō wrote extensive analysis and exegesis of the game’s philosophical themes, getting a lot of attention within the fandom.

As the 2000s went on, it seems he judged it time to spread his wings and try releasing his own original stories under the pen name Project Itoh. The first, Genocidal Organ, was adapted from a fanfic he wrote about Snatcher into an original story. He submitted it to a novel writing competition in 2006, and while it didn’t win, he found a publisher in 2007; the novel became a hit, and so impressed Kojima that he asked Itō to take on the daunting task of writing a novelisation of Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots.

Itō apparently succeeded handily at the novelisation, and off these two successes, seemed set for a great writing career. His next novel, Harmony, dropped in 2008, dives straight into the themes of medical control; a dystopia in a post-nuclear war world where humans in the aftermath managed to cure cancer and most other diseases, only to institute a program of social control in an attempt to complete their utopia by eliminating mental illness as well. A story that’s clearly cutting pretty close to the bone from Itoh’s own experiences, since he was spending the 2000s dealing with recurrent cancer that took him back to hospital over and over.

And, indeed, the inevitable came in 2009, at which point Itō had just begun on his third novel Empire of Corpses. His cancer returned in force and he returned to hospital; once again Kojima went to his bedside and broke NDA to tell Itoh in detail about his next game, Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker - that’s the odd PSP one featuring the Sandinistas. And once again, Itoh promised to live until Kojima finished the game, and write the novelisation of MGS3 and Peace Walker. But this time, it was a promise he could not keep; Itoh died at the age of 34.

In the wake of his death, a devastated Kojima dedicated Peace Walker to him (and later revealed he had planned to name as a successor following MGS5), and his friend Toe Enjoe took on the task of finishing Empire of Corpses. Once again, I’ll turn to Canipa Effect’s translation of some of the words Itō wrote three months before his death:

Humans dwell in others as a story. People can continue to live within someone else as a narrative. Then, by being part of the variety of spoken words, they become part of the fiction that can shape humanity.

(Words that resonate too strongly with the death of my friend Fall earlier this year.)

So far, a tragic story - but in some sense one with a slightly hopeful touch, in that rather than dying of cancer in 2001, Itō was able to enjoy eight more years of life and write several novels. But what has it got to do with animation?

Enter Noitamina (the word animation backwards), the late-night anime programming block run at the time by Koji Yamamoto as a means to get experimental, creative animation - such as Masaaki Yuasa’s adaptation of The Tatami Galaxy or Kenji Nakemura’s BakeNeko and Mononoke  - out to a wider audience. Yamamoto departed the block in 2015, but in its heyday it was home to a number of radically creative works; you can read more about it over here on sakugablog in a recent post on the context behind The Tatami Galaxy.

So, in 2015, Noitamina announced it would fund three movie-length adaptations of Itoh’s three novels, each by a different studio and director. For all three movies, the character designer would be illustrator redjuice of the ‘band’ Supercell, a somewhat odd musical project consisting of just one musician and ten illustrators and designers who produce materials around the music.

Genocidal Organ would go to the hands of Shūkō Murase, at Studio Manglobe, a unique studio renowned for original works like Shinichirō Watanabe’s Samurai Champloo, Ergo Proxy, and Michiko & Hatchin (the latter of which I covered back on Animation Night 36). Murase seems like a natural choice for a highly philosophical cyberpunk story, given Ergo Proxy... but a spanner was thrown in the works when Manglobe went bankrupt; Genocidal Organ would eventually be saved by the resurrected Manglobe in the form of Geno Studio, but for this reason, it missed the planned simultaneous release of the three movies.

The story concerns a world in which a series of social breakdowns and genocides take place in a short period of time, all seemingly associated with an American named John Paul - who, when tracked down, claims to have discovered a ‘genocidal organ’ which can be activated to incite humans to acts of genocide. Without giving away too many spoilers, it’s basically about the current American-dominated geopolitical order.

On the animation side, the stars of the show would be Bahi JD, the Austrian from the earliest wave of sakuga fandom who became one of the first international ‘webgen’ animators to find a career in Japan... and Shūkō Murase himself, who animated several cuts as well as directing the film. As such, even a quick look at sakugabooru shows a lot of subtle, well-observed movement; I’m looking forward to seeing it fit together.

Harmony - the post-cancer dystopian one - went to Michael Arias at studio 4°C, of Tekkonkinkreet fame (see Animation Night 52 for Tekkonkinkreet, and Animation Night 74 for a more detailed history of 4°C), alongside veteran animator and director Takashi Nakamura who you may remember from the Chicken Man and Red Neck sequence of Robot Carnival. It comes at a point where 4°C had found a lot of comfort with their use of CG, two years before Mutafukaz (Animation Night 105), and even if the incredible background artists of Tekkonkinkreet may not be on this one, I imagine it will look pretty lavish as 4C stuff always does.

Then comes The Empire of Corpses. This one goes to Wit Studio (Animation Night 101), directed by Ryōtarō Makihara - also no stranger to scifi, with his main previous work being Hal, the story about a robot designed to play the role of a deceased partner. Unlike Itō’s other works, which are near-future science fiction, this one is more of a steampunk piece, taking place in an alternate 19th century in which mass produced Frankenstein’s monsters have become the industrial base of society; its characters bounce around the globe unearthing a conspiracy. It sounds kind of wild, honestly, with not just Frankenstein and Babbage but even frigging Sherlock Homes running around; Japanese spins on British characters like this are always kind of fascinating. (Also... there is some tragic irony about a story revolving around reanimated corpses being completed by Itō’s friend after his death.)

So, that’s the plan for tonight: we’re going to be watching all three Project Itoh movies, in the order that Itoh wrote them! I think there’s gonna be some great stuff in here, and I hope I’ve given you reasons to be excited too~

so, if you’d like to check these out, please make your way down to  twitch.tv/canmom  - we’ll be starting the program in about 20-30 minutes once people are in there!

[ecoamerica]

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

[batsandbugs]

The Great IKEA Game

Chapter 4: The Three Stooges 

AN: At least it hasn’t been two months again 😅. Let’s check in with the other batboys and see how they’re handling Damian and Marinette’s chaos. 

Chapter 1 Chapter 2  Chapter 3

Tim wondered when his day took a solid dive off the cliffs of normal and into the waters of weird.

It probably started when Dick dragged them out of bed at eight in the morning – on a Saturday – piled them into the car, and drove them an hour and a half out of the city to an IKEA. If they had actually been there to shop they would have either burned the store down or killed one another. 

Not that those things were off the table yet. 

Tim had work, actual work, that he could be doing. But no, instead he was playing a demented game of hide-and-go-seek, which was careening into an all-out war. The destroyed shelving units, shopping carts, and forklift were unmistakable evidence of that.

How had the demon spawn accomplished this in less than a minute?

Bruce would kill them, once he came back from off-world.

That is if Alfred didn’t get to them first.

“Uh, order 177? Shit, my pay isn't enough for this.”

The words shook Tim from his stupor. He walked over to the counter.

“Hi,” he said, flashing his most charming CEO grin. “I have a quick question?”

The server's fixed smile contrasted with his dull eyes.

“I need to know what way the boy who ordered this headed.”

“No.”

Tim sighed, “Look, it’s important. My brother-”

“I mean, no, it wasn’t a boy.”

Tim paused. “Huh?”

“It was a girl, a teen girl. Black hair, big blue eyes, French accent. She was sitting over there,” he waved at an empty table. “But I think she walked away before that happened.” Referring to the giant train wreck occurring a few aisles over.

“Oh,” said Tim. “Thanks.”

“Do you want the order?”

Tim held back an annoyed sigh.

“Sure.”

So that’s how he, Jason, and Dick, sat at the abandoned picnic table, staring at the abandoned meal bought with Damian’s credit card. Jason grabbed a couple of fries and shoved them in his mouth.

“That’s evidence, nitwit,” hissed Tim.

Jason ignored him, stabbing a meatball with the plastic fork. “What? It’s going to go to waste. Girlie obviously ain’t coming back for it.”

“We should be more worried about how a random girl used Damian’s credit card!”

“She could have stolen it?” offered Dick.

“Demon spawn would have broken her arm before getting pickpocketed,” countered Jason, eating another fry. Silence. A weird glint appeared in Jason's eye. He turned to Tim. “What did you say the girl looked like again?”

“Black hair, blue eyes, French accent.”

“Shit,” muttered Jason.

“What?”

“I think I ran into her earlier, about an hour and a half ago. Asked her if she had run into demon spawn – she sounded confused and tourist-like. But maybe…”

“Maybe she’s working with him?” offered Tim.

“Could be.”

“Damian? Working with another person? A stranger?” Dick shook his head. “Doesn’t sound like him.”

Jason shoved another fry into his mouth. “The brat’s a competitive little shit, if he thought teaming up would help him get ahead, he’d do it in a heartbeat.” He pointed a fry at Tim. “Can you look at the security footage?”

“I’m already two steps ahead of you,” Tim said, flashing his phone with the hacked in security camera footage on-screen. Jason and Dick huddled in close as a small girl walk on screen and stood at the counter.

“Yep, that’s her. Can you ID her, Timmy?”

Tim rolled his eyes, “This is a smartphone, Jay, not a laptop.”

“I thought Mr. World’s Second Greatest Detective would be prepared for anything.”

“Well excuse me for not having facial recognition software, on my phone.”

“Guys chill.”

“Shut up, Dick,” Jason and Tim said in unison.

The footage played out and they watched the girl order two meals and pay with Damian’s credit card. They switched to another camera when she left and sat at the picnic table. A few minutes later Jason and Tim walked into frame.

“Look, there! She tenses. Look at her body language, she’s panicking. She knows who you two are.” Dick looked shocked that, yes, Damian had teamed up with a partner.

They watched the girl panic, although she managed to keep her body from reacting too much. She placed her phone to her ear and walked away from her spot.

“Who is she talking to?”

“Maybe Damian was watching out of sight?”

“Shoot, Tim, she’s out of frame. Do we have another angle?”

It took another minute or so, but Tim found the right security camera catching the mysterious girl leaving the food court. As she walked away the image on the screen flickered, and a moment later the shelving units fell.

“Oh crap,” swore Jason. “Do you think she has magic? Fuck, it would be just our luck if demon spawn teamed up with someone dangerous.”

Dick shook his head. “It could be a coincidence. We didn’t see her do anything. The chaos could have been a coordinated effort between her and Damian.”

Tim wasn’t so sure. “Come on Dick, you’ve been in the game long enough to know just because something looks one way, doesn’t mean it's true.”

They watched the girl hurry out of sight, this time it was much more difficult to follow her progress through the store. She would randomly duck in and out of showrooms, coming out differently than how she came in. If the three boys hadn’t been trained in stealth and detection for years, they would have had a challenging time tracking her.

Jason whistled low. “Who is this chick? I’m impressed. She has serious skill.”

Finally, she ducked into a showroom and didn’t come out. Tim couldn’t find a camera giving them an unobstructed view, but it didn't matter. They had a destination.  

“This was ten minutes ago, they could already be long gone,” said Dick.

“Or they could still be hiding there,” countered Jason.

“We’ll find out when we get there.” They walked out of the cafeteria and past the closed aisles. The forklift that had been buried under the collapsed shelving unit was being unearthed by a flock of bewildered employees.

“Ten bucks says she has magic,” said Jason.

“Yeah, no.” Tim was good at math and the odds of everything happening just as she left was too big to be a coincidence. “I’m not stupid enough to take that bet.”

“Come on you guys, let’s focus here,” chided Dick.

Walking back through the showrooms Tim kept an eye out for any sign of his brother or his accomplice, but it was as if they had disappeared into thin air. Arriving at the last location they had spotted the girl, they waited for a touring couple to leave before descending on the tiny, boxed room like the detectives they were trained to be.

It didn’t take long to discover the lasered off vent.

“Shit,” groaned Jason. “They could be anywhere by now.”

“Tim can you-”

Tim had his phone in hand, “I’m already on it. I’ll have the vent layout in a minute.” He felt insulted they even needed to ask.

Jason peered into the vent, “Damn, I think we’re too big to follow.”

 Dick sighed. “I miss my vent crawling days; they just don’t make them as big as they used to.”

“That’s what she said,” snickered Jason.

“Focus you two,” Tim snapped. “I’ve pulled up the air duct plans.” He flashed the screen to his two brothers who settled down. “This particular vent runs a couple of places. We have one entrance at the back of the store in the storeroom. Then another veering off near the daycare center, and the last which comes out near the unloading dock.”

“I’ll take the one next to the daycare center,” said Dick. “I’m the only one who isn't demented,” pointing to Jason, “or sleep-deprived,” pointing to Tim.

“Hey!” exclaimed Jason.

Tim sneered, repressing a Damian-like growl, “I wouldn’t be so sleep deprived if you hadn’t dragged us out of the house at eight in the morning. I arrived in from patrol at three.” He hadn’t had coffee in hours, and the weight of his body pressed on him like a panini maker.

Dick ignored them. “Jason can take the one at the loading docks, and Tim you’ll be able to bypass security and get into the back the easiest.”

“Sounds good to me,” grunted Jason.

“Alright,” agreed Tim. “The second any of us spots them, text the group chat, will box them in from there.”

They nodded and headed off their separate ways. Despite the tiredness in Tim's bones, there was a heady rush of the hunt thrumming in his veins. Damian, and whoever he had decided to pair up with, were going down.

Tag List: (Closed, sorry!! I’m so glad you all like it though.)

@multplelifes @bluesimani @justhugefangirl @nik-nak-3@redscarlet95 @purplesundaze @incredulous-reader @k-poplunardreams @our-preciousss @blackmagicforever @vgirl-10123 @lozzybowe @wannajointhecrabcult @dast218 @chaotic-mess-of-a-life @fidget-eep @kawaiigiantjudgefish @queenmj10@tumbling-down-hills-and-stuff @crazylittlemunchkin @fandom-writer642 @nach0ava @ladybug-182 @sam-i-am-0222@spyofthenightcourt @how-to-fuction-properly@emotionalsupportginger @dreamykitty25 @tomanyfandomsonmy-mind @mystery-5-5 @theatreandcomicfreak @weird-pale-blonde-person @whatthechickenfriedfuck @myazael@pawsitivelymiraculous @urbanpineapplefarmer @karategirl119@consumeconstantly @hauntedstudent99 @ertyzeta @thornalchemist23 @iloveitwhen @animegirlweeb@byronsacademics @i-wanna-be-a-ninja @moonlitjiminie@iglowinggemma28 @constancetruggle @catgirlkittypryde @waffelyunsure @maskedpainter @lilkymilky @unhappyraspberry @avengerthewarrior @quotesandanime @tbehartoo @clumsy-owl-4178 @g-arya @chocolateherringtacofan @jalaluvsu @crazyrandomrebel @fatimaabbasrizvi @thenillabean @goblinwhoships @bluefyoto94 @nerinalith @loopingtangent @demonicbusiness @hecate-hallow @themcclan @tropestropestropes @paintedhope7 @whitetiger1249 @glitchon @vulpixmina @kitkat81804 @kissa-chan @beautiful-disasters-sunshine

[rallamajoop]

How (not) to say ‘fuck’ in Etruscan (and other things I cannot believe I spent so much time tracking down for a throwaway joke in a Witcher slash-fic)

Buried in chapter 4 of my fic Something Nice is a joke which, as much as it amused me, no-one else is going to get unless I explain it. So here we go.

For the last few people in this fandom who haven't heard yet: The Witcher 3's vampire-language is Etruscan. To my knowledge, there's never been an official statement from CDPR to confirm this, but the evidence (ie. that basically all the vampire vocab can be found in online Etruscan sources) seems pretty solid. To explain why this made me go oooooh that's so NEAT, we need a little context.

Context!

The Etruscans (in my admittedly far-from-expert understanding) were a people who lived in Italy back before the Romans got around to conquering-slash-assimilating the rest of the peninsula, and the language they spoke is one of the most frustratingly mysterious of the ancient world. Most dead languages are at least related to something modern linguists have a decent handle on, but Etruscan seems to have been related to almost nothing else spoken – it may even have pre-Indo-European roots (a whoooole other tangent I am in no way qualified to cover).

Surprisingly, we do owe our modern Latin alphabet in part to the Etruscans, since the earliest Roman alphabets were adapted from the Etruscan (who got it from the Greeks, who got it from from the Phoneticians, and so on). The Etruscans may even be the reason we're stuck with so many weirdly redundant K-sounds (not only K and C, but X and Q, which are really just 'ks' and 'kw' with an overblown sense of superiority).

But being able to sound out every surplus K-word from an Etruscan inscription isn't much help nowadays when there are no surviving Etruscan dictionaries to tell us what it actually means – not even a decent Etruscan Rosetta stone to give us a push-start. So while modern linguists may rattle off Ancient Greek fluently or puzzle out Egyptian hieroglyphs from thousands of years before the Etruscans even had an alphabet, the Etruscan vocabulary available to us nowadays remains embarrassingly limited. Bits have been figured out from context or thanks to loanword exchanges with their neighbours (plenty of ancient Greeks and Romans certainly spoke Etruscan, even if they failed to write it down), but a lot is still as mysterious to the experts as it would be to you and me.

So why to I love the idea of using Etruscan as the Witcher’s vampire-language so much? Basically, if you want a language that will sound both old and reliably alien to anyone listening to it – be they the mainstream English-speaking market or the original Polish-language audience – Etruscan is a damn good call. You're not going to have much vocabulary to draw from, but it's not like there's a lot of vampire-chatter in the game anyway. It's a cool little easter egg for fans nerdy enough to try and figure out what they're saying.

Translations and Sources

You aren’t going to find a lot of great Etruscan language sources on the web – few of the easily-discovered online sources on Etruscan vocab appear to have been updated within the last ten years, and lord knows how consistent some of these are with current scholarship (let alone how sure linguists can be about anything with a task like this). All the same, have some links you may find useful:

Etruscology – Brief, but more readable than most

Lexicons.ru Etruscan Glossary – Probably one of the best collections of many terms in one place

Maravot.com Etruscan Language pages – Hard to navigate, but gosh there are a lot of vocab here I have not seen elsewhere

Old, Tripod-hosted Etruscan Glossary – I think these are mostly just the same terms from the Lexicons page, but in harder-to-use format

Etruscan word search – Decent, but not the most extensive vocab

Introduction to the Etruscan Language – Looks to be from Maravot.com, but in pdf format

Paleoglot.com’s Etruscan tag – Blog by an actual linguist who regularly discusses Etruscan material, and who even created their own translation applet! – which was, unfortunately, in flash, and is thus no longer usable. (There is a certain irony that even the tools available online to help you understand Etruscan are written in a language that is now no longer supported or understood by any modern browser.)

Not that translating what’s in the game is going to be easy, oh no. Take, for example, the oh-god-please-don't-kill-me ceremonial greeting Geralt has to offer to the Unseen Elder to survive that meeting – "Eclthi, lautni ama".

'Eclthi' is apparently a "demonstrative (locative)" (’here’, ‘there’, etc). "Lautni" is trickier – it means a freed slave, but may also imply a familial relationship or a client of sorts, while the root “lautn” apparently designates simply “possession.” House slaves in the ancient world were often considered part of the family, and freed slaves were an important class in many ancient cultures, who often maintained relationships with their former masters, so you can see the internal logic, but what sense was the Witcher using it in? It’s hard to know.

"Ama" is possibly worse – most translations seem to have taken it as "to be", but sometimes also “to love”, or even "now" or  "meanwhile." Then you hit the question of Etruscan grammar, and I have no idea where I’d even start. So, with a little creativity, you could probably translate that phrase as anything from "take this and consider me a friend" to "meanwhile, this is family" to "a demonstration of love from your slave." I mean, you've got the same general theme going there regardless, but there's a lot of ambiguity in the inflection.

For what it's worth, I feel garasham's translation efforts are easily the most convincing I've seen – they have the above line as “Here I am a slave / a friend / kindred” FWIW. (Mind you, given the wiki doesn't even try to do more than offer you one possible meaning for each word, there's not exactly much competition out there).

So, bringing this all back to that fic and how to say ‘fuck’ in Etruscan...

I've already gone to the web's Etruscan dictionaries once while I was writing Forget-Me-Not, seeking inspiration for a 'real' name for "the Queen of the Night" from the first Witcher game. Neither 'queen' or 'night' got me far, but the Etruscans did apparently have a goddess of the moon called 'Aritimi, Artume or Artames', which worked pretty well. If anything it's almost too close to the better-known Greek goddess Artimis, who was obviously a relative (ancient cultures bleed into each other even when they're not bleeding all over each other, nothing new there), but I'm not going to be picky.

However, being a) a giant nerd, who b) writes a lot of smut, and c) is no more mature deep down inside than the rest of us, I couldn't resist seeing if I could find some slightly more obscene vocabulary. Did the Etruscans have a word for, say, 'fuck'?

Alas, if they did (and I mean, they totally did, c'mon), the web wouldn't tell me about it. Nor could I find much else relating to sex or genitalia (male or female), or even a decent word for 'thrust'.

On the flipside, there were a couple of different terms meaning 'plough'. And anyone who's played – well, any of the games, but especially Witcher 2 – would probably realise exactly why that filled me with so much glee.

Speaking of which, here, have a picture which is in no way related:

The fact that the various Etruscan terms meaning ‘plough’ could also apparently be translated as things like “to worship“ or “to act through movement, including ritual acts,” or that an important mythological figure was “a prophetic child who sprang from a freshly plowed furrow” was in no way discouraging.

The word I ultimately picked was 'esari'. Admittedly, variations on the prefix ‘ar-’/‘ara-’/’aras’ were much more consistently attested to throughout the various online Etruscan dictionaries as ‘terms meaning plow’, but figuring out how to convert an Etruscan prefix into a satisfying word is officially where even my enthusiasm for all this nonsense gives out. Esari was, by comparison, already a much more solid-sounding term, so let’s go with that.

Why go to all this trouble anyway? Well, the honest answer is “entirely for my own amusement”, but the nominal excuse comes right back to “so I could give Regis and Geralt this little exchange during a sex scene.”

"Unless you have any particular objection," said Regis, moving to straddle Geralt's body, "I thought we might engage in some esari... hm, what was the equivalent term in your language again?" The vampire leaned in close to Geralt's ear as he made a show of remembering his answer, "Ah, yes—I thought I'd fuck you."

Never let anyone tell you you never learnt anything from porn!

[astromechs]

this is the start of an idea i had... i keep telling people it was six months ago, but i actually think it was a year ago that i first thought of this, and i kept sitting on it too scared to write it because i didn’t think i’d do it justice. that being said, i’m actually kind of proud of this excerpt, and since i’m feeling soft about one of my oldest and most beloved fandoms today:

i bring you what is — basically my matrix 4 spec fic.

(i do eventually plan on posting this to ao3 as a complete piece when i finish the other parts that i have in mind, because i have plans for this... oh, i have plans.....)

01.

Every single morning, Thomas A. Anderson is jolted awake at approximately 8:15 AM by the shrill of the same alarm, shovels in the same shitty cereal before stumbling into one of the same five shitty suits that he has to remember to get dry-cleaned, takes the same seat on the subway on the way to work — where he sits in the same chair for eight hours straight with minimal breaks, staring at his computer screen (or, more often, out into nothing) until it’s time to take the same subway back to his shitty apartment, order from the same rotation of shitty takeout, and find some mindless, banal distraction while he ignores texts that don’t even matter anyway before he falls asleep to eventually wake up and do it all over again.

It’s nothing special — just the average life of an average mid-grade programmer at the average tech conglomerate. Comfortable, sure, and a dream many would kill to achieve; he knows this, knows this every time he passes the poor old woman who’s feeding pigeons in her ratty coat from the battered metal bench on the sidewalk in front of his apartment building. He slips her whatever spare change he has on him — a $20 bill, on the days he’s lucky, but often less than that — and, without fail, she always accepts, with a warm smile and kind eyes that seem to stare right into his soul, seeing the deepest parts of it.

Like she knows him. And that’s what’s weird.

He tries not to put too much thought into it, because, honestly, he tries not to put too much thought into anything at all; he’s found that to be the most effective way to navigate the machine that systematically runs his rhythmic, mundane life. 

But even so, there are things that he knows he can’t shake.

One afternoon in late February, when the cut of the wind had not remotely suggested that spring would just be a month away, he’d passed the woman on the bench as always, but he could’ve sworn that the whole flock of pigeons scattered on the sidewalk at her feet had frozen for a split second. Like they’d been… glitching. In a blink, everything had returned to normal, and he’d spent about three days (and three sleepless nights) trying to convince himself he’d been seeing things, that he’d just been spending too much time actually working on his assigned program for once and that maybe he should take some of his accumulated vacation days? And the following week, he had, but….

No time off to try to clear his head would ever change the fact that this hadn’t been an isolated incident.

Because sometimes — he swears he sees pieces of code fall through his field of vision; a blink and then they’re gone, but it happens too often not to be a pattern, and no matter how much he might want to for the sake of his own sanity, he can’t just brush that aside. Sometimes, flashes come to his mind like barely-remembered dreams, in idle moments and just on the edge of the line that separates sleep from waking consciousness, so real that he knows they’re memories. 

Dark tunnels that haven’t seen the sun for centuries. Cold, so cold that no amount of warmth, human or otherwise, can really combat. Running, desperately bounding up the fire escape to the third floor of a rundown motel, three men in sunglasses and perfectly-tailored suits in close pursuit, his heart pounding in his ears so loudly he can barely hear the phone ring from Room 303, the place he has to get to, because everything depends on it. A barrage of bullets in his chest, one right after the other, back slumping against the wall as his heart gives out, vision fading to grey and then to black, but a voice, reaching through it all to call him, tether him….

Neo.

There are things that he knows he can’t shake, and sometimes, he thinks he had another life. Another name.

Another purpose.

He’s haunted by the ghost of it.

It’s the second of April — at least, that’s what the screen of his phone tells him, because otherwise he wouldn’t know, or care to know. A Friday, and all the faceless commuters are packed like sardines into this subway car, headed home for weekends that are sure to be as inconsequential as his own. Today, he has to stand holding the rail for the ride home; a woman trying to juggle both a baby and two bags of groceries had just barely managed to stumble onto the train before the doors had closed, and he’d sprung up, more than glad to give up his seat to someone in greater need.

She tries to thank him, profusely and repeatedly, but with where he’s standing, he would have to twist to keep facing her, so, with a nod and the barest hint of a smile, he turns away to spend the trip the way he always does: in solitude.

The route back to the station just down the block from his apartment building is never smooth, by any stretch of the imagination, but today, it’s bumpier than usual; the train car jerks and jostles, until, eventually, it sends him colliding into back of the passenger standing next to him.

He’s just about to stammer out some automatic, awkward apology, but then —

Blue eyes meet his, clear, crisp blue, and a jolt strikes him right to the core.

He thinks — no, he knows, he knows — he’s seen these eyes.

Neo. In the darkest corners of his mind, the voice whispers again.

Time freezes, glitches, around him, around him and this stranger with familiar blue eyes. He sees the light leave them, and then come right back. He sees warmth, what something is telling him had once been the only thing able to keep the cold of the real away; that warmth spreads through now, to the tips of him, and he has a sense, one he doesn’t entirely understand, that something has just clicked into place.

Behind sunglasses, another pair of eyes watches them from across the car.

“You all right?” Neo.

He sees brows knit in concern, and for the first time, he pays attention to the face that the eyes belong to. Probably the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen in… more than one life, he’d have to guess, is now in front of him; he isn’t so detached and disconnected that he doesn’t notice that. Her short dark hair is cut into a severe bob, and she’s dressed in black from head to toe — from her coat and gloves, to her boots. It suits her, somehow.

After a beat, he finally remembers to speak. “Yeah. I — sorry.” The subway jerks to a halt; he glances up, and adds quickly, after clearing his throat, “This is… my stop. Excuse me. Sorry.”

Pushing past her, pushing past everyone in his way, he disembarks to the station, and when his feet touch solid pavement, he takes off at a sprint. Up the stairs (third floor… Room 303….), down the sidewalk (agents, just behind… he can beat them, if he just runs faster than he ever has…), not stopping until the mundane certainty of his shitty apartment building is within his sights.

Just before he makes it safely inside, he catches a glimpse of the old woman on the bench watching him, her smile wider than he’s ever seen it. Maybe, even, almost inhumanly wide.

[miraculouscontent]

Ask Explosion #9:

Asks answering previous posts:

Sabrina, I have one word of advice for you...

R U N

“Chat, please stop talking.”

“But that’s my thing!”

“YOU JINX EVERYTHING!!”

Ayyyyyy~

Well, it’s something, I suppose?

Answered this here.

It absolutely did. Bless you, kind and hilarious citizien. ;P

I’m torn because... on one hand, I want to give proper mythology and such for like--anything that’d be put into the show, but on the other, I liked the idea that Alix’s brother was just sort of a conspiracy who thought of stupid stuff (which is why I kept the concept for MC Jalil Kubdel).

Zoe did it really well in Scarlet Lady where Alix knew the actual mythology and started blurting it out whenever Jalil got it wrong.

New Asks:

Considering “Ikari Gozen,” I imagine Alya and Kagami don’t get along as well. I agree with basically everyone that Marinette and Kagami not getting along is bad, but Alya and Kagami not really getting along makes more sense and is more tolerable.

Since Alya is Marinette’s “““BFF”““ (supposedly), I could see her kind of being like, “You’re competing with my girl over the same guy,” and keeping Kagami at arm’s length, worried that keeping Kagami close will allow Kagami to be closer to Adrien since Adrien is an extension of their friend group (kinda, sorta, not really, but Marinette calling him a friend so technically--)

You know, Alya trying to be a good friend and help Marinette with Adrien in more subtle ways. It’s the wrong way to go about it but she’s trying.

LUKANETTE IS AMAZING IN TERMS OF PROGRESSION KDJNGJDFG, I ADORE IT. Every episode they share together, we either learn something new about them or see more details on their relationship.

I think I was already all-in before “Silencer,” but man, that episode just sealed it even more. I was like well dang, why does the love square even EXIST???

jfdngjkfdjgfdg

Incredible. Only problem is that the creator doesn’t know how to use it properly.

You mean fourteen year olds aren’t perfect human beings???? :o

(no, but really, that’s me all the time; like, she’s barely a teen!)

He’ll believe it if it’s Chat Noir who’s doing it. If Marinette ever does it though, he’ll be sure to shut it down. ;P

Ugggggh, the worst part is that I have the same exact fear that they really are going to be like yeah Ladybug you silly fool Chat Noir has been with you since the beginning!

I mean, we’re already basically getting that with the New York special; Chat was supposed to protect Paris and then didn’t tell Ladybug that he “had to” leave for New York (and the New York thing is inadvertently Marinette’s fault and parts of the fandom actually did blame her for it even though it was Chat’s choice not to say anything), then Ladybug gets upset with him when she discovers it mid-battle, which leads to Chat being distracted and Cataclysming someone (another thing that Ladybug can be “inadvertently” blamed for), then Chat gives up his miraculous so Ladybug isn’t even allowed to be angry and cue the later line of “I can’t imagine being Ladybug without... him.”

So clearly that’s saying something. Adrien doesn’t get anything close to that level and Marinette is chewed out for not asking him to stay when Nino had already asked him too.

It’s like--Marinette chooses to go after Adrien and then gets either nothing in return, or humiliated by the narrative, and then in the New York special, she decides to do nothing and everything still goes wrong while Alya yells at her for it. The “damned if she does, damned if she don’t,” on display is stunning. The girl tries to confess and it’s like, “no, not allowed, but Chat is allowed to confess.”

I still don’t understand this logic of his overarching plot but also “there’s not much of a timeline.” I think the only solid thing we’ve ever gotten was something about all the episodes in one season coming after all the episodes in a previous one, but there are still things that don’t add up? The only thing the season 3 production order will give is making sure the hero debuts work out (so no Viperion or Pegase before “Party Crasher,” for example).

It’s not really reliable. I mean, like--I’ve been experimenting with timelines for a while, and stuff like “Miraculer” baffles me. It’s basically non-canon with no value whatsoever. All it does is make “Heart Hunter” look even more confusing and treats Marinette even more horribly for not picking Chloe when she explicitly told Chloe that she wasn’t getting it back.

I’m not familiar with that one! Is it any good?

(Okay, I actually was too curious and ended up looking it up; fancy! I couldn’t have guessed that it was a webtoon! I started reading the 1st issue and before I knew it, I was on the 6th! Oops~)

Lila is totally Rashta, 100% agree. The fact that the comments have a nickname of “Trashta” for her, equivalent to Liar Rossi, says as much ;P

Because lessons that involve telling someone that they’re valid and allowed to feel a certain way don’t apply to Marinette. Isn’t it nice? :3

Not that I know of? Though I also don’t look for that kind of thing, so it’s possible that it exists and I just don’t know about it.

Even if it did exist thought, I don’t see a problem with you doing your own regardless. Good luck if you do!

No. No I do not. ;P

GREETINGS FELLOW INTJ!

And yeah, I’m not really capable of not analyzing shows. There are some small exceptions, but they’re usually not full shows in the normal sense. If there’s an ongoing plot, my mind tends to be working at all times.

In terms of Miraculous, Season 1 was harmless enough where I was bothered but pretty quiet about it, but then it just got progressively worse. It really feels like one of those things you can’t unsee when it finally hits you, y’know?

I’m glad I was able to help you get that satisfaction you need (and appreciate Lukanette, of course ;3)!

Non-Miraculous Asks:

(some heavy Puella Magi Madoka Magica salt below)

Wow, this is a really dedicated ask! Nice!

Gonna go point by point here:

1 - Yeah, the whole thing with Homura not “being able” to save everyone... kinda questionable, and I didn’t really buy the arguments they used to explain it away. I think there was this one PSP game or something with Madoka Magica where you could kind of choose what happened (like, there were bad ends where Sayaka didn’t get her soul gem back in time and her body was partially decayed; ick) and I think there’s a good end where Homura saves everyone but--yeah, not canon.

I just don’t care for twisted stories like that unless there is actually a good end on the horizon (and I mean like “Everyone Lives and is Happy” good end). Angst is just so exhausting so the second I saw Mami’s head being bitten I was just like, “Ah, okay, so we’re doing this then.”

2 - Eugh, the sexism thing. It’s so... yeah, and especially this because the whole “girls are emotional” thing, I don’t really care whether or not the show is trying to “subvert” or “explain” anything, it just feels like poor taste and I don’t like it. (I also didn’t know about that Death Note thing because I didn’t watch it, but geez.)

3 - Wow, I’ve been away from the show for so long that I forgot what Mami’s wish was; I thought it was to “not be alone” or something (or maybe not die alone?? I really don’t remember), but either way, the fact that it follows some sort of genie wish logic is just--*sigh*--they’re teenage girls, come on (plus, the “genie wish logic” is really overdone to me anyway).

4 - The other thing about Sayaka is that it’s really predictable that she’d “die so quickly.” Basically everything was pointing to her just being annihilated at some point, and being Madoka’s best friend, it was pretty inevitable that she’d go.

((semi-unrelated, but someone also asked me which character’s name was lied about before episode 3 hit and they wondered if it was Sayaka’s; it was Kyubey’s))

Yikes. Sorry you had to experience that.

Anyway, I guess I’m not experienced enough in multiple fandoms to say for sure? If I was ever in a fandom, I would just blacklist the people/stuff I didn’t like, so I didn’t get to see a tong of “bad things” going on.

+ I try really hard not to generalize fandoms into one thing.

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻 𝓝𝓸𝓻𝓶𝓼 𝓐𝓻𝓮 𝓢𝓽𝓾𝓹𝓲𝓭 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓑𝓸𝔂𝓼 𝓐𝓻𝓮 𝓐𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓛𝓲𝓴𝓮 “𝓖𝓲𝓻𝓵𝔂” 𝓣𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼

Oof, uhhh, shows, huh? That’s tough.

I think the main ship from Given (Mafuyu and Ritsuka) is really adorable (you might’ve seen the amusing video of their love being mutual before), and while I would’ve said the same thing for the kinda-sorta side ship, it gets--uh... really bad during the movie/rest of the manga, I’ll just say that much.

Mafuyu and Ritsuka though, totally adorable.

Inuyasha kinda? Though Inuyasha and Kagome are definitely not the kind of romantic chemistry that I lean towards (I find “the bickering couple” to be rather exhausting). Plus, Cardcaptor Sakura did the “male tsundere” better than Inuyasha did (though the Clear Card Arc was terrible, at least it’s not canon kinda-sorta? idk it seems like a mix of the anime and manga so...).

After that there’s...

uh

...

hm.

I mean, there’s probably a couple more examples somewhere, but--yeah, I’ve got nothing. Maybe if I thought back to all the generic children shows I watched when I was little (like those old Disney live-action shows; I had no taste when I was younger), there might’ve been something that satisfied kid me but idk.

I don’t remember what post inspired this, but I have no problem answering regardless, ahaha~

My main issue is Aang’s attitude about the whole thing. I’m not saying it was right of Katara to go out and get “revenge via murder” exactly, but I also think that Zuko had the right idea with allowing her to go and face the man who killed her mother so she could get some form of closure (also note that Zuko doesn’t express any sort of opinion when Katara decides not to kill him; he just wanted her to have whatever she thought she needed to heal).

It’s also the episode where Zuko directly confronts Aang on his “violence isn’t the answer” rhetoric which then goes completely ignored as Aang lionturtles his way out of the conflict. Aang is also not confronted on his point of “forgiveness is the first step to healing” (when Katara has a right not to forgive and Aang isn’t challenged outside of Katara commenting on it) and was permitted to ride his high horse when Katara “steals” Appa like, “It's okay, because I forgive you... that give you any ideas?” which is just--

reaaaaaally "holier than thou”-esque when Aang is like, ten, and Katara is a sort of motherly figure to him. The episode even has Sokka praise Aang for how “wise” he is and I groaned through the entire thing.

Another smaller thing is that it sort of makes the air kingdom look way too “perfect” by having Aang be the “source of wisedom,” especially when it’s like “violence isn’t the answer” while all the other airbenders are dead.

[ecoamerica]

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[sunsetcurve]

THE POST FINALE HENRY DANGER OPINIONS TAG:

thank you for the tag @chenryhart , @ginger--binger , and @henryhearts ! (i used eliza’s version because it had more questions lol)

Who was your overall favourite member of Team Danger and why? i will never be able to decide between charlotte and henry (it’s called being bisexual). i relate to charlotte a lot, and she’s a role model for me; she’s smart, she’s bold, she knows what she wants and i really love her for it. henry, on the other hand—there are moments when i’ve disliked him but i’ve watched him grow up, i’ve watched him be a hero for so long and i do still admire him a lot. he’s brave and loyal and he cares so much about people, like i’ll honestly just be soft for him forever. 

Who was your favourite non-team danger character and why? gonna have to go with bose and mika (who count, right?) because they’re both so pure and enthusiastic and i can’t wait to see more of them

Who was your favourite villain and why? definitely twitler. i think he was the only villain that had actual motivation, and he was definitely the least cringey of all of them. he set up high stakes and challenged team danger a lot.

What were your top five favourite Henry Danger episodes of all time and why? ooh, good one. okay i think the finale is my all-time favorite. it just really was the culmination of the core of this show and there were so many amazing moments between all the characters. the actors and writers delivered so hard. second would have to be back to the danger because that episode was solid start to finish. i love the high-stakes episodes, and the time travel was a really cool aspect. third would probably be the three-parter, because again, i love the high stakes episodes, and that one really brought it. fourth would be broken armed and dangerous because it was completely hilarious. and fifth would probably have to be either double o danger, because i loved getting to see them all dressed up and undercover and joss moss was awesome, or i dream of danger because it was charlotte centric and also chenry. honorable mention to danger games entirely because of that scene where all four game shakers fall in love with henry at once. 

What were your top five least favourite Henry Danger episodes of all time and why? not a fan of henry’s birthday because i can’t watch it without getting incredibly pissed; like it’s a well-made episode i just get really upset while watching it. i hated man of the house because the whole ray trying to get with henry’s mom made me suuuper uncomfortable. i did not like one henry three girls because the cheating plot was not it for me, or sick and wired for the same reason as henry’s birthday, and also because that was definitely the episode where dad!ray started to disappear. and captain mom because...nope.

What was your favourite running gag and why? oh god i have so many that i made a full post about this. the hmm thing was awesome, especially the fact that they acknowledged it. i also love the “piper has a license—established” joke 

What was your favourite one-off throw away gag and why? gonna steal @henryhearts answer here and say the cat universe that respected charlotte; also bringing back the bro song from the musical that one time.

What episode, which character and which duo made you laugh the most? episode would definitely be broken armed and dangerous. laugh after laugh. the arm fashion show? the part where henry’s like “i’m plum-tuckered!”? the sign language interpreter? peak. character would be henry because i LOVE the way he reacts to stuff, like when he does his little *hand clasp* “there is something wrong with you” or like “dude, dude, dude, dude, dude—”. duo would probably be ray and henry because bose was right, their banter is hilarious.

What episode, which character and which duo made you the most emotional? episode would be the finale, and i feel like i don’t have to explain myself there. character would also be henry, like, the whole “i was thirteen!” thing and the fact that he’s given so much to this makes me want to cry sometimes. duo would be chenry because they’ve been together since the beginning and i have way too many feelings about them.

How would you rank each season from 1 to 5, one being the best and five being the worst? this is difficult, because i think season 5 is my favorite overall because of it had so many solid episodes and high stakes and good plots, but there were also sooo many things i didn’t like. still! i think it takes the top spot. after that would be season 2, just because it was really fun and fresh and in that stage where they’d started to figure things out as a show but weren’t getting cocky just yet. then probably season 3, then 1, then 4, because that season didn’t really have anything that stood out to me besides back to the danger. 

Who was your favourite duo in the show (romantic or non-romantic)? chenry, but hensper and chasper were both very close seconds

What was your favourite Henry and Ray moment/episode? blimp scene and i don’t think it’s necessary for me to elaborate

What was your favourite Chenry moment/episode? toss up between the lion scene in idod and the time jerker because of “this is for you, char” and the hug at the end

What was your favourite Hensper moment/episode? when jasper found out oh my god. that was SO good. also love muffin and “as henry’s best friend...and soulmate”

What was your favourite Chensper moment/episode? oh god The Scene in the finale when henry is telling char to get out of there and she’s not leaving him and jasper has to carry her out and it just shows how much they all care for each other. and the fact that they all went to dystopia together!

If you could go back and change one element of the show, what would it be? RESPECT. CHARLOTTE. PERIOD. (i would change a lot of ray’s character as a whole, especially season 4/5 tbh)

If you could say one thing to each main character in the pilot, what would it be? i would tell the trio to stick together, appreciate each other, and don’t forget to be kids. i would tell ray not to bring a 13 year old kid who doesn’t have powers into this.

If you could say one thing to each main character in the finale, what would it be? i’m proud of you

Were you satisfied with the finale? What part was your favourite and what part was your least favourite? yes. i think overall there are always going to be things they could have handled better. but i’m happy with the way it ended. i think it’s fitting and wonderful and i felt good. favorite part would be the entire part in the finale with henry arguing with ray about who’s going to go down and later with char and jasper for them to leave. partially because i’m a glutton for angst, but also because the actors put so much into it and it was a real display of emotion and feels, and it showed henry’s selflessness and heroic nature so plainly. least favorite was the fact that char never got an apology from ray.

What would your ideal Henry danger spin off look like? dystopia!!!!!!!! the trio fighting crime in dystopia but it’s pg-13 and also they’re falling in love. also they sometimes come back to visit ray and mentor the danger force kids.

Where do you personally see the characters 10 years from now? What are they doing, who are they with, where are they in their lives - what do you think happened to them? Most importantly, are they happy? i think the trio is going to be living and fighting crime together for a while. char runs a charity on the side, jasper does photography, and henry is a botanist. but they’re first and foremost a team. piper runs a media company and ray and schwoz are being parents to the DF kids. they all still have thanksgivings together and yes, they’re all very happy.

What was your favourite part of the show and why did it initially draw you in? so i watched the thundermans right before this, and the whole reason i got into it was because i love anything superhero related but i wanted something lighthearted instead of my usual gritty dctv shows. i stayed for the humor and because the kids were cute, and yeah i did develop a crush on henry as the seasons went on. sue me.

What was your favourite part of the fandom and why did it initially draw you in? the people are so! freaking! supportive! i made some really amazing friends through this fandom, and everyone is sooo talented and kind and just unproblematic as hell. i love it.

Describe your overall emotions/feelings regarding the show being over and the show in general, looking back on it as a whole, with one quote from the show. the iconic “feels good”

If you were able to add one scene in the finale, what would you add? charlotte getting a goddamn apology and some recognition. also i would’ve liked to see the in-between of the blimp crash and the funeral, aka henry reuniting with ray, jasper, and char after they all thought he was dead

Favorite outfit/hair style? i LOVED the trio’s looks in the epilogue. char’s outfits every single episode? their looks in double o danger. piper and henry’s sister twister outfits were also very cute. for each character: i like char’s braids, henry with the curly hair he had in the finale, jasper in a crop top, ray’s bangs and blazer, and that one time schwoz was in a leotard and tutu.

Least favorite character? mine would be jake hart, and i feel like that’s another one of those things that doesn’t need an explanation

one twist: add one question at the end for the next person to answer! tag at least two people so this spreads around!

i’m tagging @bitchmilsky @cactus-con @rorythevambire @bijerbear @mychenrymadness and anyone else who wants to do it!

[shinylitwick94]

Results of Star Wars reading month!

A while ago I mentioned that I had, first accidentally, then on purpose, turned january into a sort of “Star Wars reading month”, meaning that the only things I read this month were Star Wars books, and I read quite a few of those.

Overall it was a pretty fun experience. The quality of the writing and my enjoyment of the stories definitely varied, but most of these were very easy to read, and relatively short, which is why I managed to read so many in such a short period.

I did have some issues, of course. Sometimes the writing felt very weak, some books have very flat characters and some books suffer from problems with how closely they’re stuck following the stories of the movies.

But overall, I think I liked it and I might pick up some more of these later.

Disclaimer: Obi-Wan is my favorite SW character. So there will be a lot of Obi-Wan in this.

So, here are my thoughts on each of these, in the order that i read them in:

(under the cut because this is looong)

Revenge of the Sith (Novelization), by Matthew Woodring Stover (status:Legends)

After a bit of reflection and reading recommendations online, I decided to start with this one. I think it was a good move. RotS is one of my favorite Star Wars movies and the book does a lot to combat its worst issues. The dialogue sounds more natural, more time is spent on exploring Anakin’s messed up state of mind before he falls, and a few nice scenes are added to give extra context to the actions of certain characters. I didn’t love what it did with Dooku and some of the tools it decides to use (this is... or Anakin’s fear dragon, for instance) become repetitive pretty quickly, but all in all I enjoyed this one a lot. The opening with the republic citizens watching the Chancellor’s kidnapping on the holonet was especially nice and really makes me wish we had more of that in the movies themselves.

4.5/5

Master and Apprentice, by Claudia Gray(status: Canon)

Master and Apprentice follows Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan before the events of the saga, at a moment where their relationship as master and padawan is at a crossroads. The story itsel is fairly simple and not that engaging on its own, but what I like about this one is the time it takes to explore these two characters. It’s pretty solid and I liked it, but I wouldn’t call it a must read.

3.5/5

Lost Stars, by Claudia Gray (status: canon)

I think I enjoyed Claudia Gray’s writing much better in this one than in the previous one. Lost Stars is a bit special, in that it doesn’t follow any main characters. Instead, it follows two original characters in their journey through the galaxy at the time of the OT. It’s part love story, part “let’s see the OT through an outside perspective” and it works pretty well. I quite liked the new characters and their friends and I think they fit in pretty well with the established universe. A few of the main characters have cameos, but really, this isn’t their story. I also appreciated some moments where it calls out a few of the absuridities of the OT, such as Lando leading the attack on death star II and Vader chasing after the falcon so obsessively, both of which look extremely weird from an outside perspective. The only thing I don’t really like is that the story feels really restricted by the OT canon, so you can kind of guess where everything is going after a certain point.

4/5

Kenobi, by John Jackson Miller (status: legends)

Obi-Wan has adventures after arriving on Tattooine when he really, really would rather not get involved. I absolutely loved this one. I liked the writing, I liked Obi-Wan’s character, I liked the new characters (although I had trouble keeping track at first), and I liked the plot. It has a slower start than most of the others here, but it definitely pays off. Without going into too much detail, I particularly appreciated Obi-Wan’s issues with having to let go of the “let’s help everyone” jedi mentality, the exploration of the Tusken raiders, and the fact that it didn’t actually focus on Luke and the Lars’ at all, which I admit I had rather been dreading. 

5/5, and my favorite of the bunch

Darth Plagueis, by James Luceno (status legends)

This one started off really strong, but then fell a little flat by the end. It tells the story of Plagueis’ rise as sith lord, and later his relationship with Palpatine. I enjoyed Plagueis’ character and the writing was pretty solid throughout. all the political machinations were hard to keep track of at first, but after some time and a little help from wookiepedia my brain began to make sense of things. Its strongest moment by far is an event halfway through the book when the two sith lords are attacked by another faction that shows us both their ruthlessness and the fact that they can, in fact, be caught off guard. Plagueis is wonderfully sinister, but Palpatine comes off as even more coldhearted, which is fitting. The one thing I didn’t like, and the reason I felt the ending was a little flat, is that it tries too hard to tie into the Phantom Menace at the end. I think the story would have benefitted from letting Plagueis die earlier and not have its final events tied up in the movie’s plot.

4.5/5, and my second favorite

The Rising Force (Jedi Apprentice #1), by David Wolverton (status:legends)

This one is aimed at kids, and it shows. But because I can never get enough obi-Wan, I decided to read it anyway. It focuses on young Obi-Wan, at risk of not being able to become a jedi knight, and his difficult first meetings with Qui-Gon, and the little adventure they accidentally end up on. As a kids’ book, the writing is easy even by SW standards, and that’s saying something. Like, an 8 year old could probably read this just fine. The story is also pretty simplistic and works on building the foundations for the later development of these characters. It’s the first in a pretty long series, so it doesn’t get that far, but it was fun enough, I guess.

3/5

Heir to the Empire (#1 in Thrawn trilogy), by Timothy Zahn (status: legends)

I had high expectations going into this thing and none of them were met. I’ve read a bit on the side, and I can appreciate how it was an important story for the franchise as a whole, but it really did nothing for me. This is partly, I think, because my expectations were so high in the first place. Everyone seems to think that the Thrawn trilogy is the best thing to ever happen to Star Wars, but from my impressions of this first book it was just...meh. It takes place in the years following the fall of the empire, where the new republic faces threats from the imperial remnants, one of which is lead by Grand Admiral Thrawn. Thrawn as a character is adored by the fandom, and I really don’t get it. He’s dispassionate (pseudo)rational, supposedly very Smart and apparently can predict how people will act because he studies their country’s art (which...stinks of 19th century “scientists” measuring skulls, but whatever let’s pretend this doesn’t bother us). He doesn’t really have any particular outstanding character traits outside of this. What I’m trying to get to, is he’s a bit of a Sue and not very interesting to read about. Then there’s Mara Jade, who is also introduced in this, and who I also didn’t particularly like, but yeah. The story told in this is actually pretty short - the trio is having issues, Luke get’s captured for a while and then there’s a big battle at the end. It’s fine, there’s nothing particularly wrong with it, the writing is ok, and maybe the characters are a little flat sometimes, but overall it’s ok. I just don’t get why people adore this so much. Personally, I’ve no interest in the rest of the trilogy.

3/5

Path of Destruction (#1 in Bane trilogy), by Drew Karpyshyn (status: legends)

This one tells the story of the rise of Darth Bane, he who would establish the rule of two for the Sith. The early parts of this felt quite interesting, and I liked how Bane’s character was different from what we usually get in SW, especially in terms of background. But once the story gets to the sith academy, it just stalls. There’s a lot of back and forth between Bane, the masters and the other apprentices, a lot of musings from Bane on the nature of the dark side, and theoretically all this should work, but at some point during this part of the story I just stopped caring about any of the characters. Maybe it’s because I find the whole dark side philosophy thing quite silly, or maybe I just didn’t find the writing all that engaging, or maybe it was that I already knew what was coming so much of this felt like padding. In any case, it’s a decent enough read, but doesn’t make it past meh for me.

3/5

[withthekeyisking-writer]

What's your fav fic that you wrote yourself?

This is such a challenging question! Like asking which of my children is my favorite 😂 I could definitely tell you a few of my least favorite though lol, no prob. Some of my older stuff—oof.

Alright, so since I really can’t pick a singular fav (I currently have 101 posted works, that’s just not gonna happen) how about I give a top 10? Not exactly what you asked, but eh life is like that 😁

So, in no particular order, my top ten fav fics that I’ve written:

1. Starting with the one that’s a large presence in my mind, (No) Places of Safety. This fic is my baby right now, shaping up to be one of the biggest things I’ve ever written (already at 69k and not even close to done) which is super amazing, because I usually have a problem with sticking to things after a while. I really love the way I’ve handled Dick’s deteriorating mental state, and I love the fact that I know exactly where it’s going, and have from the very beginning (again, rare for me. Usually things come together as I’m writing, and while that’s still happening, it’s been awesome having an actual solid plan and destination). I love the universe I’ve set up here, and am so excited with every chapter to show you guys what comes next. Hell I love this universe so much that I already have the whole next fic planned out 😋

2. Next I’ll say Three Little Birds Sat On My Window. I loved writing a reverse batfam, and am so proud of the way this fic turned out. I really spent a lot of time trying to get everyone’s voices right, how different they would be considering how different their life experiences would be. Tim and Jason especially were important to get right, with Tim being the one who died instead. I always hated in reverse batfam fics when people just make Tim’s version of Red Hood exactly the same as what Jason was like, because they’re different people and would have different ways of approaching things. So even in just the little glimpses I wrote, I’m really proud of their characterizations, along with that of Damian and Dick! I’m just overall very proud of this fic, and definitely wan to write more of this AU at some point in the future.

3. Third we’ll go with An Active Imagination (and, with it, the sequel Rules of Architecture). Thinking about these fics and working on them ways makes me excited as a writer. Like I don’t really have a lot to say about these, just that I really love the way I handled Dick’s shifting mental state, going back and forth between the brainwashing and having him be not at all aware of what’s going on. I also love how super creepy Slade is lol, how unabashedly awful. Plus writing a BAMF Dick is always a blast, and the Dick in these two fics is especially badass.

4. Next up is Take My Hand Through the Flames, because writing dark!Dick was so fucking fun, and something I need to do again very soon. Dick is so messed up here, so blood-thirsty and masochistic and crazy, which is something that I’ve never been able to truly do when I mainly write Dick. So that plus building an Earth 3 universe (pulling in Joey and Rose and what Dick’s dynamic with Thomas is like) was a blast to do.

5. Hmmm then let’s go with If Night Falls in Your Heart (and am just now realizing how often I use song lyrics and quotes for my titles). Exploring the trauma of what Catalina and Mirage did to Dick was something necessary for me to write, and it helped me work through some of my own shit I was struggling with. (Writing is the best coping mechanism!) Dick desperately needs people to help him and tell him none of that was his fault, and since canon certainly isn’t going to do it, I took it upon myself lol. Plus I’ve become strangely fond Dave the Unimportant Villain 😂

6. Sixth on the list is How Arbitrary Fate Is, an AU I am extremely fond of and seriously need to come back to. Teen Titans (cartoon) ‘verse is always something I enjoy writing, and extending the apprentice arc, playing with Stockholm Syndrome, blending Dick’s loyalty to his friends with his growing loyalty to Slade, how he reaches acceptance that this is his life now—I am so proud of the way this fic turned out. I have an entire sequel planned out in my head, other things have simply taken precedent. I will come back to it, though. Lol I want to scream from the rooftops to get everyone to love this fic as much as I do 😁

7. Now I’ll say A Current of Fate, which is something I go back and forth on loving but it always draws my attention back to it. I hate that I’ve set it aside for so long, I think there’s so much fucking potential in this world I’ve set up, and I really want everyone to see the way it’s playing out in my head!! But for that I’d actually have to keep writing it lol, the horror. Sometime soon (when I have less active projects on my hands) I’ll go back to this fic and edit it a little, update it to how much more confident I’ve become in my writing, especially of DC characters. Also Chapter 4 has been half written for literally a year now and it has Black Mask in it; since beginning that chapter I’ve become far more familiar with Roman (and written a lot of him lol) so reworking that chapter in the main priority, and then I think I can really move forward with this fic. I know exactly what happens, I just have to get there!! (Coincidentally, today is the year anniversary of the last time I updated this.)

8. Leaving the DC fandom, next we’re going with The Source of Grief. My Harry Potter fics have been touch and go, I can admit that, but I’m very proud of this one. I really loved doing the outside POV, everyone observing the actions of Harry and not really knowing who he is or what his motives are. I also got to address all my feelings about Severus Snape, which was awesome. Just, fixing problems and making things better was wonderful to write, and I got to put in some subtle Wolfstar lol, and talk about how Regulus Black doesn’t get enough credit. Idk, I’m kind of rambling, but I’m proud of this fic.

9. Ninth is One of the Legion Lost (plus its sequel Want the Strange and New). They’re both my Fuck You to Infinity War lol (which I liked a lot more than I know most people do, but still it needed some help). Loki is one of my favs, and bringing him into the plot of the movie and adjusting things from there is the kind of thing I love to do—what are the repercussions if just one thing is different? Also I enjoyed exploring the magic of the infinity stones! There was so much that could be done with them, with their level of sentience that was never really expanded upon, so I liked doing that.

10. Now we have People Who Move the World. A James Bond & Sherlock crossover, where Q and Jim are brothers. I got super far in this fic! 15 chapters and 94k, it’s a real beast. I love how I wrote Q, his relationship with Jim and Bond and Sherlock, and the odd little Q/Mycroft ship that I’ve become strangely fond of considering how strange the ship is lol. Just writing a bunch of absolute geniuses BAMFs ruling the world and making things go the way they want to them. Like, Q and Jim make such an awesome team and I know it’s such a niche fic but I’m really proud of it. Sucks that a majority of the ideas dried up lol, because I’m very pleased with what I created.

+1: Honorable mention! Breathe with Confidence. First time I ever wrote anything in the Star Wars universe, and it’s absolutely something I’m gonna have to come back to. The AU has a lot of potential, and I know exactly how I’d address the future of Dick’s story. Plus some side fics of the family’s reactions to what happened, the confusion over Dick’s disappearance. And in this fic itself I liked writing Slade’s manipulations, Dick’s desires, the small amounts of background I included. Idk, I just think this world is super cool.

Well, I hope you enjoyed reading this long drawn out thing! Probably more info than you were looking for 😁😅

[neoduskcomics]

Ranking All 10 Star Wars Movies

The final installment in the Skywalker Saga (as it is now retroactively being christened) is upon us, and so I’ve decided to do a bit of a retrospective on all the films leading us here.

The purpose of this personal ranking is not to put down any particular films or to invalidate anyone else’s opinions. In fact, I will be focusing largely on what I like about each movie, rather than what I think was wrong with it. I’ll still touch on criticisms of each film, but know that even if I don’t think they’re all objectively amazing films, I still like every single one of them, and have watched each one numerous times.

The fandom, as it always has been, is so weighed down with hatred and lashing out and segregation, that it overshadows the unabashed joy and love that many still hold for that galaxy far, far away. And so, I’d like to put that anger away for a second, and just talk about why each of these movies holds a special place in the Star Wars saga.

10. The Phantom Menace

Chronologically the first film in the series, and also the first on this list. I saw this movie when I was pretty little, and I have to say, it’s the first Star Wars film I ever saw that I actually enjoyed. When I was a kid, I never cared for the original trilogy. Those movies bored and, to be honest, kind of frightened me. But Phantom Menace was replete with colorful visuals, whacky humor and loads of CGI action. That appealed to me quite a lot.

Yes, in retrospect, the plot is contrived, the characters are incredibly bland and pacing is all over the place, but it was my gateway drug into the magic that the rest of the franchise had to offer. And I’m gonna say it -- Jar Jar Binks was probably half the reason the movie kept my attention for as long as it did. All the other characters were so stuffy and stoic, and all they talked about was an overly complicated plot of political intrigue; Jar Jar added some much needed humor and levity for my childhood self to stay interested. It’s heavily flawed for sure, but I can’t rag on this movie too much when I have it to thank for the love that I have for the series now. Besides, Darth Maul kicks ass, right?

9. Attack of the Clones

Is it controversial to rank this above The Phantom Menace? My reasoning is twofold: 1) The movie has an actual emotional throughline to follow, that of Anakin being frustrated with his feelings of fear, resentment and love; and 2) There’s a lot more action. The Phantom Menace was my first step into the shallow side of the Star Wars pool, but this movie is what got me to dive in headfirst.

Is the dialogue embarrassingly terrible? Yes. Is it 75% CGI fluff? Yes. And as a kid, I ate all that stuff up. Plus, honestly, the movie’s not all bad. People started liking Ewan McGregor as Obi-Wan with this movie, as the charming, dry-humored, slightly exasperated mentor. We got a load of lightsaber fights, and chases through cityscapes and asteroid fields. There was a ton to think was cool about this movie. Sure, it’s still messy and awkward, and it’s loaded to the brim with outbursts of teenage angst, but this is the film that really got me to think lightsabers, starships and bounty hunters were just the most awesome things ever. You can bet I had a few specific items on my Christmas list that year.

8. Solo

I saw Solo a second time this year, and on a re-watch, I actually enjoyed it quite a lot more. It’s fun and frantically paced, there’s loads of Star Wars fanservice, and the lead actor actually does a pretty good impersonation of a young Han Solo. The supporting cast is pretty likable, too, and the dialogue is always snappy. The action sequences were exciting, and while the movie does go out of its way to try to answer every single question about Han-related trivia, I still think it’s fun to see how things unfolded.

Sure, the movie is pretty hollow when it comes to its themes. Han doesn’t get a very solid character arc in the movie, and we definitely don’t see a very cohesive transformation from relatively altruistic kid to completely self-centered nerf-herder -- and that’s a real shame. But honestly, as a Star Wars side story and blockbuster action film, I think it’s a pretty solid couple hours of entertainment. If you shrugged this movie off when it came out or weren’t impressed and haven’t seen it since, I say maybe give it another chance. You might still not like it, which is totally fair, but maybe tempered expectations and a slightly more lenient attitude will allow you to enjoy it a bit more this time around.

7. Rogue One

Now, as much as I enjoyed Solo as a relatively shallow but fun Star Wars action movie, it is not my favorite Star Wars movie of that brand. That honor goes solely to Rogue One. This movie is pure Star Wars fan service. You got X-wings, TIE fighters, stormtroopers, AT-STs, AT-ATs, star destroyers, new ships and infantry armor, and let’s not forget Darth Vader. That scene with him at the end of the film is one of my all-time favorite scenes in any Star Wars movie. I got chills watching that sequence. It was everything I’d ever wanted from a Darth Vader cameo.

Now, Rogue One might be almost nothing but action and fanservice -- most of the main cast of characters is not terribly interesting or memorable -- but that’s okay. This is a lot of people’s new favorite Star Wars movie, and I don’t think it’s hard to see why. It’s basically everything fans loved most about the prequels -- the spectacle, the new worlds, the new weapons, the new soldiers, while still trying to keep true to the spirit of the franchise, and making nods to its roots. The characters can be bland, and some of the fights drag on a bit, but it’s still a thrilling ride. Also, K-2SO is probably the funniest character in any Star Wars film.

6. The Last Jedi

This movie has some of the greatest, most powerful moments in the entire franchise. Rey’s relationship with Kylo Ren and their confrontations with Luke were an incredible emotional foundation to the story. Many of the visuals were dazzling, and not all but many of the jokes landed pretty well. Luke was provided with a realistic and interesting character arc that gave room for actual growth and depth and struggle -- not simply making him another wise old Jedi Master with a padawan who turned to the dark.

This movie took a lot of risks, and not all of them panned out for sure. I disagree with a lot of the narrative choices in this film, especially when it comes to how Kylo Ren and Rey’s relationship ends up by the end of the movie, and what they did with Poe and Finn. However, I cannot understate how great I think other elements of the story were. This is the movie that made me actually start to feel like Rey was a more fleshed-out character, and it made Kylo Ren my new favorite character in the sequel trilogy (also I really like the fight with the praetorian guards, which I guess is a controversial opinion?). While the movie is deeply flawed, it also has a lot in it that is deeply good, and that is definitely worth something.

5. Return of the Jedi

It was very close for me between this movie and The Last Jedi, but I settled on placing episode 6 higher because, to me, it just presents a more elegant narrative with a more cathartic resolution. Return of the Jedi gives us a strong and satisfying conclusion to Luke’s story, and is probably full of more heart and love than any other installment in the series, showcasing bonds between Han and Leia, Leia and Luke, and a reforged bond between Luke and his father. The team is reunited, and it feels so good.

That being said, the movie does have its share of flaws, many of which are in common with The Last Jedi. A lot of the movie feels like needless padding and sort of wasted screentime for the main characters, aside from Luke, who didn’t get much of a meaningful role in the story. However, I feel that it’s counterbalanced by the fact that this film also has some of the most powerful drama in the series. Luke’s confrontation of Vader and the Emperor is wonderfully tense and exciting, and it comes to a stirring conclusion. Plus, Han, Leia, Chewie, C-3PO and R2-D2 are all still their lovable selves, bantering away and getting in way over their heads. It’s kind of hard to not find the film charming. All in all, a great way to wrap up an iconic trilogy.

4. Revenge of the Sith

I remember when this film came out, some critics even went so far as to say it was “better than the original trilogy.” While that’s certainly up for the fans to debate, I do think this movie demonstrated a sense of clarity that was lacking in either of the other prequels. It’s a story all about one thing -- Anakin wants to stop his wife from dying a certain death, and will do whatever it takes to make that happen. The resulting story is filled with incredibly potent pain, fear, anxiety, suffering and darkness, as Anakin fights and eventually gives into temptation.

Okay, yeah, the dialogue is still mostly terrible, and the acting can still feel forced and awkward, but I think if you’re able to look past that, you’ll see what it easily the strongest narrative in the prequel trilogy. It also has a lot of things that the other two prequels were missing: humor (the entire beginning sequence is a fun and largely comical ride not found in the other prequels), memorably dramatic scenes (“Did you ever hear of the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise?”) and the wickedly over-the-top Emperor finally taking the spotlight with his cackling and pontificating. It may not be the most gracefully crafted movie in the series, but it does have one of the most powerful stories to tell, and I think that’s what ultimately shines through.

3. The Force Awakens

I love this movie. The action, the effects, the characters, the humor -- it is a cavalcade of blockbuster science-fantasy wonder. Abrams did an outstanding job retooling the original trilogy to suit a modern audience, with new, creative takes on the faceless, nameless stormtrooper, a Darth Vader stand-in who knows he’s a stand-in and hates it, and a burgeoning hero doesn’t run toward adventure but away from it. There is an energy, a sort of vitality, to this film that I don’t think you can find in any other installment in the series. It’s dazzling, powerful and full of spirit.

And yes, it has its own fair share of flaws. The political situation is weirdly under-explained, the movie heavily relies on the original films as a template for the plot’s structure, and Rey could’ve used more coherent development as the protagonist of the film. However, I wholly and heartily believe that the movie more than makes up for all of that with its unique and charming cast of original characters. I loved Poe Dameron, Kylo Ren, Finn, and the returning Han and Chewie in this story. They all did wonderful performances with snappy dialogue, great performances and thrilling fights. It would’ve been great if the studio had tried to stray from the norm more, sure, but The Force Awakens, in my eyes, is still an exhilarating, warm and entrancing entryway into the territory of a new era for the franchise.

2. A New Hope

This one was tough to place. If I’m being completely honest, I think I probably actually like The Force Awakens more as a film, but it just doesn’t sit right with me to not give priority to the original. And I think credit should be given where credit is due: this movie, for better or worse, revolutionized cinema. It’s the movie that started it all, defying all odds and expectations. It’s the ideal archetype of the hero’s journey; a boy from humble beginnings meets with an old mentor who shows him a much bigger, brighter, and scarier world that he must face for the good of the world he lives in. Along the way, we meet some of the most iconic and memorable characters in the history of film -- Han Solo, Princess Leia, C-3PO, R2-D2 and the ever-lovable Darth Vader.

Now, has this movie been overly mythologized? Yes. Has it in many respects aged poorly? Sure. It totally has. The dialogue can be goofy, the action can look hokey and the pacing can feel terribly slow. But a lot of people will throw statements around like “It’s only famous because it was the first” when looking at movies like the original Star Wars, or the characters contained within. But I think that line of reasoning is misguided. Cheesy sci-fi features, space operas, action movies, roguish characters, princesses and humble heroes were not invented by Star Wars or George Lucas, just as people with superhuman abilities were not pioneered by the creators of Superman. And yet, this movie stood out in all of moviemaking history, proving that it had accomplished what no film like it had before. It is not a beloved film simply because it was the first. It’s the first because it was beloved.

Honorable Mention: The Clone Wars

Not the movie, the series (because the movie was basically just the pilot to the series that honestly shouldn’t have been shown in theaters). It doesn’t technically qualify for this list, but I just have to mention it (honorably). This series took a look at the prequels, for all their flaws, and said “I can make people like this era of Star Wars.” And you know what? They succeeded. The versions of Obi-Wan, Anakin and the many clone troopers featured in this series are now often the versions people think of when remembering the Clone Wars era of the saga. It was a rollercoaster of a series, with surprisingly dark and dramatic stories, as well as shockingly good action and visuals.

Sure, there were a lot of subpar episodes, but those aren’t what people remember. People remember a version of Anakin that made him a likeable hero, a new Jedi padawan for the audience to identify with, new stories that deepened and expanded upon the lore of the universe, and some really cool warfare that honestly blows a lot of what we saw in the actual prequel films out of the water. If you haven’t seen it yet, get a free trial of Disney + and start binging.

1. The Empire Strikes Back

Okay, okay, yeah, we all saw this coming. Not exactly an original opinion, is it? Still, I can’t deny that I solidly believe The Empire Strikes Back to be the best-made Star Wars film. It may not have the razzle-dazzle of the prequels or the sequels, and it may not have the satisfactory finality of Revenge of the Sith or Return of the Jedi. But what this film does have is care. It’s a movie that feels like it was carefully crafted from top to bottom, with every scene, every narrative throughline, every theme and every line of dialogue.

This is where we got “Do, or do not. There is no try.” This is where we got “I am your father.” This is where we got “I love you/I know.” This is where Vader really cemented himself as the end-all-be-all big bad of the Star Wars galaxy. This is where Han and Leia became the cinematic couple of a lifetime. This is where we really learned about the Force, the Jedi and what sorts of trials Luke would have to face were he to take on that legacy. It’s a magical film, full of wonder, hope, darkness, tragedy and love.

I won’t say it’s a perfect Star Wars movie, because it’s not. No Star Wars movie is. But that’s the beauty of the franchise. Everyone values something different about Star Wars. Everyone has their own favorite movie or series or book or comic or even theme park ride. It’s a phenomenon that spans generations, each one looking back fondly on the era that came before. There were people who grew up on the original trilogy, and now we have people who grew up on the prequels. And in just a few short decades, we’ll have people who grew up with BB-8, Kylo Ren and Rey, and that, to me, is just fantastic.

I know many of you have already written off Star Wars, or at least the new movies, but I am both nervous and excited to see where this all goes in seven days. And I know that there are many of you out there still celebrating Star Wars, holding it dear to your hearts, and not forgetting the feeling it gave you whenever you first fell in love with the franchise. I hope that feeling stays with us, and that it cuts through all the hatred and shouting and derision.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to watch today’s episode of The Mandalorian.

[greyias]

FIC: Smoke and Mirrors - Chapter 5

Title: Smoke and Mirrors Fandom: SWTOR Pairing: Theron Shan/f!Jedi Knight Rating: T Genre: Pre-Relationship, Slow Burn Synopsis: Something’s rotten on Carrick Station, and Theron won’t rest until he finds out what. But picking at the frayed threads of suspicion quickly unravels a conspiracy much larger than even the Republic’s top spy can handle on his own. (A mostly canon-compliant retelling of the Forged Alliances storyline, as seen through the eyes of Theron Shan.) Author’s Notes and Spoilers: See Chapter 1.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Crossposted to AO3 | Chapter 6

So while on the side of annoying, apparently Darok’s habit of repeating a battle plan until everyone could recite it in their sleep worked. Or maybe the strategy that the colonel and Jace had come up with was just that solid, because everything went off exactly as outlined. As much as Theron hated to admit it, it was a refreshing change of pace. The way things tended to go in the intelligence world, he tended to have to fall back on Plan Forn, or more probably more accurately, Plan “Frak”, since that word seemed to be uttered a lot under his breath.

The first wave of the attack caught the Imperials completely off guard, and the strike team was able to establish a landing zone with almost no casualties. 

A holographic image of Korriban shimmered into life on part of the table as the holocam on the other end came online. The distance between the Core Worlds and Imperial Space meant the connection was weaker, and combined with interference from scrambling signals on the ground caused the image to flicker more than usual. Theron had seen holos of the Sith homeworld before, but it was somehow different watching from a live feed. Not quite like being there, but close enough. Their view from the holocam caught the wide desert expanse, the silhouettes of immense statues looming in the distance. The drop zone was situated perfectly on a high edge overlooking the Wilds, giving him and Darok a wide view of the stretch that the strike team would have to traverse to reach the Sith Academy.

Theron glanced over to another projection on the table, mapping out the approximate position of Wave Two. They were about to come out of hyperspace. He keyed his comm to the frequency he’d set for his communications with Highwind. It was showtime.

“—I’m aware how this could be difficult.” The transmission cut in in the middle of the Highwind’s sentence. Her voice was pitched low, probably in an attempt to keep her conversation quiet. “If you want to stay here, I understand.”

“You’re kidding, right?” Another female voice volleyed back. “I’m not letting you go into that place alone.”

“Kira,” Highwind’s concerned tone lightened with a trace of amusement, “how can I be alone with the rest of our crew and these soldiers?”

Ah, Kira Carsen. Jedi Knight and Highwind’s former Padawan and longtime partner. Her name had threaded through the dossier nearly as much as her master’s. Theron had found it a little odd that she was still part of the Defender’s crew this many years after her knighting, but he supposed that saving the galaxy from annihilation on a semi-regular basis formed tight bonds.

“You know what I mean,” Kira continued. “This place… it’s worse than Dromund Kaas. You can feel the Dark Side in every step you take here.”

“We’ll be fine,” Highwind assured her companion. “After all, I have everyone here, as well as eyes and ears on Carrick Station to guide me through.”

“How reassuring.”

“I’ve been told that they have a map.”

“Oh good, a map. That will keep a Sith from stabbing you in the back with a lightsaber.”

Despite himself, Theron found himself having to purse his lips together to keep from smirking. Apparently this Kira had a bit of a mouth on her. This was probably a good moment for him to speak up, to keep from listening in on what was becoming clear had been meant to be a private conversation, but he was curious to see where this was going. 

“I highly doubt anyone will get that close,” came the serene reply, and Theron was pretty sure he heard a snort on the other end of the line.

“That’s some map you’ve got there.”

“I would think you’d know the difference between directions and the Force at this point, Kira.”

“Oh, so you’re not going to use the Force to magically guide you to the Dark Council chambers? Which, lovely vacation spot by the way, Boss. You should always plan our team building exercises. You keep things so exciting.”

“I didn’t plan this particular excursion,” the reply came out only the slightest edge of consternation. “You can thank the military and SIS for this trip.”

“Oh, the SIS, they always take us to the most fun places. Think we’ll have to fight off any Rakata-tech zombies this time?”

“I didn’t ask.”

“Well, what kind of briefing doesn’t mention zombies?”

“Perhaps I should check, if it’s that important.” If Theron’s ears didn’t deceive him, he thought he heard the slightest trace of impatience lacing through that deceptively serene tone. There was a soft beep in his ear as she attempted to establish connection on her side. “Theron, are you there?”

“Yes,” he said, miraculously managing to keep his tone neutral.

“Do you think we’ll encounter any zombies during our stay here?”

“No, I think you’ll be fine,” he said, pursing his lips together to keep from laughing. “You’ll probably just have to deal with an endless horde of angry Sith. No zombies though.”

“I’m sure everyone will rest easier knowing that.”

Darok shot him a look. “I hope you’re taking this seriously, Agent Shan.”

“Bite me,” was what Theron almost said. Instead he just shot the colonel the most sarcasticly polite smile he could muster. “I’m always serious, Darok.”

The colonel narrowed his eyes, face set in a deep frown. For a moment, it almost seemed like he was going to say something, before he turned back to the holodisplay of Korriban.

“I apologize if I caused you any problems,” Highwind said. Her tone was so placid, he honestly couldn’t tell if she was being sincere or sarcastic.

“Nothing to worry about,” he said smoothly, watching as the ship exited hyperspace, and made for a fast and rough landing on the planet’s surface. 

“Who’s Theron?” Kira asked.

The ship shuddered and came to a hard stop on the ground, the echoes of the rough landing sounding over the earpiece. He would have turned the volume on his side down, but he was waiting to hear if the reply contained any mention of the Grand Master, or if Highwind had more discretion than that.

“He’s with the SIS.”

“Oh, really? Is he sure about the zombie thing, because Fauler conveniently left that out on our grand adventure on Tatooine too.”

This time he did hear an exhalation of breath, and it was definitely on the annoyed side. “Have I mentioned that you can stay on the shuttle if you want to?”

On the holocam feed, Highwind’s small figure emerged from the pod, the desert breeze kicking up her cape into the face of the man behind her. He batted it away as she continued to survey the area.

“Hey, gorgeous, you ever think about dressing for the climate?” Ah, that must have been Kimble, the medic.

“I see nothing wrong with the way I’m dressed, Doc,” she said primly, “especially considering what we’re up against.”

“Yeah, about that… are you really serious? Wasn’t that fun trip on Dromund Kaas enough?”

“I’m not forcing anyone to come along. You can all stay on the shuttle if you prefer.”

“Please tell me she’s joking.” Kimble—or rather Doc apparently—seemed to be directing that comment to the rest of the crew emerging from the shuttle.

“Apparently not,” Kira’s voice drifted back.

“You all talk too much.” The imposing figure of a Pureblood Sith strode out from the shuttle, not seeming to notice that Doc had to dodge out of the way. “If you did not wish to come you should have not left Carrick Station.”

“Thank you, Scourge,” Highwind said airily.

“You’re taking his side?”

“No,” her tone sounded a little strained, “but I was the one who agreed to this mission in the middle of our rest time. It’s understandable if you’d rather relax rather than—”

“You are impossible,” Doc’s voice sounded aggrieved. “Please back me up on this, Kira.”

“Okay, I’ll give you that.”

“Master Jedi, if we leave these two here we should achieve a 3.07% increase in efficiency by lack of complaining.”

“No one asked you, Rusk!”

“Welcome to Korriban,” Theron said loudly, feeling a slight thrill of satisfaction when he saw Highwind jump ever so slightly on the holocam feed. “Enjoying the view?”

“Ready to get started,” she said, and he was pretty sure by the way she looked at each member of her crew that she was giving them some sort of silent rebuke. “What’s the situation?”

“Well,” he said casually, “Wave One managed to soften the Imps up some, but there’s still a lot of ground to cover.”

“How far is the Sith Academy?”

“See that big structure off in the distance?”

“You mean the giant pyramid dominating the horizon—yes. It’s a bit hard to miss.”

“That’s where you’re headed. Just… a bit of a walk to get there. You’ll have to cross the Wilds before you enter the Valley of the Dark Lords. And probably a few of said dark lords on the way.”

Theron heard an intake of breath as Kira stepped in closer to her Master. “Those are some unhappy Sith. This isn’t going to be easy.”

“No,” Highwind agreed quietly, “but that hasn’t stopped us before.”

“Good luck,” Theron intoned. “I’ll be in touch.”

He muted his mic, and toned down the volume on her feed so that he could monitor the chatter on this end a little better. Darok watched as Highwind, her crew, as well as their backup squad began to make their way down the cliffside towards the long expanse separating them from the Academy. 

The static view from the holocam wasn’t perfect, but it was the best they could do until the strike team could reach a data node and Theron could get some hooks into the Academy’s systems. Another wave of fighters raced overhead, dropping another round of bombs that kicked up debris and so much dirt into the air the visual was obscured for several long seconds. He heard the hiss of a lightsaber being activated over his auditory feed, and turned it down as it quickly descended into a deafening cacophony as the strike team engaged with resistance on the ground. 

The dust began to clear on their visual feed, revealing the battle raging in the valley below. Their teams were hardly distinguishable specks from the distance, and from the hazy image it was almost impossible to tell their people apart from the enemy. Except for one caped figure, whirling around faster than humanly possible. 

She leapt to and fro, twin violet blades twirling almost as if she were in a dance. She cut through the swathes of enemies as if she were parting water, cape whipping behind her. The rest of her team moved around her in sync, filling in the gaps in each other’s defenses like it had been choreographed beforehand. They quickly gained ground, the commanders of the Imperial ground resistance falling one-by-one. It was almost mesmerizing in its own way.

He didn’t realize he’d been watching quite so intently, or quite so long, until he heard Darok mutter next to him. “You ever seen anything like that?”

Theron had seen Jedi fight, he himself had gone toe-to-toe with members of the Dark Council and lived to tell the tale. But even from a distance, he could tell that what they were witnessing was in a class all of its own. “No.”

“There’s more to that one than first glance.”

For probably the first time since they met, Darok and Theron could agree wholeheartedly on something.

The strike team passed out of view as they ducked through a canyon, and Theron resumed monitoring their progress from one of the GPS on the sketchy Korriban map. A quick visual report from one of Darok’s pilots confirmed more resistance ahead that they were going to have to cut through. Without a visual to back them up, Darok and Theron were both left to monitoring their other various feeds.

He paced the room, listening to the distant echoes of blaster fire and lightsabers clashing over the comm. There was the occasional bit of chatter from her team that drifted through, but Highwind remained quiet other than directing the way or a quick order sent to her crew or Darok’s men that were trailing behind in the path they were forging. 

Theron kept an eye on the chrono, the ever-present countdown to their closing window lurking in the back of his mind. They were making good progress, honestly, faster than he had expected. Although, he wasn’t sure exactly what he had been expecting from all of this, but after witnessing the impressive display of combat skills earlier, it hadn’t been that.

The distinctive hum of her lightsaber disappeared with a swish as she deactivated it, and for a moment, there was almost silence on the other end. The lack of noise itself was almost deafening in its own way. Then there was something soft, like a voice in the distance. Next to him he saw Darok’s normal stony expression descend into a frown, and he dialed up the volume on his feed to listen in.

“We need to keep moving—”

“Your armor—you’re with the Republic aren’t you? Please, you must help us!”

The desperate cry barely registered over the sound of boots crunching on the rocky gravel. It was hard to believe that such a small woman could make so much noise as she was walking. 

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? That’s not why we’re here.” It was the voice of one of Darok’s men, the lieutenant. “We’re not here to hurt you, I promise. Just… try to keep your heads down, all right?”

The heavy footfalls stopped, and he heard Highwind speak. Although it wasn’t with the quiet exasperation she had used with her crew earlier, but the same tone that she had used when she was sizing up Darok earlier. “What’s going on?”

“That’s what I’d like to know,” Darok muttered, clearly irritated with the delay. “Why have you stopped, Bickell?”

“Got a whole mess of slaves here.” The conflict in the lieutenant’s tone was audible even through the earpiece. “As much as I wish we could do something for them, we can’t. There’s no time.”

“There’s always time,” Highwind said without hesitation, conviction ringing clear in her tone.

“But this op is strictly smash-and-grab. We could risk the whole mission if we pull them out!”

“We can’t leave them behind, Lieutenant.”

“But our orders—”

“Are to secure my retreat, which you have done admirably.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“Do whatever it takes—just get them out of here.”

“Shan,” Darok practically snarled, “get a handle on your Jedi! Now.”

Theron glowered at the taller man, for a few long moments thinking of a few ways to knock a little air out of the windbag standing next to him. He managed to wrangle his irritation, as he always did, and shove it deep down as he unmuted his mic.

“Hey there,” he said, the annoyance still simmering just beneath the surface, and possibly leaking into his tone.

“Theron,” she returned, “what’s going on?”

“I was about to ask the same thing. You do remember that this is an extraction mission, not a rescue operation, don’t you?”

“It can be both.”

“And if you send Bickell and the others back, who’s going to secure your retreat?”

“I’ll figure something out,” she said confidently.

He pressed his lips into a thin line as Darok let out a loud snort. Apparently Bickell’s mic was picking up her reply well enough for him to hear. He shut his eyes briefly, gathering the fraying threads of his patience together.

“No one deserves this, Theron,” she said. Although her mic still picked up her voice clearly, from softness in her tone, she had dropped it as if she was trying to talk to just him. “You know how the Empire treats slaves—especially the Sith. Tell me you wouldn’t do the same thing if you were here.”

He wanted to tell her just that, and get her to focus back on the entire point of this mission, on the larger picture. Except that would be a bit hypocritical, considering that he’d nearly gotten his entire career sidelined after accidentally trashing an SIS operation on Nar Shadaa a few years back as he’d refused to let several soldiers be sold into slavery. It had all worked out in the end, but that was beside the point.

“You don’t know me,” he said tersely.

“Tell her that we don’t have time to be rescuing every slave on Korriban,” Darok spat.

Before Theron could even open his mouth to relay the message, her voice filled his ear again, backed with that same steely resolve he was starting to recognize. “I don’t particularly care for the Colonel’s tone.”

Apparently Theron’s mic was more sensitive than he gave it credit for. Perhaps it was possible to tweak equipment a little too well.

“Uh oh,” Doc’s voice drifted through the earpiece, “she’s got that look in her eye.”

“Something tells me I’m glad I’m not hearing what’s going on back on Carrick Station,” Kira agreed.

“You know we can’t spare the men,” Theron finally said.

“Fine.” Her Jedi calm didn’t break, but he could hear the repressed emotion beginning leak into her voice. “We’ll split the difference. My crew will lead them back.”

“Yeah, we’ll—wait, come again?” That was Doc.

“Doc and Rusk will escort them back to the shuttle safely. They’re fully capable.”

“You know it is foolish to split our forces this way, Jedi. Especially over slaves.” The deep tone of Lord Scourge picked up. “There are still many Sith crawling in this valley.”

“These people need our help, Scourge.”

“One day you are going to get us all killed with your pointless compassion.”

“Today will not be that day for you, thankfully, since you’ll be helping them. In case they encounter any of those Sith that you mentioned.”

There was a long silence on the other end, and Theron really wished he had a visual to see exactly what was going down, but even he could feel the tension crackling over the distance. He crossed his arms, and was contemplating breaking the silence when he finally heard a grunt of acknowledgement.

“Hey, gorgeous,” Doc’s voice dropped into Highwind’s, and therefore Theron’s ear, barely a whisper, “do you really think this is wise? Scourge is likely to spear one of them with his lightsaber if they annoy him.”

“That’s why I’m sending you,” she whispered back, “I know you’ll take care of them.”

“I’m always the dashing hero.”

“That’s what I’m counting on.”

“Watch your back in there,” Doc said, the trailing quality of his voice indicating that he was moving away.

“That’s what I’m here for,” Kira called back.

“This distraction has wasted enough of our time.” Darok didn’t exactly snarl, but there was an unrestrained annoyance coloring his tone. “Is she on the way to the Academy, or has she forgotten the reason they’re there?”

“If Colonel Darok wishes to board a shuttle to Korriban and take over this mission personally, he is welcome to,” Highwind said airily. “Otherwise I would suggest that he calm down before he gives himself a stroke.”

Theron felt his lips twitch, and managed to cover the grin with his hand before the burly man next to him saw. It took him an extra moment to smother his mirth completely, and more diplomatically than he ever thought possibly he told Darok, “She’s headed that way now.”

That earned a tight nod before the colonel turned back to his battle plans on the holotable. Theron continued to pace, the only thing he could do to expend his nervous energy. Usually in a situation like this he’d be out there doing his part, not playing games of holophone between Jedi and the military. Stars, he missed field work. 

“Now, Theron, that’s not what I said.” If he didn’t know better, he would have thought that he heard a faint trace of amusement.

He wandered over to the section of the holotable that had the reconstructed plans leading to the temple. He pitched his voice low as he replied, not really wanting Darok to overhear. “I’m trying out some of that famous Jedi diplomacy.”

“There’s a difference between diplomacy and lying.”

“It’s diplomacy if you’re headed that way,” he tossed back. “So don’t make a liar out of me now.”

He was pretty sure he was imagining the sound of a resigned sigh over his earpiece. “Diplomacy it is.”

“Good.” 

Theron enlarged the holographic view of the map, studying the path they would have to weave before even reaching the Academy’s front doors. They still had a long way to go, the numbers on their strike team had just been halved by the impromptu rescue mission, and their window to escape was shrinking by the minute. Hopefully Darok had been right in his assessment earlier and there was more to this Jedi than met the eye. Theron had a feeling she was going to need more than just some very fancy lightsaber skills before all of this was said and done.

Next Chapter

[sasskarian]

Fanfic Authors Tag Game

Tagged by @marblesarelost

AO3 Name: Sasskarian

Fandoms: Lord. Uh. Star Wars (Legends EU and canon, though I tend to cherry pick what I like). Dragon Age. Mass Effect. Elder Scrolls. Crimson Peak (one completed fic, one WIP). Witcher. Arcana game. When the Night Comes. Cosmere/Sanderson works. Mercedes Thomspon. Black Jewels series. Good Omens. Haven.

Number of fics: 27, not including my Scrivner or Drive folders

1. Fic you spent the most time on: At this point, I’d say it’s a toss-up between my Hollywood/Noir/Murder Mystery AU of Dragon Age, Glitterverse, and my Jaal/Ryder romance, Home. 

2. Fic you spent the least time on: Honestly? Probably the Arcana fic I’ve started three times and thrown away every time. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about my Voiceverse fic but not actually writing it. 

3. Longest fic: Technically, my longest fic is a collection of tumblr prompts, totalling 38k. My second longest work but longest proper fic is Glitterverse, at 30k.

4. Shortest fic: He Might Like That, a Mandalorian ficlet. Din reminiscing on how mandokarla Cara Dune is, and Cara being oblivious. 

5. Most hits: Shakarian Smut that’s been under construction for like a year. (I want to rewrite it, I just never... seem... to actually get to it) at 4.2k. Current fic that’s still up would be the kickoff to Home, Come to Me, at just under 4. 

6. Most kudos: Come to Me, at 342

7. Most comment thread: Glitterverse at 48

8. Fave fic you wrote: Oh man. Don’t do this to me. >< How can I choose between my bi disaster hollywood!Hawke (Glitterverse) and my overly-romantic Orlesian au Isera (Fairbanks)

9. Fic you want to rewrite/expand on: There are definitely a few. Like... most of them. Mostly the Shakarian smut-- now that the OT3 of Garrus/Shepard/Thane is my canon-- and I want to expand on the Crimson Peak fic. My girlfriend and I had the great idea of mashing together Crimson Peak and Rivers of London, and having Nate end up associating with Nightingale at some point. 

10. Share a bit of your WIP or share a story idea that you’re planning:

New Fairbanks:

“I’m sorry,” Isera says, blinking slowly at her advisers. “Can you repeat that but… make it make more sense?”

Leiliana sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. “What part of this is difficult to understand, Inquisitor?” Josephine makes a noise somewhere between amusement and resignation, and Isera narrows her eyes at the way Cassandra and Cullen are very carefully not looking at one another. “Your presence is not required at the evening meeting.” 

“My presence,” she says, “is not required? Me? The Inquisitor?” 

“That’s correct.” Cassandra nods once, decisively, as if to say and that’s that. “Your evening is yours to do with as you like.” Something twinkles in her eye, something that suddenly and sharply reminds Isera of the look Varric gets right before he gets into mischief or starts bullshitting in the hopes of distracting her. 

“...you’re up to something,” Isera says, accusingly. “I know you four are up to something.” 

Witcher, with my beloved heart-sister @suspendnodisbelief​:

“Even now, I hear them at the gate, crashing against it to make their way here,” Calanthe announced, and Jaskier quoted verbatim in a recitative cadenza. “You must go now, both of you. Renfri, will you help me guard them as they make their escape?”

“Fight a swarm of all manner of dreadful monsters, alongside a Queen who has matched me cut for blow? Oppose Death itself, and cry our defiance against the endless night?” Renfri’s bladed arms glistened red and wet in the dim tavern light, and the black pits of her eyes sparked hotly with the joyous violence of distant stars. “Why, Calanthe, I thought you’d never ask.” “Jaskier, give Mousesack my order to hold the tavern behind us as long as he can, by any means he can.” Calanthe stretched and limbered open her enormous brazen wings, and the tavern seemed to distort and expand around them all, making room for her. Every feather was a sword, and her lashing tail now more closely resembled a whip tipped with steel teeth, striking embers in the air and sending red cinders flying every time it cracked. 

Jaskier grabbed Geralt’s arm, attempting to pull him along, before realising Geralt still couldn’t detect where he was. For all that Jaskier wasn’t simply passing through Geralt, as though not a solid object, Geralt still seemed impervious to his touch, and pulling on him was like pulling on a mountain in hopes it would budge.

Crimson Peak sequel:

Nate never set out to be a ghost hunter. 

Bollocks, William would say, in that lounging, charmingly-arrogant way that was all flattened vowels and half-swallowed consonants. Your mam and pap bein’ who they’d be, what else could you be, Nathe? 

Glitterverse:

“Anders, if anyone in this group deserves a punch…” Varric trailed off, hands hovering over Hawke’s prone form like he was afraid to touch her. “Hawke, come on. Wake up.” 

His hands finally settled on brushing Hawke’s hair away from her face and Cassandra hissed as she stepped around for a better view: Hawke’s thin wrists were covered in angry red marks, some already darkening to purple. The bruising was grotesque in the stark magelight, no softer than a crime scene tech’s flashlight, and it took Cassandra several blinks to dismiss the intrusive image of Daniel’s bruised, broken face highlighted by a similar harsh light months and months ago. 

Distantly, a door opened and the chattering of the party drifted down the hall for a moment, a reminder of where they were. “We need to go,” Cassandra said, armoring her heart back in her training, stopping the sideways slide from sorrow over Daniel to Hawke with brutal pragmatism. Mourning and memories were luxuries she couldn’t afford right now; there would be time for falling apart once they were safe. “Either she wakes or someone carries her, but Bartrand will kill us if we don’t get out.” 

When neither man moved, just stared at their friend so pale in the dark, Cassandra hissed again. “Tethras, move your ass!” 

Shakarios:

There are a few days, Garrus marvels, when the universe is still able to surprise him. Usually it’s in bad ways, like a thug having more firepower, or Grunt’s grenades having a dud at the wrong moment. Having Cerberus drones appear out of goddamn nowhere.

This moment, though, where the artificial sunrise of the Citadel skims pale fingers over the curve of Shepard’s waist, gentle and lovely on the freckles and scars life has left on her, is glorious. Thane’s dark eyes blink at him sleepily from the other side of their Commander, mouth already curved in invitation. “How long’ve you been ‘wake?” Garrus asks through a yawn. 

“A while,” is the soft reply. “It is a rare pleasure to see her at peace.” Delicately-scaled green fingers reach for his own, stroking with what Io would call intent. Garrus’ throat flushes, heat crawling up from his chest, at the memory of just what those soft fingers can do.

Tagging, no pressure: @aban-asaara​ @systlin​ @shetanshadowwolf​ @thebisexualmandalorian​

[quarterfromcanon]

1-4. For the asks

Thank you so much for sending these! <3 

Once I started to answer them, I realized there were comparatively few recent television shows appearing on the list. I seemed to keep gravitating toward older ones I remembered from years ago. I took a handful of days to mull it over in case I was forgetting something, but nothing else comes to mind. Maybe my ongoing list of Shows to Watch During Quarantine will turn up some fresh results but, for now, it looks like I’ll be taking a little trip down memory lane. :) 

This turned out to be a pretty long and rambly post, so I’ll stow it under the cut!

Top 5 TV Shows 

1. Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - I can’t imagine this surprises anyone who has been following this blog for the past two years or so. It brought fellow fans into my life, got me back into writing fic, and prompted countless tags of meta. It’s the show my mind drifts to on a weekly basis (if not daily) even a full year after the finale. Just when it seemed I’d reached an age where that level of intense fandom involvement and character attachment might be fading, it proved that quite the opposite was true. I’m very thankful to the series for that, and for the people whose paths have crossed mine as a result.   

2. Schitt’s Creek - This is my #1 Feel Good show and, though I’ve been dodging spoilers for the final season until it gets uploaded to Netflix, I get the impression that it will remain in that top spot. The world feels softer and more hopeful there. It’s healing for my soul. I’m going to have a dreadfully difficult time saying goodbye, but I’m glad there are six season to revisit whenever I want. 

3. Stranger Things - The theme song alone sends such a rush of excitement through me. I love the aesthetic and the atmosphere. I sometimes have mixed feelings about the romances but the FRIENDSHIPS sure do have a direct line to my heartstrings. I think the way they’ve combined media influences into their own story is really neat. You get something that’s new and engaging, but you can also go back and enjoy the sources of inspiration with fresh appreciation. 

4. Joan of Arcadia - I can’t help it. The snark, the jackets, the early 2000s songs, the performances -- the nostalgia for this show is so strong. It’s not without its problems, but it did have some really good things to offer as well. I remember an episode that was one of my earliest introductions to the concept of a trigger, and the effect it could have on a person if exposed to one of theirs. The series dealt a lot with grief and the many forms it can take (I STILL can’t hear Fiona Apple’s cover of “Across the Universe” without getting misty-eyed). I’m also surprised, looking back, at the somewhat positive way I recall them discussing homosexuality on the several occasions that it came up in the show. Not to give too much credit since I don’t think there were recurring canonically LGBTQIA+ characters but, for a kid who spent most days around closed-minded people of a certain religious leaning, it was meaningful along my individual journey. I’d like to provide the several examples that are most vivid in my memory:

A. A girl with short hair, short nails, little to no makeup, and a bulky leather jacket is generally assumed to be a lesbian by the bullies at school. The show directly confronts the fact that “gay” should not be used an insult, that identity should not be assumed without the person telling you so, AND makes sure that the character in question never pushes back by saying harmful things about lesbians despite not actually being one herself. 

B. A boy who is questioning is able to confide in his big brother and have a fairly calm conversation about it; the awkwardness mostly comes from neither of them being accustomed to openly discussing emotions, not from the possibility of a negative response regarding the subject matter. 

C. Another character is accidentally discovered to be gay (he only appears in the one episode, if my memory serves), and some of the leads have the opportunity to share that for personal gain. However, even though he is a popular jock who is a bit of a jerk in the hallways, the show makes it clear that the right choice is still to leave the telling of that information up to him and him alone. 

Like I mentioned, it can’t be said that representation was in abundance here - for instance, I don’t believe anything other than straight or gay was presented as a possibility - but any accepting acknowledgement in a faith-centric series was something for me to hold on to in my still-deeply-closeted days. As a final Very Important personal side note, this show brought Judith Montgomery into my life (pictured below on the left), and that feels like it merits a shoutout for being what I consider a rather significant marker in my awakening. 

THE OVERWHELMING CRUSH I HAD - and still have - is one for the books. 

5. Pushing Daisies - This is another show with an aesthetic I adore. The series has such a fun, whimsical energy. The crime-solving! The clothes! The cast! There's a lot to love. It’s the kind of world I wish I could visit... well, minus the evidently rampant murder rate. 

Top 5 Overrated TV Shows

1. Once Upon A Time - *deep sigh* I tried to stick with it for so long. I think I’ve seen five out of the seven seasons in their entirety. It just felt like everything got mired down by excessive (and increasingly convoluted) subplots, often for the purpose of tossing in as many fairytale and/or Disney characters as possible. Plus, quite honestly, there was too much emphasis on romantic love. For a show whose first season involved a curse being broken by [potential spoiler, I suppose] a mother kissing her son’s forehead, I ultimately found myself up to my ears in romantic ships. It reached such a stifling extent that, if you were not particularly attached to those pairings, there wasn’t a whole lot else to entice further viewing. 

2. Under the Dome - I don’t know for certain what the general public opinion of this series was, but it felt like the commercials always featured alleged rave reviews, so I figured I could include it here. I was vaguely interested in Season 1, mainly as a fan of Rachelle Lefevre’s work. Season 2 pulled me in with the introduction of a new townsperson and I threw WAY too much of my heart into that attachment, which backfired when that character was killed. I made quite the spectacle of my heartbreak, so much so that my family doesn’t let me mention this show around them anymore. :P Season 3 was, to phrase it delicately, not a great time. The series did introduce me to a few new-to-me actors, though, so that was cool. 

3. Bates Motel - Even the incentive of learning that the two characters I liked most share a lot of screen time later in the series hasn’t been enough to call me back to this one. I don’t know if it was the pacing that put me off or what, but the prospect of finishing the remaining seasons feels so daunting. There are evidently five seasons in total and I believe I’ve only seen two of them thus far. I will probably muddle through it someday just to see how it goes, but the fact that I am so disinclined to prioritize it made this feel like a fair addition to the list. 

4. Lost - My interest in this series unfortunately waned right before fervent fandom spiked. I don’t have any specific complaints that come to mind about what I saw; I just sort of drifted and then stayed away. Teachers I liked and peers I spent time with were starting to latch on to the show and I couldn’t find even the slightest inclination to give it a second try. However, did I still dutifully read all the latest installments in my friend’s Sawyer Ford and Kate Austen fanfiction when she passed me handwritten copies at lunch? Sure. I was glad it made her happy, even if I was no longer a viewer. 

5. Hemlock Grove - I say this as someone who still mourns the fates of some characters in this show, so I wouldn’t go so far as to claim that the series stopped being able to make me feel anything. I’m just of the opinion that, in some ways, it might’ve been better off stopping at one season. That’s where the book it was based on ends, and things just didn’t feel as cohesive after that. Season 3 especially was - borrowing from my above review of Under the Dome - not a great time. That being said, there are also certain elements from the book that I could’ve done without in the Season 1 adaptation but... well... here we are. 

Top 5 Underrated TV Shows

1. Picnic at Hanging Rock - Another one that won’t surprise followers of this blog. I have rhapsodized about it quite frequently since I found it a little over a month ago. It’s a period piece mystery miniseries with LGBTQIA+ representation, gorgeous costumes, and Samara Weaving. This felt specifically designed to wedge its way into my heart, and I’m quite content with the space it now occupies.

2. Dark - I’m so intrigued by the overlapping timelines with all of the morally gray characters. It’s possible to like one of these people in the timeline where they’re young but dislike them as adults, or vice versa. It also makes me think of Rant by Chuck Palahniuk a little tiny bit with the idea that time travel, specifically tampering with your own timeline, might make you physically and behaviorally unrecognizable to yourself. And the SONG CHOICES! I have gotten some solid new music selections from this series. 

3. Sense8 - I still need to watch the finale. I really do. But I knew it would make me sad so I’ve avoided it for... two years now? Pretty close, I think. The concept is fascinating and the cast is so strong. Plus the cinematography! They came up with some of the coolest ways to depict the link these characters share and what it’s like when they connect over distance. The planning and careful editing it all must’ve taken... I remain in awe. 

4. Penny Dreadful - There were definitely some story/writing choices I didn’t particularly like along the way, but I did get engrossed in the creepy goodness and the performances -- Eva Green’s Vanessa Ives most of all. It left me wishing for more period piece “monster mash” stories, because having all those classic characters in one place was a blast. It also helped me understand why Helen McCrory was once slated to play Bellatrix Lestrange because she can be terrifying. Oh and Sarah Greene in her Wild West outfits? Perdita Weeks with short red hair in fencing garb, and later in all leather with boots and a long jacket? I WAS NOT PREPARED AND I HAVE STILL NOT RECOVERED. I NEVER WILL.

5. Wonderfalls - There’s some cringe-inducing handling of certain representation in the series, but I have such a weak spot for quippy outcasts who become reluctant chosen ones (Joan Girardi in Joan of Arcadia, Wynonna Earp, Jaye Tyler in this series, et cetera). I also really love the sibling dynamics here. They bicker, tease one another, help each other out of trouble, and have rare but genuine heart-to-hearts. Caroline, Lee, and Katie all did such a great job blending their characters’ adult personalities with certain childhood attributes that rise to the surface in the presence of family.  

Top 5 Movies

1. Addams Family Values - I’ve rewatched this movie at least once annually since I found it in Media Play at age 13. Usually, I’ll play it around Halloween or, at the latest, Thanksgiving. It’s mouth-along-with-every-line level ingrained in my memory. I find myself leaning forward in my seat before favorite parts because I’m still that excited to relive them. Why this movie, and why this devotion to such a degree? It’s hard to explain, even to myself. I can tell you, however, that I hold up every other portrayal of the Addams characters to the versions found in this. Everybody in the cast just feels that perfect for their part. 

2. Clue - I was already pretty fond of this movie to begin with, but then my sister got older and claimed it as a favorite of her own, so now she just supplies me with further excuses to watch it repeatedly. It’s also been a bonding piece of media with a couple of close friends and such through the years. It’s incredible to think not everyone in it was the first choice for their roles; what everybody brings to the table is so top-notch that I wouldn’t have it any other way. I also LOVE knowing that it originally went to theaters with different endings depending on which showing you attended. I gather people weren’t terribly thrilled with the stunt back then, but I kinda think some moviegoers would be into that approach these days? Then again, one hit that tried something different tends to start a fad, so maybe I’d end up regretting the suggestion after a while. :P

3. The Craft - This. Movie. Yes, Act III is a major bummer even though I know it’s coming, and I’ll always wish it ended differently. Even so. This. Movie. I tend to headcanon mostly for shows and sometimes books, but The Craft is a beloved exception. I love so much about it: the magic, the music, the clothes, the settings, the dynamics within the friend group, the performances. I had no idea when I first got the DVD at 17 that it would become such a part of my life, but I’m so glad it found its way to me. 

4. Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion - The soundtrack is a glorious ’80s and ’90s treat for my ears. The colorful costumes are perfectly suited to the main characters’ version of the world. There are so many great lines and it feels like everyone is having a lot of fun in their roles. I LOVE HEATHER MOONEY SO MUCH. She’s my awful, scathingly sarcastic, little grungy grump and she fills my heart with joy. 

5. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King - I was pretty sure at least one of the three had to appear on here. I think, if I were to tally them all up, The Return of the King features most of my favorite moments, so it wins the spot. “I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you!”, ‘Edge of Night,’ Éowyn in battle, The Army of the Dead, ‘Into the West’... I end up crying during the end credits every time. So, yeah, ultimately, I would choose the third part of the trilogy if I could only watch one. 

Phew, that’s it! All the questions answered, all the shows and movies listed! Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read it all, and thanks again to @monaiargancoconutsoy for sending in the prompts! <3

[shipmistress9]

FTLOAP: Chapter 45: The Time Will Come When You'll Have To Rise

Fandom: HTTYD

Theme: Hiccstrid - Medieval-style AU - Romance - Angst/Hurt/Comfort

Summary: Reduced to little more than a stable boy, Hiccup, despite his noble birth, has few prospects for more in life. But when he meets a girl who came to look at the horses, being a stable boy might not be enough anymore. Together, they have tough choices to make and great risks to navigate if they want to survive and be together.

Rating: Explicit

FF-net  -  AO3 -

Discord-server for discussions and questions

Part 1: Prologue; Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3; Chapter 4; Chapter 5; Chapter 6; Chapter 7; Chapter 8; Chapter 9; Chapter 10; Chapter 11;

Part 2: Chapter 12; Chapter 13; Chapter 14; Interlude 1; Chapter 15; Chapter 16; Chapter 17; Chapter 18; Chapter 19; Chapter 20; Chapter 21; Chapter 22; Chapter 23; Chapter 24; Chapter 25; Chapter 26; Interlude 2; Chapter 27: Chapter 28 ; Chapter 29 ; Chapter 30; Chapter 31; Chapter 32; Interlude 3; Bonus 1; Chapter 33

Part 3: Chapter 34; Chapter 35; Chapter 36; Interlude 4; Chapter 37; Chapter 38; Chapter 39; Chapter 40; Interlude 5; Chapter 41; Chapter 42; Chapter 43; Chapter 44

Alpha/Co-author: @athingofvikings

tagging @drchee5e @hey-its-laura-again @thepixiedustfactory

. – * – _ . o O o . _ – * – .

AN: Woohoo! I actually managed another chapter, hard to believe, I know...

I think at this point, it would be more sensible to remove any scheduled updates, and I just post the next chapter when it's done. Fair warning though: November is fast approaching now and with it NaNoWriMo. I'm not going to participate in that this year, but my alpha-reader does. So I don't know how much time he'll have for editing and helping. And after NaNo, I'm very close to my delivery date already, so no promises about updates then, either. However, I solidly plan to at least post one more chapter before that! Afterwards, I don't know how quickly I will get back to writing. If you have questions though, you can always contact me through PM here or through the ATOV Discord server. And without a regular update schedule, I now have a tagging list here, so if you want to get included there, just tell me. 😊

I feel positive about this other update because a good part of it is already written as I'd originally planned to have that scene in this chapter. But as it is, the chapter got pretty long already so I split it again. This time, the ending feels much more solid than the last time I had to do that, and I hope it feels that way for you, too.

This week's title comes from the song Warriors again by Imagine Dragons. After splitting the chapter, I again had to come up with a new title, and after a bit of thinking, this one felt exceedingly fitting. 😇

. o O o .

Throughout the following few days, Astrid kept pondering over it all; Eret’s accident and everything that had happened afterwards. It wasn’t entirely by choice; she much rather would have thought about Hiccup and how they could be together instead. But she was at a loss there, only having Hiccup’s renewed optimism to hold on to, and repeatedly going through the same pointless plans wasn’t exactly productive. Thinking about other problems instead wasn’t necessarily more pleasant, but it was still… easier.

And thinking about those incidents certainly had a grounding effect. The more she mentally reviewed the attempted stab in the back against Eret, the more certain she was about one thing – from the fierceness and aim of his attack, the now-dead nobleman had intended for it to be a killing blow. It was a hot topic of gossip among the nobles, with many supporting her opinion – without her ever having stated it openly – and being outraged on her and her future husband’s behalf, aided by more witnesses speaking up about their view of the man’s dishonourable attack. Tournament or not, melee or not, stabbing a man in the back was seen as low and cowardly. Some had even called for action against the man’s family, such as fines or other punishments. But as he was already dead, the King had dismissed the idea, saying that they’d been punished enough. However, the entire topic, with the number of witnesses essentially corroborating Astrid’s opinion, was enough that even Eret and Dagur had to admit that it probably hadn’t been an accident at all. 

At first, accepting that fact had made especially Dagur’s anger at Snotlout grow even hotter, though not for long. Snot hadn’t gotten through that fight unscathed either, despite initial impressions. The hit against his head had caused a mild concussion, and the kick to his side had cracked a rib. If he’d lost on purpose somehow, then he’d made an incredibly bad bargain. 

Both Eret and Snot had been confined to bed rest on the healers’ orders for the following few days, making Astrid anxious for both of her brothers. No matter how irritating Snot’s behaviour lately had been, she still cared for him. But now, two days later, Master Mulch had been willing to state that he was relatively certain that both ducal heirs would fully recover. Eret had even insisted on riding out for today’s hunt again; not to actually participate, but at least to show that he was recovering, that he was still there and the place at her side not vacant again.

And no matter how much Astrid – and practically everybody else – had scolded him for this unnecessary show of bravado, she was also grateful for it. Eret could be pretty foolhardy, she knew that perfectly well. But she also knew that he wouldn’t risk his health and life for something as superficial as this. No, she trusted in him, in his assurance that he was doing fine, and let it soothe her enough not to worry about his injury too much. His safety was another matter altogether, but there was little she could do about that. Right now, he was out in the forest, accompanied by Hiccup and Dagur, and probably with a few of her father’s guards keeping a close eye on him, too. That would have to be enough. 

Sighing, she turned the next corner. For once, she had nothing to do; with her suitors being out on that hunt and with her governess being done lecturing her for today, she was at loose ends, for a little while at least. But as there wasn’t enough time to go anywhere, she’d opted for a stroll through the castle instead, with Timothy walking a couple of steps behind her. 

Well, there was one place she could go, and if things were different, she would have gone to visit Fishlegs as soon as her governess had let her leave. But of course, that wasn’t an option these days. Just thinking about Heather made a bunch of twisted emotions rise inside Astrid. There was the fear that she might expose them, despite her declaration that she would keep their secret. She’d made it clear, after all: she didn’t feel any fealty to them, not when their actions might threaten her own little family. And no matter how much Astrid tried to avoid that thought; she was acutely aware of the fact that, if Hiccup wasn’t a consideration, she probably would have married Eret without question – and thus make Dagur more inclined to focus on his role as ducal heir as well. 

But beneath that fear, she could also relate to Heather. The threat of having the future she’d been so sure of ripped away from her, of losing those she loved, and being ready to do everything to keep them… yes, she could sympathise with that all too well. She just hoped that it wouldn’t come to that, that Heather wouldn’t feel threatened enough to take actions against her relationship with Hiccup. Because Astrid wasn’t sure what she’d do then, was even afraid of how far she might be willing to go. 

If only they would be able to come up with something of a plan, some way to achieve their goal without tearing anyone else down with them. She just wanted to be with Hiccup, to be able to love him in peace and spend her life with him. Was that really too much to ask for? 

To soothe her anxiety at least a little, she pressed her hand to her chest, focusing on and basking in the warm glow of Hiccup’s soul. They would find a way! Somehow… Maybe running away really wasn’t an option, but that didn’t mean that there couldn’t be other ways. 

With her hand still resting over her heart, she paused at one of the high windows and gazed out over the land around the castle. It was beautiful, with the lake to her left, the edges of the forest in the distance, and grassland in-between, littered with solitary trees and shrubs here and there. It was still early in the year, but it was obvious that spring was coming quickly now, trees and bushes showing first signs of green and some early flowers growing everywhere. 

Yes, it was beautiful… But that didn’t change that it was nothing but a cage, binding and suffocating her. 

She was about to turn away when a bit of movement caught her eye. There, on a meadow to the right, a handful of horses pranced over the grass and chased each other around. Some grooms were there, too, watching over the animals, all clearly enjoying the sunlight. 

The sight gave Astrid a painful sting. Usually, visiting the stables on a day like this would be an option too, but… but not yet. Someday, she certainly would have the strength to enter the stables again. She was even looking forward to riding and generally being around horses again. But for now, the pain of losing Markor was still too strong. It had all happened so fast. In one moment, everything had been as usual and in the next, he’d just been… gone. She missed him with a dull ache in her chest, one that only worsened when she remembered how she hadn’t even been able to say goodbye in any way and had no way of remembering or mourning him. 

Except… that wasn’t really true, was it? she mused with something of a grimace. She still had the statue Hiccup had given her as a Midwinter gift. As a reminder, he’d said... Her lips twitched into a sad smile as she contemplated the irony. He’d meant that it would be a reminder of him for when he couldn’t be with her, and not of the horse it depicted. But somehow, she felt like this was the perfect way to remember Markor: frozen yet so alive in this tiny figurine – as if he was about to turn and run around at any moment. The thought made a lump rise in her throat, but she managed to keep any tears at bay. She would miss him, would always remember him. But no matter how pointless his death had been, endlessly crying over his fate wouldn’t revive him, either.

Tearing her thoughts away from that path, they inevitably landed where she hadn’t wanted them instead. It wasn’t even farfetched, her mind quickly drawing the connection between Markor and Hiccup, of him giving her that figurine, of the nights she’d spend in the stables, so comfortable and optimistic about their future. She still trusted in the Gods, or whatever force had woven their fates together, but even that didn’t really help when faced with the hopelessness brought by rejecting one impossible idea after the other. 

Maybe Dagur and Eret had been right after all and approaching Daniel with a request for help might work. But even though he certainly had been fond enough of Hiccup during the winter, Astrid wasn’t sure whether she could rely on just that flimsy hope, especially as he wasn’t to return for at least another week anyway. That would be hitting awfully close to when it would be too late… 

She also was aware of a certain piece of parchment that was still safely stored away in her new treasure box. She was ready to use her father’s boon for this; they would probably need every bit of help they could get. But without a plan, she was afraid of revealing her feelings to the King. She just couldn’t predict how he would react. All she knew was that simply ‘requesting to marry Hiccup’ wouldn’t work. The King had made it clear that his announcement of her marrying one of the eligible noblemen currently courting her wasn’t something he could or would take back. And ‘giving Hiccup land and title’ was equally hopeless. Because Hiccup had been right, there was no land even the King could easily give away just like that. 

It all seemed overwhelmingly hopeless, but she had to have faith, had to trust that they would find a way. Eventually…

Later, Astrid would be sure that what happened next had to have been the Gods who guided her steps. Meeting the Grand Dukes Oswald and Eret II in the vast labyrinth that was the castle’s corridors couldn’t have been just a coincidence – the timing was too perfect.

At first, she only heard a familiar voice from around a corner, one that made her feel a little more at ease in an instant, thanks to her mind associating it with enjoyable vacations in the South and days spent at Southshore’s sunny beaches. The voice spoke quietly, but as soon as she focused, the words became easily understandable. 

“...just received a letter from Lord Gregson. Apparently, it is as I feared.”

“That’s unfortunate,” came Eret II’s muttered reply. “What exactly did he– Oh, hello Astrid,” he interrupted himself as she stepped into view, a fond smile spreading across his weathered face at her sight. “How are you, lass? Are you bored to death by all these tournaments and suitors yet?”

Astrid’s face twisted, unsure how to react to that. Of course, Uncle Eret knew her well enough to know that she didn’t exactly enjoy all this fuss, just like she in return knew that he wasn’t any better when it came to overly formal events. But on the other hand, he’d been in on this plan, so it felt a little two-faced for him to complain about them now. Either way, she couldn’t ignore the fatherly smile on his face and not the usual sense of ease it gave her either. And it again reminded her of how, under different circumstances, she’d be about to join his House, his family, and do so happily. 

“You know me too well,” she played along, plastering an indulgent smile on her lips. “I’m just glad it’ll all be over soon.”

“Aye, it certainly will be,” Oswald agreed with a light snort. Beneath his own smile, he seemed troubled though, making Astrid wonder what the men had been talking about before she’d interrupted them. 

Cocking her head, she tried to look as innocent as possible. “But enough of that. What was it you were talking about just now? It seems to bother you, is anything the matter?” She wasn’t even sure what kind of answer she expected. But asking couldn’t hurt, right?

“Oh, that,” Oswald waved her off with a forced smile. “That’s just politics. Believe me, you wouldn’t be interested in this, lass. If you really think tournaments are boring, be glad that it’s not on you to deal with such things, too.”

Astrid had to bite back any comment on that. It was so typical that the men wouldn’t tell her anything.

Eret II grunted in agreement and shook his head. “Yeah, this really is nothing you need to be concerned about. But it’s good that we met here. I wanted to ask whether my son is already settled in his new rooms. I hardly get the chance to talk to him these days, he’s always so busy.” He chuckled and winked at her. 

Because of… reasons, Eret had been made to relocate into other rooms, reasons that made her have to hide a smirk. “As far as I know, he’s relocating today,” she replied as calmly as she could. “A group of servants should be transferring his belongings to the new room as we speak. At least I’m supposed to meet him there for a private dinner later – with a whole entourage of chaperons, of course.” She forced something of an amused grimace onto her face, hoping that it was an appropriate reaction. Deep down, she was glad over this development, though. With having made her unofficial choice at the ball came a few privileges that certainly were to her liking. Like being allowed to spend time with her future husband in a more private setting, with only her warder or maidservant and Sir Eret’s squire as chaperons.

Apparently, her reaction had been what the men had expected from her as they both chuckled fondly at her comment. Even Timothy behind her couldn’t stay completely quiet, covering up his laughter as coughing. Of course, his amusement had an altogether different reason, but that was something the Grand Dukes didn’t need to know about. 

“That sounds about right,” Eret II eventually commented, sobering up again. “Then we better not delay you, wherever you were heading to. See you soon.”

The men nodded at her with something of an insinuated bow – more of a polite nod with a bit of a bend at the waist – which Astrid dutifully returned with a curtsy of her own before she took the obvious dismissal and continued on her way. The fact that she’d again been excluded from any political knowledge bugged her though, so when she reached another junction only a few steps further down the corridor, she went there, giving the Grand Dukes a last friendly smile as she turned around the corner. As soon as she was out of sight though, she made a step to the side to hide in a doorway, indicating Tuff to be quiet and follow her lead. Maybe, just maybe, she could learn something about the political situation of the Kingdom after all. 

And for once, she couldn’t believe her luck.

“So, what was it Lord Gregson wrote to you in that letter?” Eret II said, picking up their conversation.

There was a low, unamused snort from Oswald. “Basically, that he’s giving up. He used so many fancy words that I think he asked one of Frigga’s Gythias to help him compose it. All of these wonderful, florid turns-of-phrase, on and on. About how honoured he felt that we put such trust into him and how he’d wanted to give his best to live up to these expectations and so forth.”

“Aye, I know the type of report,” Eret II said. “I think I’ve even written a few in my time, back when we were younger.”

“I know. I helped, remember? But you were drunk at the time, so I’m not surprised that you don’t,” Oswald said tartly but fondly. The pair of them walked past the doorway, and Astrid gave Tuff a look of dire threat if he so much as blinked loudly. Outside, Oswald continued. “But it all boils down to the fact that he doesn’t feel up to the task of rebuilding County Ravenledge. And at this point, it doesn’t even matter whether it’s because he feels as if the people there deserve better after all they’ve been through or whether he just realised how much work that would be and is too lazy to stand his ground under such circumstances. At least he’s honest enough to admit that he doesn’t feel up to the challenge. But that means that we have to find someone else to take it on, and I fear that the reasons for Lord Gregson’s pull-out will become publicly known sooner rather than later. Which also means that in a week or two, it’ll become increasingly difficult to find a replacement. Everyone is hungry for titles, yes, but that’s because they’re all spoiled brats who want to live like, well, nobles, not have to work with me looking over their shoulder.” 

"Yes, I see your problem," came Eret II’s reply, his voice getting lower and lower as the distance between Astrid and the Grand Dukes grew. "I wish we could spare Osmond this problem in addition to everything else, but he has to know about it."

"No doubts about that. But maybe, this can even come in handy." Oswald laughed harshly. "Although, while it would make for a great white elephant, it’s getting the poor sap to accept it that’ll be the tricky part. We…"

The voices grew too low for Astrid to understand more, but she felt as if she'd heard enough anyway. Stunned, she stood in her doorway and stared at Tuff, unsure whether she was ready to believe what she'd just heard. But in his eyes, she spotted the same excited gleam that was buzzing in her mind as well, and tentatively, she let hope take roots inside her.

County Ravenledge… the name alone was enough to make her cringe at the reminder of Harold, of his foul breath on her skin and his filthy hands on her body. But he was the past and that wasn't what truly was on her mind anyway. 

The man her father and the Grand Dukes had instituted as new Count Ravenledge had resigned his office. And now, it was back in the hands of the Crown, free to be distributed to whoever was deemed fit or worthy of the job.

Astrid's heart was pounding rapidly against her ribs and she was incredibly glad for the hard wood in her back keeping her upright. This was it! This was what they'd been looking for, the solution to their problem, the way out. If Hiccup became the new Count Ravenledge, then he definitely would be of a high-enough rank for her to marry him. Nobody would dare to object to such a choice.

"I assume you want to meet with Eret as soon as possible?" Tuff needlessly asked, emphasising the name to let her know that he knew who she really wanted to see. Astrid could only nod, her mind whirling with countless possibilities. "Then I suggest we return to your rooms and Ruff and I see whether we can help to get his new rooms ready. The sooner you all can talk this through the better.” 

. o O o .

The reason why Eret had to move into other rooms was the source of a wide range of emotions to Astrid. It had all started with some whispered mutterings on the morning after the ball, whispers Astrid herself hadn’t learned about until a day later. Apparently, some people thought it was inappropriate for Eret, the soon-to-be-but-not-yet-husband of the Princess, to spend his nights in such close proximity to her. After all, he inhabited an entire suite of rooms in the family wing of the castle, only separated from his future wife by three corridors. Why, behind two sets of thick oak doors, all sorts of... things could happen in his bedroom!

Yesterday, when Astrid finally had heard them from Eret, she’d initially laughed before another thought had struck her, making her irritation smoulder. Apparently, people were serious about the insinuations against Eret’s character. Eret had slept in that suite for months now, ever since he’d arrived in the capital last fall. And back then, people had already believed them to be a ‘couple’, and had for years. But now it was a problem? Just when things were heating up to the point that Eret was surviving attempts on his life? 

It was an obvious smear campaign, and her fury had started to kindle– 

–Only to vanish like smoke in a high wind when Tuff had burst out laughing at her indignation and Ruff had, after fighting her own mirth, explained that she and her brother had started the whispers. But even this confusion – and granted, Eret’s and Dagur’s as well – hadn’t lasted long. 

The rumours and public demands for decency had apparently all been part of their plan; a few comments down in the kitchens and washer-rooms and elsewhere had spread like a wildfire on open grasslands. With the castle still being unusually packed from the celebrations, there weren’t exactly many other places for Eret – and Hiccup – to move to. House Jag’r’s townhouse certainly was an option, but with Eret still healing and having to participate in the events again as soon as he was recovered, it was more sensible for him to stay at the castle. So, after some discussions – discussions in which the twins were included, in their positions as Eret’s apparent-betrothed’s personal servants – it was decided that Eret would relocate to the so-called haunted rooms. 

At that, Eret had merely raised an eyebrow, and Dagur had made an encouraging gesture, all of them waiting for Ruff to continue in her explanation. 

“The ‘haunted rooms’ are what the staff call the Greatpine Suite,” Ruff explained. “Two floors down from Astrid’s suite and on the other end of the building. Everyone thinks that they’re haunted because there’s this eerie whistling that everyone who stays there hears.” She met Eret’s eyes with a smirk. “So you’ll trade with the men currently barracked there; they’ll be happy to get out, even though your current suite is smaller. But surely a brave knight like Sir Eret of House Jag’r won’t mind, right?”

Laid out in his sickbed, Eret gave her a dubious look that made the twins burst out in even more laughter. Slapping her knee, Ruff gasped, “Don’t worry, there’s no draugr buried under the floorboards or anything else that people say about the rooms.”

“In fact, be honoured that we’re telling you,” Tuff snickered. “Because it’s a secret.”

“What is?” Astrid demanded.

“Why, the secret passage, of course!” Ruff said innocently.

Astrid blinked. “Secret passage?”

“Yup. The one that ends behind that particularly warty painting around the corner from your rooms, Princess,” Tuff said cheerfully. “It was probably meant to be an easy escape route in case of an attack, but hardly anyone knows about them by now.” 

Astrid gave another blink as Eret protested. “But you two can’t be the only ones that know about them. Secret or no secret, it’s really hard to hide a whole passageway, even in a building this big. Someone else will make the connection and complain – and it’s too big a risk to use them, if the servants use them, too!”

“But the servants don’t use them,” Ruff emphasised.

“Present company excepted,” Tuff corrected, grinning. “They’re too small,” he mimed a space only a bit wider than his shoulders and lower than his head, “and filled with cobwebs and... gunk.”

Astrid rolled her eyes. “And you use them for prank getaways?”

“Milady!” Ruff exclaimed, faux-scandalized. “Such accusations!” She smirked and said, “Besides, even the ones that do know...” She shrugged and looked at Astrid and Eret. “They’re all caught up in the romance of it all. I know at least one cook gave me a wink when I made the suggestion.” Spreading her hands out helplessly, she looked between the two of them. “They know what’s up and are rooting for you two.”

“Greaaat,” Hiccup drawled. 

“It is, because it means that we can smuggle you in without a problem,” Tuff said, crossing his arms. “So say ‘thank you.’”

They had thanked the twins for their work. And now, two days later, all Astrid felt was a deep sense of gratitude and a good amount of anticipation, giddiness, and nervousness. If everything went as planned, Hiccup would spend this night with her again, and in her bed no less! Oh, if only it was that late already! She couldn’t wait to feel his hands on her body again, to kiss him and to lose herself in his touch.

But it was only mid-afternoon, with Astrid sitting at her decorated tea table, drinking tea, and nibbling at some light pastries as she waited for the hunting parties to return and for her private dinner with Eret to begin. And before she could enjoy feeling Hiccup’s closeness again, there was something else she had to do anyway.

Aside from making sure that they’d all made it back unharmed and wanting to be close to Hiccup again, she also couldn’t wait to tell them about the conversation she’d overheard. A part of her warned her to be cautious, to not get too excited yet. The idea of Hiccup becoming a full Count in only a few days, of him legally joining those participating in the tournaments and hunts to court her… it felt too good to be true. 

Nervously tapping her fingers against the porcelain cup between her hands, she tried to imagine the reactions to her officially and openly changing her mind and choosing Hiccup instead of Eret. Would it be possible for her to ask her father to excuse Hiccup from participating in any fights, just to keep him safe? After what had happened to Eret, that certainly wasn’t an unreasonable concern, right? But would the King even support such a request? Would he support her choice at all? Or would it be better if she only made her choice public at the very last moment, not giving anyone even the slightest chance to take action against Hiccup? 

For hours, her mind circled around those same thoughts, over and over, until a knock on her door drew her attention. Astrid heard a servant girl delivering a message to Ruff and it made her heartbeat quicken almost unbearably. 

“Are they back?” she asked as soon as Ruff approached her and got up from her seat, unable to sit still any longer. 

Her maidservant smirked. “Yes, they’re all back, unharmed, and Sir Eret awaits you for your dinner in about half an hour,” she replied in a ridiculously formal voice. Astrid’s lips twitched but she didn’t say anything and simply let Ruff dress her for the occasion, waiting impatiently for her to be done. 

Walking along the corridors and down the stairs to Eret’s new rooms seemed to take forever. She knew that this distance served a purpose, one she supported wholeheartedly, but right now, the prolonged walk was driving her insane in her impatience. Eventually, Tuff halted in his strides though and turned to knock on a door to their right. As Eret’s only servant, it was Hiccup who opened them, the sight of him enough to somewhat calm Astrid’s unquiet mind. He was clearly happy to see them, his eyes nearly flowing over with love as they met her own. But there also was a certain tension in them, in his every movement, and after he’d closed the door behind them again, it became clear that Eret and Dagur were just as tense as he was, the atmosphere overall enough to make her forget everything else.

“What happened?” she asked anxiously, looking around from one man to the other. In a corner, she spotted a table set for two even though it was laden with enough food to last at least twice as many people. But where before she’d been looking forward to this informal meal with her brothers and Hiccup, she now couldn’t even think about eating anything. 

“Nothing, really,” Eret eventually mumbled, looking up from where he sat on his bed’s edge. Astrid wanted to scoff at this obvious lie, but he lifted his hand to directly ward off her protest. “Nothing that changes anything, at least. It’s just been… let’s say, it’s been a rough day.”

Astrid still wasn’t inclined to let the topic drop, but before she could demand a more thorough explanation, Dagur already jumped in. 

He was sitting backwards on a chair, his arms crossed over the backrest, but she suspected that he was still ready to jump in case Eret needed help. “A new rumour was spreading like wildfire during the hunt,” he grumbled, shaking his head in annoyance. “The rumour that… well, that Eret and I are more than just close friends since our childhood and that the whole betrothal is nothing but a charade to cover for us.” 

Astrid could do little more than gape, her eyes wandering from Dagur to Eret and back again. They both looked heartbroken, hunched over and with their arms defensively crossed in front of them. 

“Okay, but why’s that a problem?” Tuff commented after a few more uncomfortable seconds had passed. “I mean… it’s true? And it’s not as if that’s unheard-of; we have Freyr’s male Ástir for a reason, after all.”

With a heavy sigh, Eret raised his head to look at Tuff. “You’re right, it shouldn’t be much of a problem. But that didn’t make this day any easier. Every time we encountered some of the other men in the woods, they made comments about how I should be ashamed of myself for leading the Princess on like that. That I should openly stand to my preferences and tell her the truth, decline her choice, and leave her to someone who can truly satisfy her.”

“That’s a nice way to describe their insults,” Dagur scoffed angrily, but Eret just shrugged.

“It’s what it all boiled down to,” he replied, sounding tired. “And they’re right. I mean... Aside from Hiccup and this charade of a betrothal not being real anyway… It could have become real. And they would’ve been right; you’d deserve better than that, Swanja. Better than me.” 

With the lump forming in her throat making it hard to say anything, Astrid made the few steps to cross the distance between them and sat down next to Eret on his bed. She wasn’t sure whether she was even capable of comforting him right now, but she at least had to try. 

“Hey, don’t say that,” she said softly, reaching to squeeze his hand. “I… When I agreed to marry you, I knew about all this, remember? So whatever they said, it’s nothing but bullshit. And no matter how things are now… I rather would have spent my life with you, as my partner and best friend, than with any of those idiots who only see me as a trophy to be added to their glory.” Imagining a life where Hiccup didn’t exist felt weird. Wrong! But she also knew that what she’d just said was true. If it wasn’t for Hiccup, she would have gladly married Eret.

She wasn’t sure whether her words were able to help him though, or whether they would only make it worse instead. But after a short pause, Eret squeezed her back. “Thanks,” he muttered with a weak smile. “I just… well, I just hope that whoever Father might eventually pick as my wife will think the same. So maybe it’s even good that this cat is out of the bag now. It means whoever it might be will know what to expect right from the beginning.”

To that, Astrid wasn’t able to say anything. It was because of her that this was something to worry about again, and there was nothing she could do to help him there. But instead of letting the awkward silence linger, Eret shook his head and put on an almost scarily dark expression. 

“But that’s not really the problem here,” he went on in a far graver voice than before. “The question is who started this ‘rumour’. And why now?” He motioned for her to sit down at the set table, gladly accepting her help to get up himself without straining his bound chest too much.

“Could it have been Heather?” she asked as she sat down on her seat, her worries over the other woman and how much harm she could do resurfacing again. 

But Dagur vehemently shook his head. “That wouldn’t make any sense. That was a secret she would have wanted to keep, in her own interest. With everyone now knowing that I’m not interested in women, me producing an heir to get her and her child off the hook became just that much more complicated.” He sighed. “And I have no idea who else could be behind this, either. I mean… we tried to not let anyone know but it certainly wasn’t an ironclad secret either. Everyone could’ve found out.” 

Astrid wasn’t entirely convinced though. “Are you sure? There were quite a few people who knew, after all. Could anyone–”

“Maybe,” Eret interrupted her, though directly contradicted himself by shaking his head. “But I don’t think anyone here started that rumour, and I can’t see why Cami would do so, either.” He paused, taking a deep breath, before he continued in a darker tone. “And I don’t want to suspect Snot. He’s acting weird, but… we still know him, right? And I don’t see why he’d do it anyway. Certainly not to separate us; he knows that you know, after all. No, I don’t think he would go behind our backs like that. Especially not with him still being not allowed to get up anyway. He didn’t even have the chance to spread such a rumour without it being too easy to trace it back to him. Anyway,” he went on, noticeably aiming to change the topic and mood to something more cheerful. “People know, and we’ll have to deal with it from now on. Which doesn’t really change anything; it’s just annoying.”

Dagur huffed. “Yeah. Just as annoying as your grandfather making the effort to come and meet you this morning only to yell at you two. I’m just glad this circulating rumour hadn’t reached him yet. But who knows? Maybe he’ll have a heart attack once they do. That would make so many lives easier.” 

At the mentioning of his grandfather, Eret winced and threw an apprehensive and apologetic look to the side – or, more precisely, to where Hiccup was leaning against the wall next to her. Astrid turned too, and easily spotted the pained grimace that crossed Hiccup’s face. Their grandfather… As far as Astrid knew, this had to have been the first time Hiccup even met the old goat with the old man also knowing who Hiccup was. And judging by his reaction, it hadn’t been a pleasant meeting.

Without even thinking about it, she reached for his hand, letting her thumb glide across his knuckles in a way to comfort him. “What did he want?”

Hiccup seemed to appreciate the gesture, squeezed her hand in his and even let something of a weak smile tug at his lips before he said anything. “He scolded Eret for choosing what had to be the worst squire in history,” he said in a low, but clear and almost emotionless voice. “‘It obviously was the fault of that failure that your armour wasn’t in a good-enough state to deflect the blow like good chainmail should. That idiot might as well have tried to kill you himself and he should get executed for his sloppy mistakes.’” he quoted, and let out a harsh laugh. “He didn’t even deign to look at me or to talk to me directly.”

“And just like the old pigheaded asshole he’s always been, he didn’t even listen when I explained that that had only been my decorative armour anyway,” Eret grunted bitterly. “In opposition to all these noblemen who came here because your Father invited them and who knew about the upcoming tournaments, I didn’t bring my heavy battle armour from Eastervale when we came here last fall. That piece of ceremonial chainmail I was wearing was never meant to withstand such a blow, and we didn’t expect… Oh, whatever. He didn’t even want to listen to any of that anyway.”

“Yeah. You said that it wasn’t your good chainmail, and his response was ‘And whose fault is that!?’” Hiccup added, sounding pained. 

“My father’s,” Astrid murmured.

Eret shrugged. “Yes and no. It’s not like we should have expected the armoury here to have chain in my size.” He flexed sarcastically, showing off his physique, and Astrid had to agree with the point; Eret was taller and broader in the chest than most men. “But let’s be honest here. This wasn’t about me,” he continued. “This was about him being upset that all of his dynastic game moves almost got wasted because his last playing piece got a dent. He wasn’t doing it to listen to anybody, just to vent his frustration that we’re not doing what he wants us to do, like good pawns.”

“Well, he never listens, does he?” Tuff threw in, mirth saturating his voice. “Although I’d love to make him listen, especially if someone told him about you and Dagur. Loki, I’d love to see his face.” He shared a dark grin with his sister, but quickly turned serious again, his gaze shifting to Astrid again.

“Anyway,” he went on, the changed tone of his voice and expression on his face showing that he was about to start an entirely different topic. “Wasn’t there something you wanted to tell the others, Astrid?” 

For a heartbeat or three, she just blinked at him in puzzlement. But then, her mood brightened. “Right! There’s something I have to tell you,” she exclaimed at the reminder. The dark atmosphere had distracted her when she’d arrived, had made her focus on her friends’ – no, her family’s – problems instead of what lay ahead of them. But now, it was all back at the forefront of her mind. 

Eagerly, she turned to look at the others again, her hand still holding Hiccup’s squeezing him. “I was lucky this morning,” she began, cheeks heating with excitement. “Tuff and I overheard a conversation between your fathers,” she nodded at Eret and Dagur. “Something about Ravenledge – the county, not the man. Apparently, the man who was supposed to become the new Count resigned – because it was too difficult a job for him, or something – and now, it’s back in the hands of Uncle Oswald and my father. If we can convince them to install Hiccup in that position, then that would be the solution, wouldn’t it?”

At first, all three men just gaped at her. They seemed to need a few moments to wrap their heads around this news, but Astrid couldn’t blame them; she was hardly able to believe in this simple solution either. And that was after she’d already had hours to think about it all. 

“That… that could actually work,” Eret eventually muttered after a seemingly endless pause, something like cautious optimism swinging in his voice. “If Hiccup becomes a count, he automatically should become eligible for you, too. The only question is how we can convince them to–”

“I can use my boon for that,” Astrid interrupted him. Her gaze darted up to Hiccup, eyes filled with excitement. He knew that she was more than willing to use her father's promise in his favour. This was the solution they’d been searching for!

Hiccup was looking at her in return as well, but with a somewhat wavering expression instead of the hope she’d expected to see. As if he wanted to let that hope take over but didn’t quite dare to accept it. 

Dagur seemed more confused though. “Uh, what boon?”

It took her some effort to tear her eyes away from Hiccup, from assuring him that this could work, and look at Dagur instead. “After… after Harold’s execution, my father granted me a wish,” she explained, grimacing at the renewed reminder. “A royal boon. He said I just need to name what I want and as long as it’s within his power, he’ll grant it to me. And I don’t see why naming Hiccup the new Count Ravenledge would not be in his power. Odin, from how it sounded, they even expected to have trouble finding someone who’d be willing to take this position.” 

Eret nodded at her explanation, thoughtfully turning his attention to Hiccup. “What do you think?”

Hiccup’s eyes wandered from one waiting face to the other across the room. He still seemed hesitant though, reluctant even, and Astrid could read his thoughts as if he was saying them out loud. This is too good to be true! 

She got up from her chair and turned toward him, heart singing when his hands glided around her waist practically on reflex. Capturing and holding his gaze, she tried to assure him that this was real. There wasn’t much to be misunderstood from the conversation she’d overheard, after all. 

For an endless moment, they gazed at each other, silently communicating. Astrid didn’t need words to know what Hiccup was thinking and feeling, his love for her and the growing hope crystal clear in his eyes. He nodded ever so slightly, probably only visible to her, and his expression softened, his lips stretching into a cautious smile. “There was a time where I wouldn’t have felt comfortable with this solution,” he murmured, voice rough with emotions. Swallowing, he glanced past her to where Eret and Dagur had to be watching them. “I openly admit that I’d hoped to gain this title back when it was vacant a few months back. If… if things had been different that night, if I’d known you’d distribute the county right away, then I’d probably come up with some reason to stay. I would have tried to recommend myself as best I could, hoping…” He trailed off, his eyes gliding back to Astrid as he lifted one hand to caress her cheek. 

She remembered that night, the first night she’d sneaked out to meet him at the stables. Missing out on those hours they’d spent together that night would have felt devastating back then… but if it had meant that he’d had that title already, it would have been worth it.

“But unrelated to that, I also wanted to gain this title, or any other, with my own means,” he continued in a low voice, his eyes back on her now. “ I wanted to prove myself worthy of you. But now, I know how stupid that was. Now, I won’t turn down such an opportunity. So yes, I’m okay with this idea. More than okay. I’d do anything to be with you, no matter whether it includes gaining a title without my doing or accepting any difficult circumstances that might follow.” He gave her a loving smile. “Because it will be worth it.” 

From one moment to the other, Astrid felt as if every bit of space between them was too much, every thought about decency unimportant. Before she could think about it, she’d stretched, her mouth pressed to his and her hands on his back and in his hair pulling him even closer. This was it! They’d found their solution, the way to be together. This was really happening.

And it seemed as if Hiccup had accepted this truth now, too. He was kissing her back with equal eagerness, holding her close with one arm around her back and the free hand at the nape of her neck – still reflexively mindful of her hair as it seemed, but also unwilling to part from her anytime soon. From behind her, Astrid thought she could hear noises of amusement, chuckling and low voices talking, but she wasn’t in the mood to pay the others any mind. All she wanted to focus on was Hiccup, his body pressed so tightly against hers and his tongue dancing along her own, playful, teasing, joyous. 

But it seemed as if at least one of those assembled in this room wasn’t quite as optimistic as the rest. 

“When you listened in on my father and Uncle Eret,” Dagur asked, apprehensively but in a voice loud enough that it drew even her and Hiccup’s attention, “did they say anything about why exactly Lord Gregson resigned?”

Reluctantly, Astrid parted from Hiccup, though just enough to turn in his arms and give Dagur a thoughtful look. “I… don’t think so,” she said, her forehead wrinkled as she scoured her memories. “Just that there apparently were some reasons to it, but not what those were. Oh, and they said something about an… an elephant, but I don’t know what that was supposed to mean. Elephants are these weird animals in the Southlands, right? Big, with ridiculously large ears and noses?” She threw Hiccup a look and spotted his lips twitching. Clearly, he remembered how they’d looked at that book together, too. Especially the last pages.

“An elephant?” Dagur inquired, his brows furrowed. “That... Was that all they said?”

Astrid shrugged. “I… think so?”

But Tuff shook his head, drawing everyone’s attention when he pushed himself off the wall he’d been leaning against. “No, that wasn’t all,” he said with a thoughtful expression. “I remember because it sounded so odd, as if it meant something completely different. So I memorised it to find out later. Lord Berserker said that ‘while it would make for a great white elephant, it’s getting the poor sap to accept it that’ll be the tricky part’.”

Dagur’s face darkened. “That’s what I feared,” he grumbled.

Eret cocked his head, clearly intrigued by his lover’s reaction. “What is it, Dag? Does that mean anything to you?”

Dagur nodded, lips pressed into a thin line. “A ‘White Elephant’ is something of an idiom we took over from the people of the Southlands,” he explained in a pressed voice. “It means it’s a… a trap, you can say. As in, they give the county to some rival they want to get rid off, knowing that the effort of rebuilding it will ruin them.”

From one moment to the other, Astrid’s good mood fell, her stomach feeling as if it was dropping down to her knees, not helped by Tuff nodding and mumbling something like, “When something looks too perfect, it probably sucks." 

“So… so it’s not a sensible solution after all?” she asked meekly. All this had sounded too good to be true… did that mean it had been nothing but wishful thinking after all?

But Dagur shook his head, albeit reluctantly. “I… didn’t say that. I mean, let’s be honest, it’s not as if you have much to lose anyway. It’s not as if Hiccup would put some major fortune into this county or risk his high reputation if he wasn’t able to succeed.” He gave a harsh snort. “But I’ve read a few of the reports that came in from Ravenledge over the past weeks. The county really is in a horrible state. You’d have to rebuild the entire main city, along with some smaller ones, and that’s not even counting the long-term damage from the old count’s rule.” He started ticking off on his fingers. “You’d have to do all that without having the craftsmen nearby because they have no place to live or to work yet. And without being able to organise the work, because you don’t have any administration. Not even the Orders can be of any help with organising or manpower, because there are no central temples anymore. And in addition to all that, the people won’t easily trust yet another nobleman who comes to rule over them, especially not after Lord Gregson now gave up.” He shook his head. “I’m not saying it’s impossible, but...” He shrugged, looking grim.

Astrid felt the weight of Dagur’s words pressing down on them, noticeably dampening the good mood from only moments before. But before she could work through them and try to come up with reasonable objections, Ruff beat her to it. “Not trying to downplay the problems you just mentioned,” she said dryly. “But I think Hiccup and Astrid have an advantage your Lord Gregson didn’t have.” 

Dagur cocked his head at her, puzzled. “And that would be what exactly?”

Ruff gave a snort. “Astrid is the Princess! It’s not just any other nobleman who comes to these people but the daughter of the King herself. That alone should give the people there a little hope, the trust that, this time, their problems get taken seriously. And I’d be surprised if the King wouldn’t send some more serious help in the form of goods and men and money when it comes down to ensuring his daughter’s future.”

“She’s right,” Eret threw in before anyone else could say anything, a grin on his face now as his eyes met Astrid’s. “And that’s not the only advantage you might have.” He took a moment to look from one to the other, his grin widening. “Remember what we talked about the other night? We might not be able to get Hiccup a title… But once he has one, we’re definitely in a position to support him. We’d still have to talk to our fathers, but I don’t think they’d be against drawing up trade contracts and assurances of support in advance. Hiccup might not have much to offer all on his own, but he sure as Hel has friends in powerful positions.”

Slowly, Dagur nodded. “That would make a difference, indeed,” he agreed, his face brightening. “It still won’t be easy, though. It’ll probably take years before something like normalcy or routine would come back to your life. Are you sure you’re feeling up to such a task and the responsibility?” he asked, his eyes firmly on Hiccup. 

Hiccup nodded, though a little tense. “I’m prepared to take that kind of responsibility.” His eyes dropped to her, his lips forming a soft smile. “So yes. I’ll do whatever it takes.”

 . o O o .

Oh, wow! Looks like there's an easy solution after all. 😇

Or... is there? *evil laughter in Author*

Next chapter

[cruzrogue]

Into the Future PartIII

#Fictober19 @fictober-event

————————————————————————

for fanfiction:

Prompt number: Prompt 29 “I’m doing this for you.”

Fandom (AU if applicable): #arrow fanfiction #olicity 

Rating:PG13

Warnings/Tags:  time travel 

Summary: Felicity lands up time traveling to the moment right after her future self goes with the Monitor. Landing in the bunker and meeting her future kids. They don’t seem impressed. As if that isn’t enough for a young-version Felicity to deal with she needs to head back into her present time and stop Oliver from completing a task on Lian Yu. Keeping the ley lines intact.  

Notes: Felicity Smoak goes to the future and meets three members of Future Team Arrow. 

Part 3 of 4  Prompt 29 “I’m doing this for you.” (on A03 now)

Part 4 of 4  Prompt 30 “I’m with you, you know that.” (next prompt)

Notes: The continuation as Felicity goes to Lian Yu and meets Oliver Queen who has no clue who she is… he’ll be getting a crash course on how to be Smoaked.

Past ones: 

1/2 Prompt number 1 “It will be fun, trust me.”

2/2  Prompt number: 4 “I know you didn’t ask for this.”

~~~~~~****~~~~~~~~sp@ce~~~~~~****~~~~~~~~

Into the Future PartIII on A03

 “You’ve got this cool mystery house…”

Interrupting Felicity to make sure she knows once again the name of the abode their currently in. “House of Mystery.”

She shakes her head at the slight difference he surely needed you point out and starts her argument again, “You have this House of Mystery and I have a bookstore full of weird mind altering books. We are living every science fiction dork’s dream right now.”

“It is not a dream per se we are living…”

“John! I meant something entirely different. It wasn’t even regarding anything to do with us personally. Never mind!” She gives up.

He smirks at how irate she can get. In-between Holidays and school vacations John finds himself with a roommate. Felicity Smoak’s key has a way of her entering the house where a room shifts to become this bookstore of hers. He can’t say he has had any significant issues with this fiery spirit that is so gung-ho.

Coming to enjoy her visits. As a loner he shakes his head that this young interesting girl who has been encompassed to save them all from a certain doom. It is so like the fates to play this game. To throw a person into a vast learning curve where each step has dire consequences.

“I’m going to go read, there is this book that has an eerie eye that seems to want me to open it.” His look says it all. “I know it sounds dangerous. The scripts on the outside say futurae, relicum, futurum, relicuum.” She shrugs she knows it has to do with future events. She tried to translate but got these words: rest, remainder, future, residue, mortal remains. Still she going to open this book and hopeful learn something of importance.

“Be weary of this book.”

Winking at John, which to him she can’t do right she says, “Eye shall be.” It just has him shake his head at her dorkiness.

Closing the door behind her she heads to the small desk that she laid the book on. The eye imprinted upon the middle looks so alive. It doesn’t move though because if it did she’d throw it and never touch it again but nonetheless it visually creeps her out. “Okay, let’s do this.” Cracking it open for the first time she can smell the musty old pages. “Ew.” She sees nothing written upon all the empty pages. “Huh?” Closing the book, it is then the illustrated eye opens and she makes an Eep sound as she drops from her chair with the book still in her grasp but doesn’t hit the floor.

No, there is no more floor. Nor walls or ceiling that she has come to recognizes as the bookstore. She’s in silent shock as she is falling through darkness with this book in her hands. It feels like forever but it mere seconds until lights flood her vision and boom she hit solid concrete.

Making a grumbling sound as she lets the book drop to the floor and she massages her rear end. The sting of hitting this floor hard most likely to leave a nice size bruise. Felicity getting up she realizes she is now facing a blonde holding a bow with an arrow pointing directly at her.

It is a male voice that is wearing a suit that comes from behind this scary looking girl that looks to be around her age. “Who are you? How did you get here?”

“Um I don’t even know what here is.” The blonde pulls the arrow back slightly and Felicity even without knowing much about archery knows that it’s not a good sign. “Hey I come in peace.”

“Who are you?” The man says again.

“My name is Felicity Smoak.”

Both of them make a gruff sound. The girl moves slightly closer but looks to want to let the arrow go. “He asked you for your name. So, try again.”

Felicity just taking in this bunker, “Are we underground? Who are you three.” She notices a black male taking the scene in. She has never seen any of these individuals in her life.

“We ask the questions?” Felicity just nods she really doesn’t need to be skewered.

“Like my sister just said. Answer the question.”

“Okay, I was reading. Well, I tried to read it. The thing… The book really has no words on its pages and well I fell through something or another.” Shrugging because that is the truth.

“I swear I will let this arrow go in the next second…”

“Frack.” If she’s going to die at least she will do it in style of being true to herself. “I am Felicity Megan Smoak and I think you are way too pushy.”

“Mia, maybe she is telling the truth. I mean we did see her just fall to the bunker’s floor.” Conner says still keeping an eye on the intruder.

“Mia, cute. Sounds like a cat’s name. I mean I’ve never had a pet but that’s a name I’d most likely call it.”

The blonde moans but lowers her bow. “If you’re Felicity Smoak prove it?”

“What do you mean. Prove it? How many Felicity Smoak’s’ have you met?”

William answers, “One, and she was a great woman.”

“Okay. Not to sound odd or anything but what year is it?”

Conner chuckles but says 2040 which has Felicity gasp. “Oh! I’m way in the future. I’m like fifty-one here. Do I look good for my age, not that…? That it is relevant. You know what? Yea it is. I mean I’m all for brainpower but I’d still like to look good.”

“She sounds like Felicity?” Conner supplies.

“We have a machine that will prove to us your identity.”

“Okay. So, do we know each other?”

William looking at what could be his step-mom in awe. “I doubt it.”

“I meant do you know the future me?”

Connor shakes his head as he holds a smile.

Mia just annoyed and yet excited tells Conner, “Conner, shut it. Just get Archer.”

“Who is Archer?”

William can’t help but laugh, “It something you were tinkling on with when we were living in Hope Springs.”

Felicity’s eyebrow raises, “We do know each other.”

“Let’s just see what Archer says first.” As Conner activates the device. It goes through a protocol mode and states each person in the room. “Okay, you’re Felicity.”

“Yea, I know.” Inspecting the two men their names don’t ring any bells but the little program she might have built kept from telling her the other female’s name in the room. “It doesn’t recognize you Mia. Why?”

Mia still has her eyes on her mother. It’s probably best if she doesn’t know, time travel rules she thinks. Just find out what her mom needs so she can be on her way. “Safety protocol I guess, why are you here.”

“You are very talkative.” Felicity says in a huff. Talking to this girl is like pulling teeth. “If this program is made by me there would be a reason I’d keep you off its grid. We’re related aren’t we?”

Mia a little uncomfortable, “How? How did you know?”

“I’m a genius. Well people get uncomfortable or roll their eyes when I mention it but I’m usually the smartest cookie in a room.”

William laughs, “That’s because you usually are.” Felicity smiles at him. She already liked him before but she likes him even more now.

“You are a cutie. Please tell me you’re Oliver Queen’s son.” Now that gets everyone in the room to gasp. “You said we lived together. You look to be around your early twenties. Only reason I would live with a younger you is if I were your mother, aunt, or some sort of maternal figure. The way you gasped at my name I figuring I’m your mom. This girl here is my daughter. I can see resemblance of family between you both and Mia and I could pass for sisters.”

“Whoa, you really are smart.” Conner says impressed.

Felicity just shrugs but keeps her eyes focused on Conner Hawke. “You on the other hand have been giving my daughter the heart eyes and she scowls at you so there is love problems here but I’d be a good mom and butt out but don’t you hurt my baby girl.”

“Mom!” Mia says and then takes it back, “I mean not my mom.”

“Sure honey. Tell me? Is there more of you?”

“What?”

“I always thought if I had kids which at this stage of my life I don’t want but if I did. Being a single child I always dreamed of three maybe four kids.”

“Four kids?”

“Hey, if I dream. I dream big. I always wanted a bigger family and now that I know of my future husband because he is kind of cute for being an older guy I could see myself not being able to keep my hands off…”

Both William and Mia interrupt. “Please don’t.” “No, ew.”

“Not that time isn’t a huge flux of space and rhythm but there must be a reason I’m here.” Felicity looks at the program. A DNA based program is dangerous. In the wrong hands it could be apocalyptic. “I’m here to change things. Save the world and stuff.”

Mia states, “That is something similar you have said about dad but you’ve always were so vague.”

“Well if I know myself. Protecting you would always be my objective and it seems I made sure you could handle yourself.” Mia smiles her mom had her train from a young age. “Can I look at the program?” She can tell that these three are having a non-verbal discussion. “It’s probably why I was sent here by that book.” Felicity glances at the book still on the floor, “I’m doing this for you.”

William looking at the book. “A book?”

“Hmm hmm. A creepy book. It brought me here to learn something so as much as it rocks knowing I have two cool kids at least I need to do my best to help and maybe even protect your dad.”

“Dad?”

“Yes, Oliver Queen your father. Where is he anyways?” That is when Felicity can feel the mood shift. She gets it. Whatever is supposed to be stopped from happening, happened. “Ah!” She pauses as many thoughts goes through her mind. “Okay, can I look at Archer or not. Maybe there is something else that…”

William takes the device that Conner had and gives it to his step-mom. He’ll keep from telling her he isn’t really her son. Some information shouldn’t be privy it could alter everything. He watches as Felicity takes a sit and begins to understand her handiwork.

~~~~~~****~~~~~~~~sp@ce~~~~~~****~~~~~~~~

Spending time with her future kids will always be a highlight she’ll carry with her always. It was quite hard to leave them. All around the same age it was like having siblings in a way. No matter she had to leave and somehow now knows that she needs Oliver to not find that monument in Lian Yu.

As the fates have smiled on her she thinks. When she gets back from the future John Constantine is planning on an excursion to that very same place.

“I don’t know. It’s dangerous territory.”

“John, are you trying to get me to beg?”

“No. I doubt you’d go that far my love, you’d find a way to hitch a ride with me. Besides I know how important this all is. I be a damn fool to hinder you.”

“Sometimes you are so sweet.”

“I’m always sweet.”

“Ha, maybe when you’re napping.”

“Whoa, whoa there. You’ve watched me nap?”

“Really John, wouldn’t that be creepy?”

“Only if you got caught.”

“Well, I haven’t watched you sleep but if I did I would have tried to steal those terrible cancer sticks you carry around.”

“They’re cigarettes.”

“Same difference.”

“Good thing I like you.” He extends his arm, “Ready for an adventure?”

To be continued on next prompt…

[magic-and-moonlit-wings]

Hi, why did Jim not like Strickler dating Barbara? With Trollhunter!Claire how would things play out in Unbecoming? If the show had kept AAARRRGGHH female, how would this affect it, both in the show and meta? And finally, you mentioned the gay subtext with Blinky and AAARRRGGHH, why didn't they make them a couple? I mean, ever since Korra and Steven Universe, LBGT representation has skyrocketed, I don't want to come across as a SJW, but I just wish that the show took more chances with itself.

Okay, well, I should preface my analysis of Jim’s reaction to Stricklake by saying my biological parents are happily married to each other, so I have never personally been in the position of ‘child whose single parent has started dating again’; and I only knew two kids in high school whose parents I knew were divorced, and they didn’t talk to me about their parents’ love lives; so I can only infer based primarily on media stereotypes.

There are a few reasons portrayed in media as to why the child of a single parent reacts negatively to that parent getting a new love interest.

We can rule out Jim hoping his biological parents will get back together, because James Senior is a complete nonentity in their lives. Jim only mentions him four times, all in the first season - twice to Barbara (“You remember when I was old enough to ask about Dad? Remember what you told me? You said, we just have to take care of each other. And that’s all I’m doing, Mom.”) (“Shrimp cakes? Gosh, I haven’t had those since … since …” “Dad made them for us?” “I didn’t think you were old enough to remember.” ”Oh, I remember enough. I remember how his beard used to scratch my face when he hugged me. How he used to make you laugh. But most of all how much he hurt you when he left.”), once to Bular (“You wanna see Dad. I get it, trust me. But we don’t always get what we want.”), and once to Blinky (“You know I don’t care about my father!”)

There is, popularly shown in media and I’m sure it comes up in real life too, a dissonance in a kid’s mind between their school and home lives, which makes it uncomfortable to have their parents and teachers interacting, exacerbated if the student is having some kind of difficulty at school. Jim reacts negatively to Barbara’s interest in Strickler before he even knows Strickler is a Changeling. (“So. Mr Strickler. He seems very nice. Is he single?” “What?! I don’t know!”) (“Did you seriously just ask my teacher out on a date?!”)

Jim assumes something like a caregiver role at home, taking care of food prep and household maintenance. The introduction of a new person into their lives could set off a reflexive response of, “No, we don’t need you, we’ve been managing just fine on our own.”

Jim’s also very protective. The precedent of Barbara having a relationship that ended badly means Jim might be worrying from the start that a new relationship will also end in her getting hurt.

Any change, positive or negative, creates a stress response while a person readjusts. Having his mother start dating again would be a big change for Jim. (We see no indication she’s done so in the past ten years, although it’s possible she did and the relationships just never got serious enough for her to introduce the person to her son, and it’s also possible that it just never came up because Barbara’s past relationships weren’t relevant in a show focusing primarily on Jim being the Trollhunter.)

And then, of course, Jim finds out Strickler is a Changeling, and thereafter views all of Strickler’s interactions with Barbara through the lens of “he’s trying to get to me and using my mom as both a weapon and a shield”, which is accurate for quite some time, and of course is going to make Jim angry and scared, and not going to warm him to the idea of them being together. 

An Unbecoming with Trollhunter!Claire raises the question of whether Not Enrique would still take Enrique’s place.

In canon, Enrique getting swapped was indirectly Jim and Toby’s fault. Because they followed the goblins to the museum, they saw Nomura in troll form, and she revealed the Fetch and suggested bringing in a new Changeling to convince Bular not to kill her after her identity was compromised.

Therefore, a solid argument can be made that in the show’s version of Unbecoming, Enrique was never kidnapped. We never do find out for sure.

If the swap happens because of something Claire did as Trollhunter, Enrique would probably never get switched in the Unbecoming episode, which would be one of the reasons Claire thought at first that it was a better world. (Though she might eventually realize she misses Not Enrique.)

On the other hand, if the initial Trollhunter!Claire timeline was one in which Not Enrique were already planted in the Nuñez house before Claire became the Trollhunter, then Claire’s dynamic with Not Enrique just got a lot more complicated. She has memories of growing to see Not Enrique as an adopted sibling, which he no longer shares, and she has memories of saving Original Enrique from the Darklands, which she is no longer in a position to be able to do.

I figure the ‘failed attempt to thwart the reopening of Killahead Bridge’ thing would happen, because I interpret Unbecoming as a worst-case-scenario vision crafted by Merlin to make the Trollhunter off-kilter and desperate enough to do what the wizard wants without question, but I see this backfiring when he reveals himself because Claire would be furious.

Either way, time reverts itself to how it was before at the end of the episode.

Honestly I don’t see it affecting the overall plot of the show much if AAARRRGGHH had remained Johanna, especially if the writers still went with the show backstory of “raised by Gumm-Gumms and then deserted” rather than the book backstory of “one of the leaders of the armies against Gunmar”.

She would probably have stayed a pacifist for the first half of Season One, to force Jim to have to learn how to fight instead of just hiding behind his big scary troll friend.

We might’ve actually seen cats in the Domzalski house, if the gag was kept that they are drawn to Johanna and love sleeping on her fur, to their peril; but all the cats-being-eaten scenes were just barely off-camera in the show, so maybe not.

I personally would’ve had a less negative reaction to Jlaire, because Claire wouldn’t be the only girl in the core cast, although I might still feel like it was an “Obligatory Het Romance So The Main Character Looks Straight (Or If He’s Bi It Never Comes Up In The Show)”.

BlinkAAARRRGGHH would probably be just as popular as it is now, but if the ship still wasn’t canon (or even if it was), there would also be a number of people defending keeping Blinky and Johanna ‘just friends’ because of the under-representation of close male-female friendships in popular media.

The fandom would probably also create the sapphic ship of Johanna/Nomura, based on how they’re both kickass fighter ladies who used to serve Gunmar and then deserted. (Johannomura? Nomuranna, despite the different number of ‘N’s, sounds like it refers to Nomura/Morgana, though I think that would called Nomurgana, and Jomura could be misinterpreted as the ‘J’ being for Jim, which … no. Johannomura is clearest. Maybe Johmura if that’s too long.)

I don’t know why BlinkAAARRRGGHH was never made official, but I can make some guesses.

Option 1: they didn’t know how popular the show would be and didn’t want to lose potential popularity due to censors not allowing it to air in certain countries or conservative parents not letting their kids watch it.

Option 2: because Blinky and Johanna genuinely did seem to be Not Romantically Involved in the novel, the writers didn’t realize that the adjustments and expansions made to the characters and their interactions made them look like they were together, and so the romantic subtext was unintentional.

Option 3: it was presumed that it went without saying, like how no one in the show goes out of their way to point out Claire’s parents are married to each other. (Okay, except Jim does address Claire’s parents as “Mr and Mrs Nuñez” twice, so that comparison doesn’t quite work.) This is probably the interpretation that will ‘age best’ as LGBT+ rep in children’s-marketed media becomes more prevalent and accepted.

Option 4: the writers have a different love interest planned for one or both of the characters, to be introduced in Wizards, and the romantic subtext between AAARRRGGHH and Blinky was either unintentional or meant to be one-sided.

Option 5: they aren’t together yet, and the script is building up to them becoming an official couple in Wizards.