#like yeah obvs i unfollowed them now

[cosmicsnufkin]

for the record if you ever see me reblogging from a zionist or terf or anyone spewing anything racist or antisemitic or ableist, please just let me know i'm tired of finding out half a year too late

[zmediaoutlet]

What's your opinion on the fandom rhetoric about how Sam lacks bodily autonomy but Dean has it? I personally think it's weird that it's such a widespread idea when it's just blatantly untrue. A big theme for Dean's character is that his body is seen as a weapon or tool for others to use, so it's strange that people claim that he has full bodily autonomy.

(...okay, that the gif is by 'unfuckablebogtroll' is somehow very fitting.)

I think my main opinion of the fandom rhetoric is that there are a lot of batshit bitter sam girls who screech that dean is a meanie meanerton who doesn't respect sammy's presh 'tonomy and there are a lot of batshit extreme dean girls who wail about how sam is a meanie meanerton who, idk, waterboards dean in his spare time or whatever they're complaining about this week (I've unfollowed as many as I can of both camps), so for the most part both groups can be completely flushed down into the sewers of 'jesus christ, do you guys ever actually watch the show rather than circlejerk the same four arguments about it? ...no? oh. well, at least you're honest.'

So, with that said.

Yeah, obviously Dean lacks autonomy. But there's a difference between autonomy and agency, and I'm not going to pretend to have a super solid grasp on either (since a lot of philosophical debate [especially by fangirls] makes me want to jump into the aforementioned sewer just not to hear it anymore), but I can at least kind of make a stab, since you asked.

At least in the way I understand it (do you see all the caveats), bodily autonomy is literally getting to decide what happens to your body, including where it goes and who's inside it and what's done with it, and agency is general decision-making of like the brain sort -- what decisions will I make, who will I be, and so on. Both Sam and Dean are assailed on both fronts alllllll the time. Fandom folks tend to exaggerate those assaults on their preferred brother (because, for some reason, egregious victimhood is the only way you get to be a cool character?? what is that about.), but as with a lot of things in CW's Supernatural, the actual facts are a lot more balanced than fandom weirdos will admit.

Sure, Sam's got a bunch of autonomy assaults. Torture, possession, etc. Most of the time, though, I see his agency as pretty intact. He may not necessarily want to do some of the things he does (childhood hunting comes in here), but he chooses to do them. Is he manipulated sometimes? Sure. Lied to? Obv. But there's an essential steel pillar at the center of Sam and whether they're good choices or whether they're bad choices, he is the one who makes them, and he lives with those consequences. This is part of why the s9 thing with Gadreel is troubling: yeah, it's about bodily autonomy on one (more boring) level, but the much bigger problem is that Dean overrode his agency -- part of why I tend to believe that Sam's biggest objection is that Dean lied and then couldn't apologize for it, when Sam's agency is the most precious thing he owns. Now, he's a smart guy, and there are times his agency does take a blow because of some canon circumstance -- he doesn't want to do X but the world will end if Y, so X it is -- but for the most part Sam's solid and he can live with what he has to do. Though he won't pointlessly die of blue balls about it. What a silly stand on agency that would be.

Dean, meanwhile, doesn't actually have his bodily autonomy violated too much. By which I mean: of course, Dean-as-object is one of my favorite tags, of COURSE he's used as a meatsack and a weapon and a fuckdoll and all those lovely things. But he's very rarely literally possessed; he's holding the blade or the gun or what-have-you. That said, his agency is in the fuckin' gutter, haha, and that's more often what I mean by Dean-as-object. From childhood he's fully expecting to be told what to do, to be used as a pawn, to be used in other ways, to take on someone else's responsibility and make it his own and subsume his actual desires and wants for the good of... whoever. Usually John, but not always. This is something Sam doesn't really... do, that often. Sam might hate that he's making a choice but he does seem to understand that he is the one making it, whereas on Dean's part it so often feels like the choice is automatic -- of course he'll do what John says, of course he'll sell his soul, of course he'll... kiss some lady so the Qareen chases him instead. Now, are all those things tied to autonomy, too? Of course. But with Dean I feel like it's a bigger issue that his agency has been taken out at the knees ever since he was ~5 years old -- the autonomy problem is very much secondary.

Agency and autonomy are tied together and assaults on both happen relatively equally to both characters. What matters more is their attitudes about it, and their natures (whether they're essential or if they've been nurtured into acting a particular way). And, of course, there are different times in canon where these tendencies shift or even flip, e.g. in late s8 where Sam's certainty wobbles, or in s10 where Dean's autonomy w/r/t the Mark of Cain is really dicey.

Violated vs violable, victimized vs victim. A ton of it is in the eye of the beholder and OBVIOUSLY fandom will just sail off in its own directions any ol' way, depending on what shipping mood someone is in, how much projection is going on, what the phase of the moon is, etc. But generally speaking I find that Sam has a lot of agency in his life but often his autonomy is imperilled; Dean has a lot of autonomy but his agency is practically nil. At least for a while. What's nice is that Sam does have agency and he uses that agency to choose his own path in life, decide what he wants, and what he wants is -- a life with Dean. Dean maybe never really had a choice in the matter, but so what? He can stay in his bunker, and fight the monsters he needs to fight, and -- lucky for him, there's a strong hand covering his left side. What more could a cat ask for.

[demonsfate]

guilty as charged (mun edition) // accepting // anonymous asked . . . Have you ever unfollowed a blog? What were the reasons?

All the time LOL. Most often I unfollow unactive blogs, typically blogs that have been inactive for a year or damn near it. Why do I bother? Because sometimes I'll notice my dash is very slow and I'm like "daaamn I've got [this many] followers... how come nothin's happenin?" Then I realize oh wait, a lotta my mutuals became inactive lol. So softblocking them is a good way to gage how many active followers I actually have.

Other times I've unfollowed a blog just because I personally didn't vibe with the mun's ooc posts, or content they're putting out. Or, one time when somebody was just reblogging TOO many posts that were completely unrelated to their muse, and was just spamming the dashboard with unrelated fandom reblogs as if they were a personal or somethin. I don't mind a lotta ooc posts, but I do start drawing the line when my dash gets spammed with completely different fandom posts that aren't related to their muse in any way.

The most controversial time I unfollowed somebody, and this may kinda count as drama but not really, was this K.ingdom Hearts blog. For some reason, my Riddler blog took MONTHS to pick up. I mean, I had it for 4 months and couldn't get a single follow back or anything. I have no clue why - literally nobody wanted to write with me then. (Which is really bizarre, given that, I think at one point, it had 400 followers - many ppl started writing with me later). I'm gonna guess it's because my blog had dark themes / backgrounds. (I wrote my Eddie as a CSA survivor - this may be semi important later)

Anyway, a confession on one of 'em RP confession blogs was expressin' how sad they were that nobody was writing with them, I agreed with it too, also offering I'd write with 'em too. A KH blog came up to me and saying they were having the same problem. I was about to learn a big lesson in writing with them just 'cos I was sympathetic LOOOL. So basically I followed, and we kinda talked on and off for a couple weeks, we wrote a lil. But then their topics started getting ... weirder, horrible even.

Then suddenly, their posts got super fucking crazy. Like they BRAGGED about their tags were apparently QUOTES from the Columbine shooting and the Jamestown cult tragedy?! I didn't fuckin' know 'cos who would??? And like when I went to unfollow them, they were having a thread where the character casually threatens to rape his brother and it's like holy shiiiiiiiiiit. So of course, I hardblocked 'em for that clownery.

Unfortunately, I started getting anon hate on my blog (obvs from him). I got like 4 anon hates in a row - but I blocked the anon and well, that did that lol. Some of the anon hates were like "I thought you liked dark content..." and it's like yeah, when HANDLED WITH RESPECT LMAO. My character was written as a CSA survivor as a background, I don't actually write the fuckin' act out, it's just part of his story. And like, it's also there to show how male victims handle it, and how a lot of sexual abuse survivors tend to turn to hard drugs to cope with it. my BLOG HAD NOTHING THAT WAS GLORIFYING / USING TRUE CRIME SHIT & THEN HAVING MY CHARACTER THREATENING TO UGHGHHH. And like, I didn't call 'em out, didn't mention it on my blog. They can write whatever the fuck they want, I just don't want anything to do with that stuff lmao. So I blocked them.

Then I got one of their mutuals messaging me like "why did you block [user]? they thought you were good friends with them. they're really hurt :(" and it's like?? I kinda talked to them every now & then thru DMS, that's it. We never exchanged discords ffs, we were far from "friends" never mind good friends lmao. Also don't be wildin' on your dashboard, ppl are likely to become uncomfortable and unfollow.

[andthebubbles]

bridgerton 3x01 spoilers under the cut obv

IM FINE

DO I HAVE TO GIF ALL A&B MOMENTS MYSELF LATER OR IS SOMEONE GONNA FUCKING DO IT FOR ME

WHY DOESN'T ANYONE EVER TELL ME ABOUT THIS

DYING HERE

lmao god i'm watching this slowly bc now i'm GONNA REWATCH THIS SCENE

the temptation to skip through to the next a&b scene is real lemme tell you

lmao help i'm watching this so slowly atm

why is benedict like skjfkjfgfkg

oh my god CRELOISE

why did we miss prudence's wedding 😭

pen/genevieve!!!! so many possible ships

omggg more a&b!! more family stuff!!!! WHY ISN'T ANYONE TALKING ABOUT THIS

anthony and benedict sprawling on the sofas and they BOTH LOOK SO GOOD

actually fucking dying here, i need more siblings shenanigans; when they all yeet off with gregory aaakjfgfjkggh and sfjgnfkgfg anthony being big bro aaaah

okay, third rewatch and moving on i swear lol

omggg... yeah i forgot, people would've been nasty to eloise after the theo stuff, and cressida was the only one kind to her?????!!?!?!?!!?!? OMG I NEED TO KNOW MORE

the peneloise is electric too

omfg MORE A&B!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is the slowest watch of an ep ever lol bc i already have my faves

IM FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE

PUPPY DOG EYESSSSSSSS

how much giffing do i have to do?? bc all i've seen on my dash so far is decidedly NOT a&b and i've already unfollowed all the blogs i don't want to follow anymore and i'm just following the general bridgerton ones and WHY NO MASSES OF A&B HAHA godddd do i have to do everything myself skjfnkfjgk

also this does all really give me that s1 vibes of anthony at the club which i have missedddd

like, anthony sprawling with his gay!sit like that, i've not seen that since s1 awwww

anthony's fluffy hair in bed...... 🥺

fluffy fluffy fluffyyyy (i will always miss his s1 hair)

also, slut:

ohhh the cressida/eloise/pen going onnnnnnnnn

OMG ACTUALLY FREAKING OUT OVER CRESSIDA/ELOISE THE SHIFT STITCH and cressida was so heart eyes ksjfgfkjgkf

ohhh this is very s1 anthony lol

awww the anthony and francesca bit

cressida being delightfully evil but what if she did it for eloise bc she would know eloise has some animosity towards pen :3 hahahaa halp

(the ~you would never court me is so a/b!anthony coded (except he doesn't think he's worth being courted at all :3))

OMG I WAS RIGHT, CRESSIDA DID IT FOR ELOISE AND SHE WAS LOOKING FOR HER APPROVAL omgggggggggg "i thought we did not like penelope" ohmygod cressida <3

omg where are all the creloise gifsets??????????????????? this is beautiful

"let us only think of ourselves" CRESSIDA "we are far more interesting"

"i am inclined to agree with you" OMG SHIPPING THEM

am actually happy crying here ahaha

NOM HELLO

interesting that violet is delaying moving out of bridgerton house. sounds like some fics i've read lol (thinking of A Thousand Cuts, actually)

violet??? piano duets??? vulnerability????????

why is colin coming across as dumb and slappable (just like anthony i guess (runs in the family lmao))

ohhh the eloise and colin interaction ehehe lovely, and then the LW talk between them and eloise being like skjfgkfgfkfg inside

all right am i making a&b gifs first and those select anthony bits i screencapped, or am i watching ep 2-4 first....

ETA: in a way it's good that anthony's not in the next few eps or else i'd be watching ep 2-4 soooo slowly

anyway i guess i better watch the eps first, then make gifs. after all, by then perhaps someone else will have made a&b and creloise gifs!!

[silly-chiroptera]

Hello!!! sorry if this is random and you probably wont see it anyway im guessing, but I wanted to apologize for any messages you get from those toxic davesport fans and shit like that :( I'm a davesport shipper myself but i hate to see other people shitting on others for not shipping davesport or if someone ships something else. this fandom is so small i dont even get how theres so much drama for absolutely nothing its actually fucking insane how sensitive people are in this fandom.

in my version of davesport (depending on how im feeling actually), they usually just act like good friends; not too close but not too far either. Yeah, they MAY have a crush on each other but I at least don't think jack would make it AS obvious. And honestly I don't think they would be very lovey-dovey too. The most I can see them doing canonically is holding hands very rarely or just giving each other a quick hug, normal shit friends do. Not full on making out and cuddling 24/7 stuff.

I've came across your account or whatever a few times on tumblr now and i just wanted to say I really appreciate your art!!! im guessing you also weren't very popular like other artists since you dont get talked about at all anywhere else, and thats a shame.

I apologize once again for writing all of this lmao i didnt mean for it to be so long but yeah I really wish you were more recognized in the dsaf community for good reasons obv! sorry if you dont like reading abt davesport either lol, i swear they're not all I talk about. if anything, i like talking about the kennedy siblings more, they never have enough content either.

nah its good m80 you dont have to apologize for people who wont apologize themselves for acting so deranged in the worst way possible i haven't received any hate messages or people attempting to argue with me about my opinion yet thankfully though so there's that! if people don't really vibe with me then its whatever they can just unfollow me if they don't like my unpopular thought processing... there's like literally hundreds of other fans who like that ship and i personally dont understand the people who make a big deal about other people hating it as if it were a cockroach infestation. davesport shippers are the majority here GRJKDKLS at this point i don't really care about getting a whole lot of recognition...i really only care about having this blog be a safe space for people who are more like me rather than trying to cater to the majority of the dsaf fanbase but thank you for saying that ! :) also i love the kennedy family sm even though i havent attempted to draw peter or rarely drew dee i love them very much and all three of them kinda remind me of myself in little ways

[humanitys-strongest-bamf]

hey, kat. it is that anon.

i just came here to apologize for just ....yeah....how that all went down. i wrote that message in haste. i'm abc so when i saw your post my first thought was "wow kinda not cool of them to say that" but then i thought about how i would've posted the same thing if my relatives were fatshaming me. i agree with you that--especially in a predominantly white society--that we have every right to speak to our identities and cultures, including their unrealistic beauty standards.

i looked through your about-mes and couldn't find any mention of your identity, not that you have to disclose that tho. at the time, i tried to think "how can i tell this person that what they said is not ok if they are not-chinese, but that they have every right to (and i can relate) if they are?" and obviously i did a poor job conveying that. i was weighing the possibility that you were white and saying something racist against the possibility that you were also chinese and you had the right to say that.

didn't want to come off anon because we're moots who just haven't really talked much and i don't want to get off on the wrong foot because i was hoping to become friends eventually. i'm not sure if i can salvage things, so if you want me to just unfollow that's fine.

once again very sorry for my miscommunications. like i said, i was feeling kinda fiery as i thought about the possibility of that post coming from a white person. i hope my apology can bring you some peace. wholeheartedly, i hope you are okay and im sorry once again.

(editing bc I was too stoned to see the part about you being abc alskdkfjfg)

honestly, i think the main thing was that this could have been avoided if you had dm'd me. i'm a *tad* less agitated about it now because i've had time to process and took some anxiety meds.

and thank you for taking the time to clarify. i appreciate it. and again, i get it. you were trying to watch out for a marginalized group. communicating through text is difficult.

tldr;

- you don't have to salvage anything - me explaining the white savior complex a bit more, although I appreciate you clarifying about being abc (so am I!) - although i'm still not okay with the original ask i do appreciate you reaching out again and taking the time to clarify - i'm sorry for being so hostile about it /gen - if you do want to chat feel free to dm (whether about this or hornyposting - i'm stoned af rn lmao and am chilling, esp now that you've taken the time to clarify/reach out)

i wouldn't worry about salvaging anything because it doesnt need to be. you taking the time to type this out already says the world about your position and intentions as more genuine and, honestly

most people don't know. my main gripe was the feeling that someone was trying to come in and shut my voice down. with the invalidation that i have dealt with personally, but also as a community that is constantly having our voice stomped on, the comment about feeling the right to say it was what set me off.

I'm sorry I just kinda assumed you were white (guess we were in the same boat there lmao), but a huge thing that irks me in general (not isolated to this obvs), is that a lot of the people that do these types of callouts are usually someone with multiple dominant identities, and rarely the identity of the group they're trying to protect. and this is a huge problem in the social work field especially because the dominant group is *constantly* speaking FOR the marginalized group, regardless of its what they want or not.

anyway, i'm glad you reached out. i'm still not okay with the ask, but you bringing clarity to it does make it a bit easier to deal with. if you want to come off anon and dm me, i'd be glad to talk and chat, even if it's about this (or levi ackerman's cock idrc)

with anons, comes an extra layer of unease, animosity, and uncertainty, so the potential for miscommunication is very high. but again, the fact that you came out, clarified, despite technically not even needing to because i never would've figured out who you were anyway, says much more about your intentions and authenticity (positive) more than anything else could have

sorry i was so hostile in my responses. this is clearly something i've had to tell people off about. my offer still stands, if you want to dm, please feel free (i'm nice once you get to know me i swear LMAO) to

[blakbonnet]

15 questions

I was tagged by @xoxoemynn @not-nervous-jester and @skysofrey <3

1. Are you named after anyone?

My shitty father was/is a giant history nerd and named me after a manuscript (my official name i mean lmao). The manuscript has two parts - the first part became my nickname and the second part became my official name 🤷‍♀️

2. When was the last time you cried?

Maybe April last year, I had a massive fight with someone and burst into tears 😭 Yeah I don't cry that often, more of a let the agonies eat you alive from the inside kinda person

3. Do you have kids?

No and I don't want them either :)

4. Do you use sarcasm?

Nah, idk who she is 🤷‍♀️

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Usually how they treat waiters at a restaurant irl and how angry they get over little things, massive red flag for me. Online, it's def based on how rude they are to people over stupid small stuff. I'll either soft block or straight up unfollow if your idea of fun is putting people down constantly or just being a general dick about fandom stuff that should be fun 🤷‍♀️

6. What’s your eye colour?

Brown eyes like Ed :))

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

I am a massive chicken when it comes to horror! I like the idea of it but I actually do get scared so so much 😭 I can do horror podcasts though but movies/shows etc give me actual sleepless nights. Happy endings all the way babyyy!

8. Any special talents?

Not really, I guess once I watch a show/movie and if I like it (pay attention), I kinda don't need a rewatch for the next year, I can play bits over in my mind if needed lmao

9. Where were you born?

In a hospital where a lot of people in my family were born (strange question!)

10. What are your hobbies?

Reading, puzzles, drawing, and writing :')

11. Do you have any pets?

Yes, I have a dog called Bilbo who recently turned 10. My parents have 4 other dogs called Casper, Eva, Chi, and Tingmo ❤️

12. What sports do you play/have played?

My right knee is busted and I hate physical exercise so I don't play anything adfjvdbf but I used to play cricket in school ✌️ Ooh and I was on the debate team which is a sport to me ahem

13. How tall are you?

5’5”

14. Favourite subject in school?

English, art, economics (yeah Im a giant nerd)

15. Dream job?

Exactly what I'm doing right now, but when I was a kid, I wanted to be a writer :)

I'm gonna tag @ella-doe @talkstoself @sherlockig and @aha-my-villainous-thoughts (no pressure obv and feel free to lmk if you hate getting tagged in stuff like this)

[slutnali]

From my understanding the people on twitter were more upset with her response to biblegirl, who tweeted something along the lines of “the sooner we accept that most adults do cocaine the better” (not the exact wording, she deleted it now cause the response was overwhelmingly negative, but the sentiment was normalizing cocaine use bc it’s prevelant) and Denali responded “tea”. To me that’s a lot more 🤔what do u mean by that🤔 than anything she said on the podcast.

This is long so I'm adding a read more out of curtesy and also because we are talking about drugs [not very descriptive but still]

I remember seeing that earlier while I was out but don't remember it word for word, wish I did tho

But from what I remember, I thought there was some truth to it. Many people do it, it's not just rampant in the lgbt+ community but everywhere else. Does it make it okay? Absolutely not but from what I took from it is that there's just so much shaming for it and I think harm reduction should be discussed. That's not to say that you should glorify it and I don't think they are, however its such a delicate & complicated topic that people are quick to jump at each others throats defending their stance, etc.. With Nali replying 'teaaa' I think also it has to do with the fandom's reaction to it as well.. like, it always gets weird?

I remember when s13 had been announced and people did their digging and found out about her mugshot etc.. the fandoms reaction gave me an ick because people were very much 'omg how scandalous teeheee 🤭" gossiping and theorizing it... and then again when she'd made a joke about her mugshot on the GITMS segment and then people were actually thirsting over it on twt.. like it was weird imo.. and yeah, she was open about it and to some extent you could argue "she made it our business" but I think this'll probably be the last time she does share about it and I don't think she owes us any more stuff about it if she doesn't want to. That's just me though.

Could the tweet have been worded better? Yeah, but again, the tweet from Biblegirl was deleted and I can't really go in depth. But tbh I don't want to go further into depth or back and forth after this ask and another i have, because this blog is mainly for reading [and occasionally writing] drag race fic and thirsting over my faves.

There def is a discussion to be had when it comes to people who have used it and people entirely against it, and there's many points to be shared on both sides. I've seen some of it while I was scrolling twt a while ago bc I follow a bunch of dr girls [obvs] and local queens.

As for Denali, if you no longer want to support her that's fine and your right. If you need/want to separate yourself from that, do it and if you're a follower or mutual of mine that wants to unfollow me there's no hard feelings. If you do wanna keep following me you can black list 'denali foxx' and 'denali' so you wont see posts with her tag. I cant speak for everyone else who may not tag but I can for my blog because I always use them and tag accordingly.

Drug use and talk happens and it's not a cancelable offense, in my opinion at least. There are many many queens who openly talk about substance use but I rarely even see anyone bring it up: Willow and a bunch of s14 girls doing shrooms, Camden talking about how blackout she was while touring last year and not knowing how she got safe to her hotel room, Sasha C mimes sniffing coke or smoking on stage, all the open stoners, etc.. when it comes to this and other topics people are very pick and choose when it comes to their faves so idk..

but again, this is all my opinion and ramble and its okay if we have a difference.

[ghostslimu]

introduction :3

hi!! the ... uhh.... well. sure is a system here. :3 we haven't decided on a system name yet

i'm what u could consider the host, more or less! i go by virgil (he/they) :3 linksss: our youtube channel :3 our (terrible) music this blog is about everything we enjoy. we talk about writing, drawing, mental illness, system stuff, memes... yeah :3). no consistent topics or aesthetic, just whatever we enjoy. almost no reblogs because we're kinda scared of interacting with people + mainly use this to express ourselves, but feel free to like and rb our posts!

some regular struggles:

oh, yk... depression, anxiety, whatever we were diagnosed with at 13

bpd/npd/other cluster b things possibly

autism/adhd

system stuff... obviously

the dread we feel over slowly going deaf

asthma, for some reason

chronic pain/low immune system yeaaa

if u have an issue with any of these, feel free to block. don't be rude. we don't care who blocks or unfollows us, feel free to do what's best for u.

dni:

basic criteria

proshipper (it's triggering to us, sorry, but no discourse lol)

believe in narcissistic abuse/are a dick to cluster b people

fakeclaim people/systems (REGARDLESS of origin)

exclusively nsfw blogs (our suffering isn't hot)

TERFS. RADFEMS. don't even look at my blog. this isn't enrichment for u

a few people who will be active on this blog: (note: none of the art belongs to us obv!! appearances are more or less based on inner world appearances or personal preferences :))

kurt

protector/caretaker/kinda system manager

he/him

27

salem

co-host/protector

she/they

vampire

16

griffin

little guy... extroverted alter

he/him

15+

mici

traumaholder

they/he

ghost/vampire

14+

others:

clown, it/its, mime

millie, she/her, australian shepherd dog

g, she/her, talking vase (griffin's little sister)

for now, we are not comfortable with featuring our introjects and littles on here! we might still mention them (not by name), but please don't pressure us into giving more information about their age/trauma/source!! :,)) sometimes we may use other pronouns for our alters when referring to them, but please stick to the ones listed here!! also, please no syscourse. don't ask us for our stance on endo systems. we find discourse very stressful and traumatizing and wish to not engage. just be nice please!!

[bcofl0ve]

Respectfully, Austin does not know or care that Olivia unfollowed him. He will probably never know because he is not on there ever. And he’s definitely not scrolling through all his followers. So no he’s not going to jump on and unfollow her finstas. Everyone wants this to be a bigger deal than it is, I’m sure out of boredom. Austin has his own life, and a gf of nearly two years. And Olivia has her own life as well. I don’t think they were that close of friends. We all tell people to move on from Austin and V since that’s been 4 years. This has also been 3 years since filming elvis. Both of their lives are in different places now. I’m not gathering where people get evidence they were super close over the years. Also olivia has done nothing since elvis. That can’t be blamed on the strike. If she is happy following other people around, more power to her. But I hope she focuses on acting after the strike is over. That doesn’t have anything to do with Austin, but just an annoyance I have with her since I enjoyed her in the movie, and hoped she would do other things.

oh his ass def didn't notice LOL i don't think he has one of those apps like i had in middle school that tells you who unfollowed you. ik i made a quip to someone on twitter about the finstas but yeah short of her removing him as a follower on there he'll follow them until he's old and gray (nor do i think she really uses them anymore anyways)

i also want her to work again (after the strike obv), i'm with you 100% there! i want her to go back to horror, and i say that as someone who can't stomach most horror films bc i get icked out by even slight gore. i'm trying to build my tolerance haha. but i liked better watch out and think she does well in the genre. i also thought she did amazing in undertow, which is more creepy drama than it is horror but. she does unnerving good all in all!

ty for the civility- it genuinely is appreciated dearly by me.

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

sometime in this last week, or this week coming, my blog has turned/turns 10. god. a decade old. a whole ass chunk of my life i’ve spent on this hellsite. when i began on here, i was a kid. a lost, lonely, depressed and anxious 15/16 year old kid. a kid scared of her future. a kid confused about her future. what to do for uni. to change schools or not??? to do drama/acting at uni or english/philosophy or to move 8hrs away to another regional uni to “escape” her “washed up, dead end hometown” that was so typical of all the pop-punk music that she was listening to at the time.

she was a tad overdramatic, loud, “funny” (as described by her school friends) and terribly forgetful in regards to homework and school assignments. she was angry at the world, most especially the catholic school she was fucking sick and tired of attending. but she was convinced that since she was the so-called “funny girl”, that she simply couldn’t be depressed or anxious. she believed herself unloveable because she didn’t look like a weird mixture of hayley williams and emo-pop queen lights. but now, i no longer believe that i have to look like the women that i looked up to in the ~emo scene~. fuck beauty standards. i am loveable.

in the years since joining tumblr, i’ve managed to get through business college, my undergrad degree and, well, failed out of postgrad due to obvious burnout and health issues amongst other things. although i’ve lost many friends irl and many followers/mutuals online on here. for those who’ve stuck around to see me get through all of this, thank you. to all the friends/casual mutuals that have since deactivated or only followed me for a short time then unfollowed; thank you.

like obviously i was never/have never been a massive popular blog on here, like thebootydiaries or vampireapologist (who has since deactivated a couple of months ago) with tens of thousands of followers. my follower count is still close to the 8,000 range at 7,892. obviously that’s still a lot of people (and of course, porn bots lmao and many, many non-active blogs), enough like one super old post from like 2012 tumblr pointed out, enough for a small to medium sized city or town, or something like that. i don’t know how many people i’ve really reached. i really don’t know how i actually amassed this small army of people.

i am aware though, that on other platforms like snapchat (lmao does anyone even use it anymore in 2021???)/instagram/youtube/tiktok etc, i’d PROBABLY be considered as some type of ~micro influencer (🤮🤮)~. hell, i actually had a bot slide into my notes about being one on here on this hellsite back in 2019. i don’t know if i’ve ever actually ~influenced~ anyone on here with my shitposts (when i started making some) or my personal posts. i don’t know my reach. even though, now, i do occasionally get featured on buzzfeed listicles (although pay me buzzfeed along with the OPs of those original embedded posts), i still don’t know how many people i’ve reached… and even with my very occasional checks of google analytics lmao. on top of this, grappling with the loss of followers at times is much, much easier than it was when i began on here and the first few years following that. i know that my follower count doesn’t determine my worth and stuff.

but over these 10 years, i have grown. i turn 26 this year. back in 2011, 15/16yo me never thought she’d be here. she was partially down the suicidal thoughts hole, with things about ~picturing her funeral and wondering who’d bother to turn up. if only she could pretend to be dead for a day to see who’d give a fuck~ and 16-18yo me was defs down it with her HSC hellscape thoughts in 2012/2013. that 3rd floor tafe/tech women’s bathroom window drop and the thought of scarring her class for life (and that cool dude from catholic school that she crushed on who ended up at tafe with her) with jumping out of it onto the concrete below. instead, she just posted on fb about ~being a failure~ etc which ultimately did lose her a bunch of facebook friends lmao. it was practically the same thing. her mental breakdown after the end of her hsc, where she let her earrings go green and get infected in her ears because “fuck self care, bc what the fuck is it??? i’ll never get better! let me fucking wallow in my self loathing bc it’s the only thing that i’m fucking good at!!!” so i no longer have my ears pierced. oh! it was just all too fucking much!!

i am happier today. i no longer have those semi-suicidal thoughts. hell, i almost died in 2020 from a fucking bowel aneurysm, after my stomach tumour excision surgery. that forced me to put things into perspective. i appreciate the little things . i appreciate the very few friends that i actually have. yes. i’m still depressed and anxious. some days are still shitty and hard. but nowhere as hard and shitty as they were back when i began on here 10 years ago.

how the fuck last 10 years have gone past, with my ass on here; clearing out my blog and caring more about doing that than my uni work (lmao whoops); having made some lifelong friends both internationally (from the US) and long distance domestically in australia, it’s been a long ride; i honestly have no fucking idea. obviously over these past 10 years, i’ve debated with myself over and over and over again whether i should delete/deactivate this account or not. would it make me healthier??? more than likely. but then when i have meltdowns or just inner ramblings i have to get out somewhere, where else to post??? on fb?? obvs not. it’s “attention seeking” or the like on there. no one will read them. no one will resonate. but on here??? even if i got/get one “like” in the notes or one “yo i feel this” response in the tags or replies, it feels like i’ve reached someone??? okay yeah. i know this place IS NOT therapy and i’m not using my followers as amateur (or probs even actual professional) armchair psychologists…. which is a thing i think people need to stop doing internet-wide: but that’s a whole other post that i reblogged a few days ago lmao. i really need to get another therapist, actually lmao.

but it’s the community i’ve found hard to leave. i have what feel like friends, when i’ve never been employed (still as of yet); and when all of my irl friends/acquaintances are working and doing the whole ~adulting~ and ~grown up life~ thing right. it’s also the frenzied rabidness of spite with hating staff’s godawful ideas. the memes. oh the memes. and also the RaWrInG 20s XD emo scene reemergence on here that’s kept me here. the messy petty drama from time to time of big blogs fighting it out.

this place really is bizarre and fun sometimes. and also the fact that i can still hide behind the ridiculous “roaring pikachu” URL that i made all those years ago. i am anonymous. it’s freeing. but on fb it’s all like “WHY WONT YOU ADD A BANNER IMAGE AND TELL US 20 FUN FACTS ABOUT YOU!!!!!???? LET PEOPLE WHO HAVENT SPOKEN TO YOU IN 10 YEARS KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU BECAUSE WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE!!!” and the same goes for Corporate Hellscape Facebook™️ (linkedin) but in the professional sense instead. y’all know fuck all about me really. besides my posts. and i love that and live for that. okay yeah. y’all know more about my mental health than my fb feed obvs… which is probably a terribly unfortunate thing. but still.

over the last 10 years then, my superiority complex for being ~so original and intelligent~ or whatever the fuck i had in high school, has all but ebbed away. i’m not that smart just because i went to uni. hell, i literally did NONE of my in-class work and none of my philosophy readings in uni….. so i have fuck all idea of how i got through undergrad like that lmao. i’m not original when so many people can articulate the same thoughts that i have, but like, sometimes better, on a post (even though sometimes/most of the time the Tumblr User Hot Takes Tuesday™️ takes on here are fucking awful lmao). but still. originality is not something i really have anymore. or really had in the first place lmao.

so will i deactivate after these 10 years, like i’ve been saying for so, so long??? i honestly have no idea. but just know. thanks guise. have a nice gpoy selfie day XD. grab your wands. your tardises. grab your war paint. grab your whatever the fuck other fandom specific stuff that was one that hella cringe post from 2011 til 2015 random tumblr. that relic is as old as time itself. just as this mysterious roaring pikachu is for someone whose too loyal to leave this W E B B E D H E L L S I T E that’s just as much of a train wreck as she is. lmao.

[lesbianphan]

//

[demonsfate]

munday topics ! // accepting // @electricea asked . . . 6, 7 and 8

6. excessive ooc

Honestly... for the MOOOST part, I don't care about "excessive ooc". even though I tend to worry that I post too much ooc LOL. yes, ppl can have "personal blogs" to post ooc stuff to but like. I just understand that behind the muses, there is a real person with real feelings who might wanna share lil details of their lives. Especially when they have more followers on their rp blogs who are more likely to listen & respond than their personal blog does.

There are a couple scenarios where I will draw the line. That being if there is just no in character content. Like they've been logging on every day for weeks just to make several ooc posts and nothing more. Then I may unfollow just because, at that point, I question if I'll ever be able to actually write with them because they're not giving any ic stuff lol. Or when like they just SPAM the dash with reblogs that have NOTHING to do with their muses. I'm not saying musings or aesthetics posts - because those still pertain to the muse. I'm saying when they reblog stuff from other fandoms that have zilch to do with their blog. For example, it'd be like if I were to start reblogging lots of Death Note, lots of Supernatural, and lots of Bluey despite the fact that my blog is Tekken lol. Now that I find annoying bc I'm wondering really WHY can't you use a personal for that? Of course, ppl are always free to do what they want with their blogs - but that's one thing I don't get.

7. DNIs in rules

I'm like what you were saying, I will follow them if it's somebody I know I'm not gonna end up writing with anyone due to different fandoms or having never followed each other. Or if like, they have concrete proof that this person is to be avoided. But liiiiike... when ppl just drop a username in a DNI and has no other available information... I just can't help but wonder if that person did anything or if it was a personal spat between the two muns. Especially because I've been a personal "victim" of ppl telling their mutuals to not interact with me, that I should just delete, and saying just horrible untrue garbage about me. All because I wrote with sb they didn't like. (Though they were also infamous about pretending to be somebody's friend, then dropping them and suddenly acting like they're the Worst Person Ever with no actual evidence)

I understand if muns wanna set boundaries even if they simply don't like the other person, or they had a personal drift or whatever. But like... I'm gonna be honest, there are def ppl in the RPC that I don't care to see on my dashboard. But I don't think I'll ever have a DNI. I just use X-Kit, X-Kit Rewritten, and the Tumblr block feature to avoid them. Which yes, sometimes they might still "slip through" but like... if I just see them once in a blue moon, it's not gonna matter much to me. And this even applied to those who bullied me as I mentioned above.

So yeah, I do try to follow DNIs if it's one of my mutual, but I do often question the validity (sorry but with the past, I can't help but to) and well... I also have to apologize if I end up writing with sb in a "DNI" because I swear it feels like more and more ppl are having DNI lists now and it's like... when you're following nearly 200 people, it's probs hard to remember who's in a DNI and who's not, y'know? But like I also said, usually those in DNI lists tend to be in different fandoms than I am, anyway.

8. reblog karma

I don't follow it. I mean, of course, I'll always reblog posts from the source & send people in one (WHEN it's applicable. Obvs I'm not gonna send a smut / ship meme to somebody who my muse has no relation with) But like... people rarely follow reblog karma so I just see little point in enforcing it lol. Like even IF somebody does reblog from the source, you can always tell they reblogged it from you without sending you one. And honestly? I don't get wtf people even do that for when it comes to munday asks or headcanon asks. Like why? There is literally zero excuse for it. Shy? Send it through anon. It doesn't fit your character? It doesn't have to because it's just asking my character / or the mun a question. Like literally. That shit actually annoys me but again. What can you do? I'm not gonna demand ppl ... but I still never understand it.

And I understand some ppl say it clogs up the activity if it's reblogged straight from them. But honestly... I've just never had that problem before lmao. Like I've had personal blogs reblog memes I've made and those memes can get up to 20+ notes, and it still never bothers me. (Especially when a lotta times in Modern Tumblr Age, notifs for a single post tends to become one block)

I could actually complain more about this but uhhhh. I think I'll leave it at that. djfndjsf

[diannaly]

what’s up

hi everyone! just wanted to fill you all in on a few things because i feel i owe you all an explanation? 

tw: mention of racism, depression and death (not that bad tho)

i know most of my followers here followed me because i post ts2, but that’s going to be changing. i do still plan on posting ts2...WHEN MY GAME DECIDES TO FUNCTION. i just redownloaded ts3 and okay, a brief history: ts3 was my one true love growing up, it was the sims game i played for over a decade and it was what helped me cope with the passing of my grandmother and severe social anxiety as a kid, racist abuse by white kids at school and a bunch of other shit. it was my escape. so for these reasons, ts3 holds a very special place in my heart, HOWEVER, i wasn’t able to get it to work on any of my computers for years up until a few days ago (about two weeks now) and it’s literally all i’ve been playing. when it comes to ts2, i’m honestly far more active on my cc finds blog: @s2-cc because i still consistently reblog things on there. not everyday, obv, but i try to be as consistent as i can with the time i have.  ALSO, recently (since about 4-5 days ago) I’ve been trying to get my ts2 game to function. 🙃 because originally, i was planning on playing both ts2 and ts3 cause i love them both. i was in the middle of doing a hood overview video for my YT channel this past monday and the game crashed three times on me. i’ve been trying to get it fixed, updated, turning on vsync, graphics rules, texture memory so on and so on, etc. everything you can think of (yes, i mean that) and nothing’s worked - i’m at my wits end tbh and so i’ve just...taken a break. i can’t deal with spending 6+ hours on my pc trying to fix it so when i’m ~in the mood, i’ll attempt it again. when this will happen? idk. that’s why i say my content will be changing but i do still plan on posting ts2. just depends on when i get over the frustration of having to DEAL. 

as mentioned previously, i will keep my ts2 cc finds blog active. i still like ts2 cc posts (and wish i could download and actually use them :’)) and i still reblog a bunch of stuff and have more stuff lined up...so feel free to, again, follow me there. the stuff on this personal blog will be changing though, but lbr, i hardly post on here anyway lol. so yeah, feel free to unfollow me if you so choose, i totally understand, you do you. but if you play/like ts3 stuff as well, then feel free to stick around for the 2-3 ts3 posts i’ll be making lulz. i also have a ts3 cc finds blog here: @s3-cc. if you are subscribed to me on youtube, then yes, this applies for that platform as well, which i *really* didn’t want to do cause i know most of my subs are ts2 players :’) but yeah, i’ll see what i can do with my game to get it working again and even if i don’t play it in a while, i think i’m still gonna try making videos about it?? somehow?? idk. NEWAYS, that’s all. thanks for reading. ✌🏽

[crossedwithblue]

tbh i had forgot the katara as jane i just remembered the zuko being stupid haha the post being ss well makes it great (i suppose they mean the narrative function of being the support and a contrast with lizzy. but yeah comparing her to katara who has such strong independence and standing up values sounds '???')

I read a lot zutara mainly because katara and aang getting together was always super uncomfortable to me

i am always here for Dumbass Zuko headcanons lmao. however I did unfollow that blog just the other day because while I love their art (give me allllllllll the accurately drawn PoC. if you draw PoC (or white people for that matter) as button-nosed instagram girls with dark skin and make no effort to learn how to actually draw different types of facial features i will come to your house and make you eat your wacom tablet and draw my giant nose and square jaw with pen and paper until you get it Right, there are enough resources about this and i am tired) I didn’t love their hot takes which I obviously did not want to say in the tags on their post but idk,,, I was getting this really bitter vibe from their meta, idk how else to explain it. I can understand being bitter about aspects of media you like and of course people are perfectly entitled to their opinions and headcanons, but I just don’t want that bitterness on my dash lol, I come to tumblr to shitpost and look at pretty pictures. and their opinions on zuko were definitely part of it bc they felt really unfair to me and the Pride and Prejudice post is def an example of something where I was just like ??? this makes perfect sense until I actually think about it at all?? why are you being mean to zuko for no apparent reason????? is it.... because he’s the only major character from the nation that is most similar to white colonising cultures, even though he’s doing the work to a) be aware of the colonising mentality he’s internalised and work on it and b) as the ruler of said nation, flag up and eradicate this mentality from his own country, which is evidenced by the FN’s policy of non-intervention in Korra (I think the almost-going-to-war plot in the comics was absolute bullshit by the way, like not its existence but just it not really being examined in that sense)? I am 100% here to examine those aspects of ATLA and again, I totally understand being bitter about them, but it just tires me out in a website I consider a leisure space

I do need to find more atla blogs to follow now, recs would be fab if you have any :)

oh yeah i basically dont ship any of the endgame ships (in ATLA, as you may guess from my header being Korrasami lol) because as i have said before, nobody needs to find their One True Love at the age of 13 lmao (i do kinda ship Suki/Sokka because they are a little older (still kids by our standards but most probably near adulthood by their own, if not actually adults in the full sense, and yes I do think cultural context matters when ascribing adulthood to people outside the modern West no matter what ‘you’re a baby until you turn 18 and then why don’t you instatnly have a job and a mortgage’ internet culture says) and their relationship is just so cute and feels really healthy to me idk we were Robbed of enough Suki screentime, we should have got more Suki and also she should have had her character explored a Lot more than Cool Ninja Feminist Gal) (also, witness the nested brackets, they are here)

I think a lot of people have issues with Zutara (and presumably by extension Zukka? though I haven’t seen this discussed as much or like. at all) because of the issues associated with essentially the heir to a colonizing empire which has decimated the culture of the indigenous-coded woman he’s being shipped with (im sure you’ve also seen those discussions if you’ve spent like. any time at all in ATLA fandom lol) which I... kinda have mixed feelings about, I’ve seen fics where it is definintely completely ignored and done really really badly but I have also seen fics where that conflict is a really essential theme and that’s been quite interesting (would recommend Southern Lights on AO3 if ou haven’t come across it before as a good example of that though it is very long and currently being updated (pretty regularly)). I feel like I’m too removed from that part of intercultural conflict that I have the right to comment on it, though I’ve definitely faced shades of those issues in the past, but I also feel like it’s potentially an example fo knee-jerk Tumblr purity culture to just say its Bad And Wrong so idk I’m conflicted.

In the politics of the world, I just don’t see how Katara being Fire Lady (ugh that’s a phrase that always makes me laugh, and not in a kind way), which is probs the most comon Zutara fic plot, would have Worked in any sense at all, and I definitely think she would have wanted to stay at he South Pole and rebuild her culture and bring bending back to them (as we see in the comics and obvs with her being Korra’s waterbending master iirc) and I can see Zuko wanting to help with that in whatever way possible because he rightly sees that as a really important part of the reparations owed by the Fire Nation. and obviously by the end of the series they were very good friends and definitely had better chemistry than fricking Kataang but yeah those reasons are basically why I don’t love Zutara but don’t necessarily hate it either

this was another ramble, not apologising for it this time because this is just what talking to me is like. I am very here for bringing back letter-writing because it lets me ramble to my heart’s content but also it would take up All My Time

[taeyongsbroadshoulders]

B how did u get into bts?? I feel like one day it was all Harry and the next u were creating a side blog lmao no shade or anything!! Just curious!!

oh boy.... this is gonna be a long one BUCKLE UP we’re going all the way back... to the Beginning.... (also i legit wrote Too Much so its under the cut sorry she balled Too Hard)

okay SO the first time i heard of them was in?? 2015 i wanna say?? anyway a ton of people i knew from here and saw on twitter started talking about them and reblogging them (i unfollowed all of them too.. I am Fake look where we are now LMAO) and i straight up was like I Do Not Get This

and then i didn’t hear a ton about them for a bit (bc.. unfollowing and avoiding for whatever reason lmao) and then in 2017 i started working for the football team and we had a group at halftime who was doing choreography and they sent me a clip of music they were using and it was Not Today by BTS??? and i heard it and was like ummmmmmm this fucking... slaps.... no..... and i was so mad bc i was so determined to Not be into them even tho i listened to that clip she had sent me like 20 times skgjdlgjdkgl (again... Fake)

then a little while later also in 2017 i heard Mic Drop and i was like okay..??? OKAY....... they have bangers?? absolute tunes out here??? but throughout this whole time the only other thing about them i had ever really seen was how feral their fans were and so i was Very scared and intimidated lmao but i would secretly listen to Mic Drop regularly... and from then on for a few years i would keep up with them (casually, normally, very much in a completely uninterested way obvs 👀) when they would perform on american shows (like when they did Mic Drop on jimmy kimmel in 2017, a couple years where they performed on some of those new years eve shows) and i thought they were SO talented especially in their dancing and everything but again.. kept at arms length...

anyway from there i would just randomly obsessively watch their mic drop music video and then move on (read: me last year) so i was just dabbling here and there for YEARS.. and i think legit one of the only things that stopped me from going All In this whole time was an overall reluctance but also that i never really saw enough of them to latch onto a Fave?? and you know ya girl always needs a fave to obsess over lmao

so fast forward now to this year when Carpool Karaoke came out... and there was Tae in his floppy haired glory in the back corner of the vehicle doing  nothing but serving absolute face and looking fine as Fuck and i was like okay 👀👀 OKAY👀👀 so then I was Looking and Looking Hard

aaaannnndddd here we get to a couple months ago when I had just moved and was a week out from starting a new job so obvs my brain was like “U NEED A HYPERFIXATION RIGHT! NOW!” and so i sort of just randomly started looking up more of their performances and seeing how absolutely balls to the wall talented they are and then getting to know their personalities a bit more and stuff and then... i was In.... which also coincidentally coincided with my mutual kelly @fleetwoodcherry / @taespajamas getting into BTS and Tae specifically so i started seeing Him more and was IMMENSELY COMPELLED to say the least... and being the most susceptible bitch in the world to cute boys who dance and sing it was a true recipe for a Fixation and now here we are !

so yeah it’s legit been a years-long battle that i finally gave into.. oh how the TURNS HAVE TABLED... but anyway im here now and i sucked in a couple of my friends and im having a GREAT fucking time so much serotonin i am v grateful for them and a lil mad i didnt get into them earlier but u know what im here now and that’s what matters

anyway this was a literal novel thank u for asking ive been lowkey waiting to ~~tell my story and i had a great time fjgdfklg