I am a bit disappointed with how I've been treating myself lately. Like, I care for myself and everything in terms of hygiene, nutrition, rest, etc., but I honestly could be more responsible and conscious. For example, I'm very very behind on my chores, and they keep piling up and I'm extremely overwhelmed because I don't know where to start now. There's something to pick up and fix in every single corner of my apartment, but after I finish work I just want to savor my few hours of freedom and I start doing something else or I go out. I could maybe ask my bf to help me clean one weekend, but then again... the number of hours we have together is actually not so large, etc. Plus I'm bad at chore distribution because I'm too used to doing everything myself. But I should perhaps not overthink this.
Another issue is MY BODY! I'm staying up late, my posture is abysmal while I work, I don't stretch and other than trying to take a walk every evening I don't move much either. I try to eat balanced and healthy but I feel I've been overdoing fast food; I used to have it like once a week and lately I've been having it more often than that. I also eat snacks and sweets, and I'm noticing some weight gain that's not significant but to me it's noticeable because I'm not used to it and it's kind of throwing me off. I'm trying not to make a thing out of it and slip back into my old habits. And smoking is another enemy I'm making, although I'm trying to be aware of that and not let it grow. I used to smoke 🍃 only on weekends and maybe days off last year, but I've started to do it on weekdays now and then, and I really don't like how it's making me feel. I've been cutting back on that. Other than that there's the occasional social cigarette which I guess existed in the past too, but now that I go out more and everyone I hang out with smokes, I've started to feel the need to do it just to have something to do with my hands, or if I have a drink. AND I've also been drinking which I never do. Nothing wild, like once a week 1-2 glasses of wine, or a beer, or 1-2 shots. I only have my coworkers to blame for this because they're really heavy on the pressure, and I used to be adamant about my boundaries, but recently I feel like I won't have fun if I don't drink. Which is completely asinine. I think I need to get back into having stronger boundaries and discipline.
Some more poison I torture my body with is constant screen time. If I'm not working in front of the laptop I'm on my phone, and if I'm not on my phone I'm on my personal laptop, like right now (it's so nice to type on lol). I miss those days where I'm so caught up in stuff that I forget or don't need to check my phone all day. I haven't had one of those in a long time, but I'm planning to. Being with my boyfriend helps too. I also want to get back into reading, I've even managed to arrange all of the books I have here on a shelf on my balcony. Very soon it's going to be a whole year since I started reading a book and never finished it lmao. That saddens me a lot, but I'm determined to finish it before its 1 year anniversary.
On the positive side, the weather is getting nicer and warmer everyday, days are getting longer and I wish I could be outside all day long! I try to avoid thinking about that because I get extremely hopeless at having zero time for myself because of my job. I seriously believe it's at the root of most of the issues I described here. But I live for the warm evenings, the weekends, and summer plans!
I do think it's worthless to try to argue with the "amount of screen time = relative significance" crowd, but I really cannot stress enough how great this episode was for me personally, as an Essek stan.
I was doing the math between the mention of the war in the prelude (instead of a more general, 'since the Mighty Nein largely parted ways') and Trent saying, "Don't you want to know what I have?" and sat in my chair for ten minutes before Trent actually said it like, "Surely this man is not about to threaten Essek. That is way too much wish fulfillment for me personally. There is no way that's what he's about to say." AND THEN.
Fundamentally my opinions of an episode are not predicated on whether my fave was physically in attendance, nor even whether he was relevant, but it does show how reductive the measurement of screen time is as a metric considering Trent didn't even have to mention Essek by name to drag his living soul in kicking and screaming to briefly haunt this narrative.
this is just a quick head's up that if you see any 'The World Has Been Changed' shirts/other merch for sale anywhere besides my INPRNT shop, it's stolen and any sales from it will NOT go to charity - just to the thief.
if you really want the design as a shirt, I've uploaded the t-shirt version to dropbox for personal use. (like, you take the file to a printing company and get a shirt made for yourself/your loved ones. no commercial use.)
ANYWAYS if you see the design for sale anywhere it's not supposed to be, feel free to report it. I don't have the time to monitor all the theft of my art, so go ahead and give em hell if you notice it happening 🙏
He stood in the center of a busy street surrounded by extravagant lights, reds, greens, and whites all shining down on him and lighting up the area despite the late hour. The snow that had begun was light enough to not obscure the view quite yet; merely a small scattering of flurries before a potentially bigger storm. He stood with an uneven but genuine little smile as Mikoto held up his phone, peeking around the edge of it for a moment to smile back before snapping a picture.
A little moment that stuck with me from @lostxmelody 's beautiful fic, Life's Reflection! There were so many amazing scenes, but of course a big sap like me would latch onto this one...
You know, while we don't think Stuck In My Head/Mind The Gap were bad episodes or anything, we kinda wish they'd been cut in favor of making that time the part one to The Battle of Big Wand, with the actually episode being part two. Make it a whole big forty to forty-five special instead of trying to fit it with a twenty-two to twenty-three minute run time
We actually like everything they were trying to do with the special, but we just wish they had more time to flesh things out and play around with the jokes between the plot moments. The writers probably didn't really have much of a choice with the time they were given to work with and had to prioritize where screen time was used, and honestly they did what they could, but sometimes it felt like 'and now this is happening so we can get moving with the plot'
okay but like it means so much to me that marco genuinely had so much faith and admiration for jean, long before jean really did anything to clearly merit it. like when marco knew jean, jean was still kinda a sheltered brat, but marco saw through the bravado and recognised how much goodness there was and how much potential for leadership he had, and he loved him for it. and like, not only did marco express this to jean (so like maybe one could think that he was just exaggerating or trying to build jean up), but he tells eren about how highly he thinks of jean. like marco was out here being jean's cheerleader to possibly the least receptive person in the 104th with a smile on his face. and that's another thing!! jean makes marco smile!! the thought of jean makes marco smile like a maniac and i just-