#listen here you give me a powerful woman and the man who loves her unconditionally devotedly infinitely

[burn-for-me-baby]

there’s nothing more important

[chateautae]

maybe i do | kth. III

➵ summary :  maybe you love each other, maybe you don’t. when a deal between your fathers leaves you forcefully wedding kim taehyung, arguably seoul’s most powerful CEO, you’re prepared for a loveless marriage of eternal regret and unhappiness. but maybe, it doesn’t turn out that way after all.

↳  part of the high-class series!

➵ pairing : taehyung x reader

➵ genre :  arranged marriage!au, ceo!tae, s2l!au, eventual smut, fluff, angst

➵ rating : 18+

➵ word count : 17k (im sorry omg)

➵ warnings : oh boi we have aNgSt, serious familial issues, swearing, multiple fight scenes, mainly verbal but there is a slap in one, mentions of a wound, mentions of alcohol, (there’s honestly a lot that goes wrong in this chapter but at least tae and the reader have each other), sexual tension :o, bit of possessive!tae, (i mention a short reader a lot but i just wanted to say you’re beautiful even if you’re tall! tae is just very tall to me askldjs)  

➵ a/n: i’m back and hoLY is this chapter loaded (and a lil unedited forgive me!!) i’ve finally finished school and get a whole month off now! who knows what works i’ll release in that time 👀. as always, feedback is appreciated loves!

chapter three : “the window opened one time with you and me”

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“Mother?” You stood frozen, completely and utterly shocked as to how your mother was just opposite of you, smiling brightly as if she hadn’t done a single thing wrong in her life and loved you unconditionally.

How incredibly wrong that was. 

“Y/N! How are you? Oh dear, it’s been so long!” Your mother threw her arms around your neck, pulling you against her for a hug you just barely returned. 

“Good. You?” 

“Oh, I’m great!” She beamed.

“What are you doing here?” You inquired, shutting the door after her entry.

“Ah, I just couldn’t believe my daughter’s married now, I wanted to drop by and say congratulations!” Your mother cheered, grinning widely as she began scanning the grand interior of your house, leering as though you weren’t standing just before her.

“Drop by? You could’ve just came to the wedding, Mother...” You suggested despondently, plastering a pained smile onto your face. You attempted to meet her eyes, though they rather seemed to sparkle at anything that appeared expensive.

Anything but you. 

“Oh, I was in Ibiza. I couldn’t just leave while my resort pass still had benefits on it, you know me.” She flashed you a cheeky smile as she playfully hit you, propping her heels off.

You nodded half heartedly, trying extremely hard to not lose it on her because you were in your home; a place meant for peace and comfort and didn’t have room for negative.

Not to mention, Taehyung resided just upstairs in his study with most likely his door open, and you didn’t want to risk bothering him if you raised your voice. 

“Ibiza was more important than your own daughter’s wedding, huh?” You spoke to yourself, nodding in a manner that would somehow help you accept the sad fact, though instead called forth a feeling you should’ve grown accustomed to by now.

Disappointment.

She knew about the wedding, you knew your father informed her of the ceremony along with its date and time. Though as she audaciously ogled the embellishments of your front foyer and spoke to you carelessly, she practically screamed she gave 0 fucks about your wedding. That what really mattered to her was living out the full experience of an expensive vacation than attending a life-changing night for her daughter. 

Typical. 

“Oh, c’mon now. When you put it like that it makes me seem so bad.” Your mother pouted like a child. “It wasn’t a real marriage, anyway.” She waved off the conversation as she ventured further into the house, bold enough to strike another conversation . “My God, this is the house of the Kim Taehyung?” Your mother’s eyebrows shot up, drinking in the grand size and wealthy look of the home. “You got very lucky, Y/N.” 

You cocked an eyebrow, incredulous of what she was insinuating. “What do you mean, Mother?” 

“Y/N, you’re married to Kim Taehyung. Do you understand how fantastic that is? For you?” Your mother was on the verge of scoffing, smoothing over her dress as she looked elsewhere. “He’s an incredibly rich man, and considering that life of yours it’s a miracle he ever agreed to marry you.” Your mother relayed nonchalantly as she caught sight of an exquisite vase. 

And there it was, the belittling. You’d mentioned before you were often disparaged and received numerous insults when anything concerned your status as the runaway heiress. But what you failed to mention was the person who claimed the #1 position as your largest and most incessant hater. 

Your mother. 

“Mother, it doesn’t matter to me whether a man is rich or not.” You countered, trying to quell your snippy tone but it was as grand a fail your mother was at being a mother. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Unlike you, I’m not obsessed with my husband’s money.” You almost spat with crossed arms, only this comment causing her to turn towards you. 

“Excuse me? I’m your mother, watch your tone a little.” She scolded quite lightly, before returning to inspect a painting. 

You scoffed, “My mother...” you repeated under your breath, rolling your eyes. 

“No mumbling, Y/N. Speak up.”

“I said it’s funny you’re referring to yourself as my mother.” You voiced clearer.

“And why is that so funny?” You could visibly see your mother failing to control her temper with you, masking it all behind a fake smile she mastered ages ago. 

“Because you’ve been anything but a mother.” You retorted, knowing exactly what this conversation was leading into. 

An argument.

“And you’ve been daughter of the year?” Your mother countered, sarcastic tone cutting the air, and it only made you more irritated. 

“Here we go again, the bad daughter narrative.” You scoffed. “Find something new to argue, will you?” You narrowed your eyes.

“And you believe your bad mother narrative is any better?” She sneered back. “I’ve even come to visit you yet this it how you’re treating me. When will you ever learn to be grateful?”

“Please, you chose a vacation over your own daughter’s wedding.” You held a hand up, gesturing against her audacity. “And when have I ever been ungrateful? I don’t remember biting the hand that fed me.” 

“No, Y/N, you didn’t bite the hand that fed you, you completely neglected and abandoned it.” She claimed, drawing closer towards your direction. “You left this family to pursue your own selfish desires. You’re the very definition of ungrateful.” 

“Excuse me? Definition?” 

“Yes, definition. You threw everything your father worked so hard for away. All he ever wanted was to provide his family with a comfortable life, but you instead wasted his efforts and made everyone's lives so much harder. Do you really think I’ll forgive you for what you did to your older brother?” Your mother voiced in an accusatory tone, bringing up an age old argument you knew was going to ravage any peace between you two. 

“That was not my fault, he was already due for the same thing in Korea, it doesn’t matter if he’s in the U.S now.” You argued back. 

“It’s all your fault! You’re the reason Yoongi hasn’t been able to come home in years! You ruined his entire life by making him uproot and take over the U.S faction when it was your role. Your decision to leave forced him into it!” 

“So you’d rather have my life uprooted and ruined than your precious son’s?”

“Because my son isn’t like you! He isn’t selfish at all, Yoonie is a hard-working man who’s always listened to me and your father, always rightfully prioritized the company. But you? You’ve only ever made things worse. You’re completely useless, all you do is tear this family apart. Your father has to pick up your work, you keep your brother out of this country and give me years worth of stress!” Your mother shouted louder than she should’ve, angry as her eyes revealed searing frustration, contempt. 

You were trying to negate the hurt you felt by her words, having trained yourself to endure their sharp sting, though no matter how many times you heard them, it never made it any easier. 

“Oh please, your favouritism is showing, mother.” You remarked with near tears, her disregard for you so disturbingly apparent it left your eyes watering. 

“Yoongi has always loved his work and the company, but I never have. When will you understand that? If I’ve ruined our family so much why have I never heard these same words from Dad or Yoongi? They’ve always supported me, understood and loved me regardless of what life I chose. Why can’t you do the same? Why can’t you just try to understand me for once?” 

“Because there’s nothing to understand. You’re an heiress to this family, you are meant to live for this company and this company only. You owe your father and I your life, nothing has ever been yours. The least you could do to pay us back is by rightfully working at the company and not being as much of a disappointment as you are now.” You mother’s tone was strict and resolute, utterly fed up with you.

“Cry me a river, mother. I don't owe you a single thing. You’re one to talk about working alongside Dad and the company, all you’ve ever done is use his money without a single care for his work.” 

“Excuse me?” 

“You heard me, Mother, all you do is use Dad for his money. You know next to nothing about business or the company and have the least amount of right to lecture me about it. At least I’m not a woman who mooches off somebody and lives recklessly!” You snapped back at her with tears just pooling your lash line, arms crossed tightly holding your chest where it felt your heart would collapse.  

“Do you understand who you’re talking to? Speak with respect, Y/N, I am your mother.” She tried to finalize, but you weren’t having any of it. 

“And I could care less. You’ve never once done anything to warrant that title. All you’ve ever done is travel the world and bathe in the luxuries your husband affords you without ever being there for me or Yoongi. It was always dad despite being so busy, it was never you. You weren't even there for my wedding, when I needed my mother the most. No, you’re someone who’d rather use your rich husband and forget he’s a person.” Your voice was shaking at this point, practically rattling. “You may not have been there for my wedding, but I would never do that to my husband.” You let everything out without a care at the point, flooding the tense air. 

Your mother seemed to completely lose it at this, her tone scarily still as she gritted through her teeth. “You wouldn’t do that to your husband, really? Isn’t that exactly what you’re doing right now?” 

You flashed her an incredulous look. “Pardon?”

“You’re married to one of the richest men in Seoul, and you think you’re not doing the same thing? Whose house do you live in? Whose food do you eat? Whose lavish lifestyle do you now get to relish in? It’s all your husband’s, not yours.” Your mother was practically spitting venom at this point, scoffing. “I must say, your quest for independence is interesting, having landed you in the exact same place you always berated me for. Look where you are now, mooching off your rich husband.” 

If words could dagger you in the heart and looks could kill, you’d surely be 6 ft. under by now.

Years, years you’ve been stuck in this constant loop of back and fourth with your mother, arguing the same 5 things you could never see eye-to-eye on. And no matter what she said, no matter the insults, the belittling, the verbal abuse she always spat your way; you’d grown used to it. Her words became normal, second nature to you and so you easily drowned them out. Her insults became useless weapons you simply dodged and avoided. 

But this, this was where your mother won. 

Her words dawned a laughable sense of irony on you, nearly physically reeling as though someone had punched you in the gut at the realization. It was raw agony, the very prospect you’d spent the entirety of this ordeal evading. 

To think the same independence you fought so gravely for, can so easily be erased and forgotten all due to marrying a rich CEO. It felt pathetic, unfair you had no choice but to marry Taehyung. It wasn’t his fault he was rich, neither was it yours. 

It was just coincidence, pure and utter coincidence. But to think this very coincidence would be the reason your stomach is churning and self-worth is collapsing; it was fucking unfortunate, miserable. 

“Leave my house, this instance.” There was no emotion in your voice, it was flat, vision clouded.

“What did you say to me?” 

“I said get out!” You yelled, the shrill in your voice evidence of tears. “I don’t ever want to see you again!” 

“Don’t you dare raise your voice at me! I’m your mother!” 

“You’re not my mother at all, you’re the worst excuse of one. Leave my house!” 

“It’s not your house, Y/N! It’s your husband’s, and you will end up living the same life as me, using your husband for his money!” Your mother had somehow made her way over to you, having the audacity to push you back by your arms, driving her point home by the act of aggression. 

You gritted through your teeth, eyes teary. “I’ll never be like you, I’ll never be a cheap woman who only stays with a man for his money. A woman who probably cheats on her husband with wealthy men in other countries!”

This was the moment your mother gasped scandalously, becoming so irate she didn’t hesitate to raise her hand and slap you across the face. 

You stood emotionless, not even having the capacity to feel shocked or in pain due to how normal this was. There wasn’t a single unfamiliar thing about the sting of her hand, the way her manicured nails scratched against your skin and worse, the way her wedding ring usually cut into your cheek to produce a small wound. 

It was all too familiar, making you scoff as if this was exactly what you expected from her, exactly what you've always known. 

“You still hit your grown daughter, huh? The last 10 years of it weren’t enough?” You endured the ache, swallowing back tears. You weren’t letting them spill, not at this. 

Not at something as undeserving as your mother. 

“You give reasons to, Y/N.” Your mother simply crossed her arms and looked away, showing the slightest hint of shame though never allowing it to leak into the proud and egotistical persona she assumed around you. 

A suffocating silence pierced the air, looming for some time until you spoke. 

“Leave this house, mother. I beg of you.” You pleaded, not out of desperation, though out of sheer tiredness. Tiredness of the same argument and the same insults you always directed each other, tired of the same outcomes that only ever lead to more bitterness tainting your relationship. “Don’t make this any worse, we’ve probably disturbed Taehyung upstairs.” 

Your mother looked at you with lightly raised eyebrows, inquiring. “He’s home?” 

You nodded faintly. “Yeah, so leave.” 

“Am I not allowed to meet him?” Your mother seemed offended. 

“No, you’re not.” You stated firmly, not caring about the sliver of respect you thought you had for her and instantly pushing her towards your front entrance, nabbing her shoes along the way. 

“What are you-” She didn’t even get to finish her sentence before you swung the front door open, guiding her outside and shoving her shoes in her hands. 

She was about to retort until you shut the door on her, locking it. You leaned against the wood as you heard her protests, not minding her calls as you allowed your constrained tears to finally stream down your face. 

It was too much, she was too much. 

Why could your mother never see eye-to-eye with you? Why couldn’t she be a normal mother? Why couldn’t she be supportive? All she ever did was preach how useless you were, how selfish and ungrateful your very existence was.

Of course someone like her could never understand, never understand the value of autonomy and achieving something for yourself; she’s never once done anything along those lines in her entire life. 

Her words ran deeper today than they ever have, sending a stifling feeling to swarm your chest, your self-esteem and everything alike collapsing along with your pride.

It hurt, it really did. To hear those words from the very woman meant to love you so dearly, so unconditionally only exacerbated the pain. It made you jealous of every child you was gifted with a kind mother, not daring to curse anyone for it but simply feel it was unfair. Even Taehyung had such a warm and loving mother. 

Maybe that’s why Taehyung was so warm. 

Taehyung. 

You realized you were out in the open shedding tears where he could possibly see you, trying to silence the sobs that escaped your lips. You only failed, agony tightening your chest and growing more painful the more you held it all in. So you clutched your hand to your mouth and made straight for the kitchen sink, running the water loudly enough to drown out the sounds of you candidly crying. 

Your cheek still stung, your heart ached and your mind spun endlessly, all while trying to desperately rid yourself of the worthless feeling inside you. 

And it didn’t work. 

Taehyung had been working, scrolling through his laptop as he diligently reviewed status reports, only to have a notification brighten his phone screen. He flashed his occupied vision towards it and caught sight of his security system alerting him of his front door. 

He grew curious knowing the housekeepers were shopping for groceries at this hour, causing him to tap the notification and display the camera feed of his front porch. He was welcomed by a woman he’s never seen, peaking his curiosity. 

He almost rose from his seat until he saw the woman turn towards the door in accordance with you opening it, assuming you most likely knew her as she smiled brightly and ventured comfortably into the home. 

Taehyung shrugged it off and returned to his tedious reading, staring at the practically blurring lines of text until he eventually began hearing raised voices from downstairs, his ajar doors and grand home producing an echoing effect that reached his study. 

Taehyung cocked an eyebrow as he grew slightly worried, discerning it didn’t sound like a friendly conversation. He abandoned his work and made towards the doors of his study, peaking towards the direction of his stair railings that overlooked the first floor of his home. 

More of the conversation became apparent, and Taehyung instantly identified it sounded more like a negatively charged argument than a conversation. His eyebrows furrowed the more he listened, knowing it was bad manners to eavesdrop though finding himself doing so anyways. 

“You heard me, Mother, all you do is use Dad’s money. You know next to nothing about business or the company...” Taehyung’s eyebrows shot to the sky, realizing you were speaking to your mother; the same woman you explicitly expressed was to be avoided at all costs and even winced at the mention of. 

He couldn’t forget that from the first time he met you. 

“...Speak with respect, Y/N, I am your mother. ” The crudeness in your mother’s voice was already indicative of your ill relationship, the harshness sounding like second nature. 

Taehyung grimaced. 

“...All you’ve ever done is travel the world and bathe in the luxuries your husband affords you without ever being there for me or Yoongi...” Yoongi? As in your brother, Min Yoongi? Taehyung only loosely recalled Min Yoongi lived and worked in the States, where he headed your father’s lucrative faction there.

He’d only met the mellow, though diligent man a couple times before.

“...I would never do that to my husband.” Despite the intense situation, Taehyung felt the slightest tinge of pride hearing you refer to him as your husband.  

“You wouldn’t do that to your husband? Isn’t that exactly what you’re doing right now?” 

Oh fuck, Taehyung thought. This isn’t going anywhere good. 

“You’re married to one of the richest men in Seoul, and you think you’re not doing the same thing? Whose house do you live in? Whose food do you eat?...”

Fuck, fuck, fuck. 

Taehyung became alarmed, silently drawing his index finger and thumb over his lips in frustration. You didn’t need to hear this, it was complete bullshit. Your situation with him was different, it was forced and coerced. Taehyung could tell you were someone who truly didn't favour using someone else’s money, and knew you were trying your damn hardest to adjust to the idea itself having to spend your life with him. 

He rushed out into the hallway where he began pacing, trying his hardest to contain himself and hope that you wouldn’t take your mother’s words to heart. Was this why you were so adamant about the fucking card? Because you had to hear shit like this from your mother? 

This was only going to undo the work he’d successfully laid out, thinking it would erase any convincing he had done about his money and what’s his is yours. This was bad news, he didn’t want you thinking any of your mother’s words were true. 

They simply weren’t. 

“Leave my house, this instance.”

“What did you say to me?”

“I said get out! I don’t ever want to see you again!”

Taehyung was becoming anxious, the argument was clearly escalating and he felt uneasy, an incessant feeling bothering his chest. 

There it was again, that same sense of protection he felt when he saw you practically shaking talking to that Kisoo guy. He didn't understand why it manifested, or why he felt it so emphatically. All he knew was after hearing the way your voice nearly cracked, unstable and troubled as you grew more emotional, he felt the strong feeling to oddly.. rescue you? 

It’s like he wanted to bolt down the stairs, physically stand in between the argument and force your mother out of the house, all while trying to persuade you what she said wasn't true. 

Why did he feel this way? This was none of his damn business, had absolutely nothing to do with him yet if it weren't for half the mind he had, he could’ve found himself racing down the stairs to defend you.

Taehyung shivered at the thought, shaking it off.

“... you will end up living the same life as me, using your husband for his money!”

“I’ll never be like you, I’ll never be a cheap woman who only stays with a man for his money. A woman who probably cheats...”

And not long after he heard the slap, evidently hard and painful in just it’s sound. Taehyung immediately froze in his tracks, halting his pacing as worry blossomed in his chest. He prodded over to hide against the edge of the wall that connected to his staircase, able to peak at the sight of both you and your mother stood before the front foyer. 

Taehyung felt pissed within seconds, again unable to decipher why he felt the need to protect you. Though what he did know was that he felt bothered, never wanted anyone to hurt you and he hated the very thought of it. 

Maybe it was because of his considerate personality again, or maybe it really was because of you. 

What made Taehyung grow even angrier, though, was the way you reacted, listening to you dub this as something that happened often, and he was uber pissed now. 

You didn’t fucking deserve that at all. 

It took him no time to understand your apprehension and natural disliking for your mother, wanting himself to never have to converse with her. He would most likely be rude and curt, replaying the same vile words she really had the nerve to say to her own daughter. Scratch that, his wife. 

Yeah, Taehyung thought. My wife shouldn’t be treated like this. 

He knew it was wrong, impolite of him to assume and judge a person so openly based on their cover, though Taehyung could tell these were your mother’s true colours, and any other persona she assumed would only be a farce. 

Taehyung watched as you simply shoved your mother out of the house, shutting the door only to lean against it and allow the tears you’d hidden to fall down your cheeks. Taehyung turned his back and leaned against the wall, concealing himself to give you privacy. 

He knew it was already rude to have eavesdropped, even ruder to look on at such a vulnerable moment. It was rude because he wouldn’t even be able to comfort you, only watch as a dumb-founded bystander; rendered useless because it wasn’t his place to console you.

He knew nothing about you.

He really didn’t know your situation, the relationship you had with your mother. He couldn’t step on your toes and give you advice as if he knew you, nor supply you with words that would make you feel better; contemplating he’d possibly never be able to. 

He wasn’t your remedy, he wasn’t your muse, just a man you were forced to marry and now have to live with. A man who stripped you of your independence, ruined your life all just by his mere existence.

 And so Taehyung found even more reasons to not rush to you, simply leave you on your own knowing he was partly the reason for your pain, your suffering. That your mother only said such things because of him, that she only insulted you because of him. 

So he found himself retreating, walking carefully back to his study to mind his own business and continue his work, complete it as though nothing happened. 

But as each step seemed to grow longer, heavier, he found himself unable to retreat. Unable to function knowing you were probably hurting, unable to ignore you and so blatantly turn his back on you. 

So in a hasty, irrational decision, Taehyung found himself turning on his heel and rushing towards the staircase. 

You continued to sob quietly, thinking if you just let it all out now, cried just about hard enough all the sorrow would leave your body. So that’s what you did, bit your lips to contain the aching feeling in your chest as your throat seemed to constrict, swallowing all your feelings down in an attempt to poorly control them. 

You were in your own world, the sink’s water masking any noise behind you, and so when somebody’s hand reached out to rest against your shoulder, you were completely startled. You jumped, quickly shutting the water in a flash and refusing to look back at the culprit to save your pride. 

Whoever it was, they couldn’t see you like this. 

Though when you heard his dulcet, deep voice calling your name, you knew exactly who it was.

“Y/N?”

You straightened yourself up, breathing out the emotions ravaging your chest and stabilizing your voice to address him. “Hey, Taehyung. What um.. what are you doing here?” 

Taehyung could hear your solemn attempt to cover everything up, feeling your sense of embarrassment practically fill the air. 

“Nothing, just.. wanted to see you.” Taehyung said, unsure of how to approach this.

“You’re probably busy. You should go back to work.” You tried hard to sound okay while you practically swallowed back tears, clutching the counter of the sink.

“It’s alright, not important.” Taehyung waved it off, letting his hard remain on your shoulder seeing you didn’t reject him. A beat of silence lingered until he spoke again.

“Can you look at me, Y/N?” There was no pressure in his voice, just the same soft consideration you’d heard at the hotel suite a couple nights ago.

And you hated it, hated that it made you want to give in, want to so easily follow his request and bare to him whatever he wanted.

Until your last braincell kicked in. 

“I’m sorry, Taehyung. I’m really sorry if I interrupted your work. Please go back to your study.” You voiced just barely above a shaky tone, trying your absolute hardest to sound just fine, seem okay. But the more Taehyung spoke, the more you felt your defense mechanisms slowly coming undone.

And you knew he knew.

“I wasn't interrupted.” He stated normally, his voice natural and yet he sounded so.. comforting? He was simply responding to you and yet his voice and presence seemed to soothe the sharp ache in your chest. 

It was fucking poetic. 

“I’m sure I did, Taehyung. Just please, return to your work.” 

“I don’t need to, Y/N, I can stay here.” He was firm as he stood behind you, measly hand against your shoulder and his usually intimidating, towering figure reassuring.

It was odd.

“You shouldn’t. Just go back, Taehyung.” You attempted to voice with more strength, trying to blink tears away and it didn’t convince Taehyung in the slightest.

“I don’t want to. Look at me first.” His voice sounded calm, and it was really like honey. Thick yet sweet, so deep and yet it’s cadence harboured the ability to put anyone at ease.

You shut your eyes tightly, wiping at them hastily to rid any tears as you sniffled and turned around. You were met by his face that slightly softened at the sight of you, eyes seeming to melt as they swirled with consideration, different from his usually unreadable expression. 

“See, I’m fine. You can go back to work.” You plastered a smile on, trying to stand a little more confidently, though Taehyung didn’t budge. 

He only remained, gazing at the features of your face as he seemed to drape his own with a small sense of sadness, like he was upset, maybe even hurt? It was slight, though identifiable. It left you quite speechless, thinking it was all just part of your imagination.

It couldn’t be real.  

But it exactly was as Taehyung’s large hand came up to gently touch the cheek your mother slapped. You didn’t realize it hurt more than it should’ve when you felt a sharp sting at his touch, wincing.

You registered there was probably a visible mark and grew too vulnerable, downright embarrassed for your liking and so you deflected him, smacking his hand away from your face as you looked off to the side. 

“I’m fine, Taehyung.” You declared, and Taehyung didn’t know how to react as his hand came off you, feeling a bit disheartened. He simply wanted to help, and he didn’t want to leave without doing so.

So he still looked at you, eyes possibly growing sympathetic though it could’ve been a figment of your imagination again.

“You didn’t deserve that.” He voiced soft in sound, though resolute in nature.

Taehyung was having trouble choosing what he could say without overstepping, invading a part of you he probably shouldn’t. 

“I didn’t ask for a pity party, Taehyung. Go back to work.” You said with a more snippy tone than you planned, though found it befitting of your current emotions nonetheless. 

“I’m not pitying. I’m..” Taehyung struggled for a word until you answered. 

“What, caring?” You scoffed, “Please, Taehyung, you don’t have to care like my real husband, it’s only on paper-”

“But I am your real husband.” Taehyung emphasized, his serious eyes meeting yours. “It’s on paper and in real life, so I think I’m allowed to care.” Taehyung retorted with narrowed eyes finding he liked that sentence, liked what it had to convey because it was damn true. 

Taehyung decided on reaching for your arms to drive his point home, though watched as you again, naturally retracted from him. You still seemed to refuse him, didn’t see him in a good enough light to not cower away. 

And he still fucking hated it. 

Taehyung went for it anyway and gripped your arms when you began to draw away, catching you. The action nearly demanded you look into his eyes, and found yourself doing exactly so. 

“Y/N, first, don’t be scared of me, please?” His eyes grew soft. “I seriously-I really hate it. I would never..” Taehyung trailed as his vision fell to the side of your face, eyes seeming to reflect concern.

You were completely surprised, watching him unmask a plethora of emotion you didn't think he’d so candidly reveal.

Taehyung brought his hand to brush your slightly swollen cheek, continuing. “I would never do this, do anything to scare you. I just wouldn’t.” Taehyung was emphatic and genuine, gently touching the fresh wound on the apple of your cheek.

“I.. know that, Taehyung.” You again felt that same urge to touch his hand that touched you, but you decided against it. “Though I don’t need your pity. This doesn’t hurt, don’t break a sweat about it, please.” You were trying to turn away from his hold but Taehyung didn’t let go, maintaining you in his hands.

“It’s not pity, Y/N. It’s sympathy. This bothers me, okay?”

“I don’t need it. I’ve got myself-” 

“But you’re not alone.” Taehyung suddenly stated seriously, tone permeating the air and you just about froze. You only looked at him with furrowed eyebrows, trying to decipher what he was trying to say.

“You’re not.. alone, okay? You have me.” He spoke as though he was trying to convey a meaningful message, trying to mark his own words. “In whatever way... you have me.” It was a hesitant claim, but it felt just like when he’d made his promise to you at the altar. 

And suddenly you found yourself giving in, sighing as you registered this was all pretty much an elaborate reflection of the lesson you learned not so long ago.  You and Taehyung are married now, and no matter how that status manifested itself, you had to accept what came with it.

Especially if it meant him.

“Okay.” You replied simply, multiple emotions masked by the plain word. 

Taehyung looked at you a little surprised you’d actually accepted that, but broke into a genuine grin you hadn’t really seen before. 

And you really did like the way he smiled.

He made you want to smile too, though as your facial muscles worked for the grin your cheek stung, wincing as a result. Taehyung exclaimed within a matter of seconds. “Ah, don’t move.” He cautioned, smiling a little when you chuckled at his overreaction. “Don’t worry, Taehyung. It’s alright.” 

“Alright, my foot.” Taehyung joked, bending down to inspect your wound closer than you expected, and you hid the feeling that shot through you because of his proximity with a nervous laugh, causing you to wince again. 

“Hey, what did I say?” Taehyung chastised you lightly, lips in a straight line as he shook his head disapprovingly. “C’mon, let’s treat this.” 

You immediately whined, feeling too lazy to get something so small and insignificant treated. “Taehyung, it’s not even that bad, why?” You pouted. 

“Cause it’ll leave a mark on your pretty face.” Taehyung smiled innocently, not even caring about the effect it left on you as he found your hand and tugged you along to the second floor. Your eyes only remained widened, never letting up the surprise that took you. 

Did he just call you pretty? 

You let Taehyung lead you to your master bathroom, where he situated you by the counter and shuffled around for his first-aid kit. He finally retrieved the box, dabbing some alcohol onto a cotton swab and bringing it to your face. 

Taehyung just about performed the action until he began struggling bending to your height, wanting to carefully apply the alcohol. So he tried different angles and maneuvered himself around, all coming up useless. “God, why do you have to be so small?” Taehyung huffed under his breath as he stood to his full height, contemplating how he’d accomplish this. 

“I’m not small, you’re just really-” You were about to complete your sentence until Taehyung’s hands suddenly grabbed your waist, lifting you in a single breath and propping you up onto the bathroom counter. You would’ve exclaimed, maybe protest though believed it would’ve made the heat in your face so much more apparent.

“That’s better.” He grinned, biting back a chuckle at your flushed face and widened eyes.  

Those fucking eyes. 

Taehyung then found it easier to apply what he needed, cleaning up the wound precariously before dabbing on some ointment to avoid any scarring, only missing a bandage to place on your cheek. Taehyung searched for one in his kit and drawers, though came up empty-handed. He became puzzled as to where he put his bandages, placing his hands in his pockets to think until he felt the familiar scratch of a wrapper.

He furrowed his eyebrows at first until he figured exactly what it was. 

And he suppressed a stupid grin. 

Taehyung pulled out the wrapper and watched as you avoided eye contact with him, cheeks still clearly warm as you swung your legs on the counter in anticipation of him.

Cute, he thought.

He ripped the wrapper, chucking the garbage aside as he drew close to your face. His breath suddenly fanned you, mere inches from your face with his lips so proximal you were stupidly remembering your kiss from a couple days ago.

He was just so close. So close that you could actually discern he had this pretty little mole on his cheek, even one just underneath his eye, lining his lash line. You smiled realizing he had such unique details, even seeing he had a mono-lid and a double eyelid. Then came his obvious features, his plushy, pink lips, his chocolate eyes, his soft hair and sculpted face structure. It made you want to hide your own face out of near insecurity.

He was just so beautiful.

You watched him as he focused on you, trying to calm down your oddly racing heart, feeling the sensation of his closeness shoot through your body. He smoothed the bandage over your cheek and drew away far too earlier than you wanted.

“There. Apply something before putting a bandage on, right?” He cocked an eyebrow and looked at you knowingly, crossing his arms. 

You immediately smiled at the sentiment, realizing it’s the same line you said to him during your first exchange, and you felt your heart just slightly, slightly flutter at the thought he remembered.

“Right.”

It had been a week since that incident.

Taehyung and yourself had assumed your regular lives, having to drudge back to work after a few days off.

Your mother’s words still lingered around in your head, spoiling your mood here and there though assuming the ever-so healthy manner of simply pushing the mentally detrimental thoughts away, distracting yourself with work. 

You wish you could detail anymore interactions with Taehyung, though they were scarce with how rarely you saw each other. You both either just missed each other, were too busy to pay attention or simply came home too late. Even sleeping together was hit or miss, usually either of you crawling into bed earlier than the other with no real exchanges.

You could say it made you feel just a little sad, though not entirely considering you two were genuinely busy people, Taehyung an even busier person.

That all came to a full stop though one Friday morning, you were seated by the island and staring at your most recent design for a building, iPad pen twirling in hand. You were sipping on coffee when Taehyung pulled out a chair and suddenly startled you, coffee almost spilling.

“Jheez,” you huffed, “you scared me.” 

“Sorry, you were just really focused.” Taehyung apologized as he placed his own iPad down, reading away.

It’d been like this the whole week, you either designing and leading projects at your own job with Taehyung the ever-busy CEO at his own company, causing you both to often sit in each other’s presence though never take your eyes off your screens.

“Hey, I wanted to tell you something.” Taehyung suddenly perked up, stopping his scrolling. 

“Hm?” You looked up. 

“I should’ve told you this sooner, but we have to attend a gala tonight.” Taehyung grimaced at how sudden this seemed, arms crossed as he leaned on the counter.

Did the action really have to make his biceps pop?

Anyway, you were nearly spitting out your drink for the umpteenth time because of Taehyung, eyes blown out at his abrupt news. 

“Wh-what did you just say? Tonight?”

“Yeah, one of friends’ companies. 25th anniversary since establishment.” Taehyung went to bite a piece of his toast with strawberry jam.

You noticed he liked strawberries and didn’t like bread crust, making you want to smile sometimes at the child-like charm he hid underneath his intimidating persona. “They’re holding a huge gala and he’s one of my best friends, we’ll have to attend.”

You eventually came to understanding him, trying to wrap your head around having to suddenly attend such a high-end event. 

“This event is also going to be our first public appearance together. It’s important.” Taehyung stressed, back to scrolling through his iPad. 

“That’s alright. I don’t mind going, it’s just...I don’t think I even have a dress for a gala.” You mentally sifted through your own wardrobe, coming up short once you realized you haven’t been to an extravagant event like that since you were a teenager.

“I know, I bought one for you.”

You should really stop drinking beverages around Taehyung because you can never seem to keep them in your damn mouth. “You bought one? Taehyung..” You whined. “What did I say about giving me things?” 

“Hey, what did I say about giving you things?” He scolded you lightly. “I give you things simply because I want to.”  

You pouted. “Still, you don’t even know my size, when did you even have time?”

“That doesn’t matter. It’ll fit you, don’t worry.” Taehyung sent a smile as he deflected your question and returned to his iPad, not wanting to reveal that he’d secretly referred to your other dresses in your shared closet for your correct measurements.

“But it probably wasted your time. I should’ve gone out and bought it myself.” You felt guilty, realizing it probably made him compromise his work.

“It wasn’t a waste of time.” Taehyung countered, not really liking how you considered yourself not worthy of spending time on.

“I- thank you.” You blurted out before his statement could effect you. “When does the event begin?”

“7. You should try getting off work early to get ready.” Taehyung suggested, sipping his tea as he looked at you.

“Oh God, I’m gonna have to doll myself up. I haven’t done that in ages.” You held a hand to your mouth, trying to digest the fact you’d probably have to look like a trophy wife. 

“I could get you a makeup artist and hair stylist.” Taehyung offered. 

“No, it’s okay. I think I’ll be fine. I just haven’t been to a gala in a long time.” You felt surprised about the fact yourself. “I’m gonna have to meet so many people.” 

“You will, but I’ll be there.” Taehyung assured, glancing up at you.

“Of course, but you won’t be with me the entire night. I’ll have to brush up on my rich people skills.” You blew a raspberry, knowing you had great interpersonal skills but just didn’t like acting so fake all the time. 

“I won’t leave, just stick with me the whole night.” Taehyung stated as he absentmindedly held his index finger to his lips reading an email, quite goddamn illegally if you had to say so yourself. 

“I will.” You confirmed, erasing at a line on your iPad. “Will you come home early too?”

Taehyung clicked his tongue disappointingly. “I will but just barely on time. Friday’s mean meetings for me, so I can’t leave early. I’ll get ready at work, come back inside the house to get you.”

“Okay.” You’re not sure why you felt suddenly sad he wouldn’t be home earlier. Maybe it was just the usual feeling of not wanting to be alone, because God forbid you actually started getting used to Taehyung’s presence. 

Taehyung rose from his seat and cast his iPad to the side, sliding on his suit jacket as he glanced at his watch, checking the time. You noticed yourself and flashed your vision to your iPad, gawking at the time and realizing you could be late. 

“Oh shit, I have to go.” 

“Me too, I’ll see you tonight, okay?” Taehyung confirmed as he made his way to the front door, fixing his sleeve. You propped off your own seat and began walking towards the stairs, just about ascending until Taehyung suddenly called your name. 

“Y/N!” He peeked out from the front door, seconds from leaving. 

“Yes?” 

“I hope you like the colour, it’s one of my favourites.” Taehyung smiled sweetly, sending his last farewell before he dashed out of the house. 

Your eyebrows shot up and practically gawked, immediately running up the stairs thinking of where to find this dress. He had to have hidden it from you considering he’s been doing so ever since he mysteriously bought it. 

You instinctively rushed into your shared bedroom to grab a scrunchy for the day, all distracted until you caught sight of a white box adorned with a black bow sitting atop your bed. 

Your eyes went wide just reading the infamous label. 

Chanel. 

You had to physically keep from flooring yourself, in disbelief he’d purchased you a Chanel dress. You were even more fearful to uncover it, the information of him buying it himself raking your brain. 

It was even his favourite colour, nearly swooning at the fact he chose for you to wear his favourite colour. So you made your way over to the box hesitantly, untying the ribbon and casting the lid aside cautiously, only to audibly gasp. 

Your eyes fell to a ruby red dress with a delicate V neckline, completely blown away he chose such a bold colour for you to wear. 

You carefully grabbed the dress to take it out of its box, revealing more to discover it was a floor-length gown. It produced a small train though lifted in the front to reveal the shoes you’d wear, the skirt of plain, thick fabric until you saw the torso area; light beading expanding from the stomach area eventually leading into the skirt. 

Shock wasn’t even the correct word to use, you were stunned, completely taken by his choice. The dress was simply gorgeous, beautiful in its own right and you were almost too afraid to wear it. 

Nonetheless, this event was important to Taehyung, so you took a deep breath, tucked the dress back into its box and mentally prepared yourself for the day ahead. 

It was bordering 6:30 now. 

You’d successfully left work early, around the 2 o’clock mark to come home and indulge in a 4 hour self-care routine. It’d seriously been too long since you last attended an event similar to this, grand in size and visited by at least a hundred people. 

It reminded you of your engagement party, though not entirely since there would paparazzi and would be your first real appearance with Taehyung ever since your wedding. 

And quite frankly, you really wanted look better than you did then. You labelled it pretty much a disaster since you were a catatonic mess regretting all her life choices, probably looking unappealing in all your photos. 

Along with knowing the impact Taehyung has, not only in the business world but in general also left you wanting to up your game. You were his wife now, and that came with a high amount of scrutiny and criticism having nabbed one of the most eligible bachelor’s in Korea.

You’d already given up ever checking any articles and avoided social media, knowing that there would be inevitably nasty and judgmental comments. This night was important though, where you’d flank him as the women he’s so-called ‘in love with’ or the ‘love of his life’. 

It also dawned on you Taehyung in fact had a high-valued reputation to uphold, and so did you as his wife. 

So as you stood before the mirror in the walk-in closet, inspecting your dress, you contemplated how you’d survive this night, how you would act as the perfect, most suitable wife to Taehyung. 

You really wanted to hide your face out of how dolled up you looked; your makeup was on the elegant side, not heavy but brushed up to look soft, completed with red lipstick that matched your dress and hair set around your face in loose waves. 

The dress looked almost embarrassingly good on you, Taehyung somehow having chosen the right sized dress as it hugged your every curve right, accentuating the right parts of your body and even the V neckline not dipping too low, but showing quite the generous amount of skin. 

You couldn’t stop blushing at all. 

Taehyung had finally arrived at the house, rushing inside quickly registering he was cutting the time close. “Y/N! I’m home!” he called for you, quickly checking his appearance in a mirror as he smoothed pieces of his parted hair, curling just before his eyes and revealing some forehead.

“I’m in our room!” 

He approved his own look in the mirror and jogged up the stairs, mentally preparing himself before he’d have to see you in the dress he chose, almost excited about it. 

He’d simply loved it at first sight, and couldn’t stop pondering what the striking colour would look like on you. So as Taehyung entered your bedroom, he became confused finding it empty. He then ventured further inside, catching sight of the ajar closet door and light beaming through. 

He sauntered over carefully, peeking inside and Taehyung��s jaw nearly dropped to the floor, almost stupidly. 

His eyes fell to you standing in front of the mirror, fidgeting as you looked at yourself in the dress with the back of it undone. 

And Taehyung had never seen anything more pretty in his life. 

He was speechless for the umpteenth time because of you, not even knowing how to begin a sentence because he might sound like a second grader if he did. So all Taehyung could muster up the literacy to say was “Wow.” 

You turned around instantly, eyes looking as though you were a deer caught in headlights. Taehyung’s eyes widened even more peering at the elegant front, jaw almost slack as he scanned over your body.

“T-Taehyung.” You couldn’t think of anything else to say. 

Taehyung still seemed to be struggling a little, eyes glued to you until he cleared his throat and looked away. “Um, yeah?” 

“S-sorry, but.. could you actually..?” And you did it again, angling your back towards Taehyung to call to the zipper of your dress. You really couldn’t try zipping it yourself, which left it sitting comfortably just at your lower back, your skin exposed to Taehyung. 

You could visibly see Taehyung flash his eyes to your skin until he looked elsewhere, nodding as he licked his lips. “Sure.” 

You watched him near you, his face blank as he took a handful of your hair and softly placed in front of you. He then brought his hand against your side to hold you in place, his other working for the zipper. It was another case of his rather hot breath fanning your back, almost teasingly zipping up your dress by simple inches. 

He was close again, closer than he’s been in a week and you sincerely hated it always affected you in some way. It made your chest flutter, suck in a breath you didn’t even need to hold in. You relaxed when Taehyung finally finished, his hands gripping your arms from behind as he looked at you through the mirror.

And for some odd reason, he liked how your heights contrasted each other. 

He had the slightest hint of a smile, eyes seeming to gleam with something you couldn’t quite decipher. 

“You look pretty.” He said, gazing at you through the reflection and you had to physically stop from beaming like an idiot. Your chest fills with butterflies, face collecting with heat at his compliment. 

How could an Adonis like him call you pretty?

You bit your lip, gazing up at his taller, impeccably dressed reflection as you admired him, his every feature crafted to a degree of perfection that left you in awe. 

“You look really handsome.” You complimented, watching his lips just about curve into a smile that met his eyes, and you wish he didn’t have to look so handsome when he smiled too. 

“Thank you.” He voiced before turning you around by your arms to face him. “Make sure you wear a coat tonight, it’s cold.” He informed, you nodding until your quick eyes spotted his tie loosened by just a centimeter, throwing you off. 

“Oh, your tie.” You exclaimed quietly, reaching for it without a thought and pushing it upwards, angling it to perfection. Taehyung suddenly froze, unexpecting of you doing such a thing and so proximal his nose flooded with your perfume, liking the scent. 

Peonies. 

He tensed with an unknown feeling until your gazes locked on each other, simply looking to look while your hands remained on his tie. He realized more than a second passed and Taehyung scrambled for something to say, sputtering.

“I’ll uh.. I’ll be waiting out front.” He assured as he stepped away, exiting the room quickly and leaving you to your lonesome. 

This was gonna be one hell of a night, you thought.

“Remember, there’s going to be a lot of cameras and people here. We’ll really need to act like a couple.” Taehyung sat beside you in the back of an Escalade, manspreading in all his glory and you were sincerely glad he couldn’t read your mind.

“Got it, let’s give em’ a show.” You cheered with your little fists, determined as the car arrived at the lavish venue. 

“Yeah, let’s do it.” Taehyung mimicked your action. “Don’t worry about getting nervous, I’m there.” He assured for good measure, gauging your affirmation.  

You nodded as you took a deep breath, smoothing over your dress and fixing your hair. Taehyung unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned into you, speaking near your ear. “I’ll get out first and open the door for you, wait here.” You tensed at the action before nodding again, Taehyung making his way out the car. 

He then opened your door as promised within seconds, greeting you with a warm smile as he held out his hand for you. You grinned back at him affectionately as you took it, adjusting your dress to step onto the concrete. 

You were met by dozens of camera flashes and a yelling crowd, shouting various things you couldn’t quite make out. You were almost distracted by it and felt a small sense of anxiety creep up you, until Taehyung pulled you flush against his side, hand curving around your waist.

You smiled up at him in accordance, and he beamed back as he walked you two down the carpet leading into the venue, casually ignoring all the noise and people. 

Taehyung guided you inside safely to where you were welcomed by a beautiful looking hall, pristine and extremely elegant. It was surely fitting for a grand gala. Your eyes caught a small crowd of photographers in the foyer snapping photos at a certain wall with a backdrop, curiosity dawning on you as Taehyung led you towards the coat check. 

“What’s happening there?” You pointed towards the scene. 

“Oh, exclusive press.” He snuck a look, stripping off his coat. “They’re the ones I was talking about, they’re gonna take pictures of us.” Taehyung answered distracted as he retrieved your coat and gave both to the coat checker, smiling a thank you. 

You didn’t even have time to really respond as Taehyung dragged you to the very scene, the pair of you next to have photos taken. You tried to process the whole thing as he walked you over, mentally preparing to look your best until Taehyung suddenly whispered lowly in your ear again. 

And again, it sent shivers down your spine. 

“Just smile and hold me, okay?” Your chest fluttered for an odd reason, nodding back to him as he brought you in front of the line of photographers. 

You stayed true to your promise and tucked an arm around his torso as the other draped his chest, closest to him as you could. Taehyung almost settled next to you until he felt something at his feet, noticing he was nearly stepping on your gown. 

He broke away from you, unexpectedly bending down to catch the skirt of your dress and delicately fix it behind you. You heard the hushed exclamations of the photographers, most of them doting on his considerate act as you just about protested, though suddenly remembered Taehyung’s words from today. 

It was probably better to stay silent. 

So you simply smiled as you watched Taehyung adjust your dress, feeling a warm sensation spread across your chest when he returned even though it most likely was for show, his hands coming back on you. 

This time you didn’t try to suppress anything, allowing some of your feelings to manifest into a real smile, remembering you were to appear as a couple anyway. 

And whether or not there was some truth to your expressions, was anyone really keeping track?

You two began posing for the photographers, smiling in all directions and clutching onto each other closely. You occasionally tried different angles to look better, everything going smoothly until you heard someone shout out, eyes widening as a result.

“Kiss her!” 

It wasn’t long before the other photographers began agreeing, encouraging Taehyung to kiss you and you had no clue how he would react. You were slightly biting your lip as you were occupied avoiding eye contact, that was until Taehyung quietly called you.

“Y/N, look at me.” 

“Hm?” You instinctively responded and looked up at him, completely taken by surprise when Taehyung suddenly planted a soft kiss to your forehead. Your eyes visibly went wider, only his chest to stare at until he eventually disconnected.

He returned his eyes to you and grinned at your wide-eyed reaction, suddenly reminding you. “Smile,” he encouraged with the flash of his own boxy grin, wanting to see you smile. 

And it damn well worked. 

Taehyung was right about the size of this gala. 

Huge. 

It was grand, the entire hall seeming to be spat right out of a castle with about a hundred fancy-looking people inside. You thought it would’ve been uninteresting and difficult to communicate with others tonight and put on your best fake smile, though the night’s atmosphere amassed with champagne, good food and great conversationalists left you in a better mood than you expected. 

It was actually quite fun, finding yourself genuinely conversing with the people Taehyung dragged you to meet, keeping to your promise of staying right by his side the whole night, and he kept his, never having left you. 

You’d met various people, having gotten familiar to Taehyung’s high-status world of business and relations. Long story short, Taehyung knew a lot of people, and you were surprised at how extroverted he suddenly seemed.  

He was practically a social butterfly, not having forgotten a single name of who he spoke to along with somehow remembering personal details about their lives. It left you impressed, joining along with his light-hearted conversation with your own extrovert tendencies. 

Everyone you’d met had been nice so far, but by far the most amusing people you’d met had to have been Taehyung’s 5 best friends, the same ones you’d seen in his photographs. 

“Y/N, this is Kim Namjoon and Seokjin, they’re brothers.” 

Both tall and quite frankly broad men greeted you warmly, one of them having a nice dimply smile while the other was far too handsome to be looked at for free. 

“Nice to meet you, Y/N.” They said after another, reaching out to shake your hand. “We’re co-CEOs of one of Korea’s largest private airline.” Namjoon of the two informed.   

“Likewise. And wow, that’s impressive.” You complimented. “Might I also say, you’re both.. tall.” You had to almost crane your neck to meet their eyes, thankful for the heels you were wearing as the group laughed at your remark. 

“Perhaps, though you’re quite short yourself, Y/N.” Seokijn commented light-heartedly, causing you to playfully pout and retort him. “Oh c’mon, I hear that from Taehyung already, not you too.” You giggled, absentmindedly leaning into Taehyung as he tensed, your body pressing into his. 

“It’s cause Taehyung likes short girls, teasing means he likes you.”  A built looking man with longer hair suddenly joked, nudging Taehyung with his elbow.

“Shut up, Jungkook. I was gonna give you a proper introduction, not anymore.” Taehyung scolded, though Jungkook persisted. 

“Well, you just said my name, that’s already half the intro.” Jungkook then gently took your hand, placing a chaste kiss against the back of it you didn’t expect at all. 

“Nice to meet you, Y/N. Jeon Jungkook, CEO of Korea’s largest game development company.” Jungkook sent you a kind smile and it was hard to not compare him to a bunny, his teeth reminding you of one. 

“Yah, don’t do that” Taehyung swatted Jungkook’s hand away, protesting disapprovingly. 

“Woah, did Taehyung just get jealous?” Namjoon inquired shocked.

“Somebody get their phone out, we’ll need evidence I didn’t hit him first.” Jungkook held up his hands in mock surrender. 

“Jungkook, the only thing we’re finding in our phones is videos of you nibbling on carrots.” Taehyung quipped and it made the group chortle, yourself speaking up at the mention of a rabbit. 

“Actually, I was thinking you resemble a bunny.” You simply wanted to voice an observation, though it sent the whole group into a frenzy. 

“See Jungkook! Other people notice it too!” A man you hadn’t been introduced to yet suddenly burst out, though you could automatically tell he gave off this radiant energy that was infectious. 

He almost felt like the sun. 

“Whatever, Hoseok, you’re like a squirrel.” Jungkook countered and you digested the man’s name for information. 

“And you’re a rabbit, you better buy me what we wagered.” Hoseok scolded from what you could assume, was the younger of the two. 

“Wagered? I don’t remember anything about that.” Jungkook feigned innocence as he looked off to the side.

“Jungkook, we were all there that day, you owe Hoseok a vending machine.” Namjoon spoke up, laughing through the remark. 

“Guys. Y/N is literally right here, we didn’t even introduce ourselves properly.” A man with a fairly sweet voice interjected. He had such soft visuals, almost similar to an angel if you wanted to be honest. 

He then looked to you with a sweet smile, extending his hand. “Nice to meet you, Y/N. Park Jimin, CEO of Park Hotels & Resorts”

“This is his event.” Taehyung informed.

“Ohh, nice to meet you!” You perked up, his aura making you feel all comfortable and giggly, there was just something about his bubbly energy. 

The man named Hoseok then extended his hand, “Nice to meet you, Y/N. Jung Hoseok. Sorry for the late introduction, but I basically own a bunch of famous clubs across Korea.” He laughed all dimply and warm, and he really did remind you of the sun. 

“Oh wow, hopefully we’ll get to visit sometime! Clubs are so fun.” You lit up, all excited about a good club scene until Taehyung ruined your fun. 

“Nuh uh, not after your little drunk scene at our engagement party.” Taehyung looked down at you and chastised. 

“Taehyung, it wasn’t even that much. Don’t be dramatic.” You scolded him back. 

“Alright Miss I’m-Not-A-Lightweight, I almost had to carry you.” 

“I was walking just fine last time I remembered.” You crossed your arms and feigned innocence, Taehyung growing scandalized. 

“Oh really, now?” He cocked an eyebrow, just about to continue until Namjoon interjected. “Looks like married life’s been treating you guys well.” 

“Of course, they look practically in love.” Hoseok beamed sarcastically, gesturing towards you both.

“C’mon, Taehyung, tell us what you love about her. Let’s see the simping.” Jungkook playfully taunted Taehyung, egging him on.  

“Shut up. You all already know our marriage isn’t real.” Taehyung rebutted the younger man, eyes narrowed. 

You were taken aback, eyes flashing to Taehyung. “They know?” 

“Of course they do, your best friend knows too, doesn’t she?” Taehyung was referring to Hana, and you acquiesced realizing he had a point. 

“You know, you guys say it’s a fake marriage but you look pretty close to me.” Jimin pointed towards Taehyung’s arm still hugging around your waist, causing you both to realize and promptly disconnect. 

“No, we aren’t.” You and Taehyung retorted at the same time, vision snapping to each other with shocked eyes. 

“Oh c’mon, Tae, you’re really gonna say about your wife?” Seokjin teased him, playful lilt to his tone. 

“Yeah, Taehyung, just look at her, how aren’t you whipped already?” Jungkook remarked as he gestured towards you, feeling shy as your feet shuffled. 

“I’m not answering that.” Taehyung bit back with an irritated tone, folding his arms as he broke eye contact with the group. 

You decided to lighten the mood. “Guys, please, the only thing Taehyung’s whipped for is his company.” You joked, and despite the small sense of hurt saying that sentence, you felt joy making the men suddenly laugh so loudly. 

Taehyung’s shy and embarrassed expression was even more priceless. 

“Oh my God, Y/N, you’re seriously the perfect match for him.” Hoseok added on as he laughed and you couldn’t help but bite back a smile, not knowing what he meant by that though taking it as a compliment.

“Alright guys, remember we had a mission: operation make-Taehyung-and-Y/N’s-marriage-seem-real-as-fuck.” Jungkook suddenly put on the theatrics and halted the group, changing the conversation. 

“Oh yeah, we had a whole plan, didn’t we?” Jimin remembered. 

“Yup. Gotta prepare them for nosey press and annoying relatives. We should start with questions they’d get asked. Make it like a fake interview or something.” Namjoon suggested, leading along the others as he pretended to hold a microphone. 

“You’re all some of the richest men in Seoul yet you’re acting like children. I don’t know you people.” Taehyung tried waving the men off while you couldn’t help but laugh, finding them the most fun people you’ve encountered. 

Childish or not, they were completely unexpected of what you thought a group of CEOs. They didn’t live up to the cliché uptight and uber sophisticated stereotype, rather open and acted however they chose. 

It was refreshing. 

“It’s cause we’re friends with you, Taehyung.” Hoseok shot back and it made everyone snicker. 

“I got it. Let’s ask them to spill some details about each other only they’d know. Someone’s bound to ask that.” Seokjin reasoned, gauging agreeance from the others. 

“Oh my God, you guys already know our marriage is fake. Why would you make this up?” You asked through a giggle, still finding the situation comical. 

“Sorry Mrs. Kim, but that’s precisely why, and I’m afraid we don’t know what you mean by ‘fake’. Now tell the good press something about Mr. Kim we don’t know.” Jungkook began the skit as he held his fake microphone towards you, the others joining in as though imitating paparazzi. 

“Alright, this is gonna be exclusive, pens ready?” You decided to join them, and they all nodded in confirmation as Taehyung flashed his eyes to you, unprepared for you to play along. 

“Mr. Kim is quite something.” You addressed him formally for effect. “He acts all mysterious and cool, but he’s actually just a cuddler who likes tea and cuts the crusts off his bread.” You relayed with a wide grin, all of them suddenly exclaiming and reacting like a high schooler has just confessed the name of their crush. 

“Oh my God, Tae, seriously? Bread crusts? What are you, like, 3?” Seokjin teased. 

“Hyung, your ears literally turn red when people give you attention. Are you 3?” Taehyung retorted and it only elicited more noise from the group, Seokjin exclaiming defensively and Taehyung bringing a hand up to his forehead, sighing. 

“Guys! Okay, let’s get some real answers here. We gotta know what Y/N would say if someone asked her.. maybe some things she likes about Taehyung. Let’s hear it.” Jimin got everyone back on track, attention on you. 

You smiled nervously and flashed a look towards Taehyung, who still had this arms folded and vision looking off to the side, ignoring the entire situation before him. 

You could tell he was pissed with the way his jaw locked, though the fact that he wasn’t paying attention made you a little more confident. 

Taehyung wasn’t exactly pissed, though if he could bonk all his friends on the head a few times he would. He knew teasing and jokes were all common within the group, he just didn’t expect to be the sole target tonight, and so he decided to smoothly neglect the conversation altogether. 

He was succeeding, not expecting you to answer their question seriously until Taehyung suddenly heard you speak up, surprised eyes flickering to you. 

“Hmm, if I had to say..” You were hesitant, Taehyung shocked you were even answering. 

What would you say? 

“He has nice, big hands.” You admitted softly, Taehyung’s brows raising with surprise. “He has a nice voice, too, and... his smile.” You added as you nodded to yourself, confirming your own list and Taehyung was left damn near speechless once again. 

He didn’t really know how to act, acknowledging his face as the most common thing people liked about him, rarely ever hearing those aspects of himself mentioned. 

And he oddly felt.. nice.

“Awh, now that’s cute, good job, Y/N.” Jungkook praised you, Hoseok then pointing his make-believe mic in Taehyung’s direction. 

“Your turn, Chairman Kim, what do you like most about your wife?” He mimicked an interviewer and everyone followed in accordance, mics shifting towards him. 

“Uhh..” Taehyung became slightly nervous under everyone’s scrutiny, not knowing if he should assume his usual unreadable nature or answer their request truthfully. 

“Tae, dude, if you don’t say anything then I will.” Jungkook declared, just about ready to speak again until you cut him off, snorting. 

“Don’t sweat it, guys. He won’t say anything.” You really knew Taehyung would have nothing to say, so you crossed your arms and became uninterested in the conversation.

Until Taehyung spoke. 

“She does this pouting thing.. with her lips. It’s cute.” Taehyung started, coming up to rub the back of his neck awkwardly and peer at anything but a pair of eyes. “Her height.. and her eyes. She has nice eyes.” 

The floor had to be tired of you by now, because Taehyung seemed to make you want to fall hard pretty often. You didn’t know what to do, eyes blown and nearly on the verge of choking, unable to believe a Godly being like Taehyung just admitted to liking something about you. 

Is this what it feels like to win at life?

His words kept ringing in your head, melting into a shy mess with your cheeks beyond hot, avoiding eye contact with everyone while Taehyung grew slightly embarrassed, similarly looking off to the side. 

“Holy shit, you guys are actually cute.” Jimin remarked through a chuckle as he  pointed at you both, you and Taehyung mirroring the same look of horror while protesting at the same time. “No we aren’t!” 

And it only made the men crack up even harder. 

It was laugh after laugh as that conversation went on, finding a quick and pleasant liking to Taehyung’s friends. They’d made it clear as day they liked you as well, to be precise they seemed to love you, making playful nudges at Taehyung for saying yes to someone just right for him; and you seriously pondered what that exactly meant. 

It was further into the night now, the gala having picked up in activity and passed the long social hour, now leading into more of a party scene as upbeat music filled the hall. 

You’d stuck with Taehyung the whole night as promised, having met more of the people he knew. The evening had been quite calm, both you and Taehyung having silently, though mutually ignored the conversation from before for sanity purposes, only focusing on the additional people you met. 

Taehyung and yourself had been talking up a storm with Jimin for the past half an hour, Taehyung introducing him as his best friend and getting the full run down of how that came about. It was highly entertaining, listening to mentions of alcohol, 4AM fighting and even an incident with dumplings. 

It had you three laughing merrily while music played, Taehyung’s arm draped around you like it had been for majority of the night, practically hugging you to him. He was elaborating on a story that had something to do with a dream-catcher, all smiles and giggles. 

That was until Taehyung suddenly froze next to you, sight seeming to set on a person behind Jimin and he immediately changed his aura. 

“Jimin, what the fuck? Did you invite him?” Taehyung cocked his head in the general direction, eyes set hard. 

Jimin’s eyebrows shot up and and casually looked behind him, registering the culprit himself and turning back to Taehyung. “Holy shit, no, I didn’t.” 

“Then why is he here?” 

“Fuck, I don’t know, Tae. My parents probably invited him, I’m sorry.” Jimin apologized as he rubbed the back of his neck, growing apprehensive.

“Don’t worry, Jimin. It’s just.. not him, not fucking him.” Taehyung’s voice grew a little darker, almost hateful as his hand gripped around you tighter.  

“Taehyung, what’s wrong?” You asked tentatively, though didn’t exactly get a response since Taehyung became distracted, talking more so to himself. 

“Why the fuck is he here of all people? Of all damn people..” Taehyung scoffed to himself humorlessly, clearly annoyed. 

“Taehyung, who?” 

“Nobody, we’re getting a drink. Jimin, please?” Taehyung and Jimin had a conversation with their eyes, Jimin immediately nodding and moving towards a certain man you barely caught sight off before Taehyung was pulling you away. You tried protesting, but the tightened grip around you and Taehyung’s frustrated expression was enough to shut you up. 

Something was seriously wrong. 

You followed him along quietly until you heard a bit of a commotion behind you, able to distinguish Jimin’s voice protesting. You almost looked back until a stranger suddenly snuck up on Taehyung, draping an arm over him. 

“Kim Taehyung! Where you going? Damn, it’s been long.” The man spoke as he lowered his hand to Taehyung’s back, nearly smacking it as though they were old time buddies. 

Though the expression that painted Taehyung’s face said completely otherwise; he looked extremely irritated, and not the playful type. 

“Hisung, yeah, it has.” Taehyung bleakly acknowledged him, said man with an arm still draped over Taehyung’s shoulders until he shrugged him off harshly, pulling you closer to him protectively.

It made the man direct his attention to you. “Oh, this is your wife, right? Nice to meet you, Han Hisung.” The man smiled and extended his hand, not knowing if you should extend yours until Taehyung blatantly cut the man off, physically blocking his hand. 

“Skip the pleasantries, Hisung, what do you want?” You were shocked to see this emotion on Taehyung; rarely having seen him frustrated, trying to manage his annoyance as he gave Hisung a dead stare, intimidating as ever. 

Though Hisung didn’t cower like everyone else did, seeming to rather thrive.

“I don’t want anything. I can’t just meet your wife?” He coated his tone condescendingly, gesturing towards you. 

“No, you can’t. We’re getting a drink.” Taehyung seriously seemed bothered as he began walking you away with him, the harder squeeze of his hand around you indicating he was either growing more irritated, didn’t want to let you go, or a mix of both. 

“Oh, c’mon.” Hisung pulled Taehyung back by the shoulder but Taehyung becomes irritated, shoving his arm away harshly. 

“Not now, Hisung. Not at Jimin’s event.” Taehyung warned him as though he was crossing a fine line, and you grew afraid of what would occur if that were compromised.  

“What, I’m not doing anything.” Hisung held out his arms, feigning innocence. “I gotta say though, if I wanted one thing it’d be to say your wife’s hot as fuck.” He cocked an eyebrow and began eyeing you in your dress, growing uncomfortable and sending him a dirty look, though you naturally leaned closer towards Taehyung and he took notice. 

“Say that again I’ll make you regret it, Hisung.” Taehyung’s jaw was locked, a protective feeling overwhelming him. 

“You’re seriously gonna introduce her to everyone but me?” Hisung looked offended. “She should know who I am, especially to you.” He tried making a point, eluding to something between them. 

“Nah, I don’t think so.” Taehyung flat out rejected him, his expression blunt as he seemed to radiate unbothered energy. 

“I think you should. She should know the kind of man her husband is, and what he’s done.” He said knowingly, in a daunting way that accused Taehyung of something that seemed deeper than it looked.  

“There’s nothing to know, and I never did anything.” Taehyung simply denied, as though he’s said this multiple times.

“Really? You don’t wanna tell her about how you sabotage people? Use your money to buy success?” 

Taehyung had to pinch the bridge of his nose, sighing out frustrated. “For fuck’s sake, how many times do I have to tell you? I’ve never done shit like that. Leave.” Taehyung finalized, attempting to control his anger.

You were trying to remain calm and look on objectively, though felt a sense of worry for where this was going, only Taehyung’s seemingly instinctive guard on you keeping you from anxiety. 

Hisung scoffed, “You know, your wife should know how much of a fucking liar you are.” He spat, his vision suddenly growing narrowed as he eyed you both suspiciously. “Come to think of it, wife kinda sounds like a stretch.” 

This time it wasn’t even Taehyung responding, you beating him to the punch. “Excuse me? The fuck does that mean?” 

“Oh, so she talks.” 

You were just about stepping forward to give this asshole a piece of your mind until Taehyung suddenly gripped onto your arms from behind, pulling you to him protectively.

“Hisung, what the fuck do you want?” Taehyung’s tone was leveled with a sense of controlled rage, clear effort to contain himself and you were completely understanding of that. 

“Not much. I just find your marriage suspicious, and if I do then others do too. Wouldn’t want to taint the precious Kim reputation with that, now would we?” The remark was sly, causing Taehyung’s hold around you to tense.  

“What the fuck are you implying, exactly? Try making some sense.” 

“Your marriage isn’t convincing, jackass. There’s no way you two are really married, don’t think I don’t know there’s something behind it.” He stared squarely back at Taehyung, determined. “And when I get my hands on that information, don't think you're the only one who can sabotage someone.” Hisung was resolute as he declared his threat, only making Taehyung more resentful, more rash. 

“Your opinion doesn’t matter to me, jackass. Nothing you do does” Taehyung was confident in the argument and it oddly made you proud, now understanding why he was so successful and well-acclaimed. It’s like he truly didn't care what others thought and only lived for the purpose of what he found important to him, contributing to his confidence and composed approach towards life. He carried himself with an affirmed sense of self-worth that never bordered egotistical, and you were lying if you said it wasn’t hot sometimes. 

Because scratch that, it was incredibly hot. 

Hisung laughed humourlessly, hissing. “I don’t think we can say the same about Mrs. Kim, though, her opinion should matter to you, right?” He then suddenly turned his vision to you and drew closer, speaking in a superficially saccharine tone. “Jagiya, you should really look into who your husband is. He’s not half the man he says he is.” Hisung suddenly came too close and Taehyung immediately tugged you behind him, shielding your smaller frame as his tone dangerously darkened. 

“Don’t call her that, and never fucking come near her.” Taehyung was seething now, clutching one of your hands so tightly you became worried of his heightened emotions.

“Nah, I don’t think so.” Hisung mimicked him. “She should know I’d treat her better than her asshole of a husband, make sure she’s nice and satisfied with how much of a man I am compared to you.” Hisung remarked without a single care, and you nearly felt the blooding searing in Taehyung’s veins. 

But you could tell that was exactly Hisung’s goal; to rile Taehyung up and it unfortunately worked. No longer was the calm, cool and collected Taehyung you knew, instead feeling him suddenly rush towards Hisung with a fist until you gripped onto his jacket from behind, calling his name. 

“Tae.” Your voice was soft, immediately stopping him as you clutched urgently. Taehyung could hear the frailty of your worried voice, could feel your little hold on his jacket as he came to his senses.

Taehyung grinded his teeth hard as his fist tightened for a mere second before steadily loosening, calming himself down before he made his last remark. “Go fuck yourself, Hisung.” Taehyung spat with pure disdain as he turned around and swept up your hand, leading you away from the situation as far as possible. 

He pulled you along hastily, walking with a sense of speed that almost had you tripping on your dress. You were seconds from telling him to slow down until he stopped you both in a hallway.

“Taehyung, wh-” You almost got out until Taehyung suddenly pushed you up against the nearest wall, breath hot and heavy as he huffed frustratedly, raw anger written all over him. 

Taehyung’s entire towering body was unexpectedly inches from you, his forearms laid against the marble tiling above your head as he hung his own low, almost trying to conceal his face into your shoulder. It’s like he was blocking you off from any other person, defensively caging you as his chest rose and fell shallowly with white hot anger, your face tucked into his shoulder. His heated breath was continuously tickling the exposed skin of your neck, so close your heart was beating faster than it should’ve. 

You were only left shocked, hands fallen slack by your sides and unable to move. 

“I’m sorry.” He huffed out suddenly. “Fuck, I’m so sorry I’m just.. really angry right now and I can’t calm down.” Taehyung seemed infuriated though worried, his hands clutching into fists above you as he leaned in even closer, mere centimeters between you two as he remained pressed into your personal space.

“Shit, don’t be scared I just-fuck, I hate him. He’s the only person who makes me so angry.” Taehyung breathed out frustratedly, eyes shut as he tried to control himself. “And fuck, I didn’t want him near you. I don’t want him to talk to you. I don’t want anyone to fucking come near you.” 

Taehyung’s confessions kept coming and you were simply taken aback, another show of his emotions on full display and you wondered how he always so neatly composed himself.

“Tae-”

“Just stay in front of me, please.” He begged. “Where I can see you, just stay here.” He stressed, trying his best to breathe properly but only failed. “I don’t.. think I like when other guys are around you.” He confessed out of nowhere, trying to work through the claim hesitantly at first until he eventually nodded, affirming it. 

“Yeah, I don’t like it.” He declared as he continued to lean in, his proximity allowing for you to constantly smell his intoxicating, Invictus cologne; its sexy scent paired with his perfectly tailored suit hugging the curves of his large, broad body only arousing your nerves. 

“God, fuck.” He huffed out. “No matter what, stay away from Hisung. Never talk to him. He ruins everything he touches, every fucking thing.” Taehyung was dead serious, still hiding his face from you as he spoke angrily near your ear. “He’s been trying to ruin me for years. He’s already tried with everything else and he’ll come for you. He can’t ruin our marriage, and I swear to God if he fucking does anything to you-”

“Taehyung, hey, shh.” You brought your hands up to his chest to try calming him down, able to discern Taehyung ever rarely grew angry and when he did, just needed someone to quell his troubles. “Breathe, Taehyung, breathe, okay?” You spoke with a soft tone, trying to contrast the white hot anger you could sense in him by rubbing his chest pacifyingly. 

Taehyung immediately tensed at the action, almost in shock until he ultimately tried to breathe, slow and steady. 

“There you go, that’s better.” You encouraged into his shoulder, hands resting and lightly massaging as you inquired. “Talk to me, Taehyung, what’s wrong? Who’s Hisung?” 

“Fuck, I’ll get angry again.” He warned, breath still hot and heavy as you smoothed over his dress shirt, trying to soothe him.  

“It’s okay. I’m here, Tae, you have me. Tell me anything.” You assured and attempted to mirror his own words from a week ago, worried about his open show of emotions and thinking you should be helpful, make sure you're supplying all the support he needs because he may never be this open again. 

Taehyung’s temper was still high, more of his hot breath on your shoulder as he spoke, lips still by your ear and the bass in his voice sending currents through you. 

“It goes back 3 years, rival companies.” He began. “His father was dismissed as CEO and they held a shareholders meeting to decide a new one. Long story short, he won the vote, but only by a 49-51 percent margin. He barely scrapped by, and after he was appointed CEO he found out his major shareholders voted against him. What made things worse was that right after, they pulled all their shares from his company and invested in mine, and he fucking-” Taehyung was growing frustrated again recounting the story, his body rising and falling faster until your hands snaked up to his jaw, fingers splaying across his cheeks as you held his face pacifyingly. 

“Taehyung, breathe again. You’re fine.” You felt him listen to you, breathing deeply as he became more composed again, continuing.

“He thinks I sabotaged him, that I colluded with his shareholders and used my money when I never did. I only had acquainted relationships with them at the time and never convinced them of anything. They told me they chose to invest because they saw me as the better company, the more competent CEO.” Taehyung was venting, and you let him exactly do so by attentively listening, holding him. 

“It wasn’t my fault, but he thinks it is. And now he’s made it his life’s mission to ruin mine, ruin anything he can get his hands on because he’s convinced I ruined his.” Taehyung sounded upset, clearly fed up with having to deal with such an incessant pain in the ass. 

“Just not you,” He sounded like he was pleading, a whisper. “Not fucking you, he can’t ruin us, or our marriage.”  

“He won’t, Taehyung. We won’t let him.” The pads of your thumbs smoothed over Taehyung’s skin, trying to ease him as he moved back slightly, vision meeting yours.

“Y/N, I don’t lie. I wouldn’t sabotage anybody, I don’t play dirty like that. Even if the business world is riddled with people like that, I would never do it. I’m not like that at all.” A hint of desperation leaked into his tone, eyes gentle as he so emphatically tried to convince you he was nothing like Hisung said. 

And you found your heart softening thinking about the fact that it affected him so much. That while he didn’t care what others thought of him, he somehow valued what you thought. 

“Taehyung, don’t worry, I know, okay? You’re completely fine. He just tries to rile you up because he knows you’re better, more competent.” You slid your hands back down over his neck, letting them rest over his strong chest again. It made your breaths uneven, registering how close he was to you, just inches from your face. 

“He probably knows those shareholders chose you because you’re the better CEO. He knows it, he just tries to deny the truth by looking for ways to ruin your life, so he doesn’t have to accept he’s inferior.” You offered earnestly, rhythmically smoothing him over. Taehyung’s eyes suddenly swirled with a sense of ease, his tense body now seeming to relax. “You think so?” 

“Of course, Tae. You’re nothing like that, I know you’re not.” You said determinedly, gripping his shirt lightly to drive your point forward, eyes conveying warmth. 

Though the response that met you was Taehyung gazing into your eyes boldly as he heard you address him so casually by a nickname already, his look containing something you couldn’t decipher, and it left butterflies swarming your chest. 

You didn’t realize how intoxicatingly close you both were in this position; Taehyung’s arms caging you against the wall, body pressing into you as he looked at you, not breathing hard anymore but hotly, like he was feeling something he was attempting to manage. Your hands funnily contrasted the size of his chest as he glanced at them, then up at him, clutching him a little tighter the more the tension seemed to build.  

It was obvious now, both of you were merely staring at each other, Taehyung’s Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed and your eyes followed the movement, something unknown alighting inside you at the image. It called necessary attention to his sculpted neck and you found yourself wondering if you’d ever get to lay kisses on it, possibly even mark it

You bit your lip at the thought, hating that such an idea dawned on you, igniting with something unholy the more you breathed in his sexy scent, his large body enclosing you. It sent chills down your spine, trying to contain yourself by shifting and clamping down on your lip harder.

Taehyung’s eyes flickered to the very action, his undivided attention now on your mouth. He could feel every harder squeeze of your hands on his chest as the heat rose, fisting his own hands against the wall with the need to draw himself closer to you, especially with the way you looked right now. 

Taehyung already couldn’t keep his hands off you when you resembled the hottest, and yet most gorgeous thing he’s ever seen in that dress. Either a sweet angel descended from heaven or the right kind of demon he craved. It was even more difficult knowing it’s a dress he chose, adoring the way you were wrapped up in his favourite colour, and thought red has never looked better on anyone else.

It also made him think of some things he shouldn’t speak aloud. Though Taehyung knew you, and knew you weren't ready for anything of that sort, so he remained collected and only stuck to having an arm around you tonight, mindful of boundaries. 

But when you were under his scrutiny, smaller self tucked against a wall because of him and clearly hot and bothered yourself, your exposed skin raking his brain, he couldn’t keep from nearing your lips. 

He’s once felt how soft they were before, seeing on multiple occasions how plushy they truly are and desiring to feel that same soft sensation again. So he disregarded all thought, coming forward inch by inch as he gauged your response, and when he viewed you fluttering your eyes shut and lifting your head towards him, he fought back cracking a smirk. 

Taehyung was milliseconds from connecting your mouths, feeling the skin of his lips blissfully brush yours as his sweet breath invaded your mouth, only for a frantic voice suddenly calling out his name to interrupt, the very culprit tumbling into the hallway. 

“Taehyung! Y/N- oh shit.” Taehyung immediately ducked his face away from you and you hastily let him go, Taehyung puffing out frustrated air as he met his friends’ eyes. “Jimin.. what?” 

“I-uh. I’m sorry, but I got Hisung kicked out and we’re gonna start the last toast. You guys should um...be there.” Jimin cleared his throat and began shuffling, avoiding eye contact with the both of you. 

“Okay, we’re coming.” 

“Sorry, again.” Jimin bowed lightly and nearly made a break for it. 

Taehyung sighed heavily, pushing himself off the wall and straightening up as he freed you, finally able to breathe peacefully. 

“We should um.. go.” He voiced awkwardly.

“Yeah.. just give me a second. I’ll be back from the restroom.” You dared to make eye contact with him to seem unaffected, though panicked the instant your gazes locked.

“Okay.” He nodded, seeming unbothered.

You grasped the skirt of your dress and your heels clacked against the tiled flooring as you scurried off, needing to find the bathroom to see whether or not you appeared as much of a mess as you felt. 

You bolted inside and ran towards the sink, spotting two women possibly your age by the mirror though ultimately ignored them, patting over your cheeks to feel how warm they were. 

Were you really just seconds away from kissing Taehyung? Kissing him? What would’ve happened if Jimin never walked in? Would you have kissed him for however long, would you have stopped it? 

Even better question, why didn’t you stop it? Why were you so ready to kiss him, maybe even excited by the very idea? It sent a chill down your spine, even recalling that Taehyung stated earlier he liked your lips. 

Kim Taehyung liked your lips, the same ridiculously high-status, wealthy man people were on their knees for, practically Seoul’s most powerful CEO and Korea’s seemingly unattainable bachelor; that same Taehyung was the one who liked not only your lips, but your height, even your eyes. 

He said they were nice. 

You didn’t even want to unbox the entire Hisung situation. He so naturally defended you, even held you back out of consideration for your safety it seemed, and it frightened you how much you liked it, liked that he was so protective and made all those confessions about disliking other men around you.

It may have been possessive, but you fucking liked it. 

And you already felt doomed. 

You were simply imploding on yourself, having your own personal meltdown when one of the two women audaciously addressed you, tone light and airy. 

“Oh my God, are you Min Y/N?” She inquired. 

You flashed your eyes to her, answering with furrowed eyebrows. “Uh, Kim Y/N now, but yes.” 

“Wow, so you’re the woman Kim Taehyung married?” The other one perked up. 

“..Yes.” You answered confused.  

The other woman really scoffed here, scoffed, “Song-i, it’s the other way around. She married him.” The rather rude looking woman clarified, and you found out right after just how rude she was. “The Kim Taehyung would never willingly marry someone like her.” 

Your expression immediately contorted, unbelieving of her audacity. “Excuse me?” 

“Don’t think we’re stupid, everyone knows you seduced him into it.” She nearly spat, tone snobby as ever. 

You guffawed humourlessly, truly having it up to here with today because it seemed never-ending with bullshit. “Think what you want, but I didn’t seduce him.” 

“We know you’re lying, he wouldn’t marry some runaway like you. You came out of nowhere, you clearly got into his bed before you got him to the altar.” The other one added on, painting their twisted narrative together. 

“It wasn’t like that all, but if you want to think so because you’re not the one he takes home at night, then be my fucking guest.” You countered them, look sharp enough you were sure you could cut a diamond. 

They both took immediate offence, having the audacity to near you and invade your personal space. “You’re not the only woman he’s taken home, do you really think you’re special?” She insinuated something you weren’t dumb enough to not catch, heart sinking at the thought. 

“What exactly are you trying to get at?” 

“The fact that he married you as a favour, you runaway, and everyone knows your marriage isn’t love at all.” She relayed with a snippy tone. “Don’t you get you’re just charity to him? Everyone knows it, sweetie.” 

You were trying hard to think of a way to counter, though your stinging heart took the jab like it was white hot lightning. You felt crushed within seconds at the comment hitting home, sinking lower until you spoke up. 

“Our marriage isn’t your business. Maybe try getting a life before you revolve it around mine.” You spat as you sent them a petty look, making your way out and almost exiting until you felt a splash of water hitting the back of your hair, mouth falling agape at the sheer audacity of what just fucking happened. 

“Your life is fucking miserable. You’ll stay by his side but he’ll never love you. Keep acting like your his real wife and see what’ll happen. Everyone hates you and how you made him marry you out of pity. Watch your back, runaway, you never know when he might end it all and break your little heart.” You almost, almost turned around to land a right hook across the girl’s face until you decided against it, composing yourself with a breathing mantra and instead choosing your favourite way of leaving a bad situation. 

With a snarky last word. 

“Seems he’s already broken yours with this ring, huh? Stay mad at the ring bitches, stay mad at the ring.” You smiled condescendingly as you flaunted Taehyung’s twelve thousand dollar ring, walking out of the bathroom despite their exclamations and practically marching towards the hall, seething. 

You arrived inside and plopped down on your seat next to Taehyung bitterly, utterly vexed as you crossed your arms and grinded your teeth. 

“Hey, where were you?” Taehyung asked. “You missed the toast.” 

“Could’ve done it without me anyway.” You replied curtly, all the information you received in just 2 minutes ruling your thoughts and sending you into a storm of anger, spoiling your mood. 

Taehyung became confused. “Are you okay? What happened?”

“Nothing.” You huffed and reached for your glass of water, taking a large swig and nearly slamming it back onto the table. 

Taehyung reacted surprised. “Seriously, what’s wrong?” He became apprehensive of your mood, grabbing your hand on the table gently as he searched for your eyes. 

Though he instead found your eyes flashing towards something else, someone else before you snatched your hand away, eyes set cold.  

“I said nothing.” 

Taehyung followed your previous line of sight and landed on two women finding their seats a few tables away, their own eyes immediately deflecting from him once he made eye contact.

And it really only took two seconds for Taehyung to connect the dots, recognizing their faces. 

Taehyung sighed heavily, feeling guilty and suddenly apologetic about the possible situation, knowing something must have been said to you. 

He turned back around, “Y/N, what happened?” He tried inquiring again, though you responded with absolutely nothing, completely crossed and avoiding him. 

He exhaled tiredly, this day having been the epitome of a joke. Taehyung was scanning over you again when he suddenly noticed the ends of your hair, distinguishing they were wet and he found it strange. “Y/N, why the fuck is your hair wet?” He was moving to touch the damp parts until you evaded him, tone rigid. 

“Nothing, Taehyung.” 

Taehyung sighed again, frustrated as he once again put two-and-two together, remembering you’d all come from the restroom and addressed you. “What did they say, Y/N? Tell me right now, is that why your hair’s wet?” 

“No, Taehyung, nothing happened,” You stressed, turning your body even further away from him and crossing your arms tighter. 

Taehyung determined he’s truly had enough of today and rose from his seat, you noticing though choosing to ignore him. Taehyung quickly resolved he was going to fix this, beyond agitated this entire day had been damned to hell. He was having a good time too, especially keeping in mind whatever in God’s name was happening between you two, and only knowing that it made him inexplicably happy for some reason. 

Though that mood was ruined now, Taehyung shaking away his thoughts as he began plotting his approach towards your situation, entirely pissed off as he made his way towards the bar, concocting his plan. 

It took Taehyung only a good 10 minutes to get what he needed, snatching the nicest bottle of champagne and trying to remember where he’d observed the two women sitting, strolling his way over to the table with his fakest grin.  

“Good evening, ladies.” He greeted with a saccharine tone as he neared them. 

“Oh my God, Taehyung!” One of the girls beamed. “We haven’t seen you so long, what are you doing here?” 

“Yeah, too long!” 

“It has.” Taehyung smiled. “I actually wanted to offer this.” Taehyung then revealed the bottle of champagne from behind his back, holding it out towards them. 

The two women became elated, practically cheering as they clearly admired Taehyung more than he liked. “Oh wow! Thank you so much!” One of them thanked, receiving the bottle bashfully. 

“You’re too kind, Taehyung, did you really get this for us?” The other inquired, a bright smile on her face. 

“Actually, I didn’t.” 

Both women looked at each other confused, eyebrows furrowed. “You.. didn’t?” 

“No,” Taehyung responded with a bleak expression in near offence they’d assume that, smile wiped from his face. “You both did.”

“Wh-what?” They both questioned, incredulous. 

“I put it on your tabs, geniuses. There’s 6 more bottles, by the way.” 

Both women’s eyes went wide, immediately protesting. “T-this is the most expensive bottle of champagne here!” They looked annoyed, and Taehyung was all about it.  

“I know.” Taehyung smiled condescendingly, drawing closer to the women and dropping his tone to a scarily low, threatening octave. 

“Say anything to my wife again and I’ll make sure you pay more.” Taehyung finalized and rubbed his tongue along the inside of his cheek as he walked away, smirking. He ignored their protests as he passed by the bartender, winking for the 6 other bottles of champagne to be delivered to them. 

Taehyung then made his way to you, now in a hurry to leave this awful night behind as he gently gripped your arm, speaking into your ear to not alert anyone else at the table. “Y/N, we’re leaving.” 

Taehyung didn’t really have to wait, you responding rapidly, “Don’t have to tell me twice.” You were already rising from your seat, done with this entire Godforsaken night yourself. 

You both stepped away together, just about reaching the hall doors until Taehyung stopped you in front, holding you by your arms. “Stay here, I’ll get your coat.” 

You nodded at him and Taehyung bolted off, wanting to nab your coat as fast as possible so he could drape it around you and practically flaunt your relationship in front of everyone. He didn’t care if it was fake anymore, didn’t care for the legitimacy of his actions; he simply wanted the world to know you’re his wife, purposely wanted those two girls and everyone to see him treating you affectionately.

And he most certainly wanted to squash any of the doubt Hisung called attention to earlier that kept bugging him, entailing your marriage already seeming fake to him, and could to multiple other people.  

So he retrieved the coats and came rushing back to you, having worn his as he approached you. You almost reached out for your coat until Taehyung halted you. 

“Don’t, I’m putting it on you.” He rounded the coat around your body, helping your arms into the sleeves. He pulled it snug around you and held onto the ends where it should’ve been buttoned, taking a moment to think. 

Taehyung simply gazed at you, licking his lips contemplating what more he could do in this moment that would be convincing enough, knowing there had to be people watching you two right now. 

He realized he was staring without having said anything. “Sorry, I’m trying to think of something to do for everyone watching but I don’t know what.” Taehyung flashed to your lips and his mind explored the idea, though ultimately fought against it. 

“People are watching?” You inquired.

“Yeah,” Taehyung clutched onto your jacket, trying to think as he looked at your little bundled up self. 

“But I’m not sure what to do-” Taehyung was cut off by you suddenly grabbing his tie and crashing your lips onto his in a single second. 

Taehyung’s eyes blew out, taken by surprise until he found himself quickly melting into your kiss, hands gripping your jacket tighter. He couldn’t help himself from opening up his mouth to catch more of yours, lips sensually kissing yours in a slow, unhurried pace. 

You instantly loved the way he kissed, Taehyung somehow having taken control when you were the one who initiated everything, completely taken by his pillowy, delicate lips. 

Taehyung didn’t care if your lipstick smudged onto him or how brash the public display of affection seemed; all he cared about was the soft feeling of your lips against his own, and the sexy way you wre tugging him by his tie.

He knew it would stay on his mind for weeks. 

You were getting lost until he disconnected your mouths, only looking at each other with undecipherable feelings, shimmering eyes that had no clue what just happened. 

Taehyung smiled before sweeping up your hand in an instant, pulling you out of the hall and eventually outside to quickly sent a text to his driver, guiding you to the curb of the venue. 

He held you against him to keep you warm while walking, suddenly speaking up when something occurred to him. 

“You called me Tae, you know.” 

“What?” 

“My nickname, you called me by it earlier.” Taehyung repeated. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I just heard your friends say it and it slipped out, I didn’t mean to-”

“Say it all you want.” Taehyung was grinning to himself like an idiot, thinking you weren’t looking at him but that’s exactly what you were doing, admiring the curve of his perfect cupid’s bow with hints of your lipstick smeared on him. “It’s better when you say it.” 

And now it was your turn to smile like an idiot. 

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tags : @thedarkwinterrose​ @ayujaded​ @couldbeyourlast​ @ladyarmanto​ @anpanman-sonyeondan​ @apollukee​ @blueevelvt​ @taesluttt​ @scalubera​ @laurynne5​ @dreamsindreamss​ @thequeen-kat​ @awsome-small-k​ @wrecklesssly​ @kweenhu​ @jalexad​ @staerify​ @bangforever​ @dyriddle​ @aianloveseven​ @waves-and-woods​ @hoefortaeshands​ @veronawrites​ @nightapple4jk​ @wataemelonz​ @aomi-nabi​ @katbonv​ @hantaev​ @jinpuddin​ @usamizuki​ @wooya1224​ @bambuzlee​ @jenotation​ @tangledsparkles​ @pcyxljh​ @forbts-only​ @dumplingley​ @ccmemoirs​ @kleritata​ @thelilbutifulthings​ @maygem2780​ @lachimolala95​ @betysotelo18​ @prettycoolting​ @opaljm​ @jeonlovers​ @honeyboocal​ @preciouschimine​ 

[bjornswoman]

hey babe! Do you take requests ? İf you do, could you do a story with these prompts? And ofc with bjorn please?

Prompts : "Would you do the same for me?” & "don’t touch me!” &

“Did you ever care about us? Or was that another one of your lies?”

False promises

Requested by @bjornsholyarmring.

Author's note: Hey guys! I hope that is what you had asked. If it isn't, let me know and I will write it again the way you want it to be. Also, sorry for being inactive for so long, I had some problems that needed to be fixed. I ensure that I am writing stuff right now and I have a lot of work to do. Sometimes is coming stay tuned! I hope you will like this. Till the next time have fun and take care!

Pairing: Modern!Bjorn x Reader.

Genre: Modern!au, sad, romance, drama.

Summary: Bjorn has cheating on you.

Warnings: Mentions of cheating, heartbreaking.

"Is Bjorn here?" You asked Ubbe, as you were getting inside the living room of his father's mansion, trying to act like your normal self. Like you weren't crying some moments before.

After the news you received it was natural for you to cry. But you didn't want Ubbe, or any other member of his family to notice that you were crying before. You didn't want to cause a scene in front of all these people. You wanted to yell, cry, hit and yell again to Bjorn after what he did to you.

"He is coming. I talked to him some minutes ago, he is on his way. That's what he said." Ubbe answered to you and showed you the way which led in the living room.

You followed him and when you were in there, you sat on an armchair. Ubbe sat on the couch opposed to the armchair which you were sitting. Torvi, his wife, was sitting on the same couch as him. She was there before you.

"What happened to you?" Torvi asked you, noticing that something was wrong with you. You forced a fake smile on your face, trying to seem natural as two couples of eyes were examining your face.

"Nothing, I am fine. I just want to talk with Bjorn about something. That's all."

You weren't good at lying. It was obvious that you weren't fine. Both of them noticed your red eyes and the tone of your voice. You were angry and sad at the same time.

You weren't even looking at them. You didn't want them to understand —which they did.

"Is everything alright between you and Bjorn?" Ubbe was the one who asked this time. You looked at them both —Ubbe and Torvi. Then, you looked at the clock on the wall in front of you.

Nothing was alright between you and Bjorn. You thought that it was, but apparently you were wrong. You were wrong until you learned the whole truth. Bjorn was cheating on you the whole time. It wasn't that you were such a stupid person and you didn't notice anything. You had noticed once. You were about to leave him, but he promised to you that this wouldn't happen again. Bjorn didn't keep his promise. He cheated on you again.

All this situation made you feel bad about yourself, about your appearance. Why would he do that? Were you so ugly? Why were he even in relationship with you? And this woman. Apparently, she was better than you. He wouldn't have anything with her if she wasn't.

"Yes, everything it's perfect. Things couldn't be better." You lied.

"I—" Torvi was about to say something, but she didn't say it. She started and didn't finish. She decided not to say anything. Maybe, she didn't say anything because Bjorn entered the living room, smiling and greeted all of you.

"(Y/N), I wasn't expecting you. Did we have a date and I forgot about it? Excuse me about it, these past weeks at the company are really exhausting." He told you and you forced a smile again.

"No, no, we didn't have a date. I just wanted to talk to you about something."

You stood up next to him. He seemed curious, he didn't know what you wanted to talk about and didn't expect you to know what he did.

"Tell me."

"I would prefer to talk private." You answered him. "Excuse me guys." You referred to Ubbe and Torvi.

"Okay. Let's go upstairs." Bjorn said frowned and followed you upstairs in his room. When you were inside his bedroom, Bjorn closed the door behind him and sat on the bed. He patted the mattress next to him, motioning you to sit next to him, but you avoided him. You stayed still in front of him. Nobody talked for some seconds. "What did you want to talk about?" He asked looking straight in your eyes.

"About Porunn."

When you mentioned her name, he froze. You crossed your hands on your chest, looking at him, waiting for him to tell you the truth that you wanted to listen.

"What about her?"

You scoffed when you listened his question and looked anywhere else except him. He was enraging you. He knew exactly what you were saying. He knew that you knew everything.

"You know what I am talking about."

"I don't."

"You do."

"Honestly, I don't."

This game was pissing you off. You rolled you eyes and then you looked at Bjorn again.

"I know about your lies and your betrayal. I know that you cheated." You muttered. You tried hard not to start crying again. The tears were already in your eyes and you were fighting them.

"(Y/N), I—"

"I feel bad about myself all this time. I forgave you before and tried to feel good again, but I can't and, apparently, I'm not beautiful and good enough for you." You spoke and tears started falling from your eyes. You couldn't fight them anymore. You didn't have so much power. You felt really bad.

"(Y/N), it just happened once. I was drunk, we fought and you didn't talk to me. I didn't mean to make you feel bad. You are perfect. You are the most beautiful woman in the whole world. Give me a second chance." Bjorn said. He stood up and reached you. He extended his hand to touch you, but you didn't let him.

"Don't touch me!" You screamed and he did as you told him to. He was stood in front of you. You sighed heavy and turned around, running your hands through your head. You were really upset. You didn't know what to say. You closed your eyes and sighed again. After some seconds you opened your eyes and turned to face him again. "I feel hurt and betrayed and it's not the first fucking time. I have forgiven you before for the same thing and, now, you are asking me to forgive you. Again! What if I cheated on you, would you do the same for me? Would you forgive me? Would you give a second second chance?" You asked him, looking at him. His large hands made it to both your cheeks and wiped your tears away from your face. You didn't stop him from touching you this time.

Bjorn hesitated to answer for some time, but he did gave you an answer.

"I wouldn't."

Was the only thing that came out of his mouth. It wasn't like you didn't expect his answer. You knew that he wouldn't do the same for you. You wouldn't fall for his lies again. You had decided that you would end things with him. It hurt you, but you had no choice. You loved him and it wasn't secret, but you couldn't stay in this relationship anymore. You couldn't let him treating you like that. Nobody deserved this.

"I can't do that either. This relationship is hurting me. Your actions are hurting me. I have no choice left, but to end things with you. This relationship makes me feel bad and insecure about myself." As you were speaking, a tear fell from his blue eyes. You hated hurting, like he had hurt before, but you couldn't do that to yourself anymore. Tears were falling from your eyes too.

"I promise you that if you forgive me this time, I will be the best man for you. I love (Y/N). Please." He muttered and you closed your eyes. The tears were streaming unconditionally from your eyes. You couldn't hear him saying the word 'please'. You didn't want to give in. You didn't want to believe his fake promises again. You believed once and he didn't keep his promise.

"This isn't love. You don't cheat on the person you love and, of course, I can't trust your promises. In fact, you false promises. I did once and look what is happening now. I am the price of my silly actions." You said. Bjorn didn't answer, so you found the chance to say all those things that you needed to say. "In fact, I don't believe that you ever cared about me. All you care about is yourself. You just wanted to have your fun with me and at the same time you had fun with other women too when I was too boring for you."

All the time you were talking, you were crying too.

Your words hurt him. They made him angry too.

"That's not true!" He screamed angry.

"Yeah, yeah." You scoffed "Did you ever care about us? Or was that another one of your lies?" You asked like you hadn't heard any word of his.

"Are you even listening to what I am saying?" He asked angry and you scoffed again.

"No. Now fucking answer to me!" You yelled and he run his hand through his blonde hair.

"Yes, I fucking did! I fucking do! I fucking love you! For fuck's sake!" He yelled too and placed a cigarette on his lips. Before he could light it up, uou threw it away of his mouth.

You didn't like when he smoked. It was bad for him and really unhealthy. It was killing him.

"This kills you!" You yelled again, before he could say anything about his cigarette. "And I don't trust you anymore. We are done, Bjorn." You said and placed your hand on your mouth to stop yourself from sobbing.

"(Y/N)." He muttered your name and gripped your arm firmly to stop you from leaving him.

"No, Bjorn. It's better this way. All this was a lesson for both of us." You spoke softly and placed your hand on his to take it away from your arm. "I love you, Bjorn. I will always love you." You said, as you were taking his hand away from your arm. Tears were covering both your faces. The image of him crying were tearing your heart apart, but you couldn't act otherwise. It was the best choice for both of you.

"I love you, (Y/N)."

This was the last thing you heard before you got out of his room and his house.

After that day you hadn't seen Bjorn again for a long time. Later, you heard that he got married with Porunn and had a child, a daughter, with her. You felt happy for him. You loved him and because of that you wanted him to be happy. Apparently, Porunn made him happy.

Some things aren't made to last, one of them was your relationship with Bjorn. Because you couldn't be together didn't mean you didn't love each other. He loved you with his own way that you couldn't understand and you loved him with yours. But love isn't always enough for relationships. Trust is important too, along with other stuff.

Maybe you will be together in another life if that thing exists.

[gutwrenchflowerbomb]

Alright so Lee said to watch the gentleman’s club silver edition Forza Lucha match against Ladies Night. 

Drinks: 2 and 1/6th  double screwdrivers

Horny Level: Yellow (hand drawn horny gauge coming soon)

Alright so this is like 5-6 years ago ro so, I don’t care enough to look it up. Anyway we got meat Man best pizza boy John Silver, Freshly squeezed Orange Cassidy and Kentucky Gentleman Chuck Taylor BA Hellen Vale, Vanity and Terra Calaway. Let’s fucking goooooo

John Silver looks so small muscles wise compared to what he look like now. 

Chuckie is showing off them calves and I’m eating eat up like some Victorian asshole getting a flash of ankle. What a slut.

Orange my guy I don’t even know how much longer you can call what your got on jeans. You look like when after the Hulk goes back to being Bruce Banner

All of these ladies are perfect and I will say no more

“Daddy came to get the smooches” - I’m sorry but I am not calling this petite blond young man Daddy when he’s out here asking for shit with a lisp.

(Please Note: I would absolutely call him daddy if he asked me to, even if I didn’t believe in it. I’m nothing if not a people pleaser who likes to build confidence)

I would give at least one if my toes to be able to chop Orange Cassidy as hard as I could just to see how pink that sumbitch got.

LOL he corpsed at John’s big ol’ boobies comment.

I wonder if giant titties make chops actually hurt more or less? Either way they were not effective on Terra. Orange calls for Dustin, breaking kayfabe brother

Update; 2 1/2 double screwdrivers

Vanity tossing Chuckles so hard he had to leave the ring and go to the street.

Raw Dog Meat Man baby John Silver in against Hellen and she looks like she’s finna murder him with her hot ass skeleton gear. I love bones.

She is eatin his fuckin luuuunch...wait now he’s on vended knee? Side note: that’s like top 3 fav boys II men songs for me

Yeah dude she said no what the fuck? Have y’all even met? Dry them tears.

Oh no he super kicked her to death. Wait no she’s a skeleton she can’t die again dummy

Orange’s smile is something I both hate immensely and love unconditionally and he’s doing it and the thumbs up as these two men attack this tiny skeleton woman

Commentary talkin bout how in shape Chuck looks and hey, newsflash dudes: any shape Chuck is in is goddamn perfect. To me he is forever “boyfriend” shaped.

And he is sticking up for his friend who’s heart was just broken? Commendable

Listen, I don’t care how hot you are I will always despise spitting. I legit would rather get someone’s fucking blood on me than have them spit on me.

“Hey. I said I was getting a kith. I’m getting a kith” Orange. Baby. You cannot force a kiss from anyone. That is what we call sexual assault. That’s very bad.

Like, how many times has OC kissed Chuck at this point? Gotta be at least 7 right? And man the power of Orange’s kith is so strong it turned Silver gay. He said so himself.

Listen. As a larger lady myself I get such satisfaction from watching Terra Calaway just manhandle these dudes.

Orange just tried to low blow Vanity and thinks he was successful. Ergo: Orange has never touched or seen a vagina

Ever the valiant hero Chuck, here to protect his friend’s nuts.

Lots of nut shots here. Makes me wonder if this was a custom someone ordered 🤔🤔

I mean. There’s just so much happening here. I will say I miss OC using that knife edge thrust. Kane did that shit all the time and it was doooooope

It really hurts to see someone living your dream- RE: Terra slamming Orange like he weighs fucking nothing

Ladies Night with the win 💕💃👩‍❤️‍👩

[avengerscompound]

The Stars Map the Way

The Stars Map the Way: A Bruce Banner Fanfic

Buy me a ☕ Square: @brucebannerbingo​ - R2 Crown

Rating:  G

Warning:  Weddings

Word Count:  1760

Pairing:  Bruce Banner x Reader

Summary:  It’s your wedding day and Bruce has aligned the stars to guide you to him.

The Stars Map the Way

The reflection looking back at you in the mirror didn’t seem totally real to you.  It was an idealized version.  Something from a fairytale.  You looked like a princess, both beautiful and magical.  You smoothed down the skirt.  The satin and lace glittering with crystals as they shifted in the light.

Your bridesmaid stepped up beside you and placed your tiara on your head.  It glittered in silver and diamonds and sat on your head so your veil fell down behind it and a small emerald rested in the middle of your forehead that matched the two teardrop-shaped jewels from your ears.

“You look beautiful,” she said.  “Like a queen.”

“You think he’ll like it?” You asked.

She chuckled and gently pinched your cheek.  “I think you could show up in a hessian sack and he’d look at you like you hung the stars in the sky.”

“So you’re saying I wasted a lot of time and money to make myself look like this?”  You asked.

She laughed.  “Come on, your prince is waiting for you.  You don’t want him to think you’re not coming.”

You chuckled softly and nodded.  “No.  That would not end well for anyone.”

She handed you your bouquet of white rose, eucalyptus leaves, and fern fronds and the two of you went outside to the vintage Rolls Royce that was waiting for you outside.  She helped you in, making sure your skirt didn’t get caught anywhere it shouldn’t and the car made its way through the New York Streets.  The sun was setting and it sent beams of orange light up the streets as the sky above you turned pink.

It pulled up at the American Museum of Natural History and you climbed the stone steps and went inside.  The halls were mostly empty, only staff members and the occasional stray visitor making their way back out.

Each staff member you passed directed you to where you were going.  Up the stairs and to the large sphere that housed the planetarium.

Pepper and Laura were waiting outside with Morgan and Nathaniel.  Morgan wore a white dress with a green sash and held a basket of flower petals, while Nathaniel had a little black suit on and held a green satin pillow with your rings tied to it.

“Wow, look at you,” Pepper said smiling.  “You look like a princess.”

“Thank you,” you said.  “I feel like I’m gonna be sick.”

She laughed and rubbed your arm.  “He’s looking a little green himself.  So you might want to get in there.”

“Are you ready?”  Laura asked.

You nodded and the staff opened the door.  You heard the harp start-up and Pepper and Laura ducked inside to take their seats.

“And I'd give up forever to touch you, 'cause I know that you feel me somehow, you're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be, and I don't want to go home right now.”  As words floated out from inside the dome, you sent Morgan inside and she made her way down the aisle, scattering flower petals as she went.

“And all I can taste is this moment, and all I can breathe is your life, and sooner or later it's over, I just don't wanna miss you tonight.”  Nathaniel went in after him, looking up at the ceiling as he half skipped/half jogged his way down the aisle.

“And I don't want the world to see me, 'cause I don't think that they'd understand, when everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am.”  Your bridesmaid went next, walking down the center of the room slowly.  You started to psych yourself up, bringing your bouquet in close to your body and stepping up to the doors.

“And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming or the moment of truth in your lies.  When everything feels like the movies, yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive.”

You stepped inside the darkened room.  Above your head, the milky way glittered.  Your guests were seated in a circle around an arch in the middle, a row of small lights on the floor marked the path you needed to walk to reach it.  Standing under the arch was the celebrant, Tony Stark, Thor, and Bruce.  Bruce looked up at where you stood and his face lit up like a fire had ignited inside him.

The lights above your head changed, a bright, green glow of the Northern Lights curled out, mapping your path to your groom.

“And I don't want the world to see me, 'cause I don't think that they'd understand, when everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am.”

You began to make your way down the path, every eye on you, but none more excited than Bruce.  He was bouncing where he stood and he held his hands clenched in front of him.

“And I don't want the world to see me, 'cause I don't think that they'd understand, when everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am.”

You reached the arch and held your hands out to Bruce.  He took them, holding them tight like he was worried you might just float off on him and part of you felt like that wasn’t impossible.

The celebrant cleared his throat and began to speak, but you couldn’t take your eyes off Bruce.

“Marriage is but one path that can be taken on a course of human relationship.  No ceremony can create your marriage, no piece of paper can make it work.  Only you can do that through your love for each other and your commitment to creating it.  It takes love and patience, dedication and perseverance, talking, listening, help, support, and believing in each other.  A marriage needs tenderness and laughter, forgiveness and appreciation of each other’s differences, and making the important things matter while letting go of everything else.  All this ceremony can do is allow you both to affirm the choice you have made to stand together as lifemates and partners as you walk your paths together,” he said.  “Do you take this woman to be your wedded wife?”

Bruce took a deep breath and nodded. “I do.”

“And do you take this man, to be your wedded husband?”

You smiled and squeezed his hands.  “I do.”

“When you walk the roads your lives take you, there are many relationships that are important to help you on your way.  In the spirit of the importance of strong friendships, Natasha Romanoff will be reading from Captain Corelli’s Mandolin by Louis de Bernières,” the celebrant said.

Natasha got out of her chair and moved up to the arch.  “Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don't blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being 'in love', which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.”

She smiled at you both and took her seat again and the celebrant spoke again.  “We’ve come to the point of the ceremony where you say your vows to each other.  But before you do that, I ask you to remember that love - which is rooted in trust and acceptance - will be the foundation of your relationship.  No other ties are more tender.  No other vows stronger.  If you are able to, keep your vows here today, not because of any civic law, but out of a desire to love and be loved by another person fully and without limitation.  Please now, read the vows you have written to each other.

You cleared your throat and looked deep in Bruce’s eyes.  He gave your hands a reassuring squeeze.  “I take you to be my husband, my friend, my partner, and my love.  I promise to be patient with you when you’re in the lab working on one of your passions and forget to come home.  I promise to give you a safe and comfortable place to land when you’ve been on a mission and you’re doubting your place in the world.  I promise to listen to your excited ramblings about your new discoveries, and never once make you think I’m anything less than as excited as you are.  Mostly though, I promise to love you, every part of you, unconditionally and freely from the bottom of my heart.”

Bruce smiled and leaned in towards you a little.  You pressed your forehead against his and ran your hands up his arm.  “I take you to be my wife,” he said.  “I promise to share with you my excitement and fears of the world and let you share yours with me with safety and without judgment.  I promise to protect you when I can, but respect your choices and accept that I might not always be able to.  I promise to allow you to help carry my fears and burdens and help you carry yours too.  But most of all, I promise to love you, every part of you, unconditionally and freely from the bottom of my heart.”

“May I have the rings?”  The celebrant said.  Tony took the cushion from Nathaniel and untied them, handing them to the celebrant who then offered them to both you and Bruce.  “Now repeat after me; I give you this ring as a daily reminder of my love for you.”

You and Bruce slid the rings onto each other’s fingers.  “I give you this ring as a daily reminder of my love for you.”

“By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife!” The celebrant announced.  “You may now kiss each other.”

Bruce wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close, he leaned in, and you bridged the distance as he dipped you back.  Above you, on the domed screens the sun came out and you kissed for the first time as husband and wife.

[imaginesbymk]

“Someone New.”

Peaky Blinders One Shot

Summary: MK loves Luca unconditionally, but she has doubts whenever she thinks about how he makes a living, and she wonders if he ever loved her at all to begin with.

Pairing: Luca Changretta x Adult!Me (MK)

Tags: swearing & my really bad italian translations + my bad attempts of writing angst (inspo; this drabble)

A/N: this plot is so cheesy, and i know i don’t write au/personal imagines, but this is just a lil something i put together as a celebration for reaching 500 followers!!! one shots are not open! 

read my luca changretta x OC x tommy shelby fic Pink + White here.

THE cigarette butt was put out in the ashtray when MK occupied the study room. Luca promised her a fancy dinner date at one of the finest restaurants in New York City, but he was late. In fact, he wasn’t even home. He wasn’t dead for sure. He was smart enough to dodge that fate. Instead he was out somewhere in the busy streets, probably attending a meeting with a company MK does not know of, or maybe got too carried away with the attractions the city had to offer at night. Maybe it was another woman. Either way, her blood was boiling. 

MK was a floater. Booze was always kept in a cabinet that opened every now and then, but she never dove into the chaotic lifestyle of partying and prohibition. She never thought in a million years she would wind up falling for a man who had an equal fair share of both, as his business dealt with importing and exporting alcohol into speakeasies, and the people who worked with him were no stranger to weapons and violence. 

The theatre in New York City was packed and busy, but they met at the wrong place at the wrong time. MK snuck backstage to get a glimpse of the performers, and instead walked in on a different room. Luca was trying to negotiate a deal with the manager of the theatre, they exchanged witty comments at each other just enough to show things were about to end on, quite literally, a broken leg. 

Luca turned his head when he noticed at the corner of his eye that someone was watching them at the door, surprised to see a person who wasn’t looking for trouble for the first time. She looked too naive to hold a gun properly. He watched as the manager shouted at MK, asking what she was doing there since only employees and performers were allowed in the back section, and tries calling for security. 

“Okay, okay! I’m going!” she backed away, not before giving Luca another glance and taking off from where she entered.

She saw him again on a different night. She had completely forgotten about their previous awkward encounter, but when she saw the familiar face taking a seat next to her at the bar, she recalled seeing the look he had when they first made eye contact.

“Apparently a lady can’t drink at the bar alone. So can a gentleman join ya?” He smirks, the bartender pours him about three fingers of gin.

She was stunned to see him nights after that. New York City was wild, and men like him took many breaths away. She slowly nodded, not using her words.

Was she sure about this? The man seemed dangerous, and more experienced in anything than she’ll ever be. Of all the women that dolled themselves up for the occasion and looked tremendously beautiful and sexy, while she simply wore what she could afford at that time, why would he give his attention to her and not them?

After shyly looking down at her glass, she dared to look back at him. He was still looking at her. The butterflies in her stomach danced as if they were listening to the song the band was playing on stage. It was those eyes.

MK gave up and headed for bed since it was already late, and the restaurant Luca had the idea of taking her to was most likely closed by now. She shuts the lamp and buried herself under the sheets, bottling her frustration by just clenching her jaw. He was home when she woke up. She found him in the study in a change of clothes, his hair was falling forward post-gel, and his raspy voice spoke in Italian with the telephone pressed against his ear.

“Sono io. Diglielo che l’affare è ancora concluso.”

MK melted every time he spoke his mother tongue, this time she couldn’t bare to hear him speak. She was still upset about last night, she didn’t wanna speak to him, yet she had so much to say. She leaves him to wake herself up with coffee without the thought of preparing a cup for him too. Minutes go by and MK sips her beverage when she hears him enter the kitchen. Luca stands on the other side of the island counter, looking down at her mug.

“I’m just gonna boldly assume you didn’t make me coffee on purpose.”

“Buongiorno to you too, Luca.” She turns away so she couldn’t face him.

“MaryKate.” She felt an odd tingle in her spine. Luca almost never refers to her by her full name, not even by her other nickname, which was Kate. It was beyond weird. He walks over and cups her face. “C’mon. I’m sorry, okay? I got wrapped up with business. I was literally losing my mind because those bird brains couldn’t do simple math—”

MK was about as half ready to smash the half filled coffee mug on the floor. “My God, Luca. Business this, business that. It was your night off for the whole fucking week. You couldn’t make Matteo take over?”

Luca swore under his breath and walked back to his study.

“Where are you going?” she asks sternly.

“Back to work.” You gotta be fucking kidding me. MK watched him disappear back into the study room, and she let out a groan. The caffeine entering her bloodstreams increased her pounding heartbeat, but she quickly calmed herself when she followed him inside.

“Can I come with you to your next meeting?”

“Do you wanna meet Santa Claus too?” Luca said dryly.

“I’ve only been to one meeting. I can’t imagine the rush of power unless I’m there to feel it, and you won’t let me.”

“Yeah, damn fucking straight I won’t let you,” Luca cleared his throat. “That last meeting, those people tried to make you feel uncomfortable.” He looked up from his work from the desk and stared at MK. “I won’t let you see what’s really behind closed doors.”

But the few nights after took a whole different turn. MK wouldn’t listen, and managed to unlock Luca’s cabinet filled with his weapons, and picked out the one she thinks she was capable of using. She didn’t enjoy stealing, but proving to Luca she could be just like him and still be with him would bring them closer was on her mind. It ended with her sneaking up on the group of men Luca and his men were speaking to, and she pointed her gun at the presumable leader.

Luca’s eyes filled with dread as he froze in his spot, immediately recognizing her. Matteo grabbed the gun from MK, cursing in Italian how stupid she was and why she followed them. They were lucky the men backed down when they realized it wasn’t a good time just yet, but the worst wasn’t over.

Luca and MK’s shouts echoed their entire manor that it was enough for the neighbors to hear them.

“I can’t trust you anymore!” Luca shouted. “You realized what you could of done?! Putting yourself in danger like that?!”

“I wanted to protect you!”

“I don’t need your fucking protection!” he slams the table. “I didn’t need you to follow me, all right?” he began cursing in Italian, something MK was never able to fully understand his language one hundred percent. He held her by the shoulders. “If you ever do that shit again, I’ll—”

“You’ll what, Luca?” she pushes him. “Leave me? You’ve been pushing me aside, you forget our date nights, I end up sleeping in our bed alone, wondering if your body is laying dead on the ground! Do you have any idea how much that scares me? I get how insane it is being in the mafia, but if you can’t spare one night with me, then why am I here?”

“Y’know what, maybe you’re right. Why the fuck are you here?” MK looked at him with an icy shock. Instead of processing what he had just said, Luca turned to head back to his office. “When you gain back your fucking senses, let me know.” And he slams the door.

None of them spoke all day, too caught up in their anger to check up on each other. Luca occupied himself alone while MK wandered around the house, avoiding the corridor to his study. She checked his schedule, he had somewhere to be the following evening, no surprise. 

She stayed in the kitchen until she heard Luca’s footsteps descend from the stairs and out the front door. As soon as she heard his car drive off and having the house to herself once again, MK slides down the wall of the hallway and finally broke down into tears.

Once she calmed down, she walked up to their shared master bedroom, and packed everything she could carry in her suitcase. The last thing Luca said to her caused an aching pain in her chest. 

She could just walk out if she couldn’t take it, Luca could find another woman to sleep with without any issue. She wouldn’t be surprised if someone new entered his life a week after. It would hurt like hell, but it was the sad reality of it all.

MK walked out. No goodbyes. No telephone calls, no handwritten note, just an empty house.

_

HER old home was now owned by a friend of hers, and it contrasted the luxurious, spotless abode Luca let her stay in uptown. The taxi drive was quite long and she was exhausted, so she collapsed in the small bed, sleeping in the dress Luca had always loved seeing her wear. 

He spoiled her with riches and shared his aesthetic with hers, making sure she had her spot with fashion and art. In MK’s old home, it was decrepit. No one paid a visit because they hated the design, and no one saw her for who she really was, but Luca was different. He wanted her, and he got her. 

Days go by and MK still had the aching heartbreak in her chest as she entered downtown New York City at night to see a show in the grand theatre. She had to admit, she was bummed out when she saw how many people brought their lovers or husbands and wives to the show, and it seemed like she was the only one without either. She was alone.

MK picks up her pace and rushed inside to take her assigned seat and sighed in relief, staring at the red curtain on stage ready to come up and showcase the night, hoping to distract her from her inexplicable grieving.

The empty seat next to her was then taken, filling in the space between her and the next guest after. MK took in how the man’s fragrance was enriched and strong, and she could see the giant rings on his finger nearly covered some of the tattoos inked on his skin, including the crown tattoo on his hand, or the one on his neck which was a cross. His hat rested well on his lap and he hooked one leg on the other. His suit was clean as usual, and the cuffs on his wrist enclosed with the golden pressed buttons. 

No. Her heart raced as she turned to see his face. She was met with those eyes.

One thing she forgot to remember was the fact that Luca loved theatre, this was the theatre he usually goes to, and this was where they met. Of course he wouldn’t miss a show. He kept staring straight ahead as the loud cheers and applause erupted when the curtains rose. 

MK could barely pay attention to the performance. The tension rising between Luca’s presence and hers pressed together so tightly. He did this on purpose, MK thought. Fucking bastard!

Unless the last two empty seats were meant for them so coincidentally, as both of them bought solo tickets and wounded up next to each other. But this was insane. Luca was entitled enough to watch the shows up on the balcony for the best seats in the house, so why pick the orchestra seats?

It didn’t matter how, she never felt so uncomfortable in her entire life and couldn’t stifle her panic. 

Luca broke the ice, quietly talking over the music that transitioned to a slow chorus. “I made the owner arrange a seating. It was meant for another couple, but they never showed up.” He tries reaching for her hand when he noticed her tensing up. “MK, amore. calm down.” He looked at her with worry. “All right. I think we need to talk.”

MK broke out in an exhaled cry and got up. “Fuck this.” She carefully goes passed the seated guests before heading out the exit, running out of the theatre in tears until she could no longer breathe.

Luca chased after her onto the streets, pushing past people along the way. “MK, c’mon! Please don’t go.”

MK stopped and covers her face in her hands. “Don’t talk to me with that intimidating mafia shit, then!” Speak like a fucking human being, Luca!”

“Fine,” Luca pulled her from behind and held her. “I’m sorry.” He kisses her shoulder up to her neck. “I need you. It doesn’t feel right not having you here, MK.”

“You have far more important things than someone like me,” she says. “And you agree with that.” MK shivers, feeling the night cold and she hugs herself with her thin layered trenchcoat.

“You had nothin’ else to wear but that?” Luca’s eyes loomed over her outfit. “That’s not for winter.” He removed his long overcoat and wraps it around her. “You’re just as important as my work, and I didn’t take that seriously. I should of paid more attention.”

“You can’t just push me aside, Luca.” She turns around to face him. “Eventually, I’ll end up finding someone new, someone who won’t treat me like a second option.”

“I’d rather die.” Luca cupped her face. “I’ll do better, you hear me? God forbid if I ever neglect you again, I would never forgive myself.”

“Luca—”

“No. It’s hard to balance love and work, but I can’t just toss you away like that. You’re all the world to me.”

MK lookes down sadly. “Luca, I just know nothing will change. We’re so different.”

Luca shook his head. “That’s not gonna stop me.”

“But why?” MK asks. “There are women out there who would gladly take my place any day, and they’re ten times more experienced.”

“Sure, that may be true. But I can’t imagine spending my life with those women, sharing my home with them, waking up next to them, holding them, possibly having a future with them.” He lifts her chin. “Because I love you.” And he leans down, kissing her softly. MK wrapped her arms around him for support. He pressed his forehead on hers, his eyes still shut.

“I love you too, Luca.” The couple pulls away. “So, are we heading back inside?”

“Actually, there’s this restaurant I’ve been dying to take you to,” he smirks as he took her hand, and they began walking off down the streets of New York City, the lights blaring up on their bright faces like they were brand new.

_

tag list: @ladyxblake​ @lotsoffandomimagines​ @amirahiddleston​ @thethyri​ @woahitslucyylu​ @myriadimagines @obsessedunicorn24 @fangirlsarah16 @your-pixels-are-showing​

[and-then-there-were-n0ne]

I have been trying to write something about separatism almost since my first dawning of feminist consciousness, but it has always been for me somehow a mercurial topic which, when I tried to grasp it, would softly shatter into many other topics like sexuality, man-hating, so-called reverse discrimination, apocalyptic utopianism, and so on. What I have to share with you today is my latest attempt to get to the heart of the matter.

[…] The theme of separation, in its multitude variations, is there in everything from divorce to exclusive lesbian separatist communities, from shelters for battered women to witch covens, from women’s studies programs to women’s bars, from expansion of daycare to abortion on demand. The presence of this theme is vigorously obscured, trivialized, mystified and outright denied by many feminist apologists, who seem to find it embarrassing, while it is embraced, explored, expanded and ramified by most of the more inspiring theorists and activists. The theme of separation is noticeably absent or heavily qualified in most of the things I take to be personal solutions and band-aid projects, like legalization of prostitution, liberal marriage contracts, improvement of the treatment of rape victims and affirmative action. It is clear to me, in my own case at least, that the contrariety of assimilation and separation is one of the main things that guides or determines assessments of various theories, actions and practices as reformist or radical, as going to the root of the thing or being relatively superficial. So my topical question comes to this: What is it about separation, in any or all of its many forms and degrees, that makes it so basic and so sinister, so exciting and so repellent?

Feminist separation is, of course, separation of various sorts or modes from men and from institutions, relationships, roles and activities which are male-defined, male-dominated and operating for the benefit of males and the maintenance of male privilege–this separation being initiated or maintained, at will, by women. (Masculist separatism is the partial segregation of women from men and male domains at the will of men. This difference is crucial.)

The feminist separation can take many forms. Breaking up or avoiding close relationships or working relationships; forbidding someone to enter your house; excluding someone from your company, or from your meeting; withdrawal from participation in some activity or institution, or avoidance of participation; avoidance of communications and influence from certain quarters (not listening to music with sexist lyrics, not watching tv); withholding commitment or support; rejection of or rudeness toward obnoxious individuals. Some separations are subtle realignments of identification, priorities and commitments, or working with agendas which only incidently coincide with the agendas of the institution one works in. Ceasing to be loyal to something or someone is a separation; and ceasing to love.

[…] Most feminists, probably all, practice some separation from males and male-dominated institutions. A separatist practices separation consciously, systematically, and probably more generally than the others, and advocates thorough and “broadspectrum” separation as part of the conscious strategy of liberation. And, contrary to the image of the separatist as a cowardly escapist, hers is the life and program which inspires the greatest hostility, disparagement, insult and confrontation and generally she is the one against whom economic sanctions operate most conclusively. The penalty for refusing to work with or for men is usually starvation (or, at the very least, doing without medical insurance); and if one’s policy of noncooperation is more subtle, one’s livelihood is still constantly on the line, since one is not a loyal partisan, a proper member of the team, or what have you. The penalties for being a lesbian are ostracism, harassment and job insecurity or joblessness. The penalty for rejecting men’s sexual advances is often rape and, perhaps even more often, forfeit of such things as professional or job opportunities. And the separatist lives with the added burden of being assumed by many to be a morally depraved man-hating bigot. But there is a clue here: if you are doing something that is so strictly forbidden by the patriarchs, you must be doing something right.

There is an idea floating around in both feminist and antifeminist literature to the effect that females and males generally live in a relation of parasitism, a parasitism of the male on the female… that it is, generally speaking, the strength, energy, inspiration and nurturance of women that keeps men going, and not the strength, aggression, spirituality and hunting of men that keeps women going.

[…] The parasitism of males on females is, as I see it, demonstrated by the panic, rage and hysteria generated in so many of them by the thought of being abandoned by women. […] If it is true that a fundamental aspect of the relations between the sexes is male parasitism, it might help to explain why certain issues are particularly exciting to patriarchal loyalists. For instance, in view of the obvious advantages of easy abortion to population control, to control of welfare rolls, and to ensuring sexual availability of women to men, it is a little surprising that the loyalists are so adamant and riled up in their objection to it. But look.

The fetus lives parasitically. It is a distinct animal surviving off the life (the blood) of another animal creature. It is incapable of surviving on its own resources, of independent nutrition; incapable even of symbiosis. If it is true that males live parasitically upon females, it seems reasonable to suppose that many of them and those loyal to them are in some way sensitive to the parallelism between their situation and that of the fetus. They could easily identify with the fetus. The woman who is free to see the fetus as a parasite might be free to see the man as a parasite. The woman’s willingness to cut off the life line to one parasite suggests a willingness to cut off the life line to another parasite. The woman who is capable (legally, psychologically, physically) of decisively, self-interestedly, independently rejecting the one parasite, is capable of rejecting, with the same decisiveness and independence, the like burden of the other parasite. In the eyes of the other parasite, the image of the wholly self-determined abortion, involving not even a ritual submission to male veto power, is the mirror image of death.

[…] There are other reasons, of course, why patriarchal loyalists should be disturbed about abortion on demand; a major one being that it would be a significant form of female control of reproduction, and at least from certain angles it looks like the progress of patriarchy is the progress toward male control of reproduction, starting with possession of wives and continuing through the invention of obstetrics and the technology of extrauterine gestation. Giving up that control would be giving up patriarchy. But such an objection to abortion is too abstract, and requires too historical a vision, to generate the hysteria there is now in the reaction against abortion. The hysteria is, I think, to be accounted for more in terms of a much more immediate and personal presentiment of ejection by the woman-womb.

[…] Male parasitism means that males must have access to women; it is the Patriarchal Imperative. But feminist no-saying is more than a substantial removal (redirection, reallocation) of goods and services because Access is one of the faces of Power. Female denial of male access to females substantially cuts off a flow of benefits, but it has also the form and full portent of assumption of power.

Differences of power are always manifested in asymmetrical access. The President of the United States has access to almost everybody for almost anything he might want of them, and almost nobody has access to him. The super-rich have access to almost everybody; almost nobody has access to them. The resources of the employee are available to the boss as the resources of the boss are not to the employee. The parent has unconditional access to the child’s room; the child does not have similar access to the parent’s room. Students adjust to professors’ office hours; professors do not adjust to students’ conference hours. The child is required not to lie; the parent is free to close out the child with lies at her discretion. The slave is unconditionally accessible to the master. Total power is unconditional access; total powerlessness is being unconditionally accessible. The creation and manipulation of power is constituted of the manipulation and control of access.

All-woman groups, meetings, projects seem to be great things for causing controversy and confrontation. Many women are offended by them; many are afraid to be the one to announce the exclusion of men; it is seen as a device whose use needs much elaborate justification. I think this is because conscious and deliberate exclusion of men by women, from anything, is blatant insubordination, and generates in women fear of punishment and reprisal (fear which is often well-justified). Our own timidity and desire to avoid confrontations generally keep us from doing very much in the way of all-woman groups and meetings. But when we do, we invariably run into the male champion who challenges our right to do it. Only a small minority of men go crazy when an event is advertised to be for women only–just one man tried to crash our women-only Rape Speak-Out, and only a few hid under the auditorium seats to try to spy on a women-only meeting at a NOW convention in Philadelphia. But these few are onto something their less rabid compatriots are missing. The woman-only meeting is a fundamental challenge to the structure of power. It is always the privilege of the master to enter the slave’s hut. The slave who decides to exclude the master from her hut is declaring herself not a slave. The exclusion of men from the meeting not only deprives them of certain benefits (which they might survive without); it is a controlling of access, hence an assumption of power. It is not only mean, it is arrogant.

[…] When those who control access have made you totally accessible, your first act of taking control must be denying access, or must have denial of access as one of its aspects. This is not because you are charged up with (unfeminine or politically incorrect) negativity; it is because of the logic of the situation. When we start from a position of total accessibility there must be an aspect of no-saying (which is the beginning of control) in every effective act and strategy, the effective ones being precisely those which shift power, i.e., ones which involve manipulation and control of access.n.

[…] When our feminist acts or practices have an aspect of separation, we are assuming power by controlling access and simultaneously by undertaking definition.

[…] The powerful normally determine what is said and sayable. When the powerful label something or dub it or baptize it, the thing becomes what they call it. When the Secretary of Defense calls something a peace negotiation, for instance, then whatever it is that he called a peace negotiation is an instance of negotiating peace. If the activity in question is the working out of terms of a trade-off of nuclear reactors and territorial redistributions, complete with arrangements for the resulting refugees, that is peacemaking. People laud it, and the negotiators get Noble Piece Prizes for it. On the other hand, when I call a certain speech act a rape, my “calling” it does not make it so. At best, I have to explain and justify and make clear exactly what it is about this speech act which is assaultive in just what way, and then the others acquiesce in saying the act was like rape or could figuratively be called a rape. My counterassault will not be counted a simple case of self-defense. And what I called rejection of parasitism, they call the loss of the womanly virtues of compassion and “caring.” And generally, when renegade women call something one thing and patriarchal loyalists call it another, the loyalists get their way.

Women generally are not the people who do the defining, and we cannot from our isolation and powerlessness simply commence saying different things than others say and make it stick. There is a humpty-dumpty problem in that. But we are able to arrogate definition to ourselves when we repattern access. Assuming control of access, we draw new boundaries and create new roles and relationships. This, though it causes some strain, puzzlement and hostility, is to a fair extent within the scope of individuals and small gangs, as outright verbal redefinition is not, at least in the first instance.

[…] It is our experience in the movement generally that the defensiveness, nastiness, violence, hostility and irrationality of the reaction to feminism tends to correlate with the blatancy of the element of separation in the strategy or project which triggers the reaction. The separations involved in women leaving homes, marriages and boyfriends, separations from fetuses, and the separation of lesbianism are all pretty dramatic. That is, they are dramatic and blatant when perceived from within the framework provided by the patriarchal world view and male parasitism. Matters pertaining to marriage and divorce, lesbianism and abortion touch individual men (and their sympathizers) because they can feel the relevance of these to themselves–they can feel the threat that they might be the next. Hence, heterosexuality, marriage and motherhood, which are the institutions which most obviously and individually maintain female accessibility to males, form the core triad of antifeminist ideology; and all-woman spaces, all-woman organizations, all-woman meetings, all-woman classes, are outlawed, suppressed, harassed, ridiculed and punished.

To some of us these issues can seem almost foreign… strange ones to be occupying center stage. We are busily engaged in what seem to us our blatant insubordinations: living our own lives, taking care of ourselves and one another, doing our work, and in particular, telling it as we see it. Still, the original sin is the separation which these presuppose, and it is that, not our art or philosophy, not our speechmaking, nor our “sexual acts” (or abstinences), for which we will be persecuted, when worse comes to worst.

- Marilyn Frye, Some Reflections on Separatism and Power in The Politics of Reality: essays in feminist theory (1983, Crossing Press)

[buckysrighthanddoll]

Feel

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Enhanced!Reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, mentions of past trauma, flashbacks, PTSD, the reader is a dick

Relationships were important to you. You were the type of person who tried to be friends with everybody and make them feel welcomed. This was no different when you were introduced to the Avengers.

Steve was the first Avenger that you met. He would come into your smoothie shop nearly every day, and he just knew that you weren’t quite like the other baristas there. It took around a month for him to ask you about it, which shocked you. You had thought you were doing an amazing job of not being suspicious.

You told him that you had the powers of emotional manipulation and superstrength. It was a struggle for you, especially since you had no idea how to control it. Sometimes you would be so depressed that people around you would cry without reason, other times you felt such elation that it leaked into the store patrons. The strength was rather easy to control in comparison.

He invited you to get some lunch a couple of times a week after that. It was nothing romantic; he simply wanted to get to know you better. After three weeks of getting to know each other, he asked Tony to train and recruit you. He just knew that you would make a wonderful addition to the team and that you would be welcomed and bring light to the dark days that the team would often experience. Steve also thought that you could break Bucky out of his shell a bit, seeing as you went through childhood trauma and were a survivor.

Tony absolutely adored you. He admired your charisma and humor and bright smile, and he thought that with some training, you would be a perfect fit for the team. The others agreed, so you were quickly recruited and given a bedroom to stay in (money was very tight and you could barely afford both rent and a car payment most months).

You met Bucky Barnes in the gym. You worked out for fun because even though you had super strength, you had to keep those muscles strong. Tony wanted you to learn how to fight, so he asked Barnes to teach you (if you call begging and coaxing “asking”).

You weren’t intimidated in the slightest. He was tall, had a metal arm, and was built like a Greek god, but other than that, you knew the Bucky that Steve told you about, and if any of it was true, then James Buchanan Barnes was a giant teddy bear.

“(Y/N)!” Tony called as he walked into the gym with Bucky not too far behind him. You dropped the bar you were deadlifting that had 500 pounds on it and looked over to the two men. “He’s training you to fight. Have fun, don’t kill each other,” Tony said over his shoulder as he left.

“Let’s get started,” Bucky mumbled, going over to the mat. You skipped behind him, your mood unbelievably high. He turns to look at you, all sunshine and smiles, and his heart nearly drops. You are the most beautiful woman he has ever seen in his entire life. “You’re (Y/N) I hear? I’m--”

“James Buchanan Barnes, but you go by Bucky,” You say, smiling lightly. “Steve told me all about you.”

“Ditto,” He smiles. “Okay, so the first thing we’re going to do is have a small fight. I’ll go easy on you and give you pointers, okay?” You nod your head and get ready. It was times like these when you were grateful that your mom signed you up for self-defense classes when you were fifteen. You took them for three years until you were an adult and couldn’t afford to take them on your own. Bucky takes a fast swing at you, which you catch. You twist his arm and then use it as leverage to hop onto his shoulders. He slams back, nailing you to the ground with his head.

“Well, that wasn’t very nice,” You laughed as he got up, springing up. He swings again, this time you ducked down and kicked your leg to the side, knocking him off balance. He pushes you back, pinning you to the mat with your wrists by your head. “For an old man, you sure fight well.”

“Aren’t you scared in the slightest?” Bucky asked you.

You laugh, a sound that Bucky wants to hear again and again. “Oh, James, I’m not scared at all.”

“You’re not?” He asked in disbelief.

You shook your head. “Being scared is a weakness, and I am not weak,” You said, all smiles despite the intrusive memories. It reminded you of when you were a child before all of these powers had come into play. You used to be scared shitless every single day because your drunken father would beat you senseless. Your mother had taught you that being scared was not okay. It was kin to hope, and hope led to being disappointed, and there was nothing your mother hated more than disappointment.

Which was probably why you despised being called a disappointment--it reminded you of her.

You shook your head quickly, then you lifted your arms off of the ground. They moved easily despite him putting his all into keeping you on the mat. He looked at you in shock as you both stood up. “How did you--”

“Did Tony not tell you about me?” You asked, twisting your head to the side innocently. You were the picture of innocence until people got to know you.

“No, he just told me to come in here and train you.”

“Oh, well that’s a shame,” You said, frowning a little.

“I think we should call it now. You’ve got the basics of fighting down.”

You smiled and walked with him to the kitchen.

The two of you grew very close. You talked to him every single day, and you often spent until two in the morning in his bedroom. He was easy to talk to and he loved how inviting and kind you were. You sparred three days a week to get you ready to take on many opponents of his build, which were the majority of the enemies. Natasha trained you two days a week to get used to being more nimble, flexible, and unpredictable with your strikes. You soon became an amazing fighter who was both super strong and sly.

You and Bucky were in the tower’s cinema one late night, watching some 80’s movie that you had insisted on. You just got back from a rather rough mission in which you liberated multiple children from two abusers-- men that reminded you too much of your father. Once you were back on the quinjet, the entire mood was dark and sad despite the victory that you, Wanda, and Tony had. Your memories got the best of you, and suddenly you were sad and the emotion leaked into the others, and anybody who was near you.

Including Bucky.

He wiped a tear from his face subtly, trying not to let it show that he was crying. Your head rested on his shoulder, eyes shut as you listened to the surroundings. Half of the movie played with the two of you sitting in silence, but eventually, he couldn’t take being so sad. He excused himself, stepping out of the cinema and retreating to his bedroom. You sighed and turned off the movie, deciding to try to sleep.

The exhaustion from the mission did little to help your mind slip into unconsciousness, but it got there eventually with the help of medication.

You moped around the next day, as well. The PTSD flared through the entire day, making everybody around you uneasy. Normally, you were all sunshine and smiles, a walking lollipop, entirely too happy and optimistic. The team had never seen you so down or irritable.

“Could you hand me the butter knife?” You asked Natasha impatiently. When she didn’t react quick enough, likely due to her being in a conversation with Steve, you angrily stomped over and grabbed it yourself. You didn’t understand how you were being so grumpy right now, but you were.

You finished the sandwich and gripped it tightly as you walked back to your room, ignoring all of the glances the team was giving you. Training was in an hour, but you wanted to get to the gym as soon as possible.

“Hey, (Y/N)--”

“Not a good time, Barnes,” You said, slamming your door shut behind you. Bucky furrowed his eyebrows. Not once had you ever called him by his last name. You always called him Bucky, or sometimes James when you were being particularly silly, but never Barnes.

You scarfed down your food quicker than normal, changing into workout clothes and heading down to the gym. You swung and punched the bag until it split open down the center. And even then, you kept swinging.

“Take it easy there, girly,” Sam laughed, coming up behind the bag and holding on to it. You rolled your eyes and kept swinging, knocking the air out of him. “(Y/N), can you please talk to one of us? We’re worried.”

“Why? I’m perfectly fine,” you said irritably.

Sam rolled his eyes at you as he stepped in front of the bag, blocking you from swinging again. His tone gets serious as he gives you a soft look. “We know that you’re not. We just want to see you happy, that’s all.”

“Listen, Wilson, I’ll be fine.” The rest of the team streams in, eyeing you and Sam down cautiously. “Let’s just get this done and over with.”

You sparred Steve first. Taking him down was easy given today’s anger level. You pinned him down in two minutes flat, shocking even him.

Next was Sam. He was an easy fight since you had super strength and he didn’t have a fighting advantage. Thirty seconds was all it took.

Natasha and you fought next. She nearly got you, but you pulled one of her moves and pinned her beneath you, winning the match in a minute or so.

Bucky was last. All of your built-up anger was leaking into the rest of the team, but him more so. Bucky was always more sensitive to your emotions. He put up a hell of a fight and was currently winning. You had your thighs wrapped around his neck one second, and the next you were slammed against the mat with a hand around your throat. Before you could react, a flashback filled your mind.

All you could think of was your father. The man who tormented and abused you. The man who was supposed to love you unconditionally, but instead shattered everything that you were.

“Please don’t hurt me,” You softly cried out. Tears pooled to the surface, all of your anger subsiding as it was replaced with fear. You saw Bucky’s face shift into your father’s, and it petrified you. “Not again; it’s been years.”

Bucky caught on to what was going on. He knew PTSD very well, and he saw how you looked at him as if he were the most intimidating thing on this planet. It was like you were seeing a ghost.

He releases his hold around you, allowing you to sit up. “Take her back to her room,” Tony said, his eyebrows furrowed in worry. “Take care of her.”

Bucky didn’t have to be told twice as he picked you up. You were nearly frozen in shock, your eyes closed tight as you thought of some of the things that your father had done to you.

Getting up to your room, Bucky sets you on the bed. You willed yourself to open your eyes, looking at Bucky. His eyes were warm and kind and the opposite of the man you were just thinking about.

“Please, darlin’, talk to me,” Bucky said. “You haven’t been yourself.”

You let out a choked sob. “My father used to abuse me. Almost every single day. My mom was too scared to leave him, so she did nothing. We lived in constant fear of him coming home each day. And on the last mission, those men reminded me so much of him. I’ve tried being fearless, because being scared is weak, and I am not weak,” You gritted out. “And it normally works. But then shit like this happens and I’m sent right back to my childhood home and I get scared and I hate it and--”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Bucky said, reaching out and stroking your hair. “He isn’t here anymore. We’ve got you, okay? We’ll always have you.”

You nodded your head, taking some deep breaths in an attempt to contain your emotions. “I’m lucky to have you all.”

“We’re lucky to have you.”

“No, really. You guys are the family that I never had. And I’m so fucking thankful that I have you in my life. Buck, you mean everything to me.” He smiled lightly at the statement. “I don’t want to lose you.”

“You won’t, I promise.”

“Please don’t promise me anything,” You laughed drily. “There has never been a promise that has been kept in my life.”

“What if I promised to love you with every breath given to me?” Bucky asked quietly.

“What?” You asked in disbelief. You had fallen hard for the man in front of you, but you never wanted to push anything too far. It was shocking that he harbored any feelings for you at all.

“I mean it, (Y/N). I promise to make you feel cherished and loved, because you deserve it, because you are amazing in every way; because I’m falling for you.”

He leaned in slowly, glancing at your lips as he caressed your face. You melted into his touch, and when your lips met, you lost yourself entirely. There was no telling where you were, and that’s because mentally, you were sure that you had just transcended time and space. It was a small, lingering kiss, but it made you feel so intensely that Bucky could feel it, as well.

You broke away first, looking into his eyes as you processed what just happened. “Please tell me that was real,” You whispered.

“I promise you that it was,” Bucky laughed--music to your ears.

[choicessa]

Powerless (M!Kayden x MC)

Pairing: M!Kayden x MC

Book: The Royal Masquerade

Words: ~ 2800

Note: Sooooo... We all know what happened in the last chapter of TRM and I am pretty sure PB won't kill our MC because they are drama queens and just like to give us cliffhanger after cliffhanger... And since they refuse to kill our MC... Well... SOMEONE HAD TO. You can only blame my stupid, angsty brain for that idea, I don't even know where it came from but it just appeared and well, who am I to refuse the blessing of angst gods?

SO, this is pure angst, you have been warned and you're reading for your own risk.

WARNING!!! Blood, violence, character’s death.

All he could hear was her scream.

It wasn't a scream of pain, nor a scream of fear when with her eyes wide opened Rose looked down at the blade leaving her body. It was more a scream of surprise, full of utter shock when her eyes refused to believe what had just happened. She shouted in desperation, almost like hoping that her voice will stop the blade from delving into her body, almost like it could stop her biggest nightmare from happening.

But it was all for nothing.

Renza's blade struck her chest with a sickening sound and then left it, barely seconds ago, making a way for her fresh blood. And when she screamed, her voice mixed with his one, equally shocked and desperate, yet his was already full of terror and pain when he could helplessly watch a sharp blade disappearing inside the body of a woman he loved.  

Rose looked down at her wound and touched it with her hands, trying so hard to stop the bleeding with her trembling hands, pressing them to her sleeping gown, with every passing second turning red from the blood escaping her body. Sharp, ragged breaths were escaping her parted lips when he watched her chest helplessly, not knowing what else could she do. And then her eyes moved, to the side, her scared and hurt gaze finding the dark eyes of a man beside her.

"Kayden..." She whispered, her sight full of silent request, when she was begging him to do something, anything.

But he was like frozen.

His whole body felt like a block of ice when he moved his eyes from her wound to her face and then back to her wound.

There was nothing he could do...

He swallowed hard, thoughts in his mind racing when with his trembling hands he reached out to her.

"I'm here, Rose. I am here." He slipped his arms around her, gently, his presence being everything he had to offer.

''Kayden, I...''

''Shhh, that's okay, don't move. We have to... We have to stop the bleeding...''

''Kayden, it hurts...''

''I know, I know... Just let me...'' Without saying anything more he ripped the border of her sleeping gown and with trembling hands he pressed the fabric to her wound. ''Press it, we have to stop the bleeding...''

''Ohhh, look at that beautiful, touching scene. I almost want to cry.'' They heard Renza's voice and Kayden turned his head to look at her.

''You...'' His eyes narrowed dangerously.

''I what? Do you want to say something, oh powerful sorcerer? Something you want to add? Scare me a little? Threaten me?'' With her every word she was coming closer and closer, her words mocking his powerlessness, until she stood right in front of him, with a proud smirk on her face. ''Tell me, Crown Shield...'' Renza grabbed his chin and raised his face, so he had to look at her. ''What was that you wanted to say?''

Kayden clenched his jaw, so hard he could feel his teeth gritting against each other and his hands started to shake violently when he could just look in the eyes of this traitorous snake Renza was. He could still hear Rose's desperate gasps when she was trying to fight with her pain, when she was trying to take one more deep breath, when her body started to refuse her desperate asks of relief. If only he could, he would wrap his hands around Renza's neck, squeezing, harder and stronger, making her gasp for breaths. But he could still feel the assassin's blade at the base of his neck and no matter how much he would love to strangle the woman standing in front of him, he couldn't.

''That's what I thought.'' Renza let go of him, smiling sweetly.

''Should we kill him?'' He heard the assassin's voice.

''Kill him?'' Renza raised her brow with surprise, before looking back at Kayden. ''Oh, no! The fate I have prepared for him is much more fun!'' She grinned. ''Imagine this... Someone comes here, they find a dead body of a new queen, dagger laying on the floor, covered in her blood and Crown Shield, sorcerer, a traitor with her. The one who was recently accused of the same crimes but was magically pardoned by the King Regent. No signs of violence, no signs of entering... Only him and her dead body...'' She shook her head theatrically. ''My, my! What they will all think of it?''

''Hunter will never believe you! Nor Percival, not Annalisa, nor...''

''Oh, please!'' She rolled her eyes. ''They are nothing but mere paws! Do you think I care about their opinion? Do you think anyone would care? Trusting people who were so close to you? People who might have plotted with you? Choosing them? Over me? Daughter of a respected Lord from a famous noble family?'' Renza cocked her head to the side and snorted. ''And here I thought you were the smart one...''

''You won't get away with this, Renza! Do you hear me? You won't!''

''Really? Well... I think... I just did.'' She shrugged and threw her head back, laughing.

Her laugh resonated in his head, being like an annoying drill, the most repulsive sound filling him with hatred and annoyance, like nothing he had ever felt before. But at the same time, he could still hear Rose's gasps, her strangled voice repeating his name like a prayer and silent moans when with every breath she as hit with another wave of pain.

And then he felt something.

It started almost innocently, a strange warmth that appeared in his chest and started to spread across his body, slowly reaching every cell of his body.  That weird feeling, like a spasm in his stomach, which turned into something bigger, something more, the weird ignition of his body and emotions that came with it.

Rage.

It came as the first one, setting his whole body on fire, filling his veins with hatred, the biggest one he had ever felt in his life. They called him a killer, a traitor. They loathed him and despised him, pointing him like he was the worst criminal. When his only crime was fighting for this kingdom, fighting for the woman he loved. And now? Even she was being taken away from him, killed in an assassination he couldn't stop. But as soon as this rage appeared in him, he felt something else. Dozens of other feelings flooding him like a tidal wave hitting against the coast.  

Love.

He never thought he will love someone as much as he learned to love her. A fearless girl with red hair, red as a fire burning inside her. A girl who was the first person to notice him, truly notice him. Not as a Crown Shield, not as a bastard. But him. Real Kayden who was always there, under all those layers. And a girl who started to love him unconditionally, just when he thought nothing good will ever happen in his life anymore.

Despair.

The sight of her, laying in his arms, her hands shaking, her chest rising and falling with her rapid and uneven breaths, her eyes moving across the room restlessly and her face, marked with effort, with pain, when with every second she was losing more and more blood.

Fear.

Fear that there was nothing to be done. Fear that he failed, that when he just told her that he will always protect her, always will be by her side, always there to save her - he failed. And he failed when she needed him the most. It wasn't about securing the crown anymore, it wasn't about protecting her from hatred and plots. It was about her life. And although he already saved her few more times before – now the time has come when he failed.  

All those emotions, boiling in his veins when he could still hear Renza's laugh in his ears, he could still see her face, full of content and pride. And he knew.

He knew he had enough.

He couldn't say what was happening but at one point he was kneeling by Rose's side, a sad, defeated, broken man, with a dagger, pressed to his neck. And in the next second, he was blinded by rage, by love, by fear, by despair, all of them at once, his body trembling when this strange warmth he was feeling started to get even warmer, almost hot inside his chest. Lead by some unknown power he raised his head, his eyes dark, almost black when he laid his eyes upon Renza's figure, staying a few steps away from him. And as soon as she saw his gaze, the laughter died on her lips, corners of her mouth dropped down and in her eyes, Kayden finally saw something that he always craved to see.

Fear.

Like an animal trapped in a cage with no escape route.

And she knew.

"What..." She started to ask but never got a chance to finish her thought.

Because his power exploded.

He was never taught how to use his magic, never informed what to do to control it, or how to make it work. All of this, he had to learn by himself, spending long hours and learning how to trust his own body, trying and failing, over and over again until finally, his body started to listen, his mind became his ally and what at first had seemed like a dream finally became a reality. But the excitement he felt, when for the first time he had fully built an invisible barrier, quickly disappear when he understood the position he was in. He was a bastard, a nobody, and to all of this, he was also a sorcerer, a person everybody else hated and considered a villain. For years he had learned to hide his talent, to cover his true powers, revealing them only in the cases of the greatest danger. And even then he knew that the risk of being exposed was a thin line he could never cross. A thin, invisible line leading straight to his doom. But after years has passed, he learned how to adapt, how to be that pathetic bastard everyone expected him to be.  

Until he met her.

Rose awoke something inside him, those new feelings, new emotions, which in some strange way weakened him, at the same time strengthening. His heart might have been weaker, his body tempted by her closeness whenever she was close, but he had never felt more powerful, more capable than in those moments when he was having her by his side.

And now he was losing her.

His anchor, his heart, his love.

And he couldn't stand it anymore.

He couldn't even say what exactly was happening, but at this moment a wave of pure power surged through his body and left it in a wave of energy hitting everything around him in the room. He could feel every muscle and bone in his body on fire, every cell, every tissue feeling like being torn apart by this ancient force now consuming his whole body. He could barely see, his eyes darkened, wave of light spreading across the room making him see nothing but whiteness, almost blinding him and yet, all he could do was to keep his eyes open.

He could hear screams, assassin's, Renza's, when they could only stand in place, in pain, consumed by his power, by his magic, being torn apart into tiniest pieces. And he could hear his own scream, joining theirs, when in this one simplest action, the oldest human indication of being alive, he let go of all of it. All this anger, all his pain, all his suffering, leaving him, cleansing him.  

He couldn't say if it took seconds, minutes or hours, for him time has stopped, yet his body felt every passing moment of it as a new wave of pain. And just when he thought he won't be able to take any more of it, when he felt like on the edge of collapsing, when he could barely stand a single second more of it, it all stopped.

With a gasp he took a deep breath, blinking rapidly when his eyes started to get used to the dark room once again. It was almost like waking up from a dream, a nightmare when he was slowly recognizing his surroundings once again. He could see two bodies laying on the floor, bend in half, curled up as if they both tried to protect themselves from the power that hit them. But it was all in vain. It got them anyway. Kayden looked back from them and his eyes found Rose's pale face, her body still in his embrace, still breathing rapidly, the only person untouched by his power in the whole room.

"Kayden, what..." She tried to ask, her eyes widened, asking him silent questions, but he just shook his head.

"Shhh...'' He pulled her even closer to his body, in a protective gesture, yet still careful to not cause her even more pain. ''It was nothing... They're gone. We're okay. We're okay..." He repeated the last sentence almost like a prayer, almost like he believed that saying that out loud will stop her from leaving him. "We're okay..." His voice was barely a whisper when he touched her cheek and gently brushed her skin with his thumb, a caress full of love and tenderness, when he could just look at her face, helplessly watching her slipping away from him.

For a moment they stayed like this, him, gently rocking her in his embrace and her, shivering in his grip, yet trying to savor every single second of it, of his closeness, of his smell, his warmth... She swallowed hard, rapidly blinking away her tears that started to gather under her eyelids at the thought that it was last time he was holding her like that. That she will never feel his touch again.

"Kayden...'' She whispered. ''I need you... I need you to promise me something."

"Rose..."

"Promise me... Promise me you will take care... Of Annalisa..." It was clear that every word she said was causing her great pain, her every breath a struggle but she continued anyway, knowing that if she won't speak now, she will never get another chance.

"Rose..."

"They may... consider you a traitor... they may... hate you but... take care... of my family... For me..."

"You will take care of them, Rose. You will be there for them." He whispered, his voice cracking a little when even against himself he lied to her. After lying to her about having powers, he promised himself that he will never lie to her again, no matter what. And yet, he lied. He lied because he knew she won't be there.

''Kayden, please...''

''I...'' Words got stuck in his throat when their eyes met and he swallowed hard, nodding. ''Of course, I will take care of them...''

Rose smiled weakly, her gaze strangely serene when she kept on looking into his eyes, the only anchor she had, keeping her sane and making her forget about the pain, even if for just a moment. She reached out to him, her trembling hand placing on his cheek when with a tenderness she moved her gaze across his face, her thumb gently caressing his skin.

"You were the best thing that happened to me, Kayden Vescovi." She said, smiling. "And I love you. More than I ever loved anyone."

"And I love you, Rose." His voice was somewhere at the edge of whisper and sob when he desperately covered her palm with his, squeezing hard, almost like it could make her stay with him. "I... I won't be able to make it without you..."

"You will. You have... Teapot... And Sunshine... And Frisk... They're... They will take care of you. Your... Family..." Her voice was even weaker than before, barely a whisper and a chocking sound escaping her throat.

"But I don't want them. I want you..."

"You will... Have... Always..."

"Rose... Rose, please..."

One more look, another soft gaze when she swept her eyes over his face, another smile raising her lips when she shot him one last look, a face of a loved one giving her the peace she needed so much. Her mouth moved in an inaudible whisper, her lips repeating words of love, again and again, her eyelids fluttering like delicate wings of a most exotic bird when her gaze started to wander, unable to focus on one spot.

''Rose... My love...'' Kayden pressed a kiss to the top of her hand, squeezing it as tight as he could, his gaze desperately looking at her, almost like waiting for a miracle, the one that was never meant to come. ''Rose...'' He repeated once again.

Her palm squeezed his, one more time, one last effort he could find strength for.

And then her eyes closed.

And just like that...

She was gone. 

[wmua-amherst]

Album Review: Jaime by Brittany Howard

by Alex MacLean

It’s rare to hear a record so brimming with life and creative energy as this one, at least for me. The kind of work that reminds you of the power music can have; paradigm-shifting, life-sustaining stuff. If you've heard the Alabama Shakes, you've heard this artist’s voice and her songwriting, but Jaime, her first release under her own name, feels like something else entirely.  While the Shakes are firmly a guitar band devoted to rock music, Howard's approach is more varied on this one, with jazz and soul creating the backdrop for idiosyncratic arrangements that don’t really sound like much else now. It is an experimental, soul-searching album that is joyous, adventurous, tragic and romantic, concerned with mining the past for a blueprint on how to move forward and always do better. 

This unique and eclectic approach makes itself apparent from the first track, the funky and political “History Repeats.”  This track is followed by a pair of love songs, “He Loves Me,” and “Georgia.” The former is a stomping, swaggering gospel song devoted to God, the only man who loves Howard unconditionally even when she’s “smoking blunts...drinking too much,” and just doing what she wants. At first it seemed to be a romantic sentiment, but the song is intermittently interrupted by samples of a preacher’s impassioned sermon. The latter finds Howard expressing desire for a woman named Georgia to notice her. She wants so badly for her “to know what [she] means when [she] says hello.” It starts from a quiet place with stuttered hi-hats and Howard singing falsetto, but eventually the crush blooms, and the song blasts off from an organ break into a coda of laser-like sustained guitar. Other highlights include the stunning “13th Century Metal,” which rides a “Funky Drummer”-like groove and an ancient-sounding keyboard into oblivion as Howard repeats a number of powerful mantras: “We are all brothers and sisters,” “My spirit will never be stomped out,” “Give in to love.” The song swells and swerves in and out of dissonance, inviting choirs of saxophones and other voices to join in. 

The ninth track, “Goat Head,” brings the pace of the record to a halt, in the most stunning way. The song delves into Howard’s personal history and identity, detailing a hate crime her family experienced in her childhood, and the negative and inaccurate impressions foisted on her as the child of a black man and a white woman in small-town Alabama; choice line: “See I’m black, I’m not white / but I’m that, nah nah I’m this, right?” The song also strips back a lot of instrumentation and low end, opting for a minimal, airy trap-style beat with a chopped-up piano loop. This lets the lyrics, and Howard, speak for themselves without the possibility of her message being misconstrued. 

Jaime is so engaging because Howard is so confident as a songwriter and her band is so talented that she is able to essentially throw out the rulebook on making records. Not that there is one, but a lot of deviations from pop song form and production unequivocally make for a singular and more compelling pop record. Speaking of the band, Robert Glasper guests on keys and Nate Smith plays drums on most tracks here. Smith may not be a name you know, but it should be, because his performances on this album are the source of much of these songs’  power. The drum sound is heavily compressed and distorted in many songs, pushed to the foreground of the mix. This would seem like the “wrong” thing to do to a lot of mix engineers, if you’re trying to get a clean and clear drum sound, but it brings raw power and heft to Smith’s precise yet relaxed timekeeping; it makes the effortless cool of playing just behind the beat a key feature of these songs, just like J Dilla’s unquantized MPC drums were as they changed the face of music back in the 1990s. 

Jaime above all, rewards repeat listens. Every song has something ot offer; after many listens just sort of tuning out those that weren’t my favorite tracks, the magic of “Short and Sweet” became apparent, it does so much with just a sparse acoustic guitar instrumental and Howard’s impassioned vocals. It is definitely an album worth going back to if you missed it when it first came out.

Jaime is out now on ATO Records

[solartranslations]

VF Jolly Chapter 2: Compensation for Kindness

The heroine is perplexed by Jolly’s unexpected kindness. She then catches a glimpse of his past in a dream…

~*Flashback: Alchemy Room*~

Joshua: Jolly

Jolly: …You’re in my way, get out…

Joshua: Father told you, right…?

Jolly: About what?

Joshua: About Kiara. He keeps bothering me to introduce her to him

Jolly: If you get married, she’ll join our family. Obviously he would. Just do it already

Joshua: I’m…not going to take over the family

Jolly: …What?

Joshua: Kiara is a free woman. She can’t join our family…and she doesn’t want to

Jolly: Then do the right thing and break it off

Joshua: …I can’t do that…

Jolly: You really think you can just decide that?

Jolly: Joshua, you’re the son of Mondo, the Papa of Arcana Famiglia. You need to be more aware of that

Joshua: The Family has you. Kiara only has me

Jolly: You’re kidding…you’re seriously going to abandon your family for some random girl?

Joshua: I…want to do what I can for her

Joshua: Kiara melted the frozen heart I had from being raised here

Joshua: Now, I want to live for her…this is how I can do that

Jolly: ……

Joshua: I’m choosing her over this family

Jolly: …Well don’t go telling me that

Jolly: If you can just throw away your own good fortune that easily…then you are seriously spoiled

Jolly: There’s no way I can understand you

Jolly: …It’s just sheer madness

Joshua: Jolly, I know you feel indebt to father…but, Arcana Famiglia isn’t the only thing in this world

Jolly: Shut up. And what about it? I said I can’t understand it, but you’re still trying to force your opinion on me?

Joshua: ……

Jolly: …You’re interfering with my research, get out

Joshua: …It’s just my opinion, but you should really treasure the people who will stay beside you unconditionally

Jolly: ……

Joshua: …I truly hope the day comes when you feel the same as me

~*End Flashback*~

~*Scene: VF Cabin Deck 3*~

Felicita: *gets up*

Jolly: You’re awake…?

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems as usual

Person: I’m glad that she slept well. I envy how she’s able to relax

Place: We need to make our move

Daily: It’s a pain but we must

Felicita: ?

Jolly: You still seem half asleep…but, we have no time. Just fix your bedhead and listen

Jolly: I checked on the hallways, but didn’t see the skeletons we saw last night

Jolly: It seems that we will have to use our daylight hours on this ship efficiently

Felicita: !

Jolly: Do you understand what we should do now?

>Go to the captain’s cabin

(+30 Amore)

>Eat

(+10 Amore)

>Look for the others

(No Amore)

Jolly: Correct

Jolly: Then here’s an apple for breakfast

(*smirk) Jolly: Hm…I’ve tested it for poison already. You can eat it without worry

Jolly: *sigh*…Well that is necessary

Jolly: You have quite the mettle. I didn’t think you would think about food first in this situation

Felicita: *blush*

Jolly: *chuckle*…You have superb survival instincts. You should be proud

Jolly: Here. I’ve already eaten. I doubt that apple would be poisoned at least

Jolly: If you’re worried, I can feed you if you want?

Felicita: *bite*

Jolly: So obedient of you. How unfortunate

Jolly: Now…

(Skip the next dialogue choice box)

Jolly: That’s not what we should do…

Felicita: …

Jolly: The Family doesn’t need someone who can’t solve this situation on their own

Jolly: Our priority…is this

(Skip the next dialogue choice box)

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned ❤≪Jolly≫ Doesn’t seem interested ❤≪Jolly≫ Doesn’t seem interested

Person: Like feeding a pet

Person: Well done

Daily: It’s a pain but we must

Person: Is she just living on instinct?

Food: I didn’t think she would want food first…

Person: I can’t believe she doesn’t know our priority…

Daily: No matter

>An apple?

>Is it really okay…?

Jolly: They’re everywhere. Every room has them

Jolly: They’re placed so that the people on this ship can eat them right away, right?

Jolly: It’s clear that there is a strange person who loves apples on this ship

Felicita: …

Jolly: …Why are you looking at me?

Felicita: *bite*

Jolly: Now…

Jolly: Then, are you going to go on an empty stomach?

Felicita: …

Jolly: …This is the only thing we have right now

Jolly: I’ve already eaten. If you aren’t going to eat, then shall we get moving right away?

Felicita: *bite*

Jolly: Rejoice. It’s an unnaturally fresh apple

Jolly: Now…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems as usual ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be teasing

Food: They have high water content and nutritional value

Daily: She must have noticed

Place: There must be a reason that there are so many apples

Food: There must be a reason that there are so many apples

Person: How foolish

Daily: You can’t be a burden

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems as usual ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems as usual

Person: No more playing around

Daily: We need to make our move

Daily: It’s a pain but we must

Person: No more playing around

Daily: We need to make our move

Daily: It’s a pain but we must

Jolly: Look at this map

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems as usual

Daily: Enough messing around

Place: It’s a pain but we must. We need to be aware of the dangers

Jolly: It’s a pain, so I’ll explain it simply

Jolly: This is the room we are in now

Jolly: On this ship…”Vascello Fantasma”, there are at least three others aside from us

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Person: How did that alchemist know the location of the Tarocco?

Daily: I can’t believe there’s a tiger on this ship…

Place: This ship is full of curiosities

Felicita: Yeah

Jolly: The first is the alchemist who stole the Tarocco…a human

Jolly: Then…the tiger

Jolly: The last is some form of ghost

Jolly: There is something troubling me about our enemies

Jolly: Specifically about the alchemist I mentioned first

Jolly: We didn’t see him escape the mansion and yet…he is here

Felicita: …

Jolly: Well, the truth should reveal itself eventually. And I have a hypothesis

Jolly: Now…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated

Arcana: After securing Ojou-sama, next is the Tarocco

Person: …I’m being too polite

Daily: If she understands then she’ll be more mindful about taking care of herself

Jolly: I thought about it overnight, and we’ll head to the captain’s cabin first

Jolly: It is very likely that what we’re looking for is there

Jolly: What Mondo ordered us to prioritize was…

Jolly: Your life. And the Tarocco

Jolly: To me, the lives of the Major Arcana come after that

Felicita: *glare*

Jolly: Fel…you must be able to set your priorities

Jolly: If you don’t want to lose everything…

Felicita: …

(*reach) Jolly: …Let’s go

~*Scene: VF Deck*~

Jolly: So we made it here without encountering anyone, dead or alive…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Place: Does that mean the ghosts don’t appear during the day?

Place: It’s daytime and yet still quite foggy

Place: Strange…

Jolly: It’s not that big of a ship compared to the Family’s though

Jolly: There may be some sort of powerful force at work here…

Jolly: It may be the power of this fog. It seems to hamper your sense of direction

Jolly: It’s strange that we didn’t run even run into Dante or Liberta when they are so familiar with ships

Jolly: I observed the hallway for a while after you fell asleep, but I didn’t see any living humans pass by

Jolly: I wonder how they got on this ship, and how it is being sailed…

>Quit talking about scary things

(-10 Amore)

>Jolly…stop it

(No Amore)

Jolly: I don’t understand what you find so scary

Jolly: Taking action without analyzing the situation is much more frightening

Jolly: I thought you had matured a bit after the Duello but…it seems you haven’t changed at all

Jolly: …Huh…stop what?

Jolly: I was making sure to give an explanation so that you would understand…

Jolly: But if it’s unnecessary then I won’t waste my breath

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated

Daily: Such an unpleasant way of putting it

Place: I guess I didn’t need to be considerate regarding the situation

Person: Is she thinking about our priorities?

Daily: It seems my talk is unneeded

Person: Is she thinking about our priorities?

Place: I guess I didn’t need to be considerate regarding the situation

Jolly: ……Hmph

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be hiding something

Love: It’s like I’m her chaperone. How ridiculous

Place: This will be quick if our enemies are in the captain’s cabin

Place: I can’t believe we didn’t run into anyone

>…Jolly

(No Amore)

>……

(-10 Amore)

Jolly: …*sigh*…

Jolly: Hmph……

❤≪Jolly≫ Doesn’t seem interested ❤≪Jolly≫ Doesn’t seem interested

Daily: It’s a pain but we must

Link: This is why being with people is tiring

Daily: We’ll do what we must

Link: This is why being with people is tiring

Daily: How ridiculous

Daily: It’s a pain but we must

Felicita: …

(*step)

Jolly: …The captain’s cabin appears to be over there…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems as usual

Person: This will be quick if our enemies are in the captain’s cabin

Place: Does that mean the ghosts don’t appear during the day?

~*Scene: VF Captain’s Cabin*~

Joshua: You…look like someone I’ve met before…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems confused

Link: If you’re looking into my heart…then don’t get close to him

Person: I can’t believe it…

Jolly: That face…and the stigmata on your left wrist…

Jolly: ……I never thought you would be here……

Joshua: Oh…oh, I see. You’re someone I knew when I lived in Regalo…

Joshua: You’re…Jolly. It’s been a long time… I didn’t expect that you would come here

Joshua: Hello, Ojou-san

Felicita: !

Jolly: I’ll get to the point. What are you doing here?

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Person: I have a few guesses…

Person: It really is him

Arcana: Just as I thought…

???: I can’t see very well here

Joshua: I am…watching over things here. And wishing for everyone’s happiness…

Jolly: ……

Joshua: I have something important to me. But since I can’t remember what it is…it’s very painful

Joshua: Jolly, maybe you know what it is?

Jolly: There’s no way I’d know what you’re thinking

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated

Person: I have one idea…

Person: His memory is clouded and what he says doesn’t make sense

Arcana: Just as I thought…

???: I can’t see very well here

Jolly: Even if I did know, I’ve got no reason to tell you at this point

Jolly: Hmph……

>Stigmata…

(+10 Amore)

>You know him?

(No Amore)

Jolly: He’s the man who ran off while hosting the “Justice” Tarocco…

Jolly: He’s Mondo’s son. …Nobody thought he was still alive though

Felicita: !

Jolly: Hmph…doesn’t resemble him though…

Joshua: Yes. I grew up in Regalo…I also know of Arcana Famiglia

Felicita: !

Jolly: Shut up

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated

Link: It means you’re meeting your brother

Person: I’m interested to see how she’ll react

Arcana: Just as I thought…

???: I can’t see very well here

Link: He’s corporeal since he has a shadow…but, there’s too much we don’t know

Person: Ojou-sama, if you’re going to open your mouth then get him to say something useful

Arcana: …Where is the Tarocco

???: I can’t see very well here

Jolly: You don’t seem to be the Joshua I know though

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be hiding something

Person: I won’t talk about the two of you…

Daily: I’ll give it a try…

???: I can’t see very well here

Jolly: It seems your emotions are fading from being away from Regalo for so long…

Jolly: Is it because you died?

Joshua: The old…me…

Jolly: There aren’t many who knew that the Tarocco was in that room

Jolly: And even if someone did infiltrate the mansion for a few days, they wouldn’t be able to just make off with that box without prior knowledge

Joshua: That’s…correct

Jolly: Which means you’re the one who told him the Tarocco was in that room

Joshua: …Yes…

Jolly: So you’re not denying it. I won’t bother considering the circumstances. …Whatever excuse you try, your crime doesn’t change

❤≪Jolly≫ Tarocco

Pain: “Arcana Famiglia isn’t the only thing in this world”…huh. Well look where that got you

Arcana: So he did have him steal the Tarocco

Person: But…

Jolly: Hmph…I only feel scorn for you now

Jolly: You left the Family and lived selfishly…you’ve gone to new lows as someone who cares nothing for the Family

Joshua: ……

Jolly: For what reason did you steal the Tarocco

Jolly: I can’t think of any reason why you would need it now

Joshua: I’m not…the one who needs the Tarocco…Ash does, and so does this ship

Jolly: …Ash?

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be plotting

Person: The alchemist in Luca’s report

Arcana: How are the Tarocco and this ship related…

Joshua: Ash is the protector of this ship…and the rightful owner of the Tarocco

Jolly: “Rightful owner”…? On what basis?

Jolly: The Tarocco belongs to Arcana Famiglia

Joshua: The Tarocco and this ship were created by the same alchemist. His name is Vir Ingeniosus

Joshua: Ash is his decedent. And by inheriting this ship, he has the right to possess the Tarocco

Jolly: It seems as though I do have to consider you an enemy

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be plotting

Arcana: So he’s an alchemist descended from the creator of the Tarocco

Link: That means he’s an enemy of the Family

Person: I don’t understand…

Joshua: I’m not your enemy. I’m thinking of Arcana Famiglia and my family too

Jolly: …Enough talk. There’s no point. I’m here for the Tarocco. Hand it over

Joshua: I can’t give you the Tarocco. It belongs to Ash now

Jolly: So you’re willing to fight for it…Are you this Ash’s servant now or something?

Joshua: Yes. You could say…that…

Joshua: …Ugh…guh…

Jolly: ……

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Person: That’s strange…

Arcana: There are still many mysteries about the Tarocco…

Daily: Stay back, Ojou-sama

>Joshua, take my hand…

(-10 Amore)

>Um…are you okay?

(No Amore)

Felicita: *step*

Jolly: That isn’t necessary!

Felicita: !?

Joshua: …Ah…the “Wheel of Fortune”…

Felicita: ?

Jolly: Get back

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated

Love: She never thinks…

Person: Offering him a hand is completely insane

Arcana: There are still many mysteries about the Tarocco…

Person: I can’t believe she’d head right into danger

Love: She never thinks…

Arcana: There are still many mysteries about the Tarocco…

(*stagger)

(*grab)

Joshua: “Ruotta della Fortuna”…can you use the power of the “Wheel of Fortune”?

Jolly: …Don’t get close to him

(*step) Joshua: …Jolly…

Joshua: Guh…it…hurts…

Joshua: Gyaaah…!!!!

Jolly: …I see. That lack of patience isn’t Joshua

(*crackle)

Jolly: You may be Mondo’s son, but you are still our enemy

(*glare) Jolly: Even if I did once know you, I’ll show no mercy

(*flash)

Joshua: My name is “La Giustizia”

Jolly: What…?

Jolly: So the Tarocco took possession over his consciousness…. How very interesting

(*shing)

(*dodge) Jolly: …

(*whish) Joshua: Hah…!!

Jolly: Guh…

>Watch out!

(+20 Amore)

>Jolly!!

(+10 Amore)

>Now isn’t the time to theorize!

(No Amore)

Jolly: Felicita…

Jolly: …I’ll thank you later

Jolly: Hm…it feels so long since I’ve seen you do something useful

(Skip the next dialogue choice box)

Jolly: …So you’ll protect me without being asked. Not bad I guess

(Skip the next dialogue choice box)

>Jolly…you don’t have a sword or knives so!

(No Amore)

>It’s because I want to protect you too, Jolly…!

(+30 Amore)

Jolly: …Good timing

Jolly: If you’ll be my shield, there’s more I can do

Jolly: Hmph…thanks for that…

Jolly: Protect me then

Felicita: …

(*clang) Joshua: …!!

(*crackle) Jolly: …How unfortunate

Jolly: Sink, into the inky darkness ––

Jolly: Tenebra mundus (TN: Dark world)

(*crash)

Felicita: !?

Jolly: ! …Felicita!

❤≪Jolly≫ Tarocco

Pain: What caused Justice to take over Joshua?

Place: The tiger that came to the mansion

Link: Justice…does that mean the Tarocco know who they are each hosted in…?

Jolly: We’re retreating, come on

~*Scene: VF Deck*~

~*Scene: VF Hallway*~

Jolly: *sigh*…

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems concerned

Daily: I’m tired

Place: I’ll do some investigation…

Love: This isn’t the time to be concerned about that

Jolly: The sun will set soon. Then the ghosts you’re so scared of will come out

Jolly: It’s not a good idea for us to move around at this hour. We’ll find a room

>Don’t talk about scary things

(-10 Amore)

>…Am I just a convenient tool for you to protect yourself with?

(+5 Amore)

Jolly: Hmph…I don’t remember talking about anything “scary”. I’m just telling you the facts

Jolly: There’s no point in me teasing you right now

Jolly: *sigh*…Are you too stupid to trust in my kindness?

Jolly: Even if you are skilled, you can’t use those knives you’re so proud of if you can’t stand the sound of clacking bones, right?

❤≪Jolly≫ Seems to be mocking ❤≪Jolly≫ Seems irritated

Love: Don’t make me stop being considerate

Daily: I’ll do some investigation…

Daily: I’ll do some investigation…

Love: You should understand your own value the best

(*creak creak)

Felicita: !

Jolly: If you understand, then get inside now

~*End of Scene*~

Special Voice obtained. It can be heard in the Profile section

(Continue to Jolly Chapter 3)

(Back to Directory)

[silverlightqueen]

Daisies

here's another playlist with all the songs that the songs in Daisies are based on with the spotify playlist, enjoy x

a/n: almost all of the song titles come from part names of daisies parts lol and I also wrote this super late last night but the wifi stopped working as I tried to upload it so sorry for how... sleep deprived I come across in this lmaooo x

tracklist

1. Intro: Spring - KTH = Winter Bear - V

From the very first mixtape skit, Tae suggested having Intro: Spring and Outro: Summer so y’all know I had to call the intro Intro: Spring lol. I based this one off Winter Bear bc even though Winter Bear is about... a winter bear (lmao), I thought it’d be cute to have the message of this song as even though it’s spring, the singer still loves the person they fell in love with during the winter (and winter doesn’t necessarily refer to the season, but maybe a dark time in the singer’s life).

2. Mayday - KTH & JJK = Lay Me Down - Sam Smith & John Legend

So the reason I chose this song is that it’s quite a sad and dark love song and rather than seeing it as an unrequited love song (which is what it is), I see it as more a doomed love song. From the point of view of the singer, they see the relationship as something amazing and beautiful and something they want, but there are doubts/barriers in the way. This could be reflective of how both Tae and JK initially saw their relationships with Chae and Lisa due to the whole idol dating thing, or maybe even their past with sleeping around. 

3. Injustice - Jisoo & Jennie = Extraordinary - Clean Bandit & Sharna Bass

Again, this is another song about loving someone, but there are issues/doubts/barriers in the relationship. This again could be reflective of doubts that Jisoo and Jennie both had about Jin and Joon at the beginning of their attractions to one another/relationships. 

4. Psychic - KNJ & Jennie = Fine Line - Mabel & Not3s

This song is all about how they both have feelings for each other, but he’s more open about his towards her. Jennie is reluctant but feels like there is a very fine line (ba dum tsh) between their relationship being casual and her falling head over heels for him.

5. Missing Out - MYG, JHS & Lisa = Take It Or Leave It - Rae Sremmurd

Now I really really love this song bc it gives me major ‘I really like you and i’m trying my best to act like I don’t really care whether you like me or not but I really do and I’m not a good actor so you already know’ vibes. It’s a real laidback and chill ‘end-of-the-night-when-everyone’s-high’ kinda song and I love it.

6. Outings - MYG, JHS, PJM & JJK = New Flame - Chris Brown, Usher & Rick Ross

I chose this song bc it talks about finding love in an unlikely place; the club. In Outings, the boys sing/rap about finding love in a different unlikely place; on tour. It’s so hectic and busy that you wouldn’t think there’d be any time, but it happened regardless.

7. Possessed - JHS, Jennie & y/n = All My Friends - Snakehips, Tinashe & Chance The Rapper

This song is the ultimate introvert anthem and talks about the idol lifestyle for idols that don’t like the idol lifestyle. y/n wasn’t into all that getting high and drunk and sleeping around kinda thing and this song reflects that mentality, and the mentality of the boys when they used to do that shit.

8. Parents - KSJ, Jisoo & JJK = Boyfriend - Ariana Grande & Social House

This song just talks about how Jin, JK and Jisoo (and Lisa) are in relationships where they really like the other person and they don’t want them with anybody else, but they’re also not quite ready to commit and put a label on it or make it official just yet.

9. Booking Flights - KSJ, JHS, Jisoo, KNJ & Jennie = Finders Keepers - Mabel & Kojo Funds

This song is about how you will not catch Jin, Jisoo, Joon or Jennie booking a flight to see the other person they’re in a relationship with; they’re not ready for that yet and they’d prefer to keep it casual and make the most of the time they do have together before becoming serious.

9.5. Skit: Brainstorm Pt. IIIII - All

This is literally just them lot brainstorming and i’m so sorry but I am too tired to come up with what they say so you can just make it up yourselves

10. Really - Girls (Blackpink Cover)

This song is a little bit of turning point; it’s where the girls have decided that ‘okay, I like you and I’m ready for us to be something more; if you feel the same way, let me know’. This is where the girls are addressing their feelings and wanting the same from the boys.

11. Reunion - PJM & y/n = Learn To Love Again - Lawson

This song is y/n and Jimin talking about how they know that they are meant for each other bc of the fact that they’ve been able to learn to love each other again and forgive each other, despite everything that happened between them; it’s an admittance of how deep their feelings for each other really go.

12. Enjoy - Lisa & JJK = Fetish - Selena Gomez & Gucci Mane 

This song is about how JK and Lisa are feeling each other in a sexual way and no matter how they’ve tried to repress their feelings, they want the other; not just in a sexual relationship but in an actual relationship too (and they’re both aware of the other’s feelings). It also talks about how they don’t blame the other for liking them so a lil bit of self love in there too.

13. Blushing - Chae = Lover - Taylor Swift

There’s not much to say about this one; it’s literally just Chae admitting to Tae that she really likes him, wants to go where he goes and stay this close to him forever. It’s a really cute lil love song and I think it suits Chae and Tae’s relationship perfectly.

14. Clouds - MYG & KTH = Waves - Kanye West & Chris Brown

This song is about all the different relationships that the twelve of them have, discussing the fact that they are like waves; they change and move and (as Genius lyrics says) flux and reflux, but they never truly die and are always still there. Basically it’s about how no matter what happens, their relationships will exist and stay just as strong forever.

15. Close Your Eyes - Boys = Wake Up - The Vamps

This song is the boys admittance of their feelings for the girls and how they’re here and ready for the girls whenever their hearts are ready. That’s it, lol.

16. Babie - KSJ = This Is What You Came For - Calvin Harris & Rihanna

This song is about a really powerful woman who can command the entire room, but the feeling of her having her eyes on you. Basically, it’s just the boys empowering the girls; it’s them saying ‘you guys are really amazing and powerful and we’re honoured to even know you, let alone have your love’.

17.  Forever Young - All (Blackpink Cover)

This song is literally just them talking about feeling young when they’re all together and they’ll be together the rest of their lives, making them young forever.

18. About Time - MYG, JHS & y/n = Congratulations - Post Malone & Quavo

This is just a flex bc they're record breakers and award winners bitch lmao

19. Interlude: Hedge - JJK & y/n

y’all know I had to fucking do it to you !! okay so the backing track is literally just basic asf and it’s just JK and y/n rapping the following lines together (it’s only like a minute long lmao):

sitting on a ledge, thinking ‘bout a hedge. we gon’ make a pledge to grow ourselves a hedge. our tools we will dredge (up) and in the garden we will wedge, some seeds between our flowers and grow a baby hedge. the baby hedge will grow, ‘til it can’t no mo’, ‘til it’s bigger than Tae’s toe and taller than Joon’s old ‘fro. our hedge matters most, it’ll grow from coast to coast, ‘til the world from edge to edge will fall in love with our hedge 

(that’s it. I have reached the peak of crackheadedness. I will never do anything more crackhead-like than what i am doing right this second; writing a rap about a hedge at 1am in the dark with Monsters vs Aliens on the tv)

20. Apocalypse - KTH, Lisa & y/n = This Is Love - Will Smith & Eva Simons

This song is legit just how much love they all have; for each other, for their fans, for their families and friends and for their music. That’s it, ion know what else to say.

21. Lucky Stars - Chae & y/n = Unconditionally - Katy Perry

This is just another big love song about how no matter what, they will all still love each other unconditionally, without holding back anything.

22. Masterpiece - PJM & y/n = Ordinary People - John Legend

This is y/n and Jimin realising that there will be ups and downs in their relationship, but that’s okay bc that’s life and they’ll get through it bc they love each other. It’s also them realising that they need to just go slow this time and let things happen naturally rather than rushing into anything and forcing anything.

23. Tipsy - PJM & y/n = Drunk In Love - Beyonce & Jay-Z

Nothing has changed; they both still like sex a lot. Also, rapper!Jimin which we love (yes, i’m still not over that Tony Montana performance and I want it tattooed on my forehead pls)

24. Whiplash - Boys = Better Man - 5 Seconds Of Summer

This song is dedicated from the boys to y/n bc she made them better men; she threw away their drugs (lmao) and got them to stop sleeping around and helped to realise their worth and love themselves, so this is their thank you to her for changing them into better people.

25. Holiday - Chae, JJK & y/n = Malibu - Miley Cyrus

This song is about how they were reluctant about relationships at first and never saw themselves where they are now, but they love it and feel indebted to their other halves (and also their friendship group) for giving them new experiences, changing their lives for the better and making them happier than ever.

26. Promise Pt. II - PJM = Serendipity - BTS

This is dedicated to y/n (obviously) and is basically just Jimin’s promise to y/n that he loves her.

27. Angel Boy - y/n = Video Games - Lana Del Rey

This is y/n’s love song to Jimin - just listen to it and you’ll understand (listen, it’s late and i’m tired but I just wanna get this uploaded so I can finish daisies in the next couple of days and start the new au so sorry if the descriptions are too brief lol)

28. Back On - All = All Weekend Long - Jack & Jack

RTG might have left the toxic lifestyle behind them but they’ll never say no to a good party lmao

29. Business - KNJ & Jennie = Touch - Little Mix & Kid Ink

Jen and Joon like each other a lot and like to touch too lmao i’m tired forgive me

30. Peachy - KSJ & Jisoo = Toothbrush - DNCE

Jin and Jisoo not wanting just one night stands and asking the other to stay the night and the next day bc they like each other a lot

31. Dream - Lisa & JJK = Cold Water - Major Lazer, Justin Bieber and MØ 

This just in: JK and Lisa really like each other and will save each other from cold cold water bc of it.

32. Worldwide - KTH & Chae = This One’s For You - David Guetta & Zara Larsson

Just a super feelgood, uplifting and empowering love song that’s totally not about football.

33. Daisy - PJM & y/n = Middle - DJ Snake & Bipolar Sunshine

This song is where I got the line ‘staring at two different views’ from and both y/n and Jimin have captioned pictures of each other with that line so I felt obliged to have this as their song, and then I called it daisy and made myself sad lmao.

34. Goodbye - All = The Time - Black Eyed Peas

They had the time of their lives on The Rose Tour and can’t wait to do it all over again on The Daisies Tour.

35. Outro: Summer - All = Waiting For Love - Avicii

They’ve all been hurt in the past but that doesn’t matter anymore bc they’ve found love in each other and that’s all that matters. 

taglist💕: @khaoticamour @rjsmochii @minniestudies @oodlespadoodle @shay-the-turtle @yasbts705 @goldenchemistry @arvbellas @anothershorthuman @golden-pixie-dust-200 @onlinewhale @maknaeroni @sweetchocolategoblin @conslack @missbowkimjinju @pocketfullofsuga @booklover240 @dimple-jungkook @squishyshit @sakurauchiha2018 @keylowmonie @untainted-memories @babybluebisexual @dearbangtan07 @joyful-jimin @glossdust @mayumioutloud @needyvmin @the-real96 @brinnalaine @lovebuginlove @smolchild95 @miraisnotavailable @eilowyneleyne @kiddrauhlfeels @silverlightprincess

[mininky]

Heavy Lies the Crown-7

Summary: (Y/N) has the fate of her people on her shoulders and according to a seer, the only way to save her kingdom from the bloodthirsty wolves is by giving herself to the god of the hunt.

Pairing: werewolf!Namjoon x reader

Warnings: dark humor sprinkled in there, some more daddy issues. A whole lot of dialogue. Honestly, it’s almost all dialogue.

word count: 5.1K

Prologue Chapter one two three four five six seven eight

   The room felt cold in its tense silence, the atmosphere hanging in a state of near suffocation as you stared at Melinda with obvious animosity. None of this affected her. Not in the way it did you. Clawing at you. Anxiety bubbling. Anger rippling in red hot flashes, threatening to tumble you over the edge. Silence. Silence was all that greeted you other than her giddy smirk. You're not sure how long all of you sat like this after the other boys had made an exit (by near force, it wasn't what they wanted to do that was for certain.) It might have been just a few seconds, but it certainly felt longer. Namjoon was next to you in an equal state of agitation, Melinda across the table seemed to be relishing in the havoc she had reeked without saying anything.    "You said you have much to speak about. Now speak." Your voice came out in a near growl, nerves on edge as you willed yourself to stay in your seat. You're not sure why you were so put off by her. Perhaps it had been the flurry of Namjoon's emotions that put you in this state to begin with. Perhaps it had just been the syrupy sweet voice and mocking twist in her berry bitten red lips. Perhaps it had been a combination of both, brewing and festering in you until it reached a near barbaric state.    "My my so impatient. I guess I shouldn't expect anything less from you though. You've always been that way." She shined her perfectly shaped nails on her shirt as she spoke, not even batting an eyelash at your terse words. You opened your mouth to respond but she quickly cut you off. "I'm not here to fight. In fact, I'm here for anything but that. So please, don't be so riled up."    Namjoon gave a grunt of annoyance and you fought off the smile that threatened. At least he felt the same as you did about this situation. "What are you here for then Melinda?" You speak through gritted teeth as your gaze bore holes into her stupidly perfect face. Gods, you don't know why you hate her so much right now but you do. It's not fair really, she hasn't even done anything. Yet. There's the problem. You're waiting for the shoe to drop.    She gives a pretty little bat of her eyes at you before a hearty laugh rips out of her. "I always loved your spunk. No beating around the bushes. No lying. Just blunt honesty from you."    "We've met twice."    "Oh! Well, see that's where you're wrong. I have been by your side in various disguises throughout your life. As your nanny, as a maid, as a fellow soldier even." Her cheshire grin grows larger at the look of confusion on your face and she basks in that for another beat before continuing on. "You see I have watched over you for a simple reason. Have you never questioned the distance from your father?"    "He's rather distant from everyone, even my mother."    "True. Although he's always had a bit more of a temper with you. Have you never wondered why?"    "I'm not at all what he wanted me to be. We both know I make a terrible princess."    "That's not true, you make a terrific princess he's just too much of a sexist, elitist, entitled prick to realize that." Namjoon's candid sentiment has you stop breathing for a moment, losing your thoughts in how he immediately stands up for you before Melinda's voice shatters the moment.    "Well, Joonie is right." You feel your fingers twitch at the nickname but refuse to admit it. "Yes, your father is all those things but really his problem with you has been even deeper than that. You aren't his child, at least not by blood."    Something deep inside you snaps. The lost little girl in you breaks like a twig leaving your soul shaking and fists clenching. You had always heard rumors but had tucked all the terrible things in a heavily locked box dark in the recesses of your mind only to be opened at the worst of times. Your sight swivels onto Namjoon as you feel his hand soothing cup your jaw and you force yourself to harden your emotions. Melinda's voice comes out softer this time, and you feel bitterness threaten to break you at the pity she shows. "I know you've always wondered, I know you've questioned this before."    "And why again are you here Melinda? If not to trample on my emotions for personal gain or just for the fun of it? I see none of this as being important to me, it makes no difference in who I am or who I have become." You strike back with venom dripping from your words, bitterness seeping out and threatening to break you in half.    Melinda sighs, recoiling slightly at your snappy remark. "That's not why I'm here or why I'm saying this, but you need to know. I'm here because your father, your blood father, was a strong wizard. I know that this is sudden but please hear me out. You are of age now, your abilities are growing and soon the seal placed on you before birth will break completely and if you don't learn how to control your powers things might become dangerous. I'm here to ask you to come with me, to start your training."    "No."    "Please, (Y/N), you haven't even thought about it yet." You give a dry laugh at the state she's in now. Ringing her pretty little hands, face drenched in a scowl.    "And what, you'll take me to my blood father who's never even seen me? You'll take me to other witches on a whim? I've never had any supernatural abilities. I've never had powers. You've got the wrong girl, sorry."    "That's just not true! I've been with you for longer than you know, I have seen what you can do. Do you not realize that you have the ability to change hearts, to change the atmosphere around you? Have you never noticed how fast you learned to be a healer, how you surpassed your teachers so quickly? You must heed my warning, others also know and they will come to you for personal gain. You were prophecied about. A great witch born of a human woman and the strongest wizard who would be wed to a strong werewolf."    A bitter scoff leaves your lips as you roll your eyes at her. "Change hearts? I have lived my life under the tyranny of my father. If I could change hearts would I not have somehow made him love me unconditionally?"    "That is only partially true. You, unlike any other princess, have fought. You have been allowed into the ranks of soldiers who have detested the thought yet they never even argued at your skill when they would have any other woman. The fact that there was no argument from an entire kingdom when you told them all to change should be proof enough for you. Did you never question why it was so easy? At the very least did you never question why you haven't had any signs of changing into a werewolf when you have been marked? It's because you are already partially supernatural and because you're protected. Your father laid a seal of protection over you before birth. He knew as I knew that you would meet Namjoon. Stop being so stubborn and just think about this for more than two seconds!"    You can feel something bubbling inside you, more of that same feeling of loathing. It's directed at Melinda, but you know at this point that it's rather unjustified and yet you can't find it in you to care. You want to scream. You want to run. You want to go back to bed with Namjoon and pretend that the strangest part of your life was just werewolves. Not witches. Not your mountain of daddy issues to the man who raised you who wasn't your father. The dam bursts at that, tears spilling out of you at the realization that you were right all along. Your father never wanted you because you were never his. A princess to a kingdom that was only yours because he hadn't banished you. A kingdom that had only listened to you by magic, but then your thoughts work slowly as if stuck in mud. Magic. Changing hearts. You dry your eyes and turn away from Namjoon who had embraced you (you don't exactly remember when that happened or even feeling his warmth on yours.) "Wait, if I have the ability to basically bend people's thoughts to my own, or change hearts as you put it, then am I...am I bending Namjoon's? Did I force the pack to agree with me?" A monster, you feel like a complete monster. You might not have known but it doesn't make the damage any better.    "No, no not at all actually. Other supernatural creatures are far harder to put magic on, it takes extreme concentration and lots of skill. Anything you've used before has been a fluke. That was all just your own passion, your own very human very stubborn convictions that they made their own agreeance with." Melinda shakes her head adamantly and you strangely feel a rush of reassurance at that. You still don't trust her, but you trust that she is at the very least honest. It's something in the way she speaks to you now. There's been no more playfulness in her, any signs of giddiness has long gone out the window. Her eyes have stopped being so cute and coy and now they're blazing with an intensity that begs you to believe her. And you do. You realize that she's right. Even if it hurts.    "I still won't go with you." Melinda hangs her head and you can feel Namjoon's emotions burst with elation at your statement. You cast a small smile in his direction before turning back to Melinda. "However, I need to know more about the dangers that you speak of. We may be able to reach an agreement, but I will not leave this pack."    "Even if you're placing everyone in danger? Others will come for you. Magick hunters and stealers will want your power, other supernatural creatures might even try as well."    "We may be in danger even if she leaves. If it's true, and other supernatural creatures are interested in her and know that she's here then they will come here even if she's left. They won't know that she's not here. If they do know that she's left she will be in danger at your coven. Really, if you're correct in your assumptions then her safest place is by my side." Namjoon leans over the table, his conviction unwavering as he stares at Melinda. She glowers back at him, her eyes narrowing on the two of you.    "You don't understand, she needs to learn."    "I'm really not interested in magic."    She gives a mangled noise of exasperation. "You might think that now, but now that you are around other supernatural creatures your powers that have been stunted by force in the kingdom will grow and they might just harm people accidentally. We still don't even know what all you're capable of, and that is especially dangerous. You might be a fire starter, you might be a snake charmer, you might be a million different things and it could end in disaster if you don't learn how to control it."    Your brain tries to process this all but you keep coming up short. Somehow wrapping your mind around werewolves and their rather complex society hadn't been difficult (perhaps because you'd witnessed it first hand and had so much else on your mind at the time) in comparison to you possibly being able to catch things on fire. "When you say my powers were purposefully stunted what do you mean?"    Melinda rolls her neck with a loud crack before she leans in closer to you. "This is going to be a very long tale. I need you to listen closely, I don't want to repeat myself." You fight rolling your eyes at her and give her a stiff nod to continue. "Your mother was and still is in love with the King, but I think we can both agree that he isn't an easy man to love. He is rather silent, abrasive, and sticks far too much to the rules but most of all he loves having his ego stroked and refuses to do it for others. After an unfortunate miscarriage, your mother found no comfort in the King but she did find herself finding comfort from one of the royal advisors who also happened to secretly be a very powerful wizard. Your mother had no clue about this, not even after you were born and I highly doubt she knows even now that he was a wizard and that you are a half witch. The King knew that it couldn't be his child, he hadn't laid with her in months. The King had one of the royal advisors investigate, but before anything could happen, Merlin, just disappeared."    Namjoon stills at the name. "You've got to be kidding me. Merlin is her father? The first wizard? The greatest wizard? Melinda...if this is just some strange story to get us to listen to you..."    "Why as a witch would I ever desecrate Merlin's name? Trust me, I would never admit to him working under the King if it wasn't true. Honestly, the fact that he ever worked for that letcher even if it was to secretly enchant the kingdom for the safety of all magicks it is still something we all like to pretend never happened and it's an unspoken code to never bring it up especially to non-magicks." She gives a pointed look at Namjoon and lets the weight of her words hang for a second. None of it really seems to matter to you, you've never heard of this Merlin person and really considering that he just up and left your mother while she was pregnant with you just makes you resent him. Great, now you had two different dads and issues with both. Just fantastic. As if you didn't already have enough daddy issues now it's doubled in just one minute. "As I was saying...Merlin disappeared from the Kingdom, apparently, he left for another one shortly after. But not before ensuring your safety princess." You scoff slightly, great a deadbeat dad who cared enough to give a parting gift. Melinda ignores your disdain completely.    "He made sure to seal your powers, only to be awakened at a time of either great needs or by a ceremony. He also made sure to give you protection, he apparently understood the prophecy and has protected you from turning. Unfortunately shortly after he left and alerted me, his first student, we fell out of contact for years before I received news of his death." You can't say you're sorry about that, he didn't honestly sound that great but Melinda seems to hold him to too high of a pedestal for you to admit that. She gives a small sniffle and you find yourself clamping down on your cheek to stop from saying anything harsh. "Your father...he was a great wizard. It was truly unfortunate how he died. Betrayed by a woman he fell in love with at another kingdom and-"    "That's great, do tell me more about how he couldn't keep it in his pants." Namjoon snickers and you smirk at the look of rage that flashes in Melinda's eyes. It's completely worth it, she did enough toying with all of you earlier, forcing you to sit in silence just to tease you. That's not fair, maybe she was really just trying to gather your thoughts. Even if that is true though...really you're just too angry with her to care.    "Yes well, he was a great wizard but he was still a man after all." Apparently even she seems to realize that this Merlin man wasn't all he's cooked up to be even if it pains her to admit it. "Before he left for another kingdom though he made me promise that I would stay by your side. My entire coven has watched over you through the years, and I knew of the prophecy. I think Merlin also knew what it meant of your future, after all, you were his only child-"    "That you know of." She talks over you a little louder than she had previously.    "And that could only mean one thing." You glance over at Namjoon to see him shrug his shoulders at your unspoken question. Apparently, he has no clue what this rather ominous sounding 'only one thing' could mean. After witnessing the silent conversation between you two Melinda gave an exasperated sigh but continued. "That you were the fabled child. People will want to see if it's true. Other magicks, possibly other supernaturals perhaps even humans that hunt magicks."    "Yes well Melinda, other than getting married to Namjoon and having a philandering deadbeat but supposedly powerful father and a human queen mother I'm not really understanding why other supernatural powers would be interested in me based off of this prophecy."    "If you would stop interrupting I might be able to get to that." She sniffs with anger and allows the three of you to sit in agitated silence for what feels like an eternity before finally speaking again. "Merlin had his...faults...but before he died he was the most powerful wizard. It's said he was the first of our kind. His magic was unlike any other, he could do things that no one else could before anyone else could. He sealed away your powers to protect you, he also made sure to place a protection over you from turning. You as his child will have much of those powers that he had, if not completely new ones never before seen. Don't you understand? This is your fate!"    "Melinda, perhaps instead of coming here and telling me that (y/n) needed to leave with you or that she will die only to then spin some long and bizarre tale about Merlin being her father, you should start with this prophecy. Neither of us knows it, neither of us understands what's going on and honestly, I don't think either of us can trust you." Melinda seemed to shrink into herself, a crestfallen look overtaking her as she saw the agitation coating Namjoon.    "Yes, I suppose you're right. I...I think I got too worked up in the personal parts, parts that I have also been a part of. For too long I have waited to have this talk, for too long I have waited to train (y/n) and I can't expect either of you to understand how I feel or why I feel so strongly but please just listen to me and try to believe that I have nothing but good intent." She paused for a minute to gather her thoughts before sitting up straighter and looking directly at you. "All magicks have heard of this prophecy, it has been spun into so many different tales that many of us have forgotten the original. It explains that the greatest witch would be born from the greatest wizard and a human woman. The witch would be of goodness, of pure intent but of fearsome strength. She would be wed to the strongest werewolf. They say that he would be born in a pack with an unusual amount of alphas, born of two himself which is already very strange but perhaps strangest is that he would never have to fight for his spot and would mark a change of peace within werewolves ending a long war that had taken many lives. I think we can agree that so far the two of you match this tale exactly.    But what you'll find most interesting is what the prophecy says comes after that. Her powers would grow in the realm of the supernatural, beyond the realm of simple magick. It never explains why or how the seers are always cryptic about the possibilities. They say that her future is foggy, that there are many choices she can make. There is a future where her magick may overtake her and consume her whole, but there is also a possibility that she harnesses it for good and she becomes the queen of the supernatural bending the laws of magick that has long lived in a thin border of gods and humans making her nearly a goddess herself. She would mark a time of peace, ending the feuds among other supernaturals. If you do not train and the prophecy is right you will die. Why or how I will tell you I honestly don't know. I've never heard of magick consuming a person, but I've also never heard of someone having their powers sealed before birth even. How you will become the queen of the supernatural I also don't understand.    There are many different complex societies within the world of the supernatural. Werewolves are perhaps the easiest to understand, they have rules and ranks that are easy to follow. Vampires tend to be a little stranger simply for the fact that they do have royalty and they do occasionally live in groups but often they live alone. Demons have so many different levels and so many of them are at this point half human that it's just gotten even more entrenched in human society that that's just difficult to understand. Mermaids might at first glance seem to just be aquatic people but they're usually very entitled jerks. Magicks will sometimes have covens and sometimes work alone. I don't understand how one person will manage to become their queen, I don't understand honestly any of what it means. Many different tales have been made to try to fit all the holes in this story, but there is no point in telling you them because they're simply that. Just tales. Even the prophecy itself might be wrong, I don't know. But can the two of you honestly say that you're willing to just walk away when the magick inside you might somehow kill you?" Melinda had gotten up and was pacing as she spoke, a wild glint in her eyes as she pulled at her hair in frustration.    You didn't realize that you had moved to the edge of your seat to listen, your body pulled tight with nerves. You weren't sure about anything anymore, just a few days ago you would have scoffed at the notions of gods and couldn't even fathom the idea of anything that went beyond the realm of human. "Melinda...I have to ask you. You posed as the seer, you placed me here knowing that I would willingly sacrifice myself for the sake of my people. Was it all on a whim of this prophecy? Was it all to see if I was truly the one?"    Namjoon's eyes grew wide at that realization, but he remained silent as the two of you waited for her response. "I told you, from your birth I knew it had to be right."    Great, so had she not been corrected you would have been murdered in the woods as just another bloody sacrifice. "Namjoon, is it possible that I am not truly your mate?"    You could feel his anger brewing, emotions bursting forth inside him. You glanced next to you to realize that he looked calm and stoic, the connection the two of you had was the only clue of what was really laying under the surface. "(Y/N), there is no way that you are not my mate. Not even magic can interfere with that, no one can ever change who is your mate. We, werewolves that is, aren't sure how we are destined with our mates but we are before even birth. If there is anything you can be sure in, it is that you are meant to be mine and I am meant to be yours. That is the one and only thing I never want you to question, I beg of you to believe me. I understand that Melinda has meddled in this, even if it was with good intent but I have had nothing to do with it."    A part of you broke at that, he had always been by your side and you had just questioned that but you had to know. You took his hand in yours and gave it a reassuring squeeze and tried to force a smile. You're sure he could feel your sinking feelings when he drew closer to you, his warmth giving you much-needed comfort as you tried to process everything thrown at you. Finally, you sat up straighter and took in the sight of Melinda. Hair wild and unkempt, her face looking broken and worried and you felt yourself suddenly seeing her in another light. She looked scared almost, but she also looked nearly broken. She had done everything all wrong. She had come to you with arrogance (at the very least in your state of anger it certainly seemed that way), she had told you that your whole life had basically been a lie, she had then told you that death possibly loomed over you but as you took in this woman who was now consumed with an air of brokenness you couldn't help but believe her. Besides, is there really a right way to explain all of this? And if she just wanted your powers herself for personal gain would she not have just taken it? Why go to such great lengths to explain all of this to you? Why explain it to Namjoon as well?    "Melinda, I will train with you." Namjoon's grip tightened around you and you could feel everything crash around, his emotions pouring into yours before you continued. "But I will not leave the pack." Melinda and Namjoon both stopped breathing for a few seconds, both of them trying to process your statement. "If you will train me you will do so here. I see no reason why you can't."    Namjoon seemed to burst in elation, he wrapped you up into his arms and pulled you into his lap before burying his face in the crook of your neck. Melinda on the other hand still remained stock still, her face twisted in confusion.    "I...it's better to learn with a coven. The more minds the better, but if that's what you wish and if it's okay with Namjoon I will try my best princess. There will be much work to do for this. We will have to do a ceremony to break the seal on your powers and it will awaken the magick in the air, people will know you're here and I'm not sure what that might bring. I will have to place protective barriers around the village, but I can do all of that in one day. If it's okay with you I will try to bring others of my coven here. It will be necessary for the safety of the ceremony. Your powers have been bottled up for so long that once we rip the seal alway it will need to be done so carefully. I can't do it alone. They won't have to live here, I don't expect you to trust them Namjoon but I will need them here for the ceremony if we can't go to a place of already controlled and protected magick."    "I will explain everything to my people. Many of them have come to love and trust you. For the last few years, you have traded peacefully with us and have even become friends with our only healer. Had it not been for some of the resources you brought with us we might not have been able to heal as many as we did during the great war. We might not have won. They will not forget that, and neither have I. I trust you Melinda, and I trust your intentions. I am wary of your coven only because I don't know them, but for now they are allowed to visit. If they become trustworthy and my people agree then perhaps at that time your coven can live here but for now I can only promise you a place here. Just remember, if you ever do anything to break our trust or to harm (y/n)...if any of what you are doing is for just personal gain then I will end you myself."    Melinda gave a deep bow before she spoke. "I promise you, I would not do that. I might be terrible with words, and I might not be the best at explaining myself but I only have good intentions and I not only believe that you would harm me if I didn't but I appreciate that you would. I would not have sent (y/n) to you had I not believed you a man of great power, protection, and love." She walked over to the two of you and gave a gentle ruffle to your hair. "I will be back tomorrow princess. Get some rest, I know this has been a lot and I'm sorry for having to be the one to tell you all of this." Before you could respond she vanished in a bright blue light.    You sat in silence with Namjoon as the two of you tried to absorb everything. You were a witch, at least a half witch. You had a different blood father. A wizard. You were prophecied about. You had some sort of powerful magic inside you that others wanted. You might die from them, you might become a queen to the supernatural. You might manage to start a time of peace, as long as you don't die first. Closing your eyes you try to focus your thoughts. Something warm builds up inside your soul, something that sounds like a reassuring whisper. You aren't sure how you're going to do this, but you will survive. You will ensure safety for this pack. You are their Luna now first and foremost and you will not allow any harm to fall on them because of this new revelation. If you have powers to protect them then you will harness them not for yourself but for them. While protecting your people of the kingdom had before left your shoulders tense and your worries twisting away at you now you just felt fierce determination. You would make this work. You had to. For the pack. For Namjoon. For peace.

(A/N) whew, okay so done with part 7. What did you guys think? Did you expect it? Not expect it? Do you hate me (sorry Merlin)? I know this just got a lot more complicated, but it’s going to be an interesting ride! 

[hookahazz]

Chronicles of a Black Girl Vol 3:  Family Reunion |Harry Styles|

Warnings: Fluff, lil angst, cursing

Word Count: 2.8k

A/N:  Don’t kill me LMFAOO ik I said this morning but ya got it tonight. You got the trick from trick or treat. But this one is real cute and ish and I kept the same concept I just made it so that he meets her whole family and not just her parents. Please give me feedback and tell me how you felt. It’s much appreciated. Tell me how you honestly felt. I’m about to post the master list and it’ll show you the title of the next fic and that one and man y’all gone die its adorable. Enjoy pt 3 and thanks for reading all of them I appreciate y’all a fuck load. <3 

ASK BOX

If you don’t know, black people have three main values that are held above others: their hair, some good “put you to sleep after you eat about 2 plates” soul food and family. Family reunions and get-togethers are the highlights of the year. It is the time where they could all be together in one setting and enjoy one another's presence, the time where the adults would play spades and talk grown folk talk, and the time where your distant relatives would pull you into a hug filled with a strong perfume and hit you with that, “Oh hi baby, I haven’t seen you since you were two years old! You remember me?” There’s no greater feeling than being surrounded by those foil trays that were filled to the brim with mouth-watering sweet potatoes, potato salad (not the shit white people make with apples and all that other bullshit! as (Y/N) would put it), and that creamy, golden mac n’ cheese that black people would kill for (if made correctly, (Y/N)’s mom refuses to make anything but baked macaroni). The feeling of satisfaction one gets from being surrounded by uncles and aunties, grandmas and granddads, and listening to them tell stories about stuff that happened decades ago that still makes all of them laugh until they're crying. And the music! Oh yes-- that authentic soul music that was carefully constructed by the legendary artist who had the power to change peoples lives and move somebody's soul (Maze featuring Frankie Beverly, Michael Jackson, The Temptations, Gladys Knight, Ms. Lauryn Hill ((Y/N)'s ultimate favorite) , New Edition ). It was the music that would make those same aunts and uncles get up and dance horribly until their heart's content without the fear of judgment. Black people live for moments like such: to just sit around and be unconditionally black.

At the start of the semester, Harry and (Y/N) had been paired to do a project for their business law course (a class both of them regretted taking). At first (Y/N) was a little wary to be working with Harry, she'd never had any interaction with the boy except for when he asked to borrow a pencil and surprisingly gave it back in the end. After just twenty minutes of working with him, there wasn't a reason to be worried at all. In all her twenty-one years of living, she'd never met someone so goofy in her life (except her two older brothers). Harry was so sweet and funny it was almost hard to stay concentrated at the task at hand. That probably explains why they got a B- on the assignment instead of an A. Since then the two became friends, then best friends, and after months of teasing from Harrys best mate, Niall, they'd become boyfriend and girlfriend. 

They'd been dating for nearly three months and so far Harry's only met (Y/N)'s older brothers, Anthony and Caleb. Their first meeting wasn't in the most typical way. For one, all four of them were drunk off their asses after a night out at a frat party. Caleb and Anthony played multiple rounds of patty-cake with Harry, giggling while (Y/N) lied on her couch laughing at her toes. Her brothers adored Harry in every possible aspect. The three of them have become the best of friends and hang out all of the time which makes (Y/N) so, so happy. She's had a plethora of boyfriends (she’s quite the chocolate catch) and her brothers have hated every single one of them, always making sure (Y/N) knew that they aren't good enough for her. “You saw what he was wearing? His pants are sagging and falling to his fucking knees! His knees, (Y/N)!” Going from them to Harry was a drastic but much-needed change that both Caleb and Anthony appreciated a lot. They wanted nothing but the best for their baby sister and they knew Harry was as good as it was gonna get.

"So do you want to go with me? You don't have to if you're not ready, babe."  

On her way home from work she'd gotten a call from her dear mother regarding the annual family reunion and of course she invited Harry. Went on for nearly ten minutes about how “the two of you have been dating for three months, that boy's gonna have to meet the family sooner or later!” The conversation mainly consisted of momma (Y/L/N) talking and (Y/N) giving her a couple of mhm's and yes ma's here and there. "Course I'll come, lovie. Been dyin' to meet your family!" he beamed, excited as she had predicted. Harry valued family more than anything so meeting hers was a big step in their relationship. "You're not nervous or anything, right? I mean for real, if you are then we really don't even gotta go. They won't even miss us," she assured him. In all honesty, (Y/N) didn't want to rush anything with Harry. She really really liked him and she was fully aware of how rowdy and wild her family can get. 

"No babe, it's gonna be fun! M'excited!" he grinned wrapping his arm around his girlfriend's waist.

↫ ↬

Harry was never a shy or nervous person, it just wasn't him. He'd never really been in a situation where he was incredibly anxious and meeting (Y/N)'s parents were no different. He was absolutely positive that they'd love him and he assured (Y/N) that multiple times when she'd brought up meeting them. He was a people pleaser, someone who wanted to satisfy everyone, someone who naturally appealed to everyone. Harry had never been in a position to which he had to appeal to someone who didn't like him because everyone liked him, even if they didn't want to. 

"When is it again, button?" Harry questioned, playing with (Y/N)'s kinky locks.  She'd just finished washing her hair and Harry absolutely loved watching her condition and style it. "Uh, the day after tomorrow. So Wednesday? Yeah Wednesday," she concluded, slabbing on a generous amount of leave in conditioner. He grinned, doing the same to another section of her hair (he also enjoyed assisting her in styling her hair, the conditioner smelled of coconuts and almonds that nearly made him drool). "You're really excited aren't you?" she questioned. "Course I am. S'a big step in our relationship and I've always wanted to meet your parents. You're mum especially," (Y/N) snorted. Like the majority of black moms (Y/N)'s was crazy crazy. Her childhood consisted of a ton of life lessons that stemmed from a simple joke (Y/N) would make or a movie that wasn't meant to be taken way out of context, her mom constantly telling all her friends (some of which (Y/N) didn't even know) all of her business, and plenty of ass whoopings with the following: a switch, a belt, or any random object momma (Y/L/N) could get her hands on. "Oh yes, you'll love her. She's a peach."

"Oi, why are you laughin'?" he poked her sides.

"No reason baby,' she chuckled, pressing her lips to his cheek.

"I'm positive you're parents will love me. M'gonna be the first boyfriend your family likes. Even Caleb and Anthony said so!" She rolled her eyes, of course they would think so. They adore Harry because he's nothing like the lot of old boys she used to fool around with. "Yeah and you'll also be the first white boy I've brought home so that'll be something." she joked. Harry stiffened, "you're serious? They're not gonna like me then (Y/N)!" He began panicking. Not once did he think he'd need to worry about someone not liking him because of his skin color. Not once did he have to feel worried about being picked apart and judged based on the color of his skin. In fact, he'd never worried about anything regarding his skin tone because it has and would never affect his daily life. 

She turned, stopping the commotion with her hair to focus on her very panicky boyfriend who looked as if he were going to cry at any given moment. She wrapped her arms around him pulling him into a tight hug, rubbing her soft hands up and down his back (a tactic she learned only but weeks ago that would calm him down). "Hey, hey, hey. I was just joking, baby. You don't have to be worried about them not liking you because you're white. They don't care. You could be green and they'd still love you," she smiled, trying to contain a laugh. It was amusing to see how worked up he would get over minute situations like such. (Y/N) thought it was so adorable that he'd even cared so much.  "You're sure? They're not gonna kick me out or somethin' right?" he looked up at her. "I promise they won't," she laughed, she knew her family wasn’t like that. They loved everyone. Even with that, Harry was still convinced that (Y/N)'s family were going to hate him. He simply smiled and nodded and continued to work conditioner into her hair and twist it in hopes to calm him down.

↫ ↬

Now, the both of them were standing in front of (Y/N)'s parent's house waiting nervously for someone to answer the door and Harr, for the first time, really felt as though he was about to shit his pants on their poor porch. He wanted to run and hide behind her mothers beautiful rose bush and stay there until this whole conjuncture was over. He wrapped his long digits around (Y/N)'s and squeezed her hand for reassurance. "Hey, it's gonna be alright. I swear," she whispered just as the door began to open.

"(Y/N), my sweet grandbaby. I almost thought you weren't gonna show up!"

"Grandma!" (Y/N) smiled, engulfing the short woman in a hug. "Missed you so much," she smiled. They had a short conversation before she turned her attention to the six-foot boy behind (Y/N) who had been smiling at their very sweet interaction. "And who's this handsome young man you brought with you, suga?" Harry smiled, his nerves calming somewhat. He introduced himself, going in for a handshake but (Y/N)'s grandma slapped his hand away and pulled him down for a hug professing, you’re family now, act like it boy! "How cute. Oh!-- And muscular too! Chiiiild, wait till ya auntie gets a load of this one. Come on now, the rest of the family's in the backyard. Ya mommas in the kitchen talking shit per usual go help her, baby. I'll take care of Harry." she smiled, wrapping her arm around his. (Y/N) rolled her eyes and giggled at her grandmother's goofy antics and kissed Harry before walking away and assuring him that she'd be in the kitchen if he needed her.

Harry charmed (Y/N)'s grandmother, Kelly (grandma K is what she told him to call her since he was apart of the family now), rather fast. She led him to the back and introduced him to (Y/N)'s uncles, aunts, cousins, and all of her (including great) grandparents. All of them welcomed Harry with open arms. They had so many questions regarding his family and life in the UK, what he did for a living (he was CFO at a major marketing company, they were so proud of his title at such a young age, ya gotta be a stable man while dating our niece! her uncles would say), and his feelings about their (Y/N). An immense amount of aww's was given from the way he talked about her (Y/N's younger cousins, Mikayla and Jordan (ten), thought Harry was so cute and were really just aww'ing at how good he looked). Everyone was easily able to tell how in love Harry was with (Y/N) even though they haven't said it to one another yet (it’s only been three months)

"Harry, I fixed you a plate baby." (Y/N) smiled, interrupting a playful but heated conversation that Harry, her younger cousin Anthony (seventeen), and her father were having about the Chicago Bears and the Green Bay Packers. He smiled and grabbed the plate from her and motioned for her to sit in his lap. He pressed a kiss on her cheek and thanked her. Harry finally felt calm, that is until another short woman stepped in front of the two and began staring him down. It didn't take long for Harry to realize that it was (Y/N)'s mother, the resemblance was uncanny.  He nearly choked, becoming nervous yet again. This was the big boss. He thought he was going to be more afraid of (Y/N)'s dad who, though still wary of his little girl dating, (she's twenty- one) loves Harry. He even went as far as to invite Harry to the next super bowl party and he's never done that for any of (Y/N)'s boyfriends!

"(Y/N) who's this?" she questioned.

"Ma, this is Harry, my boyfriend. Harry this is my mom, Christine," Harry stood up to formally greet the woman with a handshake but she, much like her own mother, pulled him down into a bone-crushing hug. For such small women, they both had deadly grips. "Harry, it's so nice to finally meet you! Dunno why (Y/N)'s been hiding you from us, baby." she pinched his cheeks. "You's bout the cutest thing too!  Oh my lord!" she grinned. By now Harry was feeling like an idiot, the biggest fucking idiot. (Y/N)'s family had actually taken a liking to him. He did all that worrying for nothing, all that crying to (Y/N) over the phone at 2 AM because he couldn’t sleep for nothing, and spent all that time googling good reasons as to why you can't go to your girlfriends family reunion for nothing! 

"What are these?" Harry questioned.

"Those are called greens. It's good I promise." (Y/N) stifled a laugh. He’d been asking a lot of questions about the food simply because he’d never heard of some of it. After swallowing his first bite, he couldn't stop. Harry had devoured three plates of food and somehow managed to fit a serving from both her moms homemade banana pudding and her chocolate pie. "Bloody hell, that was so good." he yawned, nuzzling his head into the crook of her neck. "M'sleepy (Y/N)," she giggled, knowing good and well of the after effect of soul food, and kissed the top of his head.

"Damn it, why’d it take you so long to bring him ‘round here (Y/N)!" her aunts asked, playfully slapping her thigh. 

"I just didn't wanna rush anything, hop off! And on top of that, I told him he was the first white boy I'd ever brought home and he flipped shit on me! Thought y'all weren't gonna like him!" The lot of them erupted in a fit of laughter. "Oh child, you ain't gotta worry about that. We all love you to pieces. Such a cute thing you are. Better than those ol' raggedy hoodlums she used to bring 'round here before!" her grandmother interjected, swatting at her thigh as well.

"Grandma K! See now why you gotta go and bring them up. That was in high school!" (Y/N) whined, gaining a loud laugh from her grandmother. She'd never been any good at picking boyfriends. None of her family members ever liked any of them, they truly were a bad influence on her.

The rest of the night concluded in her family telling the most embarrassing stories from her childhood to Harry. (Y/N) didn't think they were funny at all but Harry was proper amused. I'm talking doubled over, gasping for air, tears spilling down his cheeks amused. What made it even funnier was how annoyed she was getting, stomping and whining like a two-year-old. "Ugh, man I swear I hate y'all! You're supposed to be on my side Harry!" she shoved him to the ground.

"Baby, stop!" he nearly choked, trying to catch his breath all while laughing and trying to keep his very cute (but very annoyed) girlfriend from attacking him. "(Y/N) stop! You're gonna mess his face up!" Mikayla and Jordan tugged at her shirt, somehow pulling her off of Harry. Now everyone was laughing at the scene.

"M'very sorry for laughing at how you shit on your mum's hand as a baby, love." Harry smiled, kissing all over her face (a tactic he learned that made her forgive him almost immediately). She shoved him back one last time and laughed. "I hate y'all for real!" Harry grinned, settling back in his rather comfortable fold out chair and pulled (Y/N) back onto his lap.

"M'glad we came. I really did all that worrying for nothing, petal. Your family loves me like I knew they would." he joked.

She rolled her eyes, "don't act like you weren't about to shit yourself earlier, big shot."  "Lower your voice!"  he warned, earning yet another laugh from grandma K.

"No need to get embarrassed suga! I told ya, you's apart of the family now. Now come over here and dance with an old lady," she commanded, gaining a large grin from both Harry and (Y/N).

[lambroseforlife]

Hey! I’d like to see what would’ve happened if Lily wanted to be with James Carter in silence is breaking, you know the chapter when he wanted her to marry him

This prompt pretty much goes against my username but hey, people need to be pushed out of their writing comfort zone for improvement, right? So here we go. This is written in first-person POV and set in the same canon universe with a timeline that diverges from Silence Breaking, Chapter 25: “Romance in the Air”.

⚠️WARNING: Hardcore lambrose shippers or those who haven’t Silence Breaking yet and want to avoid spoilers, DON’T read this oneshot!! ⚠️

**DISCLAIMER: The text in  is from the main series and NOT my writing. The beginning contains an excerpt taken from Silence Breaking, Chapter 25 and I used a quote later on from Storm and Silence, Chapter 69: “Seeing Stars”. Both were written by Robert Thier. I do NOT claim credit for them at all and am incorporating it merely for the purpose of transitioning/recap into this canon divergence oneshot**

— — —

‘Miss Lillian Linton, I love you. I love your fiery spirit. I love the way you dance and laugh and live to the full, and always fight for what you believe in. Will you—’

‘—marry me?’ I guessed.

‘Bloody hell, that was supposed to be my proposal!’

I smiled up at him apologetically. ‘Sorry.’

Silence stretched between us. I gazed up into his face, the face of one of my best friends in all the world, and wondered how things had come to this? How had I not seen this in him before that day in Newcastle? How could I have missed it?

‘Well?’ he asked, his voice hardly more than a whisper. ‘Will you?’

I bit my lip, trying to find the right words to say. Blast! How did one reject a proposal from someone they were quite fond of?

My mouth opened to speak. 

And closed.

Damn it! Why was it so hard to tell him no? The romance novels that my sisters read made it look simple. Reject the roguish suitor maliciously pining for the heroine’s affections. There, problem solved.

So why wasn’t it working here?

Captain Carter looked at me expectantly, still waiting for my answer. The heat emanating from his hand burned into mine. That must have been the reason my ears suddenly tinged red.

‘Captain Carter, I…’

I hesitated.

Do it, Lilly! Turn down his proposal now! With a firm, resounding “no”!

But he looked so sincere. His warm brown eyes created a snug, comfortable shelter that enveloped us. One that even the biting cold couldn’t pierce through.

Just tell him how you feel already! What are you waiting for?

Therein lay the problem.

How did I feel about him?

Did I love Captain James Carter? No. I knew that I definitely didn’t. But…

I possibly could with time. In a different universe, in different circumstances and under different rules.

But why couldn’t that be in this one?

‘Miss Linton?’ My eyes focused back on Captain Carter. His voice sounded alarmed. His other hand reached out and gently clasped my chin, lifting it.

‘Are you unwell?’ Yes, definitely alarm. ‘Should we head back instead? We can resume this later if you need more time to give me an answer.’

‘Please, I am all right.’ Did the soft, breathless voice really belong to me? ‘There is much I wish to say, but I am unsure of where to begin.’

‘Are you sure you are not ill?’ Concern shone in his eyes.

‘I am sure. Please, I need a minute to gather my thoughts.’

Did I say “please” twice? Dear me, the cold must have affected my brain.

‘Very well.’ He frowned and released his hands, taking a step back. ‘Take all the time you need.’

A roguish suitor with charm and manners? My, this was more difficult than I expected.

An unbidden thought crossed my mind. Maybe he wasn’t confined to be just the roguish suitor.

Perhaps he was meant to be more.

Are you insane? My inner voice screamed at me. What about a certain cold employer that you have been clandestinely conducting an affair with for the past year?

And there presented itself another teeny, tiny problem. Clandestine as in secretive. Ergo, no one would ever know about Mr Ambrose and I. We were polar opposites from two completely different worlds.

Maybe his path and mine could never completely overlap. Touch, yes. But how long could ice and fire remain intact when in contact?

The answer was simple. Not for very long.

He was a chauvinist. And I a feminist. He represented everything I believed against and I the same for him.

But he still hired you. Protected you. Trusted you. Maybe even lov—

I clamped down on that thought. Working for him hadn’t been easy, regardless. More like painstakingly challenging. Gruelling. It had been quite the experience.

Is that good or bad?

Both.

But back to the matter at hand. What was it again?

Oh, right. Captain Carter’s proposal.

Why couldn’t I say no?

Maybe it was because, deep down, I already knew. He was someone who wholeheartedly accepted me. Openly embraced how I was without question. With him, there were no disguises, no alter egos involved. With him, I could be myself. Rejecting him would be throwing away a golden opportunity for an easy and happy life.

Easy, yes. But happy? You could be happy with someone else. A certain obnoxiously rich miser…

Who kept his wallet and probably his heart stuffed up that his firm derrière of his. That very one?

Aren’t you supposed to be a feminist? Considering marriage over your career? Where is your sense of dignity as an independent, hard-working woman?

Still with me and completely intact, thank you very much!

Marriage over my job? That sounded counter-intuitive in regards to what I valued the most.

My freedom. My independence.

But was I really free and independent while working for Mr Ambrose?

He expected complete submission from all his employees. And I was no exception. He made it clear that for him, money came first. Always. He was driven by profits, sales and all matters centreing on monetary gain. Mammon forbid anything come in between him and his precious purse, let alone taxes or strange urges for romantic affection to a woman.

‘Oh you’ll have money…you still won’t be free, though.’ I recalled his words from a drunken night in his office long ago. ‘Just like in marriage, you’ll still be tied to a man— to me.’

I scowled. Working for him would be no different than being married to him. He would demand obedience from anyone tied to him as long as it involved a contract.

Wait. What?

Marriage? With Mr Ambrose? Why was I thinking about him when another man had proposed to me barely minutes ago? Even with said man still patiently waiting for my response?

Because you’re in love with Rikkard Ambrose.

Stupid inner voice of mine! Couldn’t it shut up for two minutes while I tried to think?

Silence.

Ah, much better. Now back to my previous thought.

Plausibly, if Mr Ambrose were to ever take leave of his senses and fully reciprocate my feelings for him, one of two things would happen.

One: Carry on as if nothing changed. Our dalliances would continue behind closed doors and in the dark. While our outward appearance of boss and secretary resumed during business hours and in public.

Two: Propose marriage to me.

The first option didn’t sound so bad until recently. Our relationship had changed since the other guests arrived at Battlewood. Frighteningly, not for the better. It felt like we were caught in a cat-and-mouse situation. Constantly exchanging roles in a battle for power.

Was it normal to not trust the person you love?

Until coming to Battlewood, I had trusted Mr Ambrose unconditionally. We’d had each others backs in France, in the sand-ridden desert, and in the war-ridden jungles of South America. I trusted him with my life. He trusted me with his. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have survived.

But could I trust him with my heart?

I wasn’t so sure anymore. Ever since Captain Carter’s arrival, he had shown a more…violent side of himself. But not completely in the physical sense. Since Newcastle, something dark and intense festered away inside him. Something more terrifying than thrilling. I could be sitting next to him but he still would be miles away. Unreachable. Impenetrable. Cased inside that stone mask he wore. 

Jealousy and isolation were two weapons he wielded well. Even better than the revolver on his holster. He staked a claim on me, not allowing other men to approach me while he let other women flirt with him freely, even reciprocating at times. The memory of his hypocrisy was enough to drive ice through my veins.

I had tried to reach through to him, to explain. But he wouldn’t listen. He was too stubborn and hard-headed. Thus, I had been forced to resort to more drastic measures. All to ensure the dear captain’s safety. I had attempted to use Mr Ambrose’s strategy: conduct a business transaction of sorts. But he had proven his vast experience. Once again, he was the calculating feline and I the outwitted prey.

Suppose that in the highly unlikely, extremely bizarre occurrence (even in an imaginary situation) that Mr Ambrose chose the second option, proposing matrimony. What then? Our relationship would still unlikely improve. Marriage was a certified way for men to obtain power on par with that of monarchs. Wives were their subjects, duly vulnerable to being tyrannised and subjugated to a husband’s will. In stories that my friends had told me, some were even physically beaten.

If Mr Ambrose was this restrictive already, then how much worse would he be if I were to marry him?

A harrowing chill settled to my very bones.

I knew that Mr Ambrose was never the type to raise his hand to a female. But that didn’t exclude other ways he could control others. A powerful man like him thrived on dominance and authority. For him, marriage would be perceived as a way to exercise that. The standard wedding vows required a wife to pledge submission and obedience to her husband at the altar. Vows that I refused to agree with.

Vows that Mr Ambrose would definitely enforce, seeing it as the terms outlined for a contract.

Isn’t he doing that already? You are one of his employees, contracted to him.

Yes, but I had willingly done so, seeing it as trade for a salary. An earning that would grant me the freedom I craved. Anytime I wished to do so, I could resign from my job. I was only legally bound during the period of employment. Marriage on the other hand…

Marriage was permanent. In sickness and in health. For better or for worse. Until death.

However if he loved me enough to propose…

Then he wouldn’t dare to demand from me. Not if he valued his head intact!

But then again…

Would it really be a surprise if he did? Considering his recent disregard towards everything I had said to him?

Probably not.

Knowing him, he wouldn’t even bother to propose properly. Oh no, that would be an utter waste of time for Mister “knowledge is power is time is money” Ambrose. He would most likely order for my hand in marriage and automatically expect a “yes, sir!”

My nostrils flared. Why was it that only now, after working for the blasted miser for almost a year and a half, that I realised how trapped I was? 

Perhaps, that nasty inner voice of mine whispered vindictively, because another alternative has presented itself.

I had viewed money as a means to earn my freedom. To be financially independent from my aunt and uncle without being restrained by another man. Only in the process to lose both myself and all possibility of obtaining it once I had fallen for a man who was the paragon of control.

And now, it seemed that I had a slim chance of obtaining my freedom again. In the one way that I had deemed as being the most restrictive.

The irony made me smile humourlessly.

I loved Rikkard Ambrose, I really did.

But what was more important, my heart or my soul? 

I couldn’t keep both. One had to be sacrificed.

If I rejected Captain Carter, then inevitably I would choose Mr Ambrose. Eventually, I would lose my soul, my morals and all that I had fought for. With Mr Ambrose, I might be happy for a short while. But I couldn’t be myself. I would be a bird ensnared in a cage for the rest of my life.

If I chose Captain Carter, then I would reject Mr Ambrose. My heart would be broken and with it, the capacity to love someone again wholly. It would be a burden to the good captain, having to pick up the pieces for someone who didn’t reciprocate his love. A kind person like him didn’t deserve to be second place to a memory.

I sighed.

“Well?” The captain’s voice drifted over from the grove of trees. He was leaning against one of them, the back of his bright red military coat facing me. “Have you gathered your thoughts, Miss Linton?”

“Um, yes.” I looked down.

Polished black boots entered my vision and I looked up to see Captain Carter approaching me.

‘There’s someone else, isn’t there?’

I instantly knew what he meant.

‘Yes. And no.’

‘I beg your pardon, Miss Linton?’ His brow furrowed.

‘There…is someone else.’ His face fell. ‘But…’

‘But?’

‘Even though he is what I wanted, I’m…not sure if he is what I need now.’

His eyes narrowed.‘Did he do something bad? Has he hurt you?’ He took my hands into his again.

‘No. No, he hasn’t but…’ I trailed off, shaking my head.

At least not physically.

He squeezed my hands gently and a painful sensation tugged at my heart. On cue, something slipped out of my eye and slid down my cheek. Another. And another.

If I had thought that Captain Carter was alarmed before, then it was nothing compared to his expression now. Releasing my hands, he reached into his trouser pocket and tugged. He silently pulled out a handkerchief and held it out to me.

‘Thank you.’ I accepted it.

Wiping my face, I looked at him again while clutching the damp cloth. ‘I apologise. After you asked your question, I had a revelation of sorts. A painful one.’

He waited for me to continue.

‘I realised someone who I have feelings for, that he and I may not belong together.’

‘Why is that?’ He was solemn.

‘We always argue. And hurt each other. Even from the start, we didn’t exactly get along. I…’ I took a deep breath. ‘Loving him is painful. I don’t know if I can anymore.’

Captain Carter took a step forward. He was standing merely inches away, those sincere, brown eyes of his boring downwards into my own.

‘You deserve better.’

I met his gaze head-on, refusing to look away.

‘Can you offer me better?’ My voice trembled.

‘I don’t know,’ he whispered. ‘But all I know that is that I would spend my entire life trying, Lilly. If you would permit me.’

‘I don’t love you like you love me.’

‘I have enough love to carry the both of us.’

‘I’m a feminist.’

‘One of my favourite things about you.’

‘I don’t want to be an appendage to a man.’

‘And you won’t. Not to me. We will be equal partnerssupporting each other.’

‘I refuse to agree to theobedience and submission part of the wedding vows.’

‘Then I’ll have the priestexclude them.’

I gaped at him in shock. ‘Really? You would do that for me?’

‘I would.’ His lips curvedinto one of his old smiles that I knew and enjoyed so much. ‘Just for you.’

‘I love travelling.’ A hint of amusement tinged my voice. ‘Would you bring me along on your military expeditions?’

‘Yes. Except for the most dangerous ones.’

I stared as he dropped to one knee. With one hand, he withdrew a ring from his pocket and took hold of my left hand using the other. 

‘Miss Lillian Linton…will you do me the immense honour of becoming my wife?’

I swallowed, hard, and softly uttered the dreaded word that would change everything forever.

‘Yes.’

He slipped the simple gold band onto my ring finger. It was a bit tight but still managed to fit.

He brought my hand to his lips and pressed a soft kiss on the back. With an expression that could only be described as smitten, unwavering adoration, he looked up at me.  

I tried to smile. I honestly did. But my lips only twitched upwards.

Captain Carter stood up and pulled me into a warm embrace. My arms wrapped around him numbly. My heart hammered nervously in my ears. He must have asked me something and expected a response for in the next moment, he pulled away with a questioning look.

He opened his mouth to speak and—

‘Am I interrupting something?’

A horribly familiar voice cut through the air. Sharp and curt. Dread crawled up my spine.

A tall, menacing figure appeared into view from behind the trees. I looked at the ground. The tree branches. Anywhere but him.

Captain Carter spoke up. ‘As a matter of fact, yes.’

‘Indeed?’ I had never heard that word spoken with so much hostility. Not until now.

‘I was speaking with my future wife here. Is there something you need?’

‘Yes. I need Miss Linton’s help to locate her brother for a business discussion.’

‘I can help you find him.’ I looked up at Captain Carter only, refusing to make eye contact with him. I could feel his wintry gaze boring into me. It sent chills throughout my body. ‘May I take my leave for now?’

‘Of, course. I’ll head back to the manor and inform everyone of the good news.’

Oh, right. The good news of my recent engagement.

Blast!

He brought my hand— the one with the sparkly gold band on it— to his lips and pressed another kiss to it.

If the air had been frozen before, then it was positively frigid now. Knots of  terrible foreboding built in my stomach. However, the captain didn’t detect anything and with an ‘Until later, my love,’ departed into the distance.

‘My love?’ I risked a glance up at him to see a pair of hands pounce towards me. The next moment I was picked up by my shoulders. My back slammed with impact against one of the trees. His hands released me, only to curl into fists that rested on each side of my head, preventing any escape.

Shivering, I gazed up into his dark, sea-coloured eyes. Eyes that reflected rage. Confusion.

Betrayal.

‘What was that?’ His voice carried the force of a thousand hydras, hellbent on destruction.

‘I-I’m guessing you heard?’ Crap! Why was my voice so squeaky?

He leaned in, pinning me in place with his deadly stare. ‘Every. Single. Word.’

I gulped. ‘Then I don’t need to say anything.’

‘I couldn’t disagree more. You owe me an explanation, Mr Linton.’

‘I don’t owe you anything. Except a resignation letter.’ I struggled to keep my voice steady. My breath came out in pants.

A storm roiled in those terrifyingly beautiful eyes of his.

‘You are mine. You aren’t going anywhere without my permission.’

He lunged forward and instinctively, I knew what he was going to do. Panic surged through me. 

On reflex, my hand moved of its own accord.

Before his lips could make contact with mine, I slapped his cheek. The sound echoed throughout the trees.

He stumbled back in surprise. His hard hand reached up to graze the area where an angry red handprint was now forming.

Silence reigned.

After a long time, he finally spoke.

‘Just tell me why. Why you chose him.’ 

Was his voice hoarse?

‘Because of you,’ I whispered. Moisture clouded my vision. ‘I wanted my freedom.’

‘Me?’ His jaw tightened. ‘Explain to me, Mr Linton, how running from one man into the arms of another grants you the freedom that you speak of. I fail to see the effectiveness.’

‘You were restricting me. Treating me like one of your possessions. To you, I’m a rare creature meant to be put into a cage. But that’s not who I am.’

‘And where does the captain factor into all this?’

‘He…understands me. Maybe not completely. But what you want to control of me, he accepts. Openly.’

Silence. His pinkie twitched in a steady rhythm.

I continued. ‘The matter came to choosing between me and you. Like you, I decided to be selfish for once. So I chose me. Since you wouldn’t.’

He still said nothing.

‘It’s too late, Mr Ambrose. I’ve made my choice.’

‘This,’ he said, his voice promising retribution from the deepest Arctic tundras in the coldest of winters, ‘this is not over, Mr Linton.’

He whirled around and marched away, his hands clenched into fists. In the process, ripping my heart out and stealing it with him as I knew he would.

I slumped against the tree.

But it was over.

He just didn’t realise it yet.

— — —

Well, I hope you were able to make it until the end to read it. I did my best to channel book 1 Lilly since she was more introspective and firmly set on her core beliefs. I hope she isn’t too out of character here but then again, her choosing Carter is an action out of character itself in regards to the entire series. And one not without drastic effects. 

Wondering why this had such an angsty ending and not a happy one? Well, keep in mind of how possessive and emotionally unstable Mr Ambrose’s character was presented as in Silence Breaking. I wanted to stay consistent to that for this prompt. 

We already read how he tried to have Carter added to the waste disposal list and had Karim “guard” Lilly before Carter even proposed to her all out of his own fear. We even saw what he did to Captain Carter despite Lilly rejecting his proposal in Chapter 27. So riddle me this, what do you think Mr Ambrose would have ultimately done if Lilly had said yes instead? I will leave that to the worst of your imaginations.

Hardcore lambrose shippers, please don’t hate me for this. I just tried to answer this prompt to the best of my abilities. Writing this was quite challenging for me, both mentally and emotionally, so I imagine it must be the same, if not worse for some of you readers as well. Or hey, maybe you’re completely anti-lambrose and did a happy dance while reading this. Either way, I hope that this caught your attention at the very least.

[hermithag22]

Unconditionally

    “Rey, I’m…” he stopped suddenly when he realized it wasn’t Rey the Force was connecting him to: when it was a different voice he heard.

    “Hello Ben.”

    “Mother.” He said coldly, turning away as quickly as he had spun to face her.  He’d never called her mother before.  Mama or mom were comfortable, but her appearance here wasn’t a comfort.  It felt like an intrusion.  He didn’t even look at her, really; heard her voice and recoiled from it.  “I knew you were strong with the Force, but this is impressive.”  He admitted, sitting in a chair nearby and staring at the ground.  

    He’d faced terrifying beings, pain, and death - by his hand and others - tremendous fear, and all manner of carnage, but the face of his own mother caused feelings within he wasn’t willing to confront.

    She acknowledged his determination - his decision not to look at her - and grimaced, then rolled her eyes and looked through the window to the stars outside.  “Lovely view.  Is there a reason you’ve traveled this far from civilization… alone.”

    “I’m never alone.” He said darkly.  Then, before she could analyze his implications he added, “There are always troopers nearby, not that I need them.”  His last word dripped with loathing thick as molasses.  Hux had insisted he take a small guard in case he was found by the Resistance.  Part of him suspected Hux of sending his soldiers to take Ren out, but he didn’t sense a plan when searching Hux’s thoughts and feelings. Good. Ren had thought. He’s not foolish enough to think his soldiers capable of such an assignment.  

Ren had argued, knowing there was no way the inconsequential Resistance could find him and even if they did, he could take care of them himself, but Hux insisted and he eventually agreed, if only to shut the man up.  Snoke was right about him being a valuable asset and he could appease him with such a simple request.

At the time a shock of fear had passed through Ren as he wondered if Hux sensed the connection he had with Rey and what that could lead to.  The troopers were an advantage in large scale battles and losing Hux could mean losing the loyalty of his army: not a conducive incident when attempting to secure control over an entire galaxy, but even if the wary general was suspicious of him, he could not guess that Ren and Rey were able to see each other whenever the Force connected them - or how he felt about her.  Plus, she was never able to see his surroundings so he needn’t worry about her finding him.  

But if she couldn’t see his surroundings, then how…?

“What is it you see?” He asked his mother, curiosity overpowering his determination not to speak to her.  

    “Did I ever tell you I would call you “My little angel,” while I was pregnant?  I could feel your tenderness, your sensitivity, in the womb.  Your father called you “the little bandit.”  She smiled sadly and Kylo Ren, bitterly.  “He wasn’t the first to compare a child growing in his mothers’ belly to a thief or a parasite. Even I have to admit, I wasn’t completely prepared for what carrying a child would do to my body.  Lately though, with all this time I’ve had to think about it…” she paused, collecting herself as she attempted to finish her thought, to tell her son something he may not even want to hear, “... lately, I think it may have been more because he knew, or was hoping, you’d be more like him than me.  I think I imagined you to be like your uncle and grandfather.  I imagined you pink skinned with golden hair.. cherubic - a tiny, blond angel surrounded by light.”  She chuckled again to herself, “Imagine my surprise when you showed up black haired and earnest.”  She held her arms in front of her like she could imagine her newborn in her arms and added, “You would smile and coo like any other baby, you were quite sweet, but you would also get this look on your face,” she puckered her lips and frowned, attempting to recreate the look.  “You’d get this contemplative expression - made you look like an old man.  We would laugh and you’d look up, surprised, and smile at us.”  She smiled though her lips pulled down at the ends.  If she could still cry, she would have, but it wasn’t a task she could accomplish in this form.

    He straightened slightly, but still refused to look at her.  Instead he brought his hands together and began manipulating his fingers, one at a time, until the bones popped in a satisfying way.  “So, I was always a disappointment to you?” He said, low and almost inaudibly.  It didn’t matter at which volume he spoke, she would have heard.  He could whisper and his doubts, his concerns and insecurities, would be as clear as a bell to his mother.  

    “Ben, I love you.  I’ve always loved you and the day you were born was the proudest of my life.  I’ll flatter myself by admitting, that’s saying a lot.  If there’s one person who traversed the stars who loves you unconditionally and always saw the best of you, it was me.  Let’s not waste time with self deprecation and doubt.  You know you were not a disappointment to me.”  She reprimanded, harshly.  When she turned to look at him, his head still down, she felt guilty and forced a calm over herself, remembering her objective.  “I was simply reminiscing of how we thought of you before you were born.  How each of us hoped you’d be like us, which you were in many ways, including your austerity.  If only we could have had more of a say.  If only we’d known what was going on and how you were being manipulated, even as an infant.”

    “But you didn’t know.  You say you loved me unconditionally, but you never really knew me.  You didn’t try.”  He said, his lower lip trembling slightly.  He lowered his head to hide it and his dark hair fell across his face like a curtain.  She wanted to reach out, to lift his chin and tuck his hair behind his ear so she could see into those dark eyes, so much like his fathers, but she couldn’t do that even if it was physically possible.  He’d never allow it.

    It was pointless to continue trying to convince him of the love his parents had for him.  Too much time had passed and his opinion of his parents, though difficult to swallow, was fairly felt and carved into his soul as permanent as the scar on his face.  “Fortunately… for you… I’m not the only person who loves you unconditionally,” she said, focusing on the scar and remembering her mission; the reason she’d worked so hard to find him.

    Ren frowned and almost looked up, but turned away instead, facing the same stars she fixed her gaze upon outside the wide window which spanned the length of his cabin.  Who? The word echoed in his head and though he didn’t speak it, she responded directly.

“Rey may be disappointed, son, but she cares for you deeply.  You must know that.  You must be able to sense it, even if you insist on suppressing the thought.”   

Ren grimaced, scoffed, and rolled his eyes.  “She has a funny way of showing it.  Was I supposed to sense it when she abandoned me, unconscious, on a collapsing ship?  Or when, instead of taking my outstretched hand, she reached for the saber in the other, in hopes of attacking me?”  His voice was like a growl and his fists and jaw were clenched tightly.  The memory of this betrayal still stung anew each time he thought of what he’d sacrificed and how she had repaid him.  “I k…” He stopped, took a deep breath, and continued in a whisper, altering his confession in case someone was listening,  “She must have told you what I did… the offer I made.”

Leia nodded, then remembered he wasn’t looking at her. “Yes.  She told me everything… and for now we’ll avoid discussing what Snoke’s death means to me in relation to you.”  She responded calmly.  

It had been one of the most thrilling moments of her life, when Rey told Leia the story.  How her son was faced with assassinating the young woman and instead, he killed the man who had taken her son from her.  Ben Solo had killed his abuser, the man he’d been victim to most of his life and as Leia saw it, the man who had abducted him from his family.

Snoke convinced Ben that any loving thought he had was a weakness and so was his pull to the light.  He punished Kylo Ren when he sensed the negative effect the dark side had on the young man, while simultaneously encouraging him to use that conflict to feed his power.  He twisted her kind, lovely, dark angel into a tortured, angry, mess of a man and if Rey could influence that level of sacrifice, then maybe Luke was right; maybe Ben was not beyond returning to the light after all.

After hearing of this sacrifice, many doubted the meaning Leia took from it, but she wasn’t swayed by their negativity and, admittedly justifiable, doubt.  Especially not when Rey explained the look on his face after he’d turned the lightsaber on his leader and ignited it to split the man in two.

“So desperate.  I’d thought him monstrous and hateful, with no hint of light left within him,” Rey admitted hesitantly, hoping this wouldn’t hurt or offend Leia and also hoping her companions would understand the next confession she had to give, ”but when we were connected I could feel the conflict, though I still couldn’t be sure.  The man I saw in that moment was not the same man we’d fought in the forest and if we didn’t have to fight for our lives just then, maybe things would be different. Maybe we could have had time to talk, but… saving me was a huge sacrifice on his part and though I recognize that, and his desire to do what he believes is right, I couldn’t join him.”  

Leia could tell Rey felt guilty.  Just as Luke’s split second reaction had resulted in Ben Solo becoming the murderous Kylo Ren, Rey’s rejection had motivated a tantrum from Ren so great it had almost been the end of the Resistance.  “Thank goodness Luke returned.”  Rey said, relaxing slightly.  Rey had begged Luke to help and when he refused she believed Ben was their only chance to defeat the First Order.  She wasn’t sure if she had failed Ben or the other way around, but she knew it was Luke’s sacrifice that saved the Resistance, which would add kindling to the fire that was his legend, whether he liked it or not.

“Luke implied there’s still hope for Ben.  It was hard to accept then, but knowing what he sacrificed… for you…” Leia began, but there was an interruption.

A scoff behind Leia and Rey caused them to turn and see Poe Dameron pace away, then turn back, looking exasperated.  “I’m sorry General, I know he’s your child, but nothing you say can convince me that Kylo Ren killed his supreme leader for any other reason than the man was a threat to him and stood in his way.  He didn’t kill Snoke, then ask Rey to join the Resistance!  He wants power.  He wants to rule the galaxy and now he’s in the perfect position to do so.”

It was difficult to argue with that, as it was mostly likely, even if only partially, true, so they didn’t try.  

“I understand why you would believe that” Leia began, standing and turning to face Poe, “but if you don’t mind, I will continue to believe there’s still hope for my child.”  She walked out then, without another word.

“Of course.” Poe said, nodding and watching as she retreated.

Rey sat quietly, thinking through the events again.  Had he only killed Snoke to seize his position as supreme leader? No.  He could have done that at any time.  It was in the moment he was being told to execute me that he ended Snoke.  Plus, there was that look in his eye.  He must care.

Leia found Rey alone later, apologized for any intrusion, and expressed her hope to hear more about Rey’s interactions with her son.  Rey had been brief with every remaining member of the Resistance, the small handful lingering in the communal space of the Millenium Falcon, standing by to hear what had happened on massive ship, Supremacy.  Rey had begun with an explanation of their connection while she was on Ahch-to, which led to her lonely flight onto the Supremacy to face Ben Solo and Snoke.  That’s all they needed to hear.

With Leia, she didn’t share how, despite Snoke’s claim he’d connected them, she’d still seen Kylo Ren as they boarded the Falcon after Snoke’s death, but shared, with more detail, the fleeting conversations.  She confessed that once she knew what occurred between Ben and Luke she softened toward him.  She confessed her own grief and how she’d reached out, scared he’d refuse her and leave her feeling more alone than she felt on the island with failed expectations and dashed hopes.  

“But he removed his glove and slowly pressed his fingers to mine.  And I felt…”

“Complete.” Leia finished for her.  

The girl looked up, eyes wide and wet.“Yes, but how do you…?”

Leia smiled.  “It’s clear you two have a connection.  I don’t know if it’s exactly as Snoke claims, but you said that once you were on the lift, alone together, you felt as though you’d found your purpose.”

Rey nodded.  “As soon as I decided to go to him I felt I was no longer searching for my place.  I’d found it.  I felt, and still feel, responsible for him, knowing some of what he’s been through and knowing there must be a reason he confided in me.”  Rey looked down, ashamed.  “I’m sorry Leia.  I thought I could save him and I failed.”

“No, dear girl.  You made the right choice.”  Leia wrapped her arms around Rey and pulled her close, their knees bumping together as they sat.  “I probably would have made the same choice, no matter how desperate I am for him to return to us.”  She chuckled airily.  “Everything is just so…out of control.  I wish I knew how to turn him away from that desire for power.  I wish I knew what to say, how to guide you, but I’m as lost as anyone on how to reach my son.  It’s not like we can have diplomatic conversations with someone aspiring to be a dictator.”  She said sorely.  “But you’re still here and there’s still time to save him.”

Rey nodded slowly and said, “I wish the others could have seen what I saw: who I saw.  I tried to explain it, but it’s difficult when they only know him as Kylo Ren, the fierce warrior of the First Order.  I don’t want them to think I’m sympathetic to a monster or blind to his actions, but they didn’t see the desperate, pleading face of a man who killed his master to save my life or how we fought for our lives together.  They didn’t see the tremble in his lower lip and hear the agony in his “Please,” as he begged me to leave everything behind and join him.  Ben Solo returned, if only for that moment, and I’ll never doubt the possibility again.  Never.”  She said as tears streamed down her cheeks.

Leia sniffed and held the girl again, so filled with gratitude her heart could burst.  

That was months ago.  Leia continued to try and speak with Rey about Ben and though Rey still claims she believes Ben Solo can return to the light, they have no idea how and it’s left Rey dispirited.  One of the last times she saw Rey she heard her trying to convince Finn of Ben’s goodness and it pleased Leia, but she wasn’t sure how long Rey could coast on the fumes of the few good memories she and Ben had shared.  It would be difficult for Rey with his reputation throughout the Resistance and the Galaxy and with a friend, once a Storm Trooper, who witnessed the terror; one among an army who had nicknamed her son “Jedi Killer.”

    Leia stared at Ren now, desperate for the words to convince him of Rey’s concern for him.  It should be simple; just tell him the truth, but truth was difficult with someone so despondent he doubted any kind words, any well meaning intent.

“Have you seen her… since that day?” Leia wondered.

“No.” He said shortly and she could sense his disappointment. “There have been a few times, fleeting moments, I thought I felt her presence, but she never appeared.  Maybe the connection has weakened or maybe she's found a way to block it.  She is mad at me.”  He said lightly.  He was thinking of how they’d connected before, how angry she was - that look in her eye - and his mouth curled at the ends, not quite a smile, but close.  As one who is never purely happy, Kylo Ren didn't smile, ever, but it was something his lips attempted when he was amused.

He had hoped, after some time, he would see her again.  He'd done terrible things before and she forgave him: could it happen again?  Could he make her see what they could do, together, and convince her to join him?  He huffed and shook his head, ceaseless in his denial of weak desires brought on by a compassionate upbringing.  He wasn't Ben Solo anymore.  He told Rey they needed to leave the past behind and he meant it.  They could be so much more.  

There was no end to his denial.

“Can you blame her for feeling angry?  You're not the only one who took a risk to save the other.  The young woman flew in onto Snoke’s ship, alone, to save you!” Leia said, impressed.  Even she - princess, general, rebel - who had faced Grand Moff Tarkin and Darth Vader with vivacity and glaring derision was baffled by Rey’s bravery.  “Would you have had the opportunity to dispose of Snoke had she not fearlessly come to you?”

“She was sacrificing for your feeble Resistance… not for me.  Or trying to impress Luke: always trying to impress whichever weak man she's see as a father figure, but denying a man who offers her rule of the galaxy.”  He said, bitterly.

Leia laughed and it surprised him.  He looked up and stared in shock when he saw her there.  Had he really not looked at her this entire time? Why was she…?

Leia continued, ignoring that he was finally looking at her and the traumatized look this action induced.  “Rey attacked Luke because of you.” She said.  “She told me all about your connection.  Told me about your conversations and the touching of fingers.” She smiled, eyeing him playfully.  

He ignored it.  Why was she not clear as Rey had been when they were connected?  Why did she look like… like a ghost?

“Mama…”

“And when Luke interrupted you, she confronted him about trying to kill you.  He tried to walk away from her and she wouldn't allow it.  She knocked him to the ground, fought with him until he conceded and told her the truth.  He did admit to failing you, son.  Your uncle was ashamed of that moment when he thought you'd decided against the light and his reaction to it.  More importantly, Rey knows and she forgives you for everything.  She fought on your behalf, sacrificed on your behalf.  I truly believe she loves you.  Please understand, take it from someone who knows, a lonely life with all the power of the galaxy is nothing compared to a life filled with love.”

“Really mom?” He asked, sarcastically.

She nodded curtly.  “Don't be foolish, Ben.  It's not in your nature.  You come by stubbornness naturally: I have myself to blame for that.  And the impulsive actions, you get from your father, but you only have yourself to blame for your stupid decisions.”

“Nice.” He said, sarcastic still.  That same suppressed smile lingering on his lips.  The brightness in his eyes betrayed him and she smiled, moving closer and wishing she could place her hands on his cheek, but was too late for that.  She would never feel his skin, touch his hair, or hold him in her arms again, but she could visit him now and, as always, she would use every tool in her arsenal to help the Resistance, to serve the galaxy.  It was her life's work, what she'd sacrificed everything, even her son, for and she wouldn't allow that to be squandered if she had hope to help.  

She had been sweet with him this first visit.  It had taken a long time to find him and she could feel her time coming to and end.  She'd been communicating with Luke and even visited Rey, but her son had been difficult to get to and she didn't want to come to him forceful and demanding.  She simply wanted to plant the seed of light within him: to remind him that, although the life of every member of his family had ended and they would never walk the planets again, they existed still and would be with him.  She need to be sure he knew that even though he was the last surviving member of his family, there was still love and light for him and she would not let him forget it.  

“Rey was right, Ben: you're not alone.  Not as long as she is alive.  Let the past die, my angel.  Let go of your hate, forgive yourself, and walk in the light.  It will take time to heal, but she will be there to help you.  Let her love you and eventually you will see the goodness inside yourself.  The power in that light will fulfill you if you give it a chance.”  She pleaded, backing away.  

“Wait! Mom, where are you going?  Why are you…do you…?” He couldn't say it.  The words were in his head, but caught in his throat when he tried to speak them because hearing the words out loud would make it more plausible, somehow.  Why was she translucent?  She looked young like pictures he’d seen from when he was a child.  Why does she look like a ghost?  Had she… died? And worse, had he been the cause?  No.  He would have known.  He would have felt it, but… he frowned, why did he not feel it when she died?

“I must go now, Ben.”

“No! Wait!” He commanded frantically, hating himself for denying the light so completely he hadn’t felt the death of his own mother.

“I love you.” She said and disappeared; her ghostly form floating as if she were tied to a rope, pulling her from him as she faded like smoke in a breeze.

“No.” He breathed, dropping to his knees as tears fell from his eyes.  “No!  I'm not ready for you to go.” He cried, feeling childlike in his appeal, so soft it was like a prayer.

It had been years since he allowed sadness to affect him this way.  He was more likely to destroy this entire ship and everyone on it than to let disappointment cause him tears, but this wasn’t the disappointment in an inferior being or a political failure.  His mother was gone from this world and he’d never wanted her more; to be held in the arms of the one person he knew undoubtedly, somehow, loved him unconditionally.  

“I love you.” He whispered and let the pain wash over him.

“Ben?”  Rey breathed his name so faintly from across the room he nearly mistook the sound for an inconsequential noise from another part of the small ship.  

“Leia.”  He cried softly, the name an explanation for this display.  He looked up and their eyes met for just a moment before she disappeared, but it was enough.  Enough to convince Rey that the hope she held onto for Ben Solo was not in vane.  Leia could not have known Rey would appear in that moment, but her deepest desire was fulfilled when Rey saw Ben, grieving for his mother. 

Rey fell to her bed, her knees too weak to stand, short of breath and eyes filling with tears.  She sniffed and smiled, then cried into her hands. She was confident now, it didn’t matter what anyone said.  She knew better than they did.  It had been difficult with Leia gone, her one ally.  Not one other member of the Resistance shared her ambition to save him and having to suppress her feelings, her love for the man, was a colossal burden.  But she knew it in her heart she could save Ben Solo or at least help him save himself and that was all Rey needed to endure the adversity of the tasks ahead.