#lmao every other week i talk myself out of this crush or whatever is going on with me n this guy

[ban-joey]

sending laser beams to my professor with my mind. kenneth you said midterm grades would b up by this afternoon. it is officially TONIGHT and guess what? kenneth i would love to not be clenching my teeth in my sleep tonight. kenneth i will be sending you a bill in the mail. yes i know its probably a TAs responsibility but i blame you personally. i hate school

[bangcakes]

.

[torturedblue]

It’s the middle of the week, have some dancing turtles

Spoilers below as I gush about my Mutant Mayhem Monday experience 🤗 please feel free to gush with me I wanna hear other people’s thoughts too!

First off… When Seth wanted to put the teenager in TMNT he meant it. Like, all the versions act like teenagers, but like Nickelodeon PG stereotypical teens. MM turtles were the realest PG-13 outta pocket 21st century teenagers I’ve ever seen and I love that shit because it’s the first time I actually felt like I was around the kids in middle school and high school again with the way they talk. Kinda appreciate Superfly cussing too? Like idk it’s Ice Cube and this villain goes hard tryna kill some teenage turtles he formally saw as his lil cousins, let the grown mutant cuss

Also uh, was not expecting to be sad so early in the movie? Like I could tell from the trailers it was gon be an emotional rollercoaster but shit like ten minutes in and these turtles are fuckin depressed. And to see it really hit me because in every other version (except for Bayverse) the turtles literally never let not being part of the human world get to them. In the shows especially they’re so well adjusted and never bothered by sticking to the shadows. Then there’s Rise where they pretty much go out whenever they want and indulge in most of the human world stuff they want to. For these guys to be so stunted and desperate to have more freedom was so heart wrenching. Especially when Splinter grounds them for a whole month and the reality sinks in of how much they know the life they want isn’t an option for them

Wasn’t expecting any kind of ship or romance but that crush Leo has on April hit me like truck because…… holy crap the Leo-April pair has never been a thing? On top of that this is only the second on screen black April we’ve seen and I’ve been a Leo kinnie across the board since day one so to see this combo of my favorite character liking a black girl is making me lose my mind 🥲 and like it got me thinking of several of my favorite shows and the single characters I kin in those and if they’ve ever had black love interests and it’s just still not a common normalized thing honestly.

I’m sure a lot of people aren’t excited for the prospect of ships coming back (especially after 2012 scarred us) but as a Leo lover and black girl it got me so excited to see something like this. I’m just hopeful and optimistic they won’t mess it up like a lot of shows do. The “this is just as friends line” already makes me a little worried bc that trope never has a good history but I have faith they’ll handle things tastefully and not make it toxic or messy

MURDER THE SHREKS!

“I assume you’d wanna be on camera. ‘Cause you have, like a very camera ready look…” OKAY SMOOOOOTH LEONARDOOOOOO 👏🏽

Could not stop laughing while he was shooting his shot my face was literally donnie’s restraining myself from bursting out laughing

Just a couple of my favorite questions that April wrote down for them:

“Do you carry salmonella?” Look I still don’t know wtf salmonella is but it’s the second time a TMNT iteration has joked about it so I’m starting to think it has something specifically to do with turtles 👀

“Have you caught covid?” Oml covid exists in this world

“Are you the source of covid?” OUT OF LINE 💀

“How many people has the red bandana turtle stabbed? Does he need therapy?” Yes.

“Does sunlight cause you to burst into flames?” They’re- they’re not vampires? 😂

Leon Ardo deserves the world and whatever he wants in it give him everything 😭

I will never understand what made Donnie laugh so hard at the name Nardo other than it being because it’s his sibling and that it bothers Leo lmao

All imma say about the puke scene is that I’m glad I heard an “out of context” spoiler about it bc I knew exactly when to look away and I’m glad I did bc the scene lasted for so long??? 😀❓But hey at least I had Unwritten to listen too while I was sparing my eyes 😂

The sequence of them going around and shaking down those gangs and Superfly’s connections. BAD. ASS. And each of them got their own moments to shine? Loved it. Like they each even got to take point and have their moments where they got to kick in the door lol. And the fight scenes were just, muah. Chef’s kiss, they all looked amazing taking grown ass adults down together

Okay Splinter definitely gets the best dad award for putting together that little surprise party, with all the celebrity Chris’s and pretending to wait on them 🥺 so pure. It did make me sad the guys immediately left and you can just see such a sad dejected look on Splinter’s face, knowing he can’t provide what his kids really want or make them happy enough without it 🥲 At the very least they say thanks and that they appreciate but I would’ve at least stayed for a lil bit and gone along with it, Splinter just looked so excited about it and it was so sweet 😭

And he doesn’t even get upset though he knows they’re hiding something, he just says he’ll help them if they’ve gotten into trouble, which is something I’m sure almost every kid has wanted instead of having the kind of relationship where they’re more scared of telling their parents they messed up instead of handling it on their own

I love how musical Superfly’s family is 😂 Ray Filet just starts sing-introducing his name and Mondo and the other couple mutants when they drive with in the car trying to find music they could all sing to together 🥹 not to mention the musical references Superfly makes later that I’ll get to. “Kinda don’t wanna murder everyone on Earth, I just kinda wanna sing” Me too bruh.

Raph immediately going “goochi goochi goo” and playing peekaboo with Genghis frog is so underrated that boy has such a soft side he’s not even that afraid of showing at times, and maybe it’s continuing the trope of Raph having a soft spot for pets/animals? Who knows 😌

Yo I was kinda shook when that government guy knocked Leo out and he just fell unconscious on the ground 😶 Like we’re used to seeing the authorities be brutal especially in movies like this but that’s a whole teenager? You just assaulted a minor? 🙂 Crazy

Also I know it’s sad they got captured and drained painfully but Mikey in that scene was hilarious 😂 like even the way he was dramatically crying and Leo was just started to cry with him like “iM sO sOrRy mIkEeEeEy! 😭” gold. When one of his children is hurting Leo hurts too. One of my favorite moments 🤣

They literally started singing BTS while being tortured they’re so unserious but like in a serious way to them and I love it. Also the fact that they did it just to make Donnie feel better? So pure. Like Raph of all turtles offered to sing while being drained of blood (bc I refuse to use the m word 💀)

The way Splinter snuck in and soloed literal government soldiers single handedly? Badass. Never loved seeing a Splinter save his sons so much 🥹

“But it’s the only way we’ll be accepted.”

“No! We accept you!”

“You can come live with us! We accept you!”

“WE VIBE!”

Oml they’re so puuuuure 😭 I really thought this was gonna be a moment where the guys invite them all to come live with them and Splinter was gonna be like ‘aha 😬 whoa slow down there’ but damn nah he was just as enthusiastic as them inviting all those mutants to come live in their home forever “The more the merrier!” Like ugh he just loves finding family like Baxter Stockman and we see where the guys got their loving nature from 🥹

The amount of his soul Mikey put into that BROSEEEPH was so real like I’ve never heard the name broseph be said in any other way, I’m so glad they put that moment in there

“New York, New York!” “I’m the king of New York!”

Oml superfly’s a Broadway baby 🤗 he’s a big bad villain marching through time square and talking about King Kong but he’s fill gonna nerd out and make his musical theatre references 😂

“For once in your life you didn’t sound lame. You actually started to sound like a leader”

“That was really heartfelt Raph”

I love the Leo Raph dynamic in this movie. Like they don’t always agree or understand each other but they will show love towards one another and show mutual appreciation

Something about any of the turtles shells cracking always gets to me for some reason like those are some serious permanent injuries so I want to see if they do anything special with that in the sequel or show maybe ��� And I couldn’t tell if all of theirs cracked or just one, and if so which turtle it was. I think Leo or Raph. I feel like it was Leo but Raph’s are also starting to have a trend of getting cracks in their shells so 🤷🏽‍♀️

Also I do not want to judge what other people like to wear but why are Raph and Donnie the only normal dressed ones 😭 like Mikey looks like he’s going on vacation and Leo looks like he’s going to clock in at Best Buy 😂 tell me it’s because they have limited resources for clothes lmao. HE’S LITERALLY WEARING A LANYARD

Them taking off the masks was crazy honestly… like them deciding not to wear them made my brain pause until I realize they’re kids going to school now and not being ninjas all the time… they don’t need them anymore. I’m just so pleased with the fact that this movie was willing to do what all other iterations weren’t. I see why they’re getting a sequel and show already, these guys and the plot development deserve so much more exploration

Maybe I missed something in the beginning but I’m wondering where Stockman went. Like is he still in custody? Did he die? Because not seeing him again that’s what I assumed but we only saw him get arrested or whatever, so if anything I don’t get why Superfly and the others wouldn’t try to break him out 🤔 I was surprised they didn’t make him a villain though, but I’m pretty happy about him getting to be a more optimistic kind character tho

SHREDDER HAD ME SHOOK LIKE THE ARMOR ALREADY LOOKED SO COOL AND I WAS NOT EXPECTING THEM TO GET THE BIG BAD INVOLVED AHHHH I’M SO READY TO SEE THEM REACT TO THIS ANGRY GIANT TIN CAN

Although I do wonder if Shredder’s gonna have some personal gripe with them since they have a different backstory he doesn’t seem to be a part of. And shit now that they’re public and in school it’s gonna be so much easier for him to go after them 😅 pluses and minuses…

The soundtrack: golden. Cultured. Nothing but range. Goes from a 90’s rap song to Natasha Bedingfield’s soulful 2000’s song. Most movies only ever have all pop mainstream songs or only rap songs because they think they can’t mix but MM does it effortlessly. The turtles are so versatile not just with music genres but they make old and new references ‘cause they’re well rounded kings 💪🏽 Between rizz, Adele, broski, Hey Arnold, K-Pop, Ferris Bueller, etc… I mean Donnie’s literally doing the sprinkler and the funky chicken in that gif up top 😂 they’re born in 2008 I doubt any kids today know about those dances anymore

Clearly I have all the thoughts and feelings about these boys and the movie, but I think this is probably my favorite TMNT movie? I’ve loved all of them but I think this one definitely brings me the most comfort fr

[moonjxsung]

omg everyone’s ex story have got me with my jaw DROPPED (!!!)

but lol, if y’all don’t mind i gotta trash talk my ex too bc he makes me laugh lol. SO 👏 my entire life i had mostly been interested in girls (i’m afab) but i had this guy best friend since high school that was crushing on me hardcore the entire time and i knew, but i was just never interested in guys so i just kinda looked the other way lmao. but anyway, i loved him so much and he was the only person i had ever opened up to completely. like every traumatic thing that had ever happened to me? he 100% knew about it.

so anyway, fast forward to college and we start spending a lot more time together and i was frequently stealing his bed at the dorms because my roommate wasn’t a good person and at some point i realized that i might also be having feelings for him too and i was very confused because again, i mostly liked girls and only ever made an effort with girls. but hey whatever, i tried to play it cool but one night we took shrooms together and we ended up having some VERY emotionally invested sex lmao

THEN we started dating after that and i shit you not, we only lasted a MONTH. the thing was that we had a friend in common who lived like three houses away from campus and we often visited her there and she hosted a lot of parties. one day i couldn’t reach him at all, so i contacted his roommate and he said that they were tripping together alone at her house and i was like ??? excuse me??? so i basically flew over there and they were making out on her couch

when i tell you i was LIVID. ohh i was pissed.

i then found out that out of the four weeks we dated, they’d been a thing for three 🙃

this asshole, who had been my best friend since high school, to whom i’d shared e v e r y t h i n g about me to, who’d been chasing me since the beginning and was still chasing me in college started cheating with our friend the moment he pulled me lmfao and made me look SO stupid every time we visited her at her place because ALSO EVERYONE knew except for me 🙃🙃🙃

-🪲

HUH????? HELLO?????????? DID I READ THIS CORRECTLY 😧😧😧😧 no fr what IS IT with men who are so persistent at chasing after you… AND THEN THEY FUCKING CHEAT ON YOU….. like colossal waste of everyone’s time and makes you feel so fucking stupid 😭 4 weeks is crazy and 3 weeks of those being with a whole other person is crazier 😭😭😭😭 might be a stupid question but do you guys still talk at all?? I feel like I’d have to cut him off for the rest of my life I deadass could not deal with that knowledge 🤕 I tried breaking up with my ex the first time he started playing games and he would not stop texting me in the middle of the night and calling to apologize and begging me to stay and he was so drunk when I answered so I felt bad and took him back and he literally started seeking out other girls like a week later and then cheated on me maybe 3 months after that. Fucking waste of my time scum garbage human fr I was going insane trying to piece together who he was cheating on me with and everyone called me crazy and I was right about every single thing in the end. I needed so much therapy I dyed my hair red my eating disorder got so bad I fr was never the same and I can’t bring myself to date again 😭 I’m so sorry that happened to you anon you deserve so so so much better and I hope you never get your time wasted like that again ☹️🫶 I love you and I’m always here if you need to vent !! 🩷🫶

[baladric]

What first got you into writing? How did you develop your style? And have you got any tips for other budding writers out there? Also who are your favourite authors and poets?

this got LONG but i'm going to tell myself you were ASKING FOR THAT and take a breath a;ldfkjwo;dfjsf

i can't remember if my inuyasha self-insert fic days predated my gaiaonline roleplaying days, but it was one of the two! definitely entirely a form of escape from a very painful and lonely life, but i think it was actually several years after i started definitionally Writing™ before i got into it, you know? i don't remember what kickstarted it, but somewhere along the way, i realized that i could really do whatever i wanted to, and i discovered figurative language and non-linear storytelling really went hogwild on some super niche death note fics ;alkfjwd and from there i started writing prose-poetry and really just. splashing around in there. i've been a musician my whole life, and it was like i'd realized that i could put music into the written word, like i wrote entirely for the way things tripped off my internal ear—like this one line from a poem i wrote when i was 14 still sticks with me, Leaves stain, leaves stains (rough obviously, but it was my first foray into writing about visual imagery that stuck in my sad little head)

my style started as its own nascent messy little thing, and like. man, people on here don't talk about Lolita because. you know. it's literally the apotheosis of the stuff that gets people wound-up in fandom spaces? literally a novel about SA and pedophilia and grooming—but the thing is, there's a reason it's considered a central part of the western literary canon, and that book revolutionized me as a writer. nabokov's entire thing really is just. ear-worms as text, like i cannot even express how often i still think "I am just winking happy thoughts into a little tiddle cup", or how many times i'll echolalia my way through this one line from the intro bit of the book: "Lo-Le-Ta: The tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth." take or leave the content of the book, nabokov does it like none other—or he did until ocean vuong published On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous, which is just. idk if you haven't read it, please please please, do yourself a favor and make space for it. it's the most effecting book i've ever read, as well as the most gorgeous and the most lovingly, grievingly composed.

You once told me that the human eye is god's loneliest creation. How so much of the world passes through the pupil and still it holds nothing. The eye, alone in its socket, doesn't even know there's another one, just like it, an inch away, just as hugry, as empty. Opening the front door to the first snowfall of my life, you whispered, "Look."

if i can ever write a single sentence that pins the wide universe and the complex sorrow and joy of the human experience in place the way ocean vuong does, i will die happy. honestly.

favorite authors/poets is in vein with that last bit, but the short list anyway:

ocean vuong, esp On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous (novel) and Time is a Mother (poetry)

maggie stiefvater, specifically The Raven Cycle—i could (and have) gone on for hours about the way she puts her readers into a tactile, vivid world, and her singular skill for spinning characters so contradictory and multifaceted that, to my mind, they're whole entire people, instead of the archetypes or loving stereotypes of most other fiction

richard siken, for Crush, which. i mean, i'm a gay man obsessed with words, this one really goes without saying lmao, if you read nothing else from it, read Snow and Dirty Rain. it is my gospel and my lifeblood, i have it memorized and still i reread it every week.

katherine addison taught me so much about storytelling, unreliable narrators, and the complexities of healing/trauma recovery while contending with rigid society (tragically pertinent to our present lives)—her Chronicles of Osreth (comprised of The Goblin Emperor, Witness for the Dead and The Grief of Stones)

maggie nelson, both for Bluets and The Argonauts

becky chambers—Psalm for the Wild-Built altered me as a person, it is gorgeous and soaring and humble and such a necessary book

donna tartt, obviously

anne carson, also obviously

freya marske—will read anything she ever writes, her language is lush, her worldbuilding is unique and spectacular, and her smut is HOT

alexandra rowland, for the same reasons as freya marske, but also their characters are so stunningly sympathetic, as well as really loving examples of neurodivergence in fiction (evemer hoşkadem, my deeply autistic beloved)

robin hobb really writes a toxic, complicated relationship saga like none other, i am stunningly enraged by Realm of the Edlerlings and also am physically incapable of not thinking about it constantly

and then there's the authors who taught me about magic: Garth Nix (The Old Kingdom Series), Holly Black (Modern Faerie Tales), Tamora Pierce (Protector of the Small), and Francesca Lia Block (Weetzie Bat)

writer tips!!!!!! this is hokey, but honestly my main advice is READ and also HAVE FUN. storytelling is the oldest human act, and language is the show where everything's made-up and the points don't matter. language is a sandbox, and it's there for you to literally just fuck around in. it can be whatever you want—it can be your raison d'être as a writer, but also it can be incidental. it can be a means to an end, economical, and some of the best stories are taken with that approach. but also you can paint with language, if you want to. you can compose music with it. you can do whatever suits your fancy.

my second tip is WORD COUNT DOESN'T MATTER. stop counting. stop stop stop holding yourself to the weird, quantity-obsessed writer culture. 2,000 words a day? nobody has time for that except full-time writers or those really rare writers who blink and 5k words fall onto the page. personally, if i'm sitting down to write and i'm really determined to actually get something onto the page, whether or not it's necessarily good, i'll force out 200 words. 200! i can't remember where i got this tip, but the point of that number is that 200 words is attainable even on the most blocked day, and by the time you hit your 200th word, you're gonna be in the middle of a sentence or a thought that you'll have to finish, and you end up with 300. or you hit 200 and you've broken through the fog and warmed up to it, and you leave with 700 or 1,500 (or a couple wild times for me, 5k).

my third tip: if you're a writer, EVERYTHING IS WRITING. this goes for art, music, literally any creative pursuit. walking out your door in the morning is writing, because you're learning things about the world, you're processing stimuli, your wheels are never not spinning. every video game you play, every show you watch, every fic you read is inherently a generative act, because that story is entering your store of knowledge to be processed and synthesized and lend you inspiration for the kinds of stories you want to tell, or the characters you want to make, or even the kinds of things you want to avoid as a creator. i can't tell you how much i've learned from games (Outer Wilds, i'm lookin at you!!) or tv (Station Eleven....) or music (Joanna Newsom really should be on my list of authors) or fanfiction (if you're a goblin emperor beastie and you haven't read celebros's Blackbird series, RUN, don't walk. i learned literally everything about creating character conflict within a framework of love that really motivates characters to work at it and not just get angry and walk away, and i remain uhhHHH fuckin Gobsmacked and reeling that she wants to write with ME a;lkdjfalw;dfs also literally one of my most formative collaborative and creative experiences came from reading kingdom hearts fanfiction in 2010, so) so!!!! just live your life!!! think about what makes you tick, what makes stories tick, think about the stars or birds or the history of glassblowing, whatever lights you up, and that energy will find its way into the things you make.

oh and also NEVER FEEL BAD FOR TAKING BREAKS. and i don't mean a 5-minute break, or a few days. i mean weeks. i mean months or years or what-have-you. sometimes it's just not there, and that's not a failing. your creations aren't content, they're little critters you make with love, and you can't love a thing you're banging your head against day and night. take breaks. allow yourself ebbs and flows in your creativity. everything hibernates, and i promise it'll wake up again and it'll be better than you left it.

end point: i Love You, and if you're writing or hoping to write or planning to write, i love your writing, too, nascent or tangible.

[salemruinseverything]

if your fucking blog is blank i'm blocking you and reporting you for spam i don't give a fuck give me one [1] sign you are an actual human being first

[don't worry, the mile long description is staying, that's my only accomplishment on this site aside from april 13, 2007, brobecks bmonday, and ferb time]

[i'm also liveblogging homestuck intermittently, go here [browser only] for a nice little organized archive. unlike everything else on tumblr it works better on mobile browser, my desktop theme doesn't like long posts]

hi, welcome to salemruinseverything dot tumble, your source for quality reblogs, horrible [affectionate] original posts, and frequent tøp-posting of varying quality [read: reblogging half of what's in the tag every time lore happens]. my name's salem. [mainly.] i use they/them, xe/xem, joy/joyr, ae/aer, it/its, and 🍭/🍭s pronouns [also mainly, you can check my pronouny for more of both of those.] [also, i do sometimes use he/him or she/her for myself, but id prefer if other people didn't.] this is mostly a bandom/shitposting blog, but i have been known to post about politics, animatronics, and doll collecting very frequently. i once got someone to ask dallon weekes if he knew what furries were, and that is both my biggest accomplishment and the worst thing i've ever done. my only personality traits are being personally victimized by pete wentz, having a crush on gerard way, surviving solely on monster energy and spite, and being a kinnie which i refuse to be ashamed about anymore. i have a lot of ocs. feel free to read on if you want to know anything else but that's really all the info you need.

dni if: you're a queerphobe, an ace/aro exclusionist, anti-xenogenders/neopronouns, a terf/swerf, a pedo/map/nomap/anti-anti/whatever you guys are calling yourselves now, anti-kin of any sort, you actively support brendon urie or melanie martinez, preps/posers /mj [this list will also get amended at some point it's like 2 am as i write this] [also fair warning that this isn't an exhaustive list and i hardblock without hesitation if your vibes are off. no hard feelings unless you're a bigot]

hey if we're mutuals/i follow you please tag these w/ "salem dont look" [you absolutely don't have to but id appreciate it]: any photos of actual needles [talk of needles/cartoon needles are fine], minimalist aesthetics [especially in black and white], death from overdoses [other varieties of death are fine im emo & desensitized [mostly]], the names morgan & chey, any photos of posessed ybc!patrick, & agere stuff [i have nothing against y'all and you're very welcome here, but it's a big squick for me lmao]

a short list of things i post about [formerly a list of things i actively post about, but half of these fandoms are dead now and i'm too lazy to take them out]

my chemical romance

various decaydance bands

hating brendon urie

twenty øne piløts[? in my 2024? it's more likely than you think.]

i DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

the aforementioned bamd secretly being catboys

waterparks [the band]

sanders sides

various mcyts/associated streamers

homestuck[? in my 2024? it's m-]

tally hall. how did i forget tally hall.

brian david gilbert [& associated acts]

particularly polygon but i can no longer count that as an associated act

the heart rate of a mouse [i apologize in advance]

will wood, with or without the tapeworms

lalaloopsy [where is lalaloopsy tumblr. please]

american girl

some other general doll collecting stuff as well, but i do mainly collect the two mentioned above [mostly lalaloopsies. lalaloopsy fans please interact]

showbiz pizza/the rockafire explosion[/chuck e cheese occasionally]

disney parks [i hate the corporation but i am a sucker for a good dark ride]

i haven't seen a single episode of supernatural since i was 9 and have never played tf2 but castiel and scout are my special little guys so i post about them sometimes

this list will probably be changed at some point by the way this is just off the top of my head

tags i use:

#salem's random thoughts: any original textposts i make

#salem's shitposting at midnight again: my old textpost tag, is now mainly used for memes if at all

#top 10 gerard way gf moments: you know how i said one of my only personality traits was having a crush on gerard way? yeah

#salem please stop talking about your kandi: a catchall tag for any posts i make talking about/with pictures of my kandi

#awsten knight troll propaganda: hey did you know that awsten knight is a valid troll name? and that him typing in all caps all the time could technically be counted as a typing quirk? yeah [the tag that inevitably led to parxstuck]

#tally hall out boy cinematic universe: a mostly abandoned project wherein i tried to connect everything possible to tally hall and/or fall out boy

#salems selfies: this is just pictures of my face

#you're a hot mess and i'm falling for queue: uh. queue tag. yeah. mostly used when i hit post limit but sometimes i schedule things

#salems im okay liveblog: on the rare occasions my favorite webcomic, i'm okay (trust me), updates i am bound to liveblog the new episode so if you dont care about it then block that cause I Have Emotions About These Dumb Emo Teens

#salem answers a question: tag for asks

#my friends!!: things my friends post!

#seven of spiders: tag for my band!! it's mostly an actual band now!! we still don't have a drummer though

#salem's discography liveblogs: there were a lot of bands i was avoiding getting into just because i didn't know when or how to start with their music, so i now have a list of said bands and i've been going down the list, picking a band and listening to one of their albums until i finish their whole discography. used to be on sundays but i kind of just do them whenever i feel like it now. i also have individual tags for each band but you can find those by going through the tag. current tags to block if you don't wanna see this: #salems gorillaz liveblog, #paramore discography liveblog [my blacklist tags for this are inconsistent im sorry]

#vampireposting & #idogposting: i like vampires & idogs. self explanatory.

#salems ocs, #the murder crew, #dsmpjoys au, #parxstuck, #my chemical l'manberg au, & #the reprisians: stuff abt my ocs/aus! [please send me asks about them pls pls p] [note because i don't know where else to put it; dsmpjoys & mcl are on indefinite hiatus o7]

#every day i have strange sentences (?) put into my ask box by tumblr user full of teeth: dumb shit [affectionate] that everest sends me. still using his url from two urls ago because i'm lazy.

#liveblogging my breakdown: the posts that get a little too venty lmao, feel free to block if you don't wanna see that shit

#ftwwwposting: mcr play ftwww live challenge

this will also be updated cause i Know this isnt all the tags i use on a regular basis

other things i think are important to note:

all my posts are ok to rb unless they're specifically tagged w don't rb [although i guess this isn't much of an issue now that i can turn off reblogs but. still]

i don't actually ship any real people [at least not anymore- i sincerely apologise if you scroll down far enough to find unironic rpf-posting], but i do make a concerning amount of rpf jokes and am a throamie, and i try to tag any rpf-related content accordingly [i swear i'm posting about peterick in a platonic way i swear it on my life it's not my fault bandom has not caught onto the concept of duo names]

ask me to tag things if you need me to! it doesn't matter how "dumb" you think it is, i will try my hardest to tag it

the only thing i won't tag is blood, because i'm an mcr fan and that shit's so prevalent in this fandom that i don't even wanna try- however, i do tag gore, & i only rb cartoony/artistic gore, no realistic stuff :p

on that note let me know if i miss any tags so i can add them! [i do forget to tag things excruciatingly often, i'm sorry for that]

also on that note since people keep asking: i put tws on fall out boy/panic! at the disco because people asked me to [i don't anymore because i'm like 80% sure they both unfollowed me but. if you see older posts with those tws that's why]

ALSO on that note. i reblog so much mcyt stuff that it's basically impossible to tag it all at this point so like genuinely no offense but if you need that blacklisted please just unfollow stop harassing me to tag it

all the tw/cw tags i use are formatted "tw/cw [thing]", & mentions of that thing are tagged "tw/cw [thing] mention". i often forget which things i use cw tags for and which i use tw tags for so id recommend blocking both to protect yourself from my stupidity

please send me asks. i crave human interaction

i block people a lot, don't @ me- this is my space and i'm curating it how i want. literally, if you give me weird [in a bad way] enough vibes from a quick scroll through your blog after you follow me, i'm blocking you.

if you're not around my age [i am very young! mid teens! im not comfortable sharing specifics but if you're like. under legal tumblr age/above 18 this applies to u], please don't message me if we haven't talked before, it makes me uncomfortable [you're welcome to follow, just don't dm me please] [this also doesn't apply if we've already talked a few times outside of dms]

i threaten to stab people a lot. please know that i'm joking

my sideblogs: [ironically only three of these aren't related to my ocs]

@mediocreincorrectquotes: incorrect quotes of various fandoms

@sevenofspiders: blog for my band :p

@salems-edits: feel like the url sums that one up

@terribleocincorrectquotes: incorrect quotes of my ocs, horribly organized

@ooc-tiktok-comments: the uh. the url sums it up

@cottoncandy-system: system blog (hi we have osdd. apparently)

@bimbemo: aesthetic sideblog (HUGE flashing lights & eyestrain cw)

@its-just-ray-toro: its just ray toro. follow for ray toro on your dash

@bunnyboylyricbot: lyrics i like posted twice daily

all of the sideblogs below are semi-rp, semi-aesthetic blogs for my ocs all of which are very inactive

@alluwantizbadboys - gabe kennedy

@sharpeasaknife - helena sharpe

@christmasknight - noelle knight

@thearistocrat - cain harmony

@mxs1n1st3r - celine sinister

@frmthrzr2thrzry - aaron knight

@b3aut1ful--quarant1n3 - razz roscoe

@voluntaryv1ct1m - jaxxie boyd

@began-and-ended-in-ellipses - cas roscoe

i also have a few secret sideblogs. you'll have to find them yourself

also i am now forcing you to look at these pictures of ryan ross.

[Image ID: several assorted photos of Ryan Ross. /end ID]

that's it thank you have a good day

[ndiecity]

idk ur still doing the confessions thing but anyway. it's not really wild or anything, i just needed to get it off my chest lol (you can ignore this if you want this gets pretty long and confusing i think so buckle up)

also shoutout to the 6th grade anon, i had a similar 6th grade exp. middle schoolers are the worst. i literally had little no friend AND was bullied lol.

anyway there was this one girl in my class that was like a sorta popular girl i was friends with. so during 6th grade, i had no friends except for her (i dont think she saw me as a friend tho or were even friends in the first place?? idk) and i would always crave her attention. i didn't know i had a crush on her i think.

(side note: i would rate the girls in my class based on how pretty and nice to me they are, (i think i put her on 2nd lol))

so then whenever she was absent for the day i would feel sad and all that shit. whenever she was around i always do anything to please her or make her think im cool or something (i was not cool, i was a loser). we would talk endlessly on messenger, talking abt random shit, how shitty her mom was, how shitty my mom was etc. one time during our first class for the day (which was about 5am i think) she was acting weird, i asked her about it, she said her stomach hurt. so me, being all lovesick and shit gave her my lunch ( i didn't have lunch money and only had sandwiches lol) when she thanked me for it, and said she felt better, i felt so proud. idk i just felt so happy then

fast forward to end of 6th grade, we were graduating. by that i mean transitioning from 6th grade to 7th grade. anyway. so we graduated, kept in touch, still messaged her on messenger, and then school got in the way and my phone got taken away cuz i failed sum classes in the 2nd quarter. never had it back since. so we didnt talk for about 4 years.

so back in 2020, my parents got me a laptop for school, and i made a new mess. acc. i reached out to her again. we talked, talked abt shitty moms, i found out she's bi and i told her im a lesbian. after a few days i asked her if she'd ever had a gf or bf or whatever (like the idiot i was) and said she didnt have to answer if she didnt want to obvi. she said yes she's had bf's before. i said, cool. then she asked me why i was asking i told her i was just curious.

then came out of nowhere, she said, "wanna try?" so then my brain shut off and i didnt reply for minutes then she just sent a "haha"

and she was like, "oh sorry was that weird? sorry😬"

but i said it was fine and shit. we didnt talk about it for about a day.

then we were talking again and i was like, "so this is gonna sound weird but do you ever like, like someone and would want a romantic relationship with them but wouldn't like, mind being their friend instead? like youre in the middle?"

and she said "yeah, i have" so then i was like "oh cool, cool"

then she asked, "why? have you?" and i said yes.

then she asked who. and my brain shut off again lmaoo so i was just like "you" the speech bubble appeared multiple times lmao then i followed up with like, "sorry! that was weird! please just forget about it!"

then she was like, "no no, it's fine. i feel the same way" (and i beliived it. how naive was i?)

so then i was like, "really?? cool cool cool" (im a really awkward person okay)

then after a few minutes of talking again (you know when you're like flirting as a joke but then it's not a joke anymore? lol) she was like, "so wanna be my gf?"

my brain shut off again. i didnt answer for a few minutes cuz my brain was dead. then she was like, "um was that too fast? that was too fast sorryy"

by the time i read that my hand was shaking lmaoo (from nervousness or shock i dont know) so i hastily replied with, "nah its fine. i would love too" after overthinking it and shit

does dating count when your just talking over text? what is dating????

anyway we flirt a lot, saying goodnight, i love you's and shit. she said i was her first gf, i said she was my first relationship and what not. i was genuinely happy. i had a person who understood me, and liked me, and i was happy. she even said she saved my bday on her phone

so then like about a week and a before my bday was when shits started to go down.

i messaged her, said a quick goodmorning cuz i had classes and how i wanted to kill myself and shit like that (dont worry, im not actively suicidal and she already knew this) she replied and i quote "Good morning, love. I love you."

then like after classes, i messaged her, asked how her day was, told her about my day etc. i waited about an hour. (she doesnt typically reply for about 10 - 15 minutes cuz duh she does have a more eventful life than mine) so i thought none of it. thought she was just busy. so it was nighttime and still no word from her. so i said good night and wished for her to be safe.

morning came, i checked my messages, still nothing, she didnt even see it yet. i went on with my day thinking nothing of it. told myself she might have some problems at home and all that. by the 3rd day, i was pretty anxious and i couldnt think properly. my brain conjuring up scenarios where her mom found out, and her phone got taken away. anything just to convince myself what the dreaded truth was.

it was the 5th day was when i gave up. i saw she changed her pfp, and captioned it like she would normally caption it. replied to the comments, that kind of shit. so then i was so mad by then so i commented too. ofc she didnt reply. i spent days worrying over her safety, when in reality she's just an asshole. and i really thought she really like me you know? i really thought she'd at least considered me as her friend, i guess not

my bday came, we had a party but i wasn't really feeling it ya know? by then i'd already spent the past week crying myself to sleep. no one noticed a thing.

a few months ago i saw she had a bf, and by that time i already felt like my old self again, no longer the broken pathetic shell she left. i was back to square one. so i cried again.

present day, i still see her posts, her ig stories, (i dont think she blocked me). and i cant bring myself to block her either. like idk on one hand i'm so mad that she just left me hanging, that her relationship with her new bf lasted longer than we were together and on the other i knew if she ever reached out again, i would latch on to every inch of her. (that's probably bad lol)

anyway have a nice day/afternoon/night!!!! i hope i havent troubled you too much lol sorry!

Damn that's a lot to take in, I'm sorry 😔

[clearsky]

My Top Comfort Characters/Kins and My Main HCs For Them

(Note, not all my kins/comfort characters are on here, just the ones I have more than 5 hcs for)

CW: Korekiyo Shinguji (DRV3), Himiko Yumeno (DRV3), Shinsou Hitoshi (BNHA), Kyoko Kirigiri (THH), Tsuyu Asui (BNHA), Entrapta (Spop), Ibuki Mioda (SDR2), Celestia Ludenberg (THH), Funtime Foxy (FNAF), Peril (WOF)

Korekiyo Shinguji (DRV3)

Nonbinary

He/They pronouns

Autistic

Chains and loose accessories are for stimming

Likes the feeling of silk and cotton

Can't stand the feeling of anything rough or bumpy

He likes collecting small trinkets and the bones of small mammals

Can't stand anything salty. He'll eat it but he certainly won't enjoy it

Dating Rantaro

Can flirt, but only if he doesn't try

Petnames are a hell yea

Gets sunburnt really easily

Group dates with Celesnaegiri and Ikuzono

Can't cook for s h i t

Had a scene kid phase in middle school

Went to the same middle school as Celeste and Maki

Knew them when Celeste went through her "I'm not like other girls" phase and Maki was a Band Kid™

Himiko Yumeno (DRV3)

Female

She/Her pronouns

Lesbian

Can force herself to fall asleep within seconds regardless of where she is

100% forces herself to fall asleep when she doesn't wanna listen/talk to someone

Himiko/Angie/Tenko relationship. I'm calling them the Traffic Light Trio

She likes taking naps in the forest

She prefers enclosed/tight spaces more than open ones

Has several hundred stress balls and squishies laying around

She overheats easy

Shinsou Hitoshi (BNHA)

Questioning his gender, but goes by any pronouns

Knows he's Asexual, at least

Has no clue what his romantic orientation is though

The kind of person to carry treats in his pocket just in case he runs into a cat

Will stop to pet literally every cat he comes across

Great at reading people

Doesn't talk unless it's 100% needed

Hangs with Tokoyami, Jirou, and Denki most often

Aizawa has 100% unofficially adopted him

Fosters kittens

Not a big fan of physical touch

He is 100% in the bakusquad. Anyone who says he's in the Dekusquad is a c o w a r d

He and Tsuyu vibe

Knows a bunch of random facts

Dark humour? Dark humour

*skates backwards into his therapist's room slowly sipping from an absurdly huge cup of coffee* Candice you're not gonna BELIEVE the shit I just went through

In case I forgot to mention it, he skates

Kyoko Kirigiri (THH)

Mtf

She/Her

Bi with female preference

Burns go up to her shoulders/collarbone/chest

Prefers to just listen as opposed to saying anything

Knows a ton of random trivia about everyone else in her class

She keeps a notebook she fills with all the trivia

Doesn't celebrate her birthday. She just doesn't see the point of it

Doesn't hate sugar/sweets, but if given the choice she would choose literally everything else

Cuts her own hair

A cat person

Permanent dark circles

T-Tall 😳

Like,,, 6'1 at LEAST

Only person taller than her is Yasuhiro (6'3)

Canon no longer exist

Ahahaha healthy life habits? What are those?

Can't handle horror games

She's the kind of person you'd go to if you needed to rant but didn't want any advice

Polyamourous yo

Celeste/Kyoko/Makoto

She's a dom yall are just scared to admit it

Tsuyu Asui (BNHA)

They go by They/Them

Lesbian

They and Ochaco are dating

They like to hang with Shinsou

Which mainly just means the two sitting in one of their dorms in near total silence doing whatever

Can speak English and French as well as Japanese

Learned English from cartoons

Picked up French bc they thought it'd be fun

Prefers to stay neutral in the whole Bakusquad / Dekusquad thing

They're invited to all outings/events by/for both squads

They like puns

They're a dumbass but willingly, and for fun

Like "someone says they like dark humour and they'll turn off the lights before telling a joke" kind dumbass for fun

Great at poker

Likes Disney Movies

Very touchy once you get close enough

Not in a sexual way, just likes physical contact

Especially fond of piggyback rides and cuddles

Extreme fear of needles

Entrapta (She-Ra)

She/Her or It/Its

Doesn't bother trying to figure out whether she's cis, trans, nonbinary, or what

Was AMAB though

Short as fuck (4'7)

Strong as fuck though

Cuddle game strong

Physical touch is a fuck yes

Cuddles

Piggyback rides

Hugs

Anything where she's touching someone is wonderful in her book

As long as she's the one that initiates it

Anyone else touching her without her permission makes her freak

Prefers being high up

Makes it harder for anyone to sneak up on her

An ace at video games

When it comes to sexuality she just says she's Questioning

Ibuki Mioda (SDR2)

Any pronouns + Pup/Pupself + It/Its

No idea what their gender is otherwise

Biromantic Asexual

Just likes sexual jokes

Gets distracted easily

Has severe hearing problems

She's plays her instruments as loud as possible, with the amp right next to her, without ANY ear protection

It's caused some damage

She talks so loud bc she has no idea how loud is considered acceptable

Wears hearings aids most of the time

Several piercings and tattoos

Likes hearing things jingle

She has a bracelet with a few bells hanging from it

She'll shake it whenever she's bored

LOVES hair accessories

Ribbons are a particular favourite

Occasionally she'll hang little charms from her hair "horns"

The kind of person who never takes any pills/medicine bc she keeps forgetting she has to

Frequently uses emojis

Skates everywhere but she isn't very good at it

She keeps crashing into everything

Has broken every bone in her body at least 3 times

Most of which was bc she keeps trying to kick in doors and skating down the stairs

Celestia Ludenberg (THH)

Nonbinary

Any pronouns, mainly goes by She/They

Bi, 70:30

Collects mini hand sanitizers and can tabs

Has single handedly gotten Mario Kart, Mario Party, Monopoly, Uno, and Clue banned a grand total of 17 times (and counting)

The kind of person to purposefully target someone regardless of what game was being played

Favourite victim is Byakuya (bc he gets so upset about it and she finds that hilarious)

Mains Waluigi

Celeste/Kyoko/Makoto

Has several banned Twitter accounts bc whenever she's bored she'll start discourse on purpose

Hangs with Korekiyo, Ibuki, Byakuya, Yasuhiro, and Leon most often

It's a weird friend group but everyone's sorta gotten used to it

She and Byakuya gamble together occasionally

She tries to avoid it bc he'll willingly blow his entire fortune in an attempt to beat her

Autustic

Can't stand the feeling of water

Mainly bc she can't swim for shit

Horror movies? Hates them

Gets flustered super easily

Taka is her twin brother

Kotoko, Kokichi, and Gundham are their half siblings (Same father)

Peko and Toko are their cousins

She sucks ass at go fish

Fuck canon she's 4'11 now

C h u b b y

Freckles

Once she gets comfortable enough with herself she dyes her hair in the peekaboo style

Either black and red or black and blonde

Haven't decided yet

I'll be doing Celesnaegiri hcs as a seperate post but I just feel it's important for you to know that she expresses her affection verbally and is a very touchy person

Went to middle school with Maki and Korekiyo

Has horrible eyesight

She wears contacts most of the time but she always puts off buying more

After the 5th or so time she ended up blindly stumbling around a week after her contacts ran out Kyoko convinced her to buy glasses as well

Religious accessories yo

Like chokers and dangly earrings with crosses and pentagrams and shit

Likes wearing wacky earrings

Can run and do all sorts of tricks in heels

She and Mukuro are exes yo

Keeps her hair short so it's easier to manage

Hair never gets longer than her shoulders if she can help it

She seems like the kind of person who'd keep her bangs grown past her eyes regardless of how frustrating or inconvenient it is

She's a sub yall just don't wanna admit it

Funtime Foxy (FNAF)

I'm going on the record to say this

Funtime Foxy is genderfluid and that is that

Goes by Funtime

Any pronouns, They/Them most commonly

Plays music (keyboard and guitar mainly)

They and Funtime Freddy (Freds) mainly play with the kids

Freds mainly tells stories with Bonbon while Funtime more so plays one-on-one

Has nicknames for everyone

Circus Baby - Ringleader

Ballora - Bells

Funtime Freddy - Partner

Bon Bon - Bun

Peril (WOF)

I like both Nonbinary She/They Peril and Mtf She/Her Peril

They're both such good concepts

She's a lesbian, Harold

She only had a crush on Clay bc he was pretty much everything she was supposed to like in a guy

Gimme a moment while I force all my mental disorders onto this poor child

Autistic, Anxiety (Social anxiety, mainly, but she has most types), Adhd, PTSD

I'd like to reiterate yet again that She's a lesbian

Sunny and Glory were her gay awakening

Peril in Book 1: Damn, Sunny and Glory sure are pretty. Anyone would be lucky to date them. Clay would probably go for them over me. He would be stupid if he didn't. I myself would willingly date them over someone like me. They're just so pretty :(

Peril waking up in a cold sweat in the middle of arc 2: WAIT-

Rarepair alert but Peril/Sora

Peril meeting Sora: "Hmmm She's attractive. I would love to date her. Too bad I'm straight and in love with her brother lmao :P"

Peril, a mere month later, waiting for Ruby to leave Jade Mountain, pacing in her cave, running face first into a wall: WAIT-

I remember reading this one amazing story where Sora taught Peril to read/write and Peril found out she set off the bomb and comforted her/convinced her her run so that's canon now

Btw if anyone can remember what that story was called/what platform it was on and could tell me I'd appreciate it very much

I'd even be willing to draw a character of your's or make you an icon or something

I usually don't accept requests bc I get burnt out easy but this is a special case

She runs into Sora again sometime between the beginning of TOP and the end

I like to imagine she just goes wandering around

Anyway she confesses like a mere few minutes after running into her again bc Peril is just subtle like that

The actual confession takes 15 minutes and the entire time Sora is just sitting here like "👁👄👁 sure"

Bam Peril/Sora

Peril plans to keep it a secret for a little while longer but she spends 3 seconds around Clay and pretty much blurts it out

Clay, who wasn't even aware that Peril was a lesbian, is just "👁👄👁"

I wanna say Clay doesn't know what a lesbian is but in my canon Sunny is a lesbian so Starflight has already told him

Anyway he's super supportive

From that point Peril is sorta open about her sexuality?

Like, she gives Clay permission to tell the rest of the D.O.D bc she isn't about to risk being in front of them when they hear the news

(When Sunny starts actively seeking her out as a hang out buddy and Tsunami, Glory, and Starflight appear to tolerate her presence just a bit more afterwards she pretends she isn't confused by the change)

She's pink, white, and blue bc I said so

If you look at a certain angle in the right lighting her eyes, mouth, fire, and under her scales all look purple

But her fire is normally white and blue bc I said so

Also she pale as fuck bc in my canon their fire just sorta burns their colour away

You know how you leave something outside for too long and it gets sunbleached? Where it gets all washed out?

Like that but more extreme

By the age of 10-12 firescale dragons are just white with pale eyes

That's right not even the eyes are safe

Ram horns :P

I'm also fond of Peril/Sunny

Or maybe Peril/Sora/Sunny

But Peril/Sora is the main thing

On the topic of that bringing in my hc that if one sib in a sib group is fire resistant all of them are

She,,, She can change her scale colour

But only slightly and only if her emotions are strong enough

Bc I don't give a fuck about Darkstalker's scroll we were robbed of hybrid Peril

Unfortunately all of Peril's emotions are strong

Rainwing ruff along her head and neck

It's like a hood

It's mainly smoothed to her sides but when she's startled it flares out

RAINWING PUPILS

Y'all will know what those look like as soon as I get off my ass :P

She,,, She can mimic bird cries

Hates the summer

She has more than enough body heat already and the outside is just hot enough to add on and make her feel sick

She can somewhat control her heat but most of the time it's based on her emotions

It can go from standing-in-the-middle-of-a-burning-building-cant-see-your-nose-smoke-is-so-thick heat (Strong emotion) to Hey-thats-a-nice-cozy-campfire heat (Calm/"weak" emotion/Sleeping)

I'm just gonna make a different post with all my Peril hcs cuz there isnt enough room for all of them here

[toomanyfandoms02]

Thoughts - Part 1 // Matthew Gray Gubler x Reader

This timeline is set around 2006 because that's when the actually 2nd season of Criminal Minds was going on. So Matthew is about 26.

Summary - Soulmate AU! Once you turn 18, you can hear some of your soulmates thoughts. And when you meet, your thoughts go silent for 30 seconds. Readers soulmate is quite the character. (Anything you see in bold is the other persons thought.)

Word count : 2.1k

This is kind of experimental lmao, lemme know if you like it :)))

"What was your first soulmate thought y/n?" I got this question often, everyone did. This time it was asked by a new friend of mine, we met in our cinematography class this semester at LAFS ( Los Angeles Film School ).

"I think my story is one of the more fun ones."

"I bet mines better." Her eyes held promise, but I wasn't sure she could beat me.

*It was currently 1:15 pm, and I was waiting patiently for my first soulmate thought. I was with my best friend Marley, we sat in the cafeteria of my college, mind you, surrounded by other people.*

*"What time were you born again?" She had asked the question so many times this hour, by the way she was bouncing, you would think that we were waiting for hers.*

*"1:19 pm for the last time Marley." I giggled, nudging her shoulder. I took a bite of the cupcake she had bought me for my birthday. It took no time for the clock to hit 1:19, I anxiously waited to hear something, anything.*

"Now disclaimer." I told my friend, who I now knew as Alex. "I knew that some people had reported that their first soulmate thoughts were kind of, *loud*. But I can tell you that I was severely unprepared."

*Only 30 seconds after my watch ticked past 1:19, I heard a near deafening screech in my head.*

***"What the fuck?!"** The thought was so obnoxious and loud that I spit the fluffy pastry from my mouth and directly onto the back of another person, holding tightly to my ears, this did not help.*

*"What's going on? What did they say?" Marley leaned over to me, rubbing my back with a horrified look. Not long after, the man I had spit on turned around with a furious look.*

*"Hey I'm so sorry." I choked out, waving a hand at the man. "My soulmate thought was painful." The man rolled his eyes with an angry huff, taking his cardigan off and turning back to his table.*

*"What did they say y/n?!" There she went again, bouncing like a dodgeball.*

*"What the fuck." My eyes darted to hers, narrowed slightly. She furrowed her brows at me. "He literally thought, what the fuck, so loudly."*

Alex was on the floor giggling like a fiend, she held her stomache as if her guts would spill out with so much joy.

"Nope, you're right." She could barely speak between laughter. "I can't beat that." She promptly wiped the tears from her eyes, composing herself. "So you haven't met him yet?" She let out a final sigh.

"Nope. When I meet him, I kinda wanna slap him." A sly smile made it's way onto my lips. "The little shit thinks the weirdest things! I have had to deal with his thoughts for 4 years, and I'm ready for the complete silent bliss when I meet him." I laid my head back on the couch.

**I would really like a fruit roll up right now.**

"Speak of the idiot, he really wants a fruit roll up right now." Alex shook her head at me.

"Maybe he will be funny?"

"We'll see about that. What was your first soulmate thought?"

-

Tonight was Marley and I's 'introduction night.' Similar to a movie night, we have a night every two weeks where we either introduce the other to a new show or movie, alternating turns.

"I think you'll like this one." She plopped onto the loveseat, nearly throwing and spilling the hot popcorn on me while grabbing the remote. "It's a crime show, just started last year so after this season we can just keep up with it. If you like it of course." The show was flipped onto the first episode, it was a man talking about an unsub, or unidentified subject. Then a younger guy walked in, interrupting him.

"Who is that guy?" The words flew from my mouth before I could even think them.

"Spencer Reid-"

"No, I mean his *real* name. He looks *so* familiar." It felt like my brain was eating itself alive, why did he look so familiar.

"I think his name is Matthew Gray Gubler." Marley shrugged, not taking her eyes off the screen.

"Has he been in anything else but this?"

"He models a lot. That's probably where you saw him." She pushed some magazines around on her coffee table and threw one at me. "He's on page 16, Hilfiger Jean's." I flipped to the page, seeing his face again.

"Wow, he is something else. I must have just unknowingly saw him in a magazine somewhere."

"I know! Once I saw him on here, I knew you would think he was cute too. Plus, he's a genius. I figured this would be another Peter Parker situation again." She teased, poking at my giant crush on Spiderman AKA Toby Maguire a few years ago.

"Shut up!" I snickered, throwing a pillow at her head. My own thoughts were interrupted by one that was not my own.

**I wish Halloween would come faster.**

"Its literally May." I whispered to myself, earning a weird look from Marley. This is the typical weird thought, Halloween is big on his mind.

I of course ended up loving the show. ~~And may or may not have had a huge crush on Spencer Reid already.~~

I informed Marley that we would most certainly be catching up on the show regularly, making that out new weekly thing for a while.

Though I could truly not get that Matthew guy out of my head, and I had a weird feeling it wasn't just because I thought he was super hot.

Matthew

**Who is Matthew Gray Gubler?**

The thought nearly made me spit out my coffee as I walked through the set. I knew for sure that wasn't my thought.

*No shit sherlock.*

Now *that* was my thought.

The question swirled around in my head, I really wanted to just think,

*I'm Matthew Gray Gubler!*

Just to make this whole process easier. Who knows if she could even actually *hear* it if I did answer her, or that she would believe me.

So lost in my train of thoughts, pun intended, I ran right into a punch cart.

"Holy shit!" The punch came spilling down right onto my khaki pants. I rested my forehead on the rim of my coffee mug. "I'm so sorry Terry, I was really caught up in my head."

"It's alright." He pulled a towel from his back pocket, throwing it onto the puddle that was forming on the wood floor. "Thinkin' about a girl?"

"Yes actually, thinking about my soulmate. Let me help you with that." I kneeled down on the floor, wiping up the spill. "Sorry again."

"It's all good Matthew." He dragged the cart to the opposite side of the room.

**Why can I not focus damnit?! This trip is suppose to be fun. Focus y/n. Focus!**

Y/n! I've never heard her name before. Maybe shes getting closer to me.

I set my coffee on the table of the reading room, pulling my script out and sitting next to AJ.

"You seem out of it today, are you feeling okay?" She tapped my shoulder. "I saw you run directly into the lunch cart." She clearly tried to suppress a giggle.

"How did you meet Nathan? How did you do it?" My script was not slammed onto the table, my hands pressed firmly on top of it.

"Are you worried about soulmates again? Matthew, she will come to you-"

"She said my name!!" My hands flailed wilding in the air. "I heard her think it! This sucks." I laughed a bit at the end, feeling ridiculous and vulnerable. Ask phone buzzed on the table, interrupting my dilemma.

"Well I hate to stop you in the middle of this debacle, but we have a film class coming in to observe, I guess sit was suppose to be a surprise." AJ shrugged with a pity smile, which is my least favorite version of a smile. I dramatically slammed my head on the back of my rolling chair, groaning like a child.

"Come on Gubler, we don't even have to do anything, we just have to act normal so they can observe. Let's go educate some college kids." She stood above me, patting my head and dragging my seat from the table a few inches. I reluctantly stood up and left the reading room.

To be clear, if it were any other day than the day that I found out my soulmates name, I would be totally in the game. I love teaching people, I love being an inspiration, but all I could think about was how close yet how far I was from meeting the love of my life. I shook it all off, physically and mentally, while heading to the set.

*Time to get my head in the game.*

I hope my soulmate heard that and started thinking of highschool musical.

-

"Action!" I held my prop gun in my hand while following Shermar, he proceeded to kick a door down that had a camera on the other side to capture it. The class that was observing sat on the other side of the door, seeing all of the behind the scenes that goes on during filming.

To avoid making direct eye contact with the camera, I often look right past it. So instead of making eye contact with the camera, I made it with a girl.

Then it was silent.

I stopped in the doorway, leading AJ to slam right into me on her way through the door.

"What the hell are you doing Matthew?"

"Cut!"

**You have got to be fucking kidding me.**

We did not break our stare, her eyes wide now with the realization.

*Wow.*

The girl sitting next to her was shaking her shoulder violently, but she sat unfazed.

"Can you excuse me for a second?" Bobby Roth, our director for the day looked at me like I was dumb, inevitably giving in.

"Whatever, take 5 guys."

I immediately waltzed past the cameraman and over to, who I could only assume, was my soulmate. The girl next to her was promptly slapping her arm and squealing like a pig, but she was giving her quite the death stare.

*She's my kind of girl already.*

Right as I thought that, she looke duo at me with a large grin and a tilt of the head.

*Shit.*

**Damn, even cuter in person.**

"Thank you." I couldn't suppress the automatic pep in my step meeting her. "I'm Matthew, you must be y/n?" It came out as a question because I was worried I would be wrong, and embarrass myself.

Which I've done, many times.

"You know my name?"

"I uh, I heard you think it." I pointed to my head, nodding awkwardly.

"You are so weird." She laughed, which made my face reddened more 3x more than I'm sure it already was.

"What?" I managed to murmur out.

"Well, you just think about weird stuff, mostly Halloween though." She was slowly smiling more as she spoke of me, which made my heart skip a few beats. She was so much more beautiful than I had pictured her. Her eyes held every intelligent thought that I had ever heard from her, and I knew right then that the eyes were the door to the soul. "Now that I'm here," she finally stood to my level, poking at my chest. "Do you wanna do a couples costume? This year?" She did a cute half shrug, as if I would say no.

"Oh my God, you really are my soulmate." I pulled her into a hug, a tight one, never wanting to let her go now that I'd found her.

"Alright guys! Let's go!" Bobby motioned everyone back to the set.

"Yeah, get out there *Spencer*." She patted her hand on my cheek. I didn't know if I hoped that she *did* see or *didn't* see how much I already liked her on my face, but I could feel the admiration spilling from my features.

"I- I'll talk to you after this!" I stumbled backwards from her, going back to the set and awkwardly running my back into the cameraman.

"Can't wait!" She waved with a flushed face, sitting back down next to her friend who was now shaking both of her shoulders violently.

*This is the best day of my life.*

**Same.**

---------

I've got a few more Soulmat AU ideas if you want more! I just don't know if theres any demand, so LEMME KNOW.

[writing-gifts]

datura (moth!bruno x butterfly!reader)

—–

A/N: idk what to say so here’s another chapter ft. oblivious bruno lmao

First Chapter || Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Reader is gender neutral!

-----

[Early Fall]

You thought you were at peace with Summer ending but apparently that wasn’t the case. Every time you woke up and it was a little colder than the day before you’d curse the season. It was uncomfortable to adapt to and made you want to stay under your covers longer than you should.

You still tried to see the good in Autumn though. Such as the trees changing from various greens to reds, oranges, and yellows. It was a nice change of scenery. But you quickly remember with that came giant dead leaves almost landing on you, which wasn’t as nice. And these leaves would make the paths you walked extremely uneven. To you every pro had multiple drawbacks.

"I just don’t want to say goodbye to the warm weather, even if the heat would get a little unbearable some days,” you complain to your friend.

"Yeah. It’s going to suck when it gets too cold to fly."

Frowning even more, you pour the bag of grain you’re holding into a storage container. Since it would only be getting cooler from now on Abilene needed to start saving up food and you were helping them.

"Don’t look so down, we can keep each other company during it. By the way, have you started preparing for Winter?" Abilene asks.

“Yep! You know I have copious amounts of nectar stored at all times.”

"Of course, of course how silly of me."

You stick out your tongue at them but stop when you almost spill some of the grain on the ground.

You both continue to work in relative silence but if thoughts could make noise it would be extremely loud. Something has been plaguing your mind recently. Something related to Bruno.

Your crush on the moth had always been there but instead of fading away like you expected, it seemed to have grown exponentially over the Summer.

You put down the bag you just finished emptying. “Hey Abby...”

“Hm?”

You shift slightly from foot to foot, unsure how to bring up the topic. “Um, would it be strange if two different species got together?"

Abilene looks puzzled. “No? I've seen a lot of bugs do it, and honestly you and Bruno aren't that different. Moths and butterflies are probably under the same category."

"W-Wait, I didn't mention anything like that…"

Your friend shrugs, opening up another bag. "Why else would you ask a question that you already know the answer to? I’m guessing your little crush got more serious?"

You rub at your arm, your bottom hands wringing each other. "I thought I just had a crush because of his looks but I spent too much time with him and it got worse!”

"Yea, that's how relationships tend to work."

"Abby this is serious, I don't know what to do!"

They close the bin they just finished filling and look at you. “Maybe just confess?”

You almost roll your eyes. “You know that I can't do that. That’s the sensical thing to do!”

"I guess you're just going to have to suffer then. Unless, he confesses to you."

That gives you pause. You couldn't exactly see Bruno feeling the same way. Was that even a possibility?

"What if he doesn't see me that way?"

"As harsh as it sounds, you just have to accept and respect that. But at least you’ll know and there won't be any ‘what ifs’."

That was true but rejection was a scary thing. Scary enough to prevent you from even trying. And there was always that chance that the confession would ruin your friendship.

Suddenly, you didn't want to talk about this anymore.

“You okay?”

"I don't know...I just need to think a little more on this."

You help more silently from then on. It takes a while before you're done emptying the bags and the filled bins are placed neatly in Abilene’s pantry. And after cleaning up any spilled grains, you’re ready to walk home. Even though you try to reassure Abilene, they tag along to “prevent you from getting distracted”.

By the time you both get through the path between your homes, the sun’s on the verge of setting but you're surprised to find Bruno already waiting by the front steps.

The realization that crosses Abilene's face when they see him has you suddenly feeling antsy. You were not ready for this. You planned for them to meet during the upcoming play.

"Is this The Bruno?" they whisper to you.

Oh god.

“Abby please act normal…”

You both walk up to the moth, although you lag behind your friend.

When you catch up, Abilene’s already introducing themselves.

“I’m glad to finally meet the person I’ve been hearing so often about.”

You squint at Abilene trying to show your disapproval with just your eyes, but they simply return an “innocent” smile.

Fortunately, Bruno doesn’t question their comment. “Well It’s nice that I can finally sate your curiosity.”

“Definitely. But also it’s the perfect time to make sure that ____ is making friends with people with their best interest in mind. No offense.”

You internally groan. Abilene didn’t exactly sound confrontational but you can’t help feeling that from what they just said. If you knew they would act like this you would have avoided Bruno and Abilene meeting at all costs.

You sigh. “I told you he was safe….”

Bruno gives Abilene a slight smile, "It's good that they have someone looking after them. And I don't blame you considering how we met.”

You look at Abilene and for some reason they don't seem as sure as they did a moment ago.

“I've been wondering for a while...” Bruno continues. “Has ____ always liked to stay out late?”

Abilene seems to step out of whatever temporary daze they went into. “Unfortunately, yes. Ever since they were a caterpillar. I don't even know where they picked it up from, but you don't even want to know some of the other things I’ve caught them doing.”

The moth's brows raise and he looks at you, “That’s not very reassuring.”

“Guys”, you interject. Bruno did not need to know about that. Especially after what you said at the pond.

“I don't stay out that late anymore! At least not by myself anyways.”

"I suppose that's true." Bruno says.

“But the fact that you managed to discourage them from doing that is really amazing, you know?”

“It wasn’t easy trust me.”

You purse your lips. Sure you can be stubborn when it came to visiting flowers but were you really that bad? They had to be exaggerating. And you didn't need both your friends calling you out on your bad habits together. At least not in front of your face.

"By the way Abby, when did you say the play was again?” you ask.

"That’s coming up pretty soon actually--in a week.”

"I’m still curious about the ‘supernatural’ element," Bruno says.

You release a breath seeing that your question was enough to change to subject.

"Do you like supernatural stuff? Abby’s surprisingly into it."

“Not necessarily. I’m just wondering what they were planning since it was so vague.”

Abby nods. “I thought they would explain it when the play date got closer but it’s still pretty vague so guess we’ll just have to find out on the day.”

As the conversation continues you feel yourself relaxing. It really wasn't weird or awkward like you had been worrying about. Even if you wanted to pinch Abilene whenever they said something that even slightly implied your crush on the moth.

It doesn’t take long before the sun is gone and it’s dark out.

Abilene glances up. "Well, I’m going to head back now. Don’t want to let it get too late.”

You slightly pout. Now that the initial part of the meeting has passed you didn’t want this to end so quickly. "Aw okay. See ya later, Abby."

"It was nice meeting you. Be safe getting back," Bruno says.

Abilene smiles at you both, “Bye ____, and I’ll be seeing you at the play Bruno."

They turn to leave but they stop and lean towards your ear. “Now I know why you were so desperate to keep in contact with him--very handsome,” they whisper.

You push them in the direction of their home. “Yes goodbye Abby! Get back safely.”

They snicker at you, not moving as quickly as you would like. “I will obviously. Bye!”

Exhaling deeply, you watch them head back through the path you two came from.

“You guys seem like very good friends.”

You scowl still reeling from what that grasshopper said. “I have no friends!”

“What?”

You sigh when you see Bruno’s questioning gaze and open your front door. “Nothing, just come and get your nectar.”

After Bruno and Abilene’s brief meeting you find yourself looking more forward to the play. Fortunately, the next several days pass by quickly and the three of you all meet up at your home before heading there together.

It’s quite crowded when you arrive but you all manage to find a spot together and you sit in between your friends.

Throughout the play, you couldn’t stop yourself from looking over at Bruno to see his reactions. One time you look over and he looks right back, which makes you finally stop, afraid that he had noticed you doing that the whole time. Other than that everything else went smoothly, or as smoothly as a unique play like that could go.

It went on pretty long, starting late afternoon so any bug whether diurnal or nocturnal would be able to attend. Now the last of the sun covers everything in an orange glow and those who need it can make it home safely.

You walk alongside your friends, leaving the open theater area to head back towards your home. It’s only a short while before the three of you are walking along a river bank.

You cautiously watch the running water, your eyes every so often follow the random leaves being carried away.

"I wasn’t expecting that…” you say.

It was a romance story like the poster said but the supernatural part was definitely something new to you.

“When Athan started drinking from the other mosquito--,” Abilene chuckles.

You side eye your usually practical friend. “You were into that...?”

Abilene shrugs, “It’s not the first time I’ve seen or read stories like this. Definitely has a strange allure to it...”

You decide to not ask them to go into detail since Bruno’s here and turn to said moth instead.

“Did you think it was weird?”

“Some parts were definitely strange, especially all the blood drinking, but I enjoyed it overall,” he says.

“Hmm, do you like romance?”

“I guess I tend to lean towards it.”

You nod. “I could tell you really liked the more uhh s-sensual parts?”

You know that sounded off and you can see Bruno wants to laugh but he holds it behind a small smile.

Abilene looks at you with a raised brow. “Why did you have to say it like that?”

“I don't know how else to say it! The sexy parts?!”

You and Abilene fill most of the silence while Bruno mainly listens, throwing in his opinion every once in a while. Eventually he needs to split off from the group to head towards his own home. So you exchange goodbyes and he flies off.

“Bruno looked really happy!”

Abilene’s brows raise slightly. “...He did? He seemed at most content to me.”

“Nah, I think he really enjoyed himself,” you couldn't help the grin on your face. You wanted to do more things like this with your friends.

For some reason Abilene starts smiling at you with a knowing look and you just stare back confused.

“What?”

“Nothing, just smiling.”

You huff. “Come on.”

“Okay, you're so cute right now. I can tell that you really like Bruno a lot and spend a lot of time with him.”

“Oh...”

Was it that obvious? You didn't even say anything strange though, at least you think you didn’t.

“I can't make you do anything but I really think you should embrace your feelings,” your friend says.

“I don't know...How should I go about it cause I’m too afraid to just come out and say it.”

Abilene holds their chin as they think. “Well, perhaps you just need to show him.”

“Like trying to hold hands or something? That seems a bit much--I mean, we did do that once…”

“You held hands already?” They sound very curious.

You wave your hand in front of your face. “He was leading me through the dark, but we’re getting off topic! What do you mean?”

“Just like hints at feeling more. Maybe compliment him more. If you're feeling really brave, maybe offer a hug.”

The idea of hugging Bruno has your heart lurching.

Abilene tries to give you a supportive smile. “Honestly this isn’t my area of expertise but you can’t expect anything if you just wait around. And you don't have to go hard all at once, just start off small.”

You really didn’t want to constantly wonder ‘what if’ in the future so you agree with this plan. “I’ll try…”

It definitely won't be easy though.

-----

The sky had been dark and cloudy since morning and only got darker as the day went on. The pressure drop in the air was obvious but not a single raindrop fell. You just hoped it wouldn’t flood when it finally did decide to pour.

You were sitting on the ground in front of your low table sewing. You had neglected this hobby for baking last season so you decided to finally get back to it since you didn’t expect Bruno to show up tonight. You actually hadn't seen the moth that often since the play. Apparently, Narancia wanted him to stay with him more often and of course parent duty came first.

While focusing on pinning the cloth together that would be a new top, there's a knock on your front door which causes you to tilt your head. You wonder who it was. Maybe Abilene but they rarely came over this late, especially right before rain.

When you walk over to open the door and see Bruno, you immediately give him a questioning look. “What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to visit.”

“That’s it? But it’s going to rain though! How are you going to get back? What if it rained while you were coming here?”

“It’s fine--”

Suddenly there’s a loud clap of thunder, a bright flash and the stormy clouds finally release the rain they had been holding on to all day. Which instantly soaks Bruno.

You pull him in hastily and shut the door. “Holy crap, are you okay?”

“I probably should have not pushed my luck standing outside like that.” He wipes the fluff on his forearm across his face but it barely helps.

“Ah wait, let me get you something to dry off.”

You run to your bedroom to find a giant towel for the moth.

When you come back into the main room, you hold it out for him to take. He immediately brings the soft towel to his face and you leave again to get some blankets. It wasn’t too cold but it would be best to warm him up to absolutely avoid sickness.

When you come back with some of your fluffiest blankets in your arms, you see that Bruno has removed the golden clips from his hair to dry it. The braid on the top of head has come loose and the strands that once formed it sit slightly wavy atop the rest of his hair.

You suddenly remember Abilene’s advice to be more honest with your feelings but you could barely look at the moth right now. Damn him for not wearing clothes and looking good even soaked.

You finally look away and drop the blankets on your daybed.

“____.”

You turn back towards him.

“Can you do me a favor?”

“Uh, yea?”

“If you don’t mind, I need help reaching my wings.”

“O-Oh.”

Why didn't you think of that. Getting back there would take way longer by himself

You grab the towel and move behind him to gently dab at his damp wings, careful not to cause any damage. The towel wouldn't be able to dry them completely but it would slightly speed up the process. They would have to mainly air dry though.

“You won't be able to fly for a while Bruno. Not that you could fly back in this rain anyways,” you say.

“I know.”

You almost want to chide the moth for how indifferent he sounded, but you decide to let it go. Both of you knew you weren’t the pinnacle of careful behavior anyways.

“I’m not going to kick you out, obviously, but I don’t know if you’re comfortable with staying overnight.”

“Why wouldn’t I be comfortable? I would actually really appreciate it.”

“Well, then I guess that's settled then.” You gently touch the wing that's slightly overlapped on top of the other and direct it upwards so you can better get to the bottom one. They felt pleasantly fuzzy. Similar to a cushion you would like to lay your face on or rub your hands all over.

Brunos wings shift slightly under your fingertips. “T-Thanks for helping me dry off.”

You momentarily pause. “You cold?”

“Not much.”

You couldn't tell if he was being honest or trying to pretend but you’re sure you heard him stutter. You shake it off quickly so you can finish trying to get some of the water off his wings. After you finish you lead him towards the daybed.

“I bought you covers to warm up. You can air dry your wings later.”

“But I’m not that cold.”

“I’m hearing that you’re still cold though so I’m not taking any nos.”

The moth sits on the daybed in slight resignation, and you quickly wrap the covers around him, layering him with one after the other. Once you're done, you laugh at his face poking out of the hill of blankets and his antenna being forced down by the wait of the covers.

He furrows his brow, blowing the fur on his antenna out of his face. “Don’t you think these are too many covers?”

You do your best to speak through your laughs. “Better--Better safe than sorry.”

“This is so…” He shakes his head, well the best that he can under those covers, not bothering to finish his thought.

“Don’t worry, you look great like this!” Your laughs finally start to slow and you sit down next to the blanket heap that is Bruno. “If you need anything else just let me know kay?”

The moth moves the blankets to sit on his shoulder instead on top of his head. “I should be okay. Thank you again for letting me stay.”

“No problem. I would have let you for no reason honestly.”

Bruno watched you slide off the daybed onto the floor so you can continue your sewing.

“What are you making?” he asks.

“A top. I want to wear something new for the upcoming cold.”

You pull out a pin from your flower shaped pincushion.

“Actually, do you ever wear clothes? I’ve never seen you in any since I met you,” you say.

“Barely, I don’t really get cold enough that I need to.”

Your lips twist to the side, unconvinced. It’s not like his legs and torso weren’t nice to look at, but part of you wanted to dress him up. You're sure he’d look great. And just knowing his thighs and torso were always exposed made you worried about the inevitable drop in temperature.

“Not even in the Winter? But youre almost completely exposed….”

“I stay mostly indoors during it and I can keep myself warm if necessary.”

“How?”

“I’ll just warm myself up by vibrating.”

You raise a brow. “...Vibrating?”

“It’s not exactly the warmest at night in Autumn so I need to vibrate my wings so I can fly. Do you want to see?”

You didn't want him to take off the covers so you shake your head, “Maybe another time.”

It did sound interesting, however you can't help thinking wearing clothes would be more convenient. Especially when it came to flying since it could get pretty chilly if you went fast enough.

“You must not be very fond of clothing. Or maybe you don’t like them at all?” you contemplate out loud. “Very interesting…”

“Is it really that unconventional to you?”

“It's fine, it’s fine. You can be exposed or whatever,” you say teasingly. “It's not like it's against the rules.”

The moth’s brow furrows. “I don't exactly hate wearing clothing, I just dont think it’s necessary for me.”

“I guess that’s true with all your fluff and you probably have a higher tolerance to cold than me. I still think you'd look good in something though. It’s actually pretty fun having stuff to change into.”

You notice that Bruno’s looking at your clothes and for some reason you decide to make a dumb joke. “Are you hungry or something?”

“If you're implying that I want to eat your clothes, then no.” He smirks a bit. “Unless you want me to, then I won’t be taking any bites near you, so you don’t have anything to worry about.”

Your eyes widen slightly, unsure of what to make of that. Next time you try to be clever you need to be better prepared.

“A-Anyways, maybe I could make you something one day! Do you have any preferences?”

“Maybe something that doesn’t restrict me too much. And doesn’t cover up my fur. It gets uncomfortable during the Summer.”

You cross off anything with long sleeves.

“Maybe it doesn’t have to be a typical top…” you say outloud to yourself.

An idea is taking shape in your mind's eye but you're not exactly sure how you’ll go about it yet. You might need to make a visit with your more arachnid than insect neighbor.

“Well for now I’m going to knit you a sweater for winter cause I’m not letting you walk around shirtless in the cold!”

“You know I do actually own clothes right?”

“But you said you barely wear them so I'm still making you a sweater. I'm going to make it so you can remove the forearm sleeves if you want, okay?”

“You can make it however you please. I’ll take whatever you make for me”

You shake your head. “That’s sweet but I want you to really like it too--like it so much that you’ll never want to take it off! So I want to make sure it’s something that would be completely comfortable for you.”

Bruno pulls the blankets closer to him. “I’m sure you’d come up with something good without my input, but if it will make it easier for you then I’m fine with that.”

After asking a few more questions related to the sweater, you continue working on the shirt in front of you while you try to figure out how you'd go about making a sheer piece of clothing. At one point you look over and see that Bruno has fallen asleep on top of all the covers that were previously wrapped around him.

You reach out to feel his wings without really thinking. They’re still wet of course but it was better than before.

The moth shifts in his sleep and opens a tired eye.

“Sorry, just checking your wings. Go back to sleep.”

He shuts his eye. “I’m going to poke at your wings when you fall asleep…” It was impossible to take that seriously with his voice being so groggy.

“I would barely call that a poke,” you roll your eyes when you see his lips form a soft smile. It’s tempting to reach out and pinch his nose but you leave him alone.

The rain continues to be heavy and persistent throughout the rest of the evening, filling your home with a pleasant hum. Once it gets too late for you to keep sewing you decide to leave your stuff on the table, too tired to clean up.

You move to get off the floor and jump when you realize Bruno was awake.

“Have you been laying there quietly the whole time?”

Bruno props himself up to better look at you. “Yes?”

“You should have said something, I would have talked to you!”

“You seemed focused and I didn’t want to distract you.”

You shake your head at the somewhat socially inept but considerate action. “Well I guess I’ll head to bed. Will you be comfortable here?”

“With all these covers and this daybed? Definitely.”

You grin, “I really can't believe you risked the rain to come over here. Did it really need to be today?”

The question was supposed to be mostly rhetorical but the moth still answers.

“Narancia wanted to stay over with a friend so I decided to visit. I knew I could make it if I was quick enough.���

But look at you now silly moth.

“That’s it?”

You were still confused by Bruno’s actions but he continues speaking.

“I wanted to visit you. I finally had a chance to come over and I didn’t want to let it pass by.”

How can he say things like that so easily?

“Oh, okay that’s--Thanks, I’m glad to see you too.”

The Bruno you were looking at right now with his messy hair and completely relaxed posture was almost hard to process. But when his usually serious expression is replaced by something more at ease and soft, your stomach feels weird, like something is fluttering within and you can barely keep eye contact.

“Y-You’re actually really cute sometimes--” You freeze as soon as the words come out of your mouth. It wasn’t an accident, you fully intended to say them but actually hearing them outloud? It was embarrassing.

“GOODNIGHT!” you yell before the moth can speak and quickly walk out of the room, leaving a probably highly weirded out Bruno on your daybed.

[uwuch9n]

hey person !! today i'll be writing some 2AM sugawara fluff because i'm bored and not tired :D hope u enjoy reading !

characters: sugawara & nb y/n (self insert or oc)

warnings or possible triggers: hands are touched, making out, neck being grabbed (not aggressively!!,) suga and y/n both tear up, goosebumps, a confession, & hugging ! please do not continue reading if any of these things could trigger any unwanted reactions ! maybe the next time i write some fluff or sfw fanfics you’ll be able to read ‘em !

picnic date after practice.

you watch sugawara, asahi, and daichi all laughing and messing around after practice, while kageyama and hinata do their gay little thing. you've been watching them play for the longest time, cheering them on in the crowd, and now that you're in the official karasuno volleyball team, you can't even believe how pretty sugawara actually is up close. or how good they cooperate in the team, that too. sugawara caught your attention the most though, and you knew exactly what it was. his beautiful smile and his soothing voice. though he's never actually talked to you as anything more than a teammate, you felt as though he was just.. special.

of all the boys in the volleyball team, or even in the entirety of karasuno, sugawara was the one you really would like to know the most.

that's when you finally snap out of your little fantasy world and realize that THE sugawara is walking up to you with the biggest smile. you start to tense up, obviously. you've been crushing on him since when..? ever since you saw him? yeah.

"hey there y/n ! i got a question for you, if you don't mind taking a few minutes to talk!" he says enthusiastically. woah. sugawara knows your name and wants to talk to you. SUGAWARA. WANTS. TO. TALK. TO. YOU. and he knows your name.

"wh- yeah sure i've got all day! what's up?" you say acting like this was totally cool with you and you totally weren't just thinking about him. his smile doesn't leave his face, in fact it only grows bigger. he seemed glad that you were free all day. you just didn't know why he was so happy about it.

"awesome ! well i was trying to reach you yesterday but i guess you aren't the type to pick up random numbers are you," he giggled, "i should've messaged you instead... but anyway! i wanted to talk to you about your blocking.. it's really impressive. and i just wanted to say that for a new addition to our team, you really are very skilled. and im so proud of you for that y/n! but im getting off track here aren't i.." he rambled on and on about how impressed he was by you and how he wanted to get to know you better. you sat there flustered and shocked, but still willing to listen to every compliment he threw at you.

his rambling continued and you are able to understand all of it, but then you hear him ask you... a very WATTPAD-ESQUE question.

"i was wondering if maybe you wanted to go on a little picnic date with me so that we could talk about the team.. or if you'd like, talk about each other! whatever you want, i'll make sure to make it happen and-" you cut him off. "MHM! let's totally do it!! i'm so down !! SO PUMPED !! woohOOO! i would love that !!" you blabber out excitedly.

"awe great! when would you like to go? like in a few minutes?? maybe tomorrow? i mean we could go get dressed at home and then bring all the supplies and stuff and meet up at a park if you're fine with it! i'll send you the address of my favorite park.. here lemme just..."he proposed while reaching for his phone. you nod in agreement and both of you exchange numbers, giving each other nicknames in the contact list.

fast forward; you two are already at the park, setting up the picnic spot. (i know im lazy im sorryy)

"alright doll, would you mind bringing over the food basket i set up for us? it's right- yeah right there!" he giggled as you quickly pointed at where it was while he was mid-sentence. he brushed off any unnecessary leaves and dirt on the picnic blanket, and sat down, moving around the food items and snacks to make the setup look cuter and more enjoyable. you finally finish bringing over all the snacks you brought from home and set them down, organizing them alongside suga.

"is that a separate bowl of konpeitō??!" you ask shocked. it was your personal favorite candy and you were curious to know how HE knew that. "yeah it is! i love konpeitō a lot so i brought some for us to share, it's my favorite candy." he replied while scratching his head. "no way! it's my favorite candy too! that's cool!!" you say very hyped. you both giggle and talk about how you two were feeling. things like "how was your week?" and "did you enjoy practice?" were probably the first few questions of the bunch.

of course, the conversation didn't stay dry, and you two talk about lots of things, ranging from why your favorite song was actually a meme song to why sugawara doesn't like to share his snacks with daichi because he eats them all.

you both enjoyed the delicious konpeitō, nommed on some homemade suga-sandwiches, and sipped on fruit punch flavored juice happily while talking about how cute the ducks at the park were.

then sugawara's curiosity kicked in.

"hey doll, i think you already know what i saved you as in my phone, but i never found out what you saved me as.. is it alright if you tell me?" he asked suddenly. he was itching to know what you decided to call him. this was very important to sugawara and you could tell, so you quickly followed up. "i got you saved as suga-bear with a white heart next to it!" you said, smiling gently. he blushed a bit from how calm you said it. your smile made his mind go blank.

"that's.. adorable y/n.. that's so cute..." he lets out after finally finding out how to breathe again. you look away, clearly blushing because of how cute he looked while saying that. he finally mustered up the courage to caress your soft tender hand, squeezing it, not too tightly, and then slowly redirecting his hand to your warm, rosy cheek.

"y/n, honestly.. if i didn't ask you on this date would i have even known how incredibly cute you actually were?" he said as he looked deeply into your eyes, getting lost in them by each passing second. your thoughts raced as his warm hand rested against your left cheek and the wind slowly hit your back. you could hear your heart beating much faster than before. it was a very tense yet relaxing moment.

before you could even respond to his rhetorical question, he leaned in and slowly kissed your lips, his tongue accidentally slipping in. neither of you regretted it though. you kissed back; and for a short moment, your mind went blank. you could feel both his hands moving towards your neck and shoulders. he grabbed your neck gently and only fell into a deeper kiss than when his lips first met yours. his fingers wrapped around your neck and even just the feeling of it gave you goosebumps.

"i don't know if it's too soon to even say this but it's just... it feels right to." he says as he pulled away from the kiss. "doll..." he sighed. "i love you.. and im not holding back from saying that because i know that if we spend even just one more minute together i'll already want to give you the world and all of the universes on a silver platter." he confessed.

you couldn't even believe what was happening. i mean, the kiss alone was enough to make you pass out and yet here you were listening to your crush of 3 years confess his love to you at a cute picnic date.

"i... i love you a lot. im not just saying that because we're here on a little picnic date and i'm not saying it with hopes to make you feel better or give you false hope. i truly feel like you just.. make me feel even more comfortable being myself. even if it was just a short picnic date, even if we played together once or twice during practice, even if this is our first time actually having a full-on conversation. i really do love you... so so much.." you could see a tear rolling down his cheek as he mouthed "thank you" and kissed your cheek.

he went in for a hug and moved his hands and arms up and down against your back. he laughed off his tears while still rubbing your back, and pulled away to wipe his tears. you could tell he wasn't joking about it and that made you get a little emotional too. he grabbed your face and kissed your forehead, then your nose, and lastly, a small peck on the lips.

"suga... i didn't know you felt the same way i did.." you said, reassuring him that you loved him just as much. he laughed through his tears and then sniffed. you could see how he was quickly getting much more comfortable with you.

"i always have... it's just now i'm able to actually tell you about it.. yknow?" he laughed. he intertwined his fingers with yours and tightly held your hands, putting them both close to his face and gently planting kisses on them. both of you looked into each other's eyes and leaned in for a final kiss while the sun was setting.

from the second you saw him, to the moment you two kissed, you knew suga was the one.

that’s all ! i hope you enjoyed this self insert x suga fluff fanfic ! i can't even tell if this one's good or not, but that's because i wrote this at like 2AM and i'm just posting it now because of the lil mistakes lmao. i dont rlly expect this to do any good, just a random fluff i wrote :,)

[yourfavewriteress]

the turn in our relationship | gabriel landeskog

Teaser: “This is really not just platonic for me anymore, and I’d rather tell you so that you know.”

Warnings: definitely a longer one; mentions of cancer

October 2019

“I thought you said she was going to be here,” I groaned.

“I thought she was going to be here, too!” Tyson exclaimed. “She canceled last minute and I thought you liked to hang out with me and not just her, Y/N.”

“Obviously,” I sighed, rolling my eyes. “It’s fine, I’ll just call her later.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asked, looking down at me outside of his front door where his party was currently going on. The same party that I was supposed to spend with Kacey, Tyson’s sister, until she decided to ditch and not tell me.

I had met Kacey a while ago through school and we immediately became best friends. And, because of her close relationship with Tyson, the three of us were always together. But, tonight, I wanted to see Kacey because I was 100% sure she was the only person that would know what to do in the situation I was currently in.

“I’m fine, Tyson. I just need a drink.”

“Okay,” He sighed. “Can you have fun tonight? You need it.”

“How sweet of you,” I glared at him. “Yes, as soon as I drink something.”

We went inside, and when Tyson went to rejoin his teammates, I beelined straight for the kitchen where the drinks were. As I was looking through the selection, one of Tyson’s teammates appeared. I recognized him as Gabe, the captain of the team. 

I have had very little contact with the captain of the Colorado Avalanche, other than the one time Tyson introduced us at a party. Since then, we never really crossed paths, even though I had built a friendship with EJ, someone he was also close with.

“Hey, Y/N,” Gabe smiled. I furrowed my eyebrows, surprised he even remembered my name. I recovered quickly, smiling politely,

“Hi, Gabe.”

“Why did you make that face?” He laughed. “Is there something wrong?

“No.”

“So,...?” He trailed off, still smiling.

“I didn’t think you remembered my name.”

“Well, I remember,” He responded, grabbing a beer from the fridge. “Is Kacey here?”

“No,” I sighed. “Which is great.”

“I’m sure you’re still gonna have fun,” He said, leaning on the counter. “Tyson would probably lose his mind if you didn’t.”

“Yeah, he would,” I laughed. “The perks of being frie-”

“-Landy! The game’s starting, let’s go!” EJ exclaimed, walking into the kitchen. “Y/N, nice of you to show your face for once.”

“You’re welcome,” I grinned at him. 

He rolled his eyes, “Whatever. We’re gonna do shots later so you better not leave.” He warned me.

“I’ll see you later, Y/N,” Gabe emphasized my name, making me roll my eyes, suppressing the blush that was creeping up my neck.

****

After failing to find any quiet inside of Tyson’s house, I settled for finally making my way to the backyard, sitting on the steps. I really wish Kacey showed up tonight. I sighed, looking up into at the sky that was littered with stars. 

A few minutes alone with my thoughts and fears was enough to force tears to cloud my eyes. As I wiped them, I heard the door open behind me. It closed moments later and I felt someone take the place next to me. Wholly expecting it to be Tyson, I continued holding my head up with my hands.

“It’s crazy how uncontrolled drunk hockey players are.”

I froze, immediately knowing that the voice did not belong to Tyson. Or EJ, for that matter. I picked my head up slowly, locking eyes with Gabe. For the second time in one night.

“Yeah, you guys get pretty wild,” I commented, looking back up at the sky.

“Are you doing okay?” He asked, and I could feel his stare in the side of my face.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I responded.

“I know we’re not close but I know that look,” He said, smiling softly. “Are you sure you’re good?”

“Like you said, we’re not close. I’m not gonna bore you and you don’t have to act like you care.”

“I do care, though,” He said. “And, it’s wouldn’t bore me. This party is boring me.”

I laughed lightly, shaking my head. “Welcome to the club.”

We sat in silence for a few moments before I spoke again. “I had a really tough day and I just wanted to see Kacey because I feel like she’s the only person that would know how to hold me together right now. But, even if she was here, I still have no idea what to say.”

“Why do you need to be held together?” He asked, his voice soft. 

“You can’t mention this to anyone, especially Tyson,” I said, turning to him.

“I won’t.”

“I don’t even know why I’m about to tell you this,” I breathed.

“Look, we don’t really know each other, you don’t have to worry about me telling anyone what you’re gonna say. You can just get off your chest, here with me, have fun tonight and talk to Kacey tomorrow. You’ll feel better.”

“Are you sure you won’t tell anyone?”

“Y/N, I promise you that it will stay between us. You have my word,” He smiled, reaching over and squeezing my hand. 

“It’s personal,” I sighed, running my hands through my hair. He nodded. “I found this lump, on my, you know.” I gestured towards my chest area.

“Are you serious?” His face dropped.

“Not the best reaction, captain.”

“Shit, I’m sorry, you’re right,” He moved closer to me. “Keep going.”

“I was showering and I feel like everything just froze. I didn’t know what to do. So, I googled, which was probably the worse decision. Everything on the internet makes you think you’re gonna die.”

“Anyone would have told you that the internet is the last place to look for anything like that,” He smiled.

“I had my appointment this morning and I got a mammogram done,” I said. “And, I’m really fucking scared of the results.”

“Have you told anyone?”

“Nope, just you,” I looked down. “Sorry, I know you probably expected something a little less serious.”

“Hey, I asked and I wanted to know,” He assured me. “But, look, you’re what, 27, right?”

“26.”

“Even better. You’re young, Y/N, and you don’t know for sure. It could be nothing.”

“Or, it could be cancer.”

“Look at me,” He said. His hand found mine again, squeezing gently. “Don’t think of the worse, I know it’s hard. But, come on, last I heard, all the guys are scared of you. Even if it is something, which we don’t know for sure, I’m positive it’s no match for you.”

“Thank you,” I said, my voice cracking slightly. Gabe smiled, pulling me into him, hugging me tightly. “I guess we’re no longer acquaintances anymore.”

“Yeah, that was a real turn in our relationship, without a doubt,” He laughed, his chest rumbling against mine.

After the party had ended, I made my way home. I did see Gabe again while taking shots with EJ. When I saw him, I thought I was going to regret telling him everything, since he is a stranger. But, I knew for some reason that I could trust him. Probably because Tyson trusts him so much. 

Once I got home, I saw a text from Kacey.

‘Hey, there’s some really crazy shit going on with the fam, sorry I couldn't make it tonight. I’m just dealing with a lot right now.’

‘Dude, do not worry about it. Everything okay? You wanna hang or space? I’m here for you.’

‘I definitely want to talk to only you, but I’m heading home like now so I won’t see you for at least a couple of weeks.’

‘Facetime me WHENEVER’

‘i will, how was the party?’

‘spent some time with gabe actually.’

‘don’t even text me the details, it has to be over facetime tomorrow, WTF GABE!? did y’all kiss?’

‘bye Kacey lmao we did not.’

November 2019

Two days after the party, I got a text from an unknown number.

‘Hey, it’s Gabe. How are you feeling?’

‘Hi, I’m fine. How did you get my number?’

‘I’m pretty sure we were in the same group chat once and I saved it. Just to know who was talking in the chat.’

‘Sneaky.’

We texted every day for at least a week, just getting to know each other. He was actually a really funny guy and we got along really well. There was never a dull moment in our conversation and I found myself waiting around for texts from him. And, I knew I was developing a crush but I was positive he was responding just out of pity for me after what I told him at Tyson’s party.

Speaking of, I was getting ready for my follow-up appointment, practically pacing around my room as I got dressed.

'What time is your appt again?’ Gabe texted me.

‘Soon, I’m getting ready now.’

‘Kacey and Tys are going right?’

‘No, they're dealing with family stuff right now. I’m going alone.’

‘You’re lying..’

‘No, and you’re distracting me from getting ready.’ Before I could set my phone down, Gabe’s name flashed across my screen. I contemplating not answering, not only because I knew why he was calling, but also because we had never spoken on the phone before. All of our communication has been through text.

I answered, holding the phone up to my ear. “Yes, Gabriel?”

“I’m just calling because I know what you’re gonna say if I text this to you so I wanted you to know for sure. I’m coming to get you and you’re not going to your appointment alone.”

“Gabe,” I sighed. “That’s really sweet of you but we basically just met a week ago, there’s no reason for you to take time out of your life for me.”

“For the last time, we’re friends, and that’s not gonna change at this point. I’m not taking no for an answer. I’m not going to let you go alone, Y/N,” His voice softened at the end and I paused.

“I’ll text you my address,” I mumbled, deciding that it wouldn’t be bad to have Gabe there. He knew exactly what to say at Tyson’s party, who’s to say he won’t do that at the hospital?

Once we ended the call, I finished getting ready, continuing to pace in my living room as I waited for Gabe. I grabbed an apple to try to distract myself but lost my appetite after the first bite. Luckily, there was a knock at the door. I opened it, seeing a smiling Gabe.

“Hey,” He said.

“Hi, I’m giving you another chance to back out, no hard feelings at all.”

“Shut up,” He rolled his eyes, pulling me into his chest and hugging me tightly. I oddly felt safe in his arms, hugging him back. “You ready to go?”

“As I’ll ever be.” 

****

“Y/N Y/L/N?” The nurse appeared from behind the door. My breath hitched in my throat and Gabe paused in his sentence about Tyson’s locker room antics.

Gabe eyed me before holding his finger up to the nurse. He looked back at me, “Hey, you’re gonna be fine. I’ll be right out here.”

I furrowed my eyebrows at him, staring at him for a second before looking down. “Yeah.”

“Unless you want me to come in with you?” He asked. I blushed slightly, remembering that we had just gotten close a week ago and there is no reason for him to be in the room. But, I still feel like I might fall apart without someone in there. In all honesty, I think I would have fallen apart already if it hadn’t been for him.

“Oh, um, no, that’s okay. You can wait out here,” I stood up. Before I could move, Gabe stood up as well, looking down at me.

He grabbed my hand, eyes moving over my face. “Y/N, if you want me to come in with you, I absolutely will. You don’t have to go in alone, I mean it.”

“Would you?” I mumbled.

He nodded, smiling slightly before wrapping his arm around my shoulder and pulling me towards the nurse. As the nurse took my vitals, Gabe stood off to the side, periodically smiling at me. I couldn't help the butterflies that were flowing around my stomach as he kept his full attention on me.

Once the nurse was done and we were left alone in the room, Gabe spoke up. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m nervous but I just want to know at this point. I’m exhausted from thinking about it.”

He smiled in response but before he could respond, the door opened again and my doctor appeared.

“Y/N, nice to see you again,” She smiled brightly.

“Hi, doctor. It’s nice to see you, too,” I responded. “This is my friend, Gabe.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“You as well.”

“Okay, I figured we should just get right to it. I’m sure this has been on your mind a lot.”

“I’m kind of scared,” I said, my eyes darting to Gabe. He smiled comfortingly at me, squeezing my leg. Holy shit, his hand is on my leg.

“Yeah, I think I’ve never experienced this much anxiety.”

“I’m sorry about that,” She nodded. “But, I do have really good news.”

“Are you serious?”

She smiled, “Yes, the lump is not cancerous at all. You are 100% in the clear.”

“I expected the absolute worse,” I mumbled.

“Most people do,” She laughed. “But, I am going to give you a referral to a dermatologist that can help.”

“Okay, that sounds good.” I nodded. She made up the referral before leaving the room.

“What did I tell you?” Gabe smiled.

“I almost peed myself, I swear.”

He laughed, hugging me tightly. “I didn’t doubt it.”

March 2020

It had been months since my cancer scare and I was back to work. Kacey and Tyson were back and I had told them everything. Kacey freaked but was happy that Gabe was there for me. 

In fact, they were both so happy that Gabe and I became close that they made it their mission to put us together in various situations. Inviting me to a gala where I would have to dress up and see Gabe, check. Split up carpools so Gabe and I were alone, check. Make Gabe and I partners in beer pong, check. Make Gabe and I sit together at team parties, check times 300000.

And now, it’s at the point where I can’t continue to be friends with Gabe. 

“I’m falling for him.”

Tyson paused, smirking. “I knew it.”

“Tyson, it’s starting to physically hurt to just be his friend,” I admitted. “This isn’t cute anymore, it’s a little too real.”

“What are you gonna do?”

“What should I do?” I responded.

“Just tell him,” He shrugged.

“No way.”

“Why not? If you tell him, you get it off your chest. If he doesn’t feel the same way, which you and I both know is not true, at least you won’t feel like your feelings are invisible because you told him and he’s not like that.”

****

Taking what Tyson said, the next day I was standing in front of Gabe’s door. I thought about turning around but Tyson's voice continued to ring in my ears. I knocked three times, breathing after. There’s no turning back now.

The door opened, “Hey!” He smiled widely, “What are you doing here?”

He pulled me into a hug before I could respond. I prayed that he couldn’t feel the thud of my heart in my chest. “I need to talk to you.”

“Okay,” He said, pulling away and looking down at me. “Come in.”

I walked past him into his house, turning back around.

“Do you want to sit? You’re making me nervous.”

“Yeah.” We sat down in his kitchen, him staring intently at me.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” I smiled. “I just wanted to tell you something that I haven’t really been able to get out of my head. You being there for me when I had that scare meant the world to me. For you to just be there during one of the worst times of my life, I can’t even explain how that makes me feel. You’re one of my closet friends and I know that I made jokes a lot about how you didn’t have to worry about me after I got the results, but I knew we would be really good friends by how easily I told you something that was struggling to even tell Kacey.”

He smiled widely, “I’m honored.”

“Ever since then, we’ve just gotten closer and I really do appreciate you and who you are. But, Gabe, this is really not just platonic for me anymore, and I’d rather tell you so that you know.”

He paused for a moment, clearing his throat. “First of all, you know how much you mean to me and you’re one of my best friends. It means a lot to me that you’re telling me this and how you’re feeling. But, Y/N, I am kind of seeing someone, tonight actually.”

“Oh, that’s okay,” I smiled, even though I felt like I had just been punched in the chest for the 100th time. “I just wanted to get it off my chest.”

“Hold on, Y/N, it’s just that I-”

“-No, seriously, it’s okay. I feel like I made things weird. I should go,” I mumbled.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Gabe said, reaching out to grab my hand as I stood up. “Let me finish.”

“No, it’s fine, really. I’ll talk to you later.” 

He looked at me, “Y/N.”

“Gabe, I don’t really want to talk about it anymore.”

He sighed, “Can you call me when you’re ready to talk? And listen?”

I nodded.

April 2020

“Gabe?” I asked, opening my front door. “What are you doing here?”

“When I said I was seeing someone, I meant I had a few dates with this girl EJ introduced me to. I was getting ready to go out with her that night.”

“Gabe, it’s re-”

He cut me off by pushing his way into my home. I closed the door behind him, sighing. “I stopped by her place after you left and told her I couldn't go out with her anymore.”

“What?”

“I met her before we ever really talked and she’s nice but we’d been on at least 5 dates and I still didn’t want to kiss her or anything.”

“You don’t need to explain anything to me,” I mumbled.

“Yes, I do,” He responded. “When we talked at the party, I knew that there was something between us. But I was overthinking so I kept seeing her. I thought you were too good for me. And, I felt like you were going through real shit and I just wanted to be there for you and not push anything.”

“Me? Too good for you?” I scoffed. “Gabriel, you went to a doctor’s appointment to find out if someone you barely knew had breast cancer. You sat in the room!”

“And, I would do anything for you,” He mumbled, stepping closer to me. “This is more than just platonic for me, too, and I would have told you that if you would have called me like you said you would.”

“I thought I embarrassed myself,” I blushed.

“You didn’t,” He smiled. 

“I’m sorry.”

He stepped closer to me, pulling me into his chest and hugging me tightly. “Since when could you not just tell me how you’re feeling?”

“Since I was positive you didn’t feel the same way.”

He laughed, pulling back slightly so that he could look down at me. “Well, you were wrong.”

He grabbed my face, leaning down to press his lips to mine. I smiled against him.

“I want to take you out, on a real date,” He mumbled against my lips. 

“I’d like that,” I kissed him again, right before my front door swung open.

“Well, well, well, what do we have here?” I groaned and Gabe laughed, looking over at his teammate.

“I told you we should have knocked!” Kacey said, following Tyson, who was smirking at Gabe and I.

“Hey, I knew this was coming, I’m not surprised,” He laughed, walking in and making his way into the kitchen. “No pressure, but you guys do look good together and I take full credit.”

“Carry on, we’re just gonna start up in the kitchen,” Kacey smiled sheepishly.

“Start what?” Gabe asked.

“A forced movie night because apparently, I’ve been neglecting them,” I responded. “You should join.”

“I wouldn’t want to get in between your odd trio thing,” He teased. I shoved him lightly. 

“Don’t be rude.”

“I’ll stay,” He smiled. He kissed me again, his arm wrapping around my waist to pull me closer to him. “As long as I get to keep kissing you.”

[safarigirlsp]

Okay you insane sarcastic genius plz answer the following ADCU Q's: 8, 13, 20, & 48 I can't fuckin' wait to see this shitshow lmao😂🖤

8. What do you find really hard to write?

Two things actually.

I can write angst, but I hate it because the entire time I think to myself, you mopey ass fucking bitches just knock your fucking drama off or call the wambulance. Fuck you guys.

Smut can be hard for me to write just in the sense that it’s hard to make it sound new and unique each time! And I have an ongoing count with myself for the number of times I use cock and pussy in fics because there’s just a pretty limited amount of terms, unless you want to dip into shit like Combat Rod and Gloove of Love 🤣. Btw my high count for cock is 32 and pussy is 25 🤦🏻‍♀️. #SHAME.

The fun shit is below the cut

13. What color would your lightsaber be?

People are gonna fucking hate me, but of those shown in the movies, I love color of the sunlight one that Rey had at the end of TROS! However, if I had to pick any lightsaber, it would obviously be Kylo’s bc of its crossguard and feral sparky quality! Ideally, I would mix and match with color and style! I always thought they should have a fire colored one for a villain! That’s what I would like! 🔥🔥🔥

48. What are you looking forward to?

Fuck. I used to look forward to traveling, doing things, and, you know, fun shit! 🤣 Now, it’s more like the end of the plague, wine and a nightly orgasm, and the release date of The Last Duel. I’m a lame ass motherfucker these days.

20. What’s your FMK lineup out of all the AD characters?

Out of ALL the AD characters:

Fuck:

Kylo

Can you imagine how hot that big, scary, aggressive, pent up bastard would be when he comes home from crushing a resistance and killing a horde of enemies?!? Couple that with the fact that he’s always trying to prove himself in every other category in life, you know he’s going to carry that through into fucking you.

He’ll lift you up and fuck you against the wall before you can even rip his clothes off for round one. Round two will be plowing you into the mattress until you can’t walk and can barely breath. For round three, you may be able to convince him to carry you to the shower and fuck you pressed up against the tile.

He’ll have a personal record for the number of orgasms he’s given you in a session and he’ll always be trying to beat his personal best!

Additionally, nothing is going to deter him from fucking you. Period issues? You feel ugly? What the fuck does he care. He’s perfectly willing and eager to get down and dirty and fuck you into the mattress.

Cum at me, Bro.

Marry:

Flip

Shocking, I fucking know.

Diligent. Loyal. Hard working. Tireless. Devoted. Wait, am I talking about in the sheets or on the streets? Because you know those qualities transfer to each setting! He’s also smart, sarcastic, observant, level headed, aggressive, and protective. How fun does all that shit sound?!?

He would absolutely be your Prince Charming as well as any real person reasonably could. Anything you want, he’ll give it you if he can. Big or small, he’ll do whatever it takes to make you smile.

If you want to elope, like I would, Flip would be all in for avoiding a big event with lots of people and obligations. Just the two of you, maybe a couple friends, that’s it. Somewhere in the mountains near Telluride or Ouray, Colorado. It’d be fucking gorgeous.

For the hornymoon, it’d start with a week in a secluded mountain cabin in the same location. Hottub and fireplace are mandatory. Just long days of being fucked and pampered in a beautiful setting until you forget everything but your new last name.

The second week (or longer) would be spent on an uncharted road trip. Just driving around to see various parts of the country that you’ve each always wanted. Uninterrupted time together. Pulling over to fuck in rest stops and seedy motels is a must. Flip will even let you drive. When he wants to give you road head anyway. “Keep those pretty eyes on the road, sugar.”

Kill:

I would kill two, just because I’m bloodthirsty.

Jaime from While We’re Young

That shorts, sandals, dude-ranch-cowboy-hat-wearing motherfucker has the nerve to cheat on his hot ass wife? Fuck that guy. I would choke him the fuck out with his apron strings.

Matt the Radar tech (Not Kylo Ren as Matt the Radar tech lol)

That blonde, poodle haired, goober-ass fucktard. I don’t care if he’s 6’3,” he gives me rabid yappy toy poodle vibes. The kind that old ladies carry in their purses that think they’re hot shit when they snarl at you, as if they could do something. The first time he tries to yell at me, he’s fucking done. I will scalp him and give that blonde toupee to my cats to play with.

Out of the guys I write for:

Fuck:

Gunfighter Flip

I just want to ride off into the sunset with this grouchy bastard. On a horse is fine. On his Horsecock is better.

You better hold the fuck onto something when you saddle up on that horsecock of his, otherwise he’ll buck you right off the bed. You’re not going to get an eight second ride, but he will give you an eight orgasm evening as often as you want it.

He’ll fuck you out under the stars or by a roaring fireplace. He’ll fuck you until he breaks the slats under your mattress. Any way you want it, he’ll fuck you just right.

He loves fucking you in the back corner of a smoky saloon. He’ll sit you right on his cock, nice and pretty, and fuckin’ dare anyone to say a word when he not so subtly bucks his hips, makes you moan too loud, or sucks at your nipple where he’s encouraged it to peek out above your corset. The revolver that he lays on the table in front of him is a warning to anyone who might try to steal a look at your face when you cum on his cock. That’s just for him.

Marry:

Knight Kylo

Not gonna lie, the appeal of having a castle, a kingdom, and a loyal bloodthirsty warrior who will bring the hearts of catty bitches to me is just too much for me to resist.

Loyal. Honorable. Bloodthirsty. Ferocious. Regal. Completely devoted to you. Sign me up.

Your wedding would be the most lavish and decandent affair the country had seen in years. Everyone would come from far and wide to catch a glimpse of the woman who had somehow tamed the beast.

Songs and poems would be written about you. Legends crafted about you and your Black Knight.

But the truly legendary event would be the wedding night. Kylo utterly worships you, and will spend every waking moment making you cum all over his cock, tongue, and fingers until one of you collapses. It won’t be him.

If you think your wedding night is be a one-time event, think again. He will worship you with his cock every night for just as long as you’ll let him. He knows the Queen is the most powerful player on the chessboard and his foremost duty is to serve you in every possible way.

Kill:

Dan

If I’m killing someone intentionally, it has to be Dan. He’s so tired and worn out anyway, I’d sign him up for the Long Goodnight.

Pale

I could also always end up killing someone unintentionally. Pale worries me on that front.

Imagine him coming home at 4am, completely coked the fuck out. His regular guy was stuck in fuckin’ jail, so got some off this punk ass bitch that one of his buddies knows. He wakes you up with his face between your legs, bypassing any of your bitchin’ for being woken up while simultaneously gettin’ you revved up and wantin’ his giant cock.

When he starts fuckin’ you, it’s with all the finesse and vigor of a teenager bangin’ on a brand new drum set. It’s also just as loud to the neighbors.

You cum in minutes. That cock of his always knows how to treat you just right. You feel him stiffen up above you, like he does when he’s about to fill you up. But he doesn’t. He tips the fuck over because your pussy gave that coked out bastard a fuckin’ heart attack.

At least he went out how he always wanted. High as a kite and balls deep in Grade A pussy.

Thanks for this. I hate myself now.

[espinosaurusrexex]

Hater

In which Y/N tries to convince herself that she does not have any feelings for Jeff and miserably fails.

warnings: cursing, a really bad apology (like damn I’m sorry im bad at conversing and it shows lmao)

a/n: For the really nice @ilsolee, who requested something from my Drabble List. Thank you for requesting this. I loved this concept and even played with the thought of breaking it into a series (I ended up not doing that but if you want me to next time, to make it a little longer or even more detailed, just tell me).

As always, I’m open to feedback :)

4. Right now, you’re just being really annyoing.

6. How come you’re still so stubborn, Sugar?

21. Can I kiss you?

word count: 3.8k

She hated him. She hated his dumb smirk and his overly attractive body. She hated the way he talked to her and how he didn't seem to care about people when he interacted with them. His cringy beard triggered her and the muscles on his body intimidated her. There was nothing on this man that could attract her to Jeff Wittek.

Well, those were the points. And Y/N wasn't going to change her mind about this awfully handsome man. At least she didn't want to and found herself relaxing every time she dug a little deeper to find more reasons, why she could hate him. As if him being an ex convict wasn't enough reason to keep a distance, Y/N was intrigued by slipping into his past to be a step ahead for every comment he spat her way. That way she could tell herself that, no matter what he would say to her, she knew something about him that nobody else did. And that gave her the feeling of superiority she seeked a little too often these days.

“What do you think about that, Y/N”, Jeff questioned and raised his eyebrows at her, who had yet to answer his question. There it was again: that stupid smirk. God, she wanted to smack it out of his face every time she saw it. And not the gentle way. The way that would leave a red mark in the form of her hand for several hours. Though it was really hard for her to resist that urge right now, she settled for a snarky comment instead.

“I think that right now, you're just being really annoying.” A low hush went through the room and Y/N noticed Jeff’s face scrunching up in a faked, pained one. He continued to place his hand above his heart before relieving a loud cry. 

“You're so mean! Oh god, I think I have to kill myself now.” The rest of their friends laughed, which made Y/N feel quite uncomfortable. 

“Bohoo, you gonna call your mom now?” Y/N scooched deeper into the cushions as she noticed how childish her behavior had been the whole day.

“Honestly, doll. If you want to upset me, you have to come up with some better roasts. That shit was weak. I feel like I’m arguing with a fifth grader.” Y/N groaned. Another thing she hated about Jeff: him calling her ‘doll’ in that dumb Jersey accent of his.

Sending a growl over to Jeff, Y/N stood up and headed towards the kitchen. She rummaged through the cabinets until she found something to snack her anger away on and proceeded to snatch a water bottle from the fridge. She sat on the counter of David’s kitchen and stared at the white tiles a little longer until she felt a hand on her shoulder and a whiff of strawberry entered the room. Carly. Honestly, Y/N didn't want to talk right now. Drowning her anger in food and tv shows seemed far more appealing to her than engaging in a discussion about her well being or a certain other person she didn't want to think about right now. She knew she had embarrassed herself. Not only today, but all the other times she would start to bicker with Jeff about the most random things.

“Hey Y/N/N…” Carly pushed herself up on the counter next to her and took a cookie from her friend's hand. She knew that Y/N didn't want to talk, but she also couldn't help but wonder what fed the deep hatred her best friend had for Jeff. A man, who had actually been pretty nice and funny to Carly during the time they had known each other. Sure, he wasn't the nicest to Y/N, but that was mainly, because her friend never had anything nice to say towards him, either. Carly would have reacted the same way, if somebody would greet her with such an attitude from day one on. She couldn't bring herself to ask Y/N, though. Knowing deep down that she probably had a good reason to behave the way she did.

A nudge ripped Y/N out of her trance. “Jeff is actually pretty nice, you know?” The platine blonde murmured while glancing back to the living room in which most of their friends gathered at the moment. Jeff shared a short glance with her before turning his attention back to the discussion that was going on. 

“Carly, I’m not magically going to love that guy just because you say he’s ‘pretty nice’.” Y/N chuckled in a mocking manner and turned her head towards her best friend. “I don't like him and that’s final. I find reasons to not like him every day and that is ok. I don't have to like everybody you're friends with. If you want to hang out with a former convict, then do it, but don't expect me to join you again.”

Carly sighed before hopping down from the counter to stand between Y/N’s legs. She looked into her eyes, trying to find a hint of sorrow in them, but nothing. Not even a little bit of dishonesty glimmered in her orbs. She let her head down, shaking it in the process.

“If you say so…” Carly went back to the common area and Y/N was left to sit alone again. She stared at the ceiling for a while and then at the walls. After a couple of minutes, that got pretty boring, so she just decided to leave. She didn’t need them to have fun. And she definitely didn't need to show them how bothered she was by her friends hanging out with people that didn't appreciate her.

It had been a week since her last encounter with Jeff and Y/N couldn't help but feel pretty good about avoiding any situations regarding him. She occupied herself with paperwork and her dog, Dax. Fully ignoring the fact that she felt a little lonely inside, she watched her friends’ Snapchat stories daily. The restaurant she was working at had not been that busy the last couple days, which lead to Y/N getting off early and left to spend even more time in her Apartment, alone, with Dax, of course.

Another week went by and to say the least, Y/N was bored. Her daily routines had consisted of eating, working, and sleeping. She had finished pretty much every series existent on Netflix and there was nothing else to do. She found herself sitting on her phone again. This time, almost envying the fun her friends had without her. But she couldn’t bring herself to text them. She needed to prove it to herself and them that she didn't care if they hung out with people she didn't want around. Mainly, she needed to convince herself, but that facade began to falter with every minute that went by.

A sudden knock on her door echoed through the room and Y/N got up quickly. Too excited that something was happening, she sprinted to the door and basically ripped it open. The handle rammed into the wall and left an evident hole, but Y/N didn’t care. 

“I’m done with your shit ass attitude!” Carly stormed into the apartment with heavy steps and came to a stop at the dining table. The confusion was clearly written over Y/N’s features as she watched her best friend stand in front of her with crossed arms. 

“What do you mean?”

Carly scoffed. An action she had perfected over the years she had known Y/N. “I will not stop hanging out with Jeff, just because you don't like him! Accept that for God’s sake!” Her chest was heaving and Y/N had not seen her friend this furious in a very long time.

The tension between them began to rise, but Y/N wouldn't break. “Well then you have a problem, because I will not ‘hang’ with the devil himsel-” But she was cut off by the blonde.

“Jeff. It’s Jeff! You know, you could actually say his name for once! He’s a human being just like everyone else. And it's not fair that you treat him like shit just because of his background. I didn't think that I was friends with a person that is so selfish and shallow that they would reject people based on the things that happened in the past. We all know what he did! And it's not like he is a killer or psychopath! Especially the people in our group of friends should be able to rely on each other and not be scared that there will be talking behind their back. Because you know what?! That’s exactly what happened with Trisha and now everyone hates her! Do you want that?! Then just say it because I need to know!” 

Her words were like a wake up call. One that hit deep in the gut and spread through the body in hives of pain until it reached the brain and it could actually register what had just been said. Y/N trained her eyes on the floor. If Carly put it that way, it did sound like Y/N had grown into a horrible person. A person, she most certainly didn't want to be. Not in her or anyone else’s eyes. It pained her to see, how wrecked her friend got by the thought of Y/N being like the person Carly had described seconds before.

“Y/N! Fuck! Say something! … God damn it, I need by best friend back and I need to know if she’s still here.”

With that, Y/N couldn't hold it anymore. A loud sob escaped her lungs and the tears followed soon after. 

“I’m so sorry, Carly.” , she sobbed as she tried to stop the tears from falling, “I’m so sorry, I’m a horrible person…”

Through blurry eyes Y/N could see her friend trying to prevent some tears from falling as well, but she kept quiet. Waiting for an explanation on her end. 

“I don’t hate him. I don't hate him for his past or his humor I don't hate him at all. God why is this so hard?!” Y/N kept wiping away the salty wetness on her cheeks and proceeded to talk. “I just thought that… if I told myself that I didn't like him, I would believe myself, eventually. I don't care if he went to jail or prison or whatever. I don't care at all… I just wanted to protect myself and I guess, I went a little too far…”

Silence. It was crushing and if silence had a sound in this second, it would have been something that would make your ears explode. Carly knew, what her best friend meant when she said ‘she wanted to protect herself’. It had been a secret between the two of them, but Y/N didn't exactly have the best relationships in the past. In fact, Y/N and her ex-boyfriends all ended on bad terms. And it had taken at least three month and about five pounds of ice cream or chocolate to make her leave the house again, every time. Y/N didn't seem like it, because of her sassy attitude, but she got attached too quickly and fell way too hard. Carly should have suspected it, seeing that Jeff checked pretty much all of the boxes Y/N’s ex’s did, too. She felt regret rushing through her for throwing those words at her, but she was fairly desperate herself, being without her best friend for over two weeks. They had both been too stubborn to text each other and now they saw what it did to them. They were both devastated and exhausted. It didn't do anyone any good if those two were not together at least once a day.

“You have to tell him.” Carly spoke after ten minutes of remaining silent.

This made Y/N snap her head up again. “I can’t! Not after everything, I have said to him!” Her eyes were wide in shock and she stepped closer to the blonde girl leaning on her table. “Besides, we both know that the last weeks were just foreshadowing of what would happen if Jeff and I would… “ She didn't speak any further, noticing that she had actually said his name out loud for the first time.

“Well, you have to at least say something to him! Apologize. Because whatever is happening right now, is just childish.” 

Carly was right. Y/N hated when her friend was right. And even though it was probably going to be more embarrassing than her fist time, she knew that she had to talk to Jeff.

Believing that nothing would change her mind about said man was probably a stupid thing to do. To say she was nervous to talk to somebody, she had spent the past year insulting, even more so. The whole time, she was so focused on his background and things magazines and haters wrote about him, she had never even considered to investigate further into his personality. Not that she had thought it was going to be any better than her assumptions, anyway. Though, she never had a friendly conversation with him, she had to admit that she had always been the one starting the snappy comments and he probably just followed along.

With that in mind, Y/N stood at a balck door with the number 703 printed on it in gold. How was she going to approach this? She didn't know, either. But she knew that she had to fix it somehow. Y/N wasn't a bad person after all and seeing that she had the opportunity to at least try and fix things, cleared her conscious a little. 

She knocked on the door gently, secretly praying that noone was home and she could just push this event to another day, but her hopes were shattered after a few seconds. The door opened and behind it was the man himself. Shirtless, of course. He had a toothbrush in his right hand and was holding the door open with the other. The light from the window behind him made his body glow in a sunrise-orange tone and Y/N had to scold herself for comparing him to an image of Adonis right there. His questioning facial expression changed to a cocky one as soon as he registered who had been interrupting his morning routine on this day and he moved his body to the side to motion for her to come in. Y/N followed his demands, inspecting his home. Even though she had known him for several months now, she had never even seen his apartment complex before. And looking at the plane walls surrounding rooms that were provided with a minimum of furniture, she decided that she had not missed out on anything. It was the typical man cave. With its lack of decoration and the fminine touch that made every home a home, it appeared rather unwelcoming and cool to her. 

Jeff returned from the bathroom without the toothbrush and went to the fridge to get some water. 

“What did I earn your company with on this fine morning?” Jeff cocked an eyebrow at the woman standing in his living room. It was pretty relaxing that she had not started this morning with an argument and Jeff didn't know it yet, but Y/N was about to surprise him for the second time today.

With that, Y/N turned to him and took his body in one more time before shrugging her shoulders and continuing to look around his apartment. The apology she had planned was weighing on her chest, but now that she was actually standing here with him, alone, she didn't know if ‘I like your shirt’ was the best entry into this conversation. Apart from the fact that he was not even wearing a shirt, it was the best Y/N had come up with for an icebreaker. 

She noticed some dog toys on the floor and decided to settle with that for the start.

“I Have a dog, too.” Y/N motioned to the water bowl next to her and forced a smile on her face to try and hide the humiliation that spilled over her in a giant wave.

Jeff looked into her eyes intently and answered with a frozen expression. “Yeah mine died last week.”

“Oh.” ‘I like your shirt’ suddenly seemd a lot less stupid. Y/N escaped a nervous laugh as she tried to come up with something to say, but Jeff just chuckled after noticing her puzzled expression.

“Just kidding, Nerf’s at the groomers.” A rush of adrenaline filled Y/N veins by those words. He was a dick, but she had to get this over with, somehow. Otherwise, Carly would whoop her ass and send her back to his door, right after and Y/n was not planning on this event to happen.

“Why don't you just tell me something you hate about this place and we take our separate path’s again?” Jeff was serious. He couldn't figure out, why she was here, or what she could possibly want from him, other than a battle of words, he would win anyways. So when Y/N fell silent again, he couldn't help but wonder if this was about something bigger than just another snarky comment.

“No.” Y/N looked away. Too big was the embarrassment she would face in the next minutes, if she was really going through with her plan of apologizing.

They had come so far already, not being caught up in an argument about something inconsequential for the whole time they were in his apartment and jeff could sense the conflict in her mind from a mile away. He was a pretty good liar himself and that subconsciously helped him to read people fairly well.

“How come you’re still so stubborn, Sugar?” A smirk snugg onto his face, again while he approached her from behind, trying to turn her focus to him.

Y/N had shivers running down her spine with those words. There was no denying, anymore. Jeff was an attractive man, but the fact that he knew it, gave her enough reason to not let him know how she felt about him. It was tough, and seeing that he had a dog, left her wondering if there weren't many more things they had in common. 

She turned around and stared up at him. Jeff was dangerously close to her, but Y/N did not attempt to increase the distance between them. It was uncomfortable to say the least, but the things she would say next were uncomfortable, too. Where was the point in changing anything about their current situation when she knew that it only got worse from here on? Exactly, there was none.

“What I’ve been meaning to say is that… I’m sorry. I have been mean to your for the sake of keeping you off my mind and it didn't even work. I just started beef with you, because I was scared. I was scared to face the fact that you are a pretty nice guy and on top of that someone I could actually fall for. You have been nothing but nice to all of my friends and even me. That is, until I started to open my stupid mouth. I’m incredibly sorry, Jeff. I hope you know that everything I said to you was not to be taken seriously. And that I’m not mad at you for the things you said to me. I honestly think, I deserve for those to be tattooed on my forehead for my shitty behavior. I’m… ugh… I’m just sorry and I hope that we can start over. I would love to be your friend if you want that, too. Though, I would understand if you don’t. I’m sorry, I truly am.”

That was a much needed release of pressure, which was crushing Y/N’s soul with every second she had to hold it in. The hardest part was over. Now, she just had to deal with the consequences. And those were something Y/N surely did not expect.

“Can I kiss you?”, was all he said as he searched for her eyes in the glimmer of the morning sun rising outside his windows.

 A shocked expression covered her face. She had just overcome the most embarrassing thing she could imagine and Jeff had totally ignored her. Rude.

“What?”

Jeff chuckled. “It's just, what you just said was pretty hot and I would just like to kiss you right now.”

Noone had ever initiated a kiss this casually and Y/N didn't care anymore at this point. She knew that the second Carly had told her to talk to Jeff, her mission of protecting herself from him and the eventual heartbreak, would be cancelled. And she was a 100% right.

“I guess I have a thing for people apologizing. Especially if they are as pretty as you.” Y/N shivered. That was, in a weird way, the sweetest thing she had heard in a long time and she couldn't help but nod her head ‘yes’.

Jeff didn't hesitate for another second. Too strong was the longing he had felt for her from the second she introduced herself to him months ago. He pushed his lips against hers, forcing her to stand on her tippy toes and locking her hands on his shoulders for support. They shared a closed mouth kiss for a couple of seconds before Jeff grabbed the back of her head with one hand. The other sneaking down her spine and stopping at the small of her back to push her even closer to him. A small whimper escaped Y/N’s lips and Jeff took that opportunity to slide his tongue in her mouth to french kiss. He explored her mouth, not leaving one corner untouched or unappreciated. Jeff was good at it. He was so good at it that Y/N just let herself fall into the kiss and let him take the lead, not even ringing his tongue for dominance. After a couple of seconds, she snuck her hands up his neck and buried her fingers into the buzzed hair on the back of his head. The stubbles tingled her skin and she just melted farther into his body. 

They broke apart after what felt like hours. Both panting, they looked at each other still wrapped into one another. There was a comfortable silence and tension between the two of them that was buzzing in their heads like electricity.

“You know, I always liked you, Y/N. I knew you would drop your act, eventually and just be mine.” Jeff grinned down to her, knowing he had finally won her over.

“Keep up that attitude and I can't promise anything.” Y/N smiled, too. She was willing to see where this was going, but for now she would just live in the moment and enjoy the time, in which no one gave her a reason to worry about anything. Especially not Jeff.

[catwithangerissues]

hello dear! are you still open for matchups? if so, i would like to request one please 🌸 may i request a hq matchup? i would like to be matched with a male character please 🤗

i’m a 5’2 girl with medium, brown hair with highlights. my wardrobe & personal style are like bloomcore x ethereal aesthetics!!

i’m very girly and kind of high maintenance tbh 😳👉👈 but i maintain myself! as an enfj, i’m generally bubbly and cheerful– i like to maintain a chill, happy vibe so i’m more of an optimist too. i want to be that warm and kind friend you have (i’ll be there for you) 🤗 it’s easy for me to vibe with anyone so making friends is quite easy for me! especially if i am interested in that person (either platonically or romantically), i would def approach that person! like i don’t mind if you’re an introvert or an extrovert, i will adjust 🤩✊ i have my chaotic moments too!! so, even though i may look demure and all, my behavior can be wild. bite me, and i’ll definitely bite back rawr 😩💗 i’m also very affectionate to my friends, but most especially my crush/bf– i just like to show em my love for em aHHH tho my social battery drains pretty quickly (netflix and chill >>>> partying) tho i am still very open to new experiences as long as they are not extreme sports or anything too exhausting. i like to think of myself as a planner, but when i am already halfway through my plan, my spontaneous side really kicks in!! well, i guess that’s fun too! in my free days, i like traveling or going on road trips or just going to some place new 🤩 i like learning about diff things/places, trying out new food/experiences, as well as taking lotsa lotsa photos & videos that’s why i find the joy on going on adventures– no matter how random they may seem!! i’m also creative in a way that i really like aesthetic things/places, and i like to express my creativity through photo books, scrapbooks, and travel vlogs 🌸 lastly, i am very busy in school as i am in the honor roll (#hustle!!), so there are times when i’m just so stressed and would be the big baby 😩💗 my top 3 love languages are: physical touch + quality time + gifts. i have my bratty moments too i’m sorry 🥵 pls bare w me i will snap out of it in no time...

that’s all love! tysm xoxo 🥺💗💗

I’d match you up with...

✨OSAMU MIYA✨

Okay okay, I actually think this dynamic would be hella cute. Like super feminine bloomcore girl with Samu? I just think it would be adorable 😌 (side note, I wrote this to Are You Bored Yet? by Wallows and Clairo so do what you want with that info😉)

-He may be the chill twin, but they’re still related, so he’s still a bit of a brat/tease sometimes. He’ll poke fun at you for being short sometimes, but ultimately he can’t help but think it’s absolutely adorable. Except that one time he called you bite sized... he definitely didn’t do that again>:)

-He makes a habit out of patting your head/hair when you ask for a hug cause he likes seeing you puff out your cheeks and pout. He always gives you one shortly after, but he thinks you’re too cute not to tease<3 He also really loves playing with your hair, and he probably compliments how good you smell after every shower- I guess it’s cause he hangs around the gym and club room full of sweaty boys all the time lmao

-Okay, but like I said earlier, bloom core and ethereal you + Samu? Adorable aesthetics and dynamics here people. You always find him subconsciously fiddling with little bits on your clothing. He thinks your aesthetic is so cute, and he’s more than willing to help you maintain that aesthetic<3

-He definitely adores that you’re a cheerful but chill optimist. He enjoys watching you get excited and bubbly, but also loves the times you get super chill. Regardless of how you act or what mood you’re in, he’s always telling you how cute you are <3 He also enjoys hearing about your perspective on life, situations, and different existential questions. He really finds your point of view interesting<3

-Samu loves your affection. He’s not really for or against pda, so long as it’s not extreme of course. He thinks it’s adorable when you run up to hug him and congratulate him on a game they won, and he always throws a smug smirk at Atsu while holding you, just to reaffirm that he’s clearly the better twin- or whatever they’re fighting about this time😉 His favorite affection from you are your innocent subconscious touches, like when you casually fix his hair while talking to him about your day<3 or when you brush your thumb over his hand while holding hands <3

-Samu prefers Netflix and chill over partying just like you do. He is always down to have an indoor cuddle all day and eat food kinda date. He loves getting to hold you or nap with you<3

-Samu is down for any adventure, as long as you’re there. Super early morning beach adventures? He’s down. Midnight skating at the park? He’s there. Want snacks at three am? He’s in love<3

-He is secretly really thankful that you take so many pictures and videos, since he often looks through them when he misses you. He has full albums on his phone of you and your adventures together <3 He definitely made you a photo book or something for an anniversary <3 Oh, and he 100% changes his lock screen to a different picture of you/you two together every week or so <3

-We already discussed how he loves your physical affection, and quality time, but gifts? Hohoho, he loves that. He doesn’t even try to be overly romantic, he just is. Whether it’s buying you flowers, clothing, or even just snacks, he always finds a way to make it super sweet. Like a sticky note with messily written love confessions on top, or buying flowers he knows will match your bedroom so you can take some cute pictures, or a necklace that he just knows you’ll say you can pair with your favorite outfit that you wear so often- which is why he bought it- he loves that outfit on you.

🌱Headcanons, cute couple things, scenarios, whatever else I feel like writing lmao

-You two definitely go on spontaneous road trips and adventures every chance you get

-You two definitely help dye each others hair, and he always kisses your forehead after it’s all washed out and tells you how cute you look🥺(in reference to his grey hair and your highlights)

-He gave you necklace with his and your initials on it <3

-Definitely calls you cute names in his adorable accent like darlin’, pretty girl, princess and hun🥺✨😌

-He always “accidentally” buys hoodies and clothes that he knows you’ll enjoy wearing <3

-He makes playlists with cute titles for you and at the most random times he sends them to you <3

🌱Hope you enjoyed the matchup! Thank you for requesting! I tried to post this 3 different times, thanks Tumblr >:(

[grapesodatozier]

2020 top 5

Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works! 

i was tagged by @tinyarmedtrex !! thank you sm!!

okay so these are all about mike wheeler lmao which tbh is very indicative of the kinda year 2020 was, really just clinging to my favorite comfort character and all of my aus for him for dear life lmao. like i really tried to switch it up but tbh all my best writing is about mike which tracks lol

1. Milk and Honey - wheelzier

I am so proud of myself for how far I’ve gotten in this so far, like ive got an outline and everything?? who am i?? im really proud of my writing and my planning and how much writing i got done in whats a short amount of time for me lol. i wrote this when i had no job and no classes and was feeling v untethered, but @mikewheelerr is an angel and hyped this fic up so much and gave me to motivation to start it and keep with it, so thank you!! i wrote the first 8 chapters at the picnic table in my backyard every day for the last four weeks of my summer vacation, and it was honestly such a special experience. i love these characters and this ship and this story sm and im so excited to keep it going in 2021!! extra thank you to joy bc fr you are so amazing and this fic exists bc of you so thank you thank you thank you <333

2-4 are a trio of mike wheeler high school au pining fics that i banged out consecutively every other day at the end of july?? not sure what i was going through then, think folklore had just come out based on the titles, but whatever the inspiration was im proud of the end results lol so in order of publishing:

2. I Knew You’d Haunt All of My What-Ifs - madwheeler

this is a concept i’d been wanting to write for a while and it is in fact inspired by a real life encounter between me and my boyfriend a few months before we started dating lol so this one’s near and dear to my heart. also im proud of the characterizations here for both of them. and im proud of the setting/atmosphere. also i love mike acting all fussy but not hesitating before helping someone he cares about. madwheeler is a great ship for bittersweet pining lol it works so well for them and i really like the way it turned out here

3. nerd charming - mileven

horrendous title lmao but that’s probably just bc i was so excited to post it bc its so!! cute!! if i do say so myself lol. there is nothing that makes me happier than mileven fluff and this is just them being nerds in english class and having crushes on each other, its pure fluff but i love imagining el in an au and picturing what traits she would still have and what would be different. also both of them being awkward and sweet and nervous around each other, ugh just cute little crushes on each other ): they’re the sweetest ):

4. A Million Little Times - wheelclair

i!! love!! wheelclair!! god they know each other so well, we love that best friends to lovers with the angst and the inevitable fluff. i think this was my first time writing for them but im honestly so happy with the way it turned out, i think i captured their dynamic well while putting a romantic twist on it that feels natural. also im once again v happy with my characterizations. ugh i just love writing about mike working through his feelings and being a dramatic asshole lol. also p proud of the dialogue? i feel like staying true to characters’ voices is one of the hardest things about fanfic and i like to think i did a pretty okay job of it with this fic

5. If These Walls Could Talk - wheelzier

if i could choose a brand to have it would be friends to lovers smut with confessions and fluff that also gets a little kinky lmao. fr i love this fic sm, it’s like a speedrun of my two favorite tropes combined (friends w benefits and fake relationship) since they fake fuck as ~buds~ but then the tension breaks and tbh i love it lol like i said these are my two favorite characters to write, i love them, and i loved writing the banter. I love the fluffy ending with a touch of humor. i love the intimacy and the tension. i love how ridiculous the premise is lmao im so proud of this setup. also theres at least one joke about mike listening to mcr in there which will never not be funny to me lol

as usual i was super late on this lol so im p sure everyone i can think of has already done this, but if you haven’t please do and please tag me!! <3