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#looking at the most mid ass men... swooning
just-spacetrash · 11 months
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i love finding beauty in every single person its the best trait i have
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The Bandit Queen's Bride: The Marketplace (Part 1)
Part 2 coming soon, I promise
~~~
“Tch… I hate the weather here. The buildings in town block the wind from the bay, so it’ll just smell like sweaty fish.”
“Speak for yourself, Merr. The heat makes women swoon, and I quite like it. Easier to woo 'em if they're already weak in the knees.”
“Are you sure it’s not the vile stink of your unwashed ass that makes ‘em swoon?”
“Shut up!”
Jin didn’t bother resisting the urge to roll her eyes. The lads were going to bicker the whole way into town, she could feel it. Already Gelvin and Merr had stopped walking to continue arguing about whose smell was worse. Jin thought they both smelled equally terrible… Then again, chances are that she didn’t smell much better. It’d been a couple weeks since her last proper bath--wiping her body down with damp rags could only do so much.
“M’queen, should we… I’unno, stop them, or something?”
The Bandit Queen glanced sideways at tiny little Miski, then spun on her heel mid-step to begin walking backwards, allowing her to focus on the arguing men. They seemed oblivious to being left behind by the others. She considered leaving them there aside the road… But then she’d never hear the end of it from Gallum, and her head already ached too much today to deal with the grumpy old man scolding her like a child. Plus Miski was giving her that doe-eyed, pleading look… The one she hated… The one that always worked.
With a heavy, perhaps exaggerated sigh, Jin changed the direction of her steps, heading back down the road. The argument had already shifted away from arguing about body odor; they had started fighting over who’d been with the most women. Unable to resist, the queen threw her arm around Merr’s shoulders, nearly knocking the scrawny man over.
“You louts ain’t ever gonna’ top the number of women I’ve had. No point in comparin’ numbers if you’re always out of first place. Now stop laggin’ behind or I’ll string you both to Tore’s saddle and send him running.”
Both men had the sense to look contrite. Merr grumbled a halfhearted “Yes m’queen,” then he stumbled away after being pushed toward Miski. Gelvin needed no such shoving--not that she could have moved him if she tried. Where Merr was lanky and close to her own height, Gelvin was practically a mountain of a man. She could shove her whole weight against him, and he might not even notice. Still, the Bandit Queen had no need for force. He was already following Merr down the road.
~
They made it to town without further delay. The lads might have begun to argue again, but Miski was an expert at distraction. Every time they got heated, she chirped about how excited she was to be surrounded by strangers again, her fingers itching to slip into new pockets and relieve them of their burdensome gold. She was especially adept at distracting Merr, using his particular affection for her to great effect. By the time they reached the port town, Merr had already agreed to obtain a pretty ring and some candies for Miski.
Jin lagged behind a bit once citizens began filling the space around them. The others already knew the plan: Miski would look around, taking note of any soldiers and possible targets; Gelvin would investigate temporary job prospects on the dock; and Merr would poke around the town inns, gathering any interesting gossip that might be useful. As for the Bandit Queen… She headed right to the market square to meet up with Gallum.
~
The sweltering heat was at its worst in the market. Bodies crowded together in the bright summer sun, sweat and spices and fish and salty ocean air mingled together with the ceaseless din of merchants shouting their wares while customers chattered and bargained. Gallum was glad for the meager relief of shade cast by his stall canopy. He was so old that even sitting hurt his joints, and all he wanted to do was watch life pass him by. A nice, cool glass of cider to wet his weathered lips wouldn’t hurt…
He spotted Jin long before she was close enough to reach him. She cut too imposing a figure to be hidden amidst the common rabble. Her long strides were cut short by the press of bodies, leaving her visibly irritated by the time she plopped down to sit beside him on the threadbare cushion. Gallum offered her half of a tiny red apple, but she pushed it back toward him.
“Nah, you eat it. S’got your gross mouth all over it already, I bet.”
With a chuckle, he took a bite, then used the apple-bearing hand to gesture at the crowd.
“Busy mornin’. Already sold out all them apples we appropriated, and I got a gentleman comin’ back later to buy that necklace Mitski lifted from that farmer’s wife last week.”
Jin eyed him skeptically as he spoke. He could pinpoint the exact second that her natural cynicism gave way to the more rational acknowledgement that he would never lie to her. Gallum was her oldest supporter, perhaps her oldest friend… Besides, the empty stall shelf was proof enough that everything had been pawned off. He reached under the cushion to withdrawn a small pouch, handing it to the Bandit Queen for inspection. The pouch was stuffed with gold bits, far more than the apples naturally should have been worth. Jin’s smile was sly as she counted a few pieces out of the pouch.
“You never disappoint, Gallum. These dullards’ll never know how much they overpaid.”
She tucked the pouch beneath the cushion again, keeping six bits in her hand.
“I’ll buy ya’ some cider. Stay here and relax. Gelvin’ll come by once he’s done.”
Gallum doubted he’d see the giant lad before the end of the day. Even if he finished his task quick, he’d likely linger at the docks to gamble with sailors. Jin reluctantly stood and stepped out of the shade… Then she froze to the spot. His attention snapped to the queen, then followed her line of sight across the market. From his spot on the ground, he couldn’t see what she saw… But he understood her reaction when she breathed “Blessed fuckin’ stars,” before making her way to the target, face flushed a deep crimson. The Bandit Queen has spotted a pretty girl, and Gallum wouldn’t be seeing her until tomorrow morning.
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Hi there! Narcos anon…so sorry! I didn’t realize saw a photo on a moodboard and must’ve gotten confused. Apologies.
Would you consider doing it for Star Wars? Poe Dameron?
bandaging/stitching up an injury
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A/N: Not a problem, it happens. I just like Pedro Pascal's face and thought he'd be great as one of my OCs. Also, thank you. I've missed Poe.
Word Count: 964
There were times you really hated being a medic. Yes you saved lives and were, for the most part, away from the direct fighting, but every now and again one particular soldier would get to you, or in this case, pilot.
Poe Dameron was infuriating. It didn’t matter if he had gotten a cut while fixing his ship or shrapnel stuck in his side, he always gave you that same stupid easy smile promising it wasn’t as bad as it looked.
You were the damn medic. You would decide how bad it was!
What’s worse, he was nice. Cocky sure, but he did listen to you. He also made sure to thank you and give other patients lip if they talked back to you in front of him.
Why did he have to do that? Why couldn’t he just be another hot shot pilot who thought he was all that and a bag of chips? It would make your job so much easier if your heart didn’t squeeze with worry every time he walked through the door or your hands didn’t tremble when you bandaged him up.
You were a professional. You didn’t swoon over men, no matter how charming they were. So why was Poe so different?
“Something on your mind?” Poe asked, pulling you from your thoughts.
You realized, much to your embarrassment, how your hand had paused mid-way through wrapping his arm.
The only explanation he had given for this particular visit was “rough landing”. He hadn’t suffered a concussion, luckily, but he was still pretty banged up. You had patched up pretty much everything else, leaving just this last gash in his arm.
Giving Finn his jacket was a kind gesture and all, but you wished he’d just pick a new one. Leather would at least serve as some protection.
“I’m thinking, you’re lucky I do this out of the goodness of my heart. Otherwise, your visits alone would have paid for an upper apartment of Coruscant by now.”
“Oh c’mon, I’m not that bad.”
You frowned, pointing to one of several scars on his body.
“Crash landing. Blaster fire. Knife wound. And this one is the special variety of “Jess dared me to”. And those are just the ones I can see. I know you’ve got a few more on your ass.”
His face broke out into a wide grin. “You think about my ass?”
You didn’t say anything, instead, tying off the bandage a little harder than necessary, causing him to wince.
“Okay, okay, I deserved that. It was uncalled for.”
“Damn right it was,” you grumbled. “And I don’t want to see you in here for at least another week unless you’re getting something for the pain.”
“Don’t tell me you’re getting tired of me already,” he teased.
You could feel your cheeks go hot as he shot you that oh so charming smile of his. You covered it with a shake of the head.
“I’ve got other people I gotta look after besides you. I’m not your personal nurse, you know.”
His smile faltered, his expression turning a little sheepish. “I know.”
Your stomach gave a small twist of guilt. “Look just, try to be more careful, will yah? If anything, it'll make my job a lot easier.”
“Fair enough,” he said, and some of the brightness returned to his eyes. “A week is a long time to go without seeing you though.”
Your brow furrowed, as you stared at him. “Commander Dameron, was that your attempt to make a pass at me?”
“That depends, when are you off?”
Your mouth fell open. “What?”
“I would like to know when you’re off shift so I can take you on a date,” he said, slowly so you wouldn’t miss it. “You know, that thing two people do when they like each other and want to get to know the other better? Or…there is a strong case to be made that you don’t like me. In which case, you are a much grumpier person than I thought you were and I misread a ton of signals.“
You shook your head, finally starting to process all the words he had just thrown your way.
“You like me?”
“Yeah,” he said, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. “Is that so hard to believe?”
“A little, yeah,” you admitted.
“Really? I thought I was obvious.”
You shrugged, trying to hide the sudden lightness in your stomach and chest. “Well I guess I’m not as good at reading signals as you are.”
Poe grinned. “So I was right. You do like me.”
You rolled your eyes. “Yes Dameron, I like you.”
“Yes!” He did a small fist pump only to hiss in pain by the sudden jerky movement.
You couldn’t help but laugh, just a little, before sitting down beside him again to check on the bandage.
“I did say take it easy on this arm,” you reminded.
“Yep, you did,” he groaned. “I might need that thing for the pain a little earlier than I thought.”
You handed him the bottle of pills, making sure he took at least one before helping him off the table.
“I still haven’t gotten an answer on that date,” he said, wincing as he straightened.
“I’m off in three hours. And I’ll only go if you spend that time in your bunk trying to rest up.”
“That I can do,” he promised. He then leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to your cheek. “See you in a few.”
You stood frozen, your heart pounding as Poe gave you one final easy smile before walking out the door.
As soon as he was out of sight, you felt able to breathe again. Your head was spinning.
God damn that man.
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simp-ly-marvelous · 2 years
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Rant Ahead-
The dudebros complaining about the most recent She Hulk post credit scene is so fucking hilarious to me because these guys are the densest motherfuckers out there.
Like, on one hand you’ve got all these grown ass men whining and crying over a POST CREDIT scene for a fun character from COMIC BOOKS in a FICTIONAL world throwing it back with Megan Thee Stallion. Like,, everything else that has happened thus far within the MCU was fine and excusable but god forbid that She Hulk twerks, like what??? “But it’s cringy” man shut the hell up, what’s cringy is you being a bitch baby over something as harmless as this.
Which bring me to my next point, it’s the M FUCKING C U. It’s GOING TO BE CRINGY. She Hulk dancing is the least of your worries you dumb fucking bitch. Look, I enjoy MCU movies, I do, but I’m not going around pretending like it’s peak cinema. They’re entertainment, they’re movies to just watch and enjoy and to provide you with an escape to a more marvelous universe than our own. It’s YOUR own fault that you have this ideology that MCU movies are on some pedestal and therefore things like women dancing in one single scene brings it off that high and mighty pedestal. Get a life!
Then on another hand they show what little comprehension and critical thinking skills they have (big surprise there) by comparing this post credit scene to a comedy lawyer show to big climatic events that took YEARS in the making, such as Tony’s sacrifice and whatnot and say shit like, “Oh, what a downgrade.” Like no? That’s not how this works? The end credit scene where Captain America stood in front of a white screen and talked for like two minutes was fine but She Hulk can’t dance with Megan Thee Stallion?? We have She Hulk throwing it back on screen with MEGAN THEE STALLION and you want to COMPLAIN???
Am I saying that She Hulk is perfect? No, I’m not. However, this ongoing pattern of the dudebros continuously complaining about Phase Four projects is so frustrating and hilarious at certain times. Like if these fictional shows about made up characters from comic books you most likely don’t read really bothers you, then do everyone a favor and actually commit to your comments of, “I’m not watching another MCU thing again.” They keep saying shit like that yet they keep coming back. “Mid. I’m not watching this shit.” Okay?? So don’t?? How about you go get a hobby or something? Or if you don’t like canon take to fanfic like everyone else you privileged bitch.
One day I just hope that stuff like Marvel and Star Wars becomes so diversified that it gets rid of dudebros as a whole.
I hope that there is just so much queerness and color in mainstream media that all these cishet (mainly white) men just leave their toxic selves out of the fandom and its space. Man, I WISH the MCU was as diverse as they’re making it out to be. Boohoo there’s a woman on the screen, aw waa-waa someone who isn’t European looking, oh no a two second clip of something gay that can be easily edited out for other countries? Goddamn.
Anywho, that’s just a little rant because I can’t believe people were upset over seeing She Hulk twerk. I thought it was great, I loved it. If they had her being her muscular comic book self I think I would’ve physically swooned, but nothing’s perfect.
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bokettochild · 3 years
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The Worries and Woes of Heroic Hair
Y'all were busting out hair headcannons before I left, so I saved a few and wrote a fic for them.
Featuring:
Pre-maturely grey Twilight
Curly haired Legend
Long haired Four
(As well as a reference to long hair Sky)
Warriors had gained the unfortunate title of ‘pretty boy’.
In a group of beautiful men and boys that literally sent women swooning, no matter what world they were in, he’d somehow been labeled the “pretty” one. Never mind he was more mature looking than half of their number. Never mind that Legend and Hyrule looked like a pair of porcelain dolls hand painted by a master artist. Never mind that Wild literally had half of his world falling heels over head for him. No matter how many women in the War of Ages had gushed about the adult Hero of Time (much to Mask’s annoyance). And sure, let’s just forget that Wars had heard not one, but two princess’s complimenting Twilight’s ass.
Yeah, okay, he was the pretty boy, sure.
Maybe that was because he was the only one in the group that actually had any understanding of a little thing called personal hygiene! Honestly! Had no one introduced the vet to a bathtub when he was younger? Or Wild to a hairbrush? And Hyrule... oh Hyrule...
Honestly, it was a pain, trying to not say something to his brothers that might be taken as rude or offensive. At least his own two boys were a bit better. During the war he’d pounded some sense into their heads after scrubbing their ears clean enough that they could actually hear him when he spoke, and Time and Wind both showed some (although not much more than the others) level of personal grooming, even if it was the basic wash and brush that Wars had required of all of his soldiers.
The others though? He had been beginning to think they might be hopeless, but then he’d had a chance to do something about it.
“Wars?”
“Hmm?” Bright blue darted up from the journal Warriors had been writing in, meeting Wind’s pout with a soft chuckle at his baby-faced brother. One day, Wind would be as grizzled and scruffy as his grandfather (would be his grandfather) but for now he would take him time teasing the kid for his baby-face. After all, it wasn’t like he’d be getting another chance to get revenge on the man who’d teased him up to his wedding day for his “lack of masculine charm”.
“My hair is knotted. In the back.” Wind didn’t even bother waiting for a signal, instead just plopping down in the captain's lap and dropping a brush by his knee. And really, with how the war had gone, Warriors should have expected that.
Any injury that impeded movement meant Wars was helping his two boys with whatever was needed during the war, and near the top of that list had been brushing hair. Broken arm or sprained wrist or whatever Hyrule had diagnosed it as (he’d been a bit too wrapped up in helping hold Wild still so he and Legend could treat the kid’s crushed hand to hear the healer’s final word), he was always happy to help the younger hero sort out his problems.
At least Wind let him help, instead of sending him scandalized looks and rude signs at the mere mention of a bath, like Legend did, or simply darting away like Hyrule.
“Wind,” Sky frowned slightly. “You didn’t have to disturb Wars, any of us would have been willing to help.”
The sailor cocked a brow, leaning back into his touch as he worked over the knot with nimble fingers well accustomed to working through tangled golden curls. “Says the Hero of Eternal Bedhead.”
Crystal blue eyes darted up to messy bangs. “Is it really that bad?”
“Yes.” Sailor and captain deadpanned together, matching grins on their faces as they stared at the Skyloftian.
“Oh feathers.” Sky huffed, running his hands through his hair and looking at the two expectantly. “Is that better?”
Wind snorted. “Sky, you need a hairbrush for your bird’s nest.”
“But,” Sky cocked his head like a confused puppy. “I don’t have a bird’s nest?”
“He means that your hair is a mess.” He chuckled, pausing in his work to pat the ground at his side. “Here, I’ll do you next, ‘kay?” And bless Sky for being a patient and reasonable person, because at the very least the Skyloftian just sauntered over easily and sat hot-cross-buns on the ground beside him, watching lazily as he worked at the sailor’s messy hair.
“It’s not that bad,” The Sailor huffed. “You can’t honestly be taking this long.” The kid wasn’t fooling him though, Wind was leaning into the touch, almost slumped against his chest in a boneless pile of teenager.
“You’re dry as a desert.” He scolded softly in response, rubbing some of the bristly hair between his fingers. “I’ve told you salt water dries your hair out, you need to take care of it or it’ll never grow out properly.”
Wind shifted awkwardly. “I didn’t have time. I did try, I mean it! It just... We’re always so busy and...”
His hands were already reaching for his pack. “You’re lucky mine dries out too. I’ll need to get more in the next town, but I think this oil can last us both long enough to get you some again.”
“Oil?” Sky frowned thoughtfully. “What for?”
“Split ends and dry hair.” Came the practiced answer as he rubbed the substance in question over his hands and began to card it through the sailor’s parched curls. “I suppose you could say it’s like with birds. They have to oil their feathers to stay healthy, right?”
“Oh! Okay, yeah, that makes sense.” The Skyloftian mulled over the concept for a moment. “We need to do that to our hair?”
Long fingers stopped mid stroke, royal blue blinking slowly in the clueless sky child’s direction. “Oh, you poor, clueless bird-boy you, your hair must be parched!”
Wind’s giggles shook them both, but Sky simply looked hurt. “I try. How was I supposed to know?”
Fingers slick with hair oil curled to point at the other hero. “I am massaging this stuff into your thirsty scalp right now. Wind, move.”
The sailor tumbled, giggling from Wars’ lap, leaving Sky to stare down at the captain’s crossed legs. “I’m- Warriors I am not sitting in your lap.”
“I don’t expect you to.” Brush in one hand and bottle of hair oil in the other, Warriors moved to stand behind the Skyloftain. “Just stay right there and let me work, and I swear if someone else tells me to my face that they’re not taking care of themselves- Sky! Look at this!”
The Skyloftian shifted, trying to look for only a moment before huffing. “Warriors, I can’t see the top of my own-”
“When’s the last time you trimmed this?” Brittle tips crinkled under his fingers as he stared at the mess that was Sky’s hair. “Your split ends are horrible!”
“Crimson usually trims it for me.” Came the softly mumbled response, and Wars had to hold back an affronted squawk at the words.
“You’re entrusting the care of your hair to a bird? Sky, my lovely, my dear friend, my brother, what the actual Ladies?”
“He does a good job!”
“If you call this rat’s nest a good job! Honestly, it’s no wonder Legend finally agreed to let you cuddle him, he must feel right at home with this mess!”
“Ouch.” Sky huffed, crossing his arms loosely and pouting.
“That aside,” He began working the first knot out, fluffing Sky’s hair lightly in his fingers. “It’s a good color, nice volume too. Have you ever considered growing it out? Without the split ends?”
“Huh?”
Caramel hair parted easily in his hands, springy and soft despite the brittle ends. “You’d look fetching with long hair, Chosen One. My, imagine what Sun would say if she saw you!” Sky stiffened as the soldier ducked down, voice lowering and eyes glinting with mischief as he whispered in his friend’s ear. “If she wasn’t already swooning at seeing you again, she’d be dizzy at the sheer beauty.”
“Wars!” Long ears twitched, tellingly red as the Skyloftian battled a fierce blush.
But the captain was already lost in his rant, taking pleasure in making Wind continue to giggle as Sky whined softly in protest at his teasing. “I can see it now! You arrive fresh out of battle, sword in hand and hair whipping in the wind, cape swirling like the wings of the goddess herself! She sees you. Your eyes meet. You shoot her one of your dashing smiles and she stumbles back, breathless, and you have to dart forwards to catch her before she swoons away altogether, so bedazzled she is by your handsome visage!” He flourished with a smile, letting oiled locks fall over Sky’s eyes with a laugh as the Skyloftian blushed brighter, not bothering to shift his bangs and instead hiding behind them, trying and failing to hide a pleased smile.
Wind didn’t stop giggling until Sky had had to punch the captain in the leg to make him finally cease the teasing.
“Smithy,” Twilight’s laughter rung through camp as he brushed long bangs out of the smithy’s eyes, the younger hero still smushed against the rancher's side sleepily, headband askew and half hanging in his eyes. The boy’s hair curtained his face, falling back into place the moment Twilight lifted his hand again, producing rumbling laughter form the farm-hand. “Four, you- when in Ordonia’s name did you last trim your hair?”
“’s not that long.” Came the murmured reply as Four pressed his face further into Twilight’s side, nestling closer with an irritable huff. “Leave ‘lone, Twi.”
The smithy might have denied it but... his hair really had grown out.
It wasn’t really that apparent with the headband keeping it back, and Four was decent enough at keeping his hair out of his face. But headbands, no matter how trusty, didn’t stay up forever, and when one was as active as a Hero of Courage, it wasn’t uncommon to find one’s self with their hair swinging loose in battle. Not that most of them minded, Wild kept his hair tied carefully and Legend tucked all of his under a hat, meanwhile the others all had shorter locks that, other than the swishing of their bangs, mostly stayed out of their faces.
Four on the other hand...
Four’s headband had fallen loose into a mud puddle, and until he was able to clean it the smithy had been walking around like a sheepdog, bangs fluffing into his eyes and making the shortest hero huff in an annoyed manner as he kept swiping his bangs aside. Unfortunately, they weren’t long enough to tuck behind his ears, only to hang in his face and send him stumbling over and into all sorts of things with sharp yelps and soft swears as the hero closest to him would have to offer a hand or scoop up the small smithy again.
Wars didn’t say anything, but when Four finally approached him one evening, eyes flickering icy blue as he dashed his bangs out of the way and tugged at the scarf draped around the captain’s neck (the others’ favorite way of getting his attention he had found).
“Hey there, smithy, what’s up?”
“Cut them.” Four huffed, pushing the loose hair back again only to have them drift back over his glinting eyes, and then, as if an afterthought, he tacked on ‘Please?’.
Royal blue darted up to Sky, who smiled on the edge of the campfire, a knowing look in his eyes. “Did Sky tell you I could help?”
“No. I figured that out myself. He just... pushed me.”
Laughter bubbled up in his chest. “Ah.”
“So, can you help? Or do I need to wander around looking like a Mogma?” Sky could be heard muttering across the camp at that, and Four’s ears twitched as he huffed, clearly having taken offense at whatever had been said.
He nodded, a bit unsure why Four glared across the fire at Sky, but willing to help. Oh goddesses, was he willing to help; Four’s hair bugged him nearly as much as Wild’s did, and he had been dying to fix it for the smithy. He wasn’t sure what Sky had said, but he was thankful for the other knight’s willingness to aid him in his battle against poor hygiene, and if he could turn another hero with the power of a good haircut, well! “Anything you have in mind? Just what you had before, or...?”
“Bangs.” Four dropped down hot-cross-buns, just like Sky had the other day, in front of him, arms crossed and expectant as he huffed at his long bangs.
“Right.” His brush and scissors were already sitting at the ready as he reached out to gently push the hair out of his friend’s eyes. “You good?”
“Annoyed.” Four sulked. “I can’t see anything and Twilight has been called me a sheep-dog.” Accurate. “I just want my hair short again, but the last time I cut it, it looked like I was attacked by a cat.” The smithy shivered, clutching at his sleeves as he shook his head, hair falling back into his eyes as he did so. “I just let it grow after that, but the bangs bother me if I can’t push them back.”
“Noted.”
Four’s hair was a bit silkier than the others’, but similarly brittle, although that was likely due to the heat of the forge rather than sea salt and extended time in the sky. He didn’t even bother asking about oiling the locks as he worked, brushing out all of Four’s hair with care and sectioning out the bangs with the same amount of agonizing detail Legend put into his paintings or Wild put into his cooking.
“Hair cut?” Twilight called from across camp.
“You could use one too,” Four huffed, unmoving save for his eyes darted to glance over his shoulder. “Your hair is beginning to look like wolf ears, rancher. Wolfie might take offense that you’re stealing his look and come maul you.”
Chuckles sounded around the camp, Legend wheezing lightly while Time and Wild shared a look. Wars didn’t know what that was about, but he smiled as he worked, humming lightly under his breath as he clipped a bit here and a touch there, releasing the hair to stare at it, adjusting it a bit, taking another section in hand and snipping it, and repeating the whole process.
Four was still as a statue the whole time, occasionally humming along to whatever tune happened to be on Warriors’ mind at the moment, but otherwise as poised and picturesque as a statue as the captain worked over the smithy’s blond locks.
This close up, Warriors was beginning to wonder why they never met any lovely admirers of the smithy, Four was certainly not lacking in the looks department, and had the kid lived in his time he’d find himself having to beat off girls with a stick. Honestly, how was he the pretty boy here?
“Nearly done?” Came the patient hum, and he snapped himself back to reality as he brushed Four’s bangs back into place, trimmed and tidy, along with the rest of his short hair.
“Yep.” The scissors finally came to rest in his lap as he whisked away the cloak that he’d used to catch the trimmed hairs. “My, my, smithy, you almost look as if you were going courting! Legend, lend a man your shield for a tick, would you? Four needs to see his new cut.”
The veteran rolled his eyes, but the shield was offered readily enough when Four trotted his way over, and while the smithy looked a bit surprised that Wars had bothered to braid most of his hair out of the way during the cut, he didn’t look at all displeased.
Wars counted that as a win.
He’d run out of oil a few days ago, and already his hair was beginning to frizz in this thrice-forsaken heat.
Being born with curly hair was nothing of the blessing his mother had made it out to be, no matter how she liked playing with her ‘baby boy’s’ hair. Of course, his beloved liked it too, but he was going to chalk that up to being a woman thing, curls were a pain if they weren’t on kids, especially if they were eon him.
Thank Hylia that Lilith had taught him to straighten it all out, he would have been driven half out of his mind if he hadn’t been able to control it on his way through basic, and the teasing would have been so much worse than it actually had been.
As was, the captain was only too happy when they next came to his Castletown, and after he’d made sure the others were settled in the castle with his cousin, he’d gracefully made his exit and headed out to the town. Getting through the streets was a pain, his armor and scarf giving him away as the hero and practically inviting the whole market to start competing for his attention, along with the hundreds of shoppers who surged close with questions and thanks and admiration. Not for the first time, Warriors found himself thankful that he handled crowds better than many of his fellow soldiers, and even if all the attention was a bit much, he wasn’t overwhelmed like poor Wild would have been.
Oh heavens, the day they finally figured out how to explain the portals and heroes nonsense to the public to excuse the sudden aging of the Hyrulian Hero’s child, Wild was likely going to have to start wearing a hood or something when they went into town.
The dye shop was a way into the market, and it had taken quite the bit of fancy footwork to avoid stepping on anyone as he’d answered questions and received thanks from the enthusiastic, if not slightly push, people of Hyrule. If he closed the door of the shop after him with a sigh of relief though, that was between him and Gyssel, the shopkeeper.
“Back again, Link? Same materials as the last time?”
“If you please.” He nodded with a smile. “Though I might have a bit of a glance around, I’ve a friend in need of a few things.”
The old woman nodded with a chuckle. “Right then. Oh, and if you see those two lovely gents who popped in here earlier, would you be willing to lend ‘em a hand? Poor dears looked lost as two minish in a fairy pond when they stumbled in here, but I’ve been batting a thousand with the customers all day and haven’t had a chance to pop over and offer help. You know the shop same as I do, so, if you have a moment, could you check in on them while I wrap your things?”
“Of course.” He nodded, smiling his best as he moved towards the back wall.
The other voices in the shop were mostly those of tittering ladies and mischief making pranksters, all too young and too high to belong to the ‘lovely gents’ that Gyssel had been speaking of, and it wasn’t hard to trail the rumble of a man’s voice to the back of the store where the hair dyes were. He grinned as he rounded the corner, but froze when he found himself face to face with a startled, and maybe somewhat abashed rancher.
“Twilight?”
“Warriors?”
“Shit, Wars is here?”
Royal blue darted down to meet the snapping violet of the veteran. “Legend? What are the two of you doing in here of all places? Are you lost?”
“No.” Legend huffed, foot tapping agitatedly at the floor as he gnawed his bottom lip, a sure sign of awkwardness if one knew the vet.
“What are you doing- oh.” Twilight’s face faded from confusion to understanding. “You’re the city boy, of course you shop in joints like this.”
He cocked a brow, hands coming to rest on his hips as he stared down the two other heroes. “Says the guy who’s been wandering around looking for something long enough the owners worried. Honestly, what could the two of you even need?”
Midnight and violet glanced warily at each other, and to his surprise, twin flushed lighted his friend’s faces as Legend had crossed his arms and Twi had rubbed at his neck.
“Hair dye.” The rancher admitted softly.
“And shampoo.” Legend had tacked on.
Warriors let his eyes blow wide an overdramatic gasp sounding in the small corner of the shop as he rested a hand on his collar. “Why, vet, you don’t mean to tell me you’re planning on actually taking a bath, are you! My heavens, what next? Will Hyrule somehow produce a wedding cake in time for Time and Malon to announce they’re having a baby?”
“They’re what!?!” Twilight yelped, sounding, ridiculously, like a dog that has just been kicked.
“I’m teasing, rancher.” He chortled. “Trust me, if Time knew of such a thing, he wouldn’t have shut up about it. Miss Malon’s still trim and terrifying as last we saw her; I have little doubt.” At the rancher’s breath of relief, he shook his head. “Honestly though, soap? Vet, last I checked-”
“It’s hot.” Legend interrupted, avoiding meeting his gaze by rolling his eyes.
“And?”
“And in case you didn’t know, our resident vet is a-”
“Don’t say it!” Legend huffed, glaring at Twilight and tugging his blue cap tighter over his head.
Come to think of it, Legend hadn’t taken the baby-blue cap off in ages...
“Is a what?”
Twilight looked down warily at the seething veteran, face twisted up between a playful grin and a wary frown, as if he didn’t yet know whether he wanted to tease and face the vet’s wrath or hold his tongue and avoid making a scene.
“Look,” Warriors sighed, glancing between the two country boys with a sigh. “I won’t tease at all, alright? But the sooner you own up to whatever nonsense you did to yourself, the sooner we can find you what you need and get ourselves out of here.”
The flush on Legend’s face darkened, eyes darting down as the vet shuffled his feet, and Wars found himself being reminded that for all the vet’s snark and sass, he really was as much of a kid as Wild and Wind were, just more accustomed at having to act otherwise.
Thin fingers rubbed at the rings on the vet’s pale hands. “Well, you see- that is- augh!”
Something inside him blossomed with warmth, a smile stretching across his face. Golden Three, Legend really was just an awkward teenager, wasn’t he? He even stumbled over his words when he was embarrassed, just like Time used to. Of course, Time had been twelve and Legend was nineteen, but that was beside the point.
“So-” The vet was nearly pouting as he struggled with his words, fingers rubbing steadily at his rings as he avoided Wars’ gaze. “You know how Ravio has curly hair?”
“Yes.”
“And you know how Ravio and I are- uh, each other's- reflect-”
A laugh bubbled out of his throat unexpectedly as he reached out to ruffle what could be seen of the vet’s frizzy bangs. “You’re a curly top! Why didn’t you say sooner?” Legend glared at him with a huff, but violet didn’t shift to indigo, so he knew it was all just an act. “Wind and I are too, I was actually in here to get some things for the two of us, and Sky too. I can help you as well if you don’t mind, just let me-” He motioned to the blue cap that was pulled snig down to Legend’s ears.
The vet huffed, but reached up to finger the blue fabric. “You won’t laugh, right?” Stern eyes met his own.
“Of course.” He smiled reassuringly.
Legend’s gaze searched his face for a moment, wary, but open, and even if it made him uncomfortable (the odd glint of gold at the edges of the vet’s eyes was a bit unsettling) he withstood it until Legend nodded, seemingly to himself, and pulled off his cap.
Pink curls spilled down to the vet’s shoulders as a bright blush colored pale cheeks. Twilight didn’t make it any better by reaching over to ruffle the vet’s head, chuckling soft and warm and surprisingly fond as Legend hissed back at him.
“Can I- that is- do you mind if I touch? I can help you find what you want better if I know what you need.”
A stiff nod.
The pink hair was just like fairy-floss, but less sticky (still dirty though) and he had to remind himself what he was doing once he got his fingers in it. A quick check at the texture and ends of Legend’s hair, as long as a quick check of the scalp and roots told him all he needed.
“Whatever dye you used to do this messed you up, vet. Honestly, I don’t know what you were thinking, but you’re dry as a mulduga’s arse. Did you bleach your hair before dying it or something?” There was a murmur in reply, but not anything he could really make out. “I’m sorry, what?”
“I said that’s me natural color.” Legend huffed, tensing under his hands. “I bleached it blonde a few months back, but no, I didn’t dye this shit, it just happened.”
Twilight, very unhelpfully, giggled.
Warriors blinked. “You have pink hair?”
“Yes.”
He fought the chuckle that built up in his chest, but it did little good as he ruffles the frizzy curls and let Legend replace his hat. “Alright then! Well, I’d avoid bleaching again if I was you. The pinks out and it’s healthier if you give it a rest between dyes. I have to admit though,” He settled his hands on his hips and looked between the two other heroes with a smirk. “I never took either of you two as the sort to dye your hair.”
“Throws off the guards.” Legend huffed, tugging his cap back over his hair and making Warriors wince. Ah yes, Legend’s Hyrule’s guards.
“Fair enough. I can find you something to help with the drying out and dye damage. Twi though...” He frowned, stroking his chin in thought. “Why do you even need hair dye? Trying something new?”
Now it was the rancher’s turn to look embarrassed, rubbing at his neck and ruffling his hair. “No, actually. I jist need- rather- want? I guess? I-”
Legend huffed, patting the rancher’s arm in a rare show of compassion. “He’s been greying early and it’s making him self-conscious. I told him we could look for a dye to hide it, since he didn’t want to go about stealing Time’s position as the resident Old Man.”
Oh. Well, that made sense. “Right! Fair enough. So, you want your natural shade, yes?” At the rancher's nod he pressed on, clapping his hands as he listed what they needed. “So, hair oil, some dye, and shampoo for Legend, preferably meant for damaged and curly hair. Anything else?”
Even though the two shook their heads, they all walked out with a bit more than what Warriors had listed, but despite the fact that Legend complained about it all, no one seemed to mind too much when he pulled the three of them together after the others had gone to bed and helped show them had to use the various toiletries without making too very much of a mess. It cost a pretty penny to get them all sorted, but Legend was clean, Twilight was a brunette again (the silver streaks were rather fetching though, and he’d made sure to make sure Twilight knew that before they dyed it all away) and Wind and Sky had what they needed to prevent their hair drying out again.
And even if it made a sizable dent in his wallet, he’d refused to be paid back. It was worth it anyway, since now he and Legend both had straight hair again (and the vet had actually washed!).
He could see now why Wild and Hyrule liked playing with their respective mentors’ hair though, it was almost addictive.
Time took one look at the three youngest and groaned, and Warriors almost echoed the action.
“What were you three even doing?” His now-eldest huffed, pinching the bridge of his nose with a heavy sigh as he tried not to look at the three teens, all of which were covered in mud and grass stains, and only looking slightly remorseful, despite their horrid clothing and scraped faces.
Had it been anyone but Wild and Wind, Wars would have sat back and watched as karma paid her long overdue visit to the mischievous mask-loving hero, but since it was his kids that caught up in paying back the silver in his own hair, Wars had to stand with Time and try his very hardest not to chuckle at the sight before him.
It took no trouble at all to picture Mask sitting, unrepentant, amid the other youngsters, a challenging look on his face as he dared the captain to even try and ground him for running off again.
“We were exploring.” Hyrule grinned sheepishly, rubbing at the mud that had dried on the side of his neck. “We um-”
“We fell in a swamp.” Wild snorted, wrinkling his nose and shaking some gunk from his hands with a pout. “Even I think we stink.”
Time’s lips twitched, brows struggling to remain in a scowl as he answered, voice wavering with a hint of laughter that made Wars smile to himself. “Is that so, Cub?”
“We smell like boko guts.”
“Or boko crap!” Wind cackled, the only one not soaked in swamp goo but instead spattered with ordinary mud that came from likely tripping and falling in the dirt from laughing too hard.
“Bathe.” Time chuffed, shaking his head fondly. “All three of you. Rivers there and I’m sure Wars has soap aplenty to help.” Hang on, what? Time’s eye met his own, blinking- winking? with a bright and shit eating grin. “Have fun with you sons, dad.”
Oh Ladies, Karma messed up again, didn’t she?
“Mask, I swear-” He growled, glaring at his- was Time his eldest now? His middle child still? The youngest since he’d been the last to join the family?
“Don’t, you’ll set a bad example.” The overgrown forest gremlin chuckled, walking away with a condescending pat of the shoulder.
Some things really never changed, huh?
“Right then.” the captain turned to glare stillness back into the three youngsters, two of which were already trying to sneak away, and the third- of thank Hylia for Wind, the kid was standing at perfect attention with a smirk on his face that screamed ‘I’m the eldest and I’m about to watch my little brothers get scolded and I’m going to enjoy every second of it’, snotty little salt-bathed brat. “Jump in or I punt you.”
Hyrule and Wild exchanged a look, a sure sign of danger, and both sprinted in opposite directions.
He huffed a laugh. Amateurs. Mask and Wind had run him ragged during the war, but once you’ve fought to pre-teens on the daily, there's nothing a pair of teenagers can pull on you that will truly surprise you or throw you off. It was the work of moments to have Wild slung under one arm (wolf pups, honestly, Mask was the same way) and Hyrule by the back of his collar (Wind’s customary position).
“H-how?” Both boys stammered.
“Experience, mud moblins.”
“Do I weight anything to you?” Wild stammered, staring up at him with wide blue eyes.
The grin on his face was easier than usual in situations like these, but then again both teens had given up fighting against him sooner than the last two had ever done. “Hardly. You’ve always been a lightweight.” And with those words he promptly administered a light kick to Hyrule’s lower back, knocking the kid floundering into the stream, and following up with a well-practiced toss that send Wild rocketing in after.
Wind, already stripped down to his shorts and standing waist deep in the water, raised his hands with a shit eating grin. “Six out of Ten, Wild.” The little sea monster called to a spluttering Wild as the kid surfaced, only his face peeking above the surface as he treaded water with a pout. “You need to work on your form, but otherwise- ack!”
A wave splashed up from Hyrule’s direction and Wild sent an appreciative grin the other boy’s way while Wind’s grin melted into a playful one, eyes glinting dangerously.
“Oh, that’s it! You’re just asking for trouble now! Never start a water battle with a pirate, you two, you won’t like how it ends!”
Another, mischief filled, glance was exchanged and both feral heroes descended on the young sailor. It was like watching cucco’s descend on a bokoblin, and Warriors watched with laughter bubbling in his chest as he stripped off his gunk-stained tunic, courtesy of the mud-covered boys he’d wisely decided to pick up, and moved on to his chainmail. The sound of the three youngest heroes' shrieking and shouting sweet music to his ears as Time and the other older heroes made camp just off of the riverbank, teasing each other and generally messing around.
“Wars, why are you- are you joining us?” Wild cocked his dripping head with a curious look as he watched him.
The undershirt slipped off easily as he waded into the stream’s center. “Of course, you two got me muddy too after all, and it’s not like I trust y’all to actually clean up by-” At the slowly spreading grins on the faces of the three, the captain realizes his mistake. “I don’t trust you all to clean up properly, so I’m-”
“Warriors said ‘y’all’!” Wind chortled, eyes glinting madly as a grin stretched over his face. “Oh boy! Just wait ‘till I-”
“Slip of the tongue.” He clipped back, hands settling on his hips as he stared down the three teens. “You tell Twilight about this and I will personally wash your mouth out with soap.”
“You’re the one who said it!” Hyrule pointed out.
“And whoever tells the rancher is committing a verbal atrocity that will only lead to far more in the future.” He huffed. “No one tells, you hear me?”
Wild looked between the others, brows furrowed and lips pursed as he took in Wind’s triumphant grin and Warriors’ scowl. “What’s wrong with saying ‘y’all’?”
The captain staggered back dramatically, hand on his chest and a horrified expression on his face as he stared at his son. “No! Never say that word! That word is an abomination!”
“What word?” Hyrule cocked his head, eyes glinting knowingly, but the captain failed to recognize it in time.
“’Y’all’!” He spat with contempt. “We do not say ‘y’all’ in this house! ‘Y’all’ is a cursed word and the next person who says it is-” - ‘Is on Mask watching duty’ was his go to consequence, but that wouldn’t exactly work right now; Time was a bit old to actually need a supervisor- “is on clothes washing duty with Legend.” He settled on at last, choosing the chore that everyone except, surprisingly, the veteran minded.
“Say the man who just said it four times in a row.” Wind teased, darting out of his grasp with a wide grin.
“Wind! I was trying to see how many times I could make him say it!” Hyrule huffed, pouting at his brother adorably.
“I still don’t get it.” Wild grumbled. “It’s a word? There’s nothing wrong with it as far as I know, ‘y’a-” The captain’s hand was clamped around the kid’s mouth before he could finish his sentence.
“Let's just not.” Warriors huffed; he was beginning to mourn Twilight’s mentor position at the moment. Fortunately, Wild was willing enough to still in is hands and not push the topic, unlike the other two who just egged each other on with ever widening grins. “Right.” He rolled his eyes. “First one with a clean face gets the strawberry scented soap; go.”
Silence fell as nothing save splashing rang over the stream as faces ducked beneath the water, all three boys falling for his favorite trick of all time. Heck, even the old man would probably still cave to the offer of strawberry soap, even now that he was an adult, and Wars couldn’t blame him at all; strawberry scented bubbles were the best bubbles and Twilight and his goat-milk soap could go sniff a skunk if they wanted to contest that.
It took hardly any time at all for all three to emerge, fresh faces and glowing, three sets of eyes al sparkling up at him as a warm chuckle blossomed in his throat. Naturally, he gave the promised soap to all three, citing the ‘I can’t tell who finished first so you all win’ excuse that Grandfather had taught him ages ago.
Wind dutifully set about scrubbing himself clean, and in the meantime, he guided the less experienced duo. “Take so much,” He dolloped a generous potion into Hyrule’s cupped hands. “And rub your hands together, yes, just like that, work it up to a nice lather and just scrub it all over. Take care you get the smelliest bits first so you don’t run out of soap before you get there, yeah?” Both forest children nodded, dutifully following his instructions as he moved to help scrub the traveler’s sopping curls.
It was an easy pattern to fall into, scrubbing the two heads with especial care to remove any sticks and twigs he found along the way. Hyrule was the easier of the two, but Wild held still better while he worked, almost melting under his fingers as he messaged suds into his son’s long locks, a light smile playing over both their faces as he worked, content to sit in the cooling water of the stream as the sun began to set, hands buried in his kid’s long hair as he worked out mud and filth and who knows what else.
Rinsing the sweet-scented bubbles started out innocently enough, but Wars was given a front row seat to watching an accidental splash descend into a full-on war on the water as he scrubbed his own hair clean, and well, if he joined in once he was finished, well, someone had to show Wind that he wasn’t the only hero with some experience on the water.
Wars sighed as he watched Time stirring quietly on his bedroll.
Honestly, his middle kid (he’d finally settled on letting Wind retain his position on oldest, since there was no way Time could be the eldest brother with his gremlin behavior) was something of an idiot. Oh, he loved all three of his boys dearly, but Time was an ass and everyone who knew him well knew it (except maybe Twilight, but that guy was an ass too).
Time hadn’t been sleeping recently, and it was easy to see in the dark bags around his eyes and the almost drifting expression on his face at nights. It was for lack of trying either, the kid- man? - the hero would settle down on his bedroll every night same as the others, but even with sharp eyes shut tight and blanket pulled to his ears, the ‘Old Man’ couldn’t lie still for more than thirty minutes, constantly shifting and fidgeting on his bedroll even as the other heroes steadily dropped off to sleep.
It was just the two of them now, the captain on watch and their leader trying to pretend he was asleep with a scowl on his face.
He was scratching again.
“Alright, that’s enough of that.” war clapped his hands against his knees and pushed himself p, staling over to stand over the largest of the bedrolls and staring down at the lump within. “What’s up, Sprout? You normally snore like a hinox all night long, what’s eating you?”
A single blue eye stared up at him wearily. “If I knew, I would have killed it by now.”
Oof, bad night then. “Do you have any idea what it could be?” He was already settling down next to the group leader’s head, hands reaching to grasp Time’s own and bring them down from where he was, likely unconsciously, clawing at the sides of his face.
“No.” Came the frustrated huff.
“Missing Miss Malon?” He suggested, running his fingers through short blonde hair thoughtfully, mind miles away in a two-story house at castle town as he fell into the all too familiar trap of playing with one of his boys’ hair.
“I thought so at first, and while I do, it doesn’t usually stop me from sleeping.” Time grumbled, staring up at the night sky with pursed lips. “It’s not nightmares or visions either, if anything my dreams have been normal for once.”
“Anxiety perhaps? Are you worrying about the others? Twilight, maybe? Wild?” At the questioning glance he received he shrugged. “Kept me up enough nights, even if you two were there. A bad thing happens once and you're not likely to forget it.”
“Hmm.” Time hummed, leaning unconsciously into his hands and settling on his bed-roll, shoulders falling lax as his single good eyes fluttered softly. “Maybe.”
Whatever it was, it wasn’t bad enough that War’s fingers didn’t put it to rest, and time was asleep in mere minutes, soft snores rumbling over the camp as the captain continued his ministrations, eyes and ears sharp and alert for any disturbance near in within the camp, but body relaxed as he kept the steady rhythm of his fingers through short and silky hair.
When his watch was over though, and it was time to wake the veteran to take his, Wars found himself stuck. Time's fingers were curled tightly in his blue scarf, the man’s head resting easy against his thigh, and any motion small of subtle, would likely send majestic blue fluttering open again with an exhausted air.
Ah well, time to be creative.
Legend grumbled, as usual, at being woken by having his feet touched, and the captain echoed his discomfort as he wrings is sore and likely sprained hand. Time was still asleep though, so there was that at least. Now just to figure out how best to position himself so he could sleep.
Soldier’s experience won over logic, and Wars was asleep in seconds, leaving the camp under Legend’s watch and Time snoozing blissfully at his side.
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darkatsumu · 4 years
Note
Listen... being a bar girl at onigiri miya after hours and developing the fattest crush on your boss. He’s good to his staff, knows how to make you laugh when you come in feeling a lil low, and he looks delicious in a dress shirt with his sleeves rolled up pouring drinks behind the bar. He even threw out a sleazy client for being rude to you (he’s more careful about the guest list after that). But he’s firm on not dating employees (for now) and the pay’s too good to quit so ur stuck pining 😩
ah shit, you activated something in me. 
title: Onigirl Miya After Hour: The Owner
It was the sound of a yelp and the shattering of glass that caused all conversations to cease. You stood still, embarrassed and humiliated after being thrusted forward with the contact of the athlete’s hand against your ass. The tray previously in your hand flipped to the ground, the glasses of cocktails and beer shattered against the floor. Some of your coworker’s had begun to help clean up the mess, but the stillness of the room even as the table of men laughed, had everyone holding their breath. 
You knew something like this was bound to happen, hired as a bar girl at Onigiri Miya. Originally you had thought it was for a waitress position at the restaurant, but the owner offered you a higher pay if you agreed to work during his after hours services. Simply put, you served men and women as they ogled at the uniform you were given. 
Most days the uniform was the casual tight cropped t-shirt with the Onigirl Miya logo on the chest and under the logo the words after hours was printed. Apparently it was the idea of the owner’s brother, ugly enough, the owner took the advice of his friend to letter the words in a godly neon purple; one that matched the blaring neon sign behind the bar. The shirt paired with the short pleated black skirt, just short enough that if one were to bend their head just right, they might catch a glimpse of your shorts underneath. 
But the owner, Miya Osamu, to put a face to the name, he had many rules. Not for his staff, but for his customers. A very strict; you can look but don’t touch. You had never seen what would happen if someone broke the rule; but tonight, tonight was your lucky night to see the show. 
When the group of men laughed after one slapped your ass, your fist clenched and you were so ready to get fired for beating a professional athlete; but as you turned to snap at the male. Chairs squeaked against the floor, footsteps approached and it was the way Osamu, followed by his brother and friends, gripped the athlete by the neck and promptly told him to “get the fuck out.” followed by a very threatening, “or I’ll make sure you’re sitting out for the season.” 
It was then, that you began to see him in a different light because for whatever reason you thought before; you’d never expect that he would actually care. Especially when later that night, he pulls you into his office, wrapping a long sleeved Onigiri Miya restaurant shirt over your waist. 
“You can take the rest of the night off and a few days off too if you want. You’ll be compensated fully for the days off.” He sits back at his desk, pulling out the schedule for the next week to see if you were interested and the way he casually pulls up his rolled sleeves of his dress shirt suddenly has you clenching your thighs. 
“It’s fine. I’ll be okay to work, plus, I like the tips.” You laugh, “There’s something beautiful about the way the more Atsumu gets drunk, the more he tips higher.” 
Osamu chuckles, “He tipped one of the girls a thousand the other night. I bet if you play him just right, he’d drop ten thousand for you.” Oh, how his laughter suddenly put a flame to your heart. 
“I’ll head back out first.” 
“Wait.” Osamu causes you to pause in front of the closed door, “When you leave for the night make sure to let me know, I’ll walk you out to your car. Just in case.” 
Oh, now you were swooning. Heart racing, cheeks starting to flush, and as you leave to head back to the bar, you’re reminded of a rule Osamu had given himself; one that he told you one night as you closed with him. The two of you sitting behind the bar, hidden from the world, you asked if he ever thought one of the bar girls were hot and while during the time you viewed him as a chill boss, his words echo in your head. 
“Nah, I have a strict no dating employees policy. I’d probably fire the girl if they tried making moves on me.”
And later that night, even as he catches you mid-slip, arm quickly wrapped around your waist, pulling you close to his chest for a brief moment. A second time that night that glass would shatter, it would be the first time, that you pondered the thought of quitting to sleep with your boss. But as Atsumu continues to throw bills at your coworker, you’re hit with the thought that maybe you’ll just have to suck it up, be a grown adult, and fantasize about your boss in your bedroom then promptly counting the cash given by his brother. 
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oneoftheextras · 4 years
Text
Colour Changer
Hawks x Bartender!Reader
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masterlist  | tip jar
prompt: Could I request a fem reader who is a bartender who has a color changing quirk, she gains Hawks’ attention. He annoys her enough to change his wing colour for the evening.
warnings: alcohol & smut
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Same shift, different night.
Being a bartender wasn’t easy - well the job was easy, but the clientele on the other hand, that was another story.
The bar was called ‘Justice’ the name made you cringe, as did the amount of Pro Heroes that would often visit after a successful day of fighting crime. It only took them a few drinks to start bragging to you about their day in an attempt to swoon you - unfortunately, this was the territory that came with the job.
The way you’d gotten the job was rather unconventional but your colour changing quirk kept things entertaining, and you quickly became the favoured bartender amongst the staff.
Of course this made a lot of your quirkless colleagues very jealous and spiteful towards you, but the tips you would take home every time made it more than worth it.
And it was always fun to see Pro Heroes drunk off their ass and fighting to earn your affections.
There was always one in particular, he would never physically fight, but his cocky tone and arrogant attitude were his weapons against the other strongly built men. He was definitely muscular but he seemed to never need to resort to that, mainly because he would never get as drunk as the others.
Almost every night he would waltz in like he owned the place, sit himself down on the bar stool closest to you and shower you with compliments and cheesy pick up lines.
He’d even settled on calling you ‘Dove’, you were sure it was some reference to his own wings, they were bright red and hung gracefully from his broad shoulders.
Tonight was like any busy night, all the regulars had taken to their perch on the first bar stool they could find to watch your ‘performance’, it wasn’t much but they seemed to love it.
You threw the cocktail shaker high into the air and focused on the liquid’s colour, as soon as it landed back into your hands you watched it transform from the dull clear colour, that it had originally been, to a vibrant red.
Pouring a little bit of it out into a cocktail glass before smacking the lid back on again a rolling the shaker from your shoulder down to your hand, again as soon as you griped the cold metal the liquid turned from a red to an orange.
The small crowd of men around you ‘Ooohed’ and “Ahhhed” like the normally did, until you had gone through the colours of the rainbow and made a rather colourful looking drink. 
“Who wants it?” you held the full glass up in the air proudly, a sea of hands flew into the air as they all started to fight over it, “Now now gentlemen, settle down, let’s do this civilly” you smirked, you had come to love how they fought over you.
“I’ll give you 500 Yen!” someone shouted from the crowd, “No, I’ll give you a thousand Yen” another voice called out, this went on for a while as the price slowly crept its way up.
“Ten thousand Yen” a voice you recognised thundered over the rest, the sea of men parted as the Fire hero Endeavour made his way through the crowd, he was one of your regulars. He didn’t speak much but you enjoyed his company, he would often break up fights that got a bit too out of hand.
“I think we have a winner” you smiled, pocketing the cash he held out to you and popping a small orange umbrella and a cherry into the glass for him before handing it over. 
“Endeavour” you greeted him, “Y/L/N” he nodded back to you, taking a sip of the drink that was the polar opposite of his personality. If he was here then that meant... “Hey Dove” Hawks’ voice stood out to you, cockily he appeared from behind Endeavour and slipped himself on the stool next to him.
Your heart skipped a little at seeing him, but you refused to let that show, “Chicken wing” you greeted him back, you also had a nickname for him, regardless of whether or not he liked it.
“You got something for me?” he raised one of his eyebrows suggestively, you saw Endeavour roll his eyes - he was already halfway through his own drink. “Depends what you want?” you leaned an arm on the bar and propped your chin up on your hand so you were level with him.
“Just my usual, but make it double” he took off his glove and brushed a hand through his hair, “Anything for you” you winked at him and got on with making his drink.
You weren’t flirty with all of your customers, some you would play along with their flirtatious jokes but never add your own, and they were the people that tipped the highest.
With Hawks however, it was a different story. There was something about his golden eyes and cocky smile that made your insides flutter like a butterfly taking flight for the first time. 
You couldn’t help yourself, you not only liked him flirting with you, but you actively encouraged him.
You’d even started to use your tips to buy nicer outfits that complimented your figure, just in the hopes that he would like what you wore. Of course the rest of the customers did too, which resulted in even more tips, but it wasn’t their attention you craved.
“Your ass looks good today” he commented, these types of remarks weren’t unheard of from him, it had started off slow with him calling you ‘beautiful’ that type of thing. It started getting more lewd when you’d bravely instigated it, by asking him if he liked your new top and if it made your chest look good.
If anyone else made such comments you would have kicked them out, but from him it made you blush and even turned you on a bit to know that he enjoyed what he was looking at.
“Hawks...” Endeavour scolded him, it wasn’t very often that his partner would accompany him here, so you supposed it took him by surprise to hear him talk that way.
“It’s okay Todoroki, let the boy dream” you glanced over your shoulder at him as you reached for the spirit bottle on the high shelf and seductively side smiled at Hawks.
Seeing him bite his bottom lip and shake his head, you turned your attention back to the bottle - it surprised you for a second to see a small red feather holding it mid air for you.
Cautiously, you gripped the bottle around the neck and thanked the feather shyly. Before it returned to it’s owner; it slid down your forearm and bicep, across your chest and in between your breasts, down your stomach, around your waist, glided across your ass and then vanished from sight.
Even though the feather was no bigger than your index finger, it was strong enough for you to feel the pressure of it through your clothes. You hated how it made you feel and the thoughts that would cross your mind.
Trying to calm your heart rate, you poured his drink the way you normally would but doubling it up as he had asked. The whiskey was a boring dark colour, so when you placed the glass down in front of him you taped it gently and changed the colour to a vibrant green.
Hawks handed you more than enough money for the drink and then drank the liquid down like it was a shot, you had to say you were impressed at his ability to hold his alcohol.
“I’ll have another Dove, do you want another... uh” Hawks turned to his partner to gesture at the rainbow cocktail he was still holding, there was a little bit left in the glass but he was already shaking his head.
You bowed your head playfully and filled his glass up again, not bothering to properly measure it out, “Any particular colour this time?” you asked him, he thought for a moment and then shrugged his shoulders “Your favourite colour” he smiled at you, putting his head on his palm like you had earlier.
Tapping the glass you changed the colour again, grinning at the shade that made your heart happy. “When are you going to admit this thing between us and let me take you out on a date?” he boldly asked, he often made jokes about taking you out for a night on the town or spoiling you, but that’s all you ever took them as - playful jokes.
“Can I?” you ignored his question and gestured towards his wings, they seemed to perk up on their own at your attention to them. “Uhh” for the first time since you’d known him he seemed uncertain, “Sure” he finally said, bringing his wing forward to touch your outstretched hand.
In honesty, you’d always wondered what his wings felt like, they always looked so fluffy and soft even after a long day of work.
When they touched your finger tips, you pushed against them like you were running your fingers through long grass and in return they shivered under touch in a ripple like affect up to where they connected with his spine.
As soon as that happened he pulled them away, “Don’t do that” he barked quickly, his sudden authoritative tone made you jump for a second, but when he couldn’t meet your eye you gathered that they must be sensitive.
“Sorry, I wont” you apologised and waited for him to bring them back into reach again, this time you didn’t stroke them like you really wanted, but instead with a quick tap you changed them to a bright white colour.
Giggling and stepping back away from the bar so you were out of his reach, and so you could admire your work. Your quirk wasn’t too powerful and changing the colour of something as big as his wings was hard, so some of the feathers were a light pink colour which just added to the hilarity.
“Who’s the Dove now?” you teased him as he inspected what you’d done, at first he looked shocked but when he saw how entertained you were he laughed it off.
Some time went by and most of the patrons went home, Endeavour was long gone, bars weren’t really his scene. You couldn’t help but giggle every time Hawks’ new bright white wings illuminated the dark room, it made him stand out more than normal and you could tell he was hating every minute of it.
“Okay, that’s enough, change them back” he said with humour in his voice when you came over to refill his glass, but you were feeling particularly playful today, “Or what?” you stuck your tongue out at him and poured the whiskey into this glass again.
“Come on, change them back” he insisted, this time his voice sounded more commanding than before, you met his eye and saw that he was very serious, you couldn’t help but smirk, “Make me” you said slowly.
He was definitely taken back by your courage to challenge him so head on, but if there was anything you knew about this man, it was that he would never back down from a challenge.
“Oh, I will, don’t you worry” he teased, taking a sip of his fresh drink. Grabbing a rag, you started to wipe down the bar, it was coming up to 11pm, “So when do you get off?” he asked suggestively after he’d swallowed a gulp of his drink, “Of work that is” he clarified - this must have been his sixth or seventh but he seemed completely sober.
“In ten minutes” you said, glancing at the digital clock on the electronic register, he knew when your shift ended because he was here every night you were, there was no way that he didn’t know your shift pattern by now.
“If you can wait that long?” you added as you put some glasses back into their place on the shelf behind you, when he smirked and continued to sip his drink without taking his eyes off of you.
The ten minutes went by extremely slowly but the closer it got to the end of your shift the harder your heart started to pound, the two of you had been flirting for months but you’d never seen each other without a bar being a barrier between you.
You’d never been alone together and that made you nervous, what if he didn’t like you outside of work? Sure, he’d asked you on a date multiple times in the past but you always brushed it off as a joke.
“I’m clocking out” you called to your boss as you typed in your code on the register so you could sign yourself out and finish your shift. The entire time you felt Hawks’ eyes on you, you watched him out the corner of your eye as he tipped his head backwards and finished off the rest of his drink.
You couldn’t help but feel nervous as you saw him rise from his chair and walk to the end of the bar to wait for you, without checking to see if he was following you, you continued towards the exit and left the bar.
The cold air hit you like an old friend, it was refreshing after being behind a stuffy bar for 11 hours. You knew he was following behind you closely, you kinda liked the idea of him being desperate for you attention so why not play hard to get?
“Where are we going then?” you asked him without turning around to face him, “I know a place” he replied, he was now walking alongside you - not only was he notoriously fast at flying, he was also a pretty good speed walker.
“Lead the way” you gestured ahead of you both as though you were metaphorically passing the reigns of the night to him. “I normally do” he winked and turned 180 so he was walking backwards and could face you.
“So what made you want to be a bartender?” he asked you as though he was genuinely interested in your answer “Only job I could get in this city” you shrugged, you weren’t lying, having such a boring quirk shut a lot of doors. 
If you didn’t have something breathtakingly amazing or versatile then your job options were limited.
“Did you want to be a bartender?” he boldly asked, considering this was the first conversation you were having with him privately it was very brave - but weirdly you felt comfortable around him.
“Of course not” you laughed a bit too harshly, you were pretty sure that no one grew up wanting to be a bartender. “What did you want to do? You know, when you were little?” he continued, this was one way to get to know someone you guessed.
Shaking your head to the ground, you had to chuckle, “I wanted to be a Pro Hero believe it or not” you hated that you were telling him this, it felt so awkward. Every kid wanted to be a Pro Hero, but to say it to someone who was actually a registered Pro Hero was a bit different.
“Why didn’t you?” he put his hands behind his head and looked up at the stars as he walked backwards, “Colour changing isn’t really a quirk that can make you a hero” you said flatly, stuffing your hands into your jacket, “I figured out pretty quickly that the Pro Hero life wasn’t one that would accept me” you were getting serious now.
It was strange how it was him that you were telling this to, you barely knew him.
“Speaking of, you wanna give me my wings back?” he turned his attention to your face, you’d be lying if you said you’d forgotten he wanted them back to red, but you wanted to see how long you could get away with it.
“I told you, make me” you reiterated your words from earlier, giving him a sly smile and a side eye. “You wanna do it this way?” the corner of his mouth crept into a cheeky smile, a grin full of mischief that you wanted to see more of.
Instead of answering him, you turned your head the other way like you were ignoring him and continued walking.
“Okay, you asked for it” you heard him say, then all most immediately you felt his arms wrap around your waist and your feet depart from the ground. At the realisation you screamed and clung onto the closest stable thing which turned out to be his shoulders.
“Oh my God, okay, okay, this is fine” you talked to yourself, trying to calm down but the ground getting further and further away from you was daunting. The few cars that were on the streets at this time faded into small dots as you went higher and higher into the sky.
Deciding it was probably best not to look down, you reverted your gaze back to Hawks’ face, he was still donning that cheeky grin and a cocky expression. “Hey, I asked nicely” he looked down at your frightened face with amusement as his colossal white wings flapped furiously against the night air.
“Put me down Hawks” you tried to sound intimidating, but your legs had gone to jelly as did your voice. “Say please” he teased, taking one had away from supporting you and using it to brush a wild strand of hair out of your face.
Sighing, you had to give in, you felt like you were going to slip through his fingers any second “Please, please, please put me down” you begged him, you hated that you’d crumbled to quickly when you weren’t even afraid of heights.
You felt his chest rumble as he hovered over the roof of a rather tall building, he slowly lowered you down until your feet touched the weathered surface, you were trembling, half out of fear and half out of pure adrenaline. You’d just wished he’d given you some sort of warning.
“Wasn’t that fun?” he put his hands on his hips proudly as he glanced down at the city below, you must have been at least 500 foot into the air, “Yeah, if you call the risk of falling to your death fun” you joked sourly.
“Do you really think I would let you fall?” he cooed, bringing his attention back to your face, he curled his wings so they were either side of you - it gave you a sense of comfort. It blocked the wind from touching you, so you felt as though you were safe.
“We had a deal, didn’t we? Change them” he shook his head towards his right wing as a gesture for you to use your quirk on them. Looking up at him through your eyelashes, you brought your hand up to his delicate feathers, as soon as you touched them they started to twitch and you could feel his body tense up next to you.
Not quite done with him, you used your quirk like he asked but instead you changed them to an inky black colour, you watched him groan as he noted your playfulness. You decided to push your luck, pushing your fingers gently into the velvet of his feathers, not enough to hurt him but enough to put pressure on them.
You were rewarded with a breathy groan from Hawks, you looked up at his face, surprised to see his eyes closed and his brow furrowed. Taking in his features, you carried on, gently brushing your fingertips under some of the bigger feathers and caressing the root underneath. Every part of his wing you touched quivered shortly after, you could tell by his open mouth that he was enjoying this very much.
It wasn’t just his face you noticed, but also the hard on that was pressing against your leg. “So that’s why you don’t let people touch your wings” you smirked at him, the sound of your voice making his eyes snap out of whatever thoughts he was having.
A soft growl erupted in his throat and his wings grew bigger as they enclosed around you. You were surrounded by the huge mass of his wings and there was no way out, not that you wanted to be anywhere else. Months of teasing each other from across the bar had finally led to this, and you could cut the sexual tension with a knife.
“Change them back” he commanded you, his voice taking on a dominant tone, “Like this?” you teased, pushing your fingers deeper into his feathers, this must have taken him by surprise because he let a moan slip through his plush lips. It caused a momentary distraction from the fact that you had changed his wing colour to bright pink.
“One last chance Y/N” he warned you once he’d noticed, “Or what?” you raised an eyebrow cockily, “I’ll make you” he pulled you closer to him so your chest was touching his, his free hand roamed around your lower back.
Feeling extra brave you matched his arrogance “And how are you going to do that, Hawks?” you wet your bottom lip with your tongue and smiled at him, tongue still in between your teeth. “Keigo” he said, “What?” you asked him confused, “My name is Keigo, call me that, not Hawks” he started to fold his wings over themselves, making the gap between the two of you smaller and smaller.
“And how are you going to do that, Keigo?” you corrected yourself, making sure you said his name nice and slow so it rolled off your tongue. If felt good saying it, and by the look on his face it sounded good hearing it.
His face was getting dangerously close to yours, he was gradually leaning in, if it wasn’t for him being so much taller than you then you would be able to reach his lips yourself, but the power was all his.
“Say it again” he breathed, taking the hand that wasn’t on your back and placing it under your chin, “Keigo” you said as best you could with your jaw in this position, you felt the grip on your chin widen to your jaw and the warmth of his lips on yours.
The first kiss was gentle and slightly dry, as soon as he parted his lips from yours you darted your tongue out to wet it again, all this tension was making your mouth dry.
In the second it took you to stick your tongue out of your mouth you’d accidentally misjudged how far away his mouth was from yours and you licked his lip as well.
Almost immediately, he smooshed his lips onto yours, the kiss was deeper and with open mouths, the hand on your lower back was pulling you in closer and closer until you felt like he was going to snap you in half.
You let your hands wander, untucking his shirt and grazing your hands over the skin of his V line. Following your lead, he wiggled his fingers until they found their way under your own top and his palms were pressed against the bare skin of your back.
This was already heated but you wanted more, for hours a day he would sit across that bar taunting you with his words and caressing you with stray feathers, you had been waiting for exactly this for months.
Without thinking, you reached for the buckle of his belt, trying to undo it as best as you could while focusing on fighting his tongue for dominance. After a few second he broke the kiss and glanced down to your fumbling hands, they were still shaking from the adrenaline of the flight.
“Eager huh?” he smirked confidently at you, you hated how cocky he was and you hated how attractive it made him, “I want you, Keigo, I’ve wanted you for a long time” you admitted to him as his hands guided yours in taking his belt off and unbuckling his pants.
Now it was your turn, but instead of unbuttoning your jeans with both hands, he continued his journey along your back and up your spine while popping the button of your jeans open with his other hand, “I know” he said smugly.
Instead of pulling your jeans down, like you thought he was going to do, he slid his hand into your underwear and used the tip of his middle finger to rub slow and small circles around your clit.
“I’ve wanted you too” he breathed, your hips were bucking forward every other circle that he painted, your breathing became heavy as you panted into his mouth that laid open against your lips.
Seemingly not happy with the lack of noise you were making, he ran his middle finger along your soaked folds and then slowly pushed it inside of you, making you moan - slack jawed.
“I’ve wanted you for a very long time” he reiterated his previous statement, fucking you with his finger a little bit faster with every stroke, “I’ve watched so many people try and earn your attention and failed” he explained to you, adding another finger into you, making you moan even louder than before.
While he was talking into your ear, you were too busy enjoying the knot tightening inside your stomach to notice that the hand on the small of your back had been replaced with his wing and was now pushing his pants over his thighs so they would fall to his ankles.
“Do you want me to fuck you?” he asked bluntly, your stomach flipped at the wording he chose, you loved hearing the cuss words leave his mouth. You were so full of bliss you could only nod as an answer to his question.
“Say it” he said, using his thumb to rub your clit and stimulate you even more, you were so close to your orgasm that you could feel your walls clenching around his long fingers, “Fuck me, Keigo” you moaned into his mouth, placing your hands on either side of his face so you could pull him and deepen the kiss.
You were so close, you could feel it, just one second longer and you would orgasm around his fingers - but then the pulled them out of you, chuckling darkly against your mouth that had stopped kissing him.
“Change my wings back” he commanded you, but you refused to give in. Instead you entwined your fingers into his wings and tugged them lightly, changing the colour to green. He groaned loudly and threw his head backwards, he loved how feisty you were.
“Fine” he growled at you, pulling your jeans down until they were around your ankles as well, he grabbed one of your thighs and brought it upwards so he could unhook the bottom of your jeans and free one of your legs.
With little to no effort, he grabbed both of your thighs and lifted you up so you could wrap your legs around his waist, using his wings to support your back. Immediately you felt the head of his cock poking at your entrance, until it pushed your folds aside and he sunk into you.
With a groan, he rested his head on your forehead. Once you seemed like you were comfortable he started to lift you up slowly and then, just as slowly, lower you onto him. He thrust his hips upwards to force himself deeper inside of you.
Every movement had you moaning, you bit your bottom lip in an attempt to quieten yourself but it was hardly working.
“You don’t need to be quiet, no one will hear you up here” Keigo grunted as he started to pick up his pace, it was easy to forget that you were on the roof of an extremely tall building when his wings were wrapped around you so tenderly.
The knot in your stomach was building up again, you weren’t really surprised considering you were so close before. Your whines became higher in pitch and more frequent as his thrusts hit your g-spot every time, making your insides tingle and twist in the best way.
Gasping, you were so close, you were trying really hard to muffle your cries so he wouldn’t know but the clenching of your walls around him gave you away. Your arms were around his neck and your hands grasped the roots of his messy blonde hair.
Then he stopped again, just holding his dick inside of you, unmoving.
He was denying you your orgasm and it was driving you crazy, “Please” you begged him, desperate for your release, “Not until you change my wings back” he smirked down at you, rubbing his nose gently against your cheek.
Groaning in frustration, you untangled your fingers from his hair and reached for his wing, you had given up, he won. As soon as you touched his feathers they shivered again and out of instinct he bucked his hips upwards making you close your eyes and scream in pleasure.
“Sorry, they’re sensitive” he breathed, you really didn’t realise how much touching his feathers affected him. When you opened your eyes again, you watched him stretch his bright red wings out behind him and shake them like a wet dog shakes his fur after a bath.
“That’s better” he smiled down at you, “Now, where were we?” he continued, and almost instantly he started to pound you at a ferocious pace, his wings were no longer around you so you could see the city sky line as you bounced on him.
You were no longer scared, the pleasure of him inside you and the adrenaline of being so high up were mixing together like a perfect potion, it pulled tighter and tighter on the knot in your stomach.
Feeling all of you muscles tense around him and your hands pulling his hair so hard that his Adam's apple was on display for you.
Your orgasm kicked off exactly where it had stopped and you scrunched your eyes together as you came around him loudly. You could feel his chest vibrate as he chuckled at your expression, he wasn’t mocking you, it was more a laugh of pride and arrogance - he was happy he’d made you cum.
His own thrusts started to become rapid and erratic, indicating that he was close as well. Still coming down from your high, you focused on helping him reach his own orgasm, you bounced on him to the off beat rhythm that he had set as best as you could.
You heard a growl in his throat start to grow until a loud moan erupted from him and with a few hard thrusts you felt him spill himself inside you. If you were closer to a second orgasm you were sure it would have tipped you over the edge again.
His hot breath made little clouds in the cold night air around you, his forehead had tiny beads of sweat that had formed and his visor was slightly steamed up. He lifted you up so he could slip out of you and you could find your footing on the ground, pulling your undies and pants back on again was slightly awkward, you didn’t know what to say.
“I don’t normally, you know-” you started but he put his hand up to stop you, “It’s fine, that was as much of me as it was you, and trust me I wanted to” he grinned at you as he buckled his pants back up again.
Once you were fully dressed, you started to run your fingers through your hair in an attempt to brush it, “Anyway, I’d hardly call that a date” he brushed his pants down as the dirt from the roof flew off of them in large clouds.
“Shall we be off?” he extended his hand out for you to take, hesitantly you took it and he wrapped his arms around you, cuddling you for a moment, “You promise you’re not going to drop me?” you looked up at him, being serious for a second.
“I’d never drop you” he kissed your forehead gently and then pushed off of the roof, letting his wings flap proudly and lift you off the ground. You had no idea where he was taking you, but you didn’t care.
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Tag List: @mylife-demonstrates-murphys-law @hereticpriest @enagmaticether @anxiousgoddest
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adowbaldwin · 4 years
Text
Pain in the (perfect) ass
@butternuggets-blog  i hope it lives up to the imagination :) 
Battle of Bibracte
The Roman battle line easily threw back the defence of the Helvetii. It had been engaged at the seventh hour that the barricade of opponents were bested, and the Roman Legionnaires advanced downhill, swords in hands and shields at the ready. Their heavy footsteps smashed against the ground, and even amongst the mud, guts and blood their footing still thudded in the ears of the enemy. Unsuspectingly, the Helvetii reinforced their stance aided by Boii and Tulingi, arriving with more men then the Roman army had whores.
Sweat pored from every orifice Legate Lucius had, but he wouldn’t give up now. Not on mans Earth would he surrender. He had a bet to win with Alcides; that he could have this battle won by day daybreak. His men looked to him, trusting his judgement and he looked to them trusting his life in their hands. He dismounted his horse, joining them in the good fight on foot and charged like his life depended on it.
The air was thick with iron, metal clanking against metal and the faint shudder of skin rippling under blades. He had waited, calculated the best moment to order the onslaught of attack. Lay in wait was Philippe with his men, arming themselves with Pila. The spectacularly pointed, metal weapons made Lucius swoon. There truly was nothing better then a metal pointy thing, other than a woman’s warm  cunny. “READY” He boomed, left arm lifting up “FIRE” he screeched stretching his arm outright to commence the attack.
Spears swished though the air, cutting into every particle they came into contact with. Men’s blood splattered from their throats as each one sunk into their targets. Each body unsuspecting, not prepared for the attack dropped right infront of their eyes. Caesar had surrounded himself with quick thinking, strategically minded and tactical generals who guided him as much as he did them.
The preoccupied Lucius, who mid wrestle with a Gaul suddenly squeaked, eyes popping from their sockets and dropped to the floor. He fell, tumbling into a ditch taking the Gaul with him. The rolled in the mud, and in the melee Lucius finally succeeded in sinking his blade into the abomination. Once he had completed the deed the skin burning, eye watering pain in his ass got worse. He clenched his plump cheeks together, squeezed his eyes shut and slowly patted his rear hoping and wishing what he already knew to be true, wouldn’t be. He had been shot in the ass with a spear.
His buried his face in his bicep, already reconciling the fact he was quiet literally on his ass, behind enemy lines completely done for. He laid silently for hours, sometimes passing out in pain, other moments laughing to himself at the ridiculous situation he had gotten himself into. Only weeks ago he joked about sodomy, and now inches from his own whole lay a pointed metal weapon. Life truly is a bitch, isn’t it? What he could not fathom, is why he had not died yet. The pain was almost unbearable, but death had not welcomed him yet.
Night quickly came and went when his own army had began to scout for survivors and that’s when he heard it. That unforgiving, bastard laughter coming from his friend and commander “Salve Lucius, my dear boy you seem to have forgotten how to use a spear” Alcides had almost cried laughing at the state before him. He had scented his body before he seeing, dread almost coming over him at the thought of him dead. What he had found, would be ingrained in his ancient mind forever; his truest friend in a ditch far from the battle, covered in mud with a great ruddy spear poking from his ass. Life has a funny way to fuck you, doesn’t it?
Lucius peered up at him, blank expression “Te futueo et caballum tuum” he hissed
Alcides pouted, mockingly “Men, come and put your commander on a stretcher. Be careful, he’s a real pain in the ass” he chuckled, kicking his horse into a light trot to follow them
Lucius grumbled, hissed and screeched profanity as he was lifted him onto to one of the God awful medical beds, carried by idiots. They were all laughing, Alcides was almost falling from his horse snorting and Lucius just kept his chin on his hand frowning as he was paraded through the camp with a massive spear poking out of his ass.
The camps surgeon had been a days ride away, and the medic decided it best course of action that the spear stay firmly planted in his ass until he arrived to avoid further tissue damage. It was held upright with a series of intricate ropes, and he just laid flat on his stomach until told otherwise. He waited, hours upon hours for the laughing men to leave before turning his angry little face to Alcides “Oh, it’s not like there is a immortal in the camp that could use his blood to heal the wound” he hissed. He knew of his commanders affliction and hoped he would spare him further embarrassment
A humoured, lighter voice broke through “Oh, you have it wrong Lucius, there are but two immortals in this camp” Hugh came into view, sauntering over to the wounded soldier and lowered his face to him “I hadn’t noticed it before, but you do have the most delicate ass” he chuckled as Lucius face turned the colour of their clothing.
“Oh do not tease the boy Hughie, he will only get you back when he is on his feet” Alcides had not stopped laughing, and at this point was wheezing. He had found the situation so wonderfully funny he had even turned away his favourite little mistress in order to laugh at his expense all night.
Hugh patted his head mockingly cooing him like a baby, and in an attempt to redeem himself Lucius bit his hand. As we all know, vampire blood has anaesthetic properties and he was quickly snoring the embarrassment away. To add insult to injury whilst in his sleepy daze, Caesar blackmailed the camp’s artist to paint his general in all his speared glory, had the painting named ‘Spit Roasted’ and Alcides kept the painting hidden away within their families treasures. In the many years to follow, he would threaten to expose Lucius ass cheeks to the family and it kept him in line, quiet well.
 “Te futueo et caballum tuum” – Screw you and the horse you rode in on
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19mrs-barnes17 · 4 years
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Decide
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Summary: You neighbor’s clock is evil and the walls are very thin.
Part: 1/1
Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader
Warnings: injury, hospital, ...that’s it?
Word count: 3.412
A/N: Gonna open up my requests for dialogue prompts with a pairing. Enjoy!
~
The noise was obnoxious, so early in the morning it echoed through the paper thin walls. With a groan you rolled out of bed and slipped into exercise gear. This was becoming a real inconvenience for your lazy natured ass and you did not appreciate it. Stuffing your card into the secret slit in your waistband you waltzed out the door, locking up your apartment as you slipped in your bluetooth headphones. When you reached the staircase you pressed play on spotify before sliding your phone into your single pocket on your thigh and speeding down the steps. 
Working out was not an activity you particularly enjoyed doing, but the reward of adrenaline and energy was enough that you began to mind the early wake ups less each day. They had become part of your routine and besides, you were far too nice to tell your neighbor that his alarm echoed into your room and woke you bright and early every day. You were stuck in the habit anyhow, if you didn’t hear the alarm you’d be worried. 
On the bright side your endurance was improving with each early morning jog, and yet your courage was at a standstill. Your neighbor was gorgeous, and an absolute sweetheart who had helped you move into your apartment two months ago. Yet neither of you had made a move. Not once.
Today you planned on changing that, tired of waiting for him to do something and done with worrying if he didn’t feel the same. You were in the mood to move against the grain, be the first to make a move. A to hell with it type headspace.
As you jogged down the sidewalk you decided to change your usual route, opting to run laps around the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool in front of the Washington Monument instead. The area was empty when you arrived, not a soul in sight as you began your first lap. Soon enough, however, you found that a man began to pass you repeatedly and often within the same lap. You knew it was your neighbor Steve, and boy was he driving you crazy muttering those three damn words every time he sped by.
“On your right.” Though you had your music playing, his voice still broke through, the vocals and instruments not loud enough to drown him out. You really wanted to retort or show him off, but you knew that you had to conserve your energy if you were to keep going. Your pride refused to let you stop before he did. While you kept a constant speed and never sped up out of spite, it took all of your energy to do so. 
“On your right.” You really were gonna let him have it for these taunts, they were killing you. He was relentless and you were becoming exhausted the more you heard him utter that phrase. This was ridiculous, just because you didn’t have the endurance of a super soldier didn’t make you weak. And yet, you’re stupid pride and stubbornness wouldn’t let you quit. 
“On your right.” You couldn’t help but let a laugh slip as he passed by, you could see a hint of a smile dance across his lips as he rounded the corner. When he reached the steps he slowed to a stop, you thanked the gods, reaching the same point a minute or two later and collapsing onto a step. 
“Has. Anyone. Ever. Told you. That you. Inspire serious. Competition?” Your words came out in chunks as you struggled to reign in enough oxygen, heart pounding in your chest like a beast. Steve shook his head with a smile, rubbing his neck as a chuckle slipped from his lips. “Well you do, kudos though, you have a terrifyingly good endurance.”
“Um, thank you?” You laughed softly, taking deep breaths as you leaned back on the steps with your head tilted toward the rising sun. “So, how are you liking the city?”
“Never lived in one before, only in smaller towns that no one knew unless they grew up nearby. It’s a faster change of pace, really keeps me on my toes.” He watched you speak with such intent, listening carefully. “And the people aren’t too bad.”
“That’s good to hear.” You pushed off the step and stretched out your sore muscles, definitely going to be feeling that later. Pulling out your headphones and stuffing them into your only pocket, you plucked out your phone and paused the playlist. 
“You have a place you usually go after a run?” He cocked his head to the side with a perplexed expression that was vaguely puppy-like. “To eat? Or get coffee or something?”
“Oh, uh no. I usually just head back to my apartment or work.” 
“Well if you’re not busy I’m headed to Jo’s down the way. She has the best pastries and I’m told the coffee is to die for.” He nods softly and you motion for him to follow you, eyes watching over your shoulder as he moves to your side. 
“Not a coffee fan?” You shook your head, gesturing that you were ‘kind of’ one but not really.
“I like the sugary frozen drinks, but straight up coffee doesn’t give me any energy and so I pretty much find it useless. I’m more of a tea fan anyway.” 
The smell of the coffee beans hit you and you couldn’t help but smile as you inhaled the delicious scent. It always betrayed you, made you seem like a fan or an addict but you simply enjoyed the scent not the taste. One peppermint tea and a cinnamon muffin later, you sat with Steve talking about your lives. Though you had read his in history classes and in museums, you preferred hearing the story from the source. The lives you led were different, on many accounts, and yet somehow the two of you shared a state of mind. You were different people with different thought processes, but you had similar values and hearts.
“Sorry, I’ll just be a minute.” Steve waved off your concern as you stood to exit the cafe with your phone to your ear. The conversation lasted longer than you would have liked, but telling your mother you had to go meant absolutely nothing. It may be a stereotype that mid-westerners take forever to say goodbye, yet it was so utterly true. Especially when it came to family and friends. Thankfully Steve was very considerate and waited with patience as you struggled to end the phone call that had accomplished its goal 10 minutes ago. 
He found it rather amusing to watch you visibly become a completely different person than he knew. Though arguably he had lived next door to you for two months and hardly spoke to you, and yet he knew you to be quite shy and not too talkative. But with someone you knew, words just seemed to flow consistently and naturally from your lips. The way your body language shifted intrigued him, made him want to become someone you felt that comfortable around. It was a version of you he had only seen in glimpses when running with you this morning. The way you loosened up when he teased you, the lightness of your laughter nearly making him swoon. 
Inside the building you went your separate ways, not crossing paths until the next morning when you bumped into him in the hall. You began to wonder if he had waited for you, as you had taken longer to get yourself ready that morning and stopped to snack on an apple. But you bit your tongue and followed his lead. 
“What do you do?” He stood at the bottom of the steps in front of you, watching you curiously as you sat upon the step with your chin in your hands.
“Like as a career?” A nod and you shrugged, a small smile tugging at your lips as he shook his head at you. “I’m a forensic pathologist, specializing in identifying causes of death essentially.”
This new routine became your new normal, every day you would run with Steve and talk about your lives. Each morning brought new topics of discussion until eventually they became the most absurd of thoughts. Some runs ended with silly banter while others were followed by analyzing bad dreams, each talk bringing you closer together. He was becoming someone you would go to when you were stressed or when you needed a second opinion. He was becoming your closest friend in the new city. And yet you still longed for more.
“How come you never go on any dates?” He nearly choked on his water, coughing words of confusion with a bemused expression. 
“I could ask you the same.” You shrugged with a fading smile, eyes trailing toward the window as you shifted on his stool. 
“Just not the object of any guy’s affection I guess.” 
“Maybe they’re too scared or nervous.” You smiled softly and returned your gaze to his gentle blue eyes that held a look you couldn’t read. “I don’t doubt that there are dozens of men interested in you.”
“Then these bastards should start speaking up, I’m pretty damn oblivious when it comes to signals apparently.” Steve mumbled something under his breath and you barely caught it. “What was that Rogers?”
“Nothing.” He was saved by the ringing of his phone, you could almost see the relief in his posture as he moved to his room to take the call.
You sipped your glass of lemonade slowly, eyeing the way storm clouds seemed to be gathering in the distance. Might be a rainy run tomorrow, but Steve always had a remedy for such situations. He provided you with one of his rain jackets, and even wore one himself after you insisted upon it. Even if he was genetically modified you were pretty sure he was not immune to the common cold. 
He emerged with a solemn expression and you immediately pushed off the stool, brow knit together in worry. Steve waved off your concern, explaining that he had been called in for a mission and would be gone for at least a week. You were bummed but understood that duty called and who were you to deny Captain America. 
“I wonder if I’ll just wake up that early out of habit for a few days.” 
“What do you mean?” You had forgotten that he still didn’t know that he was the reason you had begun to run in the mornings in the first place. 
“I only took up running because your alarm clock wakes me every day at an ungodly hour.” You cringed as you forced the words out, his expression growing more and more baffled. “Paper thin walls Steve.”
“So all this time…” You nodded, laughing softly at the way he seemed to kick himself for waking you daily. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I’m too polite.” He was reeling from this confession and a laugh of disbelief slipped from his lips and he gazed at you bewildered. “Plus, you waking me everyday gave me an excuse to finally get into exercising in the morning. Ever since I moved in, your alarm clock has been my greatest nemesis.”
His laughter was light and infectious, his guilt seeming to fade as his eyes squeezed shut and his smile spread from cheek to cheek. 
“Don’t know what I’m going to do without it for a whole week.” His eyes softened, mind seeming to be scheming behind them. 
“I could call you.” His gaze shifted to the floor as he rubbed the back of his neck. “If you want, keep you on track.”
“I’d like that, but your ass better factor in time difference.” His eyes flickered to yours and returned your smile. 
“Yes ma’am.”
The next morning he knocked on your door and sent you off on your first run without him in ages, while he hopped into a sleek black car and faded into the horizon. It was lonelier than you remembered, but his texts buzzing on your watch cheered you on. Without fail the man called the same time every morning, even if he was supposed to be in a briefing he delayed it for a minute or two. He did his best to send you silly gifs, which you had introduced him to, in hopes of making you smile. 
The mission had been extended. And without missing a beat Steve kept his promise, not missing a call and always sending you a goodnight text even if he still had a debriefing and would be up for another hour or two.
If you had learned anything about Steve, it was that he somehow found the strangest gifs you had ever seen in your life. They never quite matched what he meant and yet you began to become fluent in his gif language. You on the other hand were easily understood, your gif selection unparalleled apart from perhaps your brother. But Steve? Bless his heart, the man did his best and was slowly improving with time.
But in all seriousness, you had learned that he had the biggest heart of anyone you had ever known. He selflessly gave you a wake up call daily, made sure to check in so you didn’t worry about his safety, and always sent you to sleep with a text wishing you sweet dreams. Steve was sweet and he had an odd but sometimes hidden sense of humor. 
If he didn’t have your heart before... he did now. Totally and completely.
When the next morning she awoke to the ringing of her phone she expected his voice to be on the other end. However, when her mother’s voice emanated from the other end of the line she was perplexed. 
“Mom? What is it? It’s very early in the morning.” Her voice was shaky on the other end and you immediately sat up in bed. 
“It’s your brother, he’s in the hospital. There was a car accident, a drunk driver, he’s okay but he’s in surgery now.” 
You were anxiously tapping your foot on the rug of the waiting room, brain still not quite awake enough to fully process the situation. Your brother had come out of surgery but was not awake yet, so you sat with his fiance and your mother not speaking a word. The buzzing of your watch caught your attention, a text from Steve bringing you back to reality. You sent a quick response saying where you were with the room number included as the doctor approached. 
Steve was frantic on his way to find you in the hospital, his mind racing through thought after thought. He hadn’t felt this afraid in a long time. He hated the feeling. When he saw you standing in the hall grabbing a snack from a vending machine he released a sigh of relief.
“We really need to work on elaboration of details in your texts.” You knit your brow, arching an eyebrow as he read out your words. “In hospital, room 315. Don’t worry.”
“You can’t blame my tired brain, it doesn’t make sense earlier than 7am. Or even after if we’re being honest.” He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Sorry I made you worry. I’m here for my brother, he just got out of surgery. Drunk driver hit him.”
His arms were around you in a heartbeat and you were momentarily taken aback before hugging him back. You would never have the courage to admit how good it felt to be held by him, the warmth and comfort he provided. When he pulled back you felt the absence of his warmth and almost shivered.
“How is he?”
“He’s okay, bed-rest for at least a month or so to recover. Lucky bastard made it out alright.” You smiled at your little brother through the open doorway. “Thanks for coming, you don’t have to stay if you don’t want to. I might be here a while.”
“Of course I do.” You cocked your head to the side, not quite following his thought process. “You support the people you love, especially when something happens to one of their family members.”
You met his gaze, a weight being placed over your heart. You couldn’t decipher whether he meant that as a close friend or more, the line was too blurry to comprehend. Your mind was in a state of debate, running through the past month and half meticulously. Had he given signs that you had missed? You were never sure about what could be read as more than a friendship, always too afraid to be wrong. 
He must have sensed the conflict in you, reading it in your eyes or your expression. Steve took a deep breath and uttered three words you never thought you’d hear. Especially not from a man you had previously expected to remain your neighbor. They made your chest flutter, your cheeks flushing under his gaze. You were speechless, completely and utterly unable to form a coherent thought.
“Are you sure?” Minutes of silence and your doubt still won over your voice, his brow furrowing at the question.
“I’m sure.”
“How do you know?” You couldn’t help it, your mind simply couldn’t comprehend the idea that he had fallen in love with you in about two months. He was quiet for what felt like a long period of time before he finally spoke and rendered you once more speechless.
“Because you’re the first person I want to see in the morning. You’re the only thing on my mind all day when I’m supposed to be focusing on missions and briefings. And you’re the only person I can sit with in a silent room and be content.” He smiles and laughs, almost to himself before continuing. “I love the way you get so worked up about tv shows and their accuracy. I love the way you tilt your head to the side and furrow your brow when you see something that confuses the hell out of you. I can’t get over how you always seem to know every song that comes on the radio, or the lyrics to all the theme songs of the shows you watch. And I love that you find that a critical element of tv, and how you shame Netflix for having a skip button for the intro.”
“If it’s not good enough to watch every time then the show needs a new theme.” You say matter of factly and Steve chuckles as he shakes his head, raising his hands in surrender. “You know it's true.”
“I mean it Y/N. I love all the things that make you who you are. Even the flaws that make you a human being. Especially those.” Your lips part slightly in awe. “Because I love who you are and I love you.”
“I think I’ve loved you ever since you first mocked me on a run.” 
“I did not mock you.”
“You were cocky about your speed and you totally mocked my average speed.” 
“You are so dramatic.”
“Which apparently you love.”
“Got me there.”
“You’ve greenlit my weirdness as a trait of attraction. No turning back.”
“I have a feeling I’ve only seen the tip of the iceberg.”
“Oh you have no idea.”
You smirked, eyes twinkling mischievously at him and eliciting a laugh in response. He leaned in and kissed you fervently, your arms wrapping around his neck as he held you close. Steve’s forehead rested against yours, eyes gazing into yours intently.
“You’re going to experience a complete change in your sense of humor, trust me. I have a very twisted and odd sense of humor.” You place a hand on his chest and raise your brows. “You’re also going to end up swearing more often. These are simply traits that people always seem to acquire after spending a lot of time around me.”
“Can’t wait.”
“This also means I am likely going to become much more patriotic and heroic. And I may mess around with your shield, but don’t worry about that.”
“Mhmm. Sure.”
“This is just a taste of what you’re getting into.”
“Anything with you is something I can handle, because it means you are by my side along the way.”
“Jesus Christ I’ve unlocked Captain America’s flirt function, is it a switch or a dial?”
“Neither.”
“I’m going to become mush at this rate.”
“Do you want me to stop?”
“Never.”
~
Tags: @qtmeryr​ @broken-hearted-barnes​ @asphalt-cocktail​ @gstran18​ @cantnkrusshedevil​
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impala-dreamer · 5 years
Text
The Game
SPN FanFic
~Look, when you're stuck on set for upwards of 18 hours a day, sometimes you gotta come up with things to amuse yourself. Enter: The Game. Three handsome men, one beautiful and willing woman, endless possibilities.~
J2M x Reader (Jared x Reader, Jensen x Reader, Misha x Reader, no m/m entanglement)
2,370 Words
Warnings: NSFW! Bukkake! Circle-Jerk. Masturbation. All the cum. Um... it's just fun fluffy porn.
A/N: This gem is for my Bukkake Square for @spnkinkbingo 2019. Hope you enjoy!
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It was a little game they played sometimes, when the crew was delayed or the weather was bad; when something held up production and gave them a large gap of downtime. It was a particularly fun game, as really there were no losers, and those were always the best sorts of games.
There wasn't really a name for it, but Jared like to call it Jackson Pollack, because that's what you looked like when they were done with you. Just a ruined canvas splattered with their paint.
On this particular Friday afternoon, a freak hail storm had closed down the set for a few hours, and Jensen had beckoned you to his trailer for a round of play. Excited by the idea, you were practically dripping by the time you reached his door, and Misha met you with a smile, taking your hand to help you up the stairs.
“Hey, Y/N,” he greeted with a smile; pink lips spread wide, cheek shadowed in Castiel's scruff. Unfortunately, he had already been to wardrobe and no longer wore the costume, but his tight black t-shirt was a fine, sexy replacement for the suit.
“Great scene this morning,” you said, hitting the top step. “Very growly.”
Misha laughed and came up behind you, wrapping himself around your back. He nuzzled into the crook of your neck and growled as he nipped at your tingling flesh.
“Yeah, just like that,” you murmured mid swoon, blood already simmering.
His lips rose and pulled at your ear, sending a shiver through you that would have knocked you down had his wide hands not been locked around your front. He stroked your breast with this big thumb and your nipple popped to greet it.
“Hey now... save some for me.” Jensen appeared from the bedroom, bottle of beer dangling from his fingertips, a slick smile gracing his lips.
Misha’s grip slackened and you slipped away, swinging your hips as you walked to Jensen. “You know there’s always enough for everyone.” The blush was full in your voice as well as your cheeks and Jensen pulled you close as soon as you were within arm’s reach, wrapping one big hand around the nape of your neck to drag you forward. You looked up and gasped gently as his kiss closed your eyes. His lips were soft and wet with beer, his tongue hungry as it pressed between your lips.
He hummed and let you go, watching with dark forest colored eyes as you swayed on your feet, a little dizzy from his kiss. “Got a special treat for you today,” he teased.
You came back to Earth with a happy sigh and batted your lashes at him. “Oh, really?”
“Mhm.”
You laughed and licked your lips, catching a final hint of his beer. “I’m excited.”
Jensen coyly reached out and pinched your nipple, still hard and visible from Misha’s attention. He cocked an eyebrow and smirked. “I can see that.”
“Where’s Jared?” you asked, trying to get a move on the game before you came simply from anticipation. The ache between your legs was growing stronger with each sly smile and pass of fingers against your sensitive skin.
Jensen nodded towards the bedroom behind you. “Setting up your surprise.”
The bedroom was at the very back of the trailer and wasn’t big, but it was twice the size of yours. The double bed was made and clear of anything but a few pillows. You frowned at it, expecting to see your usual bondage kit, but turned your eyes to see Jared bent over, fiddling with something on the floor. There was about four feet of empty space between the bed and the closet, and Jared took up most of it, his sexy ass displayed in your direction beneath Sam’s dark blue jeans.
“Well, that is a nice surprise,” you laughed, tilting your head to take in the view.
Jared twisted around as he stood and gave you a grin. “That’s for later,” he joked, and then stepped aside to reveal your true present with a wave of his big hand. “That’s your surprise.”
Standing erect on the laminate floor was a large, bright purple, suction cup dildo, complete with a firm set of balls that seemed to sparkle in the light.
“Oh…”
Jared pushed up behind you and slipped his thumbs beneath the waist of your jeans, slowly drawing them around as he bent to your ear. “You’re gonna ride it.”
“I am,” you agreed in a weak voice, breath catching as he popped the button on your pants.
“You’re gonna put on a nice show for us…”
“Uh huh…” Your head rolled back against his chest as his long fingers snuck inside your panties.
“And then we’ll see who wins you tonight.”
Two fingers spread your lips as he pressed up against your clit, and your shoulders shook against him. “Please.” Your voice was a deep whimper that drew the other men into the room.
“Already begging,” Misha noted with excitement. “This is gonna be fun…”
Jensen shut the door.
Jared drew the blinds.
Misha caught your shirt as you flung it across the small room.
“Hey, slow down,” he told you with a laugh. “Take your time.”
Jared perched on the end of the bed, long legs spread, hand on his thigh. “I said we wanted a show.” His voice was dark and sexy, and your pussy clenched at the hard tone.
“OK…”
Jensen leaned back against the door, his arms crossed, lip pulled tight between his teeth. His eyes were glued to your body as you slowly slid the denim from your hips, inching it down.
“Like this?” you asked coyly, flashing him a sexy pout.
He licked his lips automatically and your clit throbbed. “Just like that.”
You turned when you jeans were around your knees and bent over at the waist, giving each man the perfect view of your tiny panties. You could feel the thin cotton sneak upwards between your ass cheeks and you knew that Misha, in particular, would appreciate it. He liked to play with you like that, yanking the fabric up into your pussy, rubbing it through your slick. He was a bit more...kinky than the others, and you didn't mind one bit.
“So sexy, Y/N/N,” the angelic actor sighed.
His voice made you shiver and you shot him a wink as you stood, reaching around your back to unhook your bra. When the clasp was open, you drew an arm across your chest, covering your tits as you pulled the fabric away. Chewing your lip, you spun around to face your audience and dangled the bra between two fingers.
“Who wants it?” you asked, grinning as three sets of gorgeous eyes tried to pry behind your forearm.
Jensen clicked his teeth and you tossed the bra his way, nearly knocking him in the face with it. The silk fell at his feet and he dipped his head to look at it. “Nice. Keep going.” His eyes flipped up to yours, thick lashes framing the green, and you all but lost your train of thought as his gaze bore into you. “Now.”
Heart racing, you slowly dropped your arm and hooked both thumbs around the elastic of your panties, pausing to make sure you had their attention.
Jared’s eyes were wide and dark, staring at your newly exposed breasts. “Go on,” he said softly, bottom lip wet and bright pink as he bit down into it.
Misha whistled in admiration as you pulled your panties down, taking your time to slide them off of your legs and step out. You made sure to stay bent over a bit longer than necessary, knowing how much he liked to watch your tits swing.
“Better?” you sang, standing straight up and popping your hip. The rush was intense, every man staring at your nakedness, lust and dominance visible in their eyes. They wanted you and it made your pussy clench almost painfully.
“Much.” Jared’s voice cracked, deep and raspy. “Now why don’t you try out your new toy?”
Your stomach flipped at the idea and you slowly backed up until the huge purple cock was between your legs.
“Like this?” you asked, sinking to your knees.
Jensen pushed away from the door frame. “Might wanna get it wet first…”
Nodding in understanding, you dropped down onto all fours and slowly licked the tip of the dildo. Misha hummed, Jared shifted, and Jensen stepped closer, squinting as he watched you take the shiny silicone between your lips.
“That’s beautiful,” he grinned, turning towards Jared. “You see that? Beautiful.”
“She is,” Jared replied, big hand sliding up and down his thigh firmly. “Very nice.”
You set your hands on the floor beside the dick and went to work, bobbing up and down, doing push ups as you slicked the toy up nicely. After a final gag, you sat up, a nice line of drool strung between your lips and the tip, and looked over at Jensen innocently.
“Is that good?” you chirped, batting your eyes at him.
Jensen smacked his lips and glared. “Why don’t you go for a ride and find out?”
The dildo was warm from your mouth and slick enough to impale yourself with little trouble. It was thick but the stretch was delightful, making you moan as you lowered your cunt around it.
“Well?” Misha asked from the back.
You popped an eye open and smiled. “So good.”
“Glad you like it,” Jared said. “Now, ride it.”
You started moving, slowly rolling your hips over and over, enjoying the tightness, the full feeling of the new toy. Once you were sure it wasn’t going to move from its spot on the floor, you picked up speed, riding until your thighs began to burn.
Jensen was the first to step up, dragging the zipper on his jeans down with two thick fingers. Your eyes flew instantly to his hand as he pulled his dick free and began to jerk slowly.
“Oh, fuck,” you moaned, mouth watering as Jensen’s beautiful cock loomed so close.
“Not today, Princess,” he said, shaking his head. “You just keep doing what you’re doing.”
Misha was next, dropping his pants when he reached your side. He stood opposite Jensen and bit his tongue as he whacked off, firm stomach tensing beneath his tight tee as he watched you fuck yourself.
Jared held out the longest, simply staring quietly as your cunt swallowed the purple dick again and again. He rubbed himself through his jeans, palm open, fingers splayed, teasing until it hurt too much to keep going.
“We ready?” he asked the guys as he joined the circle, standing right in front of you and pulling out his massive cock.
Misha grunted and Jensen nodded, too intent on winning the game to answer him properly.
Jared fisted his cock and looked down over you. “Are you ready?” he asked sweetly.
Biting your lip, you looked up with pathetic eyes, your own pleasure dull against the thought of them dumping their loads on you. “Yes, Jared. Please.”
“Faster,” he ordered and you bounced with all your remaining strength, fucking yourself for their amusement.
You weren’t sure who came first, you or Misha, but there was a moment of shuddering breath and rolling eyes when your orgasm nearly knocked you off your knees and his hot spunk hit your chest. It flowed down in a sticky wave, droplets leaving the stream to dance around your nipple.
“Fuck!” He backed away, victorious and spent.
Jared’s fist was a blur, whipping up and down so quickly that you could barely see it. Your pace had slowed, but you kept riding, your pussy throbbing around the giant purple dildo.
“Right...there!” Jared grunted as he came, shooting his cum straight and true, hitting your chest and sliding down between your breasts, painting your stomach as well. He staggered backwards with a huff, chest heaving and brow sweating as he retreated.
Your legs were shaking but you kept on, one last player to go.
“Come on, Jen,” you whispered, eyes flickering up to his. He stroked his cock hard, beating away, teeth clenched, shoulders tight. “Please, Jensen…” You opened your mouth and laid out your tongue for him, begging for his cum.
“God...fuck!” He missed your tongue, but it didn’t matter. Jensen spilled onto your tits, hot and wet, making your entire body shiver.
You were covered in them, painted like the perfect canvas Jared always said you were.
He helped you up, strong hands coming to your rescue as your legs refused to work.
“Alright there?” he smiled and smoothed the hair back from your eyes.
You laughed, a little giddy and lightheaded. “Oh, yeah. Mhm. Alright is a little weak in the word things.”  
Misha chuckled as he fiddled with his giant belt buckle. “Awe, we broke her.”
“You sir,” you said, wagging a finger at him, “you’re the broken.”
“I might be broken,” he said, with a wink, “but I won.”
Jensen cleared his throat. “What? No, you didn’t.”
Misha gawked at him. “Yeah, I did. I came first. I win.”
“It’s not who comes first, ya moron,” Jensen retorted, shaking his head at Misha. “It’s who lasts longest. How many times do we have to go over this?”
“Ya know,” Misha nearly pushed you aside as he rushed to Jensen, his finger wagging just as yours had a moment ago. “When it’s you cumming first, you always win. When it’s me, forget it. You can’t just change the rules when it suits you.”
Jensen gasped and clutched imaginary pearls. “Like hell I change the rules! You never even knew the rules to begin with!”
“I helped make the rules!”
“You’re insane!”
While Misha and Jensen argued, you looked up at Jared and smiled sweetly. “Wanna take me to dinner?”
He laughed and kissed your cheek. “Go hop in the shower, babydoll,” he said, giving you a gentle shove towards the bathroom. “You’re mine tonight.” He tapped your ass with his palm as you went and you jumped, spinning to blow him a kiss.
“Guess you win!”
Jared grinned and nodded. “I always win.”
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belliesandburps · 5 years
Text
(Commission) Fraternal Lovin’ - Part 1
The following is the first part of a commissioned story for @chili-kinks which features her OC’s Dale and his boyfriend (at the time) Chad.  In this part, the boys head to a frat party and after one too many beers, Dale gets roped into a rather vigorous eating contest with some of Chad’s buddies.
College life was fleeting. 
It was that brief period between adulthood and REAL adulthood, when the focus tilts away from studies and focuses on the real world. Jobs, stability, responsibility, families, all the many things these young men and women had dreaded. And as such, it was important to make the absolute most of their time on campus.  That’s exactly what Chad intended to do.  The young man truly looked exactly how his name sounded.  He was a dashing, tall youth; physically built with thick, notable muscles, short hair, and wearing a tanktop with jeans.  
Chad was on his way to a Fraternity party, one of about a dozen he went to every few weeks.  As he walked through the streets, he drew the gaze of just about every woman who saw him and swooned.  Even a number of men couldn’t help but gawk at the ridiculously attractive specimen of physical perfection.  Unfortunately, for all of them, Chad was already taken. 
“So, THIS is where ya ‘Animal House’ it up every friggin’ weekend,” Chad’s considerably smaller boyfriend muttered as he examined the Fraternity House of Operations.  This was Dale.  He was a short young man, maybe around 5’2ft, had mid-length, wavy sand-blond hair, with wide eyes, tanned skinned, and in contrast to Chad’s muscular body, Dale was a little chubby, with a round face and a noticeable little beer belly on him. But he was undeniably cute; it was hard to really put into words.  Dale wore a T-Shirt and jeans, walking alongside Chad, who had his arm wrapped around his little boyfriends thick hips.  “Does this make you John Belushi?”
“I’m pretty sure that’s you, dude,” Chad said with a smirk, reaching down and poking Dale’s thick stomach, which made the young man yelp then blush.
“Well, I WOULD look good in a Toga,” Dale conceded, before snickering and adding, “though I’d never get into a food fight’n waste all that good shit.”
“I can tell,” Chad remarked, eyeing up Dale’s stomach was the two eventually made their way into the party house.  “WHAT UP, PARTY PEOPLE? CHAD IN DA HOOOUSE!!”  Chad declared confidently. 
And next to him, Dale stepped out and declared, “Featuring Dale Reese! Hold yer applause!”
Of course, no one was applauding.  Instead, a number of ‘dude-bros’ all swarmed Chad, chatting him up. “Yoooooo, Chad!  Ain’t nobody told us the legend was droppin’ by!”
“Weeeeell, I dunno if I’d call myself a ‘legend,’ but hey, your words, right?” Dale remarked nonchalantly, brushing his fist against his thick chest.  There was a deadpanned stare from some of the other frat members and party goers, but they eventually just turned their attention back to Chad, who shook his head good-naturedly at Dale’s joke.  Dale, of course, snickered because he thought his joke was hilarious, then he went over and nabbed himself a drink.  The small, chubby man approached the keg and poured himself a cup, casually taking in the scene.  Dale dipped his head back and slugged down his first cup of beer, throat bobbing in and out as he took hearty glugs, downing his cup in no time at all before pouring himself another.  Chad continued chatting it up with his ‘bros’ for a bit before eventually heading back to Dale and pouring himself a cup of beer himself.  “So, whadduya usually do at these things anyhow?”  Dale asked, chugging his second beer down in no time at all.  He gasped heartily and wiped his lips clean with his forearm before pouring a third.
Chad downed his first cup at a more reasonable pace, and then poured himself another cup.  “Usual stuff, y’know, shoot the shit, drink, and watch the guys make complete ass’ of themselves-“
“-Hey, that’s my job!”  Dale pouted, making Chad laugh as he reached over and wrapped an arm around his smaller companion, tugging him close to his broad, muscular torso for a one-armed hug.
“And a fine job you do indeed, my man,” Chad remarked, dipping his head back and downing his second beer.  Dale took that as a complement, as he so often did.  “Here, lemme introduce you to a friend of mine from Football, I think the two of you will hit it off.”
Chad and Dale strolled along to the air hockey table where two college students were shredding it, back and forth trying to best one another.  One was physically toned young man with mid-length, red-dyed hair.  He wore a black tanktop with camouflage cargo pants and sneakers.  This was Tommy.  His opponent was a large, burly, Hispanic male with short black hair, a thin goatee, with a sleeveless white school jersey with athletic shorts and playing shoes. His name was Zeke.
Both Chad and Dale just watched with silent amusement as both college football players just relentlessly assaulted the others pads by smacking the puck with tricky corner shots.  Somehow, the other always managed to counter it right back.  Their back and forth extended for a few minutes, which bewildered Dale because he’d never seen a single game of Air Hockey last that long...partially because he sucked at the game, but that was neither here nor there.
As the two kept watching the matchup, Dale grabbed himself another beer and chugged heartily.  After polishing it off, he hiccupped loudly all of the sudden, catching him off guard and making him cover his mouth.  Dale’s hiccup punctuated Tommy’s victory as his puck finally slipped past Zeke’s and into the goal.
“BOO-YA!  Now THAT’S how ya do it, brah!!” Tommy declared, dropping his pad and pumping his fists into the air victoriously. 
Zeke just released his pad and grumbled some profanity in Spanish before turning his attention over to Chad and Dale.  Immediately, the big man grinned and held his hand out to slap it down over Chad’s before tugging him in for a brief bro hug.  “Whaddup, C?”  Zeke greeted while Tommy sauntered over and did the same shortly after Zeke.  “Didn’t think you was gonna drop by t’day.”
“Yeah, I wasn’t initially, but then I realized my man here hasn’t been to one of these’n thought I’d change that,” Chad replied, gesturing to Dale, who smiled back at the two football players.
“Yer Dale?”  Tommy asked, earning a proud nod from the small, chubby man.
“Last I checked,” Dale replied jokingly as he extended his fist out for a fist bump, which he received from both players.  “You guys got a cool place set up here.  I mean, I’ve never been much of a frat guy myself, but I won’t lie, I can see the appeal...well, everything ‘cept the hazing...”
“Pfft, no joke,” Tommy muttered in annoyance, rubbing the back of his neck with embarrassment at the memory.  Zeke, on the other hand, was all smirks at the same memory.  The four young men continued chatting it up, with both Chad and Dale drinking more and more cups of beer as their conversation progressed.  Laughs and more pleasantries were exchanged, and everything was quite pleasant enough. Dale hiccupped a few times, emphasize that he was getting a little more noticeably drunk.
But as all four continued chatting things up, thoughts were soon interrupted by a loud, rumbling sound...
*GWwWUuUuUUuUUuURrRRRBLE!!*
The source was Dale’s thick T-Shirt concealed stomach, which grumbled audibly and hungrily, drawing the eyes of Chad, Tommy and Zeke alike.  Immediately, the smallest of the four young men went red in the cheeks as he chuckled sheepishly and rubbed his belly hungrily. “Mph, they say don’t have too many beers on an empty stomach, but I say don’t do anything on an empty stomach,” Dale remarked, clearing his throat and smiling timidly back at the two football players.  “Don’t s’pose you guys have any grub around here, do ya?”
Both Tommy and Zeke shared a glance, both grinning wide, competitive grins, before glancing back at Dale.  “Say, brah, we had an eating contest comin’ up but our third guy had to bail...”
Zeke nudged and gestured to the living room of the frat house.  “You up for takin’ part?  Plenty of burgers’n hot dogs to spare, dude.”
Now, Dale had an appetite to spare, but he tended not to be really overindulgent.  However, given how he’d already had a few too many beers since kicking it at the frat, the chubby, round-faced little man just pumped his fists in the air and said, “Oh, it’s on like Donkey Kong!  And Donkey Kong hasn’t been on in like twenty years!”  Dale blinked and turned back to Chad.  “...That didn’t work at all, did it...”
All Dale could do was chuckle and shake his head.  Even when drunk, Dale’s pun game was always the same...
Nevertheless, Dale, Tommy and Zeke all sat down at the dining table where a crowd of drunken frat kids all watched eagerly.  Set before the trio were trays loaded with hot dogs and cheeseburgers to spare. Dale felt his mouth watering at the sheer sight of all that food just eagerly waiting to be consumed.  Chad stood out from the crowd, watching Dale and said, “You got this, bro! They’re complete pushovers, especially Tommy.”
“Hey, not cool, brah!”  Tommy whined while Dale and Zeke snickered with amusement.  Before long, the eating contest had kicked off, and all three immediately went to work plowing through their burgers.  The pace in which Dale and Chad’s two friends ate was rather equally rapid.  Dale took big and hearty chomps out of his burgers, making his cheeks puff out comically as he heartily chewed away.  Then, he dipped his head back and swallowed hard.  An especially large bulge protruded from Dale’s throat as the meat slid down his gullet.  He thumped his chest a few times to help work the meat down, then gasped breathlessly before going back for more.  
A few minutes passed and the three young men always managed to pack away enough food to more than satisfy most of the college students watching the contest take off.  Considering that Dale already had a considerable belly on him, the impact wasn’t immediately noticeable.  He just kept on chowing down, one burger after the other with no stops in sight. 
Zeke was such a big, burly young man, and as such, his body had more room to take in food.  Tommy, on the other hand, being the leanest of the trio, had less room to grow.  And it was starting to show as his stomach pushed out uncomfortably beneath his shirt.  Every eating contest Tommy partook in, he always came up short to Zeke. So he kept soldiering on, chowing down more and more in the hopes of outlasting his linebacker companion. 
More minutes ticked away and more burgers and hotdogs were packed in.  Under normal circumstances, Dale would’ve probably called it a day by now, having more than eaten his fill.  However, the round-faced young man had an appetite to spare and with how many beers were festering within him, he was too eager to plow through whatever he could get his hands on.  Chad continued watching the scene, casually downing his own beer and not once taking his eyes off of Dale.  The impact of the meal was starting to appear a little more noticeable. Dale was already a chubby guy but now, that soft belly of his was pressing out even more, to the point where his pants were looking considerably snugger.  Even his t-shirt now looked a little tighter, especially around his middle as he ate.  At one point, Dale sat back to wash down his latest mouthful with another cup of beer. When he dipped his head back to start slugging his alcoholic beverage down, his shirt hiked up a little, exposing a sliver of Dale’s bare belly from the bottom of his much tighter looking shirt.
Chad did his best not to bite his lower lip at the sight and instead drank more of his beer.  Instead, he just watched as Dale’s throat bobbed in and out rapidly while more beer flowed into his round, pudgy stomach.  Setting his empty plastic cup down, Dale huffed breathlessly, wiping his mouth clean with his forearm.  Then, after a momentary look of discomfort, Dale clutched his bloated belly firmly with one hand then let loose with a rather tremendous belch.
“BAAAAAOOOOUUUURRRUUUUP!!!!”
Chad was taken aback, as were a number of other partygoers watching the contest.  Some of the frat guys whooped and cheered the crass display, while some of the girls groaned with disgust and walked away.  But Chad felt just cheeks burning ever so slightly at the deep, bassy sound. When it ended, Dale smacked his lips and gave his gut a couple of hearty pats of satisfaction.  “PHEW!  Heh, what was it Shrek always said?   Better out than in?  Hehe, well, I dunno if it tastes as good comin’ up, but it sure FEELS good,” Dale remarked with a huff of relief, smacking his gut one last time for emphasis, causing it to jiggle slightly beneath his palm and making Dale hiccup. The sight of that made the flush on Chad’s cheeks intensify, causing him to take another drink to mask how flustered he was getting. 
“Yooooo, nice one, brah,” Tommy declared before grinning back at Dale.  “But check this shit out!”  The red-haired young man sat up straight with a concentrated look on his face.  Then, Tommy thumped his chest and let loose with a belch of his own that easily rivaled the one Dale let out, while not quite as loud, it was actually just slightly longer.  When it ended, Tommy grunted with relief and palmed his stomach.
Sitting back in his seat, Zeke grinned before grabbing his own noticeably distended stomach and let out a titanic belch, one that topped both Dale’s and Tommy’s both in volume and length, likely due to Zeke’s much larger frame being able to take in more air.  When it ended, Zeke huffed with relief, leaning back and giving his taut, bloated gut a hearty pat of satisfaction.  “Now that’s how it’s done, fools.”
After that little gaseous display between the three contestants, they were right back into the frenzy of stuffing their faces. More and more from their respective piles of food began to fill their ever-expanding bellies.  Dale’s already plump gut appeared even plumper as it pressed out further and further, causing the button of his pants to appear unbearably tight around his pelvis.  That tight T-Shirt of his appeared even tighter as it hiked up, exposing even more of a sliver of bare flesh.  Dale’s shirt now rested just below his rather deep belly button.  His facial expression, while obviously incredibly drunk, was showing some deep discomfort.  The young man had an appetite to spare, but even he had his limit, and Chad was pretty sure that limit had passed at least ten minutes ago.
In spite of that, Dale just kept on packing away one burger after the other. He managed to grab a few hot dogs and every once in a while, mix things up by chomping heartily on each hotdog he shoved near his crumb-smeared mouth.  It only ever took a few bites to get a dog down, and sometimes, Dale’s mouth would envelop a good half of the hotdog, inserting most of it into his mouth before biting down and swallowing hard.  Chad wasn’t sure if his chubby little boyfriend was implying anything there or if he just really loved himself some hotdogs, but it was enough to make steam rise out of the muscular young man’s slightly flush cheeks.
But of course, as the contest went on, it had steadily taken its toll on the other two contestants as well.  Tommy had eaten as much as he could possibly stomach and then some, but after a while, it just became too much to bear.  With a large belch, Tommy sat back in his seat with a sour expression on his face, waving his hand in a ‘no more’ sort of manner.  “Urf, f-fuck it, I can’t, brah, I’m out,” Tommy remarked, tenderly rubbing his achingly bloated belly before bringing a fist up to his mouth to stifle a very wet and gurgle-y sounding burp, one that indicated something more than air might have come up.  Still grasping his swollen middle, Tommy rose up from his seat and left to nurse the ache he was feeling, and hopefully, without being sick.
With the red-haired young man down for the count, that just left Dale and Zeke.  And despite both contestants being stuffed beyond reason, neither one was quick to back down from a challenge, especially when it involved food.  So, the two young men kept on packing it away, occasionally downing more cups of beer to help wash all that meat down.  Chad kept his eyes on Dale the whole while, the chubby little pun-machine looked beyond stuffed and positively piss-drunk.  After a certain point, Dale’s belly was pushing so much that it not only hiked up his shirt enough to finally expose his deep bellybutton.
Not only that, but with how firmly that heavy gut pressed against Dale’s already snug-looking pants, it genuinely appeared as though his pants button would just pop right off.  He looked utterly miserable as his chewing became more and more labored.  Each hearty gulp he took looked strained while the bulge in his throat took longer and longer to slide downwards past his chest. He appeared positively spent and hiccupped sharply from all the beer as well as the excess pressure against his esophagus from his feeding frenzy.  It wasn’t looking good for Dale.
Fortunately, it wasn’t looking much better for Zeke either.  The dark-skinned linebacker’s gut looked unbearably heavy.  It had rounded out by two solid feet, hiking his shirt and exposing the entirety of his bare belly to the audience.  In contrast to Dale’s very chubby, especially plump and soft dome, Zeke’s looked rock hard; as if he’d just swallowed a very big watermelon whole.  At one point, he brought a fist to his mouth, as if he was about to be sick, much to the anxiety of those watching.
Instead...
“HOOOOOOOORRRRRUUUUUUUUP!!!!!”
A tremendous, raunchy sounding belch erupted from Zeke’s mouth, one that came from the very depths of his belly and left him huffing and patting his belly in an exhausted manner.  The sound of Zeke’s palm hitting his gut sounded, fittingly, like someone patting a watermelon.  He ran his hand all across that expansive, rock-hard dome of his, burping again and again as he tried desperately to make as much room in his belly as he could muster. Dale could hear it gurgling intensely, as Zeke was clearly well past his limit.  Unfortunately, so too was Dale.  However, unlike Zeke, Dale had a little more experience stuffing his craw, and unlike the large, muscular young man besides him, Dale’s belly was soft and chubby enough to allow for a little more breathing room.  And Zeke was now spending a lot more time catching his breath and burping far more often than he was eating.  This was Dale’s chance to gain the upper hand against his opponent. But first, Zeke’s nonstop burping was reminding Dale that he also needed to make some room in his overstuffed belly.
Sitting back, Dale swallowed a bit of air, the sound causing a deep gurgle from his throat as his big, swollen belly seemed to push out just ever so slightly from the influx of air.  Then, when there was enough air in his overstuffed gut, Dale gave his prominent belly a hearty slap, secretly hoping it wouldn’t cause him to throw up.  Fortunately, the only thing that came rushing up Dale’s throat in response to that slap was a torrent of gas and pressure...
“BRRRAAAAAUUUUUUURRRRR-UUUUUUUURRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRP!!!!!!”
Dale’s mouth gaped wide open and his head lurched forward as he let loose with an utterly thunderous belch, one that easily dwarfed anything anyone had let out up to that point since the eating contest began.  Even Zeke looked taken aback and impressed, well, on top of looking incredibly nauseous.  It pattered out slightly a few seconds in, but then immediately picked right up, heftier and more rumble-y as the whole thing stretched out to eight seconds straight in total. 
Chad cleared his throat at the sound, biting his lower lip.  His cheeks darkened when the burp finally rumbled to an end, and Dale practically went cross-eyed as he sat back in his seat, moaning with relief as he gave his gut a hearty pat of satisfaction.  The surface of his soft, pillow-y gut rippled and sloshed heavily with that pat.  “Urrrgh, well, that...” Dale stopped speaking mid-sentence; looking strained for a moment, before thumping his chest firmly, “HUUUUAAAAARRROORRP!!!” And sure enough, another much shorter, but still hefty-sounding belch rumbled up his throat.  When it ended, Dale grunted and palmed his stomach, before sighing contently and adding, “...That definitely made more room.”
Grinning ear to ear, Chad pumped his fist in the air and said, “You got this, dude!  Show ‘em who the reigning eating machine really is!” 
Hearing that, the bloated, drunken little man groggily looked back at the crowd and grinned, giving a thumbs-up.  Then, Dale went right back to steadily packing away more and more burgers and hotdogs.  It was much slower paced than before, but Dale was still consistently managing to gulp the meat down. 
Zeke tried to pick up the pace, but no matter how much he tried to catch his breath, rub his aching belly or how frequently he burped, there just wasn’t enough room in his gut to go further.  “Mph...t-too full...” Zeke finally muttered, tenderly caressing his achingly bloated belly with both hands, before throwing his head back and letting out one last massive belch, which ended with Zeke groaning breathlessly and slouching back in his seat. 
Dale’s packing it away was slow and painful, and while he was still the last man standing.  He still needed to finish what was left on his plate.  And it was looking like he too, couldn’t eat another bite.  Dale’s gut was pressing unbearably tight against his pants, and his belly was so unbelievably big that he couldn’t even reach around it to undo his pants, at least not without making himself sick.  However, because his pants were so strained at this point, and because his prominent girth was so immensely heavy, it seemed his pants had plans of its’ own. 
The front of Dale’s pants quivered aggressively as the pants button untethered slowly but surely.  And sure enough...
*SSSNNNIP!!-POP!!*
The pants button just snapped right off of Dale’s pants, causing that bloated dome of his to surge outwards freely.  Dale’s jeans unzipped all the way down, and would’ve exposed his boxers were it not for that massive belly of his spilling out and expanding with no more constriction.  Chad’s eyes actually bugged out for a brief moment at the sight of his chubby little boyfriends positively ENORMOUS belly spilling outwards and jiggling considerably. “...Holy shit,” Chad murmured breathlessly as he downed the rest of his beer.
But Dale, meanwhile, just reeled back in his seat, moaning with utter bliss as he rested his palms gingerly atop his expansive, churning midsection. “Ohhh, *HIC!* orf, haaaah, sweet, glorious relief...”  The young little man just sat in his seat, savoring his stupendous fullness for a moment, forgetting temporarily just how full he was.
With Dale’s belly freed from his constriction, he was able to finally pick up the pace and resume demolishing the remnants of his meal.  It still took some doing but Dale managed to eventually consume every single burger and hotdog that remained on his plate.  After gulping down one final, especially thick mouthful, Dale gasped breathlessly then grabbed his belly with both hands, throwing his head back immediately after...
“BAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRR-HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRP!!!!”
Gripping his soft yet immensely round belly, Dale declared his victory by letting loose with a gargantuan belch, one that managed to dwarf even that utter monster he unleashed earlier during the contest.  Despite his fullness, Zeke whistled, clearly impressed while the sound echoed all throughout the frat house.  Chad did his best not to get red in the cheeks, instead clearing his throat and smirking back at Dale.
“Atta boy,” he muttered, sauntering over to Dale, who reeled back and sighed heartily in his seat, tongue hanging out of his mouth as he did so.
“Damn, dude, you a beast!”  Zeke declared, holding his fist out to Dale, who winked back at him and bumped fists with his competitor before someone approached Dale with a trophy of a plastic man chomping on a burger. 
“I’d ask if you have any words of victory, but I’m pretty sure that burp kinda said it all,” Chad remarked, while Dale just smacked his lips and nodded back wearily and drunkenly...
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easnuppa · 5 years
Text
Secret feelings
A special thanks to the wonderful @crossbows-and-moonshine for helping me with beta reading! You are truely wonderful and special and i apretiate you lots and lots!!!
Summary
my female o/c is one of the orignial group members in the walking dead, she have always known her place with them and since the world ended she have bonded with them and sees them as her new family, until one of the men starts to shine alittle brighter then the rest in her eyes.
Pairing: Daryl Dixon x ofc
Warnings: description of violence, language, mention of rape.
Chapter 1: Prologue
There it was again, that weird smirk and that knowing look that seemed to be contagious throughout the group that had become her family after the world went to shit. Everytime she entered the common room inside the prison, or she stepped outside to work the fences, people would have that shit eating grin and that knowing look plastered on their faces, it was starting to get on her nerves. What was it that they knew that she didnˋt? The only person that was acting somewhat normal, normal for him at least was Daryl.
Her heart started beating faster just thinking about the man. She gave herself a mental slap in the face, she had to stop this nonsense, the man was her best friend, had been ever since that night at the CDC. There had not been enough rooms for everyone, so she had the choice to either bunk up with Glenn or Daryl, the choice had been easy, Glenn had given her the creeps before he met Maggie and fell for her, Daryl seemed as antisocial as her self, so she had just trudged into the room behind him and placed her scarce belongings on the floor.
At first Daryl had seemed annoyed, but she had simply shrugged and stated all the other rooms where taken by the rest of the group. He had accepted her statement quietly, until later that night, after they had all had filled their bellies with food and drinks. She could not remember the last time she had gotten that wasted. Daryl had seemed pretty far gone too, he had actually cracked a few jokes with the rest of the group and when they had all turned in, he had turned into quite a chatterbox. They had stayed up most of the night talking, and from that night on they had become real close. He had accepted her wanting to learn about tracking and hunting, he had let her tag along when he had searched the woods for Sophia, he had also accepted that she had placed her tent right next to his, after that devastating day when they learned that Sophia had turned and had been locked away in Hershelˋs barn. She had quietly sat with him every night, given him her comfort and support and he had not even once tried to push her away.
They were friends, best friends infact, so why had her stupid heart decided that it was gonna fuck up what meant the most to her in this shitty world now? It had hit her like a brick wall when Daryl had not come back from the mission to save Glenn and Maggie from the crazy Governor. Rick had explained to her that Daryl had met up with his long lost brother Merle in Woodbury. No one had wanted Merle back in the group, and Daryl had been forced into a corner, he had to choose between his blood and his new family, he had chosen his brother. She could not blame him, she understood, but it hurt none the less. It actually hurt so much that she had cried herself to sleep every night, clutching Darylˋs pillow, embracing the smell of him that still lingered faintly in the fabric. Then it had hit her like a sledgehammer, she not only thought of him as her bestfriend, she had actually grown feelings for him on a deeper level, and then he was gone. After realizing this she had decided that she needed to be around him, not that she would ever tell him how she felt about him, she knew that would only ruin everything, that he would never in a million years return her feelings. He was simply not the type of guy that swooned over a simple girl like her. She could accept the fact, she just needed him around. So she had packed up her things, and decided that since he had left, she would too, she would use the skills he had taught her and find them.
But destiny had something else in store for her. When she had entered the prison gates and was making her way into the forest line, a truck had burst through the gates surrounding the prison and walkers had spilled out into the yard. A few more trucks had pulled up as well and shit hit the fan again. The Governor had retaliated and was peppering her friends and family with bullets. She had shrugged off her backpack and joined her new family in the fight, and suddenly out of nowhere he was there, in front of her, fighting by her side once again. Her heart had soared from joy and she had found new strength that she did not know she possessed. From that day until now, things had gone back to how it was before he had left. Well almost the same, now she felt like a giddy schoolgirl every time he was around. She felt nervous and weird, her palms sweaty, her pulse racing, light headed, she blushed more easily and always in the wrong moments. She giggled hysterically every time Daryl cracked one of his dry jokes, that had just made her snort earlier. She knew she was being ridiculous, she knew people would start to notice if she did not pull her act together soon, but she could simply not help it. It was like the idiotic behaviour forced itself out no matter how hard she tried to supress it.
"Ey, ya in there? Ya cominˋ or what?" she felt a nudge to her shoulder and her head snapped up, her eyes locking in on the most sky blue eyes she had ever seen. She shook her head slightly and forced her trail of thoughts to the back of her head. A wide smile forced her lips to part and she could feel the heat creep up her neck and cheeks. She cleared her throat and brushed off the dead leaves that were clinging stubbornly to her hot skin on her thighs. "Mmm," she had to force the sound out, she knew talking was no use, her brain went to mush when she stared into his eyes, and she turned into a blabbering airhead. No, she was definitely not gonna make an ass out of herself today. They were going hunting, the group was in desperate need of food, and she needed to concentrate. She silently walked next to Daryl through the gates, Carol giving her that same look as Maggie had given her a few minutes earlier. She felt her cheeks heat up again and she lowered her head so that her long blonde bangs would cover the blush, she would simply die if Daryl noticed it.
Being out in the quietness of the forest felt refreshing, away from the prison that some days seemed to close in on her. Away from the group and the weird looks. Just her, the animals and Daryl. Daryl was so much like her, he enjoyed the silence, she did not have to wrack her brain to come up with some nonsense to talk about with him. It was like they had this silent understanding, and right now it suited her better than most days. They had caught a string of squirrels each, a couple of rabbits and from the looks of it, it was about mid day, maybe early afternoon and she knew they had to start thinking about heading home. She wished that they could just stay out here for the night, but roaming the woods at night wasnˋt safe, even for skilled hunters like they were.
She wiped her forehead that was now drenched in sweat and she tied up her hair in a loose bun on the top of her head. The heat and the humidity was almost suffocating her. She felt a bottle being shoved into her hands, she looked at the bottle filled with clear water, and Darylˋs callous fingers wrapped around it. She blinked and took it, as she took a large swig of the cool water she gave him a grateful smile, earning a nod in return.
"Weˋll rest up here and then head back," he said shortly before he slumped down onto the mossy forest floor. She followed his example and had another swig before she handed him back his water bottle. Her eyes were glued to him as he took a large swig, a drop of water escaped his lips and trickled down his chin and his throat. She swallowed hard and had to tear her gaze away, the fluttery feeling she had in the pit of her stomach was too much right now, she felt the heat color her cheeks again and she ducked her head down, embarrassed that her body was acting up like this.
"Whaˋs the matter with ya, ya cominˋ down with the flu or sumthin’?" she jumped slightly when Darylˋs gruff voice suddenly broke the silence. She shook her head, trying to get a grip on herself yet again.
"No, just the heat. This summer has been pretty harsh, donˋt you think?" Daryl just shrugged his shoulders,
"Sˋ nothinˋ worse than normal, ya would tell me if sumthinˋ was up?" she nodded.
"Of course, but thereˋs nothing," she lifted her gaze and met Darylˋs squinting look. She tried to give him a reassuring smile.
"I promise," she let out what she hoped sounded like a carefree laugh. Daryl seemed to settle with her statement and they started on the long trail back to the prison.
Dinner had been cooked and almost inhaled in the common area. It was not nearly enough to satisfy their hunger completely, but at least it was something. People seemed content as her gaze went over all her familyˋs faces. She smiled to herself, it was weird how so many different people had bonded so strongly, her eyes landed on Daryl as he was sitting leaning on the railings of the staircase leading up to the second floor of cells. That was his usual spot after dinner, if they were not scheduled for guard duty out in the guard tower. Her smile grew bigger without her noticing, until she felt a slight nudge to her side. She looked over and met Carolˋs shit eating grin.
"Did you tell him yet?" she cocked a brow quizzically at Carol, Carol rolled her pretty light blue eyes at her. Carol and Maggie were probably the two females she had grown closest to in the group, Carol was almost like a mother to her and Maggie was like a sister.
"Donˋt act stupid, it doesnˋt suit you much," she pushed a string of pale blonde hair behind her ear.
"I can promise you, it's not an act, I don't know what youˋre talking about," Carol sighed deeply.
"Silly girl, itˋs obvious to everyone that you have feelings for him, you should tell him," she inhaled sharply, was she that transparent? Everyone knew about how she felt for Daryl, oh fucking christ, did Daryl know? She wished a black hole would open up and pull her under. "Donˋt look so shocked, itˋs understandable that you harbor feelings for him, he is a handsome man, and you two have been real close for a long time. I think you should tell him," she shook her head fiercely.
"Are you crazy? It would ruin everything!" she stammered almost in panic. Carol placed a calming hand on her arm.
"You should tell him, it wouldnˋt ruin a thing. But I wouldnˋt wait too long if I were you. Someone else might come along and snatch him up, right in front of your eyes. You need to get your ass in gear," Carol nodded discreetly over to the staircase where Daryl was seated, she followed Carolˋs gaze and her eyes landed on the youngest Green girl. She was laughing and smiling adoringly up at Daryl, coaxing a small smile from him in return. She could hardly believe her eyes, little miss perfect Beth Green had a thing for Daryl, and she was flirting shamelessly with him in front of her father and sister. And the worst thing was, Daryl did not seem to mind it one bit. She jumped up from the seat next to Carol and stomped up the stairs, forcing her way in between Daryl and little miss sunshine and over to her cell that she mainly used to store her belongings. She spent most nights with Daryl out in the guard tower or laying on the perch next to him, now she could not stand being around people, at least other than Daryl. She paced back and forth in her cell, she recognized the jealousy tearing at her from the inside. This was simply ridiculous, she had no claim over him, she was acting like a spoiled brat. She tried to get in control of her breathing as she pulled her hands through her hair and sunk down on the untouched bunk. She leaned her elbows on her knees and rested her face in her hands, her eyes were tearing up but she swallowed hard and forced it back. She mentally kicked herself for being so childish.
A slight rustle in the curtain hanging in front of the bars alerted her that she was no longer alone. She felt someone sit down next to her, a gentle hand rubbing comforting circles on her back.
"Hey sweetie, are you alright? What happened downstairs? You left in such a hurry," Maggie, of course it was Maggie who had followed her. Nothing went unnoticed by the brunette. She lifted her gaze and gave her bestfriend a half smile and nodded, not really ready to share the uproar of feelings going on inside of her.
"Yeah, I’m just tired from the hunt, and I think the sun kinda got to me today. Have a nasty headache brewing," Maggie looked at her for a moment, her eyes narrowing for a slight second before she nodded and continued rubbing her back.
"Alright, well then the best medicine is to get some rest. I can ask daddy if heˋs got something for the headache," she knew her friend was only trying to be helpful, but right now she only wanted to be left alone.
"No, I just need some sleep, I will be fine in the morning, I promise," she said a little more urgent than she intended. She underlined her statement with patting her bestfriends hand. Maggie let out a sigh and got up.
"You were scheduled for guard duty with Daryl tonight, Iˋll ask if Rick can cover for you," she forced a grateful smile up at her friend.
"Thank you, I appreciate it. Good night, see you in the morning,"
Maggie bid her goodnight and left her cell, she turned on her bunk and laid down facing the gray, cold wall. She was probably just overreacting because she was tired. She just needed sleep and everything would be fine in the morning. She yawned and closed her eyes. When she heard heavy footsteps nearing her cell, she knew who it was, she sighed heavily. Maybe if she pretended to sleep then he would go away, but no, she knew him better, he was not the type to play games like that.
"Hey, heard ya were sick and that ya werenˋt gonna come ta guard duty," she bit down on her lip, she hated the fact that she had to lie to him.
"Yeah, just need some sleep, have a headache," silence fell, but she knew he was still standing there behind her, probably with his crossbow slung over his shoulder, one hand tugging on the strap and the other close to his mouth where he was chewing on his cuticle. It was so typical Daryl when he felt out of place.
"Dˋya need anythinˋ?" his voice was low and more gentle then she had ever heard it. He was concerned about her, her heart started picking up speed, but she chided herself at once. Of course he would worry, they were friends. Daryl always thought about the people of the group.
"No Daryl, I just need sleep, Iˋll be fine in the morning," again there was only silence, then the known rustle when he let go of the drapes and his heavy footsteps leading away from her cell.
She swallowed hard again and shut her eyes tightly, she hated this, why had Carol pointed that out to her? It had not even crossed her mind that someone else was crushing on him besides her. The fact that the one who could steal him away was actually little perfect Beth Green, was also mind blowing. She was a nobody compared to Beth, the young girl was perfect in every way. So innocent and sweet, everyone adored her. What was she? A socially awkward outcast, who acted more like a boy than a girl. Boys had never turned their heads after her, she had always been just a buddy, athletic and booksmart. So she had done good in school, but hardly any friends and never a boyfriend. At first she had hoped that Daryl would see how similar they were and take comfort in that, and maybe realize that she was the one he needed by his side. But that was really stupid, all men had the urge to feel that they could provide and protect their woman, not be an equal. She bit down on her lip again and forced the depressing thoughts to the back of her head, she needed to sleep, maybe things would look better in the morning. Afterall she had his friendship, that was something she would never lose, and that was the most important thing.
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everlarkficexchange · 5 years
Text
Why Do I?
Author: @hutchhitched
Prompt 53: Everlark have been friends for a long time. Then this exchange happens. Person A: Why Do I even like your dumb ass? Person B: Huh? Person A: *panics* I SAID YOU HAVE A NICE ASS. [submitted by @iliveilaughiloveiread]
Rating: M
Summary: Peeta’s in love with his roommate Katniss. She thinks he has a really good set of buns. All puns intended.
Author’s note: Thanks for the prompt, @iliveilaughiloveiread. I had a lot of fun writing their banter.
“Peeta?”
“Kitchen!”
I hear Katniss throw her keys on the table in the entryway. It’s rare I know she’s there before she sneaks up on me. She’s so quiet I’ve lost track of the number of times she’s scared the shit out of me. I may have dropped a few trays of baked goods on the floor and jumped and screamed like a little girl when she’s tackled me with bear hugs and tickles. The squeals I make when her fingers slip under my shirt are so far from masculine it’s embarrassing, but I wouldn’t trade her hands on my skin for anything.
“What are you doing here, Mellark?” she asks in her throaty chuckle. “You’re not usually home on a Wednesday afternoon.”
“The kid cancelled again,” I answer, referring to the ten-year-old boy I typically tutor mid-week.
“Ah. So, it’s just us,” she replies before crossing to me and snuggling against my side. I lift both hands in the air and hug her with my elbow.
“Sorry. Cookie batter.”
She shrugs away, slumps onto a stool, and leans over the counter to observe. “Sugar?”
“Yes, Dumplin’?”
I grin at her laugh. I’m glad she’s finally rediscovered it. It’s been such a recent thing, I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of it.
“Sugar cookies?”
“Ohhhh… You’re only interested in my baked goods. Maybe I can whip up some buns for you later.” I turn my back to her and clench my ass several times until she begs me to stop. When I turn, her gray eyes sparkle with mirth, and a rare smile graces her beautiful face. When she finally chokes back her laughter, she covers her mouth with her hand and murmurs something.
“Huh?” I can’t have heard her right. There’s no way, but it’s too tempting to let go. “Why do you like my dumb ass? Is that what you said?”
She freezes, and her eyes widen slightly. She gulps several times before blurting, “I didn’t say that! I said, ‘you have a nice ass!’”
“Oh, reeeeeeally?”
“Shut up!” she barks and sprints from the kitchen. A few seconds later, her bedroom door slams, and I sigh heavily.
Katniss Everdeen will be the death of me. I’ve loved her since Kindergarten, and I have no idea how I got so lucky to be her best friend. Well, technically, I do. She used to only talk to Madge Undersee, the daughter of a local politician, and Gale Hawthorne, brooding outdoorsmen who made all the girls in our high school swoon until he graduated and enlisted in the Marine Corps. When Gale left and Madge moved to the state capital after her father became a senator, Katniss drifted through the hallways between classes like a ghost. It only took me three months to work up the nerve to approach her in the lunchroom and ask if she’d like company. Another five weeks passed before she agreed to hang out with me outside of school. Three years later, she said yes when I asked her to be my roommate during college, and we haven’t lived apart in the seven years since. It’s been the best decade of my life.
Except for that pesky little being-in-love-with-her thing. She either doesn’t know or doesn’t care. Other than the hugs she gives me, we rarely touch. The most vulnerable she’s ever been with me was when her sister was in a car wreck a few years ago and went into the hospital. Katniss fell apart that night, and I did everything I knew how to do to comfort her. I wish I could do it every day.
I wish a lot of things I’m sure will never happen. Kissing her lips. Seeing her naked. Sinking into her and losing myself. Hearing her breathy moans when she comes. My ring on her finger. Marriage. Children. Grandchildren. Growing old together. Sharing a last name.
“Give it up, Bread Boy,” I mutter. “She’s never gonna love you that way.”
I turn my attention to the cookies. The timer dings, and I pull the first batch from the oven and let them cool while I mix several different colors of icing. Minutes turn into an hour as I decorate batch after batch. I’m just finishing the last few when I hear her behind me.
“I’m hungry. You want to grab dinner?”
I’m careful to keep my face blank when I turn and take in her beautiful face. She’s vulnerable and trying not to show it. Her gray eyes are haunted, and she’s wringing her hands. As much as I’d like to tease her, she doesn’t need that right now. She’s needs reassurance and understanding.
Sometimes it sucks to do the right thing instead of pushing for what I want.
“Always,” I answer quietly and wait for her to meet my eyes. “What sounds good?”
“Carbs.
“You want bread, huh? Maybe a little bun action?” I absolutely have to wiggle my ass. In fact, I have to back up to her and shake it some more. Her face floods with color, and I wink at her.
Sometimes it’s amazing to do what I want. Screw the right thing.
“You are the worst,” she grumbles, and I laugh at her discomfiture.
“I am, but I will feed you if you’ll help me clean up the kitchen.”
“Well, that sounds like a lot of work.” She crosses to me and bumps her shoulder against my arm. Without thinking, I tug her to my chest and nestle her head underneath my chin. She wraps her arms around me, and I kiss her on the crown of her head. When she relaxes, I squeeze her until she yelps.
“You’re a lot of work,” I joke and let her go. Beyond pleased, I hide my grin at the chagrined look on her face. Maybe, just maybe, she might like me a little more than I’d realized.
****
Two days later, I come home to her car in the driveway. She’s not expecting me, I’m sure, since I was supposed to have dinner with my older brother. I didn’t bother to text her when he bailed. Instead, I decided to surprise her, so I sneak inside the house and attempt to be as quiet as possible walking down the hall. I’m about as graceful as an elephant on roller blades, so I’m surprised she doesn’t call out to me.
Her door’s open, and I can hear rustling as I approach. I pause and try to figure out if she knows I’m out there when I hear her moan. Perplexed, I peek around the doorjamb and my mouth drops open. Her legs are splayed, and her eyes are closed. Her left hand grips the headboard, and her right is shoving a piece of plastic between her legs. It takes me a second to realize it’s vibrating. She moans louder, and my eyes widen.
Katniss Everdeen is masturbating. In our house. With her door open. And I can see her.
I jerk back into the hallway quickly and stand frozen to the spot. It feels terribly wrong to stay where I am, but I’m even more terrified to move and alert her to my presence. It’s a form of exquisite torture to listen to her as her breath quickens. She’s more vocal than I expected, and I’m horrified when my dick twitches in response. Every sound from her makes me stiffen, and my jeans tent higher the longer I listen.
She curses and groans for several more minutes, and I’m powerless in her spell. My dick throbs, and I allow myself a little bit of relief by rubbing myself through the denim. I absolutely cannot jack off in the hallway. It’s unacceptable to get off to her private act. Unforgivable.
I’m about to throw all my ethics to the wind when she releases a strangled moan. It’s obvious she’s climaxing, and I can’t stand it anymore. I turn and rush from the house, praying she’s too involved in coming to hear me.
I try to calm down, but I can’t. Stumbling to the side of the house, I duck behind the honeysuckle bush that’s big enough we’ve joked it could be a secret hideout for neighborhood kids. Thankfully, no one’s there, and I grunt as my hand fists my cock.
Echoes of the erotic sounds Katniss made ping in my head, and I can’t erase the image of her fucking herself with silicone. Hunched and desperate to finish before she realizes my car’s in the driveway, I imagine her screaming my name as I tug and stroke. A stiff breeze rustles the bush shielding me from the rest of the world, and I bite my bottom lip as a thick rope shoots from me and stains the green leaves and white blossoms. The sickeningly sweet scent mingles with the smell of sex, and I shudder as I give one last squeeze and release. Quickly, I tuck back into my jeans and wipe my hand on the inside of my t-shirt. I’ve got to get back inside.
I’m frazzled when I stumble through the front door. Making as much noise as I possibly can, I call out her name and wash my hands in the kitchen sink.
“I didn’t hear you pull up,” she says from behind me, and I jump. She’s snuck up on me again.
“Huh,” I reply, desperate to appear normal. “I was out there for a while. Checking email and stuff. You know.”
“Yeah?” She arches her eyebrow and shrugs. “Slow at work, so I’m off tonight. Your plans fell through?” When I nod, she asks, “Want to watch basketball? Have dinner?”
“Sure.”
Watching sweaty men run up and down a court handling balls seems like the perfect remedy to forget how much I love the woman standing in front of me who was naked and writhing in her bed only a few minutes ago. Either that, or I’m in hell.
****
Five days later, I know I’ve entered another dimension that’s been created specifically for self-torture. I haven’t slept through the night since I saw her. I wake myself from erotic dreams and keep a roll of paper towels next to the bed to erase the evidence. I feel like I’m twelve again—unable to control what happens between my legs and experimenting every time I’m alone. I’m embarrassed by my constant state of arousal, and it’s getting harder to hide from Katniss—literally and figuratively.
I’m in the shower jerking myself with a soapy hand when she knocks on my bathroom door.
“Peeta?”
“Yeah!” My arm twitches with tension. I’m almost there.
“Hey, can you give me a ride home from work today? Getting that wheel replaced I messed up a few weeks ago.”
Her voice washes over me like velvet, and my hand moves of its own volition. I’m so close. So, so close.
“Peeta, you okay?”
She’s inside my bathroom. I can tell by the sound of her voice.
“Yeah,” I sputter. “Fine.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure,” I groan as heat rips through me. Two more strokes, and I come. I suck in my breath and choke. I can’t breathe as I cough and sputter, and her hand appears at the corner of the curtain.
“Peeta!” Alarm evident in her voice, she warns me of her intention, and I have a split second to cover my crotch with a washcloth before she peeks around the corner. Her eyes narrow as I continue to hack, and I raise my right hand to cover my mouth. I slip slightly and brace my left on the wall, leaving the washcloth draped over my very prominent erection, which she’s clearly just noticed.
“H-holy shit,” she stammers. “I’m so sorry. I—” She bolts from the bathroom, and I rip back the curtain, grab a towel, and stagger after her on shaky legs.
“Katniss! Wait!”
She’s wide-eyed and frozen in the hallway when I emerge from the steam-filled room. The towel still tents slightly, but the absurdity of the situation and my recent ejaculation has deflated my hard-on significantly. I’m as mortified as she is until I realize I’m dripping wet and only in a towel in the hallway with the love of my life.
“You were choking,” she blurts. “It sounded like you were dying.”
“I know. It’s fine.” I rush to assure her I understand.
She stares at my chest, and I almost cover myself before I realize she seems completely dazed. Water droplets run down my stomach, and her eyes follow them. I’m not sure what to say, so I remain quiet, hoping somehow things won’t get any more awkward than they already are.
“I shouldn’t have…I mean, I didn’t know you were… I, uh… Yeah.”
I reach for her shoulder, and my towel shifts. Her eyes widen as I grasp it closed. Her eyes lift to mine, and I’m struck at the wonder in them. Frozen for several seconds, I study her until she takes a step toward me. And then another. And another until she lifts her hand and grazes her fingertips across my stomach. I suck in air and hold it while she traces the curve of my torso.
I exhale in a rush when she toys with the edge of the towel and tugs it from my skin. I let go, and the damp cloth pools at my feet. Her eyes rake over me, and the hunger is raw when she finally meets my eyes.
“I…” The words get caught in her mouth, and I watch her for a sign before leaning down and brushing my lips against hers. I don’t dare open my eyes until I feel her arms slide around my back, and then I crush her to me and tilt my head to kiss her deeper.
I lose track of time as we stand there. My body sizzles as my skin warms and the water evaporates. Her body is pliant and firm against mine. Her hands tug at my neck and trail down my back to the top of my hip bones but don’t go any lower. Her clothes stick to me, and I have a vague recollection that she’s already dressed for work as I wind her thick braid around my palm. I don’t ever want to stop.
She releases a breathy moan, and I press her against the wall and push against her. My knee slides between her legs, and I can feel the heat at her center as her tongue slides over mine. I tug her shirt from the waistline of her pants and grunt when my palm hits her smooth skin.
I rip my mouth from hers and suck on the hollow below her ear. “You feel so good,” I mumble in a tortured whimper.
“Peeta,” she moans, and my hips jerk against her when her hands slide down and cup my ass. All those jokes about buns ripples in the shared sexual tension that increases steadily as she kneads and cups me. Not surprisingly, I’m turned on again, and my cock behaves like a heat-seeking missile. I rub against her groin, and she grinds into me.
A nagging voice tells me to stop, to pull back, but I don’t want to listen to reason—only what her body’s telling me. I don’t understand anything except the way we fit together. I maneuver her a few steps over until she stumbles backward into her room and onto her bed. I stretch over her and wrap her legs around my waist. She moans as I thrust my hips against hers until she moves in rhythm under me. A few seconds later we’re dry-humping like teenagers.
I can feel the seam of her pants against my dick, and she squirms until her breath catches. When it does, I press against her and watch in disbelief as she unravels underneath me.
“Right there,” she begs. “Don’t stop. Right there.”
I buck against her, pushing the material against her clit until she spasms and quakes in my arms. She pants and moans as her body trembles, and I realize I’ve just pushed the woman I love over the edge. I made her come, and I didn’t even have to get her naked.
When she stills under me, I’m suddenly aware of our situation. I’m naked on top of her, and she’s just climaxed inside her pants. Her work clothes are rumpled, soiled, and damp, and I’ve got my second raging boner of the morning. It’s so ridiculous, I can’t help but laugh.
“You’re laughing at me?!”
Before I can process her question, I’m flat on my back, and she’s glaring down at me from the side of her bed. Infuriated, her gray eyes flash, and her hands are clenched at her sides.
“No!” I protest and smirk when she looks down at my junk. It’s both incredibly embarrassing and equally thrilling that she’s seeing me naked (again) and seems to like it.
“Then what is it? I’m bad at this? I didn’t live up to expectations? What?” She spits her interrogation so fast, my head spins. I grab the sheet and cover myself. I’m starting to shrink, and that’s definitely not what I want her to see.
“Katniss, you are absolutely not bad at this. Not even close to bad. More like fucking amazing.”
“Really?” Her voice is so small I almost can’t hear it.
“Hell, yes! I just— I mean, that was not how I expected that to happen.”
“Expected what to happen?”
“Us!” I blurt and snap my mouth shut. I hadn’t intended to admit just how much I’d been wanting to kiss her.
She grins and sits on the edge of the bed next to me. “You’ve been planning that?”
I nod and lean over to kiss her cheek. “For the past twenty years or so. You have no idea the effect you have.”
She blushes and ducks her head. “Well, I might have a little bit of an idea,” she says and nods toward my lap. “You going to take care of that?”
My face burns at her insinuation. “I don’t think that’s going to be necessary,” I answer in a desperate attempt to regain some dignity.
“Who said anything about necessary?” she teases and attempts to pull the sheet back.
I want to so badly. I almost ache with it, but this is not the right time. I want hours with her. I want the rest of my life. I don’t want our first time to be a quickie on a weekday morning when we both have to be out the door in less than an hour.
“I can’t believe this, but we both need to go to work. You’re probably gonna want to change, and I’m going to try to save face and walk out of here without worrying about you watching my bare ass as I go away.” Before I can think about her ogling me, I stand and cross to her door. “We’ll talk later, okay?”
“Sure,” she agrees. “And Peeta?”
“Yeah?” I poke my head back in her room for her answer.
“I’m still not exactly sure why I like your dumb ass, but you really do have a nice one.”
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saintcheesus · 5 years
Note
If you're still accepting prompts, maybe John wingmanning for Arthur to help him get with Charles. Thanks in advance if you decide to write this
I love this nonny! 
------
I am convinced that Charles has taken to chopping wood in front of me solely to drive me mad. He started taking his shirt off just last week, on account of this damn heat...
“Take your shirt off too, if you hot then. 
Arthur slammed his journal shut faster than John had ever seen. John laughed at how red in the face Arthur became, it suited him better than that sourpuss one he was always sporting. 
“Goddammit, Marston! Why you standing here for?” 
“You must have been awful distracted to not realize my shadow been over you since you was writing. When you gonna sketch him shirtless?” 
Arthur grumbled and looked away. 
“I already did...” he mumbled shortly after. John smiled at that and sat down next to his big brother. Just like Abigail showed him, he snatched the book from Arthur so deftly that by the time he reacted to the air in his hands, John had already managed to sneak a quick peek of the rough sketch. It wasn’t for longer than a few seconds, unfortunately, because Arthur was just as quick taking it back. John was also gifted a swift but firm slap to the back of the head. He thought he was twelve again, but just like then, he shook it off. 
“Why don’t you show him the sketch?” 
“Right, suppose I’ll just mosey up to him and say something foolish like, ‘Hey Charles come look at this sketch I have of you while I watched you chop wood for an hour!’ I’m sure he’ll be real keen on that, John. You moron.” 
“Sure, but then y’all get to chatting and then who knows what could happen from there.” 
John snuck a glance at his brother and his heart twinged a bit at the sight of someone he idolized (not like he’ll ever tell Arthur) for being the gang’s hero of sorts, look so helpless. 
“I ain’t good at talking to folks, John. My best skills is fighting and shooting. Ain’t much room for talk during those.” 
“Arthur you was nearly married.” 
He was considering mentioning Eliza too, but Arthur still shuts down hard whenever there might be room for her to be mentioned. 
“Mary’s different...she’s--” 
“A woman.” John finished. Arthur’s resigned nod and sad face was the answer. 
“What if Charles don’t...what if he don’t like men?” 
“What if he does?” 
“What if he don’t like me?” 
That sounded like it physically hurt Arthur to think that way, and John was not about to let Arthur doubt himself into not asking Charles. He wasn’t sure why Arthur forgot about that period before Mary where he fucked. Men and women alike. It was a short window of time but Arthur still owes John favors for covering for him all the times he snuck his lovers into camp. 
“Wouldn’t be surprised if that was the case. It’s like you said, John. I was nearly married, but I ain’t because she ain’t want me. She weren’t even the first to say that.” 
John never really cared much for Mary, and hearing how sad and insecure that break-up made him just makes him mad all over again. 
“I ain’t good enough for him.” 
John didn’t mean to have the conversation take this turn, Arthur was clearly upset enough that he sighed and left his spot on the grass. John watched as Arthur schlepped away to his tent. John turned his attention back to Charles, who had just taken a break from his chore. He was wiping sweat off his brow, his eyes caught John’s. He smiled and waved, John was more than happy to return the gesture. The topless man then walked over to him and joined him in Arthur’s old spot. 
“How are you, John?” 
“Reckon I could be better. Getting a bit restless, I’m probably going to head out soon.” 
Charles hummed. John suddenly had an idea. 
“Charles do you want to go hunting with me? I saw a bunch of rabbits not too far from here, and deer too, they was making babies all winter so there’s plenty of them.” 
Charles laughed and nodded. 
“Sure, I’ll grab my gear and meet you at the horses.” 
John tipped his head and waited for Charles to leave before darting over to Arthur, who still looked as miserable as ever, scribbling away in his journal. He was drawing Cain.  
“Arthur! Arthur let’s go hunting!” 
“I don’t want to, go away!” 
“I want you to come with me.” 
“Always nice to try somethings for ourselves, I reckon.” He deadpanned 
John was getting irritated, but he wasn’t going to stop. 
“Please Arthur? We ain’t really done much with each other outside of missions. You might not miss my company so much but some times...well...you know...” 
Arthur sighed loudly and John smiled, knowing that he won. Arthur put his journal away and then put his hat on. 
“Come on then, the sun’s about ready to start setting and ain’t no use hunting in the dark.” 
John was as giddy as a child and practically ran over to his horse. Charles was already waiting there. John wished he had a camera to capture the priceless face that he had when he saw Arthur walking over with him. It was sheer delight, and John nearly pummeled his brother for thinking that he wasn’t interested. When John looked at Arthur, the man’s face was pale as all hell. He had his lasso on-hand in case Arthur was thinking about booking it back to his tent. Instead, he shook it off and smiled at Charles. 
“Morning, Charles.” 
John wanted to laugh so bad. Arthur sounded like a love-sick teenager, he wasn’t even this bad with Mary! He even batted his eye lashes at him! Charles chuckled and placed a hand on his shoulder. He rubbed it with his thumb. His thumb! John thought he was going to combust! He knew Arthur had a penchant for being stupid but he didn’t think Charles had a bit of the fool gene in him too. 
“John didn’t tell me you were coming with us.” 
Arthur giggled as he anxiously fiddled with his horse, Artie. She was a good girl.
“It’s funny...he ain’t tell me neither.” 
Arthur’s eyes flicked over to John’s and the man knew he was going to get his ass beat the moment they came back to camp. It would be worth it, he decided. 
Charles smoothly mounted Taima, and patted her gently. John could have sworn he saw Arthur swoon at the sight. This was bad, this was the worst he’d ever seen someone. He was definitely telling Tilly and Hosea about this. 
“If I had known, I would have dressed better.” 
John had never heard Arthur snort while laughing ever, but today was full of firsts for the both of them. The cowboy’s face was beet-red as he nervously laughed. Maybe John should have told him beforehand, but he didn’t want the man getting cold feet and never come. Charles started riding off, leaving the two brothers to follow. 
“Did John tell you what we were going to hunt?” Charles started the conversation. Arthur seemed to have calmed down, that was good. 
“No, did he tell you?” 
They were talking about him like he wasn’t right there. They really were made for each other. 
“Rabbits.” 
“Yeah cause y’all about to be fucking like them”, John thought. 
“I think I know what he’s talking about, there’s a clearing in the forest that’s just a bit further out from camp. We could spend the night there, since it’s already near sundown.” 
Charles flashed another smile at him and nodded. 
“Sounds like a good idea. You brought your bow?” 
Arthur pulled it from his horse’s holster. 
“Good. You’re really good with that thing. Didn’t even need to really teach you.” 
Arthur tipped his head downward so that you couldn’t really make out his face, but John was next to him and could see that he was grinning from ear-to-ear. It really warmed John’s heart to see him so touched. Only lover he had that was nearly as kind to him as Charles was Eliza. People weren’t truly kind to Arthur, very few were. John wasn’t very kind to him either, not after he deserted him for a year. But he was trying to make it up, Charles would be good for Arthur. Arthur just seemed so lonely most days and melancholic, besides himself, Hosea, and Sadie, Charles was the only other one to try and make him feel good about himself. Of course this is all considering the fact that they both love-sick buffoons who needed one non love-sick buffoon like John Marston to help them get together. It was working so far. 
They finally got to that clearing that Arthur mentioned and along the way, they saw rabbits, deer, and even a few turkeys. They were definitely going to have decent meals coming their way. Charles and Arthur were both dismounting when John whistled for Charles to come over to him. 
“Why are you still on your horse? Come down, set up camp with us.” 
“I’ll catch up with y’all later on, I think there was a...a...legendary rabbit up that way. It’s best if we split up to cover more ground, and y’all are better hunters than me so if you stay here you’ll catch all these critters.” 
Charles crossed his arms and smirked. He looked like he caught John’s drift but then maybe Charles just always looked charming. He exhaled and nodded after quiet deliberation. 
“Alright, but I’m telling Arthur before he starts to worry after you.” 
Before John could stop him, Charles turned and shouted, “John’s heading further up, he’ll come back tonight!” 
Arthur shouted back, “If you get into any trouble shoot your gun twice so we can come get you, you hear?” 
“Sure.” 
“You got water? Food? Bullets?” 
“Yes, Arthur!” 
“Don’t come back no later than noon neither, can’t have you running off on us again.” 
Arthur did this when he was a kid and he’s still doing it now. He was grown! He was twenty-six he knew how to pack for a hunting trip! He huffed and began walking away from the two of them. He found a patch of grass on a hill not more than five minutes away from them. When he got to the top he managed to coax his horse to lay down and have a nap with him. When they woke it was well past mid-night. Tiredly, he and his horse trudged back to the campsite where he found that the fire was still lit. He also realized that there was only two tents pitched up instead of three. He went to walk over to the second tent but he kicked an empty can of beans, and Artie got spooked because of it, she huffed two strong gusts of wind in his face. She also woke Arthur up. He came out of the tent with just his pants thrown on haphazardly. When he saw John standing there he put his hands on his hips. 
“You been gone all that time and ain’t bring nothing back? Ain’t you the one that wanted to hunt?”  
“He was a slippery bastard.” 
“Shut up, I see the drool marks on your face, idiot.” 
John crossed his arms. Arthur started to let up. 
“If you was sleeping then you wasn’t eating. Come on, Charles and I made a plate for you.” 
John realized that there were at least ten rabbits, two turkeys, and a buck who was big feller. His stomach growled when Arthur placed the plate in his hands. The food was still warm. It was beans, corn, and turkey. Much better than anything Pearson ever cooked. While he was scarfing it down, Charles came out of the same tent Arthur did, also half-naked. He was yawning while he walked over to Arthur and kissed the man on his bare shoulder. 
“Why did you leave?” 
“Because John came back and nearly let my horse die of shock.” 
Accused man swallowed his food and said very sternly, “I did not!” 
Charles woke up after hearing John’s voice and it was his turn to blush. Arthur’s composure was much better than earlier today. He was smiling at John teasingly. 
“Yes, you’ll be glad to know your little plan worked.” 
“Do I gotta leave camp again to let y’all finish or are you done?” 
Arthur rolled his eyes and waved his little brother away as he turned to go back into the tent. 
“Shut up and go back to bed after you finish eating, that tent’s pitched over there for you. Charles and I will see you in the morning because I ain’t about to let you return to camp empty-handed.” 
Charles followed behind Arthur dutifully as they went back into their tent. Once the camp got quiet again all John could do was childishly mock him before doing exactly as he was told. 
At least Arthur got his man, though. 
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ramblingshit · 5 years
Text
Fright Night - 2011 - 2/5
we start , very, very high. its ominous to begin, the dreamworks opening dark and spooky and slow. scrawled font glides across dark stormy clouds and we're over a small square, isolated suburb. a house is on sale. that's the Charmed font.
oh my god what is that david tennant what the fuck was not expecting that.okay so this is a modern Fright Night.  and david tennant sis peter vincent. okay what a jump scare just happened the dog is scared, and this girl is dead and he's covered in blood and holy shit its the senator. wow the bed was bloody where his dad was scrambling for the gun hidden beneath the mattress that the boy finds. oh his dads body is sliding away and what the fuck is that im scared what the hell holy shit. ohh cool title card. nice symmetry in the birds eye. just a happy, normal small neighbourhood, everyone is diverse and happy and the kids are playing outside. holy shit its that dead guy poor ol mate.oh its hereditary mum.  they got a chill equal relationship just chatting like friends more than parent adn child. and the mum's intelligent and assertive and smart and a real estate agent. this is very very different from the original fright night. is it really the same movie? is it oh its the girl from 28 weeks later nice she's hot and eyy pumped up kicks is playing damn. I'm pretty sure they're both like 25 and playing as  oh holy shit its like zac efron's brother. trumping all over stereotype. what the hell its the weird super bad creepy guy comedian dude 'Brewster' it's the weird cackling kid. they've got relationship issues they're both geeks but brewster got hot and with the hot girl and rose through the 'social ranks' and they had to stop being friends. weird kid is threatening to show all his new friends embarrassing stuff from the past. oh my fucking god oh my god colin farrell. holy shit. oh my god. and damn she is Amy I'm forgetting everything cause its so different. he's charming and fucking hot and buff with like a paled face.being all charming and neighbourly. wife beater and silver necklace and damn the way he bit that apple. what are they doing here crawling through the doggy door who's adam. outta nowhere weird kid tells him jerry's a vampire, like a 'by the way' situation where are they going why does he have a cross and stake? they just added a stock door opening noise. they're telling the realisations of hm being a vampire without actually showing any of it and the weirdo kid is the one interested and telling brewster that jerrys a vampire like what first he's not even met him he hasn't been involved or around him at all and now he's adamantly trying to argue that he is a vampire?? in the original brewster was obsessed and found out quick to the start all by himself and half the trouble was trying to convince everyone else too. now one of his friends is trying to convince him?? what?? and they're mentioning Twilight and weird kid is saying how he's not broody or whatever like show us what his personality is like why are you saying this it's like this long ass dialogue chunk in the middle of a completely irrelevant situation, all about Jerry. fucking weird man what the fuck. we've seen the guy once. he's got evidence? why are they in this house? why is this happening? this was the Charley show - his journey from fear to sorting Jerry out and his tension with the guy the weird kid was basically comedic effect now he's premature exposition guy? and he's the one who thought of peter vincent cause it showed him watching him all the time but now its the weird kid convincing him and now they're having relationship problems and brewster fkn pushed him damn son use your words wow he's a fucking asshole like die dude the fuck. oh damn what the fuck the bully just grabbed him off his bike fr riding down his street like its his turf what the hell there's like four streets in this suburb and now they're fighting who wrote this why bother calling it fright night its a whole nother (fkn messy shit) story he's literally chasing him over the fence like he wants to kill him damn this isn't bullying  fuck. what is this movie? oooooh jerry is hottttt i love me a murdererous manly man. weird kid is in big trouble. oh my god. oh my god did they get him to play fake grindelwald because of his role in this. damn he's turning weird kid and the cross falls dramatically from his hand. ohh he's a fuckin dick to his friend and now he's feelin all guilty and worried and reminiscing about the time he wasn't an asshole to his friend. wow we're not even half an hour in and half the original movie is gone and replaced by whatever high school drama movie this is.he walked into weird kid's room and didn't turn the light on? yeah alright. what the fuck. why is peter vincent fkn that 'sexy' emo magician man who was popular -Chris Angel Mindfreak. he found a laptop with evidence that jerry's a vampire videos on it. and here's Jerry and what's happening ahaha he's not gonna invite him in and its physically uncomfortable standing at the door he's literally stuck at the door and it's really really obvious.  damn that was cool though passing the beer through the doorway and the communication in their eyes and now he's perving on his mum is this acting intentional? like he looked really unsure what to do with himself was that in character or?? he's looking around all paranoid he's perving on all the girls he's threatening him really obviously i can't tell if i like it more than the smooth suave chilling conversation that was driving charley mad at the start of the other one. jerry telling him to 'manage' the women in his life cause its his job to keep them safe. now they're doing the distracted disinterested in Amy play and she's the one coming onto him strong  and what are we gonna see this. this is literally worse acting than the screaming kid in the first one it's like halfhearted. now the movie's settling in for like a spookier, much darker version of the  nah nevermind its like a padded retelling. there's no billy in this one, just Jerry - who's gonna cover him during the day? original was a squad effort movie - bunch of kids and an old man going up against a vampire. not anymore its just this obviously mid 20s guy sneaking around in a dark house to quiet, eerie music. wait he's in Jerry's house? oh cause Jerry drove off. ooh Jerry's got awesome creepy office with spooky drawings on the walls why is this place so dark goddamn turn on the lightswitch. he's got costumes for hunting damn that's cool. and here he returns uh oh run charley run. try escape the vampire now that you're in his lair. a secret door to like a jail block in the wall? what he's letting himself be close in? what is he doing how did Jerry whip this up?jumpscare lol lame it's Doris. you telling me he's gonna lockpick the lock okay he's never done it before but okay. god he's hot. the swooning blond in the arms of a vampire. it's like hella horrific oh my god she just shushed Charley where he hid in the other room. drinks from her all orgasmic and tosses her back in the room. damn he looks good with a bloodstained mouth lickinn his lips and shit. good luck picking with a bobby pin you're hilarious holy fuck she's tiny, like a limp ragdoll. ew why is he watching skanky girls on TV. tryna tell me he's watching the TV so loud that he can't hear they panting and crying. yeah he can he's outta the chair - there's no reflection and he's like crying damn this is tense. such a nice house. strutting around, drinking beer, vaguely amused at everything. he just caught an apple. it's like he knows something amusing no one else does.  but does he actually kno-- oh my god yeah he does that's awesome. oh holy fucking shit holy shit holy fucking shit she was a vampire she fucking exploded in the sunlight. his jumper s covered in her ash that's messed, Jerry stood inside listening and laughing to himself as he bit into the apple. now he's out here being the one looking up peter vincent - that entire start was completely pointless they should've cut out all of the weird kid stuff. now he's snubbing his girlfriend too this is how it should have all begun here comes david tennant. what the hell he's pulling a secret swipe identity thing to try get in to see vincent and vincent is a gross slimeball of a david tennant why are all these men slimy he's pretending to be a reporter she's walking around in a bra, vincent is an expert on vampires and the lot - not just using what he learned from doing his show and now she's using 'little girl' as a derogatory term for vincent. okay not the most attractive bod and i hate tattoos tbh at this point its true. god this whole thing is so edgy and wow okay here we go his hair is so much betterokay damn holy shit. it was the hair the hair was fucking me up okay holy damn all his facial hair is fake. and thank god his eyebrow piercing - wait nevermind all that 'expert' stuff was bulll? or is he mucking around? okay no its bull he isn't an expert. i can't believe how much hair affects someone. oh and his tattoo are right as well. damn he sounds schizo and vincent is fkn cold and that is some bad cgi and trying to be so dramatic its just a filter over the shot. oh and here's  zac efrons brother and eternal grunge guy.  ohh he's got creepy long nails and oh damn eating them and there's the blood oh fuck why is that hot im so disturbed. he's shaving stakes and its mum who confronts him and he's awwkard about it and now they've referenced 'Dark Shadows' as well as Twilight. these highschoolers are so serious and mature tryna talk to each other and here's Jerry at the door.this is a game to him but she's sticking up for her son and Jerry thinks its awesome or is it just oh damn he's coming back with a shovel and a power saw?? what's he doing??? where's he going oh my god what's he doing the girls are slowly realising that he might be right what is he digging up.flinging huge chunks of earth around. oh uh oh oh FUCK  THAT:s  GAS HOLY SHIT are you serious Jerry no holy daaaaaaamn he's blowing up their house I love it ahahaha 'dont need an invitation if there's no house' that is hilarious oh my god as if they're going to get out with what really he's gonna  oh wait he''s gonna take the dirt bike what the fuck he just threw the bike at them what is happening is this Michael bay. and now he's ramming them fuck he really wants them dead damn oh ahahah they have a tank of a car driving getting hit by a bike, smashing through a vampire and his big ass car. is he-- he's under the car that's amazing yeah okay like they survived that too oh he just lifted up the car oh what the fuck he looks like that shark guy from batman oh no why does he look like that who made him look like a shark he's eating that guy blood squirting, he's very animalistic like twitchy and shit too  black eyes eats a guy, morphs into something evil blood stained mouth cars all fucked up and he turns around 'hey' he greeted jovially, the girls run away - the mum just leaves her son to face off a vampire? yeah, okay. - and he calls 'catch you later!' damn some of this is gold and other bits are trash but so far they're evening each other out. he's oh damn he grabbed the cross and it lit on fire and he's got charley and was gonna stake him but mum popped up and shanked him through the shoulder with one of her real estate signs that's so lame, but he's screeching and flinging himself around making growling noises and now mum's fainted and hit her head and jerry's twitching out with a oh okay he hit him with his car again. jerry's all kinds of fucked but he heals up fine soon enough. vincent isn't charming; there's too much sex and money and cynical and assholey and its grotesque compared to the teenageriness of the original. and now mum's out for the count at the hospital lol  what's happening. he's shitting on the idea to call the police that's hilarious he wouldn't stop calling them in the first. i dunno i keep comparing them because these are the bits i 100% liked better in the other one. now he's talking about weird kid who disappeared ages ago. he's a loser - she likes him cause he's different; she's the popular girl who didn't want an ass bully to date. vincent's a drunk on top of everything. but he does know his stuff about vampires. there's different species different breeds - Jerry's a tribal snacker who keeps his victims alive for days and oh damn its weird kid he's a black eyed vampire and he's mad Jerry got him Vincents in his panic room the bra girl is dead weird kids arms off and now Jerry's coming and weird kid's twitching out and he looks like a wolf shark and they're being vulgar again he's hunting them down this is a serious relationship drama issue. if they're strong enough to like bend metal how did grabbing him hard around the neck not immediately crush it. they're fighting - like what; charley just took a deep clawing across the chest they're blocking and slashing and every ones smashing stuff and he just got weird kid at the neck and uh oh she's in trouble but she's got a gun but he's barely flinching oh what. how did she know that was holy water the cup was up too high for her to see there was even any water in it. dude they're strong when its plot convenient - how do these guys know how to fight with weapons he's just so chill with that slash across the chest. ahaha what the fuck she's like urging him to kill him aha he stabbed him all drama and she's in survivor mode like fuck outta the way everyone oh good he's pretty again. i'm disappointed no jerry/amy stuff though tbh she's spicy, he thinks this is a great time. he's just hunting them and its nightclub time are they gonna do the jerry amy thing no he grabbed her by the throat oh damn oh okay no that was pretty hot he's got a slash on his chest and the bouncers just grabbing it and he doesn't react fuck sake 0 that was pretty cool if not exactly what i wanted - he properly vampired her: blood on his lips he kissed her and it drugged her enough to take her neck in the middle of the club. and now a vampire killed vincent's parents and that's why he's a drunk but how'd he become a magician what's that got to do with anything. damn highschooler dropping moral truthbombs that immediately make adults change their mind immediately and wanna help him. how does that car still drive. this is so gay like he is overreacting he's dressed to go to war - i forgot he burned their house down he's got a fucking crossbow and he's dressed in like military shit and he's swinging the crossbow around like he's in the military, did they tell him to take this serious or like he shoulda been an awkward stumbling kid oh what the damn they'res a secret like basement damn he just broke a hip how is all of this under his house didn't just move in???he switched on the first light in the whole movie and it barely lit anything up so lame. so extra oh damn that tiddy damn nice just dodged an arrow oh fo real really is he the vampire who killed vincent's parents are you serious that's so lame. and now Amy's  what the fuck why is there like an entire institution beneath this house what is this. oh its the tribe?? they live in the dirt whoop her eyes are black but vincent's got a dramatic black leather jacket and a stake gun that just fucked up and he's just gonna stake her straight up they barely gave her time for her scary wide face he just stabbed her and ran and now she's eating her own blood and whoop vincent's being eatenoh really how did he know there was sunlight up there aren't we in the base meant isn't this place made of cement. damn he's hot with his shirt open. he just hissed at the beam of sunlight. even his fingernail burns oh that's cool he's in teh shadow and charleys in the sun beams as he taunts him about Amy and vincent's turning ahaha  and they're gonna wait til the sun goes down and in the meantime he's gonna like fuck amy in front of charley ahaha nice drinking bloods like sex. oh yeah okay what he's gonna what he's expecting to go up in flames what the fuck he'd oh no okay what the fuck as if. as the fuck if. first of all, charley is human and a crazed vampire is not and are you joking me that charley could survive being thrown around plus he's fucking on fire that should have destroyed him by now fucking burned to a crisp oh im so disappointed and okay yea being a vampire was just dark spirits? and now everyones free to die of their wounds aha jesus. his clothes would have seared into his skin, his goggles would have melted but no, completely unscathed. so lame. oh that was such a slow awkward dialogue. weird like one liner jokes throughout are we in vegas? oh nice they're fucking i really don't care i don't wanna see these 25 year olds why do we care what happens now Jerry's dead. jesus that was bad. please im so upset. oh well sometimes 1980s camp horror is better than cheap rushed or at least badly edited modern ones. disappointing man.
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exceedinglyregular · 6 years
Note
Prompt: Andrew finds out that Steven likes men with beards so he decides to grow one. Although he does learn that Steven loves him regardless, Steven still is quite into beard burn and he won't say no to Andrew growing his stubble/beard (Not necessarily NSFW, kinda up to you on the frontier).
Title: Growing on Me
(ao3 link for those who prefer: here)
Andrew’s trying his best to focus on this video he’s supposed to be editing but it’s hard to when his boyfriend is literally sitting across him, laughing his sweet ass off. Steven and Jen are going through a bunch of BuzzFeed quizzes just for the fun of it and they are having an absolute blast.
After a few more failed attempts at concentrating on the task at hand, Andrew decides to stop here for now. He yanks his headphones off and just when he does that, he hears Steven commenting on one of the options in the quiz.
“…definitely the bearded guy. Men with beards are HOT!” That’s information Andrew definitely needed to hear.
Andrew walks around the desk to cross over to where Jen and Steven are sat. As he approaches, Jen looks up from the screen to greet him, Steven is still too consumed by the questions laid in front of him.
“What’s this?” Andrew asks, intrigued. He rests a hand on the table and leans forward, trying to read what’s being displayed.
“Pick your favorite looks and we’ll tell you who’s your true soulmate,” Steven reads right off the screen. “I wonder who I’ll get…” Steven must see something in Andrew’s face that isn’t there as he immediately starts backtracking. “I mean y-you-… you! …you are the one for me, of course! I just- this is just- The quiz mean nothing, Drew!”
Andrew cackles loudly, causing a few heads to turn. He honestly can’t believe what just happened, they should’ve been filming it.
“I’m not mad, don’t worry.” And Steven breathes a huge sigh of relief, Jen is clearly amused by this exchange as she’s giggling away. Andrew gestures at the laptop. “Keep going, I’m curious too.”
After several minutes of in-depth pondering, Steven finally reaches the last question and…
“OH MY GOD!” Steven jumps out of his chair, and is stumbling over the wires running across the floor. Jen is screaming like a crazed sports fan whose team just won. The entire office is looking over at them but only for a brief moment, these kinds of outbursts are more than common around here.
Andrew reaches out and turns the laptop to face him so that he can get a better look at the result. It reads…
You got: Andrew Ilnyckyj! BuzzFeed’s very own ‘creepy’ guy. Don’t let that cool, stoic exterior fool you, he is secretly a lovable goofball. A man of many talents, Andrew is more than capable of whipping up a scrumptious dinner for you, and can even charm your socks off with his wide history and geography knowledge. Plus, he loves animals too! Who said the perfect guy doesn’t exists?
That little snippet put a hot blush on Andrew’s face. He doesn’t even think he’s that much of a catch, much less being ‘the perfect guy’. Steven appears to disagree as he pulls Andrew in for a kiss, hands wrapping around his waist.
“So does the quiz still mean nothing?” Andrew asks when they part. Steven’s grip on his waist tightens, and he brings his face in closer. Their breaths mingle as Steven replies in a low voice.
“Yes. I don’t need a dumb quiz to tell me anything.”
So that soulmate quiz thing may actually be accurate but… Andrew’s not taking his chances. It took him so long to finally get into a relationship with Steven, he’s going to do everything in his power to see it through. Even if said ‘everything’ is going to get uncomfortable for him.
Andrew has scratched at his jaw over twenty times for the last few minutes, so it’s no surprise that it caught his boyfriend’s attention.
“Beard problems?” Steven asks the next time he sees Andrew scratching away. Andrew stops mid-scratch, he smiles, hoping to make it look like less of a problem than it actually is.
“No, just…” He then continues scratching when he can’t stand the itch. “…really itchy”
“Why don’t you shave it off then?” Steven suggests nonchalantly, taking another bite of his pizza. Andrew feels his heart sink, if Steven is suggesting that… Does he think Andrew can’t handle a little prickling? Granted, what he has on his face is more stubble than beard, and he already has this much difficulty living with it. Maybe he should just- No. Andrew shakes his head, he’s not giving up.
“N-no, it’s fine. Just needs some time to get used to it, that’s all.” Andrew replies, aggressively rubbing the side of his face in hopes of ending the irritation.
“Oh-kay…” is all Steven says, continuing with consuming his lunch.
Damn the itchiness, Andrew’s just gonna have to grin and bear with it. He’s going to make Steven swoon so hard with his beard, and no amount of irritation is going to stop him.
Andrew picks up another slice, focusing on the chewing and the swallowing and the flavor, and pushing any thoughts of his facial hair to the back of his mind.
It’s been two whole weeks since Andrew has seen his boyfriend, and he wants to make Steven’s six-hour flight from New York completely worth the time. Andrew went ahead and tracked down the very quiz that Steven took to find that specific image of that bearded man. It took hours of preparation but Andrew thinks he has the look nailed down.
Andrew watches as waves of people pass him, he checks the time. Steven should be out by now. Just as he thinks this, Steven steps out of the arrival hall looking all around like a lost child searching for their parent at a mall. Andrew chuckles to himself and walks over to the bewildered man who is still looking the wrong direction.
“Hey kiddo, are you lost?” Andrew puts on a comically deep voice and a playfully concerned face. Steven spins around immediately, not yet recognizing his own boyfriend standing in front of him.
“No sir, I-… Andrew?!” His eyebrows rise up so high that they almost disappear into his white cap. Steven’s checking him out up and down, and Andrew is feeling just a little self-conscious to have that kind of attention on him, in public no less. “Is this your Halloween costume? Are you going as Adam?”
“What? No…” Andrew looks down at his clothing, which Steven is now thoroughly inspecting and oh god. He has a red and blue plaid shirt on, black skinny pants and with the beard… it’s the holy trinity of the iconic Bianchi look. All he’s missing is the glasses, which he fortunately doesn’t need. “I just… I heard that you’re really into guys with beards so…”
Steven laughs at that and it’s the most cute, innocent laughter Andrew has ever heard. Steven’s bent at the waist and doubled over, shaking with mirth. When he finally regains his composure, they are tears in his eyes that he has to wipe away. Andrew doesn’t understand what’s so funny.
“Oh my god, Drew! I wasn’t trying to hint at you or anything!” There’s a little tingle that runs down Andrew’s spine, like always when Steven calls him by that nickname. It’s sorta distracting him from the moment.
“I… I didn’t think you were, just thought that maybe I should take a little initiative…?” Andrew shrugs, unsure of how to explain his thought process.
“Even so, I don’t think Adam is a good look on you.” He frowns and yeah, Andrew already has thoughts to rework his style. Still, he feels it’s important to explain his intention here.
“I just want to make you happy,” Andrew kinda mumbles, not moving his lips as much as he should, as if he’s ashamed to admit it. He stares down at the floor like a shy high-schooler asking someone out to prom.
When he finally gathers enough courage to sneak a look at Steven… he is looking at Andrew like he’s the biggest dummy on the planet. He takes a step towards Andrew and brings a hand up to cup his face, soft fingers gently stroking his beard.
“And you do. I love you, Andrew… beard or no beard, it doesn’t matter.” Steven’s smiling at him with the intensity of a thousand suns, and the warmth bursting through Andrew’s heart matches it in magnitude. It’s sappy but true.
“I know. I love you too.” Andrew closes the distance between their lips, and maybe it’s from missing him so much but Steven’s lips taste way sweeter than Andrew ever remembered. Even over the hubbub of the airport, Andrew can distinctly hear the tiny noise of satisfaction coming from Steven. When they pull away, it’s Steven’s turn to look embarrassed.
“You know what? I actually really like it, it’s really rough but…” Steven leans way in, bringing his lips next to Andrew’s ear, the hot breath almost making him shiver. “…that kinda turns me on.”
Before Andrew can formulate any sort of response, Steven’s walking off with the baggage cart. What a tease. Andrew catch up to him with double-wide strides, returning to normal once he’s side-by-side with his man again.
“I didn’t really like it at first either but it’s growing on me.” Andrew pauses for dramatic effect, Steven is already preemptively rolling his eyes because he knows where this is going. “Literally!”
Andrew’s pointing finger guns at a very done Steven, he even pretends to fire a few shots. The taller man lifts one hand off the handle of the cart to slap him on the arm, but he’s chuckling at the pun regardless.
“Not your best work. I give it an 8.”
“Out of 10? That’s a pretty good score.” Andrew wrestles for control of the cart away from Steven, who initially resists but gives up to yawn.
“No, out of a 100. You’re failing miserably.” That’s what he claims but Andrew knows better. The fondness that’s on full display on Steven’s face tells him all he needed to know: he succeeded perfectly.
Closing notes:
Some of you may notice that I actually teased the title in the last prompt fic.
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