#lorne kind of gets around i guess

[trainofcommand]

Flashfic written for @squidgiepdx's Pi-Day Drabble-ish-or-more-athon! (why not head on over there and leave a prompt or some flashfic?); prompt from @goddess47

A question of pie

(Lorne/McKay; T-rated)

Rodney walked into the meeting room, plate in one hand, fork in another, and a mouth full of the most delicious pie he'd had in...well, years probably. "Did you all know," he said, crumbs spilling from his mouth, and he didn't even care, "that Major Lorne makes pie? From scratch? The pastry and everything?"

"Yes, Rodney," Teyla replied, looking vaguely smug.

Well, Rodney figured she had a right to look smug if she'd known about the pie before him.

"Yep," Ronon said, nodding and leaning back against his chair, arms crossed. "Definitely."

Huh. Teyla and Ronon were in the know, apparently, and he shouldn't be surprised. They probably had their fingers in several...well, pies, as it were. People talked to Teyla. And Teyla talked to Ronon. They were their own little information sharing network.

"He makes great pie," Parrish added, maybe looking a little blissful.

What the hell was Parrish doing at this meeting? Oh well, Rodney shrugged it off. He had pie. It was amazing. Parrish had a right to look blissful. Frankly, Rodney was thinking about asking for this pie's hand in marriage or something. He would treat it right. And Major Lorne probably still had more pieces. This pie looked like it was...maybe a 6th of an average pie. It was a very generous slice. Rodney had been delighted when Lorne had handed it over, grinning, and saying, "No citrus came anywhere near it, Rodney."

Major Lorne. Rodney hadn't really ever paid him too much attention, aside from noticing a few key points: Lorne was a little sarcastic, good with a gun, kind of unobtrusive, he had nice dimples when he actually smiled. That kind of thing. Normal stuff.

But this pie. It added a new dimension to Lorne. An interesting dimension.

"Oh," Chuck said, walking into the room, datapad in hand. "Is that one of Major Lorne's pies?"

Rodney nodded, and Teyla, Ronon, and Parrish all hummed, "Mmmmhmm," in unison.

"Huh," Chuck said. "Nice. Lucky you, Rodney."

Yeah. Lucky him indeed. The pie was fantastic, better with every bite. And Lorne had said, "Hey, come by my quarters tonight, if you want some more." Boy, did he ever want some more. He couldn't wait for tonight.

And then Elizabeth and John finally - finally! - joined them in the meeting room, and it was about time, because Rodney was a busy man and he didn't have time to wait around while they futzed with dull logistical discussions or whatever. And also, he had finished his pie, and it was boring sitting around with nothing to distract him.

When the meeting ended - Parrish talked too much about some botanical nonsense, and Chuck took notes, and John kept looking at Rodney's empty plate and kind of smirk-frowning, which Rodney assumed was the way he reacted to not having his own pie - Rodney stood, said, "Not the best use of my time, thanks for that," and picked up the empty plate. He followed Ronon and Teyla out the door, said, "I am still thinking about the pie," and, "I don't even know what kind of fruit he used or what to call it." Mostly he was thinking of it as The Pie, putting it in a singular category, its own classification. It deserved it.

"Oh, Rodney," Teyla said, laughing lightly. "I believe Major Lorne called it his 'huk-up' pie, though I am uncertain what fruit it is."

Huh. He'd never heard of that kind of pie. Then again, he didn't usually bother to learn the names of the Pegasus fruits. Citrus and no-citrus was about as far as he got.

Later - much later - after a long day, and some interesting math, and a kind of boring dinner, and a visit to Major Lorne's quarters for more pie to make up for the dinner, Rodney lay flat on Lorne's bed, sweaty, wrung out, slightly stunned, a little giddy, and thought, oh, and huh, and holy shit, that really was the best pie I've ever had, and also the sex was amazing.

"Hey, Rodney," Lorne said, next to him. Rodney turned his head to the side. Lorne was grinning and he was still naked. So naked. Very, very appealingly naked. And his dimples were great. "You want more pie?"

Hell yes, he did.

[coraniaid]

hater alphabet ask! F!

Obviously my first instinct is to respond with a post about Faith but (I guess thanks to choosing who I follow on here carefully?) I don't think I actually have any unpopular opinions about Faith?

Or rather, I suppose, I know there are lots of takes on Faith I would strongly disagree with -- that she's genuinely cool, that she honestly doesn't care about killing Allan Finch at all, that she spends so long being jealous of Buffy because she really wants to sleep with Xander/Angel/Riley, that she's too "streetwise" to have been won over by the Mayor, that she isn't one of the most interesting and ultimately sympathetic characters on the show -- but I just can't bring myself to believe that any of these positions are actually popular.

So I'm going to talk about Season 5's Family instead.

I think Family is a very good episode -- it's actually one of the Season 5 episodes I've rewatched most -- but I think it would work a lot better (both in its own right and as a metaphor) without it being proved unequivocally at the end that Tara definitely isn't any sort of demon.

Firstly because ... well, I kind of hate the whole magic demon-detecting chip plot to start with -- it's one of the show's worst bits of world-building, I'd argue, and I'm aware that's saying a lot -- but at least most of the time I can tell myself it's something that only affects Spike's brain, using his own knowledge of what he's about to do and who he's about to hurt. Giving it the power to actually detect with perfect accuracy whether Spike is hurting a human or not -- even when he wouldn't know himself -- is a little bit much for me. (And yes, there's at least one other famous example of it doing that, and yes, I really hate that one too.)

But second -- and much more importantly -- isn't the point of everyone rallying around Tara at the end even when they think she might be something strange or monstrous kind of undercut by the script immediately going "oh, nevermind, she's not a demon, she's definitely completely safe and normal"? Doesn't that undermine the metaphor here pretty badly? What exactly is the show trying to say?

What would the Scoobies have done if Spike had hit Tara and it hadn't hurt him? Immediately changed tune and let her biological family drag her away forever? Is the fact her father is obviously a bullying asshole not reason enough to hate him? Does he have to be deliberately lying about Tara's demonic nature too? Can families only be abusive if they are knowingly, consciously dishonest in the justifications they provide for their actions? Is it not enough that Tara really didn't want to go?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying the show should have said flat out that Tara was a demon. I'm not sure whether I'd have liked that either. I just don't think being definitive about it either way adds to the episode. I think it works much better if it's left a little ambiguous.

I do think that Buffy -- and spin-off show Angel especially -- slightly loses its way by having so many demons and vampires become sympathetic as the seasons progress (while never really having Buffy question the fact she kills so many of them), but it is still part of the episode's context and contunity that this is a direction the two shows have both been heading in for a while. Anya is an ex-demon (and will briefly become a demon again) and while this causes some tension it never outright prevents her being welcomed into the group. Her friend and fellow vengeance demon Halfrek is consistently treated as a sympathetic character and not as a monster. Spike and Angel and Harmony are vampires but the two shows have been treating them all as people for a while and will only continue to do so. On Angel, Doyle was part-demon and Cordelia will also become part-demon less than a year after this episode airs. Lorne exists.

I mean, reading this answer over again I'm not sure I've done a great job of articulating why this bothers me (which is part of why I've been so slow in answering this, sorry) but I think this implicit use of 'demon' to mean 'definitely a bad person' just feels weirdly out of place by Season 5. And again, I just go back to the question: what are we supposed to think Buffy and Willow would have done if Spike had unwittingly proved that Tara really wasn't fully human? And if the answer isn't anything different, why is that part of the scene at all?

[dduane]

Messing around in Daz Studio: subverting image files

I was mentioning some days back that there was a missed opportunity in the render below, which is supposed to be located in the Ebooks Direct virtual office...

But that being the case, that tablet really ought to have the (Young Wizards universe's) Apple without a Bite on it.

...So here's how we fix that in Daz Studio.

(Adding a cut here because this what follows is technical stuff of interest only to fellow digital artists, and there's no point in cluttering people's dashes up with it...)

...So, let's open the app and bring up the master Daz (.duf) file involved, with just enough "distant light" turned on for us to see what's going on.

Zoom in on the item we're going to subvert.

Select the texture region that we're going to mess around with.

Using the "surfaces" tab makes it possible to discover the name of the image file(s) this object is using for its color and texture.

Open that file in your preferred image processing app. (This is Corel Photo-Paint, which I mostly use for everything that doesn't require Adobe Photoshop.)

Here's the file that Daz wraps around the physical "tablet" object.

...Now it's just a matter of adding the art that I want to have appear on the tablet: meaning the Apple without a Bite. This needs to be a .png file with a transparent background... though what I've got right now is just a black and white .jpg.

...So I'll use Corel's "magic wand" masking tool to cut out the white part of that image, paste it into a new empty file/window, and save it as the right kind of .png.

...Now I can apply this to the area of the image that wraps around the tablet object. The exciting part, as usual, is figuring out where on the wraparound image it ought to go. In this case, it took a few wrong guesses. (Which is par for the course...) I also grayed the apple out, to make it work better with the rest of the scene, and with the surface of the tablet.

Then I loaded that file into the same directory where the original lives, but with a different filename to make it plain what I've done to it. And when I brought up the view of the scene in the main window...

Sorted. ...Ish. Because the way the tablet's being held means that the Apple looks a little misplaced, even though it's truly not. I'm going to have to get in under the hood again and tweak either the way Lorn's holding it, or the wraparound texture file itself, for this one version of the render, to make it look right. (eyeroll)

Additionally, every object has (or should have) two other files associated with it that help give the illusion of actual physical existence: a bump map (or displacement map) file and a normal map file. (You can see what they both look like in this online file creator.) If that apple was meant to be anything but almost completely flat against the back of the tablet, I'd need to create new bump and normal files for the object to make sure the illusion of three-dimensionality wasn't broken. But that's not a problem here.

So now back to work! And thanks for your interest. :)

[enigmatist17]

My Sanctuary (Part 4)

Part 1 2 3

--

Spike finds that he really likes Caritas.

No, he's not a fan of the singing portion when it comes to himself, but it's nice to find a joint that doesn't mind a vampire nursing a drink in the corner. He found a table with a decent view of the stage, but enough out of the way to avoid the eyes of whoever was singing onstage. Lorne would swing by every so often, sometimes asking if he wanted to sing, other times just making idle chitchat until he was inevitably called away. The green demon even encouraged Spike to start writing after catching Spike writing scraps of poetry on random receipts he likely swiped from random tables, only giving a small smile whenever the vampire questioned how he knew of his old habit.

The free blood was a bonus.

Tonight was a bit of a slow one, the currently singing chaos demon singing a mellow song as patrons relaxed in the sanctuary. It was the kind of night that was warm in just the right way, work and the real world a distant reminder in favor of drinks and singing. Spike was at his normal table, a journal he had picked up a few days back open and being written in as Spike tried his best to make some sort of poem that didn't sound like the ramblings of a madman.

Sadly, it did, but he'd get better eventually.

"How goes it?" Lorne hummed as he appeared across the table, the vampire barely reacting as he finished a stanza.

"Not my best work, too much screamin' tonight." He muttered, scratching out the last few words with a scowl.

"It'll pass lemon drop; they always do." Lorne smiled, the vampire glancing up with a soft expression before grumbling and looking back at his work. "Oh, but I do have a surprise for you."

"Oh?"

"Mhm, the very underage surprise is standing at my bar." Blue eyes snap up, looking past Lorne and at the curved bar near the stairs until he lands on a familiar figure clutching a backpack close as she scans the crowd.

"Dawn?" For a moment, all Spike does is stare, a wave of protectiveness soon sending him across the room when some random vampire looks at the teen with interest. The teen finds herself suddenly yanked away and behind a familiar figure, the snarl Spike sends at a vampire she hadn't even seen sending their hands up.

"Whoa, I didn't see she was taken, sorry man!" The other vampire quickly decides that being across the room is their best bet at staying alive, and Dawn has a chance to exhale before Spike rounds on her with wide eyes.

"What are you doing here pet?"

"I came here to find you." If he had been human, Dawn was pretty sure Spike would have had a heart attack the way he stared, eyes wide as saucers.

"And find him you did, sweetheart." A green demon in a red suit made Dawn jump, the man bowing with a small smile. "Welcome to Caritas. You can call me The Host or Lorne."

"Um, thank you." She gave a nervous smile in return, looking around the karaoke bar. "It's funny, I heard this was a good place to get help, and I guess it is."

"I'm glad I could help then, huh?" the demon chuckled, snapping his fingers at the bartender. "If you could, dear, she looks like she could use a good smoothie and maybe something to eat."

"Right away." The bartender nodded before moving to the other side of the bar, Spike finally feeling safe enough to shift back to his human face now they were alone. "Spike, why don't you dolls get set up at your table, and I'll drop by soon."

"Right..." Dawn feels her hand being taken as Spike herds her to his table, the vampire muttering under his breath as he steals a seat from a nearby table for her. "Sit." For once, Dawn listens, watching the barely blonde pace back and forth for a moment before resuming his own seat, finally focusing his attention on her.

"Your hair is curly." It's the first thing Dawn blurts out, setting her bag on the table with a small smile, biting her lip when Spike flinched at her sudden comment. "I like it."

"...thanks?" Keeping up his regimen had been taxing on the best of days, so he'd just kept dying the tips of his hair the best he could, wanting something of who he'd built himself to be still visible.

To keep William safe and tucked inside.

"I missed you." Those eyes focus on her, wracked with so much guilt and pain Dawn nearly lets out a gasp, having never seen so much raw emotion from him before. "Spike...?"

"I didn't mean to be away so long..." The vampire ducks his head, looking at his lap with a hiss. "Made the girl upset, so upset, bad William, bad bad bad -"

"Enough of that, sweetcheeks." Lorne's hand on Spike's shoulder stopped his mumbles; Dawn was confused as she looked at Lorne for some sort of answer. "Sorry, sweetie. When his soul acts up like this, it's best to try and nip it in the bud or ride it out."

"He has a soul?" Her question is a whisper as the demon looks at her in surprise, Spike silent as he looks at the table. Lorne just gives her a sympathetic look before going to grab her drink and food, and besides the partons singing on stage, neither of them says a word as she eats. Dawn wasn't as surprised as she should have been, she thought as she drank the best smoothie she'd ever had, knowing that he had gone for what he thought was best for her.

"Did you come alone?" Spike closed the book that was in front of him as he took in her appearance, able to smell dozens of strangers and cheap polyester from what was most likely a bus ride hanging around the teen.

"I got on a bus, I have time before anyone notices." Dawn fiddled with the zipper to her bag as she watched the various demons mill around the room. "I couldn't wait any longer, I had to see that you were okay."

"You could 'ave been hurt." Slipping off his chair, Spike puts his journal in Angel's borrowed coat pocket before offering a hand to Dawn. "Come pet."

"Are we going to Angel's place?" She slipped her backpack on before taking his hand, her grip a little bit tighter than usual. They bid Lorne goodbye before going up to street level and emerging in the parking lot.

"Yes, you'll be safe there." His voice is soft as they start walking, and some vampires who had been just hanging out by the street scatter when Spike snarled their way.

"But I'm always safe with you." Dawn sticks close to Spike's side as they walk through L.A.'s nightlife crowd, a little in awe of how lively it was compared to home. No one seemed to care about demons walking amongst humans here, a small crowd of human and demon kids playing with chalk in front of a 24-hour convenience store as Spike directs her across the street with a slight tug.

"No, not right now," He muttered, taking his familiar route back to the Hyperion. "Too many screams, could lose you in the crowd, could lose you to them, and I can't let it happen."

"Lose me to who?" Spike jerks his head toward her as they stop in the middle of the sidewalk, and she can see the guilt again. "I'm not going anywhere..."

"How do I know this?" Dawn gently pulls Spike out of the way of the foot traffic, the two sitting on a bench that had seen better days.

"Because you taught me how to fight and be strong, the voices aren't going to have it that easy, not one bit." She squeezed his hand with a teary smile, and he reached over with his free hand to gently cup her face. "I'm happy you're okay, we haven't heard from you and I was so scared..."

"I wanted to come back when I was whole, not missing with bits that can't be seen, blood and screams where you deserve songs and flowers." Spike sighed as he ran his thumb across her cheek. "The bad boy doesn't deserve to come home, not yet pet."

"You're not a bad boy." Dawn moved close so she could hug the vampire as tight as she could, Spike moving his arm so it rested across her back. "Please come home, please?" She can feel Spike inhale and then sigh, for her sake she realizes with a choked sob, and then move so he can slide his other arm under her legs.

"Come on, let's go." He let her adjust before continuing his journey, the hotel soon within view, and luckily conflict-free as he headed for the lobby.

"Hey Spike, welc—Dawn?" Cordelia's surprised voice gathered the teen's attention, and she waved from her spot in Spike's arms.

"Hey Cordelia, you look good." The former classmate of her sister laughed as she was joined by a man and woman Dawn had never seen before, both curious as they took in the girl in Spike's arms.

"Gunn, Fred, this is Dawn Summers." The three of them emerge from behind the massive former check-in desk as Spike sets Dawn down, the teen straightening her clothes before taking his hand back.

"Hi!" She flashed a slightly shy smile as Fred offered her hand with a matching one.

"I'm Fred, Fred Burkle if you want my last name." The Texan shook her hand before withdrawing with an awkward bounce. "Nice ta meet ya!"

"Same here, Charles but everyone calls me Gunn." His handshake is more relaxed, leaving Dawn grinning a bit as she takes them in.

"It's awesome to see you guys have extra hands, having only three people battle demons and stuff all the time has to be taxing. Speaking of, where is Wesley?"

"He and Angel are sharpening some of the blades in the basement, the nerds." Gunn rolled his eyes, motioning behind him. "Want to come?"

"Yes please." Dawn nodded and squeezed Spike's hand, the vampire shrugging and following after as the group headed down some stairs to a massive basement. They hear some laughter over the noises of a grinding stone, Wesley watching Angel pantomime some past fight as he sharpened the sword in his hands, the vampire "stabbing" some foe before acting out a dramatic death to the point where he fell to the floor.

"Bravo bravo!" Dawn laughed; Angel quickly sat up as Wesley nearly lost his hold on his weapon, the stone slowing to a stop as she laughed with the other three surrounding her. "Encore!"

"Uh, hey Dawn." Angel gave an awkward wave, glad he couldn't blush as the teen wormed her way past Fred to give him a hug. "When did you get into L.A?"

"Uh, an hour ago? I was supposed to get here sooner, but the bus had to stop for gas, and then I had to find the bar someone suggested I use, but I'm here now!" She pulled back from the hug to wave at Wesley, noting the Watcher was right beside Angel. "Hey Wesley."

"Dawn." He tipped his head, not really having too many memories of the younger Summers. "Glad you got here unscathed."

"Well, I am for now, but I'm in for a hell of a reckoning when I get home." She winced, looking back to see Spike giving her a slightly disapproving look.

"Hey, you hate the waiting game, I get it." Cordelia hummed, tucking some hair behind her ear. "C'mon, let's go pick out a room for you, because you're not going anywhere tonight, unless Giles is going to come get you in that crappy car of his."

"Oh, he got a new one. It's red and not about to rust apart." Dawn giggled. The two headed up arm in arm as everyone else watched their retreating back in amusement.

---

Dawn ended up sleeping in Spike's room, the teen quietly snoring while Spike cradled her sleeping form. She and the investigations crew had stayed up most of the night before trading stories, the adults concerned no one had called when morning came, but figured someone would after she'd fallen asleep.

The two of them had shared tears after closing the door to his suite, Dawn hugging Spike so hard she was worried about breaking him as she sobbed. As much as it had been nice to have the others always around, becoming a small village to help raise and care for Dawn, he was the only one who'd truly made her feel safe. Spike hadn't been expecting to cry himself at the sound of her sobs, his initial panic fading as he realized he'd missed the little Bit as well, something he never thought could happen.

He missed this little firebrand of a human, missed her so much he almost drowned until they both fell exhausted.

It was now two days later, and despite his misgivings, surely the Scoobies should have noticed Dawn was gone by now. He slowly untangled himself from her scrawny limbs and went for her backpack that had been tossed on the coffee table when they'd first come up, figuring it had been long enough. The first thing he saw when he opened it was familiar leather, the sight making him smile for the first time in ages. His quest for a cell phone was forgotten as he pulled his duster out and gave it a once-over, rubbing his thumbs over his second skin before slipping it on. After reveling in his duster's familiar weight and smell, Spike returned to his task as he fished out her red phone with a slight shake of his head. He debates who to call first, and decides that Giles would be the better figure, sitting on the couch as the phone rings.

"Dawn?!" Spike blinked at the voice he hadn't expected, hearing some sort of scratching in the background.

"It's Spike." He can hear a sharp intake of breath before the noise pauses, the connection too weak for Spike to pick up anything. "What you doin' answerin' the Watcher's cell warlock?"

"Is Dawn safe?" Ethan's voice was trembling with barely concealed rage, something twisting in the pit of Spike's gut as he sat up straight.

"She's fine, what's wrong?" Ethan is about to respond when he hears a scream, a proper scream of rage that sounds like it is coming from a certain Watcher in the background. "What's wrong warlock?!"

"Spike?" Dawn's sleepy voice caught his attention, the teen sitting up as she rubbed her eye. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know pet, I -"

"Buffy was brought back."

The world goes silent as the words ring in Spike's head, chest rising and falling as he tries to process what he's been told. He can feel Dawn come to him, take the phone from his hand, and step away, only to start crying a few moments later.

After her first sob, the poor coffee table is flung across the suite along with her bag, followed by the couch and soon a random chair, as Spike lets out a roar of...of...he doesn't know what feeling is trying to win out, but he screams it out all the same. He stops flinging furniture when Angel grabs his hands from seemingly nowhere, falling to the floor like a cut marionette as he just screams, vision blurred by tears as his sire holds him. Someone is talking to Dawn as Spike works on focusing his breathing, rage suddenly boiling from under the surface as he comes to mind who would be bloody stupid enough to raise the dead. Angel nearly loses his grip as Spike tries to jerk after more furniture, sending them both crashing to the ground.

"That stupid bloody fucking witch!" He snarls, trying to wrench his way out of the iron grip his sire had on him after Angel had pinned him down with no success. "Magic ALWAYS HAS CONSEQUENCES!"

"Spike you have to calm down!" Cordelia knelt within his view, afraid to touch the vampire for fear of being bitten.

"Let him get it out." Angel snapped, anger coloring his own words as he kept Spike from injuring himself or others as he screamed in Fyral. "Get Dawn out of here, now." Dawn resisted being dragged out of the room, screaming as Gunn hoisted her up and over his shoulder, hitting him as hard as she could as she tried to go back to Spike to no avail. By the time they've made it a floor down is when the sobs start back up, pressing her face into Gunn's sweatshirt as she lets out ugly noises of pain, the fight completely gone by the time they've brought her to their offices on the lower level.

They can hear Spike's muffled screams as the vampire tries to fight free of his grandsire.

"Two days, and not a single person thought to call her sister?" Wesley was aghast as he spoke into her phone, the former Watcher nigh on murderous.

"Rupert and I had been summoned to a Council meeting, and we only returned a few hours ago!" Ethan was angry, yet his tone was laced with heartache at all the screaming he'd heard on the other end of the phone. We would have stopped her, believe you me. This magic is dangerous and unpredictable, the foolish girl!"

"Is...how is Buffy?" The name sounded wrong coming out of his mouth, and everyone was silent except Dawn, who continued to sob as she clung to Gunn.

"...she came back human, if that was your question."

"Ah..."

There wasn't much else to say.

"When we...calm Spike, we will figure out travel accommodations." Wesley cleared his throat, uncomfortable with the idea of sending Spike back so early. "I don't think we could convince him to stay."

"Likely not." Ethan agreed, and the angry shouting on his end finally went silent. "We've got her at Ripp-Giles's place."

"Understood." With a click, the call was over. Dawn looked up from her spot on the floor after pulling away from Gunn.

She was so bloody small.

"What now?" She looked at him for an answer Wesley didn't have, and the Brit looked at her with a soft expression as he knelt in front of her.

"Once Spike has calmed down, we'll figure it out, but do you need anything for now?"

"I could use some water." Dawn replied with a quiet sigh, hugging her legs close as Fred went to grab a bottle for her. Cordelia sat beside the smaller girl just as Fred returns, slipping an arm around her shoulders as Dawn drained the bottle without a sound.

"What happened?" Her voice has a bit of a tremble to it as Dawn looks up at Wesley, who was decidedly avoiding her gaze. "I heard you talking, b-but I didn't catch much of it."

"I—" The man removed his glasses with a whispered curse no one caught, and Dawn idly wonders if he'd start cleaning them like Giles does. "Willow did a very powerful and very dark resurrection spell the night Giles, Ethan, and you left. I'm assuming you chose that night because you'd have been caught otherwise."

"Yea, the Council called them away and I just...slipped out." Dawn fiddled with the plastic in her hands, looking at the floor now. "I didn't know what they had planned, honest!"

"We know sweetie." Cordy gave her a small squeeze. "Even before I graduated, Willow was starting to get more brazen with her magic, but this? I have no words."

"Trust me, Spike is saying them all for you." Gunn frowned. I may not know a whole lot about magic, but even I know there's always a price to pay for everything."

"It might be a good idea to send Angel back with Spike and Dawn," Wesly sighed, placing his glasses back on. "Aside from obvious reasons, extra hands might be useful if there is some sort of blowback from her spell. Also, he has a car."

"Um, I hate to rain on your parade and everythin', but is it wise to send Spike back to Sunnydale?" Fred picked at one of her nails when everyone glanced over. "He's not exactly Mr. Basket Full of Marbles."

"I'm not going back without him." Dawn shook her head, looking up at the now silent hotel above them. "I can't."

"You heard the lady, sounds like a plan." Cordelia shrugged, the rest of the Investigations crew exchanging glances.

None of them were stupid enough to get between the Slayer of Slayers and the current Slayer's sister.

[buggerthis]

can you elaborate on what you perceive as male characters angel and spike being into 🙏 I want to hear your thoughts

of course tumblr user urbanlegends

i’m guessing u mean what they’re attracted to in which case…..

generally i think all vamps ever just don’t have any gender preference or anything because that’s. a human thing . and they’re not humans.. but still

spike: he def has some kind of . well. inferiority complex thing going on…. i mean….. cecily.. dru.. buffy.. all people he thinks are better than him (even if he doesn’t outwardly say it i mean. look at how he worships dru and then buffy and is so intimidated by cecily) and on the gay side we got angel which is the same thing except he tries not to let it get to him (perhaps bc he’s known him for so long too.. he got more pushed around as william still . and thus begins the Endless Arguments they have) but also we all saw what he rly thought in that s5 fight . at the same time when he’s shown compassion and understanding (anya) he seems to really be at peace with that.. idk i remember being like damn guys if u keep being nice to him we will just like . not be so fucked up . like taming a stray cat . it’s very interesting that spike is supposed to be the opposite of angel and Should just be into anything that moves but he’s very. not like that . he seems to develop crushes from a distance and it kinda consumes him lol??

angel: ohhh my demisexual king. i fr think he gets attached to people he’s known for a while and then is like :] wait i like you . ex. cordelia.. wesley even. one reason bangel didn’t work out is bc he got a crush after like 100 years of not talking to a woman ever and that made him die a little . i find the awkwardness very endearing but ik a lot of people are like girl :| . esp after being with darla for like.. ever.. which is why the mini romances in ats never worked/felt weird and irked me so much (gwen, eve, nina etc) i think wesley/angel is such a real ship….. like they r just there existing gayly and ambiguously . people who don’t watch ats ur missing out

edit: ohhhh they meant what male characters they’re into . LMFAO okay so me personally . in ats i ship everyone in angel investigations together.. as a poly thing.. bc they’re cute . however on their own they don’t rly work sometimes ? like i don’t think gunn and angel could work but they work in the group dynamic . the only guys i see angel really being into are like.. lindsey.. spike.. lorne kinda joking kinda not . i ship him and xander as crack if that counts.. i won’t lie buffyverse kinda fails at giving us Multiple males that have continuous chemistry . if anything we get one or two (lindsey. spike) and the attachment is there for Ever . also i forgot kate as a minor love interest for angel bc she sucks balls that’s how forgettable she is 🙏 LOL

and with spike…. that is mostly just angel and xander . andrew if you wanna be silly asf. maybe giles if you want to be a little bit crazy.. anyway where is spangel hand hold i need to see spangel hand hold

i found him. spangel hand hold

[idiotlovesongs]

The Letters pt. 3

Dear Will,

This week was our first week of high school without you. El told me that you guys started last week. She said things were going well. I’m happy she’s made friends. Have you? I know you said you didn’t want to play D&D without me us, but don’t make yourself miserable. You can join another party if you change your mind. 

Does Lenora’s high school suck as much as Hawkins’? Hawkins’ high school isn’t much different from middle school. It’s all the same faces. People are ignoring us for the most part now, which is nice I guess.

I kept turning around expecting you to be there. It’s different from when you disappeared. Before, I could at least see you in the halls. I could remember your old routes to class, where we would eat lunch, and where we would hang out afterward. Now, you’re not here at all. There’s no trace of you. 

My classes are fine. They seem easy enough. Definitely, no one like Ms. Lorn. Do you remember all the shit she put us through? We were in middle school for fucks sake. Why did she think an essay every Friday was okay? I think I would have to drop out if she followed me here. Especially now that I don’t have you to help me get through her class.

They have a writing club here that I’m not sure about joining. I’ve only seen girls interested in it. It would be kind of weird if I was the only guy there, right?  And El probably wouldn’t like it. I mean, what kind of girl would like her boyfriend surrounded by other girls. It would be cool to start writing like that again though. Maybe I will join.

Lucas is trying out for the basketball team. I don’t know enough about basketball to tell you whether he’s going to make it, but I hope he does. He’s not taking his breakup with Max super well. He gets that she needs space, but he really misses her. Lucas says he’s fine just being friends with her, but I’m not sure he means it. I think he’s just taking what he can get for now.

I miss her too, surprisingly. Never realized how much we talked until we stopped. I’m kind of worried about her. She doesn’t want to hang out with us and got angry when we tried to visit her. It seems like she doesn’t leave her place much. We only see her at school. I’d try talking to her, but I’d rather not get chewed out in public. She’s seriously harsh.

Dustin’s fine I think. He only ever talks about Suzie these days. If this is how annoying I was when El and I got together, I’m so fucking sorry. At least I never called El Elliepoo (I think I just threw up in my mouth at the thought). They seem happy. I’m just glad Suzie is a real person. Can you imagine how awkward it would be if she wasn’t? Not that I don’t have faith in Dustin’s ability to get a girl. She’s kind of demanding. I’m sure you could imagine considering Dustin had to sing to her for her to save the fucking world. Seriously, they were singing while we were trying to escape the you-know-what? 

Sorry. You probably don’t want to think about that. I mean, that’s why you guys left, right? It’s a little hard not to think about it here. It feels like Dustin and Lucas could move on so much easier. Max and I Max is taking it harder because of her brother, obviously. Nancy is busy with college stuff. I think that’s how she’s getting through this. She just buries herself in work. Is Jonathan doing any better? Nancy doesn’t really talk about him that much anymore. Not that she talked about him a lot before, but it feels kind of different. Don’t tell Jonathan I said that.

Are you doing any better? We don’t have to talk about this stuff.

I’ll see you guys this Thanksgiving. Isn’t that cool? It sucks that you guys won’t be able to be here this Christmas. Guess I’ll just have to buy your guys' presents really early and bring them when I come. Promise you won’t open them before it’s time? It’s only fair that way. I heard California doesn’t really get snow. Won’t it be weird to not have snow for Christmas? Maybe I’ll send you some to spread the Christmas joy. 

Is California cool at least? I heard it was more accepting. Lots of different people, you know? Have you met anyone cooler than us yet? No, right? For my sake, just say no. You can hang out with all your rad art friends after lying to me. 

Is Ms. Byers letting you leave the house alone again? You haven’t had any more visions and you’re out of Hawkins so there’s no reason for her not to. Find some cool spots so you can show me them when I visit.

I guess I’ll leave you to whatever you were doing before. See you in November.

Sincerely, Love, Your friend, From, Mike

pt. 1, pt. 2, pt. 4, pt. 5

[burymeinwillow]

My sister and I watched some Ponderosa episodes a couple of years ago and it’s insane! Liberties are definitely take with the backstory (like the house not being even built yet when the show starts even though Joe was said to have been born in it in an episode of Bonanza for example.)

Between this and season one Ben has a hilarious character arc. In one of the Ponderosa episodes Adam wants to get a gun and Ben is firmly opposed, then in season one of Bonanza Ben is very gung-ho about violence, threatening to shoot trespassers multiple times, then for the rest of the series he’s a mostly reasonable community driven man. Ten outta ten guys, super consistent characterization.

Right??? Joe said himself in the OG show he was born in the house, and in the episode Marie, My love, it's descriped that Marie died in a horse accident in front of the house (when Joe was around 6 I believe, he also said he didn't remember anything about her) but in Ponderosa she dies IN AN EXPLOSION that was meant for Ben (?) AND this happens when Joe is 12.

Also how Hoss got his nickname Hoss, I think it's fun they actually make episodes about this to sorta "explain it" but I think I remember the reason they call him Hoss in the OG show is simply because he's so big (?) while in the Ponderosa show Hoss gets his nickname from being bitten in the butt by Joe's horse Paint/Cochise (In the show they name the horse Paint so idk if it's the same black and white paint that Joe has in the OG show)

That said though, I think it's a silly sweet show. I guess I view it as a "alternate universe" tihi

I believe the reason they changed things so drastically from season one is because Lorne Greene simply didn't like how they had written Ben. He wanted Ben to be more welcoming and kind, and I BELIEVE he said if they didn't change it, he would leave the show (don't credit me on that tho)

[redrawthecolorlessworld]

((not really) poorly) explaining rhymix characters' backstories (part 2)

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

———

1. Snow

she was born with a mysterious immunity to snow. that's all i have for her lmao.

2. Miaya

created by amazing mighty around the time felys got kidnapped by a Mysterious Person™. mighty felt lonely and misses felys, and then ended up creating miaya to make him feel less lonely. ended up seeing her as his own kid which is nice :) miaya doesn't really see him as her own father by this point tho :( she also has dreams of meeting someone in the past........she just couldn't remember who it was.

3. Upshift

nothing too special about him. he's just some dj living life normally.

4. Lorn

i haven't come up with anything for her yet :/

5. Ray

was like ether strike back then—blinded by light. eventually cut herself off of it and swore to herself that she'll not be so naive and stubborn anymore. also met strike when he nearly died from being. you fucking guessed it. blinded by light. yippee

6. Lady

literally just axium's backstory but in her pov. she ends up really hating axium for dragging her into his stupid exhibition to the vicious labyrinth and just. Really wants to hurt someone and let out her frustrations on them.

7. Stasis

nothing much for him. before main story happened he tried saving his home nation from being colorless (not the character) forever with some others. that's all.

8. DRG

haven't come up with anything for her yet :(

9. Alxaid

he had some kind of illness where once he dies, everyone he has known will forget about him. he just disappears just like that. was friends with abstruse and hung out with him a lot. he even spent his final moments with abstruse :( by the time main story started he's already long gone :(( rip...........

(...but, would he ever come back? the dead can't go back to the living, you know. unless a case similar to lumine's were to happen—i'll stop now.)

10. Ionostream

a telegraphist (THAT'S NOT AN ACTUAL WORD????? OR DID I TYPED THAT WRONG-) from years ago who accidentally time traveled to the present day and now has to adjust to living in the current resonation (the rhymix nation based off of resonark i guess???). she's...trying her best lol.

11. Aleph-0

he was so fucking smart that he graduated high school early 💀💀💀💀 (probs before the second semester of his first school year there—he managed to meet mantis in that short time tho) he has really REALLY high curiosity with this thing called Temptation™ and then made it his life goal to hunt down its true meaning. he keeps getting himself in near death experiences in the process tho. so self sacrificial.....and all for knowledge too......

12. Mantis

is an assassin of sorts i guess. met larva, falls in love with her, but then got told that she was his next target, and then killed her (with a heavy heart). made a promise to himself to come find her again one day if she were to come back, and then years later reunites with her..........except it's not a her anymore it's a him now. hashtag sort of transgenderism??????????

13. Astra Walkthrough

idk yet.

14. World Fragments III

literally her name. in a sense she's sort of like primeval???? she's like. a result from a bunch of actual world fragments in rhymix put together to become one. lol.

15. Chronicle

idk yet either :/

16. Hikaru

he got a WHOLE ASS BACKSTORY POST ALL TO HIMSELF ON MY OLD ART BLOG AND I'M TOO LAZY TO LINK IT HERE BUT BASICALLY- was a famous idol who had loads of fans but had a really creepy stalker who went to the same school as him. initially she kept sending him letters with the sign off name being just "T", but then it gets worse and worse and eventually hikaru found out she was stalking him all this time. eventually gets murdered by her in some way and then becomes a god. WOO. THAT'S A LOT.

17. ultradiaxon-N3

was created by momento and arghena solely as compensation for the bullshit that happened during one of memoria's many april fools events. now is the nation's trustworthy AI :3 she would not steal art and writing btw

18. Hivemind

can't think of one for him yet ughhhhh

19. Hivemind Interlinked

an alternate version of hivemind who accidentally time traveled to the future. ends up just living through it normally lol. also ended up time travelling AND universe hopping to current day rhymix for one of memoria's april fools events (and accidentally meets his past self in the process).

20. Felys

was some kind of musician who's also really good with classical instruments like the violin and the piano. got really famous for that too. met mighty, fell in love with him, feelings got returned, and then bam they're lovers now. uhhhhh also got married to that fuckass god but then days later got kidnapped and locked up in some prison realm away from rhymix by an Unknown Person™.

21. Cybernetic Vampire

vampires in rhymix are rare. the few ones who were alive were then taken down (aka literally killed) by the humans to prevent anything bad happening to the humans. cybervamp is one of the last few vampires in rhymix and really does fear extinction :(

22. Chronomia

she's just a gal who likes clocks. she's fine.

23. Perfect

oh boy. honestly idk how to explain it in a post like this when i could just make a whole different post about it, but to sum it up quickly:

parents dead -> lives alone and overtime develops severe depression for a reason i haven't decided on yet -> got found by a group of people in her lowest moment -> got taken in by them -> eventually gets abused and changed in horrible ways possible to make her into a "perfect human being" -> gets traumatized -> eventually runs away with some other kids in the science lab place because she's experimented on in the same place as terabyte, satellite, and opia -> lives independently now

....ok moving on.

24. Destr0yer

explained in her introductory post, but basically she was the previous goddess of destruction before destonio came in and took that role. she had the same desires he did; destroy the world. got stopped by amazing mighty in the process and then got "fired from her job", as she likes to describe it LMAOOOOOOO

25. Credits

was basically unnoticed by the people around him for his whole life, got sick of that, and then took up the role of becoming a tv program host. his fame skyrocketed because he's just That good at this job and good looking. the fame got into his head tho, and then he suddenly became kinda greedy, eventually appearing in a lot more tv programs across different channels. capitalism sucks lol

ALRIGHT I'M DONE FOR NOW. SEE YOU ALL IN PART 3 LMAO

[gerhardtz]

20 Questions for Writers

OKAY so Tumblr decided to start blasting Line of Duty posts onto my dash again and I saw @ac12bookworminthetardis do this tag (I have no idea how long ago, apologies if I'm tagging you over something ancient) and wanted to give it a go ^__^

I know we don't know each other, apologies if me tagging you like this is weird !!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 11 public, two hidden (awaiting rewrites to make public again)

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 24,985, as of this post

3. What fandoms do you write for? Mostly Fargo! In fact, almost exclusively Fargo these days. I haven't written for another fandom in years. I've considered returning to writing Doctor Who fic, though. Maybe LoD if I end up hyperfixating again.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Dazed & Confused (96 | Doctor Who) When The Clock Struck Thirteen (23 | Doctor Who) One Hour Ahead of the Possee (9 | Fargo) Dead Boys (6 | Fargo) A Promise Made In Blood (6 | Fargo)

5. Do you respond to comments? Always! They always make my day, and I try my best to respond to them with as much insight as possible ^__^

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? It's not complete yet, but Drop It, Doe Eyes is definitely going to have the saddest ending. Sorry JethRye enjoyers. It's rough.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Dazed & Confused, I suppose, though it was only a oneshot drabble from back in the day. As for my current WIPs, I think One Hour Ahead of the Possee will be the happiest. I've kind of accepted that it's a fix-it fic at this point LOLLLL

8. Do you get hate on fics? Nope! And I thankfully never have.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yepppp I sure do. I haven't published any of it (yet) but it will definitely be included in my JethRye fic, and probably a fair few future oneshots. Though most of the smut I've written as of late has been for my OC stories rather than fics.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Yes! @pastelspindash and I are slowly working through a Fargo x Sonic crossover AU which we are taking WAY too seriously lmao.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Not yet, but I will with the FargoxSonic crossover.

14. What’s your all time favourite ship? ALL TIME FAVOURITE??? I couldn't choose one. Genuinely. Here are some of my favourites though! Lester Nygaard/Lorne Malvo (Fargo) Peggy Blumquist/Constance Heck (Fargo) Steve Arnott/Dot Cottan (Line of Duty) The Doctor/Jack Harkness (Doctor Who) Cal Lightman/Gillian Foster (Lie to Me)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Ughhh my Xenoblade Chronicles AU, Lone Homs. It's been hidden for a while now because I changed a lot about my OC after writing the first few chapters, and then never ended up rewriting it. I haven't cared about Xenoblade in years now so I doubt I'll get around to it :/

16. What are your writing strengths? I think probably dialogue, especially capturing characters' voices. I've had people tell me a few times that I'm quite good at it -- especially in Fargo fics ^__^

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Well first of all I NEVER WRITE ANYTHINGGGG I'm so slow! Writing is so hard!!!! And second of all I'm not great at descriptions unless I really put my soul into it. I'm a screenwriter first and foremost, so prose is hard for me.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I'm not proficient enough in a language right now to be able to do that T__T

19. First fandom you wrote for? I don't have it in me to admit that!!! It was back in 2016 and I'm taking it to the grave. You can try to guess if you want.

Let's just pretend my first fic was when I started writing Doctor Who fic back in 2019.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Hmmmm. Either One Hour Ahead of the Possee, or Dead Boys. The first has just been super fun to write and I'm proud of the prose. The second I'm SUPER proud of how I juggled so many characters in one scene ^__^

[steveskafte]

THINK YOU'RE BETTER I was born to be a country boy, but I never quite fit in with the rednecks. Not that anyone could agree on the definition of what that was when I was growing up. Everyone in the towns said it was anyone on the outskirts, and kids like me just pushed that label further up the North Mountain. I knew a boy in Mount Rose who made sure that no one thought he was from the neighbouring fishing village of Port Lorne. They were his rednecks, as he was to us. Somewhere down the line, "redneck" seemed to change from being an insult to more like a badge of honour – at least for some. I guess that modern country music had a lot to do with that, rollicking anthems of the trucks/jeans/beer/boots/boobs crowd. Still, best not to go around telling folks in the local pub that's what they are. There's a certain subset of country folks who think that everyone is out to look down on them. It's impossible to argue with the mindset, to convince them that wanting better for yourself doesn't mean you think you're better than them. One time, a woman got offended when someone complimented my spelling and grammar. The standards I had for my writing were a threat to the ones she didn't have for hers. Once, I wrote my memories of an old rundown trailer park, and heard from a sea of angry residents who would've preferred a glowing tribute. To them, anyone who didn't extol the virtues of mobile home living was clearly a hater. I've always been driven by a kind of aggressive positivity, the sort that assumes the best of anyone, and will happily drown a bitter attitude with the greater joys of existing. Part of that passion is always learning, and even though I've been accused of being over-educated (I'm under, at best), my work is just a process of absorbing and expressing. You can't help getting better at doing what you do all the time. Reactionary exclusion is much the same. I see a lot of handmade signs in the backwoods, on doors and in dooryards, railing against a certain system of beliefs or politics. Modern version of "We don't like your kind around here." I try my best to tell those very same folks that I like their kind just fine. It's not so different from mine. April 12, 2024 Round Hill, Nova Scotia Year 17, Day 5997 of my daily journal.

[trainofcommand]

Princess princess au????

Ahhh, thanks for asking!!

This is about 1200 words so far, and I feel like I might finish it someday. Anyway, it's Lorne/Sheppard on Atlantis, pretty much the Atlantis we know, except that they're slip-sliding around each other, hooking up occasionally. And one day, Lorne sarcastically calls Sheppard 'princess' (in a reasonable context) and realizes that it makes Sheppard blush, hard.

It's like. Wholesome kink discovery or something? Lorne giving Sheppard something he wants, but can't/won't ask for.

Anyway, there are no actual princesses involved.

A snippet, below.

The first time he says it, it's a joke, something to try and lessen the tension, to distract Sheppard from the pain and the shitshow of a mission that had fallen apart around them. He's half-holding Sheppard up, half-dragging him through the gate, and he says, as they step into Atlantis, "I guess you're gonna be spending a few days in the infirmary, sir. Lying around like a princess, waited on, hand and foot." And Sheppard kind of stumbles at the words, his breath catching. Evan figures it's the pain, the bloodloss, the probable dehydration, and is glad to see stretchers waiting for them, is glad to hand Sheppard off, and watch him be rolled away, fast and efficient.

It isn't until later - after a shower, a meal, a debrief with Dr. Weir - that Evan remembers something else. Sheppard had stumbled, his breath had hitched, and his cheeks, even under the dirt and dried blood, had flushed, bright red, hot spots of flared colour.

And it makes him think.

He thinks about it when he stops by the infirmary to check on Sheppard's progress.

He thinks about it when he gets updates from Beckett, and sorts out rosters, and reassures Dr. Weir that there'll be no repercussions from the mission, that they'd taken care of it.

...[some filler stuff that needs to be fleshed out]

A week later, Sheppard is out of the infirmary and walking around the city like he'd never been injured, and it's enough, almost enough, to fool most people. Not Evan though. But he's good at keeping up the pretense, pretending like he doesn't see the way Sheppard's eyes crease with pain when he gets up from a chair, or how it takes him a moment to start walking, like he has to think about it and think around it before he can fall into a familiar gait.

Evan watches, and he thinks about it some more, and eventually he figures he can keep thinking about it, keep wondering, or he can try something out. So he does, brings Sheppard a coffee and a cookie mid-morning, sliding them along Sheppard's desk, and saying, lightly, just sarcastically enough that he can blow it off if he has to, "Figured you'd gotten used to people bringing you food, Princess." And then he steps back and watches to see what happens.

What happens is that Sheppard's eyes widen slightly. The tips of his ears turn pink, and a flush rises from his neck to his cheeks.

[red-eft]

ooOO 3, 8, 13, and 15 for!! Lorne and Adonis

hell yea !!! my boys

3. is there any weird habits your oc has?

adonis has weird habits inherited from the creature his heart used to belong to! he suppressed those habits when he was still part of his noble house, but once he ran away, he stopped hiding them so much. he makes strange sounds sometimes- growls, huffs, rumbles, etc... he also moves a bit unnaturally. you know how some animals turn their head sharply at any interesting sound? he does that.

lorne has a habit of cracking his joints (knuckles, neck, and back). he also has a habit of keeping himself very clean thanks to his early days as a knight-errant. lorne used to be extremely reckless in combat and almost always had some kind of wound that needed to be kept clean, which led to him forming the habit ^^

8. what’s something that your oc is insecure about? Something that someone could say to them that would really get under their skin?

oohoo. adonis would be insecure if you called him out for being a coward. it's true that he's a coward early on, but he becomes braver over time. you could also bother him by calling him a monster and/or pointing out his inhuman traits (scales, horns, tail). he eventually accepts these traits, though, and becomes proud of them.

by the end of his character arc, the only real way to get under his skin would be to mock the fact that he was born and raised in a corrupt noble house (he's super ashamed of it).

lorne is insecure about the fact that he'll never be a "true" knight. in my setting, the only knights are ones belonging to house rinn. lorne was trained by their enemy, an ex-knight that was supposed to be executed for insubordination but instead ran away. lorne would never be accepted into house rinn unless he betrayed his mentor, which he would never do. his failure to become a knight is something that haunts him even after his character arc resolves. knighthood was his greatest dream. he'll always be a little bothered by having failed at it.

side note- if he had become a knight, he would have been a lot less happy in life and would have been killed only a few years later, but that's a topic for another time 👀

lorne is also insecure about a scar he got across his face while trying to protect adonis. this insecurity fades with time, but if you mocked him while it was still fresh, he'd probably punch you. he's never super proud of it, but does accept it as a representation of his resolve to keep his loved ones safe.

i guess a common theme in my story is learning to accept things as they are and become proud of what you've done? didn't intend for that theme but hmmm. nice.

13. if your oc had one day where they could do anything without being caught, what would they do?

adonis would probably spend the day just doing normal things. he'd explore the markets in a city, have a drink or two at the tavern, etc... he'd just do the mundane things he never had the chance to do while he was part of house vargoba/before he took on a more monstrous appearance.

lorne would spend the day sneaking around one of house rinn's strongholds. he'd watch their training sessions, snoop through their archives, and maybe even steal a shiny new greatsword (a weapon used exclusively by house rinn knights, illegal to make or trade anywhere else) to bring to his mentor? nothing malicious, though.

15. how far would your oc go to keep their secrets secret? How low would they stoop?

OOH. adonis doesn't have any major secrets these days, but hypothetically if he had a very important secret.... he might kill to keep it safe. it depends on who's threatening to spill his secret and what the consequences of killing them would be. he'd rather find a way to resolve the matter peacefully. he's not above blackmailing others, for instance.

lorne would not kill to keep a secret. that said, he would definitely knock someone out if they threatened to spill the secrets of his loved ones (adonis, ivy, and his mentor).

[chasingfictions]

ats is better than btvs dont let the fact that im posting this on april 1st give u any wrong ideas i am one hundred percent serious about this

FIRST OF ALL who needs stories about women and queerness when you can have stories about big men saving tiny women except sometimes he doesnt successfully save tiny woman and then he has to be sad about it :(((((((((((

SECOND OF ALL btvs wastes all this time developing its women characters' arcs based on who they are as independent people and their psyches when it would have been way more efficient to just build their story arcs out of how they fit into the lives of the men around them. it just saves time. and isnt that what you want from a story? to just get in and out as soon as possible?

THIRD OF ALL it's insane to me that btvs doesnt even find time for One mystical pregnancy plotline??? it's just such an obvious fantasy show trope and it feels like they dont even respect the genre to not include it, like ats does it ??? what? 5 times? 6? which is a sign of what a mature show it is, that it keeps revisiting this theme to give it new layers of meaning (about how women should be punished for existing. obviously).

FOURTH OF ALL ats just improves on all btvs characters who cross over. first of all, putting faith in prison? where she Belongs??? was a brilliant point. btvs as a show is far too loose and radical with the law. ats makes a firm stand that crime is crime and should be punished ideally with well-funded and cruel judicial systems. and buffy? i know she's barely on the show but i think her two brief windows on ats are better than all of her portrayals on all of btvs. like, buffy is just so much more interesting to me as a symbolic representation of angel's angst than she is on her own terms, and i think ats really understands that. not to mention how much better spike is on ats. he can really get back to his roots as a comic relief character. which is such a better use for him than trying to make him a romantic lead. i mean spike?? a romantic lead??????? insane and yet another reason btvs doesnt have rights.

FIFTH OF ALL it just has such complex plotting. btvs would never have the guts to do a full memory wipe of an entire person from the other characters' minds as it enters its final season and then never really touch on what that means for them or how it's affected their relationships with each other. like, btvs was way heavy-handed foreshadowing dawn's existence and then spending all this unnecessary time in s5 working through how dawn's existence impacts buffy's psyche. ats doing a much more understated approach of hardly ever mentioning connor at all in s5 or considering how his absence would impact things is a way more mature form of storytelling :))) like, it's show don't tell. that's writing school day one.

SIXTH OF ALL i just think btvs is really reverse-misogynist at a certain point. it's like, by the time we get to the late seasons there's basically no men on the cast? ats really balances that out and makes sure we're getting men's perspectives in storytelling :) which is something really lacking from media :) that plus all the time they spend on a gay relationship when it's like,, why do we have to make a whole thing about how willow and tara are gay? isnt that reducing them to their queerness??? isnt it actually far more progressive to work like ats, and kind of vaguely imply lorne is gay with the everything about him but never actually say so and blatantly contradict it in dialogue? just to keep 'em guessing, you know. the last thing you want is for a show to be obvious

my only gripe with ats is that they bother building up side characters when it should be much more focused on angel himself. like literally who cares about characters like fred or gunn or lorne or lilah? i think it would have been a much tighter show if they had just focused on classically grizzled and complex male protagonists like angel and wesley and lindsey. none of them got nearly enough screentime or attention paid to their development. i mean thank god they killed off cordy and fred by mystical pregnancy and stopped paying attention to gunn and lorne's characters in ways that made sense and wrote lilah off to be replaced with a discount lilah who didnt matter for the final season? so we could really spend time with the characters who matter? but like, they could have done that way sooner

[kasdeyalilith]

Lorn (III)

Lorn I, Lorn II

It wasn't long after you joined the Watatsumi Army when you crossed paths with an interesting traveller. What strikes you the most at the first meeting is his braided blonde locks and golden eyes, you're pretty sure that you've encountered someone with the same features. If you're guessing then they might be relatives like twins but it's been 500 years since you last saw that certain person and it didn't end well. Maybe Aether is her descendant? It's a reasonable explanation you thought.

The traveler is accompanied by a floating small person called Paimon; spending time with them made you like her since you both have a love of food and even composed a song whenever the two of you encounter a vendor.

"Paimon is so hungry, can we go back to the city and grab a snack? I want some dango 🍡 "

I nodded at that and looked at Aether with the best puppy eyes I can muster

"Guys you know that Teppei is waiting for us at Watatsumi right? It's rude of us if we kept him waiting" Aether looked at Paimon and me with a stern face

"But-"

"Aether is right Paimon" I said then winked at her in Aether's back. "Let's go eat dango later when he's busy"

"Yay you're Paimon's best friend now! Unlike someone" she crosses her arms and stick her tongue at the traveler

"You're my emergency food after all Paimon" he chuckled and I joined too which made Paimon have a mini tantrum

"Hey! I'm not an emergency food! I'm Paimon!"

"Whatever you say Foodie"

"(Y/n)!!! I thought you're on my side!"

"Sorry hahahaha let me make it up to you by cooking some sweet madame"

"Good!"

Aether simply shook his head and lectured me on spoiling Paimon excessively. I laughed at him and promised to keep Paimon from overeating later on. We arrived on Watatsumi Island later thanks to Aether's boat, and it was the last time I rode on a boat with the traveller driving because he always makes the boat sail faster than it should, leaving me hurling my lunch into the sea. I told Aether about it, and he blushed and apologized, but it turns out he just likes to do it, according to Paimon.

I've been assisting the army for months, and Teppei met me while I was teaching some of the soldiers. He's an ambitious and kind young man, so it's not surprising that I struck up a friendship with him. He reminded me of the feisty and daring friends I had back then. He's the one that shows the traveler about, and I decided to accompany him because Kokomi doesn't have any work for me right now.

"Teppei!!!"

"Oh good you're all here! Paimon, Aether, and (Y/n), by the way Her Excellency wants to speak to you traveler. She said it's very important, come I'll lead you to her"

Our party followed the wooden bridge that connects the shrine from the village, I sometimes poke the jellyfish around me while Paimon rides on one. I said a quick goodbye to the trio, telling them to go meet the Priestess without me as I saw the soldier Kokomi assigned for helping me find Kuni.

"Hi Yato!"

"Oh lady (Y/n)!"

"I told you to not call me lady, it makes me feel so old"

"My apologies (Y/n), it's not everyday that I get to meet a deity"

"Oh shush it Yato besides I've been nagging you everyday for information, I'm sure you've had enough of me being an annoyance to you"

"Of course not la-(Y/n) besides I think you'll like the new information I gathered today"

"You don't mean that-"

"Yes. After months of spying their camp, we managed to see a person that perfectly fits the description you gave us. A short man with purple hair that looks like the Electro Archon!"

"That's Kuni!!! He's really here! He came back!" I had tears already forming in my eyes as I clasp my hands near my heart to prevent it from bursting out

"But he doesn't have a long hair unlike the description you gave and he's not dressed in their usual uniform, he's more like a civilian to me that has a big hat"

"Maybe he cut it short, it's been years after all. If he's not wearing their uniform then he's already quitting the Fatui, that must be why he came back home although I don't get why he didn't go straight to our house" I sighed feeling sad all of the sudden, Yato took notice of my defeated stance and immediately reassured me

"He might be finishing some unfinished business with them, it's the Fatui we're talking about. They're strict with their soldiers"

"Yeah you're right. I shouldn't meddle with his decisions but can I ask where did you last see him?"

"He's at the Tatarasuna island, we don't know why the Fatui are camping there but there's a lot of them going to the island every passing day"

"What's for sure is that they're up to no good, I'll tell the Priestess about this. She might know something about it. On the other hand, thank you very much Yato! You kept your word when you said you'll help me find him. I'm forever in your debt, ask anything of me and I'll try to make it happen"

"It's nothing (Y/n), it's a small repayment of you helping us be stronger. Without you, I'll be flailing my arms around using a spear" he chuckled while scratching the back of his head

"That won't do, let me treat you of anything. Oh I know! How about I give something for your wife and unborn child" I reached for my hair and unpinned the green butterfly pin I'm wearing

"Here have this, a friend gave it to me a long time ago but I think your wife needed it more than me"

He gaped at the pin and shakes his head. "I can't accept such valuable gift my lady, it must be worth of millions of mora!"

"It's my gift for you to express my gratitude, it has the power to heal any discomfort you may experience such as headaches. It can't heal severe diseases though but it helped me deal any mild pains cause I'm clumsy back then hehe"

"Thank you so much (Y/n)!!! I'll never forget your kindness"

"It's nothing Yato, if you'll excuse me I'll report to Kokomi now. It seems that they're finished in discussing with the traveler"

"Of course, have a good day (Y/n)!"

"You too" I waved Yato goodbye then skipped my way towards the center of the shrine. I still can't believe that Kuni is here in Inazuma, I'm itching to go after him in Tatarasuna but it can wait. There's a reason why Kuni didn't go directly at our house and I have to carefully plan my next steps. If I can wait for years, surely I can wait for a few days more.

"Kokomi!"

"Hello (Y/n), you look like you're in a great mood today"

"They finally found Kuni" I beamed

"That's great news! I'm happy for you (Y/n), are you going to meet him then?"

"Not today, it seems like he's still finishing something with the Fatui and I don't want to trouble him. Yato said he doesn't look like he's a part of the Fatui anymore since he doesn't wear their uniform"

"That's good to hear-"

"Wait your boyfriend is part of the Fatui?!" Paimon exclaimed

"Was I think but yeah, he followed after them to help him with his powers" I told them about how the Fatui promised to help Kuni in exchange of him joining their ranks.

"Oh then he's a part of those bad guys that made trouble with Liyue and Mondstadt. Especially the harbingers, they almost killed Paimon! And that harbinger named Scaramouche tricked us! Good thing our friend Mona knew before he made a move to kill Paimon with his hat "

"Hat? But sadly yes, I heard of what they did from Barbatos and Morax too. It's still unbelievable for Tsaritsa to be behind all this, she changed a lot over the years"

"Wait!!! You know tone-deaf bard and Zhongli??! How am I only hearing this now?!" She's now hysterical as she throws her hands in the air while the traveler only looked at me deeply

"(Y/n) is a goddess like them-"

"but not an Archon" I continued

"You're like the god of Salt that Zhongli introduced us to" Aether replied

"Yup"

"If that's so.... can I ask something about my missing sis-"

"Lady Kokomi! My apologies to disrupt your meeting but our front line is being attacked by pirates. They've formed a large group and greatly outnumbered us and took all our supplies!" A soldier with jet black hair was panting with a panicked look on his face

"(Y/n) can I ask for your assistance? I need you in the front line to help our army, I'm so sorry that I have to place this to you but I can't go there personally as I'm still negotiating with someone to aid us"

"Sure thing, you can count on me" I looked at the traveler and Paimon who seemed equally worried as me. "I'll entertain your questions later Aether and Paimon but for now be safe"

"You too (Y/n)! Don't forget our dango eating contest!" Paimon shouted at me while the traveler merely nodded at my direction

I smiled at them and followed the soldier to the boat that'll lead us to the front line.

By the time we arrived at the camping site, almost all of the barriers and supplies are gone. I can see wounded soldiers are being taken in from the fight while others are repairing the damage the best they can.

I walked over to Gorou who's close to snarling at this point, his tail is down and ears are twitching.

"Hey, Kokomi sends me here to help. Are you alright?"

"Yeah but a lot of the soldiers are wounded badly. The pirates attacked us out of nowhere, it looks like it's a planned attack and I didn't even see it coming" his ears dropped and his tail even lower

"Gorou it's not your fault, someone must've helped those pirates to attack the camp like this. They usually steered clear of us but this time they got confident, they must've someone backing them up. Don't worry we'll get to the bottom of this but for the meantime let's fix what we can"

"You're right, thanks for us helping us (Y/n)"

"It's my pleasure"

Throughout the day, I made medicines from plants and cured for any broken limbs. The sun is already rising by the time I'm finished wrapping the bandage around one of the soldiers that got impaled by a sword in his shoulder. Gorou is busy in helping soldiers patch up the barriers that surrounds the ground, I haven't told him about the good news about Kunikuzushi as it'll be inappropriate in this situation. I'll be stuck here for a while since I have to cater to their wounds, meeting Kuni will have to wait.

It wasn't long before we ran out of plants to use as medicine, even the herbs I grew in my garden is not enough so I have no choice but to go out and gather for more. If only wolfhooks grow around these parts, they're good at treating wounds but for now I have to settle for some sweet flowers.

I was humming a ballad when I heard a commotion behind me, twig branches snapping as someone stepped on them. I looked around, and to my horror, I had gone too far in picking flowers. I'm now close to Tatarasuna, and the air is dense with electricity. How could I have missed it? A couple more twigs snapped, but this time I'm ready to confront the person hiding behind the bushes. They could be the Fatui, and I'd rather fight them than flee. The anticipation of who was making the noise became stronger and louder until that person emerged from hiding and confronted me.

I was stunned for a moment, dropping everything I was holding as I glanced at him; he has the same expression as I do. Our eyes are both wide with surprise, but I'm the one who broke the silence and raced to him first.

"Kunii!" (Y/n) hugged me so hard that I stumbled and dropped my hat in the process. I saw my soldiers immediately emerging from the ground thinking that she's attacking me but I managed to make them go away with a harsh glare before she notice.

I was surprised to see her here. According to the soldier I assigned to care after her, she's meant to be on Watatsumi Island with the Priestess's inept army. Not here, I'm on the verge of hitting her since she's going dangerously close to our camp without realizing it's (Y/n). He'll never be able to forgive himself if he hurts his lover, so he's lucky he saw her face first.

"You're here! You came back to me, I missed you so much!"

"I miss you to- ouch what's that for?" I cradled the spot where she punched me

"That's for not contacting me for years! And not replying to my letters. Do you know how much wine I owe to that sneaky bard for delivering those letters? Or you didn't receive any of it?!" She gasped and apologized for hitting me. I stared at her for a few seconds because I can't get enough of how cute she is kissing my cheeks while saying sorry.

"The Fatui must've treated you badly and took all of my letters from you! You're not a part of that organization now right? I'll show that Cryo Archon to not mess with me or you or anyone just because she have powerful harbingers. Such awful individuals killing and hurting from many lands just to gain something"

I internally choked at what she said, I know the Fatui have a bad reputation among people but it still hurts to hear it from her. She also indirectly said that I'm awful and my heart squeezed in pain at her words, she have a good reason to say that though.

"Yeah I'm not part of them anymore, I managed to escape their grasp but I'm not fully out of the woods yet. I'm sorry for not looking for you the moment I came back" Lies. He immediately went to your shared home the moment his boat docked in Ritou. His past judgements gone, he just wanted to see your face even for a brief moment. He opted to see a glimpse of you as he hide behind the big Sakura tree but you're not there.

After dispatching a search party for you, he discovered that you had joined the army in Watatsumi. His fears and uncertainties flooded his mind; did you forget about him and join the army? Maybe you got bored of waiting for him because he hadn't spoken to you in a long time. That didn't stop him from sending someone to find out everything about what you're doing on that island, and he's relieved once his soldier relayed that you're merely assisting the army and serving as their doctor. He also informed him that you are still unmarried, which made Scaramouche relieved because he was about to pass out.

There is a possibility that you still love him, and he clutches that possibility hard, telling himself to complete the task here quickly and return to you. His initial plan was to unleash the locked power within him in order to strengthen himself to protect you, but he's now so drunk with power that he's reconsidering his decision to leave the Fatui. Tsaritsa offered him a world devoid of Archons. If she succeeds in her plan, he want such world for himself and (Y/n).

He knows how much you've hurt because of the gods back then and he wants to kill every last one of them to prevent it from happening again. He can achieve it through the Tsaritsa, for now he needs to lie to you. It's for your sake, he keeps repeating to himself. He needs to change his plans, pretend that he's not part of the Fatui anymore as you won't be agreeing with him since they poisoned your mind about the organization. He just have to convince you little by little until you understand him.

"Really? That's good to hear Kuni, you're gonna stay then?" She hugged me again while she buries her head in my neck, taking a deep breath which made me blush. I have to stop doing that now since I have a reputation to protect but my soldiers are out of sight so I let her coo at me like I'm a baby.

"Uh for now that is (Y/n)"

"Wait you're still gonna come back to them?"

She unwrapped herself around me and I already hate how her warmth left me the moment her face looked at me with hurt.

"I still need to fix something with them as I said earlier but I promise that it won't be long" I pulled her in for a kiss as I can't control myself anymore, I don't care if anyone catches us. I just want to bask in her presence forever.

Part 3 is out whew, I'm sorry if this took so long but I plan to finish this series before 2022 comes so fingers crossed! Thanks for reading as always

[summers-pratt]

The more I hear about ATS, the less appealing the idea of watching it becomes, and the more I hear about ATS!Angel, the less appealing his character becomes (I mean the bar was already six feet below the ground, but that’s besides the point).

(Some slight general spoilers for Angel: the Series ahead so if you do want to watch it without knowing anything going in, be aware)

Yeah it is not a great time lol I only watched it bc I didn't know who all these people who kept popping up in post-chosen fics were and learned they were ats characters, so I was like "well I guess I have to watch this now" but overall it is,,,not the best. It does make Angel's character way worse than it does in btvs (and yeah like you said, already a pretty low bar), and while it was annoying (to say the least) to watch five seasons of this fucking guy just making worse and worse decisions and screwing over more and more people, and have the writers still try to present this awful guy as a protagonist you should root for, it does paint him in an awful light, which was weirdly validating for someone who never was a fan of him in the first place. So yeah it's not fun, but in the process of making him some kind of anti-hero, it does shit on Angel a lot, which was nice.

That said, there are good parts that make it bearable; the Angel shitting for one. It also elaborates on the demon world, and has more grey area type demons that have more human-like personalities and are actually Characters, not just Bad Guys to kill; they are actually people, and it's really fun. I wish btvs had more of that, I think more complex demon characters are a lot more interesting than the mindless nasties we typically see (shoutout to Clem my beloved for breaking that mold in btvs). For example, Lorne is one of my favorite buffyverse characters and he runs a karaoke bar (and is very heavily queercoded but oops can't make that explict or ratings would go down i guess idk fuck that tho he's gay and I love him) and he is just generally a fantastic character. Other great characters include Cordelia, who of course is a lot of fun and she gets to grow a lot and I ended up liking her even more; Fred is adorable (though I think she should've been gay but that's just me) and Amy Acker acts her ass off in the last season it's truly phenomenal oh my god; Darla comes back for a bit which is fun and she has some of the most gut wrenching lines, they alone almost make the entire show worth watching, Julie Benz is a gift; Gunn is really cool and plays off other characters well and is just generally a really fun character; and of course Spike comes back in the last season (which was the other main reason I watched this show bc I love him). However. All of these characters (and more!) get screwed over by the writers. Repeatedly. I'm talking multiple (yes. Multiple.) unwanted/nonconsenual pregnancies, I'm talking killing off characters, I'm talking screwing up character arcs, I'm talking not watching the last three seasons of btvs and completely not understanding a character so bad you undo seasons worth of development. Also, as a whole, the show just does not like women. Like, by the end of it (spoilers ahead), every major female character is killed off in some way. And the way they each die is not meaningful or even cool, it just happens and the male characters around them get to react to it and use it to further develop and continue on their arcs. It's bullshit. Every character that you like ends up dying or turning into something very much not them. It sucks. Also the plot is just hard to follow and makes absolutely no sometimes and is just straight dogshit at others.

Broad strokes, it's a bad show. But there are good parts that make me glad I watched it. If you do watch it, you really only need to half pay attention to it to get what you need to out of it, in my opinion. If nothing else, I like that I know more about the world and it makes fic a little more fun to read when you know the characters from it. Also know if you do watch it, most other btvs fans (from what I can tell) also don't like it, so you're in good company lol

Happy watching! (or not watching!)

[hangovercurse]

Mind Over Matter

A phone call at 4 in the morning turns into a very deep conversation with your good friend, Pete.

Pete Davidson x Reader

Warnings: Cursing, existential philosophy

A/N: Inspired by Mind Over Matter by PVRIS

Word Count: 1771

There was nothing you hated more than being woken up at 4am on your day off. But someone had decided that they needed to call you, so you were awake. Your hand reached around for your phone, your head not lifting from the pillow. Once you found it you brought the screen to your eyes, squinting.

You couldn’t help but feel a little less angry when you saw Pete’s contact picture. Of course it would be him calling you at 4 am.

“Hey, Pete, what’s up?” Your voice came out scratchy and hoarse, a side effect of just waking up.

You could hear his heavy breathing on the other side, and your mind immediately went into worry mode. “Y/N I’m kind of really freaked out right now.”  

You sat up on the bed, turning your lamp on, “What’s going on?” Your feet touched the cold floor of your bedroom as you stood up, stumbling tiredly to your dresser and throwing on a pair of sweatpants.

“I’m really trippin’ out right now.” You could hear how far gone he was now that you were more awake.

You sighed, stopping your rushed actions. “Pete, I thought you weren’t taking that much anymore? Remember you said you wanted to get better?”

He let out a breath, “I know, I had a bad day. But the drugs aren’t helping. Everything feels so much worse and I’m really scared. You told me to call you whenever I needed someone and I really need you.”

You tried to keep your breathing steady, so he couldn’t hear how sad you were. Pete had been working so hard to get to a good place, and he was so close. To hear him so upset crushed you. “Okay, I’m on my way over. Are you gonna be okay for a few minutes while I’m on my way over there?”

You grabbed your keys from your counter and threw on your slip-on vans. “Can you stay on the phone with me?” His voice was timid, and you frowned.

“Of course, Pete. I’m leaving my house right now.” Luckily, his house was only a few blocks down from yours, so you were there in no time. You stayed on the phone with Pete the whole time, not saying much but reassuring him you were coming.

When you got to his home, you walked around the house to Pete’s door. “Hey, Petey, I’m gonna come in, okay?” You asked through the door, hand on the handle. Your best friend gave you a small noise of confirmation, so you let yourself in. You found him sitting on the floor, his back pressed against the foot of his bed.

You walked towards him slowly, settling on the ground in front of him. You took in his appearance, the dark bags under his eyes, the tear tracks on his cheeks, the ruffled hair from him running a hand through it too much. He reached out and grabbed your hand, holding it in his. You didn’t want to force him to talk, so you sat in silence until he was ready.

“How do I know that you’re real?” He asked, his voice low.

You tilted your head, squeezing his hand, “Because I’m sitting in front of you.”

He shook his head, dropping your hand and letting out a sigh. “Yeah, but how do I know that this isn’t just something I’ve made up in my head?”

You smiled, “Pete, can you tell me what you took?” You assumed he was worried you were a hallucination from shrooms.

“No, that’s not what I mean.” He rubbed his hands over his face. “I mean I took shrooms but I’m not talking about that. I mean how do I know that anything is real?”

“What do you mean, Pete?” You’d only seen this side of Pete a handful of times.

He looked up at you, his eyes finding yours. “I mean like, what if everything is just in my head? Like I don’t know that you’re real, I don’t know if anything is true. What if this is just some dream I’m having and I’m gonna wake up one day and it’s gonna be gone?”

You scooted closer to the man, your arm reaching out to him. “Reach out your hand and hold mine.” He did as he was told, and you intertwined your fingers. “Can you feel that?” You asked him.

He nodded, “But what if I’m just imagining it?”

You bit your lip, trying to find a way to calm him down. “Pete, this isn’t in your head, I promise. Your brain is just in a weird place right now. I am very real.” Your voice was soft, trying not to worry him.

“But I don’t know that Y/N. All I know is that I really want this to be real.” His voice gave away how scared he really was.

You reached your free hand to touch his cheek, rubbing your thumb over his skin gently. “I need you to trust me, Petey. I am just as real as you are.”

He leaned into your touch, a soft smile on his face. “I just don’t know how you can be real. Like I had to have made you up, no one like you would be friends with a guy like me.”

You frowned, moving so you were beside Pete on your knees, and wrapped your arms around him. You didn’t really know how to respond to that, he’d never said anything like it before. “And I mean, you’re so perfect. Like I feel like such a perfect person shouldn’t exist. That’s why I’m scared that you’re just some kind of dream.”

He leaned his body into yours, his head resting on your shoulder. “I’m not a dream, Pete. I’m really here, and I’m not gonna go anywhere.” You whispered, your nose brushing the side of his head. “If I wasn’t real, could I be holding you right now?”

He pulled away from you and you could tell he was starting to come down just a little bit, hopefully enough to pull him out of his thoughts. “I don’t know.” He mumbled, looking down.

You reached up to his jaw, moving his face so that he was looking at you. Your other hand ran through his hair, causing his eyes to close. “Could I do this?”

He smiled, looking like a cat whose head was being pet. “I guess not.”

You leaned closer to him, taking in all the features you knew so well. All the features you loved. And you knew you definitely shouldn’t kiss him, but if for some reason it went really badly, he probably wouldn’t remember and at least you would know. But you didn’t want to take advantage of his state. But it was just a kiss.

“If I wasn’t real, could I do this?” You whispered, your lips millimeters away from him. You paused, looking into his eyes, trying to read his emotions. You didn’t get much of a chance though, as Pete crashed his lips onto yours, one hand going around your waist and the other to the back of your neck.

You kissed him back, your lips moving together in sync. As cliché as it sounds, it felt right. As if you and Pete had been made for this moment.

When you pulled away for air, he rested his forehead on yours. “Okay, you’re definitely not real.” He muttered, out of breath.

You smiled, rolling your eyes slightly. “Eventually you’re just gonna have to accept that I am, in fact, a real person.”

“No real person like you would kiss me.”

“Well, I just did.” You smiled, “And I’ll do it again.”

You brought your head to meet his, lips colliding once again. Pete pulled you closer to him, so you were fully on your knees. He brought his hand to the back of your thigh, pulling your leg over him so you were sitting on his lap in front of him.

“Will you stop invalidating my existence now?” You asked with a giggle. Pete smiled, nodding in response. “Do you wanna talk about why you had a bad day?”

Your hand moved to gently run up and down his arm, trying to keep him calm. “I dunno, sometimes it just kind of happens, I guess. And then I got this email from Lorne about the show next week, and Colson won’t text me back, and I just got really messed up about all of it.” You nodded, letting him continue. “I’m sorry that I took all this shit. And that I called you so late. Sorry you have to deal with all my shit.”

You frowned, tilting your head, and resting one head on his cheek. “You don’t have to be sorry, Pete. You had a bad day, it happens. You took shrooms, it’s okay. Everyone relapses, its part of getting better. But Peter Michael Davidson, don’t ever apologize for needing me. I told you to call me, I want you to call me when things get bad. I’d rather you wake me up every day for the rest of my life than for you to suffer alone. I don’t wanna think about what could happen if you don’t call me.”

He nodded, and you smiled sadly at him. “You’re my best friend, Pete. I’m here for you, no matter what. People love you and care about you.” You paused, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He whispered, leaning so his forehead was resting against yours. “Can I kiss you again?”

You chuckled, pecking his lips before moving backwards. “As much as I would love that, you’re still pretty high. We need to get you some water and some sleep and then maybe, if you still want to kiss me tomorrow, we can see.”

He pouted as you stood up, walking to grab the water bottle from his desk. When you stood in front of him, he reached up with both arms, making grabby hands at you. You held out the water bottle for him to take, but he just swatted at it. You realized what he wanted and rolled your eyes, grabbing onto his hands and pulling him up, struggling against gravity.

“Can you stay here for tonight?” He asked, looking down at you with big brown eyes.

You sighed, knowing he probably wasn’t sober enough to be making that decision. “I’ll stay, but I’m gonna sleep on the couch.” You smiled, pushing him towards his bed. He whined, but you ignored him and walked away. “We’ll talk about it in the morning.” You said, shaking your head.