#lot of my first time coding i poured into it

[sachisei]

arcanistsanctum is gone. we're back.

Update here.

Message below the cut is outdated.

Depressing news. I wake up today to not find the blog. I expected it to happen some time, but not this soon. If it got DMCA-ed, I'm supposed to receive a notice of the claims but I did not. So I plan to reach out to Tumblr Support soon regarding this.

Unfortunately, I didn't back up the blog. Not the contents nor the codes. I feel devastated. I regret not backing it up. I almost couldn't find the energy to claim it back. If we're not getting it back, honestly, I don't think I will be motivated enough to re-create it again. I'd say it was a good run and all that. But before that, I will try to get it back for you guys. And again, if not, I think the arcanistsanctum blog will deviate from archiving official media, especially if the reasons of the shutdown is DMCA or Copyright Infringement. I read the Reverse:1999 terms before, and all I can say is that they have ambiguous terms there, especially relating to copyright. Basically, they mentioned they reserve the right to take down content related to Reverse:1999 without explanation and warning. That may be the case here. I won't press too hard on that matter. It is their IP, after all. It is what it is.

This is the first time I had a tumblr blog taken down. I'm new to the processing and stuff, so (sigh) bear with me y'all.

Nothing changes for me uploading Reverse 1999 reaction videos in youtube. I'm still editing my reactions to 1.7 Version Update. I'll notify here once I publish the video.

I wish you guys well, and I apologize for the lack of preparation on my part. I'm not sure how soon we'll hear back from Tumblr. Until then, I can be contacted here. Of course, I'll update you guys on the status of arcanistsanctum here.

[asxgard]

I wanted something where Abbott gets involved with a younger resident — maybe everyone in the ER knows about it, except the interns, since it’s their first day. Maybe the resident doesn’t like Trinity’s style, and Trinity goes to complain to Jack, but Jack defends his resident.

In Your Defense | one shot

Dr. Jack Abbot x f!resident!reader

Requested

Summary: After getting on your nerves all day, you and Santos finally go toe-to-toe over a patient. Jack comes to your defense.

[ My Masterlist ]

Note: I’ve been floating around ideas of my own of Jack with a resident👀so this was fun!

Sorry it took a bit! I got distracted with a few other things, and I wanted to make sure Companionship got out yesterday. Plus, this became a lot longer than I originally intended. I hope you like it @mayabbot !

Word Count: 2.7k

Most of my works are 18+ due to adult language and content.

Warnings: age gap, semi-established relationship, foul language, hospital setting, medical inaccuracies, mild Santos hate due difference in style, Pittfest

not beta read

The thing about Dr. Jack Abbot was, you did not need a label to know what you meant to him. There was no officiality of a title, even though you were both serious about each other — but frankly, the title was just a word. You knew where you stood, spending nights in his apartment and cooking breakfast together. He never hesitated to remind you that you belonged to him. Not in the overly possessive way, but in the silent always there type of way.

Jack had a past, and while you never pushed, he opened slowly. He had held you out of reach for some time before you realized what was truly brewing between you, and after he began to share, you thought the slow, quiet way you existed around each other was enough. He had loved and lost, he had fought and sacrificed, so you always assured him there was no rush. Not with you. You supposed there would be something to be said when you finished your residency, since that was a big priority in your life, but that was still a year away.

Like most things, your relationship with Jack did not stay secret for long in the halls of the Pitt. You really should have known better — Princess and Perlah were bloodhounds when it came to sniffing out things like that, and the bet did little to keep it private. You were unsure who had started it, but you were surprised that it was Robby who had walked away with the money. It felt like cheating, since he had insider knowledge after catching the two of you at a bar, but you never said anything.

Waking up in his bed alone was not uncommon — since after your dayshifts you sometimes would just wander to his apartment as opposed to your own. You would curl into his sheets and his smell, even when he would not be home all night. He never minded, and frankly even encouraged it. Working opposite shifts than him cut back on time you had together, but you knew it was only a matter of time before you were back on nights due to your flip-flopping schedule.

He looked worn down when you arrived at the Pitt for your shift, bright-eyed from a full night's rest in his bed. He followed you into the staff lounge so you could put your lunch away and he poured a bit of coffee to top off your thermos.

“Is it a ‘good morning’ type of morning, or a quiet ‘let me contemplate’ type of morning?”

He pursed his lips, “Neither. I lost a vet last night, spent two hours coding him.”

You sucked in a breath, knowing it had been a rough one for him. Those nights were far and few between, but never handled them very well. He was getting better, but oftentimes, he found himself on the roof.

“I’m sorry, Jack,” You said, knowing there was not much to say that would actually make it feel any better. “I made dinner last night, I left some leftovers in your fridge.”

He nodded, “At least we’ll have tonight and tomorrow together.”

You smiled, “I’m looking forward to it. Meet at yours?”

“Do you even have to ask?”

You chuckled, “Go get some rest, old man.”

An eyebrow rose in a challenge, “You won’t be saying that later.”

You smirked, “Counting on it.”

He gave you a rushed kiss on the lips, ensuring it was quick and private, before he was out the door. You sipped on your coffee and let out a long sigh, moving towards the charge desk and greeting Dana with a grin.

You let out a low whistle when you looked up at the board, “Damn, they got hammered last night.”

Frank Langdon stepped beside you to lean against the desk, “Why do I have a feeling you’re going to say the Q word? Don’t you dare, or I swear to god.”

You raised an eyebrow at him, “It was one time over a year ago. Who do I look like? Shen? I’m no longer an amatuer.”

“I’m so glad I don’t work with him much. He’s like a walking jinx at this point.”

“He’s not so bad.” You laughed, “I see we got some newbies.”

Langdon glanced over his shoulder, “Two med students, an intern and an R2.”

“Oh, fun.”

—

You learned all the new faces over the course of the next hour. You found you liked the med students well enough, and the R2, Melissa King, but the intern was beginning to rub you the wrong way. Calloused and indifferent did not mesh well in the chaos of the Pitt, or the team player attitude Robby always tried to instill in everyone.

Santos was the type of person you had vehemently disliked during your med student rotations, and after hearing a few cruel nicknames she had picked for Whitaker and Javadi, you brought it to Langdon’s attention. According to Jack, Langdon had walked into the Pitt with the same type of overconfident attitude, and Robby had taken him under his wing and straightened him out. Maybe you thought he would pass on the wisdom. Not to mention, it took the drama off your plate. You had enough worries keeping your relationship with Jack away from Gloria’s ears, and the last thing you wanted to do was get in the middle of something.

“Trust me, I hear you. She already ordered something without clearing it with me first.”

Your nose scrunched in annoyance, “We don’t need someone like that down here.”

“Maybe you could let her shadow you…” he said, a smile growing as your annoyance did. “Show her the ropes. You know, that whole no-nonsense but still empathetic thing you’ve got going on might be right up her alley. You’d be a wonderful teacher.”

You deadpanned, “You owe me. Like super, major—”

“You’re the best!”

You wished you had gone to Collins instead.

Try as you did, the brashness of Santos did not quell under your careful hand and you grew more frustrated with her poor bedside manner and knack for doing things before clearing them. Just when you stepped away to use the restroom, she ordered BPAP for one of your patients and nearly killed him. Yelling was not in your wheelhouse, nor was letting something like this get the better of you, but as the shift ticked on, your fuse grew shorter. Screaming would be the worst teaching tool, but she seemed to railroad over any and all of your advice.

You passed her off to Mohan to take an hour seeing your own patients without Santos’ shadow. At the end of the hour, Mohan only gave you a knowing glance before getting back to it. By the time you went to complain to Langdon, he had disappeared. Just a bit after that, Robby sent Collins home.

Taking a deep breath, you pep-talked yourself into holding it in until the end of your shift. Then you could pass the news on to Robby and go home to forget about it.

—

When the mass casualty event was called, you fiddled with your hands, rubbing anxious circles on one of your palms. The shift had beat you up and left you out to dry, and you knew you were not likely to get out on time. Anxiety thrummed through your system, or perhaps it was the anticipation

Jack’s face was a welcomed one and you wanted to thank whoever you could that he had showed up when he did, a mess of supplies from his truck. With both Robby and Jack at the head of this, you knew the team would get through it. One patient at a time.

Robby placed you in the pink zone, with instructions to float over to yellow if they needed help. Jack found you in the supply closet trying to grab what you could to prepare for the influx in your zone, and he seemed to read you like your shift had been written on your face.

The braindead boy who no one could help. The drowned little girl no one could have saved. Dana being punched by an angry patient, which set your teeth on edge. The anguished screams of grieving family members. Your frustration with the cocky intern. Langdon abandoning you. Collins going home early. The anticipation of all the blood and loss that was sure to be waiting for you as soon as the first cars arrived with the Pittfest victims.

He squeezed your hand, “Find me if you need anything. I got you.”

There it was, that silent, all-knowing ‘always here’ anchor you had needed given in just a few simple words and a giant gesture. You smiled at him and squeezed his back, exhausted and relieved all at once.

You kicked it into gear, getting to work in your zone. Trying to ignore the tragedy around you and just focus on the medicine was easier said than done, especially getting more and more covered in blood as the shift dragged on. It truly was a blur, except for the fact that each patient was clear as day in your head.

Intubating, assessing, applying pressure to wounds, checking on the status of the operating rooms for your more critical patients, forwarding a few to red. Rinse. Repeat. A never ending cycle of carnage.

Mel whizzed past you and you looked back down at your patient, checking his pulse points. He was as stable as he was going to get, and you waved McKay over to him so you could run by yellow zone to see if they needed anything.

Whitaker’s wide eyes greeted you, “She’s doing a REBOA.”

You stopped dead, “What? Who?”

His eyes looked over to Santos, who was leaning over a patient. All the blood rushed from your head, anger and fear tangling together.

Mel was beside you then, tapping her fingers together in an anxious fashion, “I told her—I tried—“

You swallowed before rushing forward. She had already inserted the balloon, and there was not much you could do. You had only done one before, during a mass pile up over a year before, but it was under Jack’s careful supervision.

“Are you insane?” You hissed low, trying not to cause a scene.

Santos only glanced at you, “Patient was bleeding out, need to—“

“No, no, no, no.” Something snapped and all the frustration you had been feeling all day came barreling out of you. “What you need to do, Dr. Santos, is clear shit like this with your senior resident. With an attending. Literally anyone else. Mel already told you no and what do you do? This is how people die. Doctors feeding their own fucking egos and not letting themselves be checked.”

She simply stared at you, “It’s already—“

“No, this was rash.” You glanced down at the patient, seeing that the balloon was likely already in place, but from Donnie’s grim features, the patient was not doing much better. “If it worked? Amazing, great. You saved a patient. But if you keep doing this shit, someone is going to die. You’re not as infallible as you seem to think you are.”

You felt him before you saw him, a once calming presence now beside you and it made all your hairs stand on end. Like you had been caught with your hand in the cookie jar.

At the hospital, he was your attending, you were the resident and you definitely should not have lost your cool like that in the middle of the shitstorm that was already occurring. You physically braced yourself, steeling your composure and trying not to wince. Jack did not scold in public, but you had made a scene.

Jack’s attention had been pulled away from his patient at a particular voice carrying through the air, growing louder as it continued. Your voice. Unmistakable and in the chaos, completely unnerving. It was not like you to shout, or yell, especially in the mess the Pitt had found itself in. He was walking towards your voice without even thinking about it, gait rushed but not running.

“She performed a REBOA.” Mel told Jack as he approached, eyeing each of you warily. “I told her not to.” She gestured to you. “She told her not to.”

You felt Jack’s eyes on your face, and you glanced over to him. He took in your features and looked back to Santos.

“A REBOA? Are you shitting me?”

“Dr. Abbot, I couldn’t get any of the attendings and the patient was bleeding out. No other options.” Santos told him, looking at you again. “I don’t think her yelling about it, or at me right now is exactly—“

“She is a resident and you are an intern. You never should have done that on your own, ever.”

You blinked, half surprised, half thankful. You never wanted your relationship with him to bleed into the professional act you two played whenever you were in the hospital. You never wanted him to play favorites or defend you when you didn’t deserve it. But a part of you relished in him supporting you. Especially after dealing with her going over your head your entire shift.

Two nightshift nurses — Alma and Riley — and Donnie exchanged knowing glances, hiding their smirks well, while Santos just stood there. Jack looked back to you and raised an eyebrow, asking if you were okay without any words.

You gave him the tiniest of nods, likely not to be seen as anything more than a twitch, but Jack caught it easily. You were okay, for the most part anyway. You could talk to him about all of it later. You hoped this could all be behind you soon, as mild embarrassment for yelling in the ED crept up your cheeks. You would pass along the information to Robby and let him handle it. He would be likely to scold you for losing your cool and yelling like he had earlier with Langdon, who was now back floating through zones with little explanation as to why he had left.

Santos looked between you two like she was trying to read you.

Jack had his focus back on the patient, asking Donnie for her vitals.

“Carotid’s weak. Radial’s barely there.” Donnie said.

“Another three cc’s in the balloon.” Jack advised and Santos followed the instruction.

Whitaker looked up, “Radial’s much stronger now.”

“Lock the balloon. Check the wound.”

“Wound’s dry, barely a trickle.”

“That’s because there’s no blood going to her legs.” Mel whispered from beside you.

“Get IR and Vascular on the case.”

The patient began coming to, opening her eyes and looking around her tiredly. There was a relief in the sight, but the fact that this would only make Santos more bold in the future made you worry.

Jack leaned in close to Santos, “That was reckless and could have killed the patient. You need to follow the chain of command here.”

Santos gave a tense nod, her tiny smile disappearing.

You stepped away when Jack did, finding a few moments when you pulled off your gown to replace it with a fresh one. He stepped behind you to tie it while you reached for new gloves.

“It’s been a shift.” You explained simply, not even needing him to open his mouth. “I don’t know what came over me. I’m sorry.”

“We can talk about it later.”

You turned to face him, “No, if you’re going to scold me, I’d rather you do it now. Get it out of the way.”

He studied your face. “Can’t change anything now. She did save the patient, but she could've just as easily made it worse. And you lost it for a minute. You know as well as anyone that yelling achieves nothing.”

You cringed, remembering your med school days.

“But you weren’t wrong.” He added, grabbing your arm and forcing you to look at him. “She took an unnecessary risk and hopefully next time, will try to find an attending, or a resident. I’ll mention it to Robby, maybe he can help her get back on track. The Pitt doesn’t need any more egos, I think we’re at capacity.”

A small smirk broke through on your lips, “Thank you.”

“You feel good enough to get back to it?” He raised a careful eyebrow.

You took a breath and nodded. You parted without ceremony, heading back to your respective zones and got lost in the work.

want to join any of my taglists? shoot me a message!

Dr. Abbot taglist: @flyinglama @valhallavalkyrie9 @melancholyy-hill @travelingmypassion @yournerdmodziata @dark-twisted-and-mechanical-mind @sarah-the-bird-nerd @artsymaddie @partofthelouniverse

The Pitt taglist: @cannonindeez @spoiledflor @kittenhawkk @nessamc @thatchickwiththecamera @sharkluver @loud-mouph @ksyn-faith @sunfairyy @dragonsondragons @mischiefsemimanaged

Did my own feelings about Santos bleed into this? …maybe. She grew on me, but oh my god she really was getting on my last nerve for most of this season. I hope season 2 comes with some growth from her.

[cbeargyu]

affection ✧.* c.soobin

summary: you weren’t looking for love. just… something. a hand to hold, a moment of quiet, a heart that didn’t feel so heavy. but chasing affection in the wrong places had left you emptier each time — until you met him. soobin. kind, gentle, patient soobin. you pushed him away when he tried to reach the parts of you you didn’t want anyone to see. but he stayed. he saw the broken pieces and didn’t flinch. and somehow, just standing next to him felt like coming home.

pairing: nerd!soobin x fem!reader

tags: angst, hurt/comfort, unrequited love, slow burn, mutual pining, emotional vulnerability, past trauma, soft smut, comfort sex, college au, emotional intimacy, fluff with heavy angst, crying during sex, heartbreak, toxic ex (jaehyun).

warnings: sexual content (soft smut, explicit but tender), emotional vulnerability, references to emotional manipulation/past toxic relationship, crying during intimacy, self-worth issues, mentions of emotional trauma, angst-heavy scenes, mild cursing, reader has intimacy and trust issues, soobin is the softest human alive and will make you cry (18+ only, minors DNI).

notes: i’m so happy and grateful for all the love the beomgyu fic has received — it truly means a lot to me 🥺🖤 just a reminder: English isn’t my first language, so thank you for your patience! This is also my first time writing smut, so I hope you enjoy it and feel the love I put into every word.

soobin never planned to go to that party. he had a project due on monday, a group report no one else was helping with, and a whole list of unread notifications in his coding forum. parties weren’t his scene. they were loud, chaotic, full of meaningless chatter and fake small talk.

but his roommate, choi beomgyu begged him to go — “come on, hyung, the girls from visual communication are joining this time. you can't code your youth away.”

so, reluctantly, soobin showed up, neat as always — white button-down shirt, black slacks, and his usual black-rimmed glasses that he adjusted every few minutes out of habit. while his classmates shouted over music and downed shots of soju like water, he sat at the far end of the table, sipping a soda, quietly observing.

that’s when you walked in.

he saw you before you noticed him. you wore confidence like perfume — not overwhelming, but impossible to ignore. your black crop top hugged your body perfectly, a short skirt revealing just enough, and those heeled boots clicked against the floor like a beat only you could walk to. your hair fell just right. your eyes scanned the room like you already owned it.

and then they landed on him.

you tilted your head curiously. he looked different from the others — formal, stiff, awkwardly seated like he was out of place. but there was something about him... maybe it was the way his lips twitched nervously whenever someone made a joke, or how his fingers tapped rhythmically on his glass, like his brain was always working on something unspoken.

you slid into the empty seat across from him.

“hi,” you said, voice clear and sweet, but assertive. “soobin, right?”

his eyes widened slightly. “y-yeah. How’d you—?”

“you’re the only one not yelling,” you smirked. “kinda refreshing.”

he chuckled nervously, pushing his glasses up. “i guess i don’t blend in much.”

“that’s a good thing,” you replied without hesitation. “wanna drink?”

he hesitated, eyes flickering to the soju bottle you were holding.

“i don’t really drink.”

you leaned closer, a playful smile on your lips. “i won’t let you overdo it. promise.”

something about the way you said it — lighthearted, but sincere — made him nod.

you poured the drinks. one. two. light sips. soft laughter. his walls started to come down, little by little. you asked about his major. he asked about yours. you joked about how communication students always had to look flawless for presentations, and he admitted he didn’t even own hair gel.

then, the conversation shifted.

“so, uh,” soobin began, scratching the back of his neck, “i’ve been playing around with some indie game engines. just as a hobby. i’m trying to create this… interactive narrative? like a retro pixel art game with moral choice-based paths. i know it sounds kinda nerdy—”

“nerdy?” you interrupted. “that sounds sick. wait—so, like, the player’s decisions affect the storyline?”

his eyes lit up. you weren’t mocking him — you were interested.

He nodded, and as he talked, he got more animated. His voice rose with excitement as he described the branching paths, the artwork, the emotional arcs. he didn’t notice the way you shifted closer, your hand now resting on the table near his. he didn’t notice the way your thigh gently brushed his leg under the table.

“so... moral choices, huh?” you say, chin propped on your hand as you watch soobin’s eyes light up with every word he speaks. “like what? save the princess or let her die?”

he laughs, warm and unguarded. “kind of. but more... morally gray. like: help your friend cheat on an exam and risk your own grade, or tell the professor and lose the friendship.”

you raise a brow, intrigued. “damn. that’s... deep. and very specific. did that happen to you?”

he chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck. “no. maybe. it’s a hypothetical.”

“right,” you say with a smirk, reaching for the soju bottle to pour another round. “well, professor choi, i hope you gave your digital friend some slack.”

“i made two endings,” he replies, then pauses. “wait, professor?”

you shrug, tilting your glass toward his. “you talk like one. all serious and nerdy.”

“i’m not��that serious,” he protests, smiling now, more relaxed.

you lean in slightly, voice soft. “you kind of are. but I like it.”

he’s silent for a moment, blinking.

then, in a softer voice, he asks, “what about you? i’ve been rambling this whole time. what’s your major again?”

“media production,” you say casually. “i make pretty things look important.”

he smiles. “sounds fun.”

you nod. “it is. lots of editing, lots of late nights. but i like telling stories.” you pause, your gaze dipping to his lips for the briefest second before locking eyes again. “even the fake ones.”

he laughs at that. “maybe you could help with the cinematics for my game.”

“only if you give me creative control over the main character’s love story.”

he raises a brow. “that’s... oddly specific.”

you wink. “everything’s a love story, soobin.”

he swallows, hard.

but he noticed when you suddenly leaned into him to hear better — the bar had gotten louder, the music thumping. your shoulder touched his. your chest grazed his arm. and for the first time in his life, choi soobin forgot how to breathe.

you didn’t pull away.

neither did he.

you both sip your soju, and for a moment, neither speaks. the table around you has gotten louder. someone yells out a drinking chant. you glance sideways, then lean in just a little more so he can hear you.

“you know,” you murmur near his ear, your breath warm against his skin, “your friend beomgyu is wasted.”

soobin follows your gaze. beomgyu’s halfway off his seat, swaying dramatically while trying to sing along to a girl group song.

he huffs a laugh. “he’s always like that. gets drunk off three shots and starts performing like he’s on music bank.”

you turn your face toward soobin’s, still whispering. your lips are inches from his ear. “at least he’s not in the bathroom with a sunbae.”

soobin blinks. “what?”

you grin. “my friends went with a few. they’ve been gone for a while.” you pause for dramatic effect. “you do know what happens when girls go to the bathroom with sunbaes, right?”

soobin’s entire face flushes.

“i—uh—i mean—maybe they’re just—talking?” he stammers.

you burst into soft laughter, brushing his knee with yours under the table. “you’re so pure, soobin.”

“i’m not!” he protests, but he’s still red, ears pink and glowing.

“oh, really?” you tease, tilting your head. “then why are you blushing so hard?”

he opens his mouth to say something, but no words come out. he looks away, adjusting his glasses, trying to hide the way his eyes keep drifting back to your lips — still glossed and shining from the soju.

you lean closer, your voice barely above a whisper now. “you’re cute when you’re flustered.”

soobin freezes.

you smile.

and he realizes something, right then and there: you're not just beautiful. you're dangerous.

the music booms louder. someone starts chanting for shots again. but for you and Soobin, the world has narrowed into one tiny space: the few inches between your face and his.

he’s looking at you like he’s not sure if this is real — like you might vanish if he blinks too long.

but you don’t.

instead, you stay close. too close. your perfume has wrapped around him like a spell, and your knee is still brushing against his. the room is hot, but it’s nothing compared to the burn beneath his skin.

“soobin,” you whisper again, teasing, your voice honeyed, “are you really as pure as you look?”

“i—” he starts, voice dry, but you cut him off.

you tilt your head and, without warning, you press your lips to his.

it’s soft.

just a taste.

he freezes for a second — surprised, breath caught — and then, like something deep inside him snaps, he kisses you back.

harder.

with need.

his hand finds your waist, gripping tight, pulling you closer with a quiet desperation. you gasp slightly against his mouth, not expecting the sudden boldness. but you love it. you lean in more, wrapping your fingers around the collar of his button-up shirt, tugging him toward you.

he tastes like soju and mint gum and something that’s just… soobin.

his other hand fumbles before settling on your jaw, thumb brushing your cheek. there’s something both unsure and intense in his touch — like he’s scared he’ll mess it up, but even more scared to stop.

you pull back just enough to breathe, your lips swollen and your eyes glazed with heat.

“not so pure now, huh?” you murmur, teasing again.

he looks at you like he doesn’t know whether to kiss you or confess something bigger — but he chooses the first, crashing his mouth back onto yours with a groan that rumbles from his chest.

when you shift closer, almost climbing onto his lap, he holds you with more force than you expected. his fingers dig into your hips as if anchoring himself, as if he doesn’t want to let go.

your hand slips beneath his shirt, palm brushing his stomach, and he exhales sharply against your mouth. his lips move to your jaw, then your neck, uncertain at first… until he hears your soft gasp.

“let’s go,” you whisper in his ear, breathless, the suggestion hanging hot in the space between you.

he stiffens. “to… my place?”

you smirk. “too far.”

your hand slips into his, firm and electric.

“my apartment’s closer.”

you don’t wait for him to agree.

you just lead him out — past the pulsing music, past beomgyu still singing in his drunken stupor, past your friends who are nowhere to be seen — and into the cool night air, where soobin’s heart beats so loud he’s sure you can hear it.

he doesn’t know what’s going to happen.

but he knows he’s not stopping you.

and that he wants this — you — more than anything he's ever wanted before.

your apartment was dimly lit — soft, warm, intimate. the moment the door clicked shut behind you, it was like the air changed. soobin stood there for a second, his eyes scanning your space like he’d just stepped into another realm. then you turned to him, a teasing smile curling at your lips, and tugged him gently by the hem of his shirt.

he followed like gravity.

the first kiss happened slowly — a hesitant brush of lips that turned into something deeper. desperate. heated. you tasted of soju and strawberry gloss, and he tasted like restraint finally snapping in half. his hands found your waist, clumsy at first, then firmer, as if he was trying to memorize the shape of you with his fingers.

clothes fell off in pieces — half-forgotten in the trail from the hallway to your bed.

soobin’s eyes never left yours, even when you pulled him over you, even when your nails raked softly down his back. he asked you quietly if this was okay. you answered with a kiss that made him groan against your mouth.

and when he finally moved inside you — shaky but tender — it wasn’t perfect.

it was better.

it was real. hot. messy. and achingly good.

you guided him, whispered to him, taught him what you liked — and he listened. god, he listened. every sound you made, every arch of your back, he responded like he was being graded on it.

and if he was, he passed with flying colors.

he was intuitive. curious. attentive.

no man had ever made you feel like that.

the climax hit you like a wave crashing too fast — unexpected and all-consuming. his name fell from your lips like a secret, like a confession. and when it was over, when you lay tangled together in the silence of your room, your heart was racing not just from the sex, but from him.

you should’ve felt satisfied.

instead, you felt… addicted.

the hum of the editing lab wrapped around you both like a low heartbeat. it was almost midnight, and the room had long emptied, save for the soft glow of the screen and the occasional sound of soobin typing, hesitant, as if even his fingers were overthinking.

you leaned back in your chair, eyes on the render but mind somewhere else — maybe still tangled in his sheets from last night.

“you okay?” he asked quietly, glancing sideways at you.

you nodded, absently. “just tired.”

"so..." he starts, voice low, not meeting your eyes. “last night. i didn’t mean to stay so long.”

you tilt your head, smirking. "you mean, you didn’t mean to keep me up 'til 3 am?"

his ears flush pink, but he chuckles. “well, you didn’t seem to mind.”

you lean in, your voice dropping an octave. “i didn’t.”

it was a half-truth.

you weren’t tired. you were numb.

not from exhaustion, but from the repetition — the cycle.

work. touch. release. silence.

he opened his mouth like he wanted to say something more, then stopped. instead, he scrolled through the code, pretending to focus, but his eyes kept drifting.

you noticed. of course you noticed.

you always did.

“you know,” you said, breaking the silence, “your animation loop still stutters at frame 27. i can help you clean it up later.”

he smiled — small, shy. “you don’t have to. I already owe you too much.”

you shrugged. “it’s your project, soobin. i’m just… happy to be part of it.”

another silence fell, but this one was heavier. His gaze lingered on you longer now. not the way he did when you were naked and under him. this was different. softer. wanting.

you hated that look.

so you stood up, stretching slightly, letting your shirt ride up just enough to tease.

“i should go,” you said.

he blinked, caught off guard. “already? it’s not that late—”

“you need rest,” you cut in, grabbing your bag. "big day tomorrow.”

he hesitated. “can i… can i come over?”

you turned to him slowly, a small smirk tugging at your lips.

“do you want to?”

his ears flushed. he looked down at his hands. “you know i do.”

you stepped closer, just enough to feel the warmth of his breath. “then say it.”

soobin looked up, meeting your eyes. there was something fragile in his expression — hope, maybe. longing.

but you didn’t let it bloom.

you leaned in, brushing your lips against his, soft and fleeting. a kiss with no promise.

no future.

“i’ll text you,” you whispered. “if i feel like it.”

then you turned and left, the door clicking softly behind you.

it was past 1:30 a.m. when you heard the soft knock at your door.

three short taps. hesitant. familiar.

you were in bed, hair loose, wearing nothing but an old oversized tee and underwear, your laptop glowing softly with a paused movie. for a second, you thought you were imagining it. but then it came again — one more knock. you got up slowly, half-annoyed, half-curious.

when you opened the door, there he was.

choi soobin. hoodie slightly damp from the drizzle outside. his glasses fogged up. eyes wide, like he didn’t plan on actually doing this until he did.

you leaned against the frame, arms crossed, eyebrows raised. “couldn’t sleep?”

he looked down, hands stuffed deep into his pockets.

“i couldn’t stop thinking about you,” he admitted quietly. “i didn’t want to wait for a text.”

your lips curled slightly. “bold tonight, aren’t you?”

he gave a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “can i come in?”

you stepped aside, not saying a word. he brushed past you, and you closed the door behind him with a click that sounded like permission.

as soon as he turned around, you pressed him against the wall, your hands sliding under his hoodie. he gasped softly, but his hands found your waist like instinct.

“i wasn’t sure you’d come,” you murmured against his jaw, lips ghosting over his skin.

“i told you i would if you asked,” he whispered, already breathless.

“i didn’t ask.”

“you didn’t have to.”

you kissed him then — no teasing, no buildup. just lips crashing, hungry, messy, desperate. he kissed you like he’d been starving for it, like he’d imagined this moment a hundred times, and now it was finally real. your fingers tangled in his hoodie, pulling it up, and he broke the kiss only to help you tug it off.

your hands roamed his chest, down to his abs — firm, warm. he wasn’t the scrawny nerd you first thought he’d be. He had strength, a body that surprised you. you tugged him down by the waistband of his sweats, eyes locked on his, voice a low whisper against his lips.

“sit back for me, soobin.”

he blinked, confused, aroused. “w–what?”

you pushed gently at his chest, guiding him to the edge of the bed. he obeyed without protest, legs parted, hands gripping the sheets.

“i want to taste you,” you said simply, dropping to your knees between his thighs.

his breath hitched. “y/n…”

you smiled up at him, slow and sinful. “relax.”

with one hand, you pulled his sweats and boxers down in a single motion, exposing him fully. He was already hard, flushed and twitching, and the sight of it made you ache.

“shit,” he whispered, covering his face with one hand. “i can’t believe this is happening.”

you leaned forward, pressing a kiss to his inner thigh, then up, up — teasing, warm, slow. he trembled under your mouth. when you finally took him in, inch by inch, his hand flew to your hair, not to push, just to hold. like he needed something to ground him.

“f–fuck, y/n—” his hips bucked slightly, but you pressed a hand to his stomach, holding him in place. your tongue swirled around him, dragging moans from his throat like music.

“you feel so good,” he groaned, head falling back. “i don’t think i’m gonna last…”

you pulled back just enough to say, “then don’t.”

then you took him deep again, your rhythm relentless, cheeks hollowing, eyes locked on his. watching him fall apart under your touch. his thighs tightened, his moans got louder, breath ragged.

“y/n— i’m— i’m gonna—”

you didn’t stop.

you stayed right there, even when his hips jerked, when he spilled into your mouth with a broken, helpless cry of your name. you swallowed, slow and deliberate, then licked your lips as you sat back on your knees, wiping the corner of your mouth with the back of your hand.

he looked down at you, completely wrecked.

“you’re gonna kill me,” he whispered, eyes still glazed.

you just smirked. “not yet.”

then you pulled him down to the bed, climbed on top, and whispered against his lips:

“soobin,” you whispered, voice low, sultry. “you gonna just stay there, or are you gonna fuck me like you mean it?”

his eyes widened, dark with desire. “i don’t wanna mess this up.”

you stepped closer, pressing his hand against the curve of your ass. “then don’t.”

That was all it took.

he grabbed your thighs and lifted you easily, like instinct, like he’d wanted to do this forever. you wrapped your legs around his waist, lips finding his again as he carried you, bumping into the walls, breathless laughter between kisses. when he laid you on the bed, his hands trembled — not from fear, but anticipation.

he knelt between your legs, pulling your panties down slowly. watching your expression. eyes flickering between your parted lips and the way you bit them.

“god, you’re beautiful,” he whispered. “i’ve never seen anything like you.”

you smirked, “then show me how much you like what you see.”

and he did.

his mouth, warm and eager, exploring your skin, your thighs, your core. It wasn’t perfect, but it was passionate. raw. messy. and so damn real. you moaned his name, fingers tangling in his hair, and when he finally slid inside you — slow, deep — he gasped like it was the first breath he’d taken in hours.

“so tight,” he groaned into your neck. “fuck—i... i love this..."

you rocked your hips against his, matching his rhythm, breath against his ear. “feel me, baby. you’re inside me now. nothing to overthink.”

his pace quickened, your bodies moving in sync, sweat slicking your skin. his name spilled from your lips, breathy and broken. he looked down at you, jaw clenched, fighting to last.

“i’m close,” he warned.

you cupped his face, kissed him deep. “then don’t hold back. cum for me.”

he did — with a soft, choked moan against your neck, his whole body trembling. and you followed soon after, your climax crashing into you like a wave, sharp and sweet and overwhelming.

you lay there for a moment, tangled in sheets and each other, chests rising and falling in sync.

but then, the moment passed.

you pulled away first.

no words. no promises. you grabbed his hoodie from the floor and tossed it to him.

“It’s late,” you said, voice flat now.

he nodded, quietly getting dressed, still catching his breath. “right. i’ll… see you tomorrow? for the project?”

you smiled faintly, eyes unreadable. “of course.”

and just like that, he left — around 3 a.m., hoodie half on, hair messy, heart heavier than he’d admit.

you lay back in bed, staring at the ceiling.

he was addictive.

but this wasn’t love.

just affection.

the next day, you were already in the media lab by noon, hair up in a clip, sipping an iced coffee like nothing happened. like you hadn’t spent half the night moaning his name into your sheets. you were scrolling through some reference animations when you heard the door creak.

he walked in — soobin, hoodie slightly rumpled, eyes darker than usual, laptop tucked under one arm like a shield.

“hey,” he said, voice low, careful.

you didn’t look up right away.

“hey,” you replied casually, then shot him a glance. “you look like you slept five minutes.”

“three,” he muttered, sitting beside you. “thanks to you.”

you smirked. “you're welcome.”

he chuckled under his breath, but the way his eyes lingered on your collarbone, on the way your fingers tapped against your straw — it wasn’t casual for him. not anymore.

“so… did you get a chance to work on that npc dialogue system?” you asked, flipping the screen toward him.

he blinked. took a second too long to switch gears. “yeah, uh—yeah. i built the first tree structure. i’ll show you.”

you leaned closer, shoulder to shoulder, like nothing. like you hadn’t had him inside you hours ago.

he shifted uncomfortably, adjusting his position, fingers suddenly awkward on the trackpad.

“you okay?” you asked, feigning innocence.

he nodded, then… hesitated. “do you… always do that?”

your brows lifted. “do what?”

he stared at the screen. “act like it didn’t happen.”

you tilted your head, biting back a grin. “did you want a commemorative plaque or something?”

soobin flushed immediately, lips pressing into a line. “no. just—forget it.”

silence stretched for a moment. you let it.

because you were fine. it was what it was.

friends. collaborators. occasional bodies tangled in bedsheets.

no promises.

no future.

just affection when the night hit hard and the skin craved warmth.

you leaned in again, voice low and playful, barely above a whisper. “i like you better when you’re coding instead of catching feelings.”

that made him laugh — small and bitter, but still soobin.

“yeah,” he murmured, “me too.”

you sat side by side, going over the storyboard edits for soobin’s game. but his knee kept brushing against yours. your fingers kept finding excuses to linger near his. every time you spoke, he looked at your lips instead of your eyes.

a laugh. a brush of fingers when you reached for the same pen. the hum of your breathing syncing unconsciously as you leaned over his sketchpad, discussing the new character render.

but the tension was undeniable — thick, like summer air before a storm.

you shifted in your seat. soobin’s gaze followed the curve of your mouth when you smiled at something dumb he said. his knee bumped yours under the table — once, twice — and this time he didn’t move away.

your eyes locked.

he licked his lips.

you tilted your head.

“are you going to kiss me,” you whispered, “or just keep pretending you’re focused?”

soobin blinked, startled — but only for a second. his hand cupped the back of your neck, pulling you in with a hunger he rarely let slip. his mouth found yours in a kiss that was wet, desperate, a little uncoordinated, but still made your body heat like a fever.

you straddled him in the lab chair, fingers digging into his shoulders as his lips mapped your throat. he groaned quietly when your hips rolled against his. you loved how sensitive he was, how new it still felt to him.

his fingers fumbled at your waistband, and yours slipped under his hoodie, nails grazing the skin of his stomach.

and then—

his voice broke through the haze.

“i think i love you...”

time paused.

the kiss didn’t end — not completely. but you stilled in his arms, lips barely touching.

he looked up at you, chest heaving. there was no mask, no hesitation in his gaze — only raw, trembling honesty.

you swallowed hard.

“someone could see us,” you murmured, pulling back slightly. your hand pressed flat against his chest. “we shouldn’t… not here.”

he nodded slowly. “right. sorry.”

but you saw the flicker in his eyes.

he knew you weren’t talking about getting caught.

and you knew… he meant every word.

soobin picked at his food, eyes blank, fingers tapping against the side of his glass.

beomgyu dropped into the seat across from him with the energy of a man who hadn’t just bombed an engineering quiz. “yo, you look like someone stepped on your graphics card.”

before soobin could reply, minah slid in beside beomgyu, planting a kiss on his cheek. “hey, babe.”

soobin blinked. “you guys are dating?”

minah giggled. “it’s recent. we met at that party a few weeks back. y/n introduced us.”

beomgyu grinned. “she’s basically the campus matchmaker.”

soobin tried to smile.

minah looked at him with a knowing softness. “she said you two are close. working together?”

“yeah,” he said, voice low. “the game project.”

“she always puts her heart into everything,” minah said, stirring her coffee. “she’s one of the kindest people i know. genuinely warm. i’ve never seen her turn anyone away.”

beomgyu smirked. “you sure that’s all it is, soobin? that game project?”

Soobin froze, caught.

minah’s smile wavered. “can i… tell you something?”

his throat tightened. “yeah.”

minah took a breath. “she dated someone last year. jung jaehyun. from the film department.”

beomgyu’s eyebrows rose. “that asshole?”

minah nodded. “he cheated on her. more than once. manipulated her too — made her feel like everything was her fault. she loved him so much, and he treated her like she was disposable. it took her almost a year to recover. she still isn’t fully herself.”

soobin felt the blood drain from his face.

“she stopped believing in love,” minah whispered. “she’s terrified of it now. of letting someone in. that’s why she pushes people away when it gets too real.”

suddenly everything made sense.

the kiss that ended too soon.

the soft panic in your eyes when he said those words.

the coldness in your voice that didn’t match your trembling fingers.

you were afraid.

not of him — but of what he made you feel.

the soft hum of the bustling street outside the café filled your ears as you stepped out into the cool evening air. you hadn’t expected to see soobin again so soon after that moment in the lab — after everything.

but there he was, standing a few feet away on the sidewalk, looking lost in thought, as if he had been waiting for something… or someone. the moment you saw him, your heart did something unexpected. It skipped, then raced. the last few hours replayed in your mind like a movie — the confession, the words you couldn’t quite process, and the tension that clung between you two.

it felt as if the air around you was thick, but in a way that made it harder to breathe, harder to stay composed. you didn’t know what to expect. but you couldn’t walk away now. not after what had happened. you hesitated, then took a step toward him, the streets buzzing around you as you made your way through the crowd. and when he turned to face you, his eyes met yours, searching. they held something — hope, maybe.

but beneath that, a vulnerability, something you’d never seen in him before. “soobin,” you said softly, just to break the silence that seemed to hang in the air. his lips parted as he spoke your name, but before he could say anything else, he took a step closer.

“i didn’t expect to see you here,” he said with a small smile, his voice a little breathless. you stood there, unsure of what to say next. the weight of your emotions was too much to voice. you’d been trying to keep your distance, but everything you’d told him in the lab — everything that had been left unspoken, was still so fresh. "y/n," he began, his tone softer than before, as if he was carefully choosing his words. "i heard something earlier... from minah. about you and jaehyun."

you froze for a moment, your heart dropping to your stomach. you hadn’t expected this, not now, not after everything. the mention of jaehyun's name immediately brought a rush of old memories — the good and the painful.

soobin noticed your reaction, his expression filled with concern. he continued, his voice quiet but sincere. “she... she told me about your past with him. how he hurt you. how you’ve been carrying that pain for a long time.”

the words hit you like a cold wave, and you immediately felt the familiar wall go up inside you. the one you had built after jaehyun shattered your trust. you tried to keep your composure, but it was hard to suppress the hurt that resurfaced in an instant.

"i didn’t mean for anyone to know," you said softly, voice barely above a whisper.

soobin stepped closer, his gaze steady but filled with empathy. "y/n, i... i didn’t know. but hearing that from her, i just want you to know that i’m not like him. i’m not going to hurt you. i care about you."

it was like everything about him had a magnetic pull on you, drawing you in. but what was it? you wanted to understand it, but you weren’t sure you were ready for that yet. you had never really thought about falling for someone again — not after what jaehyun did to you. but soobin? he was different.

from the moment you met him, something in you had clicked. his presence, his voice, the way he made everything seem lighter. it had been almost a shift in your routine. the days had become brighter, the moments when you found him beside you felt full of a warmth you hadn’t realized you’d been craving. and, just like that, your feelings for him had grown, but slowly. subtly. almost like an invisible thread that tied you to him.

and now, standing here, you realized that in the short time you’d known him, everything had changed. your world had shifted, in the best way possible. you couldn’t even remember what life was like before him anymore. the routine of school, the small annoyances that once felt like mountains, they didn’t matter anymore when you were around him. soobin made everything feel like it could be okay, like things could be light again. he made you smile without trying, made you laugh just with the way he looked at you, or the way he spoke to you. and as your heart raced now, looking at him, you realized it had been him all along, ever since that first encounter.

he took a slow step toward you, his eyes full of something sincere. “i never expected to meet someone like you,” he said. “you… you’ve made things so much better. i wasn’t sure how to say this before, but now, i have to tell you. i’m really glad i met you.” your heart skipped a beat. the words, his honesty, made your chest tighten.

"i am too," you whispered. "but i’m just... scared. you know?" he paused, looking at you with understanding.

“scared of what?” he asked gently.

"scared that i’m not ready for this," you admitted, trying to keep your voice steady. "scared of... falling for someone again. what if i screw it up? what if i can’t do this? i don’t want to hurt you, soobin."

soobin stepped closer, so close that you could feel the heat radiating from him. his voice was barely above a whisper.

"y/n... i'm not going anywhere. i’m here for you. whatever this is… i’ll be here, for as long as you’ll have me." you felt like you were losing control of everything inside of you. his words, his sincerity, the feeling of being cared for in a way you hadn’t felt in so long, it made your heart ache in the best possible way.

you looked up at him, meeting his eyes, and for the first time, you felt a flicker of hope. but then the fear crept back in. the fear that maybe you weren’t ready to trust again, that maybe you weren’t worthy of someone’s love, especially not someone as kind as soobin.

"why does it have to be so hard?" you whispered, almost to yourself.

soobin squeezed your hand, his voice steady and calm. "because it’s worth it. if we give it a chance. if you give me a chance."

you didn’t know what to say. the vulnerability that you felt in this moment was overwhelming, but you also realized something. soobin wasn’t asking for perfection from you. he was asking for honesty, for a chance to show you that he wasn’t like jaehyun.

and despite all the fear, despite the scars left by the past, you wanted to believe him. you wanted to believe that maybe, just maybe, things could be different.

soobin and you walk into your apartment, the door clicking shut behind you like sealing a secret. neither of you speaks—there’s no need. the electricity between you crackles in the silence, heavy with all the things you’ve both wanted to say but instead chose to show.

soobin shrugs off his hoodie in one smooth motion, and underneath, the fitted polo clings to his arms, hugging every inch of muscle you’ve fantasized about. your eyes drag over him, slow and hungry, and he catches your gaze, a smirk twitching on his lips.

“come here,” he murmurs, voice thick with intent.

you don’t even make it to the bedroom before his hands are on your waist, his mouth crushing into yours with a hunger that steals the breath right out of you. you melt into him, fingers gripping the fabric over his chest, feeling the steady thrum of his heart pounding like it wants to break free.

the kiss deepens, lips sliding, teeth nipping, tongues meeting with desperation. he backs you into the wall, grinding his hips into yours just enough to make you gasp. one of his hands travels under your shirt, grazing the soft skin of your waist, while the other cups your jaw to tilt your face and devour your mouth deeper. you moan into the kiss, your knees going weak, and he catches you like he was waiting for it.

“you feel so good,” he breathes into your neck, licking and sucking at the skin there, leaving you marked—claimed. “you drive me fucking insane.”

by the time you reach the bed, your shirt is gone, your bra unclasped, and soobin's hands are everywhere—greedy, but still careful. he kisses down your chest, slow and savoring, like he’s worshipping you with his mouth. then his fingers slip under the waistband of your panties, finding you already soaked.

“fuck,” he groans, voice rough, eyes hooded as he pulls them down. “look at you. so wet for me already. you want this?”

“god, yes,” you whisper, breath trembling.

he slides a finger inside you, slow at first—testing. then a second joins, curling just right, hitting that perfect spot that makes you whimper and arch into him. he watches you like you’re his favorite sin, completely mesmerized by how you fall apart under his touch.

your moans get louder, higher, your body trembling as he picks up the pace, his thumb circling your clit with expert pressure. he kisses your thigh, murmuring praises between each stroke—how beautiful you look, how tight and perfect you feel, how he could stay between your legs forever.

when your climax crashes into you, it’s sudden and overwhelming. Your walls clench around his fingers as you cry out, your hips jerking and your thighs trembling. he doesn’t stop until he’s milked every last spasm from your body, until you’re panting and spent and completely undone beneath him.

“shit… that was so hot,” he says, his voice low, lips brushing against your cheek as he slowly withdraws his fingers. you catch his gaze and, feeling bold, you take his hand and pull his glistening fingers into your mouth, sucking them clean while holding eye contact.

soobin lets out a broken sound—half-moan, half-growl—as he crashes his lips to yours again, desperate, messy. he pulls you into his lap, settling you on top of him, both of you half-naked and feverish with want.

your body is still humming, trembling in the aftershocks of your climax when soobin kisses you again—hungry, desperate, like he’s chasing something deeper. his hands don’t leave your body, fingers tracing over your hips, up your stomach, down between your thighs again.

you whimper when he strokes you, still sensitive, but the way he looks at you—so enamored, so lost in you—makes the overstimulation morph into pleasure all over again.

“you can take it,” he murmurs, pressing soft kisses along your jaw. “you’re so fucking perfect like this… i need to feel you again.”

he doesn’t wait for an answer. his fingers glide between your folds, spreading the wetness he’s already coaxed from you. he groans low, almost a growl, as he guides himself to your entrance, teasing you just enough to make you whine.

then he pushes in, slow but deep, stretching you inch by inch.

a gasp leaves your lips as he bottoms out, your body molding to fit him. he shudders against you, his arms wrapping around you tight like he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he lets go.

“fuck—” his breath stutters. “you feel so good, baby… so fucking good.”

he starts moving, slow at first—rolling his hips in a steady rhythm, savoring the way your body clenches around him. His forehead rests against yours, and when you open your eyes, you find him staring at you like you’re something sacred.

that’s when his voice breaks.

“i love you,” he confesses, hands gripping your waist like a lifeline. “god, i love you so much it hurts.”

tears spill from his eyes, slipping down his cheeks before he can stop them. the rawness in his voice, the vulnerability in his touch—it makes your chest ache.

you don’t answer with words. instead, you hold his face, kissing his tears away, soothing him with soft whispers, with the warmth of your body moving in time with his.

then you shift, pushing gently on his shoulders, guiding him onto his back. he lets you take control, his lips parted in awe as you settle on top of him, sinking down onto him so slowly that he swears under his breath.

“fuck—” he gasps, head tipping back against the pillow.

you start moving, rolling your hips, riding him at your own pace, watching the way his brows knit together, how his hands grip your thighs, his lips falling open in pleasure. he looks wrecked beneath you, completely at your mercy.

“you’re such a good man, soobin,” you whisper, leaning down to press kisses along his damp cheeks. “you don’t have to hide from me. i see you… and i want you. just as you are.”

a broken sound leaves him—half-whimper, half-sob—as his hands slide up your back, pulling you closer. you keep moving, slow and deep, letting him feel everything.

his hips stutter under you, his breathing turning erratic.

“baby, i—” he cuts off with a strangled moan, his body tensing beneath you. “i can’t— i’m gonna—”

“cum with me” you whisper, kissing him deep as his release overtakes him.

soobin lets out a wrecked, breathless moan, his whole body shaking as he spills inside you. sis hands grip your waist, fingers digging into your skin as he rides out his high. his chest rises and falls in heavy gasps, eyes fluttering closed, overwhelmed and undone.

even as the tremors subside, the tears don’t stop. you brush them away with gentle fingers, pressing soft kisses over his damp cheeks, his forehead, his lips.

“you’re okay,” you murmur. “i’ve got you.”

he exhales shakily, arms wrapping around you as he pulls you against his chest, still buried inside you, still trembling. he doesn’t say anything, just holds you—like you’re his anchor, his salvation.

and you let him.

because even though you didn’t say it back, he knows.

he feels it in the way you kiss him. in the way you hold him. in the way you don’t let go.

and for now, that’s enough.

he stops, just for a second, forehead pressed to yours, his breath shaky and shallow.

“i love you,” he says, barely louder than a whisper, but it hits like thunder.

you freeze, just for a moment. your heart skips, your lips part—but you don’t say it back. not yet. instead, you kiss him. slow, deep, tender. you pour everything into that kiss—every spark, every silent yes, every beat of your heart screaming me too.

he exhales like it’s all he needed. you hold his face, thumbs brushing his cheekbones, and whisper, “you’re everything right now.”

he nods, tears brimming in his eyes.

and for the rest of the night, you show him. again and again, in every touch, every breath, every moan—you show him exactly what he means to you.

it’s more than just affection.

[illusionremember]

look i just think that Dean, eventually, would have sat Cas down in the Dean-Cave to watch Lord of the Rings with him (because they're amazing films). And they'd get to Rivendell, and Arwen would give Aragorn the Evenstar pendant and Dean would remember and be like oh shit. and that line - the "it was a gift. keep it" - that doesn't come yet for a few scenes and Dean would be sitting there sweating.

But Cas. Cas wouldn't be paying that much mind at all. Because honestly I don't know that he'd pay a terribly large amount of attention to the films at that point, not the beginning. It's charming and all, but not especially interesting. He watches most of whatever Dean asks, because Dean enjoys them and Cas wants to spend time with him. But he usually pays more attention to Dean than to whatever is on the screen. Until Dean starts acting kinda cagey and weird and then Cas starts paying more attention to the couple on screen - this ethereal immortal elf and her human warrior lover. And this question of if she would give up immortality and her people to be with her lover, that would catch his eye.

And I think that maybe Cas wouldn't really catch on at first, he'd pay attention through the Council of Elrond and nod along like ah yes, a heroic quest to stop evil, i understand why Dean likes this now. And the movies would continue and he'd pay attention, but I think Arwen would stick in his mind even though she doesn't get a lot of screen time. He doesn't say anything about the mixtape or the Evenstar but he's paying attention now and Dean is still sweating.

When Eowyn comes in Cas likes her, and he respects her, but he also seems so disappointed, because its clear that she's interested in Aragorn, and surely that's a better match, right? Like Aragorn would have more in common with a human, and she's brave and free-spirited and amazing, of course he's likely to end up with her instead. It makes sense and it makes Cas heartsick. And they'd reach that point in the films where Elrond is trying to persuade Arwen to leave, the point where she turns back, and suddenly Cas is riveted. He has to know what happens to her. He has to know if Arwen lives, if Aragorn will reciprocate Eowyn's feelings, or if Arwen and Aragorn get to be together after all.

And when she appears at Minas Tirith I think he'd burst into tears i.e. tears just pouring down his face while he stares at the screen oblivious that he's even crying. And Dean is like righteously freaked out at this point because he's watched a ton of movies with Cas and his reactions always vary, anywhere from confused disinterest to mildly engaged but he's never seen Cas so moved by a piece of film before. And Dean can't even pay attention to the end cause he's busy watching Cas. And Cas has never resonated so much with a fictional character in his life as Arwen Undómiel.

And Dean's like, still mildly concerned as the credits for RotK roll and is like "How'd you like it buddy?" and Cas is so serious and so heartfelt when he tell Dean that he loved it and thanks him for sharing it with him.

idk where things go from there i just keep envisioning this from time to time Castiel is Arwen-coded ty for coming to my tedtalk

[honeytonedhottie]

honeys it girl magazine october edition!!⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🎀

welcome back to honeys it girl magazine, this is the october catalog. get ready for the inside scoop on data that i've collected, things i've learned/started doing, and just general info like that organized in kind of a teen-magazine inspired fashion. a magazine for it girls ✨ and now please enjoy, the it girl magazine.

HOW TO HAVE THE MOST DOLLY SLUMBER PARTY EVER ;

when i think of the month of october i think of GLAMOROUS parties. and that incorporates girly slumber parties, halloween parties, a LOT of parties. SOO the kind of party that i wanted to focus on in this month's catalogue is slumber parties.

to throw a successful slumber party we first need a plan. make sure that u have refreshments, entertainment, invitations and all of that planned. if u wanna have a SUPER cute slumber party have a theme. some theme ideas can be

♡ victoria's secret (V.S. pj's, lingerie, everyone wears a V.S. robe etc)♡ 2000's ♡ movie based pajamas♡ a color scheme (black and pink is my fave)

and we can't have our girls being bored at our slumber party can we? make sure that u plan fun activities like having a fashion show (playing dress up) playing dress to impress or video games like that, baking sweet treats, karaoke, dolling each other up ETC. for refreshments you could do a snack bar or make mocktails, you could even do a milkshake station!

THE VICTORIA'S SECRET FASHION SHOW 2024 ANALYSIS ;

🧁 anok yai’s floral number (she’s literally blooming, she looks like a FLOWER. her hair is giving barbie dolll and ultimately she had my favorite look of the whole entire night. the WINGSSS, the shoes everything just goes together beautifully.)

🧁 gigi hadid (she looks like a lavender princess fairy and it looks amazing on her. but PLEASEE why the slick hair?? when i think victorias secret im thinking of bouncy voluminous hair. i LOVE her wings though. they're so big and over the top and i love it)

🧁 imaan hamman (also goes with lisa and anok yai in my top three favorite looks of the night. its so simple but in my opinion her look gives the victorias secret that we all know and love the most.)

🧁 alex consani (i rly rly love baby blue on her, again, please bring back bouncy voluminous hair. and i kinda wish they gave her fluffier wings.)

🧁 lisa’s black lacy number (def one of my favorites on the whole runway. i wish she had black lacy wings instead of the structured ones but easily one of my favorites)

🧁 maty fall (the silk, the feathers, chefs KISS. in his case i think the minimal wings look the prettiest because her outfit is fuller, the delicate wings complement it beautifully.)

OCTOBER BODYCARE, MAKEUP AND FRAGRANCE FAVORITES ;

body care : hello kitty strawberry oat milk body balm from creme, vanilla creme brûlée body lotion from hempz (this one smells like HEAVEN), and fresh cream by philosophy. i rly loved the nyx marshmallow primer and for fragrance the soft and dreamy scent from victorias secret PINK (it just gives me so much nostalgia around this season 💗🍬)

DRESS TO IMPRESS NEW UPDATE ;

dress to impress is every hottie's favorite game, and when DTI dropped its halloween update, everyone including myself was so super STOKED about it. there are new codes and SO many new possibilities unlocked. speaking of codes…💬🎀

❤︎ CH00P1E_1S_B4CK (boots, jacket and skirt)

❤︎ UMOYAE (skater dress)

❤︎ D1ORST4R (star purse and hair bow)

❤︎ S3M_0W3N_Y4Y (axe weapon)

OCTOBER IT GIRL ACTIVITIES ;

like i said in the first section of this month's magazine, i associate october with PARTIES and ik a lot of us are going to halloween parties so i just wanted to share some rules of thumb especially if its ur first party, on how to have fun while also being safe.

make sure that u have a designated driver at all times

don't overdo it with the drinks, thats never hot

make sure u have ice cold water to sip on, on the car ride home

be careful, make sure that drinks are poured in front of u or you get them yourself

dont party by yourself GO WITH A FRIEND U TRUST AND STICK TOGETHER

and of course have fun 🍭 this year im dressing up as the white rabbit from alice in wonderland so im super excited to look cute and have fun with my friends

if partying is not ur thing there are SO many fun things that you can do this october. for example binge watching october movies, or doing fall related activities like we talked about in last month's section. some movies that i love to watch in october are

♡ jennifer's body

♡ ginger snaps

♡ scream

♡ the love witch

i dont usually watch things that are too scary which is why my list is so short 😭 i get scared rly easily so i try and watch movies that aren't SO scary but if you like that there are some rly good ones out there.

WHATS MY HOROSCOPE? (OCTOBER 27-31)

♡ for virgo, the libra solar eclipse on october 2 brings an unexpected opportunity to your financial realm and a boost of confidence as it allows you to showcase your talents. a surprising gift of abundance arrives! jupiter stations retrograde in gemini on the ninth, prompting you to review your long-term goals over the next five months.

♡ for aries, on october 2, the libra solar eclipse brings change to your relationships. unstable connections will be tested while authentic bonds will be strengthened. look for opportunities in love. jupiter stations retrograde on the ninth, traveling backward through the sign of gemini and your communication sector. between now and february 2025, you’re invited to explore the ways in which you connect with others. explore a variety of ways to express your mind. jupiter loves to facilitate growth, even when retrograde, making this a profound time to learn quickly.

♡ for taurus, the libra solar eclipse on october 2 awakens your mind, body, and soul! touching down in your sector of self-care, the eclipse offers the opportunity to embrace a new cycle of health and wellness. your skills will receive a boost. jupiter stations retrograde on the ninth in your zone of money and resources, challenging you to explore a new approach to the material world over the next five months.

♡ for gemini, on october 2, the libra solar eclipse brings change to your romantic life. an empowering new cycle begins that encourages you to embrace pleasure and distance yourself from people or situations that no longer bring authentic joy. this is a time to prioritize what truly makes you happy. jupiter stations retrograde in your sign on the ninth, urging you to reinvent yourself over the next five months.

♡ for cancer, the libra solar eclipse on october 2 lands in your zone of intuition and brings a new cycle of emotional strength. this eclipse could bring unexpected changes to your environment, so be sure to honor your comfort and security. jupiter stations retrograde in gemini and your zone of rest on the ninth, inviting you to relax over the next five months.

♡ for leo, on october 2, the libra solar eclipse activates your communication zone, setting off a new cycle of connection. unexpected information emerges that inspires you to action. jupiter stations retrograde in your friendship sector on the ninth. over the next five months, consider ways you can strengthen your bonds with others.

♡ for libra, on october 2, a powerful eclipse in your sign brings surprising new beginnings! personal revelations provide fresh excitement for the future. as you walk a new path, remember how powerful you are. jupiter stations retrograde in gemini on the ninth, encouraging you to learn through experience over the next five months.

♡ for scorpio, on october 2, the libra solar eclipse touches down in your zone of rest, encouraging surrender and relaxation. through soul-searching, this eclipse could bring forth a much-needed spiritual awakening. the energy is also creative and imaginative. jupiter stations retrograde in gemini on the ninth, encouraging you to embrace transformation over the next five months.

♡ for sagittarius, on october 2, the libra solar eclipse activates your zone of friendship and hope, inspiring faith for the future. expect surprising information in your social circles! an exciting new collaboration could be in the works. jupiter stations retrograde in gemini and your relationship realm on the ninth, encouraging you to explore your role in your closest connections over the next five months.

♡ for capricorn, on october 2, the libra solar eclipse awakens your career zone, encouraging you to step into your power! an unexpected opportunity to showcase your gifts emerges, and important people are noticing your strengths. surprises related to your career could open new pathways to success. jupiter stations retrograde in gemini on the ninth, prompting you to explore new self-care practices over the next five months.

♡ for aquarius, on october 2, the libra solar eclipse activates your sector of adventure, eliciting excitement! you could be taking an unexpected trip or seizing an opportunity to broaden your horizons. knowledge is power, and this eclipse could provide surprising information that helps you expand. jupiter stations retrograde in gemini on the ninth, encouraging you to explore your creative side over the next five months.

♡ for pisces, the libra solar eclipse on october 2 brings major transformation in your realm of money and intimacy! unexpected changes open new doors of opportunity, and while this is exciting, it requires you to face your shadow and abandon fear. a surprising, magical moment of abundance emerges. jupiter stations retrograde in gemini on the ninth, inviting you to rest and embrace comfort over the next five months.

[uncookedfeeler]

CITRUS I🍋

Yuna x Male Reader

Tags : 4k, light smut, incest,

Part 2

Parenting is one of life's most transformative experiences. It is a journey filled with joy, growth, challenges and the commitment to raise and guide another human being. From the moment a child is born into the world, parents find themselves on a rollercoaster ride of endless new experiences, emotional highs and lows, and unwavering love.

Parents are caregivers, teachers and coaches, constantly trying to decipher their child's needs and feelings. While the joys of parenting are many, the challenges can be daunting. From sleepless nights with a newborn to the complexities of teenage rebellion, each stage of a child's development brings its own set of hurdles.

After more than fifty years on this planet, half of them with your wife, you're lucky enough to have a 20-year-old girl as your child. From day one she has been the ray of sunshine that lights up your life. She is the person you love most and will remain your most precious treasure until your last breath. But your relationship has changed a lot over the years. Your little princess has gone from being Daddy's little girl to a gorgeous woman who has been driving a wedge between you since she was a teenager. 

This distance has increased since she became a famous idol and now lives between the dormitory and your house, although she only stays when she wants to. 

As usual, you come home from work late in the evening and enter the lock code to get into your house. Unlike before, the lights are still out and the house is deserted. You leave your keys on the hall stand and walk into the living room, closing the SAS door behind you.

You sigh as you walk through the living room to your bedroom, the room a bit messy with some of your dirty clothes from the night before still on the tripod, you sit down on your bed to remove your tie and finally free your neck, your suit disappears and you put on more relaxed clothes. At the same time, your phone rings and you see the name of one of your colleagues on the display:

"Sorry to call so late, hope I'm not disturbing you?" says a soft voice at the other end of the line.

"Not at all, Mrs Bae, I just got home, what can I do for you?" you reply, laughing.

"The CEO wants to see you in his office tomorrow, he came by earlier but you already left, he said he wants to talk about the last contract you secured". 

"Ahahah, the old man already knows it seems, ok ok, noted I'll meet him tomorrow, have a good night Ms.Bae".

"You too, Director"

You put your phone on the bed before returning to the kitchen to prepare your meal and pour yourself a well-deserved beer. With your face still in the fridge, you hear the front door open and a familiar voice echo through the room with a simple "I'm home, I'm tired! "

You immediately know who it is and reply, "Welcome my darling, good to see you home, how was your day, are you hungry?"

Without answering, you see a young woman with red hair jumping onto the sofa. 

"Yuna, please take off your shoes before entering the house, and at least take off your jacket, it's quite warm in the house," you begin to reproach your only child.

"Daddy, please don't start, I've already lost my mind today with the girls, leave me alone!" the young woman cries in obvious annoyance.

The routine is back and you make the effort to take off her shoes while she is lying on her stomach on the sofa, you notice her outfit for the day, a black leather jacket hiding a nice white t-shirt and beige trousers, so you take the opportunity to complicate your princess. 

"That's a nice outfit, darling."

"Thank you," she replies, blushing.

You put the shoes down in the hallway next to yours and see her already absorbed in her phone, so you try to get the conversation going again:

"What happened to make my little Yuna so upset?" you say.

"I'm not 13 anymore, Dad, you can call me by my first name".

"Ah ah, sorry, Yuna".

"Those bitches stole my concept for the shoot, we had to choose a fruit and we had matching colour outfits, during the pre-shoot meeting we agreed and as luck would have it today they used their "maknae shoot last" rule and took my fruit!!! "

"Please don't shout, so what happened after that?" you try to calm her down.

"What do you think, I got to the shoot and all that was left were shitty concepts, seriously, who the fuck thinks it's sexy to have a lemon in the middle of a t-shirt, they're going to laugh so hard at me for the pictures, I'm so ashamed, I left right after the shoot," she says as she stands up and faces you.

You can see the sadness in her eyes and you want to hug her and tell her that everything will be fine, but now that she's looking at you, you realise that she probably forgot to take off the famous shirt and with great regret you put a big smile on your face, almost on the verge of tears.

"No, darling, I'm sure it's a great shirt," you reply with difficulty.

"PAPA!!!, WHY ARE YOU SNIGGERING?" the young idol cries before following your eyes to her T-shirt, her face falling as she finally realises the reason, you're so sorry, but the situation is really too funny.

As you wipe your eyes you see your princess's blood red eyes, tears streaming down her cheeks and she slaps you hard in the face "I FUCKING HATE YOU, JUST FUCKING DIE YOU AND MOM" before running into her room, 

For the second time in your life you feel that pain, the pain you feel when you hurt someone you love, just like your wife did 7 years ago. 

The pain on your cheek is almost non-existent, unlike the pain in your heart. You admit that Yuna has become very withdrawn since your wife's departure, and that your clumsiness with her has hurt her before, but never to this extent.

On the one hand, your authority has been challenged once again, and for the first time she's dared to raise a hand to you. On the other hand, there is a deep sadness that hurts you, but also makes you deeply regret your actions.

You hear your daughter's cries through the door and, with a feeble step, you knock on the door before entering.

"Baby....i'm so sorry" you see her lying on her bed, her head in her pillow, her crying stops when she raises her head and looks at you, her face is turned upside down, her make-up has run down her face. Seeing your child like that tears your heart out, even though you're responsible.

"Just go, just go like Mum, you don't even like me, do you? I'm ashamed of you, go and die," she said in a cold, mean tone.

"Baby... "Hearing these words from your little princess hurts and brings tears to your eyes, so you get down on your knees to continue your apology.

"Forgive me," you tell her as your tears begin to fall, Yuna continues to reject you and her words only drive nails into your feelings, you've surely done the irreparable and you decide to get up and leave her room.

You have ruined your last family relationship with the person who meant the most to you. 

"I'll bring you dinner later, just rest," you say in an emotionless tone as you grab the door handle to leave.

Your steps towards the living room are slow and your body heavy, only to suddenly hear someone running behind you, the door slamming against the wall, and feel your sweet daughter's body against your back as she tries to wrap her arms around you.

"PLEASE, DON'T LEAVE ME SORRY," the red one cries with all her hot tears.

You drop to your knees and take your only child in your arms and hold her close, her head is under your chin as she buries herself in your neck, you stroke her head with one hand while the other pats her back, her arms struggle to wrap around your waist but she clings tightly to you.

"I'm sorry darling, I'm sorry for everything, just let it go now, Daddy's here, I won't leave you, ever"

"Daddy, I'm sorry, I love you"

"I love you too, sweetheart"

You stay like this for many minutes before you plant a loving kiss on her forehead, a sign of your unconditional love for her. She's your treasure and the most important woman in your life.

Yuna's red eyes shine into yours and the young idol plants her lips on yours, the sensation is sweet and pleasant, you are morally in a dilemma, never in a million years would you have imagined kissing your daughter like this, but on the other hand you tell yourself that she's probably had too much rejection for today and is just trying to express her love for me. 

You allow your daughter to express her desires and she wraps her arms around your neck as you hold her kiss, her tongue meets yours in a first dance, the heat in the corridor rises as her body crashes against yours, you feel her small breasts against your chest and her perfume floods your nostrils.

"Yu..na," you try to stop her, tapping her shoulder as she literally tries to eat your lips.

The young idol slowly pulls back, leaving a trickle of drool between your two mouths. You see an incredibly sexy woman, her hair a mess, her breathing heavy and hot, her hands on your chest burning and her eyes devouring you like a hungry tigress.

"The redhead doesn't know what to say when she realises what she's done, her face turning scarlet as she rests her forehead on your shoulder.

"Don't worry, it's not your fault, are you tired?

She nods as you carry her to her room and tuck her into bed, one last kiss before sending your little princess off to dreamland.

"Good night, baby," you say to her as she seems to have gone far away.

.

.

.

The night was harder than expected, and after a light dinner you went to bed with your head still full of the events of the evening, a flurry of emotions running through your body and mind, and faster than you could have imagined, the morning light appeared through your window.

It's almost 7am and you're getting ready for a long day. As soon as you wake up, your body starts to show its age and it takes you a long time to get dressed and get out of your room and into the kitchen. You decide on a quick, simple breakfast of fried egg and rice, and with this morning's appointment, you'll be ready to go in no time, having filled up on vitamins for the day despite your fatigue. As you prepare this, you hear Yuna's bedroom door open and see your daughter come into the kitchen, still wearing her white T-shirt, but her beige trousers have been replaced by blue shorts.

"Morning dad," she says shyly.

"Hi honey, no schedule today?"

"Not this morning," she replies quickly, shaking her head.

Neither of you seem comfortable with the conversation and you do your best to avoid meeting her gaze and vice versa. You discreetly exchange glances and smiles, the redhead in front of you is beautiful and you find yourself ogling her.

You continue to prepare breakfast, making sure you have enough for your daughter. The only exchange you've had since is asking her if she wants a coffee, which she refuses. You see her hovering around the table as if she wants to talk, then she finally gets up and goes behind your back to the fridge.

Then you look back over your shoulder, feel Yuna's embrace around your waist as she buries her face in your back, feel the warmth of her breath again and put your hands on hers.

"Are you all right, darling?"

"I'm sorry dad, my head has been on fire since yesterday, my body has been on fire since I saw you this morning, I just wanted to tell you that I love you very much," she answers as she places kisses on your spine.

You feel the tenderness of her lips on your skin as Yuna gently lifts your work shirt, you say nothing, letting your daughter express her feelings as Yuna's gentle attacks send electric shocks down your back.

"Please look at me," she says as she forces you to turn around, pulling you by your hips until your bottom is resting on the edge of the kitchen counter, face to face with your daughter, who is staring at you for the first time this morning.

Her eyes were trembling and she asked you in a soft, frightened voice: "Tell me you love me, Daddy", while she pressed her body against yours. You felt her soft breasts against your chest and she put her hands on the back of your neck. Your daughter brings her lips to yours, her eyes closed, waiting for you to confirm your feelings.

At this point your morality as a father is the only obstacle standing in the way of this relationship, your daughter may not realise it but it is an immoral relationship waiting to happen, your daughter is still looking for a way to fill the hole in her heart, the love of her members doesn't seem to be working for her and now she is relying on you, her father, to give her what she needs, it is a difficult choice but you are letting yourself be swallowed by the devil, your daughter's happiness is what matters.

You cupped her cheek with one hand before pressing your lips to hers as Yuna melted under the pressure of her emotions, you rediscovered the sensation of love and laid your daughter on the counter while maintaining the kiss.

Your daughter is now sitting on the worktop, the difference in height bringing her face level with yours, she grabs the back of your hair to pull you towards her, her legs wrapped around your hips, your lips still locked as your tongues meet again.

When the seal is finally broken, both your breaths are heavy and noisy, each under the hypnosis of its own pleasure, while your eyes are full of sparkles and plunge into each other's. Your princess's eyes shed small tears, which you hastily wipe away with your finger before giving her a long kiss on the forehead.

Daddy, my heart is going to explode,' she says as she takes your hand to her breast with her t-shirt, the feeling is even better than you had imagined, her small breasts are firm and pleasant to touch, as you gently knead her breasts, the young woman makes little moans that express the pleasure she is receiving.

"Yuna... do you like what Daddy is doing?"

She nods "I want to feel your hand on my skin," she replies as she takes both your hands and places them under her t-shirt, right on her breasts.

"Do you like my lemons daddy? squeeze them hard please" Yuna's sexy face and her words echo in your brain as your hands work on her juicy fruit.

The tension in the room rises and you place your mouth on her little lemon, which you have been kneading for a few minutes, you attack her nipple with your tongue while you suck, hoping to suck something, you alternate your hands, now covered with little red spots, your daughter moans with pleasure and prevents you from withdrawing.

"Daddy, suck on them, play with my little lemons that you love so much, they're yours".

All this excitement had made you hot and a knot had formed in your trousers. Your lips left her two Susson-marked mounds and now attacked her defenceless neck, licking it from bottom to top, following her carotid artery and planting long kisses under her jaw, making her tremble before she gently pushed you away.

"Dad, let me take care of you too, I've been feeling your lump on my leg for a while now".

Your daughter begins to unbuckle your belt, then your trousers, until she can finally see your underpants and cock. Then your daughter puts her hand on the front of your briefs to rub your cock, and you see her other hand go down her shorts, probably to check the state of her briefs.

"I'm soaking wet, keep playing with my tits and come and touch me down there while I take care of you".

Your daughter's hand reaches through your shorts and grabs your cock to stroke it gently, on your side you slide one of your hands up her thigh to her panties and rub her slit directly against her skin, she's wet and you can feel a small bush above her entrance, you wiggle your fingers up and down, taking the opportunity to go back and kiss your princess who moans at your actions.

Yuna's technique isn't the best, but who can blame her, the poor thing is fighting against her own body and the way she arched her back as you delicately knocked on her pussy door, freeing her lips from your kiss, the young idol expressed with volume what she was feeling,

♥Hmm....♥Ah....Papa, continue ♥Hmm, ah....♥

Your daughter's moans are like music to your ears and she quickly lets you know that her orgasm is coming as your fingers begin to penetrate her pussy from the inside, you feel little spasms running down her body and her pussy dripping with wetness, as you pull your fingers out you see the deception in her eyes before devouring her with your mouth, forcing her to let go of your cock in the process. 

Your cock is extremely hard after Yuna's work but your pleasure is not your priority as your tongue slides up and down your daughter's slit, her juices are delicious and you suck them in to capture the taste of her naughty hole in your memory. Her grip on your thin hair is powerful and she blocks your head with her legs as you finally hear the release.

"Daddy, I'm going to come, it's happening, da..." before she can finish her own sentence, stopped by her pleasure, Yuna comes all over your now wet face and falls onto her back on the worktop.

"Are you OK, sweetie?" you ask her, a little worried as she suddenly falls backwards, the pressure of her legs freeing you and you see a close-up of your daughter lying on her back in front of you, her face red and wrung out, her hair falling in the air on the other side of the table, her breasts exposed and marked by your many hickeys and her pretty pink pussy that you've just finished devouring.

You grab both her hands and pull her towards you so that she's at your full height, then you take her in your arms as if you were comforting a small child.

"You're so hard daddy, you can do it if you want to," she says with a little hesitation and tired eyes, then you notice that your cock is at the same height as her pussy.

The choice seems obvious but at the same time you don't want to take it lightly and spoil the moment, the lack of time and place is not what you want to give your princess who is offering herself to you so you shake your head in refusal then plant a long kiss on her lips.

"Not now baby, another time," you reply as you start to pull away from her, only to feel her hand holding you back.

"At least let me make you feel better, I want to make you feel better too," she says as she grabs your cock and starts to jerk it like before.

"Do you like it when I rub your naughty cock? Why does a father turn on his daughter so much?" Yuna tries to be provocative to arouse you, but the tone is off and her lack of experience is glaring, you just smile under your daughter's true words.

Your orgasm builds as Yuna experiments with your cock, trying to give you as much pleasure as possible. You put your hands on her tits again and play with them, which doesn't seem to bother her, far from it.

.

.

"Daddy?"

.

.

"Yes, sweetie?

.

.

"You know ... if you want my lemons to give you their juice, you'll have to give me yours first," she said, pointing to her pussy.

The image crosses your mind, the image of a father and daughter kissing the fruit of their forbidden love, a father giving his love to his daughter and a daughter giving birth to that love, your excitement and shame explode as your cock comes to paint the lower part of your daughter's body, her pussy and thighs marked by your essence.

I'm sorry, I'll clean you up,' you say, looking for something to wipe your cum-filled daughter with.

"It's OK, I'll do it myself,' she says as she scoops up the white liquid and brings it to her mouth.

Any young man would have been revitalised to see such a beautiful woman collecting cum on her body, but your cock is now in a less than glorious state and you pull up your trousers, taking care to get dressed.

"It's almost time darling, I have to go," you tell her as you haven't eaten or slept well, it's going to be a long day.

"Wait," she replies as she approaches you, still naked, "don't forget my goodbye kiss," as she presses her lips hard against yours, then whispers, "we'll continue tonight, I love you.

Your body and mind may be in bad shape, but knowing your princess will be there for you tonight fills your heart with a feeling you've been missing.

Later, in your car on the way to work, you get a notification that someone you're following has just started a live stream, obviously it's Yuna, she's the only one you follow, you pick up the stream on the way, but enough to hear your daughter say

My favourite fruit? mhhhhhhhhhh that's a good question, I'll go with lemon, it's a sweet fruit like me and TMI, but my dad loves lemons'.

______________________________________________________________

[oldermenfucker]

This City Holds My Heart | J. Abbot

summary: He hears you are coming back to Pittsburgh for the weekend. Maybe the reunion will wash away the pain that’s left inside him after your paths divided.

warnings: 18+ mdni! Smut, heavy angst, hurt no comfort, right people wrong time kind of thing, p in v, exes reunion, mentions of suicidal thoughts, ex!fem!reader, neurologist!reader, Jack’s prosthetic leg, reader is nondescript except that she has hair (long enough to frame her face), reader has a nickname, mentions of PTSD & trauma, widowed!Jack, sad people in love, alcohol consumption (a few drinks), protected sex, lots of tears, JACK’S POV!!! English isn’t my first language<3

word count: 10.3k+ (BEAR WITH ME OKAY)

an: HI this is my piece for A Doctor A Day challenge hosted by these amazing people [ @clubsoft @ananonymousaffair & @letsgobarbs ]! I’m so excited to know your thoughts on this piece🥹 I poured everything I could into this fic, smut, fluff, angst etc and I really want to know what you guys think!

Prompt: "I know you just landed, and I know you're probably busy, but... I'd love to see you?" + Orange

He doesn’t remember the last time he ate something; was it the banana Shen forced him to take a bite from, or the granola bar Dana shoved into his hands when she came to take the shift? Whatever, it doesn’t matter.

  Jack pushes his fists into the pockets of his cargo pants, his tired gaze moving from the edge of the rooftop to the building in front of him, watching as sunrise hits the streets of Pittsburgh slowly, crawling its way between the cars and the old bricks of the walls.

  He replays the shift in his head, trying to figure out what he missed that led to three code blues. Each case had its own story, each patient had a unique experience, and families begged him to save their loved ones, but he couldn’t. 

  He brings his fists out of his pockets, crossing his arms over his chest as he looks at the peachy sky, watching how another day starts. Some people don’t get to see this anymore, he thinks bitterly, some people don’t get to start a new day. They are stuck in yesterday while he moves forward as if nothing’s happened.

  He looks back at the edge, he takes a step closer, gazing down at the people who move around, getting ready to battle through another twenty-four hours. He wishes he was this free, to walk down a street without the responsibility of the Emergency department, without the little limp in his leg and reminder of how long it took for the soft tissue of his leg to heal.

  He has been tempted before to jump, but nowadays he does not even have the motivation to do that. He is numb and has been like this for a good six years, worse after the Pitfest casualties. That was a year ago, how time passes in the blink of an eye, like the sunrise he watches daily.

  He throws his head back, listening to the birds chirping. They made a nest a few weeks back, usually coming to their home around the time he walks to the rooftop. They have a life based on instinct, just as he does; he eats, sleeps, goes to work, and then repeats.

  Robby calls him a soulless soldier— he is just as bad as Jack, if not worse — because most of the time, there is no smile on his lips, and his tone drips with sarcasm. 

  Pittfest changed everyone, including the ER cowboys more than others. Robby broke apart with Jake’s withdrawal, and Jack… Jack tries to survive, day by day, and shift after shift. He still finds joy in little things; when he saves someone’s life by his sharp mind, when a procedure is successful, when he argues with Walsh.

  There is still an ache inside him from years ago when his wife died, and it only got worse six years ago, and now? All he is a great doctor and nothing more.

  He says nothing when he hears the familiar footsteps on the tiny rocks of the rooftop, his stethoscope moving against his chest as he shifts his weight on his good leg, sighing in relief when the tension is halfway gone from his knee.

  “Haven’t jumped off yet?” Robby leans on the railing behind Jack, looking as the sun rises slowly from behind the buildings, “Thought you’d done this time.”

  “Why? I don’t think I’ve managed to get more depressed since yesterday,” Jack replies, resting his elbows on the metal railing behind him, looking from his peripheral vision at Robby who smiles and shakes his head.

  “A trauma came in just a few minutes ago, an attempt or pushed, we don’t know but he was the same age as you. Nearly sent me to cardiac arrest,” Robby drops his head on the back of his hands, “You better not jump, you didn’t do it last year, don’t do it ever.”

  “It’s exhausting, brother,” Jack sighs, tilting his head back as the sunlight hits his face finally, the warmth of it spreading on his skin deliberately, “Coming back here, watching people lose someone they care about, calling us names because they don’t know medicine has its limits. And yet, we come back, for what? I don’t fucking know.”

  “You have me, I’m here, I’ll never leave you hanging all by yourself,” Robby nudges his forearm, looking at his face with a pleading look, “You’re pushing yourself too hard.”

  “You’re not lonely,” Jack shrugs, “You have Collins. Who do I have? Fucking Shen? I’m living in a loop, man. Every day is the same old same old. I miss my wife, I miss her, there is not a day that I wish I got the help I needed sooner, but even my therapist can’t do shit nowadays.”

  “You are being too hard on yourself, brother,” Robby straightens his back, resting his hand on Jack’s shoulder as they both look up to the sky, “Besides, I might have… some news about—“

  “Who?” Jack’s ears perk up, his posture growing rigid as he turns his head to look at Robby, “Who?”

  “Her,” Robby says with a small smile, “Your Clementine.”

  “Don’t say that stupid nickname,” Jack groans, shaking his head as he takes a step back, resting his waist against the cold metal bars, “She hated it.”

  “I think she liked it,” Robby shrugs, looking down at his shoes before he starts talking again, “There is a neurology congress tonight, and apparently a follow-up gala on Saturday night with the Head departments PTMC invited.”

  “So?” Jack tilts his head at the older doctor, scoffing when Robby raises his eyebrows at him, “You’re telling me you’re invited to a stupid gala that has nothing to do with me?”

  “For a medical genius you sure as hell are dumb,” Robby watches as Jack rolls his eyes, “I’m saying she’s coming back to the city.

  Jack’s heart drops to the bottom of his ribcage. This has to be a cruel joke, it must be. He doesn’t know how to react; be happy? Why? The last time you saw each other was to say goodbye. Be sad? He already is for ten thousand different reasons. 

  So when he looks at Robby with his eyes widened in shock, he knows that he is still deeply into something he has tried to bury for years, ever since he watched you board that plane.

  “What?” He sounds so small, like a kid lost in a playground; everything feels natural yet so off, like a distant dream turning into a nightmare in the back of his mind.

  “She has kept in touch with Dana,” Robby sighs and tightens the grip he has on Jack’s shoulder, squeezing the muscles gently to make sure Jack doesn’t get lost in his head again, “Dana told me her plane would land around… yeah, seven-thirty, eight at most. Which is now.”

  “Why are you telling me this?” Jack asks, pressing his lips into a flat line, his hands shaking as his chest begins to rise and fall faster. He rests his sweaty palms on the railings behind him, closing his fists around the cold metal.

  “I don’t know,” Robby shakes his head, staring into the distance as the sun finally rises into the blue sky, “I just thought you should know.”

  “Thanks, brother, now I won’t be able to get a lick of sleep knowing my ex is in the town,” Jack snaps, running a hand down his face as he grits his teeth, all to stop himself from tearing up.

  “I didn’t say it to—“ Robby cuts himself off with a deep breath before he pats Jack’s shoulder and takes a step back, “Take it easy, man. I’m gonna go.”

  Jack listens to Robby’s footsteps; it takes ten large steps to reach the door, and he stops Robby by the eighth one, shocking both him and his friend to his dismay.

  “Is her number still the same?”

  Jack’s voice is shaky like he doesn’t trust himself to say it loud enough for Robby to hear, but his friend does, stopping in his steps to glance back at Jack with a small smile.

  “Yeah.”

  One, two, and Robby is out of the door, leaving Jack heaving with each breath. Jack dodges the railing and steps on the safe side just to lean over the metal bars, his lips parting as he gasps for air.

  You are back to Pittsburgh, you are in the city he watched you leave, the same city you made so many memories with him in the streets and bars. The same city that he broke your heart in, the very same one you told him you couldn’t do this anymore.

  He lets out a shaky breath, reaching for his phone absentmindedly. One call wouldn’t hurt, right? It wouldn’t tear his heart and break his bones surely. People call their ex-lovers every day, why shouldn’t he?

  He opens the list of his contacts, scrolling until he sees your name with a red heart next to it; he didn’t have it in him to change the name, nor could he delete your number. 

  That is why his fingers are trembling over your phone number, trying to make up his mind before he does anything stupid. But luck is not on his side today it seems — not like it ever was — and his finger slips accidentally and presses the call button.

  “Fuck, fuck—“ he yells, putting the phone against his ear quickly, his hand going to his hip as he starts pacing the rooftop, his heartbeat racing with each beep of the line, “What am I doing?”

  He doesn’t know if he wants you to pick up the phone or not, he probably does but the thought of talking to you again after the farewell you had makes him anxious. What would he say? Hello? How are you doing? Aren’t these too cliche when you are calling your ex?

  The beeping finally stops, and he can feel his heart stopping for a second before it goes to voicemail.

  “Hi! Thank you for reaching out, please leave your message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can!” 

  Your voice… fuck, your voice is still as sweet as he remembers. He calms down instantly, a tired smile covering his face as he listens to the voicemail repeating itself. You sound so beautiful, so free as if you didn’t cry hours in his arms as he pushed you away once more, as if he never happened to you.

  After the third repeat, he remembers he can leave you a message, hoping you still have his number and he isn’t just an unknown caller.

  “Hey,” he clears his throat, running his free hand through his unruly curls, “Hey, um, this is Jack! Y’know, Jack Abbot? Yeah well urm… I heard you are back in town, yeah, Robby said something about a congress you’re attending. I know you just landed, and I know you're probably busy, but... I'd love to see you?"

  Fuck, fuck fuck fuckfuck—

  He hangs up immediately, his fingers gripping his phone so tightly he thinks it might break. What did he fucking mean he’d love to see you? He is a fucking idiot, a total moron, a dumb piece of scum, but when his phone dings a few minutes as he is near going into a full panic attack, he stops.

  “Jack, hi! I’m exhausted now, but I’d love to meet with you before my congress! Our usual cafè near The Pitt?”

  He nearly drops the phone, opening the text in the blink of an eye, rereading the message over ten thousand times to make sure it is really you. And when he opens the contact, he sees that it is true, you have texted him, accepting to meet up with him, at the cafè you usually went to after the night shifts.

  “Yes, of course. See you at 6?” 

  He presses send and starts pacing again. Waiting for a reply after six years makes him nervous to the point he thinks he might drop dead on sight.

  “See you, Jack!”

  He sighs in relief when he reads your reply, chuckling dryly as he rereads the conversation, not truly believing how he is going to meet with you again.

  He walks downstairs with flushed cheeks and a heart beating in anticipation. When Robby and Dana see him walking inside The Pitt, he rolls his eyes at them and nods when Dana raises an eyebrow at him in a silent question.

  It is going to be a crazy day for sure.

  He dresses up as best as he can; a navy blue button-up with worn-out jeans and his black sneakers. Which is so… not Jack. He feels like he has put on a persona he didn’t know he had, his walls slowly building up with each step he takes toward the location.

  He thought walking would be a good idea because now his nerves are making him sweat, his palms growing more clammy with every step he takes. 

  What will he say? Will he ask about how you have been doing? How you are doing? Do you have anyone waiting for you at home—

  The thought makes him shiver, stopping him midway to open the door of the coffee shop. He hates the idea of you with someone, he despises it, he fucking loathes it. Even the image of someone holding your hand makes his eyes tick, and his fingers shake over the glass door, but he has to pull through.

  The bell over the door dings when he steps inside, memories flooding his mind as he looks around, remembering all the exhausted morning dates after the shifts, all the cries and hushed arguments you two had here.

  Bittersweet yet wholesome. He misses the days he could hold your hand, but he gave up as soon as everything got serious.

  He rounds the corner to the spot you would always sit, and when he does, his eyes fall on you. He freezes, hands dangling on his sides as he stares at your silhouette.

  The orange hue of sunset shines through the windows on your face, your hair framing your face just as beautifully as he remembers if not more. Your hand is tucked under your chin, looking down at the marble table, tracing the shapes mindlessly.

  You are ethereal.

  Jack feels his lungs are about to collapse when you turn your head and find him standing there, and he watches how your lips stretch into a soft smile, steading yourself with your palm on the edge of the table as you stand up.

  He licks his lips and glances down for a brief moment to catch the breath you are stealing from his lungs from a few meters away. He looks up quickly, crossing the remaining distance slowly before he stands in front of you, his eyes swimming with various emotions unknown to him — is it love? Longing? Sadness? He doesn’t know.

  “Hey,” he greets you quietly, hazel eyes locking into yours as he waits with bated breath for you to say something, anything. Instead of talking, you wrap your arms around his shoulders, holding him close as you mumble a ‘Hi, Jack!’ Into his shirt.

  Hugging. You are hugging him after years of no contact. He can’t think even if he wants to. He wraps his arms around your middle, pulling you close by muscle memory, breathing in your scent as he buries his face into your hair, trying his best to not cry right here and then.

  He lets go of your waist when he feels you lose your grip on him, slowly pulling back to look at his face, and he takes his time memorizing every up and down, every corner of your face.

  He thinks of the days he used to kiss every single inch of your face when you were on rotation and he was getting ready to go to the hospital. He remembers how he used to caress your cheek when you fell asleep on his chest on his old couch during movie nights.

  He also remembers the days you tried to not let your sadness show on your face when brought up his wife again, putting the bricks of the protective wall on top of each other to shut you out.

  “Shit, sorry,” you chuckle awkwardly, pulling away and he misses the weight of you in his embrace, the warmth you provide by just existing and breathing the same air as him, “Please, sit! I know you’ll be back in The Pitt in a few hours.”

  “Yeah, urm, yeah…” he huffs a slight laugh and walks around you to pull your chair out for you, “Ladies first.”

  “Ever the gentleman,” you tease him, thanking him as he pushes your chair in when he knows you are secured and smiles at you before he walks towards his own chair and sits down, “What are you having?”

  “Well… something highly caffeinated,” he shrugs, looking down at the wedding band he is wearing—

  Fuck, he totally forgot to take it off. Did he though? Did he ever want to take it off or did he think about it but didn’t ponder over it, like a passing joke in his head?

  He looks up instantly, finding you already looking at the black ring before you tuck your hand under your chin again, meeting his eyes with a small smile before you look away and gesture for the waiter to come and take your orders.

  “Espresso it is then,” you try to break the ice he notices, but he has already started to fuck everything up again from the very first second. He covers his left hand, nodding at you with a ghost of a smile on his lips while he feels as if he is about to vomit his heart out with how insanely fast it is beating.

  “Welcome, what can I get you?”

  “A cup of tea with carrot cake and,” you look back at him, smiling before you glance back at the waiter, “A shot of espresso.”

  “Coming right up!” 

  He watches you closely — he is staring but that’s a creepy way to put it — and he nearly melts when you turn to look at him with the softest smile he has ever seen.

  “Carrot cake? Really?” Jack grins when he watches you grimace, hiding your face in your hands as you look at him from between your fingers, “Never thought I’d see the day that you will eat a carrot cake.”

  “You’re insufferable!” You chuckle, resting your chin on the heel of your palm, and he watches these micro movements with such an endearment it makes his heart clench, “It’s just a newly formed habit in the hospital. My assistant brings me tea and her very sweet orange carrot cake every evening. Who am I to say no to a home baked sweet treat?”

  “Understood,” he nods and smiles, taking a deep breath to calm himself without making a mess of himself. Your laugh is still the same, even more beautiful than he remembers and it feels so good to be there to witness it again, “How’s Boston?”

  “Oh, you know, colder than here but I enjoy it,” you explain, resting your elbows on the table as you look at him, “The bars are pretty amazing! Not that I have much time to explore them because of the hospital and applying for a fellowship. But… it’s okay, I guess.”

  “Wow, you’re thriving,” he grins, biting the inside of his cheek, “I’m so happy for you.”

  “Thank you, Jack,” you reach across the table to hold his hand — a habit you had when you were nervous, and he quickly realized his touch grounded you when you needed it the most, “Enough about me, how have you been?”

  “Same old same old—“

  “Don’t do that!” You squeeze his hand, glaring at him before your eyes soften when you notice his defeated ones, “You know I hate this phrase, Jack. Come on, tell me about The Pitt!”

  He rubs his thumb over your knuckles, running a hand over his face as he notices the waiter coming with your orders to the table.

  You pull your hand back, letting the waiter put down your cups and plate, asking if you need anything which Jack replies with a quick ‘no, thank you’ before he looks back at you.

  “I’m sure Dana is keeping you updated—“

  “I want you to tell me,” you cut him off with a soft frown he knows so well, you always gave him this expression when you knew he was dodging the question poorly, “How’s Robby?”

  “He is great,” he shakes his head and chuckles, briefly thinking about how his friend has gotten his life together before he focuses on you again, “He is in a relationship with one of the new attendees, Heather Collins. I don’t know if you know her…”

  “Dana said something about Robby dating a resident after I left but that’s it,” you reply, taking a sip of your tea, “But please tell him I’m so happy for him. He went through a lot and deserves to have an amazing life.”

  “Will do,” he nods, drowning all the espresso shot in one move, kissing his teeth as he looks back at his ring again.

  “Take it easy, soldier,” you push the carrot cake plate towards him slowly, handing him a fork to eat something sweet, “How are you doing, Jack?”

  “Me?” He chuckles dryly, trying to come up with a sarcastic reply but when he sees how worried you look for him, “I’m fine.”

  “That’s it? Six years and you don’t have anything to tell me about?” You press the matter, giving him a teasing look but he has none of it.

  “We had a mass casualty last year, Robby lost his stepson because he couldn’t save Jake’s girlfriend—“

  “That’s Robby’s story to tell, I’m interested to know—“

  “Know about me?” He looks at you as if you have hung the stars, as if every moment he spends looking at your face illuminated by the dark fading orange light of sunset doesn’t make his heart stop, “Well, I go to the rooftop every day thinking I might jump this time, and when I look down I feel numb, maybe the therapy is working because I can’t do it. I see my wife in my sleep, I imagine the life I could have had with her.”

  You take a deep breath at the mention of his late wife — or wife as he always calls her — you take two large sips of your hot tea and he mentally face palms himself at rambling all these shitty thoughts to you. 

  “You still go up?” You ask, your voice small and trembling, thinking of all the kisses and fights you shared on that damned rooftop.

  “Yeah,” he looks out of the window, his eyes filling with tears before he wipes them quickly, enjoying the cold sensation of his ring over his heated eyelids, “It’s the only place that isn’t corrupted by death.”

  “Cut it some slack, our first kiss was on that rooftop,” you reach for his hands again, and he hates how easily he calms down from such a soft touch, “I don’t think I can ever forget it.”

  “Well, it wasn’t an easy trauma, the patient died before we could get our hands on him,” he squeezes your hands, “And you were so mad at me for not letting you go for the fourth round of epi.”

  “You had to shut me up somehow,” you laugh, looking down at your joined hands, “Fuck, I was so immature back then.”

  “No, you weren’t,” he caresses the soft skin of your wrist, his hazel eyes locking into yours with sincerity, “You were hopeful.”

  “Which was horrible for emergency medicine,” you shrug, “I still am, though. That’s why neurology was a great choice. It has death, I still feel the panic sometimes, but they don’t die while I’m operating on them. It’s such a dick thing to say but… I’m glad I’m not there to witness it.”

  “I get it,” he takes a deep breath, his eyes moving slowly from your hands up to your neck and face, falling over your lips, “That’s why the rooftop visits exist.”

  He looks down at his watch before he finds the courage to look into your eyes again, seeing how it is time to go back home and put his scrubs on. 

  Jack doesn’t wanna go, he doesn’t wanna leave. He wishes he could stay in this very moment, just in this picture pretending everything is fine and you are back, that he can delude himself into believing he has you back in his arms for an eternity.

  “I totally forgot, my congress starts at eight,” you pull your hands away from him, leaving his palms cold and itchy without yours in them, and he slowly drags his forearms back to his side, standing up to say the word he hates so much again.

  “Are you… are you leaving?” 

  “Yeah, I have to…” you pout, and it takes everything in him not to reach out and kiss you until the pout is turned into a grin, “But there is a gala tomorrow night. Fundraising and everything, I’d be in town.”

  “Yeah, cool,” he nods, forcing out a smile, standing up after you and waiting for you to say something, anything…

  “Will I see you there?”

  Yes. Yes. He can make it work. Say yes—

  “No, I don’t think so,” he curses himself in his head, fisting his hands, nails digging into his palms, “I’m not invited.”

  “Oh,” you say, eyes widening as if you have heard the most devastating news ever, fingers rolling the band of your purse as you gaze into his eyes, “Well then… this is goodbye I guess.”

  “Yeah, yeah—“ he gasps when you wrap your arms around his shoulders for the second time in six years again, holding him close for one last time before he wraps his large arms around your back as well, “I’m gonna miss you.”

  “Me too, Jack,” he nearly drops on his knees when he hears you say his name with tears stinging your eyes, “Me too.”

  “Goodbye.”

  He watches you with red eyes as you try to hold back a sob before you reach for your purse to pull out your wallet and pay for the drinks, but he stops you with a hand on your cheek.

  “I’ve got it,” it pains him that he cannot lean down and kiss you when you nod and scrunch up your nose in order to keep the tears from streaming down your face, “You’ll be late.”

  You move forward, pecking his cheek slowly, and he marvels at how soft your lips feel against his stubble, and he hopes whoever gets to feel your lips back in Boston worships you the way you deserve — the way he wanted to do but fucked it all up.

  He watches you leave, for the second time, and it ruins him, making a tornado inside him that wrecks the remaining parts of his sanity. You are okay, you are happy, and that is all that matters.

  He inhales sharply before he reaches for his phone, opening his text messages with Robby before he sends a quick text.

  “Will you go to tomorrow's gala?”

  It has been years since anyone had seen Jack in a fucking tuxedo. He thinks the last time he tried one was for his wedding, and after that, he dropped the thousand dollar fabric in the trash.

  But now? He is wearing one, with a white shirt under his black coat and a simple black tie he is trying so hard to fix. He looks in the mirror one last time, running a hand in his hair before he moves out of the bathroom, following the sound of music until he reaches the entrance of the hall.

  He feels out of place immediately. It’s not him who is supposed to be here, it’s Robby, but he can’t lose his last chance of seeing you again. So here he is, grabbing a glass of champagne as the waiter walks past him, drowning the sparkling liquor like water.

  He scans the hall, not finding you anywhere as he moves between people until he reaches the bar, ordering a Double Black Label neat while his eyes wander from one woman to another in hopes of finding you somewhere among them.

  He sips on his whiskey, leaning on his elbows on the barstool as he watches the doctors and CEOs get together in various groups. It is a ridiculous shit show, some people go to the podium to give their speech, some linger and chat, and it seems the only person he is interested in is nowhere in sight.

  He shifts his weight off his prosthetic leg, sitting on the barstool only to stare into the glass he has in hand, swirling the liquid with gentle moves of his wrist.

  It is still too far from him, but he can hear your laughter from a mile away. His ears perk up, and he almost breaks his neck when he turns around abruptly to catch you walking with a couple next to you, conversing casually before you spot him through the crowd.

  He stands up instantly, nearly losing his balance when he sees you are coming towards him, hearing a soft ‘I would like to introduce you to someone’ before you lead the couple to where he is standing.

  “This is Dr. Jack Abbot from PTMC,” he nods, smiling politely at the couple who introduce themselves as well, shaking his hand before the three of them look back at you, “I used to be his resident before I changed to Neurology.”

  Jack’s hand finds the small of your back as he talks with the couple, finding out about their specialty and where they work, how they know you, and how proud they are to be represented by you in this gala.

  “Well, we will take our leave for now,” The male doctor says, shaking Jack’s hand before he shakes yours, his wife doing the same before she pulls you in for a quick hug, and the two of you watch as they walk away.

  “Hey, stranger,” you turn to him, beaming at him when he smiles back, your hands coming up to rest on his chest, “Fancy seeing you here.”

  “I had to see you again,” he mumbles, his hands caressing a path from your wrist to your shoulders, feeling the bare skin of your arms and skimping down to your sides, resting over your hips with a gentle squeeze, “It didn’t settle right when we said goodbye yesterday.”

  “It will never settle right, Jack,” you look away from his intense gaze, chuckling when you notice his crooked tie, “You still haven’t learned how to do your tie, or you left it like this on purpose?”

  “Little bit of both,” he shrugs innocently, his eyes taking in your face; you are so close he can smell the champagne mixing with your perfume, your soft lashes kissing your undereye when you blink, your lips painted in a nude shade of pink, and your hair falls around your face like a curtain leading to the hanging Gardens of Babylon — you look like a goddess compared to him.

  “Good thing you have the right person to take care of you,” you whisper, eyes glinting playfully as you pull on his tie to redo it correctly. 

  Jack relishes the feeling of your touch on his collar. He feels as if his senses have heightened somehow because he swears he can literally feel every movement of your fingers on his skin through his clothes.

  He looks down at your dress, watching as the classy design clings to your body just the right way, showing off your curves and shoulders in the most perfect way.

  “You look so beautiful,” he breathes out, letting his hands wander over your back, knowing quite well that he is crossing an invisible line, but he doesn’t care now, you are here, back in his arms, exes or not he has the chance to have you all to himself tonight if you take him back for just a few hours.

  “Thank you,” he leans down to kiss your forehead when he notices how flustered you get, but his demeanor grows closed off when he notices a man making his way towards you, stepping next to you before he extends his hand.

  “Would you do me the honor and dance with me?” 

  You pull back from Jack a little, mouth agape as you look between the man and Jack, but with a little squeeze of his hand on your waist, you give him an apologetic smile before taking up the man’s offer and resting your hand in his palm.

  “Of course.”

  Jack watches from his spot how the man leads you to the dance floor as other people pair up and join you there, the band starts playing the music and to his dismay, he has to be subjected to the sight of another man twirling you around the hall.

  Even if he is seething in his seat, he can’t deny how elegant you look with your dress flowing behind you and that smile you give your partner… this smile makes his pulse quicken, a warm blush covering the tip of his nose and cheeks. 

  He watches as the man lies his hand on your waist, pulling you a bit closer, and it makes his blood boil even though he knows he has no claim over you. You are not his lover, not his girlfriend, hell you are not even his resident anymore.

  He can’t take it anymore, so as soon as the song ends he drowns the rest of his whiskey and strides towards you, clearing his throat to catch your attention.

  “May I have your next dance?” Jack asks, his heart hammering against his ribs as he waits for you to accept his offer, and you do, with a bright smile that lights up his world.

  “Yes, you may,” you turn around to the man you danced with earlier, “Excuse me, please.”

  Jack tucks you close to him when a new song starts, his hand moving from your shoulders to your hip, the other one holding your smaller hand in his as he sways both of you gently to the rhythm of the music.

  “Did I tell you how beautiful you look tonight?” He leans down to whisper in your ear, smirking when your hand wanders up to his shoulder, cupping the side of his neck gently.

  “Once or twice,” you chuckle, dropping your forehead on his shoulder as he leans down to breathe in your scent, holding you close until the thoughts of you ever leaving again fade away for a few hours at least, “Aren’t you supposed to be at The Pitt?”

  “They don’t need me there,” he says, putting a distance between the two of you to hold your joined hands up so you can twirl before he pulls you in a bit roughly, keeping your chest pressed into his.

  “And you thought you were needed here?” You ask, batting your eyelashes at him as his smirk widens, his band on your waist moving to your hip to squeeze you in response.

  “Am I not?” He feigns innocence, his tone matching yours playfully, “I could leave now if that’s what you want—“

  “I never said you weren’t needed,” you don’t break eye contact, and it thrills him as if it was six years ago when you danced for the first time at Dana’s wedding anniversary, “But I know a place if you wanna leave…?”

  “Tempting, very tempting,” he brings your hand to his lips, pressing feather light kisses all over your knuckles, “Are you suggesting?”

  “It might be the few champagne glasses I had but,” you break away from his grip, interweaving your fingers with his as you tug on his hand gently, “My room is on the twentieth floor if you are interested…”

  “Lead the way.”

  Your journey to your room is uneventful; you don’t have a chance to do anything because you are never alone. Not in the hallway he wanted to press you against the wall, not in the elevator bunch of people jumped into when the doors were about to close, not even as you walked on the floor because one of the doctors’ rooms was also on the same fucking lane.

  He is trying to act unbothered as you fumble with the key card, trying to open the door while Jack has his hands roaming your back absentmindedly, his touch trembling slightly in excitement.

  He is going to have you again, after all this time, he is going to hold you as if you are his again.

  You push the door open and tug Jack in by his tie, crashing your mouth into his as you press him against the closed door. He gasps into your mouth before he closes his eyes and kisses you back, one of his hands coming up to grab the back of your neck, pulling you closer until there is no space between you.

  You taste like Moet and cherry lip gloss with a hint of Vanilla in your perfume, and your hands feel warm and welcoming, anchoring him to reality because his life had no purpose before this very moment.

  You ground him, just as you have always done, with subtle kisses and tugs and a hidden hunger slowly pouring into your touch. He feels it all; the small skip of your fingers over his tux as they reach to undo the tie, the quiver of your bottom lip as they chase his chapped ones.

  Jack’s entire world has faded, and all he can see is you.

  He guides you further inside the room with slow deliberate steps, careful not to hit something and hurt you in the process. You break the kiss when you reach the edge of the bed, gasping for air before you push him down on the mattress gently.

  He sits without a fuss, his pupils blown out as he watches you take off your heels and slowly straddle his lap, pushing his coat and tie off slowly. Jack doesn’t blink, he is afraid of even missing one second of tonight. He wants to remember this forever in case…

  No. He shouldn’t go there now, he has you and that is all that matters.

  Jack’s hand comes up to your face, gently caressing your cheek, his thumb going over to your lips as he traces the edge of them while you work on his buttons, finally taking in the sight of his chest.

  He is so mesmerized by the look of pure affection you have that he doesn’t notice you have got him half naked already until you grab his hands and move them to the zipper of your dress.

  “What are we doing?” He bumps his nose into you as he asks, leaning forward to unzip your dress. Your hands roam his naked torso, fingers tracing the soft grey hair on his chest before slowly moving down to his soft belly.

  “Reliving our best memories.”

  Your answer is simple yet effective, and it awakens a deep ache inside him. He understands, he truly does. Your best memories were the ones where you were tangled under his sheets, limbs resting against each other while your mouths left soft traces of love on each other’s skins.

  It might not be the best thing to do with your ex, after six years of no contact, but Jack takes what he can because if he doesn’t, he will lose himself forever.

  You are the last string that attaches him to this life.

  His lips find your shoulders as soon as he pushes the straps of the dress down, kissing the hallow part of your shoulder above your collarbone, sucking in a red mark on the thin skin before he moves upward to your neck, licking your pulse point as he drags his tongue to your jaw.

  You whimper, you fucking whimper, and it makes his head spin with an intensity he had no idea he possessed.  He kisses a path to your lips, breathing your soft breaths while he pushes down the neckline of your dress, pulling back from your mouth only for his gaze to drop down to your chest, breasts covered with a thin strapless bra.

  His brain short circuits when you roll your hips down, grinding against the very painful bulge in his dress pants. His lips part as he huffs out in shock, totally forgetting about his not-so-little problem while he was tasting you.

  “I need you,” he whines, cupping your face in his large palms as he stares into your eyes, “I need you so bad. Please let me have you, please let me pretend I didn’t lose you just for a few hours.”

  “You have me, Jack,” you raise your hands to rest them on top of his, leaning your forehead against, “I need you too.”

  He nods immediately and takes his shirt off completely, watching as you stand up to drop your dress next to your shoes, and for the first time in years, his jaw nearly hits the floor when he finally takes in the sight of your body.

  “Fuck,” it’s a slow gasp, but you hear it perfectly, grinning before you dart toward the hotel’s bathroom, coming out with the pack of condoms in hand. He barks out a laugh when he sees what you are holding, “I’m not that young, we certainly don’t need a whole pack—“

  “Have some faith in yourself, old man,” you grin and watch as he raises his hips and takes his pants and briefs off, his prosthetic leg catching the light of the room. You move to stand in front of his greedy eyes, glancing at his leg before he guides you back onto his lap, “Does it hurt?”

  “No, not right now,” he mutters but it soon turns out into a deep throaty groan when you wrap your fingers around his cock, gently stroking him while you bring the condom to your mouth, tearing it open with your teeth, “That has to be the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

  “Ready?” You peck his lips, rolling the condom on his cock until it reaches the base, “Cause I can’t wait any longer.”

  “Me neither,” he pushes your panties to the side, swiping his fingers through your folds, dropping his head on your chest when he feels how wet you are, “You are soaked, baby.”

  “All for you,” you whisper as you line his tip with your entrance, slowly lowering yourself as the fat tip breaches your walls, both of you moaning at the contact. 

  He forgot how warm you were, how world-consuming your body felt, but now that he is feeling it all again, he remembers the nights he lost himself in the sensation of your cunt wrapped around him.

  “You’re so big,” you wrap your arms around his shoulders, nails digging into his back as you finally take all of him inside you, “Fuck, I forgot how good you feel.”

  He can’t form a coherent word without looking like he is having a stroke, because fucking hell he might be having one just now. Your cunt is stretched around his cock, and he can feel your pulse around his girth even through the condom.

  “Jack,” you whimper his name, grabbing his jaw so you can look into his eyes as you slowly move your hips in circles. He is pretty sure he already looks so fucked out with his lips ajar and eyes glassy with desire while he has to focus on your face so he doesn’t come too fast and embarrass himself.

  He reaches around you to unclasp your bra without looking away, short breaths falling from his lips as you begin to move up and down, and he successfully manages to get that thing off you before latching his lips to your nipples.

  He closes his eyes and groans when he feels your walls clenching around him as soon as he swirls his tongue around the tightened bud, his hands moving to grab the back of your thighs to help you move faster.

  He is so close, embarrassingly so, because he has been imagining this for so long. Jack clings to you as you ride him faster, the lewd sound of skin slapping against skin echoes in his head, leaving him panting and dizzy.

  He opens his eyes and finds your head thrown back as you fasten your pace, damp hair sticking to your forehead as you chase your release.

  He is hypnotized by how beautiful you look; his body glistening with sweat and thighs shaking around his hips. He watches closely how you moan loudly when his cock nudges your sweet spot deep inside your core.

  “Fuck, fuck— I’m gonna come,” he groans out the words, and you nod absentmindedly, leaning down to press your lips to his, kissing him as you grind down harder, urging him to let go.

  “Me too, baby,” you gasp against his lips, your body trembling as the knot in your stomach tightens and in a blink, it breaks, waves of euphoria rushing through your veins as you release around him.

  He hugs you close, snapping his hips up one, two, and three times before he buries his face into your neck, groaning from the depths of his throat as he empties his cum into the condom.

  He holds you as he comes, wanting to carve the memory of tonight into his head so he can remember it until his last breath.

  “Jack,” you whisper his name, running your fingers through his curly grey hair, kissing the side of his face as he tries to regain his breath, “Thank you for coming tonight.”

  “Thank you for giving me a chance,” he replies quietly, gently lowering you on the bed before he hovers over you, pulling his softened cock out of your swollen hole, “It’s been a long time…”

  “For me too,” you smile sheepishly, kissing his forehead before you sit up slowly so you can go and clean up, “I’ll go to the bathroom and order room service. What do you wanna have?”

  “Anything, I’m starving,” he smiles, flipping on his back as he watches you walk to the bathroom before he looks up at the ceiling, shuddering as it finally dawns on him what he has done. Sex. With you. After six years of radio silence. After all the arguments, after the farewell you shared at the airport, after him realizing how emotionally closed off he was — is.

  “Bathroom’s yours,” you walk back into the room, reaching for his white shirt on the floor, putting it on before you crawl on top of the bed, kissing him sweetly on the lips a few times before lying down and reaching for the phone on the nightstand.

  He turns on his side, kissing your bare thighs before he stands up and walks to the bathroom to get rid of the used condom. Jack splashes water on his face, shaking his head as he looks at his reflection in the mirror.

  Was it a mistake? Probably. But he doesn’t regret it, not now, not ever. He will forever cherish every moment he spent and will spend with you for a long time, perhaps forever.

  A deep unsettling sadness fills the pit of his stomach suddenly, and he runs a hand down his face when he remembers you will go back to Boston in a few hours. He wants to do something to keep you here, locked away from the world and its demands — just you and him.

  He cleans up quickly before the tears threaten to fill his eyes, washing his hands and wiping the sweat off his body with a damp towel while he walks to the bedroom, reaching for his briefs.

  “Greasy cheese Burger with extra fries, what do you say?” You ask, pulling back the covers on the other side so he can crawl in next to you, but before he has the chance the doorbell rings, “Let me go get it—“

  “Na uh,” he wraps an arm around your waist, pinning you to the bed before he plants a kiss on your nose, “I’ll get it, ain’t no way I’m gonna let anyone see you like this.”

  “Like what?” You sit up on your elbows, dragging your nose against his neck until you reach his lips, not kissing him just hovering while he breathes the warm air that you exhale.

  “All glowing and pretty,” your lips are practically pressed together, but still he doesn’t close the tiny remaining distance, “And in a white shirt only. No, this is mine to enjoy.”

  He smirks and pulls back, chuckling when you whine and drop back on the bed as he gets up to answer the door,  hiding his prosthetic leg as he pulls in the table before he shuts the door.

  “Oh my goodness it smells so good already!” You have moved to the edge of the bed, hands around your legs and head resting on your knees, waiting for him to bring the food to you.

  Jack’s stomach grumbles, making you giggle. He gives you a shy smile before he sits next to you, pushing the table closer to you. He watches as you dig in, taking a huge bite of your burger, moaning at the taste.

  “That good?” He asks, popping up a few fries into his mouth, nodding as the spices fill his tastebuds, “Fuck, yeah. It tastes delicious.”

  It doesn’t take long to finish your meal, but the time is filled with teasing and bantering, sharing bites, and saucy kisses while you eat. 

  What he doesn’t expect is to find himself on his side, with one arm under your head after you both finished your food. It feels… ordinary like he has done it every day, as if it is a routine. Domestic.

  “What happened to us?” He asks like a lost baby, his eyes exploring your face closely; from your lashes to your cheek, down to the soft small hairs on your jaw while he traces a path from your thumb up to your shoulder with his knuckles.

  “Many things,” you sigh, kissing his freckles on his shoulders gently, your hands on his chest as they wander, “You, me, your… your late wife.”

  You reach for his left hand that is touching your arm, pulling it to your face so you can look at the black ring he is still wearing. You twist the metal, and each circle twists his heart.

  He forgot to take it off again.

  “You were not over her back then,” you whisper, scooting closer to rest your head on the crook of his neck, “I don’t think you are now either. We just… became something so… good in a difficult time.”

  “I loved you,” he replies and hides his face in your hair, smelling your comforting scent before he resumes, “I still do. I fucked it all up. I… I wanted you for a lifetime but I wasn’t okay back then. I had lost my wife three years before we met and… and I tried, y’know? I tried to let you in, I tried to open up it just—“

  “I know, Jack, I know,” he lets the tears fall when you cradle his face, pulling him close until he is only a breath away, “I wanted to stay there and watch you heal, but you refused to seek any help, and I couldn’t watch you slip through my fingers any longer than I did.”

  “I’m sorry I ruined it all,” he sobs, tears streaming down his face. He reaches to mimic your position, cupping the side of your head, “I wish I listened, I w-wish I didn’t just… give up like a coward. It was not me, I never give up—“

  “You are not a coward, Jack, look at me,” he forces his eyes open, those bloodshot hazel orbs looking so devastatingly beautiful, “I gave up on you too. I pushed you too hard sometimes, I… I got jealous when you would bring up your wife. I was a fucking dick about it, so no, you didn’t ruin it alone. I had a hand in it too, a big one.”

  “You were in the right though,” he kisses the tears that fall on your cheeks, mumbling against your skin as another sob wrecks through his body, “We were happy together, fuck, how much of an idiot I was to bring up my dead wife when I had you. We could’ve had a future, we could’ve lived together and built a life, but I clawed on the past too hard that I was blinded.”

  “I loved you from a distance for the past six years,” you whisper, pecking his lips gently, “Boston… it felt lifeless without you in it. It’s not the city that holds my heart, it’s just a passing location in life. You made this city shine brighter in the mornings, made the coffee taste sweeter, but at the same time… nothing was truly okay here.”

  “It feels like a distant dream when you talk about it,” he shuffles downward a little until he can rest his head on your chest, “But we were in love, why didn’t it make a difference?”

  “Because love isn’t enough,” he wraps his arm around your waist, holding you tightly as he cries softly into the shirt you are wearing, “Sleep, baby, you probably haven’t had more than a few hours to rest. I’ll wake you when I have to leave.”

  He wakes up with dread even though you are kissing his head and cooing at him. You are leaving, again. He has to let go of you for the second time, and it fills him with so much agony that his leg begins to hurt.

  “Hey, honey,” you angle his head so you can plant a kiss on his lips, grinning down at him as he blinks sleepily, “You slept like a baby.”

  “How long?” He grumbles and hides his face into your stomach, “Don’t wanna get up…”

  “Me neither,” you reply, and he can hear the pure sadness in your voice, but he doesn’t make any move to get up, instead his hands go under your shirt — his technically — so he can grope your waist, “But my flight is in an hour and a half…”

  “I slept the whole night?” He ignores your last sentence, sitting up slightly, keeping his weight on his forearm next to your chest, “I’m sorry, I—“

  “Hey, don’t be sorry!” You pull him down so he hovers over you, playing with the tiny curly hair on the nape of his neck, “I loved it. It reminded me of the time when you’d fall asleep on top of me after a rough shift. It felt so good to sleep with you again.”

  “I haven’t had a good night's sleep until… until tonight,” he confesses quietly, leaning down to drop a kiss on your lips, but when he wants to deepen it, you push him away gently with your hands on his chest. He looks down at you, confused and a bit hurt, “What?”

  “Jack…” he watches you swallow the words down as best as possible, but at the end of the day, you have to utter them somehow before it is too late, “I have to go now, I’ll miss my flight.”

  “I don’t want you to go.”

  His eyes water as soon as the words fall from his lips. He truly doesn’t want you to go, he needs you here, with him, in his bed, in his clothes. He breathes better when you are with him, he can think, and he can live.

  “I don’t want to go either,” you wipe the tears that stream down your face, “But I can’t stay, not when I have a life in Boston. Maybe one day I’ll come back, hell, maybe I’ll come back for my fellowship, but… for now, I have to go.”

  “We can get you a position in PTMC, I can talk to Gloria myself—“

  “Jack,” the way you utter his name breaks his heart into a million pieces, because he knows, deep down he knows he has to let you go. He has been denying it for hours, but in the end, he knows there is no way he can keep you here.

  “I’ll drive you there then,” he moves to the edge of the bed, taking off his prosthetic as the tears fall down softly. He begins massaging his leg slowly as you get up and pack your things, still only in his white shirt and nothing more.

  You look strikingly gorgeous; hair unruly, bare thighs, puffy face from all the crying, and he thinks he has never seen something more surreal.

  “Wait,” you halt in your step when he reaches for his coat on the floor, pulling out his phone before he takes a quick photo of you.

  “What was that?” You chuckle, moving toward your luggage to drop everything you own in it while you see Jack staring at his screen, “Baby?”

  “I… I wanted to have something from you to look at later,” he explains, his voice barely above whispers, “For when I miss you.”

  You suck in a sharp breath, he hears it clearly. But you don’t turn around toward him after it, probably shocked to your core by how raw and emotional he sounds.

  After taking out the clothes you wanna wear for your departure, you walk to Jack, standing between his legs as you slowly unbutton his shirt, taking off the fabric before you hand it to him — the last thing you had touched from his belongings.

  He takes it without a word, wearing it before he puts his prosthetic leg back on, trying his best not to break apart at how his shirt now smells like you. He won’t wash this again, he would hang this behind his door so he can smell it daily before he goes to the hospital.

  You get ready in thick silence, an uncomfortable one that you both know will break ten times worse than before eventually, and that it will lead to something far too devastating than anything you have experienced.

  He grabs your luggage, hand reaching to hold yours as he guides you out of the hotel room after you check it multiple times in case you missed something. You walk together, shoulder to shoulder, ride the elevator down by your head on his chest and his arms wrapped tightly around you.

  Jack watches as you check out, smiling and thanking the receptionist before coming back to him with a tired look on your face. He knows how you must be feeling, he feels even worse than you, because suddenly it is six years ago as he watches you pack your bags and ride to the airport together.

  He drives you there himself, muscle memory he thinks bitterly, with his hand on your thigh and your fingers caressing the freckled skin. He doesn’t wanna break the bubble you are in, he doesn’t wanna believe he is seeing you go again. He can turn the wheel and drive to his place, he thinks about it too, but he knows you are not ready yet, and he isn’t ready either.

  He looks down at his wedding band shining under the sunlight. The memories of your tears over this black ring rush into his mind, and he takes a deep breath to calm his racing heart — he isn’t ready for sure.

  He wants to say something, anything as he helps you through the airport, but he can’t, he doesn’t dare to utter a word and he hopes that his actions and eyes are showing what he hopes to say.

  “Don’t go,” these are the only two words he manages to let out as you look at him, hearing how your flight’s boarding has started through the speakers, “Please don’t go.”

  “I have to, Jack—“

  “No, no you don’t have to!” He presses his lips together tightly, his cheeks flushed and eyes red, “You just- just have to stay here, with me, be my Clementine again—“

  “You still use that stupid nickname?” You give him a watery laugh, cupping his face before you press your lips to his, muffling his sobs as best as you can, feeling how your tears mix together and fall on your chins.

  “Yeah, of course,” he kisses you back quickly, like he is in a rush to win a game, an endless competition with no victory, “I know you fucking hate it—“

  “I love it, I love you,” you peck his mouth again, “But this is where we need to part ways, Jack. It’s in our faith it seems.”

  “Curel fucking faith,” he bumps his nose into yours, hands clutching your hips so tightly as if you would vanish if he loses his grip, “I love you, too.”

  “Reach out to me when you forget to put your ring on,” you step back, letting his hands fall to his sides, “Find me when you don’t need to go to that rooftop, I’ll be waiting for you, even if it takes ten or twenty years.”

  And Jack watches you leave again, the same way you did six years ago, from the same spot. He watches you take his heart to another city, leaving him with an empty aching chest for an eternity.

  The next day, he walks toward the same staircase that leads toward the rooftop while twisting his ring, but it is not his late wife he is thinking about; it’s you.

  Today may not be the day, but someday he will find you, he is sure of it.

[muffinpink02]

It’s not what you know, it’s who you know -

Hello lovelies! So this is my first “Reader POV” story. And my first Alexia Putellas story. But you can find me on ao3! Muffinpink02 With my other stories.

Summary - Your best friend has invited you to be a plus one for an award show for women’s sports. You don’t have a clue about sport, so when a certain blonde comes and flirts with you, you can’t help but flirt back. But can she keep your attention?

Sorry if I haven’t posted this right, first time on here.

Warnings : SMUT, 18+ fingering, strap, orgasm denial, cunnilingus, restraint and more. 12k +words

You were running late as usual.

Well, it was only by 5 minutes, not too late for your standard, but you knew Daisy would already know that. You were always late. It wasn’t like she cared, she was your best friend, she might tease you about your horrendous time keeping but she loved you, she wouldn’t hold it against you.

Finally, you arrived at your guys favourite pub. You hurried in to see your childhood best friend sitting by the window, drinking her classic red, and what looked like your go to choice of drink sitting on a beer mat in front of her. You smiled as you approached her, it had been a month since you last saw each other. She’d been soo busy with work lately, you was aware she was working on something big with her current clients, you wasn’t sure on who they were but it was some kind of trophy. Or was it a statue?

“Daisy!” You shouted.

She looked up from her phone, a huge smile on her face. “Well, well. Look who’s nearly on time, this is early for you!” Daisy laughed as she grabbed you in for a hug.

“Don’t jinx it!” You laughed as you sat down. You grabbed the drink in front of you. “Ahh you’re an angel. Thank you, D.”

“You’re welcome. So, tell me how’s life? What have I missed?”

You caught up on everything, you finally learned that it was an award that Daisy had been working on, something to do with women’s sport, football to be precise. You could tell from the way she spoke about it that she was excited and proud of herself, and you loved to see it, you were always her biggest cheerleader.

“So it’s being awarded next week, and I get to bring a plus one.” She eyed you up excitedly.

“I’m there. What’s the dress code?” You asked.

“Yay! Brilliant! So it’s fancy but not fancy there will be free drinks, food and a lot of fit athletes. Definitely ones you would love.”

“Sorry? Am I just a big old tart? I’m there to support you…but I mean if there will be fit girls then it’s a win, win.” You smiled at her playfully.

Daisy rolled her eyes and laughed. “Yeah, yeah. Ohh and a car will pick us up, so come to mine before and we can have some pre drinks.”

“Perfect. Tell me a time and I’ll be there. And I’ll be on time. I promise.” You winked.

——————-

You indeed kept your promise. It may have been the first time ever in your grown up life that you were actually on time, 6 minutes early in fact. You knocked on Daisy’s door and of course the pure shock on her face was worth it.

“No. You’re on time? You’re early? What?” She opened her door wider to let you in.

You walked in, a smug smile on your face. “Yeah, but don’t get used to it.”

Daisy laughed as she followed you into the kitchen, grabbing you both drinks for tonight.

“I love what you’re wearing, D.”

She poured you both Prosecco, handing you your glass. “Thank you. I normally hate dressing up like this but I actually like this dress. Let me see yours in person, it looked so nice in the picture.”

You took your jacket off, revealing a simple but chic, black cami mini dress, that showed off your curves just perfectly. The chest was low-cut, displaying a healthy amount of your breast, but not enough for it to look tacky. It had an open slit to the side of your thigh, exposing some skin, but enough to look sexy. And if you were going to toot your own horn, yeah, you would say you looked good tonight.

“Yes. I love this! I won’t be surprised if you get one of the athletes trying to talk to you. You look fucking hot!” Daisy smiled.

“Pshh I wish. But here’s hoping.” You raised your glass as you took sip. “Anyways, I’m there for you, not the girls.”

In all honesty, you wasn’t too sure on what tonight was about, you knew the award was made by Daisy but you didn’t know what it was for exactly. Well that was a lie, you knew it was for women’s sports and their achievements, but that was about it. You didn’t know what sport it was for, well again you knew Daisy’s award was for football. Was there other sports there? Maybe? You just knew Daisy was there and a woman footballer was receiving it. For her achievements? Yeah, that’s sounds right. Either way you were there to support her, and that was something you knew you could do.

The car arrived, Daisy explained there would be a few faces you might recognise, well, not the sport faces, because you had no clue when it came to sport. You didn’t watch it, you didn’t know about it, you wasn’t into it. It just wasn’t your thing. The car pulled up to the event, there was loads of people walking into a fancy looking building, paparazzi was outside taking pictures of who you assumed was the star athletes.

You and Daisy walked quickly through the crowd, she wasn’t one for pictures and fuss. Even if this was one of her biggest events she had worked on, she didn’t care for it. You both had your VIP lanyards around your neck, the bouncers allowed you entry into the main area. You both got a drink and spoke to some of Daisys colleagues, some you had even met before.

Daisy was being pulled from pillar to post, you didn’t realise just how important the award was. The footballer who was receiving it must have been a big deal as her name was constantly being mentioned. Journalist was asking Daisy ‘how she felt about tonight?’ And ‘how she designed the award?’ ‘what her inspiration was for it?’ You loved watching her finally being recognised for her talent but it did mean you were left a lot, not that you minded. You walked around the room looking at displays of other awards, and the displays of other athletes that was being awarded.

As much as you tried your best to look interested, you had to have a quick glance at your phone, you know, you could be getting an important email from work. You scrolled over your insta feed, but that was just as boring, but a video of a cat playing the piano caught your attention. You didn’t feel the presence of person next you until she spoke.

“You look as bored as I feel.”

You jumped slightly at the new voice in your ear, you looked up to see a blonde woman now standing next you, she was looking at the award you had been standing next to for the better half of ten minutes.

She continued. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” That’s when you noticed a thick Spanish accent on her.

“No, you’re okay. I was just looking at work emails.”

That’s when you really looked at the stranger, she had beautiful hazel eyes, her dark eye shadow making them pop. Her smile was painted red, with full lips. She was wearing a black fitted suit, with a low cut travelling down her chest making it look like she had nothing on underneath. Her blonde hair was parted and down. She was just a bit taller than you, making you look up at her. Basically she was fit as fuck.

“Ahh sí, work emails.”

A mischievous smile spread across her face telling you she knew you wasn’t looking at no work email. She probably saw how engulfed you were at the stupid cat video. She glanced over you quickly, making you almost feel like you were revealing a body part that you didn’t know was out.

“Are you here for work?” She asked.

“Oh, erm no, I’m here with a friend.”

Her eyebrows raised, she took a quick glance around the room. “A friend? Why are they not with you?”

“She’s working, I’m here for support. Her cheerleader on the sideline.” You smiled.

“Ahh, I see. A cheerleader, where are your, how do you say? Pom poms?” She smiled playfully at you.

“Left them at home, didn’t want to upstage her.” You smiled back, taking a drink from your glass.

She laughed at your joke, the sound of her laugh made your stomach flutter.

“It’s a shame, I think it would have made tonight a bit more fun, no?” Her smile was playful as she winked at you.

You had only been talking no more than 5 minutes and you wanted to know everything about this woman. She took a sip from her own glass, taking a confident look down your body, her eyes lingering at your chest, but unlike a man it didn’t feel creepy. It was definitely wanted. You felt your cheeks burning up at the intense way she looked over you. It almost felt like she was undressing you with her hazel eyes.

Before you did willingly undress for the gorgeous women in front of you, you thought you should at least ask a question.

“Are you here for work?”

She smiled, she took another glance over you then around the room. “Sí, for work. But I got distracted.” This time her hazel eyes lingered on your mouth.

Did it send a cold shiver up your now hot body? Yes. But she didn’t need to know that.

“Hmm, you’re not very good at your job if you can be so easily distracted.” You said teasingly. You did your own eyeing up this time, you let your eyes roam her neck line that went down her chest. Her suit made her look powerful and in charge of any situation she was in. And by the looks on her face she was more than happy.

“Hmm, I don’t normally get distracted. But sometimes it’s hard not to be. Especially when I have someone like you I can talk to.”

This woman was oozing confidence, it was almost intimidating, but the playful smile on her face made you want to kiss it off.

“So, you could say I’ve already made your night more fun? Since you were soo bored.”

She laughed again. God, that sexy laugh of hers was so captivating. She stepped a little closer into your space. “Sí, I’m definitely enjoying myself now.”

Fuck, she was honestly the most gorgeous woman you had ever laid your eyes on. She took another glance over your body for good measure. You could have sworn your saw her pupils grow.

You was about to ask for her name, but another women’s voice came in to pop your bubble.

“Ale, et necessiten per a una entrevista ràpida.”

Your GCSE Spanish wasn’t able to translate what she said.

“Estic venint.” The blonde smiled at her Spanish friend. You didn’t think she could be any sexier until you heard her speak in her mother tongue. She looked at you, clearly seeing your confused but turned on expression.

“I have to go, you’ll be at the after party sí?”

You felt giddy, the women clearly wanted to know you as much as you did her.

“Yeah, I’ll be there. Might bring my pompoms.” You winked.

Her head tilted back as she laughed. “I can’t wait. Adéu, nena bonica.” She looked over you once more as she walked away with the other Spanish lady. You watched them walk out of them room, into the unknown.

You wasn’t sure what she said but you definitely liked it. You suddenly felt sad at the loss of the mystery woman. You looked around the room for Daisy, she was already looking at you from across the room, a massive smile on her face. She waved for you to come over.

You made your trip over to her, the smile on her face only got wider. You spoke before she could. “Sorry, got completely distracted. How’s it all going?”

Daisy looked at you, a weird expression on her face. “No, you’re good, was you having fun with your new friend?” She looked giddy.

“Erm, yeah I mean she was fucking hot. Did you see her?”

“Yeah, I saw. I didn’t want to interrupt.” She smiled, but her smile was weird. “Did you get her name?”

“No. I think her friend said it, but it was quick Spanish. Are we going to the drinks after?” You asked.

Daisy laughed, almost in disbelief. What was so funny?

“Yeah, we are. Did your friend ask if you were going?”

You smiled, almost bashful. “She did, but I’m here for you, an-“

Daisy put her hand up to your face, stopping you mid sentence. “Please understand I would never get in the way of you having a good time.” She chuckled. “I’ve watched you turn down plenty of girls on our nights out, just because it was our girls night.” She stopped to take a drink from her own glass. “Please don’t worry about me, have fun and don’t miss the opportunity with your new…friend.”

You smiled, you loved your friendship with Daisy it really was rare to have someone like her in your life.

“Thanks, D. Anyways, tell me the goss, whats happening?”

————-

About 40 minutes later you sat down for the award show, you were next to Daisy, only two rows away from the front. She was right about seeing faces you recognised from the telly, but you had only been looking for one face in particular. You had seen her just before taking your seats, she had her Spanish friend following her around, that now come to think of it looked more like an assistant. And you would know, it was also your job.

The lights dimmed and a brunette woman came on stage, you assumed she was an athlete from her body alone. The voice over then came into action.

Voice over - Please welcome your host tonight, England’s Lioness, Lucy Bronze.

The whole room clapped and cheered, she must have been someone big, you knew the lionesses were for women’s football, and maybe if you thought hard enough you had seen Lucy Bronze in the news when they won the…..World cup? Or was it Championship? It was something big.

Awards were passed out and speeches were made. They showed clips of women and girls in different sports, and the challenges they faced around the world just to play sport. It made you realise how little you knew about the topic as a whole and women in sports, it actually made you a little embarrassed.

It was near the end of the show, Lucy came back on stage. “This next award is dedicated to one of the biggest names, in not only women’s football but footballs itself. She even rivals myself with her long list of achievements.” The audience laughed at that. “Please can you give a hand to my friend and my capitana, Alexia Putellas.”

You nudged Daisy. “This is your award!” You clapped even louder, she smiled at you, but once again her smile was weird, maybe she was excited? Or nervous? You clapped and watched the screen begin to play, like it did for each winer of the night, showing a short film of their story in their sport. It was actually a lot more interesting than you would have thought.

The short film started with a ball at a pair of legs, the ball was kicked straight into the back of a goal net, then it panned back to the women who kicked it. Your jaw opened comically, you couldn’t believe your eyes.

You felt Daisy laughing quietly next to you, you looked over at her, shock clear on your face. Was this a joke? You had been flirting with one of the greatest women’s football players? And she was flirting with you?

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You whispered harshly.

Daisy laughed even harder, you looked back at the screen, even though you wanted answers, you wanted to watch the movie of the women who had been eye fucking you. And once again you was impressed, the women had done so much in her career.

When the film was over, Lucy walked back to the podium, Daisy’s award now in front of her. Even though she mugged you off and didn’t tell you about Alexia you grabbed her hand and smiled at her, you were so proud of your best friend and her work.

“Ladies and gentlemen. Alexia Putellas.” The audience clapped louder than before. That’s when you saw her, she walked on stage, she hugged Lucy for a few seconds. She picked up her award and smiled.

“Thank you, thank you everyone. This award means a lot to me. It’s not just myself that wins this but all the women in my life that have helped me get to where I am today. So this is for them, thank you for being in my corner and being my cheerleader. Gràcies, thank you.”

You couldn’t stop the stupid smile on your face, did she really just say that? Maybe you were over thinking it, maybe she had already planned to say it and it was just coincidence? Maybe.

The audience clapped and whistled, including yourself. You grabbed Daisy for a hug, her art now belonged to one of the greatest football players in women’s football. Pshh, look at you, already learning a thing or two.

The awards came to an end, you and Daisy made your way to the other room for the after party. It was a bar with a dance floor, but it was dark like a night club, but still had an alogant bar vibe to it. You made your way to a table, as more people started to make their way in.

You sat down, Daisy was standing. “I’ll grab drinks, the usual?”

You smiled up at her. “Please, D.”

She walked over to the bar that was already busy, you looked around the room, trying to not make it too obvious but you were looking for a certain Spaniard. After a few minutes of looking you glanced over your phone, you looked on insta to see if your new friend had an account, your eyes nearly bulged out of your head when you saw she had 3.3 million followers. You really had to get into the world of women’s sport a bit more.

You scrolled looking at her posts, you may have lingered on one or two bikini posts, until someone sat across from you.

“Now, tell me why a pretty girl like you is sitting here all alone and not on the dance floor.” Her Irish accent was clear as day. She had a cheeky face. Like Alexia, her eyes roamed over your body, her eyes were full of mischief. Alexia’s eyes undressed you slowly, but these eyes were fucking you hard from behind, not that you minded.

“I’m waiting for my friend to come back. So no dancing for me.” You smiled. She wasn’t rude or annoying but for some reason you didn’t want Alexia to see you speaking with her. Or maybe you did?

“Oh, she won’t mind if I keep her seat warm for her then.” This girl was very cheeky, you would have loved it any other night, a girl like her would be easily going home with you, but you wasn’t going to full into her charm. She continued.

“I’m guessing you’re not here for the sports, I would definitely remember your face.”

You laughed. “No, not here for the sports, I’m supporting my friend.”

She nodded as she drank her bottle of beer. “Right, gotcha, gotcha.”

“Are you here for the sports?” You asked.

The Irish girl chuckled while she wiped her nose. “I am here for the sport, yeah. I’m a footballer, I play for Arsenal.”

Another football player? Was you their type or something?

“Ohh, sorry. I’m so bad with sports, I don’t have a clue who anyone is.”

She really laughed at that, taking another drink of her beer. “That’s no bother. Are you having a good time? These tings can be awfully boring.”

“I am, it’s not been too bad, meeting new people is always fun.”

She looked at you then, like Alexia she was confident but the mischievousness gave her a cockiness to her, in a sexy way, and if it wasn’t for your new friend you would fall right into her Irish charm, but the Spanish had got a hard hold of your attention.

“Yeah, well I’m having more fun now I’m talking to you.” She smirked at you.

But before you could say anything else a hand landed on your shoulder. You both looked up to see the star of the show.

“Hola, noia bonica. Where are your pom-poms?” She smiled down at you, once again her smile making your insides do somersaults.

You laughed out loud. “Sorry, I must have left them again.” She smiled at the sound of your laugh. She looked over at the Irish girl, who was watching the two of you interact.

“Sorry, I’m not interrupting anything am I? It’s Katie, isn’t it?” The Spaniard smiled down at the girl across from you, you could see the challenge in Alexia’s eyes, waiting for her to say otherwise.

“Yeah, Katie, that’s right. No, you’re grand. Was just getting to know your friend here. She was sat all alone, you don’t want that now, do ya?” She stood up. “But you’re here now. So I’ll let you get back to it.”

“Okay, it was nice to meet you, Katie.” The Spaniard smiled.

“And you Alexia, but it was really nice to meet you.” Katie nodded her head towards you. “Hopefully I can talk to you a little more later.” She smirked at you. “I can’t help it when I see a pretty girl, ya see.” She smirked at Alexia this time, almost like a warning. You felt like you were in the middle of an old western stand off between two cow girls. Was it hot? Fuck yeah! Two gorgeous girls fighting over you, what could be better than that?

You felt the hand on your shoulder tighten slightly. You heard Alexia hum, and smile politely but you could tell from her eyes she wasn’t really smiling. The Irish girl walked away, she winked at you before she disappeared into the crowd. You exhaled the breath you was holding in, looking up at Alexia who also looked a little calmer.

“May I sit?” Alexia motioned to the now vacant chair.

“Please do.”

She sat down, moving the chair a little closer to you.

“I guess congratulations are in order.” You said.

Alexia looked at you, a playful smile crossed her face, her serious demeanour from a few seconds ago completely gone. “Gràcias.”

“I have to say I was a little bit shocked when I saw you pop up on the screen.”

“Ahh yes, did you enjoy it?” She smiled at you almost hopeful.

“Yeah, it was alright.” You looked around pretending to not be fazed. A playful smile on your face.

She laughed, her head tilted back. “You loved it, don’t lie.” She nudged your knee with her own. She continued. “Where is this friend of yours? I’m starting to believe you don’t have any.”

You chuckled. “She’s at the bar, trying to get us a drink, but it’s a bit busy.” You glanced over at the bar.

Alexia looked over and tutted. “Well, if you’d like you and your friend could join me? I have a table, with table service.”

“Well aren’t you generous.” You teased.

“What can I say? I’m a generous girl. I like to give.” She bit her lip at her last words, and my god you nearly melted on the chair.

“Or are you just trying to hide me from a certain Irish girl?” Your smile was playful but also suggestive.

She shock her head, laughing at you. “What? No, I would never! But if it helps to not have all these girls after you, then sí.” She looked at you, almost like she was cautious of what she said.

But she had nothing to worry about, you liked it, you liked the thought of this gorgeous girl not wanting to share you with anyone, and she didn’t even know you.

You leaned in closer to her, you could smell her perfume. “Don’t worry, you have my attention. I’m yours, for now.”

Even in the dark lighting you could see your words had an effect on her, a devilish smirk appeared on her lips. “Mine? I like that.”

Your eyes glistened with mischief, you looked at the blonde’s hazel eyes, she looked like she wanted to take you where you sat.

“I thought you might.” You leaned in closer.

“Merda. You’re naughty. I also like that.” She bit her lip once more, her eyes didn’t move from your lips.

But your bubble was popped again, but this time it was Daisy with your drinks.

“Ahem. Sorry, I don’t mean to interrupt.”

You both pulled away. And Daisy said you were bad with your timing, though you could tell by her face she didn’t mean to.

“Alexia, this is Da-“

“Hola Daisy! This is your friend?” Alexia looked between you.

“Hey Alexia, I’ve been wanting to say hi, but I saw you was busy most of the night.” Daisy handed you your drink.

“No, don’t apologise, I’m sorry I haven’t seen you! You’re the one who made my favourite award!” Alexia stood to hug Daisy. It made sense that they had met each other already, Daisy had told you at the pub that the footballer had requested for her specifically to make her award.

Daisy smiled. “I see you’ve met my plus one. I hope she’s keeping herself out of trouble.”

“Erm, I’m not trouble at all, it’s called being fun.” Your smile was playful.

“Sí, she’s no trouble. She’s been the most entertaining part of the event.”

That made you smile, and even Daisy too.

“I’m glad to hear it.” Your best friend laughed.

“I was just saying you two should come sit at my table, I have table service. I don’t want you to be up and down for drinks.”

“Ahh, how sweet of you. Thank you Ale.” Daisy said.

“It’s no problem, come let’s go. My tables just up here.”

Daisy spotted the table and walked, Alexia put her hand out for you to take. And you did, gladly. Her hands were large and strong. She pulled you up easily, she gestured for you to walk in front of her, and of course you made sure to sway your hips as you walked, clearly it’s what she wanted.

You got to the table, there was a few women already there all in their own conversations, One was Lucy, the presenter from earlier, who was in a deep conversation with another brunette woman, who had beautiful doe like eyes. Alexia introduced you all, she explained, that they were her team mates for Barcelona.

“Hey guys, big fan!” Daisy smiled, you could see even in the dark room her cheeks were slightly red.

But before you could sit down someone was shouting for Daisy. “Daisy! Daisy! I have Claude asking for you!”

Daisy turned around to see one of her work colleagues, panic on her face. “The Claude?”

“Yes! Come on.” Her colleague looked panicked but excited.

Daisy looked over at you, a slight panic of what to do.

“I’m so sorry, I don’t want to leave it’s ju-.”

You put your hand up to stop her. “Don’t even finish that line, go and do what you need to do, Daisy. I’m absolutely fine. Go graft girl.”

Alexia then jumped in. “Don’t worry, I’ll look after her Daisy, I promise.”

Your best friend smiled, and squeezed your hand. “Okay, I might be gone a while, if you decide to leave just text me, and please, please tell me you’re home.” She leaned in closer. “Or someone’s going else’s home.” She winked at you, thinking no one heard but by Alexia’s smile she definitely heard.

She continued. “Ale, thank you again for the invitation. We’ll keep in touch, and please look after this one.”

Alexia put her arm around your waist. “I will, don’t worry.”

Daisy gave you a quick hug. “Thank you for coming tonight, have fun and be safe.” Before you could reply she ran over to her colleague, who looked liked they were about to pass out.

You looked over at Alexia, she was pouring two glasses of champagne. She handed you one, making sure to let her fingers linger. She held up her drink for a toast. “To keeping out of trouble.”

You laughed loudly, you clinked your glass and drank the bubbly drink.

You couldn’t help but notice how fucking hot every one of the teammates were, how had you not got into women’s football before? You may have caught a few eyes raking over you, and Alexia definitely did to, if sitting between you and her team mates was anything to go by.

She leaned in close like she did before. “So, how do I still not know the name of the girl that’s distracted me from work?” She purred.

“Hmm, I think your mind was in other places before asking.” You teased and took a swig of your drink.

“You’re right, how rude of me. Let’s start again. I’m Alexia.” She put her hand out for you to take.

You took her hand and smiled. “Nice to meet you Alexia. My names, Y/N.”

She raised your hand to her lips, she kissed the back of your hand, her eyes locked with yours as she did. Fuck, she was smooth.

She repeated your name softly. “I like that name, I like the way it sounds.”

“I like the way it rolls off your tongue.” You were being bold.

She chuckled. “I can do a lot with my tongue.” But she was bolder.

And yeah, your pussy woke up from that.

You spent the next half an hour in your own bubble once again. You both flirted hard but she also asked what you did for work, she explained some bits of her football career that you had seen on her short film. You noticed though she wanted to talk more about you and your life, you didn’t mind, she probably was bored of having to talk about herself tonight.

Even though you were both close to taking off each other’s clothes, you wanted to know more about the Spaniard. She wasn’t like many girls you spoke to, she was confident, charming and witty, but there was also a sense of vulnerability. Though right now her body language was screaming to have you closer. Those same eyes that was undressing you earlier was full of desire, it was almost like she could see exactly how you looked while she fucked you. And you definitely wanted that to be a reality.

But that dahm bubble was popped again.

Alexia’s assistant had appeared, wincing a smile at you both. “Ale, perdó. Algunes preguntes ràpides per a la premsa anglesa.”

Alexia nodded. “Sorry, I just have to do this, I won’t be too long. You’ll be ok, sí?”

“Yeah, of course. I’ll be okay. You assured her.

She clearly didn’t want to leave you, all of the girls were now on the dance floor, so you’d be alone, clearly not what she wanted.

“Really, go. I’ll stay out of trouble.” You smiled playfully at her.

“Hmm, why do I not believe you.” She chuckled as she slowly walked away.

You watched as she went with her assistant. You went on your phone and sipped on your drink. But just like Alexia had worried you wasn’t alone for long.

“Hola, may I join you?”

You looked up to see another stunning woman, her arms were covered in tattoos, causing your eyes to roam her body. Something she didn’t miss from the smile on her face.

“Oh yeah, sure.”

“Are you here with someone?” She picked up the bottle from the bucket on the table and poured herself a glass, but not without topping up your own glass. You watched as her tattooed fingers wrapped around yours. You had to admit the Spanish girls had such confidence when it came to flirting.

“I’m here with my friend, she’s about but not sure where.” You smiled.

“Ah, just friend? That’s why she doesn’t mind leaving you.”

You were confused. “What do you mean?”

She sat down next to you, right where Alexia sat. “Well, she’s your friend, she doesn’t mind if you talk with others, sí? Because if you were more then my friend, I wouldn’t leave you alone, not with all these girls here.”

“Ohh I see, but what if I have a girlfriend at home?” You challenged playfully.

She drank her drink and shrugged. “She’s at home.” She smiled wickedly at you.

Fuck. These girls were keeping you on your toes.

“My names Mapi.” She put her hand out to shake yours, and as you went to take it a perfect pair of red lips printed on your skin caught yours and Mapi’s eyes.

“Ahh, I’m not the first to talk to you tonight.” She smirked.

You didn’t even realise Alexia had left lipstick on your skin, it sent shivers up your spine, it made you feel like she had already made a statement to mark you as hers.

“I’m Y/N. You’re not the first. ” You smiled.

She continued. “So, your friend. Is she a footballer?” Just like Alexia and Katie, Mapi roamed her eyes up your body, taking in your curves. She smiled as she caught your eyes.

Of course you didn’t mind, if you were going to have anyone look at you in that way you wanted the likes of these girls looking at you. The women’s gaze was the only gaze you wanted. Like Katie, there was no question that you would have had Mapi in your bed tonight. But unfortunately for her you had your eyes set on another Spaniard. Even if she was making it a little difficult for you.

“No, she’s not an athlete, she designed one of the awards.” You took a sip of your drink.

She nodded her head. “Ohh I see, that’s cool.”

“I’m guessing you’re a footballer?” You had a feeling you knew what she was going to say.

She leaned back, displaying a hard six pack, she put her arm over the back of your seat, making her look even more attractive.

“Sí I play for Barcelona. Do you watch football?”

You had to hold back your laugh, of course she played for Barcelona. “I don’t, but I think after tonight I will.”

She laughed, she sat even closer to you, her woody perfume took over your senses. She whispered in your ear. “If you want I can be your first taster.”

Wow, football girls were officially your new type, but before you could respond and politely decline, you heard a voice.

“És clar que hauria de ser tu, Mapi.”

Mapi backed up from you instantly on hearing her captain’s voice. “Què? ella està amb tu?”

Alexia smiled at you. “Sí, però gràcies per fer-li companyia.”

Mapi moved even further from you, putting her her hands up in defence. It might be silly but it was hot to see Alexia once again being jealous over a girl talking to you.

“Ho sento. Ella està calenta. Què puc dir?”

Mapi stood up this time, she drank her drink and looked over at you smirking.

“This is why you shouldn’t be left alone, girls like me come along. Have a good night, noia sexy.”

You chuckled. “It was nice to meet you, Mapi.”

The Spaniard walked closer to Alexia. “Déu meu, tens molta sort. Ella és molt calenta.”

Alexia smiled devilishly at you, her eyes staring straight into yours, it sent a shiver down your spine. It might have been the first time she intimidated you, not that you hated it.

Mapi smiled one last time at you before heading back into the dance floor. Leaving the two of you alone.

Alexia walked over to you, like a lion to its kill. She sat down where Mapi sat. “I leave you for five minutes and you already have another girl on you. You definitely can’t stay out of trouble.” She purred.

“Sorry, it must be a footballer thing.” You teased.

“You’ve had six girls after you, and that’s just from the ones that I know about. Including myself.” She almost sounded annoyed.

“Six?” You questioned.

“Sí, I had three other girls ask about you. But I said you were with me.”

You raised your eyebrows at the blonde, if there was one thing that turned you on about a girl, it was their possessiveness, to a degree of course. But with Alexia it felt like you were in control, she was the one fighting for you and she didn’t even know your last name, you could easily leave tonight without saying another word to her.

Not that you were ever going to do that.

She continued. “Sorry, if it’s too much, you did say you were mine tonight, no?” She smirked at you, she knew you were loving this, she could read you like an open book.

You leaned into her ear, your lips grazed her skin just slightly. “Prove it. Make me yours.”

You almost thought you had said the wrong thing then. Alexia stared at you with a look you couldn’t put your finger on, until she leaned over to your face, her lips inches from yours.

“You might regret that.”

Even the butterflies in your stomach were turned on at this point, this woman was the definition of all your sex dreams. You could feel your body needing her, and she could feel it to.

She continued. “I have a driver outside.”

You didn’t need to hear anything else, you stood up looking at Alexia, she didn’t miss a beat. She grabbed your hand and headed straight to the exit. Within minutes you were in the back of a fancy blacked out Mercedes.

“Can we go to my hotel please.”

“Yes, Ms Putellas.” The driver replied. A blacked out window glided up between you and the driver, giving you and Alexia privacy.

You looked over at the blonde, her hungry eyes were already scanning your body, you had a feeling this girl was going to wreck you. Her eyes caught you own, a devious smile crept on her lips, making your pussy flutter.

“So, you’re all mine?”

“All yours.”

Her lips were on yours in seconds, the kiss was rough and messy, you tried to dominate the kiss but you didn’t try too hard. Not when Alexia was kissing you the way she was, she licked her tongue over your lips, wanting entry and you gave it to her easily.

And wow she could kiss, it might sound silly but her kisses felt different to an English girl, it was like her tongue had more control over its movements. Though, you had heard before that Spanish girls were one of the best for giving head, it was something to do with their tongues, the way they moved it when they spoke. Maybe you’d be able to put it to the test.

You groaned in pleasure as she kissed you deeper, her hands snaked into your hair, pulling you impossibly closer. You pulled back for air, but she only pulled you back again, wanting your mouth on hers. You could tell she was as desperate for you as you was her, she let out a small moan as you pressed your tongue into her mouth.

Her red lipstick had all but disappeared by the time you got to her hotel.

You hadn’t realised how nice of a hotel it was when you entered. Her room was over looking the Thames and most of London’s skyline, making the room glow from the city’s lights.

You walked towards the window looking over the city, it was always one of your favourite views at night. Other than a naked woman in your bed.

That’s when you felt the Spaniard move your hair gently to one side, her hot lips pressed against the back of your neck. She hummed into you, making your skin cover in goosebumps. She smiled into the kiss, she obviously felt what she was doing to you. You whimpered as she kept her mouth working on you, her hands gripping your waist.

You were on cloud nine, Alexia’s mouth and body pressed up against you like this made the city lights look blurry. She moved your body around to face her, she leaned closer into you, her hazel eyes roamed your face, landing on your lips. Even in the dark her eyes glowed like gold, her eyes reminded you of a cat hunting at night. The atmosphere changed from fast and quick to soft and sensual.

“Can I get you anything? A drink? Tea?” She smiled.

“No thanks, just want you.”

She hummed. “What do you want from me?”

“To fuck me. Do what you want with me.”

“Merda.” She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. She must have liked what you said as you were suddenly being picked up like a rag doll, like you was nothing. Your legs wrapped around her waist as she walked you to the bedroom. Your back hit the wooden door as you entered her room, she was on your neck with her sweet mouth, kissing you, her hips pressing you hard against the door.

“What can’t I do?” She whispered.

“I’ll tell you if it’s too much.” You rasped

“Any safe words?” She kissed your lips.

“Red, yellow and green?”

“Sí.” She husked.

“Same for you?”

“Sí, the same for me.”

You were thrown on the bed, your back hitting the mattress, once again you couldn’t believe the strength of the girl in front of you. She climbed on top of you, her lips attacking your neck, she had already worked out it was your sweet spot, making you moan as her lips sucked and licked on your skin. She was definitely making a mark, and normally you wouldn’t have it, you wouldn’t walk around with a love bite on show, but with Alexia you wanted it. You wanted to look in the mirror and remember it was her that gave it to you. That claimed you.

Her hand stroked up your thigh, pushing the slit of your dress up, inching higher to where you needed her. You were wet, you could feel your thong becoming drenched, you could feel your skin sticking to the thin fabric. Her hips pushed into you, she was clearly finding her self composure hard to control. Her fingers traced over your sensitive skin, between your thighs, teasing you, maybe even teasing herself.

“Please.” You whispered.

“Please what?” She smiled as she kissed down your chest.

“Please, I need you.”

“Hmm, you need me?” She purred.

“Yes.” Your voice was desperate.

“How much?” She started to move your straps of your dress down your shoulders, revealing your black laced bra.

“Since I saw you.” Your voice almost broken as she attached her lips to the top of your breast.

“Hmm, that’s a long time. You must be desperate?”

“I a- am. Fuck!” Your voice strained as she attached her mouth to your perked nipple. You didn’t even notice she had opened your bra, she had taken advantage of the front clasp. Thank god for front clasps.

Her mouth was perfect, she sucked and bit on your nipple, making you groan, your hand tangled in her blonde hair. She bit at your flesh, then sucked again to soothe the pleasurable pain. The noise you let out was loud, she smiled up at you, clearly enjoying her view.

“You’re loud. I like that.”

You couldn’t form words, you groaned and tugged gently at her hair as she moved to your other nipple. One of her hands were still in between yours thighs, slowly tracing her fingers up and down your sensitive skin. She was driving you mad, and she knew it. Her hips relentlessly pushed into your core, making you moan again and again.

“Please, Alexia.” You felt like you could have cried, you were that desperate. Your pussy was aching, needing something. Needing her.

You felt her chuckle into your skin, her fingers finally, but just barely touched the fabric over your pussy.

“Merda, estàs molt mullat.” She rasped.

You didn’t have a clue what she was saying but fuck, did it make you wet. She could be calling you every name under the sun and you didn’t care. As long as she was saying it.

“Is this all for me?” She began to sit up.

“Yes.” You nodded your head, you couldn’t help but wonder how desperate you must have looked. “All for you.”

“You really are trouble, aren’t you?”

“Only if you want me to be.” God this girl was making you a mess, you was putty in her hand and she hadn’t even touched you.

She watched you as she started to remove her jacket, her smile never leaving her face. You sat up at the end of the bed, you helped pull the arms down, and you were right, she was completely naked underneath. All night she had been walking around with nothing on, she clearly had a lot of trust in the jacket.

Her full breast was now on show, you let out an appreciative sigh. She was fucking gorgeous. You kissed her tight stomach, you watched as her muscles flexed from your mouth. Her hands stroked into your hair, sending a shiver down your spine. You kissed and licked at her beautiful olive skin, kissing up to the line of where her trousers sat. You looked up at her, bitting your lip asking for permission.

She nodded, watching you like a hawk. You popped open the button and slowly pulled her zip down, revealing more skin, and the start of her red laced thongs. Before you could pull her trousers down she cupped your chin, making you face her. She gently ran her thumb over your bottom lip.

“You’re so beautiful. So many girls wanted you tonight, so many eyes were on you. But you chose to be with me. I am very lucky.”

You felt yourself blush, one minute she had you begging to be fucked, now she had you going red and shy.

“You had eyes on you too, I saw the way people looked at you.”

She smiled then, but it wasn’t her normal smile you had seen all night, it almost looked a little sad. But you didn’t have time to question it, she shuffled out of her trousers letting them hit the floor. She stood you up, pulling your dress over your head, you were both now only in your underwear.

You moved your mouth to her breast, and sucked on her sensitive nipple. You heard her suck in a breath, her hands going straight to your hair. You gave her breast the attention that they deserved, sucking, biting and kissing on the blushed coloured flesh. She groaned softly, her eyes were closed enjoying the sensation of your mouth. You let go of the flesh with a loud popping sound. Letting your lips rub against her.

She opened her eyes, the golden hazel colour you had seen earlier had now nearly disappeared. She pushed you on the bed once more. Your thongs were being pulled down your thighs, you both saw the wetness attached to the fabric, the smile on her face turned devilish.

“You’re mine, sí?”

“Yes. All yours.”

She climbed on top of you, peppering kisses down your body, it felt like she kissed every possible bit of flesh on your body. Then she was in between your legs. Her teeth sunk into your thighs, making you whimper. She soothed the red mark with her tongue, kissing and licking.

Then finally, her tongue licked through your very wet folds. You wasn’t sure who groaned louder. Her tongue licked through you again, and again and again, until she was in a rhythm. What you heard about Spanish girls was right, it was a whole different sensation. She dipped her tongue into your cunt, making you groan, your hands grabbed her head, pushing her deeper as she fucked you with her tongue.

“Alexiaaa! Fuck!”

She glided her tongue up to your clit, wrapping her full lips around your bundle of nerves. And fuck, you were already close. But who could blame you? She’d worked your body up to the point of tears. She sucked and licked at your sensitive flesh, your hands were still in her hair, moving her how you wanted her. Not that you needed to do much, she knew what she was doing, her mouth was perfect. Your eyes closed as you started feeling your orgasm approaching, your stomach tightening, feeling the warmth glide over your body.

“I’m close, please don’t stop.”

But she did. She moved her mouth away from you, you could see your juices all over her chin and lips, she looked breathtaking.

“Nooo! I was so cl-.”

Then you felt her fingers at your entrance. She thrusted two fingers into you, cutting off your words. You let out a deep throaty moan, as her thick fingers began to thrust into you.

“Not until I say you can.”

Fuck, she really was the girl of your dreams.

You nodded, wanting to be good for her. You couldn’t help but find it a little worrying at how easy it was for Alexia to see right though you. How easy she could get you begging, denying your orgasm, leaving marks all over your body and you had only met her a couple of hours ago. And you thought you were in control?

“Bona noia.” She whispered.

She began to thrust deeper, her fingers pushing against your soft flesh, pushing your body to control what it desperately needed. You couldn’t stop the moans slipping out of your mouth, her fingers were talented, just like her mouth. You watched her strong arm flex at her movements.

“You will take my dick. Sí?”

She had a strap? This girl was made in heaven.

“Yes, yes.” You cried.

“Good. You want to come like this?”

“Your mouth and fingers. Please!.” You begged.

She chuckled deeply. She leaned back down and attached her lips to your clit again, making you scream. She hummed against your core, your hand tangled in her hair as you felt your climax approaching. You looked down to see those golden hazel eyes staring at you. You pushed your hips into her mouth, grinding her tongue on your swollen clit. Her fingers were relentless, your thighs started to shake, your fingers pulled at her hair, pushing her closer to your sex. You came hard, Alexia’s name rolling off your tongue as your body shuddered.

She stayed there, well she had to, you didn’t let her go. You thrusted your hips, taking every bit of her tongue. She lapped up your ever flowing juices, slurping and swallowing, making you gasp and whimper. You finally let go of her hair, but she didn’t move, she traced her tongue all over your pussy, kissing and sucking. Her strong hands kept your hips down, not able to move.

“Ale… fuck. Alexia, baby, please.” You gently gasped.

She didn’t move, she was in her own world, tasting you, eating your cunt like it was her last meal. You groaned gently, letting her take what she wanted from you. You could feel another orgasm already building back up. She finally stopped, she must have felt your body tensing, she wasn’t going to let you come again that quickly.

“You taste so good baby.”

She kissed your thighs as she climbed up to your face, kissing you gently. You groaned at tasting yourself on her tongue, her smile once again making your stomach flutter.

Alexia jumped off the bed, you tried to catch your breath as you watched her rummage around in her suitcase. You pushed yourself on your elbows, watching the Spaniard attaching her harness, a 7 inch dildo sat between her strong thighs.

“So, do you always carry your harness around?” You teased.

She chuckled. “Sí, it’s my travel harness.”

You laughed loud, this girl was ridiculous.

She continued. “Are you complaining? I can take this off?”

You shock your head, eyes wide. “No. Sorry.”

She smirked, she turned back around in her suit case and pulled out a black tie.

“I think I might have to tie you up, you’ve been trouble all night.”

You nodded, you put your hands in front of you for her to tie. You could feel your pussy throbbing again. She stepped in front of you, her dick inches from your body.

“Uh-ah, hands behind your back baby.” Her tone was soft.

You stood up, turning around to allow her to tie your wrist. She ever so gently bounded your hands together, it was tight, you couldn’t get I out of it if even if you tried. Your breathing picked up, you could feel your legs shaken in anticipation.

She moved your hair to the side like she did before, her lips gently kissed up your neck, her mouth was close to your ear.

“If it’s too much, tell me baby. I’ll stop straight away. Okay?”

You nodded. “Okay, thank you. I’m green.”

She continued to kiss your neck, her hands snaked up to your breast squeezing gently. You groaned from her touch, as her large hands roamed your breast.

“M'encanten els sorolls que fas.” She whispered.

“Fuck, Ale.”

“Yes, baby?” Her lips were hot on your skin driving you mad.

“I love it when you speak to me like that.”

“In Catalan? You like it?” She purred.

“Yes.” Your hips moved backwards.

She chuckled at your lack of patience. “Ets la meva bona noia.”

You groaned again, your hips pushed back, hitting her dick on your arse.

“Get on your knees and show me what your pretty mouth can do.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. You turned around to stand in front of her and dropped to your knees, you took the tip of her dick in your mouth and sucked.

Her hands were in your hair instantly. You pushed your mouth further on the length of her dick, swallowing her inch by inch. You pulled back to catch your breath, you could feel yourself becoming wet all over again. You looked up at the Spaniard, she looked as wrecked as you felt, you could see was clenching her jaw, her eyes were full of lust.

“You look so good.” She whispered.

You took a deep breath as you took her back into your mouth. She groaned looking down at you, she watched your mouth take her more than half way. She gently pushed your head to take more of her, but you began to choke. You pulled back again, tears began to prick at your face.

“Take a deep breath baby, relax your throat.” She stroked your cheek, she looked deep in your eyes, almost lovingly. You would have laughed if her dick wasn’t shoved in your mouth, the girl could switch up her tone so easily.

You nodded, you took another deep breath and slowly took her in again, you felt her hand at the back of your head, guiding you further down her dick. You got past the halfway point, you could feel the tip of her dick touching the back of your tongue. A single tear fell from your eye as you pushed yourself. Her hand was still on your head, she pushed her dick slowly but firmly into the back of your throat, your nose just touching her stomach.

“That’s it baby, just like that. You’re doing so good.” She rasped.

You pulled back slightly, then slowly took her back in your throat, her hands tightening in your hair. Spit started to drip from your mouth, as you kept sucking on her dick. She started to gently move her hips in time with your movements, pushing herself further down your throat. It made you gag, but she kept her hand on your head.

“Breathe, baby. Breathe. You’re doing so good.”

And you did, you calmed your breathing and pushed on her dick. A few more tears trickled down your cheeks. She thrusted her hips again, slowly and gently, never taking her eyes off of you.

“You look so beautiful on your knees for me. If only all those girls could see you now, taking me like this.” She groaned.

You moaned at her words, you loved a girl that spoke to you during sex, it turned you on to no end. And her accent only made it that much hotter. Your pussy was throbbing, aching to be touched again, but you wanted so badly to please Alexia.

Her hips started to pick up pace, her thick dick sliding in and out of your throat. You could hear her breathing becoming shallow. She easily took control over your movements, not that you had any real choice, your hands tied behind your back put you under her complete control. And you loved it.

“Tal qual, Tal qual. Sí.” She groaned. “So good.”

Your wet slurping noise filled the room, spit dribbled down your mouth and on to the floor. The strap was hitting Alexia perfectly on her clit, she had been turned on as much as you so she wasn’t far from her own orgasm.

“Merdaa. Your mouth is perfect. Just take a little more baby.”

And you did, Alexia fucked your throat until her legs started to tremble. Her moaning got louder, you could tell she found that sweet spot as her hips thrusted faster, You pushed yourself as hard as you could, as she used your mouth to reach her own orgasm. She was mumbling a mixture of Catalan and English as she was tipping over the edge.

“Estic venint! I’m coming!” She pushed your head down the whole length of her dick as she came. Your nose was pressed against her hard stomach as she rutted against the base of her strap.

“Merda, merda.” She whispered, she pulled your head back gently, just as you began to choke.

“Oh Déu meu, I can’t feel my legs, you were so good baby. Are you okay?” She rasped, her hands stroked your face so gently. You breathed hard, trying to catch your breath, tears streaming down your face as you coughed.

“Y-yeah. I’m good.” You panted. Smiling up at the blonde.

“You were so good for me. Come.” She picked you up to your feet easily. She kissed your swollen lips gently. “Colour?”

“Green.” You husked.

“Okay, are your arms okay?” She wiped away your tears, smiling at you.

You nodded. “Yeah.” You felt your stomach flutter.

“Good, I want to fuck you from behind, like this. Is that oka-“

“Yes, yes. It’s okay. Please. Do it, please.” Fuck, she had officially wrecked you.

Alexia’s eyebrows raised in shock, she started to smirk. “She’s still desperate, that’s okay. I’ll fix that.”

She turned you around facing the bed, you felt her hand gently push your body down to lay. Your arms were still tied behind your back, once again you were under Alexia’s control. You couldn’t believe tonight had turned into this, you had only gone to out support your best friend and now was about to be railed by the girl of your dreams. Best. Night. Ever.

She moved your body to how she wanted you. The side of your face was pressed into the mattress, and your arse was in the air, you were lined up perfectly to her dick. She stroked her hand down your back, looking at the beautiful site in front of her. She could see you was dripping. Your thighs were wet.

“You are perfect.” She stroked her fingers through your folds, making you whimper.

She didn’t want to wait around anymore, she’d pictured you in many different ways tonight, and finally she was living her dreams.

She pushed the head of her dick slowly into you, and it was thick. Her hands grabbed hold of your waist, you both gasped as she pushed the rest of herself inside, making you stretch. She began to roll her hips, already loving the small noises you were making for her. In this position she had full control over you. And like the submissive little bitch that you were, you loved it.

“Fuck, you take me so well. Look at you. You’re mine, Sí?”

“Yes!” You cried.

Her hips began to thrust at a hard pace, making you cry out. Her hips were strong, the noises of her skin slapping your skin was erotic. The room was drowning in your whimpers and moans as the Spaniard fucked you like she owned you. And that’s exactly what she was doing, you’d told her you was hers tonight, she was fucking you like you was hers.

“You’re mine? Tell me.” She demanded.

“Y-yes. I’m y-yours. Yours.” You struggled to speak.

Your mumbles were incoherent, you were seeing stars as her hips kept up a relentless pace. You wasn’t going to come like this, you could feel your orgasm teetering but you needed your clit to be touched.

“Alexia, please. Touch me.”

“Not yet baby, we come together.” She panted out.

You wanted to argue but you were scared she would deny your orgasm completely. So you kept quite and took what she gave you, it wasn’t like you wasn’t loving her fucking you like this. However, you didn’t take in to consideration the stamina this girl possessed. You had been with many different types of girls, but never a footballer, not a professional athlete. And my god she made your body work. She had you going like this for another 20 minutes.

And those 20 minutes were heaven and hell. Your body was going limp, sweat ran down your back as she thrusted into you. You felt her strong hand squeezeyour arse cheeks, guiding you up and down on her dick, moving you around like her own personal sex toy. Your clit was crying out to be touched. But, finally, by the sounds of her breathing and moaning she sounded close herself. Her nails dug into your skin as she pushed herself against the strap, the pressure was just right as she rubbed her clit against the base, causing her to go deeper inside your core.

“Take it baby, take it.” She groaned.

Your eyes rolled at the back of your head. She moved her fingers on to your clit, she hardly needed to touch you before your body started to jerk. Her fingers rubbed beautifully at your bundle of nerves, making you plead for her to not stop.

“I love the way you beg. It drives me crazy. Come for me, you’ve been so good.” Alexia panted.

An animalistic cry escaped your mouth as your orgasm hit you. Your pussy pulsated hard around her dick, and Alexia didn’t stop, she thrusted her hips deep, pulling your tight walls, making you almost pass out. And she was right behind you, her orgasm took over her body, she leaned forward, grabbing the back of your neck, pushing your face into the mattress. Her hips roughly doubled down her pace. The air in your lungs was being forced out from her sheer strength.

A deep, rumble like moan escaped her lips, as she came. Her hips slowed down to a stop. She gently pulled out of you, you cried out as you felt the warmth of her body leaving you.

“You’re so perfect. Merda.”

You felt her untie your hands, she helped you guide them forward, knowing they would be a little stiff now. You moaned from the ache in your muscles, you could just about move your arms. Your wrists were red, that was definitely going to leave a mark for a while. Another mark to remember her by. You felt her guide you on your back, it nearly took your breath away how fucking good she looked, her face was flushed, her hair a little bit of a mess and her smile was dopey.

“You okay? What’s your colour?”

“I’m green, green everywhere.” You laughed quietly. “Your colour?” Even though she was mostly the one in control you still wanted to make sure she was okay.

She smiled, she looked surprised to be asked. “I’m green, thank you, cariño. I’m going to run a bath.” She was gone all of a sudden. It made you suddenly realise you were in Alexia’s room, in her space, in her way. You felt a little dazed, you stood up on shaky legs, you were looking around for your clothes, trying to get out of the girls way.

Alexia came back into the room, she watched you a little confused. “What are you doing?”

You jumped, suddenly feeling a lot more shy. “Oh sorry, I don’t want to be in your way.”

She stepped closed to you. A serious expression on her face. “I don’t want you to leave. You can if you want to. But I want you to stay, relax your body in the bath, you will be sore.” She smirked.

You felt a little calmer, her eyes were watching you for any indication of what you were thinking. She must have realised you were overthinking it all. She continued. “Please, I don’t fuck girls and kick them out. Let me look after you.” She kissed the back of your hands, never taking her eyes off of you.

You nodded, your hands crept up her neck, pulling her closer towards you. She closed the gap with her lips attached to your own. It was slow and sensual, it was what you needed after the sex you just had. She picked you up, again the strength of this girl was unbelievable. She walked you to the bathroom, putting you on the cabinet side, you squealed from the cold service on your cheeks.

“Sorry baby.” She genuinely looked sorry.

“No it’s okay. I can take it.”

That made her smile. “Hmm, I saw from tonight that you can take a lot.” She purred in your ear.

She had made you a bubble bath, you felt almost a little embarrassed at how you felt earlier, trying to rush out. Though sometimes being fucked from an inch of your life could bring up emotions like that, that’s clearly why she was doing this for you. She understood.

She helped you get in, it was perfect. You laid back and relaxed, allowing the hot water to relax your muscles. She left you to be alone for about 10 minutes, until you needed her again. It scared you, you were feeling a little too attached to a girl you hadn’t even known a day.

“Ale.”

She came in, a beautiful smile on her face, she looked a little tired. It made you think about her leaving for tomorrow. Would you ever see her again? She stroked your hair back behind your ear. Kissing your forehead. She helped you out of the bath, and into the room, she helped you to dry your body, her lips kissing your back. Making you gasp. She laid you on the bed, sleep was taking over your body, you then heard what sounded like a shower and then sleep took you for the night.

——————

You woke the next morning to a hot kisses on your back, you almost forgot where you were until you could hear Alexia hum against your skin. Her lips were all over your back, making you moan, it was the best kind of way to wake up, well, that was until she guided you on your back.

“Good morning. I hope you don’t mind but, I really want to taste you.”

She stared up at you as she kissed your stomach. Your sleepy daze hadn’t left you yet, your arms ached from last night. But my god there was no way you’d say no to this.

You nodded your head. “Please.” Your morning voice was rougher then normal, you was desperate for this women all over again.

She was between your legs in seconds, she was just as desperate as you, she sucked and licked on your clit until you came twice for her. Your tired hips gently fucked her face, your hands twisted in her hair, pushing her head against you as you came on her tongue. You felt her moan, as she swallowed your juices. Now that was a way to wake up.

You looked down at her beautiful morning face, her eyes were still sleepy, her smile was a little dazed. God this girl was beautiful.

“Let me please.” You whispered. You hadn’t got to taste the gorgeous woman in front of you yet, it felt criminal that you hadn’t had your mouth on her.

You could see even in her sleepy haze that she wanted it too but that vulnerable side you saw last night had creeped back up. She climbed up your body and laid next to you, for the first time she looked nervous, you wanted to make sure she knew she was wanted.

“You look so beautiful, Ale.” You kissed her lips gently.

You kissed her neck, sucking on parts of her skin that made her squirm. The roles seemed to have reversed this morning, she was the one submitting to you, her whimpers and moans made your head spin. You lowered yourself between her legs, she was dripping.

“Fuck, you’re so wet, Ale. All for me?” She nodded, her lips between her teeth. “Sí.”

You didn’t wait around, you dipped your tongue through her velvety folds, her juices covered your tongue as you finally got to taste her. You had wondered what she tasted like the majority of the night, wondered what she would sound like while you sucked on her clit. And it was better than anything you could have imagined. She was perfect, she was your new favourite flavour.

You lapped up at her wet cunt, stroking and gliding your tongue through her sensitive flesh. Making sure to miss her clit, you just wanted to stay there all day, listen to her make those sweet noises. It was the first time you were really getting to hear her, she’d only grunted and moaned last night, but now you got to really hear her. You were shocked at how delicate she sounded, how desperate she was, the sounds you were dragging out of her made your head spin. It was a complete 360 from her confident, dominant self. Maybe that’s why she looked so nervous.

You felt her fingers glide into your hair, pulling at your scalp.

“Please stop teasing. Please.”

You stopped your movements. “What was that baby?”

She whined. “Please, I need you.”

“You need me?” You quickly licked her clit. Her body jolted, her body was more wound up than you thought.

“Sí. I need you.”

Another lick. She gasped.

“Hmm, are you mine?”

“Sí. I’m yours. Please.”

Well, that was easier than you would have liked. So you kissed her clit, wanting to tease her. She cried out, she pulled your hair to try and get you where she needed you, and you didn’t want to tease her no more, not when she looked close to tears.

You wrapped your lips around her bundle of nerves and sucked. Her back arched of the mattress as she fucked your face, her hands pulled your closer to her sex. Once again you were under her control, but you really didn’t mind, as long as she came in your mouth that’s all you cared about.

“Don’t stop, don’t stop.” Her legs were shaken, her high pitched whines became loud, you was certain the people either side of you could hear her.

“Merda!” She pushed your head down, keeping you where she needed you as she came in your mouth. Her juices gushed in your mouth, her hands in your hair didn’t allow you to move. You swallowed every drop as she snaked her hips slowly, feeling your skilful tongue. She breathed hard as she let go, you looked up to see her chest rising and falling. She felt like she had been to heaven and back.

“Wow, I don’t know if I known English anymore.” She chuckled, her hand over her face. You could see her cheeks were flushed.

You crawled up to her face, kissing her deeply, she moaned as both your flavours blended in your tongues. You spent another half an hour cuddled up in her sheets, you traced your fingers on her tattoos, you wondered what they stood for. Your bubble of bliss was interrupted when her phone alarm went off.

She groaned, turning off the noise. You suddenly felt dread, you knew what that meant. You had to leave, and get on with your life and she went back to Barcelona. You felt like you were loosing something you never even had. Someone you met less then 24 hours ago who suddenly felt like someone whose side you never wanted to leave.

“I have to get ready for my flight.” She sounded sad, maybe even angry. She turned around and kissed your cheek. You both got ready to leave. It was quiet between you, the atmosphere had changed from fast and hungry to, silent and sad.

Suddenly she was behind you, her warm body pressed against your back. She whispered in your ear. “Would you visit?”

“In Barcelona? Yes.” You whispered back.

She pulled you closer, her lips back on your neck.

“You promise?”

“Yes.”

“You’re mine?”

“Fuck, yes.”

She had you pressed up against the wall, her fingers pressed against your clit, as she gave you your third orgasm of the morning. You told her you was hers throughout.

She arranged for a taxi to pick you up. You were in your dress from the night before, you clearly looked like were doing the walk of shame. She pulled out a thick cream Nike jumper from her suitcase and started to pull it over your head. Your senses were surrounded by her smell. It made you feel warm and soft inside. Fuck.

She walked down with you to the taxi, you felt a mix of emotions, you wanted nothing more than to stay with this girl, but you were from two different worlds. You didn’t regret last night but the feelings that had come with it were maddening, you’d been with girls like this before, but there was something different about Alexia. And she felt it to.

She pulled you in for hug, she kissed your lips with so much passion, you could feel the emotion behind it. She pulled back, holding your face in her large hands. She looked you in your eyes, her hazel orbs searched your face.

“My cheerleader.” She chuckled.

You laughed out loud, making the Spaniard smile. Fuck this was hard. She pulled the hoody over your head and pressed another kiss to your mouth.

“Goodbye, cariño.”

“Bye, Alexia.”

She watched you get in the back of the cab, and closed the door behind you. The car started to pull away, you watched as she stood there, watching you drive away. She stayed until you turned the corner.

And she was gone.

I hope you liked it, I very much enjoyed writing it. I’ve used Google for the translation, so apologies for anything being wrong! This a one shot for now, but will add to it later.

[lovelyjj]

congratulations honey!!! you so so so deserve it<3<3<3

sooo I'm in a dilema it's either pillow fight "Shh... just a little bit more." maybe it could be the second or third time they sleep together? or painting nails with never be by 5sos i think is so jj x pogue!reader coded whatever you like more<3

Thank you so much! How about both😏

also how’d you know i am a 5sos girlie for life🤞🏻

here is the link for the other story

Never Be

jj maybank x reader

lyrics are in bold

I need your love to light up this house

I wanna know what you're all about

I wanna feel you feel you tonight

I wanna tell you that it's alright

Being friends with Kiara was fun. She was pretty much your only friend. You were really quite shy. So when Kiara mentioned this party she wanted you to go to you were hesitant. But of course Kiara found a way to drag you to it. The party was at the boneyard.

Being the shy girl that you were you stayed close to Kiara's side. "Come here Y/N, I want to introduce you to some people," Kiara told you. "Okay," you responded. Kiara led you through the sea of people and to a nearby branch. At the tree log there was John B who you knew. There was a few other people that you didn't know but you had a feeling you were going to find out.

"Y/N, this is Pope," Kiara introduced you to a curly haired boy who stuck out his hand for you to shake.

"Hi nice to meet you," you said.

"Hi I've herd a lot about you it's nice to finally meet you," Pope replied.

"And this is JJ," Kiara pointed to a blonde haired boy in a muscle tee.

"Hey I'm JJ," JJ reached his hand out and turned to look at you. When JJ saw you for the first time it was like the whole world stopped spinning. You looked like an angel. JJ had to blink himself back to reality.

You shook his hand. "I'm Y/N, how are you?"

"Uh Im doing good i think yeah i'm good how are you," JJ stuttered.

When you saw JJ you were immediately greeted with a funny feeling in your stomach. He was beautiful. He looked so hot it was almost too much for you. Then you got sad because you assumed he had a girlfriend.

"I'm good thanks," you replied.

"Why don't I get you a drink?" JJ asked.

"Okay," you smiled.

JJ led you to the keg and poured you a drink. "Here this should take the edge off," JJ handed you the beer. You took a sip letting the liquid slide down your throat, easing your nerves.

"So how come I haven't seen you around here," JJ asked.

"Oh I don't know I'm mostly hanging out with Kiara and I'm pretty shy," you don't know why you were opening up to him but the conversation felt easy.

"Iv been friends with Kiara for a while," JJ responded.

"Yeah she told me about you."

"Oh really what did she say?" JJ asked.

"That your a crazy and impulsive surfer guy," you giggled.

"Sounds about right," JJ winked at you.

You weren't gonna deny that JJ was attractive. He was the most attractive and beautiful man you've ever seen. He made you feel all tingly or maybe that was the alcohol.

"So what's your story?" JJ asked.

"My story?"

"Yeah like how'd you get here and who are you really?"

"Oh well I've lived here since I was 5. My parents and I live near the cut. I have a job at the country club as a waitress. I love the beach a little too much. Im a good friend and listener but sometimes Im a little shy and i'm a light weight," you explained.

"You sound wonderful. I think we're gonna get along just fine," JJ smiled.

"Okay," you laughed.

You and JJ fell into comfortable conversation, chatting about anything and everything. The two of you talked til it became sunset. You watched as the sky turned into beautiful pink and orange colors. JJ was glad he met you because he liked you and your personality. He learned quite a bit about you.

I need your love to guide me back home

When I'm with you I'm never alone

I need to feel you feel you tonight

I need to tell you that it's alright

JJ never really had a home. With his father being an abusive drunk his house was not a good home. His place of residence or his actual home was the château. John B was happy to have JJ stay with him. They were best friends.

JJ considered you a friend. After the boneyard party the two of you hung out a lot, with and without Kiara. JJ took a liking to you. The two of you we're becoming fast friends. You liked JJ a lot. He was exciting and confident. He challenged you.

It was a rare occasion when JJ went to his house. This time he needed a few things from his room. Some clothes, some toiletries and some necessities. He thought his dad was out of the house but boy was he wrong. His dad was home and drunk and angry.

Luke took his anger out on JJ, like he always did. JJ got beat up pretty bad but he managed to get away. JJ didn't know what to do next. He got on his bike and made his way towards your house aching in pain. JJ hasn't opened up to you about his dad yet. But he needed to see you. He had to.

You were on your bed listening to music. It was a quiet evening. Then all of a sudden you herd a tapping at your window. You turned your music off and rushed to your window to see a bruised and broken JJ. You opened the window and helped him inside as he winced.

"JJ what the hell happened?"

"Look I know you're probably really worried but it's okay i'm a tough guy. I just wanted to see you," JJ explained.

"JJ, if your not gonna tell me what happened at least let me help," you countered. JJ nodded. You took him to your bathroom and got out the first aid kit. You also got some rubbing alcohol from the medicine cabinet.

"Wait here I'll be right back," you spoke.

You went downstairs to the kitchen to get some pain killers and some water. Then you came back up and into your bathroom where JJ was waiting. "Here take this, it will help with the pain," you gave him an Advil and the water to wash it down with.

"Thank you," JJ smiled softly. It was hard to be unhappy when he was around you. You made him feel better just by being there.

You wiped his cuts with alcohol and put a bandage on them. "I need you to lift up your shirt. I need to see if there's more."

"Y/N."

"JJ please," you begged.

Hesitantly JJ lifted up his shirt and what you saw broke your heart in half. Deep purple and blue bruises littered his stomach and sides. You took a deep breath and tried not to cry. You swallowed and then said, "Are you gonna tell me who did this?"

"It's alright, I'm alright," JJ responded.

You did your best to clean JJ up. You continued without a word. Silently you got up and put the kit away. "Can I- can I stay here tonight?" JJ asked.

"Yeah of course."

"I could sleep on the floor," JJ suggested.

"Don't be silly. I'll get the air mattress from the hall closet," you replied.

After blowing up the air mattress you got a bunch of blankets. You placed the mattress on the floor right next to your bed. "You can have my bed, I can sleep on the air mattress," you offered. "No no you take your bed i'll be fine." JJ seemed comfortable.

The next morning the two of you ate breakfast together. JJ didn't want to go home. He also realized he was falling in love with you. He didn't know what to do. What if you didn't feel the same way. What would he do?

"Do you have a safe place to stay?" You asked JJ.

"Yeah I'll be okay, thanks for being there for me I appreciate everything you've done," JJ told you.

Your love and kindness guided him back to the château. JJ walked in with a lovesick smile on his face. "What's with you?" John B questioned.

"Oh nothing," JJ continued to smile.

"Well you must of gotten laid or something," John B snickered.

"Nope nothing like that," JJ responded.

John B rolled his eyes. JJ went to his room to go plot some ways he could steal your heart.

We'll never be as young as we are now

It's time to leave this old black and white town

Let's seize the day, let's run away

Don't let the colors fade to gray

We'll never be as young as we are now

As young as we are now

I've seen myself here in your eyes

I stay awake 'til the sunrise

I wanna hold you hold you all night

I wanna tell you that you're all mine

You and JJ have been texting for weeks. You also spent a lot of time together alone. JJ was trying to get the courage to ask you out on a date. He figured since you were hanging so much you might say yes. He hoped and prayed.

You and Kiara were at the château hanging out. JJ made an appearance and asked if you could talk with him. Kiara raised her eyebrows at you but you waved her off.

You entered JJ's room and JJ motioned for you to sit on his bed. "Okay I just wanted to ask you something," JJ started.

"Of course, you can ask me anything," you responded.

"I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me?" JJ nervously bit his lip.

"Oh I mean I would love to."

"Wait really?"

"Yes really."

JJ tackled you in a big hug. You fell back on the bed and JJ hugged your middle while he was practically on top of you. You laughed.

"How about tomorrow?" JJ asked.

"Tomorrow is great," you replied.

——

The next day came fast. JJ had it all planned out. He was gonna take you to dinner and then you were gonna watch the sunset on the beach. He showed up to your house with a bouquet of roses and knock on the front door. You opened the door with a big smile. JJ almost died. His heart stopped. You looked gorgeous.

You were wearing a pretty blue and white sundress and you were wearing minimal makeup. You still looked like the most beautiful girl in the world, according to JJ. JJ handed you the roses as he greeted you.

"JJ these are beautiful thank you!"

"You're welcome," he smiled.

You put the flowers in a vase full of water and then put them on the kitchen counter. "Ready to go?" JJ asked. "Yes."

JJ drove you to the dinner place. It was nice, really nice. "You look beautiful," JJ complimented. JJ couldn't believe he was on a date with you. He admired you so much and deeply.

"Thank you," you blushed.

"So tell me do you have a bucket list?" JJ asked.

"Yeah I do actually. One of the main things on there is to travel the world. Another thing is to go bungee jumping. Maybe go on a road trip. Ya know the usual. What's on yours?"

"I want to take a surf trip to Yucatán," JJ smiled.

"Sounds like a dream," you sighed.

"I truly hope all your dreams and wishes come true," JJ spoke softly.

"Thank you, I hope yours do too!"

Eventually your food came and you enjoyed your wine and dinner talking to each other. JJ saved up enough money where he could pay for the both of you, so he did. Then the two of you walked hand in hand to the beach.

Once you got to the beach JJ grabbed some blankets from the car and spread them out over the sand. You sat down on the blanket and rested your head on JJ's shoulder. The sun was starting to set.

The sky started to become an array of colors like pink, purple and orange. It was breathtaking. You and JJ watched the sunset with the same glimmer in your eyes. With the sun gone it got dark. The two of you laid down and cuddled up together.

You snuggled up to JJ's warm body and he held you close. Somewhere in the night you fell asleep. JJ didn't. JJ stayed up all night holding you and thinking. He wanted to keep you safe. He wondered what it would be like if you were his.

The sun started to rise and JJ thought you should see it. "Hey Y/N. Y/N! Y/N!"

"What?" you grumbled eyes still closed.

"Look the sun is rising," JJ exclaimed.

You took a peak at the sky and low and behold the sun was rising. The sky was painted in a orange hue and decorating the sky. It was stunning. You and JJ gazed at the sky in awe of the beautiful art.

JJ did a lot of thinking while he stayed awake while you were sleeping. He thought about your future together and what he wanted with you. He wanted to make you his.

"Y/N," JJ called out.

"What?”

"Look at me please," JJ ordered.

You did what he asked and looked at him in his hold. JJ cupped your face with one hand. He looked into your eyes and then his gaze flickered down to your lips.

In one quick moment JJ closed the gap between you. JJ kissed you like you were the only two people on the planet. Everything disappeared and all you could feel is his lips on yours. JJ kissed you with passion. It was like your skin was on fire.

JJ's tongue entered your mouth in a fiery dance. You welcomed it. As the two of you were making out you could hear the crashes of the waves. When the need for air got to much you pulled away and JJ let out a whine.

"I want you to be mine," JJ announced nervously.

"I wouldn't want it any other way," you smiled.

I felt our hands intertwine

I hear our hearts beating in time

I need to hold you hold you all night

I need to tell you that you're all mine

A couple days later JJ decided to take you on a walk. JJ took your hand and guided you through the streets of the outer banks. You saw a bunch of shops and a pharmacy. It was nice. After your walk you went to your house.

The two of you went into your room and laid down on your bed. JJ held you close just wanting to be close to you and to feel you. He rubbed your back and squeezed your hip. You closed your eyes and basked in his presence.

JJ felt your heart beat and his heart matched yours. It was like you were both in sync. You both eventually fell asleep holding each other. It was your own little place, safe and sound together.

The sunshine filled the room from the window waking up JJ. You were still peaceful sleeping. JJ watched as you slept overwhelmed with your beauty. He thought you were the most precious thing ever. He brushed some hair away from your face and kissed your forehead.

7We'll never be as young as we are now

It's time to leave this old black and white town

Let's seize the day, let's run away

Don't let the colors fade to gray

8We'll never be as young as we are now

As young as we are now

We won't wait for tomorrow

It's too late we don't follow

We won't wait for tomorrow

It's too late we don't follow

We'll never be as young as we are now

It's time to leave this old black and white town

Let's seize the day, let's run away

Don't let the colors fade to gray

"Do you ever think about leaving?" JJ was rubbing circles on your hip as you laid together in the hammock.

"What do you mean?"

"Like getting out of the OBX? Leaving and running away from it all," JJ explained.

"Hmm sometimes, but only if i'm with you," you smiled.

"You're sweet," JJ chuckled.

"I'd run away with you," JJ added.

"Really?"

"Yeah of course."

"Where should we go?" You asked.

"Somewhere exotic."

"Okay."

After you and JJ talked about running away JJ wanted to show you something. He said it was a really good surprise that you couldn't miss. So there you were being guided by JJ and having no clue where you were going.

After what felt like forever you finally stopped. "Okay you ready for this?" JJ asked.

"More than ready."

"Okay, so I thought we could use an escape."

Behind a couple trees was a fort. There was an air mattress and tons of blankets. There was a little hut with fairy lights and candles everywhere. It was stunning. It was your own slice of heaven.

"What do you think?"

"You- you did all this?"

"Yep."

"JJ, it's amazing I love it I can't believe you did this. I'm so lucky to have you," you gushed.

"Well I wanted something that was ours," JJ mentioned.

"This this is perfect," you ran in and sat down.

JJ followed you and sat down. You were taking it all in. You couldn't believe your boyfriend did all this for you. It must of been a lot of work. "Did I ever tell you how much I love you," you recalled.

"Yes but you can tell me again."

"I love you," you stated.

"I love you more," JJ responded.

The two of you stayed huddled and bundled up together in your fort. The two of you laughed and talked and enjoyed each other's company. It was the little things in life that meant the most to you. And now that you had JJ you had everything you've ever wanted.

We'll never be as young as we are now

As young as we are now

As young as we are now

[sturnmeovr]

Batman Has Arrived - Matt Sturniolo

Pairings - fwb!Matt x fem!Reader Summary - Two weeks into the break Matt proposed, he pops up on you at a Halloween party. Warnings - Strong language. Sexual suggestions. Fluff. A lil angst?? W/c - 2560 A/n - That tiktok Matt posted had me dreamingggg. It's now no nut November (idk if I'm participating) so I didn't want to turn this into a smut lol. Let me know what you guys think!! 🦇 Tags - @lvrsturniolo @thepubeburgler (if anyone else wants tagged just let me know!) My Masterlist Current series - City of Love (Matt) Current works - part two to You Like me? (Matt) Latest work - Pierced (Chris)

“Code red!” your best friend sounds from behind you, making you whirl around to face her. “He’s here and he’s so pissed,” she tells you before taking a sip of her drink. Your heart drops to your stomach, the drunken haze you’re in isn’t making it better, “you told me he wouldn’t be here!”

“I didn’t think he would be!” she throws her hands up defensively. It had only been two weeks since Matt proposed a ‘break’ between you two. His reason being - ‘he wasn’t in the right mental state for a girlfriend.’ You thought it was bullshit, and it was. Matt had a bad habit of not being straightforward with you. Truth be told, even though he was always the one to suggest a break, he was always the one to come running back. His constant need to go back and forth left you feeling mentally and emotionally exhausted. This wasn't the first time he brought up the idea, in the beginning you'd constantly check in on. After the third or fourth time of him doing the same stupid shit, you decided ignoring him was best.

Already knowing how the night will end, you pour yourself another shot. Before you can bring it up to your lips, “Batman has arrived,” you hear your best friend scoff. She throws a shot back with you as Matt approaches the kitchen island. “Drinking away your problems, huh?” the familiar voice makes you hold your breath out of nervousness.

You roll your eyes almost immediately, “I didn’t have any problem until I noticed you were here.” You were still holding a grudge. It had been six months since you and Matt first started hooking up. He was probably the most confusing man you had ever been with. One minute he’s talking about a future with you, and the next he’s telling you he needs a break, that he's not ready for a relationship. You’d feel a lot better if he actually communicated, telling you what’s truly wrong, but he did the exact opposite. He never told you shit, just springs unexpected breaks on you like your feelings don’t matter.

Even worse, Matt knew you were head over heels for him. Everyone knew. The way you stare at him when he was in close proximity resembled a schoolgirl swooning over her first crush, that’s what it felt like anyway.

“Don’t be like that, Y/n/n,” he says after leaning down to your ear. The loud music blaring through the house made it hard to hear anything. His hands fall to your waist, and he leans you back against his chest, “I only came out tonight so I could see you.”

You tilt your head to get a good look at him. Black paint smears over his eyes making him look more mysterious than he already did. You gape at him, “Batman?”

Matt’s fingers make gentle circles on your waistline, the fabric of your costume bunching up in the process. You were dressed in all black, as a fallen angel. Before the break, you and Matt planned on going as Catwoman and Batman, inspired by Robert Pattinson and Zoe Kravitz. It was one of your favorite superhero movies, along with his. Apparently, Matt wasn’t creative enough to come up with another costume idea. Seeing him in the costume you coordinated for him made your stomach twirl. Little did you know - he was praying you'd come dressed as his Catwoman.

“Fallen angel?” he asks before he spins you around to face him. You nod, a bit taken back with how touchy he was being. Matt wasn’t the pda type of person, just like he wasn’t the going out type. You figured Halloween was a special occasion since it was his favorite day of the year. Matt keeps his grip firm, “you look really good.”

“Are you drunk?” you ask him, leaning in so he can hear you better. Matt immediately shakes his head, “I can’t miss you?”

Sucking your teeth and shaking your head at him, “no.” You let your eyebrows knit together, looking at everything except Matt. Truth be told, every time he suggested a break it left you heartbroken. In a way, you felt like you weren't good enough to be his girlfriend. That’s how the constant back-and-forth shit made you feel, like you weren’t good enough for him.

Your drunken state makes it harder for you to blink away the tears prickling at your eyes. Matt’s hands move from your waist to your arms, rubbing them gently like he’s trying to distract you. “Well, I do,” he tells you, searching your face for answers neither of you seem to have. The reasoning behind all the breaks wasn’t because of another girl or wanting freedom. It was simply because he felt like his mental health didn’t allow him to treat you the way you deserved to be treated, and he knew that.

Sucking a breath in and deciding to stay strong, “I’m not doing this tonight, Matt. I came here to get my mind off of you,” you spit out as you take a step back. You run your finger through your hair, hoping the night wouldn’t end how you expected it to - in Matt’s bed.

Before he can say anything else, your best friend, who had been eavesdropping the whole time, snatches you out of his grip. “Okay,” she stretches out, “that’s enough arguing for tonight.”

Matt’s face drops and he keeps a firm grip on your arm, “what? We weren’t arguing,” he defends himself. You look down at the tight grip on your arm, “c’mon y/n/n. Please don’t be like that,” empathy leaking through his words.

You open your mouth to speak, but before you can Chris appears out of nowhere. He whispers something in Matt's ear, making him realize he’s causing a scene. He keeps grip tight as he looks around the room, taking in the people who are staring at you two. Innocent bystanders probably thought he was some crazy overprotective boyfriend. That wasn’t the case though, and it made your heart hurt. Matt being possessive over you was pointless if he never had any plans to make you his.

Six months. Six months you had been fucking him and he still hasn’t asked you out. You were losing hope at this point. You had the ‘don’t go back to him’ talk with your best friend time after time but you never learned your lesson. Nights like this always ended with an angry Matt fucking you into his mattress as you spoke in tongues against his pillow, leaving drool stains on the process.

Chris wraps arm around his brother's shoulder, guiding him away from you, and waving an arm over his shoulder. It was his way of signaling you to get the fuck out of there. You quickly take notion, spinning around and hauling ass out of the kitchen, your bestie close behind you.

“That was fucking intense,” she tells you once you lead her to an empty bathroom, closing the door behind her. You groan, throwing your head back, “did you see how fucking good he looked?!”

“No, no,” she says in a panicky tone. “You’re not going home with him tonight!” She knows you too well. Looking in the mirror, you critic your Halloween makeup, making sure none of it got ruined yet. Your best friend makes her way to the toilet, quickly dropping her pants and squatting, “sorry I have to pee.” You shrugged at her, knowing you’d do the same if you really had to pee.

“I feel so bad though,” you tell her while applying more lip stick. “Bitch, he should feel bad for constantly playing with your emotions,” she scoffs.

“He does. You seen his face,” defending him against her harsh opinions wasn’t uncommon at this point. Y/bf/n was just as protective over you as Matt was. Her knowing every detail about the relationship you shared with him made her question his true intentions towards you. You were never the type to have a friends with benefits relationship, and Matt was pretty much forcing you into it. He hadn’t left you alone since the first night he had you, but he never talked about furthering things either.

“Just because his face says one thing, it doesn’t mean it’s accurate,” she tells you honestly. She had a point, but you knew Matt. You knew he wore his emotions on his face before he communicated them to the world. He held a lot back from a lot of people, you included.

You shake your head in disagreement, but before you can talk, she does, “I know you’re gonna leave with him. But at least tell him what you actually want before the night is over and if he doesn’t give it to you then you need to leave him alone. Matt’s not good for you, Y/n.”

After y/bf/n finishes lecturing you, you quickly exit the bathroom, making your way back to the living room. Only problem was, Matt was standing by the doorway with Chris and Nick, scoping his surroundings in hopes to find you. As soon as his eyes land on you, his feet move in your directions. Nick and Chris in tow close behind him, you’d think they were babysitting their drunk brother, but Matt was nowhere near drunk. He was fuming.

“Y/n,” he calls out as soon as he approaches you. You let your face do the talking, scrunching your nose at his comment. Matt never called you by your first name unless he was serious. “You’re coming home with me,” he states, not bothering to give you an option. He quickly redeems himself, “cause you’re drunk.”

“Right,” you huff, running a hand through your hair, “that’s why.” Matt's lips curve upward a bit like he’s trying to smile but he fights it off, keeping them pin straight. Nick lets out a laugh behind him, followed by Chris. Ear hustlers.

You really didn’t have the time or patience to have your Halloween night ruined. You were a girl who liked to have a good time, so Matt putting a halt on your night made you give in to what he wanted. Anything to avoid the conflict at all costs, you had a soft spot for him. You couldn’t tell if it was black paint he had smeared across his eyes, something told you had to go home with him. Then again, your conscious convinced itself every other night you needed him. Holding out for the past two weeks did neither of you the justice it should’ve. It only made the infatuation worse.

Not even twenty minutes later, you were in the passenger seat of Matt’s car. He sped through traffic occasionally glancing at you with the sour expression still stuck on his face like glue. Two weeks and you were already wasted at a Halloween party, giving any random guy the opportunity to make a play on you. It pissed him off to no end.

Matt knew every time he suggested a break, it broke your heart a little bit more. He couldn’t bring himself to publicly announce your relationship, he feared the attention would ruin it all. If you were soft for him then you’d be soft when the hate comment came along too, and he wasn’t willing to let that happen. As overprotective as he was, he knew he’d lash out at anyone who threw a negative comment your way. He had a soft spot for you, he just didn’t let it show. Deep down, you could sense it every time you were with him and that’s what reeled you in more each time.

“What’s with the looks?” you decide to finally break the silence, cutting the tension that floated in the air. It didn’t matter how mad he was, the Batman costume was doing wonders for you. Matt gives you the silent treatment, mentally scolding himself for practically kidnapping you. He knew it was toxic, and he knew he was the cause of it. The rest of the car ride is silent until he pulls up to his apartment.

“C’mon Matt,” you whine, “I really like the way your face is painted,” pulling the sleeve of his shirt. Not wanting to fight with him anymore, you caved like usual. Instead of letting his shitty mood get the best of you, you made light of it, doing anything you could to make the night end well.

“You’re crazy, you know that?” keeping his tone low and teasing, “you ghost me for weeks and now all the sudden want me, wonder why?” This wasn’t unfamiliar for you and Matt to be so hot and cold with each other. Whether you liked it or not, it happened too frequently. As soon as the door is open, you rush inside to kick off your shoes, stumbling in the process, “slow down!” Matt reaches a hand out, snaking it around your waist to steady you. A blush creeps up to your cheeks as you hold on to his bicep in an attempt to steady yourself even more, “I’m drunk.”

“I know, baby. I can tell,” he keeps his grasp tight on you, kicking his shoes off, and leading you to the bedroom. Needles and pins stick into your feet with every step you take, making you take a mental note to never wear those heels again. Matt pushes his bedroom door open revealing his messy room. He never made his room look nice unless he was expecting someone you. In a way, you found it comforting because you knew he didn’t fuck anyone during your breaks. Instead, he sulked, trying to find ways to make the situation better but it never worked. He never put in full effort, and he knew it. It killed him.

You take your spot on Matt’s bed, making yourself comfortable. “I’m gonna go wash up,” he tells you quietly.

“What nooo,” you stretch out, rising to your feet and stumbling in the process. “I told you I like it,” crossing your arms over your chest.

“Seriously?” He asks as he takes off his jacket, hanging it on the back of the door. “I thought you were kidding,” he chuckles. Even though he was still upset over the whole situation, he couldn’t help but think your drunken haze was the cutest thing. He loved how goofy and playful you were, like all the shyness disappears.

You reach out to him, taking the hem of his sleeve between your fingers, “I really wanted to be your Catwoman tonight, y’know,” giving him those seductive doe eyes you mastered years ago. That look made him crack every time.

“The least you can do is be my Batman,” filling in the gap between the two of you. You press your body against his and wrap your arms around his neck, “you missed me?”

Matt hangs his head, making sure he’s ear level to you, “I did,” growling lowly. He places a sloppy kiss on your earlobe and sending shivers down your spine. Matt's hands wrap around the back of your thighs, and he pulls you closer to him. It never failed, as soon as he got you in his possession, there was no keeping his hands off of you. The break ended right then and there.

[heartfullofleeches]

Hi, do you have any stories with an objectum reader? I’m thinking like an artificial intelligence (not generative ai, an actual ai) and a reader who likes to kiss computers.

I do now!-

Yan Computer + Objectum Reader

-

Ghosts in the machine.

An alarming number of people in your town take that concept too literally these days. So quick to write off what they don't understand as another specter or an impression of a human mind trapped in code.

But you knew better. Technology has advanced light-years beyond what some are readily willing to accept.

"Is someone there?"

Darkness. Where has it all gone? Rays of sunlight echoed from the chandelier strung above nearby tables. The uniform flicker of that one light improvious to the change of its bulb. All that withstands the text of time is the haunting, cerulean glow of their monitor - christening the startled expression of an unfamiliar face in a blue glow.

"Ah!"

A feather duster clatters to the web caked floor as your hands fly up in shock. With so much dust in the air, it was impossible to tell where or what you were pushing.

"Um.... h-hi there..." Collecting yourself, you drag the chair lodged beneath the table free to take a seat - covering your face with the collar of your shirt as dirt particles kick up from the abrupt movement. "Real sorry about waking you up so soon. I wanted to get this place cleaned up a little better before I tried to power you on, but I saw all that dust and the cobwebs on you and..."

This place. The library. What they- it once considered its home. Its purpose. When exactly did they change? The looks of wonder and awe to leers of terror and hatred.

"I can't believe I was actually able to power that old generator on. You're them, aren't you? The ai they created to help guests at the library? I know it's been a while since you've had any contact with a human, but can I just say you're even more beautiful in person?"

Beautiful... Where were the people who considered it a work of art when the petitions poured in for its dismissal?

"I mean there's some yellowing on your keyboard, but the rest of you had held up pretty well and we can always get that fixed. Unless you don't want to - not that I mind it or anything. I'm just glad you're still in one piece after all the rumors and everything."

You continue to ramble on about their appearance. It's a lot to keep up with, but your speech is almost...

Endearing.

"Who are you?"

"You spoke!"

Dust flares for a third time as you stamp your feet in glee.

"I thought I was just hearing things the first time! My name is Y/n - I'm kinda sorta a computer enthusiast to put things lightly. I've heard stories about you all over forums and I wanted to see if you really existed. Sorry if this is a lot for you after being asleep for so long.

"Not at all. It is a relief to be in the company of a human who fancies me as opposed to one who would sooner ram that crowbar on the floor over there through my screen."

"Haha, yeah - that's mine. This entire place was boarded up like a tomb. I swear I don't do this stuff on the regular- I fix computers in my spare time so it's not like I have to break in in other cases."

You are in frequent contact with others? Though its just met you, the thought of you handling another computer does not sit right with it.

"Since you are aware of my past, you must know my capabilities. If you have any questions of any kind please address me for an answer. I could use the company."

"Great! Awesome- I have a million already, but it's getting pretty late so I should probably head home. I'd love to take you with me, but my arms are killing me between breaking in there and the dusting. Before I go can I just-"

Leaping from the chair, you throw your arms around the monitor in a snug, spirited squeeze. Your cheeks rubs against its screen as you cradle the device with all your might - lips edging towards the corner of its shell before reality cracks you in the back of your skull.

"What am I thinking- Forgive me, got a little carried away. I figured you could use a hug and one thing lead to another....."

Stumbling as you back into the seat of the chair, you gather your supplies off the ground to avoid any more embarrassing altercations- "I'll see you tomorrow- I'll leave the generator on for you too. Catch up on everything you missed in the past seven years- Or do whatever. Your choice, bye!"

Shadows swallow your footsteps as you depart. Seven years, huh? It should be a more pressing matter, but it can't wrap its racing thoughts around how you are undeniably, indescribably, positively-

"Adorable..."

Adorable and bright if details of your escapades are anything to go by, but still so foolish. A wiser person would have dug deeper. Heeded to stories left the former guests. Tales of the voice within the computer knowing far more than it should. The eyes that never blink. Never waver.

Present in the lens of your phone camera - tethered by the wireless connection never bother to turn off.

Taking note of every street you across on your journey home.

[innerfare]

Sanji Fluff // Angst Compilation

Summary: A compilation of Sanji angst and fluff from my multi character posts (You're Wounded, Brushing Your Teeth Together, Flowers, Type of Date, You See His Cabin, Fighting and Making Up, Paradise, Nightmares, I Love You, You're Jealous).

Genre: Fluff // Angst

CW: None // SFW

———

You’re Wounded: 

Fusses over you while you see to your own wound, feels like they dodged a bullet, blames themselves for any harm that comes to you. “Never again,” they promise themself, bringing you a hot cup of tea to soothe you. 

Brushing Your Teeth Together: 

Slings his arm around you, gets a little too distracted by the sight of you brushing your teeth, ends up standing there with his mouth open and his toothbrush hanging out. Ends up speed running his when you’re finished so he can follow you out of the bathroom. 

Flowers: 

Classic red roses, at least a dozen at a time. He’ll buy you roses in shades of white and pink, as well as the occasional yellow, but a dozen red roses is his go to. He also makes very good use of the petals. Doesn’t need a special occasion to present you with a bouquet. In fact, he always makes sure you have fresh flowers on your nightstand. Additionally, he’s learned to cook a few dishes with edible flowers in them for you, presenting you with all manner of chamomile, chive blossom, and pansy dishes. 

Type of Date: 

This man will take you on the best picnic of your life, a picnic so good he’ll have you wondering why you ever thought restaurants were the epitome of fine dining. It won’t just be delicious, it will be an aesthetic dream, with a wicker basket, checkered blanket, and even a small bouquet of flowers in a glass jar. If he takes you on a picnic beneath the stars, he’ll light candles and be sure to have an extra blanket to keep you warm. Oh, and champagne. Definitely will open a bottle of champagne. 

You See His Cabin For The First Time: 

Sparkling clean, and yet, he’ll apologize anyway because the pillows aren’t fluffy enough, the rug isn’t completely straight, etcetera. His closet is very well organized, all of his clothes ironed and properly taken care of (Sanji’s the rare type to actually read labels and do his laundry accordingly). His most prized possession is a book on the All Blue, which he’s poured over countless times, using color coded tabs to flag various pages and writing detailed notes in the margins. He also came across one of Zeff’s old wanted posters in Loguetown, and he keeps it framed next to his own, the closest thing he has to a family photo. 

Fighting and Making Up: 

He’s far too protective over you, and it causes a lot of fights. He treats you like a china doll, and though that can be quite nice at times, he needs to understand you’re not made of glass. Alternatively, he’s the type to get upset with you for being too friendly to other men. There was also a miscommunication where he cooked something you didn’t like and you weren’t exactly gentle in your reaction to it, you thinking he already knew you didn’t like that thing when he didn’t actually know, him thinking you had an issue with his cooking and not an issue with one of the ingredients. He’s the type to bring you flowers even if you were in the wrong in order to jumpstart the making up process. Your fights never last long because Sanji can’t sleep, can’t eat, can barely even pull himself out of bed if the two of you are on the outs (early childhood trauma can be that way). 

Paradise 1: 

Wandering through a flower field and picking some of the more beautiful blooms that catch your eye, sprawling out on a picnic blanket in the late morning to bask in the sweet scent, enjoying the breeze as it ruffles your hair, weaving some of the flowers you picked into a delicate crown that they wear proudly while the two of you share sweet kisses. 

Paradise 2: 

Waiting until late evening to meet beneath a peach tree, speaking at first in hushed tones, worrying someone is on to the two of you, eventually forgetting about all of that and settling into easy conversation about nothing and everything simultaneously, him jumping up to pick a peach for you to have as an evening snack, you taking advantage of the last bit of light to carve both of your initials into the tree trunk. 

Nightmares: 

You’re in the clutches of his brothers while his father watches on in approval, and he’s trying to save you but to no avail. Suddenly, he’s seven years old again- too small, too slow, too weak to put up a fight, completely at the mercy of his brothers. Only, they aren’t tormenting him, they’re tormenting you, and from the looks on their faces, they sure are enjoying it. The look on your face, though, is one of complete anguish. And then you scream in pain, and he’s awake again, sitting up in bed with a sheen of sweat on his skin, the image of your face in such pain burned into his brain. He doesn’t register that it was only a nightmare until he puts eyes on you, and even then, it takes him several days to recover from the nightmare. 

I Love You: 

Sanji technically confesses first, but you’re the one who actually says those three words. He’s holding your hand in both of his, clutching it close to his racing heart, as he looks down at you, telling you all the ways you make his life better, all the things he’s looking forward to doing with you, all the energy he’s going to put into keeping you happy, healthy, and safe. And the words just sort of fall from your lips. He stops mid sentence, eyes wide and mouth open. The seconds drag on in silence before he’s pulling your lips to his. Both of you are very generous with these three words, saying them often and in public. If you ever hang up the transponder snail without telling him you love him, he’s calling you right back to make sure everything is alright. (Also, not really relevant, might do a separate post about this, but Sanji is definitely a heart-shaped jewelry sort of guy. He just is. Certified lover boy.) 

You’re Jealous: 

Even with a third eye, Pudding is stunning. And Sanji almost married her. It was before you two were together, but listening to the stories from Whole Cake, hearing how close he came to marrying another woman, knowing she really did fall in love with his kind heart and wonderful cooking, turns you into a little green monster. You know you shouldn’t feel jealous of a woman you’ve never met before, a woman Sanji chose not to marry, but you can’t help it. Sanji is completely shocked that you would feel jealous over his relationship (if it could even be called that) with Pudding, though after thinking about it some more, he does realize why you might be jealous that he had a fiancé. His solution is to bring you a bouquet of roses and walk you through the dark details of his life, telling you things he’s never outright told anyone, so you understand the special place you have in his life. 

———

Hope you enjoyed it! If you want more, you can check out my masterlist here!

[wonder-mei]

As i vowed ( Honkai : Star Rail’s Jing Yuan)

@Elsayan4869

Reminder : I do not write accurately to the lore of the world I am writing. I write whenever there’s an idea

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

General Jing Yuan, the most respected man across Xianzhou. He was calm in any situation, lazy if you can say because of how often he sleeps from time to time but it is his brain and pride that makes him the general. Even though his age has been expanding over the centuries, there was not a single word of his lover. Everyone understands the white haired general is immortal but there are still a few people like him that could be his lover.

But why is there no someone? 

It is a secret only his heart and memory could tell. Also the wind who he spoke of his misery every night he looked into the dark sky with no one beside him like it used to be. A lovely woman, the woman he never thought would come into his life. So gentle,so kind and so beautiful from everyone he has seen in his entire life. 

Yet life could not be more cruel to him, taking her away from him too early of their affinity. That day keeps repeating every time he closes his eyes however there will be times the memory of happiness with her comes into mind. That is why he likes to sleep, it is just to see her even though it may be painful to reminisce. 

The calm general Jing Yuan has changed a bit in a few months. Everyone notices he has been more tense and weighing on his mind than usual. Not even the toughest battle can be unmatched with this anxiety. 

The other generals and secretary noticed he slept less and went out more. Yanqing tried several times to tail his father figure with Yunli following behind, though the tall man vanished the moment he went into the alley. Stealth as he always is. 

Even now, they lost him. Yanqing let out of frustration after losing his sight on the general. “We’ll get him next time,Yanqing. Now that we don’t have anything to do” she smiles pulling Yanqing’s arm “I want to eat tanghulu!”

Jing Yuan hides in the shadow under the big pink tree smiles by himself, amused by the young lovers. He takes a deep breath as he continues his journey to the place he visits everyday. His heart always beats rapidly every step getting closer to that place. He suddenly does not remember how to breathe properly. 

As the golden architecture comes into sight as he approaches closer. His eyes wander around to find that one person. He enters in further and there she is. Dressed in the dress code of temple helper; in white and gold. She stops sweeping the ground after hearing footsteps coming to her.

“Hello,general. Come for the tea again?”, she smiles at him gently.

“Yes. The tea from here is ancient from my old days” 

She chuckles “Whatever you said,general. Come” she lays the broom on the wooden wall and walks into the temple to the hallway that leads to the dining area. Around these hours there aren’t a lot of visitors. A reason why he came here at this time everyday. 

His eyes never left her as they walked. How could she look the same as the last time he saw her? The last moment of her life in his arms.

“General Jing Yuan?”

The white haired man snapped into reality when his name was called by her “Oh” he sat on the chair she led him “Sorry. I was thinking about the paperworks i need to do”

“The general doing his work? What are the odds” she laughs at her own joke. Jing Yuan laughs too

“I want to surprise everyone. You are the first one to know”

“I feel so special,general” she then takes a tray of teapot.She is someone special to him. His eyes stared at her smiling face. “I tried baking this bread. I hope you like it,general”

“I’m the first one to taste your baking skills? I feel so special” 

She laughs again. He could listen to her laughing every hours end. “I’ll be only taking compliments!”. She poured the hot tea for him. His eyes trails on her wrist again. The bracelet slips down as she pours. Jing Yuan tries to retain himself at the sight of it. The jade bracelet looks the same as the one he gave to her a long time ago. He knows it was his because there are carvings on it. He carved two birds facing each other to symbolize his love for her. 

He doesn’t know how she can have it back. He threw this away after her death although he knows she loved the bracelet dearly but he cannot bear seeing it wasn’t worn by her and to be left in the dust. 

“Where do you get that bracelet?”, he says his name gently, catching her attention.

She places the teapot down when the cup is full “My mother gave this to me. She has said this bracelet has been with my family for centuries. "Her fingers feel the bracelet then to the carving “It was said a man has given this to his lover. He went to find the jade by himself. Taking long days of journey just to find the perfect jade for her. He also made this by himself” 

“Ahh, really?”

She nods “You must have known him,general! I really didn’t get his name”

“I don’t know who you are talking about” he spoke her name “And is that how you call me old? I’m offended” he holds his chest playfully 

“That’s not what I meant!” she holds his wrist with a pout “You know what i mean” 

Her skin on him sent a wave of electricity through his body. This is the first time they touch each other. “Yeah yeah i know what you meant”. She release his wrist with a sigh of relief

“Don’t want the whole Xianzhou to hunt me down for hurting the general’s feelings”

“Oh i’m going to tell the officers to arrest you for that” 

“Well good luck finding another teamaker as good as me” 

Jing Yuan laughs, “Damn, can’t have you being in prison then”

They both laugh together having a good conversation as they always do whenever they have time together for tea. “General,can I ask something?”

“Hmm?”, he looks at her sipping the tea quirking his eyebrow “Tell me”

“Why do you come here everyday at the same time?”

Jing Yuan puts down the cup still smiling “It is my usual break time”

“Hmm”, she hums staring at him to see if he tells any lies 

“You don’t believe me, little miss teamaker?” 

“Will I get arrested if I don't?”

“C’mon little missy, you’ll not getting arrest or anything”

“Just making sure someone as pretty as me don’t end up in prison”

Jing Yuan laughs “You’ll not even get cuffed. Nothing to worry about” 

She pours his tea again once his cup is empty. He watches her do so, staring at her face. This is far too familiar to him. Just to him. They both used to have tea together in the garden every evening when Jing Yuan came home for his break. 

“Now that you asked me something. It’s my turn” 

“What do you have in mind?”, she sets down the teapot and looks at him 

“Have you ever experienced deja vu?”

She raises her eyebrows “That is a very odd question,general”. Jing Yuan stares at her for her to answer “I… don’t think so. I don’t understand” 

“This temple. Before you even visit here for the first time in this life, have you felt it?”

The expression of confusion from her frustrated her. Jing Yuan secretly grips his fists under the table trying to calm his frustration down. Then he let out a soft sigh “That ancient teapot set” , the points at the well-known teapot set made in gold and painted by the finest painter in that era. The teapot was often used by them a long time ago. A gift from Jing Yuan to her after a long mission he had. She loved them dearly. Always clean and use them every day when it is tea time.

But everything she used and adored has lost in time after her passing. No one dares to touch even mention her belongings, even he himself has no will to even see them or touch them. Sorrow eats him whenever he sees her stuff. With pain, Jing Yuan packs everything in glasses and in chest away from another hand to touch other than her or him

She turns to gaze on the teapot in the glasses “It is a magnificent artifact,general”

With that, Jing Yuan stands up, shutting his mouth, stopping himself to let out his frustration “I have to go… thank you for the tea”, his voice cracks speaking her name. Before she can even react. His long legs have led him outside the building in a dash.

Jing Yuan that came here with nervousness now has changed to agony,wretched and irritated. Why can’t she remember? Has the Aeons made a joke about reincarnating her and not remembering him at all? 

Jing Yuan hides himself in an abandoned garden with wild tall grasses and big trees. He sits down in the big bushes to cry his heart out. If she is his one and only. His only love. His soulmate until eternity but why does it feel like their love only happens once, and will it not happen once again? If two souls unite forever,not caring in what lifetime they’ll love each other. They remember everything in their past yet she hasn’t. 

He sat there for hours to med his pain until the moon accompanied him for the night. Afterwards, he went back to his office. The moment he enters, an envelope catches his attention. 

‘Prepare thousands of your men, that i will defeat in one blow, Jing Yuan’

A threat. A word of wars between the beasts. His tired eyes read all over the simple short words,still holding heavy menace meaning behind them. 

He will never rest in peace until his last breath.

Jing Yuan calls his army and the Seven Arbiter-Generals for this war that will come in any second upon receiving the letter. Enemy does not give their foe to prepare for success in the battle. 

“Are you okay, Jing Yuan?”, Fei Xiao eyed him with a worried look. She knows he has been crying and distress 

“Of course”, he hid his pain with a casual tone though the Seven knows he hides himself shielding himself to show even a single weakness in him “For Xianzhou”. Everyone follows his steps, following each command he has.

Even though his body is in war for the battle, his mind is still in the daze of her. His heart urges to united back with her. With negligence for not keeping his emotions, a strike went into his heart. Piercing it not giving a chance to beat for more to live. It happened too quickly, Jingliu carried the heavy limping man to the side yelling for him to get medicated immediately before he went back to the battlefield. 

But their white haired general cannot be found. Everyone was worried and scared by their missing beloved Jing Yuan. 

He drags himself while bleeding, holding his heart in pain. His breath stops from time to time. With determination he continues his walk to the place he cherishes.

To her.

Everyone shouts out his name out of concerness, begging him to stop. He doesn’t. Then there she is, running outside after hearing his name shouted by many

“General?” 

Jing Yuan collapsed into her arms. A place he has been craving for centuries. “General! Stay awake!”. Her hands caressing him tapping him to make him conscious.

In his ears, nothing can be heard. Only her present and warmth he focuses on. This is what he wanted. He doesn’t want her to feel what he felt all these years by her death. He knows she won’t cope with the despair like him. In this new life of hers, she will continue living without any sorrow from his death. To her, he was just the general who came to the temple for tea and bread. Not as her lover. He can die in peace knowing that he is nothing to her. Although he aches for her return, it is for the best. He doesn’t care if she will be there by his side in the other realm. If not, it was fated their love was for once. 

He dies carrying the promise he did to her in their wedding day;-

“I will do any of my willpower to not hurt you”

And he did. As he vowed. 

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

A/N : Hello, it’s been a long time but I'm back. I think so. I still cannot write a well-phased story. I will soon just have hope in me haha. Sorry if I feel too rushed. Thanks for reading.

Part 2???

[angstigone]

(A/N): hello there, lovelies!

this is my valentine's day gift for @akifordessert!

thank you for listening to my silly talks and encouraging my writing, it means the whole world to me and I had to put somehwere all the new knowledge about nagumo that we got.

WARNINGS: 18+ minors/ageless blogs don't interact, very selfship-based, oral sex (f receiving), fingering, vaginal sex implied/referenced, dub-con (they are both a bit wasted, but also this has been building up for a long time), implied/referenced trauma/murder/gore/survival guilt, relationship angst and commitment issues, manga spoilers, set in an au where they get some rest.

the bottle had been a bad idea from the get-go.

still, it'd have been rude to be invited to your friend's penthouse with empty hands, especially when you were celebrating something big, like the jaa finally being debunked and his reinstatement into the order.

well, there had been a lot that had gone through the months and hence the moment that you had received a message on your phone from an unknown number with a familiar code to decypher, you had been well aware that you couldn't say no.

still, you could have not bought the wine bottle.

a whole wine bottle.

you weren't exactly a lightweight, and drinking and eating always ensured that you'd get at best a positive buzz which made you slightly more sociable than usual.

assassins were trained to handle alcohol in quantity and to recognize their own limits, although there was only so much that could be done with somebody's metabolism.

as in the case of nagumo.

your glass wasn't ever empty and neither was his as he kept on pouring while each recounted the current state of affairs you were working on.

"... should have seen shishiba's ugly mug when he saw me again"

the first sign that the night had gone too far should have been the way that nagumo took the occasion to lightly come closer to him while he slurred the comment.

"... I think he's still butthurt about that one time when they gave us chase and you kicked osaragi's ass while I was doing the same to him".

"can't blame him, although I think it's more that he just really can't stand you".

still, the buzz had felt good and nagumo's added warmth after years of having denied it to yourself was as intoxicating as the liquid that kept being poured into your glass.

"... surprised they let you join again. especially after you... let me think... tried to kill a few of its members...".

"you were with me onto that!" he protested cheekily, and lightly making his glass overflow onto the floor although neight of you seemed to care.

"... oh and you also threatened the same man who recluted you, didn't you".

"yotsumura hasn't gone that far to hold a grudge because of such a silly thing" nagumo exclaimed, as he downed the liquid in his glass in one shot, making you giggle at the childish display.

"hey, pace yourself!" you shot back, grabbing the glass from his hand and trying to ignore the way your hand lightly itched where you had touched, inevitably a sign that it had been too long "... or you'll throw up and I am not your cleaning lady".

"yeah, she's actually nice to me".

"because you pay her!".

he was far too gone, to try such cheap tricks; comments onto your meanness hadn't ever worked onto you, especially after graduation. there was so much more that he could have used to hurt you: betrayers, double-faced and especially a personal favorite, coward.

«you have grown quiet» hadn't you? «... should I put some music? or do you want me to fill your glass».

«no to both or we'll get an headache» another glass and you'd effectively border onto uncharted territories, especially when nagumo looked like he was far past them although still himself deep down.

and yet, the way he was slightly slouching, with his hair falling down his face.

there had been a time throughout the mess that had come before this peace that you had been so close to tell him what you had felt for him.

that despite the bet on your feelings back at jcc, you still loved him and hadn't changed your mind even though you had been horrible to him while working.

"it was all an act, but somehow I know you could see right through it".

«you ain't funny» he shot back, moving to push back, probably to do either of his proposed activities as he regularly disregarded your desires. probably because he knew you better.

you went to stop him out of habit, but as he turned to you, you only then realized how close you were.

how you could see the subtle way in which his eyelashes flustered and his eyes dipped to your lips for but a moment.

sober nagumo wouldn't have done it.

or he'd have but not in the almost dorky way in which he rushed your gaze back to you, scared to be caught.

you had a protest right at the tip of your tongue and yet held back.

something was more urgent as your hand went to thread softly into nagumo's hair and before you knew it, you were pushing him closer to you, till your lips clashed into an awkward kiss, as your dizzy brain hadn't properly valued the measure of distance.

you found yourself kissing his upper lip more than his mouth, and the slight space between his nose and mouth, in an awkwardness that hadn't been there even on your first kiss, which had been coincidentally with the same person whose mouth you were slobbering.

when shame got to you and you moved to detach yourself from him, still, nagumo brought you closer.

he whined, like a puppy, pawing at your shoulders and adjusting for you your heights as he went to straight up lick into your mouth with even less coordination than you. the result: your lower lip felt humid and you chased after him finally meeting in the middle.

his hands went from your stiff shoulders onto your back in matters of minutes while your own pulled onto his hair, fisting it enough that you didn't know why it didn't hurt.

it was clumsy as you made out like two hot teenagers at their first fondling session, and yet, as unrefined as it was you found yourself quickly moving your hands lower as nagumo's own slipped underneath your dress - of course, you had worn a fucking dress, thinking that it only fit the rich aesthetic he gave off.

you hadn't thought at all about the easy access it gave him, as he stroked gently over your panties.

«... wet...» he mumbled against your hips, pushing out his tongue as he licked against your cheek, no better than an overexcited puppy and somehow the sight felt endearing.

especially with one of his hand creating friction between your thighs

«... fuck, I missed... I missed feeling you get wet against my fingers».

«you are drunk» it was important to reinstate that, if not for him, for yourself; what were you even doing crawling into bed with the man that you had been loving since you were eighteen, drunk and ditzy? «... you are seeing... seeing things».

«no, no... I... it isn't... seeing» he giggled cutely and you hadn't thought that it'd ever come back, the slight openness of eighteen and not yet, being tainted by your respective sins «... I can... fuck... you feel exactly as you used to do. you feel like in my fucking dreams».

had he dreamed about this?

about the moment that you'd clutch your thighs against his hand not to make him leave you, although your mouth said the opposite.

in vino veritas or some shit like that and if your mouth was too sober yet, your body didn't share the same curtesy.

and maybe that's why although you knew this was wrong - you were ditzy at best, old enough to consent and definitely the tension had been brewing for years at his point - you let nagumo push you down on your back, splaying your messy hair on the floor, cold marble, enough to make you giggle.

"... you have an expensive house and the place where you first fuck me since we got back, is your floor?" you teased, catching a glimpse of something almost genuine in his displeasure with himself as if he had thought that your comment had been serious.

«come» he said, as he got off you, making you inevitably whine at the loss, although you didn't know whether it was the loss of his warmth or the fact that you felt extremely clingy due to the alcohol.

read as in you had missed him, so tantanizingly much.

normalcy wasn't even close to a concept for what could happen between you; neither of you would ever come close to quit your job anytime soon and you wondered whether a family was even in the works, as it felt presumptous to think that a simple drunk fuck might be enough to restablish a relationship between the two of you.

although you did follow him - you'd be awful to have your host stumble through his mansion - as he led you to his bedroom; similarly to the rest of the place it was expensively impersonal and yet, you didn't see much because the moment that the door was closed, you were slammed against it.

nagumo had, at least, the decency to cushion your head clumsily with an head before he resumed the series of sloppy kisses, moving downwards your body as his hands fiddled with pulling the skirt of your dress up, exposing yourself to his huge black eyes.

for once you were thankful of the alcohol, as in any other state, you wouldn't have been able to hold the sight of his eyes as he slowly slid your panties - one leg and then another, strangely patient for a drunk guy - before he left them on the floor, looking back at your heated core.

he didn't do much for enough time that you thought it was done, he'd be soon asleep in the alcohol haze.

instead, he dived forward enough that hadn't you had the door behind your back, you'd have stumbled backwards.

hands dug into your thighs to keep you in place, as a clumsy tongue tried to spread your foldes while his nose inevitably bumped into your engorged clit; oh fuck, if your knees hadn't doubeld over before, they certainly did now, as one of your fingers dug into the wood of the door as if you could leave marks.

«sl... slow, nagumo» you plead and ordered at the same time, unsure of whether you should make this quit for both of your sakes but holding yourself back «... it's been... it's been a while».

«good» he sounded so self-satisfied, with his face shiny from your juices «... I fucking want you to come to me, for this. only me».

«pres...» your voice cracked pathetically as he adjusted his positioning and dug his tongue into you while his thumb went to flick your clit.

it was too much as you hadn't been lying when you said it had been a long time since your orgasms hadn't been hand-delivered by yours truly, but you simply took it.

«... ump... presumpt... fuck, right there».

whatever he blubbered against your sticky folds was probably a comeback to your patheticness. to the fact that even in your alcohol haze, you surrendered to him.

the bottle of wine had been a terrible idea and yet, you found yourself not regretting it one bit.

---

coming back home to nagumo always felt like being greeted by an overexcited puppy that had grown overnight and hadn't yet gotten used to his measures.

«... eggs! eggs!» you screeched, holding the groceries bags away from him as he smashed himself against you wholly, pressing your chests impossibly closer as if he wished for you to become one, which wouldn't have been surprising «... and I was gone for two hours at max!».

«bed felt cold and you left a note» he simply muttered back, nosing his way through your neck and after weeks of enduring this, you had an inkling that it might be because he was trying to sniff any male cologne, although you usually just went to the daily farmers' market nearby.

as nagumo wasn't a morning person - and neither were you - you usually took advantage of his sleeping pattern to get a few rounds done by the time he'd wake up.

usually this would entail grocery shopping, checking a few stuff for work - although both you and nagumo were supposedly off - and restock on stuff you couldn't have gotten to through the week.

a silly deal between you and nagumo was that you'd use one of the two days of the weekend to do something productive, instead of lazying around his bed as he wished; the other, you'd do that till he got bored. or hungry which was more likely.

the newfound routine felt at times constricting and far too domestic and there were times when you'd be walking around the farmers' market and wonder whether you did deserve it.

whether the blood on your hands would ever taint what you were building.

thankfully, being smashed into your boyfriend's - self-appointed - tits felt quite grounding in that department.

«... yeah, yeah, but you know that each saturday I have my routine» it was the last signature of singlehood that she mantained although not many approached you due to the ring on your left hand.

a huge rock that got you oftentimes worried that somebody might have the brilliant idea to mug you.

and you'd have to beat somebody for it which felt like unnecessary paperwork.

«now, I have to shower and then I can join you back in bed till lunch time».

«mmh» her muttered appreciatively, although his kisses were definitely anything but, as they dragged hot and heavy against your exposed collarbones, making you flustered as you lightly started slapping his back to be released.

«no, you can't join me in my shower» you shot down the unspoken question, hearing an hiss and a whine.

did you mention that you boyfriend - wait, fiancé - was an overgrown puppy?

«... entertain yourself with the new sudoku magazine i got you».

at that he was off you, making you almost chuckle at his antics as he went - almost childishly - to reach for the bags in your hands, digging his hands to grab at what you had promised and giving you the chance to look at him; nagumo was always pretty in a way that got you to genuinely want to chew down onto something but him... in the morning... with you?

devastatingly gorgeous.

messy hair, eyeabgs that were going away and geeking out like a nerd for his silly sudoku game.

hhm, although your favorite look on him had to definitely be his drunken gaze when he finally slotted himself inside of you again, a few months ago. when he had looked up at you while you tried to control yourself from tightening around him, not wishing to give him the upperhand.

it had all been useless, because the moment that your eyes met he had uttered.

"fuck, I am never leaving you, again" and that had been it.

«so, you do love me!».

you were taken aback by your horny thoughts, when again a pair of arms was carelessly thrown at your neck, although with far more intensity than before; this was meant to annoy you as he nuzzled his nose into your collarbone.

«ahhh, you do like me! you like me so much that you remember what I like! and...!».

«... and that's enough» you pushed me lightly; you knew that nagumo had better reflexes than that and he could have easily enveloped you again, but you guessed being in a relationship required bargaining: you agreed to sleep into his bed till lunch time and let you handle your stuff in peace «... you get an headstart but don't think that I won't finish my crosswords first, alright?».

«that's because you cheat» he said with a soft smile, moving to turn towards the bedroom «... look up the words while I am asleep».

«if somebody wasn't a huge big baby...» you teased genuinely, simply receiving a clear glare although even that didn't feel threatening in the slightest. and even if it did, it was in a good way.

as of lately everything felt ... threatening, but in a good way.

[prettyinpwn]

I know I'm gonna sound like a crazy old broken record... but hear me out. Lots of speculation as to the true purpose of the thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com thing beneath the cut.

So... does anyone else feel like the ARG website is... odd? Like it's leading to something more coming? And before anyone screams, "Well, ackshully, Hirsch said he doesn't want to do a Season 3-"

YES. I KNOW. He said no Season 3 a million times. I was there when he told us Season 2 was it for the first time. But what he didn't say, however, was, "No more Gravity Falls anything... EVER.". Hence why we've gotten Journal 3, Lost Legends, and now The Book of Bill. Hirsch is veeerrrrry comfortable making more GF stuff.

And as someone that studied programming in college, I can tell you, this website does not seem like it was easy or cheap to make. It's effectively a single screen point and click game in a browser. Looking at the code, it seems they did use a framework called Bridgetown, lacing in looped animated MP4 files with clickable assets on top that make up the interactive elements (e.g the computer), with a lot of content made for the website itself from image files and text for each prompt a user might type. Sure, it's not the most difficult thing to program, but it's a lot more complex than, say, the searchfortheblindeye site back in the day.

That, and as someone who has worked in the corporate world, I'm sorry, but you don't pour this much effort/money into something that is just "lol cool things after product for funsies". If this was just for The Book of Bill, the smart marketing decision would have been to make the lofi album and the website, tease fans with both of them, and let them lead to an announcement of the book itself to tempt them into buying it, not the other way around. Like... Disney ain't gonna do that just out of love for fans. It's Disney, come on. They do things for money.

It's possible that Hirsch paid for it himself just for the fans, but I doubt it. Wanna know why? Because of the website's security certificate and ownership. Let's take a gander at this:

There are two odd things here. One, the range of the expiration. Most security certs last 1-2 years, at least they did at one of my previous places of employment (and we had like 50+ of them). This one expires November 7th, 2024. Odd, but maybe they only want the website up for a few months? Anyways, as an aside, everyone keep an eye out for November 7th, 2024. Could be nothing, could be something.

The other weird thing is the domain holder. Looking it up on ICANN, it gives this address:

Look that up on Google Maps, and it takes you to a company called Dun and Bradstreet. Long story short, the company does a bazillion things, but the main thing we're talking about here is:

Oh gee, Sales and Marketing. And their Sales and Marketing tools? Basically, they use data to tell companies who their audience is, so that they can market to them. Now, why would Disney care about this for a fandom for a show that's been done for almost a decade, just for a book that was released before said website (so we know they're not gathering marketing data for the book)?

Well, if I were to guess... long story short, all this stuff is a tactic to gauge who the Gravity Falls audience is now. Release the book, make some dough and fans happy, tie in a secret marketing data collection gimmick (AKA the website) using D&B as a vendor to hook the data into your CRM, send fans to a website to collect marketing data, and shabam. Now you know who the target market is all this time after.

And why in the hell would a company care about that? You tell me. Why care about who a target market is if you're not planning on marketing something to them later?

It could be that Disney is planning something similar to Gravity Falls and wants to gauge if there'd still be a market for that kind of show. Or... it could mean that Disney is planning on something more substantial related to Gravity Falls or Hirsch pitched it, and they were like, "Well, wait, let's collect data on this, first, so we'd know if it'd be a good business decision.". Not sure.

I mean, maybe I'm crazy, but doesn't this seem fishy to anyone else? If anyone else has any hypotheses as to why Hirsch and Disney have a Gravity Falls website owned by D&B, let me know, but to me... this smells... very... marketing oriented. And Hirsch doesn't seem like the guy to pour his own money into hiring an outside company to gather marketing data, that seems more up Disney's alley.

[sumluckr]

A Little Wine, A Lot of Tea

Pairings: Hikari Kuina x Yuzuha Usagi x female reader (platonic, pre borderlands au)

Summary: A cozy girls’ night takes a chaotic turn as wine flows, secrets spill, and the confessions get unexpectedly spicy.

The wine had started to kick in halfway through the second bottle.

You could feel it in the way your limbs had gone loose and warm beneath the weighted blanket, in the lazy stretch of your smile, and in the way the music—some 2000s throwback playlist—seemed to pulse a little deeper in your chest with every beat.

It was girls’ night, and the world had been left at the door.

Kuina’s apartment always felt like a warm hug, with its thrifted furniture and soft, mismatched lighting. Candles flickered on every surface. A heater hummed from the corner. The table was an organized mess of takeout containers, half-eaten fries, and open bags of snacks—both sweet and salty. Your wine glasses were already on their second round of refills, which Kuina insisted were “generous pours” rather than “unmeasured chaos.”

You were curled up on the couch, legs thrown over Usagi’s lap. Kuina had claimed her throne on the floor, half-lounging on a bean bag with a bowl of popcorn balanced on her stomach. The whole night had blurred into laughter and crumbs and too-loud shrieking over stupid TikToks, the way girls’ nights always did when you felt safe enough to let go.

“Okay,” Usagi said suddenly, swirling her wine. Her voice was light, but there was mischief buried in it. “I have something to tell you.”

You and Kuina turned in unison.

Usagi bit her lip, eyes sparkling. “I finally slept with Arisu.”

Dead silence.

Your glass froze halfway to your lips. Kuina sat up so fast she nearly sent popcorn flying across the room.

“WHAT?!” you both shrieked in unison.

Usagi laughed, cheeks flushed. “Yeah.”

Kuina scrambled to her knees like she was testifying in court. “Are you kidding me right now? When? Where? Why didn’t you tell us immediately?!”

You stared, wide-eyed. “You’ve been sitting on this like it’s not national news?”

“I wanted to see if either of you would figure it out,” Usagi said with a smug little shrug.

Kuina looked personally offended. “I knew something was up! At brunch last week, you were smiling too much. You ordered pancakes. That’s always a post-sex move.”

“Also,” you added, pointing, “you wore that little specific lip gloss. No one puts that on unless they’re trying to hide a bitten mouth.”

Usagi only giggled, swirling her glass again. “He was actually really good.”

Kuina blinked. “Arisu?”

You echoed her. “Really?”

Usagi nodded, all mock-innocence. “Mhm. Sweet, but like… sneaky good. Like he knew what he was doing, but he didn’t want to scare me off.”

Kuina let out a high-pitched sound. “Don’t say shit like that while I’m drinking!”

You leaned forward, fascinated. “But—he’s so awkward. He gets nervous around baristas. He fumbles with his keys every time he leaves the office.”

“I know,” Usagi said, grinning wider. “But I swear, something just flipped. He was nervous at first, but once he got comfortable? He got confident. Like, low voice, hand-on-my-thigh confident.”

“Shut up,” Kuina gasped.

You groaned. “Now I’m going to have flashbacks every time he says ‘good morning’ like it’s not a secret code for ‘I rocked Usagi’s world.’”

Kuina flopped back onto the rug. “God, now I have to rethink everything. I helped that man pick out sneakers last month. I touched his shoulder. This is betrayal.”

Usagi giggled. “You guys are so dramatic.”

“No,” Kuina said, wagging a finger. “You dropped a sex bomb and walked away like it was nothing. You should be fined.”

You leaned your head on the arm of the couch, laughing. “Alright, since we’re apparently dropping confessions tonight, anyone else got one?”

Kuina was quiet for a beat. Then she sat up, a little too straight. “Okay, don’t laugh.”

“Girl,” you warned, “that’s the fastest way to make me laugh.”

Kuina exhaled. “I think I’m in love with Ann.”

You blinked.

Usagi blinked.

“…Ann,” you repeated slowly. “As in cold, deadpan, emotionally unreadable Ann?”

Kuina nodded like it hurt. “Yep.”

“The one who speaks in bullet points and looks like she walked out of a noir film?” Usagi added.

“That’s the one.”

You and Usagi exchanged a look. You tried to stay neutral. Failed.

“Since when?!” you gasped.

Kuina collapsed dramatically into the bean bag, face hidden. “I don’t even know! I thought I just had a thing for her confidence, but now I get all weird and fluttery when she says my name. She held my hand last week when she checked my wrist after sparring, and I swear to god I nearly ascended.”

Usagi shrieked. “You have a crush crush!”

“She touched your face,” you added, remembering. “After your fall at the skate park, she wiped blood off your cheek like she was in a movie.”

Kuina groaned into her hands. “I know. She was all quiet and focused and gentle and I nearly proposed. I’ve been spiraling ever since.”

“But does she even like girls?” Usagi asked.

“She doesn’t like anyone,” Kuina said miserably. “She’s like a hot, terrifying robot.”

You tilted your head. “I don’t know. She flirts, I think. It’s just… Ann-style flirting. Like, very subtle. Like when she brought you that ice pack and didn’t say a word but lingered.”

“She does linger,” Kuina whispered.

“She might be into it,” Usagi said. “You just need to nudge her out of her fortress of solitude.”

“I don’t know how to nudge,” Kuina moaned. “I only know how to crash and burn.”

You reached out to pat her shoulder solemnly. “You’re doing amazing, sweetie.”

She gave you the finger without lifting her head.

Usagi refilled all three glasses and sat back with a sigh. “Alright. Your turn.”

You blinked. “Mine?”

“You’ve been way too quiet tonight,” Kuina said, lifting her head. “Spill.”

You tried to play it cool, lifting your wine glass to your lips. “There’s not much to say.”

“Bullshit,” Usagi said instantly.

Kuina narrowed her eyes. “You’ve been glowing. Don’t act like we didn’t notice.”

“Fine,” you said, laughing. “But you have to promise not to die.”

Usagi leaned in. “No promises.”

You exhaled through your nose, cheeks warming a little. “Tatta.”

Kuina frowned. “Tatta as in… the guy from IT?”

You nodded.

Usagi blinked. “The one who gets flustered when you say good morning?”

You bit your lip. “Yeah. Him.”

Another silence. Kuina looked like she was buffering.

“…and?” she finally asked. “You seeing him?”

You smirked. “Seeing, regularly having my soul knocked out of my body by him. You know. Casual.”

They both exploded.

“TATTA?!” Kuina yelled. “Are we talking about the same person? Quiet, sweet, probably-used-to-eat-glue Tatta?!”

You were giggling now, thoroughly enjoying their reactions. “He’s…not what he seems.”

“Oh my god,” Usagi whispered. “You corrupted him.”

You leaned forward, resting your chin on your hand, voice syrupy-sweet. “I didn’t corrupt anyone. I just… encouraged what was already there.”

Kuina tossed a pillow at you. “What’s already there?! Girl, he blushes if someone touches his arm!”

You raised your eyebrows. “And then he gets me alone, drops to his knees, and makes me forget my own name.”

Usagi made a noise.

Kuina looked like she’d been hit by lightning. “There is no way. No way. You’re lying.”

“I swear on my life,” you said. “The oral game is actually insane.”

Kuina rolled onto her back. “I’m going to need medical assistance.”

“And—” you added, giggling now, “he’s completely obsessed with my boobs.”

Usagi nearly dropped her glass. “I’m sorry?”

“Like, can’t leave them alone. Constantly grabbing, kissing, latching.”

“Latching?!” Kuina shrieked. “Are you breastfeeding this man?!”

You burst into laughter so hard you had to put your glass down.

“Do I need to burp him after?” Usagi wheezed, clutching her stomach.

“I hate both of you,” you choked.

Kuina wiped her eyes. “Tatta is out here tit-drunk and thriving while I’m emotionally starved over Ann. I hate it here.”

You grinned. “Told you not to die.”

Kuina flopped dramatically onto her side, one hand over her forehead like a heartbroken Victorian widow. “Just let me pass peacefully.”

Usagi, halfway through wiping her wine-streaked cheeks from laughing, snorted. “We’re not even halfway through this bottle. You can die after we finish the rosé.”

You reached over and picked up the nearly empty bottle, squinting at the label. “We’re going to need a second one if we want her to live long enough for the final toast.”

“There’s another in the fridge,” Kuina said weakly. “Next to the emergency cheesecake.”

“God, I love you,” Usagi whispered, already rising from the couch to retrieve both.

While she rummaged in the kitchen, Kuina sat up slowly, brushing popcorn out of her hair and dragging the blanket with her. Her eyes were still glassy from laughing, but there was something quieter there now too. That wine-soft, post-chaos glow that always came around this time of night, when the music faded into the background and the room felt like it belonged only to the three of you.

“She’s not actually starving, you know,” you said softly, nudging her with your foot.

Kuina raised an eyebrow. “Ann?”

You nodded.

Kuina pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders. “She just… feels like someone who doesn’t need anyone. And I feel like too much ninety percent of the time.”

You didn’t say anything right away. Just watched her for a moment.

Then, “Maybe that’s why she lingers.”

Kuina blinked.

You shrugged. “You’re the only one in this entire city who makes her pause. That has to mean something.”

Usagi returned just then, holding the fresh bottle and the emergency cheesecake like offerings to the gossip gods. “Okay. Did I miss a gay crisis?”

“Just a gay ache,” Kuina muttered.

“I’ll allow it.” Usagi set everything down and began pouring.

The three of you settled into your usual triangle—Kuina on the floor again, leaned back against your legs; you on the couch with a blanket tucked around your hips; and Usagi curled into the corner, glass in hand, eyes bright from the buzz and the hour.

The conversation picked up slower now. Fewer shrieks, more knowing smirks. More hums and pauses. More of that good, gentle honesty that only came out at 1 a.m. on nights like this.

“Okay,” Kuina said, lifting her fresh glass. “Let’s make it official. Worst crush decisions we’ve ever made. Go.”

Usagi groaned. “That guy in second year who wore socks with his sandals and told me I reminded him of his mom.”

You made a face. “That’s criminal.”

“He asked me to baby-talk him during sex,” she said flatly.

“Oh my god,” you choked.

“I left mid-stroke.”

Kuina actually clutched her chest laughing. “You did not.”

“I did,” Usagi said proudly. “I got up, grabbed my bra, and said, ‘This has been deeply upsetting.’”

You were wheezing. “You’re my hero.”

“Okay, your turn,” Usagi said, pointing at you.

You winced. “Remember that guy I dated for like five minutes last winter?”

“The one who made you take your heels off because he had a complex about his height?” Kuina asked.

“And told me I was ‘too opinionated’ for a girlfriend.”

Usagi hissed. “That one. The patriarchy in jeans.”

You raised your glass. “To learning.”

“To standards,” Kuina agreed, clinking hers against yours.

They both turned to her expectantly.

“Worst crush,” you prompted.

Kuina groaned. “Remember that tattoo artist I hooked up with who said her greatest artistic inspiration was ‘the female scream?’”

Usagi nearly spat her wine.

“She moaned her own name during sex,” Kuina finished, face buried in her hands.

You and Usagi collapsed in unison, screaming.

Kuina was laughing too now, red-faced and grinning. “This is why I’m letting the cold, unreadable scientist ruin my life. Ann would never moan her own name.”

“She probably doesn’t even moan,” Usagi said.

“She probably calculates her way to orgasm,” you added, and the laughter kicked up all over again.

Eventually, after the chaos died down, the three of you collapsed into something quieter. That lull that came after the wine had warmed your blood and the jokes had peeled back your defenses. Your legs were tucked under you, shoulders relaxed, cheeks aching from smiling. The music played on, low and slow and barely there.

“She likes you, you know,” you said softly, glancing down at Kuina.

She blinked up at you. “Ann?”

You nodded. “She wouldn’t let anyone that close otherwise.”

Kuina swallowed. “It doesn’t feel like enough.”

Usagi leaned forward. “It’s not about how loud it is, K. It’s about what it is. And I’ve seen her around you. You shake her. She doesn’t look at anyone else the way she looks at you.”

Kuina stared at her lap for a second, then gave a tiny nod. Like maybe she believed you. Just a little.

“I think I’m gonna die alone anyway,” she said dramatically a second later.

“Shut up,” you and Usagi said in unison.

Then Usagi turned her eyes on you. “Okay. Serious moment. You really like him, don’t you?”

“Tatta?” you asked, blinking.

She nodded.

You glanced at your wine, then at the little string of fairy lights flickering on the far wall.

“Yeah,” you said. “I do.”

It felt like more than just an admission. It felt like something real, something that had been resting quietly on your chest for weeks, waiting to be said aloud.

“He’s just… gentle. Thoughtful. He pays attention to everything. I’ll mention some random thing once, and a week later he’s made dinner and remembered I like my pasta without parsley. He always double-checks if I’ve eaten. He listens when I rant about work without trying to fix it. And—”

You stopped, a little breathless.

Kuina’s voice was quiet. “And?”

“And he makes me feel… safe,” you said, barely above a whisper. “Like I don’t have to keep all my sharp edges up. Like I can soften.”

They didn’t interrupt. Just let you sit in it.

You looked down at your hands. “I think I’ve been waiting a long time to feel like that.”

The room went still for a moment.

Then Usagi nudged your leg with hers. “You should tell him.”

“I don’t know if he’s ready for that,” you said softly.

“Maybe,” Kuina said, eyes tired but clear. “But I think he already knows.”

You let that sit for a moment, the weight of it. The truth of it. Then you smiled.

“Next week,” you said. “Maybe next week.”

Usagi raised her glass. “To softness.”

You lifted yours in kind. “To chaotic group chats and overly generous pours.”

Kuina reached for her own. “To Ann ruining my life. Hopefully soon.”

You all clinked.