#lowkey its thinking about stuff like this that makes it clear why i get so into different rpf as in the fandom side

[mydearesthrry]

casual - h.s.

a/n: self indulgent because i will never get over the fact that half of this happened to me literally verbatim because im a loser ok bye. this is my way of coping enjoy please i got so carried away ugh the impact of a british man hahaha. i suggest casual by chappell roan or …what are we? by lizzy mcalpine

wc: im guessing 1k>

warnings: angst thats really it harry’s lowkey a cunt but its not him ok. THIS IS FRAT BOY HARRY FOR THIS ONE!!!

y/n was startled to see her front door swing open, harry stepping into the threshold to get away from the cold air outside. “hi baby.”

“hey, h,” she replied, stepping up from her place on the couch to meet him where he was toeing off his shoes. “how was your day?”

y/n’s hands ran up his chest to his shoulders, pushing his coat off his figure and hooking it on the coatrack. “it was okay, how was yours?”

“fine, thank you,” she smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “tired, i guess.”

“that’s not good, princess, you need to get your sleep. can’t have my pretty girl all sleepy, hm?” he grinned, wrapping his arms around the girl and pressing a kiss into her temple.

“yeah, just had a lot on my mind recently, i guess.” she says through a sigh, unwrapping harry’s arms from her body, walking away from him toward the kitchen.

“like what?” harry questioned, following behind her like a puppy.

“i… nothing, it’s not important,” she considered it. she really did. but it just… she couldn’t find it in herself to ruin what they had so easily. to ruin them so easily. “don’t worry about me, really.”

harry physically recoiled as if he’d been burnt, “i want to worry about you, y/n. i want you to be okay, always.” he’d used her real name— a true indication that she’d offended him.

“i- i know, i’m sorry. i jus’ don’t wanna bother you with my stupid stuff.” she glanced up at him through her lashes, refusing to make eye contact.

“it it has to do with you, it’s not stupid. now, tell me, princess, what’s wrong?” he tried once more. he could tell that she was getting closer to telling him the truth, he just needed to coax it out of her.

“can we sit?” she asked, harry immediately nodding and grabbing her hand to lead her over.

“so, what’s on your mind?”

“i’m scared to tell you.”

harry looked confused then. “why?”

“because… if you don’t know, and i don’t know, then it doesn’t make sense for this to keep happening,” she paused. “and i don’t want to lose you.”

“wait, what are we even talking about? lose me? why would you lose m-“

“you confuse me.” that’s definitely one way to put it.

“what?” harry tilted his head, his hand still covering hers.

“i- it’s just, sometimes i really can’t tell if you want me, or if you’re just keeping me around just to keep me around. like, sometimes you treat me so platonically it confuses me, and then other times you’re rattling off how i’m the only one for you. i know we said no strings, i know, but i know you don’t really see me as a friend. there’s no way that this is just casual, harry.”

harry didn’t know what to say. staring down at their intertwined hands, he cleared his throat and bit at his lip.

“what is it, please just tell me what’s on your mind,” y/n pleaded, squeezing his hands.

“i… honestly don’t know, my love, im sorry,” he finally said, but he chose to twist the knife. “i don’t know what we are.”

oh.

oh.

“oh, um,” she whispered, sliding her legs off of harry’s knees, withdrawing her hands from his grasp to slide under her thighs. “yeah, i… i didn’t think you would.”

“i’m sorry, princess. you won’t lose me though, y’do know that, right?” he could sense her sadness like it was his own. his phone ringing distracted her from her thoughts, the name reading ‘Claire’, making a scoff leave her lips.

“go handle business, i’ll be upstairs.” y/n said coolly, standing from the couch once more. as she began her trek to the stairs, harry grabbed her wrist.

“don’t be like that.” he grumbled, pressing the pressure point between her thumb and pointer finger.

“be like what? i’m gonna go take a nap, didn’t you just tell me to get some rest?” she smiled, but he could see the hurt in her eyes.

not exclusive, more than friends, less than lovers. how could she be so naive?

“are you sure?”

“your phone’s still ringing.”

“that’s unimportant. are you okay?”

“peachy.”

he knew she was lying. he just didn’t know what she wanted to hear.

“okay, pretty girl, dream of me, yeah?”

“mhm. see you later, lock the door if you leave.”

“i will, i’m sorry.”

as she walked away, she could hear his voice fill the living room.

“hey angel, i’ll be there in 20.”

more than friends, less than lovers.

—

part 2

[double--blind]

(SPOILERS) Ashley, self-esteem, and starvation

So, I adore Ashley. She's this intensely toxic, vicious, cruel, manipulative girl, and her psychology gives me hella brainworms. Andrew's not the only one whose head I wanna crack open and root around lol. She's thrown away the world just to keep her brother by her side, and she'll continue to do worse and worse for the same reason. She's pretty awful! I've been thinking about why, though. How did things get so bad? How did her soul get so dark?

We don't know everything (I'm waiting for those new eps patiently aND CLAWING AT THE WALLS AND FROTHING AT THE MOUTH but whatevs y'know whatevs I'm normal. I'm fine), yet what information we have been given is bumping around my brain like a DVD screensaver on hyperdrive

It's clear from the start that the roots of Ashley's issues lie in her horrible, neglectful upbringing, but it's hinted that even those outside of her family felt the same abt her. I'm lowkey even betting we'll learn later on that she was ostracized by her peers somehow. However, what's most disconcerting, I believe, is how little she was when the results of this alienation are first made apparent to us (bc kids aren't dumb; they notice this stuff oftentimes instinctively, impossibly young, before they even know what it means to be hated), and how devastating the consequences were.

(There's something decidedly childish abt her dream sequence in the "questionable" route—filled with crayon scribbles and rabbit plushies, the metaphors simplistic yet profound—which really hammers in how these sentiments are things that have made a home in her since childhood. Formative subconscious truths.)

Growing up unloved and noticeably unwanted by virtually everyone around her likely left her with a gaping hole in her heart that she'd spend the rest of her life trying to fill. She'd make friends, but she'd always worry that they'd leave her, that they'd betray her, nothing tangible or weighted enough in their connection to trust in its persistence. Why should she expect otherwise? Not even being bound by familial ties ensures affection if her parents are any indication.

Every lesson she'd ever learned had always taught her this: you are easy to abandon. You cannot love and be loved by virtue of your own worth.

You have to rip their affection from their clenched hands if you want it so bad.

This understanding carries with it an undercurrent of degradation, instilling within Ashley a constant, biting inferiority complex which will never fail to be a source of insecurity. She will always be put last. She was difficult to raise, so her parents gave up on raising her. She was difficult to get along with, so her friends gave up on getting along with her.

It's an odd cycle. She's difficult bc she needs to be to get attention, but bc she's difficult, she can't keep it. Not without having whatever fondness she's managed to cultivate within someone fray at the seams, volatile and prone to collapse, bleeding toxicity.

Hence, her relationship w/Andrew.

By being the only reliable constant in her life, caring for her and keeping her company, Andrew essentially became her only source of happiness, and she's since learned not to bother with anyone else. Still, it's dangerous to keep all your eggs in one basket; since he is all she has, she must protect her place in his life with even greater ferocity, which becomes a torturous ordeal when coupled with her damaged self-esteem.

It's apparent in her quarrels with Andrew that she needs constant reassurance that she is wanted in some capacity or perceived in some positive light (getting pouty when Andrew says he's "stuck with her", needing to hear that she's pretty, needing him to "choose her", wanting him to say he loves her back, etc. etc.), yet her insecurity remains, bc unlike her, he's got options. She doesn't think he needs her like she needs him. He's got a gf, their parents love him, her friends love him. Why would he settle for her? What if someone better comes along? Someone she can't scare away?

Wouldn't he just leave her like everyone else?

Even before getting locked in the coffin of their apartment, starvation's been a constant theme in Ashley's life. She's constantly aching for love, and Andrew's the only one who can feed her. When you're forced to fight for a bite to eat or suffer every moment you hunger, you become ravenous—covetous—when faced with food; you don't want the hunger to return, so you lock down the source of your sustenance, wary of its retreat. Ashley's in a permanent state of intense insecurity, always anxious that the love that gives her life will leave her.

Andrew knows Ashley better than anyone else in the world, and it's obvs to everyone and him how desperate Ashley is for him, but I don’t think Andrew has truly, consciously processed the depth of that desperation. It's there buried in his head somewhere no doubt, but rn, he doesn't operate w/the direct awareness that he is everything. He is brother, mother, friend, and soulmate. He is life and love, air and water, everything that is good in the world—everything that there is to justify existence.

It's heartbreaking, in a way, that it's so difficult for Andrew to convince her of his loyalty. This goes further than his tendency to hide his true feelings, bc when push comes to shove, he's at her beck and call. Objectively, he's hers. She doesn't see that bc all she sees is all the ways she can lose him.

So, she gets bratty. She gets pushy, possessive, territorial. Manipulative. Gets under his skin, guilts him to exhaustion, bc she can't see him staying any other way, bc he doesn't get it, bc it works. He bends to her will, for her sake. For now. It's always "for now", bc he'll start slipping away again, and then it'll get worse. She does worse.

Becomes worse.

[agarthanguide]

Very much love your take on the new looks for Orym and Ashton! I saw a bit of your post about how Liam and Tal give feedback... would you be willing to share any information about how the back-and-forth process works between you and the actors as you work on their stuff? (I just love hearing HOW the awesome happens, not just the end results.)

Yeah okay. Lemme think, here. Alright let's so this as a numbered list-

1- Actor sends description of character. This is pretty broadly interpreted, in my experience. It's something between a brief paragraph, an annotated pdf, and multiple pinterest boards.

2- I send back a Pitch. This has taken multiple forms in the past, but it's generally settled into a few pages, that kinda go- a- Poses and Vibe Sketches- This includes little portraits, attitude poses, a couple sketches showing extreme dynamism or movement. I try to suggest outfits and weapons or accessories, here, but I don't spend a lot of time fleshing it out. b- Outfit Poses- usually on a turnaround or one fairly lowkey pose. I try to include 3 or 4 serious attempts at outfits and maybe a couple of backs, if it's important. c- Color- I usually just pick an outfit at random and try to give it a few different palettes. If the actor is absolutely sure what the palette is, or if it's a character I've worked with before, I might just make one palette and briefly color each of the outfit sketches from b in that palette d- Accessories, Weapons, Other Important Stuff- if the character is carrying around like a book or a bird or a really specific weapon, I try to address that in its own space, though sketches for all of those things may exist on other pages. This has been known to be very pretty or a bit boring.

3- There is some form of back and forth between me and the actors (and a producer, who are all lovely and don't step in on creative things but are always working against a schedule and need to know how things are going. I just want to be clear that every producer at CR is a secret angel who eats deadlines and shits magic and every one of them totally Gets It. They are all One Of Us). The back and forth is always individual and based on the actor but it can be- a- Actor picks from menu, usually via complex "circling" system (also all sketches are numbered, so they can just ref numbers). b- Actor sort of picks from menu, while moderating and adding further references. c- Actor just sends a bunch more shit and I narrow stuff down based upon what they seem to be getting at.

4- There's this bit of finding what the pose is gonna be, marking in all the necessary accessories, getting that last email about adding a scar, can we add a necklace? etc. What you are left with is something that the Producers call "pre-final." If it hasn't already been with the modelers and painters this whole time, this is when the modelers and painters get the design and start their magic.

5- I go away into a cave for a time period of quiet reflection with my Gods. I refer to this period as "rendering." I cannot be reached by the reason of man and spend a lot of time bitching to my friends while I try to figure out why shading a cape is suddenly the most difficult thing I've ever dealt with in my life.

6- Done!

[offonaherosjourney]

The immense rewatch value of Knives Out and Glass Onion

One thing I really love about Knives Out and Glass Onion (spoilers for both movies, btw) is their rewatch value. I love murder mysteries, but I don't think I've seen any more than twice or three times, and yet I've watched Glass Onion 4 times so far and Knives Out so many times I'm embarassed to even type the number. And lately I'd been thinking about what might be the reason why I keep coming back to these movies and about how I'm still enjoying them wholeheartedly despite knowing the dialogue of Knives Out almost to heart, and I think I've figured out why.

Watching a murder mystery for the first time is enjoyable because you're wrapped up in the mystery and in trying to guess the murderer. And then on your second watch you might know who the murderer is, but you still enjoy it because you get to pay attention to all the things you didn't notice or didn't know were clues the first time.

Rewatching Knives Out and Glass Onion is extremely enjoyable not only because you get to spot all the clues now, but also because of the seamless way Rian Johnson weaves humor into these films. After a couple viewings you might get tired of watching Wanetta Thrombey calling Marta "Ransom", or watching Miles place his glass on Dukes hand... but do you know what you don't get tired of? Marta's clumsy attempts to sabotage Blanc's investigation. Ransom telling his family to eat shit. Marta yeeting that piece of trellis only for the dog to bring it back. Or Blanc solving Miles' silly murder mystery in thirty seconds. The hot sauce scene. Blanc calling Miles a vainglorious buffoon.

And since the scripts are so brilliant and packed with little details, further rewatches of the films keep rewarding you with other little things you might not have picked up the first or second time. How, when the Thrombeys recount Harlan's birthday they all put themselves next to him, or when you realize that they don't know where Marta is from, or how they casually hand her their plates as if she's their maid. How telling are the masks each character wears and how they behave in the pier scene, the red solo cup Miles gives Peg, the painting that is hanged upside down, Helen in the end sitting with the exact same pose as the Mona Lisa.

Now, add to that all that the social critique in the films and their clear "fuck the rich" message, made manifest by a cast of unlikeable assholes that holy shit you lowkey wish all were responsible for the murder because you hate them and want to see all of them behind bars. Also, let's not forget about the world's greatest detective in this film universe, who happens to be unabashedly human. Benoit Blanc is an extremely likable character that captivates the audience's heart not because of his superior intellect and deduction skills, but because of his empathy. Because he makes sure that Marta understands she is a good nurse. Because he tells Helen to get the justice she deserves.

The result of all that stuff is that a movie whose greatest appeal might have been its whodunnit aspect on a first watch, on future ones presents a sort of good vs evil stakes. Because Marta is a good person and you like her and want her to learn she didn't murder Harlan and get the house and money she earned by being a good friend. Because Helen deserves justice and you like her and you can't wait to see her cathartic and righteous anger be the spark that lights the fire that burns down Miles Bron's empire built out of lies, theft and murder.

That's why I keep watching these movies over and over and why I'll never grow tired of watching them.

[puffskeeter]

Hey I’m such a big fan of your art and I very much enjoy watching your YouTube channel 🤍🤍

And I want to ask you why you don’t ship the ppgxrrb and I want to hear your opinion about it which I can very much respect.

Plus another question that what type of fashion you think your au of the Powerpuff, Rowdyruff, and your Original Characters fall into between I really love how you draw them?

OMG TYSM!! I think i've seen your comments on my videos and TYSM for those too!! :D

I'll make a seperate post for my fashions/aesthetics for RRBORN characters! this one is pretty long even though i wanted it to be short lolz

Why i dont actively ship PPGxRRB:

I'm scrapping my drafted essay post about this for now because its really uncalled for and unnecessary. IDK sorry to anyone who looked forwards 2 it, but i just dont think i illustrate my point very well and more than half of it is lowkey a biased vent post and pure rambling. Either way this is the TLDR for the post you'll never see LOL.

But actually, I do ship PPGxRRB, i've just drifted away from it over the years. I think one of the biggest 'problems' i have with PPG x RRB is mainly with the portrayal of it. My main issue is with how a lot of people mischaracterize the RRB/PPG and completely deconstruct them as characters so that they can be love interests for the eachother and nothing more. One of my points in my scrapped post was that; I have no idea how an entire fandom managed to gender-bend the Bechdel test, but it is rare that i find PPGxRRB media where the RRB have actual lives, interests, hobbies, and friends that have nothing to do with the PPG. Half the time they can barely have a thought if it isn't about the PPG. As i said, Gender-bent Bechdel test.

Another point was that: ppgxrrb has gained a horrible reputation for itself over the years. Back in its "Glory" days, Toxic fans of the ships had bulldozed anything that differs from their favorite empty dynamics. Those usually being The Reds, Blues, and Greens. Nowadays i still see almost nothing in the realms of variety between creators interpretations of the ships. Almost every time i see a PPGxRRB post, it can fit into a set dynamic that the ship is already infamous for.

I want to be able to see the creators love and passion for their ships. I want to know how and why these characters ended up together. If a story is to be told, i want to hear it. I know that the majority of PPGxRRB creators are, by default, amateurs (they dont get paid and its not on a professional scale), but after seeing the exact same badly written love story hundreds , maybe even thousands of times with little-to-no variety, I've gotten bored and tired of people devaluing my favorite characters to be nothing more than overplayed dynamics and shipping fuel.

A lot of people like shipping because of the dynamics, but ship dynamics don't hook me in, and ive noticed that most PPGxRRB stuff is purely ship dynamics and nothing more. Theres nothing wrong with loving ship dynamics or being drawn to ships for their specific dynamics! I just dont care about dynamics, i care about chemistry and story. But most amateurs cant effectively show the chemistry or write the story, a lot of them can barely characterize the 2 characters in their ships.

FYI this isnt about anyone specific or even many recent fans of PPGxRRB. I've been in/around the online PPG fandom since before 2016, and a lot of my thoughts/feelings on the matter have a lot to do with stuff that happened over the years i've loved this series, and more specifically, The RowdyRuff Boys.

To be clear: When i say that they are mischaracterized, i'm not talking about HC's. I'm just tired of seeing the PPG and RRB dulled down into one-note personalities with stereotypical characterization and almost always no tangible character development. A love story is still a story, and a lot of shippers seem to half ass the "story" for favor of the "love".

I dont hate or even dislike PPG x RRB. I'm just really tired of rarely seeing people do the RRB justice, and i want these characters to be treated with the full respect that i think they deserve.

WOW this post is way to long already... still a lot shorter than my OG post. Sorry for being insane about the RRB. it will happen again.

[sunthyme]

Sorry for this being a day late, I last second decided I hated how the og designs turned out so I redid them lmaooo. Whoops! Tyty sm for the support though, I love y'all! 🩷🩷🩷

💐Ignihyde💐

I cleared the tail end of Book 4 and all of Book 5 two days ago so fair warning, I'm still not completely aware of all the ins and outs of Ortho and Idia. And I might have to redo some of my Pomefiore headcanons with Book 5 in mind, namely Rook??? Whose apparently from Sunset Savanna??? Anyways, onto the designs...

🎮Idia Shroud🎮

(he/it) Unlabelled Gender - Achillic Asexual

Ah, the most relatable character in Twisted Wonderland...

- I don't think I really changed a whole lot about him physically, tbh. Gave him slightly bluer skin and dark makeup. I figured he's kinda one of the closest characters to like alt fashion and stuff so I slapped some piercings on him.

- You can't see them with his GIANT MESS OF HAIR but I gave him some piercings. I'll just grab a pic of them rq.

No bald Idia today guys.

- He's autistic. Is that even up for debate at this point? Either way, I feel like he'd actually hate having hair against his neck and typically put it into a ponytail or something. That shit would be hella warm otherwise, fire or no.

- He plays dating sims religiously but god forbid someone ACTUALLY flirts with him. In the unlikely scenario that he actually realises they're hitting on it, he just freaks out and runs, physically if possible. I think he's unintentionally shut people down hard because he cannot fathom why anyone would like it.

- He has to fight his demons whenever he see any of the people with cat ears which me too me too. Ignihyde actually has a bit of a stray cats issue, namely because Idia sets out food and water for them and refuses to let anyone take them away. They never get into the workshops or anywhere dangerous and Idia has named all of them.

- He has unique names not only for the stray cats of Ignihyde but also for all of the ones in his games, in specific his Minecraft cats.

- It's actually in the process of making a robotic cat as a sort of emotional support animal since a live cat isn't allowed in classes due to allergies (which Grim is exempt from due to him not technically being a cat and not producing allergens, fun fact).

- Oh! And I headcanon him as Greek and Japanese. Forgot that oops. Nationality-wise he'd be Australian though.

I was struggling to think of things that were just canon facts of his character already, which, to be fair, some of this could be but moving onto...

🦾Ortho Shroud🦾

(they/it/he) Nonbinary???

I actually adore how they came out omg. I have no really experience with robot/cyborg character design so I gave myself some liberties.

- First and for most, I made a lot of its robot features more obvious with panelling that would make it easy for Idia to access any brain or vocal mechanics. You cannot convince me that Idia, known for liking video games and anime, would pass up an opportunity to make Ortho look cool asf. Or maybe Book 6 can but for now, panels.

- I don't know if it's ever brought up in detail Ortho's like material components and stuff but I think they're made with the anti-magic stuff Charon's ferrymen have, further enhanced and durable. His freckles help with sensing particularly smell and temperature.

- His eyes took a bit of inspiration from Genoa, I just though a black sclera would look super cool tbh.

- It's hair is a bit crazier and I wanted to lowkey emulate Medusa vibes with it and the soulless eyes lol.

Not much else right now but I know damn well Book 6 will make me cry... Time for the ocs!

🪻Fuji Izanami🪻

Third Year - (she/he) Bigender - Bisexual

- So, a bit of a disclaimer, I've never actually seen Hercules because I was a Greek mythology nerd and was offended by the inaccuracies lol so keep that in mind with the ocs for this dorm. Fuji is my Cerberus character!

- He's the vice-housewarden of Ignihyde and tends to help out with Ortho's upgrades by moving the heavier parts that Idia can't lift.

- Since I believe, and correct me if I'm wrong, Cerberus means 'spots', I wanted her to have a ton of freckles as an omage.

- She's fully Japanese and has been a childhood friend of the Shrouds, with both families going way back. He was kind of Idia's emotional support before Ortho was allowed as well as a bit of a bodyguard. She and Ortho were the reason Idia didn't have to attend with a mass guard force.

- Quiet and seems quite menacing at first but is a huge softie and loves to be around other people. She and Jack are workout buddies and bond over common music tastes in the J-Pop and K-Pop genres.

- When she's talking to Idia or Ortho, it tends to be in Japanese (neglecting that the game is set to Japanese, imagine the default is like a common tongue or something lol).

- He specialises in heavier mech tech, developing protective wear and other durable things to work with. She hopes to intern with Charon eventually and work to study the containment of blot.

Now for another set of triplets, these ones all in Ignihyde...

🕰️Ye-Jin Ryu🕰️

Second Year - (she/her) - Sapphic

So these next three characters are representative of the Fates, they're Korean.

- Ye-Jin is my 'past' character. I styled her hair is an older-fashioned wavy cut and gave her some classy pearl earrings to give that 🌸vintage aesthetic🌸.

- Her primary skill set and interest is in re-purposing older things and upgrading them i.e. keeping the older aesthetic but making the mechanisms modern and remove the fear that it'll break down from overuse and whatnot.

- As such, she's a sucker for antiques and older fashion trends, mostly consisting of long skirts and formal wear. That being said, she still wears properly protective gear w an working on one of her projects.

- A hobby of hers is photography and she loves both actually taking photos as well as experimenting with different kinds of old cameras. She's a part of a photography club and also has a photo wall in her room.

- Never one to slack, she enjoys journalling and writing letters in her pass time as well. A hopeless romantic, she and Chanda share a class and Ye-Jin writes little posty notes for her.

Now for the present..

🛰️Ji-Ho Ryu🛰️

Second Year - (she/they) - Heteroromantic Bisexual

- Ji-Ho is the present and reflects a more modern Korean makeup style and haircut. I think she'd have reading glasses but only wear them when necessary.

- She has an interest in modern technology and pushing its limits. Adding more storage to a computer than typically offered, making a car even more gas efficient, that kind of stuff.

- They like a combination of things but are actually a part of the Spelldrive Club. She wanted to try something new and expand their bases. It gave her some insight for a recent interest in prosthetics she's developed.

For the final Fate,

👾Dae Ryu👾

Second Year - (she/they/it) Agender - Pansexual

- Dae is the future! I gave her more sci-fi-y makeup and a bit more flare in its hairstyle. Some piercings and ta dah!

- They specialise in bio-tech. Looking at nature to modify scientific approaches and being more environmentally friendly. Sustainability is a top priority for Dae.

- She wants to eventually make basic resources easily accessible to all and is doing its best to work out a solution. They're connecting the dots lol.

- Dae is a part of the hiking club and loves being around nature as much if not more than being in her lab. They often go hiking with Chunying on weekends.

For the last Ignihyde student and the final Benoit...

💀Cooper Benoit💀

First Year - (they/he) Nonbinary - Queer

- Cooper is twisted from Barrel and is the last of the Benoit family to be introduced. They are a very booksmart person and a math nerd.

- He's also disabled and typically uses a wheelchair. As such, they have been working on trying to improve the school's general accessibility as even with magic, NRC's campus can be difficult to navigate in a wheelchair.

- Similarly to Idia, Cooper is a total cat person and he and Idia take care of the strays together. Cooper's slowly memorising the names lmao.

That's all for Ignihyde! Diasomnia will be out tomorrow, promise! Tyty 🩷🩷🩷

[do-i-look-like-a-doctor]

part 2 of this

anyways, that’s that. things are fine, people are talked down of their motives, life is going back to normal. THEN OBITO SHOWS UP and it’s nothing but emotional turmoil between Kakashi and that orange masked moron. don’t even get me started on why Obito is doing all this evil stuff in the first place.

wtf do you mean Orbit, that thirty year old, buff, scarred, dopey, traumatized, texas two-steppin man is trying to ruin the world because his crush got gut punched to death when they were both FOURTEEN?

like babe, there’s more important things to worry about besides Rin and killing Kakashi. how are you gonna get crushed by a rock as a teen and instead of staying dead like a normal person you get revived, patched up with tar by your shady uncle, and go on a vengeful rampage for like 15 years. don’t piss me off.

so now it’s Orbit vs. Cashew which is more of a mass emotional hysteria between those two frenemies if anything. then, it’s Fishroll, Pink Doctor, Sigh, Yams, and the entire village vs. The Bad Girls Club.

when Naruto fights these troglodytes you’d think it would be a typical battle of one wins one loses but OF COURSE ITS NOT ITS NEVER NORMAL CIRCUMSTANCE.

Naruto, the same kid who can control some of the most powerful ninjutsu, the dude who is besties with the fox demon in his mind, the orphan who had every right to become the villain, wins his fights not with bloodshed but by TALKING? no, don’t look at me. for practical reasons, i do not exist as this moment.

Naruto and company are all out there kicking ass and winning because why wouldn’t they. wanna know who’s not winning? Weasel because Sasuke found him and merked his blind self. yeah, Itachi let Sasuke kill him. wtf, who wrote that in? someone explain family therapy to these two before i call the police.

so when the Bad Girls Club are no longer a club aka hella hella dead or gone and that weird emotional thunderclap between Kakashi and Obito is done you’d think that’s a wrap. you’d think that’s it because everyone got what they wanted. well you’re wrong, sorry love.

because Naruto is STILL SNIFFING OUT SASUKE LIKE A BLOODHOUND WHOS ON THE PROWL.

i wanna point out that throughout the entire series Sasuke has made it clear he doesn’t want friends and Naruto basically said “well we’re married so to bad” and cuz of this whenever he did run into Sasuke it was always a fight. the constant back and forth between these two of betting on losing dogs, yin and yang, self-destruction, self-realization, and strength gain leads you to think Naruto will kill Sasuke because he couldn’t save Sasuke from himself.

that doesn’t happen, of course it doesn’t. that’s normal circumstance and we don’t do that here. have you been listening? don’t get me started fam I’ll punch walls.

Sasuke, the same dude who’s been against any form of emotional connection since day zero, suddenly faces the guy who’s been standing up for him despite all the destruction and death. what’s Sasuke do? admits he’s always lowkey cared for Naruto and the others. im leaving the function, i slipped on my own tears on the way out.

my Jonas brother in Christ, what? Sasuke, babe, get out of my house and be so serious.

i may not have a lot of muscle but i have unbridled female rage, a lot of questions, and a broken flat iron to help me find the god damn answers.

so yeah, he says “teehee oops”, helps rid of the remaining baddies, him and Naruto get matching missing limbs, and all is mostly forgiven.

what do you have left at the end of all this bullshit? traumatized kids who grow up, become something, get married, some have kids, and we never actually got the boyfriends we deserve. Sasuke is still trying to be Jesus of Suburbia, Naruto has a son who’s name sounds like Burrito.

i can not make this shit up, this series goes every direction yet also stays in a circle. if I showed any of the episodes to a victorian child or a modern day old person their heads would explode and it’d feel like chernobyl all over again.

what lessons did we learn by the end of the anime. one, don’t try to destroy the world when your crush dies in your teens. two, mind your business. three, seek family therapy before attempting murder. four, being gay is great and helping the homies is greater. and five, don’t get me started.

yall ever love an anime and/or show so much it becomes irritating? cuz i do.

anyways, it’s a great anime. good animation, relatable characters, amazing development of the world and people in it. i recommend it to everyone and yes it’s weird but we will ignore that. if you want weirder, watch One Piece.

thank you for coming to my yap session.

(again, unedited. sorry for mistakes, i might fix them later)

[narwhalandchill]

anyway tho like. overall (SPOILER FREE!!) natlan first impressions over last week in no particular order for me bc i felt like it sooooo

Firstly: the environments are absolutely insane like. i love the vibrancy they brought into it and the striking distinct sceneries between the three main regions (tho lowkey any water region post-fontaine is... unfortunate for basically feeling like its lacking a layer w/o diving) that rly make them feel unique!! like i havent explored an insane amount but a decent bit nonetheless and i think as much as i Liked fontaine the aboveground environments there just werent that unique which like. kinda couldnt be helped given the geographic inspirations like it was good and v beautiful in its own way but more like. mondstadt premium french steampunk edition if that makes sense. whereas natlan is already striking such a distinct image for itself and thats just great

also loving all the kinds of living creatures going about everywhere like not even accounting for the saurians genshins rly come so far from the early days of barely any non-monster creature anywhere (mondstadt cavalry but no horses moment) and i love all the creatures sm 💕💕 Especially all the surprise chests theyve incorporated into tiny interactions with the animals like it just feels v fresh and immersive. theyve rly nailed the feeling of making the natural environment feel lived in its so nice

the music is also just. knocking it out of the park like ive had to pause on multiple occasions just to listen bc holy shit its good 😭😭😭 and this is also sth i think compares to fontaine bc. i mean as much as of a cringe moment the whole "wow YPC left and now fontaine music is mid its over" tantrum was (ESPECIALLY once remuria dropped like 💀💀💀 that was just gloating . A whole music based region and culture????? ya we get it) buuut. now w natlan. i do have to admit that fontaine does suffer from some of its environmental soundtracks not being as distinctly memorable as previous nations and now natlan as well . obviously fontaine has its shiver-worthy standouts but its interesting that most of those for me are bc of their use in the AQ and that association . whereas natlans been jumpscaring me left and right on the first listen lmao . anyway to be clear the point is not me hating on fontaine music for lacking impact (but never polish or quality) in some tracks just that hoyomix in natlan is delivering some insanely good stuff rn jsjskskskakdkdk

next. SAURIANS. hoyo. Hoyo . WHY DO WE HAVE TO KILL THEM????????!??? HELLO????@?

ITS SO AWFUL I FEEL LIKE A MONSTER 😭😭😭😭😭 like the small ones?????? The whelps WHIMPERING?????? id rather you punched me in the face this is horrible 😭😭 like you rly saw all the complaints about killing the cute sea creatures in fontaine being too cruel and we dont want that and went bet 💀💀💀 why do i have to wear the skin of a baby saurians mom to murder the kids its so. This is terrible why would you do thisss. id rather merk 7848 seals in Fontaine than hurt a single saurian its so badd

But uhhhhh yeah saurians are great, i rly rly love their goofy animations and how much personality each kind exudes theyre just . Lovable shaped and all i just wish they didnt. Make them THE abundant overworld enemy we need for mats 💀💀💀

In all seriousness tho gameplay wise i really like how the saurians kinda bridge the gap between the older 1.x-2.x exploration where it was really mostly just you with your characters not that many exploration mechanics to boost mobility and traversal at all and then the 3.x era and afterwards where there are all forms of assistance from things like the dendro anchors and chenyu vale mechanics and everything bc. as much as the mobility boosts are nice they kinda had the risk of taking you Out of the exploration so it just turns into a zoom around with gadgets mini game ya know???? But i think w the saurians its a lot more balanced bc. youre still playing As a specific character with their own movement and controls not just getting warped from 1 location to another as a hydro bubble and thats rly rly nice. tho i have to say the koholasaur controls are kinda ass compared to the other 2 lmao . like ig its just post fontaine problems where we Already Got flawless underwater movement so its just. not the saurian alone but the water environments themselves just being ehhh without that added... depth (haha) there??

anyway unfortunately tho on a more negative note wrt the characters im still very uhhhh. mixed on the very modern design direction taken for the playable units and the overall lack of cohesion between a lot of them like. yes natlan is its own thing with different tribes and it should stand out but something about it just takes it a bit too far for suspension of disbelief . the three 5.0 characters i think look overall good and work well enough, but then theres designs like chasca and mavuika where its just . Ehhhh.

like chasca in particular (and im sorry in advance for never letting you unsee this either) i havent been able to stop thinking about a comment i saw about how like. her makeup is WAY too detailed and intense for genshins facial models and makes her face look really weird and just kind of like a bratz doll? compared to the rest of the cast like its really this borderline "yassified" parody of a heavy makeup look that just. Doesnt look natural nor fit in with the rest of genshins characters roster and she just looks off its . Weird. like obviously ik theres a lot of v intense hate going on for her design to the point where its actively hurtful to those who like her and idt thats good at all but this is kinda why her model has such issues for me. and the mess of an outfit doesnt help with the uncanny face stuff either lmao

mavuika is more of an outfit problem honestly like. her hair is good the eyes are amazing the color scheme is great & love the sun motifs and her hair accessory but i just. a biker????? Huh? and not even a particularly good looking biker design its literally just a plain bodysuit design without the usual detailing and dangly things to make it look better from the back that theyve usually done w bodysuit type charas (think shenhe) its just this. uncomfortable looking sausage casing of a disaster garment and that zipper is just.... not it 💀💀💀 like. it doesnt look completely awful if i dont actively think about it so its like whatever but i wish she was given sth a bit different. also ffs i hope she doesnt get ACTUAL motorbike animations like the memes are funny yeah but. thats too much for me sorry thats hsr and zzz stuff . like its just. The overt modernity in natlan isnt doing it for me very much 😔😔

But oh well i hope ill warm up to the cast over time. beyond mby chasca its not like i hate-hate the look of anyone to the point where its off putting its just a Bit of a mixed feeling for now. kinich and citlali are easily my favorites from the revealed designs tho and i do actually like xilonen as well (& kachina is baby) . n like to be fair maybe its just not my style this time around - fontaine was Really catering to me personally with the designs there bc i love ruffles and lolita style inspirations and more historical fashion references and uniform-like elements for garments so a lot of designs were just hook line and sinker for me personally lmao . but ig that does make it very fucking predictable that my favorite design in natlans cast so far is Easily capitano even tho he kinda doesnt count bc i just fucking love goth historical military uniform aesthetics so much its embarrassing 😭😭😭 dont ask me how many times ive rewatched The cutscene just to watch the way his garments shift around as he moves at the beginning its...........

iiii dont think im gonna comment on the WQs yet? since its bit of a spoilery territory and im far from done w all of them but ive really liked the ones ive done so far!!! And hmm what else

OH THE REPUTATIONS. So first RIP weekly bounties and requests past max reputation for 150k weekly free mora that was such an unnecessary change hoyo what the fuck.

BUT. i have to say. Absolutely LOVE how the reputations are now distributed among the tribes and how much more lived in the entire nation feels compared to p much. ANY previous one by having multiple settlements and communities that all get their own quests and narratives like. yes its a natlan thing bc it has the 6 tribes but i RLY wish theyll keep some version of this system for snezhnaya too bc like. Especially with the story quest incorporation into the tribal chronicles chain its just??? Such an organic way to tie a playable character INTO their environment and community in a way thats been a major failing in a lot of older SQs before like its just. genius

anyway point being. just Imagine playable tonia happening except theres also some sort of morepesok reputation questline and system like??? Actually featuring the village and its people AND childes entire family fr fr in their own storyline in a voiced capacity?? Please itd be so good 😭😭😭😭

but yeah i love the tribal chronicles approach so much its like the perfect marriage between world quests and story quests and reputation like chef kiss truly. and also new bounty and request QoL is great.

Also no spoilers but man doing the first parts of the scions of the canopy quest.... yeah i was in fucking tears . If you know you know.

aaaand i think thats it for now ??? Overall been having a great time, not pulling for anyone in 5.0 on my main, maybe kinich on my alt but cant guarantee him there . i think ill get xilonen and then mavuika for sure bc obvious archon (unless shes an on fielder HSJSKSOEKDIEI) but the big lookout is still chioris rerun lmao. xilonen and her at the same time would be ideal thanks xx

hope its been fun for yall too o777

[llumimoon]

Pssst Cal in a dndads Voltron AU which teen do you think would control each lion? ,':) (yeah Hermie is included here lol there's 5 lions after all!)

BABA YOU DONT EVEN KNOW ... I ALREADY ASSIGNED ALL THE TEENS LIONS BEFORE. I'VE THOUGHT ABT IT TWICE NOW WITH LIKE A MONTHS LONG GAP BETWEEN..... You came to the right place is all I'm saying JWBEVAJHAHAHA

Okay lets get the most obvious one to me out of the way, which is Link in the Yellow Lion. Like. First of all the fact that Yellow is A LEG and also Yellow representing kindness .... I think he really does support the team and grounds them in many aspects. Also Yellow is bulky like a dnd paladin LMAO it just makes the MOST sense to me? Yellow also being the color I associate with Link so maybe that gives me a slight bias lmaooo

The rest are. LESS clear to me. I HAVE already settled on an arrangement I'm more or less okay with but I could make a lot of arguments for alternative placements !! I will also admit maybe the places I settled on are a little color biased?

The Lions DO kind of have traits associated with each one except its. much less clear in some cases than others and I had to be a little flexible bc in my opinion NONE of the teens r like . smart enough for the Green Lion JWBECWUAGAHAA like they're all smart in their own ways and I do bend some rules a little to make their smarts work as an argument but I feel like Green is more book smart than anything which makes it difficult.

Uhmmm everyone else from here on out has at least two lions I could argue for and then I'll say which one I settled on? But like if you disagree thats totally fair LMAO like I said many assignments can be considered

Scary I mainly thought about the Black or Red Lion... There's the whole. Scary's the leader! Thing and also the idea of power corrupting... but also she can be pretty impulsive which is why I considered Red, also her tendency to have fire based magic mishaps LMAO I think Scary shows a lot of growth and inner reflection and also she has good insight on how the others seem to be feeling even if she doesn't always act on it or use it in the right way, so I could see that as the markings for the beginning of a Black Lion learning to be the leader type arc? Also to be honest shes the Main and practically Only contender for Black so she ends up getting it by default.

Hermie I think could be the Blue or Green Lion. I don't actually remember if they say IN THE SHOW what the Blue Lion stands for, but like. I've read so much Lance fanfic LMAO that to me it stands for Flexibility and what is Hermie if not flexible. Maybe too flexible? In the sense of. She will fill any role that is needed or given to her, like water will. I also thought Green bc to me Hermie is a character who is VERY in his head. Like they overthink to the point of looping back around to stupid again but also shes always playing mind games with other people. Hermie seems to always be one step ahead or at least is good at pretending they are. Also you can say the nature stuff is Hermie in his poison ivy era. Green is also pretty small and easy to damage which lines up with how fragile he is in a fight and maybe you could make an argument for the camouflage being like shapeshifting? idk. Anyways I decided on Green I think.

Normal I think I'm biased bc he's my fav and Lance was my old fav and I already made a post before about how I think they're similar and would get along and ANYWAYS LMAO I think its clear I gave him Blue. Something something, the legs being the support of the team something something water meaning flexibility but also ice can be stubbornness something something how I associate Normal (and lowkey the Doodler) with water (a whole nother thing to get into u can ask me to elaborate later) etc. I also played around with the idea of him in Red as Scary's right hand bc . shakes them . I think it could possibly fit but not as well? Fire isn't really Normals thing. I also briefly considered him for Black bc Normal is usually the one pushing the group towards a certain goal, but also his plans kind of never end up going through so I was like hmm not sure about that one. Blue I think is the best fit for him in the end which is why everyone else ended up where they did.

TAYLOR. Ok process of elimination you probably already figured out that I chose Red for him BUT I also considered Blue and Green. Green is fun bc you can play with his roughish abilities, like hiding and sneak attacks. His knowledge is more obscure facts and survival skills but I think it's enough to be a contender! I cannot explain the Blue stuff its all vibes in my head but trust me . I think also leaning into, Blue and Yellow are the legs that support and stabilize the team thing, Taylor is actually pretty good at keeping a cool head all things considered. Red, yes maybe slightly process of elimination but COME ON ITS BIG SWORD AND ALSO FIRE POWERS!!! Taylor would love that shit. Also going zoom zoom fast. Also the Red Lion is the second in command/right hand of the Black Lion and it just fits Taylor's protagonist vibes LMAO I think he usually is off doing is own thing which is also very Red Lion.

So to summarize: Scary Black, Taylor Red, Hermie Green, Link Yellow and Normal Blue.

Again I could totally see the justification for shuffling them around a bit but this is the assignments I settled on? The colors lining up is also nice I will not lie. I also could see an alternate universe where Normal is Red, Hermie Blue and Taylor Green, I think thats my second most favorable arrangement.

LMAO SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO MAKE THIS SO LONG I'VE JUST THOUGHT A LOT ABOUT IT BEFORE. AS YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE. I take sorting my characters into categories VERY seriously 😤 enrichment for me.

[determinate-negation]

I see you as someone who's educated and perceptive so I feel disappointed that you gave me a vague answer about my question of how to fight back against increasing misogyny from an increasing modern day fascist anti-human movement who quite literally, openly are currently spreading propaganda that reduces "women as a class" to a subhuman breeding stock walking womb factory parts. We need to be able to respond with a socialist-communist feminism to this stuff instead of "I'm not sure what you mean because my analysis of feminist topics is still stuck on the what is a woman debate." I don't care about the "what is a woman" pointless linguistic debate happening on twitter. All of that is a distraction because all it's doing is enforcing "trans women and cis women are inherently opposed." They're not. Your opposition knows they're not- that's why your opposition is so devoted to fixating on all the transphobic "trans women are predators, cis women are vulnerable saints" propaganda. All that is doing is dividing people that should be supporting each other against a clear common enemy. Is speaking of the socio-historical structural topic of "women as a class" automatically or inherently implying bioessentialism? I don't believe it is and it would be stupid to roll over and believe it is, because that's what your opposition believes. Any socialist-communist feminism inherently rejects bioessentialism. Either "women as a class" exists as a topic worthy of marxist analysis or it doesn't. I believe it does- especially when books like "selective breeding and the birth of philosophy" are becoming rapid bestsellers. What does it mean to "reject bioessentialism completely" as a method of socialist-communist feminist response when faced with this kind of enemy? I apologize for heavy handed speech, wont ask anymore questions, and wish you the best.

are you good? ngl people often send weird shit trying to get non transphobic marxists to argue with them or like allegedly contradict themselves with vague messages that resemble the one you anonymously sent me so i dont think its that crazy for me to wonder if thats the intent while giving you my legit answer. this message already lowkey makes a lot of assumptions about my beliefs since i dont really even post about this topic and for better or worse socialist feminist theory is not something i read or talk much about, and the most i can speak to is psychoanalysis and feminism and gender

[apatheticlexicographer]

(this is kind of a long post that somehow turned into lowkey a conspiracy theory but i don’t want to rewrite the start bc it was written pretty much stream of consciousness and that amuses me)

maybe this is an unpopular opinion but i don’t want byler to be spoiled lol

crumbs, sure, little things that keep us invested, but i want to go into s5 completely unawares of how it’s gonna play out. i don’t want the cast or the official socials or some random leaker to tell me what’s gonna happen beforehand.

honestly the fact that so many people involved with the show have acknowledged byler yet none of them have shot it down as a possibility is a big enough crumb for me. or the way official netflix accounts have posted promotional things with byler since s4 dropped. yeah, they don’t have any involvement with the production of the show, but if the ship is being used for marketing then it’s considered a possible sales point.

actually now that i think of it, does anybody remember the june advent calendar??? when, immediately after v1 dropped, the official netflix accounts started posting pro-byler stuff damn near every day, to the point where we made an event out of it???

at the time we all got super hyped over it and then figured it was queerbait when they didn’t get together in v2, but isn’t it mighty fuckin convenient that the netflix accounts just “coincidentally” happened to start posting pro-byler stuff as soon as v1 dropped??? because yeah, byler started picking up traction immediately after it aired, but it took a while to really get the ball rolling. they started cashing in on the byler hyper train when it was only just beginning to grow from its tiny pre-s4 presence. seeing official accounts mentioning byler probably helped to cement it in a lot of people’s radar in the gap between the volumes. and didn’t noah also start saying he shipped byler around then??? 

POSTED ON JUNE THIRD??? only a week after v1 aired??? and ppl were so surprised by this tweet that when he was on a panel somebody asked him if he got hacked 😭😭

back then it really seemed like “oh the official accounts are queerbaiting during pride month” but A: we know noah wasn’t just saying this for nothing,he’s made it very clear that he believes it and B: why the hell would they be queerbaiting the tiny fledgling post-v1 byler audience when it was only just coming together??!?

hindsight says something was afoot here actually. they started releasing the pro-byler agenda from its tightly locked enclosure AFTER the volume where mike tells will hawkins isn’t the same without him and will brings the painting “for somebody he likes” when they go to pick mike up, IN PREPARATION for the volume where will gives said painting to mike along with an extremely emotional nameswapped love confession and mike turns around and gives a stilted and phony confession to his girlfriend. why the hell was attention being drawn to byler outside of the show itself in that interval if not to make people recontextualize what they just saw in v1??? and then when they see v2 have that recontextualization validated when will is confirmed to be both gay and in love with mike??? and to pick up on the fact that mike and el’s relationship is on more rocks than your average pile of gravel???

we know that they’ve had actors straight up lie to the audience before, too, because even if u just take noah as an example he said in a JUNE interview that will’s sexuality was up to interpretation, and then not that long at all after v2 dropped he did the iconic “will is gay and in love with mike” interview!!! and obviously he knew that will was confirmed gay when he did the first interview bc they had filmed that scene like a year earlier. so the fact that he never rlly mentioned byler, except for vaguely negatively when he was a kid, until v1 comes out and “SUDDENLY” he’s byler’s biggest warrior doesn’t mean he randomly changed his mind, it means he hadn’t been allowed to talk about it until after volume 1. after the first half of the season that made the majority of byler shippers see it as a genuine possibility and even the most likely outcome.

sorry i have no idea how much sense this makes and i’ve completely derailed whatever i was talking about at the top of this post. has anybody pointed this out??? have i pointed this out and i just forgot??? help?!!?!??

[wanderrlust0]

:s

im home now and im glad me and him got high today bc i dont think i wouldve been able to be okay emotionally and pretend like everythings good. i just read my last journal post and i just started crying. like i gave him till the very last minute to say i love you to me and he didnt so i whispered it as i got ready to get out of the car and he then whispered it back. like, he wasnt gonna say it if i hadnt said it. he just said it bc i said it but i can tell it was like empty words like wtf i feel like he doesnt really love me anymore rn and ive done absolutely nothing wrong like its unfair and im tired of it. he hasnt been himself since tuesday. first he wasnt himself when i saw him sunday. then i forced him to talk about it a little. then he was good monday, saying good morning, goodnight, using :3 a lot. then tuesday he just went back to the dryness and sounding uninterested. stopped saying goodnight and goodmorning to me. its now thursday (technically) we hung out. i texted in caps goodmorning bc he again just started saying stuff. i feel like he was only okay today bc he was high. he was touching me a lot but mostly my ass bc i wore a skirt. i didnt mind it ofc but i did sorta feel like he was mostly touching me in a sexual way and less romantic way. he is so fixated on my friend who he doesnt like and thinks id cheat with. bunny stop being insecure..honestly. i feel like its def that and his inability to fully trust me is what the main problem is. like he was barely loving meD: i can tellll when he genuinely does bc he shows it but today and these past few days just felt so casual and not full of effort. like why the fuck am i really crying right now like idk how im feeling bc im like ofc hurt and im confused and tired and annoyed and upset and sad and it feels less fun. i always end up doing most of the talking when hes like this bc itll make me so uncomfortable to sit in silence. like theres a good silence and a weird silence. i used the bathroom and left my phone on the table. ik he most likely scrolled thru my notifications. like im sure he def did. he was standing right there. even tho it was locked and he cant see the details of the notifs ik i have nothing to hide. the thing is how long is it gonna take for him to have some faith in me and stop doubting me and treating me like im a copy of everyones past mistakes. i think now im really actually not gonna act like things dont affect me and show more dryness or annoyance or distance. whatever i feel towards him ill reciprocate or stop pretending like its nothing. he didnt answer my text where i sent him a video that i thought was cute and funny and i wanted him to see it too. no acknowledgement from that. he hasnt sent me an ig reel in days. he stopped saying goodnight and goodmorning. he did now. the edible made him happier today and same with me. we drank and it made us both sleepy. idk what hes feeling towards me. he doesnt really share everything bc he thinks that it doesnt make a diff if we talk about it or not bc he feels like nothing will change and its pointless. i obviously disagree and i feel like we def have to talk, whether itll make a diff or not. it will do something. itll help us understand each other more. itll help us see things in a diff perspective. itll help us clear the air and get rid of the elephant thats lowkey in the room. i wish he wasnt so insecure in times like these. i wish he was more confident with himself. i wish he would really just love me unconditionally and not question our love. i wish i didnt have to tiptoe around the topic of my friend. i wish hed pay attention to whats in front of him and realize how great we can be. hes like a part of me now and i cant see myself without him and i desperatelyy wish hed just understand thatD; im trying and doing my best. i love him to pieces, but if i feel that hes losing interest, it makes me lose interest and i emotionally feel less of a connection to who he is. its like i love him and want him close by but his energy isnt the same person and i miss him againnn. hes back to caring less

[spilledmilkfkdies]

I am sincerely asking you to rant under this ask about the Wizards 🥰 I would like to see it. -Jester

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Some of these things have been said before, some even by me, but I'm just gonna hGVHVhbb it all in here anyway-

The wizards were done DIRTY

And I'm not just saying that because favouritism, they were genuinely done dirty in more ways than one. I'm gonna try to avoid jumping from point to point and make it all cohesive and whatnot, but if it happens, it happens:

Their set up was good. Fairy hunting wizards who basically won and are the reason there is no magic on Earth anymore is neat.

Did there have to be a reason for that? Not really. But besides the messy 'if they thought Bloom was the last Earth fairy, why did they only come for her now?', it doesn't exactly harm anything either, at least it's not as egregious as some other things that were added over the course of the show imo-

Really, Earth basically had its own conflict kinda separate from the magical dimension, which is fine.

But this is more or less also where the problem starts? See, the conflict by itself is so very interesting and filled with potential, yet we don't get to hear a lot about it. Which honestly harms the season as a whole, but definitely the wizards as characters and villains. For when the exposition was scraped from the funky season lore blender, the majority of their motivation seems to have been left behind, stuck to the inside of the blender. And that is not good.

If we take a step back and look at the things we've been told- Not shown. Told- It seems to be a rough mix of them wanting to control nature, rule the planet, those things- But? Why? And?? Not really?

I think 'why' as a question speaks for itself, like what would make them try to achieve those rough yet basic goals. I don't feel like those goals are even what they were doing though lowkey? Because yeah, it's not 100% clear how much time has passed between them locking away the Earth fairies and them coming after Roxy, and you could argue that they were too caught up with the hunt to ever get to ruling the planet- But all of that aside. They're really just not. Ruling the planet. They are hanging out. Good for them but huh.

Y'know it's also interesting how, after mostly achieving the 'no more Earth fairies' part of their ''plan''- What, realistically, kept them from continuing their hunt on different planets? Was it Roxy? Would they have kept going after that? Would they even be able to?

Because when Bloom gets sucked into the portal and it doesn't work, Ogron tells the other wizards that "It's the universe spirits, the Circle has rejected her." Sir? The what? These are NEVER brought up again, and some might consider that basic first episode bs and it was simply written out- But in terms of reasoning why they only go after Earth fairies, it's more or less all we got. So is it safe to say there is some sort of entity connected to the Circle that rejects certain fairies? Then why would their fairy magic immunity cover fairies as a whole? Or is that not connected in any way for whatever reason?

It sucks because the scenario of the wizards not being able to drain any fairy that isn't from Earth, as well as the one where it's a conscious decision because their conflict is with Earth fairies and not anyone else, are good?? You could do stuff with either?? If the Circle does have an entity that limits them, does that mean they got their task from someone else? If the fairies of Earth are their only enemies, what's the reason for that? If the show wasn't so horrified by the idea of fleshing out the wizards as villains specifically, we could've seen more of that side of the Earth fairies that was ever so shyly hinted at when they got mad at humanity for ''abandoning them''. So really, a better season overall- But I digress.

Can we also acknowledge how there are no proper interactions between the wizards and the major fairies?? Like you can't just say "She hates us!!" then have the most normal conversation I've ever seen right after pls- Y'all have HISTORY. SHOW US. One little fight with a possessed Roxy does not count.

Moving on to the wizards as characters, in terms of personality and dynamic with each other- As much as I want to disagree with the pretty common take of them being bland and forgettable, there's a reason I've seen maybe 40 different character interpretations for each of them, and rarely having a moment of 'hey, that doesn't fit at all'. Because there is just so much room to add stuff. Pretty significant stuff. That you can just give them. And it would work. Which is fun, but I don't think it's a good sign per se.

Funnily enough!! Someone who doesn't seem to be good at doing this is Rainbow themselves!!

I cannot say with full certainty when some of these things were written, maybe they were made as the characters were created, I don't know- What I can say however, is that it was released separately from the show and some of it simply does not work. Whether it was sadly forgotten about during the writing of the season, or it was created afterwards in an attempt to add some characterization, not all of it clicks. It's a shame watching some of this stuff be reduced to fun facts that nobody who doesn't already somewhat care for the wizards would ever go looking for, when it should've just been in the season itself to begin with.

Can I also just mention how I find it funny that they took one of the few things people generally seem to like about the wizards as a group, that being how they really seem to care about each other, and decided to just write over that? Lmao?? Like you though they were friends? Wrong <3 Ogron is using them <3 And Duman hates Gantlos and Anagan so they decided to just hate him back <3

Anyway, I really would have liked some solid personality when it mattered most, but asking that when they were written to suddenly not care about the death of one of their own, and were referred to as 'Ogron and his men' so often that people don't know/want to know the other wizards' names, it's probably too big of an ask. But this ties in with the motivation point-

I want to know who they are!! Why are they hunting fairies!! What are their thoughts about the past!! Which major fairy did they struggle with most when in battle!! Why do they keep hiding in the smelliest places when Duman has sensitive animal senses!! Last one I'm extra curious about tbh, it feels cruel.

Idk how to smoothly transition to this point, I'm sleepy and not sure where to put it- But why do the wizards fight so poorly? For people with as much experience as them, of course. That's like one of the few things we are told about them all the time, they're supposed to be experienced. They got foiled by an actual dog btw. It's so obvious the Winx were written to be weaker at the start of season 4, like the issue was with them and it was bad. I know it's probably hard to make any enemy feel like a proper threat after the delicious meal that was Valtor, but surely there's a better way to do it than this? Insert situational transformation point, kinda-

Do not let their experience be a lie, is what I'm trying to say. You did it in the show, you did it in the comics, you did it in the games- Stop it. You want 4 successful war lords that have been around each other long enough to work well as a team and have become a no no topic on other planets because of how much of a threat they are? It sounded like that's what you wanted. So why didn't you commit? Cowards? Is that what you are? Are you cowards?

I'm not sure if I said everything I wanted to say but this ask has been awaiting an answer for a good while and I'm very sleepy. If I think of anything else or suddenly remember stuff I'll throw it somewhere mwah <3

[egyptian-sun-god]

Autistic Ppl of Tumblr

I beg of you please help me....

So I've been recently told by an autistic friend of mine, hey you reflect a lot of traits that got me diagnosed, maybe look into it. I have and I'm lowkey connecting with a lot of things so I need someone who's had similar experiences to objectively to look at this mess and tell me if anything resonates? I beg help.

Right so some things which to me feel like very clear traits are

I always feel like everyone is like me. Which makes me struggle with empathy because I don't fully get why someone would be mad about something that doesn't make me mad. I once teased a mutual about something that personally if they'd teased me about I would've been fine but was told ayo that's not cool. And I genuinely didn't fully understand why they'd not be cool with what i said.

I don't really get what's socially okay or not okay. Example would be I say stuff that other people say to each other but its okay for them and not okay for me because they're close so they can say that to each other and I'm not close w them so I shouldn't say that which didn't fully make sense but I accepted it. Also I tend to cut into conversations which is also rude.

I went 2 years being very severely bullied but I didn't realize it because I thought that's just how ppl were. Cause people in my old school also made fun of me but I made fun back so I just thought that's how kids are but apparently I was severely bullied; For context, I'm brown so when ppl touched me they used to mimic washing their hands or make a whole deal about sanitizing their hands. I got pushed down stairs, my stuff would get hidden, lunch getting tossed out, laughed at for my accent or like my demeanor in class.

I mimicked a lot of things other people say. Like someone around me would say something and I'd repeat it instantly. Didn't fully know why, it always just felt like an instinctual thing. Even now I mimic the way people speak instinctually as a way to connect and feel more natural in the conversation

Leading with that I also copied how other people acted in social situations as sort of a social script on how to be? Like I'd see my friends talk and try to mimic the way they spoke or like what they were interested in to connect with them.

I overthink the smallest things like oh is this person mad at me? Have I done something or said something? They haven't messaged me since day 1 of like highly specific moment maybe we aren't friends anymore. Like when I first made friends with someone very quickly that I didn't expect I literally analysed it to a science with a friend because I didn't know if we were actually friends or was I just dreaming it or something. And this happens with every single friendship till I get some obvious verbal confirmation that me and a person are friends.

I get very defensive or argumentative about what I think is right or fair or what should be the normal even when I shouldn't be arguing or it is pointless to argue. My father always says I argue for the sake of arguing which I don't think is really true, I'm just trying to prove my point which I think is right. I'm working on learning when to just shut up and apologize and move on tho.

I HATE HATE HATE having my stuff moved around without my knowledge. So my mum cleaning my desk or moving my stuff always sends me half into a fit. I'd much rather move things myself. I dislike other people touching my stuff with a passion. When my parents had to move houses and they had to open my drawers without me being there I was so paranoid and stressed on call even though I didn't have anything to hide. I just felt stressed, I suppressed it tho cause I felt like it wasn't the right thing to express? But I still remember how on edge I was.

I struggle with certain senses. Like what was fine 2 minutes ago in terms of noise and people and lighting can very quickly go into a stress or panic attack type feeling where everything just feels dialled on 200% and I need to leave ASAP. Sensory overload may be the term for this.

I had a very strong aversion to certain foods and textures growing up. I think I have somewhat grown out of this or have learned to firm it and move on, but as a child it was terrible. I still get very nervous when my friends are like oh you should try new foods because I'm always scared I'll hate them and I will waste it or I just don't know how it's going to taste like so I don't really want to take any risks.

I talk a lot and I talk for hours on end about my interest and it doesn't really affect me when the people around me don't actively listen to me. I just continue rambling and go on tangents here and there

I can't sit still and I always feel very understimulated. I feel like my brain needs more things to work. There's a running joke I need to be at a 90% stress level for optimal studying

I'm very time-blind. I'm perpetually late to everything in life. Like I look at the time and I'm like oh yes showering and eating will only take me half an hour surely ill make it by 2.30. sike, i only leave my house at 3.45. That sort of vibe.

I struggle a lot with remembering overall things but certain things I can recall down to a science. I can't remember where I kept my phone last but I can remember my friend's bubble tea order from years ago.

There's a lot of times people have to tell me to be quieter because I'm too loud for the setting. I can't really control my volume well, I try but it slowly just goes back to default

This is a hyper-specific memory but someone was like asking yo do you know what rizz means to the general group and i automatically chimed that it meant charisma and everyone was disappointed cause apparently I wasn't supposed to answer that question but i didn't actually know and I felt bad after.

I bite the skin of my fingers all the time to the point fingerprinting me is a bit of a pain. I can't fully stop it even when I actively try to. its a very automatic thing when I'm just in any situation.

I don't get arbitrary social rules. Like I always bother people for the why in everything

I have to usually confirm when people are joking.

I weirdly am very social though. I love meeting new people, I'm a big extrovert I LITERALLY cannot survive without talking to people. Talking to people is a big source of stimulation and energy for me. I get very depressed if I haven't had one good conversation with someone in a day.

I'm also a social butterfly and I'm kinda good with small talk and casual conversation and keeping the flow in a conversation going naturally (though this is a fairly recent development from like high school only)

I'm told I'm a very honest and direct person and I have no problems being open about my problems and issues and deep shit to people in the first conversation we have. I thought this was normal...apparently its weird

I feel all of my emotions very deeply and getting lied to or having promises be broken is a very deep hurt for me. Like even the smallest things can lead to full sadness cry and the tiniest W can be like the cause of singing joy.

I don't think I stim.....but sometimes I'll just move my hands or feet randomly because I feel unstimulated and I need to just feel something so I move around. And when I'm on a panic attack I rock back and forth and sing to myself. But I think thats normal

I used to get very stressed over talking on a phone call to make orders or like ask for anything on phone and even today sometimes I'll need to rehearse what I'm gonna say to the person on call. Its gotten better though, I no longer dread calling customer service.

I don't really have a set routine for the day either. I'm quite spontaneous but certain things I feel weird without. Like if I shower at night I hate it. I need to shower before I start my day. I need a cup of milo/tea or else I just feel weird the whole day. Or something that is a routine is that I have a wet drying rack for my dishes and a dry drying rack and I cannot put wet dishes on the dry drying rack at all costs even after my flatmates have said no one follows that rule.

I struggle with paying attention in class but I take good notes and I study well and I'm overall a fairly academically strong student. But like sometimes class is just boring and I just need more energy. And I can't sit still to save my life.

So yh that was a rant. Is any of the relatable?

[iheartsyaosaku]

Clear card pros and cons (that i can remember i need to reread it again)

Pros:

SYAOSAKU DATING ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

idk more content around our fave characters (though not as much but take it as you will)

The wierd ass technology update all of a sudden everyone has iphones (minus syaoran)

It picked up from the og ending where syaoran comes back from hong kong

SYAOSAKU DATING 🥹🥹🥹

SYAOSAKU WENT ON A DATE ‼️‼️

Unlocked sakura new swag (at the cost of ending her cardcaptor retirement…)

(Anime only) english dub actors of trc syaosaku voice ccscc syaosaku i thought that was pretty cool (syaoran sounds like maybe he went through puberty a little too early but thats okay)

(Anime only) SYAORAN SPEAKS FRENCH IN THE ENGLISH DUB

cute art style

Maybe just me but sometimes i get a little emotional seeing sakura in her daily life in middle school because its like !! Wow i remember when you were in 4th grade and now you’re in 7th grade im so proud of you sakura 🥹

Momo (new mascot to make marketable plushie off of)

(Anime only) MEILING COMEBACK ‼️

THE SYAOSAKU SONG HOSHI NO TEGAMI 😭😭😭😭😭 BEST SONG EVERRRR WTF SYAORANS SINGING VOICE IS SO!:?:)/$/? THEYRE SUCH A GOOD DUET

SYAOSAKU DATING. Btw. Theyre a couple. Theyre dating and theyre in love.

Cons:

KAITO.

New characters who happen to be mediocre

Akiho is literally just a carbon copy of sakura who is just sad (they refused to touch on the different aspects of her like reading books, singing and from kong kong only very rarely)

Kaito fucking sucks literally worst ccs of all time and THATS A LOT saying theres literal PEDOS in the fucking show but theyre all background characters but they can also piss off

Tbf i got confused along the way

Too many plot holes

Syaosaku angst

Syaosaku couldnt touch for a while 😔

Anyway why did yelan do that (referring to point above)

Some shit does not make sense

Tsubasa/xxxholic references (this is for you oomf)

Syaoran???? Is part of the “im keeping things from sakura” gang???? And it sucks so bad (yes it got resolved in the later half BUT IT STILL SUCKED)

TOO MANY THINGS KEPT FROM SAKURA JUST TELL HER DAMN

pushes most characters from the og manga aside to focus on akiho and that man 🙄🙄🙄

Clamp forces us to care about them but in reality we really do not gaf

(In reference to point above) Clamp sees that and pushes the nostalgia tactics/references sometimes and its lowkey tiring

The part where the syao/saku/tomo were reminiscing that fuck ass teacher made me ill i genuinely wanted to kms

Still hasnt gotten rid of their p*do ass shit thanks clamp very cool (sarcasm)

Did i mention that the og characters were pushed back? Because they really were

Akiho felt more of the main character of this story instead of sakura

Tbh not much happened in the entirety of this manga ESPECIALLY considering time shenanigans

Im still mad that syaoran hid stuff from sakura tbh

HOW CAN I FORGET THE UGLY ASS “YUNAAKI IS SIMILAR TO SYAOSAKU” PARALLELS AND HOW BADLY IT PISSES ME OFF

syaosaku dont look but theres an ugly bitch trying to be like you (yunaaki)

Yunaaki becoming borderline canon despite it being a toxic and p*dophilic ship

Kaito still exists in this fucking story and got a somewhat happy ending (befriending syaoran dont piss me the fuck off)

COMPARING KAITO TO SYAORAN KYS @ CLAMP

Kero/tomoyo/yue/nakuru/spinnel basically everyone magically involved is pushed back basically useless until the final act (i think i mentioned the character pushback before)

Still major plotholes

Yamazaki tells the truth now

Touya got whitewashed

Akiho still has too many similarities to sakura it still pisses me off. Why cant they make her her own character

My girl sakura developed anxiety

MY BOY SYAORAN DEVELOPED DEPRESSION

angsty ass middle schoolers

Didnt like the scene where sakuras grandad was basically throwing shade at syaoran comparing his romance with sakura to … sakura’s fuckass dad grooming her mom. What

Syaoran calmed down a bit i miss when he was chaotic af but whatever #middleschoolerthings

Season 2 is taking forever to release good lord

[ladymorghul]

Just to make it clear I didn’t mean people are being dramatic because they’re getting attacked. Of course everyone is allowed to defend themselves and no one should ever be attacked over fictional characters. And this is exactly why I said everyone is a bit too dramatic because on one side as a Helaemond I get hated for being a Helaemond and on the other side I get excluded for not agreeing or liking the "Helaena’s children are Aemond’s" theory. The fandom in general is such a mess and everyone is so on edge about every little thing. Fact is not one ship in Hotd is unproblematic. Whether it’s Alysmond, Helaemond or Helaegon all three of these ships have some kind of sketchy vibe on them. Though I have to disagree that everyone should suddenly be okay or comfortable with incest just because it’s one aspect of the show. I mean rape, misogyny and other bad things are also inherent to the show but that doesn’t mean we have to like or be comfortable with it. A large age-gap is not the same as incest imo so again I do understand why not everyone is on board with Helaemond or any other incest ship for that matter. What’s not okay is to attack someone because they ship it. I think the only ship that really really makes me uncomfortable and that actually deserves the hate it gets is Lucemond tbh.

well, if it helps, you won't get hate from me for not believing the children theory or not wanting it to be true specifically as i wasn't its biggest rider either. i mean i've always considered it a realistic possibility, but as an alicent fan i cringed at the amount of hate that would double because of it because she's a "hypocrite", even tho the circumstances are different from viserys.

i've gradually came to embrace it and just psychologically prepare myself to get jumped for still standing in my girl's corner.

however recently i've also started to post about it just because of people see it as a reason to bully others. like you will have people post that picture of that supposed jaehaera casting next to aemond and say something really mild like "copy paste" and get death threats but a post that puts her next to aegon and says "she got x from her dad" doesn't. imagine if i started commenting about people also supposedly "romantcizing incest" and lowkey dismissing the possibile dub con of jaehaera's existance as a child of a forced marriage and use this to say really shitty stuff like "go kys" and "stop using children to fulfill your nasty fantasies"

so because i always saw it as a realistic direction the show could take i said fuck it, let's post some about this and spite some people. because hypocritical bullies should get pushed back down on their asses every time.

(however if it does become canon, i'll likely be in these kids' corner trying to protect them from b&c and discourse w my bare hands 😂)

but still... i don't think the hate one might get for being a helaemond shipper but not a children theory supporter (whoever sent you hate / bullied you over that sucks) compres to the hate campaign ran against helaemonds as a whole for months by alysm*nds. and now by helaeg*ns too.

gonna have to disagree w the incest aspect tho simply bc many if not most antis who hate helaem*nd support helaeg*n or some other form of incest, like aegond, rhaemond, etc. in fact i had someone try to explain to me that it's not the same thing if they're cousins. and still, i would hope that universally anti incest uncomfortable people would spend their time blocking and muting rather than, idk, sending anon hate. seems more productive to me.

anyway this is getting long but i think my bottom line is this: i get that you probably had some experience maybe that you felt you were sidelined for not believing in the children theory and i think that's valid, but looking at the bigger picture, the helaem*nd fandom is, for a lack of a better word, stressed out and while i myself have my own gripes w opinions of other helaem*nds on certain things, i also kind of get how things can get tense

but to come back to this: if you don't think that the children are aemond's, or don't want them to be aemond's, that's fine with me!