#mickey literally kicking his feet and giggling

[izzyspussy]

anyway. from my experience with people grudgingly, hopelessly meeting the expectations put on them regardless of if those expectations were 'low' or 'high' or how much of a burden and/or painful confinement filling that role was for them - and in fact my experience with BEING one of those people (in both directions), and with plentiful support from the text before it became wall spaghetti...

i think mickey would get a lot of fulfillment from being expected to take care of someone, be a primary member of someone's support system, to know and understand and anticipate (within reason) someone else's needs, to be relied on and trusted.

his life from birth has come with the certainty from others - parents, teachers, peers, law enforcement, social workers, neighbors, distant bystanders to whom he's a theoretical or a statistic - that he will be a selfish, deadbeat, low-life criminal dirtbag. he'll be a shitty kid, a shitty student, a dropout, a criminal. he'll make a shitty fucking lover and a shitty fucking boyfriend and someday a shitty fucking husband and/or shitty father, if he manages to even make it that far. he'll be his own shitty, selfish, deadbeat, low-life criminal dirtbag father's willing lackey for life. he surely can't be that smart, he's naturally violent, and if he wasn't born pre-equipped with his family's signature absence of morals he's guaranteed to absorb it by puberty. expecting any better of him is just a waste of resources.

but then look at his actual character. iirc his literal character introduction is him protecting mandy. that he enacts his care via violence does not change that he is in fact acting with care (and i would argue that if ian actually had done what it's implied mandy accused him of, mickey's reaction would be pretty close to proportional lol).

the very first time his relationship with ian progresses, it's because ian tells mickey he needs him - paired with the fact that mickey refuses when ian just asks to see him, and has textually shown immediate risk to not doing so, but can't resist need. he seems not just jealous about ian's older lovers, but also to feel some type of way about their ages specifically - and eventually vengefully extorts them for it.

he starts beef with sasha when he realizes she's paying svetlana unfairly, and while it can be argued - and is completely understandable - that mickey doesn't give a shit about svetlana personally at this point, this is still a protective/providing act; if svetlana doesn't make enough money, the whole household suffers. personally, i would also argue that this plotline, though it goes very badly and mickey ends up doing worse - in some ways - by those women than sasha, is actually a moment of character development for mickey independent of his relationship to ian; he is attempting, on his own, to form and act upon an internal sense of right and wrong; in my opinion this could have been built on even though this specific instance was not successful. and it's not even in all ways that he's worse than sasha. he has no real obligation to find a solution to the situation he caused, even less so for the women other than his wife, but he does (even though it's a downgrade). and once he's taken that responsibility, he does extend his protective violence to "[his] girls". when somebody hits one of them, he makes a house call to that guy's place and not only kicks the shit out of him, but also tells on him to his wife to a) humiliate him in addition to beating him and b) ensure that he'll have longer lasting consequences than mickey can inflict. but of course all of this was narratively forgotten as soon as it wasn't convenient lol.

(he also looooves to make people dig their holes deeper with him. but that's not strictly on topic, just something that makes me giggle and kick my feet and draw little hearts around his name in my notebook. on the other hand, maybe i'll talk about his performative anger - telegraphed, loud - versus his genuine anger - quiet, calculated, with confidence in his ability to back it up that often makes it look like amusement. some other post.)

he also makes an earnest offer to assist with domestic labor while staying with the gallaghers - and is immediately judged for and dismissed as insincere for not knowing how.

so. while of course there would be the initial panic and defensiveness at the sudden shift, the certainty that he really can't be like that and asking him to is unfair, i think with just a little bit of understanding and encouragement, mickey would actually be not just willing to take on a caretaker type of role but happy to. lowkey flattered to have even been considered a legitimate option, validated by having the related expectations placed on him when he accepts, and fulfilled and rewarded by then actually performing the role. i think it would be hurtful and deeply insulting to him to be 'relieved' of the part on the basis of the belief that he couldn't or wouldn't want to do it. devastating, in fact.

AND! he would be pretty damn good at it, after an adjustment period. even with only low expectations to live down to and/or the only high expectations for him being of the non-caring variety, mickey still found ways to be protective, caring, and a provider that were doable within the context of his environment - whenever he doesn't think it's impossible to succeed.

(and say the shift wasn't really that sudden. say he had someone very important to him gradually increasing their expectations of him over a period of three or four years, someone he was close to who knew him very well, maybe even better than anyone else ever has, telling him every now and then "i know you can do better. i want better from you." just say, for example. like. hypothetically.)

contrast to ian, who has instead been living up to unasked for expectations his whole life. he's expected to help with his younger siblings, to contribute domestically and financially to his household, to hold down a steady job that his family relies on for basic needs as a young teenager. he's so smart, he's so charming, he's so sweet-looking; he's expected to excel academically, to have well-defined and locked-in ambitions for his far future Right Now, to be polite and level-headed and respectable at all times. he's 'so mature for his age' and 'resilient' - i.e. adults rely on him to fulfill their needs, and to not need anything from them in return. frank expects him to be able to take a few hits without being affected; monica expects him to be her best friend without needing her to be his mom; fiona expects him to need less of her attention than debbie, carl, or liam, and sometimes even than lip; kash not only has sex with him, but also expects him to meet kash's adult emotional needs, and gets violent and mean when ian doesn't do so. he's expected to come to mandy's rescue, and to patiently hold mickey's hand through his personal growth.

and most importantly, ian is expected to never, ever, ever do or say or think or feel anything that frank or monica would. or even to understand it. and when he has no choice but to have something fundamental in common with monica, he is immediately expected to behave exactly like her in every way, regardless of any other aspect of his own individual personality - which is the opposite of the first set of expectations in the worst possible way.

so again. while ian would be initially defensive and resistant to it out of conditioned pride for Not Needing, it would be an overall positive and healing experience for him to be taken care of (also again, within reason). to be doted on. to be the center of someone's attention without the expectation to cater to them because of it. to be able to feel his feelings and express them and not make sense and have it all be accepted even if it's not understood. to be able to fail and it not be the end of the fucking world, or a sign of the inevitable worse to come. to have the space and support to try a bunch of shit and fail at some of it and give some of it up and succeed but still move on to something else. to have someone who wants to know every little thing about him, all the good stuff and bad stuff and neutral boring stuff, who is glad to know every new thing they find out even if it's not what they were expecting or what they wanted to hear. someone who understands and is okay with it if he doesn't know some of that stuff either.

and. btw. all this is perfectly compatible as-is with their established/extrapolate-able sexual dynamic of mickey as the impatient masochistic bottom brat size queen who wants - or sometimes needs - to be 'convinced', and ian as the demanding selfish hard-to-impress hypersexual sadist top who wants his ego serviced as much as his body, both of them rough and tumble tough guys. BTW. By The Fucking Way. and fyi.

[sluttymickey]

hi hi flirty husband anon once again can’t sleep and am thinking about them and how desperately i wish canon showed more casual sweet moments later on because I think the juxtaposition of the dramatic nature of their relationship and kisses in the first half of the show with the comfortable, safer, more settled nature of the later seasons would just be so good. Like don’t get me wrong, I love everything we did get but I would pay good money for Mickey to kiss his husbands forehead when his husband isnt low or Ian to hug him outside of the comforting in the last episode. But anyway enough complaining i am thinking about KISSES and all the small and sweet ones and how I bet the first few times Ian kissed Mickeys cheek he had to psyche himself up first and was sooo 😳🦋😌 afterwards and now its just like HE GETS TO DO THAT EVERYDAY!!! TO HIS HUSBAND!!!! FOREVER!!!! and Mickey will still sometimes get that dazed look in his eyes or pull back blushing but for the most part he just smiles up at Ian and then goes back to whatever hes doing. Oh and we were also robbed of nose kisses and Ian scrunching his face and smiling so big and stupid when Mickey leans up to kiss his nose. Also I have already brought this up but it is because i know in my soul that Ian is always kissing Mickey’s stomach and when they were younger Mickey would pull back and hint at ian to move somewhere else because shit that feels weird and is too gentle in a way that makes his skin burn but later when they are married Ian will kiss all over his tummy and sides and Mickey will just giggle a bit and repeat Ian’s name because its ticklish and maybe also kick his feet a bit but never push Ian away and enjoy smiling and laughing and being silly with his husband okay exiting my soapbox now good night take care 💛

Hello!! Hello <333 missed seeing you in my inbox!!

Literally!! It's ABOUT THE CASUAL INTIMACY 😭🥺

Kisses 🥺🥺 I love blushy mickey getting his first soft lovey dovey kisses 🥺🥺 and even after all this time he's just 😊☺️ after every kiss!! Like this:

Nose kisses 🥺 I'm a SUCKER for Mickey being able to be soft now 🥺 see also: tummy kisses 🥺 freckles kisses 🥺 hand kisses 🥺

Also I'm SENSITIVE about them being soft about each other's tummies!! The kisses!! Blowing raspberries sometimes lol. Laughter in bed is one of the BEST forms of intimacy 😭 just them existing and being giggly and soft in their own little bubble 🥺

(talking about tummies, mickey in DIY crop tops in the summer!! Thoughts???)

[sharpth1ng]

You're delivery of Dickey headcanons are here sir👍

Derek was totally the type of guy to be raised in a 'gentleman' home, his parents raising him to have literally the best manners (he has his own book of manners, he tried asking Mickey to read it and Mickey laughed in his face)

Its gotten to the point where Derek and Mickey will literally fight each other to pay the Bill after eating out. (Unless its Dereks birthday then Mickey hides his wallet and pays for him)

If they ever fought Derek would ne the first to apologize and he'd just cuddle Mickey right after

They'd try to be that cute couple amd try to cuddle in bed but in the morning they'd end up sprawled out or in weird positions

Mickey is in fact a leash child to this day

Mickey doesn't really like big fancy dinners as much a Derek, but will go if it makes him happy (and Secretly enjoy.)

They have a cute little playlist they made together

If they ever did that window scene, I think after their little intimate moments he'd do it once or twice a week. (Maybe three times if hes had a bad day yk)

Once Derek called him Mickey Mouse so Mickey got back at him by calling him 'Minnie'

Derek sings for him. Like Mickey will request a song for his birthday or on another special occasion and Derek will just sing to him while Mickey is just blushing, giggling, kicking his feet lmfao

-⭐️

Omg yeah Derek having southern gentleman etiquette, Mickey having goblin raised in a trashcan etiquette

tbh I feel like Mickey will always allow Derek to pay, I feel like this bitch is not fighting for the bill he's like oh, you want to pay? Go for it, this dick is worth it

And yeah 10000% Derek is apologizing first and he's definitely not the one who needs to apologize most of the time

Mickey being a glutton for snuggles and also being a starfish and a blanket hog in bed

I feel like Mickey likes seeing Derek in his gentleman mode, he thinks its cute and likes to tease him for it

Mickey keeps trying to sneak horny shit onto their playlist

Mickey popping up at the window midday. Derek: "you know I have a front door right? Its like, 1pm, my parents will let you in"

bahaha Mickey and Minnie

Mickey teasing Derek while he's singing because he's actually having an anime nosebleed moment

Yeaaahhh they're cute!

[rae-gar-targaryen]

OMG OMG OMG!! I just read my cup runneth over [mickey “fanboy” garcia x fem!reader, aka “cielo”] 😆😆

And I have one question for you. WJERE CAN I FIND A CHRISTMAS LOVE LIKE THAT?? I MEAN COME ON! I am a single gal and all i want to be wrapped in the warmth of Mickey's love and embrace EVERY DAY.

1. And, really, Mickey was usually the warm one, his touch like your own personal sun. But you had been in the kitchen, opening and closing the oven door, its warmth blasting across your cheeks. It was Mickey’s turn, he noted, to delight in the warmth of you, of your skin, as his hand cupped your cheek with the reverence of wintertime romance. And if you’d noticed that Mickey’s fingers were cold from when he’d been out in the crisp evening air, you hadn’t said. Too wrapped up in the comfort that his presence gave.

I am just gonna say it. I am all for this sun and moon vibes they give off!! Mickey is sunshine, he is always up in the air and flying. He provides energy and illuminates the world around cielo!! 😍☺️🫠 Cielo is moonlight filled with enlightenment and love that brings comfortable and joy. Sorry if I'm reaching 🤭

2. “My apologies, beloved,” and Mickey looked the very picture of penitent, as he unwrapped his arms from you, clasping them behind his back, eyes cast down with a contrite flutter of the fringe of his lashes.

Beloved. BEloved. BELOVED. I AM GIDDY BRO. GOT ME KICKING MY FEET AND SQUEALING MAN. . . I LOVE IT!!

3. Quick as a flash, Mickey lunged forward, swatting your behind with both hands, leaving large, white flour handprints on the black of your leggings. 

I gasped SO LOUD that my coworker thought I was reading bad news lol 🤣 I went into a fit of giggles 😂

Again, your writing is so lovely to read. Can't wait for the next pieces!💜💚

Babe, my darling, my sweet -- I will NEVER, EVER tire of getting these asks from you. Thank you for reading, as always, thank you for ALL of your kindness. These make my entire day, and make me want to write more, more, more!

I especially love that you picked up on something I've tried to weave in every one of their stories -- you called it the "sun and moon dynamic" and I could not agree more!

In "swallow you like sunshine," it's repeated that to Mickey, Cielo is the sky (hence, the endearment). That he's most at home when in the sky (flying), and with her.

To Cielo, Mickey is like the ocean. Ever flowing, constant, beautiful and vaguely mysterious.

I love this rephrased as the "sun and moon" because the moon (Cielo) literally controls the flow of the ocean with her pull. Ugh, we've created something here, I KNOW we have.

And Mickey is so sunshiney and lovely, how could he not be the sun to cielo's moon?

Bless you for this. Next up, SUNDRESS FIC!

[yesdevineruler]

P.S.A

Ian and Mickey are cuddling right now.

[y0itsbri]

shameless summer series - lifeguard au 🥽🩲🌊

debbie has her eye on the new lifeguard at the public pool. unlucky for her, said lifeguard already has his eye set on a different red-headed gallagher.

(think like s2 era)

also happy a.u.gust! @gallavichthings

words: 1.7k

"Debs, why do I gotta take you to the pool again this week? I thought you already fixed whatever was the problem with that blonde bitch," Ian whined, shoveling cereal into his mouth. Two tubes of sunscreen sat on the table in front of him.

"It's not about her anymore." Debbie retorted, like it was the simplest thing.

"Okay. Then what is it about?"

"Nothing!"

"Ask her boyfriend." Carl yelled over his video game in the living room, taking any opportunity to embarrass his sister.

Ian and Debbie's voices overlapped with a "Boyfriend?!" and "He's not my boyfriend-- Carl I'm going to fucking kill you!"

Debbie tossed a fork at Carl's head.

"Oh, now I'm definitely in," Ian laughed and winced before Debbie could throw a fork his direction.

--

The walk to the pool was relatively quiet aside from the rhythmic smacking of their sandals against the gravely pavement.

Debbie leapt a few strides, trying to outrun her shadow and failing each time. Ian chuckled, pulling the towel around his neck and swinging his keychain with the other hand.

Now that it was just the two of them, he tried again.

"Soooo," he drawled. "What's with this secret boyfriend?"

Debbie sighed. "He's not my boyfriend. Well, not yet."

"Hmm?"

"He's one of the new lifeguards since Justin got attacked by that dog last week."

Justin still owed Lip a beating for something or other so Ian was glad he didn't have to deal with Justin today, at least.

"You think this new lifeguard is a little too old for you?" Ian wondered.

Debbie shrugged. "Not like it matters much."

Ian couldn't argue with that logic. "I'll kick his ass if he bothers you, yeah?"

"Please. He doesn't even look at me. Even when I was fake-drowning." She skipped down the sidewalk, nearing the pool entrance.

Ian shook his head. His sister was something else.

--

After they set their towels down, Ian's eyes scoured the lifeguard chairs immediately. Too-tan-Toni, shrimp-speedo-Sam, and holy-fucking-shit. Was that Mickey Milkovich?

Ian hadn't let himself think about Mickey since he left town. But it was hard not to now that he was right in front of him again. Shit.

Mickey spread out across his chair, sunglasses low on his nose, watching the newcomers and he smirked before glancing back towards the pool. He blew his whistle and yelled at some kid to 'slow the fuck down unless you wanna bust your ass -- and I ain't fixing you up!'

Ian was brought back to the moment by Debbie's hands waving in front of his face. "Helloooo, earth to Ian! Sunscreen?"

Ian could've sworn he heard a chuckle coming from the direction of the lifeguard chair as he dug the sunscreen out of his shorts pockets. No. He was just being paranoid. His cheeks blushed regardless.

"Is that...?" Ian nodded his head towards the raven-haired man.

"Shhh!" Debbie slapped him on the arm. "Don't make it obvious!"

Ian rolled his eyes at her ridiculousness.

He covered Debbie's back and shoulders in the high resistance sunscreen before she took off towards the side of the pool with the diving board, eager to show off her skills.

He yelled after her. "Wait, fuck, Debs you forgot..." He glanced around.

His eyes definitely locked with Mickey's now.

Fuck.

Mickey hopped off his chair, waving his hand to dismiss his crowd of moon-eyed preteen girls and middle-aged women in scandalous bikinis. Ian would have shuddered at the thought if Mickey wasn't making a bee-line directly towards him.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. Fuuuuuck.

"'Sup, man? Been awhile..." He smirked. "Raggedy Ann run out on ya?" Mickey bowed his leg out on his final step towards Ian, a little closer than he expected.

"Uhhh...." Real smooth, Ian. His words were bound to fail him again with the man in such close proximity to him, so he simply held up his bottle of sunscreen and shrugged.

"Toss it here," Mickey coolly demanded.

Ian was thoroughly confused, but threw it anyways. "What?"

"You heard me, Red. Turn around, I'll get your back."

"Protecting and serving the local ginger kids at the pool?" Ian joked weakly, finding his voice again.

Mickey huffed a breath. "Fuck the pigs. The only thing I'm protecting is your ass from a sunburn."

Ian was still confused as to why Mickey was offering to rub his back at a very public pool when he would have literally beaten his ass for looking his direction before.

All of Ian's thoughts subsided as he felt sturdy hands push the warming liquid around his shoulder blades, up his neck, then down his spine. Mickey's thumb digging deep into his muscles. He suppressed his urge to shiver despite the rising temperatures of the hot Chicago summer.

At least he thought he had suppressed it. A huff of air on the back of his neck said otherwise.

Mickey started pulling his hands away and Ian leaned back into them again. Mickey whacked the side of his head before tossing the bottle of sunscreen onto the chair in front of them.

"No free massages, man. Just sunscreen." Mickey licked the corner of his mouth and looked from the ground up to Ian's eyes.

He had to know how devious he looked. Ian didn't want to be presumptuous, but he just held eye contact.

"Unless," Mickey veered, slowly backing away, "the favor was returned in one way or another." He winked.

Ian stood, mouth agape as Mickey turned and waved again to the group of girls who still hadn't taken their eyes off of him. He hopped up onto his chair, whistle in mouth in no time like nothing had ever happened.

What the fuck was going on?

--

Ian spent the next few hours very much Not Looking At Mickey despite feeling a heated stare on him.

Even when he was having a breath-holding competition with Debbie, his brain couldn't stop the endless stream of Mickey Mickey Mickey.

After Debbie's third win, Ian felt like he was on the verge of passing out, so he returned to his towel, chugging his water bottle.

In a moment of weakness, he glanced at Mickey, only to find him already staring. Mickey tilted his head towards the main building and quietly dismissed himself to go on his break.

Ian knew.

He wasn't that stupid. He knew Mickey wanted him to follow. And he knew that it wouldn't be a good idea. All the while, his feet took him closer.

The building felt even hotter than the outside, the AC must've gone out and no one bothering to replace it.

This was a bad idea.

Ian was just about to turn around and leave when he heard the click of a lock.

"'Bout fuckin' time," Mickey stalked forward, eyes raking up and down Ian's body appreciatively.

Ian was putty.

He groaned as he let himself be pulled forward by the hips. "Didn't know you were a lifeguard?"

He sighed as Mickey toyed with the band of his shorts in between his tattooed fingers. His nails scraping dully against his sides.

"Dad got shanked. Family business went under. Had to go legal." Mickey's hands moved upwards as he raked his fingers through the sides of Ian's still-wet hair, gripping onto the back of his neck. Ian slid his own hands up Mickey's back, pushing his red tank top up with it, exposing his pale skin.

"Missed this." It was a whisper.

Ian attached his lips to the side of Mickey's neck briefly, tasting remnants of salt, chlorine, and sunscreen, before Mickey sunk down to his knees. Ian's hands were now gripping dark hair, and he was sure that the rocky pavement of the unfinished building had to be digging into Mickey's skin, but he made no sounds of discomfort.

Sure, he missed this, but he missed him more, not that he could say that.

--

On the walk home, the sun was hanging low in the sky and both Gallaghers' cheeks were sunburnt pink.

"Did ya have fun?" Ian asked, knocking his empty water bottle against the top of Debbie's head.

She scrunched her face up, but replied with some pep in her voice. "Yeah! Today the hot life guard actually looked at me! Maybe bringing you around was good luck."

No way in hell Ian was going to out Mickey to his little sister, let alone out himself. He put on a big-brother reassuring smile and changed the subject.

"Good luck for you maybe. I lost literally all of our competitions today!"

She giggled, "That was all skill, not luck. Frank's been helping me practice!"

Frank? Maybe Ian needed to spend a little more time at home. On the other hand, maybe it was a good thing Ian hadn't been spending a lot of time at home.

--

Ian left after dinner unannounced, taking his well-worn trail to the baseball dugouts.

When he approached the field, he noticed a small orange flame illuminating the man's face and a cloud of smoke fog through the chained fence. He smirked.

"Couldn't get enough the first round?" Ian taunted, announcing his presence as he leapt over the fence, an old habit.

"Fuck you, man," Mickey scoffed and blew his smoky breath in Ian's grimacing face.

"Oh I think you plan on it." He stepped closer.

"Is that so?"

"Mmhmm," Ian plucked the cigarette out of Mickey's fingers. "Can't have you with bad lungs, then what will all the poor defenseless swimmers do without a capable lifeguard?"

"Let 'em drown," Mickey smacked Ian's cigarette out of his hands and closed the distance between them.

"It would crush your groupies to know you care so little," Ian murmured against his neck.

"This is a bad idea," Mickey breathed, tugging at Ian's crumpled shirt.

"The worst," Ian yanked his shirt fully off.

Mickey pulled back, eyeing Ian's now-bare back.

"Mmm, no sunburn. That would've ruined my plans." Mickey smiled smugly.

Oh shit.

Ian swallowed. He was already way too far off the deep end. Luckily for them both, Mickey knew how to swim.

[slutforbuck]

Peter Pan Part 3 -- Mickey x Reader

part 1 part 2 part 4 part 5

“What are you doing here Mickey?” “I went out to get us some breakfast, and when I came back you were gone.” Skeptically you looked at him over the top of your shades, “You went to get..breakfast?” He rubbed the back of his neck and let out a breathy laugh, “Did you think I had just left?” You kicked back to float in the water, your eyes never leaving his. “I figured it was a one night kind of thing. No big deal.” Your head tilted back into the water, letting the sun warm your skin. “Since I didn’t get to buy your breakfast, let me treat you to lunch?” You again looked at him over your shades, feeling a little wary of going out with Mickey again. He is cute. He seems super sweet too..It couldn’t hurt to go to lunch. This doesn’t have to go further than that. “Fine. Pick me up at 1.” Laying your head back in the water, you closed your eyes, hoping to get a minute to yourself without being interrupted again. After a few minutes passed, you opened your eyes to see Mickey still floating in the water next to you. Sighing, you stood up in the water, “Can I help you?” “Yea, let’s go.” He smiled as he grabbed your hand and pulled you to the beach. “Mickey where are we going?” You tried to grab all of your stuff and throw your cover up on as he pulled you to the Vespa. “You’ll see when we get there.”

When Mickey finally parked, you looked around and realized you were in one of the smaller communities in Athens that was filled with tiny cafés and shops that overlooked the ocean. You could feel the sea breeze in your hair as you pulled the helmet from your head and stepped off the Vespa. “Mickey you realize I'm still in my bathing suit right? I’m not dressed for shopping or lunch.” Laughing, he placed his hand on the small of your back and guided you into one of the small dress shops. “I know that, I figured you could just pick something out here and save us some time.” Weaving through the racks of dresses in the small shop, you ran your fingers over the soft dresses before your eyes landed on a beautiful sea blue one that matched Mickey’s eyes. You blushed as you made the connection, your touch lingering on the hem before moving away to another. Intently, Mickey watched you as you smiled to yourself before moving away and declaring that you didn’t see anything that you liked. Once on the sidewalk, Mickey turned to you, “I dropped my keys. Why don't you walk ahead a little and find somewhere for lunch while I go get them?” Before you could reply, he had already disappeared back into the store. He literally had his keys in his pocket. Weird. You shrugged to yourself before walking up the stoney sidewalk, peeking into the small cafés. “Found them!” Mickey jogged to catch up to you, breathing deeply before he caught up to you and smiled. “Find somewhere yet?” Raising an eyebrow at him, you nodded. “Yes! This place overlooks the beach, we could sit outside.” He led you to the patio seats outside, pulled your chair out and helped you sit. “What a gentleman!” He smirked as he sat across from you and leaned forward, propping his chin in his hand. “So what do you do?” “I’m a photographer. I’ve travelled a lot, but Greece has always been my favorite.”

For a couple hours the two of you swapped stories of your time in Greece, and found that you had lived fairly close to each other when you lived in America. You laughed as he told you about all the stupid things that Argyris and their other friend Manos had done when he first moved to Athens. Glancing down at your phone, you realized the two of you had been sitting and talking for hours, “Oh Mickey! I didn’t realize it was so late! You need to hurry or you’ll miss the ferry for your party. Thank you for today, I actually really enjoyed it.” Smiling you leaned down and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek as you slipped out the door of the café. Mickey sat for a minute, stunned that you had kissed him and left, then jumped to his feet, running after you. “Y/n! Wait!” You stopped as you reached the sidewalk, and turned to see Mickey running towards you, his shirt flying behind him. You giggled as he almost tripped over his feet and stopped in front of you. “Mickey are you okay?” “Did you forget that you said you’d go to this party with me?” You looked to him, and then motioned to your clothes. “I’m not exactly party ready.” He smiled as he reached behind him and pulled out the sea blue dress that you had been staring at in the store. “You seemed to like this so…I went back and got it for you.” A proud smile spread across his tanned face and his blue eyes sparkled when you gently took the dress from his hands. “You bought this? For me? Mickey….You…You really didn’t need to.” His arm went around your shoulders and pulled you into his side, “I know I didn’t. But my girl gets what she wants.” A light pink blush spread across your cheeks at the comment, and you walked with him to the Vespa. “You can change on the ferry. Get on.”

Mickey glanced up as he heard you step out of the little room on the ferry in your dress. “Woooow…You look amazing.” He moved toward you, his arms circling your waist as he pulled you closer. A small smile pulled at your lips as you looked down, blushing. Mickey pulled your face to his and gently kissed you as you looked out over the water. You laid your head on his shoulder, watching the waves gently lick the edge of the ferry. Soon the boat came to a stop on the island and Mickey helped you down. “I’m going to set up, I’m paying for drinks tonight so go crazy.” He shot you a wink and kissed your hand as he walked to the DJ booth. It didn’t take long for you to get tipsy enough to lose yourself on the dance floor. Twirling, you weaved your way through the crowd. Eyes closed, you spun and moved your hips to the music, feeling the beat through your body. When you opened your eyes, you found that you had danced your way all the way to the booth in front of Mickey. He smiled and laughed down at you when he noticed you. You shrugged and continued dancing.

This was another party that lasted until after midnight, and again you fell asleep on Mickey’s lap on the ride back to Athens. When the ferry docked, Mickey gently shook you awake. “Hey, come on. You’re staying with me tonight.” You tried to protest, but you knew it would do no good. You settled behind him on the Vespa, your head resting against his back. He smiled feeling your warmth reaching around him.

[buckyscrystalqueen]

The Resistant Omega: Part 5

Pairings: Omega!Mickey Milkovich x Male Alpha!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, smut

Word Count: 3,506

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 /  Part 4

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hey Alpha…” Mickey cooed as he stood in your room, watching you hobble around a little awkwardly in just your new walking boot and a pair of boxer briefs. “What are you doing?”

“Get dressed.” You said as you grabbed a light blue, short sleeve button down, and a dark grey vest from your closet and tossed them over to the bed. “We’re going out.”

“Umm… no.” He said as he picked up your clothes to hang them up. “You just got your cast off…”

“Which is why we’re going out.” You said as you pulled the hangers out of his hands and tossed them back on the bed. “Get dressed, Mickey.” He sighed but didn’t move as you grabbed a nicer pair of jeans and a single sneaker and turned to get ready. You stopped in front of him and gave him a rough, chaste kiss, which simply made him huff at you.

“You’re gunna make me be the asshole here, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m just gunna leave you at home.” You looked up at him as you sat down on your bed and started to take off your boot so that you could get your jeans on and shook your head. “You can try your damnedest to fight it, Omega, but we’re going out. You can go kicking and screaming or willingly. I’m indifferent there. But we are going to have a good time.”

“Weren’t you the one just last night complaining about how your leg hurt?” He asked as he grabbed a black button down from the closet.

“That was yesterday.” He hummed at you and nodded, disbelievingly as he too grabbed a nicer pair of jeans you had bought him and a pair of Chuck Taylors and came over to get ready as well.

“So you have zero pain…”

“Omega!” You growled as you pulled your jeans down over your boot, harshly. “Drop it, damn it! I get it, you’re worried, but I am fine. We’re just gunna go and have a few drinks and just get out of this damn house for a couple hours. So stop worrying, get dressed, and let’s fucking go.” With a heavy eye roll, he pulled on his jeans and grabbed an undershirt from his drawer. He surprisingly stayed silent as you both finished getting ready and for the entire cab ride to the club, but the second he saw the bar you chose, he scowled.

“You think I’m goin’ to a fucking gay bar?” He asked as you paid and tipped the driver.

“You can do whatever the fuck you wanna do, Mick.” You said as you pushed open the door and got out of the car. “I’m going out for a drink.”

“You are such a fucking pain in the ass.” He grumbled as you headed straight to the door instead of stopping at the end of the line like the rest of the guys waiting to get it. With a nod to the bouncer, who was a long time friend, you walked through the red rope into the Fairy Tale. With every slightly limped step you took, the music rattled your bones in a way that you honestly missed but would get on your nerves within a couple hours for sure. You headed over to a section of leather couch that was open and sat down with a sigh as Mickey looked around with a slightly distasteful look and grabbed a seat next to you. 

“My baby!” A handsome, Beta waiter in a pair of tiny gold shorts named Tommy cooed as he sat down on the small stage in front of you. “Long time no see!”

“Been a little tied up.” You said as you pointed to your foot. “Car accident.”

“Well that was silly!” He giggled as he brushed his fingertips across your arm. “You shouldn’t do that! What can I get you?”

“Whiskey double, neat, and he’ll take a Miller lite.” Tommy nodded at you and shot you a wink as you handed him a twenty from your pocket and leaned back against the sofa.

“The fuck is that?” Mickey asked the moment he was out of ear shot.

“That was me ordering drinks…”

“And what, eye fucking the waiter is necessary?” You couldn’t help but laugh as you laid your arm on the back of the couch on top of his. You grabbed and held on to it faster than he could pull away and shook your head.

“Omega…”

“Don’t.” He barked under his breath as he glanced at a couple guys as they walked past.

“No, you don’t.” You snapped as you sat up a bit more and turned toward him. “Mickey, do you love me?” He sighed and rolled his eyes again.

“Shut up…”

“Do you?” You repeated as you put your other hand on his knee. “Baby boy… what are you doing to me right now, huh? Because if you’re not gunna act like my fucking partner, I’m sure there are dozens of twinks in here…” Your startled the slightest bit when he lunged across the small space and kissed you before pulling away nearly as quickly to search your eyes.

“Why do you fucking say that shit?” He nearly breathed as he subtly turned his arm under yours to have any sort of physical contact with you at that moment.

“Because what kind of Alpha would I be if I didn’t push you just a little bit out of your comfort zone to become the most true version of you that you could be?” You reached up and brushed your thumb across his jaw before letting your hand drop to your lap with a shake of your head. “Mickey, I have a lot of shit to dig through with you and I know if I don’t push you, we’re just gunna be holed up in my house for the rest of our lives. And excuse me for wanting the world to see my gorgeous, pain in my ass baby boy…”

“Fuck off.” He huffed with a small smirk as he turned toward the waiter to grab his drink. “Fuck you lookin’ at?”

“Ignore him.” You sighed as you grabbed your drink with a tight lipped smile before you pushed Tommy’s hand and your change away from you. “Keep it. Thanks.” Tommy nodded his head and pocketed his tip before almost literally skipping away to wait on someone else with an unfazed smile on his face. “You need to be nice.” You chuckled as you turned your attention to your Omega while you slowly brushed your thumb across the crook of his arm. “You’re the only man in here that gets to go home with me, remember that.”

“Yea, well the rest’a them better keep their hands and eyeballs to themselves up in this bitch.” He muttered before taking a long pull of his beer, which made you finally get to the point where you rolled your eyes.

“Such a hard ass, ‘mega.” You teased as you took a sip of your drink. “Can you relax for me, baby boy?”

“It’s not that fuckin’ easy.”

“I know.” You said with a nod as you scooted just a little bit closer to him and propped your boot up on the stage. “But you’ve already taken a huge step just coming in here. And I know no one in this fucker is gunna judge you for loving who you love. It’s the second best safe space in the world next to my house to be yourself.”

“You don’t get it, (Y/N).” He sighed as he bent his arm on the back of the couch to rub his jaw nervously. “You don’t fucking get it.”

“No, I could never completely get it.” You agreed as you rubbed his elbow with your thumb. “But I will be here all the fucking same. And I will love you no matter what anyone else in the world thinks. Because you are my Omega, Mickey. All mine.”

“I hate it when you get all weepy and sappy with your fucking rom-com bullshit…”

“Fuck off, you love it!” You laughed as you threw back your drink and looked around the bar.

“You think so.” He joked with a shit eating grin. “I honestly just throw up in my mouth.”

“I honestly feel like you’re just asking to get tied up to the bed so I can fuck the rude outta you again.” You could see the shiver race down his spine and your smile grew as you flagged down a waiter for another whiskey. “Yea, that’s what I thought.”

“Fuck, I hate when you do that shit, too.” He grumbled beside you as he shifted his seat beside you so that he was even closer to you and so that his starting erection was hidden while you ordered and paid for another round.

“I know you do, baby boy. But that’s why it is so much fun.”

——

“What? What?” You shouted when Mickey came running around the corner into the bathroom while you were getting ready for bed that night. He shook his head and barely made it to the toilet before he threw up violently. “Fuck. OK. OK, just get it out.” You cooed as you awkwardly got down on the floor beside him. You started to rub his back and startled again when you felt how hot he was. “Jesus, Mickey. You’re burning up.”

“Feel… death…” You nodded and kept rubbing his back as he started to throw up again. 

“Shit, baby boy… Just stay here for a second…”

“No, Alpha, please.” Mickey begged as he scrambled to try and grab your arm.

“Hey… I’m just gunna go grab my phone, Omega. That’s all. Just gunna call a doctor because I don’t know shit about being sick. I’m coming right back.” He let out a long whine and barely nodded his head before he was getting sick again, and you scrambled to your feet and down the hall to your room as fast as your booted foot would allow you to go.

“Fuck do you want? It’s three in the…”

“I need your Omega.” You snapped as you headed back into the bathroom. “Something’s wrong with Mickey.” You heard a slight scuffle through the speaker as you sat back down on the floor and started rubbing your Omega’s back again.

“(Y/N)?” Tara asked hesitantly. “What’s going on?”

“I don’t know. We went out to the Fairy Tale and he was fine, but when I was getting ready for bed, he came running in and started getting sick. He’s fucking burning up…”

“OK.” The doc said as calmly as she could. “Um… Is his heat due soon?”

“He’s on suppressants.” You said with a shake of your head as you pulled Mickey into your lap. “So no.”

“Oh, shit. Alright, I’m gunna come over and take a look at him. I need you to get him into a cold shower to try to bring the fever down because if he’s on suppressants and living with you, my first guess is this is his genetics fighting the chemicals he’s putting in his body. Advil and Tylenol won’t work here.”

“Doors locked, key’s in its usual spot. We’re in the upstairs bathroom. Alright, here, here, here.” You said quickly as you threw your phone across the room and helped Mickey off your lap to be sick again. “I’m gunna fix this baby boy. I swear.”

“Alpha.” He groaned as you yanked on your boot cover.

“I know, baby. Come here, let’s stand up for a minute.” You were glad you were stronger than he was because he was completely dead weight when you went to get him in the shower to cool him down. You lowered him down to the floor in your lap and cradled him in your arms as he curled into your chest.

“Alpha… everything hurts.”

“I know, sweetheart.” You breathed as you pulled off the wife beater he slept in and tossed it in the corner of the shower stall. “Tara’s gunna come and make it all better, I promise.” With a nod of his head, he lurched forward and got sick all over your arm, side, and leg, and you simply nodded and kept rubbing his back. “Just let it out, baby boy. Let it all out.” He nodded his head and fell into your chest again as you pushed the hose of the shower up and quickly caught the shower head before it hit the pair of you. 

You washed your side off and did everything you could to cool your boyfriend off, but with every passing moment, you got a little more frantic because the cold water wasn’t working. Every single pathetic whine he made ripped through your heart like a knife, and you had to admit that you were grateful when he passed out even if it did scare you even more. Your heart started to race in your chest when Mickey started to shake, and you looked up at Tara and Jax desperately when they finally stepped into your bathroom.

“Help him.” You practically begged as you moved the shower head out of the way.

“Jax, take him…”

“No!” You snarled as you quickly curled your body around your Omega when Tara turned off the shower so she and her Alpha wouldn’t get wet. Jax took one look at your nearly feral glare and quickly pulled Tara behind his back and away from you, protectively.

“(Y/N)… I’m not gunna take him anywhere.” Jax said evenly as he crouched down in front of you so he came off less threatening to your Omega. “I’m going to carry him to your room so that Tara can take care of him. She can’t do that in the shower and you can’t carry him with your foot.” You searched his eyes for a moment before letting your legs slide out a little straighter. “Tara, grab towels and lay them out…”

“On my side.” You growled as you pushed yourself up. “Left side of the bed.” She nodded her head and scrambled to get the towels laid out as you grabbed one for yourself from the shelf. You tossed your wet boxers back in the shower and threw on a pair of gym shorts from your dresser before grabbing a clean pair of boxers and a pair of shorts for Mickey. You barely heard Tara tell Jax what she needed him to get for her from wherever he could as you climbed up on the bed beside the love of your life.

“Here, let me help.” Tara said softly as you used your towel to try to dry Mickey off before you got him dressed.

“Is he gunna be OK?”

“I’m gunna do everything I can. But he’ll need you more than anything I can give him.” You nodded your head, absentmindedly and covered his lap with a towel to change his boxers.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

——

Guilt was not a feeling you were really familiar with. You didn’t feel it when you stole, or when you murdered. You didn’t feel it when you beat that one punk within an inch of life for scratching your truck, nor when you broke your first heart or every heart after that. But the guilt of listening to your Omega whine in his sleep because of those fucking suppressants he was on that you gave him and allowed him to continue taking was absolutely killing you. You wanted so badly to take the pain of his twisted, half heat away, to claim it as your own so he didn’t have to live through it for another minute more.

“Alpha…” Mickey’s pain filled voice shook you out of your angered thoughts and you lurched down the bed to lay down in front of him.

“I’m here, baby boy.” You cooed as you gently laid your hand on his hot cheek and smiled weakly at his gorgeous blue eyes.

“M’cold.”

“OK, I can fix that.” You quickly rolled onto your back and grabbed the remotes to the two stand alone fans Daryl had brought over for you to try to keep Mickey’s core temp down. You turned the fans down to a lower setting and quickly grabbed the blankets you had stacked up on the far side of the bed in case he got cold. “Here we go. Get you nice and toasty warm.”

“I’m sorry.”

“What the fuck would you be sorry for, Omega?” You huffed as you tucked the blankets in behind his back.

“Threw up… on your leg.” You couldn’t help but smile as you pulled him into your chest and started rubbing his back to get him warmed up, despite the fact that he still felt fire hot.

“Yea, well I’ll look the other way this time, ‘mega. Just this once. Just remember, I still owe you a broken nose.” A small smile stretched across his face as he buried his face in your throat and breathed deeply.

“Hope I don’t die first.”

“You’re not gunna die, Omega. We’re both gunna lay right here all week long, and we’re gunna suffer through this together same way you suffered with me through my leg. We are in this together, Omega. You and me.” He purred at the thought and snuggled even closer to you.

“Fuck… why do you smell so good?” He asked as he turned his nose more into your neck and inhaled deeply.

“Easy, Omega. Doc said you can’t get all worked up.”

“M’not.”

“Mmhmm.” You countered with a nod as you tilted your jaw the slightest bit to give him a little more room. Your jaw dropped a half an inch when he nipped at your throat, and a low growl rolled from your chest. “Omega…” You actually jumped when he ripped away from you and scrambled to try to get out of the blankets, and you had less than a second to spare to grab the trash can for him to get sick in when he couldn’t get the blankets free. “Shit, baby boy. You can’t get worked up this heat. Those fucking suppressants are seriously fucking with you…”

“Fuck…” He groaned as he tried to push the blankets off his feet. “Fuck this shit…”

“We’re gunna make it through this, baby boy. I promise.” You said as you turned the fans back up because he had started to sweat again.

“Just fucking kill me.” He mumbled as he set the trash can down and fell back against the headboard.

“We’re gunna make it through this.” You breathed as you got up to grab him a pain killer and clean out the trash can. “Take this and smoke a joint. We’re gunna make it through this shit and then we’re having a serious fucking talk about those pills.”

[giogio-gucci-gangstar]

JoJo’s Disney Adventure!

Thank you @lostinthe-jojos for this request for the raffle! It was SO fun to write, and I loved having Joseph go to Disney (I go all the time and think he would absolutely love it) 

Summary: You and Joseph go to The Magic Kingdom at Disney World! JoJo is basically an oversized toddler and gets distracted by absolutley everything, but you two finally make it on your favorite ride (Splash Mountain) and things take a wet turn.

You looked up and saw Joseph giggling madly as the Mickey shaped confetti rained down around you two. After waking up at an ungodly hour and taking the Monorail to the park, The Magic Kingdom was finally open! 

The way his smile spread from ear to ear, somehow bigger than the toddler’s next to him, warmed your heart. It was worth standing in line so early just to see him like this. You gently reached up to dust a few of the sparkles out of his hair. But the sweet moment ended all too quickly as Joseph grabbed your hand and hurtled through the crowd into the park.

 Holding your hand with an iron grip, he started pushing past people, small and medium sized children not excluded. You tried to spare a look back, to make sure he hadn't actually pushed children to the ground, but you were scared to face the reality of this particular situation. Thanks to his reckless disregard for everyone else around, you two were some of the first people in the park. 

Joseph stopped and spun around trying to take in all of Main Street at once. “OH MY GOD! Look there’s a horse drawn carriage! A trolly! THE CASTLE!!!” Joseph was tugging you around, pulling you in each direction to every little detail, each more exciting than the last. Suffice to say the man was thrilled and you couldn’t help but smile at how happy he was. He truly was like a child, actually that wasn't quite accurate, you were pretty sure he was more excited than any child around you. 

“Come on! Let’s get some ears first!” You called up to him, just to make sure you didn't squander your day away looking at the park rather than actually being in it. Before you actually got to the park for the opening, you had thought you were the most excited for this vacation. But you were proven wrong very quickly. No one’s excitement could compare to Joseh’s. 

“Great idea!” He nearly shouted and pulled you into the little hat shop. Apparently the man had been looking over maps of the park before you two got there. Honestly you were very impressed, he didn't usually have this sort of dedication or attention span. 

You didn’t think it was possible, but his eyes were blown even wider as he took in all the possible choices for his very first pair of Mickey ears. 

“OH! Look at this one!” He pulled a Snow White themed pair of the rack and tried them on in front of a mirror. He scowled a bit and went on to his next choice: a pair of Elsa themed ears. This time he stuck a pose in front of the mirror, earning some odd looks from the couple wearing newlywed pins behind him. You supposed it wasnt everyday that you came across a 195 cm man wearing a crop top. Aside from just his stature, he sure warranted a stare when he tried on a “Just Married” pair of bridal ears. 

“Look at how it swishes!” JoJo was frantically waving his head side to side, watching as the veil trailed past him. You could put up with a lot of his shenanigans but you were pretty sure he was just doing it to piss off the couple behind you… 

“Joseph!! Come on, put those back, why don't you try these?” You pulled out a classic pair of ears, “Look, you can even get these monogrammed!” You held out the pair to him but his eyes were glued to another pair. Oh no. 

He reached up and grabbed a pair of bedazzled rose gold ears. He was awestruck as he slowly placed them on top of his head. You were pretty sure he was imagining an elaborate coronation service for himself in his head. Or at least that was what his expression looked like. 

“Okay those are cute!” You were literally fine with any pair he got, you just wanted to go on some rides before the lines got terribly long. 

“Okay okay, we'll take two of these!” he walked up to the cashier and very happily made his purchase. “Why two?” You giggled. You wouldn't have put it past him to buy an extra pair for himself...

“Well one is for you silly, they match your eyes,” He leaned down and coed in your ear. You weren't sure if it was cute or cheesy so you gave him a light shove and put them on. Now you were one of those annoying matching couples, but you supposed you could make this fun. 

Okay, now that you were finally outside of literally the very first shop in the park, your next task today was to get a photo in front of Cinderella’s Castle. Joseph was not satisfied with a single picture, so he made sure to strike a pose in some of his favorite looks.  

“Okay,” the photographer pointed to you, “hold your hands out in a little cup…” you did as you were told though you were a bit confused. Luckily Joseph had no hesitation asking. 

 “What’s that for?” His face was scrunched with confusion. 

 “Well we’re going to digitally insert Tinkerbelle in her hands-“ 

Joseph swatted your hands down, “Put her in mine!” You elbowed him a little, but his little pout was so genuine and he was so excited you couldn’t really stay mad. So you settled for a small eye roll. 

Alright now that photos were done you could head to the first ride on your list, Splash Mountain. But that idea was quickly derailed when Joseph noticed a concession stand. And my god this boy could eat. You sighed a little, just wanting to go on some rides, but you couldn't deny that those mickey pretzels smelled divine...

“Okay so I want two Mickey pretzels, three churros, a souvenir bucket of popcorn, aaaand two American cokes!” He has spent nearly 40$ on these little treats but damn they were good. 

You munched on your own pretzel as you walked around the castle, hopefully to your ride. But just as you were ready for a taste of a churro you noticed they had somehow disappeared. And that JoJo’s face was covered in cinnamon sugar… 

“JoJo did you eat all of the churros?!” It had been probably four minutes since you two had gotten your snacks.

“Mmm no I think one of those ducks stole it!” He pointed into the moat around the castle to a suspiciously inauspicious duck. You glared at him but there was plenty of time for snacks later. And later happened to be right now. 

“Is that a FUNNEL CAKE STAND?!” Joseph tugged you so hard some popcorn flew out of his princess themed bucket. But that funnel cake smelled delightful, so it wasn't hard for him to convince you that this was a necessary part of your trip. So you waited in an outrageously long line, luckily it was very easy to pass the time with Joseph. 

“I spy with my little eye, something tan and caramelly.” His nose was pointed in the air, a look of ecstasy spread across his face.

“Is it the funnel cake that person just got?” You pointed to the woman a few people in front of you. Joseph was literally drooling at the site of it. 

“How did you know?!” Somehow he managed to look actually confused.

“JoJo YOU'VE been staring at them as they go by for the past ten minutes.” He pouted a bit and somehow his stomach grumbled. How could he possibly still be hungry?! 

 Finally you two made it to the ordering booth, and he asked for two funnel cakes. You figured they were probably mostly for him, but this time you would definitely snag a few bites for yourself. JoJo speedwalked to a table, balancing a funnel cake in each hand.

“JoJo you have to share this time!” And you attacked with your fork before he could do anything but gape at you with a look of utter betrayal. 

“That isn’t sharing, you’re STEALING!” His eyes were blown wide with betrayal.

“JoJo! You look just like that kid over there in the stroller!” You laughed as they both shared a scrunched up, red face. Though it looked like the boy was more upset about being buckled into a stroller rather than having to share a cake. 

Somehow you managed to negotiate about a quarter of one cake, and that had been enough to satisfy your sweet tooth. So Joseph ever so kindly offered to finish the rest of yours. 

At this point of your food coma, Splash Mountain was looking a little daunting... Maybe you should just do that Haunted Mansion next. It was basically around the corner from you two. You turned to Joseph but he was bent over a little listening to his stomach grumble… As Joseph stood up you heard his stomach gurgle again. And his face was looking slightly green. Oh no, his stomach hadn’t been growling, he was getting sick. 

 “Wait JoJo,” you quickly stood up and moved behind him. Obviously to comfort him, and not just to get out of projectile vomit range. If that was going to happen. 

“Are you feeling alright?” You were a little worried he seemed to be having some issues standing up. “Oh for sure. Perfectly fine. Now let’s go get wet!” You were pretty sure going on a ride where you plunged 60 feet down a waterfall was an awful idea with him in this state. 

“JoJo you look really pale…” you looked around frantically, “Why don’t we go to The Hall of Presidents? It’s cold and dark and a great place to sit down!” 

 “Sure that sounds great,” he sounded relieved but quickly covered his slip up, “because it’s really hot and I don’t want you to get burned.” You giggled. Sure it was definitely because it was hot, and not because he had eaten so much junk food his stomach was violently protesting. 

 As soon as his tight butt hit the seat he leaned back and kicked his legs up, noticeably sighing. As soon as the George Washington animatronic started speaking, Joseph was already snoring. You snickered to yourself, he was like an oversized toddler. Buuut a cuddly one, so you snuggled in close. 

 Apparently you had fallen asleep too, because you were jolted awake as Joseph screamed, “WHY IS ABRAHAM LINCOLN MELTING?!” You were pretty sure your heart was beating out of your chest, not because of the weird animatronic, but because your boyfriend has pretty much thrown you out of your chair in his moment of panic. 

 He looked at you in terror, but pulled you up and ran out of the theater before more judging soccer moms could glare at him for interrupting their educational show.

“Oh my god! What was that?!” He was bent over gasping from shock. Still. 

You were laughing so hard at him you could barely speak, “that- was the Hall of Presidents!” You bent over to his level laughing still. 

“Why would they do something like that? It was TERRIFYING!” 

“JoJo this is America. They like presidents even if they're old and wrinkly.” He was certain that the show was a plot to scare children into submission, and despite your best efforts you could not convince him otherwise.

“Okay let’s go on Splash Mountain now!” Joseph was quickly trying to change the subject. Apparently all his stomach needed to feel better was a little 16 president nap. 

“It does look like you’re a bit hot anyway.” You threw him a little wink and your hint was not lost on him. He held your waist and pulled you against him on the walk there. It actually was very hot and standing so close against him was getting a little sweaty, but you wouldn’t ever want to let go. 

Oddly enough this time he was busy pointing out all of the odd wildlife that seemed to infiltrate the park. Everything from ducks to egrets, turtles to lizards. Joseph was excited about them all. You had to repeatedly pull him back on track to get to the ride. But once you finally saw the waterfall leading down into a pit of pretend thorns, you felt your gut drop with excitement. And JoJo’s expression wasn't that different, a glint of excitement and danger danced in his eye. 

Despite your many detours, the line was still pretty short because most people don't want to go on thrill rides at 9:30 in the morning. So you two got on pretty fast. 

“Please keep all hands, arms, feet, and legs inside the vehicle at all times. Please stow away any sunglasses, hats, and ears in the netting below.” The recorded voice played and you promptly tucked your ears away under the seat. 

“JoJo you have to take those off.” You gently nudged him but he pretended not to hear you. “JoJo…” you asked exasperatedly. 

“Oh come on they're not gonna fall off! Plus I want to look cute in the picture!!” You laughed at him, of course that was his reasoning. You were about to tell him he looked cute in every picture, but the ride started before you could.

It was a little long, and every small hill made you nearly jump and hold onto Joseph. You were just a little scared, just like a smidge, of the big hill. And then it came. You were paused at the precipice of the mountain, looking down at the monumental drop and you clung to Joseph’s arm so tightly he gave you a teasing look and let out a loud howl as you started to fall. 

You had your eyes scrunched closed but you felt Joseph lurch back but not even that could get you to open them. Only when you were slammed with a wave of freezing water could you open them. 

You gasped as the water seeped through all of your clothes. Not leaving a centimeter of clothing dry. You sat there like a wet fish, and turned to Joseph to see he was perfectly dry. How the hell did it just get you? 

Joseph finally heard your teeth chattering and wrapped an arm around you as you two walked to go see the photo taken on the ride. You were ducking into Joseph’s lap, and he was aggressively leaning backwards reaching for his ears that had flown off. 

“I TOLD you they would fly off!” You scolded him a bit, but from the frown on his face you knew he was already pretty upset. 

“And I told you you should wear a white shirt today.” He countered and that cheeky grin on him was absurd. 

“Oh shut up you pervert!” you shoved him a little, though you immediately missed his body heat. 

“It was a joke, I swear!,” He pulled you closer to him, “But I wouldn’t have minded getting a little peek…” 

“Just stop talking and hug me, I'm freezing.” You rolled your eyes but snuggled in close to your cheeky bastard of a boyfriend. 

[shewhowantsmouseears]

Disney Storybits : Mickeytaro & The Proposing Plan

Another addition to my "Mickey-taro" idea that I did before! To repeat, it's a take on the Japanese tale of Momotaro/Peach Boy. Mickey is no bigger than a peach bit, and is on a journey to get the Lucky Hammer, a magical item that can make anyone and anything any size! Along the way he befriends Horace and Panchito who want to aide him on his quest. Things get complicated when the hammer is in the possession of the beautiful Princess Minnie, who refuses to give its location.

In this storybit, Panchito thinks he may have found a way around that little problem.

Panchito Pistoles was not a braggart, and was often called a humble man. Whenever he did brag, it was almost always about his friends, preferring to highlight the amazing things they'd done. But tonight was a little different – tonight he thought he was rather brilliant, and in the future he planned to tell everyone the story of this success. So far his plan had gone off without a hitch.

Step one, convince the princess.

“Mickey wants to speak to me in private?” Minnie had repeated the request, confused. “What do you mean? He can talk to me anytime he wants. He's a dear friend, you all are.” This conversation had taken place half an hour ago, and her highness had been on her way to her bedroom. As a result she had started to undo some of the pins and ribbons in her long, lovely black hair.

“No no, good lady, this is a very private talk he wants to have.” Panchito lowered his voice to a whisper, hoping to make her understand quickly before he was caught. “Mickey has some special things he wishes to tell you.”

She'd yet to wash off the layers of make-up on her face, yet it was easy to tell the difference between the blush that was from powder, and the blush that came naturally. Minnie reddened and reddened more with every passing second. “Oh, my.” She finally said, eyes cast down demurely. “W-well...I suppose it would be rude to deny him such a request.”

“¡Excelente!” Panchito clapped his hands together. “He'll be waiting for you in the gardens in a half hour! Don't keep him waiting!” Although he doubted she would, judging by that shy yet eager smile on her dainty lips. With the step completed, Panchito suddenly raced off to complete the next one.

Step two, distract the lady-in-waiting.

“I don't see why I gotta do this.” Horace had huffed, crossing his arms and leaning on the hallway wall.  This conversation had taken place ten minutes ago, and with every wasted minute Horace was unknowingly threatening to destroy the entire scheme. “Why can't you do it? She's a mean one, that Clarabelle! She's not gunna wanna be seen with me!”

“Oh please,” Panchito interrupted, trying to keep his cool. “I've seen the way she looks at you. It has to be you! Otherwise she'll find out where Minnie is, and the whole thing will be ruined! Don't you care about Mickey's happiness?”

Horace rolled his eyes, but sighed heavily. “Of course I do.”

“And don't you want him to get the Lucky Hammer?”

“Of course I do-”

“Then you find Clarabelle and keep her distracted as long as possible! For the sake of our friend Mickey! ¡Vamonos!” For extra emphasis, Panchito gave a kick to Horace's leg, and the disgruntled horse trotted down the hall to find the equally disgruntled servant. Horace was stubborn, but like Panchito, he'd give anything for Mickey's wish to come true.

Which left step three, which was telling Mickey, which he'd done five minutes ago.

“A plan to get the Lucky Hammer?” Mickey was intrigued but also wary. “Aw c'mon, Panchito, you heard the princess! She can't tell any of us where it is until the Demon King is defeated. No way, no how.”

“Yes way, yes how!” Panchito used his hand so Mickey could hop off of the window he'd been cleaning and ride on to the floor. “Trust me, Mickey, if this works – and it will work! - you will have that hammer in no time! And then you will be normal sized, and your Papa will love you, and all will be well! Just do everything I say, and there's no way you can lose!”

It didn't take long to convince Mickey, who had dreamed of being bigger than a peach pit for all his life. He supposed even if this plan, whatever it was, didn't work out then there would be no harm done. Besides, he enjoyed spending time with Princess Minnie. She was easy to talk to, always keen to hear his stories, and had a heart bigger than any regular-sized person's. He entertained the notion of having feelings for her, but tried to reject that thought soon after – not only was he a mere commoner, but what woman in her right mind would want to have a lover who fit in the palm of her hand? She deserved better.

And so Mickey went to the gardens, although he wondered why Panchito had said to “do everything” as he said if he was going to run away at the last minute. He dismissed it as another one of Panchito's overenthusiastic oddities and walked into the tall grass. Mickey wasn't sure where exactly she wanted to meet up, as a simple garden for her was an entire landscape for him, but as he walked deeper in he found a familiar clearing – the same spot where he first met Princess Minnie. But now it was covered in a thick, silk blanket, a golden candle-holder in the middle holding up two flickering red candles. Petals of various colors had been strewn about.

Mickey was immediately suspicious.

“Oh my goodness. Did you do all this?” came the sweet voice of the princess, who was now walking into sight. Instead of washing off her make-up and undoing her hair as she was supposed to before going to bed, she'd added on even more touches to her face and her hair was tied up in even more elegant curls. It was as if instead of donning the look a princess should have, she'd gone the extra mile to make sure she was looking as beautiful as she could make herself. She'd made an effort – which made Mickey's heart jump into his throat, until he realized what it was she'd asked.

“Uh,” Mickey struggled in his throat, looking around. “I guess? In a way?” This had to be Panchito's doing, but what the rooster was doing, Mickey couldn't guess.

“It's lovely.” Minnie smiled, sitting down on her knees and smoothing down her flowing robes, this one white with a pattern of red roses stitched on, creating the illusion that the petals were fluttering with every move she made. “I hope you didn't go to too much trouble.”

“It wasn't any trouble at all.” Literally. What was he getting into? “That's, uh, that's a nice kimono you got on. Ain't seen it before.”

“It's for special occasions,” Minnie replied, her eyes timidly turning away for a moment, hiding her lips behind her sleeve. Mickey's mind reeled - special occasion? Why was this a special occasion? Weren't they just there to talk? “I...I was told you have some special things you wanted to tell me.”

“Uhhh.” Mickey stretched the word out as long as he could, trying to decipher whatever was being presented to him. As his eyes bounced all over, he noticed a rustling in a nearby cherry blossom tree. At first, worry seized his body, and he made a motion to grab the needle of a sword on his belt – was it one of the Demon King's minions?

Nope – it was Panchito, who now hung upside down from one the branches, holding up a long piece of paper with hastily written words. Say “you're so beautiful!”

Mickey blinked rapidly in honest confusion. “You're...so beautiful?” He said out loud, and it took him half a second to realize what he'd actually said and who he'd actually said it to.

Minnie giggled, oblivious to what was happening in the tree or the panic flowing through Mickey's head. “You're always so sweet, Mickey. I've had so many people give me compliments, but it's... just different coming from you. Like you see me as Minnie, and not just the princess.”

“Oh. Well. Um.” Mickey fumbled, trying not to watch Panchito write something else on a new layer of paper. “I think we'd be friends even if you weren't the princess. You've always been real nice to me.” Okay, so they were complimenting each other. It was nice, but how was this going to get the Lucky Hammer? Minnie wasn't going to reveal its location over idle flattery.

… Right?

“I feel the same way!” Minnie chirped, her enthusiasm growing while she lost some of her proper royal demeanor. “Size, titles, none of it matters. The friendship we have is so much stronger than that. You always know how to cheer me up, and make me feel like a real person.”

Did he really have such an influence over her? Mickey momentarily pushed aside the thoughts of the hammer, more than happy to indulge in this time of sweetness. “I only give as good as I get, Princess! You make me feel teen feet tall! Everyone else always takes pity on me or tries to do things they think I can't do. But you let me try stuff. You let me...” Panchito was finished writing. “Um... You let me...”

Minnie waited patiently for him to finish the sentence, but Panchito had gone on a different tangent. Say “I want to be with you!”

Be with her? But he was with her already, they were right there, talking and -

And then the entire idea of the plan hit Mickey with the force of an exploding mountain. THIS was the plan to get the hammer?! He was supposed to – supposed to – seduce the princess?! Was Panchito out of his mind?!

“Mickey?” Minnie asked gently, lowering her head slightly to get a better look at her companion. “Is everything all right?” The revelation of Panchito's plan had caused Mickey's entire face to go as red as the roses on Minnie's kimono, and his tiny body trembled with great force.

“No!” Mickey shouted, intending to tell Panchito before correcting himself. “I mean, yes! I mean, that is, uh, I, um...” He wanted to make plans to kill the rooster in his sleep, but this matter had to be resolved first. “I don't know what I was thinking.” He struggled to make his voice stern, hoping that he'd make himself clear to Panchito, who was now pointing at the same words over and over in an attempt to make Mickey say them. “I must have been thinking something crazy. I must have hit my head. I was thinking about things that would never, ever happen in a million years.” He finished with a curt glare to Panchito. The rooster stuck his tongue out.

Minnie's body sunk with every negative thought, oblivious to the plan being made and defied all around her. Had Mickey been paying better attention, he might have picked up that Minnie thought of him just as fondly as he thought of her – perhaps even more. It was why Panchito had been so confident of the entire idea in the first place – he'd noticed the wistful gazes Minnie had whenever she looked upon Mickey, the sheer delight in her voice whenever she spoke of him, and the daily excuses she thought up so she could spend more time at his side. But being a princess, and a lady, it was only appropriate for the man to make the first move, so to speak.

Which wasn't all that helpful when the man in question had a mixture of self-loathing and obliviousness.

So in this moment when Minnie believed Mickey was giving up on telling her how he truly felt about her – which was what she had desperately hoped was the special thing he wanted to say – her heart felt as it'd begun to rip in two. Yet one of the things that had won Mickey over was that she didn't take things laying down. She fought, as she fought now. “I want to hear it!”

“Huh?” Mickey had been so caught up in telling Panchito off he'd forgotten Minnie was part of this. “Hear what?”

“I want to hear what you were thinking.” Minnie placed her palms on the ground, lowering her head as much as her body was able. “I promise you, I'll listen to everything you have to say. You can trust me! Can't you?”

“O-Of course I can trust you!” Mickey stuttered, but to his relief Panchito appeared to have given up on that one train of thought, as he'd tossed the paper aside and was writing something else. “Princess, I'd trust you with anythin'! But, well, there's just...somethin' weird goin' on, and...” Panchito was finished. Maybe, Mickey prayed, this was something far more reasonable.

Say “I love you!”

Panchito was a dead man. “...And some people have rocks for brains.”

“Mickey, please don't say that about yourself!” Minnie cupped her hands, which was the usual signal that meant Mickey was allowed to walk onto them.

“I wasn't.” Mickey muttered under his breath, seeing Panchito now writing something else.

“You're not dumb at all!” Minnie insisted, lifting Mickey up so they were closer together. “You've always been very clever! You always find your own way to fix things! I'd say you're smarter than every man in Japan put together!”

Mickey would have been immensely flattered by such words, but Panchito kept distracting him. Now the rooster was flinging several papers in a row, each suggestion worst than the last. Mickey could only hope his eyes were getting the message across.

Say “I wish I could take you into my arms!”

No!

Say “I wish I could kiss you lips!”

NO!

Say “I wish I could be at your side forever!”

PANCHITO PISTOLES FOR THE LOVE OF -

“I wish you could be at my side forever.”

“I AIN'T SAYIN' – what?” Hold on a second, that last one had been said out loud. Mickey abruptly paused, looking back at Minnie's face. His ears were big for his body, little for anyone else's, but they worked very well. He was certain she'd said something.

“If your father won't accept you,” Minnie was saying, her voice now as soft as the evening wind, one of the ribbons coming undone in her hair. “And you can't go back home...You...you can stay here forever, with me.” She wished she could hide as she said this, but if Mickey wasn't going to make any moves, then it was up to her, no matter how embarrassing it got. “I know your size makes you so unhappy...but I'll do all in my power, every single day, to make you happy. I'll make up for all the happiness you ever deserved in life, and for the rest of our lives. If you'd allow me...I want to take care of you.” She closed her eyes, as if worn out by expressing her deepest desires.

Mickey was tempted to pinch his arm to see if this was a dream, but he convinced himself that if this was a dream, Panchito wouldn't have been it, especially not obnoxiously giving two thumbs up. Mickey's heart pounded in his chest, a hard drumming that he would've believed the entire kingdom could hear. There was no way Panchito's ridiculous idea had worked – so, somehow, someway, he must have stolen her heart before this night happened. How he did it, Mickey couldn't fathom or guess. Around Minnie he was simply Mickey – nothing more and nothing less.

And to be honest, he hadn't a clue about his future. He had refused to go home until he was of normal size, and if he wouldn't ever be normal sized, then where was he to go until the end of his days? A lump formed in Mickey's throat. He missed his parents deeply – but he also loved Minnie deeply. The offer was more than tempting. He couldn't possibly give her what she deserved, yet she didn't care. It was a strange sort of happy mindboggling.

If he had nothing to lose anymore, then, well, why not?

“I like you.” Mickey blurted out, and regretted it only because of how childish it sounded. One didn't answer a potential marriage proposal with “like”. It was just the first words that popped into his head and had the power to leave his mouth. “I like you a lot.” As if that was any better! Then again, it wasn't as if he'd ever practiced or rehearsed for such a moment, since said moment had always bordered on the impossible in his mind. “You don't really...have to worry about all that happiness stuff. I'm happy enough when we're...together, y'know? Just being around you makes everything all better. So, you just be you, and I'll just be me. Like we've always done.”

It wasn't a wholly definitive answer, but they were both still young, and Minnie accepted he would need time to think it over. For now, she was greatly pleased by what she had heard. She lifted her hands up and kissed Mickey atop his head – it couldn't be said if her lips had knocked him over, or if Mickey was so struck with lovesick stupor that he fell onto his back. Either way, Minnie giggled, and Panchito believed his plan to be a surefire success.

And, for the record, Horace and Clarabelle had a very nice time together as well.

[junker-town]

I went to Disney on Ice and witnessed the evolution of the Disney Princess

I also maybe cried.

BROOKLYN — A tiny princess is wailing inside a giant plastic teacup. Her mother leans against it with one arm akimbo, mirroring the handle, and beams into the camera. The photographer waves a rattle behind the lens in a futile attempt to coax a smile out of the miserable toddler.

Zoom out, and you’ll see a sea of miniature royals, all pale pinks, blues, and yellows. Disney On Ice’s Dare to Dream show is about to start, and Barclay’s Center is packed for 11 a.m. on a Thursday. The entire pre- and elementary-school age population of New York seems to have skipped school to “celebrate what’s possible as five Disney heroines spark the courage inside us all.” Disney tells us we’re here “to find our inner hero.”

My seat is next to a woman named Tyra Brooks and her daughter Sanaa. It’s Sanaa’s third birthday, so Brooks and her husband, who live in Brooklyn, took the day off work to be here. Sanaa is obsessed with Moana, the lead character from the movie by the same name. On my other side sit Stacy Cruz, 27, and her little brother Wyatt, 9, who’s been begging to go to the show since he saw ads for it on TV. Cruz monitored tickets until she found these, which, at $15, she could afford. Wyatt skipped school in Manhattan, and Cruz took the day off from her two jobs nannying and working in retail. In front of me, Natalie Nunez from Queens and her daughters Melinda and Evelyn, who are four and nine, cheer as the lights dim.

Our master of ceremonies is a relentlessly positive woman on skates in a purple figure-skating dress and a blazer. She seems adamant that nothing has ever gone wrong that can't be made right. Happily Ever After is a destination, and this woman is on a mission to make sure we all end up there.

She announces Minnie and Mickey, and the place erupts. These kids scream for the two famous mice the way teens would react to Harry Styles, or whoever the Cool Teen Celebrity Du Jour is. Melinda, the four-year-old ballerina in front of me, grips the armrests of her seat, sways her torso back and forth, and shakes her head so violently that I think there’s a chance she’ll launch herself out of her chair.

Minnie and Mickey leave, and the Beauty and the Beast segment of the show begins. Gaston, the blow-hard who always made me uncomfortable as a child, shows up. He declares himself a handsome hero. None of these kids give a shit about him, but they go nuts when Belle glides out onto the ice holding a book.

You know the rest of the story; at the end, Gaston falls off the set in dramatic fashion, the Beast takes off his Beast costume under a cloud of dry ice and turns into a handsome man, and Belle finds true love. She closes her books and glides around with her prince to a love song that sounds like a Belinda Carlisle B-side and definitely wasn’t in the original movie.

The kids get a real kick out of the lifts and spins that these skaters are doing. Most of the performers were professional figure skaters; some Disney On Ice dancers have been Olympians. The actual athleticism on display here is impressive, beautiful.

Charlotte Wilder with a shakily-held iPhone

Cinderella’s story begins. She does her thing, and eventually the clock strikes 12. She skates away, thanks to the arbitrary curfew her asshole Fairy Godmother set. Our friendly MC — who’s been hovering at the edge of the rink while interjecting life lessons throughout the show — skates around to see if the glass slipper fits any little girls in the front row. It doesn’t. It also doesn’t fit the Ugly Stepsisters.

Did you know that in the Grimms’ Brother’s version, the Stepsisters cut off their heels so the shoe would fit? My mom used to read me the original fairy tales, peeling back the layer of frosting with which Disney coats these mostly-terrible stories. I loved them. They terrified me, but I was fascinated by the vivid descriptions, like the ones of the sisters’ mutilated feet bleeding all over the glass shoe. I couldn’t believe women would hurt themselves like that to be beautiful or loved. Or both.

Cinderella gets her prince. They dance around to another song that sounds a little bit like off-brand Tina Turner.

“No matter how mean, mean, mean everyone was, she was able to rise above bullying and bickering to be kind and hopeful,” says our MC. “She found her happily ever after, plus a cute new pair of shoes.”

“That’s bullshit!” I want to yell to the children around me. “Don’t just roll over when someone’s a dick! Stand up for yourselves! Buy your own shoes!” But I stay quiet.

We move on to Rapunzel from Tangled, a movie that came out after my childhood and which I haven’t seen. Rapunzel is still pretty damsel-in-distress-y, but she does whack a dude on the head with a frying pan in the first scene, which the kids (and I) get a total kick out of. There's also a horse comprised of two people — one for the front legs and one for the back legs. I’m not sure how they can see anything.

“There's a horse with two people and it's working?” Cruz marvels beside me. “Pretty cool.”

Rapunzel is sassier than Belle and Cinderella, but the story still ends with her skating off into the sunset with a prince.

It’s intermission. I leave my seat and pass a guy hawking lemonade and sno-cones instead of the usual beers Barclay’s sells. The floor is sticky with various forms of spilled sugar. I wait in line behind tens of princesses to use the bathroom, then go buy some cotton candy. The man asks if I want one with or without a crown. I say with, but it’s too small to fit my head, so I go back to my seat and give it to Melinda. It falls over her eyes and she giggles. Her mom takes it and puts it on.

Someone starts a chant — Elsa! Elsa! Elsa! — as the lights go down, and, indeed, here comes Elsa from Frozen. I haven’t seen this movie either (I should babysit more, or, like, have a child if I want to stay up to date), but I think the gist is that Elsa’s pissed at her sister for wanting to marry someone she’s only known for one day. In retaliation, Elsa turns all of Norway or wherever into a hellish winterscape using her magical powers. Then disappears and her sister has to find her.

It’s finally time for “Let It Go”, the hit song from Frozen which I somehow know all the words to. The crowd of children is singing along almost louder than Elsa is through her mic. Melinda and even little three-year-old Sanaa beside me know all the words.

Let it go, let it go That perfect girl is gone Here I stand!

Frozen’s abridged version ends and the MC spews a message about how truly loving someone means sacrificing everything you have for them, which, I mean, let’s all relax here, okay? Then Moana skates onto the stage and the screaming is more intense than it’s been for the whole show. I haven’t seen Moana either, but Google tells me it’s about a Polynesian girl whose grandmother has tasked her with saving her island and finding herself. The kids sing along to every word and dance in their seats. They — okay, I — take particular delight in a massive, sprawling crab with a sparkly shell whose costume seems impossible to skate in.

Charlotte Wilder

Sorry this picture is so shitty, but it was the best I could do

We meet a dude named Maui, who is not Moana’s love interest. I don’t think she has one, as far as I can tell. She’s just a determined girl who’s scared of the responsibility placed on her but willing to rise to the challenge. She overcomes her self-doubt as she sails around the ice rink on her motorized boat. Kids are screaming, “I AM MOANA!” as she sings, “I am Moana!” There are fireworks inside Barclays when she finally saves her island.

But hold on. I have to take you back to the first part of the show for a second, when Belle comes out and floats around the outer edge of the rink. She flips through the pages of her book, ignoring Gaston (and his puffed out chest) as he tells her he’s going to marry her. She begins to sing: “I want so much more than they have plaaaanned.”

Children are cheering, reaching toward the stage, and I, a full-grown woman, break down into sobs. I’m crying because these shows are money-grabs designed to make you feel. They are operations that strike at the core of your being with surgical precision: Turn the lights down here, crescendo up to a chorus and strike a soaring note there, insert a key change, spin some spotlights, make the heroines reach toward the sky with longing. Each element must’ve been focus-grouped and tested within a billion-dollar inch of its life to tug at specific ventricles of your heart. I am powerless against Disney’s execution of this emotional warfare.

But I’m also crying because I’m looking at all these little girls around me — earnest, excited, hopeful — and I want them to have more than anyone has planned for them. I want them to glide off into the bright lights with a prince the way Belle does, if that’s what they truly desire. But I also want them to throw an encyclopedia at the Beast’s head and start their own bookstore, if that’s what they’d prefer. I want all the Gastons of the world — because I know they’ll meet more than a few of them — to be taken down before they encounter them. I want this world to be more fair than it currently is.

And it must be said that Disney is, in its own way, changing.

Whether it’s because feminism sells these days, or because it’s what Disney thinks is The Right Message, the company seems to be Leaning In. The 30 minute cliff-notes of stories, and the order in which Disney On Ice chose to present them — from oldest to most recent— made Dare to Dream feel like a trip through the brand’s feminist awakening. We started with women whose only rewards are finding men, then moved on to a woman whose primary complication is her relationship with her sister, and ended with a girl who literally saves her entire people with the help of her badass grandmother.

“She persevered and never lost sight of herself,” says the cheerful MC of Moana, after praising Cinderella’s ability to land a man and new footwear an hour earlier. “That's what inner strength is all about. Be yourself!”

The princesses come out to take a bow. The kids give all of them, especially Moana, big cheers, but save the biggest for Mickey and Minnie. Then the skaters disappear. Melinda is clapping. Sanaa grins. So do their mothers. They’re in the Happily Ever After for a moment. But then the lights come up.