#mine is cause of synesthesia

[mechs-headcanons]

HI OH MY GOD FELLOW SYNESTHESIA HAVER????

Wahoo!!

I do get the colors thing a lot but most of mine are tastes, so here we go!

Jonny: somewhere between this one peanut butter whiskey i had once, and like a rare steak

Nastya: blue gumballs, like that sweet yet food coloring-y taste

Ashes: smoked salt, also dr pepper

Ivy: this one white cheddar and cranberry cheese i got once

Brian: this really specific salt and lemon candy i sadly do not know the brand but it's Japanese so idk. Also buttered toast, weirdly enough

Toy Soldier: wooden blocks 🙏🙏 also cream cheese i cannot explain why

Tim: smoked salmon. And slightly burnt toast but in a good way, and i can't explain why but yknow that limited edition coconut dr pepper? That.

Raph: lime tortilla chips 100% also raspberries

Marius: HASHBROWNS!!!! Also maple syrup, bacon but cooked enough where it's not quite crispy yet, also fresh sage, and this one syrup i had as a kid that gets made from wild violets

Can you tell i think about Marius a lot teehee

-🩻

OH FUCK YEAH, here i’m gonna do both tastes and smells cause i have both for all of them:33 (these r copied from old texts)

jonny — tastes like fruit (specifically pineapple and cantaloupe) but if you add the d’ville he smells like copper

nastya — tastes like sweet bread and smells like the back of a closet (in a good way)

ashes — smoke and if you inhale in a musty basement. tastes like dust and lavender incense cones (which i’m allergic to, hashtag lavender makes me break out)

ivy — she tastes like a sticky note but i agree with the cheese statement. she smells like a new book

brian — tastes like honey, smells like rust remover:D

TS — it tastes like plastic and smells like sawdust. but now that you say cream cheese,,, i want to say cream cheese mini bagels for it too.

tim — for some reason i never did tim in my original taste assessment so. mmm yes he does taste like smoked salmon. but also like it’s slightly burnt? like over smoked. he also smells like cheap hairspray and when you use a compressed air duster.

raphaella — she tastes like costco rotisserie chicken and smells like just after it rains. also she has a creaky sound, for some reason.

marius — he tastes like when you bite your tongue and smells like violin rosin :D

mine r way less specific but thats okay </3

[outofangband]



Working on some longer xenobiology/speculative biology posts so in the meantime here are some more random thoughts

Updated edition a year later! I hope these are ok!!

These are more jotting down ideas, please please feel free to give me any to elaborate on!

Also not all of these I necessarily consider my Headcanons, they’re just fun to play around with

Location edition

1. Tapetum lucidum or, eyes that can glow in the dark. (similar to the eyes of cats and raccoons) This is not limited to the Caliquendi and so is not directly related to Treelight.

Related to this is the potential ability to see infrared or other light spectrums like certain animals. I do like the idea that elven vision in the dark is more complicated than simply being able to see through the dark.

They navigate in unique ways, using the earth, trees, and even rocks to orient themselves. (I’m basing this in part of Legolas’s words about the elves of Hollin where he appears to draw sense memories from flora and stones) This also fits into my ideas for some ways elves are disoriented and controlled within Angband.

When elves are kept away from the natural world, in monotonous environments, without access to plant life or even a variety of geological information, they can enter a sort of stupor. Even in Angband which of course does contain rocks and life in the form of fungi, algae and even some plants, Cyanobacteria and certain creatures, much of the mines and dungeons are deliberately kept barren, lifeless and separated enough from the caverns and tunnels. What information they receive is never comforting. On that note, Ecological empathy taken to an extreme. Elves becoming depressed from ecological destruction, feeling the changes to landscapes on an innate level. Hence again why Angband is so damaging

Ears that express a wide range of emotions like how eyebrows do with humans. Elven ears will flatten, perk up, twitch, and even fold at times.

. I talked about phosphorescence here which actually has roots in canon!

Being able to navigate on all fours with ease, particularly while climbing and on a similar note, advanced balance.

For some of them, partially webbed feet and possibly even gill like structures on their chests for the sea elves.

On that note I think evolution works obviously differently for elves. Traits adapt and spread at different rates.

Pressure to areas of their body causes them to fall still, like with puppies and kittens. They have very sensitive areas in the backs of their necks and behind their ears. I've talked about this on my states of consciousness and sleep posts!

They do not have fingerprints though the skin on their hands will sometimes absorb and take in the colors of the things they touch, regardless of skin tone though skin tone does effect how clearly these show. For example, if an elven child spends some time playing in grass or clay, they may come back home with the skin up to their forearms that color.

Elves rarely have freckles but those that do will notice that they change colors and shades. Sometimes russet, sometimes even silvery, gold, or blueish. This is also true with birthmarks and even some scars. As they predate the sun their freckles are more similar to spots for camouflage and most words for them translates something to spots or foilage.

Elves can imitate sounds of animals very easily, especially bird and insect songs. While being able to communicate with animals is a rare gift among them, most can speak basic warnings and declarations, such as being able to warn sparrows that there is a hawk around. They can also pick up song very easily, often feeling the rhythm of even very gentle music in their hands.

I have a lot of thoughts on elves and synesthesia. I think most stimuli and input for elves is experienced through multiple senses for example being able to feel sound (obviously humans can to through vibrations but elves are more attuned to this). Synesthesia of the kind humans experience is somewhat more common in elves and other kinds unique to them also exist. (I have a whole post about this here!)

I talked about snow blindness and elves’ unique experiences with winter here!

I headcanon that elves have a specific sense for growth; they can hear and feel for lack of a better phrasing, shoots of grass growing, flowers blooming, roots expanding out. Not all are equally attuned to it or aware of it and some can become extremely overwhelmed by it if their ability to process is affected.

[ironunderstands]

help I have been afflicted by Boothill brainrot time to share some shitty angst bulletpoints with the class (that I’ll probably turn into a fic later)

I don’t think I have to tag anything specific but be warned there’s probably something bad in here so if you understandably don’t wanna read that then scroll. Expect cyborg related angst (and minor spoilers)

Also I hc Boothill as nonbinary (using he/they and occasionally she) so if you’re wondering about the use of multiple pronouns that’s why, it’s not related to the angst, I just don’t want people to be confused.

-has a sensation of touch on the metal parts of his body, but it’s visibly muted compared to his skin and it drives them nuts

-despises hot/cold temperatures due to how they interact with the metal parts of their body, on especially hot days

-very vulnerable to hacking and it scares the shit out of him (thanks past obsession with Genji for giving me this one, the amount of “Sombra hacks Genji and he has a bad time” stuff I have read is unhealthy, even if she would only do it for the shits and giggles or a mission, a character losing control of their body is unfortunately very compelling please don’t cancel me)

-can’t remember their past life or how he died but still has nightmares of it

-phantom pain is a bitch and her name is Boothill

-won’t be seen as human by most people (even actual people write him this way which is a little weird to me, like I know the Robot/Human tag w Boothill serving as a Robot is probably just for reach, but like, he’s still human, he’s not a robot, he’s a cyborg, idk it’s just a pet peeve of mine)

-has to go to the scientist who made him to get “upgrades” (aka whatever they feel like fucking with this week) against their will

-he can’t remember his old life, but they can remember how their body felt back then and the cyborg one distinctly Doesn’t Feel The Same

-Boothill’s synesthesia beacon doesn’t just prevent Boothill from cursing, it prevents her from saying certain things entirely which makes it very hard for him to express his feelings

-charging induces sleep for them, something which Boothill tries to hide as it could be used against him

-debating between making Boothill unreasonable heavy (because metal) or unreasonably light (because high tech) both scenarios cause problems for him, feel free to torture yourself for as to why

-animals (especially dogs) don’t like them as Boothill doesn’t have as strong a scent nor the flesh of other humans which is why it’s hard for them to trust him, which sucks for Boothill because he loves animals

-doesn’t even know the planet they were originally from or how old he was when he died, Boothill doesn’t even know their birthday, so it ended up becoming the day he was brought back to life against his will

-gets called “it” by people who don’t like cyborgs or people that are non-organic/have nonorganic parts of their body/existence, I also share this for the trailblazer because of their dubious origins, I’d like to believe transphobia isn’t a thing in Star rail because it’s already tiring enough irl and there’s no proof for it unlike other real world problems, so the misgendering happens for other horrible reasons! Horrible reasons that are close to canon considering the whole organic/inorganic war thing depicted by the Sim Uni, I’d imagine a lot of people are still bitter about that (honestly I don’t know the details I was there for the jades) and/or ignorant enough to believe that only fleshy beings have a monopoly on personhood (it/its pronouns are cool but not on people who don’t want to use them!)

-constantly pushes the limits of their body (aka self destructive behavior), I doubt Boothill would be trying to hurt herself but it’s more of a “it will get fixed anyway” kinda thing, any injuries sustained still hurt like a bitch but Boothill forces himself to not care because well “it’s his job and he will get healed anyways” (also it’s implied from their LC that he’s a Galaxy ranger against his will from the whole “never living for themself again” thing, so Boothill probably has to get injured for the job and is just forced to grin and bear it

alright that’s all the angst my sleep deprived brain could cook up for now if I did something wrong or missed a tag pls tell me

[psitaniumpsichosis]

~ Spoilers obviously ~

Here he is, Razputin Aquato! Lead vocalist of the Deluded Deluge and our favorite Psychonaut!

This band is just a tiny part of the Time Travel Terrors AU, a big passion project of mine that I've been working on for the past week or so :)!

If the font is too hard to read, tell me and I'll provide a transcription ASAP! Read more cause there is a tiny ramble oops

Quick note on April 21st, this au has been mostly abandoned. I've put my focus more into the Psichosis Timeline, which includes a handful of things from this au.

The only reason I've kept this posted is preservation!

OCs mentioned:

Ginnifer Barkys and Henry Zanotto-Fullbear Jr.

These two are a fun one. In the TTT au, Bob and Helmut adopted two children back in the day, Valley and Henry. Valley was a lot like Bob, a very withdrawn and shy girl who preferred plants over people. Henry however was a rambunctious, buckwild kid with no sense of self preservation.

After the Deluge, Bob fell into a depression and the two (at the time) teenagers had no choice but to leave once it got too hard to sustain themselves and stay on Bob's good side. They both ended up living in France and having families-- Valley having Ginnifer, and Henry having his Junior -- affectionately called Littlebear.

After the two returned, with their families in tow, they were able to reunite with their fathers-- only now, the previously non-psychic children showed psychic abilities!!... Well, okay, Valley did. Henry is still just nuts.

Ginny is very reserved but is extremely snappy, specializing in herbaphony and always carrying some mutated, psychic Venus flytraps in her bag. She's not afraid to beat Littlebear senseless.

Littlebear is a mini-Henry, but is a psychic-- specializing in Pyrokinesis. He has synesthesia, frequently describing the sensations people's voices/any music gives him.

Esther Cruller

Esther is, as you can assume, the granddaughter Ford Cruller. Turns out he had at least one kid running around he was unaware of, and Esther-- suspiciously-- popped up shortly after the first incident of the Time Travelling Terrors.. hmm...

Natalie O'Pia

Natalie is one of a set of twins, her brother being Nikolai O'Pia. They're Cassie's grandchildren, her daughter being their mother and a well respected Psychonaut. Their father is a mystery to them, but.. it's better they don't know about him just yet.

~~~~

More tidbits because I'm brainrotting

- Raz and Lili aren't dating, but they're very close friends-- Lili bullying Raz lovingly for his very obvious crush on Littlebear.

- In TTT, Lili's mother is Otto Mentallis' youngest daughter. Otto had three children, but the other two have been MIA since the Deluge.

- Raz has one more older sibling-- a sister named Jackie. Her original name was Vanya, but she changed it after leaving the family at 17(when Raz was 4).

- Otto completely erased empathy and most negative emotion from his mind with the astralathe after the Deluge, hence his strange behavior and lack of guilt or trauma. He had many reasons to do this, but Raz intends on going in to figure it out himself.

[catastrfy]

i wrote this in April 2019 and want to share it here

Autism Acceptance Month 2019 Day 10

Book Characters Who I've Identified With and/or Who Ping Me As Autistic

I've been wanting to do this as a counter to the Bewareness idea of OMGEPIDEMIC for a while, because good grief, people who seem to be autistic (at least to me) have been in books for well over a hundred years!

Beth in Little Women: too shy for school or socialising, preferred to be home with her family, including her kittens. (I have always always loathed Marmee for forever for intentionally letting Beth's Pip die. alsolutely despise her.) Beth's slow decline after her scarlet fever was very easy to identify with; my undxed back then eds/pots/mcas meant I was always a sickly, weak child.

Autistic (to me) characters are ALL OVER in the Agatha Christie books (and her autobiography makes me wonder if she was herself).

Mr Goby always addresses inanimate objects instead of the person he's talking to.

Miss Lemon loves organising, wishes to create the world's first perfect filing system, and isn't social.

Poirot has his passion for symmetry and tidiness, no hesitation about ignoring social conventions.

Ariadne Oliver uses scripting to deal with fans, ignores social conventions, feels awkward a lot, and ... I'm not even sure what else, but she is my favourite of all the characters and pings me *really* hard.

Megan Hunter in Christie's "The Moving Finger" is described as much younger than her age, clumsy, doesn't understand why people care what she wears or why it's important (I identified hard with her when i was in my teens/early 20s)

In at least one of the Christie books, a character remarks to another character that every family has someone odd in it, whether it's that they're slow or brilliant. Every. Family.

In LM Mongomery's Jane of Lantern Hill, Millicent Mary Snowbeam is 6, doesn't talk, and is considered by others to be "not all there". In Magic for Marigold, the elderly Derusha siblings Abel and Tabby: Abel is called "cracked" for not being conventional, and Tabby is called "not all there".

Zenna Henderson's People stories: Bethie in Gilead is an untrained Sensitive who is overwhelmed by the sensory stuff from other people and can't handle school. "She tried school at first, but skinned knees and rough rassling and aching teeth and bumped heads and the janitor's Monday hangover sent her home exhausted and shaking the first day, with hysteria hanging on the flick of an eyelash." -- that hysteria hanging on the flick of an eyelash was ME so much in school!

In "Wilderness" there's Lucine, "my 12 year old first grader". She's filled with rage over the bullying and abuse she gets for being slow and different. She erupts when it gets to be too much and is treated like a dangerous animal after she injures one of the bullies.

(I also like the reference to synesthesia in one of the bridging bits in "Pilgrimage" that ties the stories together: the fruit koomatkas are described as tasting like music sounds.

These are all stories that predate "autism" as a diagnosis.

But we were there. From those of us with low support needs to those of us with complex support needs.

If you're Autistic, what book characters have pinged you or have you identified with?

~Autisticat

(ps: yes, mine are mostly older books cause I am mostly older *grin* *skitters off, stage left!*)

[finn-m-corvex]

GOOD MORNING, FINN! Wait, no, it's night for you. Uhhh, good night??? Well, good *time* (bear with me, it's 5 am)

#other moots if you see this feel free to ask about yours too!

Synesthesia sounds so cool! Do you know how it works or what causes it? (It's fine if you don't; I'll just google it myself) And if it's alright with you, may I ask what color am I?

TARA! It is indeed 11 pm as I am answering this, but I've been having a very good night!

I'm not entirely sure what causes it, but I do know that SOME studies have found evidence that it might be linked to the same genes that influence your dominant hand, so lefties would be more likely to have it. And it works in all kinds of ways! Mine is sound/text to color, but @mostdefinitelyahumanperson has taste and smell! It can be anything from hearing sounds and seeing shapes, smelling something and seeing colors, or hearing a sound and tasting something. No person's experience is the same! It's just another way that helps people like us to experience the world; I consider it a sixth sense that has spoiled EVERY reveal in Ninjago up to this point bc I can tell by the color of their voice who they are (Samurai X, Ice Emperor, Harumi, Krux, Pythor, all of them).

OF COURSE YOU CAN KNOW YOUR COLORS! Here you go!

There's a TINT of green to all of these that I can't put in the pictures!

[walpu]

"would it be weird if I said something?" rakhsh asks out of the blue, sorting through some of the pictures he had take in the past few weeks and placing some of them in a photo album.

"depends. what's that somethin'?" boothill inquires after a short pause, placing his hat on the other man's head as he leaned against the knight's shoulder, looking absentmindedly at the pages of the album.

rakhsh let out a breath, placing the pictures down as he studied them quietly to decide their placement in the pages. "I..." I always found you beautiful, wanted to hold you, to kiss you, to love you openly, "I took some pictures of you. you can have them," he states, placing four pictures in front of him, trying to distract himself from his thoughts.

boothill stared, bewilderment obvious on his face as he looks over the pictures. "nice pics you got of me darlin'" he drawls as his metallic fingers run over the glossy paper, "would've loved a picture of us both though."

at that, rakhsh pauses, ripping his gaze away from the photo album to gaze at the man lounging against his shoulder. "of us? why?" the question tumbles out of his mouth before he can stop himself, frowning slightly at his slip-up but trying to cover it up, "i mean, it's not easy to take pictures of... of the two of us when I'm the one holding the camera."

"I said what I said, sweetheart. I'd like your pretty face next to mine," boothill shrugs, sliding the pictures back to the knight, "and keep these. y' might need 'em if I ever got turned to scrap p-" "don't say things like that," rakhsh interrupts him, still frowning.

"I don't even care if you're cussing me out— you'd never turn to scrap pieces, because you won't let them; and if they ever try to get to you, they'd have to go through me first," the words spill out of his mouth like it's the most natural thing to say— it would've been if it weren't for the sober atmosphere.

"I never asked you what I said that night to make you stay— but whatever it was, know that I meant it from the bottom of my heart," he continues, taking off the hat that the other placed on his head and held it against his heart, "I never wanted to admit it. I swear on my oath as a knight, I didn't want to come to terms with these thoughts cause I didn't want to disrupt what we already had going on— the comfort, the talks, everything. but I can't let you go on talking like I'd never bat an eye if you were to meet your demise."

boothill stares at the other, feeling like his synesthesia module is failing for a few moments before he forces out one word, "why?"

the knight looks at him, feeling like he's about to burst from the overwhelming feelings. "why? you're asking me why? boothill quit humoring me. quit acting like I've never told you anything about how I feel. I care for you like you're a part of me; like I'd stop functioning if something was to happen to you— and I'd probably do, honestly. you're the only one I have, I don't want to lose you, I love you."

the two stared silently at each other, letting those words of raw feelings hang in the air between them.

(it got wayyyyy too long ngl)

-🐙

IT'S NOT TOO LONG AND NOT RUSHED?? ABD JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF SLOPPY

ANYWAY I LOVE THEM ❗❗❗

May they help each other with their mental health because the help is needed fr

[ihaveasolutionbutyouwontlikeit]

I have a particular kind of synesthesia with colours, specifically with the colour blue and the colour yellow. Perceiving blue in a room (depending on shade and amount seen in ratio with the room or space) makes me hyperaware of it, severely uncomfortable and tense if I have to be near a lot of it or stand/walk directly on it, and touching the colour with my bare skin will vary from feeling greasy on the skin that touched it to outright nausea in my core.

My capacity around dealing (and therefore the way the physical feeling may present) with the colour will fluctuate according to the variables of shape, my ability to avoid or strategise around the colour (for example, using a paper towel to open a milk container with a blue lid) and if there are other colours around to visually "balance" it's general effect. If I am mentally and emotionally well regulated, my capacity for regulating and strategising around the colour increases, and the cognitive load effect from doing so is low. It takes energy but I have this energy to use so it's manageable. It's always there as a factor, but I can work it through a back of mind processing tab. When I'm dysregulated for whatever reason, the capacity for taking in blue visually or by touch is comprised, the energy is already being / has already been used for another regulation need or task (whether it's mine or another person's), and as such I don't have the capacity to mentally take on more without conscious effort, which then in and of itself adds on to the dysregulation load. In a sense, even when I'm regulated, I'm using energy to stay regulated on a loop of visual biofeedback, which in a sense means that I am always *slightly dysregulated* because you try taking an entire spectrum colour out of your visual field. Even on my phone or computer or when I go outside, there is at least ONE blue thing. I can confidently say that the only time I don't perceive blue is in my dreams. (It's weirdly fascinating).

In comparison, yellow has a subtler but more positive effect, in that I can (sometimes) mitigate the physical response to blue by intentionally touching yellow items or warm light, but only after the blue is no longer causing continued sensory input. In the case of the greasy fingers feeling, I can "wipe" my hands on my clothing and *sometimes* that is enough to dissipate the feeling, but not always. Having said that, the touching of or intentionally bathing in other colours to mitigate blue's effect is a more recent discovery and I'm still learning how to apply it.

So what I'm getting at is the texture/audio sensory thing mentioned above can also translate to links between visual and tactile sensory strategies of "oh no I touched/saw the thing, I want to vomit, but look there's my safe item/light/texture".

I'm so glad this gets talked about more now too, because it's difficult enough explaining a sensory processing issue or problem (often there are minimal "real life" examples that seem to fit your own experience of something and so you lack the confidence, understanding, or vocab in explaining what is occurring or being perceived), without also dealing with the downplay that can often present from others, because they themself have had their own unique experiences downplayed or gaslit into thinking it's "weird", "not a thing" or something entirely different to what is actually occurring, thus keeping it to the "we don't talk about Bruno" level of secrecy, on pain of "shame".

I believe that everyone experiences these unique displays of sensory profiling. It makes sense that they do, with brains being as neuroplastic and adaptable and powerful in the ways of data processing as they are, it makes logical sense for there to be several thousand spectrum presentations embedded within each person, who is by default a conglomerate of their genomic data, their nutritional, emotional, mental, spiritual, physical and social complexity and interrelated needs, their always changing conscious awareness and further unconscious data building and construction of neurological pathways that support the interoceptive data, and their perceived sense of "control" over their own life. It makes sense to me that this process is CONTINUAL and in flux. It makes sense that the more we understand about others and our own experiences, the more likely we are able to problem solve, but in order to get to the understanding we need to have had data shared and knowledge/experiences talked about and experienced first. Data cannot come about from no data. There needs to be something there to compute or triangulate, to process and ping around, sometimes for years, before it's fully comprehended and understood. But the more often data points are shared in the context of curiosity and acceptance, rather than shame or fear, the faster and more thoroughly they are processed, categorised (oh boy do we love to categorise and organise), and understood. They result in branching ideas that compute faster, better, more specifically or broadly depending on context, and increased understanding in self and other awareness.

Person 1 may have an understanding that they have a sensitivity to excessive noise, and has been told they shut down since childhood from this exposure. However upon discovering a tool like ear protectors with headphone capabilities, they can handle, and in fact enjoy, moderately loud music from their favourite artists. (This is a case of sensory overwhelm being mitigated by the ability to control a previously uncontrolled factor). They could remain fearful of all environments with loud noises, and avoid them, whether they are currently loud or not, or apply the positively received sensory input, with or without help depending on needs and fluctuating capacity, in an environment that would otherwise cause dysregulation or distress. The fear and anxiety around the environment gets slowly turned around and allows for growth, strategy and capacity building. Person 1 now knows that the loud noises in that particular environment usually only occur on weekdays, and got so comfortable going there after several years, that one weekend they forgot their ear protection completely, but were able to manage with earplugs and humming their favourite song, as a self made in the moment strategy. This neuroplasticity and further data input and integration around the original sensory input strategy, that had been wired to a very specific brain path protocol during their youth (toomuch>adrenaline and cortisol flooding>further toomuch = shutdown safety protocol) was built over and given alternate pathways due to the sensory input from strategies IN LINE with the person's presentation of their sensory profile, not directly against it or through repeated exposure and attempted resilience conditioning, which is what would historically occur.

Seventy years ago, this person would have been locked up in a psychiatric institution "for their own safety". Twenty years ago, this person would be classed as stupid and "retarded/special", by a lot of society. Ten years ago, this person would be undergoing ABA and Asperger's therapies. Today, slowly and incrementally, there is a shift occurring. People are talking. People are finding that their experiences are unique but not as individual and rare as they were made to believe or understood when they were younger. There are commonalities and similarities and in the act of not feeling alone, people feel validated, which again gives them greater ability to search for further knowledge and practice communicating their experiences and start working on problem solving and strategy application instead of only mitigating the damage and associated fear or shame components.

If I had grown up knowing what synesthesia was, or even what Autism was, and had validation/acceptance of how my brain transmutes the data into something undesirable, like nausea or greasy fingers, I would have been able to build strategy and understanding of this one component of my profile much sooner, potentially creating subconscious fluency around it and not pay it as much thought, energy, or focused attention now. This is part of the reason it's so so so important to take the things kids say seriously. Trust, value and respect them enough to practice curiosity, to model leaning in and unpacking things, and learn to explore differences and strategy application and the way we communicate about all the things, with growth mindedness, together. If you love your kids, listen to them and take what they say at face value.

Each person is a condensed universe that lives multidimensionally within another, each child, each animal and insect and microbe will teach you more about open mindedness and observation lenses and interconnection and so many other things than all the books and videos and tapes and cd's in the world, because our brains adapted, first and foremost to learn "in the real world". A safe simulacrum can be beneficial. But a real life lived experience and conversation will teach you more than you were ever expecting to know.

I wish you an abundant leaning in and a bountiful harvest of understanding and acceptance. ✌️

My new coworker and I were just talking about our most dreaded Bad Texture Experiences and I mentioned that touching microfiber fabric makes me want to take off my hands and put them in the dishwasher, but that the next best thing is touching something else with a radically different texture, and that sometimes this makes me Weird in stores.

"Do you have a rock?" they asked, and then looked sort of embarrassed. "Or--not necessarily a rock, just, like--"

"Yeah, of course I have a rock," I said, and took my rock out of my pocket.

With relief, they said, "Oh, good. Me, too," and presented their own rock.

[its-aspec-objectsic-time]

intro post~

Hello and welcome! you have found your way to my objectum and posic centric side blog! (Also sometimes a computerkin blog or sm)

I mostly reblog stuff, but am trying to hopefully talk more about my own experiences and whatnot.

Some things about me that are related to this blog: I’m aspec, and that classes and intersects with my objectum identity. I am also otherkin, nonhuman in general, I’d prefer not to be viewed as human, I have synesthesia which interacts with and is one of the causes for me being posic. (As I am multiposic) I also have conceptum partners that relate to concept kintypes I have (I’m memento mori and I love memento vivere and death, I’m cabincore and I love cottagecore.) and my familial relation to old computers as I am an old computer myself.

my object and concept sweethearts/darlings/partners/crushes:

the ocean

my computer (qpr)

This cozy sweater of mine (qpr)

Death (concept)

memento vivere (concept)

cottagecore (aesthetic/concept)

a library book (I do not dare tell what book it is)

quantum computers

old computers (familial)

the public transport busses where I live (qpr)

[mechs-headcanons]

colors I associate with the crew:

Jonny: red/black like his nails

nastya: blue/teal like her hair

ivy: red

Raphaella: green ??? I think ??? Like mad scientist green

ashes: dark red

Brian: gold/gold orange

Tim: brown

Marius: red again

the toy soilder: red again

I realized that most of them are red but they all have a lot of red in their outfits 😔

mmm i’m gonna compare mine:0 (i have synesthesia so mine are more inspired by their voices and general vibes) ALSO I HAD TO RESTART THIS POST HALFWAY THROUGH HHH :,33

jonny — orange, usually sandy but it sometimes goes more amber. :}

nastya — also blue/teal but it also has a green-grey tint

ivy — reddish pink, like a raspberry colour

raphaella — raphaella is actually a gold bronze to me? maybe it’s cause i’m going off of her voice but she’s a very elegant colour in my head

ashes — orange or a charcoal. probably both. like when the fire has burnt out and you’re left with charr and embers. she also has some purple, surprisingly enough

brian — green, cause yk, hang man rusts :D he also smells like rust remover

tim — tan/beige

marius — green and reddish brown, idk why 🤷

TS — bright red w gold :D

[universe-sailing-echoes]

Relationships are fickle matters to Fae. Countless of lips have pressed against his. Different warmths filled his bed. And several hands have held him close. Yet not one was ever truly permanent, not even lasting longer than a week or so.

//suggestive

-👓

It felt as if, there was an insatiable desire, that no one could ever satisfy. Not a single person could fill that empty space Fae considers his heart.

Then again, perhaps it simply couldn't be any ordinary, everyday person.

Fae's been assigned to conduct initial reconnaissance for an upcoming mission. As is his specialty. The location was a well-known bar situated somewhere on the corner of some street he doesn't care enough to know.

It's a mildly enjoyable task, since he gets to meet a few faces here and there, mingling with drunkards and making connections.

Equipped with an audio recorder and a few bills to spend, he subjects himself to a neonlight hell.

"Jeez..." Fae mumbles as he makes his way to the bar, assaulted by the bright orange and swirls of green that emit from the stereos.

See, the only downside to performing recon in busy places like these is the overabundance of sound that causes Fae's synesthesia to go ballistic.

"Hey, 'tender, make me a Manhattan," he says as taps his finger on the varnished wood. Then Fae scans the area.

Cinnabar said it'd be a delicate mission. They'd be escorting a huge pile of cash. Tempting for anyone whose got a firearms license, especially in this side of town.

It's not as if bullets were fatal to them fusions anyway, Cinnabar just wanted a clean exchange, no dirt on his reputation.

There's a couple places an ambush could be set up. Lots of nooks and crannies in this place, he ponders, before turning his attention to the liquor set in front of him.

As he raises the glass to his lips, someone takes the seat beside him.

Hmm?

Blue visors.. and a heavy jacket lined with fur.

And that aura is unmistakably...

"Ginger beer, please," they say.

Fae blinks, setting his glass down without taking a sip.

"Hey, hey," he leans towards the stranger, "you new around here?"

"Hm?" Behind those visors, are stark, pale periwinkle eyes. His expression questioning.

Fae grins, "British accent."

"Oh, I suppose you could say that," he said, then he chuckles, turning fully towards Fae, "P-pardon, I'm..."

Then the casual expression on the fusion's face disappears, "You're..."

"Ah! Shhh," Fae lifts his finger to the other's lips, "there's no fun if we say it, no?"

"..Is that so?"

The drink he ordered, ginger beer, is placed on the counter. Fae downs his own drink, as the other fusions sips his.

"Say.. let's call each other something other than our names tonight," said Fae, watching the mix of colors he sees bathe the fusion

His eyes glimmer in the dim light, "Oh?"

Fae leans in, and places his finger right in the middle of the fusion's chest, "Mm... Pretty boy. Your face is quite adorable. It fits."

Maybe it's the bar's mood lighting, but he swears the fusion flushes deeply.

How cute...

"Aren't you a flirt," laughed the fusion, with a hint of bashfulness.

Fae tilts his head, "I take pride in it."

"What shall I call you then?"

"Oh, anything that comes to mind," smiled Fae, leaning against the counter.

And with that his recon mission is long forgotten.

Only minutes later, he finds himself pressed up against the wall, breaths hot and heavy as the other fusion pulls away.

"You're not bad at all, pretty boy," Fae chuckles breathlessly. He was shorter, overshadowed by the fusion's taller build.

He gently places his gloved hand to Fae's cheek, the satin is smooth, "I aim to impress."

"Oh, well," Fae asserts a little more pressure with his thigh, enjoying the way the other fusion's breath hitches.

"I'll let you know.. I'm quite the overachiever."

[Play Audio Recording?]

> Yes

No

Faint rustling.

"..Shall I have the privilege of knowing your name then?

"It's a secret, you know."

"I'll tell you mine."

"And here I thought you liked being called 'pretty boy'."

"I find that names have value."

"Hmph, fine."

"..."

"It's Aurelius."

"...That sounds beautiful."

"How sweet of you, and yours?"

"Xevias."

[k00293213]

For this short project we were given the prompt PORTRAIT and the main aim that we were given was to think about this theme but beyond the realm of a traditional portrait. Think of what it is, could be and has been. Throughout my time in first year i have experimented with portraiture in all of my projects with various themes and reasons for doing so. I went right into this with brainstorming what portraiture can be beyond just what someone looks like.

I came across the artist Jennifer Packer where in an interview she talked about what she wants to capture in a portrait, is it how a person looks or how a person feels?. This idea of capturing personality as oppose to the person is what i decided to expand on in the project.

I decided to focus on an experience of mine that builds a lot of the foundations of my personality and this is my deep connection to music. I experience synesthesia which is defined as “when your brain routes sensory information through multiple unrelated senses causing you to experience more than one sense simultaneously”. For me this manifests in having tactile responses too music, shakes, shivers, twitches. Alongside this i see shapes n colours when listening to specific works.

I explored synesthesia by creating paintings based off of my favourite albums, painting myself while listening to those same albums and trying to encapsulate what those shapes look like. For this i used gouache, acrylic and watercolour paints on a variety of grounds.

When comparing this to my previous projects i feel a lot more satisfied that i started, explored and finalised a lot more artworks.

Overall i think the display of works I’ve made very well encapsulates the visuals that i wanted to get across, a very dreamlike wonderous depiction of the experience of synesthesia.

[actualhumansunshine]

niallhoran IG live | 20.04  ↳ “My favorite lyric from Black And White?”

[bbeebbug]

TASTEFUL

Ryuji x Yusuke

One shot based off a line Ryuji has in the 5th palace of the game.

—💛—

The team stared at Ryuji when he asked that question. “We gotta find the red one and the green one, yeah? So like…food colors?”

Makoto’s head turned. “Huh? What is that even supposed to mean?”

Ryuji shook his head, “you know like? Green tastes like Seaweed but specifically the sea salt flavor.” He scratched his cheek. Did he just say something weird? “You guys don’t taste colors?” He asked, “isn’t that? Normal?”

Makoto shook her head, “No thats not normal- I think that’s called-“

Yusuke interrupted her, “that’s synesthesia-“

“What?” Ryuji seemed confused.

Morgana groaned, jumping up and down waving his arms, “we don’t have time to talk about this right now! Palace?!”

“Right Right. Sorry Mona.” Ryuji said as he shook his head. He’d have to ask Yusuke about that later.

Ryuji didn’t know that was weird, he always thought colors tasted like things, like when he said or thought or heard a color sometimes he would taste it. Like not a subtle taste or what he thought it tasted like. It was like he had stuck the color in his mouth. Burnt Sienna tasted like Ramen, Yellow tasted like Lemons but sweet, more like Lemonade. Yellow was his favorite. But not mustard yellow, that tasted like raw onions.

Ryuji thought about that all through the Palace until they came to a safe room. He walked over to Yusuke and sat next to him, “can you tell me more about that um… syn-anesthesia thing?”

“Synesthesia?” He asked. Yusuke placed his hand on top of Ryuji’s causing the other to blush.

“Um yeah- that!” He smiled.

“Well it’s a condition where your cognitive pathways mix together, one of the more common ones is when you hear music you see shapes. But yours is when you hear or say a color you taste it it seems like. It’s very interesting. I always wished I could know what that was like. Alas my brain is not that creative.”

“Are you saying I’m creative? And interesting?” Ryuji smiled.

“You are a stunning masterpiece Skull.” Yusuke said, “what flavor would you say Blue is like? Blueberries?”

Ryuji was in shock before shaking his head, “no- actually this one is… really specific, blue raspberry but more specifically blue raspberry popsicles.”

Yusuke smiled, “that’s really… amazing Ry-Skull. Blue is my favorite color.”

“Y-yeah mine too.” He said in awe. Ryuji then mentally smacked himself, “sorry- I spaced mines Yellow. Which tastes like Lemonade. Most colors taste sweet to me.”

“Really? Well I think it’s because you’re a sweet person yourself Skull.” Yusuke squeezed his hand.

Ryuji giggled some. Biting his lip. “Well- I’m… um” He leaned in close. Drawing in a deep breath. “You’re very sweet yourself Fox.”

Yusuke leaned in himself, pushing up Ryuji’s mask, “You’re very red Skull.”

Ryuji seemed to grow redder. Leaning closer, lifting Yusuke’s mask too, kissing him. Holding the kiss for a while before pulling away, “you taste like blue raspberry popsicles.”

Yusuke laughed some. Smiling as he covered his mouth. “And you taste like Lemonade.”

[dionysianfreak]

is anyone interested in my music associations for the Theoi ? actually I don't care you're getting them anyways.

as I've shared before music is super important in my practice. i have synesthesia so my personal connections between Divine energy and music is very strong. so, I want to share my strongest song connections to each God I have a playlist for. i hope you enjoy the Theoi per my brain

Their playlists are linked in Their names if you'd like to see it in full. this is a long one, so the songs and playlists are under the cut !

Dionysos

general vibe: fast paced, sensual, ecstatic, fatherly, reckless, sadistic

song association: Verbatim — Mother Mother

I cross my legs just like a queer but my libido is strong when a lady is near, ya. What defines a straight man's straight? Is it the boxer in the briefs or a 12 ounce steak? I tell you what a women loves most, it's a man who can slap but can also stroke

song association: Sunflower — Post Malone

Every time I'm walkin' out I can hear you tellin' me to turn around. Fightin' for my trust and you won't back down even if we gotta risk it all right now. I know you're scared of the unknown. You don't wanna be alone. I know I always come and go but it's out of my control

Aphrodite

general vibe: feminine, lovestruck, independent, sexual, prideful

song association: Butterfly's Repose — Zabawa

But it's time to rest, now. Let it all melt now, wipe your tears. The sun's already set, now. Won't you go to sleep, now? I'll see you in your dreams, 'cause I'm right here. Darlin', I'm right here

song association: Sugar Daddy — Qveen Herby

If it's my right to taste the riches of the earth–these bitches better let me work. A private host, a private toast, to new horizons. Nevermind what I had to do to get these diamonds

Hermès

general vibe: obscure, crafty, goofy, wooden, repetitive

song association: Homage — Mild High Club

Please just have a laugh with me 'cause you know I'm borrowing by now. These sounds have already crowned. Come on, it's a silly dream, dreaming of the imagery unfound. The view sits nice from that cloud. and if you want a piece of my thoughts there's a coin worth flipping, why don't you toss?

song association: The Bidding — Tally Hall

I graduated at the top, I like to take advantage of the bourgeoisie, so if you have a fantasy of being a queen maybe you should blow a couple bucks on me. Going once, going twice, won't these gentlemen suffice? Any here? Any there? Any motions anywhere? Going twice going thrice–Guess this means we'll go four times a lady

song association: There Is a Light That Never Goes Out — The Smiths

And if a double-decker bus crashes into us to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die. And if a ten ton truck kills the both of us–to die by your side, well, the pleasure, the privilege is mine

Hekate

general vibe: loud, wrathful, angry, avenged, strong, dominant

song association: IC3PEAK — Грустная Сука

Wild dogs are afraid both of me and of fire, that’s not a coincidence. I’m throwing up right on your marble floor, grinning at shadows in the mirror. Cross yourself every time you see me, I disrupt your beliefs. I’m ruining your day with my dead pale face...There is no one above me here luxury life is not my style. I love mud, it makes me high, I smile only when I bite

song association: Nightmare — Halsey

No, I won't smile, but I'll show you my teeth and I'ma let you speak if you just let me breathe. I've been polite, but won't be caught dead lettin' a man tell me what I should do in my bed. Keep my exes in check in my basement 'cause kindness is weakness, or worse, you're complacent. I could play nice or I could be a bully–I'm tired and angry, but somebody should be

Pan

general vibe: indie rock, masculine, indulgent, lonely, melancholy, stoner-esque, classic

song association: Breathe (In the Air) — Pink Floyd

Breathe, breathe in the air. Don't be afraid to care. Leave, but don't leave me. Look around, choose your own ground. Long you live and high you fly. Smiles you'll give and tears you'll cry, and all you touch and all you see is all your life will ever be

song association: Do I Wanna Know? — Arctic Monkeys

Have you no idea that you're in deep? I dreamt about you nearly every night this week. How many secrets can you keep? 'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat until I fall asleep. Spilling drinks on my settee

Kore

general vibe: dynamic, floral, gentle, dangerous, soft

song association: Persephone in the Garden — Aidoneus

Did you know I was there? Did you know what I needed? How, how long did I stand in the garden with my breath against the leaves as the trees bowed down and weeds would gather around my legs up to my knees

song association: Plant Life — Owl City

I'd rather waltz than just walk through the forest. The trees keep the tempo and they sway in time. Quartet of crickets chime in for the chorus. If I were to pluck on your heartstrings would you strum on mine? I've been longing for daisies to push through the floor, and I wish that plant life would grow all around me so I won't feel dead anymore

Hera

general vibe: vengeful, powerful, femme fatale, protective, motherly, regal

song association: Everything Matters — AURORA

You're part of the dawn where the light comes from the dark. You're a part of the morning and everything matters. And we are, an atom and a star. You're a part of the movement and everything matters to me

song association: Black Velvet — Alannah Myles

Mississippi in the middle of a dry spell. Jimmy Rogers on the Victrola up high. Mama's dancin' with a baby on her shoulder, the sun is settin' like molasses in the sky. The boy could sing, knew how to move, everything. Always wanting more, he'd leave you longing for black velvet and that little boy's smile. Black velvet with that slow southern style. A new religion that'll bring ya to your knees, black velvet if you please

Zeus

general vibe: contemplative, solemn, regal, boisterous, classic, gentle, classic

song association: Dreams — Fleetwood Mac

Oh, thunder only happens when it's raining. Players only love you when they're playing. Say, women, they will come and they will go. When the rain washes you clean, you'll know, you'll know. Now here I go again, I see the crystal visions. I keep my visions to myself. It's only me who wants to wrap around your dreams and have you any dreams you'd like to sell? Dreams of loneliness

song association: The Great Gig in the Sky — Pink Floyd

And I am not frightened of dying. Any time will do, I don't mind. Why should I be frightened of dying? There's no reason for it, you've gotta go sometime. If you can hear this whispering you are dying

Ares

general vibe: dark, bassy, abstract, masculine, chaotic, phonky, fast-paced

song association: RAVE — Dxrk ダーク

there are no lyrics in this song

song association: JUDGEMENT NIGHT — HEALTH, Ghostemane

All I gave is a fuck but now don't wanna fuck up again. Don't wanna pretend that I can't demand my place, stay safe. Motherfucker wishing again the world coming and none of us think about making sense. The only way nobody comes is threaten shit up my nose. And Lord knows, and I don't want it to give me hope, and God is a no-show, God is a no-show, GOD IS A NO-SHOW

[voyageviolet]

There’s one other significant factor that contributes to the distinctive nature of autistic embodiment: the same cortical hyperconnectivity that causes incoming signals to ripple across neural pathways, producing the chaotic intensity of autistic sensory experience, also affects the outgoing signals that the brain sends to the rest of the body when one performs any physical action. This creates interference with the smooth execution of intended actions, a phenomenon known as dyspraxia.

Like sensory sensitivity, synesthesia, or any other autistic trait, dyspraxia manifests differently and to differing (and often fluctuating) degrees in each autistic individual. In some, it’s noticeable only as a certain physical awkwardness, an odd gait, a slowness at picking up new motor skills. In others, there’s extreme impairment of motor skills, sometimes including speech. (One of the more damaging non-autistic social prejudices impacting the autistic community is the unfortunately commonplace tendency to equate oral speech with intelligence. Autistics who are unable to speak due to dyspraxia are frequently dismissed as lacking in basic intelligence and self-awareness, and denied respect and self-determination, despite the fact that a growing number of non-speaking autistics who spent their early lives being similarly dismissed have proven to be eloquent and insightful when given the opportunity to learn to communicate through typing or other assistive technologies.)

-“Somatics and Autistic Embodiment,” by Nick Walker. Compiled in Diverse Bodies, Diverse Practices: Toward an Inclusive Somatics. Emphasis mine.