#mom says it's my turn to use the holopad

[zaffur]

Work in progress.

[lynn-writes-things]

One Last Goodbye

A/N: For the sake of story, Fives is still alive and knows Echo is with The Bad Batch - they get peace too. Also this is pre TBB show cause I want everyone to be alive and well. More notes at the end

This day had been coming for some time now.

You knew it, your boys all knew it. The time had finally come. Despite this day creeping closer and closer, that didn’t make it easier. And you knew that despite them having time to prepare, it wasn’t easy on any of them either.

You’d all been staying in a small village, on one last job. Cody had been sure to make it a good one, since he knew it’d be your last, he’d even gone to the lengths of securing you all shelter off of the ship. The boys had helped you move most of your things off of it already, since you’d be staying on this planet for at least a while. It was small enough to be secure until you figured out something else. But for now, it was a good option for you.

But that didn’t make it easier.

This might’ve been the most difficult decision you’ve ever made.

But it was time, and you knew it. You just couldn’t keep up anymore, and you couldn’t risk your boys suffering because of your decline. That’s part of being a good soldier, is knowing when to call it quits before you end up dying, or having those close to you die, as a result of your stubbornness.

It just wasn’t a risk that you were willing to take.

But now, as you stand alone on the Marauder, your last bag over your shoulder, just.. Taking everything in for the last time. It really hit you.

This was it.

The tears began falling, and you felt a hand come to rest on your shoulder - a strong hand, one that always comforted you. Wordlessly, you turned, burying your face into Hunter’s armorless chest. He didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around you in return, holding you close.

Though you didn’t see them, you felt the presence of the others standing behind him. Rex had even taken it upon himself to request a special assignment for himself, Fives, Kix, and Jesse. They wanted to be here to say goodbye as well.

“You don’t have to go.” Hunter said, only half-joking. He understood your reasons for your “retirement”, and he agreed that it’d be the best option.

“I wish that were the case.” You chuckled, pulling away and wiping the last of your tears. You needed to hold it together.

“We’ll come visit you!” Wrecker chimed in, clearly trying to hold it together himself. “Any chance we get!”

“He’s right. You’ll always be one of us.” Tech agreed.

“And we don’t abandon each other.” Crosshair spoke up. (I’M SORRY)

“We’ll always just be a call away.” Echo added, tapping his comm with a forced smile.

“That goes for us, too!” Rex jumped in. “Though we can’t just be there as easily - but I can always try and pull some strings with General Skywalker.”

“Thank you guys.” You smiled, the first genuine one you’d had all day. “Really. I don’t know what I’m gonna do without you all.”

“I don’t know what we’re gonna do without your cooking!” Wrecker joked. “You remember when you first started with us, how you went full mom-mode?”

“Yeah, you won all of us over with those cooking skills of yours.” Hunter joined in, giving your shoulder an affectionate shove.

“Yeah, I remember.” You chuckled, remembering the fond memories.

“Remember the snowball fight on Hoth?” Echo brought up, resulting in a groan from Tech.

“I’ve tried to forget.” He snided, albeit jokingly, earning a light shove from his brother.

“Aw, come on, you had fun and you know it!” Wrecker teased.

“And I’m never gonna forget the lengths you guys went to for celebrating my birthday.” You brought up.

“We’ll have to track you down for it again this year. Make it a yearly gathering.” Hunter smiled down at you.

“I’ve already added it into our data bank!” Tech chimed in, waving his holopad for emphasis.

“You guys don’t have to-”

“Aye, can you forward that to us?” Fives asked. “I’d never pass up a chance to have some drunken shenanigans with Y/N.” He joked with a wink in your direction, causing you to roll your eyes despite the smile that was burning your cheeks. Jesse gave him a shove for the comment.

“Don’t be an idiot.” He scolded lightheartedly.

“What? I’m serious!”

“You drinking around Y/N again is the last thing you need to do.” Rex groaned. “But please do forward it though, Tech. We’d love to join in on the celebrating.” He said more seriously, to which Tech agreed, already getting to work on doing so.

“Oh! Oh! And all the fun times at 79’s!” Wrecker called out.

“That di’kut of Cody’s wouldn’t’ve stood a chance.” You laughed, recalling one of the few memories you actually had from that night.

“Personally, I’ll never forget around the time we were first getting to know each other and you did finger guns at me and panicked.” Rex laughed at the memory.

“You’re the one who accused me of mocking you for doing it, that’s why I panicked!” You retorted, laughing as well.

“Or when you were on assignment with us and I caught you with that snack you weren’t supposed to have.” He teased.

“What? You guys were sneaking snacks?!” Jesse asked, clearly upset that he wasn’t let-in on the snacks. “Why wouldn’t you tell me?! I can’t stand the rations!”

“Gar partaylir any be te Mando'a Ni taught gar?” (You remember any of the Mando’a I taught you?) Kix asked with a smirk and quirked brow.

“Uh.. Ni partaylir some!” (I remember some!) You replied, only vaguely confident. The boys all chuckled a bit, it had been a sweet gesture for you to try and learn on their behalf.

You all continued swapping stories and reliving memories for awhile, until The Batch got a comm from Cody - a gentle reminder that they’ll have to leave ASAP to get back in time. A few moments later, Rex got a similar comm.

“Well..” You cleared your throat, fighting off the tears once again.

“Well..” Hunter repeated, flashing you a sad look.

“Well…” Rex repeated as well. You couldn’t help but chuckle, a few tears slipping through your defenses.

“Guess this is it?” You said, trying to force your voice to remain steady. You just needed to hold it together until you were alone, wanting the last memory you’d have with them all for a while to be a good one. One last happy memory for the road.

“Guess it is.” Hunter sighed. Everyone was giving you the same look - sad eyes, forced small smiles, clearly trying their best to be strong for your sake. You were doing the same, of course, only less successfully.

“I’m really gonna miss you guys, you know that? Be sure to visit when you can, alright?” Your voice began wavering.

“We will. You can count on us.” Tech replied, everyone giving a short nod of agreement.

“Aw, c’mere!” Wrecker exclaimed, pushing the others aside and enveloping you in a tight hug - so tight that you feared you might break, but you sure as hell weren’t going to complain.

“Wrecker, you’re gonna break the poor girl.” Crosshair scolded. The bigger man let you go, only for the sniper to take his place. One by one, everyone gave you a hug, damn near as tight as they all could manage.

“Alright, if we don’t say goodbye now, I don’t think I’ll be able to do it.” You half-joked through your tears.

“Cody’s gonna have our asses if we don’t get a move on anyways.” Hunter said, to which Rex agreed.

“Thank you all - for everything. For making me feel like I’m part of the squads.”

“You are, part of both of ours. Always will be, too.” Jesse spoke up, everyone agreeing.

“Thank you.” You smiled. Taking one last, long look around the Marauder - and one last look at all of your boys, you inhaled deeply and made your way off of the ship, followed by the 501st boys. They stood in the hatch of their ship, your Batch standing in the hatch of theirs.

“Take care of yourself, Y/N.” Hunter said with a small smile.

“Right back ‘atcha, boys.” You responded in kind.

“Don’t hesitate to give us a call!” Echo piped up from behind him.

“Us too!” Fives called out. You chuckled.

“Don’t worry, you’ll all be hearing from me. I can’t just cut ties for good, now can I?”

“You’d better not.” Crosshair said.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, don’t worry.”

Another comm came through to both parties, and they all tensed.

This is it.

“We’ll being seeing you, Y/N.” Hunter said, nodding for Tech to be ready to hit the hatch.

“We’ll see you around.” Rex added, gesturing for Kix to do the same to their hatch.

“I’ll see you all later, boys.” You said to both parties. Suddenly, both squads stood in a salute, and you did the same. That was what shattered you, though you continued trying to hold it all back for the time being. Both buttons were hit, raising both hatches - though the shared solutes remained until the very last second. Before long, they were both getting ready to take off, and you waved goodbye until they were both gone.

Finally, you went back to your little hut, shut the door, and let all of the tears you were holding back finally fall - only left with the trinkets you’d gathered with both squads, and the fond memories that you held dear.

That was it.

One last goodbye.

A/N: Thank you, each and every one of you, for sticking with me and being a part of this crazy journey. It’s been awhile, and I think it’s time I turn in the towel. I might be back one day - it’s real possible. But for now, this is goodbye.

I’ve had a blast on this blog, and I thank you all so very much for making all of this possible. Thank you all for the love you’ve shown me since I started this blog. It’s fucking insane that it’s hit 1,000 followers - thank you all SO much.

If you guys want to stick with me, you can find me on twitter at @chaoticgaysnail

If any of y’all are into danganronpa, I’ve just started a new blog to write for that fandom, since I’m very hyperfixated on it right now, you can find that here.

Thank you all, each and every one of you.

Thank you so much.

-Lynn

[crab-instruments]

Dust in the Wind Part 7 (tbb)

Master <Part 6 Part 8>

Pairing: Hunter x Secret Jedi! Reader (GN)

Rating and warning: General audience, feelings

Words: 1.1k

a/n: On this episode of the Baddy Bunch, we get real deep and talk about stuff. It's that one episode the writers snuck in to have something different. Nothing happens, so I wanted to post it now.

The ship was quiet on the way back to Ord Mantell, everyone but you and Tech sleeping in their bunks. Tech sat in the pilot seat, you in the seat next to him. You found yourself here a lot during the journeys you took with the Batch; the expanse of hyperspace gave you solace. Even though you weren’t in trouble, per say, you were left with a feeling of uneasiness after the day’s events. You sensed it course through your body, using your veins and nerves to keep you awake. It was loudest in your brain, your thoughts unrelenting. You felt as if you needed to do something but nothing you could do would actually comfort you, solve the problem you seemed to have. You had your knees to your chest and your chin resting on them, in a tight wad of anxious, humming energy.

It was a relaxed silence in the cockpit, at least, with neither you nor Tech feeling the need to say anything. He focused on the holopad in his hands intently. You almost asked a few times what held his attention so tightly, more just for conversation than in an interest in the subject. Tech’s info dumping was something you found endearing. Having such passion in different subjects, enough to be overfilled with knowledge and then wanting to share it with others, it was obvious to you Tech shared his excitement with those he kept close to show he loved them. You’d never say that to him, though, he either already knew that or he would figure it out one day.

Echo’s voice cut through your thoughts, “Tech, you can go to sleep now, and I’ll take watch.”

Without so much of a movement, Tech replied to his brother. “I will in a few, I want to check all the files in this database first. You can go back to sleep, and I’ll wake you up when I’m done.”

Echo chuckled. “Yeah, sure, so you can fall asleep right there and I get in trouble for not taking my shift. Do you just like sleeping in the pilot seat?” At the accusation, Tech turned in his seat to face his brother, finally removing his eyes from the holopad.

“That has only happened three ti—” “Four.” “Four times yet you refuse to let it go. I’ll be done in a moment, sit down.”

Seeing the boys bicker brought a smile to your face and you loosened your grip on your legs. This really was a family, and you made the right decision in protecting this home, if only they could have moments like this.

“So, Maxis,” Echo switched his attention to you while taking a seat in the chair behind Tech, “you were a part of the GAR at one point?” I was wrong, I made a mistake, I should have run away.

You hummed in response, not wanting to give specific details. You did notice; however, Tech’s hands had stopped fiddling with the holopad, and his eyes seemed to be focused on you.

“What did you do, exactly? The army was big so it’s not likely we would have run into each other but—”

“We couldn’t have,” you shook your head.

“How are you so sure?”

“I… left not long after the Clone Wars started.”

Tech seemed to have decided something and went back to searching. Echo, on the other hand, had gone quiet for a moment to take in what you just said.

“You left? Why, if I may ask?”

Running your hand through your hair, you stared forward back at hyperspace. “I didn’t agree with how the Clone Army was being used, living beings made to be expendable. Disposable lives used to keep those in power safe to make decisions that will never affect them. It went against what the Or—… what the Grand Republic stood for. I did my best to push against the grain, treat each Clone— each soldier as an individual. But… it became too much.”

Your confession hung heavy in the air, the uneasiness settling back in like a thick fog.

“We were trained to fight and were honored to give our lives for the Republic.” Yeah, but that’s how you were raised, your life was taken from you. Didn’t know any different.

“Programmed.” Tech still has his attention on the holopad. “We saw that especially with Order 66.”

Order 66… is that what they called the Purge?

“How did you…”

“Not kill every Jedi on sight? Not join the Empire?” Echo finished for you. “The event that… turned me part droid… damaged the chip they put in us. For the rest of the Batch, they were just too annoying to follow orders.” Echo had such a way in changing the mood.

“Actually,” you didn’t have to look, but Tech held one finger up to make his point, “our mutations made the order ineffective, the same desirable mutations that allow us to disobey orders. Well, except Crosshair for a bit.”

“Yeah, yeah, same thing.”

You looked at Tech. “Wait. Mutations? I knew you were… different… but…”

“Yes, each original member of the Batch has an enhanced skill. I collect and digest knowledge faster than any, Wrecker is incredibly strong and good with explosives, Crosshair is the most accurate sharpshooter and marksmen you’ll ever meet—”

“What about Hunter?” Your enthusiastic curiosity got the better of you, which did not go unnoticed by the two Clones. Echo had a slight knowing smirk cross his face, which you did not appreciate what that could lead to.

“As I was saying, Hunter can track anything using his enhanced senses.” As the knowledge sank in, all the bits and pieces about how Hunter knew things made sense.

Kriffing stars. You couldn’t stop the pout on your face as you realized why it was hard to keep things from Hunter.

“Omega never had a chip, but she is a different type of clone.”

“Putting that all together, the seven of you make a real wacky family traveling the galaxy in a beat-up ship. Could make for a great holoshow,” you said with a slight smile.

Echo stood up. “But don’t forget the mysterious rogue mechanic who hid in the ‘fresher. It’ll make for a great story arc,” the smirk on his face was back, but softer. “Tech, go to bed. Maxis, you can take my bunk since it’s free. You really should sleep on something that isn’t a chair, especially since you exerted yourself today. Otherwise, you’ll really regret it.”

You stood up and gave an exaggerated salute before turning on your heels to the bunks, no point in arguing with mom. He rolled his eyes, understanding the joke you were making but was happy you weren’t putting up a fight like you had previously. Tech followed closely behind.

Part 8

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[cl-01-kestis]

Caf

Dismay - Grand Admiral Thrawn x Rebel!Reader | Part 9

Summary: As you adjust to living with Thrawn from now on, you share some of your memories of your birth and the things he missed out on.

Warnings: a detailed description of Thrawn’s morning routine lmao, menstruation, pretty long chapter

It was dark, cold but somehow warm in the place where you were lying. This felt much different compared to the prison floors, instead of hard concrete you were lying on fresh, cotton sheets, and a mattress that made you believe you were sleeping on a cloud. You shifted with your eyes still closed, your consciousness and awareness returning to you and making you realise that you were inside Thrawn’s chambers.

You remember the small incident that took place before you fell unconscious, you weren’t quick to forget that Thrawn specifically told you he’d take you to his chambers so you didn’t suffer Pryce’s punishments, you were grateful for that.

Opening your eyes, you realised it was dark, very dark. For seconds, you saw nothing but pitch black but soon your sight adjusted to the dark surroundings and you turned your head around to see a window, the Lothal moon shining through and giving the room a bit of light for you to see where you were sleeping at. You turned your head back around and jumped slightly when you realised you were lying a meter away from Thrawn, who’s back was turned to you as his body lay almost at the edge of the bed. For a minute you stayed put, looking at the back of his head and noticing some long strands that needed cut. He was wearing a white vest from what you could see, the rest of his body covered up by the thick quilt which you were also lying under.

From where you were lying, you could feel Thrawn’s body heat. You, right now, were freezing cold. Your top half wasn’t covered by the quilt and you were cold as you shifted in your position.

Sitting up, you very carefully and silently removed your jacket whilst moving your feet, coming to the realisation that Thrawn had taken off your shoes. You smiled, feeling the cool air of the chamber hit your bare arms and neck and sending a ray of shivers over your skin. Wincing, you returned to your spot underneath the covers and wiggled yourself closer to Thrawn without waking him up, keeping your arms and legs to yourself but trying to get as much warmth as you could.

You closed your eyes once more, shivering slightly due to your lack of body heat and trying to warm yourself up by rubbing your hands together quietly, breathing hot air on your fingers and letting out a tired yawn. You sighed, head against the pillow and limbs achy as you let out another yawn.

As you were about to drift off to sleep once more, the man lying beside you turned his head very slightly and noticed that you had moved closer to him. He’d heard your shuffling but wasn’t sure what you were doing, he hoped you weren’t escaping if anything.

Thrawn looked at you from the side with a hidden smile, eventually shifting his position so he was facing you, your head level with his chest and hands cupped idly against your chest. The Chiss wrapped an arm around you and pulled himself close to you, tangling his legs with yours and using his other hand to cradle the back of your head against his chest. Still awake, you wrapped an arm around his waist and nestled into his touch, the corner of your lips curling up ever so slightly.

This felt like home to you in every possible way.

Thrawn felt your soft breath plush against the skin where his vest didn’t cover, slowly breathing and completely at peace as you dozed off back into sleep. Very delicately, not wanting to wake you up, he brushed his lips against your hair and planted a small kiss on your strands, closing his own eyes when he felt the familiar sting of exhaustion.

By the time it was the early morning, and Thrawn had to wake up, the two of you were tangled in each other. Your legs were locked with his, both of your arms engulfed him in a warm embrace and somehow you had shifted to lying on your back in your sleep, Thrawn’s head resting on your chest peacefully. The Chiss man woke up naturally before the alarm on his bedside table went off, he was quick to cancel the alarm before it woke you up. He didn’t want to disturb your sleep, you needed as much of it as possible.

Thrawn stayed for a moment longer after he turned off the alarm, his knuckles stroked your cheek as you slept and stayed completely still. He smiled, feeling his heart beat terribly fast inside his chest the more time he spent looking at your beautiful face.

With a silent huff, he pushed himself up from the messy bed and patted his palms on his knees, his eyes felt heavy even though he slept well. Rubbing his eyes, he finally stood up and walked out of the bedroom, peering over to his window and noticing that the sun was coming up. Quietly, he walked over to the window and pulled down the blinds so you wouldn’t be woken up by the sunlight.

Thrawn returned to the main office outside of the bedroom and yawned to himself, turning to a door opposite his chambers on the other side of the office, dragging his feet as he entered what appeared to be a small kitchen. Turning on the light, he prepared himself a Caf, and also made you one as well whilst he was at it. He remembered the way you liked your Caf, he never forgot. You always used to complain that his was too strong and he needed milk, the memory made him chuckle as he stirred some sugar into your Caf.

Walking back to his office, he propped himself down on his chair and pulled up his inbox on his holopad, checking if he received any urgent messages for missions he had to tend to. To his relief, there was nothing sent, only the emails that had been viewed already from the days before. He scrolled through the news in boredom, sipping elegantly at his Caf cup and blowing softly on the dark brown liquid, he didn’t want a burned lip at this time of the morning.

There was nothing exciting happening in the galaxy, only reports of rebels and the different wanted warrants that were up. Thrawn kept scrolling until he eventually landed on a current holo video tape from a very familiar face. His daughter.

“-been kidnapped by the Empire, I need help, anyone’s help, to get my mom back... please-“ And the message was quickly cut out by Imperial protocol, covering the message with a jurisdiction sign that prohibited the rest of the message from being played.

Thrawn sat in his chair for a few tense seconds, scratching the back of his head, and guilt started pouring through. He wanted to let Omani know you were safe and not being tortured in some interrogation dungeon, he wanted her to know he cared for you, just as much as he cared for her. You were his family, and he told you already, he wasn’t going to let the rules of the Empire stop him from protecting you both. He swore by it.

With a quiet sigh, he switched off his holopad and rubbed his hands over his face, pulling down his eye sockets slightly before frowning and standing up from his seat. He had to get ready for the day, it was already getting a bit tight for time.

Before Thrawn went for a shower in his refresher, he collected his clothes from the bedroom very quietly and also tried not to get distracted by your beautiful sleeping form. He admired you as you tossed in the messy sheets of his bed, your jacket off and chucked on the floor beside the bed and abandoned.

Usually, he would be much more quick than this. By the time he got in his refresher, he would’ve been getting his Admiral uniform on by now if it weren’t for the fact he was taking care of someone, and that someone was a person he loved very much.

Thrawn winced as he thought of his hidden feelings for you, scrubbing the shampoo through his strands of wet navy hair and ducking his head under the water to rinse it out. He hated this feeling, the feeling of denial and secrecy. For years he kept his feelings towards you bottled up and he never once let it slip that he wanted to be fully with you instead of sleeping with you and letting you stay, on the odd occasion, for the night.

You had a somewhat relationship whilst you were at the Empire, but there was never much exchange of any feelings, the two of you avoided saying the three words as much as you could because the both of you were afraid of rejection. But the fact you knew Thrawn for your entire life was proof and valid reason as to why you fell in love with him so quickly. If anything, you always had a thing for him even if he was years older than you. It wasn’t until the Empire that those feelings started mixing with lust, then everything went south.

Sighing, Thrawn kept his head under the water for a long minute, his eyes looking at the floor but they were unfocused. All he thought about was you, You plagued his mind constantly, and the interaction he had with you last night left a lingering sensation on his skin that he could still feel. Thrawn couldn’t deny it at this point, he missed you, so much. Holding you last night made him realise that he longed for your attention and company for so long, yours and no one else’s.

You were so important to him, and as a 47 year old man, he could honestly say that he loved you. Back when he was younger and more unfamiliar with the feeling of love, he saw it more as a negative than positive. He didn’t want to get distracted by his work, or having the fear of something happening to you and having his heart broken. But now, things were different. You were here, in his chambers on Lothal, protected, safe, and sleeping in his bed with little to no anxiety. Yes, you were inside an Imperial base, but no one knew you were in his chambers apart from Pryce and her men. He didn’t need anyone else knowing.

Thrawn got out of the shower with an empty expression, brushing his teeth at a quick pace and spitting out his toothpaste in the bathroom sink where the tap was turned on. After rinsing out his mouth to get rid of the foul taste of morning breath, Thrawn wrapped a towel around his waist tight and opened his refresher doors, a cheeky yawn escaping his lips as he stretched out his limbs and walked out into the office once more.

As he done that, the door to his chambers opened and you walked out in all your loveliness, but also tiredness. Messy hair, tired eyes, wobbly legs, and wearing the same clothes you had on yesterday. You rubbed your eyes, opening them up and immediately freezing up when you saw Thrawn wearing nothing but the white towel over his hips.

“Maker- I’m sorry” You spluttered, covering up your eyes with your hands and turning around to avoid the chances of peeking through your fingers and looking at Thrawn’s almost naked form.

The Chiss smirked, leaning on the side of his desk and folding his arms over his chest as he noticed how tired you looked. The sound of the shower had obviously woken you up, either that or you had just woken up naturally.

“Pardon me for making such a brash comment, but you’ve seen worse, Rcati” Thrawn’s cool voice called out to you in the tense silence. Rolling your eyes underneath your hands, you let out a long sigh and felt your cheeks glow with embarrassment. He was right, but now wasn’t the time to be talking about that stuff. You had literally woken up minutes ago and one of the first things you see is the near naked body of your past lover. Great.

“Fair point, but I’ve just woken up” You chuckle, avoiding staring at his body as much as you could as your hands covered him from your sight. Thrawn kept the smirk on his face, tilting his head to the side and raising a brow as you turned around to head to his kitchen, obviously needing a Caf. As you stepped into the kitchen, you uncovered your eyes and looked back at Thrawn, this time without a blush and more of a casual way.

“You prepared me Caf?” You asked with a smile, the corners of your lips widening as Thrawn nodded his head and took a sip of his own Caf. You headed into the kitchen and came back out with the Caf cup in your hands, a joyful expression on your pretty face. Thrawn couldn’t help but stare, he was in awe at the way you delicately sipped at the scolding hot liquid, flinching back quickly as you cringed as your lip got slightly burned. It was the smallest details he payed attention to, even the way the wrinkes on the outer corners of your eyes deepened as you narrowed your gaze. He loved that he was able to experience you in all your Grace once again, this time in person and instead of the blue buzz of the hologram.

“The refreshers free for you to use, I have to get dressed and attend the morning briefing so I might not be here when you come out” Thrawn spoke with an unmissable disappointed tone, but you didn’t mention anything about it.

“I’ll get some clothes for you, I’m not having you wearing those rags all the time” He leaned off from his desk and walked towards you as your back pressed against the arch of the kitchen door. You tensed, going in to sip your Caf but immediately freezing as Thrawn came up to you, looking down at you with his piercing fiery gaze, and smiled.

“These aren’t rags, you Imperials are just too pristine” You defended, looking down at your white T-shirt and khaki combat trousers which were far from rags. Either way, Thrawn’s smile widened and he shrugged, crossing his arms over his bare chest and making it nearly impossible for you not to stare. Desperately keeping your eyes glued to his, You sipped your Caf through a clenched jaw until Thrawn made his next move.

“Well it’s either the clothes I give you, or nudity, and I’m sure you don’t want the second one” He bit back a grin as your eyes widened at his words, a flustered state consuming you once again as you spluttered out a small ‘the first one’ with a hot face. You felt rather agitated though, it was barely 24 hours since you had been captured and Thrawn was already having a form of authority over you. It pissed you off but at the same time, it made you feel taken care of. Your independence was irritated.

“I’ll leave you to get dressed then, don’t let me hold you back” You murmured, finishing off your Caf and placing the cup in the kitchen sink before scurrying past Thrawn who was still standing against the door frame with a coy expression on his handsome face.

“Do you still keep the towels in the bathroom?” You asked quickly, turning around to him once more just as you were about to enter the refresher.

“Of course, and feel free to use one of my shirts if I’m not back in time with the clothes. Also, if anyone comes in, just stay in my bedroom with the door locked and wait until they leave” Thrawn explained, nodding to you curtly before walking across the office and back into his room, sending you one last smile before he closed the door to get dressed. You stood alone outside for a few seconds, your face hot and eyes burning at the image of Thrawn’s bare chest and his biceps.

It was too early to be thinking of this stuff, in terms of time, and the amount of time you had been reunited with him. You were moving too fast, barely a day ago he saved you from definite torture and now all of a sudden he’s shirtless and wearing nothing but a towel, good Lord.

You entered the refresher and locked the door, undressing yourself from your rebel clothes and leaving them in a pile on the black bathroom floor. This felt so foreign, but at the same time you had been in this room before, a long time ago, many many times. So you remembered how to navigate your way around his refresher, the shower was in the same place and so was the sink, the interior was all the same.

As you stepped inside the shower, you felt a flush of relief wash over you as the cold water glided over your skin. It was a bit of a shock at first, but you remembered that Thrawn always had a cold shower in the morning to wake himself up, which was a pretty smart move.

Adjusting to the temperature of the water coming from the riser-kit shower head, you drenched yourself completely before grabbing hold of the bottles beside you on a small shower shelf. You stayed in the shower for about 10 minutes, mostly thinking about the strange situation you were in and not so much washing yourself, but you at least scrubbed your body and the places that needed to be washed.

When you came out, you wrapped your head and body in two large towels, larger than the towel Thrawn had around his waist. You looked at yourself in the mirror, face flushed at the memorable images of the man you once you used to sleep with, and they weren’t leaving your head anytime soon. You heard nothing outside of the refresher door, either Thrawn was still getting dressed or he left, and it was certainly not the first option.

You hoped he would at least bring you a tooth brush, you couldn’t do anything but swish some mouth wash in your mouth to keep your teeth as clean as you could for the time being. You warily walked out of the refresher, it wasn’t as cold as it was when you woke up but that was due to the cold shower. Walking to Thrawn’s room, you made sure he wasn’t in there before taking a step inside, looking around and noticing he had made the bed and layed out a shirt for you to wear. Your feet lead you to the side of the bed, picking up a small note beside the shirt which read in Cheunh:

‘I don’t have anything that might fit your hips or legs, but I hope this does you well till I come back, you can borrow my briefs as well if you’re uncomfortable wearing nothing on your legs’

Smiling at the letter, you placed it on the bedside table and dropped the towel from your body, tensing at the cool air but quickly covering yourself with Thrawn’s black T-shirt which was rather baggy on you and draped down to your thigh. Taking his offer, you, without looking as much as you could, went through his drawer and took out a pair of black briefs for you to wear. Practically everything Thrawn wore apart from his admiral uniform was black, he had the same taste in fashion as he did 14 years ago, but it was mostly clothes to suit the Empire.

You had a lot of time to waste, especially if Thrawn was away getting you clothes and attending morning briefings. You knew how long those briefings took, so you didn’t need to worry about him turning up randomly any time soon.

Tip toeing around his office in his baggy shirt and briefs, and you sat in his chair, feeling the arm rests with your palms as you nuzzled into the comforting internal cushioning against your back. You looked at all the things he had collected over the years, Sabine’s spray paint art being one of the most noticeable things. You stood up from his chair, moving slowly towards all the things stacked neatly on shelves and figuring out where to start.

On the shelf in the middle which was level height with you, a fairly large bag sat slumped on the shelf, looking deflated and like a half sack of starfruit. You, curiously, pulled it off the shelf and sat on the ground with it in your arms. Setting it in front of you, you unzipped the bag, quick with anticipation as your fingers fumbled with the zipper. You looked inside the bag, eyes concentrating on multiple pieces of clothing, photos, small trinkets and notes.

All which belonged to you.

Gasping, you eagerly pulled out most of the thing from the bag, small trinkets spilling from your arms and falling beside you. You looked at the clothing in your arms, identifying it as your old Commander uniform. As surprised as you were, you set the uniform on the ground, grimacing as you wiped your hands against one another before returning your gaze to the stuff in front of you.

You picked up a few of the notes lying about, all of them spelt in Cheunh or Sy Bisti, so others couldn’t understand you apart from Thrawn. You wanted to stop reading but you didn’t, drinking in the words you forgot you wrote years ago and realising just how obvious you were about your emotions. There was all sorts you talked about in your letters, from Thrawn’s welfare, to you talking about your day. Passing notes was a sentimental thing to you and Thrawn, it always had been. Instead of sending each other holo messages, you would deliver small notes and slip them underneath each other’s doors. Passing notes was also a thing you done back on Csilla, when the two of you couldn’t see one another as much. You picked up a few things you remember you had left behind before you escaped the Empire, things like small hair clips to keep your hair in place and also a hairbrush.

Shifting your attention to a bunch of photos at the bottom of the bag, your hand instinctively reached out and picked the small pile up. Your eyes greedily looked over the photos, a cold sweat raising over your skin as your eyes peered over the faces of your parents. A photo which was at the front of the pile was of you and your family before you were sent off to the Royal Imperial Academy, your mother on your left and father on your right. You had just turned 25 when that photo was taken, hair luscious and full of colour and your face free of wrinkles.

You sat for a long time looking at the photo, no tears in your eyes due to how shocked you were. You didn’t expect Thrawn to keep photos of you and your parents for so long, he must’ve collected the things you left in your room after you disappeared. The thought of him doing that made you smile.

Placing everything back inside the bag, you stood up and moved it back on the shelf where you originally found it, trying to make it look untouched.

You pressed your palms firmly on your back and leaned back, scrunching your face up as small cracks erupted from your spine had made you sigh in relief. Unbelievably, you let out a tired yawn and rubbed your eyes, walking to the kitchen to get yourself another Caf as you bummed a soft tune to yourself. The Caf machine buzzed as it poured the bitter hot liquid into the cup you used before (and made sure to clean out before using again). You picked up a sashe of brown sugar and yawned once again as you stirred it into the full cup of Caf. Leaning your lower back onto the edge of the kitchen counter, you continued humming softly as you sipped carefully on the piping cup of freshly made Caf.

For a while it was quiet, not much noise apart from the birds chirping outside Thrawn’s chamber windows. You trailed outside of the small kitchen and walked back into Thrawn’s neat and tidy bedroom, Caf in hand and bare feet padding against the black floors of the chamber. The sun was now fully risen, and by the looks of it, the day at the Imperial factory had started. Your eyebrow twitched, looking at the tall towers of smoke and wishing you could destroy it all if you had the power.

As you hunched yourself up onto the windowsill, which was wide enough to take your weight, you brought a leg up and let the other dangle. You felt quite listless, looking at the factory of grey and feeling like the energy was draining from you. You wondered if Omani was okay, you at least hoped she wasn’t panicking to the point of a panic attack about your imprisonment. You wish you could tell her Thrawn was taking care of you.

Resting your head on the windowsill, the sound of the chamber door opening echoed in the distance and alerted you out of your relaxed state. Just as you were about to hide under Thrawn’s bed in case it was an Imperial officer, Thrawn came through and looked around before spotting you.

“Oh, sorry, I should’ve announced first that it was me” He smiled awkwardly, holding a pile of clothes that he set down on the bed before standing back up and holding his hands behind his back.

“Don’t worry, I’ve not been up to much” You yawned, cradling your cup of Caf and taking continuous sips of it as Thrawn walked over and looked out of the window with you, being careful not to get too close and make sure no physical contact was possible. You frowned a bit at his caution.

“I’m afraid the Empire doesn’t offer much leisure, but I’ve sent your device to be repaired, so hopefully you can get in touch with Omani” Thrawn stated, returning his gaze to you and feeling his chest tighten as you smiled, your eyes gleaming.

“Really?” You sounded in disbelief, but Thrawn simply smiled more and nodded his head.

“T-thank you” You felt yourself heat up in the face but you ducked your head before Thrawn got a chance to see anything.

“It’s not an issue, Rcati,” Thrawn bowed his head very slightly. “I hate to cut chatter short but I’ve got multiple messages coming in, can I trust you to keep yourself occupied whilst I’m working?” The Chiss asked, an eyebrow raised.

“I swear you still treat me like a 4 year old, I’m a grown woman. Just as long as no lousy officer comes through the door, then I’ll be fine” You chuckled. Thrawn grinned, nodding his head and saying nothing before turning around and making his way out of his bedroom. Watching him until he was out of sight, you returned your gaze to outside, your Caf cup clutched close to your chest as you let out a small sigh of emptiness. You should probably get some more rest.

Looking at Thrawn’s bed, you smiled to yourself before landing on the ground with a soft thud from the window will. Placing the Caf cup onto the bed side table, you sat down on the comfy quilt and got yourself underneath it, silently apologising to Thrawn for messing it up after he made it barely an hour ago. You fell asleep smiling, head smushed between two feather-light pillows and body limp underneath the covers, staying like that for a few hours.

-

When you woke back up, there was a horrible pain in your abdomen. You didn’t sit up, immediately recognising the pain and cursing to yourself in Cheunh before cranking your head up and opening your legs whilst still lying on your side. You let out an agitated sigh, carefully launching yourself up and off the bed whilst still regaining consciousness. Thankfully there was no blood on the sheets or mattress, thank the maker. But Thrawn’s boxers weren’t so lucky, they stuck to you and the moment you stood up, it was as if a pool of water erupted.

“Fuck” You groaned, holding a hand underneath your crotch to make sure no blood spilled on the floors as you waddled over to the chamber door and grabbed onto the arch. You looked around the corner, spotting Thrawn working at his usual office chair. A sharp pain stabbed its way through your womb and you let out a cry of distress, immediately alerting the working Chiss who snapped his head up and saw you crouching on the floor with a scrunched up expression.

“Rcati! Are you okay?” He stood up from his seat and walked over to you at a faster than usual pace, his eyes wide and searching all over to see what was wrong. You nodded your head, reaching out to him and pulling yourself up as you breathed in.

“Period, do you have any towels?” You asked awkwardly, mouth curling up slightly to try and diffuse Thrawn’s worry but he knew exactly what you were talking about and breathed out a sigh of relief.

“I thought you were having a heart attack” He frowned.

“I might as well with all this pain” You replied sharply, clutching onto his white uniform and returning your hand to underneath your crotch.

“I’ll have someone send something” Thrawn nodded, helping you over to the refresher politely and staying by the doorway as he commed someone to bring sanitary products without a single shadow of embarrassment. You know he would get questions, why would a man who lived alone want sanitary products? Either way, you felt flattered.

“Are you feeling alright?” Thrawn asked, his back turned to you as you removed the boxers from your legs and slipped them off, sitting down on the toilet just for support so you didn’t fall over.

“I’m fine, you don’t need to be so polite about my modesty, you’ve seen me in this position before” You chuckled, looking up at Thrawn who smiled before turning his head to look at you, at your face and nowhere else as you sat hunched over, so there was no chance of him seeing anything else.

“That’s true, and you give me a heart attack every time it happens” He rolled his eyes, arms folded over his chest as he smiled down at you. You winced quietly as another cramp hit you, clutching your knees and doing your best to stay quiet.

“I’ll get you some medicine” Thrawn suggested, but you knew you wouldn’t get a choice in what he done. If it was to do with your health care, he wouldn’t waste a moment to help you feel better. He still showed that.

Thrawn returned with a glass of water and two tablets, without hesitation you took a mouthful of water and swallowed the tablets into your system, hopeful that they at least ease the pain off for the time being.

“I’d be lying if I said this was the worst pain I’d ever felt” You commented, leaning your elbows on your knees and looking at your feet.

“What do you mean?” Thrawn asked curiously, crouching down to your level and sitting on the ground with his back against the archway of the door.

“Birth was 100x more painful than this” You explained, eyes going unfocused as you remembered visions from your time in the hospital ward on Yavin, Ahsoka by your side as well as rebels who were waiting outside in anticipation.

“Could you maybe tell me about it? If it’s okay” Thrawn asked curiously, tilting his head to the side as he looked at you with gleaming eyes. He was glowing.

“It’s a long story” You sigh.

“I’ve got time” He smiled, nodding his head to you which made you let out a silent laugh.

“Alright... well, I was in my room with my roommate at the time when my water broke, I put up with 13 hours of contractions after that before I got the chance to go to the hospital,” You frown slightly, scratching your knees for no reason.

“I can’t remember much apart from the time Omani arrived, all I can remember is the pain. But it was all worth it, even down to the tear I got after I pushed her out. Through all the stitches and anaesthetics, needles and cramps, and she was so beautiful” You felt yourself tearing up and your voice cracked slightly as you continued talking to Thrawn.

“She was a pretty heavy baby, she cried a lot, but as soon as i held her, it was as if a switch was flicked... it got so quiet, she just looked up at me and knew I was her mama, she even lifted her head up a few times” Your smile widened as a tear rolled down your cheek, but you quickly wiped it off and swallowed down your feelings as you looked back at Thrawn.

He was enchanted by you, eyes wide and mouth pulled into a smile. You felt joyful just looking at him but the familiar feeling of reality dawned on you once again when you almost forgot that you were on opposite sides and this type of peace wouldn’t last forever.

“What did your parents think?” Thrawn asked. Your smile dropped and for a second you were close to crying.

“They loved her” You said through a broken voice, wiping the corners of your eyes as your lip quivered. Thrawn’s smile seemed to fade as he watched you struggle to keep in your tears. Something was up.

“They only got to see her a few times though” You sniffed, hands shaking as you clutched your knees once more and breathed deeply.

“How so?” Thrawn frowned, looking as though he was trying to figure out the answer himself before hearing yours.

“They... died” Was all you said before falling completely silent, avoiding Thrawn’s shocked gaze as he opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. He was startled by your answer, but he didn’t keep in touch with his family therefor he wouldn’t have found out from them. But it was still unfortunate, your mother cared for Thrawn like he was her own at times and he respected her and your father a lot, almost more than his own parents.

“I’m so sorry” He sounded genuine and sincere, his tone comforted you because you knew he wasn’t saying it just to pity you. He knew them just as well as you, and you knew this came as a shock to him.

“It was a ship crash, 5 years after Omani was born. Neither of them were angry I ran away from the Empire, if anything they supported me with everything I did. They even visited the place I was living in to see their granddaughter,” You wiped a tear.

“Tell you something though, they were really surprised that Omani was Chiss, they asked me so many questions about who the father was... but they pieced it together themselves and my mom literally started crying” You allowed yourself to laugh, your tears brushing away as you cleared your throat and returned your sight to Thrawn who was blushing.

“She said to me ‘(Y/N), I had a dream this would happen, this baby is a true blessing to our family and his, it unifies us’” You spoke, wincing slightly as another cramp creeped up on you.

“She’s right” Thrawn spoke up after what seemed forever. “Our girl is a blessing, and I don’t care what side she’s on, rebel or not” Thrawn leaned forward, shuffling over to you and taking your hands with his as he looked up at you from his sitting position on the floor.

“You’ve given me a great gift, and a gift I never thought I’d have the privilege to have” He looked scared, not as in a bad way but rather a fear that he’s not yet had the chance to meet the gift he speaks of. You understood what he was feeling and turned your hands around to hold his securely.

“And you’ve given me this gift as well, Thrawn” You smile, looking down at him as his scarlet eyes flickered from your eyes to your lips. You weren’t close enough to kiss, but you could tell he was thinking about it.

Just as either of you were about to do anything, there was a buzzer at the door and you jumped out of your skin as soon as it went off.

Thrawn chuckled, standing up and brushing his hand against your cheek before walking out of the refresher and towards his door, opening it to see the deliverer who was sent to his chambers.

“Just as you requested Sir” They said sternly, almost fearfully. You sat on the toilet with not much thought, only listening into the conversation as the deliverer was dismissed and Thrawn closed the door, returning to you. Where he wanted to be the most.

[willow-salix]

(Fluffember prompt :Young - or as I'm calling it 'Scott being a complete shit for an hour)

Day 7 of Isolation on Tracy Island 2.0

It started with Gordon, which it generally does, but this time it actually wasn’t that bad, although I do think he was very brave to start things the way he did.

We were all lounging around in what Grandma 'affectionately’ refers to as our ‘melting ice cream’ poses. By this she means that we have effectively melted all over whatever we were sitting on, spreading ourselves out in an attempt to take up as much room as possible. I had been lying across both Gordon and John but now I was sitting between them while Scott sat in front of the couch between my legs as I tried out different hairstyles on him because, in my infinite wisdom, I’d decided he needed a new look. It wasn’t going well, he did not suit the Elvis look. Now I was attempting to brush it forward and up like Alan’s.

“Hey, John,” Gordon started, breaking the comfortable silence of the room. I couldn’t see John, since I was concentrating on the back of Scott’s head, but I could feel the power of his eyes roll as his concentration and peace was distrubed.

“Yes?” 

“Do you remember that game we used to play?”

“Which one? There were so many games that I’ve blocked most of them from my memory.”

“I mean the one you were actually good at.” 

Scott sniggered and I gently flicked the back of his head in punishment.

“Excuse me, I was very good at games and still am.”

I nodded supportively and received a gentle waist squeeze in thanks for my efforts. 

“I meant that one that you used to completely dominate us in,” Gordon continued. “I just can’t remember what it was.”

“Again, there were many games…”

“Scott, do you remember?” I asked, trying to head off a potential argument before it started.

“I’m trying to think of one that John was good at-” I flicked his head again, making him duck out of the way as he laughed.

“I’ve never been so insulted,” John gasped.

“Give them time,” I muttered, dragging Scott’s head back into place and attacking him with my brush again, fluffing up his hair by backcombing it, let him try to brush that out later…

“We used to play it on long journeys to pass the time,” Gordon continued, clearly frustrated that he couldn’t recall exactly what it was.

“Ask Virgil,” Scott suggested. “He might know.”

The chonky one was duly summoned, Alan coming in with him, Kayo trailing in behind.

“You comm’d?” Virgil greeted, sinking down into one of the launch seats.

“What was that game we used to play on journeys? The one John always beat us at,” Gordon asked, not bothering with the pleasantries of a hello. “When we were kids.”

“John played games?” Alan asked, completely dumbfounded.

“Hey!” John protested. “Why is everyone picking on me today?”

“Because you’re actually here?” Scott shrugged like that explained everything.

“You’re on your own,” John huffed, dragging me onto his lap and away from Scott, leaving him with my brush stuck in his hair. “Can’t be nice, you don’t get my wife. That’s the rule.”

Virgil, who had been pretty quiet the entire time, finally spoke. “I went to the park.”

“You what now?” I asked. Had he finally cracked? We weren’t allowed to go anywhere, no unnecessary journeys, and I doubted that leaving the island to go to a park counted as necessary. 

“That was the game,” he explained patiently. “Someone would start and say ‘I went to the park’ or wherever it was we were going that day.”

“Oh, yeah, now I remember!” Gordon cheered. 

“You made a game out of saying where you were going?” I asked, completely bemused. It seemed like a pretty rubbish game if you asked me.

“No, we said what we were taking,” Virgil replied.

“Am I being dumb here?” I really didn’t get it. What were they talking about? “Surely if you were going somewhere you would have to take things with you, that’s not a game, that’s just sensible.”

“No,” Gordon laughed, finding my dumbness sooooo amusing. “It’s a game.”

“I don’t get it either,” Alan said quietly. “I never played that, we never really went anywhere when I was younger.”

“It was a game that Mom used to play when she was little, her dad used to start it to stop them being bored while driving,” Scott told us as he wrestled the brush out of what was now his fringe, leaving it sticking up at the front like a poodle’s.

“I’ll start,” Gordon offered, thinking for a second before he spoke again. “I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod...an alligator.”

Everyone burst out laughing, both at his object but also the fact that he’d changed it to a rescue.

“Scott, your turn,” Gordon said.

“I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator and a baseball bat,” he said after a moment of thought. “If that alligator starts any trouble, I’ll finish it.”

“Sounds legit,” I whispered to John who smirked in response.

“I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat and a corned beef sandwich,” Virgil continued, taking up the reins of the game.

“Oh, I get it!” Alan grinned, catching on. “You have to remember what everyone else is taking and add your own! Can I play?”

“Of course you can,” Scott said.

“OK, OK, I’ve got this,” Alan paused as he thought about it. “I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich and a didgeridoo! John, your turn.”

“I’ll kick all your butts, you wait,” John warned them, then quickly rattled off the items followed by his own.  “I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich, a didgeridoo and an ephemeris.”

“Oh, so you’re playing that move again, are you?” Scott snorted. “Sneaky. This is why he always won, he’s not smarter, he just knows weird words.”

“I resent that, I’m much smarter than you.”

“Kayo? Are you playing?” Virgil asked, trying to keep the peace.

“Sure,” she shrugged, not having anything better to do. “I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich, a didgeridoo, an ephemeris and flight goggles.”

Gordon nudged me. “Your turn.” 

“No way,” I protested, shaking my head. “I’m useless at games like this, I have the memory of a goldfish with amnesia.”

“You aren’t that bad,” John said, trying to defend me. I appreciated the effort but I knew he was lying.

“Babe, I’m the one that forgot where I put my phone and started looking for it before I realised I was talking to you on it.”

“Well, there is that.”  Cue the sniggers from the peanut gallery. 

“I appreciate the fact that you didn’t laugh at me when you asked me what I was looking for, so thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“No, you have to join in, we won’t laugh, we promise,” Alan assured me. I’m not sure I believed it possible for them not to laugh at me, but there was a first time for everything I supposed.

“OK, I’ll try,” I sighed. “Let me think...I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat… something about a sandwich…” my brain protested the sudden workout. “ Corned beef,” I yelled triumphantly and continued. “A didgeridoo, a...effie...something that John said, and Kayo’s flight goggles. There, done.” I smiled proudly. “I remembered.”

“Good job,” Scott grinned. He didn’t actually laugh but I kicked him gently as a warning.

“You didn’t add your item,” Gordon reminded me. “You have G.”

“Oh, yeah..erm…a g…” brain fart. I had nothing. John whispered in my ear and I happily shouted it out. “Gyroscope.”

“Hey, no helping, that’s cheating,” Alan protested, clearly enjoying himself.

“Fine, grapes, I’m taking grapes, if Virgil can take corned beef I can take that.”

“You can take your grapes,” Gordon agreed, narrowing his eyes at John who stared back innocently. “I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich, a didgeridoo, an ephemeris, flight goggles, grapes and a holopad in case I get bored.”

“I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich, a didgeridoo, an ephemeris, flight goggles, grapes, a holopad and an icepick,” Scott continued.

“I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich, a didgeridoo, an ephemeris, flight goggles, grapes, a holopad, an icepick and a jackhammer," Virgil said. 

“I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich, a didgeridoo, an ephemeris, flight goggles, grapes, a holopad, an icepick, a jackhammer and…a kayak!" Alan yelled as he thought of an appropriate word. 

“I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich, a didgeridoo, an ephemeris, flight goggles, grapes, a holopad, an icepick, a jackhammer, a kayak and a llama," John continued. 

"Why would you take a llama?" Gordon asked. 

"So it can spit at people that get too close," John shrugged. 

"I went on a rescue and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a corned beef sandwich, a didgeridoo, an ephemeris, flight goggles, grapes, a holopad, an icepick, a jackhammer, a kayak, a llama and a machete," Kayo said, adding her to the list. 

"Why are you all so aggressive in your packing? I asked. 

"Always be prepared," Kayo quoted. "Your turn."

"I went on a rescue," I sighed, not in the least happy with my involvement, "and I packed in the pod an alligator, a baseball bat, a didgeridoo, A John thing," I got a little kiss for that, why I don't know, maybe just because he felt sorry for me. "Goggles, an ice cube, tablet, the llama and that machete that miss violence is taking to probably smack people with," I finished up. 

"Well, you did miss a few," Alan admitted, "sorry."

"Does that mean I'm out?" 

They all nodded sadly but I was secretly pleased. I mean, I did my best but yeah, not my kind of game. I settled back against John, more than ready to be a casual observer, that was much more my style. 

Gordon was out next, then Scott, followed by Virgil, with Alan, Kayo and John fighting it out for the title. They were on their second round of alphabet and had hit 'E' when Alan lost his train of thought. 

Kayo added keeper, the loop on a belt that the end tucks into but John threw out a Snellen Chart, the thing you had to look at in the doctors surgery decades ago, where he dredged that word up from I can only guess. I'm pretty sure he's got a box up in his brain that is just full of useless facts, weird words and probably the eleven times table or something. 

He won. He's sitting very smugly, having proved his point and retained his crown.

"See, I can play games," John grinned. 

"That was really fun," Alan said with a happy little sigh. "I sometimes feel like I missed out on a lot of the things you guys did before we lost Mom."

"Well, we've got plenty of time now to remember them all and tell you all about them," Scott promised him, ruffling his hair as he passed by, making Alan yelp and hurriedly smooth it back down again.

"Three…two…" I started, waiting.

"What did you do!?" Scott yelled from somewhere in the kitchen, there were many reflective surfaces in there.

"One," John finished for me. "Want to come with me to check on EOS?"

"Probably wise," I agreed, hauling myself up from the comfort of his lap. "Let's make it quick, before Scott finishes fixing the mess I made of his hair and comes seeking revenge."

[wonderlandleighleigh]

Valentines #4

This got long.

If there’s one thing Han Solo is good at, it’s crime. 

And he likes crime. He’s always liked crime. The danger. The control. The insanity of it. 

But what he really enjoys? 

Crime with purpose. 

Chewie rumbles at him as they land at the former Imperial Center. 

“Yeah, I see it, Chewie,” Han confirms. “This place is a ghost town.” 

And it is. There are a few people here and there, but it’s nothing like the busy city/planet Han remembers from his academy days, or the stories Leia would tell about being there for diplomatic events.

The Empire fell, and then fled, it seems. 

‘Good,’ Han thinks. ‘Leaves room for the people who actually lived here once upon a time, and weren’t just Imperial shavit.’ 

Once they land, it’s not terribly hard to find what they’re looking for, because it’s…

Well it’s just about the weirdest thing Han’s ever seen, and two weeks ago, he was nearly eaten by teddy bears.

But as they step into the dark, chilly apartment building and head to the top floor, they don’t find a door, so much as...a face. 

A giant, carved face of a woman who almost looks like Leia, but kind of doesn’t. 

Chewie growls, wondering if they should shoot it open, and Han frowns, troubled. 

“Feels kinda weird to,” He says. “That’s Leia’s mom’s face. But can we also just...y’know. Talk briefly about just how unsettling it is that Vader had this made?” 

Chewie chuckles and comments that perhaps Vader made it himself. 

“Oh, yeah, Pal,” Han laughs. “Vader. A set of paints. Little lazer carver. Some smooth jazz in the background. That’s probably exactly what happened.” 

Chewie laughs out loud this time. 

Han huffs and inspects the face, looking for something - anything - that will open it. “You know,” he says to Chewie as he keeps looking. “I feel like our lives were not this weird before we met Luke and Leia.” 

Chewie shakes his head and rolls his eyes. Yes they were, he reminds Han. 

“Fine. So we just attract weird, then,” Han shrugs and huffs, before stopping as he finds a button. “HEY! Got it!” He presses it and then stumbles out of the way as the doors creak open, splitting the head in two. “Yep. Deeeefinitely weird.” 

The apartment inside is dark, and as chilly as the rest of the building, with an added layer of dust to go with it, but it looks mostly untouched. Luxurious, now-antique furniture sits forgotten, as do the little trinkets around the space. 

“Well,” Han mutters. “Here we are.” 

***** 

“There was just too much stuff,” Han explains as he holds Leia’s hand, leading her up the lift and to the apartment. “I didn’t know what to grab for you, so I figured I’d...y’know. I’d bring you here, and you could...I don’t know. Maybe this was a bad idea.” 

Leia watches him as they round the corner. “Han, the fact that you thought to come here at all is amazing. How do you even know this was here?” 

“Friend of a friend of an enemy of a friend,” Han shrugs as he stops in front of the carved face. 

Leia stares at it, brown eyes wide.

Han takes a breath. “Y’know. Maybe I shouldn’ta brought you here. No, yeah, we should go. This was a bad idea.” 

She shakes her and pulls on his hand, keeping him in place. “It’s just- strange. To be looking at her like this.” 

“Yeah,” Han agrees. “Here, lemme open it.” 

He does, and as the face shifts apart, Leia takes a deep breath, before stepping inside, taking it all in. 

She feels Han step up behind her and turns to kiss his cheek. “Give me a few minutes?” 

He nods, even as he looks concerned. “Sure, Leia. I’ll be right outside.” 

She nods and watches him go, before turning back to the lifeless, dusty space.

She takes her time, walking around, touching furniture and nicknacks, gazing at holo photos, and out at the balcony. 

“I wonder what it was like for you,” Leia says softly. “Watching the Republic fall...watching your life crumble around you.” 

She gets no answer, of course. All is quiet, except for Han’s soft voice, obviously talking to someone on his comm outside. 

She sighs and keeps looking around...the refresher and the bedroom...the small kitchen...It must have been a beautiful place to live in its time, and she wonders if she should even bother taking anything. 

“Maybe I should just leave this place as it is,” she mutters. “I didn’t even know her.” 

Despite the dust, Leia settles onto the large couch, taking in the silence and the gazing around the sitting area, her eyes lingering on details she hadn’t noticed when she first walked in; a pair of ornate shoes by the bedroom door...a tiny, stuffed crystal fox on the edge of the couch (perhaps a gift for Leia or Luke once they were born)...

Leia’s eyes drift to the balcony, and she squints when she realizes there’s someone standing there. She rises quickly. “Han?” she wonders softly. “How did you-” 

When she steps out, she stops in her tracks. 

The man doesn’t turn to greet her, and she knows from the Jedi robes and the thick, dark blonde hair that glows a strange blue, that this is not a living, breathing person.

Leia swallows hard and steps back. “What are you doing here? What do you want?” 

He turns finally, handsome face giving her a sad grin. “I was waiting for someone.” 

“Me?” 

Anakin Skywalker’s grin turns guilty. “Well...no. But I am glad to see you, Leia.” 

“Well I’m not glad to see you,” she snaps. 

He nods. “Yeah, I deserve that.” 

Leia snorts. “You deserve a lot of things.” 

“I know.” 

“And you shouldn’t be here,” Leia adds quickly. “You don’t deserve to be here with her things.” 

Anakin nods. “I know. That’s why I sealed this place up. I was Vader so I did it in the most twisted way possible, but believe me. I’m aware that I don’t deserve to be anywhere near anything that reminds me of her.” 

She stops at that. She’d been so ready for a fight. So ready for him to argue his place here. “Well. Good. Then...you should go.” 

“I’m waiting for someone,” he repeats. 

“There’s nobody coming,” Leia tells him. “No one has been here in decades.” 

“Well...one person has,” Anakin corrects her. “In a manner of speaking.” 

He looks back into the apartment, and Leia follows his gaze as a petite woman with dark hair in a beautiful, glittery blue gown rushes around. 

Leia stares, wide-eyed. “How…?” 

Anakin smiles at her. “The Force is a funny thing sometimes. Well...most times. If a feeling is strong enough it’ll leave an impression...an echo in the physical world.” 

“That’s…” 

“You’re mother,” Anakin nods. “An echo of her.” 

Leia watches breathlessly as Padme Amidala moves around quickly, picking up a holopad and reading something before setting it down and then checking her hair in a dusty mirror as if everything is normal. 

“Ani!” she calls. “Ani, if we don’t hurry, we’ll be late.” 

Anakin grins at Leia. “That’s my cue.” 

Leia watches as Anakin steps past her and back into the apartment, normal as anything. 

“I don’t see why we have to go,” he says. 

“Because you promised you would be my escort tonight,” Padme reminds him. “And it’s one of the few times we get to go out like this without anyone suspecting anything. With Obi-Wan escorting Duchess Satine for protection, it makes sense for me to come with protection as well.” 

“Yes, I’m sure Obi-Wan will protect the Duchess right into a dark corner,” he jokes. “I can protect you just fine here at home,” Anakin takes her hand, tugging her close. 

Padme giggles. “Ani. Come on.” 

He sighs and nods. “Oh, alright,” he says softly. 

Leia watches as the mood shifts, and Padme obviously notices it too. 

“Anakin, what’s wrong?” she asks, cupping his face. 

“Nothing,” he tells her. “I just miss you when we’re not together.” 

Padme sighs softly. “I miss you too...you know, maybe we should stay in.” 

“No, you wanted to go,” Anakin argues with a chuckle. “You got all dressed up and everything, and people will be expecting us...but if we could sneak out early…” 

She giggles and leans in for a light kiss. “It’s a deal.” 

Anakin watches as she pulls away and heads for the door, disappearing in front of their eyes as if she were never there at all. 

Leia steps back into the apartment, looking around before turning back to her father. “I…” 

“I have to go,” Anakin tells her with a sad grin. “She’s waiting for me, after all.” 

“She wasn’t Force sensitive,” Leia points out. “How can she-” 

He waves a hand. “I don’t have the time to explain afterlife politics,” he says with a teasing grin. “You’ll find out in a few decades. Leia, you don’t have to forgive me. I know what I did to you was unspeakable. Just...just don’t stay so angry. The way I did.” 

Anakin reaches for her then, but stops, before heading for the door. 

When he disappears, Leia looks around the now eerily silent apartment and shakes. “H-Han? Han?” 

He’s there in a moment, dashing in. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m here. You okay?” 

She nods and takes a breath. “I want it all. I want to take it all.” 

Han stares at her, eyes wide. “You want- All of it? You mean...all of it?” 

“Yes. I want all of it. I want the clothes, I want the furniture, the photos, all of it.” 

“Okay,” Han nods. “Okay. I mean, we’ll need to grab Chewie, and we may need to make a few trips, but-” 

Leia hugs him abruptly, her arms thrown around his neck and her face against his shoulder. 

“Hey, are you okay?” he asks, rubbing her back. 

She takes a deep breath and nods. “I...I think so. Yes. Just...Thank you. For bringing me here.” 

“Well, I do love you,” he grins playfully. 

Leia sniffles and nods, giving him a grin back. “I know.” She pecks his lips before pulling away. “Let’s start packing!” 

[rattlung]

sorry this took so long! it kinda got away from me after a bit (it’s like 6k words so i’m rlly hoping this read more works on mobile lmao) and turned into a lot of introspection, as my stuff often does when it comes to mirage for some reason. hope you enjoy :^) and ty for sending smth in

(yeah ik mystik keeping in contact through fuckin fan mail is a bit of a stretch especially since crypto mentions burning letters, implying communication through paper, but it was the only thing i could come up with and i didn’t want this to take longer than necessary. just kinda shrug it off because at this point - eh yknow??? the letter mirage comes across is based off the one crypto sends to mystik in the loading screen with him and gibby

also, i looked up a ton of different sites and even checked the wiki but i’m still nervous about crypto’s name and how to write it properly. if i’m still doing it wrong, please please PLEASE let me know. i will literally rewrite this entire thing lmao)

established relationship kinda idk and also set in a kinda canon divergent au where the games hold seasons that last a few months with set teams

----=----

Despite popular belief, Elliott was a smart guy. He lived and studied under his mother, an amazing engineer in her own right, and even had a huge part in the development of some of the tech he used in the arena. It’s just that, sometimes, even he forgot about his own intelligence. Standing next to his fellow legends, it was like any confidence he had left in one fell swoop. He would stutter under their gazes and second guess himself on anything he said the second he said it. It’s something he’d always berate himself on later when he’s alone in his dorm where no one could see him.

Because he was smart. He’d tell himself that when he looked at his own smiling face, as surrounded as he was by it. Apex merch, some fanart, some cutouts they had stood up in stores he’d been sent. Elliott would stare at it all and remind himself that Mirage in the media was who he was. He’d gotten to legend status on his own, and that wasn’t something to write off. He was as intelligent as the rest of them, he just needed to remember that.

Though, admittedly, it did take Elliott a good minute to realize that the message he’d been sent wasn’t for him.

But, in his defense, this wasn’t an issue that had ever come up before. After their breach that forced them to move planets, the Apex Team had taken extra precautions when it came to legends getting fan mail. Elliott hadn’t blamed them, but he still couldn’t help but raise a brow at the extent they went to. In his opinion, it was just, like, two steps above sending it in on paper the old fashioned way. Honestly, that would go faster, since that didn’t need to be scoured by security software. Sometimes the dates lagged by so much that Elliott would get things months after a someone sent it.

So, yes, it did require a few read through’s for him to parse what was going on in the small paragraph. To be fair, it had his name in it. Don’t act so pretentious, TJ, everyone knows who Mirage is. The rest of the message was written in the same way: to someone who wasn’t actually Elliott and from someone who’s seemingly exchanged letters with this “TJ” before.

Maybe the program was on the fritz, picked out Elliott’s alias and sent it over to his inbox. It was something worth mentioning to the higher ups, because that absolutely had to be a liability in their new safety protocols. But more importantly - and definitely the thing he was going to address first - who was this letter for? Who was TJ?

There were only a few options, as most of the legends had opted to come forth with their real names when signing up for the Games. Elliott knew Bloodhound still operated under a veil of mystery, but he doubted they could be TJ. From what he remembered when he walked passed their dorm - which was usually something he tried to do quickly, since the bird Hound kept in there with them seemed to like Elliott only a little more than it liked Pathfinder - they didn’t even have a computer set up. No contact to the outside world unless it was through interviews.

Wraith just recently came across her name, Elliott remembered. She’d mentioned it in passing before disappearing for a few weeks in an abrupt request for time off. Wraith never really talked to anyone, so it kind of made sense. Everyone needed someone to vent to, even if it was about Elliott. What could TJ stand for? Taylor Jenkins? Tanya Jones?

Tilly Junior.

But then again, it really could have been any of them. Elliott wouldn’t put it passed Caustic to be using a fake name. Any of them could be using a fake name, and he doubted going around and asking would get him anywhere. 

Elliott let the holopad slip onto the cushion of the couch he’d been lounging on, his head falling back to thump against the wall. Crypto would be able to help with the new mystery, that was at least something he was sure of. The amount of badgering and begging needed to actually get the hacker to relent and do any helping? Now that was unknown as well. 

In the months that the season encompassed, he and Crypto ended up getting closer than probably either of them would have liked - at least in the beginning. Elliott couldn’t imagine what he would have thought then if he was told that most of his nights out of the arena would be spent at the other’s side, in his dorm, Crypto fiddling with some of the tech Elliott had lying around as Elliott himself talked his ear off.

Crypto was a good listener, he found. It was something in the quiet he maintained around him, a whole lot different than, say, Bloodhound’s. Not that Bloodhound was cold and off-putting; it was more so like what Elliott imagined stepping into an ancient library would be like. Something about Bloodhound made anything above a whisper seem too loud, and out of respect for said library, Elliott left them alone.

And then there was that time Crypto had caught Elliott staring at him when he blasted Caustic with a Charge Rifle from about 300 meters away. The only thing he’d done was give Elliott that knowing smirk then followed it up with an honest to god wink. Elliott was gone after that. 

Things had changed in a steady progression. Instead of Elliott being the one to find him, Crypto would seek him out rather than hide away in his own dorm. When Elliott would invite him to his dorm, mostly joking, Crypto would surprise him by accepting. There wasn’t any verbal confirmation in the shift, though, and sometimes Elliott would worry about it, wonder if he was reading too much into things. Not that it was a big deal. He never cared much about labels, except when he really, really did.

But then Crypto would sometimes push Elliott against a wall in the downtime during the games while they were looting, or even when they were just hanging out. He’d silence ramblings by covering Elliott’s mouth with his own, and who was Elliott to tell him no? 

They were close, now, yes, but for as good as Crypto listened, he didn’t talk much. It was something Elliott attempted to change. He tried to get him to open up in various ways, but the longest he’s ever gotten Crypto to talk was when he asked about the Holo Gear Mirage used on the field. Even then, Elliott did most of the talking. He’d gushed about his mom, how she did a lot of the work and he handled more of the fine tuning, reminisced about their workshop, the long days they used to spent together. Elliott remembered picking up something different from Crypto, then, something almost sad. Like maybe he’d been missing something, too.

Elliott never got to ask about it. Crypto had retreated to his own quarters pretty fast after that. He was too confused to wonder what he’d done wrong, and the worry was put to rest before he ever actually got to worry about it at all when Crpyto sidled up next to him the next day right before the drop. The situation just reaffirmed that there was a lot that Elliott didn’t know, like what kept Crypto so quiet, who he thought about when Elliott talked about working with his mother, what he always seemed to be working on when he was alone.

Or his name, Elliott realized.

After a pause, he scrambled back into a sitting position and grabbed the holopad again. There was public information on every legend that signed up for the Games, but the last he’d checked there had been something wrong with the page dedicated to Crypto. It showed multiple different error codes that were random upon opening the page and sometimes it would even crash a browser entirely. Forums still existed, though, and Elliott would use that to his advantage.

Quietly, in the back of his mind, he felt guilty, felt like he was doing something he shouldn’t.

A lot of the threads were just talking about the recent games and Crypto’s happenings in them. They talked about his marksmanship, which was pretty impressive, Elliott had to say. It wasn’t until a few minutes of scrolling - spent looking through GIFs and videos of highlights, that he won’t admit to - brought him to a specific thread. The person who posted was wondering about the drone Crypto had in his possession, asking about its name, speculating on the model. The top comment on it claimed to have spent time behind the scenes on the Apex Games Production team and declared that the drone Crypto used had a lot of similarities to the ones they use to film the Games. 

The next comment didn’t exactly discredit the correlation, but they did say it was likely that the drone’s blueprint was leaked and got sold to another company, not Crypto having the clearance to use Apex equipment.

I doubt they’d let him have one of the official ones, with all the controversy surrounding them, the commenter said.

Elliott bit the inside of his cheek and narrowed his eyes in thought. It was a stretch, but it didn’t stop him from backing out of the forum and searching “apex filming drones”.

The first result wasn’t a link to the Apex Game’s website. It was another website with comment threads, its title “look what i found???”.

So, Elliott did.

i was doing some VERY LEGAL digging around, because i was wondering where the new guy came from and all that, but there’s literally NOTHING that isn’t hidden behind encrypted messes that would take like ten years to get through but when i tried, i got something on some dude named hyeon kim but when i went around looking for more i found this

??????

Below the post was a screenshot of an article from a news site called Outlands’ Journal. Elliott read it over, but the only thing he processed was “Disgraced computer technician, Tae Joon Park” and “Mystik, Joon’s former caretaker”.

And then, a little more down, was the comment, “Isn’t that the dude who’s wanted for murdering his sister or something?”

----=----

Despite popular belief, Elliott was a smart guy. In that moment, though, it really didn’t seem like a good thing.

----=----

The decision was one he made almost subconsciously: Elliott was not going to tell anyone what he’d found. 

How would anyone even believe it? Elliott was hardly sure he even believed it. Spoken out loud, it would seem like such a tin-foil-hat conspiracy, and it’s not like he could use the thread he’d found the information in to back the claim up. He’d checked it again when he woke the next day, wanting to make sure he hadn’t had some fever dream, but the entire thread had disappeared. Even the account it was posted from was wiped from the site. On a whim, he checked his history and went to the link directly, but that only got him an error page.

The code was something he remembered from Crypto’s buggy Legend profile.

Elliott had almost been late getting ready for the games, he sat there for so long and stared at it. Luckily, the turbulence that signified they were getting close to the closed off arena literally jolted him as a physical reminder. Elliott shook his head and stood, making his way over to the collapsible, garage-like door in order to pull it down.

Isn’t that the dude who’s wanted for murdering his sister?

He was almost regretful that he wanted to go looking for more information. What if Crypto was somehow able to track the searches that were relevant to the article? That could be how the thread was taken down so fast, how the account disappeared. Was that what he was doing all the time, bent over his computer? Working to hide what he’d done?

Why even join the Apex Games, a program that was widely broadcasted across planets? Wouldn’t he want to keep a low profile? How did he even get the clearance to sign up? The producers had run background check after background check when Elliott had been brought in for an interview. So his public intoxication got put under the microscope, but the murderer they let in for free?

And yet, that didn’t sound right, even when he thought it. Sure, yeah, they all technically participated in a blood sport - but the technically was heavily implied. No one actually ever died; sometimes bones were broken and people had to retire after a serious injury, but that was just about it. Everyone who signed up was capable of killing.

But capability of killing was different than cold blooded murder. At least in Elliott’s opinion.

He was just pulling on the last of his Holo Gear when the door rattled in its frame. “Pull y’self outta bed, we got a game to win!” 

“Door is closed for privacy,” Mirage berated.

Lifeline only cackled shortly before replying with, “I ain’t lookin’ at you, am I?”

Mirage pulled the door up so she could see his put-off pouting, which didn’t do much of anything besides getting her to laugh again. He followed her into the loading bay, passing Bloodhound and Wraith. They each gave him a respectful nod, always frighteningly eager to board their dropping platform. Still, Mirage responded with a courteous wink and two solid finger guns.

As the automated commentator announced the approaching drop zone, Mirage was suddenly very aware of the empty space beside him being taken up by another person. At first, neither of them said anything, but that was weird for him, so he had to say something, didn’t he?

“Fashionably late, as always,” he greeted, going for something half-joking, half-flirty. Honestly, he would proudly say he hit the mark, but Crypto didn’t say anything back. “Long night?”

Then, a too long second of silence fell between them as the dropping platforms began to hiss. Freezing air blasted, chilling his face, blowing his hair around, but it wasn’t the reason why his blood went cold in his veins. A voice went off in his head almost like an alarm. He knows, it said. He knows you found out. He knows.

“Always,” Mirage heard, just barely above the wind whipping between them. 

And it was stuff like that that made him felt immediately guilty for the fear he held just moments before. There was that haunted, pained tone that took hold of Crypto’s voice that Mirage always seemed to catch when he knew he wasn’t supposed to. Just like how he caught something like longing when Mirage had spoken of his mother. How Crypto’s empathy felt different than others when Mirage mentioned his brothers.

He didn’t talk often, sure, but Crypto couldn’t stop himself from expressing in some ways. Not around Mirage, not anymore.

Obviously, there was the possibility that Crypto had done something - that very specific something - but Mirage just couldn’t see it. He had that gut feeling, and following those types of feelings got him to where he was right then. Standing among Legends.

Legends, and Tae Joon Park.

----=----

It’s about a month of doing his best of forgetting what he’d uncovered when he realized a problem he’d overlooked. Elliott had already come to the conclusion that Tae Joon and Mystik were close, close enough to risk each other’s safety by maintaining their pen pal status. They kept in contact that way, so the fluke Elliott had gotten in his inbox was not the first letter that had ever been sent between them.

Which meant that Crypto was going to be expecting a letter from his former caretaker that Elliott didn’t know how to give him without starting a shit show.

Just another thing to add to the reasons he wasn’t getting sleep at night, because “doing his best to forget” was awfully hard. Tae Joon’s silences were just periods of dreadful anticipation to him now. Every time they were together and the tapping on Crypto’s keyboard would pause, Elliott would expect to look up to see Crypto already staring at him, glaring, asking him how long Elliott had known - 

But Tae Joon’s eyes would be on the monitor when Elliott would brave looking up, watching text wrap around the screen at all kinds of speeds. Sometimes it would freeze all at once, certain words blinking, and a corner of Tae Joon’s mouth would pull in an annoyed grimace - meaning he’d done something wrong, and the typing would start back up with a new kind of spiteful energy to it. Elliott would go back to what he was doing, wishing he could let out the breath he felt he’d been constantly holding, because sooner or later the typing would stop again.

Elliott was stressed out of his mind and it was starting to affect his performance on the field, but a horrible, evil little part of himself relished in knowing something others didn’t. That stupid, childish thrill of secret keeping. He wanted to hold it close to where no one else could see it, because he really, really wanted to. If not telling anyone meant protecting Tae Joon, then he wouldn’t tell a soul - even if that included Tae Joon himself.

But that was kind of backwards, wasn’t it? He was literally harboring a criminal, wasn’t he? Regardless of what Elliott’s stupid gut told him. Crypto was wanted for murder - but what was he supposed to do? Tell the authorities and get a potentially innocent man potentially killed? Or tell Tae Joon himself and be proven wrong, find out the very dead way that people Elliott found attractive really are out to get him. 

Knowing what he did and not doing anything about it was dangerous either way. Hence the trouble sleeping.

People were starting to notice, too. Tae Joon noticed - and it was stuff like that that was going to get Elliot into trouble. He found himself switching the names around in his head. Tae Joon Park and Crypto were now interchangeable; the only way he avoided not messing up out loud and inadvertently revealing himself and what he knew was just by... not talking. 

Which was hard to do. 

It was easier than trying to condition himself to stop using the name, though. Because Elliott liked knowing it. There was a certain level of intimacy to it; it felt different now whenever Crypto would corner him or when he’d let Elliott turn him away from his computer. It felt like he was holding someone more, in a way. Not a mystery, but a person. He was holding someone. He was holding Tae Joon, kissing Tae Joon in secret, making a mess of Tae Joon’s bed. It was so much, and in those moments the secret was something he almost couldn’t bear. He’d just barely hold himself back from breathing the name, he’d bite his tongue to stop it.

And then the guilt would flood into his head, because he was lying. It felt so wrong to know this when Tae Joon wasn’t the one to tell him. So, Elliott withdrew. He was polite in the games, communicated as much as necessary, still bantered with Lifeline. Slowly he weaned himself off of flirting with their other teammate and reverted back to the beginning of the season. Except, not quite, really. Even in the beginning Elliott couldn’t help himself when it came to Crypto, but back then it was petty arguments that he didn’t know he craved. Now, it wasn’t much of anything besides civility.

The worst part of it might have been that Tae Joon never asked why. He allowed the regression to happen nonchalantly, but that was on purpose. Every so often, Elliott would still get pushed against a wall, when no one else was around. Tae Joon wouldn’t ask why Elliott didn’t talk to him, didn’t visit him, didn’t invite him to his dorm anymore. He would just kiss him, hard, desperate. It was almost like it wasn’t surprising to him. Like maybe Tae Joon had been waiting for it to end the entire time.

Shame would tear Elliott up after he’d pull away without a word. It would tear him up even worse when the next time Elliott saw him, Tae Joon would act as if nothing happened. Business as usual.

----=----

It had to end in some way, so Elliott really shouldn’t have been shocked when it actually happened - or that it was his fault that it went down the way it did.

----=----

He never had liked fighting Wraith. Mirage had been on her squad a few seasons ago and they’d spent a lot of their time in the arena watching the other work. So Mirage knew her tricks, but worst of all, Wraith knew his. Besides his good looks, charm, and being a crack shot with the Wingman, tricks were just about all Mirage had. 

She had followed the sounds of his footsteps when he’d cloaked earlier in the gunfight to heal, weaving through the decoys he’d dropped without skipping a beat. It was a mess of bursts from SMGs, Wraith phasing away to duck behind cover. Another few bursts and MIrage would get sprayed down, only to disintegrate into lights and have him reappear around another corner. 

Mirage strained to hear over the firing outside for her footsteps, placing her somewhere downstairs. He continued up, for once being grateful for the Skyhook buildings and the buffer they provided with their multiple levels. It gave him time to repair the damage done to his shields as Wraith presumably did the same before she began her chase again. They were bound to run out of supplies and floors at some point, but all Mirage needed to do was buy time for his teammates to secure their kills so they could come and take her off his hands.

It was a good plan up until it stopped working. Thing was, Wraith was fast, and Mirage was learning that if you’re not in her squad as often as you used to be, you forget just how fast she could be.

He heard the cocking of a Peacekeeper after he was a few paces onto the roof, which is also when he remembered seeing a fucking zipline in the building on his way toward the stairs. He hadn’t thought about it, immediately stored it under the dumb idea section; zipping straight up to the top floor just for Wraith to light him up and have him fall straight back down like a ton of bricks? No thank you, he’d take the stairs.

“Fuck,” Mirage said quickly, just as a shotgun blast exploded in front of him. Most of the spread was dodged by running around one of the pallets stacked with construction materials, but it still cracked through what was left of his shields. 

He was dead, Mirage was absolutely dead. There was no way his Wingman was going to win against a Peacekeeper, not unless he hit every shot and Wraith missed all of hers - which she didn’t, she never missed.

A kick was placed neatly between his shoulders and Mirage flailed wildly, gripped at the metal framing of an empty wall and used the momentum to swing around - 

- directly into another shotgun blast, one of which he took right into the stomach. That sent him sprawling. He landed hard on his back and the air was knocked out of him, leaving him gasping for it as he skidded a few paces forward. 

Calmly, Wraith sauntered over to stand above him, reloading the few shots she’d used in her Peacekeeper. Mirage wanted to say something to maybe lessen the blow his pride and his body just took, but the only thing he could get out was a wet cough.

She grinned at him and knelt, shotgun going to one side so she could show Mirage the blade she held before pressing it to his throat. “Don’t worry,” she whispered, leaning in close. “I would have gotten you either way. Zigged or zagged.”

Mirage would’ve rolled his eyes had it not been for the kunai at his jugular, so all he did was swallow and wait for the push. But it never came. In the very next moment, Wraith was sent flying to the ground next to Mirage, her side smoking from a fresh Mastiff shot, the sudden sound of it nearly deafening him.

She pushed up unsteadily in an attempt to get to her feet, but Crypto beat her by grabbing at the scarf at her neck. “It seems like you zigged,” he started, mocking her previous low tone with his own smug lilt. Mirage watched as he raised his hand and his drone seemingly appeared in his grip while he finished with, “When you should have just quit and gone home.”

The drone came down against Wraith’s head hard, and in the time it took Mirage to blink, she was replaced with a golden case.

Crypto turned to face him, then, showing off the small smirk he’d been wearing. “Fashionably late,” he announced with a shrug.

Mirage couldn’t help the relieved grin that spread across his own face. “As always. Love that about you, kid.”

Crypto knelt at his side, taking the place Wraith had left behind, and fished around in the pack around his waist for the syringes he kept there. Once it was plunged into his chest, all of Elliott’s muscles seemed to twitch, but he felt his heart rate lower down to something manageable. He lost a lot of blood, though. He was going to have to huddle in a corner and lick his wounds for at least another five minutes before he’d be anywhere close to mobile.

“Thank you,” Mirage said in between a few deep breaths. “You’re a lifesaver.”

“Match isn’t done yet,” Crypto chided lowly. He stood up straight and held out his hand for Mirage to take.

Which he did, but he only got halfway up before he hit the ground again. The cracking snap of a Kraber shot echoed in the empty air above the buildings and Mirage stared up at the blue sky, wondering why he wasn’t feeling any pain. Then, he heard the sound of himself hitting the floor for a third time and thought, that’s weird, I thought I already did that.

 After that, he thought, I lost a lot of blood.

Tae Joon, is the next thing that came to his mind in the form of a horrible realization, one that he ended up voicing out loud in fear, in panic. He sat up from the adrenaline that panic gave him, hysterically hoping that maybe that the other hadn’t heard him, but mostly to satisfy the need of having to see if Tae Joon was okay.

And he wasn’t, not really. He was on his back, too, propped up on one elbow, one hand clutching at his shoulder that was spilling red between his fingers. But worst of all, he was staring at Mirage like the pain was second to the shock.

Mirage didn’t like the look he was getting, and it was especially devastating that it was Tae Joon who was the one giving it to him. Underneath the cloud from the medicine coursing through his system, he knew he had to explain, had to make it so Tae Joon could understand that Mirage knowing his secret wasn’t a big deal, that’d he’d known for a long time and nothing bad had happened.

So, he began with “Tae - “ and then, for some reason, finished with, “Tae - tuh - tuh - uh - totally thought you were going to die from that.”

Finally, he thought, Nice save, and collapsed.

----=----

They didn’t win, but that was the least of their worries. Well, maybe not Lifeline’s, but that was beside the point.

Elliott left the medbay as soon as he could, which still took a good amount of time. The nurse had mentioned something about the side effects of the Revival Syringe along with blood loss and not using anymore meds to stabilize after he was injected. They spent extra time checking his vitals and Elliott didn’t have to be a doctor to tell them that those were going to be skewed.

His heart was still racing when he made his way back into the dorms. It was a little relieving to find that it was empty; after the games, everyone typically accumulated in the mess hall to celebrate the winners. But the at the same time, it was disappointing. He almost wanted to see Tae Joon standing around every corner Elliott rounded waiting to confront him, because getting this over with meant getting back to normal, and Elliott couldn’t wait for that.

So, he risked a glance over at the other’s dorm across the sitting area as if getting a look at it would help him decide on whether or not he should knock, initiate it himself. The door was pulled up, though, left open. Elliott blinked at it once before wandering closer.

The room had always seemed bare, but the emptiness was emphasized now. He noticed that the blanket that was supposed to be folded and draped across the back of the couch to show off the South Korean flag was missing. The box Tae Joon had shoved under there and filled with parts and drives was pulled out, tipped over and empty. Even more, the drone’s docking station was gone.

Elliott rushed over to the desk and tapped the first key he could reach. Only one of the monitors flashed on, glowing blue and asking to proceed with setup. 

“Oh, no,” Elliott muttered. He hurried back out to the seating area and looked up to the screens displaying that day’s match stats. Scrolling across the top was the ETA for the ship’s landing. Ten minutes. “Oh no, no, no you fucking don’t,” he continued to say, practically running to the hall for Boarding.

It Tae Joon got into the city before Elliott could catch him on the ship, it was likely that he’d never see the man again. He couldn’t let that happen.

But Boarding was empty, too, bar the few bots that managed the floor. Elliott practically skidded to a stop in front of one of them, startling the unit’s arms up and out.

“Hey, buddy, you wouldn’t have happened to see a guy, this tall - “ He holds up his hand, palm down, level with the top of his own head. “ - might have looked pissed off, which would be my fault, so I’m trying to find him. Have you seen him?”

The bot’s screen on it’s chest flashed red in the negative, then blue in an apologetic sad face.

Elliott grunted in disappointment. “Nah, don’t sweat it,” he assured the bot, even thought he was absolutely going to. 

He was biting his lip when he exited, nervous. The ship held at least sixty people on it at once. It was a decent size and if someone like Crypto was hiding on it, someone like Elliott wasn’t going to find him.

Elliott swore, once in frustration, twice in shock when he was thrown roughly against the hard, metal wall of an empty hallway. Someone held him there with a fist against his shoulder and the threat of a pistol pressing into his abdomen. He was blinded before he could gather his bearings by a sudden flash of green light, leaving him blinking rapidly to clear his vision.

“Where did you get a gun?” Elliott chose to ask, deliriously, for some reason. “They don’t let weapons on the ship - “

“Who are you?” Tae Joon questioned. The aggression in his voice was something Elliott hadn’t heard since the first few weeks, around the same time Tae Joon was just as likely to twist his arm as he was to snap at him.

“What? Babe, you know who I am - “

“Elliott Witt is too clean, everything on him was too easy to find - they wouldn’t send an Elliott Witt to hunt me down.” His expression was neutral, but there was so much going on in his eyes that Elliot couldn’t look away, even when the gun reminded him of its presence with little jabs. “So who are you?”

And maybe there were a few things Elliott should have been offended by. Like how he wasn’t prestigious enough to warrant a protected record, or Tae Joon’s implication that he wasn’t capable of something he had already done - mostly on accident.

But what he ended up asking was, “You think I made everything up? You think I lied about my entire life for, what? Getting into bed with you?”

Tae Joon didn’t seem taken aback by the hurt that was evident in Elliott’s voice, but it did leave enough room for one second of hesitation. “Then they got to you,” he whispered, somehow sounding equal parts flat and devastated.

Elliott shook his head in confusion. Who was they? “No one fucking got to me, I actually don’t know who or what you’re talking about,” he tried to explain.

“Then how?” Tae Joon asked - angry. Elliott was finally able to identify one of the things burning in Tae Joon’s glare. Anger, and maybe confusion as well. Fear. 

How did this happen, they both seemed to be thinking. How did I let it get to this?

“How did you find out?” Tae Joon snapped when Elliott spent too long watching him. “Who told you?”

“Mystik,” Elliott blurted, shocking the other enough to pull back just a little bit. “Kind of,” he went on in a hurry. “She sent you something, and I - I think the new software they implemented for security read my name enough times in it so it got forwarded to me - I don’t know exactly! I didn’t do it on purpose, it must be mald- malfuk - bugging out! So, I went to check, and I’d show you the forum post I found, but it’s gone already, I swear.”

Tae Joon took a step back, then another. “What did you find?”

Elliott let out a breath, wet his lips in a nervous tic. He shrugged. “Just - just an article.”

Disgraced computer technician - 

Wanted for murdering his sister - 

Tae Joon looked away suddenly and down the hall, like he was planning on running again. His frown was so intense a crease began to form between his brow.

“I didn’t tell anyone,” Elliott said firmly. “I promise. But - what happened?”

“I can’t tell you that,” Tae Joon told him quickly. “If you don’t know, I can’t tell you.”

“Okay,” Elliott replied, despite how much he wanted to push.

Tae Joon seemed to sense that, gave him a troubled look. “I didn’t do it.”

“I know,” Elliott told him. “I believe you.”

It it was so easy to say, but they both knew it was more than the words spoken out loud. The admission meant Tae Joon’s shoulders could drop from their high strung, protected hunch. It meant they could both breathe. It meant Elliott could push off from the wall, get close - slowly - and gently retrieve the gun Tae Joon held to find that the safety was on. Because if he didn’t have to, Tae Joon wasn’t going to hurt him. He‘d never wanted to hurt anyone.

He put his fingers on the cool metal lining Tae Joon’s jaw to get him to look at Elliott.

“I believe you,” Elliott repeated, and Tae Joon kissed him for it. He put an open hand on the back of Elliott’s head and threaded his fingers through the curls that were there, pulling him in roughly. Elliott made a surprised noise but recovered fast enough. He pushed an arm underneath Tae Joon’s open coat to wind it around man’s waist and pressed his front to the other’s, hoping that somehow he’d get Tae Joon to feel the honesty in his words through an embrace. Thinking that he could show off the part of Elliott that was dedicated purely to him by just holding him against his chest.

Anything to get Tae Joon to stop kissing him in that same, desperate way as before, like he was still waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Elliott said when they broke apart. He didn’t let the other go, though, and rested his forehead against his. “So you can’t either.”

Tae Joon’s features darken in a very particular way. “Don’t say that.” When Elliott lifted his head a little to show him a confused expression, he goes on to explain. “They take everything.”

Who’s they? I’ll kick they’s ass.

“They can’t take Mirage,” he said, smiling. “According to you, he’s too hard to carry.”

Instead of laughing, or giving that smarmy little smirk, or even rolling his eyes, Tae Joon raised a brow and asked, “What about Elliott?”

“Elliott’s yours,” he told him without thinking. “No one’s taking that.”

Tae Joon Park moved back in to kiss Elliott again.

=====

thanks for the prompt :^)

[cam-cat-writer]

Fic

So I wrote a thing! @disaster--squid this one’s for you :D thanks for helping me back in like literally Feb 2019 figure out a proper plot for this even though I forgot about it for legit forever but it’s here now! The length... got away from me <3

Hang In There

Hunk and Lance have paired up for a ground mission and are on their way back to the castleship when, of course, everything goes wrong. Hunk might be terrified, but Lance needs him and letting Lance down is never an option.

In other words, Hunk's Mom Friend Override kicks in.

Here on AO3 or under the cut!

Though I will warn you this is over 3k so it might be easier to read this one on AO3 :) Enjoy!

"Hunk, Lance, are you guys on your way up yet?" Shiro's voice crackled through the comms. "We can't hold this position much longer, and the Galra are going to call for backup soon, if they haven't already."

Hunk and Lance were running through the tunnels on their way back to the surface. Lance spoke before Hunk could even collect his scattered thoughts enough to give a coherent report. "Affirmative, Shiro. We'll surface in about two minutes and we'll need covering fire to get back to Yellow and off the planet."

He looked at Hunk for confirmation, to which Hunk nodded.

Shiro sounded somewhat relieved. "I think we can stall for two minutes. Hurry."

Lance switched off his comm and looked sideways at Hunk. "You okay, buddy? The hardest part is behind us, we're gonna be fine," he assured him, checking around a corner before they continued upward.

Hunk tried to swallow but his throat was too dry. "Yeah, yeah, I know. I just... can't shake the feeling something's about to go horribly wrong, you know? I guess I'm just..." he had to pause to breathe before finishing his sentence. "I'm scared."

Lance nodded, understanding. "I know, it's okay, man. We just gotta get out of these tunnels and we'll be in Yellow and back on the Castle in no time, just hang in there a little longer, yeah?" He gave a quick glance at the ceiling. "Not gonna lie, I'll feel a lot better after we're not in these tunnels any more."

Hunk shot Lance a concerned look. "Are you okay?"

Lance shrugged. "After the, uh, cryopod situation, you know, when the Castle went all haywire? After that I, uh, I'm not the biggest fan of tight spaces, I guess?"

Hunk's eyebrows shot up. "Lance, you-"

Lance interrupted him quickly. "I'm fine, Hunk, I'd just really like to get out of here. Besides, the tunnels aren't that small, I'm not panicking or anything-" He cut himself off as a sentry passed through a connecting tunnel. Once the coast was clear, he cleared his throat. "I'm fine, Hunk. Promise." He grinned and threw Hunk a pair of finger guns. "Besides, I've got you, how could I not be?"

Hunk opened his mouth to reply, but before he could say anything, a low rumble echoed through the tunnel they were running through.

Lance stopped abruptly. "What was that?" Another rumble answered him, louder this time. Lance put one hand on his bayard and his other hand on Hunk's arm. "Hunk..."

Hunk put his hand over Lance's. "I don't... I don't know..." The rumbling came again, but this time it didn't stop, it just started growing louder and louder.

Their comms crackled loudly in their ears. "Guys!" Pidge's voice came through, panicked. "You have to get out of there, now! The Galra set off a series of explosions up here and now the tunnels are collapsing, you need to-" Rocks started coming loose from the ceiling, clattering to the tunnel floor.

Hunk grabbed Lance's hand and dragged him up the tunnel. "We're on our way, Pidge, I'm sending you my location-" Hunk's fingers flew over the holopad on his armor, "we're nearly to the top-"

The tunnel in front of them gave a great shudder and the ceiling caved in, filling the archway nearly to the top with rocks of various shapes and sizes.

Lance was suddenly very, very pale. "Hunk, please, please tell me there's another way out of here."

Hunk tapped his comms repeatedly. "Pidge? Pidge, we need another route."

Nothing.

Hunk felt his blood run cold. He tried again. "Pidge?" Slightly more panicked, "Shiro?"

Lance had started to pace back and forth, trying his own comms. "Keith? Coran? Anyone?"

Nothing.

They were on their own, then. Hunk looked around, trying to see an alternate route. There had to be another way out, or maybe they could make their way through the tunnel ahead? It was smooth stone above them, probably meant to be a main tunnel, so they'd be alright for the time being...

A soft noise came from behind him. Hunk whirled around to see Lance sitting on the ground, breathing shallowly and shaking, pale, eyes screwed tightly shut. Hunk sunk to the ground and put his hand gently on Lance's knee. "Hey, hey it's gonna be okay, buddy. All I need you to do is breathe with me, can you do that for me? Just in and out, nice and slow, just like this." Lance nodded shakily, trying to follow Hunk's breathing, his breath hitching unevenly as he did so. "That's it, that's it. We're going to be just fine, we'll get out of here in no time, yeah? Just keep breathing for me, there you go." Hunk kept up the soothing tone, checking over his holopad map of the tunnels they'd used to get down here in the first place. Several branching routes were shaded red, including the one they'd intended on taking back up, which appeared to have collapsed for a significant distance ahead. Lance's breathing was slowly starting to even out as Hunk traced routes over and over until he found one from where they were now that led up to the planet's surface that wasn't impossible to get through. There were a handful of intersecting tunnels that appeared to have collapsed, but the main tunnel was still intact. They'd just have to make their way through as best they could.

Hunk looked back up to see Lance's eyes on him. He smiled tentatively. "I think I've got us a way out, do you think you're ready to go?"

Lance took a few more slow breaths, significantly more even that his breathing had been earlier. "Yeah. Yeah, let's go."

Hunk stood up and helped Lance to his feet, linking their hands and squeezing gently. "I'll be here the whole way. We've got this."

Lance nodded, his grip on Hunk's hand tight. He was still a bit paler than Hunk would have liked, but he could worry about that later.

The first time they came to a caved-in intersection, Hunk turned to warn Lance. "The intersection up ahead has a bit of damage, but it doesn't look very intensive on the map so it should be just fine."

Lance paled rapidly and gripped Hunk's hand tightly again. "Okay." He swallowed hard. "Okay, just... let's get it over with."

When they turned the corner to see the intersection, Hunk sighed in relief. The cave-in was indeed minor, and it didn't look to have damaged the main tunnel they had come through. Picking their way over the rocks that had slid in from the tunnels branching off, they moved through and continued upward, with Lance looking more than a bit relieved. Hunk smiled at him reassuringly.

Unfortunately, the second caved-in intersection was not so minor. The opening was over half-full of rock and debris, which meant a climb up and through a 3-foot gap. Still not bad, and on the map it looked like it opened up again on the other side. Lance bit his lip anxiously and tightened his hold on Hunk's hand, squeezing his eyes shut as they made their way through the gap, Hunk rambling the whole way. "There we go, that's it, just a bit further... There, we're through the worst of it, you did it, now it's just down this and into the tunnel again, see it's getting wider already." He checked the map again, and thankfully there were only two more collapses to get through. His chest relaxed a bit.

As they walked quickly through the mostly undamaged tunnel, Lance seemed to breathe a little easier, and his hands shook a little less. The next crossroad was minorly damaged, hardly even a proper collapse, which they crossed easily. However, Hunk knew that the last one would not be so easy.

He was right, of course. When they reached the collapsed section, the main tunnel had partially collapsed as well, leaving them facing what was practically a wall of rock. Lance curled into himself and gripped Hunk's hand tightly.

"What now?" He asked quietly. Hunk squeezed his hand.

"We'll have to do a little bit of digging, I think. It seems to have settled, and if you look there, up on the right? The ceiling is still intact. If we climb up and dig a bit of the debris out there we should be able to get through to the other side. And after that, it's a straight shot right up to the surface through the main tunnel."

Lance nodded slowly. "Are you sure? What if-"

Hunk shook his head quickly. "Don't go down that road. It's going to be fine, okay? I've got my helmet scanner running so if there's any disturbance we'll be the first to know about it, yeah? Five minutes from now we'll be out of this tunnel and back outside."

Lance looked at Hunk, then down at their hands, and squeezed again. "Okay."

And so they climbed carefully up the mountain of rock, Lance making a concentrated effort to maintain regular breathing, and Hunk keeping up a steady stream of assurances and encouragement. When they reached the top, the gap they had to work with was about a foot both ways. The work of moving debris out of the way went fairly quickly, even as they stopped frequently to listen for rumbling and to check Hunk's scanner.

Nothing happened for awhile. They kept digging out rocks until they'd almost made an opening big enough to get through without risking accidentally dislodging more debris. Then, a low rumble echoed through the tunnel.

All of the blood drained out of Lance's face, and his hands curled into fists. "Hunk..." His breaths were coming out a bit shorter now.

Hunk grabbed Lance's hand again. "Hey, hey, look at me. We are so close, we're going to get out of here. You have to trust me on that. Follow my breathing, yeah? We're going to move this big rock here in the corner and get through here. Come on, you can do this, Lance, I know you can."

Lance nodded, breathing carefully as Hunk counted them out loud. Finally, the two managed to shift one of the larger rocks out of the way of the gap they were digging out.

The gap was barely big enough, but it would do. Hunk pushed Lance through first and then Lance pulled Hunk through from the other side.

Another low rumble echoed through the tunnel. They moved quickly down the slope on the other side and into the main tunnel.

A third rumble, louder this time. Lance grabbed Hunk's hand tightly. "Hunk..." Another rumble interrupted whatever he had been about to say, and it didn't stop. "Hunk, what-" The floor under their feet began to shake.

Hunk looked up and saw small chips start breaking off the smooth stone above and his eyes widened. "Oh. Oh, no." He pulled Lance forward and sped up until the two were sprinting through the practically vibrating tunnel. Hunk glanced down at the map as they ran, the falling debris from the ceiling getting larger as the shaking grew more violent.

A rock about the size of Hunk's fist crashed into Lance's shoulder, knocking him to one side.

"Lance!" Hunk pulled him closer and activated his shield to put over their heads as they ran. "Are you okay?"

Lance nodded, his expression tight.

As they turned around the next corner, Hunk could see daylight at the end of the tunnel. "That's it, that's our exit!" He almost laughed in relief as they drew closer to the circle of light.

The shaking had reached what appeared to be a crescendo, as the falling rock was now worryingly large. Hunk didn't say anything about the concerning size and frequency, but he did manage to coax Lance into a bit faster of a run. They were so close, it couldn't all go wrong now.

They were maybe 100 yards from the opening when the opening filled with six Galra sentries. Hunk dropped his shield and activated his bayard, slowing only a bit, Lance activating his shield and propping it over their heads as the tunnel itself continued raining down around them. Shots hit around them, shooting chunks out of the already-unstable tunnel walls.

Hunk shot the two on the right in quick succession, and then another one as they continued approaching. Lance dropped his shield and activated his bayard, shooting down the two on the left, leaving only one in the middle. As Lance lined up his shot, a chunk of stone, larger than the others, came loose and fell.

Hunk looked up and saw it fall, almost in slow motion, leaping to shove Lance out of the way. As he did, the final remaining sentry shot towards where Lance had been only a moment ago, hitting Hunk in the shoulder. As Hunk hit the ground, the ceiling slab came crashing down on his lower leg. Lance sat up from where Hunk and thrown him, coughing as he shot the sentry in the chest before turning to drop to his knees next to Hunk.

"Hunk! Oh, quiznack, Hunk, come on, buddy, look at me-" Lance shoved the rock off of Hunk's leg and rolled Hunk to the side. "Come on, buddy, we have to go, we have to get out of here."

Hunk groaned and propped himself up. "Yeah. Let's go, come on." Lance helped him up and pulled Hunk's uninjured arm over his shoulders and they moved as quickly as they could, both stumbling as the tunnel shook and crumbled around them.

After far too long, they clambered out of the tunnel and into the daylight, coughing dust out of their lungs. Hunk tapped at his comms again. "Anybody there?"

Pidge's voice came through almost immediately. "Hunk! Are you guys okay? We lost contact with you! Where are you, is Lance with you?"

Lance tapped into the comm link. "Yeah, I'm here Pidgeon. Think we can get a pickup?"

Hunk typed into the holopad quickly. "I sent you our location. We're pretty far from Yellow now though, we had to take an alternate route after the tunnel collapsed."

Pidge made a concerned noise. "What- never mind, we'll hear the whole story later. Since I've got cloaking, I'm still planetside, so I'll be there in just a tick. Just hang in there a little longer, okay?" And the comm link cut off, leaving Hunk and Lance to wait.

Hunk wrapped his uninjured arm around Lance in a side hug. "I can't wait to get off this stupid planet."

Lance gave a sort of half laugh, burying his face into Hunk's neck. "Seconded."

Later that night, after the two had been fussed over by the team and everyone had been filled in on the details, Coran insisted that Hunk and Lance join him in the infirmary.

Lance looked visibly uncomfortable as they entered, Hunk still limping slightly. Coran checked them over with several weird scanners that Hunk was far too tired to wonder about. Finally, after a lot of "hmm"ing and "hah"ing, Coran straightened up.

"Number Two, if your leg is going to heal correctly, we had better get you into a pod tonight, and it wouldn't hurt that shoulder either. You'll probably only be a couple of hours, these things are relatively minor fixes."

Hunk shrugged. "Whatever you say, Coran."

Coran looked at Lance. "Number Three, I'm sorry, but your shoulder-"

Lance swallowed hard. "Um, yeah, I kind of figured."

Coran put a hand on Lance's knee. "If you would like me to, we do have a mild sedative? You would only wake up as you came out of the pod, if you think-"

Lance was already nodding gratefully. "I'd appreciate that, Coran. Thanks."

The pod hissed as it opened and Hunk tipped forward into a pair of familiar arms. He looked up to see Lance smiling at him, dressed in his paladin pajamas.

"You good, buddy?"

Hunk nodded, throwing one of the infirmary blankets around his shoulders. "Yeah, yeah I'm fine. What about you?"

Lance nodded, looking to be in better spirits than he had before. "I'm good, yeah." He handed Hunk a change of clothes.

Hunk glanced around as he changed, noticing the empty room. "I guess everyone else has gone to bed, huh?"

Lance nodded, gesturing towards the door. "Coran waited for me to get out to make sure I was okay, but I told him I'd hang around to check on you when you got out so he could go to bed."

Hunk smiled. "Thanks for waiting for me. Do you want to go get something to eat? The pods always leave me starving."

Lance snorted. "Do you even need to ask?"

As the two headed to the kitchen, Lance cleared his throat. "I wanted to thank you for today. I couldn't have gotten out of there without you, man."

Hunk waved a hand. "You'd do the same for me, Lance. No big deal."

Lance raised an eyebrow. "Yes, big deal, Hunk. That was the bravest thing I've ever seen."

Hunk shook his head. "Brave? No way, I was terrified the whole time. I just... You needed me and it was easier to focus on that then how scared I was." He couldn't quite look Lance in the eye as he said it. "I think if I'd been there by myself... it might have been a really different story."

Lance nudged his shoulder. "Hunk, you are the most selfless person I know, and what you did? That was brave. Really brave. You saved my life, you got me out of those tunnels." Lance wrapped his arms around Hunk in a loose hug. "If I'd been there by myself it also would have been a very different story." His voice wavered and he swallowed thickly. "I don't know what I'd do without you, Hunk. Today or any day. I love you, buddy."

Hunk sank into the hug gratefully, already starting to tear up. "Thanks."

Lance hugged him more tightly, sounding like he was on the verge of tears himself. "Anytime."

Hunk held Lance tightly, grounding himself in the contact. "I love you too, Lance. You... you're my best friend. I don't know what I'd do without you, either. I'm really glad we ended up out here together, you know? I'd... I'd really miss you if you'd left and I'd still been on Earth." He laughed wetly, wiping the steady stream of tears off his cheeks. "It's a good thing I didn't go back to the dorms without you and Pidge, huh?"

Lance laughed, squeezing Hunk one more time before releasing him to hold him by his shoulders at arm's length. "Yeah, I guess it is, huh?" He let go of Hunk to pull down the box in the kitchen that held the paladin's snacks. "Want to try some of those cracker things from Olkarion?"

Hunk smiled and shrugged. "Why not?"

Lance pulled out the pouch in question and then paused, biting his lip. "Hunk, can I... I mean, do you think..." He took a deep breath and looked up at Hunk. "Do you remember at the Garrison when one of us would get really homesick and we'd just cuddle all night?"

Hunk nodded. "Yeah, do you want to do it again?"

Lance nodded. "If you don't mind? I just... I don't want to be alone right now."

Hunk pulled Lance into another hug. "I don't mind at all. Besides, it's been a bit of a rough day all around, don't you think? I could do with a good cuddle."

Lance shot Hunk a pair of finger guns. "I have been told I give pretty great cuddles."

Hunk snorted. "Oh, have you now?"

Lance puffed up in mock offense. "I have! I'll have you know I am a renowned cuddle master, the reigning cuddle champion-"

Hunk smiled, heading to his room with Lance in tow. They were going to be just fine.

[incorrectgamora]

See Dem Aliens

*Teen Groot was invited to an area 51 raid by Peter Parker on September 20th, while Rocket, Drax, and Nebula are away at a weapons expo. ( Gamora thought it would be a good bonding experience for them, but that’s another story) Gamora and Peter caught Groot as he was sneaking out. *

Gamora (Livid): I can’t believe you did this. You were going to sneak all the way to Earth to raid a military base? Are you insane? Oh, just wait until Rocket hears about this. Who told you this would be a good idea?

Groot: I am Groot. <Peter>

Gamora: *turns and glares at Peter* You did WHAT?!

Peter: I have no idea what he’s talking about. Although I do admire his ambition, I would never condone such behavior

Groot: I am Groot. <Peter Parker>

Gamora: Stark’s spider-ling?

Groot: I am Groot. <yes>

Peter: Why would you want to go to an American military base on Earth anyway?

Groot: I am Groot. <To see dem aliens> *Peter starts losing it with laughter and quickly regains his composure*

Gamora: YOU ARE DEM ALIENS! Just wait until Rocket hears about this when he gets back. He’s going to be so mad! Although, he can probably never be as FURIOUS as I am right now! 

Peter: Seriously, Mora. Calm down. It isn’t a big deal. And there are worse things he could do. 

Gamora: It’s a HUGE DEAL! He could’ve been KILLED! What would we have told Rocket if that happened? How could we live with ourselves if something happened to him?!

Peter: I...I don’t know.

Gamora: Groot, you are GROUNDED! No video games until Rocket gets back on Sunday. He will take it from there.

Groot: I am Groot. < I’m sorry mom>

Gamora: What?

Groot: I am Groot.<I’m sorry mom.> 

Groot: I am Groot. < You too, helmet dad>

Groot: I am Groot. < I just really wanted to have fun with my new friend. >

Groot: I am Groot. < And see dem aliens>

Gamora (whispering, to Peter): He hasn’t apologized in two weeks. I can’t believe hes actually sorry.

Peter (whispering back): Yeah. Maybe we should revoke his punishment. Honestly, I’m pretty impressed that he went this far. 

Gamora: No way. He’s still grounded. But maybe you can call Stark and tell him what happened. Then Groot and Peter can have a nice, safe, video chat instead. That way, Peter will still get to “ see dem aliens” 

Peter: Okay. I’ll call him right now.

*Groot is angrily pouting because while he is sorry he scared Peter and Gamora so badly, he really wanted to raid area 51 with Peter Parker. *

Gamora: Hey. 

Groot: I am Groot. <Go away>

Gamora: Peter has a surprise for you in the other room. I think you’ll like it very much.

Groot: I am Groot. < Well, I guess I’ll come with you then.>

Groot: I am Groot. < It isn’t like my day could get any worse> 

* They walk into the other room*

Peter P.(Over a holopad): Hey Groot!

Groot: I am Groot <Hi>

*Peter P uses the Kimoyo bracelet Shuri made him to translate Groot. They continue talking for a minute until they get onto the subject of the raid*

Peter P: Turns out Mr. Stark owns area 51, and he says there are no aliens there anyway.

Groot: I am Groot. <I know where we can see some aliens>

Peter P: Really? Where?

Groot (turning holopad to point at Mantis): I am Groot. <Right there>

*They share a laugh. When Rocket got home he was mad, but he was also kind of impressed. Also, something weird must have happened on that trip, because all three of them were acting strange. Drax said they vowed never to speak of it. This concludes another adventure with The Guardians Of The Galaxy.*

Thank you for the request, @grootiez

[sistersofthelightforce]

Facing Facts: The mission (P1)

Anakin’s heart sinks when Queen Karee tells them about it.

“Sister Amidala, General Skywalker and Sister Tano will be posing as a family at a hotel we know to be run by an organised gang on Cato Nemodia,” Queen Karee informs the meeting room.

Truthfully, Anakin had been wondering why he was there. He’s not usually invited to these things on account of the whole “former Sith Lord” thing.

“Karee,” Padmé says, “I hate you.”

Queen Karee gives her a bright smile and replies, “Mi isan ko rotih.” 

Ahsoka huffs but she has a smile on her face so Anakin knows this will not end horrendously.

Padmé starts ranting at the Queen in a language that Anakin doesn’t understand. He glances at Ahsoka and she mouths the word “Asna”, which he assumes is the name of the language. He knows it to be the official language of Iith so that makes sense.

Ahsoka joins in the conversation, and it surprises Anakin to see from Padmé’s reaction that she’s on his side. Queen Karee gives Padmé a smug look and Padmé sighs.

Queen Karee turns to him. “As I was saying, you’ll be staying there and keeping an eye on things. When you find an opportunity to infiltrate or sabotage the gang, do so. They’ve been pilfering money from charities and profiting off exploitation.”

“I have a question?” He begins. “How exactly are we not going to get recognised?”

“Well, you and Padmé are both publicly dead, and until I can sort out declaring the existence of the Sisters to the world, you’ll stay that way. Plus a handy charm that means anyone who looks at you and thinks you look familiar will dismiss it,” Queen Karee explains.

Anakin wonders why Ahsoka is going with them, and not Leia, then remembers that Leia hates him, and she’s still not fully finished her training as a Sister. Luke doesn’t have proper Jedi training, let alone any training in magic, so that rules him out too.

But he’s happy to have Ahsoka with him. He loves all his kids equally, of course.

Anakin has another query. “Ahsoka is an adult. She looks like an adult. How is she going to pose as our kid? Not that you’re not my daughter Snips, obviously, but you don’t exactly look-“

He turns to face Ahsoka and she looks exactly like she did the day they met.

Anakin almost faints. He’s not going to get used to that anytime soon.

“Shapeshifter powers, Skyguy,” Ahsoka reminds him.

“Excellent!” Queen Karee chirps. “Now your cover story shall be this: you’re a wealthy couple from Coruscant who adopted Ahsoka when she was a baby. You lay low during the war, but now it’s over you want to go on a proper holiday as a family.”

Anakin feels like Queen Karee is way more perceptive than he gives her credit for. The look Padmé gives her says she’s thinking something very similar.

“Alright. And how do you suggest we stop this gang, exactly?” Padmé asks resignedly.

“Well, you and Anakin infiltrate through the guise of Ahsoka befriending the children of the gang members. With your diplomatic skills, Sister Amidala, I’m sure you’ll be able to find a way in. With General Skywalker’s technological expertise, he can take this chip.” Queen Karee hands him a tech chip. “And put it in their systems, which Sister Tano will find. The chip will return all the stolen money, copy all their records, which include members and connections, then proceed to shut down their systems. And obviously, all of you can use a Jedi mind trick if it’s needed. That’s what they’re for after all.” Queen Karee explains.

It sounds much too simple for Anakin’s liking. Something is bound to go wrong and they know it.

“And our names? We can’t use our own,” Ahsoka points out.

“True. Skywalker, your name will be Ben Yanam, Sister Amidala, yours will be Kira, obviously with the same surname. And Sister Tano…” Queen Karee grins. “Anata.”

Ahsoka throws the nearest loose object (which happens to be a holopad) at Karee’s head.

The first day goes off without a hitch. They already know the names and faces of two main ringleaders, so they can identify them quickly.

Anakin is surprised when no one recognised him, even knowing how the Queen’s magic works.

They quickly find the ringleaders and their families.

Ahsoka plays every part the excited teenager, quickly going and talking to the kids. She makes quick work of it, and before he knows it, she’s running up to Anakin. “Dad, can I go hang out with Baast by the beach?”

He does a double take hearing her call him “Dad” so casually. She only does it when she’s super upset normally. He gives her a wide smile.

“Course you can kiddo, if that’s okay with his parents?” Anakin gives a quick grin to one of the ringleaders he knows is at the table next to him, who the boy next to Ahsoka is grinning at, so he must be the father. Padmé is off with the other one, probably already halfway into the gang knowing her skills.

The ringleader gives him a grin in reply and nods.

“Alright then, be back by sundown.” Anakin gestures for Ahsoka to go with the kids. He trusts her to be smart.

He walks over to the ringleader. “Kids huh?”

The ringleader gives him a smile. “Indeed. Baast is 13, how about yours?”

“Anata is 14,” Anakin replies, finding it amusing how inaccurate that was.

“They certainly drive us round the bend at this age. Still not sure if it was easier raising a toddler yet.” The ringleader smiles at him and holds out his hand to shake. “Parton Grevils.”

“Ben Yanam.” Anakin shakes his hand, keeping a false smile on his face.

“You got a partner helping you raise that bundle of energy Ben?” Parton asks.

Anakin glances over at Padmé. “My wife and I adopted Anata when she was a baby.” He gestured over to where Padmé was. “She’s off making friends, as she does. Makes friends wherever she goes, that one. Think my daughter got that talent too somehow, watching her mom.” His smile is not fake or forced.

“I’ll drink to that,” Parton says. He raises his hand. “Waiter! A glass of your finest for me and my friend here!”

Padmé is reluctantly happy with him when she finds out back at the hotel room. It’s barely past sundown and Ahsoka is sitting on the couch with them, her head on Padmé’s lap.

“That’s great, General Skywalker. That will put us at a real advantage for getting into the gang.” Padmé won’t call him by his first name anymore.

“Hopefully,” is all he can say.

“And Ahsoka, have you learned anything yet?” Padmé asks.

“Not yet, Mom, but I will, I’m sure,” Ahsoka mumbles.

Anakin watches the gentle but casual way they interact, and he suspects many debriefings have been held like this.

Padmé and Ahsoka know each other well, they’d have to, they’re mother and daughter, but there’s more to it than that. They’ve fought alongside each other for years. They know each other’s fighting patterns, each other’s technique, their tells when they’re upset or stressed. They know everything there is to know about each other and Anakin wants that, he realises with a pang. He wants that with his kids, with his family. Force it wasn’t even just about Padmé anymore. He would love to have his wife back but he wants to be a father even more.

It seems he’s changed more than he thinks.

The next few days bring amazing progress, and Anakin is so proud of how the mission is going.

Then Ahsoka wakes up in the middle of the night screaming.

Padmé and Ahsoka shared the same room, and Anakin got the other one, so obviously Padmé is already by Ahsoka’s side when Anakin looks in from the doorway.

“It’s alright, ma tana gina. You’re alright. You’re safe. Momma’s here. You’re safe,” Padmé whispers over and over again, holding Ahsoka’s hands. Their foreheads are pressed together and Ahsoka is shaking.

“Dad, Dad, I need Dad. I need to see him, where is he?” Ahsoka cries and Anakin wants to run to her, but he’s not sure whether Padmé would let him anywhere near his daughter right now.

“Anakin, come in here please.” It’s not a shout, but it’s not a whisper either. She must have known he was in the doorway.

He moves as quickly as he can without running and is immediately by Ahsoka’s side. Ahsoka leans on him immediately and Padmé gives him one of Ahsoka’s hands to hold.

“Hey Snips, I’m here. Everything is okay,” Anakin reassures her. He guesses that since she sees them both as her parents, she needs them both here. It’s the only reason that Padmé would have let him in and not looked hurt.

In fact, Padmé looks the opposite, giving him a small smile. It’s the first time she’s smiled at him since he came back to life.

“Momma?” Ahsoka’s voice is calmer now.

“Here, Ahsoka, always here. You know that.” Padmé gives her a kiss on the forehead.

“Dad?” Ahsoka looks over at him.

He squeezes her hand. “We got you Snips.”

When she’s calmed down, they lay her back down, and stay on either side of their daughter.

It’s not until he’s almost asleep that Anakin realises Padmé called him by his name.

——-

Mi isan ko rotih- I love you too (Boona)

Anata- Angel (Asna)

Ma tana gina- My darling girl/My precious girl (Boona)

[barbokay]

it’s just a pain train. I’m sorry. (esp. after TROS novelisation, I’m extra sorry)

Back Story:

Post Crait (TLJ), Rey, who felt like she didn’t belong with the resistant anymore, ran away from base and was injured in an unknown planet, the bond opened, and ben saved her. He didn’t want her to, but she followed him to self-exile them self in an outer rim moon nobody knows of.Rey found out her linage (being a Palpatine), she hated it, hated herself, but Ben helped her to be back on track. Long story short, they fell in love, made a family, and then THIS happen (if you don’t want to read it, basically Poe find them and killed Ben). This is 13 years later, after Reylo baby is all grow up with no memory of his dad until his friends found out about whom his dad was and bullied him hard for being a monster’s son.

“Hey, kid. What are you doing here?”

Jacen was unbothered. He was walking around the glass case, looking around the medals and trophies that mostly got the Resistance emblem on it.

“You sure have a lot of medals.” Jacen didn’t look at Poe, his eyes kept wondering around.

“To be honest with you, it kept loosing meaning.”

“That’s too bad.” Jacen stopped and his cold gaze caught Poe’s. “Which ones do you get for killing my father?” Jacen tried his best to keep from showing his overwhelming emotions.

“What?” Poe was caught off guard.

“Which one is it? Is it this one? ‘Bravery in defense of the resistance’. Has killing my father lost any meaning to you? Don’t you feel proud of yourself for it?” Jacen’s eyes started to glass and darken. He saw Poe and it’s like he’s in his mother’s vision where Poe Dameron shot his father and now he could only see red.

“Jacen... kid. You don’t understand.”

“What should I understand?” His eyes are now brimmed red and the blood vessel in his eyes breaks. The glass cases shook as well as the ground and it put Poe into a jolt of shock. Jacen’s force is causing all of it. His power is growing by the second fueled by the anger he had in his bones.

“Son...” suddenly a whisper in Jacen’s ear. “Let go.” It whispers again but Jacen keep ignoring it.

“Stop! Jacen! STOP!” Screamed Poe with fears filling his eyes.

“Jacen... let go...” Jacen hear it again, the whisper.

“Kid! Listen! Kylo Re... Ben solo was...” Said Poe who was trying to keep his feet on the ground.

“Don’t you dare say his name!” Jacen pushed Poe to wall behind him and break every single glass case and trophy/medals with the force like dominos.

Everything in the room is broken and there were glass pieces everywhere. Poe was trying to get up from his fall when Jacen pushed him back down. Poe can feel his temple was bleeding and he got a massive headache from the bang. Jacen wanted to hurt him more, Poe deserve nothing good after what he had done to his family.

Jacen was about to step closer to Poe and do more damage to him when he heard another whisper, “Turn away, son, please. Let me show you where to go. Turn away now.”

His foot was heavy, he didn’t want to show mercy let alone weakness, but Jacen turned around anyway. He didn’t feel tug or pushed, but his feet were moving one in front of the other by itself. Like it knows where to go and his body followed it.

Jacen didn’t feel any fear when he was about to destroy Poe’s trophy room and pushed him against the wall, but now suddenly fear rushed trough him and make his body weak and tremble. He didn’t know he got that much power inside his newly developed body. He looked down at his hands and felt like it’s not his.

“No. Stop. Wait.��� His body wanted to move but his mind was stopping him. “What is happening to me?” He asked as if there was someone around him that could answer. “Who ever you are... I know you know what’s happening.”

“Keep walking, son. I promise. I’ll show you.”

Jacen took a deep breath and continued walking.

—————————******——————————

“Dameron!” Rey shouted from behind the doors. Poe, who was still sitting on floor with his bloody forehead, could only groan in pain. “Dameron!” She shouted again.

“Just come in!!” Poe shouted back in frustration.

Rey opened the door that was heavy due to the rubbles around it.

Rey got inside and look around the now destroyed trophy room. That room, she noticed it from her holopad once. It was on the news, right after she was dragged to the base. She noticed the white sharp powder that was on the floor; it was once glass from the cases. No one can smash glass like this except for force user. Jacen!

“Dameron!” She shouted one more time and heard a loud groan on the other side of the room. She carefully got to where the sound came from and then she saw Poe with bloodied cheeks trying to get off the floor. “What did you do to my son?” She was gripping her saber that was attached to her belt.

Poe let out a painful cough and weaved before he could answer. “I did nothing to him, I swear!” It was painful to talk.

“Then what the hell happen?” Her breath was heavy.

“He asked me about be.. His father.” Learned from a recent lesson, he wouldn’t say his name again.

“He had a name you know.” Said Rey walking closer to him.

“Well I won’t say it again!” Shout Poe. “That is why this bantha-crap happened.”

Rey’s lip pushed into a tight line. “Where is he?” She asked sternly.

“He ran off. I was sure he was going to hurt me again, but h..”

“Why? Why are you sure? Because he’s ben’s son or because he’s a Palpatine just like me?”

“Because I deserve it!” Poe yelled again. His answer startled Rey. She didn’t think he would say that. “I broke your family and I deserve it.”

Rey stared at Poe for a moment. She said that she could never forgive him, yet her heart started to betray her. “Do you know where he ran off to?”

“No.” He shook his head; his chest was heavy with breath.

Suddenly, Rey felt something grazing her force signature. As if someone caressed her shoulder to make her aware. She closed her eyes to concentrate and figure things out. She can feel something, something so familiar, something she longs for over 10 years now. Ben? She didn’t want to be hopeful, but it’s very hard when she want it to be true for so long that this day would come.

She’s seeing something, something familiarly cold, the metal beast she used to hate, the Tie.

“Ben’s ship... is it here?” She looked at Poe and her eyes are glistening with tears.

Poe looked at her with a great amount of confusion. “It just got here, a few days ago. It’s on Leia’s will, she order it to be brought here, I thought you knew.”

“No.” She answered quietly. “Where is it?”

—————————******——————————

“A Tie ship, First order.” Jacen was out of breath. He couldn’t believe what’s in front of him. For over 10 years now, he has been obsessed with a lot of make and models of many spaceships, but this one, the one that he had not realised belongs to his father, is another kind of a space beast. It’s impressive, yet too familiar.

Trust me. Get inside. Said the voice. Jacen was trying to figure whether that voice belongs to the light or the dark. He didn’t find a definite answer. His mother had told him something about the balance of the force, but not much that he could know what it is.

He got into the ship and the air that hits him from the inside brings an immediate memory of his childhood. Right on the arch of the cockpit, he can see something carved in. ’Jacen’s, 75 by’ and above that ‘First officer Jacen Solo’, and above that ‘Captain J. Solo’. He recognized, it’s not in his mother’s handwriting nor his, someone else wrote it on the wall, someone he wished he know or didn’t forget.

“I’ve been here.” He said quietly to himself.

Then he saw something shiny hanging by the windshield, the twin dice. He observed it at first the. Picked it up. The gold metal is cold against the warmth of his palm. He put it on his right hand and close his fingers shut. Right away he can feel and see his grandmother Leia but younger. “She’s so beautiful. Strong.” He thought. Then, someone else, he got his smirk, his stance, and he pilot the falcon it with uncle Chewie. And then he saw a little boy with dark hair, he looks just like him when he was five, only his nose is different. He was sitting on the falcon’s pilot seat, pretending to be a pilot.

Jacen. The voice is back and it startled him. It tried to warn him, but Jacen wouldn’t stop seeing his vision.

“Don’t stop me, I need to know.” He said to the thin air and he can feel it understanding him somehow.

Jacen continue to see. The black haired boy, he can hear voices too, only different ones, bad ones, from the dark side.

“I don’t know what to do with him.” The man Jacen saw earlier was talking to his grandmother.

“You don’t know or are you scared, Han?” Leia snarled back. Han, he must be the pilot. He had heard that name before

“Oh don’t put words in my mouth. You’re scared. You don’t know what to do with Ben!”

Jacen got another name, Ben, the black haired kid.

He saw him again, Ben, He is now grown. Ben stood in front of Han, darkness surrounded them. “I’m being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain.” Said Ben. His face couldn’t hide the conflict within him. “I know what I have to do but I don’t know if have the strength to do it. Will you help me?”

“Yes, anything.” Said Han. There was a pause but the red strikes through Han’s body. Seeing it send a great shiver down Jacen’s spine he almost couldn’t stand.

“No!” Someone screamed from afar, Jacen know that voice, it’s his mom.

Jacen turned around to see his mom but then he saw Ben again, only now he got a prominent scar across his face. He kneeled and looked forward as if looking through Jacen, but Jacen knew, he’s looking at someone else. Jacen turned back around and saw Rey, not a vision, she really is there.

“Jacen...” said Rey, she exhaled in relief that she had found her son in one piece. Her voice is small but it was filled lots of emotion, fear and guilt. Jacen never saw her like this.

“Mom.” He went across and hugged his mom. His whole body is cold and shaking, both in fear and adrenaline. He didn’t know what was he going through and why is this happening.

“I’m here, sweetheart. I’m here.” He’s so much taller than her but she managed to hold his son’s head. She’s scared for both of them, but she has to be strong for him.

“I don’t understand any... anything!” He yelled, the frustration is snapping. His forehead was on Rey’s shoulder.

“I know. It’s okay. You don’t have to understand.” She still wanted to protect him. ‘It’s too much, too hard for him right now.’ She thought

“Mom,” He snapped up right after she finished her sentence. His eyes were still brimmed red and his face was red and blotchy. “I need to understand. You don’t have to shield me from anything. I’m not a kid anymore. And... All this power...” it’s scary, it’ll scare you. He didn’t say it but she can hear it.

“It does not scare me, Jacen. I will never be scared of who you are, my love.” She grabbed his face.

“Ben.” Jacen said his father’s name and it made Rey’s breath hitched. “He’s my father, isn’t he? Grandma was scared of his power.” He can feel Rey’s hand that was on his face turned cold. “He killed someone. Han, my grandfather. Didn’t he?” His voice is full of anger, spite.

“He..” Rey tried to speak but couldn’t.

“He was a bad man.” That anger roared again and Rey’s hand fell from his face. She held herself tightly, afraid she might burst out. She couldn’t look at him so she starred at the ground.

“A monster.” He said it and Rey’s head snapped right up. Her eyes still got fear, but now old pain has brought another kind of emotion.

“What my friends have been mocking me with is true, isn’t it? I didn’t want to believe it, but it’s true, isn’t it? Evil blood runs inside of me, I’m a monster’s son.”

That does it for Rey.

“You.” She grabbed Jacen by his arms, her voice was course. “If the only thing you want to believe and care is what blood running inside of you, then the monster’s blood running through your vein is mine, not your father’s.” She held the great despair inside of her for as long as she could.

Jacen stared at his mother blankly, confused, dumbfounded, and somewhat betrayed. “What?”

“Your father was a bad man.” And she broke down, openly sobbing in front of her child. She pulled herself in, letting go of her son and wrapped her arms tightly around herself, needing the pressure to keep her intact. “I can’t... I can’t tell you any of this.” She promised. She promised her husband not to tell anything about him and his past to their children.

“Mom... Please.” Jacen grew Fun concern. “I need to know.”

And she did the thing she didn’t allow herself do for the past 12 years. She looked around the room, hoping that some form of Ben is there. She couldn’t find him and then she closed her eyes, reaching. ‘I have to tell him. I’m sorry.’

She open her eyes again and all she can see is the 6 year old Jacen who about to turn 7, just when she was about to hid away his memory of his father. She carefully placed her hand on his head. His hair is soft, it reminds her of Ben’s. He’s truly his son.

She took a long breath, hoping that it’d make her stronger. It did the opposite, but she had to this nonetheless. She looked at her son and she realised he deserved everything in the galaxy and that includes the truth. And then she told him everything, about her past, Ben’s past, the war, her grandfather who tormented Ben and how he turned him into the notorious Kylo Ren, how Ben fleet from the first order and saved her, how they were hiding on self-exile, how she died from fighting the only blood relative she had left, how Ben died almost died saving her, and how they fall in love and become a family. It was never hard for her to talk about the war, She fought in it, and she fought hard. But it was never easy to talk about Ben. Because no matter what, nobody will understand how a man was tormented and tortured since he was born, how his family actually pushed him aside in fear when all he wanted is to belong. People wouldn’t understand how ben and Rey were a force dyad, how she could only belongs to him and he belongs to her.

“Your father... He thought about everything. He didn’t want you to grow up carrying a huge burden of his mistake when he was not there to carry it for you. So, he made me promised to hide him from your memory so you can grow a happy kid with zero burden of the past.” It killed her when she promised it and it killed her again right now. “I hope you forgive us for doing that to you.” She wiped the tears that were on Jacen’s face “You were born from incredible love. It does not matter what blood runs inside of you. All that matters is you are our love and he loved you very much”

[goddessofmadnessheiress]

Here we go Again - a Kylo Ren fanfic

Fandom: Star Wars

Pairing: Kylo Ren x reader

Request: @atomicjuicer asked:

Summary: When you accepted the job of taking care of the children from First Order you have never expect that you also had to take care of a big grown baby as Kylo Ren.

Warnings: Commander Kylo Ren (Is this really a warning?); Fluff; Fluff Kylo;

Words: 4014

Notes: I’m sorry if there is any grammar mistake. I hope you like it, maybe it wasn’t what you are expecting but I loved writing it. Sorry for the late update.

(Y/n): Your name; (Y/l/n): Your last name;

         You are a new addiction to the First Order and even with all their bad reputation you still love your work. You are the responsible for the children that are born in the ship but are too young to start the stormtrooper program. Because of your proximity with the children you know a lot of people on the base and your best friend is Captain Phasma, the only other official who has the patient to take care of the kids.

           Phasma has presented you to General Hux, who got a liking to you for the simple reason that you are the only one who can calm down the commander when he was one of his famous tantrums. When you accepted this job in the First Order you were expecting to take care of real children and not a grown up baby such as the Commander Kylo Ren.

           Your cycle of work has ended thirty minutes ago and you are currently walking to your chambers to try getting some sleep. You stretch as much as you can without dropping your holopad you use to read books for the little children.

           When you arrive at the doors of your chambers and see a ginger hair you turn in your heels going back by the corridor you just left. Today was a really long day, the children didn’t want to sleep and you had to create a whole story so they could stop screaming and throwing things at each other.

           The last think you need today is the grown up baby that is the commander. You are half way of running away from the General when you bump into a silver armor and the impact sends you straight to the cold floor.

           With your head spinning a little bit you look up just to see the famous Captain Phasma taking her helmet off. Something she normally wouldn’t do in the middle of a corridor here anyone could see her.

           “(Y/n)! Are you okay? Have I hurt you?”  She asks in a soft voice kneeing by your side. Her rough hands hold your soft face while her worried ocean blue eyes scan your face for some kind of injuries. You let a little laugh escape your lips and she lets a smile cracks, she knows you are okay.

           “Ms. (Y/l/n)?” Hux asks in a low and raspy voice. You look over your shoulder to see the ginger general coming in your direction. You look back to your best friend trying to get her help and send the ginger away.

           Phasma stand up before you “Let me help you.” She says standing her gloved hand for you. She totally ignored your pleading, as always. The captain of the stormtroopers believes that you and the commander are a good match.

           You contrarily accept the rough material enveloping your friend’s hand and stand up. When you stand firmly in your feet you start patting your black uniform to remove the dust of the floor. You can see in the wall the shadow of Hux making a stop by side of yours and Phasma’s shadow.

           You take a long breath and turns to Hux with the most sincere smile you could manage at the moment. Which isn’t much convincing and Hux’s ginger eyebrows raise a little but you don’t notice it because you are fighting the urgency to jump in his throat right now.

           “I think this belongs to you Ms. (Y/l/n).” The general says as politely as ever. You look in between the two of you to see his gloved fingers involving you holopad. For some miracle the screen of it didn’t suffer from the fall.

           “Thank you general.” You smile at him while taking your holopad and placing it carefully under your arm.

           “I think I’m going.” Phasma announces and she leaves the corridor with a small nod as a signal of goodbye for both of you. You fight a smile as you see her putting the helmet back.

           “If you permit me asking.” No, you don’t permit but you think is better not announcing it at loud. “Why were you going in that direction if it is your free time?” Hux goes straight to the point and you roll your eyes.

           “Because the last thing I need today is taking care of Kylo’s tantrums.” You say as politely as you can without being disrespectful for any of your superiors. Being fired it the last think you need right now.

           “But I hadn’t said anything yet.” He argues with you and you notice the general fighting a smile of his own.

           “Kylo’s tantrums are the only reason you look for me general.” You answer letting your tiredness take your tone but you still manage to fight a yawn.

           “Maybe I was here to invite you to a dinner.” You feel you checks warning with this unexpected response from the general. “But I see that is Ren who have your mind.” He winks at you with a malicious smile on his lips. Why everyone on this ship thinks the two of you are the perfect match for each other?

           “No! It is not like that general!” You shout so fast and so loud that makes Hux’s eyebrow rise so high that almost touch the edge of his hair and your tired and sleepy brain notices it. You try to fight a laugh.  

           “Are you just this desperate to have a date with me?” Hux asks in a playful tone.  You can’t avoid rolling your eyes at this commentary.

           “No. I’m desperate to prove you wrong about Kylo.” You answer laughing which make the general smile a little. ‘Of course he is wrong, isn’t he?’ You think to yourself and your stupid brain answer a simple ‘No, he isn’t’.

           “Of course…” He says rolling his green eyes. “But you are right about the tantrums.” When this reply leaves his lips you grown audibly and Hux cracks a wicked smile in your direction. “He’s in his office.”

           And then Hux leaves the corridor marching with his hands at his back and his head rise high. He acts as he hasn’t talked to you at all. You roll your eyes at his attitude. You don’t know who is worst: The General or The Commander.

           You look at your holopad resting under your arm and you wonder. ‘Will it be helpful?’ And then a smile steals your face while you imagine a scenario where you are reading a fairy tale for the great commander of the First Order.

           You decide that entering your room and putting away your holopad is a waste of time. As soon as you finish talking with Ren as soon you can go back to your free time. And you’re almost sure if you enter your room you would go straight to your bed.

           Your tired legs make their way to the commander’s office. You done this patch so many times that you are walking in an automatic way. You let a yawn escape your lips and a young mom you know for your work smile sadly at you. You are almost sure everyone that knows about the commander has pity of you.

           You fight your urgency to run back to your room and let the others deal with Kylo but again losing your job isn’t something you need in this moment of your life. You already fought so much to get this job in the First Order you can’t let yourself lose it.

           You are so catch up in your own mind that you don’t even realize you are already in front of the heavy doors of Kylo’s office. You make a tilt stop when you see yourself in a dead end.

            Why his office was to be the last door of the corridor?

           You listen to the echo of the steps of the stormtroopers but you can’t see them. They are in the other corridor, way back from this one. You look over your shoulder: it is a long and desert corridor.

           If Kylo attacks you no one would hear your scream of help. You shake this idea out of your head and your eyes fall back to the huge door. Your shaking hand is in middle air to knock on the door when it opens.

           “Come in.” A mechanic voice that you aren’t afraid anymore calls you.

‘If I’m not afraid of him… Why my legs are shaking?’ You ask yourself hoping Kylo won’t read your mind.  

You enter the small and dark room that is shattered to pieces. Everything that was meant to be in his desk is broken on the ground. While you are looking and calculating all the damage you see by the corner of your eyes red sparks flying.

You avert one spark that is flying in your direction as fast as you can. You look in the direction it came from just to see Kylo breathing with difficult with his red and scary saber on. Its shine is the only light on the little office.

“Commander!” You call when you see his hand rising again in the direction of the poor and already unrecognizable panel in his front. He deactivates the weapon and throws it in the door direction. You hold your breath when it passes centimeters of the side of your head.

Kylo looks over his shoulder and when he sees you he lets a distorted laugh fall of his lips. The helmet only made everything worsen. “Of course they send you…” He says tiredly and lets a sigh escaped.

You are ready to shout a reply for his audacity of not accepting some kind of help when you froze in place. Kylo is taking his helmet off. Kylo have never taken his helmet off in front of you.

“Commander. What are you doing?” You ask firmly. You didn’t expect to sound as confident as you did and a smile takes your lips.

“I’m taking my helmet off.” He answers as if you are some kind of dumb person who need people to draw to you so you can understand them. This infuriates you even more. You are here to help him and he treats you like this.

“I know. But why?” You ask a little less confident this time. He turns in your direction without his helmet and you froze in place.

He is a pretty young man with raven hair that outlines his pale face. His dark eyes shine when he sees your body’s reaction to his huge form coming close of you. Each step he takes in your direction is one you take back. Still your back hits the hard wall with a loud bang and Kylo makes his stop. He don’t want to scare you anymore than you already is.  

“I want to really see you.” He answers; He himself is a little scared of this situation. He never is so truly with his feelings. “I’m so sorry you have to be here.” He pleads falling to his knees in front of you.

You don’t know how to reaction to this. So you let your fury take off of yourself. And then you find yourself screaming with your boss. You are screaming with your commander.

“If you really are sorry you should stop acting like a spoiled child.” Kylo opens his mouth to answer you but you hold your hand between you the two before he could say anything. “You know where I should be right now? I should be sleeping. I love my work but some days it is a hard work. As it was today, I just needed a night of sleep without being awaken in the middle of the night because the Resistance is attacking us and someone should take care of the kids.”

“Wait.” Kylo stands up in a fast motion that scared you. You feel your back clueing more to the wall behind you when he approaches you with heavy steps. “Was Hux waken you up because of me?” He asks angry.

You shake your head in a ‘no’ motion and your eyes look to the ground. Kylo is so close of you that his and yours feet are centimeters of distance.

“Please (Y/n), answer me.” Kylo pleads holding your left hand his gloved fingers while his left hand rested in your chin and were slowly lifting your head. When your eyes met with his you lost your track of thoughts. “Did he interrupt you?”

“No. He found me before I entered my room.” You answer getting away for his hold. You like Kylo’s proximity to much for your own taste. He shakes his head when you get away of him.

“So why you are here?” He stops his himself before he scares you more by him following you around the little room.

“Because commander, you need someone.” You answer looking over your shoulder and feeling sad that he didn’t tried to pull you back to his long and strong arms. ‘And I was afraid of losing my job.’ You think unsure if Kylo is reading your mind or not. ‘You wanted to see him.’ Your brain complains with your rational thoughts.

Kylo tries to shakes the warmness warping itself around his cold ice heart but it is useless. He knows that you have melted the ice a long time ago. He can’t control himself when he stops behind you, who are looking to his empty wooden desk distracted.

You jump on your spot when you feel his strong hands on your shoulders. A shiver runs down your spine despite the warmness he is emanating. You find your will to snuggle in his strong chest.

“Follow me.” He says when you look up just to find his dark eyes are on you. “Please.” You have never ever heard the commander saying this word before and you fight a smile.

He gets off of you and starts walking to the doors direction. When you understand that he really meant you to follow him you have to run to catch with him. Apparently he didn’t even realize that you aren’t keeping up with his rhythm.

           It is hard keeping up the rhythm with his long legs that is why you are running after him so you won’t lose yourself in his part of the ship you don’t know anything about. All the black, cold and long corridors look the same for you.  This looks like the corridors that the high-rankings officers use.

           You are so concentrated in remembering the patch you two took, so you can go back to your chambers without losing yourself in the process, that you don’t see Kylo stopping in his spot. Your nose hits his hard back with a loud bang and you feel your head spinning with the force of the knock.

           You close your eyes expecting to feel your body hitting the hard floor but the impact never come.   You open you eyes just to see the dark ones from the commander clued on you. Your small body is clued to his had chest while his long arm is involving you fragile waist.

           “Thank you, commander.” You say slyly and avoiding his intense stare. He smiles a cute and shy smile; it feels that he isn’t used smiling.

           He puts you in your feet again and he turns in his heels to a dark heavy chambers door. You avoid his cape when he turns roughly and you try to take a better look at the door.

           It remembers a lot the doors for your chambers but way larger than them. They open silently, different from yours that always makes a weird sound when sliding, to display a dark and large apartment.

           Kylo enters without ceremony but you stay frozen in the corridor. When he feels that you aren’t following him anymore and he turns just to find you eyes wide in at the heavy doors.

           “Are you not entering?” He asks a little too rough for your taste and you enter shaking. You jump in your spot when the doors close behind you.  You look around and feel amused by the size of the room.

           “Are this your chambers?” You question and the commander, who is distracted putting his helmet and his saber in the couch, just shakes his head in a yes motion. You feel your heart accelerating in your ribcage. “What am I doing here?”

           “You said you wanted to rest.” He says as the fact that he leading you to his personal chambers is the most common thing in the whole galaxy ever. You shake your head at his infant act.

           “I was supposed to stop you from destroying more things.” You say fighting a laugh and a roll of eyes.

           “And you are doing exactly this.” He answers getting annoyed by the minute.

           “And how exactly I doing it?” You ask in disbelieve. He was the crazy one with the stupid idea. Why was he getting angry with you?

           “Well, I stay quiet in my couch while you rest a little.” He shoot form the other room that you decided not following this time.

           “If you are in the couch were I will stay?” You ask looking straight to his mask. This piece of metal scares you to hell.

           “In my bed.” He answers and turns in his direction while he is leaving his bed room. He isn’t using his cape anymore. “Here.” He throws a piece of fabric in your direction.

           You are able to take it in middle air. When you unfold it you realize it is one of his tank tops. You smile slyly at him and say a low “Thank you.” But he heard it and his heart feels the warmness once again.

           You go change yourself in his room while he is taking your holopad from the couch so he could sit there. You feel so comfortable in his t-shirt, which is so large in you that it looks like a black dress, that it makes you uncomfortable.

           Reluctantly you lie down in his bed. You aren’t supposed to be doing this and mostly you aren’t allowed to like it. You are so tired that when your head hits his pillow your eyes close instantly.

           The softness of the mattress and the sweetness of his smell make you fall asleep fast. You don’t feel when he enters the room and covers you with the warm blanket. But he stays a little longer watching you sleeping peacefully.

           He goes back to the couch with your holopad in his hands. How he can tell you that he feels? He isn’t good with words and mostly he isn’t good with feelings. He looks at your holopad, maybe there is something there that could make his confession easier if he knows what you are your likes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           You wake up some hours later with a loud sound coming from the room where Kylo is sitting in the couch. You sit up in the bed a little dazed with the sudden wake up you had.

           With your head spinning you look to the cloth in Kylo’s nightstand by the side of the big bed you are in. It had happened more time than you expected. You need to leave his room.

           You walk to the other room to warn the commander that you are leaving to your own chambers but you froze in at the door. You see Kylo with your holopad in his lab and he sees concentrated on something at the screen.

           “What you doing?” You ask gently and his head snaps in your direction. His expression seems to brighten more when his eyes lends in your form. Why you are so stunning in his clothes?

           “Reading something called ‘Beauty and the Beast’.” He answers so unsure of himself that it sounded more like a question than an actual answer.

           “Are you reading a fairy tale?” You shout in disbelieve holding a fit of laughter.

           “I don’t understand. Why she accepted him?” He asks for you with a puppy dog eyes and you instantly sit by his side on the couch. He turns in your direction looking broken. “How she loves him?”

           “She saw who he truly was. That is how love should be. Love is about wanting to protect and take care of someone you can’t live without.” You answer taking the lock of his hair that is covering his eyes.

           You let your hand for a while close to his face. You are playing with his lock of hair and looking everywhere but his eyes. He puts his bigger hand on yours and in this moment you find his stare, his dark eyes look watery.

           “Are you able to love someone like him?”

           “Everyone is able to love, commander.”

           “Call me Kylo. Please.”

           “Okay Kylo.”

           “Are you able to love someone like me?”

           “What are you talking about?” You ask and he stands up getting away of you. He doesn’t have the strength to say this looking at your pretty eyes.

           “I think I love you.” You straighten in your place and looks at his form walking for one side to the other.

           “You think?” You ask with a heavy heart and a sad tone that Kylo perceives.

           “No.” He answers turning in your direction. “I’m sure that I love you.” He continues while walking in your direction. “But I’m afraid that you won’t feel the same.” He falls on his knees in between your legs and his hands reach out to yours.

           You gladly stand your hands to him and you smile at him. His knees go weak and he sits on his own legs but his eyes never leave your face.  

           “I think I love you too.” You say and his face lower and you put your hand in his cheek.

           “You only think?” He asks in a sad tone and you lift his head up slowly. So he could look in your eyes and see the sincerity in your words.

           “No.” You answer laughing a little. “I’m sure I love you.”

           And then his lips are on yours. You don’t know how to react to this at first but then you out your arms around his neck and you pull in closer. His body covers all of yours and his hard hands on your waist pull you close to him.

           Your fingers are interlacing in his hair while his fingers are playing with the hem of his own s-shirt. The kiss in intense with all the hidden feeling but it his luxurious as you thought it would be.

           You two break up from the kiss with a heavy sigh and Kylo rest his forehead on yours. The two of you starts laughing for the whole situation but you moves a little way and look your sigh with his.

           “Stay.” He asks in a soft voice but for you it looks like a command but to him is a pleading.

           “Only if you promise doesn’t having more tantrums.”

           “I only made them so I could be with you.” He answers and you roll your eyes. His nose is snuggling in your neck and you can feel him smiling.

           “Promise me.”

           “I promise you.” He says standing up with you in his arms. You instinctively warp your legs around his waist and his hands go to your thighs.

           His face doesn’t leave the crouch of your neck and she blindly guides the two of you to his room. He lets your body fall in the mattress while he climbs on top of you and star kissing all of your face.

           “I promise.” He whispers in your ear before biting and sucking it. “I promise never leaving you, my beauty.”

           “I promise never stopping loving you, my beast.” You answer in a whisper and his face snuggles more into you while your arms and legs warp him closer to your smaller body.

           And you feel your eyes heaving again and Kylo yawns into you. His body heaving into you and when you realize the two of you are cuddling together.

[lvsifer]

PoeBen fic

Originally for the #BenPoe Hurtfest, but of course it took me ages to finish. 

A glimpse into their past, shares moments, shared comforts, and the gathering dark. Cross-posted on AO3.

preview:

“Ben…” “You know I hate that name.” “Don’t be an asshole.” Ben gives him a petulant look and Poe has to grin. “You afraid, Solo?” “I hate that name, too,” Ben snaps but doesn’t slap Poe’s hand away. He pouts with those full lips of his. Poe slides closer. “Okay, buddy. What don’t you hate?” Silence for a moment. Ben just stares at him and Poe could swear that his cheeks and ears redden. “Y—”

1

Poe sees Ben the first time when he is twelve and Ben is nine. Ben is at the side of Master Skywalker, shoulders hunched , messy black hair, face too pale to be healthy. He lacks the grace of his uncle and has none of his charisma. He speaks little and when he does, it is with strange intonation, as if he has to force each word from his lips. There’s something about him that Poe has never seen. Not just the quiet or the way he avoids eye contact, it’s something more, something other, and Poe, he wants to know. Master Skywalker’s visits rarely exceed a couple of days, but in those days that he does, Poe watches Ben. It’s new to Poe, he is not used to staying behind to observe. Action drives him, but with Ben...something pulls him back. It’s like staring at the rippleless water of a lake from a jetty, before jumping in.

The old library seems to be one of Ben’s favourite places when he isn’t training with Master Skywalker. Poe suspects it’s not for reading and rather for the privacy the dusty rooms offer. The wing that Ben chooses is cloaked in silence, and even those who venture there quickly leave when they notice Ben. And always: stacks of papyrus shoved to the end of the table, ancient texts marked with fading Jadi symbols, and closer to Ben, a holopad with calligraphy letters. Ben tries to copy them in his own splotchy strokes of ink, but it’s easy to see that he will never succeed. Yet, time and time again, Poe finds Ben practising until one day Ben swipes the desk clean, shattering the ink jar, paper and papyrus to the floor. Approaching steps—probably the librarian—startle Poe into action. He gets up that moment and wordlessly helps pick up the shards of glass. He smiles and Ben looks at him for the very first time. His eyes glint wet and black and within them something stirs that almost frightens Poe. He grabs Ben’s arm, leading him between the shelves to hide from the librarian.

It starts quietly between them, like a secret. Some unspoken thing, not kindness, but perhaps curiosity. They are strangers to each other. Perhaps they will never be more. But it doesn’t matter. From that day in the library onwards they keep coming back. Glances at first, a half-smile, a stolen touch. Then hours that amass, and Ben is quick to charge at him when they spar, and slow to speak when they merely sit and watch from behind trees or the great columns of the Academy. Ben doesn’t talk about his parents, only flinches when Poe calls them war heroes, like everyone calls them.

“They’re never there,” Ben says.

Poe stays quiet. He feels stupid, like he’s hurt Ben. He looks down.  

“I didn’t really know my parents… My grandfather raised me,” Poe says quietly.

“Grandfather,” Ben echoes.

“Yeah.” Poe swats his arm and stands. “Come on. Let’s go.”

Ben looks up at him a moment, long lashes fanning and casting streaks of shadow over his cheeks. His uneven features look like porcelain, not pretty like the boys in pictures, but like some mural in an old temple, half faded, half forgotten, unknowable.

“Okay,” Ben says.

2

Sometimes they wander deep into the jungle of Yavin 4, where flies sting them and the undergrowth scratches their legs. It does not deter them from going on until at last they hear the rush of the stream, Poe’s secret river. He’s called it Shara, after his mom. He likes to spend his few free hours here, listening to the water, staring up at the pieces of sky visible through the trees, where one day he will fly an x-wing too, just like her. When Ben accompanies him, they build spaceships from twigs and leaves or spar, and Ben wins just as often as Poe. Ben gets stronger every year.

At thirteen, Ben has grown taller than Poe, but he still walks hunched as if he doesn’t want to be looked at or talked about, and people do talk. How Ben has his mother’s eyes, but his grandfather’s soul. How his abilities far surpass those of his peers, and how too often rage seems to eclipse him when he trains with his uncle. They say, he’ll be out of control soon, that he will snap. Poe hates those rumours. Ben isn’t like that.

3

They’re by the stream again, carving lines into the wet dark earth with two thick branches, reminding Poe of Ben’s failed attempt at calligraphy. Instead of a quill, Ben now keeps the hilt of a lightsaber on his belt.

“I’m joining the fleet,” Poe says and looks up from his own artless scribble. Ben doesn’t. He says nothing, just slashes at the earth, then throws the branch to the side and sits down by the river. Poe has thought long about how to tell Ben, has kept it to himself for three months and it has festered inside him. He’s wanted to go ever since he can remember, has trained for it allof  his life. There is no feeling like being up in the air, the adrenaline high of looking down between the wings, gyre of motor beneath him like a beast at his beck and call. His mother’s legacy, and more. His freedom.

Thunder rumbles low above them and the sky dims. There’s been tension in the air all day, sudden winds, the scent of ozone, the nameless pressure preceding a storm. Poe joins Ben, sits closer than he usually does. Lightning cracks over the sky and for a moment douses all in radiance. Ben raises his head, eyes wide. He’s not a child anymore, but Poe knows there’s always been a part of Ben that was frightened by a storm. He’s not sure why, not sure if it’s fear at all, or if it’s... kinship. Thunder again. Louder this time, but still no rain. Ben inhales sharply and Poe grabs Ben’s shoulder. There’s something about him that makes Poe want to protect him.

“Ben…”

“You know I hate that name.”

“Don’t be an asshole.”

Ben gives him a petulant look and Poe has to grin.

“You afraid, Solo?”

“I hate that name, too,” Ben snaps but doesn’t slap Poe’s hand away. He pouts with those full lips of his. Poe slides closer.

“Okay, buddy. What don’t you hate?”

Silence for a moment. Ben just stares at him and Poe could swear that his cheeks and ears redden.

“Y—”

Lightning strikes and the thunder that follows is as loud as the bombs that fell when Poe was a child. This time they both wince. Ben averts his face. Poe swallows drily and takes a deep breath, tries to think of a clear sky above clouds.

“Hey. Hey it’s okay. You’re safe.” Poe repeats the words that his grandpa told him whenever he’d wake up crying in the night.

Ben stands abruptly. “I know I’m safe.” All his muscles are drawn tight and Poe watches his feet shift as if getting ready to fight. Poe stands up, too, slowly, and slides a hand to the small of Ben’s back, leading him towards the mouth of the cave to their left. Inside, burnt twigs and ash mingle midst a circle of stones. The traces of their campfire from two days ago.

“Wait here. I’ll get some new tinder before the rain starts, ok?”

“Ok.”

Poe smiles and heads outside. He strides away from the stream, looking for any dry grass he can find. He slides his mom’s knife from his pocket and cuts off thin slices of bark, then returns to the cave. Lightning sharpens all shadows as it flares. Ben has gone further inside, but here, the thunder echoes even louder. It’s deafening. The storm must be right above them. Then the hail starts. It’s slow at first, but quickens with every heartbeat until chunks of ice shatter down. Poe gathers the rest of their firewood and carries it to where Ben is cowering.

“I hate—the noise—” Ben chokes out. “And the light is so—”

Poe nods. “Yeah. Yeah the noise.” He arranges the tinder and wood and kindles it with the matches he keeps in his jacket pocket. He cups his hands and shields the spark as best as he can, gently blowing it into a flame.

“Thanks,” Ben says. His voice is barely there. He looks even paler now, almost haunted.

Poe reaches into the jacket pocket again and fishes out a dented, self-rolled cigarette. His last. He cocks an eyebrow at Ben and grins.

“You smoke?”

Uncertainty flickers over Ben’s face. “Yes.”

Poe bends forward and lights the fag over the fire, inhales and passes it over to Ben.

“Here.”

Ben takes a deep drag and his eyes bulge as he coughs out smoke.

“Good?”

“Yeah,” Ben croaks.

Poe claps him on the back grinning and is a little proud. The fire crackles and the shattering of hail turns into the prattle of rain. The thunder quiets, the lightning dims. They share the cigarette. Their shoulders brush and it’s not half bad, Ben warm beside him. Ben takes the last drag of the cigarette and turns towards him. His eyes are red-rimmed, from the smoke or from lack of sleep, or both, and he’s biting his lips and then swallows in that particular way that has the hairs on Poe’s back stand up. Poe can never avert his gaze. He leans in, and twirls a lock of Ben’s black hair between thumb and index finger. Ben doesn’t move away.

“Would it be ok to kiss you?” Poe murmurs.

“Y— Yeah. Yeah.”

Poe slides a hand to the nape of Ben’s neck and draws him forward. Just the ghost of touch as their lips brush. Fingers curl into Poe’s sleeves and Ben pulls him closer. Heat rises within Poe and he licks over Ben’s mouth, slipping his tongue inside, pressing it against Ben’s. Electricity crackles along Poe’s spine. Ben’s lips are soft and sweet and urgent in how they move against his own. Poe shoves him until Ben’s back hits the cave wall. Ben is pliant beneath his hands. God, he’s wanted to do this for so long. Fumbling hands, hot breaths.

“Can I—can I touch you?” Ben looks up, lidded eyes, kiss stained mouth.

“Absolutely.”

Fingers slide over Poe’s belt and he can feel Ben’s hands trembling. Poe kisses his mouth, his neck and shoves one hand under Ben’s shirt.

“Have you done this before?”

“Yes.” The lie is obvious.

Poe bites at Ben’s collarbone as he rubs his thumb over Ben’s left nipple. A moan falls from Ben’s lips, turns into a keening whine as his body arches towards Poe. They skid to the ground, hands still on each other. The fire bristles next to them, amber-bright, casting heat onto their faces. Ben is half in the shadow, half aglow by the flames, but his eyes are still black. A shudder runs down Poe’s back. He traces his knuckles over Ben’s cheek.

“Ben…”

“I hate that name.”

Perhaps he is right, perhaps that name is not for him.

“What should I call you?”

But Ben answers nothing. The silence stretches between them, desert-vast, unbearable. No word Poe might utter could pierce it, he knows this like the rising moisture in the air, thick, drowning each breath, remnants of storm. So he kisses Ben again, and Ben kisses back, pleading mouth ripe, begging with whine and whispers of more and please. And Poe wants all of him. This might be his last chance before the fleet and before the skies will open for him and who knows if he will ever come back or if Ben will still be there if he does. He’s kissing Ben’s neck and has his hands on Ben’s belt. He halts. Ben has averted his face. He lies limp, hair falling over his eyes, tremble to his jaw. Cold shivers through Poe and his heart sinks.

“Hey,” he murmurs and makes to stroke a strand of hair from Ben’s cheek. Ben clasps his wrist.

“Don’t.” His voice is choked, fearful.

“Did I do something you didn’t like?”

“No.”

“What is it?”

“Nothing.” Ben sits up, back turned to him. Poe moves closer, carefully wraps his arms around Ben’s wide shoulders. He holds Ben until the flames dwindle and darkness descends. In it, Ben shifts and tenses. He moves from Poe’s embrace and tilts his head as if listening to something in the air, suspended in the lengthening shadows. His features harden. Cold air seeps in from the mouth of the cave and with it, the scent of wet earth and rot. It’s visceral like carnage or blood drool slipping from the maw of a beast.

“We should go,” Poe says, heart suddenly thumping.

Ben stares out into the blackness. He walks without another word, steps heavy, and in his mien not a trace of the fear, the instinct, that now claps around Poe’s heart.

“Wait.”

Ben doesn’t. Poe speeds up his steps until he reaches him, already outside, and draws him back. Without thought Poe slaps him across the face. Ben stumbles back, eyes wide.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” The realisation of what he’s just done sears through Poe and he grabs Ben by the arms, sliding his hands to Ben’s neck. A quick kiss to his mouth, then another. Lips open, teeth clash, and Ben’s hands feel hot where they grab at Poe, the air chilly on his skin. He shoves Ben against a tree, hollow wheeze as Ben’s back meets bark. Then Poe is between his legs, hand pushing under his trousers and Ben groans, wonton, yanking him closer. He jams his hips hard against the inside of Ben’s thigh, and without thinking bends to bite at Ben’s neck. A curse falls from Ben’s mouth as Poe draws the skin between his teeth, untender, while his fingers wrap around Ben’s dick.

“Please,” Ben rasps. “Please, please.”

A surge of heat blinds all of Poe’s thoughts. There’s only Ben and how good he feels, how soft and sweet and dirty. He wants to make him come, wants it with an intensity that drives him to move his hand up and down, fast and hard, slicked only with Ben’s arousal. He can feel his own climax nearing as he drives between the crevice of Ben’s thighs with every thrust of his hip.

A shattered moan. Wet warmth spurts over Poe’s hand. He looks into Ben’s face and comes, too.

They lean against each other, breaths ragged, heat bleeding from them into the dark. Poe counts their breaths, aligns his own with Ben’s. The stickiness between his legs and on his hand dries and the chills of the night chase goosebumps over their skin. They untangle clumsily. He tries to steal a glance from Ben, but Ben keeps his eyes to the ground. Cloth shuffles, they right their clothes.

Quiet between them. They walk on.

They stumble through the undergrowth, scratching their legs and arms, guided only by the small flashlight Poe always has with him. The jungle feels almost alive around them, noise of breaking branches, shuffling leaves, bird calls and distant howls. They’re not allowed to stay out this long, and Poe finally understands why. Shadows twist, convulse around them like grimaces turning into strange shapes. Adrenaline eats what there is left of satisfaction and Poe cannot but exhale in relief once they reach the forest border. The lantern-illuminated path that leads back to the Academy comes into view and Poe turns off his flashlight. He glances at Ben. The lantern glow only grazes his hair, leaving his face to twilight. A slow inhale.

“When will you leave?” Ben asks. He does not look up.

Poe studies his face, but he can discern nothing.

“The training for the NRDF starts in a week.”

4

They have not spoken of it, but it is there between them. It won’t happen again, of that Poe is sure. A strangeness has grown between them since that night. Ben does not look him in the eye, shies from his touch, lips tight, fists tighter. Perhaps he’s right to. What they’ve done has changed them and who they are to each other, it has made them more than friends and less than lovers, for whatever that means. And he’s leaving. He’s never known it with more clarity than when Ben looks at him. Part of him wants to stay, wants to cherish what time they might claw from the routine of their trainings while Ben stays on Yavin 4, no matter if what they started in the jungle continues or not. He wants to be there for Ben, tell him that he’s not alone, that all the people are wrong to whisper about him, that he is brave and strong and so much better than what they say. But the skies call. He’s heard their song all his life, has it singing in his veins at night and day. To find out more about his mother, to become a pilot of the New Republic Defense Fleet, to serve and help and be weightless above the clouds. And Ben knows it too. Poe cannot stay. And that is that.

The last day draws near. Dusk bruises the horizon and daylight’s fading fast. He finds Ben in the library. Books lie scattered over his desk, but none of the symbols on them look familiar. Ben is writing in strange letters, arcane, on paper like he used to, but it’s not calligraphy that he scratches with strokes of blotchy ink. Poe stands by the door and stares. Something keeps him from coming closer. It’s as if there’s something around Ben, another presence, unseen, intangible, but there. A shape within the gloaming. Poe swallows hard, tries to command himself to move, to go to him, but he can’t, won’t and mustn’t. He might attract the attention of what lurks behind Ben. His breath comes short and sweat starts to bead on his forehead and palms.

Ben looks up. Their eyes meet.

Poe makes to step towards him despite the dread that grips him, but Ben’s stare halts him. No, not Ben. He was right. That name does not fit, never has. The boy at the table stands up. Poe’s heart hits like a drum, deafening as he fights the instinct to flee. The boy rounds the table slowly, and he does not look like thirteen, doesn’t look like a boy at all, even though Poe knows that’s what he is. There’s something in the way he moves, forceful, heavy, graceless. Like some awakened thing, like the stench that night in the jungle, of rot and blood, raw meat. Poe swallows hard. Everything inside him screams for him to get away, but he thinks of the way the boy flinched when thunder struck and how warm he felt. How he wanted to protect him. The boy stops right before him. They’re the same height even though he’s three years older.

“Good bye,” the boy says it as if he has to claw the words from deep within his throat. Then he shoves past Poe, marching him back a step in the process. Poe stands frozen for a heartbeat before he turns around to watch the boy go. It’s the last time he sees him in a very long while.

5

When Poe finally joins the fleet it’s like taking a breath for the first time after having been underwater for too long. The sky opens before him, but more than that, among the older pilots are a few who served with his mother and they have stories to tell. He finds more than comrades, he finds friends, and no matter how hard the training is and how exhausted he is every evening, he would not change it. There seems to be no limit to what he might do or where he might go. He hopes his mother would be proud.

Poe does wonder about the boy, hopes he’s found...something. Peace or rest or at least refuge from that shadow upon him.

But these thoughts fade, too. The years eclipse them until there is only the blue of the sky.

[gamoraspeter]

“You know, Earth had one of these too.”

Gamora barely looked up from the knife she was casually playing with when she asked, “A seedy casino?”

“No… well, yes,” Peter said. They were sitting in the huge lobby outside the casino, waiting for the others to finish their last game so they could leave. “But I meant a place that was famous for shotgun weddings.” 

He jerked his thumb towards the back of the room, where several booths stood side-by-side, the words ‘marriages here’ written above them in dozens of languages. “It was just a city, not a whole planet, but still.”

She glanced back and furrowed her brow. “I don’t see any shotguns.”

“It just means quick weddings,” he said with a smirk. “You know, for people who don’t want to wait even a few hours, or just don’t want a big fuss.”

“I see,” she said, looking curiously at him. “Are weddings required on Terra?”  

“Not technically, but they were really common. My classmates used to make fun of me because my mom wasn’t married.”

She frowned. “That’s terrible.”

“Yeah, it was pretty gross,” he said with a scowl. “Besides, you don’t need to be married to be in love.” Then he smiled at her, reaching over to take her knife-free hand. “I get the appeal, though.”

“Of being married?”

“Yeah. Declaring officially that you love a person. Having a way for everyone to instantly know ‘yeah, those people mean to be together forever.’” He shrugged, staring down where he was playing with her hand.

She was quiet for a moment before she asked, “Would you like to?”

His head snapped up. He couldn’t quite read her expression. “Huh?”

“Would you like to get married?”

“Would you like to get married?” he asked, trying to sound like his heart was not attempting to pound its way out of his chest.

“I see the appeal,” she said, a tiny smile tugging at her lips. “It would be nice to have something else to call you; I dislike the term ‘boyfriend.’”

“Yeah,” he breathed, pretty sure he was looking at her like she hung all the stars in the galaxy. “That would be nice.”

“Okay,” she said, standing up and pocketing her knife. She gave him a full-fledged grin. “Let’s do it.”

He sat stunned for a moment before he practically squeaked, jumping out of his chair and cupping her face to kiss her, though it was difficult because they were both smiling so wide.

“Oh, wait!” he said when they pulled apart. “This isn’t how it’s supposed to go!”

“No?” Gamora raised an eyebrow.

“Hang on,” he said, searching his pockets. “There’s a ritual thingy from Earth. I saw it on TV.”

After a moment of searching, the best he could come up with was an old gear from the Milano they’d replaced days ago and he’d forgotten to throw away. He thanked himself for being an unconscious hoarder as he hastily wiped it off on his pants and got down on one knee, holding it out to her.

“Gamora,” he said solemnly. “Will you marry me?”

She blinked at him for a second, looking between him and the gear. “I’ve already said –“

“It’s part of the ritual!” he said eagerly. “C’mon, just answer.”

She shook her head but smiled indulgently. “Yes, Peter, as we’ve already established, I will marry you.”

“Yes!” He did a fist-pump, and she allowed him to slip the gear onto her wrist.

“Why am I wearing this?” she asked.

“It’s supposed to be a ring, but this is all I had,” he said hastily, standing up and squeezing her in a tight hug. “She said yes!” he announced to the mostly empty room – everyone was in the casino except a couple other people waiting around like they were. One A’askvariian clapped their tentacles together a couple of times unenthusiastically.

“Let’s go find the others.” Gamora grabbed his hand to pull him into the casino and he followed happily.

The rest of their team was still assembled at a card table, about to start another round even though they were meant to be finishing up.

“Hey, a-holes!” Peter yelled from right behind them.

“Yeah, yeah, we’re almost done,” Rocket grumbled, hardly even turning to look at them.

“Well, you better hurry, because me and Gamora are gonna get married and we want you to be there.”

They all turned fully at that, Rocket actually dropping his cards and Groot, now roughly the size of a two-year-old Terran, nearly falling off Drax’s shoulder in his excitement.

“That is wonderful!” Mantis said, clapping her hands much more enthusiastically than the tentacled stranger had.

“No wonder you’re being extra sappy.” Rocket tried to scowl, but it looked more like a smile to Peter.

“We’re just holding hands,” Gamora said, rolling her eyes.

“I thought you were already married.” Drax looked confused.

“What?” Gamora looked confused back. “No, we’re -- why would you think we were already married?”

“You act like it.” He shrugged.

Peter shook his head. “Well, we’re not, but we’re gonna be, so let’s go!”

The team abandoned their game, Rocket only fake-grumbling about it a little bit, and Peter and Gamora led the group through the casino. He grinned at her every couple of steps, feeling his heart warm a little more every time he saw her answering smile. Groot bounced along beside them, keeping up a cheerful chorus of his name. 

They walked up to a bored looking notary (or whatever they were called on this planet) in one of the booths.

“Can I help you?”

“We would like to be married, please,” Gamora said, and Peter’s heart skipped a few beats.

“Great,” the notary (who didn’t have a name tag, so Peter decided to call him ‘Bob’ in his head) said indifferently. “All you have to do is sign –“

“Crap,” Peter said suddenly, cutting him off. “We were supposed to be dressed nicer.” He looked down at his clothes a little woefully, noting the blood stain on his shirt and the tear near his knee. Gamora looked good no matter what, especially in her combat clothes, but he wished his clothes had at least been clean.

Gamora didn’t seem to mind, though. “You look very nice, Peter.”

He beamed, Drax pointed out that they looked the same as usual, and Bob tried to get them to move it along.

“Great,” he repeated. “Just sign –“

“Wait!” Peter exclaimed. “You’re supposed to be holding flowers,” he said to Gamora.

“Why?”

“I don’t know. That’s how they did it on TV.”

“I am Groot?” He held out his little arm.

“Thank you,” Gamora said with a gentle smile. “But you’re not old enough to grow that many flowers yet.”

“Could you hold something else?” Mantis suggested. 

“Here,” Drax said, taking both his knives out and handing them to her. “You can hold weapons.”

“Thanks,” Gamora said sincerely, taking them and adding her sword, holding all three low enough in front of her so she could still see over them.

“Oh, good idea.” Peter threw in a blaster and Rocket pulled out a small detonator (“It’s not wired! Don’t give me that look.”). All in all, it looked like a very precarious collection, but Gamora handled it like a pro, looking fondly at the bouquet.

Bob was gaping at them with something akin to horror, but he just said, “Uh, okay. Are you ready to –“

“Wait!” Peter said again, and Bob thunked his head onto his desk. “Are there any wedding traditions from your home world?” he asked Gamora.

“I don’t remember. I was very young when Thanos destroyed it.”

“We can’t have just my traditions,” he insisted, hating the sadness in her voice. “Let’s make one up.” He looked around the room quickly, and his eyes landed on the picture behind Bob’s head. “Okay, from now on, it is traditional for the bride and groom at Zehoberei weddings to throw knives into a picture of what I can only assume is a disturbingly anatomically correct painting of some species’ heart.”

“I believe it’s a Badoon,” Gamora said. “And I approve.”

“You can’t do that,” Bob said. “Are you kidding?”

“They have to,” Drax insisted. “It’s tradition.”

“Yeah, it’s way cooler than holding flowers or whatever,” Rocket added.

“Should I put him to sleep so you can do it?” Mantis whispered, though loud enough for Bob to hear and look alarmed.

“No, no,” Peter said. “C’mon, though,” he added to Bob. “We have to.” Like the rest of them, he was fully on board with this thing he’d just made up. “Besides, we’ll buy it.”

“Um, fine, I guess,” Bob said, running a hand over his face. “Anything to hurry this up.”

“I am Groot.”

“He does have no sense of romance,” Peter said quietly, watching Gamora effortlessly transfer all the weapons she was holding to one arm so she could dig two more knives out of her pocket with the other.

“How many weapons do you have?” Bob asked, sounding slightly horrified.

She ignored him, handing one of the knives to Peter. “You first.”

Bob rolled his eyes and ducked behind his desk while Peter contemplated the picture. “Alright. I call that valve looking thing on the right.”

He just missed it, hitting the area below it instead, but it was a vast improvement considering his knife throwing skills used to be near zero.

“Close,” Gamora said with an approving smile. “I’m impressed.”

“Why?” Drax muttered. “He missed.”

“Thanks.” Peter grinned, ignoring Drax. “I had a good teacher.”

Gamora turned to the picture and considered for a moment. “I call… your knife.” Then she chucked hers and Peter watched in amazement as it landed in the handle of his.

“Marry me,” he said, a little hoarsely.                            

“That’s the plan.”

“Terrific,” Bob said, poking his head out from behind the desk. When no knives followed, he stood all the way up and held out a small holopad. “All you have to do is sign this.”

“Oh,” Peter said, frowning at it. “That’s anticlimactic.”

“People don’t exactly come here for the ceremony.”

“You should think of more things to do at weddings!” Mantis said.

“At my wedding,” Drax started. “My wife and I slaughtered several animals–“

“No!” Bob said firmly.

Drax looked offended. “It was for our dinner.”

“Maybe later,” Gamora said in a placating way.

“I got it!” Peter said, remembering something else he’d seen on TV weddings. “We’re supposed to say how we feel about each other.”

“Hello, isn’t that obvious?” Rocket asked. “Considering you’re getting married?”

Mantis was already excitedly stepping up to them, though. “I can help with this part!” She put her hand on Peter’s arm, her antennae glowing. “You feel romantic, sexual... unselfish love for Gamora.”

She smiled as the emotions flowed through her, then she hesitantly reached out to Gamora, who held out her arm. Mantis used her other hand to touch hers, so that she was holding both of them at once. “You feel the same for Peter,” she said, sounding choked up, the combination of both their emotions at once apparently too much for her.

Peter actually started to tear up a bit too when Mantis backed away. He was standing there staring at his almost-wife, holding a bouquet of weapons, wearing her badass combat clothes and giving him a beautiful smile, while they were surrounded by their family of wonderful idiots.

He leaned over to kiss her, carefully bending to avoid the knives. She moved them all to one arm again so she could get the other on the back of his head, deepening the kiss. 

It must have lasted a little too long, because Rocket started making disgusted noises and Bob said, “Can you please just sign already?”

“Alright.” Gamora sighed. She set the weapons down and reached over to sign the holopad with her finger, keeping her other hand on the back of his neck, which she knew was a sensitive spot for him. He held in a moan when she started rubbing, and the way her smile suddenly turned wicked let him know she was doing it on purpose.

“Unbelievable,” he said quietly, though he was grinning so hard he thought his face might break, signing the holo once she was done. “I can’t believe I married you.”

He kissed her again, but then he felt the gear around her wrist and pulled back. “Wait! We’re supposed to have rings!”

“Too late!” Bob said, yanking the holo back. “You signed, you’re married! Now pay for the picture and get out!”

“Rude.” Peter pouted, but quickly took out his own holo so he could transfer the units while Drax went and grabbed the picture. “Thanks, Bob.”

“Who the hell is Bob?” Bob asked, but they just walked away.

“We can get the rings later,” Gamora said, lacing her fingers through his.

“I am Groot?”

“Of course you can come,” she said.

“If he gets to go, I want to go,” Drax said quickly.

“You can all go,” Peter said. “We can terrorize a whole new employee.”

He looked at Gamora to share an eye-roll with her, only to find that she was already looking at him, a soft, affectionate smile on her face.  

“You feel any different?” he whispered, slinging an arm over her shoulders.

She slid her arm around his waist and shook her head. “Not really,” she whispered back, but she sounded pleased about it. “I think Drax was right.”

“How so?”

She looked around at their weirdo family and back up at him, then pressed a kiss to his shoulder, making him feel even warmer somehow, and said, “We were already married.”