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#my apologies to the ones that didn't make it in
ghost-proofbaby · 2 days
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september love (e.m.)
eddie finds you awake on the first night he's home from the hospital, and wonders what you're thinking.
pairing: eddie munson x reader
warnings: mentions of canon ending of season 4, except eddie didn't die. mentions of hospital and medical procedures (in passing). sort of sad, sort of not. a little bit of angst? hurt/comfort. religious imagery (specific mentions of heaven).
wc: 1.7k+
an: this was just some sort of weird rambling upon seeing the poem mentioned above at like 11 pm? 1 am? who knows. time is a construct. also, reader is compared to a 'violent' dog/animal during eddie's recovery, and if you like this metaphor/vibe, then i strongly suggest and urge you to go read @myosotisa's fic Half Life. she does it far more beautifully than i ever could, and it is one of my favorite fics. ever.
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Your head is on his chest. 
Your temple and your ear are flush with the soft cotton of his wrinkled t-shirt, the one he insisted upon sleeping on his first night home, and it’s all you can think about. The smell of week old laundry, the stubborn linger of a cologne gifted too long ago to remember the worn name of. A steady heartbeat that still pumps along a little too slow for your liking. The rise and fall of each promised breath that you force your lungs to pace themselves with. Just enough heat radiating off of him to keep you warm, here in bed, here in the dim light of twilight as he rests.
No tubes and no IVs to worry about. No nurses barging in every ten minutes. No beeping of a dozen machines to be your symphony tonight. 
No, you don’t need a machine now to keep track of his heart rate. You’ve learned to do that entirely on your own; your heart has learned how to match his with each dulled thump against the skin you cling to through this dingy old t-shirt.
It can’t be long after 3 AM, the moonlight almost as bright as a rising sun as it peeks itself in through the curtains of the window, as if whispering to check if you might still be awake.
And you are. And all you can think about, is your head on his chest. 
It’s been over a month since you’ve had this type of moment with Eddie. A moment where you’re truly, sincerely, utterly alone with him. Privacy had become a delicacy that you weren’t aware of the fragility of. You hadn’t understood its importance until you had to bask in its absence, always on edge for the next body to walk into the room and take the air out of your lungs. Always anxious for the next sound of news, always worried for the next shoe to drop. 
You’d forgotten what it had felt like for Eddie to twitch his fingers along your spine in his sleep, and for you to be the only witness to his quiet worship, even unconscious. 
Your lips part, and you almost consider whispering hard truths into the trembling night air. There’s a million and one dying words cementing your tongue to the roof of your mouth, and you know that every single one you could even manage to utter would only make you sound like a broken record. 
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you.
I’m sorry I couldn’t prevent it. 
All things already said to him when he had been drifting in and out of consciousness in that hospital bed. All apologies already buried between muted sobs as you’d clutched his knuckles a little tighter than you should have, a little too selfish in the moment to wonder if it might be hurting him. The only thing on your mind had been keeping him, holding him, feeling him. He was alive – he was alive. And for the first seven nights of his endless rest, all you could wonder is for just how much longer that desperate prayer could ring true.
Would he leave you again? Would he lose the fight? 
You can’t recall without bias which one of you had been the true wounded animal in that little room, scented with burning bleach and cacophonies of nearby patients just beyond the curtains. 
Eddie, looking up at the police who had finally come once he woke, eyes big and teary as he’d tried to wrap his head around his new reality.
You, baring teeth and claws at them in the end, ready to bite hard at anyone who got too close.
It wasn’t just the police. It was everyone. 
It was the same juxtaposition between the two of you at those nurses who would interrupt the nights, always frowning so dutifully at the sight of your carefully curled figure at Eddie’s side. When friends and family came to visit, and they all had the same look of disbelief. As if they were about to tell you that you had imagined it all; he hadn’t survived, he hadn’t come back to you, you were imagining it. You’d been all bark and awaiting bite towards Steve Harrington and the newly revived Jim Hopper, all the same. Their figures bore no difference to you when it came to protecting what was so holy to you. Him, Eddie, here and alive. Eddie, who slept enough for the both of you those nights. The pain in your back from all the uncomfortable hours spent in that little chair at his bedside was insignificant, all the headaches you’d endured from the smell of iodine that still clung to the air after every surgery were pitiful attempts at the Universe removing you from him. 
If you could, you might try to recall your reaction when Dustin Henderson had babbled on through tears as to what had happened to Eddie when the two were left alone. His final act of heroism, or so he thought. 
But you can’t. Right here, right now, you aren’t capable of living in the past. You’ve been haunted enough these last few weeks, and all your numb mind can handle is counting the beats of his heart. Like the rhythm of a song – 1, 2, 3, 4. 1, 2, 3, 4. Staccato verses that you sometimes whisper in time, getting worried when they don’t follow the infallible metronome you’ve set for him. 
“You’re still awake.”
The murmur of his voice is a drink of cold water, startling in the dark greys and blues wrapping the two of you up. 
You lift your head ever so slightly against your better judgment, “Go back to sleep, love.” 
“Touche.” 
You can see his grin even through the shadows. It’s weak, not yet quite as vibrant as it once had been, but it’s there. He’s still alive. He’s still grinning. 
“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” The pads of his fingertips are more intentional against your spine now, longer strokes and mindless shapes, “I’ve got a penny in my pocket if you tell me.”
His words are only slightly slurred. Probably residual of the pain medication they’d prescribed him.
“I wasn’t thinking about anything,” you say, and you mean it.
You hadn’t been thinking. You had just been listening to his heart and his breaths, feeling the weight of him beneath you. 
Little things you had taken for granted once upon a time. Never again, your soul aches as you let your head drop back to his chest carefully. Never again.
“You’re just laying awake, not thinking about anything, at…” he trails off, turning his cheek and squinting in the direction of the alarm clock across the room. The glow is dim, and you know you’ll have to change the batteries soon, “Four in the morning?”
4 AM. Last you had checked, it had been 3 AM. You hadn’t even noticed an hour had passed. 
“Is that really so hard to believe?” you smile up at him, and it’s just as sincere as your words had been. When his honey brown eyes meet yours, warmth drizzles down your entire being. Across your brain, down your spine, wrapping around your limbs. You could spend an eternity here, simmering in his warmth, content to your heart’s fullest capability. 
You’d almost lost him. You’d almost lost this warmth. 
You take a second to memorize his features. Studying him as if you didn’t already know every curvature, every freckle, every winkle better than you knew your own soul. You’re looking at him as if you may never look at him again, and he can tell. 
He doesn’t have to say that he gets it. His hand simply wanders up to cup your face, basking in you as you were him. Two souls, intertwining over overlapping legs and synchronized heartbeats, and he doesn’t have to say a word. 
The moment his fingers card into your baby hairs, you’re turning your mouth quickly to that warm palm. One, two, three kisses. Quick pecks, rapid succession. A secret language that you know he, and only ever he, can begin to understand. 
I love you.
I love you.
I love you. 
It drowns out all sorrow, all guilt, all hauntings. Your cracked lips, and the feeling of those lines across his palms. If there is a Heaven, it’s not somewhere in a pearly gated kingdom above. There are no hark angels and there is no bearded man awaiting. 
It’s here. It’s now. It’s 4 AM, in bed with your lover, getting to experience moments you’d come so close to losing for eternity. 
Do the poets know? They must. All the love, all the adoration, in both your bodies is too abundant for them to not feel it. To not write about it. 
“Go back to bed, love,” you repeat almost a perfect imitation of your first command when he had awakened, and this time, his eyelids flutter with your words, “I’m not gonna disappear between now and sunrise. I promise.” 
“No,” he quickly whispers back as his eyes fully shut, and your palms smooth out the wrinkles of the shirt to feel the ridges of scars hidden for now. Scars he’s ashamed of, for now. Scars you’d one day show all the love in the world to, sacred proof that he came back to you, only once he was ready. One day. “But you’re looking at me like I might.”
His words are heavy in the shades of violet now sinking into the room. But the moon is high in her sky, and the crickets are chirping to the East, and he’s right.
You’re terrified the daylight will steal him from you. You’re terrified the new day might tear away all that you’ve sunk your teeth into. 
“I’m not going to,” he mumbles around a yawn, arms slowly encasing you, pulling you in closer, “I’m not going anywhere. Yeah?” 
He’s back with that warmth, coaxing you right back into heavenly notions with him. You let him; he baits you, and you follow. 
“Yeah.”
It’s a sigh. Of hopefulness, of relief, of belief. 
This time, the I love you is more than a prayer repeated in your mind. And he somehow manages to say it back, just as he begins to slip back under. Still holding you and hands still twitching where they rest against your back. 
Let daylight come. You aren’t capable of worrying about it, or stressing about all that has happened. You aren’t capable of thinking about anything right now, because only one thing matters as your temple and ear find his heartbeat once more. 
Your head is on his chest.
eddie's taglist: @capricornrisingsstuff @thisisktrying @mediocredreams @vol2eddie @corrcdedcoffin
@ches-86 @alovesongtheywrote @its-not-rain @feralchaospixie @cheesypuffkins87
@thebook-hobbit @babez-a-licious @eddies-acousticguitar @aysheashea@kellsck
@cosmorant @billyhvrgrove-main @micheledawn1975 @eddiesxangel @siriuslysmoking
@witchwolflea @tlclick73 @magicalchocolatecheesecake @mizzfizz @nanaminswhore
@mikiepeach @ali-r3n @hawkebuckley @alwaysbeenfamous @darkyuffie-blog
@vintagehellfire @lilmisssiren @elvendria@loveryanax@stylexrepp
@princessstolas @fangirling-4-ever @eddiesguitarskills @babez-a-licious @josephquinnsfreckles
@writinginthetwilight @trixyvixx @kittydeadbones @munson-addict @bluejeangenies
@cryingglightningg @joannamuns9n @missmarch-99 @rhirojo@findmeincorneliastreet
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"Bite Me" - Alastor x Reader
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You were a strange addition to the hotel.
A quiet sinner demon with no merit to speak of who just waltzed in without much fuss or fanfare. No blowing up walls, no trying to kill anyone, no entertainment what so ever.
You were so boring, Alastor didn't even want to mess with you.
...
At first.
Then, quiet and unassuming, you slowly established yourself as both over-forgiving and sharply blunt.
It was amusing watching the whiplash on a demon's face when you flip between them so much in a single day.
Once, Angel Dust was high as a kite and practically lobbed a brick at your head. Your response was "No harm done, don't worry about it." later that same day, the spider-fellow draped an arm around Vaggie's shoulder and slung some sort of ridiculous insult. You moved his arm off of her and said "You need to learn to watch what you say or I'm ripping this arm off and shoving it down your throat."
Usually that last threat would lead to some other comment, but the flat way you said it and moved on to a different subject left the spider fellow standing there without much else to say.
How amusing!
Even he was no exemption from your two-faced nature, it seemed. One moment apologizing for accidentally blocking his path, the next informing him that you'd use his antlers as forks if he didn't leave you alone. Silly little threats that were oh-so pathetic when said by such a...underwhelming, individual.
Alastor's favorite of yours was 'I'm going to eat your kidneys'. Then how rude you were to decline the cooking lesson he offered!
Typically your quips and comments were about trivial things, little things that Alastor would purposely do in order to get a reaction.
THIS TIME, THOUGH
He had a particularly annoying run in with Vox one day, trudging back to the hotel with his patience already at its limit. Husk knew better than to comment on it, shying away from him as he prowled through the lobby. Angel Dust was at the bar counter, eyeing Alastor as he strode on through.
"Ya look like shit." He commented passively.
"Thank you ever so much for the keen observation." Alastor said with a smile. Husker flinched, ears dropping. It was only then he noticed you there as well, a forgotten drink in your hand as you gaze lingered on Husk, a frown setting to your lips.
The rest of that particular exchange wasn't of any significance. It wasn't until later when you sought him out in the Hotel's parlor things escalated.
"You need to calm down."
His grin hitched up and he leered down at you. You were more than a foot shorter than him and your big eyes did little to make you look more intimidating.
"I beg your pardon, dear?"
"I said you need to calm down." Your tail swished in agitation. "I get you had a bad day but that's no reason to take it out on other people."
Alastor chuckled "Oh goodness. My apologies, my dear. But you have absolutely no ground to tell me to do anything."
He back you up against the wall, hands planted on either side of you. His antler stretched out and his eyes took on the appearance of dials as he leaned down. Sharp teeth grazed your face, hot breath stung your eyes. Claws carved their way into the wall on either side of you.
"So, my dear, what was it you said? I'm afraid I didn't quite catch it."
"I said you need to calm down."
Alastor's eye twitched, his grin twisting into something so much more unhinged. No hesitation. Were you stupid?
A look at you said yes, but you knew damn well the danger you were in. You were trembling, pupils shaking breath shallow. But you still had the nerve to speak to him that way?
"All right, what if I don't?" He purred, tracing a claw over the side of your face "Go on ahead and let me hear whatever pathetic threat you have."
"I'll bite you." spoken in that flat tone of yours.
Alastor laughed "As amusing as always-"
Pain burst from his shoulder, sharp and sticky as fangs burst through flesh. Perhaps it was shock that had him stumble back, perhaps it was amusement that allowed you to get away from him. You opened your jaw, withdrawing your teeth from his shoulder as skin and cloth clung to the spaces between your bloodied fangs.
You gave him a pointed glare as your wiped some excess blood off of your face and prowled off without so much as giving him a second glance.
He had every right to hunt you down and rip apart your soul right then and there.
Instead he found himself losing his balance, falling onto his rear on the floor. Fingers curled over the fresh and large bite mark on his shoulder. The damn thing nearly covered the entirety of between his collar bone and his arm socket.
He pulled his hand away to stare absently at his own blood.
You must be venomous. That was the only way to explain why his heart was suddenly racing and his face suddenly felt far too warm. His breathing was off, shallow and uneven.
You actually bit him.
Were your threats actually not so empty?
Did you really intend to use his antlers as forks?
He laughed to himself, letting his hand drop back to his side. This was ridiculous! If you meant even half the strange threats you threw at him....then...
Well. He was in danger.
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backinmyphase · 1 day
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Not my honeymoon
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Synopsis: A household of an arranged marriage with Gojo Satoru wasn't easy. And as the pressure from the higher ups was becoming more and more there was something to discuss. Your honeymoon.
Or: Satoru Gojo doesn't even know how attached he will grow to his wife yet.
Pairing: Gojo x reader, 3000 words
Not really satisfied with this but I hope you enjoy!
Series Masterlist!
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"Are you okay, Gojo?"
No, he was definitely not. He wasn't since all of this started. Since he was destined to marry you. But now as he looked at you it was a different kind of not okay.
What did he do???
You looked sad, no, devastated. Ever since you two ate breakfast together every morning, he thought you would look more relaxed. Maybe even comfortable.
But you seemed to put up a barrier everytime he asked something. And then there was the name.
You still called him Gojo. Even though you were now named the same.
You so carefully kept your distance and you had this sad look in your eyes.
He was worried.
"Yeah, of course." he returned to eating his breakfast. After a bit of silence he opened his mouth again and was surprised he could speak.
"Are you? You look tense."
Your body tensed up again as you looked at him and he wanted to punch himself. He made you uncomfortable, didn't he?
"I am, no worries." you didn't raise your head.
Where did his confidence go? His charisma? His social skills?
Something about his wife made all these so important and natural things dissappear.
The silence spoke loud and the sounds of the eating didn't cover enough of it.
This silence wasn't unusual. In fact it was almost always there when you ate breakfast together. So all the time you saw each other.
And no, he didn't like it. For some reason, on which Satoru couldn't put his finger on, he desperately wanted to know you. He wanted to make peace with you, maybe even be friends with you.
But you seemed so untouchable, he couldn't describe it.
"Well…" Satoru cringed at the sound of his voice. "I have to go to work now."
He stood up and made his way to the door where he made himself ready. "See you later. Have a nice da-"
"Wait, Gojo." Your voice sounded so hesitant, it scared him. "Can we talk later?"
As he looked at you, his whole mind went blank. He felt like he was gonna die. Why did you look at him like that? What did you wanna talk about? Why not now?
"Sure, I can try to come home earlier." He tried to keep his voice steady, but his whole strongest being was shaking in fear.
"Great." you nodded with a neutral look that did NOT scream 'Great'. "Then have a good day at work."
"Thank you, you have a nice day too."
He was going to die, wasn't he?
~
"You look like a corpse." Suguru was always soo considerate.
Satoru sighed as he sat down next to his friend. "Just give me the missions."
His best friend raised an eyebrow. "You know, you should attend the meetings for a change. I'm not always gonna be able to get your missions for you."
"Yeah, you are right Suguru, what would I ever do without you? You are such a good friend." Satoru yawned as he waved his hand.
"Would you please be so kind and enlighten me where I have to be today?"
"I'm going to overlook that sarcasm for today." Suguru handed him a piece of paper. "Here's the list for today."
As Satoru looked at the very long list in horror, Suguru spoke again. "But for real, you look terrible. I thought things were going fine in your marriage?"
"Of course they want me working overtime today." Satoru groaned. "I swear one day I will make all of the higher ups-"
"Satoru, what's wrong?"
He stopped in his rant and sighed. "She wants to talk."
Suguru raised his eyebrow again. "And that's bad, why exactly?"
"Because she always looks like I killed her pet or something like that!" Satoru whined and looked at his paper.
"She doesn't like me."
Suguru shrugged with his shoulders. "I mean, you still didn't apologize."
As Satoru didn't say anything, Suguru continued. "And you also don't really talk to her. How can you expect her to like you yet?"
"Yeah, yeah, you're right." Satoru whispered. Holding his list up, he begged Suguru. "Can you take some of my missions? Please?"
Shacking his head, suguru laughed. "That one time was an exception, I had to work three days in a row for that Satoru. I'm sorry but I have lots of missions too. It's the season."
Satoru just nodded. He had seen this coming.
30 missions in only 12 hours?
It would be a challenge. And it would cause him a little trouble.
But would he give up?
He smiled to himself.
~
You didn't have any time anymore.
The letters of your mother became overbearing, asking where you and Gojo will go for your honeymoon. Asking, that you have surely talked with him about it?
No, you didn't. In fact you were too nervous to even look at him.
You were relieved that he didn't seem to despise you, since he and you ate together now. But he also didn't talk to you and that made you question yourself.
Did he even want to talk?
You needed more time. So much more time. How could they all expect, that you could just sleep with him?
No that just was absurd.
"Mrs. Gojo? How are you feeling today?"
Hina really liked you over the time. Her smile somehow made all of this a bit lighter.
How could you survive a week without her? Just with your husband and the pressure to do something?
"Alright. How are you feeling?" you smiled back, trying to hide your nervousness.
"Perfect, like always." She answered right away, bowing a bit. "Would you like a snack?"
You chuckled a bit. "I can get myself a snack, Hina, you really don't have to."
She shook her head. "Nonsense, it is my job to make you food." She smiled at you knowingly. "And I also get paid for it."
You laughed a bit. "Well, I think my husband will keep paying you even when you make me a snack less."
"If you think so Mrs. Gojo." she made a little curtsy and laughed as she went into the kitchen.
You smiled to yourself as you looked after her. You would miss her on your honeymoon.
Oh god the honeymoon…
~
"Could you please just die?!" Gojo was annoyed as fuck as the curse before him just kept sneaking into barriers and hiding from him.
Normally he wouldn't be this mad.
But he had to be home in time today. And as the curse escaped a crazy laugh at him his anger only rose.
His finger twitched. He wanted to just open his domain and make puddle of this pathetic being. But there were still people near and it would be a bit overkill.
So he had to work with red and blue.
And he had to be fast.
"Gojo Satoruuuhuuuuuu." the distorted voice of the curse spoke underneath him. So smugly, that Satoru felt like laughing.
"Found you."
Hollow purple.
As the cursed energy of the curse slowly disappeared Satoru looked at his list. Still 4 curses in 4 locations. And only 30 minutes till 9 pm.
He had to be faster. Before you would think he didn't care.
If there was just one more stupid barrier, he swore he would-
Goddammit.
~
It was almost 8:51 as you thought you should just eat and go to sleep.
Maybe you would find the courage to talk to him tomorrow too and everything would be fine.
Maybe.
"Should we serve dinner, Mrs. Gojo?" Hina looked at you and waited patiently for your answer.
And as you looked at her something in you switched.
"Wait. My husband isn't home yet, we will wait for him."
Hina chuckled and nodded. She smiled knowingly as she went into the kitchen.
You looked at the clock. 8:56 pm.
You sighed as you sat there. Playing with your glass, you wondered.
Would Gojo even want a honeymoon?
If he didn't, that would be a problem. The higher ups were persistent of you two going somewhere in japan to have 'enough time'.
Your glass seemed to shake, nerarly breaking.
What would you do? What would you tell them? What, what, what-
Forcefully the door opened and Gojo stood there.
A Gojo stained with blood, his blindfold pulled down, looking at you with big eyes.
"What did you want to talk-"
"Why are you bloody-"
You talked at the same time, looking confused at each other. You waited for an answer, as he looked at you confused.
"What do you mean, bloody?" he looked down. Then his eyes widened and he chuckled. "Oh, you don't have to worry, it's not mine."
What did he mean 'don't worry'? He looked like he was out of a horror movie!
Perplexed you looked at him. "Is this all from the curses-?"
"Anyway you wanted to talk?" only now he closed the door behind him.
You blinked at him. Two times. Three times. Then you looked down. "Yeah. But if you are to tired, we can also talk tomorrow -" or the day after, or the day after that day, or…
"I'm not too tired, don't worry." He looked behind you at the empty table. "Did you already eat?"
Just as you wanted to answer, Hina stepped in and took the opportunity to speak. "Mrs. Gojo, now that Mr. Gojo is here, should we serve the food?"
You looked at her and just nodded.
"Well, then." Gojo clapped one time. "We can talk as we eat, right? Then let's sit down."
He took your chair and you wanted to ask what he wanted to do, as he pulled it and offered you the seat. You just sat down and muttered a small thanks.
He smiled, he smiled?, and went to his seat on the opposite side of the table looking at you full of expectation.
Your mind was blank. All the words you so carefully constructed to sentences were all gone. The only thing in your head was the question:
What if Gojo didn't want a honeymoon?
"You waited for me to eat?"
You looked up to Gojo and he smiled at you again. Since when was he so talkative??
"Yeah, I did."
Your voice was much more quiet as you wanted. But he didn't seem to mind as he looked at you with that sparkle in his eyes.
Or maybe his eyes always looked like that.
"Thank you. But you don't have to do that. Most of the time I work much too long for you to stay up and not eat."
"Well, maybe we could still eat dinner together sometimes."
Your mouth spoke without your permission and his widening smile made your head dizzy.
"Your food. We hope you enjoy your meal." Hina placed dinner onto the table bowed a bit and then went into the kitchen as fast as she could.
"Soooooo." Gojo looked down at his food. "What did you wanna talk about?"
"Well…" you stopped, weighing your options of what you could say. Oh, just say it. "I wanted to discuss your honeymoon."
As you looked up you saw two big blue eyes blinking at you. "Our honeymoon? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh"
His shoulders visibly starting to relax as he sighed of relief. A smile forming on his lips again. "Whew, I thought I did something wrong. You had me scared, you know."
"I had you scared?" you looked at him in disbelief. "You came in like a madman covered in blood!"
"Oh, trust me." Gojo leaned back. "That's not nearly as terrifying as my wife, when she is angry at me. She can get really mad, you know?"
You couldn't hide the disbelief in your face and just shook your head. But slowly a smile was forming on your lips. "You're stupid."
Satoru chuckled again and took a bite of the food. Then he looked at you again. "Yeah, yeah. But back to the topic."
Leaning a bit forward, he raised an eyebrow. "Where do you want to go for our honeymoon?"
His voice sounded so casually you felt dumb. "Oh, I don't know. I wanted to ask you."
He tilted his head. "Do you even want to have a honeymoon?"
"What-" panic flooded you as you thought about the higher ups. "Of course!"
"If you say so." he didn't seem convinced but nodded. "But there has to be a place you always wanted to go."
You shook your head. "No, not really. You can decide."
His eyes narrowed as he leaned forward. "Is there no country you ever wanted to go to?"
"No!" you spoke so fast, you couldn't stop yourself from your panic taking over. "I mean- I would like to be in Japan."
He kept silent as he inspected you. And then he sighed. "I have nothing against it, if that's what you want. But you seem so on edge."
You looked down. "Sorry. This…" your throat tightens but you manage to say the words in your mind. "It's just very important."
He blinked at you again and then smiled so softly, you didn't know Satoru could even look at you like that. "It's okay, but if you are too focused on making it perfect, it sabotages itself, doesn't it?"
You couldn't bear his words. The voice of your mother played so loudly in your right ear.
Be a good wife. Be a good wife. Be a good wife be a good wife beagoodwife-
"Would you like to go to a quiet place?" Satoru chuckled to himself. "I wouldn't say no to it."
He looked so sincere. Never before had he talked to you like that. Of course you did have some small talk about his day and what you read the last day, but he seemed so relaxed and like himself right now.
Was this the charismatic Gojo Satoru so many people told you about?
"I would like that." you whispered.
"Hina?" His gaze focused on the girl who quickly emerged from the kitchen. "You and your grandma lived in Shirahama, didn't you?"
She nodded quickly and smiled. "Yes, it's nice there. A bit of the ocean to see and plenty of nature."
She looked at you expectantly. "It's really relaxing, Mrs. Gojo."
Somehow, her shy look made you smile too. "Well, we'll have to go and see it then."
Hina smiled at you with sparkling eyes and bowed a bit again. "You won't regret it!"
"Definitely not!" Satoru laughed a bit. "Then that's settled."
"What-" he looked at his food and continued eating without a care in the world. How could he just carelessly think that that was it?
"But we still have to discuss everything with the higher-ups!"
The atmosphere became much colder along with his gaze. He had stopped eating and his gaze pierced you.
His figure suddenly sitting up straight, his arms to the side, he raised his head.
"Why should I discuss our honeymoon with them?"
The words were caught up in your throat.
You looked down at your food and tried to justify your silence by eating.
"Did you just want to talk to me because of them?" his voice was so much colder than it had been seconds before.
You frantically swallowed your food. "No, I… It wasn't that, really!"
The lies were hard to get off your lips. But he couldn't know about the meetings, no, he simply couldn't!
He was silent. His gaze was lowered and you could no longer see his beautiful blue eyes.
"I wanted to… Get to know you better. We hardly know each other." You pointed to the food table.
"I think it's good that we're eating together now, but that hardly adds anything. I just wanted… For us to have more time together."
When he still didn't say anything, you lowered your head too. "It's just… I thought we still had to organize everything with them? Because of your work and clan duties?"
Gojo chuckled and you heard him looking up. "As if they could fight back. We can just leave."
His voice halled through the room. "And we will tomorrow."
"What?" Shocked, you looked at him. "You can't be serious, can you?"
A huge grin was forming on his face. "You still have to learn how serious I can be. We're leaving tomorrow."
He pulled out his cell phone and typed something. "One of my clan employees will arrange our trip."
"Gojo, we can't just leave!"
"Why not?" he looked deep into your eyes. "Why can't we just say 'fuck them'?"
You shook your head. "Maybe you could, Gojo, but not me! I would disgrace my clan!"
Gojo stood up abruptly. "This is our honeymoon! Your honeymoon! What they think doesn't matter! You're my wife now, those bastards have to respect you! Understand that!"
"It's not that simple." You could only whisper.
He shook his head. "Nevertheless let's go tomorrow. I'll write a letter to your mother and explain that I just took you with me."
He approached your seat. "You wouldn't be to blame."
As if she would think it wasn't your fault. They'd all curse you because then they wouldn't know where you two even were.
But wasn't that what you wanted?
"I'm going to sleep." Determined, you headed for your room. You needed to clear your thoughts.
"We can talk about it again in the morning. And maybe go straight away." He followed you to your door.
"There would be consequences." Something in your voice trembled. "Just running off like that."
And as you stood there, your door to your room already in your hand, he stepped right behind you. His body closer than ever.
Shouldn't Infinity be pushing you back? Why could you feel his warmth, almost feel his breath?
"I could handle that." His hand now held your door.
"I want to get to know you better too."
With that, he let go of your door and left you standing in the hallway, confused.
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starcurtain · 3 days
Note
Hello! I just saw your latest post and you might have been referring to my ask if it was the one about Ratiorine's differing philosophies or of what philosophies they abide by (existentialism, absurdism, etc) then that's me! If you weren't referring to that I apologize for the confusion. Sending it off anon this time so maybe it doesn't disappear 🥲
Sorry for the ask disappearing the first time; I'm not sure what happened, and I was so sad because I had been carefully holding on to it to answer it! I'm glad you were able to resend.
I do have to say first that philosophy is not my area of expertise, so there may be much more qualified philosophy buffs out there who can answer this more accurately than me, but I'll give it a go with my personal understandings of the characters:
First, Ratio is the easier of the two I think. As many people have said, he's a good fit for existentialism. His entire shtick is basically believing in the power of the individual to improve and enrich their own life, to fight valiantly regardless of the hardships imposed by their life's circumstances, and to make themself into a better person by their own choices.
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It's important to underscore that this means Ratio believes in self-determination, in the idea that people's lives are not foreordained but are actually actively shaped each day by personal decisions. Therefore, people have inherent freedom to decide the course of their own lives by accepting what they approve of, refusing to accept what they disapprove of, and harnessing their own individual power to ultimately achieve self-actualization.
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Essentially, Ratio works under the impression that life is not guided by something as intangible as destiny, and no matter where you start off in life, what ultimately happens to you is within your control (or at least within the control of whoever controls you). This is likely a small part of why it grates on him so badly that he wasn't recognized by Nous, because the fact that one can dedicate everything to a goal and still not achieve that goal runs contrary to his central philosophy.
If he believes that people have the power to determine the course of their own lives, then what does it say about him, who fought so hard to do exactly as he claims even idiots can do--seize control his own fate--and yet didn't succeed? Are there some things outside of man's power? It's enough to make even a renowned doctor question himself, and Ratio decided to come out on the side of "It's a personal failing, not a flaw in my philosophy." He literally said "Skill issue" to himself.
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Changing tack a tiny bit here, I think it's also important to emphasize that there is a difference between existentialism and nihilism even though these philosophies dovetail. Again, I'm not an expert in philosophy, so my understanding is very limited, but the basic idea of existentialism is that "existence comes before essence"--that is, things start as a blank slate and gain nature and meaning after the fact. We are not created by some grand design, nor is there any inherent "purpose for living." Things just exist because they exist.
This is where existentialism intersects with nihilism, at the starting point that existence is inherently meaningless. But, in my personal opinion, nihilism as a philosophy fails to move beyond that. Pure nihilism is ultimately self-defeating because it leaves us with no motivation to commit to growth. It's a philosophy antithetical to the continuation of life as we know it. Existence is meaningless and any meaning you personally derive from existence is also meaningless, so why bother attempting to derive any meaning at all? This complete apathy is the Device IX that Star Rail paints as so dangerous.
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And Ratio is not this way at all. His philosophy absolutely reaffirms that life can have meaning, so long as people create that meaning for themselves. He simultaneously asserts that anything that people create is not meaningless ...which basically means that meaning itself cannot be meaningless. (If that makes any sense to anyone.)
Frankly, I would argue that this philosophy may be a core part of why Ratio has not been recognized by Nous so far, rather than simply his "being a good person." (Nous is a robotic AI super-computer, why would THEY care about the presence or lack of human empathy?) Ultimately, Ratio's central philosophy about people being capable of determining their own fates and purposes also applies to his understanding of knowledge--knowledge is not something which is inherent in certain beings from birth or limited to the purview of the "special" (geniuses), but is attainable by all people. People are not "born talented" or "born untalented," they are simply "educated" or "uneducated," with the only barrier between these categories being one's own personal willingness to change. The mundane can become the divine--if they work hard enough at it.
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Thus, knowledge is not wealth to be hoarded, but a currency to be spent to enrich other members of humanity.
(By the way, completely random aside--it also surprises me that everyone relates Ratio to Alhaitham from Genshin when they literally have such a glaring fundamental discrepancy in their understanding of the concept of wisdom... But anyway, back on topic!)
Ratio may (sort of) respect the members of the Genius Society, may recognize their incredible knowledge and abilities, but at the heart of the matter lies a single all-important question: Does Ratio even really believe in "genius" as a distinction (other than as a concept to insult himself)? Does he truly believe there is barrier between brilliance and idiocy that "ordinary people" can never cross?
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He speaks convincingly about geniuses being different from "the ordinary," but if his core belief is that people have the power to pull themselves up out of despair and achieve greatness through effort and self-development, rather than some form of luck or god-given talent at birth, then... do born "geniuses" even really exist? Is there really an insurmountable difference between brilliant and mundane?
If knowledge is the equalizer of all sentient beings, do we not all have at least the initial capacity to become geniuses?
I personally think this central distinction about the capacity for knowledge among all humanity is the actual deciding factor in Ratio's rejection from the Genius Society, because, at the end of the day... how do you become a member of the "Genius Society" when you fundamentally reject the distinction of "genius" as an exclusive category from the start?
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Ratio wants to share knowledge and uplift everyone (even if he thinks most people are starting off at the rock bottom known as idiocy).
His mission is diametrically opposed to the concept of a "Genius Society" in the first place.
He wanted in to the cool kids club because he desperately craves validation and acceptance, but the philosophical values of the Genius Society are ultimately incompatible with his own. In short, he would have to cease to be "Veritas Ratio" to succeed in joining the geniuses.
Okay, okay, back to the original point again, and just one more note about Ratio: Even though existentialism also goes hand-in-hand with absurdism, I don't think Ratio is far enough down the philosophical rabbit hole to believe in the wider definition of absurdism. Although I think he does agree with the inherent meaninglessness of existence, I don't think he views existence itself as truly irrational and the universe as as manifestation of unknowable chaos. I think he'd at least like to imagine that there are some ontological principles and inherent laws governing the operations of reality, and I think he does believe that certain things can be predicted with the application of enough thought... He certainly seems to believe in some form of "objective truth," at the very least.
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I think he'd at least like to believe the universe is semi-orderly, even if he might deep down admit this is also wishful thinking.
So, to me he reads as a strong metaphor for pure existentialism, with deliberate rejections to both nihilism's apathy and absurdism's lean toward solely subjective reality.
PHEW, this is already long and I still have a whole other character to talk about... I had more to say about this topic than I thought. Sorry for the long read!
Anyway... Aventurine.
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I've seen all sorts of things thrown around for Aventurine's philosophy, and while I think he does inherit a bit of Acheron's absurdism by the end of 2.1, I actually don't think Aventurine is an absurdist, an existentialist, or a nihilist.
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I think Aventurine is a struggling fatalist.
He doesn't like it. We see him actively question it, but ultimately, he does come back to the concept of destiny over and over.
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First, I think it's important to draw a clear distinction between Ratio and Aventurine: Ratio's existentialism is a philosophy that technically works even in a theological vacuum. Nous doesn't have to exist for Ratio's philosophy to function. Ratio's belief in the self-determination of humanity is, in fact, somewhat opposed to belief in aeons in the first place, and only works because technically the aeons of Star Rail used to be human (or were originally human creations). It's essentially an atheist viewpoint.
But Aventurine is a religious character. Like, he's just... religious. That's a fact about him. Even though we do hear his doubts, at the end of the day, he actually believes in Gaiathra, and believing in a omniscient supernatural being that is not human in origin (is from outside the aeon system) comes with a whole set of philosophical foundations that most aeon-worshipping characters just don't have in Star Rail. (Sunday is the obvious exception here, by the way.)
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Kakavasha's like the one practicing pagan in the middle of an atheist convention. Awkward.
Being more serious: Religion requires faith. Faith requires the ability to believe in things you cannot verify with empirical facts. To believe in things you can only feel, never see. The belief that a goddess is watching over you, blessing you, and guiding you requires you to also accept the idea that events in your life are not always in your own control--that some of what occurs to you is decided by powers beyond your comprehension.
In essence, faith requires belief in fate. And that leads to fatalism.
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No matter how much he doesn't like it, no matter how much we see him struggle with it, Aventurine does actually seem to believe in the concept of fate. He believes that some events in life are destined to occur, that some things are outside of individuals' control, and that ultimately not everything can be changed.
This is the dead opposite of Ratio's mindset: No matter how hard we fight, how far we push ourselves... in the end, sometimes people fail. Sometimes the only answer to our endless struggles is that we die, as we were destined to, before ever achieving the greatness we sought or the futures we were promised.
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As an aside, I don't think faith or religion are necessarily the only factors connecting Aventurine to this particular philosophy either. Even removing theological aspects from the conversation, his extreme focus on the gambling aesthetic suggests a strong connection to fatalism too--if not a goddess, then one's fate may as well be in the hands of luck itself, of the whims of the rolling dice--or the push and pull of "powers that be," those figures of authority in the room where it happens, who make their shady deals according to preset rules and expectations, every bet resulting in an ultimately predictable outcome.
(He keeps gambling and gambling, hoping that he'll get a different result than the one he knows is inevitable...)
This is, of course, an inherently pessimistic mindset, a perfect dark-mirror to Ratio's deep-down optimism. Fatalism puts humanity into a position of powerlessness. All hopes and dreams are given over to the goddess, by whose judgment and whims the actual events of one's life are decided. Pain and poverty are inevitable trials. Suffering and death are foreordained.
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And yet Aventurine has to cling to this, as much as he doubts it, as much as he hates the idea that things in his life are beyond his power to control.
Because if fate doesn't exist... If it wasn't destiny, if the tragedies of his life weren't trials from the goddess, if things weren't supposed to go this way... Then every single thing in his life really is meaningless. Everything he suffered, everyone he loved and loss, his mother's and sister's sacrifices, the torment he went through--just sheer bad luck. All of it, completely and utterly meaningless.
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How can you convince yourself to keep living, in the face of such supreme and all-encompassing Nihility?
This is the central struggle of Aventurine's character, the actual mental and emotional journey we see him undertaking from 2.0 to 2.1. He is literally on the precipice, swinging between a viewpoint that he hates--his fatalistic belief in destiny--and an entirely self-defeating philosophy--nihilism--whose only possible final outcome is suicide.
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This is what his talk with Acheron at the end of 2.1 is all about. This is how she saves him. In that final cutscene, we witness Aventurine reach a mental compromise, managing to finally reconcile his necessary faith in the concept of destiny with the reality that life may truly begin meaningless--but beginning meaningless does not mean staying meaningless, and believing in destiny does not bar you from making your own choices or finding your own purpose in life.
Later on in Penacony's story, we literally see Acheron use Ratio's philosophy to reject the same nihility that crept into Aventurine's:
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Acheron wards off nihility's apathy through an absurdism all her own, but one which manages to enclose both Ratio's and Aventurine's otherwise incompatible mindsets: We have no way of ever knowing for certain whether the events of our lives are fated or mere nonsense. We have no way of knowing if our choices are our own or foreordained. But we don't need to know this to find meaning and value in them. Whether life is nothing more than unpredictable chaos or a predetermined pattern of cause and effect, what matters is what you make of it.
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Ultimately, I think that this post has really helped me recognize just how well Aventurine and Ratio work as philosophical foils.
They really are perfect opposites.
Aventurine's fatalism is deterministic, while Ratio's existentialism is self-deterministic. Aventurine's philosophy is inherently pessimistic; Ratio's is inherently optimistic. Ratio's philosophy operates on a core belief in the freedom of humanity to decide their own paths in life, while Aventurine hates but does ultimately believe that people aren't really in control, that even if no gods are guiding us, we can't rise above our own natures. Ratio's philosophy makes meaning from growth; Aventurine's makes meaning from loss...
And they both struggle with fundamental doubts in their own philosophies, core questions that are directly tied to their own lives. Aventurine worries that his faith might be misplaced, that destiny might not exist, and that everything he suffered might have been in pointless, empty vain. Ratio faces the crisis of recognizing that his core belief in the power of humankind to determine their own paths and make their own meaning might not actually apply to everyone--because it doesn't seem to apply to himself.
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It's literally only by bridging this philosophical binary with Acheron's anti-Nihility absurdist rhetoric that we can reach some sort of healthy outcome. That's why it takes both Ratio's note and Acheron's comments to finally lead Aventurine to acceptance. Ratio probably needs a little bit of Aventurine's "If you didn't make it into the Genius Society, there's got to be a reason" mindset to finally reach some peace with his situation too.
I'm not even a philosophy expert and even I can see that there's really only one takeaway here: These two characters were totally written with each other in mind.
Aventurine and Ratio need each other on core metaphysical levels! 😂
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It's so good guys. You can't see it, but I'm making chef's kisses, I promise.
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ihavethedreamies · 3 days
Text
Her Hero | Lee Know
Lee Minho - Stray Kids
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Rating: M (18+) MDNI
Word Count: ~5k
Pairing: Podocheong! Lee Know x Noble! AFAB! Reader
(The Podocheong were like the police of Joseon Era Korea)
Genre: Historical AU!, Joseon Era, Reader-Insert, Fluff, Smut, Some Plot, Frenemies-to-Lovers (ish)
!!This is smut…if that much isn't clear you should probably leave now!! MDNI!
Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Swearing, Kissing, Pet Names (Sweetheart mostly), Fingering, First Times (Readers), Breeding Kink (kinda), Breathplay, A Single Spank, Masochist! Reader (surprise~!), Unprotected Sex (This is pre-birth control so…)
Summary: When a political rival of your father kidnaps you for a ransom, your father calls on the Podocheong (Police) to rescue you. An extremely handsome Bujang (Lieutenant) rescues you, but you would be loathe to admit you need (and like) a hero.
Author's Note: Here's Lee Know's!! Working on Changbin's, should be up very soon.
At the bottom I will have a guide for all the untranslated words I use, most of which are to do with the clothing they wear.
P.S. I'm having so much fun with these but I have to help watch our dog so she doesn't get on my uncle's furniture and so then I can't work on these during the day :\
Also, if any of my historical information/words are inaccurate, I apologize, I did the best with what research I could and what I know from watching too many historical K-Dramas.
-> Series Hub <-
-> Bang Chan's <-
Let me know if you want to be on the taglist!
I am cross-posting this on Archive. Please reblog! If you know anyone that would like this or future fics but they aren't on here my name and icon are exactly the same on the other site. Happy reading!
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Your father was an important man who did important things. Unfortunately, some people didn't like the things he did or the way he did them. Namely, the Right State Minister…your father was the Left State Minister, so they should work together. No. They hated each other. Even more so because your father refused to let you marry the other Minister's son. That made the other man's son hate you…for some reason, like you had any say in the matter. You didn't even know the guy existed till your father told you he had prevented your marriage.
One day, as you waited by the entrance to your family's estate, you draped a sseugaechima over your head, waiting for your brother to join you. He was going to escort you to your friend's house, and you were getting impatient.
"Sorry!" He dashed through the courtyard, leaning down and panting to catch his breath. When he stood, the top of his gat wacked you on the chin and you flinched back.
"Sorry!" He floundered, peeling the head covering off so he could look at your annoyed face for any injury. He was such a klutz but at least he tried to make up for it.
"Let's just go please, orabeoni." You sniffed, recovering your head and you left the estate grounds. Your older brother weaved through the crowd, you held onto the belt of his hanbok to make sure you didn't get separated. There must have been some kind of big event or something going on because there were people everywhere.
"Ah, wait!" You cried out, someone bumped into you hard, and you let go of your brother.
"(Y/N)?" He turned around, his height allowing him to look over most of the crowd, but your own height hid you more. You were shoved and pushed as people whirled around you and called his name out.
"(Y/N)!" He shouted, but before you could reply, something hit you hard in the back of the head and you saw black.
~~~
When you woke up, you hurt. Your head hurt the most, but your whole body was sore. As your senses returned, you looked around in confusion. You were in a bedroom of what looked like an inn or other kind of lodging. Sitting up from the bed, you rubbed at the back of your head, looking around. Did your brother find you? If so, why did he bring you to a lodging rather than just back to your home? He also wasn't in the room. Did you pass out and a random person bring you here till you woke up? At the other side of the room, on the other side of a folding divider, you heard the door open. Unfortunately, it was not your brother that came in, you actually had no idea who it was. He was dressed all in black and his face was even covered.
"W-who are you?" You backed up on the bed, back hitting the wall, like that would really be of any use. He didn't say anything, but he pulled out a dagger and you froze in shock. Logically, you knew you could scream, but you couldn't physically get one out. He stalked forward and you closed your eyes, waiting for the worst. You squeaked when he grabbed your hair, right above where your daenggi was tied, and…cut your hair. He left as quickly as he came, the end of your hair along with the ribbon in his hand. What? Reaching around, you brought your hair over your shoulder to look at where he cut, nearly half of the length was gone.
"That-" you were madder more than anything else. Couldn't he have just undone the ribbon to use as proof? It was clear he didn't want to hurt you because you were in a nice room, not tied up, and other than a throbbing spot on the back of your head, you were unharmed.
After what felt like around an hour of sitting in the corner, contemplating what to do, you got up to look around. You weren't sure about trying to escape. Just because you were unhurt up until then didn't mean your captor would be so merciful if you tried to leave. Plus, you might get more hurt escaping, you were pretty sure you were on a second or even third floor. Just to check though…nope, the window shutters were locked from the other side it seemed. Plus, obviously, so was the door. Great. As time ticked by, you messed with the various objects of décor, trying to prevent boredom. Didn't work. All the drawers were empty and there wasn't even a baduk board for you to mess around with. After being nosy even more, you found a book wedged in the back of a dresser, between the back panel of the drawer and the piece as a whole. You weren't sure how it got back there and when you finally yanked it out, you sighed.
"Better than nothing." It was some old romance book that had been there for probably at least ten years. Sitting at a table in the room, you started the read, not really enjoying it, but it was better than nothing. More time passed and you were glad there was at least a separate room with a chamber pot, but it was getting dark. Your stomach rumbled and you wondered just how long you had been out cold because you and your brother had left the estate fairly early in the morning. When night fell, you found a lantern but had no way to light it. So, you had to sit in the dark, only the faint light of the moon flowed in through the slits of the locked shutters. Sitting back on the bed, your stomach growled again, and you sighed, laying down. You might as well pass time with sleep.
~~~
You were startled awake when there was a loud commotion outside of not just the lodging but also your room. Getting up from the bed you went to try and look through the slats of the windows but couldn't see much. There was a loud crash, and you turned around just in time to see the door break into pieces as someone kicked it open, not even bothering to try and unlock it first. It was the Podocheong! The man that came in had the uniform of a Bujang, and he sighed in relief upon seeing you. Another officer came in then, taller than the man who had kicked the door in.
"We believe we arrested all of the perpetrators, sir." He bowed slightly to the lieutenant, and he nodded, waving him off.
"Are you okay, Lady (Y/N)?" He came forward, brow furrowed in worry, looking over you. You shrunk under his gaze, embarrassed, hiding your face. His hands went to your jaw, making you look at him so he could see if your face was harmed. Your cheeks felt hot under his thumbs, he was strikingly attractive, but also familiar.
"When your brother couldn't find you, he came straight to me." He told you, letting you go, and you nodded, stepping back, looking away again. He then realized how intimate his action had been, and he bowed, apologizing.
"Are you friends with my orabeoni?"
"Yes, my lady. When we both got to your estate to look for you, your father informed us that a ransom letter had been sent for your safe return. I apologize for not getting here much sooner." You shook your head, casting a glance up at him, not sure if you were allowed to really show him your face.
"Here." He removed his jeonbok, draping it over your head so you could hide under it. Thanking him gently, you pulled it down over your more, it smelled like him, which was amazing.
"Let's get you home."
"W-what is your name?"
"Minho of the Lee clan, my lady."
~~~
When you returned home, not just your mother and brother were in tears like you expected, but your father was as well. He wasn't cold normally, but he just had better control of his emotions.
"Thank you, hyungnim." Your brother bowed to Bujang Minho, still sniffing a bit.
"Yes, we cannot begin to express our gratitude, Bujang." Your father thanked him as well and you let your mother lead you further into the estate so she could hug you. You hugged her tightly back, incredibly grateful to be home safe.
~~~
You weren't sure what Minho had asked of your father in return for rescuing you, but he seemed to be hanging around a lot. While, yes, he was mostly with your brother, you would always find him watching you if you happened to be around or passed by. One day you were sitting at the edge of your family's pond under a parasol, messing around with some embroidery work. You were not very good at it even though you enjoyed it.
"Is that supposed to be a flower?" You heard a teasing remark to your side, and you sent a glare at the owner, but, it was not your brother. Quickly, your face reddened, and you looked back down.
"U-uh yes, but as you can see, I am a little poor at this." You huffed a nervous laugh.
"Then why are you doing it?"
"I like it, just-" You yelped when you poked yourself with the needle, quickly putting the tip of your finger in your mouth. Setting the frame on the ground and putting the needle back in the cushion, you ran a finger over the messy stitching.
"What else do you like to do?" You froze when he sat down next to you, not close enough to touch you, but you weren't expecting it. He wasn't in his Podocheong uniform, the light greenish-blue fabric of his hanbok complimented him well. Looking away from where the material seemed to be struggling over his chest, you cleared your throat.
"I enjoy painting, but once again, I'm not great at it."
"Is there anything you enjoy that you are good at?" You saw him tilt his head to rest it on his fist, elbow resting on his knee, from the side of your eye.
"I…" You were a little stumped.
"N-not really." You enjoyed creative and artistic work, but you were not skilled in the field.
"That's not what your brother told me." Your eyes widened and you shot him a wary look.
"Your father isn't even here." Minho rolled his eyes, and you clenched your jaw. He was kind of getting on your nerves. Mostly because he was stupidly attractive, and you didn't like being teased to begin with.
"I haven't shot a bow in years." You whispered, still weary.
"Worried a man won't want to marry you if you can fight?"
"Archery isn't fighting, and I'm not worried about that." You stood up then, leaving the parasol jabbed in the ground, gathering up your frame and embroidery basket, walking around him to head back to your room.
"Let's go do it." He caught up to you, walking backwards, smirking as he walked ahead of you.
"No." It was too risky, you got caught last time your brother took you to his make-shift archery range.
"We can go to the Podocheong training area, no one will know. No one's there now." You had reached the stairs to get up onto the deck of your house, and you halted at the bottom. The offer was extremely tempting…
"Fine, let me get something to change into."
With a bundle of your brother's old clothes in tow, Minho helped you sneak off the estate grounds. He had at least told your brother, so no one thought you got kidnapped again. Your father didn't check on you after dark so he wouldn't know you weren't in your room. After you arrived at the training grounds, you changed in a bathing room and came out.
"You really look like your brother like that." Minho scoffed and you rolled your eyes.
"I know." You sniffed and he led you toward the back where the archery targets were set up. Without waiting for his prompt, you looked over the different bows on the rack and picked one, then grabbed a quiver as well. It felt instantly familiar, and you were glad for that, but your aim was rusty.
"You're supposed to hit the middle." Minho hummed next to you, pointing to where you had hit off to the side quite a bit.
"I know." You grit your teeth, shooting off another arrow and it missed as well. Was it the bow?
"Here." He moved to adjust your grip on the bow, and you yanked away from his hold.
"I don't need your help." You were embarrassed because you said archery was something you were actually good at.
"You did a few weeks ago." The little string of control you had snapped, the fire of your annoyance singing the ends, and you turned to him, glaring at him straight in the eye.
"What, you want me to say thank you? After my father showered you with gifts and allowed you to loiter around our estate? Fall to my knees in gratitude to my hero? Huh? If you want that go to another girl." You turned back away from him, not noticing his amused grin and you shot another arrow, hitting the red bullseye.
"What?" You nearly growled, standing at the door to your room's building, having opened it to find Minho leaning on the wooden column next to the stairs. He was relentless for the next few weeks, and you were really pissed. More so that you missed when he wouldn't show up with that stupid smirk on his pretty face. Why were you starting to like him when he just teased you all the damn time? Wasn't he your brother's friend? He constantly pestered you to go shoot with him, or go ride on his horse, or some other stuff, and you said no to almost everything. You would only eat with him if he brought snacks or a meal because who says no to food?
"I think you dropped this." You looked to see your eunjangdo dangling from his index finger.
"Give it!" You swiped at it, but he held it up and back behind him so you couldn't reach it. The silver shined in the sun, and you jumped to grab it, falling onto him when you couldn't make it.
"Give it back!" You pressed against him more, fingers barely touching the sheath of the dagger.
"Hm, no." He chuckled and you yiped when he wrapped his other arm around you, holding you to him. Your face bloomed with heat, and you could even see the red on the tip of your nose when you looked at his face, very close to yours.
"I really should stop helping you if you don't want a hero so bad." He finally relented and brought the dagger back down, but he didn't let you go. He was warm against you, and you could feel the muscle he had underneath the layers of clothes and even through your own. Your head was swimming, and you didn't even move to grab your eunjangdo from him when it was within reach.
"Have you heard the rumor about the watermill behind your house by the stream?" Instantly you knew what he was talking about.
"Y-You!" Your face's redness changed from embarrassment to rage, and you pulled away from him, slapping him hard, then turning on your heel and going back inside, the silver dagger still dangling in his grasp.
You didn't want to admit why you were crying, but you held the cushion to your chest closer, pressing your tear-stained face into the pink silk. You weren't overly fond of romance and sweet gestures, but the crassness of his suggestion hurt. Did he only want to bed you and then move on? You hoped deep inside he liked you back. And it wasn't until you cried for a good hour that you realized why you were so upset. You liked him. That’s why you wanted him to like you back.
"Dammit." You sniffed, wiping hard at your face with your sleeve.
"(Y/N)?" A soft voice called from just outside your window, only moonlight coming in through it, one small candle illuminating your room softly.
"(Y/N)? I know you're awake." You registered the owner of the voice, and you deflated further into your cushions.
"Go away." You spat at him.
"(Y/N), please?" Minho's tone was like nothing you had heard before, and it was beginning to compel you.
"No." He could probably hear the insincerity in your voice.
"(Y/N), sweetheart, please?" Your heart stopped, then sped into a gallop when he called you that. Your body seemed to act at the will of your heart and not your brain, because you got up, using a step stool, and opened the window. He smiled, genuinely, and it made you swallow hard. You wanted to cry again.
"I'm so sorry." He stepped forward, the window just the right height for him to rest his arms on the sill from where he stood on the porch. You didn't say anything, you were worried you would burst into tears if you tried.
"I said something horrible; I was just trying to tease you and I hurt you. Will you forgive me?" You hadn't heard such a sincere tone from him since he rescued you at the lodging. Your uncertain gaze met his intense one and he sighed.
"What you said awhile back made me think. You said that your father showered me with gifts for saving you? He didn't."
"But…orabeoni said you got confections and a bunch of other stuff."
"That was from him and your mother. Your father had a different gift, but I told him I didn't want it. Not without you agreeing." What?
"Huh?" He smiled at the clear confusion all over your face, the sad look falling off.
"Your father offered you as a gift. As my wife. I said yes, but I wanted to court you first. I didn't do a great job though I guess." Minho sighed and you couldn't hold back then, tears spilling over your cheeks.
"(Y/N)?" He stood up straight and you stepped closer, and he gently cupped your cheek in his hand.
"You should have just said so, you stupid idiot." You hitched a sob with each word, and he smiled, letting out a small laugh.
"Yes. I should have."
~~~
It seemed, to Minho even more than you, the wedding couldn't have been soon enough. It was also hard to hide from your family just how clingy he was. If no one was around, his arms were around you at the very least. He had you sit in his lap while you did most things, his chin on your shoulder, watching you sew or read. More than just a few times he would be standing next to you or hugging you and his hand would sneak lower than he really should have put it. The first time he got a not-very-strong hit to his chest, and he just chuckled.
You were a bit sad to move out of your family home, but you and he were given your own separate house on his father's estate, so far on the edge of the land that it felt like your own. As you stood in your new bedroom, dressed only in your sokchima, flinching at every noise as if it was your… You giggled finally thinking of him as your husband, and you hopped a little with glee. Every noise though made you hope that it was him, returning from his own bath, but most of the time it was just an animal outside, or the wind making the window shutters creak slightly.
Finally, the door to the bedroom opened and he peaked his head in, a serious look on his face.
"Are you ready, (Y/N)? Because I'm running out of restraint." The sharp look in his eyes made you shiver, but you nodded anyway. As he stalked in, the door falling shut behind him, he tugged at the goreum of his sokjeogori, and time slowed down as it fell to the floor. Your eyes skated over the skin that he revealed, and you didn't have time to react, he scooped you up in his arms and easily carried you to the bed. He pinned you to the yo, raised onto a platform and you gasped as his lips sealed over yours. His hand snuck under your head, fingers weaving through your hair at the base of your braid, pressing you even closer to him.
His other hand wandered, snaking up your leg, pushing your sokchima up higher and higher. Feeling his hands on your bare skin made you shiver despite the heat he seemed to be setting. You panted when he finally pulled his tongue out of your mouth, licking his lips like a hungry dog. His eyes though reminded you of a cat on the hunt.
"How rough can I be?" Minho's lips brushed the skin of your neck as he spoke, then his mouth attached, and he sucked hard. You huffed at the feeling; mind not able to stay on track for very long.
"Huh?" You finally managed to get out, hands balled into fists over his shoulders, your pulse seeming to thud harder where he had sucked the skin nearly raw.
"I've been waiting to have you so long, sweetheart, that I just want to breed you like a bitch in heat." The vulgarity of his words shocked you, but it somehow fueled your arousal rather than offending you.
"I want to brand you as mine." He licked a path over your throat, ending at the hickey he had left under your ear. His blunt nails dug into the flesh of your upper thigh as he pulled it up to his waist, his hand sliding down to cup your rear.
"M-Minho-!" You couldn't help but throw your head back with an airy moan as he rolled his hips against yours, his hard cock pressing to your bare core through his pants.
"Tell me now, so I can slow down." You could hear the strain in his voice, his breathing was hard too.
"Don't." So, he didn't. He didn't hesitate either and you squeaked when he rolled you over underneath him, landing on your stomach. Instead of untying your sokchima like a civilized person, he tore the straps at the seams, then yanked the white garment from you and tossed it to the side, leaving you completely naked. Your skin immediately rose into goosebumps from the sudden chill, but the heat of his bare chest pressing to your back instantly took over.
"You're just perfect." He hummed, nearly laying completely on top of you, hard cock nestled in the crest of your butt. Minho's arm snuck under you, sliding up to nestle between your breasts, his hand gripping your jaw. You whimpered at the restraining feeling even though it was nowhere close to tight, and you felt his dick twitch at the noise. His free hand also snuck underneath you, holding himself up with pure core strength, only the elbow of the arm holding you supporting him. As his fingertips ran over your lower stomach you sighed, the muscles twitching at the stimulation. He hummed and you recognized the noise that he always made when he smirked, and your body jerked when his fingers finally met your cunt.
"So wet already, sweetheart." His nose nuzzled behind your ear, the hand at your jaw loosening even further but sliding down just a bit to cup your throat. Quickly, his index finger brushed over your clit, and you whined, and he chuckled, feeling the vibration at his palm.
"M-Minho…" Your head was swimming, and you let out a choking noise when he buried a finger into you.
"Don't worry sweetheart, I'll loosen your tight cunt enough to take my cock." While Minho wasn't always outstandingly proper with you, his crass words still surprised you some. They went straight to your core though, and he felt your gummy walls spasm around the single digit. Slowly, he pumped his finger till you relaxed, the slight sting from the entrance dissipating. You had never even used your own fingers and based off what you felt nestled into your backside, you did need to get prepped. Whether it was on purpose or not, when Minho finally added a second finger, his hand at your throat tightened just enough to put slight pressure on your windpipe. Your cunt spasmed again, harder, and your heart sped up as well, wondering why the sensation excited you so much.
"Oh?" He chuckled, speeding up his hand at your pussy, palm pressing to your throat a bit harder. His palm pressed at your clit and a strong pulse hit your core, and it was getting stronger and stronger.
"W-wait, Minho!" You gasped, having an idea that you were close even if you had never felt it. The intensity startled you a bit.
"Go ahead, (Y/N), fall apart." The hand at your throat pressed enough to make your vision swim and you keened out a moan as you came. He huffed at the squeeze on his fingers, but helped you ride the high out, kissing behind your ear as he did. When he unwrapped his arms from around you, you fell limp on the bedding, still trying to catch your breath. Swallowing a few times to ease the slight soreness of your throat, you heard him shuffle. You, however, had no time to look behind you at him before his hands were on your hips, pulling them up, forcing your butt up in the air.
"What are you-?"
"I said I wanted to breed you like a bitch in heat." Oh, he meant it literally. Unfortunately for you, he hadn't given you the chance to see him bare, because you were not prepared for when he brought the head of his cock to your entrance.
"Breathe, sweetheart." His hands wrapped around your waist, thumbs rubbing circles into the skin of your back, and you focused on measured breaths as the fat head of his dick finally started to press in. Stinging heat seared through you from your core out as he entered, and you couldn't tell what it felt like. Somehow it hurt like hell but also felt so good, so much so you thought you might pass out. You fisted the bedding below you, gasping for air as he slid in, the slick of your arousal aiding the entrance.
"Your cunt's hugging my cock so good~" Minho sighed, the noise turning into a groan as he buried even further. How much further would he go? The searing heat was so deep you wondered if he would stop anytime soon.
"Just a bit…" He chuckled when he finally bottomed out, the tip pressing snugly to the base of your womb. Tears had sprung to your eyes, your whole face felt hot, and you panted hard, trying to get used to the odd feeling. Yes, it hurt, but it felt so much better than you thought it would.
"Tell em when you're ready, my love." He leaned over you again, kissing your shoulder gently and petting your hair.
"Go." You answered almost immediately, and his soft touches halted.
"Love, are you sure?"
"Fuck, please!" You weren't sure why you needed him to start already, logic told you it would hurt, but you craved it. It felt so dirty to like the burn so much, but you couldn't help it.
"Yeah?"
"Please!" Your breath was forced from your lungs when he rolled his hips, pulling out halfway before snapping back into you, hard. He felt your core pulse around him, a rush of your arousal soaking his cock, and he grinned like a madman.
"So fucking perfect." He immediately began a brutal pace, but still held back some, only pulling out half before driving his cock back home, battering your womb.
"W-wait, oh! Ah! Fuck!" The same waves of pleasure were already cresting, so much stronger than before and Minho relished in feeling the clench of your gummy walls around his cock instead of his fingers.
"So good." He mumbled to himself, licking his lips and as you got closer…
"Fuck!" You squealed when his hand came down on your ass, leaving a red print on your skin and you came again. He gasped a laugh as your arousal drenched his cock and his groin, leaving a shining trail down both your thighs. Minho laughed at your whine of disapproval when he pulled out, but it turned to a gasp as he flipped you over. He threw one of your legs over his shoulder, ankle at his ear, holding the other to his side, and he filled you again. Your vision spotted from the stinging pleasure the overstimulation was causing you, but you focused on his gorgeous face. He had that cocky smirk on his face, sweat beading down from his forehead and you whimpered at the sight. With what little strength you had, you propped yourself up to see where he was splitting you open. Whether it was the sight or his next thrust, you fell back limp and fisted the sheets as he fucked you like a rabbit. His shallow movements were even harder than before, and your eyes rolled back, back arching as your next orgasm rose.
"Oh, what a good girl, cum for me, love." Minho took your hands in his, your legs barely wrapping around him to hold on. His fingers wove through yours, lips meeting once more as his pace stuttered. He must have felt your moan against his tongue as you came once more, the tight vice of your cunt spurred him over the edge as well. Your core burned even hotter as his cum filled you to the point where it spilled from you, mixing with your own. Your body went limp, and Minho hummed, kissing your forehead.
"I love you." He left little pecks all over your face and you giggled sleepily.
"I love you, too. I'm glad you saved me that day."
"No, (Y/N), I think you saved me."
Sseugaechima - this is the extra-skirt looking garment women would wear over their heads. Gat - this is the hat that noblemen would wear, more specifically the ones that were black and made of mesh. Orabeoni - more archaic/historical word for older brother to a girl. Hanbok - traditional/historical clothing, most people think of women's dresses, but men's clothes were called this as well. Daenggi - the ribbon that was tied around a unmarried girl's braid. Baduk - Korean word for the Chinese game of Go. Podocheong - essentially the Joseon era police. Bujang - a Lieutenant-level position in the Podocheong. Jeonbok - kind of like a long vest worn over a hanbok. Hyungnim - a more commonly used term historically for a man to an older brother or friend. Eunjangdo - a silver dagger that many women wore as an accessory, mostly nobles. Sokchima - basically a dress/skirt like under-garment. Goreum - the ties that fastened the top of a hanbok. Sokjeogori - a shirt worn as an undergarment. Yo - a Korean floor mattress.
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fuctacles · 2 days
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Just like Cinderella
happy bday to my Prince Charming @blasvemous M | 3.3k | crack treated seriously, meet cuteugly something, idiot4idiot, humiliation kink mentioned | Ao3
"Shit, fuck!" Steve lets himself have one last glance at his wristwatch, and of course, it instantly proves to be a mistake. 
He runs straight into someone's back, and it punches all the air out of his lungs. He's stunned for a second, and can barely hear a rushed apology. He thinks he mutters back 'No, it was my fault', and by the time he blinks back into reality and crouches to pick up his bag, the guy is gone. 
But not all of him. 
On the pavement, right under his bag, he finds a... something.
It's made of metal and intricate, and not his. He picks it up and straightens up quickly, in hopes of seeing the guy he ran into. There are a lot of people rushing about, though.
"Hey!" He picks up his pace again, hoping to spot the person he ran into. He remembers long hair and a mix of citrusy shampoo and cigarette smell. Not much else. Nobody turns their head as he runs through the morning crowd, so he stuffs the item deep into his bag and focuses on the initial goal of rushing to work. He can worry about this all later. 
On his break, he takes the thing out of his bag to take a better look. It looks well-made and could be expensive, but he has no idea what it could be. It reminds him of old egg beaters, but he doubts that's what it is. Maybe a toy? One of these educational puzzles for nerds, like a Rubik's cube? Or! It could be a replica of some sci-fi movie gadget. Like the sonic screwdriver that Dustin made.
He probably should just ask around. 
His usual go-to, the self-titled oracle and part-time scholar Robin Buckley, had no better ideas than him. She turned the thing in her fingers, cradling it delicately like an eggshell, while humming and hemming. 
"Looks like a tiny brace. Maybe for a york's paw? The guy could be a vet," she offers. 
"Maybe," Steve nods, not convinced at all. He doesn't want to think about a little dog with a broken paw somewhere out there, its bones unprotected. "I was thinking it could be a kitchen utensil?"
Robin puts it on the desk between them and stares at it intently. 
"Like what?"
"I don't know," Steve shrugs, embarrassed to share his idea. "Like an egg beater?"
Robin continues her loud thinking but in the end, leaves him with nothing. 
The thing weighs him down on his daily commute, waiting in the bottom of his bag for the day he finds its owner. Steve isn't even sure if he would recognize him. Them? After a week he wasn't even sure it was a guy. 
The workload doesn't give him a break either, and once Friday finally arrives, he makes a detour on his route home to grab a drink or two. After his first drink, he checks for any loose change he could put in the tip jar and his hand finds the Thing. He pulls it out with a sigh and puts on the bartop with a small clunk. As he reaches out to put what he's found in the jar, he hears a very concerning and loud choking sound. 
To his right, a long-haired guy is wheezing his lungs out, fist-punching his own sternum. Steve immediately leans over the empty stool between them and starts smacking his back to help.
"Jesus, you alright? Went down the wrong pipe?" He looks around the man, but all he sees is a glass of beer, so hopefully he didn't get a peanut lodged in his windpipe. 
The man lets out a really gross phlegmy cough, clears his throat, and takes a shuddering breath.
"I'm fine, I'm fine," he wheezes out. "Just, uh, you know. Didn't expect to just turn around and see, uh, that." He spares a tiny glance at the Thing in front of Steve. 
Steve immediately brightens up, hoping to finally get an answer to his predicament. He swiftly moves to the empty seat, drink and Thing sliding along the bar with him. He sees the man wince while he's still facing forward like he's afraid to take a proper look. He takes a drink of his beer, this time slow and cautious, and Steve can see the redness spreading from his cheeks down his throat.
"You know what it is?" Steve asks hopefully, leaning closer to him. 
The man freezes, and maybe it wasn't in his best manners to just sit down next to someone without asking, but it's already happened and Steve is kind of desperate. 
He gulps down the beer, no accidents this time, but his voice is still strained, when he asks incredulously:
"You don't?! No, you know, that actually explains it. Take them damn thing off the bar for the love of Merlin."
Steve, while taken aback by the sudden shift and being ordered around by a stranger, stuffs the Thing away from peering eyes. 
"Why? What is it? Something illegal?" Fuck, why didn't he think about that? 
But the man is shaking his head.
"No, but I'm pretty sure the bartender wouldn't appreciate it."
"What is it?" Steve presses on.
The guy finally turns to him and Steve can see him in all his glory. Black leather, long hair, and a pair of truly soft brown eyes that don't match his overall vibe at all. And they stare right at him like they are trying to look straight into his soul. He's searching for something for a long, drawn-out moment, before he deflates, eyes skirting away, but he keeps facing Steve. 
"Really?" he mutters, mostly to himself. "It's a fucking cock cage, man."
"A fucking cock what?" Steve asks once he gets his voice back.
"You heard me. I'm not repeating myself," he says with a scoff, eyes falling to Steve's bag. His knee starts jumping up and down restlessly. "Where did you find it?"
But Steve had questions of his own.
"Is it like, a medical thing?" he asks. 
The looks he gets back would make him believe an alien just popped out of his forehead and started dancing Macarena. He frowns defensively.
"What? I've never seen something like this!" 
"It's a sex thing," the man responds mercifully, watching him closely. 
Now it's Steve's turn to gauge his eyes at the man. He looks briefly down at his bag like the thing could just grow tentacles and have its way with him. 
"How? Why?" he asks, mouth twisting at the images flashing in his mind. "How do you know that?"
The knee never stops jumping. If anything, it becomes more erratic. 
"Uh, I know guys who are into it." The man looks away again. 
Steve rolls his eyes. Sure. He knows a guy.
"So since you know some guys," he plays along. "Maybe they know more guys and they could ask around if anyone has lost one of these?" he suggests. "Now I want it off my hands even more."
The man scoffs, almost amused. 
"Could imagine. I could take it from you and just hand it over to them, make things easier for you," he offers, glances at him, and then shrugs.
Steve recoils at the idea.
"That? No, It's my fault the guy lost it, I wasn't looking and ran into him. I need to make sure it goes back to the right hands."
The man hums, drumming his fingers against the bar. 
"I want to be there when you ask random people if they are missing their cock cage."
Steve presses his lips together. 
"Stop saying that."
"What?" He tilts his head, looking amused. "Cock cage? Like the cock cage you have in your bag?"
"Yes. That."
He raises his hands placatingly. 
"All I'm saying is I would be embarrassed as fuck if I was the idiot who lost it. Would be hard to come forward and admit it," he says, raising his shoulders. 
Steve huffs, slumping against the bar.
"Fuck, you're right."
"I know," the man murmurs back and they quietly sip their drinks. 
"There must be places where it isn't that weird to admit it," Steve thinks out loud. He looks to his bar companion for confirmation but he's frowning at the liquor display in front of him, lost in thoughts. Steve hopes they aren't about him. The guy had a good profile and a cute nose.
"Hey." He nudges him gently with an elbow. 
"Hm?" The man turns, his frown melting away so he can raise his eyebrows curiously.
"Do you know any fetish places where I could leave a poster or something?"
The man only stares at him blankly. 
"You're gonna make posters," he states more than he asks.
"If I have to." Steve shrugs. 
"You sure you don't want me to just take it off you?"
"Nope."
"We could exchange numbers and I'll let you know when I find the owner."
Steve thinks about that. 
"You could lie, though," he points out. 
He huffs, annoyed. 
"I totally absolutely could," he agrees with a resigned nod like using logic pains him. Then, he sighs. "I could buy it off you?" he finally offers. 
Steve's taken aback.
"Why do you want it so badly?" He frowns at him.
"I just want to do you a favor, man!" He rolls his eyes. He's almost angry and 100% done with this conversation, it seems, as he downs the rest of his drink and slides off the barstool. 
"Tomorrow at ten, in front of the bookstore on John Paul. Bring your silly posters and I'll show you some kink shops and bars."
Steve blinks at him.
"That okay?" the man asks, tongue darting out to lick his dry lips. 
Hesitantly, Steve nods. 
"I guess that's my best shot. Thanks, man."
The guy nods.
"Don't mention it."
Then he turns and leaves, hands buried deep into his pockets, and Steve realizes he hasn't even asked for his name. 
He regrets not taking the guy on his offer to take the thing off him when he had the chance. Because he wouldn't be stuttering his way through explanations while his temporary companion revels in his embarrassment like it's the gods' nectar. 
At least now he knows his name is Eddie. 
Eddie pretends to be interested in the little display of nipple rings while Steve tries to convince the shop owner to hang his little poster saying "fetish gear found". The man finally yields, as do two others, thus concluding the number of sex shops in the area. 
"The bars don't open until late but we can try the Hangover before we part."
"What's that?" Steve asks, following Eddie anyway.
"Also a bar, but they serve hangover food around noon. They have the best bacon and won't tell me where they buy it from." He frowns like it's some personal feud. 
"Perfect. I can buy you lunch for helping me." Steve grins at him.
Eddie seems surprised at first but then smiles widely. 
"I won't say no to free food. This way, my good man!"
The place is a hole in the wall but really cozy. It seems like the same guy who took their order is cooking it and there's only one other person, with a coffee refill in front of them and a plate of... something unrecognizable under every possible sweet topping. 
"I gotta show this place to Robin, she'll love it," Steve comments while looking around. The inside looks like It was never fully finished or whatever purpose it served previously didn't require it. The walls are rough bricks, the windows old and probably drafty, and the only part of the floor that isn't rough cement is the dancefloor. 
But the collection of LED signs, mismatched couches, and a sunflower mural softened the rough interior. Steve will definitely come here again.
They get their own jug of coffee and Eddie pours for both of them.
"Girlfriend?" he asks with a raised eyebrow. 
Steve rolls his eyes in a very tired way and Eddie almost chokes on his surprised laugh. 
"Geez okay, not a girlfriend then."
Steve chuckles dryly. 
"Nope, just my best friend. We play for different teams."
Eddie eyes him curiously but he doesn't elaborate on that. He clears his throat. 
"Well, in that case, I should tell you that all the places I've shown you today are queer-friendly."
"This included." The chef must have heard that last sentence. He places their food on the counter. "There you go, little gays, bone apéritif."
"I'm pretty sure that's not how it goes," Eddie murmurs, immediately snatching a piece of bacon off his hash browns. 
"It is how it goes if you want more free coffee," says the chef as he turns around. 
"Your French is immaculate, Benjamine!" 
Steve makes an ugly snort at Eddie's terrible French accent. The man seems to be very proud of his little theatrics.
For a moment it's just the sound of forks against plates and the distant radio playing in the kitchen. Eddie finishes first, almost inhaling his food like he's a human vacuum, and pours himself more coffee. 
"You wanna go to the bars too? Later?"
Steve chews on his bite thoughtfully. 
"I think if you give me the addresses I'll be good to go on my own. You've already done so much, man."
Eddie is stunned into silence. This is not the answer he wanted. He licks his rapidly drying lips, looking for a good excuse to keep tagging along. 
"Uh, are you sure?" 
"Yeah, don't worry about it. You've wasted so much time on me today. I don't want to completely ruin your weekend." Steve smiles at him. 
"It's not a problem, really—"
"No, man, I wouldn't feel okay dragging you around." Steve shakes his head. 
"First of all, I'm dragging you around," Eddie huffs. "Second of all, it's the first time a man this pretty spent so much time with me and hasn't run for the hills. Let me have this."
Steve frowns at that information.
"You must have shit luck with men." 
"Tell me about it," Eddie murmurs into his coffee. 
"So it would be a date?" 
Eddie turns to him, eyes wide. But Steve holds his gaze.
"I mean, it would be nice." Eddie tugs on his hair nervously. "We can do the posters thing and then just have fun for the rest of the night, no?" he offers. 
"Absolutely." Steve smiles reassuringly. 
"Awesome." Eddie grins.
Steve spends hours figuring out his outfit. It's his first official date with a man, he has to look good. He therefore makes the mistake of calling his best friend. He nods along as she tells him what exactly to put on (How she has memorized his wardrobe is a question he doesn't want answered.) and then clears his throat when she takes a breath. 
"What if I don't want to attract women?"
There's a pause and then—
"My my, Steven, finally going for it?"
"You could say that."
"Where are you going? A bar? What's the vibe?"
He sighs. 
'We're kind of bar hopping, he's showing me around the area."
"Back up, back up!" she yells in his ear. "We?! You're not just going out? You have a date?"
"Yeah," Steve more breathes than says. He has a date. It's slowly dawning on him.
"Who is he?" Robin asks impatiently and he can easily imagine her curling up in her armchair for gossip. 
"His name is Eddie—"
"Okay, sounds normal."
"—he has this long, wild hair, and tattoos—"
"Okay, less normal."
"—but he is normal. A bit awkward, kind of dorky, not at all how you'd expect a guy in a leather jacket to be."
"Huh. Okay, maybe I won't find you in a ditch somewhere. I want a call when you get back, no later than tomorrow morning. At noon, I'm calling the police."
Steve rolls his eyes fondly. 
"Of course, Robbie. But can we focus on the matter at hand?"
In the end, he goes the Freddie Mercury route, with a tank top that shows off his chest hair, and tight jeans. He throws a colorful shirt over it to fight off the night chill. Eddie looks pretty much the same as earlier, though his band t-shirt looks a bit tighter. 
"Steve," he sighs instead of a proper greeting and Steve's face falls. He looks down at himself. 
"What? Is it that bad?"
"Darling, you're gonna get eaten alive. How am I supposed to fight off all of the bargoers?"
Steve laughs in surprise, feeling himself blush.
"I guess you'll just have to hold on to me."
Eddie's eyes sparkle under the setting sun. 
"Don't have to tell me twice," he says, pulling Steve inside their first location. "I saved my favorite place for last. But we can stay wherever you feel like."
Eddie stays true to his word, parading Steve around like an arm candy, their elbows hooked together. Only on their second bar does he realize something is amiss. 
"You didn't bring your posters?" he asks curiously, cocking his head. 
Steve hums next to him, sipping on the colorful drink the bartender recommended.
"Do I need them?"
Eddie's visibly taken aback by the question. He frowns at Steve. 
"Didn't you want to find the owner?"
Steve nods, unfazed. 
"Yeah, and I did."
Eddie's face blanches. He opens his mouth before closing it abruptly, his frown deepening. 
"What? When?" he asks, barely containing his panic and immensely confused. 
"Earlier today." Steve shrugs. "Haven't given it back yet, though."
"Oh, thank gods." Eddie visibly deflates. Steve raises his eyebrows at that, so he rushes to add: "It's great that you found him so fast." He forces out a smile. "Who is it? Did he know what it was?" The poster was purposefully vague so the person calling in would have to say what they'd lost. 
Steve shakes his head, raising the drink to his lips to prolong the suspense just a bit more. 
"It's you."
Eddie's brain short circuits. He's stunned for too long for his forced laugh to work. 
"Hahah, what?" 
Steve smiles at him and since he's feeling extra merciless tonight, reaches out for the man's neck. Eddie looks close to fainting but Steve doesn't relent and rubs a thumb across his jugular, observing him shiver before he pulls him in by his nape. He leans in to press his nose to Eddie's skin, fingers digging into the roots of his hair, where lingers the smell of his shampoo. Artificial lemon and cigarettes. He must have taken a shower before going out. 
"You smell just like the guy I ran into that day," Steve explains close to his skin as he traces it with the tip of his nose. Slowly, he moves away. He's a bit worried he moved too fast, but Eddie's cheeks are red and his eyes are fixed on his mouth, so he relaxes back into his seat. "And if I had any doubts, your reaction just now dispelled them all," he finishes with a smirk. 
Eddie groans, hiding in his hands.
"This is the most embarrassing date in my life and once I wore my shirt inside out."
Steve laughs but reaches out to put his hand on Eddie's knee to weaken the blow. 
"Don't worry, it's working on me."
Eddie pushes his fingers apart to peek at him. 
"Really?"
"Surprisingly, yes." Steve nods. "I hope it works out, preferably long enough so I can tell about our first meeting at the engagement party." His smile turns wide and teasing. "We'll put Cinderella to shame."
Eddie groans, but it sounds more pained this time. 
"Careful," he says heatedly. "My humiliation kink is flaring up," he says, aiming for humor, but something new wakes up in Steve and he cocks his head with a fake pout.
"Poor baby. You wanna go hide your shame somewhere more private?"
Eddie presses his lips together, breathing deeply through his nose. 
"Can we?"
Steve finishes quickly his drink and slides off his bar stool. He feels the pleasant buzz of alcohol and Eddie Eddie Eddie. He leans in for a quick, impulsive peck against his pink lips.
"Of course." He grins. "Let's go."
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tpwk-formula1 · 2 days
Note
hi can i get a thin crust pizza with red sauce, jalapeños, onions, dr. pepper, and dessert pls?
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Lee-Lee's Pizzeria Menu
Thin crust brothers best friend Red sauce rough sex jalapenos always such a fucking brat onions I saw you being a little slut dr pepper dirty talk dessert yes
TW - rough sex, cumming on body, getting caught, angry sex, fighting, accused of cheating.
WC 1800+
AN - Okay so I got two Anon at roughly the same time with slight differences but I think they are from the same person so I combined them together. The other one asked for the same things minus the Dr. Pepper and Ollie Bearman so I went with him.
Y/N POV
"Get back here," Ollie seethed through clenched teeth making he turn around slightly to make eye contact with him.
"Oliver leave me alone. I'm going to Kimi's room. I just need some air," I tell Ollie softly knowing we had been fighting for the past hour just going in circles neither of us being willing to apologize.
"So you're just going to walk out in the middle of this conversation," Ollie deadpans making me cross my arms across my chest growing tired of this fight.
"Ollie, I love you to death, but we are getting nowhere. We've been running in circles for the past hour. I'm surprised we haven't gotten a noise complaint or had a Prema member come knock on the door. I'm gonna go to Kimi's room for an hour. Let's both clear our heads and we'll have a conversation when I get back," I tell him softly before turning on my foot and making my way out of the Baku hotel room before going a few doors down to my little brothers room.
I invited myself into his room using the key he had given me. When I step into the hotel room I'm shocked to find Kimi sitting in bed on his phone talking to our mom. When he looks up and catches my eye he raises a brow making me shake my head knowing I didn't wanna talk about Ollie and I's fight in front of our mom.
I'm next to Kimi talking to our mom about our travels when a soft knock rang through the room making me roll my eyes knowing it was Ollie not having the patience to wait.
"Olive- Oh hi Dino," I awkwardly shift when I whip open the door getting ready to snap at Ollie but finding a confused Dino.
"Are you okay?" Dino asks softly making me roll my eyes and groan not wanting to mention the petty fight.
"It's nothing," I tell Dino stepping out of the door frame to let Dino in. When I go to close the door I find Ollie's head peaking out from our hotel room where he raises his brow at Dino coming into the room making me shake my head and close the door before going back into the room to say bye to our mom.
"Why are you here?" Kimi asks turning his attention to Dino when he hangs up the phone with our mom.
"No reason in particular, Arvid is busy so I thought I'd bug you," Dino says shrugging before plopping himself onto the couch. Kimi just shrugs his shoulders not really shocked.
"You're not gonna ask why I'm here," I scoff jokingly making Kimi look at me with the straightest face possible.
"I heard you and Ollie going at each other's throats when I came back from the Prema garage. So I'm assuming you just needed space," Kimi says seriously making Dino look at me in shock. Ollie and I have never been a couple to fight so I can see how it was shocking for Dino.
I sit on my phone while the boys talk before telling them bye and making my way back into Ollie and I's shared room.
"Awe my favorite whore is back," Ollie says the second I open the door making me stop dead in my tracks. I debate on just leaving again given Ollie hasn't calmed down in the slightest and now I'm pissed all over again.
"Come again?" I question hoping some sense hits Ollie dead in the face.
"Oh don't be dense I saw you being a little slut. You said you were going to Kimi's room to clear your head, not to hang out with Dino," Ollie says making everything click. He thought I was alone in Kimi's room before inviting Dino in. Kimi and Ollie always said hi once they got back from the garage but Kimi didn't stop in today because he had heard us fighting.
"Whatever you think happened didn't," I tell Ollie softly realizing this could be bad.
"Are you sure? Cause from my end you left to clear your head in you brother's room which happens to be empty and then a few minutes later I hear the door down the hall open and what do you know it's you happily invited Dino in," Ollie says letting his voice grow loud with each word.
"Kimi is back," I tell him softly. Ollie just rolls his eyes before making a few strides towards me before he pushes me against the wall.
"I'm supposed to believe that?" Ollie scoffs not believing the truth.
"Yes, I would never do anything like that," I tell him before Ollie rolls his eyes and leans down before crashing his lips onto mine.
"I guess I have to show you who you belong to," Ollie tells me with venom in his voice before he grips me in the back of the head and drags me to the bed where he roughly pushes me onto the bed.
When he climbed into bed he discarded his shirt before working on my clothes next. When I'm left completely bare Ollie instantly starts trailing his kisses from my lips down to my neck where he leaves a faint hickey before whispering, "Mine."
Ollie finally settles on my tits before taking a few nips at my nipples making sure I can feel his teeth but not hard enough for me to complain about it.
"Ollie please," I beg trying to grind my hips up into Ollie's crotch trying to gain friction but Ollie has other ideas cause he pushes me back down telling me to behave.
"Who made you this wet?" Ollie asks when he comes face to face with my soaked pussy. What? I can't help but love when Ollie gets like this. It was rare, but oh so good when it happened.
"You, Ollie please," I whine needing some kind of stimulation.
"Are you sure," Ollie asks with a raised brow making me throw his a serious face before nodding.
"Yes, I'm all yours Ollie. Always yours," I tell him softly making him hum in satisfaction.
When Ollie starts leaving wet kisses all over my thighs I can feel my clit start to throb before he finally moves his mouth towards my pussy when he trails his tongue from my hole to my clit collecting as much as my pussy juice before he moans softly just from tasting me.
When Ollie pulls my clit into his mouth I instantly become a moaning mess under him.
"So good," I moan which instantly grew louder when he slips two of his long fingers into my pussy making sure to hit my G-spot with each thrust.
"Oh fuck," I moan becoming quickly overwhelmed with all the pleasure coursing through my body.
"Ollie, I'm close," I moan softly stuttering from the intense pleasure.
"Hold it," Ollie groans into my pussy not letting up his movements only bringing me closer to the edge.
"I can't," I whine when I feel myself oh so close to the edge.
It was inevitable, but the second the words left my mouth I started cumming all over Ollie's fingers and tongue.
"God, you never listen. Always such a fucking brat," Ollies says after helping me ride my orgasm out. When he pulled away he sent a firm slap down right on my pussy making me whine and try to close my legs not wanting another one.
"Keep your legs open," Ollie says while standing up from the bed. I watch him closely as he starts to strip his jeans and briefs making my mouth water slightly.
When Ollie climbs back into the bed he almost instantly slips his cock right into my pussy making me gasp at the intrusion.
"Ollie, fuck," I moan, making Ollie groan feeling my pussy clench tightly around his thick cock.
"So big, baby," I whine while feeling Ollie start to thrust into my pussy.
"God, you're so fucking tight," Ollie groans leaning his face down into my neck to give it a soft nip.
"Ollie," I gasp out when I feel Ollie bring his hand down to my clit to bring me more pleasure.
"I can feel you clenching me on my cock baby. Does Dino make you feel this good?" Ollie spits out making me whine.
"Ollie, you know damn well I didn't fuck him," I stutter back still overwhelmed with pleasure.
"And for the love of God don't bring up another man while you fuck me this good," I snap at him making him chuckle softly before he double downs and starts fucking me even harder.
"I'm gonna cum," I announce before I start cumming all over Ollie's cock again. Cumming around Ollie's cock triggered Ollie to pull out and starts cumming ropes of his hot cum all over my tummy. Once he's done painting my body he slowly climbs out of the bed getting a rag to clean me up.
"I love you," Ollie whispers once he climbs into bed and pulls me into his chest.
"I love you too, but Ollie you need to listen before jumping to conclusions," I reply back softly while stroking his cheek.
"I know, I was just upset after quali and I know it's no excuse but then I saw you letting Dino in and it just broke my heart," Ollie tells me softly making me cuddle into his side more trying to resolve the issue.
"I promise Kimi was in the room. He said he heard us fighting so Im assuming that's why he didn't stop in and say hi," I tell him softly while tracing my fingers around his toned chest.
"Oh my God, you mean to tell me Kimi heard me yelling at his sister? I'm a fucking dead man walking," Ollie groans making me laugh.
"I'm sure if he felt like you would hurt me he would have come in, He has a key," I tell Ollie softly and as soon as the words leave my mouth our hotel door is opened by none other than my brother with a key.
"OH MY GOD," Kimi yells shielding his eyes as if Ollie and I weren't covered by a blanket.
"Don't be dramatic Adrea Kimi, what the fuck to you want," I ask pulling the blanket even further up my body feeling awkward.
"I just wanted to know if you guys wanted to come to dinner with Dino and I but I don't think I can sit through a dinner knowing you guys just did THAT," Kimi says making Ollie and I both chuckle softly.
"I don't think Ollie needs to be near Dino right now," I joke softly making Ollie shove me laughing along with me.
"We'll pass but tomorrow after the Grand Prix wanna grab dinner together?" Ollie says making plans with Kimi and Dino for us.
When Kimi leaves the room I can hear him announce loudly exactly what Ollie and I were doing. I can only hope it was just Dino in the hallway.
"I'm sorry if I overreacted," Ollie says softly placing a kiss on my forehead.
"It's okay, especially if you fuck me like that when it happens," I tease making Ollie grow red.
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Text
In which the Kaminoans provide a miseducated version of what and who the Jedi are, and the clones realize that at their core, the Jedi are religious monks.
Cultural misunderstands are bound to ensue due to this.
(based of the scene where Obi-wan and Anakin bow to Echo and Fives after they join the 501st)
(original ao3 link)
The first time Obi-Wan bows to Cody, he does so low and Infront of the men. All of the men. It is not a simple incline of his head. It is a slow, low dip.
Ancient practiced movements, just as Qui-Gon had taught him.
They had had saved his life. Again And he is truly grateful. He is still unused to a war like this. His very essence as a Jedi protests his involvement in it.
But he moves only by the will of the Force, and it has brought him to such a moment like this.
Before he completes his gratitude, he is stunned by a collective gasp amongst the men and an arm on his shoulder. The Force tells him it is one of the younger men.
There's a sharp reprimand from Cody, and the arm is off, though the Force is still disturbed
(The touch had not bothered Obi-Wan, in between droids and separatist leaders, it has been the kindest touch he's had all week.
It doesn't bother him, the touch of the clones. He enjoys their presence. Though he can feel the fear palatable through the Force. He hopes that one day they'll be less terrified of him. That they will know him for the human he is. Force knows the damage the Kaminoans have done to the reputation of the Jedi Order.)
Cody steps up as Obi-Wan rises--clearly the action disturbed the peace.
"Sir, I-"
"Clearly I have done something to offend you." He straightens himself, "I apologize."
Cody looks scandalized. This is not going well.
He hesitates. His Commander is still a Labyrinth. He looks at the face of Jango Fett everyday, though he sees none of the darkness clouded in those eyes. With Cody, it's almost fear.
"Sir, there is no need to apologize to us. it's just..."
"it's a sign that we've done wrong and have to ask for forgiveness, usually done by subordinates--cadets to the Kaminoans or the bounty hunters that trained us. When you did that, well...it looked like you thought you did something wrong, that maybe you were asking for forgiveness or was ashamed," another clone (Boil, Obi-Wan reminds himself, the "shiny" who touched him) supplies with some distaste, "doesn't mean the same for you sir?"
Obi-Wan could confuse them, because technically Jedi do bow for forgiveness too. But not in shame, never. He decides to keep it beginner level friendly today.
"I am expressing gratitude. You saved my life," Obi-Wan responds as if it is the most obvious thing, "Though If I have done anything wrong, it has simply been confusing you all. I will not bow if it makes you all comfortable."
His culture is important to him. It his his blood and his soul, but these men are not here with him of their own accord. These men are making sacrifices just by being alive, Obi-Wan could stand to be more like them. Though his heart pulls at the thought of abandoning something so natural to him.
"No sir, that is not necessary," Cody seems to relax in front of him. His anxiety has dissolved into gentle waves in the Force, and instead Obi-Wan senses a small bit of curiosity.
It reverberates through the company.
"Should we..."
"Oh Force no, if bowing has been negative to you please do not do it on my account. And I will alter it," he makes an example, inclining his head just slightly and putting a hand to his chest, praying he doesn't offend, "I am grateful to you all, and I endeavor to show it."
"Only what you're comfortable with, your culture is sacred to you, I know this," he adds, "and if you never tell me anything, I will be okay with that."
"Can you...can we learn more. The kaminoans didn't tell us you did that, they didn't tell us you were...priest--"
"Monks," Obi-wan corrects and smiles at the clone who asked, Waxer the Force tells him, "And I will till you all you want to know about the Jedi, if you feel comfortable telling me about who you are."
There's reluctance in the Force. They may not be Mandalorians, but they carry the secrecy of their beliefs with them. He doesn't blame them. They have so little that belongs to them, the clones. Why give what scarcity they own away to the man who they were handed to on a silver platter.
The Force radiates skepticism, but also trust.
Good, the gap is slowly bridging.
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milliesfishes · 3 days
Note
she breaks something by accident in front of him and she’s trying to hold back tears as she apologizes profusely and tries to clean it up fast and his heart just hurts in his chest because he knows her head is telling her over and over in that moment that he’ll leave her for something so small
and of course before he can stop her she’s got her hand cut on broken glass and bloody and she’s just crying at that point and apologizing even more because she feels like a burden for getting hurt
oh I fear this one hit too close to home (edit: this did not start as this, but it became very long)
⋆౨ৎ𝓫𝓲𝓵𝓵𝔂 𝔀𝓱𝓮𝓷 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓫𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰⋆౨ৎ 𝓯𝓮𝓶 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻 𝔁 𝓫𝓲𝓵𝓵𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓴𝓲𝓭
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The sound of the glass hitting the ground hit your ears before you realized what had happened. There was a brief moment in time when you were frozen, eyes wide as the centers of daisies. It had been completely innocent- you'd been laughing at something he said, sweeping your hand out in an exaggerated motion. And now the moment was broken, all innocence sapped out of the room.
Apologies flooded from your lips, and you dropped to your knees in an instant, reaching for the scattered shards. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry-"
Across from you, Billy was standing up, reaching for you. "Baby-"
Your breath hitched on your tenth apology, and you took in a staggered breath, a few of the larger pieces of the glass gathered in a tiny pile in front of you. Heart pounding, the thoughts running through your mind were frantic, awfully firm and unyielding. He's gonna leave you. You made a mistake. He's gonna hate you now, you don't deserve him.
Stepping around the glass, Billy tried to get to you, and you kept your head down, hair falling around the sides of your face like a curtain. "I'll fix it...I'm sorry, I'll fix it..."
Billy knelt beside you, his hand on your arm, trying to meet your eyes. "Sweetheart, it's-"
A sharp gasp interrupted him. You'd reached for a piece of glass without thinking and now your hand was cut in the space below your thumb. Humiliation flooded your system, and your cheeks burned as hot tears began to cascade down your face, stinging like salt in a wound. Nononononono you made a mistake, you made a mistake-
Breaths uneven, you fell back against the leg of your chair, trying to steady yourself, holding your hand to your chest. Blood was dripping down your finger, and you drew your knees up, looking away from Billy and shutting your eyes as if that would make him disappear. You wanted to redo this moment, to fix everything you'd done.
His hand was gentle on your knee, and you opened your eyes at his touch. Billy's other palm was extended, and he murmured, "Lemme see."
Against your will, you gave him your hand, and he reached up to his neck, unraveling the bandana he wore there. The cloth was pressed to your hand soon after, and he held it there for a moment until he was satisfied, tying it across your knuckles.
The entire time he was tending to you, a bucket of guilt was poured over your head like rain in the springtime. You'd done a bad thing, you'd ruined your evening and here he was, being so kind and sweet just like always. A fresh wave of tears fell down your cheeks in rivers, and his eyes softened.
Billy slid his arm around your waist, tugging at you. "C'mere...c'mere, sweet girl. It's okay. I promise."
You moved into him like he was your gravity. Billy held you tight to his chest, leaning his cheek to the top of your head. "Shh, it's okay. It was just an accident, baby."
"I'm sorry-" you choked, voice strung with a high pitch. You were clinging to him like he was a lifeline, his scent and being engulfing you the way it always did. And the fact that he didn't even seem mad made you feel worse.
"You didn't do anything wrong. It's okay," he whispered, kissing the top of your head and letting his lips linger there. "Oh my love...my baby..." Billy shifted you onto his lap, away from the precarious shards of glass still scattered and hidden across the floor.
It was quiet for a minute, except for the sounds of Billy adjusting your legs across his so not a single portion of your skin was touching the ground. He held you for a stretch of time that you didn't bother to count.
When it had been a moment, he began to murmur little questions against your head, and you responded with a nod or a shake.
"Are you tired?" Shake.
He rubbed his thumb soothingly up and down your arm. "D'you wanna get in bed? Just to get cozy?" Nod.
Billy nudged his lips against your hairline, hugging you tight to him. You felt a flood of love and warmth in your chest, replacing the tautness of anxiety that occupied the space before. He isn't mad.
"You know I love you?" he whispered, the tenderness of his tone nearly bringing you to tears again. Billy tilted your chin up, searching your eyes.
In his face you saw something heavenly reflected back. Nobody would call your Billy pure, but his love was. It existed outside whatever wrongs he'd committed, whatever sins stood in need of repentance. The boundless emotion you saw in his eyes was too big to ever be set off course by something like an accident.
He used a hand to smooth your hair, tuck it behind your ear. "I love you so much." Cupping your cheek in his big palm, his lips twitched up a little sadly when you leaned into it. "Now you know?"
You reached up for his wrist, squeezing it. Nod.
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balkanradfem · 2 days
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I have an update, for people invested in the story of me vs the attractive woman who moved into the building, who I cannot figure out. I still don't know if she's interested in women, if she likes me at all. She has short hair and is 9 years older than me which makes her irresistible.
So my main point of confusion was that she always reacted extremely friendly to me, even as far as yelling my name excitedly and waving when she sees me, but then when we talk she talks to me as if I'm a small child maybe, using words you'd use with children. So I've been on the fence on whether she just sees me as a small lost child who needs attention, or if I could potentially ask her out. I've met her a few times more, only briefly, but one of those times she called my name in an iteration that means small, she added a suffix that you would add to a child's name. (She added '-ica' to my name, for croatian speakers).
And this was too much for me, I had to draw a line at the small iteration of my name, I do not enjoy being viewed as a child, and will not have a crush on someone who makes me feel like I'm not a grownup >: (. So I decided, this is a lost cause romantically, I'm no longer into her, she obviously sees me as a child. It's fair, I also see anyone 9 years younger than me as a tiny baby who I can only be friends with, but I do think that's very cool of lesbians, that we're the exact opposite of pedophiles.
So I calmed down about her, but then I thought, okay, now that I'm not having my brain scrambled by the yearning, I could actually try to ask her to come over so I can meet her and see if we could be friends. She still acted very sweet towards me, one day I opened the door of the building, she was standing right outside, and jumped when I said 'Hi!' loudly. I apologized for scaring her, and she said 'It's okay, I just wasn't even hoping for you.'
How am I supposed to deal with that. That is adorable. I had to go immediately that day, but I decided to calm down, and wait for an opportunity to see if I can get to know her better.
The opportunity came today! I stumbled on her while biking outside, got her attention, and then told her 'Hey, you seem like an interesting person, and I'd love to sit down and talk to you sometimes, I want to know more about you. Could I invite you over for tea?'. And she said, 'Okay, give me your number!', and then she realized, she didn't take her phone with, because it was raining. I grabbed my phone to take her number, but my battery was 1% and the screen was too dark to see. We were both standing there without functional phones, laughing at ourselves. Then she grabbed a pen from her bag, asked me to give her my hand, and wrote her number on it. I've never had a woman write down her number on my hand! It was a great experience. She stopped to ask if it was hurting me, and I was smiling and giggling because I was thrilled, and told her to keep writing. Her handwriting is very neat! I promised to quick-call her as soon as I got home, so her phone will have my number as well.
So now I have her number on my hand, and I did give her a very short ring, so she has my number too. Now I'm nervous! I cleaned up the place because I don't know when she's going to come over, and I'm plagued by the anxiety that I won't be able to offer her a sweet treat because I never make any. I gave her an open invitation so she can just randomly decide to come and I will seem like a person with no food in my kitchen because I only make food when I'm hungry and then eat it immediately. Do you think pan-fried apples is an acceptable treat for a guest? I'm being so normal about this.
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hadesisqueer · 3 days
Text
When I travelled abroad with my older cousin and her daughter (my second cousin who's around my age) a few years ago we were at a bar after this really hot guy hit on my older cousin and we had to stay at the bar as my older cousin shamelessly flirted and then made out with a guy who didn't even understand her well (and I often had to translate because I was the only bilingual one) and my second cousin and I were walking around and my second cousin got lost for a second so she could talk to her mom for a moment and then someone dropped half their drink on me and I was about to rip their head off until I saw it was a really hot girl about slightly older than me and she apologized to me in English and I said it's fine dw and we started talking and she told me her name and that she was from the US and I told her my name and where I was from and she was nice and after a few minutes I realized she was hitting on me and she was offering to buy me a drink and but then my cousins showed up telling me we were leaving already and I wanted to murder them bitch you were making out with a guy two minutes ago why can't you make out a for a bit longer so I can make out with this girl-- yeah to this day I still haven't forgiven them
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lemoncrushh · 2 days
Text
Show Me Your Texts, or It's Over
Summary: Harry finds out you've been in contact with your ex and gives you an ultimatum.
Warnings: angst, maybe a little gaslighting
Word Count: 1889
A/N: From my 2016 collection. This was based on a prompt selected by a reader. Very angsty. You won't like Harry in this, and maybe not y/n either. I almost didn't repost it, but please don't take it too seriously.
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You hurried outside to your car, the summer heat threatening to burn you through your black shirt. You felt the vibration of your phone in your hand, alerting you of yet another text from Harry. He'd been texting you all morning and throughout your lunch break. It had started off as a harmless conversation of missing each other when he'd reminded you what time his flight arrived. You'd been apart for over a week, resolving to short late night phone chatter until one of you fell asleep, or the occasional text that left you cold and flat. Needless to say, you were dying to see him.
As the morning progressed, however, so did the texts. His flight was delayed due to weather. He wasn't sure if he'd make it in time to go home and change, so he'd asked to meet you at the dinner party. You argued back and forth, insisting that you were fine with being a bit late if it meant you could go together.
You knew without a doubt that this text that had just arrived was him telling you otherwise, but you were already running late and needed to get back to work. You'd been excited for and anticipating his return, but now you were just frustrated and perturbed.
Tossing your purse and your phone in the passenger seat, you drove back to work. It wasn't until you were settled back in your desk, running your hands through your hair with a sigh, that you decided to examine his newest text. You were surprised, however, when you noticed the name. It wasn't from Harry. It was from your ex-boyfriend, John.
Biting your lip, you swiped the screen to read the text.
Working hard, or hardly working?
You chuckled, texting him back quickly.
Neither. Just got back from lunch.
Damn, I was hoping to persuade you to meet me for a bite.
You grinned at your screen. John had texted you out of the blue two weeks ago. At first you were apprehensive about talking to him again. He'd been the one to break off the relationship, claiming he wasn't ready to commit. You'd taken that to mean he wanted to be free to screw around, so you'd given him the boot. Although you held your head up high, you'd been hurt, your self-esteem lacking. That is, until you'd met Harry. Harry had been the solace that you'd needed, lifting you up repeatedly by his words as well as his actions.
When John came clean with you in his texts, apologizing and admitting that you deserved much more than he had given, you'd decided to bury the hatchet. There was no point in being bitter about it, and you forgave him, not so much for his sake, but for yours.
One thing you hadn't done, though, was tell Harry about it. It wasn't really that you were trying to hide it from him, but you didn't want it to become a big deal. Harry knew how John had treated you. You'd told him repeatedly, and a couple of times had cried in his arms over it. So telling him this same ex that had made you cry was now texting you like an old friend...probably wouldn't be a good idea.
Sorry, you texted John back. Raincheck?
Better yet, how about you meet me for drinks later?
You gritted your teeth, not sure how to answer. Asking for a raincheck on lunch was one thing. Lunch you could do. Probably. But drinks after work? Besides, you needed to run straight home after work to get ready for this dinner party with Harry.
As though he knew you were thinking of him, Harry's name popped up with a new text.
Flight's been delayed longer. I should be home about 7.
Just as you were about to reply, another text alert from John popped up.
How does Margo's sound?
You swallowed hard, trying to decide who to answer first. Quickly, you typed out a message for John.
Sorry, I can't tonight. Harry's coming home.
As soon as you hit send, your eyes about popped out of your head. You'd sent it to the wrong person! Shit!
You saw the three little dots pop up, indicating Harry was typing.
What??
Calming yourself down, you decided to play it cool. It was an accident. He had no idea who the message was for.
Haha sorry baby. I was talking to a friend. Didn't mean to send that to you. I'll see you at 7.
Ok
Making sure you had John's text open then, you politely declined, sending him the text you'd originally intended to.
Oh ok then, John sent back. Maybe some other time. Have fun!
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"[Y/N]!" you heard Harry call from the front of the house.
"You're home!" you squealed from the bedroom.
You'd hoped to meet him at the door, greeting him with lavish kisses, but right then you were in an awkward position on the bed, trying to buckle your high-heeled strappy sandal.
"Hi, beautiful," he said in a low tone.
You looked up to see him standing in the doorway. Temporarily dismissing your buckle, you stood to meet him halfway, wrapping your arms around him.
"Mmm, I've missed you," you murmured against his chest.
"I missed you, too," he echoed, "and you look gorgeous."
"What, this old thing?" you playfully scoffed, stepping back to allow him to view your ensemble completely.
A sexy grin spread across his face while he set his suitcase against the wall.
"I'll hurry and get ready. Wish I had time for a shower."
"Go ahead," you insisted. "I don't mind waiting."
"No, love, we're already late. I'll just change."
You sat back down on your bed, grabbing your phone while Harry undressed. You'd gotten a couple of texts from John earlier. When you'd told him you were getting ready for a dinner party, he'd asked you to send a picture. You thought it was a little odd at first, but so far he hadn't said anything that made you feel uneasy. You'd sort of slipped into this comfortable friend zone unexpectedly. So a few minutes before Harry had arrived, you'd sent John a selfie in your dress. He had yet to reply.
Tossing your phone on the bed, you stood and walked to the vanity to put your earrings on. As you were adjusting the second one, Harry passed by the bed.
"Who's John?" he inquired, shoving his arms into a clean shirt.
"What?" you turned to look at him. You noticed then he was inspecting your phone.
"You just got a text from a John," he added.
Oh no.
"'Wow, you look amazing!'" Harry quoted, reading the text that John had apparently sent. "'Sexy as hell!'"
Your entire body trembled as he lifted his head to glare at you.
"Who the fuck is John?" he repeated, his voice rising.
"Um..." you sucked in your lips, wringing your hands.
"Not your bloody ex boyfriend!" Harry nearly shouted, his eyes narrowed.
"Baby-" you started, but Harry interrupted you.
"You're talking to him again? After what he did to you?"
"Harry," you swallowed, stepping towards him. "Let me explain."
His face showed no sign of willingness to listen to any explanation though he remained rooted in his spot.
"He's been texting me a little," you admitted.
"A little?" Harry raised a brow. "For how long?"
"A couple weeks."
"A couple weeks?! Were you gonna tell me?"
You looked down at your hands, wishing you had something in them to hold.
"I thought you'd be mad," you said meekly.
"Well you were right about that!" Harry turned away from you, running a hand through his hair. "Fuck!"
"Harry, I'm sorry," you muttered sincerely. "But I swear, it's harmless."
He swung around, his eyes shooting daggers at you. "Harmless, huh?"
"Yes. He wanted to apologize for everything. I told him I appreciated and accepted his apology, and we just got to talking about what we've been up to, you know, like catching up. I told him about you and-"
"You've told him about me," Harry interrupted.
"Yes! He knows all about you. He knows you were coming home today and we were going to a party."
"Is that..." he paused, "is that who you were texting earlier today? When you sent me the wrong text?"
The look on his face told you he did not find it funny in the least, regardless of your trying to play it off like you had. You opened your mouth to retort, but decided it wasn't worth it.
"Yes," you sighed.
"Shit," Harry dropped his shoulders. He blinked slowly before reaching for your phone.
"Let me see the texts," he demanded.
"What?" you asked incredulously.
"The texts from him. Your conversations."
Anger building in your chest, you grabbed your phone out of his hand.
"No!" you glared at him. "That's ludicrous!"
"Why? Because you have something to hide?"
"No, I-"
"Then show them to me, [Y/N]."
You stood silent for a moment before shaking your head slowly.
"Show me your texts, or it's over," said Harry.
"You can't be serious," you contended, your voice just a whisper.
"Dead serious."
"You..." you began, but quickly surrendered, handing him the phone. "Fine."
You sunk down onto the bed while Harry scrolled through your text messages from John. You knew there was nothing wrong with them. It was the principal. Harry didn't trust you, and that angered and disappointed you.
You focused on Harry's belt buckle while he stood before you. You felt like a child. You didn't appreciate it. You loved Harry and you would never to anything to sabotage your relationship. A tear dropped in your lap, wetting your dress before you even realized you'd been crying. Sniffling, you stood up again to reach for a tissue on the vanity.
"[Y/N]," you finally heard Harry mutter. He cleared his throat. "Baby, I'm sorry."
You turned and looked at him, your eyebrows raised. He lowered the phone, dropping it on the bed. Then he stepped closer to you, reaching for your hands.
"I'm so sorry," he declared again. You noticed a glint of a tear in his right eye.
"I was telling the truth," you said.
"I know," Harry bit his lip, the side of his mouth turning up. "You mentioned me a lot."
"I did," you nodded.
"And you said you're madly in love with me."
"I did."
"And that you're happy. For the first time in your life."
You blinked. "Yes, I did."
"God," Harry ran a hand through his hair again. "I was a jealous prat."
You giggled softly before placing your hands on his chest. "What on earth do you have to be jealous about?"
Harry grinned. "I mean...I still kinda think he's trying something. But I like how you sidestep him every time."
"Because I don't want him, Harry," you conveyed. "I want you. Only you."
You gazed into his eyes until he slipped his hands under your ears and lowered his mouth to capture yours.
"I really missed you," he murmured. "Maybe too much. It's made me do something I never thought I'd do."
"I'm yours, baby," you promised. "You don't have to worry about a thing."
You slid your hands down his torso.
"Except maybe about being late for dinner."
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MASTERLIST | KO-FI | FEEDBACK
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vampiresbloodx · 2 days
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Stardew valley au:
Farmer!reader moving to Pelican Town and taking over their grandfather's farm will definitely be a lot of sweaty, sleepless nights and drowning on coffee to make sure everything looks just as perfect as you saw in those photos of what the farm used to be.
That's when you meet everybody in town (slowly at least) and your very friendly neighbors, who you think are way too friendly or you're just socially anxious and not used to small town kindness. You cross paths with Natasha Romanoff and her roommate Wanda Maximoff, they live in the same house together, just not in the same room she explains but everyone else calls them roommates.
Wanda wasn't there when you introduced yourself shyly to Natasha, she was supposedly out doing whatever she was doing (to quote Natasha's exact words) the mayor has expressed how fond of them he was, even first mentioned it to you the day you had arrived in hopes they'd be delighted by your presence.
It seems as though getting to know Wanda was gonna be a hard one...
But you weren't the one to hide away from a task.
Natasha herself didn't look all too interested in the new farmer in town, she kept on muttering about meeting up with a friend, Carol you think her name was, there was a Val to? You weren't sure. Maybe you should pay attention more often if the girls you didn't meet weren't so damn gorgeous you couldn't stop staring.
Weeks passed, soon it was your first month staying in this town. And you had gotten your very own cat!.
It was very unexpected the morning you heard your door knocking and you opened it, revealing Natasha's roommate, Wanda, who was more shy than you had imagined, you thought she'd be more confident, like her roommate in a way, guess she was kind of like you, introverted, quiet. You couldn't help but stare at her more than you should as you took in all of her, the skirt she was wearing, the long boots, the leather jacket and loose shirt, it almost made you feel like a damn creep staring especially when her cleavage was almost poking out.
Despite how intimidating she looks, she was actually really nice to you, she apologized for not being there when you first came, she was busy with her online classes to which you had asked about her interests and was intrigued about it, she seemed to really like that.
Was every girl in this countryside small town this damn beautiful? You thought, trying to keep it together as you probably looked like a flustered mess in front of this woman.
"um, where was I..." Wanda chuckled, looking around the front of your farm house, you smiled, letting her take her time to gather her words. "Nat and I like to go to the saloon on Fridays, she does, I mostly enjoy spending time in my room, but if you wanted to join us, you can."
You couldn't help but notice how red her cheeks got when she was trying to ask that question. God it was adorable.
You nodded.
She looked surprised.
"you'll be there? Oh, cool! I'll let her know and all, I'm happy you came here, dunno why, there's not much happening- okay maybe there is and I just don't go out as much but that's just me okay I'll leave you be I'm starting to ramble now."
You were beginning to love this town a little more.
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hey-hey-j · 4 hours
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posting some of my unfinished comics just to get them out of my mind and because I still think the ideas have merit. Picked at this one for a while before deciding I just wasn't vibing with the compositions even though I really liked the emotional pacing, lol
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I imagined this scenario taking place a good while after Band Together, when JD has mostly smoothed things over with the bros but has yet to actually say the words "I'm sorry" because dealing with guilt is hard and he hates the thought that those feelings will never really go away no matter how much he apologizes or how hard he tries to fix things and yadda yadda that's a rant for another post
anyway here's the script I was working off of because I still feel bad I didn't make it to that last bit of dialogue
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nerdygaymormon · 2 days
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Artwork at the 2024 Gather Conference
The corridor at the conference had many art pieces on display. Here's the ones I liked the most. (I apologize to the artists of the pieces I didn't get their name nor a description of their work)
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A Seat at the Table by Rachel Jensen
Rachel says that a gay man she follows shared a quote from his journal, “I feel like everyone says there is a seat at the table for God’s gay children, but nobody actually knows where it is. So instead I just stand here, hoping that seat appears before my legs give out.” That quote inspired this art. She wanted to show a table where LGBTQ people already have a seat and are no longer relegated to the margins. Each person in this painting is wearing colors representing a different pride flag.
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Off To the Side by Steven Handley
Steven says that we queer folks often fall through the cracks or use the cracks to get through. Looking at this piece of art straight on, you miss the rainbow. The colors, like queer folks, are there, you just have to be open to seeing them.
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Always by Sarah McDonald
Sarah says explains that holding space inevitably calls for change. For an expansion. For growing outwards, upwards, and inwards. Like a rainbow, change makes space for every color. Always.
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Confronting Bisexual Erasure by Ashley Whitlock
Ashley is married to a man and could easily live a straight passing life. However, it's important to be her whole self. Holding back part of her was not helping her feel her authentic self. There are a LOT of bisexual people in the church who probably feel they are too straight for the gays and a bit too gay for the straights. She wants people to feel seen and to recognize that bisexuality is valid.
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reallychaoticwoo · 1 day
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Can i get an ateez Reaction to you having period stain at send off?
⛓️This is gonna be fun lol! Please remember in this household we are most definitely delusional so these will absolutely not be the most realistic scenarios⛓️
✨️ Ateez reacting to y/n having a period stain at send-off✨️
❤️Pairing: Ateez (individually) x reader
⚠️Warnings: cussing, fluff, some suggestiveness 🤍👀 Pretty tame, I think? Lmk if I missed anything, tho!
‼️This is purely for entertainment purposes and does not represent the idols in any way‼️
🖤Hope you enjoy!🖤
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Hongjoong:
Noticing it he'd be quick to have his manager pull you aside as discrete as possible. Having a staff member get you a jacket or hoodie to help you cover up the red stain. He'd offer to take you to his hotel room and give you a change of clothes and new sanitary items letting you stay with him until your original outfit could be cleaned.
Seonghwa:
His need to be a caregiver takes over instantly. He'd discreetly hand you a photocard or note telling you which staff member to go to. You'd be given new sanitary products and taken to a private room until send off was over. He'd take you back to his hotel room, get you a change of clothes, and offer pain meds, cuddles, food, or to help with cramps (iykyk) whatever you needed he would be more than willing to provide.
Yunho:
Yunho would somehow make a big deal about it without making a big deal about it. Taking off his jersey and signing it before handing it to you with a soft whisper in your ear telling you to use it to hide the stain and meet him after send-off. Naturally that would cause everyone to look at you but at least you had a shield now. After everyone left he'd take you to go buy some new pants and out to grab a bite since you two were friends now anyways.
Yeosang:
The chaotic sweetie he is, would probably notice it a little too hard making you question why he kept looking at you the way was. Feeling guilty for basically staring at your vag he'd nervously lean closer and inform you of your definitely noticeable stain. Your wide eyed reaction would have him offering to let you hide out in one of the back rooms for the time being until he could meet you to help you find a solution. The solution? We'll you were now in his bed napping naked while he had someone run and grab you new clothes. Don't worry you definitely ended up getting some pain relief when you woke up 😉
San:
It's almost instant that he's asking you if he can "help you out with that" a smug but sweet smile on his face as he glances down and back up. The panicked reaction to his not so subtle words causing him to chuckle before handing you his hotel room info. Once he arrived you'd be well taken care of, fed a nice warm meal, and be put in his clothing afterwards. If you didn't already know, he's adopted you now, somewhat like a stray kitten. So you're his 🤷🏻‍♀️
Mingi:
As much as I love this man, my first instinct is that he'd try to be discrete and end up letting the entire room know somehow. His voice being way to loud and him being way too hype after the concert. Feeling guilty for informing an entire room of people of your situation he'd then offer to take you out to buy some new clothes. Shopping with him somehow turned into an arcade date and then ice cream. He thinks you're dating now? You're 100% cool with that.
Wooyoung:
As soon as he spots it he's running to either San or Hwa to get you help in the hands of a more mature adult. Meeting up with you after send off to apologize for not getting to address you properly amidst his childish panic. Trying to make light of the situation he'd probably ask if you had a "blood kink or something" to which you'd definitely be hitting his arm huffing at, earning yourself one of his famous Cheshire grins. He's gonna go ask San if they can keep you now. San would then ask Seonghwa to ask Hongjoong. To which the captain would reluctantly agree due to the request of his favorite member.
Jongho:
For the first time in send off history this man stripped off a layer of his clothing. He'd seen the stain a few people down so when he made it to you his hoodie was already dropped over his arm and ready to be given to his manager who would pull you to the back of the room and hand it to you. Stopping you on your way out he'd hand you a pair of sweats from his bag he kept in the dressing room and ask if you'd like to change here and go grab a coffee.
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