#my mother shouted at me earlier and i am thinking about it to hard

[queenshelby]

Daughter Dearest (Part Ten)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy (47) x Step! Daughter (21)

Warning: Infidelity, Smut, Dysfunctional Family

Tag List will be updated soon! Please comment and engage!

"You need to get out of my room," you told him in a packed state and Cillian nodded before he quickly untangled himself from you and started to get dressed hastily. His face was flushed with a mix of shame and worry as he tried to pull his clothes on as quickly as possible.

"Quick, put something on!" Cillian whispered frantically as you, throwing your shirt at you that was lying around on the floor.  

You moved quickly, pulling the shirt over your head as you slipped out of bed and hurriedly pulled on your underwear and pants up too. 

Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest, and you swallowed hard, feeling a wave of anxiety wash over you as you heard your mother's voice.

"Cillian?" she called out , her voice was calm, but something in her tone sent a chill down your spine.

"Fuck," Cillian hissed, his face panicked, knowing that she might see him coming out of your room.

"Can you come down and help me with the bags?" she then called out, from the bottom of the staircase, which led directly to the bedrooms.

Cillian's entire body stiffened. He didn't know what to say or do, but the urgency in your eyes prompted him to make a move.

"I'll be right there, Marion!" Cillian shouted back, trying to keep his voice steady and calm before he nervously exited your room and, as soon as he stepped out of the door, he saw your mother, having walked half-way up the stairs already. 

Her gaze was laser-focused on Cillian, a hint of suspicion in her eyes. "What were you doing in Y/N's room?" she asked, but not suspecting anything inappropriate, even despite Cillian's disheveled appearance/ 

Cillian swallowed hard, trying to think up a plausible excuse on the spot. "Oh, I was just... checking on Y/N," he said, forcing a smile. "She seemed a bit down earlier, so I wanted to make sure she was okay."

Marion raised an eyebrow, not entirely convinced by his explanation.

"Well, I am about to have a word with her," your mother responded almost angrily but Cillian blocked her way up. 

"Let's get your bags in first," he suggested as he tried to divert your mother's attention for as long as he could.  "Despite, I think she needs a little alone time this morning as she had a fight with one of her friends,"  he added, searching for any excuse that could buy him a few minutes.

Your mother looked unconvinced but eventually relented. "Fine," she then said just before Cillian followed her to the car.

"Why are you even home already? And where is Sadie?" Cillian queried Marion  as he was loading bags into the house, still rattled by the encounter with you.

"Sadie is with Cliona, who is taking her to the park so that I can sort out the bloody drama Y/N has caused again,"  your mother said with a frustrated sigh.

Cillian froze, feeling a sinking feeling in his stomach at the mention of your name and the implied drama. "What do you mean by 'the bloody drama Y/N has caused again'?" Cillian asked cautiously.

"Oh god Cillian, did you not read the headlines?" she  asked, her voice laced with disdain. "The fact that she broke her house arrest and had you pick her up from the police station is all over social media," she went on before pulling out her phone and showing it to him.

"Well, thank god I don't do Facebook," Cillian chuckled, brushing off  the news to lighten the mood. 

Marion sighed, shaking her head in disbelief. "Cillian, this is serious.  Y/N is constantly causing trouble, and I can't believe that you didn't even call me when this happened. I mean, why didn't you?" she  asked, looking at Cillian with confusion. "I would have expected you to tell me if my daughter got arrested."

Cillian sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "I didn't want to worry you while you were enjoying some time away," he said, honestly. "Besides, Y/N asked me not to tell you. She was afraid of your reaction. Clearly rightfully so."

Marion scoffed. "Afraid of my reaction? She should be more afraid of the consequences of her actions," your mother spat, causing Cillian to become a little more protective.

"She didn't smuggle the drugs, Marion. She found out who framed her and went after her," Cillian began to explain. "And yes, it was a hotheaded decision that got her into trouble again, but her solicitor is sorting it now, so you can relax, alright? Just give her a break,"  Cillian insisted before taking the last bag from your mother's car.

Your mother, Marion, simply sighed in frustration. "Hot-headed is an understatement, Cillian. You know as well as I do that her reckless actions might not only ruin her own reputation but also affect yours and your career," she pointed out, but Cillian only shrugged it off.

"My reputation is fine Marion," he replied, unbothered. "Besides, Y/N's actions speak to her character, and I'd rather have a stepdaughter with courage and a backbone than one who's silent and obedient."

"You are too lenient," she said before calling out for you.

"Y/N, can you join us in the kitchen, please?" she called out.

All characters are over 18.

You sighed, knowing that you were in for another lecture about your choices and how they affected your family's reputation. You walked into the large, open-concept kitchen, where your mother sat at the kitchen island, looking expectedly while Cillian was standing by the sink, trying to avoid your gaze. 

"We really need to discuss your careless actions, Y/N. They are unacceptable and affect us all," your mother began with a pointed look in your direction as you stepped in front of her, wondering whether she could smell her husband's scent on you. 

"And what makes you think you have the right to lecture me about the decisions I make?" you shot back, looking at her, wanting to tell her what you just did, but of course, you wouldn't have. Revenge was not what your interactions with Cillian were about. 

"I have every right to lecture you," Marion countered coolly, still not missing a beat. "I am your mother and you are staying in my home, so you listen to me," she  asserted, reflecting an air of authority.

Cillian stepped closer, moving to stand protectively by your side, his presence a small sense of comfort in this awkward situation.

"Marion, let's just take a step back and take a deep breath," Cillian advised, his tone gentle, but firm. "Being angry won't solve anything."

Your mother huffed in response, before she closed her eyes and inhaled a deep breath. "Are you taking sides now?" she then asked him accusingly, turning her steely gaze towards Cillian.

"I am just trying to be reasonable," he replied, maintaining his neutral stance. "Because I think that you should actually hear Y/N out," he went on, looking at you, then on to your mother, expecting her to listen to you.

You looked surprised at Cillian's support, but it brought a small sense of relief which, unfortunately, for you, was short lived.

"What is this on your neck?"  your mother asked abruptly in a stern, disciplinary tone, piercing the tense silence in the room.

Her sudden query was followed by her hand extending forward, hovering over the side of your neck where Cillian must have left a red mark during your heated sessions. 

"It's nothing," you muttered quickly, flinching at her sudden touch.

"Alright, well, anyway...," she continued, lowering her hand back to her side, although her eyes remained fixed on the spot. "I am not going to tolerate another breach of your house arrest, and I expect you to behave yourself during your time here," she said with a sternness that was even rare for her.

"Yes, mother," you sighed deeply with a slight roll of your eyes, trying to downplay the situation.

"Don't be smart and go and have a shower. You look like a mess,"  your mother said, glancing over you one more time before turning to leave the room.

You couldn't help but feel a sense of relief wash over you once your mother had left the room, her judgemental gaze no longer lingering on you.

"I need to get out of here," you muttered under your breath, shifting nervously on your feet while Cillian came closer.

"And hopefully you can soon, even though I will miss your company," he said quietly  , placing a hand on your shoulder. The warmth of his touch burned through the fabric of your shirt and sent a shiver down your spine.

"I will miss you, too," you confessed as you finally looked at him, meeting his eyes. There was a distance between them both, yet a connection electrified the air, like a magnetic force drawing them together. "Last night was nice and so was this morning," you whispered  to him, almost inaudibly.

"It was," Cillian agreed, his voice low and soft. "More than nice, in fact. But what happened between us cannot happen again and, as we had agreed, let's not mention it again," Cillian murmured. Despite his composure, his eyes showed vulnerability and depth-filled with desire. 

You felt a pang of regret, knowing that your-selfish desires had led you to an unexpected path. The connection between you two was an unstoppable, powerful force but you knew that acting on it could only end in tragedy, not just for you and Cillian, but also for your family. 

"Agreed," you thus said before asking him for one more favor. "But I just have to ask you for one more thing," you hesitated before catching a lock of loose hair that had fallen across your shoulder and twirling it between your fingers nervously.

"What is it?" Cillian asked, his eyes on you, waiting patiently for your answer.

"I...I need you to go to the pharmacy for me,"  you requested Cillian, hesitation in your voice.

Cillian raised his eyebrows but quickly schooled his features. "Are you feeling okay? I mean, after, you know...," he asked, a hint of concern etched on his forehead.

You hesitated for a fraction of a moment, gathering your thoughts. "I'm fine, it's just... I need the morning after pill," you finally managed to squeak out.

Speaking the words aloud made you cringe but you knew this was the responsible thing to do and, of course, Cillian agreed.

"Of course, I'll go," he replied casually, as if you had asked him to get ice cream instead.

"Thank you," you murmured gratefully, releasing your breath in a soft exhale as Cillian stepped closer to you, brushing a gentle strand of loose hair off your shoulder.

"Do you need anything else while I am there?"  Cillian asked, his voice gentle and caring but you shook your head.

"No, that is all," you replied quickly, forcing a smile.

Cillian placed a hand on your lower back, his fingers gently brushing against your skin, leaving a tingling sensation in its wake. The gesture was so small yet so intimate that it made you feel both exhilarated and conflicted.

"Okay then, I'll be back in a few," Cillian said softly, his eyes never leaving yours as he slowly stepped away from you.

The way he looked at you, filled you with such a deep longing, it was almost overwhelming.

"See you soon," you whispered, watching him walk towards the door where he paused and looked back at you, one last time before he left.

Tags:

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[mrscolinbridgerton96]

“I Do Not Love You Any Less” | a POLIN fic

Plot: It is Penelope and Colin’s wedding night.. and it is anything but newlywed bliss. However, it is on this night that they have a long overdue conversation.

~

After longing looking at the man she loves, Penelope watched as Colin grabbed a pillow for the settee and walk out of the room. She felt another piece of her heart break as he closed the door.

She could’ve just left it at that- that any attempt at a conversation could wait until morning.. but she took a deep breath and walked out to talk to him as he took off his boots and threw the pillow and blanket on the settee.

Penelope: “Colin. Please talk to me. I deserve to be heard given the way you are treating me.”

Colin: “The way I am treating you? Penelope, you lied to me and at our wedding breakfast.. you made it very clear that you will never give up Whistledown.”

Penelope: “I understand your anger towards me- in fact, it is justifiable. However, I cannot go another day or night without trying to fix this situation between us. Colin, please.”

Colin: “You want to talk? Very well. Let us talk. Perhaps you can help me understand. Maybe you can attempt to justify all of the damage that you have done with your pen.”

Penelope walks away from the bedroom doors and sits on the settee next to Colin. A part of him wants to move an inch away from her or even to stand up, but he stays where he is.. and even lets Penelope move closer to him. She grabs his hand, takes a deep breath and tells him things she had never thought she’d ever say to him. She opens up- all honesty and completely vulnerable.

Penelope: “I first start writing as Whistledown because I was powerless in my own home and I was forced to debut and enter the marriage mart a year earlier than I was meant to. I intended to give a voice to those felt powerless- the other voiceless. Instead, it became.. something else entirely. When I wrote what I did about Marina, I felt it was the only way I could prevent you from an even deeper form of heartache- I thought I could prevent that.. betrayal. Yes, I knew that Marina was with child when she arrived to the Ton.. but I was forced to remain silent on the issue and was frowned upon for trying to befriend her. I tried so hard to tell you about it. I told you that she was in love with another man.. and you did not believe me. Had Marina not interrupted us, I would have told you everything. I had every intention on telling you, but I feared that you still would have married her anyways- even if it meant being in a one sided relationship; a loveless marriage.. which is something I do not wish on anyone- not even the likes of Cressida Cowper.”

With a blank expression, he looked at her for a split second then looked back down again.

Colin: “And Eloise?”

Penelope: “Eloise came to me explaining how the Queen was convinced that she was Lady Whistledown- and threatened to ruin her, you and the rest of your family if she did not confess. I was misguided because, I- I saw no other way to protect her. So, I.. I wrote what I did and after that, I.. I intended to never write again.”

Colin: “But you did begin writing again.. with what you said about me. When I first read it, it did not affect me- but as soon as I discovered that you are Lady Whistledown.. only then did your words cut me. It made me feel as if the one person outside my family that I care deeply about and have for years thinks so little of me.”

Penelope: “I was angry. Your words last year hurt me more than anything my mother.. my sisters.. or anyone else had ever spoken about me. I wanted the man I loved for years back; I hated when you pretended to be someone you were not. You were wearing a mask, yet even now.. I realize that it may not have been entirely your choice. I love you truly and madly and deeply- I will shout it at the top of my lungs for all of Mayfair to hear if you truly doubt that. Despite all of your imperfections, I do not love you any less.. and I pray that we will soon have better days ahead of us. Goodnight, Colin.”

Penelope kissed Colin on the cheek then went into the bedroom. He could hear her crying after she had closed the door behind her. Despite his anger, it broke his heart to hear her cry; it hurt him knowing that his anger was hurting her.. and Penelope has always been someone he never in any way wanted to hurt.

~

After over thirty minutes, there was a deafening silence lingering over Colin. There was pure silence in the bedroom as well. He got up and walked to the door. He quietly opened the door and saw that Penelope had fallen asleep. He took a deep breath in and out as he approached the bed and looked at her sleeping peacefully. His heart slightly sank when he realized that she had actually cried herself to sleep.

He kneeled down and kissed her on the forehead and whispered Penelope’s words back to her.

Colin: “I do not love you any less.. Penelope Bridgerton.”

He slowly covered her arms with the blanket so that he wouldn’t wake her.. and he took one more look at his wife before closing the door once more for the night.

For ten minutes, he sat up on the settee.. thinking about Penelope. Despite his feelings about her being Lady Whistledown, he still loves her. A tear falls down his left cheek when he begins to think about his fear of losing her. He doesn’t want to lose her.. and the thought of losing her in any way terrified him.

Pure exhaustion quickly took over and he took a deep breath.. laid down.. and finally closed his eyes.

__________________________________________

author’s note: this is the kind of conversation i wish would’ve happened in part 2 of season 3, but it didn’t- so i decided to write this. this is my first Bridgerton AU fic- hope you like it!!

[fandomzwriterk]

Can you write about the female reader teasing Smoke while cuddling? 😁

A/N: I’m collecting all the Mortal Kombat fans like Pokemon cards now and I couldn’t be more prouder

Warnigns: GN!Reader gets kidnapped + blood warning + The Lin Kuei brothers fight each other + fluffy content at the end

Smoke x GN!Reader

“This is the dumbest idea we’ve ever had.” Bi Han growled

Shang Tsung, Quan Chi, and Bi Han walked around the underground grave, looking around as the other Lin Kuei foot soldiers started building a camp to stay in. They weren’t leaving this place anytime soon.

“Well they’re our bargaining chip so they’ll come soon.”

“My brothers are not idiots.”

“Yet I know one of them is going to slip up.”

Shang Tsung and Quan Chi left, Bi Han staring at the cage Quan Chi built to keep you contained. You had two guards always watching, your leg tied by a chain so you wouldn’t even think of escape, frozen extra solid by Bi Han’s ice. He scowled at you, noticing your dirty and poor living condition. You still had open wounds all over you, pathetically covered in pieces of cloth, staining them to the point you could see the blood underneath.

“You are a pathetic excuse of a Lin Kuei soldier. I know they’ll come for you, Tomas always does.”

Some time earlier…

“I can���t climb that. What do you expect me to do? Have Kuai pull me up with ropes? Have Tomas carry me?”

You remember the scowl on Bi Han’s face, much like the one he gave you now. He hated you, you always knew that. You just never expected he’d hurt his brothers the worst way possible.

“Don’t you fucking dare!” Tomas shouted as he lunged at Quan Chi

Kuai Liang and Bi Han were fighting Shang Tsung, both trying to incapacitate him so they could bring him back to Liu Kang.

“Then why don’t I do this?” Quan Chi replied darkly

Quan Chi’s dark magic opened up under the ground, four ropes of it grabbing your arms and legs, holding you down to the ground. You struggled, but Quan Chi had strong mental power and hold of dark magic.

“This is pitiful.”

One flick of his hand and Kuai Liang and Bi Han got sent into the wall while Tomas was grabbed by one more of the dark magic ropes. He tried stabbing it, smoking away, nothing worked. Quan Chi tied down Bi Han and Kuai Liang on their knees in front of Shang Tsung, being held back by animated corpses.

“Work with me, and I can make the Lin Kuei great and feared again.”

You saw Bi Han’s eyes scan around at each of you in the room, resting them on you as you were helplessly tied down by the magic.

“Bi Han I swear on the Elder Gods if you do this-“

“And what if I did?”

“You wouldn’t hurt us, we’re your brothers, and Y/n is practically like our family too.”

“She’s family Bi Han! Don’t destroy what Father worked so hard-“

“Father was an old man who lost his mind, and I’m glad I left him to die. Now, I’m going to make sure both of you are without the distraction once more.”

Bi Han was let go, standing up as he walked over to you and crouched in front of you.

“You have no place in our family, even if you care about Tomas. You are nothing, and you always will be.”

He kicked your face, feeling the actual strength he’d been holding back from you in practice. It was painful, painful as hell. He kicked you once more, blood falling from your mouth and your eyes almost shut, but you could see his eyes staring at you with years of hatred. He was going to make everyone suffer his wrath, even his own family.

“You mother fucker!”

Quan Chi’s grip on Tomas loosened as he sent a smoke bomb out. Through the thick fog you could see Tomas move to help Kuai Liang up, starting to make his way to you.

“Get her out of here and into the tomb. She’s more valuable alive.”

Tomas and Kuai were fighting Bi Han as Shang Tsung and Quan Chi dragged your body down the cold stone hallway, as you could only watch as the room became smaller and smaller the more you got dragged away.

“You are a shame on the name of the Lin Kuei! Both of you! I am your Grandmaster and you listen to me!”

“I’m not listening to your shit anymore Bi Han! I’m going to end your reign of terror right now. Give her back now!”

“Tomas were outnumbered.”

Animated corpses crawled from under the ground, slowly going to surround both Tomas and Kuai, moving them to the edge of the stone balcony. Tomas could only fight in fear as he watched you get dragged away.

Now…

“Oh I’m going to get out of here Bi Han and when I do, I’m going to make sure you suffer for what you did to your brothers.”

“Ha! Not by the grace of the Elder Gods you won’t. You have no chance of even making it out of this room alive. You’d be dead before you could even think of fighting back.”

You wanted to curse him out, call him a bastard, but you knew words weren’t going to do anything now. You could see his smug expression while he crossed his arms, staring down at you like a dog in the streets.

“It’s been five days, I doubt they’ll be coming for you.”

Five days… this had been hell on Earth for you. Little did you know, somebody was making his way inside. Eventually, Bi Han followed Shang Tsung and left you alone with two foot soldiers. Even if you tried to escape now, the chain on your ankle would stop you. Your body felt weak, feeling faint at the loss of blood that seeped into the dirt you sat on. So, you closed your eyes, praying someone would save you as you fell to the ground.

“Hey! Y/n! Tomas over here!” You heard

Your hearing was starting to sound like you were going underwater, the pain slowly drifting away and you felt lighter, feeling calm as your eyes remained closed.

“No no no no! Y/n! Wake up!”

Through the darkness and light feeling, you could feel someone holding you, putting your body against their chest as they stood and picked you up, walking fast as more voices began to speak.

“Liu Kang!”

“Time to go! Right now!”

You felt the person holding you tightly, their grip never letting go as you felt warmth start to touch your skin. You still felt faint, but the warmth was brining back the sounds you could hear. After some time, you opened your eyes, staring at a white ceiling as you felt your body stiffen up while you tried to sit up. Your vision was blurry, slowly becoming clear as you blinked. You looked down, Tomas’ head laid on top of your hand, feeling the fact he was holding it too. He seemed tired. Had he been looking for you? As if he could hear your thoughts, he looked up, eyes red and puffy from crying. He jumped into you, hugging you like his life depended on it.

“You’re okay. Thank the Elder Gods.”

His grip tightened, holding on to you like it would be his last. Tomas pulled back a little, staring into your eyes as he brushed a strand of hair out of your eyes, tucking it behind your ear. For the first time since you’ve met him, you could finally see his smile. You could see him, the real Tomas, who wasn’t hiding anything from you. You put a hand on his cheek, seeing all the worry and hurt in his eyes. He loved you, more than you could ever know.

“I’m okay Tomas. I’m okay.”

“Good. Cause your dumbass had me worried!”

“Eh?! What does that mean?”

“You are such a dumbass for getting caught.”

“And you’re an even bigger dumbass for letting me get caught.”

You booped his nose, something you often did as kids whenever you teased each other. It was an old habit that even now, as a young man, Tomas still loved.

“But seriously… did Shang Tsung do anything to you?”

“No… I didn’t really see him. It was mostly Bi Han that was around.”

Tomas frowned, moving to sit next to you as he helped you lean against the wall on your medical bed. His silver hair was a mess, having been fluffed up by smothering you. Your hand reached up, trailing along the side of his face, admiring the small scars on his face while you fixed his hair.

“There. Now you look cute.”

“Hm I think I’m always cute… according to you at least.”

“Oh you are so getting when I’m better.”

You leaned against him, head leaning against his shoulder. Your hand drifted, grabbing his hand in yours.

“I promise to never do anything like that again.”

He turned his head, staring at you with his silver-blue eyes, a smile on his face.

“And I promise that while I’m around, nothing is going to happen to you my love.”

A/N: I feel like I did TERRIBLE on this but I’m glad I could do your request☺️ I like writing for everyone!

[roxygen22]

ABCs

"My Little Cocoa Bean" Series

Summary: 4-year-old Ben (AKA Bean) starts to learn his ABCs

C/W: None that I can think of, 100% tooth-rotting fluff

<><><><>

Willy came home from the factory a little earlier than normal one winter day to hear you and Ben chattering excitedly in the study. Not wanting to interrupt, he quietly tiptoed his way to the door and leaned on the frame to take in the scene.

It was too cold to play outside, so you made the most of being stuck indoors. You and Ben were sitting on the rug in front of the fire, your backs to the door and surrounded by papers with a few large, handwritten letters. "Alright, Benny, let's go over these one more time before Papa gets home." Willy hid himself further behind the door frame so he didn't spoil their practice time.

"What letter is this?" You asked as you held up a paper.

Ben concentrated. After a brief pause, he confidently announced, "A."

"Very good! What sound does it make?"

"Aaaaaapple," he exaggerated. "Nood-uhl, nood-uhl, apple stood-uhl," he sang. "We go see her?"

"Maybe tomorrow. I'm sure she will love to hear about your progress. Now, what's this?" You held up Ben's favorite letter, never getting enough of the reaction it elicited.

"B is for buh-BEAN!!" Threw up his arms in excitement with such force that he rolled to his back and spotted Willy at the door. "Oh - hi, Papa! You look upside down," Ben giggled as he splayed out on the floor like a starfish.

You looked back to see Willy kneel down with a gleam in his eyes. "Huh, you look upside down, too, Bean. Let's fix that." But instead of helping the boy upright, he picked him up by the legs. "Oh no!" Willy gasped with fake alarm. "Bean is going to see the world upside down for the rest of his life." Now you were giggling, too. You were in love with an overgrown boy, apparently.

Ben laughed and laughed. "No, Papa, you hold me upside down!"

"Oh goodness gracious, my apologies, young sir." Willy flipped Ben upright and set him on his hip. "Is that better?"

"You silly, Papa. Do again!" Willy dipped him backward a couple more times before he sat down in the arm chair with Ben in his lap.

"Alright, back to business. Can you tell me what you learned today?" You handed Willy the sheets of letters.

"A is for aaaapple. B is for BEAN," he shouted.

"And Ben, and Benjamin, and Benny," you reminded. The boy had procured a number of names in his short four years.

"What letter is next, Bean?" Willy asked as he flipped to the next page. You had not yet covered the letter C, so you weren't sure how Ben would respond.

"Umm..." the boy looked at you tentatively. You shook your head at Willy, who tilted his head up in acknowledgment. He decided to continue on with the lesson himself.

"C is for cat! That was one of the first words Aunt Noodle taught me. Want to know what else starts with C? Chocolate!" Willy scooped Ben up with one arm and helped you up with the other. With his family in his arms, he started to waltz and spin around the study singing, "Only Wonka's makes your eyes pop out their sock-elets!"

After a few minutes of dancing, the whole family plopped down on the sofa to catch their breaths. Willy was sandwiched between the two of you, your head on one shoulder and Ben's on the other. He looked down at his two loves and breathed out a contented sigh before kissing Ben on the crown of his head. "You're doing great, Bean. I am very proud of you. Soon you will know how to put those letters together to spell words. I was FIVE TIMES your age before I learned, so you are way ahead of me."

Ben looked up at Willy with wide eyes. "Aunt Nood-uhl teach you?"

"Yes, and it was hard, but it was even harder to go through life without knowing how to read. Which is why I'm glad your mother is teaching you early." Now it was your turn for a kiss on the head.

"Papa, we go to lie-berry tomorrow?"

"Sure, Bean. We'll stop by on our way to the factory. Aunt Noodle said she has a book for you about animals. It even has tigers and giraffes! Two very important words to know how to spell..."

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MASTERLIST

[amiserableseriesofevents]

when they figure out they do laundry veryy differently (like whether or not they separate colors/whites, how they fold, how often laundry is done, etc.) 🥰🥰

The end of a lazy afternoon finds John sprawled on the couch with Meatball next to him, snoring quietly as John plays some Legend of Zelda on the tv.

They're waiting for Buck to come home from a shift at West Anglia and John personally hopes he'll arrive with some news about the latest endeavors of Marge and Rosie, aka the Most Unlikely Duo as John and Benny call them. Buck isn't usually one for gossip, especially when Marge is involved, but the constant push-pull of the couple is too much even for him.

When the door of the apartment – their apartment, John reminds himself with a proud grin – opens Meatball immediately runs to Buck and John pauses the game, waiting on the couch. “Welcome back doll, how's it going?” He shoots loud towards the entryway.

Buck steps into the living room with Meatball at his heels, cheeks reddened and hair askew from the bike ride home. “S'doing well, better now here at home. Did you guys have fun? Went for a you know what?” He asks, leaning over the back of the couch to kiss John on the lips.

“Yeah, we did go to the park and shared a sandwich,” John answers, stealing another kiss. “And then we cleaned the bedroom, prepped dinner, and folded the laundry that was in the dryer.”

“That's good, I think it's just time for another round of washing. I'm gonna take a quick shower then I'll help you with the dinner, ok?”

“Sure love, take your time. Oh, any news about our favorite couple?” John teases. Buck rolls his eyes. “I'll tell you later,” he says, and with another kiss he's gone before John can complain. Sighing, he starts the game and plays for a few more minutes before Buck's voice gets to his ears.

“John, sweetheart, can you come here a moment?”

And John's blood immediately turns to ice because if there's a thing he's learnt in this past year and a half he's spent with Buck it's that when he uses pet names like this, he's just about to murder him in cold blood.

“Yeah sure doll, I'm coming!” John shouts back and goes to their bedroom, feigning nonchalance. Buck's standing next to their bed – neatly made with the space-patterned sheets Marge has gifted them for their new home – and is staring at the piles of laundry John has folded earlier.

“Yes, doll?”

“Care to explain what is this?” Buck asks pointing at the laundry.

“It's the laundry I took from the dryer and folded.”

“And why, pray tell, did you fold it like that?”

Puzzled, John looks at the folded towels. “What do you mean like that? How else was I supposed to fold them? That's the body towels pile, that's the hand towels pile, that's...”

“Are you serious? You're telling me you did that on purpose?”

With a sigh John turns to Buck. “Buck, my love, I'm gonna need you to be more clear because I understand you're pissed but I have no idea why,” he tells him – hell yeah, he's been working really hard on his communication issues.

“You're supposed to fold them by sets! The blue body towel with the blue hand towel, the green body towel with the green hand towel, and so on!” Buck exclaims, so astonished he doesn't even sound angry anymore.

“But that doesn't make sense. What if you only need the body towel?”

“It's a set! You're supposed to use them together, why would you only need one?! Who raised you, John Clarence Egan?!”

John gasps, outraged. “Hey now, there's no need for middle names! And I'll let you know, my mother didn't care about how the laundry was folded: however it would fit into the closet was just about right.”

Buck looks at him in suspicion. “You never folded your stuff once in your whole life, did you?” He asks.

“Well, not when my mom could complain about it. But the guys...”

“Oh shut up about the guys, I've seen how they keep their changing rooms and I am actually afraid to learn how they fold their laundry,” Buck cuts him off with a shudder. Then he exhales, and relaxes his shoulders just a bit. “Next time could you please fold them by sets? I promise it's more practical.”

“I'll try and remember that. I'm sorry, I had no idea you had such strong opinions on laudry,” John says, tugging Buck closer to place a kiss on his head.

“I have strong opinions on things that matter,” the other grumbles. “I'm going to load the washing machine now, do you have more whites to put in?”

“Yeah, there's your white shirt in the bathroom, I put the stain remover on that coffee stain on the wrist earlier and it should be ready to wash now.”

It's Buck's turn to look puzzled. “The what?”

“The stain remover? The one that's specific for coffee stains?”

A beat. “We don't have that.”

“Yes we do? In the cupboard? Along with one specific for wine stains and one for makeup?”

Buck still looks at him like he's grown a third eye. “Now you're just fucking with me,” he says but he sounds uncertain.

John raises his eyebrows at him. “Gale Winston Cleven,” he spells out, and smirks at Buck's consequential eye roll. “Are you telling me you don't use stain removers when you do your laundry?”

“Of course I do, but a generic one! Why on earth would I need a specific one for every kind of stain?”

“Well in case you didn't notice, all the coffee stains on your shirts have been disappearing much faster lately. And the wine I spilled on your trousers at the restaurant? Yeah that's gone too. Because I put the specific stain remover on it,” John explains.

“I'm still not convinced that we actually need that kind of stuff,” Buck says.

“Trust me, you'll see it the next time I leave makeup stains on your collar after a show,” John shoots back with a wink. Buck seems like he's pondering it for a minute, then he slowly nods. “That did go away pretty fast the last time, you're right. Wait, you're telling me you've been using your fancy stain removers on my stuff? Why?”

“Well I cannot possibly let you go around with coffee stains on all your white shirts; who would take you seriously then, Professor Cleven?”

Buck smirks at that, the nickname always hitting him just right. “I'd say from now on, you do the washing and I do the folding? So everyone's happy?” He suggests.

“Deal,” John says pulling him closer again for another kiss. “I like how we're managing this, moving in together and dividing the responsibilities. It makes us sound like two healthy adults, don't you think?”

Buck can't hide a smile against John's lips. “I love it too, coming home and finding you here, you taking care of my laundry, helping you cook dinner... maybe we actually are two healthy adults.”

“Mh, don't count on it,” is John's response, and Buck laughs at it and extricates himself from the hug, finally walking to the bathroom. “I'll leave the washing to you then!” He says closing the door behind him.

“Sure doll! I can't wait to wash all your white shirts with one of my red socks and see what happens. I bet you'd look good in pink!” John says.

The bathroom door reopens in an instant, angry blue eyes shining through the crack. “Don't you dare.”

[beaniebeensbaby201]

SOULMATES

Lmk for pt2

Jake Sully x reader

Summary: y/n and Jake have had feelings for each other for a while. The only problem is that y/n's parents have forced her to be mated with Zo'at who was a great warrior. (Her parents are very close friends with Mo'at and Eytukan,(to make it clearer Mo'at is y/n's Aunt.)This is before the battle in the first film.

Fluff, angst,? Lmk for smut in pt 2

It was night, many people in the village had gone to sleep except two Na'Vi's. Jake sully and y/n who were yet to be tired.

"Where are we going?" Y/n continues to giggle as she hops over the branches as she stares up at the forest.

The forest glowed, Jake grabs onto her tail as she giggled once again.

"You'll see! Come!" She takes his hand in hers as she calls for her Ikran.

"Won't we get in trouble?" Jake asked not wanting to get on the bad side of her uncle.

"Please, I'm the master at sneaking out. I used to teach Neytiri when we were younger so we could swim at night, or have sleepovers together." Jake smiled, her heart stopped as she felt her cheeks burn.

She knew she was wrong for falling for another man, essentially a Dreamwalker. She didn't love Zo'at as he was too hard headed, as Jake was kind, he cared for her feelings and they held a close bond with one another.

Jake hopped onto The great leonopteryx(Neytiri mated with Tsu'tey as she knew she was not meant for Jake).

I looked to my left at Jake as he was already looking at me, his eyes held a different meaning, but I could not tell what it was.

I was nervous, as Jake was going to be one of us tomorrow, he was meant to find a woman, and he would be able to make a bow from the home tree. I know I was meant to be with Zo'at, but I do not love him.

Jake and I raced up the mountain I found while I was riding my Ikran earlier today.

"Where are we going?" He asked, I pointed up as he followed my finger.

"You'll love the view!" I shouted over the wind as I looked back at him.

We finally reached the mountain as our Ikrans were resting near each other.

"How did you find this place?" I hummed as I squatted, looking down as I saw the Sacred tree.

"I got into an argument with my parents today. They want me to mate with Zo'at soon." I sighed, closing my eyes as I sat down on my butt, my legs dangling as I stared down.

"What did you say?" Jake said, nobody in the clan knows that we were secretly together, besides Neytiri as she would help me lie when I am not there.

I smiled sadly, as I played with the end of my braid where my tsaheylu is.

I hadn't realized I was crying until I felt the tears fall down my cheeks.

"My parents found out about us, they do not want me to teach you our ways. Neytiri will be taking over, starting tomorrow. We can not be seen anymore." I let out a heave as I was trying to hold back a sob.

"I do not love him Jake, I love you!" I cried, getting up from my spot by the edge of the cliff I let out a shout.

"You shouldn't let your parents control who you should love." I shake my head.

"Mo'at is my aunt, she wants me to be the next leader after Neytiri. I am meant to be the nest Tsahik. My mother wants me to mate and bond with Zo'at. He is so arrogant, he thinks he's mighty he is not for me. I told them that I have found a mate, but when they realized who it was they told me to leave you." Jake takes my hand in his as I was now facing him, but I could not look into his green eyes.

"Zo'at and I have grown up together. My parents have decided since the day we have first met. We were seven, but I am twenty years old now. I am not a child anymore, I could choose the man I love without my parents consent. You are who I want. Even if you are a skydemon, but I do not see you that way." I rambled, my heart continued to shatter.

I felt his hands leave mine as he places them on my chin, forcing me to look at him.

"I love you, y/n. The niece of Mo'at, the next heir of the Tsahik. It's your choice to decide, it's not there's." Jake jabs his arms to the direction of the hometree.

His voice rasps, I lean my head on his chest as he wraps his arms around me.

"I'm sorry Jake, but I can not love you. We have to go our separate ways now Ma Jake." I could hear his heart beat pounding against my ear a his arms around me tighten.

I felt something tickle my skin as I noticed it was one of the seeds from the sacred tree. I let out a soft gasp as many more circle us. There has to be about thirty of them circling us.

"Atokerina." I whispered, Jake hums as the vibrations from his chest tickle my cheek.

"What does that mean?" I stayed silent, as I did not know the answer myself.

"Eywa." I whisper under my breath.

"What does Eywa have to do with us?" I slowly let go of my grasp on Jake, as he continues to keep his hand on my cheek, only for it to fall to my neck.

I held my hand out as three of them softly drop on my hand.

"She wants us to be together. But my parents would not allow it, there isn't a way for us to be together." But many more came after I said this.

"I don't think Eywa liked your response." Jake said in a teasing voice, but also serious at the same time.

"We're meant to be y/n." I let out a frustrated sound, not knowing what to do.

Soon the Atokerina's disappeared as Jake and I continued to stare at the trail of floating seeds of the tree of souls.

"Tomorrow, meet me here. I want to be with you Jake Sully. I do not care what my family thinks of me, we've been together for months without them realizing, I am happy with you. Zo'at is not the one I want, it is you." I leaned up on my toes, as he was a bit taller then me.

I connect our lips together, I let out a sigh as our lips meet. I could not live without him, he is mine, and I was his.

[haptureratch]

Bitch, You Need Therapy

Pairing: Johnny Knoxville x Reader (afab)

Others: Chris Pontius, Steve-O

Word count: approx. 4.5k

Synopsis: You’re part of the crew, temporarily filling in and enjoying it immensely. You are filming something overseas. Knoxville finds out you have a crush on him and decides to fuck with your stressed little self until he gets carried away in the moment.

WARNINGS/tags: NC-17, minors DNI, adult language, alcohol (technical lack of consent), soft allusions to hard drugs, oral sex, genital penetration, THE DOUBLE MEANING OF LIPS, kinks galore (praise, rough, petnames, things I don’t have a word for)

Notes from the author: Yeah idk he just seems like a playful bastard that might be hiding a kinky streak. Not tied to any specific period of Jackass filming so reader can take some creative liberties (the least I can do when I am dictating reader’s entire personality lmao). Knoxville is single in this world; it’s all fun & fantasy. This work has not been officially reviewed apart from one of my best friends giving enthusiastic approval early on. But I’ve read over it a hundred times while writing it SO DAMN SLOWLY, so hopefully it is okay. There are purposeful tense changes and I hope they hit the way I'm intending. Is the whole thing cringe? Maybe; maybe not. Pls let loose & enjoy! I am a long time reader and I’ve had ideas here and there; finally decided it was time to fuck around and find out myself. It’s been way harder than I thought and I have even more respect for my fave fic authors out there. If you know me irl, no you don’t. WITHOUT FURTHER ADIEU~~

Night has been falling earlier and earlier as weeks peel away from Autumn toward the year’s end. It is 7 o’clock in the evening but feels more like 11. Outside the darkness is interrupted by numerous streetlamps along the sidewalk. The lights glow a golden orange, reminding you of the crackling fire in the pub, and you dig your hands into your coat pockets seeking warmth.

“HEY ASSHOLE, why did we leave that cozy fucking place?!” you shout over the wind at one of your walking companions with some frustration. Only some. You’ve had a couple drinks and your speech seems to come out in demanding exclamations regardless of any real anger at that point. And you’re fairly certain any frustration stems from unmet desires directed toward this man and his stupid glinty purple-tinted sunglasses. Sunglasses, which he wore inside the intimately lit pub and which he is still wearing outside at night. What a jackass.

A different, unsunglasses’d man answered. “Because adventure calls! Sure, it’s cold out. But not cold enough to get frostbite. The call to adventure must be heeded even in the face of Ice Queen Mother Nature. Like the Russian Police, she’s stern. Stern…but fair,” he announced with omnipotence. Everyone in the group seemed dead set on committing crimes this evening. This one was guilty of venturing out in 20-some degree weather without a coat or sweater or torso cover of any kind. Just a fluffy scarf and a Santa hat. Another jackass, you thought. But that’s why you jumped at the chance to work with these people. It was an invigorating break from the mundane. And the group oozed fun; to be in the same room as any of them was to know friendship and laughter.

You smiled genuinely at him. Despite the cold and questionable decisions, he still inspired affection. “Thanks, as always, Pontius, for the exceptional pep talk but I think I was asking—”

“DUDE WHERE IS MY SKATEBOARD?!?!!” screeched a third man’s voice. He’d definitely had the most to drink out of the group so far this evening and crime was written all over him. Good ol’ Steve-O. Nothing more to be said about him.

Sunglasses finally spoke up. “I decided against anything with wheels for this and threw it in the back of the van, Steve-O. We can come back in the daytime tomorrow for skate shots. There are a lot less lights the farther in the park we go.”

“Knox, you IDIOT, I’m planning on being so fucking hungover tomorrow! I’m on my GAME now, man, you shoulda brought it!” He bent down to gather up two fists of snow, mash them together, and hurl the mass toward Johnny.

“If you want it so bad, go back an’ get it!” He grinned while dodging the poorly aimed snowball and jumped over to rap Steve-O on the ass with the back of his hand. This garnered a slow, deep, huffy giggling from Pontius. It was less of a giggle, more of a devious huh-huh-huh. It sounded like something you’d hear in the boys’ locker room but if it came from the throat of a grown man.

The little spanking sparked a quick scuffle between Steve-O and Johnny. After nearly slipping and falling, he gave up on trying to fuck with the taller man and hardened his resolve to skate in the snow. “UGH! I’ll be back…” After a beat of wily consideration he added, “Or not!” Steve-O then darted off in the direction of the pub, almost slipped again, and slowed his stumbling gait. If he was headed toward booze he was probably going to get another round. A round of…something.

Chris and Johnny shared a look and the Santa-hatted one asked, “Who’s going with him? It’s law that we use the buddy system in all foreign lands, especially when we don’t want to get arrested. More arrested than we get when the cameras are rolling. Those times are okay.”

Johnny spoke first. “I’ll stay to map out where Jeff thinks we can get the money shots. Y/N probably needs to mess with the camera settings.”

“Actually, yeah,” you uttered, reviving from a slight stupor of quiet observation and remembering your role in all of this. “This would be our first night footage of the trip and I haven’t experimented with the exposure or what type of flash I can—”

“Okay nerd on, genius, I’ll go,” Chris interrupted. He smiled and bowed himself out in the direction of Steve-O and the pub.

“Better hurry, Pontius! Something tells me the board ain’t the priority now,” Johnny called out. You watched as the smoke from his breath dissipated into the cold and the two of you continued away from what seemed like the rest of civilization.

********

The other men gone from sight, your physical awareness of Johnny dialed up. Though he was lean, he seemed to exude heat through his black peacoat. Maybe you were imagining things. But you dared to draw a couple inches closer to assess. He slowed his gait and you veered right back over and even sped up a little. You thought you heard a quiet laugh come from his side of the path.

‘Dammit, Y/N, fucking stay focused,’ you thought to yourself. You can’t give them anything to get you on; it was more important to you than any legal trouble. You were here to relieve Lance after one too many trips involving vomit-on-the-camera incidents. You had a job to do, you had creative input to offer, and you didn’t have to let on that you found one of the guys so hot you couldn’t stand it. That fact could be kept firmly TO YOURSELF. The need to keep it a secret almost hyped it up to an obsession. You found yourself stealing photos during planning sessions, when you were 95% certain that no one would notice. Since you were such a dedicated crew member, the team assumed you were experimenting with angles or compiling a look-book or something.

Sure, you took candids of everyone. But the most recurring subject by far was Johnny Knoxville. There were the obvious features that caught your eye, mostly when he laughed, all white teeth and crow’s feet. After a while you noticed how he stood kind of funny, whether that was from past back injuries, weak glutes, or a touch of valgus knee deformity you weren’t sure. It didn’t at all detract from the beauty of those long legs or the defined torso they led up to. Certainly didn’t ruin his painfully (for you) deep iliac furrows smack dab in the middle of it all. And you weren’t going to get started on his arms or shoulders or jawline. He really took your love for anatomy and smacked you upside the head with it. He was art and you were insane.

Your stupid little fangirl crush even had you calling him ‘Johnny Knoxville’ in your head instead of PJ. It was like how you still called your teachers ‘Mr/Ms/Mx’ after graduating from school, even though they gave you permission to be on a first-name basis. It was hard to get comfortable with others like that. Another reason why you wanted this chance at a different work environment even if it was just temporary. You sorely needed to relax, Y/N. Unclench your jaw, take a breath, stop the shoulders from migrating upwards, and just keep walking. Sometimes the set of Jackass was not the ideal setting to work on those goals—all of those damn pranks—but…

“Lost in thought, puddin’?” you heard in your ear. You didn’t so much hear them as felt the words slap your skin from behind, the shock of wet heat in the cold air startling you. The streetlamps brightened in your peripheral vision.

You spun around and couldn’t help the nervous fake-laugh that escaped. “Oh, uh, yeah, you could say that. Just handling a lot of little things right now. Like the jet-lag, that European alcohol hitting a little stronger, the cold being colder here somehow, filming schedule, the list goes on, man." You hoped adding 'man’ would lend the illusion of you being chill, cool, totally not in fight-or-flight mode a moment ago.

It didn’t. There was an awkward silence as he stood facing you. Behind the shades you couldn’t see the mischief in his eyes as he planned out where he was going to take this. To you it just looked like staring. ‘Fucking dammit,’ you swore at yourself, ‘I don’t know if he KNOWS knows but he knows something is up. Agh, focus on work, FOCUS ON WORK.’

You cleared your throat, pulled namaste out of your ass, and shifted the power of the interaction back on your side with, “Hey, why don’t you stand over by that statue and help me with shot composition.”

“Yes, boss, on the double!” His tone was playfully condescending as he headed over to the metal figure, an unknown man outlined in snow. “Anything for you, sweetheart.” He let the last word drag out lower and slower than the rest. You had to fight your dead brain to let you breathe again. He was going to fuck with you, alright, and it was going to happen tonight. But for his own fun, no cameras in sight other than yours. There was always a chance of one of those goofy assholes hiding in a bush, but your gut told you there were none. No one else was going to be around for this, but you weren’t sure how thankful you were. You were flooded with several thoughts at once. How far would he go? How far did you want him to go? Did Jackass have HR? What was their policy on a creator/actor doing unspeakable things to a camera person with his mouth? Could the van be moved for about 90 minutes tonight without anyone knowing? Was he all dom or a switch? How easy would it be to get him to giggle during a blowjob?

Fuck. Focus.

‘FUCK,’ you thought as, for some ungodly reason, Knox put his tongue to the statue’s ear. The side of your neck began to tingle where his breath had been several minutes ago; memory is a powerful thing. You shook your head to regroup.

“Better pray you don’t end up like that kid in A Christmas Story,” you deadpanned.

He looked away and called out toward the woods at the edge of the park, “Nah, I’m too wet for that. That…that’s the secret.” You saw his back shuddering slightly, probably with laughter, and tried to see deeper into the trees. Not a soul was detected.

“You’ll be wetter when that statue comes to life and throws you in the river.”

He turned back toward you. “Naw, I think he likes it,” he grinned as wedged his body even closer to the metal and began to run a hand slowly down its torso. For the first time he made eye contact with you over his glasses and you dared not break it while his hand migrated further and further south. “And I think he’s not the only one, darlin’,” he drawled, his tone growing deeper and darker by the second. Two fingers began to lazily graze between the statue’s legs. And, as if that wasn’t enough, his hips ground into what had to be extremely cold and extremely hard metal. He let out a low sigh into the winter air.

This probably lasted just a moment but it felt like an eternity as you stood watching him, unable to do anything else, not quite believing what you were seeing. Your eyes were glued to where you thought his dick was, where you thought you saw an outline begin to show. He kept at it, grinding and sighing and caressing against that fucking statue, only averting his gaze to let his eyes roll back into his head and flutter shut. Which he made sure you could see with the shades slid all the way down the bridge of his nose. The whole thing was insane but you could not stop the cascade of heat and desire from building inside you. It’s like the more it shouldn’t be happening, the more you were into it. You wanted to look around and check for the crew for the umpteenth time but couldn’t tear your eyes from him. Johnny Knoxville was getting freaky on a statue to tease you and you were simmering in your own juices.

Like.

What the actual fuck?

Okay, case closed, he definitely knew.

Uhh… Just try to own it now?

“You know what, you whore?! It’s gonna be really fucking awkward when my underwear freezes out here!”

He finally broke, fell away from the statue, and dissolved into laughter on the ground. You hoped your boldness would recuperate a bit of your cred and he’d back off. (You hoped he wouldn’t back off.)

“The working conditions, here, honestly…” you said as your hands came to your hips.

His maniacal glee, normally adorable when it wasn’t tied up in such a stressful and sexy situation, died out and he regained upright footing. He didn’t bother to brush the snow off his coat or shake out what had peppered his hair. He took off his sunglasses and folded them into the inner pocket of his coat. He smiled down at you and you felt him gently grab your shoulders. “You’re so wound up, Y/N,” he remarked with genuine care in his voice.

The touch and proximity made you stiffen; your arms dropped to your sides. His breath smelled like booze and you wanted to drown in it.

His fingers laced together behind your shoulders and slid down to rest at the small of your back; you instinctively grabbed at his forearms. “Gotta learn how to relax, baby.” He jerked your lower half into him and you could feel that you had not, in fact, been imagining that dick. With that, you felt the last of your good sense rocket away, leaving a long-imprisoned whine in its wake.

He dipped his head down to your ear and growled, “How loud does that kitty purr?”

No words.

No thoughts.

Your head threatened to crack off of your spine but he caught the back of it with one hand, the other snaked firmly around the rest of you, as his lips made contact with your neck. Soft kisses were syncopated with nibbles, the heat of his mouth searing your skin in contrast to the chilly air. His tongue was so wet and so warm against your flesh. You all but dripped for him.

“Van,” you demand.

He takes your hand, grins, and leads you out of the park toward the town.

The two of you make it to the van and he takes space in the driver’s seat. The engine comes to life relatively quietly—thank god for hybrids—and he maneuvers it onto a darkened side street several blocks down. You seem to be surrounded by a bunch of businesses closed down for the night but you also don’t have a single fuck to give now. You slide a hand over the rod in his pants and his lips part with a groan.

Hunger takes hold and you lunge over the console to catch his mouth in a voracious kiss. Tongue and teeth everywhere. Even the smallest hints of pleasure out of this man are going to drive you wild tonight. But you want—you NEED—to savor the experience. The movements of your jaw slow and the space between your lips closes as you center yourself. His lips come together but his breath continues hard and deep through his nose. His eyes are shut tight as if he's exercising control as well. You pepper kisses across his cheek, down his neck, and back up to his ear where you sigh your contentment.

“Mmm, sweetheart, I’m gonna need to hear more of that,” he says low in your ear. Your belly flutters up into your chest and you think you might fall in love, like an idiot.

He kisses you deeply and pulls you with him into the back of the van. The heat of the exchange melts off both your coats. A sleeping bag is found, unzipped, and laid down. Not that the two of you notice the cold all that much, it just seems like the right thing to do in a van that carts around the Jackass crew. He is a bit more discerning than some of his co-stars.

He unzips your pants and slides them down your legs. You sit up to help kick them off along with your shoes. He takes off your shirt, leaving you just in your bra, socks, and panties. You love how exposed you must look and how vulnerable you feel. He looks you in the eye, smirks, looks down at your hips, licks his lips. Your thighs squeeze together with anticipation and your moan spells out your need.

He lowers himself down, still clothed, onto your nearly naked body and lays his lips all over your skin. He slides across you lazily and you can’t stand how good his clothes feel against you. You can’t wait for that dick to be out and in your mouth. It’s how you want to show him how good he’s making you feel. The way he takes the fabric of your panties in his fingertips tells you he has his own priorities.

“May I?”

“May you what?”

He smiles and toys with the bows stitched to the elastic around your hips. He takes the band in his teeth and looks you in the eye as he lets it snap against you.

“Eat out that pretty pussy of yours, doll. It’s all wrapped up for me like a present under the tree.”

You’re not able to make a joke about stealing Chris’s Santa hat. You can only reach down and start to wiggle the remaining cotton off, with which Knox happily helps. The bra and socks follow suit and a cheeky kiss to your foot garners a giggle.

Things get very serious again when he positions his face in front of your heat. He hugs your hips to him and rests his large hands down on you. You can’t help but buck up into the contact when his lips meet yours. His soft, wet tongue feels so fucking good. Your hands find his hair and you rake your nails through it. Every time you look down he’s either got his eyes closed, lids fluttering in the prettiest way, or he’s looking right back at you. Each moan from your mouth elicits self-assured hums from his and it drives you to desperately need more.

“Need you in me, Knox,” you demand.

He looks up at you again with those deep brown eyes and doesn’t say a word.

“Want you in my mouth first. I want to taste that dick.”

He pulls himself up and you all but tear the black and white KNOXVILLE belt through the loops of his Dickies. He frees his hard cock and you pause to take it in with your eyes first.

“It may not be the biggest but right now you got me harder than—aaughh..” The whole rest of him stiffens up and he bites into his knuckles as you take in the tip. He relaxes with a deep sigh as you try to swallow the shaft down and gag when your lips meet his hilt.

‘That’ll do just fine,’ you think to yourself.

You keep it slow to draw it out, slow but deliberate with licking and sucking. You work his cock with your mouth until you lose yourself in the act. You love every single sound this man is making and commit them to memory. And his taste, how the pre-cum doesn’t stop oozing. The way his head is thrown back with his mouth wide open, gasping. How he can’t touch you enough right now. Every few moments you turn your attention to his balls and thighs and that delicious V leading down to it all. The feel and scent of his skin is intoxicating and you’re biting light marks into his flesh. You get so far gone you stop murmuring his name and start to call him Daddy. His cock twitches every time.

He takes a deep, clarifying breath before taking your chin in his hand and speaking, “I’m so ready to slide right in, baby. Will you let Daddy fill you up?”

“Fuck me.”

The van space is tight but you lie down and he holds himself over you, cock at your entrance. You’re practically vibrating with anticipation.

Finally.

He drives the head of his cock slowly into your pussy and the feeling is so warm and sweet and intimate. Birth control be damned; you’ll get emergency contraception in the morning. Your arms and legs wrap around him possessively as he works into a rhythm. You rock your hips with his to catch his cock at the right angle. He finds your mouth in the dark and moans into you as he thrusts. He’s downright fucking you into the floor of the van and strangely you haven’t felt this whole and alive in a long time. Your orgasm is building and building but you want even more of him before you come.

“I wanna ride you, Johnny,” you gasp.

“Thought you’d never ask. Be my guest, doll,” he answers as he pulls out of you and arranges the sleeping bag across the van’s bench. He takes a seat and slaps his thighs with a grin, erection bobbing around invitingly.

You climb on top of him, legs quivering with eagerness, and take just a moment to pause before sinking slowly down onto his cock.

His answering groan draws you against his chest, sighing into him, as you get to work riding. It’s your turn to fuck him into the van.

You both wrap your arms around each other, but no one can get close enough. Thrusting, humping, clawing, kissing, biting, sucking, moaning—the two of you going at each other like animals. (His glutes are NOT, in fact, weak.) Your legs are tiring but you push yourself to keep going. Closer and closer your end nears. He knows it because his teeth are clenching as your pussy is tightening around him. He’s fighting to not cum before you.

“Don’t stop, baby, don’t stop. Keep on riding me. Keep grinding that sweet little thing on my cock.”

You pick up speed.

“Come for me, sweetheart.”

He squeezes your ass tighter.

“Good girl, I can feel it. Come for Daddy…”

That’s it. Your cunt squeezes up inside of you and smashes down around his dick in a primal, undulating frenzy. There’s an explosion of stars behind your eyelids. He’s yelling out your name and digging his fingers deeper into your hips as his orgasm spills hot inside you.

********

After unmeasured moments, breaths began to slow and a contented stillness fell over the van like snow upon the ground. The two of you wrapped each other up in an embrace and held on tight without a word. It wasn’t much longer until your brain woke back up and began to wander. You knew you were going to think back on this night many, many times when you were back home alone. You’d feel the ghost of his breath and his lips on your skin. You’d ache to hear him moan your name again. AND, FUCK, THE PLAN B--

Gentle laughter broke out, as if he could read your mind. He couldn’t, of course. But it was so very easy to tell when you were uneasy. And Knox was an excellent people reader.

“Just don’t think about anything right now, sweetheart,” he assured you.

“Johnny, I…” You began and trailed off, unsure of what to voice first.

“Call me PJ,” he smiled and placed a kiss on your head. “And don’t you worry about a thing. I’ll stop by a pharmacy soon as they open. The guys are gonna need some Tylenol, too, I bet. I’ll get us all sorted.” And he sealed his promise shut with a squeeze of your shoulders. Not a mind reader, but definitely thoughtful and at times very practical. Always aware of what’s going on around him.

You trusted him. Probably more than you should, but you did. And you gave whatever energy you had left over to the effort of not thinking. You had no idea how long it had been since you checked the time, when the sun was coming up, or what the two of you would do next. What this would mean for the rest of the shoot. But, if you’re gonna be dumb….

----------------------------------------------------------------

Several hours post-coupling in the van, after the sun came out for vengeance, you found yourself hanging with Pontius at a near-by café. You felt calmest around him out of all the crew and were happy to listen to his stories for distraction. Distraction from your anxiety and the various aches in your body. What you had really wanted was a diner that served greasy food and heinously strong coffee, but they didn’t have those here. Chris must share the need. He was still sporting the Santa hat and some serious bags under his eyes. There was what appeared to be lipstick smeared down his neck, but it was…stippled? From…the only idea that came to mind was another man’s stubble. But he never asked about the way you weren’t walking right, so you paid the favor forward.

His words drifted away from big cats and other wildlife, and he shifted conversation topics. “Crazy night last night, huh,” he said.

“Lord. You bet,” you answered. Oh, here we go.

“What time did you turn in last night? Or this morning?” He batted his lashes and played with the cotton puff at the end of his hat before flipping it to the other side. It invoked the atmosphere of girlies at a sleepover sharing the latest gossip.

“Oh, you know…” Your face reddened a little and you looked down into your steaming coffee mug.

He brought his up to his mouth for a sip and stared you down over it. “Do you happen to know where—"

Your phone buzzed in your back pocket and you pulled it out automatically.

“Hey, doll, where did you run off to?” Your heartbeat quickened and you smirked despite yourself. You didn’t need to look up at the sender to know who it was from.

“Know where what,” you offered with no doubt a dazed look in your eyes.

You were definitely going to need a therapist after this job was through.

[immentallyilll]

Prevent the war - part 2

here´s the first part

-this is more of the reader trying to understand Aemonds feeling towards her (did he hate her, love her), also Alicent and reader had a great relationship, before the eye accident and after-

Pairing: Yandere Aemond Targaryen x reader Targaryen 

Trigger Warning: Yandere Aemond, choking (slight), threatening, some spicey talk, dirty talking

“Sīr, kessa ao dīnagon nyke?(So, will you marry me?)” he asked with sweet voice, as if he was your secret lover for years and now, he asked for your hand somewhere in a beautiful garden. “Skoros iderennon gaomagon eman.(What choice do i have)” you replied, looking upon his sapphire eye. Aemond seemed pleased with your answer since his firm grip was now gone and turned into a soft crease of your cheek, that felt loving and beautiful.

The two of you have not moved an inch and Bantis was resting waiting for any. You could only stare at him. A madman who threatened to put out your eye, who showed you what fear really means, happens to be your betrothed. You feared what is coming next, who will sit on the throne now, what are your mother and brothers think, what is going to happen to you and Bantis? Why did Aemond ask you to marry him, you did not believe he did it in intention to prevent the war. And finally, did you have any other choice? There were too many questions and no answers, in such a little moment you became frustrated. You had to understand what he intended.

"Skoro syt?(why)"you asked, worry and anger pronounced in your voice. Aemond lowered his eyes to your gaze, nostrils widened in irritation. "Skoros gaomagon ao nūmāzma, skoro syt?(what do you mean, why?)" he practically spat. "Why in seven hells did you ask me to marry you?" you questioned, almost yelled. Aemond put his hand on the back of your neck, titling your head to look up at him and you immediately put your hands on his chest to push him away. A small grin appeared on his face, "Why do you think i did? Hmm, tell me," Aemond told you in playful voice. "Aemond i do not have time for this." you announced, and he lifted his eyebrow in questioning manner. "Why the hurry? Are you going somewhere?" he asked, "Because i am not letting you go anywhere." as he said that his hand became tighter, making his point clear. "Then tell me for fucks sake, why, why did you do this. You threatened to take my eye, you almost killed me with Vhaegar and now you are asking me to marry you." not understanding his action, desperately seeking explanation. Aemond stared down at you, rage filled his words, "I can still take your eye if that bothers you, but first of all, you have already said you will marry me. So why don´t we sit on a dragon and fly to Kings Landing, we can talk there." he snarled at you. Aemond let go of your neck and took your hand. He began to move but you stood, not moving a muscle, this is not what you wanted.

"No. I did not say that i WILL marry you, i asked what CHOICE DO I HAVE." you shouted furiously and snatched your arm, Aemond was a bit shocked. " NONE! You do not have a choice, you WILL marry me, even if you don´t like it now. I will DRAG YOU to Kings Landing if i have to. Nothing can help you now, what is so hard to understand about that?!" Aemond argued back. "What is so hard to understand? EVERITHING, you lunatic! I doubt you did this to prevent the war, you almost killed me and now you expect me to be your wife. How did you even come to believe that I could agree with such a thing?" you laughed at the situation. "I did it because i wanted to. I did it because you are meant to be mine!" Aemond clarified some of his actions, with irritated and arrogant undertone in his voice. Still, you were stunned by his words, well you knew he liked you and you liked him too at a young age, but enough for a marriage? Maybe you have underestimated his feelings.

"Now are done with the quizzing?" he impatiently asked, with furious look on his face. Stunned by his word from earlier and still processing what he told you. Aemond groaned and pulled at your arm once again, to get you moving. You stopped, again, Aemond turned his head to face you. He was about to say something probably arrogant and sneery, but you were faster. "How are you planning to get to Kings Landing?" you asked, he narrowed his eyes in irritation, "because there is no way we are flying on Vhaegar." you added with worry in your voice. "We´ll fly on your dragon, to make sure she won´t try anything and Vhaegar will follow us. "You think Bantis will let you?" you asked, but you have to admit that you did enjoy teasing him and putting his patience in a test, it was highly amusing to you.

"I ´m done with you and your questioning" Aemond said, annoyed. To be clear you actually expected him to hit you but instead he turned his body to you. At tremendous speed he crouched down so his shoulder was at the height of your abdomen and threw you over it. With a yelp you squirmed on his shoulder, his hand securing your knees"No, stop." you yelped, as he began to walk toward Bantis. "Gīda ilagon Bantis!(calm down Bantis!)" he talked to her to make sure she will not defy him "put me down" you cried out because of embarrassment. You were squirming on his shoulder all the way to the dragon. Aemond brought a slap to your ass, with words "Thats enough!" and slid you off, onto the ground. His hold on your wrist was harsh, to prevent you from getting away and you were more than sure it will leave a mark.

Aemond climbed on Bantis and dragged you behind him, but you struggled, because why would you make it easier for both of you when you can annoy him more. Your dragon did not growl or roar at Aemond, she was a calmer dragon by nature, even though she would do anything to protect you it seems that Aemonds words have made an impact on her. Your saddle has two spots for sitting, because usually you rode with Rhaena, since she had no dragon and the two of you were like true sisters. (Baela always felt the same and she liked the fact of you giving Rhaena a chance to ride a dragon) Aemond seemed quite upset about it, due to the fact that he planned on keeping you in his lap.

He sat you into seat in the front, by pushing on your shoulders, he yanked on your hair for you to look up at him, "Sit still and don´t test me." he ordered you as he sat behind you. Not that he cared about your personal space, since Aemonds body was absolutely glued to your back. You could feel his hot breath on the nape of your neck and his rock hard cock against your lower back. Was he getting turned on by this? Were you as well? The question was forced by the aroused shiver you got when you felt his shaft twitch. Aemond groaned and got hold of the reins and you gripped the handles. "Sōvegon naejot se dārys tegorīr!(Fly to the Kings Landing!") he commanded Bantis and she began to spread her wings. He turned to Vhaegar, "Vhaegar gaomagon bē( Vhaegar keep up!") she was quite far from you but due to her size she had no problem hearing his words. As Bantis shot into the air, Vhaegar did not hesitate and followed her.

The two dragons flew through the sky on their way to kings landing, the flight was no longer than a few hours. (I´m way too lazy to write about the flight because there won't even happen anything so...fuck it i guess.)

As you landed on Bantis with Aemond behind you, the guards were little more than confused about the situation but did not dare to question the prince. Aemond stood up first and then offered you a hand, which you ignored and got off by yourself. Aemond just stood there on Bantis, looking down at you, waiting for him with a smile. He huffed and slid off the dragon. Walking towards you with large steps and a smirk on his face. You expected him to be pissed off by your action, so you decided to push him a little more, why not you are already dead, here with the greens, about to become Aemonds wife, what worse could happen? You began to walk without him when he came to you, he threw his hand around your waist but not in a gentle way, no he gripped your hip so harshly, you could feel his fingertips digging into your skin through the clothing. " You do that again and i will throw you on the ground right here, in front of the guards, pull your pants down, force you to suck my cock, then i´ll put it into the virgin cunt of yours and fuck you until you forget you name. Is that clear?" Aemond growled quietly, with his lips pressed against your ear. You stared at him, while he still waited for your answer, but you did not realize that yet.

Aemond hummed, "Alright then," and put his other hand on your arm, as if he was going to do it. You quickly uttered from yourself " Y-yes it´s clear, it´s clear!" Fear in your eyes made Aemonds cock even harder at which he thought if it´s even possible. After hours of being pushed against you plump and beautiful ass. He let go of your arm and you sighed in relief. "Good." he said and creased your hip as if nothing happened. You were scared for your life but something in the way Aemond said with calm voice made you aroused, imagining he actually did it, caused your nipples to get hard and your clit to ache so much that it hurt. the realization has finnaly hit you and pulled you to reality, you were mentally beating yourself up to get aroused by Aemonds imaginantions of forcing you to fuck him.

You walked from outside into the castle and through its many corridors. The two of you got into the council room, there was Alicent impatiently waiting for her son's arrival, along with Aegon, Otto and of course ser Criston Cole. You stood straight, chin up, as your mother taught you, newer show your fear to the enemy. Alicent was in disbelief of what she saw, you at Aemond's side. "Aemond, gods, what is the meaning of this?" she asked while looking at you, in worry, then skipping to Aemond in worry as well but also concern. "I came to the conclusion that even the predominance of an alliance will not help stop the upcoming war." he made a pause, and you saw the anxiety in her face, she barely breathed, waiting for her son to finish, what sounded as a death sentence. "But the union of the house could. I wish to marry Y/n Velaryon in the sake of our house." he proclaimed Aemond. Alicent exhaled in relief. You were shocked of how well he presented and objected his actions. He was good at this, you thought.

She came to you and Aemond brought his hands to hers in a comforting gesture. Alicent sighed and cupped his cheek which made your heart ache for your mother. Your gaze was on the ground once again, she´s probably worrying where you are, if you´re alright, or if you are even alive. "I... I wish to speak with princess alone." she said, clearing her throat. That made you look up. Otto with Aemond were the first walking away, then Aemond. he did not look at you which you were thankful for. Ser Crispin Criston stayed at the door as a guard. "Come, child we will tak a bit." Alicent told you and gestured you to sit in the medieval cushion chair, and she sat on the one on the opposite. "I understand that you are confused and frightened right now, but i promise you, nothing is going to harm you. I understand it is hard to be told, you have to marry someone but i assure you Aemond is going to make a great husband." she gave you a warm smile and held your hands. "I hope he did not ... cause you any troubles." she said sighting, while looking at your neck that was red, turning slight purple, from the grip he held. " I´ll send the handmaiden to prepare you a bath and new dress." she told you, "Thank you, your grace." you said, "Is there anything you need?" she asked, and you immediately replied, " I would like to send a letter to my mother, the queen,"you didn't forgive yourself to emphasize the word queen, at first, she was little unsure to approve, her face spoke with it, so you suppressed her motherly feelings, "She must be afraid, and so must my brothers, I just want to assure her that I am alive and well." with teary eyes, you grabbed her hands in pleading manner. It worked, "Alright my dear, i only have one request in exchange," as if you did not expect anything else, "you´ll share bedroom with Aemond from now till your wedding, then there will be everything else discussed." you took a deep breath and nodded, yes. she stood up and turned her attention to Ser Criston, "Ser Criston please, escort princess y/n to their bedroom and send prince Aemond to me." Alicent ordered and he responded. "At once, your grace." You stood up from your seat, proud of yourself, and followed him.

Once you reached Aemond´s chambers and Ser Criston acknowledged him with the news. He was looking at you the whole time, with delight. you slipped past each other, he closed the door behind him, leaving you alone in the king-sized room. You looked around the space, many books about the history of Westeros, philosophy and Valyrian tongue. After a moment of wandering a knock distributed you, and you went to open the door, there was a maiden whit a few things in her hands, you let her in, and she began to prepare the bath. After a while she told you the bath was ready, you striped, and she took the clothes and hurried away, to let you enjoy your bath. The water was almost boiling hot but to your liking, she filled it with a floral scents and fine spices, the mixture smelled amazing. You damped your hair into the water, you cleared your mind from all thoughts, loving the quiet. Only to be interrupted by the door opening, you rapidly turned your head to source of the sound, bringing knees to your chest.

And there he was, Aemond, leaning against the wall, staring at your wet body, in his bathtub. he wandered to his bed, "I hope i did not interrupt you, my dearest" he said but you barely paid attention to him. Now he started to take off the layers from his upper body and then his pants "I do think it will be in place for me to join you" he said as he walked to you in the bath. Now your attention was drawn on him again,"Wha-" but you did not realize he was fully naked and the first thing you saw was his cock, again hard, standing in it´s pride. You turned red and looked away, at which he laughed as he stepped into the bath. Aemond sat into the water, smirking, "Aww, shy again? Don´t be." he said in calm voice, "Come here, darling" Aemond said as he looked at you and then at his lap, gesturing you to sit there.

-hah you can wait for another part

i know i promised a wedding ceremony but this is better (don't worry the ceremony will appear)

uuuuu i obsessed with this, happy reading... bye bye

[pendragaryen]

The 100 rewatch 2023 S1 E5

Episode “Twilight’s last gleaming”

Post-coital Clarke and Finn having a chat surrounded by ridiculously cheesy candlelight. They obviously have found a valve to let go of their stress, despair and anger. They’ve calmed down. Clarke, also very obviously, fell hard for Finn “I wanted it to be you.” Ouff.. Like i said, this will hurt.

The ark: Imprisoned Abby is visited by chancellor Jaha. The oxygen supply will run off way earlier than they (and Jake Griffin) have expected. The culling of 320 people is already decided by the council - without Abby. She’s shook and angry. It’s THE MURDER of 320 innocent people! She still holds desperately onto her hope to hear from Raven, so that it could be prevented. Abby is pardoned for now. She has to treat people who are suffering from the reduced oxygen supply.

And there’s our queen Raven on her way down to earth in that escape pod. That thing is bearly surviving the entering into the atmosphere. I am holding my breath...

Finn and Clarke still not done with their cheesy chit chat. They’re out of the bunker now, sitting together under the nights sky, when Clarke suddenly notices Raven’s escape pod falling towards the ground, which Finn falsly thought of as a shooting star.

Lol, Bellamy and his glorious threesome. Good for him. Octavias shouts are wakening up the whole camp and he’s out of his tent half naked within seconds. O’s also noticed the thing that’s falling down to earth from the sky. Since it’s NOT a shooting star (oh Finn...), they immediately assume it must be sent down from the ark. Everyone is excited! But Bellamy tells everyone to stay back in camp until the morning “bc it’s not save” out there in the night. O insists, but he refuses. He’s tense - and we all know why. When the arkers come down, nothing would save him from being punished for shooting the chancellor... He has to go to where the pod came down alone and he will have to be there FIRST, if he wants to prevent that... Selfserving ass? Yes? Yes... Aw man...

The ark: Tor Lemkin and his little daughter Reese are visiting doctor Griffin. The child can’t see anything with her right eye. She’s going to be blind in a forseeable future as a result of the constantly reduced oxygen supply... Abby’s upset and desperate to be unable to cure it. Is there still hope? Is Raven still alive?

We see Raven on the ground now. The pod is damaged and she’s unconscious and bleeding. Oh god... Raven, please be alive! So many people are counting on you!

Finn and Clarke are back in the dropship camp and find Bellamy gone off alone into the woods to search for the pod. They’re immediately preparing themselves to follow him. Clarke’s got a certain suspicion. Bellamy was always so eager to make sure that the arkers think that no-one of the 100 is still alive - so that they have to assume that the earth is still uninhabitable and don’t come down. Clarke blames herself to let herself being so easily distracted - by Finn, that’s clear. She doesn’t say it. But even FInn himself knows what she meant. You can see it in his face for a brief second. He still follows her as she’s off into the woods after Bell.

O has followed Bellamy too. She finds and confronts him, calls him a liar. She’s clearly upset that he wanted to go alone to the pod just to get himself whatever is in it. But he had his reasons to lie to her. “I did this for you, to protect you.” He now admits that he shot the chancellor back on the ark just to get imprisoned and to be able to follow O down to earth. We see Octavia’s face fall. She can’t believe it! Bell’s telling her about a deal he took to get a place on the dropship. “Do this, kill him, and they get me on the dropship - and i did it.” Aw man...You can clearly see how the truth pains him, how it tortures him what he did. But he stands by it. He HAD to do it to protect what’s most precious to him. O’s dumbfounded and completely shocked. “You shot the chancellor?!” - “He floated our mother! He locked you up! He deserved it” -  well, i understand where you’re coming from, honey, but THAT is some avengeful shit coming out of your beautiful mouth there, jesus... O’s apalled “I didn’t ask you to do that!” - “You’re right.” Bellamy steps back a little, his face growing cold and determined now. “I made the choice. This is on me.” And that’s why he has to handle whatever came down with the pod all by himself and alone.

The ark: Kane and Jaha talking. And Jaha’s bringing me at the verge of real tears here. He’s willing to share the fate of those who had be chosen to be killed in the culling for the sake of the others. And he’s also willing to give up his job as the chancellor and to pass it onto Kane. Who would have thought? Kane wants to hold him back, but to no avail. Jaha sees “strength” in Kane - something, that is referred to again later in the show and we as audience still have to find out.

On earth Bell’s found the wrecked escape pod - with the still unconscious and clearly injured Raven in it.  And instead of helping her or at least checking on her vital signs, he has the audacity to steal the radio from the pod. He’s throwing it into a nearby river. WHAT?! NO, BELL, NO GODDAMNIT!! This is basically the death sentence for the people on the ark! WTF! He can’t possibly know this. But still. NO! Saving his own skin is clearly the only thing that he’s caring about atm. But honestly, what exactly would WE do in his place? I have no idea. Running away maybe...

Raven’s alive! Thank goodness. Clarke’s right in time to greet her and to witness Ravens first steps on the ground. Raven’s in awe about the nature, the air and the soft rain that’s falling. You can almost feel with her. It’s a beautiful, peaceful little moment. Clarke smiles. But then... Raven’s seeing Finn. And everything changes. Raven rushes into his arms. Finn is clearly very surprised to see her. But Raven’s just relieved and so happy to see him - and then she kisses him. And he kisses her back. We see Clarke’s smile fading away, her whole expression falls. See? I told you that it would hurt... I wanna hug her.. Obviously Finn and Raven are a thing - or at least, they had been on the ark.  - Clarke’s face is completely expressionless now. Finn comes over, he tries to apologize, but she’s tense and turns him down. She seems almost relieved to have something more important to do now: Treating Raven’s wounds.

Raven’s telling them that Clarke’s mum had the initial idea to come down to the ground, so that the ark could be informed that the 100 are still alive and earth is inhabitable. She’s also telling them about the planned culling, since the oxygen supply runs off quickly now. They have to send word to the ark RIGHT NOW! But when they’re searching for the radio in the pod, they found it gone. Stolen. And Clarke has a very certain idea who did it. She’s very angry - and off to search for Bellamy immediately.

On the ark Abby confronts Jaha.  All of the decisions were made too fast. She proposes some alternatives they still could try - but Jaha turns her down, telling her that the culling is “the only solution”. When she goes she appeals to his conscience: “What would you tell Wells?” - Jaha’s pensive now. But he doesn’t step back from his decision.

Abby’s off to get that old video from Jake which he made to inform the people of the ark about the failing survival systems - that same video Jake had given his life for. She’s determined to send it, to make it public now by herself. You go, Abby!

On the ground, O’s running through the woods. Is she being hunted? She falls down a hill and loses consciousness. (??? That’s so... off the storyline right now. But well...)

Meanwhile Clarke finds Bellamy and immediately asks him about the radio. “Hey, princess, taking a walk in the woods?” he teases mockingly. Now he’s back at being a selfassured ass, i see. Sigh. Clarke’s informing him, that if they don’t radio to the ark that they’re still alive and earth still inhabitable, basically 300 people would be killed up there to save oxygen. You can clearly see that this is catching him on the wrong foot. Clarke basically stakes him with her index finger, pushes him. “And it’ll be YOUR people! Working people!” People from his own station? He’s clearly shocked, but he tries to hide it. Then Raven arrives, she’s recognizing his name. They were looking for him on the ark bc he shot down the chancellor... Finn and Clarke both look at him in shock. Clarke’s connecting the dots quickly: “THAT’S why you took the wristbands!” Finn brings it on point “All that “Whatever the hell we want!” and you’re just caring about saving your own skin!”

Bellamy is cornered now. He even attacks Raven - who provoked him, but... ouch... CALM DOWN YOU TWO! Clarke’s going in between and stops them. Bellamy scoffs and turns his back on them. “Jaha deserved  to die. You all know that.” But suddenly Raven’s saying, that Jaha isn’t dead. Bell turns around, dumbfounded. He’s clearly surprised. “What?!” “You’re a lousy shot” Raven mocks him. But he doesn‘t really listen. You can see the relief in Bellamy’s eyes now though he still can’t believe it properly, and Clarke immediately catches on it. “Don‘t you know what this means? You’re NOT a murderer! You always did what you had to do to protect your sister. THAT’S who you are!” She’s seeing right through him. In fact, she always did. SInce the very first day on the ground, when she came for him bc of his gun. It’s as if she could sense the sensitive and caring heart he’s wearing underneath all his asshole attitude and hardness. And Bellamy is so baffled, that he can’t even reply. Why does she even care about him that much? Why? He can’t help staring into her wide, blue, pleading eyes. She’s intense, urgent, stares right back, tries to bring up this “good and protective side” within him: “And you can do it again! By protecting 300 of your people! Where’s the radio?” We can see that she reaches him. But now he averts his eyes. “It’s too late...”

On the ark Abby managed to publish Jake’s video. Everyone listens. Kane and his men are coming to arrest her. Again. But her message is sent now. And every citizen of the ark knows.

On earth the delinquents search the river for the radio. They’re finding it, but it’s damaged. “Like i said. It’s too late.” Bellamy. WIth his arms crossed. Clarke jumps into his face “Do you have ANY idea what you did? DO YOU EVEN CARE?” - “You asked me to help. I helped.” He answers stoically. He’s shut himself up to her and the others again. “300 people are gonna die today because of you!” Clarke screams. But suddenly smartass Raven has another idea to “contact” the ark...

On the ark they’re accusing Abby to have made everything even worse by publishing the video. But look! The people of the ark have come to volunteer, willing to give their lifes freely to save the other inhabitants - especially their children. Tor Lemkin is the first to volunteer. He’s doing it for his little daughter. It’s heartbreaking. And there are more and more people coming in to volunteer. Oh god... this is really heartwrenching. Jaha is clearly surprised. “Jake was right. It brings out the best in us.” Imma cry...

On earth Raven’s working on the wrecked escape pod. She’s removing parts from the device. She tries to chat with Clarke - who clearly holds her distance and answers evasively. Raven is suspicious why, but she’s not digging any deeper.

On the ark the final list for the culling stands. Jaha still wants to resign as chancellor. He executed Jake Griffin, his own best friend, whose message now helped them all to find a solution together. He clearly can’t bear that thought.

Meanwhile litte Reese and her dad are saying goodbye. The child has no idea that she won’t see her dad ever again. Kill me. That’d hurt less. Honestly. Wtf, i want to quit. Tor’s expression when he watches his daughter go tears my heart apart. I shit you not.

It’s night again on the ground. The kids are creating some kind of launch pads for firework rockets that they’re supposed to send up into the nights sky. So THAT’S what Raven meant by “We just have to let them know, that we’re here.” Great idea!

But on the ark the culling is about to start. Kane’s showing his heart for the first time “We can’t affort any more people.” If Raven should send a signal, he would call it off immediately. Abby looks at him, a little surprised maybe. She’s thankful. And there are the volunteers entering section 16...

Parallel to that we see the kinds getting the firework ready. But it’s too late... When we see the rockets start into the sky, their lights illuminate the kids faces on earth. But the people in section 16 on the ark are dying already. And we as audience are forced to watch this, helplessly. Look... Tor Lemkin has the hair pin of his daughter in his hand until the very last breath leaves his body... He’s gone now. Like all the others. And i remember myself crying like a child when i watched this for the first time. This is so incredibly sad and SO UNNECESSARY! My heart aches. Seeing that pile of boots at the door of the locked room doesn’t make me feel any better tbh. Geez, am i crying again? Yes. Yes i do. Shit...

When Abby and the others enter the room to check on the people (so many dead people...), she finds that particular hair pin on the ground. And now... i’m BAWLING. Thanks... Little Reese has lost her father. And it was all for nothing. I cannot...

On earth the 100 witness the fireworks exploding in the sky. “Can you wish on this kind of a shooting star?” Clarke muses. Bell sounds lost. He looks at her. “I wouldn’t even know what to wish for.” But he’s curious. “What about you?” Clarke sees Raven in Finns arms. It clearly hurts her. But Raven smiles at her, so full of hope - so oblivious. It hurts her even more. But she smiles back. Strong girl.

Now we see Octavia at the foot of the hill where she fell unconscious before. (Did she lie there ALL THAT TIME? omg.. And why isn’t Bellamy worried already? She’s missing isn’t she? lol... this doesn’t make much sense but ok...) And when she awakes now, she sees a dark, tall stranger towering over her. (Lincoln! Yeay!) She stares.

On the ark, Abby and Jaha talking about forgiveness, one of the main themes of the whole show, in Clarke’s former prison cell. You can see her drawings on the walls EVERYWHERE. “We make the best choices that we can. And hope that there’s a forgiving god.” Jaha says. (That’s not the last time that we will hear those words!) Both, Abby and Jaha are looking out of the window down to earth far below them. “If we deserve to be forgiven.” Abby’s answer is another quote that’s recurring throughout the whole series. And now they’re seeing it down on the earth: The signal lights, the fireworks from the kids! They almost can’t believe it! The 100 are alive!!! It may be too late for Tor Lemkin and the others... but suddenly... there’s hope again for the rest of them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Another breathtaking, exciting, unnerving and intriguing episode which kept me on the edge on my seat. Especially in the end and especially while watching it for the first time. I will never forget. I was... shook to the core. Almost every episode has something like that now, a situation that completely WRECKS me.

And yes, of course, It’s Bellamy’s fault. If he hadn’t stolen the radio the 100 would’ve send a signal up to the ark way earlier - and the culling most likely wouldn’t have happen at all. That is hard. And i’m SURE it must be a very heavy burden to bear for Bellamy, who’s well aware of what he had (most likely) done. Therefore his almost hopeless answer for Clarke in the end. “I wouldn’t even know what to wish for.” It’s over for him. And he knows it. At some point, the arkers WILL come down to earth now that they’ve seen their signal lights. And then he will have to stand up for what he had done. At least, he isn‘t a murderer like he thought he was. But an attempted murder wouldn’t go unpunished either. He - they all - can’t know if the culling happened or not. They could only hope that their signal reaches them right in time to stop it. But if not.. I feel with Bellamy. Yes he made mistakes. Yes he made them on purpose. But that doesn’t mean he hadn’t learned from them and can be a better man now. He’s punished enough by all the guilt he has to bear now. This is what he did to himself. He only wanted to protect his sister, do be with her at all costs. And he had a very weak moment when he let his fear win over his mind and stole that damn radio. He didn’t want to face the consequences for himself. He didn’t (he COULDN’T) know that other lives would’ve been on stake... I’m SURE if he had known this before, he wouldn’t even have done this in the first place. He would’ve run away at some point maybe, before the arkers would come down. But he wouldn’t have stolen that radio. I am SURE.

What i liked: Ravens frist steps on earth. Jake Griffins video motivating the arkers.

What i disliked: The culling of course. Tor Lemkin saying goodbye to his daughter. Bellamy Blake stealing that damn radio. WTF!

Fave quote(s): “We make the best choices that we can. And hope that there’s a forgiving god.” - “You always did what you have to do to protect your sister. That’s who you are!”

Song(s)  i associate with the episode:  “World gone mad” by Bastille - “So this is where we are, it′s not where we had wanted to be. If half the world's gone mad, the other half just don′t care, you see. - When it feels like the world's gone mad and there′s nothing you can do about it, no, there′s nothing you can do about it..."

[anipgarden]

For the homies who haven't followed for a long time, why the quest for swampweed milkweek seeds?

So I’m currently at the library so if this answer is lame I may go into more detail once I get home but the long and the short of it is Swamp Milkweed Pretty Pink Color. Long version below.

Summer ~2015 (I think): volunteering at the zoo, making and selling seed bombs to raise money for conservation projects. Some Karen sasses at me for encouraging people to make butterfly gardens/plant butterfly friendly plants (??????) and basically says ‘You probably don’t even so how dare you imply I, a mother of 3, should.’ I take that as a challenge.

Fall and Winter 2015: start collecting seeds and stuff from whatever stores sold them cheap for a butterfly garden. Start learning about how important milkweed is for monarchs. Goal to obtain Any Milkweed is a go.

Spring 2016ish (I think): I find milkweed for sale at garden stores! This is Tropical Milkweed (Asclepias curassavica), and most of it is red and orange. While googling I find a Really Nice All Yellow Variety and my goal becomes Obtaining Yellow Milkweed.

Spring 2017ish: obtain yellow milkweed. At this point I have like 7ish tropical milkweed plants in my garden.

Spring either 2019 and 2020: at this point I have been growing milkweed and other flowers pollinators like for awhile when I learn that UH OH. Tropical Milkweed is invasive in my area! And I really shouldn’t be growing it! (One could argue the greenhouses in my area shouldn’t be selling it in the first place and I’d agree but I digress.) In my quest to figure out what species of milkweed ARENT invasive in my state—native, even—I find swamp milkweed and its the prettiest plant I’ve ever seen. Fuck yellow tropical milkweed, this plant is BRIGHT bright pink, beloved by caterpillars, beloved by pollinators, and smells like VANILLA? I want it now.

Thus begins the quest to grow it (and other species but mostly swamp milkweed) from seed. It never works out.

Spring 2020: accidentally steps on seedlings. Fatality.

Spring 2021: seeds were cold stratifying in the fridge but were left out of the fridge too long, sprouted in the bag for three days, and were weak as hell when I finally put them in. Forgot to water. Fatality.

Spring 2022: seeds are left in cups for way too long, forgot to water because Senior Project, cold stratification of next batch doesnt go well. Fatality.

Spring 2023: seeds mold while cold stratifying, germination rate is ‘one out of 21’ and then that one dies because I forget to water. Fatality.

During that whole while I’m thinking to myself ‘ok I suck at growing these from seed maybe they sell them in greenhouses and plant stores?’ And no they don’t. Until earlier this year when I finally find them being sold at native plant festivals (wherein which I arrive too late to my town’s once-yearly native plant festival and they’re sold out of milkweeds before the 30 minute mark of a 5 hour event YES I’m still mad about that) and other gardening festivals (shout out to the lady selling swamp milkweed at the zoo’s garden festival AND the honeybee festival) and ONE garden store near my friend’s house by the beach called Earthworks.

There are other milkweeds I am questing after now because there’s like 21-22 native milkweeds in Florida and my goal is to grow as many different varieties as possible (which is HARD because NO ONE SELLS THEM except for at this once a year plant sale and they don’t have enough to last THIRTY MINUTES YES IM STILL MAD). Currently I’ve also got my eyes set on sandhill milkweed (Asclepias humistrata) and Redring milkweed (whos latin name I don’t remember right now). Also trying to figure out why pictures of swamp milkweed are Bright Ass Vibrant Pink but all the ones I’ve gotten and that my garden server has are pale ass strawberry milk pink but yknow.

Since I’m trying to start a career in animation I’ll likely end up moving to Southern California sooner or later, and all my knowledge about swamp milkweed will be Fucking Useless. But worry not! I have another milkweed to obsess over that grows in Cali! Heartleaf Milkweed (which might be Asclepias cordifolia but I could be remembering that wrong) is GORGEOUS and it has the growth habit like Sandhill in a sense but the flowers are droopy and VELVETY PURPLE and the leaves are HEART SHAPED (kinda) so yknow. Vibes.

Anyways yeah thems the brakes pal.

[saveourskinship]

Thankathankathank youuuuu @akorah for the tag 🥰

Three Ships:

Dramione. Because kissing someone furiously while grumpily saying "You. It's you. It's always you but... Why does it have to be you" is my jam, bread, butter, marmalade and vegemite [marmite if you're heathen ie smutty]

Zutara. Because they make each other better. They move each other forward. Because fire. Because water. Because lightning. Because ice. Because scars. Because healing. Because because because.

Skam and Beadie. This is cheating because they are original characters I am writing. They are not even a couple but God help me am I the hell leaving space to write my own fanfiction about them. Maybe an HEA where they don't all die at the end. *shrugs*

First Ship:

In anything: Barbie and Action Man. Before I was even in school my sister and I would steal our brother's Action Man as Barbie's partner. Ken's job was Beach. Our Barbie needed a man with a plan.

In media: Sora/Kairi from Kingdom Hearts. I used to devour fanfic about them. Shout out to the one which sticks in my brain and introduced me to My Chemical Romance when Kairi got married to Squall because of something to do with Mickey being an little shitprick which I think was because of some soul signature nonsense? I can't remember and anyway Demolition Lovers was their wedding song and the bane of my mother's existence - Save's Emo Phase was born.

Last Song:

Girls Like You - The Naked and Famous (shit, this is actually a lie, but it's the last 'proper' song I listened to since I don't count the demo I'm making for my friend's satire girlpunk band she decided to create last night as a real song yet. It just has boop-boop-boops. Night Lunch can pull off songs with only doof-doofs and boom-booms. I cannot. So the demo won't be real until Sasha does the drums at least.)

Last Movie:

What A Girl Wants. Look. It's Amanda Bynes. I love Amanda Bynes. It is also Colin Firth and blue blood upper crust English vibes (done poorly, sure, but still). The last chapter of rose-petal compliments is needing all the help I can get it right now.

Currently Reading:

Harrow the Ninth - Tamsyn Muir

Lesbian necromancers in space. Need there be another reason?

Currently Watching:

Jujitsu Kaisen Season Two (Gojo, my love. I salivate, I wither, I breathe so much ecstasy I lack oxygen and die.)

Taskmaster NZ (rewatch. Like, no shade to my country or anything [said under the world's largest umbrella] but fuck we're shit.)

Last Thing I Wrote:

Like, as in finished? Because otherwise it would be this, right?

I wrote delivery instructions for a food order earlier today. Can't have done it very well because the driver still got confused and had to call me.

In terms of Things with Titles that are Complete™️, then an original folktale called.... fuck, what did I call it? I can't remember. It's about an unnamed protagonist and a boatman though. Still waiting on my rejection emails from the magazines I've submitted it to 😂

Currently Writing:

Let's skip over the arseholiness of me saying that I'm currently writing this again, shall we? (Let's not turtles-all-the-way-down my mentioning it either.)

Okay. Here we go:-

rose-petal compliments: dramione. Quiet luxury, Hermione is wealthy. Set in the Muggle world.

sacreligious inferences of a midnight paradise: dramione. Trope soup. Marriage law/fake dating/date or die. (Plus a bunch more tropes because why not?)

The Absolute and Total Defeat of One Draco Malfoy. Multi-ship. Crack. Crack from crest to cunt.

What's Owed When. Dramione. Unexpected Pregnancy. France. Delectomancy. Draco pines so hard he's basically a forest.

foil&fall. Tansy (Teddy Lupin/Pansy Parkinson). Fluff. Epistolary.

Untitled warfic. Dramione. My attempt at All Plot, No Vibes. Yes, you read that right. I'm trying to write something with NO VIBES ALL PLOT. (Draw a pentagram and sage for me, I bloody need it.)

The Environmental Suicide Club. Original YA speculative fiction. This is the one Skam and Beadie are from. Grief. Environmentalism. Nihilism. Set one generation in the future. Everyone dies at the end. A Fun, Very Good Time! Completely unmarketable! Wheeee!

Untitled socmed. Theomione. Writing this one with @they-call-me-megs A bunch of fun and one we return to when we're struggling for inspiration elsewhere.

Aster, the Star-Sailor. Original children's series. Sci-fi, pirate adventure. Came from writing the Tansy and I fell in love with it. Thanks, Pansy.

Fate and Free Will series. Urban fantasy six-book series. Currently undertaking a massive rework of the structure.

wander/wonder. A Luna Lovegood POV story Christmas visual novel. Story is written and am hoping I can finish the video in time for December.

There are a few more but these are the ones I work on a least a little bit every week.

Tagging @they-call-me-megs @thusatlas @paandreablack

[hangmans-darling]

Live Forever [Part 5] Jake Seresin

summary: Jake Seresin and Magnolia James have always been tied together, soon enough their ties become entangled over the years. This is their love story.

word count: 3.7k

warnings: none

masterlist

live forever masterlist

Feedback is always welcome! Enjoy!🥰

“You told me Saturday would be the last time you’d cancel!” Nola exclaims as Johnny is pulling on his jacket. 

“I can’t just say no to my Captain, Lia,” he sighs in exasperation.

“But it’s okay to say no to me repeatedly?” 

“You know I don’t have a choice. I’m hoping this will be the last meeting and then I can tell you–”

“Why can’t you tell me now? Are you going to keep things like this hidden from me when I’m your wife?”

That catches him off guard and he sighs. He takes her hands in his and stares into her eyes. 

“I didn’t want to tell you until it was official and the paperwork had started but…the reason I’ve been leaving for these meetings is because I’m going to be promoted to Lieutenant Commander.”

“What?! Johnny, that’s incredible!” she jumps into his arms squeezing him tight, he chuckles into her hair.

“Thanks, baby. I didn’t want to tell you in case it didn’t happen but all of these meetings have been for paperwork and interviews. But it’s officially happening now.”

“I’m so proud of you,” she says and gives him a hard kiss. 

“There’ll be a ceremony and a dinner to follow in a couple of weeks.”

“Am I allowed to come?” she scratches at the buzzed part of his neck. 

“Of course, I need to show off my beautiful bride to be,” he smiles and gives her another kiss. “And afterwards, you’re allowed to come as many times as you want when I’m buried deep inside you.” 

Nola shivered at his words, his hand squeezed her ass as they kissed feverishly. Johnny was the one to pull away first because he couldn’t be late to this meeting. 

“Wait up for me if you’re home before I am,” he tells her and kisses her cheek one last time. 

***

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you hung out with Jake alone, twice!” Layla nearly shouts when they meet for brunch on Monday. Nola had an inservice day that ended earlier than planned so she called Layla up. 

“It all happened so fast!”

“So tell me everything! What does he look like? Do you hate his guts? Has he tried anything?”

“Slow down!” Nola laughs and the waiter brings over their mimosas. “He looks the same, but older you know? Still handsome as a devil. I do not hate his guts and no he hasn’t tried anything.”

“What does Johnny think of him?”

“He hasn’t met him yet…”

“What?! Why not?” 

“He’s been going to a lot of meetings when Jake and I have made plans and–”

“He’s fine with you hanging out with your ex lover?” 

“Seems to be,” Nola shrugs glazing over the menu. She notices Layla staring at her blankly. “Nothing is going to happen, Layla. Relax.” 

“Just be careful, Nola. You and I both know how you get with Jake.”

“It’s been nine years since we were anything.” 

 “Yes, but you still have that same look in your eye as you did nine years ago. Just be careful, okay?”

“You have nothing to worry about.”

Later that night, Nomi calls Nola.

“I heard from Juniper who heard from her mom who was told by Jake that you two are together again?!” 

“What? No, that’s not even remotely accurate, Nomi. We’ve been hanging out, that’s all.”

“How did that happen exactly?”

“He was at my open house a few weeks ago because his niece is in my class. And his niece is Javy Machado’s daughter, remember him? It was totally happenstance and I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that he and I are around each other again.”

“And there’s nothing going on between you two?”

“No,” Nola stresses. “Why do people keep asking that?”

“Maybe because everyone and their mother thought you two would get married but then he was a dick and broke up with you twice.”

“Hey, language,” Nola scolds. 

“I”m twenty years old, No-no and dick isn’t a curse word anyway. What’s it like being around him again?” 

“Weird since it’s been so long but also the same since we know each other so well. But nothing is happening, okay?”

“Okay, okay. As long as you’re not upset at seeing him then I’m happy he’s back in your life.”

***

On a Friday afternoon during lunch, she receives a text from Jake asking if she and Johnny would like to join him and his crew for a few drinks at The Hard Deck. Johnny says he’ll be late doing more paperwork but tells her to go and have fun since she’s been having a rough week at school. Nearly all of the kids are sick and miserable so she’s been trying to keep her class light and easy. 

Nola heads home to change out of her school outfit and by the time she’s at the bar, the streetlights started to turn on as the night sky darkened. She could hear the music from the sand as she parked her car and took a deep breath before heading inside. It doesn’t take her long to spot Jake because he’s gathered by the dartboard and pool table with the other sea of khaki colored pilots. 

As if he could sense her, Jake turns around and makes eye contact. 

“Nola James, as I live and breathe,” he greets smiling and she rolls her eyes with a smile as she approaches them. She tries not to notice the eight pairs of eyes watching her every move. “I’m glad you could make it.”

“I’ve had a rough week so I need a little break,” she says. 

“I can make that happen,” he flirts and Nola ignores it because that’s how he’s always been. “Let me introduce you to everyone. You already know Javy.”

“Hey Javy,” she smiles and he tips his beer towards her.

“Nola,” he grins. 

“Then there’s Phoenix, Rooster, and Bob over there,” Jake slings his arm around her shoulders as he makes introductions. 

She ignores the slight flutter in her stomach from his touch. This is the first time they’ve touched since she passed out in her classroom.

“What interesting names, but it’s nice to meet you all.” 

“They’re our Call Sign names,” the woman named Phoenix says.

“Call Signs?” she glances up at Jake. 

“When we’re flying it’s what they call us over comms. It’s quicker and easier than using our real names.”

“Oh. What’s yours?” 

“You don’t have to know–”

“His is Hangman,” Javy laughs and Jake glares at him. 

“Why Hangman?” 

“Because he always leaves you hangin’ to dry in the sky,” the tall blond named Rooster says but it seems playful. 

“He always leaves you behind,” Bob pipes up and Nola notices how quiet he seems. 

“Ohh, yeah,” she peers up at him and his jaw ticks. “That fits him perfectly.” 

The others laugh and Jake shakes his head and sighs when he looks at Nola. She smiles sweetly at him but her eyes give him a knowing look because they both know how he’s left her behind in the past. 

“You know what Penny just put in the back, Nola? A beer pong table,” Javy says breaking up their silent conversation. 

“Oh really?” she snaps her head in his direction.

“Yeah. What do ya say? You and Hangman versus me and Rooster,” he challenges. 

“What do you say Hangman?” she asks and Jake shakes his head. 

“Let’s smoke ‘em, darlin’,” he leads her outside then calls over his shoulder, “Get her a hard lemonade, Phoenix.” 

They really are transported to the past when they play beer pong. Javy and Rooster (who’s real name is Bradley) are pretty good components but Jake and Nola are still unstoppable. She has a great time and is laughing a lot because they all tease Jake. Jake and Nola end up winning and they give a loud high five in celebration.

“We didn’t even have your cowboy hat as our good luck charm,” she says.

“Cowboy hat?” Phoenix’s eyebrows raise. “Oh I gotta see Bagman in a cowboy hat, please tell me you have a picture of that.” 

“Of course, I do,” Nola pulls out her phone and opens up her phone. 

“No, no, no, no, no way,” Jake chants and reaches around Nola for her phone.

She squeals when his hands grab for her phone, then he starts to tickle her sides and she’s gasping for air from laughing. 

“It’s in my album labeled ‘Summertime’!” Nola hands off her phone to Phoenix and the guys crowd around her as she swipes to the proper album. 

“I’m gonna get you for showing them that, Nola,” Jake threatens against her cheek and she snorts in response. 

“Okay, Jake,” she pats his cheek and tilts her head to look at him. 

They’re stuck in that trancelike moment again, green eyes captivating her deep blue. He stands up straighter since they were kind of bent over the table, but his hands still held onto her waist. Their faces are close, too close where they can feel the soft breath from each other’s lips. 

While they were having a rekindled moment, Phoenix, Rooster, Bob and Javy couldn’t stop swiping through her photo album.

Every picture was of her and Jake, most of them were kissing pictures. Kissing each other’s cheeks or on the lips. In all of them they were wrapped around each other as if they were one embodiment. Phoenix looks at Javy, his mouth is in a straight line and they share a look. 

“Shit,” Rooster mutters because he sees those pictures in real time as Jake and Nola are still wrapped around each other. “He still loves her, doesn’t he?”

“He never stopped,” Javy confirms.

“But she’s engaged,” Bob says.

“What?” Phoenix looks up from Nola’s phone just as she and Jake are breaking apart. They smile awkwardly at each other and sure enough, there’s a huge rock on Nola’s left hand. 

“Shit,” the four of them say. 

***

Nola is thinking of Jake more and more and it’s weighing on her just as much as the ring on her finger. She can’t be thinking of him because she’s engaged to Johnny. And with his promotion coming up so soon she needs to support him. 

It’s been a week since she met his friends at the bar and she came to a decision to tell Jake they shouldn’t see each other anymore. Things will get too sticky too fast between them. When she texts him Saturday morning if they could talk–Johnny was doing inspections on the ship all day–he said sure but they were at the beach all day. 

When she arrives at the beach, they’re all playing football but it’s not regular football. There’s two balls and each team is playing together and against each other. Nola doesn’t understand football all that well but she knows this isn’t the way to play it. She spots Jake right away and scowls because he’s shirtless and glistening with sweat in the golden sun. 

Her eyes follow his back as he bends down to taunt Rooster, the muscles in his shoulder flex and pull and Nola is completely distracted until Phoenix bumps into her with her shoulder. 

“Hot out, isn’t it?”

“Y-yeah,” Nola smiles awkwardly and forces herself to avert her gaze from Jake. Phoenix gives her a knowing look but doesn’t comment on the fact that Nola was drooling over her ex. “Are they almost done? I have to talk to Jake.”

“They probably won’t be done for a while.”

“Why aren’t you playing?” Nola asks but notices she’s in a sports bra and shorts. 

“I was, but then I got a stitch in my side so I went to get some water from Penny. I’ll sit with you while we wait for them to finish,” she nods her head towards the picnic table in the sand. 

They sit in silence as they watch the guys play and joke with each other. They laugh off fumbles and tackles, helping each other up and completely ignore the whistle being blown by a guy named Hondo. All the while, Phoenix is watching Nola who keeps her eyes on Jake. 

“Jake says you’re engaged to Lieutenant Fischer?” Phoenix asks and Nola tears her eyes away from the game. She covers her hand over her ring.

“I am, yeah,” she smiles.

“How long have you two been together?” 

“Two years. We moved out here about nine months ago because he got relocated, then he was called to go to Europe.” 

“You’ve been engaged all that time?”

“Just right before he left for Europe,” Nola clarifies. 

“That had to be hard.”

“It was, but he’s home now.” 

“Bet it was awkward when they met for the first time, huh?”

Nola stares at her then quickly lowers her eyes to her fingers that are twisting over each other in nerves. Phoenix picks up on it and her heart kind of breaks at the sight. 

“They haven’t met yet.” 

“Oh. Nola, can I ask you something?” 

“Sure.”

“What happened between you and Jake?” 

“That’s a loaded question,” Nola chuckles, then looks in his direction again. He’s tousling Bob’s hair like she’s seen him do to her own brother Lincoln. “Everything and nothing happened.”

“I don’t understand,” Phoenix’s brows furrow in confusion.

“I don’t either to be honest,” Nola sighs. “Jake was my first everything. First love, first time, first rough break up. He’s my–was my person.”

“What happened?” 

“He broke my heart. The first time was when he was going back to the academy for the second year and he wouldn’t have time for me as he would like. The second time was when he was going to start his flight training and he didn’t want me to worry about him in case something happened to him,” she scoffs remembering that night perfectly. 

“I told him I’ll worry whether we’re together or not. And then he got hurt and was in a hospital in Germany and Javy called me. I sat with him for three days in the hospital until he woke up and at first I thought, ‘this is it. He’ll realize we belong together.’ But then he broke my heart again by saying I shouldn’t have come and I left.”

“I always knew he was an idiot. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up the past–”

“You’re fine,” Nola waves her off. “It’s messy and complicated but he and I know each other so well…it’s…yeah. Complicated.” 

“Can I ask you something again?” Phoenix asks after another moment of silence. 

“Sure,” Nola smiles. 

“If he did change and realize you two should be together…” Phoenix asks slowly, “would you be with him?” 

“I know we just met, and I haven’t even admitted this to my best friend but yeah, I would in a heartbeat.”

Nola sighs and looks down at her ring, she feels the weight of it and thinks of Johnny. When she looks up, Jake is jogging over to her waving his hand. She has to tell him they can’t see each other anymore. Johnny hasn’t fully healed the wounds from Jake–she’s not sure she’ll ever fully be healed–but he’s laid a careful bandage over it. 

“Hey Nola,” Jake pants once he’s in front of her. He slides his aviators on top of his head and Nola feels trapped yet again. 

They weren’t alone to talk until after they all shared a bite to eat. She and Jake were sitting on the back deck sharing a drink. 

“So Jake–”

“Wait, before you start can I say something?” He asks and Nola nods. “I’m sorry about the last time I saw you. I kept breaking your heart and I’ve hated myself every day for it.”

“You were the only one who could fix it, remember?” 

“It doesn’t matter. I ruined what we had for stupid reasons and I should have told you in Germany that I…” he takes in a deep breath and glances at her diamond ring. “It’s too late now.” 

He rises from his chair and leans on the railing of the deck listening to the waves crash and roll along the shore. 

“Should have told me what?” she prompts moving next to him. 

“It doesn’t matter now,” he shakes his head. “What matters is that you’re happy and you are. You have your dream job and are engaged to be married.”

Nola bites her lip, the words of goodbye hang heavy on her tongue but she can’t get her lips to form the words. He lifts his head looking at her, there’s a static energy vibrating around them. There’s a big gust of wind and it tosses her hair in front of her face. Without thinking, Jake raises his hand to tuck it back behind her ear and neck. 

When his fingertips touch her skin, that static energy intensifies. He has to use both hands to keep her hair away from her face which ultimately ends with him cradling her face. Nola tries to keep her breathing even and her eyes away from his but his hands feel so warm on her cheeks. His cologne sweeps over her, mahogany and teakwood envelops and intoxicates her. 

Jake inches closer, his thumb stroking over her cheek.

“Jake, I–”

“Shh, just…wait,” he hushes and tilts her face upwards. Her eyes remain downcast, she focused on his pinned wings. “Nola.”

“Hm?”

“Please look at me,” he whispers. 

Against her better judgment, she does. She lifts her eyes slowly then jumps at how close his face is to hers. He hushes her again.

“Just want to pretend…for a moment…” he mutters and closes his eyes. 

Nola’s heart is beating so loud in her chest. Her cheeks are blazing from his hands and each stroke of his thumb leaves a new scorch. It’s easier to look at him with his eyes closed and she tentatively presses her hand against his cheek. She notices a faint scar by his brow that was never there before and she wonders how it got there.

Was it from his crash in Germany? Was it from a different mission? Or was it an accident unrelated to flying?

She presses the pad of her finger to the white jagged scar, Jake leans into her touch humming softly. When he shifted his head it brought his lips into her palm and she felt that spark again then tried to pull her hand away.

“Don’t,” he stops her hand by placing his on top. He keeps it against his cheek, his eyes still closed. His fingers close around hers and press into her palm and she closes her thumb over the back of his knuckles. It’s like they’re holding hands but not really. 

He lifts her hand a little and before she can stop him, he kisses the inside of her palm and his eyes open up staring right at her. He kisses her palm again, then the petal soft inside of her wrist where he can feel her heartbeat pulsating like a hummingbird’s wing. 

Something pulls within her, like a magnet but stronger. Jake is unblinking when he drags her hand to the back of his head and her fingers close around tufts of his hair. The movement brings their faces closer and his eyes transform between two and one as she tries to focus. 

“My Nola.”

That snaps her out of it, along with a loud cheer from inside the bar. She jerks away from him and Jake reaches for her.

“No! I can’t do this,” she holds her hand up to keep him away then runs off the deck. 

“Nola! Nola, wait!” 

Nola races home and is happy to see Johnny’s home. He was looking through her wedding book on the couch and her heart lurched again. 

“Hi baby,” he greets then notices her demeanor. “What’s wrong?”

She shakes her head crossing the room and tosses the book off to the side so she can straddle him and press her lips to his. Johnny kisses her back immediately, one hand holding onto her back and the other gripping her neck to keep her stable against him. Nola breaks the kiss so she can remove her jacket and shirt.

“Lia, what’s–”

“Shh,” she shushes and tugs his shirt up and off his chest before kissing him again. She grinds her hips into his and he groans. Nola peppers kisses along his jaw and neck.

“Lia, baby, hold on,” his hands grip her hips, forcing her back a little. He cups her cheek softly, his warm brown eyes gentle and concerned. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, I just missed you and want to be with you right now. Please, Johnny. I need you.” 

He stares at her for a beat then cups his hands to her ass and thighs so he can stand up. She clings to him tightly, kissing his neck and shoulder as he walks towards their room. He tosses her on their bed, she’s already shimmying out of her leggings and underwear. He’s quick to remove his own sweats and climbs on top of her. 

Their mouths connect and she envelops him between her legs, moaning into his mouth when his dick presses against her. They join together in a frenzy, Nola sighs and hums at the sensations he’s giving her. When she opens her eyes they play tricks on her because she’s staring at Jake’s face. She snaps them shut but still pictures him when Johnny kisses her again. 

Against her own rational thought, she orgasms quickly because she is picturing Jake and feeling his hands on her face like they were at the bar. His lips warm on her palm and wrist. When Johnny gives her a hard thrust she’s reminded of a time when Jake held her wrists above her head.

“Lia.”

“Nola.”

She bites into Johnny’s shoulder to keep herself from uttering Jake’s name. A vision of him on the beach plays through with his rippling back muscles. Johnny says her name again and she knows he’s close. Her stomach coils when he says her name again.

“Lia, Lia,” he grunts. 

“My Nola.” 

She heard Jake’s voice too and then Johnny released his orgasm onto her stomach since he didn’t have time to put on a condom. Nola holds Johnny close, his breath hot on her neck as she stares at the ceiling. 

What did she just do?

[calypso-finale]

Fifty Five. Part 2

My face is so red from the gym, I hate it “you look flustered” Ti said, she pointed out the damn obvious “I know, I was just working out more then I should have. Too busy thinking, Ti, Halle I am sure you both know each other anyways” placing my bag on the counter top “hey girl, we do know each other, in passing that is. Rylee said you was here” walking over to the fridge to get the water out “I am, she told you nice things I hope” closing the fridge door “nothing but nice things” I chuckled “see, I am kind” I shrugged, opening the bottle “so speak, I don’t have much time I need to go” she barely let me drink “where is the rascal gone? The home is cleaner then it usually is” I chuckled “cheeky fucking bitch” how rude of her “oh Rylee let him have another day with the child he acknowledges when he feels like it” Ti never stops “I get it” I pointed “what happened here? Seems a little spicy” Halle said “Ti took it upon herself to attack Oakley which he didn’t take well too” I eyeballed her “So what happened?” Halle asked “what happened was he just text me saying can I keep him for another day, I said yeah and then she thinks I’m being too kind but what does she want me to do refuse him to be a dad? You’re not a mother Ti, you don’t understand!” I half shouted “ladies, just calm down. Damn, you both going back and forth, that’s fine. He asked and you said yes, that’s between you both, you’re doing right by Aziel” looking at Ti “see, why can’t you just think outside of that damn box, you don’t think about Aziel. You ain’t here with him, Halle you seen it right?” I pointed “he loves his dad a lot, that rascal never stops but yeah, that’s fine. Make it about him, but I think. Like don’t quote me on this, but Oakley is the same guy that doesn’t exactly know how to change a nappy right; he does it badly so who is helping him or watching him, you told me that house is full of female things so I think like you should do a surprise visit, unannounced because I mean like, who is helping him? We need to maybe just test it, we can’t fully trust this guy” Halle is right “you’re right, he likes to pass him back quick and prompt too. I’ll do that today, because he said pick him up tonight, I’ll go earlier just to pop around, if he has that girl doing that I’m going to cause shit” Halle smiled at me “mhmmm yeah, I think we need to find this out” I sighed out “he says he doesn’t want to do anything for his birthday, like nothing. It makes no sense to me” Halle is my counsellor, I really love that about her she is wise about me “I don’t know really, he I mean, I think he maybe. He can’t celebrate it with his family, you said no. He maybe doesn’t want to do it with yours so he just said no” Halle could be right “just keeps peace, he did tell you he was tired and had had enough so I don’t know but I think, please do a surprise visit and no hard feelings Ti but leave your sister at home” I laughed “she has more for him she said” Ti is not happy but she can’t do that, it’s too much when I have a son, if I didn’t then I wouldn’t care she could have done anything with him.

I’m doing what Halle said, she is right. I mean I need to know that he isn’t doing what I hope he isn’t doing, I pray I don’t kick off because if he has and my child is there. I’m dragging his ass to court because that’s the only way he will see him after this, I’ve not told him I’m coming or anything, I’ve come two hours earlier then I said so this will be interesting to see what is happening really. I mean I would love to trust him, but his family took my child last time, he could be telling me anything. Pressing the buzzer and waiting; it’s quiet in there. I am feeling so apprehensive because what if he has that girl near my child or his family are around and he lied, the door opened and it’s Wyge again “surprise” he said laughing “you too” he let me in, so he seems cool and calm so maybe I need to not be a dick but I’m here now. Walking into the living room and it’s clean this time, nothing around just his games console, it’s quiet and nothing around “where is my child?” It’s too quiet, what if he has taken him to his mother’ “dining room, he said nobody to disrupt him” well I will be “is there anyone here? Before I flip out?” Wyge laughed “just us guys” walking off, I mean he could be lying to me. It’s so quiet in there as I pressed my ear to the door, opening the door slowly and peaking around “look at me” Oakley said, looking around the dining room from what I can see “there, finish it now. Your cousin makes good cakes doesn’t she, she good” opening the door wider “mommy!” Aziel spat “careful” Aziel was rushing to come to me and he helped him off the seat “hey baby, what is this?” He ran to me “mine” he pointed; he held my hand “your birthday?” He nodded his head, Aziel shut the door behind me “you go and sit back down, I will sit here” I said to him, Aziel went running back to his dad “what you doing?” Oakley asked him, he snatched his plate and ran to me “no I don’t want that” I laughed “you go back around here” grabbing the plate, walking around the table and placing the plate on the table “you sit here, and you eat it” placing him back on the chair and pushing him in “I will sit there” away from them, I just crashed their moment clearly.

This is what I get for not being trustworthy “you want some?” Oakley asked after a good five minutes, he didn’t speak a word until now but I’m guessing he did a little birthday thing “it’s ok thanks” Oakley looked at me, I feel bad now, I need to make something up “it’s homemade, not me. My cousin made it, she bakes” looking around me “I’ll just take some home” I added “you can take the whole thing then” shaking my head “I’ll be away” he nodded his head “cool” he just said “I wasn’t checking up on you” Oakley laughed “sure, it’s fine” he shrugged “it’s peak, I don’t mind it. I’ll be away anyways, I’ll just give it away” nodding my head, I can see he’s bought him a bike and clothes “you show mom what you got for your birthday?” Oakley said to him, he shook his head “you keeping it away from me?” Aziel smiled “that’s fine you keep secrets” he stood up on the chair, he pointed at a box “you want mom to see that?” Oakley asked him “yes!” He slid the box to me, it’s a big box actually “what is it you got here” opening the box, seeing the two all diamond chains with a photo pendant decorated in diamonds, the one chain slightly smaller “you got this from America? It’s icebox” I said “Ybeez picked it up when he came back” nodding my head, looking at the picture it’s of him and Aziel both matching “when was this?” I asked “erm like the last time I had him, we had a photoshoot with Walid and I sent it there to get it made, we both got one” it’s a cute picture “yeah can tell that’s a genuine smile, your eyes are a fully closed, that’s nice” closing the box “I like it Aziel, you and dad” he smiled “my dad” he jumped on him, he loves to play rough with him “where is the rest of the friends of yours?” It’s been quiet “Wadz and I aren’t speaking, and erm yeah. I just wanted to be on my own, then erm yeah. I raised the issue with Aziel at my parents’ home, they fully deny it. And then my nana phones police on me, she said I was being violent, I hit my brother because he was saying some shit. So that happened, she said she doesn’t have an issue, Neil is black, she is just being rude to us and I’m allowing it. Saying all these things, people turn pagan” him and Wadz are joined at the hip “when that happened, she called police on me. That chick you think I’m dating, she was there and told the police I have a temper so like yeah, it’s been fun. So like yeah, I have things I need to deal with and yeah. That is why I haven’t seen him, just had things going on, I mean besides harassing you” rolling my eyes “yeah, well I’m glad you went quiet, but you don’t tell me things like this, why did you and Wadz fall out?” Least he knows he did harass me “he says I’m mismanaging myself and money and how I am, I told him that it’s me that made him who he is, I fed him, I feed his whole life. If it wasn’t for me he would be still nothing, so yeah, we split he says it’s on me” he shrugged “so where are you going?” I asked “Thailand, no weird shit” he laughed “just me and myself” I pulled a face “Thailand? Alone? People get killed, I mean that’s unsafe” he didn’t say anything “allow it, it’s fine. I’ll FaceTime him on his day” he got up from the chair.

Watching Oakley pick Aziel off the bike “you can play on this when you come again” stepping back as Oakley picked him up in one arm, Aziel is laughing his little ass off “you know, my family don’t mind you. My mother did say she was there for you always” he laughed “appreciate it” Wyge stepped out “you leaving us now, I will miss you” he chuckled “go away!” He spat to him “why aren’t you going Thailand?” I asked him “who is going there?” He questioned “nobody, just ignore her” he looks so confused, Oakley is putting Aziel shoes on for him “you be good yeah, see you when you come back” he picked him up and stood him up “how old are you going to be?” He asked him “hold them up, go on. Show off” Aziel showed up two fingers “yeah boy” Oakley chuckled “that’s right yeah, big two and that. Alright, you can take him now” Oakley got up from the floor, watching Aziel just look at his dad, if Oakley was more active it would be the best for him, but he isn’t and I hate that but that’s on him “I’ll walk you out” nodding my head, taking the bag from the side “come, don’t you be going back for the bike, we use that later” he was about to run and go to the bike, least he knew what was going to do. Walking down the steps, Kayson got out of the car. He’s still here, poor guy just waiting around “hey, what you do that for? Kick my car, stupid” Oakley laughed at him “get in, go on” Oakley helped him in “daddy” he whined out “what is it?” Oakley is more concentrating on getting him into car seat “miss you” Oakley cooed out “awww I miss you too, you listening to me ain’t you. You going to have so much fun, you see Kiss and everything so you good. Have fun” he showed affection to him, and I like that, he pressed a kiss to his cheek “bye my guy” Aziel dapped him “my guy!” Aziel shouted, Oakley walked away “take care” he just said to me as he walked off, Aziel is still waving at him.

Placing his bag on the kitchen counter, watching Aziel jumping on Ti as he came in “I missed my child!” Ti spat “and what is this? Let me look at this” she said looking at his chain “live yours, oh brother. I got to see his face now” side eyeing my sister “how was it?” She asked “yeah, yeah. It went well, bittersweet I guess. He just had a little thing for his birthday, and he is going to Thailand on his own, so he won’t be here and I don’t think it’s clever or wise for him to do that” I said “well if anything, maybe someone will take him out. He needs it, then you Aziel can get a better daddy” I gasped “Ti please shut the fuck up, I have told you about speaking such fucking shit in front of my son!” I half shouted “then you wouldn’t be fucking chained to him Rylee! He’s a piece of shit! Let him rot, Aziel don’t need him anyways!” She shouted back “when has that idiot even been a dad to him, half of the time he’s on the phone with him. He needs to go, then you can go home too! End of London, I think you need to let this place go, he’s gone. His family gone, come home” she is unbelievable “that’s not the fucking point Ti, what you said was nasty and I don’t care” how could she say that “that’s because you still care about him. Just pack your things so we can leave tomorrow, don’t want you to end up in Thailand too” putting a finger up at her “you’re so fucking wrong in this” I mumbled “it’s the truth, let him go and fuck some ladyboys. Let them kidnap him being the bozo on his own, who cares? I don’t” Ti is wrong, I don’t care what she says but whatever.

Looking out of the window sighing out, leaving London to go to LA. I don’t know why but I feel like LA isn’t for me anymore. It just gives me bad vibes because of everything, I mean it’s my home, but I just don’t feel it at all. Like my family think it’s all about him, when in real terms I prefer being in London, I have better friends here too. LA is about to be North coming after me, she has been messaging me and saying how sorry she is, and she loves me and that she cares. I don’t want to hear it really; I don’t need her in my life either. I wish I could bring my friend with me but sadly they have jobs so they can’t just come like that, but I got them for next time “hey, where you get that from?” I said to Aziel seeing the LV scarf “oh” he’s took his dad scarf “go to sleep” Aziel got up from the seat and climbed over to me “love you” pressing a kiss to his head, wrapping my arms around him as he snuggled into me “let’s take your shoes off” Ti has fallen asleep already, the plane hasn’t even left yet but we aren’t exactly speaking because I did not like how she was and how she spoke, it was wrong with what she said, I guess she will be telling her man this anyways, not like I care. I haven’t fallen out with her, I just didn’t agree with how she said things, I get she is angry but to say that, it’s wrong but she is mad with me for not agreeing.

I was going to go to my house but then I decided to see my parents first before I go to the house and just settle down there, I didn’t bother taking any of the cases out. Watching Aziel run inside ahead of me “my first loves are home” my dad said smiling “your first love, just me” I pointed out, Aziel ran back out to me “what is wrong” he lifted his arms up to me, picking him up “what is that all about?” I asked, he is being funny now “dad” I said “Rylee, Big A. What the hell young fella?” my dad spat, hugging my dad “I think he is being shy, look. It’s kiss?” he is shy, clearly he doesn’t want to see them right now “ok, whatever. Nobody forcing you right now, mom” my mom looks so happy to see us “this is a surprise? You never said” hugging my mom “well it’s his birthday and I am celebrating here with my family, hoping you all pay out too” I joked “cheeky, I know she means that” I sniggered, she knows damn well I do mean it “well, you got to spoil the only grandchild. Mr Muscle man!” I said to junior “you on the ten pack” he pulled a face at me “shut up” he said “you good?” I said to him, he nodded his head “I’m good, how come you’re here?” I gasped “I live here” I joked “well I thought I would see my family first; everyone is shocked but mom, she is the most happy. Aziel, stop being silly” I don’t know why he is being shy “nah Aziel hurt me, you always come to me” my dad said “he will eventually come to you, but yeah. I am here for a few weeks” I smiled “welcome home daughter” my mother said.

[otome-translation]

Hiiro no Kakera Part 2

It was a dark and deep emotion that seemed to suck me in when I stared at them.

For some reason I though I was being taken away.

These words burned into my head.

I didn’t think anything about it.

My legs started to move on their own. I run as fast as I can to get back the way I came from. However… However the three creatures from the road came slowly to me. They stretched out their large, eerie hands while approaching me. Like that… I gasped. My head got dizzy and my vision went white for a moment. For a moment I think that if only I hadn’t chased after that mysterious creature. What should I do? What should I do? What should I do?! I looked around at the roadless woods. At that moment My hand was grabbed with a strong grib. Even when I tried to shake it off, it didn’t move. I can clearly hear my hear pounding. Caught. I got caught. ??? [You can’t do that.]

The moment I was about to let out a scream, my mouth was sealed. I was lifted up and made to forward. The boy looked as old as I am. He puts his mouth towards my ear and whispers. ??? [Don’t be upset. If you make a fuss, it will get noisy here.] Normally I would feel embarrassment over this overly familiar gestic. But in this kind of situation, it didn’t come to my mind. I have no idea what’s going on here. ??? [You’re from Tamayori’s blood, arent you? I was sent by Baba-san]

Tamayori, at this words my thoughts stopped for a moment.

I felt my heart pounding loudly.

I wonder, where have I heard that word before? But now is not the time to get distracted by such words. While the boy was saying such things, the strange jelly creatures are approaching little by little.

My mind goes blank. I don’t know what is going on anymore.

I forcibly removed his hands. MC [What is going on? Who the hell are you?]

??? [Be quiet] He had a strange bill-like object in his hand, which he pressed into mine.

??? [They are persistant. I don’t want to cause trouble. Plus, I’m not good with spells.]

Thats not an explanation at all.

MC [Eh? What? Spells? What are you talking about…]

??? [This is Baba-sama’s special creation. You can skip a lot of preparation and complete the spell in a short time. You are already holding it.]

MC [Huh?] ??? [Do you want to be taken away to the end of the everlasting world?] [Be taken away] Those words are burned into my head.

I have no idea what you are talking about.

I didn’t understand him at all. But I’m sure that [being taken away] is probably not a good thing.

Thats why.

??? [Be prepared] MC [What!]

My teeth started to chatter. My body shakes so much that It’s hard to stand.

??? [Okay, listen to me]

The jelly creatures are slowly approaching us.

I’m confused, but I nod. I don’t know if I can really rely on him, but for now I don’t have a choice but to leave it to this person for now.

Now that I was faced with something so unrealistic as a flying jelly creature. The little bit of unreality didn’t brother me at all anymore.

Anyway, we have to do something about this place.

??? [Repeat. Heaven for my father, earth for my mother, in the midst of the land.]

Little by little the jelly creatures are approaching us.

He is the only one I can rely on at the moment. Without knowing why, I continued chanting after his voice.

??? [South Star. Nord Star.]

He mutters those words. In a tense filled voice he says so calmly, rather then shouting.

I have no idea what he is talking about. Nontheless, I repeat his words.

I could feel a strange power inside my body.

It was even strange for me.

It rides in the blood and travels through the body, which eventually concentrates in the hand that holds into the bill-like object.

To awaken new, unused senses.

??? [Sandai. Gyoukujo. Left Blue Dragon, Right white tiger, Front Vermilion Bird, Back Xuanwu, Deputies]

I heared his strained voice. If we fail, its over, that’s what the voice is telling me.

His nervousness is contagious. The word he said earlier about [taken away] is running through my head.

My body feels hot. I wonder what’s going on.

The jelly creatures hand is now right in front of me.

It’s only a few milimetres away before it will touch my face.

Suddenly the word [taken] pops up in my mind.

Taken away.

Be taken away.

I clung to his arms, strong hands holding me tightly as I responded.

He mutters in a low voice.

??? [Calm down. It’s fine. I’m here.]

These magical words, somehow calmed down my mind.

MC [What should I do?] Taking a deep breath, I asked.

??? [Stang up and chant.]

Following him, I recited the words.

Suddenly the note in my hand started to glow red.

In an instant, many things happened. The strength drained from my whole body. I felt as if my body was something very heavy and I almost collapsed on the spot.

He supported my body.

The color started to disappeared from the surrounding space and the note was gone.

Everything in sight now turned red.

The jelly creatures have stopped.

Not only that. I can not even hear anything. The chirping of birds, the sound of insects and the sound of the leaves in the wind has stopped.

MC […What is going on?]

It is like time has stopped.

Anyway, it seems like the immediate danger has now passed.

Today alot of unexplainable things are happening in front of me.

Suddenly ‘I realised that I was being held in the mens arms. I panicked and tried to pull myself away, but-

The man was hugging me tightly, which I found somewhat nostalgic, along with being embarrassed.

??? [Don’t dawdle. Now’s the time.]

I don’t even have time to reply.

He forcefully grabbed my arm and jumped past the jelly creatures.

He run down the mountain road at a great speed. The wind is blowing at me and the wind that hits my face is painful.

The moment I got out of the mountain road and returned to the bus stop, the red would instantly disappears.

The sound of the birds, insects, the rustling of trees and the sound of the wind all returned.

I was surprised and speechless. I felt like I had returned to my original world.

… This world is good. I was saved. Thats what crossed my mind.

MC […na, na]

My body starts shivering, even though I’m not cold. There was so much I didn’t understand. Relief and the fear I had felt earlier hit me all at once.

??? [Were you scared?]

There seemed to be a slight, gentle ring to the way he said it, which somehow made me very angry.

I think, I just wanted to get mad at someone.

… And he hugged me earlier.

That embarrassment also made me end up shouting.

MC [Of course! What’s that!? What was that red color now? Who are you?]

I was scared. I wanted to start crying right now.

I think the only reason I didn’t do that was because I just wanted to appear to be strong for that person in front of me.

MC [What the hell is that!]

He looks at me a little surprised, then gives a small, I’m not sure if it’s a sigh of relief or ridicule.

??? [What’s your name?]

MC […[Name(1)m Name (2), but…]

??? [I’m Onizaki. Takuma Onizaki. I came by order of Baba-sama to guide you home.] The man, who called himself Takuma, looked at me and said so.

I thought he was a strange person.

While his eyes were full of confidence and had a strong glow, there was something like a strange loneliness behind them.

It calmed down the turmoiled a little bit inside of me.

…And if you do it right, you can’t help but think that it’s a little bit cool.

MC [What was that earlier? What did I do?]

Takuma [It’s a so called (Spirited Away). You were almost taken away. What you’ve done is a shortened version of the (blessing of self-protection).]

Takuma answered so, as if it were a matter of course.

Takuma [Do you understand?]

MC […not at all]

Takuma [I guess]

The man replied casually and stood up quickly.

Takuma [I will take you to Baba-Sama. Don’t let them take you again.]

After saying that, he walked away. Why is it, that the person who leads the way leaves me behind?

MC [Hey, wait! Baba-Sama, Baba-Sama, who the hell are you talking about?]

Takuma looked at me with a strange expression.

Takuma [Who’s your grandmother?]

I still didn’t understand what he was saying, but I wondered if this was the person my grandmother was talking about to pick me up.

Anyway, thanks to him, it seems to be true that I was able to get through some kind of crisis.

I though that this is the only thing that I have to be somehow grateful for.

MC [Hey. Tell me. What was that earlier?]

I desperately try to follow Takuma, who walks fast, while also carrying my heavy luggage.

It was not quiet. It was a bit noisy with all the sounds of birds and insects.

I felt that the noise was somewhat comfortable.

All around me are rice fields and only a few people can be seen. The sky is clear and high, which makes me a little happy.

But right now, I was much, much more concerned about the series of events that had just taken place, then being happy.

MC [Hey. Hey, can you hear me?　If you can hear me, answer me. What’s the matter with you, making a girl carry all that weight?]

… He is ignoring it.

I went to an all-girls’ school all my life, and it’s been a long time since I’ve talked to a boy one-on-one like this, so I’m a bit nervous.

With an angry look on his face, he just kept on walking.

I wish you would be a bit more considerate.

MC [Hey. Can you hear me? I’m carrying some heavy luggage here.]

Takuma [I can’t hear you. If you don’t want to carry so much stuff, why don’t you just mail it from the start?]

Takuma stopped and looked at me. Takuma’s shadow is reflected at an angle on the unpaved road.

MC [I know you can hear me]

I took a deep breath and unloaded my luggage.

MC […Oh, it’s so heavy]

Takuma [Are you tired?]

MC [Obviously]

Normally, I wouldn’t raise my voice over this.

But after all what happened like the notes and the strange spell-like thing I did earlier.

MC […somehow my body feels heavy]

Takuma slowly approached and picked up my luggage.

Takuma [I take it]

Before I could reply, Takuma suddenly started to carry my luggage.

I was a bit surprised by this unexpected behaviour. Until now, he never answered me when I said that.

Takuma […Even with the power of the notes, it might have been a bit harsh to suddenly us for an amateur.]

I felt that his voice contained a bit of kindness and for some reason I couldn’t reply.

MC [Hey. What was that earlier?]

Instead of saying thank you, I just repeated the question I already asked many times.

Takuma looked a bit annoyed, but he started to talk like he couldn’t help it.

Takuma [I told you it was (Spirited Away)]

MC [Spirited Away? Like the in an disappearance incident?]

Takuma [It will take you to the other side]

Takuma answered briefly.

MC [So, whats the other side?]

Takuma [It’s the world you just stuck your foot in.]

Some time ago.

Thinking back on it made my skin rush.

A Jelly creature floating in the air… That swaying outstretched hand.

MC [What about those strange creatures?]

Takuma [Weird creatures? No, that thing moves by a different rule then we do. Technically speaking they are not a living thing]

MC [Isn’t it a living thing?]

Takuma [That’s a Kami.]

MC [Kami?]

Takuma [..Oh I mean its a Kami. A God, you’ll understand]

Takuma [But unlike your idea of God, he’s everywhere]

MC [….I don’t know what God is, but]

Takuma scratched his head in frustration.

Takuma [I’m not good with this kind of lecture. It’s something I liketo entrust to Orochi-san]

MC […I have no idea what you are talking about]

As I was about to say that, I heard the faint sound of flowing water.

As I followed Takuma up the stairs, I saw the river.

It was a small river, but it shone in the sun. The wind was blowing lightly and the smell of autumn, which is getting deeper by the moment, was in the air around us

I remember this too. After all, I played a lot here.

If you walk along this bank for a while and then walk along a normal road, you will come to another mountain, and if you climb the stairs there, you will reach your grandmother’s house.

MC [.. Hey, what were you talking about? What do you mean, that was God?]

I asked Takuma, while half admiring the scenery.

Takuma [Have you ever heard of the word yaoyorozu no kami?]

Takuma [For example we have a river kami here, who guards the boundary.The kami from outside cannot come inside.]

MC [River Kami?]

Takuma [The bridge has a bridge kami, and the Jizo has a Jizo kami. Everything in the world has a god]

Takuma [So, don’t you think it’s only natural that there are some gods that do harm to humans?]

I’m feeling a little lost here.

… Honestly I can’t follow the conversation here.

If it hadn’t been for what happened earlier, I would have thought he was a big liar and that he was just having fun playing with me.

But after seeing these jelly creatures…

MC [That thing? It didn’t look like a god. It looked rather like a youkai]

Takuma [So that’s Kami-Sama and the monsters are Kami-Samas too]

MC [I don’t understand]

Takuma put his hand to his forehead and let out an annoyed voice

Takuma [I told you, I don’t like this kind of explanations. Get Baba-Sama to tell you]

He scratched his head, and then walked the rest of the way in silence, while I still tagged along.

I sighed, too, but somehow it made me laugh a bit, and I felt a bit less scared, even though I remembered what had happened earlier.

I was relieves that Takuma Onizaki, who helped me, is a human being with real human feelings.

After walking for a while and climbing up the stone steps, we finally arrived at the shrine.

I was going to ask Takuma a lot of questions along the way, but he seemed to be in a bad mood, so I kind of gave up on asking questions.

Since, grandma seems to know something, I thought it wouldn’t be a bad think to ask her.

The sun is warm and illuminates the shrine.

The whole area was surrounded by forest, there was nothing man-made except the shrine, and it felt like you were half out of the world of people.

I was a little, surprised to see people coming out of the precinct.

A man in a black suit suddenly appeared.

I think he is skinny, a bit hunched over and somewhat absend-minded.

Is it someone from the shrine? I give a small nod to a girl in kimono who comes out to accompany me.

??? Male [Well then, please give my best regard to Ugaya-San]

??? Female [Yes, sir.]

Girls bow their heads in a small but polite way.

It’s kind of special.

The man nodded once more and then slowly turned around and stares at me.

??? Male [Oh]

He said that and walked over here.

Takuma looked at the man a little suspiciously. The man seemed to notice this and gave a small wave.

??? Male [No,no, it’s okay. It’s okay I’m not doing anything.]

After saying that to Takuma he looked at me again.

???Male [Oh, you’re that one, right? Uguya-san’s granddaughter. Well if I remember correctly, your name is…]

MC [My name is Name(1) Name(2)]

??? Male [Right, that’s the name. Name(2)] Takuma […Who are you?]

??? Male [Me? I’m just a civil servant. My name is Masataka Ashiya. I work around here. I’m investigating shrines and temples]

A Civil servant. He kind of looks like that. Maybe he is someone from the village hall.

He looks at me and then opens his mouth amusingly.

Ashiya [Chumashou, Tsukasa’s complexion looks good. It’s good luck. It says ‘My long-cherished wish will come true’] #Sorry I can’t make much sense out of it at the moment.

MC [Eh? What is it?]

Ashiya [Oh, excuse me. My hobby is physiognomy]

He was trying to continue, but then reconsidered with a sly smile.

Ashiya [Well, my next job is waiting for me. I don’t seem to have much time to talk]

Ashiya-San said that with a sigh.

Ashiya [Well, I’ll see you again when I have a chance.]

Ashiya-San said that and left with a somewhat incomprehensible smile, in the direction we had come from.

MC […What a strange man]

I was somehow curious and stared at his back.

Takuma [He didn’t seem much like a dangerous guy]

Takuma said that and turned his face to the girl.

Takuma [That old man. Did he visit Baba-Sama?]

??? Female [Yeah, that’s right. Welcome home Onizaki-san]

In a clear, quiet voice she says that while giving a small smile.

….Hm.

Cute.

Even as a woman I think that she is pretty cute.

I feel like I lost here.

??? Female [This one?]

She looks at me and ask Takuma for confirmation.

Takuma [It’s Name(1) Name(2). It seemed like she arrived earlier than planned. I got caught up in a lot of trouble right away. I didn’t expect to suddenly go to the everlasting world.]

MC […You know what, don’t talk about people like they’re troublemakers]

The girl turned to me and then deeply bowed her head.

??? Female [Thank you for arriving early]

She said so quietly. Her voice was a little stiff.

…Let’s see, I wasn’t such a great person to addressed with honorifics by a girl I’ve just met. MC […Um, uh…]

I’m a bit embarrassed by her formal demeanor.

Takuma [It doesn’t matter. You don’t need to be so stiff. She hasn’t inherited the shrine yet.]

He told her something I didn’t quite understand, in a kind of soft voice.

After that

Takuma [Come here, Baba-Sama is waiting for you]

He said that to me in a curt voice.

…What’s with this difference in attitude?

??? Female [Let me show you around. I’ll take care of your luggage]

MC [No, no, no! I’ll take this stuff myself]

I hurriedly picked up my bag and headed for the front door.

The colour of the pillars and the feeling of the floorboards make me feel the age. The faint scent of incense sticks can be smelled.

… The atmosphere inside the house hasn’t changed at all.

For some reason, I feel like I’m back.

But then again, it’s not like that everything hasn’t changed at all.

??? Female [Baba-Sama is waiting for you in your room]

Just who the hell is this beautiful girl, who says this in such a formal tone?

MC [Ah, yes. I haven’t introduced myself yet. My name is Name(1) Name(2). I’m going to be here starting from today.]

I just put my head down and then looked at the girl.

MC [Can I ask for your name?]

The girl stared at me and lowered her head again.

Mitsuru [I’m sorry. Im part of a branch of the Ugaya Family. My name is Mitsuru Kotozu.]

Suddenly I’m being told of branch families.

MC [Ehm, I don’t know what this is about. But you don’t have to be so formal.]

MC [It’s a bit unusual if a girl around the same age does that to you.]

I don’t feel comfortable with it.

Mitsuru stared at me as if she had found something strange and then lowered her head again.

This time, I felt a little more familiar.

Takuma [Right. This guy is not that big of a deal]

I don’t think this is alright to say that to someone you’ve never met before…

MC [What do you even know about me? Nothing, we just met a while ago!]

Takuma at me with a angry face.

Takuma [Is that what you say to the person who saved your life? Mitsuru please guide her. I’m going to take a break for a while]

Mitsuru slightly bowed her head to Takuma.

Mitsuru [Thank you for your hard work]

Takuma replied with a ‘hmm’ and withdrew himself into the back of the corridor.

MC […I wonder if he’s a good or bad guy]

Mitsuru [Onizaki-San is a good guy]

Mitsuru said so firmly and started walking down the corridor saying ‘this way’.

I walked after her.

Actually, I’M fine without a guide, but it’s rude to refuse a favor.

The floorboards squeak when I walk on them. There are scratches on the cornors of the pillars. Everything is just as it used to be. It is kind of nostalgic.

[nicsnort]

Gravita Anima (part 67)

Nightcrawler/Fem!OC/Quicksilver Long-form romance and drama fic. All chapters have been posted on Ao3.

Intro (with link to Ao3 story) First Previous

After a pause in the conversation, Kurt tentatively reached out psychically to Xavier. Professor...I saw Quicksilver outside the doors listening in earlier. I know Elle wondered if he knew about her father...can we be certain that he isn’t involved? 

At Kurt’s mental prod Xavier gave a small nod. I suppose he may know something. As for him being involved...it would be a very convoluted plot if he were and quite clever to trick me. I know you do not trust him Kurt but I ask you to trust me.

Kurt bit into the cookie a bit too hard, wincing when he accidentally bit his own tongue. It was on his mind to suggest that Frost had somehow prepared Pietro to get him to trick the Professor, but he resisted. He wouldn’t insult the man with something he doubtlessly had thought of before. I trust you, Professor. And he did, without hesitation.

“Where would Manuel be likely to strike first?” He asked after a gentle pause, looking between the two women. His tail had taken to lightly wrap around Elle’s arm again. They didn’t know where he was, but he would find them -- or rather, he would find one of them. But would it be Elle or Dr. Hughes first? 

Xavier seemed to think the same, for he said, “Dr. Hughes if you’re able to stay here for a couple of days, I believe it would be best. We have a spare bedroom and wonderful internet connection -- thanks to a student named Shock -- so you can continue your practice.” He didn’t need to be in her mind to guess her worries regarding her practice.

At Xavier’s request, Elle looked at her mother. Dr. Hughes bit her lip in thought, the same way Elle did when making a difficult decision. The doctor nodded. “Thank you for your hospitality. That sounds lovely. I will call my secretary so she can let my patients know of the change.”

Dr. Hughes took out her phone and called. The others turned away ready to talk quietly among themselves about Hank’s school to give her privacy. That did not last for long.

“Stacy, my family emergency is going on longer than I thought I will be gone a couple of days now.”

“Hola Julia, it is so good to hear your voice again. I hope nothing is wrong with our daughter.”

“Manuel!” At the cry of terror, all three looked at Dr. Hughes. “What did you do to Stacy?!”

Elle’s mouth opened to say something but Julia held up a hand, shaking her head. 

“Stacy is fine, Carina, she is so sweet. Getting myself a coffee right now. Hopefully, she gets the order correct. You know how I hate it when they get it wrong. Now then, what is this about a family emergency? Did something happen to Eleanor? Was it that X-creature? Can’t trust a devil and if he is anything like his father…”

“Leave Eleanor and me alone, Manuel. I am warning you.”

“Or what, Julia? Will you psycho-analyze me? Call the cops? Shoot me with the gun under your desk? Or perhaps the one in your apartment? You know you can’t do anything to me. I left because you were starting to get boring but you’re not anymore. You’ll always be mine and you have a daughter to always remind you of it.”

“Eleanor is nothing like you.”

“I wouldn’t know. Maybe if I got to know her I would find that out...Eleanor!” Manuel shouted into the phone. The barely overheard conversation was now crystal clear. “Eleanor! Sweetie! Papa wants to have dinner with you!...hand the phone over to my daughter, Julia, or I will have Stacy do something she will very much regret later.”

Elle met her mother’s eyes and held out her hand. Hesitantly Dr. Hughes handed it over. “What,” Elle asked sharply.

“What tone, careful or else I’ll have to give you a spanking.” Manuel laughed at his own joke. “Now, did you take under consideration what I asked? I want to know my daughter. Have dinner with me and I will leave Julia alone.”

Elle looked between Kurt and Xavier. What should she do?

Tell him you will, Xavier spoke to Elle in her mind, minimizing the chance of either him or Kurt being overheard. It was unlikely he knew where they were and if he didn’t, that was a level of surprise they couldn’t afford to toss away. But you will decide the time and place...after you check your work schedule. 

They would need to plan, involving most of the X-men if needed. If they had a leg up on the man, they needed to use it. A battle would ensue, hopefully psychically, but anything was possible. A restaurant with just enough people, half of which would be their own people...it would take time.

Elle nodded at Xavier’s words. Squeezing Kurt’s hand for comfort she replied. “Fine but I am going to choose the time and place. I need to check my work schedule. I will leave a message for you at whatever hotel you are staying at.”

Manuel chuckled. “You can leave it at the Watergate, I wanted a classic.”

“Very well, I will leave you a message there by Friday.”

“I am looking forward to it, mi hija.” Manuel hung up the phone quickly. Elle handed it back to her mother before running a hand through her hair. 

“What the fuck does he want,” she groaned. Was this the Brotherhood? Or did the Brotherhood simply set him loose on them? 

“At least we know where he is,” Kurt remarked quietly. “He will want you on his side, Elle.” At least, that was his guess. 

On his side? What did that even mean? As far as Elle could tell the man was an egotistical abusing nut. He was more of a narcissist than Pietro or Magneto. No. That was it. He wanted her under his control. Just like he wanted her mother. He probably took a sick pleasure in forcing Elle to have dinner with him or risk her mother’s safety

Xavier leaned back in his chair and rested his elbows on the armrests. “As outrageous as his words are, it may be that he is interested in the young lady who shares his power. It may have little to do with the Brotherhood...just that he used the Brotherhood to get to you.” He could feel Kurt’s eyes on him and knew what the blue man was thinking. “I will talk to Wanda and Pietro to see if they can offer any insight.” 

“We tried that already, Professor.” Kurt explained, “Quicksilver wasn’t happy about it.” 

“Wanda may be more willing to help,” Xavier suggested, calm and collected. “I will ask her to come in before we make any further plans. Eleanor, Kurt, if you would...research what restaurants may have higher-class clientele -- the fewer people, the more discrete, the better.”.

At Xavier’s request, Elle nodded. She could already think of a few places that might work. If they chose a smaller family-run place maybe they could reserve the whole restaurant. Fill it with the X-men in disguise…

Xavier returned Elle’s nod and sent a mental message to Wanda. Could you please come to my office? I have a question for you concerning a sensitive matter.

It didn’t take long for Wanda to walk upstairs to the office. It had startled her a little to hear his voice in her head, only because it wasn’t Frost’s voice that she was accustomed to. Still, she could guess what this was about. With a brief knock, she entered and looked over the others. 

“Five’s a crowd,” Wanda remarked lightly, nodding to Xavier. “How can I help you, Professor?” 

Elle had half a mind to have Kurt show her mother to the guest bedroom when she saw Wanda enter. No, her mother could hear this. She wouldn’t hide things from her any longer...at least about the Brotherhood. Besides, this involved her too.

“Elle and I had a few questions for you. Please sit down,” Xavier said, gesturing to the last empty seat in front of the desk. Once she was seated he continued. “We wanted to know if you were aware of anything concerning a mutant named Manuel de la Rocha and his involvement with the Brotherhood? He is Eleanor’s biological father and recently began to threaten her and her mother.” Xavier nodded to Dr. Hughes. “Manuel mentioned Frost in speaking with Eleanor and we need to know if this is Magneto retaliating or something else.”

Wanda didn’t respond right away. She leaned back into the chair and sighed quietly. It felt more and more lately that she was playing the ‘older sister’ role. But Pietro needed that or else he’d...well, it was hard to tell. She assumed it would be somewhere in the middle of a crime spree and stuffed with Twinkies in a video game arcade. 

Having heard about what happened in the garden just now, she knew it was best that she played that role again here. All because Pietro was lashing out and throwing a tantrum from...her. “I may have heard something about that before we left in the middle of the night with a bag of our belongings.” She acknowledged. “It was Frost who mentioned it to Magneto if that matters. I don’t know anything else about the man other than Frost knew him well.” 

Frost had mentioned it to Magneto? So perhaps it was more the Ice Queen’s revenge than Magneto’s. At least revenge in this matter. But if Frost knew him well...yes that was something to be concerned about.

“And what did she tell him,” Elle asked hurriedly, forgetting it was Xavier who Wanda was technically talking to. “Do you remember?”

Xavier looked at Elle out of the corner of his eye but gave Wanda a nod. “Please, Wanda. If you could?”

Wanda wasn't entirely certain if she had forgiven Elle just yet. She didn't look behind her to the other woman but gave a grimace to Xavier. "In sum, it was that she happened to know who the empath's father is. She suggested a family reunion would be a fantastic farewell present. Magneto agreed. I suspect he latched onto the first good idea and went with it." After a pause, Wanda added, "It would not surprise me if they had known each other intimately…" 

Xavier rubbed the bridge of his nose. Yes. Erik would do something like this. The man may play a good game of chess but when angered he tossed the board. A punishment like this he would have found suitable. Yet it was likely he did not consider why Manuel had not heard of his daughter until now. He was aimed and released. No real purpose. A dog off his chain.

“I see, thank you, Wanda,” Xavier told her with a small nod. “Sorry to have bothered your reading.”

As Wanda left, part of Elle wanted to go after her and speak. They hadn’t really talked since she had come to stay with the X-men. Elle felt like she deserved an explanation for everything and an apology. But perhaps now was not the time. When this was over they would speak but Elle had to focus on her mother first.

She leaned over to look at Kurt’s laptop that he was looking up restaurants on. “Find anything promising,” she asked before having a thought. “Mom, is there any food that he hates?”

“Anything that he has to eat with his hands, he thinks it is unrefined…”

Elle thought for a moment. “Authentic Mexican? Tacos are nice and messy…”

Dr. Hughes gave a small smile. “He does think Mexico perverted the Spanish language.”

“Hm?” Kurt blinked and looked at the computer. Oh, yes, that was right; they had given the illusion of privacy. He completely wasn’t listening to what Wanda was saying and wondered once again if the twins could be trusted. He was looking up restaurants. The sheepish grin he gave Elle told her that he had been...momentarily distracted. “Right, so...Taco Cabana?” He half-joked as he cleared his throat. “Kidding. Let’s see…” He typed in a few words and scrolled down.

After a minute, he exclaimed, “Found one! The place looks pricey...but they also have very bright decorations. That’s a good sign, isn’t it?” He pulled up the map. “It’s close to where he is staying. I think we can make reservations.”

“Excellent,” Xavier smiled gently, “that is a good lead. Kurt, why don’t you and Eleanor show Dr. Hughes to her room? I’ll assemble the X-men to discuss details.” 

“Of course, Professor.” Kurt set the computer aside. Instead of teleporting the ladies, he would walk Dr. Hughes so she might know how to get around the mansion. He went down to the hall where the guest rooms were with the rooms of the X-men were near. Kurt opened up one of them and gestured to Julia. 

“Here you are, Dr. Hughes. My room is just down the hall on the third door to the right.” He hadn’t thought to mention where Elle’s ‘room’ was since she stayed with him -- he hoped it wouldn’t be an issue as he thought of it after a delayed moment.

“Your room,” Dr. Hughes asked with a sly grin as she looked at Elle. “Of course, thank you, Kurt. I think I’ll just take some time to myself for a while. I will see you at dinner?”

“Of course mom,” Elle told her with a blush on her cheeks. “We’ll stop by to show you the way, just in case.”

As Dr. Hughes slipped into the guest bedroom Elle leaned against the wall with a sigh. Why did it have to be like this? She could handle her father being an abusive asshole. Elle had always suspected as much. But to have him be a mutant like her. A mutant who, as far as she could tell, did precisely what Elle always feared and hated. He used his power to control others, to manipulate them, and - what she truly feared the most - to make them love him.

Looking up at Kurt she gave a weak smile. He knew what she was going through. If his own father was Azazel...Elle had not gotten to know the red mutant much during her time with the Brotherhood. But Pietro had always steered her away from him. She could tell he was dangerous. Even as kind as he was while fitting and making her costume Elle also saw the collection of very sharp knives in his room. 

Reaching out a hand she took Kurt’s. “I love you,” she repeated to him for the hundredth time. “Thank you.”

The pressure and warmth of Elle’s hand made Kurt smile. He kissed the back of her hand before nodding. “I love you too...anything I can do to help, I will do.” 

X-men, please meet me in the War Room. The Professor’s voice rang out to the members of the Xmen, Elle, and Lucy. Kurt squeezed her hand. “Off to the War Room we go.” With that, he teleported them, unaware that a certain ex-Brotherhood member had heard the remark.

_____

Next

Fanfic Masterlist

[paulmccartneymybeloved]

this is another I'm gonna talk about my own life post because I don't have anywhere else I can talk about it and I'm seriously struggling atm, if you don't want to read it that is okay I will not be offended :)

I do not know what I wanna do with my life and I am so miserable and I feel like im a failure

I'm failing Uni, I can't seem to get a job, I am so lonely! I do have friends but I feel most of them are the type of friend to do fun stuff with and not the type to sit with me and talk with me as I go through whatever is happening to me rn

I feel hopeless and I'm just so so so so so tired and I don't know what to do anymore

My mother and I had a huge argument earlier and she hasn't apologised and it's insane to have seen her since just being normal and like it didn't happen, it's ruined my day, possibly my week, and she's just happy that she "won" because I ended up sobbing. Good job Mum!!!! Way to go!!!! She wonders why I really wanna move out? It's a mystery!!!! I cannot possibly think of why!

She criticised everything about me.

She was going on about how I hate home and my family, which I mean, I do, but I haven't told her that because I interact with my family as little as possible to prevent these fucking arguments. She thinks I hate it here because I often get irritated with the people in my household, but that just happens when you live with people. I do hate it here but she makes it out that I constantly parade around going 'it's awful here I hate it so much and I hate you all' when I don't, I just sometimes get annoyed with my living situation when not at uni because of how drastic a change it is and I much prefer living nearer to a big city to this rural area that I have to deal with at home - "I don't know why you've come home to be honest" I quite literally had no other choice, but right now, living on the streets of Liverpool seems like it would actually be the better option.

I have expressed that after Uni I would like to move out straight away if possible and I'm continuously having that used against me. Sorry I have plans for after Uni I guess? Sorry I don't wanna live in the middle of fucking nowhere for the rest of my life? Sorry that I actually want to get out into the world after you tried SO desperately to stop me going to Uni at all?

It is so evident that my parents had my sister and I because they wanted children who were the carbon copy of them and now that we aren't, it's a problem!

She's constantly on at me about Uni as if I'm not trying! I am!!! If I didn't care about Uni, I would give up. I am not someone who perseveres unless I actually want to - I quit doing Tae Kwon Do *just* before I got my black belt. I was so close but because I didn't actually want to do it anymore, despite the fact that all I had to do was persevere for a bit longer, I stopped because it was no longer bringing me joy.

I LOVE Uni! I love learning, I love lectures, I love education, I love expanding my knowledge!! I just have a hard time applying what I have learned when it comes to doing so and I keep on getting seen as lazy and not as struggling, when I am struggling, but I feel like im someone who wants to prove I CAN do it despite all of the struggles but it's seeming harder and harder and I feel like if I asked for help from Uni when I haven't up to this point, I'd get made fun of even though I know I wouldn't.

I hate arguing with my mother because she does what my dad thinks he can do. When my dad and I argue, it's meaningless shouting that I pay no attention to. My mum knows what to say to hurt me.

Next, she made fun of the fact that I have that club night that I really enjoy going to. I am a bit obsessed with it, I will admit, but that's because it brings me so much joy. I dont have a tattoo for it for no reason. I feel like I belong there and that people actually enjoy being around me there and it gives me something to look forward to going to in the near future, instead of waiting months for gigs I have tickets to. She said "it's all you care about, it's all you talk about" - a bit yeah. It's the only in real life thing that brings me that much joy. My parents complain when I unhealthily obsess over celebrities, when I was a teenager thye were begging me to go out and talk to people instead of only watching Dan and Phil - I am now obsessed with something that gets me out of the house and being sociable and that gets criticised too.

During the argument we had, any time I said something she had said or done had hurt my feelings, she said, "well it's not like that" or "you've taken that the wrong way" or "I didn't mean it like that". She "knows" and "understands" me and is "willing to listen to and help me" - all she knows about me is that I like Dan and Phil, The Beatles, and the club night that I go to, and any time I've tried to speak to her about anything, it ends up in an argument similar to (but not as intense as the one we had) today.

I said something about my dad and she said she'd speak to him about it and I asked her not to and she said ok she won't, last time that happened where I said something and she said she'd speak to my dad about something and I asked her not to and she said she wouldn't, she lied about doing so!!! She had talked to him!!! and she wonders why I don't fucking tell her anything!!!!

The massive argument we had today started because ive been complaining about my lack of sleep recently, I haven't slept well at all since I got home from Uni. I was getting like 9-12hrs of sleep a night at Uni, here I get 4-6hrs and ive tried cutting down on caffeine, I've tried waking up early with an alarm so that I'm tired in the evening so I go to sleep earlier, I've tried going on walks to physically tire myself out and I just cannot sleep for more than 4-6hrs and it's really taking a toll on me. I was complaining about it and I, of course, was met with my mother saying "well I don't sleep much and I just have to get on with it" and we had a bit of a disagreement but nothing major.

I've started journaling recently, just in a notebook from the shop - nothing fancy with a lock or anything, because I have always really struggled with being sad/angry/upset (probably because negative emotions have always been criticised in this household!) and I'm trying journaling as a way to deal with those emotions in a healthy way - rather than keep those feelings in and get more worked up and more sad/angry/upset as a result of not having an outlet. The minor argument/disagreement about me frustrated with not being able to get decent sleep bothered me enough to journal it, so i started journaling it and my mother said "go on and slag me off in your book". I am being criticised for dealing with how she made me feel, in a healthy way, because she doesn't like the idea of being spoken about negatively. I got the notebook and started journaling for this exact reason, so that rather than unload feelings to a friend, fpr example, I could journal them so that I got them out but also noone else has to know - and I'm still criticised. Whenever she's ever seen/heard me express how I feel about an argument or a disagreement I've had with her, she's always had a problem with it. Am I not allowed to feel?

There is so much tension and anger in this household and I feel like im walking on a tightrope that might snap constantly. There is no physical abuse, I should say for the sake of clarity, I am not in immediate danger - there's just so much that's not spoken about and I feel we all are always avoiding certain topics of conversation because everyone will end up shouting and screaming at eachother at a moments notice.

Moving to Uni where that worry is no longer, to then move back to this, sucks so much.

I have seen what a happy life is for me and for me to be truly happy, I need to move out of my family home for good. I need to. I think people I know think I am exaggerating/miss the independence and freedom of Uni when I say that, but I am so serious when I say I will not ever be truly happy under my parents roof. I cannot live here for longer that I absolutely have to. I am so miserable.