#n oh dear ngl i really like my eyes like. their shape n all but

[noxtivagus]

TODAY WAS FUN 🫶🏼

[storiesoflilies]

i would like to know more about each of your wips please :3 ESP HIRAETH!!!!!! and chef!toji omg :> AND THE TITLE FOR THE GOJO FIC IS SO COOL “heavenly skies, lavender eyes” AHHHHH I WANNA KNOW ABT EVERYTHING LILY!!!! MWAH <3 - @gothsuguru :3

kairo my best darling!!!

you need only ask and i will provide :3

slight spoilers(?) under the cut! also to keep the post short lol.

hiraeth - sooooo, this part of the story is going to be about the readers journey after toji has up and left her. so there’s going to be very obvious angst and pain, but it will focus on her sheer determination and strength to claw herself out of this dark pit that she’s in.

there’s going to be lots n lots of physics and mathematical references which i’m soooo excited about. and thennnn it’ll also be about the friends that help us along the way (cheesy ik but oh welllll), and that said friend is going to be satoru!!! i did a poll sometime ago about what degree he would study at uni, and ALOTTTT of people said physics (i was leaning towards chemistry), which i’m so torn about because i initially wanted him to be different to the reader.

but i think it might be a lovely concept if satoru helps he rediscover her love for physics if he also studied it too. idk what do you think kairo? :3

toji will be making appearances here and there, and we’ll see how a bit of his life has shaped out too. i don’t want to say too much on it though, because i would really like to leave it as a surprise :)

oh, how i adore the taste of love! - the fluffyyyyyy n tooth rottingly sweet piece i’m going to write to soften you guys up before hitting you with the angst of hiraeth heheh :3

lol, all jokes aside, it’s going to be a really nice heartwarming piece. toji is going to be absolutely whipped n lovestruck for our dear waitress!reader, and he’ll fumble in the kitchen which he neverrrrrr does. i originally had the idea submitted under the b section for ‘breakfast in bed’ prompt for io’s flufftober event, and even if she’s not going it anymore, i am going to write it anyways in her honor!!!!

ari also asked about this fic and the satoru one, so keep your eyes peeled for their ask :3

heavenly skies, lavender eyes - sooooo this was an idea i had months ago, but i so adored it and i will definitely get to it after hiraeth! it will be set in the game of thrones universe where the gojo clan are the targaryen’s that conquered westeros.

the title came from the beauty of the sky when flying on the back of a dragon, and then the lavender eyes part comes from targaryen’s traditionally having violet colored eyes in the books!!

ngl i haven’t don’t as much brainstorming as i would have liked on this fic, but i know that the reader will also have a dragon (probably dreamfyre if that means anything to you, idk if you’ve read the books or watched the shows) and will a distant relation to gojo (i’m throwing that out there because ik some people aren’t comfortable with incest, but to have a dragon in game of thrones you must have targaryen blood, so its a bit unavoidable. they will probably be second/third cousins, nothing closer than that. i completely understand if people aren’t comfortable with reading a thing like that though).

i’m planning on the vibes being opulent and whimsy, of a newly crowned king making the big decision of who shall be his wife. i think it would be soooooo juicy if the reader and satoru have been betrothed since they were children, but now that he is king and they haven’t seen each other in yearssssss, will he still honor his oath or not?

it will be a sfw and more fluff piece though, maybe a smidgen of angst from perhaps not so one-sided pining ;)

much love,

Lily xo

[danganronpafan777]

😂 the Bottle Ask one Can you do the Second version with the SDRA Boys let see if Mikado magic could open it *not* and in the end the bottle is open by Iroha

This ask is hilarious ngl

Teruya Otori: 

He smiles, "No problem, Y/n!"

He's a member of the Kisaragi Foundation with hours of special training to apprehend remanants of despair, a soda can should be no issue! 

Except it is. 

Teruya sticks his tongue out in concentration and yanks the lid as hard as he can

Mikado is laughing at him at this point

He's still confused, this man has literally pushed himself to be stronger since he isn't very smart, so why can't he just open this damn thing

When you offer to get Iroha, he thinks you're making fun of him and just sighs, accepting it

When Iroha opens the can without issue, his O-0 face comes out again

Why does this situation feel so familiar-

Yuki Maeda: 

"Huh? O-Oh! Okay, sure." 

He doesn't really have high expectations of opening it if you can't do it, but maybe the training with Shinji will come in handy!

It didn't. 

He struggled for a few minutes before admitting defeat, but then 

"YOU CANT JUST SAY THAAAAT!" Shinji comes along, demanding that Yuki tries until it's open, hyping up his lil bro

After a few more moments of struggling and Yuki beginning to sweat, you decide to put an end to this.

"Um, I can just get Iroha-"

"S-Sorry, Y-Y/n." Shinji says, saying that he didn't realize you were there for some reason and telling Yuki that he wants to die after embarrassing himself in front of a girl / his bro's s/o

"Y-Your embarrassed!? That's my s/o!" Shinji gives Yuki a pat on the back for trying. Just as Shinji leaves, Iroha pops the lid off the bottle without struggle.

"W-What!? H-How did you....!?" 

Yuki feels like he failed you

So you give him some of your soda

Syobai Hashimoto: 

"Sure, for a fee." He states blankly, but chuckles when you glare at him

He takes the can, and is genuinely surprised that he can't open it, but he keeps a neutral face and keeps trying, even bringing out his knife to cut out the top, but even that doesn't work

"Should I ask Iroha?"

"Shut up." He scoffs, thinking you're joking, and moving the cigarette to the side of his mouth to concentrate.

When Iroha easily opens the can, the cigarette straight up falls out of his mouth

How.

Maybe this idiot could be useful after all

Mikado Sannoji: 

"Of course, dear!" His mask makes the happy face ^o

He happily takes it from you, he's the great Mikado Sannoji! 

He tries to pop open the lid, but to his surprise, it doesn't budge, giving his mask a confused shape

He snaps his fingers, trying to take the opportunity to show off some magic trick

No luck 

He summons some fire from him hands and tries to melt it off, since it's literally metal/plastic

The lid stays put

He's dumbfounded at this point, creating a puff of smoke to make it look like he's making a fire, when he's actually looking through the code of the virtual world

It's literally an ordinary soda can, what the hell is the problem

Apparently it's the great soda can 

"Iroha, can you help me open this?" He hears you say

Iroha? The cowardly idiot who can't even commit a murder right?

"Here, Y/n!"

Error

His mind literally can't comprehend this. He mentally goes through every possible scenario and Iroha opening the can shouldn't have been a possibility-

The eye of his mask swirls in confusion

This girl is strong enough to open this obsidian for a soda can but can't commit a goddamn murder to save herself-

Yuri Kagarin: 

"Не волнуйся, Y/n~! I'll get it for you baby!"

He didn't get it. No matter how hard his tiny hands pulls, the lid wouldn't budge

He would rather die than ask a male for help, so he literally resorts to wrestling and biting the can when you're not looking

When you offer to get Iroha, he blindly trusts your judgement, and he'll never doubt a woman's strength, even if she is... he doesn't want to insult a woman either.

He gives it a few more yanks before letting you take it

Iroha opens it with a gentle tug.

"My, Iroha! You've got the strength of a beautiful ox!"

Hajime Makonouchi: 

"Sure thing. Just remember not to have too many of these." He's one, if not the strongest guy here, this shouldn't be a problem in the slightest 

...

...

..maybe this is a bit problematic...

Seriously, he could crush this can on his forehead, or he could squeeze the soda out with his bare hands! 

Why can't he open this!?

He scoffs when you suggest getting Iroha, assuming your making fun of him

He tries to break the soda can in half over his knee, but it also doesn't work

When Iroha opens it with little effort, he has to take off his sunglasses and clean them to make sure he's seeing this correctly

Maybe Iroha actually listened when Hajime told her to eat her vegetables-

Shinji Kasai: 

"O-Okay!" He blushes, still new to the relationship, literally anything could make him red

He gets pretty embarrassed when he can't do it, and kinda pressured since you're staring at him-

"U-Um...s-sorry. I think I need a minute." He doesn't want to admit that he can't do it and mess up your image of him

You get Iroha and he feels even more embarrassed when she pops it off with little issue

You comfort him and lie that it was a prank

You also give him some of your soda 

Nikei Yomiuri:

He wordlessly takes the soda can, expecting to pop it off easily

When it doesn't, he's mildly annoyed, because A. He's using his right hand for this, that's how much he loves you, and B. He's drunken so many of these damn things during all nighters that this should be like opening a door

Spoiler alert: it's not.

He starts shaking it for some reason, and trying to dig his nails into it. He eventually resorts to using his teeth, while you laugh at his slow descent into insanity

He's actually getting mad now-

He rolls his eyes and scoffs when you talk about Iroha helping you. He sneers that she probably doesn't know how a soda can works

Iroha feels a bit sad and offended overhearing that, but she still easily pops the lid off, 

Nikei's face morphs from shock, confusion, and anger in the span of a few seconds as he excused himself to yell about it in his room

You joke about him writing an article about it, but he says there's no way in hell he's publishing a blow to his pride

He can't look at sodas the same for a while

[kybervisions]

midnight at wayne manor [clark]

summary: during a new years party at wayne manor, a drunk reader makes a move on clark. feelings long buried resurface, which leads to a clark breaking up with lois.  

author’s note: i love chaos,, this was just a small and quick idea that popped into my head while working on another clark one-shot,,feel free to send requests!! clark does try to be a good boyfriend to lois buuut......still a soft!clark fic bc im pretty sure he gets manhandled in this??? 

tags: cheating, dry humping, intoxicated!reader, reader is kind of a maneater in this ngl, kinda angsty   

They should have stayed home, that was Clark’s immediate thought upon laying eyes on you. The wind had been knocked out of him and he felt frozen in time as you approached them with a bright smile. Your dress fit your body perfectly, complimenting your shape in a sexy red faux leather mini dress, and then your eyes met. Dazzling and alluring. Clark almost forgot about Lois standing beside him, but she grabbed his arm and dragged him to greet you. 

“Happy New Year!” Lois exclaimed as she went in for a hug. “Your house looks amazing by the way,” 

“Thank you,” You chuckled and hugged Lois. “I didn’t think you’d be coming,” You kissed Lois’s cheek and withdrew from the hug. Clark knew you would go to him next. He knew it was just a friendly greeting, but he couldn’t keep himself composed if your body was wrapped tightly around his. 

So, he extended his arm and went for a handshake.

Clark saw a flash of hurt in your eyes, which you quickly covered with a happy face, and he felt like he had been punched in the gut. 

“Almost didn’t,” Lois laughed. “But our schedule cleared up,”

“Good,” You smiled. “Alfred and I spent too much time planning this for people not to enjoy it,”

“Where’s Bruce?” Clark looked around the room.

“My dear brother has locked himself in his room,” You said rather somberly. Again, the sadness in your eyes impacted him. Clark wanted you to be happy, and he needed to be the reason for putting a smile on your face. “Like a fucking child,”

Lois chuckled nervously, uncomfortable with the turn in the conversation. Clark takes a step closer to you, “Do you want me to talk to him? Try and convince him to come up?” He asked. 

“No...I kinda want you to beat his ass,” You said, and you shared a small smile. “He knows how much this party means to me and doesn’t care enough to show up,”

“I’m going to get some drinks,” Lois said, wanting to leave such a personal conversation. After all, she and you had never been close. You met Lois through Clark, but Lois had written about you long before Clark became Superman. You’ve kept a cordial relationship with her, in the name of team bonding. 

So, Lois quickly exited the scene. 

“I’ll rough him up for you,” Clark chuckled and pushed his glasses up with his index finger.

The sudden alertness in your eyes should have told him not to follow you to the Batcave. When you grabbed his arm and interlocked your fingers with his, he should have pulled away, but he let you lead him deeper into the manor, away from the party. 

Clark turned a corner, and you pushed him against a wall. The attack took him by surprise, but he didn’t fight you off. He felt your lips on his and melted. His mind went fuzzy. All he could focus on was you and the feeling of you against him.

He kissed you back. Desperately. Like you’d disappear and he’d never be able to kiss you again. Clark grabbed your hips and switched your positions — having your back against the wall as he thrust his crotch against your wet core. 

Being so close to you made Clark delirious. He should have stopped it, but instead, he deepened your kiss. He tasted the tequila and weed on your tongue, which reminded him you weren’t in the right state of mind, and that completely shattered this little paradise.

“You’re so warm,” You slurred in a whisper. 

“Y/N, you’re drunk,” He tried to hide his hurt. It wasn’t some confession of love from you. It was something fun for you to do while drunk, which broke his heart.

“Hmhmm,” You nodded. “And high,” You smiled. “Want some?” You tried to kiss him again. He turned his head to avoid your lips touching. 

“We can’t,” Clark struggled to pull himself away from you. 

“Because of Lois?” You asked.

“Oh, god, Lois,” Clark ran his fingers through his hair, panicking at the mention of his girlfriend. “I’m sorry,” He apologized. “I shouldn’t have let you do this,” He looked deeply into your confused eye. 

“You don’t have to apologize, Clark,” You smiled. “I wanted to kiss you,” You took a step toward Clark, closing the space between you. “I want to do a lot more than that,” You added, reaching for his crotch.

“O-oh,” Clark whispered as your hands teased his hardened cock through the dress pants. You kissed his neck, and Clark shut his eyes. “Please, don’t,”

You immediately pulled away.

Clark opened his eyes but didn’t see you standing in front of him. He turned around, looked down the hallway, but saw nothing. Only when he used his enhanced vision did he see you had made it to the Batcave. He looked at his watch, which read 11:38pm and sped down to the cave. 

When he reached the control computer, he could hear you crying. Bruce was holding you and looked at Clark with an angry expression. Your tears were his fault, somehow. Confused, but desperate to make you feel better, Clark approaches you.

“Lotta nerve making a girl cry on her birthday,” Bruce said callously. 

It stung.

“You’re not not guilty either, asshole,” You punched Bruce’s shoulder. 

“Ow, fine, I’ll leave,” He kissed your temple, “Love you, spider-monkey,” You rolled your eyes at the nickname. Bruce shot a death glare at Clark before exiting the Batcave to join the festivities.

Your eye makeup had smeared, with black tears running down your cheeks. You looked a mess, which Clark still found endearing.

“What’s wrong?” He asked in a soft tone. 

“I didn’t think you were coming,” You hiccupped. “Soo I drank a lot really fast,” You continued, almost embarrassed to explain your emotions. “Because I really wanted you here and I felt sad but then you showed up and I got really happy and you look so good right now and I’m really drunk and—” To save you your breath, Clark kissed you.

He moved your hair, cupped your face, and passionately kissed you. He wanted this, you, for so long, Clark didn’t care it would inevitably hurt Lois. 

You shoved him away and tears filled your eyes, “We can’t, remember?” Lois. “I’m such a horrible person,” You began to cry. “I shouldn’t have kissed you, I shouldn’t have done that to Lois,” Your eyes were red and puffy from crying. 

Clark hugged you. He wrapped his arms around your body, tiny in comparison to his stature, and he just held you.

“I look good tonight?” Clark asked after a few seconds of comfortable silence. 

You burst into laughter, and Clark was happy to see you smile again. “Yeah, like a sexy librarian,” Your eyes met.

“How long have —

“I don’t even know when it started,” You answered his unfinished question. “All I know is that I looked at you one day and I wasn’t afraid of it anymore,” 

Right. The unspeakable ‘it’. You’d been so scared of falling in love with your best friend that you patiently watched him date another woman for nearly a year.

“But by then, it was too late,” 

“It’s never too late,” Clark asserted. Despite his relationship with Lois, he didn’t feel at home. He’d never experienced a passion like you. Lois tried her best to keep him happy, but her efforts were pointless. “I love you, Y/N,” He confessed.

“I wanna fuck you so bad,” You blurted out. 

“Dear God, woman,” Clark laughed at your explicit commentary. “I’ll break things off with Lois first, alright? So we can both try and keep some semblance of a conscience,” 

“...tonight?” 

[tj-wrote-things]

Happier

Nikolai Lantsov x fem!Reader

Based on this ask

Broke my own heart writing this ngl anyways enjoy:)

-

-

-

Walking arm in arm with Genya was something you would probably never get tired of. No matter what season, or how busy you were, the two of you would always make time to take a stroll around the grounds, oftentimes in serene silence. The day was perfect, clouds in the sky providing shade from the unforgiving sun, and gentle breeze hitting you two every now and again, just enough to keep you from sweating.

Today though, was one of those days where silence was not provided. Genya had been on a tangent about David, and his unrelenting ability to always come up with the perfect birthday gift.

“It's honestly ridiculous, you know?” Genya spoke animatedly, hands making shapes in front of her. “I slave away in the shops for hours at a time, and here he comes, waltzing in, making my heart explode-” she stopped suddenly to look at you, marching alongside her with hands clasped and a fond smile on your face. “Y/N?”

You were like that, too.

You looked at Genya quickly, “Hmm?” She raised a perfect eyebrow. “I'm listening, “you said, swallowing the forming lump in your throat. “Keep going.” Genya pulled at your elbow, and sat you down, straight in the grass. 

Sitting directly in front of you on her knees, clasping both your hands in her’s, she stared into your eyes. “Tell me what’s wrong,” she prompted. You opened your mouth.

“Nothing’s wrong,” you denied.

Everything’s wrong. You can’t let go, that’s what's wrong.

Genya tilted her head. “Come now, dear, we both know that’s a lie.” It looked like a lightbulb went off in her head suddenly. Though the light in her eye dimmed a little. “Is it Nikolai?”

It wasn't exactly a surprise to you when she figured it out. After all, he was her friend as well as yours. Well, no point in evading now.

“Yes,” you confessed, the familiar lump forming once more. “I just- I used to do that for him. Make him- Make him smile, and laugh, and now-” Genya moved closer when your voice began to break with the weight of your heart. 

“Oh, darling,” she whispered as you leaned your head on her shoulder. 

You cleared your throat and cast your eyes to the lake, where you could see two figures lounging on a blanket. “And now, she’s doing it.” One of the figures threw his head back with a broad smile and loud laugh, painfully familiar golden hair falling over his forehead. 

Genya looked to the lake as well before saying softly. “Her name’s Enid…” You didn’t say anything, prompting her to continue. “She’s sweet, I suppose.” She spoke with a mild hesitance, not wanting to upset you. “She makes him happy, y/n.” You nodded with a sniffle.

“I know,” you said finally. “I want him to be happy, more than anything.” You sat up and dabbed at your eyes with the edge of your sleeve. “But I want to be happy, too.”

Is that really too much for me to ask?

[xiu21chen99]

hxh headcanon/imagine.

again... still about hisoillu but about their engagement instead of illu's influenced fashion choice.

also this is more of... idk it gave reason why they chose to marry instead of uh other ways i guess??

i've seen so many fanarts where illu would break the news to the zoldycks or how killu would react to having hisoka as his brother in law- like srsly it's meme worthy at this point- and lotsa ones that showed how hisoka proposed as a joke or smtg but... I've been overthinking abt it these past few days sO i present to you how i think "the big question aka the proposal" happened... (manga spoilers??)

it's after hisoka resurrected himself obviously, and def after he killed kortopi and shalnark (so he knew there was gonna be empty slots in the spiders' lineup)

i imagine illu went back to the zoldyck estate after the whole fiasco and only heard of hisoka's "death" from rumors while he was on a mission

and then when he was idk maybe contemplating on whether or not he should visit the body(?) to pay respects or something, he gets a text message from the devil himself

their text went like this probably:

hisoka: hey~ where are you right now?♠️ (and no u can't tell me hisoka doesn't text w card suits u just can't-)

illumi: who are you and how did you get the phone you are currently using?

hisoka: ooh~ illu~ i feel betrayed, did you delete my number?♣️

illumi: hisoka is dead

hisoka: *image attached*

illumi: oh

illumi: hello hisoka, how are you still alive?

hisoka: you sound disappointed~♦️

illumi: i kind of am...

hisoka: rude, just tell me where you are♥️

...and that's how they met up?? ngl i think illu has a know-it-all syndrome where he just has to,,, k n o w everything

he's curious so he agrees to the meetup ofc

he's also surprised when he sees hisoka is in good shape when they meet (idk at a bar in an unknown city?)

they drink whiskey on the rocks because... you know...

hisoka explains how he survived and his next plan of action (which is terminate the spiders)

illumi makes a mental note of nen after death bc he's heard and seen it all before but... not to this extent,

this is gonna be,,, bland but i think this is the logic behind why hisoka chose to get married/engaged instead of just paying up front (reference to the ten dons' commission to get chrollo killed and chrollo's commission to get the ten dons killed)--

anyways here's how their conversation goes:

i: "why did you want to talk in person?"

h: "oh y'know, for old times sake."

i: "...right"

hisoka laughs, "okay so maybe i want to ask you for a favor..?"

confused, illumi asks, "why could you not have just texted if you wanted me to kill someone for you?"

h: "no, no- wait, actually, you're not too far off."

i: ~mOrE cOnfUsiOn~ "huh?"

h: "how do contracts for assassination work in your... family business?"

i: "half the promised pay before, the remaining half afterwards. should the target be eliminated by a third party, the assigned zoldyck still gets the pay and should the employer die, then the contract is terminated and the zoldyck will report back immediately."

h: "and has anyone made a contract to have themselves terminated?"

i: "i beg your pardon?"

h: "what complications will arise should your employer's target be... themselves?"

i: "i believe... i have never encountered such circumstance before. the people who hire us are those who have enough money and resource to have their enemies killed quickly. no one's tried to test the zoldyck assassination prowess."

h: "so... how will that work?"

i: "are you implying this is the reason why you have contacted me today?"

h: "yes~ ♥️" (how he said a heart emoji out loud is up to you, reader)

i: "it will be a pointless paradox. logically, the zoldyck will only get the employment bill. and i, myself, do not find pleasure in going for the kill like you lest i get my reward, so you will not get a contract out of me, hisoka."

h: "is there no leeway?"

i: "a zoldyck stands up to their word. so no."

h: "even for a friend?~ ♦️"

i: "we are not friends, hisoka-"

hisoka raises his glass of whiskey along with his eyebrow.

i: "oh..."

h: "didn't you tell dear killua that a zoldyck didn't need friends?"

i: "you... are an associate, someone reliable in the killing world. it's different."

h: "hypocrite"

i: "i ask you for favors and you make me return them. it is not like we spend our time together leisurely like killu with that island boy..."

hisoka clinks their matching glasses of whiskey even though his is already empty, a shit-eating grin on his lips.

i: "you suggested we meet here."

h: "this isn't the first time we went out to drink, right illu?"

i: "regardless!! i will not kill you just for half the money. i do not like wasting efforts on fruitless missions."

h: "as i said, is there no exception, to make sure you get my money if you were to succeed in killing me?"

i: "are you doubting my skill, hisoka?"

h: "that's not the point right now~ ♠️"

i: "wait, why do you want me to get all of your money?"

h: "haven't we just gotten over this subject? because you're my friend, of course."

i: "i... we are not friends, hisoka."

hisoka claps, "that's it! illumi!! ♣️"

i: "eh?"

h: "marry me! that way in our prenup I'll make sure you get all of my money, and even without a prenup you'll still get it since you'll be my only relative! that solves it!"

i: "hisoka, are you sure death did not took a toll on your brain? you did say you used Bungee Gum only on your heart and lungs..."

h: "i'm being serious, illumi!! and doesn't this solve your earlier conflict? we don't have to be friends, we'll be husbands!"

i: "do not use that tactic with me, you manipulative bastard. stop joking."

h: "this is purely beneficial for you, honestly i don't get why you just won't accept it."

i: "then humor me this first, why now?"

h: "dear illu, i've been to literal hell and back. i think it's time to leave my mark in case i fail to escape death again."

i: "was it that bad?"

h: "you'll love it there, illu~ ♥️"

h: "on a more serious note, though, i do plan to marry you. out of everyone i've encountered, you're the most eligible candidate. you're powerful, fully capable and extremely pretty to boot! you're the ideal husband!"

(blushing obviously, illumi downs the remaining whiskey in his glass) i: "death has changed you, hisoka."

h: "so?"

i: "fine."

h: "excellent!"

and in one fell swoop, illumi has a pin against the curve of hisoka's jugular, wrist held tightly by hisoka- a card matching against his own neck.

"not yet, dear husband." hisoka whispered into his ear, "we have to manage the papers first. and i've a request before you do."

they let each other go at the same time, not even breathing an unnecessary breath in the other's personal space (well, they're nearly pressed thigh to thigh anyways, what's the point of personal space anymore-)

"a condition rather than a request, really."

"what?" hisoka orders them refills, and downs his when it arrives.

"join the ryodan first."

glass already pressed on thin lips, illumi's confused hum resonates softly into the concave utensil. "why?"

"so things can get more interesting. i assume you know of the dark continent expedition that's soon to take place?"

"father has advised i take part on it, since kalluto told me the ryodan plans to rob some cliches who'll join the expedition- to look after him. you want me to join them?"

"yes, and i plan to board as well, don't fret."

illumi's eyes turn to slits, "how should i know you would be there? i can't take your word when you might just disappear when we've all boarded."

hisoka grins, wide then wider, "you should know by now illu, i plan to avenge my wounded pride. that damned chrollo didn't even fight me properly."

tilting his head, illumi stared at the man beside him, "is that not contradictory? i thought you did not mind your opponent using whatever means necessary to win?"

"magicians use tricks and misdirection to awe the audience," hisoka says almost thoughtlessly, "chrollo's a narcissistic hypnotist who used the audience as a damned shield because he knew he couldn't handle me face-to-face."

he groans, tinged in regret. "i shouldn't have picked heaven's arena, if i'd chosen a more discreet location then maybe the damage won't be this bad."

"damage?" illumi rests his chin on his palm, facing his husband.

hisoka swipes a hand over his face, and the glamour comes off. the picture he sent illumi now present in front of him. he was missing a nose, his left hand didn't have any finger left and dried blood chipped on his white skin. "oh."

with another swipe, everything's made correct again. hisoka was grinning again. he downs the remaining alcohol and leaves jenny bills under the emptied glass.

"come, lovely husband. we're to elope and legalize our union!"

illumi follows suit after downing his own glass, "i think there might be another loop hole, if you were to join the family. zoldycks do not kill family."

"so if i were to wed you, here and now, you'd think me more of a family than alluka?"

"alluka is not family."

"are those your words, illumi? or silva's?"

"i..."

"wow, you're really just as fucked up as i am."

"where do you plan to take me? i've just said i cannot kill family."

hisoka chuckles, "then you're the one to take my name, of course."

"preposterous!"

"who the hell still uses that word?"

"i am and will always be a zoldyck-"

"exactly. it's just legal papers, if you kill me then you'll just be a widow and even get your name back! see how everything'll work out in the end?"

"hisoka-"

"are you doubting your skill of assassination, my dearest husband?"

"... i better get the most expensive ring in this damned city."

"that's the spirit! now let's go get married!"

"wait, hisoka. what is your last name?"

later that night, when they leave a chapel, something gold glimmers on hisoka's bungee gum/texture surprise ring finger. a matching one around illumi's finger.

unlike hisoka, though, illumi had an extra red glimmer right under that gold, in the dead center of a silver band of intricately designed pattern. hisoka had foregone the traditional diamond in favor of a 16 carat ruby engagement ring, such a curious choice but illumi accepted it all the same...

(much later on, hisoka took both rings as collateral and reminded illumi that he would get them back even if he died bc it was in their damn prenup- and bc it was technically bought under illumis name and that's how hisoka assured illu that he'd be on that black whale,,, bc he had the rings and planned to give them back to him there)

"I thought a red gemstone was better suited for the rather bloody and murderous ending that our relationship will inevitably come to, wouldn't you agree?"

-Hisoka Morow whenever someone mentions his preference of proposal ring...

"I disagree with most of his ideals, our relationship has always had a fragile foundation, and I knew from the start that we'd eventually end up killing each other."

-Illumi Morow, nee Zoldyck when asked about his thoughts on his husband...

[just-another-romantic]

How to Date a Broken God - Chapter Two

Chapter Two: Honest Apologies and a Sparring Match

Series Summary: After too many years of pain, a mortal teaches a god how to feel again. Maybe she can learn from him.

Warnings: ngl (Y/n)’s just rude in this one, language, sad Loki, fighting

That night, Loki threw up. After (Y/n)’s confession, the god quickly excused himself from the room, and barely made it to his bathroom before puking up everything he had within the past century. He hadn’t been ill since he was a child, and here he was: knelt over on the cold tile, head in the toilet bowl and clammy hands holding on for dear life.

Last time he had been ill like this, his mother had scooped him up in her arms - despite his protests - and tucked him into her bed, pulling the silk blanket up to his chin. He tried to recall how her hands stroked his hair in comfort as he pushed a stray lock from his face.

He was sick at himself. The once vain god now looked in the mirror and hated the face that stared back at him. He hated his heritage, Odin’s lies and abuse that lasted centuries, and he hated the spiral the truth threw him into once it was unveiled. He hated Thanos with his mind control, that he was weak enough to fall into it - costing thousands of innocent lives, including that poor girl’s parents.

Loki let out an audible groan of anguish, his head dropping lay on his land clutched to the toilet bowl. He hated her...well, not exactly. He hated how his heart twisted at the mere mention of her name. How his heart burst at the melody of her voice or, Odin forbid, her laugh. How she was not a normal mortal, that she stood her ground and held a knife to his neck the second he dared test her. He hated that in every aspect, (Y/n) was what Loki wanted in a lover.

She could never love you, he remembered. You’re a murderer, a cold-blooded killer. A monster, like the world...like your own father and brother think of you. Who would ever want to hold your crimson-stained hands?

Shakily, the unbreakable god stood up from the bathroom floor, quick to splash water in his face in attempt to refresh himself. He looked into the mirror and a monster looked back at him. If asked, he would deny it, but that night Loki fell asleep with tears running down his cheeks.

The morning wasn’t any better. An awkward heavy air still lingered above the Avenger’s heads, leftover from last night. Loki entered the kitchen nook of the floor around seven, grey sweatpants hanging dangerously low on his hips and maroon t-shirt contrasting against his pale complexion. The golden rays of the still-rising sun fled into the room, enveloping the god in what one could only describe as a halo. Of course, Loki was tired and disoriented from sleep; the only thing he felt like was disheveled. No one noticed the beauty of the waking deity, no one except (Y/n), who promptly choked on her hot coffee.

Bucky was laid out on the sofa, the morning news drowning out his soft snores. James Rhodes sat at the dining table, a book in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other. Sat on the ground by the television, Peter started on a new Lego set of the Avengers Tower, mumbling about the minor mistakes there were in the tiny architecture. Loki was worried he’d convince Pepper to sue the company.

“Good morning, Sleeping Beauty,” Sam called from the barstool, cup of coffee in hand. His eyes traveled from Loki, to Wanda and the pans of scrambled and fried eggs and the pot of boiled eggs, then the pile of bacon next to her. “I hope you like eggs. Don’t really know what you guys eat on different planets.”

Loki stifled a yawn. “I’ll get myself a bagel. But, Birdbrain, yes, we have eggs on Asgard. I just don't eat them.”

“Oh my god is he vegan?” came Peter’s small voice.

Loki chose not to respond to that question and only walked into the kitchen in search of the toasters. He found them pretty quickly, (Y/n)’s small form serving as a landmark. She looked snug and smug, giving Loki the once over as she sipped her coffee, her feet dangling from where she sat on the counter. She looked innocent enough, cozy and clad in sweatpants and an oversized Star Wars shirt, and though she was barefooted, Loki had no doubt she was hiding another dagger somewhere.

“Good morning,” she chirped sweetly. “Don’t worry, I don’t have another dagger on me.”

Well, there’s one question answered. He gave her a smile in greeting. There was a bit of a pause before she raised her eyebrows as in ‘Aren’t you getting something?’ to which Loki quickly grabbed the bagels from the breadbasket.

After putting the two slices into the rack, he found himself suddenly interested in his cuticles, while it had been a bad habit he picked up when he was only a child- that constantly got him ratted out by his mother for it. The once suave god that had women falling at his feet lost his tongue in the presence of a mortal girl. “(Y/n)-”he began, before getting cut off.

“Don’t. I know what you’re gonna say.” He gave her an inquisitive look, to which she only rolled her eyes. “The air’s still heavy from last night.”

Loki felt his cheeks heat up. “(Y/n)...I give you my sincerest apology. And I’m well aware that a simple ‘I’m sorry’ isn’t even close enough to covering it.”

She shrugged. “I loved them. Still do, with every ounce of myself. My parent’s were my best friends. But you know what they always taught me?” Her burning stare locked with his. “That there’s two sides to every story, and even the monster thinks he’s the hero.”

Her voiced echoed monster in his ears and left an impact in his gut. “I’m sorry darling but I’m not seeing your stance on this...are you offering forgiveness?” His mouth dried up and he found himself unable to speak more than one sentence. He couldn’t even think.

(Y/n) scoffed, swinging down from her perch on the marble. “Oh no. Not even close.” She stepped uncomfortably close and Loki was intimidated, though she barely came up to his nose. “No. I hate you,” she seethed.

His stomach rolled in his belly at the venom in her voice, the words she spewed stinging like hellfire. 

“But I will never wish you bad intentions. Like they always say, ‘keep your friends close but your enemies closer’.” She flashed him an innocent smile, the façade immediately building back up. “We’re teammates, we have to at least tolerate each other.” Tolerate. Enemy. “And for the record, don’t call me ‘darling’, darling.”

Loki gulped, feeling as though his throat had filled with cement, stepped down from his stance with her, and quickly grabbed his food before retreating to his room without another word.

Throughout the entirety of (Y/n)’s accusations, the newest Agent's voice had grown tremendously in volume, drawing the attention of the rest of the room’s occupants. There was a sweet moment of silence and (Y/n) turned to enjoy her coffee in peace, but Sam was too blunt for a Saturday morning.

“Don’t you think that was a bit...I dunno...harsh?”

“If it was, I don’t care.”

“You should,” said Bucky from the coach, his face stony and serious. “It’s how the whole Civil War ordeal started.”

“That’s completely different,” she snapped. “They had their reasons, Stark was being ignorant to the truth, as always it seems-”

Coronel Rhodes’ voice boomed through the kitchen, “Hey!”

(Y/n)’s head turned as the silence fell over the room. Rhodey’s eyes narrowed in on her. “I suggest you watch yourself, little lady,” he said. “You are the new comer, you have absolutely no right to waltz in and talk bad about the man who saved the universe, saving your ass as well.”

“Loki killed my mother in cold blood! My brother! My sisters and my father! And I had to watch!”

“Stark’s weapons killed my family, sweets,” spoke Wanda, seemingly appearing out of thin air. Her slender fingers interwove with the agent’s own, soothing and warm. “And I forgave him. In a matter of weeks.”

“He had no control of who used his weapons, Wandie.”

“I killed his parents,” mentioned Bucky. “He forgave me.”

“You were brainwashed!”

Rhodey leaned against the counter, arms crossing and face stern. “Loki was too.”

Agent (Y/L/n) felt her heart drop at a sickening speed. “He was...what?”

“It was all a part of Thano’s mastermind plan or some bullshit,” explained the Falcon. “He sent people to collect all of the infinity stones, but that ended up going south and he took it into his own hands. One of them being Loki.” Sam’s brown eyes fell to the ground in a silence, and the extremity of the situation hit the girl like a truck. “He found him, floating out there in the depths of the universe, took him, and convinced him to go on a killing spree. Basically.”

(Y/n)’s mind was going a million miles an hour and everyone in the room could practically see the wheels turning in her head. All the blame, all of the hurt, she had cast onto the wrong man. Her voice was shaky and breaking, “So...my parent’s death was - was that raisin’s doing?”

“Thanos killed millions before the Blip,” said Bucky gently.

Tears pricked at her eyes. “Jesus, I really am an asshole, aren’t I?”

Rhodey laughed, clapping a hand on her shoulder. “You have a few things to learn before we put you on the field, that’s for sure. Gotta control those anger issues, but I think we can whip you into shape pretty quick.

------------

And boy, did they whip her alright.

Hesitantly, (Y/n) agreed to beginning her training early on Sunday, instead of waiting for the work week to start. First, it was a three-mile run with Sam and Bucky around the compound at the crack of dawn, nothing she hadn’t done before or couldn’t handle. After breakfast, there was weights with Rhodey, then yoga with Wanda. Thankfully, she caught a break with Banner in the lab in between sessions, talking about the design of her new suit and how the tech that she didn’t understand would work. Now, she laid flat on her back, thrown for the fifth time in a round of sparring with Bucky.

“C’mon doll,” he taunted in his Brooklyn drawl, “get your butt up. Or do you need help? Do I need to phone 911?”

“For an old man, you sure do know how to talk shit, Granny.”

His black brow quirked in amusement. “That was the best you could come up with?”

Shakily, the agent denied the hand he offered and pushed herself up again, resuming the fighting stance. “I’ll work on it.”

The brunette supersoldier smiled at her, wiping the minimal sweat off himself with a towel. “Don’t worry, doll. I’m giving ya someone that’s more so your size this round.” He called off behind his shoulder and low and behold, Loki took his place on the mat, looking unpleased.

The first thing he said was the simple, “I didn’t sign up for this.”

“I doubt you would,” she replied, masking her nerves with a stern voice. She shot a glare at Bucky, who sat off to the side with a grin that could beat the Chesire Cat’s. “’I’m pairing you with someone more your size,’ he said! ‘It’ll be fun,’ he said! Bullshit, Buchanan!”

“He’s your size!”

“He’s a god!” (Y/n) looked the mischief maker up and down. He was scrawnier than his blond brother, but his stance and build clearly stated he’d be a difficult opponent. He stood a good half-a-foot above her head, and she doubted her own strength could outmatch his.

“If you haven’t noticed,” Barnes began matter-of-factly, “Loki isn’t built the same as Thor. He’s less jacked and smaller.” Loki’s muttering was heard but disregarded. “However, he’s still one of the strongest of the universe.”

“Then why the hell are you putting me with him if he could squash me between his fingers? I’m human.”

“Yesterday morning, you seemed to be out for his blood, I’m giving you what you wanted.”

Heated shame crept up (Y/n)’s chest and face and Loki’s smirk rendered her speechless.

Bucky ignored her redness, continuing, “He uses his brain, his cunning, his agility, and his speed. Along with his magic, he become’s a dealy combination. You could learn a lot from him, which is exactly why I’m pairing you with him. But for a fair fight, no magic.”

“You’re no fun, Sargent,” the god complained.

“Unless (Y/n) has a trick up her sleeve, no magic.”

Loki looked at her with hopeful eyes, to which she only shrugged. “I only know party tricks. Sorry.”

The mix-matched pair stepped onto the mat, both hesitant. The moment Bucky’s voice rang “Start!” throughout the room, (Y/n) swung a punch, that was quickly deflected and brought behind her back. His body pressed against hers, heat and electricity in-between the two bodies. The agent writhed, brining her elbow hard into this side, then looping her legs around his own.

“That’s it, (Y/n)!” Bucky praised, and (Y/n)’s face flushed under the compliment and the god’s mighty stare. The applause fueling her, she had Loki down a moment later, sitting on his upper thighs, her own straddling his waist. His arms were pinned helplessly against the floor; she smirked.

Loki’s eyes were blown wide, breath heavy, but he smiled back. “You okay there, Silvertongue?” (Y/n) cooed sweetly. She had won.

“Loki,” Bucky called from behind the ropes, “quit holding back!” and the agent’s blood ran cold.

Instantly, her back slapped against the mat, the positions now reversed. Pinned, despite how hard she struggled and fought against his strength. Loki’s eyes locked with hers and her breath caught in the base of her throat, mouth running dry. 

“Never better, petal,” the god answered, whisper of breath crossing her face. The heat left her body as he got up, grabbed his duffle bag, and exited the gym.

(Y/n) sat on the floor, heaving and images of the bluest eyes flashing through her mind. 

AUTHORS NOTE

Holy shit. The first month of 2020 has been kicking my ass. Lord help us all. I’m so sorry for the wait, guys. I hope I can make it up to yall.

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