#neo-negative-generation

[neogenic-artum]

why am i the patterns minority. i am truly so so so bad at drawing patterns sorry

[neonational]

new brush test ft. ivan braginsky

[bloodyselfshipping]

wanted to draw myself soemthing since its my birthday tomorow. and that makes me very sad. billy and my self insert be upon ye

[negative-generation]

⋆⋅☆neo-negative-generation hub ☆⋅⋆

: ̗̀➛ hai my name is neo/viktor/maksim im a transmasc 2spirit 18 yr old and i use he/him pronouns. im a native american-american and i speak english + russian. irl im a vintage punk and a commie fag.

IMPORTANT TAGS: #video, #audio, #save for later, #cat tag, #warner core, #major grom, #arcane, #portal, #fallout, hackers 1995 (#hackers), #seinfeld, #matthew lillard, #9/11, #bullet train, #the man from uncle, house md (#house), #blade, #james acaster

please block these if they make you uncomfortable! also just ask for things to be tagged :3

DNI: zionists, terfs / radfems, bigots, exclusionists, anti he/him lesbians, anti-agere, anti-selfshipping, anti-kink, capitalists, racist assholes, pro-ana, pro-loli / map individuals, generally ppl who suck, anti-hetalia, hazbin hotel/vivziepop fans, anti-ai, ppl who arent gonna respect boundaries lol

BLOGS: i have many sideblogs. here they are.

🛍️ @communist-splatoon - politics, splatoon

🔮@woodsboro-generation - horror movies

📽️ @neonational - anime and cute stuff

🖊️ @sl1-incident - misc aesthetic

🍭 @neo-imperial - star wars

🧜‍♀️ @trans-edward-nashton - batman

🎡 @marshmallowghostmen - ghostbusters

🦠 @bloodyselfshipping - selfshipping

🎉 @generational-atrophy - fanfic / writing

🪼 @killshot-mantell - star wars ocs

☔ @xxxbugaboo1990xxx - 90s ocs

👽 @never-made-it-to-his-20s - au ocs

🍇 @neogenic-artum - art blog

[sl1-incident]

its a crazy fucked up world

my name is maksim, im a 2spirit minor , im transmasc, gay, and use he/him pronouns , also im a communist vintage punk , and i love to make friends (: sometimes.

IMPORTANT TAGS: #punk, #vintage, #web, #cute, #aes, #fandom, #horror, #stim

DNI: punk exclusionists / gatekeepers, zionists, bigots, exclusionists in general, anti he/him lesbians, anti-agere, anti-selfshipping, anti-kink, capitalists, racist assholes, generally ppl who suck

[woodsboro-generation]

i like boys, ok?

my name is viktor , im a 2spirit minor , im transmasc, gay, and use he/him pronouns , also im a communist vintage punk , and i love to make friends (:

IMPORTANT TAGS: resident evil (#re,) #reanimator, #evil dead, #scream, suburban gothic (#sub goth,) #aesthetic, #carrie, what we do in the shadows (#wwdits,) #walten files, #american psycho, #hitcher

please block these if they make you uncomfortable! also just ask for things to be tagged :3

DNI: zionists, bigots, exclusionists, anti he/him lesbians, anti-agere, anti-selfshipping, anti-kink, capitalists, racist assholes, generally ppl who suck

[neo-imperial]

girl what is star wars even about

my name is neo, im a 2spirit minor , im transmasc, gay, and use he/him pronouns , also im a communist vintage punk , and i love to make friends (:

I POST: thrawn trilogy stuff (eli vanto specifically,) the acolyte (rip,) andor, sequel trilogy content, occasionally some original trilogy stuff, general star wars meta

DNI: 40 year old men who think star wars is too "woke", zionists, bigots, exclusionists, anti he/him lesbians, anti-agere, anti-selfshipping, anti-kink, capitalists, racist assholes, generally ppl who suck

[communist-splatoon]

i just really dont like bo burham

lakota / dakota (american indian) - transmasc but not a man (he/him) - marxist leninist with less of the marx - minor (call me woomy!)

genocide apologists / deniers, i block on sight. typical dni applies. eng / рус

[ajaxbell]

Fangs of Fortune (Bai Ze Ling): perfect on pure aesthetics alone, but also it will tear your heart out while being very gay.

I was lured in to this show by Tumblr gifsets and friends on Bluesky talking about how queer and poly this show is. I'm old and I've been in fandom more than half my life. I know how to read queer subtext. I'm also pretty well versed in cdramas, so again, I know how to read subtext. So I went into this ready to, well, read the subtext.

But no this show is just puts the queer it right there in the text. The vague information we have about Chinese censorship repeatedly left me asking, 'wait how are they getting away with this?' Like some of these jokes and implications are just so blatant it seems incredible this show ever made it to being broadcast. It just feels very much like queer media made for queer people even if t's more subtle than something western like Queer as Folk.

Even without the heavy coloring of gay this show is incredible and so much more than I expected from the title and the promo. The premise is essentially the death of the goddess, who governed relations between humans and demons, leads to an influx of demons in the human world. This brings together the goddess's disciple, Wen Xiao--seeking to restore the goddess's power. WX's childhood sweetheart, Zhuo Yichen--seeking to restore the demon-hunting bureau after the powerful demon Zhu Yan killed his father and brother. It opens on Zhu Yan, in human disguise as as Zhao Yuanzhou, volunteering to help the imperial court restore the demon-hunting bureau to quell the chaos. They are joined by Pei Sijing, a retired female general from the rival demon hunting sect, and a very young doctor (and comic relief) named Bai Jiu. It starts off as a sort of monster-of-the-week with a grim Scooby gang doing detective work and fighting monsters. Each major demon has a mini arc that relates to the larger case (restoring the power of the goddess to balance the realms), and they are repeatedly blocked by either the demons or the rival demon hunting sect. Each mini arc also acts as a mirror or parallel story to slowly revealed backstory of all the main characters as well. In true cdrama fashion it's a mix of adventure, intense emotional drama, romance, and comedy. And queer and poly jokes and romance. It also has a kind of manga vibe in the way the comedy is woven into the more serious story, and in the fantastical depiction of the characters and how the story unfolds.

It is also just insanely beautiful. Every single shot is lovely. The costumes, make up, and hair are incredible. The casting director made all the major demons inhumanly beautiful. The sets are spectacular. The effects are nicely done. Every bit of has the vague surreality of a fairytale. The perfection of each shot ads to the manga vibe, as if we're seeing each critical storytelling panel come alive. There's recurring water-based special effects that are just gorgeous. Based on aesthetics alone this show would be worth watching to me. That it is combined with a complex, very emotional story is a spectacular gift to the watcher. A lot of the negative reviews of this complain about the staginess or that it's overly contrived in how each scene is shot. But I think it's gorgeous, works perfectly with the storytelling, and if we criticize art on whether it achieves the goal it intended then this show is doing exactly and perfectly what it means to do and doing it beautifully.

Additionally the acting is also very good, but Neo Hou is the stand out for sure. I enjoyed him in Back from the Brink, especially the later part of the story, but in Fangs of Fortune he's transformed, utterly embodying the role, the way Dylan Wang is Dongfang Qingcang in Love Between Fairy and Devil. Neo Hou has the right look, a slightly uncanny beauty perfect for a gorgeous immortal not of this world. The show does incredible things with his styling between the various looks and personas the role requires. But in acting he somehow manages to utterly transform his face and demeanor to manifest each aspect of the character as story demands changes from him.

There is a lot of crying in this drama. Like early on I joked that there was going to be a character crying a single perfect tear in every ep. Lol nope. Multiple single perfect tears per ep and many outright full on sobbing scenes. This show is just waiting to rip your heart out and you see it right from the beginning. But it was such sweet pain all the way through. Just a truly engaging and utterly wrenching set of intertwined stories.

My only criticism is that the pacing falls apart in the last 3 episodes. But overall the story is solid through the end, though like so many cdramas, it's saved by the epilogue.

You should absolutely watch it if you want the chaotic bi polycule (it's her, her girlfriend, her boyfriend, her boyfriend's boyfriend who is also her boyfriend, their two idiot sons, and her boyfriend's ex-who is also eventually sort of his boyfriend again), or if you want your heart torn out and stomped on. Or even if you just like really gorgeous cinematic things. Also if you watch, please don't skip the ending credits, as they change as the arcs change, and the radiant joy Tian Jiarui has as he dances is an excellent antidote to the emotions of each episode.

[narcjsistx]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍 𝐏𝐇𝐀𝐒𝐄𝐒 | OS

shidou ryusei x fem reader ; words: 6.7k (6723)

plot: if there's something you love it's the relationship you have with charles, the little player of PxG. one thing you hate is shidou ryusei, the stupidest boy in the entire universe. the positive negative thing is that charles literally considers you and shidou his parents

extra: spoiler from U-20 and NEL arcs, read at your own risk!! jk, but don't read if you don't want big spoilers, and don't complain to me

✶ 𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ; take a look, trust me!

——— FIRST

"Could you be more precise in your throw? The ball goes where it's supposed to go, but you know that a mistake of even a millimeter can make it end up with the opponent. I want you to be precise" you say sitting comfortably on your bench, legs crossed, pen in hand and a notebook resting on your knees "How exactly? Do I have to go like, wah wah and then booosh?" the boy says, sprinting across the field, moving in a way that only he understands perfectly, but that you're now more or less starting to understand "Exactly. I want more mobility from you"

Charles nods "Okay, ma mère!" he says laughing, then goes back to his training. You roll your eyes pretending to be annoyed, but you can't suppress the little smile that appears on your lips: he's been using this nickname for months now, at first it was weird, but now it almost feels strange if he calls you by your name, your real name. It's just that little by little you've become fond of the idea of playing an almost maternal role for Charles, who is actually only a few years younger than you

"Yoo! Where's my favorite boy?" says someone you recognize by their usual shrill tone of voice

Oh, and here's Charles' father figure

What a shitty choice

"Shidou!" the boy shouts running towards the blond, who ruffles his hair as soon as they get close "Usual boring training?" he asks, and you watch them from afar annoyed. You know that Shidou asks this because he knows that you are almost always the one training the ftench genius, except for the rare times Loki does it. Shidou knows you're here, otherwise he wouldn't have looked at you and smiled that usual smile he does because he knows it annoys you

"I wouldn't say boring. I improved a few things with my coach" he says, and you like how Charles defends you in front of that parasite "Improved with Y/n? Then she blinded you too with those same old training sessions..." he says, even seeming sorry for the boy "Training is stupid, all you need is practice on the field" Shidou says starting to run towards the ball, which has remained further away from them. Charles chases him, and between them begins a 1vs1 that leaves you space to hate Shidou in your thoughts

You hate how sure of himself he is, how he always wants to prove himself better than you in front of Charles and everyone in general. You simply hate Ryusei Shidou, but you have to live with the idea that the little blond only listens to you and him in the whole Blue Lock, if not sometimes even Julian Loki. The last match of the Neo Genesis League was about to start, and in a few days PxG would face Bastard Munchen, who you knew were in a bit of a critical situation due to their players. Being on par with Anri in terms of organisation, it was up to you and her to manage the training sessions that Ego administered to the players, and as a result you knew practically everything that was going on in the teams, although you had to remain impartial due to your more present commitment to the french team. You were originally supposed to end up as Chigiri's assistant coach at Manshine City, but at the last minute you asked to coach Charles, and the role was given to you straight away. Charles was not in the Blue Lock training system, he came from a french city whose name you only sometimes remembered. He would not stay here in Japan, at the end of the NEL he would leave like all the other foreign players. Your heart ached a little thinking about it, but you wanted to make him strong first and then think about the separation

When you had the recording videos of the foreign players in hand, he had immediately caught your attention. After a few training sessions together he had already started to trust you: Charles was a child, but you had 9 younger brothers at home who had always given you problems, so managing him was like walking on already studied ground

You weren't sure how Charles had come to hear only you and the other two boys, but you didn't care so much actually. The ball lands a few meters from where you're sitting, and Shidou immediately arrives and picks it up, running back into the middle of the field, but not before staring at you for a few seconds. Here comes the parasite

Shidou had been in the Blue Lock since the beginning of the project, or at least, something like that. During the match against U-20 he had played alongside Sae Itoshi, thus appearing as an enemy. But there was much more underneath

At the beginning of the project, you and Shidou were actually friends, if that's what you could call the relationship. You were the practical part of Ego and Anri, the only one who watched the games on the bench and not through a screen like them. You liked your role, as you liked exchanging a few words with the players. In the end, you had become a bit of a friend to everyone, the only girl in a myriad of boys who only had soccer and food on their minds. And when you say friend to everyone, Ryusei also falls into this category

You joked, you rooted for him, and he rooted for you when you were called up by Ego after some little mistake you made. It happened that he would spend hours and hours on the field just to talk to you while he kicked the ball; if he had some free time after training, he would ask you to get some pink dye and redo the color in his hair. It was a strange relationship, damn strange, but beautiful in your opinion. At least that was before he was muzzled into silence, tied up in a room for Rin Itoshi's safety. You knew he was deadly, but on the one hand you thought, and still think, Ego's behavior was a little excessive. And so Shidou had been "bought" by the prodigy, moved to the U-20 team and brought back to the Blue Lock only at the start of the Neo Genesis League. And from that moment, everything had changed

The first few days after his return you tried to talk to him, thinking that everything was the same as before, but he seemed to be the same but far from you. And so, gradually, you started to hate him and he started to love your annoyed face because of him. And here you are again, trying to ignore the part where you were deeply disappointed when you heard he was leaving for another team. But you preferred that to be ignored, at least by you and the entire world

“ATTENTION!” Charles shouts, and before you know it, the ball lands in your face, knocking you off the bench. You lay there confused for a few seconds, before you see the boy in your field of vision, followed by the blond who doesn't even try to hide his laughter "Maybe the throw was a little crooked, Shidou" says the french kid, looking up at the other "If that's the result, the throw was perfect!" he says laughing. You stay on the floor, this time sitting up while you rub your aching head while listening to the bullshit Shudou says

"Oh no, ma mère, are you going to die?" Charles says smiling at you, and even though you're still in pain you can't help but laugh a little at his comment "I don't think so, Charles. I'd rather someone else die" you say looking up, and immediately the little one starts laughing, but it's not the same for Ryusei, who looks down at you "I guess you're the funny one in your family" he says with a raised eyebrow "Oh trust me, I am. I don't think I can say the same about you. Months after you've been here, you still suck at making people laugh" you say, and the child's laughter becomes louder as Shidou unexpectedly offers you a hand to stand up. You were confused "Huh?" you mutter "I may not be funny, but I'm still a gentleman" he says, and from the tone of his voice it sounds damn sure. You stare at his hand for a while, before deciding that sooner or later you'll have to get up off the ground if you don't want to stay here forever. You're about to grab his hand when he removes it, putting both of them in the pockets of his track pants as he starts walking towards the exit of the infield "I'm kidding. Not that I care about manners so suddenly"

"Oh, fuck you bastard!" you say, getting up from the ground by yourself, while he has already made his way to the exit. You hear him laugh at your comment, as he raises his hand, still with his back to you, waving it "See you, family!" he says in a friendly tone, and this only makes your blood boil even more in your veins

"Mère and Dad are arguing" Charles says, looking at you amused with the usual sharp tooth sticking out of his mouth. You turn to him with a huff, picking up your notebook on the floor before going back to sit on the bench "Let's continue"

——— SECOND

"You should seriously stop eating this crap" you tell the boy, whose mouth is completely full of the pink substance "It's not my problem if you don't like it" he says, continuing to gorge on inordinate amounts of the dessert. The cafeteria is almost completely empty, except for a few other boys from PxG who are sitting in silence eating. Charles always eats sweets before going to sleep, and for a few days now he's been obsessed with a strawberry jelly of who knows what off brand. You take a sip of your tea, ignoring the kid who continues to dirty his tray. It's almost 10pm and you're tired too, today has been a particularly tiring day due to your commitments: between various training sessions and Ego who asked you at least ten times to clean the team's locker room, you've had little time to rest. And you were so damn sleepy, but you knew Charles would keep you awake even past the time he was, technically, supposed to go to his dorm to rest

As the minutes pass, the cafeteria empties. Now there are only you and the boy left, who is on his third helping of his dessert

"I think that's enough" you say taking the container from his hands, throwing it in the bin at the side of your table. You see Charles's face go white, as if you had just told him he can't play soccer "What did you just do?!" he says in shock, moving to put a hand in the bin, probably to get the rest of the portion. You look at him disgusted, taking it from his shirt to lift it up "Take that thing back and I swear tomorrow I'll ask Loki to let you train with him for a whole week"

"You really wouldn't do that. You love me too much, right ma mère?"

"I have to educate you like a mother too, don't I?"

"LEAVE ME ALONE" the kid says kicking, and you let him go because of your tiredness. You watch him tiredly as he runs towards the exit of the cafeteria, rubbing your eyes from tiredness "Charles, come back here-" you say walking towards his direction, but are surprised when you hear someone fall. You walk towards the corridor, where you see Charles on the ground and, in front of him, Shidou on the ground too

With a hint of surprise you notice how, unlike always, Shidou's hair is down instead of straight up. Blonde and pink locks fall over his face, and looking further down you notice that he, like Charles, is not wearing his usual uniform, replaced instead by a gray tank top and blue pajama pants, provided by the Blue Lock. You can't say he's not a good looking, but that's not exactly the context in which you would say that

"Ooouch" the boy says, rubbing his head, probably in pain "Oh! Shidou?" he continues, noticing the boy "I was just looking for you" the boy says, then looks up at you, smiling cheekily "You always have your mommy with you, huh?"

You glare at him, bending down to Charles' height "You okay?" you ask, and he nods "I'd be better off with the pudding still in my hands" he says, and you snort in his face, making him laugh. Shidou looks at you confused, tilting his head "What do you mean?" he asks curiously, and as much as you don't want to explain, Charles is the one who immediately takes care of answering him "She threw a whole pudding in the trash!" he says offended, and you pull his ear "It wasn't a whole pudding, there were barely two spoonfuls left to finish it! And besides, it's not good for you to eat it" you say as if to scold him, and this time too the french kid laughs. Shidou watches you, getting back on your feet and then offering a hand to Charles to get back on his feet. He offers his hand to you too, but you avoid being teased this time too and get up on your own

"You mean the pink shit Ego always puts next to the cutlery?" the boy asks, putting his hands in his pockets. Charles nods frantically "That. You've tried it too, right? It's damn good, in France we don't have-" he says, but Shidou cuts him off "That sucks" he says in a disgusted tone, making you raise your face because you wouldn't have expected a sign of collaboration

"See? If Shidou tells you that too, you should really let that shit go" you say, nodding, ruffling the boy's hair "If you say so..." he says, now defeated. You laugh internally at seeing him so saddened by something like that, but you notice how Ryusei is also holding back a laugh

Your eyes meet for a few seconds, and soon neither of you can help but laugh. Charles looks at you in confusion as you laugh, but then suddenly a genius seems to pass through his mind, "You guys are getting along great!" he says emotionally, probably because of seeing you almost always insult each other. You immediately stop laughing, tugging on his ear again “Don’t talk nonsense. Now go to sleep!” you say, and he grumbles a bit before heading off to his dorm

You and Shidou remain in the empty hallway. You look down, while he has no qualms about staring at you brazenly: typical of him, he has never felt ashamed of anything, and you don't think he'll ever start. You stare at the floor for a bit too long, to the point of looking up "You were looking for Charles earlier, weren't you?" you ask crossing your arms. He seems to think about it "Yeah. But I don't think I need it anymore" he says, but the way he says it makes you curious "What did you need?" you ask, and he puts a hand on the back of his neck "I usually ask Karasu to help me dry my hair, but he went to practice. I wanted to ask Charles but he went to sleep, from what I understand" he says

Why are you thinking what you're thinking. What the fuck is going on with you to even think about asking him?. You should seriously visit a specialist, because it is impossible that just seeing him like this has given you all this courage, so much so that it overshadows the hatred you feel for him

"What if I helped you?"

——— THIRD

You shake your hand through the boy's hair, trying to see where it's still wet. The pink strands seem more faded now that they're in front of you, and you wonder when the last time he got his signature pink color was. You don't even know how you ended up in this situation, even though you explicitly asked to help him

Maybe you missed the feeling of being close to him, but admitting it would be like a defeat for yourself. So, inside, you say that it was just a kind act in a moment of kindness. And then, Shidou is surely going through a moment of simple kindness too: according to your reasoning, he should hate you too. This is just a moment of pause between the two of you, and when you're done, everything will be the same as before: just people who can't stand each other, linked by Charles exclusively as divorced parents

"Aren't you tired?" he asks, after a long time of being silent; tired? You could literally lie down on the floor right now and fall asleep immediately "No. I'm not" you say, because admitting it would be like handing him the fact that you have a limit on a silver platter. He chuckles to himself, but you don't bother asking yourself why: after all, he's Shidou, he does a lot of things for no reason behind it. The sound of the hair dryer echoes in the boy's room for a while longer, until you feel his hair finally dry. You indulge a little in touching it, because it is definitely softer than you ever imagined. Shidou gets up from the chair, walks towards the mirror and you watch him as he touches his hair, perhaps to check it. Next to his bed you notice a hair gel lotion, probably used for the usual hairstyle. "The pink streaks have faded a bit" you say, looking at him from a distance. This time it's you who speaks, and he turns to look at you for a few seconds, then looks at himself in the mirror again "I know"

You don't know why, but asking him seems like you've opened a conversation that you have to conclude. It's strange, because you have this impression with him since he was moved to the opposing team

"Aren't you going to get your hair colored again? Aren't you going to ask Anri for the dye?" you ask, getting closer, but you immediately stop, still keeping a little distance "I haven't gotten my hair colored in a while, maybe since before the game against Blue Lock"

Your heart skips a beat. If it's like he says, he hasn't had his hair dyed since you stopped doing it. It had become a habit of yours, after all

"I see" you stammer, suddenly feeling cramped in the large room "I think I'll go to my room" you say, and you scurry toward the exit door. Your cheeks are itchy with redness, and damn, why did you suddenly have this fucking reaction? He probably didn't do it again because he's busy with NEL games, you should consider yourself less important in other people's lives.

You walk down the empty hallway towards your room, when you hear Shidou pop out of his door again "Hey" he says, and you stop without turning around "What?" you ask "Do you like more my hair down or up?" he asks

"Down" you say

"I get it. See you, mother of the child"

Damn, he hadn't lost a bit of that side he knew made your knees weak. Fuck you, Shidou Ryusei

——— FOURTH

The folder in your hands is probably begging for mercy because of how tightly you're gripping it. NEL games always excite you, but watching the two current strongest teams clash is almost legendary. PxG has finally found a worthy opponent, who is giving them quite a few problems despite having some complete geniuses in their team: Rin Itoshi, Charles, Karasu Tabito... and, as much as I hated to admit it, Shidou himself was one of the strongest

"Are you sure the current formation is okay? Having Itoshi Rin so far forward could be a disadvantage for the defense" you say without taking your eyes off the game. Loki shakes his head, sitting next to you "The further back that boy is, the better. He must become a monster" he says confidently, and you can only accept his words and stay silent. The typical passages between Charles and Shidou begin, and from afar you can't help but admire them: even though they met for the first time months ago, they had a really efficient chemical reaction, something that not even other players have managed to have with the other external players

From a distance, they really do seem to have a relationship that goes beyond trust. Maybe not quite father and son, but more like older brother and younger brother. But by now, the idea of Shidou being Charles' father figure is so ingrained in your mind that the boy himself admits it from time to time. On the one hand, however, you are happy that the person who chose the blond is Ryusei. He is wild, loud, and outspoken. Charles is the same, and he needed someone who could understand him besides you, who however played more of a role in calming him down when he was at his best. If you and Shidou weren't in such a strange relationship, maybe you could have all spent more time together with Charles

The ball goes up in the air, Raichi Jingo of Bastard Munchen jumps to catch it. Shidou does the same, ending up bumping forehead to forehead with the other player. They both fall to the ground, and you immediately understand what is about to happen. Damn, him and his temper

"Don't even try" you say, walking briskly into the field. Shidou with an annoyed face has just gotten up from the ground, and from the way he moves you understand that he wants to grab Raichi by the collar and probably punch him. He notices you when you get closer, moving his hands away from where they were about to go, at the boy's neck "Huh?" he asks perplexed, as if he doesn't know

You don't even know why you're doing it, but when you heard the referee's whistle you relived a scene you've already seen. The last time something like this happened Shidou ended up playing against Blue Lock, and your relationship was ruined. It's like watching a movie on loop, but this time you want to change it

"If you punch him you'll get a red card, and you'll be lock off. Think about it, because I don't think you want to be" you say with a serious face, but with a hint of masked pity "You know too that you are at risk here, please don't make the same mistake from months ago" you say, and he seems seriously in difficulty in front of your words

"Why do you do this?" he asks, and you can't help but feel a little awkward. You don't want to tell him you're doing it because it would hurt to see him go away from you again, because you would still have to pretend to hate him even though you know you don't, and that it's just a way of putting it into practice because of his behavior since he came back, which has made you feel bad

"Because the team needs you. You have to stay here" you say, masking your words. Shidou sighs, looks at you, Raichi, then back at you; he walks away, returning to his starting position. You breathe a sigh of relief, and as you walk back to the bench you hear the whistle that signals the continuation of the match

You walk for a nanosecond next to Charles, who doesn't even look at you; but his words reach straight to your ears

"Evidently only ma mère can handle that demon"

——— FIFTH

The boy's calm breathing makes you smile almost spontaneously: seeing Charles so calm is strange, but satisfying. The little thread of drool that stains the pillow makes the scene even more tender than it already is, and your heart hurts a little to think that these are the last hours you spend with him. Because yes, tomorrow Charles will leave

The match ended with the teams drawing, which made both teams the two strongest in the NEL, which officially, has ended. From tomorrow the Blue Lock boys will have 6 weeks off and the foreign players will return home, to their countries so far away. Charles will return to France, to his home, with his real mother and his real father

From tomorrow, you will no longer have the usual annoying blond who calls you for everything, who always seeks your attention, who loves to be chased by you, who only listens to you, or almost. From tomorrow, the corridors of the french section will no longer have the laughter of the members and the smell of their bodies. From tomorrow, one of the most important chapters of your life will close

"Look, you can go to your room if you're sleepy. I don't think you can talk to Charles anymore even if you wanted to" says Shidou, sitting on the bed next to the blond boy "Don't worry" you say

Sitting on the boy's bed, you gently caress his head. After the game he specifically asked to spend the evening with both you and Shidou, and unable to refuse, you ended up in his dorm to spend the last hours with him. You had dinner together with some street food that you had brought from outside, making the boy happy

There is an awkward silence between you, while Charles snores lightly. Today's scene is still between you, which seems like yet another thing you have to conclude between you but which remains suspended in the air, like everything

Between you, everything started but never ended. You had started a relationship that never reached a decisive point because of his move to the U-20 team. You had started to have too much confidence between you, compared to everyone else. You had started, or rather, you had started, to believe that maybe with Ryusei it wasn't just friendship. But none of this was concluded, without a definitive answer

“Fuck” you say, your thoughts feeling a little too heavy for a moment like this, which should be focused solely on the fact that Charles won’t be here soon. You almost casually run your hand over your cheeks, finding them wet. Why? What?

"What the fuck is going on?" Shidou asks from the other bed, looking at your tears that haven't gone unnoticed. You look up, then look down almost immediately. You remain silent, even though you can still feel the tears silently falling

“I asked you what the fuck is going on” the boy asks again, getting up from the bed to sit on the floor next to Charles’ bed, his face inches from your knees. You don’t dare say anything, continuing to text the boy’s head as if you weren’t crying. It's just that everything that revolves around your relationship now seems to weigh more than it has in the past few months

“You say that like you care" you say proudly, sniffling as you glance over Charles’ sleeping face. “What’s wrong with you?” he huffs, resting his cheek against your knee “Don’t you think I should say it? Oh no, you rightly don’t give a shit. I don’t think you’ve ever actually cared, so I don’t see why you should start now all of a sudden” you roll your eyes, and for the first time you find yourself seriously explaining to him what’s been on your mind since this whole situation began

"I seriously don't know what's wrong with you, since I left you've become a different person" Shidou says sighing, and just hearing him speak makes you want to bang his head against the wall until he bleeds: how stupid must he be to not have understood that you're like this because of him?. Where is the Shidou who was always explosive with you but with a touch more affection than the others? What happened to the one you thought you seriously had a crush on?

Where did go the Shidou Ryusei you knew?

"Shit, I really don't know why I'm reacting like this. It's something I'm used to now and maybe thinking that tomorrow Charles will leave I've become more sensitive..." you say laughing sarcastically, even though you still have tears on your cheeks. The blond doesn't answer, continuing to remain a few inches from your leg while the only noise is the light snoring of the boy. "Can I ask you something?" the boy suddenly says, and you look at him a little perplexed. You nod. After all, they will be the same things you have already heard, the same ones he repeats to you so as not to make the strange situation between the two of you seem so obvious

"Can you talk to me honestly for a minute? Really, I need to know what's going on in your mind. I have my own thoughts, but I don't know yours" he says in one breath "because, let's be clear, we both know we don't talk to each other like we used to" he says, resting his mind on your knee, closing the distance that had been separating you for a few minutes now. You swallow a lump of saliva that is more bitter than usual, sighing and not knowing if you really want to talk

But you have to try. It's a 50-50 job, after all

"It's just... damn, I don't even know how to explain it to you in normal terms, because I don't even know how to explain it to myself. I just know that at some point you took another path and I continued on mine, but evidently you lack that path, because you've changed... changed too much, you're not the one I knew, or at least to me. You're still Shidou Ryusei to everyone in the Blue Lock, but to me? Why do we seem like two strangers, if you never treated me like a stranger before the match with the U-20?"

And finally, a part of your heart seems to have the ability to talk to the person directly concerned about everything that has been going through your mind for months. You speak, and each word seems to come out lighter than the last. Shidou looks at you, not daring to interrupt. He looks straight into your eyes, his pinks clashing with yours; it’s a gesture you’ve done a million times before, but why does it seem more human now? Maybe because you’re talking about something important again after months of silence?

"I think it was a situation mainly generated by the rivalry, well it's obvious, you remain a Blue Lock staffer and at the time I was a striker of an enemy team" says Shidou, his calm tone betrayed by a hint of uncertainty "It was natural to do what I did when I came back. On the field it's different, they can't judge me for my personality, but with you I don't kick a ball, and that's the problem" he admits, his gaze now focused on Charles "A problem?" you ask, widening your eyes, a little perplexed by his words "It's a problem. I don't care if that fanatic Rin Itoshi calls me 'bastard' during a game, or if Karasu doesn't pass me the ball in an assist, we're on the field. There's not always a field under my feet, especially when I'm talking to you who are like a bomb that's about to explode, because of me" he continue the conversation, and you start to connect some pieces of the puzzle that is slowly being put before your eyes

Maybe the situation is really deeper than you expected from someone like him. Maybe there really is something that was done by him just for a sensible reason, but just maybe

"What are you trying to tell me?" you say directly, and you see him laugh, almost sarcastically "Oh no, I won't say that out loud. Forget it" he says. "Ryusei, please" you say, practically begging him, and his resolve seems to waver "Shit, what am I supposed to tell you, what do I care what you think of me? That I seriously had a problem with how you were going to judge me after I came back from the match? Do you understand now?"

You would like to ask him to repeat the words, saying that you didn't understand them well, but you would be lying. His words, clear and strong, have arrived so directly in your ears that you suspect he is lying, because he is absolutely not the type to say things like that. Shidou Ryusei basically admitted that he cared about your judgment? He, who has nothing in the world to care about but himself?. "Oh" you just say, not finding the right words to say what you think, because it's too much even for you who are used to having discussions like that. Shidou looks at you, and noticing your embarrassment he lets out a light laugh "Oh? Oh, okay. Continue to pretend that I haven't practically exposed the most intimate part of myself to you" he says tilting his head, resting his cheek on your thigh

"No! It's just- shit, it's more complex than I could have imagined" you say, running a hand through your hair, trying to calm yourself. You hear a light chuckle coming from the boy's direction "I'll pretend to understand. I just need to know that you hate me a little less now, or at least I hope so" he says confidently, and this time it's you who interrupts him "It's not that I hate you, I don't think I ever have actually. It's just that being pushed into a corner hurt more than it should have" you admit, feeling a little embarrassed to tell him so freely. This time he is the one who is left speechless, even though he tries to maintain the usual facade of calm. You look at each other, maybe for minutes; it seems as if, slowly, everything is having a logical thread that was missing for both of you to understand the situation completely

"Honestly, I don't want to give Charles divorced parents" Shidou says, and you laugh lightly at his joke, mentally thanking him for at least trying to make the situation lighter. "I don't think he ever had them. All parents fight" you say, returning your gaze to Charles, in the dream world; out of the corner of your eye you notice how Shidou is looking at him too, and by doing so you really do seem like a family. "Yeah. All parents fight" he repeats, and the silence that is created between you this time is decidedly less tense

"They fight because they love each other" Shidou adds, and you're a little taken aback by his statement, even though it sounds so damn innocent. But like this, in the situation you're in, he doesn't exactly play an innocent role. You sigh, moving your hand through his hair, caressing it a little uncertainly "Yeah. Because they love each other. In a way only of friendship, at least in our case" add a little hasty, while still feeling your heart beating in a way that is decidedly not just about friendship. What is this boy doing to you?

"No. Because they love each other, stop"

——— SIXTH

The already soaked handkerchief remains tightly held in your hands, yet you do everything you can not to cry in front of the boy, who for his part is completely calm if not just a little sorry "Don't do that, come on! Don't do that, ma mère" says Charles pulling your already wet cheeks "Stop it. Let me be the childish one between us for once" you say pulling him to you, trapping him in a hug while he continues to laugh. The bus is slowly filling up with all the french members, who will be returning to France in a few hours. You hug Charles, so tightly that it probably takes his breath away. You've grown so fond of him, and thinking that he won't be here this afternoon makes your heart ache. He's really become like your baby, in one way or another

"You don't have to go away and pretend you never met me, okay? You have my number and call me whenever you want, even if it's just to explain what you did in training or to tell me stupid things" you say putting your hands on his shoulders, faces facing each other. You see him nod, smiling "I get it. But you will pay the phone fee for calls overseas" he says, and you roll your eyes pretending to be annoyed, then hug him again. He has to leave, you know that I'm actually already late, but you're waiting. You wait, because you know that Shidou also wants to say goodbye to him. But where the fuck is he?

You look around, and only after a few seconds you feel someone touch your shoulder. You jump, but you see the blond at your side, one arm around your shoulders and one on the kid's shoulders, holding you close "Were you thinking of leaving without saying goodbye to your family?" he says sarcastically, and they both burst out laughing while you look at them smiling, wiping away a tear

"But really, Charles. No matter what, you have me, Shidou, you have us. You're still our little pain in the ass, but we love you" you tell the boy, and you see him smile genuinely for the first time. He nods, scratching his chubby cheek "I know, ma mère. I have a home in France as well as here in Japan, with you two. Don't tell me things I already know" he says, making you laugh. You all look at each other, and the weight of detachment seems to be a little lighter knowing that he knows he always has the two of you. You look at Charles, who suddenly turns towards Shidou "You promised me something. Do it" he says, and you look at them confused "Huh?" you say, but Shidou ignores you and looks at Charles "You'll be the first to know, don't worry about that, kiddo"

Julian Loki calls Charles. You hug for the last time, this time all together, and you say goodbye to him as he gets on the bus, trying to hold back the tears that start to fall spontaneously when the bus finally leaves. He's gone. Charles is gone

With your face even more full of tears you use the handkerchief, but it no longer has any effect. You notice later that Shidou's arm is still around your shoulders, as you walk back into the Blue Lock facility. But it's a nice feeling, with this sadness. You walk until you reach the corridor that separates the street of your room from that of the boys' dormitories, who will also leave the facility this afternoon to finally have some free time. You only now realize that you won't see Shidou for a while, just now that you have clarified

You stop, but you don't let go

“So...” he begins, keeping the hype high “Do you have anything to do on your weeks off?”

"No. I'm free practically every day"

"I think you have every day busy from now, until you get back here. Busy with me"

——— SEVENTH

— Charles, your mother is officially back with me. I'll tell you more when you get back here, but just know that I kept my promise to tell her how I feel about her. We miss you, kiddo — 18:09

delivered, not yet read

— I have to say that she kisses well too — 18:09

delivered, not yet read

[neogenic-artum]

forgot to post this! i originally drew it in early august, and i guess. it just. slipped my mind. anyway

[neonational]

kill the part of you that cringes

my name is arseniy, im a 2spirit minor , im transmasc, gay, and use he/him pronouns , also im a communist vintage punk , and i love to make friends (:

IMPORTANT TAGS: #miku, #hetalia, #izutsumi, ace attorney (#aa,) mob psycho (#mp,) bungo stray dogs (#bsd,) #russia (hetalia,) #america (hetalia,) #rusame (hetalia,) #saiki k, #bsd, sailor moon (#sm)

please block these if they make you uncomfortable! also just ask for things to be tagged :3

DNI: anti hetalia, zionists, bigots, exclusionists, anti he/him lesbians, anti-agere, anti-selfshipping, anti-kink, capitalists, racist assholes, generally ppl who suck

[thatsatricky1]

𝐍𝐞𝐰𝐛𝐢𝐞 | Lee Jeno Smau

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Lee Jeno x F Reader.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Angst?, Cursing, Suggestive, more to be added lol.

𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞𝐬: University au, spin on fight club au, social media au; smau, written parts, angst, fluff, slow burn, humour, (one sided) enemies to lovers, hidden identities.

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7

𝐑𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐍𝐞𝐨 𝐓𝐞𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲 𝐂𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐮𝐬:

1. Only grades acceptable are B+ and above.

2. Negative and derogatory wording about Neo is strictly forbidden.

3. Uniforms must be worn exactly as shown in the uniform guide with no alterations.

4. Tardiness won’t be tolerated, there is no excuse for being late.

5. No Female and Male contact is permitted, only during contact sports or circus in circumstances with granted permission.

6. All homework, assignments, projects and school activities must be completed by the set timeline and are compulsory.

7. No outside help is allowed, this includes outside tutors and Ai programs, on campus tutors will be provided with a fee.

If these rules are not upheld, there will be strict consequences such as suspension and/or expulsion. One or more rules could lead to an immediate expulsion if decided by the faculty.

These are the strict guidelines Neo university students must follow without question or backlash through their years at Neo Technology. Failure to comply with said guidelines never ends peacefully. Many students end up leaving Neo Technology in their earlier years in their majors and courses due to Burn out or expulsions.

Those who manage to go through to graduation in their majors/degrees are always guaranteed a good future, having this university campus on one's resume/Cv is an automatic ticket into high end jobs. Previously graduated students have been seen working in higher up positions in multiple different areas. There hasn’t been a recorded failure on Neo Technologies graduated classes so far.

Many students fill out the same requirements that go to Neo Technology, Wealthy family backgrounds, academically well adjusted and above average in multiple areas shown through their previous education and lastly well connected individuals with higher up contacts. With one outlier.

The one student with a scholarship that is picked out every year. AKA the charity case to make the university look fair. However this scholarship is given to a first year, every year in all majors, whether they make it through to graduation is their own hardship. Those who drop or or get expelled will be replaced with a new student in that year they dropped out.

Due to unseen and unfortunate events a scholarship student in their graduation year passed away from ‘natural’ causes, meaning a new scholarship student would be taking their place in the graduating class of 2024 in the business major area and courses.

Many outsiders condemn Neo Technology for their strict ruling and how faintly it seemed to act more like a high school then university due to its strict regulations rather than the relaxed ruling one mostly knows from being a university student on campus. However words and thoughts do nothing to change how Neo Technology continues to move forward with its education agenda.

𝐑𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐅𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐂𝐥𝐮𝐛:

1. You don’t talk about Fight Club.

2. You do NOT talk about Fight club.

3. If someone says “Stop” or goes limp, taps out, the fight is over.

4. Only two people, to a fight.

5. No Shirts, No shoes.

6. Fights will go on as long as they have to.

7. If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight.

Those were the rules, you don’t follow them you’re out and that doesn’t just mean a simple blacklisting. Fight Club was built from the ground up by people in their 40’s trying to have some excitement brought back into their mundane lives. Though of course as time progressed the younger generations started pouring in to the point the average ages seen in Fight Club were now no longer 40’s but between 20’s-40’s.

If you happen to be an unfortunate soul who wanders into Fight Club, there’s no point in saying be prepared because no newbie is. It doesn’t matter if it's your first and last day there. Rule number Seven always happens. If it’s your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight. It’s not a choice, it's a must.

Profiles 1 | Profiles 2 | Extra

1. All men =🚩

2. Why she kinda 🫦

3. Freak 🫵

4. Homie hopping

5. Hot privileges revoked

6. I got you bbg 💳

7. Neo T student.

More chapters to come…

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: (Comment,message or submit a request to be added to this taglist.)

Oml first smau finally being done 👀 took me forever to decide to actually do it lol, let’s hope this will actually be good 😭 (constructive feedback is always appreciated so if you have any memo’s or notes feel free to tell me!)

Also a little sneak peak into the boys in this one here you go:

[goomyloid]

I think a lot about a version of the pacifist route Spamton fight where Kris goes down there with just Noelle instead and has the same post-battle freak out and Noelle being the one to notice/ask if they’re okay. And how she would react to the strained Yes vs yelled No. Especially knowing how she's so determined to figure out what's up with Kris in the weird route, I think it's interesting if she has the same attention to detail and desire to understand what's happening to Kris in the pacifist route.

ok my jaw kinda dropped open reading this. i have honestly never thought of this before and now im going Crazy. oh my gourd i reeeeeally hope someday in the future we get to face a secret boss with noelle…. it would be so awesomes

there is a real difference between how kris acts around noelle vs. how they act around ralsei and susie… because the latter two are ‘newer’ friends with less complicated history i feel as though they’re more straightforward and open around them in a sense. like theyre Able to bring themself to yell NO because they know in the back of their head that both susie and ralsei will try to comfort kris in their own ways. along with that, i guess it’s because of susie’s insistence on finding out if kris is okay or not that they managed to ask them if they were ok at all. basically, its multiple cases of less people holding back on various things…

i personally imagine it being kind of different for noelle. she Thinks a lot of things without actually saying them. she probably wouldn’t stop everything to question that just happened with spamton neo, and if she were to ask kris if they were ok, it would be more based on a gut feeling that something is really wrong more than anything else, if that makes sense… the way kris is friends with noelle is different than how they’re friends with susie. theyre almost less straightforward with noelle, with their idea of bonding being silly pranks and messing with her (stuff kris wouldnt do to susie lol). i wonder if they’d be able to be honest about how they felt like how they were with susie and ralsei, or if it’d turn into them hiding how they feel even more… (something something It’s hard for noelle to get a straightforward answer from kris in general)

noelle being concerned about what’s “happening” to kris in the main route feels difficult, maybe just because it’s so amplified negatively in the weird route, but at this point in time, most people seem to be interpreting kris’s more social behavior as a good thing… when something actually appears to be Wrong for the first time (kris freaking out after spamton neo), susie has no good benchmark of what kris was really like before, and ralsei is being Ralsei-ish about it… if kris were to have the same reaction in front of noelle after all, i think it would deeply disturb her way more than any other character. personally i just dont think kris is the Yelling Type, like at all, so for noelle to hear that from them for the first time (or maybe she’s heard kris yell before in a really bad situation, which then might let her know just how Bad this all is) it would probably really surprise her, and kris would probably regret shouting as a result… not a funny prank

just in general i think kris has a weird combination of like, wanting someone to Notice that something’s different, but also pushing people away out of fear and desire for solitude (and again this applies more so to noelle specifically). like in the main route, it might be easier to believe that things working out for everyone this way is just Better, no one else needs to worry about the Weird Fucking Thing controlling them, they can handle this on their own… until they cant. general desire to not burden others if at all possible. ALL OF THIS IS TO SAY noelle would Really have to lock in and pry at kris a little bit in order to find out that they are “not them” because in the main route where things Aren’t bad, that desperation from the soul doing fuck all in the weird route isnt there anymore

ok im gonna end the post here… your scenario activated a lot of neurons i never even knew i had

[snowleopardcrk]

more symbolism!!!

ah yes, more Midnight Lily, a silverbell cameo and two Moonflower doodles. AU by @cuppajj

For Moonflowers story, we have her main conflict with her father, Saint Vanilla Cookie. But what about Midnight Lily Cookie, her mother? To give a little context for whats coming up, Moonflowers story theming around the Saint where Moonflower symbolizes the Moon, which includes the Solar Eclipse to contrast the Saints light themed imagery. Plus Moonflowers additional and more religious theming being based on the Spirit of Apostasy.

It is abundantly clear that Midnight Lily is an enabler of the other Neo Beasts, while to some extent understandable as she is the weakest of the Neo Beasts (she has long crossed the line of it being acceptable).

To compliment well with the general religious theming, I did additional research into the role of a mother in the lens of the Bible. 'the mother is one who "binds" the family together, holding them together individually and collectively through her love and actions' Despite how broken the family is, the only remaining connection that Moonflower has with the Saint IS Midnight Lily. And in return, she does care for her daughter and the Saint at some level. Yet, she does nothing to genuinely mend what has been broken (no one is, Moonflower is afraid of her father and the Saint is so delusional that he believes that this is the best course of action to save everyone). This fits her pattern of enabling and being generally passive to the world around her, for the most part.

Another aspect that I have neglected to mention is her slow-burn of a plan, she seeks by the end to have the others at least playing by her rules, but also not liking when her children do things she does not like. This is now territory where I do a lot of guess work and personal thoughts n' research so this is very much subject to change if anymore gets revealed.

How I have understood the few tidbits we get about the Beast of Sovereignty, she is an enabler and insecure about being the weakest. And I think her insecurity in some way, even if unintentional may reflect on her relationships where she is the one in power. In general, she is fine with her kids, generally passive until they get too unruly. At that point, she will remind them with harsh words who the mother is. I'd like to note quickly, she will NEVER get physical. She only uses WORDS. It is also important to note that she does wish for her child to understand where she is coming from. She is an enabler because she holds little power over the beasts, but in dynamics where she is the one in power, this side vanishes for the most part. Despite valuing sovereignty I believe she still wants to retain some level of control so Cookies don't do things she does not like. This is generally in line with how leadership generally operate, they don't care when you're doing smth positive, but when it turns negative, that's when it starts turning sour.

As for the actual arc of Midnight Lily and Moonflower, I have a general framing but it is difficult to make something as substantial as the one she has with Saint Vanilla. Gotta wait until I get more lore and story for the gal. But in short, it is a conflict of the two trying to make each other understand their respective sides. With Moonflower trying to save her mother, her only remaining parental figure from being a beast- while Midnight Lily seeks to make Moonflower truly understand her side and hopefully have Moonflower join her permanently.

Heres other tidbits for Moonflower and her relationship with the Creme Republic. For her ventures to the Silver Kingdom are actually secret. She is a very powerful and talented magic user (similar to her parents), so her travelling long distances quickly is very possible. Moonflower is already an outcast in the Republic, it is well known who her parents are. And Cookies keep their distance, there are very few Cookies who come and check in her. Its mostly some scientists who are researching the neo beasts (espresso, maybe, depends on his condition in this au), Clotted Cream Cookie, GingerBrave, Financer (sort of, she tags along the Consul) and depending on the direction of the story, Madelaine Cookie(I will start really brewing something here once more stuff comes out~). She stays isolated in her lab in the undercity, she never comes out, and when she does, she hides her face and just retrieves things like food or research material. It is normal for her to not talk with anyone for well over a week with nothing but a single lost Raisin Crow to keep her company. I'd like to note that this raisin crow is now an albino, and Black Raisin tasked Moonflower to take care of it since it was bullied and ousted by the other raisin crows (I took inspo from the myth, but it is generally agreed that white color corvids are subordinate to the colored ones).

But she is also an outcast in the silver kingdom, despite being Midnight Lilys kid (its a well known fact), she has gotten into disagreements with their monarch and isn't the upmost loyal member- she has a strong stigma around her. Silverbell Cookie does take pity on Moonflower.

That's all for now. I'm gonna lay down, I've done so much research...I silently weep at the thought of fully showing the complexity of the three in full force.

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Dictionary of Esoteric Terminology

for your next poem/story (pt. 3)

Esoteric—designed for or understood by the specially initiated alone; may refer to the occult

Athame - a ritual dagger used in Witchcraft and Neo-paganism; has a black handle which is inscribed with symbols

Brahmarandhra - the "Gate of Purity"; a spot at the top of the head described as a hidden aperture; according to some, this spot is the exit for the enlightened soul upon the death of the body

Cromlech - a circle made of vertical stones, associated with Celtic worship of the Sun

Dark night of the soul - a phrase used by St. John of the Cross to describe the depression, isolation, and alienation which afflicts some mystics just prior to the realization of transcendence; hence the saying, "It is always darkest before the dawn"

Dracontia - many temples and sacred sites have been associated with dragons, probably because of their connection with primeval earth forces

Dweller on the threshold - a hostile spirit or being peculiar to each individual, comprised of the accumulated "bad karma" of that individual; such a being could be thought of as the personification of all that holds the seeker back from enlightenment; in this sense, it is like a negative Holy Guardian Angel

Ecstasy - "to cause to stand out"; a state beyond or outside reason and rationality; speaking in tongues may be thought of as an ecstatic trance

Flying ointments - lotion or cremes used to facilitate astral or etheric projection. These mixtures usually contain potent psychedelic agents such as belladonna, henbane, and mandrake

Genii - in Islamic tradition, they are an intermediate race of spirits between angels and people, who ruled the earth before Adam; also known as djinn, genn, or ginn

Hsuan te - virtue through emptiness; the cultivation of one's original nature

I shin den shin - "from my soul to your soul"; direct transmission without words

Khu - literally "clear" or "luminous"; the ancient Egyptian word for the immortal part of the soul; the causal body; symbolized by a plume of flame

Left-hand path - defined by some as the path of black magic; others, as the paths which stress doing and action over being and stillness; most magic systems tend towards the left hand path; most religions tend towards the right-hand path

Lustration - from Latin lustratus, "to brighten"; a ritual purification using water; rituals involving baptism or holy water are examples

Menstruum - an alchemical term for that from which all metals are derived; also mercury wherein gold is dissolved; "Our Water is a fire and a salt. This fire is the true Universal Menstruum of Vegetables, stronger than the fire of wood, since it transmutes the physical gold into a spirit."

Nagas - serpent spirits in Hindu mythology who lived in vast and beautiful temples and palaces beneath the earth

Ouroboros - the snake devouring its own tail; a Gnostic and alchemical symbol of cyclical nature, eternity, or the transcendence of duality; sometimes also used to symbolize the world of illusion

Phoenix - a mythical bird of incredible beauty; is the only one of its kind, living in the deepest desert, until at the end of its 500-year span it dies and is consumed in the funeral pyre of its own nest, then it rises from the ashes in the freshness of youth; generally considered to be a symbol of resurrection, immortality, and spiritual transformation

Prasad - the practice of offering sweets, fruit, or other food to a saint or deity

Pretas - the "hungry ghosts" of Buddhist and Hindu mythology; the ghosts of those who died burdened with great desire and are generally considered to be malevolent; supposedly they are continuously thirsty and hungry, but are unable to eat or drink; described as having huge distended bellies and pencil thin necks

Ruach - breath, wind, or spirit; represents the part of the soul which is the rational mind and the powers of reason; also refers to God's ineffable soul which He breathed into man at creation, thus making man in His image

Secret fire - an alchemical term for the hidden or elemental Fire

Simulacrum - an image used in sympathetic (imitative) magic that is considered to be the magical double of the thing represented; a "voodoo doll" would be an example of a crude simulacrum; in ancient Egypt, simulacra of slaves, animals, and other possibly helpful beings were entombed with their deceased owner; also used by some to describe the visualized vehicle or "body of light" used in astral projection

Speculum - any light refracting or shiny surface which can provide a focus for the attention; mirrors, bowls of water, and crystal balls have all been commonly used as speculi

Theurgy - from the Greek words theos, "god," and ergon, "work"; magic used to grow closer to God or become more godlike, to make changes for personal evolution and spiritual growth; the sacrament of the host could be considered a form of theurgy

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