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#new thing that i revolve my life around
n-copper9 · 25 days
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my autism found Ramshackle and it latched onto it like a small dog
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purpurrock · 4 months
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WHY THE FUCK DOES SCOTT PILGRIM KEEP FOLLOWING ME EVERYWHERE
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soupkiddo · 3 months
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tried to put myself in the headspace of a transphobe and got pissed off cus it's so fucking stupid
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waywardsalt · 3 months
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Can you please tell more about your redeemed Bellum that hangs around with the main cast in post-canon? Or, like, your hum!Bellum ideas in general?
Ooooh, I have a lot I could say about Bellum. I'll go a bit off this ask and just talk about him in the context of post-ph and some other aus, since he's fun and because most of them share the common thread of him being in human form often. This will probably be messy, but I'll divide it into sections to force myself to stick to one topic at once to keep this from devolving into what might as well be a transcript of a discord dms infodump.
(there should be a keep reading just under here- there are a few thousand words under the cut- if it's lower than it should be then idk, even while drafting this i had issues with it moving further down than i put it)
Human Bellum Basics (mostly design stuff)
It's less of a human Bellum au sort of thing, and more like a design for what if Bellum had a human form that he could change into. Kind of like Oshus having his human form while actually being a whale, it's the idea that Bellum can switch between his human form and his demon form at will, and I have spent... way, way too long trying to figure out this design.
I can't quite remember why I decided to give Bellum a human form (could've been anything from doing it for the hell of it to for shipping purposes) and it took AGES to decide on his final design.
Describing it would take a few paragraphs, so there's art! Commission pieces by @roskii specifically, he's great, he did great, check him out. (i dont know how to make these smaller :)))))) enjoy)
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Half of it is directly taken from his demon design, he keeps the tentacles (not always present, he manifests them at will and tend to have much less reach when he's human), his eye, his teeth, his hair color (kind of), and half of it is more... brought in by ideas related to Bellum in general, with some vague references to that demon design; specifically him being scarred all over is a mixture of the idea of him as a violent and almost warlike creature, while also vaguely referencing the markings on his demon body (in the earliest drawing I ever did of a human Bellum design, he did just straight-up have those markings. That picture no longer exists, I'm sure).
As a basic reference, I suppose, in the second image, the character to the right of Bellum (Damien Fletcher) is an oc of mine, and therefore a character I designed (totally worth mentioning tho that with both Damien and Bellum while I did technically design them and gave roskii my notes for how they look, he also took some small liberties with their designs and... ugh theyre great im keeping them), so those two could provide some insight to my character design sensibilities, even if they're just a small fraction of the (mental) character designs I have.
Bellum is made up of pieces of his canonical design, pieces that I think make sense considering what we know about him, and just pieces of other character designs. He has more or less the same haircut as Joker/the protagonist from Persona 5. His hair has been like that for a while, but seeing Joker's hair helped me figure out specifically what I wanted.
It's been... hard, trying to give him a humanoid design, I've seen a bunch of other human Bellum designs, looked at other Zelda characters with both human and inhuman forms, took inspiration for what I could do and how and what parts could be carried over. His hair is easy to explain, it literally is meant to look like he does as a demon. Easy. It is absolutely directly inspired by that bitch from Tokyo Ghoul. I'm not looking up the character name I don't care about Tokyo Ghoul.
I keep him having sharp teeth, I've transposed those markings on his bodies as being scars (which I'll elaborate a little more on later), kept his eye and that he only has one main eye (there is nothing under the eyepatch. It's just smooth. If you've seen The Goonies, it's like what's going on with One-Eyed Willy. That's probably where I got it from tbh), the yellow and black color scheme is further kept with a yellow tank top-esque shirt and black pants and boots, and while they're not constantly present he still has access to his tentacles.
He's not human, just pretending to be.
Leading me to some other little details, such as his lack of ears. And nails. And. Other things not visible that he didn't bother with. He pretends to be human, but doesn't care enough to look truly human- though he can pass as human. When he does bother to actually look human, he does have nails and ears, and changes his eye to a human one, with a color of choice. He goes by 'Warren' when actually pretending to be human. It doesn't mean anything in particular it's just a play on how 'bellum' is latin for 'war'. But, most of the time, he's not really trying. A sense of lack of real care is something I try to communicate with his humanoid design, hence him having generally baggy and plain clothes.
The 'war' thing about his character I think is decently expressed in game with him having an army of sorts with the phantoms and him just coming off as sort of violent but strategic. He also seems very scrappy, mostly attacks with direct contact including just straight up running into Link, and seems to put a lot of stock into sheer force and just fucking killing you at any cost after a certain point, but seems genuinely wary and cornered once someone is shown to be capable of actually posing an actual threat. I like the idea of human Bellum being a bit of a brawler in a sense, fighting with his bare hands and just being incredibly violent when he fights like a human, really only breaking out his more supernatural abilities when he just wants to get shit over with.
Part of the fun with Bellum is that there isn't much to him, so I'm taking a lot of liberties with him. His loose clothes are something that won't really get in the way of him fighting and do the bare minimum, and the boots he wears have metal toes for just a bit of extra ways to hurt people. He's built but still soft in places, not intended to be a muscular as Damien, he's intentionally designed his own human form to be a bit unassuming, so I've kept that he's made of a lot of circular shapes, his face is meant to be a bit of a round shape, his hair gives a round shape, and though he's fairly tall (he and Damien are 6 feet tall btw Linebeck throws off every post-ph cast height comparison) I think of him being a bit... small? If that makes sense? His clothes help with that, they're slightly oversized, and his posture isn't great; He's a bit like a delinquent, starting fights intentionally for the sake of violence and putting little effort into his appearance.
His scars are technically cosmetic. They aren't results of injuries; technically nothing but the Phantom Sword and things like it can hurt him. His scars are references to the markings on his demon body, and just further reflection of him being a creature all about violence and conflict. They aren't totally consistent between the times he uses his human form, but some of the bigger ones are, most notably the scar across his face.
I'll be honest. My earliest human Bellum designs were some Tumblr sexyman shit and I've been trying to ditch that SO BAD ever since. I think I've done well. The scar across his face is a big one. An added imperfection, a massive facial blemish that isn't really conventionally great to look at. His nose specifically has been though some development stages, at first I kept switching between different full nose shapes, then brought in the facial scar and decided that he'd be missing a chunk of that nose, then, decided, fuck it! I can't decide on a nose shape, so he gets no nose at all. I think it works pretty well and I like it.
I really tried to get in a lot of his personality to the design, and I don't want to go into all of it in this section, so just keep in mind that a lot of his design has been influenced by the way I've decided to write him, and some stuff I've already mentioned might be made a little clearer when I get into that. As a quick aside, he's pale partially because I've intentionally made him look halfway similar to Link, and partially because I figure he does not get a lot of sun; you literally meet him in what is effectively a basement, and from the way he operates, probably hasn't made himself seen in a while by the time the events of the game happen. He can't get sunburns, but, as he cannot change a lot of extremely major things about his human form, he can't manually change his skin tone in a major way, and it's likely that when he was considerably younger and newer and spent time in the sun, his skin tone would be closer to Oshus's, so a bit more tan.
In the Context of Phantom Hourglass and Post-PH
Moving swiftly on, as there is pretty much no real info about Bellum's background, I have taken matters into my own hands and decided a lot of it for myself in headcanon; Bellum is technically Oshus's son. Not in the traditional sense, but he was created by Oshus and can very much be considered his child, and to an extent, Ciela, Leaf, and Neri are all also Oshus's kids due to them being created by him (yea even considering Ciela calling him 'grandpa', in her and my defense she lost her memories and he is old as a human), therefore making (in some terms) Bellum to be Oshus's son and the brother of the three spirits. I think it's an interesting dynamic, to have Oshus be the one responsible for Bellum's existence, and for the three spirits you travel with and help you defeat Bellum to be closely related to him.
Oshus himself (when you get the hourglass in ph) says that the sand of hours is made of force gems of the ocean king (whatever... that wording means)- which then suggests that at the end of the day, all sands of hours are derived from the power of the ocean king, and Bellum dissolves into that sand at the end of the game, and I am standing in front of a wild-looking conspiracy cork board trying to piece this all together. I find it interesting if Oshus was the one who created Bellum before he created the three spirits.
(This is a topic for another post/fic but Leaf and Neri were neglected so bad in ph and it would be interesting to see more of how they feel abt Ciela before she gets her memories back and how they feel abt... anything else ig. I think they're neat, too, and I like tying the spirits together with Bellum in this way)
In Phantom Hourglass, it's strongly suggested (mostly through dialogue) that it's been a decent amount of time since Bellum defeated Oshus and took over the Temple of the Ocean King and created the Ghost Ship (though I suppose it could be possible that the Ghost Ship's existence precedes Bellum taking over that temple and defeating Oshus), but things across that sea are relatively calm, despite the new influx of monsters and the Ghost Ship making most people too afraid to sail. No one knows it's Bellum, though, and people do know about the Ocean King, so I wonder if Bellum is known about at all by the general public, or is a being that's more or less completely unknown? My personal theory is that he's vaguely known in some sense, as an obscure deity, and that he was behind the collapse of the Cobble Kingdom, since they were aligned with the Ocean King and Bellum appears to be his direct enemy and would likely then target the allies of his enemy.
Bellum seems to do a lot of behind the scenes stuff, never been seen until the end of the game and not even being mentioned until halfway through. As I think I've said before, he's practically won by the time he comes across Link and Tetra, the Ghost Ship going out and collecting people for him while he sits at the bottom of the temple and drains anyone who might be heading directly for him. He doesn't even seem to concerned about hunting Oshus down for good, and I suspect he likely doesn't even know about Ciela being split apart, so (asides from my idea that gods/spirits/stuff like that only being able to be sealed away, only properly killed under certain circumstances) I bet there's a level of confidence that he's got things under tight enough wraps that he's good to do whatever he wants.
Aaaand then he panics when he realizes how much of a wrench in his plans Link is, throwing two sea monsters at him and causing earthquakes, he's a procrastinator, I think. That, or he underestimated this kid. Both are very possible. Either way, it's interesting to look at what he's done and caused, hiding away the spirits and beating back the Ocean King, taking over his temple, creating the Ghost Ship to roam indefinitely, screwing with the Yook and wiping out pretty much all of the Isle of Ember, and likely being the reason behind the increased number of monsters. If you really look into it, while most characters don't really seem to realize, things are kind of fucked at the start of Phantom Hourglass, and it's interesting how Oshus himself seems powerless and even dissuades Link from giving it a shot, even if he secretly wants him to go and handle things.
With my idea of Bellum being a sort of technical relative to Oshus and the spirits, it opens up a handful of new avenues for motivation beyond just being after securing control and a steady stream of prey, I enjoy the idea of it being a matter of him becoming more and more ambitious, far beyond the station he was created for; going off of his name and ability to create phantoms, I imagine Oshus created him specifically to be warlike, perhaps initially with the intention of having him as a more violent protector of the realm, maybe to keep monsters in check or maybe just as a secondary deity for the world of the ocean king; I'll admit, I'm still a little foggy on what Bellum would've been initially created for, the spirits are easy to figure out, but I do figure it was something not as passive as just representing something, I imagine it as a deliberate opposite to Oshus himself to account for his weaknesses. Either way, I figure a part of Bellum's motivation involves him wanting more than he was given access to by Oshus, and deciding to fully wage war against him in a sense. The short and silly version is that Bellum is Oshus' shitty disowned son. Oshus isn't entirely innocent in whatever I decide caused Bellum to turn on him and the spirits, but Bellum does suck: that is important. The Cobble Kingdom looks like it's been destroyed for a while, I figure that was Bellum's first major target when he started outwardly going after Oshus and hunting the humans of the realm.
In Post-PH, he's the group's pet evil squid on a very very very short leash until he starts behaving himself and having a character arc.
Effectively, Bellum doesn't die at the end of Phantom Hourglass, instead being broken down into the sand of hours he's made of and being sealed inside the Phantom Sword- after all, after the final boss, the sand Bellum turns into goes into the Phantom Sword. I imagine that the Phantom Sword, after breaking and restoring Oshus, turns into the hourglass for Link to keep, while Oshus and the spirits keep the remaining sands, therefore keeping a hold of Bellum. (A bit like Oshus just being left alone after Bellum defeating him, they can't really kill Bellum so they just keep an eye on him while he's in a weakened state) They kind of just keep him prisoner at the bottom of the Temple for a bit, and Oshus finally decides to send him to Link's world as a punishment, since he's at his weakest and Oshus wants to get him to learn some lesson, it's a work in progress. Bellum is grounded in Post-PH.
It's basically that 'the villain when you unlock him as a playable character' bit, where he's quite a bit weaker than he is in Phantom Hourglass, though mostly for the sake of keeping things balanced, so Bellum can't break everything for everyone. He's still powerful, he still accesses his demon form, can't be conventionally killed or injured, and move through walls and turn people to stone, the whole deal, it's just that his demon form's size is impacted (i hc that the size of his demon form can be manipulated at will, but the largest size is dependent of how much power/stored life force he has. he's small at the start of post-ph, but his human form isnt impacted at all. i imagine that for beings like oshus and bellum, their human form is a like a 'low power mode' kinda thing) So Bellum is the Post-PH crew's fourth member, the swabbie on the ship and pet sea monster when they need it and when he has the energy for it.
Bellum is kept mostly in line by a vague fear of Link and his general fear, respect, and curiosity about Linebeck. Linebeck is usually the one holding onto Bellum's leash. Bellum is decently civil with the group from the start, since he's weak and unable to return home until Oshus permits it or he gathers enough power to make that trip, and works mostly as a fighter- when he wants to. The earliest limitation I came up for him, since he's the member with the highest chance of breaking things, is that he will just straight-up choose not to help. He decides he's busy, decides it's not his problem, or other limitations, such as his involvement likely to cause more problems that they solve, since he's rather destructive when fighting.
He's the least sociable most of the time, for obvious reasons, but can pretend, and has the least... casual skills to offer to the group, hence why he gets stuck as swabbie (also general disrespect/as a punishment for the ph thing) and it takes a while for him to properly warm up to the rest of the group. He and Linebeck start off on decent terms and get closer through them just initially trusting each other, he and Link take the longest to get used to each other for... obvious reasons, it takes a lot of fighting together and seeing that they can rely on each other and they learn to be decent with each other just by existing in the same space, and things with Damien start off half decent, Damien was not present during Phantom Hourglass (obviously) and doesn't have the full context of how much he sucks, but it starts decent, gets worse when he learns what happened, and then gets good again because Damien's kind of amiable in general and sees that Linebeck thinks he's fine.
SO! To actually address your question about him being 'redeemed'- he does have a bit of an arc that I'm still mentally workshopping. He isn't entirely redeemed, as the group's general morality is a big off-kilter when Link isn't looking or is willing to get a little gray with things, and there's not really a whooooole lot of atonement Bellum can do in terms of the volume of bullshit he pulled in the past. It's less him atoning or w/e for the bullshit he's done, that's not entirely feasible, it's more him just. being forced to Be Decent and learn some actual kindness and think about more than just his own survival, he's essentially forced to actually appreciate life and the world, it's more him actually... experiencing the world for a reason other than consumption and war and conflict and doing what he's been told, he's effectively just on this long voyage with Linebeck, Link, and Damien, going with them from island to island and seeing what's up. I'm going to try and keep empathy out of it, so he's not really relating on a visceral level, more just choosing to be kind and take gentler paths to solving problems and interacting with others. He's also the group gremlin.
The way I write Bellum is definitionally inspired by other characters, Power from Chainsaw Man comes to mind in how he has a kind of shitty brat attitude at times, he'd fling vegetables across the room because he's a piece of shit who likes live meat. He's got his shitty messy delinquent loser side, where he causes problems and acts like some asshole teenager, and he's got his more serious, calm, almost professional seeming side that reminds the group that he's a few centuries old at the least and practically a god in his own right; generally outside of Post-PH I would pick one of these two sides to focus on for aus, but in Post-PH I need to figure out how the two of them work with how Bellum generally operates.
He's interested in Linebeck and initially decides to go along because he wants to figure him out, but grows to enjoy the rest of the group and that curiosity expands to involve the world as a whole; he experiences things like art and music, where he can't just brute-force his way into a satisfactory outcome and has to learn and find his own style, he reads books and listens to stories and sees the different ways humans live on the seas and I want his arc to, in some part, be about him just finding meaning in the world beyond what he does to secure survival, and the other members of the group introduce him to those other facets of life that he has access to, has had access to. The other part is the group getting Bellum to see most living things as more than just prey for him to hunt and consume, but that generally goes hand in hand with the prior point, as he actually enjoys life and figures out what he likes beyond the basic things he was created for.
He can't fall back on just smashing through everything or creating phantoms, since he's far too weak to do either effectively at the start, and I intend to just force Bellum into basically just being a human character with some unusually powerful magic at his fingertips, first just wanting to build himself back up to what he was in Phantom Hourglass, then just getting to see things in a new light. I'm not sure how to explain it or even what I'll want to do when I get to it, but that's the general gist of his arc, I think.
Other than that, he's just the fourth members of the crew with a serious knowledge of... a lot of things as a centuries-old demon and the hardest hitter in the group who can't and won't cook for shit and kind of just learns to actually live without constantly gunning for those bare necessities long after he's gotten them. I don't want it to be 'he learns to be human' because he... isn't human, but just him appreciating life and seeing some value in it, especially as something with as much power as Bellum, it's a bit messy and I'm still figuring it out, but I've got the general direction figured out.
Bellum is effectively the ship's best defender, and ends up fitting into the group as a friend and with his own specific role with the other individual members of the group. Linebeck kind of kickstarts his arc for him and connects with him the most and Bellum generally stays the closest with him, but Damien and Link help him see other little corners of life, as well as other characters he has to interact with, and I think I want Bellum's side of the story to have the most outstanding mundane-ity to it- there's absolutely meant to be a slice-of-life aspect to Post-PH, but I want the biggest points of Bellum's arc to be comparably the most mundane. It's the little things with him. The others have little things, too, but... I'm not sure how to express the difference, but I promise there is a difference.
Outside of Post-PH, though, when Bellum is present in a big way, his arc either tackles a similar idea in a different way, is just about something entirely different, or he doesn't have an arc at all, either due to not being a big enough part of the story or just straight up not being present.
In the Context of AUs
Bellum is only present in a handful of aus, either fully present as a character, halfway present, or just being referenced. When he is present in an au, he's usually some kind of major character, and he's notable in the crimson king au, the space au, the murder mystery au, and the horror au and one of my 'ruined hyrule' aus. (the horror and ruined hyrule au will be put together for this bc bellum's role in both are very similar) (for reference, here's my au explanation post)
In the horror au and ruined hyrule au, Bellum serves juuuust about the same role, just with different capabilities, contexts, all of that, but it's more or less the same thing. He's frequently present, but usually not acknowledged, and is very close to Linebeck in both, and the two of them pretty much rely on each other to live due to circumstances out of their control; they didn't really go into this whole thing liking each other, but have been more or less forced to become each other's friends due to proximity and just. Needing the others' presence in order to survive. In both, Bellum usually is a character who knows more than the others, but doesn't bother sharing that information since it's either not totally relevant or he just doesn't want to, and he tends to be protective of Linebeck, half because he needs him in order to live, half just because he's ended up liking him. (there is. more to say. but since i may actually write one of these aus [likely ruined hyrule bc the horror one has to be visual and it is VERY plotless rn] i'm not gonna go into much more depth since it would require spoilers lol)
Can't say a whole lot about the space au, either, since the story of that one is still a work in progress, and Bellum isn't particularly a major character, though he is important to some B-plot stuff. Without digging up too much world building and background and general story stuff and important plot bits, he's got a fairly close relationship to Linebeck in this au, as a general beneficiary and friend, and he actually tends to mind his own business and just wants to hold his own position; he's not really antagonistic or anything, but definitionally morally dubious even if he doesn't really directly do a whole lot.
In the Crimson King au, though, Bellum is one of the main characters, and a bit different than in ph-related stuff. He spends a lot of time in his human form, only switching to his little demon form a handful of times, and usually just for fun. He plays the role of Linebeck's closest friend and beneficiary, practically being the reason why Linebeck is able to do any of the things he does in the story, helping him from behind the scenes at times and balancing that business with Linebeck with his more outward appearance as a mostly normal guy working for the person who runs his section of the city... who also happens to be him. The vague politics in this au would take a bit to explain in full, but Bellum in this au spends a lot of time keeping his actual identity under wraps, the basic premise being that he's decided to integrate himself into current mortal society like a normal person to see what trouble he can cause, how he could sustain himself while keeping things stable, and to see just how far he can go- essentially, the only danger he faces is if others figure out what he is, but even then, he knows he could very easily cut his losses and go back to what he's done best.
He's not very active in the main plot, mostly giving Linebeck assignments and pulling strings behind the scenes in order to help and keep him safe, but Bellum does occasionally meddle directly in Linebeck's situation whenever it relates to him, when he needs something extra done, or, later in the story, when he gets a bit worried about Linebeck. His general arc is essentially him owning up to the fact that he does, in fact, care about Linebeck's well-being. Crimson King Bellum is fun, because he can't really just be 'violent demon', and I just like the supporting role I've got him in. He's Linebeck's rich friend who hires him to kill people for him. It's fun.
How I Like to Write Him With Linebeck
Of course, Bellum is going to have stuff with Linebeck, both in aus and in post-ph. Bellum has interactions and relationships with other characters, but the dynamic(s) with Linebeck tend to be the most diverse and important.
With aus: There’s usually a general sense that Bellum is above Linebeck, both in the power sense and in the sense that he’s typically his boss or in charge of him, but in a handful they are on equal footing (specifically, the modern school one, where they’re just classmates.)- the most common dynamic is usually along the lines of Bellum hiring Linebeck to kill people for him. Bellum is typically someone that provides Linebeck with things like payment or equipment or safety- in the Crimson King au, he gives Linebeck a fair amount of money, and supplies his equipment and gives him a place to live when he does jobs for him.
I like to imagine there's a level of... recognition? Not empathy, trying to keep that to a minimum... He's almost gentle with Linebeck, and is uncharacteristically merciful towards him. In post-ph, Linebeck survives being possessed and this marks him as notable to Bellum, since most people he possess die very soon after being released, so he's initially motivated by curiosity and a desire to observe Linebeck when he acts less violently- that curiosity is the biggest reason why he's cordial with Linebeck across my aus as well.
With Phantom Hourglass-centric stuff (which is what I'll mostly just talk about here, since it's kind of the 'base' for all other Bellum and Linebeck stuff I do), Linebeck and Bellum start on halfway decent terms, I'm planning a Bellumbeck fic sometime in the future, which is a bit less focused on that actual fight and more on whatever's going on between Linebeck and Bellum. I'm still trying to pin down exactly what I want with Linebeck and Bellum's dynamic.
I’ve fallen back into shipping them, (Still iffy on ship name lmfao, Bellumbeck is taken by the game and ‘Linebellum’ is lame imo, so I’ve been sticking with just ‘bellum x linebeck’) but it’s not really typically romantic/sexual, though there are some aspects of both, it’s still kind of abstract and easier to define with example stuff rather than just trying to explain it in a concise paragraph.
They both go out of their way to effectively research each other before properly meeting, starting as just trying to find advantageous information, but eventually just doing research out of curiosity, especially on Linebeck’s end, hunting down any material that so much as alludes to Bellum while Oshus refuses to say anything extra on the topic. They have a mutual interest and curiosity about each other.
With Bellum, its a similar curiosity with how Linebeck survives being possessed, and a general interest in him as a person, as Bellum doesn't really care much about the world beyond how it can serve him, but felt the need to look into Linebeck. A lot of the time, Bellum starts with the intention of exploiting Linebeck in some way, then ends up actually caring about him, he usually goes through variations of the same arc regarding Linebeck. It works with Linebeck for me since I tend to read and write him as fairly morally gray, so he's more willing to reciprocate Bellum.
(There's also the whole bit with Linebeck being kind of a monsterfucker and having a thing for being tied up and just a handful of like. sexual stuff on Linebeck's end, but we're talking about Bellum's perspective here we can't be focusing on Linebeck)
Bellum primarily operates with survival on the mind, and at odds with anything that might get in his way, and secondarily treats mortal creatures as something to study. When his attempt to use Linebeck fails, he shifts to that studying, and therefore has some respect for him due to his survival. They both focus quite a lot on survival, and don't have the most interest in making connections, seeing most relationships as transactional. They understand each other; Bellum sees Linebeck's mind when possessing him, and therefore knows a great deal about him.
There are similarities between them; not-great relationships with their fathers, a strong desire for survival at any cost, generally low empathy and a habit of mostly viewing others for how they can be used, curiosity about anatomy, a higher tolerance for things like blood, gore, things that would likely make others squeamish, they both hate Ciela...
(As an aside to that last one, an idea I've decided to integrate into my ph stuff and may touch on in a future fic is that Linebeck calling Ciela 'sparkles' gives her a strong sense of deja-vu before she gets all of her memories back; it's something Bellum would call her, when he was more cordial with the other spirits)
Bellum hangs around on the ship, and he hangs around Linebeck the most, to the point of being annoying, but learns what boundaries are and ends up respecting them decently. I lean more into... things just working out, Bellum more or less being put in a situation where he chooses to change things up and be a bit kinder, starting with the guy he's decided was the catalyst for all of this.
He gets along well enough with Damien (damien ends up in that shipping, too, considering that he's already dating linebeck by the time bellum sorts his own feelings out, so in post-ph, bellum ends up being a sort of on-and-off polycule member), he is eventually friendly with Link, often because Linebeck likes him as well. It takes a very long time for he and Link to warm up to each other, so they'll likely end up in situations where they must rely on each other at the start of things.
Bellum is… very not used to social stuff or acting human, and isn’t even very used to his human form at the start, so he does spend that time with Linebeck while he figures things out, as well. Linebeck's not the best role model for decent social interaction, especially since he works on dismantling his own mask and figuring himself out for a bit at the start of post-ph, but he's the only person Bellum tolerates and respects at that start.
Bellum eventually gets roped into helping Linebeck cook, follows him around for ship maintenance, watches him patch up wounds, and just ends up as a crew member that can kind of fill any basic role, but he’s not making it much further than swabbie.
I haven’t actually written a ton of interaction between them yet, but what I have written always comes off as casual, almost humorous, they joke around with each other and Bellum is detached and unserious at times, but very capable of switching to dead seriousness. A lot of the time, Linebeck tends to take things more seriously at face value, but Bellum is more prone to joking around due to the fact that very few consequences mean anything to him.
He and Linebeck are typically close in one sense or another in most things where they're included, and I generally consider all dynamics between them to fall under the ship umbrella, because I don't consider it strictly romantic (though it usually ends up being vaguely like that), just more that there's some kind of intimacy between them at some point. It's a relationship whose dynamic I think is interesting given the... lack of actual interaction between them, but with just enough interesting conclusions that can be drawn.
I guess it's similar to the general stuff I have about Bellum, kind of just scraping ideas together from canon and then following whatever threads can be connected to them, while trying to make sure it still has roots in that canon. It's similar to my personal 'design philosophy' or whatever for my aus.
I've also considered making their relationship parasitic in someway, as a sort of homage/callback/reference to their canonical relationship, but it's not entirely a direction I really want to go in, and I feel like some aus get decently close.
Final Points
I think Bellum's really neat, so considering the general lack of information or depth to him, I've been playing with expanded ideas and building up my own ideas for him, specific within the context of Phantom Hourglass and a post-ph setting, while many of my other ideas with him tend to then derive from that.
His (human) design is one I've spent a very long time figuring out, trying to mix his demon design in with more human traits, trying to keep him distinctive without getting too complicated, and trying to have that design represent him decently with a fair bit of reasoning behind a lot of that design. It's something Bellum himself controls to a certain degree, so it's in a bit of a crossroads between portraying him based on his character, and being something he uses to come off as generally innocuous.
I've got a decent idea of what Bellum's whole deal is in Phantom Hourglass and afterwards, and I use him in a fair number of aus, often in tangent with Linebeck, whom I often give him some kind of intimate relationship, be it romantic or some other form of closeness, based off of ideas for ways they would interact and why.
Bellum's fun! He's fun as he is, and he's fun to build off of and develop further than what we see in the game. And giving him the ability to shift into a humanoid shape gives even more room to play around in. I don't know when I first came up with the idea, but I've had ideas for a human form Bellum for quite some time now, I've just only recently really started solidifying a lot of it. Even between the time when I got the ask and finished it, I came up with new ideas.
But for now, these are the broad strokes! Not just about post-ph humanoid Bellum, just about my ideas for him in general, though it all really relates back to that one in particular, honestly.
He's surprisingly fun to speculate about! I didn't really expect Bellum to end up as one of my favorite LoZ characters, but I guess any character can end up as your favorite if you spend enough time thinking about him. At the end of the day I think he's funky, and he's fun to use in a post-ph setting.
#asks#goopi-e#bellum#long post#salty talks#linebeck#he's important <3#phantom hourglass#post ph#i have like no excuse for why this took so long. initially it was bc i was waiting on that bellum commission but then like#the day i wrote this (+ the prior) tag i bought and played fallout new vegas for a few hours. it fell in with my other writing projects lol#i think rn myb iggest issue w/ post ph is that everyone seems to revolve around linebeck a bit much#idk if thats. terrible a breaker i mean hes their captain hes kinda the main character he's the one link (heh) between all of them#bellum probably has the biggest arc bc hes the shittiest at the start and everyone is already kinda partway through one#like i think links is gonna be abt him disconnecting from being a hero and just enjoying life on his own terms and doing non hero things#linebecks is uh. trauma recovery. among other things. like everyone has trauma recovery as a part of it but linebecks is the big one#damiens is... man idk hes just There i think his is gonna have smth to do with his relationship w/ linebeck and the others#damien is just some fucking dude hes not too terribly traumatized or has this huge place in the world he's jsut some trans guy#it kinda sucks that a lot of the stuff i think up for him relates to linebeck like i want him to have his own thing but i made him too...#hes too ok with things!!!!! hes just some fucking guy!!!! maybe i can have him just figure out his place in this larger world hes exploring#anyways bellum needs to be nerfed in a handful of different ways bc otherwise hes a get out of jail free card in a lot of contexts#ughhh this took too long im sorry but i just kept coming up with new stuff id practically classify this as a fic#this took a while to plan and this fucking thing is also so long and it still doesnt really cover everything#not even bc i havent fully figured out what i want to do with him like theres just stuff im uncertain on how to explain in a concise manner#the whole thing between link n bellum is kinda simple. they hate each other and then have to work together and decide that theyre decent#damien is just. pleasant most of the time. so hes kinda chill with bellum. he's had experience with minor gods n deities#his weird thing is that he is technically normal but he is on good terms with a lot of supernatural/godly beings#theres def a lot of random minor gods n spirits n supernatural creatures all over the great sea with the absence of larger gods' influence#kinda lost the point of the og ask so i hope thats ok
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sparky-is-spiders · 9 months
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It's been a hectic couple of days but I FINALLY have this one done!! For JE week day 2, up too late/vampires, which is definitely today and not two days ago and I will not hear a word otherwise.
I'm a sucker for both pre-S1 Jonelias and Jonjonah so I couldn't resist adding them both.
This is intended to be semi-chronological (time travel nonwithstanding)? with pre-S1/S1 Jon on the left with S4-S5 Jon on the right, but you could read them as separate AUs. I enjoy Jonjonah with time-travel shenanigans where full Archivist Jon meets Jonah, who is waaaay too invested in flirting with eyeball monsters in Jon's personal opinion.
Can't decide if it would be better for the Beholding to improve Jon' better's vision or if it's still terrible but there is no conceivable glasses design that would not be massively annoying for them (just a constant mesh of glasses frames over their field of vision. I honestly think I'd go insane). Either way they glow slightly naturally but are glowing even more to help them see the document (and also because I think green light effects are cool; sue me).
Also went with the Scottish Wildcat for Jonah's fursona! Some artistic license was taken on the design, but most of it isn't very visible.
#It is very late in both of these and also here in real life#but I REALLY wanted to get this out today#context for left scene: Jon is doing some work in Elias' office very late and he came to say goodnight#I like to imagine that Jonah kept some of his furniture even as he switched bodies because it means I can use the exact same desk design in#the exact same position instead of drawing a brand new one#context for right scene: Jonah said something forward and Jon realized that he's actually been flirting the /entire time/ Jon has been ther#and also Jon having way too many eyes on their face and all of them looking shocked is funny#also it isn't directly relevant to the images but Jonjonah ARE t4t.#just so you're aware#also put Jonah in a nightshirt because I Did Not Want to be researching regency era clothing at 8 in the evening and also have no experienc#with drawing clothes ever. I draw dragons and it is normal for dragons to be naked. is the Thing.#speaking of. you'll NEVER guess what my plans for the fantasy prompt are. (it's dragons. my entire life revolves around dragons of course I#had to make them dragons)#anyway I'm running out of things to say. Time for sorting tags:#jonelias#jonjonah#joneliasweek2023#joneliasweek#also for anyone who didn't see my first thing:#jon is a tortoiseshell cat#elias is a common genet#jonah's species was explained earlier#I made them anthro because I can't draw humans. Also I don't want to draw humans.#ok I HAVE to go to bed now#goodnight#(why is Jenny only being a lap cat when I need to get up and Do THings???? she's so cute and soft it's unfair)
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quelsentiment · 3 months
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sporesgalaxy · 1 year
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that anon haunts me. like for real. i think about it at least once every few months and it drives me insane all over again
fair. im honestly more haunted by the one commenter from back when it first blew up who seemed fully convinced no one reads any classic literature, ever
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kindaeccentric · 11 months
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Me, unable to part with any object of even a sliver of sentimental value, because of trauma of not being allowed to ever truly 'own' my things, looking at Frank Iero doing a sale of his bands' memorabilia and shaking: What the fuck what the fuck!!! 😭
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prfctmxxnlight · 2 years
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okay yeah i’m excited about volume 2 but what happens when it comes out? like what am i supposed to do then???
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note-boom · 2 years
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Okay, I just read Volume 20 of the manga and I have a lot of thoughts...but one that I really want to spit out is about Akutagawa's death.
During the fight, he CONTINUOUSLY brings up Dazai. How he wants Dazai's approval. How he's going to LIVE and make it back to Dazai. How he doesn't have much time left so he really needs that approval before he expires. Basically, him (ironically) associating living and Dazai together. To get Dazai's acknowledgement is to live.
And yet.
And YET.
His death wasn't an accident, at least not entirely.
Even Fukuchi acknowledged that from the beginning, taking into account the space-time sword, Akutagawa's plan was to let ONLY Atsushi escape.
Did Akutagawa know he would be instakilled? I think he strongly suspected it considering how Fukuchi was doing his best to kill them.
Essentially, what I'm saying is that provided all that context, Akutagawa basically CHOSE to die when throughout the whole fight his only thought was to live, live, live (for Dazai). The arc isn't over yet (and I honestly have little faith this will happen) but I'm gonna hope anyway that this is symbolic of Akutagawa finally letting go of his deep desire to live for Dazai's approval and maybe starting to build something new...a new reason to live?
As in, him choosing death - choosing ATSUSHI - was his way of saying, "Okay. I see only one of us can make it out...I can't fight this man and beat him (which he did say). I won't live for Dazai's approval now. I can't. So I'll instead choose to die so that there is a chance Atsushi can save the world and clear the Agency's name."
Basically, I'm playing on the age old death and rebirth motif to say Akutagawa dying for Atsushi rather than living for Dazai's approval is his way of growing from his past obsessions and perhaps beginning to build a new reason to live (by dying for it heh...).
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seventeendeer · 2 years
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alright owl house fans, I'm sorry but I have to take a bat to the hornet's nest tonight, so if you just wanna enjoy your cozy cartoon in peace stop reading Now ok, no hard feelings
I just watched the season 3 premiere and it only reinforced my probably controversial take:
amity barely qualifies as a character anymore. that girl is made of cardboard and prayers, and the fact that she keeps getting shoved to the front of the narrative because she is The Girlfriend only further accentuates the fact that there's straight up Nothing going on with her outside of her romance subplot. by contrast, willow and gus continue to be the most charismatic supporting characters, who have to share whatever table scraps of screentime are left over after the plot relevant characters are done talking, since neither of them have had a consistent reason to be on screen since season 1
imho in a better world, amity, willow and gus would have been boiled down to two supporting characters - luz's shy, standoffish upperclass love interest with a complicated family life who eventually stands up for herself and becomes bold and spunky, and luz' one roguish weirdo outcast friend who stood by her since the beginning. the two characters could easily have played out amity and willow's troubled history with one another while they were at it. with only two characters for the writers to keep track of instead of three, the writers might even have been able to give the platonic relationship proper attention and development, and the love interest character could have actually been fun to watch when she was on her own, instead of giving luz one really boring girlfriend who has no personality outside of the relationship and two really likeable but really underdeveloped "best friends" that she never gets any screentime with.
owl house is really cute and I really respect what it's trying to do but I would have killed to see a show with this much budget and talent on board written by people who can write
#deerchatter#owl house negativity cw#this show reads like it was written by an ai trained exclusively on childrens fantasy novels#we need Quirky Outcast Protagonist! we need Conventionally Attractive White Girl Love Interest Whose Life Revolves Around Protagonist!#we need Weird Outcast Friends! we need Angsty Damaged Boy With A Good Heart!#etc etc etc. it's just a rehash of the writers' favorite tropes without any indication they understand what the tropes are FOR#and before any1 comes to fuck w me like buhh it's just a kids cartoon it's not meant to be smart CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING:#1. it is TRYING to be smart. it is TRYING to follow in the footsteps of better kids cartoons in the same genre (su and spop come to mind)#2. season 1 of owl house was great because it stuck to what the writers were good at: comfy fantasy family comedy.#kids cartoons don't have to be smart to be good but the goal of any piece of media should be to accomplish what it sets out to do#and owl house wants to be smart soooo badly and it straight up is not. and that makes me sad. because!! cool witch stuff !!!!#once more the core of my annoyance is that i want a thing to live up to its true potential and it straight up isn't ;_;#i got beef w su over some of its later narrative choices mostly for personal reasons but man its writers could WRITE.#they didn't always write stuff i liked but man could they write!!!! they had so much to say and they knew how to use tropes#and they did so much stuff that was NEW#mad respect. sometimes also just mad. but mostly respect
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leconcombrerit · 2 years
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I've seen a few posts about leaving fandoms once there's no more canon content recently, both here and on Instagram, and it got me thinking.
Because I do this to an extent.
I do stick around for a few months, but usually after that I just hop on to something new (new to me, not necessarily new to the world). It's not that I don't like the thing anymore, just that I've pressed it out of all its sweet dopamine juice. I thought of it 24/7, made every drawing I could possibly make, built a hundred AUs, analyzed every bit of meta I found, and now I'm bored of it. It feels like 100% completion. I can rotate it in my brain and appreciate how good it looks under every angle, but I won't find any new interesting detail to latch on.
For me it's a question of intensity. I'm so in the fandom that it can't last. Look, I still love Tales of Symphonia to bits, but I had what, 18 years to think of it ? I can still occasionally dive into it but that's it. I'm done. It's in my mental shelf for safekeeping.
I have nothing but respect for those who manage to stick around for that long though, you folks are the real heroes.
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9, 14 & 19 for the new year asks!
Best month for you this year?
Ooh. I’m going to go with august. I got a new job, and it’s my birthday month lol
Favorite book you read this year?
I read a Book to my niece (she is 2) about colors and she got every one wrong. Like she knows the words but can’t seem to connect the word blue to the color blue. Imma go with that book.
What’re you excited about for next year?
Im excited to see myself grow. I haven’t been doing… great lately. I’ve had to go into Survival Mode for the last couple months and it’s been really draining. I’m not out of the woods yet, but I’ve got a plan. I just need time to make it work out. I’m just excited for time to pass so I can get out of this hole.
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🤙
#dawg they are so right when they say that your mindset is the most powerful tool - if not sometimes the solution - to a shitty situation#like I didn't get nearly enough sleep last night and my now my bus has broken down and I'll be late for work and most likely therefore end#up leaving late for work - despite how I planned ahead and got up early and had plans for after work that might be delayed or cancelled now#but BITCH I'm listening to anpanman and recreating the bts concert that I went to in my head#and I'm being flooded with that same feeling I got when I saw them performing this live on stage...the colourful lights & BOUNCY CASTLE#THE SECOND TIME? and remembering their enthusiasm and warmth and the nice things they said to us and I'm SMILING#serotonin really be stored in the airpods ig#but for real I recently became friends with someone who received life coach training & she has inspired me so much to implement a mindset#revolved around gratitude#like now I'm stuck in rain bc we are in need of a replacement bus BUT that gives me more time to chill on my phone + my boss is#understanding and wouldn't punish me for being late like some others would + the air feels soo refreshing + a dozen other reasons to feel#good despite the circumstances#every day above ground is a good day bitch!#wow imagine my depressed ass self from years ago hearing me say that...she could never#anyway that's it from me today see you next time beloved internet diary of mine#personal#I'm ✨ a 🤩 new 🌈 superhero 💃 ANPANMAN 💜#(blatantly ignores that the lyrics are actually supposed to be deep and sad and sentimental LMAOOOOOOOOO 😭)#we are on the new bus now let's goo
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80zgf · 1 month
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i’ve had this extra shitty feeling lingering over me all semester and it’s doing such a fantastic job at getting the best of me. my friend group since the first year keeps proving time and time again they care more about each other even when i go out of my way to make sure they’re alright and make sure everybody else avoids things that would upset others. feelings get hurt a lot otherwise. a few nights back i took my a few of my friends out to eat and pay for part of their meals (context: my dad’s boss gets tipped through gift cards sometimes and he gave me a few so it wasn’t exactly out of my pocket). i told my best friend i haven’t been really been feeling my best so to take it easy on me since our other two friends have been deeply upsetting me all week by saying genuinely hurtful shit. and then in the middle of a very stressful meal he started telling me about how his sister’s boyfriend was saying weird shit abt me and her boyfriend doesn’t like me (i have never had a proper conversation with either one of these people) and i ended up fucking bawling lmfaoooo. i guess my friends froze because i’m the “tough friend” so i’m not allowed to cry but it ended up with in me comforting them which is so odd? i get not everyone you encounter will be your #1 fan but if someone pulls you aside and says hey man i haven’t been feeling great lately why would you say that at that time ??? lmfao
(goes without saying but d-on.t r.-b pls)
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tarjapearce · 6 months
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Poppy Blue
Blue Jones! Miguel x Baby Doll! Reader.
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Art by @marbipa on x
WARNINGS: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. Power play, choking kink, rough sex, mentions of abuse, preying, toxic and perverted behavior, implicit clandestine and illegal activities, lobotomy, dissociation, implicit depersonalization, objectification, hate sex, manhandling, violence, sub space. No Proofread.
Summary: Messy things ~ (I guess?) Miguel as Blue Jones from Sucker Punch.
A/N: Watched Sucker Punch last night and... yeah. Had to get this out of my system. ~ Another one for the Miguelverse ~
Masterlist
All it took was a bullet. Aimed at your assailant with no intentions of missing. Yet you did. You missed, failed terribly so. His chest was your goal, instead it went directly to his shoulder.
Projectile ripping and scorching skin, tissue and muscle in the go, earning a shaky and pained yelp. But it was the least he deserved after trying to be sneaky on your sister, that laid cold and bled out in the floor. She was no match for his knife and his blood thirst of the night. The rest was a blur.
And now, you were dragged down to the wet and dull greys walls of your future home. Lennox House. Or rather Lennox Asylum for the Mentally Ill.
Everything about the place screamed danger, everything about the people working in the monstrosity of place yelled I'm no better.
Barefoot, soaked in rain, holding your new uniform and gazing at the biggest man you've seen in you life, holding a bunch of keys while his eyes bore into you.
The way he stared made your skin crawl and it didn't help your clothes clung to your body. Arms braced the uniform closer to your chest, trying to cover it up. His eyes wandered to the man behind you, a police officer with three scratched lines into his face. You hadn't left him unscathed. Not when he tried to play rough with you back at your old home.
The man showed you around, place was as depressing as it was from the outside, but The Theater took the prize.
Girls your age dressed in gray, socializing in the area. And by socializing it'd mean to watch them either receive therapy with a polish beautiful woman named Vera Gorski, or watch them fight over the stupidest things. But who could blame them?
Some probably had enough time inside that had memorized the cracks in the wall, the scratches on the floor, the number of chewed gums underneath the table or how many dust particles were accumulated in the windows. Gray. Everything was gray and dull.
Even the voice of the men behind you talking about a price for your silence were tiresome and dry. Two thousand. That's what your memories were valued as. A number you now hated.
Corrupt pigs
The police officer gave you a gentle push forward as a nurse came to fetch you. The simple touch of that man made your skin revolt and slapped him hard across his wilting face, a scowl on your grimace that slowly turned into a smirk as the police officer tried to catch you, but you were being dragged away by two nurses into a life that would turn your head upside down and backwards, the many times it saw fit until you'd understand that you weren't in charge.
Until you'd understand your purpose.
Dance.
"If you don't dance, you have no purpose."
Madam Gorski murmured to you. Pretty, dangerous and aware of the many many situations revolving in the brothel. Cause in truth, the asylum was just an alibi and a frontage for the real deal. House Lennox. A house of pleasure.
Bets, drinks, sex, meds and a hell of a show to anyone that filled Miguel's pockets.
The main attraction? Girls that society deemed unfit to keep within her picky guts. Too into messy situations to keep the pretense around relatives. Too fucked up to function properly but good enough to mold and shape into something useful, and too tempting to break even further.
She mumbled while circling you, her dark eyes scrutinized you unabashedly, taking in everything her sight could reach. Pursing her pouty lips upon your body.
Pretty, scared, still holding a grip on reality while trying to swallow a really hard to deglute pill, and oh so perfect for a new purpose.
"We do not keep things in here that serve no purpose."
The collide of her cane on the floor was like a metronome, setting the pace to enter a forbidden place, somewhere that none could reach but you. Mind splitting in two, dissociating soul from conscience, leaving an empty, moving vessel behind. You were free for a moment. And now you wanted more, more of that place where your imagination ran rampant.
Where Gorski's words meant nothing, where the guards had no power, where you were allowed to break down and feel without second intentions or being frowned upon. But mainly, without Miguel’s preying gaze licking you raw while undressing your form with it.
But the clapping and praising brought you back to this reality. Red eyes fell upon you, studying, raking over your body upside down, stopping at your thighs to then go back to your flushed and breathless face.
Mr. O'Hara. Miguel 'Blue' O'Hara. The asylum guard, the key bearer, perverted pimp, and your new shadow.
Ever since that dance many things changed.
Even though you danced, duties in the asylum weren't to be neglected. If you said no, you'd get a visit to the hole.
If you didn't dance, you'd get a visit to the hole.
But if you didn't do things Miguel's way, you'd get a personal talk with him, and then a visit to the hole.
And those talks, surely weren't words.
Scrubbing the floors gave you the chance to listen a bit of everything. Girl's derangements, psychotic outbreaks, mumblings that were filled in with regret and many more flourishing emotions; the ever loud music from the cook, and the unceasing mewls and obscene noises coming from Miguel's office.
Some girls misbehaved on purpose, just to get a taste of him. Others did anything to draw his attention to them, specially in the dance floor. But you knew better to anger him.
Sure, pleasure came in hand with a high price. He wasn't good, he wasn't nice nor gentle, matter-of-factly some girls cried during their one on one sessions and the degradation only enhanced the tears.
Sick fuck.
Gorski's alarms flared up upon seeing belt marks on their legs and ass, bites in their inner thighs and bruises on their hips. Eyes a bit too gone and tired to actually work in anything. They might have spread the gossip around of Miguel fucking them, and even enjoyed it.
But the aftermath of it, said otherwise. And it was enough to keep you on check, but even so he was pulled to you like a magnet so strong you could see the refrain in his eyes every time he approached you.
Hands shaky, tongue rubbing and wetting his plump lips, a soft flush on his cheeks and pleading eyes. A silent 'Let me play too' cause he wasn't allowed to touch, or taste you. Instead, he'd use the girls willing to please him to take his anger out. Their bodies meant nothing, they meant nothing cause they weren't you.
They didn't have your body, they didn't have your sweet voice that distorted into moans and gasps that he'd kill to induce every time you danced, but above all, they didn't have your spark.
That little interaction with the police when you first arrived, had him folding on a bathroom, stroking himself to oblivion at the mere sound of your slaps.
Unbeknownst to you, you held so much power over him. Power he was set to dull, because he was the only one in control. Not even Gorski and her stupid polish methods to get in the rest's head. He ran the place and had it under control.
For how long though?
You wanted out. His little Poppy wanted out and surely would get everything to be free and leave him, forsake him in this damned place.
Anger flowed within his veins like molten lava upon remembering how other men looked at you, how other men wanted you. They'd possibly been imagining how good and tight your insides would feel cause the way you moved when you were up in the stage, was surreal. It was like another person took over.
But he, a sick fuck through and through, would want both. No. He'd have both. He craved and needed both, even better when you were dressed in such things that only added more dry bones to his needy fire.
Fucking lucky of them to feel you and be a your second skin. Even that stupid and everything but innocent uniform you were to dress every day, stirring up enough to let him take a peek of your panties, or the stockings underneath that remained etched on your supple thighs he'd often fantasize in getting lost between.
He just had to wait for you to misbehave. But sadly you didn't seem keen into breaking the rules. He'd wait.
---
"Stormy, come."
Vera called another girl. Whoever gave their names either knew them too well or picked random words in a go. Gorski too engrossed into her lessons to notice you had been dragged away by other guards under Miguel's petition.
Had you forgotten about something? No. Surely not. Last week's chores were fulfilled completely, the bathrooms were clean, the kitchen's dishes turn were washed up, and so were the floors. Your wrists sore, a reminder to ask for a new brush.
And-
Shit.
Fuck.
The laundry.
Some dancers had ran out of stockings, lingerie, and some sheets from the brothel needed to be replaced ASAP.
But you, Poppy, as Vera had called you and it stuck with the rest ever since, had trouble. Just cause you had forgotten about the damn laundry.
Miguel's formidable frame came into view, he was on a call, lying on how well someone's daughter was doing after a lobotomy. How they didn't have to worry about her anymore.
Your stomach felt sick and your heart leaped on your chest once he ended up the call. The guards had been long gone, leaving you with your shadow alone.
If honest, you knew Miguel either followed or kept you watched under hawk's eyes. Time stopped as soon as he turned to face you.
Pupils wide blown as soon as you came into his sight.
"My sweet, sweet Poppy."
He inhaled deeply and clasped his hands together before his face. An uncontainable smirk morphed into a light titter.
"You've been a bad girl, princesa."
His hands slamming on the table before him made you jolt and blink at his sudden mood shift.
"We..." He wetted his lips as he came behind you, "We were counting on you, Mi cielo. But... you failed us. Failed me."
A gulp as his breath fanned over the crook of your neck.
"You see..." His big and long fingers brushing your hair away from the right side of your head joint, "Now I gotta improvise something for the next show. "
"I'm sorry, I forgot-"
His hand took a hold of your neck and the contact made him growl. Warm, smooth, feeling every heartbeat underneath his big and calloused palms.
Lips dangerously close to your ear, breathing and panting as he pulled you closer to him, your back colliding against his torso and abdomen.
"Shh"
He hushed while taking a big whiff off you. A mix of soap, perfume and cigarettes. His hand squeezed tighter, earning a lovely and sweet yelp from you as he pushed you against his desk.
Your eyes widened in surprise upon feeling the hardening cock in between the slot of your thighs, poking, begging to be released and finally take you.
"You remind me of someone. Too bad she lost her spark."
His hand riled the skirt of your uniform up, passing up some layers of extra clothing, your underwear and stockings. Hand plunged inside to finally allowing his fingers to have a sample of your flesh.
"But I'm keeping yours alight, sweetheart."
His cock twitched when he found your clit. Fingers dexterous and peeling the outer folds away to give a gentle rub before you closed your legs almost instantly. A little delaid reaction, your brain was still processing it.
You went completely still when he pulled his fingers out of you and brought them to his lips. He sucked them off with hunger, groaning and trembling at the taste.
"Por Dios, preciosa..."
You tried to pry his hand out of your neck but the struggle made his breathings more labored and needy as he humped and ground against you from behind. Letting his tip to speak volumes at how hard and wanton he was. How bad you made him react. How much power you had over him.
Of course.
The idea of having him subdued to you assaulted your mind. Pressuring you into pleading, just like your clit that clenched and twitched upon having his tip rubbing in a slow yet firm strokes.
His hands went back inside your panties, searching for the nub of nerves that had you melting. Tongue skimming at the tender skin of your neck.
Just as he was about to bury a finger knuckle deep, the ever annoying voice of Vera urging Miguel from outside the door, asking for you. Her dear and lovely Poppy.
"Chingada madre" (Fucking shit)
He sighed with an exasperated growl and looked at the door.
"The fuck you want?!"
"I need Poppy on the practice. Now."
Where was the shocking baton when he needed it the most?
For once, you were relieved to know that you didn't go unnoticed under Gorski's watch. She protected the girls in her own way.
Knees trembled as he kept the hand inside. A little miscalculation had you whimpering while his fingers remained trapped in your flesh. His eyes snapped back on you with a smirk.
A hand clasped on top of your mouth, suffocating any moans as he worked his fingers between your pussy. Touching and prodding at the forbidden flesh, a moan vibrated through his hand with a high pitched Hmm
"I'll get her to you right away!"
Miguel yelled while working his fingers harder and faster, alternating between rubbing and fucking your hole with them.
"Spread your legs wider, pretty baby" The husk of his voice made you close your eyes and hips hump ever shyly at his hands. Gaining as much friction as possible.
"Miguel, I need her now."
He grumbled under his breath while moving his hands faster. The wet smooch and sucking squelch had him humping against your panties, breaths agitated, muttering something you could only decipher as filth in spanish, your hands clenched onto him, tightly fisted on his clothes.
Just a bit more
He heard Vera cursing in her native tongue as he prodded his fingers inside, toying with your opening. Stretching and fucking it at his likings.
"You fucking little slut"
He tittered while rubbing furiously in your clit. A bit too rough that had you bucking and trembling in his arms. If his hands made you quiver and melt he couldn't wait to see what his cock could do. You drenched his fingers.
Said fingers were cleaned up again by his mouth with a droopy and pleasure drunk face.
Despite having your legs shaky, he held you by the hips, and forced you to grab onto his desk. His hands quickly fumbled with his pants and boxers, pulling his cock out.
He stroked a couple of times, tip susceptible to stimulation. He pulled the panties aside, your stockings the only barrier between you and his erection. The flimsy layer of clothes instantly adhered to your soaked skin, He pushed in between your thighs, rubbing his cock back and forth with slow thrust against your pussy. His hot length brushed against the already engorged and sensitive nub.
The tightness of your warm thighs smooshed together created the perfect friction hole for him without actually penetrating you. So close and yet so far of that forbidden territory. Soft mewls and whimpers came out your mouth, too enraptured in feeling than verbalizing your pleasure.
He also needed his toys. Specially his favorite. Stockings were thoroughly soaked the more he pushed his cock in and out. Labia clothed and slicked parted to feel his shallow moves. He used you as his fleshlight, his hips smacking yours. His chest rumbled with animalistic and low growls.
His hands were clumsy as the pleasure turned overwhelming, you could see the flushed tip of him peeking out your thighs, the urge of tasting him turned bigger the faster he went. You were trying so hard to keep it as quiet as possible.
"Wished I was inside you, don't you?"
You gasped as he purposely angled his tip in your dripping hole. A shivering breath was all he received.
He took you by your chin and squeezed
"Don't you?!"
"Y-Yes!"
"Yes, what?!"
"Yes, sir."
Jesus fucking Christ.
He pushed in deeper in your cunt, his cock pushed a bit of the stockings inside as he doused it with his cum, unable to hold back any longer, marking you.
You had never heard a man pant and wheeze like that before. So deep, raspy, needy, cradling you tighter, anchoring to you as he shook his orgasm out.
"Fuck- Ay Dios, fuckfuck-"
He slurred while engulfing your frame against the table. Breathings matching his erratic ones.
Your skin between supple thighs felt clammy and sticky. Black stockings ruined completely by the white and wet patch of his scent.
Hot breath fanned over your neck.
"Can't wait to feel the real de-"
The door banged.
"Boss! We need you!"
The guards and Vera had proposed to fuck around with him cause his patience had been tested many times.
Your steps marching away from him snapped him out of his thoughts, He blinked and held you by the wrist, pulling you once more to him to kiss you.
Your first kiss in years. Soft but needy and filled in with a promise to fulfill later.
Now that he had a taste, there was none to stop him. He'd take his favorite toy and go home.
----
Freedom was taken away from you, right before your eyes. Forsaken by your so called friends, marooned by the crew you had gathered within the depths of despair. Your hope had given them a chance at surviving, your courage had transformed you into a fucked up sisterhood, but it was their greed that made you the ultimate sacrifice to their success.
You could only watch while thrashing your way out, but the more you fought, the more guards came to you, but one in particular pulled you out of the mess like a feather. But you didn't stop fighting. Not even when your tabs were in absolute zero probabilities of winning, not when Miguel dragged you inside manhandling your crying form like a ragdoll.
Scratches, fists and other punches didn't move him in the slightest. His grip tightened once you both were locked up in his office once more. He tossed you on the floor.
"Why... Why did you want to leave?"
His tone menacing yet hurt.
The idea of you almost slipping away from him had sent him in a berserk mode that unleashed hellbent through the asylum. Just to find you and when he did, he wanted nothing but hurt you, just the way you've hurt him.
Wasn't his attention enough? , wasn't him being lenient on you and your chores enough? Wasn't he enough?
"WHY?!"
You were too dumbfounded to process his question. Too marked with shame at your failure and rage to pay him attention, and that alone sent him grabbing you by the neck and crash you against a vanity. Tossing everything above it to the floor.
Your back collided against the now shattered mirror, you yelped but still managed to slap him and that made him groan and nod frantically.
Yes
One of his hands was more than enough to hold your both arms as he positioned between your thighs, pressing further against you.
"You don't like me, Poppy? Why?"
"Let me go!"
His hand squeezed your neck tightly, cutting all air for a minute while he kissed you. Sloppy, angry and so full with lust and rage. It gave you no time to react while his other hand tore the panties from underneath your skirt.
You kept slapping him, but that only enticed him to spread you further
"Love that fucking spark on you, preciosa."
He then thrashed you against the table sending a painful jolt through your body, It made you still for a moment.
"No! No! Don't-" his eyes widened in panic, "Don't lose it. Please-"
"No" You panted, "Just found it" A flower vase was smashed in his forehead. And that granted you freedom from his hands as you fell on the floor, gasping for air and crawling away from him.
Heavy steps echoed, trailing dangerously after you. Miguel took you by the ankle and dragged you towards him.
"No!"
He hissed and pulled you upwards, like a statuette, and slammed your torso against the desk you had been clenching onto. All air knocked out your lungs.
A hand passed over his buckle and removed in a swift motion his belt in one go. The sight of your pussy peeking underneath the ruffles of your skirt made a smile that didn't reach his eyes to appear.
He quickly got the belt around your neck, your hands instantly pried, or at least tried to pry it away, scratching yourself in the process. The smell of copper filled in the air, the vase had broke the skin of his forehead.
"You fucking ungrateful bitch!"
He secured the belt tighter and you wheezed, hands flailed to get a hold of him. Fingers already prodding and toying with your cunt, to his surprise, the struggle and fight turned you on, knowing that a man wanted you so badly that would do anything to have you, and you denying such power had you soaked.
Specially when the man in question was this 6'9" cell guard that wanted nothing but to wreck you, destroy you the way you had destroyed his fucked up illusions.
"All I did for you, everything I did meant shit for you-"
He rasped before slapping your butt with such force it stung and left a red imprint on the now reddening flesh.
"I didn't... a-ask you for shit!"
He grunted at your broken words as he pulled the makeshift leash backwards, separated your legs and pulled out his cock once more.
"There we go, baby"
"Y-You're so pathetic-"
Words died in your throat as he slid inch by inch inside. The intrusion made you sob a feeble whimper, it burned and hurt, but in a way you weren't expecting and you liked it.
"Me? Pathetic? Ay muñeca, is not me whose gonna beg me to stop" He pulled your face towards him and kissed you once more, "You won't even remember your name once I'm done with you."
He buried to the hilt as he watched your expression. Troubled yet blissful. A little grip was loosened as he felt you were about to speak again.
"You talk too much shit-."
Part of you regretted said words, cause he smashed your head in the desk and dug his fingers around your hips.
"Is that so?"
Nothing had you prepared for the assailing onslaught of his hips. Fucking was a measly word compared to what he actually was doing to your poor and snug cunt.
It wasn't slapping, his hips thwacked yours with such force you were sure your cervix would be bruised and your legs wouldn't walk properly for the next few days, but as it hurt, it felt good. Too good for your own comfort. Specially when propped a leg ontop of a stool for more leverage to ruin you deeper.
A garbled moan came out your lips, before gritting your teeth together and shaking your head vehemently. He laughed in between deep growls and moans.
"Am I dulling that spark, muñeca?"
Your body lurched forwards, pussy drenched him with every remorseless push he delivered. Eyes struggling to keep on the front, but it was unavoidable to have them rolling back as your jaw slacked open.
High pitched wails rumbled out of your gaping mouth, permeating the once silent room. Two of his fingers slid in your mouth, hot breath colliding against them. They hooked forcing your mouth to keep open.
The desk shook under your weight, the room filled in with moans so sweet and delicious, unlike the many that had been under him.
You were experiencing first hand the danger. Miguel wasn't nice, he wasn't gentle. The latter made an emphasis on its own as he pulled the belt impossibly tighter. A gurgling and rasping noise came from your throat. He wasn't squeezing anymore, he was choking you.
And Dios mio, you were sure you'd die. But dying sounded way too much of a reward than staying in this awful place.
"Yes"
You hissed in between butchered pants and wheezing mewls. Mind set in welcoming the reaper as air was still cut out of your lungs. Legs too weak to keep on their own. Dizziness fogging your mind, fire engulfing your body, Your cunt slurped him in, wetness no longer an issue since he slid and out so easily.
The only indicator you still had consciousness was the little pathetic cries you did as his hips plowed you with a new intensity you didn't know possible.
He had been whispering the filthiest things into your ear, a couple of degrading words you couldn't quite hear, too busy being cock drunk and slipping in and out of consciousness.
Your torso and arms laid in between his arms and the desk, his upper body keeping you still as his hips did the whole assault. His face too snatched in a myriad of things.
Pride cause he finally got to have you and proved you wrong, lust cause you felt just like he had imagined, anger because of your previous words. He was the one that was rawing you into oblivion, had your brain turned upside down, not Gorski, and had you cumming with such an intensity it was overwhelming and too much for your brain to digest.
Too much.
The choking had your brain's fuse in a shortcut, shutting itself off for what it felt like forever, until he spilled himself inside. Renovating your walls white.
Hot cum spurted and not a single drop was wasted as he made sure you kept it inside.
His hulking figure trembled, torn in between subtle and violent spasms that shook him to his very core and raged pants that sent a shiver down your sore spine.
He finally had you and you were his. He wasn't letting you go. Not when he was about to give you a new purpose.
Being his.
---
Everything that he thought good and right blurred. Eyes filled in with tears at your state. Gone. Gone from this world, gone from him, the spark had vanished.
No
How this happened?
His mind raked through the memories, trying to find the right moment everything went to shit.
He signed a paper. A lobotomy authorization in your behalf.
No!, no!.
"Come back" He pleaded while kissing you and squeezing his hands on the joint of your head and shoulders, to pry something out of you. But nothing came.
The spark had been lost.
And so were you.
"Please, muñeca"
He sobbed and cradled you in his arms, but there was no push, no retaliation, nothing. Only a lovely vessel of his love.
You were gone. For real.
He had been so naive to believe that fucking you senseless meant to have you. He had been such a fool to fall for such a simple thing as that.
And now he had lost you. His own hand brought his demise. Guards and Gorski dragged him out, his hand latched on to you, but even your skin felt different.
"Poppy!"
He yelled but you didn't answer. Just watched him with a look that shattered his heart.
You were free. Free and far far away.
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