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stagefoureddiediaz · 6 months

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I’m literally sitting here with a rainstorm raging around me thinking about every single relationship (of any type) of Eddie’s that we’ve been shown. And I hope this makes sense after my app deleted what I had previously written for this meta!

Nearly every single one of them has been easy for him - except for a few, those with Buck, his father, Taylor and Josh (and arguably Ana which is a whole other interesting conversation point that I'll get to!) I'm not going to go into the Buck and Eddie relationship and its lack of ease - its a whole post on its own and I want to focus on the other aspects of Eddies journey through these other relationships he has.

Because he easily befriends Hen and Chim, there’s an easy relationship that develops with Bobby, and even with Athena. We’ve seen an easy friendship between him and Karen, easy friendships grow with the people at dispatch (lindaand May espeically). We saw an easy friendship with Michael (and David) and then at the firehouse with Lena, with Ravi and with Lucy (the two minutes of it we saw!)

He has a good realtionship with Abeula nad with Pepa - they're his family yes, but the show takes the time to show us that their relationships are close and good ones.

He even makes friends with the woman Pepa sets him up with (even if they have no further contact beyond that awkward date it was still friendly and reads like they could’ve pursued a friendship if they had wanted to beyond that meeting) even Marisol is easy and requires very little effort or energy on his part.

Even with Shannon - there might be a bit of suspicion initally, but he falls back into bed with her pretty easily, and then back into some form of a relationship with her. He re-finds that magic and it’s pretty easy for him, even if what we see heavily implies its all surface level and sex.

And now we have Tommy and this easy friendship that just clicks, but more on that a bit later.

If we look at the difficult or more complicated relationships he has, well they tell their own story and the subtext is delicious.

Let's start with Ramon. It not an easy relationship and Eddie feels a lot of resentment towards him. There are a million heart metaphors in play around this relationship and the moment we see it being repaired and beginning to heal is telling. Eddie has spent his entire journey through fatherhood scared of ending up the same type of father as his own and the moment he recognises and accepts that he isn't following the same path and that he doesn't have to/wont in the future, is the moment we see it heal and Eddie is able to move forward. from then on we're shown that relationship as being in a much more positive light and we see his own relationship with Chris improve as well.

Ramon is a mirror for Eddie and fatherhood.

Then there is Ana - while they had a good initial meeting it quickly turned sour when Chris fell of the skateboard and got injured. Ana stops being Christophers teacher and leaves the school and then when they meet back up in s4 it became easy once they’d cleared the air - but easy in the fact that Eddies heart wasn't really in it and he was ultimately sticking it out or Chris.

I find the Ana thing interesting because there is the fact that it doesn’t read to the audience like Eddie would’ve pursued anything with her had he not been pushed by his friends. and this plays into the theme surrounding Ana - she is a parallel of Shannon.

From what we know from what Eddie has told us - he met Shannon and it was magic, then she got pregnant so they go married, Eddie signs up and things turn sour. Eddie gets injured and comes home - they are at loggerheads with one another until she leaves. then they meet back up again once Eddie has moved to LA an they fall back into bed with one another and essentially pick back up their relationship. its easy, but again they are not truky in it for themselves or each other - they're sticking it out for Chris.

See where I'm going - the ups and downs of Eddie and Ana's relationship hits the same points at the same moments as Eddie nad Shannons relationship did.

So like Ramon, Ana is a mirror, just she is a mirror to Shannon rather than Eddie himself. Because the moment Eddie breaks up with Ana is also the moment he accepts the reality of his relationship with Shannon was about Christopher rather than about himself. from then on we see him building a more positive experience about Shannon for Christopher (we know as an audience that they have probably been talking about Shannon etc, but its actually from this moment on when we are shown it - its when start to see pictures of Shannon more explicitly being shown in the Diaz house outside of Christophers bedroom)

Then there is the Taylor Kelly of it all and this one is a fascinating one to me. Eddie dislikes Taylor because she is pretty damn similar to Helena Diaz. I know that sounds a bit far fetched, but they have the same personality traits and hit similar beats. Taylor is loud and forceful, her personality is domineering and we are shown her taking over and or inserting herself into every scene scene she's at and into places she does't belong. She has next to no qualms about throwing people under the bus for her own benefit and to ensure she stays the centre of attention.

Helena is the same - pretty much every scene we see her in she pulls focus she is domineering and controls the conversations and the narratives. She thinks she knows best and inserts herself into places she shouldn't be (the scene from Eddie begins where she sends Eddie back to get a juice box for Chris is a prime example of this and its implied by Shannons reaction and words that its a common occurrence) even down to making all the food for Ramon's retirement party because she doesn't trust the caterers. She, like Taylor, has no qualms throwing people under the bus to be the centre of attention - even her own son - at her husbands retirement party - an event manifestly not about her and yet she makes it about her.

And the thing is Ramon, personality wise, is very similar to Buck. This is particularly true when it comes to his relationship with Taylor - it mirrors Ramon a fair amount - going along with Taylors wants and needs rather than his own and allowing her to control things. Letting her be the centre of attention and dominate the relationship. The fact that things come to a head with her in the same episode (hero complex) as Eddie begins to reconcile with his father and we are shown Helena throwing Eddie under the bus (in the same way Taylor did with Buck (I can't reiterate enough this is in the very same episode).

One of the reasons I personally think Eddie dislikes Taylor as intensely as he does is because of these similarities between Ramon and Buck and Helena and Taylor. I couldn't say if its on a conscious or subconscious level, but Eddie knows that his parents marriage isn't perhaps an especially happy or good one, that they are fundamentally not really right for one another. I think he perhaps sees his father as downtrodden and under the thumb of his mother and that he's essentially trapped and won't get out because it's too late and he doesn't want that for Buck. Like I said its not necessarily on a conscious level, but it makes sense with the context we have that even if he isn't fully cognisant of his feelings/ the depth of his feelings for Buck, the last thing he would want is for his friend to become a shell of himself in the way his father has at the hands of a woman who is exactly like his mother.

This is such a choice by the show to parallel Ramon and Buck, especially if you entertain the concept of people marrying versions of their parents (generally taken as men marrying women similar to their mothers but it can also be applied to a queer relationship and the idea of a queer man marrying a man who is similar to his father), so Eddie ending up in a romantic relationship with Buck would play into this as a trope/ concept - one that I would actually love the show to explore.

Finally - Eddie has a difficult relationship with Josh at dispatch that we never really truly see resolved. So as far as we know, while the last time they interacted showed them in a slightly more friendly light, it was still evident that they are not friends and there is still tension there. the reason this is super interesting is that Josh is the only single gay guy on the show (and is loosely friends with buck and the show riffed on the idea of Maddie setting them up) and because Eddie hasn’t reckoned with his queerness yet, he can’t become friends with Josh. If the show continues the way it has - reconciling those relationships that are not easy for Eddie once he has accepted/confronted/ reckoned with that aspect of himself, I think we might see him become friends with Josh once he’s actually accepted he’s gay!

The fact that the Josh relationship hasn't been resolved is what makes this friendship Eddie has struck up with Tommy so interesting - it's looking like its going to play out along a similar (extended over multiple episodes) line to the Buck/Red friendship for Eddie (I'm not going into the Buck aspects of Tommys appearance in this meta). Its about Eddie reckoning with himself so all the dialogue that has seriously queer undertones to it and the directorial choices of bro high fives etc that are all just a little too much and trying a little too hard - its all about Eddie facing up to himself and looking in the mirror and accepting all the parts of himself.

#I don't know if attempt no 2 is as coherant as atempt 1 wasbut at least this one has made it to posting!#i'm fascinated by the various relationships Eddie has and how they play in to aspects of himself #an putting these aspects to bed when he has confronted them #Eddies various relationships #its just endlessly interesting!#911 spoilers #eddie diaz #evan buckley #tommy kinard #meta #long post #911 meta #911 abc #shannon diaz #helena diaz #ramon diaz #josh russo #ana flores #taylor kelly

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seriously-buck · 2 years

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Eddie's scenes in Texas in 5x17 really hit me hard, because I never really considered part of his trauma might involve being an eldest sibling who had to help raise Sophia and Adriana. I am an eldest sibling who had to help raise my two siblings, and when Eddie brought up getting in trouble for burning food he was trying to make for his sisters, I instantly knew what feelings would compel a young Eddie to try to cook for them. It speaks to a level of neglect that the show barely touched, in my opinion. It's when you know that if you, a child, don't find a way to make food, your siblings will go hungry.

This is often not happening in a "can you watch your siblings?/here are the things you will need to feed them/here are emergency numbers, etc." situation. (Or at least, it wasn't for me.) It's often a situation where an assumption is made that you will take care of your siblings at any given moment, with little parental thought put into their needs being met, and perhaps less thought to yours. But eldest siblings don't have time to think of their own needs when smaller children are looking to them for sustenance and care. Eddie learned from a young age that his needs were less important than everyone else’s.

When a child is put in this position, they learn to anticipate the needs and wants of others, because their siblings aren't old enough to communicate them clearly. (I once had to walk my littlest brother to school in the snow wearing shorts because no one told me that I would be getting him ready for school, or that he didn't have any clean pants; I'd found out while trying to get him dressed. I carried him both ways so his legs would stay warm, and then I taught myself how to do laundry. I felt entirely responsible for this incident for a long time.) Eddie is such a caregiver in his adult life, and I think we could definitely say some of that originated here, in his childhood, where he was a primary caregiver for his siblings. Eddie is good at assessing what people need without them explicitly telling him, and that is a learned skill. But Eddie doesn't give himself any credit for this skill, because he's never felt good enough regardless of how hard he tries, and he absolutely hasn’t considered his own needs for most of his adult life, because he learned from a young age that his needs were unimportant.

Eddie was told from a young age to "man up," so he tried to. Ramon granted him the agency one would grant an adult when it came to his siblings' care, but then left no space for mistakes. I know how much being responsible for young lives at that age takes a toll on someone, but I cannot begin to imagine how harmful it would be if someone had yelled at me for the mistakes I made while trying to do it. Because Eddie feels like he can't do anything right, he never has enough time, and he is never enough. We could only guess the root of all of this before—seeing his parents act this way toward him as an adult in 3x15 was a hint—but now we know it stemmed from this childhood hurt of not being seen as man enough to support his family, even though he was expected to be.

The negative feelings of this sort of dynamic run deep. Eddie resents his father, but he turned that resentment toward himself (for not being good enough at compensating for his father's neglect) for so long that he never learned how to shut it off. It explains his prickliness toward his father and the deep, internal self loathing that we find him confronting in therapy this season. Because Eddie carried this with him his entire adult life. He never felt good enough for Christopher, for Shannon or for his job.

In light of all of this, the choice to have Eddie and Ramon start to reconcile is a powerful one. I say start to because I would love to see some follow through on Ramon's part before I would call that a resounding success. It takes so much work to be able to air your grievances to your parents; we got to see Buck do it and now we've gotten to see Eddie do it. We've already seen Buck's parents fail to meet him halfway, but the message that the airing itself is a powerful tool for healing was loud. Even though we know Buck has some steps to take still on his healing journey, just taking that step of voicing the trauma inflicted upon him in childhood was a great start. I would love for Eddie's story to go the other direction though, for him to get the support from his father that he always felt was out of reach.

I don't think we'll get a true acknowledgement of how neglectful Eddie's parents were when he was growing up. (I say parents because I don't think there is sufficient proof that Helena was providing the parenting they needed in Ramon's absence.) I think we clearly see Ramon's regret over the situation during his talk with Eddie, but to acknowledge something like that fully is to sit drowning in a long-past failure you cannot have a hope of fixing. He can't change what happened, but if he can be better for Eddie now, maybe that could be enough.

The more important aspect for Eddie is that he can finally start to believe that what happened wasn't his fault. He can finally start to believe that as a child, taking care of his family wasn't something he failed at, but something he should never have had to do. He can start to see the ways in which he has succeeded at providing over the years, and he can move toward a brighter future with the family he has built, with or without his father's support.

#eddie diaz #hero complex #911 #just feeling too many feelings about eddie's trauma #don't mind me

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half-bakedboy · 3 years

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he is your heart (and you are his) (read on ao3)

Pairing: Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz Rated: Teen Summary: Eddie couldn’t remember why he was flicking aimlessly through the blank channels on the television. He couldn’t remember getting to his house. That wasn’t… right.

A knock on the door echoed in his ears like a gunshot.

“Shannon?”

Or... What happened in Eddie's subconscious after being shot changed everything for the better.

Eddie couldn’t remember why he was flicking aimlessly through the blank channels on the television. He couldn’t remember getting to his house. That wasn’t… right. He turned off the screen so he could focus and glanced around the room, barely recognizing what surrounded him. The photos that should have been on the wall were blurred, but even when he blinked his eyes repeatedly, his vision didn’t clear.

A knock on the door echoed in his ears like a gunshot.

He stood up and walked over mindlessly, reaching out his hands in front of him to slide his index finger through the splatter of what looked like blood on the back of the door. He leaned forward and through the peephole was the last person he had ever expected to see. He threw the door open, uncaring for the mess it might have made when it hit the wall, and tears rushed to his eyes.

“Shannon?”

“Eddie,” she said, her voice like music to his ears.

He pulled her in, wrapping his arms around her and pressing his nose into her neck, breathing in the scent of cinnamon and… burning rubber? He shot back, holding her shoulders tightly as he took in her presence. She was standing right in front of him, looking as beautiful as the day he met her. In fact, she looked exactly as she did the day he met her, white sundress and all.

“What’s going on? Why are you— How are you here?” he asked, breathless. He tried to hold in the sobs that threatened to burst out of his mouth, the pressure on his chest almost too much to bear.

“Because you needed me, silly. Can we sit? We’re going to miss the show!”

Her smile lit up the room, as it always had, and she pulled him toward the couch, joy never faltering even as he hesitated to follow her. When they sat, she laced their fingers together and pulled them up to her mouth, kissing the back of his hand gently. She rested them back on her lap and turned toward the television as if waiting for the black screen to light up on its own.

“You have to turn it on, Eddie. Christopher isn’t going to wait forever,” she noted, patting his shoulder lightly.

“Where is Christopher? Where am I?” Eddie stared unblinking at Shannon as if she would disappear if he looked away. “How are you here, Shan?” he asked again, pleading through a barely contained sob.

“We have to watch the show, okay?” she urged again, eyes still unblinking as she stared. “Eddie, we don’t have much time.” Even though her voice sounded pleading, the smile stayed wide on her lips.

“Okay, what do I do?”

Without waiting for an answer, he grabbed the remote and pressed the power button. The TV sprang to life and the telltale sound of a baby crying resounded through the room. There was a hospital room on screen and doctors he recognized surrounded Shannon’s bedside. He even saw himself on the other side of the bed, tears of joy springing to his eyes.

“God, he was so small. Do you remember him being that small?” Shannon asked, leaning her head onto Eddie’s shoulder.

“He was six pounds, two ounces of pure love,” Eddie said and Shannon nodded in response. “He’s almost up to my shoulders now, you know. I swear he’s going to be taller than me,” Eddie noted with a laugh.

“He gets that from my side of the family,” Shannon responded. Eddie leaned over to kiss the top of her head as the screen switched.

Christopher was six years old, Eddie remembered. He had surprised his family by being home for Christmas and he and Shannon spent the entire week fighting. He remembered how much Shannon resented him for coming back for such a short amount of time. Every time he came back meant she would have to watch him leave again and she didn’t think that was fair to her.

“It wasn’t, but we made it through,” Shannon said. He didn’t think he was speaking out loud, but he didn’t allow himself to put much thought into how she knew what he was thinking.

“We made it through and Christopher still talks about that Christmas like nothing bad ever happened.”

Eddie remembered that he had brought it up a few months ago. He still had the coloring books Shannon had bought him and the stones for his rock collection Eddie had found in Afghanistan. He loved that Christmas and looked back on it fondly, not as the last one before his mom left, but as the one he spent with the woman he admired most.

“Who’s this?” Shannon asked as another memory popped into view.

It was Ana.

Eddie’s heart warmed. She was sitting on the couch with Christopher leaning into her side and Eddie just a few feet away, leaning against the doorframe to watch them. Christopher seemed happy and Ana was as content as one could be. She was reading him a story, one that Christopher had picked out because she apparently sounded like the female character looked, and Eddie was listening and admiring, just taking it all in.

“She’s really good with him.”

There was no jealousy or sadness in her tone, just… quiet observation.

“She’s wonderful, but—” Eddie choked on something in his throat, but pushed the feeling aside in favor of turning toward Shannon again. “She’s not you, Shan.”

Shannon’s laughter was bright but she looked understanding when she reached over to cup Eddie’s cheek in her hand.

“Of course she isn’t, Eddie. If she was, no one would allow you to keep dating her,” she noted, a hint of sarcasm in her tone that almost had Eddie chuckling.

“It wouldn’t matter what they thought, you know that,” he said instead, pressing his hand over hers.

“You are stubborn. It’s part of why I fell in love with you.”

“You always were the one to knock me down when I got too high and put me back in my place, weren’t you?”

A few memories filtered across the screen of the first time Eddie had met Shannon and their first few dates up until he asked her to marry him. It had been one of the most incredible days of his life, only matched by the arrival of Christopher and maybe when he started at the one-eighteen.

“As I was saying,” Shannon began, making sure Eddie was staring into her eyes. They looked exactly how he remembered them but maybe just a little less sadness and more peace in them than before. “No matter what you do, Eddie, Ana is never going to be me.”

“I know that, I—” She silenced him with a finger on his lips.

“Because as much as you loved me—and I know that you did, I never doubted that for a second—we were never meant to be together. You never wanted me the way that I wanted you and that was only solidified between us once Christopher arrived.”

“What does that mean? I always wanted you, Shannon. I’d take you back in a moment if I could,” Eddie pleaded, closing his eyes and breathing her in, hoping that if he just focused enough he could stay with her forever.

“You stayed with me because you thought that’s what was best for Christopher and I stayed with you because I didn’t think I could ever find another man that would choose him one thousand times over.” She took a breath and ran her thumb over his eyebrow, a source of comfort she always provided to both him and their son when they needed it.

“Christopher is everything,” Eddie whispered.

“He is, but that doesn’t mean you have to set what you deserve aside. He has the biggest heart because of you, Eddie, which means sometimes, you have to follow your own above his.”

Be sure you’re following your own heart, not Christopher’s, okay?

Eddie hiccuped, “I just— I miss you so much.”

He pressed their foreheads together, holding onto her face as tightly as he could without hurting her.

“I miss you, too, Eddie. But keep watching, okay?” Shannon urged, pressing her palm against his cheek and pushing his face back toward the television.

He didn’t care what was on the TV, though, because he wanted to look at her . He wanted to take her in; the floral dress she was wearing seemed to blow in the nonexistent wind and her wavy hair framed her sharp jaw, softening her features and making her look almost angelic. He wanted to gaze into her eyes and see the light in them that he had watched dim to nothing only a few years prior.

He didn’t care what was on the screen, he just wanted—

“Christopher!”

Buck.

The crack in his best friend’s voice had Eddie’s eyes glued to the television again. Buck was covered in dirt and drenched to the bone. He was trembling and his skin was red and raw. He had a limp in his walk but he kept pushing forward.

“Christopher!”

“No, I— I don’t want to see this,” Eddie begged.

He grabbed the remote and pressed whatever buttons he could, but the remote he thought he grabbed wasn’t that at all. It was Christopher’s glasses, shattered in his hand. He dropped them like they burned his skin and suddenly his arm was on fire, burning deep into his core. He screamed and held onto Shannon’s hand tighter, squeezing so hard that it must have hurt her. She didn’t even flinch.

“You have to, Eddie. You have to keep watching,” Shannon urged.

Eddie loved her smile and while it usually calmed him down and settled the nerves under his skin, that time it caused fear to tingle down his spine instead.

“Why? Why are you here, Shannon?” he asked; pleaded.

“Look!” she said with a laugh. “I used to love playing I-Spy with Christopher. He would always figure out exactly what I was spying so quickly because he was so smart. He is the smartest kid, isn’t he?” Shannon asked, leaning back against Eddie as if to try and calm him down.

Eddie watched as Buck wrapped his arm around Christopher’s shoulder and pointed up at a building halfway underwater. They were on a firetruck, that much Eddie noticed. He could see the bright red through the grimy water and the yellow stripes of Christopher’s shirt stood out starkly against it. His son was grinning up at the building, too focused on whatever Buck was pointing at and saying to notice the flood of bodies moving behind them.

“Why are you showing me this? Why are we watching this?” Eddie closed his eyes to try and stop the tears that threatened to fall again.

“Because Eddie, you’ve never been good at following your heart,” Shannon said with a shake of her head. “You always listen to your brain and make decisions you deem as logical without letting what your heart is screaming at you have any say.”

“That’s not true,” Eddie began, but Shannon cut him off with a raise of her eyebrows.

“Your brain made the choice to enlist even though your heart told you to stay with me and your son.”

“That’s not fair,” he sobbed, bringing her hand up to his lips and letting his lips rest on her skin. “I had to do what was best for our family, for Christopher.”

“Did you ever think that what’s best for Christopher might be having a father who shows him that he can follow his heart? That what’s best for you might be exactly what Christopher needs?” Shannon asked.

At that moment, memories of Buck flashed across the screen.

Buck with Christopher. Buck with Eddie. All three of them together, like a family.

He watched his son and Buck skateboarding, surfing, picking up groceries, at the movies, out to dinner, grabbing ice cream, going to a baseball game. Everything under the sun that they had all done together played across the screen. There were moments that went on longer where Buck had picked up Christopher from Abuela’s house and soft kisses on cheeks were exchanged with those Eddie cared about most. There were clips of Buck helping Christopher with his math homework even though he had no idea what he was doing and showing up with stacks of books on whatever interested Christopher that week.

Eddie had to look away or risk his heart bursting out of his chest.

“Keep watching,” Shannon whispered, her smile widening. “This is my favorite part.”

Her favorite was apparently their moments alone, just Buck and Eddie existing without any other cares in the world. In each one, Eddie could see his feelings bright as day on his face and hoped it wasn’t as obvious as it looked on the television. He knew how he felt—it was almost impossible to avoid it—but to see it on screen as clear as day was almost hard to watch.

He could see how much he wanted with everything in him to reach out and pull Buck into a hug when he was sad or hurt. And when Buck was so happy he didn’t know how to contain the smile on his face, Eddie grinned right back like nothing could possibly bring them down. His eyes shone when Buck so much as glanced in his direction and when possible, Eddie was pressed right against his side as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

His heart seemed to explode inside of his chest at the small gestures of love he saw between them. He leaned forward in his seat, loosening his grip on Shannon’s hand subconsciously as comfort flooded through him. He yearned to reach out to the screen and put himself back in front of Buck, finally take the chance to touch him a little more than platonically or kiss him like he had meant to for the last two years.

Then he recoiled and his heart shattered into a million tiny pieces, the pain in his shoulder radiating throughout his entire body at what he saw next.

He watched himself stare, barely any emotion on his face when Buck was crushed beneath the ladder truck and saw his own face fall into panic as Buck coughed up blood at Athena’s house, eyes locked with Eddie’s like a silent plea for help. He blinked away tears while Buck dug at the mud that had trapped Eddie underground, screaming and sobbing his name as Bobby pulled him to comfort.

The last memory seemed to move in slow motion. One second he was standing in front of the ambulance that was bringing Charlie to safety and then next, Buck was covered in blood. He looked as if he had seen a ghost and all Eddie wanted to do was reach out to him and make sure he was okay. There was so much blood.

Eddie reached toward the screen and everything went black.

“What happened? Shannon, what’s going on?” he asked, grabbing for the remote again but that time, cold metal was in its place.

The gun was too heavy in his hand and he felt wrong to be holding it in the home he had worked so hard to keep his horrible, violent past out of. Before he could discard the weapon, it went off. He flinched, checking himself for injury before he saw the blood darkening the white sleeve of Shannon’s dress. Eddie pressed at the wound instinctively with his palm, grabbing the closest thing in reach to put pressure on it.

An eerily familiar white shirt.

“Shannon?! Shannon! Oh my god, Shannon. I got you, I’m here, okay? I got you,” he pleaded, holding onto her smiling face with one hand while keeping pressure on the hole in her chest. He sobbed over her, tears streaming down his face and his stomach twisting in fear.

When the shirt had soaked through, he pulled it away to change it, but the gaping wound was gone. It was like it never existed. The blood still stained her dress, but instead of a puddle of red, it was splattered across her chest and face, small droplets that fell down her cheeks like tears. She reached out to touch over his heart and when she did, her fingers grazed a bullet-sized hole in his own shoulder.

He found himself unable to breathe as she laughed joyfully in front of him.

“Can’t you see, Eddie?” Shannon asked excitedly, practically bouncing where she sat.

“See what?” he pleaded.

“He is your heart, Eddie. And you are his. He needs you.”

“I can’t breathe, I can’t— Shannon, wait,” he broke off, panicked as she started fading right in front of him. “No, no, no! Please, don’t go. I can’t do this without you,” he begged.

He didn’t care for the way his shoulder seized in pain or how his heart bled out of his chest, his uniform covered in the sticky substance that would never wash away. He didn’t want her to go, not yet. He had so many questions, so many things he wanted to say to her, to make sure she knew.

“I know, Eddie. I miss you, I love you, I would give anything for you to come with me,” she said, running her thumb over his eyebrow again before cupping his jaw in her hand, “but I know of two—and a lot more—people who miss you right now and who love you more than I can even begin to show you.”

“I’m scared, Shan,” Eddie admitted, leaning into her touch even as it drifted away. She was practically a ghost, cool touch and transparent skin, in front of him. “What if I can’t do this without you?” he asked, frozen.

“You have been,” she said simply. “Now, go. Think about what we’ve talked about, okay? You deserve to be just as happy as you’ve made our son.”

Eddie wanted to hold onto her tighter, stop her from floating through the front door because he knew he would never see her again, not like that. He didn’t want to lose the memory of her smile or the way she felt against his hands now that it was so clear in his mind. He stood up to follow her, but behind him, he heard a voice.

He heard Buck.

He wandered down the hallway until he stood in Christopher’s doorway, watching Buck sit next to his son, a worried look on his face like he was holding back tears. Eddie wanted to wipe them away and wondered why he was crying. He hated seeing Buck sad.

“You know, your dad is, uh... he's tough as nails. He's a fighter, right?” Buck said to Christopher. He sniffed back emotion and Eddie kneeled in front of them.

“Hey, I’m okay, I’m right here. I’m not fighting anymore,” Eddie reminded them, but neither looked away from each other. They had no idea he was there.

“So, uh, he—he’s with the doctors now,” Buck explained. Eddie tilted his head as the pain in his shoulder increased minutely.

“Like the ones that fixed you?” Christopher asked. The smile on his face looked just like the one on Shannon’s and Eddie’s heart squeezed in his chest. He tried to reach out but he couldn’t move his arms.

Why couldn’t he move his arms?

“Uh-huh, yeah. Like the ones who fixed me,” Buck agreed.

After a few brief moments of silence, Christopher asked, “Then he's gonna be okay, right?”

“I’m going to be fine, Christopher. I would never leave you. I would never leave either of you,” Eddie said firmly.

As he tried to stand, to pull the two of them close and remind them that he was right there, the pain in his shoulder intensified and a heavy weight pressed down on his chest. He felt like he was being ripped in half and he screamed in pain as an invisible force started to pull him toward the door.

“No! Not them, too! I won’t leave them!” Eddie swore, grabbing onto the doorframe as Buck’s phone chimed in his hand. When he opened the message, a breath of relief pushed from his lungs and he smiled for the first time since Eddie had walked into the room.

“Yeah, I think so, buddy. I think so.”

As Eddie let go of the frame, his screams intermingled with the sobs that poured from Buck’s mouth.

“It’s gonna be okay, Buck.”

If Christopher said it, Eddie had to believe it.

--------------------------

He woke up slowly, the telltale sounds of machines whirring and beeping solidifying what he already knew. He was in a hospital room and he was hurt, badly if the pain radiating throughout his entire body said anything.

“You gonna stay awake this time?” Ana asked. She pulled his hand to her mouth and kissed his knuckles gently, taking a deep, relieved breath. “You gave all of us quite the scare, Edmundo.”

“What happened? I— Is Charlie okay? Buck, he— There was blood. He was covered, is he—?”

Ana was already pressing a hand to his chest to keep him laying down before he could even think about getting up. His eyes scanned the room but he only saw Ana. He hated how disappointed that made him. She deserved more than that.

“Charlie is okay, Buck is okay. Everyone is okay,” Ana said slowly, pushing his hair back from his sweaty forehead gently. “Charlie is up in the pediatric ward until the social worker comes by. He’s going to be staying with me when he’s out,” she noted.

“You’re going to foster him?”

Ana nodded and said, “I’ve thought about it before, but something about him just pushed me to my decision. His mom is getting the help she needs and they think she’s going to be okay to reunify with him at the end of it. It’d be nice to have some company, you know?”

“I didn’t know you had thought about that. I didn’t realize—”

“Buck saved your life,” she said quickly as if she was ripping off a bandaid from a wound she wasn’t sure was healed.

“He did?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah, he did.”

He pressed his eyes together and tried to remember what had happened. He felt the sting in his shoulder and the numbness that followed. He saw the bright red blood splattered across Buck’s face and soaking his stark white shirt. He felt the rough concrete scraping against his back and the insurmountable worry when he regained consciousness and Buck was still covered in blood.

“I need to…” He wasn’t exactly sure what he needed to do, but Ana was already smiling softly over at him.

“He’s on his way. I called him when you woke up about fifteen minutes ago but you know how L.A. traffic can be,” Ana explained.

“Why isn’t he here? Where’s Christopher?” He glanced up at the clock and realized it was after the time he was supposed to be home to relieve Carla. “Did anyone check on him? Carla was supposed to—”

“Eddie, it’s been three days.” His heart sank. “Between Carla and Buck, they had it covered.”

“Oh,” he breathed, running a hand over his face. “Ana, I—”

“I’ve never heard someone so worried for another person before,” she interrupted. “When Buck called me, I was sure you were dead,” she said almost conversationally.

“It always seems that way,” Eddie explained. He remembered watching his friends, his army family, be injured in the line of duty. Every one had the worst-case scenario flashing through his mind first and foremost.

“You don’t understand, Eddie,” she began, squeezing his hand a little tighter. “When Buck called me, I had to console him. I had to calm him down enough so that he could actually tell me what was going on. I was worried, of course, but Buck? He was devastated. ”

“He’s my—”

"If you say best friend I swear to God I’m walking out of this room without saying another word,” Ana threatened. Eddie kept his mouth shut. “I have to ask… Did you know that he’s in love with you?”

Eddie thought about the question. Did he? Wasn’t he sure that Buck would never leave him and Christopher’s lives, so positive he made Buck the legal guardian of his son in case of his demise? Wasn’t he positive that Buck was the one taking care of Christopher at that very moment, not worried about his son because he knew he didn’t have to be? Wasn’t that the love that Shannon told him all about?

“I don’t think either of us knew,” he said honestly. He couldn’t look at her, opting instead to focus on the IV dripping what he thought must have been morphine into his arm. “I’m sorry, Ana.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Eddie. Moments like this put things into perspective. You weren’t the only one who made some realizations the last few days,” Ana said with a small laugh. When Eddie sent her a questioning gaze, she explained, “I always thought I needed a husband in order to have a family. That’s what I was taught growing up, what society has pushed on me. It was the only way I thought I would ever have worth.”

“That’s not true,” Eddie interjected, running his thumb over the back of her hand.

“I know that now. I could have fallen in love with you. I could have married you and been a parent to your child, but I don’t know if that would have ever made me happy. What I’m about to do, with Charlie? That’s what I’ve always wanted. To open my home to those in need while still maintaining the independence I didn’t think I could have.”

“You’re incredible, Ana Flores, you know that?” Eddie asked, reaching up to stroke her hair gently. “Any person would be lucky to have you in their life in whatever way you want them,” he noted, “and I hope that doesn’t mean we can’t…” He trailed off in hopes that she would fill in the blanks to what he was thinking.

“I will always be there for you and Christopher.” After a moment, she added, “And Buck.”

Eddie laughed, “Yeah, I guess we are more of a package deal than I originally thought.”

“It would be great for both of you to talk, maybe… now?” she asked, glancing through the glass that surrounded them.

That’s when Buck came into view. He ran down the hallway like he was running to a scene, his breath panting out of him as he stopped at the door, the brightest smile Eddie had ever seen tugging at the corner of his lips.

“Hey, Buck,” Eddie whispered.

“Hey,” Buck responded, relief clear even with only one word.

“I’m going to get going,” Ana said as she stood. She leaned over and pressed a kiss between Eddie’s eyebrows and then his cheek before whispering, “Remember what I said, okay?” He nodded and kissed her right back, holding her hand until she was far enough away that he had to drop it.

She walked over to Buck and pulled him into a tight hug, pushing up on her toes to whisper something in his ear as well. Eddie couldn’t hear what she said, but the shock on Buck’s face was enough to have him pressing his lips together to contain a laugh. She patted his cheek gently as she pulled away and turned enough to shoot a quick wink in Eddie’s direction before walking out the door.

Buck stood where he was for a second, seemingly thinking about whatever Ana had said to him, but Eddie didn’t like him so far away.

“I’m okay, Buck, thanks to you, I’ve heard,” he said, holding out a hand and smiling when Buck instantly took a few steps forward, taking it in his own.

They had never held hands before—at least, not out of happiness instead of hurt—but somehow it felt right. It felt like they had done it a million times before and would do it every chance they got in the future.

“You know, I’ve always been worried about you running into fires or being lowered into wells, but being shot was never on my radar,” Buck said as an attempt at humor. Eddie laughed but Buck couldn’t seem to make the sound. “I wasn’t sure I was going to get you out of there and then once I did, I wasn’t sure I could keep you alive,” Buck whispered, his voice cracking with emotion.

“Hey,” Eddie said, urging Buck to look at him with a squeeze of his hand, “I’m okay.” He repeated the words even though they were obvious. “I’m more than okay, Buck. I— I saw Shannon,” he said quickly.

When he expected Buck to stare at him like he was insane, Buck just tilted his head in worry.

“How is she?” he asked and Eddie fell just a little more in love.

“She’s still beautiful, happier, I think. She still knows how to put me in my place,” Eddie commented.

“Well, someone has to when you’re unconscious and I can’t do it,” Buck retorted, smacking Eddie’s hand playfully.

“She, uh, showed me a lot of… she made things more clear for me. About myself, about… well, you.”

“Yeah? What about me?” he asked. Eddie recognized that hopeful tone and it healed him more than rest ever would.

“She said that I don’t follow my heart and that I listen to the logical part of my brain more than I should,” Eddie noted. He could tell Buck wanted to agree, but he stayed silent, nodding for Eddie to continue. “She made me realize that I’ve spent so much time making decisions for Christopher, I never stopped to think about what I deserve.”

“What Christopher needs is the most important,” Buck pointed out.

And suddenly, he understood what Shannon meant a little more. Eddie would choose Christopher one thousand times over, but so would Buck. His heart matched the size of Christopher’s and Buck had given it to both his son and Eddie from the moment they met.

Buck was Eddie’s heart and he deserved to finally follow it.

“I love you,” Eddie blurted out. “I love the way that you love my son and the way that I know you love me. What Christopher needs is more important, but I guess we’re pretty lucky,” he noted.

“Why is that?” Buck asked, that hope still shining in his face as he leaned closer as if he couldn’t control it.

“Because what Christopher and I both need is you.”

And it really was that simple.

When he kissed Buck, it was like all the pieces of the puzzle slotted into place and what everyone else had apparently already known was made as clear as day to the two of them. Eddie didn’t want to pull away, but he had no say in it when Buck pulled his head back and sent Eddie an inquisitive look.

“So, your ex-wife and ex-girlfriend really did all this, huh?” Buck teased.

“Shut up,” Eddie said with a roll of his eyes.

What he knew Buck heard, though, was I love you, I’m never leaving you, I need you in my life forever, and I’ll try not to get hurt again.

And Eddie was grateful Buck said as much right back.

#buddie #buddie fic #evan buckley #eddie diaz #shannon diaz #911 #911 on fox #911 fic #my writing #i am so proud of this one #i hope you all enjoy it #<3 <3 <3 <3 #buddiefanfiction

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caitlesshea · 3 years

Text

love slipped beyond your reaches

Buck and Eddie are separated. Can an accident help them find their way back to each other?

“Papa!”

Buck startles at the sound of Christopher’s scream, only for it to be followed up by the cries from his sister CiCi.

“Shit,” Buck whispers as he and Hen run outside to see what happened.

“CiCi? Chris? What happened?” Buck asks as Hen looks over CiCi, who’s cradling her wrist.

“She fell,” Chris says, barely holding it together. Even though he’s fifteen, seeing his baby sister hurt isn’t easy.

“Looks like it’s broken, Buckaroo.”

“You sure?” Buck asks as he pulls CiCi closer to him. Hen nods.

“Go. I’ll watch Chris, and I’ll bring him by later when you’re home.

“Okay. Thank you.” Buck scoops up CiCi, even though she’s five.

“Chris?”

“Go, Papa, we’ll be fine,” Chris says simply and comes up to kiss CiCi’s forehead. “Plus Denny and I wanted to try this new game.”

“Or you both could do your homework,” Hen responds and they groan. “Go, Buck.”

“Alright. C’mon CiCi, hospital for you, sweetie.”

“Papa, no.”

“I’m sorry, baby. Your wrist looks broken.”

CiCi just cries some more as he puts her into her booster seat.

Buck drives them to the hospital, heart aching for CiCi, and for Chris and Denny having to witness her falling.

Buck’s going to have to tell Eddie, knowing he can’t keep this from him, even if he’s on shift.

When they pull up to the hospital and finally get checked in, Buck pulls out his phone.

To Eddie: CiCi fell on her wrist when we were at Hen’s. Took her to the ER. Chris is still at Hen’s, will update you when we see a dr

He leaves the text like that, hopeful they aren’t on a call and Eddie will respond sooner rather than later.

He isn’t looking forward to seeing him sooner than scheduled, with the kids spending the last two days with Buck, and would be until it was his turn to be on shift.

“Papa, my arm hurts,” CiCi whines into his side.

“I know, baby. Hopefully we see the doctor soon.”

Buck puts a hand against his forehead, chastising himself for thinking of himself when his daughter probably has a broken wrist.

Even though he and Eddie separated nearly nine months ago, it doesn’t make it any easier to see each other, especially in a situation where one of the kids is hurt.

“Cecilia Buckey-Diaz?”

“That’s us,” Buck says back to the nurse and picks up CiCi.

When they take her to X-ray, Buck calls Maddie, after seeing no response from Eddie.

“Hey, baby brother,” Maddie greets cheerfully.

“Hey, Mads.”

“What’s wrong?” Maddie asks immediately and Buck nearly breaks down.

“CiCi fell, we’re at the hospital, broken wrist.”

“Oh no, poor kid. Where’s Chris?”

“Still at Hen’s.”

“Have you told Eddie?”

“I texted him,” Buck responds hotly.

“Evan,” Maddie scolds.

“What?”

“You need to call him, she’s his daughter, too.”

“You think I don’t know that,” Buck snaps and then winces at his tone. “Shit, I’m sorry Maddie. You’re right, I’ll call.”

“Good. Let me know how it goes with CiCi, too. I can stop over and bring dinner later?”

“No, don’t worry about it, thanks though.”

“Love you, Ev.”

“Love you, too, Mads.”

Buck hangs up, more wrung out than he was before the call, and plays with his phone, debating on whether or not to call Eddie.

Before he can decide they’ve wheeled CiCi back from X-ray and Buck smiles.

“Hi, baby.”

“Papa,” CiCi whines tiredly.

“The doctor will be in soon to go over the X-rays and discuss next steps.”

“Thank you.” Buck helps CiCi back up onto the bed, running his fingers through her hair as she rests.

By the time she falls asleep the doctor is telling them that she did break her wrist and she’ll need a cast for six weeks.

Buck wakes her up so she can pick a color. Just as she chooses pink, Eddie rushes into the room.

“Evan?”

“Hey, she’s okay. Broken wrist. They’re putting the cast on now,” Buck placates.

Eddie shoots him a dark look as he moves toward the bed. As soon as CiCi sees him she lights up.

“Daddy! They’re giving me a pink cast.”

“I see that, sweetheart.” Eddie sits in the other chair and holds CiCi’s other hand, the two of them chatting about what happened.

Buck bites his tongue because if he doesn’t he’ll say something like ‘you could’ve texted me back’ or some other snarky remark that won’t help matters.

He doesn’t know when their easy conversations and flirty banter turned into biting remarks and heated words.

He almost wishes they yelled at each other, away from the kids, of course, but yelling might get them somewhere other than dirty looks and resentment.

“Alright, Mr. Buckley-Diaz, she’s good to go. Tylenol for the pain, but that should go away in a day or two. Watch for fevers, don’t get the cast wet. You know the drill,” The doctor says to both of them and hands Buck a packet of care instructions.

“Thank you.”

“No problem.” The doctor smiles. “We’ll see you back to take this off next month.”

Buck helps CiCi get down off the bed while Eddie grabs their things.

“I’ll take her home if you wouldn’t mind picking up Chris?” Buck asks as he gets CiCi buckled into the Jeep.

“Sure. I’ll bring him to you.”

“Thanks.”

Buck turns away as Eddie kisses CiCi’s forehead, promising he’ll see her soon.

“C’mon, let’s go home.”

“I want pizza for dinner, Papa.”

Buck snorts. “Fine, but only because you got hurt.”

CiCi smiles and Buck breathes for the first time in what feels like hours.

When they get home Buck sets CiCi up on the couch while he orders pizza. He orders Eddie’s favorites, too, figuring he’ll want to stay for a little bit.

Buck looks around at his small house, something he rents for cheap while they figure out how to separate their finances.

It hurts his heart to think of their home and how Eddie still lives there. It was only right, after all, it was Eddie’s place first. When it was just him and Chris.

Buck isn’t sure he has a safe space anymore.

He’s brought out of his musings by the sound of a key turning in the door, signaling Eddie is back with Chris.

Chris waves to him and makes a beeline for CiCi, absolutely thrilled that he’s the first to sign her new cast.

Buck turns and looks at Eddie, who’s standing there looking out of place in Buck’s home.

And isn’t that a punch to the gut.

Eddie’s staring at some of the pictures that line the wall, eyes fixated on one of the four of them.

“The kids…” Buck clears his throat. “They wanted to hang that photo.”

Buck doesn’t know why he’s explaining himself. It’s his house and both Chris and CiCi had been adamant about having at least one photo of Eddie. Chris also has a picture of Shannon in his room.

Eddie doesn’t say anything, just nods and shoves his hands in his pockets. A sure sign that he’s either nervous or annoyed. Probably both.

“I, uh, ordered pizza. I figured you’d want to stay?”

“Yeah, if that’s okay?”

“It is. I just have to finish up some of the dinners for tomorrow, so you can?”

“I’ll stay in the kitchen, I think Chris wants time with her.”

“Sure. Drink?” Buck rubs his hands on his pants as he grabs two beers and hands one to Eddie.

They haven’t talked just the two of them in a long time and Buck isn’t sure what to say. He busies himself with finishing up the last two dishes he was going to send with the kids to Eddie’s tomorrow.

“Thanks,” Eddie clears his throat. “For cooking.”

“Of course. Don’t want the kids to starve.”

It’s not a lie, of course, but it makes Buck feel useful, cooking for his family. Even if Eddie doesn’t want him anymore at least he still likes his cooking.

“Right.”

“Hen said, uh…” Eddie pauses and then shakes his head. “We can redo the playdate in a couple of weeks.”

“Yeah, I was texting her. Thanks.”

Buck sticks one lasagna in the fridge and gets to work on the chicken pasta. He can feel Eddie staring at him, as his neck prickles with awareness.

Where he’d once welcomed that scrutiny now it just makes him feel anxious.

“We should,” Buck clears his throat. “Maybe we can do family dinners once a week, Sunday’s?”

“Oh, you’d want to?”

“The kids have mentioned it, since we both have a couple of hours before my night shift on Sundays.”

It’s not a total lie. The kids have asked for family dinners, and he feels like tonight will only bring on more questions. But, he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t also wanting them.

“Sure. Yeah, I think we could do that.”

“Really?” Buck asks, shocked that Eddie agreed.

“Well only if you’re cooking.”

Buck snorts. “Of course.”

Eddie laughs and the familiar banter makes Buck pause. This is the longest they’ve gone without snapping at each other in such a long time that Buck almost forgot what Eddie sounds like when he’s laughing.

“What happened to us?” Buck asks quietly after a moment.

“Evan.”

“I’m serious,” Buck turns around so he’s facing Eddie, mindful of the kids in the living room. “We never used to fight, it never used to feel like I couldn’t breathe around you.”

“I don’t know.”

“But you do know, Eddie.” Buck stares at Eddie, waiting.

“It just got overwhelming. Chris’ latest surgery, him going to college, the home improvements, CiCi needing braces. I felt like we were drowning. I know we weren’t but it was too much and I started snapping at you and then I couldn’t stop.”

Buck knew that. He knew most of that, but to hear it laid out, so clearly, makes his heart hurt.

“I’m not saying I move back in, even though finances are tight, but maybe a counselor…”

“I’ll do it.”

“Wait, really?”

“Evan. I hate that I can’t talk to you anymore, more so after you left, and I want to.”

“Okay.”

“Yeah?” Eddie asks and Buck’s feeling hopeful.

“Yeah, but you’re taking me on a date first.”

Buck smiles at Eddie and waits for him to answer.

“Deal.”

#buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911 on fox #angst with a happy ending

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bandsanitizer · 5 years

Text

After 3x05, specifically The Market Scene™️, I’m pretty convinced that Buddie is going to happen and I don’t just mean it from a “Eddie misses Buck” perspective.

(Under the cut because it’s a long post.)

With the first valid reason toxic masculinity just ain’t it for Eddie’s anger towards Buck being “Christopher misses you”, it is established that Eddie sees Buck as responsible for Christopher to some degree. Whether this is conscious or not, the statement implies that Buck’s important to Christopher’s well-being AND Buck should be/is aware of that.

This isn’t a statement of, “Hey can you visit Christopher?” It’s one that implicitly questions why Buck would do something that causes Christopher to feel that way. The whole argument, in fact, is over why Buck would follow through with the lawsuit, given the consequences. It says that Buck should known better. It says that Buck should’ve thought more— Thought more about Christopher.

There is canon evidence of Eddie holding resentment towards 2 people when it comes to the treatment, and lack of communication and involvement with Christopher, prior to the episode.

Who? Shannon and himself, aka Christopher’s two parents.

Eddie expresses, maybe more implies, regrets towards being deployed after Christopher’s birth, in the Christmas episode. He also showcases resentment towards the fact that Shannon left, mainly in terms of her leaving and not contacting Christopher.

And look what we have here: Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley leaving Christopher behind and cutting off contact with him and Eddie.

“Oh, but Buck’s not his parent.”

Here’s the thing, though. For all that canon dynamics and dialogue implies, Buck is a parental figure in Christopher’s life and Eddie sees that.

I lack specifics of canon moments, but Buck is with Eddie to pick-up Christopher in several accounts. Eddie seems initially pretty trusting of Buck’s recommendation of Carla because it’s Buck. Buck coming along for Santa pictures. Eddie has Buck watch Christopher, despite Buck being in a not-so-good mental state, which implicates a trust that Buck will put Christopher first, enough to get out of his head.

Y’know the whole debate of whether or not Buck has stuff to do when Eddie gets him out of bed at the beginning of the season? That is followed up with Christopher hanging out with Buck and Eddie needing someone to watch Christopher. While never explicitly stated, watching Christopher is the thing that Buck is getting up to do. Eddie couldn’t have possibly been sure that Buck would be ready/up for it. Thus, it showcases Eddie’s trust that Buck will be able to put the stuff behind him for the sake of being a good caretaker of Christopher while Eddie cannot.

This trust is, then, explicitly stated at the end of 3x03. The whole “there’s no one in this world i trust more with my son than you”.

That’s not shit you just tell your friend and parents are, often, not people to use their kids flippantly. This isn’t something that Eddie would just say for the sake of cheering up Buck. That’s not the kind of parent Eddie is. It’s something that Eddie truly feels. There’s a trust with Christopher that Eddie has with Buck that’s unlike the trust he places in anyone else.

It’s the trust that Buck is going to protect Christopher, that Buck is going to put Christopher first, and that Buck would do whatever it takes to ensure Christopher’s safety. It’s implied by the conversation happening when it does, after Buck, hurt and injured, out there searching for Christopher the moment he lost him in the tsunami. Eddie expressing his trust then, having Buck, again watch Christopher partially for Buck’s own mental health, and Eddie thanking Buck for not giving up, showcases that Eddie truly believes that Buck will put Christopher first.

Which is an extremely parental trait, emphasized by the way that Eddie puts Christopher first. It’s also a trait that is usually one of, if not the, most important traits in a single parent’s potential S/O. They have to be able to understand that their child and their child’s well-being comes first. So Buck, displaying that, makes him the front-runner for potential romantic interest for Eddie, at least from a writing perspective.

And this trust Eddie has in Buck, is what leads to Eddie’s anger and frustration.

We’ve basically only seen Eddie angry once prior to the market fight, and that’s when he beats up a guy for insulting Christopher. Yes, it’s initially about the parking space, but for the most part, it’s not extremely heated and more of “I’m sick of people like this”, until Christopher is involved. It establishes pretty solid grounds of what truly makes Eddie snap.

Now fastforward to the market scene and guess what most of Eddie’s anger at Buck centers around? The inability for Eddie to depend on Buck for Christopher’s best-interest. Not in the sense that Buck has other responsibilities, but the implication the conscious choice of the lawsuit has in terms of Buck not caring or not prioritizing Christopher enough. Eddie is angry because all that trust he put in Buck to put Christopher first, to be good for Christopher? It’s been betrayed

If Buck cannot think about how his actions affect Christopher, then Eddie cannot trust Buck with Christopher. Which, again, as friends it’s not the end of the world. It’s not the kind of responsibility you expect from a friend.

However, it’s one you’d expect from an S/O or parental figure, or at least someone trying to be. While it’s Eddie being protective of Christopher, it also speaks volumes of how Eddie views Buck. Eddie pushes for Buck to see how self-centered he’s being. Eddie is arguing for the fact that Buck needs to see the repercussions this has on people other than himself, mainly Christopher. It’s pushing for responsibility and, in regards to Christopher, a more parental view.

Eddie likely wouldn’t push it if he hadn’t initially expected more from Buck—expected Buck to not be so self-centric as to forego thinking how it would impact Christopher. Eddie brings up Christopher, not just because Eddie is Christopher’s dad, but because Eddie knows that Buck gives a shit. Eddie knows that despite Buck’s choices, saying that is going to hurt Buck and make him rethink what he’s done.

It’s grounds for Buck reassessing his choices and ability to put Christopher first, or at least have concern towards his best-interests. It’s also an insight into Eddie’s dependence upon Buck in a way that showcases that Eddie sees Buck as a parental figure in Christopher’s life.

Which, again, romance isn’t necessary, but the effort to achieve said dynamic would be wasted if there wasn’t a relationship pursued here. Additionally, Buck’s guilt and the bringing up of Christopher lays grounds for a resolutory scene between Christopher and Buck, and Buck and Eddie.

In the same way that Eddie wouldn’t have brought up Christopher if he didn’t have expectations for Buck, there’s no reason for Buck to have responded as he did, if the show wasn’t at least going to give a resolving scene.

Buck’s immediate guilt and suggestion to see Christopher, lawsuit be damned, is grounds to show that Buck hurting/foregoing to think about how it would affect Christopher was not intentional. It actually, is something closer to Buck not having realised that this would affect Christopher this way. It’s a way of establishing that, no Eddie is wrong, Buck does care about Christopher. It’s a very desperate call to save what trust Eddie has left with Buck and for Buck to reestablish any sort of presence in Christopher’s life.

It’s very much akin to the major conflicts in romantic plots with single parents in any media. There’s the initial lack of trust, the establishment of trust, an unintentional but damning breaking of said trust, the talk about what the trust implies, and the slow rebuilding of said trust.

Buck, if written true to his character, will fight for a moment to apologize and fix his relationship with Christopher. This will reestablish trust there. As for with Eddie, given Buck asks about him at the end of the episode, there’s some basis for Buck having a major role in helping Eddie’s whole rage arc. Especially, given that Eddie was the one to help Buck at the beginning of the season with his own mental struggles. This will, then, allow for talking and for the reestablishment of trust between Eddie and Buck.

That last part is mostly hypothetical, but this show, I’d say, is pretty good with foreshadowing and manipulation of trailers, and following through with plots. As such, given the effort they’ve put into building the dynamics between Eddie, Buck, and Christopher, along with the subsequent but quick change in said relationship in the past episode, the ground for the development of Buddie into a canon romantic relationship is there.

While neither Buck nor Eddie are necessarily in the place to have the introduction of a new romantic interest, this entire conflict would need to end with a tattered relationship in order for any character to be established as a love interest for Eddie that surpasses Buck, literally the person Eddie trusts with Christopher the most. This would take a while, or some miracle, to establish, but would be necessary because that’s an incredibly necessary trait for single-parent potential partners. They have to be the best for the kid. Whoever Eddie does end up with needs to be the best person to and for Christopher.

And despite everything, it’s still Buck. It’s still Buck because, as said previously, Buck’s initial reaction to Eddie’s reasoning is guilt, and to see Christopher and make things right. This is the only immediate action to resolve things that Buck’s has in regards to anyone hurt by his lawsuit. Granted, Christopher is a kid and not the 118, but the fact stands.

There’s too much preestablished, too much implied, and too much effort put into Eddie, Buck, and Christopher’s relationship for the writers to pursue anything different. Like it would be poor follow-through/planning to randomly establish a love interest for either character at this point.

Eddie’s view of Buck as a parental figure to Christopher, along with the Buck’s responsibility in concerns to Christopher that Buck’s guilt implies (along with the tsunami plot), makes for a basis of potential Buddie. One that might not happen by mid-season 3, but definitely possible, and very very likely.

There’s so much established dynamic and complexity there, that I believe Buddie has a good basis after the episode, and honestly the show would be terrible writers, writers with inability to cohesively develop plots, if Buddie didn’t become canon.

#does it make sense? idk #i rambled #its not as coherent as I wanted but maybe people will still get it #this is what exams season does to my brain #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #christopher diaz #911 fox #911 spoilers #since we’re all hopping on the ‘this is either going to be canon or i might actually sue’

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eddycurrents · 6 years

Photo

For the week of 7 January 2019

Quick Bits:

Aliens: Dust to Dust #4 concludes this series from Gabriel Hardman, Rain Beredo, and Michael Heisler. It’s been very good, capturing the feel and atmosphere of the first two Alien films and delivering a very taut horror-thriller. Absolutely gorgeous artwork from Hardman and Beredo.

| Published by Dark Horse

Atomic Robo: Dawn of a New Era #1 isn’t a bad jumping on point. It doesn’t really get you up to speed on the past of the series, but you also don’t really need to have read any of it to enjoy this story. Great humour and interesting tidbits of science and history as usual from Brian Clevinger, Scott Wegener, Shannon Murphy, and Jeff Powell.

| Published by IDW

Avengers #12 works to build up Black Panther’s “Agents of Wakanda” to serve as a support network for information and grunt work throughout the world to feed the Avengers team proper. It’s an interesting use of otherwise lesser-used characters from Jason Aaron and definitely broadens the scope of the overall series.

| Published by Marvel

Barbarella/Dejah Thoris #1 is a very good beginning to this series from Leah Williams, Germán García, Addison Duke, and Crank!. Williams captures the tone and feel of both characters very well through their dialogue and the artwork from García and Duke is impressive.

| Published by Dynamite

Batman #62 is the second part of “Knightmares”, which near as I can tell is going to be a series of one-off stories by an array of brilliant artists with Batman as filtered through some strange psycho-thriller lens (or at least the first two parts adhere to that ethos). It’s good, but it’s weird. Great art from Mitch Gerads as Tom King keeps us off balance and at arms length with the narrative confusion.

| Published by DC Comics

Birthright #35 concludes this arc with an epic battle between Brennan and Mikey, as Brennan confronts his family, cutting deep into the resentment that Brennan has felt for his brother. The art from Andrei Bressan and Adriano Lucas is amazing.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Bitter Root #3 continues to be thoroughly excellent in every conceivable way, presenting a compelling mystery in the origins of the Jinoo, an interesting family drama delving into more of the history and interpersonal foibles of the Sangerye family, and it’s just an entertaining supernatural schlockfest on top of all of that. David F. Walker, Chuck Brown, Sanford Greene, Rico Renzi, and Clayton Cowles are delivering one hell of a story here. Oh, and the art from Greene and Renzi is stunning.

| Published by Image

The Black Order #3 shifts to the perspective of Black Dwarf here, and like the first issue, plays off a narrative that is contrary to what you’d expect. Where Glaive thought himself a comedian, Black Dwarf is more contemplative, wondering if his thoughts and desires are who he is, or if he’s merely the brute that others see. It’s interesting, even as it continues the ongoing plot of trying to destroy the Sinnarian Empire.

| Published by Marvel

By Night #7 takes an interesting turn as Heather’s father and uncle take a moment to act as exterminators and she and Jane try to rescue Barney from a mob boss. Love the humour as always from John Allison’s script, especially as he adds some unexpected elements. Very nice design and presentation of the bug from Eidolon by Christine Larsen and Sarah Stern.

| Published Boom Entertainment / BOOM! Box

Captain Marvel #1 is a fun relaunch, perfectly mixing humour, action, and interpersonal drama as Kelly Thompson, Carmen Carnero, Tamra Bonvillain, and Clayton Cowles bring Carol back to New York. Beautiful colours throughout from Bonvillain, really making Carnero’s line art shine.

| Published by Marvel

Criminal #1 is a very welcome return to the Lawless family, as Ed Brubaker, Sean Phillips, and Jacob Phillips weave a tale of Ricky stealing an old thief’s necklace trying to bail Teeg out of jail, only to wind up in even more hot water than he began in. You don’t need to have read any of the previous volumes of Criminal before, but I still highly recommend that you do since they’re awesome.

| Published by Image

The Curse of Brimstone #10 gives us some more answers as Annie confronts Wandering Jack to get information on the Salesman and to figure out a way to possibly save her brother. This is still a weird series, but Justin Jordan, Eduardo Pansica, Júlio Ferreira, Rain Beredo, and Wes Abbott have definitely been making it interesting.

| Published by DC Comics

Deathstroke #39 gears us up for the conclusion next issue by positing that from Slade’s point of view what he’s claimed happened actually did happen, as the disparate threads converge. It’s interesting as to how Priest has been staging this story.

| Published by DC Comics

Die #2 is brilliant. As good as the first issue was, and it was really damn good, this one is even better as we get the exposed to some of the rules of this fantasy world and thrown headlong into the seamless world building of this realm. Kieron Gillen, Stephanie Hans, and Clayton Cowles have something truly magical here, taking a childhood love of science fiction and fantasy, and subverting it into something that can hurt us like weaponized nostalgia. It is absolutely stunning.

| Published by Image

Faith: Dreamside #4 is a very strong conclusion to this mini from Jody Houser, MJ Kim, Jordie Bellaire, and Dave Sharpe. The entire series has looked good, but Kim and Bellaire really take it to another level with this finale, the confrontation of Belu is just incredible.

| Published by Valiant

The Freeze #2 is probably better than the first issue and it was an incredibly debut, from Dan Wickline, Phillip Sevy, and Troy Peteri. I absolutely love that the focus isn’t on the freeze itself or what caused it, and is instead about the people living in the world and the problems that this kind of apocalypse could cause. It’s smart and leads to some very compelling character drama and complications.

| Published by Image / Top Cow

Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #1 is amazing. Spectacular even. This is a very heartfelt and humorous debut from Tom Taylor, Juann Cabal, Nolan Woodard, and Travis Lanham that takes Spider-Man down to the local level, spotlighting his, well, neighbourhood. There’s also a back-up from Taylor, Marcelo Ferreira, Roberto Poggi, Jim Campbell, and Lanham that could well be a game-changer.

| Published by Marvel

The Green Lantern #3 continues to be one hell of trip from Grant Morrison, Liam Sharp, Steve Oliff, and Tom Orzechowski. It still feels like something out of a different time, but that’s part of what really makes this work.

| Published by DC Comics

Gunning for Hits #1 is a pretty dense beginning to what’s apparently a crime drama mixed with the music industry, not at all like Empire because I know that’s probably what many would think. It’s seedier, grittier, down at the street level, but as I say, this is dense. This first issue has a lot of narration, a lot of dialogue, and a great number of pages that more or less outline how signing deals work in a how-to format. It’s unique, blending some of the hallmarks of something like an autobio comic with a more standard narrative approach. I’m definitely looking forward to seeing what Jeff Rougvie, Moritat, and Casey Silver do for a second number.

| Published by Image

Hit-Girl #12 is the bloody conclusion to Rafael Scavone, Rafael Albuquerque, Marcel Maiolo, and Clem Robins’ “Rome” arc with Mindy and Paola confronting the corrupt convent. Absolutely beautiful artwork from Albuquerque and Maiolo, with even time for one last twist in the tale.

| Published by Image

House Amok #4 features some very impressive artwork from Shawn McManus and Lee Loughridge as the story takes and interesting path as it heads towards the conclusion. Christopher Sebela has been giving us an interesting look at this world through Dylan as the scales fell from her eyes, but this one makes us wonder, what if the family isn’t really crazy.

| Published by IDW / Black Crown

Justice League #15 heats things up on Hawkworld with a very interesting revelation about Shayera and Thanagar Prime, along with a deeper mystery about the multiverse. It really makes me wonder what James Tynion IV and Scott Snyder are getting at. Gorgeous art throughout from Jim Cheung, Stephen Segovia, Mark Morales, Tomeu Morey, and Wil Quintana.

| Published by DC Comics

The Last Siege #8 is the brutal conclusion to this series that has been a practical masterclass in storytelling, from character development through pacing, atmosphere and execution. This series has just been incredible. Landry Q. Walker, Justin Greenwood, Brad Simpson, and Patrick Brosseau stick the landing with one hell of a finale.

| Published by Image

Man Without Fear #2 continues to tear Matt Murdock apart as he finds ways not to deal very well with being hit by a truck. And gives in to fear. Great art from Stefano Landini and Andres Mossa as Matt’s nightmares come to life.

| Published by Marvel

Martian Manhunter #2 continues to be a bit of a slow burn, parcelling out a bit about the in-story present and then delving into more about J’onn’s past on Mars, building up Martian culture and what they were taking from Earth even in our ancient past. The art from Riley Rossmo and Ivan Plascencia is amazing.

| Published by DC Comics

Miles Morales: Spider-Man #2 is another great issue as Miles and the Rhino team-up to track down the missing kids. Saladin Ahmed does an amazing job of humanizing Rhino and making us empathize with his plight. The art from Javier Garrón and David Curiel is again very impressive.

| Published by Marvel

Moth & Whisper #5 concludes this series from Ted Anderson, Jen Hickman, and Marshall Dillon. While it does bring the story to a satisfying resolution, it still leaves open the door for more to come, which I’d love to see.

| Published by AfterShock

Murder Falcon #4 delivers some pretty big revelations as the reunited Brooticus faces off against Magnum Khaos. It goes about as well as you’d expect. Daniel Warren Johnson, Mike Spicer, and Rus Wooton are really nailing the heartfelt character beats in amongst the over-the-top monster battles.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Oblivion Song #11 deals with the fallout of Ed’s transference of another piece of Philly over to Oblivion. Gorgeous artwork as always from Lorenzo De Felici and Annalisa Leoni, particularly during the creature battles.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Outer Darkness #3 continues to show us how this universe works as the crew try to salvage a derelict vessel on a supposedly barren rock. This mix of horror and science fiction is wonderful and John Layman, Afu Chan, and Pat Brosseau are really creating something unique here.

| Published by Image / Skybound

The Punisher #6 begins the next leg of Frank’s ongoing nightmares with the first part of “War in Bagalia” from Matthew Rosenberg, Szymon Kudranski, Antonio Fabela, and Cory Petit. I’ve really been enjoying what Rosenberg has been doing since the “War Machine” arc and it just seems to be getting better. There’s some really intriguing things about a nation run by Baron Zemo here.

| Published by Marvel

Red Sonja #25 ends this volume with another one-off tale with Red Sonja ferrying a musician to a ship on the coast from Amy Chu, Erik Burnham, Carlos Gomez, Mohan, and Taylor Esposito. It’s a curious story of longing for home that allows for a little bit of reflection on the series, but it doesn’t ruminate on it long.

| Published by Dynamite

Self/Made #2 doesn’t have the luxury of the twist of the first issue, so has to work harder to get past that “I see dead people” Sixth Sense moment, and, really, it does. This is just a damned good story, playing with sci-fi and fantasy elements, blended seamlessly due to it all being a representation of game development. Mat Groom, Eduardo Ferigato, Marcelo Costa, and Troy Peteri are doing some great work here.

| Published by Image

Sleepless #11 brings all of the plots and machinations to an end as Sarah Vaughn, Leila Del Duca, Alissa Sallah, Gabe Fischer, and Deron Bennett bring the series to an end. Some very interesting bits of tradition, change, and resentment towards monarchy.

| Published by Image

Spider-Gwen: Ghost Spider #4 is an epilogue to the “Spider-Geddon” event, paying tribute and burying the fallen. It’s a very haunting story, making you wonder if Gwen’s going to take a darker turn in the future. Seanan McGuire, Rosi Kämpe, Takeshi Miyazawa, Ian Herring, and Clayton Cowles do a wonderful saying goodbye to various parts of the Spider-Verse.

| Published by Marvel

Star Wars: Age of Republic - Jango Fett #1 is this week’s one-shot exploring various characters around the Star Wars canon. Jody Houser, Luke Ross, Java Tartaglia, and Travis Lanham give us a decent story of betrayal and consequences with Jango and Boba Fett.

| Published by Marvel

Star Wars Adventures: Destroyer Down #3 concludes this mini from Scott Beatty, Derek Charm, Jon Sommariva, Sean Parsons, Matt Herms, and Tom B. Long. It’s been interesting to see the two time periods of the stories play against one other with events in the past informing those in the present.

| Published by IDW

Thor #9 is somewhat of a companion piece to this week’s Avengers #12, setting up Roz Solomon as another Agent of Wakanda, but you don’t need to read both of them to enjoy them individually. This one delivers a lot of information on what’s going on in regards to the build up of the “War of the Realms” in addition to giving Roz a new purpose and changed outlook. Gorgeous artwork from Mike del Mundo.

| Published by Marvel

Turok #1 is an entertaining reimagining of the series from Ron Marz, Roberto Castro, Salvatore Aiala, and Troy Peteri, somewhat in line with the original Valiant interpretation, albeit moving it forward to the late 1800′s. Quite like the art from Castro and Aiala. Castro’s art reminds me a bit of a cross between Joe Kubert, Bart Sears, and Jordi Bernet.

| Published by Dynamite

United States vs. Murder Inc. #5 paints a very bleak picture for the next stage in the US government’s war against the crime families following the assassination of the President. Wonderful work on tone and atmosphere from Brian Michael Bendis, Michael Avon Oeming, Taki Soma, and Carlos M. Mangual.

| Published by DC Comics / Jinxworld

Web of Venom: Venom Unleashed #1 is a pair of tales spotlighting the new dog-form of the symbiote as he chases down people infected by Carnage, then Cletus’ perspective on it, from Ryan Stegman, Kyle Hotz, Juan Gedeon, Marc Deering, Scott Hanna, Livesay, Roberto Poggi, Victor Olazaba, Dan Brown, Matt Yackey, Andrew Crossley, Carlos Cabrera, and Clayton Cowles. Really nice to see Hotz’s art here.

| Published by Marvel

William Gibson’s Alien 3 #3 has the crap hit the proverbial fan as meddling with the xenomorphs begins to bear its deadly fruit. Johnnie Christmas, Tamra Bonvillain, and Nate Piekos are doing such an amazing job at adapting this for comics, it makes me kind of sad that it wasn’t the direction the films took.

| Published by Dark Horse

Wizard Beach #2 continues the fun of the first issue, with Hex trying to get off the beach, build himself a castle, and hunt down tasty, delicious rats for lunch to no avail. Nice bits of humour and the introduction of a girl who Hex might well be smitten with, as well as a darker mystery involving her grandfather’s wand. Great art from Conor Nolan, Chad Lewis, and Meg Casey.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

The Wrong Earth #5 has both of the dimension-displaced Dragonflies(flymen) continue to attempt to get back to their respective homes. Also, through flashbacks and monologues, I kind of get the impression that Tom Peyer is trying to tell us that both of them are thoroughly insane. There’s also the usual back-up comic and prose text pieces to round out the issue.

| Published by Ahoy

Young Justice #1 is the launch vehicle of the new Brian Michael Bendis-driven Wonder Comics line. If you look at it from a perspective of DC’s continuity, it’s probably very confusing. Many of the characters seem to be in their pre-New 52, even potentially pre-Infinite Crisis forms, Gemworld is attacking, Amethyst seems particularly bloodthirsty, and we’ve got a couple of inexplicable legacy characters in Jinny Hex and Teen Lantern, but...I think that confusion, that chaos and frenetic energy, is part of the point, since at the onset, the invaders from Gemworld are aware of the shifts in the multiverse. So maybe give it a chance to develop from there are clue us in on what’s ultimately going on? Regardless, there’s gorgeous action, interesting layouts, and fascinating design work from Patrick Gleason and Alejandro Sanchez.

| Published by DC Comics / Wonder Comics

Other Highlights: Auntie Agatha’s Home for Wayward Rabbits #3, Black Dahlia, Blackbird #4, Cemetery Beach #5, Curse Words #19, The Dreaming #5, DuckTales #16, Euthanauts #5, Go Go Power Rangers #16, God of War #3, Hack/Slash vs. Chaos! #2, Joe Golem: The Drowning City #5, Kick-Ass #11, LaGuardia #2, The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: The Tempest #4, Patience! Conviction! Revenge! #5, Predator: Hunters II #4, Prodigy #2, Rose #16, Star Wars #59, Unbeatable Squirrel Girl #40, Vampirella/Dejah Thoris #4

Recommended Collections: Dread Gods, Eclipse - Volume 3, Lucy Dreaming, Modern Fantasy, Star Wars: Doctor Aphra - Volume 4: Catastrophe Con, Tomb Raider - Volume 4: Inferno

Housekeeping: You can check out my review of the hardcover of Rick Geary’s Black Dahlia here.

Also, every Monday, I’ve been providing a selection for my comic of the week for Batman’s Bookcase. The latest was a look at Jason Aaron, Mahmud Asrar, Matthew Wilson, and Travis Lanham’s excellent Conan the Barbarian #1. Read it here.

d. emerson eddy is too hot to handle, too cold to hold, he’s not a Ghostbuster, and he’s not in control. Please somebody put him back into his cage and into some kind of climate controlled environment.

#This Week in Comics

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