#novelty dice

[rottingraisins]

novelty dicemaker fanart from a bit back,, was listening to polyhedrons from the disco elysium soundtrack and was right back in that chimney w/ her

[disco-dancing-in-the-desert]

[juniesfairies]

good afternoon I have two (three if you check tags) insane disco elysium rarepairs that don’t make sense at all with no information than these two screenshots for your consideration.

[kirkwallguy]

actually the thing i like the most from the merch bundle is that map... i need a nice jpeg of that thing

[gobs-o-cs]

"...and I mean, they say there's this whole 'destiny' thing that I'm supposed to follow, but, like, the gods couldn't be bothered to write down even the tiniest bit of instructions!?

Nobody knows what it is I'm supposed to be doing at all! It just feels like I have no one that I can talk to about this stuff, and it's just super-frustrating! It's just like, no one cares about me as an actual person; Y'know what I mean, Pog?"

"SPOT OF TEA, FRIEND?"

"...You're not even listening, are you?"

(Trying out some of the Hero Forge duo minis options and seeing if I can match some of the poses and gestures to the backstory scene I'm writing. Got hooked into finishing it and have definitely stayed up way too late tinkering with it)

[blabbin]

Neha's been workin in that chimney for 14 years,, thinkin about baby Cuno walking through the whole lively commercial area up to her office, wanting to watch her work

((then inevitably making a mess and/or snatching shit for himself and being banned from the workshop for good lmao))

[morgue-xiiv]

Oh shit I forgot to post my Cleaning Out the Rooms montage piece here.

My first time animating anything.

https://youtu.be/U1Q-IgHnuWs

[red-catmander]

got that new chair!

those orbs were a pain to hunt, but it's done with!

the chair classic

the sexy lounge

and the uh... the... um... the ocupado...

[shegoesbyjoy]

there are so many things i didn't get to do during my initial playthrough of disco elysium that I'm so so excited to try and do in my next one I am positively giddy

like i can't think of a single other game where even after finding out what all of these tasks are my sheer desire to replay the game has not diminished even a tiny bit in fact it might be stronger?? what a feat honestly

[crowgore-throwaway]

Neha, the novelty dice maker, is so great that she gets her own ost

I love her so much

She's still only my second favorite, though

(Honorary favorite is Kim (obviously), actual favorite is Trant)

[teaboot]

One of the best parts about working at a sex shop is the employee discount, and yeah that means excellent deals on sex supplies but that's not the big brain part.

You come to my house. Something is cooking in the kitchen- it smells wonderful. What is it? It's novelty dick-shaped pasta. I've set up a sensual sexy Italian dinner. There are candles set up on the table. They're melting too fast, dripping everywhere- they're low temp waxplay pillar candles. For dessert, I serve you a delicious ice cream topped in penis-shaped rainbow confetti sprinkles and strawberry body paint drizzle, and afterwards, serve coffee with roasted hazelnut warming lube.

We play a board game while we drink. It's sexy monopoly. It's your turn. You roll the dice. They come up as 'whisper into' and 'butt'. I lost the original dice. We're using the sexy dice. You move four spaces.

After dinner, I run you a bath. A bubble bath. The bubble gel? Sensual ocean breeze. There are candles lined up around the tub. The scent is overpowering. Why? They're three-in-one fruit flavored massage oil candles. I'm using so much. It's so wasteful. Do you want to shave? I have conditioning shave cream that smells like limes. And an electric body razor, but you can't use that in the tub.

How about a bath bomb? You toss one in. It's cherry blossom scented. As it dissolves, three sexy bath sex suggestion cards fall out. They're all variations on doggy style, probably because fucking in a bathtub is probably the easiest way to break your hip.

The water cools. You get out an dry off with a novelty towel. If you wrap it around your chest, it looks like you have gigantic tatas bursting through the fabric like the Hulk.

You walk into the bedroom. I'm there, reading an instructional book titled "The Housewife's Guide To Every Day Stripping". I'm wearing a neck pillow designed to look like a massive curved weiner. Also a pair of fake leather bondage leggings and an oversized men's christmas T-shirt that says "Jingle My Bells" across the front.

I see you come in. I put down the book, take off the pillow. Offer you a massage. You accept. I already burned up all the massage candles so I pop a new bottle of CBD massage oil that says something wrong about Chakras on it. It's very gritty. That's because there's little chunks of amethyst in it for some fucking reason. It's fine, though. You say you don't mind.

I don't do massages very often. It's bad. You end up more tense than before. One of your muscles starts to cramp- it's okay. I whip out a bottle of Lidocane topical masculine performance numbing spray. You immediately feel like your shoulder went to the dentist. It's not ideal, but it's better than cramping.

You're not in the mood to bone after that. Which is good, cause I'm actually pretty asexual, but it hasn't come up yet so I'm relieved to avoid the conversation. Instead we get ready for bed. (The weather is terrible, and I insist you stay over.) I set up the futon, then realize it smells like cigarettes from the previous owner and shyly ask if you wanna cuddle in my room. You're down.

I crawl under the covers, placing my penis-shaped pink glitter pride bottle on the side table in case one of us wakes up thirsty. Once you're settled in, I turn off the glowing bare ass night light and the room goes black.

It takes a few seconds for your eyes to adjust, but when they do, you look up at the ceiling. It's dotted all over with little green flourescent lights. Are they plastic stars? No. I've pinned up a thousand glow in the dark condoms. God bless

[senatortheram]

mmmmmm yeah no I’m weak and I immediately bought the ACOC dice.

[inthewind777]

undefined

please visit VARNERAVE.com or www.varnerave.etsy.com

[gayteensupreme]

average ace attorney trial

phoenix: ah god im so nervous im so new to this

maya: we can do it nick!!! yayayayay

judge: hello i am here

edgeworth: hello i am calling my witness mr seekret murdahrer to the stand

seekret murdahrer: hi i am but an innocent witness. i saw harry willington kill that guy from my window. yes the defendant.

phoenix : oh shit uhhhh fuck i know!!! yes mr murdahrer um you claim to have seen mr willington from your apartment window and yet your apartment has no window!!!!

judge: order!!!!

edgeworth: tut tut tut you see mister wright mr murdahrer does have a window, your building plans are outdated!

phoenix: oh shit. um. i. LOOK AT THIS

judge: what the fuck is this

phoenix: this is a piece of tape! but as you can see, there is dust on this tape!! i picked it up at mr murdahrers apartment! in the dust on the tape you can see the serial number from the murder weapon!!!

seekret murdahrer: *rips off face* GAHHHHHHH fine i did it!!!!!@

judge: ORDER! anyway i find mr willington not guilty!

confetti: *falls*

maya: yayayay mr wright we did it!!!

edgeworth: Phoenix....... I Have Always Felt A Certain..... Way..... Towards You..... As If Our Lives Are Perhaps Intertwined...... This Thought Has Penetrated Me Deeply... And Yet I Find Myself Unable To Resist........

harry willington: wowowow thanks mr wright!!!! now i will go back to the novelty ninja dice factory and work there again!!!!

[mushroomates]

gandalf headcanons

hides spare pipe weed under his hat . pippin saw him do it one time. no one believes pippin.

even when he’s like- let me access my emergency stash- and pulls out a doobie from his hat. everyone’s like “woah such wizardry”

it drives pippin bonkers.

will cheat at cards, chess, checkers- has been known to enchant dice to make them weighted. again, denies

just a reminder that he canonically sleeps with eyes open. i’d also like to add that he can sleep standing up. he also does do both during long meetings sometimes.

the sleeping w eyes open particularly messes with legolas. he can’t handle prolonged eyecontact on a good day and now this wizard is staring into his soul and is only maybe conscious

sleeps on his back, stiff as a board. occasionally sits up, pauses, has a brief moment of lucidity and then goes back to bed

also sometimes talks in his sleep. in various languages. sometimes legolas is certain these languages are made up, but they’re spoken with such vigor it seems hard to believe that

you can have full conversations with him. they’re not particularly intelligent or understandable conversations but still very interesting dialogues that he does not recall in the morning. a favored topic is the inflated price of everything.

this is particularly amazing because gandalf does not pay for most things.

often things are gifted. sometimes he finds them, and keeps them as his own. more often than not he mooches off of others, and at times, has been known to take things

not steal. if you stopped him he’d give it back. but no one really has.

he just kind of. picks up something. looks at you. and walks away with it

sometimes will leave small tokens in return,, like rocks with strange runes on them or a single feather

sometimes will return the item after days, months, or years (decades, centuries)

oh i meant to give it back but then the civilization collapsed so-

he tends to favor things shaped like other things- a tea pot that is a boot, a spoon that’s shaped like a flower (evil evil EVIL) salt and pepper shakers that are little houses

also has a fascination with garden gnomes. will often take them ‘home’ as well. where do they go? who knows but they’re his now

no one knows where they go or what he does with what he acquires. a running theory is he has a secret house that no one is allowed in that’s full of weird knick-knacks

in actuality, he gives most of these things away. the garden gnomes are for tom bombadill, the weird spoons are for thranduil because he gives them to legolas and legolas HATES spoons that aren’t *spoons*

arwen is charmed by crossstich, galadriel likes weird soaps and candles, (gandalf the cheese wizard doubles as gandalf the bed bath and beyond wizard.)

saruman does not like novelty salt shakers but gandalf is convinced he does and keeps giving them to him.

on that note gandalf thinks towers are gaudy and would never have one

is very tempted to set up shop in the shire. everyone is against this idea which is why he really wants to.

Disturber Of The Peace- literally loves to uproot unsuspecting hobbits for fun

most known being the baggins, but like, he’s not above standing outside the proudfoots home with a ~mysterious~ envelope until he’s batted away with a broom or very passive aggressively dismissed

he’s like a stray cat that they need to stop feeding with adventures

there’s a list written by the thain of the shire “appropriate times to set off fireworks” . “never” and “when given explicit permission” are the only two things written. unfortunately gandalf is selectively literate

he does not, ever, know what time it is. if he does he won’t tell you-at least in a way that’s understandable to normal people

what’s the time? “it’s today” okay and when is that? “now” thanks buddy.

what times sunset? “when the moon is rising.” when’s that? “at the end of the day”

yk island time? that’s wizard time. just. no sense of any sort of time passing at all. it could be an hour or five days and he will refer to it as a minute. or vise versa. you invite him for tea on tuesday and he shows up on sunday, in the dead of night, with a hand full of seashells and covered in ash. no explanations. he leaves just as suddenly as he came, with a hermit crab in your kettle and dishes in the sink. but yeah, technically, he was there for tea on tuesday.

or arrives four weeks later because you didn’t say what tuesday.

it’s anyone’s guess, including him, what he has in his pockets. four twigs, each exactly 17 centimeters long? sure. half ball of twine wrapped around a chunk of moss? why not. three tea bags, clearly used, tied together and soaking wet. a small glass bottle with strange dust labeled “numbers”. a single tooth. reading glasses, cracked, missing a lense with a shoelace tied around the bridge. he doesn’t even wear glasses.

don’t. ever. ask him for directions. he can give you them, just. in a way that’s so alien that they’re impossible to follow

he kinda just. goes off of vibes? like if it feels like the right distance he will do with it. it’s not miles away but that sounds right

in his heart it is.

is always right. no amount of reason can convince him otherwise

at best, you’re both wrong but still. he knew it all along

rarely knows the right lyrics to things. if he’s called out he’ll just say “well in this version..” because he’s been everywhere and is ancient so no one can really argue

picks fights with a shocking large number of birds.

randomly and for seemingly no reason, in a multitude of languages most long forgotten.

[gobs-o-cs]

"Is it too much to hope that this so-called 'destiny' the gods seem to have in mind for me isn't all grim and serious and 'prim-and-proper' and 'dignified' and stuffy from here on out?"

Clara "Novelty" Morgen

(She/Her)

Tiefling? Aasimar Artificer, Artillerist

Neutral Good

Inheritor Background - Secret Heritage

[For my own purposes she would be considered fully both races. In terms of game rules if ever actually using her as a PC, the Aasimar is the more important of the heritages to be dominant for who she is. The Tasha's Cauldron Custom Lineage options don't really help to have inherent features from multiple races, unfortunately]

Dice Set #343 - The Dawn