#now that i think about it those were the first del toro movies i ever watched

[queercatboyrights]

I watched Hellboy (2004) as a kid and it completely rewrote my brain chemistry and I think that shows

[bunbunbillion]

THE BUNBUNBILLION Q1 2024 MEDIA THREAD EXTRAVAGANZA

i've been recording everything i consume for the past few months to do a media thread at the end of every quarter. and now april is over... so its time to talk about stuff!! forever!!!!!!

01/13 - Homestuck (Re-Read)

I finished re-reading Homestuck for the... 4th? 5th time? I've lost count. It's a good way to start the year though. This time around I read it with my girlfriend, who you should give all of your money too (@yinkybaginky), and it was very fun to see someones reaction to it for the first time. She knew literally nothing about Homestuck, not even what a Vriska Serket was. A truly great experience, especially thanks in part to the Unofficial Homestuck Collection. I'll probably have more to see about Homestuck in depth on a later date, so I won't bog down this post with that. It's my favorite piece of media ever, and that's all there is really to say on the matter.

01/24-01/25 - The Trolls Movies

I've been surrounded by gay people who love Trolls for the past like 5 years so I finally decided to give them a watch on a whim with my girlfriend, after catching some of the first movie in a streamers server.

They were fun! I really don't think I have much to say on them. They're kids movies, sure, but they're also just very visually great and made me go "yeah you know what some of those old pop songs WERE pretty good". I think when it came to stories I liked the first one the most just because I liked the Bergen's a lot, I thought their whole world was very well designed and all that. Don't have the most care for Branch, and Poppy is OK as a protagonist, but otherwise I had more fun with the other characters. Creature design is absolutely excellent and is what stood out to me the most of anything, though. The animation in the 3rd movie is also top notch, I really do want to see the series continue. If they do, I like the third movies approach of finding a niche to make "the thing" for the whole movie, it's a fun way of doing stuff.

We thought this shot was really funny.

1/20 - Guillermo Del Toro's Pinocchio

I was gonna watch this when it came out awhiiile ago, but just put it off forever. I saw Jacob Geller had uploaded a new video about Pinocchio, which talked about the movie and was like. Man. I wanna watch that video. Guess I'll go watch this entire movie. So I hopped into VC with Netflix on and just watched it.

It was Fucking Good!!!!!!!!!!! Every good thing you've heard about the movie is absolutely true. Do yourself a favor and just watch it. That being said, I also don't have too much to say about it! It's been a few months and it hasn't totally stuck around in my head, but that just means I get to rewatch it sometime, and I can look forward to that. It mostly made me want to watch more stop motion movies.

If I were to highlight anything, its that I love to make the movie all about death. Pinocchio as a story seems to constantly get turned into this thing all about freedom and living and how great life is and all that, but this movie completely nailed that yea. Pinocchio works so much better as a movie about death. A puppet living on a blessing against the laws of nature being used as a vessel to explore acceptance of death. It's really great.

the demons are such baddies btw

01/29 - Earthbound USA

Not the game, but the documentary put together by Jazzy Benson through Fangamer. It was absolutely fantastic. Easily my favorite game documentary I've ever watched... Because it's not really about the game.

To put into words, because I imagine 90% of people reading (not including the people I watched it with) haven't seen it or even heard of it, Earthbound USA is a documentary about specifically starmen.net and Earthbounds western fanbase.

The doc highlights basically every aspect of Earthbound in the west. They talk to the people who translated the game, who made the marketing campaign, the fans who bought the game day one, the translator of the MOTHER 3 fan translation, they talk about Earthbound Zero, about the virtual console releases, the quest to get MOTHER 3 officially localized and every single defeat that came with it, I mean Shigesato Itoi is just here too. It's everything you could ask for all combined with home videos from the early 2000s, an outstanding soundtrack that gives me goosebumps from Robbie Benson, it's just... So good.

I bought the DVD for the movie and streamed that to my friends, which you can get here on Fangamer, whenever they plan on restocking it at least. Or, you can watch it on streaming services listed on their website! If your a MOTHER fan, I'd say this is like, essential viewing. It may as well be official with how good it is.

01/29 - A Brief Retrospective of The Simpsons' Golden Age

I finished this the same day. I recorded this mostly as a joke, but hey if your insane and have watched every single Simpsons episode like me and want whats basically a Simpsons Summary Podcast, I recommend this 11-hour video.

02/06 - MOTHER

A week later I couldn't get Earthbound USA out of my head, so I decided to finally sit down and go where no MOTHER fan has gone before. To the first game in the series.

It was really really good. Like, man, I don't know why I slept on it so long just because it was an NES RPG. Ok, I mean, I know why I did, it's because it's a NES RPG, but still.

This game really highlights everything that went into its two sequels to make them so good, and has so many little unique novelties about it that make it just so so memorable. The music, the writing, the places you go, it's just... So, so good. I still think the best way to get into MOTHER is to start with Earthbound, just due to how approachable it is, but if you like it and/or MOTHER 3, do not sleep on MOTHER/Earthbound Beginnings. It's just so good.

Probably use an emulator with rewind or save-states though.

i'll be fine with not hearing magicants music anymore though

02/17 - Yakuza Kiwami 2

I started this game probably years ago, and never got that far. Yakuza 0 is definitely one of my favorite games ever, and I was kind of mixed on Yakuza Kiwami, but I was enjoying the start of Kiwami 2 for sure.

How did I feel by the end?

I mean it's not BAD, per say, it's just... Not very good, either. The gameplay never really felt like it evolved much, the writing really felt like it never picked up and just kept ADDING stuff, but at least the side quests were probably the absolute best the series has given me so far. That definitely saved it for me, but man the story. It just wasn't very good.

I had a lot more thoughts after playing it, but I think think in the end it just comes down to;

Ryuji did not get nearly enough time to shine to be an impactful villian

The bastard cop was a character I was given no reason to care for, and the focus put on him did not feel earned in any way

Kiryu really did not feel that involved with everything going on

Sayama did not get nearly enough agency in this story

As for the twists, I didn't like how many there were at first, but I think by the end there were just so many twists I was like. Yeah nvm this is so fucking stupid it owns. So good on them for that!

I don't think I'll ever replay the main story for this game, but I will absolutely come back to those side quests, they're so good I don't want to spoil a single one. I am also really enjoying Yakuza 3 so far, so that's a we might just be back regardless.

the selfie feature is really funny. you really feel like your some 40 year old dad.

02/22 - Pokemon Scarlet and Violet: The Hidden Treasures of Area Zero - Epilogue

I have a lot of thoughts on Pokemon Scarlet & Violet. I am a HUGE Pokemon freak, like omega huge freak levels of such. I will claw and bite tooth and nail defending Sword and Shield any fucking day of the week. I think Scarlet and Violet are like, painfully mid games in such a disheartening way. I still enjoyed a lot of it, but man it's so held back by... everything, really.

And the DLC fixed I'd say about none of it. In fact, I'd go as far to say the 2 DLC stories only highlight and strengthen every single problem scarvi has as a game and it disheartens me, so, so so much. Unlike the Sword and Shield epilogues, which expanded upon the best parts of the game and experimented with brand new formats as prep for the next generation, scarvi kinda just does. Nothing. It's more Scarlet and Violet, slime grease and all.

Kitakami is... Ok, I guess? It's an exceptionally uninteresting region with absolutely no landmarks that stand out in my mind. The story in it is pretty subpar, it's a really annoying kind of "player has no control over a misunderstanding" narrative in a really obnoxious way and by god I'll say it I never really get a reason to care about Kieran. He's not bad by any means, I mean he's just a kid, but really I don't feel like I'd ever call him a friend. The story with the Loyal Three and Ogrepon is really cute though, I do love that they completely flipped the story of Momotaro on its head in such a fun and unique way.

Blueberry Academy I was looking forward to much more, thinking that while Kitakami was really rushed and pretty bad, it must mean more resources were just put towards the second DLC. I was pretty wrong, it was basically just as under baked... But also still better, regardless. They introduce a lot of characters you won't really remember with this DLC, and it feels weird because it feels like there SHOULD be more to these characters, but it's all confined to a pretty short campaign.

The story is pretty ok, and I like what they did with Kieran here, but the second you beat him in the champion fight the story like, immediately halts the breaks and everything stops mattering. I really thought Drayton might've been set up as an interesting antagonist, someone subtly bullying Kieran and egging on how he is, but in the end he's just a well meaning friend who's just eccentric. All the other trainers basically disappear as well, and Kieran reverts back to how he was before all this for the most part. Then the story with Terapagos has to happen, and you get the return to Area Zero, except with your new friends you've barely built bonds with and Briar instead.

Similar to Drayton, I thought Briar might've been getting set up to be a bit fucked up. She's pretty obsessed with Area Zero and proving that Heath was right, and that feels like obvious easy set up for a villain right? Obsession is kind of the text book villain motive, especially in a series like Pokemon. But, no, like Drayton, Briar is actually exactly as she seems, and there's nothing underneath.

Unfortunetly, Area Zero itself was also not as interesting on revisit. I imagine it was the far lower budget, but it ends up mostly just being a very basic crystal-cave environment, without that really fascinating hollow-earth vibe Area Zero has in the base game. You're also mostly just traveling alone going on fetch quests to beat mini-boss Pokemon to open up gates, so that feeling of traveling an unknown place with friends is also completely lost. In the end, Terapagos isn't much of a character at all, like Ogrepon (or Miraidon/Koraidon) are, and is just kinda There. I'm sure the anime is doing a lot more with them, given they're a main character, but man they are NOTHING in this game and it's really disappointing with how incredibly hyped up they are.

In the end though, the thing I really came out loving with the second DLC was something I didn't actually know about until after finishing the epilogue, which was the brief interaction with the Professor in Kitakami once you have Terapagos. I won't spoil it, I'd recommend going to the crystal lake in Kitakami with Terapagos in your party to see it, but it was a moment where I was really like... Damn. This story really could've been something special.

NOW WITH ALL THAT OUT OF THE WAY, it was the Epilogue that I beat this year, which acts both as a bonus to the DLC, and a Mythical Pokemon event similar to ones from the DS games. And, I gotta say.

It's easily the best thing in the entire DLC, bar none.

Despite just being a revisit to Kitakami, the Epilogue is not only better written then both of the DLC chapters, but actually shows that promise for future games like the SWSH DLC did years ago. I had a smile on my face basically the entire time.

First off, hanging out with the three friends again after they basically disappear once you beat the game is so incredibly refreshing. Just having them over to your house is the first time in a Pokemon game I've actually felt that like... Oh, I'm a kid hanging out with my friends, kind of feeling. That original inspiration the Pokemon series had was just completely captured with that, and I love it, and it continues through the entire DLC. On top of that, the DLC does a lot of very small things with its cutscenes that I felt were really missing from the main game that actually completely caught me off guard. Seamless transition between overworld cutscenes, cinematic cutscenes, and battles mainly. It feels like Pokemon games have always struggled with taking you out of the story for loading screens or transitions or letting the player wander off or something. It's hard to immerse, but with this DLC just through the most simple methods they really catch you off guard with the cutscene framing and battle starts in a way I absolutely adore, especially since your with your friends who can actually Talk for you too. Helps that all of the writing is just really funny too, I had such a good time.

Overall, I think this is where I want the Pokemon series to go. The segment of Area Zero where you travel with all your friends already stood out to a lot of people, but didn't have the most writing to back it up. Similarly, this DLC has all of the writing, but it can feel like you aren't actually traveling with your friends, as they don't follow you. I think having a Pokemon game where you travel directly with other people in a bit of a party is the way to go with expanding on Pokemon as a series, and this DLC combined with base scarvi really proves How it can work. It makes me so excited to see where we can go from here, and I can only hope they learned from all these mistakes.

wow i had a fucking lot to say about scarlet and violet dlc and i didnt even mention this thing. whatever.

02/26 - Splatoon 3: Side Order

Funny story, I actually beat Splatoon 3 on a friends copy, but on my own switch, so when this DLC came out I ended up buying an entire new copy of Splatoon 3, with DLC, and an already completed save file. So was the DLC worth 80 bucks? I mean, no, not at all, but it was extremely good!!

It came out while I was out of town with my girlfriend, so we had a lot of fun playing it together, and I think it's just overall a genius idea for a Splatoon mode. It makes me like, viscerally crave an even bigger Splatoon roguelike, but I'm also like an extreme roguelike freak. The story was super cute (my big "I <3 PEARLINA" shirt notwithstanding) and basically everything it introduces is great. I haven't actually beaten the Agent 8 locker yet, because I'm Bad At Splatoon </3, but I everything else was just so good.

im actually extremely biased, btw

02/27 - Ponyo (Rewatch)

I rewatched Ponyo with my girlfriend while I was over for the first time since I was a wee little amoeba. It was so fucking cute!!!! I really do love Ghibli movies a lot. I don't think there's a lot I can say about Ponyo, per say, at least not as much as other Ghibli movies I love like Spirited Away (my fave movie evarr), but I think this movie combined with like. Finding Nemo, Animal Jam, and going to the Houston Aquarium combined are probably why I love marine biology so much now.

02/29 - Death Note

The anime, to be specific, for the first time. Yeah, I can see why this became such a big thing with fujoshis. I get it, I understand now. I'm sorry L, I didn't know your game.

Death Note is overall both an anime of its time, and an absolute classic you should be watching. It's engaging, it's dramatic, it's funny, and there's so many points where your just like "damn are they gonna bone" about the two characters the authors 100% had no intention to be seen in that way.

It's only real problems come from the authors also having no fucking clue what to do with women in the story, and making pretty annoyingly shallow characters that get sidelined really hard. The final arc is also a bit head scratching, but it makes for good drama, so I can't really complain, even if I remember a lot less of it. Great show, great ending. Where's my Misa & Rem yuri manga series.

he really is just fucking jeff the killer huh

02/29 - Promare

Watched this with my girlfriend on a whim, cus we wanted to watch a movie together. I've been a very lowkey TRIGGER studios fan since I was a kid, watching Kill la Kill when I was way too young to be watching shows that crazy boobed, but it did definitely contribute to my transgender-ness, so you can't fault it there (you can fault it for a lot of other things though). No matter what though, when TRIGGER just randomly came out with a full feature length movie released in theaters, I was pretty interested. Which is why I didn't watch it for years.

After watching it though? Yea, that was really fun. It's not much in the way of story, very basic Minority Allegory story I think, but it's all to make way for extremely crazy action scenes and homages to all their favorite mecha anime, which like, yea props they did a great job. Character design is extremely fun, environments are super colorful, animation is what you'd expect from TRIGGER (good), and there's a lot of man tits this time around. I recommend it!

03/04 - 2001: A Space Odyssey

I'll be so fucking honest I watched this on my phone on a plane ride and I don't fucking know anything that happened. I think it was good?? I think it made sense??? I really wanted to fall asleep but I really wanted to watch the movie. It felt like it was simultaneously 4 hours long and 30 minutes. I think I should probably watch it again. I don't know why I chose to watch it on a plane. But hey, I did!

watching this shit while half awake on a dark plane felt like i was in another fucking dimension. what the hell happened

03/08 - Fortnite Chapter 5: Season 1

Hey Fortnite, I play that game! Sometimes.

I've been pretty consistently "playing" Fortnite since Chapter 2: Season 5, and I do really like the game. I love the gameplay, I love all the stupid crossovers, I loved the story, it was just a really fun time!

Well, up until like half way through Chapter 3 at least. The problem with Fortnite is that, no matter what, in the end of the day, it's still owned by Epic Games, and that means at some point, shits gonna get sloppy. I won't go over my whole history with how I feel Fortnites been on a decline since Chapter 3, but I can at least say i was pretty fucking checked out most of Chapter 4. I really didn't like it.

So, coming back on for Chapter 5? Oh shit this game is actually fun I forgot. Played a shit ton that season, actually finished the main battle pass for once, had so much fun with all the new things they added, it really feels like Fortnites back.

Oh... and there's that LEGO mode... and that rockband mode... and there's racing I guess... I didn't really touch them much but they're neat... They were pushing those modes pretty hard, I hope this isn't a sign of something to come... I'm sure they'll keep up the momentum for the next season right? Battle Royale is totally back, right?

i ended up staying up till like the last day grinding in creative to get this emote. im so glad i can make perfect cell do the bird is the word dance now.

03/12 - King of Crusher

I beat this game over on my twitch, you can catch me live playing obscure games every so often each month!! Check it out and give me money! I said mostly everything I wanted to say about it on stream, but this game was just a really fascinating little art project that was both really frustrating and really funny to play. I really wanna find more little gems like this to play, it's so ODD but fun.

03/15 - Animal Crossing (Movie)

Watched this movie as apart of a movie night with my groupchat and it was adorables so cutes! I don't think there's really anything I COULD say about this movie, but it does really make me wish Nintendo was more willing to make more stuff like it. Just a really well animated fun anime movie that's not trying to be this big thing.

the ending caught me completely off fucking guard though

03/17 - Unpacking

Similar to Animal Crossing, I don't really have a lot to say about this game besides so cutes! The story told through the environment was super adorable and I really do think back to this game a lot in a very emotional way.

That being said, I wish it was a tad longer for how expensive it was, as great as the art was lol

If you can find it on sale though, go play it!!

i was playing with my girlfriend and we ended up interpreting the main character as really hating her boyfriend. my fucking Pig of a husband wont let me put my posters on the wall. my Pigly husband. i need to Kill my Meat Pig of a Husband.

03/17 - Pizza Tower (The Noise Update)

In complete tonal contrast to Unpacking, I beat the Noise Update in Pizza Tower right after. It was, like Pizza Tower, really good, but not without its flaws.

In the time since I've played Pizza Tower, I've reflected a lot on what I love about the game and what I honestly don't care much for. I've been playing demos since the very first public one, and I've loved watching it evolve, but if there's one bit of context I've gotten that shapes how I look at the game, it's that the games creator has a really big issue with having a lot of ideas for stuff, and not really thinking about how they fit in together.

Pizza Tower is like, a REALLY good game, don't get me wrong. The movement is borderline perfect, the level design is consistently fun and flows well, the graphics are unmatched in how expressive they are, the music is some of my fave from the entire medium, but if there's one thing really holding back Pizza Tower it's that lack of focus, and I think you can boil that down to the core game design of levels.

Pizza Tower is easy to compare to Wario Land, given that's its primary inspiration, but I think it's much more akin to Sonic, which is also a major inspiration for it. The problem is, it definitely tries to apply Wario Lands brand of "wario can be anything" to sonics "levels can be anything". Sonic levels are all about super quick flashy levels you can blast through, each one having a gimmick unique to the level that you learn, master, and then use throughout the multiple zones. On the other end, Wario Land presents you with these large winding interior-like levels that you slowly (or somewhat quickly in the case of entries like WL4), navigate and solve puzzles throughout for treasure, with your main solution typically landing on how Wario himself can be controlled using various gimmicks unique to him. Your presented a gimmick, and then you remember that gimmick for the future so you can use it to solve a future puzzle. In many ways, these two games can almost feel like the opposite kind of game, only linked by being sidescrolling platformers where you can bust through walls. Pizza Tower, despite that, tries to be both, and in many ways succeeds, but cant avoid the problems that inherently comes with trying to be these two very polar ends.

Basically, I just feel theres a lot of really forgettable levels and an overall problem with gimmicks getting absolutely no chance to be explored so you can never really be rewarded in basic play for mastering a gimmick, other then replaying a level multiple times. I think less gimmicks but more places to use the same ones would be really great.

Talking about the Noise update specifically, it was just a fun retake on the main game, and made for a fun replay after not playing Pizza Tower for about a year since release. I find it really fascinating how even after changing how the entire game controls, the levels still work with minimal changes. I'm looking forward to see if they decide to change it any more in the future, and I hope whatever comes after Pizza Tower can be a much more focused experience.

03/17 - Hiveswap Act 1 (Replay)

See; Homestuck Reread. Been here a billion times, here to show my girl this time. I'll probably scream about this one later. <3

03/20 - Rescue Shot

See; King of Crusher. Another stream game! This one I liked even more, though I Really wish I had a lightgun (or could fix the mouse controls on my emulator). Incredibly adorable game with insanely good music, check out the VOD if your interested!

03/25 - Super Mario Bros. (1993)

I feel like in recent time, people have been hyping up this movie as like, secretly a really good film that people only hate because it's not a Mario movie. I'll be real, after watching it for the first time, I don't see it at all, I think this is just an incredibly funny bad movie.

Beyond not being Mario, which really doesn't matter at all, it kind of just felt like a fever dream of a script. Things kept HAPPENING there wasn't a single second to break I felt like I was in a nightmare hell dimension being blasted with insane plot beats and I couldn't keep track of anything. Without the Mario branding this would be like 10x LESS comprehensible, but good lord.

Maybe this is like, an arthouse film, and I need to watch it 12 more times and be high at least half those times, but idk I think it might actually be bad guys. Big Bertha a baddie though.

03/29 - The Croods

Another movie night with friends, we got the PRIVILEGE of watching The Croods. I saw it once when I was a kid, but I didn't really remember anything about it other then there was a character named Grug.

I now realize that the reason I remember this character is because this movie literally lied and he's the main character. It really tries to set up that the conventionally attractive main teenage girl is the protagonist but no this movie is 100% about Grug and it's so fucking Particular. Why pretend it's not about him when he becomes our sole point of view for half the film? Why pretend its about the teenage girl when she basically doesn't have any dialogue for the last 25% of the movie? What is this movie trying to say, politically? This movies a thinker. I think its a bigger thinker then 2001, honestly.

04/12 - Police Story

The first Jackie Chan movie I've ever seen and damn what a fucking good one to start with. Insanely entertaining, incredibly funny, and just a really great film! I don't think I have much else to say about it other then gush about each and every scene and how well made it is, but it really makes me wish we could get movies like this more. Just a practical effect wonderland where the main guy is just having fun with people on set. It's great.

hes kind of a babygirl

04/13 - Con Air

Actually the first time I've seen this movie, surprisingly, given my attachment to the media that has essentially co-opted this film. It wasn't good, like at all, but it was very very entertaining with friends. I didn't expect it to get so much into like, weird racism stuff?? Characters just keep appearing and getting named it's so fucking weird. What was the deal with Steve Buscemi's character, I feel like scenes were cut or something. Nick Cage was incredibly funny as the lead. It's the thing you watch with friends on 4/13, what else can I say.

why did he do this

04/19 - The Princess Bride

Honestly, I thought this one was a rewatch when we put it on in the GC, but I think I just remembered watching clips of it or seeing half of it on TV as a kid, so I'll just consider this a first time watch. It's really good! Just a fun simple movie full of extremely witty jokes. It's kind of like watching a Simpsons episode for the first time and getting to a part where they say something and you go "oh i've heard this quoted like a fucking million times, i get it now". If you haven't seen this movie, whattarya doin, go watch it!

i feel like were it not for andre being basically irreplaceable we would have a netflix reboot about these three right now. maybe that does exist already.

04/21 - PokeRogue

Half this thread is Pokemon and as I already said, I'm a roguelike freak. This game is like crack for me. That being said it's just alright. I think I'll be willing to judge it more once it's more finished and not just Pokemon in the most barebones form imaginable, coding wise. It's the basis for an extremely addicting game, and I plan on sinking even more hours into it soon. Extra points for using PMD music as well <3

im only just now finding out the rival is gendered. hey cunts let me play as a girl and get the girl rival or you hate me ok?

04/22 - The Mask (2023)

Now you may be wondering, The Mask? The movie from ten TRILLION years ago staring the homunculi known only as Jim Carrey? You'd be a fool to assume this. I am talking instead about Connor O' Malley's current best work, THAT The Mask.

There's not much I want to say about it, because I just think it's good, but if there's one thing I can say it's that Joker (2019) should be fucking embarrassed in how hard it was stood up by this short film.

Content warning for pretty heavy themes and a lot of crass jokes.

04/23 - Sonic the Hedgehog (2020) & Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022) (Rewatch)

In preparation for the Knuckles show (which I still haven't finished), I decided it'd be nice to rewatch these two films for the first time. I haven't seen the first one since I watched it for the first time before Sonic 2, and I haven't seen Sonic 2 since I saw it at an early screening. What do I think of them now in retrospect?

Yeah, not very good films. Very fun! But damn, yea wow, I think with enough time to look back on them, there's a lot I really don't care for in them, and I'm not just talking about the human scenes.

I've been having a lot of conversations about adaptations lately, so I'll mostly summarize my thoughts here. In making an adaptation, your one mission in my eyes is maintaining what made the original loved. Not good, because that's not really a quantifiable thing. Not faithfully, because I feel you can make a good adaptation without being faithful. All you need to truly keep is the Reason people came to that piece of media originally, in my eyes. Whether that means going as hard as you can with something like The Last of Us, which essentially 1 to 1 recreates an entire video game, or be much more out there like with One Piece (Netflix), which essentially tells the same story but with wildly different circumstance and aesthetic.

The Sonic movies, in my eyes, simply don't capture that. In the first movie alone, Sonic and Eggman are essentially our only ties to the games, which is fine as long as they can nail them right, right? And, as many before me have really pointed out, no they don't really at all. Sonic isn't really like Sonic at all, he's a much younger, innocent, and hyperactive "version" of the character, and I say version in quotations because I don't really feel like with those adjectives removed he'd be all that similar to Sonic still. This is basically a new character, and that's fine, but I'd be hard pressed to say it captures what brought people to Sonic. Similarly, Eggman is very much not really similar to any iteration to Eggman at all (except maybe AoSTH?) A lot of people love Jim Carrey Eggman, and I totally get why, but man he really has never clicked with me. I think I like canon Eggman too much to let go, it's over for me.

But I'm sure anyone who's been around Sonic long enough has heard a trillion complaints about the first movie. In rewatching the second movie, I found that it moved way faster then I remembered, and just had way less.. character? Tails is so incredibly shoehorned in, which is a common complaint, but it really felt like at times Sonic was too?

In Sonic games, Sonic isn't exactly a character we put ourselves in the shoes of. Sonic is like this cool older brother we're just along with for the ride. If anything we insert ourselves (as kids) in Tails' shoes. Sonic doesn't really have an internal monologue, nor does he really tend to need a big shonen arc to overcome in his games. He's very much this vessel to explore other characters, to see how people respond to his brash and cocky personality. In that way, Sonic works really well, but can struggle really hard when he's placed all alone. He needs people to not only bounce off of, but to do the emotional side of the story in his stead. With the Sonic movies, we get this very very diffrent form of Sonic being put into this scenarios the canon Sonic wouldn't typiclaly find himself in, and see how he acts. It can work for original stories, because it's basically an original character, but that's the struggle with Sonic 2, and I worry Sonic 3 as well. They aren't fully original stories. Sonic 2 is a loose adaptation of Sonic 3 in most ways, with Knuckles being the true second character, and Tails being mostly to the side. Knuckles acts basically perfectly, like yea that's Knuckles, no notes there outside of maybe not taking his heritage seriously enough, but that's him. So how do you write this movie sonic into this adaptation with a Knuckles whos playing it basically straight like the games? Well... I mean, you kind of just... You, don't, really? Sonic is really just There sometimes, to say quips and to move the story forward. With exception to the scene where he's having a feeling jam with Knux, which I like, Sonic is very much Just There, and it feels really odd. In the games, this works because of his aforementioned status as this guy your along with for the ride, a dude whos too cool to even be the protagonist, but Sonic Movie Sonic IS the protagonist. He's meek and still learning and is far from the asshole we know in the games and comics, but implanted into a games storyline, he just doesn't have much he can do. He can't be that too cool guy that let's his friends do the talking, because he's already been set up as this superhero esque main guy who needs to learn a lesson by the end of the film, or overcome some kind of arc. It's just all odd in retrospect, and I really wonder how they're gonna tackle it in Sonic 3, especially without all the characters that make Sonic Adventure 2s gears go.

i also couldnt stop staring at his teeth in the movie. i really dont like the teeth idk why im just now noticing them.

04/25 - Pseudoregalia

Knocked this game off my backlog and I'm really happy I did! Beat the game with all the time trials done and I really do love it. I want to call it the perfect length, but really I think it was just a bit too short and I hope we can get more content in the future, I'm definitely itching for more levels and maybe even more time trials.

I can't think of much else to say about the game. I don't think I picked up on the story much at all, I'll probably have to ask my girlfriend about it sometime, but it's not exactly a big part of the game. The music was absolutely fantastic, and I adore all of the costumes for the main character. I like her design, for many obvious reasons.

For further criticism besides length though, combat feels pretty useless. There's really no point in the game where I ever feel like I have to or even SHOULD fight, and the final boss ends up losing a lot of impact because of it. Enemies just become a hazard in navigating the world in a way that isn't particularly fun. Similarly, there were a few upgrades that had maybe one use ever and I don't even know why they're there. I think this game could benefit a lot from playing even harder into it's all too obvious inspirations and just getting a bunch of RPG mechanics and more RPG inspired elements in here. Give me Symphony of the Bunny-Cat-Goatgirl, full on.

I also watched madagascar 2 with friends, but i don't even feel like counting it. watch this fucked up compressed video instead.

THAT'S IT FOR Q1 2024!! I'm really trying to look at a lot this year, and I hope to have EVEN MORE TO TALK ABOUT in 4 months! maybe ill do it even earlier because damn this was a fucking lot to write. If you read this far thank you, I'll be sending you a giant mettalic muscular butler sir in the mail as thanks.

[dweemeister]

95th Academy Awards nominations reaction

I got up early this morning, typed some of these just after the nominations came out, and left it sitting in the drafts. Some personal reactions from me about today’s nominees:

Of the ten Best Picture nominees, I have seen five of them. This is the furthest ahead I’ve been at this point in awards season since 2019 (Avatar 2, Banshees, Elvis, EEAAO, Fabelmans). I do have my work cut out for me here. As of right now, I’m pretty much on the EEAAO train, but perhaps not as energetically as I’ve been for other movies in previous years. Partly due to the fact I can understand why people might dislike EEAAO intensely and partly because there are no 9/10 or 10/10 movies for me from 2022. At least from those I’ve seen. Fabelmans my second choice from those I’ve seen.

And now I have to watch two Top Gun movies. I’ve been avoiding the first for a long, long time having heard way too much about it and people saying it’s just not gonna be my thing. We’ll see over the next month.

Whoa. Where did Triangle of Sadness come from with both Picture and Director? That movie was divisive in some parts, and I’ve heard that it felt like an overlong lecture. The directors’ branch gonna directors’ branch, though - they always nominate one director out of left field. And this year, Ruben Östlund was that man.

Say it with me: in the Year of Our Lord, Anno Domini MMXXIII, we take Steven Spielberg and John Williams for granted. I think Spielberg has a shot at Director (and, as of this moment if I was a member of the Academy, I might just vote for him) and John gets his record-extending 53rd nomination (behind Walt Disney’s 59, and most by a living person). John’s count of five total Oscars (having last won 30 years ago) is too low. But the Academy members, I think, I have Oscar winners’ envy. John also becomes the oldest Academy Award nominee ever.

In any case, the other Original Score nominees this year are amelodic electronic background noise. Where is Simon Franglen for Avatar? Alexandre Desplat for Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio?

All Quiet overperformed here, compared to what I expected. I know its haul of 14 BAFTA nominations was ridiculous, but I chalked that up to WWI being more prominent than in the U.S. - where most people don’t think about it much at all. I’ve not seen it, but I must say I have a lot of admiration for the 1930 original that won Best Picture. That All Quiet was the first sound masterpiece at a time when the silent-to-sound transition was still going on. I’m not sure how this one will stack up, having heard about some of the narrative changes they made to it.

Despite what has been widely reported, Michelle Yeoh becomes the second Best Actress nominee of Asian descent since Merle Oberon for The Dark Angel (1935). Oberon had to hide her Indian and Maori heritage due to safety reasons and we didn’t learn about this until after her death.

Also overjoyed to see Nighy, Michelle Williams, Ke Huy Quan, Hong Chau, and Stephanie Hsu all in the mix for acting. Best Actor features five first-time nominees for the first time in 88 years. Also, that’s four actors of Asian descent getting nominations! That’s a record!

Cartoon Saloon finally has the first blemish on their Academy Award nominations record. They were previously nominated for all of their movies - The Secret of Kells (2009), Song of the Sea (2014), The Breadwinner (2017), and Wolfwalkers (2020; which should have beaten Soul). My Father’s Dragon (2022) definitely was their weakest movie yet and, yeah, that didn’t deserve to be here. Hoping to see a return to form for the Kilkenny-based studio. You’ve got to think GdT’s Pinocchio now. No contest. I need to check out The Sea Beast, though.

What happened to RRR? Original Song only? Not a movie I’ve seen because I insist on watching it in the original Telugu, but my sense was that there was a divide in how it was received. In the West, with critics and audiences having very little idea about the nature of Indian cinema and its history, it was something different and refreshing and was well-received. In India, its use of Hindu iconography struck a chord of Modi-esque Hindu nationalism that has muted critical plaudits there. It’s an interesting dynamic, one that I doubt Westerners picked up at all.

I am so excited to see the short films, as always (and I write up on them too, you can see last year’s edition for Animated Short here). Those last two Animated Short nominees though? My Year of Dicks (not people named Richard, afaik) and An Ostrich Told Me the World Is Fake and I Think I Believe It? What titles. Can’t wait! As I understand it, no major American studios were in play for Animated Short at the shortlist stage. So this should be a fun, independent filmmaker-driven slate.

The Batman should have found its way into cinematography.

Never count Diane Warren out for Original Song, no matter how obscure the movie! She’ll, of course, lose - as she unfortunately always does. 14 nominations for Warren. Glad she picked up the Honorary Oscar last year, though.

Lots of clamor about the decision to leave Decision to Leave out in International Feature. But the International Feature branch usually does very funny things, and I don’t think there has been a consensus at all in this category. All Quiet the odds-on favorite due to its significant haul of nominations, however.

Well, this should be a fun month! On this blog, “31 Days of Oscar” - my marathon based on Turner Classic Movies’ (TCM) marathon of the same name featuring only Oscar nominees and Honorary Oscar winners through the 95 years of Oscar history - is coming on March 1st!

[geekgemsspooksandtoons]

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

A heads up, I worry this review isn’t really a review. I talk about some things and I just want to get this done with. But I hope you guys don’t mind what I wrote.

Here’s my “Review” of this film.

I like animation, particularly cartoons, and I guess you can say I’m a cartoon fan. I don’t watch everything. But I can also say I’m one of the many people who agrees animation is a “Medium” and not a “Genre” like some folks say. Guess you can say I’m one of the folks who agree that “Animation is cinema” but I do agree that in America. Animation is sometimes held back by well, I guess you can say viewpoints that some people still think animation is for children. And a large majority of animated features are still made with families in mind instead of more mature audiences. It’s weird to explain, but I think you may get what I mean.

While I for one at times really don’t give a shit. Because while I agree with that animation should be respected more. I also do agree we need more animated projects that are more “Mature” that showcase what the medium can do. Where it can do more much more than live action. Such as with recent films like Guillermo Del Toro’s Pinocchio being something that older audiences can enjoy it just like younger audiences can. And while I love those more “Mature” properties and whatever else...I just wanna say I can get bothered by some folks on Twitter. I’m rambling on, you guys shouldn’t trust my opinion.

I don’t like to consider myself a “Cinemaphile” for certain reasons. I’m a man who is a big fan of shows like Hilda, Infinity Train, The Owl House and Moon Girl & Devil Dinosaur. And to this day, I still act like a show like Infinity Train along with Hilda are shows that LEGIT need to be seen no matter what age you are. While I think for Infinity Train, I warn you about certain aspects of it. These are shows that I feel like more people should check out for certain reasons. Because shows like Hilda and Infinity Train, I guess you can say have changed my life in some ways. Let’s not forget the importance of shows like The Owl House and Steven Universe. But let’s get back to the point.

Nearly five years ago, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse was released into theaters and was a critical success and box office success. And now, we have a sequel to it. This is going to be a spoiler free review of the film. But I worry if my review will do it justice. I will add a keep reading option because it will get long.

I’ll be honest, Into the Spider-Verse legit surprised me when I first saw it in theaters. I was basically like, “Are you telling the guys behind Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs and The Lego Movie were responsible for this?!” and while I had little nitpicks. Everything about the film was incredible. And it’s surprising I have only watched the film once, when it was in theaters. But I still remember it. It was a game changer for animation with some of the directions it took. But not just for animation, but CBM’s and just an overall damn good movie.

Let me reveal this. When it was releasing...I sadly had seen some major spoilers. Not everything or...I saw some things and heard/read some things I think if I hadn’t heard before. I think my experience with the film would’ve been so much better. But what’s amazing about Across the Spider-Verse...

It still legitimately surprised me.

It’s my fault in some ways for being spoiled. But still...I wished this film was still in an IMAX theater because a film like this needs to be experienced on a big screen due to not just the visuals. Mainly because of the overall experience. Like...this film is beautiful.

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse is likely one of the greatest films ever made that I’ve seen. That’s maybe my feelings right now. They may change, but that is how I feel about this film with what I said on my first reaction. https://twitter.com/Geekgem1/status/1670189231866806272?s=20

The reason I say this is because as someone who’s been a Spider-Man for nearly my entire life if I recall right. And someone who likes animated films, and films in general. Across the Spider-Verse is not only a visual treat that pushes the boundaries of what it’s doing. It’s a very human film with moments that flourish with the time they are given. And while the film can be quite humorous. It can be mature when it needs to be. 

Despite being a multiversal story, again, it’s very human. Particularly with its main leads such as Miles and Gwen. Everyone gives a fantastic performance. But I think some stand outs are Shameik Moore, Hailee Steinfeld & Oscar Isaac. Yet again, everyone does their job well. Everyone is casted brilliantly.

Also, Hobie Brown is the fucking goat. I just wanted to say that.

The visuals are used to not just tell a story, but also feelings and moods. There’s a lot to speak about with this film. Each world is presented with a different art style that fits that world. Again, this film is beautiful. The detail is remarkable.

The score and themes for the different characters are fantastic. And they fit so well for the scenes that are playing. Along with powerful moments which a score should do. It hits the right notes.

But honestly, I think what really got me was the themes that interconnected with the story of the characters. The themes of free will and predetermined destiny and the well...”Canon” thing like...even before seeing this film. It really made me wonder about that. It really pushes the stakes concerning these characters, especially towards the end. It’s strangely meta but not fully.

The set pieces and action scenes are incredible. And again, I would’ve loved to see this on an IMAX screen because my lord. They are sights to see.

I really don’t know what else to say, because I don’t know why I can’t write this properly. Because I hardly have any negative to say. I’m kind of stalling on making this. But overall, I’m sorry for the shitty review. There are better reviews about this film. This was a fantastic film and I’m excited for Beyond the Spider-Verse.

It’s films like the Spider-Verse films, along with others that I feel like are push the boundary for an animated film with its animation. Along with showcasing what you can do with the medium. It’s something that needs to be seen. And it’s one of the best Spider-Man films ever made. I think it’s better than the first Spider-Verse film.

Overall, great film. We need more films like these Spider-Verse films. While maybe not everyone needs to be a game changer. But again, pushing this boundary with animation...I feel tired writing this.

[aliciaphen]

☆ ALICIA’S MONTHLY MEDIA MENTIONS: DECEMBER `22

Hi. I've consumed more media this month than I have this entire year. Happy New Year everyone - I hope we all make the best of what's to come.

Visual:

Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio (2022) dir. Guillermo del Toro, Mark Gustafson: I was really excited to watch this after seeing the trailer but I wasn't expecting it to be a musical. I loved that they used a biblically accurate angel for the Blue Angel rather than the traditional look. I can't believe it took like 15 years to make it.

Split (2016) dir. M. Night Shyamalan: I rewatched this because I needed Anya Taylor Joy content and I couldn't get through the first episode of The Queen's Gambit. It's still a pretty great movie, but I hate that cheesy ending line lol.

Anastasia (1997) dir. Don Bluth, Gary Goldman: I grew up watching this movie throughout my childhood, so I already have a huge bias toward it. It's so great. The characters and their dynamic is so likable and the songs are so GOOD.

The Mummy (1999) dir. Stephen Sommers: Another film I grew up watching. It's a lot more problematic than I remember T_T. Also cheesy but it was the 90s so you could kind of get away with it.

Emily, The Criminal (2022) dir. John Patton Ford: I was surprised by how much I liked this one. It's fast-paced, which is good for my pea brain. They make the character Emily easy to empathize with. Especially now when it's hard to afford to live, vulnerable people are targeted for these "get rich, quick" scams. I remember seeing so many of those ads whenever I went on YouTube for quite some time. Idk, I liked this one.

Bo Burnham: Inside (2021) dir. Bo Burnham: I always heard people talking about how great Bo Burnham was. I remember seeing his vines, but I never got into watching his stuff. I feel like the humour doesn't quite suit my taste, but I appreciate his work ethic and his capacity for making such a high-quality musical comedy. He's pretty fucking awesome.

Dreams (1990) dir. Akira Kurosawa: In a quest to research the Japanese folklore of fox weddings during sun showers, I watched this movie. It's just so pretty. I love the last story, where it's the small village and the funeral is more of a celebration. Just a gorgeous film.

Incantation (2022) dir. Kevin Ko: Heard from my roommate that this film was really scary. And I can confirm that it was. I watched half of it from between my fingers. Story wise, though, it was quite interesting. It’d be a fun watch for a group.

Atonement (2007) dir. Joe Wright: Another gorgeous film. I’ve always seen screen caps of it and have even watched Mina Le’s breakdown of the costuming from the film. I think the visuals are stronger than the story. Emotion wise, it feels like a less hard-hitting titanic.

Extreme Job (2019) dir Lee Byeong-heon: I watched this with my roommate! It’s a fun, chill watch. Just overall a good time.

The Volcano: Rescue From Whakaari (2022) dir. Rory Kennedy: Some time earlier this year I remember seeing volcanic scarring that looked like the most intense, painful thing someone could ever experience. And I read up about the victim and they were hurt during the volcanic eruption in New Zealand a few years ago. The documentary is quite tragic, and interesting if anybody is up to watch it.

Klaus (2019) dir. Sergio Pablos: Such a cute movie. The scene where the mailman is giving paper and pencils and stamps out like it’s a drug deal actually made me audibly laugh. I’m surprised its 2D animation. It’s a really great Christmas movie for the whole family.

Brave (2012) dir. Brenda Chapman, Mark Andrews: AH. I still love this movie after so many years. I first watched it when I was in grade 5 as an “end of year” trip. It’s so good, story wise. As a young adult, I feel like I can’t relate to it as much - to my surprise. I think my older sister could probably relate to it more. I have a good relationship with my mom, which I’m super grateful for. I want to make a film about ME. Lmfao.

The Wonder (2022) dir. Sebastian Lelio: I wasn’t as interested in this film. It’s rather a frustrating watch to be honest. If you want visuals of Ireland and Florence Pugh, I’d give this one a go.

Marriage Story (2019) dir. Noah Baumbach: Ever since watching this film I’ve been seeing Adam Driver everywhere, it seems. I didn’t expect to feel for this movie as much as I did. I think the pacing was done very well. The letter reading at the end is what got me. :’(

Alice in Borderland, Season 2 (2022): Season 2 was better than season 1. Because this world and its rules are already established, I think the show got to focus more on the characters and their relationships. The action sequences were quite fun and I am SO surprised that they didn’t end it in a shitty way. I’m happy the characters got their happy ending but that there’s still room for exploration into this world. The last challenge, though was a little TOO LONG. DAMN.

Avatar: The Way of Water (2022) dir. James Cameron: Okay so I wasn’t excited or looking forward to this sequel at all. I was quite indifferent toward it and wasn’t planning on watching it in theatres. But I ended up watching it with my family and it’s literally my new hyperfixation. I’m actually listening to the original motion picture soundtrack as I’m writing - and that’s not a joke. I’ve heard people say that the story is simple, and I suppose I can agree - its basically the family having to escape from the war and a revenge plot from the enemy side. And I’ve seen people wonder why its 3 hours long. And, it definitely felt like the film would never fucking end but, then again… did I really want it to…? In that time, I felt like I could actually get attached to the characters and this new family. I often really like media that makes me go through a lot of emotions and this was one of them. I need Avatar 3, 4, 5, & 6 and whatever else James Cameron is planning. I need to go visit Pandora in Disney World, even. Zoe Saldana, I love you.

Avatar (2009) dir. James Cameron: I ended up rewatching Avatar right after coming back from watching The Way of Water. I first watched this when I was 8 years old. I never really got to appreciate the absolutely insane world building that was put into this film, but now, as a student that wants to try pursuing film and maybe (?) visdev, I’m just astounded by the creatures and the religion and the plant life of the Na’vi people and how it’s been expanded on in Avatar 2. Again, a simple story, but I felt all the emotions so I love it.

Logan (2017) dir. James Mangold: Probably one of the best superhero movies I’ve seen. It still holds up today. Another emotional ride, so I’m inclined to say it’s a favourite. It’s almost… quiet. Like - it doesn’t do too much. All the marvel movies these days are doing too much. It’s kind of embarrassing. Can you tell I’m getting a little tired of writing about all the things I’ve watched? And I’m only on visual media. Anyways - this, the original Spider-Man movies, the last Spider-Man movie from MCU, and the Spiderverse movies and maybe Winter Soldier are the only superhero movies I have the patience to watch anymore.

Knives Out (2019) dir. Rian Johnson: It was so fun! Something I don’t have to pay that much attention to because I know I’ll likely never be able to solve it. I know they spent most of the budget of this film on the cast because everyone in there is fucking crazy.

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery (2022) dir. Rian Johnson: I think the first one is better.

Lead Me Home (2021) dir. Pedro Kos, Jon Shenk: It’s only about 40 minutes, so it’s a quick documentary. It’s eye opening. Makes me feel bad because I’m one of those people that don’t look homeless people in the eye when I walk past them. But I don’t think that’s the point of the doc. There’s obviously something very wrong with the housing system and to see that anybody could end up in such an unfortunate situation is scary. It’s especially sad seeing the people who have family that could help them, but I also understand their point of not wanting to be a burden on their friends or family.

Music: December 2022 Spotify Playlist

Selfish - YooA: I saw people making fun of this song but I’m actually addicted to it. YooA in that one stage where she’s wearing that fringe shirt and pink pants with her hair in a bun looks so good.

Blood Moon - YooA: I feel like I’m in a mystery movie?? Like I’m a detective trying to solve a mystery.

In My Dreams - Christy Altomare: One of the best things to come out of the Anastasia Broadway production.

Ditto - NewJeans: The girls have done it again. This time, enjoy three minutes of teenage loneliness.

Nothing Is Lost (You Give Me Strength) - The Weeknd: I wasn’t joking when I said I’m listening to the Avatar: The Way of Water soundtrack.

Into the Water - Simon Franglen: SO BEAUTIFUL. If you’re going to listen to any song from the soundtrack listen to this one.

Avatar: The Way of Water (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack - Simon Franglen, The Weeknd: Linking the album for good measure.

Books:

Steal Like An Artist by Austin Kleon: I’ve finished reading this book and it has inclined me to be better at consistently drawing in my sketchbook and journal.

Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynn’s Jones: I plan on finishing this book this month. I’ll update you at the end of January.

[themovieblogonline]

SMILE Review: You'll need therapy after this!

  Smile centers around a therapist named Dr. Rose Cotter (Sosie Bacon) who, after meeting with one of her many ill patients, experiences a traumatic and violent occurrence in one session with a Ph.D. student (Caitlin Statsey) who claims to see "something" - not a person - smiling at her in an evil way. The story gradually goes deeper into the psyche of both the patients and doctors in this twisted tale. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcDK7lkzzsU THE BAD *HEAR ME OUT*   So I went into this knowing very little about the film as I sometimes appreciate discovering plots as I watch. I have to admit that once I realized that this was yet another movie about mentally ill patients, it immediately made me roll my eyes. First of all, most of these movies try to scare us with these multiple personality disorders and paranoid patients who see things. It would make anyone want to feel disturbed and uneasy, I get it - but it's so overdone and I'm over the stigma quite frankly. Luckily, this movie played the mental illness card well so to speak. The audience I was with also reacted to one scene with appropriate disgust when  Dr. Rose's fiancé Trevor (played by the very fine,  Jessie T. Usher) called out Rose's mentally ill genes with contempt. That was a heartwarming moment to know folx were on the same page as I was. It was then that I realized the viewers like the protagonist and then it starts getting better, and creepier. As Rose does more research she learns that this thing that has been spooking her was brought on by her traumatic session with the Ph.D. student. It seems this thing thrives on fear, and trauma and gets bigger and scarier the more it senses fear. Not only that, it gets stronger as people take their own lives and particularly when there is a witness. At one point the creature reminded me of a classic del Toro fantasy. The direction and writing by Parker Finn were fantastic. There were several chair jumping scenes and hands-over-eyes moments for me and others. Namely Rose's nephew's birthday party... now those poor kids are gonna need lots of therapy!  THE GOOD One of my favorite scenes was when Rose's psychiatrist, Dr. Northcott (Robin Weigert) pays her a visit only for Rose to realize this isn't who she thinks it is. And then it happens, the creepiest evil smile you've ever seen. No thanks! Not today Satan - amirite? This 'thing' seems to get passed through each person who eventually kills themselves, passing it on and on.  It was a nice surprise for me (since I'm not smart like you reading this now) to know that Kal Penn is in this and plays Rose's boss, Dr. Desai. A few folx in the audience didn't seem to know either and reacted to seeing him on screen. The script was really well written, even to the point where the audience empathized with Rose's ex-boyfriend, Joel (Kyle Gallner)  who is a cop! Poor bloke seemed to really care about Rose and went to great lengths to help her figure out what is plaguing her mind.   No one is safe in Smile - animals or people. This movie does what horror movies should do - scare the smile off of your face. Go see it before Smile 2 comes out! IN THEATRES AND DOLBY CINEMA EVERYWHERE FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 30 Read the full article

[fill-me-with-your-memes-daddy]

Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]

So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.

Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad

Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.

STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.

IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.

STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.

Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him

So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.

NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT

The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable

Those husky animation models suck lmao

Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!

God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it

Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that

But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????

Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden

This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh

Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)

THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much

Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)

Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens

On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending

Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other

YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).

Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last

Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!

Oh never mind slavery trollmarket

Bruh titanic camelot

I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things

NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH

STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER

THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN

WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?

Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person

For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues

Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy

Bruh I was grieving

PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference

Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?

NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS

Oh thank God he's okay

NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD

oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))

But I want to see him again

But I'm glad to see vex

Yay they're in arcadia!

But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((

Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)

Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them

Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus

DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE

Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.

BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.

Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.

Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???

And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole

And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!

THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!

BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????

Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭

Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora

HUZZAH

NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????

STAB THAT BITCH JIM

WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED

Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it

SEVEN KIDS?????????

T O B Y ????????????

W A I T NO

N O

IS HE ACTUALLY

OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE

NO THERE ISN'T

F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED

Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS

I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH

W A I T

HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????

HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????

WAIT IS HE

BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON

HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????

BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending

TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all

And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.

[letterboxd]

Work Horse.

Taking on a rare leading role in his decades-spanning career, national treasure Tim Blake Nelson speaks with Mitchell Beaupre about demystifying heroes, reinventing genres and something called a quiche Western.

“This film is unapologetic about all the tropes that it’s deploying in service of telling the story... You’ve got a satchel full of cash. You’ve got gunslinging, physical violence, and feeding somebody to the pigs.” —Tim Blake Nelson

Described by Letterboxd members as “a national treasure” who “makes everything better”, Tim Blake Nelson is a journeyman actor who has tapped into practically every side of the industry since making his feature debut in Nora Ephron’s This Is My Life back in 1992. Whether you are a Marvel fanatic, a history buff or a parent trying to get through the day, the actor’s distinctive presence is a charming sight that’s always welcome on the screen.

Tim Blake Nelson is one of those rare actors who unites all filmgoers, a man genuinely impossible not to love, which certainly seems to be the case for Hollywood. Checking off working relationships with directors ranging from Terrence Malick and Ang Lee to Hal Hartley and Guillermo Del Toro, Nelson has covered the boards, even crossing over into directing and writing, both in films and on the stage.

Yet, despite being a renowned talent who can take a smaller supporting role in a massive Steven Spielberg blockbuster starring Tom Cruise and carry the film, Nelson-as-leading-man sightings have been few and far between. In fact, it’s quite a struggle to find a film with Nelson in a leading role, as even playing the titular role for directors who understand his greatness still results in him only appearing in the opening section of an anthology feature.

At last, the leading role Nelson fans were in need of has arrived in the form of Old Henry, a new Western from writer/director Potsy Ponciroli. Nelson plays the eponymous Henry, a widowed farmer with a mysterious past who makes a meager living with his son (Gavin Lewis), doing his best to leave his old life behind and hide away from the world. Things get complicated when Henry stumbles upon a satchel of cash and a wounded stranger (Scott Haze), bringing them both into his home. Soon, a dangerous posse led by an intimidating Stephen Dorff comes calling, setting the stage for an old-fashioned throwdown in this twisty Western siege thriller.

Premiering at the Venice Film Festival, Old Henry has been warmly received on Letterboxd. “Old Henry feels like the culmination of Tim Blake Nelson’s twenty-plus-year career, but from another dimension, where he’s highly regarded as a leading man”, writes Noah, speaking not only to the strength of Nelson’s performance, but also to the fact that this leading role shouldn’t be such a rarity. Todd awards Nelson the prize for “Best Facial Hair in a 2021 film”, before applauding the actor for pouring “every emotion in his body to play Henry”.

Letterboxd’s East Coast editor Mitchell Beaupre saddled up for a chat with Nelson about the intentional hokiness of the Westerns that made him fall in love with filmmaking, how the Coen brothers put other directors on notice, and the fatherly joy of keeping it all in the family.

I’ve seen a lot of interviews with you discussing your career as an actor, a writer, and a director. You always speak with such reverence for the art. Where does that passion come from for you? What made you want to pursue this field? Tim Blake Nelson: It’s funny, doing these interviews for Old Henry has been reminding me of my introduction to filmmaking as an art. I’ve realized that I had never quite located it, but it really started with the Sergio Leone Westerns, which I would see on television when I was growing up in Oklahoma in the ’70s. Before that, going to the cinema was always invariably a treat, no matter what the film, but I would just be following the story and the dialogue.

The Sergio Leone movies were the first ones that exposed subjectivity in telling stories on film to me. That was where I became aware of the difference between a closeup and an extreme closeup, or how you could build tension through a combination of the angle on a character with the editorial rhythm, with the lens size, with the music in addition to the dialogue and the story.

How old were you when this shift in your understanding of cinema was happening? I think it was across the ages of ten and eighteen, where I suddenly realized that this was an auteur here, Leone. There was a guy behind all these movies I was seeing—and in Oklahoma, you could see a Sergio Leone movie every weekend. This was a man making deliberate and intelligent decisions in everything that I was seeing.

I started noticing that a character was in a duster that goes all the way down to his boots, even though that’s not necessarily accurate to the Old West. That’s something else. Also, why is he wearing it in the desert? Would that have been very practical? And look at that cigar Clint Eastwood is smoking. It’s not smooth, it looks like it was a piece of tree root. Then later I learned it’s a particular kind of Italian cigar, but somehow it was defining this genre of Western. I marveled at that, and found it unbelievably thrilling to discover. I loved the stories and the dialogue and the intentional hokiness of it all. All of it was conspiring to teach me to venerate this form.

Sergio Leone, his daughters, and Clint Eastwood on the set of ‘The Good, the Bad and the Ugly’ (1966).

The connection there is interesting between the Leone Westerns to where Old Henry is at now. You’ve talked before about how the Western genre is one that is reinvented over and over throughout the years— Oh, you do your homework!

I try my best! What would you say defines the current era of Westerns that we’re seeing, and how the genre is being reinvented? Well, Joel and Ethan [Coen] did a lot of mischief, in a good way, with The Ballad of Buster Scruggs. Genres are always about genres, in addition to their story. So, I would say that Buster Scruggs is the quintessential postmodern Western, if you look at it as one movie instead of as an anthology, because it celebrates the history of the form. The magic of that movie is that it engages you in each story while also being a meditation on death. That’s what connects each one of those tales, and then it’s also a meditation on storytelling to boot. In the final chapter, you have a character talking about why we love stories, and he’s telling it to a bunch of people who you’ll learn are all dead.

The stories are a way of delaying the inevitable mortality. I mean, look at that. It’s such an accomplishment. With that movie, I think Joel and Ethan put filmmakers on notice that Westerns had better always be also about Westerns, because whether you like it or not, they are. I think they probably came to understand that when they were making True Grit, although knowing the two of them they probably understood it already.

Do you feel there’s a direct correlation between a movie like Buster Scruggs and Old Henry, in this era of postmodern, revisionist Westerns? How it impacts a movie like Old Henry is that you have Potsy embracing the Western-ness of the movie. This film is unapologetic about all the tropes that it’s deploying in service of telling the story. You’ve got the cantankerous old man hiding a past, who’s a maverick who wants to keep the law and the bad guys off his property. He wants to be left alone. You’ve got a satchel full of cash. You’ve got gunslinging, physical violence, and feeding somebody to the pigs. Yet, it’s all accomplished without irony in a very straightforward way that is utterly confident, and in love with the genre.

I think ultimately that’s why the movie works, because it’s very front-footed. It’s not hiding from you. It’s not deceiving you and trying to tell you it’s something that it isn’t. It’s a good, straightforward Western.

Tim Blake Nelson as the titular singer in ‘The Ballad of Buster Scruggs’ (2018).

That’s a bit different from those Leone Westerns, with all of their anachronisms. I remember when the movie Silverado came out when I was growing up, and people were calling it a “quiche Western”, which was funny. That was what they would call it in Oklahoma because it had a bunch of movie stars in it, who weren’t known for being in Westerns. It was the Sergio Leone crowd calling it that. I went and saw it, wondering, “Well, if it’s a quiche Western, then why is everybody talking about it?” I saw it, and I loved it. Those folks putting it down like that were wrong. It’s actually a straightforward, hard-boiled, hardcore unapologetic Western. You don’t like some of the movie stars in it, but get over it. The reason that movie works is because it’s straight-ahead and well-told, and I think that movie holds up.

Old Henry is the same kind of animal. It’s more in the tradition of Sergio Leone—or, actually, I would say more in the tradition of Unforgiven. That was a big influence on Potsy.

Unforgiven was marvelous in the way it demystified that old black hat/white hat mentality of Westerns, opening up a more multi-dimensional understanding. You’re no stranger to that. A series like Watchmen takes that approach with superheroes, who in a sense hold the position now that Western heroes used to hold culturally. Do you find there’s more of a demand these days to challenge those archetypes who used to be put on pedestals—be they superheroes, cowboys, police—and provide a deeper analysis? Absolutely, yes. At the same time, I think the demystified Western hero goes back to John Wayne in The Searchers. I think it really started with that character, one of the greatest characters ever in a Western. There’s One-Eyed Jacks, with Marlon Brando, which was made just after The Searchers, and again embracing this concept of an extremely complicated man. I don’t think you get the Sergio Leone movies without that.

I always think of McCabe & Mrs. Miller as a Western that was doing something totally different than anything I had seen before. That’s another one, with that final image with the character smoking opium, going into oblivion after the demise of Warren Beatty’s very flawed character, after you’ve watched what it has taken to really build that town. You have a director, Robert Altman, making the deliberate choice to shoot in order so that they can build the town while they’re shooting the movie, and you really get the cost of it. I think there’s a lot of history to get to a place where a movie like Unforgiven can happen. Then Clint comes along and, as he often does, moves it forward even more.

Gavin Lewis as Henry’s son Wyatt in ‘Old Henry’.

That’s a film that tackles legacy, as does Old Henry, which at its core is ultimately about the relationship between a father and his son. You got to work on this film with your own son, coincidentally named Henry, who was part of the art department. What is that experience like, getting to share your passion with your son on a project together? Well, I think something that is true for the character of Henry and for myself, and perhaps all of us, is that we all want our kids to have better lives than ours. I want that to be true in every respect. Mostly, I want them to be more fulfilled than I have been. My kids look at me when I say that and say, “Thanks a lot Dad for raising that bar”, because they see that I have a pretty good life. Which I do, but I still think they can be more fulfilled than I am, and I want that for them. One of the great privileges of this movie was to watch my son—who was the on-set decorator—work his ass off.

Those are the words of an incredibly proud father. He’s a work horse, and he’s learning about filmmaking, and I think on his current trajectory he will go beyond where I’ve gone as a filmmaker, directing more movies than I’ve been able to direct. Do a better job at it, too. He’s also a singer-songwriter, and I think he can have a venerable career doing that if he wants, but he wants to make movies too, and I hope that’s going to happen for him. It was a thrill to watch him do the work, the twelve- and fourteen-hour days, and after every take resetting and making sure everything was right. It felt like an accomplishment to see him take on that responsibility and do the real work every day.

Related content

SJ Holiday’s lists of Essential Neo-Westerns and Essential Modern Westerns

The Best Neo-Westerns of the 21st Century, according to JS Lewis

Our interview with Slow West director John Maclean

Follow Mitchell on Letterboxd

‘Old Henry’ is in US theaters now and on VOD from Friday, October 8.

[daincrediblegg]

2, 4, 28, 30, and 33 for the film questions!

2.Favorite director(s)?

Oh god there are so many to list and I know I’m going to forget so many but here we go- I’m also gonna include some showrunner directors in here bc honestly there are way more talented female directors making shows than there are those who make feature films and I need to give them credit for how much they inspire me too. Some of these may be painfully obvious and others not so much but here we go:

Guillermo Del Toro, Mike Flannagan, Peter Jackson, Hiyao Miyazaki, Akira Kurosawa, Orson Welles, Lily and Lana Watchowski, Todd Phillips, Wes Anderson, Robert Eggers, Bong Joon-Ho, Mel Brooks, Taika Watiti, The Coen Brothers, Jon Favreau, Terry Gilliam, Makoto Shinkai, Jim Henson, John Hughes, Chris AND Jonathan Nolan, Lisa Joy, Amy Sherman-Palladino, Noah Baumbach, Sergio Leone, Jordan Peele, Ari Aster, Jonathan E. Steinburg, Sam Mendez, Kenneth Branagh, Vince Gilligan, Spike Jonze, Spike Lee, Rian Johnson, Tarsem Singh, Billy Wilder, Alfred Hitchcock, Francis Ford Coppola and begrudgingly Quentin Tarantino (bc even tho he is way overrated in the film bro community he does make some fun movies it has to be said)

4.What’s a movie you watched over and over again as a child that you still love?

Another that I remember watching a LOT is legally blonde. When I started sleeping by myself at night my parents let me keep a tiny DVD player in my room and I used to watch movies on it to go to sleep (also bc I was afraid of the dark for a long ass time) and I distinctly remember Legally Blonde was the first one that I put on every night to sleep to lmao.

28.Recommend three completely different movies.

Aight. First if you haven’t seen Top Gun Maverick you should bc it’s all practical and that’s fucking insane to do and nobody else has made a flight movie like this ever. The original looks like fucking tinker toys in comparison I mean like literally but it walked so this film could fucking SOAR so… yeah. There u go.

Next is a deep cut: Bicycle Thieves. Italian Neo-Realism at its finest (which basically means none of the “actors” in it were career actors- just normal people, and no extras either- nothing is staged it’s all 100% just footage from the real world, and also probably the best child actor I’ve ever seen playing the kid in this ever. Also this was Sergio Leone before all the spaghetti westerns and frankly I think this might be my fave film of his to trump them all).

Another deep cut but since we’re thinking about star wars and obi wan kenobi I can’t help but mention The Hidden Fortress by Akira Kurosawa. If you want to know where Star Wars comes from? Thats it. In its entirety. And Toshiro Mifune essentially plays the original Obi Wan Kenobi (and god what a perfect world that could’ve been if he had but this is a great window into that- also I think he’s a better sword fighter than Alec Guinness for sure). I might have to even re-watch again for further parallels to the Kenobi series man.

30.Favorite movie with a pet/animal as an important aspect?

I mean god where do I start. First that comes to mind is Babe bc I watched that so much as a kid it’s burned into my head now. Then I thought Okja because jesus that fucker got dark (but god damn important as a film for sure)… but fuck all that we’re gonna go with Balto because that was my fave as a kid I even had a wolf stuffie I named Balto after him so there u go.

33.Name a film you could write an entire 10+ page essay on. (If you’ve done it, what was the focus?)

Well I mean I have written many 10 page papers on many films lmao. My first was on LOTR and it was focused on Merry and Pippin but in hindsight it wasn’t the most well thought out theme or execution (but then again whose first college paper is?) but WITH that hindsight it’s really a think piece about the vitality of side characters to the movement of plot- using both the book and the films as examples to how Merry and Pippin shape the story of LOTR way more than they’re given credit for. Yes I have always been a slut for them.

Another one I wrote more recently was a comparison of horror director methodology to edgar allan poe’s essays on writing structure in which I of course used GDT and crimson peak as my prime example- given time I would’ve delved more into mike flannagan and robert eggers films and shows too as examples of the grander cinematic gothic revival, but alas, that’s a whole ass thesis and it was only a 7 page assignment and I didn’t have that kind of time. Also I did a critical analysis about the ending of Apt Pupil once that correlated the nazi imagery to the american male teenager that earned me a handshake from my professor and an A for the course but like y’know no big deal. And of course y’all know how bad down I am about midnight mass I mean Y’all have seen the meta posts that are somehow still circulating. I have so much about that series living in my head and never enough time to put it to paper lmao. In fact thats true of a lot of things I literally have so many essays in my head happening all at once and I am always looking for some kind of excuse to write it but never getting one lmao

FILM QUESTIONS

[marzipanandminutiae]

For the character ask meme, obviously I have to ask Lucille (or Edith!)

Oh no I have suddenly developed an ocular affliction that causes me to read the word "or" as "and"

What a strange and unfortunate-

Edith Cushing

First impression: My first impressions of this movie are kind of hazy in my memory now, because it's been six years but also because all I really recall is how much I loved it. Like, you know those movies where you leave the theatre and you just feel Changed(TM)? CPeak was definitely one of those, even if my Fandom Spiral for it was delayed.

I do remember thinking, "oh thank god, a Victorian female lead who's strong and independent and compelling without giving the impression that the director secretly hates 19th-century women." That definitely hasn't changed.

Impression now: MY STONE-COLD BADASS BUTTERFLY GODDESS. I love Edith so much. I want to write her more, and I have some stories coming up which will give me that opportunity. She's imaginative but no-nonsense, a keen appreciator of beauty but eminently practical. Edith is the eternal "sir, this is a Wendy's," and the epitome of "do no harm, but take no shit." Also her wardrobe is excellent.

Favorite moment: Any time she's talking about her book. It's so relatable and she's so determined to make her dream come true. Characters do talk to you, and I wonder, if she ever found an earlier copy of the text she'd stashed away somewhere, what Cavendish would make of himself now.

Idea for a story: Edith is secretly gay and marries Thomas just to get to Lucille. That's it; that's my next multi-chapter fanfic. Coming eventually to an AO3 near you!

Unpopular opinion: I don't think she was pregnant at the end of the movie. Or if she was, I imagine long-term chronic cyanide poisoning would make her miscarry. I also don't think she ever saw Thomas' ghost again, but I do think she held onto the land around Allerdale Hall and reopened the mines- half to fulfill his dream as a last gift and half because it never hurts to have another source of income. I doubt she ever went back into the house, though.

Favorite relationship: Canon? With her father. I love the scenes where they interact, because it's clear how much they love each other and understand each other as people. We love a healthy fictional parent-child relationship in this house.

Fandom? I am currently the woman in that math meme, except trying to figure out how to morally break Edith in just the right way that she'd fall for Lucille. Without being totally unrecognizable as herself.

Favorite headcanon: It's not exactly headcanon, but Del Toro said Edith dislikes Christmas in her character bio, and I imagine that's because of just how many parties an upper-class American Christmas in the 1890s-early 1900s would involve. Maybe she can get out of going to some, but she's Carter's hostess, and since he enjoys "social frivolity" as much as she doesn't...I imagine she breathes a sigh of relief when January 7th comes around and she can finally just spend evenings by the fire with her manuscript and a cup of chocolate.

Lucille Sharpe

First impression: If Murder Bad Why Evil Lady Hot?

Impression now: I want to suit up in full body armor and give her a hug. She's such a mess, and she's a mess that you can't help feeling sympathy for. Obviously she does so much that's awful and horrifying, and none of it is justified (except killing her parents- they had it coming). But god...there's just SO MUCH below the surface to analyze and poke around in. That's what makes her so fascinating to write.

...also If Murder Bad Why Evil Lady Hot?

Favorite moment: It's not my favorite, but it's a moment I have many questions about. The part in the park where she tries to dissuade Thomas from going after Edith. Why did she do that? Was she objecting to Edith's youth because she actually has some scruples left? Was it just about her own insecurities in the face of a Sweet Young Thing(TM) who Thomas already seems way too interested in? Was it a slightly petulant complaint that Edith's company would be unbearably tiresome for even a few months?

I feel like the answer could say a lot about her as a person. If only we knew it.

Idea for a story: How long do you have? I'm writing a hurt/comfort fic right now about Thomas bringing her home from the asylum and the immediate aftermath thereof, so that's definitely an idea to explore.

Unpopular opinion: I think her relationship with Thomas is more or less consensual. Or at least, I don't think the fact that his eyes were closed when Edith caught them together means what the fandom seems to think it means (that he was uncomfortable). Like. He was kissing her shoulder and actively pulling her closer to him. His eyes may have been closed, but the body language doesn't exactly say "just getting through it" to me.

The power dynamic is undoubtedly screwed up, especially since they were 13 and 11 when everything started (according to Del Toro) and Lucille is not above laying on the guilt trips about everything she's done for him (according to the novelization). So it's still not a HEALTHY relationship, even besides the codependence and the fact that they're siblings. But I don't think Lucille is outright forcing Thomas to have sex with her, or ever has.

Favorite relationship: Canon- I mean. She has one non-murder-motivated relationship in canon, so...I find the Sharpe siblings somewhat endearing because I think, ultimately, they really do love each other. I bet she has a favorite among Thomas' automata, and I bet she could listen to him talk about his inventions for hours.

Fandom- I don't have to math meme this one. Lucille likes having Her People, to love and possess. Lucille likes women. Lucille thinks Edith is beautiful. Lucille has absolutely no scruples about pursuing what she wants, if she can allow herself to want it. This theme has been lovingly explored by fans many times over, and it never gets old to me.

Favorite headcanon: Lucille is an aesthete at heart. You can't tell me a woman who does housework in silk-velvet and owns that nightgown/robe set isn't hell-bent on beauty even at the expense of practicality. Gods help anyone who tried to offer decorating advice if they ever had gotten the house fixed up- she'd lovingly plan every single room herself, and accept no advice or criticism from anyone. (Except possibly Thomas, but I doubt even him.)

[mayquita]

Colin O’Donoghue on Playing Heroes and Villains in ‘Wizards,’ ‘The Right Stuff,’ and ‘Once Upon a Time’

From the creative mind of Guillermo del Toro and executive producers Marc Guggenheim and Chad Hammes, the final chapter in the Tales of Arcadia saga sees its characters go on an epic time-travel adventure in Camelot. Wizards follows Douxie (voiced by Colin O’Donoghue), a 900-year-old wizard-in-training who, along with Jim (voiced by Emile Hirsch), Claire (voiced by Lexi Medrano) and Steve (voiced by Steven Yeun), must ensure that good prevails over evil, in the escalating conflict between the human and magical worlds.

During this 1-on-1 phone interview with Collider, Colin O’Donoghue talked about being a part of the Tales of Arcadia world, why he was so delighted to get to voice an animated character, what he loved about his character’s journey, getting to revisit Camelot, and what the voice recording process was like. He also talked about why the upcoming Disney+ TV series The Right Stuff appealed to him, whether he was personally satisfied with the ending of Once Upon A Time, and the great time he had playing Captain Hook.

Collider: When this whole project originally came your way, did you know that Trollhunters would only be one part of this whole Tales from Arcadia world, and that there would be also be 3Below and Wizards?

COLIN O’DONOGHUE: I did. I understood that would be the case. I came in, in the second season of Trollhunters, and I knew the character would also be in 3Below. I was in the background, and a character that made people go, “Who is this guy? Why is he there?” I think it’s really good that was teased. It’s worked pretty well, and he was a lot of fun to play. Especially in Wizards, it was really great fun.

How did you get involved with this project? Was this something that you had to go through an audition process for?

O’DONOGHUE: What happened was that they reached out to my agents about it. It was a few years ago, so I can’t remember if I had to do a quick voice recording, just so that they could hear it. But I think that they’d seen Once Upon A Time and had heard my voice. I was stoked. I was delighted to get the offer. I couldn’t wait to do it. I was gonna go study animation in college, so I’ve always been fascinated with the whole process and I’ve always wanted to do an animated film.

This character definitely goes on a big journey in Wizards. What was it that you most responded to, with his story? What did you love about the journey that you got to take with him, now that he’s at the center of the story?

O’DONOGHUE: I loved the relationship with Merlin, and with Archie, as well. I thought it was fun to see him try to be this apprentice wizard, who so desperately wants to become a master wizard and prove himself to Merlin, and getting to see how he progresses, or if he’s even able to do it or not. That was something that I was really happy to explore.

What was it like to find and establish Douxie, in the beginning, in just these little bits, and then really get to dive into him and get to know him so much more, over this season? Did you always know who he would be, at the end, or were there things that you really got to learn about him, along the way?

O’DONOGHUE: I knew that he was a wizard, and I knew that he was quite a powerful wizard. It was just so much fun, having these tiny little things with him that made an impact with people. And then, to really get to do everything that I did on Wizards was fantastic because he really is a great character to play, and a lot of fun. And also, the writing on this show is just so great to get to live with for awhile and really explore.

It definitely seems a bit tricky to explore the origins of the entire mythology of the trilogy while also taking these characters on their own new adventure. How did you feel about the way that it all tied together and the way the story ends? What was your reaction to finding out how things would all play out, by the end of it?

O’DONOGHUE: I was amazing. Whether it was on this or on Once Upon A Time, I’m always amazed at how writers, especially in fantasy, keep track of everything, let alone tie it all together. I’m always amazed that they’re able to do that. And in Wizards, they’ve really done an incredible job of blending the three series together into this one final thing. I just think it’s so smart and so clever, the way they do it. I couldn’t do it. That’s why I’m an actor, and someone else is writing the show.

I was very impressed with how we get to see some of the past characters and we get to see the mythology of Camelot. Pulling all of that together was really impressive.

O’DONOGHUE: I was excited to get to go to Camelot again. We did a season of Once Upon A Time in Camelot, so it was fun to see the version of Camelot that they did in Wizards.

What was the recording process like on this? Were you always in a booth alone?

O’DONOGHUE: I was always alone. I live in Ireland, so most of what I did was done in a recording studio in Dublin. Sometimes, if I was in L.A., I’d go in, but it was always on my own. It’s interesting. It takes a little bit of getting used to because nobody is really feeding you lines. You just say each line, and take a stab at what you think the other character would be saying or reacting to. But I really enjoyed it. Once you get used to that, then it’s really a lot of fun. You get to really ham it up. Maybe a lot of people would say that I’m a ham, but you try to be a little bit more subtle, so it’s fun just to be able to go for it, in animation, because they animate it over the top lines.

Do you know what the time span of work was that you did on this?

O’DONOGHUE: No. It’s been a while. I can’t remember when we recorded the first recording for the first episode of this. It must be a year and a half ago, maybe. I’m not entirely sure. I was in Florida shooting The Right Stuff for five months last year, so it might even be two years. I’m not entirely sure.

Were there ever any major changes, along the way? Did anything change, while you were doing the recording of it, or did everything stay pretty close to the scripts?

O’DONOGHUE: I think everything stayed pretty close to the scripts, if I remember rightly. I don’t think there were any major changes. I might be wrong in this, but when the script was locked, it had gone through so many iterations, at that point. Because they’re creating everything, and every blade of grass, once the script is locked, that’s it. There can be an additional line sometimes, or you might have to do an alternative line, but in general, the script is pretty much locked.

When The Right Stuff came your way, what was it that most interested and excited you about that project?

O’DONOGHUE: I knew the book. I’d read the book, and I’d seen the movie. I’d actually had a meeting at Appian Way, a couple of years ago, and randomly, they gave me the book before there was ever a script, just to have a read of it. And it was one that I really wanted to do, but I was doing Once Upon A Time, at the time, so I didn’t know if I’d be free for anything. Getting to play Gordo Cooper, one of the Mercury Seven, was just amazing. Also, that time period in American history, and the style of it, being from Ireland, that’s America to me, with a ’59 Corvette, Coca Cola bottles, and that kind of style of buildings. And the pilot script was just absolutely fantastic. It was incredible. It was an amazing opportunity to get to play somebody who’s a real-life hero.

Is that the kind of project, as an actor, where it’s hard to get out of your own head? Especially when you’ve read the book and seen the movie and you connect to the project before you even go do it, is it hard to then deal with the pressure you put on yourself?

O’DONOGHUE: I didn’t have a huge amount of time to think about it because somebody else had been cast in the role and they fell out of it. I had a day and a half to figure out what I was going to do before I was on a plane to Florida. It was good ‘cause then I didn’t have time to put pressure on myself. I didn’t have time to panic about what my Oklahoma accent was gonna be. It was actually good, in that respect. So, I wasn’t really nervous about it. I knew the cast was amazing, and I knew the quality of the script and that Appian Way was involved. I was just really excited. And because I played Captain Hook for so long on a show and became so recognizable as that character, it was great to go do something completely different, in a completely different genre and style. I had to shave my beard and look completely different. And then, I got to play an astronaut and test pilot. Who doesn’t wanna do that?

After being on Once Upon A Time for so many seasons, and now having had some time and distance from the show, how do you ultimately feel about the ending and the send-off that your character got? Is it something that you feel personally satisfied and happy with?

O’DONOGHUE: Yeah. The end of Season 6 did exactly what I thought they should do to close off the story of all those characters in Storybrooke. And then, it was fun in Season 7 to get to explore a completely different version of Hook and such a different character. At the end of it all, it was important for Regina to get some sort of redemption. That was always the way that the show should finish. I’m also glad that Eddy [Kitsis] and Adam [Horowitz] had the opportunity to actually finish the show the way they wanted to finish it, and the way that they had seen it. The show wasn’t canceled before they had a chance to finish it.

Captain Hook must have been such a fun character to get to put your own stamp on.

O’DONOGHUE: Yeah, my version of Hook was the first time that he wasn’t an older, villainous, mustache-twirling kind of guy. As soon as I put on the black leather trousers, the coat, and the eyeliner, that was it. You become Captain Hook. It was fun to do that, and getting to play so many different variations of the character, over the year. That was the good thing about Once Upon A Time. There were so many different realms and time periods that they were in and out of, so it was great. He was a great character to get to play.

Wizards is available to stream at Netflix.

[ravenfirelair]

Trollhunters: rise of the titans movie review

!!!!!!!SPOILER WARNING!!!!!

so I just watched the conclusion movie of the tales of arcadia series and yeah, wow, there is a lot to unpack in this movie. First I’m gonna talk about what I liked about this movie then talk about what I didn’t like about this movie. I still liked all the characters in this movie, I thought they all had good conclusions to their story arches. I liked that jim despite not having the amulet anymore, it stills wants to continue the fight as the hero even thought he doubts himself as points. Toby was good in that is proves to be more in just a worthless character and willing to sacrifice his life for jim (quite literally!). Aja and claire were fucking queens! I did like that Aja took more a strong commending role and proved himself worthy to be queen and of course claire willing to put in everything she has was awesome. I thought the relationship that formed between douxie and nari was good, it made me feel for these two characters a bit more. The rest of the characters didn’t really do that much development wise, they mostly just filled their supporting roles in the fight, which really okay for this kind of movie.  

I thought the action was really good, though I thought it was a little too fast paced throughout the whole movie. I thought it needed some time just to slow down a bit so the viewer could get a bit of breather. Plus the movie gives you very little set up before getting straight into the action, which makes the viewer to have watched all the previous series to fully understand what is going on. But the fight scenes were really well done nonetheless. You can tell del toro wanted to put a lot of elements from his previous works into this movie as the fight between the giant akiridion robot and the fire titan was very pacific rim-ish. The animation was really good, I could tell the animators put the extra effort into the character animation, the textures, the effects and the lighting to make it more movie quality. I thought the music score was pretty good too, there were a few moments were the music really stood out. Something I kind of liked and didn’t like is the amount of character deaths in this movie. Hooray for more character death trauma! Yeah, I get some character deaths are necessary to up the stakes of the outcome in this movie, but I think this movie is a little to harsh in deaths. The character you least expect dies, which is toby. Yeah, this movie certainly does not pull back on any punches.  

Now to the stuff I didn’t like about this movie. First thing was steve’s weird pregnancy, WTF WAS UP WITH THAT?!! why was this needed?!  It felt like someone’s weird fetish fanfiction come to life and it felt kind of really disturbingly graphic to put in a kids movie. Secondly, I felt there were too many characters in this movie, yeah I get most of the characters from the previous series needed to be in this so everything connects to each other, but then they put in this new dragon character that was kind of like a villain and is barely in this movie for a few minutes. I was just like why was he necessary? Plus I felt the humor moments were kind of hit or miss, some jokes worked, but a lot of them really didn’t.

And of course the last thing, the ending. I have really mixed feelings about the ending. I didn’t mind so much that it was just basically I reset button type of thing, but that fact that toby becomes the new trollhunter, it just doesn't make any sense! Because A: The amulet only responds to the person who is destined to be the trollhunter right? So the amulet would not respond to toby as he is not destined to be a trollhunter. Then B: there is an episode that clearly shows what would happen if jim was never the trollhunter, that gunmar would win and all of arcadia would be destroyed. And then C: if jim is the only one that remembers all the events that happened in the previous time line, why would he put all the hardship, trauma and burden on toby? That seemed very out of character for him as he is not a person that wants to put huge responsibility on others. Plus in the trollhunter series it clearly shows jim is willing to take on the responsibility of being a trollhunter by himself just so his friends won’t have to risk their lives for him. And finally D: did jim choose toby to be the trollhunter because he thought by doing so it would change events in the renewed time line? But if jim is the only one who remembers the events that happened in the previous time line, wouldn’t he become the trollhunter again and figured out ways to prevent those tragic events from ever happening in the first place? I don’t know, this decision to make toby the next trollhunter felt very confusing and stupid to me.

So resetting the timeline does mean all the characters that had died in the all 3 series have come back to life now (including tronos madu, so that gives some glimmer of hope) because the events that lead up to their deaths have not happened yet. So that means all the good characters are back, but so are all villains, so that means jim and others would have to face all the villains all over again and I’m not sure jim could handle going through all that again. Also the reset button ending didn’t feel deserved, like jim reset the timeline only because the cost of lives was too high, but it’s not like their sacrifices were done in vain because jim won the battle in the end. It would of made more sense for the reset if jim didn’t win in the end and he reset the timeline just so they could start over and could figure out a way to win in the end.

Also I feel there were a lot of unanswered questions the movie didn’t address, like what happened to all the other trolls the used to live in troll market? Did they ever find a new home? Did jim just abandon them after the events that happened in Wizards? What happened to all those babies that got replaced by changelings? What happened to all those other wizard and witch characters in arcadia that was revealed in Wizards? How did their underground society really work? Why did zadra never come back with aja and varvatos vex in the movie? In the movie Blinky said the only heartstone was the one that was destroyed in troll market under arcadia, but didn’t blinky mention that there was another one in new jersey somewhere? Whatever happened to that one? But I guess none of that matters now because everything ended up being undone by the timeline reset anyway.

Overall, I did really enjoy this movie despite it’s flaws and it’s disappointing and confusing ending. I’m not going to let a few minutes of the end spoil the whole movie for me. I thought it was a good conclusion to the overall arching storyline of the trilogy series. As for rating this trilogy series as a whole, I thought it could have been better honesty, it felt like this series had a strong start, but soon lost it’s steam by the end. I think there were a lot butting heads in the per-production of the series as I felt there were a lot of ideas and concepts that never got fully utilized either due to run time or budget constraints. Plus I think this series suffered from “too many chefs in the kitchen” syndrome, where too many people lead the direction of this series with all of them wanting to put in their own ideas into it and ended up with del toro not having much control over it. Still I thought this trilogy was really interesting and entertaining enough, I thought it one one those middle ground kids show that was not afraid to go to those dark places and put more mature adult elements into it. And I still thought what guillermo del toro tried to accomplish with this series was ambitious, even if some of the parts didn’t fix together in the end.  

[365days365movies]

March 1, 2021: The Hobbit (1977) (Part 1)

In a hole in the ground, there lived a Hobbit.

When I was 9, my school let us read a very special book, originally meant for kids, but beloved by everyone. My folks and I went to Borders Books (FUCK ME, I miss Borders), and we got an illustrated copy of J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Hobbit. I can’t find that book, but if I ever find it again, Imma buy it IMMEDIATELY, I tell you what. And...oh shit, it’s on Amazon for $12? 

Well. I just made that purchase, I guess. But yeah, I loved that book when I was a kid, and this was during the same year that Peter Jackson’s Lord of the Rings trilogy began, with Fellowship, of course. And I wouldn’t end up watching those until a few years later, but I loved those too when I saw them. And I’ve NEVER seen the abridged version, by the way, I’ve only ever seen the extended editions.

Although, I can’t call myself a hardcore fan. I’ve never read the Silmarillion, for example. Although, weirdly, I wanted it as a kid at some point, so I was almost there. But no, I ended up getting into comic books hardcore instead, so I can’t tell you the history of Tom Bombadil, but I can tell you about at least one of the fuckin’ 87 tieles that the Legion of Super-Heroes has been involved in. I’m not gonna like it though.

...Yes, I will, who am I kidding, I love the Legion. Anyway, I’ve still always been a fan of the franchise, and I was extremely excited when Jackson announced that he’d be doing an adaptation of The Hobbit! Seriously, I WAS FUCKING PUMPED, you have no idea. I re-read the book, I was super-excited...and then Harry Potter changed EVERYTHING. Kind of.

See, Harry Potter’s development as a two films made from one book seemed to kick off a trend. Breaking Dawn and Mockingjay are the two that immediately come to mind, as does this film. However, to be fair...that’s probably a coincidence. Yeah, this film was originally developed as two parts, WAY before Deathly Hallows got that treatment. And even then, Jackson and Del Toro had difficulty breaking it up into two parts, and three ended up being easier. Still...the change from two-to-three does feel a little connected to that trend.

Anyway, in celebration of that decision, I’m gonna break this review into three parts! Yes. Really. I want to see if it works. And so, let’s talk about the other most famous adaptation of this book by talking about its creators.

Yup. Rankin-Bass did 2D-animated cartoons, too! And this was one of their most famous ones, dating back to 1977. But wait! There’s more! This was followed by Ralph Bakshi’s version of Lord of the Rings by a different studio. You know, this one?

Yeah, that one. It was only based on the first two books, Fellowship and Towers. But it was technically unconnected to the Rankin-Bass version. Which is why it was REALLY weird when Rankin-Bass came out with an adaptation of the third book, Return of the King, right afterwards!

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE. Because both of Rankin-Bass’ specials were animated by a Japanese studio called Topcraft, who’d actually worked with Rankin-Bass for years. But then, they went bankrupt a few years later, and was bought by Isao Takahata, Toshio Suzuki, and...Hayao Miyazaki. And it was renamed as...

So, this is a Hobbit adaptation produced by the Rudolph people and animated by the people who would eventually become Studio Ghibli. Well, uh...holy fucking shit. Let’s DO THIS BABY. SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap (1/3)

As we’re wont to do in this story, we head to Hobbiton in the Shire, where we meet Bilbo Baggins (Orson Bean). A simple Hobbit in a simple home, with a happy and simple life. But one day, he’s approached by Gandalf (John Huston), who seeks a burglar to help with the mission of a group of dwarves, led by Thorin Oakenshield (Hans Conried).

We also immediately start off with two songs from the original book, and I have to say that I like them a but better in the Jackson movies, but they’re still well performed here. Anyway, after dinner, the true goal of their quest is given. Beneath Lonely Mountain, the ancestral home of the Dwarves, there was a kingdom ruled by the King Under the Mountain, Thorin’s grandfather.

Through reading the lyrics of the song “Far over the Misty Mountains,” Thorin tells the tale of the takeover of the Dwarves’ great golden hoard by the dragon Smaug. Bilbo is tasked to help the Dwarves steal back the treasure stolen from them. And, while he’s extremely reluctant to be a part of all this, Gandalf basically forces him to, the pushy bastard. And Bilbo’s Greatest Adventure now lies ahead!

Speaking of, here’s the song “The Greatest Adventure”, sung by Glenn Yarborough, who is the living personification of vibrato. Fuckin’ seriously, this guy’s voice is ridiculous, but I love it so much. As the night passes underneath Glenn Yarborough’s hypnotically shaky voice, and uncertain, Bilbo stares out at the moon. Once it’s over, we’re on our way to the Misty Mountains.

Bilbo’s having a tough time with the long journey and rough weather, and it doesn’t get much better when they encounter a trio of trolls. They send out Bilbo to try and steal some mutton from them, but he’s IMMEDIATELY a failure, and also manages to tell the trolls that the dwarves are present. Nice one, Bilbo. The trolls catch all of the dwarves, although Bilbo manages to escape. 

The trolls argue about how to cook the dwarves, but before they get to do anything, Gandalf shows up and summons the dawn, turning the trolls into stone and saving the dwarves. While they’re initially quite frustrated by Bilbo’s failure, he makes it up by discovering a horde of goods and weapons stolen by the trolls. This is also where Bilbo gets his classic weapon, Sting.

Gandalf, cheeky bastard that he is, suddenly reveals a map that he’s kept secret from Thorin, its rightful owner. Bilbo, a classic cartomaniac, is able to interpret the map. But there are also runes that they can’t quite read. And so, Gandalf brings them to his friend, Elrond (), who’s wearing a sick-ass glittery tiara that’s hovering off his head. How come Hugo Weaving didn’t have that?

Anyway, Elrond identifies the swords that Thorin and Gandalf grabbed as Orcrist, the Goblin-Cleaver and Glamdring, the Foe-Hammer, because FUCK YEAH, BABY, those are some fuckin’ NAMES! WHOOOOOO!

Anyway, he also points them in the direction of the mountain, and shows them hidden features to the map. They head through the mountains after this, and rest in a cave. Unfortunately, this cave is on Goblin territory, and the group (sans Gandalf, who’s disappeared to make out with Cate Blanchett or whatever) is quickly ambushed by a group of now-horned Goblins, who chant their song as they go “Down, Down, to Goblin-Town”. Which is a song that I love, unironically. It compels me to sing along.

The Goblins nearly kill them when they discover Orcrist in Thorin’s possession, but they’re saved by the sudden appearance of Gandalf with the glowing sword Glamdring. He kills the Great Goblin, and the group run out with the Goblins in hot pursuit. Well, except for Bilbo.

Yeah, Bilbo falls into a cavern below the mountain, and the dwarves think him gone for good. However, he’s miraculously safe on the ground, having landed in an underground aquifer, in which lives THE GREATEST CHARACTER IN THE MIDDLE-EARTH FRANCHISE FUCKIN’ AT ME I DARE YOU

And just so we’re clear, I’m not talking about the film version only, I’m talking about Gollum/Smeagol in general. Granted, I don’t want a film starring him or anything (coughCruellacoughcoughMaleficentcoughcoughClaricecoughcough), but I love this dissociative little dude so much. He’s one of my favorite fantasy characters in general, and is also maybe the best example of a sympathetic villain, in film at least.

OK, to be fair, I love Andy Serkis’ version of the character a LOT, like a LOT a lot, and it’s a great version of the character. OK, so what do I think of this version? He’s...interesting, actually. If I’m honest, I kinda like him. This is similar to how I always pictured Gollum when I was a kid.

I mean, listen to this description from the book, yeah?

Deep down here by the dark water lived old Gollum, a small slimy creature. I don't know where he came from, nor who or what he was. He was Gollum - as dark as darkness, except for two big round pale eyes in his thin face...He was looking out of his pale lamp-like eyes for blind fish, which he grabbed with his long fingers as quick as thinking.

I dunno, that does sound more like this version of Gollum to me, just saying. Anyway, while Gollum is off fishing in the water, Bilbo gets up on the shore, where he finds a little golden ring Not important, just a ring, definitely means nothing at all, NOTHING AT ALL, NOTHING TO SEE HERE.

The hungry Gollum (Brother Theodore) happens upon Bilbo, precious, wonders if Bilbo would taste good, and is basically about to kill him for his sweet hobbit meat, before Bilbo takes out Sting. Now afraid, Gollum offers a game of riddles. The two make a deal: if Bilbo wins at a game of riddles, Gollum will show him the  way out. But if Gollum wins, precious will eat him raaaaaaaw and wrrrrrrrrrriggling!

The riddles commence, in a super-fuckin’-classic moment, and also ends with maybe the most bullshit moment in all of fantasy lore. After clever riddles with answers involving eggs, wind, and time, Bilbo’s last riddle is “What’s in my pocket?” The fuck, Bilbo, that’s absolute BULLSHIT!

Not that it matters. Bilbo wins, but Gollum goes to find his ring to show it to Bilbo before he takes him away. Thing is, though, that’s what was in Bilbo’s pocket, which Gollum quickly figures out, my precious. He’s about to kill Bilbo to get back his birthday present, precious, but Bilbo discovers the secret trick of the ring: it turns the wearer invisible, AND THAT WILL NEVER BE A BAD THING EVER.

Gollum thinks that Bilbo’s escaped and runs after him toward the exit. This, of course, leads Bilbo towards the exit inadvertently, and he follows Gollum, then jumps over him to get back. To which Gollum screams the following:

Thief! Thief! Baggins! We hates it! Hates it! Forever!

I hear you, buddy. I hear you. Well, once Bilbo escapes, he reconvenes with the rest, and shares his adventure in the cave, but leaves out the ring. And Gandalf seems to know, based on his dialogue. And I checked, and he figured it out in the book and Jackson movie, too. And I gotta say...WHAT THE FUCK GANDALF

I mean...DUDE. CHECK UP on that shit. Do you wizard job, man! If you’d been like, “Dude...you didn’t find a magic ring that turns you invisible, ight, because we’re FUCKED if you did”, NONE OF THE LORD OF THE RINGS WOULD’VE HAPPENED, AND BOROMIR WOULD STILL BE ALIVE

Everybody talks about the fuckin’ eagles, but WHY DO I NEVER HEAR ANYONE MENTION THIS SHIT? Gandalf the Grey: Middle-Earth’s most irresponsible asshole, I swear...

This seems like a good place to pause, actually. See you in the next part!

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Good morning! Whats your favorite show/movie? Who are your favorite characters? Why do you like them so much? Also!! Did you have a good sleep?

Okay so I was a film major for a while, and I have opinions. 

Penny Dreadful 

I love this show. Like, so much. I adore it. I can not get enough of that show. Just all of the imagery, and the fantastic writing and acting. The episode intro alone is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. Eva Green is a goddess and I love everything she’s been in. The take on classic horror stories is So Good, and it actually became the inspiration for my Gay Frankenstein story! (Started as a stitch AU, and then went completely OC after I had Ideas) but the show itself is so intimate? I think it’s largely that the period they’re in, everything was so repressed and restricted. So when the characters break out of those moments, it’s more meaningful. And the love-hate relationship between Ms. Ives and Malcolm in season one? Exquisite.  I could literally write essay’s about this show, but I’ll restrain myself and just say: it’s the best ensemble show I’ve ever seen. The characters come together, but they also each have their own distinct lives that sometimes intersect, but in s2 especially, are quite separate. They are constant with one another like ensemble shows usually portray. Also gothic horror and romance? My absolute favorite. 

Anything by Guillermo del Toro

This man Owns My Entire Soul. I’m not even joking, everything he writes and directs is perfection. Crimson Peak is probably my favorite (I have a stitch AU for this too ;) ) because again, Gothic horror and romance. I’m a slut for that shit. Also Tom Hiddleston and Jessica Chastain? Delightful casting. I think it’s obvious by now that I love tragic relationships, so their dynamic is *chef’s kiss* amazing. they’re so damaged. And this quote right here is one of the BEST things I’ve ever read: 

“But the horror... The horror was for love. The things we do for love like this are ugly, mad, full of sweat and regret. This love burns you and maims you and twists you inside out. It is a monstrous love and it makes monsters of us all.”

Engrave that on my headstone, please?? I’ve got a sort-of Dorian Gray AU (it’s delightful) that’s basically built on this entire premise. Mitch makes the mistake of falling in love with Stiles, and does many terrible things because of it. Mostly to himself, at least. 

I think my love of Crimson Peak is very closely tied with The Shape of Water. another beautiful movie, I could wax poetic about this forever. it was beautifully written, and such an artistic movie. I love the way it was filmed, and the set design, and all of the subtle imagery. Such as Elisa’s apartment being cast in cooler tones, it always felt very damp and had evidence of water damage, compared to Giles’, a mirror image of her own, in more warm tones. This is another one I could (and have) write essays about. There is so much packed into this movie, from the themes on toxic masculinity and entitlement, to the conversation on queerness and race and disability, and how all the various relationships are portrayed. Like. there is so much to pick apart in this movie. 

Aside from that, ofc Hell Boy deserves an honorable mention because i grew up on those movies. I’m pretty sure the Golden Army especially is responsible for who I am today, given all the lore on the fae in that universe. Wow, that explains so much about me... Also one of my first WoW characters was an elf named Nuala xD I still have her, too, and it’s been like 12 years lol

Near-Future Sci-Fi

Sci-fi is one of my favorite genres, I am a huge nerd for theoretical and astrophysics. But my favorite kind of sci-fi is the stuff that still takes place on Earth, rather than epic battles in space. Ex Machina and Annihilation are at the top of that list. Alex Garland is another writer/director that I love. He has the same kind of approach as del Toro, where he puts a lot of fine details into his work. And I love that it’s very cerebral; there are so many layers to Ex Machina. My English 101 prof actually refused to analyze it in class when I suggested it to him, because he didn’t think my class could. Basically handle? Dissecting that movie? Because a lot of it comes across as very surface level, but in some cases when you look deeper, it’s actually suggesting the opposite of what you might think at first glance. (And he was right, my fellow students were awful. I miss that class though, it was one of my favorites T_T Mr. Ryder was an awesome dude and super chill.) 

Morgan is another good example. As you can see, I fucking love androids lol. Which brings me to another of my all time favorite movies: Cloud Atlas. I could literally watch this movie endlessly, I love it so much. The acting, the writing, the filming, all of it is top notch. And one thing they did in the movie that didn’t come across in the book, was reusing the same actors through the different eras in the book. That was just so neat, because it really encapsulates how connected these souls are, as we follow the threads of their story throughout time. If you haven’t seen the movie, I can’t recommend it enough.  

Another one I always think of alongside Cloud Atlas, even though they aren’t related at all, is Predestination. It’s a great movie that explores the idea of fate and free will in a really clever way, utilizes time travel in a very organized way that I think was neat (think Umbrella Academy. They even use briefcases! As you can see, I love sci-fi bureaucracy, it’s fun. In fact The Bureau is another movie I enjoyed) and the main character is actually, explicitly trans, which was cool. You basically get to see the entire story of their life, and I don’t want to spoil anything, but it’s just. So good. Mindfuckery galore. 

Shoot, and I almost forgot! Arrival! That is one of the best movies, and another one I could watch nonstop. It focuses on mathematics and linguistics and I swear to god, I almost altered my entire college course because of this movie. Amy Addams is brilliant, Jeremy Renner is so soft and nerdy, and again, it has an amazing take on time travel. I am very particular about how time is handled in Sci-fi, and this portrayal was one of my favorite. (Most of my physics studies have been dedicated to the theory of time, so like. Strong Opinions.) 

Fantasy

Stardust! It wasn’t until Good Omens can out that I realized Neil Gaiman is responsible for most of the stories I loved as a kid lol, and I had no idea he wrote stardust! But that is such a beautiful movie (I have a Stardust AU lol) and it’s definitely one of my comfort movies. Captain Shakespeare is one of the best characters ever, bless Robert de Niro. I would die for him. Fun fact, i had no idea Ipswitch was a real place until like. 2019. I 100% thought it was made up for the movie 😂

Alongside Stardust, I’ve always loved The Golden Compass. It’s fantasy, but also with that old-timey steampunk science feel, which is so fun and surprisingly difficult to find! 

Mortal Engines also has the same kind of feel, and it was such an epic movie in every sense of the word. I’m a little sad that after all the work that went into it, it didn’t get a dedicated following or fan base, because I feel there’s so much potential in it. But at the same time, fandom tends to gather around media that has plenty of flaws for us to repair with gold, and there wasn’t much room for that in Mortal Engines. 

I’m going to put Jupiter Ascending here even though it technically fits with the sci-fi, because that section is long as fuck and also this movie has such a fantastic feel. Mila Kunis? beautiful. The CGI? beautiful. Eddy Redmayne? One of the best villain portrayals i’ve ever seen. The whole oedipal vibe he had was immaculate, as was their portrayal of reincarnation, and just. The world building. GOD. I get so weak for through world building. Also the fkn intergalactic bureaucracy when they’re basically at the space DMV? One of my all time favorite scenes in movie history. 

Horror

I have very little room in my life for horror. As I said, I have strong movie opinions, especially when it comes to horror movies. I don’t like how most of them rely on cheap jump scares and overused gore and gratuitous rape scenes, instead of, y'know, actual good writing. 

Which is EXACTLY why I adore It: Chapter 1 & 2. It has none of those things, but still manages to be so terrifying. They are my favorite horror movies, and I’m saying this as someone who has genuine childhood trauma bc of the novel. Like. I couldn’t shower/take baths alone until I was almost 10 T_T When I was 6-7 and saw kids play by storm drains, I would run over screaming about how Pennywise was going to get them. Like, I had issues man. I was terrified to see the first one, and wouldn’t go until I could go with my best friend after she had already seen it, so she could warn me when something scary was about to happen 😂

And, one of my favorite aspects of the movie, and the thing that gave me Mad Respect for Any Muschietti? The way he filmed Bev and her father. They have a character who is literally being molested, but they never once have to show it. And yet their interactions are still so viscerally upsetting to watch. Sexploitation puts me off of most horror, and the fact that Muschietti doesn’t use it here, even when it would be actually somewhat justified? *chef’s kiss*. I love him. 

I love horror as a concept, I’m just really picky about it because I expect the writing to be good. I don’t like short cuts. But in a lot of cases, even if I don’t enjoy the movie itself, I love to watch analysis videos on youtube! I love to see the philosophy and symbolism in different horror movies, even if i don’t like to watch the movies themselves. It’s a fun hobby. 

Misc. 

Then in general, some other stuff I love in no particular order:

The Internship (Bless Dylan, Stuart is such a bitch and I love him) 

American Assassin (ofc. The writing itself is eh, but Mitch is my man) 

Dylan’s episode of Weird City. (I actually have a lot of feelings about this one. Jordan Peele is another amazing writer/director, I really need to catch up on his works.) 

Dorian Gray (*chef’s kiss*)

Rogue One (Makes me cry every time) 

WARCRAFT (Obviously this is a fav. It made me so happy, words cannot express.) 

Coraline and most other stop motion animation. I’ve always had a soft spot in my heart for that. 

Literally anything associated with Tim Burton. Fun fact, when I was 12 and in middle school, I planned to decorate my future house inspired by tim burton. Like, i had Plans. 

Most adaptations of Alice in Wonderland!

So! this got long as fuck! But you said you like that kind of thing lol 😂 I had kinda Eh sleep since I was up so late lmao, and I kept waking up (as usual, rip). And I’m so mad I go up for nothing! The dude I was supposed to show my listing to never showed, and is refusing to answer my calls >_> It’s been 2 hours now, and I still haven’t heard from him. But whatever, I already have a full price cash offer on the house so who cares. And that means I can play WoW all day, now! 

[ratingtheframe]

Enola Holmes, The Devil All the Time and i’m thinking of ending things: Everything I watched in September.

Thank God we are almost at the end of the year. With October just around the corner and 2021 in full view, it seems like the film industry is slowly piecing themselves back together after months of being on a complete hiatus. Cinemas are slowly starting to return back to normal and streaming services are now full to capacity with content.

Netflix in particular has some exciting things to come and the successful release of Harry Bradbeer’s Enola Holmes and Antonio Campos’ The Devil All the Time, has proven that their ability to produce outstanding content hasn’t been stunted at all by COVID-19. Here are the 31 titles I watched this month and for you to add to your watch list. 

Searching (2018) as seen on Netflix

Searching recently came onto Netflix, however the film was actually first released in 2018, screening at Sundance Film Festival. It had a very impressive response and grossed $75 million worldwide and with a budget of only $880,000 it was certainly a success. I rate this film highly, due to the simplicity and execution of it, with a lot of twists and turns in appropriate places. Structurally, the film is flawless and it’s clear a lot of thought had gone into the payoff of the entirety of the film. Certainly an indie filmmaker's dream and a film to watch to learn about the “less is more” rule of screenwriting.

Score: 10/10

Zodiac (2007) as seen on Netflix

I’ve been avoiding Zodiac on Netflix for a loooong time, and after watching it I wonder why I didn’t check it out sooner. David Fincher’s (Fight Club, Panic Room, the Social Network) thriller based on the case files of the “Zodiac Killer” stars the likes of Mark Ruffalo, Robert Downey Junior and Jake Gyllenhaal, all of which had amazing on screen chemistry. The dialogue and structure is Aaron Sorkin-esque as you figuratively become one the detectives, unravelling the case as the two and a half hour film delves deeper and deeper. You honestly feel as if you become one of the team whilst watching Zodiac and just for that, it goes down as a praise worthy film with a perfect structure and surprising twist to the end. Zodiac is the thriller of thrillers.

Score: 11/10

I See You (2019) as seen on Netflix

Now a film like I see you has me questioning

Netflix’s

choices a little. The film scores handsomely on

Rotten Tomatoes

, with a metric score of

78%,

which is quite high for a largely gimmicky film. I can’t quite fault the overall concept, however the story itself fell flat by the end. Things just seemed to mount too much to the point that it became overtly inauthentic and questionable. Instead of paying attention to the movie, I found myself picking up all the irregularities such as why a police man would suffocate someone, drive them to their own home and then shoot them in the head. Surely a policeman would just leave her in the woods? On a brighter note,

Judah Lewis’ (Babysitter: Killer Queen)

was quite praiseworthy in his performance, but it wasn’t enough to drag the film out of a hole of confusion.

Score: 2/10

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998) as seen on Netflix

If there is one film that you NEED to watch from this list, it would be Terry Gilliam’s Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. The crackhead energy in this film is OFF THE CHARTS as Johnny Depp and Benecio Del Toro play two drug addicts exploring Las Vegas. The production design in this is marvellous and really captures the psychedelic world the two men enter every time they’re high. I particularly enjoyed Depp’s narration throughout this; his voice is the most sensual yet hilarious thing to listen to for 2 hours straight. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas is HILARIOUS and such a well rounded, off the wall film to watch.

Score: 12/10

I’m thinking of ending things (2020) as seen on Netflix 

Even though I watched i’m thinking of ending things nearly a month ago, I’m still recovering from it. Charlie Kaufman (Adaptation, Being John Malkovich) directs this satisfying yet highly confusing tale based on the Iain Reid book with the same title. Despite it’s perplexing plot, I certainly can’t fault the film’s performances or set design. Jesse Plemons, Jess Buckley, Toni Colette and David Thwelis made a surprisingly good ensemble and the makeup in this film is probably the best I have ever seen. HOWEVER and this is a big however, the waywardness of the story can’t override the success of artistry behind the film. I feel like there’s becoming a trend where films are visually perfect but make zero sense. By sense I mean a clear, concise story, that has character journeys and some sort of resolution at the end, no matter how big or small. I’m thinking of ending things that had just about NONE of these elements, and that doesn’t make it a bad film at all. It’s certainly not a film I’ve seen before and perhaps it raises the questions whether films need to make complete sense in order for them to be good. We can take a look at experimental cinema to delve deeper into that theory, for within this type of cinema, films can still be appreciated even when they are confusing. Perhaps the meaning of i’m thinking of ending things, is more powerful and higher than the average movie goer can understand, but still appreciate.

score: 9/10

Hacksaw Ridge (2016) as seen on Amazon Prime

Again, another film I’ve been avoiding for a loooong time and regret not watching sooner. The film stars Andrew Garfield as a devoted Christian who goes to war to serve his country, but refuses to carry a weapon yet lives to tell the tale. Preacher Desmond T. Doss saved the lives of between 50-100 men on Hacksaw Ridge during the Second World War. He was heavily commended for his service and the film itself earnt 6 Academy Award nominations. It’s a story that was born to be on screen and it’s hard to believe it was all true. Andrew Garfield’s performance was exemplary and he is definitely underrated as a truthful actor.

Score: 10/10

Fear (1996) as seen on Netflix 

I am sucker for a thriller, good OR bad and this one from 1996 was surprisingly decent. Starring Mark Wahlberg and Reese Witherspoon in their early days, Fear follows a pair of young lovers whose strong relationship turns into a possessive one, when Witherspoon’s character, Nicole learns the true intentions of her boyfriend. It's a 90s teen flick that isn’t talked about enough and certainly an easy one to get sucked into as a guilty pleasure.

Score: 10/10

Make Up (2019) as seen at the BFI Southbank 

Make Up first screened at the London Film Festival last year and was later released this year. I wanted to catch it at the festival and was glad it made it into cinemas. The eeriness of the british film directed by Claire Oakley, was a slow burnt, intriguing watch, however as artistically visual it was, a satisfying resolution to the film was missed. The payoff of the story was easy to define despite it’s ambiguity, however it wasn’t as hard hitting as it should’ve been, which is common in most indie features. The better ones expose ideas and truths in a punchy way, such as La Haine or Whiplash. The film’s genre was also undefinebale and although the story was interesting, I wouldn't be inclined to come back for more of it. 

Score: 7/10

Zoolander (2001) as seen on Netflix

I’m not a huge comedy fan, however it’s about time I watched Zoolander, for it’s probably one of the most iconic films of the early 2000s. The film follows a model targeted by a fashion brand who wants him to kill the prime minister of Malaysia. Anyone who was anyone in the 00s is in this film, from Naomi Campbell to Lil’ Kim, Paris Hilton, Donald Trump, Lenny Kravitz, Natalie Porter and even David Bowie. How they managed to get these famous faces as well as the actual cast (Owen Wilson, Ben Stiller and Will Ferrell) onto this film is certainly a mastery at casting. As far as comedies go, Zoolander is iconic and a must watch for those who are thoroughly in love with these types of outlandish films. 

Score: 8/10

American Pie (2001) as seen on Netflix 

This is the my first time seeing American Pie and for someone who hates comedies, it thoroughly made me laugh. I definitely had to look past at the amount of misogyny and questionable scenes in this film and just sit back and enjoy it all. I felt that all four leads (Jason Briggs, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Chris Klein and Eddie Kaye Thomas) were well casted as an ensemble and were really down to earth in their performances. They were authentic in being high school boys still figuring themselves out and in the end I found each one to be highly likeable. As a comedy, this is definitely a go to and an iconic film from the early 2000s. 

Score: 9/10

Clemency (2019) as seen on Amazon Prime 

A Sundance Film Festival graduate, Clemency was a deeply moving and well shot film that exposed the shocking reality of prison inmates on death row in the US. The word clemency is essentially a term used to define an act of mercy by the justice system, who at the last minute of a prison’s life can grant “clemency” if they feel worthy of doing so, stopping them from being executed. Factors such as new evidence or a parole grant can influence this decision and this film shows the abrasiveness of such an idea. Imagine being a prisoner moments away from death and because of Clemency, you sit there thinking your life can still be saved. But as this film depicts, this isn’t always the case and the masterful acting of Alfre Woodard puts this grief into context beautifully. Her performance ignited this film and it was easy to see this story got to her on a deeper level, that went beyond serving a character. A seriously good film that is professional, dynamic and heart wrenching.

Score: 10/10

Gladiator (2000) as seen on Netflix

I never saw myself as someone who would like Gladiator, however Ridley Scott’s Oscar winning film thoroughly surprised me in an unexpected way. Moving past the amazing visuals and outstanding production value of this film, the actual story itself was just so damn good. It had an excellent, Hollywood worthy structure that saw a hefty and clear journey of it’s lead, Maximus (Russell Crowe). I was VERY surprised to see Joaquin Phoenix play alongside Russell Crowe, who gave a great performance as a bratty roman emperor. Gladiator was nominated for 12 Academy Awards in 2001, which is unsurprising seeing as it's a pretty much flawless film, with the character’s fierce journey being the main contributor to this. 

Score: 11/10

American Pie 2 (2001) as seen on Netflix 

Now sequels are known to be the downfall of some films, especially as the first films were okay on their own. However, I definitely enjoyed American Pie 2 as much as I enjoyed the first. The performances of all characters seemed to get better with time and it still remained outlandish and hilarious to watch. 

Score: 9/10

3096 days (2013) as seen on Netflix

When you laugh more at a film than you should have, there’s something clearly wrong. This Netflix film based on the true story of the kidnapped Natascha Kampusch was directed by German-American director Sherry Hormann. This is gonna sound whack, but one of the most annoying things about this film was the lighting. It felt as if it was never truly dark in this film and because of that, it distracted from the fear of the situation young Natascha was in. Lighting plays an important role in thrillers and horror films, as the idea of these films is to keep people constantly on edge and the dark is something that does that perfectly. I felt safe when watching this film and although it’s meant to be a biopic, I don’t think it captured Natascha’s situation as best as it could have. Another thing that really let the film down was the dubbing from German to English. This is a pet peeve I have with films, but is understandable seeing as the majority of people are too lazy to follow foreign language subtitles and miss out on some of the best films ever made. Because of this, it forces foreign language films to cater towards an English speaking market so the film becomes more viable. I would’ve respected this film a lot more if it was completely in German and had English subtitles.

Score: 5/10

Cruel Intentions (1999) as seen on Netflix

About a year ago, I saw the Glenn Close and John Malkovich film version of the french novel Dangerous Liaisons and I fell asleep. Maybe it was the film I had seen before it that had made me nod off or the fact I couldn’t understand what the hell was going on. However, Cruel Intentions follows the same story with younger leads; Sarah Michelle Geller, Ryan Phillipe and Reese Witherspoon and is set in the modern day. As you can probably tell by now, I am a sucker for a 90s teen movie and Cruel Intentions was all that and more, for the performances and story structure in this film were top notch. Ryan Phillipe is a much underrated actor and heartthrob, playing a jealous and callous Sebastian, the step brother of Sarah Michelle Geller’s character, Kathryn. Both of them were spiteful, abrasive and mean and I LOVED IT. Their non-fuckery was enviable as they cheat and turn the lives of others upside down. Reese Witherspoon was an angel in this film, and I thoroughly appreciated the strength of her character throughout. Cruel Intentions sits highly as a film from the 90s and boasts a hoard of young talent from that era.

Score: 10/10

Wildlife (2018) as seen on Netflix

If you are in love with Paul Dano as much as I am, you’re gonna want to marry him after you find out that he’s also a director. His first feature Wildlife, stars Jake Gyllenhaal and Carey Mulligan as a couple battling the demons in their relationship whilst caring for their young son. I really really REALLY can’t wait to see what Paul Dano directs in the future based off this film. It’s everything I love about a good indie film; well shot, a perfect cast and a touching story. It truly is a beautiful film and one I would recommend to my indie lovers out there.

Score: 10/10

The Perks of Being A Wallflower (2012) as seen on Netflix

My excuse for not having seen The Perks of Being A Wallflower is that I thought it would be yet another predictable high school blunder, with flat dialogue and basic character arcs. And I was half right in that. The first half of the film (mostly exposition) was filled with cringey dialogue and basic high school motifs that set up the film. Some moments were overtly far fetched and it took me a while to fall in love with the main character instead of feeling desperately sorry for him ALL THE TIME. Ezra Miller, Emma Watson and Logan Lerman all together as an ensemble was whack casting that just about worked. However, once we made it through the blizzard of exposition and got to the heart of the story, it truly was a touching and tear jerking movie to watch and for that, it scores highly. “We accept the love we think we deserve” was the ringing message of the film and certainly something I carry around with me daily as I reflect on the unfulling crushes I’ve had in the past.

Score: 9/10

The Devil All the Time (2020) as seen on Netflix

Probably my most favourite film on this list, The Devil All the Time is pure ART. I have a full review uploaded onto my tumblr account so please do check it out to see an in depth review of the Netflix film. All I will say is that it is a must watch film with an unreal cast and story.

https://ratingtheframe.tumblr.com/post/629443058079055872/the-south-of-america-meets-gritty-gothic-horror

Score: 11/10

Way of the Gun (2000) as seen on Amazon Prime 

Ryan Phillipe and Benicio del Toro star side by side in this action packed crime thriller about two guys who kidnap the wrong woman. Simple in it’s log line with the potentiality to be limitless in its telling; ie the basis of every good film. Juliette Lewis (the it girl of the 90s) also stars in the film and really compliments the performances of both leads. Any film that Juliette Lewis is in, is a good film and she is an actor with a very impressive portfolio of work under her belt.

Score: 9/10

Judy and Punch (2019) as seen on Netflix

I’ve been waiting since the end of last year to see Judy and Punch and was thrilled to see it had been put onto Netflix. However, after watching it, that thrill deteriorated and what was left was a disheartened feeling towards this film. It’s a shame to say this, seeing as the story of Judy and Punch is so satiable and fulfilled in its possibilities of telling it. However, probably the biggest problem within this film was its pace; it was too quick of a film. The beginning was organic and smooth, but as it went on it started to become continuously rushed. There were characters I didn’t have time to get to know and actually didn’t even end up knowing their names. There’s a point in the film when Judy is welcomed into an isolated society outside of her home, most of which in that society were women. I would’ve liked to get to know them better and see how they influence Judy’s character and revenge on her husband. The film felt very rushed, which is a shame because everything else; acting, production and story were well aligned.

Score: 6/10

22nd July (2018) as seen on Netflix

I remember the 22nd July 2011 as clear as day but for all the wrong reasons. On this day, 77 people in Norway were killed by a terror attack caused by a right wing, anti-immigrant supporter, Andres Brevik, who was a member of a radical organisation and spent nine years preparing his attack on Oslo and Utøya Island. The most shocking part of this massacre was what happened on Utøya Island, which was the main body of Netflix’s film 22nd July. Viljar Hanssen was a teenager attending a political youth camp on Utøya Island in the summer of 2011. Whilst on the island with his younger brother, a bomb went off in the centre of Oslo, outside a government building, killing 8 people. By the time news of the attack got to Utøya Island, its perpetrator had also arrived, and begun gunning down the kids on the island. 69 people were killed, most of which were under 18. Viljar Hanssen was shot five times, in the head, arm, legs and hand. The attack lost him an eye, several fingers and bullet fragments still remain in his brain. He also lost close friends and the ability to perform in many activities he used to do growing up. His ordeal and that of many on the island, is captured in 22nd July, that from beginning to end, approaches this story with sensitivity and facts. Out of the many events I have heard of that include a massacre of some kind, this attack always sticks out in my mind. The perpetrator was truly merciless in his rage against immigrants coming into Norway and he made sure to express that hatred in such a shocking and profound way. The entire story is one that is so hard to believe and is important in preventing future attacks of this kind.

Score: 11/10

Les Misérables (2019) as seen at Curzon Bloomsbury

Les Misérables was nominated for Best Foreign Language film this year at the Oscars and despite it being thrilling and highly well made, I felt quite disappointed by it. The film was accurate in exposing the many communities now prevalent in France today and it was definitely one of those gritty, Cannes worthy films to sink your teeth into. It's not a bad film at all, it's just one I found hard to relate to and therefore I switched off whilst watching it. In fact, I think Portrait of a Lady on Fire was a better contender as Best Foreign Language film at the Oscars and I was left fuming when I found out it hadn’t been nominated in that category. Les Misérables is a film I’d recommend but found it hard to love it overall.

Score: 9/10

A Cure for Wellness (2016) as seen on Netflix

The logline for Shutter Island (2010) is as follows: Teddy Daniels and Chuck Aule, two US marshals, are sent to an asylum on a remote island in order to investigate the disappearance of a patient, where Teddy uncovers a shocking truth about the place. 

And the logline for A Cure for Wellness is as follows: Lockhart, an executive, is sent to a wellness spa in the Swiss Alps to retrieve his company's CEO. At the centre, he encounters strange activities that make him investigate the illness of the people.

Notice anything? They are literally the same film and it's not just the loglines that share an alikeness. On watching A Cure for Wellness, I noticed how similar it was to Shutter Island, from the location, to the colour grading, costumes and even lighting. Both films are almost identical and I pretty much hate both films anyway. I’ll admit, A Cure for Wellness has a better story and tells it better as well, but if it's just a rip off from Shutter Island, is it all that good? I appreciated the production value of this film yet it was hard to tear it away from Shutter Island’s own production. Overall, I found it quiet gimmicky and too close to Shutter Island for it to have much originality.

Score: 6/10

U want me 2 kill him? (2013) as seen on Netflix 

The only thing that let this film down was the acting. There’s something about solely British productions that rub me the wrong way. Admittedly, their structure is always good and the story is well put together, however the artistic side of these films lacks in parts, from acting to set design. U want me 2 kill him? Is based on a true story which really alleviated the film. I thoroughly enjoyed delving into this story and it was an interesting, engaging plot. However, its production value and acting is what let it down.

Score: 7/10

After (2019) as seen on Netflix

So in short, this wasn’t a good film. The twist was satisfying, however the rest of it was just plain annoying. Any film that uses reality tv type music in its montages pisses me off. It's just such a cringey way of showing emotion on screen and I’d much rather they use music with no lyrics or music that actually conveys the emotion of the scene. The relationship between the leads, Hardin and Tessa (Hero Fiennes-Tiffin and Josephine Langford) was very predictable and the conflict between the two only made up like 5% of the film; 2.5% at the beginning and a further 2.5% at the end. For the rest of the 95% of the film, they were pretty much happy throughout, meaning the story had nowhere to go, besides the fact that Tessa’s mom disapproves of Hardin. But besides that and a shocking revelation..that was about it. No one died, no one was really hurt. Hardin was made out to be more troubled than he actually was (his dad is chancellor of a college for fuck’s sake) and I found myself laughing when I shouldn’t be. As for After We Collided, I can’t wait to tear it apart this month.

Score: 4/10

Miss Juneteenth (2020) as seen at BFI Southbank

Miss Juneteenth is the underdog movie of the month for me. You can read a full, in depth review of it right here:

https://ratingtheframe.tumblr.com/post/630357041253400576/she-my-dream-now-miss-juneteenth-review

Score: 11/10

Monsoon (2020) as seen at BFI Southbank 

Why this film was praised by critics is unknown to me. The number one thing that this film did wrong was not showing ANY conflict on screen whatsoever, the characters merily TALKED about conflict. Conflict and actions based on those conflicts is what moves a story forward, and this film was certainly static. The story follows a man (Henry Golding) and his return to Vietnam as he learns about the war and the life he left behind. But the film shows no war, no deprivation or heartache that many vietnamese people had to go through. It's just filled with empty shots of Vietnam and Henry Golding looking out at the city. Why not just make a documentary about The Vietnam War with Henry Golding presenting it, as that is what this film was virtually. You can’t get away with nice looking shots to produce a praise worthy feature. Maybe I’m getting the wrong jist of the film, but in terms of its telling, I didn’t feel anything at all whilst watching it and if I didn’t feel anything, I wasn’t thinking about anything because it was so mundane.

Score: 5/10

The Riot Club (2014) as seen on Amazon Prime 

I’ve had a strong soft spot for Sam Claflin since he played Finnick in The Hunger Games. My crush on him was further confirmed with The Riot Club a British Production based on Laura Wade’s theatre play Posh that shows the ongoings of Oxford’s Riot Club. The group of ten men are all self entitled posh twats who think their education and parent’s money allows them to act in a horrendous way, with their initiation ceremonies and club rules. Sam Claflin plays Ryan, a 1st year student at Oxford and one of the Riot Club’s newest members. Max Irons plays Miles, another new member of the club, who becomes the focal point of Ryan’s jealousy, causing him to do some unspeakable things in one night out of envy for Miles. The ten men in the film work brilliantly as an ensemble, which is unquestionable seeing as five of them went to Guildhall School of Music and Drama, three went to LAMDA, one studied drama at University and the last went to Bristol Old Vic. All the leads in this film are well trained and it's clear to see that in their performances. A really enjoyable, yet eye opening film that exposes the privilege of some living right in the UK, including Boris Johnson and David Cameron, who were former members of this heinous club.

Score: 10/10

Enola Holmes (2020) as seen on Netflix 

Hmmm...there is a great deal of hype going around for this film and with a 92% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, Enola Holmes is well liked. This is understandable, seeing as Fleabag’s director Harry Bradbeer directed this film for Netflix and the cast includes the likes of Millie Bobbie Brown, Henry Cavill and Sam Claflin. I have never seen Millie Bobbie Brown in anything and yet I don’t think she’s doing anything special for me at this moment in time. As a viewer, I am 100% not into actors talking to the camera, a communication technique that I think should stay in theatre. I get this is a big part of Fleabag however I think Enola Holmes could have done without it. Another movie pet peeve is when the opening of a film explains what the film is about directly, something Enola Holmes did in an artistic, yet blatant way. Audiences aren’t dumb and will catch on with given clues, there’s no need to go through a character’s entire history in the opening of a film. For kids aged between 8 and 12, this film is great and Enola Holmes makes a great hero for many young girls. I don’t fall in this age bracket and therefore I enjoyed it a whole lot less.

Score: 6/10

American Murder: Family Next Door (2020) as seen on Netflix

Netflix is known for producing some of the finest, most eye opening documentaries out there. Despite this one being quite simple using found footage, its impact is certainly something that grew organically throughout the documentary. You can read my full review of American Murder: Family Next Door here:

https://ratingtheframe.tumblr.com/post/630780350645354496/netflix-documentary-delves-into-the-murder-of-a

Score: 10/10

Peppermint (2018) as seen on Netflix

I was thoroughly shocked to discover this film was made 2 years ago. You’d think we’re past a time of creating bad films that actually get released, but I guess we’re not. Peppermint was released in the same year as The Favourite, Blackkklansman and A Star is Born, three courageous films, all of which were showered with awards. Peppermint had two major problems; 1) it was boring and 2) the lead wasn’t orchestrated properly. The mexican drug cartel who murder the protagonist’s (Jennifer Garner) husband and child was almost insulting. Because it felt so inauthentic and gimmicky, I didn’t really understand why the drug cartel in the film was even mexican. Peppermint proves that a good story can turn bad in the wrong hands. The script was quite terrible and surrounding that was the nonsensical, half asked directing which saw Jennifer Garner get way too many injuries to still be alive in the end. The whole thing just had my eyes rolling, as nothing about it was original or provoking at all. In fact, the film didn’t even EXPLAIN how Garner’s character became a bloodthirsty vigilante. It merely showed us her training as a cage fighter. Das it. Nothing else in her character made her into this dominant and highly skilled fighter who takes down an ENTIRE DRUG CARTEL ONE HANDED. It, made, no, sense and sits a good example of how NOT to make a film. Also the only reason why it was called Peppermint was because of peppermint ice cream...yeah I don’t get it either.

Score: 2/10

And that is September, which marks an entire year since I’ve been critiquing movies and in that time, I’ve watched well over 350 films. There’s a lot more to come though, for the London Film Festival commences in October and titles such as Dune and the No Time to Die await a winter release. Stay tuned!

[mist-the-wannabe-linguist]

What are some of your favorite things ever? (It can be anything; Food, Feelings, Books and Movies, Characters, Places, etc...)

It’s Big Thought Time

Hmm, food is always tricky so I’ll have to go with multiple, definitely pancakes/blini (equally enjoy making them and eating them), both the regular wider blin and this kind of tiny yeasted blin, both with fruit or generally anything sweet; then chicken schnitzel, svíčková (traditional czech, beef steak with pretty thick sauce made of root vegetables, spices and cream and served with bread dumpling, it sounds fancy but is actually pretty easy to make), tortillas, asian fried noodles, sushi and the like, nothing special

Feelings, hm, you know that feeling when your head is buzzing and your chest almost hurts from excitement about something? The kind of almost a high, when you discuss characters and AUs with friends for hours and hours. The feeling when you’re almost lucid dreaming and in that dream are capable of flight. And the feeling when something you said and did not even think as very funny makes your friend laugh to the point of tears. That’s one of the most special feelings in the world. 

For books, I’m not going to count Frankenstein here, that has long since evolved far beyond being a mere book for me. So as for “normal” books I’d probably select Doctor Sleep by Stephen King and Star Wars Republic Commando series by Karen Traviss, those are the only two that ever made me cry. Also the first two Warrior Cats books, those hold a special place in my heart

Movies, obviously How To Train Your Dragon, Jurassic Park one and three, Disney’s Dinosaur, Dragonheart and Eragon (terrible adaptation of the books but there’s a lot of sentimental value), these were a big part of my childhood and I think shaped a large part of me as a human being, especially HTTYD (that alone would be enough for a whole separate post). Lion King 2, Hunchback of Notre Dame, Treasure Planet and Brother Bear are also movies I’d watch any time. Also Pan’s Labyrinth by Guillermo del Toro is an amazing movie, I adore it, and it’s one of the reasons why I think del Toro would make the best Frankenstein adaptation. Please watch the movie, it’s terrifying, it’s heartbreaking, it’s gorgeous. 

Characters, in no particular order, Varian from Tangled the Series, Danny Torrance from Doctor Sleep (and technically The Shining), Graystripe from the first Warrior Cats arc, Fi from the Republic Commando series, there is definitely more but I can’t think of any more right now. The Frankenstein characters are for me on a fine line between characters and OCs but it’s gotta be Henry, Robert, Victor (not exactly as a person but he’s an incredibly interesting character and, yeah, I feel sorry for the poor bastard) and if headcanons and AUs count then it’s my son, my boy Ernest

Places, during those short three weeks before schools closed and moved to online, my university’s city quickly became my favourite, the dorms, the historical centre where the lecture buildings are located, the architecture, the vibe... I miss it. And I really like the Alps (as may have been clear from my “Henry and mountains discourse” post :D), and in general high elevated places where the view is wide and far and the wind lifts your soul to the sky. Also one particular forest in the Jeseníky mountains, (Czech republic). And anywhere where you can see the sky.

Welp that was a long post, sorry for that lol

And thank you for the ask <3