#obey me mc x mammon

[l3viat8an]

Mammon: Wife?! Why am I the wife???

MC: Because you’re attentive, sweet and you look good in white~

Mammon:*Blushing* M-MC you can’t just say stuff like that….

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

How MC has adjusted to the Devildom XD

Based on this video: I SORT OF LOOK FORWARD TO IT NOW - YouTube

[highwaytcheaven]

[At MC's funeral]

Mammon: Look, can I have a moment with them?

Mammon (to MC): Alright, listen fucker. I know you're not actually dead.

MC: *opens eyes* yEAH NO SHIT

[attic-club-sandwich]

In honor of MC Monday I made some Picrews of my MC, Shae!

Picrews used: (1) (2) (3)

[absolutepokemontrash]

-Gamer Anon-

(Walks in)

For Himiko...

I’LL ORDER IT ALL!

I know this has the same energy of walking into a restaurant and ordering everything but that’s exactly what I want >:3

Damn, okay then-

Himiko

😈: Who is your favourite brother?

Himiko: Oh, that’s easy.

Mammon: Fuck yeah it is!

Himiko: Iiiiiiiiits…

Mammon: Mhm! Mhm!

Himiko: Beel! :D

Mammon: Beel- WAIT BEEL?!

Himiko: What? You don’t think Beel’s great? So mean…

(Her favourite brother is Mammon, she simps for him just as much as he simps for her)

👻: What is your race? Human?

Himiko: Depressingly so. So human and fragile.

Belphie: Fragile my ass, you blasted a chimera five times your size into nothing.

Himiko: So… so fragile…

🔮: Do you possess magic?

Himiko: *bouncing a small fireball between her hands* No.

🖤: Which of the sins do you most align with?

Himiko: I’ve been told it’s pride, but there’s something else… something the brothers don’t fully possess.

(Himiko later becomes the Avatar of Despair, her secondary sin is pride)

🪡: Do you believe in fate?

Answered here

💜: where are you from?

Himiko: I lived in the states for the first few years of my life, but I spent most of my time in Kyoto.

🕷: what’s your biggest fear?

Himiko: …heights.

🐈‍⬛: how long did it take you to adjust?

Himiko: Who said I ever adjusted? Nah, just kidding. In all honesty, pretty quickly. I mean, if I didn’t, I’d be dead so…

👿: who is your least favorite brother?

Himiko: Hate to break it to you, but I don’t have a least favourite brother. And for everyone expecting me to say the “obvious ones”, Lucifer may be a hardass, but he wants what’s best for everyone and really loves us, Belphie may be a brat, but he actually put effort in to be better and unlearn his shitty coping mechanism.

🕸: what is your favorite magical subject?

Himiko: Seductive speechcraft, it’s basically flirting for a grade. Being paired with Mammon is only a bonus.

Mammon: F-for you, maybe…

(Mammon is often too flustered to complete his part of the assignments.)

👾: do you game with Levi?

Himiko: Well, duh, he, Mammon and I game all the time. I’m just… not that good at it.

Leviathan: Her average placing in Devil Kart is 9th lmao

Himiko: Shut up, weeb.

💀: how is your relationship with belphie?

Answered here

🦄: what is your favorite mythical creature?

Himiko: Dragons! They’re so cool! Diavolo and Mammon took me to see a few, once! They asked if I wanted to fly with one, and I… well… had to decline…

🔪: Which brother would you stab?

Himiko: Depends, to be fair I’d stab all of them if given the right context. They’re tough boys, they’d be fine.

(This is a bold faced lie. She refused to stab Luci at the end of season 2)

♋️: what is your zodiac sign?

Himiko: Uhhhh, I think I’m a Capricorn? Born in the year of the rabbit?

🎱: have you gotten detention?

Himiko: Yep, dozens of times.

*Himiko and Mammon high five*

Mammon: Several rules have been added to the list because of us!

Lucifer: That is not something to be proud of.

🦷: What chapter are you on in your studies?

Himiko: Eh? It’s summer break. I’m on a train trip with Mam and Luke right now if you’re wondering.

(I’m on lesson 51)

🎵: what skills do you have?

Himiko: Well, I can sing, play the piano, I like to cook and bake- oh! And how could I forget.

*Himiko opens the door to her room, loud fighting can be heard*

Himiko: SHUT THE FUCK UP DOWN THERE!

*the fighting quiets*

Himiko: I can make rowdy demons calm as capybaras.

🐃: what is your favorite devildom food?

Himiko: Ygh, god, I can’t stand the food here. Shit’s nasty.

Solomon: Miss Himiko here is a picky eater, she won’t eat my food either.

Himiko: I’ll only eat food that I’m sure isn’t poisonous, and considering Lucifer and the others chug cyanide like it’s apple juice, I’ll pass on most of their food.

☂: Do you like the eternal moon?

Himiko: Honestly? Yeah. I was never a big fan of the sun, and the lack of light has done wonders for my sun-sensitive skin.

Asmodeus: We’re both delicate little flowers when exposed to the sun~❤️

🪄: are you friends with solomon?

Himiko: No.

Solomon: We’re the best of friends.

(Their relationship is very… VERY complicated)

🗝: how do you feel about the attic?

Himiko: Well, I mean, at this point it’s just another room in the house.

✝️: Are you religious?

Himiko: Nope. I was raised atheist. But uh…

*Himiko looks around*

Himiko: Guess that was wrong.

🖋: what do you think of diavolo?

Answered here

🔗: What are your kinks?

Himiko: WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT?!

*If you squint, you can see a pair of handcuffs peaking out from a slightly open dresser drawer*

🤍: are you friends with simeon?

Himiko: I mean, yeah, he’s dating my older sister.

(After meeting Himiko’s eldest sister, Hanako, Simeon begins to date her. They’re both teasing bastards ❤️)

♠️: do you gamble like mammon?

Himiko: I’m no addict, but I’ll gamble if I’m in a casino. I don’t do it too much though, someone around here needs to be Mammon’s self control.

Mammon: OI! I don’t need no- oooo, a new casino opened up!

Himiko: …I’ll follow him after the last question.

🟣: will you be sad to leave the devildom?

Himiko: Well, I mean, eh. I’ll miss the brothers, sure, but it isn’t safe for my sisters down here, and I need to be with them too, so. Besides, I can come visit literally any time I want.

🦴: would you make a deal to come back?

Himiko: Pfff, why would I do that if I can just tell Solomon or Barbatos to open a portal so I can go visit?

*Himiko stands up at claps her hands*

Himiko: As wonderfully invasive this has been, dear little question askers, I need to go make sure Mammon doesn’t bet our honeymoon fund on the ponies. Later!

***********

PHEW! That was fun!

[zephyrchama]

Falling asleep in one of the House of Lamentation's common rooms can be a gamble. At best, somebody kindly carries you back to your room and tucks you in. Or maybe they leave you where you were, but drape a jacket or blanket over you.

Sometimes they go overboard, and you wake up with too many blankets. It's sweltering hot and excessively heavy. You thought the brothers were just being supportive in a weird way until Mammon accidentally revealed everyone is trying to break the record of 23 blankets and three duvets.

Sometimes you wake up with a full manicure and facial in progress. Asmo likes the practice.

Sometimes you wake up wearing Lucifer's reading glasses or Mammon's sunglasses. The Anti-Lucifer League must have thought you make a good hiding spot.

Sometimes you wake up with fresh food next to you. Particularly if you fell asleep near mealtime. The strong smell of Devildom cuisine rouses you awake, and you catch Beel trying to tip-toe away.

Sometimes you find... offerings. Bottled tea, or sticker sheets, or a coin placed on your cheek. Levi started taking pictures and in thanks decided to make a shrine dedicated to his idol (you).

Sometimes they draw on your face. The first person to do so will leave a marker for anyone else who happens to feel creative. You've woken up with whiskers, a mustache, fake eyes drawn over your eyelids, money signs drawn on your eyelids, swirls and hearts, a goatee, a big unibrow, and you're pretty sure the twins are the culprits behind a game of tic-tac-toe.

Sometimes you get notes. Simple reminders, or a notice that Lucifer's left the house so please make sure to check that everyone's behaving when you wake up. Occasionally you wake up completely covered in post-its with silly messages.

Sometimes you get kisses. They leave no trace, unless their sender gets carried away and sticks around.

[lovetei]

Things that the citizens of the Devildom witnessed that will prove that this Human have the characters at their beck and call

Versions: The Brothers, Side characters

Warnings: Gender neutral pronouns for MC, Cussing, Slight yandere themes (Belphegor, Asmodeus)

Links: Masterlist

--------------------------------------------------

LUCIFER

This demon likes sticking to rules

Running on hallways? Detention

Eating during class? Detention

Not paying attention to class? Detention

No one is safe...

Except for one person.

The cafeteria if filled with loud noises, your voice shouting profanities to another demon specifically.

Everyone listening to the argument feels like they're stomach is about to burst out of nervousness because "What if Lucifer randomly comes in and put all of us is detention because we just stood by and didn't do anything to stop the fight?!"

And he did.

But what surprised them is that he didn't shout or anything, he just stood there for a few second and scanned the crowd looking for one of his brothers.

Spotted Mammon and came close to him before whispering something among themselves.

And then he just stood there

Doing nothing

As if it's just fucking okay to let a human, the exchange student at that, to scream and curse a demon because he won't cooperate into this project.

And when the demon started cursing back at you, the rules are suddenly so strict as if cussing will cause the end of the 8 rings of hell.

The demon is sent to detention, removed from the group, suspended, and many more.

And who knows? Maybe you pulled just a few strings to have that demon expelled.

But what the citizens sure know is that they never saw anyone again after talking to MC like that.

MAMMON

It was cute

Mammon would do anything for you, no matter how big or small it is.

One day, Mammon was spotted running around the halls of RAD.

Looking like he's getting chased by Lucifer, again.

But surprisingly, he's not.

He's just running around the school fetching your fan, notebooks, bag, pens, water or some snacks.

One time, you two were put in a group for this project and were talking about it with your other group mates.

Then you hit him with a "Mammon, I left my notebook on my desk in the potions class, can you fetch it for me?"

With just a blink of an eye, Mammon who was leaning on your shoulder just a few minutes ago is gone.

And with another blink of an eye he's there again with your notebook on his hands then he's back to leaning on your shoulder again as if he didn't just go to the other side of the school for a notebook.

LEVIATHAN

He's introverted

He won't go out his room if it's just for some lame party

I also headcanons for him to be the most unseen brother

Or like him having the smallest amount of photo and information online because he just won't go out.

Yeah, he won't go out if it's just some small, lame party but if Diavolo hosts it, what exactly can he do?

"Do you think the avatar of envy will attend this party?"

"Ha! No way... Lord Leviathan won't attend small parties or gatherings like these unless Lord Diavolo hosts it himself."

"Lord Leviathan really has a high standard when it comes to gatherings..."

And then poof

He's there

Beside you

A happy go lucky sheep beside a gloomy snake

What a match

And if you ask him why he would attend such gatherings when it's totally not even his style he would just go like "MC."

"What can I do? MC really wants to see the fireworks display."

"MC wants me to escort them."

So they got the hint on how to make Levi attend gatherings, either have Diavolo host it or invite MC too.

SATAN

He's angry

But not angry enough to yell when MC is around

Man's can go from 👹 to ☺️ real quick as soon as he felt MC's prescense

He doesn't know why too, but whenever he yell while you're around he thinks he'll fall out of favor

"WELL MAYBE IF YOU'RE SO PERFECT THEN WHY DON'T YOU GO AROUND WHILE YOU HAVE YOUR HEAD FAR UP YOUR ASS- Oh, Hi MC? How are you?"

He'll talk so sweet in front you and then when you turn around you can see some veins popping out of his neck and forehead.

And if he can't really handle it and went berserk in your prescense another scary yet amazing thing you can is to put your hand on his body.

Shoulder, head, neck, wrist, arm, wherever it is.

Just pat him or link your arms with him and he will start to calm down.

ASMODEUS

People headcanon him to like it when you're obsessed with him but I think he's more obsessed to you.

Like he's down bad

You can do anything and he'll literally fawn all over it

"Look at the way they run their hands through their hair!"

"Look at how they work!"

"The way they hold that fork is so graceful~"

Literally, you're the only person that comes to his mind when someone said pretty

Except for himself of course

But I swear, whenever someone caught him staring at you the atmosphere gets so thick

You don't even know why but the atmosphere is heavy and the air suddenly smells so sweet

And those heart in his eyes, the way his pupils dilate

Yeah, you have this man worshipping you alongside himself

BEELZEBUB

Other than the fact that he's actually willing to share his food with you

He's willing to help you in any physical works

Like lifting up things, carrying your stuffs and sometimes even running errands for you

I mean, he actually doesn't do it a lot because Lucifer actually asks Mammon for this stuff because the things Lucifer needs to be done is a little...

Shady?

And he doesn't want to taint Beel's innocence.

So now since you're already a part of the student council when Lucifer needs to have something important finished but it requires physical work.

You and Beel will be partnered

And he doesn't have anything against it either

He likes it so much when you command him to do something actually

I mean, he's tall and buff but Lucifer won't ask him to do anything that includes hard labor except taking care of Belphegor

So you actually helping him make use of all those muscles made him feel a tinge of happiness

He feels like he's actually of use :)

BELPHEGOR

This little brat

He would kill for you and he means it

He's not scared to spill blood on broad daylight as long as it's for you

Someone bothered you? Dead

Oh this person annoyed you? Taken care of

Aw~ He told you you're cute and asked you out on a date? That's sweet! Dead.

He's just like that

He won't tolerate anyone who dared disrespect you

And Lucifer won't even put a stop into this

"I mean, Devildom is quite overpopulated and we don't want anyone disrespecting Lord Diavolo's plan on bringing the three realms together now." Is what he reasons everytime.

Oh, he also wakes up on command as long as it's you.

Lucifer and his brothers could be shaking him like he's dead and he won't even bother to open his eyes

But if you just pulled a "Belphie? Good morning..." Oh dear, he's wide awake and clinging to you.

[kpop-otome-yandere-here]

Mc: Hey, dumb slut, get over here.

Mammon, sighing: Okay-

Asmo: I'm coming!

Mammon, confused: I thought... I was dumb slut...

[leonideez]

After the initial shock and sadness of the brothers realizing that MC will die one day; I think i’d be funny if MC jokes about and and uses it as leverage occasionally.

Lucifer: MC your grades are horrible you need to work on the assignments that have been given to you

MC: i’m going to die one day and you’re going to be sad about all of the times i could have been happy and yet you made me do schoolwork instead

Like MC being an absolute menace would be so fucking funny to me

[catmadeofsalad]

Asmodeus: *playing with MC'S hair*

Beelzebub: *holding MC*

Belphie: *sleeping on top of MC's legs*

Mammon: *buying MC more blankets for their pile*

Leviathan: *putting in a funny movie for MC*

Lucifer: Why are you crowding MC so much?

Asmodeus: Their toxic ex tried to manipulate them into getting back together, and our dear human started to panic so we deemed this a necessary solution.

Lucifer: Then where is Satan?

Mammon: *grins* Hunting

[meowsgirldrawing]

Many Kisses~ (PolyAU! Obey me!)

Note: I got no excuse for the last one, the demons just love their human too much <3 (And MC is just loving life)

[koolades-world]

Exclusive Mc Privileges

Lucifer

Getting to wear his big coats and gloves when you’re cold or whenever you feel like it

Interrupting him working with no consequences no matter how silly the reason

Waking him up first thing in the morning like a kid on Christmas

Telling him how attractive he is when he’s mad

Helping him grooms his wings

Taking as many silly pictures together as they want as long as they don’t share them with anyone

Borrowing his pens

Helping yourself to his record collection

Staying out late

Comforting him in the middle of the night when he wakes up with a nightmare

Mammon

Being his passenger princess

Treating him like a princess whenever he feels inadequate

Borrowing his sunglasses at any time

Keeping him company when Lucifer hangs him upside down

Taking the blame for anything bad you did even if it means losing money

Driving his car

Using his money

Calling him you first and cutest demon

Dressing in matching outfits even if they are bright pink

Levi

Joining him to any and all conventions

Making cosplays with him

Borrowing anything from his manga collection

Touching or seeing his tail in a domestic setting since he’s insecure about

Polishing his scales for him before parties!

Feeding him while he’s gaming

Letting you play any game you want on game nights together

Doing his makeup whenever you feel like it

Caring for Henry

Satan

Organizing his books

Sharing his tea collection with him

Baking cookies together from his favorite book series

Going to exclusive events as his partner

Using his influence to get you whatever you want

Spending late night reading time with him

Going on morning walks with him

Scrubbing his hair in the shower <3

Borrowing his notes from class if you were sick or just forgot to take some that day

Asmo

Sharing his morning routine with him since he wants you to look fabulous too

Getting lots of gifts from him since everything he sees reminds him of you

Borrowing anything you want in his closet

Using his Devilgram

Matching jewelry!

Making jewelry together to have it matching which is better than buying it

Attending meet and greet events with him as moral and emotional support

Him cooking cute recipes he found online for you

Being his personal model for new looks

Beel

Cooking for and with him

Stopping him from eating the ingredients while cooking

Picking out his change of clothes after the gym

Going on dates to new restaurants

Stealing his shirts to fashion into outfits or lounging around in

Piggy back rides!

Flexing his arms for you so you can touch them

Admiring his wings

Teaching you everything he knows about various Devildom dishes

Belphie

Sleepy kisses :)

Hiding in the attic to get away for a while and nap

Pillow shopping together

Going camping in the middle of nowhere to admire the stars and each others company

Sneaking off together at parties

Karaoke together since he knows how much you love his voice

Attempting to wake each other up but falling back asleep together each time

Surprising you at RAD with random gifts of flowers

Making cupcakes together and ending in a flour war

[the-great-chimera]

Mammons most recently googled questions:

- do humans like to be pet?

- How much grimm does a human make throughout their life cycle?

- how to cut out human meat from my diet.

- is it okay for a human to ingest a small amount of human meat?

- how to not leave finger prints???

- top Ways to get rich quick

- gold bag

- demon scale gold bag

- viciousace golden dragon skin bag ( 42,000 raven)

- human intelligence quiz

- what to do when your human has now developed a taste for human flesh.

- what does outer space taste like

- what to do if your human has started trying to size you up to eat you?

- what is bone apple teeth???

- sharkcoochi board???

- sharkcochi baord??

- how to spell shark coochi bord??

- charcuterie board.

- shark shaped charcuterie board.

- how to tell if your human has rabbies

- what does a rabbies bite look liek???

[daytaker]

The Gang React to You Falling Asleep on Them

Lucifer

*deep sigh that speaks volumes to how difficult it is for this man to get any sleep, and here you are, conked out on his shoulder...*

If you don't wake up within a few minutes, he'll have no choice but to move. He is not the sort to be so sentimental that he can't bear the thought of disturbing your precious sleeping face. Of course, he won't be an asshole about it; he'll be careful and try not to wake you up. He might even drape his jacket over you for your nap.

But only if he doesn't need it.

Mammon

"Hey, my arm's gettin' a little stiff, can I just-- ...ah."

Oh. Ah. Alright. Cool. This is happening. Hmm. Damn. Not super comfortable, and it's kinda inconvenient to be trapped here, but, pshh, what's he supposed to do, wake up a sleeping human? He's heard that can lead to...cardiac arrest, or something. He ain't gonna murder you just to move a little sooner.

You did not just start snuggling him in your sleep. Did Mammon score today or did he score today? Too bad his arm's starting to fall asleep, but, well, nothin' in life is free.

Leviathan

"What...? WHAAAAAAT?" (But only in his brain. He doesn't want to wake you up. Mammon says that can lead to cardiac arrest in humans.)

He's pretty sure he's the one who's going to keel over from heart problems at this rate. He hadn't even realized you were getting sleepy. Are you bored watching him tackle this single-player old school RPG? Did you hate it all this time and you never even mentioned it?! Why is your face so close?! Do you not have any idea the kind of mental torture you're putting him through right now?!

Deep breaths, Levi. Deep breaths. This happens in anime all the time. It's...usually a good thing! It means that the main character and their love interest are tripping all the right flags, and... and how long is this scene going to last? Those scenes almost always end with the two still on the couch, then they skip to the next day or something. How long is he going to have to just sit here... suffering...?

After about ten minutes, he's reached his limit and he gently shakes you awake. He is so embarrassed that he insists you go to bed now, and he will not take no for an answer. Good night. Goodbye. *door slams*

AAAAHHHHHHHHH.

Satan

"Hm? Have you been getting enough sleep...?"

Satan would be very pleased with the situation, though probably less intensely excited than Mammon. He'll make whatever small adjustment is necessary for his comfort, then settle in and read for as long as it takes you to wake up. He feels very warm and fuzzy. It's nice. Hopefully you do this more often. But he should really ask you about your sleep schedule. Levi must be forcing you to stay awake too often.

Asmodeus

"Aww, aren't you adorable?"

This is precious. He needs to document it. As soon as he realizes what's happening, he'll carefully pull out his D.D.D., making sure not to wake you up, and start snapping pics. A few of you, a few dozen selfies with you, a few with him pretending to be asleep too, and then a perfect shot of him kissing your forehead. Grammable as fuck.

Er... is that drool he can see in one of those photos? ...You're going to have to wake up. You can't just drool on his brand-name jacket.

Beelzebub

"Oh."

He's used to people falling asleep on him, so this doesn't really throw him for much of a loop. However, he's a bit more careful of waking you up. He knows that if he wakes Belphie, he'll just fall back asleep within a few seconds, but you're not quite so adaptable. So he'll do his best to stay quiet and not move much.

But no matter how hard he tries, he's never going to be able to turn off his stomach. You'll probably wake up with a start as his stomach roars at you about twenty inches from your face.

Belphegor

"...zzzz..."

Who are we kidding, we all know he was asleep first. Probably, he's the reason you fell asleep so easily. He's soft and warm, perfect for drifting off to dreamland...

Diavolo

"Very bold! You really are astonishingly brave."

It's not every day someone has the stones to fall asleep in his presence, let alone fall asleep and use him as some sort of glorified pillow. What a nice change of pace.

He'll continue doing whatever it is he was doing before, but he is a busy demon, running the Devildom and all. He'll slowly and carefully extricate himself when it's time to move, then have Barbatos bring you a blanket and prepare some tea for when you wake up.

Barbatos

"Humans are awfully needy creatures, aren't they."

He can't help but chuckle. You just pass out during the middle of the day? Then again, it's possible you're probably not entirely well. He'll have to disturb the young master to ask what sort of accommodations to make for you. Of course, he's sure Diavolo won't mind. But it's irresponsible to let yourself drift off like this in the castle of the king of the demons, isn't it? This isn't a resort.

Sleep well, human.

Solomon

"You're just looking cute on purpose now, aren't you?"

Oh well! Looks like he's stuck here for now. Too bad. He'll smile, put an arm around you, kick his feet up, and settle in for the long haul. Hopefully you're able to get a good, solid nap in.

Most likely, you both will. He'll pass out too within ten minutes, give or take.

Simeon

"Oh- shh. There, there."

Well, if you aren't adorable... You must be so tired. He's glad you feel so at ease with him that you let yourself fall asleep, and you certainly look cute, but he's also a little concerned that you're this tired. He'll patiently wait for you to wake up. Then he'll make you some tea and gently remind you to take better care of your health.

Luke

"Eh...?! Hey! ...WAKE UP!"

How tired are you?! You need to get better sleep! Sheesh, you need to be more careful too. You almost crushed him.

[mammonsrockstargf]

It starts small. You honestly don't think much of it. Crows begin leaving you gifts in your window frame. It's pretty rocks. It's a small screw. It's coins and grimm, it's a button from a shirt, it's shiny beads.

You bring it up to Mammon randomly one day. He stares at you wide-eyed. "What, you mean crowns leave ya gifts? Sound ridiculous," he says and you shrug.

"I mean, I've heard about crows leaving gifts for humans before. It's not that unusual, but usually, the humans give something to the crows in return," you say, thinking aloud. "That's the part that confuses me. I haven't given anything to the crows, so why do they like me so much?" Mammon's cheeks are bright red by now, the blush going all the way down his neck. Your brows furrow with concern.

"Hey, are you okay?" you ask and he nods quickly. "Yeah, 'm fine, gotta-go-see-ya! " he stutters and quickly leaves you, practically running away. You look after him in confusion. Weren't you both just supposed to be headed home?

The gifts continue. You get a single earring. At one point you get a small bone and at another time you get a tooth which leaves you a bit unsettled but also intrigued. You treasure every single gift, keeping it in a small box by your desk. You begin to leave the crows gifts in return. You find that they like peanuts and berries. One time you experimentally leave a big piece of watermelon, only to find it devoured within minutes.

The next day there's a pretty locket with what looks like a flower engraved in it. You gape at the locket and instantly put it on, proudly wearing it around your neck. You make sure to leave the crows a feast that day.

Satan is the first brother to notice it when it slips out from the collar of your uniform one day. "Is that new?" he asks. "Oh yeah, I've befriended a bunch of crows." Satan stops in his tracks and stares at you.

"You've befriended crows?" He repeats and you nod. "Yes. Why is everyone so weird about this?" A knowing smile creeps onto his face and he shakes his head.

"Why do you think the crows like you so much?" he asks. You hum, considering it for a second. Eventually, you have to draw a blank and look at Satan in defeat. His smile only grows wider.

"Ask Mammon. He might know."

You find Mammon in his room, lying in his bed. He smiles when he sees you and pats the bed, motioning you to come over. "Come here," he says and you do, lying down next to him. He huffs and pulls at you so you're lying on his chest. You can feel his heart beating and you look up at him through your lashes.

"Hey, Mamms," you say and he runs his hand down your back, rubbing circles into it. "Hey, treasure," he says and grins.

"Satan says you might know the cause of my new friendships." His cheeks turn crimson in an instant and he lets out something akin to a nervous laugh. "Oh, the crows, you mean?" you huff and playfully roll your eyes. "Come on, big guy, spill the beans," you say and Mammon sighs.

"So, the crows like you, because, well, I told them about you," he says and a grin spreads across your face. "Go on," you say.

"Okay, I have crow familiars, you know what a familiar is, right?" he says and looks at you expectantly. You rake your brain, remembering briefly having about it in one of your classes. "Yeah, it's like witches with black cats, right?" you say and Mammon hums.

"Yeah, kind of, but anyone can have a familiar and it can be any animal. The whole black cat thing is just something the catholic church made up." You nod in understanding while Mammon continues to rub patterns into your back. The beating of his heart seems to have become louder underneath you. "So what you're saying is you can't shut up about how awesome I am and now a bunch of crows are obsessed with me?" you say and Mammon hides his face in his hands. You giggle and pry his hands away, smiling at him adoringly.

"Please don't make fun of me," he huffs and you pout at his antics. "I could never tease my lovely little bird boy," you coo and Mammon groans while pushing you off him. He turns his back to you and you laugh manically. "Come on, Mamms, It's cute," you say and press soft kisses to the nape of his neck. "you're cute," you say and throw an arm and a leg over him, attempting to spoon him. You feel him instantly melting to your touch, completely unable to keep his resolve. It's almost too easy when he turns around again to face you. You smile at his pink face.

"I really like the gifts the crows gave me," you reassure him because you genuinely do. It's become something you look forward to when you open your window.

"You do?"

"Yeah, absolutely," you affirm and he smiles sheepishly. "I once tried to train them to steal money for me, but it didn't work."

a/n: thanks for reading! find my other stuff here <3

[slutifer]

Lucifer: mc, you can’t just say “spit in my mouth” when one of us does something you deem attractive

mc: but why not??

Mammon: yeah it’s just saliva, what’s the problem??

Satan: did you know that saliva is almost entirely water? only 0.5 percent of it is anything else, but that tiny portion is full of useful enzymes-proteins that speed up chemical reactions-

Lucifer: stop-

Satan: among these are amylase and ptyalin, which begin to break down sugars in carbohydrates while they are still in our mouths. if we chew a starchy food like bread or potato for a bit longer than normal, we will soon notice a sweetness. unfortunately, bacteria in our mouths like that sweetness, too-

Lucifer: STOP-

Satan: they devour the liberated sugars and excrete acids, which drill through human teeth and give them cavities. other enzymes, notably lysozyme-which was discovered by human scientist alexander fleming before he stumbled onto penicillin-attack many invading pathogens, but not the ones that cause tooth decay, alas.

Satan: …

Lucifer: …

mc: …

mc: spit in my mouth

Lucifer: MC