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#ok they dont have THAT much in common
c4n1d43cup1d · 11 months
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how have i never seen anyone compare these 2
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maggotmoment · 3 months
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transfem vyncent save me. save me transfem vyncent save me
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deoidesign · 4 months
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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mellotronmkll · 1 month
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I need to stop having one weird reaction with someone and then letting the anxiety decide in my head that the friendship is doomed because I ruined it like it's my absolute worst trait and I just have to move past it but it's hard
#i have to operate under the assumption that if people have an issue they will tell me but unfortunately this isnt true .#and it has happened to me in the past that i thought everything was ok because people were giving signals i wasnt picking up on#due to the autism so now im paranoid and constantly looking for signs i did something wrong and people are mad#and then i find them where they arent there which perversely does more to ruin a friendship than almost anything else#like the constant Are you mad at me... so i try to force myself not to do that and just#try to again assume that people arent however. im so worried about being blindsided Also of course i naturally dont want to make people#upset so if i am doing something wrong i want to change my behavior. however the fact its nuanced like#where you have to only do that a little bit and then take people at their word most of the time#fucking sucks like you actually are required in relationships to read peoples unspoken signals but you cant do that Too much#and if you misinterpet them its bad... but you cant ask for feedback too much because thats bad too. IT DOES MY HEAD IN actually like#it makes it so hard for me to interact with people because im just worried All of the time . and i have to be constantly like#ok check the facts and adjust behavior. check the facts and adjust behavior. make sure the facts are facts and not jumping to conclusions.#ok how do i do that . ok when do i ask directly. also people dont always tell the truth when you Do ask directly .#and then this is why my whole life i have mostly kept to myself and im trying to stop doing that but its hard because talking to others is a#puzzle for me that stresses me out more than anything else. man this sucksssssss can i just BE NORMAL!!!!!!#i know like Everyone has this problem its a common issue with relationships Communication but it feels especislly difficult for me .i#like cant fathom how other people manage very large numbers of friendships like even being able to count my close friends#on one hand i feel like im barely managing everything and im letting everyone down constantly but again i think thatsnonly my perception/#worry and not even true. god
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jrueships · 2 months
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anybody else have a food they're allergic to but still eat anyway
#not DEATH deathly but like. allergic#im allergic to shrimp and guac but i still eat it ..#my throat will get itchy and swell and breathing feels more closed#wherever the food touches also swells in bumps but usually only wherever the food makes contact#but yall. it's so good#the food not the swelling lol i have to sip on water while i eat to help gauge the significance of the throat swelling#i can usually eat up to 2 or 3 big shrimps until i hit my ok.. one more and this will hurt me lots#ill probably still be able to breathe but like it'll be an even bigger struggle than it is now#i think im also allergic to this common italian herb thingy anise? but thats fine bcs i dont like it anyways#but grilled SEASONED shrimp is my weakness. i LOVE SHRIMP!!! add some buffalo sauce and my my my..#idk tho my friends hate when i eat shrimp and will moderate my moderation#'ted ure a medical man. u should be against this' i hungry#idk maybe i dhould cold cut endulging in my allergies now b4 it becomes a lifestyle#i remember when i was younger my boss order me chinese food for doing a Lot of open2closes#and i ordered shrimp and lo mein(iLOVEEEE LO MEINN!!! when i was lil i would get PLATEFULS of JUST lo mein)#(id remove the veggies bcs they got in the way of my noodles)#(but now im older and the texture is too much sameness so i get even amount of lo mein and some sorta meat for Balance)#and i ate like a bit then put the rest in the cooler and he was like 'ure not hungry?' and i told him im allergic#and his eyes got real big and he was shouted my full name like a worried parent#i mean i explained my eat 2 then wait for the swelling to die down and eat 2 more till the inability to breathe gets annoying#but he was still anxious and watching me like a hawk#so#maybe.. i shouldnt do this anymore#does anyone else do this if they have the ability to?#perhaps i am dancing with the devil here#the devil wears privilege
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sonknuxadow · 7 months
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all the comments implying that these comics originally came with stickers and posters and temporary tattoos and stuff and also the people being given other prizes like pins for having their letters published makes me wonder how much of all that merch is still out there somewhere ...
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memorys-skyscraper · 1 year
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its so fucking funny to me that of all the people who have had the opportunity to bag zero, the probably several-hundred-year-old she/they reaper from the literal fucking void, all signs are currently pointing to jullus, probably the most normal, pedestrian dude that the scions interact with
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chialattea · 4 months
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What will win:
my desire to write DA fics
vs
my seething hatred for medieval stereotypes (“haha they thought bathing was bad!!” “haha their streets were filthy and they threw wastewater out of their windows”)
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bangcakes · 10 months
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nomairuins · 2 months
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i am the talker. sorry. during movies and tv shows (not in a theater unless its empty in which case SORRY!) BUT I LOVE TO DISCUSS WHATNIM WATCHING I LOVE TO ASK QUESTIONS I KNOW THE MOVIE WILL ANSWRR I LOVE TO whats the word. like spectate but for ... its like prediction but its. like spectate .. but prediction. like when youre like Thinking about something and. theorize i guess? i feel it starts with an s. anyways i love to do whatever that shit is SPECULATE. SPECULATE I LOVE TO SPECULATE WHILE WATCHING!!! SRY!! I LOVETO MAKE JOKES AND LAUGH lock me up nd such.
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dullahandyke · 3 months
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Whenver I see that post abt a Twitter user completing Keith Haring's unfinished painting with AI and getting replies like 'NO this is BAD ❌🙅‍♂️🔥 the original meaning of the painting wasssss' I'm always a little baffled that rarely do people reblog a version clarifying that the tweet is like. Satire and/or bait
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perilegs · 5 months
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i pass pretty much all the time but hm. ive heard interesting stuff from drunk ppl i know who dont know im trans
#''haha when my bf was talking about you and i asked to see a picture he showed me one and i was like... is that right? bc i thought that was#a girl in that pic. i mean only bc i didnt expect him to have any girlypop friends haha''#yeah i mean that is an average thing to say and not mean or anything but it hits a bit different when im trans#i mean the person saying that didnt know and if they did they would have never said anything like that#but it's still a bit. hmmm.#also the topic of my looks came up and it's funny how everyone thinks i'm cute#i wish i could b masc hot but im fine with being cute. not everyone can look good the same way#but like it's so common for the only compliment transmascs get being ''cute'' for various reasons but i think in my case it's just my#wavy hair and slight babyface and round features#which yeah ok whatever i'm still young - ive got plenty of time to start looking less like a boy and more like a man#as in even if i was a cis guy id look pretty much like this#though! im only 2 years on t so i cant wait what the future holds for how i'll look :3c#well almost 2 and a hlaf but yknow#also i have a slight. can i say this. ''tranny voice'' which. slay. but i was told i ''sound like a femboy'' which#once again super funny that ppl say that stuff bc they genuinely cant tell im trans#the only reason i pass is bc i get read as [justin mcelroy voice] kinda faggy#oh that guy over there with wide hips and feminine manners and voice and small feet and hands [compared to cis men] with an apparently cute#face who doesnt seem to know anything about stereotypical guy stuff? thats a cis man#and i love that#but also one of these ppl is not cis#if you saw me irl you'd know im insanely easy to clock for trans people#but yeah whatever im just amused by all this it's kind of fun having ppl not know im trans#but also i have a new friend who doesnt know and i think i should let him know at some point if it comes up bc idk man. it feels like im#living a secret life or something. like obviously no one has the right to know im trans but. i can make the choice of wanting someone toknow#but also hes my only guy friend who lives in this city. well technically not the only one i have another friend but we never hang out irl.#anyways i dont want to ruin our broship#i dont think itd get ruined and if it did itd just mean whatever but im still scared#agh idk#leevi talks
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My mom just sent a message to the family group chat suggesting that my siblings download the 'For the Strength of Youth' magazine on their Gospel Library app and talked about how much the youth magazines helped her testimony growing up and like, cool. Fine. Don't know why the 'sending random spiritual thoughts in the gc' thing started out of nowhere when it hadn't been a thing for a decade but this is just another one of those, and you're ofc allowed to talk about things that are significant in your life.
I don't think sending the 'What I Did When Someone Close to Me Challenged My Faith' article right afterwards was strictly necessary though 🙃
#hi bg mutuals 👋 i'm gonna vent about this from time to time. if any mutuals dont want to see it block the 'apostake' tag#trying not to read too much into it b/c I think I did last time something like this happened#and i dont want to make an ass of myself even if neither time would actually be in front of my parents#but like...i know that they know that one of my sisters is clearly PIMO#they went through her phone a couple weeks ago and i have no idea if they read my texts w/ her#but if they did they probably saw the conversation i had with her about some of the really common shelf-breakers#and telling her to take looking into it at her own pace b/c it's scary and overwhelming#(a conversation SHE started btw)#and when i talked to my parents about the larger context of that whole situation i talked about not having space to step back#and their response was that they give plenty of space b/c they dont make her go to seminary???#that's not the same thing as letting her openly question & potentially leave the church idk what to tell you#like. besties i dont know for sure what caused it (which is NOT making things better. it just feels potentially passive aggressive)#but from my end? it sure looks like it might be a reaction to that. probably not JUST that (friends exist) but.#if you think I'm whispering anti-mormon rhetoric into my siblings' ears just ask me. i'm very much NOT doing that#i'm just. talking? to them? when and if they come to me with questions?#and not making my answer 'well there's a reason our parents raised us in the church! ☺️'#(an actual argument given in the article my mom sent)#hate it. thanks#apostake#jay rambles#ok to interact#im not challenging anyone's faith. my patience though? INCREDIBLY challenged#gotta figure out how to work my way around a 'hey please dont send spiritual thoughts to the gc *I'm in*' talk tactfully#they've been pretty chill about me leaving over-all?? at least to my face#haven't pushed me to go to church w/ them; was fine with me not visiting for easter; didnt try to convince me to not drink coffee; etc#it's just. frustrating that they're not giving my siblings that still live with them that same grace#my sister's 17 ffs#it's very possible im way overreacting to the article. but what is tumblr for if not screaming into the void#religion#mormonism
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sanstropfremir · 2 years
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I'm really enjoying reading through your blog, and of course it has to do a lot with the fact that I also love to bits everything Taemin puts out. Unfortunately tumblr makes it really annoying to try and get to older posts, so sorry if you've already spoken about any of this T-T
A big part of why I love Taemin's solo work so much is his unique style, which shines through both technique and performance.
Taemin has many times spoke about how he's heavily involved in everything concerning his work: styling, picking out the samples, lyrics, themes, choreo, you name it he took care of it at some point. "The taemin genre" couldn't have emerged simply out of him being an above average dancer, his signature is on everything.
But surely, very often he can't do much more than express his opinion on something, and a lot of the end product is still created by other people? It would be silly to expect him to dance, sing, produce, write lyrics, style all at once, right? Or would it?
I very, very often hear people take pride in the fact that their fav is an "all-rounder", that presumably does most of the "creating" purely by themselves, or at least can shine all alone, even without the support of a group. But does that imply that artists that only do the performing part are somehow less "authentic", or worthy of praise? Or that idols comfortable in their position as a team player aren't talented or into what they do? To call yourself a master you probably have to spend a decade on just one skill, so why expect teens and young adults to be Da Vincis?
Now, of course it's still amazing when an idol puts in the work and branches out. Taemin's vocal improvement undoubtedly gave him more creative opportunities and made his stages that much more impactful.
But even just being an idol and maintaining an attractive appearance (for criteria as harsh as it is in k-pop) would easily count as a full-time job, so I would go as far as to say that this expectation of total creative control is a little delusional.
haha it was really funny watching you go through everything! yea tumblr is really bad about that, but if you go to my blog on desktop/not the mobile version you should be able to page back through ALL my asks, which are all tagged by 'answers'. there are like probably around a thousand of those now tho.
i have kind of talked about this before, but i'm very happy to talk about it again, because i always think it's worthwhile to clarify what the actual process is like for creating a collaborative work.
you are right, taemin and every other idol who says they're 'involved' in the process in some way is most likely just picking options and expression opinions about things that designers and stylists have already curated for them. it is physically impossible for a single person to do EVERYTHING involved in something like creating a kpop cb, because there are just too many tasks. and if one person DID try to do it all on their own, it would take probably 100x as long to finish. let me use styling as an example: lots of idols have professed to have input on styling choices, but this can range anywhere from bringing in moodboards and having discussions about what styling they're interested in at design meetings, to just picking which thing they like best from a selection of clothes already provided by the designer. in NO fucking world is an idol:
taking measurements
shopping for fabric
shopping for clothing
sewing and altering clothing
doing the budgeting
labelling and collating all the pieces together
taking fitting notes
these are all extremely specialized skills that 1) take TIME to learn how to do and how to do well, and 2) just take TIME to DO. you want to know what i spend probably 40% of the total production time of a show doing when i costume design? fucking SHOPPING. an idol may contribute ideas to a design and make executive choices, but in NO way are they solely responsible for everything about styling. the only idol that i would believe to have a heavier hand than most in this regard is kibum, who does actually have a good knowledge of fashion and fabric and i could see him going shopping with a designer. but if you think that man is sewing anything? cmon.
and this is just for ONE aspect of a cb. you think an idol is also painting the set? shopping for props? setting up the lighting? most idols that are known for dancing aren't even choreographing their own work, INCLUDING taemin. it is absolutely and unquestionably delusional to say that an idol has total creative control over something. this whole idea doesn't originate in kpop (it's auteur theory's fault), but kpop does suffer from an acute version of it, because there's a general collective concensus that devalues the creative work of the labourer. basically, people will only classify you as a "true artist" if you're the one who comes up with the ideas, because ideas and concepts are given more importance and weight. it's a type of because 'being in charge'/'at the top of the food chain that's been perpetuated by capitalism and western postmordern art theory that intentionally places value of conceptual skills higher than those of craftspeople. no type of person is a ''true artist'' and most art takes many people with many different skills in order to create. i find it unintentionally very funny that you use da vinci as an example of an 'allrounder' (or 'renaissance man' as they used to be called) because he, like every other famous painter from the era, used apprentices to help paint his paintings!!!!! he was even an apprentice himself for verrocchio!! da vinci's legacy would not have been possible without all the other people who helped him create the work that he did!
what is the real kicker about this whole mess is that downplays the beauty of the fact that art is made collaboratively. an 'ideas' person cannot realize those ideas without a craftsperson there to help them. everyone who takes part in creating something is important, and it's fucked to only acknowledge specific people in that process.
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tonycamonte · 1 year
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#went 2 a party + i feel like dirt like idk i feel so ugly + gross + at the same time i feel like ive gotten less ugly since i came out +#i look better as a guy but i still feel. not good + also party was at my family friends house + we were lookin @ pictures from when we#were kids like 8-14 ish and ughhhhh im so weird looking + also i was so skinnnyyy then i wanna die........................................#like theres a photo of me + two friends + ummmmmmmm i just want to die im sorry this is majorly stupid idk what im talking about#+ i just feel like me + my best friend have nothing to talk about + i have no friends + it has 2 be my fault because im like. the only#common factor in nobody liking me + i just feel like shit!! and i dont want to be like whiny and annoying and ugly and unfunny but im#not doing it on purpose............ ughhhh like ive changed so much in 2 yrs bc i was like whatever im doing is making people not like me +#i felt weird so i was like im just gonna change rlly hard + like i dont think its that easy but i am different bc i keep my mouth shut more#+ now i feel like i was more likeable before i hated myself + tried to be someone else but its like an endless cycleeeeee#whatever im just so miserable + at least when i was like more suicidal + fucked up i felt smart + less ugly#and also i hate my family + i dont want to live here + i hate my town but i dont want people to not like me but i do + i just feel like i#ruined my life............#ANYWAY IM FINE THOUGH. im goin to bed + everythings gonna be ok in the morning 🕊️#✉️
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gabessquishytum · 2 years
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You guys have no idea how close I am to writing a Hob Gadling Meets Richard the Third fic. No idea.
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