#on the bright side i did have an overall good experience. and i didn’t break anything. and my hair smells amazing

[fingertipsmp3]

I fell off the massage table 🙃

[whiskehorange]

Hi, I’m so sorry to bother you but I’ve been feeling down lately and I really enjoy reading ur blog. Is it ok if you do Jason, micheal, bubba Thomas, Brahms ,pyramid head, asa and Harry warden if possible with an S/O who’s usually happy and willing and all of a sudden she breaks down one day bawling on the couch or something and she didn’t know they were there, not wanting to make them upset or sad? Sorry if it’s really sad, I just need a lil love, I love u and ur blog! Thank you! Take your time and drinks lots of water!

Jason

Uhm, excuse me bitch what in the fuck is going on? You gave you the right to scare the shit out of Jason like that?

When he first came home the weeping made him freeze. He was positive it wasn’t you, he had never even seen you frown before so this absolutely cannot be your crying. Yet, as he walked in to see you whip around, tears streaming down your face as you look at him in pure shock you almost send him falling backwards

He doesn’t even care what made you cry of feel this way he’s going to be up your ass the entire day. Coddling, kissing, rubbing, and doing any and all for of comforting that he knows how to do

Jason absolutely hates seeing you cry, especially as hard as you did. You’re more than welcome to talk to him about it for as long as you want whenever you want and all he will do is listen and comfort you

Jason is a very physically affectionate man, even though he is a bit hesitant at first, so when you feel yourself in a time like this, you bess’ believe that he’s going to be around you 24/7. Even a few days after that, he needs to be your therapist (which he’s real good at)

Michael

You won’t be able to see it, but Michael is panicking and sweating bullets underneath that mask. It’s an immediate fight or fight response

Michael, overall, isn’t too good with handling other peoples emotions, so don’t be surprised when he doesn’t come to you right away for any sort of comfort in those "typically ways"

Hugging, coddling, cuddling, and any typeof caressing is going to come later in the day when things have begun to quiet down. Not only is he completely unused to having to comfort you in anyway like this, but he's pretty pissed at whatever made you come to this point

The main thing Michael wants you to do is to talk to him, tell him what's wrong so that he knows just how to handle the situation: either to kill or to... not know what to do

It's very safe to say that he will get better with knowing how to comfort you if this does ever happen again, which he really hopes it won't.

Bubba

There is a lot that can make Bubba cry, at this is one of the times he wasn't expecting to. Everyday, no matter how hard it was for him, he knew he could count on your cheery face to great him when he comes running back inside

His first reaction is to panic; he's never been put in this sort of situation before with you and he really doesn't know how to approach you. He sort of just sits awkwardly next to you and whines

Comfort does eventually find your way with pets and hugs, there aren't really any verbal affirmations he can give you, but for what he lacks in communication he can make up with physical affection one way or another

A downside to Bubba, however, is that he almost has an out-of-sight-out-of-mind personality realistically. So don't get too upset if when you have some space from him that same day that he'll sort of forget you've been upset

In that case, be prepared for the exact same meltdown when he figures out how upset you've been for the second time

Thomas

Thomas' defense mode in immediately activated. Never would he have thought that he would have to be on the comforting side so you'll have to give him a minute, but it really isn't even that long

He's gentle and patient, he knows what its like to feel such extreme motions and most of all that they are pretty hard to get out, so take your time and he'll be here with you until you're back up on your feet. Literally

To say you scared him would be an understatement, but he pushes that aside to genuinely make sure that you are not physically hurt, because if that was the case whoever did it should be the one scared

Instead, Thomas has somewhere quiet for you to go with him, the least he would want is for Hoyt to complain about such "loud" crying in the house. It's better for him to give out physically comforting, too!

His go to's are hugs and petting/caressing, it's what he would want. It's comforting to say the least, but the fact that you can't even breath right doesn't go down well when he's crushing your spinal cord in a bear hug

Braham

However oblivious, he's oddly able to tell that you're acting different before you even get the chance to melt down. From all of the time spent watching you from within the walls, you can say that he knows you like the back of his hand

Brahms has absolutely no clue how to address you. Of course he's fended for himself for a long time but any sort of emotional help is foreign to him

He'll come around, of course, the moment that you do breakdown he's by your side and he's ready to do just about anything you tell him to do but he's on edge

However, the sort of comfort you will get from him will be physical, it's the best way he can quickly show any form of care for you that he thinks will work. Brahms absolutely hates seeing you this way because he want to be able to fix the problem and he just doesn't know how

He insists that you tell him whats wrong as he holds you, curled up, in his lap. Gently caressing your head and face as he listens to your soft cries and explanation. It's the best he can do for you and he knows that that he'll have to pay close attention to when you baby him next, that way he's prepared for whenever this might happen next

Pyramid Head

What the fuck even? Pyramid Head isn't going to catch on too soon, but the moment he hears your cries from anywhere he is by your side immediately

He hates it the most out everyone on this list, and I mean that heavily. Not only does he go on rampages because he doesn't know what's wrong, but it pisses him off to no end that he doesn't know how to handle it

Pyramid Head wants so bad to be able to comfort you and understand what's made you this upset that he can come across as a little overbearing, but mainly clingy. He doesn't leave your side well after you've stopped crying and makes sure to keep an eye on you from now on so that he can possibly be there before this happens again

While he isn't able to properly communicate to you, a lot of his body language displays signs of uncomforted alongside you. Just about any emotion you feel he absorbs and feels it right with you, mainly because its his way of showing you that you're not alone and he's here to spend this time with you

Just please don't ever do that again it's so stressful he likes seeing you bubbly not sad omfg-

Asa

Asa is the most unreadable, really. He's able to keep his composure the entire time as you bawl your eyes out before him, but inside he's shaking up a little. He doesn't like seeing you upset whens it's not for play of course, so it comes as a bit of a surprise for even him

He's a little hesitant to comfort you because he is surprised, but is also just one of the most distant when it comes to comfort in this way, While being used to your much brighter personality, eventually he'll get better at it for for the time being, you don't have to deal with much of him

There is some physical reassurance, so you're not completely neglected, but Asa does have other things to do. He gently takes you in his arms and leads you up to the bedroom where he lays you down, caressing your head and covering you up

He'll leave to get you water or a drink and some other small things like your phone or a small snack if you haven't eaten, but mostly your phone so that you can call or text him if you need him. From there he'll shut the lights iff and let you get a bit of sleep

Asa stays in the house and cancels any outside plans for the day and makes sure that his phone's ringer is on at all times. By the time you call him for something he'll be up to your room before the ringtone even ends

Harry

Harry is most definitely clueless and will feel like he's going to cry right alongside you. Harry is not good at handling his own emotions let alone yours

He adored being around your bright and shining face everyday, it was something that could regulate his own and he clung to you like a moth to a lamp. So, you can only image the confusion and terror Harry experiences when he comes home to you the complete opposite

It's a very frantic sort of comfort that he gives you, moving from one thing to another to try to figure out what's wrong and what do to. It's really almost as if Harry feels your emotions stronger than you do, but he wants to do everything in his power to fix you

He comes home extra aware in the future, always prepared to be there by your side in hopes to deal with your feelings better, but he still doesn't like it at all. He goes out of his way to do more things around the house of for you in general to lessen up any stress, even if there was none in the first place

[erodasfishtacos]

harry adores yn with his entire being and i can tell that she loves him just as much but the poor thing is just so scared, and by what you have showed us she has a fair reason to have struggles

Through Hell and Back

warnings: cheating, mentions of domestic violence, this could just be overall triggering if you have experienced trauma or family struggles.

this is a very important blurb to understand dynamic and history of the characters.

PLEASE let me know your thoughts.

—

Harry’s out at a bachelor party for his friend, Jack, at a noisy bar downtown where there is a mechanical bull and half-naked waitresses.

His phone rings at two-thirty in the morning, he already knows who it is and why she’s calling him so late.

He steps outside the noisy bar, “Hi puppy, y’alright?”

Harry already knew she wasn’t.

Her voice is shaky, “Er, are you still out at the bachelor party?”

If he says yes, she’ll just try to say have fun and was just calling to check in - a lie because she felt like such an inconvenience at all times.

“No, just got home,” He lied smoothly, he could hear her trying to hide a sniffle - she must have had a bad dream.

Every since she started trauma therapy, they’d been getting worse, as she worked through her struggles with a therapist.

—

“I-I don’t want to g-go in,” YN whimpers as she sits in Harry’s passenger side outside the clinic, “I can’t talk about it.”

“Baby, you need to do this. You need to talk to someone who’s trained to help you, okay? You promised you’d try it f’me,” He hums, rubbing a thumb over her wet cheekbone.

She shakes her head stubbornly, “It’s all going to come back.”

“Yes, it will. Because you didn’t work through it, you repressed it. There is a difference, okay?” Harry’s heart feels like it’s being ripped in two as YN looks like a caged animal.

YN squeezes Harry’s hand so hard it hurts but he doesn’t mind, he can feel her fear being shared through the rough touch.

She wipes her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater, “Please, H. I don’t want to remember.”

He sighs softly, “I would never force you to do something you don’t want to do. If you really want to leave, we can.”

YN searches his eyes, sees his sadness and she knows she has to push through because she loves him so much, “Will you walk me in?”

“Of course, s’fucking proud of you. My strong girl,” Harry praises, kissing the top of her head, and shutting off the car.

He walks her in, watches her as she hesitantly goes back in with her new therapist, and sits in the waiting room for the hour and a half until she comes out.

He does that every week without miss.

Drives her, walks her in, sits in the waiting room, and then drives her home.

She doesn’t usually talk much after the sessions, her eyes swollen and puffy which is a telltale sign she cried during the appointment.

Harry holds her hand on the ride home, sometimes draws her a bath or tucks her in for a nap under his covers.

One day, after therapy, they crawled into his bed together. She hadn’t said one word since she walked out of the office but she looks tiredly at Harry.

“Why?”

Harry frowns, “Why what?”

She hides her face into the fluffy pillow, words mumbled, “Why do you want me? I’m so broken.”

“Hey,” Harry responds loudly, pulling her up and giving her a serious look, “You are not broken. Even if you were, I’d love every broken piece, okay? I want you because I’m so in love with you it doesn’t make sense.”

YN shakes her head, “I don’t deserve you. You-you have to drive me to therapy every week, leave work early, have to make it up the next day.”

And well, his heart breaks a little because she truly believes that.

Harry grips her jaw, gently, “If you need to go to therapy for the rest of your life, I’ll drive you until I’m ninety. I’ll drive you five days a week if you need it.”

He continues,“I don’t deserve you, sweet girl. Strongest, bravest, most resilient person I’ve ever met. You are my soulmate and I believe that wholeheartedly.”

“I want to nap now,” She whispers, crawling back into her shell where she’s safe from the world, from facing her fears.

Harry just stares at her, the girl he’s had a crush on since fourth grade, the girl he’d been in love with since ninth.

When she felt broken, well so did he.

—

“Mum, I want to do more for her,” Harry cries to his mother one night at dinner after school.

“I know you do, Harry. There is only so much you can do. She has parents tha-“

“Those aren’t parents, mum! You know that!” He shouts angrily, “I need to do more for her. Help her!”

Anne looks at him with a soft, understanding expression, “You’re doing all you can, Harry.”

—

He was still doing all he can.

“I wa-was wondering if you wanted to come over and watch a movie?” YN acts casual despite the tremor but he won’t call her on it - on the phone at least.

“I’d love to pup, I’ll be over on a tick,” already walking away from the busy bar.

Harry can hear the relief in her voice when she says, “Okay, I’ll see you soon.”

When he uses his key to open the door, she sat on her couch with all the lights in the house on, not one off.

“Oh, pet,” Harry murmurs, all the blinds were drawn shut and he knew she’d already triple checked that the windows were locked - despite the state of the art security system he had installed for her.

“Um, so are we feeling a scary movie or romcom?” She ignores his words, picking up the remote, and pulling up Netflix.

He flicks a couple of the bright lights off until it’s normal dim and he sits next to her on the couch, taking the remote and turning off the television.

“Talk t’me,” Harry coaxes, unraveling her from the heavy weighted blanket, and tugging her into his chest.

“M’fine,” YN lies on a choked whimper.

“Y’safe, you know I’d never let anythin’ happen to you . Please puppy, tell me,” He’s not to manly to beg for her to open up.

He allows her to nuzzle her face into his neck, “He cam-came back an-and he -,” her voice drops, “broke in here and I wo-woke up as he was opening my door.”

Harry holds her for a very long time that night.

-

With Harry and her therapist’s constant encouragement she’d been able to be more open and up front with Harry - which made him feel unexaplainably proud of her.

Anna almost fucked everything up, all the hard work without even realizing it.

It was nearly three in the morning this time.

Harry was stuck at Anna’s house with her and her friends for a movie night.

He’d gotten up to go to the bathroom when his phone rings.

Anna sees who it is and picks it up, “What do you want? Harry’s busy and doesn’t have time for you right now. You know it’s not all about you, right?”

Then she hangs up, all of her and her friends giggling at how she just treated YN.

Harry is unaware of the call for a few minutes when he gets back until he gets a text from YN.

I’m sorry I bothered you. I am okay. Have fun tonight x

He scrolls through his phone in confusion until he sees the call, he glares over at Anna, “Did you answer my phone?”

She has a cocky look on her face, “Yeah, I told YN that the world doesn’t revolve around her and to leave us alone.”

All the friends are giggling - but that comes to an abrupt halt when Harry stands up, knocking over the little table of drinks with his anger, “Where the fuck did you get the idea that you could touch my phone, let alone answer it?”

All of them are quiet.

He scoffs, “Now all you annoying prats are going shut up? Get the fuck out of my way,” he orders to Anna who’s pouting.

“C’mon, it was a joke. Don’t leave,” She whines, grabbing at Harry’s arm which he instantly rips out of her grip.

“Don’t touch me. I can’t fuckin’ stand you,” He tells her honestly before storming out of her house without a look back at her teary face.

-

When he arrives at YN’s house, a book is automatically been hurled at the front door when he opens it, then another.

“Hey, puppy, stop tha’. S’just me, you’re okay. S’just me,” He coos, rearming the security system to make her feel better.

She is only in one of his shirts with the company logo on it and soft cotton boy shorts, hair frizzy atop her head.

“Y’have another nightmare?” Harry asks softly, all the lights were on again, every single one.

YN clenches her jaw, “No.”

He hardens his expression too, “I was in the bathroom when she answered that call. As soon as I found out, I came over here. Don’t be sour with me.”

“I didn’t have a nightmare.”

“I know y’bloody lying because your legs are still tremblin’. Now cut the bullshit and talk t’me, we’re not going backwards,” Harry tells her seriously, with all firmness he can muster.

“I love you.”

It takes him aback. YN told him how much she adored him but it was something that didn’t come easy for her.

To hear it flat out, well….he nearly almost melted on the floor into a pile of goop.

“I love you too, puppy.”

She takes a deep breathe, “It’s been that same nightmare, but it’s not really a nightmare? It’s a flashback to…”

YN swallows before she continues, “Remember when….when I ran from my parent’s house to yours and my dad came and found me…”

Harry doesn’t want to remember but he does.

—-

“Harry, he-he just pulled up,” YN cries, peeking out his window, “I don’t want to go home.”

“Harry, he’s screaming at your mum. I have to go.”

“Harry, I have to go before he does something stupid. I’ll be okay, I promise.”

“Harry, don’t cry. I’ll be fine, he’s just really upset. I’ll just deal with it and it will be over before we know it, okay?”

——

“I remember,” He wavers like he normally doesn’t, feeling like a helpless sixteen year old again.

It was moments like this were no matter how hard he wanted to be angry or scream at her for making their relationship so difficult, that he couldn’t be.

How could he blame her for her commitment issues?

Why she struggles to trust?

Why she never feels good enough?

“I’m sorry to bring that up-“

“Do not apologize,” Harry interrupts, “I want to know everything you experience or feel no matter how traumatic or upsetting.”

YN despite her own struggles, when she heard Harry say things like that…well she knew full heartedly that he loves her with no conditions.

She knew this was so hard on him, “I am so in love with you, H.”

His eyes automatically soften and he reacts like he’s being praised. His face lights up without him even knowing it does.

“I’ve been in love with you since I was sixteen, thank you for being my person. I appreciate everything you do for me.”

It was something she had been also working on in therapy, expressing gratitude- specifically to Harry.

And it works because Harry actually starts tearing up, eyes watering with emotion, “I love you. I’d walk through hell and back for you.”

He would and he has.

[jmnjmnjmn]

Your Noona | Requested Idol!JK x NonIdol/Noona!Reader | Fluffy Oneshot

Pairing: Idol!Jungkook x NonIdol/Noona!Reader

Sides: ChildhoodFriend!Taehyung, Friends!BTS

Keywords: noona, age gap, secret crush, f2l

Warnings: swearing

Word count: around 5,500

There is mention of a house warming party. In Korea it is somewhat traditional to bring over toilet paper and cleaning supplies when going to such gathering, so please don’t be surprised when YN talks about the stacks of tp in her apartment xd

Request

Inspo board

Masterlist

Noona

Noona is a word used by Korean males to address females older than them who they are close to (biological or not).

-

With her leather handbag full of gifts and trinkets from France weighing on her shoulder, YN pressed the elevator button. She waited in front of the heavy steel door, staring at the bright red light-up sign above it.

“10, 9, 8.” She counted in her head as the numbers went down signalling the coming of the elevator. “7, 6, 5.” She sighed, unable to brush off the tiredness caused by the jetlag. “4, 3, 2, 1.” The door slid open with a quiet bell sound. YN hesitated before pressing in the correct number. “Was it 6th or 7th?” She whispered to herself, cursing at her forgetfulness. She ended up pressing both numbers.

Looking into the mirrored back wall of the elevator she checked herself out, making sure there were no imperfections in her outfit, hair, or makeup. Her camel-coloured coat reached right to her knees, leaving just the right amount of leg out to look cute, but not feel too cold in the winter’s cold weather. She unbuttoned the outer garment to take a look at the light brown mini skirt and blazer combo she wore today. Paired with an ecru blouse, nude tights, and white leather sneakers she looked rather casual than smart.

A robotic female voice announced the elevator’s arrival on the sixth floor of the building. YN looked out the door, unsure if that was where her best friend had his studio. She stepped out onto the somewhat familiar corridor, looking around for anyone to ask for directions. She walked down the long hallway, white lights above her head, unmarked doors to either side of her, unrecognizable chatter behind most of them.

“Where are you Kim Taaehyung?” She muttered under her breath, simultaneously reaching into the pocket of her coat to fish out her cellphone. “Tae-hyung-ie.” She syllabized while typing in her best friend’s name into her contacts. She raised the device to her ear right after starting the call. “Pick up, pick up, pick up.” She whispered quickly, hoping she didn’t drive out here for no reason. The static beeping noise was abruptly broken and replaced with the familiar low voice of a boy she knew since kindergarten.

“YN noona?” Taehyung asked and his surprised tone echoed through both of YN’s ears. She looked around, taken aback by the weird stereo effect she was experiencing. She turned to look behind her and saw one of the doors she passed by opening.

“Taehyung-ie, are you at your studio?” She asked, skipping over any greetings.

“Y- yes, why?” He answered her with another question. He wasn’t expecting her call and had to excuse himself from dance practice to pick up.

“Taehyung-ie!” YN exclaimed, seeing him walk out from behind the opening door and onto the bland corridor.

“Noona?!” Taehyung yelled into the phone making her wince at the incredible volume of his voice. “Oh my god!” He discarded his phone into the back pocket of his jeans before running up to and engulfing her in a suffocating hug. “YN noona!”

“Ah, seriously?” YN gasped out the bits of air that he didn’t manage to squeeze out of her lungs with his strong embrace. “Let go of me.” She groaned, pushing him away playfully. He had the sweetest boxy smile on his face and her expression wasn’t too far off of his.

“When did you come back?” He ran his hand through his black hair. It was still slightly curly with remains of the perm he got a couple of weeks back.

“Last night, you crazy person.” She chuckled, punching his arm and he squirmed jokingly.

“Ah, noona.” He sighed, his eyes dreamy with all the happiness he was experiencing at this moment. Spontaneously he threw his arm around her shoulders, bringing her into a side hug. “I missed you.” YN felt her heart growing warmer with every second.

“I missed you too, Taehyung.” She admitted without hesitation earning a giggle from her friend.

“Why are you here?” He asked after a moment, realizing she should be thousands of kilometres away, working in her company’s European branch. “I mean- I thought you weren’t coming back until next Chuseok.” He corrected himself not to sound rude.

“Yeah, well I got bored of Paris.” She shrugged, unconvincingly since there was a mischievous grin plastered across her face.

“Bored? Of Paris? You?” He cocked his eyebrow at her, knowing she’s withholding some juicy piece of information from him.

“I just missed Korea too much to stay away for any longer.” She looked up at him with that same grin.

“Yeah, right.” He scoffed.

“And…” She elongated the word as she slipped from under his arm and stopped to stand face to face with him. “I got a promotion!” She finally exclaimed, grabbing his hands in hers.

“Congratulations!” He screamed out, matching her excited pitch.

“Thank you!” They jumped up and down, tugging on each other’s hands for a moment longer before Taehyung stopped to ask an obvious question.

“So who are you now?” YN smiled, happy to hear him ask about her new position.

“Say ‘hello’ to Y/Company’s/N’s youngest C.A.O..” She said in a jokingly seductive tone, smiling brightly. 

“What is that?” Taehyung scrunched his eyebrows in a frown. YN exhaled a chuckle at his lack of knowledge about company titles.

“God, it’s- it’s Chief Administrative Officer.” She explained but seeing his expression stay the same as it was she decided to go deeper into the description of the post. “It means I’m a top-tier executive who supervises daily operations of the company and I’m also responsible for its overall performance.”

“That’s good.” He nodded unsure if it was good.

“Hell yeah, it is!” YN laughed, wrapping her arm around his shoulders with some struggle since he was now taller than she was.

“Does that mean you’re moving back to Korea?” He looked at her with hope, but she didn’t notice as her gaze was directed forward.

“Yeah, at least for a couple of years.” Taehyung shoved her arm off of himself in shock.

“A couple of- that’s great, YN!” He pushed his chest against her face when he suddenly hugged her tightly. “I’m so happy for you!” He screamed, rocking them both side to side.

“Thank you!” She snaked her arms around his waist before pushing away. She was usually the one breaking hugs and ending sad goodbye’s because if it was up to Taehyung she would never leave his side. “I’m also so very happy, but still, a little bummed I had to leave my Parisian life behind.” She whined slightly, looking down onto her fumbling hands.

“Ah, but now you’ll start your Seoul life again.” Taehyung spoke in a tone of a visionary. He put his arm behind her back and used the other to drag over the imaginary horizon. “With me by your side, it won’t be that bad.” He added quickly.

“Won’t be bad at all.” She chuckled, putting an elbow to his side.

“That’s what I like to hear!” He laughed out. “So, when are you buying me dinner?” YN scoffed at his forwardness. Sometimes he just loved to take advantage of their month-long age gap.

“Who do you think-” She was getting ready to teasingly scold him, but interrupted her with a loud call.

“Jungkook-ie!” He exclaimed, looking to the door he earlier exited. “Look who’s here to buy us dinner.”

“You little- wait, that’s-”

YN barely managed to keep her jaw from dropping at the sight of the boy she last saw about a year ago - face to face at least. She saw all the boys of BTS all the time during her Skype calls with Taehyung, they’d often drop by to chat or whatnot, Jungkook included, but seeing him in real life… Was an experience, to say the least. He was fit, there was no way around it. Well dressed. With a handsome face and a good haircut. YN sighed as she was reminded of her small crush on the boy.

To add gasoline to the flame Jungkook had a similar experience seeing YN, standing under his hyung’s arm in the middle of the sixth floor’s corridor looking so… Breathtaking. Ever since he realized he had a crush on her he… He merely couldn’t find any other way to describe her. She changed so much in the passing years, evolved, grew into herself. He wasn’t expecting to see her and if she paid him enough mind she would notice how shocked and flustered he was. However, preoccupied with the excitement of seeing her best friend again and the time pressure of having to go meet her realtor in just a short while she didn’t. Jungkook inhaled sharply in an attempt to calm himself down and stop the racing of thoughts in his head.

“YN noona!” He exclaimed with excitement and shock lining his voice. “When did you-”

“Last night.” Taehyung interrupted him, dragging YN under his arm to walk closer to the other boy.

“And for how-”

“For good!” He interrupted him again and Jungkook’s eyes widened at the prospect of seeing YN more often because if she was going to stay in Seoul she was most definitely going to hang out with Taehyung and if she hung out with him he could tag along and stare at her all he wanted, admiring her beauty, getting lost in the sweet sound of her voice, the smell of her-

“Hey, that’s not decided.” YN replied, poking her best friend in the side and removing Jungkook out of his daydream.

“For a couple of years at least.” Taehyung explained by quoting her earlier words.

“That’s great.” He smiled at her as they stood right by each other now. “It’s so nice to see you again. You look healthy.” She smiled at his kindhearted comment, not paying it much mind while he cursed himself out in his head for not saying something more personal or meaningful.

“So, noona what are we eating?” Taehyung asked, rubbing her shoulder.

“Nothing, Taehyung!” She scolded him, instantly jumping from under his heavy arm. “I only came by to say ‘hello’ and give you…” She reached into her purse and pulled out a big paper bag. “This.” As soon as she showed them the packageTaehyung’s hands were already on it, discarding the bag and opening the box hidden inside.

“Yes!” He hummed, looking inside to see a bunch of miniature croissants with different toppings and fillings, ones YN always raved about and promised to bring over whenever she was going to visit.

“I hope you like them as much as I do.” She said smiling at the content in his eyes. As much as she hated having to pay for his meals when they ate together she also loved seeing him get excited over certain dishes and simply eat. “Just don’t eat them all in one sitting.” She cautioned him already imagining the stomach ache he would have to endure if he did that. “And leave some for your friends.” She added gesturing to Jungkook’s hungry stare.

“I won’t, noona.” He assured her quickly and closed the box.

“I have an apartment viewing in about…” She glanced at her wristwatch and noticing how late it was already she sighed slightly. “Ten minutes. I’ll buy you dinner next time.” Taehyung pouted sweetly at the sound of her words even though he knew there was no way for him to get out of the studio right now.

“You’ll have to invite us over to your new place, noona.” YN smiled warmly at Jungkook who finally spoke up again. He smiled brightly at her, showing his bunny-like teeth she adored.

“Ah, I work a lot.” She breathed out, imagining how would be hosting the entirety of BTS in a tiny studio apartment because there was no way she could afford anything more if she wanted to live close to her work in Gangnam-gu. At least not yet. “I don’t know if my schedule will allow me to do that.”

“Is that your excuse to get out of treating us?” Taehyung teased her, pulling on the sleeve of her woollen coat.

“How did you know?” She shot right back with a cheeky smirk that quickly turned into a loving smile. “Keep reminding me.” YN wrapped her arm around his back to pat it caringly. “Hopefully soon our plans will align and then I will buy both of you whatever you want.” Both boys smiled with hope glistening in their eyes at her promise.

-

“Coming!” Jungkook heard YN’s muffled voice right after he pressed on the bell. He swallowed loudly and within seconds she opened the door. Dressed in more of a laid back outfit than he was used to seeing her in - a simple t-shirt, a pair of high waisted beige pants and thinly rimmed silver glasses - she still managed to both knock the wind out of his chest and make him feel underdressed. “Hi! Oh-” Her happy expression faded into a slightly confused one. “I thought you would come over together.” She stepped to the side to let him walk past her and inside the apartment.

“Ah, didn’t Hyung tell you?” He asked, slipping his black boots off as she locked the door behind him. “He had to stay late for dance practice. He said to order without him.”

“No, Taehyung called me already.” Jungkook barely stopped himself from grinning. Taehyung’s last-minute call to YN was part of a much bigger plan. “I meant Jimin Oppa.” She clarified, leaving her keys in the lock. “I thought he would come with you.” Jungkook scrunched his eyebrows, hoping his acting skills were good enough to make his performance believable to her.

“I meant Jimin Hyung too.” He slipped off his jacket and she took it to place it on a hidden hanger in a closet behind her. “He’s still at the studio. I didn’t see Taehyunf-ie Hyung there.” He added.

“Oh. Weird. ” YN frowned in confusion. “None of them said anything in the group chat or anything. I mean Taehyung called me, but-”

“Ah, Jimin must have just forgotten.” He shrugged, playing it off. “You know how he is.”

“I guess.” She nodded before turning to face him. In the thin hallway of her apartment there couldn’t be more than forty centimetres of space between them - an amount that to Jungkook seemed like an unswimmable ocean at this moment.

“So it’s just the two of us until they decide they’ve had enough dancing for the night.” He smiled, feeling the blush creeping up onto his ears and slowly making its way onto his cheeks.

“If they decide that.” She giggled only making him feel warmer in the face.

“So, noona, will you show me around?” He asked in hopes of taking her piercing gaze off him so she didn’t notice his nervous state.

“Yes, of course.” She exclaimed, excited all of a sudden. “So where we are now is my tiny genkan.” She gestured to the small space they stood in - a lowered, tiled area, a little smaller than a square meter. “Here is my wall of closets.” She tapped on the white doors behind her, hiding tons of storage much needed in an apartment as small as this one. “Here is my tiny bathroom.” She walked to the door next to him, switching on the lights to reveal a modern bathroom - something hard to come by in buildings that weren’t newbuilds. “Please don’t mind the toilet paper stacks, I’ve had friends come over for a housewarming party last weekend.” She chuckled, pointing to the surprising amount of toilet paper stacked under the shower. From the bathroom she led him to the main space of the flat. “Here is my kitchen-living-dining-office-room combo.” The room wasn’t big, but it somehow still managed to fit a kitchenette, bar and coffee table, some shelves, and a decently sized couch. “In that nook over there is my bed, you can’t really call that a bedroom, but it’s fine and here- here is my favourite part of this whole place.” YN almost skipped to the large sliding door on the back wall of the apartment. She pulled on it and gestured for him to take a peek inside. “The sunroom!” She exclaimed happily. “It’s dark now, but believe me in the mornings it’s just breathtaking.” Jungkook smiled at the sound of the word.

“Yeah, I bet.” He murmured, glancing over the small rectangular space constructed of mostly windows where YN put up some plants and a tiny table with chairs.

“What do you think?” She asked leaning on the door frame, dangerously close to him.

Truth be told her apartment was everything he expected it to be. Small, but not cramped. Neatly decorated and clean, but not entirely perfect. It didn’t give off a vibe of being creepily overplanned as if taken out of an IKEA booklet. It felt warm and homey, but most importantly it smelled of her which he simply adored. 

“It’s nice.” He smiled, looking down at her. “Cozy. It suits you.” She batted her eyelashes, playing shy.

“Thanks.” She muttered before looking straight at him again. “You hungry already?”

“Starving.” Jungkook breathed out with a slight chuckle, letting the tension in his body loose.

“Let’s order then.” She chirped, reaching for her phone to scour the apps for something tasty.

-

Jungkook’s eyes widened, staying focused on YN’s throat while she downed almost the entirety of her glass. The two of them sat on the carpet-covered floor of her apartment, back resting against her sofa, soft music playing from a Bluetooth speaker in the background, boxes of chicken and fries on the coffee table.

“Drink slower or you’ll get in trouble.” He chuckled, licking his fingers clean from the chicken he just ate.

“This is my first beer.” She shot back, almost choking on the last sip of the fizzy beverage.

“You don’t want it to be the last.” He said in a jokingly warning tone earning an overdramatic eye roll from the girl. “Drinking fast makes you get drunk faster. It was scientifically proven that-”

“Ah, let me do what I want.” She interrupted him, laughing through her words. “If you weren’t Taehyung’s friend I would kick you out already.”

“No, you wouldn’t.” He smirked, hoping for his words to ring true and with the way she smiled at him he was almost certain they would. “Something came to my mind on my way here.” YN leaned her head against her bent leg and hummed, signalizing for him to go on. “Knowing your future is the shittiest feeling of all.”

“Yeah?” She looked up at him curiously, resting her chin on her knee now to see him better. “What’s your shitty fortune then?” Jungkook sighed, letting his head fall back onto the soft cushions of the couch behind him.

“I’ll live my life the way I am expected to.” He murmured. “I’ll show up where I’m needed. I’ll sing when people want to hear it. Dance when they want to see it.” His words carried an unimaginable weight with them. A weight YN imagined would break any other man, but not him. “I’ll get married in my late thirties or early forties, because ‘what even is an idol that’s not single?’.” He chuckled sadly. “And after all that I’ll fade away and- what?” He stopped his reasoning as the sudden sound of her muffled scoff.

“You won’t fade away.” She shook her head and straightened up. Hearing Jungkook say all of that made her heart ache. “You’re too good for that.” She patted his shoulder firmly. “Too cool.”

“You think I’m cool?” He muttered out the question so quietly it got drowned out by YN’s next argument.

“Also you have to create your fate.” She said in a stern tone that Jungkook couldn’t possibly take seriously after hearing her call him cool. “I think I heard that in one of your guys’ songs.” 

“Am I cool to you?” He repeated himself.

“Don’t interrupt me.” She scolded him, taking advantage of their age gap. “You can change your life depending on what you do, Jungkook-ah.” She looked into his deep brown eyes and seeing an unfamiliar shine in the otherwise perfect irises she decided to add one more comment to her speech. “Just don’t do anything too reckless.” She rested her hand on his shoulder for a second. “I would hate to watch you getting hurt.”

Jungkook smiled at her, sincerely, with all his heart. Her words gave him hope and courage. He breathed in sharply, showing off his bunny-like teeth in a wide smile.

“All the girls I dated- ah, it sounds like I dated a lot of girls.” He chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “All those girls, those moments…” He continued despite knowing she must be a little taken aback by the change in topics. The two of them never talked about their romantic lives with each other for which he was grateful because if he heard of even one boy that wasn’t him hitting on YN he was sure he’d implode. “I thought that was what love feels, but in reality, it might not have been love at all.” YN frowned sadly, her eyes still on his, getting lost in their beauty. “Not true love at least.”

“What even is true love?” She scoffed, breaking eye contact. If she was going to say what she thought of just seconds ago she couldn’t be looking at him. “I’ve never been in love.” She confessed without much hesitation now that she averted her gaze.

“Never?” She simply hummed out an agreement while looking at her feet on the fuzzy rug. “I have. Actually, I still am.” YN smiled, but her gaze remained down.

“Lucky you.” Jungkook traced her movements with caution, not wanting to say too much or too little. This moment was important and he wasn’t going to mess it up.

“Yeah. There might be some luck in my situation.” He was being vague and she easily read it in his voice that he wanted her to ask him more. As new as this situation was - since she never talked to Jungkook about this kind of stuff - it also felt almost natural.

“Are you together?” He stayed silent so she decided upon explaining her question further. “With the girl that you’re in love with.”

“Ah.” He exhaled weakly, leaning his head on the couch again, but keeping his eyes on her. “Not entirely.” YN looked at his blonde hair scattered on the grey cushioning of the sofa. Later her stare travelled to his forehead, his strong eyebrows and then his deep brown eyes that contrasted so perfectly with the lightness of his hair.

“How so?” The corner of his lips tugged upwards as she took the bait he was trying to give her.

“Well, we’re not dating-” His eyelids fell slightly as his gaze went to her lips and then opened back up as it came to her eyes again. “- but we are in the same room.” YN exhaled a slight chuckle and smiled at him sweetly.

“You are a lot smoother than the last time we talked.” She admitted, still hugging onto the leg she had up to her chest. She felt oddly comfortable with his corny confession, taking it as a weak joke of some sort.

“Smooth enough to get you to agree to go on a date with me?” He asked, staying in the same relaxed position. YN shook her head slightly, looking down once more, releasing it might have not been kidding.

“I’m your noona.” She muttered under her breath. Jungkook shifted from his previous spot and shuffled to sit closer to her. At this point YN was sure he wasn’t kidding though she kind of wished for him to be.

“By less than two years.” He said sternly, sitting right in front of her, scanning her face up and down while she didn’t dare to even glance at him.

“Still, it’s-”

“It’s what?” He interrupted her at which she lifted her face, making their eyes meet. The glimmer she noticed said it all.

“Inappropriate.” She seeped through gritted teeth. YN never thought the boy could see her as anything more than his senior, his noona, his bandmates childhood best friend who bought him dinner whenever she came over.

“Pft.” Jungkook scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Says who?” He asked, cocking his eyebrow.

“Everyone, Jungkook.” She declared and raised her finger at him right as he opened his mouth. “And don’t say ‘fuck everyone’!” He shook his head before coming up with a different comeback.

“So stop making excuses and face your feelings.” This time it was her that scoffed.

“Who says I have any feelings for you?” Jungkook felt his stomach turn. He considered getting rejected, but coming face to face with it he wasn’t prepared to take that blow.

“M- my gut.” He stuttered.

“Your gut?” She shot him a patronizing stare. Seeing that look in her eyes angered him and anger gave him a rush of courage he needed.

“Yes. Stop repeating my words.”

“Stop disrespecting your noona.”

“Stop taking advantage of our age gap.” YN sighed breaking the staring contest and brought her other leg up as if to shield herself from him. “If we were in Paris or Madrid or anywhere else you lived while you were working in Europe you wouldn’t think twice about it and you know it. If the roles were reversed and I was older it wouldn’t be a problem either.” He spoke from his heart and she knew he was right. “Why is it suddenly so important when you’re in Korea?” She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to stop herself from blowing up on the poor boy. He wasn’t the one to blame for the norms generally applicable in Korea when it came to dating.

“Because of societal rules.” She uttered out quietly. Feeling the pain in her voice made Jungkook want to be close to her, wrap his arms around her and whisper sweet nothings into her ear, but he didn’t want to cross any lines so he opted for just shifting closer to her. Close enough so the sides of his thighs touched her curled up legs.

“It’s two years.” He whispered, twirling a piece of her hair between his fingers. “Barely two years.”

“To you.” YN murmured, faced away from him.

“And to you?” Her shoulders rose and fell down abruptly as she sighed deeply.

“Stop it.”

“My mom is older than my dad.” He started slowly, now stroking her arm. “By two years too.”

“Is she?” He smiled at the hopeful change in her tone.

“Yeah.” He purred. “And to make it even less socially acceptable she was the one that hit on my dad, not the other way around.” YN chuckled, sending a shiver of excitement down his back.

“So that’s where you get your determination from.” Jungkook hummed in agreement.

“You bet.” YN straightened up, pushing his hand away. With great struggle, she managed to look him in the eyes again.

“Jungkook-ah, I-”

“YN Noona, I like you. A lot.” He interrupted her as soon as their stares met. “And your age was never a factor in me coming to those feelings.”

She stayed silent for a moment after he said that, keeping eye contact and after that short while Jungkook saw her legs drop down as she came into a kneel. Her soft palms made contact with the warmth of his cheeks bringing his lips to her own. His hands instantly travelled to her waist, guiding her to sit in his lap, her legs draped to the side. She teased him by biting on his lower lip lightly, asking for him to open his mouth to her and he did, allowing her tongue to dance alongside his as if they kissed like this a million times before.

“How am I going to tell Taehyung about this?” YN asked after breaking the kiss. Her fingers were tangled in his hair, his hands caressed the bare skin of her back under her t-shirt.

“He already knows.” Jungkook smiled against her lips as he leaned forward to plant a wet peck on them.

“What?” YN looked at him wide eyed and he smiled brighter. Her gaze fell down to the space between their chests as she felt a hint of pinkish lush blossom on her cheeks.

“Did you really think both him and Jimin had to bail last minute, leaving me and you all alone?” Jungkook grazed his nose over hers in an attempt to get her to look back at him again, but it didn’t work. “I told Hyung I was going to confess to you this morning.” Her eyelashes fluttered slowly and he was able to look into her shining eyes once again. “He came up with this plan and even cheered me on.”

“Really?” YN asked in disbelief, wrapping her arms around his neck and resting them upon his shoulders. He liked it, the weight of her body on him, it made him feel strong and needed. 

“Yeah, I told him that I liked you a long time ago.” He noticed the questioning raise of her eyebrows, but kept talking as if he didn’t. “Ever since then he’s been teasing me about it, but when I spoke to him this morning he was so serious.” Jungkook rolled his head back exhaling a small laugh at the memory of the conversation he had with Taehyung earlier in the day. The small movement exposed the skin of his neck to YN and her eyes naturally travelled to the surface she never before paid much attention to, but now wanted to shower with not only kisses. “He even gave me a speech about how I can’t ever be mean to you and ruin your guys’ friendship and that I should treat you right-”

“And will you?” She tugged on his shoulders lightly, but he was faster in his reaction. He straightened up and rested his forehead against hers.

“Are you kidding me? Of course.” He spoke in a low, calm voice. “So?”

“So what?” YN smiled, running her fingers through the hair on the back of his head - a motion he already grew to love.

“Are we like a thing now?” He grinned without hiding his excitement. Jungkook wanted them to be ‘a thing’, something, anything, as long as it was him and her.

“Take me out first and then I’ll make up my mind.” She joked, keeping the same smile on her lips. Jungkook leaned forward, pulling her hips closer as their mouth crashed in a quick yet passionate kiss.

“What are we waiting for then?” He smirked into the kiss. “Let’s go.”

“Now?” She asked, pushing his chest away so she could see him whole and make sure he wasn’t joking. 

“It’s still early.” He shrugged, bringing his hands to her upper back. “We can fit in a romantic walk by the river and I’ll treat you to a ridiculously expensive dessert after.” YN chuckled at his simple proposition. It seemed so heartfelt, so tempting. She let her hands travel mindlessly from his hair to his shoulders, then neck, jaw. She pulled him in to leave a sweet peck on his hungry lips.

“Lead the way.”

[heyitsmerose]

Ateez Reaction to their s/o having pmdd (Hyung Line)

PMDD - (Premenstrual dysphoric disorder) Is a menstrual disorder that many women have that causes extremely painful period cramps, nauseousness, sever mood swings and is overall quite frustrating to deal with. I am writing this imagine from my experience of pmdd, however remember everyone’s body is different, and in no way do I want to generalise any illness. Okay thank you, happy reading! :)

Word Count: 2.5k

Mature Language*

Smut content

Hongjoong: 

It was Friday night, and that meant movie night for you and Hongjoong. It was something you suggested, and although Hongjoong refused initially, you know how much he secretly loves it. Probably more than you in fact. This week, it was your turn to pick a movie, and you had picked a simple rom-com, one that you’ve watched hundreds of times and one that both you and Hongjoong absolutely loved. You sat on either side of the couch with a bowl of popcorn in the middle. 

About halfway through the movie, you noticed Hongjoong staring at you, you looked back up at him and shrugged, asking him what was wrong only for him to sigh and shake his hand. You were confused to say the least, however when you looked back up the movie, you realised why he was acting the way he was. You saw the lead actors cuddling up together on the couch, it was one of your favourite scenes, as the characters finally realised their love for eachother. In your case however, you realised Hongjoong wanted to cuddle you too, but was too shy to admit it. You sneakily took that as a sign, and scooted closer to him. The second he saw you scooting closer, a wide smile erupted on his face, and he took you in his arms. It was small moments like this that made you realise how much you loved him. You scooted closer to him and buried you head in his chest, while he rested his chin on your head. He wrapped both his arms around your waist and nuzzled your neck. 

“I love you so much” He whispered

“I love you more” You whispered back taking his knuckles and kissing them

Another 20 minutes later, you started to find the position you were in a little uncomfortable. You were on your period anyways and your chest was starting to feel really sore. You tried moving Hongjoong’s arms away from you subtly, but he noticed and looked at you. You just smiled and shook your head while watching the movie again. A few minutes later, your chest started feeling really sore, and you decided to just massage it to relieve the pain. This didn’t go unnoticed by Hongjoong however.

“Um babe, what are you doing?” He asked, genuinely curious.

“Nothing sorry, my chest feels a little sore” you croaked out, already feeling the strain in your back too.

“Ahh, you’re on your period, it’s the 17th” He realised all of a sudden

“Wait you- how did you know?”

“I just remember” He shrugged a blush growing on his cheeks

“Anyways, do you want me to help?” He asked sincerely 

“Sure” You responded chuckling, thinking he was joking. Instead he just moved your hand aside and slid his hands under your thin white top.

“Wait, you’re being serious” You asked genuinely surprised. You hadn’t done anything intimate yet, despite making out a few times, this was definitely a first.

“Yeah” He said nonchalantly, unhooking your bra. He let your bra fall to your stomach, before taking it out and throwing it to the side. He then put his hands back under your shirt, not touching you yet.

“May I?” He asked lovingly, looking you straight in the eyes. You nodded, and his hands gently made contact with your stomach. You immediately got chills and he kissed the back of your neck, giggling. 

He then proceeded to slowly glide his hands up, cupping both breasts in his hands. Instantly, you sighed in relief and comfort. He started kneading them slightly, skilfully using his fingers to ease the tension. He kissed the nape of your neck and squeezed you breasts tighter. You gasped and sighed, feeling like you were in heaven. He then trailed his hands further up towards your shoulders and back using his fingers to put pressure on certain points and relieve the tension. You sighed in response, assuring him that you felt better. He trailed his fingers back to the front, and took his hands out of your tshirt. You turned around in his lap, and kissed him on the jaw.

“Thank you” You said sincerely looking at him with nothing but love in your eyes.

“Any time babe” he responded kissing your nose. 

This became a regular occurrence, and he often gave you massages during that time of the month.

Seonghwa:

You and Seonghwa rarely got time together due to his busy schedule, however after a lot of begging the KQ staff, all the boys had gotten the weekend and a few days off. You and Seonghwa particularly were overjoyed, and he quickly booked a weekend getaway for the both of you. It had been so long since you last got to spend time together like that, so you were excited to say the least. 

Once you both arrived at the location, you were thrilled to see mountains and a river just from your balcony. You couldn’t have asked for more. You wanted to simply lounge around in your hotel room all day, since it was the first day of your period. Knowing you had pmdd, you knew the best option would to be to stay at the room for just a night, and to just let it pass. You changed into some black thin leggings and one of Seonghwa’s hoodies and made yourself comfortable on the big bed and fell asleep. A few hours later you were awoken by Seonghwa’s honey like voice.

“Baby, it’s time to get up, I’ve made a reservation for the both of us at a restaurant nearby.” 

Not wanting to disappoint him, and feeling very grateful, you changed into a simple above the knee, bodycon dress and did your makeup quickly. The second you stepped out, a bright red blush spread across Seonghwa’s face, only for him to come closer and lovingly kiss your on your temple.

“I love you” He whispered

“Me too” you whispered back into his chest

While walking down to the restaurant, you kept pausing while walking due to dizziness. This was common during your cycle. Due to heavy bleeding, you often felt dizzy, however you tried hiding it so Seonghwa would not get worried. After a while however, he realised how you kept falling behind, and he decided to ask you what was wrong. As he approached you though, you swayed forwards and fell into him. 

“Hey, hey, hey, Y/N what’s wrong? Is everything alright?” He asked, putting his hand around your waist to hold you up. You tried looking back up to him, but your eyes kept drooping and your legs felt wobbly. 

“No, it’s just, I’m on my period, and I feel a little dizzy, nothing too much though” Seonghwa tilted your chin up to look at your face and without a word, bent down with his back facing you. 

“Hop on” He said. You were too dazed to respond, and simply obliged. He turned in the opposite direction and began walking home.

“No, no, no wait where are we going, the restaurant is the other way” You told him as sternly as you could.

“Hun, did you expect me to take us to the restaurant, when you’re obviously in pain? Besides you’re more important, so please don’t ever hide stuff like this. I know how bad your periods can get.” He said softly, only for you to hear. 

“But the reservation-”

Nevermind that, I love you, okay, and you come first, besides I packed some ramen too, and I’m kind of in the mood for that.” He said and you chuckled at him. 

The rest of the way you both sang songs while walking home, and once you did reach home, he babied you to no end. 

Yunho:

You and Yunho were out with the rest of Ateez for lunch just to enjoy yourselves and take a break from their busy schedules. You were all out at this new cafe/restaurant, and it was not too far from the dorms. Your period wasn’t going to come for another 3-4 days at least, but the cramps had started and you tried your best to power through it. You didn’t want to bother Yunho, and so you agreed to lunch with a smile on your face. Anyways, going out with everyone could technically distract you from the pain so why not. 

You both had arrived last, and the rest of Ateez and their significant others were already there. Everyone welcomed the both of you, and after you said your greetings, you both sat down. Being the talkative outgoing person Yunho was, he was having fun while laughing loudly and talking to his friends. You adored this side of him. He was acting like such a child and you were reminded of why you fell in love with him. Everyone decided to play a game of truth or dare, and you simply agreed. 

At this point however, your cramps had begun to set in, and every once in a while you let out a pained whine or sigh. You played for a few rounds, but nothing too serious happened. Except for you having to scarf down an entire lemon, and Wooyoung and San having to kiss eachother on the cheek. After a few rounds, everyone decided it was time to order. While going through the menu however, you felt a sharp pain shoot through your abdomen, and you banged your head down on the table. The rest of the members were talking loudly so they didn’t seem to notice. Yunho however, did. In fact, the second he heard the clanking of the forks and spoons, on the table after you head had hit it, he went into panic mode. 

“Y/N?!” He whisper yelled.

“yeah” you groaned out

“What’s wrong are you alright?”

“Yeah, it’s just I have really bad period cramps and I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to bear them.” You sighed out, your voice cracking at the end. 

“Hey, you should have told me before we left, you’re more important than this lunch meet up, we can always reschedule”

“I know, I just don’t know what to do now, I’m sorry for ruining lunch” You said, your head still against the table.

“It’s alright sweetheart, we can leave” He said. He gave you the cap he was wearing to cover your face, and proceeded to fake a call.

“Hello? OH MY GOODNESS, NO WAY!” he yelled into the phone.

Everyone looked at him weirdly, while you simply chuckled at is funny antics. 

“Okay everyone, my pet parrot just gave birth, we gotta go! bye everyone!” He yelled as he pulled your hand and left the cafe. You heard a few laughs and giggles from the rest of the members and a “he doesn’t even have a pet parrot”, while the both of you just giggled and walked home. 

Upon reaching home, he got you a heating pad and offered to give you a nice massage to ease the pain. It was safe to say, all pain was soon forgotten.

Yeosang:

You and Yeosang were quite the couple. Yeosang, despite being known to dislike skin ship, loved initiating it with you. Quite ironically, he was always the clingier one, in need of affection. You didn’t mind thought, obviously. It was a normal night, and you were both cuddling. One of his arms around your waist and the other in your hair, playing with it, with your head in his chest, inhaling his musky scent. It was not abnormal to cuddle for hours as it was a way for the both of you to take a break and spend some time together, in a relaxing way. Noticing it getting quite late, the both of you decided to sleep and so he picked you up, with your legs around his waist and tucked you to bed. He soon crawled under the blanket too, and put his arm under your head. You snuggled into his neck and kissed it lightly before falling asleep. 

About a few hours later, it was around 2 or 3 in the morning and you felt slightly nauseous. You were on your period anyways, so this wasn’t anything new. Slightly groaning in your sleep, you tried to ignore it to no avail. Soon, the pain and nausea got so unbearable you couldn't help but cry. You didn’t want to wake Yeosang up, so you just silently cried into his shirt, while whimpering softly. You soon felt his hand trail up under your shirt and rub circles on your skin.

“Baby, I can hear you, is everything alright? Why are you crying” He said huskily. Swearing at yourself for waking him up, you tried turning to the other side to avoid him, only for him to sit up and take you in his lap.

“Y/N please tell me what’s wrong, I want to try to help you, please” He said softly into your hair. 

“I don’t know, I feel nauseous and my stomach hurts, it’s probably just my period cramps” You said sighing. The second you did however, you felt bile rise up in your throat so you ran to the washroom. You threw up whatever you had into the toilet, and painfully clutched your stomach.

At this point, Yeosang was also wide awake and was up and by your side as instantly. Tears were flowing out your eyes due to the frustration and pain. 

“I’m sorry Yeo, I just I don’t know why this is happening to me” you sighed, frustratedly. You clutched your stomach again and let more out, while he held back your hair and pat your back. He gently kissed your temple, and decided to get meds for you.

“Don’t apologise hun” he said while walking back to you. He wiped your lips and helped you brush your teeth, after which you took the meds. Despite feeling a little better now, you still sat on the ground in the washroom, feeling guilty.

“Hey Y/N, are you still feeling nauseous?” Yeosang asked carefully, crouching down to take your chin in his hands.

“No, it’s just I can’t help but feel guilty for waking you up late in the night, every month, I must seem so burdensome. You cried, looking at him with watery eyes. 

“You have no reason to feel like that hun, I love you and I’ll be there for you no matter what” He said, wiping your tears with both his thumbs and holding you close. 

He held you close for the rest of the night, humming you songs and rubbing your stomach.

[uh-velkommen]

The White Lotus, HBOMax

Alright four episodes in and things are finally starting to ramp up. My face throughout the whole episode was stuck on discomfort. This show packs so much tension in every 45 minutes that I'm constantly waiting for somebody to pop off or something crazy to happen but instead we get teased with the smallest little plot pusher. Which is working. I'm officially intrigued. I do wish I knew the overall point of the show because that's what would've helped me decide if I wanted to keep up with but now my determination to find out how this all ends is doing just that...

Character breakdown + Spoilers/Predictions

Armond: The manager of the White Lotus resort. I love him in all his poor choices. He's just constant chaos simply because he has the power to create it. He's also the biggest driver of drama. He lies a lot, almost pathologically, and he will carry those lies to the grave for no real reason.

Nicole Mossbacher: Resort guest, Mark's wife, and Olivia and Quinn's mom. She's a pretty basic character who is teased about possibly having OCD and working during vacation. She was pretty chill in the first 2 episodes but every once in a while she says things that gives off I'm a centrist but my views lean a little more conservative.

Mark Mossbacher: In the beginning he's stressing about possibly having testicular cancer because his father died of cancer... Turns out his father had AIDs. He has a depressive episode over his dad being gay and then, while drunk, he inadvertently comes onto the Armond. The next day Armond tests the waters with Sober Mark and we get uncomfortably funny scenes of Armond coming onto Mark in front of the whole family. Mark's a very passive dude who doesn't do anything exciting in the show but we just find out that he has, in the past, repeatedly cheated on his wife and didn't tell her (he told his son that he did tell Nicole but I don't believe it) I think his theme is just being genuinely unhappy with his life at the moment.

Olivia Mossbacher: She's a college sophmore and has many moments where she calls out her parents questionable statements. She carries herself with a weird nonchalance where you'd think she's a mean girl but she's only ever expectedly mean to her brother. However, she brought along her friend Paula and we start to see that their friendship is built on some unspoken competition. The girls do tons of drugs on vacay until Armond gets his hands on them and breaks his 5 year sobriety. This is when and why shit starts to hit the fan. They know he stole the drugs but because everyone avoids admitting to having illegal drugs, no one is ever outright accused.

Paula: Olivia's poc friend, possible hypochondriac, and supplier of drugs, has secret rendezvous with one of the Hawaiian native resort workers. She refuses to say anything when asked about her nightly disappearances but Olivia knows why or for whom Paula keeps sneaking off. We learn that Paula doesn't want Olivia to know about her and her beau because Olivia always wants what she has. My theory is that this wouldn't be the first time Olivia has stolen a partner of hers and I think now because Paula isn't admitting to hooking up with this guy, Olivia is gonna steal him and use Paula's secrecy as a way of blame.

Quinn Mossbacher: Involuntary loner in my opinion. He comes off as a classic video game nerd, obsessed with the internet, cant live without his Switch and Fortnite. He doesn't have any friends and he takes all the teasing from Olivia and Paula without a fuss. But he starts sleeping on the beach alone and keeps running into these amazing sights to see. This is where we start to see him blossom and speak up. Its ever so slow but in episode 4 he actually walks up to a group of guys and introduces himself, interested in their boat related sport[?] (Or maybe even the guys themselves🤞) He's also the only one who knows about the Dad's affair and stupidly hints at it at the family dinner (he's just genuinely stupid).

Shane Patton: Also a resort guest and the funniest character to me. He's your run of the mill self-centered male Karen (Kevin if you will) and he arrives at the resort with his wife Rachel. They're on their honeymoon but so many moments make you question why in the hell did these two get married? He is in an unnecessarily one sided battle with Armond. First the resort accidentally downgrades his room. Armond gaslights Shane into thinking that he never purchased the bigger room. Shane gets a receipt. Armond tells him there's a German couple staying in the receipted room longer than Shane and his wife are there so the room will not be ready for them in time. Shane finds out the Germans are actually leaving wayy earlier. Armond apologizes and books them a romantic sunset dinner on a boat. The boat is actually a funeral where a strange grieving woman, named Tanya, fails to spread her mothers ashes in the sea. Shane confronts Armond and asks for Corperate's number. Armond creates a fake business card and when Shane realizes the number is fake, he bursts into Armond's office to find him rimming a coworker while high on Ketamine. Prediction: Armond's gonna get blackmailed for abuse of power in a classic Monicagate manner.

Rachel: Shane's wife. Rachel's a journalist who actually looked up to Nicole (her job as CEO of god knows what puts her in the public eye) but when she finally got to sit with Nicole over lunch, Nicole calls her out for writing an incredibly slut shamey article, claiming that Nicole used her femininity to get her where she is now. This is the first smack in the face that maybe journalism isn't for Rachel. Well that on top of the constant teasing from Shane about her career choices. Shane's family is much more wealthy than Rachel's and he always finds subtle ways to make it known. Shane also pays her no mind, flirting with Olivia and Paula and battling Armond. Even during their arguments (which happens too many times for newlyweds) Shane doesn't look at Rachel and just gives periodic "mhmm"s and "okay"s. Also Rachel hates the Mossbacher family simply because they all seem to be doing better than her.

Now for the boring ones

Tanya McQuoid: An eccentric resort guest (which is a polite way of saying, a weird ass person who is over polite and basically pushes herself into every other character's drama in the most unintentional way, she's also bad at reading the room) She comes off as calm and quiet but we find out that her mother recently passed and she's in Hawaii to spread her mothers ashes. She becomes creepily obsessed with the resort's massage parlor manager, Belinda, after a complimentary massage and suggests becoming a beneficiary so Belinda can open up her own massage parlor. Her "obsession" could possibly just stem from Belinda showing her an act of kindness during a hard time but I know I questioned Tanya's intentions for at least the first two episodes... In episode 4, some random dude, Greg, shows up and invites Tanya to dinner after "accidentally" mistaking her room door for his own. Tanya postpones a business meeting with Belinda so she and Greg can hook up that night. The presence of these characters feel a little out of place. Unlike the Newly Weds and the Mossbacher family, there is not a lot of plot overlap. Tanya will often pop up to converse with the others and brag about Balinda's skills but she doesn't cause any trouble. Tanya's also very wealthy so I definitely thing this "Greg" has some secret plot to take down Tanya or plant something or steal her cash and unfortunately I do not think Belinda will see anything bright in her future. Her plans will be left on the backburner which I say is unfortunate because she's a kind woc who is just trying to do her job and is clearly very skeptical about going into business with this strange, rich white, resort guest.

Honorable Mention

Lani: A Hawaiian native, trainee at the White Lotus. She shows up in episode one as her first day on the job. Later we find out she's also pregnant and goes into a premature labor on the job. She has her baby and disappears for the next three episode. Come back Lani, Armond has just started getting your name right!

Show Themes

The show does touch on conversations of race and class but I would not consider this a political show or one with an agenda (it's satire). I point out the characters of color here because their race becomes a device used to create tension but not in a Token POC kind of way. All the characters are rich and they are shamed for it by the show writers. By this I mean nobody is spitting in their faces and calling them Climate Killers but the choices the characters make, the things they say, and the way they act gives the viewer something to laugh at. Their ignorant entitlement juxtaposing with the beautiful Hawaiian beaches and tragic Hawaiian history creates an underlying experience of, look at these rich people not having a good time and they can't even realize why! As for the characters, there is plenty of time to sit back and question, is this character a good person, who's the real antagonist, how do these stories intertwine, who do we root for What story is attempting to be told here? What is the message!?

[stillebesat]

Lemon Drops

Sanders Sides: Patton, Remus  Blurb: Patton just wanted to go somewhere where he wouldn’t be judged, wouldn’t disappoint...wouldn’t...screw up another relationship. (Takes place after SvS Redux) Fic Type: Hurt/Comfort, Frog!Patton  Overall Fic Warnings: Remus being Remus, Death Talk, Mentions of Nudity, Various Innuendos, Blood mentions, Negative Self Talk, Trapped/Captivity talk, Fight talk, Panic Attack Taglist in Reblog. 

There was no answer.

Patton exhaled, biting his lip as he dropped his hand, staring with only slightly blurry vision at the crown emblem on Roman’s door.

There had never been no answer before. 

Out of all the others, Roman’s room had always been open to him. No matter the time of day or night. No matter the reason. Roman...Roman would always let his door swing open and Patton could come in to spend however long he needed to inside.

Now….now….he swallowed, fighting to keep his vision from blurring further. Now...it obviously wasn’t. 

Maybe because of today this door would be closed to him forever. 

We love you. 

He hugged himself, chest aching as he turned away for the stairs, keeping his head down as he moved past both Logan and Virgil’s doors. 

Both firmly locked. 

Both silent.

Both...unhappy with him too.

Do you think there’s a limit... on how many times someone can say sorry? 

He wished there wasn’t. He wished that it would just be one more apology and things could get back to...being...better. Back to the...okay not great...but better times when his fellow Sides actually kinda wanted to be around him.

If they had ever wanted to be around him in the first place. 

Had they? 

Had they ever...liked him?

His breath hitched as he entered the kitchen, his fingers digging into his arms as he came to a stop in front of the stove.

Cooking had always made him feel better.

But what was the point of cooking for one? 

Patton closed his eyes, fighting to keep the tears pooling behind his lids from seeping out. 

He’d been so overbearing for so long. Been so set in his ways. In trying to make sure that Thomas was a good person...that...that all those icky feelings were locked up tight and pushed away that he--that he--Patton reached out blindly as his legs buckled, grabbing onto the handle of the oven, hanging onto it like a drowning man clutching to a tree root as his knees made contact with the tiles. 

Do you think there’s a limit on how many times someone can someone say sorry...before you have to admit...that they’re just bad for you?

Thomas wasn’t always a good perfect person. Despite how much Patton wanted him to be. He was...he was...Human. And humans made mistakes. His fellow Sides made mistakes. Patton...Patton himself could make mistakes.

He just wished it didn’t hurt so darn badly. 

Patton dropped one hand to his shirt, clutching at the fabric over his heart as he pressed his head against the cool side of the oven door, his throat aching with suppressed sobs as the tears he’d been fighting so hard to keep at bay flowed down his cheeks. 

Repressing depression can also be bad. 

Well...he’d--he’d never been particularly good at facing his own icky feelings either, not when returning to his room could bring such a quick jolt of happiness that he could forget for a time...all the...all the...and not let the others see...his...this...see him---

Unhappy.

Not that anyone was likely to see him unhappy here right now.

Not when they were locked in their rooms.

Avoiding him.

Because he...it felt like he’d been wrong more often than right these days. Hurting the ones he loved. 

And nothing he did seemed to fix--fix--

Patton shuddered, curling in on himself, trying to find a way to steadily breathe, to keep silent so no one would come to investigate. To--to...calm down. He didn’t--he didn’t need to become--that mutant frog again...to let his icky feelings change him like that--but it...he…

I just have a lot of feelings. 

And none of them were the right ones to help the others. 

They never seemed to be any--any--

A zing of electricity rushed through him and Patton let out a small cry as he felt his body abruptly shift.

NO. NO. NO.

He jerked his head up, gasping for breath as he caught sight of a bright green arm before it shifted back to his normal human appearance. 

NO! Patton fought to shove all the ick--sadness he was feeling away. To keep his regular appearance. He couldn’t trigg--

But the grief was welling up. Swelling like the tidal wave he’d felt before growing into that monstrous frog into a--bad guy. 

Patton shoved to his feet, heart racing his tears as he leapt for the doorway, shooting for the stairs. For his room where he could get that jolt of happiness that had to stop this--

He gasped as another electric zing zapped through him. He stumbled, falling against the door under the stairs that lead down to The Others. 

“Please.” He begged, sticky green fingers slipping off the handle as he curled back into a ball on the floor. Fighting to stay small, to not grow into that...that thing as electric pulses danced along his skin. 

Small.

SMALL.

He had to stay---

He cried out, closing his eyes as it felt like all the air was suddenly being squeezed out of his lungs and he felt himself shift further with a soft POP. He shook his head, missing the weight of the glasses on his nose and his cat hoodie around his shoulders as they fell with a muted thud to the carpet. NO FROG NO FROG NO FROG. He internally shouted, mashing himself into an even tighter ball, his voice choking off in a deep Croak. 

NO! Patton had to--he’d break something if he--he desperately synced himself out of the living room, falling down and away before anyone could come investigate the noise. 

The others couldn’t know. 

He landed with a soft plop onto a semi-bouncy surface that could only be his bed. 

Safe.

Patton drew in a shuddering breath, burying his head into the blanket, breathing in its fresh lemon scent, waiting for the familiar zing of happiness to hit him, to help him shift back to his normal human look.

He had to stay--stay---happy. Pre--pretend that things were---that it would all be okay. 

And that meant going somewhere else where he wouldn’t be judged, wouldn’t disappoint...wouldn’t...screw up another relationship further because he couldn’t control himself and became a terrible giant monster--

“FROG!”

DANGER.

Patton’s eyes flashed open barely taking in the surroundings of the softly lit room that definitely wasn’t his bedroom as he instinctively leapt before the oily voice over his head could finish pronouncing the G, terror rushing through him and coming out of his mouth in a series of frantic ribbits as he sprang off the enormous unmade bed.

SPLAT.

“Hey!” 

Patton gasped as neon red liquid flew past his face as he landed in something cold and slimy and--he didn’t want to think about just what he may be sitting in right now. No. NO. He had to get away from Remus before he...before he!

“Whoa! Wartface! Hold it!”

Patton flinched as Remus’s shadowy form towered over him and jumped--hopped? His limbs definitely were more froglike than anything human--freeing himself from the red icky liquid, to land on the cold black floor, leaving bloody red frogprints behind as he hopped yet again.

Only to have a puke yellow slime meet him in a squelchy embrace as he landed in a different container. 

What was this stuff?! 

“Froggysoggypants stop!” 

No. No way. Patton croaked as he freed himself from the second container, landing with another plop onto the blackened floor, marring its surface with red, orange, and yellow streaks as he frantically tried to run--hop away from Remus towering over him like--like--

Earlier. When Patton had towered over the others as a giant frog. But now that Remus--did that mean...had he shrunk instead?!

“GOTCHA!” Clammy hands grabbed him around the middle midleap, squeezing him tight enough that Patton was certain his eyes were bulging as he was lifted upwards. 

Remus’s crooked grin filled his vision, showing him just how small he’d become. 

He squeaked, an awkward sound coming from his frog mouth as he struggled helplessly in the Duke’s grip. 

“Look at you!” Remus breathed, easily holding him in one hand as he used the other to pull Patton’s arm out. “You’re blue!” He exclaimed, eyes sparking as he played with Patton’spaint covered pale blue froggy toes. “I wonder--”

Patton flinched, trembling as Remus ran his tongue over his back, the hairs of his moustache brushing against his skin. 

This was it. This was how he died. 

“Bleh.” The Duke gagged, pulling away wiping his mouth against his shoulder. “You’re not one of mine.” He complained, running his tongue over the fabric in a manner that had Patton cringing. 

How could Remus stand the texture of cloth against his tongue? Didn’t it--no wait. This was the Duke who ate pickled poo log deodorant. He probably loved the sensation.

“You taste far too sweet like--like--” He poked Patton between the eyes with a frown. “Like a saccharine sugar cookie under all that paint! Peh! At least taste bitter like arsenic or mucus! Frogs are covered in mucus! You should taste like that at least.” 

Patton closed his eyes, shuddering, still feeling Remus’s tongue on his bare back. It wasn’t like he could control what he tasted like! And if he tasted like cookies then that was much better than than--

Than all the ugly and gross things that would be right up the Duke’s dark, grimey, and probably blood covered alley.

But if Remus didn’t like sweet things. And if he realized who he was holding in his hands--

His heart dropped. 

It definitely wouldn’t be pretty. At all. Not when he was sure the Duke blamed Patton for being kept from Thomas’s conscious mind for so long.  

He could easily take revenge.

Remus could skewer him with a sharp stick, throw him in a boiling pot of oil or even peel him open like some sort of crazy science experiment---

Patton whimpered, the sound shifting to soft frantic ribbits as he wiggled in the Duke’s grip.

“Nah! Ah! Sticky Feet! No. Stop squirming!” Remus tightened his grip on him as Patton did his best with his odd toe finger things to find purchase to pull himself free so he could hop the heck out of there and shift back to normal away from the Side that had always given him the heebie jeebies. 

After all…it wasn’t like any of the others would come to his rescue.

Not when none of them...liked him currently. 

Not when their resident Prince and Hero who loved to save people in distress...had locked his room and refused to come out.

Patton stopped struggling, feeling a cold heavy weight settle in his stomach as he stared hopelessly up at Remus. 

Roman wouldn’t come save him. Not this time.

Perhaps it was only right that his brother, the Duke, Master of the Dark Side of Creativity, held him now. Captive. Trapped. He probably deserved it after all he put everyone through today with his…..monstrous self. 

“There there.” Remus whispered, stroking Patton’s back with a finger instead of his tongue this time. He plopped down cross-legged on the paint splattered floor, head tilting at an unnatural angle as he studied him. “You’re not mine.” He repeated softly, an eerie light shining in his eyes as he played with Patton’s toes. “Too sweet. Too sweet. Not Ro’s either. The salt on him is thick these days. Sooooooooooo~” He tilted his head the other way, a small smile playing on his lips. “What brings you here to me in my dark dismal tower and not to him in his gleaming marble castle, little sugar wartface?” 

Patton gulped, trembling as Remus brought him up to eye level, unable to do anything more in his grip. He’d already tried to go to Roman. B-b-but--

That door was shut to him now.   

“Blue...a blue frog….” The Duke mused, humming under his breath as he rocked in place. “Call me Mr. Blue...but with the downright stodgy rainbow theme all of us have going on...being blue means you can only be--” He paused, eyes growing sharp as he grinned like a feral cat about to catch its prey. 

Today really wasn’t his day. 

Patton slumped, a soft ribbit escaping him as he fought back the urge to sob. He just wanted to get away where he wouldn’t hurt the others. Where he wouldn’t be judged or hated. Where he couldn’t...couldn’t mess things up for anyone any more.

But all his icky feelings had only screwed him over more. Changed him into a tiny slimy frog. Landed him in Remus’s room where he was now trapped in the Duke’s grip. 

And now Remus knew exactly who he was. 

“Potty.” 

He flinched at the nickname, closing his eyes as his heart sunk even lower. Sure, he felt like a pile of crap right now. A tiny smelly useless pile of nothing. But he didn’t...didn’t want to be compared to a...toilet. 

“This is no place for you and your awfully tender heart.” Remus said, booping him on the nose. “Why did you come to me? Like this?”

Patton cautiously opened his eyes, confused. Why was the Duke not boiling him alive right now? Hating him too? Why was he--he---being gentle?! 

‘I don’t know.’ He whispered, his words changing to a soft croak as he spoke, rendering his words incomprehensible. 

Out of all the Sides...Remus would have never have crossed his mind as someone to come to for any reason. In a--in a perfect world he would never have to deal with the Duke at all.

“Ooooohh~ Lemme guess.” Remus flopped backwards, head landing in a pan filled with pink paint, sending neon droplets flying across the room as he held Patton high over his head. “You waiting for a kiss?” He asked, puckering his lips, drawing him close.

True love’s kiss can break any curse. 

Even if this had been a curse and not his own fault that he was now a useless tiny slimy frog, Patton knew that no-no one woul--would….no one--not even Remus--He recoiled as the moustache filled his vision, breath hitching as the gaping hole in his chest where his heart should be only seemed to grow wider. 

A kiss wouldn’t work. Not--not when...no one loved him. 

How many times? How many times can you say sorry?  

Not enough. Never enough. He couldn’t--

A fresh lemon breeze washed over him as Remus paused a hair's breadth away from pressing his lips against his face. He tilted his head, going cross-eyed as he hummed staring down at Patton.

He snorted. “No kisses? Figures. You don’t want to see us as lovers?” Remus wiggled his eyebrows, smirking as he rolled to his stomach, the room spinning like a kaleidoscope around them. 

L-lovers?! Patton squeaked, feeling his body go all warm. If he’d been his normal human self, he was sure his face would have gone bright red at that. 

Remus cackled, dark eyes glittering. “Surely as Thomas’s Heart, wittle Pittle has a teeny weenie spot of love for smelly old me if he loves all of Thomas.” 

And Patton thought his heart couldn’t break further. If he was any good at his job...then that should have been True.

But it wasn’t. 

The knowledge that he didn’t want to have any love for the Duke only made him feel worse.

What good was he as Thomas’s Heart if he couldn’t love every Side of him? 

Remus huffed, eyes growing sharp. “Oooh~” He sing-songed jabbing a finger into Patton’s chest. “Did Sappy Pappy forget he’s the center of all of Thomas’s feelings?” 

Patton kicked back smearing paint across the Duke’s arm as he wiggled in his grip. No!...Yes…maybe? He...he was...the center...but….Patton pushed pointlessly against Remus’s fingers, his throat contracting with suppressed croaks. 

What did it matter what he was to Thomas? Feelings. Morality. He wasn’t doing a very good job of being either one right now. 

The Duke wiggled his eyebrows as he made a fart noise with his tongue. “Are you trying to only be happy again? Hide all your juicy twisty feelings? How booooring, Poppyseed. You gotta let it out!” 

NO! He shook his head. Letting out his...twisty feelings had only resulted in BAD Things. He’d become a giant frog! That wasn’t good. 

Now you’re a small frog. Is that any better?

“Guess what, Potthead.” Remus dipped one hand into a pan of green paint, flicking his fingers at Patton’s face. “Hate is a feeling.” 

He flinched, raising a shaking toe finger hand thingy to rub the paint off his face, giving a loud ribbit of disagreement. Hate was such a...a strong word.  

Remus rolled his eyes, plopping Patton down in a pan of orange paint, speaking over his croak of disgust at suddenly being surrounded by more cold slimy ickiness. 

“That’s not bad, Pottycake.” The Duke said, easily catching Patton as he jumped out of the paint and plopped him into a different can of pink slime before he could blink. “You don’t have to like everything you encounter or everyone you meet.” 

Of course not, but that didn’t mean he--Thomas couldn’t pretend! Patton wiped the paint from his eyes before he doggy--froggy paddled over to the edge.

Things worked a lot more smoothly when Thomas was nice and happy.

Only it hadn’t worked out doing that this time had it?

Patton pressed his lips together, chest aching as he heaved himself out of the can. 

It didn’t matter. It would work out eventually. He just had to keep up the positive attitu--

Remus scooped him up, careless of how Patton struggled in his grip, getting slime and goo all over himself. “You know…” he clicked his tongue, dribbling purple paint all over Patton’s back. “I don’t need you to like me, or tell me exactly how you feel, but that feeling is a part of you.”

‘NO!’ He didn’t want it to be. 

The Duke’s eyes grew sharp as he lowered his hand, chuckling as Patton sprang from his grip, narrowly avoiding landing in any other pans, his feet leaving multi-colored prints over the dark floors. “It’s a part of good old Tomalongadingdong that won’t go away, Potty, no matter how much you try and shove it into a dark dusty corner and forget about it.” 

Repression can be bad.

It was--he knew that. Patton forced himself to keep hopping, crying out in frustration as he was easily grabbed around the middle and plopped back into the Duke’s lap. 

Remus had proved that as Thomas’s Intrusive Thoughts despite Patton’s best efforts to keep Thomas from ever knowing that his Dark Creativity even existed. That the bad thoughts could be--be--okay. That just because they were there didn’t mean Thomas himself was...bad. But knowing was not the same as...as...accepting. 

And he wasn’t about to accept being stuck here with Remus any longer than he had to. Patton scrunched up his face, concentrating on gathering his limbs together for a more coordinated hop. Even if he wanted to express his icky feelings--which he didn’t!--there was...wasn’t anyone left he could...could go to.  Who would ever need you? When all you do is more harm than good? 

Remus tsked, scooping Patton up and dropping him in a large can of blue paint before he could spring away.  

GAH! That. WAS. IT. ‘Would you QUIT it!’ He yelled as he surfaced, splashing paint back up at Remus’s face. 

It was bad enough already being stuck here without any hope of the others coming to get him without continuously getting tossed into paint along with it! 

He froze as the Duke threw his head back with a loud laugh.

Oh no. 

“Oooh.” Remus’s eyes glittered as he lowered his head, teeth flashing as he grinned, blue paint dripping from his moustache into his mouth. “Patteywattey has some fight to him!”

‘NO!’ Patton recoiled with a strangled croak. He’d fought far too much earlier today as that--as--tha--as the Monstrous Frog! He’d--he’d attacked Leslie, Lee and Mary-Lee. He’d even attacked Thomas without realizing--He’d--No. NO NO NO. NO FIGHTING. EVER.

He ducked down, letting the paint cover him completely, a hollow ache in his chest. He had made another stupid stupid mistake splashing back. Fighting back. That wasn’t supposed to be him! If he wanted Remus to leave him alone he shouldn’t have encouraged him by action! It should have been through words---

What words? You’re a frog. All you can do is Croak. 

It wasn’t like words had helped earlier either. Not when he didn’t...when he hadn’t known the right things to say. 

Patton felt rather than heard the splash of something else entering the paint can with him before reaching fingers grabbed him, pulling him free of the paint, if not of Remus’s grip. 

“Hiding from a fight isn’t very fun.” The Duke said as warm liquid splashed over Patton’s body, washing away the heavy weight of the paint covering him. “But then again.” His blue moustache came into view, tongue stuck out between his teeth as he carefully wiped around Patton’s eyes with a green stained towel. “You fighting against me would be really weird, Pops, despite how often you’ve threatened violence against our dear old Virgin.” He smirked.

I will physically fight you. 

Patton shuddered, gripping onto Remus’s fingers as another wave of icky feelings rushed through him, choking him to the point he could barely breathe. 

Again and again. He was reminded that he could do nothing right no matter how hard he tried. 

Virgil.

Logan.

Roman. 

Despite his efforts...he’d let them all down one after the other.

Just like the deadbeat fathers in all those tv shows.

He was a failure through and throu--

“The thing is….”  Patton looked up as Remus ran the towel down his back before setting him on the half-made bed. 

“It’s just goo and paint, Pattycake.” Remus gestured around his room to the various multi-colored splotches before resting his arms on the bed. “Using it to create--” He placed a sheet of paper on the bed along with a tube of paint, squirting a glob of red into the center of the page. “It’s just a way to express your feelings. All your feelings” He said dipping a finger into the paint, trailing it over the black sheet creating a--. 

Patton winced, looking away from the crude image. 

“There’s nothing bad about getting those feelings out. It’s what Creativity is for.” He wiggled his shoulders suggestively as he flicked his fingers at Patton splattering him with red droplets. “Didn’t you once say that you liked playing with the stuff?” 

My channel would have videos of me playing with goo and mixing paint. 

Patton frowned down at his hands, squeezing his toe finger things into fists before relaxing them on the page. It felt like a lifetime ago though. Back when he’d been trying to include Anxiety in their group. Back before everything---He hadn’t even thought about sticking his fingers into a tub of goo in ages. Not when he’d been trying so hard to keep Thomas happy. 

And failing.

“Now’s your chance, Patcasso.” With a wave of his hand the image on the paper vanished, leaving the single glob of red paint once more untouched. Remus winked as he scooped up Patton, depositing him on the large sheet right next to the glob of paint. “Stop repressing. Paint.” 

Repressing Depression can also be bad. 

But...But….painting? How could that hel--

Remus hummed, dipping his finger into the paint, idly drawing a heart right next to him. “The Heart becomes a Frog.” He murmured. “Just like one of those prudishly dull fairytale quests my dear old brother enjoys huh? With the kissing and the happily ever afters.” 

Had enjoyed...it wasn’t like Roman would want to---Patton drew in a shuddering breath before shakily dipping his hand into the paint, drawing a jagged line down the middle of the heart. 

No one loved him. 

The Duke’s eyebrows rose, eyes gleaming as he leaned forward. “A broken heart? Oooo~I do love an unhappy story.” With a wave of his hand, the rest of the rainbow appeared as globs of paint on the page. “Go on.” He encouraged, resting his arms on the bed. “What fly got into your soup?” 

Go on? But he had no idea where to start. It was just--too much. He’d been wrong--so strict and set in his ways for so long, he didn’t even know where the problems had begun between him and the others! Today was just the latest addition to a very very long list of--and--he shoved both hands into the red paint, smearing it across the heart with a muted croak. Red for his failure with Roman.

We love you. 

….Right. 

The hurt. He’d tried so hard to--but--red streaked fingers dug into the yellow paint, as he drew a lopsided crown on top of the heart, the yellow marred by lines of red. Roman refused to answer the door. To let him do what he did best. Comfort others.

Hence why everyone has shut their doors to you huh. You’re sooo good at comforting. 

Another lie. Another falsehood. What good was Morality? What good were Feelings if he couldn’t--

He shoved his hands into the dark blue paint, drawing another wobbly heart with a line through it followed by a large smear and then a ragged tie. Logan. 

Another broken heart. This one purple. Followed by the cloud and a lightning bolt. Virgil.

All streaked through with yellow. With Janus. With Deceit. 

How many times can you say sorry? 

Not enough. Never enough. He--he--Patton slammed his fists into the paint sending it flying all over the bed, chest aching as he closed his eyes.

“....Patton?” 

He shook his head, ignoring Remus. It didn’t help. Painting didn’t help. The icky feelings were still there. If he was feeling icky how could he ever hope to--

Patton gasped, jerking as splotchy green arms suddenly wrapped around him in a warm hug, squeezing him far more tightly than he was comfortable with. 

He looked up, meeting the dark eyes of another frog, one with blue tipped black spikes sticking out from his upper lip. 

Remus? Why had he--why was he hold--why was he a FROG?!

The frog gave a watery croak, holding Patton close in an embrace that was so warm it sent a wave of soothing heat through him. 

Oh Crofters...He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been hugged.

It felt--it felt---He melted into the other’s arms, burying his head against the Duke’s chest as the dam he’d tried so hard to build to hold back his tears crumbled like so much dust, leaving him sobbing in a series of squeaky croaks against the Dark Side. 

Remus made a buzzing noise, nearly like a hum as he rocked Patton back and forth, keeping up the steady too tight pressure around him. 

It shouldn’t make him cry harder. Yet Patton found himself doing just that, hot tears trailing down his cheeks. It had been so long. So long since anyone had done this with him. He’d never expected Remus of all Sides to instigate a hug with him, not when he’d spent so many years trying to keep the Duke from influencing Thomas’s everyday life. By all rights, Remus should hate him for being so strict. Should want nothing to do with him.

And here he was.

Hugging Patton.

Comforting him.

Trying to help in his own odd Remusey way.

It left him feeling all tingly inside, like butterflies dancing inside an inflating balloon as electric pulses danced across his skin. 

Fresh tears leaked through his closed eyelids. It should end soon. All hugs had to end. Remus had to pull away at some point to leave Patton feeling all cold and icky again.

And yet…

Remus didn’t move. 

The Dark Side wasn’t known for his long attention span, always fidgeting or spouting out a new topic of conversation.

But here he was...holding tight unto Patton without showing any signs of releasing his grip, his warmth as constant and steady as the Duke’s heartbeat. 

Patton drew in a shuddering breath, eyelids fluttering. He didn’t deserve this. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, voice hoarse, barely registering that actual words left his mouth instead of croaks.

Remus huffed, adjusting his grip for the first time to run his fingers through Patton’s hair, sending a shiver down his spine. “Apology accepted, Padre.”

Accepted? Just like that? No questions? Patton trembled, breath hitching, not quite believing he’d heard correctly. “Y-you--why?” 

“Mmm?” 

Patton steeled himself before looking up, registering Remus’s very human face inches from his own. His regular sized face. Not a giant one. Which meant...he’d somehow shifted back to his normal self while bawling his eyes out. “Y-you di-didn’t ask why I-I-I was sor-sorry.” 

Remus made a clicking sound with his tongue, as he trailed his fingers down the back of Patton’s neck, eyes glittering. “Do you know why you were saying sorry?” 

Patton blinked, mouth half open with no idea what to say, his mind racing as he raised a shaking hand to scrub at his wet cheeks. There was...it was hard to explain! “I…” 

Remus chuckled. “Then it’s sewage under the bridge, Patters. I don’t need to know why. You just needed to know I accept. Right? Make you feel better?”  

He...he did feel a little better. “I--but--that--” Patton growled, shaking his head. “Tha-that’s not how apologies work!” 

“Says who? Cus they’re wrong.” Remus winked. “Besides I got to see your rosy cheeks and it was well worth the wait.” He met Patton’s eyes before deliberately looking down. 

Patton looked down as well and squeaked, practically throwing himself off of the Duke’s lap, knocking the paint covered paper to the ground in his desperation to grab a blanket to wrap around his waist, ears burning as Remus collapsed in a fit of giggles, his own--his own...rosy cheeks just as exposed as Patton’s had been. “WHY ARE WE NAKED?!” He demanded, voice cracking.

Sure he’d felt his glasses and hoodie fall from him when he’d changed into the tiny frog, but he hadn’t realized the rest of his--He shuddered again feeling Remus’s tongue against his bare back. No wonder it had been so--but he was human again! He should be wearing clothes! He’d had his outfit unmarred after he’d changed back from being that monster frog! 

Remus rolled to his side and Patton flushed harder, looking away, pulling the blanket up to his neck, getting a wift of lemons as he did so. 

“Never changed into an animal before have you?” He remarked, a wicked grin crossing his face. “Clothes can’t shift with you when you do that. You just leave them behind.” He pointed to his own pile of clothes on the paint covered floor.  

Patton gulped, twisting the blanket in his hands. “But Deceit!”

“Shifts between people.” Remus waved a hand dismissively. “That’s different. People wear clothes. You’ve never seen him change into a snake in front of you have you?”  No….but! ”But that-- my clothes! Earlier! I kept--”

Remus raised an eyebrow as he rolled off the bed, heading leisurely to his closet. “Were you a real frog earlier?”

Patton paused, mouth half opened. He--he--well they had been in a video game formant at the time he’d--he’d changed. Did...did that not count?

“Thought not.” Remus reemerged, thankfully wearing a tank top and very very short shorts as he tossed a wad of fabric at Patton’s head, the clothes vanishing just before hitting him only to reappear on his body. 

If he hadn’t done cloth swaps before with the...with everyone else before, that would have been---Patton shoved the thought from his mind, drawing in a shaky breath, reluctantly lowering the blanket to see just exactly what Remus had dressed him in. 

His fingers brushed over the black tank top with a picture of a kraken wrapped around a broken ship, to land on a pair of pajama bottoms that made it look like he had a multitude of tentacles instead of two legs.  

Remus gave him a critical once over before flopping back onto the bed. “Satisfied Mr. Monk? I’m sure that outfit won’t upset your delicate tastes too much.” He winked. “Though I can always dress you in something more--” he popped his lips.

It wasn’t his favorite get up... but it was much better than--than a lot of things he could imagine Remus wearing. Imagine Remus trying to get him to wear to get a reaction from him. Patton bit his lip, looking back up. “Why are you being so….nice? To me?” He whispered.

 Remus tilted his head at an unnatural angle to look at him, his eyebrows raised. 

There is no rhyme or reason to what I do, I just do.

Right. Patton flushed, looking away. Remus just...did things. Not just bad things apparently. Good things too. “Sorry. I just---no one…” He cut off as his voice cracked, blinking as his eyes began to burn again. “I...I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Recently. I--I thought you’d--” 

“Kick you while you were down?”

Patton bit his lip, pulling his knees up to his chest, grateful his tentacle patterned pj bottoms were pants instead of a pair of short shorts. “...Yah.” The Dark Side of Creativity liked doing things like that...didn’t he?

Remus twisted, shimming up to flop between Patton and the wall. “It was tempting.” He admitted, tapping a random pattern on Patton’s arm as he smoothed down his moustache with his other hand, “but considering you just cried hard enough to fill like twenty toilets--” He shrugged. “There’s only so many times you can kick a dead horse before it’s no longer fun. Seemed like you needed a breather from being hit.”

Patton swallowed over the lump in his throat as he relaxed his grip on his knees, turning his head to Remus. “Yah...I-I did.” 

Remus smirked. “As a frog though? You know there is this delectably bitter frog leg soup I’ve been itching to make and your legs--” He smacked his lips, eyes dancing with laughter as he stared at Patton. “Are quite shapely.”

And he thought his face couldn’t grow any hotter. At this rate he would give himself a sunburn from blushing so hard. “I--I-” 

Why did Remus have to go and say THAT. Despite his legs already being covered with his pants, Patton pulled the blanket back over them, hiding them from view. 

“Soo sensitive.” Remus teased, his feet prodding at Patton’s covered ones.

He was Feelings. He just--he pushed his feet against Remus’s, shoving them back. “I’m not used to--” 

“Ah yes.” Remus propped himself up on one elbow, rolling his eyes as his knee knocked against Patton’s calf. “Roman’s compliments are a bit more tame aren’t they? Something more boring about how you’re super sweet and like unto fields of flowers and being like the Sun and other trite drivel?” 

Patton bit his lip, a hollow pang echoing through his chest at the sound of Roman’s name. “...I don’t think he’ll be saying anything like that...to me….for a while.” Probably never again.

Remus froze for half a breath before he twisted, forcing his head between Patton’s chest and his legs so that he could use his stomach as a pillow. 

Roman used to do that. 

Patton swallowed over the lump in his throat, staring down at the Duke as he made himself comfortable. 

He should push him away. 

But at the same time...he--he missed...moments like this. Where it--it felt like someone wanted to be in his bubble. Wanted to stay near him. 

“I do love an unhappy story.” Remus remarked, bracing his feet against the wall as he gave Patton a feral grin that quickly softened as he stared up into his eyes. “But,” He raised a hand to brush at Patton’s wet cheeks, fingers coming away with flecks of paint on them as he dropped his hand to his lips, tongue flicking out to lick his fingers. “...I don’t think you should tell it tonight. A scab isn’t fun to pick at if it’s still fresh you know.” 

Patton bit his lip, blinking to keep his vision from blurring. “Right.” He managed to choke out. 

He didn’t know when this..this would not be fresh though. Would it ever...ever scab over if Roman--if Virg--Lo...if he was constantly left alone on the Light Side--

A warm hand again pressed against his cheek. “You’re welcome to stay, you know.” 

Patton drew in a shuddering breath, leaning into the Duke’s palm. “Huh?” He was...welcome? Here? 

“The night. For a breather. Be away from everyone. Seems like you need it. Though--” Remus’s eyes lit up with laughter as he gestured with his other hand around the low lit room. “I do only have the one bed.” 

Patton jerked, face burning as hot as the sun as he shoved Remus off him. “REMUS!” His voice shouldn’t sound that strangled. But. AH!

The Duke’s infectious laughter rang through the room as Remus rolled back to his spot between the wall and the bed, giving Patton as much space as he could on the twin sized bed. 

He may be more naive than the others in some aspects, but after finding some of the stuff that the Fanders had written about them...he--he--knew what that particular phrase could imply. “You could create another.” He said, once Remus’s laughter had died down to faint giggles, hating how high his voice still was. “You’re Creativity too!” 

“I could.” He easily agreed, shoulders still shaking with silent laughter. “but that’s not Fun. I wouldn’t be able to hear your breathing if you weren’t right here,” Remus dropped his voice seductively, smoothing down his moustache. “Next to me.”

If he got out of this room without getting third-degree burns from blushing Patton would be amazed. “I--I--stop it!” 

Remus tilted his head at that unnatural angle, his foot darting out to tap his toes again. “Stop what? You’re the one still here, Patters. On my bed. I haven’t tied you to it with fluffy handcuffs or anything though I could give you some. In your favorite shade of blue even.” He snickered. “Ooooooh, I’m sure I could make you squea--” He cut off as Patton shoved a pillow into his face.

He! He! Patton fell on top of the pillow, muffling his voice as he--he wasn’t sure if he was screaming or not, but AGH. Remus was--was so! So!!

An arm snaked around the pillow tapping Patton’s head before trailing down his neck. “Why haven’t you left?” Remus asked, his voice barely understandable through the pillow. He wiggled, the tip of his nose peeking out. “You can any time you know. I know you don’t like me, Pats. Don’t stay on my account.”  He--yah...he---he could leave. Should have left as soon as he realized he was again. Synced back to his room. To the light sides...to--to the loneliness. “If you know I--I don’t---lik--I haven’t been that--that good to you Remus. Why are you being nice to me?” Patton whispered reaching up to grab The Duke’s hand before it could trail further down his back. 

“Thomas is nice.” Remus said simply, going lax under him, his fingers twisting to squeeze Patton’s. “I’m just nice...differently.” 

He didn’t understand. Had never fully understood Remus nor his purpose. But this-- Patton tightened his grip. “Well it’s...I...I need nice right now. To feel--” Loved. Wanted. He trailed off, trying to keep his voice from wobbling. Was that pathetic of him? Wanting to stay when Remus was talking to him when no one else would? When he was instigating touch without Patton having to ask? “And..and you’re...you’re being nice...you hugged me and I just--” He cut off with a squeak as the pillow suddenly vanished, sending him right into Remus’s chest, the Duke’s arms wrapping around him in that too tight grip, fingers trailing through his hair.

“Let me hold you then.” Remus whispered. “If that’s what you need.” 

It was. He--he needed--Patton trembled, fingers gripping the Duke’s shirt as he pressed his face into his chest, breathing in the scent of lemons. “I’m sorry...it’s---”

Remus huffed a laugh into his ear, squeezing him tighter. “Apology accepted.” 

[jayeray-hq]

Is Tanaka Ryuunosuke a Domestic Deity? Or Dud?

Post Time Skip/Manga Ending Spoilers!

Warnings: none all fluff

Choose your own ending platonic or romantic!

Domestic Diety? or Dud? Masterlist — Character Masterlist

Can He Cook?

“What’s this?” you asked surprised, as you walked into the house. You’d been working really hard lately, and desperately needed a break. Your boyfriend had noticed, and invited you to come over for dinner, movies and some cuddling, which had sounded spectacular. You’d honestly been looking forward to it all day.

However, when you made it over to his place you were taken aback by the sight of Tanaka as he entered the doorway wearing an apron that read ‘kiss the cook’. It honestly looked like something he’d probably stolen or borrowed from Saeko, but it was surprisingly cute.

When he’d said dinner, you’d fully expected he meant ordering something from somewhere, pizza, takeout, something along those lines. Never in a million years would you have guessed he was going to cook dinner himself. It just hadn’t even occurred to you that he could cook, he just didn’t seem the type. However, judging by the rather lovely smell in the air he could, and rather well at that.

“Did you make dinner?” you asked, unable to help yourself as he ushered you in with a quick hug and a beaming grin, too surprised by it all to not give voice to the question even if the answer was obvious

“Yeah, you’ve been busy and probably eating nothing but junk, so I figured you could use a nice home-cooked meal,” he admitted sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head.

“You didn’t have to go to all the trouble,” you told him, honestly touched that he’d been thinking of you, “But thank you. It smells amazing

“Nothing but the best for my girl!” he told you fervently, a pleased grin on his face.

“I didn’t know you knew how to cook?” you prompted leadingly as the two of you made your way to the kitchen, curious beyond measure.

“Ah well, Saeko-nee said every man should learn how to look after himself, before going out on his own,” he admitted with a chuckle and a sheepish look in your direction as he added, “Said it wasn’t fair to expect a girlfriend or a wife to do all the work and that I should do my own fair share.”

“That sounds like her,” you admitted with a fond smile for the brash, fierce woman, someone you’d met quite frequently and respected and admired a lot for basically raising your boyfriend on her own, “She’s pretty amazing.”

“I guess,” Tanaka admitted, though there was a fond smile on his lips that belied the bland statement, “Anyway, are you hungry? I made plenty!”

The two of you sat down together to enjoy the meal he’d created, and while you were a bit nervous at first, the first bite was enough to sell you on his cooking ability. It wasn’t perfect by any means, a few bits over done here and there, but nothing inedible and most of it quite good.

Enough so that you teased he’d have to cook for you more often. He accepted the challenge with a beaming smile of pride, and told you he’d gladly cook for you any time you liked. Overall it was a fun and delicious experience and you got to learn something new about your sweet boyfriend.

7/10 He Can Cook and Does it Pretty Well!

Can He Clean?

You grimaced a bit as you stared around your boyfriend’s apartment, trying to decide what you wanted to do. Tanaka had recently given you a key to his place, inviting you to come over whenever you felt like it, and you’d decided to take him up on the offer and surprise him. In hindsight this might not have been your best idea.

In your defense you hadn’t realized your boyfriend was a slob, as his apartment had always been immaculately clean when you’d come over before. It made a lot of sense though if you thought about it, of course he cleaned before you came over.

A quick glance around showed it wasn’t too terrible. Sure there were things out of place, a few dirty dishes, and clothing generally strewn about everywhere, but it wasn’t horrible. There weren’t any gross odors or any mold or such that looked like it might become sentient like you’d heard in some of your friends’ horror stories.

Yes, the garbage was overflowing and clearly needed to be taken out, but on the bright side it could be worse. There wasn’t anything that couldn’t be fixed in an hour or two. With that bolstering thought in mind, you immediately set to work, figuring he’d appreciate it at least.

Part way through your cleaning your boyfriend came home. The poor man froze in the doorway glancing between you and his untidy apartment with horror written all over his face.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” he babbled, dropping his bag in the doorway and dashing quickly through his apartment, hastily gathering things that had been strewn about, obviously trying to do a quick clean as he kept babbling, “It’s such a mess! I should’ve cleaned! You don’t need to do that!”

You found his frantic actions rather endearing, and couldn’t help smiling at him as you assured him, “Ryuu, it’s okay, calm down! It’s not that bad I promise!”

“But!” He protested, his arms full of dirty laundry, a dubious expression on his face.

You cut him off with a quick peck to the lips, one that set him blushing and stuttering as usual when you caught him off guard with sweet gestures as you told him, “Don’t worry about it! Let’s get things cleaned up together and then we can hang out and watch movies and cuddle or something okay?”

He immediately agreed, willing as ever to go along with whatever you wanted. You’d said you’d clean together, but it immediately became obvious he was giving you all the easy tasks, something you found incredibly endearing. He rushed around with an almost frantic energy, clearly ready to do anything and everything to ensure you were comfortable in his space.

With his help it didn’t take long before the apartment was completely clean and fresh again, and the two of you settled in for a relaxing date night, comfortable and happy.

5/10 He’s a bit of a slob, but he’ll happily clean-up for you and with you!

Average Score?

6/10 Tanaka is neither deity or dud but sits in the comfortable middle of just above average!

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[barbasbodaciousbeard]

Bring your Daughter to Court Day and Dad Friends

Summary: Rafael tries to multitask, miscommunicating the date he direly needs a sitter to Lucia, which means Catalina has to accompany him to court last minute. He manages to maintain his serious demeanor as well as he can, rewarding the well behaved little one with ice cream and a trip to the park. Suddenly, Rafael realizes he doesn’t have dad friends, and the opportunity arises to gain one. 

Pairings: Rafael Barba x OC

First Part - Second Part -Third Part - Fourth Part - Fifth Part - Sixth Part

A/N: This installation also partially based off of @teamsladsandgents​ ask a couple weeks ago that Down A Sitter was based on.

How had his mother forgotten she was supposed to babysit? Apparently, it was because Rafael Barba sent March 18 instead of 8, probably while he was making Catalina’s lunch and thinking that was the time for an email. Now, his mother was in Florida with Enrique, and he was without a sitter because Rebecca, Al, and Rodney were on the trip together. He could probably take her to Olivia’s, have Lucy watch her, but there wasn’t time to do that and make it to the courthouse. Lucia lived too far away. That left him with one option, and it was one he wasn’t sure he liked.

It was another defense case, a pillar of the community who killed his daughter’s abuser. It was all heat of the moment; the bastard had shown up on his step looking for Brendon’s daughter, the one he’d raped and left nearly dead. The other women? The ones he hadn’t dated? They hadn’t been lucky enough for the nearly. In minutes, he’d shot him, calling the police on himself. Olivia had convinced him to take it. And now it looked like he’d have company.

“Mija, how good can you be if papi brings you to work?” Her eyes lit up as she looked up at him.

“I can be so good, papi! I’ll help.”

“I’d just need you to be very, very quiet. That’ll be the best.”

“But I want to help.”

“You have to protect papi’s briefcase,” he fibbed, thankful selective defense work meant he just needed the file within it.

“I can,” she nodded seriously. He fastened her into her car seat, kissing her forehead and getting to the courthouse. He was grateful he could transition the necessities to a less full suitcase, leaving behind spare pens and pads of paper and only taking the file, a couple of pens, snacks, a bottle, the ipad, and her coloring book and box of crayons. Consolidating made him feel less messy. Most people at the courthouse didn’t know the dad side of him, and even as he relaxed, he hadn’t quite shaken the reputation he earned as a prosecutor. Now, he was clad in one of his dark three piece suits with a bright tie and suspenders, just like everyone was used to, the same briefcase in his hand. What they weren’t used to was the little girl with his eyes settled on his hip, clad in bright pink leggings and a white sweater with her arms wrapped tight around her father’s shoulders.

“Can I help you with something?” he asked, brow raised as he shifted Catalina to walk through the metal detector. Her blanket was clutched in her hand from the car still, and she held it from the floor, carefully walking through.

“Cute kid,” the guard asked. This was one who’d been here forever, and he seemed surprised. 

“Thank you.” He picked Catalina up again, briefcase by his side. He’d developed more muscle definition in his arms than he’d ever had since Rebecca went back to work. Catalina refused to walk, and he enjoyed fatherhood too much to make her. 

“If you’re good until we leave, we’ll get the biggest sundae you’ve ever had, mija,” he reminded her during an empty stretch of hallway. Catalina nodded seriously up at him, and he smiled more fondly than he intended, nodding to his client. He’d sent a text of warning, but the older man just gave him a grin.

“Taylor was a daddy’s girl too. Thank you, Mr. Barba. I know you could have tried to continue this.”

“I don’t want to draw this out for you anymore, I assure you. If it means unorthodox company, so be it. We may be waiting for a while.” 

He settled the coloring book on his briefcase, and Catalina sat on the bench beside it, using it like a makeshift desk. He entrusted Brandon to watch her while he stepped to the clerk.

“How long is the wait running for The People vs Aerie?” he asked, and he remembered why he didn’t like this one.

“Who’s the cutie?” she asked, popping her gum as she slowly looked at the docket.

“I asked a question,” he said impatiently. He didn’t want this day to be about his child. He wasn’t even sure he liked sharing her with work. The divide, save the friendships he’d made, was too deep. Fin, Amanda, Liv, and Carisi were one thing. Everyone else? He was fine without them. 

“Geeze, I’m just wondering if she’s your niece or somethin’. It’s hot seeing a man with a kid.”

“She’s my daughter. Her mother is out of town and there was miscommunication with the sitter.”

“I didn’t know you were married, counsellor.”

“Please just give me an estimate.”

“Couple hours. I’ll bump you as far up as I can.”

“Thank you.”

He turned to see Catalina chatting happily to Brandon, and he thought it might be a blessing she was here. Brandon hadn’t been handling things well. Sure, he was handling things better than Rafael had; he let his wife and daughter be there for him. But he was also treating himself as less worthy now, grappling with the reality that he’d ended a life even if he didn’t regret doing it. He’d confided in Rafael as they prepped that he worried he was never going to be good again. That’s when Rafael did something that confirmed the change in him: he was vulnerable with him. They talked about something not many people had in common. Ending a life changes you, and though they did it for different reasons, both felt they’d done what they needed. 

“She’s smart as hell,” Brandon chuckled, watching Catalina color. “And looks exactly like you.”

“I’m very fortunate. Her, not so much,” he joked, hand resting on her back as he sat back down so she was between the pair of them. 

“Cute co-counsel,” Carisi said, stopping by. 

“Mr. Sonny!” Catalina grinned, and Rafael almost grinned. Carisi, while Rafael would always give him hell, attended their church, was overall a good guy and attorney, and had become one of Catalina’s chosen few during playdates with Jessie and Billie Rollins. He’d even been babysitter one Saturday night to give Rebecca and Rafael a night off, so he was developing soft spot for the young ADA. 

“Cat!” he grinned, leaning down and hugging her. Catalina didn’t let go, and Sonny put his briefcase down to hold her for a minute. “What are you doing here?”

“Protecting papi’s briefcase!” Catalina spoke well for her age, but he was going to miss the staccato of her toddler chatter. Carisi and the abuelitas and the squad could all understand her easily. They all had enough experience with kids. There had always been a delay between her words and his replies at first. Words would break up or run together, and he’d have to process things. Now it didn’t matter how she strung the noises together; he got it as easily as Rebecca.

“Wow, big responsibilities, kiddo. I gotta go to court. I’ll see you soon, okay?” he grinned, ruffling Catalina’s hair before she climbed back to the bench and leaned against Rafael. He was proud that his daughter hurried to his side when she wanted protection from the strange place and people around them. It made him feel like he was doing something right. The clerk, as annoying as she was, did get them moved up, and Rafael carried Catalina in, setting her on the bench directly behind his seat. After a few moments, she got nervous, standing and leaning against the bannister as everyone got settled. Rafael quietly urged her to sit as everyone settled in, looking over the file before him. She didn’t, looking around at the busy courtroom, and he set his mouth in a line, picking her up and fighting the urge to smile as her arms wrapped around his shoulders and her head came to rest on his shoulder.

“Do you need a continuance, Mr. Barba?” the judge asked. He’d been in front of this judge before. Last time, it was as a prosecutor in the Martha Hobbs case. He supposed that was why there was a tone of amusement in his voice. There goes whatever reputation he had left, but it didn’t bother him like he expected. 

“Not at all,” he said breezily. Suddenly, he realized he’d perfected that parental stance. The one where fingers laced around the toddler on his hip, but he could still take back a hand to turn pages and write notes. He’d always thought it was some kind of magic when Liv did it with Noah. “Shall we move ahead with Mr. Aerie’s arraignment?”

“Of course. Nothing unusual here.” Rafael fought the urge to roll his eyes, cutting his eyes to the ADA for this case covering a laugh. He was just glad it wasn’t Carisi this time.

“He’s weird,” Catalina whispered, well aware of how to keep her voice quiet enough only her father could hear her. He squeezed her gently, the corner of his mouth tugging up. Soon enough, Brandon was being escorted to pay bail, and Catalina had commented on the whole affair. She’d done much better than he’d expected, so he knew he’d be taking her for ice cream. His biggest worry had been the courtroom with it’s crowded benches, but she’d settled in just fine on his hip. 

It was still strange to him the way he could be a source of comfort for her, and he felt the weight of responsibility in the best way. She trusted him implicitly, looked for him when she needed comfort. Sure, she’d leave his side for a friend, but she’d always want to come back and climb onto his lap. It struck him again how unimaginable his father’s behavior was. In fact, he’d thought about it a lot as he took care of Catalina, especially the past few days with Rebecca gone. His first instinct with her was never anger. Occasional frustration with a tantrum, but she was learning to understand the world and needed him to make some part of it safe and consistent, not scary and volatile.

“Bye Mr. Aerie,” she said softly as they parted ways, Brandon’s wife ecstatic to get him home. Taylor was still in the hospital, and they’d be spending the night by her side. This case made him wish he could keep Catalina with him forever, safe from the kind of people he’d seen in his tenure at SVU. She wrapped around his knees on the steps of the courthouse as he answered questions. Media moved on, and they didn’t want to examine him anymore. They just wanted the statement and to follow Brandon into the waiting car. He would’ve held his daughter close, but he didn’t want her face plastered on the news. Rafael didn’t leave the Aeries until the SUV’s door closed, Catalina’s hand held in his. Once they were gone, he scooped her up and started towards the ice cream parlor he knew was only a couple of blocks away.

“You were very good today, mija,” he smiled gently, kissing the top of her head. “I think we ought to go for a walk and get you some ice cream.”

“Really?” she asked, and her smile was wide enough he could not say no if he wanted.

“Really,” he nodded, laughing as she pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“Gracias, papi!”

A long time ago, he would have tried to maintain the composure and seriousness from inside the courthouse until he was far from where anyone could see him this relaxed. Now he was adjusting his briefcase, as his daughter told him all about what she wanted on her ice cream. She wouldn’t take a nap that afternoon after the amount of sugar he was about to give her, but he had a feeling the grin he’d get, her face covered in melted chocolate and ice cream, would be worth it.

“Ms. Olivia!” Catalina’s voice made him follow her gaze, seeing Liv making her way to the courthouse. 

“So that’s how you got Brandon moved up the docket.”

“I added a one to the date when I texted mami to babysit while Becs is gone,” he said, mouth set in a line again. He didn’t like the fact this story was both unavoidable and going to be told forever.

“So Cat got to come to court?”

“Al and Rodney are with Becs. Mami is in Florida.”

“I was so good,” Catalina said proudly. “And Mr. Brandon got bailed.”

“Recognizance didn’t work?” she asked.

“He has the means to flee. But the bail is minimal. We’re going to get ice cream.”

“Because I was so good,” Catalina added, face serious as she nodded.

“You were, mija. Say bye to Oliva.” 

Soon, they were sitting at a table in the ice cream shop, and there was far more ice cream in front of Catalina than Rebecca would ever approve of. He’d originally said one scoop, any toppings, but then she asked with wide eyes if she could get three flavors. Normally, he’d try to say no, but not today. She’d been good at the courthouse, plus he was the one she inherited her sweet tooth from. They’d gotten four scoops and every topping she wanted with an agreement she’d share with papi. He’d almost teared up when she said I always share with papi. Almost. But now he was taking a picture of them together, trying to decide how much he hated that he took selfies now. But, he only took selfies like this, of him sitting in a low booth with Catalina beside him and the massive sundae between them. Surely, that didn’t count? He sent it to Rebecca anyway.

Guess who was an angel in court. We miss you, mami.

Certainly not the hot one. Proud of her. I miss you both terribly.

What time do you get home tonight?

Eleven. The boys are dropping me off. And I’m guessing that sugar means you’ll both be up.

I’ll be up either way. Te amo, hermosa. I hope the trip has been good to you.

I love you, handsome. It has been, but I miss my family.

“Should we video call mami when we get home?” he asked when sticky hands had been cleaned as they walked back to the car. He saw familiar faces passing them by, giving nods as they approached the courthouse they’d parked near. 

“Yeah!” she nodded eagerly, and Rafael could see the energy hitting her. 

“Or maybe we call her from the park? Then you can play! Run around and swing and slide.” He was humming each activity, pressing kisses to the top of her head. He hadn’t taken her to Central Park yet, and he’d been to the Billy Johnson Playground on the east side with Olivia and Noah when she’d needed a friend. It looked like an old part of the nature around it, making him think of the stories Catalina was so fond of. She liked gnomes and cottages in the woods lately, and the little park fit right in. Plus, the focus was more on what she could run on and climb, but still with the swing he could push her on when she got tired. When she did get tired, he could rest with her at the little gazebo and feel secluded and out of the city.

Maybe they needed a vacation.

“Yes!” she giggled, hugging his neck. He smiled, stopping at the car to order an Uber. To and from court was all the driving he intended to do. He traded his briefcase for the diaper bag, leaving his vest and blazer now that the day had warmed up and tucked one of the blankets Rebecca insisted was in case of emergency in the diaper bag. 

“We’re going to a really special park.”

“Why’s it special?”

“You know the pretty one the zoo is at?”

“Yeah?”

“Papi knows a cool playground there. It looks like gnomes live there.”

“That is cool,” she said, her excitement apparent. He loaded them into the car, ever grateful to not have to drive, and tipped generously when the driver was kind enough to drop them off away from the zoo. As soon as they were in the park, Catalina wanted down, her hand in his as they walked along the path.  When they got to the little gazebo, he stopped, and Catalina looked up at him quizzically.

“Want to call mami from here?” She lit up, pulling herself to stand on the bench he sat on. Rebecca was packing up, he knew, so he wasn’t surprised when she answered quickly, blowing her hair from her face. When she fully registered it was them, she grinned. 

“Mama!” 

“Catalina!”

“Becs!”

“Raf!”

Rebecca was relieved to see the day really must be going well. Catalina was giddy, blue from what Rebecca guessed was cotton candy ice cream staining the cuff of her sweater as she pushed her hair back. Rafael was smiling, the one that showed his teeth and crinkled his eyes. They still hadn’t been home, but the image of Rafael in the dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up, his tie and suspenders featuring the same shade of pink as their daughters pants was perfection. She wasn’t sure he realized how often he did it, but she didn’t want him to stop matching their daughter so she’d never tell. 

“You guys seem like you’re having fun! Maybe it’s good papi can’t type.” This time Rafael laughed because he was kind of thankful for his snafu. This weekend was only his third or fourth time out and about with Catalina for more than a trip to the park or run to the grocery store. This weekend, they’d gone to a museum and church on their own, and now they were having another daddy daughter day. He liked it. 

“Papi and I had...lunch....that wasn’t ice cream. And now we’re at a special playground!”

“The Billy Johnson Playground at Central Park. I’ll take pictures for you, mami.”

“You two will have fun. You’ll have to show it to me one day.”

“Secret park!” Catalina said seriously and his smile grew broader, arm around her middle. 

“Maybe we can show mami this part before?”

“Deal.” They said their goodbyes soon enough, Rebecca heading to the airport. He watched as Catalina walked just a couple of steps ahead, looking back over her shoulder to be sure he was there. Her eyes lit up when she saw the park, and Rafael was glad to see there were other kids her age there. They hadn’t quite found her a group of friends her own age; Fin’s grandson, Jaden, was one of only a couple, and Rafael didn’t know the other two well. He stayed close to her as she hurried to the climbing set, taking pictures and sending them on to Rebecca. Mostly, moms and nannies were there, and he felt slightly out of place. When he was in groups of parents, he always found himself wondering who knew. Shifting awkwardly, he nodded towards them and went back to watching his daughter with a fond smile.

She’d found two sisters, one her age and one who looked to be about five. The older girl was helping the younger two navigate the playset, leading them to slides and climbing nets easily. Each time Catalina looked unsteady on her feet, which was often given her age, he wanted to scoop her up, but apparently it was important to let her take a tumble or two. Rafael didn’t like that idea or the fact that they had to keep bandages in the diaper bag. Luckily, the time she did fall, landing on her rear with her legs out, the older of her new friends laughed and helped her up. 

“I’m guessing white sweater is yours?” a man asked, and he chuckled. 

“Yeah.”

“Her new friends are mine. Flower pants and leopard dress.”

“They made friends fast.”

“Is she into princesses and fairy tales?”

“Yeah. Especially gnomes right now?”

“Sarah is my eldest. She’s obsessed with Fairies.”

“Makes sense. Catalina like fairies too.”

“She and Megan look the same age?”

“Two and a half?”

“Right on,” he chuckled. “I’m Hank.”

“Rafael. I think we’re the only dads here today.”

“Yeah. It’s normally just me during the day when we’re here. I’m a writer, so I can stay home while my wife’s at work. You’re all dressed up though. I’m guessing this isn’t your normal day?”

“I’m an attorney, but I work from home.”

“How does that work?” 

“I work with the Innocence Project. Meetings with defendants are Mondays. I can do the paperwork and brief writing from home. Then court when needed. I take defense work on occasion, like today. Sitter fell through so Cat had to come. My girlfriend is a teacher, and she snuck off with her friends for a long weekend.”

“My wife’s a school librarian. We picked those educators, huh?”

“Apparently.” It felt so normal to be talking to him, and Rafael thought to himself maybe he could have a dad friend now. His friends from Harvard and the DA’s office and SVU had kids, but they’d always have been work colleagues first. There was no erasing what they’d seen together, the tension over cases, the Householder case. Hank seemed nice enough, and they had similar lives. At least they could team up on park trips since it turned out their usual stomping grounds overlapped. 

God, Hank looked like a writer though. He had on a thick flannel over a t-shirt, and tattoos peaked out of the rolled up sleeves. Slim fit jeans and black sneakers, the cool kind not the functional kind, just rounded it out. He was tall and lanky and younger than him, and Rafael suddenly felt he could be Catalina, Megan and Sarah’s grandfather. Hell, he technically could. Still, he was new to this, and he supposed most men in their fifties weren’t settling down with a partner for the first time and raising their first child. Besides, Hank was probably still a little older than Rebecca.

“Megan scraped her knee,” Sarah said, running over to the two men, followed by Catalina holding the hand of teary Megan. 

“Shit-”

“Dad, that’s a bad word.”

“Shoot,” Hank corrected. “I forgot the bag.”

“I’ve got bandages. Princess ones,” Rafael said, digging the box from the diaper bag. “There’s neosporin in there too.”

“Thanks.” 

Catalina climbed on Rafael’s lap, and he could tell by how she laid back against him that he had succeeded; she was tired out. Rafael didn’t want to go yet, able to hear Hank saying they’d head home once Megan was patched up. Was making friends as an adult always so much like asking for a girl’s number was when he was younger? He hadn’t been a dad for long, only a few months. Maybe having someone other than Rebecca he could call during tantrums and long days would be good?

“Hey, before everyone heads out, maybe we can all meet at the park again sometime? The girls seemed to really get along.”

“Yeah, that sounds good,” Hank said, digging out his phone and handing it to Rafael. “Put your number in. I haven’t made many dad friends who aren’t also writers or don’t have traditional office jobs. We’re both basically house husbands.”

“Yeah. And it’s hard.”

“Easier than it was two years ago though, right? Five’s even easier.”

“I actually only found out I was a dad in December. It’s a long story. But it’s easier now than in January.”

“We’ll delve into that at the park later this week?”

“Perfect. Do you take insurance?”

“As long as you’ve hit your deductible. Send me the pictures of the girls, okay?”

“Will do,” he nodded as they walked towards the sidewalk. He’d ordered an Uber to take he and Catalina back to his car. Soon enough, he was cooking her dinner, watching her dance around the kitchen to the soft jazz he was playing, and Rafael was grateful for the break from Disney. Not having Rebecca’s return each evening made him appreciate even more how much she’d had to do to keep their daughter happy and healthy and safe for the last two years. He needed the time he’d had to heal, but he often wished he could go back and be here to help sooner. It was his own fault. Instead of pressing the guilt down like he used to, he let himself acknowledge it, tucking it to the side instead as he settled a bowl of macaroni in front of Catalina. Once she was tucked in, he put his feet on the coffee table, working on his laptop and only pausing to send Hank the pictures he’d snapped of the girls playing. He heard Rebecca at the door at eleven, just like she’d estimated, and he hurried to meet her. 

“Heya, handsome,” she grinned, and Rafael could feel the stupid grin split his face.

“Welcome home, hermosa,” he beamed, pulling her in and kissing her deeply. 

“Missed me?” she teased as she smoothed his hair.

“Terribly,” he nodded. “I’ve been spoiled to see you every day.”

“It seems like you and Cat had a good time though?”

“Yeah. We went to the Children’s Museum Saturday. Then Sunday was mass and lazy movies. Today was hectic, but good.”

“Yeah? You two seemed happy at the park. And ice cream for lunch.”

“We had a lot of fun at the park. She made friends with two girls, Sarah and Megan. They have a playdate Thursday.”

“Oh yeah?” she chuckled. “You finally click with the playground moms?”

“Hank. He’s a writer, and his wife is a school librarian. His girls are two and five. He’s home with them most of the time.” Rebecca couldn’t help but grin at how he tried to pretend it was just convenient. 

“That’s cool. I bet it could be nice talking to non-police or court affiliated people, hm? Maybe you two could grab a beer sometime.”

“We’ll see. He’s surprisingly nice to talk to. Sarah and Megan have the same tantrums.”

[infinitegalahad]

YOUR PROMPTS ARE OPEN!!!! 🥳🥳🥳 im so excited this time has come! you know i'll probably send a few but for my first i'd like to request #'s 33 and 50 from the fluff prompts with my dear shifty, of course. mucho love 2 u!

A LITTLE PIECE OF HOME

Summary: Before your childhood friends Popeye and Shifty are shipped out, Popeye brings his new camera and decides to make some last minute memories. 

Word-Count: 1.9k 

Prompts: “can i keep it, the photo of us?” and “look at me.”

A/N: pearl, my love, my life-HI! your little request was beyond fun to write! this piece is short and sweet in (hopefully) all the right places-anything for you! shifty is our sweet sunshine boy and it was a pleasure to write for you. i hope you request more prompts soon my love-thanks you for being there for me. your messages always brighten my day. i hope you enjoy ❣️✨ 

Masterlist | Send In A Prompt!

It was the perfect day outside. In Virginia, it felt like summer all year round. But today was different-it was absolutely gorgeous. The sun shined bright as the heat burned down on your exposed shoulders with the sun making your skin become pink. The day seemed too perfect for it to end so soon.

You, Darrell, and Robert had been friends since the three of you were in diapers. You all grew up in a small tight-knit town; living down the same dirt road that went for miles on end, going to the same Sunday church and packed diner for pancakes and milkshakes, walked all over the train tracks, the three of you were conjoined at the hip. Wherever they went, you went with them.

Robert was the one who brought the group together. In second grade, Robert and Darrell had been playing during recess one day and saw you, sitting all by yourself with tears coming out of your big eyes and your hair and dress all covered in dirt. Darrell saw you and ran over. He didn’t know you, but he hated seeing other people sad-so not only were you crying, but Darrell burst into loud sobs, followed by Robert. When you had stopped crying, Darrell and Robert took you to their little play corner and got wet clothes, rubbing the dirt from your face. The boys in your school had been teasing you and kicked dirt in your direction, messing up the outfit your mama had made for you. While Darrell attempted to “make you pretty” again, he asked for your name and asked if you had any friends. Once you told him your name and that you had no friends, he said that he and Robert were your new friends from now on.

And they truly were.

Now the three of you we’re in your twenties-still living in that small town in Virginia. Each of you had changed in appearance. Popeye grew into his round-face, his thin hair receding, but his dimples and slurred accent still remaining the same. Shifty, well to you-he was handsome. He hadn’t changed one bit, but every day he got even more handsome to look at it. He grew from the sweetheart who cried with you in second grade to the boy who offered to take you platonically to prom since nobody was “in their right mind” to do so. The boy with the sun-tanned skin and comforting smile was your best friend and the love of your life. But how could you tell him? Almost every girl wanted him. Bless their hearts, but he was too shy for his own good-and so were you. Considering your experience with men, you decided it was best if you and Shifty would stay friends. The two of you had done some for nearly a decade. But as you got older, it got harder to contain those feelings. Whenever you looked at him, you felt like you were going to throw up your heart.

The three of you all believed that you would live in this town for the rest of your lives and until you were all old and real adults. But that all changed in an instant.

Robert and Shifty had signed up for the Paratroopers and we’re being shipped out to Toccoa early next morning. They had broken the news to you last night at Shifty’s house with his poor Ma, breaking into tears. Just like his ma, Shifty’s big eyes began to burst into tears, which made everybody cry. Whenever he got emotional, it always reminded you of a younger and more innocent Shifty, the one that never missed a single shot and loved nature. Your one, true friend who you could tell anything to, the one who knew your small quirks and deepest secrets. The one man that you loved more than anything in the world that was now slipping through your fingers.

In that very field you sat in, you stayed silent most of the time. Shifty had his rifles slung over his shoulders, donning light blue overalls as he and Popeye walked around, casually conversing about being Paratroopers. You hide behind the tall grass, slowly picking the petals off of a bright daisy, muttering to yourself. You watched his every move; his lips moving with a smile, his smooth skin glittering in the sun, and his chocolate brown hair becoming golden in the bright sun.

You had become so lost in your own little world that you didn’t even notice Shifty, standing right next to you. He poked your shoulder and saw you looked up with a confused face, progressing your surroundings.

“Y/n? You okay?” He asked, bending down with his hands on his knees. “You’ve been awfully quiet.”

You looked up and subtle smiled to cover up your sadness. “I am, Darrell. Just a little sleepy.”

Darrell held out a free hand in front of your face, “Well, you wanna with me just a little?

You silently responded and took his hand, which lingered for longer than you wanted it to. His hands had been so worked, his skin remained as soft as silk. His fingertips finessed against your palm. The two of you walked side by side as you walked side by side, the sounds of the wind blowing through the tall grass filling the silent void.

Darrell was a little concerned by your quiet behavior. You were normally very energetic about him and Robert, but you were as silent as a mouse today. It was your last time truly with him and for Robert for one month, one year, who knew how long they would be gone for. Darrell maybe would never see you again, the small town the two of you grew up in, your bright smile. He wanted to see that every single day; whether that be waking up to you in the morning or having a little piece of you overseas.

Darrell was very in touch with his emotions, unafraid to conceal them. His ma always taught him to be honest, and that’s what he did best. So when you were down, he had to fix it before it was too late.

“Y/n?” He said in a low tone, turning over to see you, unresponsive as you looked down at your fiddling hands. You were hurting, and it broke his heart to see what. “Can you tell me what’s bothering you?”

You were unresponsive as you kept your eyes down, your hands scrunching with the fabric of your flowy skirt. He had done nothing wrong-he never had done anything wrong to you ever. But it was hard to think that the next time you would hear from Shifty-it could be a military letter and announce that he had died a hero. Just another number in a never-ending war. And that you, a fool, never confessed how you felt to your childhood best friend.

Darrell stopped in his tracks and let out a soft sigh, tenderly grabbing your forehand to stop you as well. His free hand moved to the edge of your chin, gently tilting it sideways so you would make eye contact with him.

“Look at me,” Darrell politely requested, his voice shaky.

You followed his request and looked at him, seeing that he was fighting back tears. You weren’t the only one, which made you feel relieved and even sadder.

“Oh Darrell...you know if I start with my waterworks, you’ll be followed’ after,'' You remarked and let out a dry chuckle, masking the incoming tears. It was too late and a stray tear escaped from Shifty’s eye, his pink lips quivering as he was speechless.

Just like you had stated, two tears came from your eyes as you used a finger to wipe him away. “Told ya’ so. Look at us, just little kids.”

Darrell rested in your palm, rubbing against it like a cat would with a pillow. “Like it was yesterday. I remember washing the dirt from your cheeks so I could make you look pretty again. Don’t know why I ever said that-you still are pretty.”

You patted his cheeks as you lead his hands down into your own, squeezing them. Darrell and you stood in the open field, hands tangled with each other, the wind blowing against you as the grass tickled your bare feet. Not only did the humidity make you feel warm, but so did the growing heat in your cheeks.

“How do you tell someone you love them?” Darrell casually questioned to break the silence that was growing in the wind.

A smile crept on your face, “Just like your ma would say, you just gotta be honest with yourself.”

“Well, I think I love you. No, I don’t think. I know it.” Darell declared, holding your hands close to his chest. “I wanted to let you know. I didn’t wanna ever tell you.”

You tilted your heart and let out a dreamy sigh. “Oh, Darell...I…”

The sudden click and flash of a camera before blinded you and Shifty. You squint your eyes as they burned with flashes of white light as Shifty pulled you into his chest, his hands protectively resting on your lower back.

It was just Robert, holding his brand new camera over his eyes, his thin eyebrows raised and mouth wide open in shock. Instead of reacting, Shifty and you stayed close together, both red in the face along with Robert.

Robert took the photo out of the camera and shook it, tucking it into Shifty’s pocket. You opened your mouth to speak, but Robert beat you to it.

“I’ll leave you lovebirds to it,” Robert said as he turned around, walking away in a hurry, “I’ll see ya at the Power’s for supper-I hope.”

Once Robert had left, Shifty dug his fingers into his pocket to retrieve the photo. You leaned against his chest and observed the photo. Robert had caught the two of you in the middle of your confession, hands tangled as your eyes met. Both of you had smiles on your faces-and Darrell looked amazing-even if he was in black and white.

“That’s not a bad photo of you,” You complimented as you leaned into his nice smelling chest, “You looked handsome.”

“And you looked pretty-but you always do.” Shifty shot back, planting a kiss into your face. He observed the photo and then looked down at you to compare, a big smile appearing on his face like a child on Christmas morning. Shifty had found his answer, and it was not only right in front of him but in his fingertips.

“Can I keep it, this photo of us?” Darrell said in your hair as he shook the photo, “When I need a piece of home. I’ll give you my whole heart, anything you want, darlin’.”

You nodded your head, “Yes, you can. You don’t need to give me anything-but can I ask you something?”

“Yes, darlin’. Anything,” Darrell stated as he looked down at your adoringly. He looked like he wanted to give you the whole world in that moment, If he could have, he would have.

“We only got a night left together for a long time. Can we spend it all together? Just one night?”

Shifty flashed his bright smile and kissed each knuckle on your hand, leaving a small mark. “Yes ma’am.”

Once Shifty had neatly stored the cherished photograph of you into his breast project, the two of you grabbed each other's hands and walked down the gravel road, back to the Power’s residence for supper. You leaned against his shoulder, letting him lead you. Whenever Darrell had gone, you would follow along. You knew your last few hours together were short, but if it was your last time ever seeing Darell-you wanted to make the most of it.

[unfunny-quips]

Shouta had been sized up before. 

Many times during his life, in fact. As a student, as a hero, as a teacher. He’d always met the assessments with the same steady, unflinching gaze of his own. He knew his capabilities, and no amount of side eye or stare down would make him think twice.

That did not mean he was in any way prepared for Midoriya Inko. 

Nezdu’s assistant - soft spoken, unassuming, and sweet - had a way of making her scrutinizing gaze seem gentle as it swept over him. Her sharp eyes taking in every detail, weighing and measuring every fact she gathered. She always had a bright smile and a kind word, a gentle hand to guide when needed. And yet, somehow, she was one of the very, very few people Shouta had ever met that made him nervous.

It shouldn’t have been surprising, he supposed. For all the things he had faced down in his career, he had never faced true, unwavering evil the way she had. The green haired woman had been married to the single most dangerous man in Japan - very possibly the world - and had come out of the experience with her heart of gold intact. 

An impressive enough feat on its own merit. That she had managed to pull one over on that villain - gathering up her sons and a damning amount of information and sweeping them away to safety before All For One had even a chance to understand what was happening - that was terrifying. She’d stormed the police, stared down the Symbol of Peace himself, and forced the Hero Commision themselves to give her a deal placing her family in the highest amount of security available. 

Most terrifying of all, she had impressed Nezdu.

The woman was a force of nature and Shouta was smart enough to know he wouldn’t survive the storm if it’s ire was turned on him.

Midoriya herself, dressed disarmingly in a smart grey suit with a teal blouse, finally brought her gaze to meet his and offered him one of her cheerful grins. It was warm and soft, the kind of thing mothers gave he supposed, not that he had a terrible lot of familiarity with that. The gentleness of the smile did not make him forget the steel of her spine or how she could make that smile turn predatory when the need arose.

“Aizawa-San, it’s lovely to see you today!”  She greeted him, standing from her desk - immaculate and clearly organized to the height of perfection - and rounding it to greet him. 

He should have anticipated the crushing hug she’d pulled him into, but as always her unwavering cheerfulness had sent him off balance and she’d pressed her advantage before he could regain his senses. She did it with all the staff, with the exception of All Might and Nezdu. Aizawa suspected All Might’s great height - even in his skeletal form - prevented her from pulling him in for one of her crushing hugs. Nezdu, for his part, was a fellow apex predator and therefore exempt from such treatment.

He wished, not for the first time, that Zashi had come with him. He sometimes was able to hide behind the other man when Midoriya Inko started hugging. Sometimes. 

Then again, she’d sometimes just sweep the both of them up at once, and Zashi took it as an invitation for a group hug, trapping Shouta entirely.

“Midoriya-San.” He awkwardly greeted when she’d released him. She ignored his discomfort, and moved back towards her desk where a stack of papers waited.

“You’re just in time, I just finished compiling the pre-approved applications for the transfers. Oh!” She paused, turning away from her desk and darting through the door just off her office to the small kitchenette hidden there. He blinked after her, feeling bewildered, and watched as she moved to pull two bentos from the fridge. “I noticed your schedule today didn’t allow for lunch.” She told him, shoving one of the bentos into his hands. “So I thought we could enjoy a meal while we reviewed everything.”

He barely managed not to fumble the container as she dropped it in his hands, whisking off to sit at her desk before he could even think of refusing. He blinked after her, then turned to the bento. The fabric it had been tied into was a soft blue and printed with adorable chibi versions of Hizashi in fully hero gear. It was adorable and mildly terrifying to think she had noticed something in Shouta he thought he’d locked down and hidden away years ago.

“You didn’t have to, I have -” Any protest he might have made died the moment he glanced up and saw the sharp look in her eyes. She was still smiling, but there was a certain gleam of warning in her gaze as she looked at him.

“Protein pouches are not an appropriate substitute for a proper meal.” Midoriya said with the kind of finality that left no room for argument. Not that there would be any. Shouta certainly wasn’t going to be fool enough to pick a fight he knew he couldn’t win - more than once, at least. Especially not when she had that soft, warning expression pointed at him.

Instead he clamped his mouth shut and took the seat across from her, dutifully untying the knot in the colorful bento wrapping at her warning glance. Inside he found onigiri made to look like cats tucked in with a variety of protein rich, healthy foods and some apple slices cut to look like bunnies. 

It was adorable. 

How she managed to find time to make him something so elaborate and cute while balancing care for Izuku and Tenko, the running of the school and keeping up with Nezu while also being constantly vigilant for her villainous estranged husband was beyond him.

“Now there were a number of transfer requests made to get into 1-A” Midoriya began, glancing over the documents on her computer after she had ensured that Shouta was indeed eating the food she’d given him. “About two hundred total. Most of them were sifted out due to grades and overall performance which brought it down to sixty-two. From there we accounted for teacher evaluation to whittle it down to a more reasonable seventeen.”

She pulled up a list, tilting her screen to better show him the names and pictures of seventeen promising first years. Hitoshi, as expected, had made it through the initial two stages of the transfer process. Just two more stages to go.

“Interviews have been scheduled to speak to their classmates, friends and family. Nezdu suspects will have only seven or eight remaining afterward those have been conducted.” Midoriya explained, casting another warning glance at Shouta to ensure he was still eating the lunch she’d prepared for him. He dutifully began digging into a Tsukune. Satisfied, Inko unwrapped her own bento and allowed Shouta to review the short bios of the students as she ate her own lunch.

Each student he reviewed gave the impression of a serious hero course candidate. A class full of good students who hadn’t made the cut initially due to a system biased against their quirks. Nezdu expected nearly ten of them wouldn’t make the interview process, and Shouta didn’t doubt the principal’s estimate, he was rarely wrong about such things. Usually there were only three or four remaining after the interviews, it was an unusually adept group that year it seemed.

After the interviews would be the practicals, followed by the faculty review of those remaining. Despite his personal interest, Nezdu had permitted him to remain on the faculty board to judge the students, confident in Shouta’s ability to remain objective. 

“Oh, I nearly forgot,” Midorya said, breaking him from his thoughts. He watched as she set her lunch to the side and turned her attention to one of her desk drawers. “Izuku gave this to me to pass along to you. He was worried he wouldn’t have the chance otherwise with midterms coming up.” A plain file folder was held out to him, innocent looking.

Shouta squinted at it suspiciously. “He could have brought it in during my office hours.” He said, reaching for it anyway. He’d started calling Midoriya Izuku Problem Child in the first couple days of class, but in no way was the boy actually a troublemaker. Only over eager and overpowered with no sense of self protection. He was a good student, though, and a good kid from everything he’d seen and everything Hitoshi had told him. Not one he’d expect to use a go between for passing notes on to his teachers.

Midoirya Inko gave one of those knowing smiles that put Shouta’s hair on end. “I think he wanted to avoid taking any of your time that could go to other students for something that isn’t related to his own school work.”

Shouta blinked at that, then flipped the folder open and blinked again.

“Are these -?”

“Recommendation letters, yes.” Midoriya said, smile growing bright at Shouta’s bewildered expression. “Hitoshi-kun mentioned they’d help him during his application for the hero course so Izuku got some put together for him. I wrote one of my own, and All Might was similarly happy to make a recommendation based on what he’s seen of Hitoshi’s excellent character.”

[shit-posts-and-fanfictions]

Fandom: SCP

Rating: Angst/ Mature

Readers Gender: n/a, third-person

Present Characters: Dr. Bright, SCP-590 (TJ)

Trigger Warnings: Depression, attempted suicide, amnesia, forced mental disability, cursing, death by cutting, heavy derealization and depersonalization.

Notes: I been thinkin' about this a lot and my hand just happened to slip on the post button. Summed up, Dr. Bright has the day off and uses it to visit and spend time with his brother.

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This is a suicide fic, please don't read if this could affect you negatively

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At first, there was light, not welcoming, but all the same as it had been every morning; the only exception for today, being that he didn't have work. It was such a seldom occasion to have even a day to himself like this, sitting up and stretching before collecting clothing for the day and trudging into the bathroom.

He simply used a hand to clear a spot in the fog of the mirror examining his face wondering if his little brother would even recognize him- TJ was happy enough to have the company, but whether or not he had the mental capacity to understand who it was visiting him Jack was unsure... Dressing and not even bothering to put anything away as he left for the day.

~~~

The halls seemed longer than usual. Twisting in ways they should, curling in on itself and stretching to infinite lengths. Was there a breach? No, there were no alarms, no breaches or codes being called, and his fellow researchers walked the lengthy corridor just fine. Speaking of, he smiled half whimsically at them watching his odd behavior. Just Bright being Bright before he continued on his way to SCP-590's TJ's cell.

Jack was hesitant a moment before letting the door slide open and stepping inside the cell, the door falling shut as soon as he walked in. He watched his brother in the corner scribbling absentmindedly on paper humming a broken tune he'd made up himself; Jack glimpsed over the cell walls, taking in any new pictures hung up for display.

He called for his brother, "Tj..." Too quiet. "TJ." Cringing at how out of place his voice felt. Or his host's voice- tucking his amulet under his shirt to protect the younger boy from accidentally touching the object before greeting him with open arms after finally catching his attention. Tj looked at him with squinted eyes, tongue brushing his bottom lip thoughtfully before grinning "hello!" He slurred, racing over to happily accept the embrace. Jack giving a weak smile and humming softly "what're you drawing this time?" Letting his brother tug him along to the table he'd previously been sitting at.

They'd sat for a good few hours, Jack listening to his slurred speech and often not understanding what was stated, but going with it anyway. He'd done this- TJ could hold a conversation so well, but now his vocabulary was limited to basic words and phrases. Being so secluded to himself didn't help his vocabulary either... but nonetheless, Jack sat and listened to every butchered and mispronounced word he had to say, nodding along, laughing, and overall just having a good brother bonding. Sticking around for lunch and eventually leaving when he couldnt hold himself together anymore. Patting his brother on the head while he gave a disappointed pout "you come back?" He hummed, looking up to the stranger before him. "Of course i will, i always do" his brother still seeming upset "last man say that-" and Jack frowned. He said that, Jack said that. He had always been there- of course TJ couldn't understand anymore... turning abruptly and leaving as quickly as he could.

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He waited for the door to shut behind him completely before letting his body give out and collapsing against the cold metal. His legs buckled and he slid against the door to the floor slowly allowing sobs to rack through his chest, hiccuping between breaths trying to focus on anything- anything at all to calm his racing thoughts. But everything his blurred vision took in only reminded him more of what pained him. He did this- he had done this to his brother. Ruined his life right alongside his own; Oh why couldn't he just die?

When Jack had finally found the strength to stand, he stumbled to the bathroom, knocking his shoulder on the door frame and catching his balance on the counter. He needed a shower. His skin His host's skin felt uncomfortable. looking down at their hands felt wrong, mind spinning slightly out how unfamiliar he felt to himself. His hair, his eyes, his face, the sound of his own labored breathing was all wrong. He didn't even feel in control of himself anymore, watching from the back of his head mindlessly as they fumbled around the corner, momentarily staring at the razor he had used to shave his stubble this morning. His pinky poking at it thoughtfully, watching it move away from him before reaching for it entirely; Grasping it tightly before making his way to the tub and yanking the shower curtains out of the way only successfully riping them from the rod. Eventually, he settled into the cold porcelain-enameled steel, reaching forward to plug the basin and turn on the water. Cold, Hot, he didn't care. Clothes and all getting soaked as the water rose into his shoes, against his shins, and pooling against his stomach. He half hazardly pulled his tie loose from how hard breathing became, leaning back into the water till the liquid crept up his neck. He inhaled, staring at the ceiling, and for a moment felt blissfully in control.

He wasn't sure how long he'd been laying here, eventually craning his head to watch the water pour over the rim of the tub. His right hand still fiddling with the razor. He'd killed himself a few different ways. Today though, this felt right. Using his teeth to pull up the sleeve of his left arm, moving to trace the razor's blade against his skin, barely breaking the surface and leaving irritated lines in its wake. Eventually though, he pushed harder into the flesh, breaking skin and admiring the blood that dripped down his elbow and painted the water. Back and forth and back and forth, drawing lines deeper and deeper into the skin. He could tell when he hit an artery, shuddering in pain but continuing anyway. Jack only stopped when his vision blurred and his head spun wildly, losing grip on the razor and letting it sink into the tainted water, his arms dropping to his sides. He chuckled quietly, letting his head lull back while he fought the sudden exhaustion he felt. He tried keeping focus on the lights above his sink, watching them swarm between the original four, then eight, then four, then two, then as they blurred together as one and went dark. Letting himself momentarily slip into death's arms and rest at last.

~~~

At first, there was light, not welcoming, not like how it was described in near-death experience stories- It was painfully artificial, forcing Jack to close his eyes, moving to roll over as he recalled recent events with a sullen look. His senses were still coming back to him, blinking till his eyes focused enough, clenching hands till feeling came back to the unfamiliar skin, wading out the numb ringing in his ears till he could hear the vent above him hurdling cold air across the bed. He grimaced tasting nicotine on his new host's tongue, eventually pushing himself up to look around the room and sighing before starting the next day as he always had.

[xlovelybeanx]

✭ Here’s a little short fic I came up with at 1:30 at night, because... why not? (Upon finishing this story it’s now 2:27 - I ate food and I finished this “short” story. It actually turned out pretty long. Sorry.. hehe.)

✭Art belongs to @.patpaige as you can see in their logo. This artwork is amazing (<3).

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Title: “Tamaki vs. ...Eri and Mirio?”

Ship: Miritama ft. Eri

Summary: Amajiki is no good with kids, Eri finds out what tickling is and Mirio is somehow a great teacher. ... could be worse.

Warning: Tickle fic. I think that’s all you need to be warned about. <3

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“Ama-chan?” Eri’s soft voice echoed throughout the room as she laid down on the floor, looking up at the ceiling with eyes filled with boredom. Her white hair sat on the floor nicely, being held up with two bright red sparkly bows that matched her red overalls quite nicely.

The elder looked over to the girl on the floor, an anxious look spread across his face - of course, that was his normal face but the fact that Mirio - his boyfriend - had left him in charge of taking care of the kids. ...it made his stomach upset with every thought. “..y-yes, Eri-chan?”

“...will you play with me?” she asked, now sitting up in a criss-cross position, the twinkle in her eyes shining as she looked at him. The blue haired hero’s eyes widened with fear as he shook his head. “...you know, M-Mirio is a lot better at these things...than I am. You should just wait for him,” he said, waving dismissively as he continued to ‘supervise’ her.

Eri pouted softly, standing up - she wasn’t all that tall, but it still amazed him how much she had grown since... that day. “Please..?” she begged, clasping her hands together.

Amajiki only shook his head. “...honey, y-you know I’m...bad at this. You’ll have more fun with Togata, anyways.”

“But I wanna play with you..!” Eri sat down right in front of him, grasping on to the hoodie of his hero costume. Her grip wasn’t strong but it wasn’t letting go any time soon. He might as well just let her be, he thought as he closed his eyes and tried to think of a way to please her.

All of that was cut off when little fingers missed his hoodie and accidentally danced over the nape of his neck. A gasp escaped his lips, almost knocking her over as he went to protect himself from the ... weird sensations.

“A-Ama-chan? D-Did I hurt you?” Eri’s pout had turned to a slight frown, her eyes wide with fear. Amajiki shook his head frantically, a blush creeping up on his face. Petting the top of her head softly, he replied, “no. Y-You didn’t hurt me. Could I call m-myself a hero... if you out of all people hurt me? ..I may not be as strong as Mirio, but I’m... still worth being a hero. It just... er..” the rest of the sentence was lost in a mumble.

“Ama-chan! You have to speak louder, or else I can’t hear you!”

“...y-you just tic...” there he was, incoherently mumbling the rest of the sentence to himself- he almost looked a lot like Deku at the moment but Eri couldn’t bring that up. A bright red blush was on his face, and it was starting to creep toward his ears.

“I think what he’s trying to say is that he’s ticklish, Eri-chan.”

Speak of the devil, the childish blonde had come back with the snacks already - and he had heard everything that they did. Amajiki couldn’t really function after hearing that word - it was like his whole body stopped working with him.

“...what’s ‘ticklish’?” Eri asked, fiddling with her hands.

“...you see, Eri-chan, our dear Ama-chan is very ticklish..”

Mirio went over to the side of the shy boy, watching him curl up in a ball - his heart melted at the sight of his lover. A bright red blushy face, small whimpers coming out of his mouth, hiding himself so that he couldn’t get to his most ticklish spots - what a cute boyfriend he was.

“...and ticklish.. is a feeling you get when someone tickles you. ...it makes them laugh.”

“..laugh? Does it make them happy?”

“Oh, yes,” Mirio teased. “Very happy.”

Eri’s eyes widened in surprise before getting a mischievous glint in them. “..h-how do I tickle..?” she asked, looking down at her hands and feet - the more she tried to find the answer, the more Mirio felt sad and relieved for her. She was finally getting childhood experiences. ...maybe one that’ll stick for a while..

“This is how you tickle, Eri,” the blonde said as he wiggled his fingers in place, watching Tamaki already start to squirm in place. The teasing was starting to get unbearable - the more and more they said that word, the more he got butterflies in his stomach. Eri copied his movements, seemingly still puzzled at what she was doing.

“That’s it! Good job. Now you just have to do it on him.” Mirio applauded her, immediately grabbing his foot and holding it in place. The anxious hero’s eyes widened as he struggled in place - Eri looked almost hesitant to do it.

“He’s... struggling,” Eri commented, worry filling her face.

“That’s what people do. See, tickling causes fight or flight responses - which means they either run away from it or take it like a man. In which case, he tends to run away from it. I’m not hurting him, I promise. And if I do, I’ll apologize straight away. Sound good?” He held out his pinky and she took it with a nod and a grin.

“Now, wiggle your fingers on his foot. Test it out,” he said, holding him very still with both of his arms. The white haired girl seemed very shy about it at first, not really sure if she was doing it right, but when she glided her fingers on the sole of his foot, the reaction they got was instantaneous.

“...h-hold.. o-on! Aaaah-! Ahahaha... w-wait, s-stop! P-please..!” Eri almost seemed shocked at the giggles that he was producing - then again, no one had really heard him laugh. A smile was all they got, and even that was rare for them. “See? They laugh.”

“M-Mihihiro.. p-please! Dohohon’t do thihihis..!” The soft giggles were still pouring out of his mouth, as he hid his face within his hands, clearly embarrassed out of his mind.

“S-So... Ama-Chan’s happy?” Eri asked, never letting up her soft but vicious attack of his foot.

“Mhmm, very happy.” Mirio commented, releasing one of his arms to wiggle his fingers at him. “But watch. I can make him happier. I’m gonna need to let go of him, so watch out, okay?” The little girl nodded as she backed up, watching her hero release his grip and sit on his waist instead. She tilted her head softly, still really new to this.

“Tickle tickle, Amajiki~,” Mirio whispered into his ear, delicately attacking his ribs one by one. His laughter seemed to increase by a little - it was full blown laughing and not just small little giggles. Eri gasped, a smile on her face. “...show the little girl you’re happy, baby,” he said, grabbing his arms and holding them above one hand.

Amajiki was just too pure for this world, Mirio concluded. Hair starting to get all messy from the squirming, a bright red face the color of a tomato, eyes pricked with tears due to him not being able to take so much. ...it was just all too much for him. It made his little heart flutter with joy.

“...so, if I tickle here,” she pointed to her own ribs and then proceeded to poke the side of Tamaki’s, “..I make him more happy?”

“That’s correct. He can’t take very much of this, however, so we need to switch. I know, here!” Mirio pointed to his sides, smirking softly.

“... t-tickle tickle, Ama-chan!” Eri cried out as both of her hands found their way to his sides, making him jolt in ticklish agony.

“Y-You.. guhuhuhys are sohohoho mehehean!!” Tamaki shook his head back and forth as he tried to free himself from his loving boyfriend’s tight grip. “..p-please stohohohop..!” By this point, the poor boy’s laughter had turned a little bit wheezy, in which was a sign to stop.

“Eri-chan, let’s give him a break, yeah? We can’t keep tickling him - but we can after he recovers.” Mirio stopped his attack, and Eri somehow surprisingly stopped hers too.

“...t-thank.. you,” Amajiki wheezed, covering his face with his arms.

“C’mere, baby,” Mirio said as he gave a small kiss on his forehead, leaning against him softly. Eri sat down on the blonde boy’s lap, gaining a hug from him. The blushy hero “reluctantly” leaned back into his boyfriend, closing his eyes softly.

A guy could get used to this..

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[thebigqueer]

Solangelo - "Lethal Enemies" - One-Shot

Summary: Nico and Will are venturing through Tartarus, and there they meet a familar god: Eros.

Word Count: 2905

SPOILERS: Tower of Nero, Burning Maze; TW: Homophobia/Internalized Homophobia, some violence (and blood but it's not too descriptive), outing mentions

Read on AO3

Heat pulses in the air, scorching Nico’s skin as he and Will stumble through the darkness. He isn’t sure how long they’ve been down here, but his body is already aching and screaming from all the effort of fighting monsters and trying to survive.

Will’s arm brushes against Nico’s, and the child of Hades almost jumps back at the touch. His skin feels feverishly hot, bursting with unnatural heat. When Nico looks up at him, he realizes that Will’s face is severed with scratches, gashes, sweat, and an overall pale wash. Small holes smoke in his CHB T-shirt, and his jeans are ripped at the sides from where a monster clawed him.

At the sight of him, Nico’s chest constricts with sympathy and guilt. As much as he loves Will for coming with him, he knows the kind of pressures that would put on both of them. Will looks so out of place in such a dark, gloomy world, where only terror and misery reside.

To Nico, Will is the complete opposite of terror and misery. He’s the sunshine after a terrible rain storm; he’s the sweetness after the sourness. But here, in the raging darkness, Will looks washed out. He doesn’t belong here.

Tartarus is Nico’s terrifying, unspeakable past; Will is his bright future. The two should not be clashing.

This hell was made to ruin. And it seems like it’s doing its job on Will, too.

Nico slips his fingers into the blond’s and squeezes, pushing his own feverish warmth into his boyfriend. Will turns his face to Nico’s and, for the first time, Nico sees a crack in his eyes - usually so sky blue, they’ve turned almost gray with fear. He’s breaking.

Nico leans into Will’s side, trying to find solace in the overbearing darkness. “It’s only going to get worse,” he mutters.

“Then I’m glad I’m not doing it alone.”

Nico offers a wavering smile, and they continue walking. For the most part, it seems like they’re safe from any monsters, but Nico knows from past experience that he can never be too careful. His eyes swerve all around them, watching out for any new monsters, and his Stygian sword pulses in the darkness.

After a few moments, there’s a shift in the air. It’s still warm and unbearable, but there’s a new scent - like a faint waft of the outside world, the breath of a fresh summer day. It smells almost like Will.

The blood in Nico’s veins buzzes and he stops immediately. Fear courses through his body. Will staggers as the child of Hades grips his wrist and pulls him back. At the sight of Nico’s ashen face, Will leans in. “Everything good?” he asks.

“That smell,” he whispers. “What does it smell like to you?”

“Well,” Will says, eyebrows knitting together as he thinks, “it kind of smells like you, weirdly? Like, the earth after a rainy day.”

That’s all Nico needs to know before panic settles in his chest. His mind crawls with memories and the pain of humiliation he faced just a year ago. Jason, Croatia, Diocletian’s spectre.

“No,” he mutters. “Will, we need to leave.”

Without waiting for a response, Nico tightens his fingers over Will’s wrist and starts to pull him away. But a voice murmurs, “Oh, leaving so soon, child of Hades?” and Nico knows right then and there that he and Will are trapped.

The voice pours over the heat like melted chocolate, smooth and deep, but a dagger of betrayal resides in it. Nico’s heart thuds on overtime and his nerves flair with anxiety, but he knows he can’t go anywhere. This meeting was bound to happen.

“Eros,” Nico hisses.

“Ah,” the voice murmurs. “So you recognize me.”

The god isn’t visible, but Nico can feel his cold presence anyway. “Who would forget such a jackass?”

A low, rumbling laugh echoes around them. Will’s hand releases its hold on Nico’s and lingers over the gun at his side. Nico raises his sword.

“Well, well, well,” the god says, “it looks like you’ve got a new friend here with you. How sweet.”

“Show yourself,” Will demands. “Face us like the hot-headed deity you are.”

Though he can’t see it, Nico still senses the raised eyebrow over the god’s eye. “Oh, he’s feisty, too. You sure have won with him.”

“Stop talking about him like he’s some kind of object,” says Nico. “You heard him. Show yourself.”

The same laughter crashes over them, and after another moment, a being appears. His long, black hair gleams despite the absence of light, and his red eyes glimmer maliciously in the darkness. They stare right through Nico, stabbing him in the face, and suddenly Nico’s hurtling to the past, to the misery. He scowls at the god.

Eros’ wings spread around him, the feathers fluttering a little as he shifts. He crosses his arms and offers a sharp smirk to Will and Nico. “Aw, look at you two,” he purrs. “So young and in love. Ready to fight together in Tartarus.”

“What do you want?” Nico asks, brandishing his sword. “Why are you bothering us?”

Eros’ shoulders rise and fall gracefully in an innocent shrug. “Oh, nothing, really. I was really just hoping to see how you were. I heard you were traveling down here, and I thought I would check on your progress.”

“Well, great. You’ve checked. You can leave.”

He laughs again, a low, tumbling laugh that heightens Nico’s rage. “Ever the sarcastic, child of Hades. No, listen. I can help you.”

“And how will you do that?” Will asks, raising an eyebrow. “You’re nothing more than a love god.”

“Have the Aphrodite children taught you nothing, pitiful child?” Eros hisses. “Love plays an important role in life.”

“I don’t see how love is helpful here,” Nico says, spreading his arms to gesture to the rest of Tartarus. “All I see is pain and misery. You can leave.”

“Oh, but I see where love can become important.” Eros raises a brow and tips his head to the boys. “Are you two not in love?”

Nico blushes. “That is not of your concern.”

“I can influence a lot,” he promises. “Especially the way you two act together. Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase - the two you were oh-so-jealous of only some time ago - came here together. They got away safely. I can influence a lot between you and Will Solace.” He steps forward, and against his lips, a dagger-like smile beams at Nico.

The son of Hades crosses his arms. “I happen to remember that I got through here on my own. Love does not solve all problems.”

Eros raises an eyebrow. “Does it not?” He begins to circle around Will and Nico, glaring at them with his ruby-red eyes. “Tell me, Nico, does Will not make you feel special? Does he not help you feel better?”

Rage billows up in Nico’s chest, pushing against his sternum. “I am happy with Will. But he does not solve my problems, just the way I do not solve his.”

“But you are happier with him, is that right?” Another smile flashes across his mouth. “And who are you to thank for him, hmm? If it were not for me, you would not be here today with him. You would not be happy accepting who you are.”

Nico’s anger rises up to this throat, hot waves of rage crashing against the back of his neck. He surges forward, but Will pulls him back. “No,” he whispers. “He’s a god, Nico. Don’t try.”

Nico glares at Will, but deep down, he knows Will is right. So he sighs and stands still.

“I would not be happy?” he growls. Nico's muscles tighten with rage. “You humiliated me. I wasn’t ready to admit who I was; I wasn’t ready for any of that.” This time, despite Will’s insistence, Nico rushes forward, his anger pulling him toward the god. “It was my choice, and you stole it from me! And you’re congratulating yourself?”

“It’s not like there were many people there,” the god scoffs. “Only Grace.” He pouts. “I heard about the demigod’s untimely death, however. Terribly sorry.”

Nico shakes his head. He knows Eros is just trying to get under his skin by mentioning Jason. He can’t let himself get distracted.

“Your outing of me was not something to celebrate,” hisses Nico. “I spent so much time hating myself, hating Percy because of who I was. When you forced me to blatantly admit that I was gay” - a burst of confidence blooms in Nico’s chest as he says the last word - “I had never felt so violated. I only hated myself more, because I was terrified of who I was. The entire experience was humiliating. You ruined me.”

“Did I?” Eros asks. “The first step in accepting yourself was to admit you were gay in the first place. I pushed you to accept yourself.” He gestures to Will. “Now look where you are! Happy and in love with a boyfriend! Is there anything better?”

Nico’s chest heaves as another wave of rage suffocates him. His body shakes with anger. He feels like a detonating bomb; in just a few seconds, he will explode and destroy everything in the area.

“You only made things worse,” mutters Nico. “I spent days worrying about who was watching me, worrying about how much people knew. I hated myself every moment, every second afterwards, even more so than before you forced me to admit that I was gay.” Nico takes a deep breath, his chest expanding as he does so. “Maybe you’re right - maybe I did need to admit to myself who I was. But it should have been on my own terms. You did not help me accept myself; all you did was make me tell myself what I already knew. You made the entire process of accepting myself more difficult than it needed to be. When I spat out that I liked Percy, I felt… I felt violated. I felt like someone had stabbed me right through the back. I… I hated myself more than I ever did at that moment. I thought it was the end; I thought right then and there, I would die. Not from embarrassment, but from someone else’s hands. My own hands. I thought there was nothing more humiliating than to be forced to tell someone I didn’t know that I was some kind of disgusting creature. I felt so dehumanized.” Nico glares at Eros. “Don’t feel happy that you did that. You did not improve my life; only I did that. Not Will, not you, not any of my friends. Me. Do not take credit for my accomplishments.” Hot fury seethes in Nico’s core, washes up over his chest, crashes against his throat, trickles down his arms and legs. His lungs expand and exhale as he breathes hard, each breath like acid burning down his sinuses. “My work has been looked over too much, ever since I first learned of demigods. Do not take the credit for my self-improvement, because you are one of the many reasons I was destroyed in the first place.”

For a moment, no one speaks. An eerie silence lingers in the air, holding Nico in a chokehold. Eros simply watches him, his eyebrows lowered and a fierce, judgmental, angry look glowing in his red eyes. Will tilts his head at Nico and offers the ghost of a smile. I'm proud of you, he seems to be saying.

Nico doesn’t return it, but even then, a little flower of confidence blooms in his chest.

Eros crosses his arms once more, airing his defiance out into the open. Arrogance sparks along his wings. He raises a brow at Nico. “You have become more bold in yourself. Self-assured.” A sharp smile grates against his mouth. “And that would not have happened had you not admitted you were gay at all. I may have humiliated you, but in the end, you have become stronger through your pain. You have become sturdy, grounded into the world. I have led you to your happiness.” He offers a secretive smile to Will. “And your happiness is your boyfriend. You’re welcome.”

Nico watches Eros, glaring at his over-confident face, at his casual posture, at the pride in his eyes. He is too assured in himself, too hot-headed.

The sword in Nico’s hand grows heavier, a hum buzzing through the metal. Irritation and anger swirl in his chest, creating a tornado in his body, and he’s drowning, drowning in his rage, in his memories, in his untamed emotions.

He knows what he has to do.

Nico raises his sword, and, without even thinking, he slashes the god’s shoulder.

“Nico!” Will cries, but it’s too late. Eros cries out and hisses through his teeth, holding his arm in his hand. His angry red eyes gleam right at the child of Hades, projecting all his rage and pain right to Nico’s core. The demigod merely stands still, waiting for the god’s next move.

“Oh, you arrogant hero!” Eros cries. Golden ichor slips past his fingers, dripping onto the ground, and for a strange, fleeting moment, Nico finds that it looks beautiful in the darkness, sparkling where it should not be.

Only pain belongs in Tartarus. Nico wants to hurt Eros the way he hurt him.

Nico knows the act was stupid, but he can’t help the grin that takes over his face. Laughter bubbles out of his chest, sprinkled with something maniacal, something angry. “What’s wrong, my lord?” Nico purrs, leaning against his sword. “You said love fixes pain. Can it fix you?”

Eros snarls at Nico, but the son of Hades doesn’t care. Nothing beats the thrill that thrums in his body at the sight of the god being so frustrated.

Eros pants through the pain, his face turning red. “You think you are something special, don’t you, child?”

Nico laughs, the sound of it ironic in such a painful place. The laugh overflows with repressed pain, with hot anger.

That laugh belongs here in Tartarus, with its madness and rage.

“Oh, Eros,” Nico mutters. “I spent so long thinking I deserved nothing. I spent so long thinking everywhere I went, misery followed me. I have never felt special.” He glances up and down at the god. “You asked me if even Will makes me feel special. Well, no. He makes me… feel good. But you know what makes me feel actually special?”

Despite his rage, curiosity strangles Eros’ eyes. He waits for a response, hissing as more ichor spills out of his godly being.

“What makes me feel good, what makes me feel like I have a worth in this world,” Nico says as a smile creeps over his face, offering him a maniacal glow, “is when I provide justice to those who have done wrong. Originally I always believed Death has no mercy, only justice.” He slashes again at Eros, who cries louder and falls to his knees. He pants through the pain. “Well, I suppose there are other ways to provide justice.”

Nico runs his finger through the golden ichor that gleams over his sword. Touching it, Nico’s finger tingles with power. He looks at Eros again. “What makes me feel special is when I defeat entitled assholes like you, my lord.”

“You have not defeated me,” the god growls.

“No, not physically,” Nico agrees. “But I have defeated the pain you have caused me.” He touches the tip to Eros’ chin, balancing it mere millimeters from his skin. The point gleams red as it reflects the glow of Eros’ eyes. “Begone, you pitiful asshole.”

Eros snarls and throws Nico’s sword away, but the demigod only smiles. This is exactly the reaction he wanted.

“You cannot kill me, arrogant hero,” Eros reminds him.

“No, but I can scare you.” Raising an eyebrow at him, Nico says, “Many have been scared of me. I am a child of Hades. You may be a god, but you have no idea of what I am capable of.”

Eros regards Nico with a sharp glare, but the sight of it no longer grates against Nico’s conscience. He’s only bursting with energy, with confidence. He hasn’t felt so alive in years. Power hums in his core, billows over his chest, courses through his veins. He feels almost invincible.

“You have made an enemy, Nico di Angelo,” Eros promises. “And love is no enemy you want. Especially not with someone in your situation.”

Nico falters. What does Eros mean? Does he mean his being gay? Does he mean with society in general? Then Nico turns to his boyfriend, who’s shivering with fear and adrenaline at his side, and it clicks. He means Will.

Nico scowls at Eros. “You say I have made an enemy, Eros, but the truth of the matter is that you made me an enemy long ago. When you first stabbed me in the shoulder with your weapon.” Nico glances at the wound on Eros’ left arm and shakes his head. “You made a mistake long ago. You are only now realizing it.”

Silence lingers around them, floating tensely in the hot air. Then Eros says, “I can influence a lot.” A glimmer of confidence returns in his eyes. “Be warned, child of Hades.”

With that, Eros disappears. And Will and Nico are left alone once more, staring ahead to whatever terrors lie ahead.

[kyber-crystal]

Bulletproof

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: ~1.7k

Summary: In which the Captain gets a little too overprotective, but you end up interpreting his words the wrong way and taking it a little too personally. 

Warnings: slight mentions of violence, angry steve, soft steve

A/N: this was so bad omg I’m so sorry.

The flight back after a mission was always quiet, whether everything had gone well or not. The team was both physically and mentally drained, falling into a comfortable silence as the Quinjet propelled itself through the sky. This mission in particular had taken a toll on all of you.

You were seated in the far corner of the jet as you glanced over at the screen of the flight details, thigh bandaged and throbbing mildly.  While you were able to extract the intel you needed, you'd thrown yourself into the crossfire to do so, being gunned down by a sniper from above. You were lucky enough for it to be just a simple graze, but Steve was treating it as if it was the end of the world.

Of course, you kind of understood where he was coming from. Despite the fact that you had over ten years of experience in the field, you were the youngest member of the team besides Pietro and Wanda, being only two years behind Steve himself. But that didn't stop you from feeling annoyed every time he seemed to act a little too overprotective no matter how many times you claimed you could take care of yourself.

"He's just worried for your safety," Natasha tried to explain when you complained about this one night. "You know how Cap is. A let's-get-down-to-business and always-follow-the-rules type of guy. I wouldn't overthink it if I were you."

You still couldn't help but think that he was overreacting a majority of the time, however. And in this one case in which he'd caught your side comment, it had erupted into a full-on argument.

"The least you could've done was call for backup," he said through gritted teeth. "You went against orders and tried to handle things on your own, and look where that got you."

"Excuse me?" You rolled your eyes. Whenever he made jabs at your decisions like this it made your blood boil with a furious anger; wanting nothing more than to explode at him. "I was successful in doing my job, was I not? And it's not like there were any better options presented to me at that moment."

"That doesn't matter. You could've gotten yourself killed!" he shouted, jaw tensed and arms crossed over his chest as you stared each other down. "How could you have been so stupid, putting your life on the line like that?"

"Stupid?" you scoffed, seething with anger at this point. "If I recall, I was the one who got the intel from the controls room and shut the system down!"

"And you got shot as you were leaving because you didn't keep a good enough lookout of your surroundings. You put the entire team into jeopardy," he told you matter-of-factly. The words stung, but you did your best to remain calm despite being unable to believe he had the nerve to say something like that. "You almost ruined this mission."

The team sat in stunned silence as they watched the screaming match unfold between you two.

"I'm sorry, but you know what, Rogers?" you spat, voice now raised several notches, "Maybe I'm sorry for pissing you off, but there's no way I'm gonna keep putting up with you constantly criticizing me for every little thing I do. We all make mistakes, so I don't get why I'm the only one who gets shit on for making a slip up every. Single. Damn. Time! I'm sick of you ordering me around like you're my boss, because you aren't."

"I'm trying to do what's best for both of us!" Steve yelled. "You just can't seem to get that through your head, can you?"

"Don't need to act like such an asshole about it."

"You know, I wonder which will get you killed faster, your loyalty or your stubbornness? Because one of those things is going to be the death of you someday," he shot back, his harsh words feeling like a spear being thrust through your chest. "And I won't take any credit for it, because it'll be all on you."

You refused to look away, even as your lower lip trembled and your shoulders shook, unwilling to back down. Your lashes brimmed heavy with tears, hands clenched into shaking fists in a desperate last bid to keep it together.

"Okay, cut it out," Tony finally interrupted, Wanda pulling you away from Steve as the murderous look in your eyes told her you were ready to throw hands. "You need to stop bickering like a married couple all the time."

"Tell that to the self-righteous egotistical man who thinks he's always in charge," you muttered.

"To the ignorant woman who's always throwing herself into the crossfire without considering how it might affect the overall completion of the mission," Steve shot back.

"You little—"

"Y/N," Wanda placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, "stop. It's not worth arguing over."

You winced as she helped you sit down, the pain from your wound beginning to catch up to you after standing on your injured leg for too long.

The rest of the flight was spent in silence, with you and Steve refusing to look in each others' direction entirely.

...

As soon as the jet touched down back at HQs, you quickly changed and went straight to the gym. After wrapping protective tape around your palms, you went up to one of the punching bags and began attacking the hell out of it, imagining it as Steve's face making it easier and seeming to further fuel your anger.

You went at this for an hour, pushing yourself to the max, refusing to give your screaming and aching limbs a break. Your muscles contracted and your arms and legs felt like they'd fall off at any minute but you continued going nonetheless, the aching pains that feeling like a million tiny needles stabbing at every inch of your body. Training was probably the worst thing to do for your leg, but the bullet wound was the last thing on your mind at the moment.

I wonder which will get you killed faster, your loyalty or your stubbornness? Because one of those things is going to be the death of you someday.

You put the entire team into jeopardy.

You almost ruined this mission.

You punched the bag harder, feeling your knuckles cracking and blood running down your fingers, fresh bruises beginning to form underneath. Steve had never been this harsh towards you before, and you started wondering if he really was right about the fact that you almost ruined everything.

Yet you still didn't understand why he had to be so overprotective all the time.

"What are you doing? You shouldn't be training, or else that leg won't recover."

At the sound of his voice all his words came flooding back. Your heart began racing and your blood boiled as you stopped what you were doing and looked up at him.

"Leave me the hell alone."

Steve ignored your words and took several steps forward, stopping just a few feet away from where you stood.

"You're bleeding," he said in a surprisingly soft voice.

"I'm fine," you snapped. "Now go away."

"Come on, just—" he pleaded, voice sounding broken, "just let me bandage your hands up for you."

Knowing he wasn't going to leave, you slid down against the wall and let out a defeated sigh, allowing him to kneel in front of you and take your hands in his. The feeling of his rough, callused skin against yours despite the frustration coursing through your veins still sent a little spark up your fingers, and you never hated yourself more for it than you did now.

You briefly scanned over his features, taking note of his tired and red eyes and the crease between his eyebrows as he carefully disinfected your wounds.

"Y/N," he finally spoke up after several minutes of silence, as he finished bandaging up your hands. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said."

"Okay." You refused to make eye contact with him, knowing you would break down the second you looked back up into his bright blue eyes.

"Y/N," his voice broke, the sound making your heart twist in your chest. "Please look at me, sweetheart."

"Don't call me sweetheart," you muttered. "I'm so sorry," he repeated again, "I don't think you're stupid and that you jeopardized the team. You saved us all, in fact. I really shouldn't have said any of that to begin with."

You didn't realize you were crying until you felt the salty tears roll down your cheeks and into your mouth, and you choked on a sob as you finally forced yourself to meet his gaze, breaking down.

"Then why did you act the way you did?"

"It was wrong of me," he exhaled, "I...look, I'm just worried about you, because if that extraction did go wrong and something happened to you, I'd feel like it was all on me. I'd feel like it was my fault, because I failed to look out for you. And I don't think I can handle being responsible for your death."

"As much as you hurt me," you said as you stood up and were pulled into his arms, voice muffled by the fabric of his T-shirt, "I could never bring myself to actually hate you."

"I just care about you too much, I can't lose you," he murmured into your hair, arms tightening their grip around your waist. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," you mumbled, voice muffled by his T-shirt, "I forgive you."

"I love you," he whispered so quietly that he thought you wouldn't catch what he was saying, but you just barely managed to hear it. But honestly, he didn't care. You couldn't help the smile forming on your face at that moment. "I love you too."

"Oh my god, that tension was fucking killing me," Bucky groaned as the doors to the gym burst open, and he and Sam came inside. "I was about to explode if you guys didn't kiss and make up." "Oh uh, also, Y/N, your leg..." Sam pointed out. You and Steve both looked down to see blood seeping through the thick bandaging wrapped around your thigh.

"Well, shit," you choked out. "Oops."

"Language," Steve joked. "Come on. Let's go to Bruce so we can get that treated."

"Don't have too much fun with each other!" the two men called after you.

"Shut up!" you shouted back.

[secretpeachtea]

Onigiri Miya Tidbits Ch 6

Title: the eagle, the seagull, the crow, and the Brazilians

Genre: gen fic, reader insert

Word Count: 5.3k (whoops)

Summary: Onigiri Miya is now hiring and you just happen to be the right person for the job. The business has been gaining popularity since its grand opening, and many customers travel from different cities just to have a bite of Miya Osamu’s delicious recipes. You did expect some craziness from working in food services, but what you didn’t expect was to be bombarded with frequent tomfoolery from a bunch of attractive volleyball players during your shifts.

disclaimer: manga spoilers

A/N: this one’s a bit of a slow burn (more so than the usual hehe), but I promise it gets better near the 2nd half! There’s not much drama in this chapter, but I think y/n deserves a bit of a break ya feel? Enjoy, my dudes

Previous///Next

Tonight is a special night because it’s ‘Create Your Own Onigiri’ night! Your boss decided to hold this small event to try something new and allow his customers to have some fun in the process. There are laminated onigiri instruction sheets on each of the tables as well as a small customized menu created for this event specifically. You helped him post a couple announcements on social media about the event a week prior to inform the public, and so far, things have been going smoothly.

Osamu is mainly in the kitchen prepping any ingredients for the customers and you’ve been standing at the register as usual. You are pleasantly surprised at how much everyone was enjoying making their own onigiris, and it seems like people of all ages were having fun.

“Welcome to Onigiri Miya!” You greet automatically with a bright smile as the front entrance slides open. A group of very physically fit men walk into the shop with large sports duffel bags slung across their shoulders. Despite the slightly intimidating aura the group gave off, one of the males walked inside with a young child hugging his arm. You scan over all of them briefly and your eyes widen as you make eye contact with Ushijima whom you just met a little over a week ago when the Shiratorizawa alumni visited.

You gave the tall volleyball player a small smile. “Hey, Ushijima-san! What brings you back so soon?”

“You assured me that I should bring my team, and we all wanted to participate in the event today,” Ushijima responded back. “My teammate, Romero-san, is not from Japan, so we wanted to find a restaurant with traditional food.”

“R-right…” You didn’t expect him to actually bring his team any time soon, but you’re still amused at how seriously he took your words from before. You can assume that the only foreigner in the group is the ‘Romero-san’ that Ushijima spoke of. There are probably hundreds of other restaurants the group could’ve gone to for a more cultural experience, so you’re a little giddy that he chose to come here. “Well, it’s good to see you again! I’d be more than happy to help your team have a good time here.”

To Ushijima’s left, another tall figure stood with a resting scowl. His gaze made its way to the kitchen where Osamu was and immediately lit up in recognition. Although, there might’ve been some confusion. “Miya-san, I didn’t know you worked here. Don’t you have practice right now?”

Your boss lets out a short laugh as he looks over his shoulder to look directly at the boy who spoke to him. “Wrong twin, Kageyama-san.”

“Ah.”

Kageyama looks down and glares at the floor mildly distressed at his mistake. There’s a part of you that wants to laugh at his reaction, so you do so internally. Suddenly, you feel someone staring at you, so your eyes shift over in that direction to a male with white hair and round eyes. His stature and overall mannerisms reminded you of a certain orange haired ball of sunshine, so you couldn’t help but stare back a bit longer than you intended. There was a sudden shift in his demeanor and his eyes narrowed at you.

“Why you staring? Is it ‘cause you’ve never seen a volleyball player my height? You’re impressed by the Hoshiumi Korai, right?” The boyish male lifted up his hands as if trying to intimidate you, but in your eyes, he seemed completely harmless.

With a sweet smile, you calmly reply back to his accusations. “Sorry about that. You just remind me of a good friend of mine. He also plays volleyball, and you’re both around the same height. I haven’t seen you play before, but I’m sure you’ve worked hard to get to where you are now regardless of your height, Hoshiumi-san.”

You know you’ve startled him with your kind and composed response when he freezes in place for a couple seconds before dropping his arms back to his sides abruptly and looking away to hide a small grin.

The last two people in the group, whom you assume are father and son, seem to be in their own worlds as they converse quietly. Now seems like a good time to let everyone get settled in, so you step away from the register and gesture for them to follow you. “ My name is (Surname) (Name). You guys can follow me! There’s a table over there that can fit all five of you. Then, I can explain how things are gonna work for today.”

Once the guys all settle in, you stand at the end of the table and point at one of the instruction sheets as well as the menu. “You can pick 2-3 ingredients for your onigiri! One of the ingredients will include meat or seafood and anything else can be a vegetable, seasoning, or both. All of the prices are written down on the menu and there are written instructions on how to make your own onigiri with pictures as guides. Feel free to call me over if you need clarifications. Any questions?”

Multiple heads shake at the same time. You pull out a tiny notepad and pen from your pocket and prepare to take orders. “Great! Then, what can I get for you guys?”

Romero lifts one of his arms to get everyone’s attention and begins to speak somewhat broken Japanese, “Order whatever! I will pay!”

After that declaration, you jot down all of the ingredients that the group orders including some refreshments. “Alrighty! We’ll set up all your ingredients soon on the counter. Once everything’s ready, there’ll be trays for you to take back to your table.”

You bow your head and stroll back behind the counter to relay the order to Osamu. As you’re helping set up some ingredients that don’t require any cooking, you notice that your boss frequently steals glances at the volleyball team with starstruck eyes and curiosity pokes at your mind. “What’s got you looking excited like a kid on Christmas?”

Osamu quickly turns around to face you while holding a spatula in one hand and tongs in the other. Leaning down to keep the conversation between the two of you, he unconsciously lifts both kitchen utensils up in the air with enthusiasm and flashes a childlike grin. “That’s Nicolas Romero! He’s a really famous world class volleyball player from Brazil. My brother and I used to watch him on TV all the time when we were younger, so it’s kind of crazy to see him in person!”

There’s a slight leap in your heart as you watch Osamu’s eyes brighten in joy but choose to ignore that strange feeling for the time being. “Now that you mention it, I think I saw a couple posters and billboards with his face on them when I was in Brazil.”

“I was really surprised when ‘Tsumu told me he was coming to Japan to play for the Schweiden Adlers. I never thought he’d come to my restaurant though!” Your boss is quite awestruck at the idea that such an important figure from his childhood was about to eat food that he cooks himself and it’s enough to elicit a giggle from you.

It’s not long before all the ingredients are set up on four large trays along with a couple beverages. You face the group of males and raise a hand next to your mouth. “Order’s ready for Romero-san!”

Romero stands up from his seat and pats his son on the head to stay put before gesturing at Kageyama to follow him. “Tobio, help me bring the food?”

“Of course, Romero-san!” The setter shoots up from his spot with a zealous expression and immediately follows behind his teammate like a baby duckling. When the two arrive in front of the counter, they give you a short thanks and take their trays back to their table. Osamu subtly glimpses at his childhood idol but quickly looks back down with a flustered expression when he notices you sending him a smirk of your own.

With everyone pretty much settled in, you decide to walk around to the other tables to see if anyone needs any assistance or if they have any questions. You return back to the register after a couple of minutes ready to sit down and take a quick break, but you notice a couple drinks sitting on the counter. The volleyball team must have forgotten to take them when they took their food. Since you didn’t have much to do at the moment, you decide to take the drinks to their table yourself.

With arms full of beverages, you walk up to the Adlers. “Hello, sorry to interrupt, but you left your drinks on the counter. I just thought I’d bring them for you.”

Romero takes the drinks from you and then distributes all of them to each person after sporting a grateful smile. “Ah, thank you!”

You’re about to walk away, but the sight before is almost too ridiculous for you to look elsewhere. All of the men are in the process of creating their onigiris, but each creation looks quite...interesting.

Ushijima’s onigiri is one very large globular rice ball, which distinctively resembles a volleyball, with a few sesame seeds sprinkled at the top. Hoshiumi’s onigiri almost looks like it’s about to explode with how much meat was piled inside the rice and probably would’ve fallen apart if he didn’t have it enclosed around both of his hands. Kageyama’s onigiri is of a decent size, but he must’ve put too much pressure when shaping the rice because it just looks like mush with obvious handprints. Romero is the only person at the table who was able to make a normal onigiri, but everyone seems to be enjoying their time so you don’t think Osamu needs to come over and help.

You finally look at the young child sitting next to his father and tilt your head in confusion when you notice that he’s not participating or eating anything his father made for him. With slight concern, you turn towards Romero. “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but is your son not fond of the food? I could offer some other ingredient options?”

“Oh, that’s okay. Everything is perfect!” Romero replies with a knowing look. “Rubens is just a little grumpy since he misses his mother. She met new friends at an onsen and they invited her out to go shopping today. Thank you for asking, though.”

After living in Brazil for a couple months, you were able to pick up on some Portuguese. You’re not in any way fluent yet, so when the older man briefly speaks to his son, you can only make out Romero asking Rubens if he wanted a different onigiri and that he needed to eat to be healthy. The boy’s pout deepens and just simply states that he was bored. Romero sends you an apologetic smile, and you just wave your hand to let him know that you understood.

A sudden idea pops into your head. “Romero-san, is your son allergic to anything? I have an idea to help Rubens enjoy himself more. Would you mind if I try to make your son something?”

“Go for it! My son does not have any allergies, but he does love pork!” Romero nods his head in approval.

You quickly make your way back behind the counter and peek over Osamu’s shoulder as he stands in front of the stove. “Hey boss, do you mind if I try to make something for Romero’s son?”

“Sure. I don’t think anyone needs any help or anything at the moment, so you’re free to do whatever you’d like,” Osamu replies nonchalantly and you tap his arm gratefully.

Situating yourself in front of the counter surrounded by ingredients, you momentarily think about what you want to do. You make the final decision to create two designs for the onigiris that you think Rubens might like. After washing your hands, you gather up all the ingredients you need and even snatch some extra pork from Osamu’s pan. After a couple minutes of putting together the onigiris, you place them on a plate and examine your creations.

The first onigiri resembles a simplified stegosaurus with meat substituting the spines of the dinosaur and some sesame seeds throughout the body for texture. The second onigiri is just a regular rice ball with pork and vegetables, but a couple irregularly shaped pieces of nori are scattered across the surface to resemble a dinosaur egg. Both onigiris lie on top of a small pile of bonito flakes to act as a nest.

You take the plate of food to where Rubens is sitting, a bit nervous since you aren’t sure how he’s going to react. Everyone else at the table just watches curiously as you place the onigiris in front of the young child and his eyes widen. He’s practically mesmerized by his dinosaur themed meal and even some of the other guys are impressed.

Rubens quickly turns towards his father and whispers into his ear. Romero chuckles and pats his son’s head lovingly before facing you. “My son wants to know how you did that. He absolutely loves it.”

A sigh of relief leaves your lips at your successful attempt at making the child happy. The only problem was that you were still in the middle of work, so you didn’t know if you could spend any more time here. Coincidentally, Osamu seemed to have overheard everything for the last couple minutes from his spot in the kitchen. “Hey, (Name)-san. If you wanna take a quick break and spend some time with the kid, I don’t think there would be any problem with it.”

You’re really grateful for Osamu’s leniency, but a part of you still feels bad as you turn to look at him. “Are you sure? I don’t want to skip out on my job so suddenly.”

“Don’t worry about it. The boss said it’s all good.” Osamu gives you a reassuring smile and you take it as your cue to grab an extra chair off to the side and sit beside Rubens. You’re about to grab some rice to begin teaching the boy, but a slight tug on your sleeve makes you freeze in place. As you look to your side, you see Kageyama’s hand near your shoulder and there’s an intense look in his eyes.

“K-Kageyama-san, would you like to learn too?” You ask a bit surprised. Your bewilderment is replaced with amusement when he nods at you furiously and you almost laugh out loud at his excitement.

“Oh! Me too! Me too!” Hoshiumi intervenes enthusiastically and even Ushijima seems to be interested. These guys sure were something else.

In the end, everyone in the group was watching as you demonstrated how to make different designs with the onigiri rice. Rubens finally succumbed to his hunger and began to eat his dinosaur meal, so you were left to attend to the grown up men who listened to you eagerly like school children, aside from Romero who needed to step outside to answer a call from his wife.

“Alright! Now that you have some of the basics down, why don’t you each try to make your own? Just to keep it simple, we’ll all choose a single design. Any ideas as to what you guys want to make?” There’s a brief silence as everyone tries to think of something doable. Suddenly, Ushijima lifts up his phone and an image of what you recognize to be Japan’s adorable volleyball mascot* is shown. You sweatdrop as Hoshiumi and Kageyama clap in agreement at the volleyball player’s obvious, yet adorable selection.

Other than having to give a few pointers to Hoshiumi and Ushijima, it seems like they were doing a pretty decent job at making the character. The one who was truly struggling was Kageyama. He was still putting too much pressure when molding the rice. As he continues to squeeze the rice excessively, you gently place your hands on top of his slender fingers.

“You’re putting too much force in your hands, Kageyama-san. Here, loosen your grip a bit and I can show you.” With that said, Kageyama lets go of his vice grip and allows you to guide his hands over the rice. The two of you stay like that for a couple more seconds until you successfully make a circular rice ball. As the male opens his palms upward with your hands still wrapped around his, his eyes sparkle in amazement.

Kageyama bows his head gratefully and when he looks back up at you, you’re taken aback by the amount of admiration flooding his expression. Your body stiffens when he quickly puts down the onigiri and clasps your hands between his. “Thank you, (Surname)-san!”

“N-No problem.” You feel a bit of heat creep up your cheeks with the way Kageyama was holding your hands so delicately.

The moment doesn’t last long, however, when you suddenly feel someone’s fingers graze the side of your face and a sticky feeling is left on your skin. When you look to see who the culprit is, your eyes fall on the youngest person at the table with one of the most terrified expressions you’ve ever witnessed. Almost immediately, Rubens starts apologizing in broken Japanese similar to the way his father has been speaking, “S-sorry! Sorry! Sorry!”

While you were busy working with Kageyama, Rubens had finished eating and wanted to make his own onigiri since he was still a bit hungry. He wanted to grab more rice from the bowl next to you but misjudged his movements and accidently touched your cheek with his sauce covered fingers. The child felt absolutely horrified and was afraid that you’d hate him for this.

Using a napkin, you wipe off as much as you can from your cheek and then proceed to lower yourself onto the ground to get to the child’s eye level. Mustering up your brightest smile, you try your best to reassure Rubens who looks like he’s about to cry. “Hey, hey! It’s okay, Rubens! I’m not mad.”

You spend the next couple minutes cooing at the sniffling young boy, and once you’re sure that Rubens is no longer going to cry, you sit back down on your chair. You lift up a ball of rice to gesture that you want to help him make an onigiri and he nods his head. You make a traditional triangular onigiri but place two rolled up bonito flakes for eyes and a piece of curved rice on top of the nori to make it look like a bearded face. There’s an almost immediate shift in the child’s mood when you point at the design and then to the empty chair next to him because you had made an onigiri that resembled his father.

Both of your laughs fill the air and the whole situation resembles a heartwarming scene from an anime. You were too distracted to notice the multiple pairs of eyes watching the scene in captivation. Once Rubens starts to eat again, you look up to see some lingering stares. “Is everything alright?”

Two stoic faces avoid your eyes by looking down, while Hoshiumi snaps out of his trance. The white haired male sits up a little straighter before addressing you. “Hey, you’re pretty good with kids, (Surname)-san!”

“I’ve had a couple babysitting jobs in the past. I’m not perfect with kids, but I did pick up a few things here and there,” you respond back shyly.

At this moment, Romero walks back into the shop while pocketing his phone. “Sorry to cut our time short, but I think my wife is coming back home soon. I should start heading out with Rubens. You guys can stay longer if you’d like.”

“That’s okay, Romero-san. I think we’re all ready to leave as well.” Kageyama lifted up his tray which spurred the rest of the other guys to do the same. As everyone helps out in cleaning up their area, you head back to the register to receive the payments for the meal from Romero.

The guys were now all ready to leave, but your boss quickly grabs their attention after taking a glance at a certain framed object on the shop’s wall. “Do you guys mind signing some autographs to put up in the shop?”

“Of course!” Romero exclaims. The rest of the team complies as well and they each sign a piece of paper that will most likely be displayed by tomorrow. Once that’s done, the team stands in front of the exit with their belongings. Rubens tugs at his father’s arms to get his attention and Romero bends down to listen to what the boy wants to say.

“What’s up?....Name?....Onigiri Miya…”

You can’t make out anything other than a few words, so you’re thrown completely off guard when Rubens suddenly jumps up from his spot and waves his arms wildly at you. “Bye-bye, Mrs. Miya!”

You don’t even hear any of the other males voice their goodbyes and leave the shop as blood rushes through your ears and your face flushes into deep crimson color. It seems like Osamu wasn’t spared either as his cheeks explode with heat at the implication. Both of you stand in awkward silence for a few seconds to calm your hearts until Osamu musters up the courage to glance at you first.

His expression shifts a little as he stares at your face. Osamu then points at your cheek. “Oh, (Name)-san. You still got a little something on your face.”

Momentarily forgetting about feeling flustered, you realize that you might not have gotten rid of all the sauce from when Ruben accidentally touched your cheek. “What? I thought I got it all off. Why didn’t anyone say anything?”

You attempt to wipe off the sauce remnants, but fail to do so each time because you don’t know where it is exactly. Osamu grabs a clean towel from the top shelf and slightly dampens it under the sink before standing in front of you again. “I got you.”

Osamu lifts up the towel and starts to wipe at your cheek softly. When your head starts moving too much, he brings up his other hand and places it gently on your neck to support it. There must have been a lot more sauce left than you expected because Osamu continues to hold you in place for a couple more seconds, his eyes never leaving your face. Unconsciously, your own eyes drift around his features and you can’t help but admit how handsome he looked at the moment.

“Oh, young love~”

Both you and Osamu flinch back when you hear one of the customers that are still in the room say their thoughts. When you glance at the table where the voice came from, you see an elderly couple smiling at you while holding hands with one another in a loving manner. The previous blush you had comes back in full force as you remember that the two of you were not alone and in a somewhat intimate position together.

“T-t-thanks, Osamu-san!” You stutter and almost trip over your own feet as you start walking towards the bathroom with hurried steps. “I’m j-just gonna...um...go to the bathroom really quick!”

As you rush away from Osamu, he just watches your back disappear behind the bathroom door. He stands in place quietly as he processes what had just happened and there’s a foreign feeling in his stomach that he can’t explain. He simply turns his back to the bathroom and rubs a hand to his cheek to hide the smile that threatens to creep onto his lips.

Leftovers

You’re currently laying on your couch comfortably surrounded by pillows and blankets while watching a movie on your laptop. Today was your day off from work, so you planned to stay in for the whole day and catch up on some alone time. As much as you want to focus on your movie, your mind starts to wander off.

About two days have passed since you met the Schweiden Adlers volleyball team at Onigiri Miya, but they were still on your mind. Based on the tidbits of information you’ve gathered from Osamu, Adlers and MSBY were rival teams. It almost makes you want to laugh at how different the two teams were in terms of their dynamics and personalities, so you hope to see them play against each other one day.

Suddenly, the ringing of your doorbell interrupts your thoughts and you pause your movie. You stand up and walk towards your door in confusion. You weren’t expecting anyone to visit, so you’re a bit weary as you look through the peephole.

As if the universe knew what you were thinking about before, you’re surprised to see Sakusa standing outside your door with his usual face mask. Swiftly unlocking the door, you pull it open and greet your curly haired acquaintance.

“Hey, Sakusa-san! What’s-” You stop speaking abruptly when you notice two large bags in the volleyball players arms and they look fairly heavy too. “Oh, wow. Are those...for me?”

Sakusa just nods his head and you quickly open your door wider to let him inside to place the bags down. You’re extremely curious as to what the contents were since both bags were covered by tissue paper, even more so because Sakusa was the one to bring them to you. He places both bags onto your coffee table and you’re about to ask what they were for, but he beats you to it.

“Congrats,” Sakusa states with his usual impassive expression but there’s a hint of softness to his tone.

At this time, you’re completely perplexed. “Congrats for what?”

“For graduating.” Sakusa’s reply causes your eyebrows to shoot up. “This is from the team.”

“Oh...” You’re left speechless for a moment as you try to understand the situation and once everything finally clicks, a warm feeling encompasses your heart. “Um...thank you.”

You gaze at the gifts bags for a bit longer with various emotions swirling through your eyes before talking again. “...did the team send you because we live in the same apartment building?”

“Yeah.” Sakusa let out a sigh which made you laugh a bit, but it didn’t sound like he was necessarily bothered by the task.

The male briefly checks his phone and gestures that he needs to leave soon. As Sakusa starts to make his way back to the front door, you follow with light steps to see him out. “Let everyone know that I really appreciate this when you see them again for practice!”

He nods in acknowledgement and the two of you exchange goodbyes before you finally lock the door as he walks away. Without a moment to lose, you rush over to the large bags sitting on your coffee table with anticipation. Just from the first glance, you can tell that there are multiple things piled up, so you’ll just have to take things out one by one.

After removing the tissue paper from the bag on the left first, you pull out something large and fluffy. In your hands is a huge teddy bear that’s wearing an MSBY jersey while holding a small note card that says “Congratulations on Graduation!”. You immediately know who it’s from because the bear’s multicolored fur resembles the colors of Bokuto’s hair. You give the bear a tight hug before placing it next to you on the couch.

The next thing you take out is a miniature set of hand lotions with a small bottle of pepper spray taped onto it. There’s a small note on the bottle that says “It’s dangerous walking home alone at night”. There’s no indication of who the gift giver is, but you know that Sakusa would be the only one to pick out these specific gifts. As you move the package to the side, another small piece of paper falls to the ground. It must have been stuck to the bottom of the hand lotion set. When you pick it up, there’s another note that says “Thanks for the soup”. Your smile widens. It seems like you had guessed correctly.

The last gift from the first bag is a beautiful mug with a sunrise design printed onto it. There’s a Brazilian flag sticking out of the mug, which makes it even more obvious that the gift was from your dear friend Hinata. When you push aside the flag, there’s a limited edition Bouncing Ball keychain inside the mug as well with a cute handwritten card that says “Congratulations, (Name)-san! We should hang out one day to play some beach volleyball like we did in Brazil!”. Your cheeks were starting to ache at how much you were smiling as you reread the note several more times.

You reach out to the remaining bag and pull away the tissue paper. Your nose is immediately assaulted by a pleasing floral fragrance and when you look inside, a large bouquet of flowers comes into your vision. Once the flowers are in your arms, you notice the note sticking out between the petals. Placing the flowers on your lap, you open the small folded piece of paper which says “Hey there, sweetheart. You should’ve let me know you were having such a big moment in your life! I would’ve done so much more, but for now, enjoy these flowers. The irises mean accomplishment and admiration. The peonies mean good luck. The daffodils mean new beginnings. Congrats on your win against school!” You’re quite touched by the amount of thought that went into this gift and based on the nickname, you can safely assume that this is Atsumu’s gift. You didn’t take him as a flower type of guy, but he’s always full of surprises. Nonetheless, you mentally note that you need to buy a nice vase to place these wonderful beauties in.

You thought that would be the last gift since you’ve already opened everything from the four MSBY players, but when you glance into the bag one more time, there are still two remaining boxes. They have the same wrapping, so you assume that they are from the same person. Taking both of them out carefully, you notice that the larger of the two boxes has a note that reads “I know you said you don’t normally eat sweets, so I tried my best not to add too much sugar”. Wondering what the card meant about sweets, you slowly open the lid and see two small cakes positioned next to each other with icing that spells out ‘Tiramisu’ and ‘Dark Chocolate’ on the respective cakes. Your mouth waters at the sight of the homemade desserts, but you restrain yourself because you were even more curious as to what might be in the other mystery box.

When you finally open the last remaining gift, there’s another note inside that says “It’s never too late to celebrate. Congrats, (Name)-san”. When you look underneath the note, your jaw drops as you let out a gasp. Inside was a gorgeous silver charm bracelet that was minimalistic enough for you to wear wherever you went. If the note wasn’t a big giveaway, the tiny onigiri charm attached to the bracelet convinced you that Osamu was the one who had given you these gifts.

The next couple of hours are spent finishing your movie with all of your gifts surrounding you. The inside of your room now smells like a mix of flowers and peachy lotion. The MSBY teddy bear is secured between your arms as you drink warm tea from your new mug while taking a bite out of each cake.

You’re not sure whether or not you want to jump up in happiness or simply cry from the overwhelming emotions, but either way, you’re glad to have met such amazing people the past couple months.

You couldn’t wait to get back to work.

Japan’s volleyball mascot: y’all know that volleyball mascot right? The one Ushijima loves to draw and the one that Hinata has shirt of

A/N: oof you made it! Can we all just give a moment of silence for Rubens for being the best boi? also another moment for the nice old lady at the end ;)

taglist: @kiyoo-omi​​