#one giant birb coming right up

[kyugens]

@sociieties  –  moon.

It's the way that light trespasses the leaf mess at the entrance from a different angle that gives it away – he's slept through at least another couple of centuries. The faint smell of blood in the air is always the same – he'd laugh if fully conscious. Although upon second thought, it was a little stronger, so much he could taste the iron laying thick in the back of his tongue every time he inhaled more deeply – another war, it seemed. Nevertheless, the likelihood of a senseless human conflict had never woken Itachi before, no– Something   ( someone? )   had entendered his domain, and its celestial energy was substantial enough to have prodded him out of his slumber. Itachi wailed loudly, the waves reverberating throughout his entire body and ruffled every feather covering it, only exhaling then, finally peeking his beak and then his head outside. It was mildly colder than he'd have liked. Chirping at the sight of such a strange creature so close to his nest, the ancient Sannin crawled the rest of his figure out – unworried about whether he'd startle his company or not. He towered over the pale being, and for no reason other than curiosity, Itachi all but envelops himself around the stranger – aligning his face with theirs. “ — Are you astray... young man? ”  The raven asks, although his beak hasn't opened, and he takes a moment to inspect the other – it was no more a boy than he was, although it wasn't a beast either. Something felt familiar, yet he couldn't say what.  “ — Who... Are you? ”

kinda plotted starter.

[ronanceisintheair]

@el-fandom-birb hope this clears things up.

Robbie and Nance find comfort in walking the labyrinthine sanctum that is Ikea. No matter how many times they go, it always feels like a new expedition, they spend hours on end there.

They fantasize about the model rooms; how such small spaces look absolutely devine. They dream about how their cozy Boston apartment, lacking in furniture, will soon...eventually, become a well furnished home.

Right now--the Boston apartment--it's their space. Full of love and care; time spent fixing peeling wallpaper and worn/stained carpet. Filled with thrifted furniture; both matched and unmatched.

Nance dreams of a nice bookshelf to fill. Robin just loves how much he seems to brighten when they walk into the place. It's a simple pleasure. Their busy schedules keep them away for weeks and at worst months.

Robin feels guilty when they find themselves standing in front of the large Ikea building without Nance by their side; but he's horribly busy--a time crunch of fulfilling two deadlines.

It's not as magical without Nance by their side. Robin imagines the things he would say, the things he would point out with gleaming cheerful eyes. Or the things he would roll his eyes at, the things he would find to be absurd.

But Robin's only here for one thing. That silly shark. Because they're virtually star crossed. Robin knows it's ridiculous, but they can't help the soft smirk on their lips as they sound out the name--Blahaj--stood in front of the bin of stuffed sharks.

Nance doesn't seem to warm up to it right away. It's cute. He has to admit. And Robin's excitement can't bring him to fully brush it off. But he's not letting that giant shark take up space on their bed thats just barely big enough for both of them.

As days pass and turn to weeks Robin notices that silly little shark is never too far from Nance. Sometimes they come home in the middle of the day and find Nance curled up on the sofa, shark as a body pillow of sorts.

[toournextadventure]

Here is this weeks analysis!!! Also, sorry if I sent this twice, but it didn’t show the little message it usually does when it gets sent so I wanted to make sure you got it.

I’ve got a good theory that all the pictures are connected to the same event but it’s different stages of the event. Said even is a giant get together/ reunion or party of some sort with Birb’s family. And I’m guessing that they are visiting Birb’s family because of the 2 little sneak peeks that you gave us.

The meme about making tamales is probably about Birb helping Abuela/Abuelita (I kinda forgot which one is used to I did both) make tamales for the bonfire/ party. Or it could be about all the family helping her out. Its the prep for the party that possibly happens as soon as Birb and Wednesday get there.

The violin/fiddle picture has me coming up with a few. Like Birb is the one playing and has hidden it from Wednesday just to fuck with her. Or it’s someone else in the family playing it. Another could be it’s just the music that is being played at the party which is the next step.

The actual bonfire picture takes place after all the music and goes 2 ways. Maybe the younger kids have gone to bed so its’s the older generation/ elders (plus Wednesday and Birb) hanging around and talking. Second route is that it’s just the big ass bonfire and Birb is helping the little ones put marshmallows on sticks to make s’mores.

Now the picture of the dude sleeping on the couch kinda threw me off cause it could be a few things. First it could be before the whole party and Birb is passed out on the couch from playing with her other siblings all day or the jet leg (if they fly but that’s a big ‘if’) The second thing it could be is that it’s one of the older kids, one of the boys, sleeping on the couch when Birb is there and she pranks him or something. All these are before the party.

The third thing it could be is that it’s after the party and it’s Birb, utterly exhausted, passed out on the couch. And again, it could be one of the other older boys asleep on the couch after the party and Birb is gone mess with him.

It can’t be Wednesday because the position the dude in the picture is sleeping in. And I’m guessing it could be one of the boys because it’s a dude in the picture so you could be trying to be literal or it’s Birb and you are either throwing us off or couldn’t find a different picture for that.

Anyway, this weeks analysis was quicker because these pictures are pretty straight(not me 🤣) forward to interpret if you add in the sneak peeks you gave us. I can’t wait for the new chapter to come out!!!

Welcome back, bestie!!!

So you're, like, 95% right, this one is a little more literal. So great job, bestie, you're nailin it, I can't wait for y'all to read this one. It's chaos, it's long, it's ridiculous, a good amount of it is lowkey based off the chaos of my own family. I think y'all are gonna enjoy it. As long as y'all are okay with, like, 10k+ words 😬

[kamipyre]

AND AND 📝 + Yong, if possible (feel free to skip any of these; have a fANTASTIC DAY, FERRE!!)

instead of suki rambling u get ferre!! ( ft. meta time with @theimpalpable )

send me “📝 + A Character” for me to go all out about the relationship between my muse and that character!!

okay so when I think of these two I think of mellow giant ( bc yong is a tall birb ) with chaotic gremlin ( bc suki is short in comparison to at least all of her friends so far….she needs to find shorter friends really 🥲 ) BUT ALSO…it’s because based on what we’ve plotted for these two so far and also from my understanding of yong ( so far- do correct me if I’m wrong tho!! ), he’s not the kind of person to necessarily get riled by the small things UNLESS it’s hurting someone he cares about. ( this is why suki’s here- so she can complain for him…she has enough salt and pettiness to complain for both her AND yong JFKSLJF ) So in this case, I would like to introduce u to this image….bc it?? Screams them?? KINDA??

But back to them!! I love that suki is perpetually confusing yong with her thoughts 24/7 and how they’re almost opposites in how suki is just go, go, go, and yong is more chill, mellow again might be the right word?? Like I wouldn’t necessarily say he’s completely go-with-the-flow, but it’s more like…he’s a warm sunny day by the the river…peaceful. A breath of fresh air, even and especially for someone like suki, who is almost always on her toes out a. habit but also b. a necessity since her job is very demanding and not to mention her coworkers are very similar to her in that they are also….go-getters. yong is very nice if not NECESSARY change for her pace as since he’s lived for a long while ( at least by human years ), he’s probably seen and experienced a lot…also just that he tends to wait and think things through first before making a decision…something that suki decidedly does not do more often than not JFKLSDJFSL but also as I’ve said before, she doesn’t’ make friends easily so when she makes someone, pls know she is clingy af….alexa play ‘never gonna give you up, never gonna say goodbye’ JFLKSJDKLFJS

 on yong’s end though, I hope that suki provides him with a certain…freshness to life again? Like of course he has his sibling and someone he’s crushing on BUT also suki is well…u see her, someone who very much would kneel to the side to smell the roses even if she’s seen it for the nth/ someone who would take a moment to look at a lizard bc she?? Wants to and needs no other reason to do so :’D basically, what I’m trying to say is that suki might give?? yong a little variation in his life as she is quite unpredictable….good thing yong is more than happy to follow along FJKSLDJF 

but also i love the irony in their friendship how yong is the chosen one of a korean phoenix, which still means he does have the motif of fire and then there’s suki….with a severe pyrophobia AND YET?? They still get along SO WELL :D I think that also comes with despite having different demeanors, they do share some crucial traits, like how they both aren’t incredibly open about their respective histories and traumas ( did I mention I’m gonna KICK THOSE PPLS BUTTS BTW; WHY WOULD YOU DO SUCH A THING TO SWEET TOL’ BIRB D-:< ) and how they both have unique habits ( ie. Suki- the paper thing, yong- clicking pens ) to cope with stress….it’s in that sense I like to think suki can relate to yong even if she doesn’t necessarily know a lot about him….

Honestly, when I think of yong, I think of a hearth fire- true it’s still fire, but it’s also controlled and tranquil, the kind of fire that suki these days is more comfortable and when she begins to really push to overcome her pyrophobia, the kind of fire she practices her exposure with….but also pls consider!! Suki asking yong to use his powers around her when she starts looking to overcome it bc he’s got the most access to fire AKA he can also turn it off, BUT ALSO when those mean people come back trying to find yong pls know suki is more than willing to get in front of yong bc even if she is a pipsqueak and DEFINITELY not the most physically intimidating, is she going to try and fite them?? yes absolutely ( but also pls consider on a lighter note, suki getting worked up at least once and trying to fite someone….only for yong to hold her back by the back of her shirt JFKLSJDLF )- she’ll probably break her hand in the process but anything for her friend, okay?

as for her discovering he’s a superhuman…well she’s seen pretty weird ( ie. See ace attorney trilogy ) so if she can handle spirit world shenaganians then while it might take some time, I think she wouldn’t be too surprised…if ppl can talk to the dead, then why not everything else as well?? I do think she would try to see where the intersections of the supernatural and science can be applied as well ( ethically, of course )….

As for where they can go….well I was thinking about her cinders verse and therefore her BLACK KNIGHT VERSE and just…if you’re okay with this, but yong being one of the ppl she confides in when she initially quits the lapd?? But also in her black knight verse, not her meeting up with yong occasionally for lunch and just maybe?? The two of them talking about the same person ( ie. The pigeon man ) but knowing him by a different name JFLSJDFJKL

[jungshookz]

hwayoung’s two now and y/n’s allowed to be emotional about it, okay?

➺ genre; ceo!yoongiverse!! a little bit of yoongi and y/n being mushy for each other!! fluff!! cutest drabble for the cutest girl!! jungkook and jimin bickering like an old married couple as per usual!! 

➺ wordcount; 3.2k

➺ p.s. this drabble is approximately five months overdue and it’s basically been collecting dust in my drafts so i figured i’d finally release it into the wild since it’s mother’s day today and i thought it’d be nice to read something sweet on this special day!!!! happy mother’s day!!! give ur mom a big ol hug and a kiss on the cheek :-) and if u don’t celebrate mother’s day that’s okay you can still read this for a small boost of serotonin wahoo :D 

                                       »»————-　🍰　————-««

“i’d just like to inform you that if it wasn’t for the fact that today is hwayoung’s birthday, the idea of having cake as part of breakfast would definitely be off the table.” yoongi pauses before turning his head to look at you pointedly, “in fact, it wouldn’t even had made it to the table in the first place.”

“trust me, you’ve made that clear multiple times-” you roll your eyes playfully before offering yoongi a half-hearted shrug, “it’s not a big deal! we’ll just give her a tiny little chunk that’ll fit in her tiny little hand and then we’ll save the rest for later!”

“yeah, right-” yoongi snorts, making his way over to you to hand you a balloon, “you’re probably going to sneak an entire slice of cake into her mouth while i’m not watching-” he teases, digging his fingers into your sides playfully before wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you back against his chest, “you think you’re so sneaky-”

“hey-!” you giggle, squirming in his grip when you feel him starting to nip at the side of your neck, “this is not a very productive use of our time, boss-”

“hey, you two! are you just going to stand there making out all day or are you actually going to help me with the decorations?”

both you and yoongi peer over the edge to see jimin standing by the bottom of the spiral staircase looking very unimpressed and you flash him a sheepish smile 

“we’re not making out-” 

“yeah, well you might as well be-”

“we’re helping! we’re almost done tying balloons to the banisters-” you argue, holding the balloon in your hand up before flopping it around enthusiastically, “we-” you jolt when you accidentally let go of it, watching with wide eyes as it rockets around the ceiling before poot-poot-pooting pathetically and landing on the ground by jimin’s feet

whoops

“…yes, that’s very helpful, thank you.” jimin mutters to himself, shaking his head as he bends down to pick up the sad, spitty balloon up off the ground with a grimace, “when you’re done, come down and help me because this balloon arch isn’t going to make itself! chop-chop, people-” he claps his hands together as he wanders back to the living room to the half-constructed balloon arch

“you know, you’d think that hwayoung was his daughter-” yoongi murmurs lowly, twisting his neck to give your cheek a quick kiss before pulling away

“mm, tell me about i-”

“she’s mine when the two of you drop dead!”

you jump in surprise at the sound of jimin’s voice snapping at you from below and you and yoongi exchange glances before bursting into quiet giggles

“i feel like i should be more concerned that jimin seems to be very eagerly waiting for our deaths.” you joke, reaching for the bag of balloons and pulling out a handful of them

as much as you love your daughter you weren’t planning on having a super big birthday party for her just because..,., well, she’s probably not going to remember most of it considering she’s two and also it’s just the five of you celebrating at home, so you thought that a cake and a bunch of presents would be good enough of a celebration

of course, when you told jimin about these plans he looked like he was ready to bury you alive which is why he insisted that he’d take care of the food and the drinks and basically the entirety of hwayoung’s birthday party and told you that all you and yoongi had to do was sit back, relax, blow up a couple of balloons and also choose a cute birthday outfit for hwayoung

(jimin actually ended up taking over that part as well. he bought her a new birthday dress and a brand new pair of shoes to go with it.)

“everyone can relax! the star of the show has now arrived!”

the sound of the front door slamming shut suddenly shatters the silence and you smile lightly when you see jungkook sauntering in as if he owns the place

“good morning, kook.” you hum, jungkook looking up at you before offering you a lopsided grin, “actually, the star of the show is still fast asleep in her room.”

“oh, right-” jungkook snorts, dismissing you with a flick of his wrist, “i mean, yeah, of course this is hwayoung’s special day- but check it out! i picked up her birthday cake and brought it back here and i didn’t accidentally ruin it somehow!” he raises the big blue box in his hand with a beam, “i’m incredible!”

“that thing looks huge, jungkook!” you frown lightly, “i told you not to go crazy-”

“please tell me you didn’t max out my credit card buying a giant cake for hwayoung.” yoongi chimes in, leaning over and folding his arms atop the banister, “i hope you realise it’s just going to be the three of you having to eat it all-”

“it’s hwayoung’s birthday, i had to splurge! you know that ‘everything is cake’ trend? i ordered a custom cake and asked them to make it look like a giant cookie! but i also ordered a dozen chocolate chip cookies just in case she’s not into the cake.” jungkook smiles proudly before pausing, “…of course, knowing hwayoung, she’s going to love the cookies and the cake, so i’m not too worried. i’m going to see if i can shove these into the fridge-”

“what’s wrong?” yoongi nudges your side to get you to look at him, “you look like you’re thinking, which is never really a good thing-”

“hwayoung’s two now.” you blink twice before turning to look at yoongi, “she’s two.”

“yes. you’re very good at keeping track of our daughter’s age.” yoongi coos, reaching up to pinch your cheek playfully, “good job, baby.”

“two years old!” you gasp, turning around to lean back against the railing before shaking your head, “my god, she’s aged.”

“oh my god, you’re right. the ripe old age of two.” yoongi teases before gasping dramatically and reaching over to grip onto your forearm, “soon, we’ll be thinking about what elementary school to send her off to... and then the next thing you know, we’ll be helping her look for her own apartment when she’s off at university... and then you’ll be going wedding dress shopping with h-”

“stOP stop stop stop-” you wave your hands before covering them over your ears, yoongi laughing lightly when you frown at him, “i don’t want her to turn two! because that means she’s going to turn three… and then she’s going to turn four… and then five, six, seven, eight-” you pause and your eyes suddenly widen in horror, “she’s going to be a sixteen year old one day- what if she turns into a bratty sixteen year old?? because i was a really bratty sixteen year old and i don’t want her to turn out like me! do you know how hard it’s going to be if she turns into me? i used to sneak home at four in the morning-”

“let’s keep in mind that hwayoung is also my daughter and i was not a bratty sixteen year old,” yoongi interrupts calmly before giving your arm a reassuring squeeze, “she’s gonna be fine! and you turned out great, so give yourself a little bit of credit-”

“i just want her to stay two forever.” you pout, crossing your arms stubbornly as you look down the hallway towards her room, “is that too much to ask for??”

“when the terrible twos hit, i guarantee you’re probably going to feel a little different.” yoongi teases, pushing himself up off the banister before gesturing for you to go and join jimin and jungkook downstairs, “why don’t you help jimin out with the balloon arch while i go and wake our little miss two year old up?”

                                      »»————-　🍰　————-««

yoongi presses his lips together tightly as he twists the doorknob, being careful not to make too loud of a sound to accidentally shock hwayoung awake

the last thing he wants is for to burst into tears at the start of her special day

he peers into the bedroom, smiling fondly when he sees a little lump under the covers shuffling a little 

a chubby sock-clad foot pokes out for a second before it disappears again

“이게 누굴까요? [hm… who’s that]?” yoongi asks quietly, the lump suddenly freezing in place, “드디어 일어나셨네요… [i think someone’s finally awake…]”

he tilts his head when a messy head of hair pops out from under the covers, the corners of hwayoung’s mouth immediately lifting in a bright smile when she spots him, “우리 공주 좋은 아침입니다! [oh! good morning, miss min!]”

he lets himself into the room and reaches over to click the white noise machine off before starting to quietly pad his way over to her, his heart melting in his chest when her mouth opens up in a quiet little yawn

“잘 주무떠뜹니까… [gub moming…]” hwayoung murmurs, eyelids fluttering slightly as yoongi reaches down to push some of her hair out of her face

“잘 잤어? [hi, baby… did you sleep well?]” yoongi asks, leaning down to scoop her up, “우리 화영이 생일 축하해… 밑에서 다 기다리고 있어... [happy birthday, my darling… we’re all waiting for you downstairs...]” he whispers, rubbing circles into her warm back when she immediately clings to him, “머리에 물 좀 묻히고 내려갈까? 머리가 아주 산발이네. [why don’t we freshen up a little, hm? the birthday girl can’t take pictures with a bird’s nest on her head.]”

“딴바. [birb’s ness.]”

                                      »»————-　🍰　————-««

“i hope she likes the present i got for her.” jungkook mutters, his foot tapping anxiously against the ground as he looks up towards the top of the stairs in anticipation of hwayoung’s arrival, “i mean, if she doesn’t like it, there’s a receipt in the box so i can return it and get something else for her… but i really hope she likes it.”

“jungkook, she’s two. i gave her a wooden spoon to play with the other day and she was ecstatic.” you snort, peeling an eye open to look at him from where you’re lying on the couch before shutting it again, “i’m sure she’ll love whatever you got for her.”

“what’s the matter with you?” jimin hums, glancing at you for a second before focusing his attention back on sticking the bright pink ‘2’ candle onto the cake, “you look a little out of it today.”

“gee, thanks.” you snort, blindly grabbing one of the throw pillows before hugging it to your chest, “no, i’m fine, i just- i was feeling a little mopey this morning about hwa turning two and now i’m just thinking about how time has just flown by…”

“mm. it seems like it was only yesterday that i was holding your hair back while you violently puked your guts out into the toilet bowl.” jimin jokes, holding a hand to his chest before spinning around to face you and jungkook, “ah… fond memories that i’ll look back on for the rest of my life.”

“you know, i should’ve told yoongi i was pregnant in another way.” you suddenly change the subject, propping yourself up onto your elbows with a frown, “all i did was give him a tiny cookie. how lame is that?!”

“to be fair, you didn’t know how he was going to react, so maybe it was a good thing you went for something so simple!” jimin shrugs, making his way over to you before sticking his hand out for you to take, “c’mon, miss mopey. hwayoung probably doesn’t want to see you throwing yourself a pity party on her special day when she comes down here.”

                                     »»————-　🍰　————-««

“-화영이가 엄마한테가서 이쁜짓 해주는 거 어떨까? [-now, mama is feeling very emotional today, so i think it’d be a really good idea to act extra cute, okay?]” yoongi whispers to hwayoung, planting a quick kiss on her cheek while slowly making his way down the stairs, “of course, that probably isn’t going to be a problem for you, seeing that you’re adorable 24/7-”

“i adowbo.” hwayoung murmurs, leaning down and squishing her cheek against yoongi’s shoulder, “졸려. [i seepy.]”

“졸리다고? [sleepy?]” yoongi pauses on the steps, reaching up to adjust one of her pigtails with a smile, “이거 큰일났네, 졸리면 어떡해! [you can’t be sleepy for your morning conference. look alive!]”

“is that the sleepy little birthday girl?” 

yoongi looks down to see you waiting eagerly at the bottom of the stairs, your hands clasped together and your eyes glued on hwayoung, “good morning!”

“mama!” hwayoung immediately twists around in yoongi’s arms at the sound of your voice, reaching out for you with a teethy grin as soon as yoongi gets close enough to you

“oh, happy birthday, my sweet little baby!“ you coo as you take her into your arms, squishing multiple kisses to her chubby cheek as you hold her close, “happy happy birthday, my beautiful girl…”

“ahppa bouday!” hwayoung giggles, little hands patting against your face

she leans in and smushes her nose against yours before giving you a drooly kiss on the cheek and you can’t help but laugh at how affectionate she’s being with you

see??

you want to keep her like this forever and it sucks to think about the fact that one day you’re going to set her down on the ground after carrying her and you’ll never pick her up again because she won’t need you to pick her up again

:-(

“oh…” you sniffle, suddenly feeling your nose prickle and your eyes starting to get a little tingly, “i love you so much…”

you don’t get much of a chance to say anything else before hwayoung’s suddenly being plucked from your arms, both jimin and jungkook immediately starting to fawn over her as per usual

“우리 화영이, 공주님이 따로 없네! [look at how beautiful you are in your dress!]” jimin exclaims animatedly, hwayoung clapping her hands together in response

her dress is sage green and gingham and it even came with matching ribbons for her hair and you have to admit that jimin made a pretty good choice with this birthday outfit

you probably would’ve stuck her in a pair of overalls or something

“see, what’d i say?” jimin smiles proudly, smoothing down the back of hwayoung’s dress before looking over at jungkook, “i told you the sage green was cuter- 아니 빨간 걸 왜 입혀 뭐 애를 도마로 만들 생각이니- [the red one that you wanted to go with would’ve made her look like a picnic blanket-]”

“아니 도마라니! [red gingham is classy!]” jungkook argues, trailing behind jimin while making faces at hwayoung to get her to laugh, “입혀보지도 않고- [you didn’t even give it a chance-]”

“난 그딴 거 염두에 두지 않는다 정국아- [i don’t need to give tacky garbage a chance, jungkook-]”

“hey, are you okay?” yoongi gives you a quick hug and kiss on the side of your head when he suddenly notices a tear running down your cheek, “she’s just turning two, y/n... she’s not moving out of the country-”

“i know, i know-“ you sniffle, reaching up to quickly wipe at your tears before chuckling, “i guess i’m just feeling extra emotional today-”

“c’mon, parents!” jimin calls out for you two while setting hwayoung down in her high chair, “the candle is melting and this cake is too expensive to get any wax dripped on it-”

“gookee!” hwayoung points to the cake and claps her hands as she bounces up and down on her seat, “gookee, mama!”

“yeah! cookie!” you mimic enthusiastically, smiling widely when she suddenly lets out a high-pitched squeal of excitement, her nose scrunching particularly cutely, “i’m glad to see that you inherited my love for cookies and not appa’s love for muesli.”

yoongi immediately scoffs and reaches down to give your bum a quick swat

“i know she’s saying cookie, but i’m just going to go ahead and say that she’s actually saying the name of her favourite uncle-” jungkook sighs, reaching down to pinch hwayoung’s cheek, “화영이는 꾹이 삼촌 제일 좋아하- [uncle gookee is your forever favourite-]”

“어 응 뉘에- [yeah, okay, whatever helps you sleep at night-]” jimin snorts, shoving the camera into his hands as the four of you stand in front of hwayoung, “okay, don’t touch the cake yet! let’s get some pretty pictures of the birthday girl first!”

“hwa, look into the camera!” jungkook coos, snapping his fingers to get her to look up at him, “그래 삼촌 한 번만 봐 봐- [look at uncle goo- yeah, there we go-]”  

you watch hwayoung fondly as she continues to ham it up for the camera, her little legs kicking in anticipation under the tray

“good girl, you’re being so patient.” you hum before reaching over to pluck a cookie from the open box, “ooh, i’ve been dying to sink my teeth into one of these-” 

“i had one earlier, they’re pretty good!” jimin nods, brushing past jungkook to get to you, “the bakery i ordered them from has, like five out of five stars one google review- hey, what’s that face for?”

“eugh- do the cookies taste a little funky to you?” you face screws up as you swallow the bite before holding the cookie up to take a closer look at it, “it’s just chocolate chip, right?”

“yeah- hold on, lemme try-” jimin frowns, reaching over to steal your cookie before taking a bite of it and chewing thoughtfully

“maybe you just got a weird one?” yoongi suggests, peering into the box with a frown, “all cookies taste funky to me, so my opinion probably isn’t valid here-”

“it’s fine, i’ll try another one later-” you dust your fingers off before perking up and clapping your hands together, “hey, should yoongi and i hop in for some pictures before hwa completely destroys the entire cake?”

“yeah, it… might be a little too late for that.” jungkook clears his throat and the three of you look over to see hwayoung’s tubby arms shoved elbow deep into the cake, “i gave her the green light to go ahead and eat. she just looked so sad and hungry, i’m sorry!”

hwayoung cackles in glee as she continues slapping her hand against the cake, her grubby little hands now sticky and her new dress stained with globs of frosting chocolate

“oh my god.” you stifle a laugh and reach up to cover your mouth so that you don’t burst out laughing at the fact that both jimin and yoongi look absolutely appalled

“i spent, like, ten minutes doing her hair-” yoongi whines, gently nudging you aside so he can hurry over to hwayoung and try to salvage the neat little pigtails he spent forever working on, “and now there’s frosting everywhere!”

“that dress was expensive, jungkook!” jimin snaps, and if you didn’t know any better you’d think he was about to burst into tears, “and i didn’t even get any nice pictures with her before she- come on, man-”

“i’m sorry!”

“ahppy bodday!” hwayoung shrieks in delight and flings her arms up, chunks of cake and specks of frosting flicking out from her hands, “i adowbo!”

👔click here for more ceo!yoongi content (+ hwayoung!)

🎙️help me help you make your wishes come true (send me a request!)

✨why don’t you explore the rest of the library while you’re here? (full fics!)

💫or perhaps you want something shorter to read? (drabbles like this one!)

🌟or something even shorter? (teeny tidbits!)

[roll-da-credits]

Overprotective - Hawks x Reader

Word Count: 1.3k

Request: hi ! if you don’t mind could i request something for hawks?? you can do it as a oneshot or hcs (which ever works for you). basically my idea was that the reader and him work together but reader gets injured. its not even that bad maybe just like a deep cut on their or something but people come to load them into the ambulance and hawks is just in protective birb mode. mans has his wings around them and is glaring at anyone near and reader is just like “pls i just need to get stitches then i’ll be fine dummy”. protective hawks just makes my heart go hnnnggghhh,,

A/n: fun fact of the day, protective Hawks also make my heart go S;DFJLASDFLJA;SDJFA, I love him sm, like he's such a bastard but he's an amazing bastard yk? I mean just look at how absolutely dumb and adorable he looks in the banner❤️ Anyways, thank you so much for the request and I hope you enjoy it!!!

🖤❤️🖤

“Hawks, the situation has gotten a little bit out of hand, they can use an extra hero out there.” One of Keigo’s assistants informed him over the phone.

Before he even replied, he flew quickly over to the site, “I’m already here. Who’s on duty right now?” Keigo released some of his feathers to rescue some civilians, and listen in on whatever ruckus was happening.

“Kamui Woods and H/n, but their quirks aren’t the best fo-” Keigo didn’t even let the woman behind the phone finished before quickly turning off his phone and sending even more of his feathers to scan the area for you.

If he was called in for backup, that meant you and Kamui Woods weren’t able to contain the villain very well. Or it could mean both of you were injured far beyond being able to defeat it. His mind raced trying to listen in on every corner of the danger zone.

The villain wasn’t exactly incredibly destructive or murderous, he was just a criminal with a rather pesky quirk. Being able to create spikes wherever his skin touched and on his hands, led to a lot of bystanders in the busy area getting injured, both Kamui Woods and you, were rather overwhelmed.

“Woods, rescue the civilians, I’ll try to ambush him.” From one of his feathers, he could hear your voice and pinpointed your location before swiftly flying over there.

His eyes landed on yours, and for a brief second, you faltered in your position, rather shocked at seeing Keigo there. This small shock led your ambush to completely failing, the man had enough time to react to your attack.

The spikes on his hands were directed to slash your chest, if it wasn’t for a red feather quickly pushing you back, your chest would’ve been a giant gash by now. Keigo flew down and quickly apprehended the man with his feathers quite easily. Making you slightly scoff behind him.

“Always got to show off huh?” he looked back at you with a small smirk, only for it to immediately falter when he saw your right hand on your shoulder. Blood dripping from your fingers.

“Birdie, I thought you completely dodged it?!” Keigo walked over to you eyes glued on the wound, wings rather puffed up from worry.

“He can extend his spikes you know?” Since Keigo was still looking pretty alarmed, you tried calming his nerves down, “Love, it's literally nothing. I get worse injuries all the time, it’ll probably take 2 stitches and that’s it. I am a bit tired from all the fucking running though.”

You said the last words in a more joking manner and started to head over to an ambulance to get your wounds treated and transported to a hospital to check for any further damage.

That was your plan, before Keigo suddenly picked you up from the ground, his wings taking flight immediately.

“Oi Keigo what the FUCK are you doing?!?!??!?” You yelled, being completely shocked at the fact that a second ago your feet touched the ground, now there was no ground to be seen.

“Who knows if the people in the ambulance were actually working with the thief.”

At this point you were flabbergasted, this man picked you off your feet just because of a deep cut in your SHOULDER, not even your legs, and didn’t want you to deal with paramedics because he was scared of them being the thief’s accomplices.

“You are literally making zero sense.” You let out an exasperated sigh knowing full well Keigo isn’t letting you go any time soon.

Finally arriving at the hospital, Keigo was literally on your tail the entire time. Even when going up to the desk to explain what happened to when you had to explain the circumstances you were in (those circumstances being you didn’t get to the paramedics on sight because of a certain hero).

When one of the nurses came to bring you to another room, Keigo followed once again.

“Excuse me, sir, we need to bring you to a different room to do a check-up on you.” There were a few scratches here and there from the previous fights before your skirmish with the villain. But he completely ignored the nurse. Only fluffing up his wings even more.

“Sir?” “Oh, I’m incredibly sorry, I’d like to say with my little birdie over there.” Keigo gestured towards you who’s being led to sit on a bed before getting stitches.

He came over to stand next to you and hold your hand in his.

“Babe, I’m literally a pro hero, I’ve gotten stitches more times than I can count. It's ok.” You tried reassuring him. Codeword: tried.

When the doctor came in with her tools, Keigo literally glared daggers at her. The room felt like it dropped a couple of degrees and you can feel the doctor getting slightly nervous from the dangerous glare of the rather intimidating hero.

Who wouldn’t be intimidated when an extremely popular hero’s lover was being treated by you?

“Ok no I’m not doing this, babe wait outside.” Keigo immediately looked at you with an offended expression. As if you just insulted him and all of his ancestors before him, “You’re literally intimidating the poor doctor, this will take about 15 minutes and then you can come back in.”

You kept a stern tone to him and he dejectedly, like a child after getting scolded by his mother, walked out the room. Leaving the ‘suspicious’ (at least to him) doctor and you alone.

15 minutes had passed and when the doctor left the room, she was immediately met with the menacing glares of the fastest hero, “They’re ok right?” The doctor stammered trying to answer him, “Uhhh yeah, yeah she’s fine. Its, it's not that deep.”

After answering she immediately paced away from Keigo who was already entering your room.

He took a seat beside your bed laid his head on the crook of your uninjured shoulder, wings lightly fluttering from the joy he was feeling. He had the biggest dopey smile you had ever seen.

“Your wings look really fluffy right now.” You remarked reaching out to caress some of his feathers. They were incredibly soft despite how dangerous of weapons they can be when he wanted them to.

“I was worried, am I not allowed to worry for my incredible birdie?” He cooed to you before wrapping his hands around your waist, peppering kisses all over your face. Causing you to giggle and lightly push him away.

“I’m a pro hero you know, I know when to ask for help.” You held up the feather necklace Keigo gave you, showing you technically could signal him to come to your aid any time if you needed to, “You don’t need to worry about me, pretty boy.”

The dopey smile somehow grew much more into a heartwarming one. He climbed onto the hospital bed, snuggling with you on it, was it slightly uncomfortable? Sure. But you wouldn’t have to stay here for that long anyway, so why not just have a little calming cuddle session.

Keigo, feeling your head on his chest, his hand tangling itself on your hair, and his other hand holding firmly on your waist, reminded himself. You will be okay. He doesn’t always need to baby you. You’re perfectly capable of doing things.

“Hey, birdie?” You hummed in reply, “Sorry for how weird I acted.” You snorted, weird was an understatement.

“It was cute seeing you overprotective though.” With that Keigo’s laughter filled your ears. Like a soft calming tune.

It was weirdly serene, bandages all over your left shoulder, the sun lightly setting, and an amazing man (bird? Man-bird?) in your arms.

[sashi-ya]

Hiya ! If requests are still open for this week could I ask for Marco with a tiny fem!s/o with a size kink ??? Thank you so much and hope you’re having a great day 💕💕💕

Hi darling!! Of course! I hope you like it ♥ Thank u for your request and all of the support! Have a great weekend ♥ ~

NSFW ~ Marco x F! Tiny! Reader ~ You Are So Tight For Me ~

TW: NSFW. Size kink. Best friends to lovers. Sex at a party. Unprotected sex. Kind of rough sex.

WC: 1.7K

Tag list: @undercoverweeeb @mistyroselove

Marco and you have always been good friends, really good friends. You love him as much as he loves you, yet, you too never ever had any romantic or sexual interaction before. You are so close, people usually think you two are a couple, yet you aren’t. Still…

You > Oiiii pineapple birb, are you up for tonight’s party at Izo’s? Pineapple Birb > Oi Tontatta, yeah. Be ready at 8.

“Tontatta? What does he mean with “Tontatta”??... OH…” you say while throwing the phone to the bed and realizing he was mocking you by your short height. “You fucking giant pineapple…” you grunt as you enter the shower.

-----

The sound of Marco’s pick up horn announces he is already waiting for you outside. You take your bag and keys and head out.

“G’Night” you say, struggling to enter the vehicle. “Why the hell did he buy such a big car?” you think while stretching your arm to close the door. Of course, you fail in the first attempt so the doctor bends over you and closes the door. Marco is not huge but compared to you it’s pretty big. He pats your lap, strongly, laughing. “Why the hell are you so tiny?” he says. And you can’t help but squirm a little on the seat thinking about his huge hand over your thigh in a friendly way that you wish was with other intentions.

Rolling your eyes you tell him to stop making fun of you and start driving. “Fineee” he says and hits the gas. Music blasting suddenly makes you forget about the touch of his hand over your thigh and you two sing -shout- “Good 4 U” by Olivia Rodrigo.

Marco parks over Izo’s house. He descends the pick-up and helps you. “Jump to pappa” he says, laughing. You frown and burn holes into his eyes. “Shut up” you say as he snatches you from under your shoulders and puts you down on the street. You are surprised, he has never helped you like this. Still, you act annoyed, “Who does he think he is to treat me like this?” you think.

Walking towards the door, you can see from the window the shadow of a boy wearing a straw hat running around. “Luffy” Marco and you say, laughing.

The night goes by with alcohol and food, so much food. Sanji cooked the equivalent of three full restaurants just for you -specially Luffy-. Everybody is a little tipsy, and so do you. Kiku, Izo’s sister, comes up with the idea of watching a horror movie. Everybody, except Chopper and Usopp agreed. Law and Robin decided the title, and oh boy, that was gore…

The boys set up the projector, and everybody takes his place. Sanji and Zoro begin fighting because apparently, they were “too close to each other” on the couch. Everybody look at them thinking the same, “why the fuck do you sit together if you don’t want to be close?” but then all of you remember they haven’t still figured out how much they love each other. So, for the sake of the group’s peace, Marco suggests that you could sit over his lap, and so they will have more room.

You agree instantly and sit over Marco’s legs. Your back laying over his chest. You are so used to him that this doesn’t represent a problem for you. But then, Marco snakes his arms around your waist and presses you tight against his lap. “What is this boy playing tonight?” you think.

Somehow, the idea of feeling so tiny, so squeezed against his body is making your core feel a little… fancy.

The movie starts, and so far, you haven’t gotten scared until the murderer appears out of nowhere and stabs the victim from his back. You jump over Marco’s lap, so suddenly that he also gets scared. “Shh” he whispers in your ear. A shiver runs through your spine, as you feel Marco’s warm breath on your neck. “Sorry…” you excuse yourself. “It’s ok” he says, and rests his chin over your shoulder, squeezing your waist even tighter. You gasp and fidget your ass over his groin. “Fuck it, he wants me” you think. And indeed, you feel how a hard -huge- bulge grows under your bottom… All of a sudden, a different movie plays on your head, the idea of him fucking you with his huge member makes you wet, so wet.

You start to act scared with every little scene, and with that, a little hump over him that makes his member grow harder and harder. No one will notice, everything is dark, they are all into the movie. And with the last little jump, Marco has had enough “Stop doing that or I’ll have to fuck you right here in front of our friends” he whispers. You swallow, you wanted to turn him on, but you’ve never expected he would be so straightforward to you.

You slowly turn around your face, his nose touching your cheek. “Then fuck me if you dare” you tell him. A sexy side smirk draws on his lips, and his hands pressed your lower belly so your sex could feel perfectly how hard he is. You realize you are probably gonna have a big time when taking him all inside, and that fans the fire inside you. “I’m gonna go to the restroom” you tell him, with an inviting grin. He lets go of you, and you walk upstairs.

A few minutes later, the bathroom opens and Marco looks at you up and down, scanning you with lustful eyes. You sexily take your jacket off and let it fall to the ground. He closes the door behind him and walks steadily towards you.

His right hand squeezes your throat. His left leg in between your legs, lifting you up as your back is pressed against the cold tiles of the bathroom. “Come on, hump over my leg now” Marco says. You try to gasp for air and do as he tells you to. You rub your sex against his thigh, your legs hang at each side. He is so big compared to you…

He then grabs you by your waist and sits you over the bathroom counter. You spread your legs, so he can come closer. His mouth invades yours, lustfully, feral. This felt way better than the times you’ve dreamt of it.

When he is satisfied with the taste of your mouth, he lifts you up. You cross your legs around his waist and Marco carries you to the next room. Who knows whose room it is? but you don’t care… He throws you to bed, you lay on your back while he unbuttons his white shirt. You enjoy the show of the big man in front of you, your body begs to be destroyed, to be fucked.

“Marco…” you mumble. “Hm?” he asks. “Fuck me, rough” you tell him. “You sure? I’m afraid I’ll destroy your insides” he says while leaning over you, already taking off your pants. “That’s exactly what I want” you say and bite your lip. “You little whore” he says laughing and pounces into you.

He bites your neck; you carve your nails on his back. His huge hands take off your shirt, exposing your perfect body to him. “God, why are you so tiny? I’m gonna rip you” he says, with one of your nipples on his mouth. You moan as his tongue wets your breasts.

He then traces a path of wet smooches from your tits towards your sex. He licks and kisses your hot skin, and you squirm. Yet, you are anxious to see his member, you’ve been wanting to see that huge dick in front and inside you for so long…

A finger enters your sex. “Oh, even my finger feels tight inside you… I wonder how I am gonna fuck your little cunt?” he asks, and that turns you so fucking much, he has no idea. Then, the second finger in. Slowly, but surely you dilate enough -or so that’s what you thought- to receive his shaft.

“I think I can manage to fuck you like this” Marco says while lowers the zipper of his jeans. You swallow, you want it inside now. He finally flashes his eight inches dick to you. You widen your eyes and he notices it. “Are you sure?” he asks. “Fucking destroy me, Marco” you tell him, delighted by the huge member in front of your eyes.

“Sure, my dear” he says, and aligns the tip of his dick with your entrance. You are so wet that it slides perfectly and even if Marco tries to hold back not to hurt you, he can’t take it any longer. Soon, he is balls deep inside you. You whine, loud enough for the whole house to hear you. “Shhh, little whore” he shushes you and covers your mouth with his hand.

You feel your walls stretch, they burn, but you love it. A bulge forms in your lower stomach whenever he is deep inside you, you watch it and the image makes both of you extremely aroused. He is indeed destroying your tiny body, and you are enjoying every single moment of it.

And after intense thrusts, your insides clenches around him as you are ready to fall into an intense orgasm. “Mhh babe… you are so tight. Even after fucking you so much” Marco whines. You moan as the last deep plunges send you to climax heaven. You squirt on the base of his dick, so hard, relieving the pressure, biting Marco’s shoulder.

He does the same a few seconds after, and he does not back off until your insides get filled fully with his warm seed…

“So, are we dating now?” he finally speaks, while resting after an amazing fuck. “Well, yeah, finally” you tell him and laugh soundly. Everybody knew that, except you two…

“We should come back, don’t you think?” you say. “I hope they didn’t hear us…” Marco tells you kissing your forehead… ♥ ~

[signedaiko]

Coffee Birb here! Wanted to let you know you did awesome on the other requests I sent!

I thought it’d be cool to ask for more headcanons of the Energon creating bot but in other continuities, and if you’re fine with it to have each continuity as a separate post to prevent confusion. For this one in particular, what would your headcanons be if the DJD and Nickel found the Energon bot instead? Same backstory for the bot remains.

Helex [MTMTE]

- When Helex wasn't killing individuals on the list, one of his jobs was to map out places they've been and discover fuel - He managed to target a large cluster of dormant energon crystals near one of their expeditions - Considering he was one of the strongest, he heaved a lot of the energon out of the way and onto the ship while Tes worked on retrieving you - It took both of the bigger cons to crack open the stasis pod considering it was crystalized - When you are on the ship and healing, he is strictly advised to stay at a distance - Energon was flammable, so you and he mixing could end horribly for the ship and crew - Still, he took it upon himself to watch over and protect you at a distance - He comes up with the geeky name 'Dynamite duo' for you both

Kaon [MTMTE]

- Being the main one to maintain the list, Kaon was on the lookout for spark signatures - He was the one that pointed out that there was not only energon but a spark signature inside of it - The weirdest part was that whoever was in there was still alive - It was a large cluster, so he and the Pet scouted around it until the Pet found you - The first thing he asked when you were woken up in Nickels's office was the hardest thing for you to answer - " Are they a con? " - " ...Con? " - Vos was right; you really had been dormant for well over 4 million years! - When Nickel mentioned you need a badge, he actually gave some of his own spark casing for it

Nickel [MTMTE]

- Watched over you being broken free to ensure you wouldn't be harmed in the process - The energon was important too, but it could survive any blows you give it - However, you looked fragile - Nickel ended up caring you back into health and fighting off the never-ending crystals that grew from you - Soon, all of your fuel lines were fixed, so the crystals could only grow from your servos and pedes - Nickel accepted you as a deception but explained that your spark was too fragile to produce a badge from - Kaon did offer up his own (simp), so now you wear one made of his casing!

Tarn [MTMTE]

- Gave the command to go retrieve you, two birds with one stone anyhow - Tarn cared onto to stand back and observe as everyone set in motion gathering the energon as well as freeing their new prisoner - You were an outlier like him now, which in itself made you dangerous - But the leader wouldn't stop himself from trying to recruit a new con, thus took it upon himself to be the one to give you a history lesson - There wasn't a lie, but you could say he may or may have not had a tad of a bias- but the con badge looked perfect on you! - You know the Cyclonus, Tailgate and Magnus part where Tailgate is tricked to think cons are better? The same thing happens when Nickel re explains - You remain a con anyhow; they did save you after all

Tesarus [MTMTE]

- Was the one to break you out, as he had quite a few drills and ways to break you free from your near eternal imprisonment - Consider him the gentle giant, as he was the one to carry you back to the ship and to the medibay so Nickel could save you - You got pretty close as friends after your initiation, considering whenever you walked somewhere and got too emotional, he would help you chip off all the energon - Was the one to talk Vos out of the idea of torturing you so you would mass-produce energon, as it seems it works faster in emotional distress - As thank you for him helping you all the time, you offered to sharpen up his blades for him, so he didn't get an ear full every time he had a checkup with Nickel

Vos [MTMTE]

- Being a chemist himself, Vos was the one to realize the nature of your abilities - First, he carbon-dated the crystals closest to you, which were given or take 5.4 million years old - Then he observed the crystals that continued to grow on you even after you awoke, which demonstrated fresh, natural energon signatures - He didn't expect you to understand, so he explained to tarn his hypothesis - Only, you were just as old as Vos and very well versed in old cybertronian too - A rough translation follows - " You mean...everyone I know is dead? " - " If they chose the wrong side :)." - He wasn't really the kindest around, but later on, he did tell you that many cybertronians from pre-war are still alive and that he was joking - Maybe

—————-

Authors Note - Me nervously sliding you this after 2 months with a foolish little smile :] They love they energon bot. Also I'm gonna get u ur own tag so it's easier for you...and a few other anons

[mrultra100]

Ultra’s Prehistoric Planet Reviews- Episode 2: Deserts

And we’re back! Due to Prehistoric Planet’s 5 episodes airing on each day of this very week, we’re gonna be taking a crack at all of ‘em on each day. For today’s dive into the Maastrichtian, we’re gonna be trekking through the various sandy dunes of the Prehistoric Planet, where we’ll meet such critters like dueling titanosaurs, femboy pterosaurs, and the feathery sensation that’s sweeping the nation (Hey, that rhymed!). It’s now time to visit the hot, sweltering, vastness of the Deserts.

Right off the bat, this episode was just as good as I'd hoped for. The CGI is as good as the rest of the show, the animals feel like and expressive, we got a whole host of creatures both new and familiar to us, Han Zimmer’s score was bangin’ (As usual), and I had a pretty good time with it overall. The only critique that I have is that some of the creatures aren’t referred to by name, mainly the watering hole segment. While Barsboldia, Tarbosaurus, and the Mongolian titan were referred to by name, the names of the other animals in this scene haven’t. You can also see a couple of large azhdarchids (Though, to be fair; They might be the Mongol Giant, a species that doesn’t have a true name yet), some small ankylosaurs (People are theorizing that they might be Tarchia), another, smaller titanosaur (Might be Nemegtosaurus) and even Therizinosaurus. Thankfully, Darren Naish has confirmed that the latter will make a few more appearances in the series, so consider this an early-bird cameo for now (In this case, literally).

Now going into each segment, we start off with, frankly, one of the largest creatures to ever live on land; Dreadnoughtus. It’s honestly satisfying to see an obscure species rise up to the likes of T. Rex and Velociraptor in terms of mainstream media, and a fairly recently discovered one at that. Hell, even Jurassic World’s playing a huge part in this. Going back to the segment, it features male Dreadnoughtus traveling to a mating colony of females, where the size each other up and go full-blown elephant seal on each other; Slamming their necks into one another, biting, puncturing with the spur-like claws on their front legs, it ain’t pretty. And those inflatable sacks on the sides of their necks make it even more intense. What’s even more intense than sauropods finally being shown as the walking disaster that they are, is the fact that the losers get beaten from their fights so hard, they just straight-up DIE. Momma Nature is pretty hardcore, especially when sex is involved (That’s something the ammonites taught us in the last episode too.).

We then cut to the deserts of Mongolia, we experience one, massive segment in 3 parts. The first is about the famous Velociraptor trying to hunt lizards, who in term, are trying to hunt bugs. There’s a catch, however. The bugs are flocking to a bunch of sleeping Tarbosaurus, who’ve just finished eating a massive carcass. The lizards, who see an opportunity, try and risk getting near to the sleeping giants in order to score some lunch. This gets even more dangerous when the Velociraptors try and pick them off. Eventually, the Tarbosaurus do wake up and scare off the raptors, with the big lugs moving on. This lets the pterosaurs flying overhead to come down and finish what’s left of the carcass.

Part 2 then cuts over to another stretch of the desert, where we meet the apparent star of the show; Mononykus. From what I’ve seen, people LOVE this segment, and the lil’ scrunky birb. And I can see why; It’s a delightful few minutes of the the lovable fluffball hunting termites with her big single claws and long, anteater-like tongue, dealing with seasonal flowers for the first time, and not having a clue on what the hell is going on. David even mutters a lil’ “Oh dear” in this scene, and that was the icing on the cake! This is another one of the show’s scenes that’s gonna be going into the “Absolute bangers” tier. And this ain’t even the last we see of Mononykus in this episode...

And that’s because we’re at the ending of the Mongolian trilogy (Well, at least in this episode). Not only do herds of Barsboldia and the Mongolian titan show up to drink at this massive water hole, but so do more of the azhdarchids we saw earlier, desert ankylosaurs, Theriznosaurus, and yes, Mononykus. A Tarbosaurus even gets to appear in this part, coming over for a drink...That still doesn’t stop everyone else from giving the beast a wide berth. If you’re gonna give an apex predator some space, be polite about it.

And now, ladies, gentlemen, and others; Femboy pterosaurs. Remember the Barbaridactylus from the last episode? Well, they’re back! And, they’re gettin’ it on! Similar to how alot of animals alive today do the same thing, some of the smaller males use their female-like appearance to sneak past their larger, created counterparts, giving them enough time to knock up a female. Honestly, considering how this episode has femboy pterosaurs, this is definitely a win for the LGBTQ+ community.

For our last segment for the episode (And of this review, too), we’re talkin’ extremophile hardosaurs! This is the first ever media appearance of Secernosaurus, a hadrosaur species from the ever-shifting and changing gypsum deserts of South America. Since gypsum can only occur in the driest places on Earth due to how easily it can dissolve in water, the few animals that live here are extremophiles, and Secernosaurus is no exception. To make things easier, the herd moves at night, where it’s not only cooler, but they can use the stars to locate where they are. These are really helpful skills to have on standby, especially when they reach a coastal dune filled with water to lick off their bodies (Gross.) and plenty of plants to chow down on. It’s only temporary, but it’s a lifesaver for these creatures.

If you’re tired of all of this heat, then you’re in luck. Our next review will be covering the Freshwaters of the Prehistoric Planet. You might wanna bring some bug spray, just in case a bunch of blood-sucking flies take a liking to you...

Also, #TeamMononykus4Life, yo!

[itsclydebitches]

RWBY Recaps: Volume 8 “Creation”

Happy Saturday, everyone! Oh man, oh man, oh man. I think I'll need to steer clear of the general RWBY tags this week, simply because I know the sort of responses I'll see to this episode. From smug celebration at Ironwood's downfall, to bad takes about what makes us human, this episode is a petri dish of sensitive material handled insensitively.

Let’s unpack it, shall we? 

We open on an action that feels like a summery of the last three volumes: a grimm attacks an airship from the front, no doubt killing its pilot, while the other grimm conveniently ignore our heroes, no masking in sight. The group looks a little sad at the destruction around them, but ultimately ignore it because they have bigger, heroic things to do. I could write a whole, additional essay on how the huntsmen code — to protect the people — has been warped and abandoned by our protagonists in their effort to do what they think is right. It's a tale that might have been compelling if only RT knew they were writing it.

We get a shot of Atlas drones unloading the bomb before one is taken out, presumably by Qrow and Robyn. Segueing to Ironwood and the Ace Ops, they're waiting for Penny to arrive, the former carrying a massive gun presumably capable of capturing her. Despite the horror we saw on their faces last episode at the realization that Ironwood would kill Marrow for speaking up, it seems that now the Ace Ops are entirely in agreement with these measures. A week ago the implication was that they fell back in line out of fear, but now Harriet talks passionately about "putting down" the group if they were stupid enough to accompany Penny. "The General gave his terms." Vine sighs at this, but doesn't actively disagree. He's just "retracing the steps that led us here."

So, congratulations on introducing four new characters, not bothering to develop any of them, killing one off while ignoring Qrow's hand in that, and having the other three become all, "Yeah! Mass murder is a perfect solution!" off screen. Marrow is the only one with something resembling development and, as covered in these recaps, that's been pretty badly executed too.

Ironwood sends them to deal with Robyn and Qrow after Winter reappears to "assist" him. That gets quotation marks because most viewers at this point have realized that she's who our two birbs spotted in the elevator. Winter isn't on Ironwood's side anymore, she's just skillfully clearing the field for the final attack. Indeed, we get a moment where she hesitantly brings up the bomb and Ironwood responds that he hopes she's not going to try and talk him out of it. No. Winter doesn't think that's possible. This was her final attempt at peace.

One of the reasons why I think I'll stick to my own blog for a while is because the fandom has a tendency to paint broad personality traits as evil when applied to some characters, yet simultaneously heroic when applied to others, when really it's about how that those traits are used. What I mean is, I've seen a lot of Ironwood critical posts that emphasize how stubborn he is. He thinks he's right and he won't back down. He wont listen to others. He's going through with this plan and if anyone tries to stop him? That's their mistake. Totally evil, right? Except, this is the exact same behavior Ruby displays, particularly in Volumes 6 and 7. She was stubborn about stealing from Argus and continuing the fight to the point where it endangered her and her teammates, to say nothing of the rest of the city. She refused to listen to Qrow, or Ironwood, or the Ace Ops, loudly announcing that she was right about, well, everything. If they didn't agree with her, the options were to leave the group entirely, or fight her. The actual difference here is that the writers have taken Ironwood to an extreme, one that's incredibly easy to understand as bad because it is bad: bombing Mantle has no defense. Ruby pulls the exact same nonsense, it's just not to that same extreme and her actions are followed by scenes that are meant to make us forgive her: a sad look because she didn't mean to get a city attacked by a leviathan grimm, a cry on the staircase because she didn't mean to risk the lives of an entire kingdom... even though she did. Ironwood is the bad guy because he's been written to take specific, OOC actions like shooting unarmed kids. He's not the bad guy because when other characters go, "Don't do this" his response is, "I have to." Because that's been Ruby's motto ever since she "had" to use the Lamp to rip Ozpin’s life story away. RWBY introduced those extreme actions of shooting the youngest in the group (for no reason) and threatening to bomb a city (for no reason) or shooting a councilman (for no reason) because when you remove those you've got a man who looks exactly like our hero. Ironwood's arc has been peppered with these confusing, unpersuasive actions because if you just keep the story as him stubbornly keeping to a plan he thinks will save the world, you're left with the reminder that all Ruby has done lately is stubbornly keep to plans she thinks will save the world. This moment with Winter just highlights how ill thought out Ironwood's descent has been because he does everything Ruby does... with a few, tacked on, “and randomly shoots people!” moments to ensure we understand that he’s definitely evil. No comparison to our heroes here, folks! 

Ironwood is a bad guy now. That’s certain, but he was made that way so the story never had to grapple with the question of what that means for Ruby if we really start condemning things like lying, secrets, stubbornness, or endangering others for the greater good. Well then damn, if we strip away the hypocrisy then she might not be a good person after all. Or the people she’s simplistically labeled as bad might not be the devils Ruby claims they are. 

But that’s a level of nuance RWBY would rather pretend doesn’t exist. 

All of which is highlighted by Ironwood’s reaction to "Penny." He sighs and sags over the gun, immediately putting it aside. With his hand on her shoulder, Ironwood tells her she's "done the right thing." Precisely the same way Ruby would lower Crescent Rose and give someone a smile when they decided to fall in line with her.

Which, of course, is the moment when Emerald reveals herself, dispelling the Penny illusion and revealing Team JNPR The Second behind her. She gives a quip about it feeling "weird" to do the right thing before disappearing.

From there the action picks up fast. I really enjoyed this battle simply from a choreography and energy standpoint. It gets the blood pumping, Ironwood's hand-to-hand is spectacular — especially that moment against Ren — and the group actually displays teamwork for the first time in what feels like forever, all of them needed to land a hit on Ironwood. As always, out of the context of the rest of the show it feels and looks great. My primary issue is that we get this fantastic fight against Ironwood. Not Salem, not Cinder, not Watts (like last volume when Ironwood was still a hero), not even Emerald as a means of transitioning from murderous villain to the group's best bud. No, what's arguably the best action sequence in the volume thus far goes to beating up the guy they betrayed from the start. There's no catharsis for me here, only frustration as we watch Ironwood stand in shock as Winter powers up Nora — who's fine now, I guess — and she slams her hammer into his face. 

It never should have come to this and when a good character is done so dirty, their downfall doesn't evoke the emotions the writers are looking for. Watching Ironwood fall doesn't generate feelings of victory, or even tragedy at a course of events others were powerless to stop. It's just frustration at watching years worth of bad writing, sprinkled with fantastic ideas that never go anywhere.

Oscar gets a few hits in, Ironwood snatches his cane, and just as he's about to throw a punch, Winter arrives with the most dramatic sword slash I've ever seen.

Ironwood's aura breaks and he falls, unconscious. We cut to an image of a droid's head separated from its body, one of Robyn's arrows through its skull. That doesn't have meaning or anything.

I suppose I should be grateful they didn't rip Ironwood's arm away during the fight, or outright kill him, though I'm still expecting him to die before the end of the volume.

Hmm. Wouldn't that be something? If after Salem's arrival, freezing cold, a Hound attack, grimm soup, a giant whale, a massive army, and a hack ending in self-destruction, the one character who actually dies is Ironwood. 

It's looking more and more likely.

Honestly, beyond all the obvious, what's so frustrating about this fight is that characters are only now using their impressive abilities to their fullest. Emerald creates an entire fantasy of what's happening and then straight up disappears, but she only does a half-assed version of that when fighting against Penny. (And really, she put more effort into helping the heroes she just joined over Cinder, the woman she's been obsessed with since the start?) Marrow refuses to use "Stay" against a group they wanted to peacefully arrest because that's just too horrible an act, I guess, but he'll do it on his own teammates the second Qrow and Robyn don’t want to fight.  

This is what I mean when I say the rules of the world bend to assist the protagonists in absurd ways. It's not nearly as egregious as Amity suddenly being up and running, but the fact that characters become substantially more powerful while fighting for the protagonists than they do against them is still a significant problem.

So Ironwood is down and out. As much as I hated watching that and didn't necessarily want more, am I the only one who felt like it was... a bit lackluster? I mean, the action was great, yes, but relatively short. There was no dialogue, such as another delve into the moral questions that led to this fight in the first place. There certainly wasn’t any hesitance against fighting a former ally. (Again, we’re meant to believe that the Ace Ops won because they just couldn’t bear to fight the group seriously, but every former ally here is capable of wailing on Ironwood without a single pause or pained look?) Ironwood just skillfully blocks for a while, is blindsided by Winter's betrayal, and then falls unconscious. Given that we learn he and Jacques will be evacuated after the rest of the kingdom, it's possible he'll escape somehow and we'll get a fight 2.0, but if not that feels like a rather tame end to the guy forced into the antagonist seat. Plus, what was the point of having Qrow frothing at the mouth to kill him this whole volume? I never wanted that to happen, I'm glad it hasn't, but I'm nevertheless left to ask why we bothered with that eleven episode side plot if we were going to erase it with one sentence from Robyn about Qrow being better than this. If that's all it took, let them work through Qrow's irrational anger while sitting around in a cell.

Winter tells the group to move onto "phase two" which is when we're treated to a flashback. We return to the ending of the last episode, with Ruby realizing that opening the vault is an option. Jaune, all smiles, goes, "We never considered using what's inside!"

This is what I mean about no consequences! This is what I mean about it all being a meaningless circle that ends with undeserved praise for the group! We started this horror show with Ironwood going, "We don't have a plan to protect the people, so I'm going to take what people we do have to safety" and the group going, "We don't have a plan either, but we're going to stop you implementing your plan because it's not perfect, risking a kingdom's worth of lives in the process." Now, the group has used two plans, one of which two characters knew about at the start and another they could have devised with the information they had. Oscar and Ozpin's, "We have an all powerful magical blast in our cane" and the group's "What if we used the Staff for something other than raising Atlas?" are both things that could have come up in the office debate. These were both always on the table! Instead, Ruby grew furious over the mere thought of cutting their losses, betrayed Ironwood again, attacked his people, denounced him to the world, and then two days later goes, "Oh wait! We could do something now that we could have easily done before if we hadn't made a needless enemy!" 

Everyone realizes how much worse they made things, right? Turning against Ironwood, bringing everyone left in Mantle directly under Atlas, sitting around while an army was devoured, drawing it out until Penny was hacked... all of it would have been avoided if the group had thought and discussed things for a few minutes, not jumping straight to violently resisting what Ironwood came up with first. "We never considered..." Ruby says. Yeah, you didn't, except that's not something to smile about. The group made the situation a thousand times worse with their reaction when they could have just magically evacuated the kingdom from the start. “Maybe we could use it to save Penny and get everyone in Atlas and Mantle back to safety." Nothing has changed! They had this ability the whole time! Nothing about the last twelve episodes led them here, they just randomly thought of it after RT had padded the volume with needless drama. Considering that they're heading to Vacuo now, we could have just made this the finale of Volume 7 instead: big fight with Ironwood, revelation, get everyone  evacuated while Salem attacks, leave her behind, then Volume 8 begins in Vacuo with the group knowing Salem is out there looking for them. This entire volume has been pointless. What did they accomplish?

Oscar got kidnapped and beat up, Nora was scarred, Ruby and Yang realized horrible things about Summer, and the whole world is panicking about a witch. Good things are... Ren and Ruby unlocked some semblance stuff? Weiss loves her brother again after he proved himself useful to her? Great work, team.

So this one moment makes everything they've done up to this point useless and, of course, once thought up the plan goes off without a hitch. Note that the summary of this episode says, "It's risky, dangerous, and nearly impossible — but it's the only plan they've got." Nearly impossible? That's a whole lot of talk for a plan that was implemented perfectly.

There is, admittedly, one snag, but one that is likewise made meaningless just seconds later. We'll get to that.

We see Winter call Weiss who also smiles at hearing from her sister. Obviously interactions like the group's with Emerald are the bigger concern, but it's still an issue that no one reacts as they should to people reappearing in their lives. Rather, RWBY continually confuses audience knowledge with character knowledge. We know Winter is on their side now, but Weiss hasn't a clue. Last she saw, she and Winter were agreeing to head down different paths. She has no reason to think her sister isn't loyal to Ironwood, so why isn't the group treating this call with suspicion? What if it's Ironwood trying to mess with them through a presumably safe party? I swear to god, with any consistency in the story this group would be dead ten times over because their decisions are so stupid. Oscar decides to believe in the guy currently beating him to a pulp, the group decides to trust a villain over a flawed ally, and now they see Ironwood’s second calling and are like, “Great, big sister Winter is checking in!” There’s a difference between a hopeful story filled with second chances and characters whose reliance on the narrative bending to assist them makes them come across as insanely naive. 

None of which even touches on characters forgetting that other characters are presumably dead. Ironwood shot Oscar off the edge of Atlas, but doesn't react to learning he was kidnapped, or when he shows up to the fight. Thanks to Marrow's comment, Winter thinks YJOR have perished in the whale, but also has no reaction to them appearing to help with this plan. Absolutely nothing is followed up on.

We then get a flashback within the flashback (fun) of Winter — shock — not arresting Marrow. It's precisely as I assumed, with Marrow angrily asking why she hit him and Winter responding with, “Because you were about to get killed if I didn’t do something!” As I said last recap, I feel like I should let the marginalized groups lead this discussion, but I do want to add that no matter how well intentioned — or strategic, as I mentioned last time — the imagery itself is still harmful. No matter the context, we were still left with white woman Winter putting her knee on black man Marrow's back to arrest him, and it’s an image that everyone in the U.S. should be familiar with the horror of. Far more of a problem than the (presumed) ignorance of this scene is, I think, the choice to make Winter entirely unrepentant. I think some of this discomfort could have been alleviated if RT had written Winter as apologetic, contrite that it came to that and asking Marrow to understand that she only did it as a means of assisting him. Asking his forgiveness. Instead, we get this

So what, the only emotion we have room for is gratitude that Winter beat him up? Yikes.

As a lighter side note, I find the animation here unintentionally hilarious. Winter's assistive device makes her shoulders look too high, making this gesture more, "Woman exaggeratedly pouts about not getting ice cream for dinner" and less, "Woman sternly closes off during a disagreement about saving lives and betraying their general." Gotta find our humor where we can, right?

What's intentional, but far less funny, is the needless animation to show us that, yes, Marrow is peering at Winter calling Weiss. Oh, the shenanigans. 

The elevator opens where Qrow and Robyn spot them. "Speaking of help," Winter says, as if she has any reason to believe Qrow didn't kill Clover. He and Robyn lower their weapons a bit, as if they have any reason to believe Winter and Marrow aren't still loyal to Ironwood. Would it really be so hard to have Winter immediately throw up her hands in the face of their almost-attack, blurting that she's not their enemy and needs their help, please listen? Again, RWBY can't remember which characters know what, let alone what their motivations and reactions should be.

We then enter the third part of the flashback where everyone piles into the Schnee dining room and discusses doing the things they could have done from the start. I'm metaphorically banging my head against that table. In RWBY's favor though, we also get a long shot of Jaune continuing to boost Penny’s aura.

Though it's only one of many issues, just the other day I asked, "Hey, why has Jaune always needed to hold onto the person he's assisting, but now suddenly he can touch Penny once and the boost remains?" It still doesn't explain why he was letting go before/why him needing to boost her continuously didn't put a hard time limit on their plan — not that Mantle's hour limit meant a thing — but at least they're showing more of that here.

Oscar notes that Atlas has enough gravity dust that it won't fall immediately when they use the Relic, but they will have to move fast to ensure no one is underneath. Yeah, like all the civilians you put there. He also cautions that the Staff isn't a "magic wand" that they can just wave to make all their problems go away... even though that's precisely what they're going to do. Ozpin gets some lines that aren't apologies or followed by attacks — hallelujah! — about how the Staff's spirit is a "character" and requires that you be able to precisely explain anything you want him to make. Blueprints, examples, a firm knowledge of how this will be accomplished — all of it is required to actually get what you're after. That's a cool limitation. It's just too bad we didn't know about it episodes ago, forcing our heroes to find ways to meet those requirements. Instead, they already have everything ready to go the moment they learn about it: Penny has her own schematics and Whitley apparently has knowledge of the entire kingdom after sending some ships out. Normally I'd go, "Really?" but I'm still just struck by how much good he's done compared to everyone else in this room. Your show is seriously broken when the side character the writers didn't even want the audience to like until a few episodes ago is more active, mature, and sensible than the heroes.

From there we see the group implementing the plan. They fly up through the hole Oscar left, straight to the vault. Penny opens it without any trouble and Ruby uses her speed to grab the Relic and stop time, halting her self-termination. I do like that combination of skill and their knowledge of how this magic works. That felt like a smart move. What's interesting though is that the Relic appears to stop time in the entire kingdom. We see people in Mantle and Atlas slowing to a halt too. I assume no one remembers that happening after time restarts, otherwise people would be freaked out by suddenly being frozen in place.

Wouldn't that have been cool though? The group often takes a while to use the Relics, either deciding what they need, or watching Jinn's information, so what if you had a population that blinks and suddenly, from their perspective, half an hour has passed? How long might Ozpin have sat on his knees after Jinn told him he wasn't able to defeat Salem? How long was that space frozen? We could have had a world built around rumors and fairy tales. Not the random stories Ozpin brings up to make a point and that we never hear about again, but tiny details that foreshadow these revelations. A Beacon where the kids tell each other spooky stories of people suddenly losing time, once a whole day. The wives, sisters, daughters, and nieces who disappear, or wake up one day with horrifying, unnatural powers. We see magic influence the world around it, but we've seen very little of the world reacting to that influence. The one time I can think of is Blake reading a book about "a man with two souls," the fiction clearly inspired by knowledge of Ozpin. And indeed, it felt great to recognize that as a significant detail and then be proven right years later as the lore was revealed. We could have gotten so much more of that if RWBY was better planned out.

I'm getting off track though. As time stops we see a series of images: Ironwood being led to a cell with Jacques, Penny succumbing to her hack, Team JNPR The Second preparing to contact the kingdom about what's going on. Then everyone is distracted by the giant, blue, buff Ambrosius who comes out of the Staff.

...there's a lot of innuendo in that last statement lol. At least RWBY is committed to the crazy design they chose? I was never particularly comfortable with the image of characters gaping up at a giant, naked woman in chains, so it's nice to balance that a bit with an equally giant, naked dude in chains.

From here things get confusing. In all honesty, I'm not sure if this is another moment where RWBY is trying to pass off a retcon as the group being brilliant, or if I, as an individual, simply didn't follow the logic. I won't bother to rehash the slow, meandering way that Ruby reveals their plan — that certainly didn't help with the clarity. Not in an episode where we didn’t even know these rules ahead of time — but it boils down to this:

The moment they have Ambrosius create something new Atlas will start to fall. Two of his creations can't exist at the same time.

He needs clear instructions about what he's making in order to create it.

The group has brought him Penny's schematics so that he understands how she's built.

They want, specifically, "a new version of her... using her exact robot parts."  

They can't just create an exact duplicate of Penny because that would carry the virus with it.

They can't create an exact duplicate without the virus because that Penny would cease to exist as soon as they used Ambrosius to make an evacuation plan instead.

So they essentially want Ambrosius to create a new Penny by removing all the robot parts from the Penny that currently exists, carrying the virus with them, and leaving only the human parts of Penny behind: her aura/soul. Then, the purely robot version is destroyed when Ambrosius creates something new.

Except... this new Penny, this human Penny, still needed a human body. That's what Ambrosius created and that's the snag I don't understand. They want a version of Penny that's just her aura, just her soul, but that soul still needs something to be housed in. Ambrosius himself notes that. At first I thought the group would just have some wisp-like version of Penny they'd have to find a new body for — perhaps leading to a new one for Ozpin too — but she's just... given a human body when he takes the technology away, something she absolutely didn't have before. That is Ambrosius' creation. That is what should have disappeared along with the removed parts of Penny, leaving only her soul — what Ambrosius didn't touch — behind. Instead, the plot oh so conveniently has Penny get a new body for free and it's untouched as they move onto the next task.

Ruby drops a casual line about Ambrosius not being able to kill, or destroy, or something, which I think is meant to be the justification here. The rule (which, again, we JUST learned) about not killing anyone supersedes the rule of two creations not allowed to exist, allowing Penny to stick around. But even if that’s true, it’s a load of bull. What, does the magic think no one in an entire city might die if the floating mechanism is removed and it plummets to the ground? Ambrosius didn’t say, “Sorry, can’t stop floating Atlas because thousands of people are still here and they’ll die if I create something new,” but we’re supposed to believe the group skated by on, “Sorry, can’t destroy the last creation like everything else because there’s a single person still using that body and she’ll die if I create something new”? 

Seriously, did I miss something? Or is this another, "Amity is ready because the group needs it" situation? The rule of creations ceasing to exist is bent because the group needs to have their friend around. Ambrosius is certainly enthusiastically complimentary, saying how "smart" the group is and that they've "done their homework," but I'm not so sure. It feels like a moment where the show is (once again) insistent that the group is far more talented and brilliant than their actions actually imply. It's only the rules of the world twisting and turning that allows for their success. To say nothing of how the episode dropped all these rules on the viewer in a ten minute info dump, ensuring we didn’t have any time to think about them before the deed was done. 

It doesn't add up for me and honestly, even putting that aside? I hate this. I absolutely despise it. Look, if it turns out this really does make sense then props to the group for coming up with that plan. Our snag aside, the rest is a legitimately well thought out wish. I don't have a problem with the execution so much as the message. I've been saying since Volume 7 that RWBY has done Penny a disservice in terms of her "real girl" narrative. Whereas before we had a firm message that you don't need "squishy guts" to be human, to be real, Volume 8 continued to carry us further and further into the idea that it is necessary. That Penny's body is entirely inhuman, something to hate, but at least her soul is human and good. That's what the virus arc taught us: your terrible, technological body might be betraying you, but hold onto the parts of you that are really human. I hated that too, but I never thought RWBY would go this far. They made Penny fully human and went, “THIS is the version that always should have existed.”

And this isn't just me reading into the implications. It's right there in the text. Blake says that they're looking for “Penny, the girl who’s always been there underneath." Meaning, underneath the metal. The girl exists trapped in the robot body. Yang holds up her arm and says that the metal is only "extra," it's not really who you are. 

That gets into two perspectives on disability that RWBY just doesn't have the nuance for: what's an integral and celebratory part of one person's existence can be seen as something separate and discomforting to another. Though there are many people with disabilities who would happily cure themselves with a magic Staff if given the chance, there are just as many who say no, this is a part of my identity. I don't want to change, I just want the world to accommodate my existence. However, RWBY takes a hard stance here, saying that any metal in your body is intrinsically bad. We didn’t use to have this take, but now the show has embraced it. Blake says the real Penny is trapped in there. Yang's words implies that she'd get rid of this "extra" bit of her if possible. Mercury with his metal legs is the enemy. Ironwood with half his metal body is the enemy. Whereas once difference was truly accepted, now it's shunned and fixed whenever possible. Those who can't be fixed, like Yang, must simply deal with the lot they've been dealt, reassuring themselves that the metal isn't really them. But Penny? Penny they can fix.

So they do and the very first thing Penny does is hug Ruby, exclaiming, “Do hugs always make you feel this warm inside? Wow. More!” and proceeds to hug all the others. 

What's the underlying message there? Penny didn't understand hugs before this moment. She never experienced the "warmth" of them while an android, despite the fact that here warmth is entirely metaphorical and has nothing to do with a literally cold body. RWBY really went and said that the "real girl” android was never actually real at all — not as real as she could be — because it's only when she's given "squishy guts" that she understands the true happiness of a hug.

Wow.

I mean seriously, wow. 

Never-mind that, you know, we've seen that happiness and warmth since she was first introduced.

RWBY is really rewriting all the core themes introduced in Volumes 1-3 and it sucks. The show is absolutely the worse for it.

To say nothing of all the other disservices to Penny's character here. There's all this buildup about whether she'll still be the same Penny once the wish is complete, but of course she is. We wouldn't want to have Penny struggle when she becomes something other than what she's always been, would we? After all, it took Yang an entire volume to work through the shock of a metal arm, but taking away a metal body for a human one is in no way traumatic. Having a normal, human body is intrinsically a good thing! Of course Penny accepts it with nothing but smiles. Becoming human is celebratory, but becoming more machine is a horror.

She gets to watch her body self-destruct, glitching out and collapsing in front of her. But again, nothing to unpack there that can't be covered with a hand over her mouth.

There's no discussion of whether Penny still has the Maiden powers, or whether a wish like that would mess with the transfer in any way. How did the group know this action wouldn't register as a clear-cut death, forcing the power out of her and into someone new? Obviously they couldn’t know, but no one even thought to bring it up? 

And the entire time they're formulating their evacuation plan, there's no talk of whether these portals will appear before everyone currently alive in the kingdom. I mean, if they do then Ironwood and Jacques can just waltz through and escape into Vacuo. If they don’t, then Maria and Pietro don't necessarily have a way out. We still don't know if they're stuck floating in Amity, or if Amity crashed, or if they made their way back to Mantle or Atlas. More importantly, the characters don't know. I have no problem with RWBY keeping that a surprise until the finale, but I absolutely take issue with Pietro's daughter walking through a portal, seemingly not to care whether her father is going to make it out too.

It's been the same with Qrow and his nieces' relationships. The show is good at insisting that these families love each other because they hug and smile while on screen together, but when shit is actually going down, none of them care about pesky things like disappearances, arrests, or “The last time I saw you, you were with an old woman on a damaged station after a villain attack, potentially stranded in deadly cold if life support failed.” 

So yeah, this entire arc with Penny has been a disaster. From throwing away her framing subplot, to giving her a virus that did absolutely nothing, to giving her the Maiden powers which she's also done nothing with, to erasing her android status for a “She's really human now” message, Penny has been done dirty by the show these last two volumes. Not nearly to the extent Ironwood has, but still. At this point I wish they'd just kept her dead dead. Why do I want her back when that resurrection produces no reaction, her conflicts lead nowhere, and one of the core things that made Penny Penny has now been magically erased?

I've been saying for weeks that killing Penny off and keeping Penny around each had serious downsides attached, yet I never expected RWBY to do BOTH.

Also, I'm warding off any, "But Pinocchio was made into a real boy too" defenses. RWBY is not Pinocchio. Penny is not Pinocchio. I thought the allusion was going to be the Pinocchio inspired girl heading into the whale, not the show forcing the exact plotline  —  down to a blue, magical creature — onto a character whose entire journey has been about accepting herself as an android. Congratulations, RT. You just obliterated years of work.

Again, if you'd like an example of how to do this far better:

As Penny's character falls apart, Atlas shakes, alerting Jaune and the other that a new wish has been granted. Jaune pecks at the screen and realizes "That did, uh, something…?” but doesn’t realize that there's a giant, red "LIVE" up in the corner.

Jaune tries to warn the entire kingdom about their plan, but what he actually says is

“Atlas is falling, but — !”

And then the communications cut out. 

Watts, perhaps?

Our heroes are really good at saying things that make large populaces panic, huh? This is the one (1) snag in their "impossible" plan, but as said above, it doesn't amount to anything. We get a shot of Nora, horrified at the thought of kingdom-wide communications being down, but literally seconds later Team RWBY has made portals appear that everyone can walk through. So... why do we care about communications? More importantly, why does the show try to make us care? So much time is spent getting the viewer invested in problems that never come to mean anything. 

Including the problem of Salem herself.

Because the group successfully creates that evacuation plan. This is it. Everyone is leaving while Salem still reforms. 

Yang asks if they can use the vaults themselves as a single point for everyone to go to and Ambrosius agrees. So everyone is going to pile into the Vacuo vault that can only be opened by an unknown Maiden? They're going to put an entire kingdom's worth of people, including their enemies, into the vault where the Relic of Destruction is? Yeah, that's great. Prior to this — like if this had been the plan at the end of Volume 7 — I would have 100% agreed that these risks are better than death by Salem/grimm/cold. Now though, Oscar as axed Salem for an unknown length of time, the cold is having no impact on the civilians outside, and the grimm only attack background military personnel that supposedly no one cares about. They couldn't have spent another few minutes (especially with time stopped!) to figure out a means of getting to Vacuo that doesn't involve revealing and providing access to the location of a super secret vault? To say nothing of what they're going to do if Salem wakes up and snags one of those portals for herself. Two kingdoms for the price of one!

But that's what they're going with. Weiss gives Ambrosius a schematic of the kingdom, I guess, and he makes branching pathways appear with numerous portals for everyone to step through. They'll enter through one and, when they exit another, will be in Vacuo. Easy peasy, right? Especially since Ambrosius doesn't seem to have any limitations about how often his power is used. Is it three creations every 100 years like Jinn? We're not told, at least not to my recollection. However, I was expecting there to be a waiting period, that they'd fix Penny, go to evacuate the kingdom, and learn that sorry, I can't make another creation just yet. It feels like the sort of shit move these beings would pull — "Don't cry to me when it's not what you wanted" —  it would have been another commentary on the group's insistence on putting friends over the people's safety (like demanding the Ace Ops not bomb the whale because of Oscar), and crucially, would have kept the action in Atlas. Isn't that what this volume is? The battle for and potential destruction of the Kingdom of Atlas? We have two episodes left and, unless something unexpected happens, we're moving that action to Vacuo. Why? 

Meanwhile, Penny's corpse is just chilling in the background 😬

While all this is going on, Winter reassures Jacques that he and Ironwood will be evacuated too, though she makes it clear saving him was Weiss' idea. It checks out, considering Weiss is the one who turned her father's arrest into a joke last volume. Winter still takes his abuse seriously.

The group prepares to leave with a celebratory, "We did it!" from Weiss. I'm still banging my head against that dining room table. Before they can pass through the portal though, Ambrosius leaves them with one, dire warning: "Do not fall." 

In any other story a line like that is a neon sign announcing to the audience that someone will absolutely fall, and maybe they will, but RWBY has dodged consequences so often I wouldn't be surprised if this was merely another way to string us along. Remember all the hype surrounding Salem? The cold combined with her army and magic? How she was going to decimate Atlas and leave our group broken in a Fall 2.0?

I mean, we still have two episodes left. Forty minutes of content. Salem might still decimate them, especially since something has to happen in the finale. But god, it's a problem that we've come this far without a payoff. Salem randomly decided not to attack anyone, was stopped by a weapon added in solely for this purpose, and now the whole kingdom is being evacuated with a plan the group could have used at the start. This volume really is meaningless. 

“We go to vacuo and hope we’ve thought of everything” they say as the camera zooms in on Cinder's smiling face. For the second week in a row.

Bingo time!

Winter betrayed Ironwood, the group used the Staff of Creation, and I'm axing Maria on behalf of Pietro. You can't have the guy's daughter become human — after he was killing himself to give her his aura?? — and magically walk to Vacuo, not knowing if he's even survived since she last saw him, and expect me to think he hasn't been forgotten. Same with Maria. Has the group mentioned her since Amity cut out, notably for reasons they couldn’t explain? Of course not. Did they care to find out what happened? Of course not. I have no doubt they'll both re-appear in the next two episodes, Pietro crying over how perfect his girl is now and Maria congratulating the group on their actions, but we're still marking it.

This is the ugliest thing I’ve ever created, I hope you all are enjoying it :D

Another week, another couple feet added to the hole we’re digging. I know I keep saying I have no idea what's going to happen next... but I have no idea what's going to happen next. A Vacuo ending was not in the cards, not outside of them miraculously showing up in ships. Maybe they have been on their way to Atlas (somehow...) and will arrive precisely when everyone has left! Anything is possible at this point.

See you next Saturday, everyone. Hold on until then lol. 💜

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 04 (first part)

(Masterpost) (Episode 03) (Episode 04 second part)

Warning: Spoilers for all 50 episodes!

Also warning: these posts just keep getting longer how are they getting even longer good lord I had to split this one. 

School’s in for the Summer!

All of these nice young actors show off the results of their movement training as they beautifully perform prostrate bowing in near-unison. (yes, there is a Chinese word for this action, but it’s used in English in a shitty orientalist way, so OP is going to call this prostrate bowing)

Note that the very last person to hit his knees, by a wide margin, is Head Snob Jin Zixuan.

Lan Qiren looks them over with pleased dickishness.

I am really wondering what actor Huang Ziteng looks like without a struggle beard and mouth blood and chronic fainting.

That's...a lot of crosses, my dude

(more after the cut!)

Lan Clan Rules

The Lan rule set is basically a checklist for shit Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang can get up to this summer.

The rules include several that Lan Wangji is actively breaking this very moment, including “Don’t wear any jangling objects like beads,” “don’t be suspicious,” “don’t pierce your ears” and “don’t be supercilious.”  

Wei Wuxian’s Summer Project

Extrovert Wei Wuxian gets started on the important work of making new friends. Waving to Lan Wangji in class doesn't get him anywhere (apparently), but he meets Nie Huaisang and forms one of the most important relationships of his two lives.

He doesn’t even know what they are being mutually squirrely about yet but they are instantly on the same wavelength.

I like you, yeah I like you, and I’m feeling so bohemian like you

When Wei Wuxian discovers that this classmate has smuggled an entire live birb into this boring-ass lecture he is completely delighted, and they are brothers in troublemaking from this point onward.

This is where we learn something important about Nie Huaisang. He wanted a rare canary, so he stalked it for three days, caught it, and caged it.  

This careful hunter is 15 or 16...I wonder how much more patient and determined he will be when he's 35 or 36?

The Salute Ceremony: The Unstabby Bit

The Jin Clan starts off the salute ceremony by presenting Lan Qiren with a fancy book bound with gold string.

Wei Wuxian is genuinely impressed, but Jiang Cheng calls it "meretricious" [op looks it up] which means "apparently attractive but having in reality no value or integrity." Wow, Jiang Cheng is so deliciously bitchy.

Then it’s Nie Huasang’s turn. Wei Wuxian is impressed when he hears his name, meaning he befriended him without giving a fuck about who he is, which is sweet.  I adore this friendship and think there are so many reasons NHS chose WWX to carry out his vengeance, none of which come from him being the dread Yiling Laozu.

The Salute Ceremony: The Thirsty Bit

To represent the Nie clan, I present this nice pot to Lan Qiran, and this rare and beautiful twink to Lan Xichen

Note: the trash talking jerks in the background are from the Jiang clan. Yanli does not remind them about their manners.

Quiet, reserved Lan Xichen greets Meng Yao with compliments and a hand massage and by doing this thing with his mouth.

No words are being produced at this point, he is just...parting his lips gently while he rakes his eyes over Meng Yao’s face.

Meng Yao doesn’t mind a bit

Flames on the Side of my Face

The Wen Clan guys have left Club Ruohan and are coming to summer school. Wen Chao is evil. It's subtle but you can tell by the way he casually sets people on fire.

Lan Clan Rules for Gate Keepers

do not draw your sword to stop someone from setting you on actual fire

do not use magic to stop someone from setting you on actual file

do not call for help when someone sets you on actual fire

Wens Qing and Ning believe in helping people, so once the smell of burning flesh starts to annoy them, Wen Qing puts out a solid 80% of the flames.

Note: We’re going to be spending a lot of time hating Wen Chao, so now might be a good time to have a look at (actor) He Ping out of costume.

Clearly, Wen Chao is just a beautiful troubled person with pretty moles who totally deserves a second chance.

The Salute Ceremony: The Stabby Bit

The Wens interrupt Jiang Cheng’s salute. Lan Xichen apologizes to them for not knowing they were going to show up like a bunch of interrupting assholes.

Lan Wangji wants to murder Weng Chao and looks at Xichen for permission but Xichen says no.

I never get to murder anybody not even that Su She asshole

So Wei Wuxian starts running the WWX fight book, which has to actually be pretty gratifying for the Lans, who are stuck being good hosts.  

He skips the windup in this situation of heightened danger, so he is formal, polite, and doesn't cross any boundaries. But Wen Chao came looking to fight so it escalates immediately, with Jiang Cheng also getting in Wen Chao’s face.

The Wen Clan decides to teach the Jiang Clan a lesson.  This is really the seed of the Lotus Pier massacre...it was always going to happen. The Wens draw swords and almost the entire Jiang Clan immediately draws as well.  

Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng both use the same sexy move, kicking their swords up off their benches into their hands.

Nie Huaisang hides behind Meng Yao, who immediately uses his whole body to shield him and shows a bit of his titanium spine. I LOVE Meng Yao’s strength here. 

Wen Qing protects her brother by putting her arm across his chest, which is not going to be helpful in any way if someone wants to stab him.  

To end this urgent and dangerous standoff Lan Xichen slooooowly brandishes his flute and plays a little toodleoo for 15 full seconds, eventually causing all the swords to fly up to the ceiling and then down into the floor.

{I know, flautists, I know. Never let facts get in the way of a joke!]

Everyone politely allows him to do this without actually taking any swipes at each other.  Then the swords all magically vanish along with the holes they made in the floor, which is convenient.

Now we get to see Lan Xichen angry, and oh my god, the tiny glimpse of that secret fire. 

Now Wen Qing finally steps up to defuse the situation. She cannot believe she has to work with her boss's horrible stupid son who insists on fucking up every project, god why did he ever get made a vice president I can't believe I have to work with this tool.

Meanwhile, Lan Xichen is going to rue the day he introduced Wei Wuxian to Flute Magic.

Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang 4-EV-R

After the ceremony Nie Huaisang, calling Wei Wuxian “Wei-Xiong” (brother Wei, a bit more formal than -ge) praises his bravery. Wei Wuxian says that he enjoys resisting evil, harking forward to his chivalric calling & future promise with Lan Wangji.

Jiang Cheng says, without irony, I think, and with only a little bitterness, that normal people can't compare to Wei Wuxian’s bravery. Wei Wuxian downplays his courage and says that he wants to teach Nie Huaisang to have fun.

Now - hopefully we've all seen Fatal Journey, right? I won't spoil it here. But if you've seen it you know that a person who gives Nie Huaisang permission to be his true self is going to be precious to him.

Lan Wangji shows up and Wei Wuxian calls out to him, calling him "Ji-Xiong." Lan Wangji totally blows him off but Wei Wuxian is undeterred.

Xichen and Qiren Talking.

Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren talk about this whole Wen situation while Qiren pours some tea that appears to just be hot water. Dude.

Qiren is afraid this murdering of cultivators is going to be something the two of them can't handle. You think? There are already about 16 dead cultivators in the mosh pit at Club Ruohan; at what point are you planning to handle it?

This Ship is Sailing

Meng Yao comes to say goodbye to Lan Xichen and to trade hearts with him. Also to have a lot of feelings that his giant eyes and adorable dimples cannot contain.

Lan Xichen: Don't bow to me. No need to thank me like this. We’re equals. As equals we could take turns kneeling to each other, if you catch my drift.

Lan Xichen: Why not stay for several days? Oh if you're Nie Mingjue's boy I guess I have to let you go. He's great. Really. SO great.  

Lan Xichen: Look, you’re with Nie Mingjue and I’m with Nie Mingjue and it only takes one stroke to turn a Vee into a triangle, is what I’m saying.

Grown-ass man Lan Xichen is so much less prudent than his teenage brother. Each of them has fallen hard for someone but the much younger Wangji tries to control it. Hopeless romantic Xichen goes right over the cliff, as well as deliberately knocking away many of the fences around Wangji’s heart so Wei Wuxian can make a home there. We love him for it, of course.

Episode 04, Part 2 is right here.

[spacetwiga]

leave c!phil out of bullshit 2k21 -- a not so tiny post by a new enthusiast

As someone who finds both common fanon and actual canon to be quite fun, I really think the general DSMP fandom would benefit greatly from a few things in general: the greatest, in my opinion, is learning to accept that popular fanon won’t usually be the canon you receive. Another, of course, is that POVs are golden, but with these two things being flimsy in being accepted, they are the major flaws that cause about 90% of the absolute messy takes that gain traction, oftentimes poisoning a canon character's ability to exist in the story.

My biggest beef regarding this comes from how y’all treat c!Phil, so here I am, being annoying on main side! 

TL;DR... Just because someone acted like like a guidance to others, doesn’t always mean that they'll want to be the father figure role for everyone that breathes. Similarly, pinning down a character on a single trope is wack, so don't be surprised if they grow away from it.

Baby’s first little dsmp rambling below!

(Warning: it's long as hell)

The Dream SMP plotline is not written out like most popular media. With so many moving parts in the form of daily streams and the wonderful tool of live improvisation, it makes perfect sense that such a giant cast would not always be on the same page. Adding onto that, it also makes more sense that a vast majority of the cast will be placed into supporting roles, as the story needs to have characters that serve as narrative anchors and others that function as the links in a chain, all weathering the storm that is the plot.

Screentime, of course, plays a major factor into canon exposure -- in terms of the Dream SMP, POV matters equally, if not more, too. 

It’s a pretty neat way of showing things, but in the end, the fanbase has a lovely (read: godawful /lh) way of analysing characters, particularly when it relates to how they interact with others from their fave character’s POV. The tendency to analyse things from a single character's POV is fine, but not when attempting to critique the greater whole of a conflict. Both sides, no matter how wrong they may seem to be, matter.

Adding onto the fact that everything is live, there are things that will spiral out of control, casual words being skewed and thus having the potential of a single line seemingly contradicting the entire ‘story’ that the fanbase has made. If it directly affects a fave's POV in particular, one is more likely to take offense, as bias immediately bars one from trying to see the other person's side of things.

POV is important. 

Which brings me to c!Phil, and how critics tend to ignore his perspective to prop up another character, or justify the tearing down of another.

Improvisation is both a blessing and a curse; the fanbase, however, loves to test out the latter. With it, the fanbase starts crafting tales to justify it...And so begins the mess that is c!Phil discourse.

Say it with me, folks: c!Phil is not supposed to be your fave’s fluffy father figure... unless you’re c!Wilbur!!!

😃☝🏾Dadza is good...👉🏾😎👉🏾 But fandom wants the excessive, idealized version.

-- birb 2k21

Family dynamics are generally loved for their potential for comfort, particularly those of a found family nature. Fandom in general tends to lean into them wholeheartedly, with most major bases having at least one prominent group present; SBI, of course, is no different. From fanart to popular fanfiction, it's arguably the biggest group dynamic alongside the Dream Team, and for that, a precedence was set. 

c!Phil, if he ever joined, would fix everything! All of the ‘kids’ would turn to their new mentor and everything would turn out fine! This all knowing, morally just character will chuckle at their antics and wacky hijinks will follow! Fun times, right? /s

The hope for it, however, has long since been shattered, and frankly, good for him!

To go a little ooc, cc!Phil has stated multiple times that, while he was friendly with a lot of the cast as c!Phil, his only paternal link (at least biologically) lies with c!Wilbur. Simple, right? It should be -- there are multiple clips of him saying this -- but fans choose to ignore it in their critiques, generally citing favouritism or downright neglect for the character’s flaws. From 'favoring' Techno (who, in canon, holds the highest link in friendship outside of c!Wilbur's familal link) to 'neglecting' to visit Tommy (who he barely knew, and also assumed, like many others, that he was fine), these critiques weigh heavily on the scale that judges Phil’s so called father figure trope. 

The story, however, has only leaned into (and persisted with) that for c!Wilbur alone, and adding onto it, there is an established acknowledgement from both ccs. That confirmation should hold the most weight, especially since both Phil and Wilbur seem alright with it. Even so, that familial has yet to be explored much for both characters, particularly regarding c!Phil, who has his debut (at least narratively) in a scene that feels opposite to the classic fatherly role.

c!Wilbur denounced accepting that helping hand to fall entirely into his explosive end, setting a precedence unlike most fatherly types arriving to save their kid. Usually, fandom narrative would love a close save, father and son uniting to heal and build up what was broken, but c!Phil’s entrance inks his story in failure. Angsty, right? We love angst!

And yet, as the story ticks on, the bad takes pile up.

Why? Well, I’l used to think that it is a “funny haha” type thing; a way to grieve for a character that was lost, as Alivebur was genuinely a great character. However, with the plot slowly progressing c!Phil’s story to evolve away from the ‘mentor the kids’ trope , I should have seen a storm on the horizon.

It should have been seen from the moment he stabbed c!Wilbur in the chest, but optimism is one hell of a smokescreen.

Built up fanon, however, is probably the greatest fog to ever exist.

There are lines before the button room confrontation that paint a picture of Wilbur seeking out the approval of his father (who seemed distant, at least from his POV), as well as hints to the SBI dynamic, but with the countless dismissals/retcons from CCs involved, as well as little to no consistent canon acknowledgement of this team dad role...Why base an entire hate piece of c!Phil just because popular fanon isn’t real? 

Why, for the sake of building up a well rounded character, would one place the title of a communal parental figure on a grieving father who has little attachment to the community involved, especially when most of them are too busy delving into their own issues?

Furthermore, why go for Mr. Philza Minecraft: Angel of Death, CEO of KEKW, Functioning Immortal????

It’s madness, luv, and frankly, antis cannot let c!Phil process any of his grief (or flesh out his character) without his contributions being fatherly. His role has been idealized to the point where he is not a character on his own, but an accessory to the happiness of other characters. That is not how the world works, and in a conflict riddled server like the dsmp, arguing that it should be like that is counterproductive.

c!Phil had his own shit to deal with, and as he slowly uncovers how fucked up the server actually was, he merely adapts to it. He learns to play the game by his own rules, and people become mad that he’s succeeding in his own way. It's as simple as that, particularly when referencing his initial exposure to the world he now inhabits.

c!Phil is a man who used to hear of his son’s success from the letters he received, words spinning tales of won revolutions and newfound friendships. To a father, those letters are more than enough to assume that all is well, and with it, he had no reason to check on his son, who was already old enough to be carving his path alone. For him to arrive and see just how broken his son actually was, and then, in front of faces he only vaguely knows, kill said son... There's a lot to take in.

He shouldn't have had to care about L'Manberg in those moments, not when he had his son in his arms, dead by his own goddamn weapon; his son who, to his knowledge, was doing pretty well up until he caught wind of his plot. Yet, he does.

He gives them the benefIt of the doubt, even ignoring the one person he has shown to have deep history with (c!Techno) to assist the nation in defeating the withers and rebuilding what was lost.

c!Phil stays in a nation that has seemingly brought his son right into his demise, holding in that grief to help people who he assumes have the chance to rebuild, to reform. For a moment, he trusts that the system can turn into something positive, offering to hunker down and do what he can to help. That’s the start of a fatherly type role for most -- with many expectations rising from fans to ‘fix’ all these traumatized characters.

In another plot, perhaps critics could have gotten the tropes they want from c!Phil, but to blame the character for reacting negatively to a world he barely knew, right after seeing it ruin his son and target a friend...Maybe the need for a "father figure" only stems from making their faves happy.

Characters that don't directly support your fave are not inherently awful characters. Critique based on that alone is...flimsy, really, but honestly, you can use to to show how they process things.

Which brings me to the events leading up to Doomsday, and with it, the steady rise of c!Phil’s defining traits.

Say it with me, folks: c!Phil is one of the most loyal members on the server, but loyalty doesn’t mean he's blindly following along!

😃☝🏾Butcher Army take this L👉🏾😎👉🏾 Found it in the L’Mancrater

-- birb 2k21

The butcher army arc, while nestled among the mainline story of Tommy’s exile (which I will not even mention, because those dadza takes about visiting may deserve a post on their own), allows for c!Phil to see into the minds of those who had once been with (or even against) his son’s plans. Sure, he may be witnessing them after the eve of their newfound traumas, but this is an important observation to make when comparing how easy it was to denounce his affiliation to them and side with c!Technoblade.

Unlike the new Administration, slowly dipping deeper and deeper into their own form of power hunger, c!Technoblade’s base desires had never wavered. His trust in others, however, had, still nursing the sting of a betrayal, but with no conflict in sight. He is reforming, finding comfort in his solitude, and still maintaining contact with those he trusts.

Techno's Compass, for one, is a major example of their mutual trust. Despite being on opposing territories, they are civil enough to trust each other, just like old friends.

Thus, when you take two old friends who are more than used to conflict -- one grieving and one betrayed, but both seeking neutrality -- it shouldn’t have surprised the antis that c!Phil would place c!Techno’s whereabouts (and life, mind you) over some government he barely knew. 

And yet, above all else, c!Phil starts off as a neutral party for everyone's sake, forgoing potential conquest for peace.

To c!Phil and c!Techno, it’s like fighting back to back, knowing that one can always trust the other to fend off those just waiting to take advantage of your blindspot, while also quelling the need to imagine your partner turning around and doing the same. That sort of friendship is forged through many, many hardships.

They betray what little trust he had built in them. That’s on them.

c!Phil is aware how untrusting c!Techno is, and while c!Techno feels safe enough to give his all for c!Phil, he never exploits it to get ahead, which is something L'Manbergians felt okay with doing.

They take a book out of the playbook used on c!Techno, for c!Techno.

They went after yet another person who was close to him, using their power and influence to hold an execution under the guise of seeking justice. If c!Wilbur, at least pre-corruption arc, sent letters to his father, one would at least expect some of his old ideals of freedom and fairness to leak through into his friends, right? To see those c!Phil assumed would hold similar ideals immediately skew towards a darker, brutal side, particularly in threatening others to get what they wanted...Well, shit hit the fan.

c!Phil does not have that strong relationship with any former L’Manbergians, and despite there being potential for such, it didn't work out that way; instead, however, those characters manage to mistake his kindness for weakness. They take his preferred neutrality as a way to exploit him, to gain in such a way that he lost agency...

No more Mister Nice Dadza, and honestly, he’s justified in that notion.

They’ve lost his trust, time too short to have gained that strong link like c!Techno’s or c!Wilbur’s, and with it, came the inevitable association with Doomsday.

c!Phil knew c!Techno’s intentions from the beginning -- which had only wavered into dormancy because he had grown tired of fighting, understanding that the cycle he wishes to break is not worth his efforts -- so the agreement in participating is effortless. 

c!Dream was there too, of course, but in their mutual quest for eradication, it’s made canon that c!Techno and c!Phil hid away most of their arsenal, despite seeming overprepared. They have no loyalty to c!Dream; they’re smart enough to play along, however. He was a means to an end.

There’s no lies present in their relationship; c!Phil needed someone who didn’t try and pull wool over his eyes, and c!Techno let him see.

c!Techno needed someone who wouldn't stab him in the back, and c!Phil stayed true as his hidden sword.

Which is why, as the two joined forces, ideals aligning and power synergized, they didn’t think twice about nuking the nation to bedrock. Mutually agreeing that the system needs to die, they did what they could, and they succeeded.

How cool of them, tbh LMAO.

New L’Manberg tugged too hard at the sleeping tiger’s tail; they shouldn’t have expected it to roll over.

Their openness to each other was known.

There was no need for underhanded plays, for hidden betrayals, for undisclosed words.

Their loyalties were strong.

They were in sync.

In conclusion (maybe, maybe not...this shit is long holy heck)

😃☝🏾 I may hate this analysis in 30 minutes👉🏾😎👉🏾 Or I may make a part 2. Fuck it!

-- birb 2k21

And that’s what makes c!Phil an interesting character: He tends to be critiqued in reference to chatacters who have very well wronged him, have no affiliation to him or get associated to him through popular fanon. There's a lot to cover that I haven't (from Ghostbur to the whole Tommy 'dilemna') but overall I'm digging what I have now and if I ever get more energy, I'll continue!

c!Phil enthusiasts, I hope I did you proud LMAO. It's my first forray into this side of tumblr 👉🏾👈🏾 I'm a lurker.

c!Phil antis, you can either act respectful or go argue with a wall. I got experience dealing with antis on Tumblr; I am immune to BS.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed. Signing off!

- BIRB.

[serena-inverse]

Serena Plays: Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity

Just beat Chapter 3: Freeing Korok Forest- and I have *thoughts*

Cut for spoilers- and again this is 95% me talking about my boi Revali. Also this absolutely got away from me and  turned into an essay about ‘Why Revali hates Link in Botw VS Why Revali hates Link in HW:AoC’

So a few random thoughts about this Chapter, and a few other general things I noticed while playing that I love:

Finally got to play as Vah Medoh and YAS!!!! I LOVED IT!

Hestu is adorable.

Revali is sassy and it’s great, “Maybe you could sneak by if you weren’t holding a giant pair of maracas”

Urbosa is such a Mom the way she immediately shushes Revali and goes to tell Hestu they’ll help him.

Fighting the evil clones of the Champions was weird and reminded me in the worse possible way of all the ‘corrupted Champions’ fanart I’ve seen.

Link pulling out the sword was *awesome*

I lol’d at the way the Great Deku tree had like 3 lines and then went straight back to sleep. ‘Saving the world is great and all but I need my beauty sleep’

The way Revali yelps ‘My feathers!” if he gets caught on fire is so cute.

The way Revali says ‘Fine Fine’ when you switch to his character during combat is A+, the delivery/tone is just great.

I notice that Revali has been drinking his respect women juice, because he was throwing a lot of compliments to Urbosa when I played with them both for a mission, for example, ‘You’re always so observant, that saved me today, thank you’. and also a line about her being a worthy comrade?

Now, all that being said- I have some *ISSUES* with Link and Revali’s relationship in this game so far.

So, we all know that in BotW Revali didn’t like Link, and spent a lot of time being rude and talking down to him. However there was (in my opinion) a clear and understandable reason for this. Revali worked tirelessly to become the amazing archer he is and earn his place as a Champion. We see him during a cutscene in the DLC launching himself into the sky over and over to try and master his Gale, heedless of the injuries he occurs in the process, and this gives us an idea of the lengths he’s gone to in order to become the incredible warrior he now is.

In comparison, in his own words, Link became a Champion ‘just because he happened to have that little darkness sealing sword on his back.’. You can understand his anger- it’s not fair that some random guy got to be a Champion just because a sword picked him, when he had to work so very hard to gain the same honor. Now we, the audience, know that Link has also worked very hard and is a Master swordsman in his own right, but Revali doesn’t. Unfortunately Link refusing to respond to Revali’s harsh words and criticisms only serves to anger the Rito further- and again you can understand the thought process of ‘What, I’m not good enough for you to acknowledge?? Just because you have the fancy sword?’ (Again, we as the audience know Link is functionally mute and hides his feelings as a way to cope with the pressure of being the chosen knight- but Revali doesn’t.)

Please note that I am not saying Revali was in the right to act the way he did, I will freely admit he was being an arrogant ass, but I can at least *understand* where his anger was coming from.

Now...cut to HW:AoC. I loved the way Revali and Link met in this game. I actually thought that perhaps they might have a better relationship here, because now Revali has had a chance to meet and battle Link *before* he became ‘The Chosen Knight’, before anger and resentment could cloud his perception.

But then Revali made that comment about Link being a ‘pathetic knight’ after Zelda broke up their fight. Which confused me a little, because by all accounts Revali saw Link mow through scores of Rito Warriors, and then the two of them had a fairly close fight, so why would he think of him as ‘pathetic’ after that? It didn’t seem to make much sense, but I put it down to (pardon the pun) ‘ruffled feathers’.

Then we come to the opening cinematic of Freeing Korok Forest and....wow. Just wow. Revali *lays into* Link. ‘Why is he the leader?’ ‘Why is he even here?’ And then the bit that in my opinion really crossed the line and was totally uncalled for ‘My one comfort is that your reputation will be completely ruined when you fail- the fallen knight’

*WHY* is he acting this way? As far as I can see Link has done nothing to earn this level of spite. Revali is arrogant and cocky sure, but you can’t just have him hate someone with that level of intensity without giving him a reason for it. It would make sense if he treated everyone that way- if he acted like everyone was dirt beneath his feet until they proved otherwise- but he doesn’t! Sure he might roll his eyes or tell them they’re ‘ridiculous’ but with the other Champions he works together with them fine- and even compliments them during fights!

I am holding on to the thought that perhaps later chapters might give us more insight, but at the moment I have this horrible sinking feeling someone decided Revali’s character was ‘the asshole’ and therefore decided to just use him to cause drama, regardless of whether it made sense or not. Revali is my favourite and I just...I really don’t want to see him used like that, when there’s so much more to him. Please don’t do that to my birb Nintendo.

Okay, it’s 3am, I’m going to stop now but I needed to get these thoughts down. Maybe I’ll come back tomorrow and edit this if anything else has sprung to mind.

[dnarez]

Chapter 26 - Her Friends

Hawks POV

I know I was ignoring my duties as a pro hero, but I didn't want her to wake up alone, I'm so happy that her wings will grow back, after the doctor told me that she will wake up in some days I felt relived.

I had to go and finish all the paper to be her legal guardian, since my plan worked really well it was easy to make them agree and let her with me...

Furthermore, I sighed and pet her hair, taking the strand of h/c that was on her face and put it back in their place. "Come on pretty birb, it's been 4 days already... I would appreciate if you woke up so that you can pick the decoration of your new bedroom, I think that you will kill me if I do it on my own" I chuckle and kiss her forehead "I need to call my sidekicks to make sure everything is okay, I will be back soon" I get up and go to the door but almost am hit by the door.

"Yoh! Slow down man! You almost hit me" I say backing up a little so that the person can come in. Looking at then I see some faces from the festival, but one that I remembered that she talked about the most was the one in front of me "Hey! I know you! You are my lil sis' friend! Shinso right?"

The boy looked stunned for a few seconds but nodded and bowed to me "Yes, nice to meet you, how is she?"

I smiled and put my hand on his shoulder "She is fine, just sleeping, don't worry too much, the docs told me that she will soon wake up, and I can recognize you all from her pics of you, the festival or by the stories she told me"

The other boys bowed, wait... she only has male friends! "Hey! You all better keep your teen hands to yourself, or I will-" my cellphone started ringing, so I clicked my tongue annoyed and huffed "I got to go, but I will be watching you all!" I pass by them and out of the hospital to answer the cellphone.

Normal POV

Shinso huffs and goes to the bed, looking at her back made him worried, she was all bandaged up and that made his heart clench in worry, after he tried to make her go away from his life his heart has been in pain. 'I'm such an idiot! I shouldn't have tried to keep her away from me, I should just accept her friendship and stop being an asshole!'

He sat down and keep looking at her listening carefully as the steps of the other 2 from class 1A got to her other side.

Kirishima looked at her, worried about her wings and everything else, he puts a card and some flower on the bedside table. "Get well soon, we will be waiting for you at classroom" Eijiro petted her head and got out of the room, seeing his friend like that was earth shattering.

Tokoyami put a card, flowers and an apple pie also on the bedside table "We will be waiting for you, Dark Shadow miss hanging out with you" he put his hand on her lower back and caresses there. Dark Shadow was being terrible in the hero training this week, not knowing where Y/n was made him unstable.

Dark Shadow came out and petted her hair, then he put a drawing with the other things on the bedside table. Tokoyami nodded to Shinso and also get out of the room, leaving Hitoshi alone with her.

Hitoshi open his bag and takes out a book of Folklore Creatures from Brazil, he starts reading for her, Shinso didn't want her to be alone, but also didn't have anything to talk about, so he bought a random book to read to her.

"Boiuna or Big-Snake... well... isn't it an interesting name for a tale" he clears his throat and gets comfy on the armchair "The Boiuna is a giant snake from the North Region of Brazil; she lives among the rocks of rivers and lagoons, from where it leaves to hunt and sink boats. When it comes out of the stones, it thunders, sends lightning and makes it rain. Still, according to folklore, the moon is the head of the serpent, the stars are the eyes, and the rainbow is the blood of the Boiuna." (here, if you would like to read more about Brazilian folklore I myself am brazilian https://www.boredpanda.com/discover-characters-from-brazilian-folklore-and-the-explanation-behind-them/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic )

He stares at the page for some time "This is... extremely cool!... and weird" Hitoshi huffs, he was about to read another legend, but Hawks came back to the room with a nurse.

"Hey! I know you would like to stay with her, but she needs to take a sponge bath, the docs said they would try to wake her up tomorrow" Keigo said as he got closer to the bed

"Okay, please tell her to send a message as soon as she can" Hitoshi put the book on the bedside table and as he was about to exit the room he turns to Hawks and says "I'm sure that she will love moving in with you" then he's gone.

Keigo stares at the door for a few seconds and look at the nurse "Do you need me to..." he points to the door.

The nurse shakes her head "I will just close the curtain, I know you musk be worried about her Hawks-sama, but from what I see she will be okay, there is a lot of people looking out for her" the nurse closes the curtain and does her job.

Keigo chuckles and sat on the armchair where Hitoshi was set "She sure does..." he looks at the weird book that the boy had left her, and the other gifts, giving a little smile he opens the book and reads it, as he waits for his little sister to wake up.

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Yoh, please check out my other stories, also, if you use other platforms you can also find me on Tumblr, Ao3 and Quotev, but remember that here is always the first place that I post on.

Tag List:

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[afterspark-podcast]

My Little Pony/Transformers: Friendship in Disguise, Part 2 Transcript

[This can also be found on AO3!]

[Stinger]

O: [laughing]

S: Like, I told you about this before.  You- you know my reasoning, you know where it comes from.

[Intro Music]

O: Welcome back to our April Fools’ Special!

S: For the My Little Pony/Transformers crossover.

O: Today we will go through issues 3 and 4, which will finish this little series and now on to part 1 of issue 3- Fluttershy makes friends, or [clears throat] um, ‘Pet Sounds’.

S: Fluttershy and Discord are in Fluttershy's house having a tea party, when they hear a very loud noise outside.

O: Discord, for reference, is a reformed villain in the series.  He's basically just Q from Star Trek if Q were an amalgam of a bunch of different critters all smooshed together.  (Including being played by the same actor.)  Ah, but he's good friends with Fluttershy at tha- this point in the series, presumably.

S: Outside in a crater, Soundwave emerges concluding that this world is ‘illogical’.

O: Fluttershy asks Discord if he's trying to play a trick on her, but he says even he can't think of something this bizarre.

S: Soundwave scares several of Fluttershy's animal friends, who flee into her house for safety.

O: Fluttershy attempts to calm them by saying, “No one's all bad!”  Before she catches sight of Ravage, Ratbat, Rumble, and Laserbeak.

S: Her first instinct is, “I can bond with this person!  He has PETS!!!”

O: Pretty much.  Fluttershy gathers up a few of her animal friends and flies directly over to Soundwave to introduce herself.

S: Said animal friends do not appear to be happy about this turn of events.

O: I don’t blame them!

S: Soundwave does not detect a threat from Fluttershy, but correctly detects a threat from Discord.

O: Meaning Soundwave can scan for chaos magic.

S: Well, considering Starscream, I'm pretty sure he can just scan for chaos in general.

O: [laughs] That's not a bad way of looking at it!  Soundwave begins attacking Discord, while the cassettes make a beeline for Fluttershy

S: Rumble, being the only one who can presumably speak in this group, starts badgering Fluttershy for information about this world's defenses.

O: And also, “Why does everything smell like lavender!?”

S: The Decepticons… I guess, know what lavender smells like.

O: I think the question is, do the Decepticons like what lavender smells like?

S: Very good question.  Discord proceeds to make a nu- a nuisance of himself to Soundwave, transforming into a metallic version of himself.  With puns even!

O: [snorts] Fluttershy, being Fluttershy, spots a scratch on Ravage's nose.

S: Or a booboo, as she calls it.

O: And pulls out some ‘booboo cream’ to tend the wound.

S: Ravage looks rather disarmed by all of this attention.

O: The rest of the animal cassettes all gather around Fluttershy, while Rumble is in the background getting more annoyed as he protests that it's not a ‘booboo’ it's ‘battle damage’.

S: Rumble backhands the cream out of Fluttershy's... hand?  Hoof?

O: Hoof, probably. [laughs]

S: To the shock and chagrin of the rest of the cassettes, Discord, and all of the animals in the vicinity.

O: Fluttershy gets upset because she was, “Trying to be nice!”

S: The other three cassettes turn on Rumble, as Discord transforms Fluttershy's animal friends into little robot versions of themselves.  Surprisingly menacing ones!  And they all attack Soundwave.  Soundwave gets to learn what being attacked by a dozen rabid little bunnies feels like.

O: Rumble attempts to dissuade his fellow cassettes from murder, invoking the ‘f word’.  The ‘f word’ being ‘friendship’ here.

S: Fluttershy immediately changes her tune and asks if friendship is what they really care about.

O: Soundwave responds with, “Unquestionably: Friendship superior.”

S: While being covered in a bunch of tiny, rabid, metal animals.

O: Yes.  The fighting stops, as Fluttershy says they can start over and be friends.

S: Discord points out that he could just turn them all into little pretty ponies, but doesn't.

O: The animal friends are returned to normal, and Rumble apologizes to Fluttershy.

S: Megatron coms Soundwave at this point, and tells him to meet up with the rest of the Decepticons.

O: Soundwave responds in the affirmative, but with the caveat of, “Eventually.”

S: And the final panel has Soundwave sitting down and looking on at- as his cassettes and Fluttershy frolic.

O: It is a stupidly cute panel.

S: Mm-hmm, Rumble has a bunch of bunnies in his arms.

O: Ravage is playing with a birb.

S: Laserbeak and Ratbat are both giving tiny animals rides.

O: And Discord is giving Soundwave a thumbs up.

S: It's happy communication all around.

O: Right!? Like, this is what Soundwave deserves, okay!? This is my humble opinion- Soundwave should just stay here and be happy.  I actually would pay good money for a crossover- like, a crossover fic of them.  Just Soundwave helping with like, Fluttershy's animal hospital thing.  That sounds so cute! [laughs]

S: It would be a relaxing vacation for him.

O: He deserves a relaxing vacation.  My boy deserves a relaxing vacation!  Also, just going to pause- if you guys hear creaking, I am super sorry.  But we- my neighbor is moving around a lot for some reason, and there's a lot of cranking going on here.  So, sorry you can hear that.

S: Issue 3 part 2, “The Flying Fox Trot,” begins with Rainbow Dash reclining on a cloud and chomping on an apple, content with life.

O: At least until Windblade zooms by, dissipating Rainbow's perch.

S: The two introduce themselves to each other and rainbow proclaims herself as, “The fastest in Equestria!”

O: To which, Windblade, seasoned warrior, plane with literal jet engines, asks, “Until I showed up?”  Of course, the only way to settle this is with a race, apparently.

S: Considering Rainbow Dash's personality, yeah.

O: Yeah.

S: At the starting line we get cameos from some horse-based Transformers, Mach Kick and Battle Unicorn.

O: Which, honestly, since one’s a horse and one's a unicorn, I'm just amused that these exist at all- in a toy line for boys.  And also, I kind of want them on principle.

S: They're-

O: They look amazing. [laughs]

S: With very convoluted transformations.

O: Apparently.  Because apparently, you can't, you- you- you- can take the horse out of the organic but you cannot take the horse out of a horse.

S: [laughs]

O: I know that wasn’t right.

S: You can take the organic out of the horse, but not the horse out of the robot.

O: Yes.  So it's, uh, anatomy is just about as bad as a real horse is what I'm getting at here. [laughs]  Windblade and Rainbow Dash take off and are neck and neck, figuratively speaking, since Windblade doesn't have a neck right now, but whatever.  Until they run into a gaggle of Decepticons.

S: Misfire and the Rainmakers not- well, to be specific.  And honestly that just sounds like a band name?

O: Jem and the Holograms’ new rival! [laughs] I like- great- okay, okay, I know- I know- I know that we were talking about this in our warm-up, not in the actual episode but if you want to get into weird things you can that like, fit into the Transformers-verse, arguably Jem and the Holograms takes place in the fit into the same continuity.  And in fact, there was a G.I. Joe character whose entire backstory is that he was a roadie for Jem and the Holograms, and G.I. Joe definitely takes place in the same universe as Transformers.

[Okay, so like, I’m not wrong per say, but arguably Transformers, Inhumanoids, G.I. Joe, and Jem and the Holograms all take place in the same universe due to the presence of Hector Ramirez in all four series. ~O]

S: And considering the comics, which definitely have had multiple G.I. Joe crossovers.

O: Yeah, but not Jem and the Holograms.  Like, I think the last IDW Jem and the Holograms was kind of weird because it didn't- it didn't tie in with the rest of like, the Hasbroverse.

S: Mm.

O: Anyway, I'm sorry, tangent!  It just cracks me up that's all.

S: [laughs] The Rainmakers popped up in a season one episode, in G1, when the Autobots had to visit Cybertron.

O: Misfire doesn't show up in G1 till like, very late season four, and by late I mean, season four only has like, what?  Three episodes?

S: Mm.

O: But, you know what I mean!  And he's more widely known from his IDW appearance with the Scavengers, who are ‘sirs not appearing in this comic’.

S: And also for his incredibly bad name-

B: [laugh]

S: And also for his imp- incredibly bad aim, for which, poor Misfire gets his name.

O: Rainbow Dash suggests doing the ‘Flying Foxtrot.’

S: Which Windblade, understandably, is not familiar with.

O: And I'm half convinced that Rainbow Dash made it up, but whatever!  This entire thing seems to be baiting the Cons into shooting heat seeking missiles at the two of them, and then nyrooming behind them so that the missiles hit the Cons instead.

S: The comic ends with Rainbow Dash and Windblade agreeing to a tie and sitting atop a pile of Rainmakers and Misfire.  Who all look like they are regretting their life choices.

O: They were defeated by a pony, [speaks while laughing] I would hope they were regretting their life choices! [returns to speaking normally] Issue 4, part 1, is, “Strength in Numbers,” featuring Applejack and the Insecticons.

S: It opens with Applejack being very upset that there are some giant ass bugs in her orchard, eating everything.  And, I mean, she unfortunately has a super big pest problem here.

O: Which is a bad thing when her entire income is dependent upon farming.

S: Yep.  The Insecticon horde is very happy, and surprisingly cute as they munch on delicious apples and trees.

O: Applejack attempts to chase them off in multiple ways… none of which work.

S: Spraying them with the hose, hitting them with rakes, spraying them with the hose again, and then trying to push them off the apple trees.

O: Back inside her house, she brainstorms more things to try when Discord appears out of nowhere and she too is like, “Are you playin’ a prank, Discord!?”

S: Well, if i lived in ponyverse or-

O: Equestria.

S: Equestria, I think that might have been my first thought too.

O: I mean, fair.  Giant insects are eating her apples.  Like, who else could do that but Discord on a normal day? [laughs]

S: Mm-hmm.  However, Discord says that this stuff is too mundane to be one of his pranks.

O: Applejack asks for his help.  He declines, as he'd much prefer to watch this madness, but he does summon all of the Apple Family to aid Applejack.

S: The Apple Clan is here!

O: No, really, like, ALL of them are here.  And I am not listing them off, because it's pretty much every single Apple character that appeared in the show at some point.

S: So all of the Apple Clan charge in, and I'm kind of wondering now if he like, showed up and briefed them all- just-

O: [laughs] I think they all saw through the portal, and saw bugs eating apples and were like, “My people are calling me!” [laughs]

S: My- my home needs me!

O: My home needs me, exactly.

S: Babs Seed, Big Mac, and Apple Bloom take out an insecticon by themselves by kicking it,

O: Which are Applejack's cousin, older brother, and little sister, respectively.

S: Several other Apples take out other Insecticons with ropes.

O: And an elderly Apple accidentally kicks one of Bombshell's Cerebral Shells back onto him and then orders him to go away while she's sort of flailing.

S: Accidental mind control, here we are!

O: And the day is saved thanks to the Apples, and we move on to the final chapter of the crossover fittingly called, “Finale.”

S: We open in the Crystal Empire with one of the other princesses of Equestria, Princess Cadence, as several of Twilight’s students report back to her that the Decepticons are nowhere to be found, but are likely planning an attack according to the Autobots.

O: Speaking of attack!

S: [sighs] The wall is smashed in as Megatron, Queen Chrysalis, and their allies arrive and demand that they hand over all the magical artifacts.

O: Twilight Sparkle and Optimus arrive just in time.

S: Optimus attempts to get Megatron to leave with politeness.

O: Surprising no one who's dealt with Megatron for more than 10 seconds, he declines. [laughs]

S: And with a combined call of, “Transform and trot out!” and, “Till everypony are one!”  …Oh, so grammatically incorrect.

O: [laughs]

S: The Autobots and their allies go on the offensive.

O: And I get secondhand embarrassment from those lines existing in a printed form.

S: Pinkie Pie throws a pie in poor Soundwave's face.

O: And we get a pretty great two-page spread where a variety of things are happening...

S: Rarity is riding in Arcee's vehicle mode as they launch themselves at Shrapnel.

O: Optimus is punching the crap out of Starscream.

S: Megatron orders Shockwave to just get some magical shit already!

O: Bumblebee goes on a tangent about Equestria's tasteful decor.

S: More bickering back and forth, and went- then Twilight summons the orange cap of shame onto Megatron's Fusion Cannon.

O: For reference, this is referring to the fact that Megatron with his original alt can't normally be sold without said orange cap identifying that he's not a real gun.  Which was a thing that was put into place after- or like you know, late 80’s, early 90’s.  Um, at least, you know, he can't be sold without this in the states and personally I think it's fucking hilarious.

S: And through the powers of friendship and Spike's awesome skills, the Space Bridge opens and Spike and Grimlock come through and assist.  And this is dragon Spike.

O: Yes.

S: Not human Spike.

O: Oh- to which, dragon Spike is wearing adult human Spike’s exo suit though.

S: Mm-hm.

O: To make this more confusing, how many Spikes would you like to go around?  That sounds really dirty within the fandom- and I'm gonna move right along!

B: [laugh]

S: Twilight and Optimus use alicorn magic and the Matrix in tandem to send the Decepticons home.

O: One delightful tea and Energon party later… the Autobots arrive back home themselves.

S: Optimus then explodes the space bridge behind them to protect Equestria from the Decepticons.

O: Much to the sadness of the Autobots, who enjoyed their time with their new friends.

S: Unfortunately for the ponies, Shockwave might have figured out a way to bring them to Cybertron instead.

O: And on that sequel bait, the crossover ends.  And yes, there is actually a sequel that's been announced.  In fact, I think the first issue or two might be out, and we're definitely looking forward to reading it at some point.

S: I feel like I've definitely seen a cover…

O: Other than that, what were your thoughts and feelings about this crossover?

S: The colors and such were really nice, but the cartoony style that the My Little Pony artist used for the robots didn't really work for us.

O: And we want to add, we're not saying they're a bad artist!  It was merely a stylistic option that didn't mesh well for us, specifically for the robot characters.

S: Mm-hm.

O: Um, this was further compounded by the fact that normal- like, Transformers artists that we are more used to doing comics, were also involved in other issues.  And so, they were drawing the robots better, and then the ponies also didn't look like terribly off model or something.  So it was just less distracting when they were doing it.

S: Mm.

O: Overall the special was good, and we recommend it to you if you like Transformers and My Little Pony.

S: Not that you should, you know, wait for our recommendation or anything.

O: [laughs] Uh, the Fluttershy/Soundwave chapter was a standout for both of us.

S: It was very cute, and I really enjoyed how emotive the non-speaking cassettes were.

O: I loved seeing the poor man have to deal with Discord's nonsense.

S: I feel like... we could have done with something longer having him deal with Discord’s nonsense.

O: I- yeah, it was constrained in the way that they did this, where each- there were only four issues, and each issue was- was split into two parts.

S: Yeah, and it's only 24 pages an issue or something.  So it's very- they're very minimal and very constrained.

O: Right.

S: It's just an issue with the medium.  I also really enjoyed the Spike/Grimlock chapter, because it was nice to see them both admiring each other's qualities, and supporting each other, and just being so uplifting.

O: And cute!

S: Mm-hm.

O: My second favorite was probably the Pinkie Pie chapter though, because it was just completely batshit insane.  Uh, just- again, Shockwave had a whisk and a spatula, because he was planning on eating the ponies.  I- where do I go with that?  How do I make that better!?  I can't, that's the answer! [laughs]

S: Shockwave just really wants to- to practice his, um…

O: Culinary arts? [laughs]

S: Yeah. I don't know, the implication that Cybertronians have culinary arts is- it just kind of weirds me out.

O: [continues laughing] Yeah, but- but Gauge was like, “I have a recipe!”

S: I know!  Well, that's the entire implication, it's just like, oh.  Mm.

O: I love that we probably got more actual like, culinary cannon from a fucking My Little Pony crossover than any of the other Transformers comics combined!

S: Yeah.

O: That's weird! [laughs]

S: I mean, the fact that it does come from effectively a pre-war era does mean that we'd potentially get more culture.

O: Eh, yeah.  I mean, but I don't think this was pre-war.  It seemed like it was mid-war?

S: I know, but just the fact that the uh, IDW2 is mostly pre-war.

O: Ah, that's true, that's true.

S: The characters all felt in character, the relationships were entertaining and sweet, and barring the one artist everyone was very expressive.

O: And with that, thanks for joining us for our April Fools’ special.  We hope ya’ll enjoyed, join us next time as we go back to business with episode 43, The Golden Lagoon.

S: Yay.  And that just about wraps it up for us today.  Remember to check us out on Tumblr or Pillowfort as Afterspark-Podcast, for any additional information, show notes, or links you may have mentioned.  You can also find us on Facebook and Twitter at AftersparkPod (all one word), and various other locations by searching for ‘Afterspark Podcast’ such as AO3, iTunes, Spotify and Youtube, just to name a few.  And feel free to send us questions on Tumblr, Youtube or AO3.  Till next time, I'm Specs!

O: And I’m Owls!

S: Toodles.

[Outro Music]

[janellion]

bokay au drabble if possible

hi mackenzie bb!!! tysm for sending this in!! so i’m thinking abt a trip to the grocery store w bokay!! jing got me inspired w that ask abt what’s in the fridge ksjshs

a trip to the grocery store

the warm afternoon light shines through the windows of the car, painting the dash in dappled patches of pale yellow. a warm breeze, brought in from the speeding of the car, brings with it the smells of summer

bo’s hand is tapping on the steering wheel along to the song, humming under his breath to the chorus as we pull into the parking lot of the store 

putting the car park and turning it off, bo grins over at me before reaching his hand over for mine, pulling it to his lips and pressing a quick kiss to my knuckles with a waggle of his eyebrows 

i laugh at his antics, blowing him a kiss as i get out of the car, making sure to grab the reusable shopping bag from the back seat before i walk around to the front of the car. bo’s hand is already waiting for mine as i approach him, and i take it with a smile, relishing in the way his fingers fit perfectly between mine 

as we approach the front of the store, i slow down, bringing bo to a stop with me. “babe, you know we’re only here for 2 things, right?” i say, eyeing the man next to me, his excitement rolling off him in waves as he pulls me forward with a shake of his head 

“yes, yes for the party, i know!,” he says, grinning at me before his expression turns sheepish. “what were we supposed to bring, again?” 

i roll my eyes fondly at his question, heading into the store, letting go of his hand to reach for a basket. “we’re here for watermelon and cobbler filling ingredients,” i say, checking my phone as i walk for the message from the group chat. “sakura and daichi are bringing burgers, temmie and ushijima are doing sides, and kuroo and birb are hosting. that leaves us with dessert!” 

i look up from my phone to find bo has already wandered over to the produce section, looking at the giant bin of watermelons with a focused expression. upon hearing my approach, his eyes shoot up, going from the basket in my arm and back to me. he bounds over, hand already outstretched, a smile on his face and eyebrows raised 

i laugh, handing him the basket before wandering over to the watermelons. i look at them for a moment before glancing back up at bo

“i have,” i pause throwing my shoulders up in a shrug, “no idea how to tell which one of these is good” 

bo walks over to stand next to me, resting his elbow on my shoulder as we peer into the bin at the large stack of watermelons 

bo turns toward me with a grin on his face and a waggle of his eyebrows. “i say we just get the biggest one we can find,” is all he says before he’s handing me the basket and digging into the bin, emerging several moments later with a watermelon the size of a small child

“bo, babe,” my eyes widen at the large fruit in his arms, my lips pulling into a grin, “it’s PERFECT!”

i look from the watermelon to the basket in my arms, seeing bo do the same thing, a small pout on his face. “looks like you’re going to be carrying it while we’re here!” i laugh, going over and standing on my toes to place a quick kiss to his cheek, before pulling a way with a smile, “thanks for carrying it” 

at this, bo’s eyes light up, a grin spreading across his face. “anything for my girl,” he says, throwing me a wink and following after me as i head toward the rest of the fruit 

“what kind of cobbler should we make?” i turn to bo holding a large container of blueberries in my hand, watching as he picks through the peaches, the large watermelon tucked under his arm 

sensing the potentially terrible situation moments from happening, i quickly walk over, grabbing a peach from his hand and putting it in a bag, glancing down at the watermelon under his arm while raising my eyebrow 

“babe don’t worry! i have a handle on it,” he laughs, just as the smooth skin of the watermelon starts to slip down the fabric of his shirt, his eyes widening and his other hand going to help catch it before it slips any further down  

i laugh at his scrambling, going to grab a few more peaches and putting them in the basket along with the container of blueberries 

“looks like this is everything we need,” i say, heading toward the register, glancing back to see if bo is following me, only to feel a warm presence at my side and a kiss to the top of my head 

“you’re everything i need,” he pulls away, looking down at me with a grin and a wink, his golden eyes soft and twinkling 

“if you weren’t so cute, that kind of thing wouldn’t work,” i laugh at him, my hand going to his back to steer him in the direction of the register also bc have you seen his back?? any excuse to touch it i am TAKING IT

after paying for the groceries, we head over to the entrance of the store. as soon as we cross the threshold into the parking lot, bo looks around, noting the absence of cars and the open stretch of space from us to the car, before turning to me, eyebrows raised and excited smile on his face 

“usual rules?” i ask returning his smile

as soon as he nods, i’m taking off in the direction of the car, the grocery bag thrown over my shoulder, my laugh carrying on the wind as bo splutters behind me for a moment before running after me 

he catches up to me before reaching the car, as he always does, the watermelon swinging in his arms as his laugh joins mine on the air 

we both come to a stop at the car, bo placing the watermelon on the trunk to collect his reward. i roll my eyes fondly, standing on my tip toes to give him a quick kiss, before grabbing the keys in his outstretched hand 

“good thing we’re already almost to lexee’s to pick up her and kags, i wouldn’t want to listen to your music for another 30 minutes,” i tease, the soft tone of my voice betraying my words 

bo looks at me indignantly as he loads the groceries into the trunk, before shutting it, “hey hey! my music taste is good! immaculate, even!” 

i snicker at his words, getting in the driver’s side and adjusting the seat. “you and kuroo are the only ones that think that,” i point out, looking over at him as he connects his phone to the stereo 

“yeah, maybe” he grins over at me, eyebrows raised, as he cues up the first song, “but you love me” 

“yeah,” i laugh, turning to him and grabbing his hand in mine as the opening notes of the song fill the air around us, his first pick one of my new favorites, “i do” 

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thank you for being so patient waiting for this!! i hope that you enjoy it!! 

bokay taglist 🌻 (y’all own my heart) : @deadontheinsidebut @stcrryskies @sstardusty @zoni @kuronekomama @anianimol

some folks who may enjoy this: @strawbirb @sakusakxyoomi @shoyosun @oyakags

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kayla’s 200/250 sleepover and celebration!! 🥰✨