#only top tier moments from top tier captains of the ship

[livelovecaliforniadreams]

[kit-williams]

If you want prompts to work on you got any ideas for being stalked by an astartes? I got into the rogue trader game andy god the astartes companion is doing something to me.

Idk I just enjoy the idea that on planet or in a ship you can only hide from something stronger and smarter then you for so long.

So you and @bispecsual both were inspired by the Rogue Trader game so I will be tying together both of the asks. Though theirs was more about "holding a lot more power than the usual darling but still having this man be rabidly devoted to her." and "oh he’s a freak… jokes on you I’m into that 😏"

However neither of you gave me a chapter so I asked my husband what chapter to write it for his pick: Drumroll

ALPHA LEGION

Also Serax's voice is based kinda off of the way Warrior Tier does in his alpha legion video

As for Rowena Beaumont... her appearance is whatever the reader wants to be however given a rogue trader prompt I could not resist giving them an over the top name!

tw: SEX THERES SEX also yandere behavior... implied stalking and manipulation... obsessive

Serax had quite a good deal going on. He enjoyed the Rogue Trader he was attached too Lord Captain Rowena Beaumont... Lady Rowena in proper company... Beau to those whom she lures to her bed... and his teasing calling her -ena. Ah yes wouldn't it be nice to have his 'ena call him Serax at night instead of Sven. He was playing the roll of a Vlka Fenryka and perhaps he was playing it too well... for the Mistress of the ship had gotten under Serax's skin.

She was horribly over the top. She was loud. She was a brat... such a brat and he could tell she loved it when he, as Sven, scolded her. Of course, he couldn't do much to her and much less given his cover... but why would he want to drive her away? But it was so easy to play the roll of the brutish Vlka Fenryka as she had told him when he had tried to 'scare' her away from getting too close... she was a gremlin and had announced "Jokes on you I like that!"

Everything was perfect... The blare of the horn as he could tell the gelar field flickered and one of his hearts sank. But that was probably from being thrown by the sudden demonette, that he quickly crushed, before he rushed down the halls to find Rowena. He felt a second hand embarrassment as he howled like the wolf that he was pretending to be.

"SVEN GET YOUR HAIRY ASS OVER HERE!" He hears her shriek before firing her weapon a few more times as she has to make her way to the bridge to get her ship under control. "IF I GET ONE MORE CALL FROM YOU LOT I WILL MURDER SOMEONE!" Again she screams, he sees her only half dressed but no armor on at all as she swings her saber.

"What are you daft puppy?" He snarls out like the protective wolf he was being as he picks her up before backhanding a warped individual. "Is my pup alright?"

"No! Someone tried to kill me in my sleep! I did not get my full rest! And now my ship is falling apart!" She lets out a scream as she grabs a gun and just shoots into one corrupted individual a few too many times. "Puppy lets get you to the bridge."

Rowena clings to her smelly Sven... it wasn't bath day yet. But she watched him be the killing machine that he was always so skilled in what he does... though she found he, like a lost dog, followed the hand that fed him. Which in that case was hers and Rowena did not mind one bit of having a space marine to her beck and call. Besides it was also a bit of a flaunt to also get her world rocked by Sven nearly every night.

"Look out!" Sven shouted as he turned his back to the corrupted crew shooting at them. Rowena watched Sven's pauldron turn teal for a moment... seeing a green hydra in the place of a wolf before it returned to normal before he fired back.

"Oh Sven." Rowena cooed, "You keep me so safe what would I do without you?"

"Hmm probably be dead. Full of a lot more holes... maybe," He lowers his voice an octave, "be less stretched out... less ruined for mortal men perhaps." He laughed as he looked down at the Rogue Trader biting her bottom lip and looking at him with bedroom eyes. Serax grunted looking away, "Not now puppy." He growls softly.

"Later?" She coos rubbing his chestplate.

"If you're a good girl." He feels her lean back, giggle, and kick her feet in joy. She was such a funny little creature.

------

Rowena drums her fingers as she finally got her ship back in order but something was bothering her. The sigil that was on his pauldron... it itched a memory in the back of her mind. Grandpapa told her to fear the hydra though... there was a hydra in their heraldry... a bloodline that could be traced back to when the Emperor was walking around. She always figured it was to mean fear of betrayals but what did the hydra mean.

She hummed as she dismissed herself from the bridge and returned to her room and went into the forbidden library. Oh yes she was suppose to hand these books over to the Inquisition for being heretical and some in xenos origin. Some were heirlooms and she grabs the ones she remembers that had a hydra in them.

Hermetic Tablets of Black Conspiracies, Yesteryear of yearning, Demented Book of Lost Poems, Restoration Of The Frontline, Avoiding The Fires, Dog Of The Forsaken, Omnibus of Enigma, Mistress Alayne's Text of Runes, Invader Of The Void, Neighbors Of The Forest, Armies Of The Curse, Thieves Of Time, Understanding New Technology, Scrolls of Whitchcraft. She frowned not understanding what all of these have in common but Rowena hardly has the time. Besides she is the Rogue Trader and he is on her ship!

She hums as she heads to his room.

----

Serax looks to Rowena feeling his stomach drop as she says just looking at one of his trinkets. "Hiding anything?" He forces out a laugh, "Lady Rowena I'm but a simple wolf. I hardly need to hide anything from you."

"So why did your pauldron turn teal? And don't you fuckin gaslight me! I am the fuckin' queen of Gaslighting, Gatekeeping, and Girlbossing!"

He sighed and watched Rowena jump as the door locked behind her and her microbead and other tech cutting her off from the rest of the ship. She turned around and was grabbed and pressed to the door as red lenses glowed in the dark of the room as he tilted his head his voice sounding different. "Lady Rowena." He purrs and he watches her eyes widen... not expecting that reaction?

"Wha-wha-wha-" Is all she can manage. Before he puts his thumb on her tongue.

"Hush puppy," He rumbles in that deep and to Rowena very seductive timber, "you're not suppose to know about this. Normally... puppies who find out get put down. But... you are my puppy. And normally I would want an adversary to figure out what I am verses your accidental discovery." He watches her tongue move against his thumb tasting the bitter tang of sweat and some iron from what he was tinkering on, his chest rumbles. "Always a naughty puppy. Aren't you? Yes you're Serax's naughty girl." He knew where that rumble went... watching her latch onto his thumb and suck as her thighs closed tightly. Yes Mistress Rowena was always in control... prim... proper... always playing chess with foes around her... political machinations and she was very much like a puppy playing with rabid wolves.

Emperor bless her that Serax found himself in her service to help keep this little puppy alive and in charge. "You know puppy... how much I've been helping you? I deserve to be rewarded... " He groans just looking at his Rowena. He had stalked her before as he originally just needed to be ferried from one place to another and her family was deeply tied to the legion. But she was hardly what he expected from a rogue trader... young and eyes full of stars.

"What do you want..." She moans softly just whimpering as Serax moved his fingers against her groin fingering her through her clothes.

"I want you to scream my name. My name is Serax by the way... get on the bed. And yes 'ena... I'm going to continue to ruin you for mortals." He lets her go and watches her scramble to get onto his bed just looking at him with an eager vibration as she starts to strip and he walks to the machine that will remove his armor. He looks to his puppy and see how eager she is given how her legs are spread wide and two fingers are deep in her sex. "Yes play with yourself." He hums just lazily stroking his cock as he looks at her with the same devotion he would look at her as Sven. "Such a silly puppy... you practically walked right to me. Face down ass up puppy. Good girl. You just needed a firm hand to help guide you. And my legion is all about being the faceless guiding hand working in the shadows... oh yes puppy you're going to keep rejecting those marriage agreements because you have me." He says as he crawls up behind Rowena.

She whimpers into the pillow, dripping wet, as Sven no Serax's voice is pure seduction. She yelps as he slaps, gently for him, her ass causing her to moan into the pillow. He pushes into her inviting cunt as he starts a slow pace. Oh yes he's wanted and imagined fucking the Rogue Trader here in his simple quarters verses her pompous room. His hand grips her hair pulling back as he notices her burying her face into his pillow, "Bad puppy I said I wanted you to scream my name."

"SERAX!" Rowena yelps out as he thrusts into her hard. His girthy cock tickling her clit as his balls clap against her flesh. "Oh God oh Throne oh God!" She pants out in prayer.

"No Emperor here only me. Oh yes tell the Sister of Battle what I said... we both know whom you're going to pick, puppy. Tell me who is puppy going to pick?"

"You... " She moans as he lightly spanks her, "You Serax!" She can feel sweat start to form as fucking a space marine is a full contact sport almost. While Serax was just casually fucking she felt like her whole body was being thrown through the paces.

"Good girl." He groaned as he picked up his pace as he holds her hips tighter being as gentle as he can but really... she can afford to get her hips fixed from an Astartes fucking her. He grunt louder as she screams his name again feeling her walls form a vice grip around his cock. He lets out a low strained groan as he tries not to cum bucking his hips and fucking her through her orgasm. He pants out 'puppy' over and over. Yes he really does just sees her as a cute little dog for him to dote upon and train.

He flips her over grabbing her under her knees and spreading her legs watching her as she gets glassy eyed watching the way his cock vanishes into her sex and causes her to bulge slightly. Its the way she looks at him so helplessly and just putting so much trust into his hands that's what gets Serax off groaning and cumming deep in her. Bottoming out and rocking his hips as his toes curl and he groans softly.

He pulls out and leans in kissing her hard as she whimpers so helplessly... oh yes he made sure that she was the perfect little puppy... making sure she got her write of passage... making sure she would be open to him... he moans into the kiss pulling her to his lap. But of course he won't tell his little puppy just how perfectly he made her for him... she might try to get rid of him. Of course, she was going to get Sven outside of this room but whenever she wanted to experience a far more honest version of himself... all she had to do was come to the Hydra lair.

[japeneselunchtimerush]

Akashi for the ship tier list please, because i'm very predictable

I knew I could count on you to give me want I want(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Ok Im not going to give a long explanation about each ship. But I totally am going to give an explanation about most of them.

Senpai♡♡♡: My top 1(they share a position) ships with Akashi, his first captain(and love) and his shadow. I could go on a rant about why they both make such good pairs but then this post would exceed 100,000 words. Ill just conclude by saying that they are top tier(literally)

SS+: MidoAka & TakaAka(they are a package deal) are absolutely adorable. I live both of them Individually but I prefer TakaAka along witb Mido(because MidoTakaAka is superior)

MibuAka: Ive already explained my thoughts on these two about a 100 times so ill just summarize. Both of them love each other so much it doesnt even matter whether its romantic or platonic. Reo just cares about Akashi so much and Akashi views Reo as someone so special to him its just a very good ship.

NashAka: Nash has a crush on Akashi. Enough said.

AoAka: Also have spoken about them quite a bit. Their friendship is so sweet and they have so much trust and faith in each other. They think so highly of eachother. Plus that dialogue in the kuroko's birthday ova was very cute.

KiAka: Very cute and fluffy pairing. Akashi saw Kise's potential from the beginning and encourage him to grow. Kise would definitely include akashi in a bunch of them and make him happy.

SS: This post is getting very long and I want to talk more about the other tiers so ill just include all of them here. All of these ships are very cute and Akashi would benefit a lot from these relationships. The friendships alone are great and the characters themselves are some of Akashi's greatest friends. Riko and Akashi would be a spectacular duo and im not elaborating any further.

I read one fic about these and I see the vision: I read a HanaAka fic(Beyond the waiting room and its sequel by sweet rosei) and I absolutely adored it. It does not only have the ship but it also talks about akashi's mental health, the selectivism about violence and Hanamiya's violence as well. Overall great fic 10/10 would recommend. Im definitely more open to this ship because of it.

OgiAka is a very special ship. I imagine that after the winter cup the GoM apologise to Ogiwara for the 111-11 match and afterwards Ogiwara asks akashi whether he likes basketball and this time Akashi says yes and I think it would be a very cute moment between the two.

Brothers: I know that AkaAka is a ship(pretty weird if you ask me) but I really cant see them as anything other than brothers. They love and care for each other more than anything. Bokushi was created to protect Oreshi and would do anything for him. One of my favorite things about them is thr character song "Return" when Akashi says " Now along with my other self" or something along those lines and its just so sweet that Oreshi is bringing his little brother with him on his healing journey.

Polyam: NijiHaiAka and MuraHimuAka that is all

Respect it but no thanks: Ive already explained my thoughts on AkaFuri before. All I will say is that I prefer their friendship more than their romantic relationship. Mostly because the fandom ruined it for me.

Soulbonded: Akashi and Kuroko's relationship cannot be justified with a word as simple as romance. Their bond is so deep it goes deeper than the mariana trench.

This still ended up being long as hell. Oh well

[girlbossblackbeard]

s2 ep3 delirious ramblings in honor of eps 4 and 5 coming soon!!

you already KNOW wtf goin on !!!

-the red flag fleet pig tails absolutely slay every single time

-Zheng Yi Sao putting her arm out to shield Olu from the dying guy that just got stabbed has me feeling some typa way (falling in love with her)

-stede just pushing his little bar and charcuterie cart around im obsessed

-Zheng Yi Sao's customer service voice when she says "Hi! I'm Zheng Yi Sao, you're...John?" like she's cold-calling someone is absolutely top tier, I would give her all my money if she were calling to scam me

-"champers?" stede you absolute doofus i love him far too much

-Zheng Yi Sao being all coy with her "ohh...forget it...;)" stop!!!!! im already in love with you please stop this madness!!!!!! i can't take much more of it!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-OLU'S OFFENDED FACE WHEN STEDE JUST PLOPS THE TOWELS DOWN ON ZHENG YI SAO'S DESK LMAO

-okay. we have to talk about stede hearing "the revenge" and his mind going completely blank aside from the one thought of "Ed" replaying over and over and over again to the point that all sense of self-preservation flies completely out the window (as he flies over the side of the ship) because the ONLY thing that matters to him in that moment is seeing Ed again. i can only imagine the looming sense of doom he must've felt as he realized Ed was noticeably absent from the rest of the crew when he found them, and then the cagey way they all spoke about where Ed went. i wonder if seeing Ed's body lying on that table gave him any sense of relief in the way that getting confirmation of something you'd feared was coming finally arrives

-also!!! let's talk about what must have started running through Olu's mind when he realized it was their ship!! did he immediately think of Jim? was he worried about them? did he assume they would've escaped blackbeard's clutches by now and gone on to bigger and better things?

-"she's returned to us...mostly" i wonder how sad buttons must have felt seeing the revenge in such a dire state :((

-"maybe she's gone through that triangle thing by bermuda" wee john my beloved

-I TOLD Y'ALL WHEN THAT MF GNOSSIENNE NO. 5 HITS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS GONNA BE THE DEATH OF ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND IT VERY NEARLY WAS BITCH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-oh holy fuck the way the look of excitement on stede's face morphs into a look of horror as he takes in just how wrecked the revenge got in the storm is extremely upsetting

-someone smarter than me needs to do a deeper analysis on the use of gnossienne no.5 as stede is climbing the ladder of the revenge, no doubt with thoughts of a beautiful and loving reunion with ed because surely he'll be there waiting for him, just as overjoyed to see stede as stede is to see him, only for the song and that fantasy to abruptly get cut off once stede realizes how dire the situation on the revenge has gotten

-hey fam do we think there's any significance of the crew being found desecrating that seagull in the captain's quarters or was that just a plot convenience thing bc obviously stede would check the captain's cabin for ed first

-"just thought you'd be taller...mu-muscly, you know...charismatic" bruh ain't NO way Certain People had been either 1) talking about stede in such a high regard it put him up on a massive pedestal or 2) ahem....sobbing so loudly the entire god damn ship can hear it every single night for literal months...that archie fully thought stede MUST have been basically a god amongst mortals to make ed be so downbad it drove him to violent insanity

-"why can't i get a straight answer from any of you" because they're all gay bitch!!!!! you knew this when you first hired them!!!!!!

-OBSESSED with how Izzy is fully down an entire leg and Stede could NOT give less of a shit about it. Literally telling him "Piss off Izzy, I don't wanna hear from you" as if there isn't the biggest possible elephant on the deck basically screaming to be talked about

-side note: for the love of GOD con o'neill looks so stupidly hot in his reaction shot to stede telling izzy to piss off it's actually gonna give me heart palpitations. this is my formal petition to make con o'neill look permanently just a little bit damp and a little bit sad

-"when you get old, if you don't wanna work anymore you can just give up i guess" frenchie my beloved

-love love love love love the parallels between buttons and auntie being the actual paragon of first mates with almost preternatural senses for mutiny a'brewin or the sea shifting

-hey fam do we think izzy actually stabbed stede's painting or was it really ed and izzy was...sparing stede's feelings???? but why??? is it because he's intimately aware of how it feels to lose ed and even though he hates stede (or used to) he still wouldn't wish that kind of pain on anyone??

-SORRY I GOTTA TOOT MY OWN HORN FOR A SECOND BECAUSE I CALLED IT FROM THE MOMENT THE TEASER DROPPED THAT THE RAG MAN WAS GONNA BE HORNIGOLD'S GHOST MANIFESTING AS THE PARTS OF ED HE HATED THE MOST

>>>it turned out to be all parts of himself which did me quite a big ouchie but im still riding the high of having sussed that out so early on im LITERALLY destined to be a writer on this show. djenks get at me i know ur reading this

-i have absolutely no idea what the pig is supposed to symbolize in ed's fever dream someone who has a functioning brain should figure it out and let me know pls & thx

-don't know if this is significant symbolism or not, but: ed is wearing the cravat, his chains, and the pearl necklace in the storm. he is NOT wearing the cravat or the chains in the fever dream, but he IS still wearing the pearls. the best analysis i can do around that rn is that the cravat symbolizes stede and this journey he's about to go on needs to be about Ed and Ed alone, but also Ed *feeling* and *thinking* he's genuinely alone, which is supported by the conversation he has with hornigold later when he reveals he's worried there's no one waiting for him in the real world. the chains im thinking could symbolize his blackbeard persona in a way - presumably he got the gold chains when plundering and gaining/maintaining his reputation for being ruthless and the chains are a physical reminder of that persona and reputation. in the fever dream, ed is stripped down to his most vulnerable state (which is interesting considering his hair and beard aren't in line with the s1 symbolism of his vulnerability - almost as if his heartbreak over stede has become so all-encompassing he's no longer able to hide it behind a beard or face-shielding long hair) so the chains would disappear just as his blackbeard reputation would disappear in order for him to get to the core of who he really is, which brings us to: the pearl necklace. we could literally talk for hours about the nuances of everything the pearl necklace represents regarding ed's fears, desires, identities, hopes and dreams for the future, childhood trauma, etc. etc. etc. but ultimately it represents the parts of ed he holds the closest to his chest and THAT is why he's still wearing it in the fever dream: because it's a representation of who he truly is, stripped down, at his core. and THAT is the person who needed to go on this journey in order to start to heal, without the influence of anyone or anything else making him feel the need to perform or be anything other than his 100% authentic, vulnerable self.

-the way i reacted to seeing how beautiful ed is as he's waking up in hornigold's hut is undeniable proof that i need to be put down

-"what did you do to me...while i was out...anything weird?" edward teach my beloved of all time. we will not be taking this incredibly funny and perfectly performed line delivery and making it sad by thinking about the implications of what past behaviors ed may have experienced from other shipmates when waking up after a night of blacking out

-sorry but the way ed holds his breath so he doesn't eat the soup is so hilarious and adorable to me

-auntie recounting all the details of the mutiny right down to ed's height and silver hair based off of looking at the deck and licking some gun powder is sooooooo sherlock holmes coded but like. if he fucked y'know?

-also!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the little sprinkle of what i believe was maori thrown in between auntie and fang!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i need more of that IMMEDIATELY

-"i'm burnin up here" SICK jobros reference frenchie

-frenchie stopping himself from saying "oh fuck" and instead going with "oh shit tits" i love this man an unhealthy amount

-"it's called you-cal-lip-eh-tusses. you-calamitous." good god i would due for olu in a heartbeat

-okay so. my thoughts on the olu/zheng/jim/archie situation. i never posted this here when the trailer dropped bc i thought i was just going crazy but when i saw the olu/jim shoulder bump i immediately knew it was giving "exes who are still friends and are being supportive of the other person when they admit they've found someone new" vibes. THAT BEING SAID - i can see this whole thing being resolved in 2 ways: either they have jim and olu talk it out and officially decide to split to pursue their respective new flames while remaining best friends/family, or - and this is where i think we all hope this is going - we get a 4-way polycule. im 50/50 on whether the studio would greenlight that given they've already pushed the envelope with having a nonbinary character and basically everyone is gay, but at the same time i would hope the studio would recognize that the show was wildly successful due in large part to those key elements and would be in favor of pushing the envelope even further (in their eyes). i think jim and archie are gonna see zheng being an absolute badass and fall in love with her and zheng is gonna see jim and archie being absolute badasses and fall in love with them while already being in love with olu specifically because he's NOT a badass and olu's gonna admit he's still in love with jim and they're all gonna live happily ever after completely dominating the seas and killing colonizing dipshits :)

-OLU WHIPPING HIS HEAD AROUND TO LOOK BACK AT JIM WHEN THEY TELL HIM THEY SAW ARCHIE'S BOOBS LMAO

-hi it's me again here to say that it is STILL SO EXTREMELY FUCKED UP AND EVIL OF DAVID JENKINS AND CO. TO BE PLAYING GNOSSIENNE NO.5 WHILE STEDE LOOKS DESPONDENTLY AT THE RUINED REMAINS OF HIS CAPTAINS QUARTERS WHERE HE AND ED CONNECTED FOR THE FIRST TIME AND FELT LIKE SOMEONE FINALLY UNDERSTOOD THEM

-how the fuck did izzy on a crutch and a pegleg sneak up on stede in the captain's quarters lil homie HAS to be sounding like mr. krabs at this point

-"i think the knives really help bring the place together" he literally cannot physically bring himself to not be a bitch around izzy even when he's wallowing in his lost love i am so so so obsessed with him you have no idea

-i know we're all still reeling from the confirmation that stede has ALWAYS known ed - past the rose-colored glasses of falling in love with just the idea of someone - and how his mind works when he asks izzy point blank what they did to ed but. i cannot stop thinking about s1 ed not being able to look stede in the eye as he says "you were always gonna realize what i am" before leaving with calico jack because he was so terrified of the judgement he'd see in stede's eyes. he revealed a less-than-ideal (but comparatively pretty benign) part of himself to the person whose opinion he cares about the most and was too afraid to stick around to see if/when stede would finally reject him for not living up to the standards that ed thinks stede deserves. and yet. we now know with actual proof that stede not only never judged ed for his past and just kinda glossed over any erratic behavior/violent reactions during their time together in favor of keeping an idealized image of ed in his mind, stede understood ed on a deeper level than practically anyone else in the whole world, with the exception of izzy, ever did. stede was so intimately aware of the exact kind of person ed was and what his thoughts and behavioral patterns were that he knew without a shadow of a doubt that there were only two fates for ed if stede didn't reach him in time: he was either gonna watch the world burn or die trying.

-feeling BIG emotions over the almost-sigh that stede does when izzy tells him how ed took his leg for merely mentioning stede's name. the way he looks away and swallows down his guilt and grief and shame.

-"you sent him to doggy heaven" ohhhh my god i wanna know if stede was bracing himself for the heartbreak or the relief (or both!!) of hearing izzy say yes. as i mentioned above, stede had to have had a cloud of impending doom looming over him all these months wondering where ed is and worrying if he'll ever find him again, and that cloud must have only gotten infinitely darker when he found the crew on the revenge only to realize that ed wasn't with them. stede isn't stupid, he proved as much when he told izzy he knew ed was going to destroy everything around him or die in the process, and with ed being very noticeably absent it would only make sense for stede to jump to the worst-case-scenario of the crew having to kill ed before he killed all of them. i think he had probably been emotionally preparing himself for that outcome the second he noticed the crew being shifty about ed's whereabouts, so to get confirmation of it would obviously be genuinely heartbreaking but also an end to the sense of doom that had been hanging around him for a while.

-the way stede whips his head around to look at izzy when izzy tells him no, they didn't send ed to doggy heaven is so! heartbreaking! because you can see the instant flame of hope light up his face for a split second before he reads the profound sadness of izzy's expression as he tells stede they deserted him on a beach and left nature to do the rest. interestingly enough, stede doesn't seem at all reassured or renewed in his hope by this, and im wondering if he knows izzy is lying to him at that point to spare his feelings

-"yeah i was there. that cabin boy's name was felix. he was a really nice guy" i love that we're not only getting a crumb of lore about ed's past on hornigold's ship (that isn't frat-bro posturing with calico jack) but that the crumb we do get highlights ed's humanity. not only does he remember the name of a "lowly" cabin boy, but he remembers that the cabin boy was really nice and is angry that he died so senselessly and hornigold doesn't even seem to care

>>>>>hmmmm now im thinking about how hornigold is a representation of the parts of ed that he hates, so is hornigold's story an allegory for how ed hates how he's shut off his emotions/shown little to no remorse for the hurt and suffering he's caused during his breakup era?

-okay there are SO many mentions of soup this season already someone figure out wtf it's supposed to mean

-THE WAY MY FRIENDS AND I ACTUALLY SCREAMED WHEN ZHENG SAYS "Girl, how are you :(" TO STEDE LIKE THIS SHOW IS 100% CONFIRMED WRITTEN FOR THE GIRLS (gn) AND THE GAYS AND EVERY LINE IS PERFECT

-DAVID JENKINS. WHY. ARE YOU PLAYING. GNOSSIENNE NO.5. WHILE STEDE TELLS ZHENG. ABOUT HOW HE FEELS LIKE HE LET ED DOWN. AND THAT HE'S THE CAUSE OF A LOT OF THIS. AND HOW HE SHOULD'VE JUST TOLD ED HOW HE FEELS. BUT HE WAS SCARED. AND NOW HERE WE ARE. i want you psychologically evaluated because i do believe there is a dark evil inside of you

-PLEASE stede's reaction of basically "ya got me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯" to Zheng saying the guys on wanted posters are hot makes my brain fizz

-im not ashamed to say i literally get tears in my eyes from how divine ed looks when he's talking to hornigold about selling handmade shoes like what the fuck did the hair and makeup artists DO to make him even more stunning than before when they had already broken the scale in s1???????????? i feel like i should send them a thank-you care package for the gift they've given us

-"im actually just a very simple man" my sweet precious baby darling eddie boy. you are the most complex character i have ever become obsessed with in my entire life, and i was DEEP in the Castiel trenches at the height of SuperWhoLock tumblr from 2012 - 2014 as an unmedicated teenager still developing her prefrontal cortex.

-"like a jailer, but all the prisoners like you and they can go whenever they want" so what im hearing is ed likes having control over other people but also desperately wants them to like him AND choose to stay with him of their own free will and not because they have to. or it's just a funny simile for an inn like he said :)

-the jeff's inn by the sea roleplay scene makes me so insane i actually can't talk about it rn other than to say it's peak comedy and i want it permanently etched into my brain. also ed's little corsage makes me [feral shrieking]

-GODDD the way this season is so expertly slicing in clips from s1 as a quick flash of an image before coming back to the present is so extremely satisfying and also a direct punch to the solar plexis every time

-"grown man covered in tattoos, eh? with daddy issues?" no comment just screaming

-"we've been living second-to-second for a while now. it's actually kinda nice to have a deadline" this!!! this is what im talking about with the looming sense of impending doom hanging over you for so long that once you get confirmation that it's going to be over soon, even if it's because of a very permanent ending, there's a lot of relief that can be wrapped up in that

-"go on, bonnet. gimme your worst" i feel like i don't have the brain capacity rn to break that interaction down and tease out what izzy would've been expecting stede to do or say and what stede would've been thinking in that moment that was too overwhelming to actually voice but maybe someday i'll get to it

-"okay well i feel like im gonna choose...i feel like im supposed to choose...live" bbbbbbbbbrrrrrrrrrrooooooooooo the intentional writing of ed to say "gonna" at first and then switching it to "supposed to" is sooooooooo insane dude holy shit. i need to know what factors caused him to change his wording. what was he going to say he was gonna do. who or what is pressuring him to make him feel like he's supposed to choose to live. are those two choices - what he was gonna do vs. what he feels like he's supposed to do - at war with each other or is the conflict brewing from the different motivations behind wanting to live vs. feeling like you're supposed to live. the writing is just too good

-godddd someone needs to make a post on hornigold telling ed they're in a judgement-free zone which is basically ed reminding himself that his mind is a safe space for his thoughts and how unbelievably sad it is that ed would even need to remind himself of that in the first place. he's so used to scrutiny and judgement (and it's one of his biggest fears when it comes to the people he cares about the most) that he doesn't even think he's free from it in his own head

-im just gonna say it. ed talking about warmth and intercourse and orgasms is foreshadowing

-"i don't think anyone's waiting for me" i'll actually go lie in the middle of the road right now i swear to god

-it's so interesting how ed gets angry that his fear that no one is waiting for him fucks his pros up

-i don't understand how olu didn't immediately clock that zheng was flirting with him when he's in her office like buddy if i see a very beautiful woman with a very sharp sword and she's pointing it in my direction? that's a marriage proposal

-HOKAYYYY FOLKS WE GOTTA TALK ABOUT OUR FIRST TRUE COMPETENT!STEDE SIGHTING IN THIS EP. he not only devises an escape plan ALL BY HIMSELF, he has the knowledge and foresight to . and guess what? IT ACTUALLY. WORKED. in fact, it was a SWEEPING success where he got EVERYONE safely off the red flag ship and onto his own!!!! this wasn't just some raid won with brute force or a fuckery accomplished due to loony tunes rules, this was an honest-to-god escape plan that required learning the shifts of the guards on deck and at the entrance to the brig to ensure those spaces would be as empty as possible, knowledge of the sleepy-time effects of chamomile in concentrated forms, knowledge of the layout of the ship he's been on for, what? a few days? maybe a week?, knowledge of where they store their weapons and then figuring out how to use the crossbow as a zipline AND remembering to have someone cut the line to prevent any red flag crew from boarding the revenge, figuring out how they can use towels to use said zipline, remembering that the revenge no longer has a wheel and utilizing wee john's strength to secure them a new one while disabling the red flag ship thus greatly increasing their chances of a successful escape. i guess now we know what the hell is going on in towels (it's scheming and plotting)

-jim grabbing archie's hand has they leave the brig

-stede's little hand gesture and "sss" noise he makes to communicate to lucius and black pete they're gonna move forward now even though they're all physically so close it literally would've been quieter if he just whispered his directions to them

-the person at the wheel looking longingly up into the sky. how much do we wanna bet she was thinking about zheng

-"just breathe into it black pe-" WHY ARE THEY SHUSHING MY BOY BUTTONS HE'S RIGHT

-"oy, ya cockeyed -" STOP SILENCING HIM

-"aye look at that, see that black pete -" LET HIM SPEAK

-IZZY PUSHING BUTTONS'S HAND DOWN AS HE'S TELLING BLACK PETE TO OBSERVE ARCHIE'S SHOOTING FORM IS EVERYTHING TO ME

-wee john profusely apologizing to the person he knocked unconscious before knocking them unconscious and then again after stealing their wheel. he is so dear to me

-i genuinely love how buttons wastes NO time in assuming his first mate duties again and directing frenchie and roach to start preparing the ship for sailing. it's just a nice reminder that stede chose him as his first mate for a reason beyond his propensity to attract a motley crew of unique characters - buttons is a genuinely highly skilled, highly competent, and extremely dedicated and hard working sea farer. who may or may not actually be a sea witch that has taken on the form of a humble man

-i actually am very charmed by olu still trying to persuade zheng to spare the lives of his friends while they're making out

-ooooohhhhh the fact that olu had to choose between zheng and jim was such a delightful mini conflict to see him go through. i might wind up making a post about his thoughts and motivations in that moment later on because it's so quick but so profound

-okay 1) the raw emotions in zheng's yell when she sees olu escaping on the revenge literally gave me goosebumps. 2) the look of absolute betrayal on her face in that closing shot gave me even MORE goosebumps. 3) ALWAYS LISTEN TO YOUR SLIGHTLY SUPERNATURAL FIRST MATE Y'ALL THEY ALWAYS KNOW WHAT'S UP

-i can't wait to see how this betrayal plays out in terms of the red flag fleet being an enemy to the revenge, even though we know it's temporary since we've seen Zheng Yi Sao and her fleet fighting alongside ed and stede in the s2 trailer and in the promotional materials for upcoming episodes

-UHHHH STEDE'S HEARTBROKEN FACE AS THEY'RE LEAVING HELLO?????????????????????????????????

-izzy trying to genuinely thank stede is so. Character Arc.

-also archie and jim training/fake sword fighting in the background

-"clarity? you've made your choice" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

-ed realizing that he really just hates himself is going to be MY villain origin story

-what the HELL was up with hornigold doing that howl. hated that

-"i'm not loveable" "and you're scared to do anything about it" i swan to john im gonna start chewing on the steel cables that hold up suspension bridges you literally cannot do this to me right now

-hey so fun fact when kate bush's song kicked in i actually desperately wished someone would've given me one of those neat chamomile towels that makes you pass out instantly because :) i am wholly unequipped :) to hear that song :) in the context of this next scene :))))

-seriously if you haven't read the lyrics to that song yet, first contact your local veterinarian's office and schedule and appointment to be put down whenever their next available time is, then look up the lyrics

-stede calling him a nut again i literally

-UGH the CONFLICT you can see on stede's face when deciding whether or not to remove the fabric covering ed's head or not. does he want to remove the fabric so he can say one final goodbye, face to face? or does he want to leave the fabric on so his last image of ed in his memory will be when he's alive and excited at the prospect of running away with stede?

-the fact that stede is literally pulling the wool from over ed's eyes and waking him back up both physically and spiritually(???)

-like ed, who was resigned to his fate and at peace with his choice to sink into the depths and never wake up again, INSTANTLY finds the motivation to live the SECOND stede interacts with him and he starts fighting as hard as he can to return to the surface, and just when he thinks he's not strong enough and he'll succumb to the darkness anyway, a light appears to pull him back from the brink. stede's voice comes through begging ed to wake up, to come back to him, don't die please don't die, he's here now. and ed's face as he's hearing stede talk to him is so full of love and amusement and admiration and then a little confusion as mermaid!stede appears but goes right back into his fully smitten expression and longing gaze and i just. don't know how we were ever expected to recover from this.

-THEY WERE ACTUALLY SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CRAZY TO JUST THROW THE GOD DAMN GENTLEBEARD/BLACKBONNET SEASON 1 BEST MOMENTS MONTAGE AT US LIKE THAT WITH NO WARNING DURING AN ALREADY EXTREMELY EMOTIONALLY TAXING SCENE

-anyway i am both irreparably broken inside and also reborn from this episode. thank you alyssa lane and alex sherman and also i will never forgive you for this

[esta-elavaris]

Top 5 fav scenes in pirates of the caribbean

The scene where James tells Will he's a filthy little blacksmith who needs to take a seat (this is the opposite of a Will Turner safe space - a danger zone, if u will), the scene where James mocks Jack, the scene where James--

No, I kid, uhhh, okay just because I'm aware of my biases I'm gonna have to separate James moments from overall POTC moments. Where ol' Norrington is concerned:

That scene in the first movie on the Dauntless where he climbs up onto the ship and fires that gun??? Rent free.

The bit where he first meets Jack and we get the "but you have heard of me" and he's just being a sarcastic bastard, especially where he puts on a big show of pretending to look for his ship. Also rent free.

"What have you got to lose?" "Nothing I'd lament being rid of." Iconic.

The look he gives Elizabeth when he realises she really hasn't worked out how Will ended up on the Dutchman.

"Come on then, who wants some? Form an orderly line and I'll have you all one by one." 😏 (Bc a friend I made through CTW send me that with "I volunteer as tribute!!" added and I ascended).

OKAY otherwise --

"You'd best start believing in ghost stories, Miss Turner, you're in one." Unreal. Especially "I'm curious -- after killing me, what's it you're planning on doing next?" Barbossa is a treasure, 90% of his lines are sheer gold.

The fight with Jack vs Barbossa at the end of the first movie where they're moving in and out of patches of moonlight, it's just so damn good.

Singing at the start of the third movie, easily one of the best movie openings at all time.

"And its Captain is to sail it as commanded." Beckett don't you dare make me like you bc what a bloody line.

The entire finale of the first movie, barring the part where our boi gets his heart broken (but honestly he's such a good egg about it, I love how they handled that - I'm so glad they didn't make him into a 2D gross "hurrdurr but she's mine" arsehole, and I think they did his character a bit of a disservice by cutting out the scene where he tries to make sure Elizabeth accepted bc she wants to).

I know I'm only supposed to have five, but Elizabeth's speech at the end of the third one and the music during that, What Shall We Die For -- so good. The soundtrack deserves a whole section of its own, it's all on my writing playlist, the Davy Jones theme is god tier, and I See Dead People In Boats literally makes my chest hurt, but mostly bc I listened to it while writing the Dutchman balcony scene.

Honourable mention to any time Jack negotiates with anybody, and Johnny Depp's sheer skill at acting as Jack in the first three movies (bc there are only three, don't you know?), where you can see just how much of the dumbassery is a façade so people underestimate him and what he's up to, because there are just these moments where he gets this gleam in his eye and you realise how much is going on behind the act and it's so, so good and complex and I stan.

[kimium]

Since I had so much fun writing out my ships for Twisted Wonderland I figured I'm going to do the same with Bleach. Because I spent my weekend rereading the last arc. And I've been a fan of the series since day one and I've never talked about it???

So, uh... here we go. Spoilers for the entire series... sort of. I mean... only one of my ships is from the final arc.

Rest is under the cut

Ships that are my OTP/ "They're basically canon in my eyes"

Kyoraku/Ukitake: They have such strong "old gay uncle" energy together and I love it. They're 100% in love in my eyes.

Ikkaku/Yumichika: They're so obviously a couple that it hurts me. Their dynamic! Their trust! Their loyalty towards one another! Top Tier.

Ships that I Really Like (in order of "I strongly ship this" to "I love the possibilities of this dynamic")

Grimmjow/Ichigo: They have that "enemies to sort of allies to begrudgingly accepting one another to dumbasses in love". At least as far as I'm concerned.

Byakuya/Renji: I'm a big sucker for the stoic one who has a soft spot for certain people falling for the wild, loose, passionate one who is a dumbass. Also that one scene in the Soul Society arc where Renji is just waltzing around the Sixth Division wearing a sakura yukata?? Top Tier.

Ulquiorra/Orihime: Yeah, I know he kidnapped her but they have this "beast who suddenly understands human emotions a little because one (1) person decided they're not taking this BS".

Ishida/Chad: I like this because it's Ishida "I over think a lot of things" and Chad "I see things for what they really are". I like that dynamic and think it's cute.

Komamura/Tosen: LISTEN. The moment I found out (all those years ago) they became friends because Tosen doesn't see the barriers Komamura has believed/been told about his entire life, I was sold. That's such a beautiful start to a friendship and it definitely makes me sad that Tosen betrayed Soul Society.

Kensei/Shuhei: I'm just a big fan of "I looked up to you and respected you and now that you're back and I'm an adult my admiration has been exposed as a crush. HELP, what do I do???" vibe.

Ships that I think are fun (in order of "That Definitely happened at least Once" to "That's interesting")

Urahara/Yoruichi: I refuse to believe they didn't experiment with one another at least once. Whether there are actual romantic feelings is up to interpretation.

Yoruichi/Soi Fong: Basically the same idea as Urahara/Yoruichi except Soi Fong is Definitely in Love with Yoruichi. It's cute.

Aizen/Hirako: I've flip flopped on this ship a lot over the years. While I'm not always a fan of it what I AM a fan of is the possibility that Aizen figured out he had a Massive Gay Crush on Hirako and then proceeded to be Extremely Conflicted over it. I just love imagining Aizen with all his little schemes crying in his room because "Captain Hirako is my enemy but he's So Hot I want to Sleep with Him".

Bazz-B/Jugram "Jugo": Look, it's my obligatory "THEY WERE CHILDHOOD FRIENDS" ship. Makes what happens in the manga all the more heartbreaking for me.

Gin/Matsumoto: Another ship that I've flip flopped over the years. I do think there is potential, especially their backstory. I also like the tragic angle this ship can take. But even if I'm not shipping it I do think their interactions/friendship is fascinating.

Gin/Izuru: I'm a huge fan of Gin causing troubles for Izuru and Izuru trying to be responsible for his captain. Then, Gin teases him and Izuru is a Flustered Mess.

Ships that I think are Cute (in order of "That's just sweet" to "I see the appeal")

Hitsugaya/Momo: It's just another case of "they're childhood friends that have a soft, cute dynamic". It's harmless and wholesome in my eyes.

Orihime/Tatsuki: They're just very adorable together and I've always enjoyed their friendship.

Renji/Rukia: I know it's canon but I'm not the biggest fan of it. That being said, I do think they're very cute and their shared backstory makes this pairing cute.

Ships that are just Crack/Make me Laugh

Kenpachi/Byakuya: If I had a nickel every time those two were paired up in a fight against the enemy I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's strange that it's happened twice. Or however that quote goes. This ship is all about "prim, proper one" with "not prim and proper one". I think it's funny.

Szayelaporro/Renji: Their fight was Charged. That's all I'm saying about it.

But what about any OT3s?

Shuhei/Matsumoto/Izuru: I love their dynamic. It's funny and cute. Matsumoto 100% is in charge.

Ichigo/Rukia/Renji: I just think they're Neat and I like the energy they bring to the table.

Ichigo/Byakuya/Renji: Almost didn't add this but then I thought of the chaotic energy Byakuya would have with BOTH Ichigo and Renji and laughed. So this is at the end as an honourable mention.

[onigiri-dorkk]

hiii :D coming from THAT twitter argument and saw your tweet/tumblr url about it "Mikasa being Levi's right-hand" omggggg I never knew I needed this so bad???????????? is there a fic list rec or smth where Mikasa is Levi's right-hand, doesn't have to be a ship fic idc I just need them being best duo in the world. are there fics where they fuck shit up together? often i see armin being levi's and hange's right-hand in fics but I want Mikasaaa

Omg YES! I’m glad you read that post! That twt argument was a mess but I’m glad it led you here 😭😂

Hell yeah Mikasa is his righthand. It’s interesting they don’t show much of it after the Season 3 Uprising arc/Crystal Caves, but it’s absolutely implied and makes sense. Mikasa’s the girl worth a hundred soldiers—as time goes on, she’s worth even more as she grows and nurtured that skill. Of COURSE this rare, once-in-a-lifetime soldier would end up accompanying the Captain of the Scouts in combat and off-field. We saw it during the uprising arc in full display, entering the battlefield together first before the rest of the crew, Mikasa helping him with the hands-on work of capturing people directly, even that moment when Mikasa speaks up for Levi and asks Armin and gang to trust Levi’s leadership when they doubted him/saw him as a bad leader for asking them to kill humans.

They went from not trusting each other (Mikasa doubting Levi’s intentions and leadership, and Levi wary of Mikasa’s tunnel vision over Eren) to having the fullest trust in each other’s skills/competency, to being the equivalent of Kenny/Caven (a captain and his righthand strong soldier), to heading into the battle of Heaven and Earth together where not only does Levi trust Mikasa with the final blow (whereas he is usually the one in that position), but he aids her the exact same way she aided him in the forest w Female Titan long ago. There’s just so much transformation and development between Levi and Mikasa (platonic) that it personally INSULTS ME when people say there’s nothing between them or imply they don’t even notice each other!

She has functioned as his righthand in his small squad for YEARS now. When mutual respect and admiration grows and nurtures for years, throw on surviving so many dire battles together, add on an exclusive understanding of each other as Ackermans burdened by their strength, of course an irreplaceable bond forms.

ANYWAYYYYY! Fic recs!!

I think I have some fun longfic suggestions for you! Everything I read is ship-related so hopefully that is okay for you!

My top rec is The Song Remains the Same by @moraleewright! A majority of this one takes place in the Underground where Levi and Mikasa venture off to solve a mystery. Packed full of adventure, angst, top tier romance and smut, gripping mystery, exciting action, plot twists, great original characters, all the things. I’ve been meaning to reread this one for the 4th time 😂 Mora’s writing style is to be praised every time. Her other fics are fantastic too!

The next is Determination by @chaosisbeauty23! I admit I haven’t gotten to finish this one yet (😭) but it is a full retelling of canon that is Rivamika-centered, so looots of adventure and action and moments reframed to circle around the two. Chaos is fantastic and a writing machine, she has so many stories and all so diverse!

The next is self promo (🤭) of my Microcosmos fic. Mikasa and Levi head back to Marley undercover to retrieve Eren after he goes missing. I wrote this with the top desire of seeing them as a soldier duo (obviously with romance budding) and I had FUN writing a lot of their action scenes and Marley adventures and all. The first three chapters are slower paced than the rest but I’m very proud of where things go, who they meet, how things unravel, and how they save and help each other throughout it, growing individually and together because of this journey.

I realize a lot of what I’ve read so far is post-war so not a ton of badass Ackerman action, but I’ll try to think more of other stories that are kinda action-duo based during their time as active soldiers. I’m thankful we have a lot of Rivamika fics even if we’re tiny in number 👏🏽

Thanks for the ask! My inbox is always open!

[staqua]

todobaku fic recs - #1

There are some amazing todobaku fics out there; here are some which have inspired me and which I love to bits (ft. me fangirling over them oops):

The indelicacies of nitroglycerin by yeetbz - This fic has my whole heart. It’s one of the first tdbk fics I’ve ever read, and it’s absolutely amazing! Features a pining Shouto who attempts to get closer to Bakugou. The relationship development is really well done, and it’s got some light angst as well, which makes it the perfect balance of emotions :) 

How to Talk to a Guy You Like: 14 Steps With Pictures by Callipsul - This is one of the funniest tdbk fics I’ve read, courtesy of Shouto’s texting random kaomojis to an exasperated Bakugou. Here, Shouto tries to ask Bakugou out to prom with the help of Wikihow...

Sweet Dreams After Halloween by arcsandblah - Demon!Shouto and elf!Katsuki keep crossing paths, despite them being in different worlds connected by a portal (that Shouto keeps crossing...). The world-building and atmosphere the author creates is such a lovely vibe, and it’s such a heartwarming story gah. Also features Eri as a baby reindeer! 

Captain Kacchan and the Ballad of the Bad Dancer by discokonomi - HILARIOUS! Such an underrated fic, but it’s an absolute gem ahh, Shouto does this disco cardio class with Mina as the instructor while Bakugou plays bloodthirsty ballads to children nearby (who adore him). Eventually, they take notice of each other, and it goes uphill from there :) The wordplay in this is amazing, and the writing is just so so good!

An Apple A Day by CloversDreams - Prince!Shouto meets apple farmer Bakugou who has an apple orchard, along with a dragon. This fic... is so heartwarming. The atmosphere is just so soft, and it features kirikami as dragons, whose interactions makes your heart go fuzzy. 

somewhere only we know by brioche - I love modern, canon tdbk fics, but there’s something so quaint about past lives, especially those fantasy aus. This fic does such an incredible job of intertwining their regular life with snippets of their past ones, which gives off a sense of yearning for times long gone (but clearly not forgotten). The author also has so many other great tdbk fics, so check them out!!

sakura blossoms (and love blooms) by todobaku brainrot hours (snowandfire) - Alright, this author has this incredible ability to just keep writing tdbk at a rapid fire pace which I’m so impressed by every time, but! This fic is one of my favourites. There is so much depth that is explored in their relationship, and it’s amazingly written. The attention to detail to the little moments, as well as the bigger picture (reciprocation of saying ‘I love you,’ or, the lack of) is just. Fantastic. Go check out their other fics too! 

just wanna tell you that you’re pretty, girl by guerdon - The main ship is momojirou, but it does feature tdbk as chaotic wingmen which is hilarious. The pining, fluff, comedy, and writing is top-tier, and it was just such a blast to read! 

There are so many other lovely tdbk fics, so I might do another fic rec list in the future :) For now, hopefully you all enjoy the serotonin!

[soft-october-night]

The Love Interests in the Works of Jane Austen: An Assessment

This is an "extremely scientific" and "thoroughly researched" ranking based on personality, money, family and connections, and is a bit of a blend between the book characterizations and the film characterizations (and is in no way only based on my own opinions). Here we go, grouped by book but not much else.

Edmund Bertram: absolute trash. His family has treated you unbelievably shitty since day one and not only has he BARELY noticed, he ALSO has treated you shitty. Will fall in love with someone beautiful and fun and when she dumps him will come crawling to you for a rebound. His passion for you is so lackluster that even the esteemed author who wrote about it barely spared a paragraph on your relationship. Has a job but only because his dad owns the land the church is built on. You’ll gain no connections or family by marrying him, since he’s literally your cousin.  0/10

Henry Crawford: There IS such thing as too much fun, and that is never clearer than in this man, who will try to seduce you as a game, freak out when his middling overtures don’t work and then try and seduce you “for really real” this time. You will definitely move up in the world if you marry him, and if you play your cards right it seems like his sister is also just REALLY into you, so see how that goes. Life will be pretty okay until you find him in bed with one (or more, who knows) of your relations. 3/10, 8/10 if you’re into that

John Willoughby: Will be like something out of a romance novel, you’re thinking he’s going to propose and then he just fucking ghosts you and embarrasses the fuck out of you at a party by acting like he doesn’t know you. Somehow marry him (congrats on the inheritance you must have, btw) and get ready to take a backseat to the whims of his aunt for as long as she lives. 1/10, at least you get to live in a nice house.

Edward Ferrars: Oh Edward. He’s a bit of a mess, isn’t he? Super kind, your family loves him, he made a bunch of stupid decisions in his youth that are coming back to bite him in the ass. He is loyal to an absolute fault, but you luck out when his fiance turns out to be a bit of a gold digger and dumps him when his mom disowns him. He doesn’t have a job and neither do you, but his family doesn’t wanna speak to him (lucky you!) and you’ll be happy and poor together if you two can work on your communication skills. 7/10.

Colonel Brandon: He’s got a nice house, the respect of his friends and the community, and he has a LOT of passion. He’ll give your sister’s penniless husband a job, dramatically rescue you from a rainstorm, make sure his dead girlfriend’s daughter is happy and taken care of even after your ex fucks HER over too, and is all around a pretty decent guy. Just. Uh. Maybe, kinda, sorta, needs to go after women his own age and is probably with you because you remind him of his dead girlfriend. 5/10 with the wildly inappropriate age gap, 9/10 without it.

Mr. Wickham: Please don’t. He’s a thirsty bitch who lives for drama and you think he’s fun until you find out he tried to sleep with one teenage girl and is making eyes at your fifteen year old sister behind your back. Marry him (through the grace of mysterious benefactors, cause he ain’t marrying anyone unless he’s paid the right price) and get ready for a life of being surrounded by military men in the north of England while your husband tries to fuck everything that moves. Work that out somehow with him and you might actually be happy. 0/10.

Mr. Bingley: He is a softboi who will do literally anything his friends tell him to do. He is SUPER rich, and marrying him will throw your sister’s into the path of other rich men and he is REALLY into you, but get ready to be sucking up to his sisters for literally the rest of your life. Unless he can ship Miss Bingley off to live with Mrs. Hurst, have fun trying to wage a war of barely concealed insults over the breakfast table every morning, and if you’re marrying Bingley I’m sorry but that is a war you just cannot win. He doesn’t have a job but he does have five thousand a year, and neither of you can manage money. You’ll love simply and deeply and be happy as any two can be. 8/10.

Mr. Collins: Last resort to rescue yourself from a life of being a burden to your parents until they die and then having to become a governess or something. Has a job but never shuts up about his boss. You will have to rearrange everything in your house according to his boss’ will. 2/10

Mr. Darcy: Is a anxious disaster who doesn’t know how to talk to girls at parties and needs to learn how say no to going out when he’s just not feeling it. He doesn’t have a job because he’s a landlord; he owns half of Derbyshire and has ten thousand a year, but turns out that all of that money and land can’t buy tact or charisma. Doesn’t know how to flirt and thinks he’s doing a great job (he’s not). He’ll propose to you out of the fucking blue one day by insulting literally everything about you, but don’t worry! Reading his letter unlocks Darcy 2.0. This patched version gives him humility, a personality, and he WILL gain the ability to rescue your family from utter ruin. Marry him and enjoy a life of luxury and witty ripostes, but beware! You ARE going to have to deal with Lady Catherine until the day she dies, not to mention Caroline Bingley’s barely concealed contempt every time you meet in polite company. Darcy 1.0 3/10, Darcy 2.0 8/10.

Captain Wentworth: Absolutely top tier. Has a job, has earned everything he has, including a fortune and the respect of his peers, superiors, and subordinates. His sister and her husband are practically the only happily older married couple you know, his friends are super fun and nice (even the dour one with all the poetry knows how to have a polite conversation). If you dumped him ten years ago on the advice of your almost comically shitty family yeah, he’s going to hold a grudge, but he WILL NEVER STOP LOVING YOU and the MOMENT he gets over his pride will do everything and anything in his power (including leaping the bounds of propriety!) to win you back. Based on his love, money, and connections you should RUN, not walk, into his arms TODAY and allow him to rescue you from your family and whisk you off to see the world on his ship, at least until Napoleon busts out of Elba. 12/10

Mr. Eliot: Will lose all your old schoolfriend’s husband’s money in a bad deal, has debts out the ass, might be trying to get with either you or the woman your dad has been flirting with for the last few years, you’re not sure. Is totally ruining the rekindling relationship you’re trying to get going with your far superior ex. He wants the land and title your dad has and will stop at nothing to get it. Marry him and you can move back into your old house (maybe? it’s a little unclear what with all the debts) but have every single cent your mother left you immediately put into some dumbass scheme. 1/10

Henry Tilney: another softboi who just wants to act in the school play while his dad and brother plan to ship him off to military school and berate him for not joining the football team. Bring him shopping with you to pick out dresses, spend long nights over tea chatting about books. Has a job, but again, only because his dad owns the land the church is on. Loves you even though you have some very strange ideas about his house, and will forgive you when he realizes you thought his dad either murdered or imprisoned his mom. If he can find the courage to tell his dad to fuck off and let him live his own life, expect a long, happy marriage of snuggling together in a window seat somewhere, sipping tea and reading. 9/10

John Thorpe: Trash bastard man. Peaked in whatever equivalent of high school he had. Shitty and rude to everyone, would post racist memes on facebook and start fights if he could, all while being shitty and manipulative and CREEPILY possessive of you. -2/10

Robert Martin: A sweet himbo farmer who just wants to love and worship you. He has a job, is pretty rich, and while his connections may not be above his class, he’s an earnest boy who wants to take care of you and be taken care of in turn. Marry him the first time, absolutely do NOT let your friend influence you against him, because who KNOWS if you will get a second proposal! (You will, he likes you THAT much.) Marry him and enjoy a sweet, simple life of exactly zero drama (unless your friend is around). 7/10

Mr. Elton: Trifling gold digging trash who doesn’t know what the word no means. Do not marry, unless you want to be censured by decent, hardworking people -1/10

Frank Churchill: Knows how to have fun, but you know there’s something more going on. He won’t let you see his letters, he sends out secret notes, then he smiles and tells you that everything is totally a okay. Another boy with ANOTHER overbearing aunt, only this one doesn’t know how to say no. Marry him if you’ve got the money, but he will always be longing after the poor girl next door that auntie wouldn’t let him married, and would have cheated on you already if she was into it. 3/10

Mr. Knightly: He’s your brother in law and you’ve known him almost your whole life, so that’s a little sus, but he is also the ONLY person in your entire life who knows how to tell you no (and you really, REALLY need to be told no sometimes.) He is extremely wealthy, but more importantly he’s kind and caring about people who are considered “beneath” him. He will break his weird no dancing rule to dance with your shy friend, he will ream you out for being shitty to unwed spinsters who value your opinion, and somehow has the correct read on everyone all the time. You will gain no connections by marrying him, since the two of you already have the exact same connections anyway, but the two of you should be content in a test of wills that will last a lifetime. You’ll be very happy as long as he doesn’t get super pedantic and start correcting you about everything. 7/10

[magnetic-rose]

Why Spones is a top-tier ship

AKA “the inherent homoeroticism of annoying the shit out of your co-worker.”

Spock and McCoy have a complicated relationship. A lot of their bickering and ideological differences lead fans to believe that they hate each other, but that’s an over-simplification of the truth. The reality is that Spock and McCoy are extremely close friends who care about each other deeply. Though sometimes their bickering turns serious during stressful situations, for the most time they seem to enjoy the banter. A common mischaracterization of their relationship seems to put McCoy as the bully and Spock as the victim. In truth, there are many times where Spock will say something specifically to get a rise out of McCoy. They fight. That’s how they show affection, not disdain. In fact, one could argue that some of their bantering have a flirtatious tone to it.

Kirk: Mister Spock, regaining eyesight would be an emotional experience for most. You, I assume, felt nothing.

Spock: On the contrary Captain. I had a very strong reaction. My first sight was the face of Doctor McCoy bending over me.

McCoy: ‘Tis a pity brief blindness didn’t increase your appreciation for beauty, Spock. (Operation -- Annihilate!)

Spock is a half-Vulcan, half-Human who has mostly chosen to follow his Vulcan heritage. As such, he is a being of almost pure logic. The truth about Vulcans are that they are secretly beings who feel things very deeply and intensely, and they feel the need to keep a tight lid on their emotions as to not succumb to them. McCoy, on the other hand, is a regular human. He’s a deeply emotional man who cares about others. One could argue that McCoy is almost too empathetic, as he lets his emotions rule him. Spock and McCoy are polar opposites; the brain and the heart, the logic and the emotion, the super-ego and the id.

Despite these differences, the two men are similar in a lot of ways. They’re both men of science, men of peace, and they both care very deeply for their Captain. They’re both self-sacrificing morons, to the chagrin of the other. Spock will prioritize McCoy’s life even when both of them know it’s not the logical choice to do so. Likewise, McCoy will take a hit for Spock even when they both know the Vulcan is stronger and better equipped to deal with pain than the doctor.

Spock: (In the middle of a blizzard) In this severe cold, we cannot survive much longer.

McCoy: Leave me here, Spock.

Spock: We go together or not at all.

McCoy: Don’t be a fool. My hands and face are frostbitten. I can’t feel my feet. Alone, you have a chance. Now do what I say. Go try to find Jim.

Spock: We go together! (All of Yesterdays)

In the episode, “The Empath,” Kirk, Spock and McCoy have to choose someone to be offered as sacrifice to be tortured by a group of aliens. Kirk obviously volunteers, but gets put to sleep by McCoy with a tranquilizer. Spock then states that he’ll offer himself up, as he has the higher chance of surviving the torture. McCoy then proceeds to sedate Spock as well, and sacrifices himself to be tortured by the aliens.

Spock: While the captain is asleep, I am in command. When the Vians return, I shall go with them.

McCoy: You mean, if I hadn't given him that shot

Spock: Precisely. The choice would have been the captain's. Now it is mine.

(McCoy turns away. Spock sits to carry on working. Gem puts her hand on Spock's shoulder, and smiles. McCoy comes up behind him and gives him an injection.)

Spock: Your action is highly unethical. My decision stands. (Spock falls asleep next to Kirk.)

McCoy: Not this time, Spock.

Underneath all the fighting and disagreements, there is a deep caring between Spock and McCoy that manifests itself into protectiveness towards each other. In “All of Yesterdays,” Spock is constantly showing concern for McCoy after he almost died of hypothermia. In aftermath of McCoy’s torture in “The Empath,” Spock is seen hovering over his body and caressing his face, worry written into his features. On the other hand, while McCoy constantly makes fun of Spock for his lack of emotions, he’s also highly aware of the Vulcan’s mental state and protective of it when others threaten to shatter his resilience.

McCoy: He's a Vulcan. You can't force emotion out of him.

Philana: You must be joking, Doctor.

McCoy: You'll destroy him.

Parmen: We can't let him die laughing, can we?

McCoy: (Watching as Spock starts to cry) I beg you! (Plato’s Stepchildren)

The episode “Amok Time” also demonstrates McCoy’s perceptiveness of Spock and Spock’s true feelings of friendship towards McCoy. McCoy is in fact the first person to notice that something is wrong with Spock:

McCoy: Oh, captain. Got a minute? It's Spock. Have you noticed anything strange about him?

Kirk: No, nothing in particular. Why ?

McCoy: Well, it's nothing I can pinpoint without an examination, but he's become increasingly restive. If he were not a Vulcan, I'd almost say nervous. And for another thing, he's avoiding food. I checked and he hasn't eaten at all in three days.

Kirk: That just sounds like Mister Spock in one of his contemplative phases.

Kirk doesn’t notice anything wrong with Spock, and initially dismisses McCoy’s concern, but McCoy immediately picked up on Spock’s mental turmoil. Despite his cantankerousness, McCoy not only cares about Spock but goes out of his way to look out for his mental state. Part of it might be because he’s his doctor, but how many doctors go so far as to monitor someone’s eating habits because they notice that person’s suddenly being fidgety? On Spock’s end, when it comes time for him to beam down to Vulcan to complete his marriage ceremony, he specifically asks for McCoy to be there:

Spock: By tradition, the male is accompanied by his closest friends.

Kirk: Thank you, Mister Spock.

Spock: I also request McCoy accompany me.

McCoy: I shall be honoured, sir.

One episode I find extremely fascinating in terms of McCoy/Spock moments is “Mirror, Mirror.” In this famous episode, half of the Enterprise crew get transported into an alternate universe dubbed The Mirror Verse, in which evil versions of the characters exist and terrorize space as a fearsome military force. McCoy is part of the team that gets transported in the Mirror Verse, while Spock stays in their regular universe. Mirror Spock immediately realizes that half of the crew, including Kirk and McCoy, are acting strangely. When he corners Kirk to question him, he does so by threatening McCoy: “I shall not waste time with you. You’re too inflexible, too disciplined, once you’ve made up your mind. But Doctor McCoy has a plenitude of human weaknesses, sentimental, soft. You may not tell me what I want to know, but he will.” This Spock seems to have a intimate knowledge of McCoy’s mind.  When the party decides to attack Mirror Spock, he fights all of them except for Uhura and McCoy, who he simply pushes out of harm’s way.

When Mirror Spock gets hurt as the crew is trying to escape back to their own universe, McCoy is suddenly unable to leave his side. Kirk allows him to stay to nurse Spock back to health, and McCoy risks almost staying in the Mirror Verse forever for him. When Mirror Spock awakes, he backs McCoy into a wall and initiates a forced mind meld onto the doctor. The next scene has Mirror Spock holding a disoriented McCoy up and bringing him back to his crew; he now understands what is happening and he wants his regular crew back, and thus he allows Kirk and company to make the switch back to their own universe.

Other Star Trek properties have gone more in depth on how a forced mind meld can be extremely traumatizing on the person receiving it. Star Trek: Enterprise has an entire story arc dedicated to the Vulcan T’Pol trying to heal from a forced mind meld. Unfortunately, because the nature of TOS episodes were episodic, we never got the chance to explore the emotional fallout of McCoy’s forced mind meld and how that might have affected his relationship with Spock. The franchise also never went in depth on Mirror McCoy outside of what Mirror Spock speaks of him, since Mirror McCoy died of xenopolycythemia in 2269.

Closing the list of evidence of Spock and McCoy’s affections towards each other are the Star Trek movies “The Wrath of Khan” and “The Search for Spock.” Towards the end of Wrath of Khan, Spock sacrifices himself to save The Enterprise in one of the franchises most heart-wrenching scenes. Moments before his sacrifice, he knocks McCoy unconscious, touches his face and whispers “remember.” What happened in this scene was that Spock, knowing he was about to die, transferred his Katra to McCoy. The katra being the Vulcan equivalent of a soul. This speaks to the amount of trust that Spock has in McCoy. For someone who keeps most of his emotions under a tight lid, it’s a huge gesture to entrust another with the essence of their entire being. The next movie, The Search for Spock, is a journey as the Enterprise crew fight to return to Vulcan so they can reunite Spock with his body. When they finally arrive, the Vulcans warn McCoy that the process is extremely dangerous and could even result in his death. McCoy calmly replies that he “chooses the danger.” He cannot fathom living his life without Spock.

McCoy: (Speaking to Spock) I'm going to tell you something that I... I never thought I'd hear myself say...But it seems I've missed you. I don't know if I could stand to lose you again.

So in conclusion, Spock and McCoy have a rich and complex relationship that is much more than simply just “they dislike each other because they bicker a lot.” Their bickering is more akin to that of an old married couple. There are plenty of examples not even included in this post of how deeply they care for each other. Despite their ideological differences, they balance each other out quite nicely. McCoy is finely attuned to Spock’s emotions, arguably better than anyone else on the ship. Spock in turn is protective and gentle with McCoy. Once you stop looking at their interactions solely on the surface level, you’ll be able to see the tenderness and years of love and friendship between them. This is why I think Spock/McCoy is one of the most underrated and misunderstood relationships of TOS. Don’t let the constant arguing fool you into believing these two dummies don’t adore each other.

Shout-out to Tempest for their extremely lengthy ship manifesto on Spones called “Spiced Peaches,” which goes even more in depth on why Spones is a great couple. Using their manifesto as a reference was key to remembering Spock/McCoy moments. Also shout-out to the site chakoteya for having full transcripts of TOS episodes, so I could easily find quotes for this. If you’ve come this far, thanks for reading!

[gale-gentlepenguin]

im sure you've been asked this before but what are ur top 5 episodes

My top 5 favorite episodes?

Well I did do a top 10 list a bit after season 3 hit. But I think I can update that list now. 

This isn't rated on objective goodness, but overall personal enjoyment.

5. Evillustrator

At one point this was my favorite episode of all time. And I still do think it is one of the best episodes of season 1.

But comparing it with other episodes that come out, and that I am viewing objectively, it needed to get bumped down a bit.

I still think this is peak Akuma design. It also has one of the more creative battles on the list. And of course, the Marichat is top tier.

Evillustrator was the first akuma that really demonstrated complexity (and is still one of the most fascinating akumas in the series.

The problem is that they never build on it and Nathaniel’s characterization goes from interesting to non-existent to Jerk to Pandering.

I still go to this episode to cheer me up and remind me of the good times

4. DarkOwl

Having revisited this episode. I can't help but just love it more. It is the best written episode of season 2. It takes someone that was considered a joke and made him the closest akuma to taking down the two heroes. (thats right.) Truth is, I didn't even watch this when it first came out, I had taken a break from the fandom. When I came back and was trying to catch up did I actually SEE this episode. And honestly, if I had seen THIS episode after Captain Hardrock. It might have brought me back into ML earlier.

The set up for the akuma is also pretty fun to watch, especially when it wasn't even malicious. Ladybug and Chat noir wanted to help Mr.Damocles be a hero so he would stop getting hurt.

Of course the internet got involved and mocked him VICIOUSLY. Like I felt legitimately bad for this principal. You can't even really be mad for him WANTING to do good. Its a cliché premise but its executed better then most.

Dark Owl’s design is not as cool or scary as I would like, but it is still pretty good, and when he almost gets the Ladybug miraculous a SECOND TIME. Its interesting.

3. Gang of Secrets

(Spoilers for Season 4 episode 3)

I expected not to like this episode. It has so many things I am not crazy about. Rehashed akumas, Misunderstandings, the cliché friend break up/ make up, and the weight of the world on one’s shoulder’s bit. 

I was wrong. The Gang of secrets (the 5 akuma group) were amazingly done. They were coordinated, they had a solid reason for akumatization, they also had such solid chemistry that it made their antics amazing. I Loved watching the fight against them.

Ladybug’s manic state was not played too corny or too subdued. It really made the viewer understand her emotions. Her emotional moment at the theater was something else. This was one of the few times the writers showed just as much as they told. Even without the rant, we could feel Ladybug’s state of mind. We want her to have something to help her ease into things.

This episode also did a lot to correct the issues with season 3 Alya, and I am glad to see it. This was the Alya from Sapotis that Ladybug trusted. Alya breaking free from akumatization (while being akumatized) was so RAW, it was such a good scene and I loved it.

Alya finding out Marinette is Ladybug.

A LOT of people are not fans of that. And I get it. I do.

Some of you wanted Chat noir to find out first. (which I understand because I did as well. Because ‘Us Against the world’. Totally understand. And also Lovesquare stans and shipping goggles)

Some of you wanted Luka to find out first. (It made no canon sense however ya want to twist it. but hey, shipping goggles am I right? Cant say I blame ya.)

Some of you even wanted present Alix (Which I actually was surprised to hear, but it made a lot of sense considering future alix)

I can understand some of the criticism lobbed at this episode. But honestly, watching the series as a whole makes this whole bit make more sense. We do forget that Alya knew marinette longer then Chat noir and Luka.) Alya had helped Marinette in so many ways. Even as the ladyblogger, Alya is someone Marinette trusts and I think thats important. This ALSO causes a lot of potential drama down the road which I will look forward to seeing.

2. Oblivio

It shows Adrien and Marinette at their core, they fall in love in like 10 minutes, and their banter is adorable.

It was a high stakes episode, the only drab thing was the akuma’s design was boring. But it still did a LOT.

Yes, I am shipping trash. But season 4 actually helped me appreciate this episode even more. Its the episode that helped me stick season 3 out till the end. It reminded me WHY I loved the love square so much.

If you need a reminder of WHY Adrien and Marinette are wonderful together. I highly recommend it.

1.Origins Part 2

Umbrella scene

[tundrainafrica]

So I see your a LeviHan shipper!! I enjoy the ship a lot too!! But are there any specific reason that their your favorite?? Maybe you could explain that a little through a list? But anyways I hope your week has been good so far, Sav. Have a good day/night!!!! - Signed by Your Secret Santa 🎄

Hello! Thank you for asking about my week (and my ship). 

I enjoy the ship a lot too!! But are there any specific reason that their your favorite? 

To answer that first question...

You’re in for a long rollercoaster ride of a rant because I don’t think I’m the type of person to ship anything to the point of writing domestic fluff fics unless the I felt really really drawn to the ship. 

Anyway, (slight) spoilers abound! Will keep manga spoilers subtle, mostly Levihan scenes.

Disclaimer: I do not want to start shipping wars. I specifically avoided the words like should or best because I recognize that shipping is generally based on preferences. I respect everyone’s preferences on what they want out of a ship or even a relationship and through this, I just hope to express my own preferences and maybe even gush with people who agree.

1. The ship did not move the plot. The plot moved the ship.

Attack on Titan is not a romance or a shojo, if it’s not fairly obvious from any chapter you would randomly read. As a reader, I would have expected it to fall short with pairings. Most shows which are not romance based tend to have a few pairings which just suddenly end up together towards the end of the manga because “What’s a happy ending without marriage and kids?” There is usually a trend of just pairing of the extras and sometimes, or maybe even more often than not, it just seems to come out of nowhere (ehem... Naruto.). Maybe the relationship worked off screen but I dunno. Like no shipping war here but the only pairing I had full support for was Shikatema. 

In stories classified as romances, there is enough of a spotlight on the sexual tension and mutual pining of specific characters for the romance to be considered reasonable. In my opinion, some authors tend to sacrifice really good world building for a good romance. Objectively twilight for example had some crazy good world building but it just kinda focused a little too much on emo Bella and emo Edward for the world building to actually be appreciated by the casual reader. Tbh though, this is not necessarily bad because people get into stuff for reasons, sometimes, I just wanna read a good fantasy, sometimes I just wanna read a good romance.

Romances though as a main driving point for narratives, require some convenient serendipity moments and sexual tension which can be written well but as a reader, I prefer to see more natural relationships born out of necessity (Wall of Winnipeg and Me by Mariana Zapata is a good example of what I’m talking about in a romance novel.)

Attack on Titan through its narrative actually made Levihan seem VERY VERY possible. If I had to compare the presentation of this ship in canon to at least one relationship in other anime, I would compare it to Royai from FMA. 

Like, if Attack on Titan didn’t give us random subtle hints about romantic or just platonic relationships between the two or even about anyone, even if Levi and Hange did get together in the end, it would have been one of the pairings, I probably wouldn’t have raised an eyebrow at. 

But they could be just friends? Which brings me to my next point.

2. Their current situation makes it so it’s only natural that at the least, they considered it. 

Yes. Friends is a valid interpretation for anything. I mean, given our hook up culture, people can fuck as friends too. People probably have made out drunk as friends too. Like I have seen my fair share of this type of bullshit in high school and college and I would say, we do not need a kiss or a fucking session to recognize that something can be a good relationship or to recognize that they have probably thought about it. 

A relationship requires a commitment (conscious or unconscious) to caring for the other, keeping the other safe, recognizing their flaws and thinking about them regularly (Call me scott peck or marriage counselor but like I honestly think the world would be a better place once people recognize that quality romantic relationships are worked for).

Mind you, Levi and Hange lost everything.They literally lost everything from their old life, all their friends, all their loved ones and all they have is each other and they’re forced to take care of a bunch of kids.

There are people who have said before, no one gets very close with someone without ever considering a romantic relationship with them. Or even if they never considered it romantic, they could consider at least “living with them their whole life,” or “supporting them through thick and thin.” The things is, towards the end, they were constantly together and what drove them to that situation is that both of them are aware of what the other had lost. They understood each other more than anyone else and they recognized that they were the only ones left in their own circle and I personally think that is more than enough for a relationship to naturally bloom between them.

3. The relationship and the signs are subtle and it works.

I personally probably would not have enjoyed it if canon showed a romantic relationship of the two after Erwin died. It’s a valid interpretation to consider that it could have happened, based on my explanation for number 2 but Hange is commander, Levi is captain. They have a professional relationship and they have goals and obligations which take precedence over personal desires. They are in the middle of a war and the most which probably could have happened was a secret mutual pining between the two and I think Isayama has injected the most subtle hints which are the most that could have been appropriately put into canon without seeming too OOC. Hange and Levi are not selfish people. They have promises, dreams and obligations which they respect and have committed themselves to already. It has also been shown at earlier points of the manga that they do put their survey corps duties on top of everything so acting on a romantic attraction at that point in time would have definitely been inappropriate. 

I personally think, the scenes of Hange going out of her way to save Levi as commander, killing her other soldiers to save both their asses, suggesting in the forest that they live together instead of go back to the war and not leaving an injured Levi until she had no choice were more powerful than a lot of romantic scenes where people actually fuck and kiss. Kissing and fucking are easy. Leaving the duties and responsibilities they have worked for for five years to keep the person they love alive hits way harder. 

Call it platonic. Call it romantic. But no one like Hange would have deserted her post as commander for a few chapters to take care of a sick comrade and kill her subordinates to save their asses if there wasn’t anything between them. 

4. It gives a great example what healthy relationships can come from. 

I grew up reading sweet valley and chick lits cause I was a basic bitch and I kinda grew up with a somehow unrealistic idea of where relationships come from. Call me a late bloomer but I only actually figured out where the romance and the happiness of a relationship was when I got into one with my best friend for five years. 

It’s the sexual tension and the “will they wont they?” push and pull which can lead to satisfying sex or a happy ending in romance novels. I think in a way, media kinda overglorifies it which kinda gives a lot of young people the wrong idea about why they getting into a relationship is fun in the first place.  Because after the satisfying sex and the kids, what’s next for the relationship?

Years of utility bills, diapers, chores, schedules, parent teacher conferences and compromises until someone gives up or dies. And what kind of relationships can actually thrive through all these? 

Those that have mastered the underrated parts of relationships. These include conflict resolutions, compromises and open communication. I think we have seen enough of those two, even before season 3 that have shown that they know each other very well and they have shown to at least have a relatively equal power dynamic which is a foundation for open communication and mutual trust in relationships even beyond the fucking and marriage stage 

5. They have a great foundation of character development for both parties.

As I mentioned above, they have a relatively equal power dynamic. I love Royai from FMA and I have compared Royai to this multiple times. I would say though I prefer Levihan over Royai because I felt that Royai had more unequal power dynamics? (Though I still think Royai is a top tier ship ). Also, they have shown to tell off the other when they don’t like what the other is doing. They are complete opposites but here is the magical thing. They talk everything out. They’re generally open people to each other and they know each other way too well as hinted in scenes before and opposites work as long as the others are willing to compromise. I think (especially in season 3 and season 4) that they have done enough for each other and have compromised enough for each other in the survey corps that these skills could easily be brought with them even after the war.

That open communication is just what makes them maintaining a relationship while being complete opposites very OC and realistic. Eventually, they did probably did make compromises, which most likely softened or moderated the crazy parts of their personalities which is just a really fun part of their relationship to explore. 

6. It could realistically last so maybe ...

7. A good foundation for happy children?

Maybe it’s how it is written because of the actual story and why would Yams write a romantic drama in a story about genocide and war. Tbh, I would attribute it more to Levi and Hange’s personalities though because Mikasa and Eren have their fair share of drama, mostly one sided though coz Mikasa. This relationship has no drama, no misunderstandings which just further supports my point that they have a relationship that thrives on open communication and mutual trust. Drama is fun like when we’re the ones on the sidelines eating the popcorn but I have third wheeled enough people in my life to realize that I will not support a relationship where both parties are just not ready to be mature about it, in real life and in fiction. 

My favorite couples, in real life and in fiction, are definitely those who keep conflict among themselves and maybe among trusted people. I think one sign of a healthy relationship is one where problems don’t become public through social media or through like 20 people. One important yet underrated part of relationships is the atmosphere of comfort and freedom which encourages both parties to be able to directly approach one another before tensions and uncertainties get out of hand.  

And a life free of dramas at least in the early stages of life just kinda shows at least that both parties are ready to bring a new life to the world? Because like immature parents with shitty conflict resolution skills really fuck kids up man and I passionately believe the world would really be a better place if babies were born out of trust, mutual understanding and open communication instead of sex but yeah, make sex fun to keep our race alive.

So anyway, I guess, I just finished explaining why I love this ship so much while also disclosing my preferences for relationships. 

As mentioned above...

Disclaimer: I do not want to start shipping wars. I specifically avoided the words like should or best because I recognize that shipping is generally based on preferences. I respect everyone’s preferences on what they want out of a ship or even a relationship and through this, I just hope to express my own preferences and maybe even gush with people who agree.

Other pairings which I support for those curious: Shikatema, Royai, Victuuri, Percabeth etc.

Also... To answer your second question... 

My week has been great, some pretty solid life developments but US elections wise, not so great... (WHY IS THE ELECTION RACE SO CLOSE?)

[cringeyvanillamilk]

002 with Gordon? 👉👈🥺

Your wish is my command~!

How I feel about this character: Oh man, I absolutely love Gordon. The moment I saw him, I knew I was going to enjoy his character a lot. His visuals screams goth, but his heart whispers rainbows. Every scene he's in, I'm either gushing over his friendship speeches or feeling pity towards my boi when he gets done dirty! Gordon honestly deserves more attention and love!!

All the people I ship romantically with this character: I've mentioned this before, but I absolutely love the idea of Mereoleona and Gordon being together. They radiate loud jock x quiet goth energy. I feel like they can provide something to the table that the other lacks. I also find them to be a cute and quirky ship. This is more like a crack ship if anything, but I will still die with this ship. Another character I potentially ship romantically with Gordon is Gauche. Maybe it was when they bonded over books when trying to find a cure to Asta's arms. Or maybe it's just how perfectly weird they are together. Gauche would obviously be the tsundere of the pair while Gordon is the goth sunshine.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: The weird triad: Gauche x Gordon x Grey. The triple G's. The three weirdos. The quirky XDs. They have many names, but this is the true golden trio of Black Clover. Their interactions with each other is just so hilariously awkward. They each have such contrasting energy that somehow it compliments one another. We need more of this trio pls!

My unpopular opinion about this character: Idk if I have any unpopular opinions tbh. I guess one unpopular opinion would be that he should've trained with the others at the Heart kingdom. Or that he has the potential to be a top tier fighter if only he was given the chance to grow. Also Gordon should be the next Black Bull's captain or vice captain if possible.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I wish Gordon had more of a prominent role during the water temple arc. I feel like they sacrificed potential character development from Gordon just for a gag. It makes him an outlier within the squad which contradicts the arc's theme of teamwork and hope! They deadass left Gordon to despair by himself smh!!!

My OTP: What can I say? I love Mereoleona x Gordon. lmao

My cross over ship: This is an interesting, but difficult topic! Screw it, I'll just go all out. Final Fantasy VII's Cloud x Gordon. May these socially awkward dorks work it out with the power of friendship. Another potential crossover ship could be Kimetsu no Yaiba's Shinobu x Gordon. Both wield poison and I feel like they'd make a cute pair actually-! Shinobu can't roast a pure sunshine like Gordon. She'll fall for his charm, I'm sure of it. No one is going to bully Gordon when she's around. Trust.

A headcanon fact: Gordon writes fanfiction about him and the squad.

[vexredain]

5. Mercurial

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Vashti Āl Hubasha - Thavnair - Seventh Astral Era

Thavnair had always felt crowded; whether bazaar, village, or dock, their island flowed with life as much as it did with coin. Perhaps that was the reason Eorzea had taken on a comfortable presence in her mind, or perhaps that was a mere association of happier memories. The estate there, while in various states of disrepair, had a homeliness to it that her ‘home’ did not. Hubasha may have been a small port, growing in scale and prestige as each cycle marched inevitably on, though she’d never felt an affinity to it as her kin claimed to.

Even now, as a duo of black-red garbed guards passed, chain veils hiding all their scorn but that they held in their eyes. She paid no heed, passing them in the hallway, and thanking the Braves that the vibrant passage was wide enough to allow them to pass without trying to walk through her. Great doors of painted wood parted then, revealing the yawning space of Hubasha’s main hall, itself part administrative building and part estate for the family. or at least, those of the main branch. The square hall a mixture of colourful panes of clay, spiralling pillars of intricate patterned stone, fabric curtains drawn open to make the space even larger, revealing the gardens beyond that led  to the family’s personal moorings. Seating was either atop cushioned benches, or for those of lesser status, simply cushions on the floor, sandstone covered by rugs of all makes that could be found across Thavnair, and even some of Dalmascan make among them. The ceiling a great dome, open at the top, for now, allowing the sunlight to flow unfettered upon the crowd below. 

Most of the invited guests had already arrived, the hall home to a varied collection of Miqo’te, a smattering of Hyur, the odd Au Ra, and even a Matanga or two. Their presence, a testament to their family’s sway in the home they’d grown and bore as namesake. The volume of such a room filled with voices was a clamour, the subject, unsaid. As her ears perked to catch the voices of those in the middle of the open square, it was, of course, another debate over the pains of governance and those of taxation. If she recognised the Arkasodora stood in a vibrant green sari well enough, it would not be over quickly. Across from the gargantuan woman, three seats arranged on a tiered stage. The largest of the three a throne, of sorts, and upon which, her opponent. Which should have been the Hubasha’s head, though he, Nassir, was nowhere to be seen; in his place, a small Miqo’te child sat. Her heritage as mixed as the room, and a silent prayer upon the lips of many that thankfully, her mother hadn’t bothered to show herself today, choosing to sulk in her chambers, or better yet, aboard her ship moored a pleasantly far distance away.

Of course, the half-Keeper child wouldn’t be speaking here, that was for her aunt, a black-veiled guard captain at her side; Najah. A distant relative of her own, as most were in this gathering in some fashion, whether by marriage or blood, such an audience was a limited affair. Nassir’s audiences were always held by those two, child and captain, and the secret to his absence was part unspoken secret, and one that sat waiting upon the lips of most here, she’d think. Illness had taken a man so burdened by age and strife that he’d barely been able to name a successor, and so their problems began, as though there weren’t already enough to name against them, now. Even Eirah, a competitor, had known the truth, and so she questioned the purpose of hiding such, though she’d not voice that, as violet eyes caught Najah swinging that mace in a flourish, pointing it toward the Arkasodora in an accusatory threat. She’d almost interpreted it as one toward her, as though the woman knew her very thoughts. 

The mercurial nature of family politics would ever remain a mystery, and one that she was thankful to never have to navigate. A rare moment of enjoying the reprieve granted by a life lived with only the expectation of service. 

By the Braves, it felt crowded. 

[not-close-to-straight]

Hey NCTS! I just discovered your blog and admire your essays expressing your love for your ships. I recently got into the Stuckony ot3 and I have to say, I'm having trouble like appreciating? the Stucky aspect to this pairing. I don't know if it's just the past shippers that made me dislike Steve and Bucky, but could you, if it's possible, express your view on that ship and why so many people love it and defend it like Stony? I'd appreciate someone to widen my perspective ♡

I could write for actual days on all the achingly beautiful reasons why Stucky is a top tier pairing but honestly for me, it all comes down to this:

Pick a popular fairytale or romance novel trope. Got it? Congratulations, it perfectly applies to Stucky.

Sleeping Beauty. Which one do you want sleeping and rescued, is it Steve sleeping in the ice who never feels whole or like he's found his home until after Bucky comes back into his life, or is it Bucky who "slept" in Hydra's hold for seventy years and is literally brought back to consciousness and coherence and life by Steve whispering a line from their childhood.

Beauty and the Beast. Is it Bucky who is ugly and hidden and damaged and Steve who breaks through the mess of Hydra and brainwashing and brings light to his life by way of gentle humour and sharing meals and quick touches, or is it Steve who is so lost behind his Captain Persona that only Bucky cracks through and makes him human?

Is it Rapunzel where Bucky is trapped in the metaphorical tower of Winter Soldier conditioning and Steve literally scales walls, blows holes in walls, drops planes from the sky and takes on the entire world to reach him.

What about any story with soulmates across time and space. Star crossed lovers. Reincarnation aus. It's literally canon for Stucky. They knew and loved each other in one version of life (pre serum and pre war) met again and loved each other again in another version (post serum and during the war) then met and loved each other again Again AGAIN post CATWS, post CACW, post EG. Bucky's got a star on his shoulder that matches the star on Steve's shield like it's a soulmark. "Till the end of the line" is literally "till death do us part" which is a wedding vow.

What's your favorite theme in love stories? Is it unconditional acceptance of each other, because Steve and Bucky have loved each other back when they were poor and Steve nearly died, they loved each other during the war, they loved each other regardless of the brain washing and PTSD and pain.

Is your favorite theme Body Worship? Cos you can't tell me that Bucky didn't love skinny Steve so so much and then love Beefy Steve so so much and that Steve didn't cry the first night he was able to see the damage Hydra had done to Bucky and Bucky cringed away but Steve wrestled him back and proceeded to kiss every mark and scar and ruin and whisper how beautiful Bucky was again.

Amnesia AU? That ones actually canon cos Bucky didn't remember Steve and then DID remember Steve. Friends to Lovers? Just cos we didn't see them kiss on screen doesn't mean it didn't happen. "There was only one bed?" they were POOR of course there was only one bed!

The thing is-- pretty much whichever story trope or romance genre or fairy tale Au you tack on to them, Stucky fulfills it BEAUTIFULLY and to me as a writer, thats a pretty amazing thing.

ALSO (holy shit, I am going to ramble for days about this)

ALSO Up until Endgame butchered all of Steve's character development and yeeted him backwards to hang out with Peggy--

Literally right up until that moment, you can watch every moment of Steve/Bucky interaction in the MCU as a romance story without even having to squint for it. In fact, if you swap either Bucky or Steve out for a woman, it IS a romance story.

Hear me out:

Childhood friends since kinder school and when Stephanies mom dies, Bucky follows her home, tells her to come home with him, that he can look out for her, that she doesn't have to do it alone, that he's here for her until the very end. Bucky pulls her out of a bad situation in an alley and when she is visibly upset about him shipping out to war he pulls her close and promises her a really great night, they can go out celebrating together and it will be just fine. At the date, they fight because she wants to join up and help the war effort and he tries to talk her out of it before finally giving up and begging her not to do anything crazy while he's gone. They part with a smile but visibly upset to anyone who happens to look. Fast forward a little bit and she hears Bucky's in trouble. She quits her job, steals some stuff, connects with some mildly sketchy individuals to break every single rule and put her own life in danger to rescue Bucky and then when they are sharing a drink later and celebrating him being alive, she asks if he'll stay and he says 'i'd follow the pretty girl from brooklyn anywhere" Fast forward a little bit and Bucky gets hurt, falls from the train and disappears and in her grief and determination to END this whole thing that took the love of her life away, Stephanie crashes a plane into the arctic, saving the world but willingly killing herself because she has nothing to live for anymore... until literally decades later when just hearing Bucky's NAME is enough to jar her concentration to the point of accidentally allowing people to die in Lagos and then a short while after, abandoning her job, her work, her alliances and running all over the world taking on law enforcement just for the chance to find Bucky again before finally going into hiding in an attempt to keep Bucky safe.

That's not platonic. Not by any stretch of the imagination. But that's Stucky's MCU story. Sprinkle in a few "i tried to move on from you by kissing this person but couldn't" and a healthy dose of 'its hard to find someone with shared life experience" and a smidge of "even when I had nothing, I had him" WHICH STEVE ACTUALLY LITERALY SAID and you've got a love story.

But moving on to why I love Stucky specifically within Stuckony (I'm sorry, I said I wasn't going to ramble but HERE WE ARE ANYWAY)

Stuckony only works if the Stucky relationship is well developed and stable and that applies whether Stucky is together in the Stuckony or if they're just friends but both are with Tony (Stony/Winteriron). Because polyamory ONLY WORKS if all the partners involved are all on the same page.

So Stucky is great for all the above listed reasons, and then if you take that super strong relationship and apply it to HEALTHY polyamory with no room for jealousy or other icky dynamics, you get this really beautiful picture of two men who already love and understand each other unconditionally and get to watch them navigate the changing relationship with a third that they also love and are trying to understand. And you get to see Tony who is madly spoiled by both Steve and Bucky together and individually and then you get to see Tony diving into two AMAZING relationships where whenever there's a hiccup, Stucky goes to each other and is like "help me figure out how to treat Tony the way he deserves" and then they go do it TOGETHER.

Basically, Stuckony gives us a chance to watch the pieces of polyamory (Stucky, Stony, Winteriron) be really beautiful relationships by themselves, and then blend together into something BETTER and honestly, who doesn't want that?

One of my favorite Stuckony fics that I've ever written and the one that I think highlights that ^^ dynamic the best (without being hundreds of thousands of words lmaoooo) is called "It's Our Pleasure" and I highly recommend it for about a thousand reasons, but mostly because the story really highlights Stucky's relationship as it changes to include Tony and it wouldn't be HALF as great a story without their scenes.

Fair Warning, the Story is Dom/sub but only in like, the MOST vanilla of ways. And also it's a little angsty with hurt!Tony typical angst and also Steve knocks the shit outta a few people for disrespecting the men he loves but hey, we actually love to see that with him, right?

Cheers!

[formless-monkeys]

What is your favorite relationship(s) in the show (romantically or platonically, doesn’t matter!)

Anon you will regret opening pandora’s box. Or not. In any case, this post is going to be very long because I’m full of love. Also, anything marked romantic does not need to be romantic for me to lose my shit over them. In no particular order, either. Just in the order I thought of them.

1. The Black-eyed trio

Characters: Otto, Sparx, and Gibson.

Type: Platonic, Romantic,

Explanation: These three are grouped together by virtue of not being obscenely powerful and serving more practical uses on the team. Also, their eyes are all the same color. Besides the poetic connections of the colors of their design, they were alone in the robot together while the other three monkeys were out training.

Sparx and Gibson’s interactions give me life, going from playful jabs to genuine fighting right back to ride-or-die is amazing. The beginning of Night Of Fear, the battles in Brothers In Arms, and a bunch of small moments throughout the series are wonderful for this.

I could write an essay about Otto and Gibson, and someone else already has, but I’ll summarize it as ADHD autism solidarity with a side of Shut The Fuck Up Gibson. They care about each other and learn to respect each other in a way that’s better for both of them. I know a real-life Gibson to my Otto and learning that she’s just pretentious and doesn’t really hate anyone, and figuring out that we’re both equally brilliant and incredibly similar has made life a million times better.

Otto and Sparx don’t have as much development as Gibson with both of them, but their jokes together and general trust is amazing. Sparx is the dumb monkey and Otto supports him in his himbo endeavors. 

These three together make an unstoppable technical team, and the only reason they probably couldn’t be a superhero team on their own is because of the raw power and fun dynamics brought by the other half of the team. 

Romantically, these three would make the DUMBEST polycule ever. There is no true mediator here. It’s three dumbasses figuring out how they could possibly share a twin-sized bed when they have the ability to just make a bigger bed. Gibson calculates the most efficient 3 monkey makeout and none of them follow the statistics. They all give Chiro equally useless and conflicting advice on homework. Trying to give them a mediator in the polycule just makes me go back to shipping polymonkeys because I literally can’t decide if Antauri or Nova go better with them.

2. Quiet trust and encouragement

Characters: Otto, Antauri

Type: Platonic, Romantic

Explanation: When Otto is being dismissed by the other monkeys, or by the show itself, Antauri is usually the first to say “that’s bullshit, Otto is wonderful”. Circus Of Ooze is a notable example, but there are little moments in other seasons as well. 

I just love the idea of the historically MOST SERIOUS and strongest monkey, sometimes even elevated to god-like status by some fanworks... paired with the monkey that has been infantilized and disrespected to no end. I personally like making Antauri have to lean on Otto, just to subvert that even further. 

Beyond spite, I ship this simply because I like their dynamic. Antauri needs someone to ground him with more tactile physical things, and Otto needs someone to share his more nebulous thoughts I can’t imagine the others listening to. I love them.

Also, I want Antauri to unlock his true dumbass potential. He has the abilities, but not the will. Be silly with Otto. I want to hear him snort-laugh.

I literally forgot all the silver monkey stuff but I got three fics about that you know I go nuts over mechanic x robot shit.

3. The monkeys and their human son.

Characters: Chiro, Antauri, Nova, Sparx, Gibson, Otto

Type: Familial

Explanation: This family gives me joy. They were forced together through astronomical means and they made the best of it. 

Everyone living in the robot is absolutely fucked up. They help each other in the darkest of times. They lift each other up when it’s light. They are a perfect team and nobody can be missing without it feeling wrong. But they can add people!

“Girl Trouble” as a concept is AMAZING to me but my secondhand embarrassment is so strong that I hate the episode. But never once is any of the monkeys resentful of Chiro. Not even Mandarin is like “wow I wish he didn’t take my place” no he’s also struck with the urge to nurture this kid to his fullest potential. Whether you see the team as a bunch of older siblings or 4 dads and a mom doesn’t really matter, they’re a family.

I mean, this also has a sprinkling of shipping all the monkeys in a really domestic way because I like seeing my optimal future in characters I like, but like literally all of these, it doesn’t need to be romantic for me to go nuts. I just think it would be fun to throw just a big monkey wedding or whatever. And funnier for Antauri to go “Chiro I’m having a baby. The baby is you” and holding up adoption papers because on the principle of Toby “Radiation” Fox I love that joke, especially when made much less weird than the original context.

I have a set of characters who is just 5 people in a polycule raising kids and living life because I really love this concept as a family.

4. Evil Coworkers

Characters: Mandarin, Sakko

Type: Romantic, Platonic,

Explanation: Why the hell are these two, in particular, working together? SK could’ve put Mandarin with literally anybody else and he chose what on the surface appears to be the LEAST compatible person on the account that they’re both monkeys. Some bitter asshole who now looks like the epitome of toxic masculinity and this tiny pink pet who used his femininity both as an advantage and a style. They’re different but it ends up working really well for both of them because they’re different in ways that cover each other’s bases. It’s wonderful. Pink and Orange go well together. Green and Purple go well together. Mandarin and Sakko go well together. Also, they clearly trust each other. During almost the entirety of “Hidden Fortress” Sakko was presumably just chilling inside of Mandarin’s armor. Mandarin trusted him enough to have Sakko in a place where he’s able to mess with his cybernetics, and Sakko trusted Mandarin enough to go into the battlefield with him and probably get tossed around.

If they were both human and in a more modern media, then they would definitely be shipped in the straightest way you can get without actually being straight. The Straightest Gay Ship. 

5. A Witch and her Accidental Evil Coworker

Characters: Skelemandarin, Valeena.

Type: Platonic, Romantic, 

Explanation: These two have been through some shit. Skelemandy was made to serve Skeleton King only to have that purpose yanked away from him. Valeena was groomed to idolize and serve Skeleton King for nearly her entire life. They were forced together by SHEER CHANCE and they both hated it. Arguably they both died at some point. 

They both have absolutely NOBODY they can trust so let’s make them trust each other. All hilarity and sweetness comes from that. 

Their dynamic is so good that I have them on a blog for a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FANDOM and people love them with no context. 

This is the only cross-species ship I have (besides chinmay and the antauri ships but that doesn’t count), but the fact that Skelemandy isn’t actually a monkey and needs no cybernetic assistance to be human-level sentient makes it a lot less weird. Just put them on equal ground power-wise (like by nerfing Valeena’s magic) and you have the ingredients for bonding. 

They have like, no cute moments in canon, but that’s why we have fics and art. They have potential. I want them to help each other figure out who they are without their purpose. I want them to survive this horrible life together. I want them to figure out how to trust again. I want a lot but Valeena is fucking dead.

But she doesn’t have to be.

(Also Valeena is REALLY HOT and Skelemandarin is just me as a monkey)

6. Gay Dads

Characters: The Alchemist, Captain Shuggazoom

Type: Romantic, Platonic

Explanation: Oh my stars. Oh null. Oh me oh my hhougfhfakjghf. These two have the angst of Mantauri but on crack. 

They only appeared in about two episodes each and all three episodes are top tier. They call each other “Friend” multiple times in their shared episode. THEY’RE FRIENDS!!!!!!!!! The face Al makes when he realizes that Cap is visiting makes me really happy. The fact that Cap had this whole Batman Double Life thing and he shows the Alchemist BOTH OF THEM is amazing. The alchemist is a hermit living in the woods and he lets Cap into that life. 

There isn’t a lot shown, much less than everything else here. But that makes every single fanfic so much richer since they’re almost completely based on headcanons. Friends who have a mutual crush on each other but are No Homo about it? Secret boyfriends? Husbands with 6 monkey kids? An Old man and a grumpy Skeleton making it work? Literally just platonic friends? Dude, you can do whatever you want. 

The tragedy of these two losing each other to one big horrible event crushes me. It influences my every move in my creative work. I have an entire character dedicated to reuniting these two in the most astronomical and ridiculous way possible because the alchemist angered the gods but she thinks he needs some company in his eternal punishment.

I want Clayton to unlock Al’s less serious, more fun side. I want them to work together. I want them to hold hands. GHGHGHDFBG UTTHTYE CNAZSNT EBCV ASUA ER

7. The girl power duo

Characters: Nova, Jinmay

Type: Familial

Explanation: These two were my only comfort during the uncomfortable nightmare that is “The Hills Have Five”

Nova was the one who trained Jinmay, and it seems like they hang out a lot offscreen in season 4. They fulfill the early 2000′s cartoon archetypes of girl and Girl, so they’re supposed to get along. If they didn’t I probably wouldn’t like Jinmay.

Nova is a really good big sister/parental figure to Jinmay, who never had any family to speak of. 

Anyway, this entry has to be shorter because most of their bonding is in “The Hills Have Five” which is either #1 or #2 in my least favorite episode list. Not because it’s bad, but because it makes me viscerally uncomfortable. I really wish literally any other character than Jinmay was in her role in that episode. Or that the “taken to an offscreen area by an adult man while she screams” just wasn’t there. SHE’S 13!!! Nova did literally all she could to help. 

I really like that scene in questionable where Valeena kills almost the entire gang. It’s what they deserve.

Look I just really like Jinmay and I always have. She deserves a good Mom.

8. "My Second In Command”

Characters: Antauri, Mandarin

Type: Theoretical

Explanation: The fandom has really made this ship go from “literally nothing to stand on” to “integral plot point in a lot of fics”. Seriously. I have TWO screenshots that vaguely imply these two ever stood next to each other on the battlefield. This was entirely title-based and fan-made until ProjectAfectivity interviewed Ciro. Yeah he knows Antauri but only as well as the rest of the team. Anyway. Wow. This ship.

This is by far the worst breakup in history. These two, despite what Antauri says, were on equal ground at some point. According to Ciro (and fan speculation), they trained together. This (and other Mandy ship) changes wildly depending on if you think Mandarin was corrupted by the portal or not. Maybe Mandarin was once a kind leader who just crossed the wrong boundaries and paid for it. He could’ve held Antauri gently before battle. He could’ve been the monkey Antauri went to when he needed someone to talk to. He could’ve hyped the team up like Chiro does.

Or maybe, they were constantly fighting against each other in small ways. An incredibly unhealthy relationship, yes, but an interesting story. I like stories where Antauri isn’t this all-knowing pillar of stability. He’s got weaknesses. One of them may have been Mandarin.

Now that’s a good nickname from one to the other.

Imagine Antauri, in a moment of complete trust, declaring Mandarin his weakness. A sweet sentiment. They both know the other is incredibly strong, and trust that the other would never take advantage of that connection. They love each other. Until...

9. "My Closest Ally”

Characters: Otto, Mandarin

Type: Theoretical

Explanation: Okay I'm looking at the screenshot I put for this entry while also having watched Evil Ages recently. My brain is making uncomfortable connections. Combine that with the fandom and the show’s general treatment of Otto and I’m about to slam my head into a wall. I really do not like that, but I feel like there’s somebody out there who does. 

Anyway, this is Gibotto and Ottauri but with all the spice that shipping Mandarin with one of the other monkeys brings. When done well, it’s all the respecting Otto that comes with Ottauri and all the intimate partnership of Gibotto. And the Angst of Mantauri, but a lot more grounded. 

It paints a lot of stories. A story of a single point of comfort in a world Mandarin thinks is out to get him. A story of powerful validation from the one authority in Otto’s life. Of letting your guard down. Of trust, then breaking that trust.

I’d LOVE to see some things with Mandottotauri because that’s epic and cool and poggers. Don’t see a lot, though.

10.The Hets, I guess.

Characters: Jinmay, Chiro. 

Type: Romantic. Platonic. Canon.

Explanation: Look two entries on this list are polyamorous and four of them are mandarin so I have to say SOMETHING for the heteroes following me. Picked this ship over Spova because when I was a young child still suffering from comphet, I never watched the last episode of the show. I only saw up to season 3 at the most. This was the only canon ship for me. And out of all the ships, it’s the most relatable. I’m currently a teenager with black hair who looks really good in eyeliner dating a girl with pink hair who can pick me up and is unbelievably sweet. Except we’re gay and polyam. Wait a second I totally had a crush on Jinmay as a kid and now my gf is the Jinmay in this situation. Oh my god I was going to make this comparison if I did Spova too and I liked Nova.

ANYWAY

These are two LONELY kids. Chiro had bullies during school, and now he doesn’t even go to school. Jinmay hasn’t really had friends at all. Two kids with places in their universe that they aren’t too sure about, and just need someone to lean on. Their date was cute. They instantly bonded over their love of monkeys and I love that. 

The super robot is sometimes an analog for Chiro, in the first two season at least, and the way the super robot held Jinmay’s hands to keep her steady on the COB while her head flew in was SO SWEET. Chiro’s instant recognition and reaction to Jinmay’s head being thrown at the team, as well. He really loves her.

I think it’d be interesting if she didn’t love him back, though. I might take a stab at writing that.