#open thoughts

[yuckiemouth]

ouuuu you know the stroke game is goodt !!! 😩😩😩

[nyneroxx]

I don’t know who I am anymore

But I’m going to find out

Relearning and evolving is what life’s all about

Breaking and healing to expose my new layers

Humanity and understanding becoming my new pillars

Stripping away the smoke screen created by societal lies

Finally I can look myself in the eyes

-NyneRoxx

[lola-x]

today i haven't engaged in my morning ritual.

12.22.24.

today i am forcing myself not to open instagram because i know if i do i will check to see if you still follow me.

i hyper-fixate on the number of followers i have. not because i care if someone unfollows me; but because i care if you unfollow me.

"you can't be serious."

"whattttttt," i groaned.

"for a girl who's chronically online, you really seem to hate my posts."

i rolled my eyes, "i like this oneeee." i handed him my phone.

"yeah; shirt off, abs out, bicep flexed."

i flopped backwards onto my bed, covering my face, giggling.

he handed me back my phone; the heart now red.

in an act of desperation, i type in your instagram handle.

close one.

update: i did just check your instagram but for the purposes of this post... and it's not the morning! plus i wanted to see that picture again. oops!

[canesthoughts]

I pray to Saint Anthony when I can remember, to retrieve what is dear to me that I misplace in burning embers

And overtime

I look at my hands, the hands that once welcomed

the few the many, three was never a crowd.

My eyes water, I blink, surely nothing has changed, these hands, the same hands are chard indistinguishable leaving no trace

That’s not completely true,

At the root it’s still bone

Though my kind hands, these same hands

Nevermore

So now my chin is down and my palms facing away I saunter towards rose petal lies of inocent times I call better days

Behind me is a chard path like the first footsteps on a snowfall that starts the winter

Realizing that ice and char are not so far apart

I remember my light as I wane

My shadow grabs me and keeps me as long as I’m willing

Misery loves company

Here I stand miserable and unwilling

[khimerah]

Every black womans face, new or old, needs to be painted on a canvas.

I need a current number of all black women here today to start this project and to have them painted through sessions in a day after day. I wonder how long it would take to complete? I think, I believe it can be done. We’re like 8 months into the year so we’re kinda lagging WAY behind. 😬 Sorry about that folks 😬 but I believe if we had every black artist in the world to do this at the same agreed upon time.

GUYS can you help me brainstorm this? Like it doesn’t matter the reality of it, just help figure this out. We could make this happen!

[euphoricdr3ams]

If I learned anything this year it’s to be ok with just meh. If I can get to a point where I wake up each day with just meh then that’s progress for me. We’re not there yet but maybe one day it will or won’t come. I genuinely don’t know.

[magnificentlybeauty]

Exquisite energy is such an essential component of our daily lives that takes , An unfortunately constantly Affect by how much energy we spend on things that are actually not worth spending time on .

[r3dsaturntv]

Open Thoughts with Liv Morgan - YouTube

[sharkboybake]

The new episode is up my sharks !

[somethingdarkandbeautiful]

something..03 02 2025

i was tryna play this color game on my phone and havin hard ahh time //

found out they got a color blind mode today, been acin through that shit ★✦🙂‍↕️

[yuckiemouth]

curious what you think each member likes to hear in bed from their girl! Like words, phrases, things that really get them going, whether they like their girl to moan, be loud… etc

1. Jungwon

idk why, but Jungwon’s the type to anticipate any reaction from you. A little moan or sudden movement can get him going especially since I’m a firm believer he’s the smallest member. It doesn’t even have to be words, just a little squeal can make him ask “you like that?” “Is that good?” And continue to do the same movement every time.

2. Heeseung

He loves a moaner. He likes to hear how good he makes his girl feel especially based off how conceited he seems. If his girl ever say “Right there!” “Don’t stop!” “That’s so good!”, I don’t think there’s no coming back from that. Another thing, mocking your moans.

Y/N: “That feels sooo good,” she says inna high pitched voice.

Heeseung: “Yeah, it feels good doesn’t it?” He mocks her tone.

3. Jay

Jay is a gentleman during sex IDC. When she hisses and swears under her breath, he leans in and loves it when she whimpers in his ear. “Make me cum.” “Right there, baby,” “I fucking love you,” he asks her if he should go faster because he’s going at a normal pace, but when he gets the pass, he goes all out on her til she’s satisfied.

4. Jake

An exaggerated yapper. For example.

Jake asked. “you like that?”

Y/N nodded vigorously. “I fucking love it, baby,”

You get what I mean? He likes a girl who tells him what she likes and what feels good. But let’s be real, he’s a yapper too with that damn accent. “Naur way, this feels so fucking good,”

5. Sunghoon

I feel like fucking with Sunghoon is dangerous because you’re gonna moan anyway. He’s rough IDC IDC LALALALALALA! When he goes all out, he likes a good grunt or yell from his girl. Obvious signs that it’s too pleasurably overwhelming is when she grips the sheets, bites her pillow, rolls her eyes, etc. “yes! Yes! Yes!” Chanting is another thing he likes.

6. Sunoo

Whimpering. That’s it. He doesn’t like nothing too loud or too low, a slight sob whimper would get him off. Part of me feels like he gets too scared to hurt a girl, so he’d wait til she says. “Mhm, keeping going,” “yes. That feels so good,”

7. Riki

Idc what y’all say, he’s the type to moan AFTER you! That doesn’t make sense ik, but think about it. Say he’s fingering you between his legs and he stares at your face while pounding your flesh. You held onto his forearm to slow down, but that just encourages him more. You moan a bit loud because it feels so good and then he DEEPLY moans in your ear, following a hiss.

He likes it when a girl moans, but he really focuses on the facial expression. He wants to physically SEE how great he’s doing, hearing it is good too, but seeing her with her mouth agape, eyes lost somewhere with furrowed eyebrows . Yeah, he’s coming alright.

[theintro-vertedstorm]

She is Law

I’ve been waiting for this move to be called

Tell me “don’t say a word” as you pin me to the wall

Stare at you, ur eyes say a bad day

So tell me to kneel and it’s going ur way

This here is no time to ramble

One wrong move and my body will shamble

But that’s what I want from you tonight

Release the dominance with all your might.

Follow you around, take ur love taps

Make me lick ur body, demand with a slap

Tell me “sit on this chair so I can sit on ur lap

And it better be hard, don’t give me soft crap”

I just want to please you, relax with joy

You’re the queen on this board, I’ll be ur good boy

My dreads, pull it, scratch on my body

And this is all night. I’m never leaving ur lobby.

[lola-x]

and he bent down and kissed me.

when I think of you now, it’s mostly good- on the surface at least. the memories we hold- that we share- are all in good faith in my head. it’s when i start to deeply analyze you, what you said, what you did… that i begin to question you as a person.

truly, i am becoming what frustrated me most about you. 

but maybe this is what we both needed. your wake up call consisted of books that hyper-analyzed my personality and somehow influenced your conclusion that "we aren't compatible." while hearing this absolutely crushed me, your words served as the best wake up call i could ask for.

as you pulled out your phone from your right front pocket preparing to read the words you had written- the words that you had sat with for some time. words that you decided were the perfect fit to tell me. i bit my tongue, pinched my hand, and stared down at your car floor preparing for impact. preparing for the last two months with the boy i had convinced myself that i would fall in love with to be ripped from my hands in an instant.

"my feelings have changed."

i closed my eyes as the faucet began to leak with no plumber in sight.

"i want you long term." and he bent down and kissed me. "red." "red." and he bent down and kissed me. "long term." "red." and he bent down and kissed me.

"sorry, i think i'm just rambling," he said.

"oh no. sorry. i'm listening." i turned to face him. his phone still in his hand. i opened my mouth to speak, but i couldn't muster the courage to say anything. or, rather, i didn't know what to say at all.

as the silence began, the distance between us grew. i wanted to run. to get out of his car and run into the street or into my car and drive to my home but he was my home but why did i make him my home? and, yet, a part of me wanted him to hold me. to tell me that it was going to be okay. that all of this was just a dream. that he was joking.

"so what changed?"

and so it began: the deepest, most intense feeling of hurt i've ever experienced in my life.

he said that he did a lot of thinking over break. that he spent a lot of time alone with his thoughts. he said he began to have conflicting opinions on our compatibility and that maybe i was too "bubbly" for his more soft-spoken personality. while yes, i may be portrayed as an extrovert, anyone who truly knows me knows i'm an introvert at heart. so maybe he didn't really know me at all.

"i mean you're so smart, and pretty, and well... you're perfect."

and there it was. the summary of my personality. the three words he felt that represented me the best. i was so perfect, and yet he was letting me go.

he then began explaining the books he read. books that consisted of a so called expert writer's analysis of my personality. how absurd is that? how could this man only describe my personality in three words after allegedly reading a book about it?

i nodded. "okay. thanks for being honest."

he nodded and began again, "i'm really sorry. i didn't want to hurt you."

the freshly painted red nail polish i had just applied for our date later that night slowly accumulated on his car floor. "hurt is inevitable."

he looked down. i could tell he didn't know how to respond.

to me, personalities can't be defined by words on a page. they're felt and experienced and can be reflected on, but not confined to paragraphs written by a stranger. a book can only say so much about our compatibility because a book doesn't know either of us.

"i'm really sorry. i just..."

"it's okay, really it is. you can't force connection."

"no it's..."

he began again. but this time revealing to me a new side of him that i hadn't quite seen before. or maybe i had, but never to this level. i mustn't reveal his specific thoughts, so i will keep it brief.

i could tell by the way he spoke about being scared to hurt others, the way in which the words so effortlessly flowed out of his mouth, that he is deeply broken. whether or not he realized that, he knew he couldn't drag me down with him, and i am forever grateful for this realization.

i think he's scared of hurting people, and i think it stems from his experience in previous relationships. going into us, i don't think he realized that he had this sentiment. i think he had fully believed that he was ready to open his heart up to someone new. and in his defense, he did. he told me things he didn't share with his friends. he talked about me with his family. he showed himself to me in ways only certain individuals have the privilege to. and for that, i am eternally grateful.

but hurt is inevitable. it's what you choose to do with that hurt that matters. hurt is a normal part to any relationship. it's a feeling that you must be with okay with accepting because it's how you decide to navigate, grow, and learn from that hurt that will dictate the longevity of your relationship. i don't think he's learned that yet. and that's okay.

a part of me wants to believe that there's no way he didn't think we were compatible. this is something i could write an essay on to be completely honest. the way in which he decided to pick a part my personality felt like the biggest heartbreak i'd ever experienced because what do you mean my personality can only be summarized by words you and a stranger deemed fit? my personality can't be confined to a series of words, and i refuse that to be my reality.

part of me thinks that his books were used as a means to provide me with concrete "evidence" as to why he didn't like me. maybe he thought that if he simply stated that his feelings about me had changed that i wouldn't believe him. but having the books as the evidence provided him something to fall back on if i interrogated his feelings- or lack there of. but i could never question that. you feel what you feel. and maybe he needed something to validate his feelings, and the books are what did it for him. but the fact that he needed to use a book to validate how he truly felt about me- instead of thinking back to how he felt when he was with me- tells me all i need to know about him.

"goodbye; i'll see you next year."

i couldn't bare to look at him. as my hand latched around the car door to open it, my mouth sealed shut. i couldn't even say anything to him. not even goodbye.

and he bent down and kissed me. "your eyes are so beautiful." "red." "but what if they see?" "i want you long term." and he bent down and kissed me. and he bent down. and he kissed me.

this moment felt like an eternity. my movements felt slow. like time had purposefully transformed its seconds into minutes. every memory, every text message, every conversation, every shared experience began flying out of their manila folders and scattered across every section of my brain. i finally got out of his car and began walking to my apartment.

as i shut the front door behind me, i almost turned around, but something stopped me. i don't know if it was embarrassment or shame or doubt. but whatever it was, i'm glad it did. i couldn't let him have more or me than i was willing to offer. which is ironic because just an hour before, i was almost certain i would have given up everything to be with him.

and he bent down and kissed me.

[canesthoughts]

it’s funny how long the sun is in the sky all day but as soon as it touches the horizon it’s gone in seconds

[euphoricdr3ams]

Soft people get nothing for their kindness but it is against their nature to be mean. So what’s the solution here ? For real