#or even trying to be

[furshrimps]

I'm actually thinking often about where the point would be when I should seriously think about rehoming my dogs. Currently I can still mostly care for them, albeit going for regular walks isn't quite possible. I'm still hoping my condition will get better again so I'll be able to do that again. So far we either have to make use of the property or my sister will help with that, since walks with me have to be few and far between and pretty short. Sister also helps with enrichment. That situation isn't ideal, though, all in all they get much less time outside the property than before, and I do feel bad about that. I also spend less overall time with grooming, but so far I can do at least the minimum amount of grooming.

I think it's a balance, especially considering the history of both of them, as well as their age (10 and 12 now). They've both went through things that left them with serious trauma of humans, and both have done a lot of recovering since they've came to me. I know it probably sounds like I'm trying to turn a blind eye on the situation, but I don't think I can be replaced for them that easily. It probably would be a tad bit easier for Sammy, despite him being older and despite him having had the "worse" objective history. But overall I think he's more stable and adaptable. I'm not sure how Bats would be able to cope, though. Finding good homes for them would be a nightmare, though. Even just finding someone to help with walks feels like a too-big task, at least I still can't think of a good way to find someone who is trustworthy and knowledgeable enough. I do admit I'm probably way too overprotective about the dogs and way too distrustful of human beings in general here, but there are so many idiots out there who intentionally or unintentionally could cause so much serious harm especially to such small dogs that I don't know how to even start on that. And thinking how Bats practically has to be forced to leave the apartment without me even just to go with my sister, whom he knows very well... idk. Sammy is kind of hesitant, too, but not quite to that extent. Once outside they do enjoy their walks just fine from what sis tells me. But with a complete stranger? Idk.

Currently, I think the point to think about rehoming for me would be when I either can't even take care of the rest of the basic day-to-day care anymore, or when they'd start getting unhappy. So far neither of these things seem to happen, at least Sammy seems to be just fine with whatever as long as he gets some play, some running around, food, affection and a generally safe place. Bats is more easily bored, because he needs a lot of encouragement for things outside of activities that don't include treats, and he rarely offers social play on his own. And because he'll just wait it out until someone notices it's easier to dismiss or not notice. But just asking him to do a few tricks here and there so he can earn some treats, and likewise a quiet/ safe/ harmonious environment with lots of affection seems to be enough for him overall. I have a feeling all that could be very different if they had been raised and lived their life in a "good" environment all of the time. With a dog without all the traumas I probably would already be thinking about rehoming, or starting to think about it soon. I mean, I AM considering and weighing it constantly just the same, but so far it appears to be not the right thing to do, despite the downsides for them. But from what they show the upsides seem to outweigh the downsides still. I do try very hard to keep my assessment objective, even though I can barely think about that without breaking my heart. But ultimately, I knew I would and could make the decision in their favor. I'm just lucky they appear to be fine with it so far, and I can't begin to describe how thankful I am for that.

Maybe other people have a different view on all that, and maybe I'm wrong. But I honestly do try my best to do the right thing, and to do right by them. And I also try to do what I can to get better, because I'm sure that is what we all want the most in the first place.

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[not-quitenormal]

Rage. In my heart. All-consuming. FUCK AI.

[captainjonnitkessler]

Sometimes I wish we would start calling out the performative radicalism on this site for the poser bullshit it is. "Remember, it's always morally correct to kill a cop!" "Don't forget to firebomb your local government office!" "Wow, it sure would be a shame if these instructions on how to make a molotov cocktail got spread around!"

Okay. But you're not killing cops or firebombing government offices. You are posting on a dying microblogging website to a carefully-curated echo chamber that has radicalized itself into thinking that taking the absolute most extreme position on any subject is praxis but that anyone discussing the most practical way to effect actual change is your sworn enemy. You do not have the street cred OR the activist cred to be talking about killing cops, babe.

[wildbasil]

things haven't been great but i think they will be. eventually 🌻🌼🩷

[bulkhummus]

first you have to remember that the first disco ball was painstakingly put together by hand from nothing but an idea and lots of intricately cut glass and bandaids and then you have to think about the experience of being under a disco ball for the very first time, bathed in reflections of an era that has not yet come to past, and finally you end up wondering what else there is around you that has yet to be unearthed by something with so much as a silly name

[mrtequilasunset]

Listen man, you guys can't be like "you guys need to be normal about asexuality" and then turn around and get weirdly judgemental when you find out someone doesn't have sex by choice. Like that's weird that some of you do that.

[stuckinapril]

Incredibly alarming that talks of “peace” in Gaza seem to extend no further than a ceasefire. How do you think they’re gonna start off where they left off themselves? Their houses are destroyed, so many have lost mothers and fathers and brothers and children, they still have no clean water and no food. Any area Israel withdraws out of is an area it already knows has been rendered inhospitable. There was even a direct quote by some IOF soldier gleefully stating how he “wasn’t sure Palestinians could go back to their homes.” So what happens when the US “succeeds at negotiating a ceasefire”? Who will be responsible for helping the Palestinians rebuild all that they’ve lost?

[zytes]

this manatee looks like it’s in a skyrim loading screen

[laughingcatwrites]

As a reminder that good exists out there, a coworker recently confessed to me that he found out his child is questioning their identity (kid's gender redacted for this post). The kid is keeping it from him, so he can't say anything to them or show that he knows, but he's doing his best to get mentally prepared and educated so that he'll be ready whenever his kid does feel comfortable enough come to him.

For context, this guy is a big, bulky middle aged dude who loves sports and typical outdoor "manly" activities. As his coworker and friend, I know he's a kind and sweet teddy bear of a person, but his kid probably views him as a stern, authoritarian figure, the way most teenagers view their parents. His family lives in a conservative area, so I'm sure between that, their dad's looks and interests, and the fact that their dad is a Figure of Authority, the kid is worried that they won't be accepted.

But you know what? When he found out about his kid, the first thing he did was reach out to his closest queer friend and ask for resources for parents of questioning children. His biggest fears are that his kid will be bullied or discriminated against and won't feel comfortable enough to be themself. His second action was to find himself a mentor in another parent who went the same situation (kid coming out in a conservative town). The other person is preparing him for some of the struggles his kid may face and the fights he may need to take on as a parent to make sure his kid is safe and treated well.

Something I want to emphasize for people focused on language as the primary method of allyship is that when we spoke, he used some outdated terms and thoughts about gender and sexuality. That does not make him bad. These were the terms and thinking used about questioning teenagers when he was growing up and he never needed to learn more current ones. But now that he does have that need, he's throwing himself in head first because that's his kid and he's darn well going to make sure that his kid feels welcomed and has a safe place to be themselves even if they never come out to him.

[casgirl]

people cosplaying on public transit are the backbone of our society and i am SO serious. there is no greater omen of good fortune than seeing hatsune miku on the bus.

[the-tired-commander]

hey could y'all do me a favour?

Reblog if you're okay with "weird" compliments on your stuff!

things like "biting this" and such

[inkskinned]

what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?

i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?

a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?

in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.

girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.

there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.

for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.

something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.

is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.

most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."

a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.

[captainjonnitkessler]

You know I used to think "tumblr's absolute refusal to actually engage with the Trolley Problem in favor of insisting that there must be a third, morally pure option that doesn't require them to make a hard decision and anyone who asks them to make a binary choice is just a short-sighted idiot is really fucking annoying, but I guess it's not actually doing any harm".

Anyway that was before we asked tumblr at large to decide between "guy aiding a genocide but making progress elsewhere" and "guy who would actively and enthusiastically participate in a genocide and would also make everything else much, much worse for everyone elsewhere" and the response was that there must be a third, morally pure option that doesn't require them to make a hard decision and that anyone who asks them to make a binary choice is a short-sighted idiot.

[madohomurat]

trans women are everywhere and are so eager to be seen and heard but only if they feel safe around you. if you hardly ever have trans women interacting with you, especially online, then consider there might be a reason for that and you should address it

[mmelolabelle]

“Ares…is a moron.”

I honestly don’t think that anyone is more amused by the whole “this douchebag decided to try and fight the child of the sea god on a fucking beach” of it all than Poseidon.