#or maybe not enough

[cranberrytea451]

I put too much effort into this.

[acousticbloke]

AAAH THIS WAS A PAIN IN THE ASS TO DRAW BUT IT CAME OUT SO GOOD

[fmoe1997]

Reunion

The first step is always the hardest.

That phrase had been spun so many times around Alastor he began to wonder if it was true. It certainly felt that way when he finally conceded to a new deal with the darling princess. To truly take part in her ideas of redemption. Once he found it laughable. But much like that old chestnut, it wore out its humor. When the last of his love's soul slipped through his fingers, he took it for the plausible reality it proved to be.

The truth is, the step itself isn't what makes it hard, it's what comes after. Every step is taken with a goal in mind. A set destination, an end point. But the journey there is a mystery. A dangling question with no set answer. That great unknown is what brings hesitation, with the beginning and end being absolutely certain. Only when one focuses on the end goal can they convince themselves it's attainable. So his first step landed assuredly, but here is where he remained frozen.

Was it really this simple? After everything he had done, the bad and the good, could he move forward? He almost expected a challenge, he anticipated it, yet the path ahead remained as empty as ever. As if it had always waited for him. Waited for him to take that next step. So, hesitantly, he did.

Behind him lay his past. The darkness that enshrouded him and kept him captive, trapped even in his own body. But it also held his friends, the connections he made over countless years, and the ones who helped him on this path to begin with. The thought of them made it even harder to go on. He owed them everything, but they were not his captors. Even now they encouraged him forward, so he took another step.

Before him laid his future. Endless possibilities, so bright it cast aside the gloom of the mystery beyond. As he gazed up into that ethereal light, he felt a swell rise in his chest. It uplifted him and filled him with an almost foreign warmth. Almost. Those next few steps came easier than the ones before.

As he drew closer to the glow ahead, that heat radiated outward, and with it a lifetime of memories. Much like what he had envisioned the first time he died before he was reborn anew. Only this time he saw his life thereafter, and everything that came with it.

The misery he inflicted on others, the years of perpetual torment twisted into his perverse form of entertainment. Their screams weighed heavily on his shoulders and seemingly threatened to slow his step. Where he had practically jogged, he painfully forced one foot in front of the other. As if Hell itself threatened to pull him back down. The weight of everything he had done enough to damn him all over again.

Anguished, nameless faces filled his vision and forced him to a standstill. The ease in the climb had been a ruse, as he suspected, yet even he couldn't have anticipated their protestation. The souls he ensnared shamed him for daring to tread a path not meant for him. Their vitriol quickly grew to a fever pitch, and Alastor couldn't help but agree with them.

Maybe it wasn't redemption in of itself that had been so laughable, but the idea that it could have been meant for him. He, who had delighted in the suffering of others, who had done his share of evil in the land of the living and dead. Alastor could blind himself with the morals he adhered to, but he couldn't blind those cut down by his hand.

His foot slipped down a step, and his smile dipped for the smallest fraction of a second. His eyes darted to the ball of light overhead, flickering like a dying candle. Even now the sight of it brought some meager warmth, only to be doused by the cold truth hissed in his ears. He had come close, but no cigar.

If this was meant to be his fate, then so be it. He had taken the fall before, he would do so once more. Besides, no one would be waiting for him up there, no matter what anyone else told him. Only a couple people came to mind who would even care for his absolution, yet it had been so long even they would have forgotten him by now.

As he tilted back to permit gravity to take him where he always belonged, a clawed hand shot through the wailing spirits and grabbed him. A gust of wind blew away those tormented souls and made Alastor wince. When the last of their shrieks faded to nothing, he looked up at his savior, and his breath caught in his throat.

Great white wings spread out to either side of them; gilded symbols alternated along their length. They led behind an equally white suit and tie, the dress beneath the jacket a deep blue. Although he traded red and black patterns in his fur for white and gold, he could never mistake his closest friend; his ally, and the man he wronged the most. His dear Husker.

Of all the people Alastor expected to see again, Husk had never been one of them, and that shock registered clear on his face. Although they came to better terms the last few years he had been under his employ, Alastor could never bring himself to say what needed to be said. Even when he relinquished his chains after so long, he said nothing. He simply watched in silence as his friend flew away to join the others in paradise. Those far more deserving than him.

After all, what could he say? What words could ever account for the cruelty he inflicted over an entire lifetime? How could he possibly make amends?

As if he had peered into his thoughts, Husk offered him a smirk. "It starts with sorry."

Alastor eyed him warily, suspicious of another trick. He had fallen for this road's deception once already, and he nearly lost hope of ever being reunited with the one he loved most. Of all people, Husk had little reason to see his ascent through. It would be a great irony now, after he failed to do so in the past, that all he desired was an apology.

Even Husk seemed aware of this as he cocked his head at Alastor before he brought him into a tight hug.

"We both made bad deals. But it's over now. You aren't alone anymore."

Alastor remained speechless. He hadn't uttered a word, yet Husk had already forgiven him. Ready to truly put the past behind them to focus on the future. His future. It was a sentiment he didn't deserve. Not when so much had been left unsaid between them.

Hesitantly, he brought his arms around Husk's back and returned the embrace. Through the weaved fabric he felt his downy fur, and it acted as a small source of comfort to his conflicted mind. It released a shuddered breath from his lips, and he finally found his voice.

"I am truly sorry, for everything, dear Husker. I've wanted to tell you this for so long but... pride is a fickle thing, isn't it? I've hung onto that longer than anything else. Let everyone slip through my fingers, Niffty, you... mon ange. I do not deserve this."

He finally admitted it all to him, an apology more wholehearted than anything he had ever given before. Even then it still didn't feel like enough, not that he believed anything could account for two lifetimes of sin. He felt Husk nod against his shoulder as if they shared the same thought.

"Once upon a time, I would have agreed. But it's like you said, pride is a killer. It brought me down lower than I ever thought possible, played me right into your hands. If I never let go of that pride, I don't think I would've ever ended up here."

He paused to let that admission sink in, before he further admitted, "It took some time, but I've learned to forgive ya, Al. Maybe someday, you'll even be able to forgive yourself. But now, I think it's about time you get going. Someone's been waiting a long time for you to get here."

When Husk withdrew from their embrace, Alastor looked past him to find his climb had finished. During their brief reconciliation, Husk had quietly carried him all the way to the top. That small glowing dot on the horizon had expanded to a glorious, eternal view of Heaven's gate. Gilded bars that stood high above him; they stretched to either side as far as the eye could see, seemingly into infinity.

Alastor looked on in awe of the sight, only to have his attention diverted when the doors inlaid between softly swung inwards. Through the small partition that formed, a single figure stepped through. Much like Husk, they dressed in all white, in a beautiful gown akin to that of a bride's. A white boot peeked through its part with each step they took; a golden choker locked around their neck. Unlike Husk, however, their visage had barely changed at all since he saw them last. Although their eyes glistened with sapphire orbs, Alastor could never mistake the appearance of his Angel.

Overwhelmed with what felt like a lifetime of emotions, he didn't know whether to weep at the sight, fall to his knees, run to them, or all three. In that confusion, he looked over at Husk, and the old barcat simply nodded over to the man at the gates. Alastor took that gesture as permission to go to them, and he quickly covered the distance between them in only a few strides. Tears built in the corners of his eyes with each step, and by the time they collided the two lovers wept with immense joy.

They came together as naturally as if they had never been split apart. The feeling of Angel in his arms was nothing short of euphoric. He had made it. As impossible as he would have once believed, he made it. And now that he had him again, he found it hard to let him go.

The feeling was mutual, if Angel's grip around his head was anything to go by. When Alastor finally raised his head just enough to meet Angel's loving gaze, their eyes wet with tears, he choked on a sob.

Angel nodded. "Y'know... red was always your color, but you don't look too bad in white neither."

Upon the remark, Alastor ducked his head to look at himself. Unbeknownst to him, his tattered red suit had changed into a pristine white, just as Angel said. His sleeves free of any muck or grime, and not a speck of blood to be seen on his front. He could only imagine what else about his appearance had changed. Truly a clean slate.

Alastor snorted at the observation before he ducked his head against Angel's chest. "I missed you... so much."

He felt Angel's fingers card through the back of his hair. "I did too. I can't believe you did it, you crazy son of a bitch."

Feeling more jovial, Alastor perked his head with a raised brow. "Are you implying you doubted my success?"

Angel appeared to consider the question for a moment, before he ultimately dropped the act with a smile and shook his head. "No, never."

While he answered half-jokingly, Alastor responded more seriously. "I promised I'd come back to you. Whatever it takes."

Angel teased his lip and nodded. "I know." Then he smirked and quipped, "Took you long enough."

Alastor chortled and slowly threaded his hand with one of Angel's lower ones, their fingers interlocking. "You won't ever have to wait anymore, mon ange. I'll be by your side, forever."

Angel shuddered a breath as he took Alastor's head in his upper hands. "I'd like that more than anything."

His vow reciprocated, Alastor's eyes lidded as Angel lowered his head and took his lips in his own. Soft and sweet, it marked the end to their long time apart, and the beginning of their new eternity together.

Inspired by this amazing video by @raymopon. I just needed my happy ending, yknow? Because only I can make people cry, dammit, it's not fair when other people do it! 😤😤😤

[pervcoded]

I have too much wips

[cerealboxlore]

so in the past four hours

I fully realized I was gendefluid thanks to a fanfiction headcanon of a character

Genuinely cried my entire heart out because i couldn't do math and was sad I couldn't understand anything and was scared of my professor being mad at me

And am now eating ice cream as a treat while drawing fan art for a fanfiction I haven't even written yet

Oh boy I can't wait to talk to my therapist again~

@wolfsbanesparks I thought this was funny bc of our little GL and Billy Batson talk earlier

[peeniless]

first base is me saying salmon change colour when horny

second base os how male antechinus live less than a year because they die every time they have sex

third base is me crying because chickens can't chew

[dumdumdumsalot]

Accidentally sent 'happy prude month!!🎊🥰🥰' to my asexual friend and now im gonna dunk my head in cement to become unrecognizable

[swan2swan]

Whoever conceived and animated this moment, I hope they're doing well and thriving. This is S-rank romance stuff here.

[cupcakeshakesnake]

Uncaring

[adventures-in-poor-planning]

Today I saw a pic of a baby cowbird next 2 its nest "parent" and it was so much bigger!!!!! Which is the sort of thing that gets normal people upset about the injustice of nest parasitism but makes *me* worry if baby cowbirds get bird dysmorphia

[housegoblin]

Baldur’s Gate 3: But Make it Cats🐱

[hoshizoralone]

reflection

[notbecauseofvictories]

I don't know how strictly accurate this is, but one of the things I find shocking about watching historical dramas is how many people there are around all the time---according to Madame de... (1953) a well-off French household in the Belle Epoque maintains a workforce of at least 3, and the glittering opera has staff just to open doors. According to Shogun (2024) you can expect a deep bench just to mind your household, and again, people who exist to open doors.

Could people....not open doors in the past? Were doors tricky, before the standardization of hinges? Because otherwise, the wealthy used to pay a whole bunch of people to do it for them in multiple contexts, and I find myself baffled.

[millenianthemums]

i want a shirt that has a QR code on it for some kind of horrible malware so that if anyone ever tries to film me in public their phone will automatically scan the code and be reduced to a functionless brick

[yoggybloggy]

[mangozic]

no little british boy don’t go into that yellow door