#orbs thought bubbles

[orbmanson7]

Ah

That's sure to end well...

[dailypokemoncrochet]

Leaning in to the ornament idea: what if I get those plastic ornament balls to encase each crochet before I hang them up on the ceiling. It would be like the movie. Also would protect them from dust better I hope.

[ponderingmoonlight]

Hello!! If you’re still taking requests I’d love to see a Nanami x Reader fic where the reader is pregnant but doesn’t realize yet but I’d like showing OBVIOUS symptoms and for Nanami to start to catch on to them, I don’t know if that’s like weird? 😭 Also I hope you’re doing good!!

THIS. IS. EVERYTHING.

Yeah, we're doing this right now

Nanami realizing you're pregnant before you do

Pairing: Nanami x fem!reader

Word Count: 2,2k

Synopsis: well, basically the request above hehe

Warnings: I mean, reader is pregnant lol, fluff fluff fluff, Nanami is just the greenest flag I can't, please tell me you enjoy this as much as I do, I LOVE THAT MAN

Lately, everything feels… off.

It's subtle at first. Mornings are harder than they used to be, a strange kind of sluggishness that lingers in your limbs no matter how much coffee you drink after waking up. Your back aches at the most random times. And don't even get started on the nausea that strikes out of nowhere, leaving you clutching the bathroom sink with trembling hands.

But, still, it doesn’t cross your mind - not at first.

Nanami’s been noticing though. He’s always been perceptive, sharp in the way he observes the world, but lately, his focus seems to rest more on you. It starts with the small things: a subtle glance as you push your breakfast away with a grimace, the way his brow furrows when you wince, pressing a hand to your lower back. He doesn’t ask you about it immediately, and you’re grateful for that. Nanami doesn’t rush things, never has. He knows you well enough to wait until the right moment.

Today, however, something is different.

It’s a quiet Saturday morning. You’re both in the kitchen, sunlight streaming through the curtains in soft beams. Nanami’s making coffee, his movements precise as always, while you sit at the kitchen table with your hands wrapped around a cup of ginger tea. You’ve been craving that instead of coffee these days, the rich scent of the brew turning your stomach in a way it never used to. To be honest, you’ve never been a tea drinker your whole life.

He’s noticed that too.

You yawn, stifling the sound behind your hand as you stretch in your chair. There’s a strange heaviness in your body, and the thought of going back to bed, even after a full night’s sleep, is oddly tempting. It’s the third time this week that the idea of a nap has crossed your mind before noon. You blink hard, forcing your eyes to focus, and turn to Nanami, who’s watching you over the rim of his cup.

“Are you feeling alright?” he questions, his tone neutral but his eyes searching.

“Yeah, why?” you respond, but your voice lacks its usual energy.

Even to your own ears, it sounds tired. You clear your throat and offer a small smile, hoping to brush off the question as well as the wave of concern that starts bubbling up your chest all over again.

“I’ve just been a little out of it lately, that’s all.”

Nanami places his cup down on the counter, his gaze never leaving your face.

“You’ve been ‘a little out of it’ for a while now, darling.”

There’s a weight to his words, a quiet concern that has your defenses rising instinctively. You sit up straighter, forcing a more convincing smile this time.

“I’m fine, really. Just tired. It’s probably work.”

It’s true, to some extent. Work has been stressful, the usual demands piling up, but this exhaustion feels… different. It’s deeper, sinking into your bones in a way that no amount of rest seems to fix.

Nanami doesn’t say anything right away, but you can feel him assessing you. His silence is almost louder than words. You know he won’t push you to talk, but his patience, the way he waits for you to come to your own conclusion, can be just as insistent.

You sigh, leaning back in your chair and rubbing at your eyes. There’s no way you’ll get out of this situation, not when your beloved boyfriend sits opposite of you with his calm but demanding orbs staring straight through your soul.

“I don’t know. Maybe I’m coming down with something?”

It’s a flimsy excuse, and you both know it. But before you can think of anything else to say, a wave of nausea hits you hard and fast, making you lurch forward. You press a hand to your mouth, eyes wide as the world tilts just slightly. Oh god, not again.

Nanami is at your side in an instant, his hand on your back, warm and grounding.

“Hey, hey… breathe,” he murmurs gently, his thumb rubbing small circles against your spine.

“It’s okay. Just breathe.”

You close your eyes and focus on the rhythm of your breathing, counting each inhale and exhale until the nausea begins to subside. Slowly, you sit back, wiping at your mouth with the back of your hand. The embarrassment is hot on your face, and you can’t quite meet Nanami’s eyes.

“I’m fine, Kento”, you mutter, though you can tell it sounds unconvincing.

Nanami’s hand is still on your back, his touch firm yet gentle. He doesn’t say anything, not yet. You know he’s waiting, giving you space to figure out what’s going on. But even through your haze of denial, a part of you knows the truth is starting to unravel.

“Does this happen often?”

His voice is calm, but there’s an undercurrent of something more. Something you can’t quite place.

You swallow hard, not sure how to answer.

“It’s just been the past couple of weeks,” you admit quietly.

“I think it’s stress. Maybe some kind of stomach bug?”

Nanami’s brow furrows slightly, and he crouches down beside your chair, his eyes searching your face with that same quiet intensity.

“Are there any other symptoms?”

Your mouth opens to say no, but then you stop, thinking back over the past few weeks. The tiredness, the nausea, the strange sensitivity to smells, your shifting moods - small things you’d brushed off or tried to ignore. But now, all at once, it feels like they’re adding up, slotting together in a way that you hadn’t considered before.

You glance down at your hand, the one resting on your stomach, and something inside you clicks.

Oh.

Oh.

Nanami must notice the shift in your expression because his hand stills on your back.

“What is it?” he asks, his voice low and steady.

You swallow hard, the words catching in your throat before you finally manage to speak.

“I think… I might be pregnant.”

There. You’ve said it. And the weight of those words hangs heavy in the air between you, a truth you hadn’t been ready to acknowledge until now.

Kento doesn’t react immediately. His expression stays calm, though you can see the flicker of something in his eyes - surprise, perhaps, or maybe something more. Did he already suspect this? Is this why he pushed you to think about your symptoms further? Slowly, he straightens up, standing in front of you now as he takes a deep breath.

“Are you sure?”

You shake your head, feeling a little lost.

“I’m not. I… I hadn’t really thought about it until just now.”

The truth is, you hadn’t considered the possibility at all. With everything going on - work, life, the general busyness of existing, it hadn’t crossed your mind that this could be the reason behind everything you’ve been feeling.

But now that it’s out in the open, you can’t help but wonder how you missed the signs.

Nanami’s hand gently cups your chin, tilting your face up so that you’re looking at him. His gaze is steady, calm in a way that grounds you, just like always.

“Let’s not jump to conclusions yet,” he says quietly.

“But if you think there’s a chance…”

You nod, your throat suddenly tight.

“Yeah. There might be.”

For a long moment, neither of you says anything. The air between you feels thick with unspoken emotions, a quiet understanding settling between you. Nanami steps closer, his hand moving from your chin to cup your cheek instead, his thumb brushing against your skin.

“We’ll figure this out,” he murmurs, his voice soft.

“Together.”

The sincerity in his words washes over you, bringing with it a flood of emotions you hadn’t realized you were holding back. You blink, your vision blurring slightly as you reach up to cover his hand with yours.

“I’m scared,” you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.

Nanami’s expression softens, and he leans down, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

“I know. But whatever happens, we’ll face it together. I promise” he mutters against your skin.

You nod, your heart swelling with a mix of fear, uncertainty, and something else, something warmer, softer. You aren’t alone in this. No matter what happens, you have your boyfriend by your side, steady and unshakable.

He pulls back slightly, his eyes meeting yours again.

“Do you want to take a test?” he asks, his voice careful, as if he’s gauging your readiness.

You hesitate, biting your lip.

“I… I don’t know. Maybe? I mean, I guess I should, right?”

Nanami nods, but he doesn’t push.

“Whenever you’re ready.”

The idea of taking a test feels overwhelming, like it would make everything real in a way you’re not sure you’re prepared for. But at the same time, the uncertainty is starting to weigh on you, the not knowing gnawing at the edges of your thoughts.

You take a deep breath, closing your eyes for a moment as you try to gather yourself. When you open them again, Nanami is still there, watching you with that quiet patience you’ve come to rely on so much.

“Okay,” you say finally, your voice trembling just a little.

“Okay. I’ll take a test.”

Nanami squeezes your hand gently, a reassuring presence beside you.

“I’ll go get one,” he offers, his tone calm and matter-of-fact, like he’s suggesting something as simple as picking up groceries.

You nod, feeling a little more settled now that a decision has been made.

“Yeah, okay. Thank you.”

He leans down, pressing another soft kiss to your forehead before pulling back.

“I’ll be back soon.”

With that, he grabs his keys and heads for the door, casting one last glance over his shoulder before he slips out into the hallway.

Once he’s gone, the quiet of the apartment feels almost too loud. You sit there for a long moment, staring at the cup of tea in front of you, your mind racing with thoughts you can’t quite hold onto.

Pregnant. You might be pregnant.

The idea feels too big, too surreal to grasp, and yet it’s there, lingering just at the edge of your awareness. A part of you is scared, terrified of the changes this could bring. But another part, a part you’re only just beginning to acknowledge, feels something else. Hope, maybe? Excitement? It’s hard to tell.

All you know for sure is that everything feels different now, that your whole life will be turned upside down if this test comes out positive.

When Nanami returns a short while later, test in hand, you take it from him with trembling fingers. He doesn’t say anything, just gives you a small, reassuring nod as you disappear into the bathroom.

The minutes that follow are some of the longest of your life. You pace back and forth in front of the sink, your heart pounding in your chest as you wait for the results. The silence feels deafening, and all you can do is focus on your breathing, trying to keep yourself calm.

Finally, the time is up. You glance down at the test, your breath catching in your throat as you read the result.

Positive.

You stare at it for a long moment, your mind struggling to process what you’re seeing. And then, slowly, the reality starts to sink in.

You’re pregnant.

With shaking hands, you open the bathroom door to find Nanami standing just outside, waiting. He looks up at you, his expression calm but expectant.

“Well?” he asks quietly.

You swallow hard, your voice catching in your throat as you hold up the test.

“It’s positive.”

For a moment, Nanami doesn’t say anything. His eyes flicker to the test in your hand, and then back to your face, his expression unreadable. And then, slowly, he steps forward, wrapping his arms around you in a gentle, grounding embrace.

“We’re going to be okay,” he murmurs against your hair.

“You’re going to be okay.”

And somehow, with his arms around you, you really believe him. Maybe you will be able to work this out. After all, you have none other than Kento Nanami by your side, right?

“Kento…”, you begin, the flood of sniffs and wild emotions now slowly but surely calming down.

“What is it, darling?”

“Did you…did you know?”

He sends a small smile your way while gently stroking a strand of hair behind your ear.

“I couldn’t be sure. But after seeing you like this for a couple of weeks now, I had some suspicions”, he admits quietly.

You let out a huff.

“I can’t believe you realized it earlier than I did.”

“You are my life, (y/n). I notice every little thin about you.”

“And now you’ll be the father of a child”, you breathe out.

The words still feel strange while rolling off your tongue. Kento Nanami will be a father – the father of your child.

You are pregnant.

This is real.

“And I couldn’t ask for a better mother for my child.”

Tags:

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@ryva @kenjakusconcubine @baku2345 @komelrebi-san @deezy12299

@okay-it-is-ivy @paridoliaaa @cupcaketeddybehr @ryumurin

[evilgwrl]

TF 141 x Reader (Apocalypse!AU)

Immune: Six

WARNING: This is a 18+ Poly!141 series (MDNI)

CW: Oral (f & brief male receiving), barn sex yeehaw, PIV (no protection), praise, I love gaz sm he’s so fucking sexy and hot, titty sucking, more hickies!!!!

Masterlist

Your brow cocked towards the Scotsman, his arms folded against the width of his chest as he stared at you, Arctic blue orbs swirling with mischief as he stepped closer to you, chapped lips flushed against the heat of your forehead before he was strumming upstairs.

The day was sombre. The sky was roiling, a pall of menacing clouds enveloping the forest with a darkened haze, the soft jingles of the wind chimes sounding out to you as you rushed the horses into the barn, snouts whining and hissing out breathy grunts as a roll of thunder cracked through.

Bubbling heat simmered in the pit of your stomach; your body flushed with fervour as you scurried outside, your legs turning to mush as anxious feet padded against the soil, parched digits digging into reins. Your body ached with a needing demand, a need to be satisfied, not only by Price but by them all.

It was taboo. It should feel wrong. This wasn’t you. The growing ache that seethed between your thighs, only fed into the perpetual insistence that needed to be met. You needed to be fucked. Again, and again and again.

You rolled your eyes at yourself, the flush of iris visible as you trembled into the barn, pulling on Nancy as she trotted along, heavy hoofs skating across the already dirtied floors. As you secured the horses away, your eyes trained in on the door, the sound of heavy footsteps coiling into your stomach before Gaz appeared.

You weren’t quite sure what it was about him. He gave you a sense of comfort, his eyes gentle yet zealous, speckles of gold flaking through the endless diversions of umber. His presence was homely, settling around you like a forest fire, fusillading the anguished need you held for him. His smile was soft as he gazed at you, standing bashfully at the barn doors, chiselled arms pressed against the wood.

“Thought I would find you here,” he remarked, taking a step forward as he felt the spit of rain pellet down on his warm skin.

You raised a brow, “You looking for me?” Your tone was knowing, almost teasing as he let out a shy laugh, pearly teeth on display as his tongue kissed them, the simmer of the light reflecting against them. He was pretty, almost too pretty, the arrogant broil of his eyes sending a pit into your stomach as he stepped closer.

“Just felt like we, I, haven’t thanked you properly.”

“It’s alright, Gaz. Couldn’t exactly turn you all away, could I?” You tried to make light of the situation, your eyes averting to the floor as you shifted awkwardly.

“You gonna let me thank you, sweetheart? Hm?”

Your feet were clumsy, as you stumbled back, spine flush against a bale of hay as he stalked towards you. You felt like his prey, tantalising jaws snapping down on the silk of your flesh as he sucked the sweet liquor of your blood into his taste buds. Cadaverous hands groped at your thigh, melting the softness of the fat into his hands as he practically cooed at you.

His voice was patronising, threads of disdain lacing it as his grip found your knees, pulling them apart gently. Straw scratched at your legs, sending a jolt through you as you watched him through hooded eyes. His eyes were darker now, flushed over with desire as he pushed his crotch up against you, an evident bulge covered by denim petting your clad heat almost maliciously as you gulped down the air that flooded your organs.

Nails dug into your tender skin, crescent-shaped moons tattooing along the flesh as you whined. “I asked you a question,” he tsked, kissing along your jaw.

“Y-Yeah, you can thank me.”

The strain of your voice enveloped a laugh out of him, rough hands toying with your top before you lifted your arms up, bare chest on display as the cool air puckered up your nipples, his eyes darting between the two before his hands were wrapping around your neck, pushing against you slightly to arch your back before feverish lips were tugging at the buds, teasing them between his teeth before he would pull away and suck at the sore skin, tainted by hickies.

“Old man wanted to mark you up,” he growled as his hands released from your neck, toying with your tits as your core ached. The sensation was all too much, yet not enough. Greedy hips ground against the bulge that was pressed against you, a groan sounding out from between your tits.

“Are you gonna thank me?” You quipped, pulling at his hair as he clutched a nipple between his lips before pulling away with a subtle pop.

“Greedy, aren’t you?  Just need to be filled up by us all?” Gaz smirked.

Your hips responded for you, pussy clenching around nothing as you panted, your breath wanton. His digits found your buttons, plucking at them before you raised yourself, letting him slide them off down you revealing your aching sex, thin cotton smeared against it as your slick darkened them. Gaz groaned in reply, rubbing at the wet patch feverishly as your lips found his neck, licking a stripe against his defined collarbone.

You swore, your voice lost in the crackle of the wind as he peeled your panties to the side, your aching cunt throbbing as he spread your folds apart, smiling in appreciation at the sloppy strings of slick webbing between your lips.

“Pretty fucking pussy,” he nodded as he pushed you back, throwing your legs over his shoulders as a rough thumb pressed against your clit, almost unsure if he wanted to use his fingers or mouth before he settled for both, his wet muscle toying with your entrance before plunging in, enveloping your gummy walls with his spit as his digit engulfed harsh circles around the sensitive nub.

Needy moans left your throat as you palmed at the hay below you, another hand buried in his hair, fingers digging into his scalp as your pussy rode along his tongue, chasing a desperate release.

His touch was electric, spreading zaps of energy throughout you, engulfing your spine as your back arched further at the torment of his tongue, his laps gargling against your slick as he teased you.

Feverish hands wrapped around the fat of your thighs, bruising touches doubling every sensation you felt as you mewled against him, bucking your hips as you chased your high.

Teeth grazed against your throbbing clit, the sensation almost overwhelming as you gasped out, full lips sucking the bud as you convulsed, the air thick with arousal as the breathy sounds of your moans sipped through the holes of the barn walls.

Rain slashed against the roof as you threw your head back, Gaz’s torture against your pussy stimulating every nerve in your cunt as you choked out, gasping for oxygen as you found yourself holding your breath, too focused on the pleasure he was wracking through you.

His assault was continuous, his muscle lapping at your heat, slick pooling below you as fingers tightened against the straw, scratching against your palm.

“Oh - fuck,” you whined, your voice raising an octave as pleasure coiled in your stomach, spindling through every muscle and nerve as your legs convulsed, your belly tightening until it snapped, sending your eyes rolling back as you clutched onto the bale below you, Gaz’s mouth moaning against your slit as you cried out.

Your actions were clumsy as you pushed his face away at the overstimulation, your clit swollen as you took in his pussy-drunk expression, full lips glistening with your arousal, a trail of spit dribbling down his chin as he smiled at you.

“Please fuck me,” you quipped, clutching onto his shoulder before a hand gripped at the tent in his pants, palming the aching member with need as he growled against your neck, nipping the tender flesh before his hands were at his belt.

Gaz nodded as you pulled him in roughly, your tongues lashing against each other as you hummed at the taste of yourself, the tangy feeling melting between your saliva as the Sergeant tore his slacks down his muscled thighs.

You broke the kiss, looking down at his member. He was longer than John with less girth, yet still staggering in size, the mushroom tip flushed a begging purple as silk pearls of pre-cum coiled down his aching length.

Needy hips aligned with yours as he flushed the tip against your folds, smirking at the gooey sounds of your wetness. You whined in anguish. You felt like you were in heat, your body craving your womb to be filled.

The burn stretched through you, your brows furrowing in pain as you pushed against his chest before his hands were against yours, soothing you as he kissed you, setting a bruising pace between your lips, his cock working through you inch by inch as you gasped.

“That’s it baby, relax for me. Good girl.”

His tone was soft as he praised you, working through the tightness of your gummy walls with ease before he bottomed out, heavy balls slapping against the crevice of your ass as your neck buried in the crook of his neck.

“Please, I need you,” you whimpered, lips nibbling at his neck, savouring the salty taste of his sweat before he chuckled, his hips bucking against your sweet spot, his tip kissing your cervix deliciously as he began to rock inside you, setting a slow pace as he felt every ridge against his cock.

His tongue was filthy as he spat out expletives, his pace quickening with every fleeting second as you bashfully choked out whines and moans into his skin.

“Taking me so fucking well, Jesus Christ.”

His strokes were brutal, rubbing against your cervix selfishly as your mouth sounded out babbles, your eyes rolled back as you felt the trickle of sweat pooling at the back of your knees.

The pleasure was white hot, engulfing you with demand as you submitted your entirety to him, falling limp as his hips slapped against your sensitive skin, his fingers tugging at your nipples through your slouched figure as you moaned.

His pace fastened once more before he grunted, pulling out as his cock pulsated with the need to cum. Your motions were sloppy as you gripped the shaft, knees buckling as you lifted yourself to the floor, his member coated with your slick as you hummed at the taste, tracing the veins with your tongue whilst another hand cupped his heavy balls, squeezing them with a gentle motion before gargling the remainder of his cock down the pillow of your mouth.

“Holy fuck,” he bucked, hips moving rhythmically before he spluttered out, his cum gushing down the naval of your throat as you coughed, swallowing down the thick liquid with a huff as the remainder dribbled out of your lip.

Gaz’s hand found your hair, stroking the sweat along your forehead as he pulled you up, resting you along the hay again before dressing you slightly, as well as himself, before tugging you into the plushness of his chest, lazy legs wrapping around his waist before he was jogging with you through the downpour of the rain.

Holy fuck balls I feel like my writing has gotten so SLACK!!!!!

[lex-the-flex]

Soured Whiskey

Logan Howlett x reader

Summary: Your one night stand with a handsome stranger at the bar leads to a different endeavor.

Word Count: 2k

Warning(s): HEAVY ANGST, brief cursing, small moments of action and violence, brief drinking, Logan being protective, MEGA FLUFF, SMUT 18+ – Unprotected sex (wrap it up kids), oral (f! receiving), fingering, skin + body appreciation, Logan being a gentleman and the reader being lovely. (Basically distant soulmates).

A/N: I'm officially seeing Deadpool and Wolverine tomorrow and I'm so excited! But in the meantime, I thought I'd add to the pile of Wolverine smut.

Strings of ornately hung light bulbs decorate the bar, bringing a cozy old-school vibe to the modernized saloon. Closing the door behind you, the cold city atmosphere was instantly transformed into a quaint and warm invitation. You’re friends couldn’t stop raving about this new bar and that you all just had to go here and try the endless menu of cocktails and tapas. 

So through your busy work week, your friends informed you to meet at the bar on Friday once the sun started to go down. But much to your dismay, your friends bailed on you, even after repaying that they’d be there for you and help you unwind, to de-stress.

You got stood up. By your own good friends who you thought had your back. 

Sighing to yourself, it was too late to give up now. You were already here, so you might as well order a drink. 

Sitting at the bar, you sat up straight on the stool, not paying attention to who was sitting next to you. It didn’t matter. Patiently waiting for the bartender, the sight of someone sitting next to you crosses your peripheral vision. The man’s muscular arms lean against the counter, reaching for a couple of fresh cashews. 

“Hey there, what can I get you?” The bartender asks. 

“Just a whiskey sour, please.” You reply. 

“Got it, and same for you, sir?” He questions, pushing a singular whiskey glass to the person to your right. 

“Yeah, thanks.” The stranger replies. 

The stranger’s gruff voice takes you by surprise, but you pay him no mind. 

Rolling the coaster in between his fingers, the bartender places your bright whiskey sour in front of you. The refreshing yellow foamy drink is adorned with a lemon swirl and a dried cherry for garnish. Just the sight of it makes a well-deserved smile rise through your lips. Taking a sip of the cold drink, the bartender turns to the back wall with the more expensive bottles of liquor, and passes it to the stranger on your right. 

Getting a glimpse his way, the man finally comes into view. His masculine features take over your attention; the man’s full dark head of hair, beard, and strong jaw seem to put you in a hypnotic state. Glancing towards you, his light hazel eyes gaze into your e/c orbs, providing a somewhat welcoming gaze, however his stern and annoyed expression makes you turn away. 

Returning to your drink, the stranger lowers his arm next to yours, letting you see a freshly lit cigar in his hand. Blowing the smoke away from you, he silently watches you take another swig of your drink before checking the empty text message bubble once again. 

“Rough day?” He asks. 

Sighing into your hands, you jokingly squint your eyes at the stranger, and set your phone down.

“You have no idea. I‘be been craving this damn drink all day.” You reply.

Running your index finger around the rim of the almost empty glass. Smirking, the stranger raises his glass towards yours. 

“Name’s Logan.” He says. 

“I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you Logan.” You answer, clinking your glass with his. 

Finishing your drinks and dinner in a comfortable silence, Logan silently watches you, observing some of your mannerisms that stand out to him. The way you sit perfectly straight, how you wipe your mouth after every bite, and even the outfit you picked for yourself. Your light grey cardigan sits perfectly on your shoulders along with the casual white button-up shirt that was underneath it. The pair of black dress pants and ankle boots make you look professional yet comfortable and he liked that. 

However, this minuscule moment of peace didn’t last long. The scent of strong liquor and the hint of douchebag lingers in the air behind you and Logan. Taking another puff of his cigar, Logan glances your way, warning you to not pay these drunken idiots any attention. 

Polishing off the remainder of your drink, Logan waves for the bartender, and prepares to take your tab. 

“I got it, Logan. Don’t worry about me.” You advise. 

Placing his hand over yours, Logan stops you from using your debit card, motioning to the three men behind you. 

“That’s not what I’m worried about, darlin’.” He warns. 

“You shouldn’t worry about her, man. We can take care of her. We’ll take her off your hands.” One of the drunk men sneers. 

“No thanks, boys. I’m happy where I stand.” You state, looking at Logan, rubbing your fingers over his knuckles. 

Joining you and Logan, the bartender slams his hands on the counter. 

“I told the three of you that you’re not allowed in here! Get out before there’s trouble.” He orders.

“Or what, man? What will you do? We’ve been coming here since… this place opened.” The idiot spurs, stuttering to give a clear answer. 

Blowing off his friends, the young man stumbles to your left side, slipping on the way to nonchalantly lean on the bar, still desperate to impress you. Ignoring him, Logan watches the other two men leave the bar altogether, clearly done with their friend’s shit. 

“Lemme take you out and show you a good time, beautiful. Surely I can do better than the guy on your right. I know I can fuck you better than him.” He explains. 

Not noticing that he’s crossed your personal space line, you instinctively back up into Logan, who’s nearly at his breaking point. 

“Look, bub. She said no. So, take the hint and get the hell out of here. She’s with me.” Logan rebuttals, just as a wave of rage overtakes his voice. 

The sudden sense of feeling claustrophobic creeps out on every single inch of your skin. Glancing down at your hands, you discover that you’re now white-knuckling the edge of the wooden countertop, and Logan begins to ball his fist around his whiskey glass. 

Leaning closer to you, the young man tries once again, and fully crosses the line. 

“Come on, sweetheart. Let me treat you better.” He whispers next to your face. 

Suddenly, you see red. The stranger’s hand touches your mid thigh and you merely fly back on the barstool. 

“Get the fuck off me!” You shout, pushing the man away. 

Within seconds, Logan pushes himself from his own seat, and grabs the young man by his hoodie. Punching the man in the face, he falls to the floor with a streak of blood leaking out of his nose. Wiping his nose, the bartender manages to pull Logan away, before returning to tend to the young man. Tugging Logan closer, he subconsciously wraps his arms around your frame, making sure that you’re out of harm's way. 

“You alright?” He asks in a low whisper.

Silently nodding, the two of you refuse to move, and your hand is still lingering on his chest.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” You answer.

*****

Within seconds of shutting your front door behind you, Logan was on you. Deepening the kiss between you both, you could tell that he wanted more. Pushing you against the door, a growl escapes from Logan as he picks you up and walks into the kitchen. Placing you on the marble countertop, his hands work quickly to rid you of the cardigan on your shoulders.

Gliding his lips down to your neck, you wrap your legs around Logan’s waist. Feeling a small moan escape from your lips, you swore that he might fuck you on the cold countertop. But he wasn’t that rebellious. Tearing his own jacket off, Logan carefully carries you through the apartment and down the hallway to your bedroom.

Sitting you down on the edge of your bed, he momentarily breaks the space between you and lifts your shirt from your body. Tossing it across the room, Logan bends down and takes your face in his hands.

“You sure you want this, darlin’? I don’t want to give you the wrong impression.” Logan advises, gently stroking your cheek.

“I’m sure. I want this with you. And only you.” You consent with a nod. 

Silently nodding, Logan slowly leans in and pulls you in passionately. His kiss is slow and steady, allowing him to relax at this moment. Feeling his heart swell, Logan couldn’t remember the last time someone wanted him in the way that you do.

Discarding the remainder of both of your clothes, you lay down on the comforter, melting into the soft fabric and Logan follows suit. Gripping his broad shoulders, your fingers press into his hot skin as his lips lock onto yours. Trailing his hand down your bare body, Logan’s fingers reach beneath the waistband of your lacy underwear and press against your clit.

Meeting your throbbing folds with his fingertips, you break the kiss and moan into his mouth. Staring into his hazel eyes, his orbs light up, fueling the sensation of your lust. Rubbing circles into your clit, Logan descends your body with a series of longing kisses to each part he passes.

Discarding the fabric from your core, Logan kisses the sensitive skin of each of your thighs, feeling you shake before him. His scruff makes you chuckle as he can hear your heartbeat ringing in his ears. Licking your folds, your breath hitches in the back of your throat as you watch Logan become more and more mesmerized by you.

“You’re so beautiful, Y/N…” He whispers in the dark.

Connecting his lips with your clit, a moan escapes from your lips. Pushing his tongue past your entrance, Logan holds your hips in place to keep you from squirming. Gripping the thin comforter, you squeeze your eyes shut, unable to handle the heat rising in your face.

Watching you from afar, Logan continues to eat you out in a steady fashion, letting you enjoy the moment. Running your fingers through his thick hair, you can feel a butterfly sensation rising up to your core. Sensing your body working with his, Logan gently squeezes your hips, lifting you just a touch. Tasting your orgasm reaching its end, your toes curl against the bedding and you cum against Logan’s tongue.

Gasping for air, Logan crawls before you, and his entire physique comes to life. His strong muscles and veins don’t frighten you like so many others, but here everything about him brings you comfort. Wrapping your legs around his waist, Logan balances himself over you, still making sure this is what you want.

“I want you, Logan. All of you, I trust you.” You declare, wrapping your arms around him.

Your vow brings the thought of tears to his tortured eyes, knowing that he has truly deserved this moment.

Lovingly holding his face, Logan briefly touches the tip of your nose with his.

“I don’t want to hurt you.” He responds.

“You won’t.” You advise him.

Leaning his forehead against yours, Logan rubs the tip of his cock in time with your folds, sending excitement through his veins. Sliding himself past your entrance, the two of you look at each other, sharing a loving moan. Thrusting his hips together, Logan longs to be deep inside you. He wanted to forget about the world and get lost in you.

Burying his face in your neck, Logan leaves no space between the two of you. Moving in time with his loving thrusts, the sensation of Logan’s manhood against your walls felt like a new stress reliever that you didn’t know you needed. Surrendering to this new wave of euphoria, your fingers run along the strong muscles along Logan’s back, touching the flexing fibers beneath his hot skin. Sinking deeper into you, Logan finds your sensitive spot, causing you to aggressively scratch his back. 

Clutching the back of his head, the new scars heal within seconds, whilst Logan slightly groans from the light ripple of pain. A burning sensation of heat starts to rise in your core, you could no longer handle the tension, and Logan continues to ride out the remainder of your orgasm in pure awe of you. Gasping for air, Logan surrounds his arms around your body, and rolls the two of you on your sides. 

Pressing his forehead on yours, Logan’s warmth cascades over you, giving you a blanket of warmth in the cool room. Shifting in his arms, he gently runs his fingers through your hair, just as you trace his dimples. 

“Well, thank you for a very interesting night, Logan.” You whisper. 

Smiling, the two of you share a loving laugh together, and Logan pulls the comforter over you, succumbing to the warmth beneath the blanket. 

wolverine taglist ~

@dreamliners

@miss1sarcasmo

@yellow-eyed-sams-wife

@lost-in-horrorland

@peterparkernotfound

@pcrushinnerd

@foursthemagicknumber

[brittle-doughie]

https://www.tumblr.com/brittle-doughie/780590946638266368/httpsyoutube5tfirheq3twsi-68gx29ypt-nhhiya-br

Okay, Brittle, Here is my theory of how Eternal Sugar Cookie would lock/chain/cage Y/n. In this image, Y/n is trapped in a sphere orb floating in overgrown rose thorns while the “angels” are guarding it. Or yeah…

But what’s your thought on “How would Eternal Sugar Cookie put in captive/caged”???

I’d go with that with it being like the Prison Bubble from Gravity Falls, it has everything Y/N Cookie needs and so much more that they’d come close to preferring life inside the orb, eternal happiness for them.

It’s only when Hollyberry or another ally snaps them out of it will the vines come in as well as Eternal Sugar’s angels coming in to investigate.

[bloodmoonmuses]

strawberry sunday | lee haechan

genre: lee haechan x reader, established relationship, fluff, drabble (0.4k words)

You’re awoken by the bubbling of your electric kettle, Haechan pouring hot water over tea bags. A yellow mug for you, a green one for him. It’s a perfect Sunday morning- one of those days after a storm where the sun is glistening off puddles and the air is crisp with rain. Where time feels like it’s passing in slow motion, and every limb is laden with languidness. The kitchen window is open, floral curtains swaying slightly in the wind. Haechan is humming to himself, fluttering around on the balls of feet as he prepares breakfast.

“G’morning,” you mumble as you shuffle into the kitchen, a blanket strewn over your shoulders. You cozy up behind Haechan, placing your chin on his shoulder as he plops a few spoonfuls of sugar into your respective cups. Three for you, five for him. You wonder if he’s committed your preferences to memory or if it's a force of habit. You smile into your initial sip, nodding your head as a thank you. 

“Was just about to make toast,” Haechan says. He places a chaste kiss on your nose. “Missed you.”

As you take a seat at the dining table, you say, “Missed me? We’ve been asleep for, like, ten hours.” You warm your hands with your mug, loving the bitter aftertaste of the Earl Grey. 

Then, Haechan takes a jar of strawberry jam and some butter out of the fridge and places them before you. “And those ten hours were torturous.” 

You scoff at his dramatics. “For me, maybe. How has your snoring gotten worse?”

“You hate me,” Haechan concludes as he gets a loaf of bread out of the pantry. “You didn’t even let me tell you about my dream.”

He loads the toaster, then sits across from you at the table, honeyed skin all satiny in its luster. He’s beautiful, even at six in the morning, and your eyes zero in on the space where his jawline melts into the expanse of his neck. You want to put your nose there. Or behind his ear. Or against his nose. 

“Let me guess, it was about me?”

Haechan rolls his eyes. “Yeah, but it was weird.” 

“Weird how?”

“Like, we were these orbs of energy. Of heat. And I couldn’t tell where I ended and you began. We kept… merging into each other. We were endless.” 

The intensity of his words is sliced by the sound of perfectly golden toast popping out of the little machine. You watch as Haechan wordlessly retrieves the bread, bringing the plate back for the two of you to share. As he walks back, you outstretch your arms, making a grabbing motion with your hands. Haechan understands immediately, sitting on your lap and cupping your hands with his own. You place your nose just where you had imagined, that crevice at the junction of his ear and neck, the warmth spreading through your body like wildfire. Any remnants of cold in you dissipate in a shudder- like making a wish on a dandelion. 

“Endless like right now?” you whisper into Haechan’s ear. He wraps his foot around your calf, the intertwining of limbs like the most lovesick Girl Scout knot. Like a scarf crocheted in the moonlight. Like a labor of love. 

“Mhm.”

He spreads some jam on a piece of toast and hands it to you, turning his torso to leave his hand beneath your chin and catch the crumbs that fall. You take a bite. So hilariously thoughtful.

“What’s funny?” Haechan asks as a laugh warbles through your chest. 

“I love you so much.”

a/n: unedited, feedback is always appreciated! thx for reading! <3

[bernardsbendystraws]

this is me requesting bubs and chris to blow bubbles together :>

𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐁𝐮𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬 — 𝐂.𝐒.

SUMMARY ʚɞ Your first kiss with Chris

CW ʚɞ kissing

PAIRING ʚɞ Bubble .ᐟ Reader x Chris Sturniolo

A/N: COPYRIGHT NOTICE. This takes place after this. Can be read as a standalone tho!

With love and big tits, Rose ➜ au masterlist

Giggles and laughter echo between the shaking branches. Chris stands next to you, his shoulder bumping yours as he holds the bottle of bubbles upward, pulling out the stick and blowing gently. 

You watch as the iridescent ball floats in the air. The light wind makes you more aware of your hair stiffening on the back of your neck, the sight of his lips pursing becoming tempting. 

Today has been amazing. Chris took you out on your first date together, and a second date directly after. You were only supposed to get ice cream together this time. However, you spent so much time rambling that the shop started to close up, but neither of you were done talking. 

“I wanna eat ‘em,” you announce, your eyes drifting as you watch the bubble burst while hitting a thick tree next to you. 

Chris brought you here, a quiet playground. He knew the sunset would be absolutely beautiful, it only seemed fitting to bring you here. 

He cocks a brow at you, his eyes twinkling with excitement as an idea pushes through his mind. “I can put one on my lips, look,” he tuts, bragging as he blows a bubble, just barely pushing it to form into a ball before moving the stick, balancing the orb on his relaxed lips. 

“Woah, can I try?” 

Chris nods at your question. Although, when you try, you aren’t successful. The bubble pops before you can even touch it with your lips. As you go to try again, the exact same order of events repeat. 

After your fourth try, Chris blinks widely, swallowing thickly as a warmth spreads through his chest. “I, uh—maybe I can help? Is that okay?” he asks, nervously chewing on his lip. 

Oh. You like that thought—a lot. You nod firmly, your breath hitching in your chest as he grabs the tube, blowing a bubble and balancing it on his lips. 

He stares at you with questioning eyes. A subtle affirming nod of your head makes him lean in slowly.  

You can feel your heart thumping in every pore of your body. The anticipation as you watch him lean closer and closer—

You don’t think twice. It’s like he’s dangling some sort of magic right in front of your face, you can’t help but fall into him, the bitter taste of the bubble mixture making your system realize what you’ve done as your lips fall on his.

With wide eyes, you pull back. “Sorry, I—”

This time, Chris lets his instincts take over. He curves his hand around your waist, leaning down as he presses his lips against yours. It’s so delicate it hurts. 

Your hands travel upwards, tangling in his hair as you pull him closer. The feeling of him humming against you leaves a vibration that makes your stomach drop, an electrifying warmth consuming you as you feel his lips slot against yours. 

It tastes like bubbles, but neither of you mind in the slightest.

A/N: I love them so much, you don’t understand. I’d drink chlorine to be these hoes fr.

With love and big tits, Rose 🌹

[orbmanson7]

Scorpy does it again...

Incredible, truly

[ozzgin]

Do u have a wind chime Anon? 🎐 if not can I be it?

thinking about asylum spider in the sewer… he probably stinky

well now I wanna give him a bubble bath

I'm going to hope that you have a tub big enough for those spider appendages, heh.

Otherwise, he'd 1000% love it. Being wrapped up and mostly immobile probably left him with some sensory issues, so I suspect he'd be very touchy and enthusiastic about any kind of feeling once he's out of the straight jacket.

"What's the matter?" you ask, stopping your scrubbing motion and gazing at the pale creature currently sitting in your bathtub.

He squints towards you, though his blank orbs don't seem to have a particular direction. His mouth is slightly open, as if he's trying to let out words presently lodged in the back of his throat.

A thought strikes you, and you hesitantly suggest:

"Do you want me to get in the tub with you? Is that it?"

The monstrous being suddenly begins to nod, stretching his long, slender fingers towards your face.

[Main Story]

[goose8791]

Piercings

warnings: mentions piercings

"Luke, sit still," she instructed, her voice a gentle yet firm command.

"How can I sit still when you have a needle next to my face?" he retorted, a hint of playful defiance in his tone.

"You wanted me to pierce your ear," she reminded him, a mischievous glint in her eyes. The needle in her hand caught the soft glow of the dim room. From his spot on the couch, he looked up at her, a playful challenge dancing in his eyes. In response, she rolled her eyes.

"Don’t make this weird, okay?" she told him, a playful smile tugging at the corner of her lips. Before he could say anything, she threw her leg over his, positioning herself so she sat on his lap, facing him. The sudden closeness caught him off guard, and his face lit up in a subtle shade of red. Leaning closer into his side, she resumed her attempt to pierce his ear.

"Stay still," she murmured, her breath brushing against his neck. He froze, feeling the warmth of her proximity. Her fingers skillfully moved back his curls from around his ears as she drew a small dot with the pen that she grabbed from behind her ear. 

She shifted back to face him, a question lingering in her eyes. "Do you actually want me to do this?" she queried, raising an eyebrow inquisitively. His nod was emphatic, his gaze fixed on her face.

"You sure?" she pressed again, a hint of teasing in her tone. "Yes! Gods, just do it," he responded, frustration and fluster evident in his voice.

"Okay, okay, okay," she chuckled, her laughter filling the room. Leaning back toward his ear, the needle poised, she deftly pricked the skin. Pressure followed, and instinctively, his hands flew to her waist, thumbs pressing into her hips. Unyielding, she remained determined, pushing the needle through the skin. A hiss escaped him, his fingers digging into her hip bone.

"I'm almost done," she whispered, threading the metal through the skin. Another hiss followed, his fingers maintaining their grip on her hips. With practised ease, she screwed the end of the piercing, ensuring it wouldn't move. A tap on his shoulder signalled the completion of the task. "You're done," she laughed, amusement dancing in her eyes as she observed his reaction, his eyes screwed shut in both pain and relief. 

"You know, for the best swordsman in camp, I really thought that you wouldn’t be scared of a little needle," she teased, laughter bubbling in her voice. His eyes opened, brown orbs locking onto hers.

"Oh, shut up," he retorted, rolling his eyes, and his hands loosened their grip slightly on her hips.

"Make me, Castellan," she quipped, playfully attempting to pull her leg off him. However, she found herself unable to move as he smoothly pulled her back onto his lap. 

"What?" she questioned, her tone attempting to maintain composure as the awareness of his hands and the subtle pressure of his thumbs against her skin sent shivers down her spine.

"I’m shutting you up," he smirked, the mischievous glint in his eyes promising mischief. Before she could react, he kissed her, it wasn’t harsh or rough but sweet catching her off guard. The initial startle gave way to a reciprocated passion as she found herself kissing him back, her hands instinctively wrapping around his neck.

In the hushed aftermath of their unexpected kiss, she pulled back, a stunned expression on her face. "What was that for?" she asked, her voice a breathless whisper that betrayed the lingering traces of their shared moment.

He leaned back, a smug smirk playing on his lips. "You talk too much, and I needed a way to shut you up," he replied, his eyes sparkling with a mischievous glint.

She rolled her eyes, a playful smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "You have unconventional methods, Castellan."

"I'm a man of action," he quipped, his hands still lingering at her hips.

[heavypressure]

Insane thought, but i want my tits to swell for the same gross reasons my belly usually swells. Stuffing my face for several day straight? Not only my stomach is a disgustingly swollen, heavy orb, so are my tits. Resting on top of my gut, big, tight and bloated, rising with every breath i take.

Feeling particularly gassy, pressure building inside my guts, inflating my belly every minute? Well, that impacts my tits too. You can clearly see how catastrophic my indigestion is if not only my stomach is a bubbling roaring balloon, but so are my tits. My whole bloated body throbbing from the amount of gases moving inside

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

what is a simpy logan like?

Logan's hung up. He's not in a good mood. All these years carrying that torch for Jean and he's just plain tired. He's tired of all these new ones he has to train and all the things he has to hold inside. Everyone thinks he doesn't have a heart, but if he didn't he wouldn't be so miserable.

He sits and watches the new batch of mutants. He's not impressed. He takes out his cigar and wiggles it restlessly between his knuckles. As he pulls out his lighter, it catches on his pocket and slips from his grasp.

To his surprise, it doesn't hit the floor. Before him is a beaming smiley thing, holding his lighter in her palm. She offers it but not without a bubbly chirp, "smoking's bad for you."

He eyes her warily. He grunts in gratitude and takes the lighter. He flips it open but before he can light the stogie, she's gone. He looks around. He can't find her.

He sees her again later on. She's eating by herself. The other newbies are all together and chattering on. He doesn't see why she isn't with them. She seemed exactly the type to draw a crowd.

She looks up as if sensing him and waves, another smile. How can she smile when she's all by herself? Then there's a cluster of bubbles where she once was and the smell of lavender wafts over to him. She's gone again.

He hears that bubbling noise again later on. He's on the lawn under a tree, enjoying the shade. He's whetting his claws. The damn things can get dull. Bubbles float around him, this time the smell of cinnamon. And suddenly she's there. She plucks a dandelion and here eyes meet his as she adds it to her cluster.

"Weeds," he says.

"Pretty," she wiggles them at him before she turns to bubbles again, the flowers encased in one big orb as they float away. He tilts his head curiously.

The next time he sees her, he's passing by the east den but then something brings him back. She's scribbling in a notebook in a chair. He stops and leans inside the door frame, watching her.

"Whatcha drawing?" He asks.

She doesn't look up, "weeds." She holds up the sketch of flowers in a wreath. It's well done.

He doesn't know what to say. It's not that anyone ever leaves him speechless, he just doesn't have the energy, but with her, he's not quite sure.

He slowly enters and looks around. He doesn't often share the common spaces. He finds somewhere solitary. Quiet.

"I'm Logan," he says as stands behind another chair. "Bother you if I sit?"

"I know who you are," she smiles again. Here eyes shine like bubbles, translucent as they glow. "You can sit but you can't smoke here." She makes a fist in front of her mouth and coughs, bubbles flow out between her lips. "Everyone calls me Bubbly, if you wanna know."

He lowers himself into the chair and nods. His cheek dimples as he resists a smile of her own.

"Alright, bub," he says as he leans his head back and closes his eyes. He's really not the type to let his guard down but something about her is calming.

"Bub?" She laughs and it sounds like bubbles blowing all at once. "That's cute."

"Cute?" He opens one eye and arches a brow.

"Yes, Mr. Wolverine. Cute," she assures him and puts her pencil back to the paper. "Have you ever seen a real wolverine? They're adorable too."

"They're vicious," he argues.

"They protect the things they love and need," she shrugs. "Even if they keep to themselves."

He narrows his eyes. She better mean those damn critters. She blends with her fingertips and peers up at him.

"Do I have bubbles coming out of my ears again?" She reaches to rub her ear.

He chuckles and shakes his head. The thought of that is silly.

"Nah," he grumbles and closes his eyes again. "Sorry for staring."

"I don't mind so much. People like bubbles, even if they don't like me."

His mood dampens and he wonders, how could anyone not like someone like her?

[toji-bunny-girl]

𝙎𝙖-𝙏𝙤-𝙍𝙪

CHARACTER— yandere!gojo x fem!reader CONTENTS— yandere themes, stalking, hidden camera bear thingy, slight angst? IDKK gojo is just gross asf, noncon, intoxicated!reader, worshipping kink, DELUSIONALL‼️‼️‼️, slight fingering idk, sex yuh A/N— enjoy this masterpiece I wrote months ago (I no longer have the ability to write as good as I did) kinda weird but I literally had this dream a few days ago of a guy kidnapping me and bruising my ass with his initials 💀💀 scary asf and I remembered it hurts like a bitch anyway I have an exam later on so wish me luck 🤩 (repost)

The lustre of his eyes glimmered against the reflection of the screen, his face turning rubicund was evidence of the blood rushing underneath his cheeks. Sweat flecked across his palms, marginally soiling his pants when he rubbed his hands on them.

Your eyes stared straight into his, and he thought your orbs must be of millions of blended colours for them to glint in iridescent. The sliver of rays from the screen pierced his irises, and he swore the sight of you must be cleansing his soul.

He sucked his lips as you played with the toy bunny’s hands, and a smile reached your face before you pressed the soft toy into your chest, clutching it in your arms as you sighed something. Something that started with Sa and ended with Ru. His mind must be playing tricks on him, right? It couldn’t be that—

Then there it comes again, the cadence of your voice, the shape of your lips, and his name that you whispered. Sa-To-Ru.

The Sa whose eyes would only trail behind your wake, the To that breathed just for the air that you exhaled, and the Ru that didn’t believe God lives in heaven, because there was you, his Goddess that walked the Earth amongst the sinful humanity.

Satoru. He thought he had never loved his name even more than that moment.

But he found himself wrong—oh so wrong.

You sounded even more euphonious sprawled out before him, intoxicated with alcohol on your tongue and in your veins—not a clue about where you are and what’s going on. All you could gather was the familiar mop of silver in your foggy sight, and how the world seemed to be on vertigo.

The bits and pieces of recollections you could grasp onto in your besotted state were the hours spent drinking bottles of liquor, giggling at the charming jokes and teases from Gojo. Then the clashes of teeth and his hands on your chest, the long ride up an elevator, and stumbling onto a bed that smelled like him.

“My name…” he panted when his head rose from your jugular—marked and claimed through teeth and tongue. “Say my name,” he repeated, pressing his lips against your jaw as he took in a drag of your ambrosial scent, long fingers pumping in and out of your squeezing cunt.

You frowned, moaning into the torrid air that bubbled around the two of you and arching your back when an orgasm tumbled through, warmth pervading through your core when pleasure glitched over your body like static.

His name doesn’t read past your lips, but your groan of pleasure was enough for him to render him halcyon. Lining his painfully pulsing head to your slick entrance, the dilatory push of his fat tip into your folds made a cry ripple through both of your throats. In you he found warmth that tasted like divinity; the forbidden fruit between the thighs of his Goddess.

He didn’t dare move, afraid that your grip would tempt an orgasm in him to soil your quim with his load. His thumb drew circles upon your clit, trying to mitigate the tight clench of your cunt in the wake of your previous orgasm.

Your muscles finally relaxed in a few rubs, and he let his length ease into you, your hole still pulsing and spasming as his cock filled your insides. Gojo’s chest fluttered with rapture as he groaned for your name, almost as if he was trying to have you look at him, fully sober instead of laying crumpled on his bed.

But you don’t, your eyes remained still shut, and only the little whimpers and cries that fell off the edges of your lips denoted your senses still awake yet torpor from the inebriation.

“Please, look at me?”

You groaned when he benignly lifted your jaw, his sense of deify for you felt through his cold fingertips before his lips meld into yours. Your mouth lax open, letting his tongue taste the heaven off of yours and swallow your saliva of ambrosia down his throat.

When he withdrew from your face with a dense cloud over your heads, he found the hues of your orbs peering into his summer’s blue sky, your eyelashes fanning the heat over his cheeks. His heart jumped and paced, and he was sure you could hear his heartbeat. Could you?

“Satoru…?” you whispered. The tang of liquor blazing strongly in your system, but you still managed to recognise him. “Wha–Where are we? And wha—”

You were cut off from your words when his lips crashed into yours, and his hips began pistoning in and out of you, your moans jumbled between your dancing mouths before sizzling in the hot air. Your walls tightened around his girth as he pumped deep into you, his cock throbbing and threatening ejaculation, but he would rather abnegate himself from pleasure if you hadn’t succumbed to it.

Every stroke of his swollen head against the bump of your g-spot made you gasp and cry with the stimulation, palms desperately attempting to push the weight of the male off, but it simply came to piteous futility.

At his last stroke, your squirting cunt squeezed his cock tight and wet his pelvis, and his load began filling your inside to the brim, thick spurts of cum shooting at your cervix as you screamed his name.

The Sa who you could taste on your tongue, the To who swore you’re the lone fire to his loins, and the Ru who promised to never let your divinity step a single foot out of his door—your temple, to walk the earth soiled by sinning humans.

Satoru—the priest to your Holiness.

[aeragan]

ᴀʀɢᴇɴᴛɪ ɴꜱꜰᴡ ʀᴀᴍʙʟᴇꜱ

✭ pairing(s): argenti x gn reader

✧ a/n: i thought abt him toooooooo much. too much. just some headcanons..... hrghh

🗒 cw: SMUT, gn reader, praise praise praise, body worship, fingering, oral, mention of facesitting, penetration, switch argenti, cumming untouched, mention of overstim, mention of edging, not proofread

✎ wc: 1.1k

MINORS DNI, 18+ ONLY

Love is of the highest devotion to him. Everything he does for you, from simply holding your hands, to sex, it is all an act of devotion from him. You are equals with Idrila in Argenti’s eyes, and he will make sure to cherish you, and make sure you know just how much he adores you.

So it comes to no surprise that sex is a very, very lengthy activity with him. He wants to– needs to– take his time, he needs to love every inch of your body, worship every inch. He ghosts his fingers over every inch of exposed skin, from forehead to chest, from stomach to your waist, and so forth. Every little shiver and sound from you is like a sweet sonnet, it only adds to his mounting arousal.

It takes at least an hour for Argenti to get to the point. He needs to make sure he’s paid attention to every. single. inch. of you. He’ll go over your body with his hands, whispering all sorts of praises, before going over your skin with his lips. Peppering your body in soft, tender, fleeting kisses. If he can get you to cum without any penetration, then that’s perfect, too.

He doesn’t do this to tease you, of course. As stated before, he simply needs you to know how beautiful he believes you are. No matter how much you beg or whine or plead, he will not stop this routine. Sex just feels incomplete without it.

However, once he’s satisfied with his exploration, he follows your every order obediently. Your pleasure is his pleasure, it does not matter if it doesn’t mean any stimulation for him. As long as he gets to hear you moan, feel your touch, he’s happy. So happy.

On that note, one of his favorite things to do is give you oral. He’ll eat you out until you’re crying if you so wish, suck you off until you beg him to stop. Your taste is divine to him, it’s a true reward, and nothing can compare to it. A lifetime in between your thighs sounds lovely, and if he could, he would. When he can, he does his best to look up at you, his beautiful emerald orbs wide, glossy, studying every little detail in your face. There is no sight more enticing than his handsome face, stained by your slick and your cum. 

In fact, Argenti takes such great pleasure in oral, that he tends to cum while giving. Normally, he cums prematurely, enraptured by the sounds you make, the way you taste. Sometimes, you catch him rolling his hips slightly, but other times he is still. Most times he is still fully clothed, there’s a certain pride that bubbles in your chest to know you’ve made him cum untouched.

He loves to finger you or stroke you off, too. His hands, despite being a knight, are very soft. His fingers are long and slender, nails trimmed perfectly. He sits you up on his lap as he starts his ministrations, slow, and hypnotizing. And, of course, he whispers all sorts of saccharine words in your ear. “You’re doing so good”, “You feel so good, my heart…”, “Just once more, hm? Please?”

He will also follow any position you wish. If you want to be on top? Gladly. You want him on top? He’s climbing on top of you with a warm smile. Penetration is one of the highest acts of devotion, he believes. It brings you both closer, metaphorically and physically, and the feeling of his slender cock inside of you never ceases to amaze. Or, the feeling of you within him is enough to make him cum prematurely again.

We’ll get to top Argenti in a bit. When he bottoms, he prefers to ride you. He loves to see you, looking down at you with half-lidded eyes. And Aeons, is the view incredible. His lips parted, his body flush, a blush spread across his cheeks, the tips of his ears, and his shoulders, silky soft hair splayed over his shoulders. It gives him some semblance of control, being able to choose the pace at which he fucks down onto you. However, if you guide him, he doesn’t mind either. Buck your hips up into him, he’ll whimper.

He also likes Missionary when he bottoms and tops, as mentioned previously, he prefers to see you. Hell, a mating press would be just fine to him. Both ways, again. Any way he’d take you, he’d love you to take him. And if you want to ride him, go right ahead! He won’t control the pace, unless you give him permission.

Now, when Argenti tops, he loves missionary and even the mating press. Mirror sex is always on the cards, he will take you any position, as long as he gets to see your beautiful face. But one of his personal favorites is spooning. While he can’t necessarily see your face, it is the closeness that allows him to ignore his own rule. He’ll nuzzle up to your neck, mutter sweet praises, kiss at your skin, and simply enjoy himself. There is no better feeling than his body pressed up against yours, as close as he can possibly be.

He is also vocal! Very, very vocal, but not loud. He moans, whines, whimpers, and even mewls. Doesn’t matter what he’s doing. You could be sitting on his face, and he wouldn’t be able to keep himself from moaning. Little breathy sighs even when he’s feeling you up escape his lips, he’ll moan directly in your ear when he fucks into you, or whine and whimper when you suck him off.

He does exactly as he says he will, and what you allow him to do. Never more, never less. He’s so insanely fair with you, and he lets you be as unfair as you want. Sometimes he can feel a little pent-up and sexually frustrated, but he never asks you for anything, which is… a little unfortunate. He’s good at asking what you want, the communication doesn’t lack there, but he’s very bad at asking about his wants. It’s a guessing game, or more of, he never really has any wants, aside from making you see stars.

Argenti acts like every little service you let him do to you is the most blessed thing. He also has a bad habit of thanking you with every little act you let him do, whether it be eating you out, or you edging him. Going down on you? “Thank you, my love.” running his thumbs over your nipples? Thank you, a million times over, dearest.” Sucking him off to the point of overstimulation? “Thank you, thank you– ngh…– thank you…”

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[ilovetoxicfictionalmen]

REWIND AND PLAY

PART 1

Pairing.| Neil Lewis x fem!reader

Story Summary.| Neil Lewis runs a small, struggling video store, his life playing out like one of the many classic films he rents out to customers, predictable and unremarkable. When his high school crush, you, return to town, Neil sees the opportunity to step out of the background and pursue the love interest he's only dreamed of. As you reconnect, Neil discovers that your life is far from the glossy rom-com he imagined. Behind the scenes, you're battling your own off-screen struggles. In trying to win your heart, Neil realises that the real motive isn't about capturing your attention, but about rewriting his own story, learning to take risks and embrace change, both in love and life.

Chapter Summary.| Neil’s life of routine is thrown out of place as you, the girl of his dreams, appear into Gumshoe on a random Tuesday. But your arrival isn’t as joyful as Neil initially believes, a tragedy had brought you back to your past. Stuck questioning if this is a mere coincidence or a moment of fate, Neil relies on Jonathan to boost his struggling esteem and take the chance he was too afraid to take in high school.

Chapter Warnings.| Angst, family death, insecurity, poor self esteem, unrequited love.

Word count.| 9.3k+

Notes.| And here is the first chapter. Not properly edited because if I did that than I'd never post it. Please, if you want me to continue this let me know by sharing your thoughts. This chapter really is an opening to who Neil is.

i.

Neil believed he lived a satisfying life. 

Well, yes, he never went to college and had no desire to travel the world, let alone step out of his comfort zone. There was no inner drive to ride a white horse in hopes of finding a princess in a tower. Never had he ever wanted to find himself by travelling to a foreign village and taking on an expedition that would give his life a new purpose. 

He didn’t need complexity in his life, he was happy right where he was. His romantic relationships were never designed to be everlasting, just to help pass the time really, to fill the void hidden behind his wide grin. There was this orb rattling inside of him, keeping him on edge of staying committed to someone. But that was fine, he never gave it a second thought, he needed no breathtaking love interest in his life. He had his friends, his store and his movies. That was all he needed to be fulfilled with himself. 

Right? 

Neil Lewis was a man of routine. He enjoyed his life to be similar to a story structure. Everyday had to have a beginning, middle and end. To which he had already planned out with how everything would unfold. His life was best experienced through films, he lived for them. Which was quite contradicting as he never wanted to live a day full of daring excitement, just like the movies. 

The world was a scary place, the future even more frightening. Living a day to day life where he knew what he could keep control of was safer. The expectations were always achievable, the simple satisfaction never dwelling. It was almost as if he wrapped himself in bubble wrap, keeping him safe from dangers of getting his feelings hurt, or even worse, falling in love. 

It was always easier to seek comfort in familiar environments. Over the years, he built a tendency around his routines. Whether it was working or diving into his collection of classic films, he found his solace in routines and escapism through cinema. His love for film showed his desire for a structured in depth narratives where it all clicked together right before the credits rolled. 

A distinct contrast towards his own disordered, unsatisfying life. But he’d refuse to ever see it that way. Because he was happy with where he was, he had all that he ever needed. Unfortunately needs are not always wants. 

Neil’s day began like no other, his slim body spread across the bed, shaggy hair a complete mess as he groaned towards the ringing alarm clock. Smacking it quiet, he crawled out of bed, stretching his stiff limbs as his mind still tried to wake up from his blissful dream. 

He smiled whilst brushing his teeth, humming a tune and grooving his body to the rhythm.Slipping on another oversized cream top, tucking his soft brunette waves behind his ears, he stared at himself in the mirror, failing to realise how effortless he always looked. He brushed aside any sprouting thoughts, balling his fists into his jean pockets as he walked out of his bathroom. He put on his jacket and left for work, right on time. 

There was always a lingering sense of loneliness in Gumshoe. Despite it being his safe place, he couldn’t help but to feel a pang of dread as he unlocked the door. The silence was thick, air still as he stood in the middle of the room. Tucking his hair behind his ears once more, Neil stretched out before rubbing his palms together. The room felt awfully cold this morning. 

But he smiled at his life accomplishment, his sanctuary open for all. Every DVD, tape, magazine, poster and neon sign displayed his passion in a new form. But the congested, overcrowding of it all also showed something he often turned a blind eye to. The disoriented, overwhelming emotions he often ignored. 

The store smelt gritty and weathered, created by a mixture of coffee, popcorn, old leather and cheap cologne. His fingers brushed over the shelves of DVD’s, singing a song to himself as he opened the draw of the empty, old cash register. He unlocked the safe and stuffed in a hundred dollars worth of notes, he never needed much. 

His work day begins like no other, slow. 

The first hour of his shift was always spent taking care of the small tasks, making sure everything looks organised and preparing how he can put together a new promotion to boost some sales. He chucked on ‘The Apartment’ in the DVD player to help pass the time. 

Jonathan came in late, he was always late on Tuesday. It’s not like Neil even needed much help running this joint. He more so just preferred the company, it was always isolated without someone around, with a film on or not. Being able to lounge around and talk about everything cinema related helped the day move forward. 

“Hey! You know if you want customers it’d be smart to flip the sign to open, right?” Jonathan laughed as he flicked the door sign around. 

Neil forgot the simple things. 

“Perhaps I was trying to keep you out” Neil chuckled, and raised his shoulders. 

Jonathan dropped his belongings down behind the counter and stretched. Another day in the office. A couple of regulars came in, and he chatted about their lives. The register cha chinged as he said his polite farewells.

“Want coffee?” He asked, looking around the deserted room. 

“We have coffee here” Neil countered through a chime. 

“I mean real coffee Neil, not that instant bullshit” Jonathan snorted, tapping his fingers on the counter. 

“Yeah, alright, it’s your round isn’t it?” Neil recalled. Neil hummed, pulling a book out from under the counter and searched the page he was last at. 

“Yep, you cheap bastard” Jonathan laughed, heading straight out the door. 

Returning his gaze towards his book, he found peace in the dialogue from the television, his mind drifting off into fantasy once more. 

The door chimed, but his mind was still too invested in his book to process a potential new buying customer yet. The regulars knew their way around. Too many people walked in and asked where the latest blockbuster was. It was irritating with how no one could read the posters, let alone have common sense.

Lifting his head up finally, his eyes peeled open with curiosity. A feminine back pointed in his direction, familiar hands running over the variety of classics. Taking in every different shelf on the path, admiring the posters on the coloured walls. A set of hands he found himself studying all of those years ago. Without realising, his heartbeat increased. Tilting his head and bending his neck in hopes of catching a glance at the customer, had his upper body leaning forward and feet dragging over the flooring. 

A sense of knowing ran through him. A blurred memory appeared behind his eyes. That hair, he’d seen a million times, dreamt of it. Those ears, the width of that neck and length of those exemplary limbs. His thoughts numbed as he wandered towards the enigma of a woman. 

Was this another dream? A figment of his imagination, or just a coincidence towards his past. It began to feel almost like deja vu. His tailing figure went unnoticed. Eventually, he decided to speak to break down his suspicions. To prove to himself that this was another lost woman looking for a Michael Bay film. 

“Welcome to Gumshoe, can I help-” 

As you turned around, that same gentle smile on your lips, his body went into shock and throat clogged up. Stammering out his words, he was completely caught off guard, his heart pounding in his chest like it’s been juiced with drugs. His wide eyes watched you intensely, coming to terms that it really was you. 

You’re older now, obviously, but there’s still that familiar confident look in you. The one that gave him butterflies in his stomach down the school halls. You’re dressed casually, just in beige linen pants and a white sweater. But there's an air of maturity around you now. Not to mention how you were still as beautiful as ever. 

Noticing him quickly, your smile turned more cheeky as you stepped towards him. “Neil Lewis? It’s been a while” you hesitated, but your tone was still full of sureness. 

It’s only been almost seven years. This was never meant to happen, he felt like he’d be dropped into the middle of the battleground. The same girl who had been out of reach, the girl whose name he used to say in his head like a secret, was standing right in front of him, completely focused on him. Never did he think he’d see you again. He tried to remain cool, but the words trip him up, and he’s left stammering. 

“Hey, you…” Neil fumbles, awkwardly waving his hands in your direction. 

Fuck!

“You never left town?” you wondered, tilting your head slightly, acknowledging how time has aged him. 

His tousled hair was still shaggy and grown out. That metabolism of his continued to remain hidden underneath oversized clothing. Those blue eyes still shined in the sunlight it seemed. 

“Uhhhh, yeah no. Someone has to hold down the fort” he laughed it off, crossing his arms over his chest. 

He already felt his skin fluster up, his throat blocked and beads of sweat form. His baggy shirt felt tight around his neck. 

“Well, I’m glad to see it’s you” you replied, a softness in your eyes. “And not someone like Jonathan Drag” you giggled, swaying your left leg around, seemingly anxiously. “Just kidding, you’re probably still friends, right?” You asked. 

“Works here actually” he almost whispered, mouth completely dry. It made you snort at the chances. 

The weight of your history fell heavy on him. As if there was ever really much, but it was both nostalgic and awkward to think about. A massive question mark floated over your head. What were you doing back in town? His volume raised suddenly. 

“What brings you here!” he asked, rubbing his hands together as his body swayed. “I hope you’re not after the latest rom com” he laughed, a bit too excessively. 

“No, no, no” you ensured, your hands tightening around a small worn out journal in your hand. His eyes narrowed at the book, your eyes wandering around nervously. “I went to Media Giant in hopes of finding some films, but you know, they only have the latest rom coms and exploding blockbusters now don’t they?” you bantered.  

“Tell me about it” Neil breathed, smiling at how there was still that mutual understanding between one another. 

“Searched this place up and well, here I am” you explained yourself, admiring the environment around you. “Do you just work here, or?” you trailed. 

“I own it, I own it” he repeated, holding onto some pride, in hopes to get some praise. A complimenting hum rumbled through your throat. 

“I should have known you’d be here, you always were a nerd” you winked. 

“The term is geek” he countered, leaning himself back up against the bench. “Well, actually it's cinephile. But I’ll settle for a geek” he nodded, a soft smile on his lips. 

“Okay, geek” you settled, that sparkle still in your eyes. 

The silence grew loud, Neil knew that’d he’d lose himself in your eyes still after all of these years. He had to say something before his thoughts spoke louder than words. 

“How long have you been in town for?”

“Just over a week” you replied, your tone dropping slightly, eyes narrowing a bit more and smile fading. 

“Oh rad! You enjoying it?” Neil asked, oblivious to your facial hints. Still in a state of awe that you’d come home. 

“No, honestly” you answered suddenly and blankly, before you could even think. 

“Oh-”

“Sorry, I'm making everything so negative” you apologised instantly, only now realising your words. “It’s just that my dad passed away recently and I’m staying in town until I sort out his belongings and sell the house. It’s all under my name now” you explained yourself. 

There was a look of dread on you, from this extra weight sitting on your back. You were a single child, with little family from your father’s side. Neil’s heart fell despite your expression looking unphased of the major passing in your life. 

“I’m so sorry-” 

Immediately, you dismissed his condolences with a wave of your hand, your features sterning. “No, we weren’t even close, remember?” you assured, dipping your toes into your past together. Staring into his wide eyes, you blinked and reflected from those many years ago. “Sorry, it’s been like seven years of course you don’t-” 

“I remember you saying it- Briefly” Neil cutted in, as he lowered his voice at the end.

Your words hurt, not that they were meant with cruel intention. The reminder that you were never that close hurt. A feeling that had numbed over the years. 

But he always couldn’t forget the pain he felt when he passed you and your father after school once. He was shouting at you on the porch, pointing his finger in your face. Silently, he walked with you for hours. He kept you company as the night grew cold. You hugged him tightly and only said one thing, “I fucking hate him”.

“It’s okay. My mom came for the funeral, and now it’s just me” you pointed out, the awkwardness growing on your tongue. Your hands rubbing against one another. 

“So, what brings you here exactly?” Neil changed the subject, the negative tone of conversation feeling intimidating after seeing you again from so long. 

“Right, of course” you nodded. “I was going through his stuff and found this” you wave the worn out journal. “I remember him always watching an old film, as a kid I was bored out of my mind. I only wanted to watch cartoons but had no other choice. If his movie was on, well I wouldn’t get a word out of him until it was over” you told him, a mixture of happiness and sadness in your eyes. 

Neil nodded, all ears. 

“He was a little movie critic, it seems. Kept track on what films he watched, left notes and what not. He only had a handful at home, I’ve watched them all already. But there’s like hundreds in here and I just want to, I don’t know. Never understood them, thought maybe I could now” you explained, unsure with your own words if your intentions made sense. 

“Oh, wow that’s cool, well he must have had great taste! I’m sure I’ve had at least a dozen films in here, just let me know what you wanna watch” he replied, eager to help you up. 

“Can you help me Neil?” you asked, unsurely. 

“Of course” Neil breathed, leaning closer to you. “Do you mind?” he said softly, his hand unsure if it was reaching out for you or the book. 

His fingertips brushed over your hand as he grabbed the book. The sparks of electricity spiked down his skin, his Adam's apple bobbed. Opening the book, he read through the small pages full of black ink. A gentle smile on his lips as he read the opinions your father had. 

“How about, ‘What Ever Happened To Baby Jane?’, hey?” Neil decided after flicking through a couple of pages. 

“Sounds great” you agreed. 

You followed him to the correct aisle, he truly knew this place inside out. Pulling out the tape, he tapped the cover a couple of times as he bee lined towards the counter. Placing the journal flat onto the counter and tapped his fingers over the tape. 

“You got a VCR?” Neil asked, earning a nod from you. “It’s just four dollars” he mumbled, turning red that he’s even charging you. 

You slipped out a five dollar bill from your purse and waved it in his direction. “Keep the change” you smirked. Smiling foolishly, he slid the crinkled note into the draw and pushed it shut. 

“I just need your ID or credit card to sign you up for a membership- Oh, nevermind, I trust you’ll bring it back” Neil stopped himself, an urge to look cool in front of you. Your smirk grew with mischief as you took the tape from his hands without permission. 

“I don’t know Neil, I might have a high bid for this classic. You know how much these go for these days?” you hummed, your tongue rolling between your lips. 

He felt his chest tighten, those teenage hormones of his waking up from a long slumber. A sudden wave of confidence washed over him, he dropped his weight onto his elbows, leaning forward. 

“Ah, well I better warn you that I have men lurking around these activities. I own this town now, and these films, they’re purely addictive and exhilarating. I’ll know if my products are being distributed under my nose and well, there are prices to be paid for it” he spoke slowly, his eyes daring you to make a risky move. 

You hummed, leaning closer towards him, your eyes scanning around his features. Neil wasn’t breathing, but he didn’t care as he watched your daring eyes. 

“Well, guess we’ll find out tomorrow” you whispered, drawing your lips close to his. 

Suddenly, you fell back onto your heels and spun towards the door. Neil watched stunned as you headed towards the exit. 

“See you then geek!” you called out, the bell ringing as you departed Gumshoe. 

Were you two just flirting? 

He hurried to the door, pressing his hands next to his head as he watched you walk down the pathway. Jonathan walked past you, two cups of coffee in his hands. As you waved towards him, he smirked but gave you a double look as you passed him. 

Neil stepped back and heaved, keeping his hands on his hips as he had no words in his mouth. Entering the store, Jonathan had a shocked look on him.

“Holy shit! Was that who I think it was?” Jonathan gasped, looking out the window one last time. 

“It was” Neil said breathlessly, still in shock over the encounter. 

“What is she doing back in town?” He questioned curiously. 

“U-uh… Her dad passed away so she’s just-” he murmured, his mind playing over your encounter together. 

“Shit, are you okay? You always had a huge crush on her” Jonathan recalled, a growing smug smirk on his lips. 

“Yeah, yeah… I’m fine, just uh, don’t worry about coming in tomorrow, I’ll do it” Neil ordered suddenly, nodding his head as he decided with his thoughts. He couldn’t risk not seeing you, couldn’t risk having others around when he did see you. 

Jonathan frowned and stepped closer towards him. 

“What? You have the first half, you wanna swap?” Jonathan asked, completely confused. Instantly Neil waved his hands in the air. 

“Nah, nah. I’ll do both, don’t worry. I’ll still pay you” he bargained, avoiding eye contact with Jonathan. 

Jonathan sighed his name as he handed him his coffee. Neil gracefully took the hot drink, took a large gulp despite the temperature of it and suddenly started reorganising the tapes in front of him. Jonathan shook his hand and waved his hand in Neil’s face, which went ignored. 

“Neil!” Jonathan shouted. 

“Yeah, what?” Neil frowned, looking over towards him. 

“What did she say to you?” Jonathan narrowed his eyes. 

“Nothing, nothing” Neil reassured, laughing a bit too awkwardly afterwards. 

You never said anything out of the ordinary. It was always just the feelings that came as baggage with it. The way your words lingered in his mind, the picture of your smile on the projector inside his head. You were still as perfect as he remembered. 

“Are you sure? You’re turning into a human tomato, and that’s one hell of a bulge” Jonathan pointed out, wiggling his brows, his eyes below Neil’s waist.

Dropping his head down, Neil cursed and covered his unexpected friend. Now he truly turned beet red. 

“Oh, piss off Jonathan!” Neil waved Jonathan away. 

Jonathan snorted and plopped himself onto the comfy couch, relaxing his body as he sipped his drink. As Neil walked back to the counter, he picked up your father’s journal, his eyes widening. Had you forgotten to ask for it back? Or was it a promise that you would come back tomorrow, your unique version of a video tape deposit. 

ii. 

Neil left early that day, coming up with a silly excuse to get Lucien to watch until close. There was no real reason to leave Gumshoe, Neil just couldn’t think about anything and it was driving him insane. His friends' booming voices started to hurt his ears. He wasn’t even sure what he wanted to think about, whether it was about you, or not? You were on his mind the whole day, yet you weren’t. By the time the afternoon came, it was deep in his skin. Everything that he had felt for you in the past was resurfacing like a toothache. 

Chugging down an over-expensive, sugary so called sports drink, Neil found himself standing outside of the local gym. What was this sudden desire to impress you? Had it been how you aged so beautifully yet he stayed the same, or even worse. Thoughts about how he never did put on muscle mass floated in his mind. You always had a buff boy following behind you. Dated the baseball star throughout almost all of senior year too…

Wanna go gym? - Neil, 6:33pm

The fuck? - Jonathan, 6:34pm

As Neil began typing, he hummed and fiddled with his thumbs. His lower lip trapped between his nervous teeth. 

You know, to workout or what not. - Neil, 6:34pm

And where has this sudden desire stemmed from? - Jonathan, 6:35pm

Is that a no? - Neil, 6:35pm

Yep - Jonathan, 6:35pm

The receptionist easily persuaded him to buy a membership, his mind still bewildered by your arrival. By the time he signed the papers and handed over his credit card, his body was pumping with caffeine, pins prickling under his skin. 

Walking into the wide, open, body odour stenched room, Neil suddenly felt like a mouse amongst lions. All of these large stones of mass pushed and pulled against heavy weights. Booming voices echoing all around him. Fit people doing a marathon on the treadmills. No one was even staring at him, but he felt completely nude. 

“Shit” Neil whispered, his throat dry. 

Standing there like an idiot for what felt like hours, Neil turned his heel and walked straight out of the gym, the sun now setting. He’d have to convince Jonathan or someone to go with him another day. So he couldn’t make more of an imbecile out of himself. Or maybe he could start running again, or actually show up to softball practice.      

That night was sleepless for him. Neil laid for hours, staring blankly at his ceiling as his buried thoughts came to life. He feared that he had already boarded the train of doom. All he’d do is get his hopes up, like he always did in high school. 

The lamp lit up, Neil exhaled as he picked up your father’s journal. Why did he even take this home with him? A part of him felt like a thief, a bigger part of him just felt confused and desperate for closure of his own. Not that he was even sure how he’d gain some kind of closure, hopefully just a bit more understanding of your father so he could help you. Like you wanted more help than movie recommendations. 

All of these films' brief analysis’ were similar to Neil’s. He’d compliment the cinematography, acting and plot twists almost the same way Neil would. But it was the personal reflections for some of these that made Neil uneased with his own ways of life. 

The Graduate - 1967, directed by Mike Nichols

Maybe I waited too long. Sometimes you think you have all the time in the world, and then, just like that, it’s gone. I don’t want to end up like Benjamin, fumbling through life with regrets.

The Killers - 1946, directed by Robert Siodmak

I’ve always thought it was too late, that some things are just meant to stay in the past. But maybe I’m wrong. Maybe this is the moment I’ve been waiting for, even if I don’t feel ready for it.

Rear Window - 1954, directed by Alfred Hitchcock

I’ve spent so long watching life from the sidelines. It’s easier to stay in the comfort of my own home, to observe without getting involved. But maybe that’s the problem. What if I’m just too afraid to be part of the story?

Neil slammed the journal shut, a few of the entries felt a bit too relatable, almost like a call out. The connection was a bit too strong to your father, this wasn’t what he was expecting at all. Gently placing it back onto the bedside table, the light clicked off and Neil laid silently once more. Eventually, he fell into a dreamless slumber that lingered on for what felt like weeks. 

The next day at Gumshoe was dreadfully slow and tortuous. By the time the clock ticked over to six, Neil felt his stomach drop. He wasn’t sure why he believed you’d float in as soon as he flipped the sign to open. Every time someone walked past his shoulders raised, quickly to slouch again. 

Jonathan and Lucien still came that day, despite Neil’s desperate pleas to stay away. Looking at his watch, Jonathan craned his neck back from the couch over to Neil, who still patiently waited by the counter. Neil wore one of his better, more tightly fit shirts today. Jonathan could have sworn there was a bit of gel in his hair. 

“Last hour Neil! What are the odds now Lucien?” Jonathan hummed. 

“Four to one, not in your favour Neil” Lucien stated, not removing his gaze from the screen. 

“Ah cram your odds up your asses” Neil muttered, his fingers tracing over the journal once more. 

As the clock drew closer to closing time, Neil lost all hope and fell onto the couch between his friends. At least ‘Nightmare Alley’ could ease his sorrows, to a degree. He laid his head back, his mind turning numb from the dialogue echoing through the store. 

The door silently opened, the bell unhearable over Lucien’s booming commentary. You walked in silently, tape in your hand as you approached them. “What are we watching?” you asked, leaning on the back of the couch, over Neil’s head.

His eyes widened, mouth fell open as he zipped onto his feet. Tugging down on his shirt, he smiled at you foolishly. “Hey! You made it, h-how was the film?” he spat out, his mouth running too quick for his brain to decide. “I mean, you weren’t able to sell it, hey?” Neil hummed, rubbing his hand over his chin as he tried to act cool. 

“My bidder pulled out last minute, he seemed horrified over the phone” you winked. You looked down to his friends, staring wide eyed at you. Waving towards them, they repaid the gesture. “No, it was intense. Baby Jane’s jealousy just consumed her, and you could feel how suffocating their relationship became. By the end, you realize it’s not just about who’s right or wrong, but how holding onto bitterness can tear you apart. Sometimes, when you don’t speak up, you wait too long—wondering if it’s already too late. You let things fester, thinking they’ll work themselves out, but they never do. Maybe we all end up like that... waiting for someone to notice, but never quite being seen” you explained, your mind drifting elsewhere momentarily. 

The contentment in Neil bubbled up. How could a film review sound so damn attractive? Even Jonathan and Lucien seemed invested in your insights. 

“Yeah, you end up holding onto things so long, you forget what it feels like to let them go. But I guess, by then, it’s hard to tell if you’re waiting for something... or just too afraid to make a move” Neil added on, walking behind the couch, closer to you. 

“Great point” you smiled. 

The eye contact felt compelling, Neil’s mouth ajar open as he admired your features once more. Breaking the moment, you held up the tape. Reluctantly, he took it and walked behind the counter. 

“You wanna rent another?” He asked softly. 

“I do, but I was actually on my way to Frankie’s Bar. Always wanted to go to school but you know, legal requirements” you made known, tapping your fingers on the wooden counter. 

“Oh, yeah that place is cool” Neil grinned, obvious to any potential hints. Jonathan and Lucien looked towards one another. 

“You close soon right?” you asked, your eyes looking up to the clock. 

“Yeah gotta lock the doors before everyone floods in” Neil snorted, gazing out to the empty street. 

Your mouth formed in ‘o’ shape as you leaned closer towards him, your hands firmly rested on the counter. Looking back towards his friends briefly, you smiled at him once more, gently, kindly. 

“Are you doing anything afterwards?” you asked subtly. 

Neil blinked, the adrenaline kick starting inside of him. Clawing his fingers on the wooden surface as some form of decision making, his eyes nervously darted to his friends, who stared with narrow eyes. 

“Uh-um, yeah we’re just gonna have an Indiana Jones marathon actually. We’ve been waiting for it all week” Neil laughed softly, pulling on his collar nervously. 

Jonathan and Lucien’s eyes widened with shock and disappointment. 

“Oh cool” you nodded, slightly stunned. 

Neil hesitated, wondering if taking it back was the smart decision. But the longer he thought over it, the deeper he dug his grave. The joy in your expression seemed to decrease. 

“You’re welcome to stay if you want” he tried to counter, scratching the back of his neck anxiously. 

“Oh no it’s algood, I’m seeing some school friends. I better be off, but I’ll drop by for another film. Take care of that journal for me, yeah?” you told him, pointing your finger in his direction as you headed towards the door. 

“Of course” he breathed, stunned and defeated. 

He’d waited all day for this, only for it to be a two minute conversation. All due to his shy mentality. He wanted to not overthink about his mess up, but he was always tumbling down the hill. You farewelled them all, and then you were gone. Immediately, Jonathan tossed a pillow at Neil. The soft object collided with his chest. 

“You fucking idiot!” Jonathan insulted, his anger showing through his red face. 

“What!” Neil shouted defensively, raising his hands in surrender. 

“She just fucking asked you out!” he continued on, standing up from the couch. 

“No she didn’t!” Neil denied, skin trembling from the possible truth. 

Even though the intentions were as clear as a glass window, Neil could always find a way to second guess things. Sometimes Neil wondered if he liked to be in denial to avoid complete dissatisfaction. Chance was a scary tool, he hated experimenting with possibilities that he couldn’t grasp onto. He had an inability to walk on an imaginary tightrope. 

“Yes she did you imbecile!” Lucien chimed in, shaking his head with a pout. 

“She’s meeting up with friends!” Neil extended his arms, expression completely flustered. Desperately trying to hold onto your words as a line of defense. 

“Yeah to cover up your rejection!” Jonathan hissed. 

“Oh shit! I don’t know! I just got scared! She said she was seeing friends, half of them were bullies!” Neil explained himself, feeling completely overwhelmed with himself. 

“Run out there and beg her to go out with you” Jonathan ordered, pointing his finger towards the door. 

“No, hell no” Neil shook his head quickly. 

“What’s the worst that could happen? Just say hey, I've been in love with you ever since high school and time is running out, so let’s get together and make cute babies” Lucien chuckled, shrugging his shoulders after Neil frowned at him.  

“I can’t tell her that, she’ll think I’m a creep” Neil huffed. 

“Oh no shit Neil!” Jonathan spat, throwing another pillow at him. 

Neil caught the pillow, and dropped his head as he walked back towards the couch. Dropping his body in shame, he held his head in the pillow. Jonathan patted his shoulder, slowly and harshly. 

“It’s alright, when she comes in tomorrow, ask to follow up on the bar” Lucien instructed, nodding at his friend. 

Nodding his head in agreement, Neil would redeem himself tomorrow. His chances felt like a cat with nine lives, actually eight now. 

iii.

You didn’t come in the next day. Or the day after that for a matter of fact. 

Neil was so hopeful you would, certain is the word he’d use. Did he upset you or embarrassed you in front of his friends? No, he wasn’t even worth that much. Which only made things worse, reminding himself of how little you actually meant to him. His only purpose was renting out movies to you. 

His hands traced over the journal as he sat on the couch, his mind doubtful as his friends talked around him. Every now and again he’d give a plain response, his mind miles away from his surroundings. They knew he was waiting for you, silently begging for you to walk through the door. There was nothing that could be done besides having patience. 

But through his doubtful mind, Neil had no more left in the tank. Maybe he’d just drop it off in your dad’s mailbox, he still remembered the way there. It wasn’t that far by foot, Neil could use the steps anyways. Even though Neil was blessed with a fast metabolism, lounging on a couch all day wasn’t good for his health. After debating forever in his mind, he nodded to himself. 

“Hey, are you able to watch over for like an hour? I gotta go do something” Neil asked, sliding the book into his jean pocket. 

“Yeah, sure” Jonathan answered, his mind invested in the film. 

As he walked out of the store, he tried to keep his shoulders high. It was for the better, he told himself. All he had been doing for the past few days was obsessing over you. Over the memory of you. He needed to let go of this idea of you, the one that was always a clear fantasy. No matter how badly he wanted to be, he wasn’t the man for you. You needed someone strong, manly, protective of you. Hell, you call him a nerd. He clearly wasn’t worthy of you. 

Neil walked down the familiar streets, tapping his fingers on the book as the cement trees and bushes turned into a suburbian view. His mind wandered back to high school, recalling almost exact conversations between you both as you walked these streets. All of the times that he appreciated the silence, gently admiring you as you hummed a melody.  

Standing out front of your father’s house, he sighed, looking at the journal once more, and debated if he really wanted to say farewell to you. Without ever saying it once more. The dark cloud rained over his thoughts once more. Swallowing hard, he slid it through the thin metal door, Neil slumped his shoulders and spun on his foot. Hurrying away defeated, the front door opened behind him. 

“Neil!” You called, jolting down the steps as you closed in on him. He spun around, his eyes wide as if he’d been caught red handed. “What are you doing here?” you wondered, smiling softly as he hesitantly stepped back towards you. 

“Oh, um- I was just…” he fumbled, nervously gripping onto his fingers. “I just put your dad’s journal in the mailbox, thought maybe you’d want it back” he admitted eventually, cheeks red and throat tight. 

“Oh, thanks?” you furrowed your brows together. 

“Sorry, I wasn’t expecting you to be home” he explained, scratching his head.

“Don’t be sorry. I was just heading out, to you, well Gumshoe, but yeah” you said, a slight tone of awkwardness in your voice. 

“You’re kidding” Neil mumbled, his shoulders dropping in a mixture of negative emotions. “Let me get it out” he whispered, stepping towards the mailbox.

He hissed as the one sided door got in the way of his fingers. Tapping on the papers, he tried his hardest to slide the book closer towards him. You watched, amused as you wandered towards the back of the mailbox. 

“Neil, most people pick their mail out from the back door” you informed, the metal door creaked open. 

“Right” he smiled, retrieving his caught fingers. 

“You must be off today then” you stated, holding onto the book tightly. 

“No, uh- yes. Well…” he murmured, mind racing to come up with a reasonable excuse. “I was just running a few errands in between work and thought I’d add you in” he nodded slowly, hoping you’d bite the bait. 

“Are you heading back there now?” you asked gently, your expression reassured him. 

“Yeah” he said softly. 

“Can I walk with you?” 

“Of course” Neil smiled gently, his mind finally relaxing from the overbearing thoughts.

The walk was quiet for most of the way, some small talk here and there. Just like how it was back in high school. Neil never minded, he just liked being in your presence, and it always seemed to be the only option he got to be around you. Yeah, you guys sat next to one another in Philosophy, but you had everyone wanting your attention, and he never knew how to stand out. 

“I saw your commercial on the television” you broke the calm silence. Neil chuckled out softly. 

“Oh, really? Ahaha yeah well I wanted to promote the business through a way that I love. And to you know, show what I provide. I had a lot of fun making it” he talked, a gleeful smile locked in. 

“You’re a good actor, why did you never get into it?” you questioned, smiling towards the strangers passing. 

“Get into what?” Neil looked over at you. 

“Making films, acting, any of it. You’ve got a creative mind, don’t you?” You clarified. 

“Oh, honestly. I’ve just always preferred being on the sidelines, I suppose. I’m happy where I am” he answered, a neutral tone on his tongue.

Neil wasn’t sure if he was trying to tell you that, or himself. The words just sounded skeptical off of his tongue. A few seconds later he felt embarrassed over how he perceived himself. 

“Fair, but sometimes it’s good to be the main character, you know?” you mentioned confidently. Neil was silent as he processed your words. You looked towards him, seeing the gears of his mind turning through his eyes. “Do people ask for your signature often?” you shifted convo, a sly smirk on your lips. 

“Yeah, you’re actually the first person not to ask for it, it’s a relief really” Neil laughed, rolling his shoulders back. 

“Don’t jump the gun, I just don’t have a pen on me” you chuckled, playfully smacking his shoulder. 

Laughing quietly besides one another, Neil wondered about your career. 

“Did you ever finish studying law?” he asked politely. 

“Of course” you replied immediately, but the tone was completely drained from your lips. It sounded robotic almost, your eyes blank as you stared ahead of you. “Is Rosie Pratt still in town?” you suddenly asked. 

It caught him off guard. There was no relevance to the conversation. Looking towards you, he noticed your jaw clenched and hands almost shaking. 

“Uh, no. I don’t think so” Neil said slowly. 

You were ignoring it and Neil couldn’t help but to wonder why. You were such an enigma, Neil wanted to crack you open, but worried you’d break completely if you did. 

Opening the door for you, the pair of you walked into Gumshoe. A cheeky smirk grew on Jonathan’s lips as Neil migrated proudly towards the back of the store. Waving to one another, you stood behind the couch, observing the closing scene of ‘Fargo’. Neil stood close behind you, admiring the length and colour of your loose hair.

“How was your Indy marathon?” you asked suddenly.

Their non-existent marathon you mean. 

“It was great, right guys?” Neil gulped, eyes darting from one friend to the other. 

“Yeah terrific” Lucien was first to respond. 

“Harrison Ford” Jonathan added, accompanied by the ok hand sign. 

“He is a charming man isn’t he” you admired, looking back towards Neil. He stared at you, still in a trance of your beauty “Anyways, what do you think is next on my to-watch-list?” you mentioned, holding out the journal towards him. 

“Uh, lets see” Neil bit his lip as he flicked to a random page. 

What if I’m just too afraid to be part of the story?

He blinked heavily, the words echoed through his head, his heart racing as he slowly looked up to your gentle gaze. Clearing his throat, his thumb ran over the words that echoed through his mind. 

“Rear Window is one of Hitchcock’s best works in my opinion” Neil stated.

“Oh, that’s the one with Grace Kelly right?” you wondered, leaning closer to Neil ever so slightly. 

The butterflies in his heart fluttered at your words. When was the last time he went out with a girl that actually cared to remember an actresses’ name? He’d have to objective them for his ex’s to figure them out. Your knowledge was so damn attractive. 

“Oh, Grace Kelly, mhm” Jonathan groaned, closing his eyes as he visualised her. 

“Are you a fan of hers?” you smirked, looking back at him. 

“Who isn't?” he snorted. 

“You wanna watch it?” you asked, catching everyone off guard. 

“What? I mean, um pardon?” Jonathan snapped his head towards you.  

Your hand gestured to the television, the credits rolling and then all eyes were on you. Looking over to Neil, you smiled softly. “I mean, if it’s alright with you of course” you added on, a look of hope in your eyes. 

“Yeah, of course” Neil nodded quickly. Hurrying over to the correct shelf, he quickly found the tape and grabbed it with his shaking hands, then beelined back towards the group. “Lucien, chuck it on will you?” Neil tossed the tape towards him. 

Catching it with wide eyes, Lucien frowned towards him. It was a bit of an impulsive act. The only reason for Neil throwing it to him was for him to vacate the other couch. He couldn’t afford to be cockblocked by his friends. 

“Yes, your majesty” Lucien sighed, following his order. 

Understanding his motives, he moved over next to Jonathan. Letting you lead, Neil sat down beside you, your thighs a few inches apart. Trying to relax, he looked over to you, who gently stared at the screen. Jonathan’s eyes were on him, Neil’s cheeks flustered red. 

Focusing his attention onto the screen, Neil finally relaxed. He always loved the opening sequence of this film. It establishes the setting, themes, characters and mood of the film perfectly through subtlety. The set and camera angles complete the voyeurism idea precisely.  

So deep into his analysis, Neil failed to notice you lean in towards him. 

“Hey, do you remember when I said we should watch a movie together sometime?” you whispered into his ear. 

Snapping his head towards you, Neil blinked slowly. Of course he remembered, how could he ever forget that night?

“Of course” he murmured, the memory playing over in his mind.

“Can’t believe it took us seven years” you chuckled, leaning back and returning your gaze to the screen. The pause from Neil went unnoticed by you. His eyes widened with intense thought and his mouth went dry. 

“Anyone hungry?” Jonathan looked at the time.

It was just after one. The movie had only been on for twenty minutes. It was obvious how badly Jonathan was scheming, but Neil had no reaction to it. Nudging Lucien’s ribs, his eyes peeled behind the glasses. 

“I could eat” Lucien huffed, rubbing his sore bones. 

Jonathan jumped to his feet, a cheeky smirk on his lips as he looked over towards Neil. But he ignored it, his throat tightening at the thought of being alone with you. All piling inside his overthinking mind. 

“Let’s go get some Burger King or something, don’t worry we’ll bring it back” Jonathan mused, patting Neil firmly on the shoulder as they walked out. 

It all went over your head, you waved bye and got comfy. As the movie played on the screen, that memory still played on in his mind. 

“Maybe we could watch a movie or something sometime?”

It echoed and echoed through his shaking mind. Neil wondered how you said that so easily. Worried how little that night meant to you, how badly he misinterpreted things. He stared blankly at the screen, his mind projecting his memories as he wondered why you brought that up.The dialogue travelled through his numb ears, his thoughts falling years back in time. 

Now, Neil wasn’t sure how he ended up in this situation. It felt like a fairy had finally granted his wishes. When you approached Neil out of nowhere and told him to follow you, his heart skipped a beat. But regardless, he followed you, he’d follow you anywhere. 

Neither of you felt in place at this party. Retreating to a quieter, more private space, you found an empty bedroom and nodded your head to yourself. Finally alone together, the atmosphere was much different than ever before. Something felt distinct, the stakes were raised, the possibilities at its greatest chance. All of the noise and chaos is gone, the rawness settled on Neil’s skin.

You sat on the window seat, the party in clear view of your wandering eyes, observing your raging classmates. The grass was full of drunk teenagers who thought they were ready to be adults. Neil sat at a respectful distance, on the bed, his sweating hands on his red cup, full of brown liquor as he watched over you. 

It started with small talk, like most encounters around Neil did. However he always appreciated the small talk with you. But then, your eagerness to drop the polite facade you always had around one another happened. 

“I can’t wait to get out of here, you know?” you spoke truthfully. 

Neil’s eyes widened. 

“What?” 

“To leave town, don’t you just hate it here?” you questioned, looking over the stars. 

“Uh, yeah… I suppose I do” Neil answered weakly. 

He wasn’t even sure where he wanted to go to college yet, or if he even was capable of it. It was a possibility he’d been ignoring, his parents never questioned him so he had no pressure on his back. Sometimes he wished he did, just to have that expectation in him that he could never find himself. 

“You know, it’s just life on repeat here. I’m sick of living up to expectations, I’m ready to drop my mask and live for me. I want to thrive, live an adventure. Don’t you Neil?” you asked, enthusiasm gaining in your voice as you visualise a better future.

“Of course” Neil lied, his nervous eyes hidden in the dark. “You’ll be closer to your mom, right?” he added, trying to focus on anything other than his future. 

“Yeah but, I doubt I’ll see her much though. That’s what happens when you start a family with someone else, your first one fades away” you explained, your warmth decreased. You looked down towards your knees. “Frank is kind, Charlie is bloody cute. But you know, the only love she can show me is through an expensive bill. I’d rather get a decent call from her. But they’re coming for grad, that’s the main thing” you spoke of, trying to end on a positive note. 

The room had completely shifted. The vulnerability was clear through the darkness. Neil cleared his throat, his thoughts demanding to be shown light. 

“I’m surprised you’re talking to me, if I’m being honest” Neil brought up. 

The next day Neil would regret how much alcohol he consumed. It always knew how to bring your raw emotions to the surface. The thought had been consuming for months now, not that you were ever close friends, but there was always a visible distance at times. 

“What do you mean? We talk all the time” you asked confusedly, leaning closer towards him. 

“I always feel invisible when you’re dating someone” he stated, sadness stained on his tongue. 

Your eyes soften, shoulders drop as you read his body language in the moonlight. You struggled to find words to use. 

“I’m sorry Neil, it’s been an intense year. I didn’t-” 

“It’s okay, I understand” he assured, waving his hand towards you. 

A heavy beat. 

“I do like talking to you, you know?” you pointed out. 

A sense of relief waved over him, his mouth ajar open as he stared at you. 

“I like talking to you too” Neil replied, sincerely. 

“My dad’s just been my back about my… choices. And well Evan, he’s certainly consuming. Sometimes I wish I steered clear from him” you spoke truthfully, turning your head back at the window, noticing him instantly. 

His body tensed at that name. The anger inside of him pulled on its chains. You looked down to his broad, tall physique. His voice echoed through the window, speaking nonsense, as per usual. 

“Yeah, Evan is quite the guy” Neil huffed lightly. 

You noticed the tone, but chose not to address it. However, you returned your sight towards him, and let your thoughts go loud in the silent room. There’s a moment of quiet where both of you realise how much time had passed since you last really talked like this. The air between you was thick with unspoken feelings, and the chemistry is undeniable. There’s a soft vulnerability between you now, a shared understanding of how you’ve both been holding back in different ways.

“Have you ever been kissed before Neil?” you wondered. 

His heartbeat quickened, a bead of sweat rolled down his nervous skin. 

“Yeah of course, plenty of times” Neil lied, nervously rubbing his fingers over his red cup. Cocking an eyebrow towards him, you tilted your head forward. 

“Have you?” you asked more sternly. 

“Yeah, but it was by Evie Brown so I like to pretend that it doesn’t count” Neil confessed easily. 

“She always did have a peculiar interest in you, didn’t she?” you giggled.

Neil exhaled and dismissed your observation through waving his hand. Looking back outside, you shook your head softly towards the affairs happening outside. A broad hand around a petite shoulder that shouldn’t be. Turning your head slowly to Neil for the last time, you wondered briefly. 

“Come here” you motioned your hand towards you, returning your sight to Neil, who’s eyes had never left you.

Standing up on his shaking legs, Neil approached you silently, finishing his heavy drink. Sitting next to you, his thin physique went rigid as he tried to focus on his breathing. A thousand thoughts streamed through his conflicted mind. 

“Don’t be so stiff” you laughed, playfully smacking the back of his shoulder. 

Neil laughed softly, his shoulders rolling forward. The silence was peaceful, reassuring, empowering. All of his worries eased as he looked at you. He whispered your name. 

“Yes Neil?” you replied. 

After he took a deep breath, he finally spoke his truth. 

“You deserve better than Evan. Like, I know he’s probably going to play for the MLB, have a mansion with a fucking petting zoo out the back-”

“A petting zoo? Really?” you snickered.  

“Yeah! I mean, I don’t know. He’ll have something completely unnecessary. But, you deserve better than that” Neil stated, locking eyes with you. Your faces only a few inches apart, he could smell the vodka on your tongue. 

“Oh yeah, like what Neil?” you asked slowly, inching closer towards him. 

“Like, like… Like…” he stammered.  

His nerves raised as you attracted towards him, like a magnet. What was he doing, he didn’t even deserve you. This wasn’t a movie where the protagonist swooned the love interest. This was real life, and you were out of his league. His body slouched in worry. 

“You just deserve better than him, someone that respects and adores you for who you are. Not who they want you to be” he voiced, finally. 

Even though a massive rock was lifted from his back, his body remained tense. You blunk a couple of times, processing his raw words. 

“Thanks Neil, I really appreciate that” you whispered, a weak smile on your lips. 

You lean close to one another, neither of you wanting to break the silence. The suspense is palpable, his heart begging him to close the distance. Neil moved a little closer, you didn’t pull away. The words of your eyes speaking confessions to one another. You both know what’s meant to happen, but there’s some barrier in the way. 

Neil brushed a strain of your hair behind your ear, completely admiring your beauty. For a moment, time slowed down completely. You were his best sight, greater than any other film he’d seen. Neil leaned in, so close he felt your breath on his trembling lips. But just before glory, your name echoed down the hall. 

You pulled back, looking down to the backyard, Evan out of vision. The reality of it all crashed down on you both, the party, the people, the timing. You sit there silent for a moment, gathering your drunken thoughts and vulnerabilities. The tension lingers in the air, the sound of Neil’s heavy breathing fills the room. The unsureness of how to handle this weight pressed on your shoulders. 

Your name echoed again, much closer this time. The clock was ticking, you had to be quick. 

“I should go, it was nice talking to you. We’ll do it more often” you appreciated, standing up and hurrying to the door. 

Neil was breathless, the darkness of the room hiding his raw expression. He wanted to stride towards you, to seal the deal. But he sat there defeated instead. Your hand held onto the knob, but you turned back towards him.

“Maybe we could watch a movie or something sometime?” you offered, smiling gently. 

“Yeah, yeah! I’d love that…” Neil stammered out, leaning closer towards you. 

“See you around Neil” you farewelled, sneaking out of the room. 

The light shined for a second, then the darkness washed over him once more. His mind was shaken, the shouts outside muffled as he felt the moment hang in the air around him. Too conflicting thoughts consumed him, he was proud that he finally spoke his mind. But feared it was too late. A weak smile grew on his lips, tomorrow would be a new day. 

But he never did see you around, not like he did that night. Right after graduation, you were surprised with a trip to Europe from your mother. Then college came around and you moved away, just like you said you would. Neil stayed in town, left with nothing but his bottled up feelings and emotions. Wandering a lost path as he searched for his passion to fulfill. The feeling of rejection stamped onto his forehead, his hopes bursted like a balloon. 

They returned almost an hour later, you were oblivious to how deep Neil was in his own mind. Wide eyes were easily fooled to be invested in Hitchcock’s classic. Mouth ajar opened as he wondered what he was trying to achieve. If there was anything still to win. When you realised he’d hardly touched his food, you shifted closer to him. 

“You okay?” you whispered. 

“Yeah” Neil lied, turning his head towards you. “I’m okay” he told you, but wondered how much he was trying to tell himself that. 

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