#otp: star girl and the rebel

[captastra]

To celebrate my own engagement, I was able to snag a commission from the amazing @redreart of Rhea and Felix getting engaged!! I love this so much, how happy Rhea is and Felix's looking adorable 💗💗 thank you so much for this amazing art, I can't gush enough about it 🥰❤️!

[kazoosandfannypacks]

Favorite ship trope: Awkward Jock X Cool Nerd

(this is not my own idea; shoutout to the mml fandom for making me aware of it)

[fabuloustrash05]

I absolutely LOVE the Red Team's dynamic lol. If it's okay with you, do you have any headcanons about Raph and April's friendship?

Gladly! I have a whole headcanon on how they bonded and became friends!

In the beginning, Raph and April didn't really get along. Not that they hated each other, it's just they felt they had nothing to talk about and nothing to bond over. Raph just saw her as the girl his brother was crushing on and April thought he was an asshole. It wasn't until Leo's disaster of a love life came into play that these two started to bond and form some sort of friendship. They both were the first to know about Karai and warned Leo about her, and he did not listen. Ever since that day, they've been a judgmental buddy duo, seeing stupid shit go down and texting the other about it, ranting together. The "Leo shit talk" got more insane when they found out she's his sister, and jabs and insult were thrown by the Red Team towards Leo about his failure of a love life. The two would also sometimes bicker from time to time, April wasn't too please when Raph was the one who had to come and save her when she was kidnapped by the Kraang in that one episode, and for a few months, Raph didn't let that fact go, constantly teasing April about it.

That was their dynamic for most of seasons 1-2, but by season 3, the Red Team started to bond and build a friendship beyond "shit talking other people". April and Raph were the only two who took responsibility while at the farmhouse. April truly saw another side of Raph, for she always knew and saw him as the hot headed rebel, but seeing him broken over his brother made April look at him in another light. And with Donnie and Casey finally getting along, April started to rely on hanging out with Raph more since her two best friends had no time for her. Raph in fact started to spar with her, and April in truth liked sparring with Raph more than the other Turtles because she knew he wouldn't hold back on her and give her the challenge that she needed to help her improve. Raph started to see April as the big sister he never had and respected her greatly.

When Mona Lisa entered the picture, thing took a big turn. April couldn't help but fangirl over how cute Raph and his girlfriend were together. They quickly became her OTP. During the season 4 space arc, Raph wrote love letters to Mona Lisa and April was the only one who knew about it because Raph would ask April for advice from time to time on what romantic thing she should say to Mona (and also proofread them lol). I like to think April was the one who gave Raph that push to be more bold and confident with Mona cause "girls like that". April became Raph's go-to for dating advice, and unknown to April has been planning Raph and Mona wedding since they came back from space.

April was defiantly the maid of honor at Raph's wedding and of course becomes the fun loving Auntie April to his kiddies in the future, babying sitting them whenever Raph and Mona go out for date night.

Despite all their fun, the biggest thing that solidified their friendship was Splinter's death. April and Raph were the ones there to witness it first hand. Splinter was right in front of them when Shredder stabbed his blade through their Sensai's stomach, killing him instantly. They have a shared trauma, and after Shredder was killed in the season 4 finale and everything was at peace again, April still felt haunted by what she witnessed. The only person she felt she could talk to about it to, the one person who knew the same pain she was going through, was Raph, but Raph refused to open up. I can imagine that April would try to talk to Raph about it but he would dismiss her, telling her that he's too busy to chat, until one night. Up on a rooftop, April found Raph alone looking up at the stars. After some small talk, Raph finally breaks down, crying to April about everything. Through his tears he tells her how he feels he is to blame for Splinter's death, how he wishes he could've done something instead of "standing there and watching like a coward". He would tell April how he feels he's cursed to always loose people he loves and cares about, "First I lost Spike, then Mona Lisa, and now my dad is gone too! I loose everyone I love!!" April would comfort Raph, hugging him as she cries with him, telling him none of what happened was his fault. She reminds him that those people are still with him, telling Raph "Spike may be gone, but Slash is still around always there for you, and Mona Lisa, though she is beyond the stars, I can guarantee she is thinking of you everyday." April's words get to Raph as she expresses that she is feeling the same way he felt, hopeless and broken, telling Raph she hasn't felt pain like this since she lost her mother.

Their shared trauma and opening up to one another that night is what officially made them become true close friends. They felt that they finally understood each other and grew closer as friends.

Overall, their dynamic is that their both 110% DONE with everyone but one is more ready to result to violence compared to the other:

[ironwoodprotectionsquad]

I realized I haven’t like put all of my thoughts regarding Blake’s sexuality and Bmblbe in one location so I am going to do so now. (I am talking about both because one is tied to the other given Blake’s Bisexuality is claimed to be confirmed because it is claimed Bmblbe is confirmed).

One of the very popular “gotcha” moments I see is that Bmblbe and Korrasami have a lot of similar beats in terms of how the pairs acted around each other and Korrasami is confirmed so Bmblbe will definitely be confirmed. 

The big difference however is that Korrasami had Nickelodeon censorships that they had to work around and fight tooth and nail to make them be canon in the end. Bmblbe did not have corporate censorship to fight. They didn’t have to play this game of giving them scenes like blushing and forehead nuzzling without having either character verbally express they like each other to try and show the developing romance while making corporate homophobes happy. RT could have made Bmblbe canon whenever they wanted. They could have given Blake and Yang lines about having a crush on a girl, any girl, they could have had Blake express confusion and admit to liking both Yang and Sun, they could have done all of those things but they chose not to. The issue is that the straight couples get to kiss and say they are going on a date and say “I love you” but the one queer couple with the main characters conveniently...doesn’t. It’s conveniently a “slow burn” it’s conveniently constantly having these moments like the canon game having Yang refer to Blake as like a sister, with having them go dancing with another team with an unresolved question of what is going on between them. It’s all the painful signs of queer coding that we’ve spent decades seeing play out on screen only for nothing to come of it. 

For example, let me jump over to Star Wars Rebels and specifically Kalluzeb. Now this ship is kind of....different. Their screentime together was very limited but fans latched onto what they could get and ran with it. Zeb’s VA Steve Blume also ran with it fueling the shipping with tweets about the pairing and how much he shipped it. Season 4 comes around along with the epilogue that only one of the VA’s knew about. In this epilogue, we see a scene of Kallus and Zeb on a ship together heading to Lira San, a secret world Kallus had no idea existed. We see Zeb leading Kallus out covering his eyes in a way that felt very similar to the library reveal in Beauty and The Beast. We see Zeb wrap an arm around Kallus’s shoulders as the voice over tells us Kallus and Zeb lived together on Lira San and Kallus was accepted as a member of the planet right along Zeb. Their is video footage of Steve crying as he watches this scene unfold as the internet explodes over this with everyone celebrating that Kalluzeb was canon. Even homophobes and haters of Kallus where grumbling and bemoaning them becoming canon because Korrasami set the expectation that moments like this meant the couple was canon. (It should be noted when Korrasami first came out, a lot of people did not see that the ending scene in the final episode confirmed they where canon, the creator himself had to come out and confirm that they where together and they where in fact a couple.)

But then Disney and Filoni (the shows creator) stomped all over the moment. Filoni made a big statement when Steve tried to thank him for making his OTP canon insisting they where in fact not together and that they where just friends. It was a frustrating reminder that no, we could not look at moments like the Korrasami ending as confirmation a couple was together because homophobes will just deny it and rip it away from us at the blink of an eye. Steve, the hero he is, just denies this and continues to post tweets as if they are confirmed but at the end of the day according to canon, they are not. Zines and other fan projects that only do “canon” couples refuse to accept anything Kalluzeb, their is a fear that the new Ahsoka show will make some comment about Kallus or Zeb or both now having a girlfriend and making a point to make sure they are seen as completely and utterly straight.

Bmblbe having similar beats to Korrasami is not proof of them being canon, because other couples that have similar beats to Korrasami have been shot down in the past, in fact RT themselves have done that very same thing with Fair Game. I don’t ship them myself, but watching the show and their scenes together, they share similar beats to what people use to show that Bmblbe is canon, Clover winked at Qrow, Qrow shyly rubbed the back of his neck when Clover complimented him while giving him “bedroom eyes” as CRWBY put it. They have complementary semblances and colors, near the end Qrow even arguably tried to flirt back and gave a fond eyeroll towards him. CRWBY posted Qrow’s boyfriend counter and highlighted scenes read as romantic. A former animator was excited when someone picked up on the fact that Clover winked at Qrow while saying the same line as the waitress we knew Qrow was sexually attracted to. But when Clover died and Qrow screamed in agony and kept his lucky pin as a reminder of him, CRWBY insisted they where not supposed to be seen as romantically interested in each other. They insisted it was just rogue animators that put in those moments. At the end of the day, CRWBY could just turn around and do the same thing to Bmblbe. They could turn around, give Yang a boyfriend, have Blake get with Sun and insist that it was never their intention to have the pair be read as Queer. Their is no moment we can point to in the show that bmblebe has to confirm them as queer that Fair Game did not have as well. The animators shut down Fair Game, what’s to stop them from shutting down Bmblbe? 

Blake should be bi, we should all be able to look at her and say, “Yes this is 100% no questions asked a bi character” but we can’t, not in the world we live in where even today the LGBTQ community is constantly fighting to maintain our rights. A real human person does not need to do anything to expressly confirm their identity yes, but Blake is a fictional character being used to tell a story. She cannot make choices herself, every decision she’s made was one made by the writers. In a world where so many baited characters wound up having nothing come of those tender moments we cannot just take these little moments as “enough” because it isn’t enough. Anyone can deny or backtrack and pretend they are straight. Most people will look at Blake and go “Well yea she has feelings for Yang it’s obvious!” but homophobes and homophobic companies like RT can and will deny and twist the moments in canon and pretend they don’t exist when its more convenient for them for those moments to not exist. 

I want Blake and Yang to get together, I want to see Blake be confirmed bi, but after so many years of being burned, what we have so far is exactly what so many other shows have used to string us along and I want better for fans. We’re in 2023, we should be able to say, “I want better” and not get harassed. 

[dswcp]

What’s funny is I wasn’t following this series, I literally bought this comic because it had a pretty picture of Rose Tico on the variant cover, and then I opened it up and BOOM! Lesbian sex. We just keep winning!

“Doctor Aphra 39.” Marvel. November 27, 2019. Writer: Simon Spurrier. Penciller and Inker: Caspar Wijngaard. Letterer: Joe Caramagna. Colorist: Lee Roughridge.

[imgoingtocrash]

he determined that he’d follow her anywhere // a kanan/hera fanmix

Listen on 8tracks // Listen on Spotify

“A waste of time. Except for one thing: All that thinking and hiding in those early days had trained him to analyze situations quickly and throughly. The tactical smarts Hera seemed to like had sprung from there. In that case, he thought, there was one good thing that had come out of it. Because looking at her in the pilot’s chair now, he determined that he’d follow her anywhere.” - A New Dawn by John Jackson Miller

Soft songs for a couple with a cause in a hard galaxy.

Tracklist:

Hello My Old Heart by The Oh Hellos

nothing lasts forever, and some things aren’t meant to be, but you’ll never find the answers, until you set your old heart free

Between the Bars by The Civil Wars

people you’ve been before, that you don’t want around anymore, they push, shove, and won’t bend to your will, i’ll keep them still

I Don’t Want To Change You by Damien Rice

if you ever need someone, not that you need helping, but if ever you want someone, know that i am willing

Home by Belle Histoire

oooo i know, you have shown me the great unknown, and oooo i see, something bigger than you and me, but when you are not near, i am filled with greater fear, but i know you’re with me, where ever your heart may beat

Come Home by Ryan Adams

and nobody has to hide the way that they feel, if you stay right here, tomorrow you’ll be fine, i will be here for you, standing by your side, so come home

She Burns by Foy Vance

i’d frozen over my desire, covered up in virgin snow, but when i stand beside her, she burns

I Like You by Ben Rector

there are way too many love songs, and i think they’ve got it all wrong, cause life is not the mountaintops, it’s the walking in-between, and i like you walking next to me

Straight Into Your Arms by Vance Joy

you keep me on track, i can’t sleep till you come home to me, into my arms baby, so let’s make the best of what we have, time is precious it won’t last

Stick Around by Ron Pope

i wanna show you everything that i’ve been keeping to myself, i wanna let you see the ugly parts i hide

Stone by Jaymes Young

give me all your pain, and love will set your free, give me all your shame, put all your weight on me, and i’ll be the stone that you need me to be

I’ll Follow You by Jon McLaughlin

as long as you’re around i’ll follow you, you won’t ever be alone, as long as you’re around i’ll follow you, and i will be wherever you go

What Would I Do Without You by Drew Holcomb & The Neighbors

a decade goes by without a warning, and there’s still a kindness in your eyes, amidst the questions and the worry, a peace of mind always takes me by surprise

I’ve Grown Accustomed to His Face by Katharine McPhee

i was serenely independent and content before we met, surely i could always be that way again and yet, i’ve grown accustomed to his look, accustomed to his voice, accustomed to his face

I Will Follow You by Said The Whale

and i will follow you, no matter where you go, i wanna be the comfort in your company

Oh Joy by To Kill A King

you move so gentle and slip to my side, build me no castle oh, no place to hide, for though i’m fearful of the night, she says she’d rather stay and fight

[gifted-burnout-archive]

Who Would’ve Thought

Requested?: yes! so this is a mashup of sorts. I got three separate requests: the first being an interview scene with a bitchy reporter, the second a y/n x luke with some enemies to lovers and an argument, but the actors get on really well, and the third was for a similar teasing, y/n x luke concept. This doesn’t quite cover every part of each request, but it gets a bit of all of them in, ya know?

Word count:

Author’s Note: i think this is the point where i just accept i am a jatp smut writer, right? i mean, it was only a matter of time before it happened... i liked this, writing it was so much fun, if you like this and want more send it in to me!

Warning: this became fluffy smut, you’re very welcome.

the masterlist is here, because i have more stuff like this.

--

“Ok, ok.” The laughs around set subsided after Madison’s joke, the reporter sitting up a little straighter and coughing to compose himself. “I have to ask, and I have to know since that trailer dropped last week… Y/N, I think everyone watching wants to find out a bit more about you and the character you’re bringing to season two?” He asked, turning his attention from the show’s star to the young woman sat beside her, who was wiping tears from the corners of her eyes, trying to stop laughing.

“What is it you want to know?” She asked, sharing a smiling with Madi as she too sat up straight in her chair once more, running a hand through her hair and crossing one leg over the other, all triggers to help her subside the giggles waiting to erupt from her chest, to calm down and get back to the professionalism she had practiced in her bedroom mirror.

“Well, for starters, what’s it been like, joining the Julie and the Phantoms crew? Am I right in saying this is your breakout role, just like it was for Madison last season?” He asked, and Y/N nodded, gripping Madi’s hand in hers.

“Yeah, it is. And I’ll tell you something, I wouldn’t have known what to do on day one without Madi. The closest I came to acting, to television, before this was when I played a tree in my kindergarten school play.” She explained, glancing past the reporter’s shoulder to see Kenny stood watching them with a grin, sending a thumbs up her way. Her body relaxed a little. “Yeah, I auditioned as a dare from a friend at college and, well…” She smiled wider. “Seems like the best decision I’ve ever made.”

“And from what I can tell, the rest of the cast sat in on your audition?” The reporter asked, looking to both girls for an answer.

“Not the first one.” Madi cleared up. “But Kenny and the casting team loved Y/N, and wanted to make sure she was the perfect fit. They had her perform on the sound stage, and the rest of us just sort of snuck in to watch.” She explained, letting go of Y/N’s hand to gesture as she spoke. “We were all just blown away, and Charlie was the first to shout out after she finished. He called out… What did he say?” Madi asked Y/N, who was laughing to herself at the memory.

“Kenny, will you hire her already?” Y/N answered, and the reporter chuckled again. “And from that moment on, I was Grace.”

“Yes, Grace, our mysterious new rebel child. What can you tell us about her?”

“Ok, so, we’ve got Kenny on standby in case I mess up and give away too much.” Y/N prefaced. “So, Grace is the new girl at Los Feliz High, Carrie’s cousin, and coming in with a bit of reputation where we left off season one. I think the best way to describe would be a musical influencer?” She glanced to Madi, who nodded in agreement. “Bit of a rebel, bit of a spanner in the works for Juke despite her and Luke quite adamantly disliking each other.” She added, and the reporter was nodding his head feverishly.

“Yeah, the trailer seemed to show it. Is that the character’s big goal, breaking up our OTP?” He asked, and Y/N bit her lip as she thought for a moment.

“I think she’s a character with a lot of growth, you get a lot from her in the season, which I was so honoured to bring to the table. We’re doing some reshoots tomorrow, finalising one of the big scenes the trailer didn’t show. I can’t say a lot, but Grace is definitely causing some tension this season, throwing in some music of her own too.” Y/N added, quick to change the subject of discussion to something she knew she was safe to talk on.

“What was it like, working with the rest of the cast on the new season’s album?” The reporter quizzed, taking the hint. “Madi, we heard you and Y/N singing together on the trailer, saw it in one of the stills, I can only wonder how two such talented singers get into each other’s rhythm, especially with the difference in genre. Obviously, Madi you have piano, but with Y/N on guitar, I just wonder how it all worked out while filming?”

“We actually wrote the song for the trailer, along with Charlie. The three of us brainstormed the thing for the first few weeks of filming, just like Charlie and I did with Perfect Harmony last season.” Madi explained. “And you know, we all come from very different musical backgrounds, and it allowed for this amazing mixture of pop and rock and grunge that just works. You only hear a snippet of our song, but just wait until you hear the full thing.” She was beaming, and Y/N couldn’t help but smile and nod along.

“The day we recorded it, man, we were all just electric. There’s this section with the guitars…” Y/N paused. “That I won’t spoil… You can tell this is my first press junket, right?” She laughed, earning chuckles from the studio. No-one blamed her for being new, she was learning quickly enough that it wasn’t a problem.

“So, on the topic of Charlie, who is waving at us right now from behind the camera,” The reporter paused as the girls laughed and waved past the camera recording them all at their co-star. “I have to ask about Julie and Luke, and now this new dimension of Grace.” The girls nodded, a question they both had expected and prepared for. “Madi, are we getting a Juke kiss this season?”

“I really can’t spoil it. It’s not fair… But their relationship does take a few turns, it’s a really interesting subplot.” She said with ease, a rehearsed line.

“And what about Grace? What are her feelings around Juke? Jealousy, perhaps?” The reporter questioned, and Y/N glanced over his shoulder to Kenny, who nodded for her to go ahead.

“Oh, she’s definitely jealous, though it might not be the reason you initially think of.” She said with a smile, quite proud of herself for keeping the answer vague enough, a light switching on on the camera to alert of their time finishing. Y/N smiled, getting herself ready to stand up, glad she had ended the interview on a good answer, when the reporter held up a hand for her and Madi to pause.

“And I mean, that chemistry seems to be translating off-screen too, no?” The reporter pressed on forward with his questions. “I mean, the chemistry you and Charlie have off-screen, Madison, is pretty clear. Is there jealousy off screen from you Y/N?” He asked, the questions turning from family-friendly to gossipy rather quickly. The executive producers stood behind the reporter had lost their smiles, Ortega and Becker ready to march forward and end the interview themselves.

But then, Y/N burst into uncontrollable laughter as a response, Madi quickly joining in one the sole base that Y/N was a rather infectious person. Soon, the whole cast was laughing along, the reporter left in the dark as the camera shut off and the girls left the press set stage in giggles, the crew suddenly moving quickly to start packing up for the night, the reporter being led off by assistants as the girls made their way over to their waiting friends and castmates.

The interview had been Y/N’s first and the team’s last of the day, and with the next day being their final shoot day for the season, the younger cast members had decided to celebrate and go out to dinner together, a pre-celebration to the wrap party the next day.

Stood by the studio’s exit was the rest of the dinner party: Jadah, Savannah, Owen, Tori, Sacha, Jeremy, Booboo, Tori, Kyra, Sofia, Halle, and Charlie, the last of whom swung his arm over Y/N’s shoulder as she and Madi joined the group, starting out for a restaurant on the far side of the lot.

“Not bad for a rookie, sweetheart.” Charlie spoke with a teasing tone, earning an elbow to the ribs from his friend. The pair had been inseparable for the whole year, since Y/N got the role in fact, and his arm across her shoulders was such a familiar and comforting feeling, that she found herself cuddling into him as they got out onto the lot and the Vancouver wind chill hit hard. Without pause, Charlie shrugged off his jacket and sat it over Y/N’s shoulders, the pair sharing a smile.

“You know, you should invest in shirts with sleeves, Gillespie.” She muttered, rolling her eyes as he responded with a smirk, flexing his biceps as his arm settled back over her, this time Y/N’s hand coming up and their fingers interlocking as they followed the group towards the restaurant. Madi and Savannah were up front with the other Dirty Candy girls, all singing one of the new songs from the show as they skipped their way across the lot, while Jadah, Sacha, Owen, Booboo and Jeremy were in the middle of the group, seemingly discussing what they were getting for dinner, confirmed when Owen started to rave about one of the desserts the restaurant had rather loudly.

Y/N watched the scene with a smile, watched all her friends with a smile. She knew she was lucky, she reminded herself of it every day she spent with the group of amazing people she had come to call her family. The move to Vancouver for filming was a huge shift, and she had initially thought she’d be alone and homesick, spending all her free time at her rented flat reading out scripts to her walls, but it hadn’t been the case. The cast had adopted her like she had been there since day one, they made her feel welcome and at home in the foreign city, Charlie especially. He was the one who got her out of her shell, who made sure to invite her to every dinner and party and hangout in the first few weeks of filming. He was the one who played guitar with her, who came and stayed with her for a week when she was unwell and stuck inside her little flat.

He was the one who was watching her at that moment in time, a dopey smile on his face as he pulled her closer into his side, pressing a kiss to the side of her head as they followed their friends round a corner, their destination that night coming into view, along with some extra familiar faces.

“Gotta be careful, Y/N, Charlie has a habit of passing on his fleas.” The teasing came from Charlie’s sister Meg, who slipped through the small crowd to hug her brother and his best friend hello.

“Don’t worry, I’ve been getting him treated.” Y/N responded with a grin, the pair sharing a tight hug before Meg moved on to squeeze her brother in hello, both girls smiling at his surprised expression.

“I didn’t know you were coming over.” He guffawed, his smile radiating as he hugged Meg tightly, Y/N moving off to greet Carolynn, Jeremy’s wife, who had also surprised with her appearance. By the look of pride on Owen’s face, it was pretty clear who had planned the gift for his friends. Y/N held out a fist to Owen, who quickly pounded his own against it before the girl continued walking, making her way to Savannah’s side as they found their table in the restaurant far corner, the pair getting themselves sat down. With the two playing cousins on the show, they had both made an effort to get closer, an effort Y/N had made with the whole cast, though her and Savannah got on like a house on fire: they were the same age, and had assumed the roles of big sisters to the younger cast members like Madison and Jadah.

“Charlie’s jacket looks good on you.” Savannah commented with a wink, and Y/N rolled her eyes, shrugging the item off just as Charlie and Meg entered the restaurant with Jeremy, Carolynn and Owen.

“You need to stop; you know Kenny has started commenting on what a good couple we’d make thanks to you?” Y/N questioned, and Savannah nodded with a proud smile. “I suppose you actively put the idea in his head?” She quizzed further, receiving another nod.

“We’re all just waiting for you to get together at this point.” Savannah said with a shrug, a few sets of eyes looking over.

“What, Y/N and Charlie?” Sacha asked from across the table. “Oh, yeah, definitely.”

“Every three months we start a pool and bet on specific dates for you two finally giving in and dating.” Booboo said through a mouthful of bread. “Whoever gets closest is going to be so, so rich.”

“How many people are in on this?” Y/N asked, wide eyed with raised eyebrows. It was new information, at least to her it was, but the rest of the table had heard it all before.

“Sixty three.” Tori answered, sending over a wink as the table burst into laughter, quickly shutting up as the final members of their party started sitting themselves down, Charlie sliding himself along the booth chair to sit beside Y/N, Meg on his other side.

“What’s the joke?” He asked with a cocked brow, and Y/N shook her head, warning him to not venture any further. “Better not to ask, got it.”

“So, we’re thinking of karaoke later?” Kyra spoke up from the top of the table, earning nods from around the table. “Perfect, I’ll book the room.” She said quickly, typing away on her phone to set the group’s plans for the evening in stone.

“Maybe Y/N and Charlie can give us their ABBA medley.” Jadah suggested with a wiggle of her eyebrows, sat on the other side of Savannah. Y/N gave her the finger while Charlie chuckled, throwing an arm over her shoulder.

“Come on, it wouldn’t hurt you, would it Y/N?” Charlie asked, using his best puppy dog eyes on the girl, who reached to grab a slice of bread before Booboo finished it all, chewing it thoughtfully.

“Only if Sacha is our Dancing Queen.” Y/N said with a happy sigh, the blonde boy across the table nodding quickly.

“Happy to do it. Yes. Yes.” He nodded fast, feigning a bow as the table cheered, Charlie looking over at Y/N with a soft smile. She smiled back before resting her head on his shoulder, a part of her still recuperating from the interview. How these guys had done multiple that day, how Madi had sat through almost every single one, Y/N couldn’t figure it out; but the thoughts faded away as menus were brought over and drinks ordered, setting the evening off on the right foot.

By the time food was placed down, the topic of conversation was focused on Carolynn and Jeremy’s dogs, the pair quite happy to show off photos of their fur babies as castmates ate around them, with brief interruptions to talk about the upcoming wrap party the day after, and discussions of the season two premiere plans the following month. With the filming almost finished up, everyone was making plans to head back home to families as they all awaited the news of renewal for a third season. Apartments in Vancouver were being packed up, Y/N herself had started the process of boxing up the life she had made over the past year in the city, with her friends, to ship back off home.

“You alright?” A whisper came into Y/N’s ear, pulling her from her zoned out state as she twirled spaghetti mindlessly round her fork, blinking a few times before looking over at Charlie, who watched her with concern in his eyes. She nodded a little, setting down her fork and taking a sip of her soft drink before shaking her head, lifting up Charlie’s beer and taking a swig, frowning at the taste but swallowing anyway.

“Just thinking about leaving is all.” She muttered back, shrugging a little before trying again on her pasta, eating a mouthful before continuing. “Just, what happens once we wrap for the season? What happens if the show doesn’t get renewed?” She asked quietly. “I don’t want to lose all you guys… I just got you.” She tried to make a joke of it, but the thought had been weighing on her mind for a while. Would they all stay friends? Keep in contact even though they would be spread over the globe?

“I can assure you, sweetheart, no-one will be losing contact with you. If any of these guys love you half as much as I do, they won’t be able to say goodbye to someone as awesome as you.” Charlie whispered in her ear, his hot breath fanning over her neck, and Y/N blushed a little, taking his free hand in hers and giving it a quick squeeze to say thank you.

“How’s it all going, everyone?” The server broke apart the moment and halted the rest of the table’s conversations, Y/N and Charlie quickly dropping their hands and turning back to their own meals as the rest of the table chorused compliments of the food, Booboo and Jadah insistent that dessert menus be brought along as soon as possible. A quick glance around the table revealed that Y/N was extremely far behind the rest of the table in finishing her meal, but her appetite had suddenly disappeared, most likely from the melancholy.

“Could I get a triple vodka coke?” Y/N asked the waiter before he left, smiling up at him as she closed her cutlery.

“Of course, miss. Anymore drinks?” He asked, jotting down a cocktail for Halle and another small glass of wine for Jeremy, disappearing back into the main body of the restaurant as the last few party members finished their meals, drinks arriving with dessert menus.

“A toast.” Jeremy raised his glass, prompting the rest of the table to follow suit. “To Julie and the Phantoms, to found family… And to another season.” He thought over the words as he spoke, Carolynn watching him with adoring eyes, their hands linked atop the table. The toast was met with cheers, Owen letting out a rather loud ‘Whoop!’ as glasses were clinked and drinks were sipped, the night only just beginning.

--

Kenny Ortega was rather glad he had left Y/N and Charlie’s big confrontation scene for their last day of shooting, and after walking into work the following day and finding, quite literally, everyone glued to their phone screens, he decided to check his own Instagram.

The night before had been a success for the young cast, and after dinner the group had travelled into the centre of town for a night of drinks and karaoke, the evening’s highlight being the video that was circulating that morning, of Charlie and Y/N sharing a mic as they sang ‘Waterloo’ by ABBA: Owen had caught the whole thing and put it on his story.

That video was also followed by a photo of Y/N and Charlie sleeping on the couch together at Owen and Charlie’s place later that night.

There was a level of professionalism that had to be maintained in a workplace for productivity, but the ‘something more’ friendship the two guitarists shared had caught the attention of the whole team. It had started betting pools and conspiracies and a game amongst the team to catch pictures of the pair acting like a couple. The kids had started it, of course, but seeing the way the two interacted both on and off-screen had gotten the rest of the crew involved. There was an undeniable connection there, and the waiting game was part of the fun.

And so, as the cast started to arrive for the 12 pm call time on location at the garage, all the reshoots that day needing midday sunshine, no-one was surprised to see Charlie carrying Y/N into work on his back as the pair shared a joke. In fact, they were quite excited to see how they would react to the final scene they had to shoot.

Kenny had given them both the script the week before, but refrained from discussing it with the pair until that day, partially pressured by the likes of Savannah and Owen, simply because an authentic kiss, without the practice or specific instruction from the director, would make for better tv. The plan was to get some close ups, positioning them for certain moments, then run it through once, getting as many extra shots as possible, with the hope being they could do it in one take. At best, it would work, and at worst, both Charlie and Y/N were still actors, and could make a kiss look real.

It took about an hour or so for the cast to get through the makeup, hair and costume departments, and Kenny pulled in Jeremy, Owen and Madi for some reshoots first, leaving Y/N wandering with a bottle of water in one hand and her script in the other, pacing back and forth as she ran the lines over and over again in her head.

The scene was an important one, the start of Juke’s conflict for the season, of Grace’s and Julie’s friendship being tested. From what else the girls had filmed over the past few months, it was clear that the season would leave their friendship on a cliff-hanger, this scene being the catalyst. And it was funny for Y/N, to go from her friendship with Charlie to being Grace, the girl that hated Luke. It took her a little while to get into the right headspace, though it wasn’t easy with all eyes on her, nor with the teasing she was receiving from friends about the night before, and her crashing at Charlie’s. It wasn’t news, Y/N sleeping over at Charlie’s, or vice versa; it was common place actually, after the first few months of friendship it just became a norm for them.

Grace’s character arc was one of reckless abandon, and she almost becomes a bad influence on Luke’s bandmates with her risky ideas and rebellious attitude. They had shot the previous scene, in which Julie falls down the school bleachers while with Grace and twists her ankle badly, the character very lucky it wasn’t worse. And Luke, already disliking Grace, confronts her when the girl comes looking to apologise. The tension that they had built over the season boils over, and Grace kisses Luke, the first time either of them have touched before.

Y/N was a little nervous about that last part.

She was an actress, but it would be her first on-screen kiss, and while the thought of it being with her best friend should have eased her mind, it did anything but. Kissing Charlie, whether she wanted to admit it or not, was probably going to be awkward, cause a rift between the two for at least a little while. And that would have been fine, if they weren’t all heading off home to separate corners of the world for however long.

“You look worried.” It was Owen’s voice that pulled her from her thoughts, the girl turning to find him leaning against the prop table nearby, arms folded and a look of concern on his face. “You alright?” He asked, glancing back over at the set. Jeremy and Madison were still getting some reshoots done, and Charlie was with Savannah and Booboo over in costumes, chatting away as the seamstress sat his clothes just right.

“I don’t really know…” Y/N admitted, looking back at Owen with a shrug. “I mean, I just…” She paused, letting out a sigh. “I’m worried things might be weird? Worried I might suck at the whole kissing thing, ruin the last scene we have to shoot?” She explained, glancing back down at her script as Owen watched on, thoughtful.

“Y/N, you’re a good actress. If the last year has proved anything, it’s that you are meant for this role. You’ve just gotta… You’ve gotta embody Grace, don’t think of it as you and Charlie anymore, because I know that’s what you’ve been doing for the past week. It’s Luke and Grace, yeah?” Owen stopped to make sure Y/N was following, and she nodded. “We need to get you into that headset before we start, alright? You know how to be Grace; you need to get into her before the cameras start rolling. I mean, you’re already dressed like her.” Owen gestured to the clothes she was in, and Y/N smiled.

She did already feel a bit like Grace in the outfit, style choices she had helped to make at the start of the season. To contrast from Carrie, she offset her cousin’s pink and preppy wardrobe with dark colours: Y/N was currently in black jumper with red detailing, paired with a short, tight black denim skirt and a belt that pulled in her waist, plus the fishnet tights and sturdy doc martens her character would soon be known for. Those shoes were the only pair she had worn all season. The makeup and hair team had left her looking flawless, with her hair curling and her eyeliner in a perfect wing.

The more she thought about Owen’s words, the less anxiety she felt.

The more she felt like Grace.

“Ok, ok… We’re getting somewhere.” She informed her friend, Owen holding out an arm for Y/N to link with, the pair beginning a sure march over towards the set, watching Madi finish the last few takes.

“You need anything else?” Owen asked, raising an eyebrow to the shorter girl when she nodded, watching her take a deep breath.

“Put on some music? Just… Something fun?” Y/N asked, having faith that music would completely rid her of her nerves for the scene. Kenny called cut, Madi and Jeremy making their way off set with smiles as they headed towards Owen and Y/N, the blonde boy connecting his phone to the nearby Bluetooth speaker while the set was changed for her and Charlie’s scene.

“I can’t believe this is the end of season two… Y/N? You ok?” Jeremy commented then questioned as he came over with Madison, the latter reaching a comforting out to Y/N’s arm.

“She’s getting in the zone.” Owen explained, finally deciding on a song, the music playing around them and earning a few cheers from the other cast mates, Charlie looking over from where he stood with Savannah and Booboo, his eyes landing on Y/N, who had begun swaying along with the song. She had a habit of this, using music to get into character, though it was usually through headphones in some far off corner.

“Loving you isn’t the right thing to do.” The speaker sang out the Fleetwood Mac hit, Booboo and Savannah beginning to dance along by Charlie as he watched Y/N from across the room, curious as to what she might do. “How can I ever change things that I feel?” Lindsey Buckingham’s voice resonated around the room, and Charlie took a step closer to his main castmates, watching as Madi held Y/N’s hand, quickly realising why the music was blaring.

Y/N was nervous.

“If I could, baby I’d give you my world.” The tracks vocals were overshadowed as Charlie began to sing, heads spinning to look at him as he spun himself around and started his way towards Y/N. “How can I, when you won’t take it from me?” He sang, holding out a hand for her to join him. They were both well aware that two things in particular made Y/N feel better: the first was music, the second was Charlie. With a push from Madi and Owen, Y/N could no longer hide the smile that was forming on her face, taking Charlie’s hand as he led her into a space in the room’s centre. While the crew set up for their scene, cast and producers watched on as the pair got into character.

“You can go your own way!” Y/N sang out, spinning under Charlie’s arm with a grin that scrunched up her nose and made Charlie smile right back, singing the response harmony of the chorus. “You can call it another lonely day!” The pair sang together, Kenny himself starting a clap in time with the music, the whole set soon joining in, cheering the pair on as they got themselves into character.

“Tell me why, everything turned around. Packing up, shacking up is all you wanna do.” Charlie sang scowling at Y/N with his rather adorable grumpy face, and Y/N held a hand out to stop him from coming any closer, playing the part of Grace.

“If I could, baby I’d give you my world. Open up, everything’s waiting for you.” She sang, bouncing a little as she sang, shaking away the last of her nerves as the second chorus came in, the whole room singing along now.

“You can go your own way, go your own way. You call it another lonely day!” As the crew finished setting up the garage for their scene, Charlie grabbed Y/N’s hand as squeezed it tightly.

“We’ve got this, alright?” He reassured, and she nodded, the pair getting into places as the music slowly died down and their fellow castmates and crew members cheered.

“Feeling better?” Kenny asked as the two got into positions, Charlie sat inside the garage as Y/N stood just beyond the doors, being handed a bouquet of flowers by the props manager.

“A lot, yeah.” She smiled, and Kenny gave her shoulder a pat.

“Just go for it, alright? Give it everything, give it electricity, you’ve got this.” His motivational words brought a smirk to Y/N’s face.

“I know I do.” She answered with a nod, Kenny walking back to behind the cameras and taking a seat, Y/N taking a one more moment to focus herself before Kenny yelled ‘action!’.

--

Grace wasn’t used to feeling guilty about anything, it just wasn’t a part of the life she enjoyed: she wasn’t an inherently bad person, though it could be argued she was a bad influence. As she stood in Julie’s driveway, a bouquet of flowers in hand, she felt like a bad influence. No, worse than that.

She felt like a bad friend.

Julie wouldn’t be in this mess if Grace hadn’t convinced her to go out with her the night before. Of course, she should have known that this time of year, with the uncommon rainfall and milder weather, that the bleachers would have been slippery. Grace should have suggested going somewhere else, shouldn’t have rushed up the steps and forced Julie to follow.

And while flowers weren’t going to help a lot with the twisted ankle, she hoped they’d lift Julie’s spirits a little. The doctors said it wasn’t serious, just a week or so in a pressure sock to stop anymore damage, and Julie had promised her the day before she was fine, but even so. Grace had picked out dahlias, Julie’s favourite, and was hoping to bump into Alex or Reggie or Carlos, leave them with her apology for Julie without much confrontation.

Instead, heading up the driveway and pulling open the garage door, she was welcomed by the sound of an acoustic guitar, and a frown settled on her features. Of course, of all the people it could have been, Luke was the one at home.

“What are you doing here?” He asked quickly, jumping up from the couch and setting down his guitar. Grace sighed, a roll of her eyes causing Luke to scoff.

“You know, I’d punch you if I could ghost boy.” She muttered, setting the flowers down on the coffee table. “I just wanted to leave something for Julie, alright? Don’t get your…” She paused, thinking for a moment. “Do you have underwear? I mean, ghost clothing isn’t exactly my specialty.”

“You’ve got some nerve showing up here after what you did to Julie.” Luke said coldly, arms folded across his chest as they stood at opposite sides of the room. He took a few steps to the side, lifting himself up onto the piano. Luke liked to have the high ground.

“What I did to her? Luke, she fell over. It was an accident!” She exclaimed in response, already riled up just being in the boy’s presence. She wasn’t quite sure why she had been cursed with the ability of being able to see Luke at all times, but she wasn’t going to let her annoyance with the guitarist go unsaid.

“An accident that could’ve killed her!” Luke snapped back. “What if she had hit her head instead of just twisting her ankle? Can you answer me that Miss Influencer?” He asked, and for the first time since the pair had met, Grace didn’t answer him back. Luke scoffed; quite certain he had won. “I don’t know what voodoo you put my friends under to make them like you, but I promise I see right through you. Through the clothes and the Instagram followers. All of it.”

“Do you think I wasn’t scared for her? Huh, Luke?” Grace snapped back. “I was the one there, watching her fall down the bleachers, the one who rushed after her and called her dad. Where were you, exactly?” She asked, a smirk settling on her lips. “You know, Lover Boy, if I remember correctly, you were off moping because I’m a better guitarist.” Her tongue came out to graze her bottom lip as she smiled, walking over to Luke’s electric that sat on a nearby stand.

“First off, you aren’t. It’s quite clear who’s better between the two of us.” Luke fought back, jumping off the table and marching over to pick up his guitar before Grace touched it. “And second, I wouldn’t have left her if you hadn’t been there. Because actually, Grace, it’s you that’s the problem!” He had raised his voice as he walked back across the room, setting his guitar atop the piano. Grace scoffed; he just didn’t want her touching his things.

“Right, because Julie can’t have friends if it’s not you, right?!” She was almost yelling now as well, but it was to be expected of the pair. Every conversation they had had was building to this argument. Every conversation they had shared was just bickering. “Hey Mr Invisible Man, news flash! Your crush is allowed to have relationships outside of you! I realise being dead is probably very boring, but Julie’s alive.”

“I just don’t think my friends should be associating with someone as infuriating as you, Grace!” Luke turned to face her again, all wide eyes and gestures. “I didn’t think I could hate people before I met you! I’ve had my music stolen; I’ve almost been enslaved for eternity; I died! And yet, the person I despise most in this world is you. Congratulations!”

“I take it as a compliment! You know, I’m honestly proud that I’m not friends with a self-centred, arrogant, inconsiderate, overbearing jerk. If anyone is fooling our friends Luke, it’s you.” The words were quick and cold, and Luke found himself marching forward until the pair stood about a foot apart, Grace forced to to look up at him, keeping big her chin high.The words were quick and cold, and Luke moved a few steps closer, and Luke moved a few steps closer, the pair a few feet apart, glaring one another down.

“They aren’t our friends, Grace. My friends are just too nice to leave you hanging.” Luke voice had lowered in volume, but the venom was still there as he took a step closer, then another. “You act all mysterious, but you’re an open book, Grace. You’re a lonely girl with a taste of relevance. That’s it.”

“Like you aren’t the same?” Grace asked, stepping forward so the pair were no more than a foot apart. “Quit pretending you aren’t still the lonely kid who ran away from home in 1995, give up the high and mighty act.” She paused, looking him over with a smirk. For a moment, she forgot he was just air.

“I know who I am.”

“Do you?” Grace asked. “That’s not what I see.”

“You don’t know anything about me.” Luke countered.

“And vice versa, ghost boy.”

“I know you’re manipulative, and cold. I know you’re insufferable to be around.” Luke stated firmly, his voice low and laced with malice.

“Anything else to share?” Grace asked. “Or are you done?”

“This is exactly what I mean.”

“You don’t know me!” Grace answered back. “You don’t know why I’m here or where I came from, or what I came from. You don’t get to tell me who I am or what I do or how I act when you have made zero attempts to check your information. I know you because I ask about you! I can call you an arrogant, self-serving halfwit because I actually have tried to figure out why you hate me so much!” She paused for a second, Luke watching in surprise. He didn’t quite feel bad for Grace, but something was building in him, something foreign he had buried away. “If you knew anything about me, you would know what I’m about to do next.”

“What? Leave?” He guessed, his tone still harsh and hostile, but his answer was incorrect. It was quick, something Luke couldn’t process fast enough; but within a second of his reply being given, Grace had somehow managed to touch him, holding her hands to his neck and pulling him down to her level before pressing her lips against his.

—

Y/N and Charlie both had plenty of experience kissing people, but neither of them had felt like that before.

The moment Y/N’s lips were pressed to Charlie’s, it felt like a thousand butterflies had exploded to life in her stomach, the feeling of his lips on hers making her lightheaded. Charlie’s hands immediately came to Y/N’s waist, pulling her so their bodies were flush and her fingers found their way into the curls at the back of his head.

There was a moment there, as the pair held one another, as they kissed one another, that the rest of the world melted away. One of Charlie’s hands moving from Y/N’s waist to her cheek set the skin on fire, had her heart pounding like it was trying to break out of her chest, had her knees going weak that the only way to stay upright was to pull back, to rejoin reality.

It was only as she looked up at Charlie, still dress like Luke, her peripherals reminding her where she actually was, that a shaky breath left Y/N’s body, and she took a step back. Out of Charlie’s embrace, towards the garage doors she had entered the scene through.

“Make sure Julie gets the flowers… I…” She spoke as Grace, shaking her head in disbelief before exiting out of the garage, leaving Luke, or Charlie, dumbfounded. She couldn’t tell anymore if it was real or acting, the lines had blurred a fair amount.

“And that’s a wrap!” Kenny yelled from behind the cameras, the deafening sound of the cast and crew cheering forcing Y/N to slow her pace, to quickly get accustomed to the noise before joining in. A rather large part of her head was telling her to run and hide, to disappear and never return, to book it for the airport and save herself the embarrassment of her flushed cheeks, of seeing Charlie after what she just felt with his lips on hers.

Her eyes eventually travelled up to see Charlie coming off the set with Kenny in one side of him and Jeremy on the other, Madi and Owen walking over to meet them, the latter waving her over quickly with a grin.

“That was amazing to watch!” Kenny was raving when Y/N arrived over, hands clasped behind her back as the director turned his attention to her. “What did I ask for? Y/N, you nailed it! You both did! The whole place was just electric.” He complimented, Charlie letting out a breezy chuckle as he raised a hand to rub the back of his neck.

“What can I say? You hired some great actors, Kenny.” Charlie felt off saying the words, glancing over at Y/N as he said them, the pair sharing a weak smile. What Charlie had felt while the cameras rolled was definitely not something he faked for the screen. His stomach was still in knots, trying to untangle itself after the way Y/N had kissed him left him speechless.

What exactly was he supposed to do? That information had the ability to ruin the friendship he and Y/N had, he couldn’t risk losing her so permanently. He knew Y/N, if they talked about how he felt kissing her and didn’t feel the same way, Y/N would distance herself from any and all contact, and with them all heading home by the week’s end, it was the last thing Charlie wanted to happen.

“That I did.” Kenny agreed, glancing at his watch. “Right, I’ll let you all go and get out of costume. Wrap Party begins in an hour.” He said with a nod, patting Y/N lightly on the shoulder as he left.

There was a moment of silence between the five of them, an uncommon occurrence, no-one quite sure who should speak first. Instead of speaking, Y/N gave Madi’s arm a squeeze before heading off to the costume department to get out of Grace’s head. Maybe the thoughts of Charlie would clear up once she was back in her own clothes, her own headspace.

The four friends watched her walk off, waiting until she had rounded a corner before Charlie received three pairs of hands punching his arms playfully and shaking him, all their of his on-screen band mates barely able to contain their excitement.

“What, what?” Charlie asked, taking a step back to avoid further battery.

“What?!” Madi exclaimed. “That kiss! Charlie, we all know that wasn’t acting.”

“I’m pretty sure everyone in Vancouver could tell that wasn’t acting.” Jeremy added with a grin, nudging his friend who was slowly getting some colour in his cheeks.

“You guys are all insane.” He said quickly, starting his way over towards makeup, but his friends were hot on his tail, none of them letting this budge. Not again: Charlie and Y/N had gotten away with their flirty behaviour plenty of times before, but this was different.

“You should at least talk to her about it.” Owen said with a grin, hands stuffed in his pockets as they entered the trailer and Charlie sat down, helping himself to makeup wipes and removing the thin layer of foundation on his face. “Charlie, come on… I know that your eyes were closed, but we watched you two kiss. If you’re feeling something, Y/N is feeling it too. There’s no way you both faked that.”

“I’m not ruining my friendship with Y/N over a stage kiss.” Charlie said quickly, pulling off his shirt and switching for his own clothes, looking up as the door opened and Sacha came in with Savannah and Tori, the seven all sharing glances.

“Convinced him to go for it yet?” Tori asked after a moment, and Charlie rolled his eyes, jumping out the chair and walking past his friends. “Oh, come on Charlie! It’s clear you both like each other!”

“Tori’s right!” Madi agreed, first in following Luke out onto the trailer lot. “Why are you so hesitant?” She asked, and Charlie came to a quick stop, spinning on his heel to look at his friends.

“I’m going to go see Y/N. Not because of whatever fantasies you all have in your heads, but because I want to make sure my friend is alright.” Charlie explained, though his words didn’t seem to convince any of them. That was fair, he didn’t convince him. “I’ll see you all at the wrap party, ok?” He clarified, but before he got an answer he made his way into the maze of trailers, taking the precise turns needed to get to Y/N’s trailer.

As he turned onto her row, Charlie found himself slowing to a stop about two trailers away, and taking a nervous gulp. Why, why had it taken so long for him to figure out his feelings? Why was it only once they had kissed that he felt all this emotion surging to the surface? For a moment he wondered if it was just his body reacting to kissing a pretty girl, but he knew that wasn’t the truth. Not in the slightest.

The truth was Charlie wanted nothing more than to feel that ecstasy that came with Y/N’s lips on his all the time, and he quickly formed a do or die plan in his head as his feet started back up, bringing him to the steps up to Grace’s trailer. Her name was pasted with gold sticker on the white door, the tension quickly building in Charlie’s chest.

Do or die.

The polite triple tap on the door hurried Y/N’s getting ready, the girl quickly zipping up her dress before slipping on her shoes for the night and answering the trailer door, the butterflies exploding in her stomach as she found Charlie stood in front of her door.

“Got a second? I was hoping we could talk…” Charlie said quickly, hands shoved in his pockets, a nervous smile on his face that had Y/N thinking the worst. This was about the kiss, it was about how awkward he felt about it, no doubt. She knew her anxiety before it was right, she knew that this would ruin things.

“Of course, come on in.” She said with a little smile moving back onto the trailer and allowing Charlie to make his way inside. As Y/N turned to pick up her phone off the table and place it into her handbag for the party that night, Charlie closed the door behind him with a nervous breath. He watched her for a few moments, smiling at her absentminded humming of the song they had sang together while she packed her things away for the party tonight. He took a step closer, running a hand through his hair and straightening his top up, psyching himself up for what he was about to do. She had changed for the party, and Charlie couldn’t help but admire how beautiful she looked in the baby blue sundress. “So,” Y/N asked as she started to turn around. “What is it you want to tal-”

Y/N was cut off when Charlie gripped her by the waist and crashed his lips against hers, not that she minded in the slightest. She was quick to kiss back, her hands coming to his neck as his hands pulled her closer until their bodies were flush. Whatever worry Y/N had been having about what their characters’ kiss would do to her and Charlie’s relationship was evaporated by the heat, the passion, the electricity of his lips on hers.

Charlie was hit with relief when Y/N kissed him back, when she pulled him closer, just thankful that she might have felt exactly what he did on set. He was about to pull away, apologise for what he was doing, for intruding and not letting her ask her question, but as he pulled back to take a breath, Y/N caught his bottom lip between her teeth for a moment, and Charlie was gone.

He pulled her close again, this time his tongue entering her mouth and starting a battle for dominance against Y/N. His hands travelled towards her ass, only gaining control of the kiss when he surprised Y/N by picking her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist as her dress rode up her thighs, hands moving from his neck to grip the front of his shirt, breaking off the kiss for a moment.

They looked at one another, breathing heavy and pressed to one another, both just trying to comprehend what they had done. Y/N was the first to catch her breath, looking up at Charlie with a blush across her cheeks and blown pupils.

“No-one’s ever kissed me like that…” She whispered out, smiling as a smirk played on Charlie’s lips.

“Same.” He responded, walking over and setting her down on the trailer’s kitchenette counter, a hand coming to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “We’re… We’re idiots, right? For not realising it before?” He asked, and Y/N laughed.

“The amount of time we’ve wasted…” She muttered before pulling him for another kiss.

It quickly became heated again, neither of them quite able to control themselves. It was tongues and teeth and moans, and it wasn’t long before Charlie was leaving a hickey on Y/N’s neck and she was pulling off his shirt, quickly reminded of her friend’s body… God, he was hot.

“How long until the wrap party?” Y/N asked through a moan as Charlie pulled away from her collarbones, marks scattered over the skin Y/N would struggle to hide. He pulled his phone from his pocket, checking the time before setting it on the counter beside her.

“About 10 minutes…” Charlie answered, raising an eyebrow when Y/N bit her lip. “What did you have in mind?” He asked, stepping closer, his hands running up the sides of her thighs as he did, pushing her dress up further until he could catch a glimpse of the pastel pink panties she had chosen to wear that day, causing him to groan a little. He could feel his blood rushing down, his jeans becoming tighter around the groin.

“Well, I mean… We’re two consenting adults���” She trailed off for a second, her hands starting on his belt buckle in an uncharacteristically bold move. Charlie’s head fell back as her hand brushed against his bulge, breathing getting heavier once more. “And I’m on the pill…” She added, pushing Charlie’s jeans down slightly, then his boxers, her hand circling his shaft and beginning to stroke it slowly. She was teasing him, waiting for a response, an innocent look on her face that drove Charlie wild. He quickly pulled her panties off, tossing them to the floor and bringing a hand back to her core.

“So wet… And all just for me.” Charlie smirked as Y/N’s expression changed from feigning innocent to one of pleasure: a whimpering moan passing her lips as her eyes fluttered shut, a reaction to Charlie’s thumb circling her clit. “You know, all you had to do was ask.” He whispered in her ear, more of a growl than anything, quickly lining his cock to her entrance and pushing himself inside.

They shared in a moan, Y/N adjusting to the size of his length inside her for a moment, her walls clenched tight around him. They stayed like that for a moment, both adjusting to the feelings, before Charlie’s thumb started up its lazy circles around Y/N’s clit once more. She gave a nod, and Charlie pulled back, this time sinking himself all the way inside her.

They started slow; Charlie enjoying the view of Y/N whimpering in pleasure as she held onto him, begging for him to go faster. He didn’t comply right away, teasing her further with his length, but when she managed to utter out a ‘please’, the bucking of his hips quickened, Y/N’s whole body soon dissolving in the pleasure.

Neither of them had any experience with heaven, but if it was even half as good as the sex they shared, the afterlife would be amazing. Their bodies just worked together, like they were made for one another, each thrust and moan sending pleasure shooting through their bodies. Charlie set the pace, making sure to watch Y/N’s reactions when he changed angle, quickly finding the thrusts that gave her the most pleasure through lidded eyes, and Y/N would tease him further, her walls hugging his cock just enough to have him slipping out curses mixed with her name. It didn’t take very long for Y/N’s legs to begin trembling, Charlie’s hands spreading her thighs further apart as the knots began forming in her stomach, one of his hands moving to hold the small of her back while the other returned to his spot over her sensitive bud.

“Charlie… Charlie I’m close.” Y/N managed to say through breathy moans as the knots in her abdomen got progressively tighter, Charlie moving slightly to find a better angle, beginning to pound mercilessly into her cunt, a smirk on his lips. Her mouth formed into an ‘o’, her eyes rolling back behind hooded lids dusted with eyeshadow for the party that night, the one they were meant to be arriving at 5 minutes earlier.

“Come for me, sweetheart.” He muttered, pressing his lips down on her collarbone as Y/N came undone at his words, the spasms of pleasure bringing forward Charlie’s own release, the smirk quickly fading as he felt his own climax approaching. “Fuck… Y/n, fuck…” Charlie muttered, his thrusts quickly becoming sloppy as he edged on Y/N’s climax, letting out a moan as he shot his load, his head rolling back and his muscles flexing as he filled Y/N, prompting an aftershock to run through the girl, eliciting whimpers from her shuddering frame.

Charlie soon stilled, both of them panting as they came down from their highs, Charlie’s hands on Y/N’s back the only thing keeping her vertical. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to her forehead gently before pulling out, letting out a hiss from the over-sensitivity as Y/N giggled through a whine.

“Jesus…” She muttered, taking a moment before slipping off the counter, lifting her panties from the floor as Charlie tucked himself back into his jeans and grabbed his t-shirt, the clothing item having landed on the back of the nearby couch. “I’m… I’m gonna clean up.” She informed him, unable to stop smiling as she disappeared into the bathroom, leaving Charlie to smile to himself and fall back on the couch with a beaming grin.

How had any of that actually happened?

He sat back up when Y/N came out of the bathroom, her hair fixed and her dress straightened again, though the blush on her cheeks and nose still remained. Charlie smiled and pulled himself off the couch, walking over to her and quickly pressing his lips to hers. She kissed back, the action shared between them soft and sweet this time around, though it still caused butterflies to erupt in both of their stomachs.

“I was thinking… I know you’ll need to go back home and visit family, obviously… But maybe you could spend a few weeks at my place in LA?” Charlie suggested his thumb rubbing against Y/N’s cheek as they held eye contact. “Meet my parents, maybe?” He added with a nervous chuckle. They had planned for her to meet his mom and dad at some point, and him hers, more for the fact they wanted their parents to know their best friend, but that had obviously changed… Best friends don’t fuck half naked in a trailer on their filming lot.

“I would love that… But you have to come home with me afterwards.” Y/N said with a smile, letting out a sweet laugh as Charlie nodded vigorously, the pair locking lips once more.

That night, when Charlie and Y/N walked into the wrap party with their hands interlocked, there was a relief that sat in the air for the cast and crew. Finally, after a year of betting pools and theories and who only knew what else, it seemed the two had finally stopped being idiots and acted on their feelings. It was confirmed when during a slow song, Charlie pulled Y/N onto the dance floor, the pair sharing a kiss as the music played.

On the side lines, it was Meg, Charlie’s sister, of all people who stood collecting cash from crew members. She had got herself in on the betting pool last time she visited, and had guessed the exact date the pair would finally take their next step.

The question of Charlie and Y/N’s budding relationship should have been a ‘who would’ve thought?’, but, in reality, everyone knew. From Madi to Kenny to literally everyone on the entire planet…

Except for Charlie and Y/N.

--

Tags: @lord-of-the-fried @lolychu @deadashcapper5 @aliceinemeraldcity @eries45 @kristencoontz @walkingonshunshine @wxshing-aep @oswin05 @voguesir @delicatelukepatterson @reggieandthereggies @siennanoelle01 @dxsxstxrhxxd @reggiesleatherjacket @a-whole-a-lot-of-fandoms @thetattooink @futuremrsb-r-main @charliessunset @mlt2000 @overlyhypedup @fangirlanonimax @writerinlearning @dxlanhxlland @manaoioahilinai @cocobuttababy @rosiemay02​ @crookedoperatoroperagarden @theatricalfangirl​ @middaydramatic @mloudfish @mps427​ @sweetdayme4427 @anagc-09​ @feliamtion​ @ohyoureaqueenbutuncrowned​ @caitsymichelle13​ @amortiff​ @lovesanimals​ @crappy-unicorn​ @avs-hart​ @ghostlyb1tch​ @lukeys-giggle @aunicornmademedoit @carleywhittaker @crybabyddl​ @writella​ @isabellaskyliner​ @moonyxnights​ @dmcfarland1​ @kiss-themoongoodbye​ @kcd15​ @ellepscal​ @bookdealer5​ @leahstypewriter​

(i’m doing really badly at tagging everyone who asks, so i’ll be sorting out my taglist around halloween to make sure i can keep all of you up to date on my writing!)

[polikszena]

@mattzwright the great asked me to do the fandom ask game for Downton Abbey (and for Star Wars as well but that’s going to be a different post)

Favourite female character: Honestly, I can't decide who to choose, so I'm going to go with Mary and Anna. Anna is a longtime favourite character, I love that she is kind and tough at the same time, absolutely adore her determination and that she is not afraid to confess her feelings. Mary became my favourite during the rewatch, I wasn't expecting to like her that much. I love the emotional range she has behind her cold façade, how she wants to live up to her family's expectations but she also wants to rebel against them (not the same was as Sybil does).

Favourite male character: I think I'm going to pick Matthew here. I like that he starts as an outisder, but then becomes an essential part of the family (not just because he's the heir). Mr Carson comes as second, he's an amazing character.

Favourite season: I haven't watched it past Season 3, and until then I'd pick Season2, because at that point we already know and love the characters, we can see Mary's emotional journey, get to know more about Edith, Anna and Bates get married, also we can see the house in a different role. Also, I really liked that Mary and Lavinia became friends and they genuinely liked each other when it could have been the total opposite as they both loved the same man.

Favourite episode: Season 2 Christmas special. This episode has everything: drama, dogs, charades, scandals, ghosts, Daisy has a scene with Lady Violet, Christmas, a ball, and we finally have the big proposal.

Favourite cast member: Tough one, because I love them as an ensemble, but I think I’ll go with Michelle Dockery, because I watched the most interviews with her and I loved her choices on Cards Against Humanity :P (And if you haven’t seen those videos, do yourself a favour and watch them here and here, plus here’s another with Laura Carmichael, Phyllis Logan and Lesyley Nicol)

Favourite ship: This is a very difficult question (no, not really). Mary and Matthew, hands down. I loved the slow-burn, that they genuinely got along very well, that Mary has learned to love herself more because he loved her. Honestly, it’s such a shame we couldn’t see them laugh more together or being silly around each other. 

A character I’d die defending: Lavinia Swire, without a doubt. She was a very sweet and kind girl who happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

A character I just can’t sympathize with: Major Charles Prickhead Bryant. I know that people were thinking in a different way back then, but bloody hell, if you get someone pregnant, take some responsibility. 

A character I grew to love: I can’t remember anyone who I used to dislike when I first watched the series, but grew to love later - it was more like I started dislike them a little less, because I could understand them better now, but I wouldn’t say I love them.

My anti OTP: I think I’ll go with Mary and Sir Richard. From the outside it could seem that they could have been the power couple, but Sir Richard was too controlling and while they did look good together, they couldn’t get along well which is quite a drawback if you have to live in the same house with that person. Even if it’s as big as Haxby.

[vaguely-concerned]

The Mandalorian Chapter 13 reactions

Well, that was... well. in short I quite enjoyed some of what happened while din was there and I didn’t really care about what happened while he wasn’t there lol. I think it’s becoming increasingly clear that I just don’t care for the episodes dave filoni writes for this show, which is simply a matter of taste I guess. 

(if you loved this episode wholeheartedly -- probably look away now, I’m going to be a bit of a downer about it and I don’t want to shit on your joy haha)

- let’s just get this out of the way first: there’s a lot of stuff around rosaria dawson and transphobia in real life and yeah, of course that affects how I watch the show. I don’t even want to talk that much about ahsoka in this because of it. she was not that good in the role, after seeing how it played out I don’t think the character needed to be in this show at all, and she should never have gotten the role in the first place and that’s about it for what I’ve got to say. 

- dave filoni consistently does things with din’s characterization that feels off and weird to me, subtly out of place with what we see in other episodes (he’s... ruder? more short tempered/cocky/actively or aggressively interpersonal? more prone to express himself directly than he is usually? idk how to describe it but filoni!din always feels one step to the left of what he should be and I’m so hyper-attuned to this character that when something’s a bit iffy with him it throws everything else off haha. it feels like a shallower, more convenient read on him and I don’t like it)  

I also think filoni is almost too familiar with and in love with the source material sometimes? “A Mandalorian and a Jedi? They’ll never see it coming” is undeniably a great line that echoes in decades of deep lore and so on, but dave my good man din had no real idea what a jedi even is until literally this morning. we, the audience, know about this long and storied history, but unless ahsoka spent the afternoon explaining it to him din still only knows the faint outlines of it, he has no personal experience of or attachment to it. it’s not bad, as such, it just rings false to the character based tone of the show for me personally 

- positivity break: baby sitting perched on the dashboard to be close to papa while they’re in hyperspace........sd sdfskdjhfdsakjksdhfkasjd  

also this is some full on madonna and child in the manger shit and I am LIVING for it (odds he’s crying quietly behind the helmet here? pretty damn good if you ask me). the mundanity of what’s essentially the shitty spartan bathroom of the razor crest on one side contrasted with the light and tenderness and love on the other? amazing, a perfect microcosm of what this show does with combining the grittier everyday down to earth stuff in the star wars universe with myth and wonder and magic and through it elevating both

 - the idea of having an iconique samurai/sword duel standoff and a western standoff going on simultaneously is genuinely inspired, but in action it didn’t really work for me. (the sword duel stuff needs these moments of stillness with sudden outbursts of violence and then stillness again, the western standoff needs mounting tension until it’s nearly unbearable, and cutting between them the way they did you sort of didn’t get either to its full potential. again it’s a cool idea, though, I hope someone picks it up and does it better at some point)

- seeing a jedi and a mandalorian wander together through a burned out wasteland left desolate by greed and warfare should have hit me harder than it did but for some reason it didn’t, idk. thematically sound, though, I like it a lot on the metaphor level

- I LOVE that pure beskar makes a specific sound, and that it’s an almost ethereal noise like the high clear chime of a distant bell. also now din has something to fight light sabers with that isn’t the dark saber which makes me so happy because you guys I do not want him to be the mand’alor. keep that funky laser sword away from my dad, apart from killing him at the end that is literally the most boring way to end his arc pls do NOt 

- wow they really went in hard on the samurai stuff in this one huh! there is a part of my mchanzo-loving heart that thrives on seeing a space cowboy and a space samurai team up, *wild otp-fuelled whisper* they’re twin genres inextricably entwined okay they belong together if you see this spreadsheet I’ve made over here -- 

- even knowing it was just a trick I felt such intense distress seeing the signet pauldron away from din. like the attachment I have to these pieces of metal because That Armour Means Dad... wild  

- they really chose the dumbest name possible for the baby huh fsajdfhsaj I agree with din his name is ‘kid’ now (eh just give me a while to get used to it probably I’ll come around)

also... you know what I’ve said before about shrinking the big unknowable galaxy ‘the mandalorian’ has been setting up? wow did they do that big time in this one, and it makes me feel decidedly :/. why does the baby have to come from the jedi temple, is there truly no other tradition of force users in the entire galaxy he could be from? WHY do you have to pull thrawn into this when most people watching this show won’t even know why he’s such a big deal? is this a stealth tease for a rebels sequel? if so why spend an entire episode of this show that only gets eight precious episodes a season on it??   

- on a more fun positive note: baby’s clothes are clean again, so it’s confirmed that din does wash them (and I guess that he does have some means of washing clothes aboard the razor crest!). I loved... most of the dad and baby stuff in this one, but then don’t I always I’m easy to please that way haha (the ‘playing catch’ sequence felt a bit off to me but I don’t know why. din being like ‘he’s so stubborn’ wasn’t... eh. didn’t land right. “that would be a first” was fun tho lol) 

- having ahsoka state the baby’s feelings out loud like that felt... weird? and also kind of unnecessary in parts, like yeah he’s a baby who’s been passed along to different groups of strangers and experimented on by empire scientists, you don’t need to spell it out for me that he’s been scared and lonely, or at least spell it out more interestingly? it’s such blunt force storytelling where it didn’t need to be? there are more elegant ways to get the same things across, I am absolutely convinced 

- ...wow while I was watching the episode I was mostly like ‘okay this is Fine I can go along with it’ but seeing what I’m thinking about in hindsight... yeah probably my least favourite episode of this show full stop haha, it took the spot from chapter 5 which was also a filoni ep

- I did 100% genuinely adore the whole part of din approaching the town and meeting the magistrate. consistently hiding the baby behind his cape and his arm? being deliberately, teeth-grindingly dispassionate with everyone, just giving them nothing? getting to see a bit of professional bounty hunter din again? wonderful in every way, I love this man  

- lots of meaningful shots of baby in the middle with a mando on one side and a jedi on the other, it’s almost like they’re setting up some Themes here lol 

- ...do you think din told ahsoka about either the rhino-levitating or the force choking. because girl I don’t think not training him is going to make this just go away haha, he just won’t know what he’s doing  

- it makes me so sad that baby connects his force powers with being abused :( (also a heartbreaking sign of just how much he cared about din from the very beginning, since he used it on the mudhorn to save him anyway ;________; was that like. literally the first time he sensed kindness and affection in anyone in like twenty five years or... ) 

- I understand why ahsoka would feel this way because of her past and specific traumas, but tbh attachment in a baby? probably a good thing, he doesn’t really have the higher brain functions to cultivate non-attachment yet and needs a safe figure because again. he is a baby. 

good on her for realizing it’s not a task she can take on both for the baby’s sake and her own, and also that din is that baby’s Dad though. the way she smiled at the end watching them leave seemed vaguely hopeful/had a little bit of wonder in it, like maybe she felt the potential for something good there, something she couldn’t conceptualize from her background but could sense the tentative outlines of anyway?  

(also so much pressure on a lil bb to decide his path... his dilemmas should be limited to what colour socks he wants to wear today not the course of his entire life :( I know he’s a magic baby but.......) 

- idk maybe I’ll find more affection of this episode through rewatches, you never know

[captastra]

What form of love does your ship embody?

Sorry for the very long delay...its been a long week >.< Anyways! Tagged by @poisonedtruth​ @euryalex​ @shegetsburned​ @roofgeese​ and @detectivelokis​ 💗!! Tagged to take this uquiz!

Lily x Tangerine - Bullet Train

love as violence

[ love as bloodshed, crimson as a knife slipped between your ribs ] when ocean vuong said "to arrive at love, then, is to arrive through obliteration" and when franz kafka said "you are the knife i turn inside myself; that is love" and when ada limon said "how do you love? like a fist. like a knife" and when richard siken said "sorry about the blood in your mouth. i wish it was mine"

Rhea x Felix - The Outer Worlds

love as light

[ love as a luminous force—warm, radiant, and golden ] when mary oliver wrote "light of the world hold me” and when charles bukowski said “I look at her and light goes all through me” and when david viscott said “to love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides”and when e. e. cummings said “lovers alone wear sunlight”

Some no pressure tags (especially if I missed anyone): @bearcina @clonesupport @the-grand-king-queen @incognito-insomniac @kyber-infinitygems @kourumi @confidentandgood @poetikat @theelderhazelnut @galaxycunt @phillipsgraves @madparadoxum @aceghosts and anyone else who wants to share!

[thinkingisadangerouspastime]

For the ask game Mai??

MY GIRL MAI!! PERHAPS THE MOST UNDERRATED AND UNDERAPPRECIATED ATLA CHARACTER!!

Why I like them: EVERYTHING ABOUT HER. EVERYTHING. her dry sarcasm (literally mai's witticism is on level with azula's she's just quiet about it), her talent with knives, the way she subtly rebels against azula and her parents (despite their intense restrictions of her), how BEAUTIFUL she is, how she stands her ground when zuko was being a possessive jerk in the beach, her blasé attitude that actually hides her very intense loyalty and care she feels for her friends, the fact that her trauma is presented in a different way than women, especially women of color, are often "allowed" to possess (e.g. she internalizes it rather than acting out; compare to toph. not saying either is more correct than the other!! absolutely not!! just that mai's portrayal is one i hold close to my heart), and really just how complex and nuanced she is in general. how can you NOT adore her??

Why I don’t: mai is perfect because she is a realistic character. i do not take criticism

Favorite episode (scene if movie): nightmares and daydreams because we get to see her softer side with zuko but also boiling rock part 2,, for obvious reasons. she stands her ground against azula!! she trusts zuko's judgement despite his refusal to be fully honest with her!! (which was to protect her, not shading zuko here lmao.) mai was truly the star of that ep 😤

Favorite season/movie: i love mai in book 2 ("just take the bear" LMAO) but i gotta go with book 3. her arc is so amazing!

Favorite line: OKAY im gonna be cliché: "You miscalculated. I love Zuko more than I fear you." like holy crap. that's a contender for the most powerful line in atla, regardless of if you ship maiko or not. mai stands up to one of her primary abusers and it is incredibly satisfying to see. comeuppance!! she refuses to be pushed around any longer, and we're all rooting for her 👏

Favorite outfit: the classic, of course

OTP: probably maiko because of the canon content, but mailee is such a close second. honestly im due to write some mailee

Brotp: mai&aang!! they are besties okay! and obviously maiko and mailee in platonic contexts are phenomenal, too. ooh - i've also grown partial to sokka&mai and suki&mai

Headcanon: appa loves mai. his list of favorite people is aang, mai, end list. he loves the rest of the gaang, of course, but mai likes brushing him whenever he's visiting the fire nation and takes him flying in her spare time so appa thinks she's the coolest person ever.

Unpopular opinion: this isn't even an unpopular opinion, it's straight up canon - mai was not toxic and abusive. odds are, people who think she was are racist, sexist, and usually too obsessed with ships to acknowledge the complexity of characters outside their favorite pairings.

A wish: besides my wish that fandom would stop ignoring her or worse blatantly misinterpreting her character? i wish we could get some more content of her post-atla! maybe her as fire lady?

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: it's kind of already happened, sadly, but i really want some mai content that shows her existing outside of romance. smoke and shadow at least included a lot about her relationship with tom tom and her father, but the whole kei lo subplot felt really unneeded. her and zuko breaking up was fine, but kei lo? was the point of him just to have mai break his heart at the end? nah. i ain't about that

5 words to best describe them: collected, sarcastic, funny, loyal, powerful

My nickname for them: no nicknames!

[signofwolf]

Kingdom of Ash by Sarah J. Maas – book review

Series: Throne of Glass #7 Genre: YA, Fantasy Theme: Fae, magic users, war Warnings: mentions of torture, imprisonment Star rating: 0,5/10

Why did I pick this up?: I wanted to end this horrible series once and for all.

[Heavy spoilers ahead]

To make myself clear, before this book I quite liked this series. It wouldn’t place in my top 100 books, not even close, but it was a pleasant pageturner to listen to in audiobooks when working.

Language

Let’s start slow. I lack the words to express how much I hate the words ‘male’, ‘female’ and ‘mate’ after this series. Not even gonna try to express my trauma. But these 3 gems aside, Sarah J. Maas needs a dictionary. Or compress her work to a manageable size. Everything sang, Everyone melted, Every man roared, Every woman trembled, Everyone was unleashing themselves at least once a chapter (number of chapters: 122) ). And now I know definitely too much about Yrene’s ‘womb’. I know so much…

Dynamism

I thought that was a book about a war with heavy action content. Oh boy, I was wrong. This 984-pages monstrosity has maybe 5 pages of action. If you squint.

Every sequence, where by design action should take place was followed by one of two scripts:

Few sentences of action and then a few pages long internal monologue. Often repeated with the same character after the next few sentences of action, or with the next character and then the next (sometimes the first character made a second appearance and then everything would go all over again). And the word ‘character’ used in these sentences is not because I’m rambling. This book is written that way!

Few sentences of action and then action stops, and we are graced by a few pages long conversation. In the middle of a battle. Or spying. Or in Erawan’s chambers, when his castle is going down, and he is running up the stairs...

Time

Leaving alone the fact that apparently all series took less than a year (till this book I estimated the plot for about 3 years, Wiki told me it was 2, but Maas knows best), because that is a can of worms in itself. Time in this one? I honestly have no idea. There were many ‘few weeks of travel’ parts with two main groups of POVs. Personally my only time indicator was ‘Orynth won’t fall till Aelin gets here’. But nothing just fit. And I saw Lost Song when in the last episode we as the audience realized that our two POVs parallel storylines are in reality millennia apart. Lost Song made sense.

Emotional loading

… there wasn’t any. Really, it was like reading a milk label. Every time the scene was potentially emotionally impactful, Maas went ahead to overexplaining EVERY. GOD. DAMMED. THING. And it was abso-fucking-lutely everything. ‘Emotional dilemma? Let’s current POV explain it! 2 pages should be enough… Damn maybe it wasn’t enough. I know! I’ll switch POVs and explain it through the other character!’ <= My impression of Maas’ thought process. I’m fairly sure that the record was 7 POVs explaining the same thing in the row, but I was blacking out a little, so I cannot be sure.

And if that wasn’t enough, this book had a second way to defuse tension: random-plastic-repetitive-badly_written-smut. Really badly written and really repetitive. How could you not feel the spicy bits, when Manon (cruel, self assured 100+years old witch-queen) reacts the same in bed as Elide (20years old, virgin, ex-slave). And the rest of them were the same, there weren’t ANY distinctions.Just copy-paste.

The next point in current case: Someone died, it was impactful, I really liked the character, so I got sad. But then 2 of our characters came out of the room with a body, and after a paragraph of grieving they started making out, and then I was regaled with 2-pages-long description of melting cores. That was the place then this book stopped being badly written, and started being distasteful.

Characters

Remember when I was writing about switching POVs (which is 15(!!!) In the whole book. Oh and an omniscient narrator in places when our current POV was grieving too much to overthink something, but Maas still wanted to inform us about something)? They were all savagely murdered in the worst way: character mutilation. Somewhere between books our maybe-not-that-original but colorful and interesting characters became carbon copies of each other. I have no idea how many times I didn’t realise there was a POV switch. The only indicator was a change of pronoun, or when Maas was telling us the name of a current narrator. These were the only ways. And if you can't distinguish if you are in Dorian’s head or in Manon’s, that is the sign of a really BAD writing.

Romance

…there wasn't any. In all this book there wasn't any naturally progressing romantic scene. There were Maas’ endgame pairings which were sexing or pinning. As the author Maas loves to write about soulmates. And it’s not a bad thing itself. When I want some fluffy story I often tag ‘soulmates’ in AO3 and voila, +10 to good mood. But God above, it is not cute when every pair you write about are ‘true mates’ just BECAUSE. It is the only way Maas sees a relationship, as a fated pairing, written in the wake of the universe by the God himself. There is no choice, nor the work to put in it. They are the author's OTP and that means that they are perfect and they should have children right now. Point in case:

Guy was treating a girl like a shit on his sole, including throwing her naked out of tent, on a snow, with their friends present, all the while abusing her verbally in a worst way. But it’s okay, because when she almost died he realised his mistakes and apologised. Two scenes later, he was forgiven, because... fated mates?

The pathos

I know that many people don't like this type of scenes, but it's not my case. I’m reading by picturing images and not repeating words. I like sequences that I can imagine to be grand and glorious, even if they are a little corny. That said, the pathos scenes were the most disappointing ones for me. Maas likes to write parts that are more picturesquely exalted than logically possible [point in case: meeting of 5 armies/forces in the random patch of sand in Empire of Storms, and it being painted as ‘an Aelin’s great plan’. I laughed myself silly at that. But not taking logic and all the plot holes into consideration that was a nicely looking scene. In Kingdom of Ash that wasn’t the case. I would say that the author wanted to paint us a renaissance painting every 20 pages or so. In my opinion, every time she failed miserably. Each and every of those scenes was or to farfetched to be even remotely realistic, and evidently written only for a sake of the picture, or just plainly stupid.

Example, and it’s so priceless a scene, that I just need to share it: Battle of Orynth, 25th day or so (time in this book doesn’t exist), the 13. sacrificed themselves (like thousands before them but hush). And then, time stops: grieving Manon is going through the city, they open the gates for her (yes, the siege is still on), she goes to the place where they died, after her come out all of our main heroes, and half the city itself with ‘flowers, rocks and precious possessions’ and they lay it there in a tribute to these brave (evil till 2 months ago) witches. I honestly can’t remember when was the last time I saw such an abstract scene. It’s a material for an essay in itself. No, I could not take it seriously.

Additionally, it's hard to make an impact as every damn sentence is grand and lofty. In the end it became truly pathetic, Aelin vs Maeve was unreadable.

Character deaths:

Let's make a quick count: main characters in a series at the start of KoA: 12 secondary characters in a series at the start of KoA: 20ish minor and total background: a lot more

Death count: main: 0 secondary: 3 minor: 2 (11 if we try very hard)

Resurrections: 1 (possibly 3, but not gonna analyze it)

Did you feel emotions of this impossible war against this all-encompassing, all-powerful, invincible, immortal, cunning Evil with armies from 3 continents and 2 worlds? No? Me neither.

Oh well, but there were a lot of deaths of ordinary soldiers. I’m quite certain that all of Terrasen’s army was at least twice brought back to life for them to die in these numbers.

Logic or lack thereof

Oh, and let’s not forget about the Deus ex machina army of unbeatable, magical elves on wolves, from legends, living for the past thousands of years in the unreachable lands of the north, because they managed to run from the surprise attack 10 years earlier. Did I mention that they came from portals, which the whole book was telling us were impossible to make in this scenario? After the previous saviour army was already fighting there for a day? And that Aelin didn’t know they would come for sure (how did she contact them again?)? Even though they were waiting in the full armours for these portals? Ah, and also: that army didn’t do anything. They just came and fought for maybe 4 minutes. And there were just so many things like that!

And if we’re on the topic of armies I present you: ‘My favourite absurd-list in the series: allied armies’.

(As a comparison, in A Song of Ice and Fire by J.R.R Martin, in 7 kingdoms of Westeros, at the peak of war there were 7 forces present, but not all were even engaged in a war.)

First the ones that made sense:

Armies of Terrasen’s Lords (counted as one, not gonna nitpick)

The Khaganate army (also counted as one)

Galan Ashryver’s armada

Whitethorn fraction

Rebel Ironteeth witches

…should Dorian be counted as an ‘army’?

And there were some that did not:

Ansel of Briarcliff’s army

The Silent Assassins

Mycenians

Wild Men of the Fangs

Army of magical elves on wolves

And the ‘I don’t even know’ category:

Crochan witches

Overpowering and overreaching

Section title tells it all. The stakes were too high. I was honestly waiting for Aelin to become Super Saiyan and start to throw planets at Maeve and Erawan. I won’t spoil if this happened.

In my opinion it could be a really great series, if our list of villains ended with Arobynn and King of Adarlan, and the list of Aelin titles with an assassin and a princess. We could have had two main fight plots: one emotional with Arobynn, when Aelin would have to face a damage he had done to her, and overcome it. And the second one, with freeing Terrasen from Adarlan’s rule. That’s it. There was an asshole, power hungry king, who feared magic and wanted to rule the East part of a continent. A lot of plot, but not so much that we stopped to care, or didn’t have time to cover everything. We could really get to know what Terrasen and his people were like and not JUST GET TOLD that it was ‘the greatest place in the world’ every damn 20 pages.

Plus…should Dorian be counted as an ‘army’? It's a REALLY valid question.

Climaxes

IIf I have to write a list of things that disappointed me in this book, this review would be thrice its current size, but one of the worst grievances I have is the complete lack of acknowledging the plotlines that had been started. This book series has overall 4 372 pages (not counting novellas) and 12 main characters (still not gonna address this). All of them had their storylines and arcs but if they weren't tied up in the previous instalments they wouldn’t be in this one. I get it, Maeve and Erawan got beaten (in an extremely unsatisfactory way) but they were only a background in this series' plots.

Aelin Well, Aelin was one of 3 people (+2 paragraf-long insertion from Nesryn and Chaol) who got their own POV’s after the battle (second was technically Rowan, who was ‘Aelin’s POV outside of Aelin’.The third Dorian, who got almost a full two pages). And from this we got that: she got crowned, Aedion got his bond and that Maas have no idea how the city looks after weeks of siege. In her case what angered me the most was ‘Terrasen is my home’ subplot. Only in this tome we read at least 3 times that Aelin will be okay with dying, if only she gets to see Terrasen one last time, or if she get to die on Terrassen soil. But you know what? Maas forgot to write the scene where Aelin actually ‘comes in’.

Mannon Didn't get her own POV after the battle, but here’s what we’ve got: She is going to the Wastes with Croachans and Ironteeth. Whait. What? Yes, that was the ending of this 500+ years of feud. They fought together and they decided to unite their two species, completely forgetting more than half a millenia of slaughter. I can only hope that there were at least some talks behind the scenes… NO! F*** NO! This isn’t how it works!

Rowan, Dorian, Chaol, Yrene, Lysandra, Aedion, Lorcan, Elide, Nesryn, Sartaq Lived happily ever after

Secondary minor and total background characters Survived (I acknowledge that they would be ignored in most books’ epilogues, but this abomination is almost 1000 pages of nothing!!).

Good Scenes

That saying, this book actually had 4 good scenes:

Crochan witches go to war - gathering-forces-to-fight trope, which is my *love-always trope* so I’m not even sure if it was relatively good, or if I’m just a slut for this trope. It was still only a paragraph long though.

[recurring] The children’s tale Aelin repeated to herself to remember who she is.

‘Lorcan Lochan’ - the only marginally funny scene in the whole book

I actually found Darrel making Evangeline his heir charming. Even if circumstances were far-fetched at least.

But the words crime of this book? It was agonisingly, mind-numbingly boring. If the overexplaining and repetitions were to be taken out I highly doubt that there would be 300 pages left.

For these 33 hours of audiobook I suffered through I give it half a star. Because Abraxos exist.

Please see my garishly accurate cover on my instagram! You can also like it there :D

instagram | goodreads

[thefanficfaerie]

Quick Vote on OTP Challenge

I am only going to do 2 couples for each set of the OTP Challenge. Chris Evans and Rebel Queen will be one of them for all three but I will change the other couples. So who would you like to see. 

Jim/Kitten bu @auduna-druitt 

Len/Doll by @auduna-druitt

Rafael Barba/ Miss Fashionista @vintagemichelle91 

Steve Rogers/Tony Stark 

Steve Rogers/Sugar Baby @tilltheendwilliwrite

@tilltheendwilliwrite @bucky-the-thigh-slayer @bohemian-barbie @star-trekkin-across-theuniverse @outside-the-government @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan @starshiphufflebadger @bkwrm523 @brooklyns-boys @mrsrafaelbarba @madpanda75 @angryschnauzer @all1e23 @thatesqcrush @woakiees @onedarksea @girl-next-door-writes @auduna-druitt @sabrecmc @avengersandco @tropicalcap @tropes-and-tales @shreddedparchment @heli0s-writes @heli0s-writes @kittenofdoomage @kaunis-sielu @kaitymccoy123 @naferty @goingknowherewastaken @captainsbabysitter-blog @theycallmebecca @k-evans-writes  

[dswcp]

This week’s theme: Magnificent Lettering! (Remember to read this manga right-to-left.)

The topsy-turvy composition, rich use of contrast, and even the words themselves are all startling and unusual, but the star of this page is the beautiful, unnerving lettering. It captures Ciena’s relatable feelings of hurt and confusion so strongly. Even the detail that the “Why?”s are spaced out while the “Promised...”s and “Betrayed...”s are cluttered shows her mind roiling between quiet shock and loud fury.

“Lost Stars,” Volume 2, Chapter 11. September 3, 2019. Original YA novel by Claudia Gray. Adaptation and Illustration by Yusaka Komiyama.

[dangermousie]

All the dramas I am watching this month and next

(Not counting the ones that haven’t aired yet or the fact that I want to do a 6 Flying Dragons and Come and Hug Me rewatches.)

This is loooong, so enter at your own peril.

Flower Crew: Joseon Marriage Agency (watched 11/12 aired) - I honestly don’t know why I am keeping up with this one as I tend to watch with one eye and do something else with another. And if it hasn’t grabbed me by ep 11 and it’s not exactly Jumong length, it’s not gonna ever grab me. But it’s so pretty and relaxing even though I wish the story was about the evil ambitious girl and the traumatized womanizer. 

Rebel: The Thief Who Stole the People (watched 11/28 complete) - it’s a very very solid drama (though ironically in light of the cap I chose, the romance does nothing for me; luckily it’s secondary.) It’s not going to go on my favorite list but it’s very very well made and I am always down for a period rebel trying to bring down a corrupt government. My favorite take on that trope is likely always going to be 2008 Hong Gil Dong followed closely by the criminally underrated Return of Iljimae, but this is very good.

Just Between Lovers (watched 4/16 complete) - this is so gorgeous and tender and lived in. I am watching it very slowly mainly because I ff so very little. I love the two above with unholy degree of investment and want them to heal each other.

Goodbye My Princess (watched 13/55 complete). Well, these two are not gonna be healing each other any time soon. If you trick your wife in order to kill her grandfather and wipe out his clan, she is unlikely to OK with staying married, just saying. I am looking forward to these two self-destruct and destroy a small galaxy in the process of dealing with their doomed love.

The Tale of Nokdu (12 watched/14 out) - it continues to be funny (though seeing he is the son of the mad king, those are not the genetics our heroine should mix hers with) but I like it, not love it, since comedies are not normally my forte. 

Extraordinary You (12 watched/12 out) - I am obsessed - it’s clever and metaish and moving and romantic and funny and I wish to get all the eps and binge like an insane person. Also, Dan Oh x Haru better have a happy ending or I will riot.

One Spring Night (watched 2/16 out) - I am watching it really slowly but it’s a total delight. I slept on the Jung Hae In mania because I wasn’t watching kdramas (we were on a break :P) when he first became a thing, but he is so good and Han Ji Min is always awesome and I root for them so hard. Plus, noona romance is always a plus. 

The Great Graftsman (sorry, haven’t seen English subs for this one, watched 6 out of ?) I am a sucker for Wallace Huo and Yang Mi and period stuff. It’s very early days yet so I don’t have a strong impression. 

Love and Destiny (watched 10 out of 60) - I was obsessed with this star-crossed supernatural love story when it was aired but it had the most inconsistent sub release I’ve seen in a long time. Now all the subs are on schedule and my interest has moved on but it’s slowly reawakening mainly because the OTP is so slowburn and epic and I want the God of War to be miiiiine! Ahem.

Angel’s Last Mission - Love (watched 4 out of 16). Blame Nalini Singh for giving me a thing for angel fetish. Or something. It’s romantic and lovely and I didn’t watch when it aired because it had tragic ending written all over it (blind bitter ballerina and an angel? Yeah) but now I know the ending and can watch in peace.

Legend of the Phoenix (watched 12 out of 41) - only in a cdrama would you start with goofy physical comedy and transition to terrifying angst and torture. Just how I like it! Also, happy ending, thank God!

Haechi (watched 1 out of 24) - don’t cry, Jung Il Woo! You finally picked a good project! This one is binge territory and he makes the sexiest tortured royal arguably ever. 

Her Private Life (watched 0 so far) - I really want to watch it but it’s too close to me watching Secretary Kim and this would be waaaaay too weird to watch two romcoms in a row with the same leading lady. 

Search WWW (1 out of 16) - older ladies, younger men; lady friendship, and all the color being leached out. I kid but fondly - this one is fun so far.

My Country: The New Age (6 out of 6 that aired so far) - for God’s sake, someone feed Hwi and give him a comfy bed and a therapist. Physical and shrink. This one is my obsession. 

Fates and Furies (4 out of  20) - aka Joo Sang Wook does a complete 180 from his monster character in the Grand Prince. I mean, he gets a gold-digger hired to wreck him to fall in love for real. Smart woman.

The Secret Life of my Secretary (about to start) - heroines of this and Secretary Kim should form a club for secretaries who hook up with their weird hot bosses. 

While You Were Sleeping (about to start) - I miss Lee Jong Suk! Not enough to watch Romance is a Bonus Book wince LJS not being tortured in a drama is against the laws of nature. 

Still 17/30 But 17 (about to start) - My Country has given me a fixation with Yang Se Jong. Plus the potential for a girl waking up from a coma as a 30 year old woman tingles my spidey angst potential senses. 

Deserving of the Name (about to start) - she is a modern doctor, he is an ancient doctor, time travel! It’s like a Faith AU where the heroine hooks up with Lee Philip’s character. Or Bidam lives and studies medicine. Why is Kim Nam Gil not in more things, anyway?

Devilish Joy (1 out 0f 16) - the soft filter annoys the hell out of me, but it’s so sweet and kooky and lovely.

[petrichorblue94]

You can literally swap Stydia wth the plotlines of my other OTPs and they’d still be beautiful.

Stiles and Lydia in Star Wars? Lydia Martin has always dreamed of belonging. A cute robot and a stormtrooper called Danny Māhealani might just lead her to where she was always meant to be: the Resistance and Noah Stilinski who is the father she’s always wanted. But she did not take into account the emotional tether she would have with the leader of the Dark Side, the handsome but wicked Nogitsune. Just who is he under the mask? It is not the Nogitsune she falls in love with, she tells herself, but Stiles Stilinski, the boy he used to be, the boy he could still be. 

Stiles and Lydia in Game of Thrones? Stiles is Lord Commander of the Night Watch. He has lived and died and been brought back to life, protecting the world from the supernatural. One day, Lydia Martin, the radiant beauty of his childhood, enters through the gates. Stiles remembers Lydia as the romantic girl who dreamed of marrying prince Jackson, but she is not the same girl now. First a hostage of the crazy Prince, then a plaything for the perverted mastermind Peter Hale, then sold to the Beast of the North, she has ran away, to him, the only man she still trusts to keep her safe.

Stiles and Lydia in Naruto? Stiles has always been despised by everyone in Beacon Hills. The reason? 16 years ago the nine-tailed dark kitsune, Nogitsune, nearly obliterated everything. His father and mother sacrificed themselves to save the village and they sealed the nogitsune inside him. Now he is determined to proove himself and become a warrior-protector of Beacon Hills. Too bad he is teamed with Derek Hale, the angsty boy whose family was mysteriously slaughtered (by Derek’s young uncle Peter, allegedly). On the bright side, his other teammate is Lydia Martin, his crush since the Academy days who wants nothing to do with hi.

Stiles and Lydia in Bleach? Stiles has always had a normal, happy life, despite the early death of his mother. But when angel of death Lydia Martin gives him her powers (and doesn’t know how to take them back), his life turns upside down. When Derek Hale, Lydia’s adoptive brother, destroys him in a fight and takes Lydia to the Soul Society, Stiles must embrace his newfound powers and venture into the world of the dead, hoping to save the girl he’s become attached to.

Stiles and Lydia in the 100? ‘Princess’ Lydia Martin and rebel king Stiles Stilinski are the unlikely leaders of a teenage gang stranded on a post-apocalyptic earth. 

Stiles and Lydia in Supergirl? Lydia Martin has been saving the city for a while now but when a futuristic alien boy (who may or may not be the reason why she ends up living in the 30th century in the future) barges into her mind to save her from the catatonic state she’s in, she starts thinking that it might not be so bad to know you have somebody to save you when you need it.

Stiles and Lydia in Gossip Girl? Lydia has always hated everything Brooklyn boy Stiles represented. Stiles is dating her friend Malia but he knows somewhere behind Lydia’s bonmot-tossing, label-whoring package of girly evil exterior, there’s an actual human soul. When they discover they share a lot of common interests, an unlikely friendship blossoms. Will Lydia let go of the toxic relationship she has with Jackson and embrace happiness she feels with Stiles?