#panemvision

[catindabag]

i saw this photo of coryo and lucy gray and it reminded me of your crack au:

the peacekeepers do not get paid enough to deal with the capitol's resident cabbage boy and his new best friend ✨lucy✨gray✨baird✨ practicing for panemvision

True! 😂 Peacekeeper Joe really needs a salary raise (ASAP) just for dealing with our crazy Mentors’ shenanigans! He at least has the right to judge them in front of their faces.

Sadly, most of Panem’s Peacekeeper budget and allowances were allocated to the ✨Bichon Frisé Puppy Party Program✨ last year. #BestGranGranEver #RavinstillRizz #justpresidentthings

[catindabag]

One of my THG buddies kept asking me about the fate of District 13 in my TBOSAS on Crack!AU yesterday. So this is just me clarifying some random D13 stuff in this weird universe.

So what happened to D13? Here are the facts:

D13 and its citizens are still alive and pretty much hiding from the Ravinstill Regime.

Funny thing is, all of the Capitol Nobles are well aware of the fact that D13 is still alive and kicking. Even Coryo and his scheming grandmother knew about D13’s fate after the Dark Days.

However, the Ancient and Noble House Ravinstill and their sacred Bichon Frisé puppies ordered everyone to pretend that District 13 doesn’t exist anymore.

This is to protect the last remaining working marbles of crazy President Ravinstill and Class President Felix.

So District 13 is now and forever officially renamed by the Capitol Nobles as the “Mole Kingdom” ruled by the mole people.

As long as you are a certified rebel who lives underground, you are now considered a “mole person” by the Capitol.

In short, all of Panem knows about the truth of D13 and its mole people. However, instead of confronting or siding with the remaining mole rebels, everyone just agreed to ignore the Mole Kingdom’s existence after the war.

Also, after the 24 OG Mentors ended the Hunger Games forever and replaced it with ✨Panemvision✨, President Ravinstill made sure that no mole person is allowed to join the competition for rebelling against him and his ✨Bichon Frisé Cult✨.

This is also a way to punish the mole kingdom for rebelling against the Ravinstill Regime and accidentally killing the ever gorgeous Crassus Xanthos Snow.

And yes, President Ravinstill is still sadly allergic to “freedom” and mole people.

But because of ✨The Great Mole Ban✨, the mole kingdom and its mole people are now angry at the fact that they can’t join and compete in ✨Panemvision✨ for fun.

All the Districts’ excited children are now busy volunteering themselves and their most talented individuals left and right for ✨Panemvision✨. The prize was just too good to pass. I mean, who wouldn’t want to win free money, a big house, and lots of food for one’s family and District?!

Meanwhile, the mole people are just stuck living in their little underground bunkers without any real entertainment to distract them from their impending doom.

Years later, in Katniss Everdeen’s timeline, ✨Panemvision✨ is still the best show in the history of Panem!🥳

The ✨SnowPlinth Dynasty✨ is now the most powerful and influential family ever.

Sejanus Plinth-Snow is still the beloved President of Panem.

Former President Felix Ravinstill retired early in order to take care of his 40 fluffy fat cats with Androcles Anderson and their 12 Hello Kitty loving children.

Festus and Persephone’s meat stew loving dumpster diving kids even married into the ✨SnowPlinth Dynasty✨. The Creeds and the Prices finally linked their crazy bloodline back with the Snows and the Ravinstills.

And yes, Coryo and Sejanus did have 24 kids (and more), making Strabo and Ma Plinth the happiest grandparents ever.

After Sejanus and Coryo’s oldest son married Festus and Persephone’s oldest daughter, ✨The Great Sandwich Quartet Alliance✨ was officially formed.

And when Sejanus and Coryo’s oldest daughter married Felix Ravinstill’s oldest son, ✨The Great Pact of The Royal Hello Kitty Blood✨ was finally signed and secured for the greater good of Panem.

Tigris is still a tiger. Lol. But at least she now has several available nephews and nieces to spoil and design clothes for.

The ever gorgeous “First Lady” Coryo Plinth-Snow is still busy taking care of their 40 Snowjanus grandchildren and 10 Snowjanus great grandchildren.

He is also known as the beloved ✨King of Roses✨ and the true ✨Sandwich Queen of Panem✨.

Festus Creed still dumpster dives with Pup, Sejanus, and Coryo every weekend.

Hilarius and Wovey are still the best apple berry pie dealers of the country.

Clemensia and Reaper are still praying for normalcy.

Dill is still the best Mayor of District 11 and the smartest best friend of Former President Felix Ravinstill.

Treech and Lamina are still providing the best firewood and axes for Vipsania and Gaius.

The old Capitol Zoo is still ruled by the “sacred” rabid raccoons and wild squirrels.

Tigris Snow is now the ✨Queen✨ of Panem’s fashion industry along with the Ring Twins and their ✨Pajama Onesie Empire✨.

Dennis and Hy are still the secret kings of Panem’s Black Market Industry.

Arachne is still suing for her ✨Sandwich Queen✨ title.

Iphigenia is now the most famous food merchant in Panem. But she still sucks at handling money.

Mizzen and Persephone are still the eternal rulers of their ✨Pizza Palace Empire✨ and the accursed junk food industry.

Seneca is now the current biggest disappointment of the Crane family for working as a professional pizza delivery guy for Mizzen and Percy’s infamous empire.

Livia and her annoying children are still running and ruling the largest bank of Panem.

Lucy Gray is still the reigning ✨Queen✨ of the Capitol’s entertainment and music industry.

Billy Taupe is still banned for life.

Palmyra Monty is still banned from cooking.

Androcles is still the best professional kleptomaniac to ever walk on earth.

The Covey and its growing members are now the most popular band of the country, making Katniss Everdeen a nepo baby by default.

Lucy Gray is still happily married to Panini Panlo and his hair curlers for fun. They now have 5 curly haired children and 12 music loving grandchildren.☺️

Maude Ivory is still illegally selling popcorn balls and cookies for extra cash.

Mockingjays and Jubilee’s kind are still banned from the Capitol because Coryo, Coral, Reaper, Urban, and Treech are still tragically allergic to weird talking birds.

Coral and Festus are still ✨war baddies✨ who do “martial arts” every Friday.

Marcus is still denying his own existence, but is now working under District 2’s beloved immortal Mayor, Mr. Rocky Rock O’Rolly.

Lysistrata and Domitia are still the proud leaders of the ✨SnowPlinth Fan Club✨.

Dancing King Tanner is still the reigning crazy Dairy King and Mayor of District 10. He happily married Domitia Whimsiwick and her cows to rule D10 forever.😎

And yes, Lizzie is still selling her illegal ✨miracle pills✨ for fun.

First Lady Coryo Plinth-Snow even started his own secret ✨Cabbage Soup & Lima Bean Cult✨ with Felix, Festus, and Pup. In truth, they just wanted their grandchildren and great grandchildren to become close friends.

Florus is still allergic to rain. However, he now knows how to use an umbrella without getting wet.

Pup is now living in a luxurious cruise ship with a couple of retired and underpaid sailors and Peacekeepers.

Urban and Io Jasper are still busy finding the shrouded mysteries of love and the secrets of the universe.

Juno and Bobbin are still throwing insults at each other. However, their children and grandchildren are good friends for some reason.

Brandy is still living her best werewolf life.

Poor Hilarius is currently fighting for his inheritance (again) because his rebellious nephew (Plutarch Heavensbee) just disowned him and his beloved chihuahua out of the blue for no reason at all.🥲

At least homeless Hilarius Heavensbee is now happily staying at the Presidential Palace as a temporary live-in nanny for Sejanus and Coryo’s grandchildren and great grandchildren.

And D13 is still planning to launch a second rebellion against President Plinth-Snow and his friends.

In truth, D13 and its unfortunate, sad, and deprived mole children are just really obsessed with ✨Panemvision✨. They have been loyally watching, subscribing, and following the most popular show in Panem since its weird birth. Since its debut! Since its first season! Since the day they saw crazy Lucy Gray tried to strangle and throw Mizzen the Gremlin offstage for almost ruining her best performance (ever).

Some mole children even tried to contact and convince President Sejanus and former President Felix that District 13 still exist. However, because of Ravinstill’s irreversible war trauma, they still haven’t gotten a single reply from the Capitol.🥲

Of course, their evil Mole President (Alma Coin) still wants to declare war against President Sejanus for some reason.

Honestly, Alma Coin just wants to control the country, imprison the 24 OG Mentors in a mental institution, and become the ✨Eternal Star of Panem✨.

But Seji Pie doesn’t even give a flying f*ck about District 13 and it’s rebellious mole children. He’s too busy making another child with Coryo to truly notice Alma Coin’s threats and messages.😌💅

Meanwhile, when little Prim was reaped for ✨Panemvision✨, Katniss Nepo Baby Everdeen immediately volunteered and stole her sweet sister’s spot.

However it’s not because she wanted to “save” her little sister from being “forced” to sing on stage, but because the ✨Girl on Fire✨ really wanted to compete and become the ✨Star of Panem✨ that year.

And because of that, little Primrose never forgave Katniss for stealing her only opportunity to join their ever famous crazy grandaunt (Lucy Gray) and her booming music business in the Capitol.

Prim even tried to contact Lucy Gray’s grumpy husband with Gale’s help, but old man Panlo thought that they were just trying to take his crazy wife’s life and money. So the Panini Man hanged up and blocked them from his phone.😂

So bitter Prim and her cat are now the first anti-fans of the ✨Girl on Fire✨.😔

On the other hand, when Peeta “I am the bread!” Mellark was reaped for ✨Panemvision✨, Gale “I can f*ckin’ sing!” Hawthorne immediately volunteered to be with Katniss.

So the baker’s boy had to challenge an angry Gale to a dance-off battle in front of an excited crowd in order to secure his spot for the competition. This is also his first and only chance to talk to Katniss Nepo Baby Everdeen. So he had to win no matter what.

Peeta only won after executing a perfect somersault and one flawless cartwheel in front of a drunk Haymitch and a bubbly Effie Trinket.

And jealous Gale became the founding father of the anti-Peeta Mellark Fan Club.

Meanwhile, old crazy lady Lucy Gray is still busy stealing her grumpy old husband’s hair curlers after every show. #PanBaird #lovelanguage #withPaniniPanlo

And the 24 OG Mentors and their former Tributes are still good friends who usually hangout every other week to cause some chaos and traffic in Panem.

Of course, old man Mizzen is still a little gremlin through and through. He is even the main reason why the 2nd rebellion failed and never happened.

Mole President Alma Coin and her loyal minions just can’t stand a chance against Mizzen the Gremlin, crazy Persephone Creed Née Price, and their ruthless Pizza Palace Empire.😈

“You can’t start a revolution, much less a 2nd rebellion without a merciless and efficient pizza delivery service!” - Mizzen.

[catindabag]

TBOSAS on Crack short take (45)

Strabo: My lady, I am finally glad to meet you again.

Grandma’am: Oh, yes. I remember you when you were just a strapping young lad fresh from the Districts.

Strabo: You do?

Grandma’am: Of course. How could I forget one of my late son’s favorite lovers?

Strabo: So you knew about us?

Grandma’am: My dear Crassus never once kept a secret from me.

Strabo: Even when it comes to his love life?

Grandma’am: Especially when it comes to his love life.😌💅

Strabo: So you knew about the time when we-

Grandma’am: Secretly snuck out from the military base and went “stargazing” because you two were bored?😏

Strabo: Oh, Panem, Horn of Plenty, you knew about that?!

Grandma’am: Of course! When I said everything, I meant everything.😈

Strabo: My lady, Crassus and I-

Grandma’am: Mr. Plinth, might I remind you that this meeting is not about you and Crassus. This meeting is about my grandson and your only son and heir.

Strabo: Of course. You may continue, my lady.

Grandma’am: Very well, Mr. Plinth. Let me make this very simple. Your foolish son is in love.

Strabo: Yes.

Grandma’am: With my gorgeous wishful grandson.

Strabo: Correct.

Grandma’am: The Snows have the old and respectable Capitol name and influence.

Strabo: True.

Grandma’am: And you Plinths have the money and munitions.

Strabo: Also true.

Grandma’am: We both know that our true goal is to rule Panem through the ✨Plinth-Snow Dynasty✨, correct?

Strabo: Very much.😈

Grandma’am: So there is only one thing that we must do to achieve our goals.

Strabo: Yes. A union- no. A ✨Royal Wedding✨ and an unforgettable marriage between Sejanus and Coriolanus that will change Panem forever!😈

Grandma’am: Exactly!

Strabo: And then we could get rid of that greedy Monster Cardew and those shady Ravinstills!

Grandma’am: As well as that pesky Highbottom who keeps calling me at night just to cry about my dear Crassus!

Strabo: And then we can replace those useless ✨Government Bichon Puppy Loving Bureaucrats✨ who were randomly appointed by President Ravinstill for fun!

Grandma’am: And hire the right fools who would do our dirty work for us!😈

Strabo: My son shall be the future ✨President of Panem✨!

Grandma’am: And my grandson will be the face of our beautiful dynasty!

Strabo: Then they will give me a dozen grandchildren with the looks of the ever gorgeous Crassus Xanthos!

Grandma’am: And everyone will be enthralled by their beauty!

Strabo: While we rule Panem from the shadows! *evil laughs*

Grandma’am: And then we can lower the food prices and the housing market! *evil laughs*

Strabo: And host our own games!

Grandma’am: A talent show that will take the world by storm!

Strabo: And we will call it-

Grandma’am: ✨PANEMVISION!!✨

Tigris: So. . . Who wants tea?😀

[catindabag]

The fourth set of ✨Academy Photos✨ in my TBOSAS Crack!AU. Here’s PART 1, PART 2, & PART 3.

PS: A certain Mentor (Festus) secretly gave the Tributes a camera to share in order to quench their boredom while waiting for the final verdict that would change Panem forever. (AKA: The great trial to stop/revamp the Hunger Games and replace it with ✨Panemvision✨). Enjoy~.

Sabyn, Facet, and Velvereen pretending to enjoy Palmyra Monty’s infamous expired family pie before being rushed to Dennis Fling’s Black Market clinic again to recover. #barelysurvived #send #sorrows #prayers #foodpoisonedby #PalmyrafreakingMonty

Domitia Whimsiwick laughing at Festus Creed (at the back) because of his failure to buy booze and chocolates for the group. The convenience store clerk thought Creed was just 15 years old and almost got him arrested for illegally buying alcohol as a minor. #Festusfails #Felixhelpus #almostgotarrested #again

Velvereen, Facet, Dill, and Mizzen hiding at the back of the school kitchen while waiting for their Mentors to empty out the food pantry again. #atfancyschool #washungry #needthatheavenbread #withMizzenthegremlin

Bobbin (Corn Poppy) being forced by Coral and Wovey to go with Coryo and Sejanus to an underground dance competition, just because he can backflip and do somersaults for fun. #weneedcash #dancedancebaby #Snowjanus #masterplan #withBobbinCornPoppy

Bobbin (Corn Poppy) with a very happy Coryo Snow. They won the underground dance competition and got some extra cash for the Tributes. Also, a jealous Sejanus took the photo out of spite. Now Bobbin is on Plinth’s hit list for touching his sugar baby fiancé without permission. #wewonbaby #wehavecash #Snowjanus #masterplan #youbetterwatchout #BobbinCornPoppy #Coryoismine!

Clemensia Dovecote got caught reading a banned book that was once owned by Dean Casca Highbottom when he was still dating the ever gorgeous Crassus Xanthos Snow. #allaboutlove #Crasca4Ever #bannedbook #gotanotherdemerit #sorrynotsorry

Mizzen the gremlin and Brandy Sharp Candy trying to act normal and posing for their respective Districts while touring the old Capitol train station with their Mentors. Honestly, they just want food and souvenirs to bring back home. #choochoo #nomoreHungerGames #touringtheCapitol #withourMentors #PercyPrice&rice

Facet and Velvereen posing inside Livia’s gigantic walk-in closet. They were the only Tributes to be invited by Mama Cardew because of their ✨fashionista✨ status. #Bestlooking #Tributes #DistrictOneforthewin #sponsoredbyMamaCardew #wegotthebanksbaby

[catindabag]

✨Mizzen The Terrible Little Gremlin✨ and his different reactions in my TBOSAS on Crack!AU.

When he first met his Mentor (Persephone “Percy” Price).

When Percy Price “accidentally” told him about the Maid Stew Incident.

When he stole and ate little Wovey’s last cookie without remorse. #sorrynotsorry

Real footage of when Mizzen first ate a slice of the Capitol’s best bacon pizza in the area.

Him trying to persuade the pizza delivery guy to leave the Capitol and move to District 4 after ending the Hunger Games.

When Coral caught him stealing and eating her “sponsored” cheeseburgers in secret.

When he finally learned about the plans for ✨Operation Felix✨ and ✨Panemvision✨ from Dill and Percy.

Real footage of Mizzen and Percy’s final performance on the ✨Lucky Flickerman Show✨ to gain more sponsors. #takethatLucyGray! #gremlin&price

Mizzen after his and Percy’s “magnificent” interview with Lucky Flickerman.

When he realized that ✨Panemvision✨ is a singing contest and not a swimming or eating competition. #curseyouLucyGray!

[catindabag]

✨Reaper “I’m normal” Ash✨ and his different reactions in my TBOSAS on Crack!AU.

When he first met the 4 drunken Mentors (Coryo, Sejanus, Lizzie, and Festus) in the train station.

When he first met his very normal (not crazy) looking Mentor (Clemensia Dovecote).

When he realized that he has to live, interact, eat, and room with 22 other crazy idiots in the same enclosure.

Every time he sees traitor Dill and freaking Felix Ravinstill being buddy buddies.

Every time he sees Mizzen the gremlin and crazy Lucy Gray scheming for attention.

When he and Clemensia had to make an actual “working” strategy to get more sponsors.

When he finally learned about ✨Operation Felix✨ and ✨Panemvision✨ from Dill.

When his own family and District disowned him and his “embarrassing ass” for getting the least amount of sponsors.

When he was forced by Dill and Clemensia to show his amazing “hidden talents” in front of Lucky Flickerman and his audience (again).

His overall experience as a Tribute in this year’s games/singing contest/Panemvision.

[catindabag]

This short post is just all about Lamina and her different reactions in my TBOSAS Crack!AU.

Lol. This was just created for a good friend, I swear. Enjoy?

When Lamina first met the 4 drunken Mentors (Coryo, Sejanus, Lizzie, and Festus) at the train station.

When the 4 drunken Mentors gave her a gift basket, a sandwich, and a bag of cookies as a “Welcome to the Capitol” present.

When she realized that the 4 dumb drunks are actually HG Mentors, who are unfortunately responsible for the Tributes’ welfare.

When she finally met her Mentor (Pup).

When Mizzen the Gremlin stole and ate her bag of cookies.

When Lucy Gray stole and drank her 2 gallons of orange juice.

When she got bullied by Velvereen and company for crying too much.

When Dill finally told her about the super secret ✨Operation Felix✨.

When she finally heard the news that their crazy Mentors had actually ended the Hunger Games and revamped it into a weird talent show competition called ✨Panemvision✨.

When she realized that her “talents” are only limited to climbing trees and swinging axes.

[catindabag]

What happens when crazy old lady Lucy Gray and Katniss meet each other will they have some kind of singing of test like the rainbow songbird vs the mockingjay and in the zoo is there at least one rabid raccoon squirrel hybrid living there now

Oh, Panem, Horn of Plenty! Katniss “Nepo Baby” Everdeen will literally bow down before Lucy Gray and her grumpy husband, Panini Panlo when D12’s local ✨girl on fire✨ finally meets them in person.

Also, Panini Panlo will probably scold Katniss for stealing her little sister’s only opportunity to compete in Panemvision. #justice4Prim #primcansingbetterthantheswamppotato #antivolunteer #fightforbuttercuprights

At least poor Peeta can finally learn how to bake “real” bread from Peepaw Pan Pan and crazy old lady Sheaf the Chief.

As for the rabid raccoons and feral squirrels, they’re still the sacred creatures of the Capitol (and all of Panem after Felix Ravinstill became the “regent” President). So by law, it’s illegal to cage, hunt, and/or kill them no matter what they do to you or your family. Moreover, the rabid raccoons are also being protected by the Ravinstill Capitol Act 7070.

However, R.C.A 7070 does not apply to those who officially identify themselves as wannabe “werewolves” (Nero Price and Brandy) because of the ongoing controversial feud between the two groups.

Lastly, as for the Capitol Zoo, it’s now fixed and running like a real “functioning” zoo since Gaius Breen became the head of his family.

And as long as you ignore the ✨Bichon Frisé Puppy Paradise Enclosure✨, it’s totally worth your time and money.😉

[catindabag]

✨Treech the Leech✨ and his different reactions in my TBOSAS on Crack!AU.

When he first met his crazy gym bro Mentor (Vipsania “Ney Ney” Sickle).

When he and Hy snuck out of the zoo to attend an illegal underground boxing match with Vipsania and Dennis.

Whenever he sees Mizzen the little gremlin committing another “ food crime against humanity” in front of a pissed off Coral.

Real footage of when Treech and Vipsania trained for President Ravinstill’s annual ✨Bake & Brawl Competition✨.

Real footage of Treech and Vipsania’s spectacular performance on the Lucky Flickerman Show. #gymbrosforever

Whenever he sees poor Lamina crying.

When he heard about ✨Operation Felix✨ and ✨Panemvision✨ from Dill and Ney Ney.

When he realized that ✨Panemvision✨ is really happening (It’s for real, bro!) and that he’s about to sing live on TV for all of Panem to see.

Every time he sees Jessup and Sheaf talking to the rabid raccoons and treating them like real people. #CrazyCapitolCulture

When he saw Tanner backflipped while holding a jug of beer to impress the Capitol crowd and gain more sponsors.

[catindabag]

So how is Haymitch in your AU like what he does he do now like is he dramatic and crazy beer lover or just a what is going on with my life wanting normal again beer lover and is he in a relationship with his his mentor or Effie or both or is he still single and has he met Reaper and Clemmie yet and join the praying for normalcy club

Haymitch is very happy and very chill in my tbosas on crack!au. I mean, he did win Panemvision and became that year’s ✨Star of Panem✨ along with his very eccentric Mentor, Cassius Perseus Plinth-Snow-Creed-Price (the oldest grandson of Sejanus, Coryo, Festus, and Persephone).

So yeah, Mr. Abernathy is quite rich, popular, and happy. I mean, his family and girlfriend (now wife in Katniss Everdeen’s timeline) are also well-off and living their best selling illegal alcohol and coal with the “help” of crazy old lady Maude Ivory.

Moreover, Haymitch is good friends with Cassius Perseus P.S.C.P and Lycaon Lysander Vickers (the oldest grandson of Lysistrata Vickers).

Nevertheless, our three idiots (H.C.L) became certified drinking buddies after a very drunk Haymitch Abernathy won Panemvision (yes, he was drunk when he performed on stage) and “defeated” Maysilee Donner and her Capitol Mentor, Critonius Dovecote (the youngest son of Clemensia Dovecote).

On the other hand, Effie Trinket is still an official escort but she works under the Ring Twins (and their children and grandchildren) as a pajama onesie model.

Unfortunately, Reaper and Clemensia are not friends with Haymitch because they were aggressively rooting (and secretly sponsoring) for Critonius and Maysilee to win Panemvision and the ✨Star of Panem✨ title at that time. . . and because Haymitch does not fit their “normalcy” criteria. So that’s that.😌

PS: This is basically Reaper Ash every time he sees Haymitch, Cassius, and Lycaon getting drunk together and having fun:

[catindabag]

In your Au in the future who is Katniss Nepo Baby Everdeen mentor who is also her duet for her performance is it Haymitch, Effie or is it a capitol student a descendant of Sejanus and Coryo and what is Katniss usually like other than being way happier and pretty much getting everything she ever wanted and needed

Oh, Panem, Horn of Plenty. The crack!AU Everdeen timeline is gonna be a mess.😂

Fortunately, Katniss “Nepo Baby” Everdeen is not gonna be like her super famous crazy singing rainbow bird grand aunt (Lucy Gray) because our ✨Girl on Fire✨ will have the same serious personality as her canon self.

But she’s also going to volunteer steal poor little Prim’s spot (out of spite and for fun) as D12’s official ✨Panemvision Female Tribute✨💅.

Unfortunately, Catnip’s greatest rivals will be Glimmer (D1’s youngest and fairest opera singer), Cato (D2’s hottest theatre nerd and rock whispering prodigy) and Clove (D2’s youngest broadway musical genius).

Moreover, Peeta Mellark (who whistles like a pro) will be Katniss Everdeen’s official “duet partner” because her extremely gorgeous Capitol Mentor, Seginus Cadmus Plinth-Snow-Creed-Price (AKA: the gorgeous grandson of Coryo, Sejanus, Festus, and Persephone) got stuck in a dusty broom closet with poor sensitive Philip Anthony Ravinstill-Anderson (AKA: the wacky socialite grandson of Felix and Androcles).😅

Nevertheless, here are some other interesting “facts” in this weird timeline:

1. Primrose and Buttercup (the crusty cat) are the unapologetically ruthless founders and leaders of the infamous Anti-Katniss Everdeen Fan Club. #antivolunteer #realroseofD12

2. Poor Peeta had to fight a jealous Gale Hawthorne (via dance off battle) in order to defend his “rights” as D12’s official male Tribute for the upcoming Panemvision competition.

3. Crazy Lucy Gray married Panini Panlo for fun. She also had a lot of kids with him for fun.

4. Coryo and President Sejanus are still madly in love with each other even after the birth of their 35th grandchild.😍😂

5. Hilarius Heavensbee is the favorite nanny of Sejanus and Coryo’s grandchildren.

6. Glimmer is a very popular opera singer in D1 because of Facet and Velvereen’s influence.

7. Rue can’t sing to save her life because of Reaper Ash (but don’t ask why).😔

8. Foxface is the “Hannah Montana” of her District.

9. Brandy is still a self proclaimed werewolf.

10. Sejanus is still the President of Panem because of Coryo, Festus, Lizzie, Felix, and Clemmie’s collective insistence. #SejiPieforlife

11. Tigris is still a fashionista cheese merchant.

12. Mizzen the Gremlin and Percy Price are still the ruthless rulers of their Pizza Palace Empire.

13. Festus Creed still dumpster dives with Coryo and Pup for fun.

14. Effie Trinket is half Ravinstill.

15. Haymitch Abernathy’s Capitol Mentor, Cassius Perseus Plinth-Snow-Creed-Price is the oldest grandson of Sejanus, Coryo, Festus, and Persephone.

16. Finnick Odair’s Capitol Mentor, Faustina Pleione Creed-Price is the youngest daughter of Festus and Persephone.

17. Lysistrata is still the proud leader of the SnowPlinth Fan Club.

18. Dill is still the Mayor of D11.

19. Reaper Ash is still looking for “normalcy.”

20. Lamina is still crying because of Lucy Gray, Coral, and Mizzen.

21. Half of Sejanus and Coryo’s children and grandchildren have “Complete Heterochromia” for some reason (one blue, one brown).

22. The Plinth-Snow Dynasty is still the most powerful and influential family in Panem thanks to old scheming Strabo and the Grandma’am.

23. Mags and Mizzen are cousins.

24. Maude Ivory is still busy selling and reselling popcorn balls with Mrs. Everdeen (illegally).

25. One of Sejanus and Coryo’s gorgeous sons (Cepheus) married Panlo and Lucy Gray’s youngest daughter (Poppy) because of ✨love✨ political reasons.😏

[catindabag]

✨Dill with the Drill✨ and her different reactions in my TBOSAS on Crack!AU.

Dill when she met her very normal, very sweet “totally not a Ravinstill” Mentor (Felix Ravinsill) for the very first time.

When she realized that her perfect Mentor (Philip Raven’s Bill) was actually a Ravinstill.😫

When she finally forgave poor sensitive Felix for being born a freaking Ravinstill.

When Felix told her about ✨Operation Felix✨ and ✨Panemvision✨.

Whenever she sees Reaper Ash praying and begging for “normalcy” over and over again.

When she finally saw Reaper slowly losing his last remaining marbles because of Lucy Gray and Mizzen’s very existence.

Real footage of poor Felix and Dill “rehearsing” for the final Lucky Flickerman Interview.

Whenever she sees Reaper and Clemensia trying and failing to secure a sponsor for their team. They won’t get one. Not on her watch.

Dill every time she forgets to drink her daily “totally legal, totally legit” ✨Miracle Pills✨.

When she saw a very nervous Reaper Ash being forced by an equally very nervous Clemensia to show off his “hidden talents” on stage.

[catindabag]

TBOSAS Crack! Take: How Casca & Crassus “Accidentally” Made Panemvision.

Ok. First off, this is just purely for the laughs after a lot of late night drunken shenanigans with some friends. Also, this take was inspired by that Hunger Games + Eurovision post by the-fatal-impact (here). And after watching that Netflix Eurovision movie, The Story of Fire Saga, I think it’s about time to create this HG AU, featuring the Capitol’s No. 1 karaoke party loving delinquents, the irresistible drop dead gorgeous Crassus Snow and his dramatic boyfriend, Casca Highbottom.😂

Heads Up: In this AU, the first 9 Hunger Games still stayed the same (with all the killing and suffering) because Dr. Gaul and her team altered the final thesis paper of Crassus & Casca out of spite.

I mean, the insane doctor definitely loved the first half of the paper about a bunch of District kids competing. However, when she got to the singing contest part, she almost tried to burn their “accursed” paper to bits. She also even wanted to strangle her top idiot students for having the audacity to propose such ludicrous nonsense to her.

But after some deliberations, Dr. Gaul decided to grudgingly keep half of their original ideas and added her own sadistic twist to the game. Of course, her “changes” were approved by her team in order to “properly” punish the rebels. But honestly, this is the only way to finally kick the two karaoke addicts out of her life by letting them graduate.

However, years later, everything changed when the Game Makers added a bunch of borderline insane delinquent students from The Academy (of Arts) as Mentors for the 10th Hunger Games, not knowing that a poor cabbage boy named Coriolanus Snow kept a copy of his dead father’s final thesis proposal (AKA: the infamous ✨Panemvision✨ paper that Dr. Gaul wanted to burn), and is ready to change the Hunger Games forever in the name of love money.😌💅

So here’s how it happened:

So one sunny afternoon, Dr. Gaul asked all of her graduating students to create a punishment for one’s enemies so extreme that they would never be allowed to forget how they had wronged you. At first, they were all concerned and confused. Some even got worried for a second. However, they all quickly started brainstorming when their teacher threatened to fail and expel them from the University (of Arts).

Of course, Casca Highbottom was not thrilled by their predicament, even though he really wanted to graduate with his best friend/secret boyfriend, Crassus. So instead of doing the assignment, he just went to their favorite Nightclub to get roaring drunk.

But the ever gorgeous Crassus Snow was not having any of his boyfriend’s BS. Casca promised him that they would graduate together since the first grade! Since their first kiss! Since the day Casca asked him out on a date! So Snow followed his BFF to Pluribus Bell’s Nightclub.

When Crassus got there, Casca was already drunk AF. He tried to convince his very drunk boyfriend to go home with him and work on their assignment. He even offered to carry him back. Alas, nothing worked.

Casca refused to go along with Snow’s sassy excuses and threatened to throw pink confettis at him.

However, after some back and forth arguments, Casca finally gave in when Crassus threatened to breakup with him.

But before they leave, Highbottom demanded Snow to drink one glass or two, and sing at least 10 songs of his choosing to celebrate their last “hurrah” as University students.

So they did. They got roaring drunk. They sang their freaking hearts out, and annoyed Pluribus Bell and his patrons nonstop. Some even claimed that their late night karaoke shenanigans disturbed President Ravenstill’s beauty sleep.

So after singing Heaven is a Place on Earth and Snow On The Beach , they finally decided to write their last assignment on a piece of napkin. They also decided to name their paper ✨The Hunger Games: Panemvision!✨

Basically, Panemvision is a “game” where a bunch of randomly chosen District kids (between the ages of 12 to 18) compete in a spectacular singing contest (whether they’re talented or not) to help their respective District receive food bonuses and other perks from the Capitol.

They also agreed to place a “no killing, no gore, no cannibalism” policy to force the losers to live with their humiliation on LIVE TV forever.

And that is how you properly punish your enemies by recording and broadcasting them live on television for all of Panem to see and remember. However, if you’re talented, you’re basically safe from the inevitable humiliation.

Moreover, drunk!Crassus Snow insisted that they have to write all of it down inside their favorite nightclub to immortalized their last moments as the “Wild Karaoke Duo Delinquents of the Capitol.”

The next day, the couple woke up in Casca’s bed, naked. No one really knows what happened to their clothes, but future historians agreed that the two drunk idiots threw them in front of the Presidential Palace by accident.

And let’s just say that last night ended in a mystery, and it will stay a mystery until the Mockingjay sings.

Alas, when the two idiots finally had the courage to face and ask Dr. Gaul about their assignment, which they accidentally sent to her last night, she only told them that their paper was so obnoxiously stupid and unforgivably ridiculous. It may even start a different kind of “revolution” if their moronic ideas will see the light of day.

However, Dr. Gaul did confess that the first part of their paper was quite interesting. But as for the rest, they might as well burn to ashes.

Well, who cares! They still miraculously graduated with flying colors at the end of the day. Their professors even gave them a special award for writing and presenting their crazy thesis paper in front of the class.

Then the infamous ✨Crasca University Breakup✨ happened, and everything started to go downhill for both Snow and Highbottom.

Casca even became so depressed when he heard that his former lover, Crassus Snow decided to date a rich older businessman from District 2 named Strabo Plinth just to spite him.

Years later, after the First Rebellion, and after General Crassus Snow’s unfortunate death, the Capitol was in control again!

Dr. Gaul implemented her own version of the Hunger Games to punish the Districts for their treasonous actions. She also made Casca Highbottom the new Dean of The Academy (of Arts) out of spite.

And the true reason why Highbottom became a morphling addict was because of his former lover’s death. Also, he greatly despises Strabo Plinth (and his son) for some reason. #Crasca4Ever

But have no fear! Our poor cabbage boy, Coriolanus Snow and his crazy Mentor friends will eventually change the course of history by reintroducing the “real” version of the Hunger Games. Panemvision will rise and dominate the world and District 13 can stay mad and sad forever because they’re not allowed to join the fun!

That’s what you get for starting a war, District 13! No ✨Panemvision✨ for you!

[catindabag]

If anyone wants to read my other TBOSAS Crack!AU (AKA: The world where Dean Casca Highbottom and Crassus Xanthos Snow accidentally made ✨The Hunger Games: Panemvision✨), feel free to READ IT HERE.😏