#people talk a lot about golden girls plot lines that were really progressive for the time

[a9saga]

what about that episode of the golden girls where blanche's daughter wants to undergo artificial insemination because she wants to have a baby even though there isn't a man or anyone she wants to have one with, meanwhile dorothy's mother sophia is trying to avoid going to the doctor against dorothy's wishes. and it takes some time for blanche to come around on the idea of her daughter having a baby alone, but when she finally comes around to going to the sperm bank if the gals will go with her, sophia's like "ohhh boy we're goin to the sperm bank 😈😈😈" and dorothy's like "you're not going anywhere if you're not going to the doctor first" and sophia huffs like "😒 all right fine! I'll go to the doctor but this better be one great sperm bank 😤"

[galactichoneybee92]

Disorganized Thoughts on Sex Education Season 3

I binge watched the entirety of season 3 on Friday, and after sitting with it for a couple days, I have composed myself enough to offer some thoroughly disorganized thoughts on what I’ve seen. 

     While I did enjoy many things about this season, I don’t understand the people who claim it was the strongest. In fact, I believe that it was the weakest. I don’t know what exactly happened during the delay, but I swear they have to have lost staff. Writers, perhaps editors? Whoever usually reins things in a bit, keeps the show grounded, and everyone in character. Whoever had that job, they’re either gone, or they’ve just stopped giving a fuck which, while relatable, is unfortunate in regards to this show. Now what do I mean by that? Let me elaborate:

1. This season was gross. And I don’t mean in general, like I didn’t like it. No, I mean that the writers decided that being sexually explicit wasn’t funny enough and decided to add just a fuck-ton of fart jokes and toilet humor. And I get it, okay? This show prides itself on being crass. But you can be crass without being disgusting. I acknowledge that this comes entirely down to personal preference, but I can’t stand toilet humor and I feel like this season really ramped it up. Every episode was someone farting or talking about shit, or that god forsaken thrice cursed bus scene. Sex doesn’t gross me out, talk about sex all fucking day I don’t care, but I don’t need to watch an extended scene of someone digging their own shit out of a bus toilet in a sock and chucking it out the window onto someone’s car. And even just smaller things, like Aimee talking about the flour constipating her or her taking a massive shit in Jean’s toilet when she and Maureen were there. Those scenes weren’t necessary for the plot in any way, which leads me to believe they were just there because someone thought they were funny and if that’s you’re thing go off, but it most definitely isn’t mine. 

2. Ruby and Otis. And more importantly, what was the point of Ruby and Otis? Now don’t get me wrong, I like Ruby as a character and I found their relationship interesting. And I think that it would have been even more interesting if the writers had devoted more time to properly developing it- Ruby was getting better as a person but she wasn’t there yet. I liked it once Otis started standing up for himself more, and demanding respect in the relationship and as she started to actually care for him she did come to treat him more respectfully. I think with more time they could have been really good. But they didn’t get that time- she said she loved him and they didn’t even work through that fiasco before he was kissing Maeve at a gas station. Overall it had a lot of potential but the way they played it left me just sitting here like...why? Like from a narrative standpoint what was even the purpose? Because from where I’m sitting it really only served as yet another roadblock standing between Otis and Maeve and even though I shipped them like CRAZY in season 1 and 2 the constant unnecessary roadblocks are getting a little old. Which leads me to my next point...

3. Why was Maeve and Otis so unsatisfying? That’s not actually a rhetorical question, I can tell you: Because the writers put so little effort into what is supposed to be the main couple on the show. I feel like they put more effort into keeping them apart and then when it comes time to put them together they’re just kind of like NOW KISS, they only talk like once after and then they ship Maeve off to America. Now I’ve heard rumors that Emma Mackey might not want to return to the show for season 4 so if I had to guess at all of this I would say that both this point and the last was a sloppy attempt to cover their asses in the event that they can’t get her to sign back on. If she does return, they can explore the relationship between her and Otis in season 4. If she doesn’t, they’re probably going to put him back with Ruby. But they couldn’t just write her off without at least touching on the relationship they spent the past 2 seasons building, even though Otis and Maeve barely interact in this season, which is frankly another reason why it felt so shoddy. They spent exponentially more time talking to other people and then half the time when Otis was talking to her he was super cringe. 

     Overall, despite loving their relationship initially, the characters have changed so much from their original dynamic, and have interacted so little, that I really don’t even know what’s pulling these characters together. It’s disappointing to admit that I’m kind of over it but honestly even the writers don’t feel invested. it kind of feels like they put them together because the audience expected it and after 3 seasons of anticipation the payoff was generally underwhelming. 

4. Otis. Just...Otis. I understand that Otis was introduced as being a very nice helpful character in season one. He was the quintessential good guy. And then in season 2 he got to explore being a douche for a bit- which is fine. He is a teenager and he was going through some shit. But I really felt that by the end of season 2 he should have resolved that particular plot point. And he was a little better in season 3 I guess? But he didn’t really progress until the end of this season and from a writing standpoint I feel like they really dragged that out for too long. 

5. What’s with this show and it’s hard on for cheating? Like seriously, why does almost every relationship have some kind of infidelity. Like, were Otis and Ruby officially broken up when he kissed Maeve? Maeve certainly hadn’t broken up with Isaac, and this was almost directly on the heels of their very emotional sex scene. There was the issue with Jean and Jakob last season, and Eric cheating on Rahim with Adam. And then Eric (for some reason) cheating on Adam this season with random Nigerian dude whose name I can’t remember. Just...why is this a thing? 

     But also can we just talk about how weird the break up was? And out of left field? Like they literally spent the whole season developing their relationship, and then they get to Nigeria and after hiding the whole time he is subtly able to talk about Adam to his grandmother. And he sounds so proud, and so nice when he’s doing so, and not at all like he’s planning to end this wonderful relationship he’s describing. And then when he gets back, guilty after cheating on said boyfriend (like he should be) he asks Adam, seemingly as a test, if he would go out to a club with him. And Adam says no because that isn’t his scene and like...Eric knows that isn’t his scene. But at the same time, I feel like if Eric had sat him down and been like “You don’t have to wear makeup or dress outlandishly, just come to the club with me because it’s important to me” I really think Adam would have gone. And if the clothes and make-up were a dealbreaker like...why? You know who you’re dating. And while wanting him to tell his mom isn’t an overwhelmingly outrageous request, when you start getting into his physical appearance then that’s just actually trying to change him as a person and that’s just a really shitty thing to do. 

6. I promise there will be some positives in this list at some point but before that...what the fuck Eric? Like, I understand that Eric wants to get out there and explore his options, find someone more comfortable doing the things that he wants to go do. That’s realistic I guess, your high school relationships don’t work out and just because Adam came out for him he still isn’t obligated to stay in a relationship with him. But from a fictional narrative standpoint? What the fuck is this? Adam and Eric were one of the most popular ships on the show. They have been foreshadowed since season one, and had so so much effort put into developing them both as characters. Adam has come such a long way. They have brought him so far out of him comfort zone that Adam in season 3 is almost a completely different person to Adam in season 1. They spent so much of this season further developing the relationship they established last season, and for what? To break them up at the very end? WHY? 

7. Following on the heels of point 6, Aimee and Steve. They didn’t need to break up. I understand the direction the writers were taking this- Aimee wants to be single for a while to fully process her trauma and get to know her own body again. And that’s valid. I just don’t like it because I very strongly suspect that she will have a new love interest next season and that all her stuff about being single isn’t going to be shown. It will all happen off screen during whatever time skip they employ between seasons and then they’re going to use the fact that she is single to introduce a new more dramatic love interest for her since golden retriever boy Steve wasn’t interesting enough for them. Maybe that’s just me being cynical but if anyone can come out of season 3 NOT feeling a little cynical it would probably be a miracle. 

8. A positive! Finally a positive! I love the relationship between Adam and Rahim. Do I want them to date? Not particularly. I wouldn’t be mad if it happens, but I really just like them as like awkward begrudging friends. Some of my favorite scenes this season were the interactions between the two of them (Once again, the disgusting bus ride notwithstanding) I like Rahim a lot more when he isn’t interrupting my ship (which is a habit of mine. I liked Ola a lot more once she broke up with Otis) 

9. I don’t think Viv was out of character. Some people have been saying that she was, but I don’t think so. She has always been ambitious and even Jackson understand that about her in the show. And even when she was working for Hope and carrying out her rules, she was never an antagonist because she never gave up her personal morals to do it. For example, when Hope had them divided into boy and girl lines, Jackson asked her where Cal should go. She told him that boys went to the left and girls went to the right but as soon as Cal was like “Im not a boy or a girl,” Viv was immediately like, “ Oh! Right! Let me ask Hope.” She approached the situation in a way that made it clear that she recognized this issue as a legitimate problem and when she went to Hope it wasn’t framed like “This person is being an issue refusing to choose,” but instead like “We didn’t account for this possibility, that was our bad. How should we fix it?” Later on, on the class trip, Viv even lied to Hope and told her everything was fine because she didn’t want to get anyone in trouble. Viv took the opportunities presented to her, but I never interpreted it as her being an antagonist in any way. 

10. I love that Viv and Jackson remained friends, and I love that Viv has her sexy long-distance boyfriend who sexts about wheat XD Her sexting was one of my favorite scenes- well written, laugh out loud hilarious. No complaints. Sexy boyfriend was indeed very sexy and honestly, Viv absolutely deserves him. 

11. Mr. Groff better apologize to Adam next season, or at the very least have any kind of fucking conversation with his son at all or else why the fuck did I watch SO MANY scenes developing him as a sympathetic character? They could have spent that time developing ANYONE, but instead we were focused on him so like...I’m going to need some kind of payoff. Make it relevant

12. I want more bonding scenes between Adam and Maureen. I love Maureen- I love her friendship with Jean and I love how she always chooses her son over  her estranged husband (as she should) I especially love her very loving and supportive relationship with Adam, even though Adam is terrible at communication. It’s a self indulgent wish, I’d just like to see more. 

13. Isaac. I made many posts after the season 2 release, about how much I despised Isaac. Unlike Ola, I find that I didn’t have a complete change of heart but I don’t hate him AS MUCH as I did before. I still don’t like him though and while you might think “Yeah but you hate anyone who stands in the way of Otis and Maeve” no. This is historically accurate and yet, this season? Not true. For example, I don’t hate Ruby. Do I think her inclusion in the story was handled poorly in a way that made the entire plot point unnecessary? Yes I do. I also feel that way about Isaac, but less so because I feel like the relationship between him and Maeve deepening was better foreshadowed and was kind of the natural conclusion given the events of the previous season. As a character though, I still don’t really like him, and after 2 seasons of him I don’t think it has anything to do with him interfering with Maeve’s relationship with Otis- I just legitimately don’t like him. And I don’t like him with Maeve. I think the biggest irritant this season was the way that, after confessing about deleting the message he was like “yeah I fucked up but only because I like you so much, just forgive me” And then at one point I believe I remember Maeve apologizing to him for her reaction to everything. But then when he found out that she kissed Otis (admittedly a shitty thing to do) he got so mad and like, held a fucking grudge about it. And I get it, he has a right to be mad, but also boy you were the one groveling like 2 episodes ago get over yourself. They both fucked up in different ways but he acts like he has the moral high ground all the time and it gets really annoying. I don’t know, maybe I’m letting my general dislike of the character color my perception of events, but this show has managed to change my opinion on characters before but it still hasn’t made me like him so I think it’s just not going to. 

14. What the hell were they trying to do with Hope? Like legitimately, what? Because I can’t quite figure it out. And that’s mostly because I feel like they were trying to make her a nuanced and sympathetic villain, but they broke a cardinal rule- To make a villain sympathetic you must also ensure that nothing they do is inherently irredeemable. For example, principal Groff. He was a grade A dick for the past 2 seasons but I still feel that, now that we have a sympathetic backstory, if handled properly he could still come back from this. He can see the error of his ways and if he works really really hard to make amends to his family he could perhaps have his character turned around. In Hope’s case however, I would argue that they did makes her nuanced, but failed to make her sympathetic because as a character she went too far. If they had stuck to her just being a general tyrant of a headmaster - enforcing strict rules and regulations but doing so out of insurmountable pressure from her own bosses -  and then softened us towards the character by showing us her willingness to help Maeve get a scholarship, her troubled marriage, and her inability to conceive, it could have worked. The trouble is when they brought in her racism and general bigotry. Those weren’t flaws brought on by stress, those were deeply rooted character flaws that the character isn’t going to overcome because by the end of the season the character hasn’t even admitted them to herself. The issues were addressed by others, but not by Hope herself, leaving me to believe that the character herself still views them as a nonissue. I would be very surprised if she even appears in season 4 and moreso if they manage to even half-way redeem her. I’m relatively certain we won’t see her again, which makes me question the effort put into her character development. 

15. I like Jakob as a character, I don’t like him as a love interest for Jean, but I LOVE him as a father figure for Otis. It’s very conflicting because I want him to stay in Otis’s life, but I don’t like him as a romantic interest for Jean. also it’s pretty clear he isn’t Joy’s father so that’s going to be an awkward fucking conversation. If she even tells him. The way the show is going I kind of feel like she won’t, or will at least put it off for as long as possible. 

16. I want more interaction between Otis and Jean. Positive interaction, not just her being intrusive or Otis being a little bitch. I like their mother-son dynamic when they’re getting along so I just generally want more of it. 

17. Adam. Adam has become my favorite character in this show and I just generally want more of him and his relationships with others. I love his relationship with his mother but I want more if him and Emily, and him and Ola and now him and Ruby. I want to see him and Ruby discussing the Kardashians. I want him to train Madam and enter her in more competitions and just ultimately grow his social circle. Get all the love and support for god’s sake this boy needs it. 

Im sure there are plenty of things I’m forgetting and you can ask me about them if you like but for now it’s late and I’m tired. 

[supercharmed-forever-mine]

On the rating of 10, how do you rate the writing of each legacies characters, why and who deserves better? What aspects should be improved?

I updated some of the opinion for clarity and also added Finch because I forgot her originally

I'll just make a list and go down it and I'm sorry in advance I love responding but I'm horrible at grammar/punctuation and also I might tend to ramble but I'll try to be as concise as possible. It should also be noted anything I state that might possibly relate to ships is a personal opinion and I have nothing against any ships/characters gay or straight/Good or Evil. However would it be said that I definitely mean more towards the gay/Badass with a Golden heart side of shipping with any fandom.

Hope Mikaelson- As of now I would rate her writing at about a 6. And I only say that because as we know a majority of her characters personality slightly has always but this season especially related to her relationship with Landon. And I wish we would see the Badass Tribrid Hope we've been promised since season 1 I mean sure there are no lack of examples of her bravery and martyrdom. But I am tired of her always feeling down on herself and like she's a cosmic mistake when it has literally been proven by Lizzie's wish in season 1 that their life would be infinitely shittier without her. What they can do to improve it is have her focus on friendship and herself instead of trying to always focus on Landon. She deserves more than just to be a boy obsessed character I mean she's the daughter of Klaus F****** Mikaelson for Pete sakes she literally descends from the most powerful supernatural family ever to exist and is rightfully the most powerful being on the f****** planet.

Note: I found Handon's relationship cutesy in season 1 but now not so much especially since they use him dying as a plot line way too often it just doesn't have the same effect that used to***

Josie Saltzman-As of now I would rate her writing at about an 8. I like how her character at least for a while had her own storyline going off the mystic falls High School plotline and how she lived with delena because it was a good call back for us TVD fans but I think it could have definitely lasted longer than a few episodes. We all know it was just used as a lot device to introduce Ethan as a series regular and as an introduction for her to Finch's character. But overall I feel throughout the seasons she has experienced at least some personal growth as exhibited even in 3x15 where she admitted she has to stop saying sorry especially to Lizzie for not always jumping to do what she needs / she wants all the time. Whereas before Android AU version aside because she literally had to do what she was programmed to do. She has an exhibited that she's starting to do what she needs to do for Josie before others most of the time or she's trying to. And as far as her relationship to Finch well I don't see them being endgame I have no problem with them and I do see Finch being one of her major loves of the series that teaches her whatever lesson she needs that leads her to whoever her endgame love is. With her relationships I will always miss Posie and I wish they could get Lulu back at least just for one episode. Also I feel these last two episodes of the girls being a trio they have a really Been serving Hosie with the looks but also I feel like in general Josie and Hope have been really in f****** tune. In conclusion I just don't know because Kaylee's acting skills and just turning general I would rate a billion she could choke me and I would literally thank her.

Lizzie Saltzman-as of now I would rate her at about a 7. I feel as if she has had great personal growth over the series and hell even this season. I also like hell despite everything in her life especially her eternal struggle with her mental illness she is always trying to do better and not just for herself but mainly for others and some people would say that's not good but I like it because it truly shows what she stated in 1x03 during the gargoyle incident that she never wants to be the bad or evil one. She has all this s*** thrown at her being called broken, being seen as the lesser than sister, and not to mention the absentee parents. Yet through all this she manages to only get stronger especially once she builds a genuine friendship with hope. However what I will say is that I don't like the regression of her friendship with Hope in correlation to her progress of especially her mental illness. And what I mean by that is it's almost been shown that once she had even the seeds of a true friendship with Hope that Hope would never give up on her hell not but like even an episode or two into their newly formed friendship in S1 Hope went to Josie when she Lizzie was on the verge of a bad episode and "sweet" Josie was basically like fuck her she needs to fall on her ass for once and Hope ass was appalled y'all she was like Lizzie can't control her brain chemistry and was so defensive/protective it's like once they got over that hurdle that mainly Josie gave them everything clicked into place and they were almost instant bff's. So for them to do so good in season 2 and then it seems like it showed especially in these last several episodes black magic incident to bring Landon back aside that Lizzie's old issues of resentment and jealousy towards hope are starting to come back and I don't like that because the more Lizzie had A Friend in Hope it seems like the better she got at coping and doing better mentally.(sorry if this has been a confusing several sentences). And no by that I do not mean that Lizzie is mental progress has solely relied on Hope but I do think it has helped significantly for her to have a true friend. Also let it be noted now out of every ship though I should Hosie too HIZZIE is my #1 ship on Legacies two phenomenally beautiful woman also the enemies to friends to lovers trope *chef's kiss*which might be plausible as I always wondered what they meant in the Hosie crush confession scene of season 1 when Josie said that she always went after everybody josie liked hinting that Lizzie might be at least bisexual or maybe that was just what Josie perceived at like 12/13 years old. Also on the note of relationships Mizzie was a cute concept at the beginning but I do love the fact that MG is finally finding himself and standing up for himself but he did also do it and I kind of a******-ish way towards Lizzie. And that's all I can say for her. Actually I could probably write a novel on this women and also Hizzie but I won't lol.

Alaric Saltzman- As of now I would give him a rating of like a 4 . In the last several episodes I think he's been trying to make progress at being a better person but that's about all I can say I'm not an anti. But he definitely will not be winning the father of the year award anytime soon and like many people have pointed out he was a great guardian to Elena and Jeremy so he has the potential in parenting he obviously just ain't using it or lost it over the decades. I don't hate him but I do believe they're doing a discredit towards the better man he was in The vampire Diaries especially at the beginning.

Landon Kirby-His writing is like a 3. He is just there to be arm candy for hope. Until the last couple episodes where he became this for once realistic not optimistic hardened badass he literally brought nothing to The season other than someone for Hope to obsess over. And to be someone that they repeatedly kill for shock value even though it literally shocks no one anymore. I don't hate his character but he doesn't tickle My Fancy as much anymore. His character has a lot of potentialy especially if they ever bring back in his Phoenix side and truly explore it beyond his almost endless ability to revive and being a "Bird Boy" lol. I mean truthfully they're doing him a disservice Aria is a phenomenal actor who could take his character places if they just let him be more than a basic ass plot device. Also can we talk about how gorgeous of a man Aria is especially in these last few episodes looking love it and fine as f***.

As it has become apparent to me I ramble too much and I just don't have the capacity as it is now almost 1:00 in the morning my time to do anymore characters in depth so I will be doing a simple excerpt for the rest now that I have done the main 5 people.

Kaleb Hawkins- His writing is a 8. I do like how he's coming to himself over the years and is a a right hand man to Alaric now instead of being just a uncontrollable vampire(the only hate on this part not towards Kaleb but Alaric is that it shows he will virtually mentor/uplift almost any teen that ain't his own daughters). Though in my opinion he always kind of had a point on some things especially about the hypocrisy of Alaric in season 1 especially on the bmood drinking thing. Him and Mg's relationship is awesome I'm glad they made up in the last episode and our brothers again. Also I was rooting for him and Cleo I think they would be a cute little couple. Also I need his backstory immediately especially after saying to Cleo the last time he was vulnerable he died I need to know how he turned.

Milton Greasley(MG)- His writing is a 9 the season. I say that because he is really came into his own and stopped being the punching bag. Though I think the idea or used to think at least that him and Lizzie would be cute together I am proud of him for standing up to Lizzie finally even though I liked him always being there for her I was tired of him being a fallback for her when it didn't work with whoever however I do think he could have went about the rejection a little bit gentler especially with how he knows of Lizzie's emotional problems. And don't even get me started on Alyssa that was just a disaster that should have never even been brought to fruition her cheating with Jed was probably the best thing that could have happened. I liked his little side adventure with Ethan though I do think they could have wrote it a little better I was sad when he had to compel the memories away like they still could have been friends he just couldn't have known about the supernatural stuff also I'm still not convinced Ethan won't become supernatural later in the series if he stays on. And that's all I have to say on that one love my baby.

Jed Tien-His writing I can't really give a writing I don't think it's horrible but I do think overall they could give him a better plot line as a series regular other than just being used for the comical relief eye candy/mentioning how he's the alpha. Though it was funny the whole pool tournament to decide who was alpha will Finch was just exactly that so bad it was laughable. However I do respect the fact that he even admitted to her that he knew she threw the game and that he is a genuine man of his word and has become better over the series from like this dumb jock stereotype to this genuine dude the Alyssa incident aside. He is a cinnamon roll and I will protect him at all cost.

Ethan- Again as he just became a series regular this season and barely showed up in his premiere season. I will not be rating him in any traditional sense. His writing is not totally horrible I liked his adventures with mg they could have been written better and they still could have let him be MG's friend without supernatural knowledge instead of compelling the friendship completely away. And I am still not convinced he will not become supernatural in some way depending on how long he stays in the series truthfully it's actually almost inevitable unless they go the whole route of making him the Matt/Token Human of the show which I really hope they don't I mean he can stay human but don't make him a supernatural hater.

Cleo-her writing is 10. I say that because she has been a phenomenal character and I've never seen the actress before but she is obviously phenomenal as well. I like her whole connection to Malivore and how it's a legitimate one that seems to be interwoven with the story that's already been presented and add something new. I also like how she tried and really wanted to genuinely be friends with all the characters especially hope but at the same time she was also very realistic and new probably and truthfully the only way for Malivore to be defeated was for Hope to Go full Tribrid and she wasn't above actually trying to murder hope to save herself and just get rid of Malivore which I can't blame her.

Malivore-after the end of season 3 / the first couple episodes of season 4 which were supposed to be the original ending to season 3 I better never hear the name again I am so tired of it this should have ended like at least a season ago at this point it's dragging on. This was supposed to be a monster of the week type of series which is okay me personally I have always appreciated having one big bad of the season and then a couple of minor baddies that get their characters arcs and take a few episodes to defeat or something as like a B or C plot. Point being is that this character and plot line has gotten stiff as can be. To be honest I think half of us aren't even here for plot line anymore we just want to see which of our ships get together.

Finch-I am loving her character and I do think she's cute with Josie. Also I stan anyone who is a sarcastic b**** Queen. I think it's nice how her will backstory was different than the traditional one but also I hated how sad it was like she literally didn't even know what she was doing. Though I will say calling Lizzie the "evil" twin that she can fight me because you don't talk about my blonde cinnamon roll like that is based on one impression from something that was only meant and done out of a good place and Lizzie's heart trying to find out her backstory. But other than that I have no real qualms with this character and it is too early to have a real in-depth analysis/opinion of her.

Thank you for reading this long rant hope I answered your question well enough if not PM me on anything specific.

[skammovistarplus]

Interview with Estíbaliz Burgaleta

[Note: Because I know it’s coming, this interview was released prior to the premiere of SEASON 2. That note about actors’ availabity has nothing to do with Fernando Lindez.]

Interview with Estíbaliz Burgaleta, head writer for SKAM España

By Ángela Armero

Estíbaliz Burgaleta is a script writer (SKAM España, Cable Girls, Morocco: Love in Times of War, Seis Hermanas, Velvet), writer (The Winner Takes It All, Loser), short film director (Bichos Raros, Mañana, La Leonera), webseries showrunner (Cataclismo), and script writing professor (Gona Estudios in Oviedo, Fiction Script Writing Master’s Degree at ECAM). As prolific as she is versatile, in her career she has alternated between melodrama and comedy, science fiction and teen shows, weekly shows and daily soaps, script pages and literature. If that weren’t enough, she blogs at Bichos Raros. She did Media Studies in Navarra and Script Writing at ECAM. She currenly heads the writer’s room for the Spanish remake of the Norwegian show SKAM, which is produced by Zeppelin and airs on Movistar. We’ve taken this opportunity to talk about this remake and, while we’re at it, try and find out how to do so many things and all of them well.

Estíbaliz, in your career you’ve done many things: television scripts, short films written and directed by you, the webseries Cataclismo, you’ve recently published two novels, you also teach… Is it a way to understand the job?

It’s more a way not to get bored, to try new trades, to pass the time when you’re in “between projects” (that is to say, unemployed), and also, to keep learning. For instance, when you shoot a short film you learn about the many things that can go wrong in the process of turning a script page into images. And writing novels it’s a way for me to do whatever I want, without having to be limited by network interference, or head writer interference, or scheduling problems with the actors, or anything like that. Actually, every project is a result of a specific moment in time because, right now, I wouldn’t direct short films for anything. Although who knows, never say never.

Season two of SKAM España just premiered, and you were also head writer for season one. What was your biggest challenge when you got started, and what was the biggest challenge when it came to season two?

Every time you start a TV show there’s a feeling of starting from zero. When it came to SKAM España, besides, we were a team who didn’t know each other beforehand. And, since it’s a remake, we had to decide to what point we were going to be faithful to the Norwegian show, which features we were going to keep and which ones we weren’t. We decided we couldn’t copy SKAM shot per shot, especially when other remakes were so faithful. We realized there was no sense in offering more of the same. The challenge in season one consisted in not disappointing SKAM fans, to be faithful to the tone of SKAM and to tackle the same topics: bullying, loss of your childhood friends, loneliness and the need to belong somewhere… but adding plot twists that fans of the original series wouldn’t see coming.

SKAM España season two goes down a different path than the original. What made you take this decision?

In addition to knowing from the start that it made no sense to offer a copy of the original show, we also noticed a desire, on the part of teenage audiences, to see a romantic love story, an iconic story, but where the characters were girls. In the Spanish audiovisual landscape, there are many stories that reflect the process of coming out by a boy, but we were missing something like that with a teenage girl, a referent for all these girls who are in the process of figuring themselves out and need to see themselves represented on screen.

What differences do you notice in a show like this, so dependent on real time, its audience and internet use, compared to other more classic offerings, such as Morocco: Love in Times of War, in which you also took part?

SKAM España is very different from other shows, from conception to format. It can be watched like a normal series, in episode format and weekly on Movistar, but it can also be watched on the website in real time and with additional information, such as the characters’ messages and the pictures they upload to their social media. That results in a different way to work, even the format of the scripts is different, because we include the Whatsapp chats and characters’ instagrams. That said, when it comes down to it, I think every show has its own rules, thus that feeling I mentioned earlier about starting from zero every time you come into a new project. When it comes to Morocco: Love in Times of War, we delved into the Rif War and we tried to research not just the era itself, but also medicine, military strategy…

What do you do to capture today’s teen slang? And, in general, to reflect teens properly.

This is one of the aspects in which SKAM España differs from other shows I’ve worked on. I had never in my life gone to rehearsals with the actors and in this show I’ve been able to and it’s super funny. This helps us in the process of reflecting the way they talk. Besides, the series directors [translator note: Begoña Álvarez and Tapi Ayerra] go through the effort of ensuring the cast makes the script theirs and inserts the slang that feels more natural to them during shooting. It ends up being contagious, and everyone in the crew has started saying things like “me renta mazo, tío.” I, personally, love the verb “stalkear” [translator note: from English, stalking] and I already use it daily. It means to look someone up on the internet to find out everything you can about that person, without them knowing, that is. I should also mention that before we wrote the series, there was field work done with psychologists, who interviewed teens aged 15 to 20, to find out what they worry about, their interests, the way they see life. Again, this was something I’d never done before for any other project, and it was really helpful.

Do you think they worry about the same things people of our generation worried about?

Resoundingly yes. They’re worried about their grades, what other people think of them, what they’ll do in the future, what they look like physically, fitting in. The feeling they repeated the most often in the interviews with the psychologists was “feeling overwhelmed.” They’re aware that they live in a crucial time in which they must make huge decisions, and most of them feel lost. What changes the most in this generation compared to ours is the tech. Cellphones, social media and the internet are part of their daily lives, and it’s manifest. But I think my generation, if we’d had today’s tech, would have behaved the same way with their obsession with self image, for instance, or with control and social media “stalking.” Then there are other details, such as fashion or music, that change, clearly for the worse. Because, let’s be real, was it really necessary for the fanny pack to make a comeback? Trap music is also something which escapes me and makes me feel like an old lady. Grunge was so much cooler.

What do you think about the golden age of TV, this boom? Do you think it’s a bubble or a progression that will continue going up?

I’m sorry to be a little fatalistic, but I have the feeling it’s a bubble. When it comes down to it, the number of viewers is what it is, and the budget to produce shows isn’t bottomless. But I hope I’m wrong and this lasts a long, long time. Just in case, I would recommend all the script writers to start saving.

You have also worked a lot as writer or head writer on daily soaps, such as SMS, Ciega a Citas or Seis Hermanas. What did you learn from these shows?

You learn so much on a daily soap, you develop a savage ability to work and savage reflexes. The dialogue team has to come out with five or six scripts per week, the rundown team has to come out with five or six rundowns. The crew works like an assembly line where you can never, ever take a break, or you fall behind airing date. I like that adrenaline rush. Besides, it’s precisely because the schedule is so tight that you get to see your work on screen quickly and with less changes that when you take part on a weekly show where the schedule extends over time, and there are so many edits to the script that in the end what you see on TV has very little to do with what you wrote.

Excluding SKAM España, what is the show you have learned or enjoyed the most from when writing it?

I have a very good time writing Cable Girls, because it’s a show where many genres fit: intrigue, romance, melodrama and even some humor. I enjoyed working on Ciega a Citas a lot because we did some really weird storylines, the vibe of the show allowed us to get even surrealistic and that’s always nice. With Seis Hermanas and Morocco: Love in Times of War, I delved into the early 20th century. And, since I love history, I loved being able to research.

And lastly, what do you think of female representation on TV?

I think we still have a long road ahead when it comes to female representation. I miss more women and, of course, older women and fat women, really ugly women or average ones. I’m a little fed up with all these women under 30 taking their clothes off for no reason. Even in “Love, Death & Robots,” which is an animated show, they have a healthy dose of topless girls. I think this is a result of both there still being more men in TV crews and the dominating gaze still being male. When it comes to “women’s” media, it’s more of a brand to help sell a product than a reality. I’ve found myself working in what were theoretically women’s shows (romantic melodrama, with female protagonists) where I was the only female writer. There won’t be any changes in the audiovisual landscape until there exists more parity in the crew. In addition to that, it’s still commonplace to check the credits of a series or a movie and find they’re a complete dickfest.  

[fortunatelylori]

"Everyone who's crossed her she's found a way to murder." I can definitely see this going through Jon's mind if Sansa is kidnapped. Sansa and Arya were used as baragining chips in S1 for Robb but he chose not to go to KL. Also, when Jon found out "they" were being held there he initially was going to go but was talked out of it and chose to honor his vows. I think this will come back too. Conflict of the heart. "You'd think of little else if you had too." (tbc...)

I think Jon will be consumed by this at this pt. So to make the stakes higher I think both the WW and Sansa getting kidnapped (if this does happen) will happen simultaneously. While I think Sansa and Cersei will have another showdown and Sansa being in KL against her will check so many boxes I can’t just can’t figure out why. Why kidnap and not just murder? Why would she think Jon would come when Robb didn’t? Could LF might have told her something about their relationship?

Also, if both Cersei and the WW happen at the same time then both of them will be right as far as who to be concerned about. How do you see this plot unfold? What will Jon’s conflict be at this point? What will he decide? What role will Dany play in this? I would love your thoughts on this. Thank you!

Hey, nonnie!

I have to say … this kidnapping plot is slowly taking over my life. :))))) I’ve been thinking about it a lot actually. And while the more time passes, the more I’m convinced it will happen, the details of it are still a little fuzzy for me. 

So I guess I could start by saying why a kidnapping of Sansa by Cersei makes sense and what story boxes it would tick if it were to happen. After all, you don’t make a plot choice if it doesn’t help you achieve certain goals both thematically and in terms of story progression: 

1. It would bring Sansa and Cersei face to face again: this is VERY important for a number of reasons. Sansa was Cersei’s “little dove”, the girl she attempted to mold to her will but also despised because she saw her as being weak and naive. Their relationship is rife for dramatic exploration and I don’t know any writer worth his salt that wouldn’t want to tap into that, particularly now that Sansa has grown and developed and they could flip the dynamic on its head, showing what Sansa has learned from all of her tormentors, Cersei included. This is also important because Sansa needs to go back to her: “If I am ever queen, I will make them love me” mentality. Right now she’s vacillating and the question of her admiring Cersei hangs in the air, as per Jon’s observation. The simplest way for Sansa to fully reject Cersei’s worldview is by being faced with her once again, and choosing to the the Queen that people love, not the Queen that people fear. It’s kind of a play on being faced with who you might become if you choose one road instead of another, sort of thing.  

2. The Younger, More Beautiful Queen: this prophecy has tormented Cersei her entire life and it’s bound to conclude in its final act. If Sansa is the younger, more beautiful queen that will cast Cersei down and take all that she holds dear, it makes sense that she would be present for Cersei’s demise, whatever that might be. I say present because while Sansa was involved for most of Cersei’s tragedies, she was never the party responsible, she inadvertently found herself involved and I hope the pattern continues because I like the idea of prophecies not being played straight and that Cersei herself is ultimately responsible for her own downfall. 

3. Sansa is the princess in the tower with no prince to save her: for all the complaining that people do that Sansa can’t do anything for herself and she always needs saving, the sad fact of the matter is Sansa has never truly been saved by anyone. As she herself puts it to LF: She’s taken from monsters that murdered her family and given to other monsters that murdered her family. Her “rescues” are simply an exacerbation of her confinement. No one saves her. The one that comes closest is Theon but it’s Sansa that pushes him to that point and thematically speaking this action is linked more to Theon regaining his identity that Sansa Stark being saved. Also, her reunion with Jon did not truly bring liberation because she was still stuck with LF and also her trauma has made her close herself off and put herself in a sort of emotional cage. 

As you mentioned, Robb actually refuses to risk the ire of his men to go and try to save Sansa so she’s never truly a priority for someone, nor is she the goal, as the princess in the tower trope lays out. So to finally see someone make Sansa their priority and come to rescue her, despite all other consideration, would be a fulfilling arc. Particularly since Sansa keeps saying that no one can protect her. People have taken this to mean that Sansa doesn’t want protection because she can take care of herself. I don’t think that’s it at all. Sophie Turner said that when Sansa reunites with Jon, it’s the first moment of happiness Sansa has felt in years because she’s finally with someone who will take care of her and look after her. So I think Sansa is still looking for that prince to protect her and save her. She just doesn’t believe that exists anymore. So maybe it’s time she be proven wrong. 

4. Jon has a choice to make: Jon has been teased with a choice between love and duty since season 1 and he’s always chosen duty. But there were always extenuating circumstances to his choice. When he wanted to join Robb’s campaign, Joer Mormont pointed out that fighting the WW was more important on the grand scheme of things. Also Jon, at the time, was still the outcast, bastard of Winterfell, looking to forge his new identity. When he chose the NW over Ygritte, he had already made up his mind that he was a brother of the NW and that’s where his life was (he tells Ygritte: I have to go home now) and also justified by the fact that Ygritte violent tendencies pushed him away in any case.  However, in the end the loyalty that Jon showed to the NW was betrayed when he was killed by the very people who called themselves his brothers. When he came back from the dead, he was a man without a purpose or a plan (a weird thing for Jon Snow). It was Sansa that gave that to him, pushed him back into action so it would be easy to assume that whatever determination Jon might have now to fight the WW, protect the North and whatever else is inextricably linked to her. So what happens if she’s in danger? Will Jon’s choice between love and duty be as easy to make as it was in the past? I’d argue no. Because Sansa is not only his love, but his duty as well. He’s sworn to protect her time and time again and her safety and well being are paramount to him. So this time we’re going to watch Jon choose love and what a sight that will be!  

5. Tension must be added to the Jon/D*ny dynamic: And the parentage reveal is not enough. Because D*ny finding out Jon is a rival for the throne she’s been dreaming about since season 1 is a political matter. Her seeing him lose his mind over the possibility of Cersei hurting Sansa is a deeply personal one. I always found it interesting that D*ny wasn’t there to witness Jon’s interaction with Theon on the beach and see his reaction when Theon brought up Sansa. But I’m willing to bet good money she’ll have a front row seat to Jon Snow going berserk because “his sister” is in danger. It will probably be the last nail in the coffin for the already doomed Jon/D*ny alliance. Also, at some point, Jon is going to ride Rhaegar, I’m almost 100% sure of that. No way the writers are passing up the opportunity to have their number 1 hero mount a dragon or have this Dance of Dragons 2.0 end without a Jon/D*ny showdown on dragon back. So what better time for Jon to steal Rhaegal than when he needs to get to KL really, really fast?

6. Jaime and Cersei need to meet again: For one I believe that Jaime is the younger brother who will choke Cersei to death. For two, Cersei’s storyline is so marked by wildfire that it would be weird not to have the man most traumatized by wildfire be there to stop her from using it (which I believe will be the reason why he ends up killing her, paralleling his killing of the Mad King). Jaime and Cersei’s relationship is so toxic and tragic that it needs to end in the same vein, and “I don’t believe you” and a quick exist North ain’t gonna cut it. We know Jaime is going North to join the fight against the WW so the kidnapping plot might bring him back to KL, of his own accord or perhaps as Jon’s hostage. (he’s going to need some kind of leverage against Cersei, right? Who better than the only person left in the world Cersei actually cares about?)

7. The feelings reveal needs to happen somehow: At some point Jon and Sansa will need to confess their love for each other. So … what better time in terms of full emotional impact than after they’ve been separated and they thought they’d die/never see each other again? 

8. The writers need to connect the Winterfell/WW plot to the King’s Landing plot: I mean what is Cersei going to do for at least 3 episodes? Walk around the Red Keep counting the villages she’s taken back from D*ny with the help of the Golden Company? I mean, that would be the smart thing to do. Why march your armies into the North, in the dead of winter, with a zombie apocalypse underfoot? But then again, if characters acted smart and rational all the time, we’d have much more boring plot lines, wouldn’t we? The kidnapping of Sansa can bring the two narrative threads together. 

So both in terms of plot expediency as well as arc completion, the kidnapping plot neatly solves all sorts of issues as well as add drama and the all important cliff hangers GOT loves. 

As for how it will unfold … I think what we’re truly missing in order to see the full picture is the: Why? Why does Cersei kidnap Sansa at this juncture in the story? She could have already done it in season 7, when Jon was away on Dragonstone. It would have been a hell of a lot easier to do than now, during the Long Night, with dragons circling Winterfell and huge armies fighting zombies. Unfortunately, I don’t have a clear answer to this. Something needs to happen … some unforeseen plot development that convinces Cersei to send her men to capture Sansa. What that might be, I’m not sure. 

But it will probably also be the answer to your question about why kidnap Sansa and not just murder her. In addition to that, one other reason why Cersei wouldn’t just murder Sansa is because of the way that Cersei gets her revenge. If we look at her revenge against Septa Ornella and Ellaria Sand, we can see that Cersei is not content to only murder her enemies, she wants to dish out the same amount and type of torment that was inflicted on her by the parties responsible. I imagine she will want to do the same thing to Sansa. 

Could this happen simultaneously with the WW attack? Again, I don’t know. Feels like a lot to juggle but it could … Maybe the kidnapping happens during the WW final battle and Jon going to KL is the start of the Dance of Dragons part of the story line? Maybe Jon steals Rhaegal to go rescue Sansa and D*ny pursues him on Drogon? Just ideas at this point …

One theory I do have is that Cersei need not attack Winterfell to get Sansa. After all, Cersei did promise to help against the WW. That would mean that the Winterfell gang, at least in theory, will be waiting for her tropes to arrive. Any day now … Almost there … There they are! They show up, Winterfell opens their gates and boom, somewhere during the night, Euron (it would need to be Euron, wouldn’t it? he’s the only one crazy enough to attempt it particularly if Cersei commits to marrying him) and his merry men abduct Sansa. Now imagine the fall out from that decision, the guilt that Jon would feel that he allowed them to walk through the gates, the angst, the torment! That would be great! So? In his desperation, he steals Rhaegal (and possibly Jaime) and goes to KL. The reason why I’m so attached to Jon stealing Rhaegal at this juncture is that atop a dragon, Jon has more of a chance of getting out there alive with Sansa, than if he were to travel by boat. I mean he needs to take precautions, despite whatever Cersei might say/promise. He’s not a moron. 

As for what happens in KL,it’s anyone’s guess at this point because again we must return to that pesky: why. Although I have to say, that whatever might happen, it won’t be that pretty for Sansa. I don’t see any way it could be. In the end, she will triumph but it will be an angst riddled couple of weeks for all of us.  

If anyone has scenarios to share here, please feel free. 

Thank you for the ask, nonnie!

[sk-salazar]

Here are my favorite things and some amazing observations about “Change Your Mind”. Needless to say, there are spoilers.

💖 Those cute rainbow caterpillar bois that Pink brought to Homeworld. And the image in my head of them chasing the Pearls. 😂 Someone needs to draw that.

💖 That DejaBlue pun.

💖 Connie standing up to Mama Blue and using her strict parents to her advantage.

💖 Steven standing up for his support of fusion instead of just giving Blue an empty apology.

💖 Blue realizing that she was wrong to use her emotional manipulation powers on her loved ones all these eons. And her comment about Homeworld failing Pink instead of Pink failing Homeworld. So many kids who defy the status quo need to hear this.

💖 Blue hiding the kids in her hair loop.

💖 The symbolism behind Steven throwing off his Pink Diamond getup and putting on his own clothes to confront White. (Maybe they’re just more comfortable, but I feel like there’s a clear message there.)

💖 Blue saying, “She prefers to be called Steven.” Even if she didn’t use a male pronoun, I can see a message here of accepting your trans kid and defending their chosen identify. Even if it causes a strain in your marriage.

💖 Connie’s courage (again!) to stand up to Yellow. Everyone kept blaming Connie for “blowing Steven’s chance to talk to White” because she fused with him. And Connie’s statement about changing the rules for everyone was the best clapback to that. Steven knows he’s right. Steven knows that servitude is wrong. He knows that denying who you want to be and not loving who you want to love is wrong. So if he is to confront White Diamond, he must do it on his terms, not hers.

💖 Yellow crying of her own volition.

💖 Connie’s “face-off” pun and all the hand puns about the ships. 😂 And Bismuth wanting to uppercut an upper crust. The writing for this episode was 🔥.

💖 Steven saying “GASP!” instead of actually gasping. 😂

💖 Lapis’ and Peridot’s new forms! I’m so in love with Lapis’ palazzo pants and golden sandals! She looks like she has so much more personality now. 💙💚

💖 Peridot saying, “Who needs thumbs?” even tho they’re the reason humans are an advanced species. 😂

💖 Steven’s observation about all his forms. Pink represented the “flight” response and Rose represented the “fight” response. Both of which are primitive responses to conflict. Meanwhile, Steven represents using logic and compassion to foster dialogue. He’s the most ascended form.

💖 Blue saying, “In order to fix [our family], we must admit that it’s broken.” Here, she voices the most common fear of those people who always push back against progress.

💖 Yellow telling Steven to #TakeAKnee . I see what you did there, Sugar Woman. 😏

💖 Yellow having the courage to tell White that “we need to talk about us”. (I love all the throwback references in this episode! One of which is this line, which is a throwback to the episode about Greg and Rose.)

💖 Steven telling White to “let us in your head” or to “get out of your head”. To be “in your head” means that you’re self-centered and unconcerned about the world around you. Again, that 🔥 writing.

💖 Amethyst’s owl pun. 😂

💖 Steven fusing with all the Crystal Gems to save them. Not only was it a great idea in an emergency, but it’s a great plot device. It gives us the answer to our questions about who all the Steven fusions are, thereby making it easier to wrap up the show sometime in the near future.

💖 The new fusions!!! Rainbow Quartz is a posh twink, Sunstone is a positive, 80’s rapper-esque cool dude role model for kids and Obsidian fucking Te Ka.

💖 Rainbow Quartz blowing a raspberry, Rainbow Quartz blasting off with a literal rainbow trail, Rainbow Quartz’s “two stones and one bird” joke. Just, Rainbow Quartz. 🌈

💖 The Crystal Gems forming a cheerleading pyramid to form Obsidian and Pearl doing a Swedish Alps move.

💖 That badass fucking shot of Obsidian’s multiple arms. As well as that epic music they played for her scene.

💖 The Crystal Gems’ new forms. Pearl has completely thrown off that flimsy veil thing that all Pearls have. (Which is a symbol of servitude to her.) And now, her outfit is a lot more conventionally human. (Maybe a sign that she wants to pursue Mystery Girl?) Also, the Star is on her back, representing her putting her past as a Crystal Gem behind her. Now, she’s just Pearl and she just wants to live her own chosen purpose.

Garnet has both red and blue in her corset. After Ruby and Sapphire spent time apart, Ruby realized that she liked being with Sapphire while still being herself. Maybe Sapphire came to the same conclusion. Maybe they both came to the conclusion that they’re not two halves of a whole. They’re two whole beings in one pair.

💖 Bismuth loving Connie enough to make her a custom non-Rose Quartz-themed sword. I love how much she loves and protects the new crew.

💖 The Great and Lovable Peridot declaring that she’s Homeworld’s savior.

💖 As unnerving as it is, I love the way White tries to mess with Steven’s head. She talks about Yellow’s, Blue’s and Pink’s impurities making them dependent on each other. (Essentially, colored diamonds are created because of impurities.) And also how Pink surrounds herself with outcasts in order to be considered normal or good. I don’t agree with any of her statements, but you’ll often hear bigots use the same kind of logic to justify their worldview, which really makes this show hit home in many ways. I have to admit, her words kind of messed with my head, too. For a moment, I had some intrusive thoughts, wondering if I believed what I believe so that I could be “the best of the worst”. I snapped out of it really quick, mind you. But this was an incredibly effective speech.

💖 Amethyst calling White a dirt wad. 😂 She has NO chill.

💖 Again, White Diamond being an absolute villain when she says, “Now I’ve removed all their flaws. Now they are perfect, now they are ME.” This could be an interpretation of God. He sees free will as a mistake because his creations choose NOT to glorify him and NOT to be molded in his image. So many awesome sneak-disses of real people in this episode. 😎👏🏼

💖 Yellow Pearl’s silly Pink Steven line turning out to be foreshadowing. 🤦🏻‍♀️

💖 The palpable representation of self-love in the form of Steven adoring his own form. Also, there’s a throwback to Rose Quartz saying, “Every time you love yourself or you love being yourself, that’s me loving you and loving being you.” Steven really is Pink’s ascended form. The song in the credits is from Pink to Steven.

💖 Rose Quartz and Pink being gone for good. So many stories have characters that come back to life and it seems like death loses meaning nowadays. As much as I love Rose, I’m here for her never coming back. Especially because that represents Pink/Rose/Steven growing and moving on. Just as we never go back to our old, naive selves, neither should Pink.

💖 Steven being equal to White in power, apparently. She was shook with that scream of his! And he took his sweet ass time walking towards his meat suit. That’s power right there.

💖 White saying, “I only want you to be yourself and if you can’t do that, I’ll do it for you.” A perfect representation of people nowadays forcing people to deny their true identities through draconian laws, unwritten social codes and bigoted statements.

(“You do not look like this, you do not sound like this, you are Pink Diamond” = “If you have a penis/vagina, you’re a man/woman.” “That gender doesn’t exist.” “Men and women are supposed to be with each other because...reproduction.” “You can live together, but don’t call it marriage.” Etc, etc.)

💖 The best line in the whole show: “I AM a child. What’s your excuse?” What a sweet, heartfelt way to remind us of the pilot episode, when all this magic got started. 😭

💖 White Diamond interpreted Pink’s “impurity” as warmth earlier. All this time, she thought that being “perfect” meant being detached, cold, unsympathetic, overbearing and cruel. But she becomes more likeable and multi-faceted when she absorbs Pink’s warmth/light. Without it, she’s a creepy, aloof puppet master. But with it, she becomes the same old White that the Diamonds loved. She changed quite easily, so that indicates to me that she felt the need to remove her emotions to become a more effective leader. (Kind of like how people with broken hearts often vow never to love again.) There should be a future exploration on this. Did she remove her own emotions? Did she do it in order to detach herself from grieving for Pink? Or did a higher, more eldritch power do this to her? 🤔 Either way, Pink’s warmth is the antidote to all forms of frigidity. For all that guff about her perfect white light penetrating everyone, she sure got shown a thing or two. 😁

💖 Apparently, Pink Pearl is okay-ish. She probably still has the trauma of being taken from Pink and having her eye cracked. But she apparently has no memory of being controlled. I was so tormented for the last month, wondering if poor Pink Pearl was screaming for freedom, trapped inside her own body. 😢

💖 Steven’s throwback to the song he sung to Lars and Sadie when they were stranded on the island. “If you let others just be whoever they are, maybe you could let yourself be whoever you are” is a throwback to “Let Yourself Just Be Wherever You Are”. It’s also a perfect message to people who rely on bigotry and forcefulness to serve as their whole identity.

💖 Sadie’s green hair. 💚 What a look! And Greg is such a good guy that he’s allowed Sadie and her band to play his song. ☺️ Also, her literal mic drop when the Diamond mothership lands above her. 🤣

💖 The way our perfect cinnamon roll always brings people together. The way he introduces the off-colors to the Diamonds like it’s NBD, like there hasn’t been eons of bad blood between them. And the way White is willing to say hello to them first. What a good grandma. ☺️ It’s funny that earlier on, White said that Pink inspires others to be their worst selves. Yet whenever Steven does stuff like this, it inspires me to be my best self. And many other fans too, I’m sure!

💖 Lars being kind to Lion. ☺️

💖 The off-colors and corrupted-now-uncorrupted Gems finally getting their happily ever after. ☺️

💖 Jasper still retaining a scar of her corruption. Because no one ever comes back unscathed and that little detail makes this story so much more real to us. Also, the way Amethyst explained everything to her, even after the way Jasper had bullied her.

💖 Yellow throwing up some deuces as the mothership was blasting off. 😂✌🏼 There is hope for these Diamonds after all.

💖 Steven’s closing song. What a perfect message to sum up the entire episode. 😍

[hoshigomi]

Elbe//Estrellas- Hoshigumi, 2019

Elbe/Estrellas is a show combo that I was lucky to see [redacted] number of times between the first day in Takarazuka, and the last day in Tokyo (including the Tokyo shinjin kouen performance!), and for a lot of reasons, most of them emotional, I wasn’t able to write up a review of it until after it closed. As much as it breaks my heart to say, the show is now behind us, so without further ado, here are my thoughts and opinions- aged like fine wine over the span of three months.

(Warning: it’s quite long, grab a drink and some popcorn.)

ELBE~

Honestly, and this goes for both Elbe AND Estrellas- there has never been a show that I was more nervous to see. The director talks and cast voices and eventually, rehearsal footage kind of scared me. It looked fun and fine, and like okay, but this show was my favorite actress’s last show, and the stakes were pretty high for me. I went in expecting nothing, and Dear Reader, I cried through the entire thing. I have never felt luckier.*

*I do want to address that opinion on this show is mixed, which, fair, that’s the beauty of theatre, and I wouldn’t want to change that! But I do think that an unfortunate amount of negative feeling is from people who went in expecting Benigumi to fail at something serious, a Takarazuka classic, and refused to be open to the experience, which, your loss. In any case, I’m so glad I went in with an open heart and hopefulness for this show, because my original assumption did a COMPLETE 180.

First of all, I loved Elbe. I have never seen any show this many times, or over such a wide span of time, and I was honestly taken aback every day by how the show progressed and evolved and changed. I was ESPECIALLY thrilled by Kurenai Yuzuru (Beni) as Karl and Kisaki Airi (Airi) as Margit, who by Tokyo, had REALLY hit their stride as these characters, and as a combi in this show. It’s so difficult to keep shows that run this long from getting stale, but from the line delivery to the acting choices, two shows were SELDOM the same. This came at a cost in some ways- if you’re trying out something different every day, you’re bound to have some hits and some misses- and they did have both- but the fact that this cast was able to be as PRESENT in this show as they were that they could live as In-The-Moment as they did was INSPIRING to me, as an actor. I was never bored while I was watching this show, even though there’s a really long stretch of serious scenes ¾ths of the way through. Serious kudos to all of Hoshigumi, especially Beni and Airi.

The plot was pretty simple to follow, though of course my Japanese isn’t NEARLY good enough to get everything about it (and it doesn’t help that Beni and Airi, who do the bulk of the talking, both fluctuated between vocal choices that HELPED my comprehension, and just straight up yelling- which, I’ll give to Beni, because it WAS in character…and Airi too, to an extent, but I could have done with it all being toned down a LITTLE.)

The show opens with a mini revue/parade on the grand staircase. As someone who LOVES revues and parades and big loud party group numbers, this absolutely kicked ass. It also gave some actresses in the troupe who don’t get to do a TON in Elbe the chance to actually be seen for a second, which was nice. Some people didn’t like it because it did nothing for the plot and was kind of out of place. That’s legit, so I’ll just say Your Mileage May Vary on this one- for me, it was one of my ABSOLUTE favorite parts of the show. 

The bare bones actual plot of Elbe is this (NOT SPOILER FREE, READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION, though the show is closed now so.): Karl (Beni) is a rough and tumble sailor. Margit (Airi) is a high class girl running away from an engagement she isn’t interested in to Florian (Rei Makoto/Coto), who’s just a really good guy who has loved her since they were young I guess and is also rich. Karl and Margit meet one night in a bar at the Beer Matsuri, and fall in love. Florian and Margit’s family are searching for her (rightfully so) because she like…just ran away. There’s a REALLY COOL search song/scene where everyone goes into the audience, the different groups bump into and interact with each other and the audience as they search for Karl and Margit. (Unfortunately, you can only catch this from the first floor) In the end, they find Margit with Karl at a restaurant, Florian asks Margit to come home, Margit says no, Margit’s dad DEMANDS Margit come home, Margit threatens that she’ll kill herself if they don’t let her be with Karl, a policeman threatens to shoot Karl, Florian steps in to end this madness (like the good guy he is, see), and they end up bringing Karl home with them. Obviously, Karl clashes with high society, and introducing him to Margit’s social circle doesn’t go well. Mess ensues, (side plots: Margit’s sister is in love with Florian, some other sailors are running around trying to find Karl, and one of them marries Karl’s sister. These sideplots aren’t super relevant, but are some of the best scenes in the show IMO.), Karl ends up taking a monetary bribe from Margit’s dad and abandoning her. After the beer matsuri ends and Karl takes off on his ship, Florian and Margit bust into the pub searching for Karl. Spoiler- it’s too late to get Karl back, but the desperate search is one of the most beautiful scenes in the show, so I’ll hash it out in a bit.

The sets/costumes, etc. Wow!! Yes! Okay! I loved them! In particular, the harbor set, which was a dark blue wash on the backdrop with the shadows and silhouettes and outlines of the buildings along the water, the golden lights shining from the windows, a lighthouse, pure, pure simplicity- it was just *chefs kiss* Literally my favorite backdrop I have ever seen. I studied it with opera glasses and it looked just as good close up! The Rich People House set was also stunningly detailed and grand. 

The pub was more of a big beer hall, than anything- a bit sparse- but that suited the impromptu beer matsuri dance party pretty well. From a purely practical standpoint, it had to be bare. They fit like all of the troupe in those scenes- they needed room to dance. I personally really appreciated the way they used elements from the beer matsuri to segue into other scenes, there were carousels and background actresses in the lederhosen and dirndl costumes moving around throughout so you couldn’t forget that the beer matsuri was still going on- the story takes place over a SHORT amount of time- and I really appreciated the life the usage of those actresses and set pieces, etc, brought to the stage. It was never disruptive to me and fit in with the rest of the action really well. Sometimes the usage was downright clever.  The costumes were REALLY pretty and well-suited to the show* , particularly all of Airi’s dresses and the sailor costumes- overalls and rolled up sleeves and half buttoned shirts galore! (yum. More of THOSE, please. The sailors and the bar girls who I guess were prostitutes had a number that I personally found pretty steamy which segued into a rough and tumble Men Of The Sea group number, which was flawless and also sexy.) Anyway, they offered a good contrast to the upper class costumes, which were also BEAUTIFUL. I appreciated the costuming and sets/lighting elements in this show a lot.  *Except Nanami Hiroki (Kai) as the sailor Tobias who WAS in a cowboy hat for no good reason for most of the show, but who’s complaining?

The main players- honkouen and shijinkouen casts! Kurenai Yuzuru as Karl. I was incredibly impressed by Beni in this role. She grew with it and lived in it, she was present in a way that I really rarely see on ANY stage and that I know is SO hard to pull off. I loved the way Beni played Karl rough and violent, because the moments where she truly let that all drop and was vulnerable and quiet and still were heartachingly poignant and beautiful. Her monologue after leaving Margit brought tears to my (and her) eyes. Her moments with Margit on the dock prior made me softly go “oh.” more times than I can count. Is Karl likeable? Not really. Is he an interesting character with a lot of dimensions that Beni played with to mostly great success? Absolutely. Kiwami Shin played Karl in the shinjinkouen (SK) cast. This isn’t her first lead, so I was a little surprised by how nervous she seemed- but I guess when you have a lead role in a tough show and only get one night to show what you’ve got, you end up pretty nervous regardless. She worked really hard on this, and had a lot of delightful and present moments. Musically she had her missteps, but her Karl was DEEPLY charming and genuine in a lot of ways. I’m interested to see where she goes from here. <3

Kisaki Airi as Margit. Airi Airi Airi! Margit is HARD but I really saw Airi in her headspace, working through her feelings for Karl, especially when Karl was monologuing to the ends of the earth and all she could do was react. She held her ground against Karl pretty well, I felt. She’s the classic caught-between-two-men ingenue role, and for what it’s worth, I thought Airi really worked with what she was given. She and Beni have hit their stride as a couple together, and that made Karl and Margit’s ( though few) playful moments really, really sweet. Also, boy, she’s beautiful. Mizuno Yuri played Margit in the SK and BOY did she work for it. Acting wise, she actually really had some great stuff going on, and some moments that were fresher and more clear when she did them than when Airi did! It’s cool to have a new perspective on a character like that. I hope she continues to work on herself vocally, because she is incredibly charming to watch onstage. Get it, Yuri.

Rei Makoto as Florian. A good guy. A really good guy. Not to cop out of this, but there’s not a lot to SAY about Coto or Florian. Florian is a good guy to a fault- he’s the one who searches most desperately and calls for Karl in the most heartbreaking way on the docks at the end of the show (seriously, she BROKE my heart every day), even though Karl is, by all accounts, his rival in love. Florian is just GOOD. I get why Margit’s sister is in love with him. And again, not to cop out, but…Coto is flawless. I don’t have anything to say about her. Her acting was beautiful and nuanced, it’s really come a long way and is about to join singing and dancing in the list of Things Coto Is Flawless At. Amahana Ema played Florian in the SK, and was also really good. I want to see her take more risks. She’s solidly unobjectionable- she isn’t doing anything at all wrong, she’s very GOOD, but I want to see her make some big choices! I know we’ll get to soon, though, the girl is currently traaaacked. She could become a force to be RECKONED with!

Nanami Hiroki as Tobias. Tobias is a role that was written specifically for Kai and put into the show for her. Because of this, his story (or…lack thereof?) didn’t really FIT into the plot in a significant way. He’s the only sailor with a good head on his shoulders, and plays straight man to the rest of the background goofball sailors (Seo Yuriya, Shidou Ryuu, Amahana Ema, Mao Yuuki, Amato Kanon). Because of this, Tobias and the sailor crew have the bulk of the comic relief transition scenes. Tobias falls in love with Karl’s sister and gets a sweet bridge solo about his new journey and a really lovely sendoff party in the pub- (which is more than obviously a thinly masked sendoff scene for Kai, the actress playing Tobias, who retired with this show.) Despite this, I loved the scene and the role. I’m biased, but the final scene was a nice button and wrap up to the beer matsuri plot and a good transition into the final scenes of the show. Tobias was perfect for Kai- the big brother part to everyone- handsome and deliberate and good. I loved Tobias, cowboy hat, heart print bandana, and all. Congratulations, and danke schön, Kai!! Amato Kanon as SK Tobias shook me to my core. I knew who she was before this, but only as someone who Kind Of Looks Like someone else I love. Holy shit, y’all, her first moment on the grand staircase (”Bravo, Bravo!”) made my heart burst. Of the three otokoyaku leads in the SK, 102nd Amato Kanon had the most control of herself, made the biggest choices, and ventured off the beaten path the most- to GREAT success. She’s mine forever. I love this kid. 

After these characters, stage time drops off significantly. Of note, Tenju Mitsuki played a good Inspector Kaufmann- though she deserves to play more than a one note, barely-there police role. She was INTIMIDATING though, even while flanked by the much taller and just bigger Toudou Jun and Haruto Yuuho as her underlings. Yuunagi Ryou (who was between all of us, the reason I saw the shinko) and her FASCINATING VOICE were really solidly on it. She’s certainly more suited to comedic stuff (her background sailor How-Much-Can-I-Get-Away-With antics in the HK were out of CONTROL and something I looked forward to every viewing. Double fisting pretzels and holding two pints of beer in one hand! Flirting with girls! Flirting with boys! Flexing! Stumbling half offstage!), but it was nice to see her flex her potential with a gun and a lot of harshly barked commands. Mizuno Yuri was CHARMING as Betty- another unfortunately one-note character, but watching her country bumpkin self charm stoic Tobias was sweet, even if they didn’t get to interact much. With all the love in my heart, I want to point out that she is also the noodliest actress I have ever seen. I wish there was like an equivalent of the specifically comedic brobante but for musumeyaku- she could grow into that NICELY.  Ruri Hanaka was SK Betty and honestly y’all she’s ready to be top musumeyaku- I only wish she got to sing and dance in this role. She has more game in her tiny body than most upperclassman otokoyaku do. The Rurihana support society meets Wednesdays- contact me for details. Arisa Hitomi played Suzanne- the younger sister in love with Florian (can’t blame her.) Her voice is beautiful and she works with this part as much as anyone possibly could. Kuracchi is SOLID in her skillset- I really hope we get to continue seeing it. Sakuraba Mai sounded very good as SK Suzanne but did fall into the trap of copying Kuracchi, not that I can hold that against ANY SK actress.   Amato Kanon as Johnny, the kid who just wants to ride in a boat, is literally one of the funniest things I have ever seen. Her physicality made me grin and brought tears to my eyes trying to hold back laughter. She’s at 110% every moment of the show, all balled-up fists and shouting and hunched shoulders. She’s channeling skittish TINY dog that’s all bark and no bite and I loved it. Seo Yuriya as the BRASH and rude Martin, Mao Yuuki as the DUMB AND FUNNY AND LOVEABLE AND BIG Oliver, Shidou Ryuu and Amahana Ema as the literally indistinguishable Rico and Enrico rounded out the group of sailors beautifully, and worked together to be pretty seamless comic relief. Senka’s Ema Naoki and Itsuki Chihiro both get to flex their acting chops as foils of sorts to Karl and Margit- as Veronica the barmaid sorta and Margit’s father, respectively,  and really brought and maintained some great emotional intensity to the stage. Mari Yuzumi was tragically underutilized as Margit’s mother, but worked the moments she had. Miki Chigusa had some great comedic beats as the owner of the hotel that Karl and Margit stayed at.  If you like Hiroka Yuu or Ooki Makoto, you’re in luck, they both get ten second vocal solos, and that’s more than I’d expect for them but less than they deserve. This show as a whole was a bit rough as far as good roles go- there weren’t a lot, so you might be left wanting if you’re rooting for someone in a not-main role. That said, one of the best parts about Elbe actually was hands down the life the minor role actresses were bringing to the ensemble scenes. I have never seen people have more fun or be more playful with food props. They were flirting, they were dancing, they were feasting and drinking and teasing and chasing and doing some truly bizarre miming (a microphone chicken leg for Honoka Kozakura? A steering wheel pretzel for Yuunagi Ryou?) there was one prop that only went around in SOME performances that was, and I am not exaggerating, a turkey leg as big as a large backpack that the actresses who were lucky enough to hold it dug into with abandon. The ensemble truly brought this story to life in a charming, beautiful way.

I loved Elbe. It was a beautiful choice for this troupe and a lovely send off for the graduating actresses, who got their last moments to shine onstage. The story was sweet (cliched, sure, but y’all, every story is, please.), and played so well by the cast. The music will be stuck in my head for years to come, and I’m always going to treasure the way I got to see it evolve over these three months.

ESTRELLAS~

Excuse my language- but Estrellas kicked ass. Usually I like revues with plots and throughlines (think The Entertainer or to an even greater and literal extent, Baddy), or with long spaces for comedic interlude and general mucking around (think Taiwan tour Killer Rouge)- and while Estrellas is NEITHER- it’s more of a jukebox revue than anything- it has solidly landed in my Top Favorite Revues Ever list. Initially, I was nervous. Again, this is a taidan revue, and is directed by Nakamura Satoru, who did Viva Festa- also a taidan revue, and not one that did Misaki Rion ANY sort of justice- (and personally, not a revue I love.) I went in expecting nothing and ended up with everything.

Estrellas opens with the title song, Estrellas- and it’s visually STUNNING. The costumes are blue and gold and starry, classy and cohesive in a way that I thank Jesus and also God for. Everyone looked incredible. We’re introduced to Beni, Airi, Coto, Kai, and Seocchi with little solos, and the rest of the ensemble shines brilliantly alongside them. We also get our first of two aisle sienne bits- including some actresses in the aisles on the second floor! (Elbe also had two scenes with actresses in the aisles, and I loved every bit of those.)

From there, we get Rei Makoto singing Sekai No Owari’s Starlight Parade while the set behind the curtain changes to set up for the taidansha medley. Coto is superhuman. She sings and dances and charms with a smooth ease that I can not begin to wrap my mind around. This song could be boring- it’s a solo on the bridge in front of a curtain, but Coto had the audience wrapped around her finger.  

Next up, the taidan medley- a mashup of Ken Hirai’s Pop Star, MISIA’S 僕はペガサス, and Flumpool’s 星に願いを, sung mostly by and featuring Nanami Hiroki, with other taidansha Katori Reira and Seki Yurito beautifully bringing the MISIA number to life. (Amakake Sakura is unfortunately too young to have been featured much :( ) it was a GOOD taidan number- featuring a lot of underclassmen in sweet swing dresses and suits, while Kai got to take center stage and sing some pretty pointed lyrics about making people happy and being a star, having to leave something but wishing you could stay, loving people who support you, etcetera, etcetera. 10/10 points for selection of songs, here. Kai milked every second she had for everything it was worth, turned the (effortless) charm all the way on, and did some of her languid half-dancing that you can’t even be mad at because she’s so busy throwing everyone smiles and love. It was beautiful to see. 

The upperclassmen (and like half the ken-7s) come in immediately with Tonight Is What It Means To Be Young (yes, this song.) Which features Beni smoking a cigarette, some lasers, costumes that are exclusively black fishnet, leather, or denim, out of control arena rock music, and some of the coolest high energy 80′s rock concert dance ensemble work ever (shoutout to Hiroka Yuu and Sazanami Reira who have KILLER dance solos at the start- I literally did not know they could dance like that and I really wish we could see the  upperclassmen shine like this more often.) Everyone looks hot and this number rocks.

Up next, Coto leading a 9 member boyband in Back- and this is the boyband number to end all boyband numbers. Apparently Coto doesn’t NEED to breathe while singing, even though this choregraphy is off the charts. Energetic and jumpy and intense and sharp and sexy and the woman does not lose a BEAT or a BREATH or miss a single step. To that note, NOBODY misses a step. It is, and I can not stress this enough, intense as hell. Could Coto’s reign be the beginning of top stars leading boyband numbers? I can only hope so. Next is the start of the chuuzume section- Hot Stuff featuring all the otokoyaku doing all your favorite (hot) things including, The Mouth Wipe Thing, the Fingers Through The Hair Thing, the Rubbing Your Thighs Thing, followed by Turn The Beat Around (the musumeyaku equivalent of Hot Stuff- led FLAWLESSLY by Airi), FOLLOWED BY Coto leading Sunny and strutting her stuff on the bridge while several otokoyaku/musumeyaku pairs do some Seductive Sexy Slinky duet dancing together. This goes into Beni and Airi dancing to Libertango - and this is a number that REALLY got me. It was VERY good. I don’t usually associate Beni and Airi with incredible pairwork, dancing wise, but they were both IN this. Beni’s injury she seemed to have been nursing before seems gone now, and Airi and her both are ACTING this number as they dance it (in the most gorgeous gold sequin outfits, may I add.) It was sexy and a little angry and they moved together like they have been paired forever. It’s really nice to see how far they’ve come with each other. Also, Airi can DANCE. The chuuzume could not be more Hoshigumi. It’s set to Orange Range’s チャンピオン, and it felt to me like such a celebration of what this troupe is. It made my face hurt from grinning It’s Beni rapid fire rapping and calling out and Hoshigumi responding and just PLAYING with each other, miming what Beni was calling out and teasing each other.  It was fast and funny and it just suited them all so well. The grins on everyones faces and the way this number celebrated the playfulness and friendship between these people was really really sweet to see. 

The rockette was good- not too long, and introduced by Beni with a smile and a wink. The revue starts wrapping up after the rockette. Next is a classically structured revue number I think- you know the kind of number where everyone is in matching flowy costumes, it’s all in sync and it’s dancy and it features the whole ensemble and the lyrics are about love or family? This was that（星サギの白）． More than any number, this one made me cry every time. Something about Beni and Airi finding each other and falling in love in the middle of the stage and the rest of their troupe, Kai centerstage right next to them, nudging them on with a grin reminiscent of her Kiroku in Another World  just gets me. It’s a peaceful world in this song until a group of (scorpions?) dressed in all black with a firey motif (led by Seocchi) comes on and tears everyone apart by the power of intense dance and lighting effects. The Good vs. Evil dance battle is ended by a thunderstorm brought on by Coto,  who comes up and does an (obviously stunning) solo dance and then brings everyone else back on to end the number with a 60-some strong cast filling the whole stage in sync. This song is overflowing with love. I can’t describe this number, but it’s so beyond powerful. Talk to me, I’d love to show it to you sometime.

Seocchi pops back up for a well-done original bridge solo after this, segueing into a SEXY musumeyaku dance led by Airi in a bob and a slinky silky skirt with a slit up to heaven, backed by Otoha Minori, Arisa Hitomi, Mizuno Yuri, Otosaki Itsuki, Yumeki Anru, Murasaki Rira, and Katori Reira.

It’s followed by the first REAL kuroenbi Hoshigumi has done in AGES, a sort of latin-tinged number featuring Beni, Kai, and Coto, and backed by all the otokoyaku you’ve grown to know and love (shoutout to Tenju Mitsuki for being more on it than we deserve, and Kisaragi Ren for never giving less than 4000%). This number is danced WELL, and it feels really unique to me as far as choreography goes. It was slick and it was sexy and it was intense and it was sharp- (but I’m not a Takarazuka expert. All I know is that I felt really satisfied by the whole thing.) It looks GOOD. Last up is the duet dance, (Yumeki Anru and Kozakura Honoka singing MISIA’s 逢いたくていま while Beni and Airi dance onstage). Beni and Airi just have something special. This duet dance was really nice to see- sweet and light and pure and so THEM- sometimes duet dances really fit the combi performing them and sometimes they don’t, and I’m so happy to see that this was the former. There’s no lift, there’s plenty of smiles and genuine fondness, there’s hand holding and running onto the bridge together, there’s beautiful fog and plenty of eye contact. The number ends with Beni offering Airi a hand and Airi pulling her into a hug in response, and more than once, Beni let out the softest gasp with her smile. I love Beni and Airi. I love seeing them together in their element. This duet dance is full of love, and it’s right up there with the Chigimiyu duet dance in Greatest Hits as my Favorite Duedan Ever.)

At this point, we’re at the parade. Taidansha Katori Reira is the etoile, and she reminds us with her voice what Hankyu has been sleeping on her whole time in the revue company. Things proceed as you’d expect. Kai gets her sanbante feathers (finally.) It’s all blue and white and gold and lovely. Hoshigumi is my favorite troupe in the world, and even without Kai, they’re going to remain just that (’we know, we know, you just wrote a 500 page review of one show,’ you may say, and to that, I’d say ‘yeah, and you read it, so.’)

Raku was wild. In addition to the emotions running rampant, Beni lost her voice almost entirely on the last note of Elbe and was running code red triage through all of Estrellas. The troupe more than pulled together though, supporting her and not missing a beat. (I feel bad for the taidansha though, and bad for Beni who clearly was feeling brokenhearted with the way things were going- but managed to joke about the situation, even as the combination of the situation and the fact that it’s taidan raku had her in tears.) Regardless of this though, I was inspired by how well everyone worked and the love and energy and professionalism they carried on with. The speeches were beautiful and the love was palpable and the taidansha speeches were touching. There wasn’t a dry eye in the theatre, and the sniffles could have drowned out the speeches. I felt so lucky I got to be there. <3

Overall, I give Elbe//Estrellas a 100/10 (surprise.)

I feel lucky just to have existed at the same time as this show, as this troupe, as my favorite actress. Getting to see it was a privilege, a source of so much love and happiness, and an inspiration to me. If anyone has any questions about any of it, or wants to talk about it, please don’t hesitate to reach out. If you’ve read this far (wow), thank you for reading and giving my thoughts a shot! If I could spread a fraction of the love this show has given me, I’d consider it a win in my book.

星組最高！

[singingvio]

IT’S DONE. THE FNAF POST.

ON PERSONALITIES.

Based on the main colors of the animatronics and what their animals usually are connected with, I will attempt to make the most accurate personalities I can for the animatronics possible if they were human. A lot of them won’t be covered, though, because they seem to be pretty minor with not a lot, if any, impact on the plot.

List of all animatronics that I will cover (M is male, F is female, O is other, such as genderfluid or nonbinary, and will be specified later):

GAME 1

Freddy Fazbear (M)

Bonnie (M)

Chica (F)

Foxy (M)

Golden Freddy (O)

GAME 2

Toy Freddy (M)

Toy Bonnie (M)

Toy Chica (F)

Mangle (Toy Foxy) (F)

IF YOU WANT ANOTHER ANIMATRONIC THAT I’M NOT COVERING DON’T ASK ME FOR IT BECAUSE NOPE I’M DONE.

FREDDY FAZBEAR

Bears are often thought of as protectors, courage, physical strength, and leadership. This makes sense, as Freddy is thought to be the “leader” of the animatronics in game 1. Human Freddy, I feel like should be physically strong, but not really look like it, so that it’s a surprise when you do any test of physical strength against him (referencing how jumpscares are supposed to be surprising). He should also have courage, especially when standing up for other people (the protector part) and be protective of his friends in general.

Of course, Freddy carries a microphone with him. I feel like he should have a good singing voice because microphone, not really another reason, I just feel like Freddy should be able to sing.

The color brown represents wholesomeness, stability, and peace, and because I’m an awful person when it comes to things like this, Freddy will never feel whole, like part of him is missing, and being around people makes him feel more complete, especially small children, but there will always be that hole where something doesn’t seem THERE. He'll never be at peace because of this, both mentally and physically, always wanting to move and do something (referencing the animatronics always moving around in the games), which is all part of his mental instability. He suffers from extreme anxiety and that ends up making him slight paranoid and a bit surprising. Thankfully, he’s REALLY good at hiding it and sort-of keeping it under control.

GOLDEN FREDDY

He’s really similar to Freddy in many ways.

“Bears are often thought of as protectors, courage, physical strength, and leadership. This makes sense, as Freddy is thought to be the “leader” of the animatronics in game 1. Human [Golden] Freddy, I feel like should be physically strong, but not really look like it, so that it’s a surprise when you do any test of physical strength against him (referencing how jumpscares are supposed to be surprising). He should also have courage, especially when standing up for other people (the protector part) and be protective of his friends in general.

Of course, [Golden] Freddy carries a microphone with him. I feel like he should have a good singing voice because microphone, not really another reason, I just feel like [Golden] Freddy should be able to sing.”

So, uh, yeah.

(O): Golden Freddy is genderfluid and his sex is male (identified as a male at birth). (Because Golden Freddy has a little girl’s laugh in the game, which is strange since it’s identified as a male by pretty much… everyone… and I wanted that to make sense in the modern ‘verse, and I feel like Golden Freddie is the type of person who wouldn’t feel comfortable with one gender. Switching around gives him a sense of freedom, and also it’s his gender(s) and he’s fine with it.) She goes by “Goldie” if female and he’s “Gold” if male, though he doesn’t particularly care if you call him one or the other, really, just uses each one for mostly one gender. He identifies mostly as male.

The color gold represents love, courage, magic, and wisdom. MAGIC? GOLDEN FREDDY SEEMS PRETTY MAGIC IN THE GAMES- ahem.

Golden Freddy has too much love to go around but doesn’t show it. He can be kind, but also… not. He, like regular Freddy, has bad mental stability, which translates to anger (instead of Freddy’s anxiety), making people think he doesn’t have the whole “love” thing going on. Again, he’s courageous. He has a love of magic, witchcraft, and like Freddy, is superstitious (again: DOESN’T HELP HIS MIND AT ALL). He’s also very smart and studies a lot, partly because he doesn’t really like people all that much and studying is a good excuse, but mostly because he just wants to keep his grades up as he gets older.

BONNIE

Rabbits are known to be cute, cuddly, and approachable. Well, again because I can be a terrible person, Bonnie is quite the opposite. He is adorable, but he has this whole “emo” thing going on that kind of takes that away, but if he ever gets out of the emo phase (which won’t happen anytime soon), the “cute” thing with definitely resurface. He’s not at all cuddly unless he knows you really well, then he is definitely cuddly. For now, this only happens around Foxy, Freddy, and Chica. He’s definitely not approachable because he has a good death glare that he will send your way if you try to talk to him when he wants to be alone (which is most of the time).

The color purple represents ambition, creativity, wisdom, peace, mystery, and independence. Bonnie is very smart, like Golden Freddy, with a love of mysteries, especially murder mysteries and (for some reason) horror stories. This messes with his mind, making him see ghosts and phantoms that make it seem like the antagonists from his book collection are around in real life. Thankfully, he has a therapist and Freddy helps with this as well. He’s very ambitious as well and sometimes stays up at night to get a project done (if the phantoms don’t show up, that is). He’s very creative, as well, translating this into a love of drawing and playing guitar. He can’t sing for s**t though. He’s sadly never at peace (PHANTOMS) unless with his friends, specifically Foxy (I ship them and you can’t stop me, though this can be platonic too). He likes being alone, but again, can be very cuddly and attached to his friends.

FOXY

A fox represents playfulness, agility, cleverness, wisdom, beauty, and curiosity. Foxy is very playful and kind of restless, always wanting to play something with his friends. This can range from harmless board games to prank wars that can go on for days. He can be very wise and helps his friends’ mental problems a lot and is also very clever and cunning, the trickster of the group, and is very smart despite not looking like it. He’s also what people would usually think of as “hot,” but doesn’t focus on that at all, more on his actual personality, not wanting beauty to become a part of who he is inside as well as outside.

He doesn’t have his right hand because of an accident (when the details change every time he tells the story), but he thinks it’s fine because he’s left-handed anyways.

The color red represents love, danger, anger, and adventure. Foxy has a tendency to mentally play matchmaker a lot, with himself and the people around him. No one is really annoyed by this unless he acts on it (which he usually doesn’t because it’s polite and he has SOME manners). He is usually carefree and easygoing-like, but if you mess with him or his friends you’re in big trouble. A pirate-lover, Foxy is always looking for a new adventure at every turn, and if he finds a mystery, he will drag his friends into solving it whether they like it or not (usually Bonnie because of Team Mystery Nerds). He also tends to have a bad temper but is good at keeping it under control most of the time.

CHICA

Chickens represent how good things are to come in your future, prosperity, and usually positive things. They also represent cowardice (which makes sense because of the “are you chicken?” phrase). Chica believes that everything has a silver lining, generally being pretty optimistic about the future. She tries to keep things balanced in her life and helps keep her friends positive about situations (failing a lot of the time with Bonnie but SHE WON’T QUIT). Sadly, she is a huge coward and is not good in a fight or at standing up for herself (or her friends) and is better at running away from problems than trying to solve them.

As shown by how she holds cake as the original animatronic, Chica loves food, especially sweets, and tends to eat a lot. Her favorite food is (you guessed it) cake.

The color yellow represents freshness, energy, loyalty, and deceit (and a lot more than that but the others I’ve covered already). Chica has done things in her life she regrets and would love a fresh start, always trying to start over if she commits wrongdoing. Sadly, this makes it harder to progress since she’s focused on trying to fix the past instead of trying to ensure that she has the good future she wants. She’s very loyal to her friends and wishes she can do anything to help them, but sadly, she is still a huge coward. She’s really good at lying, though doesn’t often, preferring to be honest.

TOY FREDDY

“Bears are often thought of as protectors, courage, physical strength, and leadership. This makes sense, as [Toy] Freddy is thought to be the “leader” of the animatronics in game 1. Human [Toy] Freddy, I feel like should be physically strong, but not really look like it, so that it’s a surprise when you do any test of physical strength against him (referencing how jumpscares are supposed to be surprising). He should also have courage, especially when standing up for other people (the protector part) and be protective of his friends in general.”

Toy Freddy seems more orange than brown to me. The color orange represents enthusiasm, happiness, creativity, and determination. Toy Freddy is very enthusiastic about what he enjoys, his hobbies and such, always pouring his emotions out when talking about his interests. He’s generally very happy and optimistic, like Chica, but doesn’t seem to care much about the future, instead more about the excitement of the present. He’s very creative and shows it through his writing, having written multiple stories about daydream adventures he goes on with his friends. He’s very determined to finish what he starts and rarely forgets to finish a project, though he will procrastinate sometimes if he doesn’t really want to do it in the first place.

TOY BONNIE

Toy Bonnie is like Bonnie pre-emo phase. Very cuddly, cute, and fun to be around, very approachable, and also (I forgot to mention this), very short. Both Bonnie and Toy Bonnie are very short. He’s also very energetic and always wants something to be going on around him that somewhat exciting.

The color blue represents trust, wisdom, confidence, and intelligence. Toy Bonnie doesn’t seem like it but is very smart and can be pretty wise. His friends go to him for help sometimes and he is happy to solve their problems. He is very trustworthy and keeps secrets very well, and also trusts people a lot (which is also a flaw but he doesn’t see it that way). He’s very confident and isn’t afraid of hiding anything, which translated to “that one kid who isn’t afraid of anything.”

MANGLE (TOY FOXY)

Mangle is like the female version of Foxy, very clever, playful, and curious. She has a talent for putting broken things back together again and loves to play games but unlike Foxy, not pranks. Instead, she likes playing child games that are 100% safe. She’s also willing to learn new things and is the type of person that, when looking for information, will “leave no stone unturned.”

The color white represents purity, safety, and perfection. Mangle is very pure and innocent, mostly because she’s protected from the dangers of the world by Foxy (Who’s her older brother figure). She’s also just protected by the others a lot in general (I envision her as a little girl when the other Toy versions and original ones are teenagers), being much younger and very sweet. Despite this sweet personality, though, she can snap from stress or anger very easily and get very dark. She has never physically or mentally harmed anyone but has come close in some cases. Adults see her as the perfect little girl, having never seen her snap like the other animatronics (people, I don’t know anymore), and this is what’s partly to blame for her snapping from stress, always striving to be the perfect little girl a lot.

TOY CHICA

Toy chica… Is mostly like Chica, with a few exceptions.

“Chickens represent how good things are to come in your future, prosperity, and usually positive things… [Toy] Chica believes that everything has a silver lining, generally being pretty optimistic about the future. She tries to keep things balanced in her life and helps keep her friends positive about situations (failing a lot of the time with Bonnie but SHE WON’T QUIT)...

As shown by how she holds cake as… [an] animatronic, [Toy] Chica loves food, especially sweets, and tends to eat a lot. Her favorite food is (you guessed it) cake.”

I’m going to use the color pink for toy Chica, though, I feel it fits her, and it IS a color on the animatronic.

The color pink represents the love of oneself and of others, and Toy Chica can be pretty self-centered sometimes but still cares about her friend. Because of how alike she is with Chica, feeling like she’s the same, Toy Chica loves to be outgoing and is definitely not a coward, but is scared easily. She’s an enthusiastic party girl, which makes her feel different from everyone (which is EXACTLY what she’s going for), and she often hosts parties and the others attend every time (Bonnie usually by Foxy convincing him because he is not a “people” person), usually not regretting it (Again, Bonnie is an exception. He usually regrets it but doesn’t say anything) and having a good time.

[margridarnauds]

6, 12, 23, and 45 please!

Thank you!

6. List your OTP from each fandom you’ve been involved in.

So, I have no idea what we’re talking about as far as levels of involvement, but here are the ones I read fanfic RELIGIOUSLY for back in the day. So, behold my shame. 

Cats (oh, my sweet, innocent 12 year old self) - Mistoffelees/Victoria. 

Phantom of the Opera - Raoul/Christine/Erik, tbh. I started off E/C, then shifted to R/C when I realized E was a trashfire, then went to R/C/E when I realized that I loved garbage after all. 

Van Helsing - Anna/Dracula. Which is impressive given I’ve never. Actually. Watched it. Sue me. 

Carmilla - Carmilla/Laura.

The Pirate Queen - Graínne/Donal, one of the first fics I ever wrote. (And then never published.) Yes, he is a garbage fire in the musical, but in my very specific rewrite of it, he wasn’t. Though these days, I kind of lean towards Tiernan/Donal or Tiernan/Gráinne/Donal. Garbage pirate OT3 is garbage. 

Dracula - The Countess (from Makt Myrkanna)/Lucy Westenra. The first explicit femslash I ever wrote, and it might very well never see the light of day because I do not forever want to be known as The One With The Blood And The Lesbians. Though, who knows? It might cleanse me of Printing Press. 

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic (Yes. Really.): Twilight/Princess Luna. I keep telling myself that my AO3 profile’s eventually going to be nothing but period dramas, my (1) Terra Nova fic, and…a My Little Pony fic, along with various Barbie Movie fics. For old time’s sake. 

Terra Nova - Wash/Mira, due to @janetcarter‘s influence. 

The Flash - Barrison. Specifically, Eobard/Barry. In many ways, it was my prep for 1789 with the whole “I murdered your parent” thing.  

The Avengers - Loki/Tony Stark.  

Les Miserables - Valjean/Javert 

The Golden Compass - Mrs. Coulter/Lord Asriel 

Arthuriana - Galahad/Mordred

Star Wars - Reylo or Finnlo. I don’t particularly have a preference, just let Kylo screw one of his various archnemeses straight to the side of the Light.

Star Wars: Rebels - Kallus/Zeb. Oh. Another enemies to lovers ship. Who would have guessed? 

1789 - Peyrol/Ronan (Was there any doubt? If there was, I need to write more.) 

Revolutionary Maximilien Robespierre - Madame Roland/Marie-Anne. In progress, but A Ship for me. Mainly because I’m a contrarian little shit who writes things when people tell me I can’t and then gets attached to the result.

Brennus, Enemy of Rome - Ahmet/Nissia. Which…I still need to. Write. My fanfic for that one. So that fanfic for it exists.  

Lord of the Rings - Boromir/Aragorn

Friedrich: Mythos und Tragödie - Countess Orzelska/Wilhelmine and Fritz/Katte. Pretty much equally, though Orzelskine (?) Wilhelska (?) is starting to edge out Fratte. 

La Legende du Roi Arthur - Leia/Guinevere in the French and Morgane/Guin in the Takarazuka. 

Irish Mythology - Bres/Sreng. I will defend this one to the death and I will do it with citations and footnotes. 

Scarecrow of Romney Marsh - General Pugh/Dr Syn. Yet another one I. Need to write the fic for. 

Star Trek: …….. 

………You know, my favorite thing about Star Trek is that, regardless of shipping preferences, we can all find something to enjoy. Kor/Kirk. While I can’t speak for DS9 Quark/Brunt, my current favorite from Discovery has to be Michael/Tilly, which might very well be the single most wholesome thing I’ve shipped in a very long time. 

Ace Attorney: Phoenix/Edgeworth. 

12. Who is your current OT3?

Chauvelin/Percy/Marguerite from The Scarlet Pimpernel. I do not accept constructive criticism on this one. Because Percy/Marguerite are sickeningly sweet on their own, Marguerite/Chauvelin has That Sexual Tension in Where’s the Girl and The Riddle, and Percy/Chauvelin fulfill all my requirements as far as enemies to lovers ships are concerned.

23. Name a fic you’ve written that you’re especially fond of & explain why you like it.

I’ve talked a lot about Forgiveness being one of the very few things I’ve written that I’ve ever liked and the ONE thing that I feel…gets my idea of how L/R WORK together and probably shows off my style best, along with Fowl Play (WHICH HAS FANART NOW. WHICH I’M STILL NOT OVER BECAUSE MY BABY HAS FANART.) So, instead, I’m going to shift to Pour la Peine, which…is my messy, messy child in many regards, not the least because it’s so much longer + still isn’t finished. 

(Warning for various and assorted personal, squishy feelings, as well as cancer mentions)

When I first got the prompt from @fallenidol-453, it was January of 2018. Two months before, I’d received the news that my uncle had Stage Four Esophageal Cancer and my mother had moved from our house to his house to care for him, leaving me without her help for the first time in my life, which I deliberately kept as low-key about on here as I could be, given that, to be honest, dealing with the endless “I’m so sorry to hear that”s gets very exhausting after awhile and I was a college student with a schedule to keep. And he and I had a very…contentious relationship, despite the two of us being alike in many ways. Possibly because we were alike in many ways. And, by May of that year, he was dead. And I would learn shortly afterwards that my paternal grandfather had died in January, but no one on my father’s side had bothered to tell me. I spent a lot of time trying to deal with the stress of that time, juggling that with my schoolwork and my fanfic, which I tried to work on from the time I received the prompt onwards. (Tbh, I’d had the opening scene in my mind for awhile before, but I hadn’t had a larger plot + ending until the prompt.)

At first, I thought that I would publish it like I’d later publish Forgiveness, in one straight chapter, but as time went on and on and there became less and less of a shot of having it done any time soon, I ended up just publishing the first chapter and deciding to update it from there. And that chapter got a lot of ribbing from friends. “Her brother is dead” really came off as a very melodramatic first line, but I also decided, very early on, that I didn’t care about what the objective quality of it was; all I cared about was creating a snapshot of a time in my life, just like when I go through the stuff that I made when I was twelve and I laugh about the various and assorted OCs and questionable phrases but love them all the same because they’re my twelve year old self’s. And, where I was at that point in my life, writing Solène mourning a family member who she had a difficult relationship with while I mourned a family member who I had a difficult relationship with, it was the only line that felt right to me.  

There’s a lot of things with this one that I’m still not sure about. There’s a plot twist that I’ve tried to be quiet about for all this time (that I’ve probably been really terrible about keeping, tbh) and that is either going to be the Jumping the Shark moment or the defining moment of it, and I’m obviously not sure how that’s going to be received though I want to believe I’ve foreshadowed it enough to not make it too much of a swerve, I’m not sure how I feel about the ending, there’s a lot there that’s murky and probably more reflective of my writing a year ago than not, and I’m not sure about how I’ve handled the character dynamics given what we’ve got in canon or the dynamic I’ve put them into, or whether the choices they’ll make reflect THEM or what I WANTED them to do. Hell, with a few things, I’m not sure how I’m even going to GET to the ending. 

But, I’m really proud of how much I’ve had the chance to work with Solène and Olympe, I’m really happy with a lot of the work I put into sequences like the two chapters long March to Versailles, which involved looking into a LOT of personal accounts as well as secondary sources analyzing it, and I liked trying to flesh out Solène’s world. But, more importantly, of everything I’ve written, it and Le Cri are probably the most directly personal to me, and even though a part of me still says Her brother is dead is a hell of a melodramatic opening line, it fulfilled its purpose. And, tbh, sometimes that’s all a fic needs. 

45. What is your all time favourite fanfic? 

This is so hard for me, because there are so many fics that have left a huge impression on me throughout the various fandoms I’ve been in. In 1789 alone, I was thinking of at least two different fics at a given point, which is both fantastic and minorly stressful given how small this fandom is (one of which, incidentally, was Little Dove Heart, since that really gave me a huge push as far as Laz and his backstory and his characterization and his relationship to Artois, even if I tend to keep the latter more in the background). And there have been so many fics I’ve read that I’ll remember and go back to periodically, and that really helped me as far as looking at how character voices could be developed and how description would work and how to work a time period and a setting into a story. 

Overall though, I think I’m going to have to give it to Vae Victis, which is a work by @sineala‘s. I’ve never been quiet about my undying love for the Gauls and for Brennus in particular. Brennus is one of my historical favs, and I felt like this fic did a really, really fantastic job of bringing that much-neglected period of time to life and developing the characters on their own, without me having any background in the source material. With fanfic, especially with a more active fandom, there’s kind of an expectation that everyone knows the characters involved, so to be able to work in a different time and to get the reader fully invested in the characters and their relationship in their own right is a really fantastic accomplishment, and to be able to show the Gauls and Brennus (in what little time he gets, because my boi’s not the focus and I accept that) as three dimensional figures rather than a rampaging horde is always much appreciated. And it has a WORKS CITED page at the end, AKA the eternal key to my heart. 

[themyskira]

Wonder Woman: Earth One, Vol 2 - Part 1

I’m going to break this into a few parts, because it turned out I had a bit to say. I’ll start with my overall impressions, then dive into the spoilery recap.

General thoughts: Next verse, same as the first.

Grant Morrison purports to want to explore Marston’s ideas, but he’s more interested in the kooky, kinky trappings than the sentiment behind them.

Marston was radical and progressive in his time. Writing in the 1940s, he told his readers that women were men’s equals — and even superiors! — in every way. He told young girls there was no limit to what they could do. His stories promoted love over hatred, peace over violence, rehabilitation over retribution.

If Morrison had taken that bold sentiment and reimagined it through a lens of modern society and feminism in 2018, he might have had a compelling story to tell. Instead, he takes Marston’s ideas as he understands them and transplants them wholesale into a time in which they’re no longer radical and progressive, but rather backward and out-of-step with modern intersectional feminism, and then proceeds to ask such deep, incisive questions as “yes but realistically could we actually replace all world governments with a matriarchy?????”

He never truly deconstructs any of Marston’s ideas, just parrots phrases like “submission to loving authority” a lot and raises questions without ever making a decent attempt at answering them. To be fair, part of the problem is that he’s simply trying to do too much at once: juggling parallel stories in Themyscira and Man’s World, an interrogation of the Amazons’ philosophies and the introduction of three new antagonists and the tensions they cause, all within a limited page count, Morrison is unable to devote the necessary time to properly developing any of them. It’s no wonder the result is so half-baked.

But hey, just throw in a bunch of vagina planes and a dusting of kink and watch as everyone crows over how subversive he is.

Yannick Paquette’s artwork is still beautiful. His page layouts are still dynamic and expressive, and his character designs are still lovely. Diana in particular gets a variety of very cool outfits, including a beautiful modest costume for a trip to the Middle East.

But he still can’t shake his tendency towards drawing women’s bodies in weirdly-contorted poses with bizarre pornfaces. Wonder Woman shouldn’t look like she’s orgasming as she’s leaping into battle, ffs.

Oh, and the series is still being edited by noted serial sexual harasser Eddie Berganza. HASHTAG FEMINISM!

Let’s get into the recap.

Content warning for some skeevy mind control content and general discussion of the gender essentialist, body-shaming, TERFy attitudes of Morrison’s Amazons.

The story opens with a flashback to 1942, with Paula von Gunther leading a Nazi invasion of Themyscira, and god I’m already so tired.

idk, I mean, I get that Nazis were a major Golden Age antagonist, and Morrison is harking back to that. But there’s a broader historical and cultural context to consider. Cartoonish Nazi villains in patriotic WWII-era American comics carried very different associations than they do in 2018, in the midst of a presidency steeped in white supremacy and hate speech, on the eve of a midterm election in which a record number of neo-Nazis are standing for office, at a time when hate groups are surging, when migrant children are being separated from their families and held in detention camps— just. Not a time when I want to be reading about cartoonish super-Nazis, personally.

And I don’t really see why they necessarily need to be this story? The battle serves to illustrate how Amazons combat and… “rehabilitate”… their adversaries. Paula ultimately serves as a plot device. Couldn’t that maybe have been achieved without Nazis?

Anyway, Paula announces that she is claiming the island for the Third Reich, and Hippolyta is like “lol no”.

Okay, that part I like. Evil army storms the island, backed by guns and warships, surround a half-dozen barely-armed women… who all but roll their eyes. ‘Pfft, children. Fine, if you want to play this game…’ And the evil army can only gape in bewilderment as the women proceed to take them apart in minutes.

But this is where it gets weird.

The Amazons fire a purple ray at all of the Nazis, which… makes them all drop their weapons and start screaming “YES!” orgasmically?

Hippolyta tells Paula that the soldiers “will be taken to the Space Transformer. They will be transported to Aphrodite’s world where Queen Desira and her butterfly-winged Venus Girls wait to purge them of their need for conflict. They will be taught to submit to loving authority. They will learn to embrace peace and obedience. They will be as happy as men can be.”

Paula attacks Hippolyta, rips off her magic girdle and heaves a great boulder over her head— wait, were we supposed to know that Paula had superpowers? That seems like something that should have been flagged.

She effortlessly takes down the Amazons who rush to the queen’s defence and takes a moment to cackle villainously. “Behold the pride of Germany! The ultimate daughter of the thousand-year-empire of Adolf Hitler!” To which Hippolyta— okay, I like this part, too.

Hippolyta calmly gets to her feet and puts Paula in a stranglehold. “We are the Amazons of myth, my dear! I am Queen Hippolyta eternal.” She swiftly and efficiently brings Paula to her knees.

But, welp, never mind, it’s about to get fucking creepy again.

Hippolyta forces Paula into “the Venus Girdle”, a device that “charges every body cell with vitalising currents and harmonises the brain, encouraging obedience.”

Paula: Let me go! What is that? What are you doing? Hippolyta: The Venus Girdle? It charges every body cell with vitalising currents and harmonises the brain, encouraging obedience. A dainty thing, is it not? Paula: I won’t— I won’t— You can’t control me— you can’t— can’t make me— make me... oh… make me…

Paula: nmmuhhh… What’s happening? My Nazi ideals— slipping away— they— they don’t make any sense now… I— I thought— I thought— I was strong. What’s wrong with me? I’m so weak— I must be weak to wish to serve weak, cruel men— like— like Herr Hitler— I— I— Hippolyta: If you truly long to be a slave to the ideas of others, well… we can find a loving mistress to help you explore your desires in a healthier context. Paula: Yes. Yes! My queen— [sob] —how can you ever forgive me? How wise of you to know— to know this is all I ever wanted! Hippolyta: Devote yourself to me by following the Amazon Code. Go with out sweet Mala to Improvement Island. There you will come to know yourself until the Venus Girdle is no longer required.

Paula: But all I want is to serve you, my queen! I love you! Please don’t turn your back on me!

Basically, Hippolyta forcibly uses a mind-altering device on Paula that alters her brain chemistry to make her placid, compliant and suggestible, then immediately washes her hands of her.

So… let’s talk about this, because I think it strikes at the heart of the problems with Wonder Woman: Earth One.

Queen Desira, the Venus Girls, magnetic golden Venus Girdles that “harmonise the brain” — all these things are drawn from Golden Age Wondy comics cowritten by Marston and his collaborator Joye Kelly. Marston played with mind control a lot in his stories, and not all of it came from the bad guys.

Morrison’s bold, subversive approach to these story elements is to export them wholesale into the present day and force us to feel uncomfortable about them.

In other words, he’s taking some of the weirder and more fucked up story elements from a collection of comics that are widely agreed to be very weird, and then plonking it before your readers and asking, ‘hey guys, have you ever considered… that this might be weird and fucked up???’

There’s nothing clever or insightful about that. And there’s certainly nothing groundbreaking about a cis white male writer imagining a fictitious feminist dystopia where women strip away men’s free will.

Like, if you really want to be subversive with Marston’s Wonder Woman, how about you start by hiring a woman to write it? Why not see what this iconic feminist hero conceived by a cis white man in the 1940s and written almost exclusively by cis white men for over 75 years might look like if she were reimagined and reinterpreted by LGBTI women, by women of colour? By the women left out of those original comics?

That would be subversive. Morrison is just being a smartarse.

So yeah, Hippolyta turns her back on the helpless, brainwashed, lovesick Paula and walks over to Diana, who’s defied her mother’s orders and run down from the palace to get a glimpse of the action. She’s full of questions; Hippolyta brushes them off with the usual (for Morrison’s Amazons) ‘men are shit’ line.

There’s a moment where Paula and Diana meet eyes from across the beach, and each asks, “who is she?” Diana is simply curious; Paula is instantly lovestruck.

Paula: That girl… the image of my queen.

This looks like foreshadowing, but spoilers: it goes absolutely nowhere.

Sidenote: If the Amazons deal with invaders by brainwashing them, why did they want to kill Steve Trevor in Volume One?

Cut to present-day America, where a room of faceless men discuss the threat posed by the Amazons and their superior technology, which they assume extends to deadly weaponry. The only in they have with the Amazons is Wonder Woman, and to get through her defences they’ve called in “an expert in female psychology”, aka a misogynistic monster.

Doctor Psycho: Gentlemen. She may be strong and tough and smart and beautiful… but she’s just a woman. I never met one I couldn’t break.

Oh, goody.

Cut to a cute splash page of Diana playing baseball. She gets a lot of great outfits in this book.

She’s also clearly making an impact in Man’s World; her face is plastered across every magazine, and people flock to hear her speak.

A Q&A sessions serves as a thinly-veiled opportunity for Morrison to answer some of the criticisms of the first book. His response leaves something to be desired.

“Amazon training can make any of you into a Wonder Woman,” says Diana. We teach a system of physical and psychological health and vitality. The grace and beauty of Aphrodite, the skill and wisdom of Athena.”

Woman: What about Wonder trans women? Is there room for people like me in your utopia? Diana: There’s room for everyone. The Amazon Code was evolved by women over thousands of years and outlines a progressive, pacifist way of living and thinking that anyone can follow.

I’m sorry, but that’s a fucking bullshit answer. It’s a weak, superficial gesture towards inclusiveness that conspicuously fails to express any real support or solidarity.

And depressingly, this is 100% in-character for Earth One Diana, because Morrison’s Amazons? are absolutely TERFs. As with the mind control content, Morrison has exported Marston’s 1940s binaristic gender essentialism unchanged into the 21st century in order to ask searing questions like ‘hey but what if??? the idea that women are genetically more suited to ruling??? is simplistic and flawed?????’ But the most he’ll engage with the genuinely insidious implications around the exclusion of trans and nonbinary people is a smiling noncommittal, ‘Are trans people welcome? My friend, everyone is welcome! No further questions!’

Morrison’s Wonder Woman displays a profound disregard of context. He ignores not only the cultural, historical and individual contexts that shaped the original 1940s Wonder Woman, but also the contexts of the time in which he’s currently writing and the cultural space that Wondy has come to inhabit today as a feminist and LGBT icon.

Removed from context, Morrison is simply taking a hero who traditionally hails from an advanced utopian society, taking another look at the views that society actually espouses, and reframing her as a well-meaning but naive hero from an advanced but deeply flawed and unsettling society.

In context, he’s doing exactly what Brian Azzarello did in turning the Amazons into murderous man-hating monsters, just with more kink and vagina planes.

Woman 2: Umm, there’s a lot of stuff on social media about how you dress provocatively and promote an unrealistic body type, which is basically setting a bad example for women. I mean, the stuff you do is amazing and all, it’s just… does any of the criticism bother you? Diana: I don’t think there’s any such thing as an ‘unrealistic’ body shape. My own body is the result of diet, exercise and… um… sophisticated genetic engineering. Otherwise, I dress as I please.

Volume One made it clear that all Amazons have the physique of supermodels, and when they encounter the diverse body types of the women in our world, they are disgusted and respond with body-shaming insults. Here, Diana again avoids voicing any actual support (she doesn’t say that all women’s bodies are beautiful and valid, she suggests that her body type is not unrealistic), while also throwing out eugenics as a reason for the lack of body diversity among the Amazons. Oh good, I was hoping we’d get more Nazi parallels!

Finally, a militant white feminist stands up and observes that if the Amazons are capable of half of what Diana says they are, then they could dismantle the patriarchy overnight — so why is Diana wasting time giving philosophy lectures? “You can control people’s minds with that lasso of yours. Like you did with that dude on TV— so why can’t you put a lasso ‘round the whole world?”

Afterwards, talking to Beth Candy, Diana’s like, ‘gosh, Beth, I’ve never seriously thought about world domination before, but maybe it is time to consider stripping all mortals of their free will, dismantling all nations and compelling everybody on the planet to bow down before Amazonia.’

Then Diana gets on her mental radio and calls her mother, confessing her doubts about her mission.

It was around this point in the book that the Amazons’ dialogue began to grate on me. I couldn’t put my finger on what it was at first. Every line read like a ceremonious pronouncement. They used antiquated syntax and words, like “whole systems … must o’erturned be” and “she did, without due caution, this, her island home, depart!”. Even Diana would become infected with it whenever she was speaking to them. It felt like they weren’t so much conversing as they were reciting… 

...verse… 

oh my god, that motherfucker.

Surely he hadn’t.

I scanned the dialogue again. I double-checked it.

He had.

Grant Morrison, that obscenely pretentious wanker, wrote all of the Amazons’ dialogue in dactylic hexameter.

For fuck’s sake.

After finishing her call with Diana, Hippolyta learns that somebody has vandalised one of the temples with the symbol of “a backward-turning sun”, i.e. a swastika. Unseen by everybody, Paula breaks into Hippolyta’s palace.

[genocidershodan]

Tagged by my good writing/space buddy @johnandrasjaqobis

List all the things you’re currently working on in as much or little detail as you’d like, then tag some friends to see what they’re working on: writing, art, gifsets, whatever.

Well. First off, I’ve stopped doing fanfics. At least for the time being. The last fanfic I wrote was a sweeping MLP epic story that I kinda stopped writing a few chapters in, even though I had grand plans. But my waning interest in both MLP and writing about other people’s characters, as well as the show having progressed to a point that my story was no longer canon (I started writing it in like the middle of season 3. i think.

Anyway, I just told you what I’m not working on, let’s talk about what I am…

Black Horizon This is my current project, and everything else is on the back burner. Black Horizon is the first book in what is projected to be a series of about 6 high fantasy novels.

The story for the first book follows Drade and Darius. Too child hood friends who were children growing up together in the northern frontier town of Durst Ridge. The setting in the story has an incredibly long and complicated history. But most recently, nearly 2 hundred years ago an apocalyptic war had almost wiped humanity clean from the world. However, now Toraan (the only country to survive the war), is entering a golden age of industry and technological advancement. People are saying that we’ve finally recovered from the war. The nation is undergoing a huge social change as a lot of the government institutions implemented for regrowth are becoming irrelevant.

In this world Drade and Darius come in, growing up they fantasized about being soldiers together, but their fates change when Elzor the Wind Walker, court spellbinder to the king, arrived in Durst Ridge to inform Drade that many years ago, he journeyed across Toraan, testing new born babies for a particular affinity for spellbinding. Drade had been one of those babies, and now the choice was laid to his feet to go back south with Elzor and become an apprentice spellbinder.

It’s a no brainer really, I don’t think anyone would say no. But the story follows Drade and Darius as they grow older, and learn, until eventually their fates intertwine again when a shadow of Toraan’s past threatens to swallow it whole.

Unnamed Science Fiction project. This is a fairly recent idea that, admittedly started off as a Star Trek spin off. As such, it is very inspired by Star Trek, including the concepts of unity and embracing multiculturalism, but most of all the optimism for a better life for all humans.

The story, set in the 23rd century. Is set after the construction of several ships equipped with brand new class 5 Alcubierre drives at Dire Dawa shipyards in Ethiopia. (Well, technically the parts were constructed there, then brought out to space and assembled). Journeys that could take over a month before can now take just under a week. And these brand new top of the line ships are built for long term space expeditions, that could sustain the crew for years without having to return for supplies. The media and the public are going crazy. Finally we’re out there, exploring the galaxy in all of it’s glory.

Nabihah Abu El Sayid, an experienced and cool headed captain in the USSEA. Has demonstrated in her career the ability to take command and control an emergency situation, being able to deal with complex moral issues, and has a strong background as a scientist. As such, she was selected by the board of the USSEA to take command of the USSS Āsisi, one of these brand new ships.

The story follows her and the crew of the Āsisi, as they explore space, come across anomalies, and perhaps maybe spearhead humanity’s first contact with an intelligent alien species.

I’ve been working on mostly the world building and the back story. So far I only have two characters. Captain Nabihah Abu El Sayid, a Muslim woman born in Gaza, Palestine with a background in science but some solid leadership experience. And Captain Alejandra Monero, born in Cali, Colombia. XO of the Marine detachment assigned to the  Āsisi for defence. While on the ship though, as per marine tradition, she’s referred to as “commander” instead of “captain”. She’s a devout marine and the corps is her life.

Overclocked “I think. When you kill someone. A part of you dies as well. And if you kill enough people, at some point there’s be nothing left of the living person you used to be.” 

This is actually a bit of an old idea, If you’ve watched Purepwnage, Overlocked could actually be set in the same universe. This was also planned originally as a TV series. Korn would feature heavily and thematically. With each season being represented by themes in a different Korn album. It’s a bit of a weird idea. and ok maybe I was going through a korn phase at the time I was coming up with this. The story was pretty dark. It dealt with trauma, PTSD, death, the effects of killing other human beings can have on your psyche, etcetera.

Basically, the story is about a group of characters. Veterans of the 8-bit war. When Sega fell at the end of the war. The remaining people either defected to Nintendo or were hunted down by the inquisition. A group of nintendo fanatics who made it their mission to eradicate every last remaining sega loyalist. Of which our main character, Kaiden is one.

He’s in hiding and as far as he knows, all of his squad either defected or are dead. He never really wanted to go to war. He was young and naive and followed his older brother on adventure, having been fond of the sega. His brother was the smart one. Got out before the war started making his head too funny. But Kaiden couldn’t leave. Not after what he’d seen, and to abandon his new family? Never. He resented his older brother, for bringing him along and for leaving. When the war ended, however hadn’t died or defected went into hiding. Refusing to denounce their loyalty to sega.

Growing up in war. There’s only one skill that he has left now. Killing. He works as a hit man for local mobsters. He gets paid exceptionally well for what he does for two reasons. One, he’ll do the jobs that other people won’t take. Two, he’s an exceptionally good gunslinger.

Indeed, the first episode revolves just pretty much about his mundane day to day life. And then at the end he goes for a job, and umm, kind of murders an entire family including two 6 year old girls. And then his actual target comes home, finds his family slaughtered, and Kaiden delivers him a message from his employer, and kills him.

This is our main character. And the main story kicks off when he’s contacted by some guy he used to know from the war named Dex. Telling him he’s got information about the high inquisitor (yeah, he’s involved in Kaiden’s back story a bit too). And to meet at a certain time and place. Kaiden goes there to find that it isn’t Dex waiting for him. But Gilligan. who was his best friend during the war before he defected, right before the end. The two argue, and almost come to shooting at each other. With Kaiden accusing Gilligan of turning his back on his comrades. And Gilligan accusing Kaiden and all their friends of being too stubborn and basically sacrificing their lives for a cause that didn’t matter any more. But before they start shooting, they realise that Dex must have set a trap for them to be in the same place at the same time. Just then a group of soldiers come in to try to take them down.

The plot goes on from there. And the overall story had like 5 seasons I think? I may probably go back and do this idea as a book. Everyone uses light guns to shoot, and the type of light gun people use is like, indicative of their character and things like that. A focal point of the show was fast and intense gunplay that didn’t wander out of the realms of realism too much. So something along the lines of John Wick. And of course loads of videogame references abound.

Haha, So that’s that. This went on for longer than I expected. And I didn’t proofread this post. So my apologies for any typos.

In return I’ll tag some of my other creative buddies. @thedevilishdouble, @mistbornhero, @zarina-the-nocturnal, @heyparadiamonds, @nellysketchesnstuff aaand @oceanblue971

If I didn’t tag you, and you see this post, and want to do it too. Please tag me in it so I can see the cool stuff you’re up to!

[nemrut]

Web-Series Novel: A Practical Guide to Evil by Erraticerrata

Title: A Practical Guide to Evil Author: Erraticerrata Status: Work in Progress 

Link: wordpress

Summary: The Empire stands triumphant.

For twenty years the Dread Empress has ruled over the lands that were once the Kingdom of Callow, but behind the scenes of this dawning golden age threats to the crown are rising. The nobles of the Wasteland, denied the power they crave, weave their plots behind pleasant smiles. In the north the Forever King eyes the ever-expanding borders of the Empire and ponders war. The greatest danger lies to the west, where the First Prince of Procer has finally claimed her throne: her people sundered, she wonders if a crusade might not be the way to secure her reign. Yet none of this matters, for in the heart of the conquered lands the most dangerous man alive sat across an orphan girl and offered her a knife.

Her name is Catherine Foundling, and she has a plan.

Words from the author: A Practical Guide to Evil is a YA fantasy novel about a young girl named Catherine Foundling making her way through the world – though, in a departure from the norm, not on the side of the heroes. Is there such a thing as doing bad things for good reasons, or is she just rationalizing her desire for control? Good and Evil are tricky concepts, and the more power you get the blurrier the lines between them become.

Updates every Monday and Wednesday, as of the latest Patreon goal.

So I burned through this in 4 days or so and yeah, there is a lot to love about it. Guess the initial similarities in its premise to Worm can't be denied, what with being a teenage girl who joins the villains in the hopes to do good and is pretty ruthless in order to reach her goal, while she befriends people on the side of the villains where some aren't that unreasonably while the people on the side of good aren't necessarily all nice or good either. Still, make no mistake, it very much does its own thing. The concept with the Names is just fascinating and really, really cool. The way the rules of storytelling influence the world and characters and the different ways the various characters have found to interact with them is really creative and interesting

I love the setting. It's a an awesome fantasy setting with the familiar faces that I want to see, like Roman legions, orcs, goblins, dwarves, gnomes and so on but also given a creative fresh spin that it doesn't feel like an unimaginative D&D or LotR rip-off. The fact that the dwarves and gnomes seem to be by all accounts the heavy hitters of the setting with whom no one dares to fuck with is a nice change, for example. The geopolitical snippets that we see where the different nations, cultures and coalitions clash and unfold has been one of the stories bigger strengths. The racial and cultural clashes between characters hailing from different nations and social classes has also been explored in a rather good manner. It also has a certain anime feel to it, in a good way, that just makes it even more enjoyable to be me. I also love the fact that gender barely plays a role in this. Whatever role, job, class or function, in all facets in nearly all cultures, everything basically has a roughly equal split in terms of genders, with the goblins being the sole exception with their matriarchal society, which in turn was already alien enough, being goblins and all. No token girl or token boy characters in anything and no "you can't because you're a girl" story line either, it's rare to see it like that. Just enjoyment of the journey the character is on. Same with sexuality, it doesn't matter to anyone in the setting which way you swing or if you swing at all, so various things can be explored without taking over the plot. The lead girl is bisexual, btw, with a leaning towards girls. One of my favorite things have got to be the quotes at the beginning of the chapters. They can be hilarious and many of them have this distinct Magic the gathering flavor text feeling to them. I love them. Quotes like   “Always mistrust these three: a battle that seems won, a chancellor who smiles and a ruler calling you friend.” – Extract from the personal journals of Dread Emperor Terribilis II

“I’ll be honest, Chancellor – revenge is the motivation for over half the decrees I’ve made.” – Dread Empress Sanguinia II, best known for outlawing cats and being taller than her”

or “Now kneel, fools, and witness my ascension to GODHOOD!” – Last words of Dread Empress Sinistra IV, the Erroneous

They generally crack me up and I am genuinely impressed that the author managed to come up with so many of them that are honestly lough out loud funny, well, at least to me. The dialog and witty banter has been consistently funny and energetic. I have laughed countless times and a lot of the side characters are lovable because of it. The good lines are not reserved for the main character alone but virtually everyone gets at least a few, it's rather balanced on that account. And it never becomes muddled enough that it makes the characters indistinguishable from each other, even if they share the same type of dark humor. By seeing when and on whose accounts they make the jokes, their characters still shine through. The fight scenes are decent, and the quirks and strengths of the setting and the dialog allow them to punch outside their weight-class. The meta aspects of the story itself are worked very well into the scenes and I believe that that is a very difficult thing to do. Here is a scene relatively early on: “We can get to that later,” I dismissed. “Evidently you’re the gritty type, but how far up the antihero scale are you?” 

“As far as I need to be,” he responded gravely. I pushed down my urge to make something out of that. Crossbow Tamika had already finished reloading, and the pair of them seemed to be considering their next target. I really wasn’t liking the way Spear Tamika was beginning to angle towards me.   “Are you the kind of gritty that works with enemies?” I probed. “You know, for the greater good and such.” A lesser author would have made me hate this but he pulled it off and made this fun.

More after the break but for anyone who wants to avoid even minor spoilers, give it a read, it’s awesome. Not perfect or anything as it does have its weaknesses but very well worth the read.

The side cast is funny and interesting. The 15th legion has some fun characters who are likable and enjoyable throughout. When talking about the Calamities and some others, things become downright amazing. The way they are introduced and then explored in their interludes on how they've built their legends meshes wonderfully with the more intimate and casual moments they share with each other when they just bicker and enjoy their company. I always hated the "if you lose you are dead to me" kinda villains and even though they are all very much villains, they also love and care for each other and generally having a personality allows for characters to have more depth, to have them care for more than just power. The Calamaties are larger than life, fun and epic. Which kinda flows into one of the not so much strengths of the story. Heiress is, as far as villains go...not exactly top notch. It doesn't help that while I do believe that she is a serious threat and annoyance, and that her plans are appropriately “oh shit” level, I still can't respect her because in her core, she is the stupid kind of villain, the short sighted backstabber who, as a character archetype, just isn’t that interesting, at least to me.     The clash of ideologies that very much defined books 1 and 2 between the Lone Swordsman, the Heiress and the Squire suffered under the fact that both the Lone Swordsman and the Heiress upheld positions that, well, sucked. It wasn't a matter of who was right because it was abundantly clear who was and that's the main character. The Lone Swordsman was a partly mindfucked/brainwashed zealot with few redeeming qualities and the Heiress just wants to be properly evil and hates all this efficiency, stability and success that the villain faction had for a while now. What is there to ponder? I guess I would have preferred antagonists who also had good paths/plans rather than just being flat-out wrong/evil. Heiress especially, who at all times has been the bigger danger simply because she cares only about being evil in the right way and is unable to prioritize anything else. Still, she isn’t terrible, she has interesting/fun aspects, it is fun to hate her even if I roll my eyes a lot and her dynamic with her father is fun, even if only for the inevitable scene where Cat will do something horrible to him in order to punish the Heiress. Catherine is a character who has some weaknesses but in general she is fun to follow, entertaining and someone who knows how to end a fight. She has good lines, one gets a good feel for her as the story goes along and it’s interesting if a bit frustrating when her own, culturally biased morals shine through. Like her inherent dislike and condemnation of human sacrifice despite the fact that she has about committed nearly every atrocity but since she is from Callow, that kinda thing is a no-no. It’s the arbitrary if not contradictory moral position of a true person.   I enjoy her journey and character and appreciate the way she deconstructs several conventions that are typical to the "want to save a society/nation/people" archetype. The story contained several digs at other stories, like this quote when they learn that the Heiress set her slave soldiers free.   Nominally granting the Stygian war-slaves their freedom meant absolutely nothing, when they’d been indoctrinated from birth to obey their orders of their owners without fail.

Which is basically the biggest "take that" I've seen in a while, directed at Dany's freeing of the Unsullied who in turn then moved by her actions chose to follow her nonetheless. And of course, Cat is absolutely correct. That one act of liberation probably didn't really mean that much to those who, in her words, had been indoctrinated from birth to obey and fight. Later on, when the Lone Swordsman comes upon them, he is also aware of this dilemma. His solution was to not ask them to fight, to give them that freedom but that more than anything was what convinced them to fight for him anyway, and thus he unwillingly manipulated them into doing it anyway. I really loved that touch, especially since it was a plot point that was well set up in advance, touched upon over several chapters and then had a rather satisfying resolution. Or the general theme of the shonen protag/hero of the story taking umbrage with the lesser methods of his enemies and saying that's not the right way because it's wrong. It's a conversation that that crops up all the time, and that the hero will find a better way, only never saying what that better way is, mainly because he hasn't one until he pulls unlimited power out of his ass.   Cat isn't like that and hates people like that and this inherent struggle against story conventions, especially with regards to the Black Knight is fascinating to me. Having the Calamaties and the Empress scheme and work around these inherent story elements is just cool. The romance in the story was rather lowkey which isn't bad per se,   but Killian didn't exactly leave a big impact so far but I'm hoping this will change with the recent developments. Either strike out with someone more interesting or have Killian become more interesting and defined. So far, it was pleasant and cute but not exactly much substance. One more minor point of complaint would be the relatively steady amount of typos, missing words and the like, which happen about once or twice per chapter. Nothing tragic but definitely noticeable. Author also uses adverbs a bit too much, especially the "-ly" modifiers for the verbs instead of showing it through action and dialog how they feel but it works for the most part.  Think that’s about it.  The writing is overall rather good and I enjoy the story format, what with the interludes and all. So yeah, really loving the story. Story got its hooks in me and I powered through and it was a blast from start to the latest available chapter. Supposed to be five books, and we're in the first third of the third one so, this story will be going on for a while and I'm looking forward to it.  4/5

[theloniuswomb-blog]

Spiderman: Homecoming Can Suck My Fucking Dick.

Holy Shit. Where do I even start with this film? I wanted to like it a lot. I was intrigued by the casting of Tom Holland as Spider Man. He came off well in the Marvel Civil War movie, I remember thinking to myself; “Hey! His part was funny! Just the right amount of awkward, slash, comical that I instantly recognize as Spider Man. Awesome!” Now, I usually have doubts about any superhero adaption since the hit to miss ratio is all over the place, but this I thought could work quite nicely.  I saw the trailer, and like the little whore that I am, it got me wet. Wet hot with sexual anticipation. The CGI looked impressive. The action sequences looked crisp and innovative, the tone of the shots were dark and brooding. I expected drama, emotion and a plot-line that, although may not be the most original, could perhaps come through with some good acting and a tight script; with some inspired direction thrown in for good measure. This was the package I was creating for myself in my brain. My golden goose's egg.  And, much like Verruca Salt, I made a big song and dance about it to everyone, throwing glitter and sheets of colored plastic all over the room. But also like Verruca Salt, I also got hit with the trap door. A trap door that golden eggs get shat down, and so do we, right along with em; to burn for all eternity while Gene Wilder laughs at our scorched bodies.  First off, let's start with the tone of the movie. It doesn't have one. It has no idea what kind of movie it wants to be. It's got this light hearted vibe when Spidey is around that feels completely alien to the murky goings on of the Vulture. You get scenes where Peter Parker is walking through the school, drooling over hot girls in the most forced and gormless way. (SPOILER: Most of the film is of Tom Holland looking gormless at everyone around him.) Juxtaposed with Michael Keaton straight up killing people in the most nonchalant way possible. It's kind of infuriating, it was like there were two movies going on in tandem and neither of them had any particular relevance to the other. I must say, Michael Keaton gave a fairly decent performance, but he could have been used so much better. I saw Birdman recently (something I couldn't ignore as a massive, quite probably intended irony of Keaton's career) and I was impressed. I had problems with that film too (But I'll leave that for another review) but overall the acting was really fucking solid. Like I say, I was impressed. But obviously, good acting doesn't matter anymore for films like this. I honestly thought the newer incarnations of Batman would have taught a lesson to the makers of these kinds of movies. But obviously not.  Let's get to Peter. Peter is the most insufferable character ever. He's meant to be very smart, yet doesn't use his brain once. Not only does he not use his brain to problem solve, but he doesn't use it for introspection at all. The amount of times he puts other people's lives at risk in this movie is astounding. If this feature of the plot was used as a tool to move Peter's character forward as he matures into a new and exciting world, I can forgive this whole problem. In fact, that's kind of what I wanted to see. Progression. But it never comes. Spider Man sees bad guys robbing the bank. He attacks, not even stopping when he realizes they have incredibly powerful weapons. He carries on and ends up blowing up a deli over the street of a man that earlier in the movie is established, that he knows. Not once does he show any remorse for this horrible incident. He ruined a man's career, livelihood, and potentially could have killed him if he happened to live above the shop.

In another instance, Parker sees bad guys driving; he attacks them on the highway where loads of other people could die from all the high tech weapons going off at high speeds. He knew the types of weapons they had but did it anyway. He could have followed them to their destination, found out where the base was, who was involved in the organization and work out a plan. He could even find out the buyers if he cased them for a few weeks. But this thought never crosses Peters mind. It's just attack all problems in the face until they die. I mean fuck, this is a whiz kid of physics and science, some of the most logical shit ever. Yet he can't even think up a simple fucking plan to take on his enemies? Honestly, it's so hard to relate to Peter in this movie. You'd have to be some kind of autistic sociopath in order to find him tolerable. After a while Tony Stark comes along. Fuck me, Robert Downey Jr. couldn't give one flying fuck about this movie. And it showed like hell. His whole character in the film was just him playing himself not caring in various tropical places. I honestly believe Tony Stark represented how little of a fuck the writers and director cared about this film. He was a direct mouthpiece for the writers of the movie to say “fuck you” to the audience. Honestly, every time Parker fucked up, Tony would say “Oi, Parker, stop fuckin around!” but never explains why. He never says “Hey, you could have killed people back there! Are you insane?” instead he half asses his reasons and when Parker questions him on it he just says “because I said so.” Like fuck, you'd think after the first time Spidey fucks up, that's the time to sit down and talk. Jesus Christ should you even wait for a first-time-fuck-up in this scenario? Tony Stark, one of the smartest men alive, waits for Spidey to fuck up three times, THREE TIMES, with the third seeing spider man nearly sinking a whole ship of people due to his negligence. Hundreds would have died. It's incredible.

So, Iron Man finally gives some punishment after this. He takes away Parkers new shiny Stark Spidey Suit, to which Parker says “I'm nothing without that suit!” to which Stark replies; “if you're nothing without this suit, you don't deserve it.” or something to that effect. Instead of Peter having a moment of clarity and saying “fuck, people nearly died, I nearly died. Maybe I need to switch up my game and show Iron Man I'm more mature than this. Show I can use some strategy and grow into this role I'm destined to have and finally use my genius brain to devise a plan.” Nope. That's wishful thinking partner and you can get shot around here for that kinda talk.  Instead what we get is Parker learning nothing, and him creating some kind of device that allows him to go out and fuck up even faster and directly than before. They use some kind of tracker map to find the Vulture, who is breaking into an airplane full of Stark weapons. An Iron Suit included. Now, what the actual fuck? I don't know if the Vulture knows this, but Iron Man can remotely control his suits. If one were stolen, you can bet your bottom dollar he'd activate it and cane your operation into next week. But the Vulture MUST have known that, since he remotely controlled his own mechanical wings to try and kill Parker earlier in the movie. So what in the actual fuck is this man doing? He's inviting Iron Man into his lair. Willingly. It's the most stupid thing ever. It also gives so little motivation for Parker to do anything about the situation. Once he realizes it's Stark tech, he should have left. Because Parker also knows Iron Man remotely controls his suits, there's a whole scene that points this out near the beginning of the film for fuck's sake. The Vulture would have been a goner immediately upon the knowledge of the hijacking. It's easily the most retarded part of the film.   So Spidey decides to go all-in despite knowing Iron Man could easily kill this guy remotely and nearly ends up causing this plane to crash all over the city, no doubt killing thousands of people. In fact, an engine falls out while they're fighting on the plane's wings. Parker shows no regard for that at all. No remorse for the people that no doubt were killed by the falling debris. Fortunately, Spidey manages to use his webs to bend the out-of-control plane wing and steer them to safety. (Well, he crashes the plane into a sandbank.) He takes down the Vulture and leaves him tangled at the scene old school Spidey style, with a note to boot. Wow. How amazing. And he did it all without his shiny suit! He overcame so many obstacles and shortcomings, we really went on a journey there with old Petey boy there. Oh wait, that was the film I was daydreaming about while I was being shat on by this movie. Upon Stark learning of this situation, he instantly has Spider Man brought to the new headquarters of the Avengers, where he was about to announce Spider Man as a new, key member, along with an even better shiny suit. Like, what? Seriously? This kid needs a dressing down, not a new three piece. But it doesn't come. All we get is Parker declining the offer, you get a mild sense that he realizes that he's in over his head, and maybe this is all a bit much for him. But it's not really expressed very well. It all feels so odd and disjointed. I mean here we have Iron Man, the guy who cared about people dying from collateral damage in Civil War; who hunted down the Winter Soldier because he was a danger to the public, (who also for some reason killed Tony's parents,) caused a rift with the current most powerful heroes and his teammates, as he also wanted them to register their identities to an official data base to help reign them in and hold them accountable. Yet for some reason Tony couldn't give the time of day to say “Hey kid, tone it down you're getting crazy out there.”  I'll stop ragging on the film soon, but before I do, I want to mention the love interest. This was one of the most wooden romances I've ever seen. No chemistry. She was called Lizzy. It turns out Mary Jane is the other sarcastic girl who makes the closest things to jokes in the movie. Which I liked, but they didn't do nearly enough with. Again, there was an opportunity for him to grow with this character, have his attention turned to MJ, have him realize this Lizzy girl was a bit vacuous and boring, while this other girl was interesting and fun. But again it didn't happen. Instead, Lizzy moves away because of plot reasons that I won't give away, and MJ is merely hinted at as the new romance for the next film. Which is fucking boring. Honestly, it's so dull. I hated all the romance scenes. I wanted to like them, I mean shit, the girl was so hot. They even get an ass shot of her in her bikini. I was like “wow these are meant to be 15-year-old kids, what are they thinking? Isn’t this inappropriate for a kids movie?” (They are not 15-year-old kids, just to clarify. But for the plot, they were). They could have used this screen time to have Peter reflecting on his Uncle Ben, or bonding with his Aunty. Who, in my opinion, should have been told about the Spider Man thing. I think her knowing earlier in the film would have been a good dynamic to use. He should have told her right away after his first fuck up. I know it might deviate from traditional Spider Man lore, but as a film, it would've been a much more interesting watch. Aunt May is such a central figure to the Spider Man universe, as is the Uncle Ben storyline, but neither are given any sort of focus. Overall this film is garbage. In true Warski style, it was Garbage. Full on trash. I hated Guardians of the Galaxy less, and that's saying something. That is really saying something. Because that movie was awful. For Spider Man I have to say: the overall plot was good, but there were so many missed opportunities that it became more like a midlife crisis by the end. The choices to make for this story seemed so obvious, it was almost like they were purposefully not taking the logical steps in the narrative in order to make this movie as painful as possible. (Because the razor wire they'd jammed way up in your ass, to the tune of £13.50 for 3D, just wasn't quite painful enough.) Fuck this movie, nobody should see it, I hope it fucking bombs in the box office. Which it won't because, like the little whores that we are, we're all just gonna fan-boy for Spidey like we always do. I honestly regret spending money on this. Don't even buy the DVD, it's not worth it.

Before I go I need to mention something else; humor. Peter was not funny. He had moments of fun, sure. But he was not funny. Peter Parker is witty. He is known for wit, not fun. Again, this could have been used as a plot device to show his coping mechanism for dealing with such raw shit all the time. He exudes wit and comedy in the face of danger, then behind closed doors doubts himself. Like fuck, is a 15-16 year old really meant to be doing this shit? Getting involved in weapon trafficking and the criminal world after his Uncle Ben being shot and killed? As an aside, thank god they didn't make us re-live Uncle Ben's death. I was glad they kept that as a past event that we didn't need to see. One of the few good touches of the film. You could say it was like wiping just a bit of shit off your arse with your finger. There's not quite as much shit there anymore, but now it's on your finger, so. There you go.  So, what's my ultra biased and not subjective at all, star rating for this film? 1.5 out of 5. Some action was good, the 3D sucked, the acting sucked, the writing sucked, the CGI was good, Michael Keaton was good, everyone else didn't give a shit and ultimately it showed. Don't see this film. Boycott it harder than Isreal.

[arcaneranger]

Final Thoughts - Spring 2018

Oh, I am so very late on this one, but in my defense, I did warn that I had too much to watch during the spring, so much so that I actually have to have MAL open in another tab while I’m writing this just to remember everything.

I’ll start with what I skipped.

* Tokyo Ghoul:re, FLCL Alternative, Hozuki’s Coolheadedness Season 2 and High School DxD Hero because I have neither watched the previous seasons nor read the manga.

* Cutie Honey Universe and Gurazeni because by the time I would have gotten to them, I had only heard bad things.

* Dragon Pilot: Hisone to Masotan because Netflix picked it up and we’ll have to wait until September for it.

* Gegege no Kitaro because I didn’t hear any buzz about it and frequently forget that it even exists, I’ll get around to it if enough people ask me to.

* Full Metal Panic! Invisible Victory because Funimation has inexplicably removed the dub from VRV and that’s how I want to experience it.

* Kakuriyo: Bed and Breakfast for Spirits because I already watched Konohana Kitan and didn’t see much of a difference.

* Captain Tsubasa because Viz licensed it and then just kinda sat on it everywhere except the Philippines.

* Inazuma Eleven because it just went completely unlicensed/unloved.

So, with those out of the way, from the bottom to the top, here’s everything I did manage this season.

Worst of the Season: Fist of the Blue Sky Re:Genesis (2/10)

Oh my god, it’s just the ugliest thing this side of Berserk. I don’t remember a damn thing about this one, and I’d bet that most people who watched it are with me on this one, because I was just distracted by how astoundingly awful the CG production in this show is.

Butlers x Battlers (3/10)

Ugh, what a boring slog of a premiere. I still pretty vividly remember this one, if only because it’s so painfully generic that it swung all the way around to be memorable again. Butlers spent almost its entire first episode on absolutely nothing before remembering in the last five minutes that it was supposed to have a plot and smash-cutting to it in the middle of a scene.

Caligula (3/10)

Where to start? After one of the most interesting premieres of the season, this adaptation pretty immediately sank into complete nonsense, and it’s such a massive waste of potential that this was the work of the writers behind the original Persona titles. Caligula is a show where the main characters literally forget the plot is happening and decide to go to a theme park while they’re trapped in a virtual world with a bunch of digi-zombies trying to murder them. Are you kidding me?

Devils’ Line (3/10)

I just did my write-up for this, so it’s a little fresher in my mind, but honestly, it’s just Twilight with adults and the edge factor turned up, and it looks damn silly trying to be as serious as it is. Sentai needs to choose a little more carefully than this if they want to promote their new service.

Libra of Nil Admirari (3/10)

This one was just so boring to look at that I don’t remember anything except that books were evil and it was a visual novel adaptation.

Dances With the Dragons (4/10)

I’m aware that I use the word “generic” an awful lot, but this season’s worst had quite a lot of that quality, and it applies here, too. Trying its hardest to be a mid-aughts grimdark action piece, it just does almost nothing interesting in its premiere, aside from giving the protagonist an already-existing girlfriend, which may have just been an attempt to quell any yaoi-baiting the two main dudes have going for them, because her only qualities demonstrated were “can’t cook” and “looks hot”.

Real Girl (4/10)

As I said in my write-up, I wanted so badly to like this one, but you need a budget of more than fifty cents to make an anime, and nearly every shot betrays just how little the studio was working with. We’re talking about the kind of show where the main cast goes to a summer festival, and appear to be the only people there. The story and writing just aren’t enough to make me put up with it.

Gundam Build Divers (4/10)

What a total letdown from this franchise. Fighters was an incredibly well-written show that was aimed at kids but could appeal to all Gundam fans, Try was divisive but the people that liked it (like me) got a lot out of it, but Divers just flounders. A relatively decent first episode gives way to episode after episode of Villain of the Week shenanigans that I cannot bring myself to care about because the main cast just aren’t interesting; they’re pretty much just generic shonen cardboard cutouts. This was one case where I was almost hoping for a sudden death game turnaround, because the idea of a bunch of kids being trapped in a game with lots of adults and giant robots would at least be a workable plot, but just fighting Team Rocket over and over again is boring schlock.

Magical Girl Ore (4/10)

I held out hope for too long on this one, but I had an inkling from the beginning that the humor was just going to turn me way, way off, and I was right. This one just carried too many bad implications if you thought about it, and they all piled up and crashed down on me the more I tried to keep going.

Magical Girl Site (4/10)

This show just couldn’t stay above water. The writing only got dumber as the plot carried on, and the fact that I was still watching became embarrassing, because most of the community watched one episode of this and dropped it like a hot rock. Hopefully I’ve learned my lesson.

Darling in the FRANXX (5/10)

What total bull, huh? I’ve never seen public opinion on a show turn around as fast as the community ripped Darling to shreds. While it’s visually gorgeous (most of the time), the writing in the second half of the show is just humiliating to everyone involved, as the script becomes a child Godzilla-stomping through a carefully-constructed castle of wood blocks. Once again, I yearn for Inferno Cop.

Persona 5 the Animation (5/10)

I said for the longest time during the lead-up to P5A that I didn’t really see the point of it. Persona 5 is the fastest-selling game in the franchise, and ultimately an adaptation would only serve to recap the plot, because that’s all it would have time to do in only six months. I actually enjoyed Persona 4 The Golden Animation, because it sold itself as a companion piece to the existing plot rather than a retread of it, and seeing the Scooby Gang just hanging out more was precisely what I wanted from it. A-1 Pictures just didn’t learn enough from the sins of Ace Attorney, because while this is better, it’s still not worth watching if you’ve played the game.

Last Period (5/10)

This one got some early buzz for halfway-decent production work and a skewering of gacha-based RPGs, but ultimately ended up repeating itself so often that it became boring, and sidelining the highlight of the show (the villain trio Wiseman) into having barely a few lines per episode. Just goes to show what happens when repeated gags get stale.

Now that those are out of the way, we can get to the stuff I actually finished!

Legend of the Galactic Heroes: Die Neue These (6/10)

Barely worth watching for how badly condensed the plot is, and barely worth talking about until the movies happen. That’s assuming we actually get them stateside, but I won’t hold my breath on that one. I coulodn’t even find a decent GIF for this one.

Crossing Time (6/10)

A fun, yet not especially memorable set of vignettes about people waiting for the train to go by. Some of the episodes were less enjoyable than others, but still worth a watch if only because it’ll only take you half an hour and anything you don’t like will probably be over quickly.

Golden Kamuy (6/10)

The last thing I finished for the season, Golden Kamuy’s failure to live up to high expectations lies in its inability to focus on its serious tone, constantly inserting dick jokes into its brutal fight scenes and dragging a poop joke on for entirely too long throughout the show, but it’s still good-looking enough to be worth watching, and it was the only decent show this season to pull out the announcement of a continuation in its last episode, without which it probably wouldn’t have gotten a pass from me.

Umamusume: Pretty Derby (7/10)

I still am amazed by the legwork that went into this silly little mobile game adaptation. While parts of it remain half-assed and unnecessary (the random idol performances being at the top of that list), it’s still a competently-written story about a protagonist who won’t let anything stop her from being The Very Best Like No One Ever Was, and I never get tired of that. The constant timeskips do get a little hard to keep track of, though.

Wotakoi: Love is Hard for Otaku (7/10)

This one could have been improved by just tweaking a few things. While the characters were endearing and the comedy on-point, the story needed a little interference just so that we didn’t end the final episode in pretty much the same place as the second, because I didn’t get any sense of progress in the main relationship. Still, totally worth a watch if you were disappointed by the news that Recovery of an MMO Junkie was directed by a Nazi.

Comic Girls (7/10)

A very cute story of four artists living together and sharing their passion for manga. This one grew on me a lot over its run, and while I had been pretty certain it would be a 6, a satisfying ending and unnecessarily pretty production elevated it, and I’m glad I wound up finishing it.

Sword Art Online Alternative: Gun Gale Online (8/10)

This one has the distinction of being the first review I got hate mail for, because I said that Sigsawa was a far better writer than Kawahara and that the female characters in Alternative actually had agency, and boy are those things true. As it turns out, without Kirito-sama, Sword Art Online can actually be decent, or even great. A solid buildup, well-defined characters (that don’t want to bang the main character!) and a spectacular climax lead up to the best story in the franchise. Can’t wait for Alicization to bring SAO crashing back down to mediocrity-at-best.

Tada-kun Never Falls in Love (8/10)

The only HIDIVE show I finished this season! And the best of three romantic comedies we got this spring, because it gave us the progression and satisfaction that Monthly Girls’ Nozaki-kun wasn’t able to. While it hit a few stumbling blocks, Tada-kun was brought up at least two full points by its fantastic ending, and that was a great surprise since I was really skeptical going into the final few episodes, as they are a big shift in tone and setting from the rest of the show, but the story pulled it off brilliantly.

Hinamatsuri (8/10)

The funniest show of the season, hands-down, Hinamatsuri is the strange tale of a girl with psychic powers from another dimension coming to live with her new yakuza dad, and the hilarity that ensues. Hina herself is a great character, as her dimwittedness is the basis for a lot of the comedy in this show, but the real heart is Anzu, and the coming-of-age journey she takes over the course of the story. This series shows a great and uncommon sympathy to the downtrodden members of Japanese society, and ultimately is able to bring every character’s arc to a meaningful and satisfying conclusion...except for one. Shame about that final episode.

Food Wars: The Third Plate (9/10)

I’m surprised at the lack of heat I’ve gotten about my opinion on Food Wars, and maybe it’s because I’ve been too subtle about my feelings, so I’ll spell them out clearly now: Food Wars is better than My Hero Academia, and you should be watching it.

Lostorage Conflated WIXOSS (9/10)

Man, was this a satisfying turnaround from the disappointment that was incited. The decision to bring the original cast back for a Massive Multiplayer Team-Up was a great one, and meant that almost every character, but especially Midoriko, got the conclusion they really needed. I’m hoping that this is the end for this franchise, if only so it can go out on its highest note. Oh, also, the soundtrack is still awesome.

Best of the Season:...

...

...

MEGALOBOX (10/10)

This shouldn’t surprise anyone, because MEGALOBOX was perfect from beginning to end and anybody who watched it is well aware of that fact. The sleeper hit of the season was everything the first episode promised; a gritty, 90′s-flavored story of one man’s journey to prove himself the best, and damn the consequences. MEGALOBOX is so great that it’s difficult to pick out individual elements of its awesomeness, but special mention should go to the music, because it is amazing. The OST of this one should go down in history along with that of Bebop as the best that anime has to offer.

[her-culture]

There's an Animation Revolution Coming and We Need to Pay Attention

There is an animation revolution coming and we really need to start paying more attention to it. If you were born during the 1990’s, you experienced what I like to call the “Golden Age” of cartoon series in America. This was when Cartoon Network actually had a huge set list of cartoons for children, as well as provided exposure to Japanese animation (i.e. Sailor Moon, Dragon Ball Z, and Pokémon), before Spongebob was the face of Nickelodeon, and you didn't have to go to some other channel to enjoy quality cartoons from Disney.

We may not have noticed it when we were young, but a lot of these cartoons actually had depth in the sense of the lessons we should be applying to our lives. The Powerpuff Girls taught to us all that you should always fight for justice, no matter what kind of person you are; Kim Possible showed us that you could be a girly girl and still kick some ass; Pokémon stimulated our imaginations, and motivated our sense of adventure. Those are just a few examples, but for each person, it was different.

Unfortunately, after the early 2000’s, there was a decline in quality animated shows for kids. For the longest time, if you weren’t into anime (Japanese animation) then all you really had to choose from were shows like Dora the Explorer or Family Guy. There was no good in-between, until now.

Like I said, Cartoon Network used to have a huge set list of cartoons until recently. They were the cartoon elitists. It is literally a network for cartoons. And it’s not like they haven’t noticed. Whenever Cartoon Network does a movie special, there is a segment where all their cartoon characters gather in an imaginary movie theater to “watch” with us. During my childhood, the theater was always full. But that was in the early 2000’s. In 2012, there was a photo going around on the internet showing that they brought this segment back, However, instead of an imaginary theater with a huge crowd full of a variety of characters, there were about ten characters. The photo compared the 2002 version to the 2012 version, and it was very depressing. Most of the characters in the 2002 version are now found on Cartoon Network’s sister channel Boomerang, a channel meant to show Cartoon Network originals that are 10+ years old.

Cartoon humor in the 90’s was arguably crude but not necessarily in a negative way. It was full of a lot of sarcasm (to say the least) or poking fun at real life social issues going on. Some cartoons like The Proud Family were explicit about these issues, whereas cartoons like The Powerpuff Girls would touch on issues without explicitly saying which ones they were talking about.

Suddenly, the only cartoons that actually related to real life issues were featured on adult cartoons channels, leaving children with  no real exposure on how to actually deal with real life social issues. I found this to be a real issue. Media is very influential, and most kids watch cartoons. People seemed to forget that cartoons can be educational, as well as entertaining, and sometimes can be a lot easier for children to retain information from them because it sparks their imaginations.

The only cartoon that seemed to still be doing this during this period of animated decline was Avatar: The Last Airbender. When the series ended in 2008, there seemed to be an uproar. People were craving a good plot filled with life lessons. Then in 2010, Adventure Time debuted, a new and satisfactory aesthetic of cartoon expectations began to arise.

We are in a time where the values of diversity and relatability are targeted more often by audiences, especially by us millennials. This is because we want future generations to feel as included as possible, because despite the great shows we watched while growing up, there was still a lack of diversity from race to sexuality. We also, as a society, seem to ignore the age group of eight- to twelve-year-olds who are not quite young enough that they need cartoons to learn how to count, but also should not be exposed to the crudeness of Family Guy and the like. It is when Adventure Time debuted that this age group started to actually receive attention. This period of development between ages eight and twelve is so important, because this is the stage when kids develop prime social skills and do so through what they see, especially on TV.

However, sometimes kids don’t want to watch actual people on TV. I know, because I was one of those kids. So we need to have a little something for everybody. Adventure Time definitely started out as something that seemed like 15 to 20 minutes of nonsense, but as it gained popularity, it also gained more depth.

The series follows the adventures of Finn, the last human on earth, and Jake, his adoptive brother who is a magical dog, in the Land of Ooo. As the series progressed, it sparked several conspiracy theories from fans and the creators of the show went off of those theories, created storylines for episodes that either validated or invalidated them. The episodes would provide life lessons about being who you want to be, having trust in others and yourself, not letting people take advantage of you, and much more. The show also grew with the audience. The voice of Finn has admitted that as Finn got older, he would change the pitch of his voice to match the time that has passed.

This show paved the way for more shows with solid plot lines filled with life lessons like Gravity Falls, Star vs. the Forces of Evil, and–my personal favorite–Steven Universe to make an impact. All of these shows have a complex story line and/or diverse and relatable characters. In their own unique ways, they teach kids life lessons in similar ways as cartoons in the 90’s did.

A lot of these shows are very popular with millennials, which is not a bad thing. Millennials are arguably the most nostalgic generation. Growing up happened in a blink of an eye to a lot of us. To get the feeling of being a kid again is something that drives us, to some degree. It is the diversity of these cartoons that is attractive to us. Star vs. the Forces of Evil features a Latino main protagonist; Steven Universe fights the stigma of hyper-masculinity with a cast of mostly people of color and several strong female characters; Gravity Falls features an eccentric, strong, and girly main character and emphasizes the importance of healthy familial relationships. When we see something that remotely relates to our childhood, we try to hold onto it and keep it as pure as possible. Thus, our interest in these cartoons keeps views up without us asking to alter in any way to make it seem more “adult”. With millennials being interested in these kinds of animated shows, it leads to a “trickle down” theory in a way. Let me explain.

For the most part, cartoons for adults really only include crude, insensitive humor. The Simpsons was the only adult cartoon that had some kind of depth to it until recently and somehow, Seth MacFarlane managed to dominate the adult animation game. Even so, the same trope was followed: dumb, unattractive father; attractive housewife who is either equally dumb or slightly smarter, and is secretly unhappy in some aspect of her marriage, which is tested constantly; daughter who does not fit in, and is ridiculed either by the rest of the family and/or the society around her (or daughter who is slut-shamed for being sexually active); dumb, reckless son; and baby who is secretly smarter than everyone in the house. This can only be entertaining for so long, and Seth MacFarlane managed to make three shows (Family Guy, American Dad, and The Cleveland Show) with these exact same tropes, making them get older even faster.

Then in 2011, Bob’s Burgers debuted. It was another animated sitcom about a family living their everyday life. However, the difference was that the tropes had a little bit of a spin. You have Bob and Linda who are actually happily married. When they fight, it is never serious enough where the plot is focused on it. They encourage each other, and neither of them are smarter than the other per se. Then there are their children Tina, Gene,and Louise. Tina is a very confident, socially awkward teen whose means for going about things is never attacked for it by her family. When she is attacked for how she is by people in the society around her, her family comes to her rescue without hesitation. Gene, the only boy, is arguably very genderfluid but again, never attacked for it. This aspect of Gene is also never used as a means of tension between him and his father. Louise is very eccentric and, you guessed it, never attacked for it. Instead, the whole family accepts the kind of person she is. Also, all of the children act as they would in their respective age groups despite the jokes that are made and the audience is definitely reminded. As a collective, the family is weird but they are all super supportive of each other, something that was only really seen on The Simpsons. But even then, the supportiveness was usually seen  after they were encouraged to suppress it, or after a family member  was ridiculed by another . Bob’s Burgers  has also demonstrated  respect to pronouns with a recurring character named Marshmallow: a transwoman for whom the family always makes sure to use the pronouns “she” and “her”. Bob’s Burgers has been running for a good six years now and has been very successful. The show is still has some adult humor, but it is not as crass as that of any of Seth MacFarlane’s past creations.

We are entering a new age of cartoons that needs all the attention it can get. We need to make sure that kids of all ages have access to life lessons no matter what form of media they decide to look at. It is our job as millennials, and also the duty of parents, to make sure access to these shows is readily available. I love cartoons and I really think you should too.