#please god reply with more of these

[crimeronan]

Imagine Luz waking up in the in between realm and seeing the fight with the cubes. Seeing Hunter’s desperate fury and Belos’s struggle to finish him off 👀. The fight could probably be big enough to alert some people. Perhaps… even Lilith and Amity? Who just arrive and see Luz lying there…? Belos being like “he killed the princess, get him”, while Amity and Lilith know that’s not possible and are just shellshocked. All the while Luz is in the in between watching everything go down and desperately wanting to go kick Belos’s ass and tell everyone she’s actually ok and the titan is cool.

When she eventually comes back as Titan Luz, Belos’s christian puritan ass being so freaking shocked he’s like wait a minute you were dead. What did you see? How are you back? And then she delivers the final blow, “i can talk to the titan bish and he hates you” and bam destroys him.

What would even go on in Hunter’s mind? Belos’? Amity’s? Luz as she wakes up and realizes she’s dead? OooOooOoo goodness I LOVE THIS

HELL YEAH, LET'S GET LILITH AND AMITY IN HERE. always need as many people to witness the temporary character death as possible. Maximum Drama Baybey

belos going from trying to kill hunter to an immediate "he's MURDERED my POOR SWEET DAUGHTER" as soon as there are witnesses.... jesus christ. yeah that's on brand.

i think lilith would freeze and not know how to react, at first. but amity.....

this is back early enough in the timeline that amity and hunter aren't yet friends -- if anything, they're the Opposite of friendly. so hunter shouts at amity that he's Lying, he's making it up, he killed luz, don't LISTEN to him-

but he doesn't expect it to Work. because amity is a coven soldier before she's anything else. and amity only knows hunter as someone who can be violent, and nasty, and cruel.

except, like. amity has Seen hunter interact with luz. she knows he loves her, even if she doesn't exactly Get It. and more importantly, hunter is clearly out of his fucking mind with grief. and pain. while belos is clearly trying to save face.

so amity is like. yeah. alright. the emperor is full of bullshit.

time to wreck my entire life for a guy i hate!!

and she jumps into the fight. to protect hunter. i'm particularly fond of the idea of her dragging him across the room with teleportation magic & hunter being like "no, blight, you've gotta believe me, LISTEN to me" while she's like SHHH. SHUT UP SHUT UP DUMBASS. LET ME GET YOU OUT OF THIS

except belos makes it clear that he intends to execute hunter on the spot. and amity is like. well. unfortunately i will Not be holding him still for you. so. i guess we have to fight :/

and you Know that the moment belos lashes out at amity, lilith is going to go apeshit. the luz situation might make her freeze in horror/uncertainty, but when amity is threatened, lilith can move So Fucking Fast.

SOOOOOO fucking fast.

Delicious. touches the soil.

[lordofthemushrooms]

I’m sensing some themes again while I’m in the early stages of being in love with Jon Sims

Oz. Solas. Jonathan….this has to stop happening to me

[alonetogether]

i did not want to be That Guy but literally if i keep seeing that the only tags ppl leave on that peterick bunk cuddling art is about petes ass i swear i WILL start biting people like i know it’s meant for fun and trust me it was funny to me to begin with too but having smth like that said over and over. without any sort of like further. compliment or excitement at least after is just disheartening at this point

[wisecrackingeric-2]

Luis ramble time

TW//homophobia??

I think my favorite thing about Luis has to be the idea that his religious trauma led him to become homophobic but not in the sense of how it normally is. I think he internalized it as he grew up in a Catholic setting and became more interested in other people. This is why I believe he probably wouldn't have kissed Leon,,he will flirt and make flirty gestures but I don't really believe he'd full on go for it. I think it's more believable that he would've felt guilty because we all know one thing Luis still holds dear is his religion.

To me Luis is bisexual and when he met Leon it made him remember those odd feeling but he was to afraid to express them both from fear of loosing Leon and the feeling of being sinful. (this comes from someone who connects to Luis in these regards,,dw I came to terms with myself awhile ago!) And just like everything else in his life he ran away from it and ultimately..

He never let himself feel those emotions nor tell Leon

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO GET TO BUT YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW FERAL I WENT OVER THIS I STARTED GOING DOWN SUCH A LONG RABBIT HOLE OUUUUGHHH

BUT YOURE SO RIGHT YOU HAVE A BIT BEAUTIFUL BRAIN IT HURTS SM,,,,,,,, I think you’re absolutely right but I wanted to add my own headcannons too cuz I think it could be a very very interesting discussion!!!!!! I’ve put my thoughts under the cut so it doesn’t clog up peoples dashboards!!!!

I couldn’t agree more I think it’d be pretty safe ro say Luis has a FAIR BIT of internalised homophobia from his religious upbringing (now I wanna clarify that I don’t have any religious trauma like, at all, I wasn’t brought up relifious but I have TONS of friends who’ve gone through it so I’ve done my best to understand it best I can!!!!) and where my headcannon sliiiiiiiightly differs from yours is that I think Luis probably would have come to terms with his own queerness by the time he’s working with Umbrella

Obviously he’s already very flamboyant and VERRRRYYY flirty w both men and women and he’s clearly confident in himself- but what a lot of people seem to forget that the lovely @blveherb and @possessionisamyth have gone into detail about is that Luis is an immigrant, and if you look at literally any piece of history from before like,,,, roughly around the 80’s queer and immigrant history were REALLY intertwined, like, the two communities would often be at the same places or facing the same struggles at the same time etc and obviously white historians haven’t done us any favours with preserving this history (and ALSO also i am WHITE AS ALL HELL so im obviously not in a position to be speaking on topics that i dont fully understand/havent affected me which is why i ask that if anyone is more knowledgable on the topic please do elaborate on it!!!!!!!)((also it’s obviously very very important not to try and take away focus from or erase poc history when talking about queer history!!!!!!!!!!!!!))

So I don’t think it would be much of a stretch to say that Luis, after leaving Valdelobos and ending up wherever he did, would have also discovered the queer community as a whole just by virtue of being apart of a minority (again, this isn’t something that’s ever even remotely effected me so please if I’ve made any mistakes or if anyone wants to point anything out do so!!!!) also I just imagine that, in general, Luis would’ve been grateful for any kind of community to fall back on after he left his own- how old he was when he left is unknown obviously but I can’t imagine being barely even an adult discovering the big wide world for the first time after spending your entire life in a tiny rural catholic village would’ve been easy which is why communities like that are so important (also you could absolutely go into how Umbrella would’ve fed that need for a community even further in a young naive Luis but that’s getting ahead of the subject)

Also somewhat on and off topic but M A A N Y historians have pointed out that Don Quixote is a pretty queer fricken book. That’s an entirely different discussion in and of itself but the whole book itself, the relationship between Alonso and Sancho, the history itself surrounding the book etc can leave a lot of queer interpretations to be read (and @highball66 has pointed out that while not specifically a term used for gay men, in some areas ‘Sancho’ has been used to refer to ‘the other guy in the relationship’, ie the man the husband is sleeping with etc) ((AND also it’s just,, kinda hard to analyse super old books through the lens of the LGBTQ+ community as we understand it roday- Kaz Rowe on YouTube has some good videos on the topic I can’t reccomend enough!!!!))

And so I personally like to imagine that by the time he returns BACK to Valdelobos, he’s probably come to terms with it- but like most traumas, returning to the place where it all started and manifested probably would’ve brought up those same feelings of internalised homophobia like you’ve said; which is why he’s so afraid to confess to Leon. Even if he KNOWS he’s come to terms with his identity n such, that doesn’t mean that returning to the place where it all started doesn’t bring back up those old feelings (also him returning home in the manor that he does just makes my theory/headcannon that he’s Trans go WILD but I’m saving that for ANOTHER DAY)

‘He holds Religion very Close to him’ GOD YOURE SO RIGHT ABT THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like even if he doesn’t still believe in god or anything his upbringing still effects him!!!!!!!!!!!!! He still always does the sign of the cross whenever he sees a dead body and obviously that classic catholic guilt and need to repent follows his every actions alongside just, y’know, the average amount of guilt people would feel in his situation BCNEHENDJDND so can you imagine how much WORSE he’d feeling going BACK to Valdelobos and meeting LEON and having all those feelings and fears come up again???????????? OUGH WHY MAKE ME THINK ABT THIS OP /lh

AND and, like you mentioned, Luis always has this reoccurring theme of thinking he has more time than he actually has and that he can run away from anything. It’s honestly so so so very tragic; and just the idea of that cycle repeating AGAIN in something SO PERSONAL (ie, his love for Leon) is just,,,,,,,,,, o u g h it’s so heartbreaking man why would you say that I am strangling you /jjjjjjjj

Luis always thinks he has more time to fix his mistakes, to be a better person- and even when he starts to realise he doesn’t, he still holds out hope. He thinks, ‘tomorrow I’ll tell Leon’, but he never gets that opportunity.

And finally this one is purely self indulgent but I’ve always pictured Luis as being the kind of person to just be happy labelling himself as ‘queer’ cuz it’s quick and convinient but BISEXUAL LUIS SL TRUE

(Also obligatory ‘these are just headcannons/theories/analysis nobody is saying these are CANNON this is just an observation’ message!!!!!!!)

[taylorsabrina]

just watched the taste music video.... i am FLOORED!!!!!

[harukapologist]

(deep breath) do you hqve more 0105 plato headcanons (said while feverishly girpping a pen and paper and shaking)

YESYESYES I certainly do!! (pat pat) this will be a little messy I'm afraid but I will try to make it as coherent as possible I just love rambling about headcanons eheh (ALSO, I'm so sorry for the late reply my exams aren't letting me catch a break AAAAAA)

-Shidou notices the signs of extreme neglect & emotional abuse in haruka's behavior IMMEDIATELY (cause Yaknow. being a doctor he must have at least some understanding of psychology ) and he gets so so protective of him, especially because haruka somewhat resembles one of shidou's kids. He tries his best to soothe Haruka's anxious behavior

Like Haruka would accidentally drop something and it breaks, a glass maybe that he was getting for Shidou, and absolutely freaks out like "OH MYGOD IM SO SORRY ILL DO BETTER I SWEAR IM SORRY" and gets super scared that he'll get yelled at or hurt and Shidou is so patient with him, putting a hand on his shoulder and reassuring him that he's not upset, that it's ok to make a mistake and he can help Haruka clean up the shattered glass, no problem.

-Similarly when Haruka is trying to talk to Shidou about something but keeps stuttering, and eventually he gets so anxious about bothering Shidou with his speech struggles that he just goes "uh actually nevermind I'm sorry-" but Shidou quickly stops him from leaving and hes like "No no it's okay, keep going. I'm listening :)"

-Generally he encourages Haruka a lot when he wants to talk but is struggling, feeling anxious, feeling self-conscious. He reassures Haruka that 1. he's not mad at him or bothered by him, in fact he is very happy to listen! and 2. he's very proud of Haruka for trying!!

-He helps Haruka with his anxiety too, he teaches Haruka breathing exercises, he gives safer alternatives to the gripping his palms thing. At first Haruka is too shy to tell Shidou that some of the methods he gave him aren't working, but at one point Shidou tells him that it's ok if he hasn't found the right alternatives yet, it'll take time and not everything works for everyone ,,,.....

-I hc that Haruka has a weak immunity because his mom probably neglected him that much, to the point he didn't have regular doctor visits or checkups. Whenever Haruka gets sick, Shidou stays by his side not just to treat him, but to help him feel less lonely... He asks Haruka about his special interest(s) and listens to him ramble :D (IN FACT I DREW THIS... just a doodle Im not sure if youd like to see it but well here it is... , hehe)

-In my half-joke post milgram AU where all the prisoners kidnap Haruka and Amane from their households and Mikoto quits his job, Shidou drives Haruka (+ Amane, Yuno, Muu depending if any of the four don't want to walk) home from school!!! He asks him how his day went and helps Haruka with homework if he needs to!!

-speaking of homework. Shidou can get a little scary/strict when grading and helping with homework...,,.. but he makes sure to be patient with Haruka and explains anything he didn't understand as gently and clearly as he could. Haruka is still a little intimidated everytime Shidou helps but he appreciates him ehehhe

-when Shidou is reading a book in his free time Haruka approaches him like "what are u readimg... :o" and sits next to him and they read together. and they start to have a little "reading time" from this point onwards (I THINK I SAW ANOTHER HC OF HARUKA AND SHIDOU READING. . If it was yours THANK YOU FOR IT ITS ONE OF MY FAVORITE HCS EVER. Shidou helps Haruka get better at reading cause he gets overwhelmed with like. big blocks of text. and getting into things that aren't related to his special interest. :3c

I'm sorry this was longer than expected uuu I actually wanted to put more but I'm sorry for rambling so much,... I hope u like these!!!

[crossbackpoke-check]

Substance, Shadow, and Spirit [remixed, abridged] by Tao Yuanming

[rithmeres]

genuinely these panels are going to make me ugly cry

[0lympian-c0uncil]

Like. Demeter being blind (/blinded, as I hc) would represent/symbolize a lot in her domain of life. Plants are resilient, ya know? Like weeds will grow no matter how much you tear at them or flatten them and trees will stand tall through anything because what the fuck else would they do? Submit to humans, or animals? Life does not care about who, why, or how they came to being, it will stubbornly still persist until the end

And Demeter will be damned before she ever lets her blindness be any more of a fact of nature. The Titans have not won against her yet, and never will if she has any say against it. They have wronged her. They have wronged Hestia. They have wrong Leto, Hecate, Metis, Asteria, and all the other titans who should—in all logic—not be willingly on their (the gods’) side but are there anyway. To live is to get bloody, to sink your nails in the dirt and refuse to move for anybody because why the hell would you?

Demeter is blind. Zeus loves birds. The Titans do not win. It is all a fact of life.

honestly this is so fucking real.

I love The symbolism for it and the fact that Demeter is just like "I don't give a fuck if I'm blind I will avenge my family and friends you fuckers"

I'm really curious on how her fighting style would be since she is blind now Like would you still be able to find how she used to or would you have to resort to another from a fighting.

Also you know you know service dogs. She has her two flying serpents as her service dogs since she's blind. I like that thought!

[mejomonster]

Started watching Love and Redemption, and I'm loving it!!! tho it's only ep 5. But I wanted to ask you, since you clearly love the show a lot, how bad did you think the Misunderstandings I keep hearing about going to be later? Did you find them affecting your enjoyment of the show at any point?

WOOH I LOVE THIS SHOW

I generally hate misunderstandings. I did not find the one big one even a little annoying in this show. However for some people, I think that was their biggest sore spot when watching.

For me, the misunderstanding felt largely created by people controlling/manipulating/using xuanji and sifeng for their own purpose (and in xuanjis case that's a huge theme of bigger stuff). And (spoiler) they go talk to each other and fix the misunderstanding rather quickly (which is honestly good enough for me... go TALK about it lol, yet in so many shows that doesn't occur to them). So the misunderstanding didn't bother me at all.

So yeah, there's about 1 major relationship misunderstanding and given the situations around the characters it overall made sense to me, and as soon as they can get a moment to Go Meet it's cleared up. (Perhaps because LaR does so much that's handled in a way I prefeel Compared to other shows of this kind, the few writing choices that are miscommunication stand out more? But then to each their own my opinion is different than another's and all have fair reasons).

If you tolerated (or actually liked) Eternal Love (i hate watched it to be frank... inconsistent and agony enjoying writing drove me up a wall i was so angry but objectively i think that show did have some Great qualities as well so i get why it was liked by a lot of ppl), then I doubt anything in LaR is going to hit you as frustrating. If you tolerated (or liked) Ashes of Love then the writing in LaR is so far away from that level of misunderstanding its a different planet (I couldn't do ashes of love at all but I liked the actor performances).

There's also some "xuanji doesn't have all information" throughout the show. But from sifeng, that's character important (you'll find out by around ep 20 when this shows script starts becoming Wildly different than most other romance three lives xianxia in some core ways). And from Bai lin... he's the *redacted*. I can't tell you more without spoiling. Basically let's say... there's manipulators at play and xuanjis arc has a lot to do with abuse and manipulation and being treated as an object tool symbol rather than a person (one could argue sifeng and many other lead characters deal with degrees of this), and xuanji healing and overcoming that is major. So like... in a way that kind of writing could be frustrating (it's frustrating to see xuanji lied to and manipulated) but thats part of the core themes and story, and not something between her and her love interest.

(Also I could go ON about how LaR is more like Good Omens rather than Supernatural in its choice to paint emotional strength as more world Helping than physical strength in fights, which I just liked as a choice because again oh... what I would've given for someone to address the abusers in Eternal Love a bit more like the stupid Heavenly Emperor but whatever)

I can't remember the exact episode but once sifeng's revealed a bit more. Around ep 20ish? The show starts more blatantly revealing its themes and how the reality of its particular xianxia setup and approach is so different than other shows like Eternal Love and the critiques and subversion at play. It's already in glimpses earlier on, like Xuanji being god of war (usually its the guy Love interest who's God of war in these not the heroine), the demon fox woman not being entirely evil (and several early "catch demon" arcs that are rather sympathetic and more like Guardians "they're just people" than one mightve expected), the way Ling Long is going to be future leader of clan based on setup and is functionally Jiang Cheng in some ways (especially anger) and she's also kind of the main feminine character at the lead of the cast (xuanji is a bit more complex and more like the Overall Lead because she's serving a lot more roles in plot/tropes flipped and subverted), and Ling Long being so aggressive so bossy so nuch like a lot of heros (rather than heroines) in similar shows, the way sifengs mask and rules around it sort of connect to protecting virginity purity avoiding Love and those themes (normally not played with for the hero but heroine), the way as sifengs arc opens more (around ep 20) it becomes clear he'd normally be the "second guy lead who suffers and doesn't get the romance or happiness at end" but I promise he is the main lead and will be happy with xuanji, the way the other romantic lead is actually the *redacted* and they actually made the *redacted* painted as *redacted* for things he does. The way as sifengs arc opens the cultivation groups show they're willing to scapegoat and harm innocents and that throws SO many of their decisions past and future into the new framework of knowing these "righteous" leaders may choose to and will choose to hurt innocent people. Which throws in the bigger point. IN the theme song of the show. That these lead characters, heroes, will have to decide right and wrong for themselves, they won't let fate decide and won't find the right path in following the route laid out for them and expected of them by those in power.

Anyway tldr. I didn't find the miscommunication a big irritation. I felt it was written fine. Could it have been written better? Maybe. If you've watched any other romance three lives xianxia and liked or simply Finished watching it, then LaR should be a fair bit less misunderstanding lol. There's only 1 big misunderstanding I remember in LaR and i found it understandable and quickly resolved by talking like it should be lol. However I do think* the way the villain manipulates xuanji can be absolutely brutal to watch (and as that trauma is part of her story arc it's unavoidable) so that may eventually be something some people wanna avoid. I liked it becayse it was well written and a meaningful story to me and she overcomes it. But it's definitely a bit component.

[leviackermanscleaningbuddy]

Slides this to u

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8MXgAtD/

Runs away

Wait. Get back here.

BRING YOUR ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW

[avvidstarion]

new tav they're a tempest domain cleric of talos and i can't choose between two names. do they look more like a torrent or a cataclysm to you? right now they are cataclysm but i can always change it. My thought process for each name is in the tags

[time-is-restored]

73 yards thoughts

now that ive had a night to sleep on it, and read everyone's thoughts, im rewatching the episode to see if i can come to a more definite opinion about the episode (though that's perhaps against the spirit of the thing, lol!)

so a few moments that stood out for me that i don't think have already been talked about a lot:

when mrs twist shows up on the mountain, and ruby is giving her messages to pass along to the woman, she wants to say sorry. when mrs twist asks 'what for?' ruby looks genuinely thrown + upset, and eventually says '...i don't know.' since the woman/curse that haunts ruby is functionally an externalisation of ruby's deep seated sense that there is something fundamentally wrong with her, i think this interaction was super poignant. ruby 'knows' that she's done something that she needs to apologise for in the same way that she 'knows' there is something wrong with her that will make people react with fear + anger. there's no proof, no clear flaw or mistake that she can point to, because that's the point. the woman isn't saying anything specific -- there's nothing to say. noticing her (noticing a part of ruby that has a perception filter on it -- that is hard to see until you get close) just means that you see in ruby what ruby sees in herself. she is afraid that people will 'discover' whatever is wrong with her, and she'll lose them forever.

relevant to this is the fact that ruby didn't actually break the circle. if reading the messages is what summoned the woman in universe, then sure, she has culpability for that. but if it was breaking the circle, she had to live with the consequences of someone else's actions, and feeling guilt for something she didn't do. while im less confident with this reading, you could argue this is an allegory for her being given away. ultimately, that decision had nothing to do with her. she was literally a baby lmao. the idea that there's something wrong with her bc of her mother's decision is illogical -- doesn't follow reality, just like magic. she's spending her life trying to make up for a mistake she hasn't made (and, honestly, probably wasn't made. we don't know anything about her birth mother -- its more than likely that she wasn't fit to be a parent to ruby, no matter how human or supernatural the reasons for that were. but the facts of the situation don't matter here, in this liminal space. guilt and fear and shame bleed through the gaps. ruby could arguably be 'the spiteful one' the pub laugh about. she thinks she needs to be punished for something, and so the woman punishes her.)

following along this line, we know that ruby genuinely doesn't know what might have caused the woman to appear. she suggests trespassing, or breaking the circle, and gets the idea that reading the notes might have been wrong from the pub, but she never finds out for sure. unit doesn't know, or at least doesn't have the chance to tell her. the lack of closure ties in really well -- ruby has to carry a trauma that, even as she comes to terms with it, she can never truly explain or understand. even the partial amnesia at the end of the episode can be read as a sort of 'the body remembers what the mind forgets'. some part of her knows something terrible has happened, something that scarred her and left her alone for an immense amount of time (even if that time, in a literal sense, was undone), but she won't be able to put words to it. it seems that self acceptance - literally opening her arms to this *thing* that has haunted her her whole life,

now for some more rambly thoughts/things im still confused about

i genuinely think if not for the single shot of the episode reversing and old ruby now standing with her arms out on the cliff, i would have no problems with the themes of this episode. it was a powerful representation of rejection and fear that genuinely freaked me out (ruby running after her stone-faced mother while crying BROKE me), and i think it was a great character study of ruby. like others have said -- how many people would have stuck it out for that long? how many people would have never resented/blamed the doctor (or anyone, really) for leaving? and how many of THEM would've come to find a sense of companionship with their spectre?. ...however.

i can not wrap my head around the shot where time reverses and old ruby is looking out from the pov of the woman. it completely breaks my brain. i know at a certain point i should just accept that the woman can do whatever the story needs her to do, but there was nothing about time travel up to that point. it was all about physical and psychological boundaries. more than that, there was no indication that ruby was trying to make up for what had gone wrong. she didn't try and fix the circle, she didn't try and communicate with the woman at all beyond her first failed apology. on its own, i like this -- ruby becomes resentful of the woman quite quickly, which tracks as an expression of her poor self esteem. why would she try and get in the good graces of someone she rejects + dislikes? and again, i LIKE that she eventually treats her as a companion. all ruby has is herself, and she can never leave herself. getting to a point where she doesn't want the woman to go away, where she doesn't feel lonely while alone -- it makes sense that that is what heals the riff. i can write all that out in a way that makes sense to me. ruby makes a mistake (or witnesses a mistake) that makes the doctor disappear. she rejects herself, and in this liminal space, the part that she rejects manifests into reality. it haunts her for the rest of her life, even as she begins to wield what she thinks it says about her (that she's unloveable) to her advantage. when she accepts it, and integrates it back into herself, she is able to speak clearly to herself -- what she is thinking makes it across to young!ruby. when ruby thinks about the situation without the influence of self hate, she realises that the problem was the doctor's actions, not her own. she gets the message across, the doctor doesn't disappear, and the cycle never starts. the loop closes.

but. she wasn't one with the woman the whole time! if she was, the doctor would have never stepped on the circle -- the loop couldn't start, and so it wouldn't need to be closed. like, i know that we do a lot of paradoxes in this show and sometimes things are just gonna be Weird. but to me it's like if, in turn left, donna died in an unrelated car crash, then ended up back in time anyway. so why, if ruby has apparently accepted the woman by the time she visits the tardis for the last time, does the show bother with taking us back to the hospital and seeing old!ruby flatline? why doesn't the old woman come to her there, in that moment, so old!ruby is reaching across time but not space? if i squint, i could make an argument for the death. ruby's understanding of herself dies so a new, more accepting one can be born -- and obviously the timeline would fade away in the moment the loop is closed. but that's not what happens. old!ruby chooses hope and accepts herself, THEN goes back to the hospital, dies, then travels back to the past through time AND space (somehow, sure, i'll just accept the woman can do that), then communicates the message, then fades away. what changed between the visit to the tardis and her death? what do those few minutes possibly add other than the 'ive never been alone' line, which could've easily been written into the talk on the cliff? hell, she could've passed away right there on the cliff, if that needed to happen! but no matter how i twist it i can't understand why the old woman looked the same as it did before old!ruby merged with her, behaved + moved the same, and physically manifested when none of the criteria for its appearance had yet been met. im almost certainly overthinking it -- i can map everything else from this episode onto a psychological exploration of ruby and her fear. maybe the episode is saying that the woman was always there (at least to ruby), and old!ruby's self acceptance is what let the message get through??? but fuck i hate that she looks the same!!!! aghghhhghg! what changed! what changed! it looks like nothing changeddddd!!!!! <- deranged. they merged, there should be a sign of that beyond her hands being mirrored with ruby's.

tldr. if i could change anything about the ending of the episode, i'd take it in one of two ways. either have ruby merge with the woman while on the cliff and have ruby say something like 'now, what were you (or i) trying to tell me?' before cutting to the new timeline, or have the woman post merge look like old (or young!) ruby. she couldn't be seen because she was unknowable and (bc of ruby's schema) unloveable, so ruby conjured a generic older woman (possibly drawing from mother issues -- had to be someone at minimum old enough to be her bio mum). if she now looked like something specific, wouldn't that show old!ruby knew that what she feared was all bc she rejected herself? young!ruby could even have a line to go along with 'she looked like she was looking for someone', maybe 'i wanted to talk to her' -- just something small indicating that old!ruby's acceptance of herself was passed down in some small way, even if it certainly hasn't cured ruby of anything.

now for other theme/focus mutterings. i could spin something here about the fact that the doctor says the fairy circle 'is' charms and spells and hopes and dreams. ruby hopes and dreams that she can be accepted, and later, that she can bring the doctor back/undo the moment where it all went wrong. but the doctor also says that they should 'rest in piece'. so they're dead hopes and dreams, aka fears + regrets? so breaking it unleashed both the doctor and her greatest fears - the doctor of complete helplessness + impotence, and ruby of abandonment + rejection. because those fears stay buried in this timeline, ruby + the doctor's hopes (which in many ways are embodied in each other) can continue to live and be 'here', not drowned in the past.

also, the doctor implies the woman is 'resting in piece', out of nowhere, which i think is another indication of both ruby AND the doctor having knowledge from the split timeline. after all, old!ruby did die. so did the timeline where all that happened, i suppose. maybe that's the other angle for the fairy circle - it represents the fragility of a load bearing timeline. the hundreds of dead paradoxes and dead universes that spin off from time being written and unwritten as the doctor (and his companions) fixes whatever he can. let them rest in piece. forget what could've happened. forget what just did happen.

now for my other critique. i think the sexual harassment sub plot was cheap and shitty, and only served to be an incredibly lazy 'kick the puppy' moment to show that the prime minister was Evil™ levels of bad. in the process it showed no respect or care to victims of abuse, and pretty heavily implied that ruby had done nothing in the face of her peer being abused, because 'she had to make sure'. of what? that mad jack was a bad guy? watching him heavily imply he wanted to fire nukes wasn't enough to confirm anything? 'he's a monster' wasn't enough? why? what metric was she using, then? if she was waiting for him to be prime minister, why did she wait an unspecified amount of time AFTER he was elected, where he's clearly still abusing marti, to act? presumably the audience was already on team 'oh this guy sucks' by the nuke interview at the VERY latest, where it was also made clear that the guy was fearmongering about borders and all sorts of right wing bullshit. like, those are just the problems with it off the top of my head -- it fucking sucks, basically.

that all being said, i think ruby convincing herself that she only has 'one chance' works super well into the overall theme of ruby's understanding of the monster + her situation being tied to arbitrary rules she's decided help make the woman make sense. since this terrible thing happened when life was previously going fine, there must be a way to undo it and go back to the love and acceptance she had before. but there is no monster to slay that will trigger the end credits. there's just ordinary, shitty humans, and ruby herself. she can't uncross the boundary of pre-and-post trauma. and as long as she thinks there is something she has to make up for, the world where she is being punished will keep ticking along. i just wish it had been communicated in a different context!!!

side note. does anyone else want to come live with me in a world where 'it never snowed again' means that snow never occured again anywhere in the world. yes its way more likely to think that ruby's referring to instances of spontaneous snow linked to her emotions. but can you IMAGINE hardening your heart so entirely after being rejected by your mother that you change the climate of planet earth?? holy shit!

[greaseonmymouth]

my brain has been offline since I woke up. apologies to my work inbox but the only thing I’m capable of today is hugging my hot water bottle and scrolling tumblr

[ddruxyart]

Hi I just wanted to let u know that I haven't stopped thinking about ur femc comic since I saw it. The colors are so good and the quote tears me apart it's sosososo good

Yo... the COMPLIMENT of this, unparalleld. IN TEARS is what I am. I know I'm only replying now, but I've been thinking about your ask the last few days and I'm still riding that high, so thank you fdfdf

more under the cut bc it turns out I always have way more to say than I think haha

That quote has been a sleeper agent inside my brain for sooo long and as I was on my 6th or smth try of beating P3 (I kept playing past the halfway point and then falling off bc of adhd), it came across my dash again and I connected the fucken dots dfdfdf. I think it was also kinda around the time when the remake leaks started to go around and I had several, uncheritable thought & onions on that. Another artwork idea that i had for when I finished the game was a still life called "Treasure" and it would've depicted all of the items you get when you complete a social link. But I'm not strong eough for that haha Obvs a very applicable quote to a lot of media but oughghgh it fits Hamuko SOO well. Narratively ofc but also in the way atlus treats her lmao. < I've never got through PQ2 myself but thinking about her in that game makes me SO sad jfc wdym you got dropped here all on your own, none of your friends remember youand also you're playing the second fiddle to some short emo guy??? < I'm going insane

uh sry about that, coming back to the topic at hand: I think I did the sketch in August of last year? and then started the rendering process in September. I had that comic pretty much finished then. EXCEPT for the third panel, which changed quite drastically. It was a lot closer to the in-game color palette of that scene before and.. it looked okay... < I'm lying, it looked sooo boring, where are my shrimp colors?? No atmosphere at all So i dropped it "for a hot sec" i.e.: whoops it's suddenly february (I wanted to have it queued for p3r's release, uh oh better fucken crunch it.) Rushing in at the last sec to finish it definitely had some pros and cons haha.

I think it turned out pretty well in the end despite it all and knowing me I probs wouldn't have picked it up again if not for that self imposed deadline lmao;;; I'm becoming a bit irked by my typestting on the second panel..

I might go back and fix it if it bother me too much.

[balconyswirls]

i recently started using the flora study app because my close friend got me into it and i got a friend request from one of my friends' sisters whom i've never talked to and she has a basil pfp from omori, and my pfp is the omori plushie (the same one i have on here currently). so i was guessing that was why she added me and i was right because minutes later she messages on one of my session results 'is that an omori pfp'. and this friend told me she had a younger sister but i had no idea how old she was so i search her name on the school database and she's in fifth grade... missy aren't you a little too young to like a game famous for being psychological horror? 😭