Chilico — PELICAN FANCLUB
English+Romaji Translation
麻の匂い 風景が赤く なんだか視界が優雅ね
asa no nioi fuukei ga akaku nandaka shikai ga yuuga ne
The smell of flower
Reddening scenery
It's an elegant view, somehow
白と黒 輪郭が崩れるから 名前を呼ぶ
shiro to kuro rinkaku ga kuzureru kara namae wo yobu
Black and white
Your silhouette falters
So I call your name
顔の糸が曖昧だ まるで君が人のようにね
kao no ito ga aimai da maru de kimi ga hito no you ni ne
The threads on your face are blurred
It almost looks like you've become a person
ソーダ水賽が投げられた 許さない
soodasui sai ga nagerareta yurusanai
The seltzer water dice have been cast
I won't give in
純粋に思うことが出来ないけれど信じていたい
junsui ni omou koto ga dekinai keredo shinjiteitai
Even though I don't truly believe, I want to
良くない欲がよくわからない
yokunai yoku ga yoku wakaranai
I really don't understand how desire can be a bad thing
終わりがない始まりもない
owari ga nai hajimari mo nai
There's no end and no beginning either
純粋に思うことが出来ないけれど信じていたい
junsui ni omou koto ga dekinai keredo shinjiteitai
Even though I don't truly believe, I want to
良くない欲がよくわからない
yokunai yoku ga yoku wakaranai
I really don't understand how desire can be a bad thing
おかしい すべてが幻みたいだ
okashii subete ga maboroshi mitai da
It's strange
Everything seems like an illusion
誰かの何かで見た
dareka no nanika de mita
I caught a glimpse through something that did not belong to me
こんな生き物だっけ
konna ikimono dakke
Was I always a being like this?
不思議そうに見ている
fushigi sou ni miteiru
Staring curiously
怪しくて気味が悪い
ayashikute kimi ga warui
An uneasy ominous feeling
誰かの何かで見た
dareka no nanika de mita
I caught a glimpse through something that did not belong to me
こんな生き物だっけ
konna ikimono dakke
Was I always a being like this?
不思議そうに見ている
fushigi sou ni miteiru
Staring back curiously
怪しくて気味が悪い
ayashikute kimi ga warui
An uneasy ominous feeling
純粋に思うことが出来ないけれど信じていたい
junsui ni omou koto ga dekinai keredo shinjiteitai
Even though I don't truly believe, I want to
良くない欲がよくわからない
yokunai yoku ga yoku wakaranai
I really don't understand how desire can be a bad thing
終わりがない始まりもない
owari ga nai hajimaru mo nai
There's no end and no beginning either
純粋に思うことが出来ないけれど信じていたい
junsui ni omou koto ga dekinai keredo shinjiteitai
Even though I don't truly believe, I want to
良くない欲がよくわからない
yokunai yoku ga yoku wakaranai
I really don't understand how desire can be a bad thing
おかしい すべてが幻みたいだ
okashii subete ga maboroshi mitai da
It's strange
Everything seems like an illusion
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Okay if you haven't yet, and you have Netflix/Paramount+, consider giving "School Spirits" a chance.
It looks like a silly little cheesy teenage ghosts show, I put it on for background noise, and then got totally engrossed in the mystery. It's VERY well written, very well filmed, the mystery was GREAT and the payoff at the end is also great.
One of the things majorly lacking in shows I've recently tried to watch is that they try to do a twist/reveal at the end that comes out of nowhere. They don't want you to guess what they're doing. This show doesn't do that. This show wants you to guess. They give you seven different mysteries and enough clues to guess (most of) what is going on, so that when you get the final puzzle piece to any given mystery, it feels GREAT.
The story premise is this: a teenager in hs wakes up as a ghost in the hs, and doesn't remember how she died, and with the help of the other ghosts, tries to solve the mystery of her own death.
Simple premise. BEAUTIFULLY executed. Not all of the questions that arise get answered, but the main one (what she doesn't remember) gets solved by the end of the season, leaving the "why/how and what comes next" to be carried to the next season. It does a cliffhanger RIGHT. But now I desperately want to see the second season (which I believe has been approved, so it's a matter of waiting).
So pretty please, if you're looking for something to do and a great, engaging lil mystery to watch, consider! School Spirits!!
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one of the things about having an unstable parent is that it can so easily ruin your future. you want to get out, but getting out takes having agency. it takes the resume and the grades and the stellar community service history.
but you have to choose your battles. you know if you sign up for an after-school activity, it'll be okay for a while, so long as the activity is parent-approved and god-fearing. over time, like all things, it will become an argument (i can't keep carting your ass to these things) or a weapon (talk to me like that again, see if you get to go to practice). sometimes, if you love the thing, it's worth it. but you also know better than to love something: that's how they get you. if you ever actually want something, it will always be the center of their attention. they will never stop threatening you with it. telling you of course i'm a good parent, i came to all of those stupid events.
you learn to balance yourself perfectly. you can either have a social life or you can have hobbies. both of these things will be under constant scrutiny. you spend too much time with her, you should be at home with family is equally paired with you're acting like this because you're addicted to what's on that goddamn screen. you cannot ever actually win, so everything falls within a barter system that you calculate before entering: do you want to learn how to drive? if so, you'll need to give up asking for a new laptop, even though yours died. maybe you can work on a computer at the library. of course, that would mean you'd be allowed to go to the library, which would mean something else has to bleed. nothing ever actually comes free.
and that bitter, horrible irony: you could be literally following their orders and it still isn't pretty. they tell you to get a job; they hate that your job keeps you late and gives you access to actual money. they tell you to do better in school; they say no child of mine needs a tutor. they want you to stop being so morose, don't you know there are people who are really suffering - but they revile the idea you might actually need therapy.
you didn't survive that fall the way other people would. you've seen other people scramble and get their way out, however they could. maybe you were made too-soft: the answer didn't come to you easily. it wasn't quick. it was brutal and nasty. some people even asked you why didn't you just work hard and escape during school? and you felt your head spinning. why didn't you? (they control your financial aid. they control your loan status. they love having that kind of thing). maybe in another life you got diagnosed sooner and got the meds you needed to actually focus and got attention from the right teachers who helped you clear hurdles to get up out of here - but for now? here?
the effort of trying. the effort of not-dying. that kind of effort was absolutely agonizing.
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