#red bellied rat snake

[mrghostrat]

As an American I’m kind of loving the aussi stuff. I avoid reading fics where they go to America(just doesn’t feel right), but somehow Australia makes sense to me? Although I feel like both would be scared of the big ass spiders and bugs lol

omg NOOOO aziraphale loves all of god's creatures. he'd laugh when the huntsmans startle him and somehow befriend a cassowary. he'd put bird feed out for the rosellas but maybe a little too much and end up with emus at his kitchen window.

crowley would roll with the local snakes, like a venomous biker gang

[sserpente]

A/N: What if you accidentally pickpocket the wrong person? What if that person… is a rogue vampire elf who will demand something in return? Something… red? (Astarion's not ascended in this one)

Words: 1180 Warnings: mentions of prostitution

Your stomach was rumbling. How many days had it been? Three? Four? Truly, it had never been this bad before. Ever since Gortash had become archduke, the city was drowning in chaos and misery. Benevolent and generous people who’d usually slip you a coin or two walked on now, avoiding your quiet pleas to spare some change for a starving woman.

You didn’t want to do it but what other choice did you have but to pickpocket people? In the dead of winter, merchants rarely left their food out for too long and the taverns were not busy enough to slip your hand into a bag or two.

The streets were your best bet now that the sun was retreating and lit torches threw their warm light on the cobblestones, creating eerie shadows wherever you looked. Your victim would have to be someone rich, someone who could afford to part with currency. Someone like… him. Heavens, he was gorgeous.

A noble, for sure. He was elegant. Full white hair, pointy ears indicating he was a high elf, no doubt… clean and sophisticated clothing. Surely his pockets would be full and he wouldn’t miss a couple of gold coins disappearing to fill your belly with food tonight.

You approached, snaking past a passer-by to wait for the right moment. The elf turned… giving you just enough movement to dip your fingers into the small pouch attached to his belt. One, two, three, four… five gold pieces should be enough to buy yourself a warm meal tonight and perhaps some bread to feed you for the days to come.

“Why, you insolent little…” Panic washed over you when he spoke with a start. The elf’s gaze met yours as he flipped around—red orbs boring into your own, anger flickering in his. His hand snatched your wrist in a tight grip before you could yank it back and flee.

“You have picked the wrong target, darling.”

“I’m sorry… s-sorry, don’t… don’t tell the Steel Watch, please! I’ll leave.”

But it was a different kind of hazard this stunningly beautiful elf was radiating. Red-eyed elves were rare in itself but there was something else—something that told you that you had just made a very grave mistake in provoking this particular stranger before you.

“The Steel Watch?” The elf laughed. “I have no interest in reporting you to the Steel Watch. But in all honesty… you could help me out with something else.”

He was charming—more than you would have liked to admit. There was a sweet tone of seduction in his voice that went down like honey, so much so that you almost wanted to agree with him. But if there was one thing you had sworn to yourself, it was that you would never sell your body to ensure your survival.

“I… no. I don’t do… that.”

“What?” Anger appeared on the elf’s face. No, you realised… it was actual appalment. “I didn’t mean… I am talking about your blood, dear. You smell delicious.”

The thought of him being a vicious murderer on the hunt for the next thrill crossed your mind like a slap in the face—but your theory was rapidly disproved when he flashed you a disarming smile. Fangs. He was a vampire.

Your eyes widened, fear now fuelling your body more than the adrenaline ever could. You twisted your wrist, desperate to break free from him. But the relentless hunger had made you weak.

“Now, now, darling, no need to be scared. I am very, very… nice,” he said slowly, purring each and every word.

Dragging you after him before you could utter another word of protest, he slipped into the shadows and a dark side alley. A rat fled as you stumbled against the wall, abandoning the rotten carrot it had been gnawing on.

“I told you, I’m sorry. Please… don’t kill me,” you breathed out.

“Kill you? I’m not going to kill you. I just need a little taste. I was going make do with a drunk tonight but this… this is much better.”

He sighed when you squirmed, resulting in his large body pressing you even further against the brick wall. Your dirty dress scraped against the rough material. You lifted your head, biting your lower lip.

“How about this? You let me have a little nibble and in exchange, I’ll let you have the gold pieces you were going to steal from me. I’m not much for charity but I can work with a little… transaction.”

He would… was he serious? You blinked at him, surprised at yourself for even considering his words. If you accepted, would this truly be any different from selling your body in more intimate ways?

“I promise I’ll be gentle. You won’t feel a thing.”

“You know, most vampires would have ripped my throat out already,” you said. Your voice was a little shaky but you stood your ground. You had no choice, after all.

The stranger smiled. “I’m not most vampires, darling. Besides, I’m only a spawn, so you should consider yourself lucky. So? What do you say to my little proposition?”

“I…” Your stomach growled again, making the decision for you. “F-fine.”

“Excellent. My name is Astarion.”

You told him your name with a stutter following his seductive smile. Each and every muscle in your body tensed when he leaned forward, brushing your hair out of the way to reveal your neck to him.

One moment you could feel his hot breath against your skin, in the next you felt his sharp canines breaking it to draw blood. He’d held his promise. The initial pain subsided so fast that you questioned whether it’d been there to begin with. His mouth closed around the wound he caused, sucking your life essence out of you sip after sip after sip.

It felt… good. You’d expected it to be uncomfortable, to be dancing on the edge of unconsciousness or even death but this… perhaps he’d been just as hungry as you. Perhaps he’d been just as desperate as you. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps…

Your eyes fell shut as you gave in to the soothing sensation. Astarion moaned against your neck, a wordless sound of approval of your taste. You couldn’t help but feel flattered when he finally pulled away and licked his lips, a small trickle of blood staining the right corner of his mouth.

“Hmm… thank you, darling. That was…”

“Astarion! Astarion! Where the hells did he run off to now? I swear if he’s stealing scrolls from Rolan again, I will…”

The vampire rolled his eyes all the while you kept catching your breath from this unusual and strangely… erotic experience.

“I’m coming, Gale. Gods, the man is a nuisance.” He paused. “I shall hope to see you again, darling. You were delightful.”

Astarion slipped away gracefully, leaving you to sink down against the wall but before he did, he gently placed the entire gold pouch he’d been carrying in your palm with a sly smile.

Against all reason… you were hoping to see him again too.

[scrunckled-idiot]

What’s your favorite animal?🦔

oooooh fuck uh... mmhhh... cant decide :(. but i like deez ones!

pigeons. especialy white ones. (i wonder why)

rats/mice

fishys :)

snakes. either hog noses or ball pythons

frogs. red eyed tree frogs are neat and those fat green frogs with the white bellies that i forgor the name of :(

dragons, if they were real *dramatic sigh*

kiggys

dogs :) big, small, whatever. especially the retarded looking apple head chihuahua with the bug eyes and look like they have every deizes known to man lol.

[omg-snakes]

Hey, I was wondering if you could identify the morph of my cornsnake? I bought her as an ultramel motley before I knew anything about snakes, but she doesn't match the description of the morph I've seen. Her belly lacks the checkerboard pattern completely, and instead is white that fades to yellow/orange lower on her body.

Hello and what a lovely lady!

Thank you for sharing her. I think she is an Ultramel Motley from what I can see here, and a very pretty one at that!

It sounds like the description you found may have discussed Ultramel but not Motley.

For those who aren't familiar with the morph, Ultramel is a combination of Ultra and Amel, which are allelic. An allele is a specific spot on a DNA molecule where a certain gene sits, and the term allelic means two genes that do different things but occupy the same allele. Ultra is a gene introduced by breeding corn snakes with grey rat snakes, and it results in hypomelanism and some yellow/red pigment enhancement. Amel is a total lack of melanism (duh). Since these two genes sit in the same spot on the DNA molecule in corn snakes, they can mix and match to create an Amel snake, an Ultra snake, or an Ultramel with some features of both morphs: heavily reduced melanism to where it's nearly completely removed, enhanced red/orange pigments.

Motley is a pattern-altering gene, and it causes the blotches on a snake to be concentrated along the spine with reduced or absent patterning along the sides, and absent belly checkers. A high-quality Motley snake will have a solid white tummy with no checkers, usually with some red/orange color bleed towards the back half as they get older. Motley is another allelic gene, but its possible allele cohabitant is the Stripe gene!

Anyways she's gorgeous and looks very healthy and loved. Please give her a gentle pat for me.

[pomellon]

Hi! I've been watching a lot of snake videos recently, and your scholar dragons remind me a lot of scaleless rat-snakes:

I love your saurian AUs, so I was wondering: are scholars completely "naked", or do they have a few random scales like rl scaleless snakes do? Also how could humans think they're ugly, your dragons are all adorable (I love the way you draw toe-beans >.<).

Oh my gosh yes I love snakes! And the scholar class dragons are actually based on scaleless snakes :D

They can be completely naked, but it's pretty common for them to have a few scales down their backs, on their faces, knees and elbows, and hands and feet. In some cases they might even have full belly scales, but often thinner and softer than the scales on other classes. Also very common for them to have a few randomly ones scattered over their bodies and I usually draw these as little spots or flecks, often a little darker or brighter than their base colour.

For example, in Ze's case these would be the darker red flecks, and for Hytham it's the brighter blue spots:

And I completely agree, humans in the saurian world are so mean thinking they're ugly :c They're just soft squishy lil guys who just like to be cozy and safe! (Which is kind of funny because both of the above examples very much go against being "safe" XD)

[torchickentacos]

CRITTER MASTERPOST! LONG! SNAKES AND BUGS ETC WARNING! LITERALLY JUST PICTURES OF CRITTERS I'VE FOUND ok to rb <3

Worm snake!

Mouse I caught in a tupperware container!

Possum!

TWO garter snakes! They were fucking where my dad was trying to rake. I had to break it up unfortunately.

Really pretty pigeon I caught! With my hands! In the air! Because he flew into my window and was dazed!

Swallowtail caterpillar!

Skink on a bucket!

Toad that guards our front door!

Weird deer! she was fine, just a funny picture. She's good though

Rat snake I caught when my friends came over! he bit me.

Unidentified bird! He was fine, just a little shaken up. Mom reached out to people about him and they said to just release and that he was old enough to live on his own.

Red-backed salamander!

Red-bellied snake!

Dekays snake!

Toad! Flat Fuck Friday!

Mole kingsnake!

Hard to tell, but TWO dekay's snakes! No, I don't know why my finger is blue, probably from art class, this was taken in high school.

Rat snake!

Fox kit, sorry about the iphone, uh, 3?? quality. middle school me did her best.

Much better quality bumblebee!

goose. I can probably stop identifying animals now.

More foxes! Mom and an adolescent.

Duck. Don't approach wildlife, by the way, I was like uhhhh fifteen.

And the polyphemus moth from earlier!

[ultfan]

aesthetic.

what are your muse’s aesthetics? BOLD any which apply to your muse! remember to REPOST! feel free to add to the list!

[ COLOURS ]  ~  burgundy. red. crimson. scarlet. maroon. mahogany. copper. amber. chocolate. brown. tawny. tan. bronze. brass. orange. gold. saffron. yellow. chartreuse. spring green. lime. mint. green. olive. forest. turquoise. teal. cerulean. blue. navy. cobalt. periwinkle. indigo. pewter. plum. purple. magenta. fuchsia. lilac. lavender. pink. coral. peach. ivory. cream. white. silver. grey. smoke. charcoal. ebony. black. pastels. vibrant. matte. metallic. muted. dark. light.

[ BODY ] ~ mutations. claws. fangs. wings. tails. feathers. webs. spikes. scales. fur. stripes. spots. freckles. acne. bruises. scars. scratches. gashes. lashes. wounds. amputations. burns. brands. teeth. gums. tongues. lips. beards. mustaches. cheeks. noses. ears. eyes. eyelashes. eyebrows. hair. heads. neck. shoulders. collar bones. arms. elbows. wrists.  hands. fingers. breast. back. ribs. abs. belly. hips. curves. butts. legs. thighs. knees. shins. ankles. feet. toes. nails. sweat. spit. tears. blood. heart. stomach. lungs. liver. veins.  guts. bones. spine. muscle. skin. feline. canine. masculine. feminine.

[ WEAPONS ]  ~  bites. fists. sword. dagger. spear. arrow. bow. crossbow. hammer.  shield. poison. guns. axes. throwing axes. whips. knives. throwing knives. pepper sprays. tasers.  machine guns. slingshots. katanas. maces. staffs. wands. powers. magical items. magic. rocks. mud balls. bombs. missiles. boomerangs. lethal pets. lasers.

[ MATERIALS ]  ~ metal. gold. silver. platinum. pewter. titanium. iron. steel. copper. bronze. brass. tin. bismuth. diamonds. pearls. rubies. garnets. sapphires. emeralds. jade. peridots. alexandrite. opal. topaz. jasper. quartz. rose quartz. smoky quartz. amethyst. citrine. fluorite. amber. malachite. turquoise. lapis lazuli. sodalite. pyrite. labradorite.  moonstone.  petrified wood. wood. paper. parchment. hemp. canvas. burlap. oils. skin. muslin. rayon. faux. wool. fur. lace. leather. skins. suede. corduroy. silk. satin. chiffon. velvet. denim. linen. cotton. charcoal. clay. stone. rocks. flint. asphalt. brick. granite. marble. dust. rust. glitter. sand. dirt. mud. smoke. ash. carbonate. rubber. synthetics. nylon. polyester. plastic. glass. porcelain.  bone. shells. coral.

[ NATURE ]  ~ grass. leaves. trees. bark. flowers. roses. daisies. forget me nots. tulips. lavender. petals. thorns. seeds. hay. roots. ocean. pond. river. stream. waterfall. creek. meadow. forest. desert. tundra. savanna. rain forest. tropical. jungle. marsh. moors. swamp.  plains. hills. highlands. caves. underwater. coral reef. beach. waves. space.  clouds. mountains. fire. lava. ice. frost. water. air. earth. rain. snow. wind. moon. stars. sun.  heat. cold. steam. lightning. sunlight. moonlight. dawn. dusk. twilight. midnight. sunrise.  sunset. dewdrops. shadow. tornado. hurricane. water spout. thunder. hail. twisters. humidity. dryness.

[ ANIMALS ]  ~ birds. penguins. eagles. owls. falcons. vultures. hawks. swans. parrots. parakeets. doves. pigeons. ducks. robins. cardinals. blue jays. bluebirds. blackbirds. crows. ravens. magpies. mockingbirds. flamingos. ostriches. seagulls. albatross. peacocks. condors. finches. pelicans. chickens. geese. quail. bats. sheep. cows. buffalo. deer.  hedgehogs. elephants. horses. giraffes. cats. lions. tigers. pumas. cheetahs. jaguars. foxes. dogs. wolves. coyotes. bunnies. mice. rats. monkeys. apes. bears. pandas. polar bears. snakes. iguanas. chameleons. alligators. crocodiles. turtles. lizards. frogs. toads. whales. dolphins. fish. sharks. stingrays. octopus. lobsters. crabs. bugs. spiders. ants.  moths. butterflies. flies. maggots. roaches. ladybugs. beetles. cicadas. dragonflies. fleas. termites. leeches. worms. snails. mosquitoes. werewolves. unicorns. pegasus. dragons. dinosaurs.

[ FOODS/DRINKS ]  ~  pepper. salt. sugar. honey. syrup. caramel. candy. bubblegum.  mints.  candy canes. gumdrops. lollipops. chocolate. vanilla. cinnamon. ice cream. cake. cookies. brownies. biscuits. pie. tarts. lemonade. soda. champagne. wine. brandy. rum. whiskey. vodka. tequila. sake. beer. soju. gin. crema de cacao. cocoa. latte. coffee. tea.  spices. herbs. fruit. apples. oranges. lemons. cherries. strawberries. blueberries. raspberries. cranberries. watermelons. cantaloupes. bananas. coconuts. grapes. kiwi. pomegranates. tomatoes. vegetables. potatoes. cucumbers. carrots. turnips. onions. leeks.  celery. broccoli. cabbages. lettuces. roots. nuts. white meat. red meat. raw meat. veal. pork. chicken. beef. venison. fish. lobster. oysters. pizza. ambrosia. pasta. sandwiches. soup.

[ HOBBIES ]  ~  music. piano. flute. woodwinds. whistles. drums. guitar. cello. synthesizer.  violin. lute. harp. fiddle. harmonica. trumpet. brass. singing. composing. folk.  classical. bluegrass. blues. jazz. big band. pop. country. rock. punk. metal. electronica. hip hop. reggae. ska. rap. vinyl records. cassettes. cds. soundcloud. itunes. spotify. art.  sculpting. pottery. painting. watercolour. drawing. pastels. charcoal. sketching. graffiti. printing. inking. collecting. fighting. martial arts. self-defence. boxing. fencing. sumo. wrestling. jousting. paintball. lazer tag. duelling. hunting. fishing. climbing. weight lifting. training. sports. football. football (usa). rugby. baseball. cricket. lacrosse. volleyball. basketball. tennis. badminton. skating. cycling. sailing. rowing. hiking. running. gymnastics. dancing. ice skating. hockey.  reading. writing. cooking. sewing. acting. photography. video games. horseback riding. gardening. smithing. shopping. traveling. movies. theatre. libraries. books. magazines. playing cards. poker chips. chess. dice. science.

[ STYLE ]  ~ nudism. perfume. cologne. piercings. tattoos. henna. body paint. war paint.  make up. lipstick. mascara. eyeliner. eye shadow. powder. beauty marks. blush. nail polish. lingerie. fishnet. pantie-hoes. socks. stockings. leggings. long johns. under armor. corsets. sports bras. bustles. camisoles. blouses. button ups. tunics. vests. waistcoats. leather jackets. ponchos. sweaters/jumpers. hoodies. skirts. jeans. kilts. breeches. scarfs. cravats. ascots. belts. sashes. gloves. heels. sandals. platforms. tennis shoes. penny loafers. jordans. slippers. boots. cowboy boots. rain boots. army boots. armor. justaucorps. trench coats. capes. cloaks. burqa. suits. tuxedos. kimonos. saris. sun dresses. gowns. jewelry. earrings. nose rings. lip rings. tongue piercings. belly rings. gauges. eyebrow rings. necklaces. pearl strings. leis. bracelets. bangles. cuffs. watches. friendship bracelets. rings. pendants. lockets. broaches. boutonnieres. pocket watches. cuff links. hats. crowns. circlets. flower crowns. helmets. hijabs. turbans. baseball caps. cowboy hats. brocade. doublet. gorget. bracers. masks. cowls. braces. glasses. sun glasses. eye contacts. pyjamas.

[ MISC ]  ~ balloons. bubbles. candles. battle. war. diplomacy. peace. money. power.  clocks. photos. mirrors. pets. diary. fairy lights. madness. sanity. sadness. happiness. optimism. pessimism. loneliness. family. friends. assistants. co-workers. enemies.  loyalty. smoking. drugs. kindness. love. sex. hugs. duality. sin. lust. greed. wrath. envy. sloth. gluttony. pride. virtue. chivalry. honour. piety. charity. diligence. chastity. gentleness. aggression. romance. hatred. grief. pity. success. bitterness. sorrow. joy. fear. anger. good. evil. relativity. vampirism. sapphism. life. birth. time. death. illusion. silence.

[abookishdreamer]

Character Intro: Pseudologos (Kingdom of Ichor)

Nicknames- The False God, The Dark Deceit by the people of Olympius

Father by Dolos

Sue by Elpis

Grandfather by Pheme

Age- 70 (immortal)

Location- Olympia, Olympius

Personality- He's very observant with a strong attention to the most minute of details. He's also narcissistic, highly manipulative, selfish, uneasily fooled, as well as egomaniacal. There's only a few beings he genuinely cares about. He has many girlfriends.

He has the standard abilities of a god. As the god of lies his other powers/abilities include truth sense, vocal mimicry, lie proficiency, criminology mastery, telepathy (is able to read minds), fraud inducement (can manipulate others to lie), shapeshifting (his skill is on par with Empusa), being able to create a variety of auditory, visual, & sensory illusions, as well as being able to communicate with/shapeshift into animals associated with trickery- like rats, wolves, snakes, jackals, hyenas, weasels, foxes, coyotes, monkeys, crocodiles, etc...

Pseudologos' primary abode is his cliffside mansion in the state of Olympia. The mansion is built out of adamantine glass, white marble, & black onyx. There are a lot of streakless windows and glittering chandeliers while the flooring is white marble with Imperial Gold accents. The interior design is cool, modern, & sleek with a variety of artwork, photography, and sculptural pieces with leather furniture, & metal, lucite, Imperial Gold, jade, and obsidian furniture pieces. He has a LARGE garage that houses his collection of luxurious sports cars. Pseudologos also owns a beach house on Shimmering Tail Island and an apartment at Bolt Towers, located in the Skyline neighborhood of New Olympus. He also owns a yacht called Olympian.

He has an animal companion- a dragon named Nyroxion. He's the second oldest & fourth largest dragon in all the realms, widely known as "The Black Beast." After Xuvra, Nyroxion is the most fiercest and aggressive. He's primarily covered in black scales while his belly scales & spinal plates are a dark blood red. The dragon has black horns, claws, and crests with dark red eyes & black wings with dark red wing membranes. Nyroxion is usually Pseudologos' mode of transportation. Dragon and rider have an unbreakable bond.

He's fluent in all the languages spoken in Olympius.

Members of Pseudologos' immediate family includes his younger brother Logos (god of stories), his son Dolos (god of deception & treachery), his niece Eikono (goddess of iconography & literature), his daughter-in-law Elpis (goddess of hope), and his granddaughter Pheme (goddess of fame).

His breakfast is usually prepared & cooked by his personal chef- a mountainous centaur named Montague (called Monty for short). Some of Pseudologos' favorites includes almond poppy seed belgian waffles topped with peach compote, cinnamon & cardamom crêpes topped with powdered sugar, baked florentine egg white omelets, and tropical fruit sorbets.

His favorite "snacks" are smoking cigarettes & cigars. Pseudologos treats himself with buying a few of the most expensive cigars at Ygró Veloúdo- the wine bar/premier smoking room owned by Agathodaemon (Daemon) (god of vineyards, grainfields, & luck). At 1.3 million drachmas a pop, the cigar is meticulously filled with rare tobacco sourced from the Underworld infused with a prestigious black pomegrante cognac, wrapped gracefully with a gold leaf, and is secured by a band with dazzling diamonds totaling 5 carats. He also partakes in weed & lotus dust.

He's proficient at forging signatures.

Pseudologos takes great pride in his appearance. In spite of his advanced age, he lives an active lifestyle and is in peak physical shape. His silver gray hair is neatly trimmed, his clothes expertly pressed, & his shoes perfectly polished. Pseudologos is a firm believer of quality over quantity when it comes to his belongings.

A go-to drink for him is a dirty martini. He also likes champagne, red wine, manhattans, whiskey sours, scotch on the rocks, mojitos, negronis, and vesper cocktails. A usual from The Roasted Bean is an olympian sized iced americano.

He doesn't have a close relationship with his brother. Pseudologos hates his younger brother's "greater-than-thou" attitude towards his lifestyle and firmly believes that the moniker of "Olympius' Grandpa" has gotten to Logos' head. He only sees him when there are monthly family dinners hosted by Elpis.

The accumulation of Pseudologos' wealth is one of the best kept secrets in all the realms. There are whispers about his dealings in the black market, but nothing definitive.

His favorite frozen treats are rum raisin ice cream & champagne sorbet.

He has his own crew of stringers that gather intel and photos for the paparazzi. For fun it's rumored that Pseudologos will be in a shapeshifted form as a maintenance worker at the royal palace on Mt. Olympus to gather more information- which is then given to The Oracle Scoop, the tabloid magazine owned by Pheme.

Pseudologos has a few tattoos- a small dagger on the inside of his left wrist, the saying "trust no one" written in Old Greek on the inside of his right wrist, a black widow on his chest, and a bunch of nightshade flowers on his left thigh.

He quite likes his daughter-in-law Elpis. When she visits him, she always brings in a fresh bouquet of flowers. They'll go to the beach to surf & afterwards Pseudologos will enjoy Elpis' homemade smoothie bowl, the blueberry açaí one being his favorite. He doesn't mind the jokes she makes at his expense and thinks that she is too good for his son.

For lunch Monty will prepare Pseudologos' favorite- grilled snapper and asparagus with herb-caper vinaigrette. If he's with a date, he'll dine out, often at The Crown. From the menu he likes the steamed miso custard with mushrooms & soy dressing, herb crêpes with olives and spinach, & grilled garlic crusted oysters with beluga caviar.

Pseudologos' relationship with his son has always been tense. He honestly can't remember the last time he said "I love you" to Dolos or showed any sort of physical affection towards him. Pseudologos is proud of the fact that he taught his son about the harsh truths of the world. That for deities like them, their worth is made, not given. He also refuses to tell Dolos anything about his biological mother.

His all time favorite dessert is baked alaska.

Pseudologos loves buying gifts for his girlfriends, daughter-in-law, & granddaughter.

He has recently released his signature cologne called Mystique. The spicy fragrance has notes of violet leaf, cyclamen, amber, bitter orange blossom, orris, & narcissus. Another notable feature is the black obsidian bottle with purple jade accents. A 8.5 oz/250ml bottle sells for 1,300 drachmas. The release day for Mystique happened at a Pithos Department Store in the Skyline neighborhood.

Pseudologos adores his granddaughter- calling Pheme "My little diamond." They keep in touch through text all the time and they visit each other often. He was one of the financial backers involved in starting up her Diamond Ave. fashion brand. When they spend time together they'll go to the spa, go shopping, & dine at a restaurant. At times their relationship has been tested- due to Pseudologos' constant flirting with Pheme's friends. Lately, he's been trying to let up on that.

A guilty pleasure for him is a wagyu, foie gras, & black truffle burger that Monty makes.

He has quite the social media presence on Fatestagram.

Throughout his immortal life he's been married well over a hundred times! In the pantheon Pseudologos is infamously known as "The Collector of Wives." He's been engaged even more times. Pseudologos rejects the notion of true love, but understands the want and desire to have a warm body close to him at night. Now, he keeps things casual with many girlfriends of many creeds. His long-time girlfriend is Lycana (Titaness of lycanthropy).

Pseudologos has also propositioned Aisa (goddess of lot & fate) as well as Apate (goddess of fraud & deception). Aisa rejected the offer while Apate hasn't given him an answer yet. He does feel a little guilty about the latter- seeing how Apate is his friend's daughter and that she used to work closely with Dolos.

In the pantheon he's friends with Erebus (god of darkness), Astrape (goddess of lightning), Empusa (goddess of shapeshifting), Bronte (goddess of thunder), Hysminai (goddess of fighting & combat), Kydoimos (god of uproar & battlefield confusion), Clymene (Titaness of fame & renown), and Hyperion (Titan god of heavenly light). Pseudologos was the official mentor to Aplistos (god of avarice).

He met Lycana's daughter Lykos (goddess of wolves) briefly a few weeks ago. Pseudologos doesn't have much of an opinion about her.

His carnal appetites rivals that of Zeus (god of the sky, thunder, & lightning). Pseudologos has a "little black book" filled with the names of all his conquests. He has slept with Empusa a few times and has even slept with Gaia (goddess of the earth). An upcoming "event" Pseudologos is looking forward to is a video he's shooting with Philotes (goddess of sex, friendship, & affection) for her adult website. He and Lycana got into a HUGE argument about it.

He broke his only cardinal rule when he said "I love you" to Lycana while they were having sex. When she tried bringing it up a few days later, Pseudologos said that he was high on lotus dust when it happened.

In his free time he enjoys lovemaking, golf, watching TV, tennis, sunbathing, clubbing, going to the casino, playing dominoes, going to the cinema, sky diving, billiards, poker, and going to the opera.

His favorite meal is lamb ravioli with champagne butter and sage.

"The perfect lie is the one that no one suspects."

[truedarkhunter]

A look at Snake's snakes

I noticed there were more up-close looks at some of Snake's ophidian friends. So I took a few moments to stare at them and try to determine the species. Some are very likely, others are best guesses, but it's still a fun exercise. I started with the notes online with the kuro fan-site then expanded them.

Johnathan is a rattlesnake (called the “Old Man” by the others.) Likely a Western diamondback given the ridge over the eye.

Emily:  Kingsnake (false coral snake)  She has the red touching black, so false-attack.  The bands are wider than on Milk Snakes. Bronte:  Looks to be about 2 feet long and has a pale body and dark spots.  Belly is pale.  Guesses:  Could be a hognose snake, a night snake, or a variety of brown snake.

Donne:  Very small snake.  Can subtly reside at the top of Snake’s ear when travelling (Guess:  Common Krait aka “Karait”– the small, but deadly brown snake from Rikki Tikki Tavi.)

Goethe:  Orange snake, white spots, round eyes.  Childish and friendly (My guess:  Leukistic boa or python)

Keats:  Depicted both with a pattern on his back and as an non-patterned snake.  Often used as a guide.  (Sheds often?)              (Guess:  Ball Python or other python based on uneven loops of the pattern drawn and the thickness of the tail tip.)

Oscar:  Shiny two-toned green snake with a dark back, lighter stomach.  Tip of his tail is dull grey.  Tongue is blue.  Oscar has a rough temperament and speaks like a young man.  (Guess:  Red-tailed green rat snake. It has both the blue tongue and sometimes has gray tails.)

Webster:  Zig-zagged, cross-banded pattern, 4-5 markings atop head, slit pupiled eye.  From Queimada Island (Snake Island, home of the Golden Lancet/Golden Lancehead Pit Viper.)  His poison can kill a human within 30 seconds.  (Guess:  Golden Lancet. It’s the only place they live.  Webster is just a strongly patterned one.)

Wilde:  Black-and-brown spotted python, largest of Snake’s snakes.  Widest part of his body measures between 4.72” (12cm) and 5.12”(13cm) and his head is relatively small in relation to his body.  (Guess:  Boa Constrictor based on loose loopy pattern.) Head small in relation to body only the size of a small fist. 

Wordsworth:  Dark brown snake with lighter brown and black crossbands.  Has straight belly bands.  Speaks like an old man and is quite knowledgeable.  (Guess:  Eastern Copperhead.  This snake is not that dark on the body, the markings are a strongly open diamond shape and the head is strongly colored.  However, there is a clear band over the nose and past the eye that isn’t present on the copperhead.  Tail is thick.  Could be another constrictor.) Unnamed:  Black Mamba killed by Patrick Phelps in Book of Murder.  It’s highly venomous, from Southern Africa. 

                     Victims die within an hour of being bitten.  Black mambas are the fastest land snakes in the world and                      excellent tree climbers.

[snakeswagbracket]

Snake Swag Round 1A

Here come the corn snakes! Corn snakes (Pantherophis guttatus) are a species of rat snake found in the Southeastern US, particularly in Florida. They are hugely popular in the reptile pet trade because of their gentle, friendly, and curious nature, and they tend to be fantastic eaters--which is a great characteristic for captive snakes but does mean that a mistaken feeding bite can happen to keepers! Because of their popularity and the vast amount of time they've been bred in captivity, there is a huge variety of different morphs found among corn snakes! Albino corn snakes may also be referred to as amelanistic, and their lack of the melanin gene (which is responsible for brown and black coloration) gives them the light orange and red 'saddles' down the length of their body without the black border found in wild type corn snakes--they also lack the typical corn snake "checker" pattern of black scales on their belly! Tessera corn snakes were named for the 'tessellated' blotch pattern that runs down their sides, and they lack the typical saddles found of wild type corn snakes, instead sporting a 'chain-link' pattern down their spine.

[stuffs-i-wrote]

Themes of Childhood SA and Abuse

If you can think of anything else I didn't warn about, be sure to let me know.

---

There once was a little girl. She didn’t have a name, or maybe she did and just forgot? Anyway, this little girl had two parents who loved her very much. Her daddy was a rockstar and made magic with his fingers, her mommy was… Actually… I don’t remember what Mommy did.

Unimportant! What’s important was how happy they all were together! Their house was always warm and full of loud music. Booming vocals, powerful basses, and wailing guitars. The little girl was in love with the men on her daddy’s posters and the sounds they made. The guitarists were her favorite. Daddy played guitar and promised the little girl he would teach her how to one day. When she was older, he always said. 

Then a bunch of stuff happened, I can’t remember what, then the mommy dies and the daddy was sad. He was so sad that he forgot about the little girl. He was gone more often. The little girl was left alone in their house, that felt so much bigger now. When she told her daddy she missed him, he began to give her special drinks before he left. The drinks tasted chalky and made the little girl tired, but she did it anyway. 

One day, when Daddy was gone, something knocked on the door. The little girl was asleep in her room and didn’t hear it. The thing knocked one, then twice, then a third time before leaving. The girl woke up the next day, when the knocking thing came back. Again, it knocked once, twice, and a third time. The little girl hid under Daddy’s bed while it knocked. The third day was when the little girl opened the door. She was so curious she couldn’t help it. 

There was a… a beaver! A beaver with a pearl necklace and a clipboard and pen. It wore red lipstick. It asked the little girl where her parents were and the little girl said that her mommy was dead and daddy was… somewhere? The beaver pursed its lips and wrote something on its clipboard. It went around the house, and saw the little girl’s special drink. Its eyes widened and the beaver quickly left, promising to come back the next day. Daddy came back the next day too, and met the beaver. The two whispered together before Daddy told the little girl to go pack her stuff, because she would be staying with someone else for a little bit. The beaver took the little girl to its car and drove away. 

The little girl was brought to a different house. This house was full of mice and had two adult rats. The mice got into the little girl’s bags. They chewed holes in her clothes and stole her socks. The rat-dad kept staring at the little girl, and when she tried to tell the rat-mom, it… I…

The little girl eventually left, the beaver picking her up and taking her to its dam. I-... the little girl doesn’t remember much after this. A few more houses with other different animals. A family of sloths, a bull and a chameleon, and an eagle. The little girl was older now, nearing twelve years old. She hadn’t seen her daddy in years. 

The last house was a lion’s den, and the girl was the only child in the home. The beaver said that would make it better on her, make it easier to get the things she needed. The man-lion was lazy and ignored the girl as best it could. The lioness was the girl’s favorite, and took her out for ice cream very often. One day, when the lioness wasn’t home, the lion did something. He did it a lot, and made the little girl promise not to tell the lioness, because that would mean the girl couldn’t stay. The girl wanted to stay more than anything. 

Things went on like this for a few months, until the girl’s belly got big. The lioness noticed and roared at the man-lion. The lioness took the girl to a big, brick building with blue letters on the front. The lioness told the girl to go in and they would go get ice cream later. There were nice snakes inside the building, and they made the thing in the girl’s belly go away. The lioness never came back. But there was a pig who came for her instead. The pig was kind, and told the girl that the lioness would come back, as long as she was good. The girl went with the pig to a big hospital with other pigs. 

Time passed quickly in the hospital, and the pigs got deep underneath the girl’s skin. She couldn’t tell anymore, what was her and what was them. Her mind was like a spool of thread. 

There were other kids in the hospital but the girl wasn’t allowed to talk to any of them. She liked to look at them though. There was a boy with large teeth who loved to smile at the girl, a girl with fire for hair and ink on her hands, and a group of kids who looked like robots and had very short hair. Those kids were surrounded by hyenas. The girl’s favorite were the two boys who looked like each other but weren’t brothers.One was in a wheelchair with glassy eyes and the other had to push him around, even though he struggled a lot. The girl asked her pig why he had to do that, but it told her not to worry about it. 

Some days the kids were given outside time. The robot kids were in lines, but the rest were allowed to walk around. The girl walked up to the boys and the one who walked told her it was her job to make the other boy happy. The girl thought about it for a bit, but then she remembered how happy the lion was while on top of her. The boy looked nervous, but he let the girl climb on top of the second boy. The glassy eyed boy put something in her mouth before the hyenas yanked the girl away.

The pigs were very mad that night. The girl’s pig locked her in her room. When she looked at the thing the glassy eyed boy gave her, it was a piece of metal with lines on the back. The girl used it to unlock her door and walked down the hall. It used to be white, but everything had red on it now. The girl wandered around, and there were pigs all over the floor. The girl could hear screams. The girl saw another door. The two boys were in it. She let them out. The glassy eyed boy no longer had glassy eyes and could walk. He smiled at the girl before pushing her to the ground and taking the piece of metal. The other boy left with him. 

The girl wandered around for a bit, before finding her way outside. There was a bird-man with big black wings and bright purple eyes. All of the kids surrounded him and the two boys stood in the very front. No one noticed the little girl leave. She walked for forever, taking a few buses. A black bird followed her. 

The girl eventually found the lioness’s home. There was a baby cub outside playing in the yard. The lion was gone. The little girl stood outside until night fell, and went inside the house, grabbing one of the toys the cub left outside. The lioness was asleep on the couch, her cub on her stomach. The girl stood in front of the lioness before raising the toy above her head. 

Before she could bring it down, two hands wrapped around the girl’s stomach. The bird-man was behind her, and whispering in her ear. The girl couldn’t hear it, but it made her drop the toy. The lioness woke up and reared back. The girl and the lioness stared at each other until the bird-man wrapped his wings around her and took her away. 

The end!

Ophelia finished her story with a smile, not noticing the looks of horror everyone else had on their faces. Darrias and Natalia in particular looked like they were going to vomit. Oliver looked to Simon, who had a blank face. Jolene reached down and patted Ophelia on the shoulder, trying for supportive. Ophelia looked at Chiron, and the two smiled at each other. “Darling,” he said, “You have such an amazing imagination!” The others winced, but at least it made Ophelia happy.

[kiunlo]

okay totally off topic for like basically anything i been posting but i was reminded a lot of the stories my mum would tell about when she was living in her little shack in Mannum when she was younger, and how she was so poor she had to sleep on a mattress on the floor, and the uh....situation with her shack was pretty dreadful. if she wasn't getting rats or mice crawling and skittering all over her bed, sometimes there would be red-belly black snakes slithering across the ground near her, and she couldn't really get them out (that's how you get bit) or prevent them from coming back in, so she had to just....grin and bare it. sometimes it wouldn't be black snakes tho, it'd be brown snakes. which can usually be a bit more dangerous than the red-bellies (still, not great to be bit by either of em). And I'm thinking to myself. i cant tell this story to the americans because otherwise they'll think that's normal and not like a severely desperate living situation of a poor aussie in the early 80s living in an actual fucking shitarse wooden shack that had no electricity and whose toilet consisted of an outhouse that was fucking haunted by some scary shit. if i tell that story it'll only embolden the americans to go "ohhh australia isso scary cuz of all those snakes!!" even more. do you know what's really scary cunt? poverty.

[sonorous-eisfyl]

what are your muse’s aesthetics? BOLD any which apply to your muse! remember to REPOST! feel free to add to the list!

[ COLOURS ]  ~  burgundy. red. crimson. scarlet. maroon. mahogany. copper. amber. chocolate. brown. tawny. tan. bronze. brass. orange. gold. saffron. yellow. chartreuse. spring green. lime. mint. green. olive. forest. turquoise. teal. cerulean. blue. navy. cobalt. periwinkle. indigo. pewter. plum. purple. magenta. fuchsia. lilac. lavender. pink. coral. peach. ivory. cream. white. silver. grey. smoke. charcoal. ebony. black. pastels. vibrant. matte. metallic. muted. dark. light.

[ BODY ] ~ mutations. claws. fangs. wings. tails. feathers. webs. spikes. scales. fur. stripes. spots. freckles. acne. bruises. scars. scratches. gashes. lashes. wounds. amputations. burns. brands. teeth. gums. tongues. lips. beards. mustaches. cheeks. noses. ears. eyes. eyelashes. eyebrows. hair. heads. neck. shoulders. collar bones. arms. elbows. wrists.  hands. fingers. breast. back. ribs. abs. belly. hips. curves. butts. legs. thighs. knees. shins. ankles. feet. toes. nails. sweat. spit. tears. blood. heart. stomach. lungs. liver. veins.  guts. bones. spine. muscle. skin. feline. canine. masculine. feminine.

[ WEAPONS ]  ~  bites. fists. sword. dagger. spear. arrow. bow. crossbow. hammer.  shield. poison. (bow)guns. axes. throwing axes. whips. knives. throwing knives. pepper sprays. tasers.  machine guns. slingshots. katanas. maces. staffs. wands. powers. magical items. magic. rocks. mud balls. bombs. missiles. boomerangs. lethal pets. lasers.

[ MATERIALS ]  ~ metal. gold. silver. platinum. pewter. titanium. iron. steel. copper. bronze. brass. tin. bismuth. diamonds. pearls. rubies. garnets. sapphires. emeralds. jade. peridots. alexandrite. opal. topaz. jasper. quartz. rose quartz. smoky quartz. amethyst. citrine. fluorite. amber. malachite. turquoise. lapis lazuli. sodalite. pyrite. labradorite.  moonstone.  petrified wood. wood. paper. parchment. hemp. canvas. burlap. oils. skin. muslin. rayon. faux. wool. fur. lace. leather. skins. suede. corduroy. silk. satin. chiffon. velvet. denim. linen. cotton. charcoal. clay. stone. rocks. flint. asphalt. brick. granite. marble. dust. rust. glitter. sand. dirt. mud. smoke. ash. carbonate. rubber. synthetics. nylon. polyester. plastic. glass. porcelain.  bone. shells. coral.

[ NATURE ]  ~ grass. leaves. trees. bark. flowers. roses. daisies. forget me nots. tulips. lavender. petals. thorns. seeds. hay. roots. ocean. pond. river. stream. waterfall. creek. meadow. forest. desert. tundra. savanna. rain forest. tropical. jungle. marsh. moors. swamp.  plains. hills. highlands. caves. underwater. coral reef. beach. waves. space.  clouds. mountains. fire. lava. ice. frost. water. air. earth. rain. snow. wind. moon. stars. sun.  heat. cold. steam. lightning. sunlight. moonlight. dawn. dusk. twilight. midnight. sunrise.  sunset. dewdrops. shadow. tornado. hurricane. water spout. thunder. hail. twisters. humidity. dryness.

[ ANIMALS ]  ~ birds. penguins. eagles. owls. falcons. vultures. hawks. swans. parrots. parakeets. doves. pigeons. ducks. robins. cardinals. blue jays. bluebirds. blackbirds. crows. ravens. magpies. mockingbirds. flamingos. ostriches. seagulls. albatross. peacocks. condors. finches. pelicans. chickens. geese. quail. bats. sheep. cows. buffalo. deer.  hedgehogs. elephants. horses. giraffes. cats. lions. tigers. pumas. cheetahs. jaguars. foxes. dogs. wolves. coyotes. bunnies. mice. rats. monkeys. apes. bears. pandas. polar bears. snakes. iguanas. chameleons. alligators. crocodiles. turtles. lizards. frogs. toads. whales. dolphins. fish. sharks. stingrays. octopus. lobsters. crabs. bugs. spiders. ants.  moths. butterflies. flies. maggots. roaches. ladybugs. beetles. cicadas. dragonflies. fleas. termites. leeches. worms. snails. mosquitoes. werewolves. unicorns. pegasus. dragons. dinosaurs.

[ FOODS/DRINKS ]  ~  pepper. salt. sugar. honey. syrup. caramel. candy. bubblegum.  mints.  candy canes. gumdrops. lollipops. chocolate. vanilla. cinnamon. ice cream. cake. cookies. brownies. biscuits. pie. tarts. lemonade. soda. champagne. wine. brandy. rum. whiskey. vodka. tequila. sake. beer. soju. gin. crema de cacao. cocoa. latte. coffee. tea.  spices. herbs. fruit. apples. oranges. lemons. cherries. strawberries. blueberries. raspberries. cranberries. watermelons. cantaloupes. bananas. coconuts. grapes. kiwi. pomegranates. tomatoes. vegetables. potatoes. cucumbers. carrots. turnips. onions. leeks.  celery. broccoli. cabbages. lettuces. roots. nuts. white meat. red meat. raw meat. veal. pork. chicken. beef. venison. fish. lobster. oysters. pizza. ambrosia. pasta. sandwiches. soup.

[ HOBBIES ]  ~  music. piano. flute. woodwinds. whistles. drums. guitar. cello. synthesizer.  violin. lute. harp. fiddle. harmonica. trumpet. brass. singing. composing. folk.  classical. bluegrass. blues. jazz. big band. pop. country. rock. punk. metal. electronica. hip hop. reggae. ska. rap. vinyl records. cassettes. cds. soundcloud. itunes. spotify. art.  sculpting. pottery. painting. watercolour. drawing. pastels. charcoal. sketching. graffiti. printing. inking. collecting. fighting. martial arts. self-defence. boxing. fencing. sumo. wrestling. jousting. paintball. lazer tag. duelling. hunting. fishing. climbing. weight lifting. training. sports. football. football (usa). rugby. baseball. cricket. lacrosse. volleyball. basketball. tennis. badminton. skating. cycling. sailing. rowing. hiking. running. gymnastics. dancing. ice skating. hockey.  reading. writing. cooking. sewing. acting. photography. video games. horseback riding. gardening. smithing. shopping. traveling. movies. theatre. libraries. books. magazines. playing cards. poker chips. chess. dice. science.

[ STYLE ]  ~ nudism. perfume. cologne. piercings. tattoos. henna. body paint. war paint.  make up. lipstick. mascara. eyeliner. eye shadow. powder. beauty marks. blush. nail polish. lingerie. fishnet. pantie-hoes. socks. stockings. leggings. long johns. under armor. corsets. sports bras. bustles. camisoles. blouses. button ups. tunics. vests. waistcoats. leather jackets. ponchos. sweaters/jumpers. hoodies. skirts. jeans. kilts. breeches. scarfs. cravats. ascots. belts. sashes. gloves. heels. sandals. platforms. tennis shoes. penny loafers. jordans. slippers. boots. cowboy boots. rain boots. army boots. armor. justaucorps. trench coats. capes. cloaks. burqa. suits. tuxedos. kimonos. saris. sun dresses. gowns. jewelry. earrings. nose rings. lip rings. tongue piercings. belly rings. gauges. eyebrow rings. necklaces. pearl strings. leis. bracelets. bangles. cuffs. watches. friendship bracelets. rings. pendants. lockets. broaches. boutonnieres. pocket watches. cuff links. hats. crowns. circlets. flower crowns. helmets. hijabs. turbans. baseball caps. cowboy hats. brocade. doublet. gorget. bracers. masks. cowls. braces. glasses. sun glasses. eye contacts. pyjamas.

[ MISC ]  ~ balloons. bubbles. candles. battle. war. diplomacy. peace. money. power.  clocks. photos. mirrors. pets. diary. fairy lights. madness. sanity. sadness. happiness. optimism. pessimism. loneliness. family. friends. assistants. co-workers. enemies.  loyalty. smoking. drugs. kindness. love. sex. hugs. duality. sin. lust. greed. wrath. envy. sloth. gluttony. pride. virtue. chivalry. honour. piety. charity. diligence. chastity. gentleness. aggression. romance. hatred. grief. pity. success. bitterness. sorrow. joy. fear. anger. good. evil. relativity. vampirism. sapphism. life. birth. time. death. illusion. silence.

[ganymedesbussy]

WIP: ark times snakefuckery

From his place near the railing, Aziraphale watched Crowley fly through the storm. He’d been at it for hours now, skimming low above the surface of the waters until he would take a sudden dive, arms reaching out to pluck up his prey as easily as a hawk catching a fish, and then turning to angle back towards the ark with another child held gently in his arms.

At first he’d had to grab the untended, the skinny strays with no parents looking over and ushering them inside. Later, as the waters rose, weeping mothers were pressing babies into his arms, raising them up high as he passed overhead. In the end, he just grabbed whichever ones he could find clinging to flotsam in the new and roiling sea, as many as he could carry. It wasn’t enough, but it never could be.

Now, though, the sky was darkening from the slate grey of rain clouds into the charcoal of dusk, and Crowley was still searching. He hadn’t returned with a new passenger for several hours, and the angel was worried.

Aziraphale gazed out at the open water, miracling up a bit of divine light to mark the location of the Ark, and by the time he heard the flapping of waterlogged wings and a body falling hard against the deck it was the only light left aside from the odd stroke of lightning. He ran to where Crowley had landed, a tangle of dark robes and feathers, and no passenger carried in his arms. Aziraphale looked back over the railing, and tried again not to picture the faces from the earlier crowd.

“Angel, help me out here,” said Crowley, clutching his robe. It bulged strangely at the chest, and the demon was twitching and wiggling as something moved inside it.

“Oh, of course.” He led Crowley into the ark, finally locking the hatch tight, and with a glance down the dim halls to make sure Noah and his family hadn't seen them, he led him into the room where he'd hidden the Mesopotamian children.

He probably shouldn't have done it – rather, he knew he shouldn't have done it, but once the waters had risen and children were being pressed into his arms, well, how could he not? The Almighty had told Noah to load his own family aboard, but nobody had mentioned to Aziraphale that he was supposed to just toss children over the sides, and surely it was a greater sin to murder based on what you thought someone might want than to save someone through kindness who it turns out hadn't meant to be saved.

(And if Aziraphale specifically avoided asking questions about what, precisely, his role ought to be, and didn't want to trouble Noah's family with the details, well... It had been rather a busy day, after all.)

The children were huddled together in various degrees of damp and nervous exhaustion. There were twenty-three, including seven infants, and as he followed Crowley inside and shut the door, he saw the demon reaching out to check on them all.

“Right,” he said, reaching into his robe. “So, here's the thing – not enough food for everyone for a month as is, yeah? BUT,” he held up one hand, forestalling quiet whimpers, and drew out a small black snake with a red belly. “See, thing is, 's a ship, and a ship's always got more mice and rats about than they think. So if you're okay with being a little snakey for a while, then there's plenty.” He continued to draw serpent after serpent from his robes, all of them small, some no thicker than his finger. They knotted and curled against each other, and Aziraphale could feel the tingle of demonic magic that had transformed them. “Now, I didn't have time to ask this lot permission first, so they're a bit shocked, but everyone who's old enough to say yes or no I want to hear from, okay?”

He reached his arms out to take one of the infants, who had cried themselves out hours ago. With a look of surprising tenderness, he stroked its hair, and both Aziraphale and the children watched as it shrunk down into one of the finger-sized snakes. “Even little snakes like this can hunt and eat, too,” he said, gently putting the new serpent down with the others. “It'll be like dreaming, I think, but when you wake up the water will all be gone.”

In the end, all of the children agreed to it, some because they were tired and wanted to dream, some because they were curious, and some because they didn't want to be the only ones left alone. One by one, Crowley embraced them, held their hands, whispered things Aziraphale didn't try to hear, and added snake after snake to the nest they'd wiggled into the straw. When the last one was done, he passed his hand over the group and murmured 'sleep', then sagged heavily against the wall.

“Okay, that's it for me,” he huffed, leaning his head back. “I'm knackered. Don't suppose you've got somewhere I could lay down?”

“Oh, goodness, of course,” Aziraphale said, only now taking in the state of his demonic companion. “Come now, I've a room, let's get you cleaned up, shall we?”

He bundled the demon inside the small cabin, miracling up a few fluffy cloths and rubbing them briskly against his chilled skin. There were dark circles underneath his eyes that hadn't been there before the rain, and the angel could feel him trembling slightly. With a wave of his hand, Aziraphale set the small brazier alight, offering what warmth he could in this meager space. His lips were a thin, worried line as he surveyed the demon, and he nodded brusquely. Those damp clothes would never do.

“Off with this, then,” he murmured, going to remove the tie at Crowley's waist. The demon’s yellow eyes only watched his hands as he rucked the dark robes slowly up his pale thighs, not moving to assist or hinder until Aziraphale gave him a gentle tug and a soft, “If you would, my dear?”

Crowley raised his arms and let the robes be pulled off, goosebumps rising on his limbs and nipples pebbling in the cold. He folded in on himself, arms against his thin chest, and brought his wings forward briefly before the wet slap of them against his skin made him grimace and banish them back to incorporeality. Aziraphale soon had him relatively dry and wrapped in a blanket, but he was still shivering and blue about the lips. Looking down at his own damp robes, Aziraphale stripped and joined him on the bed.

“Here, budge over,” the angel said. “It will be warmer if we share the blanket.”

With a soft whine, Crowley pressed his chest against the angel’s, and buried his face into the crook of his neck. Aziraphale found his arms coming up to pull the demon close without a thought, rubbing over his bare back, and he turned his head to press his lips against the soft red hair.

It felt so easy to give comfort like this, so natural. The feeling of the demon’s skin against his felt no different than any of the human bodies he’d held in times of grief or pain, and that he’d come to this pitiable state trying to save children, to do something that Aziraphale could only think of as so wholly good—

He made himself stop that line of thought in its tracks. He was, at that very moment, cuddling a very potent reminder of what happened to those who asked questions of Heaven.

Somehow, despite the thud of rain against the side of the ark and the occasional crack of thunder, despite the chilled and clammy skin of the demon in his arms, despite the subtle scratchiness of the blanket wrapped around them both and the smoke from the brazier, the rocking movement of the ship lulled them both to sleep.

------------------------------

When Aziraphale awoke the brazier had long gone cold, and the body entwined with his was no longer as man-shaped as it had been. From the waist up, Crowley looked much the same, red hair now dry and spilling over his shoulders, skin a much healthier pink, but tiny, clear scales ran down the sides of his face and neck

----------------------------------------------- SOMETHING GOES HERE ---------------------------------------------

Crowley ran his hands over the angel’s soft chest, reveling in the give of the flesh under his fingers. His tail wrapped around the angel’s thighs and calves, holding him in place beneath him, and he draped himself over the soft rise of his friend’s belly and settled his hips into the soft divot of his thighs. Aziraphale could feel a warmth moving through his body, an unfocused tingling of pleasure not unlike the first glass of wine of an evening, flushing through his veins and moving in waves from his chest to the end of his limbs. Oh, it was lovely, it was glorious, and in his enraptured state it took him a moment to notice the soft pressing of a slick warmth against the smooth blankness between his hips.

“Crowley, what-- ?”

“Hnng. Feelssss good, angel. So soft, so warm, like… dunno, some soft, warm thing.” His hands squeezed around Aziraphale’s middle, face moving lower to nuzzle into the valley between his pecs, and Aziraphale could feel the open drag of his mouth pressing kisses and licks into the skin there, soft touches of teeth that only served to heighten the sensations of the demon’s lips against him. He felt Crowley's broad, forked tongue flick against his nipple, and he gasped and arched into the pleasure of it. The demon moved back up to his neck, hissing softly, and pressed kiss after kiss along the line of his jaw. Aziraphale turned his head to capture Crowley’s lips, one hand coming to thread into his lovely red hair, and the other stroked along his side, feeling the subtle shift from skin to scales beneath his fingertips.

“You’re so lovely,” he whispered, “so thoughtful and kind and… oh, Crowley, you’re so good.” He was close enough to see the blush creep up Crowley’s cheeks and his mouth fall slightly open, to feel the deep, shivering breath that pushed their chests together. It stirred something in Aziraphale that he couldn’t quite name, some unfocused, restless hunger to cause those blushes again. He pressed soft kisses into the demon’s temple, nudged the demon’s cheek with his nose and stroked the back of his neck. “So good for me, darling. So wonderful, so perfect.” He could hear soft whimpers against his neck, feel the demon’s arms clutching his back, his long tail squeezing and clenching around his legs, and with the stuttering thrusts of his hips more of that warm slickness. Aziraphale let his hand trace over Crowley’s hip, following the line of scales to his belly, and down to the strange swelling where his human legs would part. “Can I look at you, darling? Can I see?”

Crowley rolled them to their sides, reluctantly releasing his hold on Aziraphale’s body to display his own. In the center of his belly scales he had a long slit, opened now with puffy pink flesh along the edges. Aziraphale trailed his fingers over it, and Crowley groaned, pressing his hips into the angel’s hand and leaving them coated in clear liquid. Intrigued, Aziraphale brought his fingers up and sniffed, then licked at them. It didn’t taste like anything he’d tried before, somewhere on the line between sweet and musky with an almost metallic tang. When he looked up from his musing, Crowley’s eyes were wide, and his blush had spread halfway down his chest.

“Angel,” he breathed, and seized him again in a kiss, his tongue lapping at Aziraphale’s lips to capture his own flavor from them. The tingling pleasure was running through the angel’s body again, and he nipped gently at Crowley's jaw before pushing him gently back so he could continue his exploration.

“Angel,” Crowley whined, “angel, please.” His vent pulsed under Aziraphale’s fingers, releasing more wetness and sliding two thick, red cocks into the angel’s waiting hand.

They were similar to the ones Aziraphale had seen on the humans, for the most part, though the skin was far pinker and softer, and the heads didn’t have a slit so much as a gentle bifurcation revealing a dark channel within. The heads were thick, the shafts slick, and where they met at Crowley’s opening they swelled again, pushing open the edges of his vent. The angel drew his hand slowly down to the base and back up again, fascinated by the slick-hard-soft texture of them, and the way touching them sparked more waves of warmth.

His hand was still stroking up and down along Crowley’s cocks, and the demon was moving his hips in time with him, pressing their bodies together again and wrapping his arms around Aziraphale’s shoulders. “You feel ssso good, angel. Ssso much better than rubbing off against my own ssscalesss.” Aziraphale could feel the slick cocks pressing against his belly, hot breath against his ear. “Wanna make you feel good too.”

He hadn’t manifested genitals of his own before, though he knew some of the other angels had, and gotten into enough trouble with them that it left aziraphale more than a little leery of the entire idea, but, oh -- Crowley did seem to be enjoying himself with them, and if he felt this lovely without having made the effort, how wonderful might it be if he did? Oh, what a shame that this was happening now, right when the Almighty was more than a little upset about the fruits of such divine unions. Regretfully, he shook his head, releasing his hold on Crowley’s cocks to hold the demon closer. “This feels lovely, darling, but I shouldn’t -- not with all this fuss over the Nephilim.”

“What’ve they got to do with anything?”

[FIND A WAY TO MAKE THIS CONVERSATION WORK, EXPLAIN THAT SEX MAKES BABIES BUT DON’T BRING UP UNICORNS OR IT WILL GET SAD]

“Oh, angel, there’s plenty we can still do.” His tail came and wrapped around Aziraphale’s legs, holding them tightly together, and Aziraphale gasped as he felt Crowley’s cocks slide into the space between the top of his thighs. The drag of them against his sensitive thighs was delicious, and the way that the wide base pressed against his bare mound! The skin there felt electric, the pleasure seeming to pulse in that space and then diffuse through the rest of his body. Crowley’s lips were sucking marks into his neck, his hands clutching at his sides, his hips, his cheeks, anywhere and everywhere he could sink his fingers in and grab. Aziraphale rocked against him, arms wrapped around the demon’s shoulders and hands tracing up and down his back.

Thinking back to those silky black feathers beneath his fingers, he pressed lightly between Crowley’s shoulder blades. “Let me touch you again,” he asked, and felt Crowley shiver as he brought his wings out once more.

At once that sweet smell enveloped him again, and he sank his fingers in deeply. Crowley groaned, hips thrusting forward with more force, and sank his teeth into the juncture of Aziraphale’s neck.

[testormblog]

Snakes, Agents of the Devil

From the moment I walked, Mother constantly warned me to watch out for snakes.  Every time I stepped outside, I scanned the ground for the slithery blighters.  Bing, my dog, was always hyper alert too.  He, a Fox Terrier, was a brilliant snake dog.  During our wanderings in the bush, he and I often saw the treacherous creatures.  When one slithered our way, he’d skirt around it then fearlessly attack it side on.  He’d bite its body and shake it violently until it died.

Snakes were a daily threat to everybody’s existence.  Even so, I only remember dogs and cats dying from snake bites, not any people.  To be honest, humans created the problem.  Our habitation of the area had brought farms, chook houses and rainwater tanks.  Mice and rats thrived on the grain stored to feed livestock and chickens.  The frogs happily spawned in the poorly maintained rainwater tanks.  Thus, with mice, rats, eggs, chicks and frogs on the menu, the snakes fed well and bred accordingly.  We also built them warm places to hide and hibernate for the winters.  Our wooden barns and houses weren’t snake proof.  The snakes found gaps between the boards to squeeze through.  They liked to curl up in linen cupboards or find somewhere warm in the kitchen when the annual chill came.  They easily moved about, camouflaged by the long grass everywhere.  Lawnmowers and slashers weren’t invented yet.  Mother kept two pet cats, monstrous killers, to despatch snakes and vermin seeking to live at our home. 

Thus, everybody feared snakes.  Furthermore, given the biblical references to serpents, these creatures exuded an evil mystic.  The superstitious and generally religious community thought them to be the Devil’s agents.  Such was its paranoia that people believed the surrounding area to be infested with a plague of them and every single one needed to be exterminated, irrespective of its poisonous status.  Whilst the browns and red belly blacks were lethal and whip snakes poisonous, the humble green tree snakes were neither.  If confronted, they slithered away or emitted a horrid stink.  There weren’t many carpet pythons around though.  Despite these pythons being over two metres in length, they were non venomous and wary of humans. 

Nevertheless, people killed every slithering creature they saw with whatever weapon they could grab, generally a shovel or a hoe but not an axe.  A person had to stay clear of a snake’s strike range.  Whilst a gun was the best option, not everybody had one sitting nearby when required.  Afterwards, they hung the snake’s carcass on their house fence, until it decayed, to proclaim their macabre victory and to act as a warning to others.  Some men boasted they could grab a snake by its tail, crack the devil like a whip and send its head flying off.  They probably drank a decent nip of rum first.  Many told tales of snakes.  These competed with the biggest fish stories fishermen recounted with the snakes increasing in size, length and ferocity over time.

My family had its own tales of altercation with snakes.  One day, Pop and I narrowly missed a tussle with a big blighter.  Pop was taking me home on the sulky with Bess, travelling along a disused track through some scrub.  We heard a loud rustle in a tree we were riding past.  Suddenly, a large black snake projected itself from the tree to another on the other side of the track.  It narrowly missed our heads.  Pop said some German profanities and stared at me in horrified incredulity.  I suppose his profanities were forgivable since they related to an ungodly creature.  A bird squawked.  We looked around to see the snake’s body hanging from a nest as it devoured the eggs inside.  If this snake had landed on Bess or us that would have been a right melee and a frightening one as we were defenceless.

Though, the snake, who found a warm home in our family’s thunderbox, created the most uproar, both in alarm and noise.  Mother disturbed a lethal red belly black from its hiding spot in the corner of the wooden closet.  This two metre long snake slithered through one of the vent holes in the closet and along the floor.  The gauze over these holes had rusted away.  Mother shrieked loudly enough for everybody nearby to hear and ran outside.  Me being a young boy at the time, I wasn’t far from her and was playing in the yard.  She yelled at me to watch the dunny from the outside to see where the snake would go.  I saw it silently skulk up the wall and out the gap where the wall met the roof.  It slithered upwards as far as it could then squeezed under the roof’s ridge cap, the tin piece that covered the join between the iron sheets.  I could still see its tail.

As Dad was away working, Mother rallied help from the neighbours.  In fact, the immediate community arrived, eager to participate in the snake hunt, with each person holding their chosen weapon.  Everybody had an idea how to coax the devil from its relative safety.  Somebody suggested throwing a bucket of boiling water at it.  Firing a gun at it was ruled out as the shot would have put a hole in the roof.  Men banged sticks on the dunny roof’s iron sheets.  Still, the snake didn’t move.  Eventually, the local sawmiller produced a hoe with a long wire wrapped around its end.  He poked the snake to tease it from the spot.  Another man was ready with a shovel.  When the snake slithered to the ground, he hit it quickly and hard to break its back.

If Mother had been bitten by the red belly black, she’d have run to the kitchen for the bottle of antivenene, everybody kept, and prayed hard that the potion worked.  Then she’d have had to act kindlier towards her uncle by marriage, Andy Stapleton, who concocted it.  Her family were jealous of his supposed wealth, earnt from his potion.  Apparently, he had watched a black snake bite a goanna.  Afterwards, the lizard searched for then consumed a certain weed.  It survived.  Andy distilled a potion from this weed and promoted it as successfully tested by himself though it wasn’t scientifically.  Nobody really knew if this ‘snake oil’ of his worked, and as its recipe died with Andy, nobody ever will.

Snakes, the Devil’s agents they are not.  They’re just predators in nature’s ecosystem, which we disturbed.  Nevertheless, I feared them as mortal enemies and some I still do.

[nityarawal]

11/4/2023

Favorite Prototype

Morning Songs

Happy Saturday

Thankyou Anyway

A Week Of Cray Cray

We Wouldn't Wish

It On Anyone

Estrangement Sin

We Keep Saying

Avert The Danger

Don't You Hear

4 Billion Moms Screaming

Put The Prude

Back In Pride

Avert The Danger

Don't You Hear

#4BillionMothersStrong 

"Avert The Danger,"

Maharishi Said:

"That Has Not Yet Come,"

Prudent Moms

9/11 Was A Red Flag

911 Number 

Emergency Services

Even Worse

Jihad Smears

From Courts

A Curse

On Any

Mixed American

Other

Or A Brown Mom

Unwanted

But For AI

Confusion

Taunted

For AI Dolls Like Us

#FreeBritney Delusions

Brands

For Poisons

Courts Don't Call 

Back

We Know About

Rats

King Henry

Didn't Matter That

Princess Diana Procured 

2 Perfect Son's

She Was Still

Killed By

The Monarchy

So We Scare 

For Starter Wives

Apartheid

Who Wouldn't 

Want To Be A

Disney Princess

Sing Your Boys Home

Pull The Plug On

Fighting

Wars

Dance With #FreeBritney 

Spears

Yellow Snake

Kardashian

Belly Dancing

From The Sandiego 

Zoo

Let Him Free

Just For A Few Minutes

With You And Me

Dancing

Shiva's Leopard

Cobra

Dancing Free

He Must Be

Grateful

Dreams

Of

Henna Tattooing

Private Parties

Only Women

Like Middle Eastern

Sacred Sisters'

Nights

Dancing Free

Mystical

Bringing Mitraism

Back

How Many Ways

To Be A Man

And Clap

For A Dancer Graciously

Kvon Prince Will Tell You

In Comedy Clubs

Clap

Tip

For The Women

For The Comedians Cry

Often No Alibis

At Misunderstandings

To Sufi Tribes

On Courts Bribes

Persian Men Clap

Dance Like Elvis

Eyes Sparkle

"Baraye,"

Twinkling Something

Transcendental

"Peace Love Liberty,"

Sufis Of The Middle

East

What Is That Unknown

Flicker

Knowingness

Please

Prince Cousins

Royalty

Tell Us

Please

Merci

Mitraism Lucky Ones

Remembering

Mystical Songs

Dancing Jigs

Hustling From Morning

Till Dawn

Jiggling lt

Skiing Writing Jokes

Swimming

Near Olympic Athletes

Models

Hiking 

Cleaning

Out

Cleansing

Teaching

Preaching

If You're One Of The Lucky

Ones

Free For A Moment

Here Today

Now

In Your Dressing Trailer

Too

Send A "Tootsie," Photo

To Me

#FreeJosh

I'm Sorry What

Israel Did To Thee

In Your Dressing Room

If You're Really

#Free

Send Your Favorite

Most Beautiful

#FreeBritney Photo

Remember Me

Lightly

Sophia Loren

Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwen Stefani

Lady Saw

Gwen Stefani 

Lady Gaga

Beauties

Claudia Schiffer

Brigitte Bardot

Guess Ads

If You Got A Little

Legally Blonde Light

For You

Let Her Out 

Please

Legally Blonde

Legally Brunette

Full Disclosure

I Know You Danced

In My Shoes Once

The Odds

Are Strong

Dance Me A River

Dance Me To Freedom

Dance With Me

Forgive Me

Polarity A Blessing

Men Are For Mars

That's Why You

Tell Us

Calmly

Freedom Of Speech

Is A Good Light

And You Bought It

What About China

What About The Middle 

East

What About Apartheid

America

What About Me

What About The Microcosm

The Little Mom

In Every Family

What About My Sisters

Crying In Their Pillows

Because It's Illegal

For Them You See

Mamma Lost Her 3

Baes

She Told Me Yesterday

At First She Coached

Them Full Disclosue

Then Tell Them

Not

Scared

Stopping Foster

Wars

Sexual Assaults

Not Dad

He's Innocenr

Officer Aikens 

Stole Her Car

Like Enoch The Pig Stole

Mine

Her Home

Her Husband

It's Been A Month

3 Babies Trafficked Too

CPS Promising

Re-Unification

Not Showing Up

Raped

Middle Man

Got Mammas Worried

4 Billion Strong

She Looked Like My

Best Friend Under

Her Stressed Mom

Exterior

She Looked Like My

Best Friend

A Mothers Heart

Freckles

Worn

Maybe Native

Once

She Looked Like My

Best Friend

Big Lips

Near Cahuilla

Why'd These Officers

Ever Think

They Had Carte

Blanche To Kidnap

Her Kids

Or Mine

They're Not #FreeBritney

Intelligence

To Barter

Who Was Your Favorite

Prototype

Of BBVA Then

PNC

Displayed

Wells Fargo

Fidelity

Blue Cross

IEHP

How Many Banks

Oxford

Silencing.org

Cambridge Analytica

Insurance Companies

Nurses

Dr's 

Pleas

BBC

Scams On

#Nitya4Eternity 

Or Was It Teen

Paris Hilton

Reality Winner

Winona Ryder

Alicia Silverstone

Jessica Alba

Who Was The Favorite

Robot

Cybergal

Madonna

Cindy Lauper

Taylor Swift

Which Singer

Wooed You All

The Prudent Firm

Nanny

That Put A Stop

To The AI

Usurping Protocall

Peace

All

Peace,

Nitya Nella Davigo Azam Moezzi Huntley Rawal