Today I had an extensive and deep conversation with my current partner about my feelings and concerns regarding our relationship. I was shit scared because in previous relationships whenever I poured my heart out I would not feel listened, and they would act as if I were overreacting, invalidating whatever I shared at the time; today was very different. I poured my heart out, I cried, I cried some more, and then we took a deep breath and a small pause to then reconnect and listen to each other. I had this recurring thought in my head that this person would leave me crying my heart out, feeling empty and then end the relationship, but it was not like that. I felt validated, listened but overall I felt loved.
I have always believed that better things and better people come after we learn some lessons with previous relationships, but this was such a huge step and even an affirmation that good things do come after whatever shit you're going through.
This is a small event in my life that I would like to share here to let you know that it does get better, your thoughts matter and your emotions are important, no matter how irrelevant or small you may think they are, it is all in that pretty little head of yours, remember sometimes our mind is our worst enemy and we must work to not let it win.
Among a thousand verses
I found one more reason to continue
Sometimes I feel that in certain circumstances I could not do anything but run away
But when I see the sky I feel more comforted, as if everything is fine for a few seconds
I don't need anything else, and I feel happy to be able to contemplate that sky
If I could ask for one thing, it would be that, those moments so small that they make me forget
Where any bad time disappears and that make me feel so small but at the same time with I feel a great peace that spreads inside me.
And slowly the pain goes away.
Everything hinges on my final breath,
From the whirlwinds I desire to grasp the light beneath.
From learning darkness to see colors in death.
Everything hinges on my final farewell,
To truly feel, in this life's earthly spell,
Only when I embrace the great unknown,
After the desert, vast, arid, and overthrown.
Doubt, envy, blindness we must leave behind,
Our own limitations and fears we must unwind.
Perhaps we row towards an unknown shore,
Or maybe we know where we yearn to explore.
But everything depends on my demise,
To enter the realm of thoughts, a grand surprise.
To die with these eyes and this unique gaze,
Then reborn with fresh eyes, in life's new maze.
Yet everything, indeed, relies on the end,
To die, and through death, a new life to ascend.
Living Wholeheartedly
You know, when it’s all said and done, what I really want is to exit this crazy world with a heart that’s been through the wringer, tender and worn-out in the best possible way. I mean, I want to look back and feel that ache in my chest, the kind that comes from loving deeply, caring fiercely, and feeling everything to the fullest. I want to leave knowing that I didn’t hold…