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patrophthia · 1 year

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it wasn’t implied? | remus lupin

pairing: remus lupin x reader

genre: fluff, pining, maybe angst¿?, miscommunications, secret confessions, not proofread

wc: 4.2k

originally posted on wattpad

"i saw you," sirius said lowly, smirking, "you two think you're so sly but i see everything."

"i don't know what you're talking about."

"sure, you don't," he remarked with a roll of his eyes, "you never know what i'm talking about, not when i told you that your crush on remus was obvious, not when i tell you that remus fancies you back and definitely not when i saw —with my very own two eyes— you kissing."

"just be careful doll, i've been there before," he told her softly, making her glance at him. "you've been there before?" she repeated testingly, not understanding what sirius meant. "i was once remus when i was younger."

"where should we go next?" peter asked excitedly, holding onto the teddy sirius had won for him for dear life.

it was a hogsmeade weekend, the marauders had decided that it was a bright idea to sneak off to an amusement park. the sun was setting, a pretty mix of pink and blues with hint of gold within it. they stood in the middle of the park, pulling at their coat tightly to keep themselves warm whilst james suffered in a corner.

"definitely not the roller coaster again," said lily wearily, eyeing james from where she stood as he hunched over a garbage can with remus and sirius to his side. "anything but the roller coaster again."

"i'm pretty sure they're done with it," she said kindly, watching as remus rubbed james' back in a soothing manner, "we've been on it four times now, i don't think they'd like to go on it for any longer."

"hopefully, you're right," lily muttered under her breath as the group of boys returned.

james looked up, smiling charmingly. "what's next?"

"i wanted to go on the ferris wheel," said sirius off-handedly, his hands digging into his pocket to keep itself away from the cold, "the sunset's nice."

"okay," lily agreed; nodding her head as she approached james' side, lily looped her arm around his and began leading the way when she realized that two of their friends were missing. turning around, lily spotted the pair conversing between themselves. "guys?"

"yes?" remus looked up, finally noticing that their friends were ten steps away and blushed. "sorry."

lily only smiled, giving him a pointed look and glanced down slightly. "is she cold?"

"very," she answered, voice muffled as her head was pressed against remus' torso, holding onto him tightly. "remus is very warm."

"of course, he is. the man's a human furnace," sirius said, almost frowning, "now, c'mon i want to see prongs throw up again."

"that's disgusting," she whispered just loud enough for remus to hear, moving her head slightly to look up at him.

"it's pads, what'd you expect?" he asked in return, smiling fondly at her.

she scrunched her nose in disgust, accidentally picturing james going through hell once more at sirius expense. "less suffering for the man who's already legally blind?"

remus laughed at that, making sirius groan even more. "would you stop flirting please?" sirius whined dramatically, "seriously princess, are we going to get an apology here?"

pulling away from remus completely, she stood besides him and assessed their friends.

"sorry, i made you wait because i was cold," she started slowly, feeling as though she was a kid waking up her parents to tell them she'd done something bad. sirius tutted, pulling out his wand and casted a warming charm on her. "can we go ride the ferris wheel now?"

"of course, we can," sirius said brightly, all signs of his previous sour mood disappearing.

sirius led the way this time, bantering with lily as remus and [name] walked slightly behind. shoulders brushing against one another as they listened into their friends arguing.

somewhere between where they started to the waiting line, remus had managed to slip his hand into her's intertwining them together.

she looked up at him, surprised —not to mention, extremely flustered, and smiled. an action that remus reciprocated along with a comforting squeeze of her hand.

james, lily, sirius, and peter took a car of their own. insisting that remus was too tall (as if it made any sense) to fit into their carriage so it would be better to have her accompany him as to not have him be lonely. all four completely oblivious to just how obvious their match making attempt was.

"this is nice," remus commented absentmindedly, looking over his shoulder, "it's so pretty up here."

"it is," she concurred, eyes kept on remus. tinge of pink and blue with the slightest hint of purple, painted his face, green eyes shining brightly. "they're taking pictures of us."

remus turned abruptly, concern written all over his face, "what?"

"them." she pointed upwards, remus eyed her direction and found their friends in the other car grinning and waving at them.

lily had her polaroid camera in her hand, it pointing at them. she gestured her over, shouting about how she couldn't fit her into the frame unless she sat besides remus. she followed her request, moving to sit by his side and looked up at them.

their was a flash, lily took the first polaroid out and handed it to james who was besides her. "smile!" she shouted before adding, "move closer, [name]! you're too far away!"

again, she did what she was told, scooting over and rested her head on remus' shoulder, smiling up at lily. remus laid his head on top of hers, beaming at the camera as well. lily counted from three and the flash went, sitting back down when she was satisfied with its result.

remus hand found hers once more, holding onto it firmly. "i think i might fall asleep."

"go ahead," she said lightly, "i've been working on my levitation spell, i can get you back to hogwarts safely."

remus lifted his head up so he could look at her properly. "as much as i am honored to the first person you murder, i'm really not looking forward to dying so soon."

she moved away from his shoulder, gaping at him with mock offense. "you underestimate me, mister lupin."

"and i've always been correct with my underestimations."

"that's not a kind way to talk to your best friend."

"actually i can talk to my best friend however i want," he said matter-of-factly, "that's kind of the point of being best friends with someone, being able to act however you want."

"you know what," she said, scooting away from him, "i don't want to be near you anymore."

"is that so?" he taunted, pulling at her hand.

"it is."

"i don't believe you." he leaned forward, pushing at her buttons. the full moon was near, which meant remus' senses had been heightened, making the both of them fully aware of just how fast her heart was beating. "i really don't believe you."

within seconds his lips are on hers, closing the gap between him and her without any hesitation. the line of whether their relationship was platonic or romantic, now crossed. remus tilted his head, leaning down to help her from straining her neck. the kiss was innocent, pulling to a stop when they were ushered out of their car by their friends.

remus cheeks were red when he left the carriage, blaming it on the cold wind. james had swept remus into a conversation about the prosperity of churros when remus took her hand again, holding onto it as he amused james with questions.

sirius was walking besides her, hands tuck in his leather jacket. he nudged her lightly —an action that almost knocked her off of her feet if it weren't for remus catching her. remus scolded sirius quickly before turning to check on her, after being satisfied with her answer he turned back to james.

"i saw you," sirius said lowly, smirking, "you two think you're so sly but i see everything."

"i don't know what you're talking about."

"sirius, you're seventeen stop talking like you're in your eighties," she said exasperatedly, "and i'm really confuse right now. what the fuck do you mean you were once remus, were you once tall and cute or something?"

sirius made a face, one of offense and irritation with the slightest tint of hurt. "are you calling me short and ugly? you wound me, sweetheart."

"i'm not calling you short, sirius. it's just that i don't have the crippling fear that you would suddenly lick my head when i'm near you."

"tall people don't do that," sirius frowned, "do they?

"i wouldn't know," she shrugged.

"anyways." sirius dragged out, moving back to the topic at hand. "what i'm trying to say is that i've put someone in the same situation as you and moony right now. it doesn't end well, [name]."

"it's really confusing —and if i'm being completely honest here, i feel guilty for everything that happened," he confessed quietly, "i made it complicated. when it could've been so easy.

"so . . ." sirius trailed off, watching her with patient grey eyes, "talk to him. make sure you know where the two of you stand before everything goes wrong."

sirius gave her one last reassuring smile before he tuned into their friends discussion on churros. remus let out a laugh at one of james' comment, a pretty smile on his lips that may or may not have pulled at her heart string.

fuck remus, where did she stand?

•••

sirius was laying on the couch, james sitting on the floor besides him along with peter while remus sat on the armchair when lily and her found them in the gryffindor's common room. there was a girl, hunched over the coffee table, a small notebook in hand talking to james and sirius as she wrote down whatever she found important.

she must've felt her presence, looking up at them with a small smile. "dorcas, we had care of magical creatures together in third year."

she replied with her name, smiling as well. "what were you three talking about?"

"a project," she said enthusiastically.

lily sat down besides james, and patted the empty spot to her left for her to take. she was about to take a seat beside lily when something tugged at her hand, she turned, following the direction of her distraction and found remus smiling at her, his hand holding onto hers.

"sit with me." she was hesitant, not knowing where she was supposed to go when the chair was so small. remus must've noticed, pulling her directly into his lap and wrapped an arm around her waist, securing her in her spot.

dorcas didn't even bat an eyelash when she continued on, "would you like to hear about it?"

"sure."

dorcas began her explanation with a clap of her hands. "so i've been reading a new romance novel and in it there's this muggle newspapers thing where people can mail something they wanted to say to someone they loved or cared for, whether romantically or platonically, it was called the W.L.U segment —standing for words left unsaid."

"i thought it was cool so i asked dumbledore if i could somehow pull an event together and he said no but i'm known to be quite annoying so i used that to my advantage and eventually he agreed."

"so." she clapped her hands together. "on march, thirteen, the fifth floor corridor will be plastered by sticky notes with hand written words on them for each person that is submitted to. it is by first name only and there would be a spell to prevent you from actually recognizing who's ever hand writing it is, so everything will be anonymous."

she had many questions, unsure how everything will work out like dorcas planned it out to. there was thousands of students at hogwarts, how can she fit them all in the corridors (even if the name were to overlap), how will the letters be submitted if it was anonymous, and most importantly —how will filch's cat resist the urge to claw off all the notes?

instead she settled on asking, "march thirteen?"

"it's when my dad first met my mother," she said with small smile, "under a clementine tree."

"can everyone just submit anonymously?" peter asked, intrigued.

"that's pretty much the whole idea, no one would know who said what. we're giving out special notes that would magick itself out of your life the second you've finished writing and it would be added to the wall. the notes will be owled out to everyone, because if you saw someone trying to get the notes you'll be suspicious of them, ya know?"

and then she added, "the identities would be unknown unless you sign it off with your full name, or initials for whoever it is you wrote it to, to guess. it's up to you really, if you want your identity to be known then you make it known."

"are you sure it will stay anonymous?" he followed up skeptically.

"cross my heart. not even the ones preparing this project would know."

•••

march came fast, so did remus' birthday —an event that had left her more confuse then she was before hand. the marauders had threw him a surprise party, one she attended in high spirits.

around midnight, marlene had dragged her into a circle where their friends was waiting for her. "we're playing truth or dare," she had told her.

the first few rounds was fun for the most part, her having done stupid dares that had spilled out of peter's drunken lips (the gryffindor is the funniest when he's absolutely wasted).

remus' birthday cake sat in the center of the circle, everyone enjoying their slices while they played the game. remus picked dare for the third time, keeping up with the courageous gryffindor spirit.

dorcas perked up at this, getting her word in before anyone else could. "i dare you to kiss the person you find most beautiful in this room."

sirius had pouted his lips out for him only to be blatantly ignored by remus. the room was —more or less— unphased when remus had made his way over to [name], cupping her face and kissed her.

soft and quick.

when he pulled away, he made his way back to his seat and acted like nothing had happened.

dorcas nudged her from her right, giggling slightly as she spoke, "i knew he would kiss you."

then the question she tried so desperately to forget resurfaces. what were they? where did she stand?

the next day comes and dumbledore introduced the project at dinner, letting dorcas up on the podium which she spoke at proudly, informing everyone of her plans and answering any questions they had.

the notes arrived the next morning, students walked around chatting about who they planned to write to and by dinner time half of the castle had written and sent off their first notes.

march, thirteen came and she was rudely awakened by dorcas and sirius pounding at her door, announcing that the project has been opened for viewing and that they needed to see it as soon as possible.

she quickly got dressed and followed them into the common room. stood by the entrance was the rest of their friend group, all looking tired out of their mind.

james led the way towards the fifth floor, the corridors walls littered with notes, all belonging to a group of names in alphabetical order.

their group went through the names one by one, being nosy when there seemed to be some sort of drama in the mysterious notes. some of the notes were on the sweet side, some malicious.

james was a common name but they were —luckily enough— able to identify which one was their james based off of how some referred him as 'the quidditch king' or 'james, potter, james potter' or the last (and definitely sirius' favorite way of identifying james out of them all) was 'james, the four eyed one.'

there was various love confessions, some cussing him for not giving them a position on the gryffindor's quidditch team, and some compliments about how much they wanted to run their hands through his beautiful, beautiful hair.

"you smell." sirius read out loud, ignoring the tiny :) that was drawn on the note to laugh at james' face. "i think that's for you, prongs."

"shut up, pads. you smell like wet dog."

then was the letter R standing tall above the name remus. on the wall stuck countless amount of notes, all confessing just how pretty they thought remus was. his pretty eyes, his pretty nose, his pretty lips and how much they wanted to kiss it and his stupidly pretty hands.

"good god moony, what spell have you put hogwarts under," james said slightly horrified, his eyes gluing to each notes that stuck under the name remus, "what have you done?"

"i haven't done anything," remus replied, his tone defensive, "and we can't be sure this is about me, i'm not the only person named remus."

"yeah but you're the only person in this school with that name." dorcas pointed out, just as fascinated as the rest of them with the amount of letters he received.

something caught her attention, making her take a step forward so she could get a better look at it. dorcas turned to her friend, fingers pointed at a note written in blue paper. "this handwriting looks familiar."

she followed dorcas' hand, reading the note to herself. i'm so confuse, remus. where do i stand? am i your girlfriend or am i just a girl that's a friend?

below it was another note written with same handwriting. i shouldn't have let you kissed me the first time and i definitely shouldn't have let you done it the second since all it did was amplify how i feel for you.

sirius cleared his throat loudly, pulling their attention to him. "this is boring," he began, grey eyes firmly locked with her, "let's go read mine."

he pulled her away with a smile to the others, hoping that they'd follow without questioning. "you wrote it didn't you?"

"wrote what." she acted oblivious, standing before the wall filled with notes for the name sirius. he, like remus, was the only one with that name.

"those notes." he rolled his eyes, annoyed.

"isn't there supposed to be a spell to prevent people from knowing who wrote it?"

"there is," he concurred, "i actually don't know for sure. 's why i'm asking you. i don't recognize your hand writing but i know the situation mentioned like the back of my hands. i can only assume and i know they can too."

"so now everyone knows that i'm confused about what remus and i are?"

"pretty much," lily joined in, standing besides her. "god, sirius why is so many people angry at you?"

"why people are upset with me is not important right now," said sirius distractedly, "what's important is that moony read those notes —just like we did, need i remind you— and he still hasn't come to try and talk to you."

"maybe he doesn't know it's from me—"

"remus is not a basket case, darling," cut in sirius. "he's being slow on purpose."

lily tsked. "men are stupid, [name]." she reminded, not sparing a second at the baffled look sirius threw her. "let's go read the ones with your name on it."

there was only so many notes for someone with her name, all littered with different colors and signed with their initials on it. she didn't know half of the possible initials but one specifically caught her eyes.

r.l

she hoped, despite knowing that she shouldn't, hoped that it was from him and that he had written it for her.

above the initials was the note itself, written in a set of neat handwritings that was so similar and yet so unidentifiable, it had her heart jumping to her throat.

i had hoped that one day i could shun you out of my mind but i cannot, not when you are the only thing running through it. not when the idea that you'd let me kiss you again is stuck in my mind. the same mind that hasn't stopped thinking about you before i even knew how much i liked you.

i can only hope you would forgive me for it. r.l

"you know," sirius said slowly, eyeing the note, "this whole confession thing would be so much easier if you just talked to each other."

"like you're the one to talk sirius," lily scoffed, "you wrote regulus a lengthy five note apology letter instead of just saying sorry."

sirius flushed at that, turning away from lily bashfully as he muttered under his breath about how she was no fun.

•••

dinner came after classes as usual. dumbledore gave the podium once more to dorcas for her to express just how grateful she was that so many people participated in the project, welcoming feedbacks with open arms.

dorcas thanked james, lily, and sirius, respectfully giving them credit where it's due. dorcas was half way off the podium when her eyes widened comically, running back towards frantically. "just one more thing."

"if someone has said something to you and you're sure that it's meant for you from that special someone." dorcas looked at her pointedly, making her avert her eyes. "talk to them, work it out. that's all, goodnight."

dessert wasn't even able to make its appearance when she was hunted down by the marauders.

"i need to talk to you." remus took a step forward cautiously. "please?"

the five of them trudge towards the nearest empty room, the other three boys leaving to give them privacy. "so," she drawled, "what did you want to talk about?"

"why did you ask me if you were my girlfriend?" he asked directly, not seeing the point of beating around the bush.

"isn't it self explanatory?"

"no, it's not actually," said remus, annoyance etching into his tone, "would you care to explain why you said so?"

"i said it so because, i wasn't sure if i was."

"you weren't sure if you were my girlfriend?" remus scoffed, narrowing his eyes incredulously, "then what were you?"

"i dunno," she said lowly, feeling stupid that this conversation was even happening in the first place, "it's what i'm trying to find out."

"okay wait." remus took in a deep breath, his hand in a pausing motion. "so for the last three months, i thought that you were my girlfriend while you thought i was just some friend who goes around kissing people?"

"that's not—"

"it's not? because, it seems to me like you thought so."

"well it's not my fault you never made it clear!"

"and it's not my fault you never asked," he argued, "because, if you did —for even just once, we wouldn't be fighting right now."

she stared at him in silence, feeling speechless. "i'm so confuse."

"you're confuse?" he asked, almost taunting, "i'm fucking confuse. i've been thinking that you were my girlfriend since i kissed you in that goddamn ferris wheel."

"you thought we've been dating for three months?"

"yes," he said with a nod, "since we went on that ferris wheel and i kissed you. you didn't pull away, you kissed me back so i thought the feelings were mutual but apparently not."

"so that night," she murmured slowly, "your birthday." she clarified. "you kissed me because you were my 'boyfriend' and not because you were drunk."

"i kissed you because, you truly were the most beautiful person in that room," remus sighed, "why would you even think otherwise?"

"i don't know—" she paused, feeling pathetic, "it's just something sirius said after we kissed, it got me thinking—"

"of course, it's fucking sirius," remus cut in, laughing dryly, "the lad makes one relationship mistake and thinks he's qualified to go off and give advice. look where that got us now."

they could hear a scowl from outside the room before a smack landed, a loud ow! and a shut up you twat, you messed this up once already following in its wake.

"nowhere bad," she said, defending sirius slightly, "he actually told me to talk to you but i didn't so it's technically my fault."

"it's not your fault, [name]." remus frowned. "this could never be your fault. i kissed you not once but twice and never bothered to talk to you about it. it was stupid of me to think it was mutual."

"but it was, remus," she told him, "the kiss. everything. it was all mutual. i just— i didn't know that i was your girlfriend."

"then i must be one shitty boyfriend," he snickered, chewing on his bottom lip.

"will you just shut up and kiss me?" she took a step towards him. "as my boyfriend this time."

remus met her in the middle, smiling shyly. "how could i ever say no to you."

—from bee: this is incredibly inspired by the unsent project,, check it out it’s pretty cool!!

#remus lupin x reader #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin x yn #remus lupin x you #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin crack #remus lupin fanfic #remus lupin Humor #remus lupin imagines #remus lupin Angst #remus lupin scenarios #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin #🧳: my writing

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sp1rit-realm · 4 months

Text

༻¨*:· 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐓 ·:*¨༺

༻¨*:· summary ·:*¨༺ you hate remus lupin, and he hates you. what happens when you get stuck in a lift together?

༻¨*:· notes ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 WEDDING!!!!! 𖦹 enemies to ?? 𖦹 fem!reader 𖦹 oh. em. gee. 𖦹 i did not proofread this bc i'm lazy ⎝(ˊᗜˋ)⎠

༻¨*:· word count ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 1.7k

prologue / IOU << pt. 11 -- wedding >> epilogue

༻¨*:· 𝐖𝐄𝐃𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 ·:*¨༺

Your hands are flittering around, messing with your hair for the fifth time in the past three minutes, and you sigh. It just won't look nice, you decide. Then, there's a knock on your door, and you frantically grab everything you need and stuff it into your purse. You open the door to see Remus in a suit. He looks beautiful, and you watch him blush as you tell him.

"Well, I think you look positively lovely today." He says, now watching as you get flustered.

"What are you? A proper lad?" You deflect.

"Your hair looks nice."

"Really? I've been fussing with it this whole morning," You huff, "I feel like whenever I need it to behave, it never does."

"It looks beautiful."

"Thank you," You gleam.

. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

Harry is the ring bearer. He doesn't understand what's happening as he walks down the aisle playing with the ring, but he's happy when everybody claps for him—giggling and hiding his face in his hands.

Marlene and Dorcas say their vows, and you feel like crying.

"They're so in love," You whisper to Remus, who looks at you and smiles.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?"

You nod.

. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

You get a little tipsy at the reception, laughing so much that you snort at Remus's bad jokes.

Amongst your laughing, he becomes quiet, staring at you with adoration.

"Would you like to dance with me?"

His hands are holding onto your waist, and your feet are stumbling and tripping all over his.

"You're bad at this," Remus mumbles.

"I'm drunk," You mumble back.

"I'm positive you'd be just as bad sober."

You laugh for the umpteenth time that night.

. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

You can't quite recall what Remus has said as you stumble into the lift, but you giggle like it's the funniest thing you've ever heard.

"Y'know," You mumble, hiding your face in his arm, "I don't think I'd mind getting stuck with you in this lift again."

His face flushes a bright red, "Yeah?"

"I like you lots, Remus."

"I like you lots, too." He whispers.

You wobble as you walk to your door, and your dreams come true when Remus steadies you—holding you around your waist—pulling you closer to him.

. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

"Remus!" You whine, looking at him with those sad eyes—bottom lip jutted out.

"Yes, m'love?" He murmurs.

"Can't take my shoes off," You look down at your strappy heels, then back to him, "Will you do it?"

He gets down on one knee, and your mind flashes through hundreds of different scenarios, all ending with you in his arms.

You shake your head, hoping that will rid the thoughts. He just looks up at you and smiles—it doesn't help.

"C'mon, love," He whispers, guiding you to the bathroom.

"Where are we going?" You slur.

"Bathroom, to take your makeup off."

"You're so sweet," You give him a dopey smile with tired eyes.

"Anything for my favorite girl."

You hum.

Favorite girl. The words ring in your ears over and over until Remus calls your name.

"Hm?"

He lets out a breathy laugh, "I asked where your makeup remover is."

You instruct him on how to remove your makeup, eyes flickering down to his lips every now and then—his are doing the same.

. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

"What clothes do you wear to bed?" He asks in the bedroom.

"Bed clothes, duh." You smile, all giddy and lovely, and Remus can't take it.

"Yeah? And which clothes would that be?"

"Y'know," You put your arms around his neck, mimicking the dancing from earlier in the night, "The ones I sleep in," You bite your bottom lip, trying to hide your smile. It doesn't work.

He holds your waist, "M'love," His forehead touches yours, "You need to tell me which clothes you wear to bed."

You ignore his pleading, "You have nice lips," You mumble.

"Yeah? So do you."

You hide your face in his shoulder—cheeks getting warmer by the second.

"C'mon, pretty girl," He whispers, "Look at me."

You shake your head, ruffling your hair in the process.

"Why not, baby?"

Your whole body goes hot, "Why should I?"

"Can I kiss you?" His voice is soft and low and needy.

You look at him, "Please."

"You're so pretty," He mumbles so closely that you can feel his breath on your lips.

"You're prettier," You whisper back.

"Not possible." And then his lips are on yours, and it's dizzying and electrifying; it's everything you've ever wanted.

You feel him smile, and you smile back—teeth hitting teeth, and you laugh, pulling away from him.

"I like you so much, Remus." You whisper.

"I like you so much, too." He whispers back, "Now, which clothes are your bed clothes?"

You laugh, "I'll get them."

"Don't fall on your way there."

"Ha! I won't," But you almost trip on the pile of clothes in front of your dresser, and you can hear Remus let out a breathy laugh from the doorway.

"Shut up!"

"I literally said nothing."

"You laughed at me," You whine, making your way to the bathroom to change.

"I did no such thing," He denies.

"Sure." You emphasize the 'u' as you stumble around, trying to put your bottoms on.

"Be careful in there!" He calls with a smile on his face.

. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

"Stay?" You ask Remus as he leaves.

He laughs a little, "Love, the couch is too small for me."

"You can," You slightly shrug, "Stay in my bed with me. If you want."

"I don't have any clothes to wear," He frowns.

"Just sleep like this." You answer like the solution is right in front of him.

"Baby, I'm wearing slacks."

"Then take them off," You shrug, "Easy peasy."

"I'd just be in my boxers. Plus, I have this shirt on."

"It seems like you're looking for plenty of reasons to leave. You don't have to stay." The remark comes off as soft and wounded rather than snarky, like you intended.

"No, I can stay, pretty girl."

"You keep calling me that," You whisper, "Do you really think I'm pretty?"

"I wouldn't lie about something like that, my lovely girl."

He's drunk on the smile you give him, and he can't help but kiss you again.

As he strips, you can't help but watch how the silver cast of the moon reflects on his scars. They gleam, and you find it twisted that he has them—that the moon causes them but makes them so beautiful.

He stands up, now only in his boxers, "Take a picture. It'll last longer."

Your face gets warm, "Sorry."

"I was only joking. No need to feel bad, m'love."

"You're just so pretty."

"Did I ever tell you flattery works on me?" He smiles, leaning down to kiss you once again.

"No, but I just had a feeling," You smile like a little kid on Christmas day. All giddy and full of excitement.

You roll onto the bed in a fit of giggles. Remus watches in amusement; he's never seen you so joyful.

After you're done rolling over to your side of your bed, you're tangled up in your blanket—neither of you are quite sure how it happened. Helping you unravel yourself, Remus tucks you in before laying on the other side of the bed.

You snuggle into his chest, "G'night, Remus." You mutter.

"Goodnight, my love. Sweet dreams," He whispers back.

. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

When you wake up, you and Remus are entangled in one another. Your legs are sandwiched together. His hand has slid up your arm—his other is going numb as it lies under your weight. One of your hands is wrapped around his torso, and your second one has found the nape of his head—fingers interlaced in his hair.

"Remus," You whisper against his neck, "Remus, wake up."

His response is a soft snore; you can't help but think this is domestic bliss. You and your lover waking up on a lazy Sunday morning, and you would kiss up his neck, lips finding his jaw.

"Remus," You try a little louder this time.

"Mmm," He mumbles, "Y/n?"

His eyes slowly open, sandman dust clinging to his lovely lashes.

"'Tis me," You whisper.

"We should get up."

"I don't want to," You whine.

"C'mon, love. Let's get up." He begins to detangle himself from you, and you immediately miss his warmth.

"Why?"

Remus leans down and kisses the pout right off your lips, "'Cos," He mutters, "It's time for breakfast."

"Breakfast?" You gleam.

"Mhm," He smiles.

"Where?"

"That diner you like."

You gasp, "Tina's diner?"

"That one." He smiles.

You walk to the lift, hand in hand with Remus.

He kisses you once you enter, and you can't help but smile.

"Remus?"

"Y/n?"

You get shy, looking at the ground, "Will you... be my boyfriend?" You shrug a little like the question's a casual one. And in some ways, it is. His heart has been yours since the start, and he's no longer scared to admit it.

"Yes. I will."

You and Remus decide not to tell anybody right now. Marlene and Dorcas have just been hitched, after all. It wouldn't be right to take away their spotlight.

You walk into the diner with him, and it's not suspicious for the two of you to be arriving together—you live in the same building. So the group has grown accustomed to you walking in with Remus, smiles on both of your faces as you reminisce about something stupid one of you has said on the way over.

But this time, there's something different. Everyone can sense the shift in the atmosphere. You're a little too close to Remus, and you're glowing. There's no stupid laughter to accompany a stupid joke that Remus never ends up telling.

Marlene smiles, leaning back in her chair, "How's the happy couple?"

You stop dead in your tracks, "Hm?"

"My lovely wife asked how the happy couple was," Dorcas speaks up.

"Shouldn't we be asking you that?" Remus asks with a quirked brow as he helps you into your seat.

"You two are dating!" Sirius yells—he couldn't hold it in any longer.

"Dating!" James sings, "You two are dating!"

Lily can't help but participate in the childish fun as she sings, "Remus and y/n sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G."

Remus is stark red, but you're laughing, and you look so carefree that Remus can't help but laugh.

"We're dating!" You confirm.

"We're dating." You repeat, softer.

WE'RE DATING AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEBDFIHSBFAJBNEFK

#hannah writes #remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin fanfiction #remus x reader #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x yn #remus lupin fanfic #young remus lupin #remus lupin angst #remus lupin fic #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x reader fluff #༻¨*:· 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐓 ·:*¨༺#remus lupin x fem!reader

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flusteredmoonn · 4 months

Text

dear john; remus lupin

summary: "but i took your matches, before fire could catch me," in which she shows him that his differences from the typical side of society is not something to fear.

tags: (SFW), angst to fluff?, hurt/comfort, drabble??, fast paced, implied gryffindor!reader, implied pre-existing relationship, vulnerable!remus, angsty!remus, lowkey selfloathing!remus, she/her pronouns, third person y/n. can be read as a sequel to 'back to decemeber' or as a standalone fic.

words: 700+

speak now tracklist. request.

"it's not that simple! you don't understand!" the boy aggressively shouted as he began to pace around the dormitory, "that's why i know we'll never truly work. it's better, for both of us, if you just moved on!"

"so help me to understand," she replied calmly, crossing her arms over her chest as her face softened slightly.

"it's complicated, it-"

"it's only complicated if you don't explain it to me, i want to help you, remus," her voice very quickly became stern which stopped the boy in his tracks, causing him to turn to face her. he looked at a loss for words, stunned at her bluntness as he searched for the explanatory words.

"things are different for me! i can't just be all reckless and spontaneous all the time," his voice was now exasperated, resuming his pacing as he gestured with his hands expressively.

"says the man who frequently plans reckless and spontaneous pranks throughout the school with his friends," y/n sassed, a slight smile hiding on her face.

"yes, but that's entirely more complicated, this is my whole point!" remus begged, stopping again as he became more solemn, "i have to plan my participation, and the boys have to plan my participation, based on what the moon phase is," he stressed, voice rasping and emphasising his distain.

the boy didn't stop there, he continued to ramble at his girlfriend about how his life was affected by his condition and the long lasting effects in the days after a full moon.

that moment was when she realised. he centred his life around it. he thought he was a werewolf, all of the time, and that's what everybody saw him as. even his friends. even her.

"wait, wait, wait," she suddenly spoke, as the boy stopped mid sentence, "i think i understand now," a brief smile of comfort braced her features.

"remus, you're not the wolf. not right now, not unless it's a full moon," her voice was definitive and sure.

"but i, i am! greyback-" remus became hesitant, he was unsure of what he was saying, "it lives inside of me, it's one of the only constants i have," he confessed vulnerably. her eyes were sincere as she processed his words, thinking of an appropriate reply.

"it's why we won't work, not in the end," he reiterated, "i don't want you to get hurt, everyone i care about inevitably gets hurt because of me. i don't want that for you," he finished in barely a whisper.

"what about james? or sirius? or peter? you haven't ever hurt them before," she questioned assuredly, almost certain that this would stump him. it didn't. she knew it when his face dropped.

"not physically, but emotionally. for years. before they found out. it was turmoil up until they knew," he confirmed, avoiding her gaze all of a sudden.

"and now? everything's surely got to be much better," y/n guessed, her voice dropping and octave with her uncertainty.

"i guess, but that doesn't change who i am," the boy refuted confidently.

"who are you, then?"

"i'm destined to bring horror and melancholy everywhere i go, and destroy everything i love in my wake, all because of the fact i transform into this beast every full moon. and i fail to remember who i've hurt when i do, or what i do," remus raised his voice slightly, trying desperately for it not to break.

"no you're not," the girl affirmed, looking at him as she took several paces forward.

"then, what am i?"

"you're smart, and witty, and brave, and funny, and kind, and loyal, and caring," she reached out to the boy, grasping his shoulders as she spoke, as if it would further infuse her point within the boy.

"and a monster," he added in the same tone y/n was using, hoping to convince her.

"no, you're not. you're not who you turn into," she ran her hand through the ends of his hair whilst she spoke, "you're the furthest thing from it. outside of the night of a full moon, you wouldn't even dare hurt a fly," confidence ran through her words.

"you're not a monster, remus lupin, you're a softie," she smiled up at him cheekily.

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inkdrinkerworld · 7 months

Text

Talk Too Much

Pairing: Remus Lupin x loud but shy!reader

Cw: college!au, fluff, kind of friends to lovers, obliviousness by Remus for a while, drinking (mentioned), smoking (cigarettes), I think that’s it

Wc: 2.2k

You’re a loudmouth. Through and through. Of all your friends, you honestly think you and James would be the ones to never shut up or run out of words.

That is until Remus transfers into the school and infiltrates your friend group and suddenly you find the words can run out.

It’s not on purpose.

It seems to take you over purely by coincidence- the way your throat gets dry and your tongue seems too heavy to form the words you want to get out when Remus seems to be paying attention to only you. His gaze isn’t unwelcome- that’s the entire problem.

You like the feeling of being what he looks at, but it feels too good, too natural.

His honey eyes that are just lightly flecked with green, and his sharp jawline that’s adorned with silvery scar tissue that somehow makes him even more handsome.

He’s also always got a cigarette to fiddle with.

You’ve only seen him smoke twice, and had been mesmerised by the way his cheeks hollow and how he blows the smoke out and it seems to curl around him like it’s unable to obey his exhales in the opposite direction.

He reminds you in a way of Charlie Dalton and Stephen Meeks.

Fctional characters who Remus seems to emulate in his confidence (from Charlie) and a sort of confidence that’s self-assured yet mild at the same time (a mix of the two) and that in itself makes you fall a little more for him.

It’s overwhelming- this attraction to him. It confuses you and has you tripping over words in your head, far less for if you voiced them and all that was heard were clunky excuses for sentences.

What makes your sudden bouts of silence obvious is the fact that your friends have caught onto you.

It’s not like it’s exceptionally hard to decipher either- you’re not really good at being subtle.

You suspect James and Sirius are taking bets on when it’ll all be too obvious for everyone to walk around it and you desperately hope that it takes months while simultaneously hoping it takes only weeks.

Remus notices the way your body freezes when you realise you’ve caught his attention in your storytelling. In his mind, it’s because you don’t like him.

The way you shrink down and suddenly go silent the moment his eyes set upon you, the way you remain quiet even though he sees the way the corners of your mouth twitch with something to say.

He thinks he’s put you off somehow, especially when the second he’s gone a little ways away to get a drink or get his lunch, you seem to perk right back up and dive into storytelling once more.

It bothers him so much he asks Sirius about it- a mistake in itself, because Sirius only pokes fun at his friend.

“If you can’t realise why she goes silent the moment you stare at her Lupin, I can’t help you.” Sirius walks off leaving Remus even more perplexed, moreso when he hears Sirius says, “How’s he so thick for someone doing so many higher classes?”

It bewilders Remus for weeks, your always sudden vows of silence and then your equally sudden broken vows.

You’re all at a house party when it comes to an almost end.

You’re dressed pretty like always, a skirt that hugs all the places Remus longs to touch and a top that shows a sliver of your stomach and Remus catches a glimpse of jewellery hanging in your navel.

Your ears have a pair of hanging bat earrings, and your necklace is your standard one- he’s sure he’s never seen you without it.

You’re smiling and laughing with Marlene and Mary as you walk in. Remus wants to figure out why you dislike him so, he desperately wants to change your sour opinion of him. He’s going to at least try to do so tonight, if you can stomach looking at him.

“C’mon losers,” James’ loud voice is unmistakable, “We’re playing seven minutes in heaven.”

Remus is only approaching when he hears your teasing,

“Are we taking a blast back to Year 9 Jamie?”

James nods, “Yeah we are, and would you look at that you and Lupin are up first.” You’re sure there’s an evil little grin on James’ face when you look up and find Remus standing there in his soft brown sweater and jeans.

You can smell a little of the cigarette he’d smoked before coming in, but mostly you smell his citrus, pepper and amber cologne.

It’s heady and you swear your brain gets a little drunk on it.

“Get going you two,” Sirius teases and you sigh standing.

Remus’ mind is reeling, wondering how he’s going to get back at Sirius and James and the rest of your friends that he knows are in on this too.

Out of ear shot of your friends as you both go to the nearest room, Remus says lowly, “You don’t have to come in. I’ll just tell them we talked.”

You look up at him, eyes wide and Remus takes your surprise as a moment to admire you up close. He counts three beauty marks near your right eye, another on your neck just under your chin, and one on your nose. He’s distracted by you for a good long while that he doesn’t register you’ve spoken till he sees you walk into the room and gesture for him to follow.

It’s tense, a silence neither of you are sure how to break.

You think Remus is the most gorgeous man to be placed on the Earth, and Remus thinks you find him repulsive.

You watch Remus climb onto the bed, his long legs crossed at the ankles as his back presses against the headboard.

His casualness makes him look even more attractive and while you’re aware that you’re staring at him, you can’t make yourself stop.

‘Now or never,’ he thinks to himself before asking, “Have I offended you somehow?”

There it is, laid open and bare. The question hangs in the air, like the most tantalising yet foreign fruit you’ve ever seen.

“No?” It comes out like a question. One Remus takes as a chance to explain.

“It’s just that you’re always talking or telling a story with the others, and as soon as I’m near earshot you go silent and you can’t meet my eyes. So I’ve been thinking that maybe I’ve offended you, and I just wanted to say sorry for if I did- directly or indirectly.”

Remus’ attractiveness has been upped by a thousand- you’re sure all the love deities are having a laugh at your hopelessness.

You can’t meet his eyes now, even as you sit on the bed, so close to him that your biceps brush each other’s. “You haven’t offended me.”

Your voice is much softer than he’s ever heard it. Remus thinks this must be the softest you’ve ever spoken in your whole life.

“I haven’t?” he asks and you shake your head. Hazarding a glance at him, you find Remus leaning his shoulder down, his chin tucked as his eyes roam your frame.

“N-no,” your stutter gives you away slowly. “You’re just different from the others.” It’s not a clearer explanation, but the gears are turning in Remus’ head all the same and you can tell.

“Different how?” Remus doesn’t want to assume anything and that’s what causes the gears to come to a screeching halt.

You sigh, fiddling with the hem of your skirt. Remus has never seen you this unsure. Everything you do is with confidence and ease, like you were just made to walk, talk and move the way that you do. Like it was as easy as breathing.

Maybe it’s the way you take your time to consider your words, or the way you fiddle with your clothes or even the way your breathing changes as he leans just a bit closer that makes Remus smile a little.

“Will you look at me for a second, darling gwerthfawr?” The softness of his tone and the way his accent changes to something a little more melodic makes you more jelly-like than you usually are in his presence.

“Hm?” you hum and Remus smirks. Silvery slithers of scar tissue moving with his mouth and making him look wicked in a way that has you falling a little more in love with him.

“Why don’t you like looking or speaking to me?”

Remus doesn’t let you turn away, doesn’t let you tuck your cheek to your shoulder as you deliberate what you want to say. No, instead, the menace holds your chin and stares at you, holding your gaze and making your brain cloud even more as his cologne and attention wash over you.

“I like looking at you,” you admit shyly, the confession coming from your lips with hesitation. Like Remus will be repulsed by the fact that you like looking at him. “But you make me nervous.”

The words are suspended in the quiet of the room. All there is the muffled sounds of the party going on in the living room, and then yours and Remus’ breathing.

“I make you nervous?”

Sirius and James burst through the door, wide smiles that turn into shocked smirks at your positions.

“Well love birds, sorry but your seven minutes are up.” Remus staggers in letting your chin go, but when his fingers slacken, you leave the room, belly in knots in the almost wordy confession.

“So, how’d that go?” James asks him as you bend the corner- he’s sure that Lily and the other girls will be doing the same with you.

Remus flops on the bed, “Nothing that concerns you two gits.” His mind is racing with possibilities of finishing this conversation.

Sirius boos, “After all that planning to get you two in here and snogging each other’s faces off, that’s the thanks we get?” Walking out with James who’s shaking his head.

“But you make me nervous,” repeats in his head for days. He’s not dense by a mile, but Remus has a hard time figuring out what about him makes you nervous.

Sure he’s tall and a little serious, but he’s not as intimidating as he’d first thought Sirius was. Remus doesn’t want to turn to his friends, sure they’d tease him endlessly for being ‘thick,’ and then more than likely tell you and that would just make you even more nervous to look or speak to him at the very least.

What Remus does do, is consult the best person he knows that will give him impartial advice; books.

There’s always a book for any occasion, so he delves deep. Behavioural analysis books, books on people with social anxiety (which he doesn’t think you have because it’s just him that gets the selective mutism) and even at the end of it, he turns to romance novels. Something must stand out.

It comes to a head when Remus comes to the library when you’re busy typing away at your essay. You feel the presence, the warmth of his pepper and amber cologne as he pulls the seat out beside you.

Remus doesn’t say a word as he sits down. Instead, he pulls out his laptop and begins typing at the same essay prompt you’re working on.

You’re hyper aware of everything he’s doing- every breath, every sigh, every harsh backspace and enter.

Remus doesn’t seem to be half as affected as you are and it has you whispering, “What are you doing here, Remus?”

He hums, tapping his forefinger near the touchpad. He finishes his sentence and then turns to you. “Working on that essay due tomorrow.”

You frown, lips pulled downwards as you think of your next words. “You know what I mean, why are you sitting beside me?”

Remus sighs, head hanging off the back of the chair. “I want you to not be nervous around me anymore. I also want to know why I make you nervous.”

You swallow, mouth suddenly dry.

Remus turns to look at you and the amber lighting of the library makes his skin look sunkissed and supple. His honey and sage eyes blink owlishly at you, no sign of rushing you along for an answer.

That was something you had learnt while silently watching Remus. He’s always actually listening- not just listening to respond.

“Because,” you start, eyes darting all over his face in search of any insecurity in it. “You always seem so hyper focused on what it is I’m going to say next and it flusters me.”

Remus’ face morphs into a smile, his lazy expression from before melting away as his eyes warm to your embarrassed whisper.

“So it’s not dislike?” He asks, hands itching to tip your chin up like he had the other night.

“Are you going to make me say it out loud?”

“Poor girl,” he feels much more confident now. Now that he knows for sure that you don’t hate him and that you might actually like him as much as he likes you, he can be a little more flirty.

His hand reaches for your wrist, thumb running back and forth around your pulse.

You scowl, more than a little bashful to have exposed your feelings to Remus. He doesn’t mind.

No, Remus feels over the moon. Enough so that his hand moves from your wrist and his forefinger hooks under your chin so you’re making eye contact again.

“I like you too. Just as much,” it’s his turn for a whispered confession and you hope to all hell that he can’t feel the thundering of your pulse. “Maybe more.”

You feel your body buzz under his attention. Remus leans in closer, “Let me take you out after this? We can go somewhere quiet and have a proper ‘first’ conversation.”

#remuslupin #remus lupin #remus lupin one shot #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin fic #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x black!reader #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x yn #remus lupin x loud but shy!reader

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cosmal · 1 year

Text

𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐑𝐨𝐜𝐤 — 𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐮𝐬 𝐋𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐧

summary — you and remus lupin have become really good at stealing each other away from parties.

or but if you're too drunk to drive and the music is right, she might let you stay but just for the night....she might want a kiss before the end of this song.

warnings/tags — fem!afab!reader, she/her pronouns, modern!au, friends to lovers, absolute idiots in love, mutual pining, oblivious!reader, oblivious!remus, drunk!reader, drunk!remus, alcohol consumption

note — this is inspired by lovers rock by tv girl!!! i think this is the longest thing i've ever written. I do very much like it as of right now. that'll probably change in a week.

word count — 12.4k

“Thank Godric, you’re here,” Mary groans from her position on the front porch, Marlene leaning into her side. Both are clearly enjoying a cigarette away from the din of the party. You can tell what type of night it’s going to be already. Not that you’ve arrived two hours late anyway.

“I’ve never seen you so happy to see me, Mary,” you giggle, crossing the threshold of Sirius’s front lawn, careful not to trip on his collection of stolen garden gnomes.

“I’m always happy to see you, lovely.” She extends her hand, the cigarette between her lovely red nails on offer.

“You know who’s going to be even happier?” Marlene coughs, as you take the smoke thankfully, taking a few calming puffs.

You pretend like you have any idea who she’s referring to, “Jamie? Haven’t seen him in a while. Miss that boy,” you laugh, voice strained through the thick smoke you exhale.

“No, you idiot.” Mary pipes up and you hand the smoke back, “Remus. He hasn’t shut up about you all night.”

“That’s if he’s sober enough to even notice you’re here,” Marlene laughs and so does Mary. You smile, small enough to not show how happy you actually are that you get to see him. It’s been too long.

“He’s drinking?”

“Absolutely hammered. We were hoping you’d get here earlier so he wouldn’t drink too much. Please go look after him.” Mary throws her arm around Marlene and she snuggles in closer. They both look content enough to fall asleep right there in the cool summer breeze.

“I’m sure he’s doing okay.”

“I’m sure he will be when you get inside.”

You move to toe your shoes off at the front mat, kicking them away so they’re not a tripping hazard.

“When has Sirius ever done that at your house, Y/N?” Mary laughs, looking down at your socked feet

“Oh, no. This is for me. Don’t want to get my shoes dirty.” You laugh when you grab the handle of the flyscreen, swinging the door open.

The girls’ laughter becomes a distant murmur when you enter the kitchen, met with mostly everyone sitting around the dining table. A deal of cards in everyone’s hands, and piles of coins and sweets sat in the middle.

James and Lily laughing and glowing under the downcast of the orange lighting, appearing to seemingly be winning. Sirius and Frank having their own side bets, throwing coins around before both calling tails. Then, there's Remus. You try to ignore the hitch in your breath when your eyes land on the sandy-haired boy.

He really does look drunk, eyes droopy but still bright when he hiccups a laugh at something James says. A quiet, airy chuckle that has his mouth creasing and eyelashes kissing his cheeks. A smile so pretty, you have to fight your own.

His head is propped up on the table by an elbow that looks like it’s about to slip off the edge, so you sneak up behind him and place your hand against his arm to stop him from falling face-first into the wood.

He looks up at you, a little startled for a second, and you can see the moment it clicks in his head when he realises who he’s looking at. He smiles, all surprised but content and you melt. The last time you had seen him was only for the third time ever at another one of Sirius’s parties. You hate to admit that the only thing you look forward to now is when you receive an invite from your workmate and you have another excuse to see his lanky best friend.

“Y/N! When did you get here?” Sirius chants, flicking his last remaining coin at Frank. He shoots him a well-deserved glare.

“About thirty seconds ago,” you smile.

Sirius looks down at your socked feet and frowns, “You took your shoes off again. How many times do I have to tell you, you don’t have to do that.”

You roll your eyes, “You’re gross, Sirius.”

Remus looks down too, the top of his head pressing into your side, a crush of his curls tickling the bare skin of your arm and you almost shiver. “Cool socks.” Is the first thing he says to you. You giggle.

They’re a dark cornflower shade, moons scattered across the material at random. They crease when you wriggle your toes, “Thanks. Got them from mum for my birthday.”

“She has good taste.” He moves off of you, slouching down in his chair until his knees are pressing Lily’s legs.

His head lolls backwards, neck bared under the warm light. You think you feel dizzier than he does. Even when he squeezes his eyes shut.

“What have you done to him?” you laugh, hand flat against his forehead to brush away his loose hair. He keens, sighing deeply under a hiccup.

“He’s very awful at poker,” James laughs, flicking a pastille across the table. You look at his high pile, and then Sirius and Franks’ which are almost of equal height. Then you look in front of Remus, the table almost bare. You laugh.

“We like to play a little differently,” Franks states over the rim of his bottle.

“Basically, you take a shot every time you lose,” James says, sober as ever. You think maybe he hasn’t lost yet.

“And Remus has lost every hand,” Sirius adds to the chime of details.

“Have not!” Remus finally pipes up, finger pointed at James instead of Sirius, too distracted staring at the ceiling. “Frank lost the first.”

“Anyways, Moons. You just lost and I think you owe us another.”

Remus groans, but sits up to reach for the bottle of Sambuca sitting in the middle of the table. You gently swat his hand and push him back into his chair.

“I think you’ve had enough,” you say, turning to place the bottle on the kitchen bench, along with the empty bottles.

“C’mon, one more,” Remus giggles, making hands for the bottle in the air. A child, you think.

“Yeah, Y/N! One more!” Sirius agrees, smiling boyishly.

“You’ll make yourself sick,” you chide with a small frown. Remus slumps against you, much defeated. He might fall asleep on you if you stand there any longer. You poke his cheek where it’s pressed into your clothes.

“He already is sick.” Sirius is smug when he speaks and you fret about what else he’s about to say, “Sick in love.”

You laugh. Could’ve been worse. But it still has your heart skipping in your chest. You really do hope Remus shares the feelings you hold for him. But then again, Remus is drunk and Sirius, is well, he’s Sirius. Despite the name, he hardly ever is.

“Boo. Awful.” You frown in faux offence, ignoring him when he winks at you. Sickening, really.

You lean down so your mouth is in line with Remus’s ear, “You wanna go lay down?” You realise you’re in quite a predicament. Coming over to parties to see Sirius’s best friend. Looking after him when he’s drunk. You’d hoped he would do the same.

“Please, no sex in my house,” Sirius states, standing to grab another drink. James guffaws.

You roll your eyes, “He’s drunk.”

“So, you do want to have sex with him?” he adds.

You almost choke on your tongue, “No, it’s just. He- Stop it.” You have to stop yourself from saying something wrong. It wasn’t a lie, you did want to. But you wanted much more than that.

“Leave her alone,” Remus chides, leaning back off your stomach. “You’ll scare her off and I’ll never see her again,”

He was right, his friends did intimidate you. But you’d hoped it would take more than not yet warming up to them to get you to never see Remus again.

Remus stands and you’re surprised he doesn’t stumble when he takes your hand to lead you away from the table and out into the lounge room. You poke your tongue out over your shoulder when you hear James make some sort of crude comment to Frank. Lily smiles warmly at you as an apology.

He sits down with all the gracefulness of a baby elephant and you have to bite back a laugh. He looks up at you, pretty eyes all droopy and a lopsided smile, and you feel like you’ll never come back from these feelings ever.

Before you can overly admire him for too long, he’s patting the space next to him with a floppy hand. “C’mon.”

You oblige probably too willingly, flopping yourself down next to him with a small oomph, your thigh pressing into his. He shuffles down the lounge to rest his head atop your shoulder, neck craned a little to reach it. You can’t find it in yourself to mind. His face is warm and it presses into your collarbone that’s peeking from out the top of your shirt. His light stubble tickles your skin and it’s weirdly soothing. God, you know you’re in deep.

“You smell good.”

You breathe in subconsciously, “You do, too.”

Under the strong scent of stale beer and sambuca, you can think you can discern a hint of his cologne. Woody and something like cinnamon. Mixed in with the light scent of his laundry detergent, like fresh linen and lavender. He's dizzying.

“I smell like beer,” he groans, hand finding its way between both of your thighs, your skirt tangled in his fingers.

“You smell nice,” you laugh.

You watch the doorway where James gets up to turn the dial on the vinyl player. The current song now loud enough to be heard where you’re sitting.

Humming along, you say, “I love this song.”

Remus gawps, “Me too. S’my favourite, actually.”

Remus having the exact same favourite song as you makes your head spin. “No way.”

“Yes way.” he smiles. If he were soberer, you’d gush to him over this. It’d have to wait.

He shifts his head from your shoulder and startles for a moment, eyebrows raised, “I didn’t even ask if you wanted a drink.” You get whiplash from the change of subject.

You sigh, very amused at his intent to be nice to you, despite being half-cut, “I’m okay. I wasn’t really planning on drinking tonight.”

He frowns, wrinkles his nose and you want to kiss it. God. “Why did you come, then?” The fact he thinks you came to get drunk and not just to see him makes you want to laugh.

The smile you’re still trying to fight every time he speaks makes your cheeks ache, “To see Sirius.”

He frowns even more and you think he wants to shift away from you. He roughly scratches at his face and you almost regret messing with him.

“Sirius?” He hiccups.

“I’m kidding.” You poke his bicep, “I came to see you.”

There’s a silence and then Remus is breaking out into one of the biggest grins you’d ever seen. You’d have the decency in you to blame it on being drunk. Nothing else.

“Me?” He hiccups, again. You place your hand atop his thigh and trace the thick seam of his pants.

“Yes, you.”

His smile dials back but doesn’t fade and his face relaxes. He leans down to place his head back against your shoulder, cheek all smooshed.

“Oh.”

“Oh?”

“Thank you.” he hums, hooking his elbow behind yours, completely squished against you. He thinks you must be cold in a skirt and a small T-shirt. “I like it when you’re here. You make it bearable.”

You want to accept his compliment, but when he hiccups for the third time, you remember he’s drunk. “That’s a bit mean, Remus. Will I tell your friends you can’t bear them?”

Remus stiffens and you stop rubbing his leg. Drunk Remus is very gullible. Sweet, but gullible all the same.

“Stop it. You know what I mean.” He pushes further into your shoulder and you feel yourself dip down against him, head almost falling against his. You wouldn’t mind if it did, but it wouldn’t be very comfortable, you assume.

“I don’t think I do,” you tease and Remus pinches your side, which results in a stifled yelp.

“Don’t be cruel.” He strains.

“I would never.”

When you shiver in your spot, Remus wonders what your answer would be if he offered you his jacket. He thinks he should test his theory.

“Are you cold?” he asks but doesn’t move his head from your shoulder.

“A little,” you yawn. Which then causes Remus to yawn. You laugh animatedly.

“Do you,” Remus blinks slowly, eyelashes kissing his cheeks as he attempts to keep his eyes open. “do you want my jacket?”

You’re glad Remus’ head is still propped on your shoulder lest he sees the blush creeping across your cheeks. Drunk Remus is gullible. But drunk Remus is still just as kind as he is when he’s sober.

“Then you’ll be cold,” you reply, giving his thigh a squeeze. You crane your neck to look at him. He looks tired.

“Better me than you.” He moves to take it off and before he can even get one arm out, you sit forward and place your hands on his chest. Fingers twisted in his cotton shirt, your turned knee pressing into his.

“Remus, I’m okay.” You give him your most reassuring smile. Being cold is no one’s fault but your own. You don’t want to be an annoyance.

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

Remus sits back, albeit begrudgingly, hands wrapped around the zipper of his jacket. The further he pushes back into the lounge, the more he looks like he’s about to fall asleep.

“Remus?” you murmur. Voice quiet under the din of the party. Sirius is a loud drunk, his laughter roaring at something stupid James is doing.

His head begins to dip into the edge of the cushion, headed for the arm of the chair. If he kept this up, he’d have a crick in his neck in no time.

He hums and you pat his cheek to encourage him to sit up. It’s bemusing how quickly he can drift off. You’re very envious. Maybe it’s just the alcohol.

“What’s up?” he murmurs in return, peeking from one eye, the other scrunched up. He’s adorable and you’re in too deep.

“You seem tired.” You poke his face this time and he beams, all warm and dozey under the mellow light of Sirius’s living room. A line of curls falling into his eyes and the apples of his cheeks a tinge of peach.

He hums again, much thicker than last. “M’not.”

You hold out your hand, all five fingers spread. “How many fingers am I holding up?”

He struggles, but pulls his hand from his lap and holds it up to yours, tangling your fingers. Palm flush against yours and much warmer in comparison. “Feels like five.” He pulls your entwined hands back down and you laugh.

You try not to shy from his actions, pretending like it doesn’t make your heart skip, and then almost stop completely when his thumb rubs circles into the top of your hand. You can feel the warmth seeping from his into your own and your fingertips tingle.

“Do you want to go home?” You twist so you’re completely on the edge of the lounge, hand still wrapped in his. You stop, “Or are you staying here tonight?”

He brings his arm up - with yours still tangled - and rubs his face with the back of his hand. Dragging you up and down. You giggle at his tired actions before pouting.

“I think.'' You can tell he’s trying to stay alert enough to hold a conversation with you.

When he wakes up in the morning he won’t remember being so tired here and will think you both had the best conversation. You’ll be okay with this. “I think Sirius was supposed to take me home, but he’s too drunk now.”

“You’ll sleep on the couch?” You frown and he blinks.

“I think I might have to.” He throws his head back and sighs. Strained and raspy.

You look at the size of Sirius’s two-seater and then Remus’s stupidly long legs. It wouldn’t work, and he’d end up with either a sore back or a worse-off neck than whatever it was he was doing right now. You don’t even really think before you say, “I can walk you home.”

Remus looks a little more alert, “You can’t sleep on this.” You prod the squeaky leather and it bounces back with absolutely no recoil. You’ll be sure to scold Sirius next time for having a horrendous couch, though enough money to buy everyone in the room ten of them. You know he won’t appreciate the exaggeration. But it’s for the sake of his friends’ backs.

“You don’t have to do that.” He sits up properly now and tries to situate himself to look convincingly comfortable. “I’ll make do.”

“It’s no big deal.” You shrug. “I’m walking home anyways.”

Now he’s sitting forward, his knees pushing into your leg and you almost stumble off the seat, grabbing his arm for purchase. “You just got here.” He almost frets and then coughs to hide his worry. He’s not very good at achieving a smooth, cool demeanour when half-cut. Not that he ever achieves it sober, he thinks.

“No, but I think you need to go home and sleep.” You look out into the kitchen that’s now surprisingly quieter. Lily looks like she’s about to fall asleep, leaning on James’s shoulder, who’s trying to play a horrible game of go fish with Sirius and Frank. Absolute party animals.

“I live too far away, anyways,” he says, leaning down to tie his shoelaces. “You’ll have to walk me home and then walk back, you’ll be walking for at least an hour and a half.” Why Remus is so afraid to suggest you can stay the night at his, he doesn’t know.

You squeeze his shoulder as he struggles to loop his lace through his fingers. He decides to go for the simpler, bunny-ear option. “That’s okay. You can stay at mine. I only live ten minutes away.”

When Remus sits back up after tying his laces too tight, his face is pink.

Remus Lupin has never been one for sitting comfortably, ever. With long, lanky limbs, he always has his legs sprawled out and his arms thrown over something. Anything he can take up comfortably, with enough space to spread, he’ll sit willingly.

On one hand, he’s thankful you convinced him not to sleep on Sirius’s couch. He didn’t need a repeat of New Year’s. Though, on the other hand, he could’ve made do.

Nothing was like sitting in your bedroom. He wouldn’t say he was uncomfortable, though deep down he was a little, a pit of anxiety creeping up his chest. He felt like he had little room to move - despite you owning a double bed - because he didn’t want to look stupid. He could take up space and not notice it.

Remus has trouble not taking in every detail he can in your room. Like your little trinket dishes filled with miscellaneous items, signet rings and seashells. The stuffed rhino toy in the middle of your pillows that you had told him - shyly at that - was named Clarence. Not before giggling at the poster of Twilight that you swore had been there since you were young. Your current read splayed open on the end of your bed, along with the stack of records in a blue milk crate in the corner, were things he promised himself he would ask you about when he wasn’t half tipsy and could hold a proper conversation.

In his admiration, one that was making his anxiety spread into warmth that seemed to be seeping from his bones. He’s too busy pretending like he isn’t taking in every small detail one shouldn’t when they’ve only known someone for only a month, and doesn’t notice that you’ve changed.

He looks over at you, in a pair of shorts littered with tiny daisies and a shirt that almost eats said shorts. Your hair pulled back and your face still sort of wet from where you obviously washed off the day's grime, causing the hairs around your face to curl. He doesn’t know if it’s the fading alcohol that’s causing him to hiccup even more, or if it’s seeing you all fresh and content from being at home that has his breath catching.

Remus Lupin is still a little drunk but he is also quite clearly growing to like you even more. That doesn’t change. He thinks he's done everything backwards. Meeting you, then seeing you now but too inebriated to say something redeeming, and then seeing you in the comfort of your own home before he even gets to ask you on a date. He also thinks he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Remus?” Your voice is as calm as you look when you speak and he melts.

“Hm?” He blinks, shaking his head.

“You okay?” Warm light washes over you and paints you amber as you patter across the room, the moon socks that are still on your feet pressing into the white fabric of your rug. “You’re not feeling sick?” He thinks he should blame his daze on a fake sickness, but he doesn’t want you to worry even more, so he decides against it.

When you press the back of your hand to his cheek, that’s only warm because he’s a little overwhelmed, not because he’s feeling poorly, he can’t find it in himself to hold your gaze. “I’m okay.”

“I was saying I don’t think I have any clothes for you to change into.” You remind him after it felt like you were talking to a brick wall a minute earlier.

Remus pushes his hands into the rough material of his black jeans. He doesn’t see himself sleeping in anything else. “That’s okay.”

“You’re not going to sleep in those are you?”

What else would he sleep in if you have no other clothes? “Uh.”

“You wear boxers?” you grin.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do.” He wishes he was still a little drunker so he could blame his bumbling words on the effects of downing half a bottle of sambuca. Now he’s realising that’s just how he sounds when he’s overwhelmed by you.

“Sleep in those. I don’t mind.”

Your confidence, and your confidence only, is how he ends up pantless and under the covers of your bed. He doesn’t feel uncomfortable at all. You have a lovely way of making him feel at ease. He thinks that’s why he likes you so much.

You smell different than earlier in the night when your shirt tickles his arm. Like fresh face wash and night creams, and maybe even roses. He’d hate to think of what he smelt like in comparison to you. Probably still like beer, and maybe like sweat. He should’ve asked if he could’ve showered. That might’ve been too much, he’s definitely overthinking.

“You’re very quiet,” you say into the dimness of your room. He’s lucky your bedside lamp is so muted, lest you see the goosebumps raised over his skin and how his cheeks haven’t returned to their normal colour since he crossed the threshold of your room.

“M’thinking,” he returns, just as quiet. It feels wrong to disturb the calmness blanketing the room.

“I can tell.” He can hear you grin, “What about?”

He swallows and he wouldn’t be surprised if you heard it, “You.”

You huff a small laugh and push down into the pillow behind you, “Me?” Your voice is a little strained, and not louder than before. Maybe even quieter.

“Yeah. Thinking about the next time I’ll get to see you.”

“You haven’t even left yet and you’re thinking ahead to the next time we’ll see each other,” you tease, getting comfortable underneath your plush quilt and sheets. Probably too much for a summer night but there’s still a chill in the air, flowing through your open window.

“I’m just hoping I won’t be so drunk,” he admits, hating how he still actually does sound drunk.

“Hopefully,” you smile, “But that’s okay, we can blame it on James.”

“If only I wasn’t so shit at poker,” he laughs in a strained and animated voice, trying to hold back a yawn.

He finally gets comfortable, hands fisting the sheets around his body and head balancing restfully against the plush of your ivory pillows.

You can see his eyes flutter in an attempt to stay awake. You think it’s endearing but you also think he needs to sleep. “Remus,” you say, firm but caring at once.

“Hmm?” he mumbles, eyebrows pinched.

“You should sleep.” You push itchy locks away from his forehead and he sighs at the caring touch of your fingers.

“Don’t wanna.” He scrunches his nose, “I think I’m finally sobering up. Wanna talk t’you.”

You smile at his absolute urgency and think he’s adorable. Truly. “Please, sleep. We’ll talk in the morning.”

“You’ll be here?” This, you actually laugh at.

“Of course, Remus. You’re in my room.”

He closes his eyes, eyelashes kissing the freckles of his cheeks and his tired, darkened skin, “M’kay.”

When you wake up in the morning, almost midday, Remus plagued by the effects of alcohol, you too content to wake whilst being next to him, you both have separate texts from Sirius.

Your own chat log reads, aren’t U glad you came out? You don’t reply, not wanting to encourage him in any way.

Remus’s phone, on the other hand, reads,

uncle pads has a ring to it don’t you think? xxxx

He does in fact reply, too used to Sirius being a twat.

Nothing happened. Ur disgusting and I hate you.

what do U mean nothing happened?

I was drunk. She helped me basically stumble home.

U both stumbled. in her sheets.

Fuck off. Idiot.

Neither of you mention any of Sirius’s messages to each other the entire morning. Too busy enjoying each other's company.

The week spent after Remus had drunkenly stayed the night, you could pleasantly, though maybe even with a smidge of embarrassment, admit that he was all you thought about since.

It was a new feeling. You’d never felt it before. The endearment, but also the nerves, of realising you actually like someone. Some days it made your cheeks ache from smiling, and filled your chest with warmth. On other days, the warmth cracked your chest open, an aching chasm pleading to be filled and a head clouded with apprehension.

You were eager and scared all at once. But you were happy either way because Remus made you feel things. Good things.

You had spent the morning, forcing him to eat something, telling him it would make his hangover feel much better. He’d argued for no longer than two minutes before agreeing. Saying, who am I to argue with a girl like you?

“Like me?” you’d replied, mouth full of half-eaten pancake, pushing his own plate across the marble of your kitchen bar.

“Smart,” he smiled, picking at a blueberry, “Pretty.”

And after it was your turn to babble like a fool, he’d eased you open. Asked you about the record collection in your room (he was proud of himself for remembering). You’d rambled off your favourite artists, a lot similar, and he knew he’d be an idiot if he didn’t give you his number before he left.

And he did. Wrote his number on your hand as you stood at your doorway and he thanked you for breakfast. And for walking him home, drunk. You kissed his cheek and watched him press his fingers into his skin until he rounded the corner.

You wrote the number down on a piece of paper, magnetising it to your fridge as soon as you shut the door. Though your hands were sweaty - obviously because you were around Remus - and the last number had smudged. Was it a 3? Or an 8? Or a weird looking 5? You couldn’t tell and told yourself that was a problem you could deal with later.

It was later. A whole week later and you still hadn’t called him. If it was due to your nerves or the fact you had a missing number, that was your business only. You left the last space blank, the empty spot a blinding reminder of your stupidity. You’d just have to try every number until you found Remus. It would take no more than ten attempts.

Numbers zero through four were all wrong numbers. You were only met with a piercing tone before the line went dead. When you got to five, you were met with, what sounded like, a grumpy old lady. You tried to hang up straight away, well aware it wasn’t him, but she screeched and persisted that if she had a prank call one more time, she would phone the police!

Turns out, it was a 6 after all. The lovely tone of Remus’s voice rings down the line and you sigh in relief.

“It’s you.” Your voice is airy and Remus isn't sure he knows who it is.

There are only a handful of people who have his number. His friends, most of them called and checked in regularly, except Mary, who's always one to stop by instead. His parents and his neighbour had it too. But he seriously doubted the latter, unless his flat had been ransacked.

And then he remembers he'd given it to you and he laughs. All these thoughts happen within the span of two seconds. He hopes it's you, he's been anticipating a call all week. He was beginning to maybe think you didn’t actually want to hear from him. That he'd embarrassed himself in his drunken stupor. But then he remembered how nice you were to him.

You’ll make yourself sick.

“It is?” he laughs, still hoping it is in fact you. The image of his flat turned upside down, the spot on his mantle where his small TV is, now empty, flashes across his mind.

“Remus. It’s me!” you chirp and he pushes his phone closer to his ear as if it’ll make him hear your pretty voice even clearer.

”Me? I don’t think I know any me’s” he teases, fighting back an eager smile. Teasing you could be fun. Could become a constant. He’s imagining the warmth of your cheeks, and hopefully a small smile.

“Y/N,” you correct and he can almost hear the roll of your eyes.

“Oh. I know an Y/N,” he smiles, leaning against the lip of his kitchen bench. “She’s very pretty,” he pauses, wanting to drag it out, “and she’s super-”

“Remus,” you plead. Half wanting him to continue, half wanting him to stop to save your phone splitting in half where you’re holding it too hard. “Stop.”

Hearing your smile isn’t enough for him, “Super cool. Actually probably way too cool for me and…”

Remus sighs, very happy with himself.

“You done?” you ask.

“Maybe.”

“You’re a nuisance.”

Remus decides to not argue, you’re half right anyways. “I’m sorry. What’s up?”

You pause, thinking. You’ve forgotten why you called him for a moment. Too happy with just listening to him talk. You think you could do it all day if he let you. “I was wondering if you were coming out tonight? Drinks?” You feel silly asking now. It was drinks for James, he’d gotten a promotion, but of course, Remus is coming, they're best friends.

“Are you?”

You grin, “Yes. Yeah, I am.”

“Great. Me too.”

The excitement you feel when you know you’ll be seeing him again is palpable. Giddiness mixed with a number of nerves is always there whenever you think of him. He makes you feel like a schoolgirl again and you know he’ll be the cause of your undoing.

“Great.”

A face-splitting smile erupts across Remus’s features. If only you could see each other.

The amount of time you spend getting ready in the afternoon for James’s get-together is silly. After what's an almost stupid amount of time rustling through your closet to find something, the final thing you settle on you hope isn’t stupid. A red skirt that ends mid-thigh, a white tee and a leather jacket. Boots that you hope actually do your legs justice, not just how they look in the mirror.

You know exactly why you're making such a fuss with your appearance. Spending an extra amount of time making sure loose hairs are sprayed down and a fresh coat of nail polish that's applied probably a little too late before you make your way out your front door.

You think that maybe if you didn’t know if Remus was attending or not it'd be a lot easier on you. Or maybe worse. God, you're a mess. You just really want to make him like you.

Arriving at the pub a little early is probably a bad idea in the long run. You greet James and Lily with equal delight. You hadn’t seen them since his shindig at least two weeks ago. Sirius, pint in hand, greets you loud enough to let the entire pub know of your arrival. Frank and Alice are absent. In-laws. You feel as though you had finally found the perfect group of friends.

James had told you that Remus was probably going to be late.

Which gives you too much time to down an inappropriate number of vodka-cranberries, much to Sirius’s delight. Pressed into a corner booth, settled next to James and Sirius who have now also transitioned to fruity drinks.

When Remus finally arrives, the sun now set, you're at least five cocktails deep. The pub is a little loud now, though you’d never struggle to hear any of your rambunctious friends. They're probably half the noise. You're a giggling mess, warm from the effects of alcohol. You feel ridiculously happy like you expected to, but you haven’t even seen Remus yet.

When you sip back the last dregs of your drink, the rim pressed into your nose, determined not to waste a single drop, your eyes finally settle on Remus who's selfishly been admiring you from afar. Your eyes light up like a delighted puppy and he has to bite his tongue to stop himself from smiling like an idiot.

He walks to the edge of the table, wet and sticky wood pressing into his jeans and he grimaces. “Finally he arrives,” James cheers, mojito raised in the air.

“Moony! Looking as ravishing as ever, my boy!” Sirius cheers with equal flare.

Remus ignores both of them with a tiny smile, too used to their words it’s like second nature to ignore them. “Sweetheart,” he smiles at you and you light up even more.

“Remus! You’re here.”

Sirius gets up and slides along the wall to make room for Remus next to you, “He looks ravishing, wouldn’t you say, Y/N? Good enough to eat,” he repeats

“I am hungry,” you admit with a giggle as Remus settles down next to you, only enough room for a sheet of paper to fit between your thighs.

“Having a good time, lovely?” Remus gestures to the empty glasses taking up the table in front of you. Your lips are stained red and he has to lick his own.

“Amazing!” You lean into his side and your hair tickles his neck. Your warmth seeps through Remus’s skin and he doesn’t have a single problem with how close the two of you are sitting. He’d be kidding himself if he said he did.

“I’m glad,” he says, hands settling atop the table.

“Are you?” You blink, eyes bright and welcoming. He has to avert his attention to your nose instead. Feeling as if you’d swallow him whole.

“I am now,” he grins.

Distracted, the half-empty glass in your hands spills when you twist its stem a little too quickly. A puddle of cosmo seeps into the half-polished tabletop and you cringe.

“Oops.” Quick to act, despite how sapped you feel from the cocktails, you grab a too-big handful of napkins from the dispenser in front of you.

With little to no flare, you push the entire pile of paper into the split drink and probably make it worse. The napkins almost turn to pink sludge and you only spread the drink further. A cold, sticky mess.

Remus laughs and grabs your wrists, pulling them up from the mess, “What have you done, hmm?” He puts your hands in your lap and you slouch, defeated.

“Accident,” you huff. You watch Remus’s hands swipe across the table, much better at cleaning up your mess. Like it wasn’t even there in the first place.

Upset that your drink is now empty, when Sirius isn’t looking, too distracted talking quidditch with James, you reach forward and snatch his mojito. Cheering internally, too happy with yourself, you sip slowly.

“He won’t be too happy with that,” Remus laughs, pushing the serviettes to the side.

You shrug, pushing further into the leather of the booth seat, “Accident.” you repeat.

Remus chuckles. You scull back the last of Sirius’s drink and Remus braces his hand on the skin between your shoulder blades, with a gentle “Take it easy,”

You turn to him and wipe the line of drink from your chin with the back of your hand. Smiling before gently slamming the now-empty glass back to the table, a ring of condensation splashes across your palm.

You wipe it across Remus’s leg unthinkingly and he wrinkles his nose. A dark stripe up his thigh. He takes your hand by the wrist again and grabs another napkin. Dabbing your palm gently and you act unaffected by his attentions when you trace the water on the table with your free hand.

“Am I the one who’s going to be doing the babysitting, tonight?” Remus counts the glasses that hadn’t been collected yet. Five. Six, now counting the one you stole.

You nod, gleefully.

“Saves me, then.” Lily takes another swig from her Pimm's, very happy. James presses into her side and throws his head back.

“Merlin, I’m tired.” he huffs.

“Boo. No fun,” you pout, eyeing only his third drink that he hadn’t touched in way too long, “You drink too slowly, that’s your problem.”

He snorts, “I don’t have the drinking problems, lovely.”

You gasp, hand to your chest, sticky fingers pressing into your skin, “Just because I’m having fun!”

You notice the beginnings of a frown across Sirius’s face, clocking the glass in front of you, green to your past pink drinks, “You little sneak.”

You pout, “Okay, I’m sorry, let me get the next round.” You move to stand and when you’re upright, the room spins. You grab Remus’s shoulder for purchase and he grabs your forearm. His grip is grounding, flesh between his slender fingers.

“Okay, let me get the drinks,” he says, standing. The love-hate relationship you have with his height hurts sometimes.

“No, let me.” You rummage through the purse over your shoulder, through sickles and spare tampons, and pull out a measly fiver. You hold it up to him with a frown, paper crumpled in your hand.

Remus chuckles and places his hands on your shoulders, “Sit.”

You do what he says and ignore the warmth in the pit of your belly.

As Remus stands at the bar to wait for the drinks, he turns to watch you with a content smile on his face and a warmth spreading up his chest until it begs to swatch his cheeks. He watches as you cover your face with your hands, giggling madly at something James is telling you.

He thinks his heart is messing with him when it skips in his chest. When you throw your head back, neck bared and your eyes squinted, your shoulders raise like it’s the funniest thing you’ve ever heard (it could be but he doubts it), he thinks his heart has an actual fault. Almost halting completely when your eyes meet his and he thinks he’s been caught, but you smile contently and he has to look away before it jumps out his throat.

He knows he’s truly done for.

He returns with a tray of drinks, mojito’s for his friends and a pint for himself, a packet of crisps pinched between his teeth. If he doesn’t choose to drink cocktails with everyone else because he wants to be sober to keep his eye on you, that’s completely his business.

He places the drinks down, a hum of thank yous and cheers follow, he opens his mouth to let the crisps fall into your lap. You startle and look up at him, bemused.

“You said you were hungry.” He smiles.

You beam, hiccuping what he thinks is thanks.

“Where’s my fuckin food?” Sirius calls, voice very clear above the din of the pub. He throws a cube of ice at Remus and misses.

“Up your ass.”

Sirius goes to reach for a crisp and you clutch the foil bag close to your chest. He doesn’t try again, thinking you might bite him. “Fuck, I need a cig.”

He stands and stops Remus from sitting as he climbs over you. Squeezing past with almost zero care. You laugh, he seems hangry.

When he almost steps on your toe, “Look out, you prat.” Remus scolds.

“C’mon. Outside.” Sirius drags him away before he can even protest.

“You gonna ask her out, or what?” Sirus leans against the wall of the smoking area and flicks his ash.

Remus groans, “Don’t say it like it's easy or some shit.”

“Is it not?” Sirius laughs like it’s obvious. Remus envies his natural charm some days. He wished it came easy to him.

“No. She doesn’t like me like that.” Remus toes the gravel beneath his boot with a crunch. Watches as it skips across the ground and to the firepit. A distraction from the scolding that he’s expecting he’s about to get from Sirius.

Sirius coughs on a thick exhale of smoke, pushes himself off the wall. “You’re fucking with me, right?”

“What? No.” In some delusional, fucked up way, no, Remus is fucking with Sirius. Not since 7th year, anyways.

“She's mad about you,” Sirius laughs around the filter of his cigarette, “It’s sickening really. I mean she’s gotta be half dumb or something.” After another exhale he flicks more ash to the ground.

“Fuck up.”

“Whatever.”

There’s a beat before Remus says, “She doesn’t feel that way about me.” His head rests against the red brick behind him and wishes it would swallow him up. He wishes this was easier.

“What, you think she wears her best red skirt for people she doesn’t love?”

He lifts his head and glares at Sirius, “You really are a fucking twat, you know?” He steals the cigarette from between Sirius’s fingers and ignores his grunt as he inhales deeply. As deep as he can until Sirius swats his hand.

“I’m fucking kidding.” He takes it back, grimacing at the butt of what’s left.

“Still a twat,” Remus grunts.

Sirius flicks the orange filter to the ground and squashes it under his leather boot. “Seriously, Moons. Make a move already, it’s starting to get sad.”

He sighs, and Sirius almost wants to slap some sense into him. He doesn’t, remembering how he’d reacted last time he did. “I can’t. I’m not ruining anything.”

He decides to pat his shoulder instead, a gentler approach, “You’re a miserable sap.” He squeezes his sad friend, “She likes you, a lot, and she’s really good for you, y’know?”

“She is, isn’t she?” Remus sighs, lovelorn and dizzy, “Fuck, she’s so amazing. I don’t know what I’m gonna do. Have you seen her when she laughs? Fuck sakes.” He has to stop himself before he rants too much.

The both of them start to make their way back into the pub. “Alright, put your fucking cock away.”

Remus opens the door to the bar, “Get inside,” he laughs.

“If you don’t make a move soon, fuck I might.” Remus’s face goes slack and he pushes his dickhead of a friend towards their table with a little too much force. He stumbles with a hearty chuckle.

Left alone in the middle of the bar, a little incensed, he turns to look around and spots what looks like your aforementioned red skirt, standing in front of the claw machine.

Bemused, but more intrigued, he beelines for you with slow strides. When he stands behind you he places his hand to your shoulder. You turn around and smile warmly. You’re standing, more like swaying, with both hands inside your purse.

“What are you doing, dove?” he asks and squeezes your shoulder. You push back into him, probably for the stability you lack. He braces you with his thigh behind yours.

“You smell like a chimney.” You wrinkle your nose and he laughs. It reverberates through your chest and you have to blink away the way it makes you feel. Sleepy.

“Sirius is a horrible influence,” he says with an equally wrinkled nose.

“I’m looking for a coin,” you answer his question, looking back down into your purse. “Want to win you something.” Remus’s heart swells tenfold.

Before he can pull one from his pocket as an offering, you bend over and tip your entire purse to the paisley carpet, contents spilling everywhere. Wizard money, bright pink tampons, chapsticks and gum wrappers sit in a pile and Remus steps back with a disgruntled sigh.

You turn and crouch down to sort through everything, Remus looks down and gawps for a second. Half amused, half displeased. He bends down with you and helps as well.

“Do you think it'll take sickles?” you question, moving bandaids to the side. It’s looking like a lost cause.

Remus shakes his head with a laugh, “I don’t think so, honey.”

You frown.

“Here,” He handles a few items and places them in your purse, “I’ll help you clean this up and I’ll win you something, hm?” Remus thinks you’re a bit like Mary Poppins with how much stuff you have. He’d say this to you because you probably would understand the muggle reference, but you seem too upset over your lack of coins.

“Was gonna win you some chocolate,” you laugh, picking up more stuff.

The last few items fall back in with little organisation and he stands. You take his outstretched hands and let him gently tug you back up with a ruffle of your hair.

He pulls a coin from his pocket and slots it into the machine. You stand around to the side with your hands pressed to the glass like a little kid. The flow of colours washes you fluorescent as you point to a cherry ripe in a perfect spot.

He grips the joystick and moves it to where he thinks it hovers right above it.

“More to the left,” you say with your finger smooshed against the machine.

“You’re drunk,” he says before he pushes the red button on top of the stick, not moving it to where you’d said.

You laugh as it doesn’t even graze the chocolate. Claw coming back up with nothing. “Whatever.” He has two more chances at grabbing it and he’s determined.

The second time he does listen to you but still misses by the width of a hair. You both hold your breath as the claw gets lowered for the final time. You bend over to get a better view and watch as it gets picked up, not cheering until it gets dropped in the chute.

You clap as Remus cheers, taking the chocolate thankfully, opening it immediately with a crinkle of red foil. “Thank you, Remus.”

“Anytime.”

You break the chocolate in half and offer him the bigger portion. You both stand there, chewing on cherry and coconut and chocolate. You look at your sticky fingers and the worst of the after-effects of six cocktails suddenly hits you in a wave of nausea. Not enough to make you want to throw up, but enough for you to groan and grab your stomach.

“I think I should go home,” you whine, placing your half of the chocolate back into the wrapper and into your purse, probably just to melt and make a mess. A later problem, you think.

“Feeling okay?” he asks, turning to check you over. Etebrows pinched in concern already.

“I think I had too many cocktails,” you laugh, weakly at that.

“How are you getting home?” he asks.

You laugh, having flashbacks to your last encounter. “That’s my line.”

“It’s a good one.”

“I don’t know how I’m getting home,” you say.

“I’ll call you a taxi.”

You sigh, “That’d be lovely.”

After saying goodbye to the rest of the group, after they’d moaned about your fifteen-minute disappearance with Remus, Thought you’d gotten stuck in the cubicle! James had laughed. Drunkenly, you’d missed the joke. Remus had smacked him up the back of the head. But now, the both of you were making your way to the front entrance.

Remus has to drag you out the door, holding you upright as you stammer and trip on things that aren't there.

“Be careful,” he tuts, holding you closer under his arm.

“There was a frog!” you explain, very much exasperated.

“No there wasn’t,” he laughs.

“Was so!” you strain, fisting his shirt behind his back, sure to stretch the cotton.

“You just want me to hold you tighter.” He’s smug when he says it and can’t really help it. He has Sirius’s words ringing in the back of his head.

You stop at the gutter and kick a stone with your boot, “Maybe.”

Your knees ache, wanting nothing more than to crouch down to the ground. You think it would probably be a bad idea. Though with sore knees and a spinning head, bad ideas turned to the best.

You pull yourself from Remus' hold and bend your legs to crouch in the gutter. Remus’s eyes blow wide and he looks down at you. Not again, he thinks.

Before he can ask what you’re doing, thinking you've passed out, you look up, “Head rush,” you giggle with a huff of air. He sits down next to you, knees almost pressed into his chin.

Remus tugs your knee so you turn towards him, legs pressed together. He keeps his large palm over your thigh because being crouched in a gutter leaves little to the imagination to the drunks walking past and he’s not going to ask you to get up if you’re dizzy.

“You okay?” he murmurs.

You rest your head on his shoulder much like he had the last time you saw him. He hopes he had more care than you do with your cheek cruelly smooshed into his skin. “I’m just a little drunk.”

Lucky for Remus, before he thinks you’re about to fall asleep on his shoulder, your taxi is pulling up. He helps you stand, opens the back door and ushers you in.

Listening to your murmur of thanks Remus before he clicks you in.

“What’s your address, dove? So I can tell the driver.” You give him your address and he passes it off.

Before he can close the door for you, you grab his wrist.

“When can I see you next?” you ask brightly. Hopefully.

“Call me when you’re not hungover,” he laughs, brushing his fingers across your arm. Your grip hardens.

“You’ll answer?” He almost laughs again at how drunk you sound. Of course, he’ll answer.

“Of course, sweetheart.”

You lean across your seat, seatbelt pulling taut as you press a kiss to his cheek. Warm and buttery-soft just like last time, but maybe even worse now that his feelings for you are stronger. It burns.

“Thank you, Remus.”

“That’s okay, lovely.”

You in fact did call Remus, a couple of days after your night out. Expected, you were hungover so you waited a day after to talk.

Remus hadn’t really been expecting you to call him, despite how eager you seemed, he had talked himself out of believing you had any feelings for him. Like he’d imagined it or something.

So, when his phone rings, he’s not expecting it to be you at all. He answers with a sigh, thinking it’s James or Sirius.

“What do you want?” His voice is void of any excitement or joy you’d been selfishly expecting. You were also expecting a more welcoming greeting.

“Remus?” you say, and his hand stills in his cupboard where he’s distractedly putting clean dishes away.

He shuts the cupboard’s door a little too abruptly and cringes, clears his throat so he can speak, “Y/N! Shit, sorry. Hey.” He cringes even more at his stupidity.

“Expecting someone else?” you laugh.

He nods like you can see him, “Yeah, sorry.” He swallows and tries to fix himself, “How are you?”

“I’m good,” you say with a little sigh, “Really, really good.”

“That’s great!”

“Yeah, how are you?” you question.

Remus’s voice goes quieter, “Amazing.” Then there’s a small beat like you’re both thinking, “So, what’s up? Everything okay?”

In his mind, his stupid, paranoid mind, there’s a possibility that all you’ve done is pocket-dialled him. Or, accidentally pressed his name in your contacts, maybe mistaken the name Moony for Mum.

Is his name Moony in your phone? Or is it just Sirius’s friend? God, he wants his thoughts to shut up.

“I wanted to ask you something!” When it sounds like you actually want to talk to him, what almost feels like relief washes over him. Paints him bright as he settles on his sofa, beaming like a schoolboy when he says,

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah!” Your excitement is dizzying. “Are you free this weekend?”

He has to swallow before he speaks, eagerness bleeds through his skin. His foot taps and he picks at a loose thread on his battered shirt. “Yeah, I am.”

You chirp a happy noise, “Awesome! Cool. Um, there’s that gig on at The Red Lion if you wanted to come?”

Remus doesn’t see himself as a cool person and it definitely doesn’t show when he says, “Yeah! I’d love to.” in a tone pitched higher than normal.

“Great. I think Sirius is coming too, I told him about it the other day and said he should invite the others. I wasn’t sure if he had asked you yet.”

Oh.

Remus feels like the biggest idiot ever. You weren’t asking him out, why would you?

He leans down between his legs until all the air is forced from his lungs, he covers the receiver with his hand and groans, long and suffering in self-pity.

Is coughing to clear your throat and hide your disappointment a good thing? Because his voice is a little squeaky when he replies. When he sits back up his head spins. “Sounds great.”

He hears some shuffling on the end of your line before you say, “Amazing. I’ll see you then. Sorry, gotta go. Bye Remus!”

“Bye, sweetheart.”

Remus has about thirty seconds of wallowing in self-pity before his phone is ringing again. He wants to shove it in between his sofa cushions and forget about everything. But he sees Sirius' name flash up on the screen so he answers.

“Moony!” Sirius’s voice pierces the phone line and Remus cringes. “Remus, my good friend.”

“Did you just get lucky or something?” Remus gruffs.

“Huh?”

“You’re too happy. Calm it down.”

Sirius groans, “You’re so content with being miserable, Remus. Just because you can’t get your dick wet.”

Remus wished his stupid friend could see the displeasure on his face, “What do you want?”

“You’re free this weekend, aren’t you?” He questions and Remus hums a yes, expecting to hear the exact same question you had just asked him only three minutes ago.

“Well, you, me, the gang, and a few pints at The Red Lion. Sounds like a plan?” Remus detests his friend's happiness. Or envies it. He feels miserable and doesn’t think Sirius is deserving of his lack of enthusiasm just because you didn’t ask him out.

“Yeah, Y/N already asked me,” he replies.

“Well, don’t get too excited.” Sirius huffs a laugh.

“No, sorry. It’s just I thought she- never mind. Sounds good.”

“Awesome. I’ll send you the deets.”

Remus almost laughs, “The deets? Wait until I tell Marls you talk like that.”

“Shut up.”

“Bye, Sirius.”

Sirius hangs up before he can.

Remus spots you before you do, again. Watches where you lean against the bar on your tip-toes, talking to the bartender about something. He’s making you laugh and he feels the stupid need that it should be him instead.

He does what he always does; walks up behind you and presses his shoulder into your back. You chirp and turn around. Then, your eyes do that thing that they always do that makes him bite the inside of his cheek. They squint, confused, and then light up when you realise who you’re looking at. Remus could swear that they sparkle, but that’s just something he imagines in his lovesick head.

“Remus!” You smile, mouth upturning until the apples of your cheeks swell. You wrap your fingers around his bicep and pull him into your side. He lets you, willingly.

“Y/N,” he says probably a little too quietly for the setting. The pub is starting to fill quickly while the band does sound check, the general hubbub of the patrons mixes in with the strumming of guitars and the feedback from the mics.

“You’re all wet,” you giggle, pressing your fingers into the underside of his arm.

“Yeah, it’s starting to rain out there,” he says.

“You walked?” You frown, pulling your hands from his arm. He can still feel where your fingers were wrapped. A burn against his wet skin.

“From the bus stop.”

“You know there’s this thing wizards can do, I’m not sure if you heard of it. It’s called disapparition,” you quirk, mouth upturning into a teasing smile.

Amused, Remus says, “I don’t usually like muggles to watch someone appear out of thin air.”

You reach forward to grab some napkins from the dispenser on the bar, probably too many. “I would’ve picked you up,” you say matter-of-factly.

He doesn’t reply, just stops still when you reach up to brush away the damp hair from his eyes. There’s water bunching in his hair and falling in tiny beads down his face, over his top lip. You laugh when he licks it away before you dab across his forehead and then his cheeks.

“I missed you,” you say, bunching the paper into a ball.

Remus smiles, too hard he thinks. “You saw me last weekend.”

You think he might be teasing you, though you’re not sure. You feel like you’ve overstepped. Demure, your eyes widen at your error. “Sorry,” you laugh, airy and quiet.

Remus pokes you in your side, “I missed you too,” he laughs.

You nod your head and bite your lip. You feel eased. But embarrassed in the first place. Scrunching the ball of damp napkins in your hands until it pinches. Still, you’re overjoyed.

“What are you drinking?” you ask, splaying your hands over the bar, leaning where it comes up to your chest. You try to ignore everything. The way Remus is making you feel, the busy pub that’s teeming with rowdy people.

“Not sure,” he quirks, eyeing the taps at the end of the bar. “What about you?”

“I think I might just stick to squash,” you laugh knowingly.

“You’re on it tonight,” Remus laughs, splaying his fingers around your shoulder.

“I’m not having any repeats of last week.”

“Damn,” he pouts, “Drunk Y/N is cute.”

You warm, “Drunk Y/N is messy.”

He squeezes you, a funny pinch. “I think you can be both.”

You lean into his side while he orders your drinks. His hand doesn’t move and you don’t want it to. It’s warm and grounding and feels too good to be true. How touchy he is and how you love it. You imagine a world where he doesn’t just touch your shoulder. Imagining what he’d do if you were together. How ruining he would be.

Distracted by his grip on your arm, before you can even reach into your purse to grab your money, he’s paid.

“Remus,” you scold, pushing yourself off the bar.

“Dove,” he smiles, placating. He grabs both of your drinks, in one hand, fingers twisting. The other snakes down to grab your hand to guide you through the crowd of people.

“Stop paying for my drinks.” Someone bumps into you and Remus digs his elbow into your side to stop you from tripping. You smile thankfully.

You let him weave you through patrons, your hand flexing around his until you get to your table. Once you've sat down, he says, “Sorry, didn’t think a fiver would cover it.”

Faux scolding, you shove his arm. “I have more money on me this time.”

“Good,” Sirius pipes up, “you can buy me that cocktail you owe me.”

“I’m sorry, Sirius.” You act like it genuinely does upset you. Though the thought of how you acted when you were drunk last week, is worse. “I’m a really annoying drunk.”

“Sirius is being dramatic,” Remus sighs, leaning back against the booth. He throws an arm behind you, pressing it up against the wall. You stay sitting forward, not sure if it’d be too much to lean into him. Despite him making the first move. “You got your cocktail.”

“Yeah, you bought it,” Sirius faux scoffs. It’s hard to believe that he actually cares about a stolen mojito, easier to believe he’s determined to tease you until you die. “Doesn’t count.”

“I’ll buy you a cocktail if you really want me to, Sirius,” you lilt, happy to get him to shut up. It works when Remus shoots him a look you don’t understand. Sirius bites his tongue and sits back in his seat.

By the time James and Lily get back from the bar, the band has started their set and you’ve had enough time to think too much on whether or not you should lean into Remus’s side. His weight behind you feels like a magnet. The more you want to pull away the stronger the urge is to just give up and fall against him.

Much like everything is with Remus. The more you allow yourself to think you really do like him, the harder it is to keep to your regular ways. You’ve never allowed yourself to be so openly affectionate and loving towards someone without second-guessing every single thing you do.

Not that you don’t. Every time you speak to him, touch his arm for too long or allow yourself to wrap your own arm around his back, there’s that voice in the back of your head that’s screaming at you. Telling you that you’ve let your guard down too much for a boy you’re not even sure likes you as much as you do him and you’ve embarrassed yourself.

It’s totally overwhelming and constantly feels like a back-and-forth battle. Because, sure, it's no secret anymore to anyone who isn't Remus, that you like him. You just wished it were easier.

As if he can hear your head reeling, or he’s just noticed how quiet you’ve suddenly become, he nudges your leg where it’s crossed with his own jean-clad one.

“You okay?” he asks. His face is soft. Too soft for your dismissive and relentless thoughts to ebb. It’s suddenly painful to even be looking at him and you’ve only been around him for no less than twenty minutes. He’s always had that ability.

The nod you give him is unconvincing and your smile is even worse. His eyes flicker and you open your mouth to speak before he can, “Yeah, jus’ thinking.”

“I can tell.”

“You can?”

You chance another look back at him and regret it instantly when he’s smiling like he knows something you don’t. “Yeah.” He nods, “You’re making that face you always do when something’s eating at you.”

Hating being read for filth, you turn to take a sip from your drink, filling your mouth with your straw lest you say something stupid. You drink it too quickly, and once it’s down to its last dregs, your head aches. Brain freeze. You squeeze your eyes shut and try to distract yourself when you say, “What face?”

“Your lips part and your eyebrows pinch. Sometimes I have to double-check you’re not crying.” Remus is a lovely, horribly attentive boy. And if he keeps saying things like that, things that let you know he does actually pay attention to you, you’re not going to last. When you said you wondered how ruining he would be, this isn’t what you had in mind.

Remus says something to you again, but you don’t catch it. The band transitions into a much louder song and his words fall on deaf ears. You do, however, catch the look he shares with Sirius again over your shoulder.

Confused, you suddenly think fresh air would be better than to pain yourself through whatever’s happening around you. “I’ll go get that mojito,” you mumble.

You weave yourself over Remus’s lap, careful where your shoes and hands land, careful to also ignore where he stables you with his own hand on the back of your knee. You try to make it discrete as you beeline for the bar, taking a small turn to head for the back doors.

The warm air cast from the setting sun slowly dwindles away and you cross your arms over your body, leaning against the railing to the left of the smoking area. When the door shuts behind you, the music from inside slowly dies down and you’re grateful to be the only one out here.

The fear you have been feeling throughout your entire friendship with Remus does its best to claw its way up your throat. Makes your breathing staggered and your palms itch. You suspect if you spent any more time with him inside you would’ve only embarrassed yourself more than you feel like you already have. Best you do it out here instead.

The muffled music slowly grows louder when you hear the door open and you pay it no mind. Not until there’s a hand on your shoulder. You flinch and turn around, pushing yourself against the railing.

“Shit, sorry. Just me,” Remus smiles, pulling his hand from your shoulder.

“Remus,” you breathe, hand to your chest, “You scared me.”

“Sorry,” he frowns.

You pause. Trust him to notice your departure. You hope he doesn’t ask you any questions, you don’t expect yourself to hold anything in anymore if he soothes you over.

“You okay?”

Fuck sakes.

“Um, yeah.” You nod. Remus moves to your side, arm pressed up against the railing and you follow him. Turning so you’re face to face.

“You sure? You just kind of up and left.” he laughs weakly, stopping when he notices you don’t join in.

“Sorry,” you apologise.

“What for?” he asks kindly. You once more detest his kindness and his ability to get you to open up.

“I don’t know,” you sigh, leaning further into the railing and it rattles, “I’m being weird.” You’re not opening up like you’d expected, though the words you want to say to him are at the back of your mind, where they were once pushed away, slowly crawling forward. If he keeps looking at you like that, they might spill.

“You’re not.”

“I am. I’m thinking too much and it,” you heave a calming breath. You want to tell him how you feel, not ramble, “it hurts.”

“Hey,” He traces a line over the hinge of your elbow, “what’s going on in that head of yours, hm? Care to let me in?”

You swallow, “That’s the problem. I can’t find the words.”

“That’s okay.” He squeezes your arm, “Take your time.”

His gaze is soft though it still burns where it’s settled over your face, his grip on your arm is worse. Still, it’s grounding. You blink and take a few calming breaths.

The door opens up again and the band’s music spews back outside. It’s the same song that was playing the night you sat on Sirius's couch and you’d freaked about how it was both your favourite. In some cheesy, cliche way, you take it as a sign.

“I’ve never been one for showing, let alone telling someone how I feel about them,” you begin, “I’m not sure if that’s the most obvious thing ever, or if I’ve gotten really good at hiding it but…”

Remus is smiling widely, more smug than anything. It makes you nervous and you advert your gaze to the ground. Over the ash-strained brick tile under your sneakers, “Stop looking at me like that or I won’t be able to finish what I’m trying to tell you,” you sigh.

“Like what?” he asks like he’s oblivious. Like his mouth isn’t now upturned into the slyest smile.

“That!’’ Your face grows warm and you have to press the backs of your hands into them. You can feel the thrumming of your heart in your fingertips.

“Sorry, you were saying,” he chuckles.

“God, where did you get all this confidence from, Remus?” you ask, a little dazed. Maybe it’s the setting or the fact you’re both finally sober together that brings out a different side of him, though you can’t be sure.

Remus shakes his head, “I’m sorry, you just look so cute when you get flustered.”

Your mouth parts, a shocked, demure gasp slips past them. Gawping, you say, “You’re not drunk, are you?” It’s not the first time he’s said it, but it's the first time it feels different.

“Not this time. For once,” he laughs knowingly.

“Right,” you pause. Taking in a shuddered breath. In what world you would ever expect this to be easy, you’re not sure. You’re also not sure that doing this with Remus makes it easier. Easier, because he makes you feel secure and appropriately worked down to tell him anything; harder because it’s him you have to let your emotions go with. It’s him you have to let know of your heartachingly, sore feelings you have. He can’t just be there on the sidelines guiding you through it.

Remus watches you slip away into your shy, quiet self again. He can almost hear your thoughts reeling, “God, you’re worse than me.”

You giggle nervously, all pitched up and light, “You make me nervous,”

He steps forward and if your eyes weren’t stuck on the ground, you wouldn’t have noticed it. He’s smooth. “Do I now?” He hooks a knuckle under your downwardly pointed chin and gives it a tap.

You look back up, catching his gaze, “I hate you,”

“No you don’t,” he says matter of factly. Like its the most obvious thing ever. You’re sure it is.

“I don’t?” You blink slowly.

He closes the gap between you some more and suddenly you’re overwhelmed by him. The smell of his laundry detergent, something familiar and heady, mixed in with the cologne that you swear follows you home. Where the toe of his boot almost touches your sneaker and where the sleeve of his sweater catches on your bracelet because he’s as close as possible. Though you still think he’s not close enough.

His voice mixes in with the same song that’s playing inside and you can barely hear him when it builds to a crescendo and he says, “You weren’t about to go on some rant about how you love me?”

“Remus…” you murmur, quieter than the thumping of your heart in your chest,

“No?”

You bite your tongue, but it does nothing to stop you from saying, “God, yes. Just- kiss me, please.”

“What?” he asks, more shocked than you’ve been this entire interaction.

“Kiss me, Remus. Before the song ends.” You lean into him, up on the balls of your feet and pull your hands between your bodies.

Face to face, lips hovering over yours, he murmurs, “You sure?”

“Completely,”

It’s the last thing you say before Remus kisses you so hard, so deep, that you forget how it was even possible to form words in his presence before now. Snakes his arms around your back and holds you so close your shirt rides up until your skin presses into the soft material of his sweater.

He tastes of stout, a weird mixture against the lemon on your tongue. You can’t find it in you to mind when he hums into your mouth. A desperate, pleading sound that has you squeezing the flesh of his hips. Compared to the reserved and diffident relationship you’ve held with Remus up until now, the kiss you share is nothing alike. It’s passionate and heated. Longing.

The song ends and with a final tug of your bottom lip, he pulls away panting. Eyes skipping over your face, a little glassy and bouncy. “Fuck,” he murmurs.

Tugging on the hem of his sweater, you say, “What?’' with a light chuckle.

“If I…” Remus has to compose himself lest he says something embarrassing. Completely forward. “If I knew kissing you would’ve been like that…I would’ve done it ages ago.”

“I think I’ve wanted you to kiss me for a really long time,” you confess, giddily rocking back and forth on your feet. Canvas sneakers crushing into the ground.

“Yeah?” he hums. Smugness still ever present.

“Yeah.”

“Thoughts on me kissing you again?” he asks, still not letting you go where you’re held against his torso.

You look over his shoulder, “I think if you kiss me again, Sirius’s jaw might fall to the floor.”

Remus turns and spots Sirius and James almost pressed to the glass window. James doesn’t look as pleased, shoving a crumpled note into Sirius's palm. Turning back to face you, he rolls his eyes, “I think they had a bet going.”

“Should we give Sirius his money’s worth?” you giggle.

“I’m going to kiss you. But, not for Sirius.” Remus says, “Only because you look insanely beautiful right now and if I don’t do it again, my brain might go numb.”

“What are you waiting for then?”

“Nothing.”

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loving-and-dreaming · 1 year

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4 times remus calmed you down and 1 time you calmed him down

Remus lupin x reader

You’re a hothead, Remus is your calming boyfriend. Take a look at four times he calms you down and the one time you had to calm him down.

Word Count: 6.6k

Being a part of the marauders you would have thought Remus was as crazy as them. However you would be very wrong. He is the calming force within their group. He is the reason they do not get in trouble, great at sweet talking whoever he needs to whether it be the person they pranked, or Professor Mcgonagall to not suspend them. Whatever it is about him he is just great at claming hotheads down. SO it surprised no one when he himself found a girlfriend who fits right in with his group of hothead friends.

The first time

Maddie comes bursting into y’alls room with tears in her eyes. She trips over her shoes and falls on the floor. The floor is not super messy, but it was the weekend and you were relaxing while she was at a party held by some random Gryffindor. So cleaning was not today's priority, that will be tomorrow's problem. Maddie is sitting on the floor, her back against her bed, knees pulled up to her chest just crying. You get down from your bed and join her on the floor, sitting criss-crossed in front of her. Opening your arms, in case she wanted a hug or space. Clearly she wanted a hug, because as soon as your arms opened up she threw herself at you. She just sat there in your arms crying it could have been minutes or hours, but it didn't matter she needed you. Eventually when she could not cry anymore you attempted to wade through and figure out what had happened.

“What happened? I thought you were going to the party. Did something happen at the party? Do I need to get a professor? What about going to the infirmary?” rattling off the questions, you can't help it. When your best friend comes home from a party crying your mind has jumped to the worst possible case.

“I just thought maybe it was going somewhere. We talked all night, the entire party! He got me drinks, he asked me questions, we even made out, y/n!” Maddie starts to tear up again, but you grab her face and stop her.

“No. Absolutely not. Whoever it is, he is not worth your tears. I am so sorry that it happened, do you think he led you on? Or do you think you might have read too much into it? Either answer is okay, I’m just curious.”

“I am not sure, maybe I read too much into it? But still I also felt really led on. Because that's not where it ends. I went to the bathroom, and when I came back-”

“No. Nope. Please tell me this is not going where I think it is going…” She needs you to be calm and kind, but damn is it a struggle to not let your anger get the best of you.

“Yes! Sirius was not only with another girl, but making out with her. So I left… I came straight here. I didn't mean to interrupt your time alone, I just needed to get out of there.”

“Sirius? You mean Sirius Black? Maddie. You know better. YOu know his reputation. Honey. I love you, and it is no excuse for him being a dick and only thinking with his little head. I am so sorry. What do you need from me? I can get you some chocolate and we can listen to some muggle heartbreak songs and cry our eyes out? Or do we need to go find another hot guy to make out with? Or my personal favorite one, go give him a piece of our minds?”

“No. none of those please. I think I just want to sleep it off. I know it was blown out of proportion, the drinks absolutely did not help. Thank you y/n, I love you and I really needed this talk. Just talking it out really helped. But I think between this and the alcohol I'm ready for bed.” Maddie gets up and makes her way to the bathroom, you can faintly hear her starting her nightly routine.

“Hey Mads! I am going to go for a short walk! I'll be back soon. I might sneak into the kitchen to get us some chocolate cake from dinner!” There is a mumbled response, but you put your shoes on and walk out anyway. Closing the door softly, you make your way to Gryffindor common room. The way you are walking, it is clear there is a purpose and to not mess with you. While in Maddies presence you were calm and cool and collected, now you are a girl on a mission. When walking through the halls you hardly notice the other people scurrying to get back to their rooms without getting caught out past curfew, or the pictures hanging on the wall looking at you like you are crazy. Now you are not a violent person by nature, you talk a big game about beating people, but really the only people you hit or slap are your friends(in joking manners). But you are fuming and have no idea what will happen to the infamous Sirius Black.

Arriving at the Gryffindor common room, you find the door propped open. Not being well known had its perks, you were able to slip in the chaos without being noticed. It looked to be in the middle of the party so you grabbed a drink and looked like you fit right in. Really your purpose for being there was completely different than everyone else. Slowly making your way around the party you spot James. One thing to know about the marauders, is if you see one, the others are not far behind. That proves to be true, when you look around and spot Sirius in a conversation with Peter. Just seeing his face makes your blood boil again, so you make your way over. You stop in front of them and before anyone can ask what is going on you throw your drink in Sirius’ face. Everyone around is too shocked to even react, it is not till you throw the crumbled up cup at his head that he shakes his head. “What the fuck was that for? Who even are you?” he's yelling at you, by now most of the party has looked to see what is going on.

“I really don't care for you to know who I am! However when you piss off the wrong girl and can't keep your tiny dick in your pants this is what happens.” You are getting closer and closer to him, but he is as much of a hothead as you are so he is not going to back down. The problem is neither are you. “I don't know who taught you to think with your tiny, and I mean tiny, head rather than the one we all use. But clearly something is wrong with you. Maybe it is all the STDs you probably have-”

A calming voice stops you in the middle of you berating Sirius, “Whoa love, how about we calm down some and talk about it.” He slowly puts his hands on your shoulders and when he sees you are not going to respond to his touch with violence, he grabs your chin gently and moves your head so you are looking at him and not at Sirius.

“Moony seriously, do not waste your time on this bitch-”

“Can it Sirius, clearly something happened,”

He moves back to looking at you, you might be pissed but you are not blind, this man is beautiful. He reminds you of a dream the way he was able to calm you down. Once he sees that your breathing is not as labored as it was he cups your cheeks with both of his hands, “good job on calming down. Would you like to tell me what happened from the start?” You go to move your head to glare at Sirius again, but his hands keep you in place, “No darling, don't look at that fool, look at me. Tell me what happened.” in the middle of your explanation you somehow ended up in a room with just this random stranger. You later learn his name to be Remus and that he is friends with Sirius, but is nothing like him. Something about his eyes and the feeling of his hands on your face is what was able to reel you back in from being so angry.

The second time

Being embarrassed like that did not sit well with Sirius. So he and James do what they do best. Plan to prank someone and embarrass you just as bad and you embarrassed him. It was simple really. You were to come out of (your common room) and there was a bucket of tar and another bucket of feathers waiting to cover you from head to toe. What Sirius and James didn’t expect was Remus to come and find them.

Remus walks up behind them and starts to question what they are doing “What are y’all doing in front of (your common room) door? Don’t tell me this is another prank. I told y’all you cannot plan those without me. The last time you two did you got a month of detention!”

Without taking his eyes off the buckets that were only being held up by the magic in their wands he responds, “you remember that random girl who threw the drink in my face? The one you stopped from slapping me. Yeah we found out she is in (your house) so we are going to embarrass her like she embarrassed me.”

“Sirius, no.” At this Sirius gives him a look, but still his focus is on the buckets. “She was just looking out for her friend. James does the same for you, heck I do the same for you. This is too far and not okay.” At this Sirius and James both turn around and start to say something until they hear a shriek. It turns out when they turned around to talk, they put their wands down. When the wands go down so do the buckets. Remus has a horrified look on his face, which makes Sirius and James smirk and turn around. However, what they see is not what they were expecting. It is a little boy, a first or second year crying. They do have the decency to look and feel bad, they start to walk up but then they see something that scares even them and freezes them in their spot. It was not a professor, no it was you.

You rushed out when you heard all the commotion. Looking up to find out what happened and who did it. What you see makes your blood boil again. They see you whisper something to the little boy, and then see you stomp your way over. Turning to leave, they are blocked by Remus, “absolutely not. You dug your grave, now lay in it. You need to help that little boy get cleaned up.”

“You have got to be kidding me. Do you get off on pranking and making little kids cry? What is wrong with you two?” You look at Remus and can just tell by the look of disappointment and sympathy he had nothing to do with this prank(which makes sense because when he is involved the pranks are perfect and no one ever gets caught). You grab both Sirius and James by their ears and pull them over to the young boy. Maddie is attempting to calm him down but he is still incredibly upset and covered in tar and feathers. “You apologize now. And then we will go to my bathroom and help him get cleaned up!”

Sirius and James do apologize, and are incredibly sorry. They didn’t mean for it to go this far. It was just meant to be payback on you. But it is clear they are now so high on your shit list it’s not even funny. Maddie brings the boy to y’all’s bathroom while you drag both boys by their ears to follow. Remus is silently following behind. He knows he should interfere, but they kind of deserve what is happening. Once in the bathroom those two are helping the boy get cleaned up, but you? Oh you are fuming and pissed. And what do you do when you are this pissed? You can’t sit still. So you are pacing and lecturing them. “Who in their right mind pranks little kids. Granted I think you pranking anyone is stupid. But our first years? Seriously! We are supposed to protect them. And this is how you treat them. What is wrong with you? You two are deranged. Absolutely mad. -“

James rolls his eyes and whispers under his breath “Oh my gosh you sound like my mom.”

“I’m going to choose to ignore that.” You are interrupted by Remus grabbing your hand. The boys have heard enough, and he can see the you getting more and more agitated.

“Maddie, would you mind staying with the boys and making sure everyone gets cleaned up? I want to talk to y/n” Remus asks in a quiet voice.

“Of course, use our room. I’ll make sure everyone gets cleaned up and taken care of.” Once he gets the okay he softly pulls you out of the bathroom.

“Love. Can you look at me?” He has both of your hands in his hands, rubbing them with his thumbs.

Still frustrated, “I just don’t understand how you can be friends with them. They are awful and are worse than cavemen!”

“Y/N I promise that’s what you see but they are so much better than that. I promise you Sirius is beating himself up because he does take care of the first years. He knows what it’s like to be alone so he makes sure they never feel alone. I can’t defend what they were planning to do to you because it was an asshole move. But they are hotheads and do things without thinking. I understand you are frustrated and probably annoyed, but why don't we take your mind off it? Maddie has got it taken care of.” He looks as sees the book you are currently reading on your nightstand, “how about I read to you? Do you think that will help us relax?”

You look at him sheepishly. Of course you want this handsome boy to read to you in his soothing voice. I mean you are already in your pjs and are already ready for bed, so why not. Looking at him unsure, he gets up, grabs the book and sits at the head of your bed. He pats the spot next to him, it takes you a moment before you move. The next thing he does shocks you to your core, he grabs your shoulders and maneuvers you to where your back is against his chest at an angle so you can see the book too. It takes you a moment to melt into his embrace but eventually you and him are so close, you can't tell where your body ends and his begins. When he is reading to you you can't help but think, ‘is it weird im basically cuddling a dude I don't even know? Is it bad that I'm enjoying it? How does he calm me down like nothing? This is insane, but I'm just going to go with the flow for right now.’ between the beat of his heart, his soothing voice, and the feeling of his arms you pass out.

He can see your chest begin to rise and fall steadily and assumes you are asleep. Sirius, James and Maddie are still working, so he takes this time to relax with the beautiful hothead cuddling up against him. Eventually he falls asleep to the sound of your breathing and the feeling of your body against his.

James, Sirius, Maddie, and the boy they learned his name to be Luke come out and all stop suddenly. They look at the two people fast asleep cuddled on y/n’s bed. Sirius sighs and says, “well looks like she is going to be in our life more often Prongs…” He turns to Maddie, “I am sorry for what happened last weekend. I truly apologize. I hope we can work past it and be great friends, because it looks like we will be hanging out more often.``

The Third Time

Sirius was in fact right. You and Maddie have infiltrated the marauders. Maddie goes where you go, because you refuse to leave her behind, you two are attached at the hip. Remus and you grew closer. The six of you are always together, funnily enough Maddie is now closest to Sirius. How the tables have turned. The reason you even met the marauders is because Siri made her cry and now they are inseparable. But you and Remus, man you and Remus are so close. Most of the time he is sleeping in your room, or y'all are eating off each other's plates (and he doesn’t share his food with anyone). In this process you couldn't help but fall for him. His soft eyes, the why he takes care of you, his calming voice, it was impossible not to. However this is a secret you will take to your grave. Not only have you made four great friends, you can see Maddie fitting in perfectly, you are not going to ruin that because stupid feelings.

Not only are you and Remus attached at the hip outside of class, the one class you share you now sit basically on top of each other. When it came time for the mid year project you were ecstatic that you had Remus, because like you he cares about his school work. It turned out it was a group project however, and you two just partnered up with two other random people, Jesse and Krsitina, in your class. In hindsight, there is not much you can do when your professor demands it be a group project and yall know no one else in that class. But at this moment you can only think of pushing your other partners into the black lake.

It was your idea. It was a fresh day, nice and spring. The flowers are blooming, the lake looks beautiful, and the butterflies are out in full force. You all decided to meet at the library today after lunch, and then would move outside by the lake. Only problem is one of your partners is a no show. Jesse offers to go and look for Kristina. So you and Remus tell him where you will be while he goes and looks for Kristina. Arriving at the perfect spot you set down the blanket and lay out all your books and the plant you will be studying. Waiting for a little bit was okay, but once it is 20 minutes with no sign of Jesse or Kristina you give up.

You stand up, because everyone knows when you are frustrated you can't stay still. Starting to pace, the more you think of it the more agitated you get. You are too busy in your head to see Remus and how worried he is for you. All you can think about while pacing is how this entire project has been just you, Remus, and Jesse. The entire time Kristina has literally done nothing and boy were you frustrated.

“I don't understand. It is insane. It is her project too. But between me, you, and Jesse we have done everything. It is ridiculous. I am done. I don't even want to put her name on the project. What if we just don't? Is that too rude? I mean she hasn't helped with anything. It is such bullshit. I don't want to put her name on it! Maybe that will teach her.”

“Whoa y/n, love. Is that really what you want to do? You know I will support you in anything, and back you up. But once you do that you have completely burned that bridge. Maybe we should just talk with the professor first? See if she has any suggestions?.” He takes your hand and leads you back to the blanket. By now he knows that if you are already pacing you just need to talk outloud to process your feelings. But since you have not started ranting after he spoke he takes it as a sign you are ready to calm down. What you don't know is he has been doing some reading on different ways to calm people down, that is why he does what he does next. “We have been talking, but we haven't taken a moment to just be and listen. Wanna try?”

Okay let's be honest, it sounds cheesy, but for him you would do anything. So with a look on your face you nod and say “I guess.” he sits yall down on the blanket and moves everything. He moves to sit criss crossed on the blanket and pulls you to rest your head in his lap. Between his natural comforting self and the soft grass underneath the blanket, you automatically feel the tension slowly melting away. The next thing he does has you scrunching up your nose, but like we said for him you would do anything at this point. He takes off his tie and ties it around your eyes, he knows if he just told you to close them you would get bored and open them before he was ready for you to.

“Okay y/n bear with me. Your eyes are covered because we take in so much with our eyes and right now we are wanting to focus on what we can hear. Did you know that when you take away one sense, the rest intensify? Well we are gonna test that. Just listen.” He takes the clip out of your hair and you feel him slowly detangling it and running his hands through it. You're listening to all the sounds and at first it is overwhelming. But slowly you focus on one at a time.

The first thing you focus on is the soft lapping of the water. With Remus’ hands in your hair and your eyes covered it feels as if you are floating over the water. You can hear it that clearly.

The next sound you can hear is buzzing. There are lots of bugs and you wish you could say you know the exact type of bug… but alas when bugs are near you are nowhere to be seen. So your knowledge on them is limited. But not seeing them and again with his hands in your hair you envision the bees(yes you envisioned them to be bees because bumblebees are cute) dancing with each other in the wind.

The last notable sound is the humming coming from above you. Not only do you hear it but you can feel it from where your head is resting on his legs and slightly on his tummy. You don't know what he is humming. All you know is your heart beat is slowing down and your face is no longer heated(when you get made you feel like your face is on fire from how mad you get). But no. All of that is gone. When you have remus around what normally takes you hours or even days to calm down, takes less than an hour.

Jesse ended up showing up saying Kristina is nowhere to be found. So the three of you worked on the project. Lets just say you were in a dream-like state the rest of the day, and Jesse was surprised you were not fuming at the fact Kristina was a no show again.

The Fourth Time

To say the entire school was shocked at the lack of label on you and Remus is an understatement. There are bets going on, Sirius and James trying to work in the background to make one of you confess something. The loving gazes are too much, the ditchING everyone else just because the other one mentioned something is ridiculous, the love that could be shared if someone just grew a pair and said something is about to make everyone scream. But here we are, you two hanging out in his room. He was reading on his bed while you were finishing up some class work on his desk.

This is not uncommon for the two of you. Being in each other's presence doing separate things, yet this doesn't mean yall do not do things together. Most nights you two are reading in his bed or yours and pass out there. Or in the great hall eating together, you two have gotten in the habit of both getting different things but then eating off each other's plates. You think it's a great use of time, you get one thing you both want to try and he gets something you both want to try and then you just share. You do this when you go out to hogsmeade as well.

You need to make a quick note to write back to your parents, if you don't write it down you will forget. Well you sure aren't writing it in your notes or textbook, so you do the logical thing. Try to find a piece of scrap paper on Remus’ desk. Finding what you thought was blank paper and write yourself the note. You flip it over in case you need to write something else, that's when you notice the writing. Not trying to be nosey, but you read it because you need to know if you say sorry to Remus for ruining an important paper or just take it. However when skimming it you have to reread it to make sure you were not going crazy… ‘Remus I know you are at Hogwarts on scholarship, why are you wasting your time? We both know that with your furry monstrous condition you have no real future. Why not come home. Your mom misses you anyways. Maybe you can get a job as a local gardener or something. One of those jobs that no one pays attention to? Because son I am telling you now no one is going to want to deal with the monster you are. So it might be best if you stop wasting time with learning and this dream of being a healer and come home. Your mom has not touched your room.’ With each word you take in you get angrier and angrier. Clearly you were showing it on your body because the next thing you know Remus is grabbing it out of your hands.

He sighs because he knows what is coming but tries to avert it anyways, “It’s nothing y/n. Please let's just leave it alone.” you take a moment, still internalizing everything you just read. You cannot believe that his own father is the one he listens to. It all makes sense now, how when you first found out about him being a werewolf he gave you an out. Told you he doesn't blame you if you want to leave. Of course you got upset with that and called him ridiculous. But it all makes sense now. He is hearing those awful words from his family, even when he is away at school. You can only imagine how bad it was before he came to school and how bad it is during the breaks. No wonder he stays here as often as he can or goes home with one of his friends.

Still frozen out of anger you finally reboot and turn to look at him. He has gone back to reading like nothing happened. Like your heart did not just get ripped out of your chest and set on fire. Standing up so fast the chair gets knocked back, you stomp over to him and grab his book out of his hands. Yes you are rougher than you meant but you are livid, if this was a cartoon steam would be coming from your ears. He doesn't even flinch. He does however sit up straighter and give you all of his attention. By now he knows the stages of your anger, at first you are quiet and processing it, next you pace to get the ideas forming more, then you rant or yell, then you come down and typically get sleepy. He gives you time to get your thoughts in order, because he found out very quickly he can only calm you down if he knows what is going on in your head. “Pretty girl, take your time but as soon as you are ready to talk your feelings out I’m here. Take your time.”

Starting to pace your thoughts are slowly becoming coherent and not a jumbled mess. “Please for the love of god do not tell me you believe that bullshit. That is the dumbest shit I have ever read. You’re a monster? The man that gets my favorite food so I can eat double of it, or gets something else I want to try so I can try both things. The man that ditches his friends for me when I want to have a quiet night in reading? Oh yeah, such a monster. Oh wait, let's not forget how you help everyone before you even think of helping yourself. OH yeah let's talk about the fact that you always walk on my left side because you know I hate holding hands with my right hand. Or the fact that you let me sleep with it freezing because I like to get all bundled up. Such a monster. That lying piece of shit. You know that right? Absolutely in no way are you a monster. Is that why you gave me an out? I cannot believe this. You! A monster! That is almost comical. What is that dicks address? I need to give him a piece of my mind. And how you won’t to be a good healer? Such bullshit! Remember that time James broke his arm and you fixed it! We didn’t even have to go to the infirmary! You are such an amazing human being and I am glad I get to be your friend. I would love to get to show you how much I love you, but I don't want to ruin our friendship. But gosh if I could just tell you how much I love you. I love you remus so much it hurts-”

All of a sudden you are quiet. It takes you a moment to understand why. Remus has his lips on yours. Like the naturally dominating person he is, he controls the kiss but that is fine by you. Your mind is shut off, which rarely happens. All you can focus on is the way he tastes like hot chocolate and mint. And oh how soft his lips are. And how well they fit with yours. It is like he is your missing puzzle piece. All of a sudden everything is gone but you, him, and y’all’s lips. Eventually he pulls away because air is a must to survive, but after that kiss he feels alive for the first time.

With his hands on your face, “You really love me?”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“In the middle of you talking you said you love me and how much you want to tell me but not ruin the friendship… If you didn't mean it we can totally pretend the kiss didn't happen, but I’m not sure about you but that felt like home for me and I'm not going to pretend it didn't.”

“Wait no please, of course I meant what I said, I've been in love with you for as long as I can remember. You are my home so of course that felt like homie for me too. I just didn't even realize I said it out loud. That is not how I imagined this happening, and trust me I have imagined it many different ways.”

“Well I am glad we got that out of the way, I love you too. Can we please just go lay down? Maybe take a nap before dinner?”

“Of course Remus.” You take his hand and lead him to the bed. Both of you get under the covers and snuggle really close together. “I am so sorry about everything I said but I hope you know you are not a monster and if I have to prove to you everyday that you are not I will spend the rest of my life doing-” he kisses you again this time softly and slowly. “What was that for, not that I'm complaining?”

“You were getting upset again and I don't want you to be upset . I like you just like this pretty girl, in my arms, kiss drunk, and calm. I love you y/n.”

The one time you calm remus down

Spending your seventh year Christmas break with Remus is a dream come true. All except where you were. You will never forget that letter, those words imprinted on your brian. You almost said no, but his mom is the sweetest and wants to meet you. ANd who are you to turn down his sweet mother. So after spending a week with your family, you must travel to his family. You both decide to take a muggle train, something you two are comfortable doing.

With his hand in yours, you find your seats and get comfortable. He is reading a book while you look at the world flying past you. Yet your mind is running faster than the train. You need to give yourself a pep talk on how to approach his father. You already told Remus you will be civil, but that is it. That man deserves nothing from Remus or you. His mom is the only reason you agreed, well and the loving brown haired boy next to you lost in his book. You squeeze his hand and he squeezes it back, this is y’all’s silent way to say I love you.

The ride to his hometown gave you time to nap and read with Remus. Your two favorite things to do with him. Within this time two things are going through your mind on repeat: 1. You love Remus and will give him the world, 2. You are doing this for his mom, not his piece of shit dad.

Arriving at his parents' place has you jittery with nerves, but again you just repeat those two things and are hoping for the best. He walks in and you follow. The first thing you notice is the house doesn't feel like a home, no pictures of him as a kid, no family pictures. The house reminds you of a model home. Walking Up the stairs you get to his room to find it the same as the rest of the house. It breaks your heart, but again you tell yourself you are doing this for him and no one else(well his mom too). Yall do not unpack, just set the things down on the bed and go to make some tea. His parents must still be out, because they have not come to see yall.

Making the tea and sitting on the couch you two just spend some time in each other's company. Sometimes you exchange small words and soft conversations, but really between the car ride and muggle train ride you both are sleepy and just wanting to be in each other's presence. The door opens and both of you pick up your heads and go to stand up. His parents notice yall in the living room and immediately come over.

“Oh hi dear! You must be y/n, I've heard so much about you! I am so glad you were able to make it for a little bit. We are so happy to have Remus home and even more happy he has brought you!”

“Hi Mrs. Lupin, it is so nice to meet you as well! You have a beautiful house, thank you for inviting us to stay here.” During this conversation, his dad doesn't mention anything. But from the look on his face he is clearly not happy about something. His mom drags you to the kitchen to show you some of the Christmas decorations they bought for the holiday since all the family will be coming to their house this holiday. There were so many decorations, and seeing as you love this holiday you are more than excited to help her!

But all of that is halted when you hear shouting. Automatically thinking the worst about you and mrs. Lupin goes back into the living room doorway where the boys still are. Both of you missed what must have set him off, but for the first time in your relationship you see Remus shouting. Embarrassingly so it is normally you that is shouting… But you do catch what he says and your heart stops.

“I love her dad. I am so tired of you putting me down. But whatever, I'm used to it. But her? Absolutely not. I draw the line there. She is the best thing to happen to me. She believes in me, she loves me and most importantly she accepts me for who I am. ALL of who I am. So don't come in here and judge us when you don't know her or us as a couple. That is the woman I am going to marry someday and I will not stand by and let you talk about her like that! If that is all you can say or do then I think we will be staying somewhere else until the holiday dinner.” He turns to come and get you but stops when he sees you. You can see it in his face that he is ready to leave.

But you know he would regret it and miss his mom. So you do something you never thought you would have to do. You grab his face with both of your hands and make him look at you, much like he did the very first time he calms you down. Before saying anything you bring his head down to yours and lay your foreheads together. In a hushed voice you say “Yes remus. I will marry you. Obviously when we are older, but when you find the right moment to propose, I will say yes. I love you with my entire being and I would love nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you. I know you are the one normally calming me down so I have no idea if I'm doing this right, but my love, I am here for you. I am right here by your side. Whatever you want to do I will do.”

If you ask him, he still does not know exactly what calmed him down, was it your hands on his face? Was it you saying yes to being his wife someday? Was it your foreheads touching? Was it the soft kiss you gave him? He doesn't know all he knows if he loves you with his entire being plus the moon, and even though you might be a hothead and more times than not he is pulling your away ro calming you down he wants you to be his wife and the mother of his children.

#remus lupin x yn #remus lupin #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x fem!reader #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin blurb #remus lupin x you #sirius black #James potter #marauders #marauders fluff #marauders fanfiction #marauders era x reader #marauders x reader #marauders era #marauders imagine

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velvetcloxds · 11 months

Note

dilf!remus lupin reaction to chubby!reader getting a wrist tattoo which is kinda related to him?

TO THE MOON AND TO SATURN | R.L.

word count: 0.8k

warnings: age gap, chubby reader not specified, cheeseee

Remus had a hard day, those weren’t as rare as they used to be, exam season coming into full swing leaving the poor professor drained, in desperate need of sleep as he sat back on his sofa sipping at the last sip of his red wine staring tiredly at the tests scattered over the coffee table. You, however, were in a much different mood, excitedly pulling your sleeve over your wrist. You’d never been one to do something spontaneous, happy with following a set plan for every aspect of your life until you’d met Remus, the most unexpected thing you’d ever allowed yourself to indulge in was losing him. You’d heard the stories of him, the rumours of a wild teen taking Hogwarts by storm and managing to surprise everyone with his genius in the process, and though you’d never known that version of him, happily loving the more mature and wise version you’d gotten the honour of falling in love despite your best intentions not to, you’d have a soft spot for your Moony and you always wanted to show him that.

You weren’t surprised to hear the soft jazz that filled the little muggle apartment the two of you shared, the music had quickly become your own reminder of home when he had to stay at Hogwarts during the full terms. You were even less surprised to find him in the living room, barely made it out of his suit, tie hanging undone around his neck as he offered you the purest smile despite sleep tugging it down.

“Darling,” Remus breathed with the gentlest tone, enough to pull you right to him and you gave in quickly, kicking off your shoes in the process of walking to him, sighing in pure delight as you fell into his lap. Your hand moved to their own accord as you began brushing his hair out of his face, smiling fondly at the sight of him, so perfect despite the state of him and somehow all yours.

“You should be in bed,” you reprimanded, and he hummed, half in agreement, half in regret that he couldn’t go to bed yet even if he wanted to. It was silly, really, the way you’d dance this little dance every night, yet every time you looked at him and held him like this it felt new, a little blessing you received anew each day. “But I’m glad you aren’t,” you didn’t think he’d perk up so quickly at that, daring hands moving lower down your back as you shifted. “I did something.”

“I’m going to need more than that, trouble,” you smiled, biting back a giggle at his curious gaze trying desperately to see if he missed a new haircut or new clothes, you were always very excited to show him either of those, but you seemed too familiar by the looks of it. You allowed the giggle to escape, excitedly presenting him your wrist, the tattoo was fresh, painful still and you were sure in an hour you’d absolutely hate yourself for the spontaneity, but Remus was smiling through furrowed brows, he was excited because you were excited but the more that he looked at it the less he knew what to do with his face.

“It’s Saturn,” you explained, not explaining much in the process but still it was a start, his fingers were gentle as they took hold of you, thumb hovering over the design tracing it in the air and even though he didn’t touch you it still earned a shiver through your body. “I love you to the moon and to Saturn,” seemed simple enough but his thumb paused over the little paw prints that spread through the fine linework, he knew it was for him, he didn’t have to think too hard to note that, but he couldn’t believe it. “My moony,” you whispered, and he couldn’t kiss you fast enough, smiling against your lips when you whispered your little question, asking him if he liked it, the silliest question in the world.

“My star,” he teased, and his grip was strong as it cupped your warm cheeks, your smile was poisonous, killing him slowly as he tried to capture it into his memory. “It’s beautiful, you’re beautiful,” he was careless in stealing another kiss, not surprised when you leaned into it, into him, gentle hands traveling up his crinkled button-down shirt.

“I got it for you,” you mumbled and looked down to the little gesture, happy now with the looks of it, happy that he likes it.

“Yeah?” his tone was low, playful really despite how much he appreciated every bit of your sweet honour to him, you were shy, the biggest thing someone has ever done for him and you’re shy and he wanted to see how far he could push it. “Now why would you do that?”

“So that I can always have you with me.”

“Always, huh,” he flipped you over, smiling as your eyes daringly took in every bit of him. “I love you,” and he did, more than simple words could tell you but you knew, you felt it. “To Saturn,” he added and gently brought your hand up to look at the declaration of love painted into your skin for all eternity.

“To Saturn,” you breathed and he placed a featherlike kiss on the transparent band-aid covering the art of your love.

#discovered this in my drafts today and was so surprised because I can't even remember writing it let alone finishing and drafting it #remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x yn #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin one shot #remus lupin blurb #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin fanfic #remus lupin fic #monique's writing events #monique's event days #right where queue left me

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shadowbriar · 1 year

Text

Remus Lupin - Kiss it off Me

Pairing : (F/M) || Remus Lupin x Reader Word Count : 3.3k Warning : Injuries. Angst. Synopsis : Moving on from Remus seem to be impossible now that she knows the true reason behind his ever so egoistical refusal. Notes : No closure. Don’t come at me. Strikethrough on taglist means I couldn’t tag you. If you like this story and would like to support me, please visit my kofi page and perhaps get me a coffee?☕ Taglist : @mastermindmiko @420mitskilover @maylaysia109 @vi0letblu3s @imasimp48 @helloitsmeeeeeee @literallyforsmut0nly @judespoision

↞ Off My Limit

Perhaps it was never love. The feeling she's harboured inside her heart all these years, perhaps it wasn't love. Perhaps it was something else that wasn't in her dictionary. A devotion so deep, desire so heavy, and admiration so big she would jump in front of a train had he asked her to, but still it wasn't love.

Because if she loved him, it would've been easy for her to accept his truth.

She wanted to hurt him, the same way he's hurt her. She wanted him to feel the pain and agony of waking up each morning, having to know that she'll see his face in the Great Hall, laughing and talking to his friends like nothing happened during the break. She wanted him to drown in the torment of pretending that everything was fine and that she wasn't walking on the shattered pieces of her heart. She wanted him to cry himself to sleep the way she has been doing these late nights. But in order to do that, he would have to love her like she loves him and she knew that he doesn't.

Yet as funny as it goes, no matter how hurt she is right now from his nonchalant gesture, she couldn't hate him still. She would still find her eyes glancing at him, unabashedly hoping that he would look in her direction like he always would. She would find herself looking for him in the library, though she knew he wouldn't be there anymore. She would slow her pace in the corridor as she walked to her next class, trying to savour every second passed where she could watch him from afar.

Now she’s staring into the back of his head, an unconscious smile tugged on her face as he watches him throw banters to Sirius, trying to suppress his laughter. He looks beautiful. The light of the sun makes his dirty blond hair shine lighter, strands falling on his face.

“Mr. Lupin, would you like to share with the class what is so funny?” Professor Slughorn asked, his brows knitted but no trace of anger was evident on his face. Only pure confusion.

“Nothing, Professor.” Remus answers, clearing his throat as his cheeks turn red in embarrassment “My apologies.”

“Oh, nothing to apologise for, my boy. Come! Help me identify these potions.”

And so the boy walks to the middle of the classroom, standing by the table where cauldrons of potions were placed in front of him. Eyes were trained on him now, making him feel the slightest pressure possible but she knows that it would be an easy task for him to identify these potions. Remus has always excelled in Potions, afterall.

“This one is Dawdle Draught, Professor.” Remus begins, pointing at the first cauldron “It helps wizards and witches trace the Calamity.”

Professor Slughorn nods, satisfied with his answer and urges him to continue.

“This is Manegro Potion, which gives the drinker a rapid hair growth.”

“Indeed, it does.” The Professor said “And what would the last potion be, Mr. Lupin?”

“Amortentia, Sir. The strongest love potion in the world.” Remus answers, gulping as he comes closer to it “It’s supposed to smell differently to each according to what attracts us.”

His eyes move to her direction, locking their gazes.

“For instance,” He continues, not breaking their eye contact “I can smell chocolate, dusty leaves of books, and.. The sweet perfume of a close friend of mine.”

The classroom started to talk, whispering to each other what scent they smell and who the close friend Remus was talking about. A hint of crimson colour starts to taint his cheeks as he realised the not so subtle confession he made to the classroom. Perhaps not many of them understood who he was referencing but his friends knew, along with the girl he’s staring right back at.

“Brilliant, Mr. Lupin. Ten points to Gryffindor!”

Remus smiled hesitantly to the Professor before finding his way back to his seat, not daring to glance at her again. He knew that he'd unwillingly pour all of their efforts to settle to the new space down the drain. The disapproving look on James’s face and the small pitiful smile Sirius sent him as he pats his shoulder became the very anchor that would drown him deeper into his despair tonight.

All these weeks of play pretend, acting like he wasn’t bothered by the reckless stunt he’s pulled on her, is starting to crumble. One of these days he’ll succumb to another round of heartbreak and it feels like it will come sooner than later.

—-

If there is anything that she hates most about herself right now it would be none other but the fact that she still, after all these weeks, finds herself back to the library, occupying the very spot she used to share with Remus. His seat has collected a sheer layer of dust, being vacant for too long. She has been able to stop her eyes from staring at the door, minimising the anticipation should the very loved boy return, but it is obvious that the flame of hope is still burning bright in her heart.

She knows where he seeks solace now, her friends have told her about how they would find Remus reading alone at the Astronomy Tower, but coming and finding him there feels like overstepping his boundaries and crossing him would be the very last thing she fancies.

“So how’s teaching the third years?” Pandora asks, whispering to not anger Madam Pince “Did you tutor the kids alone?”

Mary shakes her head, “No, Lupin was there.”

“Remus?” The broken hearted girl asks, now interested in the conversation “I didn’t know he tutors now.”

“He does, apparently. Perhaps an effort to get over his crush on you.”

“Come on now, Mary, he doesn’t have a crush on me.” She defends, rolling her eyes “We’ve established this long before the break starts.”

“Oh but he does.”

She shakes her head, looking back to her book.

“So how’s the tutoring?” Pandora asks again “Anything interesting happened?”

“No, nothing really.” Mary answers “But I did notice that Remus has quite a bit of a strange fear.”

She looks up from her book, raising an eyebrow, “How so?”

“Well, we were teaching the kids boggarts and when some kid were too afraid they couldn’t say the spell right, Remus stepped in and the boggart turned into the moon.”

Pandora frowns, “The moon?”

Mary nods, “Right? What could be so scary about the moon?”

Her eyes trail back to the book, trying to read the words yet her brain was too busy pondering about the new information. Indeed, what could be so scary about the moon? Someone so smart and content like Remus, fearing the moon? What could be so bad about the moon?

—-

Prefect duty has always brought Remus peace as he could wander around the castle in silence, not having to worry he’d bump into anyone and having to plaster the fake smile on his face. He enjoys walking through the corridors with the limited luminosity of his wand. It gives him time and space to think about all the problems he tries so hard to push away during the day.

Yet his delight would have to come to a fast end tonight as he spotted a light inside the library.

Sighing, Remus walks in quietly so as not to startle the rebel. He would have to walk this mischief back to their dormitory now.

“Dove?”

“Remus!” She yelped as her head quickly snapped to his direction “What are you doing here?”

He raised an eyebrow, “I should be the one asking you the question. It’s past curfew, you need to leave.”

“Right.”

Hastily, she collected her books away. Remus could catch a glimpse on one of the massive books in the stack: Fantastic Beasts and Magical Creatures of the Wizarding World. He couldn’t help but to frown. She doesn’t take Care of Magical Creatures class this semester, so why would she be reading such a book?

“I’ll return to my dorm now.”

“Wait,” Remus calls, making her halt her pace “I’ll walk you.”

She shakes her head violently, looking horrified at the offer, “No, you don’t have to.”

“I insist.” He says “It’s prefect duty afterall. I have to make sure you don’t wander around elsewhere.”

“Right,” She gulps, blinking as if she’s trying to process his words “Of course.”

Now the two of them walk in the empty hallways in silence. The sound of their steps echoing through, neither soul is brave enough to break the stillness. Yet either knows that their heads were going crazy, thousands of questions running in each of their minds. Both could feel like their hearts were leaping out of their chests, palms sweaty and fingertips cold from the tension. It was as if they were back to the Potter Manor.

Minus the alcohol, of course.

Remus’ head was about to explode. He swore he could cut through the tension between them with a knife. He glances at her every other second, wondering why she’s kept her head down and not having a glimpse of him at the slightest. Could it be that his not so elegant confession at Potion class the other day made things worse between them?

“We’re here.” He says as they reach her dormitory door “Look, I’m really sorry about the other day in Potion class. I really didn’t mean to make things worse or anything, it just slipped.”

Her eyebrows furrow, looking confused still, “Alright.”

“I just thought I should put it out there and set the things clear between us.” He continues, trying to ease the baffled look on her face “Anyway, Goodnight.”

And with that, Remus turns his heels.

“Remus,” She called, making him to face her again “I know what you are.”

Now it’s his turn to frown, tilting his head to the side as he tries to make sense of her words, “How do you mean?”

“I know why your boggart is the moon.” She says gently, unsure if the words she utters are the best she could come up with “The full moon.”

Colour drains from Remus' face. Lip slightly trembling as he tries to lick the bottom, an attempt to fix his composure. He shakes his head as he lets out a forced chuckle, pretending to not understand the message she's trying to convey. He opens his mouth, only to close it again in fear he might out himself instead. He waited for her to continue.

“I now understand why you’ve been taking your monthly sick passes.” She continues, her demeanour calm “They’re not because you ate the wrong food or some silly allergy you caught, are they?”

He clears his throat, still pretending to be oblivious, “I’m not following you.”

“I know why you always have a pack or two of chocolate in your pockets. They’re laced with some healing potion, aren’t they? That’s why they make you feel better? And no matter how dramatic Sirius or James or Peter begs for you to share them, you’d always say no because you know that you need them, you need your remedy.”

The air suddenly feels like they’re being sucked out of his lungs. The atmosphere turns hot, beads of sweat beginning to form on his forehead as his fingertips turn cold. Never in his entire life did he expect to have this conversation now. Sure he knew that one day or the other she would figure it out, the mask he’s been showing to everyone would eventually fall, yet he wasn’t aware that such a day would come right here right now.

“Is that why you refuse me?” She asks, her voice creaking “Because of your condition?”

He stares at her intently, this time with a much more defeated expression, “You wouldn’t understand.”

“Then explain it to me.”

“I can’t be with you.” He heartbrokenly admits, tears beginning to well on his eyes “I’m a werewolf, is that what you wanted to hear? For me to admit myself?”

She remains quiet, mirroring his pained look.

“You’ve figured it out. You know my secret so now you’d understand why we couldn’t be together.”

She scoffs, a disbelieved smile tugging on her lips, “Don't think for a second that I'd turn the other cheek just because of that, Remus.”

“Just because of that?” He repeats, looking hurt “It's not just because, Love. I’ve lived my whole life in torture. There's not a single day where my bones don't break under my skin, not a single day where my joints don't ache whenever I do the slightest move. Do you know how hard it is for people like me to live? To function like normal people on the daily?”

“I didn't mean to undermine your situation, Rem. You know I didn't.” She quickly defends herself “I'm only angry and disappointed at you for hiding behind a reason that shouldn't even be a problem in the first place.”

Remus looks away, not having the strength to see her face.

“I love you.” She confessed with desperation evident in her tone “There, I said it. I love you, Remus John Lupin, with or without your condition.”

“No, no.” He says as he shakes his head “You don't know what you're talking about.”

“Don't I?” She chuckles bitterly “You think all these years tailing you around, making a fool of myself in front of others, was just my way of finding some fun?”

Remus bites his lip, frustrated at the situation they're entangled in.

“Why do you always belittle my feelings, Rem?”

“I'm doing this to protect you.” He whispers, expression filled with guilt “You'll have no future with me, you know that.”

“I don't care about-”

“Well, I care! I care about you and your future, alright!” Remus yells, his frustration getting the better of him “You have a bright future ahead. You're smart, you're beautiful, you're perfect. I'm not going to jeopardise your life just because of some silly puppy love you'll get over in a year or two.”

She remains quiet, staring at him intently in a way to understand his mind better.

“I can't be with you.” Remus says with a quivering voice “Maybe if I love you a little less then I could be selfish and ask you to be mine, but I don't. I love you too much to drag you down with me.”

“Rem-”

“I have to go.”

With that, the boy runs away with tears flowing down his cheeks. With every step he took, the anger and hatred he bore inside his chest grew. Shouldn’t love make your life easier? Shouldn’t it colour your days and make you go forward with ease? Why is it that the love he hoards for her only makes him suffocate? How is it fair that the love he so tenderly nurtures in his heart only causes him scar and pain?

Just how cruel the universe is to him.

—-

When James came to her with a bloodied shirt, she knew that something was wrong. It was a full moon and bearing the knowledge of Remus’ condition made it impossible for her to sleep a wink. She paces back and forth in front of the Portrait of the Fat Lady, waiting if something happens and she could be of help, though she knew nothing of Lycanthropy and how to take care of it. Now that James found her with a worried look, she’s certain that something had happened.

Now walking fast to the Hospital Wings, she finds herself biting her nails in fear. James’ message for her was short, only that Remus had asked her to come. After their confrontation a fortnight ago, having him request her presence is something she’s grateful yet afraid of at the same time.

“Ah, bless the Heavens, my Dear! You’re just in time.” Madam Pomfrey says as she enters, handing her a basin with a towel “Would you please help clean Mr. Lupin’s wounds? I’ve given him some potion but I think he will need more than the usual tonight, I have to get it prepared.”

“I-” She stutters “What if I hurt him?”

The healer smiles, “He’s called for you, didn’t he? He trusts you, you wouldn’t hurt him.”

Turning her body to face Remus as the healer leaves, she takes a seat by his bedside and begins soaking the towel. Her eyes stare at the fresh bloodied wounds, dirt and small leaves still staining his skin. Remus must be in great pain right now.

She gently wiped his cheeks, trying to clean as much dirt and blood as she could without putting too much pressure on his new wounds. The scar cuts were long and deep, making her flinch just at the imagination of pain he’s suffering. And to think that he has to face this every month was beyond her.

Quiet sobs were escaping her lips. As much as she tries to keep quiet so as not to disturb his slumber, she couldn’t help but to cry looking at his condition. If only she could take just half of the amount of torment he’s been through.

“I look hideous, don’t I?” Remus asks with a hoarse voice, slowly opening his eyes.

She shakes her head, “I’m sorry, did I wake you? Did I put too much pressure on your wounds?”

“No, you’re doing just fine.” He says with a small smile “Just lovely.”

She smiles back, continuing to clean his wounds.

“I made you cry.” Remus comments “This is why I said we can’t be together, I’m a monster.”

“You think I cried because I’m scared of you?”

Remus remains quiet.

“Remus, I could never be afraid of you.” She says gently, putting away the basin and holding his hand tenderly now “I just- I can’t imagine all the pain you’ve been through all these years and just how blind I have been for not seeing it.”

“It’s not your fault, Dove. You couldn’t have known.” He says with a weak smile “But now you’ve seen me, in this state, in my most vulnerable and naked state, I hope you can understand where I’m from, why we can’t be together.”

“Rem-”

“Love, I’m bad news.” He cuts in with a defeated smile, the beads of tears on his lashes now threatening to fall “I’m no good for you, you know that. You deserve someone who could match your perfection, though I know no one in this entire universe would ever be deserving of you, at least there must be some bloke out there who’s better than me, someone more deserving than me.”

She remains quiet, her tears could no longer be held in now.

“If I could find a spell or make a potion that could erase your feelings for me, believe me I would do it. I’d do whatever it takes to undo this mess between us.”

“No, don’t say that, Rem, don’t.” She cries “Loving you is the greatest thing that has happened to me. Even with your bloody stubborn head right now, I wouldn’t change a thing about us. Nothing.”

He let out a small chuckle before wincing, “Don’t make me laugh, Love.”

“Promise me,” She whispered, interlocking their fingers as she looked down to his hand “That you won’t do anything to forget about you or to not love you anymore, Remus.”

“I promise.”

She smiles at him, watching him intently as she tries to record every little detail of his facial features in her brain. Even with his tired and bloodied face, he’s still the most beautiful person she’s ever laid eyes on. The way the strands of his dirty blond hair fall on his face, the long lashes he has, and the scar across his face that are the very evident of his bravery over the years would forever be something she worships.

Gently, she caresses his cheek and whispers, “You know, if we kissed.. Just once, we could be happy.”

“I know,” Remus nods as he closes his eyes, trying to drown deeper into her touch “But I’m not ready to be completely destroyed by you.”

“One day, then?”

“One day.”

#remus lupin #remus lupin fanfic #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin imagines #remus lupin scenario #remus lupin scenarios #remus lupin angst #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x yn #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x oc #remus lupin oneshot

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